LIBRA ZODIAC PREDICTIONS MAY 2024

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I love my mummy. She grew me from her insides, encased by the flesh that we share. She nourished me with the liquid pulsing through her rotten body. Together we play games, mummy shows me how to make dolls from the scraps of daddy’s meat, pretty girl dolls with long floppy limbs that reek of decay. I don’t like mummy after the sun goes down. She tells me we can’t make dolls anymore, tells me my dolls are stupid. At night I hide. I have to find a different hiding spot tonight; mummy found my last one at sunrise. I can see the claw marks from when she found me in the linen cupboard. Long nails attached to long fingers, penetrating the cheap wooden door until there was nothing but torn up paint and inch deep fleshless lacerations.
The sun is setting. The final flash of orange sky and her eyes will gloss over like daddy’s did when mummy found him. Wet film slicked over green ovals of empty rage. She still looks like mummy, only her mouth is a tight line that reaches from ear to ear and it can’t open very well. It’s all muffled words now. Mummy looks like a tree after the sun sets. Her arms and her legs grow longer, they get too heavy so she hunches over. I am going to hide under her bed. Daddy’s bulge is hidden under there. Mummy keeps it a secret, but I know. Her bed is thin and much too long and her black hair is tangled up in the sheets. The scent of her sweat stained cushion lingers into my nostrils and down to my lungs as I crawl under, deeper into the dark stinking pit at the center.
I see the warm shadows from the final seconds of sun dance through the handmade curtains at her window. Mummy took the skin off daddy’s body to make those. His bellybutton, still attached to his torso skin, looks like a little crystal in the golden light. The pretty shadows disappear, and the room is black. I can hear mummy looking for me. She’s laughing through that muffled slit on her face. There is death in her eyes and a tremor in her shrieking that makes me nervous. She is angry now. I wasn’t in the linen cupboard this time. I am too smart for her.
I curl in on myself in the safety of the dark and wiggle my loose teeth in waiting. The nights are slow because I cannot sleep. I never sleep. Mummy is still running around the house looking for me, grunts of anticipation much louder, much more feral, than any wild animal. A pool of blood starts to swirl under my head where a loose tooth has fallen. Not good. Mummy smells blood as much as she craves it. The door creaks open. Two long feet stand still in the doorway, toes curling from excitement at the scent of her baby’s blood. I pray I do not end up as curtains and dolls like daddy. Mummy is on the bed; she is digging up the insides of her mattress. Maybe if I stay still enough, she won’t find me. I want to be brave, like daddy was.
I roll onto my back, there's a big hole in the mattress above my head. My eyes take seconds to adjust to the darkness above before I see Mummy’s dewy eyes beaming into mine. “My baby is here” the tight line where her mouth has been stretched starts to open slightly and she drools on me through her words. Her hand pokes through the slats in the bed and she pinches my cheeks until blood pours out. “We need more dolls, baby. We need this skin”. Warm water leaks from my eyes onto the tips of her fingers where blood gushes. She draws her hand away and I feel her tugging at my feet, grunting like an impatient child. I cannot kick, for her fingers reach from her palms to my thighs. I am paralyzed in her grip, and I let her pull me out from under my final hiding spot. I am dragged by my blood-stained hair to the backyard where mummy likes to play.
“Mummy is thirsty, baby? You can’t keep all that blood. You’re not selfish”
Her muffled words are comprehensible enough to foresee the fate at which I am now destined for. I am here to feed her, to fuel her life, as she once did me. In the way shadows chase the light, how the moon must always put the sun to rest, birth must give way to death. In turn I must give life, my flesh and bone, to the creator of my life and my light. To return to the darkness that will always encompass her. it is her right.

A/N: This incorporates a new build, with additional drawbacks and perks. I added a few gamer functions, as well as Lightning Quick, Brute Strength, DPS, and Rogue. More details are available over on Spacebattles (I also edited the original chapters there to reflect the changes).
Within minutes of entering the building and clocking in, I'm speedily typing away at my computer. There are stacks of papers on my desk that I am dedicatedly transcribing and digitizing.
This is my job, at least on most days. I have to take sheets of paper, invariably assorted forms related to insurance, and digitize them. In minutes I have already done this to a few different types of forms, from applications to the paperwork regarding claims and investigations into claims. "Speed Typist" mixed with "Lightning Quick" allows me to easily breeze through even dense forms and shift between the programs I need to use for each type of form. My job is hilariously, almost offensively, easy and I have already heard that we have a backlog so I have plenty of stuff to go through.
As I type I begin to think about each of my gamer perks as well as my system. Every few minutes I'll "mistype" thanks to "Buggy" and I'll spend a split second going back and fixing my mistake but between "The Devil's Own Luck" and "Lightning Quick" I'm able to fix my mistakes in a span of milliseconds. While I type I use "Observe" every instance I can, throwing in a tiny burst to the overall amount of experience I gain.
I use my enhanced mind's passive ability to follow two trains of thought while I work. As far as anyone can tell I'm diligently doing my job, but in actuality I'm exploring my system. Through passive, almost imperceptible gestures, mostly due to how fast they are, I am messing around with my rather system.
I whittle away the hours I need to spend at my job doing this. During this time I get a few of my skills to level up a few times, thanks to my decision to faithfully and diligently hone some of my other abilities like "Observe". Eventually lunch rolls around and Amy sneaks up behind me so she can surprise me and draw me away from my work. I feign surprise when she reaches me up and taps on my shoulder, and this is a perfect chance for me to try something out.
I make small talk and I silently activate my ability to pause reality while I'm in the middle of a sentence. The world freezes around me and I get to see Amy freeze as she reacts to what I'm saying. I have a reason for doing this, it's all for the sake of experimenting with some of my more intriguing abilities.
I focus on Amy even as I interact with my system's UI and I activate my "Gacha" mechanic. In my mind's eye I can see a logo representing a capsule machine beginning to stir to life and spin some of the capsules containing various awards, and I think about two enormously powerful perks: "The Face" and "Silver Tongue".
These two charisma enhancing perks are incredibly valuable tools in my repertoire and I have yet to meaningfully use them. One of them, "Silver Tongue" is not as directly powerful as "The Face" but it offers me broad knowledge of psychology, enhances my charismatic intuition, and makes me incredibly attractive. The real powerhouse of a perk is "The Face". By focusing on people and thinking of something I want them to believe or persuade them to do I have a supernatural intuitive sense that allows me to know the best sort of argument I could make to achieve that goal. To test this I study Amy while wondering if there's any way for me to convince her to go on a date with me, and after a split second of thinking I begin to feel vague intuitive senses of what I could say and do that would make her see me as a potential romantic interest, and I know that doing that before I ask her out would guarantee success if I wanted her to go on a date with me.
I immediately shift tactics and try to see if I could persuade her to give me 100,000 dollars, and I am unsurprised when I do not gain any vague sensations about how to make that happen one way or another. "Worth a shot..." I tell myself, and if I could smile more I would. Both of these perks are strong, but I'm clever enough to recognize that they become even stronger when I add "Beautiful Mind" and "Well of Wisdom" to the mix. WoW is especially handy in a combination like this, since it allows me to pick and choose the most efficient route to my desired outcome. This is especially true if I mix it with my ability to pause time, since I can give myself breathing room and contemplate how to most skillfully word my arguments and present my positions.
The gacha machine, or some abstraction of one, in my head slows to a stop. When it does a symbol of a capsule pops out and I am delighted to see that I've won a mundane iPad like device, a handy thing I can use as a computer for the time being! This is quite handy, and I can see this particular mechanic becoming something life-saving in a moment of desperation with the right amount of luck. The decide immediately fills a slot in my inventory, and I make a mental note to pull it out and use it later.
I unpause time and over the course of the next few minutes I use my skills, mixing all of the aforementioned perks and functions of my gamer skills as Amy and I walk over to the cafeteria. It is only when we're sitting through the door into the cafeteria that I sense an opportunity to ask my friend something.
"Hey, do you want to try a soup I made? I like it but having a second opinion is always good." I remark, causing her eyes to brightly light up. I grin at her and we walk over to the same table we ate at yesterday. I hand her the small container I'm holding my soup in, and she looks at it. I see her inhale and watch as her eyes light up. We're the first of the people to arrive at our table so no one else sees this. The container I gave her also has some silverware which she uses to go ahead and take a sip of the soup. I am delighted when time freezes and I get a notification alerting me to the acquisition of a new class: that of a chef. I immediately equip it even as I click through the drawback that appears before me. This also confirms that at least in some cases what is needed for me to get a class is for me to do stuff in front of others or at least involve them in some way.
As time resumes I see Amy's face light up.
"This is delicious!" She states with a delighted and sincere grin. I light up as she tells me this and I lightly cheer. This is excellent news, and my acquisition of this class is very fascinating. When it comes to classes I have a unique ability to get them to "Prestige" once they reach a high enough level, and given my current build's focus on support, buffing, and healing, if I can master a class like that of a chef I can do a lot.
"I'm so happy you like it!" I exclaim, sincerely. It really does taste quite good, but my whole body is enhanced and I'm superhumanly sensitive to things like taste so there's no guarantee that what I taste will be what others taste. That said, cooking is an absolutely incredible skill so if I can master it... Well, I'll always be able to prove my worth in almost any situation involving other people. Cooking... is a cracked skill to have in real life.
Our friends join us and as they do Amy turns to them and hands one of the women the container. Mary looks at us quizzically and Amy pantomimes for her friend to try the soup. Mary's look of confusion only becomes more apparent, but she still dutifully does as she's been asked, using her own silverware to do so. Her eyes light up as well and I feel how much experience I have as a cook slowly increase, which brings a smug smile to my face.
"This is delicious! What is this?!" Mary asks, and I grin and point at me. She smiles, impressed, before handing it back to me.
"I made this soup last night. I liked it but I didn't know if I was going crazy or not." I remark, and that gets a laugh out of Amy.
"Well, if working at an office ever gets boring you could make a living as a chef. This is amazing!" She states, and I can hear the honesty in her voice. It's kind of nice how much she likes the stuff, and a part of me wouldn't mind making more food for her if she's gonna be this enthusiastic about what I give her to eat.
It's hard not for me not to beam at my companions in passive delight the whole time we're eating lunch. The lunchroom conversation is kept simple and we simply inform each other about upcoming plans and light gossip, all of which I've heard before thanks to my enhanced, and growing, senses. Super Sensory is a strong enough perk by default but because of my ability to expand every facet of myself, coupled with the universality of "Master of All" I am just passively growing in my ability to hear stuff. Seeing as I am uncapped I could see myself someday hearing every conversation in this building, almost certainly by the end of the year given how all of my growth is linked together and builds on each other.
Lunch comes and goes in a blur and in minutes I'm back in front of the computer. In front of the computer I'm a blur, my fingers strengthened by Lightning Quick and Speed Typist. I whittle away the hours diligently doing my job, distracting myself and minorly doing other things by making use of my dual trains of thought, and even when I overcome instances of "Buggy" every few minutes I still find myself grateful that I took the drawbacks I did. This work would be... less than fun otherwise. By the time my workday comes to an end and I find myself outside of the office I've filled out hundreds of forms and diligently pushed various skills of mine to new levels. Colleagues of mine are walking around me and also leaving the office. I casually pause time. making use of my pause ability again, and I begin to think of what to do and where to go next.
"I suppose now's as good a time as any to go and see about volunteering..." I eventually realize as I think about the various things I can do from here. I momentarily wonder where I should go to try and do that before I remember what I told Amy and the others yesterday about how I volunteered at a clinic. WIth Healer volunteering at a hospital would be good for me, even if I couldn't do as much good as I'd like too since I am not a doctor. I unpause time and smile as I reach into my pocket, use "Inventory" and retrieve my cellphone.
"Where is the nearest hospital?" I ask aloud, into the phone. Some of the people walking past me glance at me curiously and I smile sheepishly as my phone begins to tell me where to go. I begin to walk in the direction the phone indicates, happy to have a chance to begin to do some good.
The walk isn't terribly long. It turns out that the hospital is in a part of downtown that I didn't explore last night, and I reach it less than five minutes after I start walking, just in the opposite direction of where I was going before. The hospital isn't huge, which surprises me since I don't seem to be living in some small town but in a decently sized city. I walk into the main entrance and step into a large lobby where a decent amount of foot traffic seems to happen, judging from the footprints I can faintly see on the floor beneath me. I walk up to a receptionist desk and the man behind it doesn't bother looking up and instead taps the clipboard in front of him. I glance at it and laugh when I see that it's a standard questionnaire for people who are visiting a hospital for normal, health-related reasons. My reaction surprises the man, and to be fair it's definitely odd for someone in a hospital to laugh at the sight of a hospital questionnaire.
I am laughing at the questionnaire because it's amusing to think about the possibility of getting sick, I'm a gamer, and while normally that'd conjure images of nerds and geeks in my case it means that my health is protected. I have two very powerful perks/features that wildly mitigate the dangers of sicknesses: "Tough As Nails" which guarantees that it'd take something supernatural or almost supernatural to stand a chance of even slowing me down, and "Gamer Body". Gamer Body is interesting in this context since it gamifies negative conditions and allows me to, quite literally, sleep them off. Even something like losing a limb can be cured with a night of sleep thanks to my abilities which feels radically overpowered given how little it cost. I have other perks which further lower my odds of being negatively affected by sicknesses, such as "The Devil's Own Luck". I also have my magic, which includes spells that completely heal and purify the body, and would work on me just as readily as they'd work on other people.
"I'm actually here to learn how to volunteer? I'm new in town and I used to volunteer at a clinic in my home town so I wanted to see if I could volunteer here." I explain, which causes the guy to look up at me. When he does his eyes widen, and I smile awkwardly. I consider feigning ignorance, or perhaps innocence, but I know what's going on. He wasn't expecting me to look the way I look.
My new looks are something it is taking me a beat to get used to. I was only okay looking before, but now my looks are hyper idealized, and I am a conceptually handsome version of the very best I could have ever looked, and it is a bit jarring. It's more jarring for me, knowing that before I was an at best average-looking guy before coming to this world and gaining this new form. I allow the man a beat, before I clear my throat and the sound snaps him out of the daze he was in.
"Oh! Sorry, man, I just assumed you were sick. Umm... Yeah, let me give you a packet." The man says, before reaching under the desk in front of him. I smile lightly as he rummages around the interior of the space that separates us.
My powerful senses allow me to easily notice all sorts of stuff occurring around me. I can hear the vital processes in the bodies of the people closest to me, such as heartbeats and the smells of sweat, as well as other bodily fluids. Many of the people in this area of the hospital are sick, and truthfully if I could I'd heal them all.
One of my reasons for coming here today is to give myself a means by which I can help and heal people. This is, mildly, altruistic but more than anything else I want to master the power to heal people before I leave this setting. In the right setting, being a healer is absolutely a pivotal method of interacting with my environment and also getting allies, as well as staying alive.
The man eventually hands me a packet, along with a pen to use to fill out parts of it, and I smile at him as I take it. It is filled with information, including an application to fill out, and I thank him as I walk over to the waiting area and begin to fill it out. The questions are simple and ask for basic information about me. I fill it out, though a part of me is curious how this'll mesh with my drawbacks...
When I finish filling out the form I hand it to the man and he gratefully takes it. He explains that I'll be contacted by someone named "Ms. Jimenez" soon, and that she oversees the volunteer program. I delightedly thank him for that information and begin to head out of the hospital.
In minutes I'm part of the way home. I am a decently fast walker, though that's something I'd like to work on more in the days to come. The sun is quickly descending, and the moon is already visible in the night sky. I'm approaching the row of apartment buildings that include the building I live in. As I draw nearer and nearer to it I spot a lone homeless man sleeping next to one of the apartments. He is clearly asleep and my observation ability only confirms this. It also reveals that the man is sick, and when I glance at his hit points I see further confirmation of that, as he's down a few of them. I am walking towards him, and as I move I see a nice opportunity for me to try something.
I silently activate "Rogue", one of my more odd perks, and I feel my presence become much more subdued and difficult to notice. I approach the man, and I shut my eyes. As I walk towards him I allow myself to be guided by Super Sensory and only stop when I'm right in front of the man. I kneel and I focus on my spellbook icon, allowing me to see my list of spells. My senses allow me to be confident that the figure is still asleep when I gently move my hands so that they are in front of him. Time freezes as I gain a "Stealth" skill, and while time is frozen I swap my class and become a mage so I can gain valuable experience before I deactivate "Tutorial Sprite". I allow time to resume and smile as I trigger a spell for the first time, one of healing.
For me to activate the spell requires nothing more than for me to have enough magic points and an applicable target. This particular spell is my more advanced spell and it can work on all sorts of living targets. It is named "Intermediate heal" and the fact that I have it is a sign of one of my purchases; Healer. I feel my points of arcane energy be converted into sacred, restorative energy and I open my eyes in time to watch my hands begin to glow as energy leaves me and enters him. I look at his hit points and watch them begin to slowly increase even as I hit him with another instance of "Observe". I do so just in time to feel time freeze as new notifications appear in my mind's eye. One of the first notifications is that I have just earned experience for the "Mage" class, which becomes experience for everything thanks to Master of All, while another indicates that I've just unlocked a quest to become a healer! I study these notifications with a proud grin as this marks an important milestone in my journey. The fact that the class I want is locked behind a quest is interesting and I make a mental note to study the quest as I head home.
I unfreeze time, notice that the man is already visibly healthier, and turn to make my way back to my new home. It takes only about six minutes before I find myself stepping into my apartment. Now I can play with my new toy from earlier!

