Hi , My name is Shiv , i am developing an app where we can help stray animals help and food, Using the app you can see nearby stray or injured animals. Just take a photo of the animal you find and post it. Nearby users will get notifications and can offer help, like giving food or assistance. If you don't have food but want to help, you can see if someone nearby is offering food and feed the animals. It's a simple way for people to lend a hand to animals in need.
You can find more details check Food4Pups roadmap,
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Here are some SS.

Hello, Thanks for stopping by, posting this again, already got a few interested users, looking for more as it helps. If you are looking to thrift apparels for personal use or to resell but don't know of any good places you can find them, I can help. Have been thrifting for personal use for the past 4-5 years and have found many gems at steal prices (Mostly 150-200 a piece). Brands include H&M, Zara, Vero Moda, Zara Basic, Forever 21, Jennyfer, Global Desi, Old Navy, Shein and many more. The apparels could be New with Tags, New Without Tags (Based on appearance) or pre loved. Needless to say this is for women only
DM Me if, -You can decide quickly whether to buy or to pass based on brand name, photo & size label. As it will be a live haul, being responsive & quick is essential, being slow spoils the flow. No compulsions to buy. -You wish to checkout what apparels are found during such hauls, no compulsions to buy -You need apparels for your wardrobe/personal use or to resell or need a wardrobe overhaul on a budget -You need thrifted apparels that do not have defects but don't know where to find them -Wish to experience authentic Mumbai street apparel shopping -College student looking for budget shopping -You understand all of the above & are comfortable on a women only whatsapp group
Don't DM me if, -You are expecting ironed, ready to wear apparels, these will need a wash + ironing upon arrival, no exceptions (This is thrifting lol) -You are expecting men's apparels -You are expecting accessories, bags, belts and other things -You are expecting apparels that will be the perfect fit, its a gamble, I can share the size if mentioned on the merchandise, cannot help beyond that
May speak with you over call to make you a part of smaller group, so men/creeps please don't even try, this is for women only.
Thanks, -delicate_sparkle

After speaking with a few members in this group and few outside this group this is what I have gathered from the market for my project
let me know if this perspective is accurate or not and feel free to add to it
Service providers in the market:
Wedding videographephotographer that charge between 5-25k per wedding doing 12-40 jobs a year
Desired situation:
To be the go to wedding videographephotographer in their locality and be recommended by top venues and planners as well as having a good reputation online and in the community as well as having a lot of profit for me and my family
Issues:
​

• Trying to show their creative side through their work as well as producing high quality work without “churning and burning” their customers
• Too much inquires coming in and wasting time with low quality inquires
• Trying to stay away from feast and famine months with their business
• Keeping a good name and image in the community
• Collaborating with venues and planners to get more high quality inquires
• Making sure to have a good and consistent online presence
• Spending a lot of time sorting and finding high quality leads
• Getting on the recommended vendors lists for venues and planners
• Being able to work “on” the business getting more inquires as well as them being a good quality

What are people trying to sell you:
​

• SEO: the issue they brought up… Does it even work? What are the quality of the people calling me?

​

• Social Media Management Agency: the issue they brought up no real ROI on the service the money would be better spent elsewhere

​

• Software: mainly business management software doesn’t actually target pain points really can only send invoices contracts and speak with customers but not actions that move the needle forward

​

• Full service social media: the person handling it doesn’t bring out the vision the client is looking for and the same issues with the social media management agency

Majority of your market:
Main pain point ( NEGATIVE FEEDBACK LOOP )
​

• Forget about quality of inquires not enough are even coming in
• Jobs are low budget and low quality ( making it difficult to create good marketing material for the business having good looking brides and grooms in a good venue high quality backgrounds which would’ve created a positive feedback loop )
• Difficult to get out the 1-3k price range when marketing materials aren’t as good and are stuck delivering for clients to make sure the services were good

WORD OF MOUTH IS EVERYTHING IN THIS INDUSTRY
Softwares that are popular in the market currently use:

• Stripe (Payment processor)
• Gmail
• Adobe Suite
• Mac OS
• Facebook
• Instagram
• Honeybook
• Helsome (Payment processor)
• Shoot proof (sends clients there images and videos)
• Studio Ninja ( Invoicing, contracts, customer management )

My question is what are people trying to shove down your throats?
like if you're running a wedding photography business what are people trying to sell you over emails or cold calls,
Are those things even use full to you?
I noticed the big boys that help provide tools are mainly honeybook and studio ninja ( my study is strictly from a business POV not actually delivering i.e ( editing videos, sending to clients etc ) things that push the needle ( marketing, reviews, word of mouth ) ETC )
Could you share with me for example,
what you would prefer if you were looking to grow your photography business
​
1) All in one tool where you can manage your social media ( Facebook, insta ), Follow up on inquires automatically also with AI so you can sift through shitty ones and save time, Build workflows that automatically ask for referrals on your behalf so you don't have to remember,
sending personalized messages a year after you shot your clients weddings, Basically all the things that you know you should be doing but because if your hectic schedule it's a bit difficult to fit in and be constant with it building your reviews and testimonials
which will make your life easier with trying to get into the big venues and get better clients not to mention save you so much money rather than hiring an agency to do it and paying between 10-20k yearly
OR
2) Have an outside agency or person handle all those things for you white glove service style where you pay 10-20k yearly but you have the same benefit as the tool but with an element of human error but you'd also get the benefits of having a human eye as well as an extra set of hands for customer service
​
I want to gather accurate info and see what you guys deal with on a day to day and what areas you'd like to improve
​
​
View Poll

Successor : u/Intel81994
Hi,
I first found this subreddit and Neville's works in 2018 so I thought I'd share my success/experiences.
I've never posted here, only lurked... daily. I often see people post tiny wins in here like manifesting a test result or a few hundred dollars. I don't see many huge wins except occasionally, or multi-year life changing creations.
Well, I'm not where I want to be bc my goals have gotten a lot bigger, but I've come a long way and finding this work in 2018 changed my life so I want to share with you how.
Not to discourage, but small wins are nothing compared to the deep life changes and incredible abundance you can create in knowing who you really are - just think - there are people out there, several, who own $10M+ houses, multi-millionaires, many came from nothing.
I'm not saying that's the only thing worth striving for or even the source of joy, of course. But my point is anything you want, someone else out there has done it, they are just humans like myself and you.
So here's how my life turned around since 2018 and what I created. The HOW I did so is no different than what you already read on this sub every day.
Neville has been my favorite teacher and this is the MAIN sub I have read over the last few years. I own all of his books and have read them several times.
I regard his methods as most influential for me. This may come off as some motivational story but truth is I use Neville's methods daily and always try to understand and control my beliefs to grow.
Here is how my life changed completely after DOING the work:

• MONEY/TRAVEL : I went from -50k in debt running my own online fitness coaching business at my lowest point not knowing how I would pay rent (long story but I was young and not skilled enough in business at this time to really build a team and 7 figure business like I wanted),

to acquiring amazing skills being an intrapreneur working in a small startup online with a terrific mentor (I manifested this exact position with SATS), traveled the world a crazy amount in the exact places I had wanted to and met a ton of cool people (SATS), over 27 countries now, and grew my net worth to over 250k from 2018-2021.
To my current goals, this is really nothing now and I now surround myself with people doing a ton more than me. So I'm not preaching here, it's just levels to the game right.
I now work professionally in the crypto industry, but also have skills and knowledge to a few types of online businesses in the consulting & marketing space, as well as make money from markets/trading, which is a great vehicle because there are effectively no limits.
I can live anywhere I want, have plenty of cushion and money to live mostly how I want (have larger goals now), have time freedom as well, and most of all, love growth and feel great striving for more. I did SATS to get my current gig.
I've also been trading the last 2 years and no it's not easy, in fact you're competing against algorithms and the best minds in the world so the learning curve is quite steep.
Trading is not easy money, but the potential is there. Besides, trading is just one vehicle, it's not value-additive to the market like businesses are, so I believe it's best used in conjunction with a business/job, and investing longer term is better.
Anyway I turned <40k into ~350K in crypto, and a separate stock portfolio last year.
And yes a lot of that crypto growth was market timing and luck with everything going on, monetary policy and all, and I know people who turned less into several million and also plenty who got liquidated and lost millions. I still spent a lot of time and skill to create that, point is I created all of it in various forms.

• FITNESS/HEALTH: I achieved a more fit and better body than 98% of men have. This was a result of hard work plus these methods and was in 2018 when I decided to undergo a bodybuilding prep for a photoshoot. Great size, leanness, abs, I had been lifting for years but never gotten this in shape.

It was not easy, but I looked incredible, and the exact city/water background scene I had visualized for the photos happened. You can scroll to my IG posts from early 2018 for pics proof.
My health is impeccable and I've for sure made other physical changes, and I think I somehow changed my gf's looks to become better over time too. She was always quite cute though. I'm still very much in shape but now do yoga daily for last few years, as well as lifting.

• LOCATION/LIVING: I manifested the EXACT view I used to visualize in the center of my major city, with a gorgeous view of the ocean and city both, for a great price and have lived here for last 3 years now. In a luxury high rise. I can see ships and yachts right outside my balcony every day. It's literally grander than I even knew to imagine just 5 years ago.
  
• MORE FINANCE: Over the last 2 years my investments and more were doing so well sometimes - not always - that I often was able to have some months making 20-40k, point is I was not worried about work.
  

I also believe parallel realities are real and I used to visualize Bitcoin going to 50k back in 2019 when it had stayed below <10k for 2 years. This was not all due to bitcoin, but rather all sorts of investments, but yes crypto as well.
Some was luck, some was skill and work. All was my creation. I also got quite decent at trading and managing a portfolio that I not only managed to publicly call the exact day of the market TOP in november 2021 but also sniped the bottom in July. Intuition plus knowledge.
So I kept this money, it is not bleeding out in my portfolio with the market. I've devoted a LOT into mastering this craft but again, self concept and Neville helped.
I got hacked for 60k-70k a few months back and chose to give it new meaning and manifested a career change to crypto industry, landing a position making over 10k per month (I'm not happy with this at my current standards of income, but I'm grateful), that I am growing to 20k per month of active income now with other streams.
What's interesting in my recent career manifestation is I decided I want a position that basically pays me to do what I already do (I was independently researching and managing a multi-6 figure crypto portfolio... over a quarter million dollars combined money that I was managing. )
I now get paid a full time 6 fig salary to do nothing extra from what I was already doing and barely work on the actual job with plenty of time for other stuff.
I just decided it was done and that's it. Also of course it's remote... knowing what I know, I will only consider remote jobs (never worked in a physical office and I've actually never had a w2 job before this, always doing sales and stuff or my own thing).
I have been working on increasing my standard to 25k per month minimum of active income generation. Had a lot of ideas come through. I’m just not the type to have a job I think but I have to figure out what I can build again.
Compared to who I want to be at a later date that’s also nothing much. Again, levels to the game.
Now also working on growing a business in this space. This hack event was pretty traumatic but I now see how I 100% manifested it. And I can choose to also create something far greater out of the event now.
With every job I've ever had, I've never worked in an office. I've only ever been remote or online because this is the only thing I was willing to accept. Being a digital nomad has been my norm since I graduated college.
Be specific in what you want and do not settle.
I went to a top 5 US public university and even manifested myself to lead a large pre-med club on campus (I was a pre med student) before I knew Neville. I'm now very glad I chose to go my own route instead of medicine for several reasons beyond scope of this post but anyway.

• SP: Manifested my SP (gf) back in 2018 and we have a great relationship going on 6 years now (together since 2016). I focus more on self love and feeling I AM God rather than seeking it externally. My consciousness and inner connection is my source of sustenance.
  
• Honestly there are so many other crazy little things I can't possibly keep track. Every day I have synchronicities like crazy still. I don't give them much meaning but just take it to mean that I am aligned.
  

My best mental model/tips

• Delude yourself into knowing that imagination is MORE real than the 3d. The 3d is 'old news.' Meaning it's a shadow world. The real creation is happening in your imagination, and there is a time lag in this physical world.

Live in your imagination and tune out anything that does not serve keeping you in an optimal state where you feel in control. The more you focus on things that are meant to distract you or displease you, which state do you create from?

• I do SATS during the day, works fine for me, I don't think it matters much if day/night, but you need to do it. Follow a guided hypnosis session to get deeper into trance first if it helps.
  
