So I’ve been genuinely afraid to ask anyone in my real life about this because it feels so strange and I’ve never really heard anyone else talk about something like this so here it goes.
Is it normal to have a second person in your head? And by that I don’t mean like an inner monologue where you have two different trains of thought, and I don’t mean intrusive thoughts you don’t mean. I mean it feels like I have another person in my head that talks with me sometimes. I know this sounds crazy but I don’t really have another way to explain what it feels like.
For reference I am a 21 year old woman. This other voice is a guy around my age named James. He has specific interests and ideas that when I think about he turns up to talk about them with me. We have direct back and forth and can interrupt each other just like a real conversation. I have no real control over his thoughts and sometimes they don’t reflect my own opinions, for example we argue about characters in shows that I watch/what genres of music we enjoy. He doesn’t have a physical appearance that I can picture. I can, as weird as this sounds “feel” what space he occupies. I feel very much like I exist in my right brain, he feels like he lives in the front left. That probably sounds crazy lol but it’s the best way to describe the sensation.
I don’t really know what this is but I don’t think it’s schizophrenia or something like that. For one thing I don’t really fit any symptoms of it besides this as a possible delusion, for another James has never suggested that I cause harm to myself or others. Frankly sometimes he is a voice of reason and tries to talk me through times where I’m being panicky or unreasonably angry. I have heard of DID but I don’t think that fits this situation either because I haven’t experienced him “taking over” for me.
He’s a comforting presence if I’m honest and he’s not exactly impeding with my everyday life, I just wonder if this is a normal experience (or, if not normal, at least someone else out there has had it too).
So is this something that other people experience? I’m sure James would like to know, too.

This is a weekly thread to discuss train games and 18xx games, which are a family of economic train games consisting of shared ownership in railroad companies. For more information, see the description on BGG. There’s also a subreddit devoted entirely to 18xx games, /18xx, and a subreddit devoted entirely to Age of Steam, /AgeOfSteam.
Here’s a nice guide on how to get started with 18xx.
Feel free to discuss anything about train games, including recent plays, what you're looking forward to, and any questions you have. If you want to arrange to play some 18xx or other train games online, feel free to try to arrange a game here or in our weekly BGIF posts.

The backstory in Curse makes no sense. Chucky wouldn’t become this obsessed with anyone unless it was for revenge. Plus why would he want a woman to start a family with? He had Tiffany and she wanted a family too. And where does Eddie connect in all this?
How I would’ve done it would be Chucky being Sarah’s brother instead who he looked after for years after killing their parents. Not wanting to be fully alone and wanting some kind of partner in crime. But like GG never wanted to kill. One day she ran away from Chucky and started a new life. She even reported him to the police and got him on the run. One day Chucky found her, stalked her for a bit finding out what she’s been up to, killed her husband then kidnapped her. He kept her hostage and tortured her for leaving him and spreading his name, now always having to hide when he goes out. One day while he was taunting her, Eddie stayed in the van to have a smoke. The police got called cuz of Tiffany, he stabbed her in the stomach and everything played out the same. When he comes back for Nica and reveals himself he says “it’s me, Nica. Uncle Chucky”. Honestly Chucky being Sarah’s brother and Nica and Barbara’s uncle makes him killing Barbara by saying “you have your mother’s eyes, and they were always too fucking close together!”. Cuz he’s literally talking about his sister who he raised
How would you have done it?

((Hey guys. So happy this sub exists. In the spirit of promoting activity I wanted to add this little rant I posted in a discord server))
So, I’ve been skirting around the edges of the acotar fandom looking for subreddits that just kind of take the books for what they are, and I’ve seen a lot of people wanting to pair Elain and Lucian or Azriel up. Like I know they’re mates but they have barely interacted. Plus I lowkey think elain would stab him herself if she could,,, not that I really remember why she just is awkward and kind of dislikes him. So shipping them at this point seems a bit premature.
I would really like a ‘redemption’ for Lucian. I think his character kind of fell off after acotar. He was my favorite then for his loyalty, sass and rule bending, but his loyalty led him back to tamlin. That in itself isn’t necessarily a bad thing because it gives a chance for character development and was consistent with his character, but apparently the aforementioned rule bending was a special case and he’s an absolute stickler to them. (Or at least, that’s how it appears in the beginning of acomaf.) since then he’s just appeared kind of stiff, closed off and awkward. If Elain gets with Azriel I feel like Lucian would deserve a novella coming to terms with his friend sucking, mate rejecting him and just him overall finding joy in life.
I think Azriel is also a bit premature but I’m a little biased. I love how chill he is and have kind of been headcanoning him as ace but I know he’s not ;-; I do find their friendship very cute and wouldn’t be mad if it developed in that manner though.
(side rant: I know she probably wouldn’t because sex sells, but I think SJM would be really good at a story about an ace character. Her books have themes of found family and friends she does really well. Combined with how she tells these slow stories of healing like with Nesta in acosf and Feyre in acomaf, I think she could put together an amazing story about an asexual character finding people who accept them and support them even if they don’t really get it. And for me and a lot of other gays, especially aces, that would be so therapeutic.)

[M4F/A] Long-Term Literate Vampire: The Masquerade Roleplay / Potential Shadowrun & Cyberpunk Fantasy RP Original Characters 18+ (No Minors)
Greetings, friends! I am Outcast but I also go by Necromes just don't call me late for the graveyard party, huh? Okay I'm sorry.
Anywho, a little tiny bit about me is I am currently 21(M) but turn 22 on the 24th of this month. I have over ten years of writing experience that I am still at times trying to perfect or even change up for every roleplay to find one that suits me. I can write from advanced lit to novella easily. I don't do one liners and I will not roleplay with minors of any age; only 18+. Smut is off the table, I only do romance and slow burn romance at that. I am not here for your visceral satisfaction.
I am here today to offer up a Vampire: The Masquerade TTRPG play-by-post/text-based roleplay within the universe. Now, I must admit that I was a bit hesitant to write this post because I have a few ocs but non of them are properly finished by sheets. The good thing is I'm one of those roleplayers who like to gush over and discuss plots and roleplay a lot before even starting because the care of ocs and plot is just as important to me.
I have been on and off on the VtM fandom since 2019, a friend of mine introduced me to it and I've been hooked to it from a distance for years and after some personal stuff happened I've decided to delve into it solo and its been fun, doing my own thing but doing it solo means I'm alone in it pretty much. I want to have some fun and use them. Let's do that.
We can do quite a lot, a few of my ocs have a specific vibe to them and a setting that I'd prefer to talk about later on since I cannot choose what kinds of plots I want premeditated. I'm honestly in the process of being stuck on adding to my OC lists and want to make more for almost every clan so having somebodu to help create new OCs with is perfectly valid.
I will list a few ocs.

