Developer and publisher Eridani Entertainment - in partnership with Lightspeed Studios and Billions Stud Entertainment Network - plans to release a "fun game" and a huge answer to Ubisoft's 2014 game "The Crew", after the live service game was almost erased from the face of The Earth, to be survived by its worse descendant, The Crew 2.
"Blue Marble" is an open world action adventure game set in a stable era sometime in the 2040s. Set on a condensed map of North America (southern Canada and the lower 48), it is a little bit more than The Crew; players can actually step out of their vehicle in third person and interact with their environment.
Blue Marble is basically a lifesim, but comes with a stunning cinematic campaign story.
Lead design director Jack Paris stated, "this is the entertainment industry and consumers want fun and entertainment and for those who are bored with postapocalyptic and medieval genres and don't like being treated as if they're in prison or a third-worlder from a wartorn $$$$hole - excuse my French - or like to feel as if they're playing something made by a British alphabet agency, then Blue Marble is the game for you. If you're sick of the medieval crap or games constantly set in a postapocalyptic America, then Blue Marble is definitely for you."
Players can create their own character or just play as the stock characters - 20something year old dude Thales or dudette Trissy - as they complete the main story campaign.
Thales or Trissy or your custom character has just relocated from a postapocalyptic Great Britain, which has been destroyed and occupied by Russian forces and prepares to start a new, fun and exciting life in North America.
But things don't go according to plan as the protagonist gets caught up with biker gangs, drifters, shady organizations, dangerous racing outfits and dirty cops. So, Blue Marble is certainly more than a racing game, but a sort of "one-stop shop".
Whilst there is no concrete plan for a PC release (which could be in ten years' time or not at all), the game will be released first on PS5 and Xbox and analysts anticipate a sale of more than 300,000 units on console (digital and physical) within the first three months.
CEO of Eridani Entertainment Brogan English added, "this huge game will be released on console first. After ten years, you may see a release on PC, but that's not a concrete plan."
Blue Marble will have both an offline and online mode, with servers of up to 40 players each.
"If you don't want to play something that seems like it was created by an alphabet agency or a group of British spies, then Blue Marble is for you and if you liked The Crew 2014, then you're gonna absolutely love this. If you don't want to be treated as if you're incarcerated or you're a member of a government or an elderly person, then this game is for you. And if you are an entertainment lover and not a Russian robot, then this is a game for you."
Brogan English also added that Blue Marble will show that an open world action adventure game can have a huge map which you can interact with and doesn't have to be small or just a racing game.
"This game will separate the big studios from the small ones and will show that you don't have to be in perennial development to relese something concrete and complete."
English also added that "the map will not be a boring big world and will not have a boring feel like Star Citizen. Blue Marble has a lively and authentic feel and NPCs are active and interactive. It's set in the 2040s and isn't postapocalyptic and devs have worked hard to create a fun and exciting open world, which is why it'll be released on console first because PC players have tended to conclude that games played on PC 'lack a fun and relaxed feel' and that the more intelligent people are perceived to be, the more boring their entertainment becomes. So," English says, "just because players are perceived to possess above-average intelligence doesn't mean their entertainment should become more boring than when they were on console. So Blue Marble is all about having fun, both inside and outside of your vehicles. The map size is roughly a similar size to The Crew 2014, but this is a pure coincidence and Blue Marble's condensed map of North America is more authentic, vibrant, realistic, lively and has more NPCs in it, so it is definitely not an amateur game or game for a smaller community. And don't worry, we steered clear of UE5 because UE5 is an anti-fun, anti-gaming and anti-entertainment engine."
Eridani Entertainment predicts a regular online player base of between 50,000 and 120,000 and a lifetime revenue of between US$170m and US$260m.

"Good-bye, lover-- It's been fun... And I always did want to go in battle. You get to keep your planet, kid... Don't forget me... Don't forget me"
Bio: Val Armorr was the son of Japan's greatest crimelord, Kirau Nezumi, also known as Black Dragon, When he was born, his mother, the American secret agent Valentina Armorr, tried to hide him from his father, but she failed and was killed for her affront. Japan's biggest hero Sensei Toshiaki, the White Crane, eventually killed Black Dragon for his crimes and adopted the infant Val. He raised Val as if he were his own son, and trained him in all manner of the martial arts.
Origin in scan form ^{(Superboy vol 1 #210})
Alternate look at his origin ^{(Secrets of the Legion of Super-Heroes #2})
Databook entries

• Superboy #205
• All-New Collector's Edition #55
• Who's Who: The Definitive Directory of the DC Universe #12
• Who's Who in the Legion of Superheroes #3
• DC Comics Encyclopedia: Updated and Expanded
• All New DC Comics Encyclopedia

Original Val

Strength
Note: Karate Kid needs to concentrate and channel his chi to perform feats of strength ^{(Adventure Comics #359})

• In his origin, chops through a steel beam ^{(Adventure Comics #346})
• Chops through a spaceship hull ^{(Adventure Comics #347})
• Lightning Lad flashes back to Karate Kid stopping a car with a single chop ^{(Adventure Comics #351})
• Knocks out a Jovian Mastodon and a Tricorn Beast with a single strike each, and judo throws a Sloth Ape ^{(Adventure Comics #358})
• Chops through two trees in one swing ^{(Adventure Comics #358})
• Analyzes some thick gates, then chops through them ^{(Adventure Comics #360})
• Kicks away a hover car ^{(Adventure Comics #361})
• Chops through a tank, then starts a small earthquake with a stomp ^{(Adventure Comics #367})
• Destroys a practice bot in a rage ^{(Adventure Comics #373})
• Claims his chops could fell giant redwoods ^{(Superboy vol 1 #203})
• Creates an earthquake with a stomp that breaks apart a statue ^{(Legion of Superheroes vol 3 #31})
  • Note: This is a flashback to earlier times, so despite being in vol 3, takes place Chronologically in vol 1, as shown by him wearing the brown gi instead of his more famous white one
• Punches through a robot ^{(Superboy vol 1 #214})
• Kicks a meteor to pieces ^{(Karate Kid #2})
• Creates a counter-vibration strong enough to reverse Major Disaster's artificial earthquake. ^{(Karate Kid #2}.)
• Flexes off six cavemen ^{(Karate Kid #11})
• [MASSIVE OUTLIER] When bound with ropes made of indestructible Inertron, he somehow manages to break free. ^{(Superboy and the Legion of Super-Heroes #231})
  • Album of Inertron being invulnerable/unbreakable/strong enough to resist Kryptonians
• Breaks out of a machine that saps powers, minds and will (Legion of Super-Heroes vol 3 004)

Speed

• Moves "with the speed of thought" ^{(Adventure Comics #361})
• Dodges Mano and Persuader's attacks ^{(Adventure Comics #378})
• Dodges Validus' mental lightning ^{(Adventure Comics #378})
• Dodges a blast from the Emerald Eye of Ekon ^{(Superboy vol 1 #198})
• Dodges a blast from *sigh* Radiation Roy ^{(Superboy vol 1 #208})
• Rushes forward and front tuck into a Rider Kick in a fraction of a second ^{(Superboy vol 1 #214})
• Dodges a bolt from Lightning Lad ^{(Karate Kid #1})
• Dodges radiation blasts from Nemesis Kid ^{(Karate Kid #1})
• Intercepts a falling meteor ^{(Karate Kid #2})
• Backflips over a bullet ^{(Karate Kid #2})
• Dodges a laser ^{(Karate Kid #13})
• Leaps over a bullet and behind a guy in less than a fifth of a second ^{(Karate Kid #15})
• Dances around Pharoxx's strikes ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes #309})
• Redirects Pharoxx's own magic against him ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes #309})

Durability

• Survives an explosion that KO'd and nearly killed his sensei ^{(Adventure Comics #367})
• Smacked by a giant robot and recovers being back to fighting shape on the next page ^{(Adventure Comics #373})
• Endures ever-increasing pain through meditative techniques even though the pain was so bad, it made Timber Wolf go feral within a few minutes ^{(Superboy vol 1 #209})
• Clears his mind of mental influences ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 2 #268})
• Wades though blasts from Pharoxx ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 2 #288})
• While sick, takes a blast from Pulsar ^{(The Brave and the Bold #198})
• Pulsar explodes right next to him and he's all good. ^{(The Brave and the Bold #198})
• Gets clawed by a monster and shrugs it off ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes #309})
• Gets blasted by Pharoxx's magic and recovers, while Pharoxx getting hit with the same blast made him immediately flee ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes #309})
• [Limit] Dies after being beaten nearly to death by Nemesis Kid, then missile launches himself into a planet-draining machine. ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 3 #4})

Skill
Statements and styles

• Great Skill in all forms of martial arts, but especially Karate and Judo ^{(Adventure Comics #346})
• Master of all forms of fighting ^{(Adventure Comics #359})
• Switches from Boxing to Savate to Kendo against a robot ^{(Adventure Comics #363})
• Knocks some guys out with chops to the back of the neck ^{(Adventure Comics #360})
• Mastered every weapon form "from fencing foils to Jovian trident spears" ^{(Adventure Comics #368})
• Temporarily puts Timber Wolf in a Judo hold ^{(Superboy vol 1 #209})
• Falkone IV arm riflie technique ^{(Karate Kid #12})
• Loback III restraining hold for non-powered people to restrain super-powered people ^{(Karate Kid #12})
• Karate, Judo, "Arcturian Sli-tilla", "Venusian Txrxvrx", and boxing ("the good old one-two punch") in one page ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 2 #268})

Against skilled opponents (Solo)

• Beats a boxing champion ^{(Adventure Comics #377})
• Beats the absolute stuffing out of Black Mace ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 3 #31})
  • Black Mace is stated to be Ganglands's answer to Karate Kid ^{(Adventure Comics #374}) and a fast, strong invincible fighter ^{(Superboy #213})
• Beats Black Mask again, with an assist from Princess Projectra ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 3 #31})
• Quickly beats a dual nunchaku wielding black belt ^{(Karate Kid #3})
• Beats the Samurai known as Master Hand ^{(Karate Kid #4})
• Had the advantage on Black Dragon II, the student of his father he previously beat in Superboy vol 1 #210 ^{(Karate Kid #10})
• Karate Kid vs Black Dragon II in a ceremonial fight. ^{(Karate Kid #10})
• Beats Dick Grayson quickly ^{(Karate Kid #14})
• Wins a tournament and the title of Samurai, going down as the youngest to gain the title ^{(Secret Origins vol 2 #47})

Against Skilled opponents (groups)

• Defeats three Black Belts he claims could waste a battalion of ordinary men ^{(Superboy vol 1 #210})
• Beats six opponents trained by his father, Black Dragon, including the future Black Dragon II ^{(Superboy vol 1 #210})
• Beats a bunch of 20th-century martial arts masters ^{(Karate Kid #1})
• Quickly beats four martial artists ^{(Karate Kid #4})

Against superpowered opponents (1v1)

• Fights Superboy and does so well, Clark says he needs to be in the Legion ^{(Adventure Comics #346})
• Training with Superboy ^{(Adventure Comics #368})
• Gets the advantage over Don Allen, descendent of Barry Allen and a speedster ^{(Adventure Comics #373})
• Defeats Ultra Boy ^{(Adventure Comics #375})
• A brainwashed Karate Kid easily beats Ultra Boy ^{(Superboy vol 1 #205})
• Survives a fight with Superboy, though he constantly mentions he's outmatched and it's taking all of his skill to just survive . ^{(Karate Kid #12})
• Temporarily holds Superboy, but admits he needs help immediately and is losing him and is saved by Mordru's magic wearing off ^{(Superboy and the Legion of Super-Heroes #245})

Against Superpowered opponents (groups)

