Meiosis online games

I've honestly been out of the perfume game for a few years. It's been a crazy hot summer here, and I've been wearing nothing but extremely light citrus scents. The cold weather is finally here and I'm super excited to buy a "real perfume". Some ones I've liked in the past: Alien, Black Orchid, Paco Rabanne Black XS for Her OG, Roberto Cavalli Nero Assoluto, Lancôme Idôle Nectar. There's more but either got discontinued or I can't remember.
Some notes I love: lavender, rose, jasmine, amber, vanilla, cocoa, incense. Vibe: gothic, mysterious, comforting. Dislike: anything too sweet and cloying.
I'm in Australia and it's pretty difficult to get samples here. I'd love a sample set. I buy mostly online due to my crippling anxiety. Especially when it comes to sniffing different perfumes in store.
Have really been wanting to try YSL Libre. However now there's different flankers and I'm so confused.
I absolutely love Lust Twilight Body Spray too.
What are your cooler weather faves? 💜🖤🌿🌹🥀🍂

Looking for friends to hang out with and chat with daily. Into gaming and anime.
Some games I enjoy playing is Minecraft, Phasmophobia, Final Fantasy, Destiny 2 and any kinds of RPG/FPS games.
Some anime I enjoy watching is Naruto, SAO, Solo Leveling, yugioh.
Down to talk about anything and everything. Would love to have someone where we can be silly with, talk daily, share interests and be there for each other. Always online. Not looking for a one day/short chat, wanting long term genuine friendships. I use discord to chat. No ghosters please 🙂 18+

Successor : u/Intel81994
Hi,
I first found this subreddit and Neville's works in 2018 so I thought I'd share my success/experiences.
I've never posted here, only lurked... daily. I often see people post tiny wins in here like manifesting a test result or a few hundred dollars. I don't see many huge wins except occasionally, or multi-year life changing creations.
Well, I'm not where I want to be bc my goals have gotten a lot bigger, but I've come a long way and finding this work in 2018 changed my life so I want to share with you how.
Not to discourage, but small wins are nothing compared to the deep life changes and incredible abundance you can create in knowing who you really are - just think - there are people out there, several, who own $10M+ houses, multi-millionaires, many came from nothing.
I'm not saying that's the only thing worth striving for or even the source of joy, of course. But my point is anything you want, someone else out there has done it, they are just humans like myself and you.
So here's how my life turned around since 2018 and what I created. The HOW I did so is no different than what you already read on this sub every day.
Neville has been my favorite teacher and this is the MAIN sub I have read over the last few years. I own all of his books and have read them several times.
I regard his methods as most influential for me. This may come off as some motivational story but truth is I use Neville's methods daily and always try to understand and control my beliefs to grow.
Here is how my life changed completely after DOING the work:

• MONEY/TRAVEL : I went from -50k in debt running my own online fitness coaching business at my lowest point not knowing how I would pay rent (long story but I was young and not skilled enough in business at this time to really build a team and 7 figure business like I wanted),

to acquiring amazing skills being an intrapreneur working in a small startup online with a terrific mentor (I manifested this exact position with SATS), traveled the world a crazy amount in the exact places I had wanted to and met a ton of cool people (SATS), over 27 countries now, and grew my net worth to over 250k from 2018-2021.
To my current goals, this is really nothing now and I now surround myself with people doing a ton more than me. So I'm not preaching here, it's just levels to the game right.
I now work professionally in the crypto industry, but also have skills and knowledge to a few types of online businesses in the consulting & marketing space, as well as make money from markets/trading, which is a great vehicle because there are effectively no limits.
I can live anywhere I want, have plenty of cushion and money to live mostly how I want (have larger goals now), have time freedom as well, and most of all, love growth and feel great striving for more. I did SATS to get my current gig.
I've also been trading the last 2 years and no it's not easy, in fact you're competing against algorithms and the best minds in the world so the learning curve is quite steep.
Trading is not easy money, but the potential is there. Besides, trading is just one vehicle, it's not value-additive to the market like businesses are, so I believe it's best used in conjunction with a business/job, and investing longer term is better.
Anyway I turned <40k into ~350K in crypto, and a separate stock portfolio last year.
And yes a lot of that crypto growth was market timing and luck with everything going on, monetary policy and all, and I know people who turned less into several million and also plenty who got liquidated and lost millions. I still spent a lot of time and skill to create that, point is I created all of it in various forms.

• FITNESS/HEALTH: I achieved a more fit and better body than 98% of men have. This was a result of hard work plus these methods and was in 2018 when I decided to undergo a bodybuilding prep for a photoshoot. Great size, leanness, abs, I had been lifting for years but never gotten this in shape.

