A man comes home from work one day. He's hungry. Not just "I could eat something" hungry, but "I'd eat the fucking hind legs of a donkey" hungry.
He goes straight to the fridge. Fucking thing is empty. Shit.
His mind races, but he doesn't panic. Where's the nearest place he can get some food?
It comes to him.. bingo.. hops back in the car, goes and gets some food. Job done.
On the way home, he stops at the supermarket and stocks up on food to fill the fridge. Then he goes about his evening contentedly with a full belly.
His neighbour comes home from work the same day. He's hungry. Not just "I could eat something" hungry, but "I'd eat the fucking hind legs of a cow" hungry.
He goes straight to the fridge. Fucking thing is empty. Shit.
He slams the fridge door shut. Screams at it because it has no food for him.
He opens up his laptop. Looks up pictures of food. Burgers, steaks, pizzas. Drools all over himself and the keyboard. He's fucking ravenous, but there's no food in the fucking fridge, so he goes hungry.
Same thing happens next day because he still hasn't done any shopping. And the next and the next. He grows resentful of the fridge. Stops looking at it because it just reminds him of what he doesn't have. And all he can think about is food.
Eventually, he dies from starvation.
How many of you here die of starvation on a daily basis? How many of you hops in his car when the fridge is empty and actually go get some fucking food? You forgot to hunt
I hope you get the analogy.

I had the most sweetest cat in the world. She was really sweet. So beautiful and so kind. Someone left her in a box downstairs in my lobby. As she was a very tiny kitten at the time. Her and I hit it off immediately. We loved each other very much. She would always cuddle with me and show me sooo much love. Cuddle with me under the covers wake me up in the morning with soft meows. Chill with me in the toilet while I shit every morning and just sit in my lap and purr. She was the sweetest girl in the world and I never thought I would lose her. One day thought I just started squeezing her neck out of frustration and I threw her to the floor. She hurt her leg really badly. But she recovered from it. This happened a few times again. And she was fine each time. Every time I felt a deep shame and I cried and apologized to her. I was angry and I really wish I never started doing this to her because it eventually led to her death. I got angry because the house was a mess and my dog peed and shitted in his cage everywhere and she sat in it. I squeezed her neck again but I think it snapped this time because she was bleeding from her mouth and nose. I started panicking because she wasn’t waking up or moving like she normally would. I wasn’t trying to end her life I was just really angry. And I really wish I hadn’t because I miss her so much. I miss her meow and her climbing onto my back whenever I bent over into the fridge. Her attacking my hands and feet. And all the love and comfort she brought me. I been super stressed out. And I wish I never got into the habit of hurting her because now everyday I have to come home and see she’s not here. Now I feel more grief than guilt. I have so many photos and pictures of us and it pains me so bad that she’s not here and it’s all because of me. I tried to resuscitate her I googled cpr on a cat. I tried to remove the blood from her nose and throat so she could breathe. And when it finally hit me I just cried so hard and begged god to give her back to me and promised I’d never hurt another animal in my life. I kept on over and over again. And nothing was working. I called my sister and told her what happened. I was going to call the vet but I knew it was too late and she was deprived of oxygen for too long. And she was bleeding from her nose and mouth. And I just cried and cried and cried for hours hysterically. She was one of the many loves of my life. My heart hurts so much and finding the will to go on is so hard atp. I just wish she was here with me. I put her in a box with her collar and her favorite toys and gave her the literal shirt off my back. And I just couldn’t stop crying for her. She deserved a better life and I wish she could’ve lived a fuller one. I kissed her so many times and told her mommy is so sorry held her in my arm as my sister tried to pry me away from her but I just couldn’t leave her, I wrote a note underneath the shoe box lid for her. And put a bunch of flowers in there for her. I loved that cat so much and I just wish this never happened. She was so important to me. My heart breaks everyday for you my princess I loved you so much and never intended for this to happen. You made my life so much better so much brighter and easier. You should be here right now and I’m so sorry. I’m sitting in our usual morning spot typing this where you’d normally greet me and show me so much love. You were one of the best things to happen to me one of my favorite things. N I promise to take better care of myself so when I come across another sweet girl like you I can take care of her just like you deserved. I really don’t want to go on without you. And I’m so hurt and I don’t know if I’m ever gonna make it back from this. I love you so much my baby chicken I’m sorry I did this to you. I love you more than anything I’d do anything to get you back.

I need help from strangers, although in the comments you always seem to have an answer for everything. That you know things I don't know. That you have lived more than me in every way. How is it possible? Well, I need you to explain to me what it is.
I need you to explain to me what is wrong with me. I am an affable, intelligent person and until now, I thought I was physically attractive. I am a bit special in my way of being, so there are people who just don't get along with me. But I can assure you that when people have given me the opportunity and have approached me to get to know me in depth, good friendships have always been forged, although in the end for one reason or another everyone went their own way at some point. When I gain confidence with people, they tend to treasure me (and I treasure them, although as I said, at some point I seem to stop doing so). I feel like, I can be me with my quirks, which at that point in the relationship, I tend to like.
I recently got dumped. I loved her. I wasn't happy but I loved her. It hurt me. I became so focused on the relationship, I lost friends and I lost ambition. Now I have regained my ambition, I am going to take a master's degree that interests me a lot and at the same time I am going to combine it with my career in finance. I feel again ambition and interest in the things I am passionate about, and I like to have recovered that part. But I feel very lonely. For context, I am not living in my hometown, but in the capital of my country for career and work reasons, and that is where the best opportunities are offered.
I have given all this context so that you know a little bit of why I have degraded myself so much to make this post. Because of what I said, and because of something else.
I thought it was attractive. Not something spectacular, but attractive. At 18 I was flirting almost every time I went out to party. In my early 20s I was flirting quite successfully, there have even been a few women who have approached me. In fact, flirting in non-party contexts, I was pretty bad, so I limited myself to actively approaching when I was drunk and partying, and in my day to day life I let them approach me in one way or another: through friends, following me on instagram and initiating conversation, once working in a fashion store they asked for my phone number.... All of this has made me think I'm attractive. I, in the mirror, honestly, see someone attractive.
However, nowadays, for the last few years actually, I seem to be invisible to women.
I notice a lot at the gym. I love gym girls. I always look at them, slyly. But mostly I look at them to see if they look at me. And they almost always ignore me. I've come to understand that they're not always going to approach me, and that I have to be brave and approach them myself. But before I do, I look for even the slightest sign. Something to encourage me to do so. A minimum of signs of interest, of attraction. And I never find it. I seem to be invisible. Sometimes they even move away from me, although I always keep a prudent and respectful distance while we are trainning.I don't understand anything.
Since my ex-girlfriend left me, everything goes wrong. Everything. I am broken.
I love you guys, even though I don't know you. I attach some picture of me, completely random pictures. I spend 0 seconds taking pictures of myself. Don't be mean to me, I'm not having a good time.
https://imgur.com/ibgAH92
https://imgur.com/DYqpfxE
https://imgur.com/Xffooan
https://imgur.com/TOmTyL8

The Big List

Prices are firm. Please only redeem the portion of a code you are paying for. All codes are for immediate redemption. All Disney & Sony codes include points unless otherwise noted.
I accept Cashapp, Venmo, Zelle & PayPal F&F without any notes. Comment & pm if interested. Thanks!

🦝

MISC

Barbie 4K [2023] $6 (MA)
Batwoman season 1 HD [2019] $6 (Vudu)
Help, The SD [2011] $3 (iTunes/ports)
X-Men Trilogy HD [X-Men, X2 & The Last Stand] $8 (MA)

🦝

$5 4K UHD

Ant Man & The Wasp [2018] (MA + 200 points)
Eternals [2021] (MA + 200 points)
John Wick 1-3 (iTunes)
Monsters Inc. [2001] (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Mulan [1998] (MA + 200 points)
Princess Bride, The [1987] (iTunes)
Wizard Of Oz, The [1939] (MA)

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$4 4K UHD

Aliens [1986] (iTunes/ports)
Avengers: Infinity War (MA + 200 points)
Beauty & The Beast [2017] (MA + 200 points)
Captain Marvel [2019] (MA + 200 points)
Frozen 2 [2019] (MA + 200 points)
Halloween [2018] (MA)
Mission: Impossible [1996] (Vudu)
Mission: Impossible 2 [2000] (Vudu)
Ralph Breaks The Internet [2018] (MA + 200 points)
Scarface [1989] (iTunes/ports)
Smokey & The Bandit [1977] (iTunes/ports)
Solo: A Star Wars Story [2018] (MA + 200 points)
Spider-Man: Homecoming (MA + Sony points)
Thor [2011] (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Thor: The Dark World [2013] (MA + 200 points)
Transformers: Rise Of The Beasts (iTunes)
Venom [2018] (MA + Sony points)

🦝

$5 HD

127 Hours [2010] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Adventures Of Ichabod & Mr. Toad, The [1949] (MA + 150 points)
Elemental [2023] (MA + 150 points)
Hannibal season 1 [2013] (Vudu)
How To Train Your Dragon 3-Movie Collection (MA)
Hunchback Of Notre Dame, The [1996] (MA + 150 points)
Hunchback Of Notre Dame 2, The [2002] (MA + 150 points)
Lady & The Tramp II: Scamps Adventure [2001] (MA + 150 points)
Mickey's Christmas Carol [1983] (MA + 150 points)
Mr. Popper's Penguins (MA or Google Play/ports)
Robots [2005] (MA, iTunes or Google Play/ports)
Succession season 1 (iTunes)
Veep season 5 (iTunes)
Veep season 6 (iTunes) or both for $8
Warriors, The [1979] (Vudu or iTunes)

🦝

$4 HD

Creator, The [2023] (MA + 150 points)
Day After Tomorrow, The [2004] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Hitman [2007] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Iron Claw, The [2023] (Vudu)
Justice League x RWBY: Superheroes & Huntsmen Part One [2023] (MA)
Locke [A24] (Vudu)
Marlowe [2023] (MA)
Monsters vs. Aliens [2009] (MA)
Nightcrawler [2014] (iTunes/ports)
Paw Patrol: The Mighty Movie (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Rosemary's Baby [1968] (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Wish [2023] (MA + 150 points)
Wonka [2023] (MA)

🦝

$3️⃣ Codes

$3 4K UHD

Aladdin [2019] (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Alien [1979] (iTunes/ports)
Angel Has Fallen (Vudu or iTunes)
Assassin's Creed [2016] (MA)
Back To The Future Part II [1989] (iTunes/ports)
Back To The Future Part III [1990] (iTunes/ports)
Big Hero 6 (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Bourne Identity, The [2002] (iTunes/ports)
Bourne Ultimatum, The (iTunes/ports)
Cinderella [2015] (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Dracula Untold (MA)
Dredd (Vudu)
Fantastic Four [2015] (iTunes/ports)
Fast & The Furious, The [2001] (MA)
Frozen II [2019] (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Gemini Man (Vudu)
Guardians Of The Galaxy [2014] (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Hacksaw Ridge (Vudu)
Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard, The [2021] (Vudu or iTunes)
Interstellar (iTunes)
John Wick (Vudu)
John Wick: Chapter 2 (Vudu)
Jurassic Park [1993] (iTunes/ports)
Jurassic Park III [2001] (MA)
Keeping Up With The Joneses (iTunes/ports)
Little Mermaid, The [1989] (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Logan Lucky [2017] (iTunes/ports)
Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol (Vudu)
Moana (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
mother! [2017] (iTunes)
Planes, Trains & Automobiles (iTunes)
Prometheus (iTunes/ports)
Rango [2011] (iTunes)
Revenant, The [2016] (iTunes/ports)
Scrooged (iTunes)
Sicario (Vudu)
Snitch (Vudu)
Spiral: From The Book Of Saw (Vudu or iTunes)
Star Wars: Rise Of Skywalker (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Thor: The Dark World (iTunes/ports + 150 points)
Toll, The [2021] (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Top Gun (iTunes)
Wolf Of Wall Street, The (Vudu)

🦝

$3 HD

101 Dalmatians [1961] (MA + 150 points)
Alvin & The Chipmunks: The Squeakquel [2009] (MA)
Angry Birds Movie 2, The [2019] (MA + Sony points)
BFG, The [2016] (MA + 150 points)
Birdman [2014] (MA, iTunes or Google Play/ports)
Birth Of The Dragon [2017] (MA)
Black Adam [2022] (MA)
Breaking Bad season 6 (Vudu)
Cats & Dogs 3: Paws Unite (MA)
Chronicle [2012] (MA)
Color Purple, The [2023] (MA)
Desperation Road [2023] (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Disneynature: Bears [2014] (MA + 150 points)
Friday The 13th, The [1980] [Theatrical] (Vudu HD or iTunes 4K)
Fruitvale Station (Vudu)
Ghostbusters II [1989] (MA + Sony points)
Goosebumps 2 [2018] (MA + Sony points)
Grown Ups 2 (MA + Sony points)
I Am Vengeance: Retaliation [2020] (Vudu or iTunes)
Insidious: Chapter 3 (MA + Sony points)
I, Tonya [2017] (MA)
Line Of Duty [2019] (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Little House On The Prairie season 5 (Vudu)
London Has Fallen (iTunes/ports)
Lone Ranger, The [2013] (MA + 150 points)
Meg 2: The Trench, The [2023] (MA)
Mortal Kombat Legends: Cage Match (MA)
Northman, The [2022] (MA)
Orange Is The New Black season 1 (Vudu)
Phoenix Forgotten (MA, iTunes or Google Play/ports)
Planes: Fire & Rescue [2014] (MA + 150 points)
Project Ithaca [2019] (Vudu or Google Play)
Promised Land [2012] (iTunes/ports)
Promising Young Woman [2020] (MA)
Rambo III [1988] (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Ray [2004] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Rocky Horror Picture Show, The [1975] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Searching [2018] (MA + Sony points)
Sin City (Vudu)
Slender Man [2018] (MA + Sony points)
Snow White & The Seven Dwarfs [1937] (MA + 150 points)
Spider-Man: Into The Spiderverse (MA + Sony points)
Stoker [2013] (MA)
Stuber [2019] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Superfly [2018] (MA + Sony points)
Tyler Perry's Madea Goes To Jail (Vudu or Google Play)
Venture Bros: Radiant Is The Blood Of The Baboon Heart [2023] (MA)
Walking Dead season 9, The (Vudu or Google Play)
White Boy Rick [2018] (MA + Sony points)
Wolverine, The [2013] [Unleashed Extended Edition] (MA, iTunes or Google Play/ports)
World's End, The [2013] (iTunes/ports)
Yesterday [2019] (MA)
Zombieland: Double Tap [2019] (MA + Sony points)

