Whack your teachers
Teachers
2008.12.23 12:39 Teachers
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2017.10.27 04:08 Aquazalea Australian Teachers
A community primarily for Australian teachers to discuss the profession. Our community is open to all individuals interested in teaching and learning, focusing on providing support and resources for Australian teachers. We welcome the valuable contributions of pre-service teachers, school support staff communities, aspiring teachers, and anyone interested in the profession. 1. Be nice. 2. Keep the content related to teaching and learning in Australia.
2010.01.27 02:45 Wicca: Reconnecting with the Gods
Wicca is a neopagan religion based on ancient pagan beliefs. It's an earth-based religion that believes in a God and Goddess as representative of a greater pantheistic godhead. Wicca includes a system of ethics and teaches that we all are ultimately responsible for our own actions. We believe in gods. We believe in magic. We believe in multiple realities. We practice alone, or in groups. We practice witchcraft.
2024.04.14 19:32 StavrosAndres The summary I made with the sequence of the Poppy Playtime chapters
Chapter 1 A beautiful day at the Playtime.co toy factory! Our protagonist
couldn't come, and at Playtime.co they not only made toys but also experimented with
innocent children to put into bodies like Huggy Wuggy, Mommy Long legs, CatNap, Boxy Boo, Mini smiling critters, and other entities
One day they did an experiment that was not so well controlled.
1006 The prototype, the prototype, is an extremely intelligent being capable of controlling
other individuals and evading the company's security methods became too confident and so he escaped! Experiment 1006 managed to gain control of Huggy Wuggy Mommy Long Legs
And CatNap Boxy Boo and the Mini smiling critters making them attack EVERYONE once the employees died they hide them and eat them, this is where
Our protagonist enters, recovered and notices that they sent him a document.
which was from his ex-factory playtime.co said everyone believed the staff disappeared
years ago, but we are not still here FIND THE FLOWER and it comes with a VHS of the old Poppy commercial, a doll so intelligent that it even has human consciousness capable of
talk to humans this doll is the one you have to save when you enter the factory you notice that it was empty there was absolutely no one you found the security room which you needed
keys with colors when entering the gift area the train has the colors green pink yellow red which he wrote and managed to enter the office he found a VHS
and he put it on the VHS showing an object that was used in the company, the Grab-Pack were like cannons with hands, these hands came with a cane, half there are 2 hands with which each one has a half cane, if it came alone one this would use most of the rod
You could grab objects and interact with the doors using the scanner some came with others and conduct electricity with the cane they had two hands, one red and one blue, but they dispense the grabpack only with the blue hand so we can only access the doors with the blue hand upon entering the first room we meet Huggy Wuggy a blue monster with a red smile with adorable eyes and a bow on his neck he looks very adorable from the outside, but from the inside he is a killing machine when scanning the door with the blue hand it runs out of electricity and huggy comes out with a key which helps us access where we must conduct electricity to open the door after all that we access the door where huggy with his hand plays with us for when we Let's get closer, take out your hand, enter a warehouse, put the batteries for a claw which will give us the red hand, access the vents, activate the conveyor belt with the puzzle.
and we enter the make a friend room where we will have to make a toy, we conduct energy to the machines, we turn it on and we make our toy in four processes: 1 Remove the pieces 2 Disassemble the entire toy 3 Assemble the toy 4 Scan the toy and now with the output Nearby we enter our Cat Bee toy or bee cat in Spanish into the scanner and it opens the door and when we almost reach the Exit we find Huggy Wuggy in his monstrous version 2 lines of teeth back and forth in one way or another he enters the vents and he chases us we manage to reach the end of the conveyor belt we lower a box and Huggy trips over the box and falls showing blood stains when we get to Poppy's house we open his cage and he says You opened my cage.
The doors are marked with two hands, one red and one blue. Our protagonist never discarded the GrabPack. We enter a room where there is a key that opens the office of the owner of the Playtime.co toy factory. Poppy is waiting for us to conduct electricity so we can open the other gate. Here, we discover a useful mechanic: we can use our GrabPack with one hand to shoot a handle and easily avoid obstacles.
After that, Poppy tells us that we should trust her. However, the hand of Mommy Long Legs takes Poppy to a deep well. Scared by the situation, our protagonist jumps in to look for Poppy. Then, we have to solve another electricity conduction puzzle. This one will be more difficult because the puzzle has electricity anti-passage gates. When an electric pole in a puzzle is activated, they close, causing the electric driving cane to return.
After that, a door opens and we see another door with a suspicious red hand. Most of the doors with a single hand were blue, but it doesn’t matter. We just shoot our hand and-- Mommy appears, announcing a new player. She tears our red hand from our GrabPack and says that it has been a long time since a Playcare child has entered, that is, after the tremendous murder. She says that it is unfair to give you the code just like that and that we will play 3 games. The train code is divided into three parts.
We make our hand green, a hand that conducts wireless electricity, that is, without using almost any cane. The first game is musical memory. A pattern will be shown on the screen and we must follow that pattern correctly. A rabbit with two gold-colored plates, called a diver, will use them to crush our head. If we follow the pattern correctly, Bunzo will go up and if we do it wrong, Bunzo will go faster. The screen warns us that the test will become much more difficult and that sometimes you will not be able to see the screen because it is going too fast.
Then, the game starts to malfunction, adding words, symbols, colors that are not what they say on the screen. For example, the color is blue and the text turns red. It starts to put pure filler. We click a button with our GrabPack which turns the game off and Mommy gives us our code, only the first part.
The second game is Wack a Wuggy, the style of whack-a-mole, but with our previous enemy Huggy Wuggy. Only that they are several colors and small. Mommy tells us employees used a rope to keep toys from getting too close to children.
“And don’t hurt them,” well, it turns out… that Mommy cut that same rope. We have to hit the mini Huggies with our GrabPack hands. We did it and they gave us the code. The 3rd game is Statues, the last one. In this game, it’s like red light, green light, only that the green light is lights off and the red light is lights on. We find the float handle with which we break a window of Mommy’s observer.
Mommy scolds us, saying that the game is very simple and that we should go back so they can give us the code, but we disobey its rules. She says, “COME BACK TO ME!” in a sinister way. Then we go on a chase and we even have to access the sewers. After all that, we access the blue hand room, but it turns out that the scanning process takes longer than normal. When opening the door, it also makes us nervous, since when Mommy puts our hand on the scanner, she is getting closer.
Fortunately, we don’t die. We come to a crusher. Mommy gets her hand stuck and we turn it on. A bloody scene ensues, filled with suffering. Mommy screams, telling us, “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?” and “YOU CAN DO IT.” When the crusher reaches the torso, Mommy dies.
Then we go back to the game station where Poppy is waiting for us with the last part of the code. When entering the train code and turning it on, we go normally. Poppy tells us that we are perfect for this and that we can’t leave yet, and that we will have to save the factory from eternal horrors.
In the chapter 3
We get presented a carebears-style show named smiling critters
the members are dogday catnap kickinchicken bobbybearhug hoppyhopscotch picky piggy
craftycorn bubbabubbaphant the characters they looked pretty innocent and nice.
then catnap the purple cat with moon collar spreads a red gas that make all the critters
laugh ominously and then sleep and they never waked up then a channel announces us that
the plushie from the smiling critters line *catnap* the purple cat was causing kids nightmares with the red gas scent and got retired forever, *flashback* after poppy said that to us our train was going too fast then a alarm starts beeping and the screen says unsafe speeds stop train when we brake the train it brakes too hard that the train dumps
leaving us unconscious and then catnap grabs our body and it sends us in a trash zone where we would get smashed fortunately not we solve some parkour head to an elevator where the owner of playtime co says if you look at the world of today what do you think it needs of he asked and his answers where money didnt get enough understanding i cant get some faith the common man lost it elliot says that no one of the answer were happily told that meanns none of then did a smile and that smile is hope and understanding etc we head to the playcare a friendly orphanage that looked childish our objective that ollie says its to head the red gas that catnap used on the show the sleeping gas needs to left but it wont be so simple we need to solve a lot of puzzles and we get a new grabpack its called grabpack 2.0 its a prototype that hs air jets and extended light cane this grabpack comes with a purple hand a hand that can boost us to fly but not forever-like its a limited effect that can only be activated on purple hand triggers but will be too necessary first we need to get in a house full of puzzles once that finished and the generator activated we need to get in a school to activate a generator the price? a creepy female teacher chasing us and we need batterys to open the door the teacher chases us when we dont see she and we see she she will stop once the robot teacher gets smashed by the lever gate we get a orange hand the hand has a gun pose this gun can shoot flare it can scare things once we head to the playhouse we find some cute-like plushies of the smiling critters that crawl cutely but they arent so cute has they seem they are hungry for us, once we finish all of that, dogday tells us that the plushies are forced to kill to be fed, *yes it sounds sad*, and then dogday screams, OH NO, GO RUN, his legs got cutted by catnap, and the plushies of the critters possesed him by entering his torso and make him chase us and we made it all of that and we head the concelours office where catnap removes our facemask we got at home sweet home and make us dream with the event the HOUR OF JOY the alarm sounds the screams are playing everywhere then we turned the generator succesfully we get a huge battery that opens the door of the gas station but then catnap appears with his red gas that red gas makes us think that catnap its a white and skinny and terryfing with a horrible smile then we need to place some batterys to charge a green hand input once that catnap comes and we electrocute him and then experimente 1006 hand appears and catnap thinks his a friendly wave and wakes up and waves too but then the prototype 1006 betrays him murdering him with his sharp hand
submitted by StavrosAndres to PoppyPlaytime [link] [comments]
couldn't come, and at Playtime.co they not only made toys but also experimented with
innocent children to put into bodies like Huggy Wuggy, Mommy Long legs, CatNap, Boxy Boo, Mini smiling critters, and other entities
One day they did an experiment that was not so well controlled.
1006 The prototype, the prototype, is an extremely intelligent being capable of controlling
other individuals and evading the company's security methods became too confident and so he escaped! Experiment 1006 managed to gain control of Huggy Wuggy Mommy Long Legs
And CatNap Boxy Boo and the Mini smiling critters making them attack EVERYONE once the employees died they hide them and eat them, this is where
Our protagonist enters, recovered and notices that they sent him a document.
which was from his ex-factory playtime.co said everyone believed the staff disappeared
years ago, but we are not still here FIND THE FLOWER and it comes with a VHS of the old Poppy commercial, a doll so intelligent that it even has human consciousness capable of
talk to humans this doll is the one you have to save when you enter the factory you notice that it was empty there was absolutely no one you found the security room which you needed
keys with colors when entering the gift area the train has the colors green pink yellow red which he wrote and managed to enter the office he found a VHS
and he put it on the VHS showing an object that was used in the company, the Grab-Pack were like cannons with hands, these hands came with a cane, half there are 2 hands with which each one has a half cane, if it came alone one this would use most of the rod
You could grab objects and interact with the doors using the scanner some came with others and conduct electricity with the cane they had two hands, one red and one blue, but they dispense the grabpack only with the blue hand so we can only access the doors with the blue hand upon entering the first room we meet Huggy Wuggy a blue monster with a red smile with adorable eyes and a bow on his neck he looks very adorable from the outside, but from the inside he is a killing machine when scanning the door with the blue hand it runs out of electricity and huggy comes out with a key which helps us access where we must conduct electricity to open the door after all that we access the door where huggy with his hand plays with us for when we Let's get closer, take out your hand, enter a warehouse, put the batteries for a claw which will give us the red hand, access the vents, activate the conveyor belt with the puzzle.
and we enter the make a friend room where we will have to make a toy, we conduct energy to the machines, we turn it on and we make our toy in four processes: 1 Remove the pieces 2 Disassemble the entire toy 3 Assemble the toy 4 Scan the toy and now with the output Nearby we enter our Cat Bee toy or bee cat in Spanish into the scanner and it opens the door and when we almost reach the Exit we find Huggy Wuggy in his monstrous version 2 lines of teeth back and forth in one way or another he enters the vents and he chases us we manage to reach the end of the conveyor belt we lower a box and Huggy trips over the box and falls showing blood stains when we get to Poppy's house we open his cage and he says You opened my cage.
The doors are marked with two hands, one red and one blue. Our protagonist never discarded the GrabPack. We enter a room where there is a key that opens the office of the owner of the Playtime.co toy factory. Poppy is waiting for us to conduct electricity so we can open the other gate. Here, we discover a useful mechanic: we can use our GrabPack with one hand to shoot a handle and easily avoid obstacles.
After that, Poppy tells us that we should trust her. However, the hand of Mommy Long Legs takes Poppy to a deep well. Scared by the situation, our protagonist jumps in to look for Poppy. Then, we have to solve another electricity conduction puzzle. This one will be more difficult because the puzzle has electricity anti-passage gates. When an electric pole in a puzzle is activated, they close, causing the electric driving cane to return.
After that, a door opens and we see another door with a suspicious red hand. Most of the doors with a single hand were blue, but it doesn’t matter. We just shoot our hand and-- Mommy appears, announcing a new player. She tears our red hand from our GrabPack and says that it has been a long time since a Playcare child has entered, that is, after the tremendous murder. She says that it is unfair to give you the code just like that and that we will play 3 games. The train code is divided into three parts.
We make our hand green, a hand that conducts wireless electricity, that is, without using almost any cane. The first game is musical memory. A pattern will be shown on the screen and we must follow that pattern correctly. A rabbit with two gold-colored plates, called a diver, will use them to crush our head. If we follow the pattern correctly, Bunzo will go up and if we do it wrong, Bunzo will go faster. The screen warns us that the test will become much more difficult and that sometimes you will not be able to see the screen because it is going too fast.
Then, the game starts to malfunction, adding words, symbols, colors that are not what they say on the screen. For example, the color is blue and the text turns red. It starts to put pure filler. We click a button with our GrabPack which turns the game off and Mommy gives us our code, only the first part.
The second game is Wack a Wuggy, the style of whack-a-mole, but with our previous enemy Huggy Wuggy. Only that they are several colors and small. Mommy tells us employees used a rope to keep toys from getting too close to children.
“And don’t hurt them,” well, it turns out… that Mommy cut that same rope. We have to hit the mini Huggies with our GrabPack hands. We did it and they gave us the code. The 3rd game is Statues, the last one. In this game, it’s like red light, green light, only that the green light is lights off and the red light is lights on. We find the float handle with which we break a window of Mommy’s observer.
Mommy scolds us, saying that the game is very simple and that we should go back so they can give us the code, but we disobey its rules. She says, “COME BACK TO ME!” in a sinister way. Then we go on a chase and we even have to access the sewers. After all that, we access the blue hand room, but it turns out that the scanning process takes longer than normal. When opening the door, it also makes us nervous, since when Mommy puts our hand on the scanner, she is getting closer.
Fortunately, we don’t die. We come to a crusher. Mommy gets her hand stuck and we turn it on. A bloody scene ensues, filled with suffering. Mommy screams, telling us, “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?” and “YOU CAN DO IT.” When the crusher reaches the torso, Mommy dies.
Then we go back to the game station where Poppy is waiting for us with the last part of the code. When entering the train code and turning it on, we go normally. Poppy tells us that we are perfect for this and that we can’t leave yet, and that we will have to save the factory from eternal horrors.
In the chapter 3
We get presented a carebears-style show named smiling critters
the members are dogday catnap kickinchicken bobbybearhug hoppyhopscotch picky piggy
craftycorn bubbabubbaphant the characters they looked pretty innocent and nice.
then catnap the purple cat with moon collar spreads a red gas that make all the critters
laugh ominously and then sleep and they never waked up then a channel announces us that
the plushie from the smiling critters line *catnap* the purple cat was causing kids nightmares with the red gas scent and got retired forever, *flashback* after poppy said that to us our train was going too fast then a alarm starts beeping and the screen says unsafe speeds stop train when we brake the train it brakes too hard that the train dumps
leaving us unconscious and then catnap grabs our body and it sends us in a trash zone where we would get smashed fortunately not we solve some parkour head to an elevator where the owner of playtime co says if you look at the world of today what do you think it needs of he asked and his answers where money didnt get enough understanding i cant get some faith the common man lost it elliot says that no one of the answer were happily told that meanns none of then did a smile and that smile is hope and understanding etc we head to the playcare a friendly orphanage that looked childish our objective that ollie says its to head the red gas that catnap used on the show the sleeping gas needs to left but it wont be so simple we need to solve a lot of puzzles and we get a new grabpack its called grabpack 2.0 its a prototype that hs air jets and extended light cane this grabpack comes with a purple hand a hand that can boost us to fly but not forever-like its a limited effect that can only be activated on purple hand triggers but will be too necessary first we need to get in a house full of puzzles once that finished and the generator activated we need to get in a school to activate a generator the price? a creepy female teacher chasing us and we need batterys to open the door the teacher chases us when we dont see she and we see she she will stop once the robot teacher gets smashed by the lever gate we get a orange hand the hand has a gun pose this gun can shoot flare it can scare things once we head to the playhouse we find some cute-like plushies of the smiling critters that crawl cutely but they arent so cute has they seem they are hungry for us, once we finish all of that, dogday tells us that the plushies are forced to kill to be fed, *yes it sounds sad*, and then dogday screams, OH NO, GO RUN, his legs got cutted by catnap, and the plushies of the critters possesed him by entering his torso and make him chase us and we made it all of that and we head the concelours office where catnap removes our facemask we got at home sweet home and make us dream with the event the HOUR OF JOY the alarm sounds the screams are playing everywhere then we turned the generator succesfully we get a huge battery that opens the door of the gas station but then catnap appears with his red gas that red gas makes us think that catnap its a white and skinny and terryfing with a horrible smile then we need to place some batterys to charge a green hand input once that catnap comes and we electrocute him and then experimente 1006 hand appears and catnap thinks his a friendly wave and wakes up and waves too but then the prototype 1006 betrays him murdering him with his sharp hand
2024.04.12 23:06 lllAgelll Part 4: WP Elves Marrying Humans (Place Holder Title)
As we all walked out the door of the guild and down the road out of town.
Jalar asks:
"So, what's your plans for tonight? You seem like you're much more keen on getting this quest over with as soon as possible."
Aranod replies:
"I mean, partly it IS because I have plans, but honestly... I also just hate dealing with orcs. They smell so bad. You remember last time we hunted orcs, right? I don't really remember that with fondness."
Jalar snorted:
"Yeah, you reeked for weeks. Every day, you came into the guild and got side eyes from all the members. It got so bad that we had you sit outside most days while we got the quests."
Rold Interjects:
"Listen... that won't happen this time. If I see em falling toward you... I'll whack em away."
Aranod replies:
You better, I do really have plans with Elanu.. and she will do more than light me on fire if I come how smelling like that again. If by some chance you fail... we are never taking orc quests again.
Rold shocked says:
Absolutely, but you don't have to worry, I've got your back.
Jalar cuts in:
"So that's all well and good, but you didn't really answer my initial question? What's your plans with Elanu?"
Aranod replies:
"Well, that's the thing... this morning, I made a big show of it and told her we should go out and start our upcoming anniversary early, but the truth is I have no idea what to do or where to go.. I wanted to make a big thing of it being that it's our 300th anniversary, but honestly, as a university teacher, she has access to short-range spatial movement. It's unlikely that she hasn't explored the surrounding area at length for her work. She's also not much for 'roughing it' in the woods.
Luckily for me... I remembered that every 100 years or so, the elves hold a huge festival. It goes on for 3 days, and it's way far away from any human civilization, so I doubt she's ever been to it."
SMACK!
Jalar pulls his hand back from the back of Aranod's head and says:
"So you just plan on winging it?"
Rovain, who had been playing his lute and humming this whole time we walked, chuckled then stopped playing and asks:
"Wait, aren't the elves very unwelcoming of humans?"
Aranod rubbing the back of his head, sighed:
"Well, yes and no. Elves do their best to stay out of affairs of humans on a national scale because... face it. You all do kind of get into a lot of precarious situations, and while we are generally neutral politically. The elves can't deny your impacts on history. A lot of the people who saw the wars firsthand are still alive today."
Jalar quickly interjects:
"While yes, we humans have had rough history, we are striv...."
Aranod cuts him off:
"I'm not asking you to apologize on behalf of your species. That's absurd and frankly unfair... I'm just pointing out that elven nations don't hate you... they are just a bit wary is all and justifiably so."
Rovain replies:
"Well, fair enough, apologies for bringing unnecessary issues.. I was just looking out for both of you. The last thing I want is for you both to be in harms way over something that's out of your control."
Aranod chuckles:
I know, buddy. Truth be told, I wouldn't have brought it up if I wasn't looking for second opinions on this one.
Rovain replies:
"Okay, so... all excess aside... what's your working plan?"
Aranod replies:
"So Elanu and I's anniversary isn't for another one and a half moon cycles, and the festival isn't for two. My plan is that we take a series of carriage rides towards that destination and explore sights along the way. Stopping as we see fit and taking our time.. if we were to take carriage rides directly to the elven nation, only stopping for food and sleep. It would take us about 10 days. This gives us the time to relax and enjoy our time together."
Rovain replied:
"Isn't that likely to cost a lot of money?"
Aranod replied:
"Yeah, but I've had a lot stored for years now, and if worst comes to worst, being part of the guild allows me to essentually work from anywhere if needed. I should be okay in that department."
Rovain replies:
"Well, if that's the case, then I'm sure it should be fun, but the prospect of you just grouping up with other random people is a bit of a cold slap to the face."
Both the other group members nodded in agreement.
Aranod quickly points out:
"I've partied up with people from before you were born. How is this any different?"
Rovain replies:
"Did you just pull the 'back in my day, you young whipper snapper' card on me? Come on, man. That's not fair."
Aranod chuckles as they keep walking. By this time, they had gotten out of the city and were in the field that sprawled far passed the city limits.
Aronod quickly perks up:
"By the way. I know we are hunting Orcs, but what's the details of the quest? Does anyone still have the quest manifest?"
Jalar hands a booklet over to him with a ruffled peice of paper wax stamped onto it. Aranod starts skimming the booklet and immediately slams his face into his hand as they walk.
Aranod unprovoked says:
"Rold.....sometimes...."
Rold confused replies:
"What?!"
The two others snickering in the background.
submitted by lllAgelll to AgeWrites [link] [comments]
Jalar asks:
"So, what's your plans for tonight? You seem like you're much more keen on getting this quest over with as soon as possible."
Aranod replies:
"I mean, partly it IS because I have plans, but honestly... I also just hate dealing with orcs. They smell so bad. You remember last time we hunted orcs, right? I don't really remember that with fondness."
Jalar snorted:
"Yeah, you reeked for weeks. Every day, you came into the guild and got side eyes from all the members. It got so bad that we had you sit outside most days while we got the quests."
Rold Interjects:
"Listen... that won't happen this time. If I see em falling toward you... I'll whack em away."
Aranod replies:
You better, I do really have plans with Elanu.. and she will do more than light me on fire if I come how smelling like that again. If by some chance you fail... we are never taking orc quests again.
Rold shocked says:
Absolutely, but you don't have to worry, I've got your back.
Jalar cuts in:
"So that's all well and good, but you didn't really answer my initial question? What's your plans with Elanu?"
Aranod replies:
"Well, that's the thing... this morning, I made a big show of it and told her we should go out and start our upcoming anniversary early, but the truth is I have no idea what to do or where to go.. I wanted to make a big thing of it being that it's our 300th anniversary, but honestly, as a university teacher, she has access to short-range spatial movement. It's unlikely that she hasn't explored the surrounding area at length for her work. She's also not much for 'roughing it' in the woods.
Luckily for me... I remembered that every 100 years or so, the elves hold a huge festival. It goes on for 3 days, and it's way far away from any human civilization, so I doubt she's ever been to it."
SMACK!
Jalar pulls his hand back from the back of Aranod's head and says:
"So you just plan on winging it?"
Rovain, who had been playing his lute and humming this whole time we walked, chuckled then stopped playing and asks:
"Wait, aren't the elves very unwelcoming of humans?"
Aranod rubbing the back of his head, sighed:
"Well, yes and no. Elves do their best to stay out of affairs of humans on a national scale because... face it. You all do kind of get into a lot of precarious situations, and while we are generally neutral politically. The elves can't deny your impacts on history. A lot of the people who saw the wars firsthand are still alive today."
Jalar quickly interjects:
"While yes, we humans have had rough history, we are striv...."
Aranod cuts him off:
"I'm not asking you to apologize on behalf of your species. That's absurd and frankly unfair... I'm just pointing out that elven nations don't hate you... they are just a bit wary is all and justifiably so."
Rovain replies:
"Well, fair enough, apologies for bringing unnecessary issues.. I was just looking out for both of you. The last thing I want is for you both to be in harms way over something that's out of your control."
Aranod chuckles:
I know, buddy. Truth be told, I wouldn't have brought it up if I wasn't looking for second opinions on this one.
Rovain replies:
"Okay, so... all excess aside... what's your working plan?"
Aranod replies:
"So Elanu and I's anniversary isn't for another one and a half moon cycles, and the festival isn't for two. My plan is that we take a series of carriage rides towards that destination and explore sights along the way. Stopping as we see fit and taking our time.. if we were to take carriage rides directly to the elven nation, only stopping for food and sleep. It would take us about 10 days. This gives us the time to relax and enjoy our time together."
Rovain replied:
"Isn't that likely to cost a lot of money?"
Aranod replied:
"Yeah, but I've had a lot stored for years now, and if worst comes to worst, being part of the guild allows me to essentually work from anywhere if needed. I should be okay in that department."
Rovain replies:
"Well, if that's the case, then I'm sure it should be fun, but the prospect of you just grouping up with other random people is a bit of a cold slap to the face."
Both the other group members nodded in agreement.
Aranod quickly points out:
"I've partied up with people from before you were born. How is this any different?"
Rovain replies:
"Did you just pull the 'back in my day, you young whipper snapper' card on me? Come on, man. That's not fair."
Aranod chuckles as they keep walking. By this time, they had gotten out of the city and were in the field that sprawled far passed the city limits.
Aronod quickly perks up:
"By the way. I know we are hunting Orcs, but what's the details of the quest? Does anyone still have the quest manifest?"
Jalar hands a booklet over to him with a ruffled peice of paper wax stamped onto it. Aranod starts skimming the booklet and immediately slams his face into his hand as they walk.
Aranod unprovoked says:
"Rold.....sometimes...."
Rold confused replies:
"What?!"
The two others snickering in the background.
2024.04.11 04:58 i_bardly_knew_ye Just finished Umineko for the first time! Here are some scattered thoughts.
I finished Umineko a few days ago and help, this visual novel has got me in a chokehold. I'm currently drowning in an abyss ruminating on what to do with my life. Sticking with a story this long meant that it essentially became a part of my routine. It took a little more than three months for me to complete, and I'll miss relegating it as my reward every day coming home from a hard day of university or work.
I wanted to give some scattered thoughts about the story so I modelled this post off of Rose Matter's post game discussion video. I’ll also be including other miscellaneous, intermediary musings.
What are your favourite and least favourite episodes?
My favourite episodes are 8 and 7. While I enjoyed Umineko's metafictional debates and triangulating the mystery from multiple angles to reach a solution, I'm a girlie who likes literary fiction and coming-of-age stories. I immediately knew I had to brace myself for an emotional rollercoaster when Battler said he'd open the gameboard one last time to make Ange happy. And Episode 8 did not disappoint. It was a beautiful coming-of-age tale of a girl letting go of the ghosts of her past and learning to live. I also thought that the episode was really clever in presenting the metatextual layers that certain characters, settings and plot developments embody. I really like how Evatrice exemplifies the lid of the unsolved mystery or "cat box" in addition to the goats who symbolise theorists who devise corrosive theories for their own amusement; even if it means dismantling the resting place of the deceased. And of course, the double suicide of Battler and Beatrice is one hell of an image that will forever be burned into my mind. I was fighting tears and the lump in my throat during that sequence. The ending really went the extra mile with the "deaths" of Battler and Ange Ushiromiya and how they both had to put years of distance between them and the Rokkenjima Massacre to heal. I found it so sad that Ange had to accept Tohya's wish to see him as his own person and not her beloved brother. But I hope that their joint réunion with everyone in the Golden Land wouldn’t be the last time the siblings see each other. Regardless, could Tohya finally have accepted his identity and memories as Battler upon being reunited with Beatrice in the Golden Land? Because she welcomes him back as if time merely just paused and resumed. What do you think? Regardless, the ending was the right mix of happy and bittersweet.
I also really enjoyed episode 7 since I saw it as a long time coming. Like Battler, I’m an optimistic person and was pretty bad at solving the mystery at the beginning. I had a hard time suspecting people as I didn’t want to think about anyone possessing the resolve to commit an atrocity of this scale. Since episode 1, I felt largely apathetic about the ‘how’ because it didn’t matter unless I understood the ‘why’. So I appreciate there being an episode dedicated to the ‘why’. But it was episode 7’s Tea Party that had my jaw on the floor. Judging from the squabble the Italians and Japanese had over the gold, I knew immediately that a massacre was going to transpire once the adults solved the epitaph. I don’t know why I was shocked at Rudolf and Kyrie being the perpetrators. Them massacring everyone in cold blood was totally in character. Let’s be real, they’ve probably gutted businesses and are ringleaders in a cartel or something. The Sumaderas probably have ties to the yakuza anyway. And I cried when Eva vowed to never tell Ange about the truth of her mother’s final moments. In that moment, she instantly became a redeemable character. Well played, Ryukishi07.
Just before I name my least favourite episode, I want to make it known that I don’t think there are any bad episodes. The VN maintains a high quality of writing throughout that even my least favourite episode had some great moments. But it’s episode 2. I actually didn’t mind the Downtown Abbey drama between George/Shannon and Jessica/Kanon, (especially now knowing how the truth recontextualizes everything). But I got disheartened at Battler losing the game in such a humiliating manner that it slightly demotivated me as a reader. Maria and Rosa also get more content but the writing in episode 4 has sharper drama reflecting a social realism that hits harder.
What did you think of the balance of mystery and fantasy elements? Any comments on the theory-crafting mechanics of the game?
Umineko is one of those stories that does this seamlessly. I was initially surprised at how the Agatha Christie novel with a dash of slasher horror swerved into an extradiegetic epilogue with the previously unseen Beatrice breaking the fourth wall and appearing on-stage. When all is said and done, I really liked how the fantasy creatures ended either being metatheatrical vessels in the theory-crafting discourse, (e.g., Dlanor, Erika, Will) or cases of maladaptive daydreaming by trauma-bearers. Bridging that gap between reality and fantasy is done very creatively. For example, something I’ve noticed is that the fourth Chiester sister on the ‘Characters panel’ is shown as severely damaged and ‘dead’. If we consider the theory brought up by the goats in episode 8 that the sisters are magical versions of Maria’s toy rabbits, then the fourth sister was ‘killed’ by Rosa as a result of her intentionally breaking one of Maria’s rabbits in episode 4.
It’s also very cool how theatrical Umineko is with the characters returning to the metaverse or backstage to debrief like actors on a stage. Umineko has its fair share of metatextually convoluted and indulgent moments of pantomime theatricality. I mean, hideously smirking characters getting off on the orgasmic pleasure of intellectually humiliating others is iconic. That image of Battler and Erika’s wedding is WILD.
And I love how despite providing answers, Umineko was still able to have its cake and eat it too by ultimately framing everything as conjecture and locked inside the ‘cat box’. On a side note, I like how the Red Truth is used for emotional effect such as the pacing of a reveal being timed to crush a character’s dreams. Logical quantifiers laying out as rules for fair play in the mystery (e.g., Red Truths, Knox’s Decalogue, Van Dine’s Commandments), actually don’t resolve the ambiguities in the mystery. It’s to engage with what could have happened more than what and how it happened. They rule out hypothesized explanations but do not suggest alternatives. And though people might complain that being suspended in this state of uncertainty is frustrating, it effectively ties into the theme of the ‘catbox’ enigma.
But the best thing that fantasy does for the mystery is inject heart into it. I think this is put the most explicitly by Will, a detective driven by his care for the people affected by mysteries. Of course, the dissonance between his goals and Erika’s are very stark as these characters are essentially the antithesis of each other. It’s a shame that they never had a formal conversation together as that would’ve been interesting. Furthermore, the importance of understanding the story’s heart is also exemplified by the gold truth which I interpreted as representing conclusions drawn by someone who understands the story completely.
What were your most emotional moments?
Oh boy, where should I start?
What were some of your favourite tracks?
Which witch had the best drip?
Virgilia has the best witch drip. Love the Edwardian-style hat. And Beatrice's ballgown is iconic too. Funny story actually; I showed a family member a picture of Beatrice and they thought she was holding a cannabis bong.
Also, I burst out laughing during the Love Trials in episode 6 when George tells his motheEvatrice she’s too old to wear childish, lolita clothes.
Who are your favourite characters?
My top three characters are the main protagonist and antagonist Battler and Beatrice and the secondary protagonist Ange.
First of all, Battler totally earns his namesake because he IS a fighter. His ability to put faith in the people he loves and cares about even when all evidence seeks to unjustly incriminate them is admirable. You want to see him succeed because he blinds you with his fighting spirit in spite of all his clumsiness and flaws. He can be a little naïve (e.g., this refusal to suspect family members, handing Erika her duct tape), but I also love how he’s very emotional. His honesty and heart even when he’s cornered into the abyss serve as a beacon of hope for us all. On a side note, he has mad rizz. Even though all of his pick-up lines are something that a serial killer would say, I still found myself blushing.
Beatrice is a tsundere. I love how theatrical she is (I’m addicted to her ‘hohs’ and ‘hora hora horas’). I will say that I wouldn’t have much appreciation for her as an antagonist if it weren’t for the way she is depicted and fleshed out in the ‘Confessions of a Golden Witch’ chapters in the manga. Her many identities give several dimensions to her character in what is essentially a tragic concoction of fatalism and bottled-up shame. Who knew that the detective and culprit in a murder mystery would be embroiled in a romance?
Ange’s arc is probably the most important thing I’ll take away from Umineko. I’ve already gone at length discussing how much I love episode 8 so you bet I’m an Ange stan. But I will say that I don’t understand why people love the Trick ending. I interpreted it as Ange joining arms with Erika as her fellow intellectual rapist. And that’s so sad to me.
My next favourite characters are the four unhinged mothers of Umineko: Eva, Natsuhi, Kyrie and Rosa. It’s key for literary fiction to have social realism so I commend Ryukishi07 on making each member of the Ushiromiya family feel like representational archetypes you’d see in society.
I’ve always been a Natsuhi fan since the first episode. Her silent anguish at being talked down to by her incompetent husband but being the glue binding her family together; speaks of her mental fortitude. Infanticide aside, she is one of the most morally rigid, duty-bound characters. She’s also a good mother to Jessica who definitely had the happiest upbringing out of all her cousins.
Eva is not an entirely a villainous character. She was given a lot of shit for not subscribing to subservient female gender roles in a traditional, patriarchal family. But her pushing her ambitions onto her son make her a toxic, tiger parent. Forking out a fortune to give George regimental lessons that he feels apathy and dread for is a relatable experience of children with overbearing parents. Micromanaging his schedule, keeping a vigilant eye on his grades and taking action on every disparaging comment made at parent-teacher conferences are all astute observations made by Ryukishi07. But Eva is redeemed at the end as she truly loves and cares for Ange, which is more than I can say for the other two mothers.
Rosa is a selfish bitch but one of the most layered, well-written characters in Umineko. Children learn from and copy their parents. Rosa perpetuated her father’s cycle of abuse by mimicking the way he would discipline her as a child. She became an abuser through instinctually copying behaviours that were her norm - such as her father frequently losing his temper and striking her and her older siblings bullying her. And any instances of her being a good and affectionate mother were to receive external validation and not for the genuine wellbeing of her child.
And Kyrie is a sociopath. She initially comes across as likeable when she’s helping Battler with his logic puzzles but she’s mostly façade. Sociopaths learn behaviours to get what they want and she needed to play the part of a loving mother and wife to keep Rudolf. In actuality, she sees all people as disposable. That’s why she’s able to coldly and calmly massacre everyone.
Favourite battles in the series?
Of course, episode 8 is endgame. Therefore, I really liked what the combined effort of all the family members and the fantasy creatures in the penultimate battle symbolised. The preservation of the Golden Land from the goats and Pirate Erika made me genuinely emotional as did Lamdadelta’s swan song.
I also really loved George and Jessica’s love trials in episode 6. However, the fights did not steal the spotlight, the conversations between the adults and children did. Eva and George’s relationship got a lot more fleshed out and I was especially riveted by Jessica and Kyrie’s conversation which was a very underrated moment. Kyrie scarring her niece with her life story is in the contention for one of the best moments in the VN.
And they’re not physical battles but the sequences between Battler and Erika leading up to the climaxes of episode 5 and 6 were amazing.
Some funny theories I came up with while reading (I look back at these and laugh so hard)
What were your thought processes solving the mysteries? What did you get right?
I always thought that it was unlikely for the twilights to be carried by one person. There’s just too many variables for one person to control, (even if Claire did say that she had to leave the roulette up to fate). I knew that accomplices had to corroborate false testimony to make it seem like a 19th person or a ‘witch’ was the culprit. And many murders doubled down on false testimony by showing supernatural elements as the direct cause of the murder. It was always the servants and Nanjo citing supernatural elements as the cause; as well as everyone corroborating supernatural phenomena in episode 4 (that was the most confusing one to decipher and really threw me off). But hey, with gold ingots you could bribe anyone. Furthermore, the Red Truth has some wiggle room. For instance, I always thought that Kanon’s deaths were dodgy due to a lack of a body. I mean it’s “no body, no crime” and the lack of a corpse means that Nanjo couldn’t check for sure if he’s dead. And if Nanjo is an accomplice then who is to say that he wasn't faking testimony of a bunch of corpses actually being dead. So I got a sense the crimes were committed by accomplices doubling down on fake testimony. I wasn't sure of the nitty-gritty details of the ‘how’ (I wish I thought more about that), but as I said, I felt apathy towards the ‘how’ and wanted to know the ‘why’ most of all.
I knew that Shannon and Kanon were in on it together at least. They always seemed bound together as far as their fates are concerned (both wishing for love as ‘furniture’). So if I was right in suspecting them as culprits or accomplices, then their quest for love must be a key motivation. After all, they kept talking about wanting to bring their loved ones to the Golden Land where everyone would give their blessings. But what sealed the deal was that in episode 4 they shared a conversation about the previous games. Now if I was smarter and paid more attention, I could've connected them to Beatrice instantly. Only the game master and everyone in purgatorio should have memories and not the resettable pieces on the gameboard. But still, the ‘why’ wasn't satisfactory for me. I understand maybe wanting to kill Eva and Natsuhi because both women would’ve forbid their children from dating servants but everybody? Even their beloveds George and Jessica and innocents like Maria? I did read ‘Confessions of the Golden Witch’ in the manga and so now I understand, but that did stump me. I did however pick up on what Battler’s sin was. I thought about what he did six years ago. And besides leaving the family register (which Beatrice confirmed was not the answer she was looking for), that left his cringey promise to come for Shannon on a white horse. But at the time that ‘why’ wasn't satisfactory to me because even if she hated him for that, why kill his entire family? I mean yeah, you can add Rudolf to the hit list for making Battler leave the family but still.
But no, I was dumb and didn’t connect Shannon and Kanon to Beatrice until episode 6. The topic of furniture was brought up again which was another puzzle that had me stumped. I had previously thought it was a derogatory term meaning sub-human but those love demons confirmed that sub-human meant incest. So Shannon or Kanon committed incest somehow. Would that mean they’re actually related to George and Jessica? So are they really orphans or was that meant to cover something else? Kinzo has always been a shady guy anyway. And seeing him hanging around the child-like Kuwadorian Beatrice always gave me the ick. But yeah, by the end of episode 6 I concluded that Shannon, Kanon and Beatrice were incomplete souls or ‘illusions’ that you could not physically love. I thought that the culprit could have dissociative identity disorder (DID) but it was more likely they had something similar to Maria where they maladaptively daydreamed to make each of their personas feel very distinct. I think Battler shut down the idea that Maria had DID anyway.
Overall, I think Umineko taught me how to be a more flexible thinker. I remember feeling proud for solving the cheese riddle in episode 6. And I managed to solve Bernkastel’s game in episode 8 pretty quickly. I knew as soon as she said her red truth after the second twilight, the culprit/s pretended to be dead among the first twilight’s victims and must've had an accomplice to carry out the rest of the murders. And the Halloween quiz tournament in episode 8 was also a ton of fun.
What are some criticisms or things I’d change?
I don’t know if there’s a whole lot I’d change or criticise Umineko for. It’s a very well-thought out story that got progressively better the more I read. But I guess if I have to be nit-picky:
In the end, Umineko focused more on the ‘why’ as supposed to the ‘who’ and ‘how’ so I wished it didn’t get so bogged down in the nitty-gritty of the ‘how’ during Battler and Beatrice’s debates. I don’t know how these scenes will reread with the knowledge that the tools of murder weren’t as sophisticated as Battler speculated.
I also wasn't in love with how Battler acted in the middle of episode 6. I thought he was needlesly cruel to Beatrice that it seemed out of character. I know she's not the Beatrice he knows but it was still hard to read through.
And as much as I’m a stan of episode 8 and Ange, I thought it was an odd choice that she wakes up in the Golden Land after reading the book of truth. I thought that after being plunged into oblivion, the implications for Ange’s character would be darker. But I’m happy with what we got in the end so it’s a minor issue.
Concerning the subject of the manga vs the VN, I prefer the VN’s version that points to the existence of more than one truth. I think it is the better creative choice. The only knock against the manga’s adaptation of episode 8 is that it only points to one truth. But besides that, the manga’s adaptation of episode 8 is amazing and enhances the story quite a bit with extra scenes that give everything more context.
What are your takeaway messages from the story?
submitted by i_bardly_knew_ye to umineko [link] [comments]
I wanted to give some scattered thoughts about the story so I modelled this post off of Rose Matter's post game discussion video. I’ll also be including other miscellaneous, intermediary musings.
What are your favourite and least favourite episodes?
My favourite episodes are 8 and 7. While I enjoyed Umineko's metafictional debates and triangulating the mystery from multiple angles to reach a solution, I'm a girlie who likes literary fiction and coming-of-age stories. I immediately knew I had to brace myself for an emotional rollercoaster when Battler said he'd open the gameboard one last time to make Ange happy. And Episode 8 did not disappoint. It was a beautiful coming-of-age tale of a girl letting go of the ghosts of her past and learning to live. I also thought that the episode was really clever in presenting the metatextual layers that certain characters, settings and plot developments embody. I really like how Evatrice exemplifies the lid of the unsolved mystery or "cat box" in addition to the goats who symbolise theorists who devise corrosive theories for their own amusement; even if it means dismantling the resting place of the deceased. And of course, the double suicide of Battler and Beatrice is one hell of an image that will forever be burned into my mind. I was fighting tears and the lump in my throat during that sequence. The ending really went the extra mile with the "deaths" of Battler and Ange Ushiromiya and how they both had to put years of distance between them and the Rokkenjima Massacre to heal. I found it so sad that Ange had to accept Tohya's wish to see him as his own person and not her beloved brother. But I hope that their joint réunion with everyone in the Golden Land wouldn’t be the last time the siblings see each other. Regardless, could Tohya finally have accepted his identity and memories as Battler upon being reunited with Beatrice in the Golden Land? Because she welcomes him back as if time merely just paused and resumed. What do you think? Regardless, the ending was the right mix of happy and bittersweet.
I also really enjoyed episode 7 since I saw it as a long time coming. Like Battler, I’m an optimistic person and was pretty bad at solving the mystery at the beginning. I had a hard time suspecting people as I didn’t want to think about anyone possessing the resolve to commit an atrocity of this scale. Since episode 1, I felt largely apathetic about the ‘how’ because it didn’t matter unless I understood the ‘why’. So I appreciate there being an episode dedicated to the ‘why’. But it was episode 7’s Tea Party that had my jaw on the floor. Judging from the squabble the Italians and Japanese had over the gold, I knew immediately that a massacre was going to transpire once the adults solved the epitaph. I don’t know why I was shocked at Rudolf and Kyrie being the perpetrators. Them massacring everyone in cold blood was totally in character. Let’s be real, they’ve probably gutted businesses and are ringleaders in a cartel or something. The Sumaderas probably have ties to the yakuza anyway. And I cried when Eva vowed to never tell Ange about the truth of her mother’s final moments. In that moment, she instantly became a redeemable character. Well played, Ryukishi07.
Just before I name my least favourite episode, I want to make it known that I don’t think there are any bad episodes. The VN maintains a high quality of writing throughout that even my least favourite episode had some great moments. But it’s episode 2. I actually didn’t mind the Downtown Abbey drama between George/Shannon and Jessica/Kanon, (especially now knowing how the truth recontextualizes everything). But I got disheartened at Battler losing the game in such a humiliating manner that it slightly demotivated me as a reader. Maria and Rosa also get more content but the writing in episode 4 has sharper drama reflecting a social realism that hits harder.
