How to unblock websites from school

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2009.10.29 18:32 ucslug Law School Subreddit

For current and former Law School Redditors. Ask questions, seek advice, post outlines, etc. This is NOT a forum for legal advice.
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2010.04.26 01:08 serious_demilune Dentistry

Discussions and links of interest for dental professionals on all things dentistry. Questions and stories from patients should be redirected to askdentists.
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2013.08.01 20:37 LSAT_Blog Law School Admissions

The Reddit Law School Admissions Forum. The best place on Reddit for admissions advice. Check out the sidebar for intro guides. Post any questions you have, there are lots of redditors with admissions knowledge waiting to help.
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2024.05.15 11:20 Mayo6_B I need help with a friendship.

I'm putting fake names... (A lot of the timelines are spread out but they talk about those specific moments, I hope they make since)
I have a friend, I'll call her J. I have known J for almost 9 years. She and I grew up pretty close and we were inseparable. Over the first few years of our friendship she had lost my parents trust from an incident involving a boy, she wasn't allowed to stay over for sleepovers and I practically lost my whole summer that year. I was pretty angry at my parents and blamed things on them. I regret my actions and I did learn but in my mind I thought J was the only person who understood me.
After the whole incident settled down. School started up again and she would jokingly push me into a boy or a locker. She started putting her arm around my neck, trying to choke me. She would continuously punch me or smack me on the head. I honestly got annoyed by it but I acted like it was nothing. She had suddenly became obsessed with TikTok and she posted a whole TikTok about her friends, their was a video of me that stood out. I wasn't wearing a shirt. Which completely made me uncomfortable because I wasn't wearing a shirt and she took the video while I was changing. She didn't take it down. She also would post photos without my consent. Like ones that made me feel ugly or disgusting. And I would tell her how they made me feel. But she would still post them. I started telling her no when she asked for photos and she always would sneak one when I wasn't looking. She doesn't take no for an answer. She will start whining when you don't listen. I used to trust her with my feelings and I would tell her about everything. And now I feel like she knows too much.
This past school year all of my friends (king, J, Joe, Bell) and I went to SDYC. And well when we went J was lying a bunch and starting a bunch of drama and it threw all of my friends off. We all didn't trust J and Joe that well during that time. I felt like the only people I had was my friends King and Bell. Because they both understood how I felt.
After that. King, J, and I had a sleepover. During the middle of the night I was watching a movie and J began to bug me. She started pushing on me saying I was taking up too much room. But honestly I was the one who was sleeping in between two couches there's no way I was taking that much space because I was falling in the crack. She then proceeded to call me a fat roll. I said "no your a fat roll" jokingly. And then she freaks out and she went to tell her boyfriend. It annoyed me because all her boyfriend knows how to do is talk bad. After that sleepover. She started working at the same place as me and I told her about my big crush on this coworker of ours. And so then she decided to start flirting with him in front of me. She would throw something at him jokingly and giggle. I didn't try to think anything of it. But then when we were talking about him the next thing she decided to say was, "your just jealous because he talks to me and not you". The thing is I don't want to talk to him that's why I don't try to talk to him. He has talked to me before, but I rather admire him from afar. He's like 13 years older than me. He was just hot to me at the time.
I'll just say I am lighter than a 5'6 girl. I might have a little bit of belly fat but that's just my body. And I do have an eating disorder. I don't eat enough, I practically starve myself. J honestly made me feel worse and I started having moments where I would basically pass out from no iron in my body. J continued to body shame me even from the amount of food I would eat. She straight up made is feel like she was calling me ugly and fat. It hurt and it made me angry. I told my dad and he said she's just jealous and not to worry about it. I brushed it off but she basically would say something everyday. It got to a point where I was crying all the time.
During my last year of highschool J didn't have a vehicle. So she would ask me to drive her places. I didn't mind because we would be going to the same places. And I started offering to pay for her drink or something. I didn't think much of it in tell I was always taking her places and buying her drinks but she still wanted me to pay her back for stuff when I didn't have much money. She managed to buy a vehicle for a small price by saving up the money she didn't spend. I feel stupid for offering. One day her mom even texted me asking for the small money I "owed" J. But my parents think I don't owe her anything because I have given her most of my money and that she owes me money.
J also does this thing where if you don't give her your attention she'll keep tapping you. Over and over again. Everytime she asks for my attention it's always for something so pointless and stupid. Nothing serious. And everytime I ask for her attention she'll ignore me. She does it a lot. She only wants to have the attention. I stopped telling her about how I feel because all I know is she'll either use it against me or not actually listen and move past it. Like once she asked me how I felt and when I told her that I cried about something she moved on from it into her talking about her crying over some movie she watched.
The way she treated me made me so angry that I texted her boyfriend anonymously asking him to control his girlfriend and get her to be nicer to others. He didn't like the message and told his girl on the spot and J tried to call my fake number. I didn't answer and then she ran to me to tell me the tea. She later assumed it was a boy she was flirting with that she pushed away.
I hate her boyfriend but he deserves better.. because she has talked to another boy behind his back. When I started liking this one boy. I told her about it and then she began to tell me how she met this UK boy and she thinks he's all that. She later found out he was lying about his age and she got back to reality before she lost her in person boyfriend.
She told king I was flirting with this one dude but I wasn't. J told me to add this guy she found on Facebook on snap, I said okay and I called the dude a nickname like a Grandma would call their grandchildren. And I thought it was funny and the guy thought it was chill. I didn't think anything of it and then I blocked him because I didn't want to talk to him. She then decided to add the guy on snap. And she starts talking to him. The amount of times she has lied is crazy. I blocked him but she still has him on snap. For what reason I don't know.
J and Joe and I have recently had a lot of problems with each other. It's always J and Joe fighting and I'm between listening to them both argue about each other. I was getting tired of it. J hit my breaking point when she decided to ask me for my boyfriends sisters snap. You don't just ask your friend for her boyfriends sisters snap. That's weird. She also asked for my boyfriends and she looked him up when I told her no and she added a bunch of dudes with the same name. She didn't find him but there is no way I want her knowing him or his sister. I have too many trust issues with her. She's the main reason why a lot of my relationships didn't work out. They didn't like her and she manipulated me into saying things that upset them. She makes me so uncomfortable. She made me seem lesbian once when I know I'm not. But she made a TikTok about it and a lot of people from my school saw it. I don't like false accusations. I'm pretty sure she used it for clout. But also my parents think she's inlove with me because she can never leave me alone and she always HAS to hold hands or hug.
J doesn't understand a lot of things. And she calls me stupid. I honestly want karma to come get her but that's bad and I don't mean to say that. It hurts a lot.
I had blocked J on everything. But since I worked with J I saw her and she started bawling her eyes out at me saying she did nothing, I felt bad but I was annoyed because she kept bugging me. So I unblocked her. I decided to block her again after because my boyfriend said she was manipulating me. And well the more I had her blocked the nicer she was. After a while Joe did something to make me give up on my friendship with her too and J expected that to be a chance to get me back. And well she did practically. She was a lot nicer and I felt like she changed. But Man was I wrong.. Just today I was working my second night shift. I said something as a joke because I was hoping J would get what I meant. Her boyfriend was on the call... He took everything out of context and said something that made me feel less about myself. I already feel like crap being the person I am. I want to better myself but the more people say things the more I give up. I want to be encouraged not dragged down. I don't know why he has to be so mean. I never did anything to him. I don't know why they both have to be... I listen to her call people ugly all the time. Like just stop. I want her to stop. I'm leaving for the military soon, and she said that I can't get rid of her. That sounds psycho. And it honestly makes me want to get away more. I'm tired of the toxic environment and I want to get away. But she's everywhere. She knows everything about me. She has photos of me I hate. She has so many things she can use against me. I'm honestly scared. I want to block her again but I know she's just going to keep bugging me about it. And she might turn people against me. She's good at talking to people. I'm not I'm an introvert. I don't want her ever find me again once I leave. But I know she might try. People always find a way. And she's creepy. Because I know she'll be able to. But I just want to move on with my life. I don't know how to remove her from my life. What should I do?
submitted by Mayo6_B to TalkTherapy [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 11:16 Mayo6_B I need an opinion on a friendship.

I'm putting fake names... (A lot of the timelines are spread out but they talk about those specific moments, I hope they make since)
I have a friend, I'll call her J. I have known J for almost 9 years. She and I grew up pretty close and we were inseparable. Over the first few years of our friendship she had lost my parents trust from an incident involving a boy, she wasn't allowed to stay over for sleepovers and I practically lost my whole summer that year. I was pretty angry at my parents and blamed things on them. I regret my actions and I did learn but in my mind I thought J was the only person who understood me.
After the whole incident settled down. School started up again and she would jokingly push me into a boy or a locker. She started putting her arm around my neck, trying to choke me. She would continuously punch me or smack me on the head. I honestly got annoyed by it but I acted like it was nothing. She had suddenly became obsessed with TikTok and she posted a whole TikTok about her friends, their was a video of me that stood out. I wasn't wearing a shirt. Which completely made me uncomfortable because I wasn't wearing a shirt and she took the video while I was changing. She didn't take it down. She also would post photos without my consent. Like ones that made me feel ugly or disgusting. And I would tell her how they made me feel. But she would still post them. I started telling her no when she asked for photos and she always would sneak one when I wasn't looking. She doesn't take no for an answer. She will start whining when you don't listen. I used to trust her with my feelings and I would tell her about everything. And now I feel like she knows too much.
This past school year all of my friends (king, J, Joe, Bell) and I went to SDYC. And well when we went J was lying a bunch and starting a bunch of drama and it threw all of my friends off. We all didn't trust J and Joe that well during that time. I felt like the only people I had was my friends King and Bell. Because they both understood how I felt.
After that. King, J, and I had a sleepover. During the middle of the night I was watching a movie and J began to bug me. She started pushing on me saying I was taking up too much room. But honestly I was the one who was sleeping in between two couches there's no way I was taking that much space because I was falling in the crack. She then proceeded to call me a fat roll. I said "no your a fat roll" jokingly. And then she freaks out and she went to tell her boyfriend. It annoyed me because all her boyfriend knows how to do is talk bad. After that sleepover. She started working at the same place as me and I told her about my big crush on this coworker of ours. And so then she decided to start flirting with him in front of me. She would throw something at him jokingly and giggle. I didn't try to think anything of it. But then when we were talking about him the next thing she decided to say was, "your just jealous because he talks to me and not you". The thing is I don't want to talk to him that's why I don't try to talk to him. He has talked to me before, but I rather admire him from afar. He's like 13 years older than me. He was just hot to me at the time.
I'll just say I am lighter than a 5'6 girl. I might have a little bit of belly fat but that's just my body. And I do have an eating disorder. I don't eat enough, I practically starve myself. J honestly made me feel worse and I started having moments where I would basically pass out from no iron in my body. J continued to body shame me even from the amount of food I would eat. She straight up made is feel like she was calling me ugly and fat. It hurt and it made me angry. I told my dad and he said she's just jealous and not to worry about it. I brushed it off but she basically would say something everyday. It got to a point where I was crying all the time.
During my last year of highschool J didn't have a vehicle. So she would ask me to drive her places. I didn't mind because we would be going to the same places. And I started offering to pay for her drink or something. I didn't think much of it in tell I was always taking her places and buying her drinks but she still wanted me to pay her back for stuff when I didn't have much money. She managed to buy a vehicle for a small price by saving up the money she didn't spend. I feel stupid for offering. One day her mom even texted me asking for the small money I "owed" J. But my parents think I don't owe her anything because I have given her most of my money and that she owes me money.
J also does this thing where if you don't give her your attention she'll keep tapping you. Over and over again. Everytime she asks for my attention it's always for something so pointless and stupid. Nothing serious. And everytime I ask for her attention she'll ignore me. She does it a lot. She only wants to have the attention. I stopped telling her about how I feel because all I know is she'll either use it against me or not actually listen and move past it. Like once she asked me how I felt and when I told her that I cried about something she moved on from it into her talking about her crying over some movie she watched.
The way she treated me made me so angry that I texted her boyfriend anonymously asking him to control his girlfriend and get her to be nicer to others. He didn't like the message and told his girl on the spot and J tried to call my fake number. I didn't answer and then she ran to me to tell me the tea. She later assumed it was a boy she was flirting with that she pushed away.
I hate her boyfriend but he deserves better.. because she has talked to another boy behind his back. When I started liking this one boy. I told her about it and then she began to tell me how she met this UK boy and she thinks he's all that. She later found out he was lying about his age and she got back to reality before she lost her in person boyfriend.
She told king I was flirting with this one dude but I wasn't. J told me to add this guy she found on Facebook on snap, I said okay and I called the dude a nickname like a Grandma would call their grandchildren. And I thought it was funny and the guy thought it was chill. I didn't think anything of it and then I blocked him because I didn't want to talk to him. She then decided to add the guy on snap. And she starts talking to him. The amount of times she has lied is crazy. I blocked him but she still has him on snap. For what reason I don't know.
J and Joe and I have recently had a lot of problems with each other. It's always J and Joe fighting and I'm between listening to them both argue about each other. I was getting tired of it. J hit my breaking point when she decided to ask me for my boyfriends sisters snap. You don't just ask your friend for her boyfriends sisters snap. That's weird. She also asked for my boyfriends and she looked him up when I told her no and she added a bunch of dudes with the same name. She didn't find him but there is no way I want her knowing him or his sister. I have too many trust issues with her. She's the main reason why a lot of my relationships didn't work out. They didn't like her and she manipulated me into saying things that upset them. She makes me so uncomfortable. She made me seem lesbian once when I know I'm not. But she made a TikTok about it and a lot of people from my school saw it. I don't like false accusations. I'm pretty sure she used it for clout. But also my parents think she's inlove with me because she can never leave me alone and she always HAS to hold hands or hug.
J doesn't understand a lot of things. And she calls me stupid. I honestly want karma to come get her but that's bad and I don't mean to say that. It hurts a lot.
I had blocked J on everything. But since I worked with J I saw her and she started bawling her eyes out at me saying she did nothing, I felt bad but I was annoyed because she kept bugging me. So I unblocked her. I decided to block her again after because my boyfriend said she was manipulating me. And well the more I had her blocked the nicer she was. After a while Joe did something to make me give up on my friendship with her too and J expected that to be a chance to get me back. And well she did practically. She was a lot nicer and I felt like she changed. But Man was I wrong.. Just today I was working my second night shift. I said something as a joke because I was hoping J would get what I meant. Her boyfriend was on the call... He took everything out of context and said something that made me feel less about myself. I already feel like crap being the person I am. I want to better myself but the more people say things the more I give up. I want to be encouraged not dragged down. I don't know why he has to be so mean. I never did anything to him. I don't know why they both have to be... I listen to her call people ugly all the time. Like just stop. I want her to stop. I'm leaving for the military soon, and she said that I can't get rid of her. That sounds psycho. And it honestly makes me want to get away more. I'm tired of the toxic environment and I want to get away. But she's everywhere. She knows everything about me. She has photos of me I hate. She has so many things she can use against me. I'm honestly scared. I want to block her again but I know she's just going to keep bugging me about it. And she might turn people against me. She's good at talking to people. I'm not I'm an introvert. I don't want her ever find me again once I leave. But I know she might try. People always find a way. And she's creepy. Because I know she'll be able to. But I just want to move on with my life. I don't know how to remove her from my life. What should I do?
submitted by Mayo6_B to helpme [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 11:04 Tricky-Current-7718 SIM Lock, IPhone.

