Long span pergolas
BookTV on Reddit
2019.09.08 21:13 ShivasRightFoot BookTV on Reddit
BookTV, 48 hours of nonfiction books on TV, every weekend on CSPAN2, discussion on Reddit all week long.
2008.01.25 07:36 Humor
For all things funny!
2012.05.26 04:52 mrautomatic17 r/10SecondsOrLess
**VIDEOS VIDEOS AND MORE VIDEOS!** * Do you love short videos? * Do you have the attention span of a two year old? * Do you like to hit it and quit it? If you answered yes to any of these questions then you have found your subreddit! This is a place to make us laugh, cry, frown, smile, or even vomit. The only rule? Videos have to be **under 10 seconds.** NSFL AND NSFW ARE ALLOWED BUT NO PORN
2024.05.14 04:46 nothingnicetosay92 it’s been 3 months
and that span of 90 days feels simultaneously like a blink of an eye and the length of an eternity. I watched my mom exit this realm after a 15-month battle with pancreatic cancer.
The last 4 months of her life were intense. I don’t live in the same town as my parents, so I was traveling every week. As each week passed, the journey became more daunting- her condition was rapidly deteriorating. My dad, my grandparents, my partner and I were all there consistently. It might take a village to raise a child but it also takes a village to help someone transition into death. My aunt and uncle made the 10-hour journey twice during her last two months. We were there for her and we cared for her and we fought with her, the whole time. She wasn’t alone, although she may have felt it. She didn’t share her feelings much.
Now some time has passed and the lasting and permanent effects of this death on my father and I are showing…
I still visit, every other week. I spend my days off here, which, consequently, are my dad’s work days. But we watch television in the evening and we talk about mom. He tells me that he doesn’t have much will to live and with our ever-present hereditary cancers, he believes that cancer will be his way of death also. He tells me that if it comes to that, he won’t fight hard, if at all. That if cancer doesn’t come, he hopes he doesn’t live a long time because he can’t handle this constant level of grief and loneliness.
How am I supposed to handle this? While I’m navigating my own complex and difficult life, I now have these thoughts to sit with. It feels unfair for him to lay that out for me, it feels like he’s telling me our relationship and seeing my life through isn’t important enough for him to stay alive for. How do I convince him to find reasons to still live? He needs to learn ways to live for himself, and if that’s not already engrained, how does someone begin to do that? He’s been to therapy a few times since she passed (I haven’t, but need to). He’s on antidepressants. I know it’s still so soon after her passing, his and my feelings will change as time goes…but what if he doesn’t adjust?
I am 31f, my dad 51. I feel like we’re both too young for this much grief.
submitted by nothingnicetosay92 to GriefSupport [link] [comments]
The last 4 months of her life were intense. I don’t live in the same town as my parents, so I was traveling every week. As each week passed, the journey became more daunting- her condition was rapidly deteriorating. My dad, my grandparents, my partner and I were all there consistently. It might take a village to raise a child but it also takes a village to help someone transition into death. My aunt and uncle made the 10-hour journey twice during her last two months. We were there for her and we cared for her and we fought with her, the whole time. She wasn’t alone, although she may have felt it. She didn’t share her feelings much.
Now some time has passed and the lasting and permanent effects of this death on my father and I are showing…
I still visit, every other week. I spend my days off here, which, consequently, are my dad’s work days. But we watch television in the evening and we talk about mom. He tells me that he doesn’t have much will to live and with our ever-present hereditary cancers, he believes that cancer will be his way of death also. He tells me that if it comes to that, he won’t fight hard, if at all. That if cancer doesn’t come, he hopes he doesn’t live a long time because he can’t handle this constant level of grief and loneliness.
How am I supposed to handle this? While I’m navigating my own complex and difficult life, I now have these thoughts to sit with. It feels unfair for him to lay that out for me, it feels like he’s telling me our relationship and seeing my life through isn’t important enough for him to stay alive for. How do I convince him to find reasons to still live? He needs to learn ways to live for himself, and if that’s not already engrained, how does someone begin to do that? He’s been to therapy a few times since she passed (I haven’t, but need to). He’s on antidepressants. I know it’s still so soon after her passing, his and my feelings will change as time goes…but what if he doesn’t adjust?
I am 31f, my dad 51. I feel like we’re both too young for this much grief.
2024.05.14 04:40 No_Run2919 Grand Campaign
We just completed a four year long campaign that started in the Clone Wars and ended with the destruction of the first Death Star. I will be doing a sequel campaign to rap up loose ends.
I want to Start a Grand Campaign that spans all eras, and I would love some ideas on some plot points for the High Republic Era!
May The Force Be With You!!
submitted by No_Run2919 to swrpg [link] [comments]
I want to Start a Grand Campaign that spans all eras, and I would love some ideas on some plot points for the High Republic Era!
May The Force Be With You!!
2024.05.14 04:17 P0RTERHAUS What the hell just happened at my EMU discharge?
So. Recently posted about my EMU visit, how anxious I was that I'd get smacked with a hysteria diagnosis. I had a lot of stuff happen. Most interestingly, in my second sleep deprivation day (basically self-administered, might I add), I had some pretty intense episodes. One of them I fell into some kind of microsleep and emerged extremely sexually aroused, which I was able to identify as the same feeling as my sexsomnia which baffled a sleep doctor. Another one, during sleep dep, I felt this profound and abnormal sense of mental clarity, got excited, felt aggressive, almost like I took amphetamines, faintly hypomanic, and had an extremely intense visual aura with my migraine symptoms an hour or two afterwards, along with a host of my typical seizure symptoms and impairment, though without headache. My final one, after being up for 32 hours, I slept for about two and woke up still dreaming, with extremely impaired awareness, confused as hell, feeling like I was in danger, not able to make sense of what was happening, didn't know where I was, and took about ten or fifteen minutes to return to awareness, typical of what I suspect to be nocturnal seizures I have. Despite getting all of these, by the second or third day they had already told me this was PNES, they weren't catching any epileptiform discharges. I sort of figured this would happen. Whatever.
This part may be ever so slightly out of order, because I didn't record it. Not a mistake I'm ever going to make again. I'm going off my memory, and the memory of a family member who was there and agrees this is what happened.
Today, I'm getting discharged. A doctor I'd never seen comes in. Don't remember her name. She tells me that because there was no epileptiform activity it's PNES and that I need to see a therapist for treatment. I start to have a conversation with her, saying that feels a little "circular" because my three mental health providers told me to pursue neurological care, and that I'd been receiving mental healthcare for twenty years with no improvement. I'm working towards having a conversation with her about how some epilepsy, like TLE and FLE, may not actually present on an EEG. Before I get there, she asks me what symptoms I have that make me think it's epilepsy. Give her a brief rundown of my history, which she didn't know at all despite the fact that I gave some decent history the day I was admitted. Talk about sleep issues I had, all these psychiatric diagnoses I got which didn't do anything, how I couldn't function as a kid and my life fell apart. I mention, among my symptoms that make me think I specifically have TLE, dissociation is one of the most significant ones. I think among this she asked what my triggers are, and as I mention THC is one, she laughs and interrupts me loudly saying "well that should be easy to avoid!" and I try to say alcohol is also a trigger, but I'm pretty sure she spoke over me. She says that the dissociation is a sign of the mental health issues that would be causing my seizures. I say the dissociation precedes the events which caused my mental health issues and begin to describe childhood experiences that make me think it's epilepsy. She seems a bit blindsided by this. She moves on to say it actually isn't PNES but instead it's that I'm hypersensitive to minute changes in my body that other people wouldn't be aware of. This is something I agree with, I mention that I'm able to zero in on really fine stuff and I've spent the last couple years not taking anything for granted and noting all the strange sensory experiences I get. She suggests biofeedback therapy, I tell her I have a long history of neurofeedback therapy and it didn't really help much. That my neurofeedback therapist told me my brain behaved in weird ways, looked strange on EEG, and suggested I see a neurologist about it. She seems to be getting frustrated at this point. I ask if I'm being diagnosed with PNES or not, and she says no I'm not. She says that she's not telling me it's all in my head, or that it's psychological, but that it's sensory things I'm just noticing too strongly. I believe at this point, my dad chimes in and says that I was diagnosed with autism as a child, that I had sensory issues which overwhelmed me. Which, might I add, pissed me off. The doctor seems relieved, leans into that and says that's what would cause me to be oversensitive to sensations. I mention some of my lifelong sensory issues, largely tingles that climb up my spine and make my shoulder jerk, or cold chills that wrap around my head. I mention that I've grown to be very tolerant of my sensory issues, and that the symptoms that concern me are my episodes of memory loss, emerging from sleep in bizarre altered states of consciousness, motor symptoms, and primarily the cognitive issues I have. I emphasize how I'm unable to drive. She then says it's my sleep. She says it's a sleep disorder that's causing all of this and that I need to get a sleep study. When going over my history I emphasized that I had sleep issues as a kid, especially with emerging from sleep and with daytime sleepiness (one of the things that makes me suspect TLE!) and have already had multiple sleep studies which showed nothing, but that I have another one scheduled. She seemed to grab onto that, saying yeah that's definitely what it is, make sure to get to that, and quickly changed subjects and asked me about 10,000IU doses of vitamin D I'd been taking, asking if that was from my PCP. Now. I'm seeing an endocrinologist to treat hypogonadotropic hypogonadism which I have had probably forever, none of my T tests were within range for my age going back to my early 20s and I had symptoms since I was a teenager, and it's just gotten worse in tandem with my suspect epilepsy. I have read several papers which say hypogonadotropic hypogonadism is a condition which presents with TLE in a fashion that is clinically significant, drawing links. I believe some say it's an outright symptom. I say to her "That's from my endocrinologist, actually, and that's one of the things that I'd like to mention which made me think this was TLE--." I am abruptly interrupted. Through an obviously frustrated smile, toothy and saccharine, this doctor interjects to emphatically say "Which it isn't! haha It's not epilepsy!" and continues to say she's going to write this up and send it to my doctor. I sort of checked out at that point, frankly. I don't remember it very well, but she left the room shortly after. So, she didn't read any of my history, didn't read any of my notes I gestured to, didn't give me an opportunity to discuss things I have concerns over, and eventually got frustrated enough to simply interrupt me altogether in order to put her foot down. Tells me to move forward by attending an upcoming sleep study. Whole thing very clearly felt like the doc trying to reverse-engineer some bullshit excuse to justify the conclusion that I just have hysteria, more or less, regardless of what the actual truth of the matter is.
A little while later, I get my discharge packet. One of the very helpful nurses shows me the "patient communication" section in the packet and says this is what she said to my doctor. I find this interesting, but I'm too pissed off to dive right into it. Eventually, after spending a while bitching to my dad about how weird this is once we're alone, I take a look at it. She wrote: "Some of your spells are consistent with psychogenic non-epileptic events. The recommended treatment is therapy focused on identifying and coping with psychological stressors. Please follow up with psychology as an outpatient. Other spells are more likely due to hypervigilance of normal physiologic symptoms." She had explicitly told me she is not diagnosing me with PNES when I asked her earlier. What she ended the conversation on, after I provided context to my history of care (which I specifically mentioned previously and she had absolutely no awareness of) explicitly telling me it's not PNES and that it is a sleep disorder I'm experiencing. Another point in this packet highlights that, according to Minnesota state law, I cannot legally drive for three months following any event with a loss of awareness or voluntary control. Which she actively disregarded in order to settle on each of the four or five different diagnoses she offered before settling on telling me it's a sleep disorder.
I have a followup with the epileptologist who ordered this EMU study. I'm sharpening my swords, so to speak, and trying to find as much substantiative evidence as I can through studies and what resources I can find to explain why it is I suspect I have TLE. I'm finding a lot! I'm more convinced than I ever was this is, in fact, lifelong TLE which has been very difficult to diagnose. I'm reaching out to previous mental health professionals who urged me to seek neurological care to back me up, reaching out to my other providers, and I'm going to begin looking for another epileptologist just in case. But I'm really, really kicking myself for not recording this discussion like I've been meaning to do with all my communiques with doctors. Wondering if I should try to initiate some kind of administrative action against this particular doctor.
The strange thing is the doctor who was interpreting my EEG, different woman, spoke to me several times. She had told me on the second and third days that there were no evident epileptiform waves during my episodes. I would like to add that my blood pressure shot up like fucking crazy during these, and my eyes were always open during them, and it sounds like PNES is typically with eyes closed and causes far less heart rate and blood pressure variability than epilepsy does. Just as an aside. But I mention to her that I'm aware of some kinds of epilepsy which sometimes don't show up on EEG, specifically temporal lobe and frontal lobe, because they happen deeper in the brain. She says yes, that is true, explains a little bit of it to me, but says that this is the gold standard of diagnosis at the moment, with our current technology. We spoke a little about how I have almost 20 years of mental health care under my belt, how circular this all feels. She was sympathetic and laid this out as: as per our technology, VEEG is currently the gold standard of epilepsy diagnosis. According to this gold standard of diagnosis, I do not have epilepsy. Given my history, it would be reasonable to conclude that my issue is not psychological either, and that I'm just unfortunately in a "gray spot." Which I did admire, even if I didn't have a chance to totally voice my concerns, and felt it was sort of bullshit.
So! If anyone in Minneapolis knows an epileptologist to look out for, that would be cool, I guess! Or maybe a lawyer! Who knows! Not really sure what to do with any of this! Because what the hell! Would appreciate any input at all or tips on how to actually get somebody to read my fucking chart in the first place, let alone the notes I shove in their face, and listen to what I have to say. Because this only made me more convinced this is epilepsy, and goddamn I need care ASAP.
p.s. do you guys think i might, maybe, perhaps, a smidge, present the hypergraphic compulsion to write with this two thousand words of bullshit i just hammered out and didn't proofread or anything? lmao. sorry!
tl;dr: doctor i never saw prior rotated through several different diagnoses in the span of a single conversation, obviously did not read any of my history, ignored my notes, interrupted me when I tried to explain concerns, landed on telling me it was a sleep disorder, and then soft-diagnosed me with PNES when she explicitly said it's not PNES and she isn't diagnosing me with PNES
submitted by P0RTERHAUS to Epilepsy [link] [comments]
This part may be ever so slightly out of order, because I didn't record it. Not a mistake I'm ever going to make again. I'm going off my memory, and the memory of a family member who was there and agrees this is what happened.
Today, I'm getting discharged. A doctor I'd never seen comes in. Don't remember her name. She tells me that because there was no epileptiform activity it's PNES and that I need to see a therapist for treatment. I start to have a conversation with her, saying that feels a little "circular" because my three mental health providers told me to pursue neurological care, and that I'd been receiving mental healthcare for twenty years with no improvement. I'm working towards having a conversation with her about how some epilepsy, like TLE and FLE, may not actually present on an EEG. Before I get there, she asks me what symptoms I have that make me think it's epilepsy. Give her a brief rundown of my history, which she didn't know at all despite the fact that I gave some decent history the day I was admitted. Talk about sleep issues I had, all these psychiatric diagnoses I got which didn't do anything, how I couldn't function as a kid and my life fell apart. I mention, among my symptoms that make me think I specifically have TLE, dissociation is one of the most significant ones. I think among this she asked what my triggers are, and as I mention THC is one, she laughs and interrupts me loudly saying "well that should be easy to avoid!" and I try to say alcohol is also a trigger, but I'm pretty sure she spoke over me. She says that the dissociation is a sign of the mental health issues that would be causing my seizures. I say the dissociation precedes the events which caused my mental health issues and begin to describe childhood experiences that make me think it's epilepsy. She seems a bit blindsided by this. She moves on to say it actually isn't PNES but instead it's that I'm hypersensitive to minute changes in my body that other people wouldn't be aware of. This is something I agree with, I mention that I'm able to zero in on really fine stuff and I've spent the last couple years not taking anything for granted and noting all the strange sensory experiences I get. She suggests biofeedback therapy, I tell her I have a long history of neurofeedback therapy and it didn't really help much. That my neurofeedback therapist told me my brain behaved in weird ways, looked strange on EEG, and suggested I see a neurologist about it. She seems to be getting frustrated at this point. I ask if I'm being diagnosed with PNES or not, and she says no I'm not. She says that she's not telling me it's all in my head, or that it's psychological, but that it's sensory things I'm just noticing too strongly. I believe at this point, my dad chimes in and says that I was diagnosed with autism as a child, that I had sensory issues which overwhelmed me. Which, might I add, pissed me off. The doctor seems relieved, leans into that and says that's what would cause me to be oversensitive to sensations. I mention some of my lifelong sensory issues, largely tingles that climb up my spine and make my shoulder jerk, or cold chills that wrap around my head. I mention that I've grown to be very tolerant of my sensory issues, and that the symptoms that concern me are my episodes of memory loss, emerging from sleep in bizarre altered states of consciousness, motor symptoms, and primarily the cognitive issues I have. I emphasize how I'm unable to drive. She then says it's my sleep. She says it's a sleep disorder that's causing all of this and that I need to get a sleep study. When going over my history I emphasized that I had sleep issues as a kid, especially with emerging from sleep and with daytime sleepiness (one of the things that makes me suspect TLE!) and have already had multiple sleep studies which showed nothing, but that I have another one scheduled. She seemed to grab onto that, saying yeah that's definitely what it is, make sure to get to that, and quickly changed subjects and asked me about 10,000IU doses of vitamin D I'd been taking, asking if that was from my PCP. Now. I'm seeing an endocrinologist to treat hypogonadotropic hypogonadism which I have had probably forever, none of my T tests were within range for my age going back to my early 20s and I had symptoms since I was a teenager, and it's just gotten worse in tandem with my suspect epilepsy. I have read several papers which say hypogonadotropic hypogonadism is a condition which presents with TLE in a fashion that is clinically significant, drawing links. I believe some say it's an outright symptom. I say to her "That's from my endocrinologist, actually, and that's one of the things that I'd like to mention which made me think this was TLE--." I am abruptly interrupted. Through an obviously frustrated smile, toothy and saccharine, this doctor interjects to emphatically say "Which it isn't! haha It's not epilepsy!" and continues to say she's going to write this up and send it to my doctor. I sort of checked out at that point, frankly. I don't remember it very well, but she left the room shortly after. So, she didn't read any of my history, didn't read any of my notes I gestured to, didn't give me an opportunity to discuss things I have concerns over, and eventually got frustrated enough to simply interrupt me altogether in order to put her foot down. Tells me to move forward by attending an upcoming sleep study. Whole thing very clearly felt like the doc trying to reverse-engineer some bullshit excuse to justify the conclusion that I just have hysteria, more or less, regardless of what the actual truth of the matter is.
A little while later, I get my discharge packet. One of the very helpful nurses shows me the "patient communication" section in the packet and says this is what she said to my doctor. I find this interesting, but I'm too pissed off to dive right into it. Eventually, after spending a while bitching to my dad about how weird this is once we're alone, I take a look at it. She wrote: "Some of your spells are consistent with psychogenic non-epileptic events. The recommended treatment is therapy focused on identifying and coping with psychological stressors. Please follow up with psychology as an outpatient. Other spells are more likely due to hypervigilance of normal physiologic symptoms." She had explicitly told me she is not diagnosing me with PNES when I asked her earlier. What she ended the conversation on, after I provided context to my history of care (which I specifically mentioned previously and she had absolutely no awareness of) explicitly telling me it's not PNES and that it is a sleep disorder I'm experiencing. Another point in this packet highlights that, according to Minnesota state law, I cannot legally drive for three months following any event with a loss of awareness or voluntary control. Which she actively disregarded in order to settle on each of the four or five different diagnoses she offered before settling on telling me it's a sleep disorder.
