Hi guys, I would like to open a discussion on when exactly a customer starts being a Karen. Because honestly, I feel that sometimes even if you are labeled as one it’s okay!
For context of where these thoughts are coming from, a few days ago my baby (M 5m) and I (F 29y) stop by the pharmacy on our way home from a long walk (we are located in Italy btw)
I’m wearing a pair of sporty high waisted trousers and a sports crop top from a Pilates set, nothing fancy, but a tiny bit of the upper part of my stomach is showing.
The pharmacist, as soon as I reach checkout and approach her, without even replying to my greeting, proceeds to criticize my outfit, saying exactly that I need to put a shirt on when entering the pharmacy because we are not on the beach (we are literally 500 mts from a beach but go on), but for this time she will LET IT SLIDE. I get so appalled at first that I don’t even know what to say, apart from saying that this is a top, not a bra nor a bikini top, but she repeats herself saying I can’t go around showing off my stomach.
10 minutes later I go back to return the item as this wasn’t sitting right with me and when I do the return with the same pharmacist I politely say to her that I didn’t like how I was treated and if the pharmacy has this request for their customers they should put a sign at the door (you know, same signs as when dogs are not allowed and stuff), not say it with such rudeness at checkout. She than snaps at me proceeding to let me know how this is common knowledge and respect for the society we live in and how I’m disrespectful and ill-mannered and stuff. I walk out to her rant, when she starting to raise her voice enough for people to start noticing and catching up on what’s going on.
As someone who is always in doubt if I’m wrong, especially for the fear of becoming a Karen, I later confirmed with my cousins wife who is also the pharmacist, that this behavior was not ok and absolutely unprofessional. She said people come to her in a bikini and see-through dress and she NEVER EVER thought of criticizing and saying something, it’s not her place to do it, people can wear what they want.
I now am planning a petty revenge on that, but stil wondering what the hell… I mean, we live in a world where women belittle and insult and shame other women for a little bit of skin? It felt like I was entering a church, not a fucking STORE!
Where is that line that transforms you from someone who just stands up for their rights and basic human respect becomes a Karen? I feel first people who worked retail where the one cornered, not being able to defend themselves… but now the tables turned completely and it’s the customer who at any moment when being attacked or mistreated can become a Karen and made fun of…
What you guys think?
To Charlotte: thank for you content, I got my partner hooked up as well as my 4 months old son, we love watching your channel ❤️

Hello eveyone! Recently I had an experience and I would like your opinions.
To begin with, I was born and raised in Greece, my father is an Atheist , from an orthodox backround and my mother comes from a bektashi backround, but she seems to believe there is one God and people have divided into religions. As a result she goes to churches here and prays whenever she feels like it.
Growing up I had rejected God and I was a firm atheist. Howerer last years I have a feeling that God might be calling me, but I did everything I could to ignore it.
And now to the important stuff. Last month I visited Italy, Bologna, Padova and Venice to be exact. When I was there I visited many churches because I really like the religious art. When in Padova I visited a beautiful church that has a Jesus on the cross made by Donatello , Santa Maria dei servi. I was looking at this statue and I saw for the first time the little round candles Catholics use.(In Greece we use regular tall-thin candles). So I gave some change and I also lit one.. Then I thought almost jokingly, if there is God give me a sign. I then walked a bit further for a minute into the church and then I walked back. Thats when I was stunned, the guy that was working in the church had gathered all the candles except mine, even though when I lit it he was not around. The feeling I felt then cannot be described, and I held back some tears. I really believe that thats the sign I asked for and since then I cannot stop thinking about it. I tried to logically explain it, but if God would give someone a sign, i really believe that it would be something like this, one shouldn't expect angels coming down singing or something. And now I don't know what to do. I was thinking of attending a catholic church here in Athens, one of the few we have, and see where it goes from there. How should i go about this? Did I overreact?

So my story goes I had a friend for two years who lived next door. We had feelings for each other and she’d come and hang out with me most of the week after work or other projects. She dated someone and I took back my feelings and he came to live at the house and we remain friends for that year,
after they broke up, she came back to my world and spend more time with me and then at some moment she began to undress and sit patiently next to me as we explored a bit of foreplay.
I asked her. I’d like to kiss her and she accepted and we made very passionate love that night , in the following days we juggle between friendship and feelings and then over the three months we got quite close but she was leaving to go to another country and in that time she was arranged to meet someone who they’ve been having conversation over the phone,
a little bit confused I continue to engage with this woman who is my friend who we had a very understanding Connection and clear communication or should I step away?
There was a few signs that gave me that possibility that she was either not feeling anything or it was just platonic However on our way down before I said I would take it to the airport.
We spent more time together. I met her family and we journey closer again in the feelings of making love and exchanging words. now we never had been in a relationship status more situationship knowing that she was going to Costa Rica , and possibly going to meet someone else there as she was going away for six months she left her stuff in my house and she said that she would not see anyone when she’s there.
I kinda did not believe that but I had to accept as I was giving her a lot of my attention more than she was giving me. I started to sense and perhaps maybe I’m just being used and that her previous partner who I knew well also felt this with her and she was not being honest.
When that came she was feeling nervous and I asked her. Why are you feeling nervous? She said it’s because I am falling in love with you and I can’t do that.
I need to go away and don’t want to make this difficult for myself then I mentioned what about those other times she mentioned? Why do you think I was pulling away? It’s because I did not want to get attached and I did not want you to get attached because I’m going to Costa Rica
she made that very clear and that she wanted us to enjoy our time but keep it in a level of friendship.
I accepted but as she left I grew a deeper feelings and I was growing deep in the language of love using our pet names that we gave for each other , I wondered why however she never asked me to come to Costa Rica. I was capable of doing so I started to think. Maybe the other man was also the back of her mind and she had a possible connection with him over the conversations they had
providing her with a safe note to somewhere to stay as well as more financially secure than me two months later I sent her a call telling her I missed her.
I loved her and she replied. Hello Friend I have met someone now and and what turned into a friendship is blossoming into something more and now we are journey together love and light.
In that moment I had a freak out and mentioned to her well. Why didn’t you tell me it Was growing into something more weeks before why now …,
Her reply was because we were not boyfriend. girlfriend
She didn’t feel like she had to tell me anything about this man
I was well. We were just together for the last few months plus we were exchanging on the phone.
I don’t mind that you met someone but I don’t feel you really let me know in a thoughtful way for I had feelings she replied. I respect you had feelings
I was taken back by her wording as I was not really feeling the connection that we had before and the communication was poor and she always said she valued communication deeply. I felt like she was not been living up to that word so I text her again telling her well I don’t feel like you have communicated very clearly and almost feel like you’ve shut that down
Again she replied and her perspective. She did communicate Cleary in the beginning that she just wanted to be friends valued or friendship and and not meant to be hurtful. And that was it from there.
the classic response
I did the silly approach by Textung her. I loved her and all that jazz I realise there’s not much more I could do so I blocked her and removed her from Instagram and she was upset saying why did I do that? I told her because I don’t want to see someone I cared about in love being with someone else in the texting and so On it will suck .
just clearly putting up some of my boundaries she felt a little bit upset that I could not see this as a friendship and asked if she would take her things. I replied. You’re welcome to keep her things here and we’ll see each other later throughout the life enjoy your timing Costa Rica have fun and be well and I will see you again I’m sure and things have gone quiet.
Unfortunately I went on her Instagram to reconnect with her and I saw the love exchange with another man and from that point I’ve been working on myself trying to realise that perhaps there could be something more for us in the future or just to walk away from this ,
because it is a difficult situation for me right now seeing them in a romantic situation together or imagining them being together and myself struggling in a space where was spending a lot of time with her so what should I do in this situation? Should I just keep it as friendship and keep it open for possibility in the future if she takes comes back or do I just step away and just move on with my life and not worry too much about it and just remain friends?
It’s a bit confusing because I do feel quite deep for her and it’s quite upsetting that she doesn’t feel the same way at least I don’t feel she does cause she’s in Costa Rica having fun great job and she’s met someone fresh
part of me that the relationship was a rebound and the reason she didn’t want to go deeper within this type of relationship is that she may have felt she needed this time and place to go to Costa Rica just to let go of her story that was quite hurtful for her here and I also remind her of that story .due to the location I live ..
it’s been a month now and she did not text me

So, I was having fun at the casino. I was playing a game called Rich Little Piggies. There were two of these games in the casino. There was a guy playing the one next to me. He kept asking his girlfriend to hold his game while he went to get more money to play. He did this three times. After the third time, they both left with no credits left in the game. They didn't even turn or lean the chair against the machine.
I'm a fair player. If a chair is turned or leaned, I don't touch the game. So, I decided to try the game out because the one I was playing wasn't paying out much. About ten minutes into playing, the guy comes back and starts yelling at me for playing the game he had put lots of money into.
I told him that they both left without any sign of coming back, and since he'd been gone for a while, it wasn't my fault. I kept playing while he stood there being rude. The best part was, I hit the triple bonus and won around $500 (playing with 2-cent credits). He was really mad and left after I said I'd call security if he didn't stop bothering me. He left after calling me a few names.

62F. This has happened twice now, once last summer and again a week ago. Literally just leaned over (from a standing position), slowly not suddenly, ever so slightly twisted to the left, reaching out my left hand to pull a weed in my yard and BANG! Sudden severe pain under my left breast, a little lower than bottom of sternum, enough pain to make me yelp out loud and nearly start crying. It lasted only a few seconds but that spot has been sore and tender for ten days, hurts to take a deep breath or stretch (which, having had broken ribs in the past, I'm gently doing anyway to keep things from seizing up.) Finally gave up and went in for an xray today which (of course) showed nothing wrong. Same exact thing last summer except on the right side. I've had subluxed ribs which always cause back/shoulder blade pain but that's not what this was. It was almost like the inner costal tips of my ribs slipped over each other? I'm wondering if anyone else has experienced this. An ultrasound last summer did show some calcified cartilage, so maybe it's that...

