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Watching Everything From The Beginning, Part 16: Micronesia - Fans vs. Favorites

2024.05.15 18:02 TsUNaMyWaVe Watching Everything From The Beginning, Part 16: Micronesia - Fans vs. Favorites

TL;DR: A mostly-new viewer sharing her thoughts on S16, and hoping to continue to do so with the next seasons.

Previous posts:

Seasons 1-10	Seasons 11-20
Borneo	Guatemala
The Australian Outback	Exile Island
Africa	Cook Islands
Marquesas	Fiji
Thailand	China
The Amazon
Pearl Islands
All-Stars
Vanuatu
Palau

It has been… almost 1.5 years since the last time I watched Survivor. I can't believe it has been so long – the longest break I ever had between seasons since I first started this project (in 2020?? Woah). It has been so long, that even seeing James and Amanda felt nostalgic for me, even though they were fresh out from last season, lol. Another advantage – if I knew anything about this season before, I 100% forgot about it. Got to experience it as cleanly as one could – I literally knew nothing about who the winner or what the elimination order was. Let's get to it!
The game: not gonna lie, I was a little bit wary of the main gimmick of fans vs. favorites. I thought about how unfair it was, not just experience wise but also because the fans are probably just gonna be starstruck and unable to play against their faves. Luckily, I was wrong. It was actually way more balanced than I expected it to be. Sure, the faves had better shelter and better food and better everything, but I feel like this is a common situation in survivor, that one tribe is better off than the other, so that was okay.
Having 2 medical evacuations and 1 quit was wild. I feel like Survivor was always dangerous, so it should actually be surprising that something like that didn't happen until now. I really felt bad for Penner and James, hopefully they get to play again.
Having two people going to exile island each time in the pre-merge was an interesting choice, but nothing really interesting came out of it.
The end game though… oh boy. I actually thought that having 3 people leave would help production, because they had 20 people over 39 days. But ofc they were prepared and didn't like the quits, which is probably why we got the weird 8 jurors-2 finalist thing. I am not against the concept as a concept, but it did feel like a low blow that the contestants didn't know about it. And also as I said I think it should have been final 3 as always but they had to adjust.
So yeah let's talk about that FTC. I once again came in rooting for Amanda, and once again saw how bad at FTCs she is. Girl, please… at first I was a bit surprised that she lost, I felt like Parv had way more enemies in the jury. But then I read here in the subreddit about the full content of Eliza's question that we saw nothing from, and well… it made more sense. (Btw thank you Elize for kind of bringing in fallen comrades, it was the best. Ah, I missed Elize and I'm so glad she was in this season!)
So Amanda lost again, and Parv won, and I guess now I understand what's the big buzz around her that I didn't get when I watched cook islands, lol. Might as well mention the blindside since this was all Jeff could think of. Idk personally I'm not too impressed with blindsides, like sure yeah it's a cool move but it's way less drama inducing than when the person actually knows they are going to go lol. Tbh I was so mad that Ozzy got rid of Ami and Eliza that I was happy he got blindsided, lol.
The challenges and set: I know I am nearing the time when the set doesn't matter, but I thought I had a few more seasons of grace, especially after how amazing China was. I guess I was wrong. Well, the set in general was very lacking and most of the challenges were super generic, but the huge money wheel was cool, as was that village visit. I'll take what I can get.
But when it comes to actual entertainment the challenges were gold. I think aside from that gun shooting one which was kinda boring, the others were fantastic. A challenge is what gave birth to the iconic Joel-Chet moment, Amanda showed once again that she is a challenge beast that can't win the actual game, we saw Ozzy being defeated by a fan etc etc. Also the one with the cage going underwater is definitely a favorite of mine that I will be happy to see again no matter what season.
The challenge with the survivor trivia questions felt kind of rigged though, lol. Of course Erik will win that one… or even just a fan in general. That wheel with the logos on it was super cool, though!
The cast: in this kind of season, this should be the core, right? Well, I don't think it was the strongest cast ever but they did very well. From the favorites, the only ones I was super excited about were Ami and Eliza (where are my Vanuatu comrades at?), and as I said earlier I was really bummed when they were voted out. I also liked seeing James, Amanda and Yau Man back. The rest I wasn't big about but it's basically because I almost never ended up liking the big names players, and the big names players are the ones that get to return, so… lol.
Anyway, the fans had some highlights too, of course. I'd say mainly the Tracy-Chet-Kathy trio, the Natalise-Alexis duo the Erik and James the dummies. Each group had their own fun little storyline that also got woven brilliantly with the favorites, so it was definitely enjoyable to follow. I just feel like it was… more story driven than character driven, if it makes sense?
Though the small character moments we did get were gold. Jason and the f'ing stick, Erik giving up the necklace, Natalie opening up out of nowhere as an evil witch… over at the favorite side I actually feel it was more lacking – maybe it was because I already knew all of them before, I'm not sure. But I generally felt like their personality traits shone less, maybe aside from Parv who now I can realize got edited in a way she would be accepted as a winner (oh btw I'm definitely fine with her winning). I guess Cirie also got some of her usual Cirie-style confessionals, but she also got a lot of gameplay ones so yeah.
I wasn't attached to anyone personally so that's probably why I was slightly less invested, even though I enjoyed everyone a lot.
I read somewhere in the subreddit that this season was supposed to be AS2, but they didn't have enough big players to bring so they changed to fans vs. favorites. I think it was a good decision overall if I look at it objectively, but personally there are quite a few "smaller" players that I would have loved to see again lol.
Oh and I forgot to mention it earlier but I guess it also matches this category – once again I hated how they changed the opening for every ep and removed voted out people. Stop it. Stop doing it. Just put the full opening every time, it's not so hard!

And that's it for FvF! I might be a little rusty in summarizing my thoughts, but I'm sure I'll get right on track for the next season. THE NEXT SEASON!!! GABON!!!
Haha I might as well mention again that Gabon was actually kind of the only season I watched fully before, around the time it aired (maybe a little bit later because I watched it on cable TV in my country, and I'm sure we weren't 100% caught up, but the timeline match). I don't remember it in full details obviously but I do remember quite a lot – and I'm excited to see if it holds up and how much nostalgia I have for it lol. I'm definitely excited to see Sugar again!
Thanks for reading!
^*English ^is ^not ^my ^native ^language.

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2024.05.15 17:58 ArmChairAnalyst86 Space Weather Update - 5/15/2024 - Short to Medium Range Forecast & Observations - Article Teaser

Good morning everyone, AcA here and I have a brief (haha) update for you this morning. I felt it was pressing to give everyone an idea of what I am seeing and feeling headed into the next epoch of space weather. What a ride AR3663/3664 were? Long before most of you showed up for the biggest storm in decades, AR3663 was trying to get there, only to be usurped by AR3664 stealing the show. Well AR3664 has now departed, and the sunspot situation is complex, but not as intense as before it left. There are certainly more spots and active regions, but we are missing one with significant complexity and size like AR3664. ~~As a result, we can probably expect a quieter stretch of space...~~
Something wild just happened. Something that has happened numerous times since I have started this. Call it stupid, tell me I am ate up, call it woo woo, I don't care. I don't call it anything, I juste note its occurence. As I am writing this brief little snippet, X-Ray spikes, and topped out at X2.99. For the last 10 days, when I have seen magnitudes like that, I automatically go to AR3664, or went to I should say, but AR3664 is gone...so what AR is responsible? I can barely see the leading edge of the plage, but it must be respectable.
That is the beauty. Nobody knows. It is not visible and as a result has not received a numeral yet and we have zero real idea of what it looks like. However, we can extract 3 key details from this information.

- The sun is still very active - X flaring continued overnight with an X3.3 overnight and this most recent X2.99~ from a new contender.
- Something imposing is hiding behind the limb, and will be rotating into view, and appears that it will be X capable off jump street.
- The flare topped out at X2.99, but based on the signature, I would not be surprised if the actual flare magnitude is north of that. THis often happens when flares occur so far on the limb they are occulted by the sun. It affects our probes ability to measure it.
- The radio emission from this flare was over 1000 km/s. Wowzers