I have a followup with the epileptologist who ordered this EMU study. I'm sharpening my swords, so to speak, and trying to find as much substantiative evidence as I can through studies and what resources I can find to explain why it is I suspect I have TLE. I'm finding a lot! I'm more convinced than I ever was this is, in fact, lifelong TLE which has been very difficult to diagnose. I'm reaching out to previous mental health professionals who urged me to seek neurological care to back me up, reaching out to my other providers, and I'm going to begin looking for another epileptologist just in case. But I'm really, really kicking myself for not recording this discussion like I've been meaning to do with all my communiques with doctors. Wondering if I should try to initiate some kind of administrative action against this particular doctor.
The strange thing is the doctor who was interpreting my EEG, different woman, spoke to me several times. She had told me on the second and third days that there were no evident epileptiform waves during my episodes. I would like to add that my blood pressure shot up like fucking crazy during these, and my eyes were always open during them, and it sounds like PNES is typically with eyes closed and causes far less heart rate and blood pressure variability than epilepsy does. Just as an aside. But I mention to her that I'm aware of some kinds of epilepsy which sometimes don't show up on EEG, specifically temporal lobe and frontal lobe, because they happen deeper in the brain. She says yes, that is true, explains a little bit of it to me, but says that this is the gold standard of diagnosis at the moment, with our current technology. We spoke a little about how I have almost 20 years of mental health care under my belt, how circular this all feels. She was sympathetic and laid this out as: as per our technology, VEEG is currently the gold standard of epilepsy diagnosis. According to this gold standard of diagnosis, I do not have epilepsy. Given my history, it would be reasonable to conclude that my issue is not psychological either, and that I'm just unfortunately in a "gray spot." Which I did admire, even if I didn't have a chance to totally voice my concerns, and felt it was sort of bullshit.
So! If anyone in Minneapolis knows an epileptologist to look out for, that would be cool, I guess! Or maybe a lawyer! Who knows! Not really sure what to do with any of this! Because what the hell! Would appreciate any input at all or tips on how to actually get somebody to read my fucking chart in the first place, let alone the notes I shove in their face, and listen to what I have to say. Because this only made me more convinced this is epilepsy, and goddamn I need care ASAP.
p.s. do you guys think i might, maybe, perhaps, a smidge, present the hypergraphic compulsion to write with this two thousand words of bullshit i just hammered out and didn't proofread or anything? lmao. sorry!
tl;dr: doctor i never saw prior rotated through several different diagnoses in the span of a single conversation, obviously did not read any of my history, ignored my notes, interrupted me when I tried to explain concerns, landed on telling me it was a sleep disorder, and then soft-diagnosed me with PNES when she explicitly said it's not PNES and she isn't diagnosing me with PNES
2024.05.14 04:16 LaptopDealsTM 🎮💻 (May 2024 Updated List) The Best Mid Range & Budget Gaming Laptops + The Best Video Editing, Professional & Student Laptops! 📚
Hey All, A new month is upon us and I've compiled a carefully curated selection of top-notch laptops spanning various categories (Top Performance RTX 40 series, Mid Range & Budget Gaming Laptops+ Video Editing, Professional & Student Laptops). While reviewing this list in search of a new laptop, Please don't hesitate to inquire or propose any laptops you believe deserve a spot in these categories. You can leave a comment in the comment section to the bottom section of the page.
✨📌💻✨ ACTIVE LAPTOP DEALS✨📌✨
General Use Laptop Deals
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Gaming & Productivity Laptop Deals
NB: Gaming Laptops are also great choices for editing, rendering, and heavy productivity tasks due to the power of the GPU, speed of the CPU and the quality display of the screen they posess.
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📌✨ Recommended Listings For: Video Editing & Content Creation Student Laptops 📌✨
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📌✨ Recommended Listings For: Student, Professional & General Use Laptops 📌✨
submitted by LaptopDealsTM to LaptopDeals [link] [comments]
✨📌💻✨ ACTIVE LAPTOP DEALS✨📌✨
General Use Laptop Deals
| Name & Link | Specifications | Prices |
|---|---|---|
| Lenovo IdeaPad Slim 3 | Ryzen 3 7320U, 8 GB RAM, 256 GB SSD, 1080p 15.6" Display | $299.99 |
| HP 15-ef2015nr laptop | 15.6" (1920 x 1080) FHD IPS Display - AMD Ryzen 5 5500U, AMD Radeon Graphics, 16GB RAM, 512GB SSD | $339.99 |
| HP 15 15-fc0010nr (2023) Laptop | FHD Display, AMD Ryzen 3 7320U, 8GB RAM, 256GB SSD, AMD Radeon Graphics, Windows 11 Home | $363.49 |
| Lenovo IdeaPad 1i | 15.6", Intel Core i5-1235U, 8GB RAM, 512 GB SSD, Cloud Grey, Windows 11. | $379 |
| ASUS Vivobook 16 | 16” WUXGA (1920X1200) 16:10 Display, AMD Ryzen™ 5 5625U, AMD Radeon™ Graphics, 8GB RAM, 512GB SSD, Fingerprint Sensor, Windows 11 Home | $442 |
| ASUS Vivobook Go 15 | 15.6” FHD Display, AMD Ryzen 5 7520U Processor, 8GB RAM, 512GB SSD, Windows 11 Home | $489 |
| ASUS Vivobook 16" Laptop | Intel i7-1255U, 16GB RAM, 512GB SSD, FHD+ 16" Display | $499 |
| Dell Inspiron 15 3530 Laptop | Intel i5-1335U, 16 GB RAM, 512 GB SSD, 1080p 15.6″ 120Hz Display | $580.77 |
| Samsung Galaxy Book3 | 15" Laptop (2023): Intel i5-1335U, 16GB RAM, 256GB SSD, 1080p 15.6" Display. | $579.99 |
| ASUS VivoBook 16 Laptop | 16” WUXGA (1920 x 1200) 16:10 Display, AMD Ryzen 9 7940HS, AMD Radeon™ Graphics, 16GB RAM, 1TB SSD, Windows 11 Home | $694.49 |
| ASUS Vivobook S 15 Laptop | Intel Ultra 7 155H, 16 GB RAM, 1 TB SSD, 2.8K 15.6" 120Hz OLED Display | $749 |
| ASUS ZenBook 14 Laptop | 14" FHD+ (1920x1200, WUXGA+) 16:10, 60Hz, 400-nits, 500-nits HDR, 100% DCI-P3, Pen Support, Glossy Touch, OLED Display, Core Ultra 7 155H, Intel Arc Graphics (8 X Cores), 16GB DDR5 RAM, 1TB SSD. | $799.99 |
| Acer Swift Go 14 Intel Evo Thin & Light Laptop | 14" WUXGA (1920 x 1200) IPS Touchscreen, Intel Ultra 7 Processor 155H, Intel ARC, 16GB RAM, 512GB SSD, Win11 Home | $799.99 |
| Lenovo IdeaPad Pro 5i | 16" Laptop: Intel i7-13700H, RTX 3050, 16GB RAM, 1TB SSD, QHD+ 16" 120Hz IPS Display | $799.99 |
| Acer Swift Go 14 Laptop | Intel Ultra 7 155H, 16GB RAM, 1TB SSD, 2.8K 14" OLED 90Hz Display. | $799.99 |
| Apple 2022 MacBook Air Laptop with M2 chip | 13.6-inch Liquid Retina Display, 8GB RAM, 256GB SSD Storage, Backlit Keyboard, 1080p FaceTime HD Camera. Works with iPhone and iPad; Midnight. | $849 |
| ASUS VivoBook S 14 | 14", FHD+ (1920 x 1200, WUXGA+) 16:10, 60Hz, 400-nits, 600-nits HDR, OLED Display, Intel Core Ultra 9 185H, 16GB LPDDR5 RAM, 1TB SSD | $899.99 |
| HP Envy x360 15 inch Laptop | FHD Display, Intel Core i7-1355U, 16 GB RAM, 1 TB SSD, Intel Iris Xe Graphics, Windows 11 Home, 15-ew1199nr (2023),Silver | $919.99 |
Gaming & Productivity Laptop Deals
| Name & Link | Specifications | Prices |
|---|---|---|
| ASUS ROG Flow X13 Touchscreen Gaming Laptop | 13.4" FHD+ (1920 x 1200, WUXGA+) 16:10, 120Hz 7ms, 500-nits, 100% sRGB, IPS Touch Display, Ryzen 9 7940HS, AMD Radeon 780M, 16GB DDR5 RAM, 512GB SSD. | $749.99 |
| ASUS TUF A16 Gaming Laptop | 16" 165Hz FHD (1920x1080) Display, AMD Ryzen 7 7735HS, Radeon RX7700S, 16GB DDR5 RAM, 512GB SSD, Windows 11 Home. | $749.99 |
| HP Victus | 15.6" FHD 144Hz, Intel i5-12500H, RTX 4060, 16GB RAM, 512GB SSD | $799 |
| Lenovo IdeaPad Pro 5i | 16" Laptop: Intel i7-13700H, RTX 3050, 16GB RAM, 1TB SSD, QHD+ 16" 120Hz IPS Display. | $796 |
| Acer Swift X SFX14-41G-R1S6 Creator Laptop | 14″ Full HD 100% sRGB, AMD Ryzen 7 5800U, NVIDIA RTX 3050Ti Laptop GPU, 16GB LPDDR4X, 512GB SSD, Wi-Fi 6, Backlit KB, Amazon Alexa, Windows 10 Home | $851 |
| Lenovo Legion Slim 5 Gaming Laptop | 16" FHD+ (1920x1200, WUXGA+) 16:10, 144Hz, 300-nits, IPS Display, Ryzen 5 7640HS, RTX 4060 (100W), 16GB DDR5 RAM, 512GB SSD. | $899.99 |
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2024.05.14 04:06 BrieflyBlue Vintage stamps
 | I bought a bag of old, used stamps for $6 at Goodwill. All the non-USA stamps are featured in picture #1 and all the coolest USA stamps (in my opinion) are in picture #2. submitted by BrieflyBlue to postcrossing [link] [comments] These aren’t all the stamps, though. I left out a lot because they were mostly generic American flag designs. The dinosaurs are a particular favorite of mine. We can send old stamps, right? As long as we also include proper postage? I know a lot of people like vintage designs. The pictured stamps span from the 1940s through the 1980s. |
2024.05.14 03:25 Showknight_ Is it just one?
 | Hi folks, I think I found a BB on my bed two weeks ago the day before I was supposed to visit a friend out of town. I was washing my bedding and saw a bug crawling on my mattress. I took a picture of it and then killed it and wrapped it in two garbages bags before throwing it out. I noticed two bites in the span of the week prior to finding the bug. I vacuumed my bedroom, washed and dried all my clothes on high heat and stored them in plastic bins or garbage bags. I told my friend about the situation and decided to take precautions and visit them (I showered and washed and dried everything in my suitcase upon arrival). I didn’t notice any bites while I was away. When I was away my mom and sister checked their rooms and my room and found nothing. My mom checked my room once a day. submitted by Showknight_ to Bedbugs [link] [comments] I have now returned from my trip. I’ve since steamed my bed frame and mattress, floors, and the trim of my bedroom but I’m terrified there’s more of them. I slept in my room my first night back from my trip but the anxiety was debilitating, so I started sleeping in the basement. I go in my bedroom everyday to check my mattress and room but I can’t bring myself to sleep in there. I can’t tell if I have new bites or not from the first night sleeping in there (the bites I got initially were circular with a dark punctured centre, the new ones look like whitehead pimples on my leg). I can’t call a professional to check. Also for context: I have a long commute on public transport to get to and from work, so I suspect I got it from there. Any words or advice or support would be greatly appreciated. I can barely eat or sleep. |
2024.05.14 03:17 throwaway4heartqs How should I approach this fleeting chest pain thing
It's not currently an emergency. 35, male, in the US. Thanks for reading my novel, I've tried to cover everything. TLDR I _think_ I'm pretty healthy, but I've been having a few pangs of chest pain that are out of the normal for me.
I've had no health problems as an adult other than seasonal allergies, common colds, and I got covid twice (after vaccination but everybody's a statistic eventually). My BMI has been 23-29 as an adult, recently closer to 23 because I got into bicycling and I do it around 15 hours per week for both commuting and exercise. I've never smoked cigarettes or used drugs harder than marijuana. I socially drink alcohol two to three nights a week but not to the point of feeling unwell the next morning. I take a multivitamin daily, a Claritin daily during allergy season i.e. now, and I eat vegetables when I see them but otherwise don't closely monitor my diet. One parent survived a heart attack in their 60s, no other family heart problem history.
My concern: a couple weeks ago, while I was out on a long brisk walk of around 2 hours, I felt a single beat of pain in my left chest, around where my heart is. That's happened maybe three times before in my life, and it wasn't overwhelming pain, but it naturally occupies all of your attention when something like that happens in that region, where I normally feel nothing. I didn't experience any spreading pain, didn't feel dehydrated, and was able to carry on with the walk. My smartwatch said my heart rate then was around 115 (it's 65-ish resting).
Normally, no harm, no foul, but the next day, on another long walk, the same thing happened: a beat of pained panic with a very definite but not overpowering or sharp pain point, centered on the left chest, then I'm able to continue normally. It didn't happen again for several days after that, and I haven't noticed it during anything more intense like bicycling. I did feel another one yesterday, Sunday, that lasted around twice as long as the previous ones, again during a long walk. This is certainly the first time in my life I've experienced multiple of these in a short time span. I felt generally shitty yesterday but my HR and blood pressure were both normal when I checked them. Feeling fine again today.
I figure I should "get this checked out," but I don't even know where to begin. I haven't had a primary care doc since childhood and I'm currently on a self-granted long break between jobs in a stressful industry so no traditional health insurance.
What info have I left out? What tests should I ask for? What kind of conditions are *probable* / should I expect based on my info? Is it fine to keep going on long walks? Anything I can do to manage the risk if I need to wait until I'm on real health insurance? Is my heart going to pop like a grape any day now?
submitted by throwaway4heartqs to AskDocs [link] [comments]
I've had no health problems as an adult other than seasonal allergies, common colds, and I got covid twice (after vaccination but everybody's a statistic eventually). My BMI has been 23-29 as an adult, recently closer to 23 because I got into bicycling and I do it around 15 hours per week for both commuting and exercise. I've never smoked cigarettes or used drugs harder than marijuana. I socially drink alcohol two to three nights a week but not to the point of feeling unwell the next morning. I take a multivitamin daily, a Claritin daily during allergy season i.e. now, and I eat vegetables when I see them but otherwise don't closely monitor my diet. One parent survived a heart attack in their 60s, no other family heart problem history.
My concern: a couple weeks ago, while I was out on a long brisk walk of around 2 hours, I felt a single beat of pain in my left chest, around where my heart is. That's happened maybe three times before in my life, and it wasn't overwhelming pain, but it naturally occupies all of your attention when something like that happens in that region, where I normally feel nothing. I didn't experience any spreading pain, didn't feel dehydrated, and was able to carry on with the walk. My smartwatch said my heart rate then was around 115 (it's 65-ish resting).
Normally, no harm, no foul, but the next day, on another long walk, the same thing happened: a beat of pained panic with a very definite but not overpowering or sharp pain point, centered on the left chest, then I'm able to continue normally. It didn't happen again for several days after that, and I haven't noticed it during anything more intense like bicycling. I did feel another one yesterday, Sunday, that lasted around twice as long as the previous ones, again during a long walk. This is certainly the first time in my life I've experienced multiple of these in a short time span. I felt generally shitty yesterday but my HR and blood pressure were both normal when I checked them. Feeling fine again today.
I figure I should "get this checked out," but I don't even know where to begin. I haven't had a primary care doc since childhood and I'm currently on a self-granted long break between jobs in a stressful industry so no traditional health insurance.
What info have I left out? What tests should I ask for? What kind of conditions are *probable* / should I expect based on my info? Is it fine to keep going on long walks? Anything I can do to manage the risk if I need to wait until I'm on real health insurance? Is my heart going to pop like a grape any day now?
2024.05.14 03:11 Godkiller4806 Starting Now
I've always lacked discipline. In school I was an unorganized under-performer. In my 20's my life appears more put together, but my lack of self control has led to multiple addiction problems. Nothing imminently life-threatening, but slow killers that are not without their immediate side effects.
Notable side effects: 1. Memory loss and short attention span. Sometimes I open a browser tab to look something up and forget to hit "search" and just move to the next app or page that comes to mind. I come back later and see the search bar and think "oh yeah I forgot about that" Mostly from social media km sure. Often times I can't keep up with conversations because I zone out. I will forget things brought up even minutes before. 2. Erectile dysfunction. Sometimes I can't get fully erect for sex. I have a new girlfriend and this was an absolute, gut-wrenching killer the first time we got intimate. 3. Intense cravings. I can hardly go a day without using the aforementioned vices. 4. Complete lack of discipline or grit. For 15 years I have geared myself up to be a quitter. I can barely stand any degree of difficulty in my life and get easily frustrated when I have to go out of my way or exert considerable mental effort. 5. Most importantly, I haven't accomplished any of goals I set for myself as a younger man. I am "behind in life" by my own standards. I don't have much to show for the last 5 years.
Not sure if anyone else has this experience, but I remember as a kid overhearing adults talking about someone they knew who "was a smoker for decades, then one day just decided to quit, cold turkey!"
I always thought that was so badass. Flipping the script on an addiction that's old enough to vote. Having the sheer willpower to take back control of your life on a dime.
However, there is a lot of evidence to suggest that the best way to build new habits and break bad ones is atomically; Making incremental, consistent changes over a long enough period of time. This method is more sustainable and realistic than breaking habits/addictions outright.
Well, fuck that. No tapering down, no baby steps, no training wheels.
I want to solve my addiction problems, I really do, but I have this fantasy of just turning everything on its head and taking back control of my life's steering wheel. Maybe it isn't sustainable, maybe i'm setting myself up for failure, but damnit i'd like to have my cake and eat it too. I'd like to see what my limits are, if I have the fortitude to fend off multiple addictions at once.
I'll document that process here.
submitted by Godkiller4806 to getdisciplined [link] [comments]
- Nicotine - cigarettes and nicotine pouches. Off and on, but mostly on and mostly cigarettes. Anywhere from 5 cigarettes a day to almost a full pack when I am smoking. With Zyns I will have a couple a day.
- Sugar - I go out of my way to buy sometime sweet everyday.
- Caffeine - specifically energy drinks. I drink 2-5 everyday
- Pornography - Everday, 2-4 times.
- Fast food - I eat out everyday, often more than once.
- Social Media scrolling - hours everyday. probably like 4+ hours all in.
- Alcohol - Not necessarily an addiction, but I drink a couple times a week just for fun, even alone.