• Solos the Fatal Five ^{(Adventure Comics #378})
• Manages to hold his own against Lightning Lad, Superboy, Colossal Boy, Saturn Girl, Sun Boy, and Chameleon Boy before being stopped by Cosmic Boy ^{(Karate Kid #13})

Against Skilled Superpowered opponents

• Fights four superpowered assassins and is holding his own ^{(Adventure Comics #361})
• Beats Pharoxx of Orando in a sword fight, forcing Pharoxx to resort to magic ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 2 #286})
• Beats Timber Wolf in a spar ^{(Legion of Superheroes vol 4 #52})

Accuracy

• Splits a rock so each half flies off and KOs a foe ^{(Adventure Comics 361})
• Hits a knight with a stone and KO's him ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 2 #288})
• Uses his sash as a lasso to disarm Pulsar of his power staff ^{(The Brave and the Bold #198})

Agility

• Rushes forward and front tuck into a Rider Kick in a fraction of a second ^{(Superboy vol 1 #214})
• Contorts himself in mid-air to stop himself from falling out of a building then Jumps back in ^{(Karate Kid #1})
• Jumps from the street to a sign to a third story roof ^{(Karate Kid #2})
• Does a series of flips to land safely after jumping out of a building while holding someone ^{(Karate Kid #2})
• Jumps out of a window, does a ton of flips, and starts running on cars ^{(Karate Kid #3})
• Flips on a pole ^{(Karate Kid #11})
• Flips over a car ^{(Karate Kid #11})
• Flips out of Batman's grasp ^{(The Brave and the Bold #198})
• Rolls back to get out of a monster's range, then launches himself into a flying kick ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 2 #309})

Weak Point Sensing

• Finds the weak point in a diamond ^{(Adventure Comics# 365})
• Finds the weak point in a wall ^{(Superboy vol 1 #210})
• Finds Omega's weakest point, but is too weak to capitalize on it ^{(Superboy and the Legion of Super-Heroes #251}). This is the first time it's called an explicit "power" and not a skill.
• Finds the weak point in a hatch ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes #277})
• Originally struggled to find a weak point in massive chains encircling Earth, but after getting a hint from Princess Projectra manages to sense and destroy it ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 2 #279})

Retroboot Val

Despite dying.....Val Armorr's back and in the past! ^{(Justice League of America vol 2 #7}) How? Never explained! ^{(Justice League of America #10}) Here's his feats. Note: All feats are done while he's dying (Countdown Weeks 14-15/ 38-37) from what's later revealed to be the Morticoccus Virus

• While disguised as a supervillain, freezes Parasite without Black Lightning realizing Parasite was the target ^{(Justice League of America vol 2 #2})
• KO's Black Lightning with a chop to the neck and stalemates (and arguably has the advantage over) Batman while sick and memoryless ^{(Justice League of America vol 2 #8})
  • Another view of the fight ^{(Countdown Week 2/#50})
  • Doctor Mid-Nite says Karate Kid very nearly took down Batman in that fight ^{(Countdown Week 7/#45})
  • Batman conceeds Val outfought him but claims he wouldn't in a rematch though he may have been being a jerk to get into Val's head ^{(Countdown Week 10/#42})
• Is still conscious and talking despite being loaded up with enough tranquilizers to give Wonder Woman trouble ^{(Justice League of America vol 2 #8})
• Somehow survives Speed Force Lightning that should have insta-killed him ^{(Justice League of America vol 2 #10})
• Finds the weak point in a vault he's sealed in ^{(Countdown Week 13/#39})
• Tears through Oracle's tendrils and punches through a wall ^{(Countdown Week 13/#39})
• Hurts Equus, an enhanced being who bragged he had fought Superman ^{(Countdown Week 16/#36})
• Kicked Equus arm clean off his body ^{(Countdown Week 17/#35})
• Breaks shotguns and kicks a police car over ^{(Supergirl vol 5 #21})
• [Limit] While he can dodge her attacks, can't move Supergirl with his strikes ^{(Supergirl vol 5 #21})
• Chops Equus arm off ^{(Supergirl vol 5 #22})
• [Limit] The closer to death he gets, the less he's able to focus and use Super-Karate feats ^{(Countdown week 32/#20})
• Takes out four Apokoliptians ^{(Countdown Week 41/#11})
• Takes a hit from an OMAC and shows some agility ^{(Countdown Week 42/#10})
• Dies of the virus ^{(Countdown Week 45/#7})
• Time Trapper puts his and Una's bodies in the mainline Earth when they had died in Earth-51 ^{(Action Comics #864})

Misc

• As a Legionnaire, he has a Legion flight ring ^{(Karate Kid #1})
• Invited his 20th-century friend to his wedding, not realizing she was in love with him ^{(The Brave and the Bold #198})
• Man married a princess. Respect. ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes Vol 2 annual 2})
• Brave enough to try to hit Darkseid with a flying kick, though all it accomplishes is knocking himself out. ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 2 #294})
• It's implied he somehow came back/will come back to life again, but this wasn't elaborated on because of the Flashpoint thanks Barry ^{(Legion of Super-Heroes vol 6 #6})
  • Time Trapper also foreshadowed this ^{(Action Comics 864})

The Scriptures seem to imply that the kingdom of God isn't exactly synonymous with what is called "the Church." The Church was a temporary eschatological community of believers that existed on earth in preparation of a kingdom where God Himself would reign, and said community had Christ reign over them in the meantime. The head of the Church was Christ, with the Father serving as his head (1 Cor. 11:3). The Scriptures teach that, when all Christ's enemies were to be made his footstool, he was to give back all authority to the Father (Psa. 110:1, 1 Cor. 15:22-28), and it is this page's belief that this happened in 70 AD.
The following quotation is from the above hyperlink:

As for the "1000 years" mentioned in Revelation, they are apocalyptic metaphor for the 40 years Christ "reigned" (triumphed) over his enemies both human and spirit, with the final triumph being the judgement of apostate Jerusalem. The "1000 years" began with his ascension, and ended with this judgement.

Thus, the community to replace the Church on earth was to be the kingdom of God. But, what even is the kingdom of God, and why did God have to reclaim authority of His own creation in the first place?
To be as succinct as possible: man sinned, and so the great level of authority God initially granted us ourselves over the creation was stripped. As a result, the human condition has suffered and it must be redeemed for God to allow us to reign with Him in the way that He originally intended for us. God has always been sovereign, of course, but He seeks the good of man to make us stewards over His world with Him, as that was His original plan and this was His original view of what a kingdom of His truly looks like: a kingdom characterized by man's love for Him and love for others.
A Biblical understanding of Adam's sin, contrary to popular thought, isn't that we are guilty of what he did personally. We simply inherit his fallen nature and a fallen world as a result of his sin, the same way a baby could leave the womb already addicted to certain substances because the mother abused said substances while pregnant. It's not the baby's fault for its condition, it was the parent's. But the baby is born with this condition and enters the world like this nonetheless.
The implication of this is that we are all only guilty of our own sins, and whether or not we ever seek to treat (or possibly cure) our condition in the first place is on us. We were dealt a bad hand due to Adam, sure, but God doesn't hold us responsible for what our forefather did. God only holds us responsible for what we do, and whether or not we seek to be liberated from the dark forces which keep us in bondage to our sinful condition (Gen. 4:6-7, Deut. 24:16, Jer. 31:30, Ezek. 18, Matt. 9:9-13).
The whole Old Testament is essentially a record of God's people constantly breaking their covenant(s) with Him. There are individuals mentioned throughout that were, of course, commended by God and the Biblical authors for their righteousness in honestly pursuing to remain faithful to their covenant with Him. But even the best of these people often faltered and, in fact, did rather heinous things in their lives at one point or another. One of the greatest examples of this is king David, who was literally called by the Scriptures "a man after God's own heart" (1 Sam. 13:14, Acts 13:22). Yet, this same man at one point committed adultery and then murdered the man he stole the wife of to try and cover it up. This was a heinous thing, and David repented of what he did with genuine sorrow and guilt toward God. God ultimately forgave him, but not without a heavy hand of chastisement and earthly consequences for his actions.
All throughout the Old Testament, you see various men of God who were deemed righteous, but these same men were usually shown to have some major flaw that prevented them from living a life that could be characterized as consistent obedience to the commandments to love God and love others as themselves. There is something deeply wrong with man's heart, according to the Bible. Something so wrong, in fact, that a whole prophecy had to be given that promised to address the issue of man's seeming incapability to accomplish fulfilling the commandment to love consistently on their own without some sort of divine help from above:

"A new heart also will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you an heart of flesh."-Ezekiel 36:26