• Act and trust deeply that life is leading you to what you want, and the meaning you give to events is literally what molds your future. Choose empowering meanings. Stop being a victim.
  

Make a resolve to never think of yourself as a victim of forces out there, the economy, evil people, whatever it is. You want to control your reality then act like it internally.

• Make a daily routine checklist and stick to it so you internally feel in control of your reality. Mine is: SATS or revision, meditate or breathwork, EFT or writing, cold shower, no phone in the morning, wake at 6am, and of course I exercise daily in some form. I use a spreadsheet to make sure I hit my routines for the day so I don't be a victim but rather stay in control. This is critical for me.
  
• As long as you occupy the realms of consciousness that you want, the result WILL come via downloads and hunches and thoughts, and insane physical things will happen that will 'seem like it would have happened anyway' so don't worry about the how.
  

Random Musings
The thing with manifesting is we sometimes take a passive route and wait for things to happen to us (and sure this is fine and still works), but think- if you don't grow your mental, emotional, skills container to deal with large amounts of money, or a team, or skills to sell and market and manage money... if you suddenly get 500K or 1M, how are you going to hold on to it?
If you lack personal power and execution skills, say you suddenly win 5M from the lottery, do you have the skills to keep it and make decisions at a level that can fluctuate several millions? It's stressful and requires thinking completely differently.
You have to 'stress test' your consciousness and expand your container.
I know that because I got hacked (stolen) ~70k it means nothing because the version of me who makes multi-7 figures a year deals with fluctuations of multi-6 figures in his portfolio all the time, it's part of the game. and I HAVE dealt with 6 figure fluctuations in my portfolio before this hack so it wasn't super new in that sense.
You know time is not real, it's all happening now, Creation is already finished, so you should also know that the way to 'hack' time is making decisions from a place of the future version of yourself you already are.
Make a commitment to stop playing small and settling for crumbs. Why would you get hung up on the one limited way your ego thinks that abundance has to manifest in your life, or love, instead of just feeling the emotions themselves, knowing it's done, and letting your life color it in in grander ways than you could have imagined.
Funny little manifestations and things happen literally every day that I just take it as reflections of me being in my creative power.
Something crazy/funny that happened was on our last trip, I told my girlfriend 'hey, how funny and weird would it be to see a parrot meowing?' - then next day we sit at a cafe and there is a parrot in a cage outside, meowing loudly. The most bizarre manifestation, I didn't even intend for it, just asked hey would it not be funny. Things like this happen so often, I can't keep track.
There is nothing new to learn. Just do the techniques and do self care rituals and get lost in your work. Feel the feeling of utter abundance and freedom now and it will happen.
We live in an advanced economy with the internet, it has never been easier to start or fund a business compared to even 50 years ago (see interest rates), distribution has never been easier, so if you know these tools, why would you not create the biggest dream you can imagine? Why settle for a free $200?
I realize there are levels people go through however so I don't mean to belittle, but now that I have been through so much and grown, I know there is nothing separating myself from multi millions and VC's and creators of large companies except belief, work, and time in this reality.
I have the knowledge, belief, and skills to not need a job if I don't want one. I can instead offer something to the market and be independent.
I'm telling you this stuff works and is sustainable. You can be as specific as you want and get whatever you want, and trust that with the turns life takes you through, it is a BRIDGE meant to turn you into the person to get and sustain what you say you want. Decide it and it is so.
I am someone who is a first generation American immigrant, my parents moved to the US from India when I was 5 and we had very little here. I grew up 'lower' middle class, and didn't have the best money programming from parents, but I always did well in school.
I KNOW I am going to be the first multi millionaire in my family. It's all in how you think about yourself/self concept and the work you do from that mindset. Do actions and shift your environment in accordance with who you want to be.
I always splurge on self care now and do things like fly business class or pay more for a better room because that's who I internally am. Just find a way to produce more and let it flow instead of shrinking yourself to be someone you’re not in your 4D
I don't try to scrimp and penny pinch, I let money flow. Even though getting stolen 70k was traumatic, oh well, I chose to give it a better, empowering meaning and my reality shifted.
That's all I have to say. Do the work. Stop procrastinating with learning. All the teachers, scripture, it's all the same Truth at the core. Learning is fine because you learn different mental models at different points of your life but you need to do the work.
I've been fortunate to not only have explored TONS of teachers and books in this realm, you name it I've probably read it or have a copy, I've also HAD mentors and WORKED directly under multi millionaires older and more experienced than me who know this work very well and knew Neville specifically, and it's the real deal. I did sales for someone in the online coaching space was was very well off and had decades of success and spoke of Neville very often, it was really cool.
Proof of the Law
I don't know what more proof you need that the Law is real. All religions throughout eternity have known this, Neville just distilled the same Truth through his own methods that work really well in my opinion and I personally love his interpretation of scripture.
The most successful people in the world are usually consciously (and some unconsciously) doing these same actions. Just do the work and focus on it coming from a good place of knowing that it's done. You don't need to know HOW but you just need to know the plane is going to somehow land one day.
I just come back to Neville every time, because his methods are simple and philosophies work well for how I think. I've done tons of psychedelic mushrooms over the years which luckily made me very open to this sort of thinking, before that I was very rigid and too '3d scientific' minded in my thinking. Keep in mind there is actually nothing 'unscientific' about the Law... modern science has its own limitations in that we cannot measure many things.
What used to be called magic in years past is now under the realm of science right? I'm not saying I don't value logic and science... I have a science degree from a top 5 university.
I'm just saying your ego mind which wants to keep you stuck and surviving uses the excuse of logic and science when that's actually not the full scope of how reality works, we are incredibly limited in our conscious understanding of reality.... we don't even know what we're doing here on a floating rock in infinite space and we can hardly see much of the light spectrum as it is.
So remember that when your ego tries to believe in your limitations and the 3d reality only. You being here is magic that even the most advanced science does not know the answer to. Do scientists know fundamentally why there is something at all instead of nothing?
Anyway, one more thing is I've never been shy of making relatively bold and fast decisions, investing in a mentor (for business) and just generally betting on myself.
Because getting around people who think bigger than you and don't settle is a hack and it's worth every penny. There is a reason millionaires hang with other millionaires.
I'm not saying to cut people out of your life (unless toxic) but rather to seek proximity and get around winners or pay to join some mastermind in business or whatever you need to do to network in your realm.
Just last week I invested 7.5k for get into a network of high performing young male entrepreneurs just because I want a better network in real life and work on business tactics and execution. When I was 23 I invested 25k that I did not have at the time (I made it happen and earned it back) to get a business mentor. So I use all of this in combo with Neville's methods primarily. I really like revision method as well.
The act of DECISION literally creates a parallel reality and becomes the new bridge to your manifestation.

