I currently (40M) had my ex (35F) completely destroy our relationship while I was working out of town for a few months. This happened a year ago and wish I had these stories as a resource while going through it. I have just started to use Reddit and been reading the experiences of others here and have decided to share my story in hopes it will maybe help others. That way some good may come from some of the worst times of my life.
A little backstory for context for the story and insight to some of the decisions I made. When I turned 30 I left the major city in my Province (it is like a state if you are an American) because buying just a simple house is over a million dollars and I don't make near enough to afford that. My goal was to move to somewhere more rural to buy a house, meet someone, get married and have a child or two. It was my only dream I had and believed I could attain it. I lived out in the bush on my step dads property in a run down trailer I bought so I could save money for the first 3 years. I had my dog but the loneliness of living in the middle of nowhere had got to me. By then I had saved a fair amount of money, so I decided to move into the town. It was nice, it cut my commute down by 40 minutes, I had started to make a few friends and no longer felt so isolated. It was through my friends I met my future ex. Let's call her Kali. She had a long term boyfriend when we first met. Their relationship ended a couple of years after meeting her and we started dating a few months after.
We mostly had a great relationship for the next 4 years. The only thing was it was on again off again. She would dump me after I did anything really special for her for a week and beg me to take her back. It was like clockwork. I used to think it was because of her depression and that she didn't believe she deserved to be truly happy. Nowadays I actually think she might have been cheating the whole time and just felt guilty about it when I did nice stuff for her but I will never know the truth. I don't care what the reality is anymore anyway, Time has a funny way of making stuff like that irrelevant. We did have one bigger break of about 5 months. When it happened I took time off work to travel in my RV the whole time. From spring to summer. I really didn't like the town I lived in and decided to use that time to check out the rest of my Provence to figure out where I wanted to restart my life. She was basically the only reason I stayed for so long. I did have a decent job and family close by but most people I met there were not good people. Lots of drug users, liars, and general scumbags. I had only a few real friends there. After I got back and had decided where I was going to move to she had decided she wanted me back. She begged me to stay and be with her. She told me that she wanted to get serious. We started making real progress about getting married, having kids and looking at buying a house. Everything was coming up Milhouse and I couldn't be happier. So You can probably guess this is when my tale becomes interesting for you and life got real bad for me.
My career is seasonal. I work from spring to the end of fall and can go on unemployment insurance or find work. My dad had asked if I could help on his farm breeding horses that winter when I had still planned to leave my town. I had promised him that I would because it would give me a place to stay before people in my field of work would be looking for employees. This had been agreed upon before me and Kali had got back together. Now I have always been a man of my word. It's something I take great pride in. I have always hated liars. I don't mind a little embellishment to make a story more fun or if two people's stories are different as long as they both believe that was how the events happened. Everyone remembers things slightly off. She was upset that I had intended to keep my word to my dad but I had every second weekend off. The town my dad is in was only a 2 hour drive. So I told her I would be back twice monthly for weekends and that it would only be for 4 months. For the first two months everything seemed fine. During this time I started to look at rings to pop the question and booked an expensive spa for two days in May to propose. There was only one weird thing that happened during the first two months. On one of my visits she confided in me that her brother's wife had cheated on him and that their newborn baby was most likely not his. I was shocked that she not only knew but didn't plan to tell him. She said she didn't want to tell him for fear of breaking up the family. I told her that he has the right to know and that she was being a bad sister by knowing and not telling him. I also informed her if he found out she knew and didn't say anything that he would most likely kick her out of his life. She made me swear I wouldn't tell him. Even though I thought it was wrong I did agree to not say anything. It did get me wondering how she could not only not tell him but stay friends with someone that could do that to her brother. I think that's when I started to question her morals. The third month she asked that I didn't come out because she was "sick". I told her I didn't care, I could still come out and take care of her. She convinced me that she didn't want me to come so I just worked on the farm instead. I switched weekends so I could come out the next instead of in two weekends. The weekend she was "sick" her phone was off the whole time, lasting into the week. She told me her phone went through the washing machine. She was actually on a bender but I didn't learn that till later.
So I head out the following weekend. As soon as I arrive I start getting super sketchy vibes. I was already weirded out about the stuff with her brother and ghosting me for 4 days as we talked/texted multiple times a day normally. At first she acts great to me, cooks me steak and we go out to the bush to have a fire in the snow. At the fire she really started drinking heavily. She then mentions a guy she had been hanging with lets call him Brad. So alarm bells start going through my head. We go back to her house and she keeps drinking. I wanted to keep a clear head so I only had three beers all evening. She put her phone down unlocked because of how drunk she was and I took it to the bathroom with me to look up texts between them. I felt so guilty for doing it at first but once I see the text between the two of them the guilt is replaced with rage. I go to her room to confront her and she breaks down. First, how dare I go through her phone, this never would have happened if I would have broken my promise to my dad, nothing really happened between them, blah, blah, blah. I was furious and drove off. She blows up my phone the whole time. I don't answer. Ten minutes after I left her mother called me. She lives at her moms house. I took the call and her mom said she is freaking out and has harmed herself. I decide to go back and she has a bandage wrapped around her arm. Her mom hid all the sharp objects she could find. She was having a full on panic attack and begs me to not leave. I told her I would stay if she told me the truth. She admits to hooking up with him one time just that last weekend when she asked me not to come out. It kind of matches the messages and I believe her. I stay there till she falls asleep. Once she does I send Brad a text saying that she has a boyfriend with some screen shots of our conversations me and her have had that week. I was about to drive back to the farm when the dude called her phone. I pick up the call and tell him I am her boyfriend. He asks if that was a joke and I assure him it is not. He said he didn't know and actually apologized. I tell him that I'm pissed but if he didn't know I couldn't blame him. I should have asked him more questions but I was tired, not thinking straight and just wanted to go back to the Farm even though it was two am by this point. I get home and crash. Turned my ringer off because I know once she wakes up she will start calling like crazy. After getting the horses in for the night I decided to look at my phone for the first time all day. Around thirty missed calls and a ton of texts. I decide I need another day before I talk to her. Now while the whole day all I can think about is that it was just one time, she seems to be genuinely remorseful about it, how I'm 39 and really want children before I get too old. I took a call from her the next day on Sunday in the morning. She is still wasted. She hadn't stopped drinking since I was there Friday. We talk and I tell her that I am really upset but am willing to give us another chance. I still was in love with her and wanted to have kids, get married and buy a house with her. It was the dream I felt I worked so hard for. She was so happy I took her back and swore to me nothing like this would ever happen again. Basically I was a fool lol.
So I decided on my next set of days off to borrow my stepdads summer home on the river so we can have the place to ourselves. I grab food that she loves so I can cook her dinner and try to make it very romantic. I want to rekindle my love with her so I wanted to go all out on an amazing weekend. I pick her up and she is already a little drunk. I kind of wanted to hang sober but I don't wanna mess up with her so don't say anything thinking we can do a sober day when I take her out to go shopping and dinner the next day. When we get there she gets hammered. Kali had brought a big of bottle fireball on top of a bunch of white claws. I again didn't really drink that night. Once she was drunk and tired I carried her to the bed. As Kali is in my arms she looks up at me and says in slurred words "I don't know why you even felt threatened by Joe" I ask "what did you just say?". "I don't know why you even felt threatened by Brad" she replied. I put her to bed and my mind starts racing. Now her ex before me has a really close name to the one she said first but I also know she has a friend named Joe I only met a couple of times. They were not close or even hung out but were more like acquaintances. I go in her purse to look at her phone again but the battery is dead and I can't find her charger. I have an Iphone so I can't charge it up to look. I didn't sleep that well that night with everything going on in my head. I woke up at 6 am to her being very loud on the phone. I went out to the living room and she had drank all the booze left over from the night before. I ask her who she was on the phone with and she tells me an uber to leave. I ask why is she going to leave? Kali tells me she is upset that I tried to get into her phone. Guess I didn't put it back in her purse. Must have been out of sorts and forgot. I tell her I can drive her once I go to the washroom and get some clothes on. I go to do that, come out of the washroom to see Kali has already left. She was so drunk that she had left half her stuff behind. I decided to have breakfast before bringing her stuff to her house. After breakfast I packed her stuff into my SUV and noticed it had snowed that night. I could see her footprints out into the driveway. While Dropping off her stuff I noticed there were no footprints leading to her house, so I tried calling Kali. No answer. I left her stuff in the snow and decided to drive by her brothers and sisters house to see if there were footprints going into any of their houses but there were none. I sent her a nasty text about knowing she didn't go home, to go be with Brad or Joe or whoever and never call me again. It was a lot more profane than that but that's the gist of it. Cleaned up the house my stepdad lent me and back off to the farm yet again. The next day she blows up my phone and again I wait another day to talk to her. She tells me that she went home but I know that can't be true from the snow, but she says I must have been mistaken. She apologizes for getting drunk and leavening and that she is going to stop drinking after her birthday in two weeks. She has rented a hotel in the town I'm in for her birthday and wants to spend it with me. I agree just because I have to know the truth and want to look at her phone to make sure I am not crazy. She had gaslit me to the point I was questioning what I saw with my own eyes. A couple of days later I decided to send Joe a message on Facebook to see if he would give me the truth. I get a text from her telling me not to bug her friend and that she is embarrassed. I apologize and tell her I am excited about her birthday soon.
The weekend of her birthday comes so I go to meet her at the hotel. She brought her sister and other friend along. It actually is a really fun time. The girls did coke the first night into the second evening. I don't really like it but I figured she can let loose especially if she is going to stop drinking after her birthday. I also knew by Saturday night that they would all crash hard so it would give me time to look at her phone so I could know the truth. As I mentioned the weekend was really fun so I felt bad about going into her phone yet again. I did it anyway and my whole world came crashing down. Now I figured that I would maybe see Brad or Joe texts and Facebook messages. Seemed like Brad was done but Joe and her were totally hooking up. I also found out that she had slept with 3 other guys. I also saw she was using coke all the time now. She did it maybe three times a year when we dated but now it was every weekend. It looked like she started using regularly right before I left for the farm. Joe helped get it for her too, out of all the guys he was the one she hung with the most. Turns out he was also a meth head who was trying to quit for her. She also went to his house the morning she left the other weekend to hook up and buy coke. I was floored. I just staired and took screen shots till the early morning. I decided I wasn't just going to dump her but I wanted to ruin her life not realizing she was already doing that all by herself but hindsight is 20 20. So I started coming up with a plan of what I was going to do. I woke up the next morning and acted like everything was fine and went back to the farm. I was still so upset and didn't want to harm myself or others so had a family friend take my firearms for a while. I don't think I would have used them on myself or others but I knew I wasn't thinking clearly and didn't want them in my house while I was like that.
I didn't have to see her till I moved back because the next set I had off I had tickets for a concert in the city I used to live in. During that time all I thought about was how I was going to do something to ruin her life. I came up with some small things but my main plan was to pretend like we were fine and ghost her when my contract was up with my boss next winter. I had promised him another year after kali and I had gotten back together. Just typing it out makes me look back and cringe that I was so crazy. When I went to the city for the concert I told my best friend, my brother and a few others my plan. No one liked it and thought I should just go no contact, cut her straight out of my life. That probably was the smart thing to do but emotion was clouding my judgement. Also you all would get this story. They even informed me that because I would be lying to her, that I would be compromising my morals and turning into a worse person they didn't recognize. I either didn't see it that way or care. I have a hard time recalling what my brain was thinking during that time. All seems like a haze now that it's been a year. I think I was really upset that my dream and all I had worked for was ruined. A friend later said I may have been in love with the dream and not her. Maybe that's the reason I kept up all this insanity.
My time on the farm had come to an end and I was moving back to the town me and my ex lived in. I was set with my plan, excited to implement it and have what I considered just. But you know what they say of the best laid plans. My ex wanted to go to hang at her brothers as a welcome home party. I went but ended up drinking. Heavily drinking, to the point of black out. I don't remember much from that night but have had it recounted for me. I woke up in the drunk tank. Guess I couldn't lie and play it cool then huh? The story I was told later is, while at her brothers I had gotten drunk and loud. Kept waking up the new baby and we were asked to leave. So we caught a cab and I confronted her in the cab but all I could do was call her a lying, cheating, whore on repeat. She got upset and ran into the house locking me out. I had a bunch of my stuff in her house so I went to the door and demanded she let me in. All the while still only referring to her as the aforementioned 3 words. She told me to leave but my jacket and wallet were inside. It was below freezing at night still and probably wouldn't have made it home in the state I was in. I then kicked in her door to keep calling her LCW and grab my stuff. She was on the phone to the police, so I was taken away by them. One of the lowest points in my life. It still brings me so much shame to this day but it is what happened and I am not going to sugar coat it. I never laid a finger on her and I am so happy that I hadn't. Laying hands on women in that way is one of the scummiest things a man can do. I had to go back to her house once they let me out because my stuff was still there. I apologized to her mom who had been at her boyfriends that evening promising to repair the door for her. Kali begged me to talk to her and like an idiot I didn't just leave. I told her I saw everything and she only admitted to Brad and Joe. Lying about them and the others the whole time. Even when I brought up the screen shots she still couldn't come clean. I left just shaking my head. There is still a ton to this story but this is long enough. I could do a part 2 if there is interest. Catching you folks up to where I am now and the messed up things that happened in between.