Feeling lost. I just came back to pick up Skyrim, and the game updated to what is like 1.1160 something like that? I last played at 1.6.640. I tried rolling it back through steam console but all my mods are still broken. So I’ve given up on that removed all my mods kept my rolled back Skyrim and installed the right version of SKSE and now the game is bugged to hell (even the loading intro the camera has me stuck inside the horse carriage lmao) should I just take the L and go to the new update ?

Injustice is intolerable to the human. By his nature, Prince Regen disobeyed his father, Lord Sard, who was master of exports on Astragoth, second in power only to the planetary minister, the emperor's own nephew Anj Kurim. Perhaps how Prince Regen became son to Anj Kurim is a tale too bold to ever be repeated, for it dares the instinct of man to do right or wrong, the hearts of the young to fall in love from mere eye contact and the honor of the knights who braved the arena on the tournament of Easter. A tale too bold, but I'd go mad to keep it all to myself:
The lords in question were the three barons of slag on Astragoth who commanded the planetary production of mech armor alloys, Astragoth's most valuable export. The types are well known, Bronze-Steel, Silver-Steel and Gold-Steel, although none of those alloys contain any such metals, they are named poetically, rather than literally. Lord Sard grew quite suspicious of them, or perhaps jealous. He had them summoned, stripped, beaten and arrested, accusing them of crimes against his office. His next order of business was to have their estates seized.
Normally such a moment would be conducted honorably through a Trial of Combat, but since these men were severe mech knights, Lord Sard chose caution over honor. His son was not such a coward, and witnessing the atrocity, he fought his way into the holding compound in light armor without markings, but only so the guards would not die withholding their attacks. Regen considered dying honorably to be more important than shielding himself with his identity. When he had rescued the three lords, he did turn himself in, for he took responsibility for his actions.
Lord Sard was furious and had his son exiled. Regen was sent into the frontiers of Astragoth with only his fine robes, a horse, some supplies and a servant named Igor. Igor was quite corrupt, and when they were out in the wilderness he shot Regen in the back of his head when the prince was bathing in a stream, and left him there face down in the water, believing he had killed him. Letting nothing go to waste, Igor took everything, the clothes, supplies, horse and even the prince's identity, managing to assume the prince's identity.
Regen was not dead. By a miracle he'd survived, and the gunshot attracted a retired combat medic who fought in the Scratch Wars and had seen much worse than a naked, drowned man with a gunshot wound in his head. She easily patched him up, rolling the cosmic dice with critical precision. It was not enough for Regen to have his memory intact, as he had severe amnesia.
By instinct he was still very honorable and brave, and pleased with this, he was made apprentice to the one who'd saved his life. She taught him how to care for the kinds of injuries the locals came to her with, and in time he grew wise in the ways of medicine and he worked hard, volunteering to help anyone who needed his strength.
One day he came to the main star port of Astragoth, travelling in the world and seeking his fortune. The daughter of Anj Kurim, Lili, was getting married soon. The whole city was in a state of celebration and three days of games were declared, in which mech knights would duel for the honor of Princess Lili's favor. No mech knight who wasn't willing to risk death would dare step into a close-range combat in the Phoenix Dome, as the impressive arena of Astragoth was called then.
Regen put his only coin into the coffer of the richest man on the planet and bought a ticket to the games. The likelihood that he'd be seated so that Princess Lili could not take her eyes off of him was only the whim of such stars. She'd seen him there and something was different about this man than any she'd ever seen. Some part of her had sailed through the ethers at the dawn of time, and he was her other half, torn from her when she was born as a human on Astragoth. That's how the Princess described the feeling.
Regen glanced across the crowd and met her gaze. He felt like his world began that day, at that moment, as though suddenly every detail of his life became relevant. It was all so he'd be at ~Bed, Bath and Beyond~, right there in the Phoenix Dome as an eight-meter-tall fusion-powered battle armor mech walked out the gates spraying steam at thirteen hundred degrees Celsius from its flamers.
The opposite gate opened but there was no other mech. A weird silence fell over the crowd. It wasn't uncommon for someone to forfeit, anything could go wrong. There was a challenge issued, not as though any unexpected contestants ever answered it. Yet this time a mech in full bronze-alloy armor did enter Phoenix Dome. Nobody knew who it was, and when the newcomer won the battle, they left without claiming the victory.
On the second day, the new husband of the Princess Lili was revealed, and the games would be in his honor as well. He was Prince Regen, except it was really Igor, having assumed Prince Regen's identity. When the combatants were about to fight a third mech entered the arena, this time in silver-alloy armor. He fought both enemies at once and defeated them. Again, before claiming the victory, the mech knight left the arena.
Lord Anj Kurim had a battalion of mech painted in white and decorated with garlands surrounding the arena on the third day. No more intrusions and dishonorable departures. The insults on the first two days by mysterious mech knights could only be surpassed by the games of the final day.
No mech knight had the courage on the third day. Anj Kurim worried this was worse and relayed to the mech commander of the wedding games detail to allow any rogue mech knights in, deciding it couldn't be worse than no games at all.
When the mech knight in the gold-alloy came around the corner and spotted the battalion guarding the arena, he did not know they were ordered to let him past. He charged at them, firing his weapons and they scattered. The holo displays in Phoenix Dome showed this exchange, emphasizing the damage to the government-owned superstructure, cashing in on each chunk of concrete sheared away by laser fire.
The gold-alloy mech stood in the arena alone. Someone had hijacked the holo displays and suddenly they showed the face of just one man in the crowd, and as he looked up he recognized himself. It was all coming back to him in a flood of memories.
The other two mech from the previous games entered, the bronze-alloyed and silver-alloyed. They stood side by side, having found Prince Regen in the crowd and turned their mech to face him.
"Open your cockpits and reveal yourselves." They were ordered by Lord Anj Kurim.
They were the three lords Regen had set free so long ago.
"Honor the Princess!" they were told and they did.
"Now the Prince!' but they saluted the man on the holo display instead of Igor. Lord Anj Kurim saw that Igor was terrified. He drew his sword and beheaded Igor on the spot, his blood spraying all over the booth, and Princess Lili was barely able to escape the gore.
The real Prince Regen was married to the Princess Lili, and the remains of Igor were tossed to the dirt floor of the arena and left there. Soon Regen inherited Lord Anj Kurim's position and had his father's power stripped from him and he gave the three lords back their old homes.
And the armor? What alloys are we even talking about? Some say the bronze is infused with courage, to do what is right even when it is very dangerous and to overcome fear in order to act. Some say silver is imbued with the holiness of love, how it causes miracles, drives us to our destiny and opens the locked doors of fate. And gold? Gold stands for honor, an unyielding adherence to fairness and justice.

LIBRA ZODIAC PREDICTIONS MAY 2024

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My wife recently had her 2nd C-section due to pregnancy complications, and was discharged several days later. On top of being exhausted, she was still in considerable pain since they cut through scar tissue from her first c-section.
On the day of her discharge, my job as her husband seemed clear enough: safely get her to our car with minimal hassle so we can finally go home! So after wheeling my wife to the front hospital entrance, I quickly run to get my car, pull up to the patient pickup area, and throw on my hazard lights.
To get to my wife, though, I have to cross the valet lane on foot. As I'm doing that, my focus is interrupted by a JARRING car horn coming from a gigantic SUV less than one foot from my body. I glance to my side to see this rich older Karen and her baboon looking son wildly gesticulating at me with disgusted looks on their faces to move my car. It was the classic "who farted??" look that entitled white Karens give when something doesn't go their way.
Except... their car was parallel to mine, which made her demand that much more confusing.

1. Why was she in the valet lane, when she wasn't planning to use the valet? (Answer: she got in the wrong lane)
   
2. Why not throw the car in reverse since there was nobody behind them and could easily rectify her mistake in less than 10 seconds?
   
3. If option 2 is seemingly too complicated, then why not drink a nice tall glass of stfu and wait for the ONE CAR in front of you to finish their business and move?
   

Nope. She chose Option #4, ie the one that requires the least amount of effort: hold down her horn until other people solve her problems.
Now I'm known for being calm and diplomatic in both private and professional settings — but this tweaked a nerve deep down that is especially reserved for entitled Boomers who have zero regard for your personal circumstances.
So I gave her a "what's your deal?" look and she rolls down her window. I then proceed to directly (and very loudly) explain my family's situation and how it connects to me temporarily leaving my car. And what is her response? She plays it off with a "Why are you so mad?!" with a little laugh, right out of the Tucker Carlson School of obnoxious gaslighting.
Ofc I'm exasperated at this point, and my wife is still waiting. However, luckily one of the hospital workers saw the whole thing and wheeled my wife to my car. As this is happening, the car in front of Karen moves (~2 minutes later) and she drives off. What made me feel somewhat better was the hospital worker walks up to me as we're loading up and goes "I have a lot to say about that lady but it might get me fired!"
Stupidity followed by entitlement, followed by gaslighting. Does it get any more Boomer than this?

NOTE: this Karen definitely was not there for some type of emergency because there's a separate hospital section for that. Likely she was leaving after picking up her son, or was there to visit someone.

So it's called the circle of creation. Basically the idea is instead of being able to control animals or full wild shape. They turn the elements into creatures or plants so basically at high levels you could make a drake out of stone and have it be able to shoot stone or make a tree out of water and stuff like that. What do you guys think?

I'm looking for something to do gig work in. I've been doing it several years and it's lucrative in my market, and honestly the biggest priority to me is not even reliability but just something I can sit in for hours with minimal body aches/pains. Something that absorbs bumps in the road well, takes turns gently, comfortable seats, etc.
I'm currently driving a 2022 Mazda 3, and if it were just a regular daily commuter I'd love it. It's fun to drive. But I don't need fun to drive anymore. I don't want to feel every bump in the road or be tossed around on each turn because the car has little body roll. And the seats are fine, but could be a little cushier. I'd also like something that just felt a little less cramped.
Honestly I'm not scared of "unreliable." When you look at the data on websites like repairpal, maintenance and repair costs don't vary as wildly as people often expect. I'm not saying I'm going to go buy a 15 year old Mercedes, but within reason, I'm willing to sacrifice some reliability. If I got a hybrid, I'd save several times on gas compared to my Mazda than what any difference in reliability between two vehicles could save me.
So that's why my biggest two priorities are comfort, and mpg. I guess I said I don't need "fun" to drive, but the truth is if it can be fun without having stiffer suspension, that would be great. I want something that makes longer shifts in a vehicle more bearable, and something that's enjoyable to drive is a part of that. Comfort is just the bigger priority.
Anyways I appreciate anyone's help. I'd probably be in the market for something that's at least a few years old, probably <20k budget.
Tldr: I want something super comfortable that gets great mpg even if it means sacrificing a bit on reliability.

To cast a spell from a book you are carrying, roll an INT check vs DC11, or 11+Level for spells that target a creature. Careers do not grant modifiers to these spell checks. The margin of success of your check, up to a maximum of your character level, is the spells Power. i.e. A third level character who beats the target by 7 would cast a spell of POW 3. If they beat the target by 1, the spell is POW 1. Where “INT” appears in the spell description, replace it with "POW".
After each spell attempt, whether successful or not, mark a point of Drain. This cumulative Drain score acts as a penalty to any further spell checks, and remains until you have a full rest (a meal and two watches of sleep). If a spell check succeeds exactly, i.e. a margin of 0, treat it as POW 1 but with a Drain of 2.
OPTION: Chaos Magic Surges
When casting a spell:

• On a natural 20, reduce your Drain by 1d4 (but not less than 0)
  
• On a natural 1, you take 1d4 direct damage from spell burn.
  