Tier List: https://imgur.com/a/8uZCpGy
Oh boy, is this one gonna be a can of worms. Let's dive in headfirst!
"I'll school you in this battle of the baddest Bruce, with your He-Man haircut and your Daisy Dukes." It's an unremarkable line, but the rhythm here is pretty kickass, and I love the choregraphy of Jenner doing stretches in time with the beat, it's a really satisfying visual. "I hear you're good at running, you're just like the Flash. Especially in the 100-meter ditch-your-wife dash." Decent attack. They never fail to use someone getting divorced as material for a diss, do they? Banner looming over his beakers and microscope is a nice visual, and "You turned one gold medal to a lifetime of green; the most overrated athlete anyone's ever seen" is a competent enough attack. "You need to carry fatherhood across that finish line; kept up with the Kardashians but left some kids behind" is, again, a decent enough diss. A lot of material about Jenner's family here; I guess that's to be expected. There's still one or two much more obvious lines of attack to make, but I suppose Banner is just saving his best stuff for the end, right? He certainly wasn't saving it for the end of this verse, in which he just references the fact that he transforms when he gets pissed off without fashioning it into much of an attack or boast. The use of strings in the music here is a really nice touch, although I'd say the green screen effect with Bruce standing in front of those neurons or whatever ain't looking so hot.
Actually, the green screen effects for this battle broadly aren't the best. That stadium Jenner's standing in is looking pretty low-res. "I think you're in your element when you're behaving badly; honestly you're kind of boron when you're happy." It's a corny pun, but the sentiment is true enough. "I'll lap and pass your ass ten different ways. Decathlon athlete blast through you like some gamma rays." This is filler; it's fine, rhythm sounds pretty good, but it's just taking up space. "The truth is there's no truce between the Bruces, you're a drifter being useless, I'm a winner, no excuses!" That's a lot of playing on the same rhyme in a short period of time, and I dig that: truth/truce/Bruces/useless/excuses, hell yeah. I guess some of those aren't proper rhymes so much as, what's the word... assonance, maybe? It's good writing, is the point. The visuals panning in and out of this home gym is a nice touch too, and a nice parallel to Banner's sequence with his lab. "Beatiful women all up on my jock, I got a home gym, check me on the cereal box, Doc!" The rhythm Jenner's spitting here rules, this beat is low-key one of the better ones they've done. It's also a nice boast, and that Wheaties visual is pretty great. "You big green freak, don't try to flex; if it wasn't for your cousin, you'd never have sex!" Okay, this line goes super hard and I think it's one of the most underrated ones in ERB history. AND it's got one of the funniest visuals in the way Jenner pops in on that roller shouting "OHH!" while Banner suffers. That bit lives rent-free in my head. "You're so strong when you get mad, too bad you can't go back to protect your mom from your dad!" Holy fucking SHIT, this goes hard! The flow here kicks all kinds of ass, and we've got a 3x rhyme combo going on with mad/bad/dad; I LOVE odd numbers of rhymes! It's also just an extremely savage low blow. Another line that doesn't get enough credit. Jenner is kicking Banner's ass so far.
One questionable and inadvisable transformation sequence later, The Hulk comes in to spit a few bars. But only a few. "That painted face don't give you class; just one more thing Bruce do for cash!" Interesting argument. "Best thing you make? Kylie ass! She eighteen? Hulk SMASH!!" I do think this is a pretty funny way to reduce Jenner's legacy to Kardashian bullshit, and the Hulk SMASH joke always gets a strong reaction out of people.
Fully transitioned Caitlin Jenner comes in with "That's my teenage daughter, man, I have to forbid this; I'll put a javelin through your jolly green discus." Decent lines. Good way for Caitlin Jenner to brag about her athletic achievements while also throwing a Jolly Green Giant jab in. "Kylie not the kinda girl I'm gonna let you smash on; you'll get the medal without the decathlon!" I like the medeal/metal wordplay here, although Caitlin Jenner dual-wielding pistols and firing them at the Hulk feels extremely out of left field.
"Hulk is Hulk! No identify as man! Me thinks Cait might understand!" Pretty funny line, and Caitlin's reaction is also amusing. "No gender issue; this Jenner issue! Just you being you is enough to diss you!" So that's it, then? They're really not going to bring that one thing up, eh? I feel like that closing line would land a lot better if they did.
"Look I understand that you hate yourself; but you don't need to blame yourself." Oh, huh. That's different. Let's see where this therapy session goes. "You're a tiger, stop trying to tame yourself; you gotta be big enough to contain yourself." Well... I like that she's mixing things up by rhyming with the penultimate word instead of the last word, that's always something. Beyond that, I don't think these lines are accomplishing much. "And get hit with a little forgiveness! Be green, it ain't none of my business!" That line's pretty funny, as is the tea-sipping visual. "But if you think you're looking good in those torn-ass clothes; you're lying, which means you need a new wardrobe!" That's a reference to The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, which has absolutely nothing to do with this matchup. Feels out of place because of it. And it's not a very strong diss besides, feels like padding. Doubly strange to end her verse on it. "The visions of those shorts kinda scarred me; what'd you just rage at a Barney themed party?" Oh, there's more? Alright. This burn is really lame. Barney jokes? Come aaaaaaaahhhhhn, what are we doing here? That line should have definitely been left on the cutting room floor. "That's probably not something you seen as a child; not one day did you see your daddy smile!" Okay. She already established that Hulk's father was abusive in her first verse, and while it was a powerful blow there, here it feels much more toothless. "Hulk not strong enough to deal with denial! Laying you down easy; that's kitchen tile!" The first line is pretty amusing with how Caitlin imitates The Hulk's speech, but that second line... why? Pretty weaksauce way to finish her performance off, but whatever. Also not a fan of these visuals with the diamonds, feels like they wanted to add some visual flair but couldn't think of a good way to do it so they settled on Caitlin popping out of diamonds which is just odd. "Examine this under your microscope; you've got no neck, but you still fucking choked!" Oh. This verse is still going? Okay. Well, it's a good line. "After battling me, you're gonna always be pissed! So the Hulk will stay forever, neither Bruce will exist!" You know, that's actually a pretty strong closer, but I can't help but feel like it's undercut by just how long that verse was dragging on.
Okay, so. I feel it should be pointed out that there's a lot of people who were always going to hate this battle for making the decision not to attack Caitlin for being trans. Furthermore, the overwhelming sentiment has been that Banner won this; it bears keeping in mind that there's a lot of transphobes out there who were going to say the Hulk won no matter what happened simply because Caitlin is trans. So to that end, I think that a fair amount of the hate this battle gets, and the hate that Caitlin's performance gets, is bullshit. But there are still some big criticisms that need to be made.
So let's be honest: they threw the match for Caitlin. Or at least attempted to. You might still think the Hulk managed to win, but with that insanely long final verse it's pretty clear they tried to make Caitlin the 'canon' winner, as with Thomas Jefferson vs. Frederick Douglass. They did this presumably because it was pride month, and they wanted to say Trans Rights with a trans rapper that gets a positive portrayal. I can get behind that sentiment, but the execution is questionable to say the least.
Like... I'm not trans, but I have trans friends, and I think I know enough about trans issues from being around them to point out that there's a lot of stuff here that's pretty shitty. For one, the cardinal rule that everybody knows is that you're not supposed to misgendedeadname a trans person, and the title of this battle is Bruce Banner vs. Bruce Jenner. So from the get-go, before the video even starts playing, we're getting some mixed signals here. Are we to take from this that they made the tactical decision to go ahead and deadname Caitlin for the sake of the matchup making intuitive sense(what with it obviously being a play on their similar names), and then try and do a hard pivot and make Caitlin win the battle to avoid criticism for that decision? Feels like maybe they could have just not gone with this matchup instead. The whole transformation element also seems dubious, but I could see someone reasonably landing either way on whether that's actually an issue or just silly fun, so I won't go into that.
Another issue to consider: Caitlin Jenner kind of sucks. Most people do not like her. Most TRANS people don't even like her. For one, despite the fact that she's trans, she is a Republican who has made anti-gay marriage comments in the past. The bizarre shittiness of a trans person being like that is a pretty ripe source of material for disses, yet this battle does not bring it up at all. And more notably than that, Caitlin Jenner was famously involved with a manslaughter case, where she was accused of getting someone killed due to negligent driving. It was ultimately determined that there wasn't enough evidence for manslaughter and so she wasn't found guilty(though it's widely believed that this decision was bullshit and she did commit manslaughter), but it's an extremely well-known and controversial factoid and it's insane they didn't have Banner bring up as a diss. If you're going to have a rapper make the case of "Just you being you is enough to diss you", seems like being a trans Republican and quite possibly committing vehicular manslaughter are the two strongest and most obvious points to go with. And yet... nothing. If your goal to make a battle that gives trans people positive representation, I feel like Caitlin Jenner seems like a pretty poor choice. I get that there aren't a lot of choices for a trans rep with name recognition, but... the Wachowski sisters are right there.
Another thing is... why is it a moral imperative that Caitlin win this battle? Sure she's trans, and it's cool want to give trans people positive representation, but you didn't need to give her an absurdly long verse at the end to do that. You could just give her good writing, refrain from shitting on her just for being trans, and let her have the final word. Then, yes, show the pride flag at the end to say Trans Rights. That's all you had to do. With something like Jefferson v. Douglass the scale-tipping made sense, because it was a slave-owner vs. a slave. Yeah, it's kind of hard for the slave-owner to win that match, and it makes sense to use it as a vehicle to take a firm stand against slavery. But it's not like this battle is Trans Person vs. Transphobe; Bruce Banner isn't some horrible person that must be morally condemned(there's a much stronger case for Caitlin herself), so... why have it play out like this? I think that ironically, by trying to hand the match to Caitlin like this they wound up getting more hate thrown towards the performance and more people voting against her in polls than there otherwise would have been if they'd just cut out all that excessive padding and given her a solid closing verse. As-is the verse isn't good, the overall quality is dragged down by just how much fluff there is.
In the end, my read on the situation is this: for whatever reason, they really liked the idea of this matchup and wanted to go through with it. They knew that going through with it would necessitate making it Bruce Banner vs. Bruce Jenner at the start, so they bit the bullet on the deadnaming and the conceit for the matchup and did everything they could to mitigate the potential backlash for that, going as soft on Caitlin as possible and giving her a verse that was ridiculously lengthy. People always say "but it's the Hulk, it makes sense he wouldn't say much!" and sure, I can buy that as an excuse as to why Caitlin's verse would be longER than his, but that still doesn't account for why it's as insanely long as it is. In any case... this paragraph is just speculation, I can't know their actual motivations, but I think this is likely what happened.
Anyway... despite all, this battle gets way too much hate. I think Jenner's first verse is really good, and the Hulk is also quite solid for as few lines as he gets. Bruce Banner is a little mediocre and Caitlin's last verse ends up just being a pain in the ass to sit through(could've been good if they cut all the fat and left in the handful of good lines) that's best skipped past on repeat listens. But still... there's some stuff here that is thoroughly enjoyable. I don't think this battle quite manages to be good, but it's got enough going for it that I think it manages to avoid being outright bad. I'm putting this in the top of C tier, because I genuinely think it's more enjoyable than all of the battles that are below it.
It's understandable to say that The Hulk beat Jenner's second verse, but I think her first verse was pretty fire and the highlight of the battle. I think she edges out a win, but a case could be made either way.
Let me end things off by saying this: I once watched this battle with an extremely transphobic relative, and he was pissed off by that "no gender issue, this Jenner issue" line. So even if this battle was a regrettable mistake, at least they did something right.

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/ThrowRA999333
Originally posted to TrueOffMyChest
I(29F) made my step-father(50M) an outsider at my wedding that he paid for. I need to make it up to him but I dont know how.
Thanks to u/queenlegolas and u/Direct-Caterpillar77 for suggesting this BoRU
Trigger Warnings: child abandonment, emotional manipulation, possible exploitation
Original Post: May 6, 2024
I ruined the memory of the best day of my life because I was too blind to see what I was doing was hurting one of the most important people in my life. I got married 2 months ago to the love of my life, and he finally opened my eyes to what I did. He showed me the perspective I didnt understand.
When I was 5 my father left us. Just disappeared without trace. He and my mom were already separated by that point, but he was still living with us. 3 years later my mom started dating Rob. He was quite a bit younger than she was, I belive she was 34 and he was 26. Today he is very wealthy (he wasnt when he met my mom) and he treats my mother like a queen. Whenever she is around him she looks like the happiest person in the world. My younger sister looks a lot like me and mom, but her personality is for sure a reflexion of her dad, always telling jokes and being just a nice person all around while me and my mom are more serious and cold.
As I got older, Rob became more present in my life he got married to my mom and she got pregnant. But it was still pretty weird seeing him as a father figure mostly because people would asume he was my brother all the time. When I was in HS, I was dating this boy, and he broke up with me at my friends house. My mom was on a night shift and I had to ask Rob to pick me up. When he did, he conforted me, took me to get ice cream, and when we got home he told me something like this (without knowing what happened) "whoever made you sad doesnt understand that you are the best girl in the world, and its their loss. Dont beat yourself up because other people are too stupid to see it"
I just said to him "I wish you were my dad". He smiled and said that he wished that too, and he could be if I wanted to. We left it at that. I never called him dad. But from that point foward I saw him as a father and I think he knows it.
I finally reconected to my biological father about an year ago. It happened because I got engaged. When I came to my mom's house one day, he was there and I couldnt even recongnise him. He was way thiner than he was when I was a kid. He struggled for years with depression and substance abuse. My mom and Rob actually helped him get clean and they even paid for his stay at a great reabilitation center. They decided together that it was time for me to finally meet him again.
I dont want to explore much on how this was, but all I have to say is that im glad to have him back in my life and im glad for being able to help him heal. He sufered a lot, he got lost. But now he is at least trying.
Rob and my mother payed for everything at my wedding, and everything was amaizing. The church was beautiful, my husband looked amaizing. The one mistake I made: I chose my biological father over Rob. I chose the man that did abandon me for over 20 years over the one the took me as his own and gave me everything he could when he didnt have to. I chose the man that broke my mothers heart over the one that saved her. I dont know why I did what I did. Looking back on it I feel so fucking stupid. My dad didnt deserve to walk me down the aisle. My dad dint deserve to be in all the pictures with my mom and my husbands parents. It should have been Rob.
I dont know, I think I was compensating for the time lost with my dad. Everything was still so fresh with him. I was helping him out, he talked to me everyday, I felt like he deserved to be back in my life.
When we were deciding who would give speeches, we had to cut some because it was just too many and me and my husband didnt really like the idea of hearing speeches for and hour and a half. So we decided for 5 people each. When I gave the list to my husband he even asked "no Rob?" And I said "yeah, my mom is already doing one". The others I chose were 2 of my bridesmaids, my mom, my sister (she really pushed for it) and, again, my dad. My husband said I should reconsider, He even thought of giving up one of his to put Rob in. I said it was fine, he didnt need to do that. My whole thinking when doing this was that Rob has my sister. He will have his moment. This was the only chance my dad had.
But I went too far. I completly cut him out of the party basically. If you look at the photos it doesnt even look like he went. My mom looks like she is faking a smile in half the pictures. I dont have a single picture with him. He only apears in group pictures, and some with my husband.
I only realised all of this when I texted Rob 2 days ago, asking him about a gift im giving my husbands for his birthday. He anwsered. Then asked about my car that is with a mecanic friend of his. He awnsered. Then I asked him something about my insurance. He did not anwser. A little over an hour later my mom called me. She just said "do you have no shame? Do you not understand what you did?" I just listend and she told me not to talk to Rob for now. I was just so fucking confused. I got home and told my husband and he just said that he knows what she is referencing but he will talk to her first.
Later, he showed me the wedding photos, he went step by step on everything I have listed here. He talked calmly, and broke it down for me. By the end I was crying so much that I had a headache. What an inconsiderate idiot I am. He told me that he and my mom didnt tell me anything before the party because Rob asked them not to. He understood that it was important for me for my father to be a big part of this day and when they protested he said that they should not make me worry about these small things.
I dont know what changed from before the party to now. My mom only tells me that he needs a bit of time and that he will talk to me soon. My husband keeps telling me that I made a mistake but Rob will be understanding and will forgive me. And I know that he will. He 100% has already forgiven me. He probably felt something when I was texting him that day that broke him down. I dont know what I said to trigger him at that moment, but also it doesnt really matter. I did the real damage at the party probably since he apeared to be fine with everything else before it (It was not fine by any means)
I have to make it up to him. I dont know how but I just do. I guess im just writing this here because im a little lost. Im too ashamed to talk about it with anyone else I know apart from my mom and husband. She doesnt tell me anything and my husband keeps insiting that everything will be fine and for me not to worry too much about it. And he is probably right but I feel like me not worrying about this is just being incosiderate to Rob again. I have to worry. I just dont know what to do.
Im now at work, and the only thing I can think about is this. Nothing else matters to me right now.
If someone has any kind of idea of how I can make it up to him I would greatly appreciate it.
Edit: Literally 40 minutes after I uploaded this, my mom texted me saying that Rob wants to speak to me tonight.
Relevant Comments
OOP on the situation of her insurance and Rob

OOP: Actually, Rob does not pay for my insurance. He only helped me set it up. And this is not about money at all, I make more than enough money and my husband is also very well off. Rob and my mom paid for the wedding because they wanted to. They told me it would be their gift for me and they gave me the money to use it on the wedding. My husbands family gave us a sum to help pay for our new house.
But your comment made me realise that this might be the problem, he might think im using him for money. That just breaks my heart. I do not want his money. I would happly take myself out of the my mom's will and his (if he has me in it, which he probably does), if it means I can fix this.
Also, he was not rich at all when he met my mom. He became successful after their marriage. Just to clarify.