Naturalistic philosophies see the physical world as all that exists. Humans beings are the result of mindless, chance causes and processes. Humans are essentially animals – highly evolved, but no different in significance than any other living thing. Thus naturalistic views demote humans. But this view leaves a lot unexplained. Why do humans practice altruism, benevolence, or acts of heroism? And what explains acts of incredible evil? Sure, naturalistic arguments have been made that true altruism doesn't exist, and that "unconditional love" is really just an illusion that's been disguised very well by our survival instincts that we've developed over a long period of time at certain stages of our evolutionary process. However, many people have found such arguments to be unpersuasive and naive when compared to their actual experience of the world as they mature in their lives and have what they know to be truly meaningful experiences that can't simply be reduced in the way that the naturalist wishes them to be. This realization was ultimately why I transitioned from hard atheism to agnostic spiritualism at one point or another.
On the other extreme of these things, transcendental worldviews and philosophies say that the physical world is illusory. Only the spiritual world is ultimately real. Humans are an expression of the divine spirit that is the essence of all things. If naturalistic views demote humans to the level of animals, transcendental views promote human beings. God is not “out there” somewhere; we are God. God is all, thus God is us. But this view doesn’t explain real evil. Why are people selfish? Why do they hurt others? What accounts for personal acts of evil like rape or terrorism? If we are all truly "God," then why would we ever do such things to what is ultimately "ourself"? And why can't a person who practices the belief that we are all actually "God" be only loving? There are so many people who adopt this view of reality who are constantly, day by day, finding that they struggle to be as truly loving as they wish to be because they will still sometimes find themselves thinking and doing rather evil and selfish things. I can speak from experience here, remembering throwing myself into the New Age movement when I was desperately seeking what I did not know at the time was forgiveness for and redemption from my sins because of who I was as a person up until that point. I was seeking the mythic "ego death" that promised me that I could truly be loving and find the forgiveness and redemption I was searching for, because I thought that if only I truly realized I was "God" all along, I could then accomplish these things all at once and simultaneously. I eventually found even this philosophy unsatisfactory when I came to the aforementioned conclusions concerning our great capacity for evil, and also realized that forgiveness can only exist if there are two parties: forgiver and forgivee. Such a thing is impossible if there is only really one being at play at the bottom of reality, and I knew deep down that forgiving oneself (at least, on its own) will never satisfy one's pursuit for redemption that we all inherently take part in whenever pursuing to mend even our own relationships with each other as humans. Further, love would be an illusion in this philosophy too, being that there is only really one party behind and in all of existence if "everything is God." Such an idea would make true altruism a farce, as well. There would be no such thing as real sacrifice for another, because there is no "another."
The French mathematician and Christian philosopher Blaise Pascal said, “Man’s greatness and wretchedness are so evident that the true religion must necessarily teach both.” Any philosophy that cannot fully account for human greatness and human depravity at the same time should be abandoned because it misses something obvious about the human condition. The religion of the Bible has a valid explanation for human greatness: people are made in God’s image. Thus we have dignity, value, and capacity for good. The Bible also explains human evil: the image of God has been defaced by sin. Our great capacity gets used for the wrong purposes. Our creativity is placed in the service of evil and our best intentions twisted for selfish gain. Something has gone terribly wrong. While other worldviews unduly demote or promote humanity, the Bible gets the tension just right.
Thus, human nature is puzzling and conflicting. Other worldviews—both secular and religious—struggle to account for this enigma, and don't offer satisfying solutions to the problem itself. The Bible, however, explains what happened when it tells us that man rebelled against God in the paradise that was prepared for him called "the Garden of Eden." We fell into temptation and estranged ourselves from God by tarnishing the image we were created in, and now are born with a natural proclivity to do evil, despite our best efforts to do good (that is, to do good consistently).
And so, the Bible promised a solution in the prophet Ezekiel that God will literally change our natural human condition, if we simply choose to humble ourselves before Him in faith to allow for such a change. While as unbelievers our inner disposition towards God is often rebellious, we at least still have the capacity to choose to do the righteous thing in seeking God that He may change us and forgive us if we so let Him. This is one reason why Jesus, (the one who made the fulfillment of Ezekiel's prophecy even possible by his coming, sacrifice, ressurection, and outpouring of the Spirit upon his ascension), said that only faith the size of a mustard seed was required for something so miraculous as moving a mountian to happen, because so little is required from us to allow God to change us into the kind of person He's always wanted us to be, and yet changing the condition of our own heart can be compared to literally moving a mountain if we were to try and do so on our own strength alone. The mustard seed was the smallest of seeds, and yet if one simply planted it and nurtured it, it could become a bush so large that it was comparable to a tree with branches that stretched to the heavens for the very birds of the air to rest on.
It was when I came to these realizations that I prayed to God for the first time again, having been years since I did so, going so far back as to when I was a little child even. I prayed in the dead of night in my room, and asked God to show me the truth and to reveal Himself to me if indeed these things were true, and in an instant I felt His very presence in my room, and my heart was changed. To describe such an experience would be like trying to describe the taste of something to the man born without tastebuds, the color of something to the man born blind, or the sound of something to the man born deaf; there are no words, and it is only something you can know by experiencing it for yourself. Suddenly and all at once, I knew right then and there that Jesus really was who he said he was, that the one true God is the God of the Bible, and that I have been forgiven. As the time of this post, it's been 5 years since then, I'm 23 now, and I'm still walking with God.
My prayer for anyone reading this that may not know God for themselves yet is that one day, you will too.
Back to the topic at hand.
When Adam sinned, we fell under the tyranny of death, corruption, evil heavenly powers, and sin itself. When Jesus came, Jesus was the new and exalted human, the new Adam, through whom humanity could now realize their original destiny that was laid out for them in the Garden of Eden. Because Jesus, being a man, obeyed unto death, he has defeated the powers which held us so long under bondage; we are now promised liberation so long as we simply place our faith in his sacrifice to wash us of our sins and receive the Spirit of God that is also promised to all who exercise this faith.
We often think of ‘the gospel’ as the part that brings the forgiveness of sins (and of course, that is part of the idea), but ‘gospel’ is the announcement that everything has changed in the coming of Jesus and it leads us to a new kind of living.
The gospel Jesus preached and the gospel the apostle Paul preached were different, in that Jesus preached of a kingdom where God reigns directly and with all His faithful subjects as participants in that reign. The gospel Paul preached was about the exaltation and reign of Christ, and because Christ reigned, the consummation of the kingdom of God with earth could now finally take place (Col. 1:12-13). This consummation was put on hold during Christ's "millennial" reign, which transpired between his ascension and his return. However, the consummation has come to full fruition since that return.
We will be arguing for some of these claims by pointing out how central the kingdom of God actually was to Jesus' earthly ministry and message, and demonstrate what Jesus taught about how it actually looks like.
The term 'kingdom' appears 53 times in 42 places in Matthew, 17 times in 13 places in Mark, and 41 times in 29 places in Luke. When the 'kingdom' is qualified, Luke always refers to the 'kingdom of God' (32 times) and Mark follows this pattern (14 times). Matthew, on the other hand, prefers the term "kingdom of heaven" (31 times), using the phrase to refer to the same idea "kingdom of God" only four times: 12:28, 19:24, 21:31, 43.
The Gospel of Luke records an event where Jesus responds to the population that lived near Simon Peter's house who believed in him after he had done his miraculous work there, but saw that he was leaving them:

"And when it was day, he departed and went into a desert place: and the people sought him, and came unto him, and stayed him, that he should not depart from them. And he said unto them, I must preach the kingdom of God to other cities also: for therefore [i.e., for this pupose] am I sent." (vss. 42-43)

The Greek word euangelion is often translated as the word “gospel.” In the Bible, this word is always used whenever it concerns the announcement of the reign of a new king. And in the New Testament, the Gospels themselves use this word or the phrase "good news" to summarize all of Jesus’ teachings. They say he went about “preaching the gospel [good news] of the kingdom [of God]” (Matt. 4:23).
There’s this beautiful poem in the Old Testament, and it’s in chapter 52 of the Book of Isaiah. The city of Jerusalem had just been destroyed by Babylon, a great kingdom in the North. Many of the inhabitants of the city have been sent away into exile, but a few remained in the city, and they’re left wondering, "What happened? Has our God abandoned us?" This was because Jerusalem was supposed to be the city where God would reign over the world to bring peace and blessing to everyone.
Now, Isaiah had been saying that Jerusalem’s destruction was a mess of Israel’s own making. They had turned away from their God, become corrupt, and so their city and their temple were destroyed. Everything seemed lost. But the poem goes on. There is a watchman on the city walls, and far out on the hills we see a messenger. He’s running towards the city. He’s running and he’s shouting, “Good news!” And Isaiah says, “How beautiful are the feet of him that bringeth good tidings [news]” (vs. 7a). The feet are beautiful because they’re carrying a beautiful message. And what’s the message? That despite Jerusalem’s destruction, Israel’s God still reigns as king, and that God's presence is going to one day return with His city, take up His throne, and bring peace. And the watchmen sing for joy because of the good news that their God still reigns (vs. 10).
Jesus saw himself as the messenger bringing the news that God reigns. Jesus also claimed to be the Son of man. This was Jesus' favorite self-designation, being used some 80 times in the Gospels. Notice, not just a son of man, but the Son of Man. Jesus was directing our attention to a vision described by the prophet Daniel:

"I saw in the night visions, and, behold, one like the Son of man came with the clouds of heaven, and came to the Ancient of days, and they brought him near before him. And there was given him dominion, and glory, and a kingdom, that all people, nations, and languages, should serve him:"-Daniel 7:13-14a

At Jesus' trial, the Jewish high priest accused Jesus: "Art thou the Messiah, the Son of the Blessed [God]?" His answer left no room for doubt. "I am: and ye shall see the Son of man sitting on the right hand of power, and coming in the clouds of heaven." (Mark 14:61-62). Because Jesus' was rejected and killed for threatening the power the religious authorities had over the people, the consummation of God's kingdom with earth had been put on hold until all of Christ's enemies would be put under his feet after his ressurection and ascension.
But again, what is the kingdom of God? What does it look like exactly?
Well, the way that Jesus described God’s reign surprised everybody. I mean, think about it. A powerful, successful kingdom needs to be strong, able to impose its will, and able to defeat its enemies in physical combat. But Jesus said the greatest person in God’s kingdom was the weakest, the one who loves and who serves the poor (Matt. 23:11-12). He said you live under God’s reign when you respond to evil by loving your enemies, and forgiving them, and seeking peace (Matt. 5). To us, this is an upside-down kingdom. But to God, it's right-side up. This was what God had originally planned for us: a kingdom where God reigns in our hearts.

"Jesus answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God."-John 3:3

Jesus was being quite literal here. You can’t see the kingdom until you’re born again and have the life of that kingdom. When you’re born again, you start 'seeing' differently. You see what others don’t see, you hear what others don’t hear, you know what others don’t know. And yet you may be physically in the same earthly location as they.
The kingdom of God is the totality of God’s influence that covers the world and heaven. It’s everywhere, but its manifestation isn’t everywhere. It manifests on earth wherever there are those who are born again and live as if God reigns in their hearts.
Before Jesus, John the Baptist announced to all people, “The kingdom of heaven is at hand!” (Matt. 3:1-2), as he saw a soon coming kingdom of God that would be ushered in by the Messiah. Notice that John the Baptist didn’t say that something “like” the kingdom would come and he didn’t say that the real kingdom might be thousands of years away. He said over and over that THE kingdom was at hand! Do you believe him? Did God inspire him to give a clear and accurate message or a mistaken one? If we dare to believe him, things might become surprisingly clear, simple and exceedingly optimistic.

"Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven."-Matthew 6:10

Jesus taught his followers of his generation to pray that God's kingdom come and that His will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. Why pray for something that will just inevitably come by force, unless it was actually through our willing participation? That is, unless God's will is carried out through us "in earth, as it is in heaven"?

"Now after that John was put in prison, Jesus came into Galilee, preaching the gospel of the kingdom of God, And saying, The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand: repent ye, and believe the gospel."-Mark 1:14-15

It's very telling that these are the very first words the Gospel of Mark chooses to record Jesus as saying.
The kingdom is NOT something to wait for. Jesus says the kingdom is NOT something visible, and it is NOT something in the sky. The Kingdom Jesus taught is a spiritual reality that comes into the world through us. Considering that Jesus even said the kingdom was in and among the Pharisees in Luke 17, which seems almost offensive to consider, perhaps it is like a spiritual seed that has been planted inside each of us, and that activating faith in God makes it grow.

"Then said he, Unto what is the kingdom of God like? and whereunto shall I resemble it? It is like a grain of mustard seed, which a man took, and cast into his garden; and it grew, and waxed a great tree; and the fowls of the air lodged in the branches of it."-Luke 13:18-19

Jesus talked about the kingdom as if it would be a present reality, yet one that was growing in the world like a seed grows into a tree.

"And again he said, Whereunto shall I liken the kingdom of God? It is like leaven, which a woman took and hid in three measures of meal, till the whole was leavened."-Luke 13:20-21

To Jesus, the kingdom was something growing in us like yeast through dough, increasing in effectiveness.

"For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness, and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost."-Romans 14:17
"For the kingdom of God is not in word, but in power."-1 Corinthians 4:20

Paul says the kingdom isn’t something you taste or touch like physical food. It’s not even saying the right words. But rather the kingdom comes in the realities of righteousness, peace, joy and power that flavor our lives when we live empowered by the Spirit of God and God's Spirit in us.
Since Jesus the Messiah returned only 40 years after his earthly ministry, putting all enemies under his feet, the complete consummation of earth with the kingdom of heaven has finally taken place.
The kingdom of God has come, and it continues to come through us as believers. It makes progress like light shining into the world and dispelling the darkness.

"Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven."-Matthew 5:14-16

Introduction:

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Kadillac Kirk had been a good friend of mine for several years. I had met him through friends from The Spring Stage; and he never had anything to do with The Imp, which is why he didn’t appear in the Married Mary saga. Mary would have totally thrown herself at him, and Kirk would have definitely “thrown it in her.” He loved the ladies and often remarked that there was no such thing as an unappealing woman, nor was there anything sweeter than finding the pearl of passion in an outwardly plain dame. Fortunately for Kirk, he never met Mary. This was probably fortunate for Mary as well, seeing as Kirk was a confirmed bachelor and he would have probably broken her fat heart.
Kirk was an older guy. Not MOE old, though. He was in his early forties, but he easily passed for a carefree dude in his 30s... not that he lied about his age. I only mention this trait to juxtapose Kirk’s genuine youthful air with Moe’s unconvincing youthful farce. Kirk dressed normally, avoided stupid jargon, and never busted out gimmicks like tarot cards or spells. He just existed, behaved affably, and people liked him for it.
He drove a classic 1962 Cadillac El Dorado convertible with red leather interior, and he lived in a charmingly quaint (and ridiculously expensive) neighborhood. How he made his fortune remained a mystery, but he never bloviated about his wealth. He just threw spectacular parties and people showed up. And, to my knowledge, he never tried to lure women into bed with his money (although I’m sure he got his fair share of boom-boom thanks to his digs and his wheels, even if the gold-diggers denied their monetary agendas).
Kirk was legitimately handsome. He was a drummer, he had a full head of black hair, he was clean-shaven, he worked out, and he knew all the hidden gems in Wellsprings. So why hadn’t I tried... or even desired to date him? I don’t know. I just didn’t feel drawn to him like that. He felt like a cool uncle and he had, thus far, never done anything to change my perception. Plus, the age difference weirded me out a little. Kirk didn’t look forty; but knowing that he had so much more life experience than I did created a power imbalance that would have creeped me out if we’d been dating. As buddies, I just felt supremely cool riding in his Cadillac, smoking Fantasia cigarettes, and hitting the speakeasies and jazz clubs I would have never known about if it weren’t for Kirk’s connections.
And he had been a good person to talk to about my romantic woes. He never lecherously suggested that I should date him, and he gave the type of tempered advice that only comes with lived experience. But he often lightly mocked me for my crush on Dennis and he did a hilarious impression of Smegal popping too soon over his “precious.” So when Mary “got me back” by doing whatever she did with to Dennis, I called Kadillac Kirk and told him the drinks were on me if he’d be my designated driver for the night.
Why hadn’t I called Whisky??? Well, A) Kirk was way more fun to hang out with, at least from my past experiences up to that point. And B) I needed to bitch about a boy, something I couldn’t do in good conscience in front of a guy I was dating. So I put on the sexiest plunging halter dress I owned, applied heavy eye makeup and spikey accessories, braved a pair of stilettos, and sashayed out to Kirk’s convertible. I felt like a badass rock star. I probably looked like a try-hard hooker.
Kirk: Daaaaay-um! Somebody really did do a number on you, huh? I know you said you were upset, but the gents are gonna be writing thank you notes to that fat girl and that butt-fucking hobbit.
Me: I just need to feel pretty and numb. And I trust you to keep me from making a fool of myself.
Kirk squeezed my shoulder. “I’ve got you. You do whatever you need to do to get rid of these demons.”
He sparked up a J and offered me the first puff. I gladly accepted. He took one puff of his own, but said that the rest was mine since he didn’t want to drive stoned. See? He was responsible! Weed wasn’t legal in California yet, so I got a little bit baked before I stashed the sativa in the glove box and wrapped a scarf around my hair like a starlet from the Golden Age of Hollywood. Kirk sped out of the parking lot and said he was taking me to a downtown hotel that was hosting a party that night in their lush lobby.
Kadillac Kirk pulled up to the main entrance, paid the valet, and then opened my door. I was wobbly from the weed. And I had stupidly decided to wear heels. You can get high or you can wear high (heels). You can’t have both. Not if you’ve repeatedly injured both ankles (as I have). I had to take Kirk’s arm to keep from keeling over. “Can people tell I’m stoned?” I whispered. Kirk replied, “Nobody’s paying any attention to anyone else’s intoxication. I promise you that much.” I nodded, steadied myself, and strutted alongside my very cool friend, feeling a little more confident.
A live jazz orchestra was playing Cole Porter as we entered the lobby. Everything sparkled. The music was even more intoxicating than the spliff had been. “Just One of Those Things” brought tears to my eyes since the lyrics hit every raw nerve regarding the Dennis debacle. But I smiled. It might sound mental, but being distraught over a trash fire of a one-sided romance was exhilarating. Immature, for sure. But also exhilarating. You see, that kind of sadness doesn’t hurt. Not really. It stings. It leaves little bruises, but it’s very safe to wallow in because you haven’t actually lost anything. Melancholia over that which you never had is as sweet as it is bitter; and that type of twisted splendor is rivaled only by Stendhal.
“Here's hoping we meet now and then. It was great fun, but it was just one of those things.” I sang along with the band, and a fat tear rolled down past my melancholic smile and onto my chin. Kirk brushed it aside. “Too close to home?” I wiped away the remnants of the tear’s journey from eye to chin and smiled a more genuine smile. “The perfect distance from home. Shall we get drinks? Remember, I’m buying.”
Kirk: No, no. This is your time to heal. And I’m here as your pal, not your chauffeur. What would the lady like?”
I pretended to barf. Kirk knew I hated it when he got overly formal and overly attentive. So he did it just to mess with me. “Shot of vodka,” I replied.
Kirk: How many?
I thought briefly. “FIVE.”
Kirk: Five to one, baby. One in five...
Me: No one here gets out alive.
Kirk: Are you able to hold yourself upright, or should you come with?
I took a seat on an ornate, damask-upholstered chaise lounge. “I’ll be okay. And I was kidding about the five shots.”
I sat there lost in the music for a while. I thought very little about Dennis. Even less about Mary. And not at all about Whisky (whom I had shagged less than a week ago). My mind danced through the ornate lighting in the hotel lobby, and I suddenly felt the need to join the hoity-toity guests on the dancefloor!
Kirk returned with four shots of vodka. Two for him, two for me. That was quite reasonable of him. He knew damn well that I couldn’t handle five shots, but he also knew that I was in a... state. One that called for more than a single shot. I raised a both miniature glasses to “No more ninnyhammers or hairy-footed lovers.” Kirk did his hilarious Smegal impression, we double-toasted, and downed the shots. The band launched into “Let’s Misbehave,” and I kicked off my stilettos and made a beeline for the dance floor.
“There’s something wild about you child that’s so contagious. Let’s be outrageous! Let’s misbehave.” Kadillac Kirk swept me up, twirled me around, and dipped me as we both sang along with the lyrics. I wasn’t swooning for him, but I was enthralled by the moment. The music, the dancing, the combination of booze and bud... so I kissed him as he pulled me back to my feet. And he kissed back. In a way that Dennis never had. In a way that Whisky’s beard wouldn’t permit. I didn’t feel the visceral sensations that I’d felt when Dennis had kissed me, but it felt nice to feel desired. And then I noticed that other guests were watching us and applauding. Now, that was a dopamine rush if ever there was one!
I gently broke away from the embrace, high-fived Kirk and returned to the chaise lounge to put my stupid shoes back on. He followed me and smashed his face back onto mine. I pulled away and laughed. “It was a moment,” I told him. “I appreciate the dance, and that kiss was the perfect finale. But it’s not happening again.”
Kirk: Not to worry, Valerie. I know you. I knew all along that we were performing, and I was more than happy to be your scene partner.
Me: And dance partner! Those were some excellent moves! I didn’t know you had ballroom training.
Kirk: You name it, I’ve mastered it. Another drink for the lady?
I pretended to barf again. “Not yet. I’m not sad right now. Do you mind if I just sit here and enjoy the music?”
Kirk: Ah. My kisses do have healing properties...
I flipped my hand up at him. “Knock that shit off, bro. I wanted to hang out with you because I trust you not to get weird. Even if I get weird, I know you have the maturity to balance me out.”
Kirk: Are you calling me old???
Me: No. I’m calling you rational, responsible, and respectful.
Kirk: Well, now. If you can articulate an alliterative statement that fluently, then you clearly aren’t drunk enough!
I dismissed this comment as a joke. And he did indeed knock off the flirtation. We had a perfectly pleasant time chatting and dancing (no more kissing, though). And then I noticed a girl I knew from Into the Woods entering the lobby. She’d played Florinda and I’d played Little Red. I called her name and waved enthusiastically. She waved back. And then her date entered. It was D.E.N.N.I.S. I sank into the chaise. Kirk caught on immediately. “The hobbit???” he asked. I nodded silently. “You wanna make out again?” he enthused. I shook my head. I had to go say hello to Flo. And I had an idea...
I crossed the lobby, smiled, squealed, and hugged her.
Florinda: Lil’ Red! It’s been forever! So glad to see you!!! This is my friend, Denny.
Dennis was shifting uncomfortably. I extended my hand. “Nice to meet you. I know your date from Into the Woods. I bet she could tell you some entertaining stories about that show...” Flo laughed out loud, well aware of the many misadventures to which I'd referred. Of course, she might have been laughing because Dennis never, ever listened to anyone else's stories. He was too busy telling, re-telling, slightly altering, and exaggerating his own.
Dennis: C’mon, Val...
Me: Oh, you’ve heard of me? Small world! You guys picked a great night to come here. They’re playing Cole Porter, and the band is delovely!
Florinda (appearing oblivious to the iciness between me and Dennis): Have you seen Prince Big Bad (Scumbanger) lately?
I laughed. “Last time I saw him, he was hitting on some nasty fat chick at The Imp.”
Flo and I both scoffed at the pervy pest. Into the Woods was where I’d initially met Scumbanger. He played The Wolf/Cinderella’s Prince. Again... typecasting. There’s a whole essay in my brain about my first encounter with the pest, during which he quoted the song that he sang to me in the show, “Hello, Little Girl.” But it gets into some pretty uncomfortable territory because he made me feel excited. Well, excited and scared. Nothing of note happened during Into the Woods, but our odd interactions did kind of set the stage for some extremely regrettable events during that Cats cast party.
I excused myself, saying that I needed to get back to my friend. And then I leaned in and said in a hushed voice to Flo, “Watch your ass with that one. If he’s the Denny I’m thinking of...” I gave her a look that only another female would be able to read. Her eyebrows shot up and she nodded. Dennis continued to shift as though he were trying to hold in a massive dump. “BABE! Uh...”
Flo apparently answered to that moniker as well. “What is it, Denny? Don’t worry. That was just telepathic girl talk. You apparently have a reputation...”
Dennis: Different Denny. I assure you I’m a pious gentleman.
Me: Ah. My mistake. Well, then. You guys have a good time! Nice to meet you, Denny. Great to see you, Flo!
I hugged Flo again, gave Dennis a curt nod, ignored the scent of mandarins and mountain air, and returned to Kirk.
I collapsed on the chaise lounge, exhausted from holding back the rage. I had no right to be mad at Florinda. I hadn’t seen her in three years, so how was she supposed to know that I’d had a thing with Dennis? Hell, I couldn’t even be mad at Dennis because the last time he and I had spoken in any meaningful way, I’d told him that I was no longer entertaining my crush on him. So why was I surprised to see him dating??? And why had he never taken ME out on a date like this??? And why wasn’t I smitten with Kadillac Kirk who HAD taken me out on a date like this, was an objectively excellent kisser, and a bona fide BALLER? What was wrong with me???
Kirk suggested going down the street to a quaint little bar and then sobering up at a diner closer to my apartment. I numbly nodded and followed him in silence for a few blocks. He assured me that I had “turned several heads” on the way to the new location, but I neither cared nor believed him. This wasn't the type of numbness I'd been aiming for. Now I needed to get schnockered. “Five shots of vodka, please.” Yes, I was serious.
Kadillac Kirk, my reliable designated driver, ordered only a beer and watched in something across between astonishment, concern, and delight as I slammed all five shots in rapid succession. I half expected to immediately retch all over the bar. But I felt fine. I half expected to immediately lose consciousness and wake up in the hospital. But I remained coherent. How I’d managed to take in that much hard liquor and suffer no direct consequences, I’ll never know.
I think I wanted to suffer. I wanted to either feel nothing at all or to feel a sickness bad enough to distract me from the scorching sting that pulsed through my being when I realized that I had lost the abstract notion I’d been addicted to this entire time. Hope. It wasn’t Dennis himself I couldn’t quit. It was that drug called hope. The hope that maybe, just maybe Dennis would give our romance a fair chance. The hope that maybe, just maybe he would make peace with himself, get his mind out of his crotch, and enjoy some agenda-free togetherness. The hope that maybe, just maybe he would stop bloviating about his admittedly impressive accomplishments for five fucking minutes and ask about my life. I had my own reasonably impressive accomplishments, even if they paled in comparison to his. A proper suitor would have enjoyed hearing about them.
But seeing him out with another woman, a woman who had no reason to parade her Dennis escapades before me as some means of revenge, a woman he was clearly courting of his own volition... My hope had died. It died before I’d had time to wean myself off it. Now I had to mourn the loss of hope, which is a very tricky brand of grief to navigate. Vodka wasn’t the answer, but it was what I had to work with. So it would have to do.
After enough time had passed without vomiting or collapsing, I asked Kirk to bring his car around to the bar so that I didn’t have to walk two and a half blocks drunk and in heels. He nodded and dramatically leaned in for a kiss. I recoiled. “DUDE! I told you. The moment has passed.”
Kirk: I beg your pardon. I misread your eyes. Thought I saw a green light...
Me: It’s fine. I just want to go home while I’m still feeling okay.
Kirk: Of course. Your chariot will be here soon.
He skipped off to fetch his Cadillac and I noticed that the lights in the bar were beginning to dance a bit. This should have been concerning. But then I realized that I was giggling. Wait... What? Oh shit. Sure, I was drunk from those shots. But what I was feeling in that moment wasn’t drunkery. It was stonery. Kirk probably misread my face because my pupils were dilated. Not from desire, but from drug use.
Some of you might be thinking that I was a bad friend for not introducing Lucy, an old dude connoisseur, to Kirk. Well... I did. Several years before the events of this story. He adored her. She, on the other hand, thought he was immature. And she wasn’t wrong. Lucy was astute when it came to sussing out a person’s true nature. Far more astute than I. Her initial assessment that Kirk was immature is about to be vindicated. Stretch those cringe muscles! It’s almost time for pie...
I somehow managed to get to his car. I honestly don’t recall how I got there. Did one of the bartenders carry me? Did some kind patron allow me to lean on him? Had Kadillac Kirk carried me out? I’m not sure. But my memory ceases to be fuzzy about halfway to the 24-hour diner. It might have been the very same 24-hour diner where Mary pulled her... shenanigans. I’ll never know.
Kirk: Would you say that you’re more drunk or more stoned?
Me: STONED. Definitely stoned.
Kirk made some sort of grunty noise and reached for my thigh. I slapped his hand.
Kirk: Stoned but not amorous? That’s rare.
I started laughing rather unkindly. “You’re a fucking horndog! I thought you were my safe straight male friend, dammit.”
Kirk: I solemnly swear that your safety is my primary concern, my stoned beauty.
I pretended to throw up.
Kirk: So... You’re not horny. But are you hungry? The diner I’m heading to makes this Maple Walnut Pie with the most sumptuous... sensual cream and exquisite drizzling of...
Me: Ew! Stop trying to bang the pie. Bro. Are YOU stoned? (Then I remembered the question.) Yes, I’m hungry. But I don’t like nuts. I’ll have banana cream.
Kirk made that repulsive grunty noise again. “Uhhhhh... Mmmmmm. Cream. Yessssss. Yes, we’ll be there in just a minute.” He was squirming in the driver's seat.
Me: GROSS, DUDE! If you’re gonna be like that I’ll just order HASH brows. Get it? Hash??? (I giggled uncontrollably.). You can’t make that sound nasty.
Kirk: Forgive my jokes. I think my blood sugar’s a bit low.
As Kirk parked, I began to wonder how I might get away with walking shoeless into the diner. The stilettos had to get off my feet. At least while I was walking. And Kirk was kind enough to give me his socks and wear his loafers “island style” into the establishment. Okay, that was gallant of him. Maybe he was going to behave himself for the rest of the evening.
I wasn’t terribly talkative as we sat down, and he expressed concern for my emotional well-being. I wasn’t coherent enough to explain what was happening to my emotions and I wasn’t sure I trusted him with my deep, dark secrets at that point. So I shrugged like a sulky teenager, ran my hands over my messy, windblown hair, and mumbled that I was “just hungry.” And right on cue, a very kind, slightly older waitress with a sweet southern accent stopped by to take our order.
Kirk: Ah, yes. We’ll have two cups of black coffee. And we’ll share a slice of that delectable Maple Walnut Pie.
Waitress: Oh, honey. That pie is scrumptious! I take it you’ve been here before?
Kirk: I have. This will be her first time to taste the splendor.
I hated to be a killjoy, but I interrupted and said to the waitress, “Ma’am? I’m sure the Maple Walnut is excellent, but could I please get a slice of Banana Cream? And a big glass of ice water?
Waitress: Sure, hon! Banana Cream’s just as yummy! I’ll be right back with those coffees and that big water.
Kirk was sucking on the tip of his forefinger and shaking his head a bit. “You’re passing up so many sensational... sensual...”
I put my forehead on the table and growled. “You swore you’d stop being nasty!” I held this #headdesk pose for quite some time before I finally lifted my head... only to see that Kirk was still sucking his fingertip and staring at me like a wild animal. “Pleeeeeease be normal,” I whined. “It’s been a really weird night for me.”
Kirk: Indeed. Many surprises. You know... You’re like titanium. Your flame burns so fast and so bright, if a guy doesn’t get in there while the iron is hot, he’ll never get another chance. I was too slow.
What the...? I was pretty sure he was wrong about titanium burning quickly. I’m no chemistry wiz, but my dad and my oldest brother are both big-brains when it comes to physics and chemistry. So I picked up some things just listening to them talk. Accurate or inaccurate, Kirk was being creepy again. He’d never been creepy towards me before, although I’d seen him act like this with other women. Usually with staggering success. Why????? His money. It had to be his money. Kirk was a nice-looking man, but holy shit... No amount of good looks could save this creep show.
And then, our sweet waitress sat down our coffees, my water, and the two slices of pie. After I gulped down a whole bunch of water, I grabbed a fork, prepared to quell my munchies... and then I froze. Kirk was quickly flicking his finger back and forth across the top of his pie. And moaning. He noticed my wide-eyed stare, smirked, sucked the tip of his thumb, picked up the plate with both hands, and began flicking his tongue across the tip of the triangular pie slice. And moaning some more. Well, there went my appetite.
Kirk took his middle finger and jabbed it into the crustless vertex of the pie slice, then he began pumping it in and out like a piston, and flicking his thumb across the increasingly demolished top layer of whipped cream. He gasped this time. People were starting to stare. His pointer finger joined his middle finger in the piston action, and he replaced his thumb with his tongue. Between flicks of the tongue, he groaned, “Oh yeah, baby... Let me taste you,” but it was kind of hard to understand him.
And I was either about to run to the back office, tell them that I was in danger and needed a police escort home... OR I was about to burst out laughing at the spectacle. Kirk continued... He removed his fingers and gregariously licked pie filling off of them. And then he started sucking his fingertips again, switching from middle to pointer, middle to pointer and emitting a delighted little, “Mmmmmm” with every suck.
Finally, he jabbed his fingers back into the utterly destroyed pie, lowered his face into the mess and lapped loudly and passionately, moaning, grunting, and mumbling “Come on, baby. Come on. Mmmmmm. Come on.” I could see the waitress and some dude in a suit heading over to the table, so I sank down in my seat, partially covered my face, but continued to watch the train wreck. At last, Kirk shuddered violently, he splatted his entire hand onto the plate and rubbed furiously. And then he locked eyes with me. He sucked the tip of his thumb one final time and said, “You...” There was a long pause during which Kirk lovingly stroked the mess he’d made. “You... are the pie.”
I don’t hang out with Kadillac Kirk anymore. But he’s still a bachelor, ladies!