What did you think of the balance of mystery and fantasy elements? Any comments on the theory-crafting mechanics of the game?
Umineko is one of those stories that does this seamlessly. I was initially surprised at how the Agatha Christie novel with a dash of slasher horror swerved into an extradiegetic epilogue with the previously unseen Beatrice breaking the fourth wall and appearing on-stage. When all is said and done, I really liked how the fantasy creatures ended either being metatheatrical vessels in the theory-crafting discourse, (e.g., Dlanor, Erika, Will) or cases of maladaptive daydreaming by trauma-bearers. Bridging that gap between reality and fantasy is done very creatively. For example, something I’ve noticed is that the fourth Chiester sister on the ‘Characters panel’ is shown as severely damaged and ‘dead’. If we consider the theory brought up by the goats in episode 8 that the sisters are magical versions of Maria’s toy rabbits, then the fourth sister was ‘killed’ by Rosa as a result of her intentionally breaking one of Maria’s rabbits in episode 4.
It’s also very cool how theatrical Umineko is with the characters returning to the metaverse or backstage to debrief like actors on a stage. Umineko has its fair share of metatextually convoluted and indulgent moments of pantomime theatricality. I mean, hideously smirking characters getting off on the orgasmic pleasure of intellectually humiliating others is iconic. That image of Battler and Erika’s wedding is WILD.
And I love how despite providing answers, Umineko was still able to have its cake and eat it too by ultimately framing everything as conjecture and locked inside the ‘cat box’. On a side note, I like how the Red Truth is used for emotional effect such as the pacing of a reveal being timed to crush a character’s dreams. Logical quantifiers laying out as rules for fair play in the mystery (e.g., Red Truths, Knox’s Decalogue, Van Dine’s Commandments), actually don’t resolve the ambiguities in the mystery. It’s to engage with what could have happened more than what and how it happened. They rule out hypothesized explanations but do not suggest alternatives. And though people might complain that being suspended in this state of uncertainty is frustrating, it effectively ties into the theme of the ‘catbox’ enigma.
But the best thing that fantasy does for the mystery is inject heart into it. I think this is put the most explicitly by Will, a detective driven by his care for the people affected by mysteries. Of course, the dissonance between his goals and Erika’s are very stark as these characters are essentially the antithesis of each other. It’s a shame that they never had a formal conversation together as that would’ve been interesting. Furthermore, the importance of understanding the story’s heart is also exemplified by the gold truth which I interpreted as representing conclusions drawn by someone who understands the story completely.
What were your most emotional moments?
Oh boy, where should I start?
- The ending sequence of episode 8: Battler and Beatrice's double suicide into the ocean and the magic ending finale with the reunion in the Golden Land
- Natsuhi and Beatrice reconciling during the Halloween party in episode 8. In addition to Beatrice calling Natsuhi her mother and Ange calling Eva her mother.
- The episode 7 tea party, particularly:
- Eva vowing to protect Ange from the truth of her mother’s final moments
- Ange’s blood-curdling scream after Bernkastel declares in red that this is the truth of how that day transpired
- Ange walking atop skyscrapers with “wingless” playing at the end of ep 3 (this was officially the first time the VN took my breath away)
- Ange revealing her identity to Battler and sacrificing herself as a pawn at the end of ep 4
- Maria’s vengeful torture of Rosa in the metaverse in ep 4. This scene was a masterpiece with the sharply written drama reflecting the sad reality of our society’s epidemic of abuse. We were shown the nitty-gritty of who Rosa truly is - a selfish bitch. But brilliant character writing nonetheless.
What were some of your favourite tracks?
- Sentimental: Ricordando il Passato 😭, Far, Soul of Soul, Hope, Wingless, Thanks for Being Born
- Hype/creepy: Patchwork Chimera, Golden Nocturne, Worldend Dominator, Birth of New Witch, Bring the Fate
Which witch had the best drip?
Virgilia has the best witch drip. Love the Edwardian-style hat. And Beatrice's ballgown is iconic too. Funny story actually; I showed a family member a picture of Beatrice and they thought she was holding a cannabis bong.
Also, I burst out laughing during the Love Trials in episode 6 when George tells his motheEvatrice she’s too old to wear childish, lolita clothes.
Who are your favourite characters?
My top three characters are the main protagonist and antagonist Battler and Beatrice and the secondary protagonist Ange.
First of all, Battler totally earns his namesake because he IS a fighter. His ability to put faith in the people he loves and cares about even when all evidence seeks to unjustly incriminate them is admirable. You want to see him succeed because he blinds you with his fighting spirit in spite of all his clumsiness and flaws. He can be a little naïve (e.g., this refusal to suspect family members, handing Erika her duct tape), but I also love how he’s very emotional. His honesty and heart even when he’s cornered into the abyss serve as a beacon of hope for us all. On a side note, he has mad rizz. Even though all of his pick-up lines are something that a serial killer would say, I still found myself blushing.
Beatrice is a tsundere. I love how theatrical she is (I’m addicted to her ‘hohs’ and ‘hora hora horas’). I will say that I wouldn’t have much appreciation for her as an antagonist if it weren’t for the way she is depicted and fleshed out in the ‘Confessions of a Golden Witch’ chapters in the manga. Her many identities give several dimensions to her character in what is essentially a tragic concoction of fatalism and bottled-up shame. Who knew that the detective and culprit in a murder mystery would be embroiled in a romance?
Ange’s arc is probably the most important thing I’ll take away from Umineko. I’ve already gone at length discussing how much I love episode 8 so you bet I’m an Ange stan. But I will say that I don’t understand why people love the Trick ending. I interpreted it as Ange joining arms with Erika as her fellow intellectual rapist. And that’s so sad to me.
My next favourite characters are the four unhinged mothers of Umineko: Eva, Natsuhi, Kyrie and Rosa. It’s key for literary fiction to have social realism so I commend Ryukishi07 on making each member of the Ushiromiya family feel like representational archetypes you’d see in society.
I’ve always been a Natsuhi fan since the first episode. Her silent anguish at being talked down to by her incompetent husband but being the glue binding her family together; speaks of her mental fortitude. Infanticide aside, she is one of the most morally rigid, duty-bound characters. She’s also a good mother to Jessica who definitely had the happiest upbringing out of all her cousins.
Eva is not an entirely a villainous character. She was given a lot of shit for not subscribing to subservient female gender roles in a traditional, patriarchal family. But her pushing her ambitions onto her son make her a toxic, tiger parent. Forking out a fortune to give George regimental lessons that he feels apathy and dread for is a relatable experience of children with overbearing parents. Micromanaging his schedule, keeping a vigilant eye on his grades and taking action on every disparaging comment made at parent-teacher conferences are all astute observations made by Ryukishi07. But Eva is redeemed at the end as she truly loves and cares for Ange, which is more than I can say for the other two mothers.
Rosa is a selfish bitch but one of the most layered, well-written characters in Umineko. Children learn from and copy their parents. Rosa perpetuated her father’s cycle of abuse by mimicking the way he would discipline her as a child. She became an abuser through instinctually copying behaviours that were her norm - such as her father frequently losing his temper and striking her and her older siblings bullying her. And any instances of her being a good and affectionate mother were to receive external validation and not for the genuine wellbeing of her child.
And Kyrie is a sociopath. She initially comes across as likeable when she’s helping Battler with his logic puzzles but she’s mostly façade. Sociopaths learn behaviours to get what they want and she needed to play the part of a loving mother and wife to keep Rudolf. In actuality, she sees all people as disposable. That’s why she’s able to coldly and calmly massacre everyone.
Favourite battles in the series?
Of course, episode 8 is endgame. Therefore, I really liked what the combined effort of all the family members and the fantasy creatures in the penultimate battle symbolised. The preservation of the Golden Land from the goats and Pirate Erika made me genuinely emotional as did Lamdadelta’s swan song.
I also really loved George and Jessica’s love trials in episode 6. However, the fights did not steal the spotlight, the conversations between the adults and children did. Eva and George’s relationship got a lot more fleshed out and I was especially riveted by Jessica and Kyrie’s conversation which was a very underrated moment. Kyrie scarring her niece with her life story is in the contention for one of the best moments in the VN.
And they’re not physical battles but the sequences between Battler and Erika leading up to the climaxes of episode 5 and 6 were amazing.
Some funny theories I came up with while reading (I look back at these and laugh so hard)
- I am very naïve so I thought that Kuwadorian Beatrice was conceived via cloning technology lol. Kinzo put money into scientific research that was ahead of its time to extract DNA from the first Beatrice to inject into stem cells to clone another Beatrice. The truth was a LOT more terrible and horrible than I could ever imagine.
- Battler and I seem to share the same idiotic braincells because I came up with my own small bombs theory. But unlike Battler’s assertion that the family were fed the bombs by Gohda, I thought the gold butterflies were simply ‘magic vision’ for microchips that would be attached to the victims then detonated. HAHAHA.
- I once thought that Battler was the man from ‘nineteen years ago’. I know this theory falls apart the more you get into episode 5, but I did consider this when Beatrice confirmed that Asumu was not his biological mother. I thought that Rudolf knocked up some woman and did some baby switching. I guess that turned out to be partly true.
What were your thought processes solving the mysteries? What did you get right?
I always thought that it was unlikely for the twilights to be carried by one person. There’s just too many variables for one person to control, (even if Claire did say that she had to leave the roulette up to fate). I knew that accomplices had to corroborate false testimony to make it seem like a 19th person or a ‘witch’ was the culprit. And many murders doubled down on false testimony by showing supernatural elements as the direct cause of the murder. It was always the servants and Nanjo citing supernatural elements as the cause; as well as everyone corroborating supernatural phenomena in episode 4 (that was the most confusing one to decipher and really threw me off). But hey, with gold ingots you could bribe anyone. Furthermore, the Red Truth has some wiggle room. For instance, I always thought that Kanon’s deaths were dodgy due to a lack of a body. I mean it’s “no body, no crime” and the lack of a corpse means that Nanjo couldn’t check for sure if he’s dead. And if Nanjo is an accomplice then who is to say that he wasn't faking testimony of a bunch of corpses actually being dead. So I got a sense the crimes were committed by accomplices doubling down on fake testimony. I wasn't sure of the nitty-gritty details of the ‘how’ (I wish I thought more about that), but as I said, I felt apathy towards the ‘how’ and wanted to know the ‘why’ most of all.
I knew that Shannon and Kanon were in on it together at least. They always seemed bound together as far as their fates are concerned (both wishing for love as ‘furniture’). So if I was right in suspecting them as culprits or accomplices, then their quest for love must be a key motivation. After all, they kept talking about wanting to bring their loved ones to the Golden Land where everyone would give their blessings. But what sealed the deal was that in episode 4 they shared a conversation about the previous games. Now if I was smarter and paid more attention, I could've connected them to Beatrice instantly. Only the game master and everyone in purgatorio should have memories and not the resettable pieces on the gameboard. But still, the ‘why’ wasn't satisfactory for me. I understand maybe wanting to kill Eva and Natsuhi because both women would’ve forbid their children from dating servants but everybody? Even their beloveds George and Jessica and innocents like Maria? I did read ‘Confessions of the Golden Witch’ in the manga and so now I understand, but that did stump me. I did however pick up on what Battler’s sin was. I thought about what he did six years ago. And besides leaving the family register (which Beatrice confirmed was not the answer she was looking for), that left his cringey promise to come for Shannon on a white horse. But at the time that ‘why’ wasn't satisfactory to me because even if she hated him for that, why kill his entire family? I mean yeah, you can add Rudolf to the hit list for making Battler leave the family but still.
But no, I was dumb and didn’t connect Shannon and Kanon to Beatrice until episode 6. The topic of furniture was brought up again which was another puzzle that had me stumped. I had previously thought it was a derogatory term meaning sub-human but those love demons confirmed that sub-human meant incest. So Shannon or Kanon committed incest somehow. Would that mean they’re actually related to George and Jessica? So are they really orphans or was that meant to cover something else? Kinzo has always been a shady guy anyway. And seeing him hanging around the child-like Kuwadorian Beatrice always gave me the ick. But yeah, by the end of episode 6 I concluded that Shannon, Kanon and Beatrice were incomplete souls or ‘illusions’ that you could not physically love. I thought that the culprit could have dissociative identity disorder (DID) but it was more likely they had something similar to Maria where they maladaptively daydreamed to make each of their personas feel very distinct. I think Battler shut down the idea that Maria had DID anyway.
Overall, I think Umineko taught me how to be a more flexible thinker. I remember feeling proud for solving the cheese riddle in episode 6. And I managed to solve Bernkastel’s game in episode 8 pretty quickly. I knew as soon as she said her red truth after the second twilight, the culprit/s pretended to be dead among the first twilight’s victims and must've had an accomplice to carry out the rest of the murders. And the Halloween quiz tournament in episode 8 was also a ton of fun.
What are some criticisms or things I’d change?
I don’t know if there’s a whole lot I’d change or criticise Umineko for. It’s a very well-thought out story that got progressively better the more I read. But I guess if I have to be nit-picky:
In the end, Umineko focused more on the ‘why’ as supposed to the ‘who’ and ‘how’ so I wished it didn’t get so bogged down in the nitty-gritty of the ‘how’ during Battler and Beatrice’s debates. I don’t know how these scenes will reread with the knowledge that the tools of murder weren’t as sophisticated as Battler speculated.
I also wasn't in love with how Battler acted in the middle of episode 6. I thought he was needlesly cruel to Beatrice that it seemed out of character. I know she's not the Beatrice he knows but it was still hard to read through.
And as much as I’m a stan of episode 8 and Ange, I thought it was an odd choice that she wakes up in the Golden Land after reading the book of truth. I thought that after being plunged into oblivion, the implications for Ange’s character would be darker. But I’m happy with what we got in the end so it’s a minor issue.
Concerning the subject of the manga vs the VN, I prefer the VN’s version that points to the existence of more than one truth. I think it is the better creative choice. The only knock against the manga’s adaptation of episode 8 is that it only points to one truth. But besides that, the manga’s adaptation of episode 8 is amazing and enhances the story quite a bit with extra scenes that give everything more context.
What are your takeaway messages from the story?
- Don’t be a slave to your past, it’s better to turn to the future.
- But also don’t be too fatalistic or fixated on what or will happen. You have to trust that people will have the ability and empathy to understand.
- The truth can be undesirable and shouldn't always be aspired to.
- Some parents shouldn't have children. Better to break the cycle of abuse. Umineko may also have the best representation of maladaptive daydreaming I’ve seen.
- The past should be allowed to rest in peace. The dehumanisation and manipulation of the ‘gameboard pieces’ to satiate the public's amusement is whack. It’s important to preserve enigma of the ‘cat box’ by keeping the lid shut.
- There’s also probably a lot of ontological stuff about the mystery genre that went over my head. Perhaps more background reading will help me appreciate Umineko’s unorthodox mystery more. The only Agatha Christie story I’ve experienced is the Murder on the Orient Express film.
- And most importantly of all: ‘without love it cannot be seen’ 🙂
2024.04.08 03:32 SickDudeLmao4 Don't make a deal with a demon. You might get what you asked for.
Hello!
I am a man of many interests, mainly history and anthropology, but recently I was drawn to the darker stuff, you know?
So I went into the rabbithole of demonology, cultts etc. I didn't really believe in it, still don't know if I do, but when I told a pal of mine he contacted an old friend of his, who claimed to have had a real and vivid experience witth a demon.
I thought you guys might like that, so I asked her if I could share it here. She agreed! So here it is:
It had been a lush summer day, the purple clouds cutting through the serene blue- yellowish sky. My mum had helped me unload the sleeping bag and the rucksack with spare clothes, toothbrush, snacks etc.
Before we went to the door, she hugged me, which made me feel a wee bit uncomfortable. I was 14, for christs sake, not a child, so i pushed her away. She wasnt angry, I guess she knew that´s how teenagers are.
Today, I wish I had hugged her longer. No, I wish she had stayed firm and hadn´t allowed me to go.
I wasn't allowed at the beginning, but when she heard Dad would "work longer" because he "had to finish the project", she suddenly decided I would be allowed to go. He had finished the project weeks ago. He had told us.
He really was going to the Pub. Something I knew, something she knew, and, I´m sure of it, something he knew we knew.
I guess that, just for once, she didnt want me to hear the screams, the endless arguments, the sobbing... seeing her standing in the bathroom, telling me it was fine, that she had fallen, that I should go into my room, or, when dad hadn't been at the casino, to the mall.
We rung the doorbell, and a lanky man in business clothes opened the door. The round small glasses made him look like a teacher.
"Ah, look who it is, lil Amber. God, youve grown!"
Me: "Hey, Mr Burg!"
Mr Burg: "Come on, go inside, they're in the basement. "
I went past him, torwards the door behind the stairs. I was always astonished by how neat and clean their house was. Mrs Burg was a bit of a typical surburban mum, always in cool dresses and with styled hair. I guess they had the money. Not that we weror unkempt, but it was like the whole house radiated... peace.
Yes, that´s it. It felt peaceful.
I heard Mr Burg and my mum talk, but didnt pay it much attention. Typical parent-talk. "How are you, i´ll get her at this and this time, blah blah blah."
I walked down the wooden stairs into the basement. It wasn't like a typical basement, more like a hobby room. There was a bar (whose contents were denied to us with the help of a VERY big lock), darts, a billard table and a couch.
My friends things and sleeping bags where sprawled across the floor, as the sound of music and the smell of bubble gum flavoured smoke hit my senses.
Kelly had gotten a Vape for her birthday.
And there they were, my friends. Jasmin, whose parents house we were at, Kelly, and Selin.
"Amb!" it echoed through the basement. They got up and hugged me.
"Whats up, guys?" I asked.
Jasmin:" Oh, alls good, alls good. Just that Mr. Strict locked the booze."
Me:"I mean, i guess that makes sense, we shouldn't dri-"
Jasmin:" Oh no, not you, too! Didn't even allow us a few beers. Hes such a jerk."
That was Jamin for you. Dont get me wrong, I didnt have anything against a good time, but I understood where he was coming from. I didn't try to give any contra, didn't care too much in the end.
I went over to Kelly, who had cut her hair short into a Pixie Cut.
Me:"Oh, look at you! Looking good."
Kelly:" Awww, thanks. My mum hates it, though. "
Me:" Don´t let her tell you how too dress or style! You have to be comfortable with it, not her."
The others agreed. Kelly seemed to truly aprecciate the encouraging words. I lay down my stuff, sprawled out my sleeping bag and placed the snacks in the middle of our "camp" with the others.
Kelly:" You hear, Selins got a boyfriend now!"
Me and Jasmin:" Ohhhhhhhhh."
Selin:" You promised not to tell, you bitch!" she said laughing, hitting Kelly jokingly.
Jasmin:" About time! Come on, tell us! Who is it?"
Selin:" Ugh... Jason Ferguson."
Jasmin and Me answered at the same time :"Jason Ferguson?"
Jasmin:" The guy with the Dirt Bike?"
Selin:" Yeah."
Me:" Why him?"
Selin:" I dont know.. hes nice... and kind..." She smiled sheepishlly while talking about him.
Jasmin:" When do you bring your first guy home, Amb?"
I was a bit taken aback by that. It was true, I was the only one of our group without a boyfriend now. I suppose I just wasn't eady yet. And to be honest, that scared me. It made me feel like the world was advancing and I couldn't keep up. I had had something akin to romance in my life before, but that was nothing serious. Teen stuff, you know. A card at valentines day, sending heart emojis, but nothing that I or anyone else for that matter, would consider a relationship.
Kelly:" Oh, leave her alone; Jasmin, haha."
Jasmin:" What? Im just asking questions!"
I sat between them, emberassed, not knowing how to answer. So I didn't. Once she realized she hit a nerve, she backed down.
Jasmin:" I'm sorry, Amb. You know I didn't mean it like that."
She smiled at me. And, once again, that was Jasmin for you. She wasn't cruel, just a bratty, but who wasn't from time to time at that age?
Jasmin:" And, anyway, after tonight, who knows? Maybe all our dreams will come true?"
As she said that, we all grew a bit more serious, but also... excited. I had almost forgotten. But it wasn't time for that yet, Jasmins parents were still awake and we wanted to wait till they were asleep.
So we took turns vaping, drinking soda, eating snacks, and shittalking people at our school. In a way, it felt like being a kid again.
Jasmin dad came down and told us they´d go to sleep now, to not make too much of a ruckus, but also not too little, wished us a good night and ascended the stairs.
Selin:" Your dad's nice."
Kelly:" Yeah, i like him, too."
Jasmin:" Uh huh."
I knew Jasmin. She seemed weirdly dismissive, but may be she was just angry over the booze thing. I didn't question it.
And once we didn't hear anything from them, Jasmin opened the bag, with 4 candles, a tattered suit. and chalk inside. To be honest, when I saw the stuff, I grew a bit scared. This thing I only knew from stupid horror movies suddenly became more... real, you know? I mean, I didnt't believe in it, not really, but I guess many of us wouldn't use a Ouija Board because... what if?
What if, for any reason, it worked? But as I said, I didn't really believe in it, and I wasn't going to be the one to chicken out.
We placed the lit candles in a square, one in front of each of us, and Jasmin, who had found the ritual online, drew the smybols on the suit and placed it in the middle. She then said something in some weird language, really unenthusiastically, and waited.
And at first, nothing happened. And then it was like the color drained from the world. The flames at the circle began to flare up, discolouring from green to purple to blue, as did the chalk on the suit.
Dark laughter and tortured moans filled our ears, and we all crawled back, as bone and flesh and sinew and skin begin to violently twist and break and creak within the old suit.
The flesh began to form into a crude mockery of a human being, the eye sockets and mouth hollow, as it writhed and blue flames sporadically errupted from the whirlwinds of sharp bones and muscles making it up.
Then skin formed around its broken body, followed by hair, and the rest of it clothes.
And in front of us... stood a man.
He was tall and lanky, with brown short hair and sharp features, his equally sharp teeth forming a smile, with his eyes laughing at us. Mocking us.
The old suit was now impecable, made of some fine brown-blackish material, neddle
stripes and all, weird occult symbols adorning it at the sleeves and the neck and buttons.
His pants were normal, but his shoes seemed to be made of some sort of reptile leather, with bronze or gold at the tips, shaped like skulls.
He turned around a few time, looking at each of us, and I could tell that the others were just as dumbfounded as I was.
He threw his arms to the side and then put his hand on his hips, as if to say "So, Im here. What now?"
Jasmin:" Uh... hello?"
As she answered he quickly turned around, startling her.
Guy: "Oh, hello, darling!"
Jasmin:" Wh.... uh... who are you?"
Guy:" "You tell me! You summoned me, after all!"
Jasmin:" Ugh, ah, yeah, I guess. Guys....?"
Kelly:" Are you... a demon?"
Guy:" Depends on your definition!"
Selin:" Our defintion... of a... demon?"
Guy:" Yes!"
Now our initial shock was replaced by... annoyance?As weird as it sounds, his refusal to give straight answers was frustrating.
Me:" Uh... will you hurt us?"
Guy:" Depends on your definition, hahaha. No, no, I'm just kidding. "
Every move he made was like that of some actor, or maybe a ring leader. Like he was a comedian on stage.
Jasmin:" So... you´re... no demon?"
Guy:" Oh, no... I am."
As he said that, his iris flaired up with blew flame and the air in the room grew ... heavier.
Demon:" Just not of hell, I suppose. Heaven and Hell are real, this wanna-be just thinks he can lay claim to worlds because hes stronger than us! Im beyond heaven and hell, my dear friends. This Lovecraft Guy had some good ideas about it, though I suspect some ofmy... friends... had a hand in his creative endeavours!"
We all looked at each other. These were two bomb shells at once.
Me:" Heaven and Hell... are real? You´re joking."
Demon:" Im a demon, floating in front of you. You tell me if I'm joking."
He had a point.
Kelly:" So if heaven is real..."
As Kelly started to speak, he frowned, and again, the whole room grew heavier, and his form grew slightly off. As if something was writhing underneath his skin.
Me:" Listen..." he said with annoyed undertone. "Im not here to answer your dumb questions. You are meat puppets, there are things that are not. Comprende?"
We nodded.
Demon:" So, are we going to make a deal or what?"
As he asked the question, I got goosebumbs. Did he know, or did he just infer it?
Jasmin:" Actually...."
Selin:" We did... want to make one. Well, hehe, we didnt think it would work, really."
He answered with a sharp grin:" No one ever does."
Kelly:" What... will it cost us?"
Demon:" Depends on what you want."
Jasmin:" We want... to be all powerful. To be all powerful, rich, beautfiul, bend reality to our will..."
Demon:" Uh huh, uh huh, yeah." he nodded along, sarcastically.
Jasmin:" What? Are you too weak to pull it off?"
Jasmin looked at him defyingly, making the rest of us rather nervous. Provoking a demon didn't seem like a good idea.
She kept prvoking him, as he stared at her with the most unimpressed look someone could muster. As she did, he made a gesture, and a cigar appeared in his hand, which he lighted with a fire he spawned at the tip of his thumb. He puffed out a cloud of smoke, which took the form of skulls with horns.
I wondered if the... otherworldy and the human experience really were so similar, or if he did these weird little hints and gestures because we were human.
Demon:" Me? Too weak? Nonono. But you? You are."
Kelly:" Wh... what do you mean?"
Demon:" What do you have to give? 4 teenagers in their parents house, 4 puny little souls, and you want the world? Ha!"
He stopped floating and knelt down in front of Jasmin, then moved his face close to hers.
Demon:" You are small, little things. So... start small."
He rose to his feet again, and we started to ponder. What could he gives us, and... what would we have to pay down the line?
Selin:" Ok, uhm... what can we give you?"
Me:" Yeah, what do you want?"
Demon:" A bit of a clisheé, I know, but I deal in souls."
I became scared as he said that, even a bit offended. Our souls. Our innermost self? The thing that made us.... us?
Me:" We're not gonna give you our souls!"
Jasmin:" Yeah, screw that!"
He shrugged.
Demon:" Doesn't have to be yours. Those who are free for you to give are fine as well. Those directly dependent on you, your workers, the people who live on your land, servants, slaves... "
He counted up a bunch of possible relationships, and then he smiled devilishly as he came down to the last one:
"... your loved ones."
That was even worse. The people we love, who we trusted and who trusted us? To feed them to this... thing?
We were silent for a second, then Jasmin, to my shock, said something I never expected.
Jasmin:" My dad."
Every head turned torwards her.
Demon:" Oh, thats perfect!"
" Jasmin?" Kelly asked in a hushed tone.
Jasmin:" What? Fuck that piece of shit! He's cheating on my mum! She just walks around the house all day on painkillers with that fucking smile, like a fucking ghost!"
Kelly slumped down a bit as she heard that, her initial protest vanished. Maybe her life wasn't as good and perfect as the initial impression made it seem.
Demon:" Yes, yes, a cheater. A dirtbag who goes around fucking his secretary,then comes home and plays house! Oh yes, thats perfect!"
As the demon recounted the situation in such a vulgar manner, Jasmin winced, and to be honest, it hurt me a little bit, too.
We moved over to her, and tried to console her. As we did, patting her shoulder and telling her it's alright, he pointed at me.
Demon:" What about you? What about... daddy?"
I was surprised by being singled out that way. I looked away, fearing he'd Show everyone my families dirty laundry.
Demon:" Some dirty little drunk, who gambles away the money that should go to you and your mum. A strong woman who works two jobs tp support you, so utterly grinded down when he comes home and whacks in her teeth! What a pathetic sight when your poor mum lies over the toilet bowl, puking her wretched little guts out from crying so much. But the worst thing? Sometimes, hehehe, sometimes, you despise her more than him, for not leaving, for not standing up!"
He was now overjoyed with glee, almost doing a little dance of excitement as he recounted the details of my life.
My thoughts raced, but laid out like that... he did make sense. I wanted him gone so often, sometimes, in my darkest, most private moments, when I walked into the living room with him passed out on the couch.... how easy it would be to... but then I didn't. I thought that I was better than that. But now I realized... it wasn't virtue that stopped me... it was cowardice. So as... as this devil whispered into my ear, I... couldn't help myself. I agreed.
Me: "Won't we be caught?"
Demon: " No! Thats a guarantee, my darlings. They will be goners, and you... hmmm.... how does eternal beauty sound like?"
Eternal beauty? What 14 year old girl wouldn't dream of that? In retrospect, none of us were really ugly, but to us, with our hormone ridden insecruities, it did sound like a dream come true. None of us answered, so the demon pointed at Selin.
Demon:" What about... hmm... .mummy?"
Selin:" What? No! I love my mum!"
Demon:" These two love their dads, even if they wouldn't admit it. That's the whole point."
He was right. Even if he was a drunk, a bastard who beat my mum, I couldn't deny it. He was still my dad.
He was the man who carried me on his shoulders at the zoo, who taught me how to ride a bike, who called me "treasure", though I cringed at it since I´d turned 11. Maybe thats why it hurt even more when he did what he did when he was drunk.
I kept listening as he continued to berate Selin.
Demon:" You love her, you do. But... maybe exactly because you love her... wouldn't it be a mercy to... release her? The cancer in her chest has already spread, it's eating her alive. Let me tell ya, I've seen Ghouls in the 8th dimension looking healthier!"
Selin:" Don't talk about her that way!"
He slung his arms around her as tears formed in her eye.
Demon:" Selin, Darling, lets be real here. How often have you heard her say, when she thought you weren't there, or when she thought you had music running in your... very fashionable headphones, by the way, good tatste, dear.... how often did you hear her say that it hurt, that she just wished it´d be all over, that even a rabid dog would get the bullet. And how often did you hear that she's doing it all... for you? For you, her shining star. That all the pain would be worth it if she could see you graduate, go to prom, in a beautful dress. Don't you think it's time to... give her something back?"
We all were in tears now, but Selin the most. She was a mess... and then nodded.
He looked at her calmly, then pattet her shoulder and said:" You're a good person."
He unslinged his arm from around her shoulder, like a Boa constrictor realising all life had gone from it´s prey.
Then he looked at Kelly. We all were defeated at that point, we vdidn't even try to dissuade her from whatever he offered her.
We were in, and odds were, she would be in, too.
Kelly:" I, uh... leave me alone." she closed her eyes shut, kneeling against the wall.
He plunged himself next to her, like a social worker who tries to be cool, to get on her level, like he was trying to tell her drugs were bad. Though he would probably encourage it and then sell them to her at a two for one discount.
Demon:" Keeelllyyyy.~.. what´s wrong , dear?" Kelly:" I won't.... i won't-"
Demon:" Why? Why can't she just accept you like you are? So what if you like girls?"
We looked at her.
Jasmin:" We thought you had a boyfriend?"
Selin:" Yeah!"
Kelly:" Mum made me say he was so noone would think I´m... a "freak." "
Demon:" Dear little Kelly, my poor little freak. She's responsible for those, isn't she?"
He pulled up her sleeve, revealing a row of scars.
She pulled it back down, then she looked at us. We didn't say anything to her
You know, I wish that we had. She now knows I accepted her, but maybe if I had said something right then and there, told her it was alright, maybe she wouldn't have felt the need to go through with it like we did.
Demon:" Therapy... yelling, screaming, convertion camp. Sometimes shes so kind and nice, treating you like you are her one and all, taking you to the mall, to the park... thoseare days she can convince herself you aren't what she knows you are. "
Kelly:" Shut up, please... just shut up..."
Demon:" And the worst thing is... shes right, isn't she? I´m the proof... heaven and hell are real, and you don't know that everything that goes along with it, in her faith, in your faith, is too."
Kelly looks at him, waiting for an answer, waiting for the confirmation she will go to hell
Demon:" Heh , I won´t either. But it also doesn't matter. Just say yes... say yes to me, embrace my power.... I hand them to you, dear. I will give you power, power beyond heaven and hell, beyond judgement. You will be beautiful, free to do as you wish, free from this feeling of the divine around the corner , only waiting for your heart to stop, waiting for the abyss to swallow you."
Only a faint "yes" could be heard from behind her knees, her tears soaking her pyjamas.
"Great." he said as he jumped to his feet, knocking his feet together in a jovial manner.
Demon:" Ok, heres the deal. I will give you beauty, use that to gain more influence and power. Once you have that, you can call me again, we'll hash out the details, and you get something even better! Understood? Wonderful!"
He extended his hand, and a blue flame errupted from his palm, engulfing it whole.
Demon:" Come on, go on, it won't hurt."
Jasmin went first, a bit hesitant.
Jasmin:" He's right, it doesn't."
Selin and me followed, as did Kelly, her face red and puffy.
The demon smiled while shaking our hands, and after a few seconds, the flame went out.
Jasmin:" Did it work?"
Demon:" Sure did, Sweetie."
As the demon said so, we heard steps coming from above, and a voice calling down the stairs. "Girls?"
Jasmin:" Dad? Don't tell me..."
Demon;:" Enjoy the show."
Jasmin:" No, no, no, i dont want to s..."
Mr Burg walked down the stiars, his business attire exchanged for a white T- shirt and jogging pants.
Mr Burg:" Hey, sorry to interrupt, girls! I just got hungry and wanted to go get a midnight snack! You want anything..."
We all looked at the Demon, and then at Mr Burg.
Demon:" Don't worry, he can't see me."
Mr Burg seemed a bit weirded out by our attitude.
Mr Burg:" Everythings alright? You guys look like you've seen a ghost!"
At this question, Selin began to gasp for air, and cry, as the demons laughter began to fill the room.
Mr Burg seemed startled, so he stepped forward: "Hey, everythings good? Sorry, Selin, i didn't mean to..."
He turned to Jasmin and me, and whispered: " ...with her mother and all, poor girl. I didn't mean it."
Jasmin:" Now you're sorry?"
Mr Burg:" Hey hey hey, what's this all about?"
Jasmin:" Well, you can apologize to others, that comes easy to you, huh? But then just lie to your own wife and daughter; you.... fucking cheater!"
Jasmin exploded. I understood her. reaction. If I had been her, in front of my father, in that situation, I don't know if I could have kept it together, too. Why was this man, why were all our parents, less sensible to our feelings than a literal demon? He mocked us, yeah, he was cruel, yes, but what he said just hit the core of what troubled us., you know?
Between this feeling of impending doom, the demons laughter, the crying, the guilt, the excitement, who hadn't lost their cool?
Mr Burg went through a variation of emotions on the spot. I could tell. Surprise, shock, emberassment, anger... a deep seated, almost hateful, white burning anger... understanding.
He moved his hand through his hair, and then looked at his daughter the most empethatic and understanding way a man could muster, I think.
Mr Burg:" You... of course you know..."
Jasmin cried out:" Yes, i fucking know! Of course I fucking know!? Look at you! Gleaming every fucking day while mum wastes away! You think I couldn't tell?"
Mr Burg:" Your mum knows... we tried to keep it away from you."
Jasmin:" Well, you aren't fucking subtle!"
Mr Burg looked like he wanted to yell at her. Like a father who doesn't tolerate his child speaking to him in such a manner. But he didn't.
She was right.
He was wrong.
And he knew it.
Mr Burg:" Listen... Jasmin... " he paused, contemplating his next words very carefully:
"... I... fucked up. I fucked up and theres no correcting my mistake. Me and your mum... we.... no, I won't talk about your mum. She should tell you yourself. All I want you to know is that, we love you, I love you, and we'll ... I'm sorry, dear."
Anger was written across Jasmins face, but I think I also saw contemplation and fondness behind the anger and tears.
Jasmin:"Im sorry, too, dad. "
Mr Burg:" You don't need to apologize for any-"
Mr Burgs warm smile faded instantly. He got up from his knees, and looked around.
Mr Burg:" Why is it so hot in here? "
We all were taken aback by that. We suspected it was the demons doing, I think, but the way he changed from this regretful father to this annoyed, uncomfortable dude was weird none the less.
He walked to the heater next to the stairs and touched it.
Mr Burg:" Hm, no, normal. Jeez, why is it so hot in here? Aren't you guys hot?"
We shook our heads. I guess we just waited for it to happen. We could've warned him, told him, but I felt like it wouldn't have done anything. Also, like it wasn't our place to tell him. This was Jasmins deal. It also still felt like a dream, like it wasn't real. The true weight of our decision hadn't dawned one me, yet.
Mr. Burg began to grow more erratic, searching for the source of this "heat.", his white shirt growing dark around his neck and arm pits.
Mr, Burg:" God damn it, why is it... .you guys don't feel it? Why is it so hot?"
Jasmin:" D-dad."
Mr Burg:" Shut the fuck up darling, im fucking hot, oh, im sorry dear, its just so fucking FUCK-"
He ran past us, throwing up our bags and snacks, desperately searching for the source of the heat he claimed to feel.
Jasmin tried to stop him, but he pushed her out of the way.
Jasmin:" Dad!"
Mr Burg looked at her, his small glasses half off his face, his hair dishhevelled. For one second he looked regretful, and then just continued searching.
Jasmin stood up, and grabbed the demons arm.
Jasmin:" Stop it, stop it! I take the deal back, fuck it, I give you my soul, whatever it is you're doing-"
Demon:" No taksie backsies... this is happening!"
As he said so, a bag of popcorn appeared in his hand and these blue and red 3D-Glasses on his head. She let him go and walked up to her dad, and as she did, he stopped searching. He stood with his face to the wall, then turned around, a small smile on his face.
He walked to the beginning of the stairs, while Jasmin tried to stop him. "Dad... sto-- DAD!"
Mr Burg:" Please let go of me, dear."
Jasmin did as he said, then asked: " Are you better now?"
He smiled at her, then just... opened his mouth. He looked like his brain went to stand-by. He... made a weird noise, a small moan escaping his mouth, drool pooling up at his feet.
Jasmin moved her hand to hold his.
Jasmin:" Dad?"
Mr Burg immediately went up in flames. Instantly. Starting at his center, engulfing his body in a second. The heat hitting our bodies was bad, the smell was worse. I ran up to Jasmin and pulled her into a corner with the others, while Mr Burg screamed, flailing his arms around.
I dont know how long it took or him to stop. Could´ve been a minute, could´ve been 10. But as instantly as the fire had started, as instantly it stopped, leaving only behind a... perfectly shaped,black, human silouhette burned into the carpet... and a wedding ring at the silouhettes left hand.
We all were in shock. Jasmin, of course, the worst. I held her and patted her head while she shaked forth and back in my arms. I had closed my eyes for the most part, but not my ears. Mr Burgs shrill screams still echo in my head from time to time. As does the laughter. This unhinged, carefree, amused laughter.
You know.... I think it would've been enough. I mean, of course it was. Or maybe not, now that i think about it. Maybe we deserved it. But either way, the demon walked up to us one last time, and decided to mock us.
Demon:" Amber, your dad just had a broken off bar stool rammed up into his brain through his nose by a bunch of loan sharks.
Kelly, your mum just had a horrifying car crash. Her face was ripped off, now decorating a stop sign. She bled out, while her organs spilled out on the fucking asphalt.
And Selin... hahaha... no... hahaha, how terrible, what the fuck.... haha. ... no no no hahaha.... she just got cut up by a stalker who snuck into her hospital room hahaha no, how awful hahaha."
He wiped a tear from his eye.
Demon:" Anyway... Deals fulfilled. See ya!"
He disappeared into blue flame. And that was that.
Maybe we could've done, should've done something. Call our parents, call Mrs Burg, find a way to... I don't know.... reverse the spell? But we didn't... we just curled up, and... slept.
The next day, I was greeted by a black stain in the carpet, and the 3 most beautiful faces I had ever seen.
Mrs Burg came down to wake us, scolding us for staining the carpet and using her make up. The police arrived soon after, telling us of our parents demise. We knew already, of course. But it still stung. Mrs. Burg found out her husband was dead soon after. I don't know what Jasmin exactly told her. I didn't ask. All I know is she would sometimes speak up at community meetings or the church, rambling on about the dangers of "spontaneous combustion."
Kelly moved to relatives nearby after her mum had died. They didn't judge her for her love life, she said she lost that fear of damnation... for that. But gained many, many others.
Selin broke off contact after what happened. Walked out of the Burg's house and.... that was it.
What about me, you ask?
Well, life became easier in some ways, that's true. Boys ran in the doors for us, we became popular.
Mum had a breakdown after what happened. She would always tell me that she only loved him. That he was a saint. She isn't any happier than she was before.
What can I say?
Don't make a deal with a demon. You might get what you asked for.
submitted by SickDudeLmao4 to nosleep [link] [comments]
I am a man of many interests, mainly history and anthropology, but recently I was drawn to the darker stuff, you know?
So I went into the rabbithole of demonology, cultts etc. I didn't really believe in it, still don't know if I do, but when I told a pal of mine he contacted an old friend of his, who claimed to have had a real and vivid experience witth a demon.
I thought you guys might like that, so I asked her if I could share it here. She agreed! So here it is:
It had been a lush summer day, the purple clouds cutting through the serene blue- yellowish sky. My mum had helped me unload the sleeping bag and the rucksack with spare clothes, toothbrush, snacks etc.
Before we went to the door, she hugged me, which made me feel a wee bit uncomfortable. I was 14, for christs sake, not a child, so i pushed her away. She wasnt angry, I guess she knew that´s how teenagers are.
Today, I wish I had hugged her longer. No, I wish she had stayed firm and hadn´t allowed me to go.
I wasn't allowed at the beginning, but when she heard Dad would "work longer" because he "had to finish the project", she suddenly decided I would be allowed to go. He had finished the project weeks ago. He had told us.
He really was going to the Pub. Something I knew, something she knew, and, I´m sure of it, something he knew we knew.
I guess that, just for once, she didnt want me to hear the screams, the endless arguments, the sobbing... seeing her standing in the bathroom, telling me it was fine, that she had fallen, that I should go into my room, or, when dad hadn't been at the casino, to the mall.
We rung the doorbell, and a lanky man in business clothes opened the door. The round small glasses made him look like a teacher.
"Ah, look who it is, lil Amber. God, youve grown!"
Me: "Hey, Mr Burg!"
Mr Burg: "Come on, go inside, they're in the basement. "
I went past him, torwards the door behind the stairs. I was always astonished by how neat and clean their house was. Mrs Burg was a bit of a typical surburban mum, always in cool dresses and with styled hair. I guess they had the money. Not that we weror unkempt, but it was like the whole house radiated... peace.
Yes, that´s it. It felt peaceful.
I heard Mr Burg and my mum talk, but didnt pay it much attention. Typical parent-talk. "How are you, i´ll get her at this and this time, blah blah blah."
I walked down the wooden stairs into the basement. It wasn't like a typical basement, more like a hobby room. There was a bar (whose contents were denied to us with the help of a VERY big lock), darts, a billard table and a couch.
My friends things and sleeping bags where sprawled across the floor, as the sound of music and the smell of bubble gum flavoured smoke hit my senses.
Kelly had gotten a Vape for her birthday.
And there they were, my friends. Jasmin, whose parents house we were at, Kelly, and Selin.
"Amb!" it echoed through the basement. They got up and hugged me.
"Whats up, guys?" I asked.
Jasmin:" Oh, alls good, alls good. Just that Mr. Strict locked the booze."
Me:"I mean, i guess that makes sense, we shouldn't dri-"
Jasmin:" Oh no, not you, too! Didn't even allow us a few beers. Hes such a jerk."
That was Jamin for you. Dont get me wrong, I didnt have anything against a good time, but I understood where he was coming from. I didn't try to give any contra, didn't care too much in the end.
I went over to Kelly, who had cut her hair short into a Pixie Cut.
Me:"Oh, look at you! Looking good."
Kelly:" Awww, thanks. My mum hates it, though. "
Me:" Don´t let her tell you how too dress or style! You have to be comfortable with it, not her."
The others agreed. Kelly seemed to truly aprecciate the encouraging words. I lay down my stuff, sprawled out my sleeping bag and placed the snacks in the middle of our "camp" with the others.
Kelly:" You hear, Selins got a boyfriend now!"
Me and Jasmin:" Ohhhhhhhhh."
Selin:" You promised not to tell, you bitch!" she said laughing, hitting Kelly jokingly.
Jasmin:" About time! Come on, tell us! Who is it?"
Selin:" Ugh... Jason Ferguson."
Jasmin and Me answered at the same time :"Jason Ferguson?"
Jasmin:" The guy with the Dirt Bike?"
Selin:" Yeah."
Me:" Why him?"
Selin:" I dont know.. hes nice... and kind..." She smiled sheepishlly while talking about him.
Jasmin:" When do you bring your first guy home, Amb?"
I was a bit taken aback by that. It was true, I was the only one of our group without a boyfriend now. I suppose I just wasn't eady yet. And to be honest, that scared me. It made me feel like the world was advancing and I couldn't keep up. I had had something akin to romance in my life before, but that was nothing serious. Teen stuff, you know. A card at valentines day, sending heart emojis, but nothing that I or anyone else for that matter, would consider a relationship.