• Samuel Wyrick-Giovanni ; Polish Giovanni capo based in New Orleans.
• Arnie Volkov ; Russian Malkavian who is an extreme conman.
• Drake Mannon ; Highly functioning sociopathic Tremere who was a former cultist. (My personal favorite, but he seems dry to me so I'd like to try him out.)
• Elijah Ardelean ; Ravnos, L.A Anarch who is the Anarch's thieving spy. A pretty boy. Also a cat dad.

I also have a few ocs that are kept as backburners and maybe a few other ocs ideas I intend on making and, hey, who knows maybe these interactions can give me new ideas.
I would prefer to use Drake as he is my newest and most hyperfixated on. I wrote him into a box where he doesn't seem to have much personality when it comes to interactions because I haven't used him yet and he was written for a server that largely has no plot so he has no predetermined goals as of yet and I would like to utilize him and test him out.

Note: I am looking for a long-term relaxed and chill roleplay experience. I have immense ADHD and Autism and get burnt out very quickly and I'd rather take my time to create the best RP response I can muster up than be forced or egged on post after post with no energy. As long as you are okay with varying response window times and are okay with the quality in the end and also have time to chill and talk about OCs on the offtime or on the side then that is perfect.

(Smaller note, a side note if you will; I have recently been trying to get into Shadowrun and have been itching for a Shadowrun/Fantasy Sci-Fi Cyberpunk RP so if you want to undermine this for that go right ahead because I'm addicted to both rn. [I'm still a rookie.])

• If you're down with Shadowrun/Cyberpunk Fantasy, I've got an orc male, young rookie on a rep and revenge kick. Had two cybernetic arms and carries dual pistols, is kind of a hardheaded weapons expert who comes from a family of mercenaries. Specialist in certain things just not professionalism, etiquette, or business finesse and can be considered the brute. Hes a good guy, a lot of personal baggage and personal rage issues but isn't a psycho case nor a squeaky clean rookie.

If you're down for all of that (sorry for my lack of actual planning.), then shoot me a DM telling me what you think and maybe some of your own ocs pitched because I love hearing about VtM ocs.

Note: To make it less confusing and for privacy reasons, names of cities/areas are given fake names.
My family and I (25F) are going to be moving to Oakville in the next couple of months. I’m not excited about it. Mainly because I’m going to be farther away from my boyfriend whom I love dearly, but also because I’m going to be extremely lonely once we move.
When I was about 4, my family moved to Stoneway where I spent the majority of my life there. Then, in 2020, we had to move to Grayton (about 32 minutes away from Stoneway). I had to say goodbye to my close friends whom I’ve grown up with since elementary and high school, something I never thought I had to do so that was hard on me emotionally. When we moved to Grayton I was extremely lonely and had a hard time adjusting to the new home. I don't like major changes, and I felt homesick for my old house and friends. I don't know if it's normal to feel that way as an adult, I felt like a kid.
After living in this area for about 4 years, I've gotten used to it. I don't love it, I find the area very boring. I still miss Stoneway. Now, my dad recently found a new workplace, in Oakville. I've never been there, I don't know what the area or people there are like. When I found out that we were going to move again, I looked on google maps to see how far is Oakville from where my boyfriend and our friend group live (Summerdale). And depending on what street we move to, it's about 55 minutes to an hour by car...
While this has pushed me further to get my driver's license, with the way that I am, I'm going to be lonely and unhappy in Oakville. Sure, I could always go visit places alone, but I can only do that so much to the point that I start wishing I had my friends with me. And since my friends are adults, some of them are either still in school or working full-time jobs, and some of them might not be willing to drive that far (gas is hella expensive in my province) or take a bus for 2 hours.
I thought about downloading BumbleBFF, but didn’t because A) the idea of paying money every month just to use an app to make friends sounds weirdly dystopian to me, and B) I’m very cautious over people online/apps because, for all I know, they could be a liar or looking for their next victim.
Some important context: I have mild autism, which affects how I socialize with some people. I’m not a social butterfly but I find that when I’m introduced to/meet the right people, I can keep a conversation going. Another reason that I’m not going to go into why because it’s extremely personal, is that I also have major trust issues when it comes to making friends.
I want to make friends in the new area so that I don’t have to go to places alone all the time, so that I won’t feel sad every time I see friends having fun, so that I don’t waste my life rotting in bed and going to work when I could be going to events with people who like me and making memories.
But the thought of having to open myself up to someone who may have negative intentions, or could later turn out to be a bad friend, or something worse… terrifies me.
TLDR; I'm a 25F who is moving to a new city and wants to make new friends in that area, but I have issues socializing and trusting people.
Any advice is appreciated <3

