I started dating this guy, let's call him Jake. Jake is wonderful, he's lovely, i fell so hard for him and so fast, we both instantaneously connected and i genuinely feel like we were made for each other.
Now there's this other dude. He's almost the complete opposite of Jake, and we're gonna call him Nikki. Nikki and I talked for a little bit, and he took care of me for days when I ran away from home. He became my FP for a while and i was obsessed. We had a good fuck, i felt connected to him, and i wanted to be his girl so badly. But he was emotionally unavailable and even after numerous talks with him about our relationship, we concluded that he wasnt ready for a relationship. Which was fine by me, as long as he still texted me often and showed at least some interest. As time went on he began to play a push and pull game that drove me fucking insane, though i tried not to show it did.
Now that im publicly dating Jake, he's liked every post ive posted with him. Which is odd, bc he doesnt usually like my stuff. When i texted him and asked him if he was going to a certain concert, he was really dry and sent only one message at a time. Complete switch up. This (of course) triggered my abandonment issues and i felt as if i was losing him, a man that was and maybe still is my FP and i began to panic.
Jake is so amazing. I dont want to ruin this, but i find myself being more drawn to Nikki. The fact that he has switched up on me RIGHT AFTER he saw me w another dude infuriates me but makes me want him back even more.
Im so fucking frustrated with myself. I dont want to lose this beautiful relationship i have with Jake, but i also dont wanna lose Nikki. Advice/tips?

To start things off, I was always aware of our age gap and problems it may cause in our relationship.
My husband and I didn't meet until I was well into being eighteen, and he was twenty-eight. It didn't bother me much, as he doesn't act much older than me and I'd always felt older than I was due to having a ton of younger siblings, step siblings, and foster kids in and out of my mother's house growing up.
We got engaged when I was nineteen at a yungblood concert, and we originally planned to wait to marry until I was at least twenty. Plans changed when I decided to go into the air force, and we had to push up the wedding in order for him to eventually stay with me on base after basic training.
Fast forward a few months after we were married and I had left for Texas for training, I was injured during PT training and sent home. It was during the craziest parts of covid, so everything was on lockdown and they had strict rules about not keeping anyone on base for a long period of time if injured. I was medically discharged and sent home to heal and have potential surgery.
At the time, my husband was staying with his friend in the city we planned to move to. We already put down a deposit on an apartment when we found out I was going home, but due to Covid restrictions and eviction restrictions, it was returned to us and we were told we could no longer move in.
The first issue I was seeing when I got home was his disattention to me. I was gone for over a month and missed celebrating my twentieth birthday with anyone but the girls in medhold with me, so I was looking forward to spending quality time with my husband.
We went out to eat with his friend, his friend's girlfriend, and one of her friends. I felt like a fifth wheel during the meal, as I was sat at the end of the table instead of being at my husband's side where her friend was sitting. Most of the conversations didn't include me, and I ended up going back to his friend's place feeling let down.
The rest of the time we were staying with his friend, they wanted all of us to go mountain climbing, cliff jumping, and trekking through the woods as they lived in a nature-centered part of the area. (Keep in mind, I was just sent home for being injured, and I had both a knee and ankle brace on my right leg that prevented much movement other than some hobbled walking that was slower than a normal pace).
When I expressed that I wasn't comfortable doing those things and that I wouldn't be jumping thirty feet into a freezing lake when I could barely walk as it is, my husband got upset with me and eventually just left me there alone while they all went to hang out together.
Flash forward four years, it is now 2024 and we have a two-year-old toddler. I didn't end up getting surgery, and I spent nine months being sicker than I'd ever been in my life.
It was a really rough pregnancy for me, and I'd ended up in the hospital multiple times because I couldn't even smell food or step foot into our kitchen without throwing up.
That all went on until the beginning of my third trimester. We decided to travel back to his friend's place, and I was somehow roped into climbing cliffs, wading through treacherous water to climb another cliff on an island out in the middle of a lake, and sleep at the top of sand dunes in a tent on the ground a couple weeks before my due date.
I was then on antibiotics during birth, because my water broke and the hospital sent me home instead of keeping me. My son was born sick, and transferred to a children's hospital to be treated and receive a spinal tap. I ended up sleeping a week in a hard hospital chair in a leaking basement of the hospital because they didn't have enough space for us.
After we were home and everything was settled, my husband would brag about how difficult the whole situation was for him. He had to sleep on a futon during my labour, and he had to have food doordashed to the hospital because, due to covid restrictions, noone else was allowed in with us and he wasn't allowed to leave to get anything.
He ended up having steak, potatoes, and these other elaborate meals delivered to eat in front of me while I wasn't allowed to eat anything until the baby came out. He even thought about bringing his playstation into the hospital room, but I shut that down quickly.
The first year of my son's life, I went back and forth between staying home with him and working in the factory my husband currently works at while my grandma watched our son.
I won't get into too much detail, but at one point when my grandma moved back out of state (she lives in her camper and was only there for the summer), I had to switch to the afternoon shift.
There is a factory supervisor on that shift that is a male and close to my husband's age. Other than the other person in my same position and two maintenance workers, they only had migrant workers that didn't speak english. This limited the people I could talk to while working my twelve hour shifts (husband worked 3:30 am to 3:30 pm and I would work 3:30 pm to 3:30 am).
My husband got very jealous and territorial at this time. He would expect me to return nearly thirty minutes late from all my breaks, threaten to go up there if anyone told me I couldn't do that, and even punched a hole in the wall when I told him I had to get back to work.
Up until that point, my husband had shown no signs of aggression toward me.
Somehow, a rumour started to spread around the factory that I was sleeping with the production lead. This definitely wasn't true as a) how and where would I have done that? and b) I loved my husband and would have never done something like that.
My husband heard about it, and came home to confront me. He got in my face, screaming and calling me a cheater. He threatened to take our son and move back in with his mom without even letting me offer an explanation or defend myself.
To this day, it still bothers me that he is still so convinced that I cheated on him and that he has no trust in me whatsoever to not do something like that.
I ended up leaving that job and working at mcdonalds for a little while. I had worked there in high school, so it wasn't a big adjustment.
I only ended up staying there a few months to help us catch up on bills before we agreed it would be better for me to stay home with our son for a while.
Our son is two now, and it seems like our relationship has only become more strained. We used to be able to communicate most of our smaller issues and come up with ways to maneuver whatever issues we had. However, in June of last year, my husband's friend that we were staying with in the beginning moved across the state to be near us.
It was all fine and good in the beginning. He had proposed to his girlfriend, and they even asked the both of us to be in their wedding that has yet to happen.
However, once they got engaged, he'd began acting very sexist. Even though both he and his fiance work full time (he works down the road at the factory with my fiance, and she works forty minutes away at a hardware store and has to drive a long way at three in the morning to get there), he expects her to come home and clean up after him, also cook his meals before she goes to bed early to get up really early in the morning for work the next day.
My husband, now hanging out with him more often, started having some of these things wearing off on him.
At first, it wasn't a big deal and I brushed it off. However, I'd gotten a job as a property manager for an apartment complex and also work now. Instead of things changing to adapt our new lifestyle, my husband expects me to continue keeping up with all the chores and cooking.
He'd made a comment that, because he feeds our dogs, he expects me just to do everything that involves our toddler from feeding him, to changing his butt, to putting him to bed at night. It's like pulling teeth sometimes to get him to change his butt or even get pants on him.
We'd gotten into an argument over this, and I told him that it wasn't fair that he expected me to do everything. His response was that he made more money and worked more hours, so it was only fair that I covered everything else.
Sure, I don't work as much or make as much money, and my paychecks mainly cover our son's daycare and our car payments, but I feel like working doesn't excuse him from helping with the son we both decided to have.
It's gotten to the point where I told my husband that if any sexist remark is made, like I should be in the kitchen helping get dinner ready whenever we're at his friend's house, I will be leaving and going back home, and I won't be going back until it is resolved.
The friend's fiance and I have had private conversations about this, and we both agree that it has gotten out of hand, and we both believe they are feeding off each other as they'd never been that bad before.
Everything has only seemed to get worse from there.
We decided to go as a group, along with my brother and his girlfriend, to the draft in Detroit this year.
The whole point was to see players get drafted in person, and we'd managed to get into the crowd in front of the stage before the area was shut down and they weren't allowing anyone else in.
My brother is an avid football fan. He played in high school, and was even offered multiple scholarships to play in college. This was a once in a lifetime experience for the both of us.
At one point, my husband and his friend decided that they would rather stand at one of the screens out of the crowd and watch it instead of trying to get into the sea of people to see it live.
I was frustrated, and expressed that if we wanted to watch it on television that we should have just stayed home. After a heated argument, I thought we'd come to the agreement that we'd go back to the stage and watch it there.
My brother lead us through the crowd, and at the beginning my husband and his friend were following us. Somehow, we'd gotten separated and when I looked back once we found a spot to stand, they were gone.
My phone rang in my pocket, and when I picked it up it was my husband calling. As soon as I picked it up, he proceeded to scream at me for disappearing and called me a "stupid bitch" when I tried to explain that I thought they were following us.
He hung up, and I told my brother I was going to go look for them alone. I spent a good twenty minutes wandering the area that was barricaded, but they were nowhere to be found. I no longer had signal to get ahold of him, so I ended up just going back and watching the beginning of the draft with my brother.
By the eighth pick, texts started to come in from my husband. He had informed me that they all left, leaving the three of us alone. Luckily, I'd driven separate as I left work early to get there.
By that point, I was done with him. I felt disrespected and that hanging out with his friend was more important than making sure his wife was okay or even with him. After all, I was wandering downtown Detroit alone when it was starting to get dark out.
When the three of us inevitably got back to the car, I got ahold of my husband just to let him know we were on our way home. He tried to apologise and ask how everything was, but I was too exhausted and mad at him to try and hold a conversation. He was asleep by the time I got home, and I ended up sleeping in our spare bedroom on a futon.
The next day, my husband tried to act like nothing happened. When I expressed that I felt ignored and pretty much useless to him, he tried to play it off like his anger was warranted and completely ignored the fact that he was calling me names.
I told him that I was no longer going to any big events with him and his friend, and he just rolled his eyes like he didn't believe me.
A day later, I saw a message pop up on his phone from his friend. I guess he had told him what I said about not going anywhere anymore, and his friend said "women" with an eyeroll emoji and "she'll get over it eventually". I screenshotted these messages and sent them to myself, filing them away in a folder in my phone to keep for later.
I slept in our spare bedroom for a week after that.
After the draft, I've also kept notes in my phone with time and date stamps of all the times he went off on me since then. Whenever we get into arguments, my mind goes blank and I forget exact things like this so he likes to say it never happened if I can't remember it.
April 27th, we were sitting watching videos together on tiktok. When someone popular came on that he had been watching a lot recently, I exclaimed that I didn't understand how he got popular all of a sudden. He proceeded to get really agitated and yell at me for not understanding how the internet works. When I stood up to walk away because I was upset, this angered him more. He then expressed that my emotions were overrated and that he was sick of them.
May 2nd, I had gotten home from work and tried to show my husband an outdoor jungle gym on amazon that I thought would be cool to get our son. He claimed it was a waste of money and that we should just take him to the park. When I tried to explain that it was a better idea to get something like this, as realistically we wouldn't take him to the park every day, he freaked out and asked what was wrong with me. He then said "oh my god" when I tried to explain that it would be easier to watch him outside while getting stuff done around the house and decided to just go to bed without dinner and end the conversation completely.
May 5th, we went with his friend and fiance to a cinco de may party in the city. He was drinking most of the day, and on the way home he wanted us to stop some place and get ice cream. When he got out of the car, he hit it against the car next to us. When I told him he'd hit the car, he proceeded to yell at me in the crowd that I was crazy and acting like my mother. He then kept trying to go to the woman in the car and ask if he had, in fact, hit her car. After, he said he was done with me and I was on my own, that I would have to start paying my own bills from now on.
There's been many other entries in my notes similar to this, and I feel like I'm at the end of what I can handle. Divorce has crossed my mind, but I had divorced parents growing up and know how hard it would be on my son. I also don't think I'm in a well off financial position to go out on my own with our son and still provide the things he needs.
I also worry that, if we were to separate, he would push to take our son from me as he'd threatened in the past to do so.
Any advice would be helpful, as I don't know what else to do. Even getting this all off my chest online makes me feel a little better, but there's still the lingering thought in the back of my mind that I'm unhappy and don't know how much longer I can put up with this.
Thank you.

