Hi everyone, I'm josh and I'm 27 and from the UK 🇬🇧.
I have used reddit a number of years ago and have no idea what my log in is so am having to make a new one 🙃
I'm just looking for some cool people to talk with on a daily basis to pass the time.
I welcome anyone to chat, even if you believe the earth is flat I promise to only judge you silently 😂
A few interests would be anime, football, tattoos as I have a few and I'm always down to see pics of your pets :) I have 2 dogs myself.
Guys/girls/ they/them, whatever you identify as I don't mind, as long as you can hold a conversation then we should chat:)

Here is the recap of the 14 monetized posts from Kylea and Joseph "Joe" Gomez of Kylea G Weight loss Journey on 05/13/24.
Disclaimer: I am not a physician, influencer, or paid content creator. I am not affiliated with WW. I am semi-retired from healthcare with multiple college degrees. These opinions are my own based on social media content. I wish no harm to Kylea or Joe Gomez.
☎️ If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, please call or text 988 for assistance.
The tagline of Kylea G Weight loss Journey is, "I changed my life with prayer and a playlist of songs. No surgery, no meds. Just Jesus."
DAILY STATS 05/13/24:
0/14 posts discussed prayer
2/14 contained vague references to music
0/14 discussed exercise
0/14 shared a recipe
4/14 were about something Kylea ate or drank
1/14 contained a side by side photo comparison
2/14 were about her current/future pet (one of these was from "Joe" about Amazon pet items)
1/14 "Joe" posted about getting Whataburger
2/14 were about donut holes & a clapback
2/14 were a trip update
📢 For our friends at Meta, that means at least 50% of Kylea's monetized content had nothing to do with weight loss, which is the tagline and purpose of her page.
⚠️ Disordered Eating- Daily Food Consumption (Data compiled from monetized content):
5 WW Points: Barebell Cookies & Cream Protein Bar
0 WW Points: Alani Nu Energy Drink (🚨 These contain 200mg of caffeine)
9 WW Points: TWO In-N-Out "Protein style" hamburgers wrapped in lettuce.
0 WW Points: Bahama Buck's Sugar-free Birthday Cake & Sugar-free Strawberry cheesecake flavored shaved ice.
📢 For our friends at Meta, that means Kylea consumed 14 out of (up to) 30 daily WW points in maintenance mode= Disordered Eating. This is dangerous messaging for her 138k+ followers on a weight loss journey.
Recipes Shared:
ZERO
🚨 Please speak with a medical professional about any questions or concerns you have about your health.
Comments: Kylea CHOSE to continue posting triggering food content, and clapped back at followers for questioning it.
⚠️ Binge Eating, Compulsive Buying Disorder (CBD), aka shopping addiction, Disordered Eating, Food Addiction, Gaslighting, and Religion will be discussed.
Post 1. Donut Hole Controversy: Kylea posted an empty donut hole bag and claimed her sister ate all of them at 3 WW points each. When called out by a follower, Kylea responded with this, "I don't eat donuts. I support other people eating whatever they'd like to eat. What's unhealthy is commenting on other people's food choices.💖💖💖"
Post 2. Using the Pet Cat for Content: This nontent was her male cat's reaction to being told his puppy sister arrives on Sunday.
Post 3. Protein Bar Slip Up: Kylea recycled an old photo of her holding a Barebell protein bar and tried to act like the photo was taken today. 👀
Post 4. Trip Update: Kylea is shopping for puppy bandanas online because Birdie "only" has 6, while her sister drives. She is listening to 🎶 in the car. 💤 This is nontent.
Post 5. "Unhealthy" Food Clapback: Narcissistic, defiant Kylea had to get the last word in.
"I had someone comment that I post a lot of "unhealthy" food for a weight loss page. The point of my page is to show others that all foods are healthy in moderation. What is not healthy, is commenting on other people's food choices. Mind your own plate. 💖 I personally eat very healthy myself but I support all of the people around me in whatever food choices they want to make for their own lives. I will never and have never commented on someone else's food choice for their own lives."
⏸️ This is gaslighting. Here we go...

1. Kylea is triggered by words like treat, craving, and indulge but was not at the beginning of her weight loss journey.
   
2. Kylea is afraid to own a microwave because it could jeopardize her recovery with food addiction and give her quick access to convenient foods. (Please ignore the air fryer and cabinets full of snacks.)
   
3. If Kylea does not like what Joe is eating at a restaurant, she has placed the menu between them so she does not have to see it.
   
4. Joe is not allowed to have regular condiments in the fridge.
   
5. Joe is to "support" her by eating foods he does not prefer at home (most of the time).
   
6. Kylea controls what Joe eats when she is away from home.
   
7. Please ignore all comments Kylea makes on the Basham and Lee families' social media accounts about food.
   
8. Kylea does not eat clean.
   
9. She triggers her followers with calorie-dense items on purpose for monetary gain.
   
10. Kylea has disordered eating.
    

If that list isn't enough to question her speech, a follower requested a 24-hour food log and the # of daily WW points Kylea uses. Kylea replied, "after months of bullying over that because of how healthy I do eat, I won't ever do that again. It's for my peace that I no longer do."
📢 To our friends at Meta, why is a "weight loss influencer" allowed to refuse to answer follower questions about WW (her chosen tool) and refuse to provide an example of what she eats in a day? This is the job YOU pay her to do.
Post 6. Alani Nu: Avoid this beverage (200mg caffeine) if you are unsure about your recommended caffeine intake.
Post 7. Trip Update: Her sister drove 6 hours. They have to be at the airport tomorrow at 4 am.
Post 8. Fort Worth Stockyards: This photo editing fail made Kylea appear 8 feet tall with a shrunken head and long extremities. Upon follower questions, she blamed her sister for how she held the phone. 🤔
Post 9. IN-N-Out Burger: Kylea's sister ate a cheeseburger & fries, and Kylea had 2 "protein style" hamburgers she claimed were called "protein burgers." Umm, nope.
Post 10. Shaved Ice: Kylea's sister got the baby size shaved ice, and Kylea got a significantly larger-sized cup.
⏸️ I smirked as Kylea claimed the protein bar was "yummy," the In-N-Out was "really good," and the sugar-free shaved ice, "It is SO good!!," but the giant iced cookie cake slice yesterday was "fine." She loves to gaslight and act holier-than-thou. 😇
Post 11. Whataburger: "Joe" posted his bag of Whataburger after waiting 1.5 hours in the drive-thru on opening day.
⏸️ How are the donut holes, energy drink, cheeseburger and fries, and regular shaved ice Kylea's sister consumed, and Whataburger her husband consumed healthy weight loss content? Why is Meta paying her for this nonsense?
Post 12. Amazon Purchases: "Joe" posted a picture of more puppy items and said, "Can you tell my wife is excited about her new role as dog mom 😂 😂" This is nontent.
Post 13. May 2021 vs Today: Kylea is "forever proud of the girl who changed her entire life -208 lbs."
⏸️ Kylea, you traded addictions. That is not something to be proud of. You are terrified of the scale and heavily modify your photos. That is not something to be proud of, either. You can spend all the money and travel the world but you are not happy. Quite the opposite. Seek medical care. ☮️
Post 14. Final Update: Kylea feels "uplifted" from window shopping at the Stockyards and local Target with her sister, listening to country music.
Takeout Purchases: Donut Holes= $3.50 est; In-N-Out Burger: Cheeseburger & Fries with 2 "Protein-style" Hamburgers (online prices)= $11.75 est; Bahama Buck's Baby & Regular Sized Shaved Ice= $9.18 + tip; Whataburger (unknown food)= $8 est;
Shopping/Travel Expenses: Barebell Protein Bar= $2.45 est; Alani Nu Freezeberry Energy= $2.48 est; Alani Nu Juicy Peach Energy= $2.48 est; Gas Joplin, MO to Fort Worth, TX: (373mi/33mpg) x $3.85 est= $43.52 est; Gas Fort Worth, TX to Dallas, TX: (32mi/33mpg) x $3.85 est= $3.73 est; Hotel (prices by airport used)= $75 est + fees; Bocce's Coconut Macaroon Crunchy Biscuits 5oz bag Qty 2= $12.98 est; Bocce's Sauvignon Bark Soft & Chewy 6oz bag Qty 2= $13.58 est; Bocce's Burger & Fries All-Natural Dog Treats Qty 2= $9.08 est; PetStages Grow-with-Me Ring Dog Chew Toy= $5.24 est; Pet Botanics Training Rewards Soft & Chewy Bacon Flavor 20oz bag Qty 2= $27.98 est; Undercoat Rake Grooming Tool= $10.25 est; Paw Print Cube Fabric Storage Bin= $12.99 est; Baghler Airline Approved Dog Travel Bag Light Pink- A Backpack with Silicone Bowls & Food Baskets= $34.99 est; Fabric Strawberry Harness & Leash= $17.99 est; Black Nylon Training Leash= $8.95 est;
All info from Reddit. ✌️

As a pet parent, choosing the right diet for your dog is one of the most critical decisions you'll make. With the growing Dehydrated Dog Food Market and the various options available, it's essential to understand the benefits and drawbacks of each type of dog food: dehydrated, raw, and traditional kibble. This guide aims to help you make an informed decision that best suits your furry friend's needs.

Understanding the Dehydrated Dog Food Market

The Dehydrated Dog Food Market has seen significant growth in recent years, driven by pet owners seeking healthier and more natural alternatives to traditional kibble. Dehydrated dog food involves removing moisture from fresh ingredients, resulting in a lightweight and nutrient-dense product that retains much of the original nutritional value. This option is convenient, with a longer shelf life than raw food and without the preservatives often found in kibble.

Benefits of Dehydrated Dog Food

1. Nutrient Retention: Dehydration retains most of the original nutrients found in fresh ingredients, making it a healthier option.
2. Convenience: Lightweight and easy to store, Dehydrated Dog Food Market is perfect for busy pet owners and those who travel with their pets.
3. No Preservatives: Typically free from artificial preservatives, colors, and flavors, making it a cleaner choice for your dog’s diet.

Drawbacks of Dehydrated Dog Food

1. Preparation Time: Requires rehydration with water before feeding, which can be slightly less convenient than kibble.
2. Cost: Generally more expensive than traditional kibble, though often more affordable than raw diets.

The Raw Dog Food Trend

Feeding dogs a raw diet has become increasingly popular, driven by the belief that it more closely mimics the diet of their wild ancestors. A raw diet typically includes uncooked meat, bones, fruits, and vegetables.

Benefits of Raw Dog Food

1. High Nutritional Value: Raw food diets can provide high levels of nutrients, enzymes, and vitamins that are often lost in cooking and processing.
2. Improved Digestion: Many dogs experience better digestion and less stool production on a raw diet.
3. Shinier Coat and Healthier Skin: Raw diets can lead to noticeable improvements in coat quality and skin health.