🦝

$2 Codes

💲2️⃣ HD

10 Minutes Gone (Vudu 4K or iTunes 4K)
12 Years A Slave (MA or Google Play/ports)
13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers Of Benghazi (iTunes 4K)
1917 [2019] (MA)
21 Jump Street (MA + Sony points)
2 Guns (iTunes/ports 4K)
31 [2016] (Vudu)
About Last Night [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (MA)
Action Point [2018] (Vudu)
After Earth [2013] (MA + Sony points)
Age Of Adaline, The (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Alien Covenant (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA/GP)
All Eyez On Me [2017] (iTunes)
Allied [2016] (iTunes 4K or Vudu HD)
Aloha [2015] (MA + Sony points)
Alpha [2018] (MA + Sony points)
Alpha & Omega 2: A Howl-lday Adventure (Vudu)
Alvin & The Chipmunks: The Road Chip (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Amazing Spider-Man, The [2012] (MA)
America: Imagine The World Without Her (Vudu)
American Assassin [2017] (iTunes 4K or Vudu/GP HD)
American Girl: McKenna Shoots For The Stars [2012] (MA or iTunes/ports)
American Hustle [2013] (MA + Sony points)
American Reunion [Unrated] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (Vudu or iTunes)
Annie [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Ant Man & The Wasp [2018] (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Arrival [2016] (Vudu)
Assassin's Creed (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Avengers: Infinity War (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Bad Boys For Life (MA + Sony points)
Bad Words [2014] (iTunes/ports)
Barbie & The Secret Door [2014] (iTunes/ports)
Battleship [2012] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Baywatch (iTunes 4K)
Beauty & The Beast [1991] (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Beauty & The Beast [2017] (MA + 150 points/iTunes option is expired)
Before I Fall [2017] (MA)
Before I Go To Sleep [2014] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Beirut [2018] (MA)
Ben-Hur [2016] (Vudu)
Best Man Holiday, The [2013] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Between Worlds [2018] (Vudu or Google Play)
Black Panther [2018] (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Blockers [2018] (MA)
Bohemian Rhapsody (MA or Google Play/ports)
Book Club [2018] (iTunes 4K)
Boss Baby, The [2017] (MA)
Bourne Identity, The (MA)
Bourne Legacy, The (iTunes/ports 4K)
Boy, The [2016] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Breakthrough [2019] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Bridesmaids [Theatrical] (iTunes/ports)
Broken City [2013] (MA)
Bumblebee (iTunes 4K or Vudu HD)
Cabin In The Woods, The (iTunes 4K)
Captain America: Civil War (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Captain America: The Winter Soldier (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Captain Phillips [2013] (MA + Sony points)
Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie (MA)
Carrie [2013] (Vudu or Google Play)
Case For Christ, The [2017] (MA)
Change-Up, The [2011] [Unrated] (iTunes/ports)
Christopher Robin [2018] (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Contraband (iTunes/ports)
Counselor, The [2013] [Theatrical] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Croods, The [2013] (MA)
Curse Of Chucky [2013] [Unrated] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Daddy's Home (Vudu)
Daddy's Home 2 (Vudu)
Danny Collins (iTunes/ports)
Darkest Hour [2017] (MA)
Darkest Minds, The [2018] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Dark Tower, The [2017] (MA + Sony points)
Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Dead In Tombstone [Unrated] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Deadpool 2 [2018] (MA)
Deepwater Horizon (iTunes 4K)
Despicable Me 2 (iTunes/ports 4K)
Despicable Me 3 [2017] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Devil's Due [2014] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Die Hard [1988] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Divergent Series: Allegiant, The (iTunes 4K or Google Play HD)
Django Unchained (Vudu)
Doctor Strange [2016] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Dog's Journey, A [2019] (MA)
Dolittle [2020] (MA)
Dom Hemingway (MA or Google Play/ports)
Downton Abbey [2019] (MA)
Dracula Untold [2014] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Dream House [2011] (iTunes/ports)
Dredd [2012] (Vudu or Google Play)
Duff, The (iTunes or Google Play)
Edward Scissorhands (MA or Google Play/ports)
Emoji Movie, The [2017] (MA + Sony points)
Ender's Game (iTunes 4K or Vudu/GP HD)
Endless Love [2014] (iTunes/ports)
Epic [2013] (MA, iTunes or Google Play/ports)
Equalizer, The [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Equalizer 2, The (MA + Sony points)
Escape From Planet Earth (Vudu)
Ex Machina (Vudu)
Exodus: Gods & Kings (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Fate Of The Furious [F8] [Theatrical] (MA 4K or iTunes/ports 4K)
Fences [2016] (iTunes 4K)
Ferdinand [2017] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Fifty Shades Darker [2017] [Unrated] (MA 4K)
Fifty Shades Freed [2018] [Theatrical] (MA)
Fifty Shades Of Grey (iTunes/ports 4K)
Fighter, The [2010] (iTunes)
Finding Dory (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Flight [2012] (Vudu or iTunes)
Footloose [2011] (Vudu or iTunes)
Frozen Ground, The [2013] (Vudu)
Fury [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Game Of Thrones season 2 (Vudu)
Get Out [2017] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Ghostbusters [2016] [Theatrical & Extended] (MA + Sony points)
Ghost Team One [2013] (Vudu or iTunes)
Gifted [2017] (MA or Google Play/ports, iTunes option is expired)
G.I. Joe: Retaliation (iTunes 4K)
Gods Not Dead 2 [2016] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Gods Of Egypt (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Greatest Showman, The [2017] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Grey, The [2012] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol.2 (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Hacksaw Ridge (Vudu or Google Play/iTunes option expired)
Hail, Caesar [2016] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Halloween [2018] (MA)
Hanna [2011] (iTunes/ports)
Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters [Unrated] (Vudu)
Happytime Murders, The [2018] (iTunes 4K)
Hateful Eight, The (Vudu or Google Play)
Heat, The [2013] [Theatrical] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Heaven Is For Real [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Hell Or High Water (iTunes 4K)
Hercules [2014] (iTunes 4K or Vudu HD)
Here Comes The Boom [2012] (MA + Sony points)
Hitman's Bodyguard, The (Vudu or Google Play/iTunes option is expired)
Home Alone 2: Lost In New York (MA, iTunes or Google Play/ports)
Homefront [2013] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Honey 2 [2011] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Hop [2011] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Host, The [2013] (iTunes/ports)
Hotel Transylvania [2012] (MA + Sony points)
How To Train Your Dragon 2 (MA)
Hugo [2011] (Vudu or iTunes)
Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1, The (iTunes 4K or Google Play HD)
Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 2, The (iTunes 4K or Vudu or Google Play HD)
I Can Only Imagine [2018] (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Ice Age: Continental Drift (MA)
Ides Of March, The [2011] (MA)
Imitation Game, The (Vudu)
Impossible, The [2012] (Vudu)
Indiana Jones & The Raiders Of The Lost Ark (Vudu)
Inside Out [2015] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Insidious: Chapter 2 (MA + Sony points)
Instant Family [2018] (iTunes 4K)
Internship, The [2013] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Into The Woods [2014] (MA + 150 points)
Invisible Man, The [2020] (MA)
I Still Believe [2020] (iTunes 4K or Vudu/GP HD)
Jackass 3 [Theatrical] (Vudu or iTunes)
Jack Reacher: Never Go Back (Vudu)
Jarhead 2: Field Of Fire [Unrated] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Jason Bourne [2016] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Jigsaw [2017] (iTunes 4K or Vudu/GP HD)
John Wick (iTunes 4K)
John Wick 1 & 2 (Vudu or Google Play)
John Wick: Chapter 2 (iTunes 4K)
John Wick Chapter 3: Parabellum (iTunes 4K) or all 3 iTunes for $5
Joy [2015] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Jumanji: Welcome To The Jungle (MA + Sony points)
Jurassic Park III (MA)
Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom (MA)
Kingsman: The Golden Circle (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Kingsman: The Secret Service (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Labor Day [2014] (Vudu or iTunes)
La La Land (iTunes 4K)
Last Knights [2015] (Vudu)
Last Witch Hunter, The [2015] (iTunes 4K or Google Play)
Les Misérables [2012] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Life [2017] (MA + Sony points)
Life Of Pi [2013] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Lion King, The [2019] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Lockout [2012] [Unrated] (MA + Sony points)
Logan [2017] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Logan Lucky [2017] (MA)
Longest Ride, The (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Looper [2012] (MA + Sony points)
Lorax, The [2012] (MA)
Love, Simon [2018] (MA)
Lucy [2014] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Magnificent Seven, The [2016] (Vudu)
Mama [2013] (iTunes/ports)
Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again [2018] (MA)
Marauders (Vudu)
Marine 4: Moving Target, The [2015] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Mary Poppins [1964] (MA + 100 points)
Mary Poppins Returns [2018] (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Maze Runner, The [2014] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Maze Runner: The Scorch Trials (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Mechanic: Resurrection (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Men In Black 3 (MA + Sony points)
MI-5 [2015] (Vudu)
Mile 22 (iTunes 4K)
Million Ways To Die In The West, A [Unrated] (iTunes/ports)
Mindgamers [2017] (MA)
Minions [2015] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Mission Impossible: Fallout (iTunes 4K)
Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol (iTunes 4K)
Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation (iTunes 4K)
Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Miss You Already [2015] (Vudu)
Moneyball [2011] (MA + Sony points)
Money Monster [2016] (MA + Sony points)
Monuments Men, The [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Mortal Instruments: The City Of Bones, The [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Mother's Day [2016] (MA)
Mr. Peabody & Sherman [2014] (MA)
Mulan [2020] (MA + 150 points)
Mummy, The [2017] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Murder On The Orient Express [2017] (MA or Google Play/ports)
My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2 (iTunes/ports)
Neighbors [2014] (iTunes/ports)
Noah [2014] (Vudu or iTunes)
Non-Stop [2014] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Now You See Me 2 (iTunes 4K or Google Play HD)
Nurse Jackie season 7 (Vudu)
Nut Job, The [2014] (iTunes/ports)
Oblivion [2013] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Orange Is The New Black season 2 (Vudu)
Oranges, The [2012] (MA)
Ouija [2014] (MA)
Pain & Gain [2013] (Vudu)
Paranormal Activity [2009] [Theatrical] (Vudu or iTunes)
Paranormal Activity 2 [Unrated Director's Cut] (Vudu or iTunes)
Paranormal Activity 3 [Extended] (Vudu or iTunes)
Paranormal Activity 4 [Unrated] (iTunes)
Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension [Unrated] (Vudu)
Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones [Theatrical] (Vudu or iTunes)
Paranorman [2012] (iTunes)
Passengers [2016] (MA + Sony points)
Patriots Day (Vudu or Google Play/iTunes option is expired)
Paul [2011] [Unrated] (iTunes/ports)
Percy Jackson: Sea Of Monsters (MA, iTunes or Google Play/ports)
Pet Sematary [2019] (iTunes 4K or Vudu HD)
Pitch Perfect (iTunes/ports 4K)
Pitch Perfect 2 (iTunes/ports 4K)
Pitch Perfect 3 (MA)
Planes [2013] (MA + 150 points)
Premium Rush [2012] (MA + Sony points)
Prince, The [2014] (Vudu)
Prometheus (MA or Google Play/ports, no iTunes option)
Proud Mary [2018] (MA)
Purge, The [2013] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Purge: Anarchy, The [2014] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Purge: Election Year, The [2016] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Quiet Place, A [2018] (iTunes 4K)
Ralph Breaks The Internet [2018] (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Rambo: Last Blood (Vudu 4K or iTunes 4K)
Redemption [2013] (Vudu)
Red Dawn [2012] (Vudu or Google Play)
Replicas [2019] (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Riddick [2013] [Unrated] (iTunes/ports)
Rings [2017] (Vudu or iTunes)
Risen [2016] (MA + Sony points)
Rise Of The Guardians [2011] (MA)
Risen [2016] (MA + Sony points)
Robin Hood [2018] (iTunes 4K or Vudu/GP HD)
Rock Dog (iTunes)
Rocketman [2019] (iTunes 4K)
Roger Corman's Death Race 2050 [2017] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Runner Runner [2013] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Rush [2013] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Saban's Power Rangers (iTunes 4K or Vudu/GP HD)
Safe House [2012] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Scoob! [2020] (MA)
Scorpion King 3: Battle For Redemption (iTunes/ports)
Search Party [2013] (iTunes/ports)
Secret: Dare To Dream, The [2020] (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Secret Life Of Pets, The (MA 4K or iTunes/ports 4K)
See No Evil 2 [2014] (Vudu)
Sex Tape [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Show Dogs [2018] (MA)
Sicario (iTunes 4K)
Silent House [2012] (iTunes/ports)
Sing [2016] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Sinister (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Skyscraper [2018] (MA)
Smurfs: The Lost Village [2017] (MA + Sony points)
Snow White & The Huntsman [2012] [Extended] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Sparkle [2012] (MA)
Spider-Man: Far From Home [2019] (MA + Sony points)
Spider-Man: Homecoming [2017] (MA + Sony points)
Spy [2015] [Unrated] (MA, iTunes or Google Play/ports)
Star Trek [2009] (iTunes 4K)
Star Trek: Beyond (iTunes 4K)
Star Wars: The Force Awakens (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Star Wars: The Last Jedi [2017] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA + 150 points)
Step Up All In [2014] (Vudu)
Step Up Revolution (Vudu or Google Play)
Straight Outta Compton [Unrated] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Super 8 (Vudu)
Super Buddies (MA without points)
Taken 3 [Unrated] (MA, iTunes or Google Play/ports)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out Of The Shadows (iTunes 4K)
Terminator: Genisys (iTunes 4K)
Texas Chainsaw [2013] (Vudu)
Thing, The [2011] (iTunes/ports)
Think Like A Man Too [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Titanic (Vudu)
Top Gun (Vudu)
Tower Heist [Theatrical] (iTunes/ports)
Tremors: A Cold Day In Hell (MA)
Tremors: Shrieker Island (MA)
Trolls: World Tour [2020] (MA)
True Grit [2010] (Vudu or iTunes)
Turbo [2013] (MA)
Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 1 (iTunes 4K)
Tyler Perry's A Madea Family Funeral (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Underworld: Awakening [2012] (MA + Sony points)
Underworld: Blood Wars [2016] (MA + Sony points)
Valerian & The City Of A Thousand Planets (Vudu)
Venom [2018] (MA + Sony points)
Vice [2015] (Vudu)
Walk Among The Tombstones, A (iTunes/ports)
Warcraft [2016] (iTunes/ports 4K)
War For The Planet Of The Apes [2017] (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
War Room [2015] (MA + Sony points)
Wedding Ringer, The [2015] (MA + Sony points)
We Die Young [2019] (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
When The Game Stands Tall [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Whiplash [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Wolf Of Wall Street (iTunes 4K)
Woman In Black, The [2012] (MA)
Wonder [2017] (Vudu/GP HD or iTunes 4K)
Wonder Park [2019] (iTunes 4K or Vudu HD)
Woodlawn [2015] (MA)
World War Z (iTunes 4K)
X-Men: Apocalypse (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
X-Men: Days Of Future Past (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Zero Dark Thirty (MA + Sony points)
Zookeeper's Wife, The (iTunes/ports)
Zootopia (MA without points)

