Sayings about bedtime

So hello everyone. I chose to join this community because I really need people to reach out with 😭
sorry if thus makes no sense logically in the way I write, I’m kinda burnt out and just had to write a really stressful essay so my brain is completelyfried ☠️
tw: physical and mental abuse, SH, possible SA
since I was about 6-7, I moved into a new home. My mom sort of restarted herself, joining social medias and such, reaching out to friends. My dad just… is my dad. The stereotypical homophobic guy you read about. iykyk. since then, my mom has basically believed everything she sees. At around 7 1/2, she established a 30 minute screen time rule. If I broke it, i’d be grounded for 2 weeks. Sometimes I’d sneak into their room and use it, but was often caught. i grew up in a family where talking about things I liked would criminalize me. So I didn’t. I learned To not talk, to not feel in front of them. To be a perfect little kid. I grew Up hiding pretty much everything I didn’t want them to see. the pretty basic ‘you can talk to me’, etc was constantly on me- lovebombing, then yelling, etc etc.
so far I have a couple undiagnosed mental issues my parents both refuse To akoknowlege- autism, adhd. I can TELL on everything I have some form of OCD. The only medical condition that is confirmed it Motor Tick. It’s annoying as hell. I’ll get into that later.
according to my mom, and my dad but specifically my mom, I am ‘too young’ to know if I should be evaluated for any of the things I’ve preciously listed. I suffer day to day with overstimulation and panic attacks. She refuses to even take notice. I recently got into NJHS and she made it very clear I had to join. It wasn’t even a choice anymore. I ended up very stressed, as always.
according to my mom, which, to her, I am nothing but a Cishet girl, I need to be ladylike. Formal, even for school, dresses and skirts only. Only because of my amazing friends and boyfriend have I managed to wear anything but. I’m very dysphoric and have pretty severe body issues. Because of this I often self harm, which is dangerous because I do competitive swim and soccer, so there is very little places to hide scars.
a lot of my life I’ve been manipulated, forced into beliefs I don’t believe in- my entire family is Christian and look down upon anyone who isn’t. I’m the entire opposite. This causes arguments, especially when my mom checks my phone.
on my phone my mom downloaded a parental service called bark. Parents on here, if any.
please, please, please please please please lPlease PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU NEVER GET THIS FOR YOUR CHILD. If you really want a tracker, use a different one, like life360 or something, only under 15-16 or so, PLEASE. Don’t. It’s ripped ALL of my privacy, all of my life. I cant talk to my only online friends- my strongest connections. My best friends. People I love like siblings. people who were more of a father to me than my own.
winding Back to Motor Tick. For me, it used to be a repetitive clearing of my throat, but now it’s a small twitch in my upper stomach. It makes me twitch like I’m jumping at something that surprises me, but only I little. It’s only noticeable in some cases. But my mom and dad? They always notice. I do it while eatign without thinking, and suddenly I’m getting yelled at for disrespecting them. all the time. riding my bike? My bike gets taken if I twitch, wether it be from Motor Tick or not. Everything gets taken. I’ve had my HOMEWORK confiscated and then yelled at by my teachers because they don’t believe me.
speaking of punishments. Some often include: pushing down stairs, not being allowed to sleep, no food until after bedtime (strictly not allowed to leave room after, not even for water.) I have to stock food in my room which is also very not allowed.
my doors aren’t allowed to be locked, not even when changing. (this is the SA part Following this) My dad sits outside the door when I shower , sometimes watching the curtain, sometimes watching ME. He sometimes, to rub it in, will make comments on my body. My weight fluctuates due to my instability in many factors, so I’m constantly dissed for my weight, wether it be under or over HIS beauty standard. His. My DAD.
honestly why I’m saying all this is because I’ve been gaslighted enough to still want my parents around, even though I want so bad to get out of here and cut them off. And I don’t know if this is abuse or not. Help, also thanks for reading!

https://youtu.be/DNY_Mq1O8us?si=JVf15givKlMZbznI
Bella is lying on her tummy in bed “reading” a bedtime story to her mom. As Bella recites the book in her own words, she turns the book so that Shanann can see the pics. Little Bella makes funny faces as she flips the pages. “She’s sad as we go night night. After we go night night, now we can go to school,” Bella says to her mom. I find this heartbreaking. Bella is improvising and using her own feelings to tell the story. By looking at the book’s illustrations, we can see that the little girl in the book isn’t even in bed and yet, Bella talks about the character being sad about going to bed. Poor Bella. Nearly 4 years old and made to take 3 hour naps, everyday. Most children that age don’t take naps very often and they certainly don’t go back to bed for the night just 3 hours after waking from a marathon afternoon nap. Despite Shanann’s claims that Babywise was the reason for her children’s unusual sleep schedule, I believe that the early bedtime was only successful because she used sleep aids. Bella gets distracted by something and says she wants to “touch this” but her mom makes her go back to the story. Essentially rushing her daughter to hurry and finish “reading.” Time spent with her children seemed to revolve around naps and bedtime. There was no organic interaction. Shanann rarely allowed the kids to drift off from the script she had in her head and especially when bedtime was waiting. Shanann was a stickler about their schedules and her “me time.” Just for clarity, story time is the only part of the bedtime routine that Shanann was involved in at this point in their lives. Chris had been tasked with these nightly duties for over a year now. But Bella, as we can see in the progression of Shanann’s videos and posts, had become "needy" for her mother's attention and would request that Shanann help her dress and comb her hair after showering. Shanann had been spending her time "working" while Chris fed dinner, showered, dressed, gave snacks and brushed teeth for both girls. Shanann would then step in and read Bella a bedtime story. Despite the image that seems to have a large population of the world believing Shanann was the "perfect mother," it was in fact only an image.

I feel like a jerk. My 19 mo old has loved his paci from the beginning. It took him a while to keep it in overnight but we turned into the parents who left like 5 pacis in his bed as soon as he could find them and pop them back in. We always talked about trying the Paci Fairy or a paci-in-a-Build-a-Bear when he turns 2, we still have some time.
Fast forward to last Saturday. I've been seeing a bunch of good things about the Frida weaning kit and it was on sale at the store so I figured, why not? If it works in a week that's great! He's gotten more reliant on it recently (he almost exclusively uses it for nap and bedtime but when he's teething he's also been wanting it) so I've been starting to dread the 2 year weaning goal we originally set thinking he'd be even more hooked by then.
First day sucked. He hasn't woken overnight since about 10 months old and he woke up a few times needing comfort, which I expected. Each day has gotten progressively worse and I've been feeling horrible for taking away his comfort object in place of a less enjoyable, weird pacifier. Now on day 6, after 3 hours of my normally suspiciously-happy toddler losing it over every minor inconvenience (which I get it, things have changed, I think he has another tooth coming in, he has lots of emotions, I comforted him through it but it's still not like him) I finally checked the Frida box and it specifically says "For weaning from orthodontic nipple only"... He's been using the kind that they have a picture with a red cross through it. He's not been using an orthodontic nipple at all, ever.
Did we just put him through almost a week of pointless frustration because that kit is specifically made for weaning from a different nipple? Should we keep trying the kit or cave and go back to the original 2 year goal? Has anyone else done this?

My daughter will be 3 in August. She’s shown all of the signs of potty readiness for the last 6 months or so. We were doing great with sitting on the potty a few times a day, reading potty stories, and singing potty songs. Then one day my husband and I were making dinner and she went into the bathroom, pulled down her diaper, and peed in the potty all by herself then called me over to show me. We were so excited that we clapped and cheered and told her how proud we were- then she started crying and got really really upset. We comforted her and that night before bedtime she asked “why did mama and dada laugh at me?”- it broke my heart. I explained that we were so excited and happy and proud, and we weren’t laughing at her. She worried about it for multiple nights. Now it’s been about 3 months and she hasn’t used the potty since, she said “it’s too loud” (meaning the clapping and cheering) even when we reassured her we wouldn’t make noise. She does ask for “privacy” and will close herself in the bathroom and go through the actions (sit on potty in her diaper, pull toilet paper and pretend wipe, flush toilet, wash hands)- we spied to learn what she was doing. But she won’t do this without a diaper or if we are around and says she doesn’t want to use the potty when we ask. We feel so terrible and learned a lesson about having more muted reactions with our sensitive girl. Any advice for how to move forward in any way? Do we just wait as she continues her private process? Anything we can do? We have a new baby coming in July, not sure to wait till after or try for before.