https://preview.redd.it/mg1mt1ugvl0d1.png?width=818&format=png&auto=webp&s=ebf33ff307f1bc8dde5b507717bd2a1b221077ee
Buckle up folks. Now hopefully you have got the drift. There is no certainty here. I think many people are forgetting one key fact about this game. Its comprised of two words. Space & Weather. Space suggests its distant, massive, and on scales far bigger than a human. Weather suggests its an interconnected and dynamic system of more variables than we can track or understand. Our brightest minds, best models, and best computers, cannot tell you with any high degree of certainty whether it will storm 5-7 days from now, maybe not even rain. If that is the bar for terrestrial weather, than what is it for space weather? I give you my take. I give you my analysis. I hope I am right, and alot of you are here because I have had a pretty good track record so far. Do not think for one second that I don't know that track record could fall apart tomorrow. I need you to understand that.
Internally though? That is a different story. My confidence is rising. My perception broadening and my understanding increasing. The beauty of space weather currently, is at some point you have to make a gut call. You read the same data as everyone else, and you make your prediction. The finer brush strokes don't always come out perfect, but the big picture is definitely coherent at this point.
OFFICIAL FORECAST - SUN
https://preview.redd.it/9bja58vvvl0d1.png?width=414&format=png&auto=webp&s=9bc0bf36701972c3c52f5e74e004db2bc937e34b
I expect a brief lull in activity affecting earth. Flaring may remain slightly elevated but we cannot escape the fact that AR3664 is out of the mix. The other groups are growing, but they are not growing exceptionally fast. That could change and we will keep close eyes on active regions. Here is a link to all SDO imagery with a few pointers
AIA 131 Teal - best for capturing the flash of flares.
AIA 171 Gold - best for capturing magnetic connections, overall activity, post arcade loops
AIA 211 Purple - best for capturing eruptivity during flares and dimming
AIA 193 Bronze - good for coronal holes esp, but a blend of 171 and 211 showing activity and a glimpse of eruptivity
AIA 304 Red - best for plasma filaments and prominences and eruptivity
The others are great too and have various specialities but the primary ones are above.
If existing active regions do intensify, the forecast will change. We cannot assume they will, although I think they will. The sun is active overall and is able to generate big flares from any location or sunspot group. Even though the existing are not huge gashes like AR3664, AR3664 had humble beginnings too. Even though the spots on the disk are compact, they are fairly intense. I believe the official forecast reflects this. Even with AR3664 off the disk and no longer listed, the M-Class chances are 75% (too low) and the X-Class chances are 40% (I agree). They are seeing the same thing.
OFFICIAL FORECAST -EARTH
WSA-ENLIL shows an atypical setup. There are some small CMEs in the pipe and we are passing through a solar wind enhancement. Not sure where it came from but the parker spiral action is carrying it to and through us. Nothing big out there right now though. CME production remains elevated, including several potential full and partial halo, but currently nothing substantial aimed directly at us. DONKI shows a minor impact in the coming days with max Kp3.
Our star has made its most prolific run yet over the past few weeks. Both generating massive geomagnetic storms on earth and massive flares. Yes, SC23 was more intense in every facet, but SC25 is not over. It has already far exceeded SC24 though and its not close. Get this little fact.
In SC24 there were approximately 48 X-Class flares in the entire cycle which spanned from 2008-2019. In the past 2 weeks have seen more than 25% of that total. In 2 weeks, we got 25% of the way to the entire total of the previous 11 year cycle. And that does not even count the years and months prior of SC25, just the last 2 weeks. I think Mr McIntosh can take a victory lap. He went against the grain, called this a big cycle in direct opposition to NOAA on the basis of his own theory. Bravo! Its not done. We are in solar maximum and that is clear, but what is not clear is just how max this max will be? Nobody can predict the future or what will happen tomorrow on the sun, but I can say that there has NEVER been a better time in all of our recorded civilization to get acquainted with and understand space weather. Not only because of the activity level, the tools available to everyone for free, but because we must be on watch. We are the watchers. If you are here, you know what is up. The rest of the world does not. They do not understand space weather and the think its impossible to do so. Too complicated. Well that is where you come in. Learn it. Understand it. Teach it. Its going to matter in the coming decades, and I would bet everything I own on that. Does that mean CE 2.0? Hell no. Don't immediate jump to extremes, but here is the simple facts. We hit extreme storm levels last weekend from not so extreme storms. It did not harm anything. No widespread damage, just some localized stuff. A transformer blew up in a city about 50 miles from me overnight. Don't see that often. Could it be coincidence it occurred as our earth is trying to process all of the excess energy and current coursing through it? Sure it could be, but I am paying attention. Seismic activity is sharply rising the past few days, with significant attention paid to the south pacific and the caribbean currently. Weather and cloud anomalies all over the place and in strange places. The link to cloud anomalies shows iridiscent clouds usually spotted in polar regions only, yet these are in Vietnam. Many other places too. Are you paying attention?
Coming Article Teaser and Open Letter
I am going to touch on my article that is in the works just a little bit. A teaser if you will because I think it needs to be discussed right now, but when I release it, you will need no less than an hour to read it. It will be comprehensive and supported. I am shooting from the hip here, but I do so from an informed standpoint, the same standpoint I want you to arrive at.
What does ALL of this mean? Should I be scared? Can I jump to conclusions about this? Stop it. One day at at time. We are not scientists here. Most of us have no degrees or letters behind our names. We come armed with logic and the powers of perception, ready to learn. We are in the observation stage. We are looking for signals, correlations, coincidences, anomalies, patterns, etc. We must all determine for ourselves the truth of the matter, with our own eyes, and it starts right here at solarmax.
Now let me get something straight. I am very excited about aurora chances and the study of this field. I have no reason to believe we are in imminent danger. I have no reason to believe that we are in imminent danger tomorrow, or any other time. I recognize that like many forces of nature and the cosmos, that the sun does have the ability to make life pretty hard here, as well as makes all life possible. I give it the respect it deserves, but I do not give it fear or panic. I give it logic and rationality. Logic and rationality tells me that something is up with our planet, and I am not sure its so easily explained by the current narrative. I see man made climate change used far and wide to excuse every development from earthquakes, length of day glitches, changing earths rotation, etc and who am I to argue? I have no degrees as I said. I am just a self taught dude who likes space.
But I would offer them a challenge. Find a way to attribute last weekends massive geomagnetic storm from some relatively low magnitude CMEs to climate change. Go ahead, I will wait. No one would argue that the CMEs from 2003 were stronger, yet the effects were nearly identical and anecdotally more intense. How did our Co2 do that? They will attribute it to starlink satellites or something else man made. ESA swarm mission will tell you that its only decreased 9% on average whatever the hell that means. How can that be, if its been weakening at absolutely positively no less than 5% per century on average with modern estimates much closer to 5% per DECADE. The average rate of loss is no longer reported and is a mystery and possibly a closely guarded secret. As a result, I have no numbers or figures I can give you that I can prove. I will offer you a challenge too though.
Look around. Do you see a pattern? Do you see an acceleration of "things"? Everyone does. Cant deny it. Climate change is a good candidate for it, but we must factor last weekends geomagnetic storm in as anecdotal evidence that something could be changing, quickly. Its not proof. We could not go to a court of law and establish it as fact without refute. Some could say the CMEs combined in an unusual way and it somehow drastically magnified the overall energy content into a single wave. Maybe that is true. I cant refute it with data.
But....we can watch for the next one. We will get another big storm? I dont know. But we will be watching. If we see another storm like last weekend from low end X-Class flares, that could change. Our argument could strengthen, but we must approach it scientifically and logically, even if we are not scientists. Immanuel Velikovsky said that the test of a theory should be the explanation that requires the least in the way of modification, qualifier, and assumption to arrive at a conclusion. Pardon my french, but fuck what the mainstream is telling you. I am not saying they are lying, but am I saying trust your eyes, your instincts. This is IN you. It is in us all.
Thank you for making SolarMax a top 12% space and astronomy subreddit. I am a modest and humble man, but we are doing good work here. I am moved and touched by all of the posts, comments, questions, articles, and observations. Someone made an excellent observation overnight about the possible sympathetic nature of the flaring yesterday on direct opposite sides of the sun that I had made myself, but not brought to your attention. I thought maybe the timelapse just made it look sympathetic, but evidently others noticed too. That is what this is all about. Again, I am an armchair analyst. I make no bones about that. I have no qualifications that I could point to that says I know what I am talking about. When I say self taught, I do not just mean this subject. I am self taught in life. I barely graduated high school. I was essentially guaranteed graduation because my high school could not wait to get rid of me. If you are looking for good grammar, punctuation, syntax, etc you will not find it here and ultimately qualified or not, the results and predictions will pan out and prove it or they wont. Either way I will not lie to myself about it. I have been preparing for this for months and I did not know why I was preparing, or why I felt making this sub was so important when so many resources already exist. I am going to ride that wave, but I expect you all to keep me accountable.
I am sorry this was longer than expected. I hope you can get the message and be an adult about it. I am not saying we are in trouble, but I am saying we need to be paying attention. If you want to freak out about it, I cant stop you. Arm yourself with knowledge, and you yourself will know, when or if it is time to freak out. Arm yourself with knowledge and you will not be swayed by twitter idiots and AI written articles which sensatonalize the topic and only give the worst case CE scenario because it sells. I realize now that its not practical to guide you through each event, that we will grow past that point, and as a result, you must teach yourself with the tools here and elsewhere. Not even just for yourself, but for the rest of the world who do not understand space weather and they need someone to trust. Why not you?
With love and respect,
AcA

submitted by ArmChairAnalyst86 to SolarMax [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:56 awjeezrickyaknow Album of the Year 1997 Pregame Thread

90 responses(!!) but sadly we could only save 4 albums and there were two big ones that almost made it in but not quite.
1 and 2. With 31 votes each you made it clear you wanted Built to Spill's incredible indie classic Perfect from Now On and Janet Jackson's highly acclaimed and beloved concept album, The Velvet Rope

With 29 votes: Ladies, gentlemen, and gentlethems we are picking Ladies and gentlemen We Are Floating in Space by Spiritualized
Finally, with 27 votes we have Third Eye Blind So if your fave didn't make it in please step back from that ledge my friend.

RIP Stereolab and Yo La Tengo, they fought hard but came up short with 26 votes each. The Fat of the Land managed to get 20 votes while the Foos and Daft Punk each got 15. You can check out the results below.
For now, go ahead and listen or re-listen, come up with your rankings and I'll see y'all in about 10 days.

Radiohead - OK Computer
Modest Mouse - The Lonesome Crowded West
Bjork - Homogenic
Elliott Smith - EitheOr
Portishead - Portishead
Godspeed You! Black Emperor - F♯A♯∞
Deftones - Around the Fur
Ween - The Mollusk
Built to Spill - Perfect from Now On
Janet Jackson - The Velvet Rope
Spiritualized - Ladies and Gentlemen We Are Floating In Space
Third Eye Blind - Third Eye Blind

Bracket 1 Results
Bracket 2 Results
Lifesaver Results
PREVIOUS AOTY WINNERS (Click to view full event)

PREVIOUS AOTD WINNERS (Click to view full event)

submitted by awjeezrickyaknow to music_survivor [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:53 Reasonable_Cream_719 I (28f) don't want to dismiss my boyfriend's needs (29m) but I feel like he remains upset over things to really intense levels and makes me seem like the only one at fault in conflict. How could I help him see he's acting unreasonably and/or convince him to try couples therapy with me?