I finally published for the first time. Not the first time I've finished a novel, but certainly the first time I have actively published one .. one that I've been a little proud of. I know it's a long process to get noticed, or even start to see some traction in sales & downloads, but how do you go about promoting your novel? I feel like I'm stuck. 😕
Beginning of chapter one below - if anyone would like to provide feedback that would be lovely. 🙂
[2,310] It began like a surreal haze, a fever dream dancing with unknown figures swirling around her like a languid tornado, their movements seemingly slowed by some unseen force as she awoke to a world spinning out of her control. She found herself surrounded by strangers who moved like spectres in a dream, fragmented flashes who assaulted her consciousness - a woman gently pressing a cloth to her throbbing head, another offering sips of water while she coughed and struggled to swallow, a man peering down at her with a furrowed brow, and a mysterious figure lingering in the doorway with an unsettling glint of desire in his eyes.
The room buzzed with a quiet urgency as they hovered around her, their faces etched with concern and something else she couldn't quite place - an undercurrent of tension that seemed to pulse in time with her own racing heart. These disjointed images flitted in and out, creating a mosaic of fragmented reality. Awake, her body throbbed with pain; asleep, she plunged into a black abyss, time slipping away unnoticed. Each awakening brought the desire for oblivion as her mind plunged back into the depths of darkness.
Beth jolted upright, startled by the sharp bang of a car backfiring. A cry of pain escaped her lips as she attempted to sit up, her back and legs resisting her will. A woman, the same from her fleeting visions, hurried into the room with a damp cloth and a glass of water.
"Easy now," the woman spoke gently, her mild Spanish accent adding warmth to her sharp words as she pressed the cloth to Beth's forehead and helped her sit up, "you're weak, rushing won't do you any favours. The sooner you regain strength, the sooner you can move."
A man, the one with the odd expression in her visions, appeared in the doorway once again; "and the sooner we can leave this place, I'm sick of it." He grumbled, striding away with urgency and frustration. His steps were heavy and fraught with agitation, each one seeming to leave a deep imprint on the ground beneath him. His grumbling was like distant thunder, punctuated by the clenching of his jaw and the tightening of his fists.
"Don't mind my brother," the woman interjected sharply, "it's not you - he hates everyone." Hate, Beth pondered, wondering what she might have done to earn his disdain.
"Are you hungry?" The woman stood, walking to the other side of the room to adjust another pillow behind Beth's back. Beth nodded; "I'll get you some soup."
Left alone, Beth surveyed the room - beige walls, a shattered TV, torn brown curtains. She squinted at the notepad on the side table, revealing the branding - Mill Village Motel Eatonville. The coffee pod machine at the room's far end, covered in dust, hinted at a neglected past.
"You're awake," startled, Beth turned to find the man with the furrowed brow at the door - tall and dark, with piercing brown eyes, he appeared softer now, "how are you feeling?" Beth managed a brief smile before adjusting herself, wincing in pain. He rushed to offer a hand, and she took his arm to shift as he adjusted the pillow.
"Want to give walking a try?" The man's warm, brown eyes crinkled at the edges as he smiled down at her, his features etched with concern, his furrowed brow now smooth and his brown eyes sparkled with an unfamiliar kindness.
She shook her head, and the woman returned with soup and water; "she needs to eat before attempting to walk, Austin," she said, setting the tray before Beth.
"Then we'll try again tomorrow," Austin expressed, heading towards the door, "the sooner we leave, the better - we've been here for too long." His footsteps echoed with determination and authority, less frustrated than the other man's but equally resolute.
"I apologise if it's cold. Heating options are limited here. Need a hand?" The woman offered. Beth shook her head, the pounding of her headache resonating through her body.
"Well I'll leave you to it then. Shout out if you need anything, if you can talk at all." Beth glanced down at her bowl of soup, parting her lips as if to speak, but no words escaped. A deep sigh escaped from the woman's mouth as she turned and left the room, leaving Beth alone with her cold, untouched meal. The silence in the room was deafening, broken only by the sound of muffed chatter outside.
The days stretched longer as Beth's need for rest diminished. Boredom and confusion settled in, intensifying as the people from her visions became tangible presences, moving in and out of her room. They attended to her needs but seldom engaged in conversation. At night, their muffled voices in the adjoining room became a distant comfort, and the faint echoes of their arguments a source of intrigue.
"We need to leave," a frustrated male voice pierced through the thin walls, "we have to head further south before winter traps us with little supplies and an extra mouth to feed - considering you're all so intent on keeping this girl alive."
"This woman," a familiar female voice retorted, likely the one who had been caring for her, "needed help - I distinctly remember a time when I wasn't doing well and needed it too."
"You're my sister, of course, I wasn't going to leave you behind."
"I'm not talking about you, Luis," she yelled, "I'm talking about before you came back from Minnesota and found me."
"Why can't we just leave her here with some supplies and a gun. Why do we need to bring her with us?"
"Jesus Christ Luis we're not leaving her here alone and you two can have it out later," intervened another man, "but Luis is right - we need to leave before the snow settles in."
The argument faded into muffled voices again, and Beth strained to catch the words exchanged between the trio. A knock at the door startled her.
"May I come in?" A young girl, the same from her visions, had opened the door quietly without her even noticing. "I thought the yelling might have woken you." Beth nodded, maintaining her silence.
"I'm Chantelle." Her soft Southern accent flowed like a gentle breeze through a cornfield. She pulled up a chair beside the bed. "Luis can get into it with everybody, but he means well. Well, no, that's a lie. I don't know why I said that. He's a dick."
"I gathered," Beth whispered and laughed a little, suddenly overtaken by a violent cough.
Chantelle rushed to hand her water; "so, you do speak. From the way Austin and Val were sayin' it, it sounded like you were mute. I thought, you couldn't be deaf because you've been nodding and smiling like a dang puppet."
Beth laughed and took another sip; "I didn't really have anything worth saying until now. No one has bothered to make conversation."
"Your accent, where are you from?" Chantelle sat down on the wooden chair, her long dark hair cascading down her back in gentle curls. Her bright brown eyes sparkled with kindness as she looked towards Beth.
"Australia," Beth paused, realising she hadn't thought about home for a while, "I'm from Australia," she repeated.
Chantelle pulled out a deck of cards; "well, I figured you might be bored and needed a little human interaction that didn't make you feel like you were in a hospital."
Beth's eyes lit up, and Chantelle smiled; "what do you want to play?"
— — —
"What do you think you are doing?" Austin stormed into the motel room.
"We're leaving. Today," Luis' words cut through the air.
"The van's still in bad shape, and we won't survive this winter on foot." Austin's arms were folded tightly across his chest, the muscles in his biceps and forearms bulging with tension. His jaw was clenched, and his brows furrowed in frustration.
"Then fix the damn van!" Luis yelled, the sound piercing through the walls and resonating outside the motel room for others to hear the heated exchange.
"Oh, sorry, I'll just take it down the road to the mechanic, shall I?" Austin raised a quizzical eyebrow, smirking at his friend. The men paused their argument, exchanging laughter.
"Luis, what's going on with you?" Austin softened his tone, taking a seat on the other bed. "We've been friends since high school, grew up together, served in the army together. This isn't you."
"I don't know, man." Luis sat on the other bed, facing his friend, his face buried in his hands. He rubbed his face hard, threw his head back, and sighed heavily. "This just isn't—" he paused.
"Isn't what?"
"Isn't life." Luis gestured around the room.
"We'll get to the coast, find a boat, just like we planned." There was a slight taste of bitterness in the air, as if Austin's mild frustration was tangible.
"And then what?"
"Do the best we can," Austin stood up, placing a hand on his friend's shoulder, "we all have our dark moments, brother. You helped me get through mine, I'll help you get through yours."
Austin walked out of the motel room into the crisp morning air. The atmosphere was fresh, with a subtle scent of dew and grass. The sweet aroma of winter's imminent arrival filled the air, mingling with the faint scent of burning oil from their broken down van across the parking lot.
"Ben thinks he can fix the van by tomorrow. He found the parts we need on the other side of town." Val caught Austin as he had walked outside.
"He went scouting alone?" Austin looked across the lot at Ben, deep into the hood of the black church van they had found a while back.
Chantelle bounded up before she could answer; "Beth seems much better today. She's eatin' and drinkin' more. I think she could try walkin' today."
"Beth?" Val and Austin remarked in unison.
"Mmm, she speaks - she might have a lot more to say if either of you bothered to converse with her instead of just talkin' to her." She walked off towards Ben, a light air in her hopeful stride.
— — —
Austin found Beth sitting on the edge of her bed, her feet bare and dangling idly over the side. Her toes were curled, squeezing them tightly as she wiggled them back and forth. Her face was tense with concentration as she tried to alleviate the tingling sensation in her feet.
"Beth." His voice was soothing and calming, his words spoken with a gentle tone as he tried to ease Beth's discomfort.
"Chantelle?" She looked up at him, as he nodded, smiling gently. "She's a good kid." She smiled and looked back at her toes.
"Do you want to try walking today?" He walked towards the chair on the other side of the room and sat down as it creaked underneath the weight of him.
"The sooner I can walk, the sooner you can get out of here." She said with a sarcastic air, mocking Luis.
"The sooner we can get out of here." He repeated sarcastically with a smile, a light spread of jest washing over him as he joined her in mocking his friend.
"Your friend Luis seems to be very against bringing me along with you." She looked back at him.
"I'm not in the business of leaving people behind. Especially in Washington in the middle of October," he sat forward, leaning his elbows on his knees, "you wouldn't survive the winter."
"Then maybe you should have just left me to die." She turned her body to face him abruptly. He opened his mouth to speak, but she interjected before he could respond.
"Why did you help me? You don't know me, why did you even bother?"
"Like I said, Beth," he stood up, his wistful tone switching back to cold and dry, "I'm not in the business of leaving people behind." He walked over to her slowly.
"I've lost too many people. I've watched people kill others over a can of soup. I've seen friends leave friends behind to save themselves," he sat down on the end of her bed, "I don't leave people behind."
His brown eyes cut through his words like a thunderstorm. She looked at his face, tired and weathered from sleepless nights with one eye open to ensure his group's safety. She pegged him as their leader - strong and determined with clear military training.
"What happened to you?" She asked softly.
"What happened to you?" He countered; "I refuse to believe you survived a pandemic alone for six months in a foreign country."
She said nothing and looked back at her feet. They sat in silence for a while before he stood up and headed for the door.
"We're leaving the day after tomorrow. We need to head south before it's too cold, and we don't know how long the van or the car will last, so part of that might be on foot."
"I'll try walking today." Beth nodded obediently.
"I'll send Val and Chantelle in to help you." He replied, his voice maintaining the cold cadency.
"Thank you." She smiled, wriggling her toes as the numbness started to dissipate. Before he could leave, she looked up at him again.
"Austin?" He stopped at the door and turned to her. "I know you've all done a lot for me, including putting your friendship with Luis on the line, so thank you. But I have a favour to ask," her voice grew quiet, "before we leave."
"What is it?" He asked sternly at her audacity to ask for another favour.
She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. He noticed her green eyes glisten with the added layer of acridity and the change in her demeanour; "before we leave, I need you to help me bury my husband."