🦝

💲2️⃣ SD

127 Hours (iTunes/ports)
All About Steve (iTunes/ports)
Black Swan (iTunes/ports)
Bride Wars (iTunes/ports)
Crazy On The Outside (iTunes/ports)
Dragonball: Evolution [2009] (iTunes/ports)
Dr. Seuss’ Horton Hears A Who! (ITunes/ports)
Hitman [2007] [Unrated] (iTunes/ports)
Love & Other Drugs (iTunes/ports)
Max Payne [2008] [Unrated] (iTunes/ports)
Texas Rising season 1 (Vudu)
This Means War (iTunes/ports)
Unstoppable [2010] (iTunes/ports)

🦝

$1 Codes

💲1️⃣ HD

2 Guns (MA)
Alex Cross (Vudu)
Bad Moms [2016] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Battleship [2012] (MA)
Big Hero 6 (Google Play/ports)
Book Club (Vudu)
Butler, The [2013] (Vudu)
Captain America: Civil War (MA only without points/no iTunes option)
Deadpool (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA/GP)
Despicable Me 2 (MA)
Despicable Me 3 (MA)
Divergent (iTunes 4K or Vudu/GP HD)
Divergent Series: Insurgent, The (iTunes 4K or Vudu HD)
Duff, The [2015] (Vudu)
Expendables 2, The (iTunes 4K or Vudu/GP HD)
Expendables 3, The [Theatrical] (iTunes 4K or Google Play HD)
Fast & Furious [2009] (MA)
Fast & Furious 6, The [Extended] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Fast Five [Extended] (MA)
Fate Of The Furious, The [8] [Theatrical] (MA)
Fences [2016] (Vudu)
Frozen [2013] (MA + 150 points/no iTunes option)
Furious 7 [Extended] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Girls Trip [2017] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Good Day To Die Hard, A (MA or Google Play/ports)
Gunman, The [2015] (MA)
Hell Or High Water (Vudu or Google Play)
Hillsong: Let Hope Rise [2016] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Hunger Games, The [2012] (iTunes 4K or Google Play HD)
Hunger Games: Catching Fire, The (iTunes 4K or Google Play HD)
Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1, The (Vudu)
I, Frankenstein (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Independence Day: Resurgence (iTunes/ports 4K or HD MA)
Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit (Vudu)
Jason Bourne (MA)
Jurassic Park [1993] (MA)
Jurassic World (iTunes/ports 4K)
Leprechaun: Origins (Vudu)
Les Misérables [2012] (MA)
Lone Survivor [2013] (iTunes/ports 4K)
Lost World: Jurassic Park, The (MA)
Maggie [2015] (Vudu)
Minions [2015] (MA)
Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation (Vudu)
Mud (Vudu)
Now You See Me [Extended] (Vudu or Google Play) or [Theatrical] (iTunes)
Other Woman, The [2014] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Parental Guidance [2012] (MA)
Red 2 (iTunes 4K)
Ride Along 2 (MA or iTunes/ports)
RIPD Rest In Peace Department (MA)
Safe [2012] (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Secret Life Of Pets, The (MA)
Shack, The [2017] (Vudu, iTunes or Google Play)
Skyfall (Vudu or Google Play)
Snitch (iTunes 4K or Vudu/Google Play HD)
Son Of God [2014] (MA or Google Play/ports)
Star Trek: Beyond (Vudu)
Star Trek: Into Darkness (iTunes 4K)
Taken 2 (MA)
Ted [Unrated] (MA or iTunes/ports) or [Theatrical] (iTunes/ports)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles [2014] (Vudu)
Terminator: Genisys (Vudu)
Transformers: Age Of Extinction (iTunes 4K)
Transformers: The Last Knight (iTunes 4K or Vudu HD)
Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (iTunes 4K)
Tyler Perry's Madea's Witness Protection (iTunes)
Tyler Perry's Temptation: Confessions Of A Marriage Counselor (Vudu or Google Play)
Unbroken [2014] (MA or iTunes/ports)
Warm Bodies (Vudu)
XXX: Return Of Xander Cage (Vudu)
Zootopia (Google Play/ports)

🦝

💲1️⃣ SD

22 Jump Street (MA + Sony points)
Act Of Valor (iTunes)
After Earth [2013] (MA + Sony points)
Alpha [2018] (MA + Sony points)
Alvin & The Chipmunks: The Squeakquel (iTunes/ports)
Amazing Spider-Man, The [2012] (MA)
Amazing Spider-Man 2, The [2014] (MA + Sony points)
American Hustle [2013] (MA + Sony points)
Arthur Christmas [2011] (MA + Sony points)
A-Team, The [2010] [Theatrical] (iTunes/ports)
Blood Father [2016] (Vudu)
Bourne Identity, The (MA or iTunes/ports)
Call, The [2013] (MA + Sony points)
Call Me By Your Name [2017] (MA + Sony points)
Captain Phillips (MA + Sony points)
Chappie [2015] (MA + Sony points)
Charlie's Angels [2019] (MA + Sony points)
Crank 2: High Voltage (iTunes)
Date Night [2010] [Extended Edition] (iTunes/ports)
Day The Earth Stood Still, The [2008] (iTunes/ports)
Deliver Us From Evil [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Elysium [2013] (MA + Sony points)
Equalizer, The [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Expendables, The [2010] [Extended Director's Cut] (iTunes)
Goosebumps [2015] (MA + Sony points)
Hangover, The [Theatrical] [2009] (iTunes/ports)
Haywire [2012] (iTunes)
Here Comes The Boom [2012] (MA + Sony points)
Hotel Transylvania [2012] (MA + Sony points)
Hotel Transylvania 2 (MA + Sony points)
Hotel Transylvania 3 (MA + Sony points)
Hours [2013] (Vudu)
House At The End Of The Street, The [2012] (iTunes)
Ice Age: Dawn Of The Dinosaurs (iTunes/ports)
Immortals [2011] (iTunes)
Insidious: Chapter 2 (MA + Sony points)
Insidious: The Last Key (MA + Sony points)
Looper [2012] (MA + Sony points)
Mamma Mia! The Movie (iTunes/ports)
Men In Black III [2012] (MA + Sony points)
Monte Carlo [2011] (iTunes/ports)
Monuments Men, The [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Mortal Instruments: The City Of Bones (MA + Sony points)
Movie 43 (iTunes)
Nerve [2016] (Vudu)
Olympus Has Fallen (MA + Sony points)
Orange Is The New Black season 1 (Vudu)
Orange Is The New Black season 3 (Vudu)
Paranoia [2013] (iTunes)
Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief (iTunes/ports)
Perfect Guy, The [2015] (MA + Sony points)
Peter Rabbit [2018] (MA + Sony points)
Predators [2010] (iTunes/ports)
Raven, The [2012] (iTunes)
Rio [2011] (iTunes/ports)
Risen [2016] (MA + Sony points)
Rise Of The Planet Of The Apes (iTunes/ports)
Rite, The [2011] (iTunes/ports)
Robin Hood [2010] [Unrated] (iTunes/ports)
Safe Haven (iTunes)
Sausage Party [2016] (MA + Sony points)
Shark Night [2011] (iTunes)
Sparkle [2012] (MA)
Spider-Man: Into The Spiderverse (MA + Sony points)
Star, The [2017] (MA + Sony points)
Taken [2009] [Extended Cut] (iTunes/ports)
That Awkward Moment [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Think Like A Man Too [2014] (MA + Sony points)
Trust, The [2016] (Vudu)
Tyler Perry's Madea's Tough Love (Vudu)
Underworld: Awakening (MA + Sony points)
Vow, The [2012] (MA + Sony points)
Wanted [2008] (iTunes/ports)1
Warrior [2011] (iTunes)
Water For Elephants (iTunes/ports)
Wedding Ringer, The [2015] (MA + Sony points)
When The Bough Breaks [2016] (MA + Sony points)
White House Down [2013] (MA + Sony points)
X-Men: First Class (iTunes/ports)
X-Men Origins: Wolverine (iTunes/ports)

🦝

Super Cheap SD & HD Codes

All movies are 3 for $1 but must spend at least $1 on total order.
Alex Cross (iTunes SD only)
Cabin In The Woods, The (iTunes SD only)
Criminal [2016] (Vudu SD only)
Dirty Grandpa (Vudu SD only)
Expendables 2, The (Vudu SD only or iTunes SD only)
Expendables 3, The [Unrated] (iTunes HD only)
Fast Five [Extended] (iTunes/ports HD)
Furious 7 [Extended] (MA ports HD)
Hunger Games, The (Vudu SD or iTunes SD only)
Hunger Games: Catching Fire, The (Vudu SD only)
John Wick 3 (Google Play HD only)
Life Of Pi (iTunes/ports SD)
Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol (Vudu HD only)
Perks Of Being A Wallflower (iTunes SD only)
Skyfall (iTunes SD only)
Star Trek: Into Darkness (Vudu HD only)
Taken 2 (iTunes/ports SD)
Transformers: Age Of Extinction (Vudu HD only)
Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (Vudu SD only)
Warm Bodies (iTunes SD only)

Hello everyone, I chose to repost this after I blocked all the trouble makers who were sending my hate mail over my into, If anyone posts/message me hateful comments over this intro you will be blocked, reported and you messages will be added to bottom of this post so people can know your true self. Now that that is out of the way here in intro, now with most of the typos fixed lol but otherwise the same!

• [Picture/physical description]

I don't feel as Christian we should be focused outwardly and there is a lot of scriptures to back this up but it seems to be a requirement here, so I'm white, 6ft, dark blond, not fat, but not skinny.

• Area of study/work:

I was home schooled and completed school a 3 years early, I spent those 3 years learning all sorts of things most people would not know, I taught myself how to plumb, to basic electrical work, fix cars, computers, appliances, and so many other handy things. I ended up becoming a car wash tech working on most of the systems at a local car wash and helped renovate homes on the side, after that car wash closed down I volunteered at a local charity and was quickly hired on full time, I been there for nearly 10 years now and love the job, most of my co workers are disabled in some way so a lot of friends I have happen to be disabled ether mentally or physically, I wanted to point that out as I know not everyone likes to be around those with mental disabilities and much of my circle is made up of people with all sorts of disabilities.

• Hobbies/interests:

A lot of my hobbies revolve around me leaning new things or working with my hands. I love fixing things and tinkering, in the past I raced nitro powered RC cars, fixed cars, I often like to play around with vintage computers and electronics, cooking is anther past time of mine as well.

• Tell us a bit about your Christian journey:

I grew up in a Christian house hold but my family was more legalistic, most my family did not have a personal relationship with the Lord and sadly many of them has fallen form faith. I on the other hand was the black sheep of the family and was saved as a rather young age and I currently go to a non denominational church online with a overseas autistic friend of mine. TBH I'm not picky when it comes to denominations so long as its a good bible believing church I'm happy with it. I feel a lot of Christians should not be hung up on how we worship as we are commanded to love the Lord with all our heart and to love one anther. That being said I don't go to church in person anymore as many in my area are not preaching the Gospel and peach hate more then anything.

• What sort of person are you looking for?

First and foremost I'm looking for someone who is putting Christ first in their lives, I'm rather flexible passed that. I don't have a type when it comes to looks and feel that judging a date on the way they look is foolish. However there are a few things I wanted to bring up, I don't believe in divorce what so ever, to me its never a option nor will I do anything sexual outside of marriage, I also prefer to be around people who don't beat around the bush. I also never been able to date anther christian before, sadly in today day and age Christian man are not wanted in the dating market so my experience in dating and knowing what I want is next to zero so I'll be learning as I go so to say.

• Age range:

I'm not picky on age at all, older or younger is fine, to me age it just a number but given my personality I think younger would be far better. Someone 18-25 on a personality level would likely be more compatible with me however I tend to have interests that would label me a old soul and most of my closest friends are far older then me. I also grew up in a bit of a cultural bubble and form a pop cultural stand point you would think I'm from gen X. So I can see things working out just as well with someone older too.

• Would you be willing to do long distance/relocate?

Being a Christian man living in the USA I know that most women would not want anything to do with me and I'm fully open to dating outside the US so distance is not a problem, I'm not to keen on relocating but given the right person I would think about it. I'm a home owner and live in a very good, safe town and have a good job so I think it would be best if you moved to were I live.
EDIT:
I wanted to point out I come form a rather wealthy family and my family can be rather snobby and prime/proper about some things, wile I am nothing like them and live very humbly I wanted to point that out as it can be a shocker to find simple old me comes form such a family.