It was not easy, but I looked incredible, and the exact city/water background scene I had visualized for the photos happened. You can scroll to my IG posts from early 2018 for pics proof.
My health is impeccable and I've for sure made other physical changes, and I think I somehow changed my gf's looks to become better over time too. She was always quite cute though. I'm still very much in shape but now do yoga daily for last few years, as well as lifting.

• LOCATION/LIVING: I manifested the EXACT view I used to visualize in the center of my major city, with a gorgeous view of the ocean and city both, for a great price and have lived here for last 3 years now. In a luxury high rise. I can see ships and yachts right outside my balcony every day. It's literally grander than I even knew to imagine just 5 years ago.
  
• MORE FINANCE: Over the last 2 years my investments and more were doing so well sometimes - not always - that I often was able to have some months making 20-40k, point is I was not worried about work.
  

I also believe parallel realities are real and I used to visualize Bitcoin going to 50k back in 2019 when it had stayed below <10k for 2 years. This was not all due to bitcoin, but rather all sorts of investments, but yes crypto as well.
Some was luck, some was skill and work. All was my creation. I also got quite decent at trading and managing a portfolio that I not only managed to publicly call the exact day of the market TOP in november 2021 but also sniped the bottom in July. Intuition plus knowledge.
So I kept this money, it is not bleeding out in my portfolio with the market. I've devoted a LOT into mastering this craft but again, self concept and Neville helped.
I got hacked for 60k-70k a few months back and chose to give it new meaning and manifested a career change to crypto industry, landing a position making over 10k per month (I'm not happy with this at my current standards of income, but I'm grateful), that I am growing to 20k per month of active income now with other streams.
What's interesting in my recent career manifestation is I decided I want a position that basically pays me to do what I already do (I was independently researching and managing a multi-6 figure crypto portfolio... over a quarter million dollars combined money that I was managing. )
I now get paid a full time 6 fig salary to do nothing extra from what I was already doing and barely work on the actual job with plenty of time for other stuff.
I just decided it was done and that's it. Also of course it's remote... knowing what I know, I will only consider remote jobs (never worked in a physical office and I've actually never had a w2 job before this, always doing sales and stuff or my own thing).
I have been working on increasing my standard to 25k per month minimum of active income generation. Had a lot of ideas come through. I’m just not the type to have a job I think but I have to figure out what I can build again.
Compared to who I want to be at a later date that’s also nothing much. Again, levels to the game.
Now also working on growing a business in this space. This hack event was pretty traumatic but I now see how I 100% manifested it. And I can choose to also create something far greater out of the event now.
With every job I've ever had, I've never worked in an office. I've only ever been remote or online because this is the only thing I was willing to accept. Being a digital nomad has been my norm since I graduated college.
Be specific in what you want and do not settle.
I went to a top 5 US public university and even manifested myself to lead a large pre-med club on campus (I was a pre med student) before I knew Neville. I'm now very glad I chose to go my own route instead of medicine for several reasons beyond scope of this post but anyway.

• SP: Manifested my SP (gf) back in 2018 and we have a great relationship going on 6 years now (together since 2016). I focus more on self love and feeling I AM God rather than seeking it externally. My consciousness and inner connection is my source of sustenance.
  
• Honestly there are so many other crazy little things I can't possibly keep track. Every day I have synchronicities like crazy still. I don't give them much meaning but just take it to mean that I am aligned.
  

My best mental model/tips

• Delude yourself into knowing that imagination is MORE real than the 3d. The 3d is 'old news.' Meaning it's a shadow world. The real creation is happening in your imagination, and there is a time lag in this physical world.

Live in your imagination and tune out anything that does not serve keeping you in an optimal state where you feel in control. The more you focus on things that are meant to distract you or displease you, which state do you create from?

• I do SATS during the day, works fine for me, I don't think it matters much if day/night, but you need to do it. Follow a guided hypnosis session to get deeper into trance first if it helps.
  
• Act and trust deeply that life is leading you to what you want, and the meaning you give to events is literally what molds your future. Choose empowering meanings. Stop being a victim.
  

Make a resolve to never think of yourself as a victim of forces out there, the economy, evil people, whatever it is. You want to control your reality then act like it internally.

• Make a daily routine checklist and stick to it so you internally feel in control of your reality. Mine is: SATS or revision, meditate or breathwork, EFT or writing, cold shower, no phone in the morning, wake at 6am, and of course I exercise daily in some form. I use a spreadsheet to make sure I hit my routines for the day so I don't be a victim but rather stay in control. This is critical for me.
  