This isn’t really a mom post but I feel better posting here than in a doctor sub, as they can be pretty rude. Would really love some insight if any of you had this happen and what it was?
For the past few years I have felt crappy most days than few. Lately this past year it’s been a nightmare. In may 2023 I had a random cyst that’s been deep under my skin rupture and it turned out to be an extremely rare type of staph and an unidentified other type of bacteria. I was on 2 antibiotics before I was sent to the hospital. I was then admitted and on 3 iv antibiotics and it kept getting worse and I kept having reactions to literally every antibiotic. They ended up having to cut a gold ball sized hole to clear the junk out and I was in patients 14 days and had a nurse come daily for 3 months to my house. Then in December I caught Covid and was admitted four days and in February flu b and admitted another 7 days because my body was going ape shit. High BP High HR High Temp and no meds helped. Now I have more cysts than ever and have literally waited a year to get into a derm. All my bloodwork is perfect minus low iron. I’m so over how I feel. I’m nauseated 24/7, tired all the time, get boughts of high heart rates for days on end (135-147) (normal ecg minus tachycardia) feel like I’m going to pass out, dissociate all the time, horrible memory, periods are all out of wack, smell burning all the time or rubber, itch all over, bad constipation or diarrhea, a crawling and burning sensation in my skin, my face is always red, I feel malnutritioned even though I’m 214 and haven’t lost weight. I eat healthy 80/100 and am active at work. I drink a ton of water, watch my sugar and dairy and grains. I don’t do drugs, I do smoke ciggs sometimes, but I feel like I’m stuck in flight or fight. I can’t sleep, and when I do sleep I’m either up every hour or out for 12. I have dark circles under my eyes and my teeth are basically rotting and can’t find a dentist who will take my insurance. Literally every blood test I’ve had is fine! I’m to the point I cry every night and at work because it’s too hard on my body. I’m a single mom and this job is the only one I have and I can’t find anything remote or anything that pays better. I don’t know what to do. I’m seriously depressed and anxious 24/7. Has anyone had any of these symptoms? Even in the hospital the doctor kept saying it sounded like withdrawal but I’m literally on no drugs that would cost me to withdraw. I take Ativan maybe once a week if I’m having a panic attack only. My doctor is at a loss.
To add, when I do eat I immediately want to vomit but don’t and even water fills my stomach yet I’m still over weight. I’m starting to think it’s all inflammation.

Background:

1. Mech Engi, but engi department is so short staffed that we do Manufacturing Process Engineering, QA/QC, R&D, RMA, machine support/shop fixes, & Project Engineer positions.
2. Company's starting hourly wage is not competitive @ 25/hr. Thus, high turn over rate.
3. I have been working for a year, and company is already 2 months late on a company wide raise for all.
4. I know historically, the first year, new grads like me get a 5/hr bump.
5. However, I am being laterally (while under same title) moved to a different position that gets commission (1% of custom projects with a cap of 100k, per company policy).
6. I KNOW for a fact that this company will say something along the lines that "since there is now commission, that is considered your 'raise' ".
7. I also know that on Indeed, the newest offers for this Manufacturing Engineer 1 position is 28-32/hr.

Essentially, if they do even bump me to 28/hr without moving me, I am NOT getting a raise if new hires get 28/hr. Therefore, my bump needs to exceed 28/hr.
So the question is, am I asking too much? As in, ask for at least 28/hr + commission? I also understand that typical commission based salary is usually lower, but that doesn't reflect the fact that I have already been there 1 year expecting the +5/hr bump.
​
Some extras:

1. I have access to an excel spreadsheet that shows turn over rates of all engineers. Somewhere around 2008-2010, the company mentality changed from having career engineers staying at company for 5-20 years to newer grads like me that bounce 6mo-1.5 yr.
2. Company mentality would rather let someone go at X/hr then hire someone at X+Y/hr.
3. I have MSME.
4. Location Fullerton.

​

A few years ago (about'1924) one of the justices of the peace in a town near South Bend tried and convicted a chimpanzee for publicly smoking a cigarette in violation of the laws of Indiana. The case came up in much the following manner: The chimpanzee that was the subject of the "monkey business" on the part of the local justice, was a part and parcel of a show that exhibited near South Bend. During the course of its act the monk puffed of the noxious weed, then under ban in accordance with Indiana's sumptuary statute regarding fags. The animal was promptly arrested, tried and fined five dollars. The plea that the animal knew not whereof it did and that it was not one whit capable of harboring malicious or criminal intent fell upon deaf ears. It seemed that the local jail would have a strange prisoner but finally the showman relented and paid the fine.

Okay so, this will probably be long so buckle in.
About a month and a half ago a friend of mine, we'll call them K. K recently found out that the apartment they had been staying in wasn't going to be renewing their lease and if they didn't move their things by the end of day that the landlord would be starting the eviction process. As someone who has faced houselessness before, I offered to hold some of their stuff at my place temporarily and get them to the hotel they would be staying at until they could move into their new place. No biggie right? Wrong. After helping them move their stuff and getting them to the hotel, they stayed in communication with them so we could help them move the stuff from our house to their new place, and the day before they were supposed to move they got let known that they opted to go with another rental applicant instead. K and their partner, who we'll call J, started really panicking about having to keep paying for a motel without on paper jobs and unreliable income. Keep in mind I actively live in a low income complex myself and, cannot have guests, for more than 14 days at a time according to my lease. J had just gotten a lead on a job closer to my house so I offered to let them stay for the 14 day limit I'm allowed to have guests, so that they could get a paycheck in and be able to go to a cheaper motel close by to their job. Another thing they agreed to was making sure that there was no evidence of them staying in my house, and that they had to be gone during the inspection window m-f from 8am to 5pm. I know, I'm probably going to be told more than once how stupid this is or I am, but I need to vent about this before I lose my mind more than I have already.
Carrying on, my partner is working at the same place as J, so J had a reliable ride to this job. My first red flag with J was that J used almost all of their points within their first week at the new job for a myriad of reasons. First time was because K didn't feel good and didn't want to be left home alone. Fine. I thought it was really ignorant to start off on the wrong foot with a new job but whatever. Second time was because J didn't have lunch to take to work and can't work on an empty stomach. After this absence J explained to their boss that they were struggling to work on an empty stomach, so boss agrees to reach out to a local food bank to get some lunches packed for J and my partner for work every day so they don't have to work on empty stomachs every day until they start getting paid. J declined bosses offer because they didn't want the food pantry food offered to them. Third time J doesn't go in is yet again for K not feeling good and convincing J to stay home. Well , and today we found out at the last minute before they were supposed to be at work that J had been fired for accepting an overtime shift on Saturday and then no call no showing that shift. J had been at this job less than 3 weeks. Which is 1 week longer than I agreed to. Here's the kicker, I live with and care for a disabled woman who has very very severe anxiety, and K & J keep going behind my back to talk to her and lie about things they'll do for her to keep being allowed to stay here. And I'm going to bullet point all of the just outright shitty things these people have done since they got here, and before anyone tells me to make them leave; involving the cops is out of the question as it risks our housing, and they should be gone in the next couple of days.
-they have harassed me over cannabis since the day we helped them move their things. I live in a recreational state but consume for medical purposes.
-they have repeatedly paid back other people that they owe money instead of me or my partner and admitted that to our faces
-they keep 'accidentally' mixing my partners clothes with theirs and then wearing them in front of me. Keep in mind they're a, size small and my partner wears a 3x there's no confusing their shirts
-I have a deep freezer that I've been working hard to stockpile since covid hid and inflation has made grocery shopping so hard, and they've eaten every single thing out of my deep freezer.
-they have raided my entire pantry as well.
-they've thrown out my leftovers without asking me because they themselves don't eat leftovers
-they switched their visitations with their child from 4 hours on Tuesday nights to entire weekends without asking
-they took my partners special broth he had bought specifically to make something, opened it, and didn't even read the packaging, put it open back into my cabinet and it molded. Im allergic to mold :
-they've been asked repeatedly not to knock on my doors after my bedtime hours because my partner works early mornings and has a hard time sleeping; then proceed to message me one time and wait precisely 0.2 seconds for a response and then knock on my door anyways.
-they use my shower and leave hair, clog my drain, and don't ask anyone if they have to use the bathroom before they use it to shower for over an hour. I have also repeatedly asked them not to leave their dirty clothes on my bathroom floor and they won't.
-they argued about having to leave for the inspections and promised they would help clean during them and then stayed in the area they weren't allowed to be in for every day of the inspections and didn't do anything they said they would do.
-they keep having blowout fights in my basement and as I already stated the woman I care for has severe clinical anxiety. She did agree to this arrangement but I guess it's true that even if you think you know someone you really don't till you live with them.
-K has been smoking my cigarettes for days and doesn't replace them but won't buy their own pack
-they've been asked not to come upstairs unless it's to use the bathroom (not shower) during our quiet hours and they won't stop doing that either.
I'm sure there's more I'm missing but I'll answer any questions about it I guess. These people have gotten me so stressed out that my stress induced seizures, that I've had under control for over a year now have come back with a, vengeance and are happening almost every day, I'm getting migraines with aura, my hair is falling out in clumps, and another stress induced ailment I deal with is ALSO flaring up because of the stress. Don't need advice or anything just wanted to vent how frustrated I am 🥲

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/MediumGrouchy5547
Originally posted to TrueOffMyChest
I found my sister who disappeared from everyone more than 15 years ago after she ran away from home
Trigger Warnings: abandonment, depression, self-harm, eating disorder, possible mental health issues
Editor’s Note: TCA stands for trastornos de la conducta alimentaria which translates into “eating disorder”
Rastafarian: a religious movement
Original Post: April 26, 2024
I'm really happy and confused and I really don't know if I can talk about this with friends and family but I need to share my experience with someone because I missed my sister. I don't need or want any advice since no one really knows the situation to be able to give a good advice without assuming things they don't know and it's weird to read people talking about my sister like if they know what she lived, I just want to share this and I know a lot of people have had experiences like this too so maybe someone can relate.
When I was 10 years old my older sister who was 22 at that time disappeared after leaving a note to our parents saying that she's okay and just wants to start over her life.
My sister was always a lonely but outgoing person, she always told me that she enjoyed solitude from time to time and noisy things took away from her quality of life because tbh it was loud LOUD where we lived and it was annoying even for me (we lived in a dangerous neighborhood so it wasn't too safe and she hated not being able to go for a walk at night or do things at night alone), she was depressed and I remember seeing her suffering from severe anxiety attacks, she used to hit herself to stop them and she had a strong TCA that triggered those things. She suffered from other mental issues as well and talked freely about that, she talked about those things in front of me and these are things that leave a mark on you.
She was the favorite of the whole family although mi parents never out pressure on her, they always let us do our life (my brother who was 19 at that time knows that, my sister was the golden child), my grandfather always made it clear that she is his favorite granddaughter, even now. She was the calm but funny kind of person, she was the closest to my parents and uncles so when she disappeared from one day to the next no one understood what was going on.
Even my sister had never traveled alone except to go to work and she always notified my mother that she was okay for safety reasons. She left a long note clarifying that she doesn't want to be searched but she loves us. It was a big blow for the family, I remember my mother wanting to report to the police but they said that my sister was not a minor and the note said that she left by her own so they can't do anything.
In a way, my other brother knew that this would happen at some point, since our sister mentioned a lot that she wanted to leave everything and go live in the countryside or become a nun and live in a calm place without any worries but nobody took her seriously about that. She was always the kind of person who did things without telling anyone, she liked her solitude sometimes even if she was always friendly.
The first months and weeks were strange, it wasn't that she had passed away but that she disappeared because she wanted to, I remember my mother missing her because they always shared the afternoons together.
I also missed her a lot, Even years later my family missed her and at Christmas or her birthday someone would always say "maybe she'll show up now" or we would wonder how she's doing or if she was alive.
Back to the present. I'm on vacation in the south of my country (This part of my country is very expensive for a tourist and I am the only one in my family who was able to come now that I am an adult), it's a place full of villages and while I was exploring I came to a place where they sold typical handicrafts of the place.
While shopping I can swear that the first thing I saw was my sister looking at some crafts on a shelf, she looked more adult but obviously I recognized her instantly, we are really similar after all.
I didn't really knew how to react after so many years and I didn't know how she would react, but I went over and said her name. What I didn't expected was that she would smile instantly when she saw me and called me by my nickname. I thought she had escaped because she didn't wanted anything to do with the family even if in the note she said she loves us, but she was greeting me as if nothing had happened.
She told me that she didn't expected to see me there and asked me if I was on vacation, she said that the village used to be not so touristy but now more people started to go and many villagers opened stores for the tourists. I was upset, I was angry with her for leaving us and pretending that nothing happened but I couldn't react so I just asked her if she lives in that town and she said yes, It's a place filled with old people.
We talked for a few seconds, she asked me what I'm studying and if everyone at home is okay, she told me I'm taller and thinner. Then she gave me a kiss on the cheek and told me that if I have a few days off I can go visit her but she doesn't have a cell phone so she told me that she's almost everyday there. My sister also told me to send hugs to our parents.
I'm confused and full of questions about her, she doesn't even wants to hide, she didn't looked or talked to me like someone who wanted to run away from something and hide. She was just happy to see me and happy to know that we were all good.
But I also feel resentment for her when I think about all that our parents and grandparents suffered when she disappeared, making my mother feel that she was a bad mother because she couldn't protect her.
But I'm ambivalent as I'm also happy to know that she's okay and that she doesn't hate me or the family but I'm also confused, Her behavior wasn't that of someone who is hiding or who doesn't want to know anything about her past, she was just happy to hear about us.
Edit: I'm sorry but there are people who clearly don't read the post, there are literally people saying that I didn't even knew my sister and commenting as if they knew her and taking things for granted about her life, there are even people saying that they don't understand why I'm 'angry' (it's just a feeling, a normal feeling, it's not that I hate her and I will treat her badly, god. Nor will I talk to my family without talking to her first, at what point in the post did I say that I'm going to expose her? I'm never going to treat her badly either because I have no reason to do so, It's crazy how half the comments draw silly conclusions) with my sister when i literally say it up there, even if my English is bad because it's not my first language, just read the post before you want to get a few likes for some unnecessary advice.
Additional Information from OOP on his sister’s note

OOP: My sister in the note said that she loves our parents, my brother was 19 when our sister left and he himself knows how much our parents loved and supported her when she was having a hard time with herself but the outside always affected her badly.
I was ten years old but I wasn't a baby and I remember what the family dynamic was like, I remember the feeling of my family, my parents are not narcissists and my sister loved them and they love who's my sister, she just had her own problems.
How could a parent miss the idea of their children? There's not a day when my parents don't miss everything about my sister, they miss sharing the day with her, my father even missed when she was cranky. My parents always let us go our own way and I can assure you that they never pressured us to be what they wanted us to be, I don't even know what they want us to be.