Hey reddit! I'm a 38 year old latin guy from Washington DC. Honesty is the best policy so I'll make it known now that I'm not looking for platonic friends, I'm looking for a romantic partner. Buckle up, because I'm about to unveil why I may or may not be the right partner for you in a classic listicle style that all you youngin's love.
About Me:
^{You'll never believe number 6!}

1. I'm a bit of a stoner. It's true, your boy loves himself some marijuana. (In fact, I did a 25mg edible earlier) I endeavor to never let it take over my life, but it aids a lot in #2 on this list. I'm also not a stranger to the very occasional mushroom trip.
2. I'm a true creative. Left to my own devices in an empty room, I would constantly create new things. Whether that be drawing, writings, photography, music or stoner ideas. It's my true nature to be a creative and to stifle that part of myself makes me pretty sad. Fortunately, I get to create on a daily basis. which brings me to..
3. I have the kindest heart. I see life through rose colored glasses, some may say. I just believe in the good in people. I think most people are good and those that are bad are redeemable. Whether someone is ultra religious, a different political affiliation, good, bad, ugly, whatever...I believe in getting to know them for myself and making my own decision of them. As a friend I always stick by my friends, no matter what. Friends in my life are friends for life, even if we lose touch. There is a downside to all this...it's that sometimes people take advantage of me. I don't care. When confronted with the choice to be loving or to be cruel or apathetic, I will always choose loving.
4. I make people laugh. Comedy and jokes have always been a part of me. Maybe it's the fact that I'm a middle child and craved attention or the fact that I grew up in a city where I had to be quick on my feet, but I love to make people laugh. This is best done in person but there can be humor over the internet too. :)
5. I don't take myself too seriously. I'm a talented person in my field and it's important for me to let go of my ego. There isn't a single person that I can't learn from and at my best I'm always open to listen to people's opinions of me or my creative work.
6. I see beauty in everyone, including you. If you hadn't guessed by now, I'm a photographer. I'm into portraits and I value my connection with people one-on-one and I think that's what makes me a talented portrait photographer. I often hear people talk about the things they hate about themselves but try to reflect to them their true beauty. The beauty that was always there and that they need to be reconnected to.
7. I'm culturally Latino. My parents are from El Salvador, but I was born and raised in DC. I have the experience of being born into a family of immigrants and understand the duality of living in two different worlds. While Spanish was my first language, it is not what I consider to be my native tongue. While I understand all Spanish, all my Spanish is food related.
8. I've done the self work. It's true. I'm not a man that punches walls, gets drunk and cries, will cheat on you, lie to you or a myriad of other things that toxic people do. I am not without faults, of course, but I have worked my demons out for the most part. I'm very self-aware and open to criticism and change.
9. I'm honest 99.5% of the time. Anyone professing to be honest 100% of the time is a liar. Ask me directly and I'll tell you my last big lie.
10. I know where I want to be in life. I'm close to getting there too. I've been at it for 13 years now and I feel that success is imminent. Will you be a part of it?

So what are you waiting for? Dust off that old keyboard, pound away at a few keys, and get ready to embark on an unforgettable adventure brought to you by (as they said in my day) the world wide web.
P.S - I'm 6'2. I should've started with that.

This is my first reddit post, and I'm just looking for any insight that someone who has gone through the application process might be able to offer me, either words of encouragement or a reality check. I've always been interested in going to medical school, but recently decided that I'm focusing my efforts on applying to UK schools exclusively. Based on my own lack of knowledge and some doubt that has been cast on me by a few people in the past (the haters), I feel like I'm crazy enough for thinking I am qualified to compete for a seat in grad-entry medicine as an international applicant, so I figured there must be someone with experience as an international applicant who would know more than me, and if i'm qualified given my experience. Every one of my friends here in the USA think I'm a great applicant, but I know that our perspective is far different from anyone who has been through the UK admissions process.
I have a bachelors degree in mechanical engineering through an honors program (3.9 GPA) from a top public school for engineering, and one of the 5 largest schools in the entire country. I also completed traditional 'pre-med' courses alongside the degree (chem, biochem, physiology, etc.). I'm still here doing a master's in biomedical engineering, where my focus is in medical devices and injury biomechanics. In undergrad, I held leadership positions in a few different university organizations (which im sure is irrelevant in applications), and completed a few internships and co-ops outside of school, one of which was with a medical device testing and validation company. I also completed a 2 year capstone project, where I worked with local trauma surgeons to develop a new device for a surgical procedure, where I gained vast experience in medical device regulation and shadowing experience from the surgeons and their residents. As a result of the project, my team obtained a provisional with my name on it (hoping to have a patent completed soon), and I've continued learning a lot about medical device regulation.
The first year of my masters was focused on leading a research project using postmortem human body donors to study automotive impacts for developing safety criteria, where I gained unique experience with human subject instrumentation and testing, as well as vast experience with human dissection and autopsy for post-test injury analysis, and subsequent data analysis and processing. This next year of my masters will be focused on working as a 'research fellow' outside of my classes with a local children's hospital under a pediatric surgeon, where I'll be shadowing various surgeons and OR staff in order to do the beginning stages of background research to create new ideas for pediatric-specific devices and procedures, where I'll mostly be shadowing in different children's hospitals and presenting new ideas/difficulties that surgeons face.
Outside of school, I've gained shadowing experience with surgeons, residents, PAs, PCAs, nurses, and paramedics as ive been trying to create a picture of the entire continuity of care of a patient between different staff, from the moment a patient calls 911, goes through the ER, all the way to discharge. I also have completed roughly 200 hours of volunteering (half of which are in the ICU of a local childrens hospital where I clean toys and hold/feed babies who do not have present guardians to hold them). I have yet to begin studying for the UCAT, but I have the (ambitious) idea that I would score between 2900-3000 based on my diagnostic tests- though I still have about 2 months to begin studying and reviewing. I'm visiting England to take a look at all of the schools I plan on applying to next month, and have connected with at least 2 students in current medicine programs to chat with about their experience while I visit, but I've been unable to get responses from any admissions staff regarding if I meet the standard qualifications for a grad-entry applicant.
I am wondering if anyone out there would have any idea whether this brief summary of the bulk of my relevant experience would make me stand out as an applicant among the extremely competitive international graduate-entry students. I have a really strong passion for research in medicine, and would describe my ideal role as a physician-scientist where I could do bench-to-bedside research, and I think that schools in the UK would offer the best education for me, especially considering that many schools offer study-abroad options, and would surround me with other students who are driven by the same values that I am. Huge thanks to anyone that took the time to read this😁

Session 0 "Intake": https://www.reddit.com/DeltaGreenRPG/comments/1d0l92x/impossible_landscapes_session_0/
Session 1 "The Apartment": https://www.reddit.com/DeltaGreenRPG/comments/1d2sjua/impossible_landscapes_session_1_the_apartment/
Operation ALICE, New York, 1995
The Roster (Player/Character)
Lea (she/her): Jules Gradkowska - Agent MIRANDA. Journalist - research and human intelligence.
Iain (he/him): Ralph Bevis - Agent MILHOUSE. Academic - history and occult specialist.
Quinn (he/him): Richard Delapore - Agent MAVERICK. FBI Special Agent - criminal and forensic expert and the official 'face' of the investigation.
Phil (he/him): Jean Duvall - Agent MAIN. US Navy Master Chief Petty Officer - operational security specialist.
Duncan (he/him): Jake Little - Agent MALATESTA. Civilian contractor - computer and electronic specialist with a side line in hacking.
Rob_sothoth (he/him) - Handler. The arbiter of the world: the good, the bad and that which cannot and should not be named.
Background: The Agents of M-Cell are tasked with investigating the apartment of Abigail Wright. Missing since June, Delta Green has reason to suspect para-natural involvement. Their orders are simple: catalogue the apartment and remove anything deemed suspect for destruction.
Despite heavy changes made, full spoiler warning for Impossible Landscapes.

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Session 2 "Futures Past" (June 7th, 2024)
New York: Wednesday, August 9th, 1995
05:00am - 2:30pm, EST
Following the first day of investigation, Agent MAIN is the first to wake. An early-riser after years in the military, he leaves a note for Marsha. The two will meet again, of course. Arriving at work, he gets chatting to some Navy mechanics about the little weird diagram on the napkin. About the best answer he gets (after a successful check), is that one of them remembers seeing something like a clockwork giraffe as an attraction in South America. Studying it on that basis, MAIN concludes it's an artist's attempt at design because he can't see a way for this to work or even what it might really be for. He also checks in with USN and asks a friend to track down some vintage US Arms gear (he noted the serial numbers on the radio and dud-grenade). Not being from the same branch of service (and a failed check), it will take somewhere between 24-48 hours. (I decided US Armed Forces would probably be better at digitizing records, he'll get something either way).
MAVERICK isn't far behind MAIN, starting his day as usual being one of the first into the FBI NYC Field Office. As far as the FBI is concerned, he's on the Wright case now it's in their jurisdiction. Unprepared to wait for the prints to be matched (failed check on Bureaucracy), he instead does it himself (successful Forensics check). Abigail was never arrested, but her father handed in a hairbrush she kept at his and his wife's home. The prints match. It took MAVERICK a little time (it was a close pass), because part of a second, unidentified print obscured one of Abigail's, He can discount himself and the team, and likely anyone in law enforcement as he assumed they would've gone gloved.
Next, he follows up on Art Life and makes a call. He gets on the phone with Cynthia LeChance and in the course of their conversation is able to intuit there's something she's unsure or hesitant about. Being the honest-to-goodness, earnest Agent Cooper type, MAVERICK is able to organise a lunch meeting with her as part of follow up. He doesn't have many questions, he assures Cynthia and it'll be on the FBI's dime. She agrees to meet at 12pm.
(It's worth mentioning I ruled there was no reason MARCUS (Case Officer, M-Cell) or the Agents themselves wouldn't have or be able to obtain pagers they could use to stay in contact. Definitely an incidental expense as far as I am concerned.)
MILHOUSE, after his morning run to campus, follows up on his research from the previous day. He identifies the Ars Goetia and learns there's an 18th century copy in the special collections. Luckily for him, he's able to get about an hour with the book. The book contains the names of some 72 demons, their associated heraldry and symbols which they must "pay allegiance to." The book also contains the supposed means of summoning said entities, but MILHOUSE's time is over before he can get much further into it.
He's the first to arrive at the apartment, late morning/early afternoon (roughly around MAVERICK's planned lunch interview). At the coffeeshop, he's treated to a free beverage by Marsha, who thanks him for bringing his friend in the other day. Sadly, by the time MAIN arrives, her shift is over.
MIRANDA lies awake, watching the minutes tick by until about five minutes before she'd usually be walking into the Village Voice's office before making a call. She's really sorry, but she'll have to take a personal day, but does her best to reassure her editor she's still on for the grill party on Saturday. Of more immediate concern is the missing demonic symbol she is unable to locate. The polaroid she snapped is still in her possession, but she can find no trace of the symbol drawn on its piece of brown wrapping paper anywhere in her apartment. Nor can she find any evidence her home was broken into (she has the right skills to determine that for...reasons).
She makes a quick call to her criminal contact, Hugo. It's been less than 24 hours, but she wants to just follow up to perhaps create a sense of urgency. Hugo says he might have a couple of people on the hook, but it would help if he had more to work with than just "weird and esoteric." MIRANDA will be in touch. Before heading to Kips Bay, she decides to follow up on trying to locate the cab and its driver she photographed the other day; the driver looking down the barrel of the camera at her.
It takes her most of the morning, but MIRANDA locates the garage and office. Mostly making calls asking about a cab outside Abigail's address the previous day. She knows the time, more or less. She finds a schlubby office manager who stonewalls her until money changes hands. MIRANDA gets a name and the cabbie's usual pick up and route. Guy likes to work around the Port Authority Terminal most days, she can probably find him there. She doesn't want to go alone and makes her way to the Macallistar where she expects to find the others.
A night owl and late to wake by nature, MALATESTA hits snooze on his alarm maybe only twice today. Packing up the weird crystal in a ziplock bag stowed in his backpack, he takes himself to the Mercury Gallery. He's got an angle he wants to try and it works, if not quite in the way he perhaps expected.
The gallery owner, Santiago, isn't sure what to make of the skater-grunge kid who rolls into his gallery, but he's not exactly out of place and to be truthful, his story is almost too outlandish not to be true. Through a combination of good roleplay and an opposed check, MALATESTA explains a "dude he's working for" heard about Abigail's exhibition and wanted to know if there were any paintings of hers left unsold.
As it turns out, there are. Santiago explains they're not the cream of the crop: "Most of the others were more abstract and, I would say, exemplary. She did well, especially for an artist in New York. The one or two I have left are a bit more...prosaic."
At about this time, MAVERICK makes his meeting with Cynthia. He's not hard to miss; there is no reality in which he was not a Federal Agent and Cynthia easily marks him across the street. She takes him to a small Italian bistro where she usually has lunch and begins talking. This is what MAVERICK is good at; getting people to talk. Everyone wants to, after all; it's about letting them and knowing where to push and where not.
Cynthia explains how weird the Macallistar has been for her to manage. The building has never been filled to capacity as far she can recall and those units which were occupied never remained so for very long.
MAVERICK: "Did you know Abigail?"
Cynthia: "Not really. I met her once or twice. Went with her and her dad to view the apartment." She smiles. "He was worried about her having a ground floor unit in the city, but it was the one she wanted. Never any complaints from her or from other tenants about her. Then...the rent stopped."
MAVERICK: "Yeah, we saw that."
Cynthia: "No. You don't understand. The rent stopped. No one in the building has been paying rent since March this year."
MAVERICK: "What does that mean?"
Cynthia is nervous. MAVERICK picks up she's worried she might be in trouble and he reassures her she isn't. Far from it, in fact.
Across town, MALATESTA is shown one of Abigail's unsold paintings. Santiago unveils it; a landscape, the frame longer than it is tall. A park, with a city-skyline in the background. In the centre, a statue. There are people. Some gathered in a crowd, others walking in various directions. MALATESTA feels uneasy. Then he sees them: five figures gathered in the shadows of the statue around a sixth, seated on a bench. Merely brushstrokes, details and faces indistinct. One may be a woman. Another appears to be holding a skateboard.
Santiago, distant as MALATESTA gave the painting his full attention, becomes clear again.
"See what I mean? Like something you'd see in a doctor's office."
"Yeah." MALATESTA passes a SAN check, but still takes one.
He was there just yesterday.
This was exhibited in November of last year (1994).
He tries and fails to argue Santiago down on the price and is very unaware that the gallery owner is hitting on him. Wrapping the painting, MALATESTA asks if Santiago can check on where some of the other paintings might have ended up or ask around about Abigail in general. Since it means they will meet again, Santiago is all too happy to oblige and hands MALATESTA a business card, writing his own number on the back.
MALATESTA: "Cool, man. I'll be in touch with the deets."
Santiago: "Sure...the deets." (I think it pained him to say that word)
Before leaving, he lets go something Abigail mentioned during the exhibition. While unable to recall the name, he thinks she said she got her inspiration from a book of some sort. He thinks the name might have been something French.
Across their lunch table, Cynthia explains she thinks Art Life upper management are content to wait for eviction notices to be served to the remaining tenants.
Cynthia: "I think even if everyone paid what they owe and next month's, management wouldn't change their mind."
MAVERICK: "Why?"
Cynthia: "I think they want to renovate the building. Getting everyone out lets them do that. Spruce it up, hike the rent...I lie awake at night wondering if that's legal. I've never evicted a whole building."
MAVERICK: "One of my colleagues bumped into one of Abigail's neighbours. Mr. Post, Lewis Post I think. Same story with him?"
Cynthia: "Yeah, same as the rest. More or less."
MAVERICK: "More or less?"
Cynthia: "He called me the end of March this year, said he'd be late on the rent, but not to worry and then he started asking me about the building."
MAVERICK: "And you did?"
Cynthia: "Yeah, but I wish I hadn't."
She names a few books she picked up, as Lewis wanted more than just what Art Life had on the Macallistar. MAVERICK wonders why, but she explains Lewis was nice and she was curious herself.
"It's a weird building. Always made me feel...off, being there. I can't remember the last time I went in person."
MAVERICK: "What did you learn? I have the architect's name. Daribondi."
Cynthia: "Asa. Asa Daribondi. The Macallistar was built in 1921. He designed it. He...there was a fire at his office on Mott Street in 1950 and he disappeared. He...he was a murderer, Agent Delapore. They found a child's body on the premises. After that, I stopped looking into it."
There's a long silence. The MAVERICK asks her for keys to the unoccupied apartments. He tells her a story about how when he started out in the Bureau, he was involved in a missing person's case. A little girl and in the end, they found her hiding in her treehouse.
Cynthia: "You think Abigail's still in the building? In one of the empty units?"
MAVERICK: "I don't know, but I can't discount it. I don't think she was in a normative state of mind before she disappeared."
Cynthia considers things. The plates are cleared and the coffee served.
Cynthia reaches into her handbag and removes something. "If management don't care about the building, I don't see why I should either." She hands him a master key. "Don't lose this and borrow it for...give it back to me when you're done."
True to his word, MAVERICK pays the bill.
"I hope you find her, her find something to maybe help. She was nice."
MAVERICK and Cynthia say their goodbyes and he heads to Kips Bay.
In the interim, MIRANDA has joined MILHOUSE and MAIN in the coffeeshop, with MALATESTA arriving with weird painting in tow not long before MAVERICK's arrival.
Unable to contain his excitement, MALATESTA nearly unveils the painting right then and there.
MALATESTA: "You won't believe-"
MIRANDA: "Let's not talk about this here."
MALATESTA: "No, I know, but-"
Coffeeshop patrons are giving the table weird looks.
MIRANDA: "Let's not talk about this here."
MALATESTA: "I was jus-"
MIRANDA: "Let's not talk about this here."
Some of the people are frowning, scowling almost.
MILHOUSE (to the other patrons): "Sorry. Sorry."
MAVERICK arrives not long after and the team reconvenes in the apartment to share what they've learned and determine any plans.
Unable to contain himself, MALATESTA reveals the painting. Everyone except MAIN passes the SAN check for the realisation of what it depicts. MAIN takes 4 SAN loss and does not project. Closing in on his breaking point, MAIN is confused and unable to fully process what's going on and throws himself into another search of the apartment.
MIRANDA is concerned about further exposure to the para-natural and wonders if there is anything they can do to take care. All they can do is be cautious.
MAVERICK wants to make a sweep of the empty apartments in the building. MILHOUSE agrees to partner up with him on that front.
MALATESTA and MIRANDA remain with MAIN in Abigail's apartment to conduct a further search. The three who remain received a +20% bonus to their search rolls and all pass as MAVERICK & MILHOUSE leave to check the building (They can make rolls in the apartment on their return).
They exit the apartment at 2:30pm.
Within, MALATESTA, MAIN & MAVERICK find the following:
A rent receipt with Abigail's name, undated and signature unreadable.
A page of typed script which appears to be a play Abigail was writing. Several names are mentioned: Michelle, Mark & Thomas. Michelle is the first name of one of Abigail's neighbours, right?
A plane ticket in the name of Michael Witwer from Las Vegas to Boston, dated June 6th, 2015.