• As long as you occupy the realms of consciousness that you want, the result WILL come via downloads and hunches and thoughts, and insane physical things will happen that will 'seem like it would have happened anyway' so don't worry about the how.
  

Random Musings
The thing with manifesting is we sometimes take a passive route and wait for things to happen to us (and sure this is fine and still works), but think- if you don't grow your mental, emotional, skills container to deal with large amounts of money, or a team, or skills to sell and market and manage money... if you suddenly get 500K or 1M, how are you going to hold on to it?
If you lack personal power and execution skills, say you suddenly win 5M from the lottery, do you have the skills to keep it and make decisions at a level that can fluctuate several millions? It's stressful and requires thinking completely differently.
You have to 'stress test' your consciousness and expand your container.
I know that because I got hacked (stolen) ~70k it means nothing because the version of me who makes multi-7 figures a year deals with fluctuations of multi-6 figures in his portfolio all the time, it's part of the game. and I HAVE dealt with 6 figure fluctuations in my portfolio before this hack so it wasn't super new in that sense.
You know time is not real, it's all happening now, Creation is already finished, so you should also know that the way to 'hack' time is making decisions from a place of the future version of yourself you already are.
Make a commitment to stop playing small and settling for crumbs. Why would you get hung up on the one limited way your ego thinks that abundance has to manifest in your life, or love, instead of just feeling the emotions themselves, knowing it's done, and letting your life color it in in grander ways than you could have imagined.
Funny little manifestations and things happen literally every day that I just take it as reflections of me being in my creative power.
Something crazy/funny that happened was on our last trip, I told my girlfriend 'hey, how funny and weird would it be to see a parrot meowing?' - then next day we sit at a cafe and there is a parrot in a cage outside, meowing loudly. The most bizarre manifestation, I didn't even intend for it, just asked hey would it not be funny. Things like this happen so often, I can't keep track.
There is nothing new to learn. Just do the techniques and do self care rituals and get lost in your work. Feel the feeling of utter abundance and freedom now and it will happen.
We live in an advanced economy with the internet, it has never been easier to start or fund a business compared to even 50 years ago (see interest rates), distribution has never been easier, so if you know these tools, why would you not create the biggest dream you can imagine? Why settle for a free $200?
I realize there are levels people go through however so I don't mean to belittle, but now that I have been through so much and grown, I know there is nothing separating myself from multi millions and VC's and creators of large companies except belief, work, and time in this reality.
I have the knowledge, belief, and skills to not need a job if I don't want one. I can instead offer something to the market and be independent.
I'm telling you this stuff works and is sustainable. You can be as specific as you want and get whatever you want, and trust that with the turns life takes you through, it is a BRIDGE meant to turn you into the person to get and sustain what you say you want. Decide it and it is so.
I am someone who is a first generation American immigrant, my parents moved to the US from India when I was 5 and we had very little here. I grew up 'lower' middle class, and didn't have the best money programming from parents, but I always did well in school.
I KNOW I am going to be the first multi millionaire in my family. It's all in how you think about yourself/self concept and the work you do from that mindset. Do actions and shift your environment in accordance with who you want to be.
I always splurge on self care now and do things like fly business class or pay more for a better room because that's who I internally am. Just find a way to produce more and let it flow instead of shrinking yourself to be someone you’re not in your 4D
I don't try to scrimp and penny pinch, I let money flow. Even though getting stolen 70k was traumatic, oh well, I chose to give it a better, empowering meaning and my reality shifted.
That's all I have to say. Do the work. Stop procrastinating with learning. All the teachers, scripture, it's all the same Truth at the core. Learning is fine because you learn different mental models at different points of your life but you need to do the work.
I've been fortunate to not only have explored TONS of teachers and books in this realm, you name it I've probably read it or have a copy, I've also HAD mentors and WORKED directly under multi millionaires older and more experienced than me who know this work very well and knew Neville specifically, and it's the real deal. I did sales for someone in the online coaching space was was very well off and had decades of success and spoke of Neville very often, it was really cool.
Proof of the Law
I don't know what more proof you need that the Law is real. All religions throughout eternity have known this, Neville just distilled the same Truth through his own methods that work really well in my opinion and I personally love his interpretation of scripture.
The most successful people in the world are usually consciously (and some unconsciously) doing these same actions. Just do the work and focus on it coming from a good place of knowing that it's done. You don't need to know HOW but you just need to know the plane is going to somehow land one day.
I just come back to Neville every time, because his methods are simple and philosophies work well for how I think. I've done tons of psychedelic mushrooms over the years which luckily made me very open to this sort of thinking, before that I was very rigid and too '3d scientific' minded in my thinking. Keep in mind there is actually nothing 'unscientific' about the Law... modern science has its own limitations in that we cannot measure many things.
What used to be called magic in years past is now under the realm of science right? I'm not saying I don't value logic and science... I have a science degree from a top 5 university.
I'm just saying your ego mind which wants to keep you stuck and surviving uses the excuse of logic and science when that's actually not the full scope of how reality works, we are incredibly limited in our conscious understanding of reality.... we don't even know what we're doing here on a floating rock in infinite space and we can hardly see much of the light spectrum as it is.
So remember that when your ego tries to believe in your limitations and the 3d reality only. You being here is magic that even the most advanced science does not know the answer to. Do scientists know fundamentally why there is something at all instead of nothing?
Anyway, one more thing is I've never been shy of making relatively bold and fast decisions, investing in a mentor (for business) and just generally betting on myself.
Because getting around people who think bigger than you and don't settle is a hack and it's worth every penny. There is a reason millionaires hang with other millionaires.
I'm not saying to cut people out of your life (unless toxic) but rather to seek proximity and get around winners or pay to join some mastermind in business or whatever you need to do to network in your realm.
Just last week I invested 7.5k for get into a network of high performing young male entrepreneurs just because I want a better network in real life and work on business tactics and execution. When I was 23 I invested 25k that I did not have at the time (I made it happen and earned it back) to get a business mentor. So I use all of this in combo with Neville's methods primarily. I really like revision method as well.
The act of DECISION literally creates a parallel reality and becomes the new bridge to your manifestation.