I completed my build with the H6 Flow case. I went with 3x120mm QX + 3x120mm QX + 2x140mm QX corsair fans.
I ran into issues with the bottom fans and went flipping the bottom fans to exit air. That meant I had to reverse the top fans on the Kraken AIO as well.
CPU started to hit 75°C to 80°C as the liquid temps would stay above 55°C.
So, a friend who helped me with the build shared this post: My H6 Flow build ft. Corsair QX cooling. I went ahead and unlinked the 2x140mm fans at bottom and rotated them and used a cutter blade to shave off some plastic from the connecting 90-degree cable as well as to further flush in the fans.
The issue I have now is that I was using just one Corsair hub that allows for 2 device connections. That hub was handling the 6 fans (3 x Front + 3 x Top Radiator) linked + 2 x 140 linked. Now, it's handling the same (top + front) 6 fans + just one of the 140 mm bottom fans due to only two connection points.
I was able to add a second Corsair hub, power it, and connect the single 140mm. But I have no USB2 header left over on the motherboard: ASRock Z790 Steel Legend WiFi; as one USB2 header is occupied by the first Corsair hub and the other USB2 header is occupied by Kraken.
Added the second hub without a USB connection
Single 140mm Fan on second Hub
Made the 2 x 140mm as flush as possible while still avoiding cable damage
I was also planning to get a strix for the ugly 24-pin connector as well... The motherboard choice is also a limiting factor here.
Do I have option(s) to expand on the USB2 Headers?
Here is my build for reference:
PCPartPicker Part List

Type	Item
CPU	*Intel Core i7-14700K 3.4 GHz 20-Core Processor
CPU Cooler	NZXT Kraken 360 78.02 CFM Liquid CPU Cooler
Thermal Compound	Thermal Grizzly Kryonaut 1 g Thermal Paste
Motherboard	ASRock Z790 Steel Legend WiFi ATX LGA1700 Motherboard
Memory	Corsair Vengeance RGB 64 GB (2 x 32 GB) DDR5-6400 CL32 Memory
Storage	Lexar NM790 4 TB M.2-2280 PCIe 4.0 X4 NVME Solid State Drive
Video Card	Gigabyte WINDFORCE V2 GeForce RTX 4080 SUPER 16 GB Video Card
Case	NZXT H6 Flow ATX Mid Tower Case
Power Supply	Gigabyte UD1000GM PG5 (rev. 2.0) 1000 W 80+ Gold Certified Fully Modular ATX Power Supply
Operating System	Microsoft Windows 11 Pro OEM - DVD 64-bit
Case Fan	Corsair iCUE LINK QX120 RGB Starter Kit 63.1 CFM 120 mm Fans 3-Pack
Case Fan	Corsair iCUE LINK QX120 RGB Starter Kit 63.1 CFM 120 mm Fans 3-Pack
Case Fan	Corsair iCUE LINK QX140 RGB Starter Kit 82.5 CFM 140 mm Fans 2-Pack
Keyboard	Logitech G910 Orion Spectrum RGB Wired Gaming Keyboard
Mouse	Logitech G502 Proteus Core Wired Optical Mouse
Headphones	Logitech G935 7.1 Channel Headset
Webcam	Logitech C920 HD Pro Webcam
Custom	Kogan 34" IPS Ultrawide USB-C FreeSync HDR Gaming Monitor KAMN34XQUCLA
Custom	Kogan 34" ​IPS Ultraw​ide USB-C ​FreeSync H​DR Gaming ​Monitor KA​MN34XQUCLA