Notable side effects: 1. Memory loss and short attention span. Sometimes I open a browser tab to look something up and forget to hit "search" and just move to the next app or page that comes to mind. I come back later and see the search bar and think "oh yeah I forgot about that" Mostly from social media km sure. Often times I can't keep up with conversations because I zone out. I will forget things brought up even minutes before. 2. Erectile dysfunction. Sometimes I can't get fully erect for sex. I have a new girlfriend and this was an absolute, gut-wrenching killer the first time we got intimate. 3. Intense cravings. I can hardly go a day without using the aforementioned vices. 4. Complete lack of discipline or grit. For 15 years I have geared myself up to be a quitter. I can barely stand any degree of difficulty in my life and get easily frustrated when I have to go out of my way or exert considerable mental effort. 5. Most importantly, I haven't accomplished any of goals I set for myself as a younger man. I am "behind in life" by my own standards. I don't have much to show for the last 5 years.
Not sure if anyone else has this experience, but I remember as a kid overhearing adults talking about someone they knew who "was a smoker for decades, then one day just decided to quit, cold turkey!"
I always thought that was so badass. Flipping the script on an addiction that's old enough to vote. Having the sheer willpower to take back control of your life on a dime.
However, there is a lot of evidence to suggest that the best way to build new habits and break bad ones is atomically; Making incremental, consistent changes over a long enough period of time. This method is more sustainable and realistic than breaking habits/addictions outright.
Well, fuck that. No tapering down, no baby steps, no training wheels.
I want to solve my addiction problems, I really do, but I have this fantasy of just turning everything on its head and taking back control of my life's steering wheel. Maybe it isn't sustainable, maybe i'm setting myself up for failure, but damnit i'd like to have my cake and eat it too. I'd like to see what my limits are, if I have the fortitude to fend off multiple addictions at once.
I'll document that process here.
2024.05.14 03:08 Chickenwingechicken my drs and all about them
🍇.+ introduction +.🍇
i know i mostly give a lot of informative based shifting posts and i absolutely love doing that, however, i also genuinely find shifting to be one of my main hobbies. and so, i decided to take it upon myself to write about and share with all of you my drs. some fandom, some based within this dr, and some all over the place!i will include scripts, relationships, personality, time, and duration. i do have some that i plan but have not yet shifted to however i am only including the ones i have shifted to as the ones i would like to shift to are just wishful thinking and not me actively trying to shift there. though, i may make a separate post about drs that i desire to shift to one day.
this post will be also talking about drs that i shifted to in the past as well going in chronological order.
side note; when i talk about time spent in dr, i mean how long i spent in it in total. when i use a date like xxxx-xxxx**, i am talking about in this time period. how long it was since i had scripted and focused on this dr for. there will be plenty of overlap here.
๋࣭ ୨🪞୧ ๋࣭ waiting room ๋࣭ ୨🪞୧ ๋࣭
november 2021 - now (with a two year break in between)time spent in dr; six months
i honestly don't use this dr as much since my forest dr is much more nicer to relax in. i never used my waiting room for its original purpose. my waiting room was small with multiple doors surrounding it. it was more cozy though some would consider it claustrophobic.
the waiting room itself was my bedroom. for context, my bedroom has a walk in closet. inside that walk in closet is my dr. inside that closet is my waiting room where it is not a closet. honestly, idk why i didn't just permashift there but i find the process of shifting to be very relaxing for me as well haha.
it still has my other drs that i used to shift to but don't anymore. i just don't open the doors to it cuz i'm too focused on two of them. one that i don't even shift to the waiting room to and one that i do shift to it.
i shifted here using the raven method the first time and later the adhd method.
𓍢ִ໋🎧♫⋆｡ k-pop dr 𓍢ִ໋🎧♫⋆｡
december 2021 - october 2022time spent in dr; five years
i have talked about this dr of mine before in a couple of comments and i think maybe a post. i haven't really blabbed about all of it. i remember about it just as a memory. i never dreamed in that reality though simply because it is hard for me to dream in this reality too and i never cared to script in 'i can dream in this reality.' however, now i make it a point to add that in.
i did not spend five years straight. it would make me too disoriented. i shifted to it consistently for a total of five years.
my k-pop group was pretty small tbh. at least compared to other groups i listen to. i scripted that i would not know who was in my group and i would find out after auditions and meeting them for the first time. we had five members and it was pretty average. it was not crazy popular but it wasn't very small either. it was one of the most successful of our record company though.
we were a mixed gender k-pop group. meaning some girls, two guys, and me, agender nonbinary. each member had a separate persona. i will give a quick run down of each member, their persona, and my relationship with them. though i was close with all of them. it's just that i was closer with some more than others.
♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡
we had me, i suppose you can call me tato since that was the name i had in that dr. i was known as the nerdy one. the smart one who would info dump and talk very formally while most of the members talked casual. i was mostly a dancer but also was good back up vocals.
my best friend was the pessimistic black cat of the group. i knew her from training and we grew close since then. i give her a five out of five on the closeness scale. her name was ga-young. she is a tan skinned korean girl. she was dancer and singer.
the bubbly girl. she sometimes acted bratty for the sake of cuteness. the cute bubbly girl was used interchangeably for her. she's very sweet both on and off stage. all of the group members were. she probably had the highest social media following due to her aesthetic photos and content. all of them looked like they belonged on pinterest. she was also makeup savvy and had a lot of skin care so got many promos and sponsorships from that. her name was banyen and she was an international idol from thailand!
then we have the soft girl of the group. her name was jae-eun. she was pretty short and kinda chubby but very shy and soft spoken. she was main singer and rapper.
the tough boy. his name was shik. shik is a sweet heart off stage. one of the rappers and dancers. he was actually pretty soft outside of his persona.
the jokester. another boy of the group. he was half black half korean. i found him to be very nice. he did struggle in the industry in the beginning but his mother had connections made through networking that allowed him to make it into the group. he hopes to have a solo career one day under a bigger company. his name is hwan. he was one of the main dancers and main vocals.
♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡♫⋆｡
some basics of this dr are that stalkers, sasaengs, diet culture, and general toxicity in k-pop do not exist. i do not wish to deal with the drama and struggles of that and hate to see other idols go through it. i did not want for my friends to go through the same as well. he did not get one however across the five years though. i scripted that i spoke korean and english.
also those were the only things i ever scripted about this dr. i wanted it to be as exciting as possible so everything was left up to chance.
i shifted to this reality using the adhd method.
🌊˚.༄ h2o dr 🌊˚.༄
july 2022 - october 2022time spent in dr; seven months
i don't often see people write down, talk about, or script this dr. this was my very first fandom drs. even though k-pop itself is a fandom, i personally would not consider it a fandom based dr since it does not belong to any specific group, just the general industry of it.
i got the idea for this reality because i was in a summery mood at the time and binge watched this show and mako mermaids with my cousin on his birthday. we watched this show together and i came up with the idea lol. after that, i kept it going for a little bit longer in my dr until i kinda forgot about it. i was honestly too tired switching between this dr and my k-pop dr and another dr on top of this and decided to take a break with this one. i may revisit it. i still have the script in a google doc.
my merfolk power was substanciakinesis. this granted me the ability to harden water almost as if it was like glass or crystallized. it would be strong, sturdy, and indestructible. if i so choose, i can let it revert back to water after a bit, or keep it crystal like forever.
a bit of a con about this reality was that it was actually pretty annoying. that and having to keep such a secret. i did have some lore to it however. it is a coming of age thing when someone in the family turns thirteen. i shifted to when i was thirteen and did the ceremony then shifted again the next time to when i was seventeen to eighteen as that was my age at the time. i had a single dad that i lived with and one ten year old sister who was later fourteen in the story. she was really sweet and honestly i miss her.
i will say though that the powers made it worth it. the ability to breathe underwater is honestly so cool and such a strange sensation. like you don't take notice on how strange a sensation it is to breathe air either until you've breathed underwater in a dr where you can.
i also shifted to this reality using the adhd method.
˗ˏˋ꒰ 📝 ꒱ hogwarts dr ˗ˏˋ꒰ 📝 ꒱
february 2022 - february 2022time spent in dr; one week
i wasn't even a fan of harry potter haha. i just shifted there because everyone else was and i decided 'hey, why not?' and such.
to decide what house i would script myself into and get sorted in, i went onto a buzzfeed quiz of which house i was. i got ravenclaw and therefore, i was a ravenclaw. i didn't associate myself with the cast too much aside from the teachers and professors because i kinda had to there. the food was pretty good though even if it was kinda out there. it was fun while it lasted but honestly it felt so crowded and overwhelming to me and i'm unsure why. i guess because of the classes that i had to take.
i only shifted there once.
i shifted to this reality using my waiting room.
☄. *. ⋆ alien dr ☄. *. ⋆
march 2022 - april 2022time spent in dr; three months
this was the last dr i shifted to before my shifting break. it was a pretty fun one. my main ability was anti gravity. alien me in this dr is slightly humanoid. in most of my drs, i look like how i look in this reality here but for this one, i looked much more different and dressed even more different. it was a cultural based clothes for the home planet i was from. think kinda star wars based but not a star wars inspired reality.
in my dr, i had antennas which basically acted as eyes to see from 360 degrees. hair isn't hair but made from a liquidy slime of bright neons. the neons change colors depending on emotions.
though i did spent quite a while in this reality, i don't have too much to say about it. this is because the most i can say is just different greetings, food, and general culture from aliens than humans. it's from another galaxy and obviously planet. and life span on this planet is much longer. we are more durable than humans.
when an alien passes away, their energy becomes one with the stars, turning into star dust and watching over their people.
i shifted to this reality using my waiting room.
💥✧࿐ mha/bnha dr 💥 ✧࿐
april 2024 - nowtime spent in dr; twelve days
this was my first shift i did since my two year break! well, technically it was my waiting room but i used my waiting room to shift here immediately after and spent a week there.
i plan on going back to it but not much of my script was done to it yet. i prefer to be spontaneous in my scripting and just choose to cover the basics. i don't even script future upcoming events.
i'll be honest, it was a bit trippy having this as my first animated dr ever. if felt so real but the lines surrounding my hands made it all feel crazy. i think next time i will try realistic instead, haha.
my quirk in this reality is prediction. i can predict the actions and attacks of my opponent. think of it like the attacks in the video game undertale. a warning sign shows up for certain attacks that alerts the player to move out of the way.
one of my friends in this dr's quirk is extensions. her nails can grow into sharp nail extensions that cut like steel.
i am in the hero class of class 3a along with the big three. we spend a lot of time together. i am closer with nijere since she's the most friendly of them.
i shifted to this reality using my waiting room which i shifted from using the astral projection method.
⋆｡ﾟ🌖 wolfblood dr 🌖 ﾟ｡⋆
april 2024 - nowtime spent in dr; eight months four months each shift
wolfblood is an english/british teen drama live action series about what are essentially werewolves known as wolfbloods. a wolfblood is born human and looks human up until a certain age and moon. once they reach that age, their blood changes and they become a wolf. they can then interchange between wolf and human however they please except on a full moon. unless of course it is a blood moon. on a blood moon, a wolfblood looks the exact same except their mind transforms.
there's no unique feature of a wolfblood. they can be any race, religion, etc. the thing that holds them all together is being a wolfblood. in my dr.
in my dr, i looked the exact same as here. i came from a small family of wolfbloods. i decided to take my family in my h2o reality and put them here as well. it has a similar coming of age theme. at a certain age, a wolfblood transforms just as in my h2o dr, once you are a certain age, you can go and become a merfolk. in this dr, i lived in england my entire life there and attend the same school as the main cast. however, i am not friends with the main cast nor enemies.
i can sense something is up with them as they act weird in class but can't put my finger on it. i scripted it so i was unaware of the identities on my peers.
‧₊˚🌿 forest dr ‧₊˚🌿
april 2024 - nowtime spent in dr; two months
copying this from a previous post here, don't mind me.
'so a bit about my dr that i am shifting to. it is not any fandom related dr but instead an alternate reality where i live in the forest in an advanced tree house. think of the houses in trees type. i spend a lot of time there meditating, practicing spells, and spending time with the animals there but especially wolves. i still have internet connection but irl i don't live close to nature so this is just perfect for me. i'm happy in both this reality and my dr. i switch between the two whenever i feel like it.'
i also shifted to this one first astral projecting. but now i just meditate until i shift. when i shift, i am also in the same meditating position as well. i wanted this to instead be connected to my waiting room, to become a sort of escapism for myself. just in a different way.
you can see the posts i made about the outfits that i wear in this dr here if you want! you can also see more of my outfits in that reality here as well. :)
i shifted to this reality using my meditation method.
⋆🔗 ˚⟡˖ ࣪ conclusion ⋆ ˚⟡˖ ࣪🔗
this is all i have for today! i hope you enjoyed it. perhaps this gave you all motivation or some scripting and reality ideas. i may have forgotten some things to include and add. apologies if some stuff didn't make sense. i hope you enjoyed the read though!i will say this as well and leave you off with some general scripting ideas
: ̗̀➛ you cannot die
: ̗̀➛ you cannot get hurt
: ̗̀➛ you always get a good night sleep
: ̗̀➛ if you have chronic illnesses like me, you can script that your chronic illnesses are more manageable or you simply just don't have it.
that is all i have for now and happy shifting! ᥫ᭡
2024.05.14 02:50 starfinder23 surgery story (as a teen)
I'm 10 days post op now and healing super well so I wanted to share my story, bc I know getting surgery can be super scary and it definitely helped me to hear from people who's surgeries went well :)
For reference I'm 14 f
It started with what I assumed to just be a random stomach ache (I've had minor tummy troubles for my whole life so it's not usually a concern), but it got worse over the span of a couple days and also developed into back pain. Around 4 days into the pain we decided to go to urgent care, and the Dr said I had pretty much a "textbool case" of gallstones. We scheduled an ultrasound for 2 days later.
I never ended up going to that ultrasound bc the day after urgent care, I couldn't sleep because the pain was so bad. So we went to the ER, hoping they could at least prescribe some pain meds (ibuprofen wasn't doing much good).
After hours of waiting, they finally got me in for an ultrasound at the ER. They looked at my pancreas, kidney, liver, and of course gallbladder. A few more hours later and we finally get to talk to a doctor (and get some meds) the doctor confirmed that I definitely had gallstones (we later found out the were 2 cm and there were at least 4.)
Eventually we spoke to the surgeon, who basically said that the pain wasn't going to improve so it made sense to just take it out now. He explained that I had a very borderline case. I definitely had gallstones that were clearly causing pain, but I hadn't experienced and nausea/vomiting/fever. However, I had a slighty raised white blood cell count so he still advised to get it removed asap.
I'll spare the details, but because I'm not an adult they had to transfer me to the children's hospital in order to do an operation and we ended up not being able to do it until th next day, because it wasn't technically an "emergency." The nurses were mostly good, although they wouldn't give me any pain meds stronger than Tylenol/ibuprofen until post op (so I was in mild pain for the entire night)
The next day, I got prepped for surgery and me and my mom spoke to the anesthesiologist and surgeon. Both explained exactly what was going to happen, which made me feel a lot better.
They gave me anxiety meds, so ngl I don't remember much after they wheeled me into the or.
It definitely hurts for a few days post op. Mostly the action of sitting and standing up. I had to learn to use my arms and legs in place of the core muscles, but I was able to walk to the bathroom a couple hours post op.
10 days later, I'm back to normal activities with no pain and my incisions are healing super well. Very glad I got the removal over with, and my surgeon didn't give me any dietary restrictions.
I know this was super long, but hopefully someone found it helpful :) good luck to anyone getting surgery soon 💚
submitted by starfinder23 to gallbladders [link] [comments]
For reference I'm 14 f
It started with what I assumed to just be a random stomach ache (I've had minor tummy troubles for my whole life so it's not usually a concern), but it got worse over the span of a couple days and also developed into back pain. Around 4 days into the pain we decided to go to urgent care, and the Dr said I had pretty much a "textbool case" of gallstones. We scheduled an ultrasound for 2 days later.
I never ended up going to that ultrasound bc the day after urgent care, I couldn't sleep because the pain was so bad. So we went to the ER, hoping they could at least prescribe some pain meds (ibuprofen wasn't doing much good).
After hours of waiting, they finally got me in for an ultrasound at the ER. They looked at my pancreas, kidney, liver, and of course gallbladder. A few more hours later and we finally get to talk to a doctor (and get some meds) the doctor confirmed that I definitely had gallstones (we later found out the were 2 cm and there were at least 4.)
Eventually we spoke to the surgeon, who basically said that the pain wasn't going to improve so it made sense to just take it out now. He explained that I had a very borderline case. I definitely had gallstones that were clearly causing pain, but I hadn't experienced and nausea/vomiting/fever. However, I had a slighty raised white blood cell count so he still advised to get it removed asap.
I'll spare the details, but because I'm not an adult they had to transfer me to the children's hospital in order to do an operation and we ended up not being able to do it until th next day, because it wasn't technically an "emergency." The nurses were mostly good, although they wouldn't give me any pain meds stronger than Tylenol/ibuprofen until post op (so I was in mild pain for the entire night)
The next day, I got prepped for surgery and me and my mom spoke to the anesthesiologist and surgeon. Both explained exactly what was going to happen, which made me feel a lot better.
They gave me anxiety meds, so ngl I don't remember much after they wheeled me into the or.
It definitely hurts for a few days post op. Mostly the action of sitting and standing up. I had to learn to use my arms and legs in place of the core muscles, but I was able to walk to the bathroom a couple hours post op.
10 days later, I'm back to normal activities with no pain and my incisions are healing super well. Very glad I got the removal over with, and my surgeon didn't give me any dietary restrictions.