I'm scared that I'm completely losing myself or being emotionally manipulated in my relationship. (1 yr together, known each other for 10). My partner (29 M) supports me in my self care & work & hobbies & loves to boost me up, but he also frequently tells me things I've done wrong. I'd always rather he be honest about his feelings, but i feel like it's very frequent. Something comes up at least twice a month where he says he doesn't feel listened to or valued or "like a partner" in our relationship and things blow up. This has happened for 3 months now. Before this i dated someone for 4 years who was very reserved, so I got used to feeling very needy - therefore, I have a lot of empathy for needing love and affection and I try to make his needs met. I have tried really hard to fix previous tangible concerns like letting him know when I'll be away from my phone for a while or making changes to not be late to things. We have had some really good strides where I've been able to tell him my needs more or own up to my small failings. But the last 72 hours have been a nightmare even with my growth and progress. I'm sorry this post is lengthy but I'll try my best to explain the current situation:
Sunday my bf slept through his brother coming to visit on accident. He woke up and texted me and said he was spiraling a bit about feeling bad about it and would be okay but just needed a "5" to show him I was there. (this is supposed to be a call back to us saying I love you 5 ever in the past)
I didn't see his text for 30 minutes and then told him l was soo sorry I didn't see this sooner and that I was really sorry he slept through his alarm and missed that, but his body must have needed rest. He said it's okay, it's just my brother.
We spoke for 40 minutes about mothers day and other stuff and then he said "hey you never sent a 5" and I said "oh shoot, 5". It then was shared that it really upset him that I hadn't read and replied to that part of his text. It made him feel not listened to, he said, that I chose to reply how I wanted instead of doing what he asked for. I apologized and also said sorry I didn't say a 5 sooner and that I wish I had seen his text and sent a 5 right away. He got upset that I was apologizing for not texting him right away. He said apologizing for the thing he's not even upset about (not replying for 30 minutes) takes away his agency and takes away from him feeling heard.
He then explained it wasn't fully about the 5 - it was that it hurt that I didn't ask more about his feelings and just changed the topic after he said "it's okay". I think sometimes I forget people say "it's okay" to try to be strong when really they want to talk about their feelings. He emphasized he wished I had asked about his feelings and I said I definitely should have and need to be better about asking more follow up if he opens up and says he's spiraling.
I apologized a ton Sunday night and called him and cried to him on the phone about how much I cared and how much I didn't want to hurt him. He told me it was going to be okay and he even told me he felt loved and cared about. He showed appreciation when I took accountability and I said things like "I totally see how it made you feel not heard that I didnt do a small thing you asked for" and "I really should have followed up by asking more about your feelings or why you were spiraling".
Monday he got upset again once he woke up and said I was defensive yesterday and it hurt and that I talk at him and not with him (I did get defensive a bit by saying things like "I didn't know you weren't still okay and I took it at face value when you said you were okay" or saying "I told you I know I messed up and I shouldn't have ignored you opening up to me" when he brought up again how hurt he felt. But sometimes he repeated how hurt he was and how he wished I would hold myself accountable. So I would at times get defensive by saying "well I tried telling you that I'm sorry I ____"
I didn't know what to keep saying besides sorry and that I messed up. I tried keeping my answers brief after he said i was making things about myself (being emotional in my guilt) because i didnt want to risk monopolizing the conversation. Then he told me I really hurt him because he shared 2 paragraphs about how hurt he was and I gave a 10 word answer. I apologized multiple times for my 10 word answer. I said I only kept it short to keep the focus on him. He said it felt like I wasn't even trying. I tried asking what else he needs or what I could do to help and he told me I'm just Asking "out of self preservation". Then when I said I wish I knew what I could do to help he said "did you ask". Three different times when I said I wish I could make him feel better or things like I am trying to give thoughtful answers he would say "did you ask" and then I would say "ask what?" And get frustrated when he didn't give me a straight answer. When I got upset for not getting an answer to my question, he said I was making it about me again.
At some point he asked for examples of me asking accountability. I sent screenshots of when I said I messed up and hurt him and I should've done differently and he got upset and said "those are from yesterday and don't impact how I feel today". I tried taking accountability again today in multiple sentences. He seemed grateful that I did and was glad to hear me list the things I messed up and take the blame for. But then when I brought up something i was hoping we could still do (a surprise party for him) he got really upset and said I was only thinking about what I wanted (to see him and get him to the surpise) instead of what he wanted (to not go out). This led to him skipping his own surprise party yesterday. It was so embarrassing because I didn't know how to explain why he wouldn't come with me (I was supposed to be the one to bring him to the surprise) and his friend ended up making up that he got too wasted beforehand. Even since the party he has only said how his wishes feel ignored and he never wanted a surprise party (I guess a misfire but his friends really wanted to do the party so I went along). No apology for not even coming.
A chunk of yesterdays convo, word for word: M: "I felt so small when you gave me a 10 word response I felt like I didn't explain enough or wasn't good enough . And to not really have a response, it hurt me so bad."
F: "I'm sorry for hurting you so much and giving so small of a response. I'm really sorry for the things I did to make you feel small."
M: "thats not what I'm worried about or bothers me"
F: "What are you worried about or bothered by? You shared it Made you feel small when I sent a 10 word response, so I thought that was a part of the problem."
M: "Not really related and makes me feel worse about getting the love I need/want"
F: "i don't understand. You brought up how much hurt you and how low it made you feel, how is it not related?"
M: "Did you ask?"
F: "I'm asking now"
M: "I'm sorry, I didn't realize you being hurt negated everything I've felt?"
F: "What? Where did I say I'm hurt?"
M: "You're asking a question so you could feel good or secure but I dont feel I'm afforded the same"
A seperate convo chunk later that day:
M: i spend so much energy and get so little in return. When I reach out and ask for help everything gets focused on how you felt. When do I matter?
F: I'm sorry. I hope you can get to feel like you matter now. I have been trying to do what you need and put very little focus on myself and I'll keep trying
M: If you can't try or listen to what I'm saying or asking for just leave me alone and make this whole situation easier. I'm exhausted and tired from giving you grace and somehow things always focus back on you.
_--- Then In several texts asked him if he explain how things kept coming back to me and he said the focus just keeps coming back to me.because I won't take accountability. He is embarrassed and doesn't feel good enough. Because I don't show him support when he needs it and don't show i care in the ways he wants or needs the way he supports me when I'm low.
F; I'm sorry and I wish I had afforded you the same. I'm trying to give thoughtful answers, sorry if they have to be short because I'm at work. Can you explain how you feel like the focus has been coming back to me in today's convo.
M: did you ask?
F: ask what? How did I make the focus on me?
M: dude we aren't doing this again
F: dude I asked for clarification becuase I don't get your question
M: It's not about you. I don't think you're ready or capable of loving me the way I want or need. I feel like I've given you grace and afforded you the space to make or acknowledge mistakes. I can't keep begging to be heard and feel like I'm overreacting or misunderstood. It's fine to ask for clarification, but when you do it hijacks the conversation and we never revist what I said.
F: because I don't get an answer so it's hard to revisit the topic when I'm still confused
M: I'm sorry , I didn't realize that me spiraling or being in a bad place was only continued because you didn't get a response. This isn't about you.
I want to get him to couples therapy because I care about him SO much and he has a really big heart and a good soul. But once he feels hurt, it's like he's stuck being the victim and can't see how horribly irrational our conversations are going. I am not perfect at conflict either - I get defensive if he keeps talking about being hurt, and I end up crying a lot to him about how bad I feel for hurting, and sometimes he has to help me calm me down from my intense crying over the problem I caused, which is draining for him. But I think at least in this case he is really stuck in a victim complex where he isnt doing any wrong and I'm not doing much right to him. I genuinely feel like therapy could really help, and that the couples therapy would support my individual therapy working on defensiveness and emotional control. I want to support him, but I'm nervous to just outright ask for it. What do I do? How could I ease into the topic?
TL;DR: Although I have tried to be very patient and take accountability there are a lot of things I do that hurt my boyfriend. I have worked on improve some concrete things but our most recent conflict (detailed above) has me feeling anxious and lost because I try taking accountability throughout but he is still upset no matter what I say. I don't think he knows how to handle conflict and I'm not perfect at it either but i am very willing to name everything I do wrong and try to change it. I want to suggest couples therapy so he can see we can both do better. Not sure how.

submitted by Reasonable_Cream_719 to relationships [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:53 shaneka69 CANCER ZODIAC - UNEXPECTED INCOME! TAROT READING MAY 2024

CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ5mIkLhCyY
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submitted by shaneka69 to mytarotreadings [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:53 BornLuckiest Are you wearing your Tinfoil Tuxedo and Top Hat? Renaissance Tech acquires $12.5mn shares in Gamestop, and Jim Simons dies! 👀

So, you probably wont have heard of Renaissance Technologies (aka RenTec), perhaps one of the original Quantative HFT Hedge Funds, established in 1982.
Well, they invested $12.5mn in Gamestop, but it doesn't stop there.
Their signature Medallion fund is famed for the best record in investing history.
Sources:
Cover Page 13F-HR for Renaissance Technologies
Breakdown of Holdings for Jan to Mar 24 (Cover Page above) 👈Search this link for Gamestop, and you'll find 1,004,958 shares in sole ownership (that's not b*eneficial *ownership, for those paying attention) and they have full voting rights, meaning they are not lent out for shorting.
You'll notice this is a "NEW" investment, and it's not present in the previous filing, despite them having many investments in other gaming companies (as they obviously see Gaming as a huge growth area.)
Gamestop (GME) 1,004,958 Class A Shares worth $12,582,000
Previous Source: Breakdown of Holdings for Oct to Dec 23 👈 no matter how much you search you wont find Gamestop in here.

THIS IS HUGE!

I could stop this post right here, because this alone is enough for a huge discussion and debate, but there's been something niggling my Spidey-senses, but we'll come to that in a bit.
First, let me tell you why this huge; Dr Jim Simons isn't just the founder of some random High Frequency Trading (HFT) Investment fund. He's like the inventor of it all, if you'd like to learn more then read "The Quants: How a new Breed of Math Wizzes Conquered Wall Street and Nearly Destroyed It" (Try and find it in an old book shop rather than using Amazon though - be smart - know your enemy!)
Anyhow this legend has more weight and is arguably more respected in finance circles than Michael Burry, (that's the guy from the Movie "The Big Short") and we all know Burry bought into Gamestop in 2019, BEFORE Ryan Cohen - he's well regarded around these parts. The buzz about Michael Burry buying into GME had Roaring Kitty (aka DFV) and Ryan Cohen so excited, that they both increased their positions considerably.
This guy, is the godfather of wall-street, he began the most successful investment fund EVER (Medallion) and the company that runs the Medallion fund, invests a huge amount ($12,582,000) into Gamestop, and on the SAME DAY it's announced, Roaring Kitty comes back to life?! (...this ain't no Cohensidence!)
Jim Simons
Assuming Roaring Kitty's had a silence agreement in place for 3-years, then if we look at the detail, that silence order should/would have ended weeks ago. So, if you believe he was silenced (and if you have been following his Twitter, then that seems to be apparent) then he chose his moment! You can see how Roaring Kitty has been preparing for the last 3-years, and it's obvious that he timed his play.

DO YOU SEE HOW HUGE THIS IS?

So, don't get distracted, 'member this; RenTec are long Gamestop, this was announed the SAME DAY that ROARING KITTY returned - and from what I can see, RenTec have not lent out the shares, they have SOLE voting authority and SOLE investment discretion.

THE COLOMBO QUESTION: "EXCUSE ME DEAR APE... JUST BEFORE YOU GO"

So, firstly, have you got your tinfoil ready to wrap around your head? ...because I know you all love this wild-speculation, it's like a cherry on top of a really amazing piece of news!
These 13F-HR filings are required every 3-months. The deadline to file after each quarter is around 6-weeks after (42 days later than the reporting period end) to give them time to prepare the filings, etc.
Generally, it only take a week or two to prepare these things, big companies have people dedicated to the role, and often these filings are given to dedicated clerks whose job it is to to cross the Ts and dot the Is of a semi-automated report before filing to the SEC. So within certain circles many people, are aware of the content.
Once filed it takes a day or so to process, and you know there's a lot of revolving doors on Wall-street, so information travels fast, as that's the main currency of the economy.
So this position, would have been made public to those in the know, you get me? That's not so wild, perhaps one would say, "fair speculation", right?
72 hours before this is made really "public" knowledge to the rest of the world, (when millions of ape eyes are all over Jim Simons, asking him questions) he dies. The guy that no-one can out-think, the guy that dabbles in multi-dimensional topography for fun. Someone that could be a real threat to the AI trading algorithms that are currently manipulating the market and taking away price discovery. He's dead after announcing his company invested in GME.
This is really sad news.
Now, yes, he's was old, 86, that's a good innings. Especially for poor people like us, but when your one of the richest and most powerful men in the world, that's actually is not that amazing! Just look at Charlie Monger (100yrs), Warren Buffet (93yrs), George Soros (93yrs), Rupert Murdoch (93yrs), Henry Kissinger (101yrs), Queen Elizabeth (96yrs), etc. I don't need to bolster that argument; it's pretty much a fact money gives you good living, good food and good healthcare.
Here his Jim giving an interview, just over a year ago: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUTaQvnwLzM
It's worth a watch, really nice agreeable guy, a bit of a rebel, and he's got life in him, he liked breaking things, but he doesn't look like he's on death's door to me, but make your own mind up.
No statement has been made by the family about how he died, but every good tinfoil wearing ape knows, if they want to "Clinton" you, they have ways.
I do agree that this last bit, is pretty wild and speculatory, but it's not hard to imagine that people with almost unlimited money and power can get rid of people who are going to be a spanner in the works of their plan, right?
So, you know where I am going with the final stack of speculatory tinfoil theory; What actually happened to Jim Simons?
Jim Simons (1938–2024)
Rest In Peace Jim, but after all that has been said, he left us legacy;