Blue Reflection Ray is a multifaceted universe that seamlessly blends the allure of magical girl narratives with deeply resonant themes of friendship, self-discovery, and overcoming personal obstacles. At its core, the series revolves around the lives of two high school girls, Hiori Hirahara and Ruka Hanari, whose destinies intertwine when they are granted extraordinary powers.
In the anime adaptation, viewers are immersed in a visually stunning world where the lines between reality and fantasy blur. The animation style is both vibrant and ethereal, perfectly complementing the enchanting narrative. As Hiori and Ruka navigate the complexities of adolescence, they must also confront otherworldly threats that endanger their world. Their journey is not only one of physical battles but also of emotional growth and introspection.
Each character in "Blue Reflection Ray" is intricately crafted, with their own motivations, fears, and aspirations. From the determined yet compassionate Hiori to the reserved yet fiercely loyal Ruka, every character adds depth and richness to the story. As the series progresses, viewers are treated to moments of triumph, heartbreak, and profound self-discovery.
The game series offers players the opportunity to delve even deeper into the world of "Blue Reflection." Through immersive gameplay mechanics, players can experience firsthand the exhilaration of harnessing magical powers, forging bonds with unforgettable characters, and unraveling the mysteries that shroud the universe. From engaging in epic battles to embarking on poignant character-driven quests, the game series offers a truly immersive experience that allows players to become fully immersed in the enchanting world of "Blue Reflection."
Overall, whether you're a fan of captivating storytelling, breathtaking animation, or immersive gameplay, "Blue Reflection Ray" is a series that promises to captivate and inspire audiences of all ages. With its richly developed characters, spellbinding narrative, and stunning visuals, it's a journey that is sure to leave a lasting impression long after the final credits roll.