Yet there are older offices that have been there in the same city since the 1980s, and they "only" have like dozens of Google reviews.
How is that possible? Are these offices bribing their patients to write a positive review? It just seems so shady and rigged.
I wish we could do away with all these online reviews and just go back to purely "word of mouth". Nowdays, it's all just a silly, childish game that whoever has the most number of positive Google reviews must be the "best" dentist. That is clearly not true, yet many patients buy into that fallacy. 🙄

Hello, I will try to keep this brief as possible. I was always really into programming my whole life. Starting off with a passion for game-development, which led me to writing more complicated software and also learning a lot about programming 3D graphics. I sadly did not have the best parents growing up, and was homeless from ages 17-22. I did keep a laptop with me and programmed as much as I could during this time. At the age of 22, I met my biological father who turned out to be quite successful and saw my programming skills and offered to pay for me to go to college.
I obtained a 4 year degree in Computer Science, graduating a semester early with a 3.7GPA in Dec. 2023. I wasn't able to get any internships because the school/area I was in was highly militarized and it was only Department of Defense jobs. I, at the time, vaped weed, and took psychedelics, and you need to be stone colder sober for a long time to get a security clearance. Since then, I have quit all drugs except occasionally drinking. I still applied to jobs before graduating, had some interviews but couldn't get anything.
On top of this, me and my biological father had a falling out when I found out he had used my student grants and used them to pay for college and didn't mention it to me. I said well, didn't you say you would pay for my college? and he was being really weird about it, I think he got tired of me/paying for my college. He told me I was going to have a terrible life, I told him you are not my father do not talk to me, and moved out entirely on my own and haven't talked to him since.
I was able to during college, and post college, do a lot of contract work for a very small company on an irregular basis. I run a network of game servers on a large dedicated server that gives me programming experience, server management experience, networking and other experiences and makes me happy. I decided to move to Portland to live with my friends since I couldn't get a job in CS with my degree. I was just going to do contract work. I paid the lion's share of rent for the biggest room and helped out a lot with paying the move in costs, but one of the "friends" there ended up getting upset I worked online and felt I owed them more and started stealing from me so I had to leave after spending all of my savings (20k~ ish) on move-in fees, rent, and furniture.
I left suddenly when I got tired of being stolen from and being pressured to do things (I won't bore with details) and gave them my deposit and a month of rent before leaving to be nice (another $3k). They called me r**arded even after I left and gave them all of this, which really hurt. They were using me. I had to get rid of all my furniture I had spent thousands on because I just wanted to leave the toxic environment. These were my friends of many years.
I moved back in with my parents at 27, with a degree that I haven't been able to find any jobs with after almost 600 meaningful application to jobs I thought I would be a good fit for. I have barely any savings. I have only around $3k to my name currently. My parents are being very nice, but it is super depressing having to live with my parents. I feel like a complete failure. The contract work I had been doing is starting to dry up as the person I worked for is doing other business ventures and doesn't need my help anymore. My only thought is maybe I should pivot into working with foster kids (what I did before college) but I would be working long hours to make poverty wages. I feel stuck, and even though I have only been at my parents for a month my mental health has declined to the worst state it has been since when I was homeless. I need help.