RENTEC are bullish on GME! 🦍🚀🌕

Edit: Typos and Grammar, and some minor word additions to make it read better - same as always.

submitted by BornLuckiest to Superstonk [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:52 Gatorsforthiscreator I need to vent, maybe kind feedback on what can help - Day 4 NC

Here is my breakup story.
Eric and I have been together for almost three years. We had some differences, that’s for sure. He had a brain injury that had an impact on his speech, and motor skills. Sometimes he couldn’t feed himself without flinging it everywhere, so, being completely able-bodied I would happily help. He couldn’t walk correctly without it eventually leading to falling down. I would be his human crutch; he would stand behind me with his hands on my shoulders and the weight of our bodies would work together to keep him upright. It was much easier for me to put his socks on him, than for him to do it some days. So I would do that, and so on. I never minded, not one bit. It never even crossed my mind as the slightest bit of inconvenience. I loved him, and still do - and that love was untouchable. Could not be matched. That’s not to say he won’t find someone who loves him as much as I do, but I know that my love for him is unconditional, and endless. It is stronger than anything I have ever experienced. We both had insecurities, often he’d ask me who was messaging me when it really was just a game notification, or ten. I played a lot of phone games; bingo, solitaire, slots, word games, whatever. They’d coincidentally all notify me at the same time, typically on the hour, every few hours. I’d do the same, ask “who are you texting?”. Funny, neither of us had a reason to worry about it. We both are loyal.
We also had great similarities, we worked together, in my eyes. We would laugh about the dumbest things, belly laugh uncontrollably. We knew exactly how to comfort each other. The little sweet things all added up and made for what I thought was a perfect little peaceful home of a person. Our views on social issues, or moral standards aligned well. Of course, we had some disagreements too, but no two people in this world are 100% eye to eye.
April 6th I boarded my first ever plane, at the age of 25 with Eric. We were flying to Florida to stay with his mom and her long-term boyfriend at a new home she had just purchased, a seasonal home. This trip was really fun. I loved the time I got to spend with him, and his mom and her partner. On the last full day, we were there we had gone to a beach, and as cheesy as it sounds - he picked up a pretty dull looking seashell that was in front of him. He asked me to add it to the bag of unique looking shells I had walked around gathering. I asked him why… It looked so ordinary. He told me for some reason that’s the first thing he spotted when he realized he is going to marry me. This made me so happy; it made me feel even more secure than I already did.
Fast forward to when we arrive home, the following day. We relaxed over the weekend and then returned to our Monday through Friday jobs. I work 9-5, and then three nights of the week would have night class from 6-10. He works 3-11, and so he’d get home just a tad bit later than me. I almost always stayed up to see him, we’d say hi, cuddle, and go to bed. Each weekend we had with each other we would spend time doing whatever, but together. Come the beginning of May (Last week) it was a Monday. I went into school 30 minutes early as requested to speak with the director of education. They terminated my enrollment due to an incident that occurred between me and 5 other classmates. An argument, one that should not have happened. I had remorse for this from the mintue it ended. Eric had told me the night the argument happened, while I was upset, that he won’t be mad if I get terminated, he thought my reaction to the situation and how I handled it was valid. As long as I stuck through, and didn’t drop out over it then he wouldn’t be mad. I agreed, no dropping out. Thursday I got a text message from him. He told me that I have 8 days to move out. That our relationship has been such a big part of his life for so long, he needed to be on his own, be with his friends - essentially that he needed to find himself. In this message he always advised this was nothing I did, that he will cherish all the memories he has that we made together. That I was a great girlfriend. He also said that he doesn’t want me reaching out unless it was to discuss the division of our belongings, and that doing this face to face would not be healthy or productive, it will just make it harder.
So… Hold on. A month ago, you told me you love me so much, and one day you’re sure you’re going to marry me. I could hear the honesty and vulnerability in your voice, I could see it in your face. Those were not lies. Now, all of the sudden, even though you called me babe just this morning, and asked me to pick stuff up from the store for you on my way home… a couple hours later, out of nowhere, you’re just…done? This doesn’t make sense. None of it makes sense. I am destroyed. I love you more than anything and would have - did, do anything I possibly could for you, but you think life without me will be better? That fucking hurt, no actually - I swear it killed a part of me. I’m not angry. I am so God damn fucking sad. I am lost. I am anxious. I am scared. I am alone. I feel abandoned. I am uncomfortable. I see no future anymore, the rug was ripped from under me and I was left alone, to get my stuff out as soon as possible while trying to nurse a torn apart, stomped on, broken heart… and what is worse for me, is you’re worth it. You're worth a million more heartbreaks. People keep telling me to “try to think of the reasons why this is a good thing” but I tried, so hard, and I can't. To me there is absolutely not one good thing about this for me. I can’t stop thinking “is he going to realize this wasn’t the right choice?” “Does he care at all about me?” “How can he not care not one little teenie tiny speck about me, all of the sudden?” “Is he hurting right now and his coping mechanism is to shut me out, 100%, completely?” “Will I ever even hear from him again?” “Is he ok?” “Does he miss me?” “Does he hate me, for essentially… no reason?” “Am I doing the right thing by abiding by his request not to reach out to him?” “Maybe he is waiting for me to reach out to him anyway… but he told me not too.”
I am so lost. I miss you him much. I want him to realize the same. I want him to text me and say, “I don’t know what I was thinking, I miss you, can I see you?”
But all I’ve gotten is radio silence… I’m not religious, I wish I was - in a time like this I feel that faith is the only thing that could make someone feel ok accepting of the situation… but I still pray to God, or whatever higher power there is that he changes his mind.
I saw him briefly two days later when he came to get some clothes for himself, and I made him tell me to my face he doesn't want to be with me anymore. He said he does love me and care about me, but this just needs to happen... and before I go thinking there's someone else, there isn't. I know there isn't, though.
Sunday, neither of us reached out to one another. This Monday, I texted him to let him know I will continue paying the credit card bill, I will let him know when I'm finished moving out, and asked if there is something he'd like me to do with his laundry (we had a laundry system due to his disability). This was the first time I got no response... and still, nothing. I didn't reach out Tuesday (yesterday) and I haven't today.
God, I need help, but no one can give it to me. I am helpless.

submitted by Gatorsforthiscreator to ExNoContact [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:52 Mystic_Diamond Jane Seymour has the reputation of being the wife Henry VIII loved the most but do you think she genuinely loved him back?

In my opinion, Henry VIII basically believed he was in love with all of his wives except for Anne of Cleves (the one marriage made purely for political purposes). His brand of "love" is the furthest thing from what we would call "healthy" or "unconditional" but however you want to define his feelings for the women he purposefully chose to marry, HE believed it was love and he was a deluded romantic like that. At the same time, I also think his love for Jane Seymour more so sprouted from all the right coincidences falling into place. Had his marriage with Anne Boleyn turned out the way he hoped, he might've only indulged in a passing attraction to Jane or not noticed her at all. Had Jane died giving birth to another girl, Henry might've never bothered to remember her fondly and regarded her as a failure like Katherine of Aragon and Anne Boleyn. As a result, I don't like the popular belief that she was his "true love" because he probably would've fell out of love with her if she disappointed him as much as the other wives did.
What's worse, people never talk about Jane's feelings for Henry regarding her position as his "favorite wife." Considering Katherine of Aragon's final recorded words about Henry, it's safe to assume that she truly loved him despite everything he did to her and I think there's evidence that Anne Boleyn might've loved Henry at some point too (yes, I agree that what he did to her amounts to stalking in the modern day but according to courtly love traditions, Henry's behavior would've been seen as romantic and unfortunately, being a smart woman doesn't protect you from falling for men with huge red flags). The last three wives's feelings towards Henry are way more likely to be pragmatic in nature, considering Henry's monstrousness was on full display at that point. But as likely as Henry's feelings for Jane were real (as real as they can get for him), what do you think Jane's feelings for Henry likely were? While we have Katherine of Aragon's final letter to Henry and Henry's love letters to Anne Boleyn, I think the only evidence we have of Henry and Jane's love is the stuff that Henry had made after Jane died, the painting of her with his children and their shared tomb.
In my opinion, I think it's much less likely that Jane had real feelings for Henry than Anne did. People forget that Jane was a part of an ambitious family too and while we'll never know how much of an enthusiastic participant she was in it, Jane also clearly had a strong faith in the Catholic Church and wanted the monasteries restored. She probably saw being Queen of England as a way to fulfill her personal goals for the country (though she failed to do so, whether out of fear for her life or a plan to play the long game combined with an unfortunate early death). Of course, I don't advocate for the position that Jane was a scheming heartless bitch because it lowkey feels like a vindictive way to stick Anne Boleyn's bad reputation onto Jane's "boring good girl" image. Trust me, I'm an Anne Boleyn fangirl for life but smearing Jane's reputation feels hypocritical and wrong. I prefer to think of Jane as an ordinary young woman like Catherine Howard, who would've happily lived a normal life if her family wasn't so close to politics.
I think in a world where Katherine of Aragon's sons lived, England never broke with the Church, and Henry still felt the need to whore around like he does and happens to still fall for Jane, Jane would've rejected his advances and meant it. It's almost ironically funny that Jane gets cast in a romantic light the most out of Henry's wives when we really don't know whether she really cared for romance that much. Katherine of Aragon and Henry were well-known as a love match before everything fell apart and Anne Boleyn fought hard to get with Henry Percy before Wolsey put an end to it. Catherine Parr fell for Thomas Seymour (AKA, my example that being a smart woman doesn't prevent you from falling for red flags) and Catherine Howard might've (emphasis on "might've") genuinely loved Thomas Culpeper. Meanwhile, we don't know anything about Jane's love life beyond a failed engagement before she met Henry and everything memorialized Henry's passion for her was made after her death. So who knows what Jane felt about the guy while she was actually alive? Who knows if she would've genuinely been flattered by the way Henry remembered her? Who knows if she was a romantic person at all or just a woman who wanted England to remain faithful to Rome?
What do you guys think?

submitted by Mystic_Diamond to Tudorhistory [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:51 Difficult-Wave9729 Reality or Nightmare?