greetings! please help me, blocking the SIM card by the Bell operator led to the inability to use my iPhone. I am from Central Asia (Uzbekistan), I bought a phone in 2019, the phone worked well for 4 years, but after I did a factory reset, a sim card lock appeared (probably there was a one-time activation of the SIM slot) I can't unblock the email, as there is no way to register on the bell website and submit a request, how can I solve the problem? thank you in advance!
submitted by Tricky-Current-7718 to bell [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 10:02 Hot_Lavishness3439 What is Harvard graduate school of education acceptance rate?

Title. I’m so lost, I keep saying website that show the acceptance rate being 5% and other 50%. So I’m so lost. That’s from my dads resume and we are trying to figure out how smart he is lol 😆
If possible what is the accptence rate for each of those and how impressive is it:
submitted by Hot_Lavishness3439 to GradSchool [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 09:21 Boring-Rutabaga5319 A Comprehensive Guide About Application For Leave From School

During a student’s academic journey, unplanned events may happen that require them to miss class. People with kids need to know how to ask for school leave, whether for an emergency, a family emergency, or a planned vacation. You can request to miss school in writing by filling out an application for leave in school. People typically apply to leave school for various reasons, such as to go on a long trip, get medical care, or go to an event. Remember that applications for school leave need to be made politely and professionally. The application for leave in school should be brief and indicate the cause for the absence, how long it will last, and when the student will return. The application for leave will be talked about briefly in this article.

Reason for Leave application

For private reasons

A student may need to take time off if they have to deal with a family problem or another personal matter. For medical reasons if a child is sick or hurt and needs to be cared for or rest, they may have to miss school. Parents have to provide an application for leave in school for fever.

Because of religion

A student might miss class to attend a church event or celebrate a holiday. Because they need to learn, students may miss class to finish an internship, go on a study abroad course, or go to a conference.

Outside of school

Students may miss a few school days because of an event or action outside of school.They should provide an application for leave in school for going out of station.

Types of Leave

Medical, personal, emergency, and holiday leave are the most common types of leave that schools give. Knowing the differences between the types is essential because each may have different needs and ways of applying them.

How Applications Are Made?

Applications for leave in school are made through routes set up by schools. As part of it, you might have to use a website, fill out a form, or write an official letter. Parents and children should learn about the school’s recommended application process to ensure they follow it.

Very Important Papers

Application for leave in school may mean that schools must ask for supporting documents. Medical leave sometimes needs a note or proof from a doctor. You may need the same kind of proof of trip plans for vacation time. Gather the necessary paperwork and send it in with the leave request.

Time of absence

Most of the time, schools ask parents to let them know before they take their child out of the building. Then, the school management can do the right thing and ensure the child’s education is interrupted less often. Parents should request time off from school as soon as possible, in line with the school’s stance on advance notice. Parents should provide an application for leave in school for 1 day in advance.

Amount of time away

When it comes to schools, there may be rules about how much time you can miss for different reasons. There may be limits on vacation time, but people who are sick may be able to take medical leave for as long as they need it. Parents and children should know these time limits so they don’t get mixed up. The school management takes requests for time off when they are sent in. Anyone on the staff, like the director, school counsellor, or someone else, can review this. Parents and kids should be patient and wait for proof of clearance before moving forward.

Communication Tools

Schools usually set up specific ways for parents to talk to their administrators about requests for time off. One way to do this is to go online, email a pre-addressed address, or call the school office. When parents and kids use the official ways to get in touch, they can ensure their needs are heard and met. Parents and kids who want to take time off should check in with the school to ensure they got the application for leave in school and see what’s going on. They should quickly provide additional paperwork or details to speed up the process. The open conversation keeps approvals from being late.

Other Places of Education

To make sure that a student’s education continues while they are abroad, schools could offer other ways to learn. This could mean making study guides, giving homework, or teaching online. Asking about these plans might help lessen the adverse effects of leave on a child’s schoolwork. It must be turned in before the leave of absence starts and is usually sent to the school’s department head or director.

Go back to School Rules and How to Do Things

Schools could have set up specific rules to help kids return to the classroom after taking a break. This could include going to teacher meetings, making up missed work, or finishing tests. Parents who want to ensure their child returns to the regular schedule should call the school. For legal and administrative reasons, schools keep much information on students present and absent. To avoid problems, parents and children must carefully record requests for time off and keep an eye on their child’s attendance.

Review and Thoughts

Parents and kids can stay current on any changes or improvements by reviewing the school’s leave policies and procedures. Giving the school administration comments on their experiences with asking for time off can also help ensure that things keep improving.

Conclusion

Parents and kids need to know the school’s rules about requesting time off to talk about their needs and ensure the kids have a smooth educational experience. Parents and kids can handle the process confidently and keep their child’s schooling as regular as possible if they know the types of leaves, the necessary paperwork, and the permission processes. Parents and schools must work together, plan, and talk to each other so that application for leave in school requests are adequately treated and students can keep up with their work.

FAQs

How do I request school leave?
To request school leave, write to your principal or other school administration.
How early should I request leave?
Leave should be requested as early as possible to allow the school to make arrangements. The timeline depends on school policy and the cause of the leave. In a medical emergency, you may need to apply for leave sooner.
What is the use of leave applications in school?
A leave application is a written request to take time off school, college, or employment for a certain period.
submitted by Boring-Rutabaga5319 to primetimesnow [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 08:29 themoultonweekly "Goa Board 10th Result 2024: How and When to Check GBSHSE SSC Scorecards"

It’s the moment of reckoning for students awaiting their Goa Board 10th Result 2024. The Goa Board of Secondary and Higher Secondary Education (GBSHSE) is set to announce the results today, marking the culmination of the SSC examination process for thousands of students.
Goa 10th Result 2024: Students should visit the official website to check their respective results -- gbshse.in.
This year’s SSC exams took place from April 1 to April 24, unlike previous years, where the exams were conducted in two terms. A total of 19,557 students appeared for the exams, with 9,743 boys and 9,814 girls, including repeaters and private candidates.
Here’s how and when you can check your Goa Board SSC results:
Where to Check: Once the results are declared, students can access their scorecards on the official website of GBSHSE — gbshse.in.
How to Check:
  • Visit the official Goa Board website and navigate to the result section.
  • Select the link for “Goa Board SSC Results 2024.”
  • Enter your registration number, date of birth, and email ID.
  • Submit the details to view your individual scores.
Important Notes:
  • The online mark sheet will contain provisional scores. Students must collect the original mark sheet from their schools.
  • Last year, the results were announced on May 20, 2023, with girls slightly outperforming boys.
  • Girls achieved a pass rate of 96.92%, while boys scored 96.37%.
As you await your results, ensure you have your registration details handy. Once the results are out, don’t forget to download or print your scorecard for future reference.
Wishing all students the very best for their Goa Board 10th Result 2024!
submitted by themoultonweekly to u/themoultonweekly [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 08:13 Most_Physics_4028 Confused abt how to reconnect with a friend.

I'm a 17 year old male in my senior year of high school and I'm having trouble reconnecting with a friend. My friend is 18y/o female (completely platonic) and we've known each other since elementary.
Earlier this year, around January, we exchanged each other's phone numbers. However, we didn't text really frequently and mostly spoke in person.
Fast forward to February, my mom searches my phone (I'm not a legal adult so she's still my guardian, with permission to search) and finds a new contact. I don't really tell her when I add new contacts because I only had 2 beforehand which were just other male friends. My mom had forgotten the existence of this friend, and the name didn't ring a bell to her when I told her. But the reason she got concerned is because it was a girl. She immediately read through all the texts, but found nothing bad (we mostly exchanged notes for classes or discussed projects). She just doesn't want me messaging girls I guess because right after scrolling through the texts she blocked the phone number.
Literally the day after, I don't hear anything from that friend. Not from then and until now. Not a word. I assume they must have tried to send something and received the "Not Delivered" message and knew "I" blocked them.
Earlier this week I unblocked them but didn't say anything. That's where I am now. I don't know whether I should or how to tell them that I wasn't the one to block them, or should I drop it and move on?
submitted by Most_Physics_4028 to FriendshipAdvice [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 07:27 holisticlife5500 Airfare Secrets for Scoring the Cheapest Flights

