Hello everyone! I'm using Rode NT5 MP for recording city ambiance etc. I'm using Rode WS8 for wind protection, but it seems that it consumes quite much of the heights, which I obviously would like to avoid. I heard that Bubblebee Industries solutions do the job way better. (I used to have small BB wind protection for my Lom Usi and imho it worked surprisingly well.) Do you have any experience with BB? Are they significantly better,or just a little? The price for Spacer Bubble is pretty high and I'm wondering if it's worth the effort. Also, there is a cheaper version called Windkiller (short or long fur). Any experience anyone?
Also, did anyone find any graph showing WS8 exact frequency response? (Not sure if it's a proper name for that, but you know what I mean.)
Thanks for any thoughts!

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As a child I watched a cartoon on CD. I've been trying to come up with the name of that cartoon for a year now, please help me. that is: 2 yellow animated characters (I'm not 100% sure), one younger, the other older, the point was that one drew something and the other had to guess it, we as viewers also guessed, the story was episodic and in every part there was drawing something else, the task was to teach children to draw. If I'm not mistaken, the characters couldn't talk and communicated through thought bubbles.

As a child I watched a cartoon on CD. I've been trying to come up with the name of that cartoon for a year now, please help me. that is: 2 yellow animated characters (I'm not 100% sure), one younger, the other older, the point was that one drew something and the other had to guess it, we as viewers also guessed, the story was episodic and in every part there was drawing something else, the task was to teach children to draw. If I'm not mistaken, the characters couldn't talk and communicated through thought bubbles.

Lately, both in person and on this sub, I have seen a worrying amount of misinformation spreading about the political party Aon Tu. This misinformation either states that they are a left/liberal party or that they are not right/conservative. This is however clearly wrong as any amount of inspection of their statements and social media makes clear; any clear dive into their policies and statements make it clear that they are instead very right wing, if not far right. They use the many familiar terms associated with similar parties, hold the same stances, and even retweet them and their content.
In order to illustrate this below I am presenting the various tweets made by Peadar Tóibín (the current leader of the party, their founder, and currently sole elected official) as well as their official twitter account. I have limited it solely to tweets due to time and space constraints, I have also had to limit the amount of tweets due to the same constraints There is more and I strongly encourage anyway to check their accounts for themselves. If there is interest I can do a deep dive into their other socials and statements, however I do not think there is a way to access the backlog of debates they have had on RTE and radio unfortunately. I believe this thread will stand on it's own however and other such threads won't be needed.
I will present the below tweets without comment, sorting them only into sections for ease of reading. Some may contain a note below in order to give more context as to what the tweet is referencing. The one section I did not include was the various tweets on the referendum, this is because due to recency I did not think it was needed.
Edit: Fixed some formatting errors below that escaped notice when first posting, as well as one entry being under the wrong heading.
Vaccine Denial:
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 12/07/2021

Aontú opposes vaccine Passports for indoor Hospitality.
Its discrimination against many people mostly the young.
Its mandatory vaccination through the back door.
Again the Irish Gov is alone in the whole of Europe in the extreme path it's taking.

Tweeted by Toibin; 17/10/2021

99.7% of the adult population in Waterford is fully vaccinated, yet it has one of the highest Covid-19 incidence rates in the country.
The truth is the Gov don't know why this is happening.
Now they will refuse entry to pubs to 0.3% unvaccinated to see does that work. #NPHET

Tweeted by Toibin; 10/01/2022

No, it's not April Fools day.
That people being paid by the state are actually discussing this is incredible.
FF/FG/Greens need to knock this madness on the head ASAP.

Note: Linked news article can be found here; Nphet to consider mandatory vaccination, department preparing paper on legal and ethical aspects
Tweeted by Toibin; 12/10/2022

I have submitted this question;
To ask the Minister for Health, has he or his department ever received any data, evidence or information from Pfizer that indicates that that the Pfizer Covid Vaccine was ever tested in terms of its ability to stop the transmission of Covid?

Anti Covid Lockdown:
Tweeted by Toibin; 15/11/2020

480 people got Cancer today.
24 people died of Cancer today
27 people died of Heart Disease and Stroke today.
This will hardly get a mention in the media today.
#COVID19

Tweeted by Toibin; 13/05/2021

8 deaths related to Covid were reported yesterday.
We share our deepest sympathies with these families.
The manner in which Covid deaths are being reported is concerning.
They were all from March or earlier.
Reporting them yesterday gives people a false impression of risk.