CANCER ZODIAC TAROT READING - UNEXPECTED INCOME MAY 2024

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJ5mIkLhCyY
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Another browse of TOMT, another attempt at finding this weird animated show I swear I watched when I was young. The details are very hazy and I dont remember too much but here goes:
The cartoon was about this girl who I think came from the real world and this boy who lives in the books and newspapers and magazines. I remember it being somewhat serialised, but it could also be adventure of the week style? I also cant remember if the girl returned to the real world after each adventure, or if she was stuck and the point of the entire show was attempting to return her to the real world. Im more inclined to believe it's the latter, as I have a little recollection of the girl constantly worrying about getting home and her parents being worried or something akin to that.
I remember the style of the show being very newspaper and magazine cut out style, kind of lile Angela Anaconda but not quite as realistic? Charlie and Lola but less childish and more grey and realistic.
I remember there being a stack of newspaper and magazines somewhere. I remember vaguely them getting sucked into swirly whirleys as they jump through worlds and newspapers through like, tears and stuff. I remember vaguely the boy being sort of chipper and like happy go lucky ish and go with the flow solve the problem ish and the girl being more negative and unsure and uptight. I swear they were teenager ish aged. There might have been a tree house involved but i could also be making that up.
I also have a scene in my head where the two were sitting together and looking at the stars together, and the girl eventually falls asleep on the boy's shoulders and there was meant to be sort of a hint to a twist to the boy's back story (i suspect he was from the real world and ran away or something). I never saw it again to confirm, i dont know if there is an ending but im vety interested to find out what happened in the end.
Im sorry the memories are very fractured but any help would be incredibly appreciated. Hopefully my mind didny just make it up.

we met at work, he's one of my managers (we're the same age). I could tell he liked me, we'd spend 8 hour shifts shoulder to shoulder laughing while everyone else gave us looks and afterwards he'd wanna go out for a drive. he was showing up to work unscheduled just to see me, he asked me out to the movies, was buying me gifts, planning dates and telling me sweet things. I was a virgin, I hadn't even had my first kiss yet and suddenly he was making it clear he wanted to fuck. we ended up getting intimate one of the first times I went back to his place. he told me I was the girl of his dreams. he asked me if we were official, it was all happening so fast but I liked him. I said yes. He introduced me to his parents within the first week but he no longer was planning dates and compliments grew scarce. after a month we had sex, there was little to no aftercare. they stopped scheduling us together at work, so after that I'd only see him 2 nights a week and whenever id come over he'd just play video games (sometimes with headphones on) until he got bored and was ready for bed. I'd give him a blowjob and afterwards he'd touch me but there would be no kissing/talking. zero foreplay. zero aftercare. he started getting mean, I realized hes actually very frugal (which confused me considering how generous he was at the start) he tried to give me a budget on the money I was spending with my friends, he'd snap at me in public and call me annoying, still I never complained. he dumped me after a few months. his reason was "I realized I dont feel the same, I know its not nice to hear but I didnt want you to feel used" but now I do. AITAH

I was hoping somebody could recommend me some documentaries that have used more elaborate recreations with actors and dialogue possibly done more slap stick or sketch comedy style. I know there are plenty of documentaries on comedians or sketch comedy but what I'm looking for specifically is comedy created for the documentary itself inspired by the talking heads from the sit down interviews. Something like Drunk History or Chapelle Show's Rick James and Prince stories might be the closest to what I'm thinking but would prefer to see something more digestible over a feature length. The documentary The Saints of Second Chances (2023) used actor Charlie Day for the recreations in a goofy fun way that is probably the most similar to what I am looking for but even those didn't have any dialogue in the recreations. Pepsi, Where is my Jet?(2022) was a very fun documentary where they were able to create humor with creative montages and creative editing so even recommendations like that are still helpful. Thanks in advance!
Clip of Charlie Day in a recreation for The Saints of Second Chances - https://vimeo.com/868370294/7de3267ecd?share=copy

Hi people. Last Sunday I (31M) had a BBQ with my mother, sister, and my sister's friend (22). My mom knows I want to get married and that Sunday I got bombarded with details about my sister's friend. It looks like we're quite compatible, we like the same food, have similar hobbies, want couple of children and we'd raised them quite similarly. We both want to live in South of France/Spain/Italy, they even go to vacation this summer (my mom, my sis, and her friend) and she asked me if I'll be there (unfortunately I can't), she said we should definitely do something, she loves theme park and wants to go to Portaventura, Spain, she said we could rent a villa, etc...
During the BBQ she sat next to me and we talked politics and stuff. My sister wants to work with horses, so time to time I'm looking at equestrian estates, and I don't remember why, I talked about a house near the Mediterranean I saw and liked. My sister's friend, laughing, said if there is any room for her she's in.
When talking (not privately, we never had any private conversation for the matter) she said (to my mother) that her last relationship wasn't a thing, she's single, and she'd want to get married but at same time she's quite afraid to be with the wrong guy. Later on, when passing by, I caught up my sister and her looking at baby's names, and when I asked what they were watching, they said "nothing" and giggled.
A similar situation happened last month (with same girl) and while she was there, my mother said, laughing, that if I don't get married soon, she'll find me someone. (She wants those grand-children).
But here the thing, I live under the same roof (different stories) with my mom and sis, which means I will end up seeing her friend one way or the other when she comes around, and I don't want to misinterpret these situations. I also being quite reserved to ask my lil' sis about this, I mean, imagine you're 19 and your 31 yo brother asking about your best friend...
I'm kind of thinking, it's nothing, I'm imagining things, she just want to be friendly and nothing else but at the same time she piqued my interest and now I can't get her out of my head.
What do you think about this situation? Am I that dumb? Is there a scheme going on in this female trio or Am I overthinking it?
PS: My birthday is in 15 days, I think they prepare something. Should I wait until then, see if there is anything? Or should I text my sister's best friend to see if she wants to do something together? The good weather showing up, I want to go hiking, I learned she likes it too, wanted to go with my sister but my sister isn't really into that. Should I use this pretext to text her and see where it goes?

Just like that our holy roller is back on live being all hoodrat, talkin about waiting for people to pull up, she has her pew pew, she “be” on reddit and all dat (her language is fkn hysterical)…...what happened to iesus scammy?? He didnt show up this afternoon like amazon??? Girl you a big ass joke 🤡

Morris stayed hidden for days, of course he wasn’t the only one left behind. A burned drone who would not wake up, a student named Kerr, and a drone seemingly losing all touch with reality named Luther. They barricaded the room of the patient, and stayed in there for weeks as the room was well off the beaten path. One day, Kerr asked “So what are your stories?” when there was nothing to do. “I was part of the WDF at one point, as I was part of the military grade drone experiment. The others left me to die, but I didn’t and now here we are…” said Luther. Morris decided now was a good time to reveal his crimes, “I was part of a test of drone software stability against viruses, unfortunately I never regained complete stability. The parts of my software that were for sympathy and morals were corrupted, along with a thirst for violence appearing… have you heard the stories of the drone named Morris? That’s me, and most of them are true… I also killed several drones here. I was gonna torch the bodies but the undead stopped me, and the events up to here were (Go read the last couple chapters except for Fade to Gray).”
[Malkor hosting enabled] I saw the shocked expressions on their faces, and smiled slightly… I then told them of the transmission I got from the teacher. “What’s your story Kerr?” I asked calmly, knowing very well the free oil supply that was the burned drone wouldn’t speak. “Well… I was studying to reinforce the doors, and also founded a little group called ‘Delta Company’ which basically was enforcing military restrictions on the other students…” I cracked up, “Alright we got a drone in white plaster, a fascist, Yossarian, and a psychopathic killer… well this should be a great group for Delta Company.” Kerr rolled her eyes, “Sure, it didn’t become a thing because the zombies had to show up… also you and your friends lit up most of the members and the others… well you can probably guess what happened to them.” I thought for a second, “What’s stopping us from rebuilding it? I mean we can head to the dead zone, which is in need of leadership anyway, and start recruiting people and drones.” Kerr snickered, “Well if we even survive this bunker…” Luther was seemingly able to comprehend what we were saying, “I could be security…” he said off handedly. “I probably won’t join you though, I’m already a member of a faction in the zone.” I lowered the neck of my shirt to reveal a tattoo on my shoulder, two sideways Vs intersecting each other. “Well, it never hurts to have an ally… especially with the Invisibilia.” The sound of banging on the door was heard, considering the somewhat frantic banging along with the smell of gasoline it’s probably Uzi and N. “Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the enhancements that came with the software corruption… I can alter the perception of reality to an extent.” I got up and started to bend reality just a bit, and slung my AK over my shoulder with a tire iron in my right hand. They gave me good luck or rather, the illusion of Morris good luck.
This will probably be a good test to see if those undead feel fear, or have some semblance of their old selves in there. My intuition of N and Uzi being at the door was right, and I try to hit them through the crack of the door. After getting them off I use my schizophrenia giving powers to their fullest extent, I alert V of my presence but that is subsided by the hesitation to come close. Apparently they do feel fear from me, now let’s see if they have memories. “What’s wrong N? Couldn’t deal with having to fight your girlfriends? You’re almost as pathetic as Nori… correction moreso, you just had to steal the kill from me.” This of course sends Uzi into what I can only describe as shock, so that answers that. Either way I turn all of them into slices of swiss cheese, however the bunker is still full and the others opt to leave the injured drone behind as their practically dead weight… no matter, for the dead won’t stay down for long and we have to keep moving. I stare in disgust at Uzi, a painful reminder of my past… I would spit but drones physically cannot (unfortunately?). No matter, through the forest the three of us unturned go…
We make it through the forest, and into the dead zone. Thankfully I was not exiled, and rather went outside on a significant purpose (which I will not disclose as of current), and Kerr immediately runs off to go recruit the entirety of the refugees of the outside to Delta Company. She’s off and away, then me and Luther are left to our own devices… Luther goes and wanders off, possibly to get drunk on coolant though I wouldn’t judge him for doing so. [Morris hosting restored] I walk over to one of the Invisibilia hideouts in order to communicate all the shit that went down within the past week, and considering I think in English I’ll transcribe the conversation afterward in English; “Hey P4! Why the hell didn’t you kill the admin while you had the chance?” said a Russian colleague of mine, “I have a name you know… also that fucking bitch would probably have gotten the upper hand, that surprise you fleshbag?” did I just call him a slur for human? Yes, yes I did, but we’re actually on good terms so the insult is very lighthearted, “Yeah Morris I know, you also brought a fascist clanker over here… hope to god they aren’t in a ‘Kill all humans and native drones’ phase”, so yeah we basically shit talked each other. Pretty good considering Copper-9’s only safe space is a dead zone which was more devastating than Chernobyl, but hey that’s better than turning into a zombie right?