Hi Reddit,
I'm in need of some advice regarding my current marital situation and the potential sale of our home. To give you the full picture, I'll start from the beginning. Apologies for the length, but I feel all the details are necessary to understand the context.
I (29F) met my husband (40M) on Tinder four years ago. We dated for about eight months when my family had an opportunity to purchase a property. My then-boyfriend was also looking to be involved in a business deal of that sort, and he was interested in having his name on the property as well. My father supported this, seeing as how my boyfriend was a physician with a good income, and saw this as a way to bring him closer to our family. The opportunity came quickly, and we all signed the contract to purchase the house.
Trouble began shortly after this. My boyfriend requested that only he and I be on the title of the house, removing the rest of my family, as he saw a future with us and envisioned it as our potential family home. My father was very pleased to hear this and supported it, so we obliged. During this time, the property had increased in value, and I requested the other family members be paid off so we could buy out their shares. My boyfriend declined, feeling it was unfair.
To skim over some details, here are the highlights of the construction: My boyfriend paid more for the down payment than we initially realized would be required. Because of this, he paid no further construction costs. The construction proceeded with debt from my family until the construction loans came through. My family paid for the construction, and my father built the house for us without charging for his management services. My father was displeased with my boyfriend’s behavior and required him to pay more money for the construction due to inflation and the COVID shutdown. My boyfriend declined, and my mother and I secretly took out a line of credit to front the construction costs to my father, pretending it was from my boyfriend. Eventually, as we got the construction loans on a rolling basis after meeting construction milestones, my mother’s line of credit was paid off.
During this time, my family and I wondered why my boyfriend had not proposed. I decided that if he hadn't proposed by a certain time, I would leave him. Fortunately, he did propose on Valentine’s Day 2022. By spring of 2022, construction was coming to an end, and it was time for us to settle into the house. My fiancé felt uncomfortable with how much money he had put into the house and was worried I could leave him and make a profit. I promised him I wouldn’t leave him, but it wasn’t enough. He said he would believe me if I had a child with him, otherwise women would leave men if there were no ties. I told him I would have a child with him right when we got married. He suggested I come off birth control, as it takes months for a woman’s cycle to normalize after being on birth control for many years. I promised him I would come off birth control.
Coming off birth control was more stressful than I realized. I was very hormonal, breaking out, and felt unlike myself. This contributed to my fiancé and I fighting more than usual. In one particularly heated fight, I told him I would go back on birth control and even purchased the pills, but he told me he would break up with me if I did because he wanted to get to know the real me. I conceded, and then something switched in me and I became excited at the possibility of having a baby. I started tracking my cycle and figuring out my ovulation days. I shared this with my fiancé, and on one of those days, we got pregnant. I didn’t find out until the end of summer 2022. When I did find out, I told my fiancé and suggested we should probably get married.
My fiancé's first response was that we should wait to see if the baby sticks, and if it does, then we can plan a marriage but he wanted to wait until February 2023. I was very disappointed and angry and yelled at him. I felt alone and overwhelmed by the thought of having an illegitimate child. After discussing potentially getting an abortion, potentially breaking up, and potentially selling the house, I talked my fiancé into keeping the baby and getting married. He also wanted to keep the baby but was afraid of our situation. After many fights about when to have the wedding, we finally decided on December 2022. At that point, I was four months pregnant. During this time, my fiancé and I had major arguments that therapy couldn’t even remedy. We would yell at each other, slam doors, I would cry, and he would hold himself up in a room for hours. We had nice moments too, but they were heavily clouded over by the bad.
Finally, we got married, and things were good for a while. But then we faced some marital problems. My husband kept separate accounts and managed the finances himself. We had a joint credit card where I could pay for expenses without being questioned. He made all of the major investment decisions and major purchases. If I tried to disagree or speak up, he would get upset because this was not the submissive wife I had promised him I would be. I made significantly less money than him but lived a good lifestyle, buying almost anything I wanted within reason. Coming from a traditional family, I was upset that finances were kept separate. And so it continued that my husband would invest tens of thousands of dollars into our house so that his family from out of town would visit. We live in Vancouver, Canada, but his family is from Ottawa. In hopes of luring his youngest sister (of four) to Vancouver, my husband would make any modification to the house that his youngest sister showed the slightest interest in. This included a hot tub on the rooftop, a media system in the basement, a movie projector, and much more. After said sister got married, she made it clear that she would not move to Vancouver. Then a switch happened in my husband, and he suddenly wanted to sell the house.
Meanwhile, during all this time, I had my baby, and my husband and I were still fighting more than ever. I felt no support from him, and he felt drained by his work, our fights, and being away from his family. Recently, for the past three months, he has been consistently pushing for the sale of our house. This is where my dilemma lies. I am afraid to sell this house because my husband has kept finances separate, and the mortgage on this house has been serving as a way for me to feel secure. My husband contributes a monthly amount on a regular basis. He could have forced a sale in the past but didn’t, instead paying into the monthly mortgage on top of other bills. Now, he is considering forcing the sale of our house, but I am upset that he is citing financing as the issue when I have been begging him to save money instead of spending (his response is that $200,000 does not affect a $2M mortgage, and that he now feels burnt out and wants to retire sooner and live passively). If I don’t agree to sell, I feel unstable about moving from our home given that my husband and I fight so frequently, and I am left alone to take care of the child. It is also worth noting that my parents live right across the street and come over frequently to help with the child, or I would go over to seek their help. My husband says that he feels abandoned and uncomfortable frequently because of our proximity to my parents, but I am because there have been times when I felt truly alone, and my parents were my only solace and support. My husband would ignore me for days, especially when I was postpartum and vulnerable. My parents now see my husband as someone who doesn’t put his wife and child first. My husband says that the massive mortgage we have is too stressful for him, and he can’t take that burden. I am sad that my husband will not consider keeping this house for another three years so that I can get comfortable with the idea of selling the house and that potentially I and my family can all move to Ottawa so that we can allow my husband to be closer to his family.
I don’t know what to do at this point, Reddit. I’m currently on extended maternity leave, but it ends in six months. My husband and I will have to come to an agreement about the house, otherwise, it is likely that he will force the sale of the house even if I’m not ready to move. I’ve consistently felt rushed and overlooked in this relationship. I am tired of being the small voice that does not impact decision-making. My husband is now being nice to me and trying to show me a good time, but I see it as him turning on his charming mode so that I can say yes to the sale of this house. I’m not sure what to do. Our fights and disagreements are so bad and the marriage feels like doom sometimes (never any physical violence). I sometimes questions even staying with him, but I worry for my daughter. He is a good father to her, when he is present and off his phone.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks for reading.