"Golden rules" about buying cheap flights, like booking domestic flights 57 days before the departure date, are no longer valid, as there has been a huge shift in the travel industry in what days were thought the cheapest to booking flights. If a study has not been conducted recently, or only one year ago, do not put too much faith in it; there's no reason to worry about booking a flight far in advance. The stellar tips below are current.
Check airlines which don't appear on 3rd party websitesOne of the major weaknesses of Internet search engines is that they frequently will not display the flights of all airlines such as Southwest, Frontier, and Allegiant. To solve this problem, use a free resource like Wikipedia to learn which of these airlines operates a certain airport. Visit Wikipedia, go to their airport page, and search for a section called "Airlines and destinations." You are advised to locate a list of each airline that flies to that airport as well as all the nonstop destinations that airport operates. So, once you become aware of any carriers which did not show up in your first searches, you could now look for flights straight on the airlines' sites.Search one-way & round-trip flightsOnce upon a time the majority of round-trip flights were cheaper than booking two one-way airfare flights. That's no longer the situation today. For instance, Southwest and Jetblue set their prices for their flights on a one-way basis; and a round-trip flight is only the sum of the 2 one-way rates. So, you'll want to check one-way flight rates to ensure you buy the best round-trip deal by pairing two one-way flight tickets, probably on two different carriers.Look for one seat at a timeThere exists a virtually unknown quirk in how carriers price seats which could result in greater prices if searching for many passengers as opposed to a single ticket. Airlines put their inventory in fare classes, or called buckets, which are not always obviously visible to customers. For instance, there may be just three seats left in a fare bucket for $300 each, and the next higher bucket may be $400 for each ticket. But, if you happen to look for four seats, each one would end up falling into the $400 fare bucket.Search alternate airportsAt times the cost of a certain flight is extremely high that it could be a good idea to use your second or even third choice of airports. For instance, you perhaps are aware of the New York area's 3 biggest airports: New York-JFK, Newark (EWR), and New York-LaGuardia. But did you know that Stewart (SWF), Westchester (HPN), and Long Island McArthur (ISP) are also in the region? Several airlines permit you to look for all airports in a region by just specifying the destination as the city itself rather than a certain airport. The ITA Matrix tool is also a great way to look for close by if you do not know the area too well, and Google Flights offers a "Nearby airports" option to assist in this search, too.Don't always travel directBeing flexible with your route you'll be flying is another way to find a cheap flight. For instance, at times it's cheaper to travel to London and use a budget airline to Amsterdam instead of flying directly to Amsterdam from the actual departure city.To utilize this approach, learn how much it costs to fly directly to the target destination. Next, open Google Flights, type in the destination's details like country name to see the rates to nearby airports. If the difference happens to exceed $150 dollars, find out how much it actually is to fly from the 2nd airport to the main destination.Leverage elite statusAlthough having elite status will not allow you to book flights at a discount, you still could use it to save money another way. But with elite status with the majority of airlines let you to standby for earlier flights or perform same-day verified flight modifications. This can permit you to buy a discounted airline flight at an awful time, only to modify it to the flight you really want but at no extra charge. Even without elite status, the charge to standby or make a same-day verified flight modification might be less than the airfare difference between the flight you truly want and the lowest option that day.Use the correct credit cardThe right credit card may very well provide you major savings on flight tickets in a number of various ways. For instance, The Platinum Card from American Express now offers 5x points on all airline bookings made directly with the carrier or with Amex travel, worth 10 cents each dollar spent, based on TPG's recent valuations. That card in addition offers the International Airfare Program, providing cardholders discounts for premium class flights on certain airlines.Search for free hotels and stopover toursWhenever an airline imposes a lengthy layover because of its very tight schedule, the airline will usually offer a free STPC, or stopover paid by carrier, which can include a free tour or hotel room as well.
Don't mind the mythsThe initial and main fact to know whenever locating a cheap flight is there exists no magic trick for achieving this objective. There are however a ton of myths floating online about certain ways to seek cheap flights. Without doubt, you must have run into a lot of them while searching for the best flight deals.Airline companies use advanced technology like computers and pricing algorithms for determining flight prices and offer deals based on various factors like time of the year, weather, time of day, passenger demand, fuel prices, competitor prices, and others. These myths and similar ones will lead you astray. Be flexible in respect to your travel times & datesAirline flight rates vary a lot depending on upcoming holidays, day of the week, and time of the year. August is a major month for flying to Europe, and plenty of people are planning to travel somewhere hot during winter or fly while the kids are taking a break from school.In summation, if you're traveling when everyone is also flying, then logically your flight price will be higher.Flexibility is everything for cheap plane tickets & cheap flight dealsThe more flexible you are, you'll get better cheap flight deals you can book. Here's a new way of doing things: Instead of deciding where to go next, choosing dates, and then searching for the cheap plane tickets to certain destinations on those particular dates, consider first selecting your destination and dates based on the best going deals available. By exercising greater flexibility where you travel and the specific dates you fly, you will have a far better opportunity to find cheaper airfare.Book first, think later for cheap flight finder cancellationTake complete advantage of the free 24-hour cancellation window while purchasing flights. Because of the Department of Transportation's strict regulations, any cheap flight booked to or from the United States could be canceled without worry of incurring a penalty, for 24 hours after the flight's reservation; it must be booked no less than one week before the flight's departure. Yes, it's a very good idea to use a cheap flight finder these days. What this means is that if you buy a flight and the ticket price drops within 24 hour window, you could cancel the original flight and purchase the new, less expensive one.Warning: the 24-hour rule can only work for flights directly bought with the airline or with booking engines such as Priceline.Set a price alert for all cheap flight ticketsYou can choose emails or push notices to your cell phone which will tell you exactly when the flight you are interested in has increased or decreased in price. This may be a great way for getting the best possible price on all cheap flight tickets in the near future. You can do this on the majority of search travel sites and OTAs. Why miss out on potential easy savings? You can then always locate flight tickets cheap when you need them.Buy in foreign currency to get cheap flight ticketBecause regular fliers travel abroad now and then, you could switch the currency on the airline's website to determine if the price would be listed in other monies.You can save big this way. For example, if an airline increased the flight price in US dollars but not in Indian rupee, you could book flights at half the price! But this may require altering either the location or language on the airline's website; or you may change to the home country's URL, where ticket prices are generally cheapest by searching in its local currency. This is how you can in fact find cheap flight ticket to wherever you like to travel.Sign up for an airline's travel rewards credit card for cheap flight bookingOne of the smartest ways to take full advantage from travel credit cards is to use the hefty sign-up bonuses. For example, if you sign up for a new travel card when the airline is offering unusually high quantity of bonus miles, you could score yourself literally thousands of dollars worth of reward points by just opening the card.Although several of these travel cards could have higher annual fees, a big sign-up bonus may amount for months or even years worth of cheap flight booking for you and your whole family.The cheapest day to book flightsEven though you might see great deals flashing on your computer screen for international airfare three to six months out, if you are flying during peak times, or perhaps your plans are not very flexible, it's smart to begin searching sooner. The cheapest day to book flights actually evades many flyers.This does not automatically mean you ought to purchase tickets when hitting the 6-month window; hold on till you book cheap flights online. And, just ignore the old advice that travel experts often repeat regarding booking the cheapest flights at 3:00 a.m. on Tuesday; that used to be true but now airfare prices are updated often and great deals could pop up any given moment when least expected. So, now you can secure a flight cheap most of the time.Utilize momondo to book cheap flight air ticketsUpon finding what you imagine to be the cheapest flight wherever, try searching on Momondo; it will search dozens of OTAs; bear in mind that it may not display the cheapest fares seen on large OTAs and Google Flights. But you got a greater chance to find cheap air tickets sooner this way. Otherwise, only one cheap air ticket may be attained, if tried another manner. Now you too can enjoy when you book cheap flight tickets when you need them.Fly cheap during the low seasonHave you ever scanned flight prices from the USA to Europe's insanely popular cities in August? Surpassing quite easily $1000.00, they can frighten seasoned and expert travelers alike.But are those the same ticket prices in February? So, fly cheap from major hubs in USA to Europe, you could often locate roundtrip flights throughout the winter months for less than $400 or even $300!Fly basic economy for cheap air flightsA basic economy flight ticket could save you money, if you do not require checked luggage or advance seat selection. Pay only for what you need. In theory, you'll achieve cheap air flights via this option.Enroll in the airline's loyalty program for cheap airfareIf you fly one particular airline often, join its loyalty program in order to earn points each time you go anywhere. Then, you can redeem such points for upgrades or cheap airfare in the future. If you accumulate enough miles and achieve a considerable status with the airline, you might receive free upgrades. Now, you can take fuller advantage of cheap air fare whenever you require it.Skiplag to discover hidden-city cheap airfares & last minute flightsHidden-city ticketing happens by booking a flight to a place beyond your final destination, and then end your flight on the layover city. This could help you in getting cheap airfares as well as best last minute flights to most destinations. Think about it: can you imagine a better, more creative way to book cheap air fares while searching the Internet?Prolong your layovers for cheapest flight ticketsSometimes only by extending a layover a few days in another city in-between, you can score cheapest flight tickets to your original destination. In conclusion, more often than not, you'll usually find the cheapest flight ticket by following this method consistently. Why not? A lot of people are discovering that they are by accident getting the cheapest flight via the extended layovers.Don't overlook sales for cheapest flight bookingAirlines are frequently offering amazing deals which you may jump on fast enough and save yourself hundreds of dollars on your next flight. Sign up for your favorite airline's newsletter to be on top of their latest flight deals. This is yet another way to know about the cheapest flight booking that becomes available whenever.Focus on going across the ocean for cheap fly ticketsIf you are thinking to visit a distant location, it could be less expensive to book one ticket to the main hub, and then a second ticket from there to your final destination. For example, if you wish to fly to Alhambra, Spain, it's probably cheaper to book one roundtrip flight from your home to Madrid and a second roundtrip ticket from Madrid to Alhambra than it would be to buy a ticket to Alhambra on one itinerary. In essence, you'll end up with cheap fly tickets by following the above example.Don't overlook destinations with low cost carriers to get cheapest flightsCarriers such as Frontier, AirTran, and Southwest all drive down airfares along their routes. So, it may be quite wise to travel a bit longer to a larger airport with low-cost carriers, because even major carriers flights will most likely be cheaper. Using this method regularly, you are more likely to find the cheapest flights to most if not all your destinations. Why not take advantage of low cost flights whenever possible?Avoid Friday, Sunday flights, & traditional air travel daysThis may mean going away before and returning later than usual, or even flying exactly on the holiday. Pelletier, the air travel specialist, says you can save up to 50% by simply flying Christmas Eve or Day. She said: "We saved $300 per ticket around Thanksgiving for our family of four by flying out the Saturday before Thanksgiving and coming back the Saturday after. Not everyone can swing that with their work schedules, so my advice is to leave Thanksgiving day and return on Saturday for cheaper fares."Begin with a reputable flight search engine to find cheapest international flightsWhile searching for a flight, the initial thing you will wish to do is determine which airlines run a certain route and get an estimated price on the biggest carriers. Opposed to individually visiting all of these airlines' sites, begin by looking for a website which will provide results from many airlines and different combinations of carriers. You may end up with the cheapest international flights this way. So, you could start with Expedia or another such as Orbitz, Hotwire, Travelocity, and Cheap Tickets. Do not ignore Google Flights, which, though a very powerful search engine, know that it's not a booking platform and can't buy a flight ticket there. This is how you could find cheapest flights to many popular locations.Be flexible where you go to book discount flightsIf for some reason or another you cannot be flexible with the time factor of your flight, then try to be flexible with your destinations. It's ideal to be both. However, you still can save a lot of money and book discount flights by being flexible with either factor.You don't have to conduct manual searches, going city by city and day by day. Websites such as Google Flights, Skyscanner, and Momondo provide explore tools and permit you to add your nearest airport and see a world map with all the possible flights on it. This helps you to quickly compare many destinations with no need to brainstorm each potential option.Fly budget airlines/carriersMany years ago, you were generally stuck flying with traditional costly airlines. That's not true anymore. Budget airlines today service both short and medium-haul routes all over the world. For example, AirAsia provides incredible cheap flight deals around Australia and Asia for less than $150 dollars! Indian and Middle Eastern air carriers sell cheap flight tickets throughout Africa and the subcontinent.Book early: how to find the cheapest flightsYou can discover how to find the cheapest flights by booking early. Although flight rates continue climbing the nearer you get to departure, there exists a great spot along the way when airline companies start to reduce or increase flight prices based on demand. Do not wait till the last moment but do not book too far in advance. The ideal time to buy your flight ticket is about 2 to 3 months prior to your departure, or even about 5 months prior if you're flying there in their peak season.
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2024.05.15 06:58 Inner_Beast_5902 Girl Ignites Protective Older-Sister Mode Am I the a-hole or just petty (None of the names in this post are real names)

So when I was in sixth grade I had been friends with this girl I had known since fifth grade, she was a year younger than me. I'll call her Lilith. So the day started normally, except for the fact my younger sister (Mary) wasn't very happy, so our mom asked me to sit with her if she came to my classroom for lunch; I agreed as I am the oldest. In school the morning passed by normally, I tutored the kid I was assigned to, talked to friends including Lilith, did my school work, etc. Eventually lunch arrived and I broached the subject to Lilith that my mom had asked me to let my sister sit with me during lunch and asked Lilith if we could save her a seat just in case she wanted to sit with me. Everything seemed fine up until I asked if Mary could sit with us. Lilith had to go get her hot lunch from the office and Mary and I both packed home lunches. Lilith told me that if Mary sat in her (Lilith's) seat she (Lilith) would kill Mary. I told her that was rude, and that I would simply tell Mary that was where Lilith was sitting, so Mary could sit beside me or something. Lilith kept going on about how she would kill my sister over that stupid chair, and I sat there in silent seething rage. When Lilith went to the office to get her lunch I explained to our teacher what had happened and he said he would talk to her. Afterwards I sat with 'Teddy' the kid I tutored and 'Johnny' one of my other friends; I told them everything. Now this is where the petty comes in, Lilith had this obsessive crush on a kid a grade above me (who i will call Orion), and I had a minor crush on one of his friends (who i will call Dimitri); this is something Teddy and Johnny both knew. So they suggest telling the friend group Lilith and I were apart of. I agreed saying we would also tell her crush and mine. The plan: they (Teddy and Johnny) would go out first and tell Orion and Dimitri, meanwhile I would go and tell my sister and her friends (who were standing fairly close to my friend group so they over heard), after that I would go and finish the story to Orion and Dimitri. Well everything went according to plan, when Lilith came out and tried talking to Orion he told her to get away from him because he didn't want to hangout with a psycho (I didnt think he would go that far); and all except one of our friends turned their backs on her. The friend who sided with her told me I was a horrible person for doing that to Lilith, knowing what she (Lilith) had gone through. Something to know, Lilith's father had abandoned her and her mother before she was born; and her mother had gone to jail two or so years before for stealing, leaving Lilith in the care of her grandmother. Now it is my belief that no matter your background or how you grew up, threatening someone's life was and is unacceptable; and I told this "friend" exactly that. Then Lilith started to threaten me, in front of the entire forth, fifth, sixth grades (upper elementary) and middle school classes (we went to an elementary/combined middle school); saying things like she would ruin my life and ruin me, which only proved my point to the others, and I told her that if she came for me or my family she best be prepared for a fight (usually im not a confrontational person so this was a surprise to pretty much everyone). After school I told my mom what had happened and she talked with not only my and lilith's teacher but the principal of the school as well; which led to Lilith getting a talking to from the principal but not much else because of Lilith's background. The next day my teacher pretty much begged me to forgive Lilith, seeing as it was two weeks before summer break, and I told him I wouldnt even consider it until she apologized to my face; by this time Lilith had messaged me on Instagram saying how sorry she was Yada Yada blah blah blah and so on (to which i blocked her temporarily). So the teacher sent us both outside to reconcile; not realizing I had a different plan. Lilith tried to apologize but wouldn't look me in the eyes, my mother told me if someone ment their apology they would look you in the eyes and I told Lilith that and she tried again, again not looking me in the eye. Eventually, because she wouldn't look me in the eyes, I pretended to forgive her simply because I wanted this whole thing to end (and to prove my fake point unblocked her). I spent the next week or so pretending to be her friend (I never told my mom about this fake friendship thing, mostly because nothimg had been done about Lilith and I could be painted in a bad light for discrimination which wasnt the case because i knew about Lilith's home lige long before this whole situation and was still friends with her regardless; im not superficia, i care more about personality and things like money and appearance), and ghosted her the night of the big dance our school had like a week before the end of school; come to think of it i dont think she was even at the dance. And after the dance I started cutting back on how much time I spent around her, and I noticed pretty much everyone else did the same. Then on the last day of school, when I got home I immediately blocked her on everything: phone number, insta (all of her profiles), everything. AITAH?
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2024.05.15 06:21 gilleykelsey Weird Voice Mails TX