• On a natural 13, your spell succeeds or fails as normal, but in addition a wild magical effect occurs. The GM can choose or roll for a random spell. Roll 1d4 for the POW of the effect.
  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I think this relatively straight forward, and I like the differences it introduces:

• Magic becomes more common at low levels, not a one and done for the day. But it also becomes less reliable. Spells are still powerful, but they can be hit or miss just like combat. A sleep spell can still end the combat, but it might not do it on round one. It might drop only a single goblin or all of them.
• By making it a roll, there's a design space you can play in - maybe a chaos node boosts shapeshifting magic, or light spells are more difficult in the lair of the wraith king. You can give advantage or disadvantage to certain aspects, or change the Drain cost.
• Saving throws are baked into the roll - the higher the creature's level, the lower the spells effective power, or it doesn't effect them at all. If a spell targets a creatures weakness, like an illusion spell deceiving a dumb ogre, or ice on a fire elemental, you could use 1/2 level instead, or maybe give the caster advantage on their caster check.
• Spellbooks are valuable to all characters in these rules. Even if they didn't invest in INT they might be able to get a spell off a few times. Because its an INT check though, characters who do have INT will be able to cast spells more often and more effectively.
• Drain keeps the characters from spamming spells - each time they try, it reduces their chances of casting the next spell. If they are still casting too many spells for your taste, make each attempt cost 2 Drain instead.
• There's no restriction against casting the same spell multiple times in this version, unlike the main rules. This is by choice; the idea of wizards having signature spells appeals to me. However it would be just as easy to add it back in, or maybe a compromise where they have disadvantage to cast that spell again until the next day.
• The chaos magic option is there if you want magic to be even more of a risk. If the direct damage on 1 is too harsh, change it to 1d4 additional Drain from the spell.

So my father used to own a cabin. In fact he used to own a lot of different properties. Which I suppose is just a roundabout way of saying that we grew up with money. Where things get a bit complicated is how he actually made that money.
The line that he constantly fed us was that he was an accountant running his own firm in an office in the city. Long hours, lots of business trips. We never saw him much. And whenever we did, he always seemed tired, his eyes perpetually bloodshot, as if he were always trying to force them to stay open.
He was sent off to prison right after I’d finished my first year of college.
The sentence? Fifteen years, for washing hundreds of millions of dollars for numerous cartels. Two weeks after he’d been booked, my mother committed suicide. As it turns out, she’d been helping him out through the entire thing and was facing some time herself. I guess she didn’t want to deal with all that and took the drastic way out.
A few months later, the government had seized pretty much all his property.
All of it, except for that cabin in the woods.
It took a long time for me to feel normal again. But eventually I managed it. Went back to school and graduated with a good enough GPA which allowed me to snag some shitty office job a few months later. But it was enough to pay the bills.
Fast forward about another year and I’ve basically scrubbed that entire sequence of events out of my brain. It took a little bit of therapy, a lot of psychedelics, but I finally did it, to the point where I was comfortable enough to go back to that cabin, the one place where I’d see my father for more than a few weeks at a time during our summer trips.
I decided to take along three of my friends from Uni - Jack, Pedro, Randy.
We drove down there at the beginning of May. The road leading to the cabin hadn’t been maintained at all and as a result, it had become borderline undrivable. I decided to save my vehicle the stress and parked in a nearby lot, leaving us about a one-and-a-half-mile trek through the woods, which really wasn’t so bad.
Our time in the cabin was pretty much spent getting drunk and stoned, and by the third night we had completely run out of food.
We decided to take the thirty minute walk over to the nearest rest stop, where I knew that there was a 24/7 diner. So we go there, eat our meals, and on the way back we notice a burning smell in the woods, as if there was a bonfire raging about nearby.
Of course that was a bit strange given that it was around 2AM. But we didn’t think too much of it at the time and we kept walking.
It was only when the smell continued to grow stronger as we got closer to the cabin that we understood something was very wrong. Soon it had become suffocating, and we could see the night sky tinged with orange in the near distance.
I felt my heart drop into my stomach and immediately I was sprinting, my worst fear realized as I reached the clearing where the cabin was located.
Completely up in flames, plumes of dark smoke blending in with the night.
It was a mix of different emotions that hit me all at once, the combination of them creating a sense of dread so deep I hadn’t thought it possible.
After reeling myself in, I called 9-1-1, with the operator telling me that the fire department would be on their way but wouldn’t be able to reach us for at least thirty minutes. The four of us walked away from the cabin in silence, getting far enough so that the smoke was no longer scratching at our throats.
Around ten minutes later, we noticed that the orange tinge in the sky had suddenly disappeared. And I mean suddenly. Like, gone in a single blink. I thought I might’ve been hallucinating, but it was clear from their expressions that my friends were seeing something similar.
Cautiously, we started making our way back towards the cabin, noticing that the smoke was no longer heavy in the air, having cleared up considerably. Once we reached the clearing, it had disappeared altogether.
I looked ahead, my brain working overtime to comprehend the sight before me. The cabin was no longer on fire. Burnt to a crisp, sure. But the raging, overwhelming flames that had been consuming it just minutes prior had somehow completely fizzled out.
The four of us looked between each other, as if to confirm we were all still seeing the same thing.
Using the flashlight on my phone to survey the damage, I found pretty much what I’d expected. Complete destruction. Absolutely zero hope of recovering anything.
I started taking some deep breaths, trying to calm myself down when I heard Pedro yelling out from the other side.
“Guys… where the fuck did this thing come from?”
We all walked over to him. Nestled in the debris was the corpse of… something. A monstrosity.
It was about the size of a bear, with the sections of its body that weren’t burnt showing pale, clammy skin with deep cuts etched throughout it, in what looked to be some kind of crude pattern. Its head had been smashed in, leaving nothing but an abnormally wide bottom jaw which was still baring long, black teeth. It had an uncountable number of long, thick arms that it was using to hold something that resembled a human infant, one that appeared to be completely unscathed, devoid of any burn marks. The longer I stared at it, the more that I was convinced I could see it breathing.
It was a bizarre enough sight to put us into a near-trance. What eventually snapped us out of it was the chanting.
It was barely noticeable at first, slowly escalating in pitch until it was clear that there were several human voices shouting in unison. Their tones were animalistic, their words strung together with just the bare beginnings of a rhythm. It sounded like they were speaking English, though I could hardly make out anything they were saying.
The strangest part though, was how quickly it was getting closer to us. Definitely not a walking pace. It was more like a sprint.
The four of us shared a quick glance between each other and immediately there was an understanding.
We ran like bats out of hell, tripping over branches, our own feet.
But eventually we reached my car, all of us scrambling to pile into it. As I was fumbling for my keys, the chanting had become deafening, to a point that hardly made sense. It sounded as if there were speakers lined up in a circle around us, all blasting that horrible noise.
And the second that I had put the keys into the ignition, things went silent. I found myself holding my breath as I looked up, my eyes slowly adjusting to the darkness until what I was seeing was unmistakable. Several figures standing completely still at the edge of the woods. All human-shaped but far too large to be people.
All the air being held in my lungs flooded out with one big exhale and I slammed the vehicle into drive and took a sharp turn before speeding the hell out of there, refusing to look in the rearview until we had made it into the highway.
I drove until I had reached the rest stop, which was now hosting an absurd number of police cars. I parked, got out, and approached one of the cops, asking if they were here because of the fire.
The cop shook his head. “Fire? No. Has there been a fire?”
I explained the situation with the cabin to him, deciding to leave out the creature and the chanting for the time being.
The cop nodded slowly, his expression remaining largely the same throughout.
“Alright,” he said. “We’ll look into it. And then give you an update in the morning. For tonight, just get a hotel or something.”
We exchanged numbers and I thanked him. As I began to walk away, he called out to me.
“Hey, can I ask you something?”
I turned back around.
“Yeah,” I said. “Sure.”
“Do you happen to be (my dad’s name)’s son?”
For a while I just stared at him. Eventually I nodded.
“Yeah,” he said. “I thought I recognized you.”
“I don’t understand,” I told him. “I’ve never seen you before.”
The cop took a deep breath before taking a quick look around. “Come here,” he said. “Come close.”
Tentatively, I did so.
“I can’t tell you everything. I don’t even know everything. But I think you should have the right to know the truth about your father. All of the stuff that’s happened here tonight, all of the shit that you’ve seen… it has something to do with him.
He took another look around before continuing. “Cartels, right? Was that the story they told you? It’s not so creative. But I guess it doesn’t have to be creative to be believable. Cause the shit that he was actually mixed up in… you would not believe unless you’ve seen it for yourself.”
“What the hell are you talking about?” I asked.
“Look, I have your number. I’ll be in touch tomorrow morning. This is something I’m curious about as well. Maybe you can give me some answers, point me in the right directions. But not here. So get out of here before people start noticing you. And stay safe.”
I didn’t feel like staying in a hotel that night, so I drove back into the city, dropping everybody off before arriving back at my own apartment.
Of course I couldn’t sleep that night, my eyes wired open into the morning as I waited for the officer to call. He still hadn’t by the time that noon rolled around and so I tried calling him instead.
No answer.
Eventually I did receive a call from the police, telling me that my father’s cabin had burned down and that it was due to a forest fire.
I told them that wasn’t possible because there had been no forest fire and that I suspected foul play and wanted it to be investigated.
“It’s already been investigated,” are the exact words that the officer told me. “Don’t worry about it. Just get in touch with insurance. Go over your options.”
And before I could say anything else, he had hung up on me.
It was a mixture of anger and curiosity that compelled me to drive back down there. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn’t for the road leading towards the rest stop to be blocked altogether. There were two cop cars guarding the barrier, with a single officer signalling any vehicles approaching to turn around.
I pulled over to the side of the road and after some careful deliberation, I decided to get out and approach him and ask what was going on. Just to see what he might say.
When I finished the question, he stared at me for a long time. Uncomfortably long.
“Emergency construction,” is what he eventually told me.
After that encounter, I pretty much dropped trying to figure things out.
Some weird things have started happening to me since. Every night, I swear I can hear a baby crying in the apartment across from mine. The apartment that I thought had been occupied by a pair of college kids who definitely do not have children.
That cop that was supposed to call me finally did, a few nights ago. When I answered, I was met with dead silence on the other end. Nearly thirty seconds of it until the line clicked dead.
There’s an abandoned house sitting across the street from my apartment building, one that’s supposedly been there for years because the development of the store meant to take its place keeps getting delayed.
Somebody has started staring at me through its second-floor window. Whenever I catch them doing it, they’re quick to close the blinds, so I can never catch any details. But I know that the moment I turn away from it, their eyes are back on me.
I can’t confirm that any of these things are related. Whether it has anything to do with my father.
I just know that I don’t want to deal with it and that I want it to end.

I'm starting a new job as a line cook at a steakhouse soon and was looking for any good reccomendations. I'm familiar with both Euro and Japanese profile knives and own both currently. I have a lovely Munetoshi gyuto 240 in White steel and several Victorinox knives. I'm open to both wa and western handled knives, I prefer carbon steel but a stainless clad would probably be best given the setting. I'm hoping to buy a Sabatier or Gyuto, paring knife and something to cut steaks. My budget is about $500. I'm experienced sharpening and have a set of shapton stones and a honing rod. If y'all have any favorite knife rolls to I'd be pumped to hear.

LIBRA ZODIAC PREDICTIONS MAY 2024

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Over the course of the past few months I have been working on compiling a list of my 500 favorite songs. It was sort of challenge that I gave myself and I'm super pumped with how it turned out. There were a few rules (only 5 songs per artist being the big rule, among a few others), and here's the list I came up with. Thought it was fun, so wanted to share here and see if it might spark any discussion about song placement, lack of songs/artists, or see if anyone had any similar lists. All thoughts are welcome! (and if you don't care to comb through all 500 songs for your favorite song or artist I'm more than happy to help you track 'em down)