Tweeted by Toibin; 26/05/2021

The majority of people who died from Covid caught Covid in a Nursing Home or a Hospital.
So while the whole country was shut closed most people died in locations that were run by or regulated by the government.
This is an incredible situation.

Note: A video is attached.
Tweeted by Toibin; 05/06/2021

All the the people with Covid in Hospital in Ireland would fit on 1 Double Decker Bus.
Yet people were baton charged in Dublin last night and
Pubs and Restaurants wont open indoors for another month.
#ItsTimeForCommonSense #OpenHospitality #southwilliamst #Aontú

Tweeted by Toibin; 14/07/2021

The Government's Hospitality Discrimination Bill has passed all stages in the Dáil after only a few hours of debate.
It will be now legal to discriminate against certain Irish citizens.
A sad day for Ireland.

Note: The bill which has a picture taken of it in the tweet can be read here.
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 30/10/2021

Some citizens are allowed into pubs.
Some citizens are not.
It's stunning that this has happened in the 21st century.
It's stunning that so much of society has just accepted it.
Worst of all, it's not even working.

Tweeted by Toibin; 24/11/2021

I have recieved information that the Goverment,
has carried out NO scientific research into the effectiveness or otherwise of the Covid Pass.
At all.
#FollowTheScience #TheySaid

Tweeted by Toibin; 17/12/2021

Are the Gov going to say that a healthy young person thats triple vaccinated along with their Covid Pass can't have a pint after 5pm.
What's the point of it all so?

Tweeted by Toibin; 21/01/2022

Very interesting to see Nphet and the Dept of Health go from researching Mandatory Vaccines to lifting restrictions in 10 days!

Anti LGBT:
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 24/10/2022

Women live in period poverty just a few miles from the Dáil.
Instead of helping them,
your virtual signalling political establishment
put a tampon machine in the men's toilet in the Dáil.

Tweeted by Toibin; 16/02/2023

Plans by FF, FG & Greens to change the law to allow 16 year olds to legally change gender, against advice of medical experts,
shows how completely alienated the political bubble is from the people of Ireland.
Aontú will oppose this and seek a return to commonsense and science.

Tweeted by Aon Tu; 05/03/2023

When Minister O Gorman refused redress to many who had been in Mother and Baby Homes because of the 'lack of money', he raided hundreds of thousands from the Magdalene Scheme and Travellers supports & diverted the funding towards the LGBTQ+ Community.

Note: There is an article linked in the tweet, about an accusation made by Toibin. Read it here
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 06/03/2023

Varadkar is wrong. 9 &10 year old children are too young to be taught about transgenderism. We have a duty of care to children.
No research has been has been carried out on the impact of such education.

Tweeted by Toibin; 07/03/2023

I've asked the Minister for Ed what research has the Dept of Education carried out
on the impact on primary school children of delivering material on Transgenderism to them in the classroom?
We've a duty of care to children.
Education should be based on evidence not ideology.

Tweeted by Aon Tu; 08/03/2023

Tóibín asked Varadkar if his Gov had carried out any research as to the impact on 8 & 9 year old children of teaching about transgenderism in primary school.
Leo refused to answer the question.
Radical changes are being introduced against majority consent.

Note: There is an attached video.
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 15/03/2023

Many people have been shocked by Paul Murphy's announcement.
But what's more shocking is that FF, FG, SF and the Greens,
are on exactly the same page as the hard left parties on teaching this ideology in every primary school in the country.

Tweeted by Toibin; 21/05/2023

This is incredible. All the actual crime that is happening on our streets and Gardaí are wasting time like this.
Even though there was no arrest here, this harassment creates a clear chilling effect on free speech and political discourse.

Note: There is an attached video in the tweet retweeted by Toibin, in it a Gardai is holding a polite conversation with an American holding a sign against "Gender Ideology." In their Twitter bio they describe themselves; "Father of two girls. Traveling the world to expose gender ideology and why children cannot consent to medical transition."
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 07/07/2023

Growing concern among parents that the new curriculum for 12 & 13 years in school is not age appropriate & is not science based.
Gender identity ideology is now mandatory for schools & thousands of parents will have no option but to withdraw their child from class.

Note: This article is linked on the topic of a statement made by Toibin.
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 23/07/2023

This is why so many are angry with the Minister for Culture Wars, Helen McEntee.
Homicides are up, murder attempts are up, rape & sexual assaults are up, theft is up. Yet....
Gardaí management are focused on allowing male born Gardaí use women’s toilets.