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A knock came at the door while Saphira was washing her hands in the basin.
“One moment!” she cried as she dried her hands on a nearby towel. She brushed her palms against her apron and made for the front door. Two familiar faces greeted her on the other side. “Espada! Goose! Come on in!”
Espada offered a curt nod and procured a bottle of dark wine from behind her back. “I know you’re avoiding the stuff, but Goose and I want to have a couple of glasses if you don’t mind.”
Saphira shook her head. “Not at all!”
“Thank you, thank you,” Goose sang as she skipped into Saphira’s home.
Saphira shut the door once they were all inside, then briskly returned to the kitchen, where two pots of stew cooked over her stove. She grabbed a mitten and cupped it over the knob beneath the pot, and pulled open the door. The fire was still going strong, so she nodded and shut it before setting the mitten back to the side.
“It smells delicious,” Espada said, taking a seat on the sofa.
“Thank you. It’s an old recipe of my grandmother’s. I hope you like it.”
“I’m sure it’s amazing.”
Saphira swung open a cabinet above her and plucked two glasses from within, holding them upside down with one hand. Years spent farming meant she had practiced hands, and she took great pride in her ability to accommodate friends and family. Grabbing a wine opener from a nearby drawer, thoughts of the last time she’d shared a glass with Matt pricked her tail. She strolled over to where Espada and Goose were sitting, cheerily humming as she gestured for the bottle of wine in Espada’s hand.
“It feels like it’s been forever since I’ve been here,” Espada commented, surrendering the bottle. “Keepin’ busy?”
“Every day is busy,” Saphira giggled as she set the glasses down. “Not that I mind it. I have excellent company.” She gestured to the crib against the back wall that Espada and Goose had built. Marie was happily playing with a few blocks that Goose had as a kitten. It baffled Saphira that Marie could already walk. Not that Marie could walk well just yet, but the fact that she’d picked it up so quickly and easily had Saphira wondering if she’d learned anything that early. “What about you?”
“Things are quiet lately, what with Matt and his Party gone. Demand for weapons and armor is low without ‘em. So I’ve been working the irrigation and home repairs lately.” Espada shrugged.
“Where’s Tabitha?” Saphira asked. Tabitha was a rambunctious woman, obsessed with dirt and everything beneath it. She had her heart set on being the one responsible for Junonia’s irrigation, and she worked as the village’s carpenter in her off time.
“We’re not sure, but she did mention checking out the other towns on Ni Island. Maybe she just got tired of this place.” Goose shrugged.
“It feels strange to take up her post,” Espada continued. “Not exactly my field of expertise. But it’s a living, and it’s oddly satisfying work. Besides, Goose is makin’ sure I don’t lose my touch.”
Saphira uncorked the bottle and set the opener to the side, blinking. “What does that mean?”
“It means you’re looking at a [Fighter],” Goose said with a toothy grin. “Been hearing all about Matt and his Party from Espada and the other girls, so I thought I’d make my own waves out there.” She emphasized the point by imitating an ocean’s current with her hands.
Saphira smiled. Ni Island wasn’t known for its plethora of adventurers. Most of them ended up calling it quits before Second Class—choosing quieter lives in tending to children, farming, cooking, or living off the land. She couldn’t think of the last time she heard of someone leaving Junonia. Well, except for Matt and his group. “Are you thinking of exploring outside the island?”
Goose shook her head. “Not yet. I’m thinking of hunting some small-time Encroachers for a few Bells. Espada’s been helping me.” She nudged Espada playfully.
Espada chuckled. “She has a good sword arm, so I’ve been teaching her in my off time.”
“Espada, you’re the best I’ve ever seen! You must’ve trained on Nyarlothep,” Goose said.
“Something like that.” Espada had always been tight-lipped about where she came from before she settled on Ni Island. Whenever she was asked, she’d shake her head and change the subject. If anyone pushed too hard, then she’d suggest they go on their way.
Saphira didn’t mind it so much, but she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t curious. Still, it wasn’t her place. She offered her own change of topic as she began to fill Espada and Goose’s glasses. “That’s so exciting, Goose!”
“It feels so good to train and Level. Don’t you think, Saphira?” Goose asked, leaning forward with eager eyes. She watched Saphira pour the wine, gripping the glass’ neck using her first two fingers and her thumb.
Saphira could hardly remember how long she’d dabbled in her Class after her choosing. Every catgirl selected a Class when they came of age, but it was a distant memory to her now. “A-ah… I admittedly don’t remember much.” She giggled and poured Espada’s drink next. “I know that I selected [Scout], though.”
“Huh. I would’ve figured you for a [Chemist] or a [Mage],” Goose said.
“I’d heard from Keke that [Scout]s were good at finding Encroacher parts, so I figured that I might become a leatherworker at some point,” Saphira said. She shook her head. “I’m not one for combat, though. I only ever reached Level 2.”
Goose nodded as she swirled her glass. “That’s our Saphira. Pure to the core.”
Saphira flushed and curled a lock of her hair around her finger. “Hardly.”
“You could charm the evil out of the Defiled,” Espada laughed before draining nearly half her glass.
Saphira wondered if Espada knew that wine was a bit different than ale. “That’s kind of you to say.” She could feel her cheeks growing hotter by the second. “I’m going to finish up dinner.”
By the time the food was ready to be served, Espada and Goose were laughing up a storm. Saphira set three hearty plates on the table, then strolled over to her daughter’s crib. Marie cooed and reached for Saphira’s finger, gripping it tight so as not to fall over.
“You’re so smart!” Saphira said in a high-pitched timbre. “It’s time for dinner!” She reached down and picked Marie up, cradling her in her arms as she approached the table in the living room. It was perfect for the occasion. She’d tried to share dinner with her daughter at the dinner table, but it had proven difficult with its height.
“Thank you for the meal,” Espada said with a nod. She’d finished her wine before dinner and didn’t seem any worse for wear. The same amount would’ve seen Saphira sleeping on the floor within minutes.
“Yeah, thanks!” Goose said.
“You’re welcome,” Saphira smiled as she took a seat across from Espada and Goose. Bouncing Marie on her knee, she plucked a fork from the table, skewered the steamed meozuna greens, and hovered the vegetable over Marie’s head. “Oh, look what I got you!” The kitten batted the air for her mother’s food, grabbing hold of Saphira’s wrist after the third attempt. Marie guided the fork to her mouth, nibbling on the soft veggie, and her tiny ears perked straight up. “Oh, what a good girl! Mommy’s little kitten is so smart!”
Goose and Espada watched with smiles on their faces as they picked at their food. Saphira continued to spoon and fork her food, sharing every other bite with Marie. To her relief, Marie was not a picky eater—Saphira’s mother had always liked to tease her about how fussy she was as a kitten.
“I can’t believe how fast she’s growing,” Goose commented while she wiped at her mouth with a handkerchief.
“I know, isn’t she beautiful?” Saphira glowed. “I love her with all of my heart and soul.” She and Marie touched foreheads, eliciting an excited coo from the kitten.
“It’s still so weird to me that Matt left,” Goose continued. “He’s such a…unique man.”
That was the perfect word for Matt. Saphira had never heard of a man traveling the other islands so quickly, nor had she ever heard of one working with the neighboring islands. It wasn’t unheard of, but she pined for Matt’s smile, his laugh, and his embrace. His presence brought so much hope and life to Junonia, and his absence was sorely felt.
Every day spent without him was another day Saphira spent worrying for his safety. As strong as he was, she feared that his kindness and consideration could bring him harm.
I hope you’re okay, Matt.
Espada snorted. “I can think of a few other words for him.”
Saphira guided another spoonful of potatoes into Marie’s mouth. “What do you mean?”
“We got off to a rough start.” She pushed her empty plate forward and leaned back against the sofa. “I was already pis—” She hesitated, glanced at Marie, then coughed into her fist. “I was in a bad mood that day. So I told him off when he tried to barter.”
Saphira gasped. “Espada!”
In a rare moment, Espada looked uncomfortable. “I work hard on my craft, and I wasn’t about to let him take advantage of me just because he was a man.”
“But they’re here to protect us.”
“I get that,” Espada said, her tone lowering, “I’ve just seen others who flaunt their influence, and I’m not okay with that.”
“I hope you apologized later.”
Espada blinked. “Sure. Yeah, I did.”
Saphira wasn’t quite sure if Espada was telling the truth, but she decided not to pry. “Well, it sounds like you’re on good terms now, then.”
Espada shrugged. “I think so. I gave him a few pointers when I had time.”
“You mean when it was convenient,” Goose jabbed Espada between the ribs playfully. “I know what those words really mean.”
Espada shook her head and rolled her eyes. “Sure you do.”
Marie grabbed one of Saphira’s bangs and pulled her closer. “Aauuooo?”
“Sweetie, you’re hurting Mommy,” Saphira said as she unhooked her daughter’s hand from her hair. She giggled and used her free hand to fix her hair. “You know, I’ve always wondered, Espada.”
“Hm?”
“What brought you to Ni Island? You know so much about weapons and armor, and you learn things so much faster than I would.” She tilted her head inquisitively. “Where did you learn?”
Espada didn’t answer immediately. “I used to work in Nyarlothep as a smith.”
“I knew it!” Goose cried.
A warning glance escaped the corner of Espada’s eyes. Goose quieted, and she continued, “I got tired of my work there and decided to come here instead.”
“A fresh start?”
“You could say that,” she said quickly. Her tone was flat and snappy. “I guess I just got tired of the politics and making weapons and armor for those who didn’t deserve them.”
“Well, I’m glad you decided to come to Ni Island,” Saphira smiled. This was a sensitive topic for Espada, that much she could tell. It was time to let the matter drop. What did it matter, anyway? “It wouldn’t be the same without you.”
Espada’s easy smile returned. “Thanks.”
The room was warm and comforting. As the conversation continued, Saphira eventually let Marie walk around under the condition that Goose sat on the floor with her. It was much easier to keep an eye on a curious kitten with multiple people. The three of them played with Marie, and when it was her bedtime, Saphira placed her daughter back in her crib and kissed her forehead.
“Thank you again for dinner,” Espada said. “It’s been a while since I had such a nice home-cooked meal.”
“You’re so welcome!” Saphira clapped her hands together. “We should do this again sometime.”
“I agree! Maybe next time I’ll bring the meat,” Goose said. “Fresh kill and all that.”
“As long as I don’t have to, well, prepare it.” Saphira swallowed hard. She couldn’t imagine being the one responsible for skinning and bisecting an Encroacher for food. She always left that to the butchers.
“Don’t worry. I could never ask you to do that.”
“Then it’s a plan!”
Espada and Goose waved their farewells, and Saphira shut the door behind them, leaning against its surface when they were gone. The room was quiet now, with only the crackling of the hearth and her daughter’s snores to keep her company. For a few moments, she couldn’t wipe the smile off of her face. She had the family she always dreamed of. Marie was every bit the blessing from Saoirse she imagined.
But the longer she stared, the longer she listened, the more empty the room started to feel. Her hands clenched into fists behind her, and her longing for Marie’s father heightened.
I wish you could see your daughter right now, Matt.
Espada Pro Tip: It was good to see you, Saphira. Don't be a stranger, okay? Let me know if your tools need maintenance.
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Hi! I moved out recently and finally adopted the kitten I’ve always wanted. He was about 6 weeks old when I adopted him (by their estimate), vaxxed and neutered. He’s a gray shorthair. I had cats growing up, but not kittens per se.
I love him to death but the biting/clawing is getting so annoying. He’s about 14 weeks old now and I sort of figured he would have grown out of this by now, based on things my family and friends with kittens/cats have told me.
He does this thing where he latches on to my foot with all his paws and just BITES. He does it while I’m walking, standing, sitting, trying to cook, etc. He’ll also bite any exposed skin… ears, nose, face, hands, back, doesn’t matter. He’s bit my scalp before. Sometimes it’s a gentle nibble, sometimes he actually draws blood and it really hurts. He does it at night as well, so I’ve resorted to keeping him in the bathroom at bedtime even though I really wanted him to sleep in my bed with me.
I feel like I’ve tried everything. Saying “ow!” loudly and pulling away does absolutely nothing, he just pounces back. He’s not startled by anything. He doesn’t understand “no,” obviously. I’ve tried ignoring him, walking away (just follows me), putting him in time out (in his crate), diverting him with a toy (he will play with the toy for a minute or two then go straight back to attacking my hands/feet instead). He gets played with plenty (several hours a day). He has tons of toys and chew toys. He will literally ignore toys mid play to bite me instead. He’s well fed. He’s literally jumped into the shower with me to chew on me. At nighttime I’ve tried playing with him before bed and feeding him to tire him out… doesn’t work. He might sleep for a few hours but at some point he will wake up and start biting me everywhere, no matter how much I ignore him or gently put him on the floor and say no, so he ends up going in the bathroom which makes me sad. My sister keeps telling me that her cat never behaved this way and says “he’s just a maniac sorry”.
Do I just wait for him to grow out of this or what?

I’m really worried about my husband and I parenting completely differently as our baby grows up.
We come from two different cultures - and he has never been around babies whereas I have 8 nieces and nephews I’ve always looked after. I do things like play white noise at bedtime, keep the room cool, blackout blinds and I also don’t leave her crying because she’s had digestive issues since birth where she’ll get really uncomfortable in her sleep and I would hate to just let her ‘cry it out’ when all she needs is comfort or a chance to burp.
So if my husband offers to go tend to the baby at night if she wakes up crying say at 10pm (through the night after midnight it’s always me as I sleep in her room and also he’s never woken up at night to help), he’ll try soothe her but if it goes beyond 10-15mins he gives up and asks me to intervene or leaves her in her crib crying. He says he just cannot handle the fussing or crying in his ear which I understand. As long as baby is safe I’d rather he puts her down than holding her while he’s angry. I feel so stuck, like he can say I give up or I’m not doing it anymore because he has that flexibility to, whereas I don’t. I’m not sure what to do?
He also will start saying ‘stop it now’ to her or swear or shout at me in front of her because of how stressed he gets with the crying.
Another things is he will try to do things that align with HIS comfort levels, so he’ll just go ahead and switch off the white noise as he finds it annoying, or switch off the AC, or he’ll take her out of her room and go downstairs so he can lie on the sofa in the hope that she’ll ‘fall asleep on him like in the movies’. It’s absurd.
If it was up to him we’d be doing the CIO or extinction method training her to sleep but I have refused. I’m tired too but she’s a whole new person and I can’t put my needs before hers.
I’ve tried talking to him a number of times. He won’t bother reading any books or articles about things like the baby sleep, temperament, benefits of white noise, or how to deal with a crying baby (she doesn’t actually cry that much at all, you just need to get her in the right position or comfort level). All he cares about is motorbikes and cars (it’s his passion and business) and that’s the only research he’s interested in. I do mostly everything for the baby even though I work part time. To put a further spanner in the works, we have a slight language barrier and so I find it really difficult to explain certain things to him as he speaks french and mine isn’t extensively fluent.
Is our parenting relationship doomed? Should I just step it up even more and not let him do the odd settling back to sleep in case it gets too intense for him? What about the bigger things though, when she starts walking and talking…