Marked series Spoilers just in case some one really cares about little details about the Cohort and the fact Gideon's Sword is in places for plot reasons.
Ok, so this may seem like a nitpick, because it is, but how Gideon smuggles her sword to Canaan House has always bothered me. I understand why that sword needed to be in Canaan for everything that happens to happen, but the method just seemed... Unrealistic.
As anyone who has engaged with TLT knows Gideon prefers to wield her two hander, as the books call it. Muir later clarified that it was meant as a German Zweihander (literally just translates to two hander). My problem is how the hell is Gideon's luggage big enough to conceal the blade.
The first major problem is that the classification of swords is a mess and most terms we have to day for historical blades really just translates to "sword". As well how most people think of swords is just off. So when refering to Gideon's Sword as a two hander or really a Zweihander gives us little to no information on how big exactly Gideon's luggage must be since Two handed swords can reach anywhere from 100cm (3ft 2in) to well over 183cm or 6ft in length and still be viable for combat. This variation is mostly due to the fact that swords were so important and expensive that they were made to fit the user and their style of combat. A sword closer to 100cm would be made with point control in mind and for one on one combat where as blades that are commonly thought of as Zweihanders are ment for larger people who are focused on multiple enemies as the sword works more like a flail or a spear when it comes to need for velocity and ability to keep space respectfully. This considered, we do not need to acertain Gideon's hight as the sword is Cohort standard issue, meaning that if it is available in more than one size, it is extremely limited in variation as we see the disposable nature of Cohort cavaliers. This means on the battlefield another soldier would need to be able to pick up and use the blade if trained. However, I would believe that there would be several options of blades and that a Zweihander would simply be for those few Corn fed troops that can handle the weight. All this to say my secondary question isn't how big is a sword Gideon should be wielding but instead how big is a Cohort standard issue Zweihander?
Most Zweihanders are at least 1.4 meters or 4 ft 7in from point to pommel. However, there have been Zweihanders made up to 7 feet or 2.1 meters long that weight in at 6.8 Kg or 15 lbs. The biggest sword ment for battle, and not ceremonial use, could not way more than 8.8 lbs. or about 4 Kg due to the energy consumption to effectively use such a heavy sword. One heavy example of a useable Zweihander is 3.6Kg (7.9lbs) in weight and 197cm (6ft 5in) length. This however would not be viable as a standard issue weapon since this blade would be on the larger side and not exactly fit for one size fits all. A more resonable length would be around the minimum length of 1.4 meters however this works out to be around the maximum of a longsword and i don't believe Muir would have specified a Zweihander if a particularly big longsword was intended. Therefor, I will go with the length of about 170 cm or 5ft 7in as that is about the average hight of a man world wide. This is because most Greatswords, and there for Zweihanders as we call them today, should be about the hight of the wielder.
So, now that we have the length of the sword it is time for the luggage. The sword was smuggled using a false bottom, this means to find the minimum length of the box we'd need to operate in two dimension rather than three. I.e. the sword needs to lay flat on the bottom. To do this I will use the Pythagorean theorem (C=√A²+B²) but to find leg A rather than the hypotenuse. This will give us the dimensions of the box only issue is to find leg B first.
Ok, here's the thing I have zero clue what kind of luggage they have in the Houses. I'm assuming some kind of futuristic container pod or maybe like a chest or a trunk since, y'know, Ninth House. It is for sure not modern luggage as that size would be ridiculous and I do not think it would be any kind of big storage container as it must reasonably fit in their room. The final requirement is that it must also contain the necessary items that belong to Gideon, it is not much but I can imagine the there would still be a good amount of personal effects as to warrant a large box to hide the sword. Amazon boxes that seem big enough for all criteria are about 50cm (20in) in depth and so we will use that as our leg B.
Finally, it is box time. Using the modified Pythagorean theorem that is used to find the length of leg A (A=√C²-B²) we get (A=√170²-50²) for a total of 162.48cm (5ft 3in). This is not as absurd of a number as I thought but I do think it is a bit ridiculous size for an individual piece of luggage. Mind you, this is double the length of an average foot locker. For Gideon to get away with sneaking this sword to Canaan House it would just be a normal piece of luggage and while I understand that they do not know how long they we be there, cannot imagine Gideon needs 40 gallons (150L) of storage space as I cannot imagine Gideon would be allowed to fill the damn thing with dirty mags.
TLDR: While not absurd, Gideon was given a Harrow sized box and nobody thought it weird.
P.S. This was not a Lack of Alecto™ fugue state. I just finally had time to answer this weird little gripe I've had this whole time.

Hi all,
I'm in the process of trying to get on top of my long term investments and was hoping to sense check a decision please. I'm 40, and my current work pension pot is £95k. I pay in 8% and my employer tops it up with 10% on top. Until now I haven't given it much thought so I've been on the default fund which is with Aviva 'Av MyM My Future Focus Growth S4' and it has a risk level of 4, with 60% in equities.
In addition to my pension I've just set up a stocks & shares ISA and have a small amount in the VWRP fund, and I will be adding money to this every month. I wanted to invest in a global, passive fund that I can set and forget and after doing a lot of research this seemed like a decent option. I also liked the idea of the flexibility I have from having the S&S ISA in addition to my work pension, rather than putting more money into my work pension, and the research I did seemed to suggest that as a good option (once maxed out employer contribution in work pension then set up an S&S ISA next).
From my research it seems I've made a mistake leaving my pension in the default lifestyle fund which auto changes as you age, so I'm thinking of changing it. The risk level is 4 at the moment – I'm happy to have more risk and volatility, and I'm 40 so still have 20+ years before retirement. As with my ISA, I want something simple that doesn't need too much management. I was thinking that due to the above I should look at changing my pension to a 100% equities fund, something globally diverse like the HSBC FTSE All World Index C Acc. And then just keep paying into that fund, and as I approach retirement then start thinking about de-risking with bonds.
I know it's a personal decision, but I just wanted to sense check the above please as I'm still learning a lot about investing/pensions etc. Is changing my current pension pot of £94k from the 'Av MyM My Future Focus Growth S4' fund to something like the 100% equities 'HSBC FTSE All World Index C Acc' a sensible move? Or should there be concerns with that? I know it would be more volatile so could see a big drop in my fund, and I know nobody can time the market but seeing news stories online that market at all time high and could be crash/correction coming etc then would doing something like this right now not be ideal timing?
Also if I I went ahead I would have both my pension and my S&S ISA in passive, global 100% equities funds. As they have the same objective of investing for the long term I don't think this is a bad thing? I watched a Pension Craft video and he mentioned having your ISA and Pension in same fund is fine if for the same goal.
Any other thoughts welcome please!
Many thanks!

As I was watching the Costco episode with Mitch and cam it made me think about to the first time when I went to ikea and I was shocked to see you could buy not only furniture but food and the fact that this place was HUGE! I would have loved to see an episode of Mitch and Cam in ikea and it’s an episode about them getting lost and somehow getting separated and they end up going on spiritual home through the mazes of ikea

So I’ve made a separate acct to post this bc I’m worried abt the consequences if anyone ik somehow found out abt this.(21NB) grew up in a toxic household, I’m audhd, I’m pretty sure my step dad is as well bc he’s heavily dyslexic and adhd but I’m also pretty sure he’s a narcissist, my mother is also most likely autistic for various reasons but more importantly I believe she’s a narc by proxy.
I was horrible with school, infact I ended up dropping out. I always finished a school year with at least 2 failing classes, and was a straight c student (when I wasn’t failing). Throughout my life I was gaslit and manipulated consistently into thinking I wasn’t trying hard enough and they were “convinced” I was lazy, entitled, and overall selfish, I was even called a “little narcissist” a couple times, even tho my whole life they implied it. Any time I’d give a reason relating to my autism as to why I wasn’t “pulling my weight” it’d by labeled as an excuse every single time without fail, this would frequently lead to us fighting and meltdowns on both of our parts bc of my stimulation issues and the fact they’re yellers. I was never able to get my struggles heard anywhere near how much I needed if at all bc they’d either use my social difficulties against me mid “debate” or “argument”; any time I took to long to respond I was thinking of a lie, if I had to look up to stim I was rolling my eyes, if I wasn’t making eye contact enough or accidentally “embarrassed” them somehow I wasn’t trying hard enough to socialize, etc etc.
All the accumulated manipulation, betrayal, and overall abuse led to, ocd, ocpd, osdd 2, and cptsd. I can’t even hear or read the word “narcissist” bc it’s heavily triggering, I have an obsessive hatred for anything that could be conceived as selfish, social skills got worse, etc. in 2021 I met a guy and we started dating, low and behold, he ended up being a narcissist too, how do I know this? Well, I moved out with this man a little over a year later not really noticing any truly alarming and it stayed like that until I told him whilst I was a work that I wanted to kms (still do lol), he then texted my mother and I had a talk with her about it after work. When I got home, I immediately noticed he looked upset and annoyed. I looked at him said “what” and fell face first on to my bed. Silence… he then asks “did you say that bc of me?”. I then said “what” again In which case he dismissed it said “nvm” and if I remember correctly he MIGHT have apologized I don’t necessarily remember, but he didn’t show much remorse at all after. This was all fall of 2022.
Fast forward January 2023 he “breaks up with me” for the first time, I then beg, and he accepts the beg, this was bc he “didn’t know if he could do it” (he found me embarrassing around his friends and I have trouble keeping up around the house but its NEVER a pigsty). He does this a few more times over the span of a few months and eventually it actually happens and I’m convinced it’s all me fault, I was a big and glorious break up with a couple days full of screaming crying and negotiating for the next attempt, that never came to be. A couple weeks after the breakup I find out about npd for the first time, this was the same day my ocd skyrocketed until further notice (notice still hasn’t been given) and I found out right then and there my ex, and my parents were like this.
While we were together we signed a lease on the house him, I, and 2 of his friends live today. And a few months into us living here he ends up having a full blown psychosis, that consisted of a week straight of him yelling “don’t worry you’re just like Steve Jobs” “its ok you’re just like Steve Jobs” for like 5 minutes at least every hour, barely feeding his cats, forcing his friends to re-write a Taylor swift song to fit him and his new bf, singing said Taylor swift song at the top of his lungs every chance he got, talking very loud, etc (also he got a 2nd cat that he couldn’t either financially or mentally take care of close to a month b4 this incident). A couple months later his brother dies and he goes to Louisiana for the wake and funeral (LLKCW🙏) and I haven’t seen him since a couple weeks after the psychosis incident (3 months).
So now here I am living in the house where I was promised a happy life, my roommates don’t give a fuck about anything that happened between us, I don’t wanna live with them in a couple months, I don’t wanna move back in with my parents, I don’t have a job, any money, serotonin, I cant b homeless (obviously), I’m worried about my mom, I’m worried my step dad is gonna snap one day bc I’m not there for him to take out his little antisocial tendencies and idk if my mother would allow him too take them out on her however my step dad is built like a wall and they own guns, I want my parents to fully realize the sheer damage they caused me but I don’t wanna see the looks on their faces, I’m scared they’ll hurt themselves or other people or each other, and I wanna leave this big fat fucking lie of a life I was promised behind and never look back.
W T F DO I DO