Xuefeng
First of all, we have to admit that the Bible is the accomplishment of the Ephraim which loyally records the Jewish history, explains the relationship between the God, Devil and human beings to the furthest degree, and gives the direction the human beings should take.
The Bible, the Koran, the Buddhist Scripture and the Tao Te Ching are the eternal and effective treasures and collections of human wisdom, teaching us how to behave and develop into the higher level of life space.
“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth”. The first sentence in the Bible did tell the truth. But the things covered by the cossack may not be the holly things. And the people wearing the sacred cassock may not be the abbot.
The problem with the Bible is that the God it introduces is not the genuine Greatest Creator.
We have known that the Greatest Creator has the 8 features. The Greatest Creator is unique and exclusive, amorphous, neutral, mysterious, impartial, merciful, supremely powerful and intelligent. The wisdom of the Greatest Creator is revealed through its creation of universe order, designing of LIFE program and knowing of the past and the future.
Then, does the God in the Bible have the above-mentioned 8 features?
Let’s explain this with examples.
The Betrayal of Adam and Eve
According to the Genesis, Adam and Eve were instigated to eat the fruit on the Wisdom Tree forbidden by the God in the Bible. Because they have violated the order of the God (in the Bible), they were repelled out of the Eden.
It indicates that the God in the Bible is a. incompetent; b. improvident; and c. unjust.
He is incompetent because he was a loser at the beginning. The first couple of human he created betrayed him. So can we still say it is supremely powerful?
Can we still believe in a “person” who often loses? The Great Flood had killed most of the human beings. What happened to them afterwards? They still wouldn’t listen to his words. The Moses Ten Commandments are actually the directives of the God in the Bible. Can you tell me how many of them are obeyed by the human being? Actually not even one. The God in the Bible seemed to know nothing about how to control the human beings. The only measure it takes is to voice warnings and threats against the human beings. Thousands of years has passed, the human beings remain the same. Is there no means to control the human beings? Or is there some other force constraining this Almighty God? If this is the case, is this God not sole or exclusive? For thousands of years, the human beings have been violating hisorder. What is he waiting for?
The God in the Bible is improvident because he didn’t know that Adam and Eve were going to betray him or the development trend of what he had created. Is this God, who is not able to predict the future or the past, still reliable? If the Earth is going to get out of the Solar System and this God knows nothing about it, how can he save the human beings? How can this GOD administer the deities, Buddha, celestial beings and Devils when he found it difficult to control the human beings? How can he manage the spacious Universe?
The God in the Bible is unjust because it cannot tell wrong from the right and because it is unreasonable.
Why would Adam and Eve betray the God in the Bible? There are three major reasons. First, the genetic structure of Adam and Eve had faults, or was imperfect. The life created by this God was now its own constraint. This angered the God very much. It is just like the house built by an architect who put every efforts was fallen and hit his own feet. Is the house or the architect that should be blamed?
The second reason they betrayed is that they were instigated and seduced by the snake. Adam and Eve are humans while behind the snake was the Devil Satan. The energy and wisdom of human beings can’t match those of the Devil. This God didn’t punish the Devil Satan. Instead, it imposed inflictions on Adam and Eve and drove them out of Eden. Is it fair? If a rapist raped an 8-year-old girl, would it be fair to blame the girl for her sexual organ and weakness instead of bringing justice to the rapist?
The third reason of betrayal, which is also the most important one, is the damned Wisdom Tree that can tell the good and evil. Who has planted it in the Eden and why? It’s just like putting a poisonous sweet on the dinner table for the kids. Or it’s like playing the porn video for the young girls while teaching them to retain their innocence. Would a moral person do such a thing? Isn’t this “person” who planted the Wisdom Tree in the Eden has caused the betrayal of Adam and Eve?
Besides, does this God, who had created Adam and Eve, has other measures to take rather than driving Adam and Eve out of the Eden? Is it fair not to give them a second chance simply because they have made only one mistake? Does one mistake justify their life-long sins?
Jesus came to the Mortal World to atone for the human beings’ sins. According to the Bible, all the people have their “original sin”. Where does the “original sin” come from? Actually, they are inherited from Adam and Eve, the ancestors of human beings, whose sins were formed because they had eaten the fruit on the damned Wisdom Tree.
When we are born, we have the “original sin” inherited from Adam and Eve. The “cross” on our back was much too heavy. According to this logic, “the son of a thief is always a thief”, “the son of a criminal is always a criminal”, and “the son of an emperor is always an emperor”. That’s why in ancient China, in the feudal period in particular, “If a man committed crime, all his family members would be sentenced to death”, or “If a man attained the Tao, even his pets ascended to Heaven”. This also explains why the thrones can only be passed on to the next generations of royal families. This is because it complies with the logic in the Bible.
If somebody has sins, the God in the Bible and the Satan sined first. Is it humanitarian to inflict on billions of humans throughout the history simply because of the wrongdoings of Adam and Eve? Why not executing Adam and Eve and creating a new pair of humans at the time? Is creating a new couple so difficult for the God in the Bible?
All the people are born with sins. This is why each of us comes to the Mortal World to endure the sufferings. But the sins are not inherited from our ancestors. They are made by oursleves in the previous cycle of life. If we don’t have sins, we would all have become Buddha or celestial beings.
Ten Plagues of Egypt
According to the Exodus, when Moses and Aaron, in the capacity of the GOD in the Bible, asked the Egyptian Pharaoh to let the Israelis leave Egypt, they were refused. Consequently, the GOD in the Bible imposed 10 plagues on Egypt. 1. Plague of Blood The water of the Nile will be changed into blood. The fish in the Nile will die, and the river will stink; the Egyptians will not be able to drink its water. 2. Plague of Frogs. The Nile will teem with frogs. They will come up into your palace and your bedroom and onto your bed, into the houses of your officials and on your people, and into your ovens and kneading troughs. The frogs will go up on you and your people and all your officials. 3. Plague of Lice.The dust of the ground became lice, lice came upon men and animals. All the dust throughout the land of Egypt became lice. 4. Plague of Flies The houses of the Egyptians will be full of flies, and even the ground where they are. 5. Plague of Livestock Death The fifth plague of Egypt was an epidemic disease which exterminated the Egyptian livestock; that is, horses, donkeys, camels, cattle, sheep and goats; 6. Plague of Boils The sixth plague of Egypt was Shkhin. The Shkhin was a kind of skin disease, usually translated as "boils".; 7. Plague of Hail The seventh plague of Egypt was a destructive storm; 8. Plague of Locusts Locusts will devour what little you have left after the hail, including every tree that is growing in your fields.; 9. Plague of Darkness Total darkness covered all Egypt for three days 10. Death of the Firstborn The tenth and final plague of Egypt was the death of all first born in Egypt — no one escaped, from the lowest servant to Pharaoh's own first-born son, including first-born of livestock.
It is understandable that the God punished Egypt because Egyptian Pharaoh wouldn’t obey his order. However, it was unreasonable and went too far to kill the first-born of all humans and animals in Egypt. You can punish the Egyptian Pharaoh for his disobedience. Why inflicting on the common people? Even worse, the God would kill the kids of the girl slaves working as donkeys in the lowest rank. Can we still say the God behaving like this merciful? It was behaving without humanitarianism just like a Devil.
Even more abominable, the Pharaoh of Egypt wouldn’t let the Israelis leave mainly because the God had hardened the Pharaoh’s heart. Before the Ten Plagues came, the God in the Bible had done something. According to 7:3 in the Exodus, Jehovah told Moses, “And I will harden Pharaoh's heart, and multiply my signs and my wonders in the land of Egypt.”
It means the God in the Bible had prepared a trap for the Egyptians, trying to find an excuse for the following plagues. In Exodus 8:19, “Then the magicians said to Pharaoh, "This is the finger of God." But Pharaoh's heart was hardened, and he did not listen to them, as the LORD had said.”. In Exodus 9:35, “And the heart of Pharaoh was hardened, neither would he let the children of Israel go; as the LORD had spoken by Moses.” In Exodus 10:20, “But the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, so that he would not let the children of Israel go.” In Exodus 10:27, “But the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, and he would not let them go.” In Exodus 11:10, “And Moses and Aaron did all these wonders before Pharaoh: and the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, so that he would not let the children of Israel go out of his land.”
It was the God in the Bible who let the Israelis leave Egypt. But it was the same God who had hardened the Pharaoh’s heart and sparked the conflicts so that the Israelis couldn’t leave Egypt easily. So what the God in the Bible was doing? It was encouraging the people to revolt while telling the authorities about the revolt and encouraging the government to oppress them mercilessly. Isn’t such a person a schemer and two-faced?
So is this the image of the Greatest Creator?
The Israelis Are the People of the Covenant
The Bible has the Old Testament and the New Testament. The part telling what happened before Jesus was born was called the Old Testament and the part telling things after Jesus was born was the New Testament. The Testament actually means agreement, covenant, and contract. The whole Bible is the agreement, covenant and contract between the Israelis and the Greatest Creator.
So here is a paradox. There are over 3,000 nations in the world and why the God has established the Testament with the Israelis? Does this mean the other nations are not the subjects of the God? If they are, why has the God only established the Testament with the Israelis while neglecting all the other nations? If they are not, what’s the origin of all the other nations? Are Adam and Eve only the ancestors of Israelis and not the other nations? The Israelis are created by the God. Does it mean the other nations are created by the Devil?
There are 1,656 years between the Genesis and the Great Flood. There are 857 years between the Great Flood and the Exodus. There are 396 years between the Exodus and the founding of the Israeli State. There are 510 years between the founding of the Israeli State and their captive to Babylon. There are 152 years between their imprisonment in Babylon and the reestablishment of Jerusalem. There are 450 years between the rebuilding of Jerusalem and the birth of Jesus. There are 2003 years between the birth of Jesus and today. So according to the Bible, the history of human beings is about 6,376 years.
According to the Bible, there were only 8 people survived the Great Flood on the Earth. They were the couple of Noah, their three sons and their wives. It means that 4,700 years ago, there was no one else living on the Earth except for the Noah family.
But this has brought some other questions. First, where do the American Indians come from? According to the theory of Continental Drift, America drifted away from the other continents. But it couldn’t happen within 4,700 years of time. Then how the Noah family reached America from the Middle East? After the Great Flood, there were only 8 members in Noah family. It was impossible for them to get dispersed. Noah couldn’t let one of his sons and his wife to cross the freezing Siberia and the Bering Strait to get to America.
Second, where did the African blacks come from? From the perspective of genetics, the blacks, yellows and whites have their separate ancestors. A couple of pure whites couldn’t generate the blacks and yellows. Even the evolvement couldn’t produce the blacks and yellows in 3,700 years of time. Besides, according to Darwin’s evolutionary theory, the survival of the fittest, could the Israelis able to write the Bible evolve into the African blacks? The blacks are not the matches of Israelis in the intelligence no matter how we exaggerate their abilities.
Now let’s come to the Chinese nation. The first Chinese King was born about 4,600 years ago. The story of Dayu‘s Flood Control happened about 4,200 years ago. It was impossible for the future generations of Noah to come to mainland China 100 years after the Great Flood. Even if they did it, how could they produce so many people who followed Dayu to control the flood?
Where does the Chinese nation come from? Are the Flood Control by Dayu were just the Great Flood?
From the perspective of the Bible, the biological evolutionary theory could never be accepted. But once we accepted the theory, it would deny the theory that the God created the human beings. But if we denied the evolutionary theory, there was no way to explain the origin of the blacks and yellows and we can’t say Adam and Eve are the common ancestors of all human beings.
The Story of Cain
The first child of Adam and Eve, after they were driven out of the Eden, was Cain, followed by Abel. “And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the LORD. And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering: But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect.” Out of jealousy, Cain killed his brother Abel.
We want to ask the God in the Bible some questions, “Why do you favor the offerings of Abel instead of those of Cain? Is Cain killing his brother Abel not your fault? If you had never favored one of them, how could it arouse the jealousy of Cain? Why the people created by you had so many troubles? Adam and Eve wouldn’t follow your orders and their kids killed each other. As the God, you don’t have the ability to solve these problems? Or is it what you have designed?
Cain was a murderer and deserved the punishment. But you told Cain, “Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.”
So what kind of the justice standard is it? It is hardly understandable not to levy the punishment on the criminal. But it is even more understandable to have revenge of sevenfold on those who would punish the criminal. Is it protecting the criminal?
That’s why the few thousand years of human history were full of blood, violence and crime. The God in the Bible has been protecting the criminals.
“Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.” Because Cain is a criminal, we can fully understand it as ““Therefore whosoever slayeth the criminal, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.””
We can conclude we had better become criminals because the criminals are protected and the good men are not. The good men have the risk of being revenged sevenfold.
The Prophet and the Dream
In the Bible, there are a large number of prophets and dreams. The prophets are the representatives of the God in the Mortal World. They have unimaginable wisdom and power, which sink the average people with average wisdom into the mist. If someone says, “I am a prophet”, should we believe him or not. If we don’t, we are standing against the God. If we do, how can we know the prophet is a fake or not?
Now let’s talk about the dreams. There are many dreams and dream analysis in the Bible, in particular in the Revelation. Of course, those who can analyze the dreams are all prophets. But they have also brought a lot of puzzles.
First, has the prophet had the dream at all? No one could see his dream and he could well compose some dreams and cheat us. If he really had the dream, was his analysis correct, or was he analyzing the dream on the reverse aspect?
I want to ask the God in the Bible, in the Old Testament, you used to talk directly with the human beings. Then why you stopped doing so later? Are the Adam and Eve on other planets also disobeying your orders? Why would you warn the human beings in the form of dreams? Why not tell us the truth directly? Don’t you have the ability to do so? Don’t you have time? Don you have some secret sorrow?
I can give many other examples to state that the God in the Bible does not have the features of being unique and exclusive, amorphous, neutral, mysterious, impartial, supremely powerful, merciful and wise as genuine Greatest Creator has.
So we can affirm that “the God in the Bible is not the genuine Greatest Creator”.