Relevant Comments
Mil1512: Is your sister neurodivergent?
With the hitting herself when struggling with anxiety and enjoying solitude.
I'm neurodivergent and my family live in another country. I honestly forget to talk to them most of the time and only really do because my mum messages me first. If she didn't we just wouldn't talk. Not due to any hate or anything, I'm just happy doing my own thing.

OOP: She's not. My sister had a lot of self-destructive behaviors and hurting herself was one of them when she felt 'fat', she also had eating disorders and panic attacks because of that. I don't remember too much but she did other things to not eat besides hitting herself, she was very open about her TCA and yes, she has a diagnosis from a professional.
My sister was always in touch with my mother and everyone in text, she always used to keep in touch when she was going out until the day she left, now she doesn't even have a phone. In her note she just said that she wanted to leave everything

mikuzgrl: It almost seems like the sister has been in contact with someone for a while and thinks news is being passed back and forth.

OOP: I never thought about that but I don't think so, seeing how my parents miss her I think the first thing the family would do would be to at least tell my father that she is okay :/

 
Can people just stop with the aggressive messages? Weirdos: May 1, 2024
I understand that many reflect their personal traumas in this site, but I literally received passive-aggressive messages calling me idiot or even telling me that I would hate my sister if she were neurodivergent or claiming that my parents abused her.
What's wrong with y'all? Go to a psychologist and stop reflecting your unresolved traumas in the story of a person you don't even know. Go out and touch grass and talk to a real person instead of literally sending private messages like that.
I didn't asked for any advice and just wanted to share my story because that's the point of that subreddit, but many took it the wrong way and decided to turn something positive into a way to fight.
I don't even understand why out of nowhere I started getting those kinds of messages or if someone share that post on a weird place.
 
Editor’s Note: TLP is trastorno límite de la personalidad which translates into Borderline Personality Disorder
Update: May 7, 2024
On sunday I finally found my sister again, she was selling things in the park with other stands, all of them are rastafari, not hippies or a sect. I walked over and she greeted me just as happily, we talked a couple of things and my sister told me that she doesn't have a cell phone so it was impossible for her to tell me that she wouldn't be there on Saturday.
I spent the afternoon with her at her stand and after that we went to her house, she lives alone (and sometimes with her friends). We talked for a while and at one point she broke down and hugged me, saying she was trying to stay calm all this time and didn't knew how to react because she didn't wanted to make me cry too bc she remembered that I was really sensitive but she couldn't hold it anymore. We cried and talked a lot.
My sister was tired of people, she said that our house was her safe place but hated the idea of having to work everyday and I didn't wanted to study anything, she was our parents' golden child, so they let her do whatever she wanted, but she knew that at some point she had to make something of her life. She was tired of how stupid and empty everyone was, of the politicians, of the TV showing empty things, of the noise everywhere outside when she wanted peace, even sleeping in our home was stressful for everyone because of the noises outside during the weekends when she wanted to be alone to smoke and listen music (tbh, In my memories as a child I didn't remember the obvious smell of joints that my sister had all the time)
That added to the pressure that society put on her to be physically perfect make her want to leave everything behind.
She didn't wanted to die but realized that my parents were miserable when they saw her being miserable, this is something I didn't know, but my sister said that our father had two jobs to be able to pay for her psychologist and medication, also my father used to spoil her a lot with the only food she eat without guilty. Running away was like dying symbolically.
My sister says that although our parents always supported her, she felt like a failture for not being able to improve and always relapsing, she felt bad to see our father working so hard and also wanted to live according to her spiritual mentality, free from all that is toxic in society.
All of those things make her ran away from everything, she felt like a burden and also didn't wanted to live a life working and miserable like everyone.
Sis told me that she never contacted us because she doesn't wants to have a cell phone and a trip to our province is too expensive to her because it's basically going from one end of the country to the other.
She hates capitalist society with all her soul and doesn't even have a TV. My sister said that she is much better now away from the city. My sister told me that she wants to talk to our parents but doesn't knows what to say and we don't want to give them parents a shock since our dad was sick a few days ago and is recovering from dengue.
I'm writing this with her beside me and doesn't understand what's the point of this site (The last social network she used was fotolog in 2007) but said that she doesn't mind if I post this. She wanted to write something but said she doesn't like writing in English haha
My sister was reading the comments and wants me to clarify that she never suffered any kind of a abuse, she has a lot of friends and never had any problem with anyone but likes to be alone from time to time to meditate.
And she's not neurodivergent (She said her behavior was normal because of her TLP), suffers from ED, borderline personality disorder and see a psychologist twice a month.
During her adolescence, the blogs Ana and mia were trendy, her friends had that 'aesthetic' and she was popular in fotolog (according to my sister, at that time it was taken as an aesthetic and even a book about that was really popular between teens, maybe someone from my country knows Abzurdah?). She hated going out when she felt fat, she couldn't have imperfections like cuts on her arms so she hurt herself with a rubber band when she overate, something she read in those blogs. Now she's in a good weight but it took her really long to not relapse again. It's been a long recovery for her and once you're anorexic you never stop being anorexic, she's always afraid of relapsing.
So that's it for now, we don't know how we're going to talk with our parents without making them freak out. And also my sister after seeing the comments on the post saw other reddit posts and said that her life is definitely better without a cell phone, she says that things like fotolog was the beginning of all evil haha
Relevant Comments
OOP on his sister being involved with Rastafari

OOP: Idk how it is in other countries to be honest, my sister doesn't live in community and there are no camps, she's one of the few who has a house because most of them prefer to travel around the country.
I really think it's impossible for them to be 100% Rastafarian here tbh because we are from South America and the Rastafarian community here is obviously totally different from the REAL Rastafarians, they just follow most of the philosophy
Edit: for example, my sister doesn't consider herself Rastafarian but she share some points of the philosophy they have, I don't know how the rest of them thinks

 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

I've been playing with my sample spreadsheet and was reminded that I literally relegated Sucreabeille to its own tab away from everyone else because I felt so negatively! They were my intro to indies, when I didn't know how to research scents or houses yet. I was hesitant to purchase because their marketing vibe didn't mesh with me, but I was convinced by the fawning reviews on almost every scent (on their website). At the time, I also didn't realize how expensive Suc is compared to many other brands!
I figured I could post these as a counterpoint to the mostly positive reviews that showed up when I searched for Suc scents. I'm sure the house works really well for some, but it REALLY didn't for me. Their pure gourmands worked better, but I haven't worn my top rated scent from this batch since I tried it out. I rested all of these for two weeks before testing, and I haven't revisited them since I got through all of them a few weeks after that.
My tastes: I really like rich resins and non-nag incense, as well as a spectrum of flormands and gourmands. I don't love fruits, green/aquatic scents or many dirt/dead leaf scents. Top houses: Olympic Orchids, Mythpunk Olfactive, Solstice Scents. Mid houses: Nui Cobalt, Cocoa Pink. Low hit rates: Suc, Alkemia, Possets, Haus of Gloi, BPAL GC
With that, I hope you enjoy my record of bewilderment.
BELSNICKEL Hot espresso with juniper berries and brown sugar.

• In the jar, tutti fruitti jelly beans, maaaybe coffee jelly bean if I smell hard enough to get a headache. On skin, very sweet, easier to see the brown sugar now and it's THICK. Syrupy. There's a little bitter note that could be juniper, sure, but it's toying with soapiness. After 15 min, already almost gone. The sweetness plus green now smells like a bathroom air freshener, plus the bathroom; not good. By an hour: gone! Weirdly getting more wafts of it around 4 hrs, and it's back to tutti fruitti? MAYBE brown sugar but god, just cloying. Erratic and synthetic, big disappointment. 1/10

CHAOS WITCH Freshly cut magnolias and moonflowers play with nutmeg cream.

• Very sweet pale floral with a cool spice, not identifiable as nutmeg. No clear magnolia. I didn't pay close enough attention to review this one well, but I was very disappointed by the complete lack of magnolia (a scent I love) and the vaguely unpleasant Suc DNA 3/10

DO NO HARM, TAKE NO SHIT Plums, nectarines, apricots, and blackberries sparkle on a bed of sage and fallen leaves deep in the autumnal forest.

• In jar: Fairly pleasant candy fruit smell (plum, berries) with a little cool herbaceous back to it. On skin: Fruits disappear to general sweetness over a damp earth and burnt rubber scent, maybe burnt leaves? Confusing. At 15 min, sort of a fruity sweetness? Over a sour off-note that could be the rotten leaves, but it comes off as sort of... poopy? I actually washed this off before leaving for work (less than an hour) bc I didn't want to smell like it - scrubbing didn't totally work, so I can say it's vaguely sweet with a dirty-herby soap base that I don't care for but isn't making me yak 1/10

AFTERGLOW Dark chocolate, amber, honey.

• Definitely get dark chocolate and honey in the jar! Not creamy but still rich and warm. On skin it loses power and sweetness very fast, it's a very faint borderline-musty borderline-burnt rubber smell with a baby powder. After a few minutes, thank god it's back to the bottle smell! Not as chocolatey which is too bad, but a pleasant sweet amber with a hint of chocolate. Something of the wet scent is still sneaking around? But then it turned into a cocoa butter lotion smell. Stays similar over the next 4 or 5 hrs, growing fainter. I think I like this? Maybe a bit synthetic though, but then again I don't always love the sharpness of honey 6/10

CREAM TEA A warm mug of creamy, frothy, caffeine-injected tea. A blend of chai tea, burnt sugar, white musk, warm milk, and hot scones slathered with raspberry jam and honey.

• More like an iced chai, not a warm scent in the jar. There's a sharp zingy berry in the background which might be what's cooling it down. On skin, the cool note is more dry loose leaf black tea, with a big sweet raspberry jam in front - not the most natural but nice. As it starts to dry, the closer I get to my skin the more it smells like a scented lotion. I don't get milk or pastry, or any of the chai spice at this point. At an hour, a sweet, creamy raspberry; still reminds me of a scented lotion, a bit bath-producty for me. At 4 hrs, a very faint sweet raspberry. Creamy in the sense that it's not sharp at all. Barely there but very pleasant. 6/10

YOUR SKELETON IS ALWAYS WET Pistachio and almond with exotic spices.

• In jar: Nutty! Close to what I hoped for, definitely pistachio/almond extract with a little hint of spice. Wet on skin, like huffing an extract bottle ach! That's a plus for me haha. Dries down to be very faint, mostly spices. This reminds me more of some chai blends I've had than Cream Tea does. At an hour, mostly dry spices, like a spice cabinet for only sweet bakes. I think the nuts are presenting as bottles of extract in that same cabinet, but definitely not the stars. 4 hrs: very faint, more of the nuts now but it's a generic non-spice sweetness, only vaguely nutty and kind of black peppery 5/10

COVEN A cauldron of herbs float in black, golden, and white ambers. Fir needles, cedarwood, and autumn leaves against a backdrop of pumpkin spice and sassafras.

• Definitely get a dark green foresty scent with a soft herbal element; a vague sweetness that is nondescript light spice, maybe the sassafras. Started promisingly dark-wet-forest but then turns into a barely-there high end/sexy soap, maybe that's ambecedar. Maybe good for soapy folk, not for me! 4/10

AMAZONIA Pear, fig, blueberry, ylang ylang.

• So so sweet, almost like one of those shark or frog gummy candies, gummy life savers, chewy gummy bears. No specific fruits identifiable. On skin, there's something musty to the fruitiness, maybe like a plasticky scent. I could almost pretend to smell pear, but it's not good 1/10

SMOKE AND DECAY Warm snickerdoodle cookies dipped in buttercream frosting, campfire wood smoke, crisp red apple, Indian sandalwood, a freshly poured oatmeal stout, orange spiced chai tea.

• Yummm sweet baking spices, definitely like a dark molasses spice cake in the jar (but the carrier smell is bleh). Wet on skin it's immediately a more realistic foody spice, but with a warm wood. After a minute the spice blooms off and there's something almost floral about it? Definitely get a bit of the orange, maybe cookie dough. 8/10

VENOM Oud wood, smoked patchouli, coal, freshly paved tar, cedarwood.

• WOW!! Smells like a sweet burning tire?? Maybe in a good way?? I want to smell it on a boy. Hmm but not good after all. Disappears almost entirely, fades to a hard to detect sun-sweet fresh asphalt. So hard to pick up though. 1/10

HOCUS POCUS Wormwood, bitter almond, figs, violets, nicotina, sparkling aldehyde.

• The wormwood is giving thin and clean-sweet like a not-quite almond extract. However, once this dries it's straight up Dove soap. It's so spot on idk what else to say! Another one for the soap lovers. 3/10

Edit to add: No alcohol, no smoking. I do have hEDS and possibly MCAS in case that may be relevant.
Hello,
I had my furthest back upper molar pulled last week. It took two appointments because the root was touching my sinus cavity. It sounds like my sinus cavity is still intact but my dentist today (four days after final extraction appointment) told me I had dry socket after I came in suspecting an infection.
I could taste and feel a warm, nasty substance draining from my tooth starting Friday (10th) and started noticing a foul oder and taste in my mouth Saturday. Sunday I woke up with very severe flu-like symptoms (no fever but I was taking lots of OTC pain relievers that also combat fevers) and started getting concerned that this was an infection. My extraction site itself doesn’t hurt much. I have some ear and neck pain, and smiling or opening my mouth wide hurts but otherwise it’s just mildly achy, which is why I hadn’t suspected dry socket. I haven’t taken any pain relievers at all today (hoping to catch whether or not I have a fever) and there still hasn’t been much pain.
About an hour after they applied a dry socket “paste” I started to feel a little better, AND I’d been out of work for several days so I’m not sure how I could have gotten sick, so I’m wondering if it’s possible for dry socket to manifest like an illness rather than pain? Maybe my sickness is unrelated and I’m just lucky it doesn’t hurt as bad? I just wanted to get some other thoughts or experiences.