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Dorchester House, 2015
Dr. Dallon: "Must've been a fake? What with the date and all."
MAVERICK: "Must have been."

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Post-Mortem
Five players going in different directions was a little tough to juggle, but they were happy with the pace of play and I made sure everyone had something to do.
I knew we weren't going to get through an entire in-game day about an hour in and I should've taken a bit more time to line up what everyone wanted to do at the end of the previous session, but everyone still had fun. Lea put it well: it feels like there's a dam with information gathering against it and it's going to burst.
With four out of the five players having children, I took a short aside during MAVERICK's rp with Cynthia to do a table check. I know the players and they know me and I handled it in the right way as far as they were concerned.
Two sessions in and MAIN is the first character to close on his BP, being 3 or 4 (one bad roll) away from his first disorder. I appreciate this and his reasons for not projecting make sense, in-character. We'll see how that pans out.
Our next session is TBD due to life stuff and until then, be seeing you.

I matched with someone on Bumble and we have been talking for a few days. Our conversations are a lot of fun and he seems like a normal, decent guy. He's cute from the pictures and also sent me a few selfies and I like how he looks. We agreed to meet next Friday. But the problem is that I'm so negative about dating that I feel this will be another waste of time. I've been on Bumble on and off for years now, went on many dates and dated someone for a few months (it ended up with him practically ghosting me after sex). I have of course dated in other contexts too and not just using datingappsb and in general my experiences have not been the best. If this also goes bad, I think I'll stop trying altogether.
I just feel so lonely sometimes and I would like to have someone to spend my Sundays with (I have many friends and hobbies and a full life but it's not the same as having a partner). I want intimacy and company. At the moment I'm here on my bed crying and feeling really sorry for myself, thinking I'm ugly and that this guy will definitely not like me or I won't like him and that I will leave feeling really disappointed. I'm seriously considering bailing on him.

35Y/O FTM here. Delivery at 40+3, vaginal birth after induction due to mild pre-eclampsia. Everything progressed smoothly, but, let’s be honest, “smooth” doesn’t quite capture the full picture, right?
Induction started at 8 am with the Foley bulb. Fun fact: it feels exactly like someone shoved a slightly deflated basketball up there. Not pleasant, but thankfully temporary (out by noon!).
Contractions started around 2 pm, and, let me tell you, they weren’t messing around. I opted for an epidural around 5 pm — best decision ever. Didn’t take away all the feeling, but it turned the dial down from “screaming into the void” to something more manageable.
I pushed for a solid two hours. It wasn’t all glamorous. There were moments of pure exhaustion, questioning my sanity, and, yes, involuntary grunting that morphed into the occasional (mortifying) yell. But, honestly, every push felt like I was getting closer to meeting my little guy, and that kept me going.
He finally arrived at 8:15 pm. 8 lbs 10 oz of pure perfection (well, as perfect as a freshly evicted tenant can be). The placenta delivery was . . . interesting. More of a “whoosh” than anything dramatic, followed by a wave of relief.
The aftermath was shaky, sweaty, and utterly euphoric. Skin-to-skin with this little miracle, the exhaustion melted away. The next few hours were a blur — nurses checking vitals, stitching a small tear (fun!), and the initial wobbly attempts at breastfeeding.
Sending love and strength to all the mamas out there!

Previous part: 8.99.
​
One thing that I'm not getting here is why Vanessa is even a part of Vanny or Glitchtrap's situation since Double-V is true. I originally thought up Double-V, I was originally thinking that Vanessa and Vanny were sharing the role of "Vanny".
It's just one of them was more willing than the other to be a part of Glitcthtrap's machinations than the other. I didn't put too much thought into it, but it was something I wanted to look for until that Security Team revelation came about.
But now I'm left with this puzzle piece called Vanessa that I'm not quite sure what to do with now that I know that Vanny is an entirely separate person from her.
She has to be involved with Vanny and Gltichtrap somehow. Maybe the therapy tapes will help.

• CD 1-Therapist: — but a routine check of your online history has revealed that you spend quite a bit of time with someone in an encrypted conversation. We have transcripts, and I’ve read them, but it’s not clear what you’re talking about in these conversations. I can’t make sense of it. You must be getting something from these that I’m not getting. Right? Who are you talking to in these?

These are all things that would've pointed toward Glitchtrap if I didn't know better. So it's someone else doing this? Why and why her?

• CD 5-Therapist: — Apparently, the IT department has put together a pretty lengthy report chronicling non-job-related communications that have been coming to your computer. — what bothers me about what I read is that the messages you're getting seem very manipulative in nature. —You know who I'm talking about. What you might not know is that this person who's been sending you messages has been hacking into your personal files too.
• CD 5-Vanessa: Lots of people know more than I do. Sometimes I need to listen.

So Vanessa knows who's doing this to her. But she's been refusing to listen to them before and is now being worn down by the spamming messages sent to her. But the fact that she doesn't react to the news that they are digging into her personal life is very concerning!
Also, after going through Vanny's secret dialogue in Help Wanted, Vanessa's overall demeanor in both Security Breach and the Retro Cds clashes hard with Vanny's in both games. Where Vanny sounds and reads eager and nervous, Vanessa is defiant and reluctant with depressed undertones.
Is Vanessa really infected with Glitchtrap?
Yet now that I'm thinking about it, Glitchtrap has no need to do this as him sitting through Vanessa's therapy session with her would give him this info if she was infected. Who's ever doing this doesn't much about her, but would very much like to. Is it Vanny or Gregory...
Wait, hold on. Vanessa's first therapist mentioned that messages were encrypted and couldn't make out what the conversation was about. But the second therapist can understand these messages to know that they're manipulative in nature. Are these two different messengers?!
" I’ve read them, but it’s not clear what you’re talking about in these conversations**.** I can’t make sense of it. You must be getting something from these that I’m not getting." - The first Therapist
"but what bothers me about what I read is that the messages you're getting seem very manipulative in nature." - The second Therapist
What changed? Hmm... What exactly is an encrypted conversation? Maybe explaining that will help.
Encrypted text messaging is a method of secure communication that converts your messages into code. This means that only the recipient with the correct decryption key can read it. - Google
That sounds like what the first Therapist is referring to, but she mentions that they got the transcripts for it. Does that mean that got the code or the decryption key to read it? No, she says transcripts, which means the code itself.
But whatever the first Therapist saw in that transcript was legible enough to read and comprehend. This means the conversation wasn't in computer coding that would require someone in the tech field to decipher it, but just ordinary talk that's hard to understand what it's about.
Okay, that clears things up, they're still the same messenger.

• CD 11-Therapist: So, on your breaks, it looks like you were shopping for a costume. you purchased some fake fur material.
• CD 11- Vanessa: I can't talk about this. He said he would always be watching. He could be here or there or anywhere in between.
• CD 11-Therapist: No, that's not what I mean. You can't just ignore an issue. You have to face your memory of the experiences and process them so you can let it go. So you don't get triggered anymore. you can use this sort of self-dialogue to release these things
• CD 11-Vanessa: I don't like doing that.

This one conversation right here throws everything about Double-V out of whack. Why is Vanessa buying fake fur material? And for the very first time, we know the gender of who's messaging her along that he said that he would always be watching her.
Again the "he" here, and the "he will always be watching" part allude to Glitchtrap at first glance. And again, it can't be him because he should be within Vanessa since they merged in Help Wanted! Even if you dismissed the ending I proposed for Vanny and went with the ending where she gets locked up by Glitchtrap, it still wouldn't be him messaging her about watching here because he would be in her body!
And like I already said before, Vanessa has shown no memory problems or bodily control problems, which would've suggested Glitchtrap's control. No, this means that Gregory is doing all of this.
But why is he going after Vanessa? Geez, It's been a while since I even thought about his past before Security Breach. I forgot how much of a black hole of questions he is, regarding the lore. I'll give my updated thoughts about him after the Double-V revelation later.
For now, after going through all of Gregory's dialogue in Security Breach. It looks like he's not quite aware of the ongoings within the Pizzaplex and is shocked by the level of security can employ later in the night. There may actually be a hint of his hacker background in his dialogue if you squint. And Gregory has absolutely no idea what the rabbit laddy's name is until he gets to Fazerblast.
As for Gregory's involvement with Vanessa... Huh, that's weird. Gregory doesn't say Vanessa's name even once in Security Breach. Matter of fact, after the beginning sequence where Vanessa confronts Freddy about him, Gregory just stops talking about or even mentioning her for the rest of the game. This includes the confrontation that leads to her locking him up in Lost and Found and after it...
No matter how you slice it, Gregory's silence about her is super loud with alarm bells. Sure, he dismisses her as working with Vanny in the beginning, but it shouldn't mean that she should be an afterthought to him! Like, Gregory only talks about or mentions "the rabbit lady" after the beginning of the game.
In fact, if we were to rank every important character that Gregory talks about or mentions in his dialogue for Security Breach from most to least, it would look like this.