Xuefeng First of all, we have to admit that the Bible is the accomplishment of the Ephraim which loyally records the Jewish history, explains the relationship between the God, Devil and human beings to the furthest degree, and gives the direction the human beings should take. The Bible, the Koran, the Buddhist Scripture and the Tao Te Ching are the eternal and effective treasures and collections of human wisdom, teaching us how to behave and develop into the higher level of life space. “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth”. The first sentence in the Bible did tell the truth. But the things covered by the cossack may not be the holly things. And the people wearing the sacred cassock may not be the abbot. The problem with the Bible is that the God it introduces is not the genuine Greatest Creator. We have known that the Greatest Creator has the 8 features. The Greatest Creator is unique and exclusive, amorphous, neutral, mysterious, impartial, merciful, supremely powerful and intelligent. The wisdom of the Greatest Creator is revealed through its creation of universe order, designing of LIFE program and knowing of the past and the future. Then, does the God in the Bible have the above-mentioned 8 features? Let’s explain this with examples. The Betrayal of Adam and Eve According to the Genesis, Adam and Eve were instigated to eat the fruit on the Wisdom Tree forbidden by the God in the Bible. Because they have violated the order of the God (in the Bible), they were repelled out of the Eden. It indicates that the God in the Bible is a. incompetent; b. improvident; and c. unjust. He is incompetent because he was a loser at the beginning. The first couple of human he created betrayed him. So can we still say it is supremely powerful? Can we still believe in a “person” who often loses? The Great Flood had killed most of the human beings. What happened to them afterwards? They still wouldn’t listen to his words. The Moses Ten Commandments are actually the directives of the God in the Bible. Can you tell me how many of them are obeyed by the human being? Actually not even one. The God in the Bible seemed to know nothing about how to control the human beings. The only measure it takes is to voice warnings and threats against the human beings. Thousands of years has passed, the human beings remain the same. Is there no means to control the human beings? Or is there some other force constraining this Almighty God? If this is the case, is this God not sole or exclusive? For thousands of years, the human beings have been violating hisorder. What is he waiting for? The God in the Bible is improvident because he didn’t know that Adam and Eve were going to betray him or the development trend of what he had created. Is this God, who is not able to predict the future or the past, still reliable? If the Earth is going to get out of the Solar System and this God knows nothing about it, how can he save the human beings? How can this GOD administer the deities, Buddha, celestial beings and Devils when he found it difficult to control the human beings? How can he manage the spacious Universe? The God in the Bible is unjust because it cannot tell wrong from the right and because it is unreasonable. Why would Adam and Eve betray the God in the Bible? There are three major reasons. First, the genetic structure of Adam and Eve had faults, or was imperfect. The life created by this God was now its own constraint. This angered the God very much. It is just like the house built by an architect who put every efforts was fallen and hit his own feet. Is the house or the architect that should be blamed? The second reason they betrayed is that they were instigated and seduced by the snake. Adam and Eve are humans while behind the snake was the Devil Satan. The energy and wisdom of human beings can’t match those of the Devil. This God didn’t punish the Devil Satan. Instead, it imposed inflictions on Adam and Eve and drove them out of Eden. Is it fair? If a rapist raped an 8-year-old girl, would it be fair to blame the girl for her sexual organ and weakness instead of bringing justice to the rapist? The third reason of betrayal, which is also the most important one, is the damned Wisdom Tree that can tell the good and evil. Who has planted it in the Eden and why? It’s just like putting a poisonous sweet on the dinner table for the kids. Or it’s like playing the porn video for the young girls while teaching them to retain their innocence. Would a moral person do such a thing? Isn’t this “person” who planted the Wisdom Tree in the Eden has caused the betrayal of Adam and Eve? Besides, does this God, who had created Adam and Eve, has other measures to take rather than driving Adam and Eve out of the Eden? Is it fair not to give them a second chance simply because they have made only one mistake? Does one mistake justify their life-long sins? Jesus came to the Mortal World to atone for the human beings’ sins. According to the Bible, all the people have their “original sin”. Where does the “original sin” come from? Actually, they are inherited from Adam and Eve, the ancestors of human beings, whose sins were formed because they had eaten the fruit on the damned Wisdom Tree. When we are born, we have the “original sin” inherited from Adam and Eve. The “cross” on our back was much too heavy. According to this logic, “the son of a thief is always a thief”, “the son of a criminal is always a criminal”, and “the son of an emperor is always an emperor”. That’s why in ancient China, in the feudal period in particular, “If a man committed crime, all his family members would be sentenced to death”, or “If a man attained the Tao, even his pets ascended to Heaven”. This also explains why the thrones can only be passed on to the next generations of royal families. This is because it complies with the logic in the Bible. If somebody has sins, the God in the Bible and the Satan sined first. Is it humanitarian to inflict on billions of humans throughout the history simply because of the wrongdoings of Adam and Eve? Why not executing Adam and Eve and creating a new pair of humans at the time? Is creating a new couple so difficult for the God in the Bible? All the people are born with sins. This is why each of us comes to the Mortal World to endure the sufferings. But the sins are not inherited from our ancestors. They are made by oursleves in the previous cycle of life. If we don’t have sins, we would all have become Buddha or celestial beings. Ten Plagues of Egypt According to the Exodus, when Moses and Aaron, in the capacity of the GOD in the Bible, asked the Egyptian Pharaoh to let the Israelis leave Egypt, they were refused. Consequently, the GOD in the Bible imposed 10 plagues on Egypt. 1. Plague of Blood The water of the Nile will be changed into blood. The fish in the Nile will die, and the river will stink; the Egyptians will not be able to drink its water. 2. Plague of Frogs. The Nile will teem with frogs. They will come up into your palace and your bedroom and onto your bed, into the houses of your officials and on your people, and into your ovens and kneading troughs. The frogs will go up on you and your people and all your officials. 3. Plague of Lice.The dust of the ground became lice, lice came upon men and animals. All the dust throughout the land of Egypt became lice. 4. Plague of Flies The houses of the Egyptians will be full of flies, and even the ground where they are. 5. Plague of Livestock Death The fifth plague of Egypt was an epidemic disease which exterminated the Egyptian livestock; that is, horses, donkeys, camels, cattle, sheep and goats; 6. Plague of Boils The sixth plague of Egypt was Shkhin. The Shkhin was a kind of skin disease, usually translated as "boils".; 7. Plague of Hail The seventh plague of Egypt was a destructive storm; 8. Plague of Locusts Locusts will devour what little you have left after the hail, including every tree that is growing in your fields.; 9. Plague of Darkness Total darkness covered all Egypt for three days 10. Death of the Firstborn The tenth and final plague of Egypt was the death of all first born in Egypt — no one escaped, from the lowest servant to Pharaoh's own first-born son, including first-born of livestock. It is understandable that the God punished Egypt because Egyptian Pharaoh wouldn’t obey his order. However, it was unreasonable and went too far to kill the first-born of all humans and animals in Egypt. You can punish the Egyptian Pharaoh for his disobedience. Why inflicting on the common people? Even worse, the God would kill the kids of the girl slaves working as donkeys in the lowest rank. Can we still say the God behaving like this merciful? It was behaving without humanitarianism just like a Devil. Even more abominable, the Pharaoh of Egypt wouldn’t let the Israelis leave mainly because the God had hardened the Pharaoh’s heart. Before the Ten Plagues came, the God in the Bible had done something. According to 7:3 in the Exodus, Jehovah told Moses, “And I will harden Pharaoh's heart, and multiply my signs and my wonders in the land of Egypt.” It means the God in the Bible had prepared a trap for the Egyptians, trying to find an excuse for the following plagues. In Exodus 8:19, “Then the magicians said to Pharaoh, "This is the finger of God." But Pharaoh's heart was hardened, and he did not listen to them, as the LORD had said.”. In Exodus 9:35, “And the heart of Pharaoh was hardened, neither would he let the children of Israel go; as the LORD had spoken by Moses.” In Exodus 10:20, “But the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, so that he would not let the children of Israel go.” In Exodus 10:27, “But the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, and he would not let them go.” In Exodus 11:10, “And Moses and Aaron did all these wonders before Pharaoh: and the LORD hardened Pharaoh's heart, so that he would not let the children of Israel go out of his land.” It was the God in the Bible who let the Israelis leave Egypt. But it was the same God who had hardened the Pharaoh’s heart and sparked the conflicts so that the Israelis couldn’t leave Egypt easily. So what the God in the Bible was doing? It was encouraging the people to revolt while telling the authorities about the revolt and encouraging the government to oppress them mercilessly. Isn’t such a person a schemer and two-faced? So is this the image of the Greatest Creator? The Israelis Are the People of the Covenant The Bible has the Old Testament and the New Testament. The part telling what happened before Jesus was born was called the Old Testament and the part telling things after Jesus was born was the New Testament. The Testament actually means agreement, covenant, and contract. The whole Bible is the agreement, covenant and contract between the Israelis and the Greatest Creator. So here is a paradox. There are over 3,000 nations in the world and why the God has established the Testament with the Israelis? Does this mean the other nations are not the subjects of the God? If they are, why has the God only established the Testament with the Israelis while neglecting all the other nations? If they are not, what’s the origin of all the other nations? Are Adam and Eve only the ancestors of Israelis and not the other nations? The Israelis are created by the God. Does it mean the other nations are created by the Devil? There are 1,656 years between the Genesis and the Great Flood. There are 857 years between the Great Flood and the Exodus. There are 396 years between the Exodus and the founding of the Israeli State. There are 510 years between the founding of the Israeli State and their captive to Babylon. There are 152 years between their imprisonment in Babylon and the reestablishment of Jerusalem. There are 450 years between the rebuilding of Jerusalem and the birth of Jesus. There are 2003 years between the birth of Jesus and today. So according to the Bible, the history of human beings is about 6,376 years. According to the Bible, there were only 8 people survived the Great Flood on the Earth. They were the couple of Noah, their three sons and their wives. It means that 4,700 years ago, there was no one else living on the Earth except for the Noah family. But this has brought some other questions. First, where do the American Indians come from? According to the theory of Continental Drift, America drifted away from the other continents. But it couldn’t happen within 4,700 years of time. Then how the Noah family reached America from the Middle East? After the Great Flood, there were only 8 members in Noah family. It was impossible for them to get dispersed. Noah couldn’t let one of his sons and his wife to cross the freezing Siberia and the Bering Strait to get to America. Second, where did the African blacks come from? From the perspective of genetics, the blacks, yellows and whites have their separate ancestors. A couple of pure whites couldn’t generate the blacks and yellows. Even the evolvement couldn’t produce the blacks and yellows in 3,700 years of time. Besides, according to Darwin’s evolutionary theory, the survival of the fittest, could the Israelis able to write the Bible evolve into the African blacks? The blacks are not the matches of Israelis in the intelligence no matter how we exaggerate their abilities. Now let’s come to the Chinese nation. The first Chinese King was born about 4,600 years ago. The story of Dayu‘s Flood Control happened about 4,200 years ago. It was impossible for the future generations of Noah to come to mainland China 100 years after the Great Flood. Even if they did it, how could they produce so many people who followed Dayu to control the flood? Where does the Chinese nation come from? Are the Flood Control by Dayu were just the Great Flood? From the perspective of the Bible, the biological evolutionary theory could never be accepted. But once we accepted the theory, it would deny the theory that the God created the human beings. But if we denied the evolutionary theory, there was no way to explain the origin of the blacks and yellows and we can’t say Adam and Eve are the common ancestors of all human beings. The Story of Cain The first child of Adam and Eve, after they were driven out of the Eden, was Cain, followed by Abel. “And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the LORD. And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering: But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect.” Out of jealousy, Cain killed his brother Abel. We want to ask the God in the Bible some questions, “Why do you favor the offerings of Abel instead of those of Cain? Is Cain killing his brother Abel not your fault? If you had never favored one of them, how could it arouse the jealousy of Cain? Why the people created by you had so many troubles? Adam and Eve wouldn’t follow your orders and their kids killed each other. As the God, you don’t have the ability to solve these problems? Or is it what you have designed? Cain was a murderer and deserved the punishment. But you told Cain, “Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.” So what kind of the justice standard is it? It is hardly understandable not to levy the punishment on the criminal. But it is even more understandable to have revenge of sevenfold on those who would punish the criminal. Is it protecting the criminal? That’s why the few thousand years of human history were full of blood, violence and crime. The God in the Bible has been protecting the criminals. “Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.” Because Cain is a criminal, we can fully understand it as ““Therefore whosoever slayeth the criminal, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.”” We can conclude we had better become criminals because the criminals are protected and the good men are not. The good men have the risk of being revenged sevenfold. The Prophet and the Dream In the Bible, there are a large number of prophets and dreams. The prophets are the representatives of the God in the Mortal World. They have unimaginable wisdom and power, which sink the average people with average wisdom into the mist. If someone says, “I am a prophet”, should we believe him or not. If we don’t, we are standing against the God. If we do, how can we know the prophet is a fake or not? Now let’s talk about the dreams. There are many dreams and dream analysis in the Bible, in particular in the Revelation. Of course, those who can analyze the dreams are all prophets. But they have also brought a lot of puzzles. First, has the prophet had the dream at all? No one could see his dream and he could well compose some dreams and cheat us. If he really had the dream, was his analysis correct, or was he analyzing the dream on the reverse aspect? I want to ask the God in the Bible, in the Old Testament, you used to talk directly with the human beings. Then why you stopped doing so later? Are the Adam and Eve on other planets also disobeying your orders? Why would you warn the human beings in the form of dreams? Why not tell us the truth directly? Don’t you have the ability to do so? Don’t you have time? Don you have some secret sorrow? I can give many other examples to state that the God in the Bible does not have the features of being unique and exclusive, amorphous, neutral, mysterious, impartial, supremely powerful, merciful and wise as genuine Greatest Creator has. So we can affirm that “the God in the Bible is not the genuine Greatest Creator”.