I don’t exactly know where to start here. Since turning 18 I’ve had many financial struggles and long story short I have a TON (~70-80k after interest added) of school debt, a bit of medical debt (~3000 from an emergency surgery), and some personal loan debt (~2000). No credit card debt because I’ve never had one and don’t plan on having one.
Needless to say, I get a ton of voicemails from debt collectors and scammers pretending to be debt collectors. So it’s really hard for me to weed out the legit debt collectors. I’m always too afraid to call them back and ID myself in case I screw myself over. Especially since I finally just now started making enough money to just pay all of my regular bills on time. Sometimes I do have to pick between eating for the day and gas in my car but it’s becoming a bit less frequent now. I’m so scared all these debt collectors will sue me for the debt I cannot repay yet before I’m officially “back on my feet” and plunge me back deeper into the hole.
These two recent voice mails I received are concerning in a different way. The voice mail said “This is (Name) calling from the law office of Brett Boylan please return this call when you receive this message.” That’s it. Every other debt collector call I’ve ever gotten has been “This is (Name) calling to speak to (My Name). Please return this call etc”.
I looked them up and they are in fact a real law firm that specializes in “Corporate, Municipal, Elder, Environmental, Estate Planning, Plaintiff’s Negligence Litigation, and Real Estate as well as Trust and Estate administration” (taken directly verbatim from their website). So that further confuses me as to why they have my number and are calling me since it seems they don’t do anything involving debt collection. But I’m not a lawyer so I may be mistaken.
Now, I know legally they probably can’t leave a voice mail detailing what the call is for (I wish they would it would relieve my anxiety a lot) but it’s weird that they didn’t even mention my name.
I’m just worried and so lost. If I barely make enough to pay my bills now how will I ever pay them if they garnish my wages? Should I call this law firm back or does it seem like another scam?
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2024.05.15 05:20 Additional_Bobcat_87 Any tips for a student wanting to plan early

I want to apply to top schools but I’m curious would these stats get me in? My counselor last year had a talk with me and said I had no chance for dropping a math course because of medical reasons at the time and a lot of work (that class ended up being dropped due to complains of several students). She told me after a year though that I might have a chance. this year I’m working hard in making a difference but I’m rlly unsure due to the competitive top 20 class, they have limited and almost no ecs but still. If anyone does reply I would like to get some tips Ofcourse no one knows what exactly gets anyone in but any suggestions for ecs and what to improve?
For context my school is very low income and it does reflect in the education and state tests
Taking all IB senior year + top 5% of my class, 3.98 gpa/4.0
Also: Every Stanford student from my school majors into law or engineering never Econ or finance I’m considering Econ + poli sci
Sat planning on getting more than a 1400 gonna grind all summer possibly getting a tutor to get a 1500+
Ecs: Business club president + deca president for this fall, made a project website for 1000+ students and the college and career center to gain access to resources related to business and scholarships in general
Women in corporate related Organization co founder- making resources accessible, one one one help creating a college profile and ecs, tips for classes and more and more than 500+ ppl
Volunteer at a global law related organization where I write articles, possibly editor in chief board position if accepted
Volunteer (completed some research related to corporate and mental health) & internship -> PVSA award
Teacher assistant for 3 years where I created worksheets for middle schoolers that were simplified in the fields of economics, history mainly, and ELA. Did a lot of grading aswell and provided feedback to students
GWC alumni this summer (SIP awarded)
Data analysis internship & marketing aswell, found CDS of several colleges to create stats for a website and created content for a popular platform
Mock trial for two years, planning on running this fall for a board position
Career fellowship for this summer where the company funds a project (paid)
A writer of a economics related book publishing soon where students state how they became interested in the field and a specific event they applied economics, changing their POV
Also dual enrollment: Econ course & criminal justice course
Expected this fall: democracy related fellowship for women stipend provided, UCLA business program for free, a college mentee program guiding students into top schools if I do become accepted, and other scholarships and essay contests
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2024.05.15 04:39 intentionLnamedesign A step in the right direction

Yeah! Another day! Today I could go on and on about how things went right, but I think it's better to talk about the not so great parts.
I binged 1h 30m worth of youtube when I got home from school today. Need to not do that. I did use an erp website, albeit to troll. I think that as long as I keep it under control, then I should be fine (as long as I don't use an erp website to erp, what am I saying xD). Otherwise, I think I did very well today! Tomorrow I will fight the fight again.
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2024.05.15 03:38 Straight-Tourist-638 [Tenant - US - CA]

Okay so this will be a long one but bear with me. It has been an ongoing situation for more than a year now.
I live in a 2br in a reasonably okay area, I’ve been here since 2018. It’s my 14yr old, myself and my big lab that is fully trained. In 2020 right before the pandemic, a family moved in downstairs (mom, dad, a high school are girl and a younger daughter, sometimes their older son visits). When they first moved in, I introduced myself and after introductions she told me that they thought drug addicts lived up there because of the noise. I apologized and told her it could have been my dog and to please feel comfortable enough to knock if we were ever too loud. We’ve never really talked, just polite greetings when our paths crossed.
Everything has been fine the last couple of years until last March while my 14 yr old was home by herself, she was recording herself doing her makeup and in the video we could hear banging coming from underneath the floor. She texted me about it and I told her that perhaps they were hammering something on the wall. From then on, it never stopped. We’d come in during the daytime and within minutes of it, they would be banging with a broomstick on their ceiling. I contacted management about it and let them know. The manager was surprised but said she’d talk to them about it. I’m not sure what she said or if she did, but it escalated, she went and spoke to a neighbor I get along with well and asked her to speak to me. The neighbor instead spoke to my now boyfriend who doesn’t live with me who was walking my dog. Neighbor downstairs then told my mother in passing that my boyfriend tried to get my (trained and super sweet) lab to bite her. Every single time that she has banged on the ceiling (a rough estimate of 15 times in the last year), I’ve called the security agency and followed up with management the next day. Last October I got a first notice to comply or quit in 3 days. It only gave me the date of the noise but not the time or nature of the noise. I was confused because I’d been working at my desk but figured perhaps I rolled my chair too loud. A month later, security came to my door at 10:30, I spoke to them through my doorbell since I was not home. They said there had been a noise complaint but I explained I wasn’t home and he left. I went to management the next day and she said that the lady had been in there crying and sobbing that we were incessantly making noise and stomping all day and her anxiety was getting bad. Management then asked if there was bad blood between us and I told her I hardly spoke to her since the first time we met. In January of this year, I bought 1/2 inch floor padding and carpeting and put it down all over my living room to try and make the effort to fix the situation before it got worse. I also went out and bought slippers for myself, my daughter and extra for visitors or bf. I sent video and photos to management to prove the modification. The banging stopped but only for about a month. In March, we came home on a Sunday at 1 pm and her door was open as we came up the stairs, she was looking at us from her hallway which made me uncomfortable. Within a minute of walking in, the banging started. I got angry and walked downstairs in plain view of the apartment camera and my own and told her she needed to stop because she had just seen us walk in, I didn’t really hear what else she said to me but I ignored her and went back up. When I went to management the next day, she told me that the downstairs tenant had gone to her apartment on the property crying that I had walked into her apartment and threatened her in front of her child. I was completely shocked and told my manager to review her tapes and gave her the time. She believed me and my mistake was not getting it in writing. She told me that her husband had also been in to complain and her children had gone in with her as well. Then asked me if I really thought they would all lie about the noise. I became more paranoid because now it seemed like management was not believing me about the noise even though I wasn’t home. I complained again after she started banging on the ceiling one morning around 8 while I was getting ready for work. They said a notice would be sent to her. In late April, I was out with friends and got back around midnight. Next morning I had work and when I got back there was a 2nd notice on my door. Along with it, a report from the night security saying that there was a complaint at 11 pm for moving furniture around and another one at 2 am for arguing and screaming but that both times when he approached my apartment, all was dark and quiet. I sent a video to management dragging my heavy coffee table to prove that on my carpet it doesn’t make any noise. I told them I’d been asleep and never heard the door at all. Unfortunately they upheld their 2nd notice. Last Thursday the 9th around 11 pm, I was washing my face getting ready to go to bed and I heard a loud knock. It was security, saying there was a noise complaint and asking if I was okay. I told him everything was fine and that I was just getting ready for bed. I asked if it came from downstairs and he said he could not tell me. The next day (5/10/24) I received a final notice to comply or quit. It states that on the 8th and the 10th there were noise complaints from downstairs. Again no time or nature of disturbances. I called management about it because I wasn’t even home on the 8th and had video of me leaving and coming back around 9 pm. I showered and went to sleep for my 7 am shift next day (I work an hour away). My lease was up April 30th, I emailed them twice in that month about lease renewal and management kept saying that corporate had not sent an offer for me and some other residents.
Again I’ve been there for 6 years, got along with the family that lived there before, get along with neighbors around the complex, I’m friendly with my side neighbors and currently there isn’t anyone on the other side of me. According to the property’s website, the apartment I’m at has a monthly rate of $2600, because of the pandemic and how long I’ve been there, I pay $1960 for mine. In the final notice, there’s also this paragraph that I’m not sure I understand too well since I automatically transferred to a month-to-month lease.
“You are further notified that the Owner hereby elects to declare the forfeiture of your Rental Agreement under which you hold possession of the above-described premises. If you fail to perform or otherwise comply, Owner will institute legal proceedings to recover any sums due plus possession of said premises which could result in a judgment against you and all other residents in possession including attorneys' fees and court costs as allowed by law, plus Owner may recover an additional punitive award of six hundred dollars ($600) in accordance with California law for such unlawful detention.”
I’ve always followed the rules, always complied with anything they asked, I genuinely am not doing anything to this family on purpose. But I am at the point where I don’t have company over, I don’t use my living room past 10, I don’t let my dog play with anything or chew on anything at home. My life feels like it is revolving around keeping the people downstairs happy.
Please, I need all of the advice, insight and help I can get. Thank you in advance!
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2024.05.15 03:17 dicktracy90 Paul Heyman's Infamous Shoot on Vince McMahon in 2001 Was Trimmed Down?

Long time lurker, first time poster.
I figured I'd give this shot here, in case I could get any help.
The infamous promo of Paul Heyman verbally destroying Vince McMahon on the SmackDown before Survivor Series 2001 on November 15, 2001 from Albany, NY was, and still is, one of the greatest of all time. It had everything in it, from Heyman discussing old school promoters such as Sam Mushnick and Don Owen, to tearing apart Vince McMahon's terrible business ventures outside of wrestling. Granted, it is all building towards the "Winner Takes All" main event a few nights later, and Heyman getting his comeuppance from Tazz, but it is so ruthless in its delivery.
Paul Heyman Promo on Vince McMahon 11/15/01
However, it might have been even more scathing.
Full disclosure: I love scouring vintage wrestling websites on Archive.org, looking at old news stories and seeing what might have came true and what was ultimately debunked. It's a complete giant waste of time, but I'm frequently intrigued on seeing how news was reported back then as compared to today's rapid-fire stories on Twitter and the like.
I came across the spoilers thread of the Smackdown tapings from 11/14/01 on LordsOfPain.net and caught this little bit when discussing the Paul Heyman promo on the taping:
Paul Heyman comes out to great heat from the crowd. Heyman wants to call Vince to his ring. Heyman pretty much trashes Vince on how he made wrestling into sports entertainment and trashed his failed football league. This prompts Vince to come out. Vince gets a huge pop from the crowd. Heyman pretty much tells him how he's ruined the names of Bruno Sammartino, Superstar Billy Graham, Bret Hart, and Shawn Michaels.
I was instantly intrigued. I didn't think I heard Sammartino and Superstar Billy Graham mentioned in the promos aired on the show. In fact, here is the transcript, credit to Cagematch.net, on that part of the promo it was mentioned:
You took Hulk Hogan's blood and you built Titan Towers. You stole Bret Hart's dream, and with that money, bought yourself an airplane with 'WWF' all over it. You did that, and you know it, you son of a bitch! You stole Shawn Michaels' smile, took your company public, and made yourself a billionaire. But not a self-made billionaire, like you like to tell everybody you are, oh no.
I started to scour all of the old dirtsheet websites that existed from back in the day and then came across RajahWWF.com. According to the article, here was the line apparently cut:
"It's not my fault. I'm not the one that lifts up my leg and pees all over the memory of Bruno Sammartino. I'm not the one that desecrates the memory of Superstar Billy Graham."
First, that's a killer line. Second, I could 100% see why this line might've been cut. Mr. Sammartino was still on the outs of the company, not making peace with the promotion he built until 2013, and Mr. Graham would make amends with WWE two years later.
With that said, I was wondering if the uncut version of this promo was ever released or leaked out to the internet or filmed fan cam style. I'd love to see it in context with the initial promo, and what the crowd reaction would have been like to that kind of line. I realize this is a bit of a long shot, but I wanted to see if anyone could possibly be of help.
submitted by dicktracy90 to SquaredCircle [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 03:07 he-need-some-malk Major holidays?