1. Freddy - 33 times
2. Vanny - 6 times
3. Chica - 6 times
4. Roxy - 4 times
5. Monty - 3 times
6. Moon - 3 times
7. Vanessa - 3 times
8. Burntrap - 1 time

That's absurd! Especially since she's the only other human worker in the Pizzaplex, besides Vanny, who encounters and confronts him. Like, he doesn't even try to communicate with her at all during the entire game!
Even when discovering Vanny's hideout in Fazerblast and Freddy suggests that Vanny is Vanessa due to deduceing Vanny's name being a combination of Vanessa + Bunny, Gregory remains silent about it! No, "Oh maybe you're right." or "That sounds too simple to be right", but instead there's no response to what might be the identity of your pursuer!
It's like he doesn't want to talk about her...
He knows her, he has to know Vanessa! Yet, he said, "I don't know who she is, but she's trying to get me!" to Freddy. Is he lying? No, he just knows about her.

• CD 14-Therapist: —They report that they've caught you on camera, or at least it appears to be you. — Well the techs are convinced that you've hacked into their system many times. — the electronics you like? I saw in your file that you have developed software programs that talk to you and repeat phrases, right? The program asks you questions and prompts you for responses. It's kind of like your own self therapy, isn't it? Another way of talking to yourself to work things out, right? When I saw some of your recent encrypted conversation logs, that's what I thought I was looking at. It felt like I was watching someone go back and forth in their own head, but the text found something that's different than that. When I read what they found, at first I thought I was looking at more examples of you just talking with yourself. Then I realized it was different. When I study this, it sounds like there is someone else responding to you. Who is it?

This is either hinting towards Gregory talking directly to Vanessa or Glitchtrap. But something that confuses me is why the therapist has or even be able to see Gregory's encrypted conversation logs?
I'll admit that I'm ignorant about therapy, but should your therapist have access to stuff you created outside of therapy? Unless Gregory created the program on a computer in therapy. It could explain how he's gotten access to Vanessa's files. But I'll drop that talk for now.
Something that's being made clear to me now is that Vanessa is not as connected to the villains as Gregory is, as she's more surprised by the changing of therapist than he is. In fact, Gregory knows why the therapists are disappearing, knows exactly when the therapists do something that would cause them to disappear, and doesn't seem upset when they show up mangled and dead.
But more than anything, Gregory knew Vanny long before Security Breach started. There's no reason why Gregory would know Vanny has enough control over the Pizzaplex to cut off Freddy from the network, in just one encounter. If anything, he should have assumed she was some weirdo stranger in the Pizzaplex that the security and the police needed to take care of.
But he already knew that Vanny had power in the Pizzaplex, maybe not the full scope, but enough to know that if she and he ever came into conflict with one another that ended with her wanting to hurt him then he needed to get out of the Pizzaplex.
Funnily enough, this actually lines up with the first-ever trailer for Security Breach, where Vanny says: "Gregory, I may have lost my temper earlier. But it was just a glitch!" Which implies they talking neutrally before whatever made Vanny lose her temper." Again, I'm not using this as evidence as it's been cut, instead, I'm suggesting that the idea might have merit.

• CD-Therapist: — I have this still shot the techs pulled from the security footage that recorded you in the pizzaplex. That's you, isn't it? I know this image is distorted but I think it looks like you. And you're not alone here. You're talking to someone, or something. it's hard to tell. What are those things? They almost look like rabbit ears. What? You find that amusing? Well I guess it is.

I had always flipped-flopped between the mysterious person being either Glamrock Bonnie or Vanny. Both are connected to Glitchtrap, so either would fit here as Glitchtrap wouldn't be captured by a camera. But with the new evidence I've discovered, Vanny fits as Gregory's mysterious rabbit correspondent in the Pizzaplex.
But what about Vanessa? Is Gregory hacking into her files or is it Vanny and Glitchtrap? Or perhaps Gregory is hacking into her files on behalf of Glitchtrap and Vanny. Either way, Vanessa is getting dragged into Gregory and the Villian's group chat.
Speaking of the therapy, if we take into account the Retro-CD's numbering system the first two numbers are the patient ID number, and the last two numbers are the number of times both Gregory and Vanessa have been to therapy, then we can uncover some invaluable information.
Gregory has been in therapy longer than Vanessa and he was also in therapy before her too. But combining this CD's numbering system with a theory from the Talesbook story, GGY, that Gregory only goes to therapy on Sunday. Then Gregory has been going to therapy for a year and a half.
And if Vanessa is following the weekly therapy session pattern, then she's only been going to it for a little more than half a year. This means she started her therapy just about after Gregory hit his half-year mark for therapy. In addition to all that, Vanessa stopped going to therapy once she was transferred to a new location and never met the fourth and final therapist of the CDs.
Just something you all should keep in mind.
But Gregory definitely knows about her at the very least. That knowledge, I guess, is the reason why he's so shocked to see her face under Vanny's mask in the "To The Rooftop" ending. He knows that Vanessa and Vanny are two different people, but doesn't know that they look alike because he never encountered Vanny before Security Breach without her mask or costume.
On the subject of costumes, I still got no answer for Vanessa's purchase of fake animal fur or what's even happening with her now.
To be honest, this would be so simple and easy if Vanessa was just Vanny. But like as I have shown many times before in both this series and the previous one, simple and easy answers are not always the correct ones.
So, instead of looking for signs of the villain's goal with Vanessa in the lore. Let's look at the similarities and differences between the double Vs.
Vanessa's characteristics are.

• Depressed
• Has anxiety issues
• Tired (It's something that has been mentioned by the first and third therapists in CD-1 and CD-10. But seems to have more to do with the messages she's getting than how she usually is.)
• Likes the blue sky
• Likes to sit outside and read
• Watchful about her calorie intake
• Likes flowers or at least the sweet smell of them
• Doesn't like dark basements
• Oh, and hates kids

Vanny's characteristics are.

• Loves Pizza, especially pepperoni (Huh, no wonder she likes Chica)
• Absolutely, does not care about her calorie intake or a healthy diet (Seriously, Girl has gone full gamer mode with the amount of Fizzy Faz, straw drinks, and pizza boxes in areas with her presence in them)
• Hobbies in painting or graffiti
• Likes or used to like Glitchtrap or maybe William Afton (I talk about this in the secret ending)
• Loves Fazbear Entertainment (Vanny uses red spray paint in Ruin and has drawn two hearts on the FAZ ENT. Logo in the main Lobby)
• Likes Toy Chica
• Likes the Daycare Attendant (She seems to be fond of Moon more)
• Likes to read, or at least, read about the World History of Fazbear Entertainment
• Likes Flowers, a specific species of them(that I can't determine right now)
• Likes summer
• Is a mechanic or roboticist or both (She making something in Ruin Fazerblast and has turned Ruin Monty into her lapdog among other things)
• Super lazy (This one may or may not be true, but unless there's a good reason why she refuses to clean up her room in Fazer Blast, this is staying right here as far as I'm concerned)

Wow, I did not realize we already knew this much about Vanny just from the environment storytelling of the games until I listed them!
Anyway, as you can see, there are some very similar likes between the two and very stark differences in traits as well. I'm not about to list them to save word space, but instead, I want to answer a question. Could Vanessa still be Vanny despite their differences? This isn't so much for me, but for the people who believe Vanny = Vanessa despite my Double-V evidence.
At first, I thought there might've been a chance for that as they both like flowers, to read, and enjoy the outside, or at least the summer in Vanny's case. But now, after listing everything out they're just too different to say they're the same.
Even if we say that Vanny's love of pizza, general bad diet, and trashy room is the result of Vanessa coping with her depression and her situation with Glitchtrap and that her graffiti is the by-product of therapy, along with her interest in growing flowers. That doesn't negate the fact that in Ruin when given the chance to express her anxiety, Vanny doesn't take it.
If you don't know, on the wall where Vanny drew her face next to a slice of pizza in the main lobby near the Superstar Daycare entrance, there is a painted graph. The artist who made the graph also wrote on the right side of it; "TAG YOURSELF".
On all four sides of the graph, the artist made the furthest sides of them represent something. The top Y-axis is Wizard, the bottom Y-axis is Cedar the left X-axis is Filled with a word that ends in a y, and the right X-axis is Filled with anxiety.
What this graph is showing, or what the artist trying to convey with it, is that each of the four points represents not quite the opposite thing but the furthest thing from each other. Of which, Vanny decided to tag herself on the furthest left X-axis, not the right.
This tells us that Vanny feels the furthest thing from anxiety. Something Vanessa, no matter if she's under Glitchtrap's control or not, would be constantly feeling as she suffers from it.
As for what she's feeling, I don't know, the word on the left graph is unreadable and covered by Vanny's face to make it almost impossible to decipher. But what I do know without a doubt, is that Vanny and Vanessa are indeed, two different people with some common likes and polar opposite traits.
So after everything I've talked about in the last three? four? However many parts I've been going over Double-V, what is the best possible answer for the "To The Rooftop" ending stinger. Why do Vanny and Vanessa look alike?
I tried, I really did. I looked for as much possible evidence for anything that doesn't just make me give up and say "She's a Fazgoo clone!" or "She's a robot!"
If Vanny was a stranger who mimicked Vanessa's face, then that's cool and horrifying, but only where it concerns Vanessa herself. (The horrifying part, not the cool part.) It doesn't give us reasons why she would do it in the first place or a way to connect it to the greater lore and Glitchtrap, besides she's a human Mimic. Basically, it lacks motivation from everyone in the Villian party.
So it leaves me with no other conclusion except for one.
Back when the marketing for Security Breach was building up to its release. Steel Wool released four old Freddy cartoon episodes on their YouTube channel. Each episode hides a teaser image for the lore, including a character from the games with words, along with a character stinger at the end.
The last carton, which is the most distorted one, just so happened to include Vanessa as the hidden teaser, and Vanny as the character stinger at the end. And before you all jump the gun, previous episodes have already established that the hidden character teasers have no correlation to the ending Character stinger.
Now, the words in the Vanessa teaser image are quite interesting. It includes "Test and Rat" in the upper right corner, "Pool" in the bottom left corner, and "Bleak Reactant".
Test and Rat could be Test rat or Laboratory rat (Lab rat) as in the species of rat that are bred and kept for scientific research. Lab rat here can also be referring to Vanessa being a lab rat for the villain's experiment for something.
Using that explanation, "Pool" would then mean group or pool of people, which means number of people available for an organization or group to use. So Pool would mean that Vanessa was chosen out of all the Fazbear employees or people in general to be used for the experiment.
This leaves us with Bleak Reactant, which the definition of reactant is a substance that takes part in and experiences change during a reaction, while the definition of bleak could mean lacking vegetation (an area of land), dreary (a room), miserable(the weather), or unfavorable (outcome.)
All of this together means that Vanessa was chosen by the villains out of a group of people to be used for an experiment. An experiment of a change in Vanessa that predicted an unfavorable outcome for the villains.
Vanessa was going to be the next Vanny or maybe something else.
That gives a reason why the villains were so interested in her, why she would be shopping for a costume, why she would be at the Pizzaplex, and why she would be still connected to the villains when someone else is Vanny.
But the reason she was chosen in the first place, why her out of a group of people that might've included Gregory in it too, is because the one who chose her was her own twin sister.
If anyone remembers my only Ruin theory then you would remember my mentioning of Glitchtrap's and Vanny's conversation from Scott's website from a Security Breach poster.
Glitchtrap: "Stay the course."
Vanny: "I will."
Glitchtrap: "Focus on my voice."
Vanny: "I will."
Glitchtrap: "Don't let anyone lead you astray."
Vanny: “I won't.”
Glitchtrap: "Have you selected one?"
Vanny: "I have."
In my theory, I proposed that Gregory was the one that Vanny mentioned selecting here. But now, with all the revelations and new information gained, I believe Vanessa works better here. Vanny would've chosen someone for an experiment that she personally knew of or gotten to know, and who better than her own sibling that she grew up with.
Remember, Vanny is just starting out in her following of Glitchtrap. So would be new to the whole evil thing. And most of the time, the people close to you are the ones that would most likely commit a crime against you.
As for the twin sister thing, it actually didn't come from the "To The Rooftop" ending, but a discussion from the GTlive stream where Mat hosted a little get-together with some of the FNAF YouTuber theorists after Security Breach. There, John Fuhnaff suggested the idea for it from the VR Sisters boss from the Security Breach game Scott made when Security Breach got delayed again.
It's something that I saw some merit in after I discovered the Vanny ≠ Vanessa and after disproving in my head that Vanny wasn't Tape Girl either. The best part of the twin sister thing is that there's no need to throw out all that we know from Vanessa's therapy sessions as they both share the divorced parent's backstory.
As for which is the order twin between the two, I believe Vanessa is the oldest since it makes sense that her father would use the oldest to testify against their mother as she would better understand his instructions. Plus it provides a potential grudge from Vanny to Vanessa for what happened to their mother and a misguided parental affection for Glitchtrap. Unless Vanny's just a fangirl of William Afton, which could be the case.
Also, this means that the reason Vanessa looks the way she does in "To The Rooftop" end credits is because she looking at her dead sister. Oof, I realized that this also means she would've been the one who finds what's left of her in the "Disassemble Vanny" ending too. No wonder Faz Ent. is temporarily closed if they find that one employee is disassembled and the other one is having a mental breakdown from it in the morning.
But what about the "Redemption" ending? We know that by beating PQ3 both Glitchtrap and Vanny are defeated in it. What happens to her then? Where did she go? Hmm... I'm not sure.
What happens when someone is unmerged after being merged for a long time? Unlike Vanessa, we know that Vanny lives in the Pizzaplex. Even by Ruin and Help Wanted 2, she's still living in the building despite its condition so she probably needs time to think and process what happened to her and what's she done. Oh, and therapy. And a house.
But I think that just about wraps everything up for— Wait, HW2's Candy Cadet story! I forgot all about it! I know some people mentioned that the second story had to do with Vanessa, Gregory, and Gltichtrap. Let me skim through that real quick for clues.
Oh. Oh, that's really interesting... But it along with the Jeremy and the Memory dolls can wait until after next time. Sorry for the little to no pictures, I needed space to fit everything in one post and wanted to get everything about Double-V out of the way before I go on hiatus.
Don't worry it has nothing to do with burnout. It won't be too long either, though knowing my track record when saying that, you probably don't believe me.
Truth is, I've been severely neglecting my YouTube channel, and should really start catching up the YouTube version of my series with the online version. Plus, I've got more "Prove it!" to work on.
But most important of all, my birthday is coming up, and I don't want to work, think, or have anything to do with my FNAF stuff on that day. So! Feel free to read and become full with these last Parts until I come back with more.