Kelly:" Oh, leave her alone; Jasmin, haha."
Jasmin:" What? Im just asking questions!"
I sat between them, emberassed, not knowing how to answer. So I didn't. Once she realized she hit a nerve, she backed down.
Jasmin:" I'm sorry, Amb. You know I didn't mean it like that."
She smiled at me. And, once again, that was Jasmin for you. She wasn't cruel, just a bratty, but who wasn't from time to time at that age?
Jasmin:" And, anyway, after tonight, who knows? Maybe all our dreams will come true?"
As she said that, we all grew a bit more serious, but also... excited. I had almost forgotten. But it wasn't time for that yet, Jasmins parents were still awake and we wanted to wait till they were asleep.
So we took turns vaping, drinking soda, eating snacks, and shittalking people at our school. In a way, it felt like being a kid again.
Jasmin dad came down and told us they´d go to sleep now, to not make too much of a ruckus, but also not too little, wished us a good night and ascended the stairs.
Selin:" Your dad's nice."
Kelly:" Yeah, i like him, too."
Jasmin:" Uh huh."
I knew Jasmin. She seemed weirdly dismissive, but may be she was just angry over the booze thing. I didn't question it.
And once we didn't hear anything from them, Jasmin opened the bag, with 4 candles, a tattered suit. and chalk inside. To be honest, when I saw the stuff, I grew a bit scared. This thing I only knew from stupid horror movies suddenly became more... real, you know? I mean, I didnt't believe in it, not really, but I guess many of us wouldn't use a Ouija Board because... what if?
What if, for any reason, it worked? But as I said, I didn't really believe in it, and I wasn't going to be the one to chicken out.
We placed the lit candles in a square, one in front of each of us, and Jasmin, who had found the ritual online, drew the smybols on the suit and placed it in the middle. She then said something in some weird language, really unenthusiastically, and waited.
And at first, nothing happened. And then it was like the color drained from the world. The flames at the circle began to flare up, discolouring from green to purple to blue, as did the chalk on the suit.
Dark laughter and tortured moans filled our ears, and we all crawled back, as bone and flesh and sinew and skin begin to violently twist and break and creak within the old suit.
The flesh began to form into a crude mockery of a human being, the eye sockets and mouth hollow, as it writhed and blue flames sporadically errupted from the whirlwinds of sharp bones and muscles making it up.
Then skin formed around its broken body, followed by hair, and the rest of it clothes.
And in front of us... stood a man.
He was tall and lanky, with brown short hair and sharp features, his equally sharp teeth forming a smile, with his eyes laughing at us. Mocking us.
The old suit was now impecable, made of some fine brown-blackish material, neddle
stripes and all, weird occult symbols adorning it at the sleeves and the neck and buttons.
His pants were normal, but his shoes seemed to be made of some sort of reptile leather, with bronze or gold at the tips, shaped like skulls.
He turned around a few time, looking at each of us, and I could tell that the others were just as dumbfounded as I was.
He threw his arms to the side and then put his hand on his hips, as if to say "So, Im here. What now?"
Jasmin:" Uh... hello?"
As she answered he quickly turned around, startling her.
Guy: "Oh, hello, darling!"
Jasmin:" Wh.... uh... who are you?"
Guy:" "You tell me! You summoned me, after all!"
Jasmin:" Ugh, ah, yeah, I guess. Guys....?"
Kelly:" Are you... a demon?"
Guy:" Depends on your definition!"
Selin:" Our defintion... of a... demon?"
Guy:" Yes!"
Now our initial shock was replaced by... annoyance?As weird as it sounds, his refusal to give straight answers was frustrating.
Me:" Uh... will you hurt us?"
Guy:" Depends on your definition, hahaha. No, no, I'm just kidding. "
Every move he made was like that of some actor, or maybe a ring leader. Like he was a comedian on stage.
Jasmin:" So... you´re... no demon?"
Guy:" Oh, no... I am."
As he said that, his iris flaired up with blew flame and the air in the room grew ... heavier.
Demon:" Just not of hell, I suppose. Heaven and Hell are real, this wanna-be just thinks he can lay claim to worlds because hes stronger than us! Im beyond heaven and hell, my dear friends. This Lovecraft Guy had some good ideas about it, though I suspect some ofmy... friends... had a hand in his creative endeavours!"
We all looked at each other. These were two bomb shells at once.
Me:" Heaven and Hell... are real? You´re joking."
Demon:" Im a demon, floating in front of you. You tell me if I'm joking."
He had a point.
Kelly:" So if heaven is real..."
As Kelly started to speak, he frowned, and again, the whole room grew heavier, and his form grew slightly off. As if something was writhing underneath his skin.
Me:" Listen..." he said with annoyed undertone. "Im not here to answer your dumb questions. You are meat puppets, there are things that are not. Comprende?"
We nodded.
Demon:" So, are we going to make a deal or what?"
As he asked the question, I got goosebumbs. Did he know, or did he just infer it?
Jasmin:" Actually...."
Selin:" We did... want to make one. Well, hehe, we didnt think it would work, really."
He answered with a sharp grin:" No one ever does."
Kelly:" What... will it cost us?"
Demon:" Depends on what you want."
Jasmin:" We want... to be all powerful. To be all powerful, rich, beautfiul, bend reality to our will..."
Demon:" Uh huh, uh huh, yeah." he nodded along, sarcastically.
Jasmin:" What? Are you too weak to pull it off?"
Jasmin looked at him defyingly, making the rest of us rather nervous. Provoking a demon didn't seem like a good idea.
She kept prvoking him, as he stared at her with the most unimpressed look someone could muster. As she did, he made a gesture, and a cigar appeared in his hand, which he lighted with a fire he spawned at the tip of his thumb. He puffed out a cloud of smoke, which took the form of skulls with horns.
I wondered if the... otherworldy and the human experience really were so similar, or if he did these weird little hints and gestures because we were human.
Demon:" Me? Too weak? Nonono. But you? You are."
Kelly:" Wh... what do you mean?"
Demon:" What do you have to give? 4 teenagers in their parents house, 4 puny little souls, and you want the world? Ha!"
He stopped floating and knelt down in front of Jasmin, then moved his face close to hers.
Demon:" You are small, little things. So... start small."
He rose to his feet again, and we started to ponder. What could he gives us, and... what would we have to pay down the line?
Selin:" Ok, uhm... what can we give you?"
Me:" Yeah, what do you want?"
Demon:" A bit of a clisheé, I know, but I deal in souls."
I became scared as he said that, even a bit offended. Our souls. Our innermost self? The thing that made us.... us?
Me:" We're not gonna give you our souls!"
Jasmin:" Yeah, screw that!"
He shrugged.
Demon:" Doesn't have to be yours. Those who are free for you to give are fine as well. Those directly dependent on you, your workers, the people who live on your land, servants, slaves... "
He counted up a bunch of possible relationships, and then he smiled devilishly as he came down to the last one:
"... your loved ones."
That was even worse. The people we love, who we trusted and who trusted us? To feed them to this... thing?
We were silent for a second, then Jasmin, to my shock, said something I never expected.
Jasmin:" My dad."
Every head turned torwards her.
Demon:" Oh, thats perfect!"
" Jasmin?" Kelly asked in a hushed tone.
Jasmin:" What? Fuck that piece of shit! He's cheating on my mum! She just walks around the house all day on painkillers with that fucking smile, like a fucking ghost!"
Kelly slumped down a bit as she heard that, her initial protest vanished. Maybe her life wasn't as good and perfect as the initial impression made it seem.
Demon:" Yes, yes, a cheater. A dirtbag who goes around fucking his secretary,then comes home and plays house! Oh yes, thats perfect!"
As the demon recounted the situation in such a vulgar manner, Jasmin winced, and to be honest, it hurt me a little bit, too.
We moved over to her, and tried to console her. As we did, patting her shoulder and telling her it's alright, he pointed at me.
Demon:" What about you? What about... daddy?"
I was surprised by being singled out that way. I looked away, fearing he'd Show everyone my families dirty laundry.
Demon:" Some dirty little drunk, who gambles away the money that should go to you and your mum. A strong woman who works two jobs tp support you, so utterly grinded down when he comes home and whacks in her teeth! What a pathetic sight when your poor mum lies over the toilet bowl, puking her wretched little guts out from crying so much. But the worst thing? Sometimes, hehehe, sometimes, you despise her more than him, for not leaving, for not standing up!"
He was now overjoyed with glee, almost doing a little dance of excitement as he recounted the details of my life.
My thoughts raced, but laid out like that... he did make sense. I wanted him gone so often, sometimes, in my darkest, most private moments, when I walked into the living room with him passed out on the couch.... how easy it would be to... but then I didn't. I thought that I was better than that. But now I realized... it wasn't virtue that stopped me... it was cowardice. So as... as this devil whispered into my ear, I... couldn't help myself. I agreed.
Me: "Won't we be caught?"
Demon: " No! Thats a guarantee, my darlings. They will be goners, and you... hmmm.... how does eternal beauty sound like?"
Eternal beauty? What 14 year old girl wouldn't dream of that? In retrospect, none of us were really ugly, but to us, with our hormone ridden insecruities, it did sound like a dream come true. None of us answered, so the demon pointed at Selin.
Demon:" What about... hmm... .mummy?"
Selin:" What? No! I love my mum!"
Demon:" These two love their dads, even if they wouldn't admit it. That's the whole point."
He was right. Even if he was a drunk, a bastard who beat my mum, I couldn't deny it. He was still my dad.
He was the man who carried me on his shoulders at the zoo, who taught me how to ride a bike, who called me "treasure", though I cringed at it since I´d turned 11. Maybe thats why it hurt even more when he did what he did when he was drunk.
I kept listening as he continued to berate Selin.
Demon:" You love her, you do. But... maybe exactly because you love her... wouldn't it be a mercy to... release her? The cancer in her chest has already spread, it's eating her alive. Let me tell ya, I've seen Ghouls in the 8th dimension looking healthier!"
Selin:" Don't talk about her that way!"
He slung his arms around her as tears formed in her eye.
Demon:" Selin, Darling, lets be real here. How often have you heard her say, when she thought you weren't there, or when she thought you had music running in your... very fashionable headphones, by the way, good tatste, dear.... how often did you hear her say that it hurt, that she just wished it´d be all over, that even a rabid dog would get the bullet. And how often did you hear that she's doing it all... for you? For you, her shining star. That all the pain would be worth it if she could see you graduate, go to prom, in a beautful dress. Don't you think it's time to... give her something back?"
We all were in tears now, but Selin the most. She was a mess... and then nodded.
He looked at her calmly, then pattet her shoulder and said:" You're a good person."
He unslinged his arm from around her shoulder, like a Boa constrictor realising all life had gone from it´s prey.
Then he looked at Kelly. We all were defeated at that point, we vdidn't even try to dissuade her from whatever he offered her.
We were in, and odds were, she would be in, too.
Kelly:" I, uh... leave me alone." she closed her eyes shut, kneeling against the wall.
He plunged himself next to her, like a social worker who tries to be cool, to get on her level, like he was trying to tell her drugs were bad. Though he would probably encourage it and then sell them to her at a two for one discount.
Demon:" Keeelllyyyy.~.. what´s wrong , dear?" Kelly:" I won't.... i won't-"
Demon:" Why? Why can't she just accept you like you are? So what if you like girls?"
We looked at her.
Jasmin:" We thought you had a boyfriend?"
Selin:" Yeah!"
Kelly:" Mum made me say he was so noone would think I´m... a "freak." "
Demon:" Dear little Kelly, my poor little freak. She's responsible for those, isn't she?"
He pulled up her sleeve, revealing a row of scars.
She pulled it back down, then she looked at us. We didn't say anything to her
You know, I wish that we had. She now knows I accepted her, but maybe if I had said something right then and there, told her it was alright, maybe she wouldn't have felt the need to go through with it like we did.
Demon:" Therapy... yelling, screaming, convertion camp. Sometimes shes so kind and nice, treating you like you are her one and all, taking you to the mall, to the park... thoseare days she can convince herself you aren't what she knows you are. "
Kelly:" Shut up, please... just shut up..."
Demon:" And the worst thing is... shes right, isn't she? I´m the proof... heaven and hell are real, and you don't know that everything that goes along with it, in her faith, in your faith, is too."
Kelly looks at him, waiting for an answer, waiting for the confirmation she will go to hell
Demon:" Heh , I won´t either. But it also doesn't matter. Just say yes... say yes to me, embrace my power.... I hand them to you, dear. I will give you power, power beyond heaven and hell, beyond judgement. You will be beautiful, free to do as you wish, free from this feeling of the divine around the corner , only waiting for your heart to stop, waiting for the abyss to swallow you."
Only a faint "yes" could be heard from behind her knees, her tears soaking her pyjamas.
"Great." he said as he jumped to his feet, knocking his feet together in a jovial manner.
Demon:" Ok, heres the deal. I will give you beauty, use that to gain more influence and power. Once you have that, you can call me again, we'll hash out the details, and you get something even better! Understood? Wonderful!"
He extended his hand, and a blue flame errupted from his palm, engulfing it whole.
Demon:" Come on, go on, it won't hurt."
Jasmin went first, a bit hesitant.
Jasmin:" He's right, it doesn't."
Selin and me followed, as did Kelly, her face red and puffy.
The demon smiled while shaking our hands, and after a few seconds, the flame went out.
Jasmin:" Did it work?"
Demon:" Sure did, Sweetie."
As the demon said so, we heard steps coming from above, and a voice calling down the stairs. "Girls?"
Jasmin:" Dad? Don't tell me..."
Demon;:" Enjoy the show."
Jasmin:" No, no, no, i dont want to s..."
Mr Burg walked down the stiars, his business attire exchanged for a white T- shirt and jogging pants.
Mr Burg:" Hey, sorry to interrupt, girls! I just got hungry and wanted to go get a midnight snack! You want anything..."
We all looked at the Demon, and then at Mr Burg.
Demon:" Don't worry, he can't see me."
Mr Burg seemed a bit weirded out by our attitude.
Mr Burg:" Everythings alright? You guys look like you've seen a ghost!"
At this question, Selin began to gasp for air, and cry, as the demons laughter began to fill the room.
Mr Burg seemed startled, so he stepped forward: "Hey, everythings good? Sorry, Selin, i didn't mean to..."
He turned to Jasmin and me, and whispered: " ...with her mother and all, poor girl. I didn't mean it."
Jasmin:" Now you're sorry?"
Mr Burg:" Hey hey hey, what's this all about?"
Jasmin:" Well, you can apologize to others, that comes easy to you, huh? But then just lie to your own wife and daughter; you.... fucking cheater!"
Jasmin exploded. I understood her. reaction. If I had been her, in front of my father, in that situation, I don't know if I could have kept it together, too. Why was this man, why were all our parents, less sensible to our feelings than a literal demon? He mocked us, yeah, he was cruel, yes, but what he said just hit the core of what troubled us., you know?
Between this feeling of impending doom, the demons laughter, the crying, the guilt, the excitement, who hadn't lost their cool?
Mr Burg went through a variation of emotions on the spot. I could tell. Surprise, shock, emberassment, anger... a deep seated, almost hateful, white burning anger... understanding.
He moved his hand through his hair, and then looked at his daughter the most empethatic and understanding way a man could muster, I think.
Mr Burg:" You... of course you know..."
Jasmin cried out:" Yes, i fucking know! Of course I fucking know!? Look at you! Gleaming every fucking day while mum wastes away! You think I couldn't tell?"
Mr Burg:" Your mum knows... we tried to keep it away from you."
Jasmin:" Well, you aren't fucking subtle!"
Mr Burg looked like he wanted to yell at her. Like a father who doesn't tolerate his child speaking to him in such a manner. But he didn't.
She was right.
He was wrong.
And he knew it.
Mr Burg:" Listen... Jasmin... " he paused, contemplating his next words very carefully:
"... I... fucked up. I fucked up and theres no correcting my mistake. Me and your mum... we.... no, I won't talk about your mum. She should tell you yourself. All I want you to know is that, we love you, I love you, and we'll ... I'm sorry, dear."
Anger was written across Jasmins face, but I think I also saw contemplation and fondness behind the anger and tears.
Jasmin:"Im sorry, too, dad. "
Mr Burg:" You don't need to apologize for any-"
Mr Burgs warm smile faded instantly. He got up from his knees, and looked around.
Mr Burg:" Why is it so hot in here? "
We all were taken aback by that. We suspected it was the demons doing, I think, but the way he changed from this regretful father to this annoyed, uncomfortable dude was weird none the less.
He walked to the heater next to the stairs and touched it.
Mr Burg:" Hm, no, normal. Jeez, why is it so hot in here? Aren't you guys hot?"
We shook our heads. I guess we just waited for it to happen. We could've warned him, told him, but I felt like it wouldn't have done anything. Also, like it wasn't our place to tell him. This was Jasmins deal. It also still felt like a dream, like it wasn't real. The true weight of our decision hadn't dawned one me, yet.
Mr. Burg began to grow more erratic, searching for the source of this "heat.", his white shirt growing dark around his neck and arm pits.
Mr, Burg:" God damn it, why is it... .you guys don't feel it? Why is it so hot?"
Jasmin:" D-dad."
Mr Burg:" Shut the fuck up darling, im fucking hot, oh, im sorry dear, its just so fucking FUCK-"
He ran past us, throwing up our bags and snacks, desperately searching for the source of the heat he claimed to feel.
Jasmin tried to stop him, but he pushed her out of the way.
Jasmin:" Dad!"
Mr Burg looked at her, his small glasses half off his face, his hair dishhevelled. For one second he looked regretful, and then just continued searching.
Jasmin stood up, and grabbed the demons arm.
Jasmin:" Stop it, stop it! I take the deal back, fuck it, I give you my soul, whatever it is you're doing-"
Demon:" No taksie backsies... this is happening!"
As he said so, a bag of popcorn appeared in his hand and these blue and red 3D-Glasses on his head. She let him go and walked up to her dad, and as she did, he stopped searching. He stood with his face to the wall, then turned around, a small smile on his face.
He walked to the beginning of the stairs, while Jasmin tried to stop him. "Dad... sto-- DAD!"
Mr Burg:" Please let go of me, dear."
Jasmin did as he said, then asked: " Are you better now?"
He smiled at her, then just... opened his mouth. He looked like his brain went to stand-by. He... made a weird noise, a small moan escaping his mouth, drool pooling up at his feet.
Jasmin moved her hand to hold his.
Jasmin:" Dad?"
Mr Burg immediately went up in flames. Instantly. Starting at his center, engulfing his body in a second. The heat hitting our bodies was bad, the smell was worse. I ran up to Jasmin and pulled her into a corner with the others, while Mr Burg screamed, flailing his arms around.
I dont know how long it took or him to stop. Could´ve been a minute, could´ve been 10. But as instantly as the fire had started, as instantly it stopped, leaving only behind a... perfectly shaped,black, human silouhette burned into the carpet... and a wedding ring at the silouhettes left hand.
We all were in shock. Jasmin, of course, the worst. I held her and patted her head while she shaked forth and back in my arms. I had closed my eyes for the most part, but not my ears. Mr Burgs shrill screams still echo in my head from time to time. As does the laughter. This unhinged, carefree, amused laughter.
You know.... I think it would've been enough. I mean, of course it was. Or maybe not, now that i think about it. Maybe we deserved it. But either way, the demon walked up to us one last time, and decided to mock us.
Demon:" Amber, your dad just had a broken off bar stool rammed up into his brain through his nose by a bunch of loan sharks.
Kelly, your mum just had a horrifying car crash. Her face was ripped off, now decorating a stop sign. She bled out, while her organs spilled out on the fucking asphalt.
And Selin... hahaha... no... hahaha, how terrible, what the fuck.... haha. ... no no no hahaha.... she just got cut up by a stalker who snuck into her hospital room hahaha no, how awful hahaha."
He wiped a tear from his eye.
Demon:" Anyway... Deals fulfilled. See ya!"
He disappeared into blue flame. And that was that.
Maybe we could've done, should've done something. Call our parents, call Mrs Burg, find a way to... I don't know.... reverse the spell? But we didn't... we just curled up, and... slept.
The next day, I was greeted by a black stain in the carpet, and the 3 most beautiful faces I had ever seen.
Mrs Burg came down to wake us, scolding us for staining the carpet and using her make up. The police arrived soon after, telling us of our parents demise. We knew already, of course. But it still stung. Mrs. Burg found out her husband was dead soon after. I don't know what Jasmin exactly told her. I didn't ask. All I know is she would sometimes speak up at community meetings or the church, rambling on about the dangers of "spontaneous combustion."
Kelly moved to relatives nearby after her mum had died. They didn't judge her for her love life, she said she lost that fear of damnation... for that. But gained many, many others.
Selin broke off contact after what happened. Walked out of the Burg's house and.... that was it.
What about me, you ask?
Well, life became easier in some ways, that's true. Boys ran in the doors for us, we became popular.
Mum had a breakdown after what happened. She would always tell me that she only loved him. That he was a saint. She isn't any happier than she was before.
What can I say?
Don't make a deal with a demon. You might get what you asked for.
2024.04.06 20:59 squidley4 New teacher taking over a 1st grade class for the rest of the school year on Monday. In need of classroom management advice or anything else you got.
Hello group! I am in desperate need of some advice. On Monday, I am taking over a 1st grade classroom for the rest of the school year. Teacher was supposed to go on maternity leave mid-May, but was put on emergency bed rest. With that said, she did not have the opportunity to leave plans so I have been working hard to plan out the rest of the year!
A couple things to note, this is a Title 1 school and this is a very large class (28 students). Most of these students (70%) are still in the red and learning fluency with their letter sounds. These students have had A LOT of inconsistency this year and especially this last week. They had a different sub in their room everyday and were really thrown out of whack. I have about 5 with behavior trackers, and 4 others on IEP’s.
I have subbed in this class a couple times, and it’s basically impossible to teach them whole group just due to the size of the class. I have put together small groups for both reading and math and plan on utilizing rotations! I am lucky enough to have a Para in my room during math to help with rotations and management.
I am feeling good about the content and actual teaching, but where I need advice is classroom management. My plan is to act like Monday is the first day of school, and we will spend all of next week drilling rules and expectations and practicing what transitions, group work, and independent work should look like. This class as whole is very prone to work refusal… I’ll say “alright, time to get out math packets out!” And I receive a collective “NOOOOOOOO” from the whole class… there’s a very negative mindset around doing our work. I hear often that “I don’t need to do math or I don’t need to learn to read” and it breaks my heart.
How do I try to get these young kids out of this mindset and to see the importance of their learning? What are your biggest classroom management tips for a 1st grade classroom? Especially one that has had a lot of inconsistencies and has a handful of “wanderers”. How do I smooth this transition for them while also making my expectations clear and letting them know things will be a little different the rest of the year?
Sorry this was so long and thank you in advance.
submitted by squidley4 to Teachers [link] [comments]
A couple things to note, this is a Title 1 school and this is a very large class (28 students). Most of these students (70%) are still in the red and learning fluency with their letter sounds. These students have had A LOT of inconsistency this year and especially this last week. They had a different sub in their room everyday and were really thrown out of whack. I have about 5 with behavior trackers, and 4 others on IEP’s.
I have subbed in this class a couple times, and it’s basically impossible to teach them whole group just due to the size of the class. I have put together small groups for both reading and math and plan on utilizing rotations! I am lucky enough to have a Para in my room during math to help with rotations and management.
I am feeling good about the content and actual teaching, but where I need advice is classroom management. My plan is to act like Monday is the first day of school, and we will spend all of next week drilling rules and expectations and practicing what transitions, group work, and independent work should look like. This class as whole is very prone to work refusal… I’ll say “alright, time to get out math packets out!” And I receive a collective “NOOOOOOOO” from the whole class… there’s a very negative mindset around doing our work. I hear often that “I don’t need to do math or I don’t need to learn to read” and it breaks my heart.
How do I try to get these young kids out of this mindset and to see the importance of their learning? What are your biggest classroom management tips for a 1st grade classroom? Especially one that has had a lot of inconsistencies and has a handful of “wanderers”. How do I smooth this transition for them while also making my expectations clear and letting them know things will be a little different the rest of the year?
Sorry this was so long and thank you in advance.
2024.04.06 16:41 ewk Just Explain: Measuring Tap 77, Yunmen vs Korea
Case chosen by Xuedou, Instruction by Xuedou, interjection by Yuanwu (), Additional instruction by Yuanwu.
Yuanwu is saying if you YOU PERSONALLY can't explain why Xuedou says hitting, then YOU PERSONALLY haven't studied enough. Saying the monk was an expert puts Yunmen in the wrong, and this is for YOU PERSONALLY to explain. Yuanwu offers the hint that explaining the motive for crossing the sea is already not demonstrating "sea crossing", aka enlightened action.
submitted by ewk to zen [link] [comments]
Case 77- Yunmen and Korea
Yunmen asked a Korean monk, “Where are you from?” (Since you know, why do you ask?) The monk said, “Korea.” (A truthful person is hard to find.) Yunmen said, “How did you cross the sea?” (Only he could.) The monk said, “The brigand is busted.” (This still amounts to a little bit.) Yunmen said, “Why are you in my hands?” (A second ladle comes.) The monk said, “It just so happens.” (This too amounts to a little bit.) Yunmen said, “Go ahead and leap out.” (Too bad.)Instruction by Xuedou
Xuedou said, “The old fellow Yunmen has a dragon’s head but a snake’s tail, letting this monk go. ‘Why are you in my hands?’ (Another case of increasing in wisdom while imprisoned.) ‘It just so happens’—whack him across the back.” (Striking, I say, Not for a moment.)Instruction by Yuanwu
Yuanwu said, Tell me, why hit him? If you say he’s at fault, your eyebrows will fall out. This tests people. This monk was an expert. “How did you cross the sea?” falls into the secondary..
Welcome! ewk comment:Case decode
- Yunmen asks "where the monk is from", this is a triple entendre - what place and what teacheteaching, and what is your essence.
- "Korea" is then at best an incomplete answer
- "how did you cross the sea" is a double entendre question based on a metaphor: how did YOU do it, and how did Bodhidharma do it? The metaphor is "cross the sea" is a metaphor for "bring forth the dharma".
- "brigand is busted" means the monk acknowledges that somebody is trying to steal from somebody... but this acknowledges that both the monk and Yunmen are "stealing" by asking somebody else to provide a teaching... the monk by visiting Yunmen, and Yunmen by asking the monk these questions. Note that Yuanwu says "this too amounts to a little bit", acknowledging that the monk has said something reasonable at last, but it's not enough.
- Yunmen says YOU CAME TO ME. It's a way of proving that both somebody wants something, and that somebody has something.
- When the monk says "coincidence", Yunmen says THEN MAKE ME, which the monk can't do.
Instruction decoded
Xuedou is saying, "too much talking, just whack him for denying reality".Yuanwu is saying if you YOU PERSONALLY can't explain why Xuedou says hitting, then YOU PERSONALLY haven't studied enough. Saying the monk was an expert puts Yunmen in the wrong, and this is for YOU PERSONALLY to explain. Yuanwu offers the hint that explaining the motive for crossing the sea is already not demonstrating "sea crossing", aka enlightened action.
Zen's only practice is public interview
What we are seeing with this Case in Xuedou's giving more instruction on public interviews... this time using fair and reasonable answers as the target for Xuedou's criticism. The monk was actually from Korea. The monk was just so happened to be visiting famous communities. Fair and honest answers. But Zen study requires more than a factual recounting.2024.04.04 19:30 ThrowRA--scootscooti This was assigned to my son in a public school. The class is desktop publishing, 12th grade.
Update: son was finally able to talk to the teacher and she just said he didn’t have to do the assignment. Idk if she’s already checked for the year or realized it’s a whack assignment or what.
EASTER IS HERE!! What is it really all about? YOU are going to create a slide show with slides that cover the following topics. EACH SLIDE MUST HAVE A DIFFERENT BACKGROUND, A PICTURE ABOUT THE MAIN TOPIC, TEXT THAT EXPLAINS THE TOPIC OF THE SLIDE, AND AN APPROPRIATE CLIP ART. Feel free to use animation and colored picture borders, etc. Slide 1 - TITLE SLIDE OF YOUR PRODUCTION
Slide 2 - Dictionary definition of Easter
Slide 3 - Pagan origin of Easter
Slide 4 - CHRISTIAN origin of Easter
Slide 5 - What religion did JESUS, Mary, and Joseph practice? Include picture of the Holy Family
Slide 6 - Significance of Palm Sunday in the CHRISTIAN religion
Slide 7 - Significance of Holy Thursday in the CHRISTIAN religion
Slide 8 - Significance of Judas Iscariot, JESUS' disciple
Slide 9 - Significance of St. Peter to the development of CHRISTIANITY
Slide 10 - Significance of Good Friday in the CHRISTIAN religion
Slide 11 - Significance of Holy Saturday in the CHRISTIAN religion
Slide 12 - Significance of Easter Sunday in the CHRISTIAN religion
Slide 13 - What symbol do donkeys have on their back and how does it tie into Palm Sunday?
Slide 14 - How much chocolate is sold in America for Easter?
Slide 15 - What is America's favorite Easter candy? Kansas's favorite Easter candy?
Slide 16 - How are chocolate Easter bunnies eaten?
Slide 17 - The origin of the Easter bunny.
Slide 18 - Significance of Ash Wednesday for CHRISTIANS
Slide 19 - How long did JESUS hang on the cross? What events occurred as he died on the cross?
Slide 20 - Where was JESUS crucified? Include a recent photo and name the country and the city where the location is located.
For now, my son is asking for an alternative topic; he is weeks from graduating and doesn’t want me to make a fuss. If there is any push back, I WILL be escalating it.
submitted by ThrowRA--scootscooti to atheism [link] [comments]
EASTER IS HERE!! What is it really all about? YOU are going to create a slide show with slides that cover the following topics. EACH SLIDE MUST HAVE A DIFFERENT BACKGROUND, A PICTURE ABOUT THE MAIN TOPIC, TEXT THAT EXPLAINS THE TOPIC OF THE SLIDE, AND AN APPROPRIATE CLIP ART. Feel free to use animation and colored picture borders, etc. Slide 1 - TITLE SLIDE OF YOUR PRODUCTION
Slide 2 - Dictionary definition of Easter
Slide 3 - Pagan origin of Easter
Slide 4 - CHRISTIAN origin of Easter
Slide 5 - What religion did JESUS, Mary, and Joseph practice? Include picture of the Holy Family
Slide 6 - Significance of Palm Sunday in the CHRISTIAN religion
Slide 7 - Significance of Holy Thursday in the CHRISTIAN religion
Slide 8 - Significance of Judas Iscariot, JESUS' disciple
Slide 9 - Significance of St. Peter to the development of CHRISTIANITY
Slide 10 - Significance of Good Friday in the CHRISTIAN religion
Slide 11 - Significance of Holy Saturday in the CHRISTIAN religion
Slide 12 - Significance of Easter Sunday in the CHRISTIAN religion
Slide 13 - What symbol do donkeys have on their back and how does it tie into Palm Sunday?
Slide 14 - How much chocolate is sold in America for Easter?
Slide 15 - What is America's favorite Easter candy? Kansas's favorite Easter candy?
Slide 16 - How are chocolate Easter bunnies eaten?
Slide 17 - The origin of the Easter bunny.
Slide 18 - Significance of Ash Wednesday for CHRISTIANS
Slide 19 - How long did JESUS hang on the cross? What events occurred as he died on the cross?
Slide 20 - Where was JESUS crucified? Include a recent photo and name the country and the city where the location is located.
For now, my son is asking for an alternative topic; he is weeks from graduating and doesn’t want me to make a fuss. If there is any push back, I WILL be escalating it.
2024.04.01 02:55 cantaloupeparfait If we are moving away from harsh punishment, what consequences are we using?
Please note that by “harsh punishment”, I do not mean that I want to start whacking kids with rulers. What I mean is that my school moved away from detention because it was too harsh of a punishment. I’m a high school teacher and these kids just get sent home…where most of them want to be anyway. If they get an in-school suspension they just hang out in a room with their friends and disciplinary officers (who at this point have become these kids’ buddies). What consequences does your school have for teenagers that work? Are you seeing this move at your school as well?
submitted by cantaloupeparfait to Teachers [link] [comments]
2024.03.30 19:45 discobby96 gatekeeping spirituality is misguided at minimum, downright narcissistic at worst
i see a lot of people in this sub and in daily life – both overtly and subtly – acting as self-proclaimed arbiters of spirituality, expressing what they feel makes one’s spirituality valid, “on the right path”, authentic, good, etcetera – outlining what they feel the criteria of a “truly” spiritual path or person is, what the prerequisites for the spiritual life are…and so on.
to ME, this attitude is harmful, rigid and reminiscent of why so many people depart from organized religion. spirituality is becoming an exclusive club reserved for those who have met certain criteria or experienced specific phenomena.
NO!
there is a reason why all of the most respected, beloved “spiritual teachers” actively encourage their audiences to scrutinize and debunk them – encourage them to prioritize their own intuition and experiences – because at the end of the day, there are no definitive or universally held answers, truths etc re: the spiritual way.
we are all the sum total of our experiences, and we can channel these experiences in hopes that they resonate with others, but this does not make them universally true or more “right”.
the beauty of the spiritual way of life is that it is unconditionally accessible to us all, no matter what demographic, walk of life, former religion, current religion, etc. there are no prerequisites.
some people access spirituality via psyched*lics. some stumble on it after a near death experience. some find peace in it after departing from organized religion. some suppress their spirituality and find that it continues calling for them. guess what? all of these scenarios are equally valid. who are any of us to say that they aren’t or attempt to judge the depths of others’ experiences? the ONLY scenario that is deserving of judgment are people who wield their spiritual beliefs in a way that harms or oppresses others.
there have been numerous times throughout my journey where i have caught myself silently judging others’ spiritual beliefs, questioning if their lived experiences were as profound as mine. i later realized how utterly wrong and WHACK this is, and how my biases were informing my attitude.
conflating your personal biases with universal spiritual or religious “truth” is DANGEROUS TERRITORY. i don’t think i need to elaborate on this point.
i want to gently and lovingly encourage everybody in this sub who is willing to examine their personal biases, especially as they pertain to spirituality. we all have ‘em (me included). if you catch yourself attempting to police other people’s beliefs, ask yourself what about those beliefs is so triggering to you.
let everybody in this community and everybody you encounter in the world act as a mirror, a conduit, or even a teacher. life becomes more satisfying and beautiful when you approach every interaction with a willingness to learn something new.
healthy debate is natural and expected: but keep in mind that the spiritual “way” is all of ours to share. if you disagree with what i’ve posted here, GOOD. i love ya and value your disagreement all the same, because you’ll have given me some good food for thought.
submitted by discobby96 to spirituality [link] [comments]
to ME, this attitude is harmful, rigid and reminiscent of why so many people depart from organized religion. spirituality is becoming an exclusive club reserved for those who have met certain criteria or experienced specific phenomena.
NO!
there is a reason why all of the most respected, beloved “spiritual teachers” actively encourage their audiences to scrutinize and debunk them – encourage them to prioritize their own intuition and experiences – because at the end of the day, there are no definitive or universally held answers, truths etc re: the spiritual way.
we are all the sum total of our experiences, and we can channel these experiences in hopes that they resonate with others, but this does not make them universally true or more “right”.
the beauty of the spiritual way of life is that it is unconditionally accessible to us all, no matter what demographic, walk of life, former religion, current religion, etc. there are no prerequisites.
some people access spirituality via psyched*lics. some stumble on it after a near death experience. some find peace in it after departing from organized religion. some suppress their spirituality and find that it continues calling for them. guess what? all of these scenarios are equally valid. who are any of us to say that they aren’t or attempt to judge the depths of others’ experiences? the ONLY scenario that is deserving of judgment are people who wield their spiritual beliefs in a way that harms or oppresses others.
there have been numerous times throughout my journey where i have caught myself silently judging others’ spiritual beliefs, questioning if their lived experiences were as profound as mine. i later realized how utterly wrong and WHACK this is, and how my biases were informing my attitude.
conflating your personal biases with universal spiritual or religious “truth” is DANGEROUS TERRITORY. i don’t think i need to elaborate on this point.
i want to gently and lovingly encourage everybody in this sub who is willing to examine their personal biases, especially as they pertain to spirituality. we all have ‘em (me included). if you catch yourself attempting to police other people’s beliefs, ask yourself what about those beliefs is so triggering to you.
let everybody in this community and everybody you encounter in the world act as a mirror, a conduit, or even a teacher. life becomes more satisfying and beautiful when you approach every interaction with a willingness to learn something new.
healthy debate is natural and expected: but keep in mind that the spiritual “way” is all of ours to share. if you disagree with what i’ve posted here, GOOD. i love ya and value your disagreement all the same, because you’ll have given me some good food for thought.
2024.03.29 03:56 Dumbiesama [Dying soon] 我 will not make it out of the long break after A levels ALIVE😫
I have been working as a teacher at a student care center. Working with a class of 40 kids running, screaming around, clinging onto me and begging for attention + affection is not my cup of tea. I want to smack the shit out of them one by one. I work 5 days a week. I'm super burnt out on work days and will not have any energy on the weekends to do anything at all.
So far, my holidays have just been work and mentally recovering from work. Nothing fun or new at all.
I feel obliged to work because every non-NS human out there is working after A levels.
I love how I fantasize about A levels ending only for me to wish I'm back at school again. At least there's some structure and some leeway to fool around without severe consequences. I miss being the kid and not the darn teacher.
Like..."ONE SILENT CLAP BEFORE I CLAP YOUR MOMS U LITTLE MORONS~~!!!"
I know it's the PERFECT TIME to do some self discovery, get some more WORK EXPERIENCE and study about MY LIFE PURPOSE so i can get everything figured out.
The thing is, I have no interests other than sleep, game, eat, draw and write stories that are full of plot holes.
My life purpose is to make an average income, survive work everyday and focus on stupid hobbies that don't even require money. It really doesn't matter to me what I work as in the future as long as I bring food to the table.
What are some stupid things I should do to pass time? If I quit the damn job, what should I occupy myself with so that my parents won't whack me and say “USELESS!! ROT AT HOME” ??
submitted by Dumbiesama to SGExams [link] [comments]
So far, my holidays have just been work and mentally recovering from work. Nothing fun or new at all.
I feel obliged to work because every non-NS human out there is working after A levels.
I love how I fantasize about A levels ending only for me to wish I'm back at school again. At least there's some structure and some leeway to fool around without severe consequences. I miss being the kid and not the darn teacher.
Like..."ONE SILENT CLAP BEFORE I CLAP YOUR MOMS U LITTLE MORONS~~!!!"
I know it's the PERFECT TIME to do some self discovery, get some more WORK EXPERIENCE and study about MY LIFE PURPOSE so i can get everything figured out.
The thing is, I have no interests other than sleep, game, eat, draw and write stories that are full of plot holes.
My life purpose is to make an average income, survive work everyday and focus on stupid hobbies that don't even require money. It really doesn't matter to me what I work as in the future as long as I bring food to the table.
What are some stupid things I should do to pass time? If I quit the damn job, what should I occupy myself with so that my parents won't whack me and say “USELESS!! ROT AT HOME” ??
2024.03.28 15:40 yourshittyredditer MLP S1 EP1: THE MARE IN THE MOON: PART 1.