1. Trash Panda - Aging out of the 20th Century
   
2. Djo - Roddy
   
3. The Beatles - Don't Let Me Down
   
4. Snail Mail - Heat Wave
   
5. Phoebe Bridgers - Savior Complex
   
6. Joji - SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK
   
7. The Shins - The Fear
   
8. Talking Heads - This Must Be the Place (Naive Melody)
   
9. The Cranberries - Linger
   
10. Post Animal - Ralphie
    
11. Hop Along - Not Abel
    
12. The Beach Boys - Heroes And Villains
    
13. Electric Light Orchestra - Livin' Thing
    
14. The Monkees - As We Go Along
    
15. Blondie - Heart Of Glass
    
16. The Strokes - Oblivius
    
17. Chet Baker - It's Always You
    
18. The Beatles - Rain
    
19. Electric Light Orchestra - Telephone Line
    
20. Husbands - Must Be a Cop
    
21. Faces - Ooh La La
    
22. The Flaming Lips - Do You Realize??
    
23. Frank Ocean - Nights
    
24. Harry James - It's Been a Long, Long Time
    
25. The Turtles - Happy Together
    
26. Etta James - At Last
    
27. The Zombies - The Way I Feel Inside
    
28. The Beatles - Here, There And Everywhere
    
29. The Beach Boys - God Only Knows
    
30. Kanye West - Father Stretch My Hands Pt. 1
    
31. Briston Maroney - Sinkin'
    
32. John Lennon - Oh My Love
    
33. Herb Alpert & The Tijuana Brass - Ladyfingers
    
34. Squirrel Flower - Headlights
    
35. The Backseat Lovers - Maple Syrup
    
36. The B-52's - Rock Lobster
    
37. George Harrison - All Things Must Pass
    
38. Snail Mail - Ben Franklin
    
39. Laura Elliott - Grass Stains
    
40. Djo - Chateau (Feel Alright)
    
41. Tame Impala - Eventually
    
42. The Backseat Lovers - Snowbank Blues
    
43. Claude Debussy - Clair de Lune
    
44. The Weeknd - Save Your Tears
    
45. Talking Heads - Thank You for Sending Me an Angel
    
46. The Zombies - Time of the Season
    
47. The War On Drugs - Nothing to Find
    
48. Queen - Brighton Rock
    
49. The Dream Academy - Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want
    
50. The B-52's - Strobe Light
    
51. The Cranberries - Dreams
    
52. Fugees - Killing Me Softly With His Song
    
53. Molchat Doma - Тоска
    
54. Tyler, The Creator - ARE WE STILL FRIENDS?
    
55. The Mamas & The Papas - Dream A Little Dream Of Me
    
56. The Chords - Sh-Boom
    
57. The Beatles - The Abbey Road Medley
    
58. The Ronettes - Be My Baby
    
59. The Who - Baba O'Riley
    
60. Dr. Dog - Where'd All the Time Go?
    
61. M83 - My Tears Are Becoming A Sea
    
62. Billie Eilish - everything i wanted
    
63. Outkast - Hey Ya!
    
64. Nat King Cole - Orange Colored Sky
    
65. The Notorious B.I.G. - Hypnotize
    
66. Four Tops - Reach Out I'll Be There
    
67. Foreign Air - Shut Up and Show Me
    
68. Leonard Cohen - So Long, Marianne
    
69. dodie - If I'm Being Honest
    
70. Briston Maroney - June
    
71. Post Malone - Sunflower
    
72. John Lennon - Isolation
    
73. Buddy Holly & The Crickets - Not Fade Away
    
74. Phoebe Bridgers - I Know The End
    
75. Kanye West - All Falls Down
    
76. Alvvays - Adult Diversion
    
77. John Lennon - Beautiful Boy (Darling Boy)
    
78. Clairo - Amoeba
    
79. The Beach Boys - I Know There's An Answer
    
80. Paul McCartney - Let Me Roll It
    
81. Frank Ocean - Ivy
    
82. Radiohead - Motion Picture Soundtrack
    
83. Djo - Mutual Future (Repeat)
    
84. Phoebe Bridgers - Scott Street
    
85. Childish Gambino - Me and Your Mama
    
86. Pink Floyd - Astronomy Domine
    
87. The Pied Pipers - Dream
    
88. The Beach Boys - All I Wanna Do
    
89. Djo - Change
    
90. Второй этаж поражает - Крайности
    
91. Little Richard - Lucille
    
92. King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Shanghai
    
93. Chet Baker - Deep In A Dream
    
94. The Beatles - It's All Too Much
    
95. Post Animal - Dirtpicker
    
96. The B-52's - Love Shack
    
97. EDEN - foreve/over
    
98. Kanye West - Ultralight Beam
    
99. The Zombies - Going Out Of My Head
    
100. Talking Heads - Found a Job
     
101. Snail Mail - Pristine
     
102. Tom Tom Club - Genius of Love
     
103. Tears For Fears - Everybody Wants To Rule The World
     
104. WILLIS - I Think I Like When It Rains
     
105. Chet Baker - But Not For Me
     
106. Naked Eyes - Always Something There to Remind Me
     
107. Tyler, The Creator - GONE, GONE / THANK YOU
     
108. Djo - Half Life
     
109. Trash Panda - Check Please
     
110. Briston Maroney - Deep Sea Diver
     
111. Beach Fossils - This Year
     
112. Momma - Medicine
     
113. Hop Along - Prior Things
     
114. Talking Heads - Road to Nowhere
     
115. Electric Light Orchestra - Turn to Stone
     
116. Briston Maroney - It's Not My Fault
     
117. Tyler, The Creator - NEW MAGIC WAND
     
118. Snail Mail - Headlock
     
119. Phil Collins - Take Me Home
     
120. Gotye - Somebody That I Used To Know
     
121. The Beach Boys - Do It Again
     
122. Tame Impala - Breathe Deeper
     
123. Ella Fitzgerald - Misty
     
124. Phoebe Bridgers - Waiting Room
     
125. Kanye West - Runaway
     
126. Daft Punk - Get Lucky (feat. Pharrell Williams and Nile Rodgers)
     
127. Dire Straits - Money for Nothing
     
128. Kendrick Lamar - Alright
     
129. Black Country, New Road - Concorde
     
130. George Harrison - If Not for You
     
131. Harry Styles - Cherry
     
132. Ms. Lauryn Hill - Doo Wop (That Thing)
     
133. Paul McCartney - Junk
     
134. Wings - Maybe I'm Amazed [Live]
     
135. Talking Heads - Houses in Motion
     
136. Del Water Gap - Ode to a Conversation Stuck in Your Throat
     
137. Pixies - Where Is My Mind?
     
138. Queen - Seven Seas Of Rhye
     
139. Paul McCartney - Jet
     
140. Sufjan Stevens - Death with Dignity
     
141. A Flock Of Seagulls - I Ran (So Far Away)
     
142. Tame Impala - Let It Happen
     
143. Led Zeppelin - Whole Lotta Love
     
144. Clairo - Management
     
145. Tommy James & The Shondells - I Think We're Alone Now
     
146. Fergie - Clumsy
     
147. Childish Gambino - This Is America
     
148. Prefab Sprout - The King of Rock 'N' Roll
     
149. Joy Again - Looking Out for You
     
150. Beach House - Space Song
     
151. John Lennon - Mind Games
     
152. The Weeknd - Gasoline
     
153. Weezer - Buddy Holly
     
154. Phoebe Bridgers - Sidelines
     
155. Tame Impala - New Person, Same Old Mistakes
     
156. Lana Del Rey - A&W
     
157. The Dillards - I've Just Seen a Face
     
158. The Doors - Break on Through (To the Other Side)
     
159. Julie London - I'm Glad There Is You
     
160. 2Pac - California Love
     
161. Dean Martin - Everybody Loves Somebody
     
162. Snail Mail - Anytime
     
163. The Strokes - The Adults Are Talking
     
164. Jordana, TV Girl - Better in the Dark
     
165. Juice WRLD - Hide (feat. Seezyn)
     
166. The Wild Reeds - Get Better
     
167. Finom - Mine
     
168. Hop Along - One That Suits Me
     
169. The Killers - Mr. Brightside
     
170. Michael Cera - Clay Pigeons
     
171. Clairo - Bags
     
172. Prince - Let's Go Crazy
     
173. The Zombies - She's Not There
     
174. Blackstreet - No Diggity
     
175. Frank Sinatra - I've Got You Under My Skin
     
176. John Denver - Take Me Home, Country Roads
     
177. Harry James - I'm Beginning to See The Light
     
178. The Clash - London Calling
     
179. Charles Bradley - Changes
     
180. Buddy Holly - (Ummmm, Oh Yeah) Dearest
     
181. Eagles - Seven Bridges Road [Live]
     
182. Moxie - Honey
     
183. Faces - Stay with Me
     
184. Post Animal - How Do You Feel
     
185. New Order - Age of Consent
     
186. Natalie Imbruglia - Torn
     
187. Lana Del Rey - Doin' Time
     
188. Twin Peaks - Blue Coupe
     
189. Kanye West - Gold Digger
     
190. Fruit Bats - The Bottom of It
     
191. Frank Sinatra - Somethin' Stupid
     
192. Lorde - Perfect Places
     
193. Martha Tilton - Exactly Like You
     
194. King Crimson - 21st Century Schizoid Man
     
195. Glen Campbell - Southern Nights
     
196. Claire Rosinkranz - Frankenstein
     
197. Guillemots - Made-Up Lovesong #43
     
198. Fleetwood Mac - Say You Love Me
     
199. Frankie Valli - Can't Take My Eyes off You
     
200. The Crickets - Don't Ever Change
     
201. Paul Anka - Put Your Head On My Shoulder
     
202. George Harrison - Isn't It a Pity
     
203. Trash Panda - Off
     
204. Super Besse - Holod
     
205. Beyoncé - Hold Up
     
206. Charlie Burg - I Don't Wanna Be Okay Without You
     
207. Eagles - Peaceful Easy Feeling
     
208. Ella Fitzgerald - It's A Lovely Day Today
     
209. PERMSKY KRAY - Дорогой Человек
     
210. The Little Dippers - Forever
     
211. The B-52's - There's a Moon in the Sky (Called the Moon)
     
212. Patti Page - Old Cape Cod
     
213. Daft Punk - Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger
     
214. The Soggy Bottom Boys - I Am A Man Of Constant Sorrow
     
215. Trash Panda - Things Will Never Change
     
216. Hop Along - Well-dressed
     
217. Sixpence None The Richer - Kiss Me
     
218. TV Girl - Daughter of a Cop
     
219. LAUNDRY DAY - Jane
     
220. Tyler, The Creator - EARFQUAKE
     
221. Sigue Sigue Sputnik - Love Missile F1-11
     
222. Joji - Gimme Love
     
223. The Backseat Lovers - Pool House
     
224. The Weeknd - Take My Breath
     
225. Mild High Club - Homage
     
226. Doc Watson - Am I Born to Die?
     
227. Daniel Caesar - Streetcar
     
228. The Kinks - Sunny Afternoon
     
229. John Lennon - #9 Dream
     
230. Tame Impala - Elephant
     
231. Chuck Berry - You Never Can Tell
     
232. Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here
     
233. KIDS SEE GHOSTS - 4th Dimension
     
234. Soft Cell - Tainted Love
     
235. The B-52's - Song for a Future Generation
     
236. Gnarls Barkley - Crazy
     
237. Lana Del Rey - Blue Jeans
     
238. Billie Eilish - Halley's Comet
     
239. Glenn Miller - In the Mood
     
240. Kid Bloom - Control
     
241. The Cinematic Orchestra - To Build A Home
     
242. Marvin Gaye - I Heard It Through The Grapevine
     
243. Brenda Lee - If You Love Me (Really Love Me)
     
244. TV Girl - Lovers Rock
     
245. Art Lown - Knew You Well
     
246. Dean Martin - Ain't That A Kick In The Head
     
247. Miniature Tigers - Like or Like Like
     
248. Electric Light Orchestra - Sweet Talkin' Woman
     
249. The Hunts - Ages
     
250. The Cars - Good Times Roll
     
251. Bill Withers - Lovely Day
     
252. Drake - God's Plan
     
253. Kansas - Point of Know Return
     
254. The Neighbourhood - Stargazing
     
255. The Clash - Rock the Casbah
     
256. Hop Along - What the Writer Meant
     
257. Briston Maroney - Under My Skin
     
258. Jack Stauber - Buttercup
     
259. King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Ya Love
     
260. Ginger Root - Loretta
     
261. Thompson Twins - Hold Me Now
     
262. Frank Ocean - Pyramids
     
263. Kate Bush - Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God)
     
264. Destroy Boys - I Threw Glass at My Friend's Eyes and Now I'm on Probation
     
265. Mild High Club - Dionysian State
     
266. Franz Ferdinand - Take Me Out
     
267. Kevin Abstract - Empty
     
268. The Frights - Crust Bucket
     
269. Stealers Wheel - Stuck In The Middle With You
     
270. The Shins - Fighting in a Sack
     
271. fun. - We Are Young (feat. Janelle Monáe)
     
272. Lil Uzi Vert - Money Longer
     
273. Miniature Tigers - Cannibal Queen
     
274. The Doors - Touch Me
     
275. Jean Dawson - Clear Bones
     
276. King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Catching Smoke
     
277. Molchat Doma - Люди Надоели
     
278. The Go-Go's - Our Lips Are Sealed
     
279. Billie Eilish - ocean eyes
     
280. BOYO - Crown
     
281. The 1975 - Somebody Else
     
282. Husbands - She's a Betty
     
283. Syd Barrett - If It's In You
     
284. Trash Panda - Atlanta Girls
     
285. Frank Ocean - Godspeed
     
286. Alice Phoebe Lou - Glow
     
287. Childish Gambino - Redbone
     
288. New Order - Blue Monday
     
289. Post Animal - Schedule
     
290. Harry Styles - Fine Line
     
291. Harry James - I'll Get By (As Long As I Have You)
     
292. Depeche Mode - Never Let Me Down Again
     
293. Chet Baker - I Fall In Love Too Easily
     
294. The Cranberries - Put Me Down
     
295. John Mayer - Edge of Desire
     
296. George Harrison - All Those Years Ago
     
297. Electric Light Orchestra - The Diary of Horace Wimp
     
298. Alex Clare - Too Close
     
299. Eric B. & Rakim - Know The Ledge
     
300. Peter Frampton - Show Me The Way [Live]
     
301. Simon & Garfunkel - Mrs. Robinson
     
302. Black Eyes - Deformative
     
303. The Righteous Brothers - Unchained Melody
     
304. Bonny Light Horseman - Deep In Love
     
305. The Walker Brothers - The Sun Ain't Gonna Shine Anymore
     
306. Cage The Elephant - Cigarette Daydreams
     
307. Hot Flash Heat Wave - Raindrop
     
308. Clairo - Sofia
     
309. Kendrick Lamar - PRIDE.
     
310. Camille Saint-Saëns - The Swan
     
311. Weezer - Say It Ain't So
     
312. C418 - Sweden
     
313. Lana Del Rey - Let The Light In (feat. Father John Misty)
     
314. The Postal Service - Such Great Heights
     
315. Pickin' On Series - Those to Come
     
316. Lana Del Rey - Grandfather please stand on the shoulders of my father while he's deep-sea fishing (feat. RIOPY)
     
317. John Mayer - Moving On and Getting Over
     
318. Field Medic - POWERFUL LOVE
     
319. Cage The Elephant - Flow
     
320. Joji - Run
     
321. The Who - Won't Get Fooled Again
     
322. Boston - Peace of Mind
     
323. Ben E. King - This Magic Moment
     
324. David Bowie - Starman
     
325. Beastie Boys - Sabotage
     
326. Harry Belafonte - Banana Boat (Day-O)
     
327. Gene Krupa & His Orchestra - Rhumboogie
     
328. The Cardigans - Lovefool
     
329. The Kinks - You Really Got Me
     
330. The Zombies - She's Coming Home
     
331. Michael Jackson - Thriller
     
332. Moxie - Blue Skies
     
333. The Mamas & The Papas - Straight Shooter
     
334. Peter, Paul and Mary - Don't Think Twice, It's All Right
     
335. Green Day - Brain Stew
     
336. Dua Lipa - Levitating (feat. DaBaby)
     
337. The Police - Roxanne
     
338. Britney Spears - Toxic
     
339. Tears For Fears - Head Over Heels
     
340. Rex Orange County - Pluto Projector
     
341. The Strokes - Call It Fate, Call It Karma
     
342. Portugal. The Man - Feel It Still
     
343. The Black Crowes - Twice As Hard
     
344. Ted Nugent - Stranglehold
     
345. fun. - Some Nights
     
346. Wings - Silly Love Songs
     
347. Paramore - Still into You
     
348. Peter Frampton - Baby, I Love Your Way [Live]
     
349. The Monkees - Last Train to Clarksville
     
350. Royel Otis - Oysters In My Pocket
     
351. The Backseat Lovers - Growing/Dying
     
352. Nelly Furtado - Say It Right
     
353. Post Animal - Goggles
     
354. Erik Satie - Gymnopédie No. 1
     
355. Childish Gambino - IV. Sweatpants
     
356. Steely Dan - Dirty Work
     
357. ABBA - Lay All Your Love On Me
     
358. Still Woozy - Goodie Bag
     
359. Arlo Parks - Black Dog
     
360. Goth Babe - Weekend Friend
     
361. George & the Handsomes - Sleepy Beats
     
362. boygenius - 20
     
363. The Mills Brothers - You Always Hurt The One You Love
     
364. Travis Scott - SICKO MODE
     
365. Pinegrove - Need 2
     
366. The Backseat Lovers - Sinking Ship
     
367. Franz Schubert - Ave Maria
     
368. Zac Brown Band - Knee Deep (feat. Jimmy Buffett)
     
369. Justin Timberlake - Mirrors
     
370. Simon & Garfunkel - Cecilia
     
371. The Cranberries - Zombie
     
372. Daniel Caesar - Japanese Denim
     
373. Billie Holiday - Easy Living
     
374. ISLAND - By Your Side
     
375. Phil Collins - Tomorrow Never Knows
     
376. Bob Dylan - The Times They Are A-Changin'
     
377. The Four Freshmen - Day By Day
     
378. Fleetwood Mac - The Chain
     
379. Billy Joel - Big Shot
     
380. Billie Eilish - Happier Than Ever
     
381. Yot Club - down bad
     
382. Rihanna - Stay
     
383. Fleetwood Mac - Landslide
     
384. Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky - Swan Lake, Op. 20, Act 2: No. 10, Scene. Moderato
     