Drawbacks of Raw Dog Food

1. Risk of Bacterial Contamination: Handling and storing raw meat can pose a risk of bacterial contamination to both pets and humans.
2. Nutritional Imbalance: Without careful planning, raw diets can be nutritionally unbalanced, leading to deficiencies or excesses.
3. Cost and Storage: Raw food is typically more expensive and requires proper refrigeration or freezing.

Traditional Kibble: The Convenient Classic

Traditional kibble remains the most popular choice among dog owners due to its convenience and affordability. Kibble is dry dog food made from processed ingredients, often including grains, meat by-products, and preservatives.

Benefits of Traditional Kibble

1. Convenience: Easy to store, measure, and serve, making it the go-to option for many busy pet owners.
2. Affordability: Generally the most cost-effective option, especially for large breeds or multi-dog households.
3. Dental Health: The crunchy texture of kibble can help reduce plaque and tartar buildup on dogs’ teeth.

Drawbacks of Traditional Kibble

1. Lower Nutritional Value: The high-heat processing can destroy many nutrients, requiring manufacturers to add synthetic vitamins and minerals.
2. Potential Allergens: Kibble often contains fillers and grains that can cause allergies or sensitivities in some dogs.
3. Preservatives and Additives: Many kibbles contain artificial preservatives, colors, and flavors that some pet owners prefer to avoid.

Making the Right Choice for Your Dog

When choosing the best diet for your canine companion, consider the following factors:

1. Nutritional Needs: Consult with your veterinarian to determine your dog’s specific nutritional requirements based on their age, breed, activity level, and health status.
2. Lifestyle: Choose a diet that fits your lifestyle and schedule. If you’re always on the go, kibble or dehydrated food might be more practical than raw food.
3. Budget: Factor in the cost of the food and any additional expenses, such as supplements for raw diets or higher-quality dehydrated options.

Ultimately, the best food for your dog is one that meets their nutritional needs, fits your lifestyle, and aligns with your values. The Dehydrated Dog Food Market offers a promising alternative to traditional options, but it's essential to weigh all factors before making a decision. By understanding the benefits and drawbacks of dehydrated, raw, and kibble diets, you can make an informed choice that will keep your canine companion happy and healthy.
Dehydrated vs. Raw vs. Traditional Kibble: Making Informed Choices for Your Canine Companion

As a pet parent, choosing the right diet for your dog is one of the most critical decisions you'll make. With the growing Dehydrated Dog Food Market and the various options available, it's essential to understand the benefits and drawbacks of each type of dog food: dehydrated, raw, and traditional kibble. This guide aims to help you make an informed decision that best suits your furry friend's needs.

Understanding the Dehydrated Dog Food Market

The Dehydrated Dog Food Market has seen significant growth in recent years, driven by pet owners seeking healthier and more natural alternatives to traditional kibble. Dehydrated dog food involves removing moisture from fresh ingredients, resulting in a lightweight and nutrient-dense product that retains much of the original nutritional value. This option is convenient, with a longer shelf life than raw food and without the preservatives often found in kibble.

Benefits of Dehydrated Dog Food

1. Nutrient Retention: Dehydration retains most of the original nutrients found in fresh ingredients, making it a healthier option.
2. Convenience: Lightweight and easy to store, Dehydrated Dog Food Market is perfect for busy pet owners and those who travel with their pets.
3. No Preservatives: Typically free from artificial preservatives, colors, and flavors, making it a cleaner choice for your dog’s diet.

Drawbacks of Dehydrated Dog Food

1. Preparation Time: Requires rehydration with water before feeding, which can be slightly less convenient than kibble.
2. Cost: Generally more expensive than traditional kibble, though often more affordable than raw diets.

The Raw Dog Food Trend

Feeding dogs a raw diet has become increasingly popular, driven by the belief that it more closely mimics the diet of their wild ancestors. A raw diet typically includes uncooked meat, bones, fruits, and vegetables.

Benefits of Raw Dog Food

1. High Nutritional Value: Raw food diets can provide high levels of nutrients, enzymes, and vitamins that are often lost in cooking and processing.
2. Improved Digestion: Many dogs experience better digestion and less stool production on a raw diet.
3. Shinier Coat and Healthier Skin: Raw diets can lead to noticeable improvements in coat quality and skin health.

Drawbacks of Raw Dog Food

1. Risk of Bacterial Contamination: Handling and storing raw meat can pose a risk of bacterial contamination to both pets and humans.
2. Nutritional Imbalance: Without careful planning, raw diets can be nutritionally unbalanced, leading to deficiencies or excesses.
3. Cost and Storage: Raw food is typically more expensive and requires proper refrigeration or freezing.

Traditional Kibble: The Convenient Classic

Traditional kibble remains the most popular choice among dog owners due to its convenience and affordability. Kibble is dry dog food made from processed ingredients, often including grains, meat by-products, and preservatives.

Benefits of Traditional Kibble

1. Convenience: Easy to store, measure, and serve, making it the go-to option for many busy pet owners.
2. Affordability: Generally the most cost-effective option, especially for large breeds or multi-dog households.
3. Dental Health: The crunchy texture of kibble can help reduce plaque and tartar buildup on dogs’ teeth.

Drawbacks of Traditional Kibble

1. Lower Nutritional Value: The high-heat processing can destroy many nutrients, requiring manufacturers to add synthetic vitamins and minerals.
2. Potential Allergens: Kibble often contains fillers and grains that can cause allergies or sensitivities in some dogs.
3. Preservatives and Additives: Many kibbles contain artificial preservatives, colors, and flavors that some pet owners prefer to avoid.

Making the Right Choice for Your Dog

When choosing the best diet for your canine companion, consider the following factors:

1. Nutritional Needs: Consult with your veterinarian to determine your dog’s specific nutritional requirements based on their age, breed, activity level, and health status.
2. Lifestyle: Choose a diet that fits your lifestyle and schedule. If you’re always on the go, kibble or dehydrated food might be more practical than raw food.
3. Budget: Factor in the cost of the food and any additional expenses, such as supplements for raw diets or higher-quality dehydrated options.

Ultimately, the best food for your dog is one that meets their nutritional needs, fits your lifestyle, and aligns with your values. The Dehydrated Dog Food Market offers a promising alternative to traditional options, but it's essential to weigh all factors before making a decision. By understanding the benefits and drawbacks of dehydrated, raw, and kibble diets, you can make an informed choice that will keep your canine companion happy and healthy.

Was on Instagram this morning and saw a little cute hammy that was pretty old, checked the comments: fatal mistake. Why are people so okay with killing small mammals? Some people straight up admit to doing it and are proud? There's horrible, gruesome ways in which hamsters may die, oftentimes due to negligence or bad care, but why would it ever be a fun, quirky story to tell? And the ones that died because their owners didn't know better. "Mine died because its friend/ sibling killed it" they aren't supposed to be housed together in most circumstances. "Mine died randomly after spilling water all over itself on a car trip" possible hypothermia or temperature shifts. "Mine just randomly died" There's so many genetic issues with pets from pet stores people don't know about too. Your hamster didn't die randomly because it's stupid and so fragile it's own reflection could end it, but likely because it came from a lineage of hamsters that were bred in mass, with poor conditions or care for genetics or issues associatied. I was ignorant like this as a kid, had 3 betta fish die because of bad pet store advice and it was horrible. It made me sad, made my parents sad, but now information is more available than ever. It's just one click away. (I have had betta fish live over 2 years now too, with proper care) Yet people are so ignorant.. and I have no issues with the ones that get advice and are quick to change their ways, in fact I'm proud of them, but some don't. They abuse their pets and why? This is so much bigger than hamsters too. It's mice, it's birds, it's turtles, it's cats, dogs, and even wild animals. I have had a dog since I was a kid and only now am I learning about dog behavior and how to interpret it. So many dogs seen as being cute or playful are actually stressed out. Their warnings get ignored and then they bite. Then they're a "bad dog", who bit out of nowhere. It stuck with me how little we understand about these creatures. We expect them to understand our "language", without understanding theirs. And don't get me started on giving pets to kids. It's vital that we teach children to respect animals and small animals should have never been seen as kid's pets. My cousin loves to pet my hamster, but he never touches it without me present to hold her. That's cause he's 3 y/o going 4. His hands are too forceful if I don't hold them and I know that if he had picked my hamster up he'd drop her or hurt her. I was no different at his age. If I had a hamster instead of fish when I was 6 they would've definitely died too. Kids aren't ready to be responsible for another living being, and rodents, fish and birds shouldn't ever have to be subjected to the mercy of a child. Where parents see a lesson about responsability, animals are trying to live and survive in an already stressful environment often with people that know nothing about their proper care. They can't speak, and their stress behaviors are often overlooked as fun little quirks and activities (monkey baring and cage biting/ chewing for example) It just makes me sad and hopeless that there are so many people who'd rather be ignorant, or straight up hurt animals for fun. I love hamsters, my current girl is my longest living one and I love her silliness. Honestly, it's very rewarding to have a happy small animal. I think people forget small animals are just as alive as we are. Thanks for reading so far if you have, this is a lot. I'm sorry for huge rant. And I hope it's rule-abiding. If anyone wants to add to it or share a silly hamster picture to make up for all the sad hamsters out there you're welcome to do so! <3