Gonna preface this by saying we are both dating for marriage in the next 6 months, she is perfect in everyway for me, imagine the person of your dreams, now that's her. She works as an emergency hospital nurse in a rough part of town working three, 12 hour shifts from 3pm-3am. We've been talking for about 2 months now with very little physical intimacy so things don't lead to sex. We've talked about our past and how we both used to smoke weed years ago and how we both quit. Well yesterday while laying on the couch together we kissed for the first time and I tasted weed/cigarettes. I asked her about it and she acted dumb until she eventually confessed that she smokes about 3 times a week after her shifts at the hospital. The reason she kept it from me is because she planned on quitting the habit once we got married because I would allow her to work a less stressful schedule and location. Personally I'm not a fan on habitual smoking, once in a while doesn't bother me but multiple times a week can be worrisome also I don't like the smell/taste of it from her mouth. Should I just trust that she will give it up?
Like I said I completely understand why she smokes now and told her to do whatever keeps her sane, but once her life does get easier will it be hard to give it up.
One more thing to mention she divorced her ex for drinking and smoking weed but after she started this job she started smoking to cope with the stress with intentions of giving it up once her life normalized.

I went through a very serious gambling addiction that destroyed my entire life and kept me in 150k debt. (average salary is 900 or less in my country so it's a massive debt) Problem is I ruined my buisness and dont have any qualification to get in to another job.
I used to run a phone repaisales shop, Kept the shop open after my family found out about my gambling addiction, and made some money of repairing phones because that doesnt require a big capital but 3 weeks ago or so the phone suppliers who owes me lots of money started putting alot of pressure on me and I can't keep the shop open anymore.
Wife was so supportive at first, understood its more of a mental decease dnd self destruct than me fucking my life over on purpose. Dad said he would help with paying back my debt, not only him but other family members were supportive too...
I stopped gambling ever since, it wasn't easy at all and still not easy especially now after everyone simply started preying on me.
Wife now treats me like a fucking piece of trash lying on the ground, reminding me that I destroyed my life every now and then. Dad no longer willing to help with paying back the debt... it's ok to not help me or support me, I don't deserve any of that. Im accused of playing the victim card because I wake up late and dont work. well I wake up late because I cant fucking sleep, im so depressed and fighting suicidal thoughts every second. Even when I fall asleep most of my dreams (nightmares) are about suicide. Maybe I lay in bed for many hours but Im not really sleeping, i am half awake most of the time. I dont work because I seriously cant find any semi-well paying jobs. I have no qualifications or experience but in phone repairs and this field is over saturated in my country and people are closing their shops and looking for other opportunities.
I wish everyone fucks right off, I didnt ask for people support because I know I fucked up so bad, but reminding me of my fuck up in every opportunity you get is so damn devastating. I dont have a magic stick to fix all of my problems in a short amount of time. It's a shame how humans love preying on the weak. Even the people you though would never let you down...
Sorry but I needed to vent somewhere, it's 5am and I can't sleep again...

Okay so I know people are going to see that title and immediately think “wannabe” but please hear me out. There’s a lot of backstory in this.
I 21m think I might have ADHD but I’m confused, lost, I don’t know where to start and I don’t want to embarrass myself and just turn out “I’m normal.”
I have a somewhat regular life now. I live alone, pay my bills, work, socialise, etc. However recently I’ve been overthinking a lot about my lifestyle and I just am unsure what to do. For example, my sleep schedule is royally fucked. I can’t sleep for the life of me. I feel uncomfortable if I move a smidge and just start thinking about stupid shit and fantasies until my body is quite literally exhausted enough to sleep. Which results in me then getting up at a random time 4 hours later. Can’t go back to sleep but will then sleep again 3 hours later for another 4 hours. I have to just lay there for hours on end to get a “good nights sleep.” Then at work I’m so underwhelmed and feel a force to work. I feel like I have to force myself to work or I won’t do it. I’m so bad at finishing things. I prepare things and make a plan in my head but it takes me double the time to actually finish it because I just get so bored and then have to force myself to do it again. I’ve also felt unmotivated recently and to be truthful it’s because this is the longest period I’ve had at work where I have not been promoted. Just plain feeling what’s the point at the moment. And the coffee. I’m mugging the company off completely. If I don’t have 3 I will just lollope.
Outside of work I also am backed up on so much stuff I have to do. I have my gym membership I haven’t cancelled yet. I haven’t cleaned my bathroom which I said I’d do 2 weeks ago. I haven’t sent my mum the bedsheets I saw that she wanted yet. I haven’t organised my washing properly in weeks. Just so many task that take so long to do for no reason at all and I can’t explain it. I could be lazy but I just can’t seem to do them on time. Don’t get me started on Christmas. Every year I am running around on the last week looking for anything. I left it so late last year I didnt even have any Christmassy wrapping paper. I also don’t know if this is a thing but if I enjoy a song I will play it over and over and over again until I will randomly no longer like it. I will replay the song so many times until I don’t get any enjoyment from it at all.
Now for some backstory. When I was around 12 I started getting panic attacks. I have anxiety and a panic disorder which I have been diagnosed with. My mum then started to notice difference with me and spoke with the family worker I had at the time. I had troubles in school and they suspected at the time I had autism. My family worker was a very nice lady and hope she is doing well but was very unsure if it was autism at the time, however suggested to my mum that I might be masking. At 12 this made no sense to me at all but I can see what she meant at the time. It took 2 years to get me referred and I went to get diagnosed. I just remember this woman giving me a book and asking me to explain the pictures and then pick an object out of a box and then talk about my school life. I didn’t lie, I was an utter shit show. I was expelled from 2 schools at that point. After that was done it took another month until my mum got the news that I did not have autism. I just remember her being devastated and confused on what was wrong with me. I then continued being a shit, until I turned into a bigger shit. I started smoking and drinking and then bam kicked out my 3rd school by age 15. I was then enrolled into a school for kids who had previously been bullied or suffer with other disabilities which make it no longer possible for them to attend mainstream schools. I remember her having to apply for this thing with the council so my education was paid for “truthfully I think I still have that document standing to this day.” This school offered lessons either one on one with a teacher or small groups. They also offered students with trained therapists and my one was an absolute gem. He enjoyed my company and I enjoyed his. A few months went by and me, my mum, my head teacher, another teacher and my therapist were in this meeting. I don’t remember much about it just shit I didn’t bother to listen to. However my therapist suggested to my mum that I might have ADHD and spoke with her about symptoms he had noticed which I didn’t even really pay much attention to. My mum flat out said no and said she wasn’t going to wait another 2 years for me to get seen to. So I continued to live my life yet again, get head boy, become a mentor, run an afterschool club, attend music, photography and art club. Then just randomly dropped out. Don’t know why I did this.
I just don’t know where to start, how do I even go about it. Do I just ring my doctors and say I think I have this? What if I look like a complete idiot? I just am so confused and lost and scared and where to start? I just can’t keep living like this I just want a bit of normality in my life and am just so tired of being like this.

I'm a 30 year old guy. White, with a body type of 'shops at Casual XL', 5'10, and I have long hair and a beard.
My interests are gaming, long walks (I'm a pretty avid Pokemon Go player), window shopping (resale shops, electronic stores, even Walmart, why not?), music (90s/00s alternative, metal, classic rock, although I dabble in another of other genres too), bass guitar (I'm trash but hey it's a hobby lol), writing, standup comedy (Bill Burr, Dave Chappelle, etc), and of course doomscrolling while appreciating awful memes.
Contrary to advice on the matter, I'm upfront about the fact I've never had a relationship of any kind. If that scares you away, I'm not sure what good hiding it would be anyway. I'm honest and loyal, sometimes to a fault it turns out.
As for what I'm looking for? Ideally someone within a few years of me in age (25 to 35? Not a hard limit, though, if you're close to that feel free to hit me up). I'd like someone who lives pretty close to me, like say within an hour of Hammond, Indiana. If you ARE outside that range though and I sound interesting hit me up though lol.
Whether it's casual or long-term, bottom line I'm lonely and want some intimacy in my life. Someone to send good morning and good night texts to. Someone whose selfies put a smile on my face when I'm not feeling it.
If some of the following sounds like you:

• walking around, checking out stores, and people-watching
• fan of Jon Stewart or John Oliver
• voted for Bernie
• 90s alternative like Pearl Jam
• 80s metal (listening to Motorhead as I type lol)
• standup comedy like George Carlin
• gaming (Lucio/Moria main here)
• shitposting

hit me up, let's see where it goes. I've been exceedingly down and lonely lately so worst case scenario we could be Facebook friends. Best case scenario? Let's see where life takes us.