385. The White Stripes - Fell In Love With a Girl
     
386. Alvvays - Easy On Your Own?
     
387. Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit - If We Were Vampires
     
388. Blackway - What's Up Danger (with Black Caviar)
     
389. Albert Hammond - It Never Rains in Southern California
     
390. Matt Maltese - Jupiter
     
391. John Denver - Mother Nature's Son
     
392. Childish Gambino - Sober
     
393. Claire Rosinkranz - Pools and Palm Trees
     
394. The Cars - Just What I Needed
     
395. The Doors - Light My Fire
     
396. Blondie - Tomorrow Never Knows
     
397. King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Hell's Itch
     
398. The Japanese House - Saw You In A Dream
     
399. Franz Schubert - String Quartet No. 13 in A Minor, Op. 29 No. 1, D. 804
     
400. The Drifters - White Christmas
     
401. The 1975 - Robbers
     
402. George Harrison - Between The Devil And The Deep Blue Sea
     
403. The Frights - Tongues
     
404. Paramore - Ain't It Fun
     
405. Billy Joel - Pressure
     
406. Frank Sinatra - My Way
     
407. Art Lown - Going Back to Carolina
     
408. Bruno Mars - Just the Way You Are
     
409. Under The Rug - Lonesome & Mad
     
410. The Mamas & The Papas - Dedicated To The One I Love
     
411. Foster The People - Sit Next to Me
     
412. Weezer - Undone - The Sweater Song
     
413. Michael Jackson - Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'
     
414. Tia Blake - Plastic Jesus
     
415. Los Bravos - Bring a Little Lovin'
     
416. Lady Gaga - Bad Romance
     
417. Minnie Riperton - Les Fleurs
     
418. Billy Idol - Dancing with Myself
     
419. Cody Fry - I Hear a Symphony
     
420. Gringo Sapiens - Driver's Licence
     
421. Vacations - Relax
     
422. Glitter Party - time waits
     
423. Steve Lacy - Bad Habit
     
424. The Crystals - Then He Kissed Me
     
425. The Pied Pipers - Mairzy Doats
     
426. Mitski - Bug Like an Angel
     
427. James Ray - I've Got My Mind Set On You
     
428. Clairo - Bubble Gum
     
429. Masayoshi Takanaka - SEXY DANCE
     
430. Nat King Cole - (I Love You) For Sentimental Reasons
     
431. Sleigh Bells - Crown On the Ground
     
432. Olivia Rodrigo - favorite crime
     
433. No Doubt - Just A Girl
     
434. Foreigner - Long, Long Way from Home
     
435. Heart - Crazy On You
     
436. The Hunts - Darlin'
     
437. David Bowie - Heroes
     
438. Alice Phoebe Lou - Hammer
     
439. Thee Oh Sees - Toe Cutter - Thumb Buster
     
440. Roar - I Can't Handle Change
     
441. TV Girl - Birds Dont Sing
     
442. Laufey - From The Start
     
443. Chas McDevitt Skiffle Group - Freight Train (feat. Nancy Whiskey)
     
444. Metro Boomin - Am I Dreaming
     
445. Liana Flores - rises the moon
     
446. POP ETC - Speak Up
     
447. Jean Knight - Mr. Big Stuff
     
448. The Platters - Twilight Time
     
449. Derek & The Dominos - Layla
     
450. King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard - Homeless Man in Adidas
     
451. Charlie Burg - Lovesong (The Way)
     
452. Hot Flash Heat Wave - Gutter Girl
     
453. ABBA - Fernando
     
454. Mitski - My Love Mine All Mine
     
455. Savannah Conley - More Than Fine
     
456. Young the Giant - Mind Over Matter
     
457. Future Crib - Yer Movin'
     
458. Bob Dylan - Like a Rolling Stone
     
459. benches - Violent
     
460. Musical Youth - Pass The Dutchie
     
461. Olivia Rodrigo - vampire
     
462. Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone - City Of Stars
     
463. Maya Hawke - Thérèse
     
464. Current Joys - A Different Age
     
465. Wayne Newton - Danke Schoen
     
466. La Roux - Bulletproof
     
467. Jason Segel, Walter - Man Or Muppet
     
468. U2 - I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For
     
469. The Raconteurs - Steady, As She Goes
     
470. The Ink Spots - Into Each Life Some Rain Must Fall
     
471. Ace of Base - The Sign
     
472. Vulfpeck - 1612
     
473. Nordista Freeze - Hey GiGi
     
474. The Chainsmokers - New York City
     
475. Suki Waterhouse - Johanna
     
476. Pete Rodriguez - I Like It Like That
     
477. Calvin Harris - Summer
     
478. The Rare Occasions - Notion
     
479. a-ha - Take on Me
     
480. Rush - Working Man
     
481. Traffic - Dear Mr. Fantasy
     
482. Starbuck - Moonlight Feels Right
     
483. Van Halen - Drop Dead Legs
     
484. The Troggs - Wild Thing
     
485. Led Zeppelin - Good Times Bad Times
     
486. The Byrds - Turn! Turn! Turn! (To Everything There Is a Season)
     
487. Cream - Sunshine Of Your Love
     
488. Justin Timberlake - SexyBack (feat. Timbaland)
     
489. David Bowie - Suffragette City
     
490. Ludwig van Beethoven - Sonata No. 14 in C-Sharp Minor, Op. 27, No. 2 "Moonlight"
     
491. Avicii - Wake Me Up
     
492. The Who - La-La-La-Lies
     
493. The Spinners - The Rubberband Man
     
494. MGMT - Time to Pretend
     
495. Hootie & The Blowfish - Only Wanna Be With You
     
496. Sheck Wes - Mo Bamba
     
497. Claire Rosinkranz - 123
     
498. Ringo Starr - Photograph
     
499. The Proclaimers - I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)
     
500. Duran Duran - Rio
     

[OC Intro: The game is modded to increase basic jobs cost, seasonal events are disabled. Much of the crash details are based on NASA/SP-2008-565 Columbia Crew Survival Investigation Report recommendations especially Chapter 3 "Occupant Protection".]
The ship is without power, and Tightniks can't run the radar much without draining the batteries. He has only a few minutes of APU power left, goes over the best clearing he can find, and radars it. It varies by only a few feet from the aerodynamic glideslope there. He spots it out on the cameras and circles to go after that spot. He's only at two hundred feet now. With one hand on the stick, he uses the other to open the pressure equalization valve on the side hatch, then at one hundred feet, gets it undogged. Depending on how much damage he's going to get, it's less likely to be stuck closed and trap him. The dynamic vacuum this pulls in the cockpit rips most of the survival pack data cards from that rack and scatters them across the landscape. Crap, I'm gonna need those! Refocusing on surviving the next few seconds, he turns on the radar for the final approach, takes a last look around, then straight ahead at his forward camera and PFD, he clicks his HANS and shoulder strap locks in; after that, he can barely move, but that now is better than dying in this crash with a broken neck. He's a decent pilot and brings up the flare gently. Bringing up the alpha on this delta-winged ship, he balloons a little, but keeps the nose going up and restores a zero aerodynamic sink rate just above the highest terrain indicated by the radar altimeter. The ship bumps a little in the ground effect, and he can see the radar altitude cycling irregularly up and down about five feet at a time. Rougher than it looked from higher up! The body flap protecting the dead engines hits first, and the nose comes rapidly down. It hits, the screens go blank, and Tightniks is surrounded by airbags, some lifting his feet from the rudder petals and his hand from the control stick. It's blinding, it's disorienting, it's noisy, and, to his relief, it's long! It takes several seconds before the crashing cockpit stops moving. How many times did he flip over? Did he go sideways and roll? Am I rightside up? Are we really stopped on the ground? The airbags deflate, and he can move his arms. He gets his restraints loose and inspects himself. "Uck!" he says out loud (without the 'f'). No broken bones. His pressure suit can take his blood pressure. 116/81, pulse 112, blood oxygen 99 reads off on his left arm, I'll friggin' take it!
The ship is amazingly intact from what he can tell. He can't get any readings. The systems test meter seems to be working, but can't find any voltages anywhere. The ship seems to be completely dead. Behind him, 10 passenger seats are all surrounded by airbags and the back of the cabin ends in some sort of dirt-and-gravel and there's a bit of daylight seeping in around the edges. He was the only one on board, though, so their deployment was mostly academic (they might have stiffened the structure a little during the crash, but that's probably trivial.) Tightniks gets out of his spacesuit. The air on this planet is actually breathable. He gets the hatch open, steps outside and-
"A green shimmer erupts then disappears, and you hit the ground."
The human emerges from the glowing green mist and hits the ground. Groans. Pushes against that ground, trying to get back up. Where am I? What's my name? I remember nothing. Aren't babies born naked? He's got a dark blue button-down shirt on. A uniform? A shoulder patch. Gets up, looks around. I feel really heavy. I'm not that fat, am I? He picks up a small stone from the ground, this also feels heavier than it should. He rises to his feet and holds it out somewhat (he's unable to fully extend his arm) and lets it go. The stone hits the ground near his feet quickly and with remarkable speed. It's the gravity, it's greater than it is on- ...where am I from? This is- ...not my home planet? "Oooh..."
"Ka?" it says.
What is that? It's cute, at least.
It is not tame. He has no hope of catching it on foot. The creature seems to like the berries. Maybe if I gather some of those into one place and set some kind of trap...
33s: First trap.
I got one! The human lumbers up to the trap and gets the catch open. Do you bite? It doesn't matter much to me; I'm so friggin' screwed.
It doesn't. It looks at the human with a sense of wonder, actually. A blink and tilt of the head. Seems almost to be asking, Is it you? My purpose? My savior? Once out of the trap, which is totally wrecked, he has to make a new one from scratch, it follows him around like a imprinted hatchling bird.
Wiry little fella, you are. You're going to need some bulking up to do anything useful. The- ...'trimp', I guess... The trimp seems just barely able to feed itself. The human lets him into the broken ship's intact cabin, and it curls up comfortably in a passenger seat for a nap.
1m03s: Second trap.
"Apparently the Trimps breed if they're not working. Doesn't look pleasant."
What are they doing?
The trimps appear to be androgynous, and these two have paired off in the back of the ship. They're holding something carefully within a few hours, feeding it berries, grass, and- ...corundum.
Corundum?? Whatever that is, it isn't a baby.
1m35s: Third trap.
Only it IS a baby! The third trimp he trapped immediately joined the other two in raising it. They have a strange diet of food the human has found compatible with his own body, but they also eat rocks! They're careful to crush and sort aluminate minerals from silcate ones and only eat aluminate. Actually, they don't eat aluminate, they're only feeding it to the baby.
2m06s: Fourth trap.
All four are raising the same child, who is just starting to toddle. It seems these fellas have alumina or maybe even aluminum bones. The human takes a nap and wakes to find the first child grown up and they're starting to raise a second child, all five of them.
2m46s: Huts.
The human found a working bit of electronics. He calls it a pad, but maybe it's more like a smartphone. It has plans for two residential structures. The first, the smaller one, he can build right away, but the second one needs something called "drywall", and he has to figure out how to make that before he can build it. Huts and houses, apparently.
3m13s: 10 pop, full, first farmer.
The trimp he trained to farm and make paper took an incredible 50 units of food to get bulked up to do the work, and now it's not participating in rearing the child. But less than an hour after the trimp started farming and pulping, the child was out on its own, and the trimps did not start another. The ten seats on the ship were all full. Well, eleven counting the one up front that the human sleeps in. The pilot starts exploring the area.
3m28s: Battle.
Wait, what are you do-
The hostile roars and charges at the human, but one of his trimps jumps in front of him with a stick and they fight. It started right when the human got far enough away from the ship that the hostile non-trimps away from the ship began to regard him as leaving his own territory. After the trimp defeats the first enemy, it continues after other hostiles.
3m53s: Shield I in Z1c5.
The human is easily able to recover the loot in the territory cleared by the fighting trimp. Then he sees something glinting in the- That can't be! What the heck is that? It's a data card that fits his pad. It quite clearly regards trimp combat. He gets it loaded into his pad and studies it. I can do this, it just takes some wood. He returns to the ship to discover that they had already started on a new child before the fighter had even expired in battle. The human concentrates on his research.
4m38s: Mskel in Z1c11 defeated.
The remains of this one seem rather white and shiny. It's titanium! This enemy had titanium bones! He'll store them away. They'll be useful someday, I'm sure.
5m52s: Dagger I in Z1c20.
Where are these data cards coming from? The human wonders as he loads this one into his pad, It's for a weapon it calls a dagger. He blinks. I don't know what a dagger is. I'll take your word for it, data card. Needs metal. He has gathered some, but ore is plentiful. He can just dig and smelt it whenever he wants. For now, I'll continue researching.
6m18s: Arable in Z1c21.
It's an old cave that trimps like to live in. Why weren't they able to live there before? How could these friendly critters be confined to only the exact spot where THAT thing, he looks back where he came from, not remembering that he piloted the wrecked ship to its current resting place, crashed? This is really strange. I'll let them fill up this cave before advancing further. Wait, what about defenses? The hostiles never try to reclaim territory that they've lost, so he stops worrying about that fairly quickly.
8m22s: First hut is 0.3% first ever AP.
The trimps seem fairly easy to please in terms of living quarters. Two move into his first hut and start raising a child. The human has his tent, uniform, and the heater pilfered from his space suit. Not much of a mud fan.
9m59s: Miners in Z1c30.
Oh, what's on this data card? Sl3niw? Oh, I'm holding the pad upside down. Miners. I can teach trimps how to mine ores and smelt met- 200 units of food? Each job is getting more expensive to train a trimp for. He puts his bee nickels to his eyes and spots another data card probably 10 enemies away. "Sc"? Does that means science? I can teach trimps to do science??
13m57s: Scientists in Z1c40.
Due to the expense of training trimps, the human couldn't afford to build them shields until now, he's got Sh1-3 made for the fighter to capture the science training data card. 14m02s: One head went into that turtlimp shell, that of his fighter, but two came out: his fighter still has his head on, and he managed to get the turtlimp's head off. It rushes off after the deadly penguimp in the next cell. The shields are not doing all that much good, actually, but they're better than nothing. The human picks up and loads the science data card and- Holy runny sugar-free fudge crap! 1000 food units, but it'll endow them with the ability to speak. Good. I'm getting bored with no one to talk to.
14m28s: Bloodlust purchased and AutoFight enabled (that delay after getting it is an effect of jacking up the job cost.)
As the human buries this expired little trimp warrior, he comes to the sobering realization that he has more trimp graves in his growing trimp colony than he does live trimps. And yet they seem more hopeful now than before I got to know any of them. They seem to think I'm the solution to all their problems or- Those two look east somberly, then notice that he's watching them and smile back and wave at him. ...one problem that is specific, but very, very huge for them. [The only reason I say 'east' is because that's right on a map, and the game advances right across a row, then up. I might say 'northeast' on occasion for that reason.]
20m47s: Z1c73, Miners taken.
Are you my new mining foreman? The trimp who took to the mining training has dark brown fur that lays flat on its head. It's unusual in not having any bits that stick out from its head, ahoge or whatever. This one is relatively quiet, and while it has assimilated the mining and smelting knowledge, it needs to bulk up to do any mining. Smelting is relatively easy, and getting a strong natural draft going in a furnace is almost trivial with the increased gravity. This trimp builds furnaces like nothing. And likes to nap in holes it digs right on the spot; it's weird that way. [Puchim@s Yukipo, and furnaces are not explicit in Trimps.]
21m58s: Farming in Z1c80.
The resourcing "books" are not data cards but paper scrolls, apparently lost to the trimps. It seems that they were civilized in the recent past and some calamity swept over the planet to reduce them to this. Did I have something to do with it? Amnesia sucks harder than a Dyson- ...what's a Dyson? Whatever, it sucks. This disaster happening just before I crash in the only spot with trimps still alive would be a seriously crazy coincidence! Something is really, really wrong about all this. [The author has not sought or received product placement permission or fee from Dyson Technology Ltd. or any resellers of their stuff, just they literally suck balls and made my favorite vacuum cleaner.]
23m50s: Builder in Z1c90.
They've rescued an, I dunno, gelding trimp? It just started to build a shed around the piled lumber I left to build one. It's really slow compared to me, and just banged its thumb, but it is super cute with that long reddish head fur. That particular trimp is also fascinated with pink ribbons and likes to decorate its head fur with them. Because of its inherent inability to participate in rearing children, it isn't counted in the population. [Puchim@s Io, builder on the basis of Iori seen building in 1x10.]
26m02s: Zone 2, 44 pop, 5.5s RC with Z0/1.
It's some sort of tactical manual - tactical coordination. Coordination! He's starting to sort out some trimpese on the research he has done so far. It needs a lot of metal, so they won't be able to implement it for some time. Hopefully, they're still good one at a time, but these enemies seem to be getting bigger as we go along. Uh oh!
27m33s: Gym in Z2c5.
It's some sort of training dojo or sporting arena. The human examines the ruins, I think I can back-engineer drawings for this, get one built, and see what happens.
29m02s: 1g, 47 pop, 10.8s RC with Z1/2.
The two fighting trimps now with their gym and coordination are dodging and blocking enthusiastically, and making much faster ground against the bad guys then a little while ago when it was just one trimp fighting at a time and unable to avoid the enemy hitting back.
40m46s: Fresh turkimp in Z2c74, 63 pop, 7.9s RC, Sh1-10, Da1-5, Bo1-3, Ma1-3, Hm1-3, 6g.
Oh, wow, the laborers seem really hot after this turkimp. He cooks it up and tries a slice. It's really awesome! I have to work alongside his laboring trimps to share it, but I'm getting used to the gravity now. That scroll we found back in Z2c10 really helped. Trimps' techniques and appliances for handicapped individuals, and I'm really handicapped in this higher gravity. He joins the woodcutters with the turkimp; they're the most numerous resource laborer right now, building more gyms, enough that the block/dodge ability of the fighting trimps is almost caught up to the enemy's ability to cause damage.
43m15s: Zone 3, 63 pop, 7.9s RC with Z1/2.
I'm neglecting my science and trimp scientists are really expensive. Curiously, that grey-haired one can't speak all that well, only says "Tai" and "Shijou", but it can write and draw like nobody's business. It's the only scientist so far. [Puchim@s Takanya: Online references probably still claim that she can utter the first two syllables of any word, but she can actually utter only the first two kana syllables of someone's name, most often the given name of basis human Takane Shijou, who also has that habit. (All the utterances of the puchidoru are based on the speech foibles of their basis humans except maybe Piyopiyo, where I haven't seen anything match up so far.)]
47m32s: Finally, we can make drywall and houses. 59m30s: Z3c77, 94 pop, 7.8s RC.
Oh, those poor things are really struggling up at the front. These trimps are enthusiastic and know no fear, but I still feel like telling them to stop for a while. I don't have the heart to keep them from trying while they're still doing some damage.
1h05m24s: Zone 4, 107 pop, 9.3s RC with Z3/4. 1h15m26s: Zone 5, 120 pop, 8.2s RC with Z3/4.
"What is that?" the human asks. He has three scientists. His first does all the writing, but the other two can actually speak. One of them hops up on a rock spire beside the human to reach his eye level.
At the next ridge line, over the lowest and most passable gap in the terrain, this really mean looking hovering sausage monster.
"I dunno," the scientist trimp shrugs, "But it's making me hungry. Looks like a perfectly cooked frankfurter from here." [John Morell's dubious dirigibles.]
"Oh, yeah," the human nods, "that's a blimp."