Life, it's so unfair, it's beautiful yet cruel. What is the meaning and purpose of life anyways? We live, we die. Every living, breathing thing.....dies....Just one day up and.... dies. Nobody knows what is after death. Is there really an afterlife or is it just... Nothingness..... If it's nothingness, like before we were born, where we remember nothingness. Then why is there life, of any kind...... What then is the purpose of being a living being of any kind. We're told to have "faith and "believe" but how, when everything .. dies...
I can't wrap my head around it.
My precious NutterButter Petey Pete, I still can't wrap my head around the fact you are no longer physically here. It's like a nightmare I can't wake up from. We had a rough life with good times as well, together for 12.5 years. Where did that time go? Why didn't I have more money to tend to you better. Why did I think February 15th 2024 would never happen. Why did I not run you to the vet more often. Why was I in denial and not believing something more may had been going on with your health. Why did I ever yell at you. Why did I get frustrated with you at times during your last year. Why didn't we build the ramp for you sooner. Why did I not love you more and harder. Why did you have to get cancer. Why did they not discover it sooner. Why did all they want to do back when they found your liver enzyme kept rising and nothing was bringing it down. Why did they only want to just keep rechecking it and doing nothing more while it rose off the chart. Why did they only give you meds for your arthritis and IVDD (gabapentin and Caprofen). Why did I not get a second opinion. Why trust one dogtor. Why did I not do more for you. Why did I not face reality in it all. Why was I such a financially poor pet parent. Why did and why do I just suck as a human. Why did you have to leave me 😭😭😭💔💔💔
NutterButter Petey Pete, I hope you hear me when I talk to you be it in silence or out loud. Pete, I hope you know how deeply I loved you and forever will. Pete, I still feel your presence around me. Pete, who da puppyhead, Pete da puppyhead, who da good boy, Pete a good boy ❤️ remember me always saying that to you? Pete, remember me asking almost daily since you were a baby " What do you think Pete, the whole world's fucked up, yeah, me too buddy." Pete, remember me calling you my baby dog? Pete, remember me calling you an asshole? Calling you a shit and a shithead? Telling you you're a pain in the ass? Damnit how I absolutely loved you!!! Remember I'd sing, "you're my best friend in the whole wide world, you're my best friend in da whole wide world." And singing "I love you, you love me, were a happy family, you and me and me and you, together we'll always be." Pete, remember how you'd hug me with your head and neck around my neck when you were younger. How you'd snuggle in tight against me when we'd sleep. How you'd bark at me at 8 pm at night because you were ready for bed and snuggle, even if we were somewhere else, we'd have to leave and go home because, that's where you wanted to be, at 8 pm. Goofball 😂 I'm smiling, crying and giggling while writing this for you. You, Pete, were my heart and soul pup. You forever will be. You sent me another pup and me for him about five ish weeks after you left this world. He too is a shithead lol. He's a good boy, just like you were. Pete, I thank you for sending him and I to each other. He's helped me grieve the loss of you. He's still helping me get through this all. I was really going down a spiral and I know this is your way of saying you love me, you want me to go on, heal and feel comfort.
Petey, I know you are around me, I feel your presence very often. I feel you the strongest when I'm driving. I feel you riding on the console next to me watching straight ahead while we roll down the road. I remember your antsiness and lord it'd drive me crazy lol. Like you had ADHD or something lol. How you'd drive me insane with that cocker spaniel barking when you'd get excited or wanted attention when you couldn't see me or when I'd walk down to the ducks to feed them while you were on the porch and could see me clearly. Lol. You sure we're a crazy pup, but you were mine and I loved you beyond measure and you could also annoy me beyond measure lol.
Petey, Three months today I had to make that final horrible last call for you. FUCK Cancer!!!!!! Fffffffuuuuuuccccckkkkk 🤬😭🤬
I thought I had more days, weeks and was hoping for at least a couple more years with you. But then January 22nd 2024 came. That's when you and I got the devastating news... You had a splenic mass and metastatic liver disease 💔
WTF!!!?????
Whyyyyyyyyyy!!!!????
Oh Petey, the love of my life, the apple of my eye, my utmost best friend in the world, why did this happen to you 💔😭
I'm so sorry I failed you, I'm so sorry little buddy, I'm so sorry 💔
Please forgive me, Pete, for the times I've yelled at you, got frustrated with you, got annoyed or hurt your feelings in any way 😔
I love you my good boy ❤️ Forever and always 🕊️
Stay near me Pete, I still need you! You can go play, but stay close by me, ok?
I love you to the moon and beyond!!!!
Your mommy....

Introduction
1. Will this be your first dog? If not, what experience do you have owning/training dogs?
· This will be my first dog but not my partners. He grew up with dogs and has had them for most of his life.
2. Do you have a preference for rescuing a dog vs. going through a reputable breeder?
· Reputable breeder would be my preference.
3. Describe your ideal dog.
· Medium or large sized, willing to go for hiking and backpacking trips with me. Ideally a dog that we can take to the crag when we’re climbing. One that is friendly with cats.
4. What breeds or types of dogs are you interested in and why?
· Right now we are considering a labrador retriever, an aussie shepherd, or a toller, mostly because I have really nice experiences with these breeds. I am open to other breeds as well. My partner has had huskies, malamutes, flat coated retrievers and pointers
5. What sorts of things would you like to train your dog to do?
· Obedience and catch for fun.
6. Do you want to compete with your dog in a sport (e.g. agility, obedience, rally) or use your dog for a form of work (e.g. hunting, herding, livestock guarding)? If so, how much experience do you have with this work/sport?
· No I just want a new family member.
Care Commitments
7) How long do you want to devote to training, playing with, or otherwise interacting with your dog each day?
· A few hours everyday.
8. How long can you exercise your dog each day, on average? What sorts of exercise are you planning to give your dog regularly and does that include using a dog park?
· On weekdays, up to two hours. On weekends, three to five hours, possibly more depending on what activities we are doing. I work from the office 2 days a week but otherwise I am home. Our backyard is connected to a huge forest with lots of hiking trails and lakes, and I live in a very quiet and dog friendly neighbourhood. There will be lots of hikes and swimming, if that’s what they’d like to do.
9. How much regular brushing are you willing to do? Are you open to trimming hair, cleaning ears, or doing other grooming at home? If not, would you be willing to pay a professional to do it regularly?
· I groom my long haired cats regularly and will be open to doing the same for my dog. Anything that is too complex will be done by a professional.
Personal Preferences
10) What size dog are you looking for?
· Medium or large.
11. How much shedding, barking, and slobber can you handle?
· Minimal barking, and slobber. Shedding is fine, I’m used to it.
12. How important is being able to let your dog off-leash in an unfenced area?
· It would be great if they can go off leash while hiking in the forest, but its not a big issue if they need to remain leashed.
Dog Personality and Behavior
13) Do you want a snuggly dog or one that prefers some personal space?
· I love snuggles but I also get lots of snuggles from my cats so it doesn’t really matter either way.
14. Would you prefer a dog that wants to do its own thing or one that’s more eager-to-please?
· Would like a dog that’s eager to please.
15. How would you prefer your dog to respond to someone knocking on the door or entering your yard? How would you prefer your dog to greet strangers or visitors?
· No aggressiveness
16. Are you willing to manage a dog that is aggressive to other dogs?
· Ideally not.
17. Are there any other behaviors you can’t deal with or want to avoid?
· Excessive barking ideally would be avoided,.
Lifestyle
18) How often and how long will the dog be left alone?
· For 2 days I will work from the office, where they will be left alone for 4 hour stretches. Otherwise they will not be left alone.
19. What are the dog-related preferences of other people in the house and what will be their involvement in caring for the dog?
· Feed or walk him if I’m outside or studying inside.
20. Do you have other pets or are you planning on having other pets? What breed or type of animal are they?
· Yes I have 3 norwegian forest cats.
21. Will the dog be interacting with children regularly?
· No
22. Do you rent or plan to rent in the future? If applicable, what breed or weight restrictions are on your current lease?
· We own our house.
23. What city or country do you live in and are you aware of any laws banning certain breeds?
· Sweden. No laws that I know of but I do know that breeds like pitbulls can be frowned upon.
24. What is the average temperature of a typical summer and winter day where you live?
· Summer is around 20 degrees celsius. Winters there is snow and can be anywhere between negative 15 degrees celsius to 5 degrees celsius
Additional Information and Questions
25) Please provide any additional information you feel may be relevant.
I would like to get a puppy so they can learn to be around cats from a young age.

First Prev [Next]