Is there any major holidays (not monthly ones) in hellenism? Like how Christians have Christmas or Easter, Muslims have Ramadan or Eid Al-Adha, Hindus have holi or Diwali, what major holidays do we have. I've tried looking that one calander website but it's too difficult for me to understand it. Especially in the summer, because it's coming up and I'll be able to practice more (no school or hiding from family)
submitted by he-need-some-malk to Hellenism [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 02:49 AdviceAndFunOnly What exactly should I do to I fix my sleep schedule? Help me please! It seems impossible to fix this issue!

First of all, Don't judge me please. I know I'm not perfect but at least I'm trying to become better. Maybe for some of you all this might seem very easy to do but not for me. It seems like a real challenge. Meanwhile there's other skills which seem easy for me and not for others.
My current sleep schedule thing is a pretty serious problem because it made me often late to university and I have bad grades now. So I don't even know how in the hell I'll be able to apply to work properly if I'll be late literally all the time.
It's even worse because I'm very sensitive to sleep and whenever I really haven't slept well I just feel horrible.
And if I'm late now and I sleep badly now, when I actually have a lot of free time this year, imagine how this might be much worse whenever I'm at work? That's why I'm afraid to work and I feel like I'm unable to be independent. And it's not for a lack of trying!
So I'll explain how we got to that point and how exactly my sleep schedule became so messed up.
When I was in high school, this wasn't the case. Well, I lived with my mom and she always watched me so that I went to sleep and woke up at the time needed. Also, we had a school bus only at one specific hour, so I couldn't have missed it. I had a semi regular sleep schedule.
Then came corona, and also first programming university, then one year of wandering around, and now languages university. A lot of things changed, but it seemed like it all became much more chaotic and disorganised. The timetables literally changed every week, half of the classes were online, and the teachers and other classmates didn't care at all about where you've been, unlike in high school. Also, ratings and important info was on the email instead of on a specific dedicated website. I was very used to the high school organisation and first followed it through university, including with workbooks for each course, but became less and less organised as time went on, because other people in my class weren't that organised, they even saw my organisation as strange, and also, all the stuff that I've cited, like the timetables, definitely didn't help in any organisation. Also, I started losing motivation and feeling dreaded and resentful, so I ended up going to sleep late, waking up late, and not even caring anymore.
Anyway, now, a few years have passed but this problem hasn't become better.
And it's not for a lack of trying! I know this is a serious issue and I did try to change my habits. But it really seems kinda impossible.
First of all, there's some reasons which aren't specific to sleep. Like for example, sometimes I wake up at night because I need to go to the bathroom. I know this isn't really my fault, nor a self discipline thing, and I definitely should and would see a doctor over this. (But unfortunately, tbh, sometimes I see a lot of doctors and I feel like no one ever helps me. Don't know of it's true but that's how I feel unfortunately).
Also another thing. I don't always eat regularly.
That's because I live alone now, and also because I try to eat good food, cook at home, and eat vegetarian, instead of just eating fast food, but the thing is, everything is very expensive, and sometimes I don't have the time and motivation to cook, so sometimes I don't even have anything to eat. It's not always a problem but sometimes it definitely is.
I was taught how to make specific dishes but it's not a skill I really master that much.
I think it's really not a great things because it definitely screwed up my sleep schedule too.
Sometimes it's also too hot or too cold and I hope it won't be that much of an issue this summer, but honestly, I'm really scared. Hopefully the cold showers, window blinds and fans will make it bearable.
Because I'm very sensitive to all that. Heat, cold, food, etc. I'm also very sensitive to sleep too. I definitely need go sleep to be able to act like a functioning adult.
But now some other reasons. Leaving that alone.
Let's take this week for example.
I definitely did try to go to sleep and wake up at good hours.
Two days ago, I tried going to sleep at 22 hours, but I simply couldn't. I wasn't able to sleep. I was in the bed for an hour, tried to sleep as much as I can. But I was unable to. As a result, after minutes wandering this way, I opened up my phone. I ended up learning about some historic event and installing some new program that made my phone work faster.
I only managed to go asleep at 2 hours in the morning.
Now, people will tell me that I shouldn't use my phone in the evening. But imagine if you feel horrible, you try to go to sleep but you can't, and you want to go to the toilet at every second. Should I really do nothing in all that time?
And also, my phone also can help me go to sleep, because I can listen to calm music that could relax me and make me able to very fastly go to sleep. Especially if I'm stressed and tired.
But anyway, I went asleep at 2:00. I thought it wasn't a big deal because I didn't have school the next day. But I still unfortunately woke up too early, like at 8:00, because of my cats.
And the people here would definitely say that it's a good thing. But was it? I felt really terrible all day. And BTW, when I sleep terribly it's actually much harder for me to concentrate and resist temptations. I feel really horrible, I want to sleep, I don't wanna do anything. As a result, I haven't done that much that day, actually. That's why tbh I sometimes prefer sleeping well even if I'm late to somewhere because at least I'll be able to do something, and also feel amazing, otherwise, I literally feel like a zombie that hates life.
But another thing is that me not sleeping well one day doesn't necessarily guarantee me sleeping much better the other day. Many people here say that you need to force yourself to wake up late even if you feel horrible because it'll automatically become better the next day. But it's absolutely not working for me.
The thing is that when you haven't slept well you're tired, that's true. But it doesn't automatically imply that it's very easy to go to sleep.
Often times I have a weird dilemma. Should I directly go to sleep because I feel very tired but I'm sometimes unable to because I feel dirty? Or should I rather go to the shower first, but this shower will inevitably remove my tiredness? Sometimes it's even more ridiculous, with me being on minutes on my phone the evening (because I feel tired and am easily distracted and it's hard for me to do anything), and then feeling that I have to go to the toilet which makes me not want to sleep anymore. Or should I not go there and directly go to sleep? That's an even worse idea.
Ah yeah why am I on my phone? Well if for example my stomach hurts am I really supposed to only be in the toilet without a phone? I really feel like I'm hours in the toilet sometimes because my stomach hurts!
But anyway. What happened next? Even tho I didn't go to sleep that late I still haven't managed to recover. I slept 8 hours, but that's it, not 10 hours needed to fully recover. Yeah it was so amazing waking up the best day!
And then the next day I ended up feeling really tired and terrible. Very very tired. So I ended up taking a nap. But the thing is that because of that nap (from 16:00 to 19:00), I haven't managed to go to sleep at 22:00 either, nor even at 0:00. Only at 3 hours! And was it my fault?
Should I have forced myself to not take a nap and only go to sleep properly at 22h? I've tried this strategy too a couple of times. First of all, this means the day is effectively ruined because I'm unable to do anything. But secondly, what actually happens?
Sometimes, my body still feels like 22h is a nap. So I end up waking up at 2 in the morning and not able to asleep anymore either.
Other times, I end up sleeping the whole night, but only like 8 hours or less, and not enough to both sleep well this day and recover from the previous one (therefore like 10 hours). This happened to me a lot of times, and the best day, I felt horrible. I didn't feel like going asleep but overall lacked all the energy I needed.
So what exactly should I do?
And that's also forgetting that I'm also very easily distracted. Sometimes I want to go to sleep at 22 hours but then look at some video or some new Reddit community and my brain feels very excited and I can't think of anything else. Maybe it is because of the phone but also when I was a child I had the same problem with books, so it's more of an ADHD issue, and not something that I can easily remove by getting rid of the phone, as if it was that simple.
Another thing is that it seems like today, literally everything takes up too much time for me. Whenever I'm in the toilet, or I eat, or I go out. Is it because of my phone? Maybe. But the thing is that it's not that easy to give up my phone when I don't have such an active life outside of my phone. Even if I try to. And also sometimes I feel like I try to be very fast but am unable to. Especially if I want to go to the bathroom at some moment. I don't know why and how all this happens. I guess this autism thing definitely doesn't help.
I really need 8 hours of sleep. Maybe not literally every night but at least most of the time. And preferably these 8 hours shouldn't be from 4:00 to 12:00, especially if I actually want to study and work properly.
Don't forget please, I have autism (basically here it seems to manifest in a similar way as ADHD) so it makes all that much harder unfortunately.
Anyway, please, I hope you guys will actually give me sound advice and I'll be able to follow it, because for now I just feel like I'm literally unable to and as if I'm disabled and will forever be late everywhere to any job.
I also feel like literally nobody is able to help me and no one even cares about me. Instead people constantly only criticise me as being egoistic and not serious. And shame me for using the phone. That's it.
Doctors tell me there's nothing wrong with me but sometimes I absolutely feel there's many things very wrong with me. Otherwise I'll be a functioninf adult.
I guess I shouldn't feel so bad about myself because while my schedule is absolutely disorganised, at least I don't have other problems, for example I never drank or smoked, so I shouldn't feel that bad about myself. But still this is a very serious problem.
But anyway, please give me some detailed advice and some specific things that might actually help. Maybe some YouTube tutorials even.
submitted by AdviceAndFunOnly to sleep [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 02:47 AdviceAndFunOnly What exactly should I do to I fix my sleep schedule? Help me please! It seems impossible to fix this issue!

First of all, Don't judge me please. I know I'm not perfect but at least I'm trying to become better. Maybe for some of you all this might seem very easy to do but not for me. It seems like a real challenge. Meanwhile there's other skills which seem easy for me and not for others.
My current sleep schedule thing is a pretty serious problem because it made me often late to university and I have bad grades now. So I don't even know how in the hell I'll be able to apply to work properly if I'll be late literally all the time.
It's even worse because I'm very sensitive to sleep and whenever I really haven't slept well I just feel horrible.
And if I'm late now and I sleep badly now, when I actually have a lot of free time this year, imagine how this might be much worse whenever I'm at work? That's why I'm afraid to work and I feel like I'm unable to be independent. And it's not for a lack of trying!
So I'll explain how we got to that point and how exactly my sleep schedule became so messed up.
When I was in high school, this wasn't the case. Well, I lived with my mom and she always watched me so that I went to sleep and woke up at the time needed. Also, we had a school bus only at one specific hour, so I couldn't have missed it. I had a semi regular sleep schedule.
Then came corona, and also first programming university, then one year of wandering around, and now languages university. A lot of things changed, but it seemed like it all became much more chaotic and disorganised. The timetables literally changed every week, half of the classes were online, and the teachers and other classmates didn't care at all about where you've been, unlike in high school. Also, ratings and important info was on the email instead of on a specific dedicated website. I was very used to the high school organisation and first followed it through university, including with workbooks for each course, but became less and less organised as time went on, because other people in my class weren't that organised, they even saw my organisation as strange, and also, all the stuff that I've cited, like the timetables, definitely didn't help in any organisation. Also, I started losing motivation and feeling dreaded and resentful, so I ended up going to sleep late, waking up late, and not even caring anymore.
Anyway, now, a few years have passed but this problem hasn't become better.
And it's not for a lack of trying! I know this is a serious issue and I did try to change my habits. But it really seems kinda impossible.
First of all, there's some reasons which aren't specific to sleep. Like for example, sometimes I wake up at night because I need to go to the bathroom. I know this isn't really my fault, nor a self discipline thing, and I definitely should and would see a doctor over this. (But unfortunately, tbh, sometimes I see a lot of doctors and I feel like no one ever helps me. Don't know of it's true but that's how I feel unfortunately).
Also another thing. I don't always eat regularly.
That's because I live alone now, and also because I try to eat good food, cook at home, and eat vegetarian, instead of just eating fast food, but the thing is, everything is very expensive, and sometimes I don't have the time and motivation to cook, so sometimes I don't even have anything to eat. It's not always a problem but sometimes it definitely is.
I was taught how to make specific dishes but it's not a skill I really master that much.
I think it's really not a great things because it definitely screwed up my sleep schedule too.
Sometimes it's also too hot or too cold and I hope it won't be that much of an issue this summer, but honestly, I'm really scared. Hopefully the cold showers, window blinds and fans will make it bearable.
Because I'm very sensitive to all that. Heat, cold, food, etc. I'm also very sensitive to sleep too. I definitely need go sleep to be able to act like a functioning adult.
But now some other reasons. Leaving that alone.
Let's take this week for example.
I definitely did try to go to sleep and wake up at good hours.
Two days ago, I tried going to sleep at 22 hours, but I simply couldn't. I wasn't able to sleep. I was in the bed for an hour, tried to sleep as much as I can. But I was unable to. As a result, after minutes wandering this way, I opened up my phone. I ended up learning about some historic event and installing some new program that made my phone work faster.
I only managed to go asleep at 2 hours in the morning.
Now, people will tell me that I shouldn't use my phone in the evening. But imagine if you feel horrible, you try to go to sleep but you can't, and you want to go to the toilet at every second. Should I really do nothing in all that time?
And also, my phone also can help me go to sleep, because I can listen to calm music that could relax me and make me able to very fastly go to sleep. Especially if I'm stressed and tired.
But anyway, I went asleep at 2:00. I thought it wasn't a big deal because I didn't have school the next day. But I still unfortunately woke up too early, like at 8:00, because of my cats.
And the people here would definitely say that it's a good thing. But was it? I felt really terrible all day. And BTW, when I sleep terribly it's actually much harder for me to concentrate and resist temptations. I feel really horrible, I want to sleep, I don't wanna do anything. As a result, I haven't done that much that day, actually. That's why tbh I sometimes prefer sleeping well even if I'm late to somewhere because at least I'll be able to do something, and also feel amazing, otherwise, I literally feel like a zombie that hates life.
But another thing is that me not sleeping well one day doesn't necessarily guarantee me sleeping much better the other day. Many people here say that you need to force yourself to wake up late even if you feel horrible because it'll automatically become better the next day. But it's absolutely not working for me.
The thing is that when you haven't slept well you're tired, that's true. But it doesn't automatically imply that it's very easy to go to sleep.
Often times I have a weird dilemma. Should I directly go to sleep because I feel very tired but I'm sometimes unable to because I feel dirty? Or should I rather go to the shower first, but this shower will inevitably remove my tiredness? Sometimes it's even more ridiculous, with me being on minutes on my phone the evening (because I feel tired and am easily distracted and it's hard for me to do anything), and then feeling that I have to go to the toilet which makes me not want to sleep anymore. Or should I not go there and directly go to sleep? That's an even worse idea.
Ah yeah why am I on my phone? Well if for example my stomach hurts am I really supposed to only be in the toilet without a phone? I really feel like I'm hours in the toilet sometimes because my stomach hurts!
But anyway. What happened next? Even tho I didn't go to sleep that late I still haven't managed to recover. I slept 8 hours, but that's it, not 10 hours needed to fully recover. Yeah it was so amazing waking up the best day!
And then the next day I ended up feeling really tired and terrible. Very very tired. So I ended up taking a nap. But the thing is that because of that nap (from 16:00 to 19:00), I haven't managed to go to sleep at 22:00 either, nor even at 0:00. Only at 3 hours! And was it my fault?
Should I have forced myself to not take a nap and only go to sleep properly at 22h? I've tried this strategy too a couple of times. First of all, this means the day is effectively ruined because I'm unable to do anything. But secondly, what actually happens?
Sometimes, my body still feels like 22h is a nap. So I end up waking up at 2 in the morning and not able to asleep anymore either.
Other times, I end up sleeping the whole night, but only like 8 hours or less, and not enough to both sleep well this day and recover from the previous one (therefore like 10 hours). This happened to me a lot of times, and the best day, I felt horrible. I didn't feel like going asleep but overall lacked all the energy I needed.
So what exactly should I do?
And that's also forgetting that I'm also very easily distracted. Sometimes I want to go to sleep at 22 hours but then look at some video or some new Reddit community and my brain feels very excited and I can't think of anything else. Maybe it is because of the phone but also when I was a child I had the same problem with books, so it's more of an ADHD issue, and not something that I can easily remove by getting rid of the phone, as if it was that simple.
Another thing is that it seems like today, literally everything takes up too much time for me. Whenever I'm in the toilet, or I eat, or I go out. Is it because of my phone? Maybe. But the thing is that it's not that easy to give up my phone when I don't have such an active life outside of my phone. Even if I try to. And also sometimes I feel like I try to be very fast but am unable to. Especially if I want to go to the bathroom at some moment. I don't know why and how all this happens. I guess this autism thing definitely doesn't help.
Don't forget please, I have autism (basically here it seems to manifest in a similar way as ADHD) so it makes all that much harder unfortunately.
Anyway, please, I hope you guys will actually give me sound advice and I'll be able to follow it, because for now I just feel like I'm literally unable to and as if I'm disabled and will forever be late everywhere to any job.
I also feel like literally nobody is able to help me and no one even cares about me. Instead people constantly only criticise me as being egoistic and not serious. And shame me for using the phone. That's it.
Doctors tell me there's nothing wrong with me but sometimes I absolutely feel there's many things very wrong with me. Otherwise I'll be a functioninf adult.
I guess I shouldn't feel so bad about myself because while my schedule is absolutely disorganised, at least I don't have other problems, for example I never drank or smoked, so I shouldn't feel that bad about myself. But still this is a very serious problem.
But anyway, please give me some detailed advice and some specific things that might actually help. Maybe some YouTube tutorials even.
submitted by AdviceAndFunOnly to ENFP [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 02:46 AdviceAndFunOnly What exactly should I do to I fix my sleep schedule? Help me please! It seems impossible to fix this issue!