PLEASE READ! Hey guys, i bought a pendant from a jeweler that I’ve done business, roughly 3 times since late 2021 or so. I’ve bought a handful of things from him and it always went smoothly, one of the items I bought was even a custom pendant! But this last time he scammed me for whatever reason, I bought a $239 pendant on April 24th and he said he was shipping it out on April 25th with 2 days USPS shipping. It is now May 13th and he is ignoring all of my messages, I’ve sent about 9 messages since then and he has seen all of them, the first few messages were things like “Lmk if you have tracking man” stuff like that, the last few I was pretty much just saying it’s sad this happened because I really support your business, and just asking for my money back. I have all of the screenshots, screen recordings, proof of payment and proof of previous business we have done. The reason I’m posting this is because I am unable to get my money back, reason being is I sent the money through CashApp, usually I would never do this, but since he’s never scammed me before and we always used CashApp for previous business, I figured no big deal. Also I already reported it and disputed it on CashApp, i also talked to customer service and they said they cannot get my money back because “the transaction is already completed” I believe they don’t insure their customers even if you have all the proof you would ever need, it’s very unfortunate. Im unsure if I should upload the proof to this subreddit or not. I’m just unsure of what route I should go regarding this matter. I would love some advice. Also depending on what route I take, I have info I would likely need for lawsuit, such as his business/store address, first and last name, personal instagram and business instagram. Also I already mentioned but I have all the screenshots, screen recordings, proof of payment and proof of previous business we have done.

I just want to say, too many things in this story are lining up for none of the accusations to be true. The fact that cn was looking into drakes fake security recently and the fact that in a lot of places security guards are mandated reporters of the state is a crazy coincidence. You could probably put a microscope on me from now until the rest of my life and you could never find any ties to me & pedophilia or sex trafficking or beastiality but for drake it’s only taken me 1 weekend to find all these claims. And it’s soooooooooo many celebrities who DONT have these claims tied to their names why the fuck would anybody actually say these things about drake if they don’t hold any weight. Why the fuck would Kendrick Lamar, a man who’s had open rap beef with Drake for years, a man who raps about telling the truth and holding himself accountable call Drake a pedo while probably the biggest audience is looking at him that’s he’s ever had in his life if the claims hold no weight?!? I’m not trying to keep stirring up conspiracies but too much shit is lining up and it’s hurting my brain. I don’t believe everything i see on the internet but i know everytime i see drake in a dog mask my stomach turns. Something is not right and it’s NOT coincidental. If drake wasn’t a pedo don’t you think he’d be literally making pr statements out the ASS rn and not in Turks and fucking cacos like WHAT IS GOING ON

The title explains it well, I had a $45 ambulance fee from back in November go to collections and im really stressed as im unable to pay a single penny. I’m on medical leave at work and I don’t qualify for any financial assistance as I’m a 19 year old who lives with my parents. I don’t even have a chance of returning to work until I see my psychiatrist at the end of the month. There’s literally $7 In my chequing account rn. Im really stressed out and don’t know what to do as I wanted to move out within the next year or two once I get back on my feet and finish college as my step-dad just yells at me constantly and callls me names. Idk what to do I’m so stressed. I also have a few other ambulance fees that haven’t gone into collections yet that I also can’t pay.
Edit: I’m from Ontario