Do you ever have childhood nightmares or dreams? As for me, at a very young age, I always got nightmares whenever we watched something scary or even just a mention of ghosts. Where I grew up in the Philippines, there was this fantasy show that we watched as kids. Thinking about it now, it's kind of creepy. Whether it was about fairies or friendly ghosts, I still got creeped out and had nightmares about it. There was this nightmare of mine that traumatized me as a kid. You don't really remember your dreams until you're eating breakfast and it suddenly hits you that you had a nightmare before waking up. It's about this island. Imagine the town/island where the Teletubbies are. That one, but imagine it with brown grass instead of green, complete darkness instead of the baby sun, and instead of open space, it's filled with creepy trees. All I remember is running towards that forest and something chasing me. I couldn't look back and kept running. I could feel the trees snitching on my location until I stumbled over a big root of a massive tree.
There's a scratch on my knee and I can feel it sting. With my petite body and out-of-breath lungs, all I did was stare at my bleeding knees. I wasn't crying, but I know I was scared. *Dum...dum...dum.* I could hear it, not in my ears but in my heart. It seems like my heart is synchronizing to the vibration. I still don't know what's out there, but I know I should be running away from it. I saw a silhouette walking towards me slowly. It's big, but not giant big. I close my eyes and then suddenly I am awake, lying down straight like a person in a coffin.
I never talked to anyone about my nightmares. It's normal to have nightmares, but the people around me are saying that it's not normal for a kid to sleep straight like a dead body. I never really took it seriously. I kept having weird nightmares of running in a dark place again. I still don't know who's chasing me. When you are a kid, you have very vivid memories of what your childhood was like. Mine is filled with nightmares. I did still enjoy my childhood and yet still able to be a 'normal' kid. I had plenty of friends, played in the street, and did such fun things. I still feel like something is missing and I tend to mix up memories with dreams. When you are a kid, you have such wild imaginations that you think it is real, but once you turn into an adult, you think that it's impossible for that to happen in the real world. That is just one of the nightmares that stuck in my head and that something I still dream about.
I remember having this dream, or perhaps something happened? Until now, it still confuses me, but here's how it goes. I was playing with my cousins and some of our friends. It was in the middle of the night, maybe 8 or 9 PM? I know it was dark, with streetlights shining through the street. Living in the busiest city in the Philippines, you would still see a bunch of people outside. We were playing hide and seek. I was thankful that I was not 'it' this time. As the seeker counted to 10, we all spread around and found a place to hide.
I decided to hide behind a motorized tricycle, as we simply call them tricycles (just Google what it looks like). One of my friends came with me, but I told her to go away as I didn’t want to get found. She ran off and found another place to hide. I was chuckling, and I could still hear people around me talking and laughing, but in my mind, I just didn’t want to get caught.
I didn’t hide far away from where the seeker was; I could still hear him counting 'and… 10.' Suddenly, everything went quiet. I was quiet too, as I didn’t want him to find me first. I crouched back behind the motorized tricycle, and I could hear him walking far away from me. I sighed with relief. I heard that he found someone far away, as I heard one of my cousins scream in excitement because the seeker found her.
I chuckled.
I didn’t hear any footsteps, but I could see a shadow coming towards me as the tricycle was parked just below a lamppost. I slowly moved around to avoid being found, circling slowly and getting into the rhythm of the shadow. Now, there was a gap inside the motorcycle where I could see the other side. I slowly looked through the gap and, to my surprise, saw a figure looking at me. I got startled, but I didn’t scream. I stood up right away, and to my surprise, I was back there again, on that island.
The tricycle that was in front of me became a tree. Not just a tree, but a tree with massive roots that made me stumble in my previous dream. I was confused. Even now, as I think of it, I know it’s not a dream, but it's getting weirder. My first thought was 'Where are my friends?' The figure I saw earlier was gone. I got out from behind that tree and searched around the forest for an exit. As I was running, I could hear mumbling sounds. I was a kid, and my brain was controlling this stuff, so I went and followed the sounds. One sound seemed familiar—it was my friend's voice—but it seemed like something was stuck in her mouth; it was echoing through the forest.
As the sounds became clearer, my eyes couldn’t believe what I saw. My friends and cousins were tied to the trees, their mouths covered with tape. In my mind, I had to get out of there because I was scared as hell, but at the same time, I wanted to help them. I ran to my cousin first, and as I was going near her, a figure appeared behind her tree. It had eight hands like a spider, but it was brown and shaped like a cockroach. It had a face like a human—technically an image of a human in a cockroach-spider-looking costume. His or her face had makeup that blended with what it was wearing, and it was smiling towards me; I could see its yellow teeth.
"We've looked everywhere for you," it said while slowly coming towards me.
I couldn’t speak or move. I was so scared. I wanted to cry, but I couldn't.
"Now we can start the game," it said in the friendliest way possible. "I won't hurt you or your friends. I just want to play," it added.
Being raised to be nice to everyone, I nodded. I still wasn't speaking.
"Can I get a hug?" it requested.
I nodded again.
It hugged me, and I could feel all of its legs on my body. The thing I thought was its costume? It was actually connected to it. It was warm, and I just closed my eyes. I touched one of its legs, and it felt sticky. Suddenly, I woke up and saw my grandma's husband staring at me, telling me to wake up as it's time for school, and then he left. I saw my left palm was kind of sticky, sweat, I guess.
That's all I can remember from that time. I went to school and lived the rest of the day as a "normal" kid, still thinking about that nightmare. Some of my dreams are not all nightmares; they are happy dreams too. But what's stuck with me is that every time I have a nightmare, it's basically a continuation of the other, but it only happens once I completely forget about it.
Later that same year, I dreamt about it again, but differently. I had already made friends with this creature. It seems that I completely accepted it, and I was not scared of it anymore, but I was not happy either. There was something about it that still seemed odd to me, but I was just not reacting to any of it. We would play tag, hide and seek, and other games. As I noticed the place getting darker and darker, I also noticed that a few of my friends who were in my dreams were getting fewer and fewer until it was just us. It still kept its attitude, lively and happy to play with me. I asked it, "Aren't you sad?" It just kept smiling for a good 5 seconds and slowly frowned, answering, "Why would I? You are all I need as a friend." Then it started jumping around like those mascots you see in kids' TV shows. I remained the same, not happy, not sad, but I went with its flow.
I also noticed that before I woke up, it hugged me, like saying goodbye and at the same time inviting me to see each other again. There was something about its hug too. I could feel the warmth of its eight legs covering my whole body and its breath around my neck. In my dreams, I kept touching at least one of its legs. It seemed that it became a habit, and I could feel it sticky. I woke up again in a straight laying-down position, and my hands were drying, but I could feel the wetness. Then my grandma's new husband was ready to take me to school again.
When I was 9, my mom decided that my siblings, my dad, and I would move to my mom’s side for 3 years before leaving the Philippines. It was my dad's side where I kept having nightmares. I don’t get those nightmares anymore. Sometimes I miss them, and sometimes I wonder if they miss me too. I stopped looking for them. I feel like they went away when I started going to church with my strictly Catholic grandmother. We had to wake up at 6 am to prepare for church, and every day for those 3 years, we had to pray at 7 pm for an hour. We knelt in front of the saints' statues, and my belief in God strengthened. I forgot about the nightmares. I lived like a normal child, had a great childhood, had a bunch of friends, and grew up to be a decent girl. My mom announced that we were all leaving for Canada, and I just remember being so excited about it.
I was 11 years old when I and my friends were playing outside my house. I know I was still a kid then, even if my grandma keeps telling me to stop playing as I am already a grown woman (culture things). Our neighbour's are like aunts and uncles to us; I play with their kids sometimes who're the same age as me. We are all close to each other, even the adults. They treat us as their own since my mom grew up with them as well. One of my neighbors, whom I called “Tito” (uncle in Tagalog), called me and asked me when we were leaving for the Philippines. I told him soon, and he told me how I looked like my mom. I told him how much I miss my mom and how I cannot wait to see her again. He gave me a hug, and then my world stopped. This hug looks familiar. I can feel his breathing around my neck and the warmth of his hug. His hands are playing on my back, slowly stroking it. I swallowed and told him that I had to go since my grandma was probably looking for me. He let go and smiled at me. I just felt tears running through my eyes, and everything came back.
I was SA when I was a kid. I was SA by my step grandfather at my dad’s side. I feel like throwing up, and I can feel everything crawling toward me. I remember the first time he did it. When my mom left, he started touching me. As a kid, I treated him as a monster and just created these scenarios in my head. Even my childhood friends saw it, but since we were kids at the time, what would they know? It was inside the motorized trycicle where he was touching all over, but he said that we were just playing hide and seek and that he found me. It was then that I was so ashamed to play with my friends, as I remember one of my cousins stopping coming over because he started touching her too. The place is my dark place. Now I remember everything. I was so mad and angry. I remember that I would wake up in those positions after he touched me and felt my whole body. And remember the sticky thing in my hands? Yeah, it was his semen that he wiped away before I got to sleep, which is why whenever I am about to wake up, he is almost always there.
Now that I am in my 20s, I have tried to move on, yet the trauma still lingers within me. That monster died a few years ago, and his last words to me were, “Do you still remember me?”. I never had a chance to confront him. I opened up about my experience to a couple of my friends and gave advice to those who have experienced it too. I help those friends of mine who are still experiencing it and assist them in getting out of that situation. My only regret is that I was too afraid. I used to blame myself, but not anymore. None of it is my fault; I was just a child. I was not strong enough to keep my peace, still thinking that it is all a dream for the sake of my peace of mind. I wanted to apologize to the kid in me for not protecting her during those times, but I will never let that happen again to anyone that I know of. I now live in Canada, working in an office and happily thinking that my monster’s body is burning in hell. Thank you for reading. Please always watch out for whoever is watching your kids, your younger siblings, as you never know even the very person you trust can do massive damage to your loved ones.

submitted by Difficult-Wave9729 to nosleep [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:51 Significant-Owl5869 AITAH for not doing anything anymore for my husband?