(THE SH TAG IS ONLY USED BECAUSE I TALK ABOUT SUICIDE. I'm not suicidal, anymore.)
There was a time when I was happy. A simple time. A time when the only thing I had to worry about, was the next episode of starwars the clone wars.
Now I'm college age, have no job, basically nothing resembling a life, dreams and ambitions that died at conception, didn't finish highschool, and for a while I wanted to kill myself.
Don't anymore. Mostly out of stubborn refusal to die. Because it doesn't make anything any better. It's not a solution.
So while I'm no longer suicidal, I do still wish things were better. That things were like they used to be.
Back when I was happy. Back when the little things made me smile. When we could sit and chat for a while.
It's like my whole life is rubble, and I have to try to build something out of it. Pick up the shattered pieces of a once stable building, and try to reassemble it.
I don't have a flying clue what I'm doing. But whatever it is it's not getting me anywhere. And so I just numb the pain and move on, pretend like nothing's changed or nothing's different.
Only it's all different and almost everything's changed. I don't know how people do it, how they manage to build a life for themselves.
Sometimes I can barely manage to get out of bed. Every move feels like a ball and chain tied to my ankle.
And it just seems that nothing will get better, or change. I don't want to go see my dad, because I don't want to see what's become of him, to see how he's not even half the man he once was. To see the disheveled wreck left over from that near miss car accident.
I just want him back. Like he used to be. And I wanted anybody in the medical field to give a damn. But they didn't. Because all they see is dollar signs when they see people. We're god damn cattle to them. Nothing else. It might aswell be modern slavery.
People are not supposed to be defined by monetary value. So why are they?
It's all bullshit. All of it. And I hope this country fails because of it. At this point, we deserve it.

I have DID. My partner and I both had very very traumatic childhoods. His almost seems worse than mine sometimes (I know, no trauma comparing) we’ve known eachother for 13 years, witnessed each other being abused, both of us have lived together and supported eachother through our trauma healing for the last 5-6 years. They have all the same behaviour I have, to the point where one of our parts said to us “if they don’t have DID, than we don’t.” Jokingly. They have the same type of expirences we have, but explain it away as something else, even when that explanation doesn’t make sense or add up. They’ve called themselves “we.” We treat them as if they have DID because if we don’t, we get into fights with him, unintentionally. I literally can’t treat him as a singlet because it doesn’t work for him. This is what led to us realizing he acts like someone with DID, before we thought that’s what was happening, we witnessed his changes in affect and behavior and his denial of things he’s said or done as possible gaslighting and one of our protectors almost forced us to break up with him over it. (That protector has since changed their mind and now trusts him—as he’s never once tried to hurt us) Since respecting all his different states as their own parts and refusing to question their contradictions and memory loss, since I’ve stopped treating him like a singlet and only expect from him what I’d expect of someone with DID—our relationship has become very harmonious and he’s seemed to open up and feel a lot safer around me than before. They don’t know that we treat them as if they have DID, we’ve had to adjust quietly, because the idea that they have DID triggers them so much that they treat us with legit ptsd type fear if we bring up the possibility. I’ve sworn that I’ve seen them switch many times. I have a list of the different states and how they act, their different preferences, I take notes in case one day he wants to know what I’ve witnessed. He refers to “different parts” of himself by titles like “New York me” and “Teenaged me” He told me he has “perfect memory” and nervously laughed about it, so I asked what we both did three days ago and he couldn’t remember anything at all, and using humor as a coping mechanism said “no! That doesn’t count!” and we both laughed about it. They are already diagnosed with DP/DR and severe ptsd for context. They have childlike parts that sound like little kids and want to be treated like little kids and cannot engage in anything inappropriate, after a very stressful situation the other day, one of those littles told me their name. Just announced it. I’ve tried to point out the signs of DID to them before and met a very very angry version of them I’ve never seen before who looked at me like I was a threat to their existence and threatened me to never bring it up ever again or else. (Which legit scared me, I’d never seen him treat me like that or act that way before and he looked at me like I was nothing but a threat to his existence. He never brought it up again, When I asked him about it a week later he had no idea what I was talking about, and only remembered the moments right before and right after, and he refused to believe he missed time in between. He then started dissociating and acting physically triggered so I dropped it)
So what do I do? I told the alter part that recently announced themselves that I loved their name and just went along with it, engaged with them as an adult would to a kid, and didn’t point anything out. I just treated them like they were always there and talked about whatever they wanted to talk about. I looked for signs of switching throughout the rest of the day and just acclimated to each part as I noticed them.
Do I keep up what I’ve been doing? If they start rapid switching or having a dissociative episode I comfort them the way I comfort my system and it works really well. When they switch I (for lack of a better word) code-switch and adjust to how I know that alter wants to be treated. (They all want to be treated differently—-which is why I had to start treating them like a system—-otherwise they’d get in fights with me because I’d point out that “as a singlet” they keep expecting so many different and opposite things from me and I can’t keep up, which just made them very defensive and would cause them to deny this fact and around we went in circles)
So should I respect the alter than told me to back off and not bring it up and just continue to be covertly aware and respect his different parts needs and adjust to them? It’s not super hard for me, it’s exhuasting to an extent but not the way it is for me to mask my autism or other things I deal with. It feels kind of healing to treat him the way I like to be treated, and he treats me just like that too. (He’s very good about me being a system and seems to intuitively understand a lot without me even needing to explain and has actually given me a lot of insight, something that so far only other “known” system-friends have been able to provide for me.)
They are going thru an extremely stressful financial period right now and have no health insurance for therapist and no access to the prescribed medication they need, and need to stay stable and in control in order to afford rent and hold down a job. So I do not think doing anything to risk causing him a crisis would be safe for him but I really want him to find healing and therapy eventually. Just looking for advice?

Just learned today that my offer was accepted on a townhouse $715k at asking price. It’s certainly going to be a stretch for me (about $2k more than my current rent) and to be honest, it’s giving me a ton of anxiety. I have to sign the purchase agreement tomorrow tomorrow and cross my fingers that rates dip a little bit.
For the average person here, did you really have 6 months of emergency funds saved? Just saving 10% down took me several years. I feel like this is my only chance for a while to own. To have six months saved would take me another few years. Maybe some of you will roll your eyes at that, but I’m pretty proud that I was able to save 10% in this environment.
Any advice?

The signs seem to be everywhere. Since GME started to run we are supposed to believe the following incredible (and sometimes contradictory) facts/occurrences are unrelated

• DFV returned (and retail bid up the price just like that because only retail can move market prices like that /s)
  
• a huge batch of 39 month LEAPs from March 2021 expired
  
• boomer media freaking out - but boomer say not interested and boomer say poor investment- why boomer even care then?!,!?
  
• random people you tried to explain it to years ago suddenly texting you wondering what’s going on with GME
  
• trying to remind said random people gently that the boomeMSM is owned by big finance and infiltrated/pressured by various state intelligence agencies (cf proof of WMDs) and that yes you are being lied to about damn near everything in order to sell you crap or manufacture your consent
  
• Equities still elevated despite persistent inflation (German accent for emphasis) “NEIN!! Ze collateral shall not FALL!”
  
• the precious metals market wigging out - silver is over 30/oz (much cheaper than that really good 18% weed back in the day) —- this is honestly one of the more crazy ones, look up what’s going on with the settlement of contracts at the vaults - Michael lynch has some good stuff on this
  
• ATH in major equities markets
  
• houses unaffordable for the majority of people under 30 and not in Big (steaming pile) Tech
  
• billions In taxpayer dollars each month it seems to “defend freedom abroad” but it all really goes back into US defense
  
• Jim Simons, dude who quite literally made important contributions to quantum theory (Chern Simons theory) then ran the worlds most successful hedge fund, had his fund buy 100M of GME right before he died
  

Anyhow all this is seemingly coming to a head, like Right Now —— While I am paranoid by nature and , I ask you to consider the possibility that maybe GME here is one piece of a larger puzzle that involves people realizing how to assert their own agency and that by simply buying and holding we are breaking an ancient and very powerful form of parasitic entity, banking or otherwise that has been sitting on the human race for a while now,
🏴‍☠️🏴‍☠️🏴‍☠️ I still bought more GME today regardless 🏴‍☠️🏴‍☠️🏴‍☠️

Sri Lanka, with its rich tapestry of landscapes ranging from pristine beaches to misty mountains and dense rainforests, is a playground for adventure enthusiasts. From surfing along the coast to hiking through rugged terrain and encountering wildlife in its natural habitat, there's no shortage of exhilarating experiences waiting to be discovered. Join us as we delve into the must-try adventures that make Sri Lanka a haven for thrill-seekers.
Surfing in Arugam Bay: Riding the Waves
Our adventure begins on the east coast of Sri Lanka, in the laid-back beach town of Arugam Bay. Known as one of the best surfing destinations in the world, Arugam Bay offers perfect waves for surfers of all levels, from beginners to experienced riders. Whether you're a novice looking to catch your first wave or an experienced surfer seeking a new challenge, Arugam Bay has something for everyone, making it an ideal destination for those booking Sri Lanka tour packages.
Heading out to the lineup, we paddle into the azure waters of the Indian Ocean, feeling the thrill of catching our first wave and riding it all the way to shore. With the sun on our backs and the sound of the surf in our ears, we lose ourselves in the rhythm of the ocean, carving through the waves and feeling a sense of freedom like never before.
Hiking in Ella: Scaling Peaks and Chasing Waterfalls
Leaving the coast behind, we head inland to the misty mountains of Ella, a picturesque hill town surrounded by lush tea plantations and verdant valleys. Lace up your hiking boots and get ready to explore some of Sri Lanka's most breathtaking landscapes.
Our first stop is Little Adam's Peak, a relatively easy hike that rewards us with panoramic views of the surrounding countryside from its summit. Continuing our adventure, we trek through dense forests and along rocky paths to reach the majestic Ella Rock, where we're treated to sweeping vistas of the Ella Gap and the distant peaks beyond.
Whale Watching in Mirissa: Encounter Giants of the Sea
No trip to Sri Lanka would be complete without a whale watching adventure off the coast of Mirissa, where we have the opportunity to encounter some of the ocean's most magnificent creatures up close.
Boarding a sturdy boat, we set out into the open waters of the Indian Ocean, scanning the horizon for signs of movement. Suddenly, a spout of water erupts from the surface, followed by the sight of a massive blue whale breaking the surface in a breathtaking display of power and grace. As we watch in awe, pods of dolphins playfully leap alongside the boat, completing the magical experience.
White Water Rafting in Kitulgala: Conquer the Rapids
For adrenaline junkies seeking the ultimate thrill, white water rafting in Kitulgala is an adventure not to be missed. Nestled amidst the lush forests of the central highlands, Kitulgala is home to some of the best white water rafting experiences in Asia, with exhilarating rapids and stunning scenery at every turn.
Strapping on our life jackets and helmets, we paddle our way through turbulent waters, navigating steep drops and swirling currents with the help of our expert guides. With each twist and turn of the river, we feel a rush of adrenaline coursing through our veins, making for an unforgettable adventure that will leave us craving more.
Safari in Yala National Park: Encounter Wildlife in the Wild
Our final adventure takes us to Yala National Park, Sri Lanka's premier wildlife sanctuary and home to a diverse array of exotic animals, including leopards, elephants, and sloth bears.
Boarding a rugged safari jeep, we venture deep into the heart of the park, our eyes peeled for signs of movement amidst the dense foliage. Suddenly, a majestic leopard emerges from the shadows, its golden coat glistening in the sunlight as it prowls through the underbrush in search of prey. As we continue our safari, we encounter herds of elephants bathing in the river, colorful birds flitting through the trees, and playful monkeys swinging from branch to branch, offering a glimpse into the rich tapestry of life that thrives in this pristine wilderness.
Conclusion: An Adventure of a Lifetime
As our adventure-filled journey through Sri Lanka comes to an end, we're filled with a sense of exhilaration and gratitude for the experiences we've shared and the memories we've made along the way. From riding the waves in Arugam Bay to hiking through misty mountains, encountering giants of the sea in Mirissa, conquering rapids in Kitulgala, and encountering wildlife in Yala National Park, Sri Lanka has captured our hearts and left us with a lifetime of cherished memories.
Whether you're a seasoned thrill-seeker or an adventurous soul looking to push your boundaries, Sri Lanka offers a myriad of experiences that are sure to satisfy your craving for adventure. So pack your bags, embark on your own Sri Lankan adventure, and prepare to be amazed by the wonders that await in this tropical paradise.