I know this was super long, but hopefully someone found it helpful :) good luck to anyone getting surgery soon 💚
2024.05.14 02:41 Pyroski The Midterms of 1848 and 1849 Pine & Liberty
 | In the final months of Daniel Webster's term, the economy, still reeling from the War of 1839 and the subsequent Panic of 1843, began a slow but steady recovery. William Lloyd Garrison, the incoming President who shattered the Federalists' grip on power, stepped into office with a bold agenda aimed at bolstering the economic upturn and lifting the nation's spirits. His initial flurry of legislative efforts included a proposed second bill of rights to prevent a repeat of the Sedition Acts, as well as measures to curb speech, the introduction of an equal rights and poll tax amendment, the reduction of the National Bank's influence, which Garrison branded as "corrupt" and "flawed," in favor of greater state control, and the full nationalization of the road industry. Congress has rejected every one of these, however, Garrison has managed to push through some reforms, such as removing Nathan Appleton as the bank's president in 1848, granting states more authority over monetary policies, the nonrenewal of the sedition acts, the District of Maine region's autonomy, imposing national limits on alcohol sales, and ban of the purchase of quantities over 16, and the ending of U.S. cooperation in the deportation of fugitives. However, widespread American fatigue over aggressive slavery policies, coupled with an indifferent Martin Van Buren administration, terms of the Treaty of Brussels, and interest in the settlement of new territories in the northwest, resulted in minimal diplomatic opposition to Garrison's fugitive policy. submitted by Pyroski to u/Pyroski [link] [comments] Despite minor economic hiccups, trade has largely returned to its pre-war status as industries have stabilized. This was partly due to then-President Nathan Appleton raising interest rates in response to Garrison's funding cuts and minor currency instability resulting from the sudden influx of state control. Furthermore, despite Garrison's efforts to establish further independence from the increasingly close British empire by expanding trade with Haiti, Mexico, France, and the Netherlands, foreign investments, particularly by the British, in railroads and other industries continue, much to Garrison's chagrin. Meanwhile, on the domestic front, with William Lloyd Garrison shepherding the more affluent Liberty party to adopt a more radical rhetoric against the establishment and secret societies as a whole, the Anti-Masonic party would see a sudden bleed of support, as several of its representatives switched their party affiliations in their 1846 and 1847 campaigns. This bleed would continue, as the party became Garrison's largest outsider ally on key legislative reforms, with Garrison championing the collapsing party's platform on issues such as poll tax and voting reforms, and fines for secret societies. By 1848, party officials would agree on a formal merge, as the remainder of party members switched over. As Temperance sentiment spreads far and wide across the nation, Natavist feelings soar to unprecedented heights; as Catholics and the Irish find themselves in the crosshairs of nativism, owing to stereotypes associating them with regular drinking and heavy alcohol consumption. https://preview.redd.it/842ju2rxl90d1.png?width=600&format=png&auto=webp&s=85820820ec95de1b3299657f3fe8a2d267920b63 Federalist Led by their esteemed leader, George Evans, federalists have undergone a significant transformation following a series of setbacks, including major electoral defeats to the oligarchy during the "Revolution of 1846" in both the Presidential and House races, and narrowly retaining control of the Senate. They distanced themselves from the still-sensitive Daniel Webster administration, and addressing concerns over his well-known alcoholism and allegations of sympathy to liquor, they adopted a more pronounced pro-temperance stance; with states such as Connecticut and New Hampshire, where they held sway over governorships and state legislatures, implementing stricter regulations. Moreover, although initially backing the Sedition Acts and playing key roles in its creation alongside Federalist President Noah Webster in 1827, most of the party shifted its stance by 1847, opposing its renewal. While Federalists have supported specific measures during the Garrison presidency, particularly those related to Temperance and opposition to the Sedition Acts, the party has emerged as Garrison's main opponent, leveraging their status as the second-largest party in the House and their majority in the Senate, to block much of his agenda. Notably, Massachusetts representative Nathaniel Briggs Borden, supported by the party establishment, spearheaded Federalist efforts to censure Garrison for his attempts to rein in the National Bank. Nonetheless, with the defense of the Law and Order party, Garrison managed to evade censure with a vote margin of 19-35. Nevertheless, leveraging their control in the Senate, Federalists effectively obstructed Garrison's legislative agenda, halting proposed cuts to national defense meant to prioritize funding for education and infrastructure, as outlined in Garrison's Bill of rights. Additionally, they stymied social reforms proposed by Garrison, including provisions in The Penitentiary Act of 1848 aimed at alleviating penalties for tax evasion, victims of the Sedition Acts, and Dorr sympathizers. Furthermore, they thwarted the full implementation of Garrison's Land Reform policy, which aimed to repurchase all lands acquired by foreign investors. Despite defeats amid the "Revolution of 1846" and a party identity crisis, the glimmer of victory at the end of the tunnel, driven by opposition to Garrison and his efforts to dismantle the National Bank, has spurred party unity. Centering their campaign primarily on one issue: The National Bank, Federalists argue that Garrison's attempts to curtail it are unconstitutional, citing the 13th amendment which established a strong permanent bank, and criticizing his use of the spoils system, particularly Arthur Tappan's appointment as bank president in the wake of Appleton's removal. Opponents criticize Tappan as too inexperienced, highlighting his close friendship with Garrison and lack of a banking background, exacerbated by Appleton's own nearly decade-long experience as its president, to allege cronyism. On economics, Federalists campaign on reinstating Appleton; passing legislation to ensure the bank's stability; and the further federalizing of the bank to its pre-Garrison status. Cooperation with private industries in the construction of infrastructure, to limit government spending so that the nation may pay off the heavy debts sustained from a lengthy war on top of an economic depression. They also contest Garrison's efforts to distance New England's ties with British trade and investors, advocating instead for a stronger connection with other European Powers; They champion a return to a close-knit relationship, both diplomatically and economically, with Federalists emphasizing Britain, which contributed heavily to their independence and later the diplomatic resolution of the War of 1839, as their foremost ally. This political cartoon, prominent during the Revolutionary War to depict Yankees as British loyalists, has regained popularity as a means to mock the Federalists' affection towards Britain and pro-British policies. Liberty Unseating the long-standing single-party rule of the Federalists during the Revolution of 1846, the Liberty Party stepped into the fray amidst a transformative era following a return to stability. Conceived by now-President William Lloyd Garrison under the influences of transcendentalism and liberty, advocating opposition to the government and support for limited intervention, it proved easier said than done to translate ideals into reality. Garrison eventually faced the stark reality upon assuming office, facing a slim majority in the House and a minority in the Senate, which forced him to navigate within the system, leaving much of his agenda in vain. Furthermore, Garrison's failure to pass equal rights and his proposed bill of rights has led inner-party critics, led by George Ripley, a Unitarian minister, and Henry David Thoreau, an author and former campaigner of Garrison, who has returned to civilization from his isolation in the forests of Massachusetts, to label Garrison as "corrupted" by political institutions. Other intra-party critics criticize his national restrictions on alcohol, attempts to block foreign business and investment, and fines for secret societies as further increasing the authority and scope of the government when the party's whole platform stood against it. Nonetheless, allies argue that his restrictions and expansion of executive power are necessary evils to tackle the root causes of societal issues and special interests and to promote the nation's independence while also supporting local businesses and industries. Despite the emergence of splintering anti-Garrison factions, the Liberty Party has sought to navigate controversy by upholding the core tenets of Garrison's presidency. These include his cessation of collaboration with the U.S. on the deportation of fugitives from the Hudson-Greenway line; dismantling what Liberators perceive as a corrupt National Bank, and his instrumental role in achieving Statehood for the District of Maine after a struggle spanning over a decade, resulting in the creation of two new states: Maine and Bangor. In addition to championing Garrison's established agendas, the party endeavors to garner support for unfinished initiatives. These include proposals to expand the House's seats from 65 to 86, with each state gaining two more representatives than its electoral vote in the Electoral College, thus aiming to bolster representation. Furthermore, they advocate for Garrison's Second Bill of Rights, seeking to amend the constitution to ensure rights for all citizens and to federalize the poll tax to a reduced fee of $1.80. Additionally, they push for legislation aimed at diminishing the influence of Jewish bankers and investments, echoing Garrison's public condemnation of them as "the enemy of the people and Christ" and their purported "stranglehold over our nation's wealth." The origin of the party name and of its followers, William Lloyd Garrison's \"The Liberator\" has remaiend infleuntial even despite Garrison's dpearture, with followers hanging the cover of the paper to show their support for the party. Law and Order Despite suffering heavy defeats amidst the Revolution of 1846 and Thomas Dorr's rebellion, the cornerstone of the party's creation, now relegated to the back burner of voters' minds, the Law and Order alliance of Farmers, Liberals, Traditionalists, and former Federalists and Nationalists finds itself in an awkward position. Larger parties such as the Federalists have adopted the centerpiece coalition's platform, such as the Federalists now championing calls for cooperation with the U.S. and moderate views on black and women's rights, while the Liberty Party advocates for limited government and a smaller national bank; Nonetheless, the Law and Order coalition has attempted to carve out a platform wedged between the two current party giants. Led by the party's House leader Robert C. Winthrop, the party has strongly emphasized its economic agenda, in a bid to set it apart from the two leading parties. They advocate for a limited National Bank, arguing for its scope to be restricted to essential sectors such as agriculture, infrastructure, and trade. Additionally, they propose limits on the money supply to maintain a stable bimetal gold and silver standard, advocate for increased transparency regarding bank loans, and impose requirements for loan eligibility. Moreover, emphasizing a limited federal government approach in favor of state control, they argue for allowing states to charter their own banks to a certain extent. They have also advocated for giving full control to the states to set their whiskey and alcohol policies, supporting government rollbacks on Garrison's national restrictions. Critics from the Law and Order faction lambaste Garrison for what they perceive as insufficient efforts to rein in the National Bank. Instead, they accuse him of employing the spoils system by appointing his friend, Arthur Tappan, whom many consider inexperienced, to oversee it, despite most of the party voting to replace Appleton with him. The party has argued for lower tariffs, contending that high tariffs disproportionately affect the nation's farmers while benefiting wealthy foreign and domestic investors and businesses; Additionally, they argue that lower tariffs would benefit consumer interests. Championed by Winthrop and fellow prominent Law and Orderites, including Senator Franklin Pierce, former Governor Edward Everett, Representative Charles G. Atherton, Rhode Island speaker John Hopkins Clarke, and a now one-legged John Fairfield, the party has attempted to adopt a "Proclamation of Neutrality" regarding foreign policy, believing their strength could be achieved through trade and cordial relations with any country, regardless of past relations or tensions with the nation's ally states. Most notably, their support for this policy extends to the nation's most infamous and longstanding enemy, the United States, with whom the nation has fought two wars. Any attempts to reconcile have been further complicated after the election of vocal anti-Fugitive ally, William Lloyd Garrison, who halted Yankee cooperation in the retrieval and return of fugitives. Nevertheless, this faction, derisively labeled the "Doughfaces" by critics due to their perceived willingness to bend to U.S. interests argues that cooperation was necessary. They point to the provisions of the Treaty of Brussels and the agreed-upon reward for captured fugitives, whom they claim weren't even citizens of New England, that the U.S. agreed to pay; Which they contend as a necessary evil to tackle and settle the burdensome debts the nation has accumulated in recent years. In stark contrast, the "Firebrands," nicknamed as such due to the fearmongering that their support for Garrison's policy will spark a third crisis between the two bordering nations, are led by Representative John P. Hale of New Hampshire and Associate Justice Marcus Morton, the 1841 National Party nominee. Famously during a party meeting, Hale would passionately argue, "After witnessing the sacrifice of countless lives, the toll of significant casualties, the devastation wrought upon our infrastructure, and the profound scars etched upon our nation, it would be nothing short of tragic to discover ourselves entangled once more in the very predicament we endeavored to escape..." This sentiment has been echoed similarly by the rest of the Firebrands as they emerge as the top faction opposed to inner-party calls for cooperation with the United States. \"DIPLOMATIC SCALES, a true balance\" a pro-Doughface political cartoon, contends through a smudge of humor, that the only way that the two nations, New England and the United States could remain in harmony is through compromise. Meanwhile, highlighting their role in the Treaty of Brussells and War of 1839, a man in the bottom-right conner, the personifcation of Britian interjects with his own oponions. |
2024.05.14 02:38 TradedMedia Caleb Baldwin & Juan Huizar Of Sage Real Estate Sell Long Beach Multifamily For $3.15M
A garden-style building named "The Euclid" with 12 one-bedroom units located at 3650 East 2nd Street in Long Beach was sold for $3,150,000. The property spans 7,581 square feet and was transacted at a price per unit of $262,500 and a price per square foot of $416, offering amenities such as storage facilities and garages. Positioned in the desirable rental district of Belmont Heights near popular dining spots on 2nd Street and Broadway, this multifamily asset presents an attractive investment opportunity in Long Beach.
Learn More: Caleb Baldwin & Juan Huizar Of Sage Real Estate Sell Long Beach Multifamily For $3.15M
submitted by TradedMedia to tradedla [link] [comments]
Summary of transaction details:
- Property Type: Multifamily
- Transaction Amount: $3,150,000
- Units: 12
- Price Per Unit: $262,500
- Square Footage: 7,581
- Market: Long Beach
- Brokers: Caleb Baldwin & Juan Huizar - Sage Real Estate
Learn More: Caleb Baldwin & Juan Huizar Of Sage Real Estate Sell Long Beach Multifamily For $3.15M
2024.05.14 02:26 Pyroski The Midterms of 1848 and 1849 Pine & Liberty
 | In the final months of Daniel Webster's term, the economy, still reeling from the War of 1839 and the subsequent Panic of 1843, began a slow but steady recovery. William Lloyd Garrison, the incoming President who shattered the Federalists' grip on power, stepped into office with a bold agenda aimed at bolstering the economic upturn and lifting the nation's spirits. His initial flurry of legislative efforts included a proposed second bill of rights to prevent a repeat of the Sedition Acts, as well as measures to curb speech, the introduction of an equal rights and poll tax amendment, the reduction of the National Bank's influence, which Garrison branded as "corrupt" and "flawed," in favor of greater state control, and the full nationalization of the road industry. Congress has rejected every one of these, however, Garrison has managed to push through some reforms, such as removing Nathan Appleton as the bank's president in 1848, granting states more authority over monetary policies, the nonrenewal of the sedition acts, the District of Maine region's autonomy, imposing national limits on alcohol sales, and ban of the purchase of quantities over 16, and the ending of U.S. cooperation in the deportation of fugitives. However, widespread American fatigue over aggressive slavery policies, coupled with an indifferent Martin Van Buren administration, terms of the Treaty of Brussels, and interest in the settlement of new territories in the northwest, resulted in minimal diplomatic opposition to Garrison's fugitive policy. submitted by Pyroski to Presidentialpoll [link] [comments] Despite minor economic hiccups, trade has largely returned to its pre-war status as industries have stabilized. This was partly due to then-President Nathan Appleton raising interest rates in response to Garrison's funding cuts and minor currency instability resulting from the sudden influx of state control. Furthermore, despite Garrison's efforts to establish further independence from the increasingly close British empire by expanding trade with Haiti, Mexico, France, and the Netherlands, foreign investments, particularly by the British, in railroads and other industries continue, much to Garrison's chagrin. Meanwhile, on the domestic front, with William Lloyd Garrison shepherding the more affluent Liberty party to adopt a more radical rhetoric against the establishment and secret societies as a whole, the Anti-Masonic party would see a sudden bleed of support, as several of its representatives switched their party affiliations in their 1846 and 1847 campaigns. This bleed would continue, as the party became Garrison's largest outsider ally on key legislative reforms, with Garrison championing the collapsing party's platform on issues such as poll tax and voting reforms, and fines for secret societies. By 1848, party officials would agree on a formal merge, as the remainder of party members switched over. As Temperance sentiment spreads far and wide across the nation, Natavist feelings soar to unprecedented heights; as Catholics and the Irish find themselves in the crosshairs of nativism, owing to stereotypes associating them with regular drinking and heavy alcohol consumption. Federalist Led by their esteemed leader, George Evans, federalists have undergone a significant transformation following a series of setbacks, including major electoral defeats to the oligarchy during the "Revolution of 1846" in both the Presidential and House races, and narrowly retaining control of the Senate. They distanced themselves from the still-sensitive Daniel Webster administration, and addressing concerns over his well-known alcoholism and allegations of sympathy to liquor, they adopted a more pronounced pro-temperance stance; with states such as Connecticut and New Hampshire, where they held sway over governorships and state legislatures, implementing stricter regulations. Moreover, although initially backing the Sedition Acts and playing key roles in its creation alongside Federalist President Noah Webster in 1827, most of the party shifted its stance by 1847, opposing its renewal. While Federalists have supported specific measures during the Garrison presidency, particularly those related to Temperance and opposition to the Sedition Acts, the party has emerged as Garrison's main opponent, leveraging their status as the second-largest party in the House and their majority in the Senate, to block much of his agenda. Notably, Massachusetts representative Nathaniel Briggs Borden, supported by the party establishment, spearheaded Federalist efforts to censure Garrison for his attempts to rein in the National Bank. Nonetheless, with the defense of the Law and Order party, Garrison managed to evade censure with a vote margin of 19-35. Nevertheless, leveraging their control in the Senate, Federalists effectively obstructed Garrison's legislative agenda, halting proposed cuts to national defense meant to prioritize funding for education and infrastructure, as outlined in Garrison's Bill of rights. Additionally, they stymied social reforms proposed by Garrison, including provisions in The Penitentiary Act of 1848 aimed at alleviating penalties for tax evasion, victims of the Sedition Acts, and Dorr sympathizers. Furthermore, they thwarted the full implementation of Garrison's Land Reform policy, which aimed to repurchase all lands acquired by foreign investors. Despite defeats amid the "Revolution of 1846" and a party identity crisis, the glimmer of victory at the end of the tunnel, driven by opposition to Garrison and his efforts to dismantle the National Bank, has spurred party unity. Centering their campaign primarily on one issue: The National Bank, Federalists argue that Garrison's attempts to curtail it are unconstitutional, citing the 13th amendment which established a strong permanent bank, and criticizing his use of the spoils system, particularly Arthur Tappan's appointment as bank president in the wake of Appleton's removal. Opponents criticize Tappan as too inexperienced, highlighting his close friendship with Garrison and lack of a banking background, exacerbated by Appleton's own nearly decade-long experience as its president, to allege cronyism. On economics, Federalists campaign on reinstating Appleton; passing legislation to ensure the bank's stability; and the further federalizing of the bank to its pre-Garrison status. Cooperation with private industries in the construction of infrastructure, to limit government spending so that the nation may pay off the heavy debts sustained from a lengthy war on top of an economic depression. They also contest Garrison's efforts to distance New England's ties with British trade and investors, advocating instead for a stronger connection with other European Powers; They champion a return to a close-knit relationship, both diplomatically and economically, with Federalists emphasizing Britain, which contributed heavily to their independence and later the diplomatic resolution of the War of 1839, as their foremost ally. https://preview.redd.it/kw6x3jsyu90d1.png?width=645&format=png&auto=webp&s=61eea696763d9a22017b26e91766ed73f9f37cc2 Liberty Unseating the long-standing single-party rule of the Federalists during the Revolution of 1846, the Liberty Party stepped into the fray amidst a transformative era following a return to stability. Conceived by now-President William Lloyd Garrison under the influences of transcendentalism and liberty, advocating opposition to the government and support for limited intervention, it proved easier said than done to translate ideals into reality. Garrison eventually faced the stark reality upon assuming office, facing a slim majority in the House and a minority in the Senate, which forced him to navigate within the system, leaving much of his agenda in