I (41M) and my girlfriend (39F) have been dating for almost 2 years. We each have children from previous marriages and work very hard to have a blended family with the kids even though we don’t live in the same house. I specifically spend quite a bit of time with her and her kids when I do not have my own as she has 60/40 custody while I have 50/50. In the time we have been together, I have grown to not only love her but love her 3 daughters (ages 7, 6, and 3) as well. We do everything from daily outings, play games, read bedtime stories, snuggle on the couch, etc. Girlfriend’s Ex husband has been diagnosed with Bipolar and has had several hospital emissions, wrecked vehicle, erratic behavior, manic episodes, in our time together due to not taking his medication and drinking alcohol during the times he is on it. This has resulted in court ordered, visitation restrictions, orders of protection, etc. along the way. Mid last year, girlfriend’s middle child came forward and told a very graphic and detailed story about her father sneaking into her bed in the middle of the night. Putting his hands down her pants and touching her inappropriately. Attorneys, Police, DCFS, everyone was called. To date, many more stories have come out from her, and her youngest involving sexual molestation, that frankly would make your stomach turn. Their stories are always filled with inconsolable tears, shaking, etc. The detail they can provide is incredible. It is heart breaking but the legal system does not seem very willing to help. Fairly recently, bodily fluids were observed on the middle child’s pajamas one morning after returning from their father’s house. After a trip to the hospital and another police report, the pants were tested for fluids. They came back “not enough sample to determine validity.” The girls have told these and many more stories to me, their grandparents, their teachers, their therapists, the police, and even their friends at school. All are so disgusting I cannot even begin to recap them and beyond anything a 6- and 3-year-old could ever conjure up themselves as a lie. DCFS has been called at least 4 times by these different people, police reports filled, we hired a GAL to speak for the kids in court. Not a single person has done anything. We are almost at the 1-year mark. The GAL has yet to speak to anyone involved, DCFS has a pending case but has not talked to anyone, the police have an open investigation, but nothing is coming of it. Their father is unwilling to speak to the police for their investigation despite their attempts. For the last few months, their father has had supervised visitation pending the results of the pajamas. That supervisor was his sister (despite our outward objections in court) and things have continued to happen because she leaves the kids alone with their dad when she is supposed to be watching. Or he has access to them in the middle of the night when no one is awake. On Tuesday we had a court date as the father’s attorney filed to reinstate his full parental rights because the pants came back inconclusive. The judge told us that because there was no physical evidence there was nothing he was going to do and he gave him his parenting time back, with unsupervised overnights! He said that he was not going to take away his rights. We have another court date set for a few months out, but these girls can’t wait that long. The sexual abuse continues and now he has full access to them. Who can we turn to that will help protect these kids from this monster? No one is doing anything to help. We are told that, everyone plays along to get along in the legal system so no one is going to fight. There must be some way to protect 3 innocent girls from someone who is sexually molesting and abusing them, when they don’t have a say in the legal system because of their ages. The judge will not hear what they have to say because they are too young, and he is not going to take their word over their father. The judge made it a point yesterday to say that Judicial Bias does not apply in this case if we don’t like his ruling because we agreed in pre-trial to accept his verdict. Current Attorney – No help, GAL – No help, DCFS – No help, Judge – No help. Police – Not yet. Where do we turn? We have tried to find a new attorney but have been unsuccessful as most will not even talk to us because we are currently represented. Please give us some direction. Today is the first night they must go back to their dads, and it has been exceptionally difficult. Uncontrolled tears and outward fear on their faces.

Still settling in my first dog, a 15 week old cocker spaniel called Anakin :) He’s doing great and is working with a trainer so some unrelated questions that haven’t come up very clearly in my research

1. Harness

I’m aware that certain types of harness are not advisable. He’s very good on a harness and has worked with both a puppy one and is now on a more sophisticated one, but is this the type of harness that limits movement across the shoulders?
https://ibb.co/sqwWgLk
If it is I’ll change it pronto, I’ve just been really struggling to find any resources that clearly show visually which harness types are good and which are bad for long term joint health

1. Days out

I’m aware that vets have largely vetoed the 5 minutes for a month of age walking rule so he’s been settling nicely into 2 25 minute walks a day. He’s yet to have a full day out but will be approaching his first ever long day out this Sunday. Up until now he’s been carried. For first days out, is it better to carry the puppy or allow them to walk and assess their behaviou responses. I am very concerned about his walking times in regards to joint health so I’m not sure if on days out (eg. This is a country show so there will be sitting to watch events in between) this same rule about watching out for walking duration times still applies. We did talk to the vet on our last visit but considering they were saying it was fine to risk walking him before his second vaccination I didn’t earnestly believe his advice too strongly. (He of course, was not walked prior to a week after second vaccine)

1. Introducing heavier chews

Another thing I’ve been struggling to find any decent resources for is when it’s the right time to move him to treats that are only permissable for dogs 4+ months (ie. Yak Chews, Lily Kitchen bedtime/breaktime biscuits, Buffalo Horn etc). Is this a case of 4 months of age is a good to go marker or is it a case of other things to watch out for before moving him onto these things? He’s only a week away from that age so I wasn’t sure if in a week that means he’s suitably ready for those things or not
Thanks in advance! :)

Baby will be 5 months old in two days, night weaned herself at 11 weeks old. We’ve been struggling with EMW for a while now, and in the last week baby has started waking earlier in the night too. All she needs is her pacifier and she’s right back to sleep (can’t yet replace it herself). I know pacifiers + sleep training is a whole separate thing and that specifically is not what I’m seeking feedback on. My question is—can we sleep train these MOTN/EMW without sleep training bedtime? Asking because baby is put down awake and falls asleep independently for naps and bedtime, so no need for sleep training at those times (at least not right now).
All my reading about sleep training seems to say that it starts with bedtime and you should use your chosen method for MOTN/EMW…but if baby doesn’t need the bedtime part and thus we don’t have a chosen method, is it appropriate to sleep train for those other wakings? I’ve seen some posts here that seem to indicate that EMW are just developmental right now and we really just have to ride it out. Hopefully this makes sense…

• How old are you? What's your gender? Give us a general description of yourself.
I am 18. Male. I'm a disciplined person with a variety of hobbies. I'm married, and leaving for Navy bootcamp in a week. I'm quick witted, I have a large soup of knowledge, and I spend time forming my opinions. I believe in values, principles and morals, often seeking to enforce them.
• Is there a medical diagnosis that may impact your mental stability somehow?
Aside from PTSD and MDD from a couple years ago, no. Namely because I've spent a lot of time healing myself.
• Describe your upbringing. Did it have any kind of religious or structured influence? How did you respond to it?
I grew up in a strict environment with a bedtime, rules I was meant to follow, and daily chores and errands I was meant to accomplish, else I'd be punished. No religious influence, although, my dad was a Marine, and I was raised accordingly.
• What do you do as a job or as a career (if you have one)? Do you like it? Why or why not?
Navy HM (hospital corpsman). I won't know if I like it or not until I finish A school, but this is the path I've been pursuing for 2 years.
• If you had to spend an entire weekend by yourself, how would you feel? Would you feel lonely or refreshed?
Mostly lonely. I'd find stuff to entertain myself, but I'd miss wife and talking to my buddies.
• What kinds of activities do you prefer? Do you like, and are you good at sports? Do you enjoy any other outdoor or indoor activities?
A mixture. I run 4-8 miles everyday. I enjoy running a lot, gives me time to refresh my head and think about whatever I need to think about. Same with exercise in general. But then again, I also enjoy things like drawing, reading, writing, and guitar.
To me, it doesn't really matter where I initiate these activities, it can be outside or inside.
• How curious are you? Do you have more ideas then you can execute? What are your curiosities about? What are your ideas about - is it environmental or conceptual, and can you please elaborate?
I'm a very curious person. When there's something to be told or something to be known, I will poke and pry until I've got all the details I need.
I think, sometimes I get more ideas than I can execute. But namely because I like to process a lot of ideas before moving forward, make sure I'm making the right decision
My curiosities could be about practical knowledge I come across, gossip, etc., I think I'm mostly just seeking a deeper understanding of what I can perceive. It's better to know something without reason than to not know something possibly useful later on.
My ideas tend to be environmental. I focus on solvable problems and tangible objects. With heavy focus on strategy and planning. I direct a lot of my energy towards the external.
• Would you enjoy taking on a leadership position? Do you think you would be good at it? What would your leadership style be?
I do enjoy leadership positions, but I'm not so sure how good I am at it, I sometimes dismiss emotions for rationality, making me pretty disagreeable in the face of opposition. I can be loud and aggressive. However, the good qualities are I'm decisive, competent, competitive, and strong willed. Things that I value. And I think, despite my emotional compassion, I could make up for it with my other qualities.
• Are you coordinated? Why do you feel as if you are or are not? Do you enjoy working with your hands in some form? Describe your activity?
I would say I'm pretty coordinated. I try to do things the correct way everytime and allow myself little room to fuck up. It's mostly for efficiency, time/effort ratio. It was also the way I was taught when I was younger, and I see no reason to change something that already works.
I do enjoy working with my hands. I like fixing machinery that was broken, I like Martial Arts, especially kickboxing, I like cooking, etc., a lot of my activities are done with my hands and require hand to eye communication
• Are you artistic? If yes, describe your art? If you are not particular artistic but can appreciate art please likewise describe what forums of art you enjoy. Please explain your answer.
I am artistic. I generally create things that are pretty dark and vivid. Like, when I draw, I draw very contrasted and shadowed anatomy. I pretty much only build Dark Soulsy stuff in Minecraft. Every story I've ever written was meant to be suspenseful and grotesque. Etc.
And likewise, I enjoy works with the same viscosity. Such as Alex Gray and Zdzisław Beksiński.
• What's your opinion about the past, present, and future? How do you deal with them?
The past is something to learn from, the present is something to control, and the future and something to work towards. Simple as. My head is generally in the future, though. I can spend time thinking about the past, or living in the present, but I'm generally thinking about the future.
I don't really know how I "deal" with them. They're just something that exists and I have to coexist with them.
• How do you act when others request your help to do something (anything)? If you would decide to help them, why would you do so?
Most of the time, I enjoy helping. Depending on the person, though. The more somebody needs help, the less I'll respect them. Namely because I values autonomy and competency.
That said, I do enjoy giving my advices or guiding somebody's opinions, or even helping with menial tasks like chores.
• Do you need logical consistency in your life?
Yes. Always.
• How important is efficiency and productivity to you?
Very important. Without something to do or somewhere to go, I feel restless and useless. And so, I compensate for this lack of identity by working on myself and the things around me.
• Do you control others, even if indirectly? How and why do you do that?
I think so. I tend to enforce my own set of rules built from values and morals and try to keep people in line. Even simple things like "Wipe your feet before walking into the house".
But in a manipulative sense, I try to avoid that. I live with a lot of manipulative people and seeing them tells me exactly what I should avoid being.
• What are your hobbies? Why do you like them?
Drawing, reading, writing, guitar, running, debating, etc., just stuff I've been doing since I was pretty young.
• How good are you at strategizing? Do you easily break up projects into manageable tasks? Or do you have a tendency to wing projects and improvise as you go?
I'm pretty good at strategizing. I put a lot of my mental focus into strategizing. And I do simplify projects, although that's not to so that I don't put a lot of improv into them.
• What are your aspirations in life, professionally and personally?
Get through the Navy while studying in medical school to become a doctor.
• What are your fears? What makes you uncomfortable? What do you hate? Why?
I fear being controlled. Being useless or wasteful. I'm uncomfortable with big displays of emotion, although I tolerate it with some people. And I hate people who live for nothing. Like the alcoholic living on my couch.
• What do the "highs" in your life look like?
Money, happy wife, good amount of self growth
• What do the "lows" in your life look like?
Something tragic happens
• How attached are you to reality? Do you daydream often, or do you pay attention to what's around you? If you do daydream, are you aware of your surroundings while you do so?
I think it's a mixture of both. I use reality to navigate my daydreaming, because I daydream about the future. So I'm grounded but grounded in the sense that I use what I can see to control what I daydream about.
• Imagine you are alone in a blank, empty room. There is nothing for you to do and no one to talk to. What do you think about?
Exiting the room
• How long do you take to make an important decision? And do you change your mind once you've made it?
I make decisions really fast. I generally don't change my mind.
• How long do you take to process your emotions? How important are emotions in your life?
Takes me weeks and emotions are only important to me to an extent. It's hard for me to gauge how I feel about something but I do try to understand that part of myself.
• Do you ever catch yourself agreeing with others just to appease them and keep the conversation going? How often? Why?
No, if I don't agree they will hear about it.
• Do you break rules often? Do you think authority should be challenged, or that they know better? If you do break rules, why?
I'm not a rule breaker but I don't believe in blindly following whatever rules an authority figure decides to impose. If the rules don't make sense to me then I won't follow. Although in some situations, I can't do anything, so I'll leave it be, despite my disagreement.