(WARNING, Loooots of reading)
Ok so, I can’t summon anyone, yes I’ve done it all, I’ve done all the troubleshooting, it seems like a total glitch, and no it’s not like “it won’t let me summon when I press the gold signs..” BRO I wish I saw the gold signs, they don’t show up
Last year I think? (Yes this has been going on for a year now, or maybe a bit more, hasn’t been fixed since) I went to the Beyond the Fog sub, for me to summon someone through that reddit since furlcalling does nothing, yet still, I did everything I was supposed to, yet not even them could join, they were surprised too, saying they don’t even know what could be causing this. Had to defeat Mali on my own, then after that deleted the game and quit,
I came back after a few months later and HEY I actually got someone! But I knew something was up, since it was just them, not a single other gold sign so I knew I wasn’t out of the woods, before this bs I used to get so many gold signs it didn’t even matter who i summoned or if i died lol, it was just fun.. now, well.. anyway they helped me defeat Godfrey and then I took another loong break, cut to now, a couple days ago i actually got someone, though I still knew I wasn’t free from this torture cuz it was one single gold sign, 3 times in a row, the same person.
Nothing works and I give up lol, anyone at least have some sort of idea what this could be? A little? If it counts for anything this started after deleting one of my save files, after I deleted that character and started a new one, this happened
Also yes my internet is fine, I can see other players, bloodstains, make messages, and all that, I also can’t be summoned, like co op is completely off, but not online, just the co op side of things, how infuriating.

Hi all. I've been on 50mg ER for a little over three years and feel like the time is right to come off desven. I spoke with my GP, who I have a great relationship with, this week and after taking through the options, he recommended just signing me off from work for a couple of weeks while I withdraw.
I'm in Australia and apparently 50mg is the lowest dose that's readily available. The only compounding pharmacy in the area advised that while they could make lower dose capsules for me to taper, they wouldn't be covered by the PBS so would be significantly more expensive.
My GP reckons that tapering slowly might just drag the withdrawal process out, and it might be worth a shot just going cold turkey. He's signed me off work for a week initially and is available over the phone or email with any concerns I have during this time. I'm now on day two of no desven and I feel truly horrible but it's bearable (just).
I guess I just want to know has anyone been recommended this course of action? How did it go? How long can I reasonably expect withdrawal symptoms to last at a level that affects my ability to function?

Chapter 1: the event
It was the fall of my intern year as I bean my off service trauma rotation. This month was ubiquitously notorious for being the most labor intrusive and least productive rotaion of our emergency medicine program. Knowing this I entered with the intention of simply surviving the month.
Another intern and I let’s call them A for sake of ambiguity, we’re the first emergency medicine residents to roste on the trauma services that year. A shaky start would be an understatement. In the words of chance the raper “like my grama with the Parkinson’s playing operation.” Would better describe it. Medically we did well. We were very competent and completed our work daily, but communication and coordination was non existent. Our Cheifs had informed us that Tuesday was our day of and the Trauma cheif residents had minimum communication with us, or our Cheifs as it seams when A and I did not report on Tuesday they sternly made their dissatisfaction known.
I have struggled with insomnia sense the age of 10. Had 2 sleep studies by this point in my life and been prescribed nearly every sleeping aid on the market. The 80-94 hr work weeks of our trauma rotaion only worsened my insomnia. My lack of sleep likely contributed to a less than prime adaptive immune system and 2 days out of my trauma rotaion I contracted strep like symptoms with associated nausea, requiring me to call for a sick day the next day. No the first day that I felt too ill to work. I was not fully aware of the reporting process. I reported to my Chiefs, but I did not believe I could come to work tomorrow with amble time and notice, however I was somewhat delayed in letting their Cheifs know, because the surgical chiefs rotated every few days and I did not know who my was going to be the next day. The second day which I had to call out sick I was able to locate the cheif for the next day and reprot according to our university’s protocol, which requires that if a resident feels they are not fit for work they must not come in and the university must have staff coverage without any fear or implementation of punitive actions.
I had finally survived to the last week of my trauma rotaion and I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. What I could not see was the pile of stress, shitty diet, lack of mental well ness and sleep deprivation which I was pushing down to reach the light. By this time I had seen a psychiatrist regularly for sleep medication. I had mentioned to him that I had been experiencing more stressed lately and feel that I might be depressed. he reassured me that it was likely only due to my circumstances, given the difficulty of the trauma rotation and wish to reassess once the rotation was over. Looking back I had to fill the habit of drinking more than I usually do. My only on nights before I have days off became 1-2 beers every other night. All of this repressed unhealthy shit finally pushed bad on September 23rd. That night I was at work even later than usual, I stayed up later than usual and couldn’t seem to fall asleep. With the stress of only having minimal sleep and knowing I only had 2 more days of trauma left, I took an extra dose of my sleeping medication.
I opened my eyes to the fighting sight of sun beaming in my window and I instantly knew I was late. (Sense I hadn’t seen the sun in a month) . Due to my need for scrupulous sleep hygiene I have been sleeping with my phone of and away for me. I rushed to grab it and watched as the little Apple logo seamed to glow on the screen for an eternity. Then in conjunction with its fading I saw 3 missed calls from my director, a text from college A and 2 missed calls from the surgical director. Still, I was able to calm myself, knowing that resident A had been late to this rotation by a few hours 2 other days and nothing came of it. I called my director back and he asked me to report to his office where I was greeted by my director, my coordinator and another emergency medicine facility.
With the only explanation of: “we just want you to get better”, I was handed a letter, to my relief it did not entail my termination, but a declaration of administrative leave and a requirement to undergo an evaluation at a well known university in Florida.
Lake any other savvy millennial, I did my research. By research I mean numerous google searches and screeches thru the depts of redit. To my dismay I discovered that in order for a residency program to fire you, they must first initiate an administrative suspension. I would soon find out however, being terminated would have been a delightful outcome compared to what ensued.
I spend the next few weeks in the wallos of regret and depression. I indulged in higher qualities of alchohol then I ever have before. I all but ceased communing with peers, and abruptly stoped any physical activity I had once enjoyed. Frightened as I was I was ensured, it will be ok “we just want you to get better”
Chapter 2 The evaluation : guilty until proven innocent I did exactly as instructed and scheduled an evaluation, I supposed that this was either a mental evaluation to assess if I’m fit for work with plans of termination or it actually was an evaluation to better treat my insomnia. To this day I regret my ignorance, and wish I had researched the process more. The Hindi / sand-skrt idea of Hamsa 🪬 is that in order to do any good you must have full knowledge or else good intentions can result in harm. I truely believe my director had good intentions, however but him and I did not have full knowledge of the nature of this evaluation.
Looking back see how easily I could have avoided my troubles by asserting legal aid at this point or even by researching this evaluation process more in depth. If one searches impaired practitioner program which I now know this evaluator works for, the search entire will populate 5 or 6 layferms along side their home website and there is a valid reason for this.
If one every finds themself in this process I employ you to bring a DSM to your evaluation or at least be familiar with the most common use disorders in the DSM-5, because your evaluation will turn into a dance of questions where the evaluator attempts to trap you in a round about way to stating something that may qualify for one of the diagnosis. I have provided an image from the DSM-5 below outlining AUD, which the evaluator concluded that I had the most severe from:
Image
Example***** Here are 10 examples of how he fraudulently assessed me taken directly from his assessment note.

1. Evaluator: Have you ever stoped drinking in the last year.

Me: yes I stoped every week day, I was only drinking on the weekends, until two weeks ago.
-Evaluator uses stoping and starting every week to qualify for 2 or more unsuccessful attempts to stop in the last year “There is a persistent desire or unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control alcohol use.”

1. Evaluator Have you ever had withdrawal symptoms

Me no
Evaluator Well Have you ever had a hangover? You know that’s a from of acute withdrawal
Me: yes in college, I had a few but that was years ago and I’m pretty sure the pathophysiology is different.
Evaluator uses this to count for withdrawal symptoms even tho is was more than a year ago

1. Evaluator: Have you even taken your sleeping medication on a day or night which you drank? Me: Yes, I took my prescriptions are prescribed but I never drank close to bed

Evaluator: qualified this as dangerous behavior with alcohol (where the DSM gives examples such as unprotected sex and drunk driving). The sleeping medication I was on is not a benzodiazepine therefore it is not deadly with alcohol. I personally have seen many patients in the ED who have taken their entire bottle of the medication and drank copious amounts, we just monitor them over night and rehydrate them

1. Evaluator Has anyone told you you drink to much or been worried about you Me: No I drink much less than my friends

Evaluator what about your girlfriend? Me: well she actually doesn’t drink at all she doesn’t like it. She often buys me beer for The Weeknd’s tho. One time we went to a movie and she got a little irritated because I waited for beer then complained about them not having any craft beer. So she said, “you couldn’t have just said no” and drank something else. However, she apologized after and said it’s worth waiting if it’s my only day off.
Evaluator said this qualifies for continued drinking despite causing significant relation consequences, ie divorce.

1. Evaluator : you have sleep issues I hear, and your chart says you’ve had depression in the past, don’t you know that alcohol can effect your sleep and mood Me: yes that’s why I never drink within 3 hours of sleep.

Evaluator but you knew this and still drank
Evaluator: qualifies for drinking despite unwanted physical or psychological effects (this should be recurring to effects the alcohol is causing, I have had insomnia sense the age of 10 long before I took my first sip)
7 evaluator you were late for work and told my you had a drink the day before
Me: Yes but I was late because I didn’t sleep and took double my sleeping meds, I will never do that again
Qualifies for 2 significant work or school issues in the past year ( a therapist and other psychologist ensured me that being late on or a few days doesn’t count they typically are getting fired or failing) ( moreover, this would assume I was late do to drinking it’s self and also assume if happened more than once)

1. • Alcohol is often taken in larger amounts or over a longer period than was intended

He never once asked anything related to this question yet said I qualified in his final report 9. A great deal of time is spent in activities necessary to obtain alcohol, use alcohol, or recover from its effects. The evaluators logic here was sense I was late for work and I had 2 beers the day before I must be taking long to recover from it (this is assuming I missed due to alcohol)

1. Tolerance drinking more to require the same effect: this he checked as true in his final note however it was never even discussed in our evaluation. I did mention to him that I’ve been drinking more than I had earlier in the year frequency wise, but they said nothing to do with quantity or needing more.
   