vain. Furthermore, Garrison's failure to pass equal rights and his proposed bill of rights has led inner-party critics, led by George Ripley, a Unitarian minister, and Henry David Thoreau, an author and former campaigner of Garrison, who has returned to civilization from his isolation in the forests of Massachusetts, to label Garrison as "corrupted" by political institutions. Other intra-party critics criticize his national restrictions on alcohol, attempts to block foreign business and investment, and fines for secret societies as further increasing the authority and scope of the government when the party's whole platform stood against it. Nonetheless, allies argue that his restrictions and expansion of executive power are necessary evils to tackle the root causes of societal issues and special interests and to promote the nation's independence while also supporting local businesses and industries. Despite the emergence of splintering anti-Garrison factions, the Liberty Party has sought to navigate controversy by upholding the core tenets of Garrison's presidency. These include his cessation of collaboration with the U.S. on the deportation of fugitives from the Hudson-Greenway line; dismantling what Liberators perceive as a corrupt National Bank, and his instrumental role in achieving Statehood for the District of Maine after a struggle spanning over a decade, resulting in the creation of two new states: Maine and Bangor. In addition to championing Garrison's established agendas, the party endeavors to garner support for unfinished initiatives. These include proposals to expand the House's seats from 65 to 86, with each state gaining two more representatives than its electoral vote in the Electoral College, thus aiming to bolster representation. Furthermore, they advocate for Garrison's Second Bill of Rights, seeking to amend the constitution to ensure rights for all citizens and to federalize the poll tax to a reduced fee of $1.80. Additionally, they push for legislation aimed at diminishing the influence of Jewish bankers and investments, echoing Garrison's public condemnation of them as "the enemy of the people and Christ" and their purported "stranglehold over our nation's wealth." https://preview.redd.it/9xaddoj2v90d1.png?width=1200&format=png&auto=webp&s=362325892120aab3df3f014dd3dfdb71f42440d9 Law and Order Despite suffering heavy defeats amidst the Revolution of 1846 and Thomas Dorr's rebellion, the cornerstone of the party's creation, now relegated to the back burner of voters' minds, the Law and Order alliance of Farmers, Liberals, Traditionalists, and former Federalists and Nationalists finds itself in an awkward position. Larger parties such as the Federalists have adopted the centerpiece coalition's platform, such as the Federalists now championing calls for cooperation with the U.S. and moderate views on black and women's rights, while the Liberty Party advocates for limited government and a smaller national bank; Nonetheless, the Law and Order coalition has attempted to carve out a platform wedged between the two current party giants. Led by the party's House leader Robert C. Winthrop, the party has strongly emphasized its economic agenda, in a bid to set it apart from the two leading parties. They advocate for a limited National Bank, arguing for its scope to be restricted to essential sectors such as agriculture, infrastructure, and trade. Additionally, they propose limits on the money supply to maintain a stable bimetal gold and silver standard, advocate for increased transparency regarding bank loans, and impose requirements for loan eligibility. Moreover, emphasizing a limited federal government approach in favor of state control, they argue for allowing states to charter their own banks to a certain extent. They have also advocated for giving full control to the states to set their whiskey and alcohol policies, supporting government rollbacks on Garrison's national restrictions. Critics from the Law and Order faction lambaste Garrison for what they perceive as insufficient efforts to rein in the National Bank. Instead, they accuse him of employing the spoils system by appointing his friend, Arthur Tappan, whom many consider inexperienced, to oversee it, despite most of the party voting to replace Appleton with him. The party has argued for lower tariffs, contending that high tariffs disproportionately affect the nation's farmers while benefiting wealthy foreign and domestic investors and businesses; Additionally, they argue that lower tariffs would benefit consumer interests. Championed by Winthrop and fellow prominent Law and Orderites, including Senator Franklin Pierce, former Governor Edward Everett, Representative Charles G. Atherton, Rhode Island speaker John Hopkins Clarke, and a now one-legged John Fairfield, the party has attempted to adopt a "Proclamation of Neutrality" regarding foreign policy, believing their strength could be achieved through trade and cordial relations with any country, regardless of past relations or tensions with the nation's ally states. Most notably, their support for this policy extends to the nation's most infamous and longstanding enemy, the United States, with whom the nation has fought two wars. Any attempts to reconcile have been further complicated after the election of vocal anti-Fugitive ally, William Lloyd Garrison, who halted Yankee cooperation in the retrieval and return of fugitives. Nevertheless, this faction, derisively labeled the "Doughfaces" by critics due to their perceived willingness to bend to U.S. interests argues that cooperation was necessary. They point to the provisions of the Treaty of Brussels and the agreed-upon reward for captured fugitives, whom they claim weren't even citizens of New England, that the U.S. agreed to pay; Which they contend as a necessary evil to tackle and settle the burdensome debts the nation has accumulated in recent years. In stark contrast, the "Firebrands," nicknamed as such due to the fearmongering that their support for Garrison's policy will spark a third crisis between the two bordering nations, are led by Representative John P. Hale of New Hampshire and Associate Justice Marcus Morton, the 1841 National Party nominee. Famously during a party meeting, Hale would passionately argue, "After witnessing the sacrifice of countless lives, the toll of significant casualties, the devastation wrought upon our infrastructure, and the profound scars etched upon our nation, it would be nothing short of tragic to discover ourselves entangled once more in the very predicament we endeavored to escape..." This sentiment has been echoed similarly by the rest of the Firebrands as they emerge as the top faction opposed to inner-party calls for cooperation with the United States. Minor PartyThis section is dedicated to minor parties that lack ballot access or cannot field candidates beyond specific races, making their chances of winning impossible.Drunkards Amidst the backdrop of anti-immigrant and Catholic sentiments fueled by campaigns advocating Temperance and the implementation of anti-alcohol measures on the national agendas of leading political factions, a coalition of politically engaged Catholic and Irish immigrants has emerged. Spearheaded by the influential editor of The Boston Post, James Gordon Bennett Sr., a Scottish Roman Catholic, their collective efforts have given rise to a small yet significant political organization: the Workingman's Party. With minor political connections, the party has largely remained native to Massachusetts, where it has contested several seats across the state, on a platform consisting of only three issues: equal protections for immigrants and immigrant workers, labor rights, and most infamously of all, opposition to temperance and alcohol restrictions. As a consequence, despite its intended role as a champion for laborers and immigrants, the party has more famously become to be known the mocking moniker of the "Drunkards" party, a label crafted by detractors to smear its reputation and insinuate that the party is run by a bunch of alcoholics who only became politically active after attempts to take or limit their bottle consumption https://preview.redd.it/p39hdv64ja0d1.png?width=1035&format=png&auto=webp&s=907ffefd3e191033384bc9ac17bab090ad4b876d View Poll |
2024.05.14 02:06 Browngirlsleuth Marin BIPOC Womens Collective
Hello All,
I’ve been in Marin (southern) for only a few years now and knew about the lack of diversity coming in. I grew up on the east coast living in Philly and Boston and moved to the Bay Area not too long ago. Marin is beautiful but I was feeling a lack of connectedness so I started a group for BIPOC women called the Marin BIPOC Women’s Collective. The aim is to be able to connect with other women and be able to share our stories and celebrate each other.
It was at first limited to Mill Valley and we just opened it up to all of Marin. Our members span all ages - a Guatemalan high school student aspiring to be an architect to a Puerto Rican force of a woman who was the first latina to graduate from Princeton!
We meet in person on the second Sunday of every month and will start doing Zooms as well for those farther out. We have a Facebook and Nextdoor page so to all of those BIPOC women out there reading this who are looking for connection and feel isolated like I have, join our collective! We just started a few months ago and would love to exchange stories and support the journeys of others like us in Marin! 🙏🏽
submitted by Browngirlsleuth to Marin [link] [comments]
I’ve been in Marin (southern) for only a few years now and knew about the lack of diversity coming in. I grew up on the east coast living in Philly and Boston and moved to the Bay Area not too long ago. Marin is beautiful but I was feeling a lack of connectedness so I started a group for BIPOC women called the Marin BIPOC Women’s Collective. The aim is to be able to connect with other women and be able to share our stories and celebrate each other.
It was at first limited to Mill Valley and we just opened it up to all of Marin. Our members span all ages - a Guatemalan high school student aspiring to be an architect to a Puerto Rican force of a woman who was the first latina to graduate from Princeton!
We meet in person on the second Sunday of every month and will start doing Zooms as well for those farther out. We have a Facebook and Nextdoor page so to all of those BIPOC women out there reading this who are looking for connection and feel isolated like I have, join our collective! We just started a few months ago and would love to exchange stories and support the journeys of others like us in Marin! 🙏🏽
2024.05.14 01:35 ArmChairAnalyst86 Space Weather Update 5/13/2024 - The Party is NOT Over - All Eyes On New Active Regions WOW!
 | Good Afternoon everyone. I am happy to report that I got mostly caught up at work today and have a little free time to get this update out. You won't believe this but I met an solarmax member in the wild. I ran into an old friend at the cookout yesterday and we were talking about the auroras and I started talking about the sub and her husband said he was here getting info this weekend! Cool stuff. Data is still pouring in from last weekends storm and I am combing through it and simultaneously deep into research mode for the next article that must be written with precision and poise. Furthermore, with some data coming in and comparisons between the 2003 and 2023 event, I can already see significant relevancy. In fact, I just hit delete on about 3 paragraphs because I realized that talking about it had hijacked the whole update, and that it is better to incorporate those findings in the coming article mentioned yesterday. submitted by ArmChairAnalyst86 to SolarMax [link] [comments] That is not the reason of THIS update though. The reason for this update is in the title. You know what they say. After the party its the afterparty. Sometimes the after party is more exciting than the actual. With that being said, I could hardly believe my eyes when I saw the active regions on the earth facing side this morning. Yesterday I had remarked about AR3676 and how it literally exploded onto the scene with a Beta-Gamma config. At the time, it and AR3664 were the only AR's with Beta-Gamma-Delta or Beta-Gamma. Well when I checked on things this morning after getting caught up, alot has changed, and if you are ready to chase some more aurora, it has changed in a good way! Here is a side by side of yesterday and today and while there are no AR's resembling the legendary AR3663...yet. AR3663 was just a pup once too, and they just grow up so fast you know? It's like one minute they are growing their first tiny delta and the next they are firing off X-Class flares and sending aurora to the Caribbean. We should be encouraged that the sunspot number is rising and whatever is going on right now is favorable for the rapid formation of sunspot configurations that are more likely to produce big flares. Does this automatically mean are are hitting the repeat button? Nope and hopefully by now it is clear that you have to take this as it comes, but nonetheless, I am encouraged by what I see today as concerns aurora chances in the lower lats but we will have to wait and see. I encourage you all to keep an eye on these active regions. Also, do you notice that they are roughly appearing in similar latitudes? Interesting pattern to note. https://preview.redd.it/1eto08qps90d1.png?width=804&format=png&auto=webp&s=7a5cf81a9b63113a724eac6044167281804b6136 In terms of flaring today, we had a back to back M4.8 and M6.6 and an M3.6 a few hours after. I have never in my life been so "meh, dissapointment" after three respectable M-Class flares at any point I have been watching, but I guess that is to be expected when the 9 day stretch from Friday May 3rd to Saturday May 11th saw 12!!! X-Class flares and an unbelieveable 74 M-Class flares. For reference solar cycle 24 saw a total of 49 X-Class flares which means in just over a week we saw around 1/4 of the total X-Class flare count from the entire solar cycle 24 which spanned from 2008 to 2019! Granted, some of those flares were quite a bit higher magnitude than the flares we have seen in this cycle, but as the intensitygrams above are showing you, this cycle is far from over. With that said, I would not be surprised if we continue to see the cycle within the cycle where the suns activity goes up and down in a rough pattern. Obviously right now is a busy stretch, but immediately before it activity was quiet and in fact near the eclipse the sun almost went spotless, IIRC we went almost a week with a single M-Class flare at one point. And then just like that, we are back. This needs more study, but I have been watching this pattern and anecdotally I do believe there is something to it. While SC24 was pretty muted relatively speaking, SC23 was a doozy. It was even termed to have a double peak solar maximum according to some. There was some controversy about how strong or active SC25 would be. NOAA predicted a down year, but not everyone was buying. Physicist Scott McIntosh predicted the opposite, an active cycle based on a theory he had been working identifying markers that would better predict the next cycle based on the time elapsed between termination events in cycles. Obviously he was correct. The bottom line is, if you were disappointed on saturday or sunday because you missed your chance to see the aurora, do not lose hope, and think positively, because we still have some good opportunites. You also might not realize this, but the aurora has taken numerous trips to lower latitudes, but has done so discreetly with little fanfare, but it has done so all the same. While this used to be reserved only for major storms, this is not the case so much anymore. I am very excited to see those active regions showing the growth they are. The size is not there yet, but the config is and the precdent for explosive growth recently, and not just for AR3663, but 3664 as well before it. When AR3664 was nearing the meridian, naturewalksunset predicted it would blow up after crossing and he nailed that call. Let's see if it happens again. What is a Termination Event and What Does it Mean? You may be wondering what a termination event is. A termination event is when the previous cycle ends absolutely with no outliers. During the solar cycle, the suns magnetic poles reverse and when this happens, the polarity of sunspots reverses with it. A termination event is when there are no longer any sunspots adhering to the previous polarity. Even after polarity reverses, there are still occaisionally sunspots which match the previous cycle polarity. This overlap has long been known, but Mr McIntosh realized that this was more than an overlap, that it was an interaction. A termination event is when there are no more opposite groups forming from the old cycle and the longer the time between termination events, the weaker the next cycle. SC23 did not want to end, and as a result there was a long stretch between the termination event of SC22 and SC23 which he theorized partially influenced SC24 to be a weaker than average cycle. The problem is it takes 11 years to test the theory, so what better time than the next solar cycle to go against the grain and put out a completely opposite forecast to NOAA? Well he won that bet because despite the NOAA prediction of a quiet cycle, it has been exactly what Mr McIntosh predicted. He did not predict a super overactive cycle like SC23, but he did predict an above average cycle, and appears to be vindicated in that theory, but surely SC26 will have a say. Well folks, I have to run. This is really all I could get done today, I am still digging out of a hole from last week, but I am still watching and I still have so much to share with you. I am noting the small uptick in seismic activity today as well as a new Indonesian explosive volcanic eruptionand am watching for further developments. I my heart is absolutely breaking for Brazil who are experiencing a flooding event that is unprecedented. They are not alone, there is a rash of extremes affecting our planet right now. Here is an article in AXIOS sort of taking inventory of some of the more recent examples. You will note its attributed to climate change, as is increasing seismic activity. Next they will say that climate change is increasing volcanic activity as well and responsible for changing the length of day. I am not saying they are wrong, but I am skeptical. As I stated, I do believe that humans have adversely impacted the planet and the climate and what I am saying does not get off the hook at all, but I am quite convinced there is more at work here and we must investigate it. May you have clear eyes and clear skies, AcA PS: I also have two cool photos from you. I took the first last night and what I like about it so much is you can see the suns rays in good detail adding a nice effect and the second was of the moon in the late hours of Saturday 5/11. It looked very strange is all I can say. Just an optical illusion but it looked sort of like a moon eclipse lol! The third is one of my favorite Aurora photos from Friday. Sun Rays on a Sun Day Weird Looking Moon Spooky Sky Taken at 3 AM EST 5/11 - Note how it looks like daylight towards the north horizon. |
2024.05.14 01:22 Nick_Reach3239 Why is it called viaduct or viaduct harbour?
According to the dictionary viaduct is a "type of long bridge or series of bridges, usually supported by a series of arches or on spans between tall towers". Were there such a structure in the area in the past?
submitted by Nick_Reach3239 to auckland [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 00:44 XxKrustiexX Imperium Technologies - Wants you - Recruiting all Timezone -
Imperium Technologies - PvP Null Sec New & Old I US/EUTZ
[ PvP focused with 100% SRP ] - No Life like Null Life -
Discover the rich content and deep social bonds of the 0.0 experience. We offer training and access to the highest end content available in New Eden. Become part of a gaming family that stretches back to the dawn of Eve. Join a rich tradition of combat pranks, territorial wars and, in general, causing as much trouble as we can, wherever we go.
In-game name: Bloodytears Damon
Discord: Archmage1006
IT Discord: https://discord.gg/QNBrxRqPap
submitted by XxKrustiexX to evejobs [link] [comments]
[ PvP focused with 100% SRP ] - No Life like Null Life -
Discover the rich content and deep social bonds of the 0.0 experience. We offer training and access to the highest end content available in New Eden. Become part of a gaming family that stretches back to the dawn of Eve. Join a rich tradition of combat pranks, territorial wars and, in general, causing as much trouble as we can, wherever we go.
- Come be a part of gaming history! Join an ancient nullsec Corp whose history stretches back to 2003.
- Newbros/Returning/Olds welcome, all can apply.
- 80% Buyback program for all your loot.
- 0.0 Life!!! vast area of null-sec spanning the Southeast of New Eden.
- Open boarders with all coalitions space.
- 20 years of knowledge and experience to help elevate your game.
- MANDATORY:
- Have microphone and comms software (Teamspeak, Mumble, Discord)
- PvP focused, We play hard, we fight hard. Must be willing and able to kill.
- Must be +18 years of age or older (family/friends exempt as long as they are mature).
In-game name: Bloodytears Damon
Discord: Archmage1006
IT Discord: https://discord.gg/QNBrxRqPap
2024.05.14 00:00 ClaimSalt1697 A MASTER LIST of real world tie-ins to ACOTAR: Part 2—World Map, Items, Terms & Other ✨🌙
-----------------
Part 1: Characters and Courts (sorry for those who already saw this post and now it's gone. I realized after publishing that Reddit formatting deleted a solid CHUNK of detail after the fact. Gimme a few days and I'll get it back up and published)
Part 2: World Map, Items, Terms & Other - YOU ARE HERE
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https://preview.redd.it/tblspn7am90d1.png?width=832&format=png&auto=webp&s=0e1c5d11b53736e3ac49b29e6734dba821f44e4e
Artist of Prythian map: P-dulcis on redbubble
https://preview.redd.it/jxxgjkfim90d1.png?width=842&format=png&auto=webp&s=00944156c7edd485265a4cad7f66c5ac8e41b31d
THE CAULDRON
https://preview.redd.it/pjo213ymm90d1.png?width=840&format=png&auto=webp&s=de57f0ba269bd4b48b2782eb380da90a8ba2d6eb
DAEMATI
submitted by ClaimSalt1697 to acotar [link] [comments]
⚠️ WARNING: Maasverse Spoilers—Proceed with Caution ⚠️
-----------------Part 1: Characters and Courts (sorry for those who already saw this post and now it's gone. I realized after publishing that Reddit formatting deleted a solid CHUNK of detail after the fact. Gimme a few days and I'll get it back up and published)
Part 2: World Map, Items, Terms & Other - YOU ARE HERE
-----------------
If this is the first post you've landed on, see Part 1 above for an introductory explanation to this two part post.
https://preview.redd.it/tblspn7am90d1.png?width=832&format=png&auto=webp&s=0e1c5d11b53736e3ac49b29e6734dba821f44e4e
UK + IRELAND
PRYTHIANA combination of Prydain, the old Welsh name for Britain, and Brython, which translates to “Ancient Britons” from Welsh.HYBERN
A riff of Hibernia, the Classical Latin name for Ireland.
Artist of Prythian map: P-dulcis on redbubble
ADDITIONAL EUROPEAN-PARALLEL LOCATIONS
ILLYRIAThe Ancient Greeks used the term Illyria to define a region in the western part of the Balkan Peninsula. The numerous peoples who populated those areas were known collectively as the Illyrians. The region itself is quite mountainous.THE MIDDLE
May refer to the Midlands, the central part of England, though geographically the Prythian map places the Middle central to Prythian, not central to England; with the Prythian inclusion of Scotland, the Middle on Prythian maps is located further north than the actual Midlands of England.UNDER THE MOUNTAIN
A potential nod to the Schiehallion, a cone-shaped mountain often referred to as the center of Scotland. It's name comes from the Gaelic Sìth Chailleann, meaning "fairy hill of the Caledonians." On the southwestern side of the mountain is said to lie the well-concealed Uamh Tom a' Mhòr-fhir, a cave serving as an entrance to the underworld.THE WESTERN ISLES
As the Schiehallion lies in the middle of Scotland (the Night Court) and not the middle of mainland UK (Prythian), the Sciehallion could instead be representative of Ramiel.