This why I was never really mad at Steffy coming for her ass because I knew Hope would show true colors later down the road. Now all of sudden she on the sheila redemption train after she was so ugly and hateful to her father not long ago about if he didnt leave sheila, he could not be in her life but now she wants to be sheila's cheerleader because Finn is ok with her. She fake, fake, fake, fake. She lowkey wants finn. She agrees with everything he says and never really questions it. She even had the nerve to compare Sheila to Thomas because Finn did when she use to drag everybody and their momma to filth for coming at Thomas even told her father that Thomas was nothing like sheila so do not compare them. She is doing all this because she lowkey wants to bang Finn. Her logan era is coming. Atleast brooke owned her whorish ways. Hope tries to disguise hers behind this so call good girl image that she tries to keep holding onto and needs to let go. Your hope for the future image left long time ago, girlfriend.

His ex sent me this message. Sorry it’s so long! Has anybody else gotten a similar message in the past? How did you react?
Message below: “It’s been over a year of me wondering whether I should just come out and ask you or message you… but being afraid that if I do, and I’m wrong, it’ll be a the biggest mistake of my life. I have begged and begged him to tell me what you are to him, and he denies having anything more than a platonic friendship with you.
I want to preface this message with, I have no ill will towards you, I just want some answers… answers I don’t believe I’m going to get from Jared. I don’t know if he’s mentioned anything about me. So here goes…
November 2022, I sent Jared an email, telling him I loved him, missed him, and though I didn’t require a response back, I wanted him to know how sorry I was for everything that had happened and things had ended. He responded with a lengthy email telling me he still fervently loved me and how he too was sorry for how things had ended. That email lead to the last year and a half of events.
December 2022, I drove down to Roanoke and surprised him at the Carilion garage. He left the hospital as fast as he could that night, and we spent the rest of that evening together, catching up, and he left for Key West two days later. Two weeks later, he came up to DC and we had a late birthday celebration for him at Clyde’s in Georgetown and went to see A Christmas Carol at the Ford Theater. A few weeks later we drove to Jersey to see Matchbox20, by now it was the end of January 2023. Almost every week off, for the last year, he would come up and see me, if even for only two days, or I would drive down to Roanoke and spend the week with him. We spoke about our past, the hurt, and future, he told me numerous times that when he pictured marriage and children, it was only with me, but he needed time. This part is important, and I’ll come back to it later. We celebrated my birthday at a restaurant in Navy Yard, two weeks before you guys left for London. Chris video chatted with that night while we were at the restaurant eating Wagyu, and they discussed the new shipment of sunglasses Chris had gotten for Miggieswear.
The weekend of the Super Bowl, he had come seen me earlier that week, the day after he left I came to Roanoke and left the day of the Super Bowl. He told me his parents were having a viewing party and he had to go home and cook. I’m now assuming he left my Airbnb and came to your place.
That February he planned a trip to London, with Nicole, Ryan and Chris, and what he told me were, Nicole’s “friends.” Nicole happened to post a picture of you guys sitting on the plane and I was shocked, why would Nicole’s friend be sitting between him and Ryan. I sent him a message while you were on that 6 hour flight, telling him that if he had been seeing somebody, then why didn’t he tell me? There was no point in us spending time together if he had moved on. His response to me was “do you even know what you’re looking at? I’m surprised you don’t recognize her, that’s Nicole’s friend. You’re jumping to a lot of conclusions right now and don’t know what you’re talking about.” Something in my gut didn’t believe it but I wanted to trust that, so I did. I put you out of sight, out of mind. When he got back, he told me how he wished I’d been there with him, we both love history and old buildings, it’s a place we would have found magical together. I don’t know who came up with the idea of going to London, but part of me always thinks I’m the one who put it there when I shared the pictures i had taken when I went there the year we had been no contact.
We went to a Kenny Chesney concert in Charlottesville that March when I got back from my family trip to India, and he got back from London. Between work, us both traveling with our families, we were excited to see one another. We were going to go to St Augustine, but because of the weather, we stayed in Roanoke and saw Kenny Chesney in Charlottesville. The original plan had been to spend the night in Charlottesville at a hotel, but we couldn’t get one last minute so we ended up driving back to Roanoke and sneaking into the basement at his parents house and sleeping in his bed at 3am.
A few months later, we went to Richmond, and stayed the weekend, exploring the city, and watched Hamilton at the Altria Theater. A few months after that, we went to Savannah and Atlanta, where he got a flat tire driving into the garage, and spent the rest of the weekend at a yoga retreat. July, he asked me to go to Boston with him and his brother, for 4th or July weekend, but I couldn’t because my siblings were in town. Every single week, he came down and either stayed with me, or made a quick trip to spend time with me…
This past September, I found out he took you to Justin’s wedding, and I broke. I needed more from him. I have known him, been intimate with him, shared my every fear, worry, I have brought him home cooked meals from DC and surprised him at work with dinner, I’ve made him care packages. I’ve made Ryan Easter baskets and sent him birthday presents and encouraged Jared to put him in academic classes, I’ve helped Jared look into private schools for Ryan, and weighed the pros and cons of the options. I had no expectations in return from him other than, at the very least, a mutual respect and HONESTY.
I’ve seen him quite a few times since September and I last saw him in Roanoke at the beginning of March 2024. We sat in front of each other, in his car before he went into work that Monday night, and he told me, again, that when he thinks of marriage and a future, I’m the only one he pictures a marriage and children with. I’m not saying this to hurt you, or to make a point, I’m saying it because i don’t know what to believe anymore.
I became suspicious of his relationship with you, when he mentioned going to Macchu Picchu and hiking through the mountains. As all women have the ability to find out details they might later regret, I did the same thing. Except I didn’t believe he had actually gone to Macchu Picchu. I knew his passport had been long expired since around or before COVID, and I knew he had renewed it before he went to London. But that was when I realized you were the girl in the photo that Nicole posted. When I confronted him about Macchu Picchu, he told me he had been joking and he had also already told me he’d been joking. He had NEVER told me it was a joke, he had actually refused to show me photos when I asked him for pictures from the trip… he had then proceeded to change the topic, which is what had even raised red flags in my head.
My point is, I have asked him point blank so many times whether you two have a relationship. You tell me you still love me, that you picture marriage and a family with me, but this girl is a part of your life, and you took her to a wedding with you, while I was on a trip with my siblings, you took her to London with you, and you continue to tell me she’s just a friend. I asked him again on Tuesday night/Wednesday Morning after he left work, if you two are dating, and he said no. He asked me why I’m so hyper-fixated on somebody who’s just a friend when he has a million other female friends.
In September, he told me he needed a month to clear his head, that he wanted to commit to me, but he was afraid and that he needed to get over the fear and roadblock of our past break up. I gave him grace and understood. So we took a 4 week break. Some time during that time period, he sent me a snap of doves, and said “doves, and swans mate for life.” He sent me Ed Sheeran songs telling me he wants to find his way back to me. “No Strings Attached… you are the one I love”
In November, he messaged me and told me he had a surprise for me and to look for something in the mail. He loves the Count of Monte Carlo, it’s one of his favorite movies, and he told me it was in reference to that. A few weeks later I got a candle, a silver 400 dollar Buddha candle from Thomson Ferrier. I didn’t understand the reference to the Count of Monte Carlo, but it was a beautiful gesture and present… especially because he knew how much little gestures from him mean to me.
Fast forward to January, I got another 350 dollar black skull candle from him, from Thomson Ferrier. At this point I was upset, angry and livid. I called my sister in tears that evening. I had come back to him because he told me he loved me, that he “has a fire that burns so deeply” when he thinks of me. If i had known that wasn’t true, i would have closed the chapter a year and a half ago. I don’t want $700 worth of gifts and candles, I want more. I want marriage, I want children, I want our lives to move forward, I want communication. Out of anger, I packed up the candle, his sweatshirts and clothes that he had left at my place this past year, and mailed them back to his house. I’m sure it’s sitting somewhere in his basement closet/ bedroom… along with his white Huq sweatshirt, a picture of us I had up in my house, and various articles of clothing.