Monday night, my boyfriend (21M) and I (20F) got into an argument. He knew well in advance that I would have to wake up at 8AM tomorrow to leave my parents house so it could be appraised. I reminded him about it later that night at around 11PM and asked for a bedtime story. For background, it’s a thing we started a few months ago when I was vulnerable with him and told him that I can’t fall asleep without a story. He insisted he’d become my “human Audible” and it’s been great since. He sometimes forgets to do it because he loses track of time, so I figured I’d help him by reminding him. Midnight struck and I was a little disappointed and tired, so I told him I was just going to bed. He then texted me telling me he wanted to play video games with his friends and he’d call me later when they were done… at 2AM.
I’m usually rather patient and am able to let some things go. But I got extremely upset at him and I told him so over text. This is not the first, second, or third time he prioritized his friends and his video games over me and my time. I told him I was disgusted and disappointed that he would rather make me wait until 2AM instead of reading me just one story before playing his video games all night. He ignored me. Of course, at 2AM he texts me instead of calling me like he said he would and just went, “Aw darn, too bad! Guess I’ll have to read you a story in the morning hehe.” Perhaps this was petty of me, but instead of ignoring the notifications (he has emergency bypass, so I still hear the buzzes and rings even with my ringer off) I just texted him back, “Nah, no need to wait. I’m still awake :)” He tried to make excuses through text. I told him to call me like he said he would and until then, I was ignoring his messages. 3AM, he finally calls, and I immediately laid into him. He whined and complained that he was tired, he couldn’t really talk, blah blah blah. I ended the call.
In the morning, he texted me all upset, asking if I would still come over to his house. I said I would. I drove over, but instead of going inside, I asked him to come to the car. Like a “meet me in the middle” sort of thing, but physically. He ignored my messages and insisted he “needed comfort” because I was “so mean” last night. I waited 20 minutes and he never came outside, despite me continuously asking. This is important to me because I am ALWAYS going outside to welcome him. He ALWAYS complains that “no one has ever done it for him before.” And yet he doesn’t even do it for me. So I told him, “I’m not going inside. You refuse to come outside for even two seconds and show me you care enough to just stand on your sidewalk and welcome me. I’m going home.”
I called him when I got home (because he kept asking me to call “to make sure I’m comfortable with him calling me”) and the argument continued. I told him that he is manipulative, a liar, and a terrible boyfriend for the amount of inappropriate double standards he puts into our relationship. He then complained that I’m more argumentative than before, that I’m insensitive to his feelings, and that he wished I was back to “normal, before we were dating.” He then tried to backtrack and say he meant he wanted me to be “the girl I was dating in the beginning.”
I don’t care what he meant. Whether he meant he wants me to act as I did when we were “just friends” or be “the girl he fell in love with,” I am going with what feels best. I gave him so many warnings, chances, graciousness, you name it. I gave it all to him and he stomped them into the ground while spitting in my face. So no more.
This is positive for me. Some may see it as petty or cruel. But to me, this is what’s for the best. I’m tired of being used by people who claim to “love me for who I am.” I’m no longer allowing him to see me when I am vulnerable or ask him for favors anymore. I am refusing to do anything for him that requires commitment or do any favors for him that require me paying for him. I am done helping him through his emotions when he mocks mine. I’m done.
If he refuses to break up with me, I don’t care. I will do as I please now because that’s how I was when we were first dating. I was carefree and fun, surrounded by the things I chose to be in my life. He will no longer be automatically a part of that. He will only be there when I choose for him to be there.
It hurts a little, I’ll admit. But I’ll get over it. He wanted me to be “less emotional” and more resilient. So here I am. Resilient.

I. Introduction
Let's face it: mornings can make or break your day.
Ever had one of those days where you hit snooze one too many times, stumble out of bed, and feel like you're already behind before the day even starts?
Yeah, we've all been there. But what if I told you that mastering your mornings could be the key to unlocking your productivity at work? That's right.
In this article, we'll dive into three game-changing morning habits that will supercharge your productivity and set you up for success in the workplace.
II. Rise and Shine: The Importance of Morning Routine
There's a reason why successful people like CEOs and entrepreneurs swear by their morning routines—it's because they work. Science backs it up too.
Your morning routine sets the tone for the entire day, influencing your mood, energy levels, and productivity. By establishing a consistent morning routine, you're essentially programming your brain for success.

“Just one small positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.” – Dalai Lama

So, let's rise and shine, shall we?
III. Habit 1: Early Rising
Picture this: the world is still asleep, the air is crisp, and you have the entire morning to yourself.
That's the beauty of waking up early.
Not only does it give you a head start on the day, but it also allows you to tackle your most important tasks when your mind is fresh and distractions are minimal.
But if you're not a morning person (yet), fear not.
With a few simple tweaks to your bedtime routine and some strategic alarm clock placement, you'll be embracing the early bird lifestyle in no time.
IV. Habit 2: Mindful Mindset
Ever heard the saying, "mind over matter"?
Well, when it comes to productivity, your mindset plays a crucial role. Cultivating a positive mindset in the morning can set the tone for a productive day ahead.
Whether it's practicing gratitude, visualizing success, or simply taking a few deep breaths to center yourself, incorporating mindfulness techniques into your morning routine can work wonders for your productivity and overall well-being.
V. Habit 3: Strategic Planning
They say failing to plan is planning to fail, and nowhere is that more true than in the workplace. Taking a few minutes in the morning to map out your day can make all the difference between chaos and control.
Whether it's jotting down your top priorities, time-blocking your schedule, or setting actionable goals, strategic planning ensures that you're focused, organized, and ready to tackle whatever the day throws your way.

“New morning, new moment of miracles.” – Lailah Gifty Akita

VI. Bonus Tips for Supercharging Your Mornings
Looking to take your morning routine to the next level?
Here are a few bonus tips to supercharge your mornings and maximize your productivity:

1. Incorporate exercise: Whether it's a quick jog around the block or a yoga session in your living room, getting your body moving in the morning can boost your energy levels and sharpen your focus.
2. Stay hydrated: Start your day off right by drinking a glass of water as soon as you wake up. Hydration is key to staying alert and focused throughout the day.
3. Fuel your body: They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day for a reason. Choose nutrient-rich foods that will nourish your body and fuel your brain for optimal performance.

VII. Crafting Your Ideal Morning Routine
Now that you have the tools and strategies to transform your mornings, it's time to craft your ideal morning routine.
Remember, there's no one-size-fits-all approach to morning routines. Experiment with different habits and find what works best for you.
Whether it's waking up early, practicing mindfulness, or planning your day with precision, the key is consistency. Stick with it, and watch as your productivity soars to new heights.
VIII. Wrapping Up: Embracing Your Productive Mornings
Congratulations! You've taken the first step towards mastering your mornings and boosting your productivity at work.
By implementing these three morning habits—early rising, mindful mindset, and strategic planning—you'll be well on your way to achieving your goals and crushing them in the workplace. So, rise and shine, my friend. Your most productive days are just beginning.
To your success -- M.Albashir
FAQs
Q: I'm not a morning person. Can I still benefit from these habits? A: Absolutely! While becoming an early riser might take some time and effort, you can still reap the benefits of a mindful mindset and strategic planning at any time of day.
Q: How long does it take to establish a morning routine? A: It varies from person to person, but experts say it takes about 21 days to form a new habit. Be patient with yourself and stay consistent.
Q: What if I have a hectic schedule in the morning? A: Even if you have a busy morning, carving out just a few minutes for each of these habits can make a big difference. Remember, it's about quality, not quantity.

My child has been an angel with sleep. She was two in February.
Sleeping through the night since 14 months and for about 5 months bedtime has just been wind down, have a cuddle in her bedroom and pop her in her crib at 7.45pm. She would either go straight to sleep or happily laid in her cot until she fell sleep. No training, no CIO, she just did it on her own.
ANYWAY .. baby number two is coming 24th June, my partner works away 2 weeks at work 1 week home so I solo parent, alot. I’m having a c section and lifting, bending 15kg in and out of a crib will be tough. So I thought hey, let’s do her big girl room and get her used to it before the baby comes.
We got her a lovely floor bed, did her whole room, it’s beautiful. BUT our 5 minute bedtime now takes over an hour. We started to read a couple of books, have a cuddle and she gets in bed, I sit next to her for a little while and say good night. Obviously the second I leave the room she’s up, over and over. It’s hard to keep my cool cause by 8pm I’m done, it my time 😅
Anyway if I do manage to get her to lay down she becomes hysterical.
It’s only been a week so it’s all new and I’m trying to crack the code but if anyone has any tricks, routines that’s worked. Please share
I have 5 weeks to make it work

Ok, this is going to be a long one, so if you stick with me, thank you in advance.
My oldest daughter is nearly six and she is like me in so many ways. Yesterday she had a dentist appointment. Everything went well. The dentist told her that her teeth are gorgeous and also gently told her that she needs to stop sucking her fingers. I didn’t think much of it, she’s sucked her fingers as a self-soothing mechanism since she was a baby.
Fast forward to bedtime that night. A little after putting her to bed she was crying. I went in and checked on her, gave her a big hug and kiss, and she tried to go to sleep again. Then more crying, repeat. On the third time I asked her if she wanted to come snuggle with me for a bit and she said yes, but was still crying. With more coaxing, she finally fessed up saying “I can’t sleep without my fingers”, and I finally got it. She was trying to follow the dentist’s instructions of no more finger-sucking, but now without a way to self-soothe she felt lost.
I tried to validate saying that I see how much she wants to follow the dentist’s instructions, and how much she cares about doing the “right” thing, and suggested that we first start with not sucking fingers anymore during the day (she sometimes does it while relaxing or watching tv), and then we can move on to stopping at night. She agreed, and within five minutes was asleep.
Later I cried. It breaks my heart how much pressure she puts on herself to be a “good girl”. I’m the exact same way, and while some of that pressure is definitely external (thanks society), some of it seems to be innate. I’ve worked so much the last few years on self-compassion and ways to lessen that pressure, and it’s breaking my heart that she is struggling with the same thing.
No one told her “ok, no more fingers in your mouth starting now!” She just decided that the rule was set and now she needed to abide by it, and it was an unreasonable expectation.
I know the finger-sucking isn’t the best for her teeth, and we will work to find new self-soothing behaviors, but immediately stopping it at the cost of her crying herself to sleep doesn’t seem worth it to me. So that’s not what I’m worried about.
How do I help her challenge these perfectionistic “good girl” tendencies? Have other moms helped their children navigate this? I’ve always tried to validate her feelings, even the “unpleasant” ones, and been very neutral when she makes mistakes emphasizing that it is part of the human experience and totally normal, but this is so hard. She just seems predisposed, as I am, to feel very upset whenever she isn’t living up to some unreasonable standard she’s set in her head. Any thoughts? Thanks for reading. 💕

So you know how there’s so much skepticism about the pyramids right? How could they be so fucking perfect with the technology at the time being so underdeveloped? As well as it’s impossible for any human to make a contraption that could be able to build one no matter what they wanna say the history is.
As well as, the stones for the pyramids date back to before the time of the Egyptians, and theres even underwater pyramids. AND the stones to make one came from a source that was over 100 miles away impossible for any underdeveloped man made contraption from THAT long ago. No WAY their boats could ferry them across the Nile. One block is 2.3 tons. Even with our tech today, the scientists can’t recreate them perfectly. And what if it’s simply because it’s a lost technology from a civilization more advanced than us. Before even the quote en quote dinosaurs.
My theory also loops in the Pangea theory
Pangea was supposed to date back to 100-300 million years ago. Where all the world was one continent. Which would make sense of some fossils having the other half of it, being found in different continents
WHAT IF
There was an advanced civilization much like our own but better, that colonized all of Pangea, and went through a nuclear war, from not being able to properly agree on governing their own separate areas, there’s no way one continent could be a utopia. in turn creating the continents, and the left over humans turned into fucked up forms of humans, the ones who survived at least, from the radiation. But 100-300 million years would be enough time for that civilization affected by the radiation to evolve back into what we know as present day human because it’s already in their DNA strands. Evolution still plays a crucial role. It’s the only way things are able to well, evolve. As well as it doesn’t make sense for us to evolve from monkeys because we exist at the same time as them. Wouldn’t you think ALL of the monkeys would’ve evolved into humans? There’s so many things in the world we just can’t explain, so many things we can’t quite trace back, hieroglyphics could just be bedtime stories, and a lot of our history could be wrong, or just a tailored form of what the government wants us to think assuming they even know the truth. Who fuckin knows.