2. Wanting to drink so bad you can not think of anything else: this is the only qualification of SAUD my evaluator said I did not have.
   

Moreover, without legal help I was not aware that I could obtain a second evaluation or even oppose going to get evaluated at all, but that wouldn’t have mattered seeing I still thought this was for my health and wellbeing as seen when I was asked why do you think you are here to today, to which I replayed “so that I can be evaluated to see what is needed to get back to work”.
To maks the ordeal more infuriating the evaluator continues to ingratiate himself and lie through the process telling you, “it will be fine as long as you are 100% honest”, “anything you say in here is between you and me” or “you slipped up once with your meds, I know your residnecy program they will probably just want a few more out patient tests”
Two weeks later I received a phone call right before I left for an out of state vacation to visit my nice for her birthday. During the call I was informed that I would be required to complete a partial hospitalization program (PHP) lasting “6-10 weeks” which would coast from 15-50 grand not including doctor visits or housing which is billed separately. I suppressed this inconvenience, enjoyed my vocation and reported when I returned, knowing that I must complete this soon so I may return to work with due to the fact that my payed time off would soon be diminished. At this time I had not yet heard of the organization PRN.
Chapter 3 Guilty till proven innocent: The diagnosis
Shell shocked I arrived to a in patient psychiatric unit and was rapidly cleared to progress to treatment without detoxification. During my 90 day of forced rehabilitation I met a few other individuals who were unjustly and fraudulently forced into treatment. I began to look up to one of these such members of the men’s community, who I will refer to as patient X for ambiguity sake.
Unlike me patient X did have alcohol use disorder. He spent many clinic days drinking to avoid alcoholic withdraws. The curious component of his story is that he admitted his depravity, saught help and through his own journey became sober. The bodies at be, namely his local physician, Health monitoring program, rejected his personal path to sobriety and forced him to undergo 90 days of in patient treatment before he could practice medicine again. When he checked in to rehab he had been sober for over a year.
Ask for Stories of people from online
As for me I spend many sleepless nights pondering how consuming a legal substance in a moderate amount could throw me into significant legal financial issues. My labs my toxicology, my story and my collateral from colleagues from colleagues all indicated light to moderate alcohol use but my evaluators word stood as the word of God.
More frightening was the director of this rehabs acknowledgment of this. The director who happens to also coincidentally be the evaluator, stated to me as well as to staff on multiple occasions: “ I suggest inpatient treatment for everyone who is reported”. “This is safer for me not to miss anyone who could harm patients, and I figure there must be a reason someone reported them.”
I am still elucidating the reason why I was determined guilty and proven innocent, however I can say from my 90 day stent that the majority of the patients at this rehab needed to be there. This program is saving lives of both providers and patients, however it is destroying the lives of those wrongfully accused.
Chapter 4 your lisense rehab or jail : Upon arivil I was sent to a detox hospital underwent a medical examination and was “one of the lucky ones” who required no detoxification and could report directly to PHP. Like everyone else, I spent 90 days in a PHP, being as 6-10 weeks is simply a lie they tell patients to decrease the change of resisting the treatment. When discussing the topic one therapist sated “if we told patients 90 days they would never come.” She then attempted to justify the treatment by outlining the story of a patient she had called who “didn’t make it to treatment” and killed themselves”. It is my belief that it is not the lack of PHP which impelled such professionals to take their life, but them realizing that they now will be obliged to undergo 90 days of PHP, 5 years of PRN monitoring with a loss of autonomy and hundreds of thousands of dollars taken from them that induced their hopelessness. For even if these professionals were truly mentally unstable in their addictions, in every case it was only following a phone call where they were informed they must undergo treatment that they took their life’s. By this time I still haven’t the slightest clue what PRN was.
Despite the security these programs provide for many my 6 main issues with them can be summarized in : 1. Kick backs: evaluators are directors of treatment clinics 2. The reported are guilty till proven innocent 3. The price, the overflow of money these places drag in from both patients and state universities is appalling, they charge separately for every visit and test 4. Although they make the claim that they are individualized, they are anything but. Every patient gets the same stay and treatment from the doctor drunk on the job and the one who was late to a shift 5. They force voluntary treatment. remember that friendly evaluator who promised he had your best interest at heart, so you opened up and told him everything about your substance use/ developmental / family history, well if you don’t stay for 90 days he will be “normally obliged” to tip the board of medical off to you.

1. The programs have overstepped their intended jurisdiction. -these programs work well if they function how they were intended at their inception. Cite original purpose. Originally these programs were designed to protect physicians and civilians from impaired practitioners; being healthcare workers who were impaired at work. Over the years, these organizations have extended their authority to encompass individuals with substance use disorders When not at work and also those who are in training to become healthcare professionals. Take for example myself compared to a physician who is impaired at work. A doctor who arrived for duty under the influence would surely benifit from the extensive testing, therapy and accountability enforced via these programs. In accordance the 20,000$ per year cost is appropriate when only making up roughly 7% of their yearly salary vs nearly half of a residents. In my case with my loss of income from employment, coast of treatment and monitoring, this year I will be required to pay 20,000$ to work. Yes, I will be losing money to work. Even if did indeed have a substance use disorder this level of monitoring wouldn’t not be considered appropriate.

Dispite all of the miscomings of this System My time spend in PHP was indeed helpful, as I believe it would be for anyone. Time for exercise, a reprieve from work and weekly counseling. A sample structure of my day to day schedule is provided below for insight:
Structure The general structure of these rehabitation centers is as follows: 1. One week of orientation phase, where you are not allowed in electronics or contact with the outside world world. Therefore, if you’re going, bring some things you would like to read or study. 2. In phase 2, you can use your phone however you cannot leave campus. You must stay in the dorm on campus. These shitty 1 room run down apartments with two other roommates will cost you about $1000 a week, they are required for at least four weeks and they are billed separately, no insurance will help you out here. 3. In phase 3 you can commute to campus if you beg your therapist and live very close. Whether you’re on campus or living off-campus, you are allowed to leave up to four hours per day. If you commute, you’ll be required to take a sober link decide you must Breath, alcohol test into every 6 hours. Like everything else in this program you must pay for this separately, a few hundred dollars a week. You advanced to other phases by completing assignments, however, assignments are limited by required built-in time, intrusive, scheduling, and reviewing. Therefore, if you do everything as rapidly as possible phase 1 will take one week phase 2 will take three weeks.
Every day schedule:
7:30: wake up, report to the front desk to inform them that you haven’t ran away yet and take and prescribed medications. They keep all your medications and require that you report to take them; for me this was antidepressants in an attempt to dispel the depression I contracted from being forced into treatment and whatever off label medication they were attempting to treat my ADHD with, since control medications were forbidden.
8 am: community group assessments This consisted of other patients presenting their assignments amongst the large group, on the weekends this was often an hour later and 12 study regularly took the place of assignment presentation.
10 am: process group. This was a two hour group therapy session with 6 to 12 other professionals in a therapist and training or occasionally a licensed mental health therapist.
1 pm: recreation This was generally about an hour of some sober themed craft or activity. Once a week this time slot was used for yoga.
2 pm: this was another time slot used for patients to present assignments as well as for individual therapy sessions. Each patient had one individual therapy session lasting 30 minutes per week.
3pm: This was time allotted to work on assignments or go to the gym on your sex specific scheduled gym day.
5pm: this time was used for guest speakers or another 12 step study group.
6 pm : this was generally an off-campus 12 step group
10 pm: report to the front desk and let them know you still haven’t ran away and take and Medication which are prescribed to take at night, then return to your cot bed in your room with 1-2 other roommates.
I found the community to be one of the most beneficial aspects of the PHP program. I was in a cohort of chill ass professionals of the same occupation who were always there to help each other.
Assignments The curriculum of the PHP consisted of assignment based on every step of the 12th step program. Generally, a patient would be required to complete an assignment on their own, review it with other patients, then faculty and finally present the assignment in front of the whole treatment group. You’re only given one assignment at a time and there are multiple steps to each which all requires scheduling this ensures that no matter how determined a patient is a full 90 days of treatment is required to complete all the assignments.
AA structure -the obsolete nature of AA has been verified in numbers studies, but I will refrain from divulging here and lend that endeavor to Dr. Lance Dodes very thorough discussion on the subject,in “the sober truth “
In all sincerity, if I truely did have a severe use disorder this experience could have been life saving. I only wish I could have used my 50 grand for someone who has spent their life time In addictive without reprieve. My first conversation when I was given my phone back was how I wish my father could be able to attend this PHP.
Chapter 5 reporting and PRN Self reporting What they ask you What you should tell them
There’s a third-party agency called professional resource network. Every state has their own. This agency works as a liaison between you and whatever credentialing service your occupation requires. Essentially they ensure your monitoring after treatment. Stake governments and licensing boards trust them, mainly because they monitor with the highest level of intrusiveness. This alleviates much work for state governments and licensing boards because once an individual is being monitored by a professional resource network, then they are deemed appropriate for duty and no further investigation/litigation needs to occur, as long as the monitored individual completely complies.
Because I was never impaired at work I was never reported to this agency. The general workflow of things someone would report you to professional resource network, then the resource network would contact you, and then you would be required to report for an evaluation at a treatment center, which would inevitably result in a suggestion I’ve treatment at that given treatment center. In my case I was sent to the treatment center without PRN being involved. Thus, two weeks into treatment. I was notified by my therapist that I needed to call PRN and self report. I attempted to resistance given that I did not have a problem and was not individually seeking help. I asked what happened if I didn’t self report. I was told that in order to stay in the treatment program I had to report to PRN. This meant either I report to PRN or I get kicked out of the treatment program and lose my job.
When you report to PRN they will ask you why you are in treatment. They will then list off every substance imaginable, asking you if you have ever tried the substance and when your last use was. Ultimately, they will obtain your discharge information from your treatment center, so it is in your best interest to report only what was found in your biochemical testing. If it wasn’t in your hair, I would argue that you don’t have a use disorder regarding that substance and it’s not relevant. I don’t believe it’s important for them to know that you smoked weed when you were 12.
Chapter 6 The contract:
Before being discharged from a treatment facility, a professional resource network will have you sign a contract. A little known fact which I was oblivious to is that contracts can be negotiated. Though this isn’t it possible, it is highly improbable that you can negotiate your contract since PRN has a power to delay your clearance to return to work.
Contractor almost never personalized, and I have not heard of a contract which is not a five-year agreement. You will sign releases of information so that PRN has access to all of your information which was gathered at the treatment facility. You must have a therapist, psychiatrist, primary care, doctor, and a addiction, medicine psychiatrist. You assign releases of information for all of them. You will be required To commit to: 1. three mutual aid meetings a week which you must log. I log smart recovery meetings. 2. Weekly therapy sessions with an approved mental health therapist from their list 3. Monthly doctors appointments with an addiction medicine psychiatrist 4. Yearly appointments with a primary care physician 5. Monthly appointments with a psychiatrist 6. Daily check-ins on a random drug testing app ( you will agree to weekly urine tests, a peth test 4 times a year, a hair test twice a year and a little caveat that says anything else they deem, clinically reasonable) 7. Quarterly update reports which you are required to obtain from a workplace monitor, therapist, addiction, medicine, psychiatrist, primary care physician and any other doctor you are seeing. 8. You must upload all of your prescriptions into a mobile application every single time you get them refilled and are not allowed to take them until they are approved. 9. Attendance of a PRN group via zoom. This is a local group you are assigned along with other monitored practitioners. There is a fee of roughly 130$ a month to attend this required group. For me all of these requirements coast around 20,000 a year. If you ever have a positive test even if it is the result of contamination from rubbing alcohol or unintentional ingestion of alcohol/ allergy medication your contract will rest to 5 years from the time of positive test. Once your five year contract is completed, you must ask to be released from monitoring. At that point they will search for any reason to keep you under monitoring. This could be dilute urines, daily check ins or a week where you did not attend mutual aid meetings. Every certification and license which you apply for will likely ask you if you were under a monitoring program/ have been treated for substance use. You must give an explanation and check yes. As far as licensing programs are concerned, if you were under the monitoring of PRN, you are safe, however they group practitioners who have had behavioral issues with practitioners who were diverting drugs from work. Therefore, keep in mind that you will be labeled as a sever addict.
7 Back to work and only work. During treatment your only goal is to return to work, however when you return your experience will be drastically distinct from what you remember. For me, I was now working in isolation. Missing six months of my training meant that no other Resident was on the same rotation as me. My coworkers at all formed friend groups. When I returned I was greeted with much concern for my well being. No one would speak to be about my absence, however everyone knew there is only one reason a resident would leave for 6 months then return. My Accdeemic meetings were consisting of attending telling me “I have a target on my back now” and “ I have to preform even better than others” in the light of my time missed. If this wasn’t alienating enough, the majority of Resident events, sponsored by recruiters and my university revolved around alcohol to which I had to give some excuse to why I can not partake with others. I’m fortunate that I do not have an addiction, because these stressful conditions along with the daunting amount of dead and requirements imposed by PRN are enough to make any addict relapse. While I was at treatment, I was in the dative with Samyr stories a physicians whose addictions got the best of them. Physicians who did not make it to treatment, often taking their own life. These stories were presented as a warning. Your addictions will kill you without our treatment was the message. When, in reality I did not hear one story in which the addiction killed physician. Every physician who didn’t make it to treatment took their life after being told they must report to a treatment facility. Perhaps they knew what this entailed and it was not their addiction or getting caught which caused them to end their lives, but the unmanageable and often unreasonable burden that treatment would put on their lives.
9 How to escape So your fucked your in PRN and should be or you should and now your recovered and want to terminated your contract.