Narrator: Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, there were two regal sisters who ruled together and created harmony for all the land. To do this, the eldest used her unicorn powers to raise the sun at dawn; the younger brought out the moon to begin the night. Thus, the two sisters maintained balance for their kingdom and their subjects, all the different types of ponies. But as time went on, the younger sister became resentful. The ponies relished and played in the day her elder sister brought forth but shunned and slept through her beautiful night. One fateful day, the younger unicorn refused to lower the moon to make way for the dawn. The elder sister tried to reason with her, but the bitterness in the young one's heart had transformed her into a wicked mare of darkness: Nightmare Moon.[lightning crack]Narrator: She vowed that she would shroud the land in eternal night. Reluctantly, the elder sister harnessed the most powerful magic known to ponydom: the Elements of Harmony. Using the magic of the Elements of Harmony, she defeated her younger sister, and banished her permanently in the moon. The elder sister took on responsibility for both...Narrator and Twilight Sparkle: ...sun and moon...Twilight Sparkle: ...and harmony has been maintained in Equestria for generations since. Hmm... Elements of Harmony. I know I've heard of those before... but where?[theme song]Twinkleshine: There you are, Twilight! Moon Dancer is having a little get-together in the west castle courtyard. You wanna come?Twilight Sparkle: Oh, sorry, girls... I've got a lot of studying to catch up on.Twinkleshine: [sigh] Does that pony do anything except study? I think she's more interested in books than friends.Twilight Sparkle: I know I've heard of the Elements of Harmony.Spike: Ow!Twilight Sparkle: Spike! Spi-ike! Spike?Spike: [groan]Twilight Sparkle: There you are. Quick, find me that old copy of Predictions and Prophecies. What's that for?Spike: Well, it was a gift for Moon Dancer, but...[squeak]Twilight Sparkle: Oh, Spike, you know we don't have time for that sort of thing.Spike: But we're on a break!Twilight Sparkle: No, no, no... no, no, no! [grunts] Spike!Spike: It's over here![whack]Twilight Sparkle: Ah! Elements, Elements, E, E, E... Aha! Elements of Harmony, see: Mare in the Moon?Spike: Mare in the Moon? But that's just an old ponies' tale.Twilight Sparkle: Mare, mare... aha! The Mare in the Moon, myth from olden pony times. A powerful pony who wanted to rule Equestria, defeated by the Elements of Harmony and imprisoned in the moon. Legend has it that on the longest day of the thousandth year, the stars will aid in her escape, and she will bring about nighttime eternal! [gasp] Spike! Do you know what this means?Spike: No— whoa![smack]Spike: Ow!Twilight Sparkle: Take a note please, to the Princess.Spike: Okie dokie.Twilight Sparkle: My dearest teacher, my continuing studies of pony magic have led me to discover that we are on the precipice of disaster!Spike: Hold on. Preci... preci...Twilight Sparkle: Threshold.Spike: Threh...Twilight Sparkle: Uh, brink? Ugh, that something really bad is about to happen! For you see, the mythical Mare in the Moon is in fact Nightmare Moon, and she's about to return to Equestria, and bring with her eternal night! Something must be done to make sure this terrible prophecy does not come true. I await your quick response. Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle.Spike: Twi... light Spar... kle. Got it!Twilight Sparkle: Great! Send it.Spike: Now?Twilight Sparkle: Of course!Spike: Uh, I dunno, Twilight, Princess Celestia's a little busy getting ready for the Summer Sun Celebration. And it's like, the day after tomorrow.Twilight Sparkle: That's just it, Spike. The day after tomorrow is the thousandth year of the Summer Sun Celebration! It's imperative that the Princess is told right away!Spike: Impera... impera...Twilight Sparkle: Important!Spike: Whoa![crunch]Spike: Okay, okay! [inhale] There, it's on its way. But I wouldn't hold your breath...Twilight Sparkle: Oh, I'm not worried, Spike. The Princess trusts me completely. In all the years she's been my mentor she's never once doubted me.Spike: [belch]Twilight Sparkle: See? I knew she would want to take immediate action.Spike: [clears throat] My dearest, most faithful student Twilight. You know that I value your diligence and that I trust you completely.Twilight Sparkle: Mm-hm!Spike: ...but you simply must stop reading those dusty old books!Twilight Sparkle: [gasp]Spike: My dear Twilight, there is more to a young pony's life than studying, so I'm sending you to supervise the preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration in this year's location: Ponyville. And, I have an even more essential task for you to complete: make some friends!Twilight Sparkle: [groan]Spike: Look on the bright side, Twilight. The Princess arranged for you to stay in a library. Doesn't that make you happy?Twilight Sparkle: Yes, yes it does. You know why? Because I'm right! I'll check on the preparations as fast as I can, then get to the library to find some proof of Nightmare Moon's return.Spike: Then... when will you make friends, like the Princess said?Twilight Sparkle: She said to check on preparations. I am her student, and I'll do my royal duty, but the fate of Equestria does not rest on me making friends.Royal guards: [whinnying]Twilight Sparkle: Thank you, sirs.Royal guards: [huffing]Spike: Maybe the ponies in Ponyville have interesting things to talk about. Come on, Twilight, just try!Twilight Sparkle: Uh... hello?Pinkie Pie: [prolonged gasp]Twilight Sparkle: Well, that was interesting all right.Spike: [sigh]Spike: Summer Sun Celebration official overseer's checklist. Number one, banquet preparations: Sweet Apple Acres.Applejack: Yeehaw![thump]Twilight Sparkle: [sigh] Let's get this over with... Good afternoon. My name is Twilight Sparkle—Applejack: Well, howdy-doo, Miss Twilight, a pleasure makin' your acquaintance. I'm Applejack. We here at Sweet Apple Acres sure do like makin' new friends!Twilight Sparkle: Friends? Actually, I—Applejack: So, what can I do you for?Spike: [snickering]Twilight Sparkle: [clears throat] Well, I am in fact here to supervise preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration. And you're in charge of the food?Applejack: We sure as sugar are! Would you care to sample some?Twilight Sparkle: As long as it doesn't take too long...[triangle ringing]Applejack: Soup's on, everypony![thump]Applejack: Now, why don't I introduce y'all to the Apple family?Twilight Sparkle: Thanks, but I really need to hurry—Applejack: This here's Apple Fritter, Apple Bumpkin, Red Gala, Red Delicious, Golden Delicious, Caramel Apple, Apple Strudel, Apple Tart, Baked Apples, Apple Brioche, Apple Cinnamon Crisp... [deep breath] Big McIntosh, Apple Bloom, and Granny Smith. Up'n'attem, Granny Smith, we got guests.Granny Smith: [snort] Wha...? Soup's on? I'm up, here I come, ahm comin'...Applejack: Why, I'd say you're already part of the family!Twilight Sparkle: [spit] [nervous laughter] Okay, well, I can see the food situation is handled, so we'll be on our way.Apple Bloom: Aren't you gonna stay for brunch?Twilight Sparkle: Sorry, but we have an awful lot to do.Apple family: Awww...Twilight Sparkle: ...Fine.Apple family: [cheering]Spike: Food's all taken care of, next is weather.Twilight Sparkle: Ugh... I ate too much pie...Spike: Hmm, there's supposed to be a Pegasus pony named Rainbow Dash clearing the clouds.Twilight Sparkle: Well, she's not doing a very good job, is she?[crash]Twilight Sparkle: Nng...Rainbow Dash: [chuckles sheepishly] Uh, 'scuse me? [chuckling]Twilight Sparkle: [grumbles]Rainbow Dash: Lemme help you.[rushing water]Rainbow Dash: [laughs] Oops, I guess I overdid it. Um, uh, how about this? My very own patented Rain-Blow Dry! No no, don't thank me. You're quite welcome. [laughing]Spike: [laughing]Twilight Sparkle: Let me guess. You're Rainbow Dash.Rainbow Dash: The one and only. Why, you heard of me?Twilight Sparkle: I heard you were supposed to be keeping the sky clear. [sigh] I'm Twilight Sparkle, and the Princess sent me to check on the weather.Rainbow Dash: Yeah, yeah, that'll be a snap. I'll do it in a jiffy. Just as soon as I'm done practicing.Twilight Sparkle: Practicing for what?Rainbow Dash: The Wonderbolts! They're gonna perform at the Celebration tomorrow, and I'm gonna show 'em my stuff!Twilight Sparkle: The Wonderbolts?Rainbow Dash: Yep!Twilight Sparkle: The most talented flyers in all of Equestria?Rainbow Dash: That's them!Twilight Sparkle: Pfft! Please. They'd never accept a Pegasus who can't even keep the sky clear for one measly day.Rainbow Dash: Hey, I could clear this sky in ten seconds flat.Twilight Sparkle: Prove it.[whooshing noises]Rainbow Dash: [sounds of exertion] Loop-de-loop around, and wham! What'd I say? Ten. Seconds. Flat. I'd never leave Ponyville hanging.[sheep baaing]Rainbow Dash: [chuckles] You should see the look on your face. Ha! You're a laugh, Twilight Sparkle. I can't wait to hang out some more.Spike: Wow, she's amazing! [laughs]Twilight Sparkle: Rrgh.Spike: Wait! It's kinda pretty once you get used to it!Spike: Decorations. Beautiful...Twilight Sparkle: Yes, the décor is coming along nicely. This ought'a be quick. I'll be at the library in no time. Beautiful indeed.Spike: Not the décor, her!Rarity: No, no, no, oh! Goodness no.Spike: How are my spines? Are they straight?Twilight Sparkle: Good afternoon—Rarity: Just a moment, please! I'm 'in the zone', as it were. Oh, yes! Sparkle always does the trick, does it not? Why, Rarity, you are a talent. Now, um, how can I help yo— [yelp] Oh my stars, darling! Whatever happened to your coiffure?!Twilight Sparkle: Oh, you mean my mane? Well, it's a long story. I'm just here to check on the decorations, and then I'll be out of your hair!Rarity: Out of my hair? What about your hair?Twilight Sparkle: Wait! Where are we going? Help!Rarity: No, no, uh-uh. Too green. Too yellow. Too poofy. Not poofy enough. Too frilly. Too... shiny. Now go on, my dear. You were telling me where you're from.Twilight Sparkle: [wincing] I've... been sent... from Canterlot... to—Rarity: Huh?[crash]Rarity: Canterlot?! Oh, I am so envious! The glamour, the sophistication! I have always dreamed of living there! I can't wait to hear all about it! We are gonna be the best of friends, you and I... Emeralds?! What was I thinking? Let me get you some rubies!Twilight Sparkle: Quick! Before she decides to dye my coat a new color!Spike: [sigh]Spike: Wasn't she wonderful?Twilight Sparkle: Focus, Casanova. What's next on the list?Spike: [clears throat] Oh, uh, music! It's the last one![distant birdsong fanfare]Fluttershy: Oh my. Um, stop please, everyone, umm. Excuse me, sir? I mean no offense, but your rhythm is just a teeny-tiny bit off. Now, follow me, please. A-one, a-two, a-one two three-Twilight Sparkle: Hello!Fluttershy: [yelp]Twilight Sparkle: Oh my, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to frighten your birds. I'm just here to check up on the music and it's sounding beautiful. [pause] I'm Twilight Sparkle. [pause] What's your name?Fluttershy: [very quietly] Um... I'm Fluttershy.Twilight Sparkle: I'm sorry, what was that?Fluttershy: [even quieter] Um... My name is Fluttershy.Twilight Sparkle: Didn't quite catch that.Fluttershy: [squeaking]Twilight Sparkle: [pause] Well, um, it looks like your birds are back, so I guess everything's in order. Keep up the good work!Fluttershy: [squeaking]Twilight Sparkle: Oookay. [to Spike] Well, that was easy.Fluttershy: [gasp] A baby dragon![thump]Fluttershy: Oh, I've never seen a baby dragon before. He's sooo cute!Spike: Well, well, well...!Fluttershy: Oh my, he talks. I didn't know dragons could talk. That's just so incredibly wonderful I, I just don't even know what to say!Twilight Sparkle: Well, in that case, we'd better be going.Fluttershy: Wait, wait! What's his name?Spike: I'm Spike.Fluttershy: Hi Spike, I'm Fluttershy. Wow, a talking dragon! And what do dragons talk about?Spike: Well, what do you wanna know?Fluttershy: Absolutely everything.Twilight Sparkle: [groan]Spike: Well... I started out as a cute little purple and green egg...Spike: ...and that's the story of my whole entire life! Well, up until today. Do you wanna hear about today?Fluttershy: Oh, yes, please!Spike: Gyah!Twilight Sparkle: I am so sorry, how did we get here so fast? This is where I'm staying while in Ponyville and my poor baby dragon needs his sleep.Spike: No I don't— whoa!Twilight Sparkle: Aww, wook at dat, he's so sweepy he can't even keep his widdle bawance!Fluttershy: Poor thing, you simply must get into bed...Twilight Sparkle: Yes, yes, we'll get right on that. Well, g'night![door slamming]Spike: Huh. Rude much?Twilight Sparkle: Sorry, Spike, but I have to convince the Princess that Nightmare Moon is coming, and we're running out of time! I just need to be alone so I can study without a bunch of crazy ponies trying to make friends all the time. Now, where's the light?[honk]Ponies: Surprise![kazoo blows]Twilight Sparkle: [groan]Pinkie Pie: Surprise![party whistle blows]Pinkie Pie: Hi, I'm Pinkie Pie, and I threw this party just for you! Were you surprised? Were ya? Were ya? Huh huh huh?Twilight Sparkle: Very surprised. Libraries are supposed to be quiet.Pinkie Pie: Well, that's silly! What kind of welcome party would this be if it were quiet? I mean, duh, bo-ring! Y'see, I saw you when you first got here, remember? You were all "hello" and I was all [deep gasp], remember? Y'see I've never saw you before and if I've never saw you before that means you're new, 'cause I know everypony, and I mean everypony in Ponyville!Twilight Sparkle: [groan]Pinkie Pie: And if you're new, that meant you haven't met anyone yet, and if you haven't met anyone yet, you must not have any friends, and if you don't have any friends then you must be lonely, and that made me so sad, then I had an idea, and that's why I went [deep gasp]! I must throw a great big ginormous super-duper spectacular welcome party and invite everyone in Ponyville! See? And now you have lots and lots of friends!Applejack: Are you all right, sugarcube?[train whistle]Pinkie Pie: Aww, she's so happy she's crying!Spike: "Hot sauce".Pinkie Pie: Ooh... [with mouth full] What? It's good![muffled disco music][clock ticking]Twilight Sparkle: [groan][door opens]Spike: Hey Twilight! Pinkie Pie's starting "pin the tail on the pony"! Wanna play?Twilight Sparkle: No! All the ponies in this town are crazy! Do you know what time it is?!Spike: It's the eve of the Summer Sun Celebration. Everypony has to stay up, or they'll miss the Princess raise the sun! You really should lighten up, Twilight. It's a party!Twilight Sparkle: [mockingly imitates Spike][door closes]Twilight Sparkle: Ugh, here I thought I'd have time to learn about the Elements of Harmony but, silly me, all this ridiculous friend-making has kept me from it! "Legend has it that on the longest day of the thousandth year, the stars will aid in her escape, and she will bring about everlasting night." I hope the Princess was right... I hope it really is just an old pony tale...[door opens]Spike: C'mon, Twilight, it's time to watch the sunrise!Pinkie Pie: Isn't this exciting? Are you excited, 'cause I'm excited, I've never been so excited— well, except for the time that I saw you walking into town and I went [deep gasp] but I mean really, who can top that?[fanfare]Mayor Mare: Fillies and gentlecolts, as mayor of Ponyville, it is my great pleasure to announce the beginning of the Summer Sun Celebration![ponies cheering]Mayor Mare: In just a few moments, our town will witness the magic of the sunrise, and celebrate this, the longest day of the year! And now, it is my great honor to introduce to you the ruler of our land, the very pony who gives us the sun and the moon each and every day, the good, the wise, the bringer of harmony to all of Equestria...Fluttershy: Ready?Mayor Mare: ...Princess Celestia!Rarity: Huh?[ponies chattering quietly and nervously in the background]Twilight Sparkle: This can't be good.Mayor Mare: Remain calm, everypony, there must be a reasonable explanation!Pinkie Pie: Ooh, ooh, I love guessing games! Is she hiding?Rarity: She's gone![ponies gasping]Pinkie Pie: Ooh, she's good. [yelp][ponies gasping]Twilight Sparkle: Oh no... Nightmare Moon!Spike: [sigh]Nightmare Moon: Oh, my beloved subjects. It's been so long since I've seen your precious little sun-loving faces.Rainbow Dash: What did you do with our Princess?!Applejack: [muffled] Whoa there, Nelly...Nightmare Moon: [chuckle] Why, am I not royal enough for you? Don't you know who I am?Pinkie Pie: Ooh, ooh, more guessing games! Um, Hokey Smokes! How about... Queen Meanie! No! Black Snooty, Black Snooty—[muffled noises]Nightmare Moon: Does my crown no longer count now that I have been imprisoned for a thousand years? Did you not recall the legend? Did you not see the signs?Twilight Sparkle: I did. And I know who you are. You're the Mare in the Moon – Nightmare Moon![ponies gasping]Nightmare Moon: Well well well, somepony who remembers me. Then you also know why I'm here.Twilight Sparkle: You're here to... to... [gulp]Nightmare Moon: [chuckle] Remember this day, little ponies, for it was your last. From this moment forth, the night will last forever! [laughter, thunder][To be continued...]
submitted by yourshittyredditer to mylittlepony [link] [comments]
2024.03.27 00:40 Starletwho [5e][Online][EST]Player looking for a Long Term Homebrew Campaign
Hi, I'm Bunny. I'm 29 years old.
I'm looking for a DM who is engaged in the storyline and details roleplaying scenes descriptively. I'm looking for players who thoroughly enjoy the roleplaying aspect of the game and have rich backgrounds for their characters. I prefer a mix of both homebrew/modules or strictly homebrew. I enjoy settings that are flexible.
Character interactions between PCs and NPC's are pretty important to me. I want to become a different character when I play. I like for combat to be meaningful to the storyline in a perfect world, but I also enjoy the combat in general. If I had to pick numbers 60Roleplay/40Combat.
I used to play pretty tanky characters, but now I prefer to play support characters like a bard or cleric preferably, but I am flexible. I dont mind making male or female character either, but I prefer female.
Here are some previous characters I've made. Alhough I will make a completely new one for a campaign, I wanted to show you the kinds of characters I make.
Ghesh of Daardendria, Male 25 years old: Totem Spirit Barbarian
—
Daardendria. The will of strength is embedded in Daardendria. The midnight black scales of the dragonborn born here are feared throughout the neighboring clans. Ghesh, the youngest son the Daardendria’s clan leader, showed great promise. His strength blossomed and his size grew substantially. At 6’7, women swoon, and men hid their unease when he drew near. At 25 years old, Ghesh’s path was still undecided. The clan elders gathered to discuss his fate in stone chambers of the council.
Ghesh’s laugh echoed and boomed throughout the tavern with in the clan’s walls. He flashed his pearly white teeth at the woman next to him and winked as he continued his tale. His boisterous personality and charm captivated the people around. The dark scales on his hand reflected the lantern’s lights and his smashed his flagon down on the table. Another hearty laugh erupted from his chest.
The night continued and it was filled with laughs and booze. Finally, the night grew to an end. Ghesh stumbled out of the tavern with a woman to his side. He grabbed her by the waist as he leaned down to whisper drunken words in her ears.
“Honored son of Daardendria!” A clan guardsman exclaimed at Ghesh. The guard snapped to a formal position as he waited for Ghesh’s response. “Why so formal, Rhogar?” Ghesh spoke slowly as he looked at the guard with a puzzled and drunken expression.
“I’m sorry Ghesh, it’s the clan elders. You’re needed and it’s urgent.”
Charley Bitter, Female, 22: Forge Cleric
Charley Bitter hails from a small peaceful community. Artisans and blacksmiths center around a Temple of Gond the god of the Forge. A temple far enough factions to remain a neutral place for anyone to have their spirits and weapons tended to.
Charley, raised by craftsmen Aldo Bitter was bound to carry on the trade for her father. A faithful and devoted woman she happily gave service as a priestess to the temple and as an apprentice to the Smith shop.
Her frame is petite, 5’6. Dark tanned with giant curls. Her smile beams as brightly as her eyes glisten when she asks the kids what kind of treat they would like today.
Charley’s candy shop was one of the highlights of the community. The smell of cotton candy that permeated through the shop is now a permanent scent in her skin. It was her favorite pastime - was.
The day of Charley’s divine vision was the day the nightmares started. She was too young to remember her mother’s death. Charley’s Mother’s attempt to become a warlock had gone horribly wrong. Father won’t speak of it. The nightmares are in fragments. But the divine message was clear as day. Charley has been chosen to be a cleric. She dawned the hulking armor forged by her father. She grabs the last hammer she forged together with her father. This mission was clear and Charley patiently listens to the voice of the divine to guide her journey.
Onyx, 26 years old Female: Barbarian Noble
Onyx’s crimson eyes watched the soldiers spar with longswords in the courtyard. As the daughter of a jarl, she was never to partake in such violent acts. But she couldn't help but glance and long to fight. She gripped her dress under the desk in front of her. The fabric twisted as she sat in the chair impatiently. The terrible shrieks of her teacher made her angry with rage. A waste of her time. “Onyx! Pay attention!” Whack! The ruler smashed across Onyx’s shoulder. She bit her tongue and glared at the wooden desk in front of her. She stayed silent as a noblewoman should be.
Every day was the dame. 9:00 Breakfast. 10:00 Studies. 12:00 Lunch. 13:00 Studies. 6:00 Dinner. However, at midnight she decided to leave this town forever. In the dead of the night, she grabbed all she could carry and left with the wind. She silently walked past her father’s room until her feet froze on the wooden floor. To please her father, she played the role of a noble’s daughter, but now she had to carve her own path. Onyx continued past her father’s room slowly as her eyes glued to the door frame. A silent goodbye. The open door of the armor was her last stop. She placed her fingers around the closest sword and carried it in her arms as she left her home. She held it to her chest and hoped that she would know how to use it when the time came.
—
Her feet were sore and aching. Onyx struggled to remember how long it had been since she’d left. Four hours? 6 hours? Her eyes began to droop, and she gave in tiredness. But the rustle in the bushes woke her senses like electricity. Two men. Bandits? They slowly approached her. An easy target. A woman in elegant clothes, shakily holding a blade. “Why don’t you put that blade down before you cut yourself?” The bandit said as he approached her.
The blade pierced his skin like butter. Blood splattered her face as he succumbed to the floor. Her eyes widen as the blood sent her into a frenzy on the bandits. The excited of battle thrilled her. A new experience that she reveled in. The first splatters of blood broke a seal inside Onyx. She stood in front of the hacked bodies in her blood-soaked dress. Her face was expressionless. Her first kills and she wanted more.
—
“200 gold pieces for the deed.” Onyx’s client dropped the gold in her hand. “Thank you for your business,” Onyx spoke politely as she grasped the coin purse in her hands.
“Always, so polite,” The client said softly they watched her leave their home.
Even after all this time Onyx still retained the etiquette of a noblewoman. A year had passed since she left home. Now it's a seasoned warrior she fights and lives for the thrill of battle. She moves from town to town as a sword for hire. She eagerly enjoys the work she does, hoping that her not her father never sees what she's become
Thank you reading! Discord: bunnicupcakeprincess
submitted by Starletwho to lfg [link] [comments]
I'm looking for a DM who is engaged in the storyline and details roleplaying scenes descriptively. I'm looking for players who thoroughly enjoy the roleplaying aspect of the game and have rich backgrounds for their characters. I prefer a mix of both homebrew/modules or strictly homebrew. I enjoy settings that are flexible.
Character interactions between PCs and NPC's are pretty important to me. I want to become a different character when I play. I like for combat to be meaningful to the storyline in a perfect world, but I also enjoy the combat in general. If I had to pick numbers 60Roleplay/40Combat.
I used to play pretty tanky characters, but now I prefer to play support characters like a bard or cleric preferably, but I am flexible. I dont mind making male or female character either, but I prefer female.
Here are some previous characters I've made. Alhough I will make a completely new one for a campaign, I wanted to show you the kinds of characters I make.
Ghesh of Daardendria, Male 25 years old: Totem Spirit Barbarian
—
Daardendria. The will of strength is embedded in Daardendria. The midnight black scales of the dragonborn born here are feared throughout the neighboring clans. Ghesh, the youngest son the Daardendria’s clan leader, showed great promise. His strength blossomed and his size grew substantially. At 6’7, women swoon, and men hid their unease when he drew near. At 25 years old, Ghesh’s path was still undecided. The clan elders gathered to discuss his fate in stone chambers of the council.
Ghesh’s laugh echoed and boomed throughout the tavern with in the clan’s walls. He flashed his pearly white teeth at the woman next to him and winked as he continued his tale. His boisterous personality and charm captivated the people around. The dark scales on his hand reflected the lantern’s lights and his smashed his flagon down on the table. Another hearty laugh erupted from his chest.
The night continued and it was filled with laughs and booze. Finally, the night grew to an end. Ghesh stumbled out of the tavern with a woman to his side. He grabbed her by the waist as he leaned down to whisper drunken words in her ears.
“Honored son of Daardendria!” A clan guardsman exclaimed at Ghesh. The guard snapped to a formal position as he waited for Ghesh’s response. “Why so formal, Rhogar?” Ghesh spoke slowly as he looked at the guard with a puzzled and drunken expression.
“I’m sorry Ghesh, it’s the clan elders. You’re needed and it’s urgent.”
Charley Bitter, Female, 22: Forge Cleric
Charley Bitter hails from a small peaceful community. Artisans and blacksmiths center around a Temple of Gond the god of the Forge. A temple far enough factions to remain a neutral place for anyone to have their spirits and weapons tended to.
Charley, raised by craftsmen Aldo Bitter was bound to carry on the trade for her father. A faithful and devoted woman she happily gave service as a priestess to the temple and as an apprentice to the Smith shop.
Her frame is petite, 5’6. Dark tanned with giant curls. Her smile beams as brightly as her eyes glisten when she asks the kids what kind of treat they would like today.
Charley’s candy shop was one of the highlights of the community. The smell of cotton candy that permeated through the shop is now a permanent scent in her skin. It was her favorite pastime - was.
The day of Charley’s divine vision was the day the nightmares started. She was too young to remember her mother’s death. Charley’s Mother’s attempt to become a warlock had gone horribly wrong. Father won’t speak of it. The nightmares are in fragments. But the divine message was clear as day. Charley has been chosen to be a cleric. She dawned the hulking armor forged by her father. She grabs the last hammer she forged together with her father. This mission was clear and Charley patiently listens to the voice of the divine to guide her journey.
Onyx, 26 years old Female: Barbarian Noble
Onyx’s crimson eyes watched the soldiers spar with longswords in the courtyard. As the daughter of a jarl, she was never to partake in such violent acts. But she couldn't help but glance and long to fight. She gripped her dress under the desk in front of her. The fabric twisted as she sat in the chair impatiently. The terrible shrieks of her teacher made her angry with rage. A waste of her time. “Onyx! Pay attention!” Whack! The ruler smashed across Onyx’s shoulder. She bit her tongue and glared at the wooden desk in front of her. She stayed silent as a noblewoman should be.
Every day was the dame. 9:00 Breakfast. 10:00 Studies. 12:00 Lunch. 13:00 Studies. 6:00 Dinner. However, at midnight she decided to leave this town forever. In the dead of the night, she grabbed all she could carry and left with the wind. She silently walked past her father’s room until her feet froze on the wooden floor. To please her father, she played the role of a noble’s daughter, but now she had to carve her own path. Onyx continued past her father’s room slowly as her eyes glued to the door frame. A silent goodbye. The open door of the armor was her last stop. She placed her fingers around the closest sword and carried it in her arms as she left her home. She held it to her chest and hoped that she would know how to use it when the time came.
—
Her feet were sore and aching. Onyx struggled to remember how long it had been since she’d left. Four hours? 6 hours? Her eyes began to droop, and she gave in tiredness. But the rustle in the bushes woke her senses like electricity. Two men. Bandits? They slowly approached her. An easy target. A woman in elegant clothes, shakily holding a blade. “Why don’t you put that blade down before you cut yourself?” The bandit said as he approached her.
The blade pierced his skin like butter. Blood splattered her face as he succumbed to the floor. Her eyes widen as the blood sent her into a frenzy on the bandits. The excited of battle thrilled her. A new experience that she reveled in. The first splatters of blood broke a seal inside Onyx. She stood in front of the hacked bodies in her blood-soaked dress. Her face was expressionless. Her first kills and she wanted more.
—
“200 gold pieces for the deed.” Onyx’s client dropped the gold in her hand. “Thank you for your business,” Onyx spoke politely as she grasped the coin purse in her hands.
“Always, so polite,” The client said softly they watched her leave their home.
Even after all this time Onyx still retained the etiquette of a noblewoman. A year had passed since she left home. Now it's a seasoned warrior she fights and lives for the thrill of battle. She moves from town to town as a sword for hire. She eagerly enjoys the work she does, hoping that her not her father never sees what she's become
Thank you reading! Discord: bunnicupcakeprincess
2024.03.25 02:42 Starletwho [5e][Online][EST] Player looking to joining a roleplay heavy campaign
Hi, I'm Bunny. I'm 29 years old. I'm looking for a Weekday campaign.
I'm looking for a DM who is engaged in the storyline and details roleplaying scenes descriptively. I'm looking for players who thoroughly enjoy the roleplaying aspect of the game and have rich backgrounds for their characters. I prefer a mix of both homebrew/modules or strictly homebrew. I enjoy settings that are flexible.
Character interactions between PCs and NPC's are pretty important to me. I want to become a different character when I play. I like for combat to be meaningful to the storyline in a perfect world, but I also enjoy the combat in general. If I had to pick numbers 60Roleplay/40Combat.
I used to play pretty tanky characters, but now I prefer to play support characters like a bard or cleric preferably, but I am flexible. I dont mind making male or female character either, but I prefer female.
Here are some previous characters I've made. Alhough I will make a completely new one for a campaign, I wanted to show you the kinds of characters I make.
Ghesh of Daardendria, Male 25 years old: Totem Spirit Barbarian
—
Daardendria. The will of strength is embedded in Daardendria. The midnight black scales of the dragonborn born here are feared throughout the neighboring clans. Ghesh, the youngest son the Daardendria’s clan leader, showed great promise. His strength blossomed and his size grew substantially. At 6’7, women swoon, and men hid their unease when he drew near. At 25 years old, Ghesh’s path was still undecided. The clan elders gathered to discuss his fate in stone chambers of the council.
Ghesh’s laugh echoed and boomed throughout the tavern with in the clan’s walls. He flashed his pearly white teeth at the woman next to him and winked as he continued his tale. His boisterous personality and charm captivated the people around. The dark scales on his hand reflected the lantern’s lights and his smashed his flagon down on the table. Another hearty laugh erupted from his chest.
The night continued and it was filled with laughs and booze. Finally, the night grew to an end. Ghesh stumbled out of the tavern with a woman to his side. He grabbed her by the waist as he leaned down to whisper drunken words in her ears.
“Honored son of Daardendria!” A clan guardsman exclaimed at Ghesh. The guard snapped to a formal position as he waited for Ghesh’s response. “Why so formal, Rhogar?” Ghesh spoke slowly as he looked at the guard with a puzzled and drunken expression.
“I’m sorry Ghesh, it’s the clan elders. You’re needed and it’s urgent.”
Charley Bitter, Female, 22: Forge Cleric
Charley Bitter hails from a small peaceful community. Artisans and blacksmiths center around a Temple of Gond the god of the Forge. A temple far enough factions to remain a neutral place for anyone to have their spirits and weapons tended to.
Charley, raised by craftsmen Aldo Bitter was bound to carry on the trade for her father. A faithful and devoted woman she happily gave service as a priestess to the temple and as an apprentice to the Smith shop.
Her frame is petite, 5’6. Dark tanned with giant curls. Her smile beams as brightly as her eyes glisten when she asks the kids what kind of treat they would like today.
Charley’s candy shop was one of the highlights of the community. The smell of cotton candy that permeated through the shop is now a permanent scent in her skin. It was her favorite pastime - was.
The day of Charley’s divine vision was the day the nightmares started. She was too young to remember her mother’s death. Charley’s Mother’s attempt to become a warlock had gone horribly wrong. Father won’t speak of it. The nightmares are in fragments. But the divine message was clear as day. Charley has been chosen to be a cleric. She dawned the hulking armor forged by her father. She grabs the last hammer she forged together with her father. This mission was clear and Charley patiently listens to the voice of the divine to guide her journey.
Onyx, 26 years old Female: Barbarian Noble
Onyx’s crimson eyes watched the soldiers spar with longswords in the courtyard. As the daughter of a jarl, she was never to partake in such violent acts. But she couldn't help but glance and long to fight. She gripped her dress under the desk in front of her. The fabric twisted as she sat in the chair impatiently. The terrible shrieks of her teacher made her angry with rage. A waste of her time. “Onyx! Pay attention!” Whack! The ruler smashed across Onyx’s shoulder. She bit her tongue and glared at the wooden desk in front of her. She stayed silent as a noblewoman should be.
Every day was the dame. 9:00 Breakfast. 10:00 Studies. 12:00 Lunch. 13:00 Studies. 6:00 Dinner. However, at midnight she decided to leave this town forever. In the dead of the night, she grabbed all she could carry and left with the wind. She silently walked past her father’s room until her feet froze on the wooden floor. To please her father, she played the role of a noble’s daughter, but now she had to carve her own path. Onyx continued past her father’s room slowly as her eyes glued to the door frame. A silent goodbye. The open door of the armor was her last stop. She placed her fingers around the closest sword and carried it in her arms as she left her home. She held it to her chest and hoped that she would know how to use it when the time came.
—
Her feet were sore and aching. Onyx struggled to remember how long it had been since she’d left. Four hours? 6 hours? Her eyes began to droop, and she gave in tiredness. But the rustle in the bushes woke her senses like electricity. Two men. Bandits? They slowly approached her. An easy target. A woman in elegant clothes, shakily holding a blade. “Why don’t you put that blade down before you cut yourself?” The bandit said as he approached her.
The blade pierced his skin like butter. Blood splattered her face as he succumbed to the floor. Her eyes widen as the blood sent her into a frenzy on the bandits. The excited of battle thrilled her. A new experience that she reveled in. The first splatters of blood broke a seal inside Onyx. She stood in front of the hacked bodies in her blood-soaked dress. Her face was expressionless. Her first kills and she wanted more.
—
“200 gold pieces for the deed.” Onyx’s client dropped the gold in her hand. “Thank you for your business,” Onyx spoke politely as she grasped the coin purse in her hands.
“Always, so polite,” The client said softly they watched her leave their home.
Even after all this time Onyx still retained the etiquette of a noblewoman. A year had passed since she left home. Now it's a seasoned warrior she fights and lives for the thrill of battle. She moves from town to town as a sword for hire. She eagerly enjoys the work she does, hoping that her not her father never sees what she's become
Thank you reading! Discord: bunnicupcakeprincess
submitted by Starletwho to lfg [link] [comments]
I'm looking for a DM who is engaged in the storyline and details roleplaying scenes descriptively. I'm looking for players who thoroughly enjoy the roleplaying aspect of the game and have rich backgrounds for their characters. I prefer a mix of both homebrew/modules or strictly homebrew. I enjoy settings that are flexible.
Character interactions between PCs and NPC's are pretty important to me. I want to become a different character when I play. I like for combat to be meaningful to the storyline in a perfect world, but I also enjoy the combat in general. If I had to pick numbers 60Roleplay/40Combat.
I used to play pretty tanky characters, but now I prefer to play support characters like a bard or cleric preferably, but I am flexible. I dont mind making male or female character either, but I prefer female.
Here are some previous characters I've made. Alhough I will make a completely new one for a campaign, I wanted to show you the kinds of characters I make.
Ghesh of Daardendria, Male 25 years old: Totem Spirit Barbarian
—
Daardendria. The will of strength is embedded in Daardendria. The midnight black scales of the dragonborn born here are feared throughout the neighboring clans. Ghesh, the youngest son the Daardendria’s clan leader, showed great promise. His strength blossomed and his size grew substantially. At 6’7, women swoon, and men hid their unease when he drew near. At 25 years old, Ghesh’s path was still undecided. The clan elders gathered to discuss his fate in stone chambers of the council.
Ghesh’s laugh echoed and boomed throughout the tavern with in the clan’s walls. He flashed his pearly white teeth at the woman next to him and winked as he continued his tale. His boisterous personality and charm captivated the people around. The dark scales on his hand reflected the lantern’s lights and his smashed his flagon down on the table. Another hearty laugh erupted from his chest.
The night continued and it was filled with laughs and booze. Finally, the night grew to an end. Ghesh stumbled out of the tavern with a woman to his side. He grabbed her by the waist as he leaned down to whisper drunken words in her ears.
“Honored son of Daardendria!” A clan guardsman exclaimed at Ghesh. The guard snapped to a formal position as he waited for Ghesh’s response. “Why so formal, Rhogar?” Ghesh spoke slowly as he looked at the guard with a puzzled and drunken expression.
“I’m sorry Ghesh, it’s the clan elders. You’re needed and it’s urgent.”
Charley Bitter, Female, 22: Forge Cleric
Charley Bitter hails from a small peaceful community. Artisans and blacksmiths center around a Temple of Gond the god of the Forge. A temple far enough factions to remain a neutral place for anyone to have their spirits and weapons tended to.
Charley, raised by craftsmen Aldo Bitter was bound to carry on the trade for her father. A faithful and devoted woman she happily gave service as a priestess to the temple and as an apprentice to the Smith shop.
Her frame is petite, 5’6. Dark tanned with giant curls. Her smile beams as brightly as her eyes glisten when she asks the kids what kind of treat they would like today.
Charley’s candy shop was one of the highlights of the community. The smell of cotton candy that permeated through the shop is now a permanent scent in her skin. It was her favorite pastime - was.
The day of Charley’s divine vision was the day the nightmares started. She was too young to remember her mother’s death. Charley’s Mother’s attempt to become a warlock had gone horribly wrong. Father won’t speak of it. The nightmares are in fragments. But the divine message was clear as day. Charley has been chosen to be a cleric. She dawned the hulking armor forged by her father. She grabs the last hammer she forged together with her father. This mission was clear and Charley patiently listens to the voice of the divine to guide her journey.
Onyx, 26 years old Female: Barbarian Noble
Onyx’s crimson eyes watched the soldiers spar with longswords in the courtyard. As the daughter of a jarl, she was never to partake in such violent acts. But she couldn't help but glance and long to fight. She gripped her dress under the desk in front of her. The fabric twisted as she sat in the chair impatiently. The terrible shrieks of her teacher made her angry with rage. A waste of her time. “Onyx! Pay attention!” Whack! The ruler smashed across Onyx’s shoulder. She bit her tongue and glared at the wooden desk in front of her. She stayed silent as a noblewoman should be.
Every day was the dame. 9:00 Breakfast. 10:00 Studies. 12:00 Lunch. 13:00 Studies. 6:00 Dinner. However, at midnight she decided to leave this town forever. In the dead of the night, she grabbed all she could carry and left with the wind. She silently walked past her father’s room until her feet froze on the wooden floor. To please her father, she played the role of a noble’s daughter, but now she had to carve her own path. Onyx continued past her father’s room slowly as her eyes glued to the door frame. A silent goodbye. The open door of the armor was her last stop. She placed her fingers around the closest sword and carried it in her arms as she left her home. She held it to her chest and hoped that she would know how to use it when the time came.
—
Her feet were sore and aching. Onyx struggled to remember how long it had been since she’d left. Four hours? 6 hours? Her eyes began to droop, and she gave in tiredness. But the rustle in the bushes woke her senses like electricity. Two men. Bandits? They slowly approached her. An easy target. A woman in elegant clothes, shakily holding a blade. “Why don’t you put that blade down before you cut yourself?” The bandit said as he approached her.
The blade pierced his skin like butter. Blood splattered her face as he succumbed to the floor. Her eyes widen as the blood sent her into a frenzy on the bandits. The excited of battle thrilled her. A new experience that she reveled in. The first splatters of blood broke a seal inside Onyx. She stood in front of the hacked bodies in her blood-soaked dress. Her face was expressionless. Her first kills and she wanted more.
—
“200 gold pieces for the deed.” Onyx’s client dropped the gold in her hand. “Thank you for your business,” Onyx spoke politely as she grasped the coin purse in her hands.
“Always, so polite,” The client said softly they watched her leave their home.
Even after all this time Onyx still retained the etiquette of a noblewoman. A year had passed since she left home. Now it's a seasoned warrior she fights and lives for the thrill of battle. She moves from town to town as a sword for hire. She eagerly enjoys the work she does, hoping that her not her father never sees what she's become
Thank you reading! Discord: bunnicupcakeprincess
2024.03.24 14:10 Emergency-Bus-998 Abused and confused ... my life
Spending way too much time in my head
I wrote a thinner version of this last year, and am now writing more into it 2024... Some things are out of order and some things may be a bit vague, but the end result is the same.
I was born in a small coal mining town in east coast Canada to very unsophisticated and uneducated people. Brought up in a abusive home where everyone got abused and confused. If my father wasn't beating me, my mother was. Sometimes at the same time ... belts, sticks, shoes, bathroom towel bar. If I to hide under the bed, they'd both lift the bed from either side and catch me in the middle with no way out. My father, who never called dad... we all referred to him by his first name. So I'm confused confused as a kid, and he always remained not interested in his kids. I am not l sure of that was because he wasn't interested in my mother. But no love was ever shown. The only emotion I can see coming from this man was the expressions he show when winding up to punch my mother ... or the madness in his eyes when he put my head, as 10 year old, on a wooden kitchen chair and was going to whack me over the head with a pipe... my mother stopped that attack... again, abused and confused.
when I was 10 years old, I was molested by an uncle at my aunt's place...abused and confused.
That is the time I started to play with other little boys in the neighborhood... thinking this is what little boys do ... not until I was 13 or 14 did I know boys and girls were suppose to be together.
But as a 10 year old, I can remember laying on our couch with my hands down my pants playing with myself ... a true result of molestation... my father was walking by and saw me ... well fuck, the doubled up and said 'get your hands out of your pants you nasty little fucker ' and proceeded to punch me in the head with his doubled up fist. ...shamed ... abused and confused
At that point and I was, on one hand ashamed of myself. As a pre adolescent, going into my teens, I was confused as to whether I like boys or girls. But I have been playing with boys since that's I knew about.
Now all this happened, and for the next 4 years, nothing changed except my mother was a very mentally unstable person and spent a lot of time either trying to kill herself ... abused and confused ... and terrified.
Or she spent a lot of time in the Butterscotch Palace ... the nickname for the mental institution in our area when they were in existence... she'd go for while, and come back home.... to continue getting beat by my father.... and abusing us.
The abuse doesn't end at home:
Asked on another reddit post; who is your worst teacher and why?:
My response:
My worst teacher... ha ha ha ... Jesus, I wish I could confronted him 20 years ago when I was still a revengeful person....
In grade 5 ... so I would have been 10 years old ...
In my math class, I got cheating on a test... OK... my bad ..
This teacher put me in the corner with a dunce cap on ... OK, that's fair punishment... I didn't have to like it tho... So I took it off and went back to my desk after 15 minutes ...
He said: I didn't tell you to go back to your desk and grab me and put me back in the corner with the dunce cap ... after another 15 minutes, I took the dunce cap off and tore it into two and went back to my desk
Again, he came back to put me in the corner... this time I resisted...
What came next was nothing short of criminal.
He picked me up off the floor and slammed me on the floor ... got on top of me and was punchinĝ me in the face and head... that lasted for what seemed for ever... after I was able to get up, I picked up a desk and threw it at him.....
While he was trying to stop the desk, I ran out the door and went home to tell my mother.
What came next l, was nothing less than heroic... as seen by a 10 year old...
Now, I don't give a shit what anyone has to say of how bad I was by cheating on a test .... there is no excuse whatsoever for a grown man to be beating on a child the way this mother fucker beat me that day... but it was a day he regretted once my mother stepped in ...
It was a very traumatic experience... not only me. Fast forward, 35 years later, I received a FB message from a class mate at the time expressing her inability and apologies for not being able to do something to help me and that she often thinks about that beat down... abused and confused...
Now 11 years old my parents decided enough was enough and split up. The three youngest of the family went with her... and for a while, it was OK. I know it should not be a converned for an 11 year old boy, but that's what the molestation did to me, and I continued to seek out other little boys... it's become so engrained in my brain.
However, in a while after that, my mother could not handle being a single parent and went back to the mental institution for the longest time. And that is where we had to go visit her of we wanted to see her... and after all the abuse and torture, why would we?... as an 11...12...13...etc, it was the only 'love- we knew ... but the traumatic affects of witnessing your mother locked up with a bunch of other mentally ill people doing some very strange things was another form of physiological torture... abused and confused...
My mother was in no condition to take care of children, or she would otherwise kills us... so we were shipped off to orphanages. Another place to be abused... and find other little boys to play with in the middle of the night... shame and uncertain...
As I was growing up, I started to get attracted to females... I didn't know that was a thing until teens years... but in the end, I was so use to playing around with boys, that's where I stayed... confused...
I grew up always being attracted to females, and had a few girlfriends in my teen years, one of which I was head over heels in love with... but had no confidence, self-esteem or respect for myself... so i continued to play with boys.
My whole childhood, teen years and adulthood has been one of jealously of:
FAMILY BREAK UP
My mother and father broke when I was a very early age. My one sister that was 1 year and two months older, and my younger sister who was 4 years younger went to live with my mother. But as I stated somewhere else, she was in and out of mental institutions and a nursing home homes for the most part of her life.
There were one or two people that tried to take care of us in my mother's absence in the beginning. I am not quite sure why things did not work out for my sisters. However, I don't t hink a lot of people were equipped or knowledgeable enough to take care of severely physocologically abused children going through what we, I went through.
I was labelled as a trouble kid... what the fuck... of course I was going to be troubled. I was being thrown away for now reason. This is all after being sexually abused, physically abused and emotionally abused. The peoople who tried to take care me didn't understand this ... my social workers gave me no support or direction. My own famaily gave me no support. I can remember following my oldest sister around like a lost puppy. She had the support of my older cousins around her age and a bit older that help guide her when she left the nest. Her and my older brother. The rest of us, I feel were just left to the system without a care in the world. Of course I had emotional problems as a kid... nobody dealt with it except label me as a bad kid... and some times, we become what we are labled... This is a quote I use to use: Show a man what he is and he only becomes worse, show a man what he could be, only then, he becomes what he should be
To be honest, I cannot remember where I lived between 13 and 15. But I do remember spending time around Glace Bay and getting into trouble. This is the first time I ever went to reform school because I broke, with two other guys, who broke in to the bowling alley on the main drag. I can remember, as bad as it was being locked up... because there was physical abuse at this place as well... I didn't want to leave. People actually paid attention to me there. The good people. John B was a complete asshole.
My heart has cried for the past 55 years being empty and going through life without a purpose.. .
As I turn 56 next week, although I do not plan on doing any unspeakable atrocities, as my sister who committed suicide in 2018, I'm wondering what's life really worth?
Things were so bad that I have never been able trust anyone, develop any close relationships or have the ability to love or be loved. Today, I remain single and alone. Which is fine with me. Everyone in life has seemed to leave me. Yes, I have not developed strong social skills or relationships... in almost all of life. How could I? We all didn't have the same chances. Or because the trauma was so bad, I couldn't. Anyone who thinks they know me, knows fuck all about me.
SCHOOL:
I had a hard time in high school. Low self-esteem, confidence made worse by ignorant racist teachers. Hard as it was, I was placed in the "slow learners class" since I was a couple years behind. At one point I started to gain a little confidence when we wee given an assignment. But we were told not to go a head of the rest of the class.
Feeling like a smart kid who accomplished something good, I did.
What came next from the teacher was shameless. He called me stupid and shouted me down in front of the whole class making me feel extremely stupid....
And so that is what I believed I was starting then, and for the very longest time didn't pursue further education... until in the job training... but even still, always felt inadequate because I didn't finish high school.
I quit high school shortly after that episode. And at the same time ended up being thrown out of the children's aid society to be on my own ...
No love, no guidance, no role models. Where was a young man who was sexually, emotionally and physiologically abused to turn?...
I spent most of my life, even today, hiding my sexuality, being ashamed and somewhat dirty about it. I do feel sad that being a father was taken away from me. But in the long run, it is for the best ... maybe I'm wrong and could have made a wonderful father. But the way I feel makes me think I wouldn't have been. I have only been able to survive for myself throughout the years.
Yesteryear, I use to worry a lot about what people think of me, contrary to what I just mentioned about still hiding my sexuality, I don't particularly give a flying shit what people think. Nobody was there for me in the past growing up, they don't have a right to judge me
I must end things here .... although the story doesn't end
But one last note: to all of the abuser and those that are mentally unstable please please think about what you doing ... you destroying lives of innocent kids and or creating future monsters
Abused and confused
submitted by Emergency-Bus-998 to mentalillness [link] [comments]
I wrote a thinner version of this last year, and am now writing more into it 2024... Some things are out of order and some things may be a bit vague, but the end result is the same.
I was born in a small coal mining town in east coast Canada to very unsophisticated and uneducated people. Brought up in a abusive home where everyone got abused and confused. If my father wasn't beating me, my mother was. Sometimes at the same time ... belts, sticks, shoes, bathroom towel bar. If I to hide under the bed, they'd both lift the bed from either side and catch me in the middle with no way out. My father, who never called dad... we all referred to him by his first name. So I'm confused confused as a kid, and he always remained not interested in his kids. I am not l sure of that was because he wasn't interested in my mother. But no love was ever shown. The only emotion I can see coming from this man was the expressions he show when winding up to punch my mother ... or the madness in his eyes when he put my head, as 10 year old, on a wooden kitchen chair and was going to whack me over the head with a pipe... my mother stopped that attack... again, abused and confused.
when I was 10 years old, I was molested by an uncle at my aunt's place...abused and confused.
That is the time I started to play with other little boys in the neighborhood... thinking this is what little boys do ... not until I was 13 or 14 did I know boys and girls were suppose to be together.