May refer to the Outer Hebrides, also known as the Western Isles, which is an island chain off the west coast of mainland Scotland. They are also sometimes known as Innse Gall, a Gaelic term meaning "islands of the foreigners/strangers" which was originally used by mainland Highlanders when the islands were ruled by the Norse.THE PRISON
ACOTAR role: The Prison is located in the Western Isles.
Though located in the Inner Hebrides of Scotland rather than the Outer, the Prison may be a nod to Beinn Shiantaidh, which is Scottish Gaelic for "holy mountain." It is located on the western side of the Island of Jura and is the second highest peak of the Paps of Jura.VALLAHAN
Fun fact: Pap is of Old Norse origin and means breast.
Valhalla is the hall of slain warriors in Norse mythology, located in Asgard, where those who die in combat live in peace under the leadership of the god, Odin. They are said to dwell in Valhalla until the events of Ragnarök, where they will then march out to fight in aid of Odin against the jötnar, a type of being in Germanic mythology.ADRIATA
ACOTAR role: Vallahan is a faerie territory located in the northwest portion of the Continent.
The Adriatic Sea is located in Southern Europe and separates the Italian Peninsula from the Balkan Peninsula. It contains more than 1,300 islands.BOG OF OORID
The Oorid Lough is a freshwater lake in the west of Ireland.CRETEA
Crete is the largest and southernmost island in Greece.LAPPLUND
ACOTAR role: Cretea is where Miryam and Drakon's people lived following the War.
Lapland is a geographic region in Northern Fennoscandia which covers much of the Nordic countries. It is also a province of Sweden and the largest region of Finland.ITICA
ACOTAR role: Lapplund is where the Cauldron was hidden.
Ithaca is an island featured in the Odyssey and was the island home of Odysseus. It is also a real island in Greece. The Kathara Monastery is located in Ithaca.MONTESERE
ACOTAR role: Itica is one of three temples where the feet of the Cauldron were hidden.
Montserrat is a mountain range near Barcelona.RAVENNIA
ACOTAR role: Montesere is a fae territory located in the Continent's NW and is considered generally wealthy. They allied with the loyalists in the War.
Ravenna is located in Northern Italy and was the capital of the Western Roman Empire.DUNMERE
ACOTAR role: Ravenna is a fae territory on the Continent and allied with the Loyalists during the War.
Dunmere is a hamlet in Cornwall, England.NEVA
ACOTAR role: Dunmere is a town located within the Night Court, between Velaris and the sea.
The Neva is the fourth-largest river in Europe and is located in northwestern Russia.SCYTHIA
ACOTAR role: Neva is one of the largest human cities on the Continent and is where the Archeron sisters' father travels to trade.
The Scythians were an ancient Eastern Iranic equestrian nomadic people who migrated from Central Asia to the steppes of modern-day Ukraine and Southern Russia.ROSEHALL
ACOTAR role: Scythia is one of the territories of the human lands on the Continent, ruled by Queen Vassa. They are said to be a horse loving people.
Rosehall is the name of a remote hamlet in the Scottish Highlands.
Fun fact: The 2nd Duke of Westminster acquired the Rosehall estate and his mistress at the time, Coco Chanel, redecorated the interior to her own liking. Winston Churchill, a close friend of the Duke, also visited the estate.
ACOTAR role: Rosehall is mentioned in ACOFAS and is theorized to be the place where Azriel's mother resides.
AFRICA-PARALLEL LOCATIONS
THE BLACK LANDBlack Land translates from Kemet, a popular ancient name for Egypt, which is derived from the color of the fertile black soil along the cultivated area of the Nile valley.THE ERYTHRIAN SEA
ACOTAR role: The Black Land is a region of the continent where human slaves were ruled over by a High Fae queen. Miryam and Drakon joined the mortals in the War and freed Miryam's people by crossing the desert and eventually the sea.
The Erythraean Sea, originally an Ancient Greek geographical designation, has been used as a name for the Red Sea which lies between Africa and Asia.
ACOTAR role: Drakon used his magic to split the Erythian Sea.
ASIA-PARALLEL LOCATIONS
XIANXi'an is the the most populous city in Northwest China snd the second most popular tourist destination in China.BHARAT
ACOTAR role: Xian is a Fae territory on the Continent and allied with the Loyalists during the War. A large majority of the Dawn Court is made of Fae from Xian, including Thesan's mother. Feyre remarks that Amren may have molded her mortal body after their peoples.
Bhārat is one of the two principal official short names for the Republic of India.RASK
ACOTAR role: The Archerons lost their fortune when their father's ships sank on the way to Bharat.
May refer to Rask, a city in Iran, that serves as both capital of its county and district.
ACOTAR role: Rask is a Fae territory on the Continent and allied with the Loyalists during the War.
ADDITIONAL LOCATIONS
VELARISPossibly derived from the Latin vēlo*,* meaning "to veil, cover, wrap" along with "to hide, conceal" and "to clothe in." Could also derive from the Latin vēlum, meaning "to veil, curtain" and also indicates a tarpaulin acting as cover for outdoor spaces.THE WALL
No singular reference, but the presence of a wall separating one race from another, often humans from mythical beings, is rife throughout history, mythology, and fantasy.THE MOONSTONE PALACE
One from each category that has loose ties to ACOTAR: (1) Hadrian's Wall, ie the Roman Wall, a defensive fortification of the Roman province of Britannia. It spanned from coast to coast, cutting across the entire width of Northern England. (2) In Norse mythology, the Master Builder asking for the hand of the goddess Freyja as payment for constructing a wall around Asgard to defend the gods. (3) The English village of Wall in Neil Gaiman's Stardust, named after the wall separating the land of Faerie from the mortal realm, highly guarded and cautioned against for mortals seeking to pass through.
Romans linked moonstone to the moon goddess Diana (goddess of wild animals and the hunt) and Ancient Greeks linked it to their lunar deities Artemis, Hecate, and Selene.SIDRA RIVER
Sidra is a name of Latin origin and means "Goddess of the stars" or "like a star."RAMIEL
Ramiel is a fallen Watcher, a type of Biblical angel, one of the 20 Watchers that rebelled against God by mating with mortal women, therefore creating the Nephilim (Shadowhunters, anyone?). Ramiel means "God has thundered." Ramiel is sometimes conflated with Remiel, also known as Jeremiel, meaning "God shall have mercy," as is listed as one of the seven Holy Angels. He is the archangel of hope and is responsible for divine visions and guiding the souls of the faithful into Heaven.POOL OF STARLIGHT
No plausible connection found, though there is a famous pool in Greek mythology—a pool Mnemosyne presided over in Hades, counterpart to the river Lethe. Dead souls would drink from Lethe to wipe their past lives from remembrance when reincarnated. Those who drank from Mnemosyne's pool remembered and halted their transmigration of the soul.ATHELWOOD
Ethel (also aethel) is an Old English word meaning "noble." Athelwood can mean "noblewood."GOLLIAN MOUNTAINS
ACOTAR role: Athelwood is Morrigan's estate located in the Night Court.
Göll is one of the named Valkyries from Norse mythology. Her name means "tumult," or "noise, battle."MYRMIDONS
ACOTAR role: The Gollian Mountains are where the Valkyries were slain during the War.
In Ancient Greek mythology, the Myrmidons were an Ancient Greek tribe. In the Iliad, they are the soldiers commanded by Achilles. Myrmidon has also come to mean "a follower or subordinate of a powerful person, typically one who is unscrupulous or carries out orders unquestioningly."CESERA
ACOTAR role: The Myrmidons are a set of mountains serving as the border between the Day Court and the Night Court from which the Illyrians migrated.
No direct reference found, but may allude to Caesarea, the name of numerous cities and locations throughout the Roman Empire.SANGRAVAH
ACOTAR role: Cesera is one of three temples where the feet of the Cauldron were hidden.
No direct reference found (and I lost my mind searching for one). Closest I came to was the similarly sounding Angharad, a feminine Welsh name, long associated with Welsh royalty, history, and myth, including Arthurian legend.GREENFIELD VILLAGE
ACOTAR role: Sangravah is one of three temples where the feet of the Cauldron were hidden.
No direct connection found, though Greenfield is the name of several villages of England.WINDHAVEN CAMP
ACOTAR role: Greenfield village is a neighboring village to where Feyre grew up and where Isaac Hale's wife is from.
No connection found, though a separate Windhaven also appears in Tower of Dawn in the TOG series. Altun—Windhaven being the rough translation—is located in a three-peaked mountain range and is the home of Sartaq's hearth-mother and family.THE WOLF'S DEN
Fun fact: Windhaven is the name of a science-fiction novel by George R. R. Martin and Lisa Tuttle following a group of humans who crash-landed on a foreign planet and learned to craft their own wings out of the spaceship wreckage.
No connection found, BUT fun fact: there is a named Wolf's Den castle in George R. R. Martin's A Song of Ice and Fire series (aka Game of Thrones) that now serves as a prison. "All the days were much the same inside the Wolf's Den, and any change was usually for the worse." A Dance with Dragons, Ch 29SILVERSPRING CREEK
ACOTAR role: The Wolf's Den is the name of the worst tavern in Velaris that Nesta is known to frequent.
No plausible connection found, BUT fun fact: "Silver Springs" is a song written by Stevie Nicks, performed by Fleetwood Mac, and is so strongly ACOTAR-coded even my non-loving playlist-to-book self can't deny it. If you want more bread crumbles that SJM is a Stevie Nicks fan, "Rhiannon" and it's lyric origins have potential ties to the Rhiannon of TOG.STRYGA'S CASTLE
You could be my silver springBlue-green colors flashin'I would be your only dreamYour shinin' autumn ocean crashin'
Time cas t a spell on you*, but you won't forget me*I know I could have loved youBut you would not let me
ACOTAR role: Silverspring Creek is a stream running through Feyre's human village, near where she hunted rabbits.
No direct reference found, but due to Stryga/the Weaver resembling a female demon akin to a vampire in Slavic mythology (see the Monster section above), it is possible Stryga's former home, before she was confined to her cottage, is reminiscent of Bram Stoker's 1897 Dracula and the Transylvanian Castle complete with three vampiric sister brides who entice men with their beauty and charm before proceeding to feed upon them.
The Night Sky
ARKTOSArktos, also written Arctus, means "bear" in Ancient Greek. Arktos was a centaur who fought against the Lapith spearmen. The Arktos Megale (aka Ursa Major, the Great Bear) is one of the original 48 constellations listed by Ptolemy who drew on earlier works by Greek, Egyptian, Babylonian, and Assyrian astronomers.CARYNTH
ACOTAR role: Arktos is one of the three regarded holy stars (the furthest left star) of the Illyrians and serves as part of the symbol for the Night Court. The echelon of Arktosian is reserved for Illyrians who survive the Blood Right but fail to reach Ramiel.
May refer to Corinth, an ancient city that was one of the largest and most important of Greece, or Carinthia, the southernmost Austrian state in the Eastern Alps, noted for its mountains and lakes.ORISTES
ACOTAR role: Carynth is one of the three regarded holy stars (the middle star) of the Illyrians and serves as part of the symbol for the Night Court. The echelon of Carynthian is reserved for Illyrians who scale the summit of Ramiel during the Blood Rite and are considered elite warriors.
Orestes (also spelled Orestes) means "stands on a mountain" and he is the subject of several Ancient Greek plays and myths concerning his madness and purification.Locations not listed: A slew of various more minor locations have not been listed, including the Four Market Squares of Velaris, certain cottages and houses, and even the Ironcrest Illyrian war-camp.
ACOTAR role: Orestes is one of the three regarded holy stars (the furthest right star) of the Illyrians and serves as part of the symbol for the Night Court. The echelon of Oristian is reserved for Illyrians who make it to the Ramiel during the Blood Rite but don't reach the top.
https://preview.redd.it/jxxgjkfim90d1.png?width=842&format=png&auto=webp&s=00944156c7edd485265a4cad7f66c5ac8e41b31d
THE CAULDRON
There are many magical cauldrons present in various mythologies, one being the Pair Dadeni in Welsh mythology, a magical cauldron able to resurrect the dead, and the coire ansic of Irish mythology, the cauldron of the chief god of the Tuatha Dé Danann, which never ran empty.TRUTH-TELLER
Possibly inspired by Fragarach, an Irish mythological sword known as "The Whisperer" or "The Answerer." It was the sword of Nuada, the first high king; it was said that no one could tell a lie with Fragarach at their throat and that the sword inflicting wounds from which no one could recover.THE HARP
May refer to the uaithne, the magical harp of the Dagda, the chief god of the Tuatha Dé Danann in Irish mythology. It could control men's emotions and change the seasons.THE MASK
In Egyptian culture, death masks were designed to guide the spirits of those mummified into the next world.THE UNKNOWN 4th TROVE ITEM
Seen in a vision by Nesta via Lathys, which we now know to be the Horn, and may refer to the Gjallarhorn of Norse mythology, the sound of which is said to herald the beginning of Ragnarok.ATARAXIA
Ataraxia, in Ancient Greek philosophy, was a state of calmness untroubled by mental or emotional disquiet, ie tranquility of the mind. It was considered the ideal mental state for soldiers entering battle.GWYDION
ACOTAR Role: Nesta's Made sword.
Gwydion is a name meaning "born of the trees" and is the given name of Gwydion fab Dôn, a magician, hero, and trickster of Welsh mythology. Caer Wydion, the castle of Gwydion, was the traditional Welsh name for the Milky Way.NARBEN
ACOTAR role: The Starsword and twin to Truth-Teller.
No direct reference found, though narben in German means "scar."OUROBOROS MIRROR
ACOTAR role: Narben is a lost sword from the Dread Trove.
The ouroboros is an ancient symbol of a serpent or a dragon eating its own tale, first present in ancient Egyptian iconography and the Greek magical tradition, the term itself deriving from Ancient Greek. It has been used frequently and extensively throughout fantasy literature. It often symbolizes the cycle of life, death, and rebirth.BOOK OF BREATHINGS
The Books of Breathing are a set of ancient Egyptian funerary texts that are intended to enable those deceased to continue their existence in the afterlife. It is a simplified form of the Book of the Dead.VERITAS ORB
Veritas is of Latin origin meaning "truth." It is the name for the Roman virtue of truthfulness and in Roman mythology, Veritas is the Goddess of Truth. Universities and colleges such as Harvard use the term veritas as their motto.SYMPHONIA
Symphonia is Greek in origin and was used to denote a variety of musical instruments.AMARANTHA'S NECKLACE AND RING (JURIAN'S FINGER AND EYE)
Jurian's finger bone and eye, kept by Amarantha, are reminiscent of relics and reliquaries, often religious in nature. Relics typically consist of the physical remains or personal affects of a saint and the reliquary is the container that holds them.FAEBANE
Possibly inspired by wolfsbane (aka aconite or monkshood), a poisonous flower ancient Greeks would poison arrows and bait with to hunt wolves. It is lethal and often fatal and is an oft-used plant and poison within the fantasy genre.
Fun fact: In Shakespeare's Hamlet, Hamlet himself was killed with an aconite-laced blade.
https://preview.redd.it/pjo213ymm90d1.png?width=840&format=png&auto=webp&s=de57f0ba269bd4b48b2782eb380da90a8ba2d6eb
DAEMATI
Potentially a combination of the Greek word dae (to give) and the concept of mati, labeled as "the evil eye" in Greek classical antiquity. Daemati may effectively mean "to give the evil eye."THE WEAVER'S SONG
The Weaver's song, sung when Feyre was stealing Rhysand's ring from her cottage, is similar to "The Twa Sisters," a traditional murder ballad dating back to mid 17th century England. It tells of two sisters who travel down to a body of water where the older one pushes the younger one in. A harp or a fiddle is then made out of the murdered sister's body, which plays itself and sings about her murder.
2024.05.13 23:55 No_Spot1496 Commuter ryker
Hey! I've been doing research for a while now more so the past two weeks on rykers vs Spyders etc. Rykers seem to be more in the price range I'm able to go but I'm looking at being able to commute 75miles each way for work best gas mileage, life span, wear and tear and so on. I understand being comfortable is not gonna be 100%. I'm curious to see which I guess version is best for this? I can go back roads pavemented or highway (preferably back roads) for most of the ride. With the area I live around there are summer storms but typically not too long. Any recommendations?
submitted by No_Spot1496 to canam_ryker [link] [comments]
2024.05.13 23:50 Spartabrave Kingmaker: A Game of Thrones in Brevoy [5e][Discord][ERP]
Kingmaker: A Game of Thrones in Brevoy
System: Dungeons & Dragons 5e
Format: Discord Text pbp
No. of Players: 5
[Notice: This is a 18+ campaign. It contains NSFW and adult elements.]
Lady Jamandi Aldori is issuing charters to several groups of adventurers, sending them south into the Stolen Lands to reopen old trade routes and defeat the bandits and monsters who have made them too dangerous to use. By sending free agents south, this swordlord of Rostland hopes to alter the political balance of power in Brevoy without sacrificing her own position or forces. Yet, as with most complex and brilliant plans, the future holds plenty of opportunities for disaster.
The application link is down below! I'm going to leave it open for a week so folks don't miss out. I will be checking it regularly, so if I find a bunch of folks I like over the first couple days, I'll reach out to them, but I'm sure we all know how these sorts of games go. People may drop out or prove unreachable, so even if you're not someone who hears back from me immediately, we might be writing together soon!
The Stolen Lands await you!
https://forms.gle/bnmHsUt2Qmq5D1jK8
submitted by Spartabrave to pbp [link] [comments]
System: Dungeons & Dragons 5e
Format: Discord Text pbp
No. of Players: 5
[Notice: This is a 18+ campaign. It contains NSFW and adult elements.]
The same message has appeared on bounty boards and in taverns across Brevoy.For generations, the Stolen Lands have spanned the southern border of Brevoy. Many attempts have been made to settle them, but to date, none have succeeded, making these 35,000 square miles of wilderness the largest swath of unclaimed land in the entire region. As tensions mount in Brevoy, one ambitious swordlord hopes to change that fact.
HEROES WANTED!
Those able of body and brave of heart are invited to the mansion of Lady Jamandi Aldori, Swordlord & Chief Defender of Restov, to embark on an expedition into the Stolen Lands.
Bandits and monsters have been allowed to infest our southern borders for far too long. Those selected will be divided into groups and given a charter to reopen old trade routes and secure the surrounding territory. The brave-hearted mercenaries and adventurers who choose to take on this quest will face unimaginable danger, but whomever succeeds shall receive honor, glory, and a noble title granting dominion over the lands they've claimed to pass on their children.
Lady Jamandi Aldori is issuing charters to several groups of adventurers, sending them south into the Stolen Lands to reopen old trade routes and defeat the bandits and monsters who have made them too dangerous to use. By sending free agents south, this swordlord of Rostland hopes to alter the political balance of power in Brevoy without sacrificing her own position or forces. Yet, as with most complex and brilliant plans, the future holds plenty of opportunities for disaster.
"When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. There is no middle ground."Hello! I'm a longtime DM and a huge fan of A Song of Ice & Fire. I'm looking to run a campaign that's heavily influenced by the series I hold so dear. If you're a casual fan who's only seen Game of Thrones or House or the Dragon, you're more than welcome! The main things I'm looking for here are quality roleplay and enthusiasm. If you've got that, I promise we can have a good game together.