Hi everyone! My name is Maryam and I represent Experis User Research Solutions. We specialize in assisting global leaders in creating accessible products through user feedback.
We are currently conducting an online gaming study and need your help! If you love playing games and want to be a part of cutting-edge research, click the survey link below to participate! Please let me know if you have any questions.
Location: Remote for 1.5 Hours
Incentive: $125 Gift Card
Ages: 8+
Link: Mole Gaming Study User Interviews

Hi everyone! My name is Maryam and I represent Experis User Research Solutions. We specialize in assisting global leaders in creating accessible products through user feedback.
We are currently conducting an online gaming study and need your help! If you love playing games and want to be a part of cutting-edge research, click the survey link below to participate! Please let me know if you have any questions.
Location: Remote for 1.5 Hours
Incentive: $125 Gift Card
Ages: 8+
Link: Mole Gaming Study User Interviews

I bought ffxiv way before I even knew what Steam was so I've always had it via Square Enix. It was the same thing with The Elder Scrolls Online. I bought that game through their own website but I was able to recently get it on Steam and seamlessly launch it thru Steam now without any extra steps beyond just buying it and installing it thru Steam.
Can I do the same with ffxiv? If I buy it on Steam, can I just launch it via Steam and play without any other steps?

I'm looking for a console for my family to play Minecraft on since the computer stopped working. I thought getting an old Xbox for cheap would be the best for us because we only play Minecraft but none of us know anything about gaming consoles. We dont need anything super fancy, we dont use any mods or shaders and we were wanting to get Minecraft bedrock. Ive asked my friends but they said they dont know and I've looked online for advice but I just wanted to make sure here before I buy one. Would an Xbox 1 500GB be able to run Minecraft bedrock decently? I was looking at an Xbox 1 500GB from cashies for NZ$119 or an Xbox 1s 500GB for NZ$169. Are those good prices or should I get from elsewhere? Thanks.

I had an update for windows 10 (now on 22H2 OS build 19045.4412) last night, I let my computer update and then shut down, I come to my computer today to play a game and Ubisoft connect wasn't launching, it was stuck in Initializing. I restarted, turned off IPv6, restarted, no luck. Saw someone say they can only get it to work if using a VPN, which is the same case for me. I don't see an option to revert back before the update. Can anyone help?

As the title says, I’m looking for anyone that’s willing to chat so we can get to know each other. I’m up for long term or short term convos! I’ve never really had online friends before, but I’d love to meet people from around the world.
I’m 24 and about to graduate from university. My hobbies include playing video games, watching shows/movies, hanging out with family and friends, and scrolling social media, sometimes a little too much lol.
Start off by telling me where you’re from or something interesting about yourself! Looking forward to meeting everyone :)

Hello, ask lang po ako ng offline or online games na storage friendly. Burn out na ako sa genshin, boring na ml for me and ayoko na dun sa King's Choice kasi pay to win literal. Need ko ng bagong pampalipas oras. TYIA

Recently updated OBS to 30.1.2 Windows 10 and this feature is now missing. I used it to only record audio from the game I'm playing and discard any other desktop audio.
The win-audio-capture plug-in isn't working for me for some reason, and I don't see any info online about this feature being removed. Guides on how to split audio from 2 months ago still show this feature.
Maybe I have the wrong version of OBS installed? Any other plug-in recommendations?