Selling my personal collection. Over 800 Games. Sorry my bad english. Paypal ff. Free Shipping over $100. Sorry i know this list will hurt eyes. I don't have a computer to edit it well. More photos at request. Offers are welcome. Most of these Prices are based on Pricharting (sorry im lazy to put my prices for these 800 games) i would like to sell this has a lot but im from Puerto Rico so thats likely impossible.
https://imgur.com/a/ntp4d6Q
Nintendo Switch
13 Sentinels: Aegis Rim CIB+ 32.92 1971 Project Helios New 15.41 Boy and His Blob New 50.49 Little Golf Journey New 29.62 Robot Named Fight [Premium Edition] New 50.5 Adventure Time: Pirates of the Enchiridion New 25.68 AeternoBlade II New 35.5 Afterparty New 38 Aggelos New 38.22 AI: The Somnium Files CIB+ 60.5 AI: The Somnium Files CIB+ 60.5 AI: The Somnium Files - nirvanA Initiative CIB+ 40 Alex Kidd in Miracle World DX New 18.98 Alwa's Collection New 25.62 American Hero New 40.49 Ancestors Legacy New 24.07 Annapurna Interactive [Deluxe Limited Edition Collection] New 372.64 ANNO: Mutationem [Limited Run] New 69.5 Ape Out [Special Reserve] New 49.13 Ara Fell & Rise of the Third Power New 57.24 Arcade Spirits New 20 Archvale New 51.25 ARMS CIB+ 30.5 Ary and the Secret of Seasons New 12.52 Arzette: The Jewel of Faramore New 74.23 Assassin's Creed: The Rebel Collection CIB+ 17.48 Astalon: Tears of the Earth New 50.63 Astral Chain New 48.99 Astronite New 19.48 Atelier Ryza 2: Lost Legends & the Secret Fairy New 86.98 Atelier Ryza: Ever Darkness and the Secret Hideout CIB+ 49.5 Atelier Ryza: Ever Darkness and the Secret Hideout New 60.1 Attack on Titan 2: Final Battle New 74.23 Axiom Verge 1 & 2 Double Pack New 74.5 Azure Striker Gunvolt 3 New 48.5 Azure Striker Gunvolt: Striker Pack CIB+ 25.79 Balan Wonderworld New 11.77 Baldur's Gate and Baldur's Gate II: Enhanced Editions New 140.05 Battle Chef Brigade Deluxe CIB+ 32.61 Battle Princess Madelyn: Royal Edition New 52.88 Bayonetta New 40.76 Bayonetta 2 CIB+ 35.5 Bayonetta 3 New 34.67 Bayonetta Origins: Cereza and the Lost Demon New 32.5 Black Bird New 55.5 Blade Runner: Enhanced Edition New 48.72 Blasphemous CIB+ 108.49 Blaster Master Zero New 44.14 Blaster Master Zero II New 40.49 Blaster Master Zero III New 34.5 Blazing Beaks New 30.02 Blazing Chrome CIB+ 65.92 Bloodrayne 1 & 2: Revamped Dual Pack w/ Slipcover New 100.47 BloodRayne Betrayal: Fresh Bites New 40.49 Bloodstained: Curse Of The Moon 2 New 28.49 Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night New 21.23 Blossom Tales II: The Minotaur Prince New 46.48 Blossom Tales: The Sleeping King CIB+ 150.47 Blue Fire CIB+ 28.49 Blue Reflection: Second Light New 59.83 Bomb Chicken CIB+ 38.14 Bravely Default II New 29.4 BROFORCE [SWITCH RESERVE] New 53.82 Bug Fables: The Everlasting Sapling New 55.93 Bugsnax CIB+ 30.77 Burnout Paradise Remastered CIB+ 14.98 BUTCHER New 36.9 Cannon Dancer: Osman New 54 Captain Toad: Treasure Tracker CIB+ 30.49 Captain Tsubasa: Rise of New Champions New 26.09 Card Shark Collector's Edition New 47.5 Carrion: Special Reserve Edition New 50.6 Castlevania Anniversary Collection New 50.49 Cat Girl Without Salad: Amuse-Bouche New 40.97 Cat Quest + Cat Quest II: Pawsome Pack New 49.5 Cathedral New 66.91 Cave Story+ CIB+ 34.49 Celeste New 62.39 Chicken Police - Paint it RED! CIB+ 13.25 Children of Morta CIB+ 22.09 Children of Zodiarcs New 44.77 Citizens Unite! Earth X Space New 29.49 Coffee Talk New 42.15 COGEN: Sword of Rewind & Gunvolt Chronicles: Luminous Avenger iX 2 Double Pack New 80.48 Collar X Malice New 30.49 Collection of Mana New 25.5 Contra Anniversary Collection New 41.45 Contra Anniversary Collection New 41.45 Cooking Mama: Cookstar New 36.11 Corpse Killer: 25th Anniversary Edition New 42.7 Cosmo Dreamer & Like Dreamer: Double-D Collection New 25.00 Cris Tales New 13.99 Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII Reunion CIB+ 29 CrossCode New 52.99 Crossing Souls - Special Reserve New 40.00 Cruis'n Blast New 20.48 Crystal Crisis New 31.52 Cthulhu Saves Christmas New 45.17 Cult of the Lamb [Special Reserve] New 72.48 Dandara: Trials of Fear Edition CIB+ 41.29 Dark Devotion New 45.49 Darksiders Genesis CIB+ 18 Darkwood CIB+ 108.46 DARQ: Complete Edition New 38.97 Dawn of the Monsters New 50.36 Dead Cells: Return to Castlevania Edition New 32.01 Dead or School New 52.03 Deadly Premonition 2: A Blessing in Disguise CIB+ 16.77 Deadly Premonition Origins New 38.03 Death end re;Quest New 41.97 Death Road to Canada New 40 Death's Door [Special Reserve] New 33.03 Death's Gambit: Afterlife New 38.72 Demon Throttle [Reserve Edition] New 25.25 Demon Throttle [Reserve Edition] New 25.25 Demon Turf New 40.82 Demon's Tilt New 44.5 Deponia Collection New 83.14 Dex New 48.38 Diablo III: Eternal Collection New 25.77 Digimon Survive New 20.95 Dimension Drive [Limited Edition] New 65.48 Disaster Report 4: Summer Memories CIB+ 25.5 DISC ROOM [SWITCH RESERVE] New 38.69 Disgaea 5 Complete New 39.5 Disney Classic Games: Aladdin and the Lion King New 18.29 Disney Tsum Tsum Festival New 26.55 DISTRAINT Collection New 33.76 Divinity: Original Sin II - Definitive Edition New 180.49 Dodgeball Academia New 19.5 DoDonPachi Resurrection New 55.38 Doki Doki Literature Club Plus! New 30.49 Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze CIB+ 32.97 DOOM CIB+ 28.9 Doom 64 New 45.45 DOOM Eternal New 89 DOOM: The Classics Collection New 50.5 Double Dragon & Kunio-Kun Retro Brawler Bundle New 52.83 Double Dragon IV New 33.97 Double Dragon: Neon New 50.49 Downwell [Special Reserve Edition] New 75 Double Switch: 25th Anniversary Edition New 55.89 Dragon Ball Z: Kakarot + A New Power Awakens Set New 30.8 Dragon Quest Treasures New 29.53 Dragon Quest XI S: Echoes of an Elusive Age - Definitive Edition New 46.97 Dragon Star Varnir New 45.49 Dragon's Dogma: Dark Arisen CIB+ 24.74 Dragon's Lair Trilogy New 144.25 DRAINUS New 63.39 Dreamscaper New 44.72 Dusk New 44.49 Eastward CIB+ 20.3 Eldest Souls New 45.5 Elliot Quest New 28.48 Enclave HD New 52.67 Ender Lilies: Quietus of the Knights New 63.97 Endling - Extinction is Forever New 25.76 Epic Chef New 15.57 Espgaluda II New 60.27 Fairy Fencer F: Advent Dark Force New 48.41 FAR: Lone Sails New 49.69 Fast RMX New 71.73 Fatal Twelve New 44.49 Fault Milestone One New 28.49 Fight'N Rage New 45.49 FINAL FANTASY VII & VIII REMASTERED TWIN PACK CIB+ 37.63 Final Fantasy X / X-2 HD Remaster New 51.33 Final Fantasy XII: The Zodiac Age New 31.61 Fire Emblem Engage New 35.07 Fire Emblem Warriors: Three Hopes New 20.17 Fire Emblem: Three Houses New 45.45 Flinthook New 45.49 Flipping Death CIB+ 28.39 Foretales New 19.29 Forgotton Anne CIB+ 35.49 Fran Bow New 111.48 Freedom Finger CIB+ 77.4 Freedom Planet New 57.39 Furi CIB+ 48.64 Gal Metal: World Tour Edition CIB+ 17.69 Garden Story New 46.5 Gato Roboto [Special Reserve Edition] New 55.49 Ghost 1.0 + Unepic Collection: Standard Edition New 80.5 Ghost of a Tale New 66.61 Going Under New 37.47 Golf Story New 82.75 Gotta Protectors: Cart of Darkness New 45.35 Grandia HD Collection New 82.51 GrimGrimoire OnceMore [Deluxe Edition] New 42.33 GRIS [Limited Special Reserve] CIB+ 85.25 Guacamelee! One-Two Punch Collection CIB+ 87.57 Gunbrick: Reloaded New 24.68 Gunlord X New 107.79 Guns, Gore & Cannoli 1 & 2 New 105.28 Gunvolt Chronicles: Luminous Avenger iX New 84.5 Gyakuten Saiban 123: Naruhodo Selection New 41.49 Hades New 39.19 Haven New 45.49 Heaven's Vault New 32.15 Hero Must Die. Again New 56.5 Heroland Knowble Edition New 18.63 Hollow Knight CIB+ 31.5 Horgihugh and Friends New 28.18 Hot Wheels Unleashed New 22.03 Hotline Miami Collection [Special Reserve] New 54.36 Hyper Light Drifter [Special Edition] New 72.29 Hyrule Warriors: Definitive Edition CIB+ 49.69 Ib New 55.46 Ikenfell New 42.56 Immortals Fenyx Rising New 15.22 In Sound Mind: Deluxe Edition New 21.81 Indivisible New 19.41 Infernax New 50.5 Inscryption [Special Reserve] New 283.5 Ion Fury New 35.35 ITTA CIB+ 45.74 ITTA [Steelbook Edition] New 65.84 Ittle Dew 2+ New 43.45 Jamestown+ New 50.98 Joe Dever's Lone Wolf New 65.54 Katamari Damacy REROLL New 23.45 Katanakami New 42.3 Kaze and the Wild Masks New 32.44 KeyWe New 25.49 Killer Queen Black New 16.13 King's Bounty II New 17.85 Kingdom Hearts: Melody of Memory New 20.59 Kingdoms of Amalur: Re-Reckoning CIB+ 19.98 Kirby and the Forgotten Land CIB+ 37.97 Knights and Bikes New 45.49 Kotodama: The 7 Mysteries of Fujisawa New 19.45 KUNAI New 40.5 L.A. Noire CIB+ 29.99 Lair of the Clockwork God New 39.13 Layers of Fear: Legacy New 147.86 LEGO Star Wars: The Skywalker Saga New 20.48 Little Nightmares II CIB+ 20.75 Live A Live CIB+ 26.42 Lonely Mountains: Downhill SRG#46 New 86.79 Loop Hero CIB+ 35.47 Loop Hero [Collectors Edition] New 80.75 Love Esquire [Limited Edition] New 90.5 LoveKami Trilogy New 45.87 Luigi's Mansion 3 CIB+ 33.25 Lumines Remastered New 32.5 LUNARK New 49.52 Mario + Rabbids Sparks of Hope CIB+ 15.42 Mario + Rabbids: Kingdom Battle CIB+ 12.5 Mario Kart 8 Deluxe New 38.35 Mario Party: Superstars CIB+ 39.5 Marvel Ultimate Alliance 3: The Black Order New 41.5 Mary Skelter 2 New 45.49 Mary Skelter: Finale New 49.39 Mato Anomalies New 19.73 Mega Man 11 New 20.48 Mega Man Zero/ZX Legacy Collection CIB+ 24.5 Megadimension Neptunia VII New 45.5 Metroid Dread CIB+ 35.34 Metroid Prime Remastered New 34.34 Mighty Gunvolt Burst New 44.45 Mighty Switch Force! Collection CIB+ 45.49 Ministry of Broadcast New 26.72 Minoria New 50.47 Miracle Snack Shop [Limited Edition] New 35.00 Moero Chronicle Hyper New 90.35 Moero Crystal H New 50.77 Momodora: Reverie Under the Moonlight New 71.68 MONARK Deluxe Edition New 37 Monster Boy and the Cursed Kingdom New 78.59 Monster Hunter Generations Ultimate New 42.69 Monster Hunter Rise CIB+ 15.49 Monster Hunter Stories 2: Wings of Ruin New 31.49 Monster Sanctuary New 58.46 Monstrum New 38.5 Mother Russia Bleeds [Special Reserve] New 59.25 Mother Russia Bleeds [Special Reserve] New 59.25 Ms. Splosion Man CIB+ 31.98 Mulaka New 60.00 Murder By Numbers Collectors Edition New 80.36 Mushihimesama New 60.7 My Friend Pedro [Special Reserve Edition] New 79.7 Narita Boy New 45.55 NEO: The World Ends With You CIB+ 20.5 NeoGeo Pocket Color Selection Vol. 1 New 43.06 Neon Abyss New 42.38 Neversong & Pinstripe CIB+ 37.5 New Pokémon Snap CIB+ 31.81 New Super Lucky's Tale New 33.59 New Super Mario Bros. U Deluxe New 39.5 Ni no Kuni II: Revenant Kingdom - Prince's Edition New 18.14 Ni no Kuni: Wrath of the White Witch New 26.5 NieR: Automata - The End of YoRHa Edition New 39.5 Night in the Woods New 59.92 Night Trap: 25th Anniversary Edition New 56.06 Ninja Gaiden: Master Collection New 50.42 No Man's Sky CIB+ 26.25 No More Heroes CIB+ 40.5 No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle CIB+ 35.92 No More Heroes III CIB+ 15.5 Ocean's Heart New 53.33 Octahedron New 45.43 Octopath Traveler New 52.43 Octopath Traveler II New 39.99 Oddworld - Collection New 36.25 à Œkami HD New 32.99 One Step From Eden New 34.15 Oniken + Odallus Collection New 36.51 Opus Collection CIB+ 22.49 Ori: The Collection New 28.97 Othercide New 32.45 Outlast: Bundle of Terror / Outlast 2 CIB+ 277.52 Overlord: Escape from Nazarick New 35.97 Owlboy CIB+ 16.48 Oxenfree New 99.53 Panzer Dragoon New 40.5 Panzer Paladin New 48.13 Paper Mario: The Origami King CIB+ 36.5 Pathway New 27.6 Phoenotopia: Awakening [Premium Edition] New 114.25 Pikmin 3 Deluxe CIB+ 39.75 Pikmin 4 New 42.79 Piofiore: Fated Memories New 27.95 PixelJunk Eden 2 New 25.49 Pocky & Rocky Reshrined New 25.49 Pokémon Brilliant Diamond CIB+ 32.75 Pokémon Legends: Arceus New 41.19 Pokémon Mystery Dungeon: Rescue Team DX CIB+ 40.5 Pokémon Sword CIB+ 30.26 Pokémon Violet New 44.5 Pokémon: Let's Go, Pikachu! CIB+ 35.47 Postal Redux New 25.5 PowerSlave: Exhumed New 65.06 Prinny Presents NIS Classics Volume 2 [Deluxe Edition] New 43.99 Prodeus New 40.67 Project Warlock New 67.14 Puyo Puyo Tetris New 17.5 Q.U.B.E. 2 New 51.32 Quake New 38.49 Radiant Silvergun New 58.09 Rainbow Billy: The Curse of the Leviathan New 23.82 Razion EX New 137.71 realMyst: Masterpiece Edition New 78.08 République: Anniversary Edition New 35.49 Return of the Obra Dinn New 58.18 Return to Monkey Island CIB+ 43.09 Return to Shironagasu Island CIB+ 28.5 Risk of Rain 2 New 14.7 River City Girls CIB+ 80.23 River City Girls 2 New 50.5 River City Girls [PAX Variant] New 142.6 River City Girls Zero New 44.49 River City: Rival Showdown New 30.49 Rogue Heroes: Ruins of Tasos CIB+ 46.5 Roki CIB+ 39.07 Rolling Sky Collection CIB+ 20.00 Root Film New 34.09 RUINER [SWITCH RESERVE] New 54.47 Rune Factory 3 Special New 23.41 Rune Factory 3 Special New 23.41 Rune Factory 4 Special [Archival Edition] New 153.5 Sakuna: Of Rice and Ruin New 27.5 Sally Face [Deluxe Edition] New 224.81 Sam & Max Save the World New 43.5 Sam & Max: Beyond Time and Space Remastered New 44 Samurai Jack: Battle Through Time New 70.48 Save me Mr Tako: Definitive Edition New 33.5 Scott Pilgrim vs. The World: The Game - Complete Edition New 32.49 Sea Horizon [Limited Edition] New 42.49 Sea of Solitude: The Director's Cut New 20.00 Seabed New 40.42 SeaBed [Limited Edition] New 135.38 Senran Kagura Reflexions New 129.74 Senren * Banka New 86.76 SENSEs: Midnight [Limited Edition] New 47.43 Serious Sam Collection [Switch Reserve] New 60.49 Seven Pirates H New 51.25 Seven Pirates H New 51.25 Seven Pirates H New 51.25 Shadow Man Remastered New 48.39 Shadowgate New 62.5 Shadowrun Trilogy New 56.64 Shadows of Adam New 34.49 Shadowverse: Champion's Battle New 21.95 Shantae New 39.34 Shantae and the Pirate's Curse New 381.21 Shantae and the Pirate's Curse Box 49.62 Shantae and the Seven Sirens New 50.2 Shantae: Half-Genie Hero [Ultimate Edition] New 38.2 Shantae: Risky's Revenge New 38.51 Shaq Fu: A Legend Reborn New 19.57 Shikhondo: Soul Eater New 34.44 Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne HD Remaster New 25.5 Shin Megami Tensei V New 22.38 Shin Megami Tensei V New 22.38 Shining Resonance Refrain [Draconic Launch Edition] New 48.6 Signalis New 32.03 Sine Mora EX New 23.02 Skelattack New 50.49 Slime-san New 43.74 Smile For Me New 46.94 SNK Heroines Tag Team Frenzy New 29.15 Sol Cresta: Dramatic Edition New 45.48 Sonic Colors Ultimate CIB+ 15.48 Sonic Frontiers CIB+ 21.62 Sonic Mania New 16.51 Spiritfarer New 28.95 Splatoon 2 CIB+ 19.67 Splatoon 3 New 43.99 Star Wars Pinball New 19.72 Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic New 60.49 Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II - The Sith Lords New 59.79 Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II - The Sith Lords New 59.79 Star Wars: Republic Commando New 26.45 Steel Assault New 48 Streets of Rage 4 New 33.45 Strife: Veteran Edition New 37.72 Subnautica + Subnautica: Below Zero New 32.49 Super Blood Hockey New 60.96 Super Bomberman R New 20.42 Super Mario 3D All-Stars CIB+ 82.33 Super Mario 3D World + Bowser's Fury CIB+ 39.5 Super Mario Bros. Wonder CIB 38.99 Super Mario Maker 2 CIB+ 30.48 Super Mario Odyssey New 39.59 Super Mario RPG New 39.93 Super Meat Boy New 38.5 Super Meat Boy Forever New 25.98 Super Monkey Ball Banana Mania New 13.48 Super Smash Bros. Ultimate CIB+ 38.74 Supraland New 33.75 Sushi Striker: The Way of Sushido New 12.17 Taiko no Tatsujin Rhythm Festival New 15.5 Tails of Iron [Crimson Knight Edition] New 42.89 Tales of Vesperia: Definitive Edition New 30.41 Tandem: A Tale of Shadows New 20.48 Terraria New 24.66 Caligula Effect 2 New 56.3 Caligula Effect: Overdose New 61.95 DioField Chronicle CIB+ 25.46 Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim CIB+ 35.31 Falconeer: Warrior Edition New 18.88 Friends Of Ringo Ishikawa New 26.73 Great Ace Attorney Chronicles CIB+ 30.98 Knight Witch Deluxe Edition New 32.07 Legend of Heroes: Trails of Cold Steel III - Extracurricular Edition CIB+ 31.77 Legend of Tianding New 51.61 Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild CIB+ 34 Legend of Zelda: Link's Awakening CIB+ 32.57 Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword HD CIB+ 31.24 Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom New 47.46 Letter: A Horror Visual Novel [Limited Edition] New 73.75 The Messenger [Special Reserve Games Edition] New 280.00 Missing CIB+ 35.5 Mummy Demastered New 57.71 Red Lantern New 58.5 RED STRINGS CLUB [SWITCH RESERVE] New 38.5 Silver Case 2425 Deluxe Edition CIB 35.5 TakeOver New 47.41 Talos Principle New 51.62 Touryst New 68.88 Wonderful 101: Remastered New 23.5 World Ends with You: Final Remix New 53.95 There Is No Game: Wrong Dimension New 53.51 Thumper New 45.45 Time on Frog Island CIB+ 17.43 Timespinner [Limited Run] CIB+ 77.28 Tiny Barbarian DX New 33.97 To The Moon New 67.98 ToeJam & Earl: Back in the Groove! CIB+ 49.86 Tokyo Mirage Sessions #FE Encore New 66.72 Tokyo Mirage Sessions #FE Encore New 66.72 TowerFall New 45.5 Transistor CIB+ 61.01 Travis Strikes Again: No More Heroes CIB+ 24.99 Treasures Of The Aegean New 17.98 Triangle Strategy New 37.47 Trigger Witch New 34.59 Trigger Witch - Limited Edition New 57.66 Trover Saves the Universe New 37.76 Turok / Turok 2: Seeds of Evil New 167.4 Twin Blades of the Three Kingdoms New 50.5 Two Point Hospital New 26.5 UnderMine New 51.08 Unravel Two CIB+ 18.35 Unreal Life New 39.15 Unsighted New 47.2 Untitled Goose Game New 22.45 Valfaris New 39.64 Valis: The Fantasm Soldier Collection New 70.61 Valis: The Fantasm Soldier Collection II New 50.5 Valkyria Chronicles 4 New 66.81 Very Very Valet New 17.77 Wandersong CIB+ 33.99 Warborn New 16.6 Warhammer 40,000: Mechanicus CIB+ 21 WarioWare: Get it Together! CIB+ 24.55 West of Dead New 39.1 Wizard of Legend New 62.66 Wonder Boy: The Dragon's Trap New 39.14 World Of Simulators New 45 Wreckfest New 25.5 Wulverblade New 68.83 Xenoblade Chronicles 2 Loose 42.6 Xenoblade Chronicles 2 CIB+ 48.49 Xenoblade Chronicles 2: Torna the Golden Country New 58.45 Xenoblade Chronicles 3 New 39.49 Xenoblade Chronicles: Definitive Edition New 45.5 Xtreme Sports New 50.5 Yoku's Island Express CIB+ 35.5 Yooka-Laylee and the Impossible Lair New 35.5 Yoshi's Crafted World CIB+ 36.75 Young Souls New 34.49 Yu-Gi-Oh! Legacy of the Duelist: Link Evolution CIB+ 17.69 Yuppie Psycho: Executive Edition (Elite Edition) New 45.49 Yurukill: The Calumniation Games (Deluxe Edition) New 20.73 Zombies Ate My Neighbors and Ghoul Patrol New 40.09
PS4
88 Antarctica New 45.00 Antartica 88 [Variant Cover] New 185.5 Deadpool CIB+ 76.33 Deadpool CIB+ 76.33 Death Park New 75.48 Death Park New 75.48 Death Park New 75.48 Death Park New 75.48 Digimon Survive New 16.55 Divinity: Original Sin II - Definitive Edition New 71 Doki Doki Literature Club Plus! New 21.17 Helldivers [Super-Earth Ultimate Edition] CIB+ 62.97 Minecraft: Story Mode - A Telltale Games Series - The Complete Adventure CIB+ 58.41 Outriders: Worldslayer New 18.48 Revenge of The Bird King New 31.99 Saints Row: The Third Remastered New 15.1 Senran Kagura Burst Re:Newal [At the Seams Edition] New 60.49 Senran Kagura Burst Re:Newal [Tailor Made Edition] New 47.99 Senran Kagura: Peach Beach Splash (No Shirt, No Shoes, All Service Edition) New 71.5 Shadow Warrior 2 [Special Reserve Edition] New 235.52 Super Perils of Baking Special Edition [SEGA Outerbox] New 200.5 Swords of Ditto: Mormo's Curse [Special Reserve Edition] New 47.1 Tamashii New 734.39 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutants in Manhattan CIB+ 51.58 Valkyria Chronicles Remastered Steelbook Edition New 30.45
Vita
2064: Read Only Memories New 67.97 88 Heroes New 40.6 99Vidas New 125.97 Hole New World New 48.82 Rose in the Twilight New 192 Winter's Daydream [Limited Edition] New 64.1 Aegis of Earth: Protonovus Assault New 26.49 Akiba's Beat New 30.25 Akiba's Trip: Undead & Undressed CIB+ 25.49 Alone With You New 38.5 Angry Birds Star Wars New 20.48 Another World: 20th Anniversary Edition New 40.49 Antiquia Lost New 34.75 Aqua Kitty: Milk Mine Defender DX New 51.5 Army Corps of Hell New 23.99 Asdivine Hearts New 35.46 Astro Aqua Kitty [Limited Edition] New 64.7 Atari Flashback Classics New 60.61 Atelier Escha & Logy Plus: Alchemists of the Dusk Sky (Limited Edition) New 168.49 Awesome Pea Collection [Limited Edition] CIB+ 40.1 Axiom Verge Multiverse Edition New 56.56 Back in 1995 [Limited Edition] New 191.4 Bard's Gold New 33 Bastion New 64.16 Batman: Arkham Origins Blackgate CIB+ 23.67 Bit.Trip Presents...Runner2: Future Legend of Rhythm Alien New 33.49 Bit.Trip Presents...Runner2: Future Legend of Rhythm Alien New 33.49 Bloodstained: Curse of the Moon New 118.23 Borderlands 2 CIB+ 23.49 Breach & Clear New 308.01 Broken Age New 33.77 Bunny Must Die: Chelsea and the 7 Devils New 95 Call of Duty: Black Ops Declassified CIB+ 22.29 Call of Duty: Black Ops Declassified Loose 18.98 Chaos;Child New 45.61 Chasm CIB+ 60.49 Child of Light CIB+ 24.56 Claire: Extended Cut CIB+ 35.17 Code:Realize - Future Blessings Loose 14.9 Code:Realize - Guardian of Rebirth New 25.5 Code:Realize - Guardian of Rebirth Loose 14.2 Conga Master Go! [Limited Edition] New 51.83 Corpse Party: Blood Drive New 58.77 Cosmic Star Heroine CIB+ 43.25 Criminal Girls 2: Party Favors CIB+ 74.09 Criminal Girls: Invite Only CIB+ 54.49 Croixleur Sigma New 40.49 Cursed Castilla EX [Limited Edition] New 60.5 Curses 'N Chaos New 38.72 Damascus Gear: Operation Osaka New 40.51 Damascus Gear: Operation Tokyo New 41 Danganronpa 2: Goodbye Despair Loose 19.41 Danganronpa 2: Goodbye Despair Loose 19.41 Danganronpa Another Episode: Ultra Despair Girls New 31.5 Danganronpa V3: Killing Harmony CIB+ 58.89 Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc CIB+ 25.97 Dariusburst: Chronicle Saviours New 47.38 Deadbolt New 42.44 Death Mark CIB+ 23.22 Death Tales [Limited Edition] New 40.4 Deemo: The Last Recital New 34.22 Defender's Quest: Valley of the Forgotten New 37.86 Demon Gaze Loose 22.22 Demon Gaze CIB+ 25.81 Demon Gaze II New 74.66 Demon's Tier+ [Limited Edition] CIB+ 55.49 Dengeki Bunko: Fighting Climax CIB+ 25.5 Devious Dungeon - Limited Edition CIB+ 67.38 Devious Dungeon 2 [Limited Edition] New 84.5 Digimon Story: Cyber Sleuth CIB+ 65.9 Disgaea 4: A Promise Revisited CIB+ 25.49 Dokuro New 52.94 Dragon Fantasy: The Black Tome of Ice New 34.5 Dragon Fantasy: The Volumes of Westeria New 40.49 Dragon Sinker: Descendants of Legend New 35.5 Dungeon Travelers 2: The Royal Library & The Monster Seal CIB+ 53 Dynasty Warriors: Next Loose 16.66 Earth Defense Force 2: Invaders from Planet Space New 28.19 EMMA: Lost in Memories [Limited Edition] New 52.49 Exile's End New 39.65 Exist Archive: The Other Side of The Sky Loose 18.48 Fate/Extella: The Umbral Star Noble Phantasm Edition New 46.26 Fernz Gate New 30.69 Final Fantasy X / X-2 HD Remaster Loose 25.49 Final Fantasy X-2 HD Remaster New 61.19 Forma.8 New 32.5 Freedom Wars CIB+ 13.48 Furwind [Limited Edition] CIB+ 40.5 Futuridium EP Deluxe New 45.97 Gal*Gun: Double Peace CIB+ 32.34 Ghoulboy [Limited Edition] New 160.5 God of War Collection New 74.75 Grand Kingdom New 47.6 Gravity Rush CIB+ 44.5 Guacamelee! New 70.48 Guard Duty [Limited Edition] CIB+ 47.38 Gundemoniums New 84.18 Gunhouse New 30.38 Habroxia New 129.94 Habroxia 2 [Limited Edition] New 65.5 Halloween Forever [Limited Edition] New 74.5 Home: A Unique Horror Adventure New 35.92 Horizon Chase Turbo [Limited Edition] New 76.81 Hot Shots Golf: World Invitational New 26.19 HtoL#NiQ The Firefly Diary: Limited Edition New 59.25 Hue New 40.5 Hyperdevotion Noire: Goddess Black Heart CIB+ 35.5 Hyperdimension Neptunia PP: Producing Perfection CIB+ 35.97 Hyperdimension Neptunia Re;Birth1 CIB+ 47.01 Hyperdimension Neptunia Re;Birth1 CIB+ 47.01 Hyperdimension Neptunia Re;Birth2: Sisters Generation CIB+ 60.49 Hyperdimension Neptunia Re;Birth2: Sisters Generation CIB+ 60.49 Hyperdimension Neptunia Re;Birth3: V Generation CIB+ 55.95 Hyperdimension Neptunia Re;Birth3: V Generation CIB+ 55.95 Hyperdimension Neptunia U: Action Unleashed CIB+ 43.81 Iconoclasts New 96.5 Indigo 7 : Quest for Love New ? Jak and Daxter Collection CIB+ 50.49 Jet Set Knights [Limited Edition] New 100.5 Jet Set Knights [Limited Edition] New 100.5 Just Ignore them + My Big Sister Collection New 60.49 Kawaii Deathu Desu New 45.5 Killzone: Mercenary Loose 24.49 Killzone: Mercenary CIB+ 32.68 Knightin' + [Limited Edition] New 60.45 Knytt Underground New 128.14 La-Mulana Ex New 38.03 LEGO Batman 2: DC Super Heroes Loose 11.33 LEGO Jurassic World CIB+ 13.44 LEGO Ninjago: Shadow of Ronin Loose 17.12 LEGO Star Wars: The Force Awakens New 28.75 LEGO Star Wars: The Force Awakens Loose 12.21 LEGO The Lord of the Rings Loose 10.49 Lone Survivor: The Director's Cut New 42.49 Luckslinger [Limited Edition] New 60.41 Lumines: Electronic Symphony New 18.61 Mary Skelter: Nightmares CIB+ 92.87 MegaTagmension Blanc + Neptune VS Zombies New 37.58 MeiQ: Labyrinth of Death CIB+ 25.39 Mercenary Kings: Reloaded Edition [Limited Edition] New 106.71 Metagal [Limited Edition] CIB+ 100.35 Metal Gear Solid HD Collection CIB+ 46.49 Metal Slug 3 New 115.48 Mind Zero CIB+ 20.48 Mooseman [Limited Edition] New 119.05 Mortal Kombat CIB+ 26.99 MotoGP 13 CIB+ 23.83 MUSYNX New 50.49 Muv-Luv New 53.36 Muv-Luv Alternative New 66.95 Muv-Luv Complete Set New 90.5 My Aunt is a Witch [Limited Edition] New 55.5 Mystery Chronicle: One Way Heroics New 27.94 Need for Speed: Most Wanted - A Criterion Game CIB+ 20.32 Neurovoider New 35.5 Nicole [Limited Edition] New 48.22 Night Trap: 25th Anniversary Edition New 58.99 Nova-111 New 28.67 Nurse Love Addiction New 59.18 Nurse Love Syndrome New 50.49 Nurse Love Syndrome Loose 15.49 Oceanhorn: Monster of Uncharted Seas New 52 Octodad: Dadliest Catch New 46.36 Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee - New 'n' Tasty New 149.5 Oddworld: Munch's Oddysee HD New 52.5 Oddworld: Stranger's Wrath HD New 69.73 Odin Sphere Leifthrasir CIB+ 72.45 Odin Sphere Leifthrasir Loose 70.5 One More Dungeon CIB+ 60 Operation Abyss: New Tokyo Legacy CIB+ 31.5 Oreshika: Tainted Bloodlines New 93 Pantsu Hunter: Back to the 90s New 156.5 Papers, Please New 115.47 Pato Box [Limited Edition] New 73.23 Penny-Punching Princess New 45.41 Period: Cube - Shackles of Amadeus New 54.65 Persona 4 Golden Loose 25.37 Persona 4 Golden New 61.12 Persona 4: Dancing All Night - Disco Fever Edition New 145.5 Phantom Breaker: Battle Grounds New 53.5 Pix the Cat New 28.84 Plague Road New 43.4 PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale New 31.74 Proteus New 36.49 Psychedelica of the Ashen Hawk New 51.5 Psychedelica of the Ashen Hawk New 51.5 Psychedelica of the Black Butterfly CIB+ 33.57 Psycho-Pass Mandatory Happiness CIB+ 28.99 Pushy and Pully in Block Land New 70.45 Rabi-Ribi New 93.59 Rainbow Moon New 44.89 Ray Gigant New 102.84 Rayman Legends Loose 17.37 Rayman Origins CIB+ 16.71 Retro City Rampage DX [Re-Release] New 35.00 Revenant Dogma New 35.36 Revenant Saga New 29.44 Reverie [Limited Edition] CIB+ 43.49 Riddled Corpses EX New 40.49 Risk of Rain New 38 Rock Boshers DX New 29.34 Rocketbirds 2: Evolution New 55.5 Rocketbirds: Hardboiled Chicken New 43.2 Root Double [Xtend Edition] New 53.5 Root Letter New 46.11 Salt and Sanctuary New 100.49 Salt and Sanctuary New 100.49 Saturday Morning RPG New 50.49 Sayonara Umihara Kawase++ New 67.33 ScourgeBringer [Limited Edition] New 59.97 ScourgeBringer [Limited Edition] New 59.97 Senran Kagura Shinovi Versus: Let's Get Physical Edition New 115.5 Senran Kagura: Bon Appétit! New 150.44 Senran Kagura: Bon Appétit! Full Course - Collector's Edition New 185.13 Senran Kagura: Estival Versus Endless Summer Edition New 115.48 Sense: A Cyberpunk Ghost Story New 155.5 Severed [Limited Edition] New 100.81 Shakedown: Hawaii CIB+ 36.85 Shantae: Half-Genie Hero CIB+ 37.5 Shinobido 2: Revenge of Zen CIB+ 38.67 Shovel Knight New 96.49 Sid Meier's Civilization Revolution 2+ CIB+ 76.26 Silent Hill: Book of Memories CIB+ 76.38 Sir Eatsalot [Limited Edition] CIB+ 53.08 Siralim New 50.5 Siralim 2 New 30.49 Skullgirls: 2nd Encore New 52.81 Sky Force Anniversary New 75.48 Slain: Back From Hell [Signature Edition] New 76.5 Sly Cooper Collection CIB+ 52.27 Smart as... CIB+ 9.67 Soldner-X 2: Final Prototype New 44.12 Sonic & All-Stars Racing Transformed CIB+ 23.56 Sorcery Saga: Curse of the Great Curry God [Limited edition] New 80.5 Soul Sacrifice CIB+ 17.36 Soul Sacrifice Delta New 105.5 Spelunky New 70.5 Spy Hunter CIB+ 24.31 Stay [Limited Edition] New 130.5 Stealth Inc: A Clone in the Dark (Ultimate Edition) New 29.13 SteamWorld Dig New 55.72 SteamWorld Heist New 52.97 Steins;Gate CIB+ 30.58 Steins;Gate 0 CIB+ 29.49 Stranger of sword city limited edition New 63.57 Super Hydorah New 47.9 Super Meat Boy New 60.5 Super Mutant Alien Assault New 34.9 Super Skull Smash GO! 2 Turbo New 42.35 SUPERBEAT: XONiC New 28.49 Superdimension Neptune VS Sega Hard Girls New 58.5 Sword Art Online: Hollow Fragment New 65.48 Synergia [Limited Edition] New 110.49 Tachyon Project Limited Edition New 55.35 Takotan [Limited Edition] New 51.59 Tales from Space: Mutant Blobs Attack New 50.24 Tales of Hearts R CIB+ 69.48 Tales of Hearts R Loose 50.5 Task Force Kampas New 36.5 Tetris Ultimate New 70.47 Tetris Ultimate New 70.47 Amazing Spider-Man CIB+ 64.75 Amazing Spider-Man CIB+ 64.75 Bard's Tale: Remastered and Resnarkled New 50.49 Bit.Trip Limited Edition New 33.5 Count Lucanor [Signature Edition] New 144.47 House in Fata Morgana: Dreams of the Revenants Edition CIB+ 99.5 House in Fata Morgana: Dreams of the Revenants Edition M+B 40.1 King of Fighters '97: Global Match New 64.81 Legend of Heroes: Trails of Cold Steel CIB+ 36.49 Legend of Heroes: Trails of Cold Steel (Lionheart Limited Edition) New 72.39 Legend of Heroes: Trails of Cold Steel II CIB+ 57.82 Longest Five Minutes New 32.5 Lost Child New 56.03 Lost Cube [Limited Edition] New 50.49 Ratchet and Clank Trilogy CIB+ 72.77 Swapper New 51.48 Swindle New 27.51 Walking Dead: Season Two - A Telltale Games Series New 22.61 Thomas Was Alone New 33.5 Tokyo Xanadu New 49.32 Touch My Katamari CIB+ 33.72 Twin Breaker: A Sacred Symbols Adventure [Limited Edition] CIB+ 47.09 Ultimate Marvel Vs. Capcom 3 CIB+ 31.21 Ultimate Marvel Vs. Capcom 3 CIB+ 31.21 Uncharted: Golden Abyss CIB+ 27.23 Uncharted: Golden Abyss CIB+ 27.23 Undertale New 66.38 Unepic [Limited Edition] New 274.98 UnMetal New 163.32 Utawarerumono: Mask of Deception New 72.27 Utawarerumono: Mask of Truth - Launch Edition New 36.5 Utawarerumono: Mask of Truth - Launch Edition New 36.5 VA-11 Hall-A New 79.91 Valkyrie Drive: Bhikkhuni CIB+ 66.81 Vasara Collection New 98.5 Velocity 2X: Critical Mass Edition New 63.05 Volume New 32.25 Windjammers New 35.83 Wipeout 2048 New 31.24 World of Final Fantasy New 33.99 Xeno Crisis [Limited Edition] New 100.5 Xeno Crisis [Limited Edition] New 100.5 Xeno Crisis [Limited Edition] New 100.5 Xenon Valkyrie+ New 68.11 Xeodrifter New 44.2 Yomawari: Midnight Shadows CIB+ 33.71 Yomawari: Night Alone / htol#NiQ: The Firefly Diary CIB+ 40.5 Ys Origin New 56.4 Ys VIII: Lacrimosa of DANA New 72.34 Ys: Memories of Celceta CIB+ 25.99 Yumeutsutsu Re:After [Limited Edition] New 82.97 Yumeutsutsu Re:Master [Limited Edition] New 75.48 Zero Escape: Virtue's Last Reward CIB+ 15.5 Zero Escape: Zero Time Dilemma New 33.17 Zero Escape: Zero Time Dilemma Loose 24.51
3DS
Aliens: Infestation Loose 59.32 Minecraft: New Nintendo 3DS Edition New 34.72 New Nintendo 2DS XL White & Orange Loose 206.5 Senran Kagura 2: Deep Crimson (Double D Edition) New 70.5 Senran Kagura 2: Deep Crimson (Double D Edition) New 70.5 Shantae and the Pirate's Curse [Collector's Edition] New 89.39 Shantae and the Pirate's Curse [Collector's Edition] New 89.39