Note: There is an attached article; here
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 28/09/2023

The Green Party are becoming increasingly authoritarian in nature.
If you dissent from government sanctioned views, you will be investigated.
This is the opposite of a liberal democracy.

Note: There is a linked article; it pertains to an investigation by the IABA into the usage of their premises by a "Christian Group" advocating for the removal of all LGBT+ content from the SPHE curriculum.
Tweeted by Toibin; 14/03/2024

It is reckless beyond belief to give dangerous chemicals and irreversible surgery to children with gender dysphoria.
This must be made illegal in Ireland immediately.

Note: Includes a retweet of this news article.
Anti Hatespeech bill:
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 15/06/2023

Helen McEntee has become the Minister for Culture Wars.
Incredibly Varadkar accused PBP of being a threat to Free Speech.
FG, FF & the Greens are the biggest threat to free speech.

Note: There is a link article here.
Tweeted by Toibin; 26/07/2023

US gives Dublin a security warning for US citizens travelling to Ireland.
Meanwhile Minister McEntee is too busy with the Hate Speech Bill and Safe Zone Bill to worry about real people suffering actual crime.

Tweeted by Toibin; 28/03/2024

Helen McEntee is distracted by the Culture Wars.
People just want her to do her job, & make the streets safer.
Instead, she spent the last two years on a Hate Crime Bill no one wants. #BinTheBill

Note: There is an attached video.
Other:
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 15/02/2023

In the Dáil yesterday the hard left tried to close down a discussion on migration by calling people names.
This issue is too important. People have a right to respectfully ask questions and challange government policy.

Note: There is an attached video; it does not depict such name calling but rather Toibin accusing the government of name calling.
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 24/07/2023

Another day and another culture war imported by the government from America.

Note: A retweet from Gript media with an attached video.
Tweeted by Toibin; 12/03/2024

There is a battle over the narrative of the referendum defeat happening at the moment.
Some within the political & media bubble want to erase the fact that so many people have had enough of the culture wars and want the country to get back to commonsense and bread and butter.

Tweeted by Aon Tu; 19/03/2024

At a Dept of Education 'In Service' day,
their staff told secondary school teachers not to use the word 'Mother' in class as they said it was not inclusive.
They are implementing Gov policy.
Aontú disagrees wholeheartedly with this policy.
Happy Mothers Day.

Tweeted by Toibin; 10/04/2024

Says the man who seeks to delete more Irish sovereignty with the EU migration pact.

Note: A retweet from Simon Harris talking about the need to defend Ukraine's sovereignty.
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 11/04/2024

The decision by FG, FF and Green MEPs to cede the power to control immigration into Ireland to Brussels was a serious mistake. Aontú oppose this pact and will fight to retain and regain sovereignty in Europe #aontú

RULES:

1. No stores or dealers selling on here. We won't stop stores from responding to sell posts with buy offers, though. At that point, it's up to the seller to accept or reject the offer.
   
2. Do not spam this thread. Your sell/trade offer(s) should be confined to one post per week. If you list multiple cards as separate orders, or multiple lots of cards as separate orders, do so in the same post with a clear delineation. As a seller, you may post whether you want offers within the thread or whether you want a private message. If you want to make this different for different listings, that's your prerogative. State what country you're shipping from and include shipping price+method for your own country. If you are willing to ship to other countries, say so.
   
3. No eBay posts.
   
4. If a card is sold/traded, edit your post and invalidate any pending offers for that card. "Short selling" is not acceptable here, since we're dealing in physical goods and shipping times may be an issue, especially if the buyer is a tournament player. Do not short sell cards.
   
5. Buyers: Post your offer directly underneath a sell listing, unless you are topping someone else's offer, in which case you should post directly underneath that offer.
   
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9. Needless to say, we're Magic players. We don't necessarily have to pay in cash. It's entirely up to the seller whether to consider "2 Force of Will" as a highelower bid than $160.
   
10. There is also a deckbox.org trading area that can be used as well, at http://deckbox.org/communities/reddit_mtg_trades.
    