What upsets me is that he didn’t just involve me this year, he involved my family. He sent my mom presents, my parents in return sent him gifts. My sister, parents and cousins messaged him asking him to come around more. There was no point in involving my family, if he was going to involve himself with you. There was no point in involving himself with me, if he was going to involve himself with you. Those leather Indian shoes sitting in his room, my dad bought those for him. That blue sweater, those green pants and that maroon shirt, my parents bought those for him just this last year.
I don’t know what he’s told you about me, but I will say this. I was your age when we started dating. I was 29 years old. He was single, that’s what everyone in our residency program thought. He would tell everyone how Shari left him one day, all of a sudden just got up and left. “I saw the look behind her eyes just change when she looked at me.” He would tell everyone his horrific dating stories. When i started dating him, there was no doubt in my mind he was single… but I was wrong. He wasn’t single, he was dating Devon, one of the nurses from Carilion, and he had been for the past 4 years prior to that. At one point when he moved to Norfolk, she had even moved in with him. Even Shari was visiting him in Norfolk during this time period. I would have never suspected it, nobody in our residency program did. It wasn’t until one day, when he told me his friends were visiting from home, and they were all going to a concert together, that I found out. Her profile picture was of the two of them together, and her Facebook relationship status said “in a relationship.” Out of my own naivety, i believed him when he told me she was crazy and obsessed with him. He told me, to him, they were just friends but she wanted more. Women do a lot of things, but no woman is dumb enough to think she’s your girlfriend when she’s not. When we moved back to our hometowns, Devon was there waiting for him. He disappeared one day for 24 hours, told me that he was helping his dad’s friend who was stranded in NC. A year and a half later, i would find out that was a lie and that he had been at a concert Florida Georgia Line concert with her. She had been visiting his grandmother with him, staying at his parents home. The irony is that a few weeks after he took her, he took me to the same concert in Scranton. Him and his family didn’t bat an eye when a month later, I showed up and was the “new girlfriend.”
Eventually Devon found out about his lies and left him, but again, stupid me thought she was a crazy girl who just wanted so badly to be with him, that she built their relationship up in her head.
Dignity, respect for humans, empathy, are the most important qualities in a human being.
What I don’t wish is for you to be in my spot in 5 years. He will paint you in his colors, make you fall in love with MB20, and take you to Augustana concerts, he’ll tell you that you understand him, and his heart in a way that nobody else does. He’ll bond with you over music, and send you songs that make you feel he’s talking about you. He is so good at making you feel seen, and involving you with his family. He’ll say he had a vision of a girl that looks like you, coming into his life, and here you are, his soul mate. And one day, the same way that Shari, Devon and I got lost in him, the reality of everything will come pouring down on you. Be careful, there are signs between the lines, and the smiles, and good times. Make sure you don’t miss those, whatever you decide.
My relationship with him, started off just like yours. Another girl on the periphery, and teetering the line of inappropriate. Everything you call him out on, will always have an excuse, and you will believe him because he’s the “good guy” who goes above and beyond for people.
I don’t wish for any woman to go through the pain I’ve gone through, the manipulation, the lies and the emotional abuse. I can’t tell you what to do, but I will say, be careful and don’t be blind to the small things that will one day become huge. The novelty will fade, and though Jared isn’t the devil, he has a lot of growing up to do at 40. It was not okay to toy with me and drag me through the mud this year. It wasn’t okay to minimize his relationship with you and lie to me about it. It’s not okay to, to this day claim to see a life with me and not commit to it. I deserve better, and you deserve better.
How men talk about their ex’s and other women is an indication about how they will one day talk about and treat you. That is the worst and best lesson i have learned. I’m 34, years of my life wasted, and he took another year of my life knowing full well, this is how it would end. He’s sat on the phone with me for hours talking about how stupid PA’s are and if you were going to not be a doctor, at least become an NP, who has better bedside knowledge. Why would he say that, because i suppose you’re a PA and it minimizes the significance of even having a relationship with somebody who isn’t as intelligent as he is. The lack of respect will always be there, you just have to look for it.
Dishonesty, and manipulation are a plague, and if that’s who you are at 40, it is who you will always be unless you recognize that something needs to change. Where there is no accountability, there can be no change. I’m not the exception, I’m the same as the two girls before me. He’ll show you text messages where he never responded to me, even though he replies on Snapchat where every thing is erased. I cannot believe i didn’t see the signs. He will make me look crazy and laugh at me, the same way he showed me messages from Jen, and Elisabeth, and Devon, and made them sound crazy to me. I guess that’s his MO. The same way he told me you were nothing to him.
I was going to send you this message, two months ago… i then decided not to because he convinced me he wasn’t dating you… I saw him less than a month ago in Roanoke, i begged him to tell me that he was in a relationship with you. He said he wasn’t, again, he told me he was going to a wedding alone with only Ryan and that he wasn’t taking you. I then begged him to tell me that we were done and that he didn’t love me anymore. His response was idk what’s going to happen a year from now, i know I’ll see you again. His response every time has been when im ready for a relationship, emotionally, do you want me to finally let you know? I don’t care to be with him anymore. I’m so over it but i really think you should know the type of person you’re dealing with.
He has put me through so much hell for a year and a half of my life, stringing me along acting like he’s doing me a favor while he works on his own mental health and claims to still love me when we are together.”
TLDR: my SO’s ex messaged me saying he’s been seeing both of us for the past year and a half. Has anybody experienced this before. She sent me pictures from the past year of them and their text exchanges

My son is 8 weeks, and last weeks we went to visit the town my dad currently lives in. We did not see him, nor did I let him meet my son, at all on the duration of the trip.
For better context: growing up my dad was in prison for almost 20 years, released a few years ago, so he missed my entire childrearing days. And after he got out, he kind of expected me to respect his authority as my father, despite us never having that type of relationship ever. And we have clashed about his overstepping ever since, in addition to me learning about him cheating on my step mom (whom he cheated on my mom with when I was an infant and had 3 children with over the years).
He moved away from the area and reside with his current girlfriend, of which he had a child with (result of the affair). I had already told him in the past that if he cheats on his wife, or neglects my other sisters, that I would have to sever our relationship. And I would have removed myself already because I don’t really care for him or the drama he causes, had it not been for my family. And I was generous in giving him chances before I ultimately blocked him on everything.
When I went into labor, I didn’t tell my dad and actually forbade other people from telling him as well. The only reason he found out was because a relative spilled the beans. Even then, he contacted my mom to express how upset he was.
And when I was in the town that he currently lives in, I strictly told everyone I was visiting not to tell my dad. And of course word got out to him that I was there. And I still didn’t see him, despite my family pressuring me to. And once again, he reached out to my mom to express his grievances.
But I don’t see him as a positive influence in my life, much less my sons, given his past and current actions/behavior. I had even sent him an invite to my baby shower and he didn’t show up or send a gift. With no notice to me. He barely sees his other kids that live in the same town as I do, but he seems hyper focused to meet my son because he’s the first boy (my dad only had girls). He’s even referred to my son as “his boy.”
I’m tempted to contact him again finally and let him know my feelings and decision, so he can stop pestering my m and other relatives, who pester me. While I tried going the route of “needs no explanation,” it’s not working in my favor and it’s frankly getting on my nerves.
But just wanted some advice as to how to navigate the conversation, or if I even should.