I’ve been lurking and reading up tips from here and figured it’s my turn to share what worked for me to hopefully give insight to anyone that may need it!
Just want to prefix this by saying that my little one was a great sleeper until 4 month regression kicked in. We were using side bassinet by our bed so I could slide him closer when I know it’s time to feed. This worked great and he slept 16-18 hours/day except during the 3 week growth spurt (we tracked with huckleberry). Rarely had to carry to soothe (only if we were out and he gets overtired) We also had an established bedtime routine since about 2-3 weeks.
Now the four month regression kicked and we definitely knew because he was waking up every 2-3 hours. I put him to sleep while nursing, so he would look for me each time he wakes up because that’s how he fell asleep. Since nursing while side laying worked prior, I would offer breast and he’d fall asleep instantly to less than 5 minutes. I should’ve known he wasn’t waking due to hunger because he didn’t fully nurse, just a nibble to help him sleep. Because I was sleepy and wanting him to sleep right away I would repeat this multiple times a night. If nursing doesn’t work then my husband had to carry him to sleep. It lasted about a week until my husband and I decided we can’t keep doing this.
We decided to try sleep training, specifically Ferber, and we were so surprised! We detached his bassinet so he wouldn’t look for me for soothing and hopefully start encouraging him to self-soothe. We dropped him in the bassinet awake and drowsy having enough wake window prior to bedtime. He fell asleep no fuss within 12 minutes (I kept a diary of the first week of sleep training). We realize our little one had what it takes to fall asleep on his own but we, as the parents were so used to doing it a certain way that we were crutching him.
As the days go by he would fall asleep faster and faster 12-> 9-> 7-> 6.5 -> 6 -> 5-> 4 mins. He was waking up the first 4 days and we followed a check in routine of 3min-5 mins, 8 mins, 10 mins, 15 mins. We rarely got to 15 mins. By day 4 he was having longer stretches of sleep and we see him wake but he turns and falls right back to sleep. Other times he’s awake content talking to himself then next he’s asleep.
My little one is almost five months now, there are still times when he’s fussier and that’s okay. It doesn’t last longer than 15mins, usually if we had a late nap so he had more energy and not wanting to sleep yet. This link explains this for me pretty well https://www.preciouslittlesleep.com/power-down-to-sleep/ Now he sleeps 9-11hr stretches from 730~8pm , usually wake 530~6am for feed, then sleeps till ~9am. We didn’t notice any changes to his attitude during the day since sleep training, still our happy active baby.
So glad we decided to try sleep training, getting better sleep helped me be more active and purposeful during his wake time. I believe learning to sleep independently is beneficial in the long term. I had to step back and train myself not to automatically offer breast to get my son to self soothe and now he sleeps better than ever. There’s no one size fits all, so tailor a sleep guide to your child’s need and what you can be consistent with!
Wishing you and your little one better sleep!