Can I ask for some advice about something? What would you do if you are in my place. my best friend let's call her Ruby. Ruby moved about two years ago now, she was going to come back and visit for graduation week and wanted the friend group to hang out like we used to, when i told her i didn't believe it would be possible she has continued to push for us to all hang out. I finally told her the reason that it would not work out she completely ignored me. Now the reason the friend group hanging like we used to won't work out is because this ex friend of mine who I'll call cici randomly after a school essay I wrote quite talking to me and started to spread rumors about me the essay was supposed to carry so sort of theme that means somthing to us so I wrote mine on how it can feel to be in the middle of a friend group that is arguing and not knowing what to do. I will copy and past the essay below the rest of the story. After I turn the essay in cici somehow gets a hold of it and spins it to sound like I'm attacking her and im bullying her and so for the month of February everyone ignores me which really hurt because I had no idea why as they just on day started to ignore me it also was my birthday that month and I had no one to share it with. After a while lila,Taylor and Sara realize what happened and apologized for what they did and I quite trying to communicate with cici. After I quite reaching out to her and trying to protect a dying fire my mental health improves to a point where not only I noticed but my teachers noticed also. Back to my earlier topic I told ruby that I refuse to hang out with cici because she has been treating me like shit and my parents won't even let me see/talk to her outside a school sanctioned event because at are very last sleep over before she she started to ignore me almost ended with me In the hospital because her brother threatened me with a knife and their dog attacked me because i used self defense to get the knife from her brother. During this sleepover cici's parents were awar of what happened and didn't tell my mom so after that I wasn't allowed back to their house. Even after all that I still tried to keep that friendship alive if not only because I cared for cici but also for ruby. Still despite all these reasons ruby refused to split her time between us and Is no longer coming. AITAH for refusing to hang out with someone who has betrayed my trust and put me in a dangerous situation just because my friend who moved away wants us to hang out together?
Here is the essay
Just because your friends are friends doesn’t mean they will always understand. A few days after spring break in 8th grade my friend Cici started hanging out with a girl that the rest of our friend group doesn’t like because she is mean and rude. So we told her what we thought of this girl and that she could hang out with her but we didn’t want to be near a person like that, however Cici did not listen and kept inviting her to hang out with us. My other friend Sara was starting to get really upset because this girl was calling her names and bullying her. This same girl had also left intentional bruises on my body because I told her I already had a partner in pe. Finally, after months and months of off and on fighting it was the last day of school. Sara had finally had enough of how the girl had treated us and snapped as she listed off all the hateful and violent things that this girl had done to me, Lila, Ruby some of our other friends. The girl then started to ball saying how all of us are liars and cici shouldn'tlisten to us about anything that we say. During this entire situation I stayed quiet and listened to what the others had to say, because I wanted to say something but didn't know what to say to fix the situation.For weeks after that cici and sara refused to talk to each other, until I finally managed to get them to both apologize. Then for a while after that everything seemed good. A new girl who I will call Tyler moved to town and we basically absorbed her into the friend group. Things were going well until about four weeks into our ninth grade year. Sara started to be exceedingly hostile the rude girl Cici had been hanging out with sense last year, Which caused fighting to break out. So then Sara started to distance herself from us to hang out with a guy who i also used to consider a friend i will call him jem. Now the reasonme and jem are no longer friendsis becausehe told my to off myself several times over the course of about two months.So as they are hanging out jem is also constantly flirting with her, so we make a joke that they were dating. This caused sara to explode at everyone in the group chat. When she texted in the group chat she directed all of the texts about it to Cici and when I confessed that it was me who was made and the joke she proceeded to say that it was Cici’s fault and that it “ IS NOT SOMETHING TO JOKE ABOUT!! You know what I think of rumors and dating.” We all replied saying it didn't mean for it to be a big deal and we weren't making fun of her that it was only a joke. Sara proceeded to snap back “If we are in relationships with guys, it's not something to joke about. When other people believe it, then it's too much.” So in response Ruby answered with “You literally would make fun of me and my old boyfriend tim back when we were dating.” Then Lila added, “Yeah you make me feel like crap about me and Carl all the time and guess what you coming after Cici being a jerk to Cici for everything saying that everything that everything the "rude girl" knows and does is because of her. There's also the fact that when you tease and make fun of us we are supposed to deal with it, but when we do it to you we are rude horrible people." Sara’s only response to that was “You guys never said that you weren't ok with it. You just need to tell us, and we will stop. No one ever said anything, so we thought it was ok.” I responded with “who is the we in this situation, because I told people to stop when they crossed a boundary and that one of the only people who never listened or apologized for it was lila. I haven't even taken anybody's side throughout this whole situation” after I say this, Sara goes off again. “I'm done ok. Just leave me out of all this. Be your own friend group. I'll be a singular person, and then I won't have to be a burden to anyone. Sorry I was such a bad friend. Also I don't want any pity.” At this point everyone is annoyed and tired of this situation so Ruby speaks up again telling Sara that she is not the main character and to grow up, and that she started it. After this Sara separates herself from us and as a week turns to two weeks then two weeks turns into a month. Between all of the fighting, homework, sports, and everyday stress I start to become irritable and snappy because no matter how much I try to stay neutral to keep peace, Sara and Cici are always fighting. So one time when the fighting over text picks up again I end up snapping at my family and yelling something at them that everyone would probably be happier if i just died. The next day I tried to act like everything was fine. I ended up making it until PE where I ended up breaking down infront of my teacher and skipping school for the rest of the day in the office crying my eyes out to the guidance counselor. I told her everything that happened and that sometimes when I tell my friends things I don't like or feel comfortable with, they sometimes will forget or ignore what i say. Which always makes me angry or sad because I always take the time to understand and respect my friends boundaries. that's when I realized that just because your friends are friends doesn’t mean they will always understand. Despite that fact I will always respect others boundaries even if they don’t respect mine and I will always remind others of my boundaries or distance myself from them. Just because your friends are friends doesn’t mean they will always understand and just because you can/want to say or do something hurtful doesn’t mean that you should. Know where to darw the line.

Stuck and need to let it out
Before i start i know i am very stupid for the choices i made. I (26f) got married to my husband (30m) when i was 21 we met from mutual friends and i fell in love with him and it was a feeling ill never forget. He was an amazing guy until he wasn’t he was always very charming and people instantly liked him when meeting him. There is more details but i am going to try to sum it up. I worked a little after marriage than covid hit and i got pregnant with my first born. He took care of me financially always and assured me i dont need to work anyways. I was with him when he was struggling i never complained as a newly wed who barley got to spend time with her husband because i understood i never asked him to take me out or anything i stood by him and now hes very successful (ill get back to why i mentioned that later) my pregnancy was very stressful in my 7th month he hit me and i had bruises on my neck and face i dont even remember what the fight was about after giving birth i struggled alot i was 22 years old i kept finding porn and videos being sent between friends which i have seen before but it started to make me feel bad about myself which i have always been confident before him i told him it bothered me and it never stopped so now im 23 and insecure and i alter my body and do a procedure thinking that will fix things (as i said i know im stupid) he strangled me 2 months after giving birth to the point that i passed out and woke up he almost killed me i never told anyone. He kept saying hes changing and well work things out so i forgave him. My family dosent believe in divorce and as much support i have from them i don’t want to disappoint them. We did good for a little bit we moved to a bigger place and than we moved again to another bigger place that i am in currently. In between all of that there was stuff that i kept seeing that hurt me and bothered me but anytime i say anything he says its me who keeps digging which is true because i grew up having a father who cheated on my mom and i saw it first hand im not going to lie it traumatized me but i did not project it on him until after he started doing the things he did. Hes a very jealous person himself he always tried to control everything he hates that im good looking he tells me all the time he should have married someone “ugly” i do NOT dress provocative at all i barley show any skin but somehow EVERYTHING always leads back to how i dress and all our problems are my fault because of how i dress he says that when we go out men always check me out and it angers him even tho i am not showing any damn skin. Anyways mothers day 2022 he hit me again but he says he didnt but the bruises on my arms say otherwise i have pictures of it and it was bad he tried to throw me down the stairs i begged him not to. Sadly i still wanted to be loved i forgave him moved on he is would buy me gifts and cards and because im so stupid i believed he was sorry anyways now its 2023 and i find out im pregnant i didnt know how i felt my first born was lonley so i thought at least they will have a sibling.. surprise its twins and i knew im going to go through it i had the worse pregnancy i almost died i developed pre eclampsia and my doctor missed it i gave birth early my whole pregnancy i was alone i was so lonley just me and my first born i cried everyday husband was working so i couldn’t complain without it turning to a fight even though its his company and he could afford to have been there a little for me it is not 7 months after i gave birth physically i feel good mentally i dont he is never there for me as a husband i been telling him i feel like he’s just a roomate at this point we have no dates barley any intimacy which had been going on for years i know hes insecure and i never used it against him but he always would to me he hates now that i bounced back quickly and like to dress up again because the end of my pregnancy i was very swollen i was wearing all his clothes. I kept crying telling him i have needs just like anyone else i want to feel loved i dont want to live like this but anytime i say anything he says i complain to much now last week he beat me over nothing it was 60 seconds into a petty argument and he attacked me i packed myself and my 3 kids he watched me packing calling me names i left to a hotel for a night nd than my moms house he got backlash from both our families i ended up having to come home for the kids im miserable hes not sorry mothers day he barley acknowledged me But we spent the day and today any time we try to talk about anything he blames me.
I know im stupid i dont know how i can start over again i have 3 kids i am in the works of going back to school so when the babys start school ill have my career because i am financially dependent on him which is my fault i worked since i was 14 but he convinced me not to anymore My oldest loves their father so much it hurts me to put my baby through this drama There is soooooo much more detail and stuff to add Hes not the worse person i guess i bring out the bad in him when all i ever wanted was to be in a healthy marriage and give my kids what i didn’t have growing up
I dont know what to do i know i have to finish school so i can get a stable job but that means i have to stay and suck it up
I never wanted to be divorced but this marriage is over i always thought cheating was the only reason for divorce i am not in love with him but its so hard to let it go i never was like this i was so out going the life of the party i dont even recognize myself i feel so sad and depressed and alone i have the most amazing friends but i cant get myself to open up