trigger warning for: suicide and sexual assault mentioned
i(20F) and my friend(18F) have been friends for almost two years. i consider her my best friend. she’s been on and off with this guy(18M) since before we were friends, and he’s a complete asshole to her. he’s manipulative, toxic, narcissistic, and has even done stuff to her without her consent. overall, this guy is bad news.
recently, he broke it off with her and said it was for good, and blocked her. she attempted to overdose, called me, and i drove her to the emergency room and stayed by her side the whole time. she was discharged without being sent to a mental hospital, and i would try to check up on her everyday. this got very overwhelming for me, as i have PTSD from my own suicide attempt and it’s been triggering me. i’ve been having nightmares every night, and it seems it’s triggered a mental breakdown of my own.
she keeps trying to reach him through ways he doesn’t realize she’s not blocked on, then he says something mean and blocks her. she still defends him 100%, and through conversations with her she told me she’s never planning to move on and would rather die than be with him. i’ve done my everything to support her and be there for her, i’ve thrown my mental health in the trash to be there for her(i realize it’s bad).
recently, she found out that her ex found a new girl(not even a week after her attempt) and she told me that she was going to take every pill possible in her cabinet that night when everyone went to bed. i asked her multiple times if she was joking, if it was only a thought, but she said she was one hundred percent sure she was going to attempt and die that night. i asked if she was willing to come to my house, and she agreed.
as she drove over to my house, i called 911 and had police and an ambulance come to my house to do an intervention. she went to the emergency room, i went with her, and she was sent to a mental hospital where she’s been for around a week.
her mom was upset that i called 911, and i soon found out that she had lied to her mom about what she had told me. she told her mom that i had tricked her, that she just was having thoughts and wanted to talk, but i was sending her away against her will. i quickly showed her mom the texts she had sent, proving that this was much more serious.
i was like, okay, maybe in the moment she was just scared of her mom finding out and i got thrown under the bus, i can live with that. but i found out that her friends were calling my dad and i weird for calling 911. she had asked me to update one of her friends for her, and i did, he told me that she said she wasn’t going to do anything. i clarified again, explaining i was 100% sure she would be dead if nothing was done. she also posted on reddit, saying that “she didn’t even do anything” etc.
in the hospital she said she thought everyone was overreacting and was just annoyed. meanwhile i just cried my eyes out for thirty minutes because of PTSD and stress.
to everyone else she’s making it seem like i just wanted her to be sent away and she didn’t do or say ANYTHING that warranted this to happen. either she’s lying to me, or she’s lying to everyone else.
i feel hurt and betrayed, after all this she tells me i overreacted and made me out to be the bad guy to everyone.
i plan to talk to her when she gets out about what had happened and how i feel, but im not sure what to even think about this all.