Chapter 15: For What You’ve Tamed
“We’ve come a long way, Vikri. Let’s finish your story,” Rayner said as he sat down in the same chair, crossing his legs in the same way.; small consistencies that made the task of talking about my past seem a little more routine. “I understand you lost someone important to you that day.”
I shifted slightly where I sat. “Yeah,” I answered coarsely. I grabbed at the poncho hanging over my shoulders. I remembered what it felt like in my dreams. Radiant warmth always seemed to emanate from it. Not necessarily the poncho itself, but Tenga’s memory. I realized that as long as I had those, then he was still here in a way. I’d much rather have him here than his memory though.
Rayner nodded. “I know what that’s like,” he said in a near whisper.
I shook my head. “It’s not just that I lost him. I…I failed,” I rasped. “I could’ve saved him. Maybe if I’d gone back I could’ve gotten the equipment before the fire did. I was too afraid.”
Rayner nodded slowly. “And now you feel responsible.”
I remained silent as I clutched my tail on the couch beside me. Rayner already knew the answer. He pursed his lips. “Yeah…I know exactly how that feels.”
I looked up at him. For the first time, his eyes weren’t on me, but on the adjacent wall as he seemed to ponder something. “You think about all the things you could have done differently. Things that are so obvious in hindsight,” he sighed and adjusted his glasses. “If only it were that clear in the moment.” He looked up at me, clasping his hands together. “So walk me through what happened.”
I could still vividly remember the moment Tenga got shot. Everything happened in the blink of an eye. So quickly in fact, that it even took Tenga a moment to realize there was a hole in his torso. Minutes of continuous tension shattered with a hail of gunfire lasting less than a second. The echoes continued to howl through the mountains long after the bodies met the snow. My friend was fatally wounded, the snow around him dyed bright red with his blood. And I had to leave him.
The entire time I was in the belly of the federation destroyer with danger lurking around every corner, all I wanted to do was to get this done as quickly as possible and get back to him. I was enraged that they’d done this to him and to billions just like him.
“Tenga was all I thought about the entire time,” I croaked. “And I…I was willing to kill everyone onboard to get back to him, even if there was no way I ever could. I… did things I could never have imagined myself doing even just days ago. I tore a chunk out of my leg just to be able to get to the Krakotl pinning me down with a crowbar.” I inhaled deeply, staring down at my reflection in the water, recalling my bloodshot eyes in the reflection of the ship's monitor. The grimly colorful bloodstains in my fur from several different species.
Rayner nodded. “It was a desperate situation. Many don’t see themselves doing things like that until they’re put in a situation where it's necessary. A situation where it's do or die. No one can fault you for that, especially not with all that depended on you.”
“I guess I just…It’s just worrying knowing that there’s a part of me capable of that.”
The doctor tapped his pen on his notepad as he seemed to think for a moment. “Do you worry that you may have violent outbursts?”
I scoffed. “Well, the events of a few days ago provided good grounds for worry.”
Rayner nodded. “Aggression is common for PTSD victims. It can be difficult to manage intense emotions when your mind is already dealing with so much.
I shook my head. “That’s not the person I want to be.”
Rayner nodded. “I know Vikri. That’s why it's so crucial for you to talk about this stuff. The less all of this weighs on you, the better you’ll be able to control those emotions when they arise.”
He finished writing on his notepad before taking off his glasses and leaning forward slightly. “So what happened to Tenga?”
The question made my heart sink. My mind went quiet. The second hand of time sounded like the footsteps of a giant marching toward…something. My body seemed to go cold and numb. “He died…” I croaked, staring down at the table. That was the first time I’d admitted that to myself verbally in such a direct way. “And I tried so hard,” I choked, tears now streaming down my face. “I did everything in my power to save him. I even put Querek’s life in danger.”
I felt the heat. I could feel cold water dripping from my paws as the burning ship melted the frost accumulating in my fur. I remembered the terrifying hopelessness that gripped me as I gripped Querek and pushed him into the snow. He tried to sacrifice himself for Tenga. What if I had let him? Would it have even worked? Could Tenga accept that?
I recalled the story to Rayner, battling to keep my composure. “I…I watched him die,” I choked. “And I was furious. Reese had to pull me off of him. I wanted to do…something, anything, but…he told them not to bring him back. I think he…” I winced at the thought of him considering this. “I think he’d rather have died sacrificing himself over…going rabid.”
Silence perforated the room for what felt like several long minutes. Rayner sat with his legs crossed, his hand propped up against his mouth. He seemed to become lost in thought for a moment before speaking. “I know how that guilt feels,” he admitted quietly.
I looked at him, somewhat surprised. “You do?”
Rayner nodded, rubbing his hands together. “My son,” he said plainly, taking a long pause before he continued. “He and Jesse were very close as kids. Practically brothers.” He tapped on his clipboard with his pen. “I was…not so available in those days. I was a very different man than I am now. I was still in school. I was always busy, always stressed. I hadn't even considered becoming a therapist. I was deadset on becoming a neurosurgeon.” He scoffed at himself, his head gently shaking back and forth as his gaze grew distant. His delivery lacked that matter-of-fact candor I was so used to by now. He was much quieter; less animated. His eye contact was sporadic and he never stopped fidgeting with his pen. Everything about him seemed suddenly mired in an emotion that was difficult to read. That was when I saw everything we'd done over the past few days for what it really was. Rayner wasn't invincible. He never claimed to be. He was hurt; I could hear it in his voice. He wasn't a person reaching down into the mud and yanking me out by the nape of the neck. He was man covered in mud himself. He wasn't an untouchable hero. Merely a guide.
He continued as that realization struck me. “I loved him as much as a father could. But I was so busy that…well I wasn't there as much as I'd like to have been. That put a big strain on our relationship.” He removed his glasses and wiped the lenses a few times before he continued. “One night we got into an argument. He’d just gotten his license. He had an old beat-up car I'd bought him for his birthday,” he chuffed. “A teen’s first car is always…eccentric. Thought it was a great deal at the time.” He sighed and nodded slightly before continuing. “He left the house enraged, speeding down the road. After a few miles, he lost control, swerved off the road, and hit a tree head-on. The airbag never deployed. The car crumpled like a soda can.”
I stared at him, speechless as he concluded in a near-whisper. “He was declared dead at the scene.”
The room felt hollow for a few long seconds. I searched for a reply but couldn't fathom the right words to say. Fortunately, Rayner didn't stay silent for long. “Like you, I blamed myself for a long…long time.” He sighed. “And it nearly destroyed me.”
I stared at the floor, fidgeting with my tail. “How did you…overcome that?”
“Well it didn't happen overnight,” he replied, flashing a brief smile. “It takes time but, at some point, you have to carry on living. You have to continue loving.” His eyes creased slightly as he looked down at his own hands. “You have to keep loving,” he repeated in a low whisper.
Loud silence claimed the room again as his words sank in. He was right. It was either accept what happened or live like this forever. Looking at it that pragmatically, the choice seemed easy. Emotions are never so logical though. It wasn’t as if he relieved himself of that burden either, it was obvious he still carried it. It just…didn’t weigh as much now. Not because it got lighter, but because he got stronger. I eased into speaking again. “I…I'm sorry. About your son.”
Rayner nodded. “I'm sorry about your friend.”
We both stewed in silence for a minute before Rayner spoke up. “We’ll send you home today.”
“You…really think I’m ready?”
Rayner nodded slowly. “I think so. The medication seems to be working, you haven’t had any breakdowns since you’ve been here. You’ve gotten much better at discussing these things. I think you’re equipped to face this now.”
“...I’m afraid,” I croaked.
“Of what?” Rayner asked, leaning forward
“Of…seeing Lucky again. I'm doubting whether I even should. I was never prepared to be her master. I’m just a danger to her.”
“Vikri,” Rayner exhaled and leaned forward. “You made a mistake. We all do. But you have a responsibility to her. You should at least see her and face that mistake, or you’ll never have closure. What you decide after that is your choice, but I don’t think it’ll be as bad as you think.”
“I hope so,” I sighed.
Rayner clicked his pen and set his notepad aside. “We’ve made you some medication to take home, same stuff you've been taking. The plan is to keep lowering the dosage until you’re sleeping without it. We’ve made you some sheets with all the daily doses on them and when to take each one. It’s enough to last you two weeks, then once they’re out, you’ll come back here for another session, then if you need it, we’ll get you more and keep weaning you off them.”
He leaned forward, emphasizing his next words. “And I cannot recommend enough that you go to Jesse’s support group in between our meetings. Those will help you tremendously, I’m sure of it.”
I nodded. “I have his number. I’ll…I’ll give it a shot.”
“You won't regret it,” Rayner assured me. “Jesse was in the same chair as you not too long ago for similar reasons. He has knowledge from first-hand experience. I can vouch for him, he’s a great guy.” He inhaled. “Well, is there anything else Vikri? We won’t be seeing each other again for a while, so if there’s anything else, now’s the time to talk about it.”
I thought for a second. We’d covered almost everything. I’d never discussed those days in so much detail. It felt like being submerged in icy water. It was miserable at first, but over time it became easier, even comfortable. I’d relived so much pain over the last three days, but here at the end of the whole story, It felt less like a nightmare, and more like reality. “No, I don’t think so,” I finally replied.
“Then I’ll clear you to go home. Andrea is here, she’ll give you a ride, I’m sure. Here.” He reached over and handed me a small business card. “That has all my contact information on it. I’m usually here in my office until late at night, so feel free to call if you need anything. If the sedative gives you any issues at all, any side effects, make sure to call and let me know. We followed the recipe to a tee, but it’s wise to be cautious.”
A familiar silence flooded the room as Rayner and I seemed to, for the first time, have nothing left to say. Finally, the doctor spoke. “See you in two weeks, Vikri.”
///////////////////////////////
Golden strands of light danced between the digits of my paw as I moved it in front of the brilliant summer sun. An intense beacon of warmth floating in a sky as blue as Earth’s oceans. The rumble of Andy’s car occupied the air as we cruised down the highway. Vivri was sound asleep in the backseat. The gentle white noise and vibration seemed to knock her out cold. I watched the sunrays dance as I waved my paw in front of me, before turning it around. Several spots on my paw still had obvious scars. I even still had burn scars from the electrical systems aboard the crumbling Cardinal.
I curled my paw closed into a fist and rested my head against it, watching the lush, green mountains pass by in the distance. After three days I was set loose into the world once again, hopefully better armed than I was before. Even after all the weight I doffed from my shoulders in Rayner’s office, a crushing mass still rested on my chest. Lucky.
The weight only became heavier as the car slowed, and rounded a corner into the parking lot of a large animal hospital. Andy gently brought the car to a stop in a parking space in front of the entrance. Occasionally people would walk in and out with their pets, many of which were dogs on leashes.
Vivri stirred awake after we stopped. “Oh…We’re here,” she muttered nervously. “There’s…a lot more animals here than I was expecting.”
Andy chuckled. “It’s an animal hospital girl, there’s gonna be all kinds of critters here.”
I turned around to face her. “You don’t have to go in there. You and Andy can wait here.”
Andy scoffed. “You might wanna tell Rayner they screwed up those meds, ‘cause you’re delusional if you think I’m letting you go in there by yourself.”
“Well I don’t want her to be alone out here,” I argued.
“I’ll go in, just…stay close, please?” Vivri interjected.
I looked back at her, ears tilted. She was dead serious. I sighed and shook my head. “This is gonna be a disaster,” I groaned.
Andy opened her door. “I’ll wait with her in the lobby, you go talk to the vets. It’ll be fine.”
I looked back at Vivri one last time as Andy stepped out. “Alright, just stay away from the cats.” I opened my door and began stepping out into the summer air.
“C-cats?”
“Small felines. They're demons with mind control,” I replied just before closing the door.
Vivri scrambled out of the car and followed right on my heels. “Well don’t just leave me!” she squeaked.
I laughed. “I’m kidding. Well, mostly.”
Walking into the building, I realized that Lucky had been in a very similar place as me over the past three days. The lobby felt eerily similar to the one at the medical center. Everything went silent as Vivri and I walked in. Immediately I could feel dozens of eyes on us. Vivri hid close behind me as Andy gestured for me to follow her to the desk.
I doubted any of the humans there meant any harm, but dozens of binocular eyes snapping onto her in an instant had Vivri more unsettled than she already was. It didn’t help that several dogs were either on leashes or in carriers in the lobby, which were no doubt just as curious. I grabbed Viv’s paw. “They don't see many Venlil,” I whispered. “Just ignore them.”
I approached the desk with Vivri still hiding behind me. “E-excuse me?” I stuttered. The woman at the desk looked up, clearly caught off guard by two venlil standing before her. “O-oh! Excuse me, you must be Lucky’s owner, right?”
“Yeah. Vikri.” I could feel Vivri shivering behind me.
“I’ll let Doctor Gavin know you’re here.”
“Thanks,” I muttered before turning to Vivri. “Are you sure about this?” I whispered.
“Of course! It’s just for a few minutes, right?” Her body language gave an entirely different answer. She seemed like she might faint at any moment.
I looked up at Andy. “Keep her close, would you?”
Andy wrapped her arms over Viv’s shoulders. “Of course. I’ll keep little Vivi safe from all the big, bad puppy dogs and mean kitties,” she said in baby speak, twisting her side to side. She giggled. “We’ll be fine.” Her tone suddenly shifted as she locked eyes with me. “Will you?”
I stood there in silence for a moment. This entire time my heart felt unbearably heavy. Standing there, I felt nauseous. So much so that I made it a point to know exactly where the bathroom was when I walked in. The weight on my chest made breathing a laborious task. I heaved in a deep breath. “I don’t know,” I admitted. “I don’t know what’s going to happen in there but…I have to do this. For both of us.”
Andy exhaled and nodded, seemingly just as nervous for me. Right on cue, the door at the back of the room opened with a heavy click. “Vikri?” a male voice called out. An older gentleman in burgundy scrubs surveyed the room. It didn’t take long for him to find me. He nodded toward me as he adjusted his glasses. “Right this way, please.”
“We’ll be right here,” Andy whispered, her hands still resting around Viv’s shoulders, who agreed with a tail flick.
I nodded and walked toward the man, leaving the cozy waiting room behind, and entering a long, sterile hallway. The doctor’s shoes clicked against the tile as he walked just in front of me. The weight bearing down on my chest only got heavier with each step. After a few agonizing seconds, the man finally spoke up as he stopped outside a door. “I’m Doctor Gavin,” he said breathily, extending a hand. “I performed Lucky’s surgery.”
I took his hand with my paw, which he could no doubt tell was trembling by this point. “Vikri,” I choked. “S-so…How is she?”
“She’s good,” Gavin answered in a higher pitch. “She’s recovering remarkably fast. Really lived up to her name.” He opened the door and stepped through into a kennel area as he continued. “The bullet hit one of her ribs and shattered. A couple of fragments pierced her lung, one of them was just inches from her heart. There’re still a few very small ones lodged in her tissue, but we’d be doing more harm than good by trying to remove them. They shouldn’t cause any issues and come out on their own after some time, but we’ll keep track of them with x-rays.”
As he spoke we passed by kennels, some empty, some with dogs that barked or jumped up on the cage as we passed. I scoured each one for Lucky, my dread building with each one we passed. Suddenly, the doctor stopped in front of me. He inhaled deeply. “I should mention…Given the…circumstances of how she got these injuries, me and some staff will stay with you just in case she becomes aggressive. That’s not to say that I think she will,” he added hastily, “she’s been great with everyone here but…you know, just to be safe.”
“I get it,” I breathed. It made sense. If Lucky attacked me, it would be far more deadly than it would be for a human. And I was confident even a human wouldn’t last long against a half-wolf her size. Fittingly, a group of four humans were gathered at the end of the hallway, catchers in hand.
Time seemed to slow as I approached the pen. The staff members all looked over at me with the same anxious expression. I felt like a prisoner walking toward my judgment, and that perhaps it was me that belonged behind these cages. I swallowed and took a long, slow breath as Gavin opened the gate. He walked in ahead of me. “Hey there big girl,” he said in a chipper tone. I heard the familiar thumping of Lucky’s tail against the floor. Gavin chuckled to himself as the remaining four staff calmly and quietly filed into the pen. Once they were all inside, the final human leaned around the corner, looked me in the eyes for a long second, and nodded once.
A new reality awaited around that corner. My sentence was about to be read. It felt so cripplingly helpless; wanting so desperately to finally be reunited with my best friend, yet trembling at the thought of rounding a corner to run face-first into the consequences of my actions. I steeled myself one last time. I nodded back at the catcher and took slow, deliberate steps toward him. I finally rounded the corner, and for the first time since the incident, I saw Lucky.
She lay on a large, fabric bed, with food and water bowls close by. Her right front leg was bound in a cast, tied up close to her body. A large patch of fur had been shaved away around her chest and halfway up her neck. She seemed thinner than I remembered. It reminded me of the scared, hungry pup I’d met so long ago.
Her eyes tracked onto mine instantly, and I felt an ache that defied all imagination. The same gaze that would send almost any other Venlil scrambling down the hallway instead gripped some inner part of me in a cold, numb stasis. I couldn’t move. Part of me wanted to run to her and spill out how sorry I was. Another wanted to curl up on the floor right there and sob, returning to that familiar numbness that seemed akin to the ancient enemy of life itself. The cold. That bitterness that pierced through fur, through flesh, through bones, and any ideal held by the naive child that sat next to Tenga’s corpse that day. It ran through until there was nothing left.
Then, I felt a warmth as if someone had draped a blanket over me. I gripped my poncho around my shoulders, grabbing it tightly. I made a quiet promise to myself there and then. Not a promise to my sister, or my parents, or Andrea. Me. I wouldn’t lie down in the cold. Never again. One more hill.
“Hey Lucky,” I said, my voice coarse and breaking every syllable.
The silence was abruptly broken as Lucky, though seemingly frail, shot to her feet. Everyone in the room shifted, prepared for the worst. I didn’t dare move, but I could feel my heart pounding in my legs, my body preparing to bolt. The staff watched her carefully, their grip slightly tightened around their polls. Lucky made no sounds, only stared at me, her nostrils flaring as she gathered my scent. Her right front leg was useless, immobilized against her body. She shifted her footing to steady herself. Then I saw something that replaced fear with tears. She was shaking like a leaf, never taking her eyes off me. She could care less about the others. She was scared. Of me.
I felt myself fall off a ledge in a sensation I’d become all too familiar with over the last few weeks. Tears streamed down my face, my breath hitching as I brought my paws up to my face. I fell to my knees, the presence of the staff had become irrelevant. “I’m…I’m sorry,” I exhaled between gasps. “I’m so sorry.”
So there it was. My new reality. It wasn’t what I’d hoped for, but it was what I expected. I didn’t know what I’d do then, and I didn’t know now. Could I go on without Lucky? She was the one fortress in the turbulent seas of my broken mind. She was the one I could always count on. The one that I knew would always be there, no matter what. Now I was convinced she was terrified of me.
I sat there a shattered mess for a long moment, tumbling off that cliff and reaching out for anything to catch myself, but found nothing but jagged stones. I felt a hand on my shoulder, Doctor Gavin attempting to comfort me, I assumed. Until I felt something touch my knee. I looked up, thrown out of the spiral abruptly. Lucky was now just in front of me, licking my leg. I froze, confused. She gently laid down, careful of her bandaged leg as she rested her head on my leg, looking up at me. That was the same leg she’d broken months ago. Finally, I got it. “I hurt you, and you still loved me.”
A wave of relief rushed through me and I looked down at her, eyes glossy with tears. I bent down and rested my head against hers. I laughed, though it sounded more like a sob. For the first time in days, I felt whole again.
Lucky still loved me.
First Prev [Next]