I’m just at my wits end here. I (28f) love my husband (29m) very much. I’m just tired now. We have 3 kids (1f, 6f, & 10f) together, one whom is on the autism spectrum (severe).
I’m technically a SAHM. I have a “part time” job that I work 1-3 days out of the week. My husband has 2 jobs.
My credentials allow me to only work a few days out of the week but it’s the equivalent of his jobs. For example if I work one day, I make what he makes at his part time job that he goes to all week. If I work the 3 days I make what he makes at both jobs all week and maybe even a little more. It just depends on what I want to do. Depending if the week with the kids is heavy I do one day but with 3 kids it takes a lot of my time and energy so I opt for 1 day mostly. It’s just to bring in some cash for the extra curriculars my kids do or house bills.
We don’t do 50/50 but we are like 25/75. I pay for all the groceries, all the utilities, anything our kids or myself and my husbands needs.. he pays the mortgage and a few other things. We have no debt, no car payments.. We are very good with money and have a nice chunk of savings. He doesn’t need a second job he just has it for us to save the most now that we’re young and not just scraping by when we’re old lol plus we want to buy another house soon. He’s been at the second job officially one year next week.
My husband feels like I don’t do anything and that my life is so “easy”. He constantly makes comments like “here let me make your life even more easier” cause I ask him to take out the trash or “you don’t do anything here and we wouldn’t have this if it wasn’t for me” just because he’s upset I didn’t check his car for a sweater he wanted to wear to work and it’s not clean. Then he feels bad and doubles down and apologizes. Mind you, I do All the cooking, cleaning, parenting, kids sports, appointments, etc. I pack his lunch, I iron his clothes for work, I make sure he has plenty of snacks he likes at home so he isn’t grumpy throughout the out the day, I wake up earlier to prepare his coffee before he leaves to work, plus I work my part time.
When I do go to work he does nothing for the kids. It makes me feel bad to say that. I come home and our kids are not fed, not bathed, he just puts them on their tablets on goes on about his day but the second I walk through the door, “they been on their tablets too long. Tell them to get off and go do something with them”..
This last argument has made me realize he has no idea how to be a parent.. he’s always opted for a shift in the middle of the day, stay up all night and sleep all day. Ever since our oldest was born. Now that he has two jobs he hardly sleeps and it makes me feel bad for him. So I try my hardest to make his life easier. He just doesn’t appreciate it and I’m tired.
So a few days ago, after his last big tantrum, I stopped. I haven’t cleaned the house. I cook but I won’t prepare his lunch. I stopped doing laundry. This morning he finally ran out of clothes and he was ANGRY. I told him I had no laundry soap. I ran out a few days ago and he needs to go buy some.
He’s not a bad guy. He works his butt off to be able to keep a roof over our heads. He hardly sleeps now because his jobs are physical and he wants to buy me a new car because we’re expecting baby #4 in a few months. I know he loves me but he doesn’t appreciate me. Honestly it feels like he starting to look at me like I’m a burden..
Now I want to show him what it’s like not having me meet my part of our marriage. If he feels like he does it all then I’m going to let him do it all. I’m gonna let him pay all the bills this month and I’m not going to contribute a dollar. I’m not going to do the laundry. I’m not going to pack his lunch. I’m not gonna let him come home to clean house. If in his mind he does it all, he should do it all, right? So, AITAH for letting him do it all by himself?

submitted by Significant-Owl5869 to AITAH [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:51 That-Specialist6050 WIBTA for confronting my friend for trying to plan a vacation without me?

I (F31) have three friends (F28, 29 & 32). For the past 10 years or so, we have all vactationed together, travelling the world and making amazing memories. I got into a relationship about a year ago and will soon be moving in with my partner. Because of this, I wont be able to travel with them as much. We have had lots of deep talks about this, where I have shared mainly the following points:

I am so happy, but I do feel nervous about the big life changes happening in my life and a bit worried about 'drifting' from the group
I 100% expect them to still go on and do things without me
I'm not ruling out vacations completley, but maybe not so many

We went out two weeks ago and I mentioned me and my bf were looking at booking a holiday in January. It was just in passing and wasn't brought up again. The next day my friends 'A & B' came to me with some news. When I went to the restroom, C had proposed a vacation to them. They asked when, and she said January, the one time I definitley can't go. They said they waited for her to bring it up again when I was back but she didn't. They appreciated they were in an uncomfortable position but knew this was wrong and that I would likely be upset. I was livid at first, mainly because I had shared so much of my worries with C in particular. I wouldn't have minded if I was at least included in the conversation, but it seems to me she activley brought it up when I wasn't there for a reason.
I've taken a few days to think it over and I am seeing her soon anyway. I really feel I want to raise this, even if just to say how hurt I am by this and get some answers as to why she has gone about it this way. It's made me feel like I've done something wrong, because as far as I knew everything was fine.
While I know for certain C does not want my man (and vice versa) a very small part of me wonders if she resents what we have sometimes. She has been down a lot recently about not having a relationship. Although I love my partner and am happy with my choice, I do sometimes envy my friends freedom, so I do think this could be possible and playing into why she's leaving me out?
But that's another reason why this has hurt my so deeply. I go well out of my way for this person and I'm happy to. When she's worried or upset I do everything I can to be there for her. When things are going good for her I put in extra effort to celebrate her. I do for all my friends. I feel like this has not been reciprocated. I have mental health struggles which sometimes makes situations like this hard to deal with and at first I spiralled hard. I understand she is not responsible for my reactions to things, but I'm still human and I'm feeling a little betrayed.
WIBTA to speak to her about this? And any advise on how to handle it would be great. Thank you.
Edit: I forgot to mention. These are my only friends lol. C has lots of different groups of friends which is great for her, but I'm really weighing up my options here because on one hand I feel I should be able to share how I'm feeling, but on the other hand I feel a responsbility for keeping the group together. If we fell out badly, it would be awful as we're so integrated into each others lives. If I get this wrong I could end up with no one (except my wonderful partner).

submitted by That-Specialist6050 to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:50 nonbitingfly Passed Yesterday!

Whew, so glad that’s over! What a relief! I provisionally passed yesterday. Thank you so much to everyone in this group for the help and encouragement. Paying it forward by sharing my experience and study methodology.
I’ve posted a few other times here leading up to take the exam but rather than linking to those posts, I’ll just recap here.
My background:
I’ve spent 8 years in security training and awareness. I was recently laid off from one of the big tech companies. No technical background whatsoever. I have a bachelor’s degree in marketing, a bachelor’s in finance, and an MBA. No formal education in IT. Two years ago, I studied off and on for about a year and sat for the CISSP. But I didn’t get it. I made it to 150 questions and didn’t pass. So starting out with the CISM, I had a lot of test anxiety and really didn’t want to feel like I felt when I failed the CISSP.
My study resources (in order of time spent):

QAE
Mike Chapple’s Study Guide
Gwen Bettwy’s Audiobook
PocketPrep

Total study time: ~30 days about 2-3 hours per day
Study Methodology:

QAE - Take practice exam 1 - scored 63%
QAE - Complete structured study plan - averaged around 70%
QAE - Take practice exam 2 - scored 80%
Reference notes from QAE and review other study materials to fill in gaps
QAE - Take practice exam 1 - scored 85%
QAE - Switch to adaptive study plan - averaged around 78%
Take practice exam 2- scored 83%

Study material overview:
Echoing what everyone else says here: the QAE is key. The exam questions are super similar in structure and difficulty. I learn best by taking practice questions so that’s where I spent 85% of my study time. You just need to make sure you're reading the explanation part, even if you answered correctly. There's good information included in the wrong answers.
Book wise, I probably wouldn’t use Chapple’s book again and would opt for the Official Review Manual. And I really only used the book to reference areas I couldn’t get my head around. Do I think the QAE was enough? Hard to say. I had a decent foundation starting out since I’d studied for the CISSP prior. But you can see from my first practice exam score that I was no expert starting out.
Again, repeating what most people say, PocketPrep was decent for testing knowledge but I found the actual question wording to be unnecessarily confusing, at times (sorry, Gwen!). I liked the audiobook for drilling concepts into my brain while I was gardening, cooking, driving, etc. I really liked the questions and answers at the end of each chapter. I feel like hearing the questions being read out loud and having to think about the answer triggered my brain to work a little differently.
How I managed my test anxiety:
A few days before the exam, I drove to the testing center to see where it was. This alleviated some anxiety about parking, where I actually needed to go, and how long it would take me to get there. I saved my second stab at Practice Exam 2 for my final day of study which was two days before the exam. I pretended it was the actual day of the exam. I woke up early, had my coffee, ate some breakfast, did an exam meditation from Calm, and then locked myself in my office with ear plugs and sat for the test. Took me about an hour and a half to complete the practice exam and was good for building some stamina. The day before the exam, I did zero studying.
Day of the exam:
My exam was scheduled for 9AM. I’d been fighting a sinus cold a few days prior (hello allergy season) and I coughed ALL. NIGHT. LONG. Not only that, but I’d been coughing so hard I pulled a muscle in my neck the night prior. When I woke up the morning of the exam, I was working with about 2-3 hours of sleep. I felt terrible. Had my coffee, ate some breakfast, cried a little and felt super sorry for myself, popped some Advil, pulled myself together, and then drove to the exam center. I’d brought a little pack of tissues and some cough drops but I wasn’t allowed to bring them in with me. But that turned out to be okay; it forced me to take breaks every 30 minutes or so. I’d walk out of the exam room, blow my nose, grab a cough drop, take a deep breath, and then get back to it. Since I was so exhausted and having trouble focusing, I think this helped keep me alert.
I found the exam to be really similar to the QAE. The questions were straightforward and I didn’t feel like I was doing mental gymnastics like with the CISSP. I read each question several times and, before even looking at the possible answers, I paid attention to what my brain was serving up as an answer. Lots of questions around business impact analysis, risk assessments, risk management and BCP, DRP and incident response. Questions posing scenarios and asking “What should you do FIRST?” I flagged maybe 20 questions and came back to them before ending the exam. I changed a few of my initial answers but not sure if that was wise. I’d say I felt fairly confident I was passing as I was answering questions.
When I clicked the “End Exam” button, my heart starting pounding. “This is it,” I thought. But no, that wasn’t it. There’s a survey. And the survey asks if you used ISACA’s official study materials and your satisfaction with them. I was thinking “How do I know if I’m satisfied with the study materials if I don’t know whether I passed or not!?” After I quickly made my way through the 15 question survey, my heart started pounding again. Alright, now, THIS is it. But again, it wasn’t. I had to answer a survey about my exam center. For the love of Pete, another 15 questions. I blew through those questions as quickly as possible and FINALLY, I got the “Passed” screen. I had a huge smile on my face and intentionally took a long moment to just take it all in.
Side note: a week before, I booked myself a 90 minute massage for later in the day of the exam. I figured it’d be a great way to decompress regardless of whether I passed or not. And it was such a clutch move. Definitely do something nice for yourself after the exam because you deserve it!
Hope this is helpful to someone. Study hard, prepare well, believe you're going to pass, and go for it!

submitted by nonbitingfly to cism [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:47 grimoras How do you plan? How do you model?