"Winter is coming."Kingmaker is an Adventure Path originally designed by Paizo for the Pathfinder RPG but has been converted to be compatible with the 5th edition D&D ruleset. I'm taking so serious liberties with it but the bones of the adventure remain the same. Kingmaker is a high fantasy campaign that thrusts the player characters into a unique situation of building their own kingdom and carving out their own niche upon the world. You may be a scion of a lesser branch of the great families with ambitions that can't be hindered by your place in the succession. You could be a commoner whose witnessed your humble community suffer at the hands of the lawless bandits pillaging the countryside and will take on this great challenge so your family can live free. Perhaps you are a bastard child of a powerful figure and now seek to carve out your own kingdom knowing that you stand to inherit nothing you don't build for yourself.
"When the snows fall and the white winds blow, the lone wolf dies but the pack survives."I've got a couple of expectations for the characters that will be brought into the adventure. I am looking for characters with reasons to have a desire to venture into hostile territory and work as a team to build a kingdom. Good or evil doesn't matter but chaos doesn't serve to further the group. So, no chaotic alignment will be allowed. This is not the campaign for chaotic evil players looking to betray the other players, loners or free-spirited vagabonds.
"Backstabbing doesn't prepare you for a fight, and that's all the realm is now. Backstabbing and scheming and arse-licking and money-grubbing."Political intrigue is a pillar of the series inspiring this and a big part of my plans, but in order to keep charisma from being everyone's primary stat I will be using a reputation system to even the playing field when dealing with individuals of consequence. In certain circles, a knight renowned for their honor and bravery is going to be as respected and influential, if not more, as a traditional face will be anywhere else. I think this will do a lot to allow the party to have a proper balance of classes with no one feeling handicapped in the social aspects.
"Let me give you some counsel, bastard. Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you."You may have noticed the tag, and the catch is: This is an adult only game, featuring erotic roleplay where characters can engage in sexual activities with no fade-to-black, etc. Lewd events, plans, consequences, and more are all on the table in this campaign. If you've watched either of the shows on HBO, this probably isn't much of a surprise to you. I'd like to be clear that just because it's on the table, this game will not become a raunchy, never ending orgy. There is usually meaning behind how sex is used in the series and that's what I'm looking to emulate.
"Distrusting me was the wisest thing you've done since you climbed off your horse."GRRM often uses the intimate scenes to peel back layers to a character. Sometimes to paint them in a different light, other times to drive them further into the role he wishes to present them to the reader in. Some examples would be Tyrion's lingering trauma and emotional vulnerability, driving him to purchase the closest thing he believes he can have to real love being a way to earn Tyrion the reader's sympathy. Contrast that with Cersei's narcissism making her seek lovers, she can view as idealized male versions of herself, the only match worthy in her deranged mind. Or how Littlefinger justifies his pitiless ambition, being something forced on him by a cruel and unfair world that's kept him and his one true love apart by no fault of their own.
"Love is the death of duty."PCs are encouraged to find and nurture romantic relationships with other characters or NPCs. Weddings are considered the truest way of sealing alliances, after all. Beyond the love lives of the characters, there are many other scenarios. A corrupt noble might be willing to trade information to carry on an affair on their spouse. A sex scandal could undermine the legitimacy of a claimant in a contested succession. Barbarian raiders may attack a village under your protection and take the women as slaves. Spies might attempt to seduce you in order to secure a position in your court and feed information to a rival house. A neighboring tyrant might earn your ire when reports of him abusing his authority to take advantage of an unfortunate captive or innocent reaches you.
"The things I do for love."Because I'm sure it needs to be said. ERP will not be my main focus while running this; it may or may not even happen on my end. I'll already be responsible for the story, so trying to match everyone's taste in smut on top of that might be biting off more than I can chew. That being said, I'm all for your characters sharing a tent during the long weeks of adventuring because I think a good amount of sexual tension adds player investment and fun to the story. While I'm not promising anything, I'm not firmly ruling things out on my end either. You all could charm your way into a few NPC's pants to loosen a secret from their lips or secure a favor down the road. You might decide to blow your coins on prostitutes while visiting the capital. If the scene serves the story (or I'm just feeling horny that day), I may indulge you! Just wanted to make sure you're aware that just because I am open to ERP does not mean I'm making a commitment to provide it to everyone, expecting all players to take part in it, or putting it ahead of the actual campaign in any capacity.
"There are no other men like me. Only me."If it's not apparent by now, I'm very serious about making this game something great. I love the ASOIAF books; I love the adventure path; I love the cRPG, and I desperately want to do justice by all three influences. Expect a bit of gritty realism and tragedy in this story. Your triumphs will be hard fought. Your holdings will face constant peril. Your enemies will always be lurking with their knives out for the moment you drop your guard. However, the rewards for your success in this campaign are unlike any other. I truly don't think there is another adventure that matches the sense of accomplishment that comes from taking a stretch of hostile wilderness and carving your own thriving kingdom from it.
"Power resides where men believe it resides. No more and no less."A little bit on my approach to DMing this. I plan on running this very differently from traditional D&D 5e. Combat is obviously what the system does the most of, but if you've ever watched GoT or HotD you'd see the main characters don't draw their swords all that often. In fact, a lot of the main cast never have their own fight scenes. I like this less is more approach a great deal and think it'll bring a lot to the pbp experience. Outside of encounters with a named enemy, I won't be using initiative. This is so the RP isn't held up by any individual's schedule. I'll also be utilizing the minion rule from 4e where all the monsters have 1 HP. Their AC remains the same, so if you have trouble hitting them, the danger remains but low damage rolls won't cause encounters to drag unnecessarily.
"Hard truths cut both ways."Matching the tone of the books this campaign is inspired by will take collaboration. I want the heroes of this story to have lives that involve more than their swords and spells. If you’re just looking to roleplay a non-stop fantasy porno, this isn't the game for you. But if you are interested in writing a character who is enriched by getting to explore their desires, be influenced by lusts, make compromises out of attraction, and maybe even experience heartbreak if their trust and affection wound up in the wrong hands-- then you're exactly who I'm looking for!
"If I do not press my claim, my claim will be forgotten. I will not become a page in someone else's history book."If you can't be bothered to respond to the RP for days at a time, I'm going to kick you out! Plain and simple. I won't be reaching out. I won't be constantly giving you reminders. There will be no stoppages for you to get your shit together. It's a big world, and I'm not going to hesitate to find someone else interested in actively participating in the adventure if you go ghost. I understand that IRL always comes first, so if you have the common courtesy to reach out and explain your circumstances that prevent you from putting together a couple paragraphs every day, then I will still be replacing you, but I will move your character out of the story for you to pick up later on when you can. If you can't manage to let me know what's going on, then I'm just going to forget about you and move right along so everyone else can continue the fun!
"I have a tender spot in my heart for cripples, bastards and broken things."My plan is to be pretty rules-light with this campaign since while I run a lot of D&D, I haven't run that many text games. I'm still confident I can handle it, but I'm just throwing it out there in case there are bumps along the road. If you're more experienced in the pbp arena than I am, I'd greatly appreciate your advice as things are coming together. We will be using dndbeyond and the standard discord bots. In my experience, these games work a lot better when the story is put above mechanics, so keeping things to PHB races and PHB/XgtE subclasses. If you're looking to do some awesome game-breaker build you've theory crafted for months. This may not be the game for it. I don't plan on meticulously tracking things to make sure you get your sentinel feat trigger each turn.
“Oh, my sweet summer child, what do you know about fear?”Alright! That's my pitch. Sorry you had to read all that, but hopefully you're still interested and can see I don't have a problem handing out paragraphs, so this game ought to be in good hands. I look forward to reading your applications and will be leaving the form open for the next week while I work on the discord server.
“The night is dark and full of terrors.”I'll looking forward to playing with you. As well as hopefully some fun debates about who we're rooting for in HotD season 2 as it airs.
The application link is down below! I'm going to leave it open for a week so folks don't miss out. I will be checking it regularly, so if I find a bunch of folks I like over the first couple days, I'll reach out to them, but I'm sure we all know how these sorts of games go. People may drop out or prove unreachable, so even if you're not someone who hears back from me immediately, we might be writing together soon!
The Stolen Lands await you!
https://forms.gle/bnmHsUt2Qmq5D1jK8
“There is only one god, and His name is Death. And there is only one thing we say to Death: 'not today'.”
2024.05.13 23:37 Zarckhan I've recently returned to the game after a 3 year hiatus. How can I obtain legendary set blueprints?
Let me preface by saying: I'm currently f2p, and used to be a very low spender. Started playing early so over the span of 3 years playing I managed to get T5 and attain 75MIL Power. Equipment got released shortly before I quit, I didn't invest much in it. Now I've returned after a long break and I've been following the events like Ian's Ballad, Ceroli Crisis, Golden Kingdom etc... I always get crystal keys and no blueprints for the legendary set I'm striving for which is Eternal Empire. Could I be missing out on something or is this the only way to get these blueprints, and the chance is just that absurdly low? I recently spent all my gems on wheel of fortune getting some up to date commanders so I'm all out for now, should I save up gems for a specific event and crash out in it for the blueprints?
submitted by Zarckhan to RiseofKingdoms [link] [comments]
2024.05.13 23:11 verminbby My Story: How I watched my ex and love of my life loose his mind to this drug
Hey people. I wanted to share my long ass story about how nitrous used to be one of my most favorite things in the world and now my relationship with it is complicated and twisted.
A lot of this will tackle interpersonal relationship dynamics, but I’m trying to illustrate to the reader the progression of how this drug took my ex’s mind. This is more of a thorough essay about my experience than a rant. When I was going through what I went through at the time, I wished there was a story like this out there to help me know better and understand. This is how I watched the love of my life melt away his brain on this drug.
I will try and keep this brief, but it probably won't be. I wish to convey the addictiveness this drug can have and the toll it can take on your mind and body. In the summer of 2022 I met my then bf who introduced me to the rave scene and drug scene he was a part of. He really only used K and Nitrous (which I will refer to as N going forward). He told me about his 1.5 years of being addicted to K, but did not inform me of his also 1.5 years (at the time) addiction to N. He told me after meeting me he didn’t want to abuse K anymore so as far as I knew when we started dating he got better about that.
It all started very early in the relationship. We went to a weekend festival together and both found doing N together was so fun. We continued on using and abusing N every weekend, and sometimes many weekdays. Probably going through 6 or 8+ tanks a week, this went on for like 3 months. Sadly, I do look back on those days fondly, despite what would happen later down the line. We had so much fun together and yes sadly it bonded us in this weird way. Using it causes you to feel more open and positive in the beginning, and we had so many heartfelt and deep conversations. And it felt like a little special world we could go into together.
At the time I had no clue how much those small-medium sized tanks cost ($65 and up for just one where we live). And he never told me how much they cost, and didn’t ask me to chip in, so I had no idea he was throwing himself into financial ruin buying them all the time. Looking back I have no idea why I didn’t ask, I just figured they were only $25 or something, or his friend was giving them to him, and I was aware it was probably a poor financial decision, but figured he could bounce back after the summer. You have to understand I thought I had him figured out, but I didn’t really know him that well at this point, or know about the drug scene at all. Before this I really only drank and smoked weed with the occasional cid or shrooms trip.
Three months into us dating and abusing N we come to the conclusion we just need to stop and take a break from N as this had all become quite excessive. Still he doesn’t explain to me how much debt he is in from buying all of those tanks over the summer. Two months into the break and he’s starting to crack, asking for me to be okay with us using it regularly. I tell him that I think it’s okay for us to just do it once and awhile. It was hard to not cave in because truthfully I missed it as well, I myself was starting to feel the addictiveness of this drug, so I reserved it so that I only ever did it with him. We go back to doing it occasionally on the weekends. Over the span of 1 month my bf started to constantly complain of having nerve issues, his feet and legs and hands were numb, I also noticed that he seemed really depressed. This is when he started to experience the vitamin B deficiency, although both me and him didn’t realize this at the time.
Around this time is when he finally and unceremoniously reveals to me how much these things actually cost. This is the tricky aspect of his personality I would go on to experience more of. It was clear he was resentful towards me, that I had no idea how much money he was spending, but the reality is if I had known how much those things cost I would have ended it a lot sooner. I didn’t even understand how he had the ability to spend so much money, I don’t even want to do the math. I would find out later he would just take out credit cards and max them out. In addition to him doing them with me occasionally, he was also doing them behind my back, which I had caught him doing several times and was always forgiving over this.
So, because of this constant spending he was in a substantial amount of debt. What he told me at the time was around $6,000. Knowing him, this was probably a generous assessment. This is definitely a point in the story where I should have left him. Clearly he was developing this addiction towards N and spent an ungodly amount of money that was beyond even my comprehension. But, I was head over heels and believed that he could figure this out. People go into debt all the time, I would tell myself. But I told him, this all needed to outright stop. No more N, not even occasionally. Unfortunately while he of course agreed to my face I have to suspect now, he was doing it behind my back all the time. Around this time he wouldn’t come home from work until 7 or 7:30 which didn’t make sense as his hours at work would fluctuate from time to time, but he was usually always off at 5. He would lie and say his work was very busy and made him stay later, which I believed at the time.
Maybe about a month later we are in bed together sleeping, it’s the middle of the night. He wakes me up and explains he literally cannot feel his feet or legs and has been having trouble walking for the past several days. I take him to the ER that night. This night and the following weeks after were some of the most heartbreaking and emotionally terrifying times of my life so far. At this time neither of us had any idea or reason to suspect N was the reason for this. We actually talked to the doctor there and ran tests for over 3 hours, he got an MRI and a spinal tap which was so hard to watch being done to him. It wasn’t until I desperately did research on my phone in the hospital room and suddenly see all of these remarks and reddit posts and studies about N causing paralysis and nerve damage. I tell my bf and the doctor and they have no trouble assessing that is what is causing this. They give him a regiment of vitamin B shots as you typically do in this situation. The doctor even said that they hope they can stop permanent damage from happening, because if not he may lose control of his legs and it may spread to his pelvic area (IE dick don’t work) etc, he had to do physical therapy and see a drug counselor.
The following days and weeks after I was constantly on edge worrying and wondering if my bf and love of my life would lose his ability to walk. Thankfully, the treatment took and he didn’t even end up needing physical therapy. This is when I truly believe or would like to hope he actually quit and wasn’t doing N behind my back. Unfortunately it wouldn’t matter, as I’ve learned, a lot of symptoms of N abuse don’t show themselves until after you stop. Shortly after this event is when our relationship took a nosedive. He had also ditched the drug counselor. To compensate for no N he was drinking so often. He started to become aggressive and violent. I remember it all started in a fight where he got real close and in my face and stared me down to try and intimidate me. In a way it was both terrifying and laughable (because he’s only a few inches taller than me), I couldn’t even comprehend the kind of person he had turned into. After that came the months and months of never ending name calling, insults, degradation, and constant arguments over every little thing I did. He became so addicted to the high of his power trip of making me feel small and weak he would find any excuse to fly into a rage at me, even when we were tripping on mushrooms together.
Nothing was ever the same after that. We didn’t go out, didn’t do dates, and every activity together felt like it was all a big chore to him. I could look in his eyes and see he was constantly thinking about N, and when he would do it next. He really changed, and what I am now realizing is he was probably starting to experience the effects of pure brain damage. My close friends who knew him even agree with me that there is a huge change in his demeanor around this time in April of 2023.
I also want to add more info about his bizarre behavior. He started to develop an unhealthy obsession with social media, scrutinizing what I posted and what he posted. He started to obsess over current events of any kind, any breaking story or ongoing conflict and he would rant and rant about the current state of the world and destruction of humanity all the time. He started to get obsessed with mental health and psychology and pathologize me and himself and other people in our lives. He would send me 10 videos everyday about mental health and relationships and expect me to reply and have a response for every single one like a book report. This obsession with the destruction of humanity turned into a paranoia about the world, he would often say no one understands him, and he is all alone. He turned on his best friends of several years because he was paranoid they were racists or had bad morals (they were all pleasant and nice people who enjoy edgy humor from time to time). There was no more middle ground for anything, you either loved something fully, or hated it fully. Somewhere down the line he actually got his account banned on Instagram for the craziest reason. He couldn’t stop or control himself from having heated arguments with random strangers in comments sections, of almost any video of any topic. He would insult people there constantly.
Here is another big mistake I made.I allowed him to live with me, and we moved in together. At this point we had been dating for a year. Before this I lived on my own and didn’t want to renew my lease, and he was living with his dad who was abusive and financially took advantage of him. At the time I was convinced that this bad behavior would go away if he could get away from his dad and his toxic household. Well the toxicity only followed. That summer we went to another weekend festival and he revealed to me when we got there he had purchased N and brought it. I was so conflicted as I myself had missed it quite a lot, and I had to deny myself my healthy regulated usage of it in order to not trigger him. I caved again and said we could do it only for this weekend. You may not at all be surprised to learn it didn’t end that way.
After the festival everything truly fell apart. He continued to buy tanks of N and do them behind my back constantly. He would say he was just going to his car to talk to his friends, or his mom, and be gone for hours. Because he was totally abusing me and I had no idea because I was under his spell of manipulation, I had no recourse. Any comment of mine asking why he was gone for so long, why can’t he just talk to his friends inside our apartment, I’ll go in the other room for privacy, was only met with complete indifference. These questions only pissed him off. He would say it’s because I was so exhausting and demanding he needed a break from me. When I would call him when he’s on one of these “excursions,” he would every so often mute the call while I was talking or in a silent moment. I eventually realized he was hitting the tank every time he muted himself. When I finally called him out on this he gaslit me and told me he just does this all the time because he coughs and clears his throat, fyi he had never done this before in our relationship. Because I had no recourse I just had to agree and move on. And because his mind was deteriorating more and more each day he would go on to make randomly muting himself in calls as a common, thing so as to keep up the facade he told me. Actual crazy behavior.
He even started doing K again, he would clearly be f-ed out of his mind by both K and N, and stumble around our apartment with crazy red bulging eyes and again and again tell me he was just drunk. Around this time is when he finally divulges to me not only had he been abusing K for the 1.5 years before he met me, he had also been abusing N for 1.5 years before he met me. And it wasn’t actually the case that he only “began” to become addicted to N when we started dating and doing it together. This really started to put a lot into perspective for me, and it made sense how he had almost paralyzed himself over this, now at this current time 3+ year addiction to these substances, and it made me realize how psychologically and cognitively he was failing based on changes in his personality. You also have to understand he explained to me before he met me, he was doing 1.5-2 grams of K or more and N, EVERYDAY.
And still at this time the name calling, insults and manipulation continued. He of course was no longer experiencing any true “high” from the N anymore, it would just simply dull his senses. It was like a stereotypical violent alcoholic husband comes home from the bar and berates his wife, kind of situation, except with N. And I became obsessed with figuring out how to get him to stop and go back to the loving person I remembered meeting and loving. I began to do very toxic things, going through his backpack, going through his car, and constantly always finding tanks and balloons and all kinds of paraphilia everywhere. I would find tanks in our recycling bin, like he actually thought I wouldn’t notice. I would come home late from being with friends and catch him passed out on the couch with an empty tank in his hand. He couldn't be left alone anymore. If he wasn’t with me, 100% of the time he was sitting in his car doing N. At this point in time there was no forgiveness, I was completely broken. I would yell and scream at him or wake him up and demand he stop and choose me or the drugs, all terrible things to be doing. I know that.