OOP on why she didn’t plan the wedding photos ahead of time

OOP: My plan was that I wanted spontanious pictures and the photographer had to be changed last minute. In my head it worked out fine, what I wanted was to have the "important" pictures taken early, bridesmades, groomsman and family and later on have just spontanious pictures.
It was something I was too stuck on, this notion of "wasting time" doing pictures, speaches, etc.
But that was such dumb thinking. Thats what wedding are for.
At the end of the day though, everything went great apart from this disastrous oversight of mine.

Top Comments
RevolutionaryHat8988: I want to hug Rob. We all need a Rob in our lives.
Deleted Commenter: You’re almost 30 and needed all of this pointed out to you?
You made multiple conscious choices to exclude Rob from your wedding and only cared after you brought up an issue with your insurance: another thing he helped to pay for.
At your age you should know that choices have consequences.
I’m not sure there is anything you can do to make up for the choices you made.
 
Update May 9, 2024
First, I want to say some things before posting:

1. No, I am not Linda, my biological father isnt dying. Got a DM in here asking.
   
2. My sister is mostly just sad, not really mad at me. Just said she understood my situation but it still was really shitty seeing her father taken for granted and sad.
   
3. My mother is the person most pissed off at me at the moment. She is the only one that still does not talk to me. I mean she does, but not really.
   
4. For the people saying my husband and mother were idiots for not talking to me before: they agree and have told me this. My husband specially. Im not trying to shift blame here, just saying this for the people that talked about it
   

I was not going to post anything else on here. Not a fan of being called names and for people to keep saying that Rob should leave our family. Although Im well aware that I deserve most of everything that was said about me. The coments saying "the apple doesnt fall far from the tree" in regaards to me and my biological father were the ones that hurt the most as it is a fear of mine and the reason I dont drink much and dont use any drugs or anything that could be addictive. But seing how there are other things that could make us more similar than I realised is really frightening.
The day I posted here, my mom told me Rob wanted to speak to me and to go to their home after work. I went and waited for Rob to arrive. When he did my mom left us alone and he started off by saying that he was hurt by what I did at the wedding, that he knows he is not my father and that he would never try to force that on me, but that he at least thought he had some sort of importance in my life and seeing me just not give him any importance apart from talking to him when I need help with something made him realise that I do not view him the he thought I did.
At this point I was already crying so much that I couldnt even talk. I waited for him to finish and when he did I just told basically what you all saw in the post. That I fucked up bad, that I was incosiderate, that he is one of the most importante people in my life and that what I did was unforgivable.
The only reason I am posting it here is because of something during the conversation. He said something about my time at college and I went "but that was because..." and stoped. He asked me "what? because of what" I just said "nothing, you are right, that was my fault and I should have done better".
He was pretty angry at that point and he started to smile and we talked about me taking responsibility for my actions. Its something I am terrible at, it was an issue at my old job and since then I have been trying to be better at it but not very successfuly. He asked what changed and I told him about the post. Multiple people in the comments said that I dont take responsibility and yes, they read right through me. I showed it to him and reading the post calmed him down.
And no, he did not read the comments, just the ones I showed it to him, I would not let him see what some of you were saying about my mom.
So yes, he told me if I was going to say something else to thank you people for calling me out for not taking responsibility.
We talked about a lot of other things not related to the wedding. At the end I just told him that there were 2 things I wanted to say for him to take away from this conversation: I really did mean it when I was in HS and said that I wished he was my dad. Even now, with my biological dad in my life. I still feel that way. And the second thing is that I know that it will be hard for him to belive it right now because of what happened, but I will try to prove it to him for as long as it takes.
For those interested, I`ve been going to a therapist with my biological father once every 2 weeks since he came back, but I think I need one for myself so I will try to make it happen soon.
I want to thank 3 particular commenters that helped me.

1. The person that told me to take it slow with Rob and dmed me to stop looking at the thread cause I was spiraling.
   
2. The one that said: "People fuck up. Sometimes badly. But in a loving and caring family it's never the end of things as long as you are willing to own your mistakes."
   
3. And most importantly the best comment that was fair and gave me the right advice: "You are a spoilt, selfish, childish person. I don’t know that rob will forgive you but you can’t simply wait to see if he does. Write him a letter in which you fully own up to your awful behaviour. Do not say “I wish someone had stopped me” - that isn’t taking accountability for the way you treat people. With him and your mom paying for your wedding and your in laws paying for your house - you need to grow up and reflect very seriously on how you interact with everyone around you."
   

I guess the post served as the letter in the scenario, thank you, that was the slap in the face I needed to realise that I need to do a lot of work to improve myself and that the wedding was not its own thing, it was a reflection of who I am right now and I dont like what I see when I look in the mirror. Also, Rob more or less told me something similar, just not as a agressive, so this comment made me take his words as not him atacking me, but trying to help me understand my flaws.
Im not sure how I will make up for this. Rob is telling me that over time, just me being how I was before my biological father showed up will be enough for him. I dont doubt him but its not enough for me. I will live with what I did for the rest of my life. I will always remember.
The way I am now I actually need people to call me out for this kinds of things and its not fair to them. I will work on it, I have to. I will try my hardest to not ever hurt anyone I love this way again. Thankfully now I have someone in my husband to help me do that and call me out if needed. Thank you.
 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

TLDR: My boyfriend just broke up with me out of nowhere and I just want to get over him but I don’t know how
I was with my boyfriend for a year and a half and he ended things with me on Sunday.
At the start things were magical. I was the happiest I’d ever been and I think he was too.
I fell into a deep depression around July last year (whatever you do don’t go on the rod it will ruin your life) and I became a shell of myself. I got really really insecure about a lot of things but especially my relationship. I was terrified he would stop loving me and leave me.
In September I had a massive breakdown and we almost broke up but we decided to stay together. Things did get a bit better in that I started to feel better mentally but I never really felt right.
I would still worry so much about him leaving me. I was so anxious all the time I could barely function.
He spent Christmas with me and my family and then we went away for almost a month in January. I thought things would be getting better.
I just couldn’t shake the insecurity I had though and I started to resent the way he made me feel. I would daydream about breaking up with him just to hurt him or some how getting hurt or sick so he would worry about me.
He wasn’t perfect. I know that. But I did love him. He sometimes wasn’t very nice and would hurt my feelings and make me think that I was just being sensitive.
Things had been quite off since Easter. I was in more of a funk than I had been in quite a while and it felt like my entire life was just so empty and futile.
I didn’t see him a lot during this because this time of year is very busy at his work and I just put everything up to me not feeling great mentally and him being stressed and busy.
My 21st birthday was at the end of April and I was absolutely dreading it.
He took two days off to spend it with me on my birthday and I was so happy to be able to see him and things were so fine and he was the most beautiful Facebook post for me and I remembered why I loved him so much.
My party was on the Saturday of that week and again he came and spent the afternoon with me and looked after me while I was violently hungover on Sunday. We had been talking for so long about moving into together and we had another conversation about it on Sunday. Everything again seemed to be fine.
I started an antidepressant on Monday in an attempt to pull myself together and help control my anxiety. I was pretty sick this first week as I heard can be expected when starting this medication.
The next Saturday he invited me out to a family friend’s bonfire. He was so mean to me this night. He didn’t really talk to me and he didn’t sit near me. I was sort of left to try and talk to his mom.
We got home that night and he laid on his phone before saying goodnight and going to sleep. This was not very usual for us. We would usually cuddle and talk or have sex, just spend time together in bed. I was left feeling so confused and worried. I didn’t know what I had done.
The next day I was understandably a little demure as I continued to worry about what I had done to upset him. And he made a point to keep asking me if I had had a good night. Which I had not. Because of him. I didn’t say this.
I cried the entire hour long drive home. I thought I was just reacting badly to my medication.
The next week I started to feel better with my medication and my spirits started lifting. We still didn’t really text a lot during the day but I was able to recognise that he was probably just busy and he wasn’t going to leave me at the drop of a hat.
On Saturday we had plans to go out with his friends for dinner. He asked me to come over that day, he was going to take the day off the spend with me.
When I got there he was acting so weird again. Being cold and antisocial and quite short with me. I just figured he was stressed or something and he eventually warmed up a little by dinner.
But when we got home the same thing happened again and he completely froze me out and went to sleep immediately. I was so worried I didn’t sleep.
The next morning we had breakfast with his mom and she showed me his baby album. Things were fine.
When I got home I decided to text him and just ask if everything was okay or if I was just imagining things to be a bit off and he responded with no things are not alright I’ll phone you later.
A delightful message to receive.
He then drove all the way to my house and preceded to tell me that he just didn’t care about me when we were apart. He said he wanted to break up with me since SEPTEMBER when we last had this conversation. And he felt like staying with me would be settling.
But he said he still wanted to see me and be friends with me and he didn’t want to lose me. Upon my asking what being friends would look like he explained that we would still do pretty much everything we always have done just not have sex anymore.
He was here for over three hours and probably cried more than I did.
Now i am heartbroken. I can’t believe that I will never see him or his friends and his family every again. I just don’t know what to do with my self. I wasted over a year of my life with him and he said he didn’t love me for almost half of it
But I’m also relieved. I don’t have to worry about him judging me or leaving me. I feel like a weight has been lifted off of my chest. I want to hate him but I can’t. I can see now that our relationship was probably over for a while now or at the very least I haven’t been happy with it for a while but I am still so sad.
I am worried he will want to get back together again but I am also so worried that he won’t. I just don’t know how to stop thinking about it. I want it so bad but I also don’t know if I can do it again.
I miss him so much, he was my person for so long and I just don’t know how to get over it.
I can’t stop thinking about all of the plans we had made all of the this was so looking forward to doing with him.
I just want to get into a new relationship not because I really need one, I have my fried and my family, I feel less alone now than I did with him. But it was so nice having a person. (I do recognise that it is waaaay too early to be thinking about getting into any sort of new relationship)
The thought that I will have to date again kills me too. Boy are so foul and mean and how do you even meet people outside of dating apps.
But I also don’t ever want to have to trust a boy again because it will just end the same way again I’m just not good enough.
Anyway, I’m so sorry for all of that but yeah how do I get over this and stop thinking about him?

So in January, my SO brought up to me that he was unhappy in our relationship because we were arguing too much, and I wasn't making time for him. We have a son with adhd, he takes up my patience and time, I'm a full time student, and an office manager. Still no excuse to make someone feel neglected, so I apologized and prioritized my time, talked to my therapist for aid in stress relief (I knew I was in a bad mood often), and cut back on hours. I told him to keep me up to date in his feelings, and if there is something else I can do to work on my end.
Everything has been going so much better and I asked him if he's happy with me a couple times, to which he responded he was never unhappy with me but with how our relationship was. Making the changes I did and being more present has felt amazing for me and I realized like wow, I have my person and I don't feel as stressed anymore maybe I bit off more than I can chew and this just feels good. I excitedly planned our 10 year anniversary, and we're both beyond excited.
Brings me to my issue, I can't shake this feeling off since January when he told me he was unhappy. I overthink and I know that but I can't get out of my head. I worry I'm not doing enough, looking good enough, having enough sex, etc... so we make jokes about our sex life taking a hit when becoming parents, and I make jokes about myself gaining weight, my stomach being different, etc. But he made a couple jokes a week ago and it hurt. It doesn't feel the way it used to because in my head he's not happy and I wish I could change it all and be someone he's proud to have (I gained 40 lbs since my son and have pcos so losing it has been a nightmare).
Fast forward to last week, I got his phone to look up his cousin (to buy a minisplit from them) on Facebook. I see multiple searches for women on it and it made my heart drop. I trust him, I don't think he'd cheat but it caught me off guard because one them is a spitting image of his dream girl. I put his phone down and just let it be. Before I get scolded on here, I know I shouldn't have looked again as it's an invasion of privacy (even though he has told me years ago, I could look through his phone) I never felt the need to and this was just coincidence. But I did, two more times. The old searches for her were deleted. But he forgot to delete the search from yesterday. Now my thing is why search them so often? And why delete it? And apparently, they went to high school together (says on the fb).
My brother is his best friend since 8th grade (how we met) and I was kinda just made apart of the friend group and they have talked about old crushes/flings in the past and the name of the girl he's been consistently searching up has never came up in these conversations so I'm kind of like who is she? Where did she come from?
I guess another thing that is just so bothersome to me about the whole thing is how I've been trying hard, putting in work to this and he's just doing whatever. But told me when I asked how happy he is now and happy about the changes.
Anyway, any advice would be great. And I guess bottom line is, should I be worried about his consistent searches? Should I ask him about it or let it be? Am I too in my head? I don't know.
TLDR; F28, M31 my SO of 10 years is consistently searching someone up on Facebook after telling me he was unhappy in January but now says he's so happy and loves all that has changed so I'm unsure if to bring it up to him or I'm overreacting and in my head.