But as a 10 year old, I can remember laying on our couch with my hands down my pants playing with myself ... a true result of molestation... my father was walking by and saw me ... well fuck, the doubled up and said 'get your hands out of your pants you nasty little fucker ' and proceeded to punch me in the head with his doubled up fist. ...shamed ... abused and confused
At that point and I was, on one hand ashamed of myself. As a pre adolescent, going into my teens, I was confused as to whether I like boys or girls. But I have been playing with boys since that's I knew about.
Now all this happened, and for the next 4 years, nothing changed except my mother was a very mentally unstable person and spent a lot of time either trying to kill herself ... abused and confused ... and terrified.
Or she spent a lot of time in the Butterscotch Palace ... the nickname for the mental institution in our area when they were in existence... she'd go for while, and come back home.... to continue getting beat by my father.... and abusing us.
The abuse doesn't end at home:
Asked on another reddit post; who is your worst teacher and why?:
My response:
My worst teacher... ha ha ha ... Jesus, I wish I could confronted him 20 years ago when I was still a revengeful person....
In grade 5 ... so I would have been 10 years old ...
In my math class, I got cheating on a test... OK... my bad ..
This teacher put me in the corner with a dunce cap on ... OK, that's fair punishment... I didn't have to like it tho... So I took it off and went back to my desk after 15 minutes ...
He said: I didn't tell you to go back to your desk and grab me and put me back in the corner with the dunce cap ... after another 15 minutes, I took the dunce cap off and tore it into two and went back to my desk
Again, he came back to put me in the corner... this time I resisted...
What came next was nothing short of criminal.
He picked me up off the floor and slammed me on the floor ... got on top of me and was punchinĝ me in the face and head... that lasted for what seemed for ever... after I was able to get up, I picked up a desk and threw it at him.....
While he was trying to stop the desk, I ran out the door and went home to tell my mother.
What came next l, was nothing less than heroic... as seen by a 10 year old...
Now, I don't give a shit what anyone has to say of how bad I was by cheating on a test .... there is no excuse whatsoever for a grown man to be beating on a child the way this mother fucker beat me that day... but it was a day he regretted once my mother stepped in ...
It was a very traumatic experience... not only me. Fast forward, 35 years later, I received a FB message from a class mate at the time expressing her inability and apologies for not being able to do something to help me and that she often thinks about that beat down... abused and confused...
Now 11 years old my parents decided enough was enough and split up. The three youngest of the family went with her... and for a while, it was OK. I know it should not be a converned for an 11 year old boy, but that's what the molestation did to me, and I continued to seek out other little boys... it's become so engrained in my brain.
However, in a while after that, my mother could not handle being a single parent and went back to the mental institution for the longest time. And that is where we had to go visit her of we wanted to see her... and after all the abuse and torture, why would we?... as an 11...12...13...etc, it was the only 'love- we knew ... but the traumatic affects of witnessing your mother locked up with a bunch of other mentally ill people doing some very strange things was another form of physiological torture... abused and confused...
My mother was in no condition to take care of children, or she would otherwise kills us... so we were shipped off to orphanages. Another place to be abused... and find other little boys to play with in the middle of the night... shame and uncertain...
As I was growing up, I started to get attracted to females... I didn't know that was a thing until teens years... but in the end, I was so use to playing around with boys, that's where I stayed... confused...
I grew up always being attracted to females, and had a few girlfriends in my teen years, one of which I was head over heels in love with... but had no confidence, self-esteem or respect for myself... so i continued to play with boys.
My whole childhood, teen years and adulthood has been one of jealously of:
- Other men and sons that have, not only a weaker than should be relationship, at least there is a relationship, or very strong bonds.... something I'd never know
- Family get together of any kind ... never experienced loving family get together... there are 6 surviving members of our siblings... when we got together, that is all there was, were loud violent arguments about who had the worst beat down from my my mother and or father... abused and confused
FAMILY BREAK UP
My mother and father broke when I was a very early age. My one sister that was 1 year and two months older, and my younger sister who was 4 years younger went to live with my mother. But as I stated somewhere else, she was in and out of mental institutions and a nursing home homes for the most part of her life.
There were one or two people that tried to take care of us in my mother's absence in the beginning. I am not quite sure why things did not work out for my sisters. However, I don't t hink a lot of people were equipped or knowledgeable enough to take care of severely physocologically abused children going through what we, I went through.
I was labelled as a trouble kid... what the fuck... of course I was going to be troubled. I was being thrown away for now reason. This is all after being sexually abused, physically abused and emotionally abused. The peoople who tried to take care me didn't understand this ... my social workers gave me no support or direction. My own famaily gave me no support. I can remember following my oldest sister around like a lost puppy. She had the support of my older cousins around her age and a bit older that help guide her when she left the nest. Her and my older brother. The rest of us, I feel were just left to the system without a care in the world. Of course I had emotional problems as a kid... nobody dealt with it except label me as a bad kid... and some times, we become what we are labled... This is a quote I use to use: Show a man what he is and he only becomes worse, show a man what he could be, only then, he becomes what he should be
To be honest, I cannot remember where I lived between 13 and 15. But I do remember spending time around Glace Bay and getting into trouble. This is the first time I ever went to reform school because I broke, with two other guys, who broke in to the bowling alley on the main drag. I can remember, as bad as it was being locked up... because there was physical abuse at this place as well... I didn't want to leave. People actually paid attention to me there. The good people. John B was a complete asshole.
My heart has cried for the past 55 years being empty and going through life without a purpose.. .
As I turn 56 next week, although I do not plan on doing any unspeakable atrocities, as my sister who committed suicide in 2018, I'm wondering what's life really worth?
Things were so bad that I have never been able trust anyone, develop any close relationships or have the ability to love or be loved. Today, I remain single and alone. Which is fine with me. Everyone in life has seemed to leave me. Yes, I have not developed strong social skills or relationships... in almost all of life. How could I? We all didn't have the same chances. Or because the trauma was so bad, I couldn't. Anyone who thinks they know me, knows fuck all about me.
SCHOOL:
I had a hard time in high school. Low self-esteem, confidence made worse by ignorant racist teachers. Hard as it was, I was placed in the "slow learners class" since I was a couple years behind. At one point I started to gain a little confidence when we wee given an assignment. But we were told not to go a head of the rest of the class.
Feeling like a smart kid who accomplished something good, I did.
What came next from the teacher was shameless. He called me stupid and shouted me down in front of the whole class making me feel extremely stupid....
And so that is what I believed I was starting then, and for the very longest time didn't pursue further education... until in the job training... but even still, always felt inadequate because I didn't finish high school.
I quit high school shortly after that episode. And at the same time ended up being thrown out of the children's aid society to be on my own ...
No love, no guidance, no role models. Where was a young man who was sexually, emotionally and physiologically abused to turn?...
I spent most of my life, even today, hiding my sexuality, being ashamed and somewhat dirty about it. I do feel sad that being a father was taken away from me. But in the long run, it is for the best ... maybe I'm wrong and could have made a wonderful father. But the way I feel makes me think I wouldn't have been. I have only been able to survive for myself throughout the years.
Yesteryear, I use to worry a lot about what people think of me, contrary to what I just mentioned about still hiding my sexuality, I don't particularly give a flying shit what people think. Nobody was there for me in the past growing up, they don't have a right to judge me
I must end things here .... although the story doesn't end
But one last note: to all of the abuser and those that are mentally unstable please please think about what you doing ... you destroying lives of innocent kids and or creating future monsters
Abused and confused
2024.03.19 18:21 Crafter235 Fixing Yandere Love Simulator: Updating the clothing, give a clearer story, open-ended choices, make creepy fanservice in-narrative+have morality choices, more locations, education minigames, and bonus content
From fixingmovies: https://www.reddit.com/fixingmovies/s/EJhf2Rm5AG
Before you get to the point, yes I know. YandereDev is a lazy creep who could get nothing done. Another thing I found out though was that there were others who tried to make games that better utilized the concept, but they would get shut down because of suicide threats from YandereDev. It's sad though how such a good concept would be half-assed and all stuck with this self-centered monster. For here, this is about what I would have done with the concept, and create a much better game.
Long story short: Have systematic environments, lived-in npcs and characters, and a variety of choices to give players interesting experiences and tell their own stories.
Overall, this is how I would have made Yandere Love Simulator into an actual good game.
submitted by Crafter235 to Osana [link] [comments]
Before you get to the point, yes I know. YandereDev is a lazy creep who could get nothing done. Another thing I found out though was that there were others who tried to make games that better utilized the concept, but they would get shut down because of suicide threats from YandereDev. It's sad though how such a good concept would be half-assed and all stuck with this self-centered monster. For here, this is about what I would have done with the concept, and create a much better game.
- Update the clothing
- Give a clearer story/narrative
- Open-ended Choices
Long story short: Have systematic environments, lived-in npcs and characters, and a variety of choices to give players interesting experiences and tell their own stories.
- Make the creepy fanservice in-narrative and have morality choices
- More locations
- Education minigames
- Bonus content
- New locations
- Expanded school stuff (classes, clubs, students, etc.)
- Yandere-Kun Love Mode: Instead of the female protagonist we get in the game, we now have the opportunity to play as a male yandere. Both have the option to date other characters, and each have areas and rooms that one can enter but rhe other cannot, such as gender-separate bathrooms or changing rooms. Also, they may be easier to seduce or befriend characters of the same gender.
- Ultimate pervert: Gain max possible xp from perverted activity. When you earn it, the game will not look at you positively.
- Ultimate freak: Gain max possible xp from general foulplay. Like previous achievement, the game will look down on you.
- Saiko Killer: Kill all npcs
- Nice romance ending: End up in a nice relationship, no murder or sick activity. In other words, no depravity playthrough.
- Yuri/Yaoi love: End the game in a same-sex relationship.
Overall, this is how I would have made Yandere Love Simulator into an actual good game.
2024.03.19 17:50 Crafter235 Fixing Yandere Love Simulator: Updating the clothing, give a clearer story, open-ended choices, make creepy fanservice in-narrative+have morality choices, more locations, education minigames, and bonus content
Before you get to the point, yes I know. YandereDev is a lazy creep who could get nothing done. Another thing I found out though was that there were others who tried to make games that better utilized the concept, but they would get shut down because of suicide threats from YandereDev. It's sad though how such a good concept would be half-assed and all stuck with this self-centered monster. For here, this is about what I would have done with the concept, and create a much better game.
Long story short: Have systematic environments, lived-in npcs and characters, and a variety of choices to give players interesting experiences and tell their own stories.
Overall, this is how I would have made Yandere Love Simulator into an actual good game.
submitted by Crafter235 to fixingmovies [link] [comments]
- Update the clothing
- Give a clearer story/narrative
- Open-ended Choices
Long story short: Have systematic environments, lived-in npcs and characters, and a variety of choices to give players interesting experiences and tell their own stories.
- Make the creepy fanservice in-narrative and have morality choices
- More locations
- Education minigames
- Bonus content
- New locations
- Expanded school stuff (classes, clubs, students, etc.)
- Yandere-Kun Love Mode: Instead of the female protagonist we get in the game, we now have the opportunity to play as a male yandere. Both have the option to date other characters, and each have areas and rooms that one can enter but rhe other cannot, such as gender-separate bathrooms or changing rooms. Also, they may be easier to seduce or befriend characters of the same gender.
- Ultimate pervert: Gain max possible xp from perverted activity. When you earn it, the game will not look at you positively.
- Ultimate freak: Gain max possible xp from general foulplay. Like previous achievement, the game will look down on you.
- Saiko Killer: Kill all npcs
- Nice romance ending: End up in a nice relationship, no murder or sick activity. In other words, no depravity playthrough.
- Yuri/Yaoi love: End the game in a same-sex relationship.
Overall, this is how I would have made Yandere Love Simulator into an actual good game.
2024.03.16 21:37 Ink_Wielder Lost in Lucidity: Chapter 17 ~ Mother's Intuition (1/2)
{Previous Chapter} ~ {Chapter Library} ~ {Next Part}
It takes the better part of the following day before they get me unhooked from all the machines and tubes that have been keeping me alive for the last week. I don't mind the wait, though. All the while, my family and Val are nearby to keep me company through the tests and diagnostics. I hadn't realized how much of an effect my very lucid dream was going to have on me. Despite only being out for a week, I had deeply missed them, feeling their tragic absence in that strange world I had been living in for what felt like an eternity.
As the process nears its end, I'm allowed to change back into some normal clothes, which I eagerly do. I may have been unconscious, but the sensation of nothing but gowns from my time here certainly shows on my body. I wear something long sleeved to hide the shameful sight that mars my arm, then ready myself. My evaluation is only a few minutes away.
My family cleared out to go get food while I'm interviewed, but Valentine has sworn not to leave my side till the doctor arrives. She must be able to tell that I'm nervous.
"Hey..." she nudges, leaning against my shoulder with her arm laced into mine, "Don't look so scared, hun. It's going to be okay."
I purse my lips, "What if they find out I'm insane now or something and I have to be held longer?"
"Pfft. Wes. You're fine. You're clearly all there mentally."
With a smile and narrowed eyes, I take her chin in my hand and say, "I'm not so sure about that one. I somehow forgot I was dating a girl like you. I feel like that alone is a sign I need help."
"That's alright," Val giggles before laying her heavenly lips upon mine. She pulls away with a satisfying release, "I'll just keep reminding you."
It's not long after that when my former therapist arrives. Val wishes me luck with a wink and exits as Dr. Kaphila beams pure zeal my way.
"Hello, Wesly," she coos with a hand to her mouth and watery eyes, "I am so relieved to see you well. When they called me and told me you were awake, I've never been more relieved in my life." Kaphila sits on one side of the bed while I take the other. She reaches over and takes my hand, "How are you feeling, dear?"
"Good." I tell her, "Um, at least I think. My wound doesn't really hurt at all now that they have me unhooked, which is unexpected. I guess I shouldn't complain, though."
Kaphila chuckles, "Yeah, modern medicine has come a long way. And I'm told Dr. Carrow is very good at what he does."
"He must be if I'm sitting here right now." I joke. "I was in bad shape, Doctor..."
Kaphila smiles and nods, "I'm aware. I came to visit you a few times while you were out. There's a reason I got so emotional upon seeing you just now."
I shrink into myself, "I'm sorry to have scared you like that..."
"Wesly, please, you don't need to feel any guilt. What's done is done, and it turned out fine in the end. Let's try not to dwell on it, okay?"
"Um, y-yeah, sure." I try to smile.
"Good. Now...." Arti starts, taking out her notebook, "how are you feeling mentally? Dr. Carrow told me you've been feeling a little disorientated?"
I rub at my arm, "Um, yeah." I tell her, "While I was in my coma, I had this really weird... dream? Hallucination? I'm not exactly sure what to call it, but... it felt incredibly real. I guess it's just been messing with me is all. It feels kind of stupid to say out loud, I guess.
"Well, that's nothing to feel ashamed about, Wesly. There have been plenty of cases if people in comas reporting dreams upon waking up. Many have said the same thing as you. Being in such a prolonged state of unconsciousness can have a very harsh effect on the brain, especially when it isn't receiving any outside stimulus. The only thing for it to work with during that time is whatever is already in there. It's not impossible that it might cause some very lucid dreams."
I purse my lips. What she's saying seems to make sense to someone like me with no knowledge of how psychology works, but I'm still not entirely convinced. Kaphila seems to notice.
"Hmm. How about this? I had some questions I prepared for the evaluation, but this seems to be weighing on you pretty heavy. Why don't we knock out some of the important ones, then you tell me some more details about this dream of yours? We'll work through it, yeah? See if we can't find what was so important about it."
I'm honestly a little more concerned about my cognitive functions now that I think about it, but the prospect of sorting out the dream mess is more immediately appealing to me.
"Sure." I nod, "That sounds good."
Arti and I run through some questions like she said, and they all seem to be what I expected. Things like basic trivia about myself, general cognitive tests, brain teasers and other stuff to make sure my brain is still functioning at its usual rate. To my relief, once we're done, Arti tells me it seems my amnesia was just a momentary lapse, as everything looks to be present. She warns that some information may still be inactive to my brain, and not to be startled if something comes up that seems foreign to me, as my mind will adjust with time. She also asks me some emotional questions that are a less fun to answer. How is my mood on a scale of one to ten? Have I experienced any bouts of uncontrollable sadness or frustration since waking?
Am I still considering self harm?
I must answer everything correctly because no red flags seem to raise, and she simply responds, "Good." To each response as she marks it off her clipboard. I try to sneak a peek at what she's writing a few times, but it all looks like scribbles to me.
After that, true to her word, we begin to run through my dream. The doctor stares and nods along intently, scrawling notes down as I go. She never interrupts, and when I'm finished, she takes a long look over her paper to ponder.
"That is a rather disturbing nightmare to be trapped in. I can understand why it upset you so much."
"It was all just so real. Like, remembering it, I can still feel the physical pain of things that happened. And the grief of losing people; usually when I have dreams like that, it's a relief when I wake up, but..."
"Is there not relief now?"
"There was—I mean, there is. But if I think too long on it, something feels lost... like this emptiness that something is missing."
"What do you think that is?"
With strong hesitation, I caution forward, "I... I guess I feel like maybe I haven't woken up? Like my eyes are going to snap open any minute and I'm going to be back there. Like all of this is the dream."
Kaphila contemplates for a moment while I sit and watch, an aura of nervousness gradually growing. I almost certainly sound insane to her, and that does not bode well for this analysis.
"When we dream," she finally starts, "We tend to dream about things that are often on our minds, or things that are immediately prominent in our lives."
I'm not exactly following her logic, "I don't want to question your knowledge, doctor, but I wasn't really thinking about whatever those... things were a whole lot..."
Arti chuckles, "No, of course not. But rarely are objects so literal in dreams. Sometimes our stresses and fears manifest in other forms, I.E. monsters and demons. You were obviously in a very emotional and heavy place the night of your accident. It's likely that, while slipping into unconsciousness, your brain latched on to the things you were dealing with and ran with them. A dream enhanced by a comatose state built upon negative energy and thoughts. I'd wager that's all it was, Wesly."
"I don't know... I-It's more than that, Arti. I still can't shake this feeling that something is wrong, and every time I trace it back, it ends at this dream."
Kaphila purses her lips then looks down to her notes, "Our last session before your accident, do you recall what we talked about?"
I humor her question, trying hard to recall. The more I dig at it, the more the dense fog clouding my brain clears, and I finally manage an honest nod.
She makes sure that I recall it correctly, "You told me you felt alone. That everyone in your life seemed to be slowly vanishing. Does... that sound a little familiar?"
The pressure on my chest and the tingling in my neck ease off a bit at her gentle words, offering a crutch for my panic to lean on.
"These monsters, the things that constantly plagued you and attacked you; they kept you isolated, yes? Locked up in a compound with nowhere to go? I'm afraid to say that sounds a little familiar too..."
It's becoming clear to me what she's getting at. I nod slowly.
"I'll bet if you trace all of these things back, Wes, there's some sort of explanation for it. It all feels so real because you have such a raw, honest connection to it."
I attentively chew on her words in solemnness as, trying to force the pieces she's given me into their proper holes. One in particular just won't fit, however, "What about Leigh and my Mom?" The grief that still lingers in the pit of my gut feels all too real, despite knowing that they're alive. I need to know if Arti has an excuse for that.
She shrugs, "It could mean a lot of things. You've told me before they're some of the closest people in your life to you. Losing them in the dream could have been a manifestation of the fear that they'll vanish too."
"T-Then why would Val not be dead? O-Or my dad?"
"Well, you mentioned that your father always left to work at a dam, right? And that you often felt distant from Valentine? Seems to me it was there, in another form, at least."
I pull my gaze from her. What she's saying makes sense. At least, I think it does... As I reflect again on the details, they all begin to seem less unsettling. I draw lines myself that I hadn't even thought of before, and eventually, the conclusion seems obvious: it was nothing more than a dream. A harmless hallucination of a half dying mind. I was awake now. I was free of it. It's unnecessary for me to stress over something so trivial, especially after surviving almost killing myself. I should be happy to be alive. Happy that I get to correct my terrible mistakes. Happy that I get to see my family and friends again...
And yet...
I can't let it go. Not fully, at least. Part of it is still drilled into my skull, not easily pried free with skepticism. Arti clearly sees it, and so she offers one last thing to try and ease my restlessness.
"Do you know what I think, Wesly?"
"Huh?"
"Remember when we talked about coping mechanisms?"
It takes a moment for the memory to materialize, and I nod.
"I think this might be one of those."
"The dream?"
"No, dear, you clinging so tightly to the idea of it. I think that you've convinced yourself, especially after what's happened, that you don't deserve to be happy. I think you feel you need to punish yourself by dwelling on that awful place for what you think you put your family through, but let me tell you, Wes, you do deserve happiness. You've already been through so, so much... Your family isn't upset, they're happy you're alive. None of them ever left this hospital while you slept because that's how much they care for you." Dr. Kaphila reaches over and takes my hand again, smiling with all sincerity, "This is your second chance, Wes. Don't repeat the patterns that got you here in the first place. That part of you is dead now; leave him behind back in that forest and don't look back. Let's look forward, okay?"
I stare at her, stunned for a moment, half from the bluntness of her words, and half from that still lingering denial. It doesn't take long for the core of what she just said to sink in, though, and it feels warm as it dances around me.
'This is your second chance...You deserve to be happy.'
I decide to take it gently in my scarred hands, and pull it in close, letting it envelop me. It feels odd, foreign almost, to allow myself such confidence, but the sensation is nice, and I truly am ready to move forward.
With the pit in my stomach now filled, and the tingling on my spine snuffed out, I smile, "Okay. I think I can try to do that."
~
The coming months aren't easy as I work on recovering. The physical part is; It only takes a few days after leaving the hospital to get the bandages off and regain full use of the tendons in my hand. When Dr. Carrow peels the cloth away, the scar is a lot less terrible than I expect, too. Just a smooth (albeit, thick) fleshy line running my forearm. The mental part, though? That's a whole other battle.
As much as I want to pretend that waking up from my suicide attempt left me with some divine revelation of joy, it didn't work out that way. The guilt is consuming me alive from what I put my family and friends through, and despite being happy to have lived, surviving didn't completely make all of that previous pain go away. I can still feel that oppressive weight of despondency looming over my head from day to day, striving to keep me in bed and urging me to shut myself away from it all.
Like I said, though, ever since I've been up, I've had my family and Val there to keep me from slipping back into that consuming void. Dad's temper has been nearly non-existent, and his patience is at an all-time high, making him much more of a joy to be around than before. Leigh and I talk more frequently after school and at night when she's not at her friends and Val isn't over. I forgot how much I enjoyed having conversations with my sister. It's something I always took for granted. Now they're a highlight of my day. Mom is always smiles and warmth toward me, although that's not necessarily a new thing. I had just gotten too closed off to let it in. Every time she sees me now, even if I've only left for a few hours, she tells me how much she loves me. And I know she's not just saying it because she's scared I'll try something again; she means it with all of her heart.
Then there's Valentine. I can't get her to leave me alone, and it's the best punishment I can think of. She took an entire week off school once I got out of the hospital just to spend time with me.
"I missed out on a whole week with you already," she told me when I tried to tell her not to, "This is my reimbursement."
She delicately kisses me awake in the morning, and at night, she takes me in her arms and won't let go till dawn. I don't either. I just lay there awake with a content smile locked on my lips, wondering how on earth it is that I could have been so unhappy to leave all of this behind. I try not to do that so much, though. Like I promised to Dr. Kaphila, I was going to try and think less about what happened in the past and look more toward the future. She told me that when we have our sessions again soon, I can get all of those thoughts out with her.
When it comes time for me (and Val) to finally go back to school, it's nowhere near as bad as I was dreading. I thought I was going to have miles of catch up to play, loads of weird and judgmental looks from people I knew, and a healthy dose of anxiety to encroach it all. To my pleasant surprise, though, none of that happens. I don't have any assignments waiting for me with any teachers, and the work I start doing when I return seems to come effortlessly to me. I feel more clear-headed than ever, and all of the formulas, equations and essays flow out of me like they've always been inside my head.
As for the judgmental looks, they're almost non-existent. Many people in the school didn't even hear the gossip about me, and even if they had, they likely wouldn't have known who I was. Those who did, however, didn't act how I expected at all. They were all beyond happy to see me again, giving me pats on the back, hugs, or just coming up to say hi and tell me so. All of that anxiety that I had built inside me from anticipation rapidly fizzled out with each greeting, and one in particular eradicates it entirely.
With the clomp of combat boots and streak of black through the halls, I'm tackled into a tight embrace, "Hey there, stranger." I hear Claireese faintly whisper into my shoulder.
With a laugh, I hold her back and exclaim, "Whoa, a hug from you?" I'm honored to get such a privilege."
She snickers, but doesn't let go, "You're lucky I was so worried about you, otherwise, I'd punch you right now for being a jerk."
I finally initiate the pull away, "What? How am I being a jerk?"
"You go missing for weeks, and you're gonna' sass me for being happy to see you?"
I put my hands up, "Okay, okay, you're right. I'm sorry."
Claire shows my face her palm and turns to feign an exit, "No, it's too late; I get it. You just want me to screw off. I can take a hint."
"Shut up," I chuckle, stepping forward to match her gate as the two of us start off down the hall, "I missed you too, Claire."
The sterile halls and unfamiliar crowds suddenly feel brighter walking it with a friend.
"So, how are you feeling?" She asks before shutting her eyes and shaking her head, "Actually, no. I'm sure you're sick of that question. I can do better. You glad to be back?"
I shrug, "I wasn't really looking forward to it if I'm being honest. I felt pretty dumb about what happened, y'know? But everyone has been super nice about it."
"Neyome, don't feel dumb about what happened. No one thinks anything less of you. We're just glad you're alright."
I nod, then try to change the subject, "How have things been around here? Anything crazy happen while I've been gone?"
"Ha. Yeah. You didn't hear about the gang war over in D hall?"
"Oh?"
"Mhmm. And the chemistry teacher got busted for his meth empire."
"Wow, really? What else?"
"Let's see... Oh! The cheerleaders were embezzling money from school fund. Crazy stuff."
"I'll bet." I chuckle.
She does too. "Nah, nothing has happened. Same ol' boring shit as usual. Now that you're back, though, things'll be more interesting. We'll have to get the gang together and go do something!"
"The gang?"
Claire furrows her brow in confusion, "You, me, Leigh and Valentine? Friends since childhood? 'The gang'?"
The neurons finally fire, "Oh, duh, I didn't remember we all—Sorry; the doctors told me I have some sort of amnesia after waking up. It's got me all out of whack."
"Whoa, shit, really?"
"Yeah. It's nothing major, but some minor details or people have been getting away from me."
"Well, you seem to be doing well with it. You remembered who I was."
"How could I ever forget?" I roll my eyes.
Claire bats her lashes, and clasps her hands before leaning against me, "Awe! I'm so honored to have made the cutoff for your memory."
"Yeah, but I'm running out of storage, I might have to delete you to make room."
She squints, "You could never."
We laugh to ourselves as I give her give her a playful shove off of me. Not wanting our interaction to end, I think of more conversation to press for, "So how have you been personally? How are you and Trent doing?"
Claireese snickers, "Who the hell is Trent?"
"Your... Your boyfriend?"
"Wes, I'm not dating anyone." She chuckles.
This time, instead of firing, the electricity in my brain sputters like a dying fuse. I could have sworn Claireese had a boyfriend, "I-I thought you were? Trent, right? You guys have been dating for a few years?"
Claire pats me on the shoulder, "I haven't dated anyone in a while, guy. And if this is your way of asking, I must say, it needs some work." She teases.
The more I try to mull it over, the more I realize she must be right. There's a vague face to who I'm imagining, but nothing comes in clear enough to be concrete. I'm about to chalk it up to another amnesia effect, but then something else about the situation dawns on me...
'Why is Claireese—'
"Whattup', big bro?" Leigh chants with a huge smile, hooking my arm as she walks by. She bounces to a stop as her momentum drags my gaze from Claire. "How's the first day back going?"
"Oh—um, hey, Leigh. Good, so far."
"Claire?" she checks with a raised brow.
Claireese snorts, "He's had a few malfunctions with me, but he seems to be in working order otherwise."
"Well good. You seem to be almost a celebrity around here now. Everyone is buzzing about you being back."
"Weird thing to celebrate..." I grumble.
Leigh flicks my arm, "C'mon, people are happy to see you! Don't be such a downer about it!"
"He can't help it, Leigh," Claire smirks. She locks her arm into mine from the side, then pulls close and plants a quick kiss on my cheek, "Jaded is part of his charm." She adjusts the strap of her bag then gives us a wave, "It's really good to have you back, Wesly. See you two later; let's get together soon, yeah?"
With that, she turns toward the wing containing her classroom and heads off. Leigh and I keep going toward our own while my brows curve downward in confusion.
"Hey, does Claireese seem... Different to you?"
"Huh? No, why?"
"I don't know I guess I just didn't remember her being so... bubbly? Or touchy?" She seemed almost flirty, and that's something I wasn't super comfortable with. I didn't want to upset Val...
Leigh doesn't seem to see it as a big deal. With rolled eyes, she smirks, "Wes, how many times are you going to make us say it—"
"I know, I know; 'they're happy to see me'."
My sister chuckles as we move along, and then after a while, strikes up a new topic, "How's the school work load been? They give you a lot to catch up on?"
"Nah, most of my teachers waved assignments and told me not to worry about it."
"Dang, that's super lucky!"
I smirk, "It actually gets better. My councilor called me this morning and told me I'm excused from doing my senior project too." Senior project is something my school requires your last year of high school. It's a way to get you looking for careers and getting involved with the field you want to go into. Overall, though, a lot of people view it as a waste of time in an already stressful school year. Getting it waved was huge.
"No way!" Leigh's eyes bulge, "Man, you've got it made!"
"We'll see. The main thing I'm thinking about now is my college applications. With all that time I missed, I'm still waiting on some hidden grading thing to come crashing down on my head."
"You'll be fine. You've always had great grades otherwise. I'm sure MIT will be mailing you back any day now, begging you to come."
I smile and look at my sibling, "Thanks, sis. Although, I'm not going to worry about it too much. Massachusetts is pretty far, and right now, I've got a lot to stay here for."
As we stop outside her classroom, I reach out and ruffle her hair, to which she grimaces before beaming back at me, "I'll see you later, big bro. Text me if you need anything. I'm going to Katie's after school, but do you and Val wanna watch a movie later tonight? We can invite Claire too?"
I nod with a smile, "That sounds nice." I wave to Leigh, then turn to leave, but before I do, I take in my sister's joyful expression one last time. It's nice to see it like that after what feels like so long.
But then, something happens. As Leigh stands before her classroom door, my eyes trace up to take in the background. A large, open set of double doors leading into the choir room. Within, kids are filing into their seats among the raised benches, but an abrupt stab of nausea shifts the scene for a split second. A dark room behind Leigh devoid of people, even darker than the surrounding halls. In front of me, Leigh still stands smiling, but her face is no longer reassuring to look at. Perfect, dark holes stain her skin, violently spewing crimson down her cheeks and neck, staining her clothes.
Then, before I can ever process what I've seen, I'm staring at the normal, brightly lit school halls once more.
I must be visibly shocked by whatever I just witnessed because Leigh tilts her head, "Are you okay?"
The tingle in my spine is back, and it feels as electric as ever. Not wanting to worry my sister, however, I force an uneasy upturn of my lips, "Oh, y-yeah, sorry. I just realized I'm going to be late for class. I'll see you later, okay?"
Leigh nods.
I start down the hallway toward my classroom, trying to shake whatever that strange flash was. Some sort of PTSD from my dream? Was that even possible? My resolution is to ask Dr. Kaphila about it next time that I see her, but in the meantime, I try to push it out of my head. I need to focus on school. I glance up at a nearby clock to check on the factuality of my last statement to Leigh. My head is still swimming a bit, so the numbers seem blurry and jumbled at first, but once they adjust, to my relief, I realize that I still have plenty of time to make it to class.
~
Like Leigh said, she's going to a friends after school, and Valentine has a student council meeting, so that leaves me to walk home alone. I don't mind, however. It's essentially my first time being alone since waking up, and the respite of self-meditation is nice. I stroll through the neighborhood, taking the cool and refreshing pre-winter's air as I walk. Despite the cooler weather, it's still nice and clear today, so a few other people in the area are out and about as well. I wave and smile as I pass, something I might not have done as much before everything. Usually, my eyes would find an excuse to be anywhere else, and my hands would stay firmly in my pockets. But with everything that's happened, I just feel more confident these days. Life is too short to shut the world out like that...
As I arrive home, a smile stretches across my face upon seeing mom on the couch, engrossed in TV and surrounded by scattered papers. She's been working from home ever since my accident, something that she keeps claiming will end soon but never does. It makes me feel bad, but I selfishly admit that it's nice to have her around.
"Oh, hey, honey." She welcomes, "Home already? Wow, time must have gotten away from me."
I cross to the couch with a grin and hug her from behind, "Hi, mom. How's work coming?"
"Good. I just finished, actually. Was getting ready to pack this mess up." She begins sweeping papers into neat piles that she arranges into folders. I step around the sofa to assist. "No Valentine with you, huh?"
"Nah, she has a student council meeting."
"Oh, I see. And Leigh went to her friends, right?"
"Mhmm."
Mom shrugs and puffs her cheeks with air, "Well, your dad is working a little late tonight. I guess that means we're on our own for the evening then. What do you say we head into town really quick and get some Thai?"
"I'd say that sounds pretty good."
"Great! Let me just put this back in the office and change, then we'll head out."
After a few minutes, the two of us are making our way through town and over to a small Thai restaurant. We chat the entire way, catching up on the finer details of our days before taking a seat in the small, local diner.
"I'm very excited," Mom titters while popping open the menu, "I didn't eat much today, and I've been craving some yellow curry*.*"
"I haven't had Thai in so long." I say, "I think the last time we came was for Leigh's birthday, right?"
"Leigh loves her noodles."
I chuckle, then pour over the entrées till I decide. When I'm done, I find mom staring at me, her head resting on her knuckles.
"I'm so glad you're here, honey."
With a full heart, I can't help but snicker, "I appreciate it, mom, but you don't have to keep telling me that. I'm not going anywhere, I promise."
"I know, but... I still just want you to know. I feel like I never told you that enough before..."
"Yes you did, Mom. You always made me feel loved."
"Has it been easier these past few weeks? You know, compared to..."
I nod, "Yeah. Yeah, it has. It was still hard at first as I adjusted but honestly... The more time passes, the more I can't even remember why I was so distraught to begin with. You've all given me so much and—You gave me so much. I don't know how I ever got as low as I did."
"Well, I hope it never happens again." Mom coos. Her hand drifts across the table to rest on my wrist, "We're going to make sure that it doesn't. All of us."
With a smile on my face, I meet her gaze and stare back into her eyes. The gesture is genuine, but admittedly, there's been a growing anxiety within me, given everything that's going on. I'm certain that I do a good job of hiding it, but somehow, mom still seems to sense it in me. Mother's intuition, I suppose.
"What? What is it?" She asks.
I don't even bother trying to protest. If she was able to gather that something was wrong based on my joyful expression alone, there's no way I can hide anything from her, "N-Nothing, everything is great I just..."
"You just what?"
I sigh, "I'm not sure, Mom. I guess I'm just worried. Everything has been so perfect these past few weeks, and it's been really uplifting to my health."
"And that's a bad thing?" Mom teases.
"No." I laugh softly, "But I'm just worried about what's going to happen when things aren't again. Yeah, everything is lovely now, but we're in, like, the 'honeymoon' phase of all this. I think everything seems so bright because I have a new set of eyes to look at it with. But when that all dies down and goes back to normal, I don't want to fall back into that same hole I came from. I don't want to let you all down."
Mom lovingly scoffs and closes her eyes, her lips gently curved upward, "Wesly, you would never let us down, and things won't change. It's not just you that's seeing things differently. We all got a new view on this. We didn't realize what you were dealing with at the time, but now that we do, we know how to help. How to be there for you. That concept isn't going to just fade with time. Not when the price for forgetting is you."
I shyly skirt my gaze, the pressure of attention prodding at me. I look down at the faded scar on my arm and brush my fingers over it. Hardly a tingle in any nerve.
"Thanks mom." I smile, "I love you."
"I love you too, honey."
I look back up at her to reassure her I'm alright, but when I do, something happens that jolts me to my core. Her expression isn't gentle and loving anymore. It's starkly concerned and almost fearful. The surrounding restaurant has become astonishingly dark, nearly pitch black, and before me, I see my mother's figure begin slowly drawing back into it.
No, wait, she's not moving... her skin is dissolving.
Around the edges, I see her skin steadily melting away and dissolving into the void. Before I can even react to anything I'm seeing, my mom surprises me by lunging forward and grabbing my arm again like a vice clamping down on steel. Her face remains fearful, but she speaks sternly.
"Wesly, look around you. This isn't perfect."
My vision is momentarily overtaken by a red shutter, and in an instant, the room returns to its original condition. Mom sits across from me, smiling, her hand tenderly resting on my own. The lights have returned and the radio at the back of the restaurant is melodiously humming out a muffled tune. I don't even try to hide my shock, which mom cocks her head at.
"Wesly? What's wrong now?"
"N-Nothing." I gasp out softly.
"Hello! Welcome in!" the server next to us erupts into her routine, making me jump, "What can I get started for you two?"
Mom greets her with a smile and begins listing off her order, but I just keep staring at her across the table. That wasn't déjà vu or some sort of PTSD from a dream. That was a full-blown hallucination. But with the feeling at the back of my neck stronger than ever before, I can't help but think that it's something much, much worse.
{Next Part}
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It takes the better part of the following day before they get me unhooked from all the machines and tubes that have been keeping me alive for the last week. I don't mind the wait, though. All the while, my family and Val are nearby to keep me company through the tests and diagnostics. I hadn't realized how much of an effect my very lucid dream was going to have on me. Despite only being out for a week, I had deeply missed them, feeling their tragic absence in that strange world I had been living in for what felt like an eternity.
As the process nears its end, I'm allowed to change back into some normal clothes, which I eagerly do. I may have been unconscious, but the sensation of nothing but gowns from my time here certainly shows on my body. I wear something long sleeved to hide the shameful sight that mars my arm, then ready myself. My evaluation is only a few minutes away.
My family cleared out to go get food while I'm interviewed, but Valentine has sworn not to leave my side till the doctor arrives. She must be able to tell that I'm nervous.
"Hey..." she nudges, leaning against my shoulder with her arm laced into mine, "Don't look so scared, hun. It's going to be okay."
I purse my lips, "What if they find out I'm insane now or something and I have to be held longer?"
"Pfft. Wes. You're fine. You're clearly all there mentally."
With a smile and narrowed eyes, I take her chin in my hand and say, "I'm not so sure about that one. I somehow forgot I was dating a girl like you. I feel like that alone is a sign I need help."
"That's alright," Val giggles before laying her heavenly lips upon mine. She pulls away with a satisfying release, "I'll just keep reminding you."
It's not long after that when my former therapist arrives. Val wishes me luck with a wink and exits as Dr. Kaphila beams pure zeal my way.
"Hello, Wesly," she coos with a hand to her mouth and watery eyes, "I am so relieved to see you well. When they called me and told me you were awake, I've never been more relieved in my life." Kaphila sits on one side of the bed while I take the other. She reaches over and takes my hand, "How are you feeling, dear?"
"Good." I tell her, "Um, at least I think. My wound doesn't really hurt at all now that they have me unhooked, which is unexpected. I guess I shouldn't complain, though."
Kaphila chuckles, "Yeah, modern medicine has come a long way. And I'm told Dr. Carrow is very good at what he does."
"He must be if I'm sitting here right now." I joke. "I was in bad shape, Doctor..."
Kaphila smiles and nods, "I'm aware. I came to visit you a few times while you were out. There's a reason I got so emotional upon seeing you just now."
I shrink into myself, "I'm sorry to have scared you like that..."
"Wesly, please, you don't need to feel any guilt. What's done is done, and it turned out fine in the end. Let's try not to dwell on it, okay?"
"Um, y-yeah, sure." I try to smile.
"Good. Now...." Arti starts, taking out her notebook, "how are you feeling mentally? Dr. Carrow told me you've been feeling a little disorientated?"
I rub at my arm, "Um, yeah." I tell her, "While I was in my coma, I had this really weird... dream? Hallucination? I'm not exactly sure what to call it, but... it felt incredibly real. I guess it's just been messing with me is all. It feels kind of stupid to say out loud, I guess.
"Well, that's nothing to feel ashamed about, Wesly. There have been plenty of cases if people in comas reporting dreams upon waking up. Many have said the same thing as you. Being in such a prolonged state of unconsciousness can have a very harsh effect on the brain, especially when it isn't receiving any outside stimulus. The only thing for it to work with during that time is whatever is already in there. It's not impossible that it might cause some very lucid dreams."
I purse my lips. What she's saying seems to make sense to someone like me with no knowledge of how psychology works, but I'm still not entirely convinced. Kaphila seems to notice.
"Hmm. How about this? I had some questions I prepared for the evaluation, but this seems to be weighing on you pretty heavy. Why don't we knock out some of the important ones, then you tell me some more details about this dream of yours? We'll work through it, yeah? See if we can't find what was so important about it."
I'm honestly a little more concerned about my cognitive functions now that I think about it, but the prospect of sorting out the dream mess is more immediately appealing to me.
"Sure." I nod, "That sounds good."
Arti and I run through some questions like she said, and they all seem to be what I expected. Things like basic trivia about myself, general cognitive tests, brain teasers and other stuff to make sure my brain is still functioning at its usual rate. To my relief, once we're done, Arti tells me it seems my amnesia was just a momentary lapse, as everything looks to be present. She warns that some information may still be inactive to my brain, and not to be startled if something comes up that seems foreign to me, as my mind will adjust with time. She also asks me some emotional questions that are a less fun to answer. How is my mood on a scale of one to ten? Have I experienced any bouts of uncontrollable sadness or frustration since waking?
Am I still considering self harm?
I must answer everything correctly because no red flags seem to raise, and she simply responds, "Good." To each response as she marks it off her clipboard. I try to sneak a peek at what she's writing a few times, but it all looks like scribbles to me.
After that, true to her word, we begin to run through my dream. The doctor stares and nods along intently, scrawling notes down as I go. She never interrupts, and when I'm finished, she takes a long look over her paper to ponder.
"That is a rather disturbing nightmare to be trapped in. I can understand why it upset you so much."
"It was all just so real. Like, remembering it, I can still feel the physical pain of things that happened. And the grief of losing people; usually when I have dreams like that, it's a relief when I wake up, but..."
"Is there not relief now?"
"There was—I mean, there is. But if I think too long on it, something feels lost... like this emptiness that something is missing."
"What do you think that is?"
With strong hesitation, I caution forward, "I... I guess I feel like maybe I haven't woken up? Like my eyes are going to snap open any minute and I'm going to be back there. Like all of this is the dream."
Kaphila contemplates for a moment while I sit and watch, an aura of nervousness gradually growing. I almost certainly sound insane to her, and that does not bode well for this analysis.
"When we dream," she finally starts, "We tend to dream about things that are often on our minds, or things that are immediately prominent in our lives."
I'm not exactly following her logic, "I don't want to question your knowledge, doctor, but I wasn't really thinking about whatever those... things were a whole lot..."
Arti chuckles, "No, of course not. But rarely are objects so literal in dreams. Sometimes our stresses and fears manifest in other forms, I.E. monsters and demons. You were obviously in a very emotional and heavy place the night of your accident. It's likely that, while slipping into unconsciousness, your brain latched on to the things you were dealing with and ran with them. A dream enhanced by a comatose state built upon negative energy and thoughts. I'd wager that's all it was, Wesly."
"I don't know... I-It's more than that, Arti. I still can't shake this feeling that something is wrong, and every time I trace it back, it ends at this dream."
Kaphila purses her lips then looks down to her notes, "Our last session before your accident, do you recall what we talked about?"
I humor her question, trying hard to recall. The more I dig at it, the more the dense fog clouding my brain clears, and I finally manage an honest nod.
She makes sure that I recall it correctly, "You told me you felt alone. That everyone in your life seemed to be slowly vanishing. Does... that sound a little familiar?"
The pressure on my chest and the tingling in my neck ease off a bit at her gentle words, offering a crutch for my panic to lean on.
"These monsters, the things that constantly plagued you and attacked you; they kept you isolated, yes? Locked up in a compound with nowhere to go? I'm afraid to say that sounds a little familiar too..."
It's becoming clear to me what she's getting at. I nod slowly.
"I'll bet if you trace all of these things back, Wes, there's some sort of explanation for it. It all feels so real because you have such a raw, honest connection to it."
I attentively chew on her words in solemnness as, trying to force the pieces she's given me into their proper holes. One in particular just won't fit, however, "What about Leigh and my Mom?" The grief that still lingers in the pit of my gut feels all too real, despite knowing that they're alive. I need to know if Arti has an excuse for that.
She shrugs, "It could mean a lot of things. You've told me before they're some of the closest people in your life to you. Losing them in the dream could have been a manifestation of the fear that they'll vanish too."