I(22,male) and my girlfriend(22), let our names be A and B. We(A and B) have been together for 4 years and have been living together for 2 years,we have a friend group of 4 people(including us) let the other 2 be X(22,M) and Y(21,F). So, starting from 2022, i had just joined a gym, where me and X became close friends, basically gymbros, this was in February 2022 before that I and B were in a long distance relationship and as the lockdown had just uplifted B also arrived to my city for colle in 2022 feb. So my equation with X had always been amazing (Y isnt in the picture righ now no one knows she exists) so the gym i and X had met in we stay there for 8 months approximately and in September-october X finds a great gym so we decide to change our gyms. (During this my girlfriend also moves in with me) in the new gym X meets a new friend group where he meets Y. Y is a girl who has been gymming since a year when he met her and X is a gym rat so they basically hit it off and X basically starts to ignore me for the new friend group but i never really cared that much because i had understand he wanted to hit things off. Not going into much detail but till January end of 2023 me and X have very rare conversations but we are still friends tho no hard feelings then around valentines things mess up and Y and X stop talking and Y comes in a relationship with a guy (Z) it was basically a very forced relationship but after that X comes back to me starts spending time with me but I never said anything for that matter as I wanted to support him. So then X also becomes friends with B my girlfriend and now its only the 3 of us . I do talk Y seperately because i was friends with Y and rest of the group so it wasnt fair to just not talk and it was just till greeting each other when meeting in gym So even though X kept saying that he doesn’t care about Y but he very much did( also Y after 6 months of being in a relationship breaks up with Z) so me and my girlfriend do our best and we root for them and they are now in a relationship from the (sept2023) Things start to take a huge turn from here as now i and my girlfriend are now close with X and Y we are now a friend group. During the start we give them all the time they need to build their relationship But one day we saw X and Y are watching a movie with some other friends whom we also knew and they didn’t even ask us naturally i and B get sad and indirectly target them through stories ( yes that was very immature of us instead of just talking with them) but their reason was that they didn’t ask us about movie because we just said that we are financially tight but we never dined for a movie infact B was very excited for that movie but still after that argument we get to hear “it was immature of you to put up an instagram story” to which we agreed but we weren’t heard and somehow it was our fault in the end. So after that in the end of 2023 i and B change gym and X and Y do too so naturally we start drifting apart in this timeline there has been many instances where i and B have invited them to our house asked them to hangout but they were never free for us and somehow always managed to hangout with others just to make it clear i and B have no problem with X and Y hanging out with other friends it’s the disrespect we have gone through even after discussing with them what we clearly feel instead of putting up stories we actually talked but it always ended with “you guys are thinking too much” “ it’s not that serious” and never “we are sorry we made you feel this way” anyways my girlfriend B is a veery aware of her emotions person and she wants to cut them both off but I insisted to hold on a little longer. Fast forward to June 2024 till now many instances have happened where i and B have been disrespected and not heard, so we joined the same gym as X and Y, so we asked if they would like to go to the gym with us, they usually go in the evening and we due to certain commitments prefer going in the afternoon, so to the invite they say if they will have their food they will join us, so afternoon in the gym i was waiting for them and guess what they went to watch movie with some other friends and with all the disrespectful events, i got really pissed and decided to block X and Y and so did my girlfriend blocked them! However, i thought that because X has been my friend for a long time i shall meet and discuss and i let him know that you guys have been blocked and then I explained why and we came to a conclusion that no matter what happens between Y and B i and X would remain friends When i met X he had not noticed that he has been blocked so when i met him I immediately said you and Y are blocked BUT HE DID NOT LISTEN anyway after clearing things with X i unblock him and send him a request he then proceeded to dm me and ask “did you block me to i?” I was like yes i told you .X then proceeds to flip out and starts freaking out and says stuff like how could you block me? This doesn’t work like that i am confused as to why this reaction when things have already been talked about in between of the argument he proceeds to involve my girlfriend and says “from the time B has arrived in the city since then you have become like this” and not only says this once but 100 of times and literally starts blaming my girlfriend on the call while Y is on a conference listening. (Even after X including my girlfriend i did not cross the line to include X’s girlfriend in the conversation) But he still has the audacity to say that i and B target Y when not even once we mentioned her. I and B are trying our best to tell them that this is what we were talking about and how you guys are still not listening. But after 2 days of fight they still called us immature for blocking them (when i and B saw no future with them and didn’t see any difference with or without them in our life) so we blocked them and gave them a kind explanation but they still chose to tell us how i and B are immature and whatever we both feel is petty and how they are superior for letting petty things go. Where i and B were just looking to end things calmly X and Y made everything about themselves and things got really ugly till the end. So AITA
NOTE: Sorry for such a long message,it’s the first time posting on reddit, also wanted a safe place to vent out and get good advices.

Trigger warning: medical stuff & the death process. I do not give permission for this to be on any other platform.
I met him on fb dating. We chatted for a while and then for 2 or 3 weeks did 2-4 hour phone calls every night. We met 2 days after Christmas, and were taken with each other. He swept me in his arms and crooned “can’t help falling in love” by Elvis in my ear while we danced. I was head over heels and remained that way for the 2.5 years we were together. He went to detox, it worked, and he stayed clean for 27 months. Hadn’t been sober that long since he was an early teen.
My boyfriend and I were “on a break” while I was in the psych ward, then a step down to find me temporary housing. I spent 2 months in the hospital. While I was in there he would call and tell me he was going to come rescue me, take me to the beach, how he needed me to get him through detox again, told me he loved me dozens of times. Then silence for a month, followed by texts during the hour “phone time” at the step down where we were allowed on our phones. He texted me Saturday night, told me he loved me, there was another girl, he’d always be there for me. I found out it was the last text he sent.
That night, the Saturday before I got out, he fell and they found hard drugs in his system (he was only a pot head & sober, but started drinking and whatever again the week I went in). He had gone back to hanging out with an old unsavory crowd.
I was upset on Sunday when I saw the texts and sent some angry responses. I got out Wednesday, didn’t hear from him and thought he was ghosting me. Found out after contacting his enmeshed mom on Thursday night that he had been on life support with irreversible brain damage among other things. They kept him on life support due to his checking the donor box on the drivers license form.
The family respected his and my relationship a lot and let me come visit the next day, then the next, then they let me be there for when life support was pulled Sunday. They couldn’t handle being in the room with him.
I saw the nurses come, open his eyelids, and watch his eyes not respond. He only jerked when there was pain applied but didn’t respond to anything else. They had him on versed and morphine and fentanyl and another one prior to removal of life support. I reattached his air tubes when they would fall out, wiped the saliva that he was soaked in, and wiped sweat off his face. Sat next to him in bed and held him, talked to him, all of it.
I was in the OR when they pulled life support and expected him to pass, to stop breathing on his own. He kept breathing and I laid down in the bed with my head on his chest next to him and told him I loved him over and over, sobbing over this gorgeous man for almost the whole 90 minutes. He kept breathing.
They took him out of the OR after 90 minutes as he no longer qualified for donor status. I couldn’t leave him though. He kept going through the night and the next. I spent a lot of time in the bed next to him, sucking secretions from his lungs with a tool they gave me and asking for pain medicine at the right intervals (they stopped the flow of pain meds and were only giving him pain meds as needed). He would exhibit pain symptoms, his jaw would clench so hard his teeth were jammed out of place and his tongue would get stuck between his teeth. Massaging his jaw would get it to calm a bit. His eyelids would open but his eyes were rolled back in his head. His chest and heart were visibly working so hard in his 160 lb 6 foot frame.
His older brother was in a major fight with him, and that first night he went though my BF’s phone and found other women he was talking to over the last 2 months. He used my bf’s phone to text-yell at me about staying with my bf, telling me he had found all this evidence that the bf was “cheating” on me, telling other women he loved them. Then got mad I wasn’t leaving his side. It hurt. I knew that he was dating, so not cheating, but to love so quickly? I was out of the bed for a few hours, angry, sad.. and that’s when he had the most tooth movement and pain. I felt immediately bad and wouldn’t leave him the rest of the time. Everyone called me the girlfriend and I was still the girlfriend. I was the one there who could help him. Drunk bf did some shitty things. Doesn’t mean I didn’t love every inch of that man and his amazing brain.
We stayed in the ICU for a day and then we were moved to a different floor. Every nurse, assistant, even the doctor that came to see him got shown pictures of the man he was, all dressed up as his favourite superhero for Halloween (he was the Spider-Man of his neighborhood for years).
The second room we were in Monday night was a holding floor, awaiting people going home or going to hospice. Getting the ICU clear. They were kind to us, until the night nurses came around. He was prescribed morphine as needed every 15 minutes but he clearly couldn’t ask for it. I pressed that call button as much as they would let me. He would squeeze my hand when he was in pain, I don’t know if that was an automatic response or not but that’s how I knew he was in pain. Still I laid by him in the hospital bed, trying to keep him calm.
After 51 hours, with only 2 15 -30 minute naps he allowed me to take, I desperately needed to get back to my house 2 hours away and get my medications. I’m a week out of the psych ward at this point and shaky as fuck. His parents both came to visit separately, and for a max of 10 minutes. They couldn’t handle what was going on.
The people in charge found room at the hospice and moved him there Tuesday afternoon. I made sure he was comfortable, kissed his head and hands and told him I loved him. I played a few of his favourite songs to let him sleep to and left to go back and get my meds.
Wednesday I slept in my own bed, took my meds and felt too woozy to go back and thought I’d take a day to make sure I could do more to help through the next week.
He passed Wednesday afternoon while his dad was sitting by him.
The last few weeks have been a numb blur. What was supposed to be me working to get a job and move from the temporary living space turned into trying to heal from everything. Cleaning the porn off his laptop & phone (both were given to his niece) His parents elected to get him cremated. I made them a Shutterfly book (while intensely applying for work so I don’t lose my temporary living space) with memories of him and it will be delivered this Friday, his birthday, along with the urn they ordered.
The 2 alcoholic sons both lived with their parents and my bf’s room is full of trinkets and books and things that he would do instead of working, instead of drinking.
Yesterday I held the box of his ashes in his room and played can’t help falling in love and other songs and swayed with him, crying. I showed his dad different treasures in his room and stories behind them. Some of his favourite books, and why. Showed him his son’s favourite boots and told him the story of how we found them and how they would change the whole way he walked. I discreetly took his sex toys out of his room so his family wouldn’t have to deal with them.
I hope a small part of him was comforted not being alone, being helped in the hospital. Knowing I’d take care of stuff.
My bf may not have considered me his boo anymore. He’s always going to be mine. I wasn’t ever able to erase the feeling that I wasn’t who he would have preferred by his side, but the girl he was with was an ex who had done some despicable things to the family. She was invited to see him for a short time before life support was pulled to say goodbye but wasn’t allowed any other time. All of this sent her from drinking a bottle of vodka a day to more, she couldn’t and still can’t keep it together. She’s even told me he told her how much I love him and how much he still loved me. She sent me selfies with presents he made for me that she was given. With duck face. That bitch.
All I kept and keep repeating in my head was all the times he said I love you to me the last few weeks of his life. The plans he made for us to go to the movies and cuddle. The plans to go on vacation.
I’m having trouble forgiving him, while still being in head over heels in love with him. I know I took on a lot of responsibility for keeping him sober that weren’t mine to feel.
Today I am drinking for the first time in a while. I wasn’t necessarily sober, just didn’t drink around him. I took Lunesta because I didn’t sleep last night.
Our relationship was so cocooned that I’ve lost a lot of my friends in the last while. I don’t know where to go, who to talk to about all this. He was my best friend, my cheerleader, my wailing wall.
That’s what’s going on. I’m lost without him. One of the last things he told me was how he admired me for my strength. I think I’m sapped.