"A blimp?" the trimp tilts its head quizzically at the human, "How could you know?"
"I wish I could tell you, little buddy," the human extends his arm braces to descend the pass on the side of the zone boundary in the boss enemy's direction, then grunts, "Let's go kill it."
1h16m11s: Z1c9, 120 pop, 10.3s RC with Z4/5. 1h33m34s: Zone 6, 151 pop, 7.4s RC with Z4/5.
1h33m54s: TP in Z1c3.
"What's this?" the human asks, having picked up the little square document with the curling corners.
"Oh," the hungry scientist looks at it, "It's a garden path, follow me."
"You want to lead me down the garden path?" the human says.
"Yeah," the scientist says.
"Are you kidding?" the human asks.
"No," says the other scientist, "We don't get human humor. Listen, these fighters can't go, let them wear themselves out here, then we'll take the next group through this garden."
"Okay," the human nods, watching two more trimps join the fray as he issues the Z5 coordination orders, "they're doing pretty well after all that block training research we just wrapped up." [That's a common artifact, even in normal games, Z5 Traintacular combines with many gyms, enough population to add several trainers, affording Blockmaster, which is expensive on a run zero, plus a break on Tion Z5, a 40% all-stat increase. I don't think Zach designed it into the game on purpose, it just worked out this way.]
1h34m07s: 151 pop, 10.5s RC with Z5/7. 1h37m44s: Drop from Z6c39, TP for 3.
"Now we have these access map frags we can use to route through the old trimpopoli," the scientist explains, "Atlimpis for food, Morimpa for gems, Everimp for metal, and Impazon for wood."
"What about the garden?" the human asks.
"Well, we got lucky with Tricky Paradise," the scientist says, "but you can randomize the route and maybe get lucky. What's with that look?"
"Somehow, I'm remembering 'frag' as something that blew up with deadly pieces," the human says. [Different video games - ones with better graphics and worse gameplay Ｏ(>▽<)Ｏ]
1h39m59s: Blues back up to the top on series I...
"Tai, Tai!" the first ever trimp scientist stops the human just before he upgrades the mace and dagger to Mk.6 and Mk. 8 respectively. It has a note for him.
"Why do you keep calling me that?" the human asks, "Do you think that's my name?"
"Shijou, Shijou," it nods as though to indicate, I KNOW it is. Then it proffers its note again. The human takes it and reads, "Don't upgrade the first row equipment right now."
"Why not?" the human asks.
"Shijou," it points at the end of the mapped route, where there's a scroll sticking out of the thistles.
2h24m07s: Zone 8, 224 pop, 12.2s RC with Z7/12.
"Your settlement is getting crowded, there's Trimps in the streets, and you're taking heat. You feel a sudden strong desire to create a map, though you're not quite sure how that would help."
2h49m10s: Zone 9, 357 pop, 9.5s RC with Z8/15.
"You can't shake the feeling that you've been here before. Déjà-vu?"
The trimps really seem to like the new high capacity mansions, and the village has rapidly expanded since they started building them.
"There's something familiar about this," the human says.
"Tai," the grey one that writes clings to his arm and shows him a note that says, "Don't give up now."
"We must persist," says the yellow one has found a foothold it can grab onto and grabs the human's shoulder gently, "If you give up to early, we'll never solve this. You'll be stuck here forever."
The human puts his hand over the trimp's paw on his shoulders, then looks at him, "I can die, too."
"No, you can't," the trimp says quietly, "Please don't test that, tall one."
"Death is just another path..." he remembers.
"Gan," the grey one squeaks. [That's the first two kana syllables of "Gandalf"]
"...one that we all must take," the human continues, "The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it-"
"A green mist," the yellow trimp interrupts, "flash of fire, we're all gone and our progress forgotten. The wandering stars return to that day, and you again crash that ship- ...a little better every time."
"Wait," the human looks around, "have I been here before?"
"I-" the yellow trimp tries in futility to share what little it knows, "...or... somebody got just a little coolant into the-"
"Into the what?"
"This side up," the grey one's note says.
"Into the that," the yellow one points at the note, "It really helped. You- ...I don't think we've ever had mansions before."
Well, of course they didn't have mansions before. That was one of my ship's data cards. How did it get way out here? Will anything start to make sense?
3h02m13s: Zone 10, 387 pop, 8.7s RC with Z8/15; '28s: 11.1s RC with Z9/19. 3h16m41s: Tough snimp after food book, L10 rand dept from lo-hi-med 118/25/96, 4 Items.
"That's twice our frags led us to gem-rich Moria," the human says.
"Morimpa," the new red trimp scientist corrects, there now being 5 scientists. [There'd be more if there were more turkimp.]
"The question is how do we use all these gems?" the human looks at the village zoning plans again, "I like those mansions and all, but they use hardly any gems compared to, well-" he gestures at the pile of over two dozen thousand gems they've gathered, "-that! And still a lot of wood and lumber."
"I think there's something," the yellow one sighs, "I wish I knew more."
Quite some time later, after they're done looting that route for equipment plans, the trimps are again advancing through Zone 10, and he hears it.
"Tai?" the grey one wonders.
"Where are you going?" the yellow one asks.
"To the farm," the human answers.
"Whatever for?" the red one seems exasperated.
"Shijou?" the grey one sighs, then looks at the fighting front. It's been around long enough to remember, "Shijou!"
"You guys already get so much to eat this doesn't do you much good," the human explains.
3h32m33s: L11 112/35/78 rand sea, dropped from Z11c6 with disband, 4.
"What's wrong?" the red one asks.
The human comforts one of the wounded. Once trimps start into a zone fight, they have to finish before they bleed out. He's really bothered making them desert in front of that second turkimp. "They had a lot left in them," he sighs, rubbing his eyes, "but we can't keep that much dead turkimp at once, we have to leave it alive to use up all of this one."
"Shijou," the grey one presents a note, "We need this map right away, anyway. Don't worry about it, Tightniks."
"Tightniks?" he looks at the grey one, "Is that me? How do you know?"
"Tai," the grey one points at the top of the human's left breast pocket.
"Ah, crud," the yellow one curls its tail around in front of itself as trimps do when they're embarrassed, "Is that really a name tag?"
The human hadn't even noticed it since the green flash blew up his memory as he was stepping out of the ship.
4h04m22s: Block (sub-8h AP is only 0.3%), taking it, 504 pop, 9.8s RC with Z10/24.
It's a pretty thick book about using shields for block instead of hit points. The pad has the stats analysis. Sh3-1 is only giving us 9% of our hit points. Turning to his trimp scientists, he says, "It seems to me to be worth it."
"Let's," the yellow one nods.
"Shijou," it hands him a note, "It scales badly, but that won't matter for a long time. I think there's a way to undo it before it matters."
"Doing it." The human takes out his pad and starts scanning.
4h29m05s: L14 rand moun 137/26/80 is really good for a lo-hi-med. 4h30m52s: Hotels.
"Ah," the yellow one says, "I knew there was something. That must be it."
5h08m09s: L15 lo-hi-hi rand gard 129/28/82 (just got explorers). 5h09m32s: Picked up Wall.
"Dam," the human says.
"Damn?" the red one chuckles.
"No," the human says, "Earthen wall dam; it's a thing that makes artificial lakes by holding rivers back."
"Lakes?" the yellow one asks, "Rivers?"
"Oh yeah," the human says, "This planet doesn't have enough rain for those..."
5h48m21: Leaving Wall from about c70 to fetch Tion Z15.
"You can't resume the map from the same point if you start another," the human reads the grey one's note.
"We can go back to the same point on that route if we hold there and finish Zone 15, right?" Tightniks asks.
"Shijou!" it seems to be saying yes.
"Yes," the yellow one adds, "but we're out of Series III upgrades, and you need a fresh map route to start up Series IV."
"We should be okay," Tightniks says, "but if we have to start it over, I don't see that being a big deal." As they advance through the rest of Zone 15, Tightniks resumes his usual duties at the research desk instead building and running traps like he was before.
The trimps seem hopeful at this decision.
5h49m10s: Fresh turkimp. 5h50m16s: Zone 16, 1071 pop, 13.4s RC with Z15/75, 13m43s turkimp (skel in c1.)
"Z:16 Seriously? Another Blimp so soon?"
"So," Tightniks lowers his bee nickels and looks at the red one, "is it going to be boss fights at the end of every zone from now on?"
"Hmm," the red trimp looks up past the human at some random rock spire or cloud.
"Well?" the human persists.
"Yup," he says.
"Hmph," Tightniks grabs a Sw3-1 of the rack and advances towards the front, "Before then, we have another Mister Titanium."
"What does he like about skeletimps?" the red one asks the grey one as the human marches off.
"Shijou?" the grey one seems just as confused by that.
"He's not going back to the ship, and he's not getting himself killed," the yellow one smiles, "so I'll take it."
5h58m32s...
"Hey guys, go for the mortar!" the human suggests to his 75 fighting trimps in the Wall's boss fight.
"I can tell from your bedtime stories that you're used to the artillery in that other place," the yellow one gripes, "but fighting works differently here, there's no artillery."
And the human instantly collapses laughing, the scientists a little worried he might have injured himself in the planet's severe gravity. But he's okay, at least physically, "Mortar is the stuff between the bricks, fellas. That's is a brickimp, right?"
5h59m18s: Wall, 1076 pop, 13.3s RC, 1% AP for sub-8h finish, first L16 roll good 156/35/84 moun, 10 for the metal.
Beyond the Wall was a more edenic section of the trimpolis ruins, doubling the production of the lumberjacks. The trimps are actually really happy with the mode of all of the laborers moving between the three big jobs, along with the turkimp, except for the foremen specialized at leading the job. It isn't enough to boost their productivity, but the human goes to them with trays of sandwiches.
6h06m52s: 50 map run 0.3% AP...
6h19m13s: Zone 17, 1141 pop, 16.0s RC with Z16/94, no turkimp.
"Z:17 You climb a large cliff and look out over the new Zone. Red dirt, scorched ground, and devastation. Is that a Dragimp flying around out there?!"
"Hmm," the human surveys the new zone with his bee nickels, "Looks like crap. Any ideas?"
"You're the idea man," the yellow one groans.
"Set the map flag," he puts his bee nickels away, "We'll run a depth for practice and to load up on gems for more hotels."
"Righto," the red one gets to work.
6h44m34s: First DCP. (Draglimp Care Package; I refuse to call it a tribute.)
"Oh," the human says, "It's tame now, so it brings back gems in exchange for food?" He looks at his gaping scientists, "That's what it looks like, huh? Guys? Yo!"
"Tai..." the grey one sighs.
Draglimp, the dragimp imprinted on Tightniks, lands beside the human, drops some gems at his feet, and accepts some scratching behind its horns before diving into the food bowl.
"You tamed a dragimp???" Grey's note says.
"Well," the yellow one huffs, "I guess that happened."
8h18m53s: L20 depth of 154/27/79.
"Mapping up here?" the red one half closes one eye and tilts his head.
"Yeah," the human says while fitting together the depth map fragments, "With the coordination book not right at the end, we have an extra mark of coordination to take advantage of. Let's take our housing up to 2000 or so, shall we?"
"Okay," the yellow one says from a pile of logs, "What's all the wood for?" They had been collecting it for days now.
"The series upgrades follow a rather specific pattern," Tightniks explains, "Just on the other side of this blimp is Zone 21, where we should be able to find the Shield series V, right?"
"Shijou!" the grey one nods.
8h56m17s: 1% AP for 100 map runs, leaving it, 1751 pop, 24.8s RC with Z20/232. 8h56m54s: Zone 21...
"Ooooookay," Tightniks growls, "There is something off about this thing."
"Shijou?" the grey one looks at the yellow one with concern about their human starship pilot friend.
The human stoops, picks up the little green gem on the ridge between Zone 20 and 21, looks at it, huffs, and asks, "Any idea where this comes from?"
"Err..." the red one seems hesitant to say, "I think you made it."
"Really?" the human huffs, "How could that be?" Then he tosses it at Red, "See if anything reacts to it. It might be radioactive, so we should take turns to minimize exposure."
"Really?" Red's holding it now, "What makes you say that?"
"Because I'm pissed off for no reason I can figure out," the human says, "I think it's coming from that."
"Frags," the red one says quickly, "I think it's arranging a route. You're good with maps," it tosses the gem to the grey scientist.
"Shijou," the grey one says hopefully, and has a map drawn within a few minutes. [Whether it looks like the one in Puchim@s 1x61 is anyone's guess. That one annoyed me as well as Chihya.]
9h02m37s: L21 moun first roll was a decent 160/26/84. 9h21m00s: Starting run 5 of that map...
Tightniks had taken his anger out on some food and wood to build about 8000 traps. Now he's leaning against a rock spire in his increasingly tattered uniform. A nap begins, perhaps unintentionally.
Wild trimps are examining the pile, finding it unwelcoming, and also finding no place in the town, just mill about. It looks like they want to help.
"Ku?" it's a blue trimp, probably a farmer waiting for stuff to grow, climbs up on the rock spire the human is leaning against, starts patting him on the head, "Ku. Ku ku." [Puchim@s Chihya.]
9h23m09s: Still working that lap...
Tightniks wakes up from that nap, and the grey one is standing there. "Shijou," it says with a note of concern, although not much of one. The note it holds says, "It wasn't me."
"Oh, what wasn't you, buddy?" He stretches out a bit, feeling somewhat refreshed. It feels like somebody washed his face and hair while he was sleeping.
The grey one is also holding a small mirror, apparently broken off from a larger mirror and with the sharp edges filed down to make the edges safe.
The human takes it from the grey trimp and holds it in front of his face to discover that somebody has bound up all his hair into about twenty little pigtails. He touches them with his other hand to confirm. "Eh, whatever." He hands the mirror back and goes back to sleep. [Puchim@s Koamimami.]
9h30m08s: The following run...
"He's not throwing stuff every which way yet," the yellow one whispers to the red one, watching the human snoozing with his pad on his knee.
"You remember that, too?" the red one asks.
"'Remember'?" the yellow one turns to face the red one, "I s'pose that's better than imagining it."
"I remember it, too," the grey one says via a playing card sized note.
"If we're stuck in a time loop," the yellow one sighs, "maybe this cycle will be different."
"Tai..." the grey one admires him for a moment. Then thumbs in the direction of the mountain, "Heh, Shijou!" it laughs.
9h35m58s: Run 8, c9 of that map.
The scientists nap and take notes, and meditate and take notes, and draw stuff. The grey one often storyboards for the other nine because it's the best at drawing stuff. They have come up with a list, and most probably "order" (they're debating whether their ranking means "order" (sequence of things happening over the various loops) or "frequency" (what proportion of previous loops they have happened in). But they've come up with this, from first (or perhaps most often) to most recent (or perhaps least often):
- The ship crashes (they're pretty sure that happens every loop) - The human builds huts - The human teaches some of his trimps to speak and do science - The human builds houses - The human makes maps - The human builds mansions - The human blows up and gets himself killed somewhere around Z17 to Z21, often on a dragimp - The human only recently/occasionally builds hotels - The human only recently/rarely tamed a dragimp - The human only recently/rarely maps the Dimension of Anger
They're all agreed that that they have never finished the Dimension of Anger. What they are not all agreed on is that they've never done this conference to figure out whether they're in a time loop or what that might mean. [See also Star Trek: The Next Generation episode "Cause and Effect" ...which was sort of a time loop but they weren't going back in time. It's very interesting, but its meta makes no sense - no one ever went looking for the Bozeman in 80 years? No one who went looking for the Bozeman also got stuck? No one noticed the passage of time outside the little area of space where the not-quite-a-time-loop was happening? Errr... sci-fi writers, don't be half-assed about your time loops, lmao! Be like Harold Ramis- ...what am I saying?? (That would be Groundhog Day, which grafted a time loop into a romcom; there are no other sci-fi elements. But it was a full-blown time loop and not half-assed like "Cause and Effect".)]
9h54m06s: Dropped from Z21c95...
I think it would be a bad idea to bypass that green area, as much as I'd rather not face it. Both his domesticated trimps, which are breeding up a new group of fighters, and the wild trimps he has decided just now not to open the traps for, stare at him and point in that direction. He shoulders a huge Shield V-3 and grabs an Mace IV-2 as well and announces, "We're doing it." Thus equipped, he marches off into the Dimension of Anger.
10h27m53s: Taking Pi4-2; recently had taken Pa4-2...
The group at the front had expired, and the snimp in DoAc95 glares at the advancing colony of trimps, which had halted only because of it. It refuses to counterattack the vulnerable colony and its human, instead snorting and huffing, waiting for the next bunch of 232 fighting trimps to come in range.
Tightniks runs along the line of traps, releasing the recently tamed trimps, singing a song that he doesn't remember the meaning of, that he doesn't remember was crafted by an ethnically Chinese guy out of an African language, and later mastered by two caucasians over the internet before they ever met in person. "Baba yetu yetu uliye, mbinguni yetu yetu amina..." because it just happened to be stuck in his head. [Because the Doylian author decided on a whim to. Christopher Tin got it into Civilization IV and at the time (2010 July), I made the best video for it on YouTube, which got subsequently blown to shreds when Peter Hollens and Malukah re-recorded the song from scratch in their own voices and instruments in 2014, pity with no English translation, the purpose of my video.]
Noticing the last batch of metal he needs coming out of the furnace, he waves the waiting grey scientist to fire up the forge [to use the term properly and not as the game does], for it was time to wrap up the forging dies for the Spetum IV, Mark 2 pike heads.
"Shijou!" the grey one cheers, setting aside a snack that looks like maybe ramen, and starts jumping up and down on the bellows handle.
It takes a while for the human to chip out the tip in the two halves of the forging die, and then polish it, and then heat it up in the forge, and then quench it, inspect it, and put it into service crafting thousands of new pike heads for the fighting trimps.
But only one second passed on the map frame clock (10h27m54s) four cells behind that snimp, in the case being brooded over by this huge, and if it's honest, rather concerned megablimp.
10h35m45: Portal PB, 45 He, 4.247 He/hr, 1891 pop, 22.7s RC with Z20/232, no turkimp.
The last head of the map's boss monster goes limp as one of the fighting trimps' mace heads bounces of it, and the huge thing settles on its tail, resting on the package that seems to be the prize of this map. And there's a popping sound, and then something mechanical.
Is that a scroll compressor? Tightniks looks at the package. The deflating monster's lifting envelope material drapes over everything underneath it. "Red, Shijou!" he snaps and points, "roll up that side of it. Keep this part from sucking down on the extractor nozzle!"
All ten of the scientists jump in, literally, pushing the gas in the bag towards the compressor. Tightniks as well, rolling up the front.
Until he kicks, and nearly trips over, a smaller package that might be the explanation for the reason why the center of the monster's defense seemed to be a little away from the big package he could see. It's in the right place, he realizes. He gets it uncovered and reads stenciled-and-sprayed block letters on it:
"DT TIME PORTAL / THIS SIDE DOWN"
Perhaps the Dimension of Anger is so named because of the rage suddenly rising up in Tightniks' throat. It isn't so much as the free-floating aggression suddenly has an answer, there is definitely a fresh batch of rage and anger as he grips the nearest Mace IV, Mark 3 with both hands and gets it over his shoulder, its target obviously this object, anger at the realization he screams at the top of his lungs, "We are stuck in a mutha FAH-king time loop!!" His swing begins. [Tightniks almost never cusses, unlike Snugniks.]