I woke up to seagulls this morning, I really like the sound of them. I mean they don’t make pretty sounds, nor is it relaxing, but it feels like a comforting noise I guess? I think because I like being by the sea. I’m not sure. It was nice though. I love living by the sea, like I hear ship horns and seagulls and all of that. It makes me forever paranoid of tsunamis though. I think I’d like to live in a little seaside town with my honey, but I also don’t because then I couldn’t have the garden of my dreams nor would I have the countryside lifestyle I want. I don’t really know what I want. I don’t think I have enough money to be all that picky anyway.
I kind of woke up with that pit in my stomach feeling today. I don’t like how our calls were last night, either one of them. The first I felt like he didn’t want to talk to me and the second it was me being like that to him. I didn’t mean to make it come across that way, but I think he just caught me out when I was mid-deep sleep? I couldn’t wake up or focus and idk. Normally I’m fine to wake up though? And I love his night time calls, to know he’s thinking about me makes me feel so warm inside. It feels weird to think I ever cross his mind when we aren’t in an active conversation, I guess that comes back to the self esteem thing and feeling unworthy of being a thought in his mind, not feeling important enough, or something. But in that second call, I guess I didn’t like that he got me off the phone earlier because he was so sleepy, but then it turned out he was still up and about two hours later? It made me feel like he lied about being tired to get rid of me. I don’t think that was the case, but it’s how it made me feel in the moment. Anyway I woke up feeling uneasy, I felt okay but a little uneasy so I made sure to apologise. I think as well because I fell asleep feeling a little uneasy, it felt like he rushed me off the phone or like I was boring him to death or something. But it made me think about how it’s only 9pm where he is, and that he could quite easily have someone come over around that time. I don’t believe he would do that, but it scares me all the same. The way in which he could crush me into nothing is a little frightening sometimes, it really feels like I’ve just laid out my sad little heart out there for him to stomp all over if he so wishes to do so. I know if he did end things I would be okay, I think, but I can’t say I don’t worry about how it would affect my mental health and “recovery” - how far would it set me back? But also that’s not on him at all, and I’m never ever going to imply as such to him. He ought to make decisions based on what he wants and is best for him. Anyway it’s fine and we talked this morning and nothing has changed for him either, we both still want each other and this so it doesn’t even matter. I still feel bad about how I made him feel. I’m really glad, even though I made him feel bad which I wish I hadn’t, but sometimes it really helps to have him say he still wants this. I know his actions speak louder than words, but sometimes I need the words too. And so him saying “I’m still the same” was really reassuring and made me feel so lovey.
I’ve made a hair appointment, for end of June. I kind of wanted it early June as my hair is annoying the f out of me now, but her first available slot is end of June sooo I guess it still works out well. It gives me five weeks to continue growing out my layers so that we can start afresh. I’m going to get my face framies cut shorter this time as they grow out so quickly. I think otherwise I’ll get very subtle layering, enough to add some movement and help it air dry nicely, but I want the ends as thick as possible too. I’ll get a general root touch up to darken them up a little, and then a tonegloss for the lengths to cool down the warmth a little and darken it up ever so slightly. And then I’ve booked in for a full on olaplex treatment, so that will be nice. I am all about my hair health this year. I always have been but now even more so.
It’s so autumnal today. I really want to watch my favourite cosy romcoms, their autumn scenes are always my most absolute favourite. And winter I suppose. Basically Meg Ryan in autumn is my favourite thing and comforts me to no end.
I think I assume that if I know something then everyone else must know it too, so when they don’t I find it baffling that they don’t know. I guess because I consider myself thicker than a brick and everyone else smarter than I am, so I’d say in the team quiz no one knows the answer I start thinking how do you not know this, but that’s unfair of me and I’m making an assumption based on my low self esteem. But also I am as dumb as a rock so I mean there’s low self esteem and then there’s self awareness. But I just assume that if I know something, then it therefore must be as widely known as 2+2=4.
I’m wearing my Mon Guerlain perfume today, I quite like it, I guess I liked it a fair but considering I seem to have both a bottle of the edp and edt? I think this was during lockdown. Anyway I never wear it but I am today as it’s quite a warm scent, it’s like a warm vanilla but with a touch of lavender? Barely any lavender though, just a teeny tiny little bit. I just googled and that’s exactly what it is so yay me! Except it’s blatantly obvious so perhaps I’ll calm down on the self celebrations. Anyway it’s not one I’d replace but I do like it I suppose. It feels a little mature, not in an older woman way but in a mid-40s way. I read a comment and it said that it gives wife-and-adoring-mother with a wealthy husband, who’s just kissed her children goodnight before sweeping off in her furs to dinner and the opera. It’s classy and elegant, but with something warm and motherly to it and I get that too. Like the mama in Peter Pan! Anyway I’m a little ways off that stage of my life. But it’s a nice wfh scent I suppose. Most of my perfumes are just wfh/chill at home ones now. I wear perfume everyday, I’d say that’s silly but a) Andy tends to too and anything he does that I do makes me feel more assured it’s okay, b) I have a lottttt to get through and c) even if I didn’t have a lottttt to get through I still would because I just like to feel pretty. I may be as ugly as a troll but I will still be presentable enough. Not nicely, but perfume, groomed brows, glowy skin/skincare, my cutie lil diamond studs, brushed hair etc. Except I like a lived in look, I don’t like to look super prim and proper I prefer more bedheady hair and to look like I don’t care an awful lot, but in a nonchalant Kate Moss way not a get wrecked Adam Sandler way. Except I think Adam Sandler is the better of the two - I read he still has a regular-ish house? Then again it was the internet and I’m as gullible as… idk something gullible. That’s what I adore about Andy, he will do his own research and not believe anything outright, he’ll question it and all of that. Whereas I can just be like woowwwww crazy and then move on. There are many ways I’d like to be more like him, I don’t want to be like him but I just want to be better and he’s better so idk. He seems a little paranoid I’ll be like his ex who basically tried to become the tweedle dum to his tweedle dee, but I mean that’s never going to happen? I like to try things he likes, for example snacks and drinks and things. And if he says he enjoys using something and recommends it, ie his mouse, then I take his recommendations seriously. But I’m never going to dress or act like him, I mean I adore him but I don’t want to be a man…? I like being girly and different from him! But I just mean I like how he approaches things, I like how he handles disagreements or thinks about new information - they’re things I want to kind of learn from him. Not in a way where I’d ask because that makes it weirder. Idk. This whole thing is weird. I just admire him. Now I sound like some kinda single white female… which I am… oh god.
Todays been fine overall. I did something new workwise, getting into LOEs for H&S speeding stuff, I had a call with a manager about one of his direct reports this morning and he was like I mean is it that bad and I had to tell a 40 something grown man that it is indeed bad to speed 28km over the speed limit. For any reason. And in a branded vehicle at that. Anyway so then I had to do the letter which was fine but it’s such a confusing template so I suggested some alterations to the Head of and she said they were excellent and she would change the template letter to include my suggestions, so that made me feel good. I enjoy that part of my work, I think I like processes and policies and all of that stuff. Idk why someone with social anxiety thought it would be smart to get into PEOPLE advisory. But like I said, as thick as a brick.
I had such a fun chat with him this evening, he makes me all giggly and silly and I hate myself for saying that. The word giggle is so bleh. I mean it’s a cute word but it feels wrong to say for whatever reason. It’s like when people say “hehe” in texts or whatever, it makes me feel gross even though I don’t even mind it. I think in the right context from the right person it’s fine, but I’ve never experienced that so idk. Now I’m thinking of… something. Something we watched. And the subtitles had it as “heh heh” and I’m thinking sopranos. Anyway newsflash to no one: I love him a hellllllll of a lot.
I wish I didn’t have to go to the office tomorrow. It’s so annoying. I know it’s good for me and also my manager has outright asked me to, so I kind of have to regardless, but also I’ll just focus on the fact it’s good for me to be properly out of the house and stuff. And it has perks I guess, I can have sushi for lunch, peruse the bookshop nearby and I also don’t snack when I’m at the office, I take nuts with me but I don’t eat them because I get all anxy about if people can hear me chewing or if they think I’m some kind of insatiable ogre who can’t wait til lunch or dinner. But so I just have a few bits of sushi for lunch. Although I really want to try this Vietnamese place, they have a salad that looks so bloody good, but I’ve never been and it looks like the kind you line up for like subway and that sends a barrage of anxiety through me so maybe sometime in the future. But I also tend to get more done and idk. It’s good for me. I’ll just keep telling myself that while I hate life two days a week for the foreseeable. It’s not even that bad, it is bad anxiety wise - like yesterday I didn’t go to the bathroom for over an hour from when I needed to pee because of my anxiety, I also didn’t fill up my drink bottle or get another coffee at all for the whole day. So my anxiety is bad, but maybe over time it’ll get better, I’m sure it will, I just have to suck it up in the interim.
I think I’ll stop now because I have 10 mins exactly til 8 and I need to get entirely ready for bed and post this. I needed to blowdry my hair but I spent too long in the shower and now I don’t have time so oh well. Tbh I look like utter shite anyway lately so what’s a bad hair day to go with it? I’ll just put it up. I feel disgustingly ugly lately, I always do but especially lately. Okay now I have 8 minutes night night

It was 100% something made in USA, probably an episode of a TV series. I am almost sure that it isn't nothing connected with a prison, almost definitely - I checked all popular and unpopular movies about prison. It isn't "Cadence" (1990) too.
I remember only specific scene, where two men were in tough military unit. One of them was a well-built, tall guy, rather blond with long hair (someone like Jeff Daniells or Woody Harrelson). The main character (or supporting character) also ended up in this unit (I think he resembled Ray Liotta, but I may be wrong). With his own eyes, he sees an officer say to a long-haired blond man: "You're free, so you can go now," and lets him go as if on leave. The blond man walks calmly but confidently through the long corridor (maybe he even went through some kind of door, the kind with a photocell). The officer then treacherously shoots the unsuspecting prisoner in the back. The blond man was killed, and the main character is terrified. The cruel officer says to him: "You'll get tired." or "You will suffer".

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cl5548dq2dno
Mandy McAuley Reporter, BBC Spotlight Published 21 May 2024, 06:01 BST Updated 1 hour ago A loyalist killer has claimed the Ulster Volunteer Force (UVF) believed Billy Wright, the organisation’s leader in Mid Ulster, was a state agent.
Laurence Maguire told BBC NI’s Spotlight programme he had been called to answer questions about Wright for a UVF inquiry in the 1990s.
Maguire said he had begun to have suspicions when Wright stopped him from killing three suspected Irish Republican Army (IRA) members, who were later killed by the republican group - accused of being state agents.
The revelation comes after the government asked the Supreme Court to rule on whether to keep some intelligence on UVF murders a secret.
Laurence Maguire Image caption, Laurence Maguire speaking to BBC Northern Ireland’s Spotlight programme
The loyalist paramilitary group has been linked to multiple killings.
Parts of Laurence Maguire’s interview were first broadcast in 2019, but further details of what he told Spotlight have become more relevant because of information which emerged at recently stalled inquests.
Maguire, who was jailed in 1994 for five murders, told Spotlight that Wright had asked him to track three men believed to be in the IRA.
He described following them weekly, and his plan to shoot them in a rural park outside Dungannon.
But, he said, whenever he proposed the attack, Billy Wright “was putting it back”.
“I thought there was something strange about it, and when I look back now, it seems there was a lot of strange things about it,” Maguire said.
Aidan Starrs, John Dignam and Gregory Burns IMAGE SOURCE,PACEMAKER Image caption, L-R Aidan Starrs, John Dignam and Gregory Burns were abducted and killed by the IRA
Shortly afterwards, in July 1992, the three men – Gregory Burns, Aidan Starrs and John Dignam – were abducted and killed by the IRA.
The IRA said all three men were informers, and had been involved in the murder of Portadown woman Margaret Perry because she had learned that Burns was working for the intelligence services.
Former IRA member Tommy McKearney, whose brother and uncle were killed by Wright’s gang, said Maguire’s story raised the question of whether Wright had been protecting the IRA men because they were informants.
If Wright “was an agent”, he asked, “was he acting on orders to prevent Laurence Maguire operating against them?”
Maguire said he had subsequently been questioned by the UVF as part of an investigation into “suspicions” about Wright.
“I think it came to light that he was definitely working for somebody else.
“I just call it the Crown," he said.
Bernie McKearney Image caption, Bernie McKearney's husband and parents were killed in 1992
An inquest into UVF murders in Mid Ulster heard earlier this year that the late Progressive Unionist Party leader, David Ervine, had headed just such an inquiry into Billy Wright.
The court heard the investigation had collapsed when another senior UVF figure, and suspected police informer, Robin Jackson, did not show up to testify against Wright.
Jackson, who has since died, was also named in court documents as being suspected of involvement in a number of attacks in Mid Ulster.
Bernie McKearney’s husband and parents were killed in attacks carried out by Mid Ulster UVF in 1992.
Inquests into the deaths of Kevin and John McKearney, and Charles and Teresa Fox, stalled earlier this year when the secretary of state took legal action to prevent some material from being released.
“I do get emotional at times and I hate it, because I try to be a strong person,” Bernie McKearney said.
“But it has been hard knowing that if Kevin had have got the protection that state agents got, he could be living today."
Kevin and John McKearney scene IMAGE SOURCE,PACEMAKER Image caption, Kevin and John McKearney were attacked in the family butcher shop in Moy
Other former UVF figures have also accused Wright of being an agent.
Former Police Ombudsman Baroness Nuala O’Loan said, “I think we know that Billy Wright was an informant."
She is critical of the government’s legal action, describing it as “absolutely appalling”.
“There is no justification whatsoever for denying them information which may have been of some significance to national security 30 years ago or years ago, but which now cannot, in many cases, be of any significance whatsoever.”
Wright broke away from the UVF in 1996 to form the Loyalist Volunteer Force and was killed in the Maze Prison the following year.
All Troubles-era cases are now being referred to a new body known as the Independent Commission for Reconciliation and Information Recovery (ICRIR).
The Chief Constable of the Police Service of Northern Ireland (PSNI), Jon Boutcher, has said he is prepared to give material to new investigators “without condition and without redaction”.
PSNI chief constable Jon Boutcher IMAGE SOURCE,PA Image caption, The Chief Constable Jon Boutcher said he is prepared to give police material to new investigators
The Parliamentary Under Secretary of State at the Northern Ireland Office, Lord Caine, encouraged families to work with the ICRIR, external.
“This is now before the courts and we have to await the court’s judgement," he said.
“What I would do, is encourage families who have lost loved ones, or whose loved ones are seriously injured, to work with the new body under the distinguished leadership of Sir Declan Morgan.”
In April it emerged Laurence Maguire would be prosecuted for conspiracy to murder and possession of firearms, following admissions he made to the Spotlight Programme broadcast in 2019.
Spotlight: Killer Secrets is available to watch on the BBC iPlayer and on BBC One Northern Ireland at 22.40 on Tuesday 21 May.