1. Dark Water Dark Water is a 2002 Japanese horror film that was adapted into a 2005 American version starring Jennifer Connelly. In both movies, a mother (named Dahlia; the Black Dahlia was found murdered near the Cecil Hotel) and daughter (named Cecilia, which sounds eerily like the Cecil Hotel) move into a new apartment where discolored water starts coming out of the faucets. The weird water and spooky elevator eventually lead them to discovering a dead body in the apartment's water supply. If you boil down the movie to its most basic elements, you get the story of Elisa Lam.

Lam was found in the Cecil Hotel's water tank about a week after the LAPD posted a video of her acting strangely in the elevator. Before her body was found, guests complained about the low water pressure and strange tasting and discolored water. It was almost like life imitated art — people legitimately wondered if someone or some higher power was deliberately playing out the movie's plot.

1. Morbid the Death Metal Musician

Morbid, or Pablo Vergara, is a death metal musician who found himself in the middle of the Elisa Lam case after web sleuths looked into his videos. A year before Lam died, he posted a video about staying at the Cecil Hotel. People started digging up songs on his channel about someone drowning and young women being chased and murdered. Web sleuths thought that he was leaving crumbs to flaunt the fact that he murdered Lam. But by his account in the docuseries, Vergara wasn't in the country when Lam died. However, people flagged his social media handles, and his YouTube, email, and Facebook accounts were eventually terminated.

1. LAM-ELISA test For tuberculosis

After Lam died, a tuberculosis outbreak plagued Los Angeles, especially among the homeless community in Skid Row by the Cecil Hotel. The test for the tuberculosis was literally her name, but backwards: LAM-ELISA, which stood for Lipoarabinomannan (LAM) Enzyme-Linked Immunosorbent Assay (ELISA). Conspiracy theorists immediately speculated that Lam was effectively a biological weapon of sorts. They discovered that she was a student from the University of British Columbia, which has a reputable tuberculosis research center. This particular theory has disturbing eugenic undertones that posits Lam was sent to control the homeless population. According to this theory, Lam died because she either knew too much or planned to expose whoever sent her. But according to her autopsy report, Lam did not exhibit any signs of tuberculosis.

1. The Last Bookstore

The last place where anyone saw Lam was, eerily enough, Los Angeles' The Last Bookstore. But this name wasn't the only strange coincidence. If you look up The Last Bookstore's domain, you'll find a postal code in its registration information: V5G 4S2. Online sleuths put the postal code into Google Maps and found the pinpoint at Lam's burial spot, Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Canada.
LINK

Cigarettes and rebellion have always gone hand-in-hand, and in an age of cigarette packet-sized health warnings, now more than ever, smoking a fag says: 'I do not give a fuck.' But if Brandon Flowers is hoping to strike a seditious pose by sparking up at the start of the interview, it's not going according to plan. The Killers' frontman is on all fours rooting through the junk that carpets the anteroom at the band's rehearsal space. "Has anyone seen my lighter?" he asks, rocking back on his heels. The question hangs in the air while Brandon cocks his head, waiting for an answer like a meerkat listening for a predator. Twenty-five years old and with a delicate bone structure, there's something almost dainty about him. Receiving no response, he returns to his search. "Oh, Jeez," he sighs. "I had it just a minute ago."
It's a scene that emphatically does not suggest a rebel without a cause. The mess isn't helping. The Killers' HQ - an industrial unit sandwiched between a construction supplier and the offices of a housing development just off Dean Martin Drive in West Las Vegas - is ankle-deep in designer clothing. A Dior Homme suit lies crumpled by the door; there's a pile of shoes topped like a sundae by a pair of Marc Jacobs trainers; and anyone wishing to enter the shoebox room the band use as an office must negotiate a mountain of discarded jeans. Many items are identifiable as coming from the wardrobe of Hot Fuss, The Killers' hugely successful 2004 debut album - triple platinum in the UK with two weeks at Number One and five million sold worldwide. Look! There are the shirts, ties and suit jackets they wore when they thrilled Glastonbury 2005 with indie rock anthems Mr Brightside and Somebody Told Me. That was the crowning moment of a two-and-a-half year tour that finally concluded in October of last year. It seems that after playing that final date in Miami, they returned to Vegas and shrugged off their image onto the floor of this bland white box.
Now a fine layer of dust covers the dead clothes. The Killers have no further use for white tuxedos on their second album, Sam's Town. Today, Brandon wears a black polo shirt, black pin-stripe waistcoat, black jeans and black boots. Where there used to be a layer of foundation, there is now a beard - an untrimmed beard at that. Dave Keuning (30, guitar), Mark Stoermer (29, bass) and Ronnie Vannucci (29, drums) all echo Brandon's black ensemble. Ronnie has added Aviator shades and a handlebar moustache for a dash of motorcycle cop, Dave's frizzy bubble of hair gives him a Marc Bolan-ish air, and there's something very teenage about Mark's scuffed Vans.
Short of walking around wearing sandwich boards saying, "Our new record is a bit heavier than the last one," The Killers couldn't hope to communicate that message more effectively. And they have gained some musical girth on Sam's Town. The pop hooks that made Hot Fuss so irresistible survive intact - see the ringing guitar riffs on first single When You Were Young - but there's a newfound punchiness, coupled with an epic sweep. The minor-to-major uplifts on Bones are fabulously dramatic, the coda to Why Do I Keep Counting? thrillingly intense. Comparisons to Bruce Springsteen have been made. If they overstate the case a little, they are at leaset qualitatively accurate. The Killers are back and this time it's serious - they've got the bootlace ties to prove it.
"Hey, it says here that Springsteen's headlining Glastonbury next year," shouts Ronnie, who's flicking through the NME. He nods sagely at the page without looking up.
"Really?" asks Dave, nicknamed Crazy Dave on account of his alledgedly volatile nature.
"The Boss is headlining one night, we're playing second on the bill the next night and Kylie's headlining the Sunday," says Brandon, charging like a bull through Michael Eavis' as-yet-unannounced line-up with what subsequently proves to be a characteristic gaucheness.
But that lighter is proving elusive. This being America, none of the people hurrying to-and-fro prepping the world for the release of Sam's Town smokes. Manager Robert Reynolds - Bobby Rey to the band - barks into his mobile, booking his band onto eye-wateringly demanding tours. "We're going to make a lot of money," he cackles to himself before switching calls to make a series of stern pronouncements on legal matters. Dave, Mark and Ronnie disappear for a jam session. Artwork is approved, B-sides are decided on and schedules are hammered out.
"I can't find it," Brandon says, finally. But he's not going to be denied the opportunity to underline The Killers reinvention with a puff of smoke. "Let's go to the gas station. I'll have to buy one. It's too busy to talk here anyway."
+
Brandon's black (of course) Volkswagen Touraeg four-wheel drive is barrelling down West Flamingo Road into town. "I was a bell boy there," he says, pointing out of the driver's window at the stucco facade of the Gold Coast casino. "I was working there when we were signed."
Coming from Las Vegas, it is perhaps inevitable that casinos play a big part in The Killers' story; not only is Sam's Town named after one, it was recorded in one, too.
The band began writing songs while on the road with Hot Fuss, turning up early for soundchecks to run through new ideas. On a trip home to Vegas, George Maloof, a hotelier known for cultivating famous friends, invited them to record the album in the new studio he'd built at The Palms, his flagship hotel-cum-gambling den. When the tour finished in October 2005, they returned to Vegas and spent five month finessing the songs they'd sketched out on the road. Then, in February, they decampled to the third floor studio at The Palms and recorded Sam's Town over 11 weeks.
Producer Flood (U2, Depeche Mode) encouraged them to experiment. They overdubbed, fiddled with synthesizers and played with new equipment. It took them five weeks to get the backing vocals right. The band sang the harmonies, then double-tracked them four times. The end result recalls Queen wondering, "Is this is the real life? Is this just fantasy?" When Ronnie, a trained classical percussionist, brought some kettledrums down, eyebrows were raised; but the fabulously bombastic coda on Why Do I Keep Counting? vindicates his indulgence.
"That's kind of the Ben Hur of the album," he says. He's not wrong. Sam's Town is a record on an epic scale. "Yeah, it has drama," he continues. "But, at the same time, I think it's a little more exposed than Hot Fuss. It's a little more naked. Last time it was about a lot of fictional things." By "fictional", Ronnie means that Hot Fuss wore its predominantly British influences for all to see. Brandon's taste in music is rabidly Anglophile - he constantly references The Smiths, The Cure and Joy Division - and it showed. By contrast, Sam's Town is an unequivocally American record. The lyrical imagery is pure American dream - cars, girls, wide-open spaces and escaping to a better life. "We're burning down the highway skyline/On the back of a hurricane that started turning/When you were young," sings Brandon on When You Were Young. That's the basis of the Springsteen comparisons then, though the lack of pathos more closely recalls another blue-collar rocker from New Jersey - Jon Bon Jovi.
The phrase "this town" recurs throughout the album, and it's always receding into the distance as The Killers escape to a new life. "This town was made for passing through/I never did get along with everybody else," sings Brandon on This River Is Wild. On Read My Mind he "never really gave up on breaking out of this two-star town", while on the title track he offers something of an explanation: "Nobody ever had a dream round here."
"With the first record, there was this feeling that there was this world out there that we didn't know," says Mark later in the day. Before The Killers, he studied philosophy: now he's their quiet one. "We wanted to get out and away from this and be somewhere else. We hadn't had a lot of experience - hadn't travelled much - then we were gone for three years. We didn't sit down and say that we wanted to make a record about how we're glad to be home, but that's what happened naturally."
It's not an angsty record. The Killers have already escaped with Hot Fuss, and, having done so, they view the experience fondly now they're back. There's a mistiness to Brandon's eyes as he explains how the album got it's name.
"Sam's Town is a casino on the edge of Vegas," he says. "I grew up in Henderson, which is out on the way to the Hoover Dam. My mom and dad lived in a trailer park, and my dad used to hitchhike up and down Boulder Highway, which is the only way you could get to Vegas. Sam's Town was the first thing you saw on your way in to town. So, when you're driving down Boulder Highway from Henderson, I always thought you finally knew you were getting somewhere when you saw Sam's Town. It was kind of like a beacon."
"It's not a completely American album," contines Brandon. "We still have our English influence, but we're also from the Wild West. Somehow we've managed to unify all that on this album. it's just such a perfect resemblence of what we are."
At the petrol station, Brandon rummages through the glove box looking for change to buy a lighter. "This is a great album," he says, pointing at Highway Companion, the latest from iconic American rocker Tom Petty. "I've always been a big fan of his. He's such a great American artist."
Yes, Brandon: we get the point.
+
When Brandon finally lights his cigarette, he smokes it awkwardly, like a child mimicking something he's seen the grown-ups doing. However, when he cheerfully admits that, "I feel the same mentally as I did when I was 12," it's not a knowing nod to the fact that he sometimes behaves like a loveably precocious child, but a reference to an unusually comprehensive grounding in pop music at an early age.
When Brandon sings about "this town", he doesn't mean Las Vegas. He means Nephi, Utah or Henderson, Nevada, where he spent his childhood. His parents are Mormon and he is the youngest of six children. "I was a surprise," he says. "I've got a 42-year-old sister." If he was issues about his "surprise" status, he chooses to gloss over them. "It turned out perfect because my brother was a teenager when I was a kid," he says. "He would bring home things like Rattle And Hum by U2 and I would watch it. I remember he bought Live In Dallas by Morrissey. It was always him watching these things, or his door was shut and you'd hear The Head On The Door by The Cure blasting through the house and rattling the walls."
The Killers were formed when Brandon answered an advert Dave had placed in a local paper in late 2002. Dave cited Oasis as a big influence; Brandon had seen them play recently and responded; and, as Dave has said in previous interviews: "He was the only person to reply to my ad who wasn't a complete freak." However, the band was born in Brandon's brothers bedroom.
"His room was like a shrine," enthuses Brandon. "It was a holy place. I wish I could show you a picture of it. It was covered in posters. There'd be a big picture of Elvis wearing a bow tie that just said 'The Smiths' [the artwork for The Smiths 1987 single Shoplifters Of The World Unite]. You had The Cure wearing face paint [the artwork to The Cure's 1985 single In Between Days] - all that kind of stuff. I remember Morrissey being on the cover of the NME, with the halo [from 1985] - stuff like that. You just wanted to know about these people 'cause they were so cool. My brother seemed like such a cool person. But he was a teenager, so he wasn't going to be that nice to me, a kid."
Brandon was fascinated by his brother's collection of music, magazines and posters, but he was denied access to them - officially, at least. "I would sneak in," he says. "I knew he'd be angry if he found out, but I would go in as soon as he left the house." For a long time Brandon was too scared to actually play anything. "That didn't come 'til later. I just used to go in there because I liked it. Then I got to the point where I'd actually take a tape out and put it in. It took more guts to do that."
It was a life-changing moment. "I was ten and the first song I played was Sing Your Life by Morrissey. I remember dancing about to it."
The lyrics to Sing Your Life include the lines, "Sing your life/Just walk right up to the microphone/And name all the things that you love/All the things that you loathe." It's intriguing to wonder what Morrissey makes of the neophyte he inspired with these lines.
Eventually, Brandon inherited his brother's tape collection. "It was around the same time CDs started coming out in a big way. He started buying CDs and gave me his tapes. And that was it: it took off from there. I got a hundred of the best albums - all the New Order, all the Morrissey, all The Smiths, The Beatles. I started buying posters. I went to see The Cure in concert. It was just kind of a continuation of my brother. And it was nice because, though my parents were strict, they were already used to it from him. There was no, 'My dad doesn't understand me,' or any of that kind of stuff. My mum likes The Smiths."
Brandon was 13 and his favourite band was late-'70s/early-'80s American new wavers The Cars, and particularly their jaw-droppingly catchy 1979 single Just What I Needed.
"I wouldn't exist without that song," he says. "That was the one. I remember driving around with my mum when I was 13, and we're living in Nephi - a really small town - and I felt so cool when I put that song on. Like: 'I have something that none of these kids I'm going to middle school with tomorrow have.' That excitement is what music's about, isn't it? That's why I understand the mentality of people that don't like us because we've sold so many records. I used to like it when no one else knew about a band. So I get that - I do."
+
Brandon's first band was called Blush Response. It was never going to work out. Not because he refused to move to Los Angeles with them, but because he is utterly - comically - shameless. He's given to making outrageously boastful statements like: "It's not like the '60s, '70s and '80s now. There are only a few bands around that are really good, that just do it. I mean, there's what, five or six of us?"
For the record, in Brandon's estimation, those bands are Franz Ferdinand, Razorlight, The Strokes, The White Stripes, Yeah Yeah Yeahs and, of course, The Killers.
"I don't want people to think I'm lumping myself with other people just to make us sound cool," he says. Really? It sort of sounds like you are. But he just steamrolls through it. "Yeah, but you know what I mean," he says, grinning at his own cheekiness. He's so disgracefully forward you can't help but laugh along with him - Oh you are awful, Brandon! But joking aside, The Killers are the most commercially successful of all the bands he mentions.
Later, back at the rehearsal space, the band run through Sam's Town at deafening volume in preparation for the forthcoming tour - first the US, then the world. The infectious, almost contagious, chorus of When You Were Young sounds fabulous, as do the U2-like guitars and Twin Peaks synths of Read My Mind. Meanwhile, Smile Like You Mean It and Somebody Told Me benefit from the newfound harder edge.
They somewhat heavy-handedly underline the new direction by playing Paranoid by Black Sabbath and Get It On by T Rex. That's the thing: The Killers are not a subtle band. Their songs are like a wet kiss from a girl who's a bit too drunk. They are big and brash, and not everyone loves them for it. Mr Brightside and Somebody Told Me might go down as well at hip nightclubs as they do on the festival circuit, but the DJs play them with the same guilty look they wear when playing a pop record.
"I hate that," says Brandon. "Like writing a song you can hum somehow cheapens it? It makes me think of this quote by Morrissey. Everybody knows how he read Oscar Wilde, Keats and Yates when he was growing up and that he wanted to be a writer. He was talking to this journalist who asked why he hadn't become a writer, and Morrissey said: 'What I do is more powerful than what you do because I can write down these words and you get it to a melody. How can you beat that?' I'm of the same opinion. I don't understand why a good melody that's memorable is a bad thing."
Being dismissed as pop particular aggrieves Ronnie. "When we first came out we got compared to Duran Duran all the time. Jesus Christ! We got a keyboard player now all of a sudden he's Nick Rhodes! Come on!"
"The people who criticise us for being too poppy don't get it," agrees Mark. "I think that's the problem with a lot of rock music. People are afraid to write a song any more. Either that or they can't. And that attitude hurts music in general. The best bands ever have all written great songs. You can still do it and do it intelligently and it can be original. This isn't a studio creation with a producer writing these songs for us. We're not Avril Lavigne, or something like that. We're a real band writing real songs, just like a punk band would do, except that we write pop songs."
You get the impression that The Killers knack for showboating pop hooks that border on vulgar is inextricably tied up with the brazen side of Brandon's personality. But while his ebullient charisma, not to mention the songs themselves, mitigates his outrageousness, there is a less attractive side to his ego. He has a combative streak. He can't resist taking pot shots at emo bands, notably Fall Out Boy, whith whom The Killers share an A&R man.
Has he heard how many emo kids it takes to change a light bulb? "No." None. They just sit in the dark and cry. It's a full 30 seconds before he stops laughing. When he does he admits: "Yeah, we've had problems with other bands. You know, when you walk in the room it's like..." He whistles the theme to The Good, The Bad And The Ugly. "We're like gangs."
And while the other members of the band are diplomatic on the subject of Brandon, you don't have to read too deeply between the lines to conclude that there have been internal issues, too.
"Some people will think Brandon's the big genius," says Dave, visibly bridling. "There are songs, such as Why Do I Keep Counting?, where he's written every note. But there are others, like When You Were Young, that were more of a collaboration - like Mr Brightside, where I had some of the music and Brandon came up with the lyrics. We always have arguments about who wrote what. The truth is that we all help in that process."
When asked how success affected them, Ronnie says: "There were certain things that needed adjusting. When you're on tour for two years, people can get a little needy. It doesn't help that you're surrounded by yes men and everybody's working for you. At times we've had to say, 'Who do you think you are?' to people. No one wears the trousers, but some people would like to. I think if it wasn't for the people in the band kicking each other in the ass... Let's just say there was some ass-kickin'."
It doesn't take a genius to work out whose ass needed kicking most often.
+
It's the following day and The Killers are back at their rehearsal space. The topic of discussion is what to wear in the video for Bones, the second single. It's a big deal: the director is Tim Burton. "I feel like Frank Sinatra when I sing it," announces Brandon. "With maybe a little bit of Morrissey and a little bit of Elvis, too."
Of course he does. But if securing the services of Tim Burton tells you one thing, it's that The Killers are about to get even bigger, perhaps even make the leap to the same level as Coldplay et al. Already stars, they are about to become superstars. Brandon can hardly wait.
"Do you know that Rolling Stone didn't want to put us on the cover last time," he says indignantly. "They didn't think we were stars. We sold five million albums! What more do they want from a band?"
Whatever was required, Brandon would be happy to do most things. "I'll do stuff that some people don't want to do, 'cause I want people to hear the music," he says. However, even he has limits. "The Rolling Stone thing made the record label think: 'What can we do to make them stars?' If I go on vacation with my wife, do they have to send somebody to be there to take pictures of me? Is that how you become a star? I don't want that. I walked down the red carpet one time and I realised I don't like it. But you don't have to walk down the red carpet for people to hear your music. We do still have some of that indie blood running through our veins."
He heads off at a tangent: "When you walk around Liverpool, you think of The Beatles, or you go to Manchester and you think of The Smiths or Oasis. I want you to come to Las Vegas and think of Sam's Town. And I think we've started to capture that, which is a truer version of The Killers, 'cause that's where we're from."
He pauses.
"I used to live across the street from Sam's Town. Maybe it'll be like our Abbey Road where people go to take pictures."
Is that what he'd like?
"I wouldn't mind it," he says, desperately hoping it will come true.
He puts a cigarette between his lips, looks down at his trouser pockets and pats them in search of the lighter he bought yesterday.
"Hey, I don't suppose you've got one?"