"T-Then why would Val not be dead? O-Or my dad?"
"Well, you mentioned that your father always left to work at a dam, right? And that you often felt distant from Valentine? Seems to me it was there, in another form, at least."
I pull my gaze from her. What she's saying makes sense. At least, I think it does... As I reflect again on the details, they all begin to seem less unsettling. I draw lines myself that I hadn't even thought of before, and eventually, the conclusion seems obvious: it was nothing more than a dream. A harmless hallucination of a half dying mind. I was awake now. I was free of it. It's unnecessary for me to stress over something so trivial, especially after surviving almost killing myself. I should be happy to be alive. Happy that I get to correct my terrible mistakes. Happy that I get to see my family and friends again...
And yet...
I can't let it go. Not fully, at least. Part of it is still drilled into my skull, not easily pried free with skepticism. Arti clearly sees it, and so she offers one last thing to try and ease my restlessness.
"Do you know what I think, Wesly?"
"Huh?"
"Remember when we talked about coping mechanisms?"
It takes a moment for the memory to materialize, and I nod.
"I think this might be one of those."
"The dream?"
"No, dear, you clinging so tightly to the idea of it. I think that you've convinced yourself, especially after what's happened, that you don't deserve to be happy. I think you feel you need to punish yourself by dwelling on that awful place for what you think you put your family through, but let me tell you, Wes, you do deserve happiness. You've already been through so, so much... Your family isn't upset, they're happy you're alive. None of them ever left this hospital while you slept because that's how much they care for you." Dr. Kaphila reaches over and takes my hand again, smiling with all sincerity, "This is your second chance, Wes. Don't repeat the patterns that got you here in the first place. That part of you is dead now; leave him behind back in that forest and don't look back. Let's look forward, okay?"
I stare at her, stunned for a moment, half from the bluntness of her words, and half from that still lingering denial. It doesn't take long for the core of what she just said to sink in, though, and it feels warm as it dances around me.
'This is your second chance...You deserve to be happy.'
I decide to take it gently in my scarred hands, and pull it in close, letting it envelop me. It feels odd, foreign almost, to allow myself such confidence, but the sensation is nice, and I truly am ready to move forward.
With the pit in my stomach now filled, and the tingling on my spine snuffed out, I smile, "Okay. I think I can try to do that."
~
The coming months aren't easy as I work on recovering. The physical part is; It only takes a few days after leaving the hospital to get the bandages off and regain full use of the tendons in my hand. When Dr. Carrow peels the cloth away, the scar is a lot less terrible than I expect, too. Just a smooth (albeit, thick) fleshy line running my forearm. The mental part, though? That's a whole other battle.
As much as I want to pretend that waking up from my suicide attempt left me with some divine revelation of joy, it didn't work out that way. The guilt is consuming me alive from what I put my family and friends through, and despite being happy to have lived, surviving didn't completely make all of that previous pain go away. I can still feel that oppressive weight of despondency looming over my head from day to day, striving to keep me in bed and urging me to shut myself away from it all.
Like I said, though, ever since I've been up, I've had my family and Val there to keep me from slipping back into that consuming void. Dad's temper has been nearly non-existent, and his patience is at an all-time high, making him much more of a joy to be around than before. Leigh and I talk more frequently after school and at night when she's not at her friends and Val isn't over. I forgot how much I enjoyed having conversations with my sister. It's something I always took for granted. Now they're a highlight of my day. Mom is always smiles and warmth toward me, although that's not necessarily a new thing. I had just gotten too closed off to let it in. Every time she sees me now, even if I've only left for a few hours, she tells me how much she loves me. And I know she's not just saying it because she's scared I'll try something again; she means it with all of her heart.
Then there's Valentine. I can't get her to leave me alone, and it's the best punishment I can think of. She took an entire week off school once I got out of the hospital just to spend time with me.
"I missed out on a whole week with you already," she told me when I tried to tell her not to, "This is my reimbursement."
She delicately kisses me awake in the morning, and at night, she takes me in her arms and won't let go till dawn. I don't either. I just lay there awake with a content smile locked on my lips, wondering how on earth it is that I could have been so unhappy to leave all of this behind. I try not to do that so much, though. Like I promised to Dr. Kaphila, I was going to try and think less about what happened in the past and look more toward the future. She told me that when we have our sessions again soon, I can get all of those thoughts out with her.
When it comes time for me (and Val) to finally go back to school, it's nowhere near as bad as I was dreading. I thought I was going to have miles of catch up to play, loads of weird and judgmental looks from people I knew, and a healthy dose of anxiety to encroach it all. To my pleasant surprise, though, none of that happens. I don't have any assignments waiting for me with any teachers, and the work I start doing when I return seems to come effortlessly to me. I feel more clear-headed than ever, and all of the formulas, equations and essays flow out of me like they've always been inside my head.
As for the judgmental looks, they're almost non-existent. Many people in the school didn't even hear the gossip about me, and even if they had, they likely wouldn't have known who I was. Those who did, however, didn't act how I expected at all. They were all beyond happy to see me again, giving me pats on the back, hugs, or just coming up to say hi and tell me so. All of that anxiety that I had built inside me from anticipation rapidly fizzled out with each greeting, and one in particular eradicates it entirely.
With the clomp of combat boots and streak of black through the halls, I'm tackled into a tight embrace, "Hey there, stranger." I hear Claireese faintly whisper into my shoulder.
With a laugh, I hold her back and exclaim, "Whoa, a hug from you?" I'm honored to get such a privilege."
She snickers, but doesn't let go, "You're lucky I was so worried about you, otherwise, I'd punch you right now for being a jerk."
I finally initiate the pull away, "What? How am I being a jerk?"
"You go missing for weeks, and you're gonna' sass me for being happy to see you?"
I put my hands up, "Okay, okay, you're right. I'm sorry."
Claire shows my face her palm and turns to feign an exit, "No, it's too late; I get it. You just want me to screw off. I can take a hint."
"Shut up," I chuckle, stepping forward to match her gate as the two of us start off down the hall, "I missed you too, Claire."
The sterile halls and unfamiliar crowds suddenly feel brighter walking it with a friend.
"So, how are you feeling?" She asks before shutting her eyes and shaking her head, "Actually, no. I'm sure you're sick of that question. I can do better. You glad to be back?"
I shrug, "I wasn't really looking forward to it if I'm being honest. I felt pretty dumb about what happened, y'know? But everyone has been super nice about it."
"Neyome, don't feel dumb about what happened. No one thinks anything less of you. We're just glad you're alright."
I nod, then try to change the subject, "How have things been around here? Anything crazy happen while I've been gone?"
"Ha. Yeah. You didn't hear about the gang war over in D hall?"
"Oh?"
"Mhmm. And the chemistry teacher got busted for his meth empire."
"Wow, really? What else?"
"Let's see... Oh! The cheerleaders were embezzling money from school fund. Crazy stuff."
"I'll bet." I chuckle.
She does too. "Nah, nothing has happened. Same ol' boring shit as usual. Now that you're back, though, things'll be more interesting. We'll have to get the gang together and go do something!"
"The gang?"
Claire furrows her brow in confusion, "You, me, Leigh and Valentine? Friends since childhood? 'The gang'?"
The neurons finally fire, "Oh, duh, I didn't remember we all—Sorry; the doctors told me I have some sort of amnesia after waking up. It's got me all out of whack."
"Whoa, shit, really?"
"Yeah. It's nothing major, but some minor details or people have been getting away from me."
"Well, you seem to be doing well with it. You remembered who I was."
"How could I ever forget?" I roll my eyes.
Claire bats her lashes, and clasps her hands before leaning against me, "Awe! I'm so honored to have made the cutoff for your memory."
"Yeah, but I'm running out of storage, I might have to delete you to make room."
She squints, "You could never."
We laugh to ourselves as I give her give her a playful shove off of me. Not wanting our interaction to end, I think of more conversation to press for, "So how have you been personally? How are you and Trent doing?"
Claireese snickers, "Who the hell is Trent?"
"Your... Your boyfriend?"
"Wes, I'm not dating anyone." She chuckles.
This time, instead of firing, the electricity in my brain sputters like a dying fuse. I could have sworn Claireese had a boyfriend, "I-I thought you were? Trent, right? You guys have been dating for a few years?"
Claire pats me on the shoulder, "I haven't dated anyone in a while, guy. And if this is your way of asking, I must say, it needs some work." She teases.
The more I try to mull it over, the more I realize she must be right. There's a vague face to who I'm imagining, but nothing comes in clear enough to be concrete. I'm about to chalk it up to another amnesia effect, but then something else about the situation dawns on me...
'Why is Claireese—'
"Whattup', big bro?" Leigh chants with a huge smile, hooking my arm as she walks by. She bounces to a stop as her momentum drags my gaze from Claire. "How's the first day back going?"
"Oh—um, hey, Leigh. Good, so far."
"Claire?" she checks with a raised brow.
Claireese snorts, "He's had a few malfunctions with me, but he seems to be in working order otherwise."
"Well good. You seem to be almost a celebrity around here now. Everyone is buzzing about you being back."
"Weird thing to celebrate..." I grumble.
Leigh flicks my arm, "C'mon, people are happy to see you! Don't be such a downer about it!"
"He can't help it, Leigh," Claire smirks. She locks her arm into mine from the side, then pulls close and plants a quick kiss on my cheek, "Jaded is part of his charm." She adjusts the strap of her bag then gives us a wave, "It's really good to have you back, Wesly. See you two later; let's get together soon, yeah?"
With that, she turns toward the wing containing her classroom and heads off. Leigh and I keep going toward our own while my brows curve downward in confusion.
"Hey, does Claireese seem... Different to you?"
"Huh? No, why?"
"I don't know I guess I just didn't remember her being so... bubbly? Or touchy?" She seemed almost flirty, and that's something I wasn't super comfortable with. I didn't want to upset Val...
Leigh doesn't seem to see it as a big deal. With rolled eyes, she smirks, "Wes, how many times are you going to make us say it—"
"I know, I know; 'they're happy to see me'."
My sister chuckles as we move along, and then after a while, strikes up a new topic, "How's the school work load been? They give you a lot to catch up on?"
"Nah, most of my teachers waved assignments and told me not to worry about it."
"Dang, that's super lucky!"
I smirk, "It actually gets better. My councilor called me this morning and told me I'm excused from doing my senior project too." Senior project is something my school requires your last year of high school. It's a way to get you looking for careers and getting involved with the field you want to go into. Overall, though, a lot of people view it as a waste of time in an already stressful school year. Getting it waved was huge.
"No way!" Leigh's eyes bulge, "Man, you've got it made!"
"We'll see. The main thing I'm thinking about now is my college applications. With all that time I missed, I'm still waiting on some hidden grading thing to come crashing down on my head."
"You'll be fine. You've always had great grades otherwise. I'm sure MIT will be mailing you back any day now, begging you to come."
I smile and look at my sibling, "Thanks, sis. Although, I'm not going to worry about it too much. Massachusetts is pretty far, and right now, I've got a lot to stay here for."
As we stop outside her classroom, I reach out and ruffle her hair, to which she grimaces before beaming back at me, "I'll see you later, big bro. Text me if you need anything. I'm going to Katie's after school, but do you and Val wanna watch a movie later tonight? We can invite Claire too?"
I nod with a smile, "That sounds nice." I wave to Leigh, then turn to leave, but before I do, I take in my sister's joyful expression one last time. It's nice to see it like that after what feels like so long.
But then, something happens. As Leigh stands before her classroom door, my eyes trace up to take in the background. A large, open set of double doors leading into the choir room. Within, kids are filing into their seats among the raised benches, but an abrupt stab of nausea shifts the scene for a split second. A dark room behind Leigh devoid of people, even darker than the surrounding halls. In front of me, Leigh still stands smiling, but her face is no longer reassuring to look at. Perfect, dark holes stain her skin, violently spewing crimson down her cheeks and neck, staining her clothes.
Then, before I can ever process what I've seen, I'm staring at the normal, brightly lit school halls once more.
I must be visibly shocked by whatever I just witnessed because Leigh tilts her head, "Are you okay?"
The tingle in my spine is back, and it feels as electric as ever. Not wanting to worry my sister, however, I force an uneasy upturn of my lips, "Oh, y-yeah, sorry. I just realized I'm going to be late for class. I'll see you later, okay?"
Leigh nods.
I start down the hallway toward my classroom, trying to shake whatever that strange flash was. Some sort of PTSD from my dream? Was that even possible? My resolution is to ask Dr. Kaphila about it next time that I see her, but in the meantime, I try to push it out of my head. I need to focus on school. I glance up at a nearby clock to check on the factuality of my last statement to Leigh. My head is still swimming a bit, so the numbers seem blurry and jumbled at first, but once they adjust, to my relief, I realize that I still have plenty of time to make it to class.
~
Like Leigh said, she's going to a friends after school, and Valentine has a student council meeting, so that leaves me to walk home alone. I don't mind, however. It's essentially my first time being alone since waking up, and the respite of self-meditation is nice. I stroll through the neighborhood, taking the cool and refreshing pre-winter's air as I walk. Despite the cooler weather, it's still nice and clear today, so a few other people in the area are out and about as well. I wave and smile as I pass, something I might not have done as much before everything. Usually, my eyes would find an excuse to be anywhere else, and my hands would stay firmly in my pockets. But with everything that's happened, I just feel more confident these days. Life is too short to shut the world out like that...
As I arrive home, a smile stretches across my face upon seeing mom on the couch, engrossed in TV and surrounded by scattered papers. She's been working from home ever since my accident, something that she keeps claiming will end soon but never does. It makes me feel bad, but I selfishly admit that it's nice to have her around.
"Oh, hey, honey." She welcomes, "Home already? Wow, time must have gotten away from me."
I cross to the couch with a grin and hug her from behind, "Hi, mom. How's work coming?"
"Good. I just finished, actually. Was getting ready to pack this mess up." She begins sweeping papers into neat piles that she arranges into folders. I step around the sofa to assist. "No Valentine with you, huh?"
"Nah, she has a student council meeting."
"Oh, I see. And Leigh went to her friends, right?"
"Mhmm."
Mom shrugs and puffs her cheeks with air, "Well, your dad is working a little late tonight. I guess that means we're on our own for the evening then. What do you say we head into town really quick and get some Thai?"
"I'd say that sounds pretty good."
"Great! Let me just put this back in the office and change, then we'll head out."
After a few minutes, the two of us are making our way through town and over to a small Thai restaurant. We chat the entire way, catching up on the finer details of our days before taking a seat in the small, local diner.
"I'm very excited," Mom titters while popping open the menu, "I didn't eat much today, and I've been craving some yellow curry*.*"
"I haven't had Thai in so long." I say, "I think the last time we came was for Leigh's birthday, right?"
"Leigh loves her noodles."
I chuckle, then pour over the entrées till I decide. When I'm done, I find mom staring at me, her head resting on her knuckles.
"I'm so glad you're here, honey."
With a full heart, I can't help but snicker, "I appreciate it, mom, but you don't have to keep telling me that. I'm not going anywhere, I promise."
"I know, but... I still just want you to know. I feel like I never told you that enough before..."
"Yes you did, Mom. You always made me feel loved."
"Has it been easier these past few weeks? You know, compared to..."
I nod, "Yeah. Yeah, it has. It was still hard at first as I adjusted but honestly... The more time passes, the more I can't even remember why I was so distraught to begin with. You've all given me so much and—You gave me so much. I don't know how I ever got as low as I did."
"Well, I hope it never happens again." Mom coos. Her hand drifts across the table to rest on my wrist, "We're going to make sure that it doesn't. All of us."
With a smile on my face, I meet her gaze and stare back into her eyes. The gesture is genuine, but admittedly, there's been a growing anxiety within me, given everything that's going on. I'm certain that I do a good job of hiding it, but somehow, mom still seems to sense it in me. Mother's intuition, I suppose.
"What? What is it?" She asks.
I don't even bother trying to protest. If she was able to gather that something was wrong based on my joyful expression alone, there's no way I can hide anything from her, "N-Nothing, everything is great I just..."
"You just what?"
I sigh, "I'm not sure, Mom. I guess I'm just worried. Everything has been so perfect these past few weeks, and it's been really uplifting to my health."
"And that's a bad thing?" Mom teases.
"No." I laugh softly, "But I'm just worried about what's going to happen when things aren't again. Yeah, everything is lovely now, but we're in, like, the 'honeymoon' phase of all this. I think everything seems so bright because I have a new set of eyes to look at it with. But when that all dies down and goes back to normal, I don't want to fall back into that same hole I came from. I don't want to let you all down."
Mom lovingly scoffs and closes her eyes, her lips gently curved upward, "Wesly, you would never let us down, and things won't change. It's not just you that's seeing things differently. We all got a new view on this. We didn't realize what you were dealing with at the time, but now that we do, we know how to help. How to be there for you. That concept isn't going to just fade with time. Not when the price for forgetting is you."
I shyly skirt my gaze, the pressure of attention prodding at me. I look down at the faded scar on my arm and brush my fingers over it. Hardly a tingle in any nerve.
"Thanks mom." I smile, "I love you."
"I love you too, honey."
I look back up at her to reassure her I'm alright, but when I do, something happens that jolts me to my core. Her expression isn't gentle and loving anymore. It's starkly concerned and almost fearful. The surrounding restaurant has become astonishingly dark, nearly pitch black, and before me, I see my mother's figure begin slowly drawing back into it.
No, wait, she's not moving... her skin is dissolving.
Around the edges, I see her skin steadily melting away and dissolving into the void. Before I can even react to anything I'm seeing, my mom surprises me by lunging forward and grabbing my arm again like a vice clamping down on steel. Her face remains fearful, but she speaks sternly.
"Wesly, look around you. This isn't perfect."
My vision is momentarily overtaken by a red shutter, and in an instant, the room returns to its original condition. Mom sits across from me, smiling, her hand tenderly resting on my own. The lights have returned and the radio at the back of the restaurant is melodiously humming out a muffled tune. I don't even try to hide my shock, which mom cocks her head at.
"Wesly? What's wrong now?"
"N-Nothing." I gasp out softly.
"Hello! Welcome in!" the server next to us erupts into her routine, making me jump, "What can I get started for you two?"
Mom greets her with a smile and begins listing off her order, but I just keep staring at her across the table. That wasn't déjà vu or some sort of PTSD from a dream. That was a full-blown hallucination. But with the feeling at the back of my neck stronger than ever before, I can't help but think that it's something much, much worse.
{Next Part}
2024.03.03 22:10 North-Distance-3214 am I wrong for feeling upset about my old ex friend/ bullies trying to be close with my current best friend? (I wrote this in a rush so I apologize for the run on sentences and shit punctuation)
I know I shouldn’t care but i had horrible friends who would bully me when I was 12-13. It had me feeling so low and alone to the point where I’d feel disgusting about my body (apparently it’s fine to size shame when it’s about being too skinny right?) and would shower in a tank top of some sort so I wouldn’t have to see all of my body. I also started to self harm because I felt so worthless, as if them treating me this way was MY fault. They would call me all sorts of names and talk shit behind my back,and even talk about me to their guy friends as if I was the most disgusting creature ever. The teachers didn’t do jack shit because they’re losers who like taking sides with the popular kids. When I told them I’d gotten my period they started spreading lies about my hygiene and saying how disgusting I was. I was 12. They would make me their target so the popular kids would take them into their group and what’s crazy is that it worked. There’s been so many other moments I just can’t bring up because it just brings me back to such a dark place. My parents weren’t home a lot so I had nobody to talk to, this just made me an even easier target for them and I just feel so sick to my stomach knowing there’s children that are capable of being this sick. 11 years later and I finally managed to build up some confidence, look very different and have better friends who actually look at me as human.
So fast forward a few weeks ago, me and my current friend were on a walk, we’ll call her Emma. Emma says “isn’t that Mona?” (My main bully) and waves at her from a distance. I find out they know each other and follow each other on instagram (Emma didn’t know the extent of what Mona put me through). I was baffled because this isn’t the first time one of my ex friends (who chose to target me and be a fucking bully just because they’re hanging out with the popular crew) was trying to befriend my closest friend.
When Emma told me she saw mona and waved at her, I was shocked because I wasn’t expecting my bully ex friend to be anywhere near my neighborhood let alone right in front of us. I say “oh….nah fuck her” and explained to Emma what happened between us so she knew this wasn’t just me hating, this was coming from a place of hurt and betrayal and years of suffering. Now I understand we’re 11 years past this but in this scenario I’m not gonna be the person to “forgive for my own peace” because that’s fucking whack and more off putting that someone so young was capable of being this fucked up and evil to someone they considered “a friend”. Maybe I’m not as mature or maybe she can’t grasp the genuine pain I was put through but tell me why Emma said “you’re only hurting yourself by thinking about the past, you should forgive her internally for your peace of mind”. It’s not bad advice but it felt weird and not fitting for this situation. I felt like for someone who I considered a best friend to know what I was put through and then just say some yin yang ahh peace of mind BS was just a way for her to kind of push away my problems just so she could remain cordial with my bully Mona.
Im not in a good mindset and I know in a few hours I’ll probably be like “I was reaching” but this has been on my mind since I woke up even though it happened a few weeks ago and I don’t know how to feel. I know this may seem like petty drama but I just hate the person I become when I see the people from my past who’ve done me wrong. Especially when my only intention was to be their friend. I hate how innocent and dumb I was and if I had the confidence I do now things would’ve been much different. I just wish I’d done something about it. Seeing these people live their day to day lives without getting their karma and then seeing them try to be bestie-bestie with the people dearest to me feels like a slap to my fucking face. And that’s just how I feel right now. Maybe tomorrow it’ll be different who knows.
submitted by North-Distance-3214 to AITAH [link] [comments]
So fast forward a few weeks ago, me and my current friend were on a walk, we’ll call her Emma. Emma says “isn’t that Mona?” (My main bully) and waves at her from a distance. I find out they know each other and follow each other on instagram (Emma didn’t know the extent of what Mona put me through). I was baffled because this isn’t the first time one of my ex friends (who chose to target me and be a fucking bully just because they’re hanging out with the popular crew) was trying to befriend my closest friend.
When Emma told me she saw mona and waved at her, I was shocked because I wasn’t expecting my bully ex friend to be anywhere near my neighborhood let alone right in front of us. I say “oh….nah fuck her” and explained to Emma what happened between us so she knew this wasn’t just me hating, this was coming from a place of hurt and betrayal and years of suffering. Now I understand we’re 11 years past this but in this scenario I’m not gonna be the person to “forgive for my own peace” because that’s fucking whack and more off putting that someone so young was capable of being this fucked up and evil to someone they considered “a friend”. Maybe I’m not as mature or maybe she can’t grasp the genuine pain I was put through but tell me why Emma said “you’re only hurting yourself by thinking about the past, you should forgive her internally for your peace of mind”. It’s not bad advice but it felt weird and not fitting for this situation. I felt like for someone who I considered a best friend to know what I was put through and then just say some yin yang ahh peace of mind BS was just a way for her to kind of push away my problems just so she could remain cordial with my bully Mona.
Im not in a good mindset and I know in a few hours I’ll probably be like “I was reaching” but this has been on my mind since I woke up even though it happened a few weeks ago and I don’t know how to feel. I know this may seem like petty drama but I just hate the person I become when I see the people from my past who’ve done me wrong. Especially when my only intention was to be their friend. I hate how innocent and dumb I was and if I had the confidence I do now things would’ve been much different. I just wish I’d done something about it. Seeing these people live their day to day lives without getting their karma and then seeing them try to be bestie-bestie with the people dearest to me feels like a slap to my fucking face. And that’s just how I feel right now. Maybe tomorrow it’ll be different who knows.
2024.03.02 23:44 PresidentWerewolf Fantastic Four #44: Beatdown
Fantastic Four Volume III: Frightful Issue #44: Beatdown
Written by: u/PresidentWerewolf Edited by: u/Predaplant and u/VoidKiller826
Previous Issue
35 Years Ago
“Did you know Elvis had a twin brother?”
Startled, Dr. Nathaniel Richards looked up suddenly from his book. Before him stood a lanky man in a tweed suit, complete with Oxfords and a bowtie. His short-cropped, dark hair, which was graying at the temples, framed a keen, hawkish face. He was smiling expectantly as if there was a second half to what he had said, a joke that Nathaniel was supposed to finish. For an instant, it felt like Nathaniel was looking into some sort of strange mirror. Something in the visitor’s features resembled his own, not to mention their attire was more than merely similar.
“My office hours ended some time ago,” Nathaniel said. “Surely, you were informed by a departmental assistant that I do not entertain visitors after three.”
The man shrugged. “I bypassed the front desk, and I know about your alone time. That’s why I came when I did, so that we aren’t disturbed by some student.”
Nathaniel sighed and slowly closed his book. “Very well. You don’t seem like the type to leave without having your say. Is this about the Sigma construct?”
The man shook his head with a little laugh. “No. The problems with the Sigma construct will come out in time. For now, it’s a good statistical approximation. I–”
Nathaniel pulled his spectacles off with one hand, and he shook them towards his visitor. “Now see here. Approximation?”
The visitor put up his hands in mock defense. “With a non-uniform elasticity, yes. With a delta axis, yes! You already know that.”
Nathaniel had been half out of his seat, but now he slumped back down into it, grumbling unhappily. “Of course I know it. How do you know it? A delta axis is hardly–”
“Common,” the man said. “It’s not common, no. And I said it was a good approximation.”
Nathaniel nodded. “Well, it hardly seems reason enough to bother me so, mister…”
The man stepped forward and put out a hand. “Richards. Reed Richards.”
Nathaniel’s eyes widened slightly. Similar face. Same last name.
Reed chuckled. “We look a little alike, right? And listen to this: my dad is named Nathaniel.”
Nathaniel let out a longer sigh as he replaced his glasses. “Are you going to tell me that we are family, then? Some second cousin in common, perhaps? If this is a prank, please, save us both the time, and–”
“No, no, not a prank. We are related, in a manner of speaking.”
“Hmph. Excellent,” Nathaniel said dryly. “Well, I have a postal address. And office hours. If you don’t mind,” he said, gesturing to the door.
“Yes, well, none of those methods would have been sufficient,” Reed said. “Tell me, Dr. Richards, what do you know about the multiverse?”
Nathaniel surged from his seat, swept past Reed, and shut his office door with a rush of air and a bang. He turned to face his visitor directly and gave him a long look over the tops of his glasses. He was expecting an aura of pipe smoke and old books, but he smelled nothing. He had expected the telltale shrug and smirk of the Classics Department stalwart, but this man held himself readily, cockily. His knuckles were nicked with small scars...
“You’re an engineer,” Nathaniel said accusingly, but then he chuckled lightly. “Tell me, did Bellweather put you up to this? He never did think I was hazed properly.”
“No. No one put me up to this,” Reed said. Then, he leaned down and whispered something into Nathaniel’s ear.
Nathaniel’s eyes went wide as his face drained of color. He stumbled back towards his desk and leaned on it clumsily, glaring at Reed with a mixture of fear and suspicion. “How...”
“You told me,” Reed said simply. “Well, not you.”
Nathaniel straightened his suit and smoothed his hair as he composed himself. He went back to his seat and settled into it, letting all of the familiar creaks and pops the chair made lend a sense of normalcy to the room that is so desperately needed.
“Go on,” he said. “Explain yourself.”
Reed suddenly seemed excited more than he seemed amused. Still, he spoke at an even clip. This man was a teacher. “I take it you are familiar with multiverse theory, then.”
Nathaniel nodded.
“Well, I have good news. It’s not a theory.”
“I surmised that much,” Nathaniel said, “and I am letting you speak because if this is a prank, then it is transcendent.”
Reed chuckled. “If you want to see a prankster, you should meet– well, never mind. As I said, the basics. Multiple universes. Multiple Nathaniels.”
“Which still doesn’t explain the single Reed before me.”
“That takes a little bit of digging. You are familiar with the normal distribution, yes?”
“Some call it the Bell Curve here, where a random sample will coalesce around its mean. You will find that an elementary concept in this… universe.”
“Right,” Reed said. “Mine, too. But, consider applying it orthogonally to an individual across the multiverse.”
Nathaniel nodded eagerly. “I see. Yes, I see! There would be a… a period of time, correct? A period of time where an individual would be most common.”
“Exactly,” Reed said, snapping his fingers. “There will be a time when most of the Reed Richards of the multiverse will be born and live their lives.”
“Hence… your visit? Are we in this time now?”
“No,” Reed said, shaking his head. “Not yet.”
“You’re an outlier, then,” Nathaniel whispered.
“Now you’re getting it. I’m early. Not as early as some, but certainly a statistical outlier. As for my visit? I’ve met a few other Reeds, and I’ve met a lot of Nathaniels. I even met a very early Franklin. I suppose there is no easy way to say this, Nathaniel, but I haven’t come today with a simple, friendly greeting.”
“Today, I come to you with a warning.”
Now
Nathaniel Richards fired a plasma-laced blast of power at Reed, who ducked it easily. The blast shot behind him and blew a hole in the wall of the lab, sending debris flying out and sunlight streaming in.
“I’ve got it!” Johnny shouted, as he darted outside to catch the falling bits of metal.
“What the hell are you doing, Dad?” Reed shouted.
Nathaniel’s whole body blazed with the same strange power they had witnessed before. It blew up around him like a whirlwind, tearing tiles from the high ceiling and throwing them around him.
“I’m proving to my spit-smear of a son that he’s a spit-smear of a son!”
Reed looked at him with despairing sadness. “Is that all this is? This whole thing is about you and me?”
“If that was all it was, I would have just strangled you in your crib,” Nathaniel growled.
“Dad, I know about the anomaly, about how the Negative Zone split you. I can help.”
“Your help is the last thing I need. Last chance, Reed. Hand Franklin to me, and you keep the rest of your family.”
Reed looked back at his father grimly. He reached with one hand and yanked the metal line of technology from the other arm. As soon as it was free, it reshaped itself, changing into a staff. Reed held it up over his head, and the crackling energy still dancing about the portal instantly flew to the staff, illuminating it with an unearthly glow.
“Dad, whatever happened, whatever went wrong, I’ve got no problem beating it out of you.”
“Careful, Ben!” Sue was sweating with the effort of holding up so many forcefields. She was blocking the older Franklin’s power as he tried to assault Ben, John, and herself, but it was a losing game. He was more powerful, and he kept finding a way around her defenses. Was this what her son would be like? Would little Franklin wield this power some day?
Ben fired at the insectoid version of Franklin, but the energy beam peeled away in midair. “Not sure what ta do about this one, Suzie. My powers a’ clobberin’ ain’t what they used ta be.”
John Storm, Johnny’s older, more experienced double, was keeping most of Franklin’s attention. The two of them battled fiercely, both of them throwing fire and energy in huge sparks that shook the floor.
“My hope was to assimilate you all,” the older Franklin said in his odd, monotone voice. “I think I will kill you instead.”
“No!” young Franklin cried from behind his mother.
“Yes! Cosmic radiation gave you these powers. How much can you withstand?” A yellow glow suffused the air around the battle. John Storm slowed in the air, and he flew away, barely dodging an energy blast.
“Sue!” John exclaimed. “You can’t block this! You need to get back!”
A shockwave of force shot out from the older Franklin in all directions, smashing Sue’s forcefields and throwing everyone to the floor. Sue cried out in pain and collapsed in a heap. Ben went rolling away, cosmic energy seeming to stick onto his body in patches. John’s flame went out and he fell to the floor.
“Come on!” he shouted. His flame lit up and then went back out. “Flame! Flame on!”
Franklin’s insectoid jaw clacked menacingly as he approached the injured hero. “Do it!” he laughed. “Burn me, if you can!”
A huge jet of flame hit him from behind, and Franklin was sent screeching across the room, tumbling head over heels. Johnny didn’t let up, throwing arcs of flame and exploding fireballs one after the other, destroying the floor around Franklin so he couldn’t find his balance.
“You want fire? You got it!” Johnny shouted. He concentrated, and his flame grew brighter, the heat around him intensifying. He closed in on the older Franklin, his body a blast furnace, his face a mask of anger. “I don’t want to do this,” he said, “but I don’t think there’s any way to save you, kiddo.”
Johnny’s hand blazed like the sun, and he leveled it at Franklin. “I’m so sorry.”
The insectoid features on the older Franklin’s face vanished and were suddenly replaced with the clean, human face of a Franklin as a child. “Uncle Johnny!” he cried out.
Johnny Storm hesitated.
The insect jaws returned in a flash, and Johnny was hit with a wave of power point blank. He was thrown like a rocket, one broken arm flailing sickly at his side, while the evil Franklin cackled. He hit Johnny in the air again, and the Human Torch shot straight down, slamming into the floor, bouncing, and lying still.
“Who is next?” said the evil Franklin in a cruel voice. He got up and walked over to John Storm, who was still trying to restart his flame. “I will be glad to be rid of you both.”
“That was dirty!” Young Franklin stood by his mother, who had shielded him from the blast. “You stop it! Right now!”
The older Franklin stood slowly and appraised the boy. He let out a small laugh. “I am older, child. I have had my power longer. I was trained at the end of the Cosmic Control Rod itself.”
“Oh... oh yeah?” the smaller Franklin said. He had been hurt by the blast. His legs were shaking. He was terrified and barely on his feet. He stole a quick glance at his mother, unconscious at his side. “Well, I have something that you don’t.”
“And what is that?” The older Franklin’s jaws clacked with delight. His eyes began to glow.
“I have a big brother. I have Ben.”
“I was trained by Annihilus himself,” the older Franklin laughed. “What did your brother teach you?”
Young Franklin Richards gritted his teeth and clenched a fist. “How to take care of a bully.”
Behind the younger Franklin, a copy of the child appeared, made of pure energy and so large that it stooped inside the massive lab. It snarled down at the floor where the two Franklins faced each other. It pulled back one massive fist, and it roared with such power that the floor shook and the ceiling cracked. Reed and Nathaniel both stopped to stare at the scene.
“Take him out!” young Franklin yelled, and the colossus of power punched down. The older Franklin tried to defend himself, but the sheer force of the attack obliterated every one of his defenses. The blow flattened him, smashing him to the floor and on through it. The gigantic arm bore down, down through six floors, barreling the cosmic-powered fiend through steel plating, concrete, wood, and tile, until it left the broken teen in a twitching heap at the bottom.
Franklin fell to his knees, unable to believe he had really just done that. The gestalt faded behind him, and he could feel his control, fueled by his anger, fading away. He suddenly remembered Uncle Johnny, and he scrambled to his feet and ran to his side. Johnny was writhing weakly. So many of his bones were broken. The middle part of his body was bent at a slight, unnerving angle.
“I don’t know what to do! Mom! Uncle Ben!” Franklin yelled.
Johnny’s eyes focused on Franklin, and he forced a horrible smile. “You...got him good, kid–” He coughed, and blood spouted from his nose and mouth.
“Dad!” Franklin yelled. “Val!”
______________________________________________________-
Reed whacked his father with the staff again, this time staggering him with a blow to the shoulder. With each hit, more of the energy transferred from Nathaniel to the weapon. He was already dimming, while the staff was so bright its details could barely be seen.
“Give up!” Reed shouted. He slithered away from his father’s energy attack and came back around, hitting him in the small of his back and sending him to one knee. “I had plenty of time to analyze the power you use.”
Nathaniel tried to draw his energy closer, to concentrate it, but he couldn’t avoid Reed’s attacks, and he was slowing.
“We defeated your team,” Reed said, as he bashed Nathanial with a downward blow. “We faced your twisted versions of us.” He hit him again. “We saw the evil we could become.”
Nathaniel was panting. “Wait...Reed.” His armor was finally starting to crack, his vast power finally failing.
“It’s not going to work,” Reed said.
“You don’t know what’s out there!” Nathaniel roared, and he fired back, catching Reed by surprise. He took the chance and flew forward, punching as electric power jumped from his body in random, lethal sparks. “You’re the king of this little world, Reed, and you have no idea how small you are.”
Reed deflected the attack with a swipe. “Are you kidding?! We were out there, Dad. Nathan. We were out there for years. We fought the Badoon. We battled space pirates. We defeated a Herald of Galactus!”
Nathaniel stopped short. “You took down a Herald?”
The opening was all Reed needed. He hauled back and hit his father with a home run slugger, shattering his armor, sending pieces of it flying through the air and sending the old man rolling into the wall.
Nathaniel struggled to get up, but Reed put the end of the staff on the center of his chest. “You are done.”
Nathaniel fought for a second, but he had nothing left. He slumped back against the wall, as he thought of that day so long ago, before his marriage, before his family, before the entire universe had become so strange. He was fading out, the black edging his vision. Was this it? The end? It didn’t even seem to matter. It was becoming so clear in his mind that every day since he met that other Reed, every moment since the anomaly...
“Wasted,” he whispered.
“You’re telling me,” Reed huffed. He used a device on his gauntleted arm to quickly scan Nathaniel. “You’re going to be fine, Dad. You’re going to live, like it or not.”
Reed looked around the lab. The entire structure was damaged, probably beyond any sort of repair. With the wind blowing in from outside, with the hole in the floor– Franklin. Franklin was kneeling over Johnny. There was blood. Reed dashed for his brother-in-law, when one of the large screens on the wall came to life.
“Nathaniel never thought we would win,” said The Maker from the screen. Behind him, innumerable lights and screens blanked and flickered. “I knew it from the start!”
Reed stopped. “No! I thought...” he hadn’t thought anything. Nathaniel had taken his attention, and he had thought The Maker defeated. Instead, the old enemy had escaped, and now, what was he up to?
The screen changed, and it showed the exterior of a huge spaceship floating in the blackness of space. The camera zoomed out, revealing that it was parked in Earth’s orbit. Not far in the distance was Reed’s orbital lab.
“Reed, we both know there’s only room in this universe for one of us. All those years ago, I won! I already won. I--we replaced you! All of you! And now I can finish the job that we started.” The Maker leaned to the side. “Target the Baxter Building. Begin power up sequence.”
The screen went dark.
Reed stopped, frozen, staring at Johnny’s broken body.
“Go, Reed!” Ben yelled from behind him. “I’ll take care a’ the matchstick! Go get that guy!”
Reed wasted no more time. He ran to the portal he had used to bring his family back, and he touched the staff to it. Energy flowed into it, and the portal came to life. Reed jumped through it, and he was gone.
Next: The end of the circle
submitted by PresidentWerewolf to MarvelsNCU [link] [comments]
Written by: u/PresidentWerewolf Edited by: u/Predaplant and u/VoidKiller826
Previous Issue
35 Years Ago
“Did you know Elvis had a twin brother?”
Startled, Dr. Nathaniel Richards looked up suddenly from his book. Before him stood a lanky man in a tweed suit, complete with Oxfords and a bowtie. His short-cropped, dark hair, which was graying at the temples, framed a keen, hawkish face. He was smiling expectantly as if there was a second half to what he had said, a joke that Nathaniel was supposed to finish. For an instant, it felt like Nathaniel was looking into some sort of strange mirror. Something in the visitor’s features resembled his own, not to mention their attire was more than merely similar.
“My office hours ended some time ago,” Nathaniel said. “Surely, you were informed by a departmental assistant that I do not entertain visitors after three.”
The man shrugged. “I bypassed the front desk, and I know about your alone time. That’s why I came when I did, so that we aren’t disturbed by some student.”
Nathaniel sighed and slowly closed his book. “Very well. You don’t seem like the type to leave without having your say. Is this about the Sigma construct?”
The man shook his head with a little laugh. “No. The problems with the Sigma construct will come out in time. For now, it’s a good statistical approximation. I–”
Nathaniel pulled his spectacles off with one hand, and he shook them towards his visitor. “Now see here. Approximation?”
The visitor put up his hands in mock defense. “With a non-uniform elasticity, yes. With a delta axis, yes! You already know that.”
Nathaniel had been half out of his seat, but now he slumped back down into it, grumbling unhappily. “Of course I know it. How do you know it? A delta axis is hardly–”
“Common,” the man said. “It’s not common, no. And I said it was a good approximation.”
Nathaniel nodded. “Well, it hardly seems reason enough to bother me so, mister…”
The man stepped forward and put out a hand. “Richards. Reed Richards.”
Nathaniel’s eyes widened slightly. Similar face. Same last name.
Reed chuckled. “We look a little alike, right? And listen to this: my dad is named Nathaniel.”
Nathaniel let out a longer sigh as he replaced his glasses. “Are you going to tell me that we are family, then? Some second cousin in common, perhaps? If this is a prank, please, save us both the time, and–”
“No, no, not a prank. We are related, in a manner of speaking.”
“Hmph. Excellent,” Nathaniel said dryly. “Well, I have a postal address. And office hours. If you don’t mind,” he said, gesturing to the door.
“Yes, well, none of those methods would have been sufficient,” Reed said. “Tell me, Dr. Richards, what do you know about the multiverse?”
Nathaniel surged from his seat, swept past Reed, and shut his office door with a rush of air and a bang. He turned to face his visitor directly and gave him a long look over the tops of his glasses. He was expecting an aura of pipe smoke and old books, but he smelled nothing. He had expected the telltale shrug and smirk of the Classics Department stalwart, but this man held himself readily, cockily. His knuckles were nicked with small scars...
“You’re an engineer,” Nathaniel said accusingly, but then he chuckled lightly. “Tell me, did Bellweather put you up to this? He never did think I was hazed properly.”
“No. No one put me up to this,” Reed said. Then, he leaned down and whispered something into Nathaniel’s ear.
Nathaniel’s eyes went wide as his face drained of color. He stumbled back towards his desk and leaned on it clumsily, glaring at Reed with a mixture of fear and suspicion. “How...”
“You told me,” Reed said simply. “Well, not you.”
Nathaniel straightened his suit and smoothed his hair as he composed himself. He went back to his seat and settled into it, letting all of the familiar creaks and pops the chair made lend a sense of normalcy to the room that is so desperately needed.
“Go on,” he said. “Explain yourself.”
Reed suddenly seemed excited more than he seemed amused. Still, he spoke at an even clip. This man was a teacher. “I take it you are familiar with multiverse theory, then.”
Nathaniel nodded.
“Well, I have good news. It’s not a theory.”
“I surmised that much,” Nathaniel said, “and I am letting you speak because if this is a prank, then it is transcendent.”
Reed chuckled. “If you want to see a prankster, you should meet– well, never mind. As I said, the basics. Multiple universes. Multiple Nathaniels.”
“Which still doesn’t explain the single Reed before me.”
“That takes a little bit of digging. You are familiar with the normal distribution, yes?”
“Some call it the Bell Curve here, where a random sample will coalesce around its mean. You will find that an elementary concept in this… universe.”
“Right,” Reed said. “Mine, too. But, consider applying it orthogonally to an individual across the multiverse.”
Nathaniel nodded eagerly. “I see. Yes, I see! There would be a… a period of time, correct? A period of time where an individual would be most common.”
“Exactly,” Reed said, snapping his fingers. “There will be a time when most of the Reed Richards of the multiverse will be born and live their lives.”
“Hence… your visit? Are we in this time now?”
“No,” Reed said, shaking his head. “Not yet.”
“You’re an outlier, then,” Nathaniel whispered.
“Now you’re getting it. I’m early. Not as early as some, but certainly a statistical outlier. As for my visit? I’ve met a few other Reeds, and I’ve met a lot of Nathaniels. I even met a very early Franklin. I suppose there is no easy way to say this, Nathaniel, but I haven’t come today with a simple, friendly greeting.”
“Today, I come to you with a warning.”
Now
Nathaniel Richards fired a plasma-laced blast of power at Reed, who ducked it easily. The blast shot behind him and blew a hole in the wall of the lab, sending debris flying out and sunlight streaming in.
“I’ve got it!” Johnny shouted, as he darted outside to catch the falling bits of metal.
“What the hell are you doing, Dad?” Reed shouted.
Nathaniel’s whole body blazed with the same strange power they had witnessed before. It blew up around him like a whirlwind, tearing tiles from the high ceiling and throwing them around him.
“I’m proving to my spit-smear of a son that he’s a spit-smear of a son!”
Reed looked at him with despairing sadness. “Is that all this is? This whole thing is about you and me?”
“If that was all it was, I would have just strangled you in your crib,” Nathaniel growled.
“Dad, I know about the anomaly, about how the Negative Zone split you. I can help.”
“Your help is the last thing I need. Last chance, Reed. Hand Franklin to me, and you keep the rest of your family.”
Reed looked back at his father grimly. He reached with one hand and yanked the metal line of technology from the other arm. As soon as it was free, it reshaped itself, changing into a staff. Reed held it up over his head, and the crackling energy still dancing about the portal instantly flew to the staff, illuminating it with an unearthly glow.
“Dad, whatever happened, whatever went wrong, I’ve got no problem beating it out of you.”