Eventually it got so bad I felt I had no other recourse other than to call and inform his mother of his behavior and what he had been doing all this time. Me doing this is probably what saved his life, as there was never anyway I was going to get through to him myself. But it did not save his mental health. Even having his mother involved didn’t stop any of it. He still went out and bought it behind my back like nothing happened. Another painful painful aspect of how his personality had changed is he would constantly have crazy back and forth mood swings, one minute showing me the sweet man I had fallen in love with, thanking me and praising me for having stepped in and put a stop to this, the next minute he hated me and I was the worst thing in his life and I could never tell what was even real anymore.
But did I leave, oh no, that would have been the smart thing to do.Instead at the time I was seeing a therapist who also specializes in couples therapy. I get us started with counseling and during our second session he gets called out by my therapist and yells and screams and berates her, it was actually insane. That is when things really ended between us. He moved out and moved into his moms apartment 30 minutes away that night. Even though the breakup was traumatizing and painful I still had hope that even if he isn’t with me, now he will receive help from his mother. Well, she didn’t place him in any special drug counselor program or rehab, she just severely cut off his finances so that he could pay off his debts, which she had bought back from several banks so it would not gain more and more interest. I do believe now his debt may be somewhere in the $10,000-$20,000 range. So now he, as an almost 30 year old man, needs to ask his mother in order to buy or purchase anything. Somehow, despite all of this I would learn he was continuing to do N and K.
Amazingly, we still tried briefly to even make our relationship work after he moved out. At this point he has mastered the art of manipulation and being fake, and convinced me he was getting better, he had even started to look better too, but he was still up to his old BS. He came over to the apartment once for us to have a mini date. Because he went on and on about how he was getting more and more into walks he said he was going to take a quick stroll around the block to get some fresh air. Well a quick stroll turns into 30 minutes, and I start to notice his car is gone from our street. I call him and he says now he is sitting in his car talking to his mom, I tell him I don’t see his car and it’s been a long time, he clearly had left to buy N. He becomes irate and claims he simply moved his car down the block for “reasons” and I was in the wrong for being accusatory and not trusting him. P.S. I went down the block and he just was not there. This guy is either absolutely crazy or thinks I’m some kind of imbecile, or both. It basically ended from there.
We tried to be civil, but he cannot control himself from completely going ballistic on me anymore, or his mother. And it is so painful when he is remorseful and doesn’t remember all the things he said to me. At this point I have had to realize I am basically talking to and trying to reason with a mentally disabled person. The fun loving, easy going, creative, altruistic, thoughtful, smart and attentive man I met doesn’t exist anymore, and I don’t think he will ever come back. All that remains is the shell of a confused and angry person.
Some small things to address, how it came to be that he abused these drugs all the time before he met me is because his best friend was a drug dealer and in the beginning would give him all of these things for free. Once he was hooked and doing it everyday it seemed he would stop at no end to spend money and buy them. Yes K was definitely a contributor into his mild psychosis but I still think it would have happened even from the N abuse alone, based on research I’ve been doing lately. And yes I have to admit I think he had bad and malignant psychological traits before abusing drugs, and doing that made it all worse.
So that is the story of how I watched this man ruin his life, and scare away maybe the only person who could withstand experiencing all of his BS and still wanted to love and help him. There are SO MANY things I too should have done differently. There is also an age gap between us of 3 years, so I naively thought he had a better handle on his life than he really did. I do find it hard to understand how people can be so addicted at times, but in the end like my ex, everyone is trying to chase some kind of feeling or experience that came with it, rather than the drug itself.
Thank you for reading if you made it to the end.
TLDR: Two years ago I started dating a guy who wasn’t honest with me about his 1.5 years of Nitrous abuse before we started dating. He was a sweet and honest and caring man when I met him. Sadly most of our relationship was spent on doing lots of Nitrous together. He eventually developed health problems like a vitamin B deficiency and even almost got paralysis and permanent nerve damage, which was hard for me to watch and witness. His health issues didn’t deter him away from Nitrous and he was constantly buying tanks and doing it behind my back. The more he abused Nitrous the more abusive towards me he became as a person. Our relationship crumbled and not even getting his mom involved helped. He was also clearly experiencing psychosis and mental deterioration. We broke up because he yelled and screamed at my therapist and he had to move in with his mom. Moving in with his mom didn’t stop his addiction even though she cut off his finances.
Even when we tried to make the relationship work he still abused it anyway. I would now consider him a mentally disabled person and I don’t recognize who he even is anymore after 3+ years of abusing Nitrous almost everyday. Please use Nitrous responsibly or don't at all.
submitted by verminbby to NitrousOxideRecovery [link] [comments]
A lot of this will tackle interpersonal relationship dynamics, but I’m trying to illustrate to the reader the progression of how this drug took my ex’s mind. This is more of a thorough essay about my experience than a rant. When I was going through what I went through at the time, I wished there was a story like this out there to help me know better and understand. This is how I watched the love of my life melt away his brain on this drug.
I will try and keep this brief, but it probably won't be. I wish to convey the addictiveness this drug can have and the toll it can take on your mind and body. In the summer of 2022 I met my then bf who introduced me to the rave scene and drug scene he was a part of. He really only used K and Nitrous (which I will refer to as N going forward). He told me about his 1.5 years of being addicted to K, but did not inform me of his also 1.5 years (at the time) addiction to N. He told me after meeting me he didn’t want to abuse K anymore so as far as I knew when we started dating he got better about that.
It all started very early in the relationship. We went to a weekend festival together and both found doing N together was so fun. We continued on using and abusing N every weekend, and sometimes many weekdays. Probably going through 6 or 8+ tanks a week, this went on for like 3 months. Sadly, I do look back on those days fondly, despite what would happen later down the line. We had so much fun together and yes sadly it bonded us in this weird way. Using it causes you to feel more open and positive in the beginning, and we had so many heartfelt and deep conversations. And it felt like a little special world we could go into together.
At the time I had no clue how much those small-medium sized tanks cost ($65 and up for just one where we live). And he never told me how much they cost, and didn’t ask me to chip in, so I had no idea he was throwing himself into financial ruin buying them all the time. Looking back I have no idea why I didn’t ask, I just figured they were only $25 or something, or his friend was giving them to him, and I was aware it was probably a poor financial decision, but figured he could bounce back after the summer. You have to understand I thought I had him figured out, but I didn’t really know him that well at this point, or know about the drug scene at all. Before this I really only drank and smoked weed with the occasional cid or shrooms trip.
Three months into us dating and abusing N we come to the conclusion we just need to stop and take a break from N as this had all become quite excessive. Still he doesn’t explain to me how much debt he is in from buying all of those tanks over the summer. Two months into the break and he’s starting to crack, asking for me to be okay with us using it regularly. I tell him that I think it’s okay for us to just do it once and awhile. It was hard to not cave in because truthfully I missed it as well, I myself was starting to feel the addictiveness of this drug, so I reserved it so that I only ever did it with him. We go back to doing it occasionally on the weekends. Over the span of 1 month my bf started to constantly complain of having nerve issues, his feet and legs and hands were numb, I also noticed that he seemed really depressed. This is when he started to experience the vitamin B deficiency, although both me and him didn’t realize this at the time.
Around this time is when he finally and unceremoniously reveals to me how much these things actually cost. This is the tricky aspect of his personality I would go on to experience more of. It was clear he was resentful towards me, that I had no idea how much money he was spending, but the reality is if I had known how much those things cost I would have ended it a lot sooner. I didn’t even understand how he had the ability to spend so much money, I don’t even want to do the math. I would find out later he would just take out credit cards and max them out. In addition to him doing them with me occasionally, he was also doing them behind my back, which I had caught him doing several times and was always forgiving over this.
So, because of this constant spending he was in a substantial amount of debt. What he told me at the time was around $6,000. Knowing him, this was probably a generous assessment. This is definitely a point in the story where I should have left him. Clearly he was developing this addiction towards N and spent an ungodly amount of money that was beyond even my comprehension. But, I was head over heels and believed that he could figure this out. People go into debt all the time, I would tell myself. But I told him, this all needed to outright stop. No more N, not even occasionally. Unfortunately while he of course agreed to my face I have to suspect now, he was doing it behind my back all the time. Around this time he wouldn’t come home from work until 7 or 7:30 which didn’t make sense as his hours at work would fluctuate from time to time, but he was usually always off at 5. He would lie and say his work was very busy and made him stay later, which I believed at the time.
Maybe about a month later we are in bed together sleeping, it’s the middle of the night. He wakes me up and explains he literally cannot feel his feet or legs and has been having trouble walking for the past several days. I take him to the ER that night. This night and the following weeks after were some of the most heartbreaking and emotionally terrifying times of my life so far. At this time neither of us had any idea or reason to suspect N was the reason for this. We actually talked to the doctor there and ran tests for over 3 hours, he got an MRI and a spinal tap which was so hard to watch being done to him. It wasn’t until I desperately did research on my phone in the hospital room and suddenly see all of these remarks and reddit posts and studies about N causing paralysis and nerve damage. I tell my bf and the doctor and they have no trouble assessing that is what is causing this. They give him a regiment of vitamin B shots as you typically do in this situation. The doctor even said that they hope they can stop permanent damage from happening, because if not he may lose control of his legs and it may spread to his pelvic area (IE dick don’t work) etc, he had to do physical therapy and see a drug counselor.
The following days and weeks after I was constantly on edge worrying and wondering if my bf and love of my life would lose his ability to walk. Thankfully, the treatment took and he didn’t even end up needing physical therapy. This is when I truly believe or would like to hope he actually quit and wasn’t doing N behind my back. Unfortunately it wouldn’t matter, as I’ve learned, a lot of symptoms of N abuse don’t show themselves until after you stop. Shortly after this event is when our relationship took a nosedive. He had also ditched the drug counselor. To compensate for no N he was drinking so often. He started to become aggressive and violent. I remember it all started in a fight where he got real close and in my face and stared me down to try and intimidate me. In a way it was both terrifying and laughable (because he’s only a few inches taller than me), I couldn’t even comprehend the kind of person he had turned into. After that came the months and months of never ending name calling, insults, degradation, and constant arguments over every little thing I did. He became so addicted to the high of his power trip of making me feel small and weak he would find any excuse to fly into a rage at me, even when we were tripping on mushrooms together.
Nothing was ever the same after that. We didn’t go out, didn’t do dates, and every activity together felt like it was all a big chore to him. I could look in his eyes and see he was constantly thinking about N, and when he would do it next. He really changed, and what I am now realizing is he was probably starting to experience the effects of pure brain damage. My close friends who knew him even agree with me that there is a huge change in his demeanor around this time in April of 2023.
I also want to add more info about his bizarre behavior. He started to develop an unhealthy obsession with social media, scrutinizing what I posted and what he posted. He started to obsess over current events of any kind, any breaking story or ongoing conflict and he would rant and rant about the current state of the world and destruction of humanity all the time. He started to get obsessed with mental health and psychology and pathologize me and himself and other people in our lives. He would send me 10 videos everyday about mental health and relationships and expect me to reply and have a response for every single one like a book report. This obsession with the destruction of humanity turned into a paranoia about the world, he would often say no one understands him, and he is all alone. He turned on his best friends of several years because he was paranoid they were racists or had bad morals (they were all pleasant and nice people who enjoy edgy humor from time to time). There was no more middle ground for anything, you either loved something fully, or hated it fully. Somewhere down the line he actually got his account banned on Instagram for the craziest reason. He couldn’t stop or control himself from having heated arguments with random strangers in comments sections, of almost any video of any topic. He would insult people there constantly.
Here is another big mistake I made.I allowed him to live with me, and we moved in together. At this point we had been dating for a year. Before this I lived on my own and didn’t want to renew my lease, and he was living with his dad who was abusive and financially took advantage of him. At the time I was convinced that this bad behavior would go away if he could get away from his dad and his toxic household. Well the toxicity only followed. That summer we went to another weekend festival and he revealed to me when we got there he had purchased N and brought it. I was so conflicted as I myself had missed it quite a lot, and I had to deny myself my healthy regulated usage of it in order to not trigger him. I caved again and said we could do it only for this weekend. You may not at all be surprised to learn it didn’t end that way.
After the festival everything truly fell apart. He continued to buy tanks of N and do them behind my back constantly. He would say he was just going to his car to talk to his friends, or his mom, and be gone for hours. Because he was totally abusing me and I had no idea because I was under his spell of manipulation, I had no recourse. Any comment of mine asking why he was gone for so long, why can’t he just talk to his friends inside our apartment, I’ll go in the other room for privacy, was only met with complete indifference. These questions only pissed him off. He would say it’s because I was so exhausting and demanding he needed a break from me. When I would call him when he’s on one of these “excursions,” he would every so often mute the call while I was talking or in a silent moment. I eventually realized he was hitting the tank every time he muted himself. When I finally called him out on this he gaslit me and told me he just does this all the time because he coughs and clears his throat, fyi he had never done this before in our relationship. Because I had no recourse I just had to agree and move on. And because his mind was deteriorating more and more each day he would go on to make randomly muting himself in calls as a common, thing so as to keep up the facade he told me. Actual crazy behavior.
He even started doing K again, he would clearly be f-ed out of his mind by both K and N, and stumble around our apartment with crazy red bulging eyes and again and again tell me he was just drunk. Around this time is when he finally divulges to me not only had he been abusing K for the 1.5 years before he met me, he had also been abusing N for 1.5 years before he met me. And it wasn’t actually the case that he only “began” to become addicted to N when we started dating and doing it together. This really started to put a lot into perspective for me, and it made sense how he had almost paralyzed himself over this, now at this current time 3+ year addiction to these substances, and it made me realize how psychologically and cognitively he was failing based on changes in his personality. You also have to understand he explained to me before he met me, he was doing 1.5-2 grams of K or more and N, EVERYDAY.
And still at this time the name calling, insults and manipulation continued. He of course was no longer experiencing any true “high” from the N anymore, it would just simply dull his senses. It was like a stereotypical violent alcoholic husband comes home from the bar and berates his wife, kind of situation, except with N. And I became obsessed with figuring out how to get him to stop and go back to the loving person I remembered meeting and loving. I began to do very toxic things, going through his backpack, going through his car, and constantly always finding tanks and balloons and all kinds of paraphilia everywhere. I would find tanks in our recycling bin, like he actually thought I wouldn’t notice. I would come home late from being with friends and catch him passed out on the couch with an empty tank in his hand. He couldn't be left alone anymore. If he wasn’t with me, 100% of the time he was sitting in his car doing N. At this point in time there was no forgiveness, I was completely broken. I would yell and scream at him or wake him up and demand he stop and choose me or the drugs, all terrible things to be doing. I know that.
Eventually it got so bad I felt I had no other recourse other than to call and inform his mother of his behavior and what he had been doing all this time. Me doing this is probably what saved his life, as there was never anyway I was going to get through to him myself. But it did not save his mental health. Even having his mother involved didn’t stop any of it. He still went out and bought it behind my back like nothing happened. Another painful painful aspect of how his personality had changed is he would constantly have crazy back and forth mood swings, one minute showing me the sweet man I had fallen in love with, thanking me and praising me for having stepped in and put a stop to this, the next minute he hated me and I was the worst thing in his life and I could never tell what was even real anymore.
But did I leave, oh no, that would have been the smart thing to do.Instead at the time I was seeing a therapist who also specializes in couples therapy. I get us started with counseling and during our second session he gets called out by my therapist and yells and screams and berates her, it was actually insane. That is when things really ended between us. He moved out and moved into his moms apartment 30 minutes away that night. Even though the breakup was traumatizing and painful I still had hope that even if he isn’t with me, now he will receive help from his mother. Well, she didn’t place him in any special drug counselor program or rehab, she just severely cut off his finances so that he could pay off his debts, which she had bought back from several banks so it would not gain more and more interest. I do believe now his debt may be somewhere in the $10,000-$20,000 range. So now he, as an almost 30 year old man, needs to ask his mother in order to buy or purchase anything. Somehow, despite all of this I would learn he was continuing to do N and K.
Amazingly, we still tried briefly to even make our relationship work after he moved out. At this point he has mastered the art of manipulation and being fake, and convinced me he was getting better, he had even started to look better too, but he was still up to his old BS. He came over to the apartment once for us to have a mini date. Because he went on and on about how he was getting more and more into walks he said he was going to take a quick stroll around the block to get some fresh air. Well a quick stroll turns into 30 minutes, and I start to notice his car is gone from our street. I call him and he says now he is sitting in his car talking to his mom, I tell him I don’t see his car and it’s been a long time, he clearly had left to buy N. He becomes irate and claims he simply moved his car down the block for “reasons” and I was in the wrong for being accusatory and not trusting him. P.S. I went down the block and he just was not there. This guy is either absolutely crazy or thinks I’m some kind of imbecile, or both. It basically ended from there.
We tried to be civil, but he cannot control himself from completely going ballistic on me anymore, or his mother. And it is so painful when he is remorseful and doesn’t remember all the things he said to me. At this point I have had to realize I am basically talking to and trying to reason with a mentally disabled person. The fun loving, easy going, creative, altruistic, thoughtful, smart and attentive man I met doesn’t exist anymore, and I don’t think he will ever come back. All that remains is the shell of a confused and angry person.
Some small things to address, how it came to be that he abused these drugs all the time before he met me is because his best friend was a drug dealer and in the beginning would give him all of these things for free. Once he was hooked and doing it everyday it seemed he would stop at no end to spend money and buy them. Yes K was definitely a contributor into his mild psychosis but I still think it would have happened even from the N abuse alone, based on research I’ve been doing lately. And yes I have to admit I think he had bad and malignant psychological traits before abusing drugs, and doing that made it all worse.
So that is the story of how I watched this man ruin his life, and scare away maybe the only person who could withstand experiencing all of his BS and still wanted to love and help him. There are SO MANY things I too should have done differently. There is also an age gap between us of 3 years, so I naively thought he had a better handle on his life than he really did. I do find it hard to understand how people can be so addicted at times, but in the end like my ex, everyone is trying to chase some kind of feeling or experience that came with it, rather than the drug itself.
Thank you for reading if you made it to the end.
TLDR: Two years ago I started dating a guy who wasn’t honest with me about his 1.5 years of Nitrous abuse before we started dating. He was a sweet and honest and caring man when I met him. Sadly most of our relationship was spent on doing lots of Nitrous together. He eventually developed health problems like a vitamin B deficiency and even almost got paralysis and permanent nerve damage, which was hard for me to watch and witness. His health issues didn’t deter him away from Nitrous and he was constantly buying tanks and doing it behind my back. The more he abused Nitrous the more abusive towards me he became as a person. Our relationship crumbled and not even getting his mom involved helped. He was also clearly experiencing psychosis and mental deterioration. We broke up because he yelled and screamed at my therapist and he had to move in with his mom. Moving in with his mom didn’t stop his addiction even though she cut off his finances.
Even when we tried to make the relationship work he still abused it anyway. I would now consider him a mentally disabled person and I don’t recognize who he even is anymore after 3+ years of abusing Nitrous almost everyday. Please use Nitrous responsibly or don't at all.