Hello everyone!
I’m a first year-teacher. I’m completely burnt out. I just had my end of the year post-observation; and I did poorly. All of my observations so far were in the developing/effective stages.
My last observation was in math. I love math. But with these group of kids, it’s so hard to teach it. I’m usually burnt out at this point of the day and I’m just trying to survive. My lesson was marked as “ineffective”. I was inconsistent with my objectives and I did a big whoopsie and made an exit ticket that didn’t correlate with my objective. We were comparing fractions. I made an exit ticket where they were making equivalent fractions.
I was told that “math isn’t your strong teaching point”. I was compared to teachers who are probably good at one subject but not the other. I nodded at this critique but I was hurt inside. I was given a few good pointers.
For math, how do you guys do it? How do you plan for the lesson? I get told so many things and pointed to people who “could help” me but sadly don’t. There were times I need resources for a math lesson and my school resource teacher didn’t have them.
What are your go-to resources? I currently teach 4th grade and we’re using bridges. The teacher guide for these lessons suck ass. There’s rarely any modeling, and if it is, I’m awful at finding them.
Please give a newbie some pointers. I feel like a failure.

submitted by grimoras to Teachers [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:46 Wooden_Cucumber_8871 I think Playing CAN BE Practice

I've made some big strides I feel in the last couple of months, and I did it by playing. I would say my playing to practice ratio has been about 80/20.
1.) I didn't treat playing during my practice sessions casually. I wasn't gambling, but I was playing serious sets. Keeping score is important.
2.) I'm not playing with people I know I can beat. I know it sounds kind of elitist, but if you want to get better then you have to play people that are better than you. It's just the way it works. I'm lucky to have some better players around that will play me seriously, but also impart pool wisdom for free. I guess you could say that developing relationships with other serious players is an extremely important part of getting better. Sometimes just having someone around that is willing to tell you why you missed a shot or lost the cue ball is invaluable.
3.) I use playing-as-practice as a sort of dress rehearsal for league matches and tournaments. It's about adopting the mentality of a match for me. I'm truly practicing my mental game this way. I'm going through my preshot routine, analyzing the table, and constantly monitoring my focus and emotional state.
4.) I am actively looking for problems in my game. Which isn't hard to do most days. Just as an example, I had trouble playing a specific shape where I needed to stun off of a rail with running english. It came up a couple of times during the set, and I performed poorly on all of them. (Couldn't get a feel for the speed of the shot basically.) Now I had an element that I could focus on in my next solo practice session. I was able to address a hole in my game without the harsh penalty of losing a league match or getting knocked out of a tournament.
5.) It's really helped me not burnout and still get my time in at the table doing meaningful things. I actually feel like I'm doing less "ball beating" than I was when I was trying to focus on solo practice.
I think playing CAN BE great practice f you adopt the right mentality about it, but out of all these points I think 2.) is the biggest and most important. The people in my billiards community are the biggest positive factor in helping me improve and also just nurturing my love of playing pool. It truly makes me sad when people describe the toxic environment in either their local league or bapool hall. Maybe I'm just a softy.

submitted by Wooden_Cucumber_8871 to billiards [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:45 SpiritedBrilliant703 How the heck does these dudes sell $140 box of 12 cookies?!

You've heard of selling ice to eskimos, but how about peddling humble cookies for $140 a pop? Sounds like a total pipe dream, right? Well, meet the cookie kingpins at Last Crumb - the cheeky LA upstarts who've done exactly that, building a multi-million dollar luxury brand around...baked goods.
I know, I know. When you first hear that premise, it's one of those things that makes you spit out your drink in disbelief. $140 for a box of 12 cookies?! What sort of Willy Wonka shit is this? These guys must be hopped up on something strong to think they can rebrand grandma's classic chocolate chips into objet d'art territory.
Except here's the kicker - their delightfully insane idea worked. By meticulously studying the playbooks of streetwear drops and luxury fashion houses, Last Crumb cracked the code on transforming an everyday grocery item into a covetable status symbol.
Their whole approach is basically an elaborate Jedi mind trick designed to short-circuit our perceptions around what "luxury" even means in 2023. You've got the minimalist, fashion-forward branding that oozes expensive European boutique vibes. The wildly overengineered unboxing experience that turns opening a cookie box into an ASMR-laced treasure hunt. The vegaspilled copywriting that stops just short of suggesting you might actually be eating edible gold flakes or something.
But the real stroke of genius? How they gamified the entire Last Crumb experience to manufacture scarcity and prompt that delicious social media fear-of-missing-out. Their cookies get released in these hyped, limited "drops" just like a new Yeezy sneaker. You've got to black Friday stampede for a spot on their waitlist, then pray you can snag one of the precious few boxes before they sell out in minutes. Which they always do, because these savants have turned getting a Last Crumb delivery into the bakery equivalent of scoring courtside seats.
By piggybacking on all the artificial scarcity and tribal signaling motivators that drive the resale sneaker economy, Last Crumb kicked off this crazy word-of-mouth cyclone. Now their cookies are like the new Birkins - if you can cop a box for yourself or bae, you've gotta 'gram those things to flex that you're an official member of the cookie club.
It's honestly just tremendous amplified marketing jujitsu, repackaging a familiar grocery staple into the ultimate guilty pleasure indulgence. They've essentially made eating cookies an illicit thrill again, like you're cheating on your diet with some wild truffled tobacco creations from the back alley of a Parisian patisserie.
Are the cookies themselves really worth $12 a pop? Probably not - they're just extremely well-executed, premium baked goods at the end of the day. But by cribbing from the basic supply/demand mechanics that drive the luxury x streetwear universe, Last Crumb created both the ultimate grocery store heist story and a new benchmark for disruptive food marketing.
So while it's still undeniably goofy watching people plunk down generational wealth on some cookies, you've got to take your hat off to these guys. They didn't just sell us cookies - they hawked the escapist dream of sugary opulence itself. And at the end of the day, that's one luxury more of us should be willing to indulge.
Key Learnings:
Here are the key steps Last Crumb took to turn humble cookies into a $140 luxury product:
Positioning and Branding

Positioned themselves as a luxury brand with a chic, minimalist visual identity inspired by high-fashion brands.
Used aspirational copywriting that invited customers into the "Last Crumb Experience" rather than just selling cookies.

Premium Packaging Experience

Custom packaging designed for the ultimate unboxing experience, with cookies presented at precise angles and in matte-coated bags.
Included a magazine with each box to add storytelling and depth to the product.

Exclusivity and Scarcity

Adopted the streetwear "drop" model, releasing limited cookie collections exclusively to those on the waitlist.
Created artificial scarcity by ensuring inventory sold out within minutes of each drop.

Gamified Experience

Made customers join a waitlist and countdown to each drop, building anticipation.
The scramble to secure a box before it sold out created a feverish fear of missing out.

Social Currency

The exclusivity and luxury positioning turned getting a Last Crumb box into a status symbol to show off.
Encouraged customers to share unboxing videos and show off their rare cookies on social media.

Creative Brief for Customers

Designed a unique cookie tasting ritual that gave customers something novel to talk about.
Turned customers into brand ambassadors by giving them an experience worth sharing.

submitted by SpiritedBrilliant703 to EntrepreneurRideAlong [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:43 ddnsty My SIL (F38) is trying to be back in my(31F) life and I don’t know how to handle it. How should I proceed?

My sister in law and I have had essentially no contact for 4 years and she’s been trying to be back in my life and I really don’t know what to do.
History: Since the start of my husband and Is relationship there has been tension from her. She would do odd little things at the beginning but I never pushed back. If my husband and I were on our way out the door to go to dinner or do something and she was fully aware she would “need something” from him or try to get him to stay home with her.
If we were taking trips out of state and we had to give her a ride I’d have one rule no weed smoking in my car since it was over state lines and KS is not marijuanna friendly. She would repeatedly ask during the drive and talk about how “it wasn’t a big deal” and would not drop it but we wouldn’t let up.
Essentially every boundary him or I would make would be tested.
We had a big blow up years ago when planning a mutual friends bachelorette party. Things really fell apart when she tasked me with the job of getting her cousins so drunk they pass out so everyone could enjoy recreational drugs without the younger (21 & 23) sisters around. When I refused this as it is dangerous and insanely cruel she and I finally blew up. She blamed me for being defiant and looking for a fight which led to me removing myself from the situation. I did not get her brother involved because it had nothing to do with him.
She then sent my husband a message that talked about how bad I was for him, how he use to be so happy before he met me, how he was never angry until he met me (his grief from losing his father figure turned into anger issues that he worked thru) she went on and on insisting that he wasn’t happy, he wasn’t loved, and he would be better off without me. My husband read the first two lines, forwarded me the message, and deleted it. It was essentially a letter on why he should leave me. I’m thankful he was no longer able to be manipulated by her because honestly the message was so manipulative he caught on quick and HE chose to distance himself. Throughout the years I’d ask him to text his sister for her birthday. To check on her. I wasn’t going to have a relationship but I encouraged him to have one with her.
Since we have been at family events and I made sure his family didn’t know any better and was very cordial but the times we did see each other there was no changed behavior. She was still doing the same selfish and manipulative things. We didn’t have to worry about it run ins with her often because she moved out of the country and it was pleasant.
She’s now moving back to the states and text me (I haven’t text her in 5 years) telling me about how she’s so happy to be back and I didn’t respond. She’s now back in our lives and I don’t know how to handle it. She tried (thankfully unsuccessfully) to take the most important thing from me and I don’t think I can ever forgive her for that.
Now we are working on starting a family and I don’t know how to distance myself from her without looking petty or upsetting my in laws. I personally want nothing to do with her but don’t want to hurt my family. I also don’t trust she won’t try and manipulate my future child like she tried to my husband.
What do you recommend I do? How can I not rekindle the drama but stay distanced?

submitted by ddnsty to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:41 Better_Initial3920 Finished first playthrough!

So dialed in. Had so much fun with this game. My first souls-like game so I struggled for a while and was honestly so ass for a bit. But I love that really the only way to beat this game is just to get good. There really isn't another way. The boss design for the most part is super cool and does a great job at making you feel that you are really defying all odds to beat said boss. To me the hardest bosses were:

Manus- His attack pattern is so gnarly and it can be so hard from i-frames perspective and it was just so unpredictable. It took me around 30-40 tries.
O and S- Holy shit that boss was fucking insane. I had heard rumors about it but wow was it tough. Just doubles there is so difficult. Had to use Solaire
Kalameet- Honestly didn't really like this boss that much but it was pretty hard. I thought he was a fucking cheese monger.

Some of my favorite moments: When you finally find that bonfire where the first blacksmith is. The feeling of bliss after hours of trying to figure out where the hell to go was unmatched. Also the Gough cut scene when he shot Kalameet, that was swaggy as shit. Also freeing big hat logan, that was super cool because I finally made a story connection on my own and was super excited about it. On the negative side I felt like the 50-75% part of this game was kinda ass. So after you beat and O and S and are going through demon ruins and izaleth. It was just kinda boring and felt like I was just kept on warping to bosses to check a box of a checklist. As opposed to the begining and the end game where it felt more exploration based and you would be heavily rewarded for that.
Overall super hyped. Would love to here some thoughts on my takes and other first playthrough experiences. Also should I play ds2 or just skipped to ds3 and then move onto the other fromsofts games?

submitted by Better_Initial3920 to darksouls [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:35 otherLife88 Should I go back to bedside nursing or pursue Epic Analyst positions?