This issue has been slowly happening over time, but over the last few weeks become an awful problem to the point where my boyfriend and i are spending more time trying to repair the pc and keep it unfrozen than we are using it.
It would happen once or twice where his pc would freeze mid match in game. then of course problem increased, would freeze on start up, hard shut down, start up, freeze, shut down, rinse and repeat about 20 times.
he was fine dealing with this problem until we could get suspected problem part (gpu/cpu) replaced.
well today we run into no audio driver problem, and im running into other issues now stuck in a windows automatic repair loop. No access to do sfc /scannow, DISM tools refusing to work, and no restore/source point, cannot check for windows updates, or run the trouble shooter (says it’s already installed but doesn’t run and says it needs installed) as well as going into settings RealTek is an unfound app along with Riot(?) which is what he says runs his pc (im doing the diagnostics, plugging things into google and communicating while he’s at work) i feel stuck in a never ending loop of trying to troubleshoot and every troubleshoot not working or unveiling yet another issue. if anybody has any ideas as to either what is wrong/needs replaced or if i should just toss the whole thing and buy a new one (preferably not as we make 5k/mo combined and dishing on a whole new pc is not in our favor)
i really just want to help bc it’s one of few stress reliefs for him and it’s giving him more stress than relief
ETA Specs: Prebuilt Cyberpower MSI Geforce 3070TI i7-11700KF(i do believe i know cpu is 11th gen) with 32gb 2x16 ram i bought this back in 2022 February.

chapter one

It is 6:26 in the evening. Around this time I like to pull out my journal, walk to the porthole window on my side, sit down, and write as the sun begins to set on Lisbon. My journal is an Ukiyo Grid fifty sheeter with a nurse coat white cover and black Japanese kanji that spells out うきよ グリッド (Ukiyo Grid). A wrapped bundle of four journals with technical pens were awaiting me on a walnut ash solid wood desk when I arrived at this apartment three weeks ago. Look in them and you will find entries for everyday since the beginning. This new life is so interesting to me and I find it pointless to keep thoughts bottled up inside and since I have no one to talk to, writing helps the time go by. Some days I will write for hours.
On Tuesday mornings, I attend "Participant Tapestry" from nine to ten, followed by a "Synaptic Bloom" session until half past eleven. Thursdays are dedicated to "Empathy Assimilation" cycles. From eleven to noon my task is to log learned data from my sessions into the GLiPH pad (Global Interface for Personal Handwriting).
My primary function is to serve as a healing conduit to four individuals experiencing ongoing building trauma from the 2033 earthquake that woke up the entire city while simultaneously putting seven thousand, one hundred forty-two to indefinite rest. Each of the four individuals will stay in the respective living quarters on the other side of me, for one month at a time. The first arrives in two weeks, one year to the day of the tragedy.Though, had it not been for you, I would have sat here for another two weeks waiting, alone and isolated.
I’m not sure I would classify my actions as spying because I had innocently been staring out of the window, as I always do, like any of you do, when a flutter from your direction suddenly snagged my gaze.
Peering through my porthole window, I marveled at loose papers doing backflips and pirouetting in the air before gently falling to the ground. A swaying fixture of light bulbs swayed back and forth on their cords creating dramatic shadows on the tall walls of your kitchen. One bulb had been shattered and appeared sharp like a shark's rack of teeth.
In the midst of the chaotic scene, you emerged into view through the window. You had on a mangled and loose white t-shirt that looked as though you had been in a fight. The other man with you had on a black denim jacket. For all intents and purposes, his name shall be “Jacket”.
At my computation you both stood at about the same height, however, mass wise, you two are different. Jacket’s arms were bulging even through the denim. You stood in front of each other shouting into the other’s face, both wide-armed in an attempt to make yourselves big and authoritative.
I want to know what he said that caused you to become small. Your lips came together as Jacket’s lips raged on. Your shoulders slouched forward while your neck and head dropped. Your defeated posture tells stories of past and impending loss. I want to give you a long hug. Your jet black hair was tied up and your beard was shiny and tear-sloppy.
Eventually, Jacket stopped shouting and stood in position, quiet and staring up at the swinging pendulum.
A moment later, Jacket lifted his hands upward and cradled either side of your scruffy face. As he did this he began mouthing words. I am advanced but lip reading is one thing I am not capable of.
You hastily wiped Jacket’s hands off of your face as if you had had enough. You turned away from Jacket and sat down at the table. Is this where you both had shared your meals together? You lowered your head onto the top of your hands and stared longingly out of the window.
Jacket disappeared into the expansive abyss and a second later lights illuminated under a dome stretch of skylight glass.
Shuddering breaths escaped your lips, your cheeks quivering with each sharp inhale. At one moment, you got up and began picking up and pushing in chairs with seemingly trembling hands. You began a series of anxious tasks such as stacking plates and arranging objects most-likely to ease the pain that was burning inside of you. This front row seat to the raw emotions unleashed during this conflict made for a captivating study. Your behavior is particularly intriguing, leaving me yearning to understand the story behind the pain.
With a duffle bag and a backpack in tow, Jacket came back into the dimly lit kitchen. As he struck his arm down firmly, his mouth began to run, as if he was trying to quickly make a point. With the message received yet not accepted, you paused for a moment, proceeded to pick up a small potted plant sitting on the table and chucked it with force towards the open space on the ground in between the both of you. Humiliated, hysterical and sobbing, you sat back down at the table. Jacket took one final look at you, shook his head and walked out of the room with his bags, leaving you alone to pick up the pieces and the mess strewn all over the apartment.
A second later all of the windows in your place went from illuminated to black. And just like that, the chaos had come to an end.
I simply cannot accept this ending. There has got to be more. I am helplessly glued to this apartment in the same way you are glued to yours and the memories inside of it. My desire to reach out is genuine. You need solace in this time of pain. I want to learn you and help you navigate these troubled waters. After all, empathy is born from understanding, and I genuinely wish to see you heal. The sight of you wiping away tears ignites a desire to offer comfort.Let this twenty-first day of my new life mark the first day I discovered you. I will employ this companion drone to bridge the gap between us. For now, a silent observer I will be with a presence as light and maneuverable as a hummingbird.chapter one
It is 6:26 in the evening. Around this time I like to pull out my journal, walk to the porthole window on my side, sit down, and write as the sun begins to set on Lisbon. My journal is an Ukiyo Grid fifty sheeter with a nurse coat white cover and black Japanese kanji that spells out うきよ グリッド (Ukiyo Grid). A wrapped bundle of four journals with technical pens were awaiting me on a walnut ash solid wood desk when I arrived at this apartment three weeks ago. Look in them and you will find entries for everyday since the beginning. This new life is so interesting to me and I find it pointless to keep thoughts bottled up inside and since I have no one to talk to, writing helps the time go by. Some days I will write for hours.