If you have any comments about the rules rather than about a particular auction, feel free to discuss them here.
PAYPAL FEE INFO: (Quoted from Paypal)
Free when the money comes from PayPal balance or bank account.
2.9% + $0.30 USD when the money comes from a debit or credit card or PayPal Credit
MAILING INFO: See USPS Link.
SCAMMER INFO: I will not link it directly here, but be sure to check out the scammer list on deckbox before doing any trading to ensure yourself to having a safe trade!
You probably can't mail off more than one toploader in a normal envelope+stamp due to it being too rigid; and you shouldn't do this for more than $10-20 worth of cards anyway since there's no tracking. Get a bubble mailer and get it tracked.

Hi! So may kaibigan kaming (F) na galing sa long term relationship siguro mga lampas 2 years na sila ng bf niya (ex niya na ngayon), then boom nagbreak sila. Tapos si ate girl bigla nagpapapansin sa isa naming kaibigan after the breakup. During that time we did not find it weird na nakikipagclose siya sa kaibigan namin kasi friendly naman siya and bubbly siya as a person. But as time goes by, iba na yung interactions nila like minsan sila lang dalawa ang nagsasama and ang sweet nila sa isa’t-isa to the point na napapansin na namin na may something sakanila. Nakita pa namin na parang nasa getting to know stage na sila. To think na after ng breakup ni ate girl with her ex, wala pang 1 day dun na siya kay kuya dumidikit and we find it super weird kasi parang nakamove on na siya and parang wala lang nangyari sakanila ng ex niya.
Dahil dun na off kami sakanila ni kuya kasi fun fact, may jowa yung boy and still forda go lang din siya sa pakikipagclose kay ate girl. Narealize namin na cheating yung ginagawa ni kuya kaya naoff din kami sakanya. Kaya ayon di na namin masyado pinapansin yung dalawa and awkward na kami. We tried na magparinig sa ginawa nila HAHAHAHAHA. Sad part lang is parang walang guilt yung girl and parang gusto niya pa na magkasomething sila ni guy. Siguro habang sila ng ex niya crush niya na yung kaibigan naming lalaki. Hays ang saklap ng nangyari kasi close kami nung una pero dahil sa nangyari parang nasira yung image niya saamin.
What are your thoughts sa nangyari? Comment down because I want to know your opinion 😊