I am currently an informatics analyst working for the hospital. I have applied to a few Application Analyst jobs and I'm wanting to go to Epic (charting system) after working 7 months in this role. Now that I have a little non-bedside experience I am seeing the reality of the salary. I love this job exponentially more than bedside but my cousin who graduated nursing school with me said he is going to Oregon to make 140k as staff. They're unionized there so they have 1 hour paid lunch breaks, and he said they're treated great. Oregon is MCOL. Upon scouring reddit, I'm seeing that anything close to 140k as an Epic analyst is quite the minority and rare to see unless you're in a director type role. If you do make anything close to that, it is atleast after 4-6 years perhaps. I make 73k right now as an informatics analyst and made 72k in the same hospital as a NIGHT SHIFT ICU critical care nurse (low pay is partly why I left; to search for more lucrative salary).
Eventually I want to quit everything all together within the next 10 years by using passive income from real estate investing (Just built my first home and renting out the extra bedroom units to travel nurses).
What do I even do? I am seriously considering going back to bedside nursing even though I hated it and had so much anxiety; but it could be my environment as well - I am a minority in the south (live 40 minutes next to Harrison, AR) and in Oregon I wouldn't be.... I wouldn't do ICU again either so that would maybe make a big difference.
I love the autonomy of Epic and working from home. But I can barely save up to purchase my next rental property like this. If I am trying to get a higher salary, it'll take years to get to 140k. Homes in Oregon are expensive at 400k average as well but I am not opposed to out of state investing.
Any advice is appreciated.

submitted by otherLife88 to nursinginformatics [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:28 _for_support New here. Just looking for some kind words.

Hey, everyone. This is a throwaway account just to avoid any issues. I posted here a couple hours ago with my main account, but deleted just in case. I'm happy to provide my other account to the mods if needed. Also, I'm so sorry in advance for the long post. I just needed to at least hear some kind words, so thank you for hearing me out.
My wife struggles with BPD, Bipolar 2, and CPTSD. She also suffers from Fibromyalgia, Endometriosis, Hashimoto’s, and Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria. We’ve been together for about 15 years, and while everything has been extremely hard, I want to stress that I do not blame her for anything. She is in DBT and Trauma Therapy, and is actively trying to work on herself. She accepts responsibility when she’s aware of a problem and tries her best to remedy things where she can. I love her and appreciate all the hard work she puts into trying to fix things and learn where she can improve.
With that said, I can’t fully express how hard things can get on my end. She’s federally disabled, so she stays at home and just focuses on herself as much as she can. The world can be challenging, though, especially with her degree of disability, so she doesn’t go out much. She ends up feeling very alone and has created a codependent situation where she doesn’t feel comfortable going out unless I’m with her, and when she’s not having a good BPD day, approaches me as if I am required to provide her that support or attention and failing to be there for her or failing to want to do those things is treated equivalently to depriving her of an emotional need. She doesn’t act that way when she’s doing well, but when she has a bad day (which can be somewhat often), that’s when I’m blamed. With this, my life is just going to work, working as hard as I can to support her, coming home, giving her all my free time because she’s been alone all day, repeating that until the weekend when I do work around or outside of the house, and give all my free time to her again. I understand how unhealthy it is to not have any form of self-care available to me, but so much as mentioning that I want to do something for me can sometimes devolve into abuse, so I often just stop trying and do my best to get some enjoyment out of the time I give to her.
Outside of those social issues, she also tends to use a coping mechanism she’s developed over the years on me. Whenever she has very heavy feelings about a situational thing (i.e. something that she has no control of or any outlet for, like a cherished pet dying, where she can’t blame or attack anyone but still creates heavy feelings), she doesn’t seem to know how to work through those feelings in a healthy way and ends up holding onto them until they pile up. Her way of coping, then, is to latch onto any problem she can find from me (or anyone else in the way, but typically just me), blow up that problem as big as she can, then try to shove all her feelings into that problem by attacking or emotionally abusing me. And, if that problem is too small to justify all those feelings, then she will pull in any problem she can from the past – small problems, large problems, unresolved problems, resolved problems, things to do with me, or even things that have nothing to do with me. She’ll then take those issues and continue adding it to the base problem until she feels like she’s offloaded all her feelings and can move on. I’ve attempted to tell her about the coping mechanism a few times in the past, but when she started using the fact that I wanted to talk about a problem to use her coping mechanism on me, I stopped trying to bring it up.
So, with these two main issues, things can be an emotional rollercoaster. I feel like I’m chained up in a corner, where sometimes she comes over to really love and care about me, and other times she stops by just to emotionally beat me. I feel so extremely alone, all the time. But, what makes it worse is that I know it’s not really her fault. She’s getting the help she needs and is actively working on her issues. She feels remorse whenever I’m able to talk with her about these issues, and tries her best to support me when she’s doing well. If she wasn’t actively trying to fix the issues, or didn’t accept responsibility for her actions, I would likely be okay just walking away. But, she needs a support system. She needs someone there to help her or she will never get better. It’s like there are two very distinct people I’m married to – one that is loving, kind, appreciative, and supportive, and the other is angry, spiteful, and abusive. And, I know if I walk away from the abusive side of her, I have to abandon the side of her that I love, and that’s just not something I’m willing to do. She deserves support just as much as anyone else, but it’s just so extremely hard, all the time.
I will say, I was able to very recently get her to accept couple’s therapy. I know it’s going to be tricky because she has actively tried to discredit my therapists in the past when they say things she doesn’t agree with. So, I know if we get a couple’s therapist that she doesn’t have some kind of default trust in, there’s the risk she will fall into that mindset again. She does fully trust her therapist at this point, so I asked her to get a recommendation from him in an attempt to create some default trust in whomever we end up seeing together. Today is her next therapy session, so hopefully she comes back with a name and contact information for us to set up our first session. I sincerely wish we didn’t have to do couple’s therapy because most insurances don’t cover couple’s, which means I have to pay out of pocket with money I don’t have. But, the alternative is just remain chained up in the corner with no end in sight, and I just don’t think I have it in me to continue this cycle without entirely just falling apart.
I’m so sorry for the long post. I’m sorry for anyone that made it this far, but thank you for any support you can provide. I don’t want to leave her. I want to support her as much as I can, and hopefully couple’s therapy finally makes things better. But, for now, I feel so extremely alone, so thank you for hearing me out. I hope you all have a wonderful day.

submitted by _for_support to BPDlovedones [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:27 Consistent_Storm1326 Experiencing my first heart break at 26, I’m a late bloomer with OCD, what do I do?

What do I do? I’m a late bloomer and I’m struggling with this
After spending a few days working on this, there has been some progress. To summarize: I've been dating this girl for 9 months. About a month ago, I confessed my love for her, but she didn't say it back, instead expressing affection in other ways. A couple of weeks later, she ghosted me for a weekend, apologized, and we had a conversation. During that conversation, I went to her place seeking comfort because one of my friends had passed away. That's when she mentioned she wasn't sure about continuing the relationship because our feelings weren't on the same level. We agreed to give it another month, and that week was amazing. However, now she's ghosting me again, but for a longer period. We talked on Monday, but this time, I've been feeling limited in what I can say. I haven't reached out since, and it's been radio silence. She mentioned that her grandmother in the UK is getting worse and she's been reconsidering our relationship. She's been dismissive lately.
I've been working every day for the past two months and doing therapy for a few weeks. I've lost 40 pounds due to a lack of appetite, but I'm coping. Physically, I'm getting stronger, but mentally, it's tough. I'm tempted to send a voice note just to check in and let her know I'm here. I've done a lot for her, like making her birthdays, Valentine's Day, and Christmas special, and she was good to me at some point.
On the bright side, I've been doing well for myself. I recently styled an MLB player, got sponsored, and was interviewed for Style Canada, but I still can't find happiness.
During therapy on Monday, I was crying and asked my therapist for advice. She couldn't tell me what to do, but she suggested I block her on TikTok and Instagram, where she often posted about her social life, which made it harder for me to move on. She'd be partying while I was here crying, and it felt like she was trying to compete with me since she wants to start taking content creation seriously. I have a big following already and offered help, but she declined.
The reason it's been hard for me to let go is because she showed me how to have fun and be myself. We went to many concerts and had late-night adventures together. She was also my first sexual partner at 26 years old and the first girl to make my birthday special.
Blocking her felt like a weight lifted off my shoulders, and it feels like life is just beginning now.
The last time we talked was on Wednesday when I saw her. She barely kissed me and wasn't "feeling it." I even got her food and flowers. She said she was meeting a guy friend and looked excited, which made me jealous because she's been avoiding dates with me. She said she'd try on a dress I made for her that night but later messaged me saying she was going to bed because she finished her tasks late. I said okay and left it to her to message me, but I haven't heard from her yet.
I was the first guy to meet her mom and she met my family. Then, one day she went cold turkey. She said she had love for me but wasn't in love with me and that since she never been in a relationship she had nothing to base it on (which I didn’t buy). She also said that she came from a broken home and can't give me what I want, but at the beginning, she said she could (I want what my parents have; they've been together for 35+ years with strong faith).
How do you guys handle this? I'm a late bloomer at 26 years old and have OCD.

submitted by Consistent_Storm1326 to MenAsk [link] [comments]

2024.05.15 17:25 Servantpublic DAE get a response from their local MP using the generic PSAC email on the 3 day mandate?

For context this is the response from Francis Drouin, Member of Parliament for Glengarry, Prescott and Russell.
Hi [name],
Thank you for reaching out in regards to this.
A per week minimum of 3 days still offers the flexibility of a hybrid work model by allowing most public servants to work from home for up to 2 days. To make sure this change can be done as smoothly as possible, there will also be a four-month lead time.
Public Services and Procurement Canada has confirmed that workplaces can accommodate this transition. With increased presence to 4 days for executives, it is expected that executives use the time spent in office efficiently and create a workplace environment that best meets the needs of their teams and supports high productivity.
We have and will also continue to prioritize our ongoing relationships with unions. Our government has met on several occasions with union leaders from across the public service to discuss issues of concern.
Additionally, the Direction on prescribed presence in the workplace and the Directive on telework are distinct from each other and neither is part of the collective agreements. The Treasury Board of Canada(TBS) continues to work with several bargaining agents to respect the commitments made in the letters of agreement signed in 2023, outside of collective agreements, to establish joint consultation committees to review the Directive on telework to ensure it reflects an evolving operational context. Together, TBS and the relevant bargaining agents have agreed to work towards concluding consultations one year from the initial meeting, which is on track for fall/winter 2024-2025.
I understand this can be a big change for many but rest assured that we remain focused on delivering high quality services to Canadians while accommodating the public service as best we can.
Thanks again for sharing your thoughts and concerns with me.
——
I notice he mentions 4 month lead time - some of us didn’t get that. My team was told 3 days a week the week after it was announced.

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2024.05.15 17:24 adriancha En vivo modo carrera pes efootball 24 UEFA Champions League Real Madrid Barcelona Manchester city

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