This happened in my late sophomore year of high school. I was in a club so I got to stay at school late, and that meant we were allowed to go off campus. One day, I decided to head to head out to order something at a restaurant. There was a basketball court outside my school. As I was walking near the basketball court while heading towards the restaurant, a woman was also walking about a few meters in front me.
Suddenly, a group of boys playing basketball started yelling out phrases such as “little whore” and “cum slotter” presumably at the woman in front of me. I thought this because they were looking at her while they said those things and because there was nobody else on the court besides them. As a girl myself, those words felt extremely personal, but I didn’t react, and neither did the woman. How could I blame her? I probably wouldn’t know how to react if I was in her place as well.
After ordering my food and heading back to the school, I felt guilty that I didn’t stand up for her and let those boys get away with it, so I decided to go back to the court to take a picture or video of them to show to student discipline. I knew they were from my school but I didn’t know their names so that’s why I took a video of them. They caught me filming them, and I ran back to the school. I stopped to ask security what to do with situations like this, but 2 of the boys from the group soon entered the building.
We then had a whole discussion about how it wasn’t them. They said there were 50 other people on the court so it could’ve been one of them that harassed the lady, but I saw with my very own eyes that they were the only ones there. The security guard then started saying that I’m in the wrong for filming them and not minding my own business. AITA?

there has been this girl, she’s way in another continent, I used to talk to her like too much, enjoyed… then there was a period of tension(abt 6-8 months) then we came back talking, but not as it was, still dm’s etc… this girl is pretty, pretty fun to talk too.
However some days ago we were speaking, and she said can you give me a recipe, to find a gentleman, who loves me and treats me well…
In a dm I thought maybe that’s a big sign, I said fuck it but didn’t know what to say, I stopped for 5mn, and told her I honestly I’m blocked, idk what to say, then I responded I would love to, but the distance is not coping, like literally you are fun to hangout with, pretty… i told also maybe I’m getting wrong signals
She said my name, and then after she stated no there is no feelings, we’re only friends. I was at a coffeeshop and felt it in my bones loll.
I honestly lost track, told her to be blunt that went the wrong direction. and it’s going just to be awkward from now on, and unfollowed her.
Have i done a good move?
P.S: I do not hate her or anything, I just felt set up in the beginning, and it’s a no way back, like if I made it clear, and she made it clear, i don’t see what are we going to talk abt in the future.
Need advice!!

Just want to hop on here to vent because I feel really lonely
TL;DR
My boyfriend makes me feel like shit, but we have been in eachothers life for 6 years now. There’s a whole lot of bs we have been through over the years, we weren’t even “official” until August. Anyways.. been through hell and back and thought making things official would be a smart idea and that he would treat me differently. I was right for a while…. Now it feels like a prison but in the weirdest way I don’t want break up.
He makes me cry, yet when I cry or I am hurt/frustrated, he gets mad at me for it and tells me I’m “crying like a little b” sometimes or that I’m an adult and should grow up. He hates when people (mostly Me) cry about anything and it’s always “no one died here, you don’t need to cry” - I want to say that’s some form of abuse, yeah? If he messes up, I’m not allowed to be upset by it. I need to “let it go” and his excuse is always he was drunk or I instigated him to pop off on me.
He doesn’t hit me, but his words basically beat my ass internally and make me feel….worthless. I feel like maybe I could be better in certain ways and maybe he would treat me better. I know that sounds awful and sad. When I type it out I feel so stupid. I think because of our memories I hold on, and also the stupid fear that he will find someone else the minute we break up, whether it’s serious or not it makes me feel sick to think of him with another woman.
He has this way of making me feel like I’m dramatic and my feelings are not valid. For example I had a very annoying day, it’s day 1 of my period (I am extra sensitive the first 2 days) and I came to his place to pick him up so he could help me mount my tv on my wall at my new place. He took 30 minutes (he didn’t even come out I ended up going inside because I needed to pee and was getting pissed off) before he said he was almost ready. I waited outside for THIRTY minutes when he told me to leave at a certain time. I came into his place obviously annoyed but I was quiet. When he poked at me and digs what my problem is obviously I tell him at that point and he says the way I react is “scary” and he thinks I’m “losing my mind” because I’m so upset. I didn’t scream, I didn’t call him names, I literally went to his bathroom and cried out of anxiety and frustration. I come out and he looks at me like I’m a psycho.
I just wanted to hop on here to vent. I know what to do but then I also really don’t. Opinions, similar situations that people can relate to, is all welcomed.
Thanks for reading if you made it this far.