First of all, Don't judge me please. I know I'm not perfect but at least I'm trying to become better. Maybe for some of you all this might seem very easy to do but not for me. It seems like a real challenge. Meanwhile there's other skills which seem easy for me and not for others.
My current sleep schedule thing is a pretty serious problem because it made me often late to university and I have bad grades now. So I don't even know how in the hell I'll be able to apply to work properly if I'll be late literally all the time.
It's even worse because I'm very sensitive to sleep and whenever I really haven't slept well I just feel horrible.
And if I'm late now and I sleep badly now, when I actually have a lot of free time this year, imagine how this might be much worse whenever I'm at work? That's why I'm afraid to work and I feel like I'm unable to be independent. And it's not for a lack of trying!
So I'll explain how we got to that point and how exactly my sleep schedule became so messed up.
When I was in high school, this wasn't the case. Well, I lived with my mom and she always watched me so that I went to sleep and woke up at the time needed. Also, we had a school bus only at one specific hour, so I couldn't have missed it. I had a semi regular sleep schedule.
Then came corona, and also first programming university, then one year of wandering around, and now languages university. A lot of things changed, but it seemed like it all became much more chaotic and disorganised. The timetables literally changed every week, half of the classes were online, and the teachers and other classmates didn't care at all about where you've been, unlike in high school. Also, ratings and important info was on the email instead of on a specific dedicated website. I was very used to the high school organisation and first followed it through university, including with workbooks for each course, but became less and less organised as time went on, because other people in my class weren't that organised, they even saw my organisation as strange, and also, all the stuff that I've cited, like the timetables, definitely didn't help in any organisation. Also, I started losing motivation and feeling dreaded and resentful, so I ended up going to sleep late, waking up late, and not even caring anymore.
Anyway, now, a few years have passed but this problem hasn't become better.
And it's not for a lack of trying! I know this is a serious issue and I did try to change my habits. But it really seems kinda impossible.
First of all, there's some reasons which aren't specific to sleep. Like for example, sometimes I wake up at night because I need to go to the bathroom. I know this isn't really my fault, nor a self discipline thing, and I definitely should and would see a doctor over this. (But unfortunately, tbh, sometimes I see a lot of doctors and I feel like no one ever helps me. Don't know of it's true but that's how I feel unfortunately).
Also another thing. I don't always eat regularly.
That's because I live alone now, and also because I try to eat good food, cook at home, and eat vegetarian, instead of just eating fast food, but the thing is, everything is very expensive, and sometimes I don't have the time and motivation to cook, so sometimes I don't even have anything to eat. It's not always a problem but sometimes it definitely is.
I was taught how to make specific dishes but it's not a skill I really master that much.
I think it's really not a great things because it definitely screwed up my sleep schedule too.
Sometimes it's also too hot or too cold and I hope it won't be that much of an issue this summer, but honestly, I'm really scared. Hopefully the cold showers, window blinds and fans will make it bearable.
Because I'm very sensitive to all that. Heat, cold, food, etc. I'm also very sensitive to sleep too. I definitely need go sleep to be able to act like a functioning adult.
But now some other reasons. Leaving that alone.
Let's take this week for example.
I definitely did try to go to sleep and wake up at good hours.
Two days ago, I tried going to sleep at 22 hours, but I simply couldn't. I wasn't able to sleep. I was in the bed for an hour, tried to sleep as much as I can. But I was unable to. As a result, after minutes wandering this way, I opened up my phone. I ended up learning about some historic event and installing some new program that made my phone work faster.
I only managed to go asleep at 2 hours in the morning.
Now, people will tell me that I shouldn't use my phone in the evening. But imagine if you feel horrible, you try to go to sleep but you can't, and you want to go to the toilet at every second. Should I really do nothing in all that time?
And also, my phone also can help me go to sleep, because I can listen to calm music that could relax me and make me able to very fastly go to sleep. Especially if I'm stressed and tired.
But anyway, I went asleep at 2:00. I thought it wasn't a big deal because I didn't have school the next day. But I still unfortunately woke up too early, like at 8:00, because of my cats.
And the people here would definitely say that it's a good thing. But was it? I felt really terrible all day. And BTW, when I sleep terribly it's actually much harder for me to concentrate and resist temptations. I feel really horrible, I want to sleep, I don't wanna do anything. As a result, I haven't done that much that day, actually. That's why tbh I sometimes prefer sleeping well even if I'm late to somewhere because at least I'll be able to do something, and also feel amazing, otherwise, I literally feel like a zombie that hates life.
But another thing is that me not sleeping well one day doesn't necessarily guarantee me sleeping much better the other day. Many people here say that you need to force yourself to wake up late even if you feel horrible because it'll automatically become better the next day. But it's absolutely not working for me.
The thing is that when you haven't slept well you're tired, that's true. But it doesn't automatically imply that it's very easy to go to sleep.
Often times I have a weird dilemma. Should I directly go to sleep because I feel very tired but I'm sometimes unable to because I feel dirty? Or should I rather go to the shower first, but this shower will inevitably remove my tiredness? Sometimes it's even more ridiculous, with me being on minutes on my phone the evening (because I feel tired and am easily distracted and it's hard for me to do anything), and then feeling that I have to go to the toilet which makes me not want to sleep anymore. Or should I not go there and directly go to sleep? That's an even worse idea.
Ah yeah why am I on my phone? Well if for example my stomach hurts am I really supposed to only be in the toilet without a phone? I really feel like I'm hours in the toilet sometimes because my stomach hurts!
But anyway. What happened next? Even tho I didn't go to sleep that late I still haven't managed to recover. I slept 8 hours, but that's it, not 10 hours needed to fully recover. Yeah it was so amazing waking up the best day!
And then the next day I ended up feeling really tired and terrible. Very very tired. So I ended up taking a nap. But the thing is that because of that nap (from 16:00 to 19:00), I haven't managed to go to sleep at 22:00 either, nor even at 0:00. Only at 3 hours! And was it my fault?
Should I have forced myself to not take a nap and only go to sleep properly at 22h? I've tried this strategy too a couple of times. First of all, this means the day is effectively ruined because I'm unable to do anything. But secondly, what actually happens?
Sometimes, my body still feels like 22h is a nap. So I end up waking up at 2 in the morning and not able to asleep anymore either.
Other times, I end up sleeping the whole night, but only like 8 hours or less, and not enough to both sleep well this day and recover from the previous one (therefore like 10 hours). This happened to me a lot of times, and the best day, I felt horrible. I didn't feel like going asleep but overall lacked all the energy I needed.
So what exactly should I do?
And that's also forgetting that I'm also very easily distracted. Sometimes I want to go to sleep at 22 hours but then look at some video or some new Reddit community and my brain feels very excited and I can't think of anything else. Maybe it is because of the phone but also when I was a child I had the same problem with books, so it's more of an ADHD issue, and not something that I can easily remove by getting rid of the phone, as if it was that simple.
Another thing is that it seems like today, literally everything takes up too much time for me. Whenever I'm in the toilet, or I eat, or I go out. Is it because of my phone? Maybe. But the thing is that it's not that easy to give up my phone when I don't have such an active life outside of my phone. Even if I try to. And also sometimes I feel like I try to be very fast but am unable to. Especially if I want to go to the bathroom at some moment. I don't know why and how all this happens. I guess this autism thing definitely doesn't help.
Don't forget please, I have autism (basically here it seems to manifest in a similar way as ADHD) so it makes all that much harder unfortunately.
Anyway, please, I hope you guys will actually give me sound advice and I'll be able to follow it, because for now I just feel like I'm literally unable to and as if I'm disabled and will forever be late everywhere to any job.
I also feel like literally nobody is able to help me and no one even cares about me. Instead people constantly only criticise me as being egoistic and not serious. And shame me for using the phone. That's it.
Doctors tell me there's nothing wrong with me but sometimes I absolutely feel there's many things very wrong with me. Otherwise I'll be a functioninf adult.
I guess I shouldn't feel so bad about myself because while my schedule is absolutely disorganised, at least I don't have other problems, for example I never drank or smoked, so I shouldn't feel that bad about myself. But still this is a very serious problem.
But anyway, please give me some detailed advice and some specific things that might actually help. Maybe some YouTube tutorials even.
submitted by AdviceAndFunOnly to getdisciplined [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 02:46 AdviceAndFunOnly What exactly should I do to I fix my sleep schedule? Help me please! It seems impossible to fix this issue!