1. You ask to be released early done at 1/2 time ( good luck)
2. You have “good reason” (no one has ever been let out of contract because of this reason, the verbiage is far too vague)
3. You serve all your time and they let you out(maybe, as discussed earlier, they would do everything they can to keep you in your contract as long as your practicing)
4. You can’t practice medicine anymore

10 Layer up butter cup : I cannot emphasize the extent to which legal help is required in this process. You much seek it and seek it early. Lawyers can provide many avenues to you early in the process. Once you have committed to treatment, gone for evaluation or are in a PRN contract , this is very little that you or legal help can do. Spend a few thousand dollars when you are accused and save the 20-30,000 later.
After you have been evaluated if you disagree as I did, then this is the process you must undergo. 1. Hire a occupation, defense, lawyer 2. Prove you don’t have an addiction, this is done by having an alternative evaluator with similar credentials state that either you don’t have an addiction or that PRN’s level of monitoring is not medically appropriate ( this will need to be a multi day neuropsychological evaluation, which will cost about $5000). 3. Your lawyer must draft in writing that the medical level of monitoring is not required such as another medical professional and send this to PRN 4. PRN will tattle on you to the board of medicine. 5. The board of medicine will conduct an investigation. 6. At the end or when they believe they have enough reasonable evidence to the board of medicine will suspend your license or claim, you must comply with the PRN contract to practice. 7. At this time your lawyer will defend you in the state court against the board. This is costly but much less than the coast of a 5 year PRN contract 8. If you win you will likely suggest an alternative level of care such as gonna get therapy every week. If you lose, than you wasted a fuck ton of money and are still bound by your PRN contract.
Overall this entire process has coast me Over all coast:
My finances for this year only including PRN and rent are as follows:
120-200$ every week for testing 480-800/ month
65 every week for therapy 195/month
125 every month for PRN group
About 50-69 every month for 2 doctor apts
So at least 745$/month at the lowest
Treatment at the recovery center coast 20,000 for me out of pocket and
I wasn’t payed for 6 months with no FMLA because I am a first year. At the 1 year mark I will have made 26,000 this year after taxes And payed About 29,000 on PRN alone
Rent is 1,000 so that’s 12,000 a year
Just in rent and PRN alone I will be at 26,000- 41,600 -15,600.
I will be in debt by at least 18,000 at the 1 year mark
Coast of treatment center 20,000 (with insurance) For each year of PRN roughly 20,000 Add that to 6 months of attending salary which was delayed due to my treatment time: at least 150,000 Layer coasts along with other evaluations 25,000 Missing 6 months of residency pay 30,000 Coast of 1 year in monitoring: 245,000 Coast of 5 years 325,000
If my case progress to a trail I will require an extra 20,000 in court coasts
Chapter 11 My secondary eval: Dr sushi After I arrived at my treatment center I challenge my evaluation multiple times. Each and every time I was discharged and often accused of alternate mental health/ substance abuse issues to discourage my advances. I was never given the opportunity to undergo alternative assessment, however PRN guidelines state that you can obtain a second option within 7 days of your first. This is a mute point, however, because you will not receive the results of your evaluation until over a week after it is conducted and the second evaluation must be conducted by another PRN hired evaluator of their choosing. During my stay in rehab I contacted PRN multiple times to attempt another evaluation/ legal help. They warned against both stating they were a “waste of money” and “pointless”.
After completing my treatment with the guidance of many addiction, experienced physicians, mental health counselors and psychiatrists recommendations I sought in a secondary evaluation. I chose a highly qualified professional with over 30 years of experience to conduct an extensive neuo psycho social evaluation of me. One that I was sure would be more extensive than the evaluation I received at treatment and more importantly an unbiased evaluation.
The results from my evaluation not only showed that I did not have a substance abuse problem warranting PRN level monitoring, but also that PRN was falling to allow adequate treatment of other conditions such as my ADHD. My evaluation showed my ADHD was not only untreated by PRNs attempt at using non controlled medication, but also in the top 3% most severe presentations of ADHD. My evaluator went on to explain my results by questioning why my treatment center even mandated I undergo neuro cognitive evaluation. The only neurodiverse findings were my IQ, my dyslexia and my ADHD. However, a neuo cognitive examination can be billed separately by treatment centers, therefore they always recommend one.
Chapter 12 Amongst its greed, intrusive nature and faulty accusations, professional recourse network function highly proficiently at the task they were designed to; protective physicians and patients from physicians who are impaired at work. In this domain they save lives, offer second changes and protect the public. When they act beyond their intended jurisdiction by imposing unnecessary monetary demands on practitionersin training, accuse practitioners without proof or act on behavior exemplified outside of a work setting they unjustly and inappropriately attack the week and innocent.
Proposed reform: As a trainee my universities malpractice insurance covers me for mistakes made at work. If a learner mistakenly harms a patient, then the university stands on their behalf. If the learner does something wrong under a teachers direct guidance, then the teacher is at fault. This makes sense logically as well as pragmatically. The state entrusts large amounts of money to hospital systems and universities to train resident physicians. A portion of this money is allocated to malpractice insurance. This should extend to accused impairment.
Suppose a training university was required to cover rehabilitation and monitoring of a resident of whom they claim is impaired. Alternatively they have the option of firing the trainee. This would reduce the number of innocent trainees being accused of impairment, make the process of rehabilitation more fair and provide a better use for tax payer derived dollars, which hospital systems are given to train residents. The truly impaired could still seek help, less false accusations would be made and with the employers having the ability to fire at the moment of impairment, there would be less chance of impairment at work.

I'm currently in Berlin, Germany, and about to be homeless for 2 weeks on the streets. I signed up for a study abroad program from my university, which I just graduated from last semester. I paid the application fee, got picked, paid for my own flight here and back, and then got a scholarship from an alumni couple in the department I got my degree in, and that scholarship paid for the rest of the trip.
I worked my ass off doing research and selling a bunch of my stuff to get the plane tickets because I'm pretty broke. I was excited for this trip because I was accepted into a German university for graduate school and figured I'd get a good introduction to living in Germany, and to be honest, Berlin itself has been great, all the locals I've met have been very nice to me, but my professors and everyone working from my university have been really unprofessional and tricky and now I'm in an unsafe position.** EDIT to add that when I say Friday I mean tomorrow, so I have about 1 day until getting kicked out of the hotel.
Long explanation, skip to the bottom for a TLDR:
Before I even got on a single plane, I found out customer service for my phone carrier and I had a misunderstanding a month ago when I bought my international plan and found out about 3 days in advance that my phone would be a brick here. I told the professor immediately and she said worse case scenario she would help me get a working phone when I landed, since it's kind of needed for basic safety. Just half a day before the first flight, I got bitten by a few deer ticks and said I might also need help scheduling a doctors appointment when I land, because our travel insurance required a working phone number and it was too late for me to make an appointment before my flight. The professor said that was fine and I would be helped with that as well, so I got on the first plane in full confidence.
When I landed, a day passed without either thing being handled, and that was fine by me, but then multiple days passed and the professor kind of just waved it off. I'd started to feel a little unwell and asked the professor to help me find a doctor and she said it was just jetlag.
One of the first days of the program we went to a restaurant, and the seating was a very small reserved room with our entire 20+ cohort in it. I have CPTSD and am claustrophobic and knew immediately that I did not want to sit there, so I asked the professor if she could help me ask the staff request a seat for me in the outside dining area, or, if one wasn't available, that I could just sit outside on a nearby bench and skip dinner. She told me the room was reserved for us and this was on the itinerary so I HAD to sit there, and when I again said I didn't think I could, she demanded I sit there again and condescendingly asked me if I really couldn't or just didn't want to. I started to cry as quietly as possible and then that suddenly made her understand, so we went outside and I explained that, in my opinion, trying to force any adult to do something they're uncomfortable with and have said "No" to is bad enough to me normally, but since I have a disability, it's also ableist. I tried to frame that sentiment in a "I'm sure you didn't mean it this way" kind of way but she still took offence to the criticism and I think that led to the rest of this.
After that happened I was feeling more ill and the professor said, "Oh, do you think it's lyme? Because if it was lyme you'd have a rash. It's probably still jetlag". At this point I said again that I needed some help getting a working phone number and medical advice from a doctor and she told me to take responsibility for myself. I'd bought myself a SIM card but it needed some unexpected trouble shooting and everything was in German (I know some German but only around A2 level and absolutely none is required for this program), so I'd already tried to help myself, and again could not schedule myself an appointment without a working phone.
I asked the professor if she could put her phone number in just to let the appointment scheduling process complete and she said no. I asked if she had any other ideas and she again told me to figure it out. I wound up walking 20 minutes through Berlin alone with no working phone to a doctor's office unannounced, barely able to fill half the sign in sheet and navigate the language barrier, and successfully got the antibiotics I needed and a lyme diagnosis. The nurse even asked why I came alone. Thankfully for me everyone in the doctors office including the doctor was very very nice to me despite the curveball I through them.
Not long after all that the professor sent an email with me cc'd in to the office of international affairs at the university, and the email said, in effect, "This student said they have a disability and can't stick to the itinerary and therefore I think they're not a good fit for this program and should go home." I immediately responded that that wasn't accurate, that I just could not sit inside a restaurant or other very cramped space, etc. Then I figured while I was at it I'd tell them about the total lack of care for my safety or wellbeing here. After sending that email the professor confronted me and tried to pretty much intimidate me into admitting everything was all my fault or something, I honestly have no clue, I think she was just upset and trying to make me feel better somehow. I think my criticism really got to her and made her kind of just hate me and that she wanted to make me make her feelings make sense. No clue honestly.
Anyway, after that the office of international affairs reached back out to me and were acting way nicer than they were when I first enrolled in this program, which felt sus, but I was haggard and miserable and wanted to be able to trust them so I did. They told me if I was considering coming home early for my own health and safety, that I could unenroll that night to make sure the alum who gave me a scholarship would at least be refunded, but that I had to do it that night since it was the last day to drop for a refund. I said I wasn't sure if I wanted to leave the program, and they said if you're considering it unenroll and if you want to stay after further discussion then we can probably just go ahead and re enroll you.
So I did it. The next day I'm scheduled to meet with someone who told me the day or so before that she would be my advocate and that she was there to listen to and represent me, and when I join the zoom meeting, it's her, but also two other people from the international affairs office. They're telling me my return flight has already been scheduled and everything and that they were sending out a person to chaperone me on the flight, because, though it was totally ignored on my flights here, I'd mentioned at the very start of the application process that I'd been a human trafficking victim before and ideally wanted to fly with someone instead of alone. All of this had less than a 24 hour turnaround from me unenrolling.
I realized hours after unenrolling that I don't want to leave the program, I just want to actually be allowed to engage in the program as it was advertised and as it was promised, and that leaving the program, to me, feels like capitulating to the professor being an asshole to me and like removing liability from the university. In short I think I pretty much got tricked into unenrolling. I told them I didn't want to leave early and they told me they already scheduled everything and got a refund for my hotel room, so if I don't take the flight back Friday, I will be homeless on the streets for 2 weeks until the flight that I personally purchased for the 31st, and that since I hit the unenroll button, my housing, health, or safety will no longer be the universities problem after Friday.
So, the fuck do I do with this, ya'll got any advice? I could really use some. Or even just some support haha.
TLDR: Got tricked into hitting unenroll button after damaging professors ego, most likely purposely tricked to absolve the university of responsibility because how the profs were treating me and everything I described probably did make me a liability even if not my fault, but I'm mad and I'm enjoying Berlin and don't want to leave or let the university get away with risking my health and safety multiple times with no apologies.