So one post office passport said they needed a document like the marriage or divorce decree whatever is last.
But that office couldn’t take us in so we went another day to another office.
This office didn’t let us even put the marriage or divorce thing in just in case.
For example, birth certificate says “Sue Johnson”
And drivers license says “Sue Smith”
And all the lady let us put in was the birth certificate and then she photo copied the drivers license.
Will this work for getting a passport?

I 22F have been living with my parents up to recently. For some background, I lived with them because I have disorders and a disability so they wanted me closer. Anyway, I started dating a guy from another state. I moved there and ended up wanting to come home, so in the end he moved in with me. My parents were fine with him it seemed, as time passed they started not to like him. He got kicked out, there were arguments and I broke up with him due to the drama. We ended up getting back together secretly because my parents would freak out, they found out and went off on me. I got kicked out into the cabin on the property. I explained that I knew they would be mad because they don’t like him and it was a whole thing. My boyfriend and I were called names, lots of rude things were said to me. Fast forward to now, I told my mom I’m going for a week to hangout with my friend, I’ve been friends with for 11-12 years. I really was gonna be with my boyfriend for that week, my friend was picking me up. Now I know it was wrong, but she freaks out when she knows I’m with him. She almost instantly texts me and starts to blow up my phone. For the duration of the stay so far she’s blown up my phone, kicked me out, told me I’m a disappointment, said terrible things to me, told me she’s rehoming my dog, and blocked me on messages/facebook. When she was going off on me she told several people what’s happening or more like her side only like usual. Those people started texting and blowing up my phone. I didn’t feel like that happening more so I unfriended a lot of people and blocked one that was blowing up my phone. I know I shouldn’t have lied but I think she went too far. Now I’m moving back in with my boyfriend. I have a time to get my stuff before they get rid of it, which I’m going to do. I see I was wrong, I just don’t think I was wrong to where that’s a valid thing to do. Everyone I told is shocked, I mean I get it too. I would never do that to anyone especially if I had kids.