[OC Intro: The game is modded to increase basic jobs cost, seasonal events are disabled. Much of the crash details are based on NASA/SP-2008-565 Columbia Crew Survival Investigation Report recommendations especially Chapter 3 "Occupant Protection".]
The ship is without power, and Tightniks can't run the radar much without draining the batteries. He has only a few minutes of APU power left, goes over the best clearing he can find, and radars it. It varies by only a few feet from the aerodynamic glideslope there. He spots it out on the cameras and circles to go after that spot. He's only at two hundred feet now. With one hand on the stick, he uses the other to open the pressure equalization valve on the side hatch, then at one hundred feet, gets it undogged. Depending on how much damage he's going to get, it's less likely to be stuck closed and trap him. The dynamic vacuum this pulls in the cockpit rips most of the survival pack data cards from that rack and scatters them across the landscape. Crap, I'm gonna need those! Refocusing on surviving the next few seconds, he turns on the radar for the final approach, takes a last look around, then straight ahead at his forward camera and PFD, he clicks his HANS and shoulder strap locks in; after that, he can barely move, but that now is better than dying in this crash with a broken neck. He's a decent pilot and brings up the flare gently. Bringing up the alpha on this delta-winged ship, he balloons a little, but keeps the nose going up and restores a zero aerodynamic sink rate just above the highest terrain indicated by the radar altimeter. The ship bumps a little in the ground effect, and he can see the radar altitude cycling irregularly up and down about five feet at a time. Rougher than it looked from higher up! The body flap protecting the dead engines hits first, and the nose comes rapidly down. It hits, the screens go blank, and Tightniks is surrounded by airbags, some lifting his feet from the rudder petals and his hand from the control stick. It's blinding, it's disorienting, it's noisy, and, to his relief, it's long! It takes several seconds before the crashing cockpit stops moving. How many times did he flip over? Did he go sideways and roll? Am I rightside up? Are we really stopped on the ground? The airbags deflate, and he can move his arms. He gets his restraints loose and inspects himself. "Uck!" he says out loud (without the 'f'). No broken bones. His pressure suit can take his blood pressure. 116/81, pulse 112, blood oxygen 99 reads off on his left arm, I'll friggin' take it!
The ship is amazingly intact from what he can tell. He can't get any readings. The systems test meter seems to be working, but can't find any voltages anywhere. The ship seems to be completely dead. Behind him, 10 passenger seats are all surrounded by airbags and the back of the cabin ends in some sort of dirt-and-gravel and there's a bit of daylight seeping in around the edges. He was the only one on board, though, so their deployment was mostly academic (they might have stiffened the structure a little during the crash, but that's probably trivial.) Tightniks gets out of his spacesuit. The air on this planet is actually breathable. He gets the hatch open, steps outside and-
"A green shimmer erupts then disappears, and you hit the ground."
The human emerges from the glowing green mist and hits the ground. Groans. Pushes against that ground, trying to get back up. Where am I? What's my name? I remember nothing. Aren't babies born naked? He's got a dark blue button-down shirt on. A uniform? A shoulder patch. Gets up, looks around. I feel really heavy. I'm not that fat, am I? He picks up a small stone from the ground, this also feels heavier than it should. He rises to his feet and holds it out somewhat (he's unable to fully extend his arm) and lets it go. The stone hits the ground near his feet quickly and with remarkable speed. It's the gravity, it's greater than it is on- ...where am I from? This is- ...not my home planet? "Oooh..."
"Ka?" it says.
What is that? It's cute, at least.
It is not tame. He has no hope of catching it on foot. The creature seems to like the berries. Maybe if I gather some of those into one place and set some kind of trap...
33s: First trap.
I got one! The human lumbers up to the trap and gets the catch open. Do you bite? It doesn't matter much to me; I'm so friggin' screwed.
It doesn't. It looks at the human with a sense of wonder, actually. A blink and tilt of the head. Seems almost to be asking, Is it you? My purpose? My savior? Once out of the trap, which is totally wrecked, he has to make a new one from scratch, it follows him around like a imprinted hatchling bird.
Wiry little fella, you are. You're going to need some bulking up to do anything useful. The- ...'trimp', I guess... The trimp seems just barely able to feed itself. The human lets him into the broken ship's intact cabin, and it curls up comfortably in a passenger seat for a nap.
1m03s: Second trap.
"Apparently the Trimps breed if they're not working. Doesn't look pleasant."
What are they doing?
The trimps appear to be androgynous, and these two have paired off in the back of the ship. They're holding something carefully within a few hours, feeding it berries, grass, and- ...corundum.
Corundum?? Whatever that is, it isn't a baby.
1m35s: Third trap.
Only it IS a baby! The third trimp he trapped immediately joined the other two in raising it. They have a strange diet of food the human has found compatible with his own body, but they also eat rocks! They're careful to crush and sort aluminate minerals from silcate ones and only eat aluminate. Actually, they don't eat aluminate, they're only feeding it to the baby.
2m06s: Fourth trap.
All four are raising the same child, who is just starting to toddle. It seems these fellas have alumina or maybe even aluminum bones. The human takes a nap and wakes to find the first child grown up and they're starting to raise a second child, all five of them.
2m46s: Huts.
The human found a working bit of electronics. He calls it a pad, but maybe it's more like a smartphone. It has plans for two residential structures. The first, the smaller one, he can build right away, but the second one needs something called "drywall", and he has to figure out how to make that before he can build it. Huts and houses, apparently.
3m13s: 10 pop, full, first farmer.
The trimp he trained to farm and make paper took an incredible 50 units of food to get bulked up to do the work, and now it's not participating in rearing the child. But less than an hour after the trimp started farming and pulping, the child was out on its own, and the trimps did not start another. The ten seats on the ship were all full. Well, eleven counting the one up front that the human sleeps in. The pilot starts exploring the area.
3m28s: Battle.
Wait, what are you do-
The hostile roars and charges at the human, but one of his trimps jumps in front of him with a stick and they fight. It started right when the human got far enough away from the ship that the hostile non-trimps away from the ship began to regard him as leaving his own territory. After the trimp defeats the first enemy, it continues after other hostiles.
3m53s: Shield I in Z1c5.
The human is easily able to recover the loot in the territory cleared by the fighting trimp. Then he sees something glinting in the- That can't be! What the heck is that? It's a data card that fits his pad. It quite clearly regards trimp combat. He gets it loaded into his pad and studies it. I can do this, it just takes some wood. He returns to the ship to discover that they had already started on a new child before the fighter had even expired in battle. The human concentrates on his research.
4m38s: Mskel in Z1c11 defeated.
The remains of this one seem rather white and shiny. It's titanium! This enemy had titanium bones! He'll store them away. They'll be useful someday, I'm sure.
5m52s: Dagger I in Z1c20.
Where are these data cards coming from? The human wonders as he loads this one into his pad, It's for a weapon it calls a dagger. He blinks. I don't know what a dagger is. I'll take your word for it, data card. Needs metal. He has gathered some, but ore is plentiful. He can just dig and smelt it whenever he wants. For now, I'll continue researching.
6m18s: Arable in Z1c21.
It's an old cave that trimps like to live in. Why weren't they able to live there before? How could these friendly critters be confined to only the exact spot where THAT thing, he looks back where he came from, not remembering that he piloted the wrecked ship to its current resting place, crashed? This is really strange. I'll let them fill up this cave before advancing further. Wait, what about defenses? The hostiles never try to reclaim territory that they've lost, so he stops worrying about that fairly quickly.
8m22s: First hut is 0.3% first ever AP.
The trimps seem fairly easy to please in terms of living quarters. Two move into his first hut and start raising a child. The human has his tent, uniform, and the heater pilfered from his space suit. Not much of a mud fan.
9m59s: Miners in Z1c30.
Oh, what's on this data card? Sl3niw? Oh, I'm holding the pad upside down. Miners. I can teach trimps how to mine ores and smelt met- 200 units of food? Each job is getting more expensive to train a trimp for. He puts his bee nickels to his eyes and spots another data card probably 10 enemies away. "Sc"? Does that means science? I can teach trimps to do science??
13m57s: Scientists in Z1c40.
Due to the expense of training trimps, the human couldn't afford to build them shields until now, he's got Sh1-3 made for the fighter to capture the science training data card. 14m02s: One head went into that turtlimp shell, that of his fighter, but two came out: his fighter still has his head on, and he managed to get the turtlimp's head off. It rushes off after the deadly penguimp in the next cell. The shields are not doing all that much good, actually, but they're better than nothing. The human picks up and loads the science data card and- Holy runny sugar-free fudge crap! 1000 food units, but it'll endow them with the ability to speak. Good. I'm getting bored with no one to talk to.
14m28s: Bloodlust purchased and AutoFight enabled (that delay after getting it is an effect of jacking up the job cost.)
As the human buries this expired little trimp warrior, he comes to the sobering realization that he has more trimp graves in his growing trimp colony than he does live trimps. And yet they seem more hopeful now than before I got to know any of them. They seem to think I'm the solution to all their problems or- Those two look east somberly, then notice that he's watching them and smile back and wave at him. ...one problem that is specific, but very, very huge for them. [The only reason I say 'east' is because that's right on a map, and the game advances right across a row, then up. I might say 'northeast' on occasion for that reason.]
20m47s: Z1c73, Miners taken.
Are you my new mining foreman? The trimp who took to the mining training has dark brown fur that lays flat on its head. It's unusual in not having any bits that stick out from its head, ahoge or whatever. This one is relatively quiet, and while it has assimilated the mining and smelting knowledge, it needs to bulk up to do any mining. Smelting is relatively easy, and getting a strong natural draft going in a furnace is almost trivial with the increased gravity. This trimp builds furnaces like nothing. And likes to nap in holes it digs right on the spot; it's weird that way. [Puchim@s Yukipo, and furnaces are not explicit in Trimps.]
21m58s: Farming in Z1c80.
The resourcing "books" are not data cards but paper scrolls, apparently lost to the trimps. It seems that they were civilized in the recent past and some calamity swept over the planet to reduce them to this. Did I have something to do with it? Amnesia sucks harder than a Dyson- ...what's a Dyson? Whatever, it sucks. This disaster happening just before I crash in the only spot with trimps still alive would be a seriously crazy coincidence! Something is really, really wrong about all this. [The author has not sought or received product placement permission or fee from Dyson Technology Ltd. or any resellers of their stuff, just they literally suck balls and made my favorite vacuum cleaner.]
23m50s: Builder in Z1c90.
They've rescued an, I dunno, gelding trimp? It just started to build a shed around the piled lumber I left to build one. It's really slow compared to me, and just banged its thumb, but it is super cute with that long reddish head fur. That particular trimp is also fascinated with pink ribbons and likes to decorate its head fur with them. Because of its inherent inability to participate in rearing children, it isn't counted in the population. [Puchim@s Io, builder on the basis of Iori seen building in 1x10.]
26m02s: Zone 2, 44 pop, 5.5s RC with Z0/1.
It's some sort of tactical manual - tactical coordination. Coordination! He's starting to sort out some trimpese on the research he has done so far. It needs a lot of metal, so they won't be able to implement it for some time. Hopefully, they're still good one at a time, but these enemies seem to be getting bigger as we go along. Uh oh!
27m33s: Gym in Z2c5.
It's some sort of training dojo or sporting arena. The human examines the ruins, I think I can back-engineer drawings for this, get one built, and see what happens.
29m02s: 1g, 47 pop, 10.8s RC with Z1/2.
The two fighting trimps now with their gym and coordination are dodging and blocking enthusiastically, and making much faster ground against the bad guys then a little while ago when it was just one trimp fighting at a time and unable to avoid the enemy hitting back.
40m46s: Fresh turkimp in Z2c74, 63 pop, 7.9s RC, Sh1-10, Da1-5, Bo1-3, Ma1-3, Hm1-3, 6g.
Oh, wow, the laborers seem really hot after this turkimp. He cooks it up and tries a slice. It's really awesome! I have to work alongside his laboring trimps to share it, but I'm getting used to the gravity now. That scroll we found back in Z2c10 really helped. Trimps' techniques and appliances for handicapped individuals, and I'm really handicapped in this higher gravity. He joins the woodcutters with the turkimp; they're the most numerous resource laborer right now, building more gyms, enough that the block/dodge ability of the fighting trimps is almost caught up to the enemy's ability to cause damage.
43m15s: Zone 3, 63 pop, 7.9s RC with Z1/2.
I'm neglecting my science and trimp scientists are really expensive. Curiously, that grey-haired one can't speak all that well, only says "Tai" and "Shijou", but it can write and draw like nobody's business. It's the only scientist so far. [Puchim@s Takanya: Online references probably still claim that she can utter the first two syllables of any word, but she can actually utter only the first two kana syllables of someone's name, most often the given name of basis human Takane Shijou, who also has that habit. (All the utterances of the puchidoru are based on the speech foibles of their basis humans except maybe Piyopiyo, where I haven't seen anything match up so far.)]
47m32s: Finally, we can make drywall and houses. 59m30s: Z3c77, 94 pop, 7.8s RC.
Oh, those poor things are really struggling up at the front. These trimps are enthusiastic and know no fear, but I still feel like telling them to stop for a while. I don't have the heart to keep them from trying while they're still doing some damage.
1h05m24s: Zone 4, 107 pop, 9.3s RC with Z3/4. 1h15m26s: Zone 5, 120 pop, 8.2s RC with Z3/4.
"What is that?" the human asks. He has three scientists. His first does all the writing, but the other two can actually speak. One of them hops up on a rock spire beside the human to reach his eye level.
At the next ridge line, over the lowest and most passable gap in the terrain, this really mean looking hovering sausage monster.
"I dunno," the scientist trimp shrugs, "But it's making me hungry. Looks like a perfectly cooked frankfurter from here." [John Morell's dubious dirigibles.]
"Oh, yeah," the human nods, "that's a blimp."
"A blimp?" the trimp tilts its head quizzically at the human, "How could you know?"
"I wish I could tell you, little buddy," the human extends his arm braces to descend the pass on the side of the zone boundary in the boss enemy's direction, then grunts, "Let's go kill it."
1h16m11s: Z1c9, 120 pop, 10.3s RC with Z4/5. 1h33m34s: Zone 6, 151 pop, 7.4s RC with Z4/5.
1h33m54s: TP in Z1c3.
"What's this?" the human asks, having picked up the little square document with the curling corners.
"Oh," the hungry scientist looks at it, "It's a garden path, follow me."
"You want to lead me down the garden path?" the human says.
"Yeah," the scientist says.
"Are you kidding?" the human asks.
"No," says the other scientist, "We don't get human humor. Listen, these fighters can't go, let them wear themselves out here, then we'll take the next group through this garden."
"Okay," the human nods, watching two more trimps join the fray as he issues the Z5 coordination orders, "they're doing pretty well after all that block training research we just wrapped up." [That's a common artifact, even in normal games, Z5 Traintacular combines with many gyms, enough population to add several trainers, affording Blockmaster, which is expensive on a run zero, plus a break on Tion Z5, a 40% all-stat increase. I don't think Zach designed it into the game on purpose, it just worked out this way.]
1h34m07s: 151 pop, 10.5s RC with Z5/7. 1h37m44s: Drop from Z6c39, TP for 3.
"Now we have these access map frags we can use to route through the old trimpopoli," the scientist explains, "Atlimpis for food, Morimpa for gems, Everimp for metal, and Impazon for wood."
"What about the garden?" the human asks.
"Well, we got lucky with Tricky Paradise," the scientist says, "but you can randomize the route and maybe get lucky. What's with that look?"
"Somehow, I'm remembering 'frag' as something that blew up with deadly pieces," the human says. [Different video games - ones with better graphics and worse gameplay Ｏ(>▽<)Ｏ]
1h39m59s: Blues back up to the top on series I...
"Tai, Tai!" the first ever trimp scientist stops the human just before he upgrades the mace and dagger to Mk.6 and Mk. 8 respectively. It has a note for him.
"Why do you keep calling me that?" the human asks, "Do you think that's my name?"
"Shijou, Shijou," it nods as though to indicate, I KNOW it is. Then it proffers its note again. The human takes it and reads, "Don't upgrade the first row equipment right now."
"Why not?" the human asks.
"Shijou," it points at the end of the mapped route, where there's a scroll sticking out of the thistles.
2h24m07s: Zone 8, 224 pop, 12.2s RC with Z7/12.
"Your settlement is getting crowded, there's Trimps in the streets, and you're taking heat. You feel a sudden strong desire to create a map, though you're not quite sure how that would help."
2h49m10s: Zone 9, 357 pop, 9.5s RC with Z8/15.
"You can't shake the feeling that you've been here before. Déjà-vu?"
The trimps really seem to like the new high capacity mansions, and the village has rapidly expanded since they started building them.
"There's something familiar about this," the human says.
"Tai," the grey one that writes clings to his arm and shows him a note that says, "Don't give up now."
"We must persist," says the yellow one has found a foothold it can grab onto and grabs the human's shoulder gently, "If you give up to early, we'll never solve this. You'll be stuck here forever."
The human puts his hand over the trimp's paw on his shoulders, then looks at him, "I can die, too."
"No, you can't," the trimp says quietly, "Please don't test that, tall one."
"Death is just another path..." he remembers.
"Gan," the grey one squeaks. [That's the first two kana syllables of "Gandalf"]
"...one that we all must take," the human continues, "The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it-"
"A green mist," the yellow trimp interrupts, "flash of fire, we're all gone and our progress forgotten. The wandering stars return to that day, and you again crash that ship- ...a little better every time."
"Wait," the human looks around, "have I been here before?"
"I-" the yellow trimp tries in futility to share what little it knows, "...or... somebody got just a little coolant into the-"
"Into the what?"
"This side up," the grey one's note says.
"Into the that," the yellow one points at the note, "It really helped. You- ...I don't think we've ever had mansions before."
Well, of course they didn't have mansions before. That was one of my ship's data cards. How did it get way out here? Will anything start to make sense?
3h02m13s: Zone 10, 387 pop, 8.7s RC with Z8/15; '28s: 11.1s RC with Z9/19. 3h16m41s: Tough snimp after food book, L10 rand dept from lo-hi-med 118/25/96, 4 Items.
"That's twice our frags led us to gem-rich Moria," the human says.
"Morimpa," the new red trimp scientist corrects, there now being 5 scientists. [There'd be more if there were more turkimp.]
"The question is how do we use all these gems?" the human looks at the village zoning plans again, "I like those mansions and all, but they use hardly any gems compared to, well-" he gestures at the pile of over two dozen thousand gems they've gathered, "-that! And still a lot of wood and lumber."
"I think there's something," the yellow one sighs, "I wish I knew more."
Quite some time later, after they're done looting that route for equipment plans, the trimps are again advancing through Zone 10, and he hears it.
"Tai?" the grey one wonders.
"Where are you going?" the yellow one asks.
"To the farm," the human answers.
"Whatever for?" the red one seems exasperated.
"Shijou?" the grey one sighs, then looks at the fighting front. It's been around long enough to remember, "Shijou!"
"You guys already get so much to eat this doesn't do you much good," the human explains.
3h32m33s: L11 112/35/78 rand sea, dropped from Z11c6 with disband, 4.
"What's wrong?" the red one asks.
The human comforts one of the wounded. Once trimps start into a zone fight, they have to finish before they bleed out. He's really bothered making them desert in front of that second turkimp. "They had a lot left in them," he sighs, rubbing his eyes, "but we can't keep that much dead turkimp at once, we have to leave it alive to use up all of this one."
"Shijou," the grey one presents a note, "We need this map right away, anyway. Don't worry about it, Tightniks."
"Tightniks?" he looks at the grey one, "Is that me? How do you know?"
"Tai," the grey one points at the top of the human's left breast pocket.
"Ah, crud," the yellow one curls its tail around in front of itself as trimps do when they're embarrassed, "Is that really a name tag?"
The human hadn't even noticed it since the green flash blew up his memory as he was stepping out of the ship.
4h04m22s: Block (sub-8h AP is only 0.3%), taking it, 504 pop, 9.8s RC with Z10/24.
It's a pretty thick book about using shields for block instead of hit points. The pad has the stats analysis. Sh3-1 is only giving us 9% of our hit points. Turning to his trimp scientists, he says, "It seems to me to be worth it."
"Let's," the yellow one nods.
"Shijou," it hands him a note, "It scales badly, but that won't matter for a long time. I think there's a way to undo it before it matters."
"Doing it." The human takes out his pad and starts scanning.
4h29m05s: L14 rand moun 137/26/80 is really good for a lo-hi-med. 4h30m52s: Hotels.
"Ah," the yellow one says, "I knew there was something. That must be it."
5h08m09s: L15 lo-hi-hi rand gard 129/28/82 (just got explorers). 5h09m32s: Picked up Wall.
"Dam," the human says.
"Damn?" the red one chuckles.
"No," the human says, "Earthen wall dam; it's a thing that makes artificial lakes by holding rivers back."
"Lakes?" the yellow one asks, "Rivers?"
"Oh yeah," the human says, "This planet doesn't have enough rain for those..."
5h48m21: Leaving Wall from about c70 to fetch Tion Z15.
"You can't resume the map from the same point if you start another," the human reads the grey one's note.
"We can go back to the same point on that route if we hold there and finish Zone 15, right?" Tightniks asks.
"Shijou!" it seems to be saying yes.
"Yes," the yellow one adds, "but we're out of Series III upgrades, and you need a fresh map route to start up Series IV."
"We should be okay," Tightniks says, "but if we have to start it over, I don't see that being a big deal." As they advance through the rest of Zone 15, Tightniks resumes his usual duties at the research desk instead building and running traps like he was before.
The trimps seem hopeful at this decision.
5h49m10s: Fresh turkimp. 5h50m16s: Zone 16, 1071 pop, 13.4s RC with Z15/75, 13m43s turkimp (skel in c1.)
"Z:16 Seriously? Another Blimp so soon?"
"So," Tightniks lowers his bee nickels and looks at the red one, "is it going to be boss fights at the end of every zone from now on?"
"Hmm," the red trimp looks up past the human at some random rock spire or cloud.
"Well?" the human persists.
"Yup," he says.
"Hmph," Tightniks grabs a Sw3-1 of the rack and advances towards the front, "Before then, we have another Mister Titanium."
"What does he like about skeletimps?" the red one asks the grey one as the human marches off.
"Shijou?" the grey one seems just as confused by that.
"He's not going back to the ship, and he's not getting himself killed," the yellow one smiles, "so I'll take it."
5h58m32s...
"Hey guys, go for the mortar!" the human suggests to his 75 fighting trimps in the Wall's boss fight.
"I can tell from your bedtime stories that you're used to the artillery in that other place," the yellow one gripes, "but fighting works differently here, there's no artillery."
And the human instantly collapses laughing, the scientists a little worried he might have injured himself in the planet's severe gravity. But he's okay, at least physically, "Mortar is the stuff between the bricks, fellas. That's is a brickimp, right?"
5h59m18s: Wall, 1076 pop, 13.3s RC, 1% AP for sub-8h finish, first L16 roll good 156/35/84 moun, 10 for the metal.
Beyond the Wall was a more edenic section of the trimpolis ruins, doubling the production of the lumberjacks. The trimps are actually really happy with the mode of all of the laborers moving between the three big jobs, along with the turkimp, except for the foremen specialized at leading the job. It isn't enough to boost their productivity, but the human goes to them with trays of sandwiches.
6h06m52s: 50 map run 0.3% AP...
6h19m13s: Zone 17, 1141 pop, 16.0s RC with Z16/94, no turkimp.
"Z:17 You climb a large cliff and look out over the new Zone. Red dirt, scorched ground, and devastation. Is that a Dragimp flying around out there?!"
"Hmm," the human surveys the new zone with his bee nickels, "Looks like crap. Any ideas?"
"You're the idea man," the yellow one groans.
"Set the map flag," he puts his bee nickels away, "We'll run a depth for practice and to load up on gems for more hotels."
"Righto," the red one gets to work.
6h44m34s: First DCP. (Draglimp Care Package; I refuse to call it a tribute.)
"Oh," the human says, "It's tame now, so it brings back gems in exchange for food?" He looks at his gaping scientists, "That's what it looks like, huh? Guys? Yo!"
"Tai..." the grey one sighs.
Draglimp, the dragimp imprinted on Tightniks, lands beside the human, drops some gems at his feet, and accepts some scratching behind its horns before diving into the food bowl.
"You tamed a dragimp???" Grey's note says.
"Well," the yellow one huffs, "I guess that happened."
8h18m53s: L20 depth of 154/27/79.
"Mapping up here?" the red one half closes one eye and tilts his head.
"Yeah," the human says while fitting together the depth map fragments, "With the coordination book not right at the end, we have an extra mark of coordination to take advantage of. Let's take our housing up to 2000 or so, shall we?"
"Okay," the yellow one says from a pile of logs, "What's all the wood for?" They had been collecting it for days now.
"The series upgrades follow a rather specific pattern," Tightniks explains, "Just on the other side of this blimp is Zone 21, where we should be able to find the Shield series V, right?"
"Shijou!" the grey one nods.
8h56m17s: 1% AP for 100 map runs, leaving it, 1751 pop, 24.8s RC with Z20/232. 8h56m54s: Zone 21...
"Ooooookay," Tightniks growls, "There is something off about this thing."
"Shijou?" the grey one looks at the yellow one with concern about their human starship pilot friend.
The human stoops, picks up the little green gem on the ridge between Zone 20 and 21, looks at it, huffs, and asks, "Any idea where this comes from?"
"Err..." the red one seems hesitant to say, "I think you made it."
"Really?" the human huffs, "How could that be?" Then he tosses it at Red, "See if anything reacts to it. It might be radioactive, so we should take turns to minimize exposure."
"Really?" Red's holding it now, "What makes you say that?"
"Because I'm pissed off for no reason I can figure out," the human says, "I think it's coming from that."
"Frags," the red one says quickly, "I think it's arranging a route. You're good with maps," it tosses the gem to the grey scientist.
"Shijou," the grey one says hopefully, and has a map drawn within a few minutes. [Whether it looks like the one in Puchim@s 1x61 is anyone's guess. That one annoyed me as well as Chihya.]
9h02m37s: L21 moun first roll was a decent 160/26/84. 9h21m00s: Starting run 5 of that map...
Tightniks had taken his anger out on some food and wood to build about 8000 traps. Now he's leaning against a rock spire in his increasingly tattered uniform. A nap begins, perhaps unintentionally.
Wild trimps are examining the pile, finding it unwelcoming, and also finding no place in the town, just mill about. It looks like they want to help.
"Ku?" it's a blue trimp, probably a farmer waiting for stuff to grow, climbs up on the rock spire the human is leaning against, starts patting him on the head, "Ku. Ku ku." [Puchim@s Chihya.]
9h23m09s: Still working that lap...
Tightniks wakes up from that nap, and the grey one is standing there. "Shijou," it says with a note of concern, although not much of one. The note it holds says, "It wasn't me."
"Oh, what wasn't you, buddy?" He stretches out a bit, feeling somewhat refreshed. It feels like somebody washed his face and hair while he was sleeping.
The grey one is also holding a small mirror, apparently broken off from a larger mirror and with the sharp edges filed down to make the edges safe.
The human takes it from the grey trimp and holds it in front of his face to discover that somebody has bound up all his hair into about twenty little pigtails. He touches them with his other hand to confirm. "Eh, whatever." He hands the mirror back and goes back to sleep. [Puchim@s Koamimami.]
9h30m08s: The following run...
"He's not throwing stuff every which way yet," the yellow one whispers to the red one, watching the human snoozing with his pad on his knee.
"You remember that, too?" the red one asks.
"'Remember'?" the yellow one turns to face the red one, "I s'pose that's better than imagining it."
"I remember it, too," the grey one says via a playing card sized note.
"If we're stuck in a time loop," the yellow one sighs, "maybe this cycle will be different."
"Tai..." the grey one admires him for a moment. Then thumbs in the direction of the mountain, "Heh, Shijou!" it laughs.
9h35m58s: Run 8, c9 of that map.
The scientists nap and take notes, and meditate and take notes, and draw stuff. The grey one often storyboards for the other nine because it's the best at drawing stuff. They have come up with a list, and most probably "order" (they're debating whether their ranking means "order" (sequence of things happening over the various loops) or "frequency" (what proportion of previous loops they have happened in). But they've come up with this, from first (or perhaps most often) to most recent (or perhaps least often):
- The ship crashes (they're pretty sure that happens every loop) - The human builds huts - The human teaches some of his trimps to speak and do science - The human builds houses - The human makes maps - The human builds mansions - The human blows up and gets himself killed somewhere around Z17 to Z21, often on a dragimp - The human only recently/occasionally builds hotels - The human only recently/rarely tamed a dragimp - The human only recently/rarely maps the Dimension of Anger
They're all agreed that that they have never finished the Dimension of Anger. What they are not all agreed on is that they've never done this conference to figure out whether they're in a time loop or what that might mean. [See also Star Trek: The Next Generation episode "Cause and Effect" ...which was sort of a time loop but they weren't going back in time. It's very interesting, but its meta makes no sense - no one ever went looking for the Bozeman in 80 years? No one who went looking for the Bozeman also got stuck? No one noticed the passage of time outside the little area of space where the not-quite-a-time-loop was happening? Errr... sci-fi writers, don't be half-assed about your time loops, lmao! Be like Harold Ramis- ...what am I saying?? (That would be Groundhog Day, which grafted a time loop into a romcom; there are no other sci-fi elements. But it was a full-blown time loop and not half-assed like "Cause and Effect".)]
9h54m06s: Dropped from Z21c95...
I think it would be a bad idea to bypass that green area, as much as I'd rather not face it. Both his domesticated trimps, which are breeding up a new group of fighters, and the wild trimps he has decided just now not to open the traps for, stare at him and point in that direction. He shoulders a huge Shield V-3 and grabs an Mace IV-2 as well and announces, "We're doing it." Thus equipped, he marches off into the Dimension of Anger.
10h27m53s: Taking Pi4-2; recently had taken Pa4-2...
The group at the front had expired, and the snimp in DoAc95 glares at the advancing colony of trimps, which had halted only because of it. It refuses to counterattack the vulnerable colony and its human, instead snorting and huffing, waiting for the next bunch of 232 fighting trimps to come in range.
Tightniks runs along the line of traps, releasing the recently tamed trimps, singing a song that he doesn't remember the meaning of, that he doesn't remember was crafted by an ethnically Chinese guy out of an African language, and later mastered by two caucasians over the internet before they ever met in person. "Baba yetu yetu uliye, mbinguni yetu yetu amina..." because it just happened to be stuck in his head. [Because the Doylian author decided on a whim to. Christopher Tin got it into Civilization IV and at the time (2010 July), I made the best video for it on YouTube, which got subsequently blown to shreds when Peter Hollens and Malukah re-recorded the song from scratch in their own voices and instruments in 2014, pity with no English translation, the purpose of my video.]
Noticing the last batch of metal he needs coming out of the furnace, he waves the waiting grey scientist to fire up the forge [to use the term properly and not as the game does], for it was time to wrap up the forging dies for the Spetum IV, Mark 2 pike heads.
"Shijou!" the grey one cheers, setting aside a snack that looks like maybe ramen, and starts jumping up and down on the bellows handle.
It takes a while for the human to chip out the tip in the two halves of the forging die, and then polish it, and then heat it up in the forge, and then quench it, inspect it, and put it into service crafting thousands of new pike heads for the fighting trimps.
But only one second passed on the map frame clock (10h27m54s) four cells behind that snimp, in the case being brooded over by this huge, and if it's honest, rather concerned megablimp.
10h35m45: Portal PB, 45 He, 4.247 He/hr, 1891 pop, 22.7s RC with Z20/232, no turkimp.
The last head of the map's boss monster goes limp as one of the fighting trimps' mace heads bounces of it, and the huge thing settles on its tail, resting on the package that seems to be the prize of this map. And there's a popping sound, and then something mechanical.
Is that a scroll compressor? Tightniks looks at the package. The deflating monster's lifting envelope material drapes over everything underneath it. "Red, Shijou!" he snaps and points, "roll up that side of it. Keep this part from sucking down on the extractor nozzle!"
All ten of the scientists jump in, literally, pushing the gas in the bag towards the compressor. Tightniks as well, rolling up the front.
Until he kicks, and nearly trips over, a smaller package that might be the explanation for the reason why the center of the monster's defense seemed to be a little away from the big package he could see. It's in the right place, he realizes. He gets it uncovered and reads stenciled-and-sprayed block letters on it:
"DT TIME PORTAL / THIS SIDE DOWN"
Perhaps the Dimension of Anger is so named because of the rage suddenly rising up in Tightniks' throat. It isn't so much as the free-floating aggression suddenly has an answer, there is definitely a fresh batch of rage and anger as he grips the nearest Mace IV, Mark 3 with both hands and gets it over his shoulder, its target obviously this object, anger at the realization he screams at the top of his lungs, "We are stuck in a mutha FAH-king time loop!!" His swing begins. [Tightniks almost never cusses, unlike Snugniks.]