Hello everyone! This is my first time doing any sort of homebrew revisions, so I would like your input, but please be gentle.
I feel as though the Wild Magic sorcerer, while excellent in concept and can be very fun, could stand to have some better features and a better way to implement Surges. So, I made the following features below:
Level 1
Wild Magic Surge (Changed) Starting at first level, you gain a Surge Die, which is a d6. Once per turn when you cast a spell of first level or higher, you can choose to roll on the Surge Die.
If you roll a 1 on the Surge Die, roll on the Wild Magic Surge table to create a magical effect. If that effect is a spell, it is too wild to be affected by your Metamagic, and if it normally requires concentration, it doesn't require concentration in this case; the spell lasts for its full duration.
However, if you roll a 6 on the Surge Die, in addition to rolling on the Wild Magic Surge table as before, you gain a number of Sorcery Points equal to your proficiency bonus up to the maximum available to you at that level (if you go over the maximum, the extra points are ignored).
Tides of Chaos Starting at 1st level, you can manipulate the forces of chance and chaos to gain advantage on one attack roll, ability check, or saving throw. Once you do so, you must finish a long rest before you can use this feature again.
If you wish to regain the use of this feature anytime before you finish a long rest, you must roll on the Wild Magic Surge table immediately after you cast a sorcerer spell of 1st level or higher. You then regain the use of this feature.
Level 6
Help or Hinder (Change Name?) When you or another creature you can see makes an attack roll, an ability check, or a saving throw, you can use your reaction to roll your Surge Die to apply a 1d4 bonus or penalty (your choice) to the creature’s roll.
If you roll a 4, 5, or 6 on your Surge Die, your choice of a bonus or penalty works as intended. This does not trigger the benefits of rolling a 6 in the Wild Magic Surge feature.
However, if you roll a 1, 2, or 3 on your Surge Die, the opposite effect of your choice occurs. For example, if you roll a 3 on your Surge Die and you chose to apply a 1d4 bonus to the creature’s roll, it becomes a 1d4 penalty.
Level 14
Maximized Surge When you would roll on your Surge Die, you can choose to gain the effects of rolling a 6 on the die. You can do this a number of times up to your proficiency bonus per long rest.
Level 18
Controlled Chaos When you would roll on the Wild Magic Surge Table, you can roll twice and choose which effect you want. You can then choose to either:

1. change the target of your effects from being centered on yourself to another creature that you can see, or
   
2. you can choose a number of creatures that you can see equal to your Charisma Modifier to be protected from the effects. If the effect requires a saving throw, they automatically succeed with no damage if they would take half damage. If it would deal damage to them, then they would take no damage instead.
   