Hi! I apologize in advance for the long post. Trigger warnings for mentions of suicide, abuse, and eating disorders (the latter will be very mild).
I (19NB) have been with my girlfriend (20F) for about two and a half years; the relationship started out really well, both of us have prior trauma and struggle with mental health but we were kind of building off of each other for a long time. I went into it very emotionally constipated and as a horrific people pleaser; she went into it very insecure and super scared of me cheating. For the first year to year and a half it was a lot of lifting each other up, she'd reassure me that she'd listen to anything I needed and I reassured her that she would never have to worry about me cheating. There was more to it as well; at least on my side, I had a really bad eating disorder and she was the driving force for me to recover (she always reassured me that she liked my body, preferred for me to be healthy and that it didn't affect her perception of me, etc), was generally really sweet to me in the day-to-day, and was honestly everything I was looking for in a partner up until that point- I'm not someone that is attracted to people based on looks at all (either asexual spectrum or due to sexual trauma when I was a child- I'm also pretty sure I'm neurodivergent but never had the ability to get diagnosed; this will be important later) but she has been the one person I can really say I find attractive. I can think people look "cool" or "interesting" but she's genuinely so beautiful to me in a way that I've never felt for anyone else before. Personality-wise as well, she seemed perfect from the get-go- we always clicked in interactions, she'd reassure me without me asking for it and was interested in everything I had to say, etc. One big thing for me in the beginning was kind of silly but I feel like it's important for me to say; she plays games a lot, and every time we'd call each other and she'd get mad at whatever she was playing she would specifically lower her voice to talk to me. She could be halfway through yelling "what the fuck" at her computer but as soon as I said something to her she'd make herself sound as comforting as possible. This was a really big thing for me; my upbringing was very rough and both of my parents are prone to fits of anger (to the point of it getting physical very often) so I get very uncomfortable when people are visibly angry towards me. This is a big reason why I struggled with people-pleasing; as soon as someone gets upset with me I feel genuine terror, so I would try to avoid it as much as possible. I brought it up once and she said she didn't even realize she did it; the fact that she knew that about me and subconsciously made sure to try not to scare me was such a huge thing I loved about her. I was very used to people taking advantage of the fact that I was bad with boundaries, etc so having her act so comforting towards me with seemingly no ill intentions made me fall really deeply for her.
All of this changed last year- mostly in the summer but it kind of all started with her sleeping through our Valentines Day date. I couldn't even name everything she did but the main theme is that she let her insecurities get ahold of her. She would get upset with me over my clothing choices (stuff like shorts and a t-shirt in summer; it felt really reminiscent to victim blaming, like I must want sex if I wear shorts), literally just having friends, she'd snap at me all the time when she was slightly frustrated over her games (remember what I said earlier), literally anything became a reason for her to get horrifically angry at me. It was around this time that I decided to look into her prior dating history more and I learned pretty quickly that she used to be a serial cheater in different relationships (although her partners were really badly abusive and they cheated first, so I didn't think of it as a dealbreaker). She stopped reassuring me or speaking to me nicely, and also had a really big issue of doing things "back" (if I did anything that made her insecure, she'd do it 10x worse instead of talking to me about it). I mentioned having a side Reddit account once (this one) and she made a private Twitter and added all of her friends onto it except for me, and didn't tell me about it, just posted screenshots of it until I put 2 and 2 together. She also got upset after finding out that the person that groomed me is a trans girl (she's a trans girl too) and would ask me questions about whether I liked her (MY GROOMER!!!!!!!!) better. She'd do this stuff and then, when questioned about it, start agreeing with me and calling herself "undateable", etc, so I'd reassure her that she wasn't and ask her to "carry" the relationship for a bit since I thought she understood my side; by this I just meant being extra nice to me for a week or so (like when dudes get in a fight with their girlfriend and buy them flowers and talk to them more sweetly for awhile, not anything crazy), but I never really got that from her. Everything came to a head when she texted me saying she "couldn't do this anymore" and sent me a bunch of screenshots of her friendgroup telling her I was "just like her exes", "a master manipulator" etc. Their main reasons for the accusations were that I was "too secretive" (which I really don't think is true; I tend to want some baseline privacy in a relationship but she didn't even allow me that much- she'd join any public Discord servers I mentioned being in and told her I'd rather she didn't join on alts, etc, and even told me the stuff she'd find me saying wasn't bad and she was happy about it) and "accuse her of cheating too much", which.. Really. My side was honestly mostly just asking for reassurance since she completely stopped giving me it, her side was literally driving me to cut off all of my friends other than four people because I was scared she'd get upset with me again and also led to feel intense guilt for talking to. This whole thing also happened within a month of both my most recent suicide attempt (I had been going through a lot) and my parents wanting to kick me out (my mom is very mentally unwell and convinced herself that I had been prostituting myself- definitely not true to any degree. It got to the point where I had someone I decided to stay with and all my bags were packed). We didn't end up breaking up at this point.
So, fast forward to this year. She stopped doing a lot of the worse behaviors directly but we've still been fighting. My dad had been getting sicker and sicker- he already was pretty bad but he refused to see a doctor because my mom convinced him doctors are evil, the government made COVID in a lab!!!!, etc. It got to the point where he was slurring all his words, hallucinating, and unable to stand, and my mom called my out-of-state uncle who called an ambulance. I was, obviously, on my uncle's side, my mom was hysterical saying that the hospital is going to kill him and I'm with them, but my dad was stable at least. It turned out he had multiple small strokes. They did bloodwork and he's HIV+. They ended up diagnosing him with AIDs and dementia.
My relationship with my dad is very, very, very complicated. He was always the "better" parent but a horrible parent on his own. He'd agree with me in private but defend my mom whenever she was in the room, and as her mental health got worse he believed everything she told him. He used to tell me he'd leave her and take me with him, that he knew she was horrible and he never wanted her to do what she did to me, etc, but he still supported her. When things got bad between us he was a perpetrator as well. More recently he stopped trying to appeal to me at all and just entirely took her side on everything. I couldn't deal with any of it- I didn't have a room for a long, long time (I think until I was 15 or 16?) but as soon as I got one I just started locking myself in all day. I love my dad, but all he ever did was disappoint me. I couldn't bear to see him let himself get destroyed by my mom, and I just kind of decided not to- so this situation has been fucking me UP. He's currently fully conscious, my uncle flew over for a bit and had to fly back since he has kids but my dad fully took my mom's side, is refusing medications, etc. My mom and my uncle have been fighting over me constantly. I don't really want to do any of this shit but I have to, because as much as my dad let me down I don't want him to die. I was in the hospital all day and night for the first few days, I had to sleep on the benches in the emergency room waiting room since my dad was in a male room and they wouldn't allow me to stay past visiting hours. I was constantly pulling aside doctors and nurses and telling them to listen to me because my mom was trying to convince them he was just in there because he was "exhausted" or "wouldn't eat enough" and constantly lying about his condition. My uncle has good intentions but he's kind of heavy handed with certain stuff; he wants me to move in with him (I want to as well but you can imagine it's a tricky situation) and he always asks me to choose a side when they fight. My mom has been trying to convince me he's a rapist- I usually try to believe victims, but she also tried to tell me that I'm a prostitute, and she's definitely not a reliable person to listen to. I'm kind of just at an in-between where I don't believe her but I can't feel fully comfortable around him either since I have some bad past experiences surrounding that kind of thing.
About four days after my dad got hospitalized (?) and about a week and a half before my 19th birthday, my girlfriend texts me to tell me she's too exhausted to be with me anymore. The main reason was that I was constantly upset between the way the relationship was going and my dad being in the hospital. We worked something out but it's just been downhill since then, I can't be upset around her over anything without her turning it into a fight (literally while I am in the middle of crying, about how I get upset too much). As for the more recent weeks, she has completely stopped giving me ANYTHING- forget reassurance, she barely says I love you anymore, responds to long text messages with one sentence, etc. Her justification for this is that she feels unsafe with me. Her reasoning for this is:

1. I have had a habit of liking posts that made her insecure. This is where the lack of looks-based attraction comes in. I tend to like posts without really thinking about it too much, and sometimes I like thirst traps without realizing, since I'm not someone that thirsts after people like that. If I see someone in a cool outfit dancing it's going to be hard for me to say "this is a thirst trap" because I'm not thinking about it like that, I'm just going to see it and think "wow, cool outfit" and like the post. Then she'll see it and get upset with me. This is something I've been working on and cut down to a large degree, but certain stuff gets past me (photoshoots with a set concept, etc). She has tried to tell me that I DO actually experience looks-based attraction, which is kind of crazy because I know what I experience so she can't convince me otherwise ??? I don't know. I've also told her to send me any post that I liked that makes her insecure so I can learn what I have to look out for better, but she doesn't really do that, and I can't really know what'll make her upset unless she tells me. This is also an issue that SHE HAS AS WELL
   
2. She looked through one of my friend's followings and found a bunch of model's accounts, and says it's disrespectful that I "hang out with porn addicts". She plays Osu and is active in the community. Also has an issue with another one of my friends that I met on a Roblox bar game (she has worded it like I was literally giving out my contact at a real life bar, which I would understand being uncomfortable with, but dude it's literally Roblox). Also considers it a huge breach of trust that I mentioned getting gender envy from a Twitter mutual (I know how chronically online all of this sounds and I'm sorry). She'll ask me "isn't that a trans girl", "are they assigned male at birth" about my friends which is kind of just crazy? I don't know. I don't have a history of serially dating trans women or anything like that other than the groomer (which I don't think should count??????????) and I used to identify as lesbian for years- most of my exes are FTM and transitioned after dating me, which also shouldn't really matter??? I just think her fixation on me cheating on her with someone that's AMAB is kind of weird and unprompted
   