Hi, I am attempting to plan a trip to Ireland for this August for our family of 4 (our children are 13 and almost 10.) So far we have plane tickets, so we are definitely going there, but I'm feeling a bit stuck. We haven't booked hotels or tours yet.
Reading guide books makes it sound easy to get around in a rental car, but we don't drive. So I am trying to figure out how we can mix day trips and trains and possibly hiring a driver for a day or two, depending on the cost.
Is this a somewhat reasonable plan? I need to flesh out our days but here is a sketch:
Day 1: Sunday - Arrive in Dublin airport around 9am. Transfer to hotel (TBD) to drop off bags and take a city walking tour (either self-guided or with a guide) plus early dinner and early bedtime
Day 2: Monday - Trinity College and Book of Kells, other sights
Day 3: Tuesday - Visit Newgrange/Knowth, returning to Dublin to sleep. It appears there are a number of day tour operators that would take us from Dublin to Newgrange and back.
Day 4: Wednesday - Train to Galway - likely the 9:25am arriving in Galway 11:52am LUNCH - where? (Sometimes I feel like we lurch from meal to meal on vacation but good food keeps everyone happy!) Get 4:45pm bus to Rossaveel to hop on ferry: https://www.aranislandferries.com/time-tables/inismor and spend night on Inis Mor.
Day 5: Thursday - Spend day on island until late afternoon ferry departure. Question: is it better to return to Galway or take the ferry to Doolin. Both options say they go by the Cliffs of Moher... Thursday night sleep where???
And ladies and gentleman, here is where I am stuck. We read a lot about how great Dingle is, and would love to visit. It looks like getting here by public transportation whether from Galway or Doolin would eat an entire day of the trip. In a car it takes approximately 3 hours. Would a taxi company make a trip like that in Ireland, or does one need to book a private driver? Ideas on expense? OR, would there be a trip from Galway or Doolin to Dingle (e.g. a hop-on-type small bus tour?) I googled but only found "day trip to Dingle from Dublin" for example.
And after Dingle, our dream would be to go to Skellig Michael, which seems to also require a private car to get to either Portmagee ferries or Bunnavalla Pier in Caherdaniel, where some other ferry operators are based.
Lastly, if time allows, we'd love to swing by Waterford for a day on the way back to Dublin for our return flight. We have the below time to visit Dingle and Skellig Michael and maybe Waterford... I've left the days blank because it isn't clear to me how we could get around and how long to spend in each place.
Day 6: Friday -
Day 7: Saturday -
Day 8: Sunday -
Day 9: Monday -
Day 10: Tuesday -
Day 11: Wednesday -
Day 12: Thursday - depart on late afternoon flight from Dublin
Thanks in advance for helpful tips and insight and practical advice!