1) Will this be your first dog? If not, what experience do you have owning/training dogs?
I have always been around dogs including growing up with dogs and taking an active role in training and care. Family dogs have included two mutt rescues, two Goldens, and currently two Havanese (which I take care of when they can't travel with my parents).
2) Do you have a preference for rescuing a dog vs. going through a reputable breeder?
I'm open to rescue but would likely need a puppy (as I need to be able to train and socialize early on to get what I'm after)
3) Describe your ideal dog.
A clingy couch potato that doesn't regularly need a lot of stimulation outside of hanging out with me.
4) What breeds or types of dogs are you interested in and why?
It never would have been on my quick list, but looking at my needs no breed comes up more than a Bullmastiff. My concerns are the drool (I'm OCD), and with the size with regard to lifespan, food costs, and physical control- I have a bad back, but that's going to be an issue with any size poorly trained dog and most activity will likely be off leash.
I loved our Goldens and either one would fit nicely into my needs (save the long hair). But I'm worried we got lucky with low energy Goldens (they often didn't get daily activity and yet no behavior or health issues)- so because of energy levels they aren't on my list right now.
I like many of the pitbull breeds, they are a great size, I like the idea of combating the image of the big scary pitbull- but like Goldens they aren't on my list because of worries of energy levels.
I'm not inherently opposed to labs.
I always adored Corgis but I don't think they are a match to my needs (barking, energy levels, small).
I don't want to overly worry about energy levels, obviously most dogs out there don't get the ideal activity levels and they do fine. But it also feels risky going with breeds known to be higher energy.
5) What sorts of things would you like to train your dog to do?
Basics- sit/stay/come/heel/bang
6) Do you want to compete with your dog in a sport (e.g. agility, obedience, rally) or use your dog for a form of work (e.g. hunting, herding, livestock guarding)? If so, how much experience do you have with this work/sport?
No
Care Commitments
7) How long do you want to devote to training, playing with, or otherwise interacting with your dog each day?
I cannot commit to daily walks or fetch, but I'm home all day (and not WFH) so I will be attentive to pooch's needs and he will always get a lot of attention if not activity. I'm prepared for the fact that no two dogs are alike, and things like activity/engagement levels will adjust over time based on my dogs individual needs and his behavior.
Ideally he would spend all day with me, including multiple visits a week to my parents- where he can take advantage of a fenced yard and socialize with their two Havanese (which he would begin right away).
8) How long can you exercise your dog each day, on average? What sorts of exercise are you planning to give your dog regularly and does that include using a dog park?
Not a believer in dog parks. I think I mostly answered this question in the previous.
9) How much regular brushing are you willing to do? Are you open to trimming hair, cleaning ears, or doing other grooming at home? If not, would you be willing to pay a professional to do it regularly?
Similar to exercise I will respond to his needs. I'm not commiting up front to weekly baths and daily tooth brushing, but if his behavior or the vet indicates an area to focus I will do so. On a regular basis I mostly anticipate brushing weeklyish, nails regularly, ears/teeth etc. as needed. It will be more difficult, but the same stuff I keep up with already on my cat.
Personal Preferences
10) What size dog are you looking for?
It doesn't really matter though I'm not usually into smaller dogs.
11) How much shedding, barking, and slobber can you handle?
Barking must be minimal due to apartment living. Shedding and slobber are what they are, like anyone I would prefer zero, some is ok, with the right dog I will learn to love his slobber right? Lol
12) How important is being able to let your dog off-leash in an unfenced area?
Fairly but I'm a believer that virtually any dog is capable of this with decent training.
Dog Personality and Behavior
13) Do you want a snuggly dog or one that prefers some personal space?
I already have a cat, he gives me plenty of personal space to fill with a pooch!
14) Would you prefer a dog that wants to do its own thing or one that’s more eager-to-please?
Eager to please
15) How would you prefer your dog to respond to someone knocking on the door or entering your yard? How would you prefer your dog to greet strangers or visitors?
A bark is fine, but it needs to stop quickly both by command or naturally. Window placement means he wouldn't actually have much visibility to the front yard and cannot see people at the door.
16) Are you willing to manage a dog that is aggressive to other dogs?
No, but he will be socialized with other dogs on a regular basis right out of the gate. This is an example of where I would be apprehensive about rescuing.
17) Are there any other behaviors you can’t deal with or want to avoid?
Not that come to mind
Lifestyle
18) How often and how long will the dog be left alone?
Just for quick errands or appointments, an hour or two here or there.
19) What are the dog-related preferences of other people in the house and what will be their involvement in caring for the dog?
No one else in the home.
20) Do you have other pets or are you planning on having other pets? What breed or type of animal are they?
One cat, he has some exposure to adjustments including dogs, and I'm prepared for a slow introduction process. I'm able to block off an entire room for him with his box and he has lots of vertical options (Jackson Galaxy wouldn't be disappointed).
21) Will the dog be interacting with children regularly?
No
22) Do you rent or plan to rent in the future? If applicable, what breed or weight restrictions are on your current lease?
No
23) What city or country do you live in and are you aware of any laws banning certain breeds?
None that I'm aware of but my vet (family friend) will let me know when I talk breeds with him.
24) What is the average temperature of a typical summer and winter day where you live?
Fairly temperate with the odd spike in heat or cold, nothing unusual.
Additional Information and Questions
25) Please provide any additional information you feel may be relevant.
I'm disabled and there is a potential for a service dog. I don't think this route is worth pursuing though as the main physical service that I would benefit from is with waking (one goal with a dog is bringing some schedule and routine to my days), which any dog is inherently going to do. Otherwise the dog would mostly be serving emotional support needs (eg: providing pressure and comfort during panic attacks will be appreciated, but no need for a dog that can like alert to oncoming attacks). With that limited scope it doesn't seem like it would be worth the time and money to pursue, especially with people in much greater need out there. But, I guess I'm curious if anyone thinks that's worth pursuing.
26) Feel free to ask any questions below.
If I'm not mistaken puppy season is well upon us, if I do have to lean more into rescuing and look for a puppy- other than the obvious behavioral signs what should I look for? Are there mixes to avoid, a certain cutoff age I should set for myself, etc?