I'm a 30 year old guy. White, with a body type of 'shops at Casual XL', 5'10, and I have long hair and a beard.
My interests are gaming, long walks (I'm a pretty avid Pokemon Go player), window shopping (resale shops, electronic stores, even Walmart, why not?), music (90s/00s alternative, metal, classic rock, although I dabble in another of other genres too), bass guitar (I'm trash but hey it's a hobby lol), writing, standup comedy (Bill Burr, Dave Chappelle, etc), and of course doomscrolling while appreciating awful memes.
Contrary to advice on the matter, I'm upfront about the fact I've never had a relationship of any kind. If that scares you away, I'm not sure what good hiding it would be anyway. I'm honest and loyal, sometimes to a fault it turns out.
As for what I'm looking for? Ideally someone within a few years of me in age (25 to 35? Not a hard limit, though, if you're close to that feel free to hit me up). I'd like someone who lives pretty close to me, like say within an hour of Hammond, Indiana. If you ARE outside that range though and I sound interesting hit me up though lol.
Whether it's casual or long-term, bottom line I'm lonely and want some intimacy in my life. Someone to send good morning and good night texts to. Someone whose selfies put a smile on my face when I'm not feeling it.
If some of the following sounds like you:

• walking around, checking out stores, and people-watching
• fan of Jon Stewart or John Oliver
• voted for Bernie
• 90s alternative like Pearl Jam
• 80s metal (listening to Motorhead as I type lol)
• standup comedy like George Carlin
• gaming (Lucio/Moria main here)
• shitposting

hit me up, let's see where it goes. I've been exceedingly down and lonely lately so worst case scenario we could be Facebook friends. Best case scenario? Let's see where life takes us.

I woke up early, had a healthy breakfast, hiked six miles, stopped all caffeine intake by 11am, gardened, did chores, went grocery shopping, had a healthy dinner, etc etc etc.
And yet I’m still awake. My brain just won’t stop picking me apart.
Lately I’ve just disliked myself as a whole. Not sure if it’s because I’m getting older and noticing many changes that I have zero control over, or what. I kind of just want to cease existing more often than not.
Until then I’ll try to ignore my shitty thoughts and ringing ears and maybe I’ll get a couple hours of sleep before working at my mildly depressing job tomorrow.

I have a 2016 Kia Sorento. Currently the clock is at 125K miles. Around a month ago, I was driving it in the highway and suddenly car start to overheat (Engine temp gauge went up)And smoke came from the engine. I towed it to a nearby repair shop and they said the head gasket is gone and needs an engine replacement. They quoted $10K for an engine replacement and of course I didn't go with them.
Then I found out that I have received the warranty extension letter from Kia for the head gasket issue. I brought the car to a Kia dealership and they replaced the head gasket under the warranty. Also the dealership mentioned that the car needed a short block. All were covered under warranty.
I brought the car home but now I'm not comfortable driving the car for a long distance because I'm afraid that the engine will overheat again. Now I see lots of horror stories about Sorento engine failures. I still owe $10K for the car loan. Very soon the car will need tire replacements and some break jobs, which will cost me around another $2500 I think.
Anybody had a similar issue and how is your car doing after the repair? Should I stop spending money for this car anymore and sell it for parts or something? Because spending more money on maintaining this car and then the engine fails again down the line and if the warranty doesn't cover it, I will lose everything.
KBB trade in value is around $6K-7K. Anyway I'm under water. Maybe I can disclose the incident and sell it to a dealership for around 3K-4k?What is your advice?