**I am NOT OP. u/ThrowRAexnocustody is the OP of this story.**
Trigger Warnings: Physical abuse, emotional abuse, drug use
AITA for telling my daughter's biological mother that she doesn't deserve to call herself a mom?, Posted October 14th, 2023
I (26F) am engaged to my fiance (33M) Brandon and have grown close with his daughter Lucy (4F). Lucy's biological mother Natalie (30F) has lost all physical and legal rights to her daughter due to neglecting her severely when Lucy was an infant, not to get into great detail but Natalie is addicted to opioids and Lucy had a withdrawal period.
Lucy and I have gotten close as I have dated my fiance for almost 4 years, Lucy was born 9 months before I came into Brandon's life, we met at the hospital as Lucy had some major health issues in her infancy due to Natalie and I have a chronic illness that pushes me into pancreatitis. She now calls me Mama even though neither I nor my fiance asked her to do so. I read her bedtime stories and I'm helping her learn to add and subtract.
During a get-together for Brandon's birthday I hosted at his house, Natalie showed up with her new boyfriend neither were invited. She tried to give Lucy a hug but Lucy didn't know her. She came to Brandon and me instead and told us a stranger had come. She then asked me to make up her plate because Natalie began to throw a tantrum in the middle of the party shouting about how she was going to take Brandon to court and because she's the mom she'll win full custody because she deserves to be in her daughter's life. During this time Brandon took Lucy inside because she had started crying because she was scared.
I admit I snapped. I told her she has no right to call herself a mother because she abandoned Lucy to go get high and sleep around. She hurt my baby so bad that she's 4 and needs to go to therapy and has physical health issues because of her. That she refuses to put her baby first and at best she's an egg donor. I told her to get the fuck out of my house and never come back. She wailed all the way back to her boyfriend's car.
I admit I think I went too far. I know that drug addiction is a disease and people who suffer from substance abuse disorder need help, I think I went too far saying she was at best an egg donor. Brandon said I did nothing wrong. AITA?
Final Verdict: NTA
Relavent Comments:
NTA
MARRY then ADOPT Miss Lucy

As soon as we finalize our marriage!

NTA but prepare for worst:
It's concerning she got into your birthday celebration. Who told her about the time and place? Who opened the doors? Talk with a lawyer about all the possibities.
Ex-mom is delusional and selfish. There are two most probable outcomes: your extreme and emotional reaction knocked some sense into her that she has zero chance to make it work. Or, worse, she will retaliate and fight for custody just to prove to herself you were not right and she is not a bad mother.

I think my STBMIL told Natalie's mom. As Lucy has a relationship with her bio grandma.

Sounds like it's time for a talk. This may have been a slip up or you may have a leak.

It was a slip up. She posted about the "Last BBQ of the year" And "Happy Birthday!" on Facebook.

YNTA. This person showed up uninvited at your fiance's birthday party and became unhinged? If it happens again, call the police so it is documented. I know she is an addict but she has no right just showing up. Have her parental rights been terminated? It sounds like she has lost her rights but there is thing called a TPR. Also if Brandon had an attorney he should let them know this happened. Let Lucy's therapist know too. You are in effect the mother and I hope you get married right away.

Yes they have been terminated.

OP, in your post you mentioned that Natalie has left the family to sleep around. Do you and your partner know for sure he is the bio father? I have no idea where you live and how family law works under these circumstances, but maybe just make sure you are on the safe side? All the best for you and your little family.

Yes, to get full custody, Lucy and Brandon had to get a DNA test, he's the dad.

Why did he get an addict pregnant in the first place?

He did not know she was an addict at the time and she poked holes in their BC.

Super off topic but right?! And in 9 months he found someone else to essentially become a mom to her. Oof.

We were friends almost a year before we started dating, my room was the one next to the picu, and he'd pop in for a chat every so often when we were there at the same time. He is a walking green flag who takes responsibility for his actions.

So instead of him being concerned for his kid... he comes and flirts with you. You were only 22 at the time and he was almost 30. Why are you fighting his battles for him? He should have been speaking with BM not you. Plus he had a new chick to raise his kid for him. You see green flags while I see red.

He walked into a quiet room while Lucy was getting a babygram... he looked exhausted so I let him play Assassin's Creed II on my console and we got talking. I told him I wasn't perma but was having an extended stay so if he wanted to talk to an adult about anything but babies my room was between the PICU and the Mat ward.

ESH. She shouldn't have shown up causing a scene unannounced. But she's not your baby. This was not your fight to have, it was your partners. You overstepped. You did go too far.
And I don't believe she has anything to do with a four year old being in therapy for something that you claim all happened when she was an infant.

She is in physical therapy for a hip dysplasia that she struggles with due to Natalie dropping her when she was an infant, she also has significant trauma from the severe neglect.

I'm not doubting the physical issue. I'm doubting the therapy. You said she lost custody for neglect when she was an infant were you hyperbolizing or was she actually under a year old?

No she has major emotional trauma from the extreme neglect. She has night terrors and she doesn't know how to explain them. It's play therapy for now, but will transition to talk later on.

NTA
You have been this child's mom. You.
Bio-mom cant just come rushing back into the child's life on a whim. She lost her rights (im assuming) by court decree. That means If she wants her rights back, she has to go through the courts and prove that she has changed. Obviously that hasnt happned yet.
You do have the right to react like you did, but since Lucy is in the dark as to who this other woman is, you would have better served her by just telling the woman to get out of your house. These comments may be used against you later with relatives and the courts, although who knows to what effect. Its still going to be a headache for you.
The judgmental comments (while I agree with them) are something you dont technically have the right to make yet. Once you are married and better established as a family unit, you will have a better leg to stand on. While I hope bio-mom gets her head out of her arse and gets her life together, I dont have much faith in that.
If you eventually are allowed to adopt, please do so, as that child needs you. Keep up with being the good mom that you are though.

Lucy is aware that she came from another mommy's tummy and that I'm an adult who loves her, and whom she considers her mom. She is aware that she has a biological mother and that I am not her bio-mom. She doesn't know her bio-mom was Natalie. If she got clean, Brendan and I would want Natalie to meet Lucy.

OK, thats fair. When this woman gets clean...
Well, you stepped up to be a mom when you didnt have to. Once you get married, that will solidify your right to claim being Lucy's mom. Time will build on that.
While I doubt that bio-mom will get clean in time to have any real relationship with the child, while she is still a child, I also worry how this woman will behave once she actually does get clean. Ive personally seen too many recovering addicts that have some bizarre notion that now that they are clean, all will be right with the world, they will get custody, and everything will go their way.
I hate being a pessimist.
Like I said though, keep being the good mom that you are to that girl. That is the positive, good, and right thing to focus on.

She is currently not attempting to get clean. - her mother told me this.

Not enough info. So where was the father when the mother was neglecting their child? And how has it come so that the father’s been dating you 9 month after a birth of his child?

He was in Kuwait. He's a veteran. My hospital room was right between the mat ward and the picu. So I was an adult who was alone surrounded by kids and I had my grandpa drop off my consoles at the hospital due to an extended stay, Lucy was suffering with health issues of her own. We met while I was playing Assassin's Creed II in one of the quiet rooms.

Ok. I saw your update where you had written about Lucy’s mother is no more than an egg donor. No, she is more than that. She gave birth. And by your logic you are no more than a caregiver. Lucy deserves to know who her mother is. And the best thing everyone around can do is to help her mother to stay in Lucy’s life. Her father decided to abandon his wife and mother of his child. When did her problems with drugs start? Before or after she gave birth? Like he had no idea what was going on? He did nothing about it. He decided it’s better to go bang another chick and have “a fresh start”. ESH.

She was never his wife. Her problems with drugs started before his deployment. And well before Lucy's birth. He did not know because she hid it from him. When he found out he had her rights severed.

Well I want to apologize. It's a triggering theme for me and now I understand why. You're going through a rough period, I wish you to stay strong. Taking a kid to a safer place is a good decision. Accepting a kid who is not blood related to you is not something everyone might do, and you're a good person. Calling a woman who gave birth an «egg donor» is awful, but people say even worse things being under emotions, your reaction is totally justifiable. I can imagine the Lucy's mother is suffering, but if she can't help herself, she doesn't deserve to be around indeed. You are not the asshole. I am.

You're not an asshole for a trauma response :) Happy Healing!

INFO: have you or the dad done anything to help this victim of the opioid epidemic or have you only demonised them and nothing else? Has the bio mother been given a chance to change and improve their life? How did they get addicted?
Just to clarify both Natalie and Lucy are victims of the opioid epidemic here. Being a victim doesn’t necessarily make the mother in anyway blameless, but how those around her acted and supported her is very important context here.

She started taking opioids at parties, not due to injury. I know because that was a piece of evidence that led to her rights being taken away.

UPDATE: AITA for telling my daughter's biological mother that she doesn't deserve to call herself a mom?, Posted October 20th, 2023
Original Post: https://www.reddit.com/AmItheAsshole/comments/1773wj4/aita_for_telling_my_daughters_biological_mothe
Hello everyone! It's been a very interesting few days and I have an update. So a few days after she crashed the party Natalie got arrested and arraigned for possession with intent to sell an illicit substance. From what her family says, the substance was cocaine, not opioids.
Lucy is doing fine and is loving her first year of kindergarten. My Fiance asked her if she wanted me to become her mama on paper. She said yes and now we're planning on doing family vows at our wedding. We are getting married on the 15th of December, as that is a very significant day for us (The day Brandon and I officially started dating.)
We have spoken to a lawyer and he has told us that even if Natalie got clean she would never get her rights to Lucy back, so we don't need to worry. I hope she gets clean in prison.
I want to add that even though I am not Lucy's biological mother, she will always be my daughter. And Brandon and I are not going to have children together so she'll be our only kid. Thank you so much for your support and your criticism!
**Reminder - I am not OP**

I'm sick and tired of my family with their advices and input. I'm a FTM and youngest in the family. Soooooo they treating me like idk how to raise a baby. I have a sister who have 2 kid and she kinda followed the old way of raising the kids. I don't have much memory of how she raised her kids but I did help take care both of them in bathing, changing, feeding and playing.
Their remark on me keeping my baby on a schedule for nap and bedtime is me not wanting to watch the baby becuz when they had babies their bedtime was like 10pm. As for my baby, bedtime is no later than 7:45pm. Then keep saying I'm forcing the baby to nap 3 time a day is too much and that wake window is not real. This really put me off saying I don't want to watch my baby cuz I let them sleep early or nap too much. What the different if she wake up early anyway for me to care for.
Then my baby is on the smaller size and their treating me like I'm not feeding the baby. She 6.5month now and have started on solid. I try to feed baby around 2 meals a day and their expecting 3-4 meals. I also do 25-30oz of formula for baby. Stating I'm not seasoning baby food, when salt is not recommended for baby. I see wat I give and do is an appropriate amount with what is recommended.
Nagging me on how I dress baby. It texas heat! Why would I put baby in 3 layer? With hat, sock, and mittens. Why expecting to give baby a pacifier if she don't want it and sleep without needing help from us or it.
I'm a person who take advice from doctors and I believe in science about baby. So whenever I explain them why I do something for baby becuz they ask. They think I'm being a snob and trying to say I think I raise baby better than their. I have never state that but I'm starting to feel it.
Why is it so wrong to them the way I raise my kid just becuz I believe in science and research on recommendations for baby.