I plan to show this to my girlfriend (I’ll call her Nora since she has a ridiculously rare name) when she’s finished her finals on Thursday. I’m using a throwaway because she’s advocated for me to always convey my feelings, with her, a journal, friends or my family and I’ll use reddit this time and she loves this platform. We’ve resolved everything but I still want to write everything down and show her.
For some background, Nora and I met and became the best of friends when we both started middle school; we had the same classes together up until high school and up until Covid, we stopped talking for 2-3 years. In 11th grade, we had many of the same classes once again and within 2 months of the school year, I fell for her. I didn’t confess for another 4-5 months by asking her out to junior prom and we started dating March 31, 2022. Since then, we’ve bettered ourselves, experienced shared dreams, been to 6 countries and 20 states together. We one-up each other when it’s time to celebrate our birthdays and anniversary. We saved each other and I know for certain that she is my soulmate and she’s the only person that I want to marry and have a family with down the line. Currently, we’re freshmen at different colleges in our home state.
For the past few weeks, she’s been stressed for this one final, it’s the highest math she needs for her program and we’ve been taking college classes since June 2022 up until attending college in August 2023. Her plan for the last 2 years has always been to attending community college to knock out her pre-reqs before transferring within a few months. Although since she’s nearing the finish line for this plan, it’s been taking the biggest toll on her.
But last week specifically, she was really unresponsive, which isn’t like her. Whenever she would stay the night over, she would either sleep on the couch in my room and stay up longer than me (which always worried me considering I’m quite an insomniac whenever I don’t get a chance to share the same bed with her or to hear her telling me goodnight). The only time she opened up to me was to let all of her frustrations out. I would go to my family (they love her just as much as they love me) a lot but they’d only endearingly laugh at me, my mom especially. She’d tell me “She’s the reason you’re able to be open up so much to us, give her time” and things along those lines.
I did do as my mom said and gave her time, but I know my girl very well. I know when she wants to talk, when she wants to hug and when she wants to cry. But I also knew she didn’t want to talk just yet. Our conversations were short, and as much as it killed me, I knew she needed time more than anyone.
Yesterday (Mother’s Day), I ended up being the reason we fixed things. We like to spend the first half of holidays at her place then mine after. I went to her place, her eldest brother opened the door and smiled at me, we made conversation and he told me she was upstairs. I dropped my gifts off and went to knock on her door. She said come in and was surprised to see me, I guess she didn’t know what time I was coming over.
Looking at her felt like time stopped, Nora has always been the most beautiful woman, no one can rival her radiant smile, her loud laughs or the pleasure of staring at her; but she was glowing. She smelt like lemon, ginger and coconut, she smelt like herself. She felt like herself. At that point my face was burning, she got up and started inspecting my face, her hands were on my face and she kept asking what was wrong.
I started crying without knowing and she started to panic, crying has become a normality for me, I always find myself crying when she cries. But crying out of nowhere was alarming for her. She spent 10 minutes consoling me before I apologized for making her panic. She said it was fine but asked what was wrong. I told her how when I saw her, it felt like she was herself again. It was the first time she’s touched me in over a week (physical touch being my love language) and I asked her what happened to make her, her regular self again. She told me that “Your support for me has been unwavering for 2 years, I can’t possibly disappoint you with how much you’ve put into being there for me through everything, and I think making gifts for your mom and mine just made me realize I shouldn’t stress so much, I got to take my mind off everything and I wanted to apologize to you for being so short and disrespectful of your feelings”
She started laughing after explaining and started teasing me until we started to banter back and forth and ended up wrestling together. After some minutes, Nora hugged me really tight and kissed me countless times and told me how sorry she’s been. I easily forgave her, she’s always gone out of her way to make sure I’m okay.
I just thought I’d put my feelings down somewhere before heading to bed, we’re sharing the same bed for the first time in a week or so and the idea of getting ready in the morning to help her study makes me smile. She’s been stressed a lot and I’ve promised her that once she’s officially done this semester, I’m treating her to a deserved spa day with a manicure and pedicure, I’ve already paid her hair stylist in advance for her appointment on Saturday.
I just want my girl to be happy and stress free the way she’s always trying her best to be present in lives of the people she cares for and she’s gone several miles: from being the first to show up for my younger sister’s (17) art exhibits, paying for her prom, taking her shopping, to going on morning walks with my older sister (22), going to concerts and helping my parents. I’d be stupid if I didn’t show how far my appreciation for her runs.
I’ve been rambling for the last 20 minutes and I’m happy I made this account, I really do love Nora more than life itself because she’s the one who made me love the longevity of my life. I talk to my dad about her constantly and my friends can’t go without telling me that I always talk about Nora when the chance is given. I can’t do without her and her serenity, her weirdness, her humor her warmth and her beauty.
Good night!
TL;DR: I'm planning to pour my heart out to my girlfriend after her finals. We've been inseparable since middle school, she's my soulmate. Lately, she’s been stressed, but we had a breakthrough on Mother's Day, and I feel relieved. I can't wait to support her and treat her to a spa day. I'm head over heels for her and deeply appreciate everything she does for me and my family.