1. A Cross-Sectional Study of Blood Ethylmercury Levels and Cognitive Decline Among Older Adults and the Elderly in the United States
   • "Significantly increased risks for lower animal fluency test (odds ratio (OR) = 13.652, p = 0.0029) and CERAD W-L delayed recall test (OR = 6.401, p = 0.0433) scores were observed among the higher ethyl-Hg exposure group as compared to the lower ethyl-Hg exposure group. This study supports the hypothesis that increased ethyl-Hg exposure is associated with significant cognitive decline in older adult and elderly Americans."
2. Thimerosal-Derived Ethylmercury Is a Mitochondrial Toxin in Human Astrocytes: Possible Role of Fenton Chemistry in the Oxidation and Breakage of mtDNA
   • "Ethylmercury causes a 50% collapse in membrane potential in astrocytes at 1 hour. Accompanying this collapse in membrane potential we observe a significant increase in the levels of various ROS. The internal mitochondrial steady state level of superoxide increases by 70% in treated cells and is matched by an increase in cellular hydrazine reactive carbonyls. Using H2DCF-AM we observe a 200% increase in steady state production of reactive oxidants, which from deconvolution we know to be mitochondrially generated (Figure 2). Mitochondrial DNA, and not nuclear DNA, is far more vulnerable to ethylmercury-induced damage. We observe a 240% increase in the levels of mitochondrial DNA breaks, a 300% increase in 3′OH DNA nicks and 460% increase in the levels of oxidized bases/apurinic or apyrimidinic sites"
   • "At higher concentrations (>7.2 μM Thimerosal) a loss of mitochondrial signal and of DCF is observed."
3. The relationship between mercury and autism: A comprehensive review and discussion
   • "This review found 91 studies that examine the potential relationship between mercury and ASD from 1999 to February 2016. Of these studies, the vast majority (74%) suggest that mercury is a risk factor for ASD, revealing both direct and indirect effects. The preponderance of the evidence indicates that mercury exposure is causal and/or contributory in ASD."
4. Examining the evidence that ethylmercury crosses the blood-brain barrier
   • "22 studies from 1971 to 2019 show that exposure to ethylmercury-containing compounds (intravenously, intraperitoneally, topically, subcutaneously, intramuscularly, or intranasally administered) results in accumulation of mercury in the brain. In total, these studies indicate that ethylmercury-containing compounds and Thimerosal readily cross the BBB, convert, for the most part, to highly toxic inorganic mercury-containing compounds, which significantly and persistently bind to tissues in the brain, even in the absence of concurrent detectable blood mercury levels."
5. Comparison of blood and brain mercury levels in infant monkeys exposed to methylmercury or vaccines containing thimerosal
   • "These studies indicate that ethylmercury-containing compounds and Thimerosal readily cross the BBB, convert, for the most part, to highly toxic inorganic mercury-containing compounds, which significantly and persistently bind to tissues in the brain, even in the absence of concurrent detectable blood mercury levels."
   • "The results indicate that MeHg is not a suitable reference for risk assessment from exposure to thimerosal-derived Hg. Knowledge of the toxicokinetics and developmental toxicity of thimerosal is needed to afford a meaningful assessment of the developmental effects of thimerosal-containing vaccines."
   • "The average concentration of inorganic Hg did not change across the 28 days of washout and was approximately 16 ng/mL (Figure 7). This level of inorganic Hg represented 21–86% of the total Hg in the brain (mean ± SE, 70 ± 4%), depending on the sacrifice time. These values are considerably higher than the inorganic fraction observed in the brain of MeHg monkeys (6–10%)."
   • "Absolute inorganic Hg concentrations in the brains of the thimerosal-exposed monkeys were approximately twice that of the MeHg monkeys."
6. Exposure to Inorganic Mercury Causes Oxidative Stress, Cell Death, and Functional Deficits in the Motor Cortex
   • "It was observed that chronic exposure to inorganic mercury caused a decrease in balance and fine motor coordination, formation of mercury deposits and oxidative stress verified by the increase of lipoperoxidation and nitrite concentration and a decrease of the total antioxidant capacity. In addition, we found that this model of exposure to inorganic mercury caused cell death by cytotoxicity and induction of apoptosis with a decreased number of neurons and astrocytes in the motor cortex. Our results provide evidence that exposure to inorganic mercury in low doses, even in spite of its poor ability to cross biological barriers, is still capable of inducing motor deficits, cell death by cytotoxicity and apoptosis, and oxidative stress in the motor cortex of adult rats."
7. The retention time of inorganic mercury in the brain--a systematic review of the evidence
   • "Estimates from modelling studies appear sensitive to model assumptions, however predications based on a long half-life (27.4 years) are consistent with autopsy findings. In summary, shorter estimates of half-life are not supported by evidence from animal studies, human case studies, or modelling studies based on appropriate assumptions. Evidence from such studies point to a half-life of inorganic mercury in human brains of several years to several decades. This finding carries important implications for pharmcokinetic modelling of mercury and potentially for the regulatory toxicology of mercury."
8. Astrocytes in the central nervous system and their functions in health and disease: A review
   • "Because astrocytes contain metal-binding proteins such as metallothionein, they are also involved in the uptake and sequestration of some heavy metals."
9. Proximal tubular transport of Metallothionein-Mercury complexes and protection against nephrotoxicity
   • "MT has a very high affinity for Hg; thus, mercuric ions that are not already bound to MT may bind to MT within the cytoplasm to form large Hg-MT complexes that may be retained in the cell. This will be particularly true in segments of proximal tubules that have higher levels of MT, i.e., cortical proximal tubules. MT is capable of binding 6–11 molecules of Hg (He et al., 2021); thus, it is logical that cells and tissues with higher levels of MT will accumulate more Hg."
10. CHD's Compilation Of Peer-Reviewed, Published Research Showing Adverse Effects of Mercury

just wanted to share my experience and get some advice or suggestions, open to any especially if someone has also experienced the same thing. Anxiety and stress is genetic throughout my family but just up til about recently I have experienced my first severe panic attack. About a week ago I was having fun feeling relaxed and decided to take a hit of a weed pen that my friend had gotten from a vape store. I usually never smoke weed nor like it because it has always given me an experience of panic and paranoia that i did not enjoy. I then decided to take a few hits and nothing happened and i did not feel it or any effects off of it so i took one more hit of it and after about 20-30 mins i had gotten up out of bed and this big sorta rush feeling came right over me and i instantly freaked out and could feel my heart beating out of my chest. i had to lay down with my face in a blanket just to feel somewhat okay. eventually it had whore off... next day i wake up completely fine then after a few hours i feel that terrible feeling again come up over me and it sorta felt like i was high again so i started freaking out and my heart began to race. I took some benadryl seemed to subside the horrible feelings. next day I woke up with symptoms of depersonalization/ derealization. this is what i would say i usually experience while "high" but this was actually the worst I have ever felt. I had to run outside and sit down, i started bawling and my heart felt like it was beating uncontrollably. I looked around and it felt like I was all alone stuck in a dream like I wasn't even real. Since then it has been a couple of days with my symptoms decreasing slowly. every now and then i feel scared and have the fear of the feeling coming back and my heart racing. I do wake up sometimes in the middle of the night with my heart racing with difficulty of breathing. I have mostly been taking benadryl and vitamin D to help. I am trying to stay away from medications. but What seems to be really worrying me is my lack of concentration and control. I always feel drowsy and can't seem to concentrate and have a hard time with remembering things. I think the cause of the anxiety and fear was the cannabis pen. i am just looking for ways to relax my mind, and i am always stuck on the thought if im forever going to feel like this. before this incident i have never experienced things like this before, im not sure if i am only having anxiety because of my experience with the weed or it had actually opened me up to anxiety if that makes sense. only worry now seems to be getting my concentration back and feeling like i am a real person again and enjoying things like how i used to, has anyone else who has smoked or has anxiety experienced this? im wondering if the depersonalization is just from the weed or the anxiety itself and if it will be long term or subside. slowly tho the days have been getting better with little to none mini panic attacks

Personally I have ideas for both if they decided to do a reboot I'd have the first 2 seasons combined into 1 as Season 1 was just finding its footing and its only in season 2 we start seeing the starting if a linear plotline like with the key the caves etc...
So I'd have season 1 end where season 2 ends combine a few essential plotlines into episodes and whatnot have the twister situation/ending for season 1 be the mid-season finale.
I'd also introduce Lois a lot earlier I'd have her be introduced maybe not episode 1 let them build up the essential characters like Clark, Jonathan, Martha, Chloe, Pete, Lex and Lionel and anyone else.
Then start an episode set in Metropolis woth Lois being the rebellious teenage daughter doing a petty crime like Graffiti or Shop lifting then running from the cops only to get caught and her father is called in and as punishment sends her to live with her Cousin this episode could be episode 5 or maybe even 6 or if you really pushed it maybe episode 14 after the resolution of the mid-season finale.
We could have episodes of Lois resisting falling into the comfort of the Small Town vibe but eventually after hanging out with Clark, Chloe, and Pete at the torch she gets roped into writing for the Torch and starts her on her journey from rebellious daughter to Ace Reporter.
She amd Clark are Chloe's feet on the ground, Pete acts as her in with the football players on something amd she acts as the info gatherer and hacker.
I think it would also set up Chloe's "Death" really well in season 4 so Lois can have been investigating since her supposed death and despite the general getting in her way she keeps digging and suddenly Clark shows up again and strange things start happening again and together after he regains his memory he helps her.
I would also have Lana and Clark get together a lot sooner or if not I'd wrap up their relationship sooner like have her leave that video like she does in the original series or actually kill her off eother one so that Clark and Lois can build their relationship it almost felt like thr Clark and Lana show by how long they dragged their relationship on for.
One other addition to this hyperthetical reboot I'd do is have Clark wear his Superman Suit a lot sooner and get him the ability to fly I probably would've had that ability after his rebirth like in the original series when he goes searching for the stones in Season 4 Episode 1 as Kal-El even after he regains his true self I'd have Clark gain the ability to fly.
That's all I can think that I'd change of the reboot maybe have more people find out his secret sooner as the amount of times he tip toes around goes to tell people butbthen changes his mind was really annoying so maybe tell Pete in Season 1 instead of Season 2.
Have Clark tell Chloe and Lois instead of then figuring it out. I'd also have while he hides the truth about his abilities from Lex I'd have that he does give certain truths like the fact he can read the symbols and whatnot he could even come up with lies like how he spent the time between season 3 and 4 studying the writinfs and discovered a pattern and now he can read the symbols.
Or something like that but now for my idea if they ever revived the series ckntinueing where they left off.
Depending ifnthey decided to do another season or make it a movie depends first off I'd have them make the comics canon for those who don't know they did a season 11 comic series a lot of shows did this back in the day as a way to keep the series going without the budget or slot for another season Charmed is another who did this.
But in the Season 11 Comics they also brought in some of the more iconic characters like Batman so ifnit was a sequel season I'd have them turn the comics into episodes maybe expanding them a bit to make them full episodes but I'd have the main antagonist be Darkside and have the final episodes be like a Smallville Version of the movie Justice League War.
I'd also have the actual character appear not be like a weird smoke cloud and have him looking for the Anti-Life Equation like he does in most versions if the character.
If it was a sequel movie I'd probably do the same thing only skim past unimportant plotpoints to build the new Justice League team with Oliver obviously but then bring Barry Allen and we learn that when Bart ran away from home he didn't realise he travelled back in time.
But yeah these are just some of my ideas how would you do things if you were given the power to revive Smallville and hownwould you go about it Reboot or Sequel?

Little backstory; I’m 16 and I lived in group home for 3 months and one of my favorite staff members would give me his duplicates every Sunday when he came. I would organize his cards for hours on the weekend and that became our ritual…we would have outings (basically not in the house) every day and the days he would be scheduled with me we’d go around looking for card shops and never found them in stock. I recently went to Best Buy to buy an MP3 (I’m getting transferred to a new group home) and I found the Kids at Play Box…was looking through all of them and found this guy :) I was stunned, I yelled at the top of my moms and scared my mom (we were in the car lmao) I’m going to my new group home in a week…but this made my day. This brightened my whole week actually. That staff member and I would geek about garbage pail kids and MAD magazines and I would sketch all the staff members as GPK for fun. I made a Halloween painting that they still have in the home. I miss that staff member dearly, I’m thinking about writing a letter before I go and showing this. Thanks for listening to my story tho :p guess I just wanted to say how monumental this was for me. I still remember the cardboard box he brought that had stacks of thousands of cards and he had Nasty Nick, he gave me the reproduction (my name is nic) and I even redrew me as him.
TLDR; me found cool card

Hi, I smoked weed for the second time on April 23rd. First time I was completely fine. I had taken a hit and then waited around 20 minutes. I didn’t feeling anything so took another. I was completely fine and went about my day. Second time I smoked I took two very large hits off of a 97% cart in the same minute. I was told I shouldn’t but did anyway as I’d heard it’s good to take a few hits and then wait. Boy, was I mistaken. Around 5 minutes later I got really tingly all over my body and suddenly really confused. Confused about where I was and what was going on. I thought I had fallen asleep and was dreaming is how it felt. I realized I was probably having really bad derealization. At the start, I held my head in my hands and incoherently freaked and panicked. I had no perception of time and my voice felt far away from me, as if I was not the one talking. The guy I was with calmed me down as well as he could as he was experienced and knew what was going on (luckily). At times I would scream “I am dying”. and overthought about every possible thing that could be happening to me. I thought I was having a stroke one minute then a heart attack the next. I also fainted and few times and threw up when I got home. Went to sleep and was fine the next morning. Point being I had a terrible reaction to it. The smarty pants that I am I tried it again a week later thinking I had just greened out and that I could have a better experience with something less potent. Took two hits, NOPE same exact out of body experience occurred, not as bad but still occurred. I had the same tingly feeling right before I fell into complete derealization. Went to sleep and everything was fine. Today, May 13 is where I was really freaked. I got the same tingly feeling all over and fell into derealization and freaked. Exactly how I felt on weed. But without smoking any weed…. I had a better perception of time but still felt the same nonetheless. I couldn’t distinct what was real from what was not for around an hour and a half. The main freak out part has passed but I’m still pretty out of it. I feel like a zombie. I am terrified. Why did I feel like I was on weed two weeks after I smoked weed??? I have been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder just a heads up. Please help me I’m genuinely so scared. Shouldn’t it all be out of my system by now? Does anyone know what this might be and what will help? Of course I am never smoking weed again.

Hi everyone!
I am 25F, Caucasian, 127 lbs, 5’2”, non-smoking. I am currently on levothyroxine for suspected subclinical hypothyroidism. Previous blood tests did reveal that I have high lipoprotein a.
I recently contracted a bug and started having symptoms on May 9, 2024. It consisted of a fever for the first few days, extreme fatigue, sore throat and cough. Jump to today, May 13, 2024, I still have the fatigue, and wet cough. I had to return to work today, and I actually felt ok this morning, so I wore a mask and I was good for about 2 hours, then I began to have what my doctor has described in the past as a Vasovagal reaction (without losing consciousness, as I know it’s coming and can sit down ASAP). The past reaction was completely unrelated and random. I had 3 “reactions” in the span of 5-10 minutes today, and ultimately left work. I have never had this when healing from sickness prior. I have been taking cold meds and muscle and joint pills to help aid my symptoms since the 9th.
I am likely going to take tomorrow off as well, however, I’m not sure what to do so this does not happen again. My job requires you to be on your feet. My doctor is hard to get into on such short notice! Any help is appreciated!