“Careful, Ben!” Sue was sweating with the effort of holding up so many forcefields. She was blocking the older Franklin’s power as he tried to assault Ben, John, and herself, but it was a losing game. He was more powerful, and he kept finding a way around her defenses. Was this what her son would be like? Would little Franklin wield this power some day?
Ben fired at the insectoid version of Franklin, but the energy beam peeled away in midair. “Not sure what ta do about this one, Suzie. My powers a’ clobberin’ ain’t what they used ta be.”
John Storm, Johnny’s older, more experienced double, was keeping most of Franklin’s attention. The two of them battled fiercely, both of them throwing fire and energy in huge sparks that shook the floor.
“My hope was to assimilate you all,” the older Franklin said in his odd, monotone voice. “I think I will kill you instead.”
“No!” young Franklin cried from behind his mother.
“Yes! Cosmic radiation gave you these powers. How much can you withstand?” A yellow glow suffused the air around the battle. John Storm slowed in the air, and he flew away, barely dodging an energy blast.
“Sue!” John exclaimed. “You can’t block this! You need to get back!”
A shockwave of force shot out from the older Franklin in all directions, smashing Sue’s forcefields and throwing everyone to the floor. Sue cried out in pain and collapsed in a heap. Ben went rolling away, cosmic energy seeming to stick onto his body in patches. John’s flame went out and he fell to the floor.
“Come on!” he shouted. His flame lit up and then went back out. “Flame! Flame on!”
Franklin’s insectoid jaw clacked menacingly as he approached the injured hero. “Do it!” he laughed. “Burn me, if you can!”
A huge jet of flame hit him from behind, and Franklin was sent screeching across the room, tumbling head over heels. Johnny didn’t let up, throwing arcs of flame and exploding fireballs one after the other, destroying the floor around Franklin so he couldn’t find his balance.
“You want fire? You got it!” Johnny shouted. He concentrated, and his flame grew brighter, the heat around him intensifying. He closed in on the older Franklin, his body a blast furnace, his face a mask of anger. “I don’t want to do this,” he said, “but I don’t think there’s any way to save you, kiddo.”
Johnny’s hand blazed like the sun, and he leveled it at Franklin. “I’m so sorry.”
The insectoid features on the older Franklin’s face vanished and were suddenly replaced with the clean, human face of a Franklin as a child. “Uncle Johnny!” he cried out.
Johnny Storm hesitated.
The insect jaws returned in a flash, and Johnny was hit with a wave of power point blank. He was thrown like a rocket, one broken arm flailing sickly at his side, while the evil Franklin cackled. He hit Johnny in the air again, and the Human Torch shot straight down, slamming into the floor, bouncing, and lying still.
“Who is next?” said the evil Franklin in a cruel voice. He got up and walked over to John Storm, who was still trying to restart his flame. “I will be glad to be rid of you both.”
“That was dirty!” Young Franklin stood by his mother, who had shielded him from the blast. “You stop it! Right now!”
The older Franklin stood slowly and appraised the boy. He let out a small laugh. “I am older, child. I have had my power longer. I was trained at the end of the Cosmic Control Rod itself.”
“Oh... oh yeah?” the smaller Franklin said. He had been hurt by the blast. His legs were shaking. He was terrified and barely on his feet. He stole a quick glance at his mother, unconscious at his side. “Well, I have something that you don’t.”
“And what is that?” The older Franklin’s jaws clacked with delight. His eyes began to glow.
“I have a big brother. I have Ben.”
“I was trained by Annihilus himself,” the older Franklin laughed. “What did your brother teach you?”
Young Franklin Richards gritted his teeth and clenched a fist. “How to take care of a bully.”
Behind the younger Franklin, a copy of the child appeared, made of pure energy and so large that it stooped inside the massive lab. It snarled down at the floor where the two Franklins faced each other. It pulled back one massive fist, and it roared with such power that the floor shook and the ceiling cracked. Reed and Nathaniel both stopped to stare at the scene.
“Take him out!” young Franklin yelled, and the colossus of power punched down. The older Franklin tried to defend himself, but the sheer force of the attack obliterated every one of his defenses. The blow flattened him, smashing him to the floor and on through it. The gigantic arm bore down, down through six floors, barreling the cosmic-powered fiend through steel plating, concrete, wood, and tile, until it left the broken teen in a twitching heap at the bottom.
Franklin fell to his knees, unable to believe he had really just done that. The gestalt faded behind him, and he could feel his control, fueled by his anger, fading away. He suddenly remembered Uncle Johnny, and he scrambled to his feet and ran to his side. Johnny was writhing weakly. So many of his bones were broken. The middle part of his body was bent at a slight, unnerving angle.
“I don’t know what to do! Mom! Uncle Ben!” Franklin yelled.
Johnny’s eyes focused on Franklin, and he forced a horrible smile. “You...got him good, kid–” He coughed, and blood spouted from his nose and mouth.
“Dad!” Franklin yelled. “Val!”
______________________________________________________-
Reed whacked his father with the staff again, this time staggering him with a blow to the shoulder. With each hit, more of the energy transferred from Nathaniel to the weapon. He was already dimming, while the staff was so bright its details could barely be seen.
“Give up!” Reed shouted. He slithered away from his father’s energy attack and came back around, hitting him in the small of his back and sending him to one knee. “I had plenty of time to analyze the power you use.”
Nathaniel tried to draw his energy closer, to concentrate it, but he couldn’t avoid Reed’s attacks, and he was slowing.
“We defeated your team,” Reed said, as he bashed Nathanial with a downward blow. “We faced your twisted versions of us.” He hit him again. “We saw the evil we could become.”
Nathaniel was panting. “Wait...Reed.” His armor was finally starting to crack, his vast power finally failing.
“It’s not going to work,” Reed said.
“You don’t know what’s out there!” Nathaniel roared, and he fired back, catching Reed by surprise. He took the chance and flew forward, punching as electric power jumped from his body in random, lethal sparks. “You’re the king of this little world, Reed, and you have no idea how small you are.”
Reed deflected the attack with a swipe. “Are you kidding?! We were out there, Dad. Nathan. We were out there for years. We fought the Badoon. We battled space pirates. We defeated a Herald of Galactus!”
Nathaniel stopped short. “You took down a Herald?”
The opening was all Reed needed. He hauled back and hit his father with a home run slugger, shattering his armor, sending pieces of it flying through the air and sending the old man rolling into the wall.
Nathaniel struggled to get up, but Reed put the end of the staff on the center of his chest. “You are done.”
Nathaniel fought for a second, but he had nothing left. He slumped back against the wall, as he thought of that day so long ago, before his marriage, before his family, before the entire universe had become so strange. He was fading out, the black edging his vision. Was this it? The end? It didn’t even seem to matter. It was becoming so clear in his mind that every day since he met that other Reed, every moment since the anomaly...
“Wasted,” he whispered.
“You’re telling me,” Reed huffed. He used a device on his gauntleted arm to quickly scan Nathaniel. “You’re going to be fine, Dad. You’re going to live, like it or not.”
Reed looked around the lab. The entire structure was damaged, probably beyond any sort of repair. With the wind blowing in from outside, with the hole in the floor– Franklin. Franklin was kneeling over Johnny. There was blood. Reed dashed for his brother-in-law, when one of the large screens on the wall came to life.
“Nathaniel never thought we would win,” said The Maker from the screen. Behind him, innumerable lights and screens blanked and flickered. “I knew it from the start!”
Reed stopped. “No! I thought...” he hadn’t thought anything. Nathaniel had taken his attention, and he had thought The Maker defeated. Instead, the old enemy had escaped, and now, what was he up to?
The screen changed, and it showed the exterior of a huge spaceship floating in the blackness of space. The camera zoomed out, revealing that it was parked in Earth’s orbit. Not far in the distance was Reed’s orbital lab.
“Reed, we both know there’s only room in this universe for one of us. All those years ago, I won! I already won. I--we replaced you! All of you! And now I can finish the job that we started.” The Maker leaned to the side. “Target the Baxter Building. Begin power up sequence.”
The screen went dark.
Reed stopped, frozen, staring at Johnny’s broken body.
“Go, Reed!” Ben yelled from behind him. “I’ll take care a’ the matchstick! Go get that guy!”
Reed wasted no more time. He ran to the portal he had used to bring his family back, and he touched the staff to it. Energy flowed into it, and the portal came to life. Reed jumped through it, and he was gone.
Next: The end of the circle
2024.03.02 02:19 critical_courtney [A Bargain for Wings] — Chapter Eleven (sequel to The Fae Queen's Pet)
![[A Bargain for Wings] — Chapter Eleven (sequel to The Fae Queen's Pet)](https://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/NnB69fv6uPdsypCdGajK8-OsZXbi5Oc1tkZjow7L0wY.jpg "[A Bargain for Wings] — Chapter Eleven (sequel to The Fae Queen's Pet)") | submitted by critical_courtney to redditserials [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/s2vu5oc9otlc1.jpg?width=1410&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=eaa99ebd75faaa99699606544a1152fc3c31b597 Previous Chapter My Discord Buy me a cup of coffee (if you want) Chapter Eleven: The Crone’s home was. . . surprisingly human in decor. Where I expected a jar of eyeballs or chicken kidneys sat a bookshelf of little teapots. Where I expected a cauldron, I found a fireplace with several photos of people. They appeared to be a small Black family. And where I expected a large wall of broomsticks and wands, I found a small shelf of cleaning supplies, rags, and a mop. Aromas of coffee and roasted nuts filled the air as I looked around a large open living room with plenty of space between its heavy wooden furniture, all covered with crocheted cushions with patterns of yellow and red. Bay windows revealed Rascal outside in the front yard giggling and mad with power as he used Ayks’ spell card to become invisible and dive behind bushes just before people walked by on the street. Long white curtains were tied off at the sides of each window. Opposite the bay windows stood a large kitchen with a wood stove, what appeared to be a wooden ice box, rich oak cabinets, and large shelves that served as a pantry covered in different breads, cookies, boxes of tea, dried pasta, honey, and more. And sitting at a round table covered in gray candles and a matching cloth was. . . an older woman with two cups of steaming tea that smelled of chamomile. Her white curly hair was cut short and adorned with an array of colored beads. The woman’s umber skin was mostly covered by a navy sweater with the words “University of Northern Maryland” embroidered on the front, along with a flying duck. She wore a pair of black sweatpants and grabbed a wooden cane with a rubber stopper on the end to stand as Ayks walked into the home. The Crone wears. . . sweats? I stared, raising an eyebrow. It was then I noticed her ears, round as mine had been before Sylva stole my body. And I began to admit to myself this wasn’t the image of a Crone I’d expected when my teacher announced today’s trip to Perth. “Ayks. . . right on time as usual. It’s good to see you, my old friend,” the Crone said walking over with a slight limp. Her face lit up as she spoke to the satyr, and I couldn’t help but smile. She was so warm. This was the face of someone without many worries, each wrinkle adorning her cheeks and below her eyes a sign of a long life lived, an extended path walked with still a few steps left in the journey. To my eyes, the Crone appeared to be at least 80. But this was Faerie, and I had no idea how that impacted aging. “Good to see you, too, Jada. I always look forward to our weekly game. How’s your leg?” my teacher asked, looking down at the Crone’s right knee. “Most days, I barely feel it, same as usual. And on days it does decide to fuss, I just boil those big leaves you send me, wrap them around it, and the pain leaves like a July thunderstorm that has better places to be. Oh! Who is the little one you’ve brought with you?” Jada’s brown eyes looked my way, and I flashed her a gentle smile accompanied by a soft wave. “My apologies for not properly introducing her. This is my new student, Anola. She’ll be learning magic from me, and I figured meeting the Crone would be a perfect first lesson for her.” I bowed my head slightly and said, “It’s nice to meet you.” Jada’s face was only confused for a moment before it gave way to a boisterous laugh and bemused grin. “Oh, ‘the Crone,’ am I? Tell me something, satyr. I’ve lived to be 127 here in Faerie, but you’re centuries older than I am. How did I wind up the Crone, hmmm? I’m practically a college student compared to your dusty bones,” Jada said, lightly poking Ayks’ belly with her cane. “Ha, I’d never imply you were a decrepit old witch to your face. It’s merely a false title I use for others to trick them into thinking I regularly visit a wise and powerful old fae with millennia of wisdom at her fingertips. Nobody asks questions when you say you’re going to visit the Crone. They just nod somberly and assume that’s a normal thing the royal arcanist does.” Jada continued to grin as she looked from Ayks back to me. She walked over toward the table and tripped over a footstool none of us saw coming until it was too late. As the Crone plummeted toward a broken hip after meeting an unforgiving hardwood floor, I gasped. But Ayks made no move to catch her. Just before she made contact with the ground, Jada’s wrist glowed blue, and I spotted the beginnings of a tattoo as her sleeve raised upward from the motion. That same light engulfed her body and gradually stopped her abrupt descent. Then, as though the Crone were a teapot that’d fallen off a shelf, the light seemed to gently raise her back up, feet right on the floor once more. In a matter of seconds, the ordeal was over, and she was safe once more. My runeseer eye kicked into gear as the glamour began to fade, and I spotted a sigil under her sleeve. With a few more seconds of staring, my brain told me this was a balancing spell crafted and tattooed onto Jada’s wrist by my teacher. Her glamour was infused in the marking, and whenever Jada started to fall, it caught her and carefully stood her upright again. While I was amazed at the spell work, it wasn’t something I expected someone with the title of “Crone” to require. Did fae grow old and risk falls like mortals did? I hadn’t a clue. But Jada just chuckled and looked back at us as she sat down. “I swear, Ayks. Your magic saves me from a busted tibia at least three times a week.” My teacher placed her hand on Jada’s tablecloth and motioned for me to climb down. I walked down her arm like the world’s strangest escalator and stepped onto the table before me while my teacher went to grab some cookies from the pantry. “Ope, I always forget your sweet tooth. And here I was thinking I was ahead of the game by having tea brewed for our game,” Jada said, rubbing her weathered hands together. She walked over to a shelf and fetched a tin of cookies that appeared homemade. I spotted frosted sugar on top of each, and my mouth watered a little. Jada also walked over to her sewing kit, fetched a thimble, washed it with soap, and then poured a dollop of steaming tea into the container, setting it before me. I marveled at the ingenuity. She didn’t even seem shocked to have a tiny woman at her table. “Thank you,” I said, taking a small sip. It was perfectly earthy and creamy. All I could do was close my eyes and sigh, finding myself strangely at peace. This home was cozy and not at all what I expected when I heard we were visiting the Crone. My eyes fell upon Jada again as she sat with a small “huff.” Ayks walked over toward a bookshelf and pulled out a nondescript box while Jada placed the cookie tin off to the side. I smelled traces of sugar and cinnamon wafting through the air to greet me, and my mouth watered. Sitting down at the table, my teacher opened the box and pulled out a chess set, the board a polished wooden surface with grains cut perfectly to the point that Ron Swanson would nod in approval upon seeing them. “Jada, while I’m setting up our game, why don’t you tell Anola your story, how you came to live in Faerie? I can tell she has a thousand questions but is trying her best to keep them all in out of some mortal sense of politeness.” My cheeks burned at that, and I scowled. Fuck you, teach. I’ll show you mortal politeness. I’ll polite my two-centimeter foot right up your ass, I thought. Or I would. . . if her ass wouldn’t swallow me whole at this size. Lady Ayks smiled. “You’d best get started before my apprentice works up the nerve to say some of the nasty things I’d wager are rattling through her head right now,” the arcanist said, pulling out a black pawn that appeared to be carved from crystal. My jaw dropped at the intricate detail of the chess piece as I ignored Ayks to avoid becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy. Each of the chess pieces was almost as tall as I was. I thought they were pretty big for standard chess pieces. The squares on the board were as well. Maybe that makes them easier to see or hang on to, I thought, shrugging and turning back to Jada as she cleared her throat and took a sip of her tea. “Honestly, my story is pretty short. As you can probably guess, I’m originally from Maryland. That’s what they call the land where I lived. It’s a smaller piece of our nation that we call a state.” I giggled at the explanation. “I know states work. I’m originally from Washington.” Her eyes widened at this. “My my. I didn’t expect a fae to be from my world. I expected they all came from Faerie,” Jada said. My teacher pulled out a crystal rook that I again paused to marvel at. I could see each brick in the castle tower, as well as chips where the wall had been worn away by weather or attacks. Well — fictional weather or attacks that occurred in Chess World. “My new student will share her story after you tell her yours. I suspect you each have at least one thing in common,” Ayks said, sneaking a glance down at me. There was that warm smile again on her face. Our host had a way of looking at you that just made you want to drop everything and sit on the couch with her for hours talking about gardening or a book you were enjoying. “Well, in that case, I can’t wait to hear your story, Anola,” Jada said. “Anyway, I just have one son. He’s. . . um — well.” She paused as a frustrated look overtook her warm smile. Her lips quirked to match her frown. After a few seconds of silence, she waved her hand and shook her head. “Anyway, I have a son. I guess he’s a bit of a worrier. When I took a fall at the spry young age of 71, he ignored my objections and put me in a nursing home.” I gasped as my teacher finished setting up her side of the board. “I know. Imagine that. One fall in 71 years, and he lost his damn mind. And the nursing home he could afford with my health insurance and Social Security wasn’t great. I think he came to visit me when he could, but I found myself quite miserable. The thing the movies and TV shows never seem to get right about nursing homes is the level of isolation.” Cocking my head to the side as Ayks placed a giant cookie beside me on the table cloth and shrank it, I waited for Jada to explain herself. “It’s lonely, sure. But there’s more to loneliness than people not coming to visit you. There’s a sense of being cut off from the world, of knowing this unfamiliar and sterilized place they call your home is where you’ll take your last breath in months or years or if you’re unfortunate enough. . . decades.” Jada paused her depressing story to take a sip of tea. Then she started setting her chess pieces up. The woman spoke while she worked. “You can’t leave. And our nursing home didn’t have the funds to take us out on trips to the grocery store, the theater, or nearby restaurants. Knowing that metal door with the dusty windows is what separates you from the rest of the world is the most crushing realization of all. That’s the isolation that’ll kill your heart faster than high blood pressure or cholesterol.” As she spoke, Jada’s face fell, and her hands trembled a little bit at memories of her life before arriving in Faerie. And where I expected the real horrors to begin at her first steps into Faerie, it seemed like the terrifying part of her story the beginning. “Of course, when you’re most desperate is when fae seem to appear if they’re going to,” she mumbled, dropping a rook. I heard it shatter on the floor, and she gasped. Lady Ayks rose quickly from her chair and fetched a broom and a dustpan. “It’s okay, Jada. I got it.” “I’m so sorry, dear. That part of the story always gets me. And these pieces are so lovely. I wish I hadn’t done that,” she said. My teacher shook her head. “Not to worry,” she said. “Accidents happen. If I had a gold coin for every piece of glass I dropped in my arcane study, I’d be rich enough to buy Featherstone. I’ll make another and bring it next week.” I’d just put the cookie in my mouth and started chewing, noticing for the first time there were tiny chunks of chocolate in the treat. While I made yummy noises with my mouth, Ayks called my name. “Anola, would you be so kind?” the arcanist asked. I just blinked and watched her point at the chessboard to the spot where the rook would’ve gone on Jada’s side. You’ve got to be fucking kidding me, I thought. But as Ayks raised an eyebrow, I stifled a sigh and walked onto the board, past pieces that were all set up and ready for the showdown. “Thank you, dear,” Jada said with another pleasant grin that left me suddenly not caring about being made into a game piece. I could no sooner be angry with her than I could with my own grandmother, god rest her soul. I took my spot among the chess pieces and tried to remember how the game worked. What would Beth Harmon do? I thought, shrugging and waiting for instructions. Eh, fuck it. Jada will tell me where to move and when. While they each thought over their opening moves, I happened to glance over at the wall because a reflection of the light caught my eye. It was sunlight, now high enough in the sky to touch the glass of a framed certificate on cream-colored paper. In a bold serif font right above a raised seal were the words, “U.S. Chess Championship Winner 1964.” Beside it hung another framed document with a similar design and lettering. It contained the same words and was apparently won in 1966. Jada’s name was printed on each certificate, along with a signature from the president of the U.S. Chess Federation. Turning back to our host, I could only gasp. She merely winked and said nothing. “You can have the first move, Ayks,” Jada said, shrugging like it wouldn’t matter. “Anyway, that’s when an elven man decided to pay me a visit. Nobody else seemed to notice him in the facility, which was my first red flag that something strange was going on. Visitors were heavily scrutinized at our facility. He introduced himself as Beselman and offered me a bargain.” Images of yesterday came flying back into my mind, Sylva showing up without warning in my changing room, offering me a chance to be rid of my problems in exchange for something I wouldn’t even miss. “Oh, Jada. You didn’t,” I gasped, hands covering my lips. Her eyes softened, and she sighed. “I did. He offered to get me out of the facility and promised all he’d take in exchange were a few memories, things I hadn’t thought of in a while.” Horrible scenes played out in my mind of an elf digging their fingers into a human brain, rifling around the pink goo like a filing cabinet until they found what they were looking for. I’m sure that wasn’t how it happened. But I flinched all the same. Ayks made her first move, pushing a pawn forward two spaces into the board’s center. I had no idea if this was a good opening. I didn’t retain much in the way of strategy. My teacher said nothing as Jada continued her story. “Desperate to rejoin the world, I accepted Beselman’s terms. My head only hurt for a few minutes, and it was no worse than the occasional migraine I got after pollen grew thick in the air. Took me decades to realize the memories he stole were of my son. I hadn’t been thinking of him much at the time, I guess. And I can’t even remember what he looks like now.” Ayks moved another pawn, and Jada moved a knight that wasn’t far from the square I stood on. “Did Beselman keep your bargain?” I asked, sheepishly, putting my hands together as tension rose like bile in the bottom of my throat. Nodding and taking her attention from the board, Jada turned back to me. “Oh, the shifty elf got me out of the retirement village. And before I could ask where he was taking me, he dumped my butt in Faerie, vanishing with a cruel, mocking laugh. I’d have whacked the point right out of his ears if I was given the chance. Instead, I wandered through a dense forest for hours, trying to find a road or a path.” The arcanist took a pawn from the board with a subtle smile. “One of these days you’ll learn that the first capture doesn’t amount to a hill of beans, Ayks,” Jada mocked my teacher, rubbing her chin. “You’re just lucky I let you win on occasion out of gratitude for finding me just before I collapsed from hunger and bringing me to Perth.” My neck spun toward the royal arcanist so fast that I heard tiny joints pop under my skull. That subtle smile on Ayks’ mouth had grown an inch. “And one of these days you’ll learn that being a mortal chess master matters little in the presence of ageless elves. Some of us have been around since before humans even invented the game of chess,” she scoffed. Jada grinned. “Not you, though. You’re about half a millennium younger than chess,” our host said, popping her neck to the right. Pretending to blush, my teacher gave our host an “aw shucks,” gesture. “Anola, dear. Will you please move forward to take that bishop?” I did as I was told and gently pushed that piece off the board. Hoping Ayks would take revenge with her knight and let me sit down to eat another cookie, I found no such reprieve. “So,” I eventually asked. “My teacher got you set up here?” That warm smile again. “She did. And it’s a real hoot living amongst a bunch of fae who believe me to be some ancient Crone. Rascal always helps me disguise myself with glamour until I look like Witch Hazel about to cook Bugs in her stew. He walks me to the market, to the butcher, and to the lake for picnics. He’s so sweet. And his little Secret Service act is adorable.” The way Jada’s face beamed as she talked about the Satyrs Three was contagious because I finally noticed my own growing smile as I listened. My teacher moved her remaining bishop and took another pawn from our host. Jada didn’t seem to notice. “Toss is such a sweetie, accompanying me on little hikes through the forest and singing me songs when I’m not feeling well. And I’ve never had a better puzzle helper than Tumble. They’re the best kids I could ask for to keep me company,” Jada said, taking the remaining bishop from Ayks. My teacher frowned, but as I turned to look at her with a questioning expression, wondering why she’d bother setting all this up for Jada, the satyr flashed me a subtle wink. “It seems we do have something in common. I, too, was given a raw bargain.” Jada cocked her head slightly as she turned to me. “I used to be human. Recently so. I was tall enough to reach the top cupboards without a footstool. And now look at me. My teacher has to shrink cookies for me to munch on, and I drink from a thimble,” I said with a drop in my tone. It was hard to hide the bitterness in my chest as I spoke, a clod of spikes buried under my ribs and poking at the heart when I least expected it. Our host’s smile disappeared, and I was given a look of sympathy. Perhaps my first since arriving in Faerie. “What happened, dear?” she asked, taking a knight from Lady Ayks. “I was tricked on my wedding day. Like you, I was desperate to escape. And a piskie took advantage of that, offering me a bargain that was too good to be true,” I muttered. She asked me to move right two squares, so I did. That made my teacher scoff and scratch her curved horns. “Oh my. Were you about to marry a man you didn’t like?” I smiled. “Well. . . yes. Although there aren’t really any men that I do like. I prefer the fairer sex for — well, sex,” I stammered, blushing as I remembered how Anola had pressed me against a wall of pillows to explore my mouth with her tongue. Clearing my throat, I looked down at the board, hoping my cheeks weren’t burning. If I expected any homophobia from Jada, she had none to offer, merely clicking her tongue and shaking her head before saying, “Believe me. If loving a woman was an option when I was your age, I would’ve walked through that door in a heartbeat. Of course, then I wouldn’t have had my son. So — it’s best not to spend time pondering on what might have been.” “What do you mean?” I asked. She moved me back one space with a gentle brush of her hand. Seeing her weathered palms and the lines that stretched out in every direction on her hand brought a rare sort of introspection to the top of my mind. While my teacher pondered her next move, Jada’s brown eye found mine, and she said, “I’m over 90 years old, Anola. I may not look it because the magic here has slowed my aging a little bit, but I feel it in my bones all the same. You don’t live this long without recognizing all actions have consequences. And you don’t find joy in tomorrow by spending your minutes pining for a different yesterday.” That was just cryptic enough that, for a moment, I began to ponder if Jada was, in fact, the Crone my teacher spoke of. I shook my head. My teacher put up a good fight, even taking Jada’s queen, which our host sacrificed to keep me safe on the board. But eventually, the royal arcanist tipped her king in defeat. The game was over. “That was a great match,” Lady Ayks said, smiling. “Good victory.” The two players shook hands with a giggle, and I saw Jada yawn wide as my teacher began to clean up the table. “Well, I don’t mean to be a bad host, but I’m afraid all this reflection and victory had taken it out of me. I might just need to lie down for a little nap,” Jada said, stretching as much as her back would allow, arms high in the air. My teacher bowed her head. “Until next week, then. Thank you for welcoming me into your home once more. As always, the tea and cookies were delightful,” Ayks said, putting away the game box. I didn’t quite know what to do, so I bowed my head slightly and squeaked out a small, “Thank you.” Jada stood and nodded in my direction. “I hope you learned whatever it was your teacher wanted today. And if not, then I hope at the very least our little game wasn’t too boring.” I smiled. “I had a great time. Thanks for having me,” I said. Laying her hand flat on the table, the royal arcanist waited for me to climb up to her shoulder again. And then, we were outside and walking back through Perth toward Featherstone. I spotted Rascal’s outline hiding behind a bush, and as we got a few steps closer, he jumped out and became fully visible again. “Gotcha!” he yelled. Ayks and I pretended to be scared. “Woah!” we said in perfect unison. He looked extra pleased with himself as only a child who has recently won an imaginary battle against orcs and trolls can. Even I couldn’t help but beam at the boy now that I knew what he was protecting. “And that is why you hand-picked me to lead the Satyrs Three,” Rascal said, puffing out his chest. “Only I could have gotten the drop on the Raven Court’s royal arcanist.” “Truly,” Ayks playing the humble card perfectly. “Listen, Rascal. I believe the Crone is going to rest for a bit. So stay close to her door, okay?” The satyr saluted my teacher, and we left. On the way back to Perth, the arcanist spoke without looking up at me. “What was your first lesson in magic today?” she asked. I thought hard over our visit with the Crone and came up empty. I didn’t see an ounce of magic used during our time there. Scratching my head, I found myself scared to answer. Ayks’ tone lacked her usual softness. This was the voice of a teacher. We rounded a bakery and continued toward Featherstone. “If you don’t know something, I’d prefer you just say so rather than staying silent out of fear to how I might respond, okay? I’ll never be mad at you for not knowing something. We’re all guilty of that at least two or three times a day, okay?” I nodded. “Sorry, teacher. I didn’t see any magic used during our visit with the Crone.” My teacher’s voice softened a tiny bit. “I didn’t say I’d teach you how to use glamour today, did I?” she asked. I shook my head. “No. You said. . . you’d teach me what to use glamour for before teaching me how to wield it.” “Good memory, my apprentice. And what did you learn from Jada’s story today about how I use my power as this court’s royal arcanist?” I thought back to the disastrous bargains we’d struck and what we had in common. . . Ayks coming to our rescue. A seagull flew over us and called out before landing to pick up an abandoned bread crust. “You use your power and glamour to help people?” I took a guess at what she wanted to hear. And to my surprise, my teacher shouted, “That’s exactly it! And as I teach you to wield glamour, the magic that holds the very fabric of Faerie together, I want you to understand it’s at its most powerful when used to help others.” I took a deep breath and processed her words. It left me wishing Sylva had used her magic to simply get me out of the wedding without stealing my body. Surely that was within her capabilities, right? “Teacher, if glamour is at its most powerful when used to help others, why do so many fae instead use it to prey on humans and each other?” The satyr’s hooves were all I heard for a moment as she pondered my question. And she took her sweet time answering. We walked past a couple of elven maidens dressed in fine clothes who were discussing an opera. One had clearly enjoyed the performance more than the other. “The sad truth is most fae are driven by their instincts and desires. However, I don’t think humans are much different in that regard. Most fae spend their eternities running full speed toward the things they think will make them happy in the moment. And most fae cross the Silver Bridge within a century or two because they don’t often think about the consequences of their desires.” I held onto Ayks’ hair as the wind picked up. Some nearby trash whipped around the corner and came within inches of knocking me off my teacher’s shoulder. When I could focus on her words again, my heart rate returning somewhat to normal, I heard Ayks say, “Most fae who live to see 300 tend to mellow out. They learn the deeper truths of our world and may even come to gain a deeper appreciation of life, be it ageless or mortal.” “And when did you gain a deeper appreciation of life?” I asked, watching her face for any signs of displeasure at my curiosity. My teacher didn’t reprimand me for my question. She just sighed. “Unlike most fae, I learned at the age of 20. I watched how the cruelty of fae instinct and a thirst for blood could bring even the most powerful court to ruin. I watched the Frost Court’s invasion and subsequent toppling, including the murder of my queen and my mothers.” The air around us seemed to chill just a bit as she spoke. “If Queen Varella hadn’t picked me out of the ruins that day and granted me sanctuary and tutelage here, I would have done something impetuous and gotten myself killed. When I came here and learned from the greatest arcane minds Varella had at her disposal, I vowed then and there to learn all I could and work hard to ensure this queendom didn’t meet the same fate as my homeland. So far. . . so good. One pet werewolf later, the Raven Queen seems to be taking a different path from the Frost Queen.” I scoffed. “She seemed plenty bloodthirsty when I blew into Featherbrooke carried on the back of said werewolf,” I said before I could think. See? Clod of bitterness in my chest. “I hope in time you’ll forgive her for that. She’s had a rough go of it in these last couple weeks. Hell, all of Faerie has. Nearly every king and queen was annihilated during a rare meeting. Our queen was the only one who made it out alive, and it’s solely because of her pet werewolf.” My eyes widened as I pictured Sierra soaked in blood and doing anything she could to protect her mistress. It was. . . strange to imagine such a thing. She seemed so gentle when we bunked together last night. Yet she’d been powerful enough to save Varella amid the deaths of other kings and queens? I wonder if she’d tell me about that, I thought. Before I could ask another question, a young boy slammed into my teacher running around a corner. He was clothed all in green, shorts and shirt and cap alike. Red hair that matched the feather in his cap was covered in grime and sweat. His brown eyes were wide with fear and exhaustion. “What the fuck?” I gasped as we heard shouting from not far off. “He went this way!” One man yelled. “Run him down. Hurry up!” Another screamed. The right side of the boy’s face was covered in dried blood, and he appeared out of breath. He looks like he’s been running the world’s worst marathon, I thought. Where did this guy come from? Without asking any questions, Lady Ayks reached into her pocket, pulled out a card identical to the one she gave Rascal, and plastered it on the boy’s forehead, shushing him. I watched as he vanished from sight just as the young satyr did earlier. He looked at his arms and legs in shock but said nothing as my teacher ushered him behind her. All that remained of the boy in my sight was his outline. Two men rushed around the corner not moments later, and I had to blink twice just to make sure my eyes weren’t playing tricks on me. Those are. . . pirates? I thought, bewildered. Honest to god pirates stood before us, eyeing my teacher and me while also glancing wildly in every direction. “You there! Satyr. Did you see a boy run through here? Clothed all in green?” the taller of the pirates asked. His black shirt was torn in a couple of places, and the sleeves appeared to be hanging on by a thread. “Speak up!” the shorter man demanded, his brown pants covered in dust and maybe even a little blood. A couple of swords hung at their sides, and I didn’t want to see if they knew how to use them. The boy behind Ayks flinched. “Hey! It’s a piskie. We should ask her if she’s seen —” the shorter pirate started before being elbowed in the ribs by his companion. I climbed deeper into my teacher’s hair to stay out of sight. To her acting credit, Lady Ayks scrambled and threw on a bewildered face, suddenly screaming and cursing up a storm. “That boy was with you?! Fucking bastard plowed right into me and stole my coin purse!” The pirates exchanged glances. “If either of you catch him, I demand my money be returned at once! Goddamn rats infesting this city more each day,” my teacher said, snarling. “Which way did he go?” the taller pirate asked. My teacher was so mad that she practically hopped, and she stamped her hooves, pointing down a nearby alley. “The little shit ran down the alley before I could get a good look at him. I remember lots of green, though. Now hurry up and get his ass!” The shorter pirate flashed a wicked grin and said, “Oh, don’t worry. We’ll catch him and get your money back. C’mon, Mullins! Let’s go find this nice satyr’s coin purse.” As they ran off, I exhaled and turned to my teacher. “What was all that about?” She shook her head. “I don’t know. Lily mentioned something about a pirate ship in Perth’s harbor, but I hadn’t had much time to think about it.” We both turned to ask the boy in green who was chasing him, only to find he’d slipped off when we were busy with the pirates. “Well shit,” I muttered, scratching my head. “Indeed,” Lady Ayks muttered before we started back toward Featherstone again. “Any idea who that was?” I asked. The royal arcanist said not a word. |
2024.02.29 22:21 hungry_at_2am A new kid joined my class last month
I didn’t know this was possible with today’s technology, which is why I’m posting. If this guy can do what I’m about to describe, then anyone with some money and brains can and we all need to be on the lookout.
A new kid joined my class in January. Physically and mentally mediocre, he would have been totally beneath my notice if he hadn’t insisted from day one on being my friend, and mine alone. He talked exclusively to me, in every class, even getting us sent to the principal a few times. When he pushed my girlfriend off her seat to sit by me at lunch, I had to draw the line. I stood up and shoved him so hard that he flopped flat on his back and whacked his head with a hideous crack.
“You turd! What’s your problem?” I yelled. Popping up his head, he struck me with a lunatic grin, every tooth bared and white all around his irises. “I grew in a lab!” he shrieked. Then he laughed, but not with the howls you’d expect from his expression. I couldn’t place it, but I knew this laugh as though it were the laugh of a long lost friend. My girlfriend screamed, and finally a teacher stepped in to break up the scene.
I got suspended for that, and when I came back I was still seeing red. For three hours of morning classes I seethed, feeling his eyes bore into me from where he now sat in the far corner of the class, thankfully too far to whisper to me. I didn’t need to look for him at lunch; he muscled his way past my friends and girlfriend to sit by me, grinning like the damn Joker. I whirled on him and stared him down, ready to tell him to scram or else, but choked on my words. His eyes, which had been sky blue, were now the same shade of brown as mine.
“What the hell…” I said. The unsettling familiarity of his face had me transfixed. At once, I was aware of his hands on me, ripping the hair off my head, and then I swung my fist with all my strength. He sprawled across the hardwood worse than before and coughed up a few of my hairs, all the while emitting gibbering howls- I heard something in there about “dad’s lab” and “my new parents”- until the school nurse rushed out to bandage the gushing wound over his eye.
I got a much longer suspension after that while my parents quibbled with the school over my fate. I wasn’t too worried there because I had smart, caring parents in an affluent district that didn’t want to see itself as a source of disaffection in the youth, but I was ready to kill that fucking kid. I couldn’t stop seeing my own eyes staring over his rictus grin.
A month after my second suspension began, my parents got everything smoothed over and I was looking at going back. By now, my anger had given way to such a deep well of dread that I couldn’t eat a morsel the last day of my suspension. To ease the anxiety, I caught a bus to the mall after my weekly gymnastics class to buy a new shirt to wear on my first day back.
While I was rifling through the clearance rack, a kid I sorta knew from class moseyed over to chat. “Hey, man, we haven’t talked in a while. How’ve you been since that big fight? You hear what happened to that kid?”
“Big fight! I’ve had bigger fights with my baby sister” I scoffed. “I’m good. I’m actually going back to class on Monday, so I’ll be seeing you all again soon.” He furrowed his brow. “What do you mean?” he asked.
“I just mean my suspension is over” I said.
“Well, yeah,” he replied. “Obviously, since you’ve been back all week.”
I stared him in the face. Was he messing with me? “Fuck you, dog, that’s not funny” I snapped. He stepped back with his hands up. “Hey, man, I’m sorry. I thought I’d been seeing you in class, that’s all. Maybe I’m remembering wrong.”
The sunlight wavered through heavy, stormy air on the day of my return to class, and the school bus arrived late. Jeff, the normally jovial driver, ignored me as I boarded. When I turned to walk down the aisle, I saw the whole bus was empty. That wasn’t right. I turned to leave but the door slammed and the bus lurched forward, knocking me into the front row seat. “Hey, stop! I, uh, forgot something. My mom can just drive me” I shouted. “Jeff! Why aren’t you answering?”
Horror squeezed my chest as the bus turned away from my school and onto the state highway into the countryside. My cellphone wasn’t getting bars for some reason, so I stood up, realizing I’d have to take drastic measures. “I’m sorry to do this, Jeff” I said as I gripped my metal water bottle, poised to strike. Before I could, though, powerful hands grasped my shoulders from behind and forced me back to the seat, where I writhed around to see this new assailant.
It was me, or rather, Not-me. The new kid had copied my eyes and now he’d copied the rest of me, too. “What’s this all about?” I demanded hoarsely. The bus ground to a halt on a lonely county road and Jeff rose to face me. His face looked blurred. I don’t think it really was Jeff.
“You’re the bastard spawn of that filth who stole my beloved” he muttered. “Your mongrel father stole that woman from me, and now I’ll steal his precious son and replace him with my own flesh and blood!”
Not-Jeff pulled a syringe from his pocket. “Hold him there, son!” he screamed exultantly, his life’s work evidently nearing completion. Not-me was going for a full nelson. Mustering all the strength of a gymnast, I rocked forward onto my feet, barrelling Not-me over my head and squarely into his father’s chest, the three of us landing in a heap. Following through onto my feet, I lunged upward and grasped the oversized rearview mirror, yanked it off the mount, turned, and shattered it over Not-my head.
“Get the fuck off me, you worthless fetus!” roared not-Jeff, who rolled his creation right onto a shard of broken glass while he fumbled for the murderous syringe. Not-my screams turned to gurgles when I slashed his throat with the other side of the mirror. Not-Jeff’s skin turned ashen before I could even get to him. He must have landed on the syringe.
I got out of the bus through the emergency window and the bars reappeared on my cellphone. I called my parents and then sat, waiting next to the school bus for the people who love me most in the world.
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A new kid joined my class in January. Physically and mentally mediocre, he would have been totally beneath my notice if he hadn’t insisted from day one on being my friend, and mine alone. He talked exclusively to me, in every class, even getting us sent to the principal a few times. When he pushed my girlfriend off her seat to sit by me at lunch, I had to draw the line. I stood up and shoved him so hard that he flopped flat on his back and whacked his head with a hideous crack.
“You turd! What’s your problem?” I yelled. Popping up his head, he struck me with a lunatic grin, every tooth bared and white all around his irises. “I grew in a lab!” he shrieked. Then he laughed, but not with the howls you’d expect from his expression. I couldn’t place it, but I knew this laugh as though it were the laugh of a long lost friend. My girlfriend screamed, and finally a teacher stepped in to break up the scene.
I got suspended for that, and when I came back I was still seeing red. For three hours of morning classes I seethed, feeling his eyes bore into me from where he now sat in the far corner of the class, thankfully too far to whisper to me. I didn’t need to look for him at lunch; he muscled his way past my friends and girlfriend to sit by me, grinning like the damn Joker. I whirled on him and stared him down, ready to tell him to scram or else, but choked on my words. His eyes, which had been sky blue, were now the same shade of brown as mine.
“What the hell…” I said. The unsettling familiarity of his face had me transfixed. At once, I was aware of his hands on me, ripping the hair off my head, and then I swung my fist with all my strength. He sprawled across the hardwood worse than before and coughed up a few of my hairs, all the while emitting gibbering howls- I heard something in there about “dad’s lab” and “my new parents”- until the school nurse rushed out to bandage the gushing wound over his eye.
I got a much longer suspension after that while my parents quibbled with the school over my fate. I wasn’t too worried there because I had smart, caring parents in an affluent district that didn’t want to see itself as a source of disaffection in the youth, but I was ready to kill that fucking kid. I couldn’t stop seeing my own eyes staring over his rictus grin.
A month after my second suspension began, my parents got everything smoothed over and I was looking at going back. By now, my anger had given way to such a deep well of dread that I couldn’t eat a morsel the last day of my suspension. To ease the anxiety, I caught a bus to the mall after my weekly gymnastics class to buy a new shirt to wear on my first day back.
While I was rifling through the clearance rack, a kid I sorta knew from class moseyed over to chat. “Hey, man, we haven’t talked in a while. How’ve you been since that big fight? You hear what happened to that kid?”
“Big fight! I’ve had bigger fights with my baby sister” I scoffed. “I’m good. I’m actually going back to class on Monday, so I’ll be seeing you all again soon.” He furrowed his brow. “What do you mean?” he asked.
“I just mean my suspension is over” I said.
“Well, yeah,” he replied. “Obviously, since you’ve been back all week.”
I stared him in the face. Was he messing with me? “Fuck you, dog, that’s not funny” I snapped. He stepped back with his hands up. “Hey, man, I’m sorry. I thought I’d been seeing you in class, that’s all. Maybe I’m remembering wrong.”
The sunlight wavered through heavy, stormy air on the day of my return to class, and the school bus arrived late. Jeff, the normally jovial driver, ignored me as I boarded. When I turned to walk down the aisle, I saw the whole bus was empty. That wasn’t right. I turned to leave but the door slammed and the bus lurched forward, knocking me into the front row seat. “Hey, stop! I, uh, forgot something. My mom can just drive me” I shouted. “Jeff! Why aren’t you answering?”
Horror squeezed my chest as the bus turned away from my school and onto the state highway into the countryside. My cellphone wasn’t getting bars for some reason, so I stood up, realizing I’d have to take drastic measures. “I’m sorry to do this, Jeff” I said as I gripped my metal water bottle, poised to strike. Before I could, though, powerful hands grasped my shoulders from behind and forced me back to the seat, where I writhed around to see this new assailant.
It was me, or rather, Not-me. The new kid had copied my eyes and now he’d copied the rest of me, too. “What’s this all about?” I demanded hoarsely. The bus ground to a halt on a lonely county road and Jeff rose to face me. His face looked blurred. I don’t think it really was Jeff.
“You’re the bastard spawn of that filth who stole my beloved” he muttered. “Your mongrel father stole that woman from me, and now I’ll steal his precious son and replace him with my own flesh and blood!”
Not-Jeff pulled a syringe from his pocket. “Hold him there, son!” he screamed exultantly, his life’s work evidently nearing completion. Not-me was going for a full nelson. Mustering all the strength of a gymnast, I rocked forward onto my feet, barrelling Not-me over my head and squarely into his father’s chest, the three of us landing in a heap. Following through onto my feet, I lunged upward and grasped the oversized rearview mirror, yanked it off the mount, turned, and shattered it over Not-my head.
“Get the fuck off me, you worthless fetus!” roared not-Jeff, who rolled his creation right onto a shard of broken glass while he fumbled for the murderous syringe. Not-my screams turned to gurgles when I slashed his throat with the other side of the mirror. Not-Jeff’s skin turned ashen before I could even get to him. He must have landed on the syringe.
I got out of the bus through the emergency window and the bars reappeared on my cellphone. I called my parents and then sat, waiting next to the school bus for the people who love me most in the world.