DC Next presents:

I AM BATMAN

In True Crime
Issue Sixteen: Dark Hair And Face Paint
Written by ClaraEclair
Edited by PredaPlant & DeadIslandMan1
 
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Gotham University’s winter term was coming to an end, and that meant the resident varsity football team was finishing out their season — on home turf, no less. The Nighthawks were on a winning streak and were looking to finish off the season with a championship. The entire team felt the energy coursing through them as the stadium filled and crowd chants grew.
There were always major league scouts within the crowds at these types of games, especially for teams as impressive as the Nighthawks had been. There was no doubt in anyone’s mind that some of the players on the varsity team would be making it to the national league. The coach, as hard as he could be on his team, felt nothing but warm pride in his heart and mind.
Zack Howard, the captain of the Nighthawks, looked over the 120 yard field from the player entrance, listening to the roaring crowd chanting for the Nighthawks — even fans of the Princeton Tigers felt the pull toward cheering on the Gotham University team. Just as much as his coach, he felt pride in being able to carry his team this far. He hoped to give the best game he’d ever played, to be noticed by big league coaches and scouts.
“Zack!” He heard his coach shout from behind him, no doubt trying to shift his attention back to the locker room and preparations for the game ahead. Zack exhaled deeply and turned around to see Coach Fremlin approaching with a light jog, holding something in his hand. “Delivery for ya,” he said, handing the envelope to the captain. “Some girl said to give it to you, said there’s somethin’ special inside.” With a smirk, Fremlin clapped Zack’s shoulder before turning back toward the locker room.
Zack’s mind flooded with possibilities and fantasies about what could’ve been in the envelope. Something special could have been anything, and it excited him as he ripped it open. His expression quickly shifted, however, as he pulled a handwritten note out of the envelope, scribbled in nearly illegible handwriting.
”Zack Howard,” it read. He opened it, his brow furrowed, and watched as an instant print photograph fell out of the fold and onto the ground. One piece of clear tape had been shoddily applied to the corner and had clearly lost its adhesion. Leaning down, Zack picked up the photo and squinted, trying to make out the subject.
It took a few moments, but the longer he stared at the photo, the more it dawned on him what was depicted in it. Instantly, upon realising what he saw, he rushed back to the locker room and forced himself through his teammates to Coach Fremlin, who was dragging out his playbook. He grabbed the coach by the shoulder, twisted him around to face him directly, and planted the photo firmly on his chest.
“What the fuck is this?” he demanded. Confused, Fremlin chuckled nervously as he tried to grasp the small photo on his chest, not able to see the subject but only the fury in Zack’s face. The room fell totally silent as the entire team watched the coach and their captain with bated breaths.
“What do you mean?” asked Fremlin, turning the image over and squinting at it, trying to make out the details. Just as fast as Zack had initially made out the details, Fremlin’s face dropped at the realisation. “Holy God, Zack, I–”
“What the hell is this?!” Zack demanded once more, resisting the urge to grab his coach by the collar and push him against the wall. “Who gave this to you?”
“I– I don’t know, it was some girl,” Fremlin stuttered, fumbling over himself. “She was short, had black hair, face paint…”
“What’s it say on the back?” asked Tim Teslow, the team’s best running back, pointing toward the image and the messy scrawls on the back of it. Zack snapped it back out of Fremlin’s hands as the coach sat down, head in his hands.
“Section 204, Row 8, seat 9,” Zack read the note aloud. “I’m going to go see what this is,” he said through clenched teeth.
“Dude, that’s across the stadium,” said Cutter Karznowski, the wide receiver that had only joined at the start of the season. “The game’s starting in a few minutes.”
“I don’t care,” Zack snapped back. “I’m going.”
 
 
Good evening, Gothamites, I hope you enjoyed that last one — Barcode by Self-Sacrificial. It’s always been a personal favourite of mine, straight to the point with the best beats and deepest riffs.
In the same spirit, I’ll get straight to the point of why today’s a big day for me — you’ve all known this was coming but I never quite said what it was. When I started this show a little over a year ago, I wanted to look at the dirt of the world. I wanted to bring you my favourite music while trying to figure out my favourite events in this city.
I’ve talked about all the legends, I’ve talked about Joker, Mister Freeze, and so many others. I’ve talked about new shooters like Man-Bat and Professor Pyg. I’ve even, unfortunately, shed some light on the unoriginal copycat hacks that have started popping up in recent years. It’s all been out of love, though. Love for the mind of those who would commit these atrocities, appreciation for what they are and what they represent.
There’s a reason why they are what they are, and it’s always been a goal of mine to love and appreciate what they put into the world. It’s all about the chaos.
But, today, I won’t be talking about that. Today, I’ll be talking about football. Before you all start booing me, it’s my special day and it’s my show, so I get final say. Specifically, it’s the big championship game for the Gotham University Nighthawks. I went to school with these guys, I feel… an obligation.
I’m excited to see how the game will turn out. I get the nagging feeling that their winning streak might come to an end.
 
 
Section 204 in the Gotham Knights stadium, on the north side of Tricorner Island, the southernmost landmass of Gotham, was filled to the brim with spectators and fans. All were cheering as they waited and watched the Gotham University Nighthawks enter the field below, while Zack spent his time searching the section for a small woman with black hair and face paint.
Despite the difficulty of sifting through the crowded seats, he couldn’t find a woman matching that description. He looked back down at the photograph’s note and read it again, making sure he was in the right spot. The location remained the same: Section 204, row 8, seat 9.
People called out his name, but he was quick to shrug them off. He was too focused on finding the woman who’d sent him the photograph. Even asking those who’d been sitting within section 204 had proved fruitless, with no one being able to say anything about the described woman.
Angry and dejected, Zack turned back toward the steps between sections to head back down to the field when something caught his eye as he moved.
“Sir!” He called out, angling his head toward a man two rows above him, pointing beneath his seat. “Sir, what’s that under your seat?” There was some sort of flashing light taped to the bottom of the seat, slowly pulsing between purple and green.
The man looked confused, leaning forward to take a look at what Zack had pointed at, eyes widening the moment he saw the wiring that he sat atop. A complex series of wires and lights traced their way around each seat in the section, though neither he nor Zack could see what, exactly, the wires were attached to.
“I don’t–”
The man could only shout out those few words before a loud explosion rocked the stadium, blasts running down the portion of the stadium from rows 12 to 4. Dozens of seats were annihilated as smoke, fire, and green gas erupted. Cries of pain and fear replaced the cheers of the spectators.
Blood tainted the intact seats while the smoke rose into the air, infiltrating the sky of southern Gotham, visible from all along the city’s coast. What fell across the stadium, permeating nearly every seat on the west side of the stadium, making its way into the halls that traced the inner workings of the building, was a thick green gas, forcing its way into the lungs of the men and women who were running for their lives, trampling each other.
Those closest to the explosion felt intense convulsions in their abdomens and spasms in their faces, involuntarily forced to bear wicked grins while their shattering breaths overtook the screams of terror in the form of wicked laughter.
Amidst the chaos, the charred photo that Zack once held fell slowly and gracefully, slightly charred, ignorant of the horror that it had been subject to. Slightly charred, it landed a few sections away from the explosions, trampled upon by infected spectators who had no idea what was being done to them.
 
 
A Few Minutes Earlier…
James Gordon’s office at the Gotham City Police Department headquarters was quiet as he sat at his desk, resting his elbows on its surface with his hands clasped, opposite Astrid Arkham, the frail-seeming daughter of Jeremiah Arkham. She had requested a meeting with him, and he had assumed it was for an update into Batman’s investigation into her father.
“Gotham City needs something new,” she began, catching him by surprise. His eyes widened slightly, then his brow furrowed. “We’ve been in this… this state of insanity for decades now, and it is only getting worse. This city is no longer livable, Commissioner.” He resisted the urge to groan. The only difference in Gotham City as it was and the Gotham City of before was that the murders had become spectacle.
When supervillains pushed out mobsters and gangsters, there was a shift in crime, but the results remained the same. Salvatore Maroni and Carmine Falcone knew how to keep their business quiet to the public unless they were in active war. Those were the good old days, now.
“Insane, maniacal supervillains,” she continued. “They rule the streets whenever they so choose. The police cannot deal with them, not under you. You rely on the Batman,” there was venom in her voice as she spoke the name, “and she sweeps up the problems while bringing deranged cultists and assassins into this city. She’s the heir of a small personal army with untold technology and she runs free. The Joker Riots, the assassin siege, Simon Hurt, all because the Batman has infested this town with these misguided thoughts of the supernatural, supposedly haunting our city.” Gordon remained silent.
“Essen’s incentives are now failing,” she said, watching Gordon closely for a reaction. If he gave one, she couldn’t see it. “How many companies that were enticed by her incentives have moved headquarters out of Gotham? They pay nothing in taxes, they have Essen licking their boots, and it’s still not enough. Despite all that’s happened, we haven’t been through hell yet, Commissioner. We’ve only arrived at the gates.”
“If I may, Miss Arkham,” said Gordon, leaning back in his chair, scanning the young woman up and down. “What’s your point?” He understood what she was saying, and he feared she was right, but he didn’t like the conclusion she was bringing forth.
“You are antiquated, Commissioner,” she replied, her face straight. “Obsolete. Your methods don’t work anymore, the law you uphold is no longer effective. Besides that, you are getting old. I can see the fatigue in your face, the bags under your eyes, your paleness. You’re not the detective you used to be.” Astrid leaned forward in her seat, putting her weight on her cane. “Gotham needs something new.”
Gordon’s phone rang, and for a brief moment he was thankful for the reprieve — but only for a moment.
 
 
I’d say I feel bad for the people at the Nighthawks game, but, if I’m totally honest, they had it coming. It’s about time everything caught up to them.
While we all ruminate on what’s happening at the game right now, let’s listen to some good music. This is Confetti by Viscera.
 
 
Batman had listened to as many notes as she could about a green gas that made anyone who inhaled it laugh uncontrollably. It typically led to suffocation through the inability to control the diaphragm, but this time it didn’t, and it confused the Dark Knight. A familiar sight, an attack that resulted in eery laughter, and yet it wasn’t what the city had seen before. None of the victims that hadn’t been in the initial blast had died, though medical care for each of them was necessary.
As much as she cursed herself for being late, not able to save anyone as the events unfolded, she knew that she needed to take control as fast as possible. She, along with every person in the city, dreaded what this attack meant. The name of a particular clown lingered on everyone’s tongues, though no one dared invoke his name.
Batman wasn’t so sure, and she hoped that her gut feeling was right. Most of the bodies that were recoverable had been extracted from the blast zone, over a dozen dead and dozens more injured. Blood and soot equally covered the destroyed seats, and even more on the concrete below.
One thing caught Batman’s eye amidst the mess, two sections away from the initial blast. A small instant print photograph, half burnt, laid on the ground, covered in dirty boot prints. She picked it up and looked it over, squinting as she studied the subject.
It was a blonde woman, head down with wet hair covering her face. Almost lost in the details was a small trail of blood behind the hair, mixing with trailing makeup. Batman frowned as she flipped the image over, seeing the note for a specific seat in the section of the stadium that had been blown to bits.
She approached the seat and kneeled, ducking down to see under the seat. It was one of few that remained intact after the explosions. Zack Howard’s Final Stop was scratched into the bottom of the seat, and at the sight of it, Batman signalled to Oracle to scan the engraving. She couldn’t identify the woman in the photograph, but she could see clearly enough that the attack was targeted at a specific person.
Another killer, she thought to herself, fearing what it could mean for the city. Pyg almost tore the richest members of the city’s economy apart, and they were ready to throw their own to the wolves. Now, there’d been a deadly gas attack at a football game — one that had been sponsored by many of Gotham’s elite.
The idea that the Clown Prince of Crime had returned was already making its way through the city — Batman knew she would have to exert control over everything she could to keep it from tearing itself apart at the seams. She was more than prepared to do so.
“It doesn’t look good,” she said to Oracle.
“Yeah,” she said, her voice distant. “I hope it’s just another copycat, they’re much easier to deal with.”
“I don’t know,” Batman replied, looking back at the photograph. “Something’s different.”