*** Comments mentioning anything related to treatment, trying to conceive, or family building measures in this thread will be removed via our OFF TOPIC rule. Consider if you were taking a break from treatment because you were exhausted and sad - treatment (yes anything related to it) goes in treatment **\*
Coping with infertility is complex, and it is our imperative to create places where we can honor the distinctly unique needs created by infertility. Sit beside us and share what’s on your mind and going on in your life. This is a great place to get to know your fellow members outside the gravity of treatment. Discussion here includes, but is not limited to:

• Venting about the impact of infertility on our lives/relationships/careers
• Non-IF Rants of all kind – marriage, career, societal, social media, friendships, mental health, and yes… politics too. It doesn’t need to be infertility related!
• Discussions around dealing with the influence of infertility – therapy, coping methods, finding supportive friends, getting lapped by a friend, dealing with pregnancy announcements, pushy parents, people that don’t understand, etc. The big picture stuff.
• Sharing stories and parts of your life (pictures of pets always welcome!) outside of infertility

​
Example of the difference between the Treatment and Chat Thread:
Comments for the Treatment Thread

• Literally anything that involves or mentions treatment, trying to conceive, or any family building measures: paying for it, being exhausted by it, fighting about it, telling other people about it. If anything about your comment has anything to do with treatment or TTC, it belongs in the treatment thread. Also including diagnostic tests, medication, lab results, or lifestyle measures taking in the hopes of improving treatment outcome.
  • I'm in the TWW, and I'm glad I scheduled a vacation as a distraction!
  • I'm trying to decide if I should delay my egg retrieval cycle because this is a big work month for me.
  • I told my parents about IVF, and they were incredibly supportive. I feel really grateful.

Comments for the Chat Thread

• You can of course still discuss infertility in the chat thread:
  • I am super bummed about being lapped by a friend.
  • I have two currently pregnant coworkers, and I am losing my mind with all the pregnancy discussion.
  • Today is the anniversary of my loss, and I'm really struggling.
• Or you can discuss things unrelated to infertility:
  • Whoa, my dogwalker taught my dog to roll over.
  • There's this donut place next to my work that sells donuts for $5 each, but the WILD thing is that they're worth it!
  • My spouse and I are planning a trip to Europe. Opinions on Italy vs Greece?

A few notes:

• Positive HPT or Beta Results (including Beta Hell) should only be posted in the Results thread as per the rules (except for confirmed loss): https://www.reddit.com/infertility/search?q=flair_name%3A%22Results%22
• We recognize that the AM/PM distinction doesn’t match up with every time zone in our global community, we ask that you pick the most recently posted thread wherever you are.
• Standalone culture here is saved for complex topics, usually including detailed conversations around scientific studies, or asking multi-part complex questions around treatment plans. We strongly recommend posting in the community threads first. If you aren’t sure, ask in the daily threads first!

Above all - Science minded perspective and respect for others is important here. Please treat your fellow peers with compassion.
Last reminder - this is the CHAT thread. Not the place to discuss anything focused on treatment, TTC, or family building measures.

After sixty-seven sessions of Curse of Strahd (read all about it here), it was time for a change. So into the wild we went...
My group is nearing the end of Hither, and along the way I've written summaries of each session ("What Just Happened?"), along with interesting/funny quotes from PCs/NPCs ("Certain Things Were Said"), and a list of new characters introduced that session ("Dramatis Personae").
My intention is to write the summaries for each of the five parts of the campaign in a different format. For the Witchlight Carnival, each summary was presented in verse (my own, no machine learning shortcuts!), using the metre and rhyming structure of various Lewis Carrol poems.
I'd like to share my summaries/poems with you all here, for posterity, and in the hope you'll find them entertaining.
For reference, the players are:

• Holafina (a harengon paladin who has lost three inches of height)
• Skerrek (a kobold druid who has lost the ability to lie)
• Arix (an owlin monk who has lost all sense of direction and is always hungry)
• Jexim (a brash fairy warlock who has lost his diary)
• Sylenos (a beatnik/slacker satyr rogue employed by the Carnival)

NOTE: Lewis Carroll was known to hide secret messages in his poems. I've done the same, revealing the campaign's big twist in one of the poems below. None of my players have picked up on it.

Part I: Welcome to the Witchlight

What Just Happened? (in the style of Jabberwocky)
’Twas twilight when the carnival Did open wide two golden gates, And those with tickets did arrive, Seeking things they had misplaced.
One harengon of curious size, A kobold with a slithy gait, An owlet who possessed two eyes As wide as Annam’s dinner plates.
Yet are we three or are we four? Let’s add vibrations rarefied: A Witchlight hand here to ensure That every guest is Satyrs-fied!
Enter now and taste the sounds, Feel these colours, smell those sights! Kaleidoscopic fun abounds This synaesthesiac’s delight!
Yet where’s the drama? Where’s the tension? Certainly we’ve had a switch (At least in here there is no mention Of that cad von Zarovich).
Instead let’s race a giant snail, Eat candied mushrooms by the pound, Or listen to a gnome assail The tightness of your mother’s gown.
Yet hark! A misadventure glum! Those not heroes please give berth! The best laid plans of love undone By Tasha’s wild unruly mirth
These mirrored halls! This desperate task, To find a luckless paramour A sweet-toothed lass with porcine mask That you could swear you’ve seen before…
’Twas twilight when the carnival Did open wide two golden gates And those with tickets did arrive, Now guided by the wiles of fate.
Dramatis Personae
Arix Specklefoot, a sweet-toothed owlin Holafina, a curiously short harengon Skerrek Tirael, a slithy kobold Sylenos, a cosmic satyr Nicholas Midnight, elderly goblin ticketmaster at the Witchlight Carnival Candlefoot, a mime and not by choice Rubin Sugarwood, a lovesick halfling Ween Sundapple, his laugh-sick paramour Glorange Turple, a poetry gnome
Certain Things Were Said
“I am worried about your ability to sense vibrations that I cannot.” - Skerrek Tirael
“Tymore, goddess of good fortune! Look well upon Shellymoo this day!” - Holafina
“Hate to say it, man, but that gnome really insulted your mother.” - Sylenos
“Snacks?” - Arix Specklefoot

Part II: Lost and Found

What Just Happened? (In the style of The Walrus and the Carpenter )
"The time has come," the Satyr said, "To talk of many things: Of poems—and props—and Jeremy Plum— Of crowns and pixie kings— And why things here keep getting lost— And what this pig-girl means."
"But wait a bit," the Owlin cried, "Before our minds do meet, For some of us are pretty spooked, And I would like a treat!" "No hurry!" said the Satyr, And kicked up cloven feet.
The Owlin and the Kobold Were walking close at hand, They smiled like anything to see The gates of Pixie Land. "If we could only stay a while,” They said, "it would be grand!"
The Satyr sighed so sulkily, Because he thought that Plum Had got no business to be there When all was said and done. (“It's rude of him," the Kobold said, "To try and spoil our fun!")
"Oi, Satyr," said the pixie king, "You've had a pleasant run! Should you be getting back to work?” But answer came there none And this was scarcely odd, because He had real beef with Plum.
Now Arix made a hamster friend Who offered up some clues. The others tried the riding-pug: A pleasant thing to do! (“The pug is fine," the Rabbit said, "But he’s no Shellymoo.”)
"How nice of you to come!” said Plum, "You all are oh-so kind!" Puddlemud said nothing as His teeth began to grind. The Owlin and the Kobold cheered: “That was our FAVORITE ride!”
“A wooden crown," fair Jexim said, Is what we need to come Our way along with golden paint For some un-princely sum.” The others stared, confused, and said: “Now where did YOU come from?”
‘Twas then the party dared approach The famous Mystery Mine Where psychedelic spectacles Broke the Satyr’s mind. (“I really wish,” Zephixo sighed, “You wouldn’t ride while high”).
Next Dirla pulled all kind of things Out of his wagon/portal: Bottles, bunnies, candlesticks, A shining blade of vorpal (Incidentally, there’s a word That kind of rhymes with purple).
“If you put your mind to it And searched for long enough, Do you suppose," the party said, "That you could find our stuff?" "I doubt it," said dear Dirlagraun, And gave a bitter huff.
Then he gave the Harengon The greatest gift by far: A copy of “Gnome On The Run” And bid them au revoir (Morgie would have laughed at that While trying to type slash “R”).
“I do believe,” the Satyr said, “That something is not right, And think we ought to pay a call To Messers Witch and Light.” “I think we ought,” the Owlin said “To first stop for a bite.”
But in their way old Thaco stood, A clown grown grim and surly: “Rabbit! Owlin! Pixie! Skink! You aren’t allowed to be-“ The Fairy interrupted him: “Wait, WHAT did you call me?”
Poor Thaco cried: “Things move too fast! And have since my debut In R-1: To the Aid of Falx From Nineteen Eighty Two! And if you’d seen what I have seen Then you’d smoke bubbles, too!”
Finally he stepped aside, At last the way was clear. The Satyr ambled stealthily With open eyes and ears And pressed them to a wagon large To see what he could hear.
"The time has come," Witch and Light said, "To talk of things galore Of prizes—plans—and kenku pests— and ever so much more— But first we’d better ask inside Those spying at our door!”
Dramatis Personae
Jexim, a puzzled, puzzling fairy Jeremy Plum, operator of the Pixie Kingdom and bestower of silly names Biscuit, a talkative hamster Pinecone, a riding-pug Zephixo, dwarven inventor and mastermind behind the Mystery Mine Ernest Wilde, middle-aged calliope master currently inhabiting the body of his pet monkey Marigold, his button-collecting goblin assistant Dirlagraun, a kindly but inefficient displacer beast, minder of lost children and property Thaco, a bubble-smoking clown who is long past his prime
Certain Things Were Said
"Worried I was, with talk of missing supper." - Arix Specklefoot
"Could you not just purchase a new pair?" - Skerrek Tirael "Not like this, man." - Sylenos
"If you'd see the things I've seen, you'd smoke a bubble pipe, too." - Thaco
"Is this it?" - Dirlagraun "NO." - Everyone