2024.02.26 20:51 ParticularlyAvocado Fullmetal Alchemist Reviewed: Episode 1 - 35
1. Those Who Challenge the Sun - 4/5 (I like the atmospheric opening of this. Starting with the mysterious, horrifying transmutation, only to then show Ed and Al wandering the desert, seemingly happy. Bonus points for the cute and funny moment when they tease each other and Ed chases Al around. Wholesome.
One thing this show got down really well is the reveal of Al being an empty suit of armor. I already knew this, but I still think it's a very well done reveal, especially if you were a first time viewer. It's first comically shown in the beginning when he opens up his armor and dumps sand all over Ed. But I think there's curtains or something covering the inside (why?). When Cornello's men try to shoot him in the back of the head and his body fights back, THAT'S the actual reveal. It's very dramatic and Rose's reaction to it really enhances the story. She pretty much serves the role of an Audience Surrogate. Seeing all these magic tricks in the show, that Ed and Al can spoonfed her (thus, the audience) lore about)
2. Body of the Sanctioned - 4/5 (Just a continuation of the last episode. Ed tricks Cornello into blabbing about his plans and Al boradcasts it to the entire city. Around that, there's just a lot of fighting. And some more of Rose's story, thinking her boyfriend is back from the dead. Really just had two throwaway thoughts here
4. A Forger's Love - 3/5 (This episode is okay, but definitey less engaging than the previous. It's just a detour on their way to Central. But the villain was really twisted. He kidnaps random women and put their souls into mannequins of his dead wife?! Yikes. That just seems like a really horrifying fate. When I first found that out, I questioned why one of them would kill Clause's sister though... Until I realized, her sister was kidnapped my Majhal and BECAME a mannequin.
Ending on Clause finally embracing dressing feminine was cute. But I don't understand the meaning. There's nothing wrong with the way she dressed before)
5. The Man with the Mechanical Arm - 3/5 (I'm just here waiting for Ed and Al to get to Central but they keep going on detours and finding interruptions on their way. Now the train they're on his being hijacked. It's not a very intricate story. It feels mostly like an excuse to have a bunch of cool fighting sequences on a moving vehicle, and show Ed being clever. He's supposed to be 12 in this episode, but he takes on a group of armed terrorists. I'm willing to believe his feats when he's a little older, but 12? And Mustang intentionally put him on that train to test him? A train he knew there would be terrorists on? What the...
Regardless, that's not to say it was bad. I still liked the way Ed and Al took control of the situation. There's just little story progression to comment on. And I also love the shot of Al standing above the thugs, about to kick their ass. Unusual for such a gentle and wholesome character)
6. The Alchemy Exam - 3/5 (This is not a bad episode, but there's not a lot of story to it. Just a ton of exposition about the exam, and time killing until Ed finally takes it. Granted, time that's spend developing them finding a "home" with Shou and Nina. And Hughes' daughter is finally born. These are things that indeed happened... That I generally don't have many thoughts about. Only that Nina giving Ed a cute drawing she made before his exam was adorable. On the topic of the exam, though, why is it done like a contest where you have to perform some epic feat to prove your worth, and only one person can win? This is the military... It would make more sense if there was already a training program, and one specific physical exam they'd have to complete. Like an obstacle course or something.
The ending is really sweet, though. Beautiful golden hour combined with Ed's optimism for the future. I always get a little emotional when Ed and Al simply bond over their shared goal, be it optimistic or sad about it)
7. Night of the Chimera's Cry - 4/5 (Ed gets curious about Tucker's talking chimera from 2 years ago, figures out that he combined his wife with an animal, and has now done the same to Nina and Alexander. Horrible fate. Very sad indeed. I already knew this, so it wasn't as shocking. They do hint a little too much that Tucker is gonna be up to something no good. And he's wayyyyy too talkative in the scene when Ed beats him up. And also, I thought Ed was 12 in the previous episodes. And it was his birthday in the last one. Wouldn't that make him 13? Because they say he's 12 in this. I guess he was 11 during the train episode and such?
Scar finally makes an appearence in the show at least. That's cool. I'm not sure why he ran away just because Ed ripped off his jacket sleeve, though. He doesn't even understand his tattoo, so why does he think there's something to hide? He's there to figure out more about what his tattoos mean. Also, that must've been a really poorly made jacket if it just ripped apart that easily from Ed simply grabbing it)
8. The Philosopher's Stone - 5/5 (It's pretty cruel to make Ed and Al continue Tucker's research after what they just had to endure from him. Instead they go chase after a lady killer on the loose. I gotta admit, they had me for a while. I thought Scar was the killer at first, and kept asking myself whatever reason he would have to possibly target women.
It was pretty obvious that it was someone else when the very noticable cross dresser walked into the kitchen, though. That's obviously a guy. How did no one realize that? And I cannot take Barry seriously at all because he looks like a scrawny weirdo. Despite that, the butcher shop scene still really is terrifying. Winry being there due to coming for a surprise visit but getting kidnapped by Barry amps up the intensity so much. Ed is usually a badass who'll fight anyone without fear, and usually in an epic alchemic battle sequence. But here, he's terrified for his damn life. Only having one arm to fend off a crazed killer chasing him with a giant knife, while trying to save Winry at the same time. It was different, but awesome)
9. The Dog of the Military's Silver Watch - 4/5 (And THAT'S the end of the "flashback" episodes. 2 episodes set in the present and then 7 in a row that takes place before them? SHEESH that was long. So, here we have... A pretty good story about Ed helping a poor mining town that's being conned by Yoki, the local general keeping watch of the town, raising their taxes ridiculously high. Nothing bad about it at all... But I also don't have many specific positives to comment on either. It was just good. I guess we're just seeing some of the various good deeds Edward does for people as the Fullmetal Alchemist, and that's what this is for. I love how he cleverly conned Yoki back)
10. The Phantom Thief - 3/5 (Another one of these episodes where there's nothing BAD about it, but the plot simply isn't interesting enough to grip me, nor is there anything particularly wrong with it, thus, leaveing me with few thoughts to actually reflect upon, so... Here are some stupid side notes:
I guess I shouldn't question it since it will likely be revealed in time, but, how the hell is it possible to make FAKE philosopher stones that amplify alchemy? At the end of the day, there's gotta be some sort of energy condensed into the stone. Even if it isn't human souls. Some random red liquid isn't gonna cut it. I demand an explanation!
It feels like everywhere the Elrics go, they meet some twisted villain who wants to sacrifice other people for their own selfish gains. This time, it's Mugear who wants to infect pregnant women with the disease caused by the red water, so he can... Kidnap their babies and extract all their blood, killing them, to make red stones. Like, YIKES, man. Wouldn't that make them more effective philosopher stones anyway, what with them also containing blood then?
One really cool thing he has at least is his alchemy machine. A device that allows non-alchemists to transmute with the push of a button? That's wild. Anyway some more side notes, uhhh... Edward acting super happy about executing the fake Elrics was pretty funny. All 4 teaming up to take down Mugear was cool. And I thought the ending was really sweet. A nice golden sunset, followed by that very cheery ED)
13. Fullmetal VS Flame - 4/5 (Well, THIS episode is a lot more expressive than usual. Immediately from the cold opening, when Edward rants about Mustang, and Alphonse grabs the kitten, the way they move is very expressive. Ed's crazy body language when he's ranting is funny, and Alphonse gets up so rickety. And these moments keep happening throughout the whole episode. Roy even has a lot of expressive moments too. Specifically the scene where he talks about how much he loves dogs. He's generally just more expressive verbally, not only physically. He was really boring until this point. Now he finally loosens up.
I like how Ed desperately wants to fight him, and uses the annual alchemist assesment as an excuse. The cut to Fuhrer Bradley saying he'll allow it was funny. But in the end, that wasn't much of a fight. When it starts, Ed just runs away, comes back, makes a canon, canon is destroyed by Roy and then he has Ed pinned down. That was it?? It could've been more grand.
The Alphonse kitten bits were so adorable and I loved it. Meawhile, all the dog stuff with Mustang's subordinates had me snoring. YAWN)
14. Destruction's Right Hand - 3/5 (The art of badass entrances has been passed down the Armstrong line for generations! I love how stoically Armstrong walks past Ed, Al and Marcoh to lay a beatdown on Scar. Too bad that isn't until the end. The rest of this episode is a lot of reveals and story progression. Not much to comment on. It's just brutal how it begins with a the military massacring people in Liore)
15. The Ishbal Massacre - 4/5 (Stop TALKING so much when you're supposed to fight! I get it's necessary for exposition but I find it so ridiculous that while Scar just stands there silently, Armstrong just babbles on and on and makes a bunch of assumptions about his motives. Why doesn't Scar just shut him up and start attacking?
Anyway, this episode is about half flashbacks to the Ishbal war and- Wait, ROY KILLED WINRY'S PARENTS?! Now THAT'S just... Brutal. Ed is NOT gonna be happy when he finds that out)
16. That Which Is Lost - 4/5 (Not that I don't enjoy these episodes, but every time there's some sort of story progression up ahead, Ed and Al always find some bump in the road that causes a whole episode of events in between. And while this was still good, there isn't, like, MUCH of a story to it. Alphonse is taken off the train, so Ed follows him, gets his leg stolen and meets some guy and they talk. Just about philosophical stuff. And then he dips. And that's just the actual plot. The start of the episode is just full of scenes before they're about to travel. But this is not criticism, since I still like the slow pacing and time we get to spend with the characters. Especially Armstrong. So, screw you, Ed. His stories seem awesome. I'd listen to them. He's such a wholesome guy. Ed doesn't know what he's missing.
Alphonse's part in the episode had potential to be the best, but it kinda goes nowhere. Some kid steals the "armor" he finds and is about to fight some guys with it, but doesn't because Al talks him out of it. Or, rather, scares him off. But it would've been way more interesting to actually see a fight unfold, and Alphonse having to step in and take control of the situation. That could be when the thief realized the armor was alive. And, about that: How is he convinced this is some robotic, talking armor? Maybe if this was the 2010's that could be believable. But the 1910's? No way)
17. House of the Waiting Family - 4/5 (Just a pure, wholesome no-stakes episode about the brothers finally visiting "home" after all the years away in the big city. That's all there is to say about it. Winry being emotional about it and wanting them back is sweet. Pinako asking Armstrong about them is sweet. It's all sweet. I especially liked Ed and Al sparring, and Armstrong desperately wanting to join in. And when he eventually does, they both beat him. Haha)
18. Marcoh's Notes - 3/5 (Sheska is a cute character. I, uh, liked seeing Scar clash with the homunculi, and Hughes' conversation with Ross about encourarging the brothers)
19. The Truth Behind Truths - 3/5 (Alphonse is still extremely optimistic while Edward is sulking. As usual. It's funny that Ross, someone who they've only known for, what, a couple of days? Is the one to get him back on his feet with an inspirational speech. We barely know anything about her.
Also, I can't tell what Scar's intentions are. He is specifically chasing Edward, but I assume it's not to kill him, given the vague statements Lust gave him about how they're gonna use him. If he was still on a state alchemist killing spree, he would have just moved onto whoever he could get his hands on, right? ALSO also, Scar is on his way to the 5th labratory now because he knows that's where Edward is, but he only knows because Edward circled the labratory on the map on his table. WHY did he do that? It's not like that would be hard to remember. I guess it was just so Scar could find out!)
20. Soul of the Guardian - 4/5 (Fighting, fighting, fighting... A whole episode of nothing but Ed an Al fighting people, separately. Good, but NOT much to comment on. I only found the ending really endearing with the way Barry is convincing Alphonse that his memories are fake; Fabricated by Edward to use him. While Edward is simultaneously monologuing about how he considers his brother as real as ever. I thought the contrast was interesting, and the emotional music amped up when Alphonse is upset about it makes it better)
21. The Red Glow - 4/5 (Well this episode is just full of twists and hints. Greed was imprisoned in the 5th lab all along and escapes. Tucker returns, and it's pretty blatantly revealed that Lust is a recreation of whoever Scar's brother tried to bring back. Tucker's return is the most baffling and it's insanely creepy. Like, he's transmuted himself into a chimera (a bear?) but why does he look like... THAT? Why is his head upside down? You can see his upper front body is... On the hunchback... How does he orient himself? And why is he whispering?? And he's arguably just gotten more mentally twisted. He's just trying to make a Nina homunculus now. One that's "better" than the real one? And one of the clones in the vat still hairy like a dog but with a dead-eyed Nina face was creepy. Creepiness all around
Also, Edward be like "I won't kill anyone never ever ever" but then slice and dice a bunch of animals. Okay, they're not humans, but that's still brutal. I mean, there was so much blood)
22. Created Human - 5/5 (This episode feels so climactic. They've been building up a mystery and keeping the homunculi away from Ed and Al for so long, it's gratifying to finally have them meet eye to eye more than just catching Lust stalking them. We're finally getting some answers in this confrontation. Albeit a pretty stupid answer:
So, the homunculi were just leaving a trail of breadcrumbs about the stone so that someone would spend years researching it and sneak into this lab and transmute a bunch of prisoners into a philosopher's stone so that the homonculi can become human? That is SO convoluted. If that's their only goal, why didn't they just get some other skilled alchemist to do it? One that's already morally bankrupt and probably would? Like uh, I don't know, Kimblee? Would it not be a smarter plan to just break him out in exchanged for him making the stone, and letting him do as he wishes with it once they've become human?
And also, when Ed started hesitating and the tanks started breaking, why didn't Lust just kill Alphonse? Didn't she have her claws ready to do it? That seemed like the opportunity to. Like, yeah, I know that would leave Ed with no reason to not attack them, but I thought the point was to do it if he refused. Instead she just let the time run out and they got away... With the help of... Scar. Lol. Side note, Ed spazzing out in the red water looked pretty funny)
23. Fullmetal Heart - 4/5 (Well, here's a nice change of pace. In this, Alphonse is the one constantly sulking. For pretty stupid reasons, though. He keeps doubting his existence every time he can't remember something... Something from when he was like, a damn toddler. Of course he wouldn't remember a lot of that. Anyway, hearing him be so passive aggressive, and then straight on aggressive by telling Ed to "shut up" is so jarringly out of character that it works so great for the drama.
Hughes just TAKING Winry to his home is extremely weird. Like, maybe if he offered to let her stay there in a natural way, it would be fine. But he just grabs her and says she's lucky because she gets to meet his daughter, with no other context... Ok then. Also, the Hiromu Arakawa cow appearing when Ed and Winry argue about milk was a neat cameo)
24. Bonding Memories - 4/5 (This episode beginning with a bomb dropping on 2 Ishbalan's and killing them caught me off guard. Followed by a whole massacre the refugee camp. The brutality in this show is sky high. And Alphonse kicks ass in this episode. Literally and figuratively. Beating up the "military" men trying to kill the refugees was badass, and simply following his story of meeting these two Ishbalan brothers was endearing. As were the brothers. The fact that Alphonse is perfectly fine talking to Scar who desperately wants to kill his brother is wild, though. And then he proceeds to ask Scar a stupidly awkward question. No offense Al, but, really? You ask the killer?
Also, why was Barry still moving and making noises like he was struggling long after his transmutation circle burnt up? That made no sense)
25. Words of Farewell - 4/5 (Ed and Al are taking a train to... Meet Scar... After they said goodbye to him in the previous episode. Why didn't they just take the chance there?!?!?!? This is why I thought it was so stupid that they let just let him go instead of arresting him.
It's at least nice to see the story actually going somewhere instead of just a bunch of random adventures while the villains lurk in the background. Finally they're doing more and more to advance. This time by killing Hughes. Sad. His excessive babble about his daughter had grown on me)
26. Her Reason - 5/5 (Winry's love for automatil is a very cute character trait. I found it both cute and funny when the Ed got mad at the armwrestling guy for calling him short and Winry just laughs, but then gets just as mad as Ed when the guy insults the automail she made.
I don't really understand the conflict at the core of this episode, though. Ed used alchemy to win the armwrestling match, but that doesn't mean he doesn't like Winry's automail. He constantly praises it and says it's by the best mechanic. So what exactly is she trying to prove by teaming up with Paninya? To have Ed... Chase her? How does that prove a point? Also, how does that prove PANINYA'S point of trying to show how great HER mechanic's work is? Running around with a pocket watch? Wow, that sure is impressive...
Still, even if I found Winry's anger misplaced, she's such an endearing character and the fact that she is hurt by it makes me sad. I even got a bit teary eyed at the end when she started crying about it. Too bad that moment is quickly interrupted by Alphonse barging in)
27. Teacher - 3/5 (I guess this is similar to the Resembol episode, in which there are no big stakes and just the brothers reuniting with someone. This time their teacher. So, nothing really happens. Just some backstory of how they met. There's some part where a cat dies after giving birth to represent the continuation of life... Meh. The ending was whack, though. Izumi beats the crap out of the boys, and then emotionally hugs them)
28. All is One, One is All - 3/5 (Ed and Al surviving on an island for a month as seen both in the past and the present, told simultaneously. This one is okay, but nothing really happens... It's obvious the masked man is the guy who was with Izumi and Sig at dinner. They're just there again to reflect on their choices, or something)
29. The Untainted Child - 4/5 (A mysterious boy was all alone on the island? Now that's interesting. We finally see what happened to Edward during the human transmutation? Better. The mysterioys boy is a homonculus? OOOH... AND HE HAS EDWARD'S ARM AND LEG?! Now THESE are some interesting series of events, FINALLY. Side note, the boy's constant screaming when he transmuted himself with the bed was ANNOYING! I was so glad when Izumi shut him up. My ears were bleeding.
And the episode teases more mystery as well. Obviously it's suspenseful AND suspicious that the new, obviously evil Lieutenant Colonel wants to track down Ed and Al. Who also says there's a big battle coming? And has Armstrong alongside him, who clearly doesn't want him to find them)
30. Assault on South Headquarters - 3/5 (Well, I say I want more plot things to happen, but now it feels like a lot of them are happening without much substance in between. It's weird pacing. There's a lot of episodes where basically nothing of importance happens, then there's ONE where a TON of things happen.
So here we have:
31. Sin - 4/5 (So the we're finally being told how a homunculus is made, even though this has been pretty obvious before now. Well, somewhat. Obviously we've known they're the result of human transmutation. But even with this explanation, it's a little unclear HOW. The logic of the "gate" is a little unclear, but that's probably on purpose. I did like the reveal that the Wrath's arm and leg are, in fact, Edward's (even though we knew this, it's just I thought the scene was cool).
My real question is, why are they all named after the 7 deadly sins?? And, instantly after realizing he's a homunculus, Wrath also wants to "become human". WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?? Your body is in the exact shape of a human. You look human. You can think and feel like a human. You have self awareness. Except you ALSO have cool powers. I really don't see why being a homunculus isn't just a win. Side note, loled at Greed running off when confronted by Sloth and Envy)
32. Dante of the Deep Forest - 3/5 (Alphonse heroically defending his brother is awesome! It gives you chills when Alphonse is the one stepping up and getting seriously angry. Even willing to kill, I think? He seemed pretty willing to absolutely destroy Wrath, anyway. He doesn't, BUT, someone else is killed. Yoki. That way he was shot mid-sentence startled me. Yikes. Roy gearing up to burn all those Ishbalan refugees was quite a shock too, but the scene was over after we only saw his hand ignite a small flame, so, I never found out, this episode at least, if he actually did it. Surely not?
They're trying to keep reveals at arms length here, but the fact that Sloth LOOKS like Trisha, the reveal that homunculi are made from human transmutation, and the fact that Alphonse was about to ask Edward about it but received no answers... Obviously Sloth was made by them. Get to "revealing" it already, I wanna see their reaction, dammit!
Also, all this talk about equivalent exchange as a philosophy is driving me nuts. It's not a philosophy! In terms of alchemy, it's literally science. It's equivalent exchange because you can't spawn matter out of thin air. You have too use molecules from something else to form something new! It's not deeper than that! Argh!)
33. Al, Captured - 3/5 (Well, THAT was a mysterious scene between Izumi and Dante. Why would she assume Dante had anything to do with Alphonse being kidnapped? Also, no offense to Alphonse, but he's literally the worst at strategizing to escape capture. He straight up reveals his weakspot to the woman inside his armor. That was DUMB. And then refuses to help Greed simply because he's a "bad person". I mean, I get his sentiment, but couldn't he pretend to cooperate long enough to gain their trust and make an escape, or to buy time for Edward to find him? He's risking a lot by sitting there being cocky.
Lot of time here is just spend standing in the same room and arguing with Greed. Sig stepping up and helping Izumi was nice at least. It's pretty funny how big and strong he is, yet she's the only one truly kicking ass)
34. Theory of Avarice - 3/5 (By the end of the episode I was literally thinking "Where the heck is Winry right now? She never went home to Resembol, but the boys and Izumi are spread about everywhere. Is she still at Izumi's home?" And whaddya know, this episode begins by showing me exactly that.
Gotta love Armstrong. He's been under Lieutenant Colonel Archer's command and clearly does not approve of his decisions and rejects orders every time he's not around. He literally says finding Alphonse is not a priority, then bursts in to save him. Stand-up guy.
Then the rest of this episode is mostly about Greed. Who, in my opinion, is not really that interesting. There's some scenes showing how loyal his goons are, then he fights Edward and dies. Of course dying by the hands of Edward was of big importance since it's the first time Ed has killed anyone. Although the way he was talking, both in last episode and this, I assumed he was open to the idea. So I thought when he impaled Greed, it was with the purpose to kill him. But then he gets surprised and traumatized when he dies because of it. Anyway, judging by the end, they're finally leaving Dublith. The episodes there have not been nearly as interesting as the ones before it, so, I'm happy)
35. Reunion of the Fallen - 4/5 (Well, this was an interesting episode. It's really mostly about Lust. Edward and Alphonse are hardly in it. I found that, and the dark/rainy atmosphere of the whole episode, really interesting. But still a little confused by her actions. It seemed to be she grew pretty fond of the guy she was helping cure a disease in his town, but maybe I was wrong and she truly is just a manipulative bitch who never cared? Or she really only liked him for the memories of Scar's brother he manages to bring back? Because she kills him in the end for no reason at all, and calls him a mistake.
This episode makes me question how long these homunculi have been trying to bait random alchemists to transmute a philosophers stone for them. Like, their ENTIRE lives has been nothing but baiting, but still getting no catch. Must be annoying)
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One thing this show got down really well is the reveal of Al being an empty suit of armor. I already knew this, but I still think it's a very well done reveal, especially if you were a first time viewer. It's first comically shown in the beginning when he opens up his armor and dumps sand all over Ed. But I think there's curtains or something covering the inside (why?). When Cornello's men try to shoot him in the back of the head and his body fights back, THAT'S the actual reveal. It's very dramatic and Rose's reaction to it really enhances the story. She pretty much serves the role of an Audience Surrogate. Seeing all these magic tricks in the show, that Ed and Al can spoonfed her (thus, the audience) lore about)
2. Body of the Sanctioned - 4/5 (Just a continuation of the last episode. Ed tricks Cornello into blabbing about his plans and Al boradcasts it to the entire city. Around that, there's just a lot of fighting. And some more of Rose's story, thinking her boyfriend is back from the dead. Really just had two throwaway thoughts here
- Rose leaving food for Ed while his arms were chained up... And him trying to move it with his feet: That was funny.
- How and WHY did Ed make a door to escape Cornello? Firstly, that door was fully metal. And very detailed for no reason at all. Second... Breaking down the wall should have been easier, no?)
4. A Forger's Love - 3/5 (This episode is okay, but definitey less engaging than the previous. It's just a detour on their way to Central. But the villain was really twisted. He kidnaps random women and put their souls into mannequins of his dead wife?! Yikes. That just seems like a really horrifying fate. When I first found that out, I questioned why one of them would kill Clause's sister though... Until I realized, her sister was kidnapped my Majhal and BECAME a mannequin.
Ending on Clause finally embracing dressing feminine was cute. But I don't understand the meaning. There's nothing wrong with the way she dressed before)
5. The Man with the Mechanical Arm - 3/5 (I'm just here waiting for Ed and Al to get to Central but they keep going on detours and finding interruptions on their way. Now the train they're on his being hijacked. It's not a very intricate story. It feels mostly like an excuse to have a bunch of cool fighting sequences on a moving vehicle, and show Ed being clever. He's supposed to be 12 in this episode, but he takes on a group of armed terrorists. I'm willing to believe his feats when he's a little older, but 12? And Mustang intentionally put him on that train to test him? A train he knew there would be terrorists on? What the...
Regardless, that's not to say it was bad. I still liked the way Ed and Al took control of the situation. There's just little story progression to comment on. And I also love the shot of Al standing above the thugs, about to kick their ass. Unusual for such a gentle and wholesome character)
6. The Alchemy Exam - 3/5 (This is not a bad episode, but there's not a lot of story to it. Just a ton of exposition about the exam, and time killing until Ed finally takes it. Granted, time that's spend developing them finding a "home" with Shou and Nina. And Hughes' daughter is finally born. These are things that indeed happened... That I generally don't have many thoughts about. Only that Nina giving Ed a cute drawing she made before his exam was adorable. On the topic of the exam, though, why is it done like a contest where you have to perform some epic feat to prove your worth, and only one person can win? This is the military... It would make more sense if there was already a training program, and one specific physical exam they'd have to complete. Like an obstacle course or something.
The ending is really sweet, though. Beautiful golden hour combined with Ed's optimism for the future. I always get a little emotional when Ed and Al simply bond over their shared goal, be it optimistic or sad about it)
7. Night of the Chimera's Cry - 4/5 (Ed gets curious about Tucker's talking chimera from 2 years ago, figures out that he combined his wife with an animal, and has now done the same to Nina and Alexander. Horrible fate. Very sad indeed. I already knew this, so it wasn't as shocking. They do hint a little too much that Tucker is gonna be up to something no good. And he's wayyyyy too talkative in the scene when Ed beats him up. And also, I thought Ed was 12 in the previous episodes. And it was his birthday in the last one. Wouldn't that make him 13? Because they say he's 12 in this. I guess he was 11 during the train episode and such?
Scar finally makes an appearence in the show at least. That's cool. I'm not sure why he ran away just because Ed ripped off his jacket sleeve, though. He doesn't even understand his tattoo, so why does he think there's something to hide? He's there to figure out more about what his tattoos mean. Also, that must've been a really poorly made jacket if it just ripped apart that easily from Ed simply grabbing it)
8. The Philosopher's Stone - 5/5 (It's pretty cruel to make Ed and Al continue Tucker's research after what they just had to endure from him. Instead they go chase after a lady killer on the loose. I gotta admit, they had me for a while. I thought Scar was the killer at first, and kept asking myself whatever reason he would have to possibly target women.
It was pretty obvious that it was someone else when the very noticable cross dresser walked into the kitchen, though. That's obviously a guy. How did no one realize that? And I cannot take Barry seriously at all because he looks like a scrawny weirdo. Despite that, the butcher shop scene still really is terrifying. Winry being there due to coming for a surprise visit but getting kidnapped by Barry amps up the intensity so much. Ed is usually a badass who'll fight anyone without fear, and usually in an epic alchemic battle sequence. But here, he's terrified for his damn life. Only having one arm to fend off a crazed killer chasing him with a giant knife, while trying to save Winry at the same time. It was different, but awesome)
9. The Dog of the Military's Silver Watch - 4/5 (And THAT'S the end of the "flashback" episodes. 2 episodes set in the present and then 7 in a row that takes place before them? SHEESH that was long. So, here we have... A pretty good story about Ed helping a poor mining town that's being conned by Yoki, the local general keeping watch of the town, raising their taxes ridiculously high. Nothing bad about it at all... But I also don't have many specific positives to comment on either. It was just good. I guess we're just seeing some of the various good deeds Edward does for people as the Fullmetal Alchemist, and that's what this is for. I love how he cleverly conned Yoki back)
10. The Phantom Thief - 3/5 (Another one of these episodes where there's nothing BAD about it, but the plot simply isn't interesting enough to grip me, nor is there anything particularly wrong with it, thus, leaveing me with few thoughts to actually reflect upon, so... Here are some stupid side notes:
- The doctor was real ugly
- It was obvious the nurse was Psiren from the start
- I'm not sure what was up with the shot of all the bowls on the long table. Were they for all the men standing there, or was it all for Ed?
- Psiren trolling them repeatedly was funny
- Her escape after being caught in a cage was so jarring. I heard the clap and the transmutation noises, so I know that Ed broke her out. But... We didn't see it. She just smiles while the cage is bursting, and then she's immediately outside running)
I guess I shouldn't question it since it will likely be revealed in time, but, how the hell is it possible to make FAKE philosopher stones that amplify alchemy? At the end of the day, there's gotta be some sort of energy condensed into the stone. Even if it isn't human souls. Some random red liquid isn't gonna cut it. I demand an explanation!
It feels like everywhere the Elrics go, they meet some twisted villain who wants to sacrifice other people for their own selfish gains. This time, it's Mugear who wants to infect pregnant women with the disease caused by the red water, so he can... Kidnap their babies and extract all their blood, killing them, to make red stones. Like, YIKES, man. Wouldn't that make them more effective philosopher stones anyway, what with them also containing blood then?
One really cool thing he has at least is his alchemy machine. A device that allows non-alchemists to transmute with the push of a button? That's wild. Anyway some more side notes, uhhh... Edward acting super happy about executing the fake Elrics was pretty funny. All 4 teaming up to take down Mugear was cool. And I thought the ending was really sweet. A nice golden sunset, followed by that very cheery ED)
13. Fullmetal VS Flame - 4/5 (Well, THIS episode is a lot more expressive than usual. Immediately from the cold opening, when Edward rants about Mustang, and Alphonse grabs the kitten, the way they move is very expressive. Ed's crazy body language when he's ranting is funny, and Alphonse gets up so rickety. And these moments keep happening throughout the whole episode. Roy even has a lot of expressive moments too. Specifically the scene where he talks about how much he loves dogs. He's generally just more expressive verbally, not only physically. He was really boring until this point. Now he finally loosens up.
I like how Ed desperately wants to fight him, and uses the annual alchemist assesment as an excuse. The cut to Fuhrer Bradley saying he'll allow it was funny. But in the end, that wasn't much of a fight. When it starts, Ed just runs away, comes back, makes a canon, canon is destroyed by Roy and then he has Ed pinned down. That was it?? It could've been more grand.
The Alphonse kitten bits were so adorable and I loved it. Meawhile, all the dog stuff with Mustang's subordinates had me snoring. YAWN)
14. Destruction's Right Hand - 3/5 (The art of badass entrances has been passed down the Armstrong line for generations! I love how stoically Armstrong walks past Ed, Al and Marcoh to lay a beatdown on Scar. Too bad that isn't until the end. The rest of this episode is a lot of reveals and story progression. Not much to comment on. It's just brutal how it begins with a the military massacring people in Liore)
15. The Ishbal Massacre - 4/5 (Stop TALKING so much when you're supposed to fight! I get it's necessary for exposition but I find it so ridiculous that while Scar just stands there silently, Armstrong just babbles on and on and makes a bunch of assumptions about his motives. Why doesn't Scar just shut him up and start attacking?
Anyway, this episode is about half flashbacks to the Ishbal war and- Wait, ROY KILLED WINRY'S PARENTS?! Now THAT'S just... Brutal. Ed is NOT gonna be happy when he finds that out)
16. That Which Is Lost - 4/5 (Not that I don't enjoy these episodes, but every time there's some sort of story progression up ahead, Ed and Al always find some bump in the road that causes a whole episode of events in between. And while this was still good, there isn't, like, MUCH of a story to it. Alphonse is taken off the train, so Ed follows him, gets his leg stolen and meets some guy and they talk. Just about philosophical stuff. And then he dips. And that's just the actual plot. The start of the episode is just full of scenes before they're about to travel. But this is not criticism, since I still like the slow pacing and time we get to spend with the characters. Especially Armstrong. So, screw you, Ed. His stories seem awesome. I'd listen to them. He's such a wholesome guy. Ed doesn't know what he's missing.
Alphonse's part in the episode had potential to be the best, but it kinda goes nowhere. Some kid steals the "armor" he finds and is about to fight some guys with it, but doesn't because Al talks him out of it. Or, rather, scares him off. But it would've been way more interesting to actually see a fight unfold, and Alphonse having to step in and take control of the situation. That could be when the thief realized the armor was alive. And, about that: How is he convinced this is some robotic, talking armor? Maybe if this was the 2010's that could be believable. But the 1910's? No way)
17. House of the Waiting Family - 4/5 (Just a pure, wholesome no-stakes episode about the brothers finally visiting "home" after all the years away in the big city. That's all there is to say about it. Winry being emotional about it and wanting them back is sweet. Pinako asking Armstrong about them is sweet. It's all sweet. I especially liked Ed and Al sparring, and Armstrong desperately wanting to join in. And when he eventually does, they both beat him. Haha)
18. Marcoh's Notes - 3/5 (Sheska is a cute character. I, uh, liked seeing Scar clash with the homunculi, and Hughes' conversation with Ross about encourarging the brothers)
19. The Truth Behind Truths - 3/5 (Alphonse is still extremely optimistic while Edward is sulking. As usual. It's funny that Ross, someone who they've only known for, what, a couple of days? Is the one to get him back on his feet with an inspirational speech. We barely know anything about her.
Also, I can't tell what Scar's intentions are. He is specifically chasing Edward, but I assume it's not to kill him, given the vague statements Lust gave him about how they're gonna use him. If he was still on a state alchemist killing spree, he would have just moved onto whoever he could get his hands on, right? ALSO also, Scar is on his way to the 5th labratory now because he knows that's where Edward is, but he only knows because Edward circled the labratory on the map on his table. WHY did he do that? It's not like that would be hard to remember. I guess it was just so Scar could find out!)
20. Soul of the Guardian - 4/5 (Fighting, fighting, fighting... A whole episode of nothing but Ed an Al fighting people, separately. Good, but NOT much to comment on. I only found the ending really endearing with the way Barry is convincing Alphonse that his memories are fake; Fabricated by Edward to use him. While Edward is simultaneously monologuing about how he considers his brother as real as ever. I thought the contrast was interesting, and the emotional music amped up when Alphonse is upset about it makes it better)
21. The Red Glow - 4/5 (Well this episode is just full of twists and hints. Greed was imprisoned in the 5th lab all along and escapes. Tucker returns, and it's pretty blatantly revealed that Lust is a recreation of whoever Scar's brother tried to bring back. Tucker's return is the most baffling and it's insanely creepy. Like, he's transmuted himself into a chimera (a bear?) but why does he look like... THAT? Why is his head upside down? You can see his upper front body is... On the hunchback... How does he orient himself? And why is he whispering?? And he's arguably just gotten more mentally twisted. He's just trying to make a Nina homunculus now. One that's "better" than the real one? And one of the clones in the vat still hairy like a dog but with a dead-eyed Nina face was creepy. Creepiness all around
Also, Edward be like "I won't kill anyone never ever ever" but then slice and dice a bunch of animals. Okay, they're not humans, but that's still brutal. I mean, there was so much blood)
22. Created Human - 5/5 (This episode feels so climactic. They've been building up a mystery and keeping the homunculi away from Ed and Al for so long, it's gratifying to finally have them meet eye to eye more than just catching Lust stalking them. We're finally getting some answers in this confrontation. Albeit a pretty stupid answer:
So, the homunculi were just leaving a trail of breadcrumbs about the stone so that someone would spend years researching it and sneak into this lab and transmute a bunch of prisoners into a philosopher's stone so that the homonculi can become human? That is SO convoluted. If that's their only goal, why didn't they just get some other skilled alchemist to do it? One that's already morally bankrupt and probably would? Like uh, I don't know, Kimblee? Would it not be a smarter plan to just break him out in exchanged for him making the stone, and letting him do as he wishes with it once they've become human?
And also, when Ed started hesitating and the tanks started breaking, why didn't Lust just kill Alphonse? Didn't she have her claws ready to do it? That seemed like the opportunity to. Like, yeah, I know that would leave Ed with no reason to not attack them, but I thought the point was to do it if he refused. Instead she just let the time run out and they got away... With the help of... Scar. Lol. Side note, Ed spazzing out in the red water looked pretty funny)
23. Fullmetal Heart - 4/5 (Well, here's a nice change of pace. In this, Alphonse is the one constantly sulking. For pretty stupid reasons, though. He keeps doubting his existence every time he can't remember something... Something from when he was like, a damn toddler. Of course he wouldn't remember a lot of that. Anyway, hearing him be so passive aggressive, and then straight on aggressive by telling Ed to "shut up" is so jarringly out of character that it works so great for the drama.
Hughes just TAKING Winry to his home is extremely weird. Like, maybe if he offered to let her stay there in a natural way, it would be fine. But he just grabs her and says she's lucky because she gets to meet his daughter, with no other context... Ok then. Also, the Hiromu Arakawa cow appearing when Ed and Winry argue about milk was a neat cameo)
24. Bonding Memories - 4/5 (This episode beginning with a bomb dropping on 2 Ishbalan's and killing them caught me off guard. Followed by a whole massacre the refugee camp. The brutality in this show is sky high. And Alphonse kicks ass in this episode. Literally and figuratively. Beating up the "military" men trying to kill the refugees was badass, and simply following his story of meeting these two Ishbalan brothers was endearing. As were the brothers. The fact that Alphonse is perfectly fine talking to Scar who desperately wants to kill his brother is wild, though. And then he proceeds to ask Scar a stupidly awkward question. No offense Al, but, really? You ask the killer?
Also, why was Barry still moving and making noises like he was struggling long after his transmutation circle burnt up? That made no sense)
25. Words of Farewell - 4/5 (Ed and Al are taking a train to... Meet Scar... After they said goodbye to him in the previous episode. Why didn't they just take the chance there?!?!?!? This is why I thought it was so stupid that they let just let him go instead of arresting him.
It's at least nice to see the story actually going somewhere instead of just a bunch of random adventures while the villains lurk in the background. Finally they're doing more and more to advance. This time by killing Hughes. Sad. His excessive babble about his daughter had grown on me)
26. Her Reason - 5/5 (Winry's love for automatil is a very cute character trait. I found it both cute and funny when the Ed got mad at the armwrestling guy for calling him short and Winry just laughs, but then gets just as mad as Ed when the guy insults the automail she made.
I don't really understand the conflict at the core of this episode, though. Ed used alchemy to win the armwrestling match, but that doesn't mean he doesn't like Winry's automail. He constantly praises it and says it's by the best mechanic. So what exactly is she trying to prove by teaming up with Paninya? To have Ed... Chase her? How does that prove a point? Also, how does that prove PANINYA'S point of trying to show how great HER mechanic's work is? Running around with a pocket watch? Wow, that sure is impressive...
Still, even if I found Winry's anger misplaced, she's such an endearing character and the fact that she is hurt by it makes me sad. I even got a bit teary eyed at the end when she started crying about it. Too bad that moment is quickly interrupted by Alphonse barging in)
27. Teacher - 3/5 (I guess this is similar to the Resembol episode, in which there are no big stakes and just the brothers reuniting with someone. This time their teacher. So, nothing really happens. Just some backstory of how they met. There's some part where a cat dies after giving birth to represent the continuation of life... Meh. The ending was whack, though. Izumi beats the crap out of the boys, and then emotionally hugs them)
28. All is One, One is All - 3/5 (Ed and Al surviving on an island for a month as seen both in the past and the present, told simultaneously. This one is okay, but nothing really happens... It's obvious the masked man is the guy who was with Izumi and Sig at dinner. They're just there again to reflect on their choices, or something)
29. The Untainted Child - 4/5 (A mysterious boy was all alone on the island? Now that's interesting. We finally see what happened to Edward during the human transmutation? Better. The mysterioys boy is a homonculus? OOOH... AND HE HAS EDWARD'S ARM AND LEG?! Now THESE are some interesting series of events, FINALLY. Side note, the boy's constant screaming when he transmuted himself with the bed was ANNOYING! I was so glad when Izumi shut him up. My ears were bleeding.
And the episode teases more mystery as well. Obviously it's suspenseful AND suspicious that the new, obviously evil Lieutenant Colonel wants to track down Ed and Al. Who also says there's a big battle coming? And has Armstrong alongside him, who clearly doesn't want him to find them)
30. Assault on South Headquarters - 3/5 (Well, I say I want more plot things to happen, but now it feels like a lot of them are happening without much substance in between. It's weird pacing. There's a lot of episodes where basically nothing of importance happens, then there's ONE where a TON of things happen.
So here we have:
- Yoki is reporting Scar's location to the military so they will come and arrest him
- Lieutenant Colonel wants to take the homunculus boy
- So does Greed, for whatever reason
- Kimblee is working with Greed
- The boy is a recreation of Izumi's unborn child
31. Sin - 4/5 (So the we're finally being told how a homunculus is made, even though this has been pretty obvious before now. Well, somewhat. Obviously we've known they're the result of human transmutation. But even with this explanation, it's a little unclear HOW. The logic of the "gate" is a little unclear, but that's probably on purpose. I did like the reveal that the Wrath's arm and leg are, in fact, Edward's (even though we knew this, it's just I thought the scene was cool).
My real question is, why are they all named after the 7 deadly sins?? And, instantly after realizing he's a homunculus, Wrath also wants to "become human". WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?? Your body is in the exact shape of a human. You look human. You can think and feel like a human. You have self awareness. Except you ALSO have cool powers. I really don't see why being a homunculus isn't just a win. Side note, loled at Greed running off when confronted by Sloth and Envy)
32. Dante of the Deep Forest - 3/5 (Alphonse heroically defending his brother is awesome! It gives you chills when Alphonse is the one stepping up and getting seriously angry. Even willing to kill, I think? He seemed pretty willing to absolutely destroy Wrath, anyway. He doesn't, BUT, someone else is killed. Yoki. That way he was shot mid-sentence startled me. Yikes. Roy gearing up to burn all those Ishbalan refugees was quite a shock too, but the scene was over after we only saw his hand ignite a small flame, so, I never found out, this episode at least, if he actually did it. Surely not?
They're trying to keep reveals at arms length here, but the fact that Sloth LOOKS like Trisha, the reveal that homunculi are made from human transmutation, and the fact that Alphonse was about to ask Edward about it but received no answers... Obviously Sloth was made by them. Get to "revealing" it already, I wanna see their reaction, dammit!
Also, all this talk about equivalent exchange as a philosophy is driving me nuts. It's not a philosophy! In terms of alchemy, it's literally science. It's equivalent exchange because you can't spawn matter out of thin air. You have too use molecules from something else to form something new! It's not deeper than that! Argh!)
33. Al, Captured - 3/5 (Well, THAT was a mysterious scene between Izumi and Dante. Why would she assume Dante had anything to do with Alphonse being kidnapped? Also, no offense to Alphonse, but he's literally the worst at strategizing to escape capture. He straight up reveals his weakspot to the woman inside his armor. That was DUMB. And then refuses to help Greed simply because he's a "bad person". I mean, I get his sentiment, but couldn't he pretend to cooperate long enough to gain their trust and make an escape, or to buy time for Edward to find him? He's risking a lot by sitting there being cocky.
Lot of time here is just spend standing in the same room and arguing with Greed. Sig stepping up and helping Izumi was nice at least. It's pretty funny how big and strong he is, yet she's the only one truly kicking ass)
34. Theory of Avarice - 3/5 (By the end of the episode I was literally thinking "Where the heck is Winry right now? She never went home to Resembol, but the boys and Izumi are spread about everywhere. Is she still at Izumi's home?" And whaddya know, this episode begins by showing me exactly that.
Gotta love Armstrong. He's been under Lieutenant Colonel Archer's command and clearly does not approve of his decisions and rejects orders every time he's not around. He literally says finding Alphonse is not a priority, then bursts in to save him. Stand-up guy.
Then the rest of this episode is mostly about Greed. Who, in my opinion, is not really that interesting. There's some scenes showing how loyal his goons are, then he fights Edward and dies. Of course dying by the hands of Edward was of big importance since it's the first time Ed has killed anyone. Although the way he was talking, both in last episode and this, I assumed he was open to the idea. So I thought when he impaled Greed, it was with the purpose to kill him. But then he gets surprised and traumatized when he dies because of it. Anyway, judging by the end, they're finally leaving Dublith. The episodes there have not been nearly as interesting as the ones before it, so, I'm happy)
35. Reunion of the Fallen - 4/5 (Well, this was an interesting episode. It's really mostly about Lust. Edward and Alphonse are hardly in it. I found that, and the dark/rainy atmosphere of the whole episode, really interesting. But still a little confused by her actions. It seemed to be she grew pretty fond of the guy she was helping cure a disease in his town, but maybe I was wrong and she truly is just a manipulative bitch who never cared? Or she really only liked him for the memories of Scar's brother he manages to bring back? Because she kills him in the end for no reason at all, and calls him a mistake.
This episode makes me question how long these homunculi have been trying to bait random alchemists to transmute a philosophers stone for them. Like, their ENTIRE lives has been nothing but baiting, but still getting no catch. Must be annoying)