Book One: Edge of Madness - Chapter One First Chapter Previous
They called him the champion of the Talisi. A lost prince, a man touched by the Gods. They spoke his name in the same context as the Vigons. They regarded him as one would a holy object, placed there to remind all that hope is not lost. Mairek lay in a bed weaved of vine reeds. He felt hopeless, encroached on all sides by a looming dread he could not quite determine its source. There were expectations that had to be met. With hope came the assurance of victory and the Talisi wanted war. They wanted to parade him at the forefront of the Talisi Green army. Dress him in green metal and have him wield half a spear.
Yes, half a spear. His signature trade mark. It was half a spear he'd used upon the Ganidan plain, all those months ago. It was half a spear that he'd used to turn the tide against the Binorians. And here, in his room within the Palace. It is half a spear that lay beside him.
He'd tried to return to Jamou, the village he and Ishar hailed from. But the Talisi would not have it. An entire cohort came for him, his father had stood outside their home, tears of disbelief streaming down his face as he watched his son being dragged away to Central Talisi. To stand before the new King of the Talisi, the late King Gans's son, King Mogich. There, before the King, he was forced to retell the events of the Ganidan Plain. Where forty thousand Talisi men had stood against half a million Binorian Legions. Where Talisi had lost its king. The Red Priests of Meena had gathered around the silver throne of the King, intent on discrediting his every word for his theatrics upon the plain did not come as a result of his connection to their Goddess Meena. No. It was another God's blessing that had been bestowed upon him.
A blessing that ensured he was free of the bubble of time. A blessing that enabled him to foretell the future, experience the present and derive meaning from the past in a way nobody ever has or will. He was against the flow of time, not as Ishar was with his blessing of chaos, no, for him perception graced his every thought and action. And time, ever present, sought a way to purge him free of the realm. But for now it ignored him as did he it.
He rejected the giant chamber that had been offered him. The windows were dangerous, a stray arrow from the Army practicing grounds could find him in his bed as he lay asleep. He rejected servants for one might accidentally trip and wash him with scalding hot water meant for his bath. Every option afforded him came with the tinge of time and its need to be rid of him. He evaded all options before they availed themselves and here, he found himself now. In a single room, narrow with four walls all around. No windows, no servants. The only opening a door and ventilation shaft above the door. Time had no means of ending him where he lay.
A wasp entered the room from the ventilation shaft, it buzzed as it explored its new found abode. Mairek grabbed the half spear laying beside his bed. He lifted and flicked it across the dimly lit room, the only light a lantern that was dwindling in fuel. The half spear spun across the room and collided with the wall before settling on the ground. At its tip sat the impaled wasp. The sharp point had impaled it through its thorax and its threat was no more. Mairek sighed and lifted his eyes to the ceiling. What I would give, Ishar, to be back in Jamou with you. You tending sheep and me tending my broken heart, where are you Ishar? I crave chaos, an end to this tide that I swim against.
It started as a cough from a servant in the Palace's coal chamber. A chamber maid tripped and fell with a curse. A Red priest yawned and within seconds Mairek knew what was happening. The movements people indulged in, the things thought to be accidents. The gestures and words and platitudes. They were all weaves upon the tapestry of time. A knock sounded at his door. He got up and answered it. Parting the door enough to confirm the heart beats he'd expected were indeed of the five men before him.
Tall men, taller than he, bulky with swords strapped to their sides. Adorned in leather armor. The best killers in Talisi. Killers hired to kill him. They had objected of course, objected the task of ridding Talisi of the only one of them who could channel a God. But Tari, Princess of Talisi and sister to King Mogich, had offered them a price they could not refuse. She hated him, of course, hated him because he was part of her father's death. Part of the reason she no longer had a father. Sure, it was Ishar who'd led King Gans to a war facing impossible odds. But Ishar wasn't around. Nobody knew where the Kolotian and his lover, Niada, had gone to. So it was up to him to suffer the consequences.
"The King requires your presence." The one at the forefront said with a slight bow. The rest of the men rested their hands on the hilt of their blades. A clear sign that they were agitated, wary even. Mariek smiled.
"You carry swords, isn't it customary for the Green Army to prefer spears save in close combat? An ideal condition such as now?" Mariek asked.
The one who'd spoken to him chuckled. "We're used to the weight of the blade, Champion of the Talisi."
Champion of the Talisi. The title was a bane to him. He wanted to thrash against its constraints, to run away, flee from the duty it demanded of him. It was mid afternoon. The Palace wasn't as packed as it was during the early hours of the day. The King would never demand his presence at night so this was the best time for their ruse. Where would they lead him to? Where would he meet his end?
"Where is the King?" Mairek asked.
"He's at the Conicual Garden, west of the Palace bridge." Their leader answered. Mairek nodded. That would be an ideal place to die. It'll give him a chance to see the river curving through Talisi, to observe the sinking sun and to be kindred once more with all that went on around him. He felt time's gentle nudge, beckoning him into its embrace where his death will spell an end to his torment. An end to the struggle against time, a struggle he was sure he could not win. Why then shouldn't he relent? Throw in the towel and call it quits? What value marked him, that a God would pick him above the rest? No, Nielda had made a mistake. What was even the point of going all the way to the garden? Wouldn't it be fitting for his end to be quick?
"I hear the King," Mairek said. "He is speaking to the Chief Palace servant about a cartload of wine due from Remu. He is in the throne room, not the garden." The men shuffled uneasily. "You're here to kill me." He took a step back, leaving his door ajar. He went to the center of the room, knelt down and bore his neck to them. "Make it quick, a quick thrust in the neck ought to do it. But then again, you guys are the experts."
They hesitated. Each uncertain of their purpose. Mairek hated uncertainty, decisions spell the destiny time offers. To titter on the brink of a decision is to waylay time's purpose. "Be quick about it! Bastards!" That did it. They lunged towards him, swords rasping as they flew free of their scabbards. The point of the swords came to him and Mairek welcomed them, a smile played across his face. It was going to be over. He closed his eyes, waited for the sword tips to bite skin, draw blood. End his life. He waited a span of seconds and nothing seemed to happen. He opened his eyes, observed the blades inches from him, frozen in time.
"You fucking cunt." Nielda, the God of Space and Time spoke from behind him. He turned, found the God lounging on his reed bed. His skin was as dark as the midnight sky, and stars riddled it. His hair, like puffs of a cloud hovered about his head. His green eyes observed him with a haughty air Mairek had become used to.
"Nielda." He said, turning to regard the God who'd chosen him as his Champion.
"You can kill them all, all five of them as you did the wasp. Yet, here you kneel, like a weakling, welcoming their blades. You paint a sorry sight. Diva." Nielda said. Diva, the word was misused by the God, having dwelt so long in the place between sky and moon, the God had lost touch with humanity, his vigil against a darkness he was hesitant to comment on had stripped Nielda of knowledge regarding the advancement of the human race.
"I just want it to end, I know no peace, Nielda. No peace at all." Mairek said. He got up off the ground, went to the rear end of the reed bed and placed himself there. Close to the naked feet of the God. The dusk colored robe adorning Nielda shifted as he sat up to regard his champion.
"Peace? When a buck grazes in the Talisi wilderness, no predator in sight. Does he regard the moment afforded it as peaceful? Does it relish in it, hence lowering its guard to fully appreciate the ambiance that comes with a lack of danger? Peace is a fickle thing, the buck knows this. Its ears are ever alert lest the sound of a Yendw wolf's approach marks the end of its peace. Is that then, what peace is? A moment between danger, afforded by pure circumstance? If such a thing is peace then what benefit is craving something you know will have an end?" Nielda raised his hand and scratched at his scalp, the hair floating about it parted for a brief moment. The God rarely had mannerisms similar to that of mankind but as time went, Mairek noticed changes in the God's disposition. "Think of your time since leaving the Ganidan Plain, Diva, has there been any instance when your life was threatened save now? Can this then be regarded as a peaceful period, a time when time has ignored you and thus given you a period of rest? Of course time wouldn't ignore you forever, it must seek to right an anomaly and you should liken this as a Yendw wolf's paw upon a branch, young buck, and this should drive you to flee knowing that the peace afforded you has reached its end."
Mairek sat with his knees brought up and his arms circling the crest of his legs. He nodded his acquiesce. His eyes moved to the five men, frozen in time, their blades pointed at where he once knelt awaiting a quick death. The buck would not await the maw of the Yendw wolf, it will flee if possible and if not it would fight, hoping for a brief respite from death that might grant it another period of peace. Is this then what peace is? "I hear everything Nielda." Mairek started. "I see everything, even with my eyes closed. I feel everything as if my hand is forever grasping things and my tongue tastes things that I am yet to consume. Is this gift of yours a mark of peace? How will my sanity be anchored to me with all that I perceive?"
Nielda sighed. "You're a dumbass Mairek. A dumbass, if you can hear everything why don't you focus on the sound that pleases you the most? If you can see everything why not focus on an image that delights your soul? Perception is not confounded on the whole, you can focus on specific aspects of it that appease you."
"Is that what you did when you hovered above space for thousands of years? Did you focus on a specific sound while you were up there among the stars?" Mairek pushed. He knew if he kept up a barrage of questions regarding Nielda's time guarding the darkness above from an ancient evil, he might gleam something... Anything that would paint a vivid picture for him, a picture whose purpose he was yet sure of.
Nielda stared at Mairek and his eyes flashed a bright blue. The assassins started moving slowly and Mairek knew that time was regaining its flow. "No." Nielda said. "The one whose voice I wanted to hear was silent."
Time resumed its course and the assassins thrust into open air. Missing their mark. They turned, puzzled expressions about their faces to regard Mairek at the foot of the reed bed. Mairek sighed. "Your deaths won't be on my head." He said as he stood up.
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The sun pierced the earth with its morning glow. Palace servants shambled about, eager to get on with their work. Guards stationed in various Palace compartments stood at alert, stifling yawns and conversing in low tones. The Palace kitchen was alight with activity, cooks chattered as dough rose and logs were fed into furnaces. Chamber maids emptied chamber pots. The King sat upon his throne and offered a silent prayer to Meena with the aid of the Red Priests, as it was custom for the King of Talisi with every new dawn. The gardeners tended the Conicual garden, pruning branches and inspecting bright colored petals. The daily routine of the Palace was under way, without a single anomaly felt or seen by all within the Palace.
It started as a scream when the maid sent to bring him his morning meal came across him leaving his tiny compartment. The maid ran away, screaming like a banshee and flinging his tray of food to the ground. Mairek flexed his shoulders and started walking towards Princess Tari's bed chamber. Where he knew she was inspecting an assortment of dresses, picking the best she would dawn for the first half of the day. With the maid's screams came the shuffling of feet, guards, cooks, gardeners, maids, Red Priests. They all flocked towards him, and when their eyes beheld him, they halted, words escaped them. Trembling gripped their limbs and all they could do was stare. They flanked him on all sides, and followed behind him at a distance. He did not turn his head to either side, he ignored them as he ignored the blood that trailed his path, marking his wake.
At another time, in another place. The five decapitated heads he held by their hair, three on his right hand and two on his left, would have sickened him. Their weight would have pulled at his soul and he would have been distressed by the action he was undertaking. But now, he felt nothing. He experienced everything and felt nothing. I am a buck, antlers riddled with the blood of a Yendw wolf, affording me an extended period of peace. And that was all he could define the moment as.
The Guards he came across took one look at him and let him pass, none too eager to test his patience. He climbed the steps leading to Princess Tari's chambers. A throng of Palace personnel behind him. The two Guards flanking either side of the Chamber's door halted him, placing heavy gauntleted hands on his chest.
"You cannot pass." One of them said, he towered over him and Mairek raised his head to observe him. He was aware of what a sight he was. Blood was sprinkled upon his face and stained his arms. The heads dripped blood on the floor and the smell of iron was rich wherever he went.
Mairek closed his eyes, felt the touch of the gauntlets upon his chest, he allowed himself to drift into the metal, to learn of its origin and how they came to be where they were now, upon him. The past is a vast sea, to swim its depths one requires a mind that can fragment, be two places at once, and in that current at the bed of time he was able to learn what he needed. He opened his eyes and turned his head to either guard. "These gauntlets, you place them on the bath house door, parting it gently to observe the Princess as she baths. A wretched thing both of you do, ogling the one you're tasked to protect. A simple reprimand wouldn't be enough, I will see both your heads on a spike at the Palace baths if you do not give me leave to do as I plan. I mean to cause no harm." He could not see their faces behind their helms, but he knew the look of shock and shame spread upon their visage. Shame, the anointed cousin of retreat, see as his gauntlets lower from my chest. See as they withdraw within, each of them eager to be rid of me within a miasma of indifference.
The Guards parted. Mairek raised a leg and knocked down the chamber door with one swift kick. The door sprung free of its hinges, tumbled and collapsed onto the ground, close to the foot of the Chamber bed. A good five feet within the Chamber. Tari stood, half naked with maids around her, her bosom rich and full, stilled as she regarded him. Then heaved as she saw what he dragged into her chamber.
Mairek walked onto the door and flung the heads onto the bed, watched as the blood seeped into the white linen cover of the duvet. Staining it a bright crimson. The heads stared in various poses, unblinking, sightless. Princess Tari gawked at them then raised her eyes to meet his.
"Their blood is on your head." Mairek said and turned around to depart. Those crowded behind him parted and in his wake eyes followed his retreating back.
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My sister has three kids, all from different dads. Complicated story I will not go into and don’t need any judgment on my sisters life choices. All three kids are close in age, 6f, 5f, 3m. Now the two daughters dad are not in the picture and the kids have no knowledge of them. Let’s just say they aren’t the best of people, so bad my sister had to leave the state. She moved down near me and shortly after, met a guy at work, they soon got pregnant and moved in together. They lived together for four Apartment leases, so 4 years. All kids call him dad and know him as dad.
Him and my sisters relationship was not so good and they broke up but still lived together the last year because of inflation. Well once the lease ended they both went to their own apartments and co parenting was rocky. For the first few month they spit time equally and all three kids knew the schedule. Then the ex started hanging out more with his work friends and wouldn’t take kids on his days. On days that weren’t his he would say he missed his son and only toke him. They girls didn’t mind because they liked having girl time with mommy. Soon it got to every time they fought he would use the girls against my sister saying he wouldn’t be in girls life anymore. Next day he would take it back and my sister so desperately wanted the girls to have him that she would take it.
Two things happen that made her realize that it was better not for the guy to be in the girls life. (There was many of red flags that she looked passed before so those were also a factor)
1- the 5f s birthday was coming up and she planed a party for a Saturday because the ex doesn’t work that day. She let him know a head of time. It’s the week or so before and she brings up the time and where it will be to him but he said he forgot and already made plans with his friends that he already paid for it and can’t cancel. That conversation did not go well and my sister was not happy.
2- A few days after that birthday conversation she over heard a phone call he was on. It was the exs day with the kids and my sister forgot to send one of the kids meds with him. She texted him with no response and drove over there to give the meds. Well through the door she could hear him bitching about her in front of the kids who were playing in the living room right next to him and he brought up the two girls fathers while the kids were in the same room. When she knocked on the door to give kid meds she was not happy. She took all three kids.
That was the moment she knew it was for the best he shouldnt be in the girls life because clearly he didn’t want to. (Some more things he said in the phone call) He was already showing favoritism towards the boy and the girls were starting to pick up.
The second week just happened and the girls don’t understand why only their brother gos to dads. The girls are upset and so was the son who wanted his sisters to come. It’s been hard but my sister hasn’t told the kids because the birthday and she didn’t want to ruin it. Well she plans on telling them this week when the boy is at dads and she just has the girls.
How do you tell a 6 and 5 year old that the man they called dad is only gonna be a dad to their brother?
My sister wants me there for moral support and I just need some help because this is a hard conversation and I want to make sure I help her in any way possible and give her some suggestions on how to go about this conversation.
(Sorry for long post and grammaspelling. Typing on phone)