I finally published for the first time. Not the first time I've finished a novel, but certainly the first time I have actively published one .. one that I've been a little proud of. I know it's a long process to get noticed, or even start to see some traction in sales & downloads, but how do you go about promoting your novel? I feel like I'm stuck. 😕
Beginning of chapter one below - if anyone would like to provide feedback that would be lovely. 🙂
[2,310] It began like a surreal haze, a fever dream dancing with unknown figures swirling around her like a languid tornado, their movements seemingly slowed by some unseen force as she awoke to a world spinning out of her control. She found herself surrounded by strangers who moved like spectres in a dream, fragmented flashes who assaulted her consciousness - a woman gently pressing a cloth to her throbbing head, another offering sips of water while she coughed and struggled to swallow, a man peering down at her with a furrowed brow, and a mysterious figure lingering in the doorway with an unsettling glint of desire in his eyes.
The room buzzed with a quiet urgency as they hovered around her, their faces etched with concern and something else she couldn't quite place - an undercurrent of tension that seemed to pulse in time with her own racing heart. These disjointed images flitted in and out, creating a mosaic of fragmented reality. Awake, her body throbbed with pain; asleep, she plunged into a black abyss, time slipping away unnoticed. Each awakening brought the desire for oblivion as her mind plunged back into the depths of darkness.
Beth jolted upright, startled by the sharp bang of a car backfiring. A cry of pain escaped her lips as she attempted to sit up, her back and legs resisting her will. A woman, the same from her fleeting visions, hurried into the room with a damp cloth and a glass of water.
"Easy now," the woman spoke gently, her mild Spanish accent adding warmth to her sharp words as she pressed the cloth to Beth's forehead and helped her sit up, "you're weak, rushing won't do you any favours. The sooner you regain strength, the sooner you can move."
A man, the one with the odd expression in her visions, appeared in the doorway once again; "and the sooner we can leave this place, I'm sick of it." He grumbled, striding away with urgency and frustration. His steps were heavy and fraught with agitation, each one seeming to leave a deep imprint on the ground beneath him. His grumbling was like distant thunder, punctuated by the clenching of his jaw and the tightening of his fists.
"Don't mind my brother," the woman interjected sharply, "it's not you - he hates everyone." Hate, Beth pondered, wondering what she might have done to earn his disdain.
"Are you hungry?" The woman stood, walking to the other side of the room to adjust another pillow behind Beth's back. Beth nodded; "I'll get you some soup."
Left alone, Beth surveyed the room - beige walls, a shattered TV, torn brown curtains. She squinted at the notepad on the side table, revealing the branding - Mill Village Motel Eatonville. The coffee pod machine at the room's far end, covered in dust, hinted at a neglected past.
"You're awake," startled, Beth turned to find the man with the furrowed brow at the door - tall and dark, with piercing brown eyes, he appeared softer now, "how are you feeling?" Beth managed a brief smile before adjusting herself, wincing in pain. He rushed to offer a hand, and she took his arm to shift as he adjusted the pillow.
"Want to give walking a try?" The man's warm, brown eyes crinkled at the edges as he smiled down at her, his features etched with concern, his furrowed brow now smooth and his brown eyes sparkled with an unfamiliar kindness.
She shook her head, and the woman returned with soup and water; "she needs to eat before attempting to walk, Austin," she said, setting the tray before Beth.
"Then we'll try again tomorrow," Austin expressed, heading towards the door, "the sooner we leave, the better - we've been here for too long." His footsteps echoed with determination and authority, less frustrated than the other man's but equally resolute.
"I apologise if it's cold. Heating options are limited here. Need a hand?" The woman offered. Beth shook her head, the pounding of her headache resonating through her body.
"Well I'll leave you to it then. Shout out if you need anything, if you can talk at all." Beth glanced down at her bowl of soup, parting her lips as if to speak, but no words escaped. A deep sigh escaped from the woman's mouth as she turned and left the room, leaving Beth alone with her cold, untouched meal. The silence in the room was deafening, broken only by the sound of muffed chatter outside.
The days stretched longer as Beth's need for rest diminished. Boredom and confusion settled in, intensifying as the people from her visions became tangible presences, moving in and out of her room. They attended to her needs but seldom engaged in conversation. At night, their muffled voices in the adjoining room became a distant comfort, and the faint echoes of their arguments a source of intrigue.
"We need to leave," a frustrated male voice pierced through the thin walls, "we have to head further south before winter traps us with little supplies and an extra mouth to feed - considering you're all so intent on keeping this girl alive."
"This woman," a familiar female voice retorted, likely the one who had been caring for her, "needed help - I distinctly remember a time when I wasn't doing well and needed it too."
"You're my sister, of course, I wasn't going to leave you behind."
"I'm not talking about you, Luis," she yelled, "I'm talking about before you came back from Minnesota and found me."
"Why can't we just leave her here with some supplies and a gun. Why do we need to bring her with us?"
"Jesus Christ Luis we're not leaving her here alone and you two can have it out later," intervened another man, "but Luis is right - we need to leave before the snow settles in."
The argument faded into muffled voices again, and Beth strained to catch the words exchanged between the trio. A knock at the door startled her.
"May I come in?" A young girl, the same from her visions, had opened the door quietly without her even noticing. "I thought the yelling might have woken you." Beth nodded, maintaining her silence.
"I'm Chantelle." Her soft Southern accent flowed like a gentle breeze through a cornfield. She pulled up a chair beside the bed. "Luis can get into it with everybody, but he means well. Well, no, that's a lie. I don't know why I said that. He's a dick."
"I gathered," Beth whispered and laughed a little, suddenly overtaken by a violent cough.
Chantelle rushed to hand her water; "so, you do speak. From the way Austin and Val were sayin' it, it sounded like you were mute. I thought, you couldn't be deaf because you've been nodding and smiling like a dang puppet."
Beth laughed and took another sip; "I didn't really have anything worth saying until now. No one has bothered to make conversation."
"Your accent, where are you from?" Chantelle sat down on the wooden chair, her long dark hair cascading down her back in gentle curls. Her bright brown eyes sparkled with kindness as she looked towards Beth.
"Australia," Beth paused, realising she hadn't thought about home for a while, "I'm from Australia," she repeated.
Chantelle pulled out a deck of cards; "well, I figured you might be bored and needed a little human interaction that didn't make you feel like you were in a hospital."
Beth's eyes lit up, and Chantelle smiled; "what do you want to play?"
— — —
"What do you think you are doing?" Austin stormed into the motel room.
"We're leaving. Today," Luis' words cut through the air.
"The van's still in bad shape, and we won't survive this winter on foot." Austin's arms were folded tightly across his chest, the muscles in his biceps and forearms bulging with tension. His jaw was clenched, and his brows furrowed in frustration.
"Then fix the damn van!" Luis yelled, the sound piercing through the walls and resonating outside the motel room for others to hear the heated exchange.
"Oh, sorry, I'll just take it down the road to the mechanic, shall I?" Austin raised a quizzical eyebrow, smirking at his friend. The men paused their argument, exchanging laughter.
"Luis, what's going on with you?" Austin softened his tone, taking a seat on the other bed. "We've been friends since high school, grew up together, served in the army together. This isn't you."
"I don't know, man." Luis sat on the other bed, facing his friend, his face buried in his hands. He rubbed his face hard, threw his head back, and sighed heavily. "This just isn't—" he paused.
"Isn't what?"
"Isn't life." Luis gestured around the room.
"We'll get to the coast, find a boat, just like we planned." There was a slight taste of bitterness in the air, as if Austin's mild frustration was tangible.
"And then what?"
"Do the best we can," Austin stood up, placing a hand on his friend's shoulder, "we all have our dark moments, brother. You helped me get through mine, I'll help you get through yours."
Austin walked out of the motel room into the crisp morning air. The atmosphere was fresh, with a subtle scent of dew and grass. The sweet aroma of winter's imminent arrival filled the air, mingling with the faint scent of burning oil from their broken down van across the parking lot.
"Ben thinks he can fix the van by tomorrow. He found the parts we need on the other side of town." Val caught Austin as he had walked outside.
"He went scouting alone?" Austin looked across the lot at Ben, deep into the hood of the black church van they had found a while back.
Chantelle bounded up before she could answer; "Beth seems much better today. She's eatin' and drinkin' more. I think she could try walkin' today."
"Beth?" Val and Austin remarked in unison.
"Mmm, she speaks - she might have a lot more to say if either of you bothered to converse with her instead of just talkin' to her." She walked off towards Ben, a light air in her hopeful stride.
— — —
Austin found Beth sitting on the edge of her bed, her feet bare and dangling idly over the side. Her toes were curled, squeezing them tightly as she wiggled them back and forth. Her face was tense with concentration as she tried to alleviate the tingling sensation in her feet.
"Beth." His voice was soothing and calming, his words spoken with a gentle tone as he tried to ease Beth's discomfort.
"Chantelle?" She looked up at him, as he nodded, smiling gently. "She's a good kid." She smiled and looked back at her toes.
"Do you want to try walking today?" He walked towards the chair on the other side of the room and sat down as it creaked underneath the weight of him.
"The sooner I can walk, the sooner you can get out of here." She said with a sarcastic air, mocking Luis.
"The sooner we can get out of here." He repeated sarcastically with a smile, a light spread of jest washing over him as he joined her in mocking his friend.
"Your friend Luis seems to be very against bringing me along with you." She looked back at him.
"I'm not in the business of leaving people behind. Especially in Washington in the middle of October," he sat forward, leaning his elbows on his knees, "you wouldn't survive the winter."
"Then maybe you should have just left me to die." She turned her body to face him abruptly. He opened his mouth to speak, but she interjected before he could respond.
"Why did you help me? You don't know me, why did you even bother?"
"Like I said, Beth," he stood up, his wistful tone switching back to cold and dry, "I'm not in the business of leaving people behind." He walked over to her slowly.
"I've lost too many people. I've watched people kill others over a can of soup. I've seen friends leave friends behind to save themselves," he sat down on the end of her bed, "I don't leave people behind."
His brown eyes cut through his words like a thunderstorm. She looked at his face, tired and weathered from sleepless nights with one eye open to ensure his group's safety. She pegged him as their leader - strong and determined with clear military training.
"What happened to you?" She asked softly.
"What happened to you?" He countered; "I refuse to believe you survived a pandemic alone for six months in a foreign country."
She said nothing and looked back at her feet. They sat in silence for a while before he stood up and headed for the door.
"We're leaving the day after tomorrow. We need to head south before it's too cold, and we don't know how long the van or the car will last, so part of that might be on foot."
"I'll try walking today." Beth nodded obediently.
"I'll send Val and Chantelle in to help you." He replied, his voice maintaining the cold cadency.
"Thank you." She smiled, wriggling her toes as the numbness started to dissipate. Before he could leave, she looked up at him again.
"Austin?" He stopped at the door and turned to her. "I know you've all done a lot for me, including putting your friendship with Luis on the line, so thank you. But I have a favour to ask," her voice grew quiet, "before we leave."
"What is it?" He asked sternly at her audacity to ask for another favour.
She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. He noticed her green eyes glisten with the added layer of acridity and the change in her demeanour; "before we leave, I need you to help me bury my husband."

So I have no work the rest of the week and there’s no more vids coming out… I’m thinking of maybe wasting some time and finding out the average views per video for each channel this year… let me know if you guys would be interested in that.
Smosh (26.6 million subscribers):

1. Submissive & Breedable ft. bbno$ (Official Music Video) - 2,300,738 views
2. Pokémon In Real Life 2024 - 1,646,802 views
3. MrBeast Copycats Have Gone Too Far - 1,211,534 views

No other video has reached 1 million views.
Smosh Cast (528 thousand subscribers):

1. We’re Married Smosh Mouth 44 (ft. Courtney) - 2,666,351 views
2. The Tell All Episode Smosh Mouth 40 (ft. Chanse and Angela) - 869,120 views
3. Try Not To Laugh: The Podcast: The Rematch Smosh Mouth 29 (ft. Angela) - 717,983 views

They also have three shows from last year which have more views than the April Fools cast - Bad 2 Sentence Horror Stories (ft. Damien), Spent an hour with Anthony (ft. Anthony, duh) and Creepypasta (ft. nobody). The first two have clocked over 1 million.
Smosh Pit (8.17 million subscribers):

1. Can I Guess Who Slapped Me? (Anthony) - 1,984,024 views
2. The Worst Of The Worst Reading Reddit Stories (Courtney and Spencer) - 1,826,948 views
3. You Won’t See This Coming! Reading Reddit Stories (Courtney and Trevor) - 1,733,329 views

22 total videos with 1 million views - 17 of these are unsurprisingly Reddit Stories, with the most recent one well on its way. The others are Anthony’s Slap, Who Meme’d It (Cowboy Shayne), Final Eat It Or Yeet It and two TNTL’s.
Smosh Games (7.66 million subscribers):

1. Trivial Pursuit: Try Not To Laugh #7 (Shayne and Courtney) - 1,258,878 views
2. Darts Ultimate Showdown - 1,248,307 views
3. SMOSH DATING SHOW?? - 1,217,786 views

Unlucky to just miss out! The Shayne Guesses compilation on the 30th of Dec has 1.9 million views! 11 total videos crossing 1 million, 2 of them are compilations of 2023 (Trivial Pursuit and Moose Master). Of the remaining 9 we have 8 completely different games - the only repeater being Ultimate Werewolf.
There have also been 11 streams this year (9 on Games, 1 on Pit, 1 on Main)

1. Try Not To Laugh Theater LIVE (Pit) - 638,802 views
2. Wrong Answer = DONATE BEOPARDY CHARITY STREAM (Games) - 541,642 views
3. The Ultimate Staring Contest (Games) - 490,916 views

Hope ya’ll enjoyed.