So I'm at a point where any time I ask her for ANYTHING it's just met with the response of her not being comfortable with me anymore. I can't hang out with any of my friends without her looking through their whole history and finding something about them that makes me "basically a cheater" for befriending them. I had to distance myself from a very close friend because of her once because he said "it's like we're one and the same" to me, and that if we went to a shitty hangout spot he'd still enjoy it "because it's me". She tells me to this day that remembering this stuff makes her physically sick but it truly was just innocent friendly conversation- we're both South Asian, like a lot of the same games, and have issues with abusive parents so we got along really well, and that was also why he said the thing about us being similar. I've been asking her over and over what I can do to make her feel better but she won't give me an answer.
She also told me today that I was bringing up her sexual trauma and that she's currently repulsed by the idea of sex altogether- I asked her why and she said it was because of the reasons I gave above. I'm at a loss. I'm clearly very fed up with this whole thing but I still am attached to her and love her a lot, and I definitely don't think I can go through a breakup right now with everything else going on in my life, even though you could argue it's like we already broke up. I really just don't know. It's been horrible watching her go from the perfect partner to this huge ball of insecurity and I don't know how to fix it nor how to let go. I don't have a lot of options, either- I've been almost completely socially isolated since I was a middle schooler, my parents pulled me out of public school and had me doing dual enrollment community college/homeschool. I don't have a strong support system at all, I can't get a therapist, I'm not allowed to get a job, the list just goes on and on and everything kind of just points to me being fucked

I'm looking to expand the *collective* of people I game with so hopefully I meet some neat people.
About me: I live in the east coast but work evenings right now so I don't get off work until 10PM but usually not home until after midnight due to going to the gym so people from other countries or other side of the country isn't really an issue for me. I work a lot but when I’m not working I’m online playing something. I tend to give people an honest shot to game with me but if I message someone on 3 separate days where they are online and get no response I’ll just end up removing them.
Games I play: I will play pretty much anything. I'm trying to grind up in League of Legends (I main Nasus top). I have been feeling Project Zomboid again so I would love to have someone to play that with either in a coop game or find a server together. I have really been wanting to also play GTA:O (preferably not RP but would do RP too). Other games I've downloaded recently are PUBG, Helldivers 2, ARK, and 7 Days to Die. I also have a ton of games on steam so if you want to play something else I’m usually down and I'm not opposed to buying something if we would actually play it. The only real type of games I don’t play are strategy games or racing games.
If you are interested in playing something or just talking hit me up either here or on discord. My discord is soulful

I see "online" used alot when it isn't really online but just bots the game have created. What games are actually online with actual online players?

I see "online" used alot when it isn't really online but just bots the game have created. What games are actually online with actual online players?

The game has lost me finally with online controller lag, stick Drift, out of sync animations with button and delay in reactions, just blah. Fun Reddit group to follow at least. Praying to the Good Lord NHL '25 has any positive upgrade, but if history has its way, it'll feel the same and frustrate some of us who work 10+ hours a day who want fun. Hope a Blessed EA NHL off-season for all of you.😺

I bounce around a lot between hobbies and learning projects, but I still game a lot— just enough for it to suck when none of my IRL friends are online or feel like playing.
Introverted, soft spoken, mostly only speak when spoken to or I have something to say until “warmed up”. Southern accent is thick apparently? Sorry in advance. Looking for people that are fine with swapping friend requests and just hanging out for some games as we see each other online. Sometimes a few rounds, sometimes hours, probably not daily consistently. Any region is welcome, but I’m NA CST for reference. I mainly use Discord and reply to messages fairly quick.
I play a LOT of games across most genres except for fighting and DBD format (Rip DB Breakers), but here are my recent high playtime games:
-FFXIV (AetheMidgard; all content lvls; don’t look at my hours on Steam)
-Helldivers 2 (Bot heavy. Counter Dil/AMSupply Pack usually)
-Splatoon 3 (mostly Turf War w/ bows)
-Palworld (I have a dedicated server setup in my room)
-Genshin (WL8, don’t mind joining lower)
-BG3 (Flexible with class/build)
-Destiny 2
If you enjoy rambling about a hobby that’s new to me, or any of the following then we’ll get along just fine.
-Fantasy novels
-Gunpla
-3D printing/modeling (newish for me)
-Origami
-Anime/Manga/ACGN collecting
-Motorcycles (new for me)
-DND 5e, Pathfinders (others would be new to me)
-Rollerblading/Skateboarding (terrible at skateboarding tho)
-sharing memes
-Coding
Thanks for reading