First of all, Don't judge me please. I know I'm not perfect but at least I'm trying to become better. Maybe for some of you all this might seem very easy to do but not for me. It seems like a real challenge. Meanwhile there's other skills which seem easy for me and not for others.
My current sleep schedule thing is a pretty serious problem because it made me often late to university and I have bad grades now. So I don't even know how in the hell I'll be able to apply to work properly if I'll be late literally all the time.
It's even worse because I'm very sensitive to sleep and whenever I really haven't slept well I just feel horrible.
And if I'm late now and I sleep badly now, when I actually have a lot of free time this year, imagine how this might be much worse whenever I'm at work? That's why I'm afraid to work and I feel like I'm unable to be independent. And it's not for a lack of trying!
So I'll explain how we got to that point and how exactly my sleep schedule became so messed up.
When I was in high school, this wasn't the case. Well, I lived with my mom and she always watched me so that I went to sleep and woke up at the time needed. Also, we had a school bus only at one specific hour, so I couldn't have missed it. I had a semi regular sleep schedule.
Then came corona, and also first programming university, then one year of wandering around, and now languages university. A lot of things changed, but it seemed like it all became much more chaotic and disorganised. The timetables literally changed every week, half of the classes were online, and the teachers and other classmates didn't care at all about where you've been, unlike in high school. Also, ratings and important info was on the email instead of on a specific dedicated website. I was very used to the high school organisation and first followed it through university, including with workbooks for each course, but became less and less organised as time went on, because other people in my class weren't that organised, they even saw my organisation as strange, and also, all the stuff that I've cited, like the timetables, definitely didn't help in any organisation. Also, I started losing motivation and feeling dreaded and resentful, so I ended up going to sleep late, waking up late, and not even caring anymore.
Anyway, now, a few years have passed but this problem hasn't become better.
And it's not for a lack of trying! I know this is a serious issue and I did try to change my habits. But it really seems kinda impossible.
First of all, there's some reasons which aren't specific to sleep. Like for example, sometimes I wake up at night because I need to go to the bathroom. I know this isn't really my fault, nor a self discipline thing, and I definitely should and would see a doctor over this. (But unfortunately, tbh, sometimes I see a lot of doctors and I feel like no one ever helps me. Don't know of it's true but that's how I feel unfortunately).
Also another thing. I don't always eat regularly.
That's because I live alone now, and also because I try to eat good food, cook at home, and eat vegetarian, instead of just eating fast food, but the thing is, everything is very expensive, and sometimes I don't have the time and motivation to cook, so sometimes I don't even have anything to eat. It's not always a problem but sometimes it definitely is.
I was taught how to make specific dishes but it's not a skill I really master that much.
I think it's really not a great things because it definitely screwed up my sleep schedule too.
Sometimes it's also too hot or too cold and I hope it won't be that much of an issue this summer, but honestly, I'm really scared. Hopefully the cold showers, window blinds and fans will make it bearable.
Because I'm very sensitive to all that. Heat, cold, food, etc. I'm also very sensitive to sleep too. I definitely need go sleep to be able to act like a functioning adult.
But now some other reasons. Leaving that alone.
Let's take this week for example.
I definitely did try to go to sleep and wake up at good hours.
Two days ago, I tried going to sleep at 22 hours, but I simply couldn't. I wasn't able to sleep. I was in the bed for an hour, tried to sleep as much as I can. But I was unable to. As a result, after minutes wandering this way, I opened up my phone. I ended up learning about some historic event and installing some new program that made my phone work faster.
I only managed to go asleep at 2 hours in the morning.
Now, people will tell me that I shouldn't use my phone in the evening. But imagine if you feel horrible, you try to go to sleep but you can't, and you want to go to the toilet at every second. Should I really do nothing in all that time?
And also, my phone also can help me go to sleep, because I can listen to calm music that could relax me and make me able to very fastly go to sleep. Especially if I'm stressed and tired.
But anyway, I went asleep at 2:00. I thought it wasn't a big deal because I didn't have school the next day. But I still unfortunately woke up too early, like at 8:00, because of my cats.
And the people here would definitely say that it's a good thing. But was it? I felt really terrible all day. And BTW, when I sleep terribly it's actually much harder for me to concentrate and resist temptations. I feel really horrible, I want to sleep, I don't wanna do anything. As a result, I haven't done that much that day, actually. That's why tbh I sometimes prefer sleeping well even if I'm late to somewhere because at least I'll be able to do something, and also feel amazing, otherwise, I literally feel like a zombie that hates life.
But another thing is that me not sleeping well one day doesn't necessarily guarantee me sleeping much better the other day. Many people here say that you need to force yourself to wake up late even if you feel horrible because it'll automatically become better the next day. But it's absolutely not working for me.
The thing is that when you haven't slept well you're tired, that's true. But it doesn't automatically imply that it's very easy to go to sleep.
Often times I have a weird dilemma. Should I directly go to sleep because I feel very tired but I'm sometimes unable to because I feel dirty? Or should I rather go to the shower first, but this shower will inevitably remove my tiredness? Sometimes it's even more ridiculous, with me being on minutes on my phone the evening (because I feel tired and am easily distracted and it's hard for me to do anything), and then feeling that I have to go to the toilet which makes me not want to sleep anymore. Or should I not go there and directly go to sleep? That's an even worse idea.
Ah yeah why am I on my phone? Well if for example my stomach hurts am I really supposed to only be in the toilet without a phone? I really feel like I'm hours in the toilet sometimes because my stomach hurts!
But anyway. What happened next? Even tho I didn't go to sleep that late I still haven't managed to recover. I slept 8 hours, but that's it, not 10 hours needed to fully recover. Yeah it was so amazing waking up the best day!
And then the next day I ended up feeling really tired and terrible. Very very tired. So I ended up taking a nap. But the thing is that because of that nap (from 16:00 to 19:00), I haven't managed to go to sleep at 22:00 either, nor even at 0:00. Only at 3 hours! And was it my fault?
Should I have forced myself to not take a nap and only go to sleep properly at 22h? I've tried this strategy too a couple of times. First of all, this means the day is effectively ruined because I'm unable to do anything. But secondly, what actually happens?
Sometimes, my body still feels like 22h is a nap. So I end up waking up at 2 in the morning and not able to asleep anymore either.
Other times, I end up sleeping the whole night, but only like 8 hours or less, and not enough to both sleep well this day and recover from the previous one (therefore like 10 hours). This happened to me a lot of times, and the best day, I felt horrible. I didn't feel like going asleep but overall lacked all the energy I needed.
So what exactly should I do?
And that's also forgetting that I'm also very easily distracted. Sometimes I want to go to sleep at 22 hours but then look at some video or some new Reddit community and my brain feels very excited and I can't think of anything else. Maybe it is because of the phone but also when I was a child I had the same problem with books, so it's more of an ADHD issue, and not something that I can easily remove by getting rid of the phone, as if it was that simple.
Another thing is that it seems like today, literally everything takes up too much time for me. Whenever I'm in the toilet, or I eat, or I go out. Is it because of my phone? Maybe. But the thing is that it's not that easy to give up my phone when I don't have such an active life outside of my phone. Even if I try to. And also sometimes I feel like I try to be very fast but am unable to. Especially if I want to go to the bathroom at some moment. I don't know why and how all this happens. I guess this autism thing definitely doesn't help.
Don't forget please, I have autism (basically here it seems to manifest in a similar way as ADHD) so it makes all that much harder unfortunately.
Anyway, please, I hope you guys will actually give me sound advice and I'll be able to follow it, because for now I just feel like I'm literally unable to and as if I'm disabled and will forever be late everywhere to any job.
I also feel like literally nobody is able to help me and no one even cares about me. Instead people constantly only criticise me as being egoistic and not serious. And shame me for using the phone. That's it.
Doctors tell me there's nothing wrong with me but sometimes I absolutely feel there's many things very wrong with me. Otherwise I'll be a functioninf adult.
I guess I shouldn't feel so bad about myself because while my schedule is absolutely disorganised, at least I don't have other problems, for example I never drank or smoked, so I shouldn't feel that bad about myself. But still this is a very serious problem.
But anyway, please give me some detailed advice and some specific things that might actually help. Maybe some YouTube tutorials even.
submitted by AdviceAndFunOnly to selfimprovement [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 02:36 majoroofboys A Guide on What to Do At College if You Want To Succeed

Introduction

There was a post that was recently posted and it's been asked a ton: "How do I get a computer science related job after I graduate from KSU?". I thought I'd share this with everyone because I've been down this path and managed to make it on the other side. This will be a long explanation and hopefully, can serve as some sort of guide for students. That being said, things are subjective and this is not the holy grail of how to make it. You might find all, some or none of it useful. I encourage testimonials and whatnot in the comments. Can be applied to all majors but, this primary for technology-based majors since I am in tech field. YMMV

About Me

I've been around here for a while. I was a student not too long ago, studied computer science for my bachelors. After graduating, I work in FAANG and have worked in big tech for a while. No, I don't work at Amazon. I am a senior software engineer. I touch frontend & backend technologies. I participate in hiring frequently.

Starting Out

Over the years and while attending here, there's been a weird disconnect between students, goals and how to achieve them in tech. Goals can be anywhere from learning new technologies, getting internships to securing a full time job before or after you graduate. As much as I would love for there to be a path where you can do minimum effort and still succeed, there isn't. A lot of you seem to not realize that. Getting a degree in this field is not enough. Doing projects that show no passion / interests is not enough. Being stuck on tutorials for years is not enough.
This field is much like a sport. There are very few people that can just be great without any effort. You have to be consistent. Four years is not a lot of time. It goes by super fast. If you constantly push things back and you do not take the time to learn the fundamentals outside the classroom, you will not succeed in this field. This field is at a point where there's so many of you. Every post on LinkedIn and news articles said "hey, this field is a gold mine and you'll make six figures out the gate". For a time, maybe that was somewhat true. As of writing this, it's not. You're going against people who have: better schools, better experience, etc. You have to find a way to diversify yourself early. If you can't diversify, you're going to be in a tough place later down the road. Knowledge not something you can just consume in less than an hour and pass an interview. You have to know it well. If you don't, there's someone else who will.
There's an interesting connotation in life that you're either born super smart or an absolute idiot and that you have to be smart to do computer science / programming. There are people with raw IQ that can consume things like no one you've ever met but, that's such a rarity that there's no realistic use in using that as a data point. If you ever took the time to ask someone who you thought was really good at something, they would tell you something along the lines of: I love what I do and I spent a lot of time doing this. There are hours and hours of time people put into passions that you don't / will never see. Meaning that they can no-life this shit for days on end and still come back and do it some more. It doesn't mean that you can't succeed if don't do that but, computing / programming is a very boring field if you do not enjoy it. I would seriously contemplate why you're going through this. If you're doing it for money and only money, you're going to end up miserable. No amount of money can make you do something you hate. It'll wear you down both mentally and physically. If you're doing this because it's a mix of passion and money, you're like everyone else and you gave yourself a better shot. It's a mental thing. Don't climb uphill if you rather sit at the bottom. Don't complain if you're at the bottom and you rather be at the top. There's nothing wrong with that. But, don't do it. For what it's worth, I am not the smartest person. I graduated high school with a low GPA and took college seriously because I wanted to do more with my life. Plus, being on hourly forever sounds horrible imo. Use the opportunities that life has given to you and run with it. Run far, run smart and run in a direction that you can see yourself going long-term.
Additionally, college is what you make of it. Blaming professors or the program (while I do agree sometimes) is not a solution. Blaming professors that don't speak English is a cop out. If you work in tech, you'll be interacting with a lot of people from other countries. Suck it up. Work with it instead of against it. Professors and TAs can only teach you so much. Classes are meant to give you a taste of what it's like in that domain / space. It's not meant to fix all your issues and show you the way. That's for you to do on your own time. Take accountability of your own success, explore the internet (it's free) and lock in. Stop looking for opportunities to find you. Actively seek them out yourself.

Networking

Make connections with people. I cannot stress how important this is. Especially on the Marietta campus, there's a lot of you that go to class, stingers / food, run to class and immediately start gaming and think that when your classes are over, you're done for the day. That's a bad mindset. Make connections with people. Sit with random people at stingers or wherever. Have a conversation. Find a common interest. Don't harass men / women for a date while you're at it. Keep it cool. A lot of people say "there's nothing to do at KSU and there's no life on campus". That's not true at all. It's true if you choose to put your head in a box and refuse to look up. Join a club that interests you. Get close to the people in that club who actively attend and build a personal relationship. If there's no club with your interest, make a club. Fuck it, lead one. You can make one officially through KSU or add a discord server to the student hub and go from there. You'll meet some really cool like-minded people. Lots of my connections have come from randomly showing up to a club, getting out of my comfort zone and weirdly enjoying it.

Interviewing

Brush up on your interview skills. Technical and behavioral abilities matter. Culture fit matters. A lot of you seem to walk around with almost zero personal hygiene. Clean yourself up, practice talking to people and get places. There's been this stigma that culture fit doesn't matter as much as technical and if I have great technical abilities, they'll just accept me. I can tell you for an absolutely fact that I have thrown out / tossed out resumes from highly technical individuals that had zero people skills. If you can't communicate and clean up, you're more of a risk than someone who does all those things and has a bit less technical ability. I can teach someone how to code. I can't teach someone how to take a shower or brush their teeth. Know more than just Leetcode. Learn system design. Take a course / watch a video on Linux and bash. Do not be afraid of the command line interface. Understand how things work at a deeper level. Take feedback seriously. Do not argue with people. If you future manager / colleague tells you that you need to work on things, work on those things. There's nothing worse than a co-worker in denial.