Part III: On the Trail of the Kenku

What Just Happened? (In the style of The Hunting of the Snark)
"Where the heck is our stuff? We just want to know This Harengon ain't getting bigger, Arix has no idea of where to go And lies send poor Skerrek a-quiver!"
"Would you get back to work?" Mister Light cried, Twirling his cane with a smile, "Otherwise find where this kenku pest hides; She's cramping this carnival's style!"
"Well, that was a bust," said our heroes, conferring, "Anyone got a suggestion? If we need to pull strings to get back our things Then there are some folk we should question."
"Time's an illusion, free will a delusion!" Sylenos' mentor decreed, "Get a contusion battling occlusions, Or relax and have some of this…wait, what was I saying?"
Sylenos proclaimed: "A genius flawed!" "A man/dragon ahead of his time." Skerrek looked at his claws; Holafina at paws, And the other two just rolled their eyes
"A centuar I'm not! I just made a bad trade The "Cloppinton's" just serendipitous, Now lend me your aid and you'll maybe persuade These horsies to drop some significance."
Then they took to the skies on a dragonfly ride (Holafina and Skerrek abreast), When you're this high there's just nowhere to hide (And to which Sylenos attests)
Now Skerrek honed on a runaway gnome Who was fleeing the carnage with glee, Holafina struck home and that's it for this poem For the gnome was the kenku, you see.
Dramatis Personae
Mister Witch, a matter-of-fact elf, devoid of pretense Mister Light, a flamboyant elf, luminous and coy Burly, a philosophical, pumpkin-helmeted bugbear Mandragon, a seeker of truth (and not much else) Diana Cloppington, a centaur who is apparently not, operator of the Carousel Northwind, a very forthcoming treant, operator of the Dragonfly Rides
Certain Things Were Said
"There’s something weird going on. For some reason everyone thinks I don’t do anything around the carnival." - Sylenos
"It's true, Miss Cloppinton! We've ALL lost things." - Arix Specklefoot
"Wait, when did we have biscuits?" - Jexim

Part IV: Through the Looking Glass

What Just Happened? (In the style of A Boat Beneath a Sunny Sky)
Now hear the Kenku’s strange reply (As Arix struggles to apply Triage to these pixie guys)
Asking questions, getting nought Set her on a different course: High sabotage without remorse!
And what has got her so irate Is what’s she trying to intimate: Zybilna has been quiet of late!
Ignore the rest, and let’s take flight To confront dear Witch and Light (Surprisingly, they’re quite contrite)
To keep the carnival in motion A tapestry of lies was woven: A deal with the Hourglass Coven!
Who take from those who can’t afford Entrance through the Witchlight’s doors Miscellanea adored
So THAT’s who taken all your junk! Time to find these Hourglass punks! Which way to this Feywild dump?
But first we’ll make a brief aside So Candlefoot can vocalise His mermaid love (now legalised)
Now the pair can tie the knot And while we’re passing time why not Ride the fabled Bubble Pot?
Yet ere you all are translocated (Everybody’s breath now bated) Arix must be coronated!
The time of truth has come at last Hesitation as you pass Though the hallowed looking glass
Are you afraid to lose your minds? What lies ahead? What lies behind? What do you expect to find?
Will Skerrek ever fabricate? Or Holafina emulate A bunny’s median height and weight?
Shall Jexim’s memoirs find acclaim? Can Monty locate Bobbitt Fane? (…hang on, that’s a different game)
Does Arix ever find the door? And will Sylenos flee the cause To study unemployment law?
Dramatis Personae
Kettlesteam, a mischievous patron of Zybilna Paleesha, a mellifluous mermaid, now reunited with Candlefoot
Certain Things Were Said
“Sylenos, perhaps in eight years you can come back and find your lost employment.” - Skerrek
“Ask me where the exit is.” - Arix Specklefoot “Where is the exit?” - Mister Light “I don’t know.” - Arix

This is a long read sorry!
Hi, I (22F) literally just joined, I have been on reddit for a while now, I post here or there but I really need the grace that only reddit seems to have, kisses but you know it's true. So, I guess, I am screaming into the void, because the truth is I am so gutturally confused.
Like the title says- I have always fantasized of being a flower child, a changeling, of turning towards the corner of the yard, the woods beckoning me to run away, the gentleness of which the coyotes would pick my bones clean. My childhood felt like a house fire only I could see.
My father's nightcap of whiskey got less and less watered down as nights were uncomfortable to spend on the family room couch. The one that he fiercely protects, once threatening my friend who mistakenly lounged in his spot. My mother's love felt scarce, a luxury only my younger sister could afford. Between that and her ambition to become the first nurse and college graduate of both families, I was more of my father's daughter. My younger sister and I were doll-like children, meek and polite to the price of our own dignity and self. To give a brief snapshot of what it was like being raised by them \~ even though "I'm remembering it all wrong, or not at all" I will try to go in chronological order, but you can quickly see most of these were not isolated incidents and I jump around:
-daily spankings because of crying during daycare drop off (fair technique)
-tricking us out of the "broken" car, in the rain on a dirt road "get gas" and proceeded to speed past us laughing as we ran after his taillights in the mud, we were in another country, on a solo trip with just our dad, we were both elementary school age.
-In elementary school and 6th grade I lived in a sweatshirt because when I hit puberty. I pleaded to my mother how hard it was to hear my father's constant comments about my womanhood and new body. He started to compare me to a hooker around this time, calling me a slut for trying to wear what my friends wore to school- leggings, shorts shorter than the knee but not offensively short I promise, though I strongly feel as clothing does not mean consent.
-For as long as I can remember, he would take pictures of us when we looked embarrassed then show it to family, friends, whoever in conversation in front of us then scold us when we inevitably felt bad or asked him to stop. He would also promise to delete the photo but would continue the previously mentioned above.
-So far, I have just been harping on my father, but the truth is they are a match made in hell, and though I feel like my mother is a victim in her own way. It was very hard to exist without their constant horrible comments about my appearance and character. They both shamed skinny children to be thinner, critiqued my body through puberty, and felt entitled to touch my body when and how they wanted. Examples include my father's frequent ass grabbing, and then allowing his adult male friend to do the same.
-They both would ridicule me for working minimum wage jobs in high school, while my father funnels out of my sister and I's joint accounts, only when we confront him does he fess that he required the money we earned for ourselves for the "mortgage". He continues as well as set monetary account goals, right before trips or plans, he would always be surprised that we had managed to scrape together enough money. He expects me to find a place that will fire and schedule me on a winter vacation, or to amount 5k in less than 3 months, while paying for my own necessities, thank you for teaching me to live on frugality as a means of survival.
-The name calling I touched on, but I would be the first to come home from school, my father would take his lunch to come home and berate me verbally of how much of a loser I am and will continue to be. The verbal arguments were daily, I fully admit to yelling back but in truth I couldn't leave his spewing red face hurling threats, I had to stay glued in place until he had his fill.
-Another solo trip with my father and sister, my mother had cleaned my room while we were away and had found my treasures- vapes, two beers. I got pulled out of the running shower to be beaten on and off through the night whenever my father took a break from tv, my sister sob in the room with my father to stop and I sat on the couch until morning. We had a tourist excursion the next day and I got it again before we left because I was not to "ruining the rest of his vacation with my bad attitude"
-They locked away my childhood cat, sick with cancer, to die alone in the basement so she would ruin their floors with her incontinence. When she passed, they did not tell me, they buried her in the woods behind our house, I wish I could lay beside her, I'm sorry little one.
-My father would come home and yell at me for not having dinner ready for him, because when my mother worked late or was not home, the next one responsible for dinner was my younger sister or me.
-He physically corners us or refuses to let us leave. Threatened my life when I tried to leave the house during an argument.
-Put his hand through the door a couple of times because I “gave attitude” by responding with ok. Readers, please note I am capable of attitude, but this was not the case, I was scared, and I just wanted to give him whatever answer he wanted
-I'm a summer birthday, so for my big 21st I had my cousin, bf and sister have a pool party in my parents' pool. No one told me the plan all day. I was told to just relax by everyone, because normally I would be running around serving people or helping my parents. No one told me anything, so we played some games in the yard, had some wine coolers and then swam. My father flies outside and starts yelling at me from the side of the pool to get my ass out and blow out my candles because he needs to drive my cousin 20 minutes home each way. So, I blew out my candles, soaking wet staring daggers because my father has always managed to underplay or make me feel bad on my birthday too? Another grievance from my 21st birthday is that my father grilled frozen steaks, and I truly do not want to seem like a stuck-up princess, but he proceeded to buy 300$ of food from my favorite restaurant and his favorite food is steak not mine. Note his birthday is the next day following mine.
I may post in regard to the tribulation that was my childhood in this thread again, but it takes a lot out of me, and I have already had myself a day sorry. Now you're all caught up and I just want you to know-
I have long ruminated over my own words and actions; though I have many regrets I do not feel ashamed of my choices or who I am because I try to treat everyone with kindness and most importantly respectability. I know the lengths my immigrant parents have gone through to build themselves a life. I know the struggles my father had with his father, the alcoholic who raised him with cruelty reserved for not even a barn animal. I know that my mother lived in the shadows as a neglected middle child hoping to find someone who realized all her good in the way her parents did not. I can see and understand that I carry the same wounds, and now it is within my responsibility to be better.
So, my relationship with my parents is strained right now. I have been in low contact with my mother and father for nearly four years, with periods of better contact. We have tried therapy, though it's difficult as my mother uses this as an opportunity to explore her wounds rather than our history or relationship. Though the therapist was helpful in directing the conversation back, I believe that the work can only happen with the person wanting to actually work on themselves, so I feel like I am at a frustrating impasse.
Every time I feel like I can take out a brick between the wall I keep between us, my mother will say something that makes me build another layer. I try not to be sensitive, yet I know my mother likes to cut with her words, though she claims otherwise. In a recent conversation my mother admitted that my father and she spent a great effort in making sure my beauty did not go to my head and did this in order to keep me humble.
For context, my mother’s side of the family does not like my father, and this along with other childhood issues festering into adulthood drove a wedge between my mother and her younger brother. His recent divorce and my mother’s empty nest have given them much time and space to rekindle their sibling relationship. So on our already strained phone calls she hits me with these metaphors of her brother and her relationship to ours. Am I off for thinking that those are two very different relationships, yet both have.. Jealousy? Furthermore, I feel a looney because I am fighting to keep them in my life, and they are fighting to be right.? To be absolved of the guilt and shame that maybe they did do the wrong thing.?
What gives them the right? When we all have to lay away at night with our guilt you want me to hold yours? I want a mother and they want a guiltless soul
Truthfully, I do not know what kind of future lies ahead for us. I think I grieve having bullies instead of parents, of what I missed out on and who I could have been. Like I said I am low contact right now, but after a normal phone call talking about the weather and our pets today, I had an anxiety attack to the point I fought to stay conscious. This has not been the first time I have fainted due to anxiety, mostly surrounding situations that remind me of them or things they punished or did to me in the past. The day after I wished my father a happy birthday after a year of no contact, I got two pills of ativan to the face after a ER visit in which they thought my poor bf was trafficking me. Though this is maybe too much, I am always sweating, my sides literally pour, my hands shake, and I can string together a sentence if I try. I feel like a different person, a moist, meek person.. which is not me, I self tattoo and pierce, I can and have tackled an attacking dog and I have punched touchy men square in the nose. I’m tough because I fought tooth and nail to be kind and gentle, we rescued cats and recently a possum, and we let out spiders and bugs, so our cats don’t terrorize them.
Here’s the thing… we’re getting married!
We’re tying the knot in the woods at the end of May, but I feel like an asshole because I have not told my parents. They know we’re engaged.
My mother, in a recent phone call, told me of this travel nurse that she had gotten close to, that was getting married soon, and invited my mother to go dress shopping with her. My mother told me how sad this girl felt that her family was all the way across the country, coincidently much like we are. This felt like she was guilting me, but she went so far as to send me a picture of a couple, I didn’t verify who it actually was.
Another issue is I am dealing with the guilt of getting a ring and bands elsewhere. My father is a high-end jeweler whose work has been showcased by celebs, my whole life I heard that my father was going to design and make my engagement ring. After long consideration, we picked out a ring from Madrid that felt more like me. When I look at my wedding rings I want to think of my husband not my father. I am more than happy with anything else, rings for other occasions, but it makes my skin crawl and my stomach curling because part of me feels as if it's more of a collar than a ring then.
My mother wants to meet over memorial weekend, she wants me to fly out a day to visit before I’m getting married.
I do not know if I should facetime them and break the news before, after or invite them. It’s already last minute so airfare will be expensive, but I know they are going to be so heartbroken. Part of me does not want them there either because I have felt alone my whole life, I figured I would do my wedding the same way, though it's hard because my fiancé's family will be there, and I will have no one. I wish I could hire a friend... lol typed that with a tear in my eye that's ironic.
Suggestions please