I was a homeschooled only child, raised in a QAnon/conspiracy theorist household. It was just a recipe for disaster, and I’ve slowly been trying to put the pieces together to figure things out.
I kind of thought things were going okay, but covid is what really made my world crumble. Out of everything, I think watching my parents turn into doomsday anti-vaxxers was the most devastating thing I’ve ever endured. I had to hide my covid vaccinations from them because my mom threatened to disown me if I “took the mark of the beast.” My dad thinks it’ll turn people into government controlled zombies. I have no other family, and honestly no strong friendships because I was isolated my entire childhood.
I grew up a huge fan of contemporary Christian music, and having so many of my favorite artists spiral into similar ideologies as my parents made me feel so alone. I won’t name anyone directly, but several have said or posted hurtful things regarding LGBTQ rights, and people like me who still choose to mask up out of caution for covid. One artist I especially loved changed the lyrics and made a mockery of Amazing Grace when I saw him in concert in 2022. He said “since we were in good old Florida, he knew he could get away with it.”
(Trigger warning honestly if you don’t want the song ruined for you)
He sang “My mask is gone, I’ve been set free” and a bunch of other altered verses making fun of anyone who still cared about the pandemic. I felt excruciatingly uncomfortable sitting there in the first couple of rows, the only person in the crowd in a mask. The same artist has also posted stuff endorsing toxic purity culture and also anti-trans things.
He’s not the only one. I’ve really started having a tough time separating the artists from the music. I know of a couple who’ve posted some more inclusive things which is nice, but overall the CCM industry has really been giving me the ick lately. Not only that, but my old church as well.
I stopped attending church shortly before 2020. I’m honestly thankful for that because several of my old “Bible study” friends have become versions of themselves I hardly recognize. Maybe I was just oblivious to it at the less politically charged time, but gosh. I moved away so I haven’t seen them in about 5 years, but I’m still friends with them on Facebook and it’s insane how many seem to have become QAnon/conspiracy theorists like my parents. They were normal in high school, at least I thought they were, so what happened?
I’ve thought about looking for a new church, but I’m not sure if I’m ready yet. I used to pray and worship and read scripture all the time, but now I’m ashamed to say it all feels like a chore. I’m terrified of losing my relationship with God, but I don’t feel authentic in my faith like I used to. Because I’ve been hurt by the people who used to encourage me in my faith, that pain has radiated its way into who I am today: someone who doesn’t know how to feel like myself, because I don’t even know who she is anymore.
I cringe listening to my old favorite worship songs. I want to feel that love for my faith again, but I can’t stop associating it with the insanity I’ve been subjected to.
As a teenager I pledged to “save my first kiss for my wedding day,” and that was something I was honestly happy with, until last year when I realized how absolutely deranged that concept was. Sure, don’t even kiss a man until you’ve signed a lifetime contract promising to never leave him for any reason whatsoever. Oh yeah, and while you’re at it make sure you’re submissive to him in everything because he’s “the head of the household.”
I’m now 27 and still have never had a boyfriend, still haven’t kissed anyone. I’ve been on dates with 5 men, and didn’t make it past a second date with any of them. The first one, I was 21 years old. He was from my Bible study, the one I mentioned earlier. He asked me for nudes after our one and only date and wouldn’t stop pressuring me to send them, even after I told him about my then-delusion of no kissing til marriage. I never gave him any thankfully.
I also didn’t go on another date with anyone until I was 25. I had ONE date to my name at the age of 25, because the one time I trusted a “nice boy from church,” he pulled that stunt and I was revolted.
The second guy I went out with, he was really nice but I just didn’t have feelings for him, which made me guilty for some reason. I don’t think I was ever taught growing up that it’s important to feel a connection with a guy, you’re just expected to take what you can get. We only had that one date. The third guy just wanted a hook up, and I was still hooked on purity culture so it went nowhere.
I didn’t have feelings for the fourth and fifth guys either. I only went out with them because they asked me, and out of loneliness and being too guilty to say no, I talked to them for longer than I should have, wasting everyone’s time.
I don’t know if this is from trauma, but I don’t feel attraction to most guys in real life. I know I’m straight because I have a million crushes on famous guys. It’s because I don’t feel safe, fearing that I’ll accidentally bring someone damaging into my life that I can’t get rid of. Someone who doesn’t have the best intentions, and I struggle to hurt feelings by turning people down. What if we do get into a relationship, and I find out he has a belief that’s a deal breaker for me? I’m afraid I’ll temporarily tolerate something that will inevitably lead to us separating, but I’m too spineless to end things when I should. It’s mostly because I don’t know how to say no, but also because I’d feel back at square one, single and alone.
Now I’m in a weird place where I feel like I need to figure myself out more before I try inviting someone in. But I’m 27, and feel “over the hill,” especially as someone with virtually zero real romantic experience. I definitely don’t want my first kiss to be at the alter, but at the same time I’m conflicted on how the heck to feel comfortable with the idea of gasp having sex outside of marriage. I don’t even know when it would feel “okay.” Is six months into a relationship decently enough? Is that too long to find out if we’re incompatible? I was taught nothing so I’m feeling lost. And it’s hard to keep suppressing my forced tendency of “even holding a man’s hand is cheating on your future husband!”
Most of my prayers now are an endless cycle of “please forgive me, I’m sorry, I don’t know why I don’t feel like praying but I promise I still love You.” I feel awful saying this because I know it’s not true but I do feel unloved sometimes. Like I feel like I’m annoying Jesus somehow when I babble on about whatever thing I’m distraught about. But if I go through the default prayer order of Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, and THEN finally Supplication, it feels insincere. I don’t want to speed through worshipful prayers just to get to the part I really feel like doing, begging for some sort of help. But I feel almost obligated to essentially suck up to God first before saying what I really mean. That doesn’t feel like a real honest relationship to me and it’s a rut I’ve been desperate to get out of.
Every January 1st and every birthday, for probably the past good 5 or 6 years, I’ve started a “One Year Bible” plan that I always end up abandoning after like 10 days. I just can’t stick to it. It’s not even strictly Genesis-Revelation order. It sprinkles in some chapters from the Old Testament, New Testament, Psalms, and Proverbs every day, and each day takes maybe 15 minutes max to do. But somehow I always miss a day, then never catch up, saying I’ll try again the next “landmark day,” January 1st or my birthday, whichever comes next. I don’t know why I can’t love reading scripture. I want to so badly, but I don’t crave it unless I’ve had a nightmare and I need something to calm me down. It’s not a daily desire for me and I wish it was.
This post was a little all over the place, but I guess what I’m trying to ask is how do I cope with the loss of who I thought I was? How do I get comfortable with who I am now? I’m horrified at how long I subscribed to my parents’ beliefs without questioning anything. I just adopted any and everything I was told, and it created a clueless, confused adult.

1. Dark Water

Dark Water is a 2002 Japanese horror film that was adapted into a 2005 American version starring Jennifer Connelly. In both movies, a mother (named Dahlia; the Black Dahlia was found murdered near the Cecil Hotel) and daughter (named Cecilia, which sounds eerily like the Cecil Hotel) move into a new apartment where discolored water starts coming out of the faucets. The weird water and spooky elevator eventually lead them to discovering a dead body in the apartment's water supply. If you boil down the movie to its most basic elements, you get the story of Elisa Lam.
Lam was found in the Cecil Hotel's water tank about a week after the LAPD posted a video of her acting strangely in the elevator. Before her body was found, guests complained about the low water pressure and strange tasting and discolored water. It was almost like life imitated art — people legitimately wondered if someone or some higher power was deliberately playing out the movie's plot.

1. Morbid the Death Metal Musician

Morbid, or Pablo Vergara, is a death metal musician who found himself in the middle of the Elisa Lam case after web sleuths looked into his videos. A year before Lam died, he posted a video about staying at the Cecil Hotel. People started digging up songs on his channel about someone drowning and young women being chased and murdered. Web sleuths thought that he was leaving crumbs to flaunt the fact that he murdered Lam. But by his account in the docuseries, Vergara wasn't in the country when Lam died. However, people flagged his social media handles, and his YouTube, email, and Facebook accounts were eventually terminated.

1. LAM-ELISA test for tuberculosis

After Lam died, a tuberculosis outbreak plagued Los Angeles, especially among the homeless community in Skid Row by the Cecil Hotel. The test for the tuberculosis was literally her name, but backwards: LAM-ELISA, which stood for Lipoarabinomannan (LAM) Enzyme-Linked Immunosorbent Assay (ELISA). Conspiracy theorists immediately speculated that Lam was effectively a biological weapon of sorts. They discovered that she was a student from the University of British Columbia, which has a reputable tuberculosis research center. This particular theory has disturbing eugenic undertones that posits Lam was sent to control the homeless population. According to this theory, Lam died because she either knew too much or planned to expose whoever sent her. But according to her autopsy report, Lam did not exhibit any signs of tuberculosis.

1. The Last Bookstore

The last place where anyone saw Lam was, eerily enough, Los Angeles' The Last Bookstore. But this name wasn't the only strange coincidence. If you look up The Last Bookstore's domain, you'll find a postal code in its registration information: V5G 4S2. Online sleuths put the postal code into Google Maps and found the pinpoint at Lam's burial spot, Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Canada.
LINK

I had a few dreams today, after struggling to stay asleep. Yet again. I've been having adrenaline every time I wake up, for several days now. Waking up from muscle spasms/aches. It feels as if I'm having an allergic reaction to something I ate.
I was in a mall, with a transporting device. I had dreamt about cake for hours, seeing a lemon crust and cream filling. The top probably had something on it, that I'm forgetting. Now, I was stepping into this machine/portal. The escapism, was exhilarating. I wished I could stay here forever.
It sent me to a section in the mall, where I saw another person. I ran away from my family, then met this interesting personality. I can't remember what she said to me. She could've been an antagonist. In the next dream, I was at my sister's boyfriend's house. He talked to me, looking at old photos of me as a toddler on the wall. 'Those look like shark eyes.' I remarked, picking one up where my eyes were dilated. He mentioned a photo where I was standing beside the/a christmas tree. Another one, where my eyes were also noticeable. That might've been the one he was talking about. I saw the christmas tree photo, and didn't like myself in any of them. On the tv, an ad for IMAX came on. I wondered what event horizon would be like on the screen there. The commercial was advertising for a new boring oscar-type film. A girl then approached me, asking me about who my favorite euphoria characters were, by just mentioning their fist names, out of context. 'I don't watch euphoria.' I said, amusing her. 'You're funny..' She replied, genuinely. Her voice was real, distinguishable. It felt so real. 'Everytime you talk/respond, your eyes sparkle/twinkle..' She said. I mentioned that I'm a pisces; that pisces and aquarius are known for having mystical eyes. Eyes that look subhuman. She agreed, mentioning friends of hers with those signs. I loved her energy. It was so high vibrational and blissful. Earlier, I had telepathically saw someone park their car in a parking lot. My teachers walked past me, annoyed by my presence.
'They dilate when I talk, probably.' I mentioned. 'Jupiter.' Doing a hand signal, to show expansion; which she immediately understood. 'Jupiter also rules pisces..' She nodded. My mercury placement could cause my eyes distinction too, I thought mentally to myself. There was a stack of something white next to me, maybe opal. I turned away from my side, to look at the glass case full of sega games behind me. 'I was too young for sega genesis.' I said to myself, seeing a guy in the corner of my eye. The IMAX ad came on a second time. This time I recognized it. I turned to shove fruity pebbles straight into my mouth. Mandy moore started playing, singing about god. It was top of the world, but with a religious theme.

TW - Narcissistic Abuse, thoughts of suicide, 8 month old daughter
Hey everyone. Hope you are all doing well. Just looking for some support here. If any moms have faced a similar situation please please please reach out. I’m dying to have support or a friend to chat with
To make a long story short… I was married. For 1.5 years. My spouse turned out to be a narcissistic abuser and destroyed every bit of confidence I have. Used to spit on me in public, call me names, anything you can think of… you name it. I got pregnant unexpectedly in Jan 2023, and had my daughter at 30 weeks in august. She was in the NICU for 3 months. I saw her every single day in those months
I finally made a big decision to leave my spouse in December. I packed my bags in a hurry and left to stay at a friends home before moving into a shelter in Maryland for abused women.
Eventually I let my ex see my daughter because his mother was in town and wanted to meet her. I figured it would give me a break too to lol for work and finish up my studies (I’m in college online). A few days later I get a photo of my ex and my baby and his mother on a plane to California. They took her and all of her belongings and emptied our old rental and left.
Then we fought in court for custody and ultimately I gave him full custody because I was:

1. Scared of my ex for retaliation like he always does
2. I had bad PPD due to my abuse from him and feeling stressed
3. The guardian ad litem said it’s best for our daughter to stay with him because he makes a good salary and has family support in California whereas I was not working at the time, technically homeless, and did not have family support or money.

I live in Maryland for reference.
I haven’t seen my daughter since February. She’s 8 months old. I keep asking my ex now that I have a good job and money and almost done with my degree if we can live close to eachother so we can coparent, he keeps denying it. He makes it very clear she is his daughter and he is raising her as a single father. I’m literally begging him to let her be in my life and spend nights with me if I move to California. He constantly denys it and says it’s better if I am non existent in her life.
Like what do I do? I feel like a failure. I am extremely depressed as I feel my heart is so empty. I just want her in my arms and to sleep next to her. I just constantly think about how I would rather just end the pain and kill myself but I know that’s not a option. Everyday just feels like daunting and I just feel like if I don’t have her in my life, then what’s the point?
Please please please don’t leave me any negative feedback. I went through so much narcisssitc abuse that at the time I wasn’t even thinking correctly, and I even told the court about the abuse I faced and no one would listen. I just feel like I have ultimately screwed the future outcome of both mine and my daughters life.

Can anyone point me in the direction of an indie album with a pink cover and some simple drawings/characters on the front that is from approximately 2006-2008? I loved this album once upon a time but am unable to remember the name or artist. Smaller band.
Ive been having a hankering for this type of music recently and it is killing me that I cant remember. Any help welcome! Thanks!