Jobs

As for internships and full time opportunities, there's a few classes at KSU that you really want to master: Data structures, Algorithm Analysis, Operating Systems and Discrete math. If you're in a major that doesn't have those classes, spend the extra money and take those classes. Do not take them online if you can afford to come in person. Take the hardest / best professors for those courses. Super important. Leetcode is quite literally, those classes merged together in a prompt-style format. If you do not understand those concepts, you will not make it in this field let alone pass an interview loop.
Data Structures - Varies. Rate my professor.
Algorithm Analysis - Varies. Rate my professor.
Operating Systems - Do not take Carla McManus if you want to learn the concepts fluently.
Discrete Math - Andy Wilson.
Having solid resume is super important. Many people who don't secure things and get automatically rejected, etc have horrible resumes. Spend the money (it's a lot) to get your resume professionally written. It's worth it. Invest in your long term career aspirations. Templates are cool but, they don't convey information well and come across as lazy. Don't put every achievement ever on there. I don't want to see a wall of text. No, I don't care if you're a Boy Scout. No, I don't care if you bussed tables in high school. You get the point. The rule of "only one page" is complete and total bullshit. If you have projects and prior work experience related to the role, list it down. Don't conserve space for the sake of keeping it one page. You're limiting yourself. I know the career center actively tells people on handshake to keep it to one page. They're wrong. I landed internships & full time roles consistently at big tech / FAANG for years with a 1.5 / 2 page resume. Do not lie on your resume. If you can't solve a leetcode hard consistently with the technology / language of choice, you don't know it well enough. I have interviewed a ton of students and people that list they know C or Python and can't write recursion or gives me a solution in O(N^2) or worse. Aim for O(N), use a hashmap / hash table when you can and do it in a language that doesn't make you fight the runtime / compiler. Trust me, we know when you're making shit up. If you don't know something say it and then, tell them to explain more. This way, you show that you have the capability to learn. Ask smart questions. Do not ask questions that have already been answered. Take notes.
On your resume, experience is only real experience if you get a W2. If you don't get a W2, you can't claim it as professional experience. A lot of background checks these days are drilling down on incorrect information. I have seen instances where people lie, get an offer, company finds out through a comprehensive background check and their offer is gone. Do not put the fate of your future income on a lie. I cannot stress this enough. A lot of students and people actively lie.
Secondly, the trick to getting a good internship is timing. A lot of you wait until Nov - Dec to find an internship and then, throw your hands up when no one responds. That's not a good mindset. Solid internships are recruiting in end of July to August. By September, the amount of open spots are extremely thin. Local companies tend to look for internships during this time. Internships are about luck after that. Reach out to people in your circle to increase your odds. A referral goes a long way. Prior experience through projects that are complex and unique go a long way. It's a numbers game. Don't aim for the highest thing ever without some sort of referral. You can still apply but, do not expect much from it. Start small and work your way up. It's extremely rare to go from KSU undergrad sophomore to Google. It takes a lot of outside work. If you happen to land the internship, make sure that you get recommendations at the end. Having real people who you worked with in a professional capacity that can vouch for you is huge. If you're in your junior year and you get an internship, make sure you try to secure a full time offer. Loop in your boss, mentor, etc. Make your expectations clear. Reach their expectations and beyond.
Thirdly, full time opportunities are rare and most new grads that get hired come from the previous year's intern pool. If you don't get converted, you have to make up that time searching for a job during your senior year. If you do get converted, keep looking because companies are flaky these days. Always have a Plan B & C. Never fully count on Plan A. If you don't have internships across four years, it's over for you. From a hiring manager perspective, it's an absolute red flag when we come across someone with a degree and no internships. That's effectively going against the point of college. You'll have to settle for crumbs and crawl your way up. Very few make it out of that hole. The bar is significantly higher. Especially, now.

Searching for an Opportunity

Do not wait until after you graduate to find a job. Jan - Early May are when most companies finalize budgets and hire. If you wait until after May, you'll might have to wait until after the Summer and possibly, October for hiring to pick up again. Proactivity is nothing but good for you. If you can't be proactive then, you won't succeed in this field. Referrals matter but, personal connections with the hiring manager / recruiter are much, much better. Work your way up. Don't discount an opportunity because it doesn't pay well. Get as much experience as you can and bounce around. Do not go into the gate thinking you're going to make $120K - $140K / yr out the gate. You're most-likely going to make $68K - $75K / yr depending on the location. Do not listen to LinkedIn posts that claim all this cool shit and how to do it. Trust me, it's bullshit. Don't pay attention to it. It's a brag-fest. It's a long road. Start walking on it early and you'll reach the other side when it matters most. Trust in it.
The reality of this economy is that highly experience people have been laid off. Those people are applying to entry level roles and those roles are being filled for cheap. In addition, watch out for fake postings and scam jobs. If you take a contract job, always keep looking. Avoid jobs that will providing "training" before you even start. Avoid jobs that are less than week old. You want things that are fresh. It's a numbers game. Apply for 300+ jobs every week until you get a response back. Don't be discouraged by employers who don't respond or ghost you. Keep at it. It's a mental game.

Conclusion

I think if you do these things, you'll end up at a great spot after four years. If you're just now coming across this and you've been slacking, use this an opportunity to wake the fuck up, light a fire under your ass and lock in. If you're still in denial after reading this post and you have yet to get anything, light a fire under your ass, come to terms with it and lock in.
If you're in it to do zero work, cheat on your classes, mess around for four years and somehow wing a high salary or a job in this field, good luck. You're fucked. You're so fucked, in-fact, that you'll be wondering "why me and why is it so hard" for a long ass time. Don't be that person.

Cool Resources

Git - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvUiKWv2-C0
Github (use this as your portfolio; web devs should make an actual clean website) - https://github.com
Github Student Pack (tons of free resources) - https://education.github.com/pack
Linux Handbook - https://linuxhandbook.com/ Linux Quickguide - https://github.com/mikeroyal/Linux-Guide
Lots of subreddits geared around linux and programming. Great resources to find.
Understand: Kernel Space vs. User Space, Memory Allocation / Deallocation, Bitwise Operations, Memory blocks, processes and threads, context switching
System Design Primer - https://github.com/donnemartin/system-design-primer
Understand: Monolith vs. Micro-services, Tradeoffs between different approaches, Vertical vs. Horizontal Scaling, Load Balancers, Buckets, Data lakes, CI / CD Pipelines, Data Clusters, Client-Server Architecture, Synchronous vs. Asynchronous Context: System design is like a giant puzzle that has many forms. Create a basic design. It won't be perfect. Mix-and-match different services and know why, how and tradeoffs between each approach.
Programming language is dependent on the role and what the company favors. Common ones are Java, C++, Python, C#, JavaScript / TypeScript and C. You can look at jobs that you would like to work someday, look at the requirements and use that as a basis on where to start learning. Things constantly change. Fundamentals build up on each other. Start small. Work your way up. Do not dream big. Dream realistic. Everyone is different.
submitted by majoroofboys to KSU [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 02:32 brainpup2024 Money instead of gifts

My fiancé and I are getting married in July. We aren’t having a traditional wedding or ceremony. We’re leaving from the court house to a 5 day get away. As such, we will be missing out on the gifts and money that people typically give at weddings. However, we don’t want any gifts! The money that our loved ones would spend on items, we would much prefer to have in cash, and any cash they may have given— we ofc would still love to have, lol.
We have a decent amount of acres out in the country. I am finishing up graduate school, and once I’m done and have a job, my fiancé will be quitting his corporate and well paying job so that he can build us a house. He then plans on starting a business. This is so exciting, but we’re obviously taking a big risk, that we both have full faith in.
That being said, it would be nice if we could still receive the kind offerings from our loved ones without the wedding. I wanted to see if I could get some advice on how to set up and politely ask for presents in cash/donations? I have googled it, but there are so many websites that say they do free cash donations for newlyweds. Do any of you have any experience in this area? Or did you use a website to set up our PayPal on or something like that? And how would you politely and gratefully let your loved ones know this is your preference? I could use all the help we can get. Thanks!
**EDIT: I’m so sorry if this upset anyone!!! I did not mean any malice at all!! I am just unfamiliar with it all. I couldn’t handle the stress and attention a traditional wedding would require. I didn’t know about any faux pas regarding this, and I am glad I asked so that I know now! Thank you, and I’m sorry again! I appreciate all the advice.
submitted by brainpup2024 to wedding [link] [comments]


2024.05.15 02:11 mooncakee22 Was this a starting EA?

Hi there, long time lurker (since DDay last december) here but first time poster! Before I make this post, I want to clarify that I will be using the correct jargon and abbreviations for this subreddit, although I am still not sure wether my story belongs here. So here goes!
Me (31F), the BP and my WP (30M) have been together for 4 years now. December 2023 I caught my WP in what I believe was a starting EA. I had suspicions for while though, since it started in May 2022. Things were odd in my opinion, but I've also found it wasn't anything like most stories i'd read of EA's and nevee thought it was just me being silly.
WP was finishing his degree and he had half a year of a curriculum to follow still, with a new school and classmates. He found a friend group (all around 19/20 years old) there that he enjoyed hanging out with. Total of 4 guys (including him) and 2 girls. The curriculum ended with a 4-day schooltrip, after which he started acting weird. He was glued to his phone and distant. So much so that he ruined our anniversary dinner. He was completely distant, and when i suggested annoyingly that we might as well just leave, his response was "sure." And so we did.
I got tired of this behaviour and confronted him with it. It then came out that it was because it was a very emotional trip, where he revealed some traume about himself to his classmates, and didnt know how to reveal it to me and was afraid. I found this very strange as I did not see the connection to his distant behaviour in that. I won't go into detail but i personally did not find it anything to be ashamed of. As far as I know nothing happened there (though now, I will never know I guess), only that it was very much some teenager frat party for the entire trip.
Over the next 1,5 years from that trip in May 2022, WP and this group of friends stayed in contact. It wasn't much, and they'd see each other every 2 or 3 months, but WP did have considerably more text conact with one girl (AP), although it wasn't as much as most EA stories I read, like once a month (much more right after the trip though). Whenever he'd meet the friend group, WP would make it a thing to avoid inviting me. I'd seen them only twice in that whole time. He would either inform me a week before the meetup he was gonna go there, without invitation, or let me know right before or not at all (i later found in text messages, on meetups that never happened). It was always with the group though.
Don't get me wrong, I probably would've declined invitations anyway as they were way too young imo, but that fact he went out of is way to not include me was odd. Besides that i absolutely believe its healthy to also have friend alone time besides partner. But still, it struck me as strange.
This went on until he told me beginning of last december he was going for a weekend away with them at some point. His behaviour was beyond weird and awkward, as if he was asking his mom something he knew the answer was gonna be 'no' to. Thats when, a week later, i needed his phone for something, and it urged me to check messages with AP.
There it became apparant they had a much closer bond, albeit the little contact. There was mostly joking, but also some flirtation, mostly from her side. I found it during the 4 day school trip she had been telling him that people were gossiping because she supposedly was in love with him, and looking at hime alot and asked him if he minded the gossip. WP's response was "pff i dont care, ill look back at you like im in love, let them talk". There was also alot of venting from her about her bf, and him being the support for it all. I used to admire WP's need to help others, now it just makes me wanna vomit.
In the more recent convo's between them she was telling him to ask my permission for a weekend away, which is strange imo as friends, to do that. She started joking abouy skinny dippinh after. After that she was venting about the break up between her bf and her, how she was so "sex deprived" after a week, WP was happily joking along🙄 until she suggested that she'd get her fix with WP. WP's answer was ambigious, in our language it could equally mean "too bad for you I am taken" or "unfortunately I am taken already". AP reacted somewhere along the lines of "im only joking you know that😘😘😘". WP replied "i know babez😘"
Had read most of it at this point and had enough. I confronted him 2 weeks later. What followed was me yelling and crying, and him trying to explain everything with logic. Not once did he reassure or comfort me. Not until I asked him to. He didn't cut contact with AP immediately, but did so a week later. He decided that on his own and decided to do it when we were both at work. It was another stab in the back because it felt like he just wanted to control the narrative. I did check his phone at this time and he started deleting stuff, he also wasn't fully aware what I knew at this point (mind you he never deleted stuff before and phones were always open for each other) I asked him multiplie times if he wasnt deleting and lying about stuff, in comes the TT, lying and denying🙄. It wasn't until i mentioned, multiple times that I knew he was deleting and lying about stuff. His response "ohyeah, no i remember i did delete some stuff". He never fully aknowledged his betrayal, nor his TT and lying. He did fully block AP, went NC, as well as with the entire friend group, but he has done nothing to fix this. He keeps saying "he doesn't know how to fix it", even though he shows remorse and says he never wanted AP or meant anything with it, i guess throwing away our relationship meant less then "anything" then if thats the case. I feel like it's not my problem to fix, he has google and other resources to try and find a way but he just doesn't.
I am hurt, humiliated and angry. He has done nothing right in this proces, i feel. He has been rugsweeping, not been transparant, went NC with AP by blaming himself and coddling her. blocked her. Unblocked her again and then blocked again. Ofcourse no visible messages, but i cannot no for sure there werent any. AP's last message to WP was "i hope ill talk to you again at school XYZ". So apparantly they had discussed going there together next, something i knew nothing of while I was trying to help him find a good next school (which he was always dismissing, now i know why). I feel my resentment for him grow, even though he has been more sweet to me lately. I feel he has not even acknowledged the gravity of what he has done to me. The only thing he did 'right' was voluntarily telling me he gave AP a neck massage once at one of these meetups, I did not know at all. Apparantly she messaged him after rather flirtasiously afterwards, which was deleted.
We are not in IC or CC, as our workschedules don't allow it, though, to be fair he has not initiated it either and I also refuse to do it myself. Sometimes i even doubt this was an EA and it's in my head, but the pain is very very real. Advice is welcome, thank you and sorry for the long read<3
EDIT: I forgot to add that WP did explain his avoidance behaviour and clingyness to this group, he felt like he could finally be the center of attention there, since he couldnt with me and my friends, especially since im an extrovert and WP is an introvert. Thats why he never wanted me with these meetups. Also because he moved from pretty far to my place and these where the only friends who werent 2 hours away
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