you can love and be with real people but you guys are on a cringefest to justify getting cuddly with bears crocs or tigers.
have fun with creatures that will rip your face off if they feel like.
they are not pet dogs or cats.

Hello,
I, F (23) have been texting/calling with a M (30), we had a first date i believe 3 or 4 weeks ago, we went for drinks at a restaurant. It was going well and he then asked to go for a drive, but before we could even get into his car, he kissed me and it was lovely. We then went inside his car for a heavy petting/make out session but I kept second guessing myself and stopped it from going further. He asked if i wanted to go to his place to meet his dog, and of course i said yes.
we were at his place and we just cuddled and watched a movie, about this time its 2 AM and well, after the movie ended, we started fooling around and you can guess what happened next. After the first time, we cuddled and had pillow talk for about 2 hours, then we did it again and around 4 AM we decided to fall asleep. in my mind, i was thinking this isn't just some hook up, people don't have pillow talk for 2 hours or spend the night. they typically just go straight into it and then sleep together then leave. However, when i woke up in the morning, he was awake for like maybe 2 minutes and i heard him on his phone. He was on this app for maybe a literal 15 seconds. All i heard was "swipe, swipe, swipe, buzz buzz"
Yeah...he was on a dating app and matched with someone. So a minute later he asks if i was awake and i tell him "yeah..were you just on a dating app? I heard you match with someone so congrats"
He responded with the "whattt, how did you know? wait- now you're going to think im not serious about you". of course i responded with a "well yeah" and he said "but i am serious about you"
I brushed it off, thinking i was wrong that maybe this was a 1 time thing. However, he still texts me every day and sometimes calls me a few times a week but he only sees me on fridays? He also told me that he wants to be exclusive. we've been going about this for going on 4 weeks now. I somehow feel he doesn't take me seriously, we have gone out in public and all, but last Friday he upset and I was getting dressed to leave. He was stopping me, but when he was talking to me as i was putting on my shoes, he wasn't even facing me. Mind you, he was asking me to stay and to not be upset with him and just come back to bed. But why wouldn't he face me? he was half turned facing the opposite way but with his head turned to his side so i was in his peripheral vision. Was it because he doesn't like showing vulnerability? was it because he doesn't take me seriously?
My friend told me that he probably just settled on me, and when i told my situationship about this he actually got upset with me and said i ruined the vibe of our relationship or whatever this is? which the only reason i have doubts about us is solely because he was on a dating app while i was in his bed next to him.
**TL;DR;** i can't tell if my situationship is serious about me or not

🆘🆘URGENT * URGENT * URGENT🆘🆘
🚨 Honey Graham (#A546098) is now URGENT. She needs RESCUE PLACEMENT by TOMORROW, WEDNESDAY 5/15 or she will be EUTHANIZED. She is at Orange County Animal Services, ORLANDO, FL🚨
She needs RESCUE & FOSTER and PLEDGES 🙏❤️😭
Sharing a post from Urgent Dogs of Orlando:
https://www.facebook.com/61554543816308/posts/pfbid029GF211Kg84gqUhF85TRRnXp1HDC3qbr5vrKErUpPwCThm3vQdsyCqwHCUb5xpE78l/?app=fbl
🚨🚨 FINAL POST NEEDS RESCUE PLACEMENT BY TOMORROW, WEDNESDAY, MAY 15TH or she will be euthanized.
She is at Orange County Animal Services in Orlando, FL. We posted her before, now she has an urgent deadline. She was abandoned behind a store and she should not have to die because no one seems to want her. She also cannot sit endlessly at the shelter waiting for help. She's friendly. She might need surgery. Please help share. Please tag any Rottie lovers you may know.
HONEY GRAHAM #A546098 - This dog is an unaltered female. This dog is currently located in CLIND18. This dog weighs approximately 50.0 lbs., is 3Y and has tested negative for heartworm disease. This dog is being posted to rescue due to medical.
Meet Honey Graham!
She was found at the backside of Sally's store on OBT. She was panting and having trouble walking and was taken to the VEC as she was found after hours. Once at the shelter and upon x-rays, our veterinarian discovered that she has a subluxated hip (right) and she might need surgery.
Presenting problem/concern: Transfered from VEC with reported subluxated right hip Additional history: (See records from VEC) Mentation: OAR Temp & Pulse:not done - visual exam only
Respiration: Eupneic
Physical Exam/Observations: No nasal or ocular discharge. Weight bearing all four limbs. Unwilling to walk. Last dose of pain medications at 2am 4/24/24 (Hydromorphone). Rimadyl and Cerenia on 4/23/24. No radiographs provided. Assessment: Reported subluxated right hip. Recommendation(s): Requested radiographs, BupeSR, and intakes. **If this pet is returned to its previous or original owner and has medical conditions, please issue an official notice for follow-up vet care (see OCAS veterinarian for timeframe.
SHE IS CURRENTLY ON ANTIBIOTICS DUE TO PRESENTING SIGNS OF AN UPPER RESPIRATORY INFECTION
Honey Graham is friendly and when walked around other dogs, she was indifferent to them. She is also HW negative!
➡️ If you are a rescue and can help Honey Graham, please email the shelter at: Rescue.Coordinator@ocfl.net
➡️ If you want to foster for a rescue, please also email the shelter and send a private message to Urgent Dogs of Orlando on Facebook.
List of rescue partners for Orange County Animal Services (Orlando, FL): http://www.ocnetpets.com/ProgramsServices/Rescues/RescuePartners.aspx
Link to her Shelter Profile:
https://www.ocnetpets.com/Adopt/AnimalsinShelter.aspx?animalid=A546098
📌 If you cannot foster Honey Graham, but you can PLEDGE to help her, please post a comment below with your pledge amount or post your pledge on the original post. No amount is too small.
Please help save Honey Graham! Please share her 🙏❤️

Hello, college student here looking to get a dog!
Introduction
1) Will this be your first dog? If not, what experience do you have owning/training dogs?

• My family owned one dog before but I was not involved in taking care of him since I was just a kid back then.

2) Do you have a preference for rescuing a dog vs. going through a reputable breeder?

• I want to go with a reputable breeder.

3) Describe your ideal dog.

• My ideal dog would be medium or large-sized.

4) What breeds or types of dogs are you interested in and why?

• Golden retriever. Some people in my neighborhood have them and they’re always very friendly.

5) What sorts of things would you like to train your dog to do?

• Obedience and catch for fun.

6) Do you want to compete with your dog in a sport (e.g. agility, obedience, rally) or use your dog for a form of work (e.g. hunting, herding, livestock guarding)? If so, how much experience do you have with this work/sport?

• Just a normal house dog.

Care Commitments
7) How long do you want to devote to training, playing with, or otherwise interacting with your dog each day?

• On weekdays, an hour. On weekends, three to five hours. I will be in college, but I live with my family so the house will rarely be empty.

8) How long can you exercise your dog each day, on average? What sorts of exercise are you planning to give your dog regularly and does that include using a dog park?

• There’s a park near to my house which is open to pets. Dogs are also allowed for walks on the streets in the whole neighborhood but they must be leashed.

9) How much regular brushing are you willing to do? Are you open to trimming hair, cleaning ears, or doing other grooming at home? If not, would you be willing to pay a professional to do it regularly?

• I can do regular brushing. Okay with the other stuff too as long as they’re simple enough.

Personal Preferences
10) What size dog are you looking for?

• Medium or large.

11) How much shedding, barking, and slobber can you handle?

• Minimal barking, shedding, and slobber. My mother likes to keep things clean.

12) How important is being able to let your dog off-leash in an unfenced area?

• Doesn’t matter much to me.

Dog Personality and Behavior
13) Do you want a snuggly dog or one that prefers some personal space?

• Can let me do my work when I have to, can come snuggle once I am free.

14) Would you prefer a dog that wants to do its own thing or one that’s more eager-to-please?

• Leaning to eager-to-please.

15) How would you prefer your dog to respond to someone knocking on the door or entering your yard? How would you prefer your dog to greet strangers or visitors?

• Nothing aggressive.

16) Are you willing to manage a dog that is aggressive to other dogs?

• No. I would prefer a dog that is not aggressive.

17) Are there any other behaviors you can’t deal with or want to avoid?

• Excessive shedding and too much noise.

Lifestyle
18) How often and how long will the dog be left alone?

• Rarely will the house ever be empty. There are five of us.

19) What are the dog-related preferences of other people in the house and what will be their involvement in caring for the dog?

• Feed or walk him if I’m outside or studying inside.

20) Do you have other pets or are you planning on having other pets? What breed or type of animal are they?

• No.

21) Will the dog be interacting with children regularly?

• Youngest child in the house is 12.

22) Do you rent or plan to rent in the future? If applicable, what breed or weight restrictions are on your current lease?

• We own our house.

23) What city or country do you live in and are you aware of any laws banning certain breeds?

• Philippines. I’m not aware of any laws regarding this.

24) What is the average temperature of a typical summer and winter day where you live?

• Tropical and maritime climate. Humid. No winters. Temperature will range from 22-38 degrees Celsius.

Additional Information and Questions
25) Please provide any additional information you feel may be relevant.

• Nothing to note.