Hello!
I have a geometry model of a structure made of beam elements(BEAM181) with few lumped masses (MASS21) and 1D springs-damper(COMBIN14) acting on different DOF with both linear and nonlinear damping. The masses are connected to the rest of the structure using rbe3, whereas the springs/dampers have a node connected to the structure and another one that is somewhere else in the space, constrained in the DOF the spring/damper is acting. I ran this geometry first in a modal analysis encountering no errors. Now I am trying with the transient analysis that would be final goal for the research but it gave the following errorin the at LSSOLVE command: node I and J for element [COMBIN14 element number] are not coincident. I tried to fix it by putting the second node of the element at the same location but I still have problems, and I did not find any clear requirement in the Element Reference that the nodes have to be coincident. Do they have to be? Does anyone know how to fix this code?
Here are the MAPDL lines where I define these elements:
lumped mass element -> floaters (3d with rotary inertia + coordinate system parallel to node) et,2,mass21,0,0,0
!elements -> damping & stiffness of floaters et,3,combin14,,1 !spring-damper ux (mooring stiffness) et,5,combin14,,2 !spring-damper uy (mooring stiffness) et,4,combin14,,3 !spring-damper uz (mooring stiffness+ heave c33) et,6,combin14,,4 !spring-damper rotx (pitch c44) et,7,combin14,,5 !spring-damper roty (roll c55)
!connectors et,9,combin14,1,1 et,10,combin14,1,2 et,11,combin14,1,3 et,12,combin14,1,4 et,13,combin14,1,5 et,14,combin14,1,6
!! define nodes for lumped masses !floaters masses COG !left down n,1,-L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),h_fl_up/2 n,2,-L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_down/2 n,3,-L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_down+T_fl/2 !added mass !right down n,4,L_tot+L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),h_fl_up/2 n,5,L_tot+L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_down/2 n,6,L_tot+L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_down+T_fl/2 !added mass !centre up n,7,L_tot/2,(L_t-L_obl)*sin(pi/3),h_fl_up/2 n,8,L_tot/2,(L_t-L_obl)*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_down/2 n,9,L_tot/2,(L_t-L_obl)*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_down+T_fl/2 !added mass
!! define nodes for hd spring-damper second nodes !left down n,10,-L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+T_fl/12 n,11,-L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+2*T_fl/12 n,12,-L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+3*T_fl/12 n,13,-L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+4*T_fl/12 n,14,-L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+5*T_fl/12 !right down n,15,L_tot+L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+T_fl/12 n,16,L_tot+L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+2*T_fl/12 n,17,L_tot+L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+3*T_fl/12 n,18,L_tot+L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+4*T_fl/12 n,19,L_tot+L_obl/2*cos(pi/3),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+5*T_fl/12 !centre up n,20,L_tot/2,(L_t-L_obl)*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+T_fl/12 n,21,L_tot/2,(L_t-L_obl)*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+2*T_fl/12 n,22,L_tot/2,(L_t-L_obl)*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+3*T_fl/12 n,23,L_tot/2,(L_t-L_obl)*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+4*T_fl/12 n,24,L_tot/2,(L_t-L_obl)*sin(pi/3),-h_fl_tot+5*T_fl/12
!define nodes for mass connectors n,25,-L_obl/2*cos(pi/3)-dist_conn*cos(angle_conn),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3)+dist_conn*sin(angle_conn),h_fl_up/2 n,26,L_tot+L_obl/2*cos(pi/3)+dist_conn*cos(angle_conn),L_obl/2*sin(pi/3)+dist_conn*sin(angle_conn),h_fl_up/2 n,27,L_tot/2-dist_conn*cos(angle_conn),(L_t-L_obl)*sin(pi/3)+dist_conn*sin(angle_conn),h_fl_up/2 n,28,L_tot/2+dist_conn*cos(angle_conn),(L_t-L_obl)*sin(pi/3)+dist_conn*sin(angle_conn),h_fl_up/2
!second nodes spings mass connector n,29,-L_obl+L_obl/2*cos(a),L_obl/2*sin(a),0 n,30,L_tot+L_obl-L_obl/2*cos(a),L_obl/2*sin(2*a),0 n,31,L_tot*cos(a)-L_obl/2*cos(a),L_obl*sin(2*a)+L_tot*sin(a)+L_obl/2*sin(a),0 n,32,L_tot-L_tot*cos(a)+L_obl/2*cos(a),L_obl*sin(2*a)+L_tot*sin(a)+L_obl/2*sin(a),0
!lumped masses for floaters type,2 !up real,1 en,1,1 en,2,4 en,3,7 r,1,m_fl_up,m_fl_up,m_fl_up,I_fl_xx_up,I_fl_yy_up,I_fl_zz_up
!down real,2 en,4,2 en,5,5 en,6,8 r,2,m_fl_down,m_fl_down,m_fl_down,I_fl_xx_down,I_fl_yy_down,I_fl_zz_down
!added mass real,3 en,7,3 en,8,6 en,9,9 r,3,m_xx,m_yy,m_zz,I_xx,I_yy,I_zz
!spring-damper element for floaters type,3 !spring-damper ux (mooring stiffness) real,4 en,10,3,10 en,11,6,15 en,12,9,20 r,4,c_x,0
type,4 !spring-damper uy (mooring stiffness) real,5 en,13,3,11 en,14,6,16 en,15,9,21 r,5,c_y,0
type,5 !spring-damper uz (mooring stiffness+ heave c33) real,6 en,16,3,12 en,17,6,17 en,18,9,22 r,6,c_z+c_33,0
type,6 !spring-damper rotx (pitch c44) real,7 en,19,3,13 en,20,6,18 en,21,9,23 r,7,c_44,0
type,7 !spring-damper roty (roll c55) real,8 en,22,3,14 en,23,6,19 en,24,9,24 r,8,c_55,0
!lumped masses connectors type,2 real,9 en,25,25 en,26,26 en,27,27 en,28,28 r,9,m_tot_ccs/2
!springs connectors !ux type,9 real,10 en,29,25,29 en,30,26,30 en,31,27,31 en,32,28,32 r,10,k_conn,b1_conn,b2_conn
!uy type,10 real,11 en,33,25,29 en,34,26,30 en,35,27,31 en,36,28,32 r,11,k_conn,b1_conn,b2_conn
!uz type,11 real,12 en,37,25,29 en,38,26,30 en,39,27,31 en,40,28,32 r,12,k_conn,b1_conn,b2_conn
!rotx type,12 real,13 en,41,25,29 en,42,26,30 en,43,27,31 en,44,28,32 r,13,k_conn,b1_conn,b2_conn
!roty type,13 real,14 en,45,25,29 en,46,26,30 en,47,27,31 en,48,28,32 r,14,k_conn,b1_conn,b2_conn
!rotz type,14 real,15 en,49,25,29 en,50,26,30 en,51,27,31 en,52,28,32 r,15,k_conn,b1_conn,b2_conn
!---- !linking floaters lumped masses to structure !--- !left down ksel,s,kp,,1 ksel,a,kp,,23 ksel,a,kp,,11 ksel,a,kp,,53 nslk,s rbe3,1,all,all rbe3,2,all,all rbe3,3,all,all
!right down ksel,s,kp,,5 ksel,a,kp,,14 ksel,a,kp,,6 ksel,a,kp,,37 nslk,s rbe3,4,all,all rbe3,5,all,all rbe3,6,all,all
!centre up ksel,s,kp,,18,19,1 ksel,a,kp,,50,51,1 nslk,s rbe3,7,all,all rbe3,8,all,all rbe3,9,all,all
!---- !linking connectors lumped masses to structure !---
!left down ksel,s,kp,,23 ksel,a,kp,,33 ksel,a,kp,,53 nslk,s rbe3,25,all,all
!right down ksel,s,kp,,14 ksel,a,kp,,36 ksel,a,kp,,37 nslk,s rbe3,26,all,all
!centre up left ksel,s,kp,,18 ksel,a,kp,,51,52,1 nslk,s rbe3,27,all,all
!centre up right ksel,s,kp,,19 ksel,a,kp,,50,52,2 nslk,s rbe3,28,all,all
!---------- !constraints springs for floaters hydro properties !----------
!constraints on second node nsel,s,node,,10,20,5 d,all,ux,0
nsel,s,node,,11,21,5 d,all,uy,0
nsel,s,node,,12,22,5 d,all,uz,0
nsel,s,node,,13,23,5 d,all,rotx,0
nsel,s,node,,14,24,5 d,all,roty,0
!---------- !constraints springs for connectors !----------
!constraints on second node nsel,s,node,,25,28,1 d,all,ux,0 d,all,uy,0 d,all,uz,0 d,all,rotx,0 d,all,roty,0 d,all,rotz,0

Sorry if this sub doesn’t accept such sale-out posts(I will remove the post if so) but trying it as my last resort as I’m unable to sell my Kingsize bed on marketplace. The bed was bought 7 months ago (in fact made on order) from a furniture shop and it cost me 43.5k including transportation.
Now as I relocate, I need to sell it off immediately. I am quoting 28k for this sturdy, elegant and king size(measures 7*6 ft) which comes with box and cabinet storage and made of Solid wood.
Anyone interested can DM me here and we can then talk business! I don’t have a way to attach pictures here so if interested, plz reach out.