You can do this a number of times equal to your proficiency bonus per long rest.
Let me know if you have any questions.

Hello fellow Brisbanians!

It's (almost) that time of week again. What are you doing this weekend?
Looks like it's market week across Brisbane. Some markets have specified being cashless. Some may ask for a gold coin donation - it's always wise to take *some* cash/change to a market day.
Personal pick of the week has to be the The Temporary Route Tour by the Transport Museum - I'm an anorak at heart. Don't forget to take a Boogie Break this Saturday afternoon. Boys - Free Men's BBQ at New Farm Park on Sunday. Get warmed up for the weekend with Women's Origin this Thursday.
The German word for art is 'kunst'. Gave my year 9 German class a chuckle. Check out the German Film Festival at Palace Cinemas until the 29th of May.
Every suburb has it's own local. They often have their own itinerary of weekly things to do. Trivia, Karaoke - things like that. Is your local a cut above the rest? Let us know in the comments!
As always, feedback is welcome and if I have missed your event (likely!) please let us know in the comments.
There's not much going on Thursday - not true, I just need to look harder and get back to you. LGBTQIA+ Event List Last Week's List

Friday

What: Ipswich Show Where: Ipswich Showgrounds When: Fri, Sat, Sun Price: From $25 Adult Ticket: https://www.ipswichshow.com.au/purchase-tickets
What: Local's Weekend Where: Brighton Hotel When: Fri - Sun Bookings Recommended - https://brightonhotelmotel.com.au/events/locals-weekend/
What: Town and Country - Country Music Festival Where: Regatta Hotel - 543 Coronation Drive When: Fri 1500 - Sun 2000 Price: Free Entry https://regattahotel.com.au/events/town-and-country/
What: Brazilian Styles Dance Workshop Where: 163 Boundary Street, West End When: Fri 1930 - 2330 Price: from $10 Tickets: https://www.eventbrite.com.au/e/friday-night-mixed-brazilian-styles-social-night-with-samba-workshop-tickets-894096866797
What: Hanksy Motorcycles and Hans Coffee Cup Cafe Where: 13/58 Bullockhead St, Sumner When: Fri - 1730 - 2130 Price: Free
What: Brookfield Show Where: Brookfield Showground When: Fri 0900 - Sun 1800 Price: From $30 Tickets: https://www.brookfieldshow.com.au/shop/

Saturday

What: Paniyiri Greek Festival Where: Musgrave Park When: Sat 1200 - Sun 2100 Price: From about $17 Ticket: https://tickets.paniyiri.com/outlet/event/a293ee70-d8d1-4da4-9201-a170f6f385d2
What: Distillery Road Market Where: 124 Distillery Road, Eagleby When: Sat 0900 - Sun 1600 Price: From $18 Ticket: https://www.thecollectorsmarket.com.au/event-details/the-collectors-market-may-2024
What: CaBBaret Shine Bright Like A Diamond Where: The Rosie Theatre When: Sat 1800 - 2200 Price: From $25 Ticket: https://events.humanitix.com/cabbaret-shine-bright-like-a-diamond
What: Warehouse Clearance Furniture Sale Where: 72 Donaldson Rd. Rocklea When: Sat 0900 - Sun 1600 Price: Free Ticket: None
What: What We Design Market Where: Coorparoo Square When: Sat 0900 - 1300 Price: ? Ticket: None
What: Doggo Day Where: Vend Virginia When: Sat 0900 - 1300 Price: ? Ticket: None
What: Food Truck Night Market Where: Mt Gravatt Showgrounds When: Sat 1600 - 2100 Price: $3 Adult Entry Ticket: On the door
What: A Night At The Museum Where: QLD Museum When: Sat 1715 - 2030 Price: Family Tickets $115 - Cashless Event Ticket: https://qm.t.qtix.com.au/qm/events/018a4549-e927-08f4-a97e-5ea613e044b0
What: Carseldine Market Where: 532 Beams Road, Carseldine When: Sat - 0600 - 1200 Price: ? Ticket: None, probably
What: Pawfect Day on the Green - My Crosby Markets Where: 770 Mount Crosby Road When: Sat 0900 - 1400 Price: ? Ticket: None
What: The Temporary Route Tour - Transport Museum Where: Muller Road, Adelaide St or Gympie Rd When: Sat - 0715 Price: $20pp - Bring lunch money Ticket: Call QOCS Member Peter Donaro on 0476 838 012
What: Modern Jive in the Wild Where: Kangaroo Point Lower River Terrace When: Sat 1430 - 1730 Price: FREE Ticket: Come and go as you please
What: Southside Collective Markets Where: 270 Kelvin Grove When: Sat 0800 - 1200 Price: ?
What: Slow Food Market Where: 44 Wolverhampton St, Stafford When: Sat 0730 - 1200 Price: ?
What: Cars and Coffee Where: 107 Fison Ave, Eagle Farm When: Sat - 0630 Price: ?
What: Weaving is Healing - Two Day Workshop Where: 152 Mt. Coot Tha, Mt. Coot Tha When: Sat - 1030 - Sun - 1530 Price: $220 Tickets: https://www.eventbrite.com.au/e/weaving-is-healing-two-day-weekend-workshop-brisbane-part-1-tickets-849242526257
What: Ars Nova to Impressionism - One Equal Music Where: St. Brigids Church When: Sat - 1900 Price: U30 $30 - Adults $60 Tickets: https://www.trybooking.com/events/landing/1177930
What: Clay Class and Speed Dating - BYO - AGE: 25-37 Where: Wesley Taylor Art Studios When: Sat - 1830 Price: $49 Tickets: https://ignitesocialbrisbane.com.au/event/clayspeeddating/
What: Napoleon Champagne Dinner Where: TAMA Dining, 740 Ann St When: Sat 1900 - 2200 Price: From $299 Tickets: https://events.humanitix.com/napoleon-champagne-dinner
What: TeamMoto Kawasaki Demo Day Where: 2 Kensal St, Moorooka When: Sat 1000 - 1400 Price: ? Tickets: https://www.teammoto.com.au/blog/teammoto-kawasaki-demo-days/6669/
What: Lions vs Richmond When: Sat Where: The Gabba Tickets: https://thegabba.com.au/Events/Brisbane-Lions-v-Richmond-(2).aspx.aspx)

Sunday

What: Free BBQ for Men Where: New Farm Park When: Sun 1030 - 1200 Price: Free Ticket: None. RSVP FB Event: https://www.facebook.com/events/1002051341045618/1002051371045615/?active_tab=about
What: Valampuri's Exhibition & Sale Where: Darra Motel & Conference Centre When: Sun 0930 - 1600 Price: Free Ticket: None - RSVP FB Event: https://www.facebook.com/events/1175219386750361/
What: Main Street Orion - Springfield Markets Where: Orion Springfield Central When: Sun 0900 Price: ? Ticket: None
What: Japanese Sunday Market Where: 123 Charlotte St When: Every Sunday from 1000 Price: Free Ticket: None
What: The Curated Market Where: Floor 10, 53 Vernon Tce, Teneriffe When: Sun 0800 - 1100 Price: $5 Cashless Event Ticket: On the door
What: Suitcase Rummage Where: Brisbane Square When: Sun 1200 - 1700 Price: Free to attend Ticket: None (as buyer)
What: Vintage Exchange Market Where: 102 McDonald Road, Windsor When: Sun 0900 - 1400 Price: ? Cash Welcome
What: Slowly Made Locals Market Where: 37 Collingwood Street, Albion When: Sun 0800 - 1500 Price: ? Ticket: None, probably
What: Winter Warmers Pop-Up - I Want A Greyhound Where: 9 Saint Amand St, Sinnamon Park When: Sun - 0900 Price: ? Ticket: None
What: Her Wardrobe Markets Where: Mt Gravatt Showgrounds When: Sun 0800 - 1200 Price: Free Ticket: None, www.herwardrobe.com for more info
What: PX Model Swap and Sell Where: Albany Creek State School When: Sun - 0900 - 1300 Price: $5 Entry / $25 Sellers Ticket: Contact https://www.facebook.com/ipmsqld
What: CavRoad Markets Where: 12 Cavendish Road When: Sun 0700 - 1300 Price: Free - Parking Available Ticket: None
What: Adoption Day at PetBarn Where: 2021 Wynnum Road, Shop B4, Wynnum Plaza When: Sun - 1000 - 1500 Price: Free
What: Bowl Carving Workshop - SOLD OUT Where: Armoured Heaven, Station Road, Yeerongpilly When: Sun - 1300 - 1600 Price: $160 Tickets: https://plantempire.com.au/collections/workshops/products/bowl-carving-workshop-19-may-2024
What: Walking in Wartime Where: Museum of Brisbane When: Sun - 1030 - 1200 Price: $25 Adult Tickets: https://www.museumofbrisbane.com.au/whats-on/walking-in-wartime/
What: Redcliffe Markets - Stone Tree Collection Where: 79 Redcliffe Pde When: Sun 0800 - 1400 Price: ?
What: Little Monsters @ Netherworld Where: Netherworld, Fortitude Valley When: Sun 930 - 1130 Price: $10p/p Tickets: https://www.netherworldarcade.com/event/little-monsters-3/
What: UQ Social Runners Club Where: New Farm Park When: Sun - 0700 Price: ? Tickets: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScY8N9vovDDEpSPqSn-_FWObazs58r6j-0qhrwLowOrfwGZOA/viewform
What: Spice World Where: New Farm Cinema When: Sun - 1600 Price: $14 - $19 Tickets: https://www.fivestarcinemas.com.au/new-farm/movie/spice-world-the-movie

the suicidal
step out
into death
who am i to judge ?
for what eternity holds
no-one knows
the low reading aged
if you write something they can’t understand
then according to them
its your fault
so they reject
this is the path of mediocrity
and cretinism
all religions schism, narratives of homogeneity require force to maintain (which can be extremely brutal historically)
Knock Out Asinine Nits
photos
staring out from a smooth granite block
if not quizzical
then should be
stuck in eternity
like that
somewhere
there must be a couple that mesh
and get along with each other
somewhere
i’m gone
the world rolls on
i disappear
and appear
the pages of a book that flick through
some words rest
and others don’t
skimming stones
eventually
stop
and sink
rhoticity explained to me, i now understand it, but otherwise i wouldn’t have had a clue except for the joking use of irish, scottish, canadian or usa accents
i think the zen term "seamless monument" is a metaphor for reality, you can’t penetrate it, there’s no artefact of manufacture since it has no seam, it can only be traversed, which btw is the basic philosophical problem of existence, there is no "inner" reality that subsumes "the detail of being"
“ I m currently 16 years old and a "child prodigy". I started university at 14. I have thus far only received one grade which was not an A+. It was an A-. I have memorized 100 digits of pi, the periodic table, and most of the Dungeons & Dragons rulebooks. I am learning Latin, Ancient Greek, Biblical Hebrew, Sahidic Coptic, Spanish, and Italian. I just like old languages. I don’t have to study long — I have a nearly photographic memory. When I do study, I just write things out over and over. I am a very visual thinker, so I remember pictures. Ask me anything ! ”
ed. she also has ehlers-danlos syndrome and is ADHD
in my view, the languages are a big mistake, they interfere with each other
“ Why do you think that ? ”
the languages you list are particularly disjunctive its a heavy learning burden with heaps of "opportunity costs" and the skill is becoming increasingly redundant with AI translators
also my experience of polyglots is they get damaged in some way
the brain is not infinitely capable, beware of burning it in waste of time activities, which to be honest a lot of so called education is
dr. alan cole argues that zen masters are in fact "made-over" daoist sages
i would go further and say that the koan system involves the same sort of "puzzling process" as the tao te ching
when you hear this sort of crap from the policy making elites, no wonder china is a problem !
the real impact of the one child policy may be the scarcity of anyone at the higher levels of government or policy being able to think straight
of course, this is to the advantage of the west and is the same problem japan had in WW2, idiots determining their strategic direction
boundaries crossing
abatement of being
from this perspective
everything looks crazy
really ?
do you ever listen to anything outside your own echo chamber ?
sad souls
in the twilight of their lives
mumbling gibberish
the words of others
are not your own
if you actually understood
why wouldn’t you use your own words ?
time separates
that childhood intensity
fades
as the branches grow apart
what was not seen at the time
is now seen
you are not well read and have an "anti-creative" mindset !
i’m getting on in years and just can’t be bothered to deal with your hubris
good-bye
ed. the net is full of these entitled gen Z’ers with a deeply entrenched intellectual inertia created by a malfunctioning education system
valves, muscle, connective tissue, timing
easy to see how it can go wrong as we get older
this dynamic core of existence in the center of our chests where every beat needs to be followed by another
i think religion can be regarded as a hallucination, the hallucination being that a literary work is real, perhaps most easily seen in the beliefs of ancient egypt, what are the pyramids and all those smaller tombs about ?
the reification of stories
these people
who
rather than bringing something to the table
only
take
and
are
impertinent
with
it
the puzzle of the poetry of others
seems to need the conversion
into something
i understand
"the girl on a bulldozer" (2022), a good tightly written kdrama
caodong poetry 23; verses on master fushan’s sixteen themes #4; touzi; translated by suru

1. not falling into life or death

on the day when the golden rooster heralds the coming spring
the jade hare conceives, entering the purple palace
reeds bloom on both shores, shadowing egrets
an old fisherman lifts his oar, dispersing mist, returning home
.
不落死活。 金雞日裏報春時。 玉兔懷胎入紫微。 兩岸蘆華映白鷺。 漁翁舉棹撥煙歸。
.
my reply
one day
the distance travelled
catches up with you
and you have arrived
.
one day
the distance travelled
catches up with you
you
have
arrived
ed. the terms in suru’s translation are very chinese and have a historical perspective, so i have "reworked" it into something modern that people will understand
“ ChatGPT-4 scored higher than 100% of psychologists on a test of social intelligence ”
hilarious
a tui calls
stunning the silence
my day is filled
with melody
ed. the tui is a new zealand native songbird
if you have ever attempted to count the number words in a book or whatever, which i have, count the number in a couple of paragraphs, then multiply by the inverse of whatever proportion of a page it is then multiply by the number of pages and i figure you get within 10% which is close enough
i’ve written millions of words, its like an exclusive club and its interesting to know who else is in it
giacomo casanova’s autobiography
the book comprises 12 volumes and approximately 3,500 pages (1.2 million words) covering casanova’s life from his birth to 1774
i have read most of it, people misunderstand him as a legendary lothario, but he is much more interesting than that