I'm currently in Berlin, Germany, and about to be homeless for 2 weeks on the streets. I signed up for a study abroad program from my university, which I just graduated from last semester. I paid the application fee, got picked, paid for my own flight here and back, and then got a scholarship from an alumni couple in the department I got my degree in, and that scholarship paid for the rest of the trip.
I worked my ass off doing research and selling a bunch of my stuff to get the plane tickets because I'm pretty broke. I was excited for this trip because I was accepted into a German university for graduate school and figured I'd get a good introduction to living in Germany, and to be honest, Berlin itself has been great, all the locals I've met have been very nice to me, but my professors and everyone working from my university have been really unprofessional and tricky and now I'm in an unsafe position. **EDIT TO ADD, when I say they're trying to make me go home Friday I mean tomorrow, so I have like 1 day until I'm kicked out of the hotel.
Long explanation, skip to the bottom for a TLDR:
Before I even got on a single plane, I found out customer service for my phone carrier and I had a misunderstanding a month ago when I bought my international plan and found out about 3 days in advance that my phone would be a brick here. I told the professor immediately and she said worse case scenario she would help me get a working phone when I landed, since it's kind of needed for basic safety. Just half a day before the first flight, I got bitten by a few deer ticks and said I might also need help scheduling a doctors appointment when I land, because our travel insurance required a working phone number and it was too late for me to make an appointment before my flight. The professor said that was fine and I would be helped with that as well, so I got on the first plane in full confidence.
When I landed, a day passed without either thing being handled, and that was fine by me, but then multiple days passed and the professor kind of just waved it off. I'd started to feel a little unwell and asked the professor to help me find a doctor and she said it was just jetlag.
One of the first days of the program we went to a restaurant, and the seating was a very small reserved room with our entire 20+ cohort in it. I have CPTSD and am claustrophobic and knew immediately that I did not want to sit there, so I asked the professor if she could help me ask the staff request a seat for me in the outside dining area, or, if one wasn't available, that I could just sit outside on a nearby bench and skip dinner. She told me the room was reserved for us and this was on the itinerary so I HAD to sit there, and when I again said I didn't think I could, she demanded I sit there again and condescendingly asked me if I really couldn't or just didn't want to. I started to cry as quietly as possible and then that suddenly made her understand, so we went outside and I explained that, in my opinion, trying to force any adult to do something they're uncomfortable with and have said "No" to is bad enough to me normally, but since I have a disability, it's also ableist. I tried to frame that sentiment in a "I'm sure you didn't mean it this way" kind of way but she still took offence to the criticism and I think that led to the rest of this.
After that happened I was feeling more ill and the professor said, "Oh, do you think it's lyme? Because if it was lyme you'd have a rash. It's probably still jetlag". At this point I said again that I needed some help getting a working phone number and medical advice from a doctor and she told me to take responsibility for myself. I'd bought myself a SIM card but it needed some unexpected trouble shooting and everything was in German (I know some German but only around A2 level and absolutely none is required for this program), so I'd already tried to help myself, and again could not schedule myself an appointment without a working phone.
I asked the professor if she could put her phone number in just to let the appointment scheduling process complete and she said no. I asked if she had any other ideas and she again told me to figure it out. I wound up walking 20 minutes through Berlin alone with no working phone to a doctor's office unannounced, barely able to fill half the sign in sheet and navigate the language barrier, and successfully got the antibiotics I needed and a lyme diagnosis. The nurse even asked why I came alone. Thankfully for me everyone in the doctors office including the doctor was very very nice to me despite the curveball I through them.
Not long after all that the professor sent an email with me cc'd in to the office of international affairs at the university, and the email said, in effect, "This student said they have a disability and can't stick to the itinerary and therefore I think they're not a good fit for this program and should go home." I immediately responded that that wasn't accurate, that I just could not sit inside a restaurant or other very cramped space, etc. Then I figured while I was at it I'd tell them about the total lack of care for my safety or wellbeing here. After sending that email the professor confronted me and tried to pretty much intimidate me into admitting everything was all my fault or something, I honestly have no clue, I think she was just upset and trying to make me feel better somehow. I think my criticism really got to her and made her kind of just hate me and that she wanted to make me make her feelings make sense. No clue honestly.
Anyway, after that the office of international affairs reached back out to me and were acting way nicer than they were when I first enrolled in this program, which felt sus, but I was haggard and miserable and wanted to be able to trust them so I did. They told me if I was considering coming home early for my own health and safety, that I could unenroll that night to make sure the alum who gave me a scholarship would at least be refunded, but that I had to do it that night since it was the last day to drop for a refund. I said I wasn't sure if I wanted to leave the program, and they said if you're considering it unenroll and if you want to stay after further discussion then we can probably just go ahead and re enroll you.
So I did it. The next day I'm scheduled to meet with someone who told me the day or so before that she would be my advocate and that she was there to listen to and represent me, and when I join the zoom meeting, it's her, but also two other people from the international affairs office. They're telling me my return flight has already been scheduled and everything and that they were sending out a person to chaperone me on the flight, because, though it was totally ignored on my flights here, I'd mentioned at the very start of the application process that I'd been a human trafficking victim before and ideally wanted to fly with someone instead of alone. All of this had less than a 24 hour turnaround from me unenrolling.
I realized hours after unenrolling that I don't want to leave the program, I just want to actually be allowed to engage in the program as it was advertised and as it was promised, and that leaving the program, to me, feels like capitulating to the professor being an asshole to me and like removing liability from the university. In short I think I pretty much got tricked into unenrolling. I told them I didn't want to leave early and they told me they already scheduled everything and got a refund for my hotel room, so if I don't take the flight back Friday, I will be homeless on the streets for 2 weeks until the flight that I personally purchased for the 31st, and that since I hit the unenroll button, my housing, health, or safety will no longer be the universities problem after Friday.
So, the fuck do I do with this, ya'll got any advice? I could really use some. Or even just some support haha.
TLDR: Got tricked into hitting unenroll button after damaging professors ego, most likely purposely tricked to absolve the university of responsibility because how the profs were treating me and everything I described probably did make me a liability even if not my fault, but I'm mad and I'm enjoying Berlin and don't want to leave or let the university get away with risking my health and safety multiple times with no apologies. Currently will probably be homeless in Berlin for 2 weeks.

Ove the last few months I've been doing some work to try and understand the extreme anxiety I have been experiencing which is 9/10 triggered between dates.
This is less about her and more about me and my neediness, past traumas catching up to me, hypervigilance to any small sign of a potential drop in attraction etc. That being said she is not the most needy or expressive girl I've ever dated. Before anyone immediately assumes that's some sign of a lack of attraction or an indicator of low interest - I have experienced girlfriends who are needy and will constantly love bomb and be in contact expressing their undying love for you, right up until they put their phone down to cheat on you with the guy they invited over behind your back... so no, i dont think measuring texts is a wise way of measuring their interest....yes, I'm sure I have trust issues, yes this has affected my ability to stay calm and relaxed. But the point I'm trying to make is that this isn't about HER making me uncomfortable. It's MY anxiety at play and I'm trying to sort through that.
9/10 when I have shared a text exchange I've had with her to someone familiar with ccw they tell me I must be confused because her messages are anything but dry, she is the one reaching out 9/10, she is the one pushing to see me 8/10 and inviting herself over. But there are uncertainties surrounding the relationship (as is totally normal to some degree, you never have full certainty) which seem to be amplified in my head when she is taking longer to respond, seeming a bit more dry, being even just slightly less affectionate in return to something I've said etc.
By this point, the subject of the anxiety is probably at question... it's fundamentally all revolving around texting. I'll be totally fine after we have seen eachother and then she reaches out and my brain does backflips trying to decode the meaning of her messages, what does she want? Did I say enough? Did I say too little? Is she losing interest? Is this all just a lie? Why does she seem so disinterested/sure of herself?
I can't read the tone, I can't see her facial expressions - and I always have the awareness in my mind that I might say something and not get a response for hours and sometimes it's even been days (unless I'm asking a specific question), in which case I just keep matching and mirroring and sometimes being spontaneous too. If I sense low effort I back off... if I sense her wanting my attention and validation I give a little and then try close the conversation. I know this is where I'm supposed to set a date or invite her over but experience with her has told me that she is not necessarily trying to make immediate plans by reaching out and we have a bit of a pattern where I tend to make more legitimate dates and she invites herself over during the week after work so I don't think I'm "missing an opportunity" or something. I think she just wants some of my presence in these moments.
There seems to be no clean etiquette around texting... you can "end" an exchange but there are no rules about how to end it, how to restart it, who should be restarting it etc. I really despise the pressure cooker that is texting. When we are together things are really good.... and then bam! Texts come and I'm back to this state of mind. Every text feels like a loaded gun in which I may miss or hit the target. If I don't respond, I have the NEED to respond in the back of my head, or following me like a dark shadow. If I haven't received a response I go into fight or flight panic mode waiting for a truck to hit me. It's so over the top.
I know this is extreme overthinking but that is where I am at. Let me try give an example of an anxiety inducing episode I'm experiencing now:
She messages, I message back, we make plans for weekend, she says something playful, I tell her something playful but sweet, she responds with a playful and sweet message (no questions or clear indication it requires a response) and it's late at night.... so I think to myself "ill respond tomorrow"
Tomorrow was yesterday and I realised I just have no energy to say anything in return... the more time went by the less natural a response would have seemed, then I thought maybe I could send her something else random if I came across it just so she doesn't feel "ignored" but I never came across anything not did I feel like it. I just had nothing and no energy to text her back.... it stresses me out feeling as if I'm being cold or that she might stubbornly get butt hurt by this. But what's crazy is that she has initiated silence like this before and it sends me spinning out.
Guys this sounds crazy enough, I am aware that this is ridiculous, that I'm supposed to not even have the energy or time to focus on shit like this but that's why I'm calling it anxiety and not just fear, it's totally irrational and overwhelming - I'm not stupid, or ill informed - just possessed by these thoughts and feelings that something must be resolved so I can relax again.
I guess if I had to turn this post into some questions they would be:
Is it fair of me to not want to text? Is it okay to be the one who goes quiet and non responsive or should we always leave the ball in their court? Am I doing the right thing by not forcing myself to keep communication going despite being overwhelmed? Should I focus solely on our time together?
What are some blind spots I might be missing due to my confusion/exhaustion? What standa out from what I've said?
EDIT: I forgot to add that sometimes I also just feel like I need space to get my head right or focus on other things going on in my life - and I just don't have the energy to keep making sure I'm saying enough/just enough/being attractive enough/not missing cues etc.... it is totally draining me and I don't understand why?