“We’re a meat family,” my dad would proudly tell strangers. He’d wait for the quizzical look, then launch into detail, starting with how many freezers we had, how long we could sustain ourselves on the contents. It was just his way of starting a conversation, which made sense when you considered that raising and home-killing animals for food was, for want of a better term, his life-long hobby. His prize possession was one of those industrial-sized vacuum sealers: you could put half a pig inside and wrap it in plastic so tightly that every wrinkle and skin fold waxed unreal with shiny detail.
If we hadn’t lived in a rural area, albeit semi-urbanised, I guess it would have been pretty weird. But the mostly farming-stock locals only found his extra enthusiasm a little bit odd.
When he wasn’t being a bit embarrassing talking about it, I never really paid much heed to his hobby. I had a child’s vaguely grateful awareness that though our family went through some lean financial times, our stomachs never suffered like some of the families around us. All the beef, pork, ham and bacon in those big old chest freezers passed down from his dad really could have fed us for years.
I should preface all this by saying that I wasn’t a particularly bright kid, though neither was I dumb. I didn’t fail badly at anything in school, I just never achieved beyond a pass. I didn’t know it yet back then, still quietly dreaming about being a ballet star or a dressage champion, but mediocrity was my destiny. And I think that’s why I got on so well with my Aunt Liz.
Liz was my dad’s live-in youngest sister. She was one of those women who get described as ‘bubbly’ — not really pretty, not really smart, not a lot going on besides just being… well, all Liz. But she was salt of the earth; kind, caring, and great with kids. She was the only person who would willingly mind my two older brothers, who fought like hellcats and caused more trouble than the whole last generation of my family combined. People would privately lament to my parents that it was a shame Liz didn’t have kids of her own, but dad would just shake his head and say Liz liked it that way – that all the fun of looking after kids is being able to give them back to their parents.
I guess she was like me; nice, but mediocre. Lovely, but somehow forgettable when she wasn’t doing something for you.
But when Liz left us, I couldn’t forget her.
In hindsight, it was pretty weird timing that we had a big fortieth birthday party for Liz right before she disappeared. She was radiant that night; she’d hired a local girl to do her hair and makeup, and it was honestly the first time I’d ever seen her look pretty. She’d even worn a push-up bra under a tight red dress, which flattered her very plump curves well enough that the neighbour’s farmhand was spotted disappearing into the woolshed with her for a snog. In my dawning awareness, that gave a plain girl hope: if Aunty Liz could get a guy at forty, maybe things would turn out okay for me.
Anyway, I couldn’t forget how her pink cheeks, her eyes, her whole self, glowed that night before Liz went to bed. She said it was the best birthday ever, and that she was very much looking forward to the next stage of her life.
Would I have done anything different, if I had known? If I had realised what, exactly, that next stage was?
The week after the party, Aunt Liz said she was going on a little holiday up north, to visit some old school friends. She packed her things – she didn’t honestly have that many – and drove her little orange mini out onto the main road. And with a wave of one fleshy hand, she was gone. Nobody really thought much of it when she didn’t call, because nobody rural had cellphones back then. And Liz was, as I said, somehow kinda forgettable when she wasn’t right in front of you.
When we hadn’t had contact for six weeks, Dad tracked down the land line numbers for their old school buddies. They were surprised to hear from him — Liz had never arrived, so they had just assumed she’d cancelled her visit. No-one had thought to check. I eavesdropped on the conversation, and it sounded for all the world like *they* had forgotten about Aunt Liz, too.
From there it became a missing person case. The local cops came and talked to all of us; the farmhand who’d been seen snogging her was briefly detained, then let go, dad got grilled at length, even my hellion brothers were questioned thoroughly to see if this was one of their wild and dangerous pranks gone wrong.
But everything was a dead end. Nobody knew where Liz was, or what had happened to her.
The remains of her old mini were found halfway across the country, burned out on a beach, on a derelict stretch of ragged, rocky coastline. The police assumed murder and combed the area for remains. But even the most expert divers couldn’t conquer the incredible undertow and fast-shifting seabed of that coastline to look for evidence, so none was forthcoming.
Eventually the cops collectively shrugged and said that there was really nothing more they could do unless more information suddenly came to light. The locals knew nothing, no witnesses had come forward, and the trail was cold. As far as anyone knew, poor aunt Liz had been murdered on some desolate beach, far away from her home.
It didn’t feel fair to me. She’d once mentioned wanting her remains buried on our farm, in the graveyard plot beside grandma and grandad.
So, in my grief, I went into her room to look for something of hers to bury beside them.
Like I said, Liz didn’t have many things. Her room was pretty spartan, and her wardrobe was mostly sensible farm stuff. There was one exception: she, like me, did like to read, and she had a pretty good collection of well-thumbed books. I think it’s the escapism – even the most mediocre girl can lose herself in the plot of some trashy romance novel, imagine there’s still hope of being swept off her feet by that handsome stableboy, his inexplicable yearning for chubby plain girls.
So I set myself the task of going through the books, to find the right one to bury in the graveyard plot.
Most of them were exactly what you’d expect, but some of them were racier than I was used to. I felt various parts of my body flushing and tingling, as I read breathless prose about calloused hands touching the softest flesh of the protagonist. Okay, if I’m honest with myself, I might have got a little *too* invested in my project at that point. But that was also why I persisted going through her entire collection, until I found the ragged paperback from 1970, entitled Tawny Sands. And inside that trashy cardboard romance cover, I discovered not the tale of Tawny Sands, but some carefully hand-cut, stitched-in pages. A handwritten story in my Aunt’s rounded penmanship: Memoirs of a Long Pig.
I read her story twice in a row, utterly gripped.
Aunt Liz was no Stephen King – heck, she wasn’t even the Goosebumps guy – but her story was gripping and compelling, and I couldn’t put it down. Even if I hadn’t known her, I think that would have been true.
The gist of it was that Liz, when she was sixteen, had discovered that our family had a very long history of eating what she described as ‘Long Pork’. It’s an antipodean term, anglicised from the Pacific Islands: human meat.
Like me, young Liz still had some hopes and dreams. In one of her many failed attempts to find a special talent, she’d taken up cooking as a hobby. Naturally, with our family’s overabundance of meat, she’d scoured the freezers in the shed for ingredients: the racks of ribs and stacks of pork chops, butcher-paper wrappings all neatly labelled with the first letter of the name of the animal they came from.
She found familiar meat from Rodney, one of the pigs that had been recently slaughtered, emblazoned with an ‘R’ in her father’s strong, blocky lettering. There were cutlets labelled ‘M’ for Mary, from one of the lambs she’d hand-reared, and ‘F’ for Ferdinand, the steer they’d killed the month before. But she couldn’t explain the many, many curious parcels of meat on one side of the huge freezer, all labelled ‘J’ – at least, not until she took it all out and assembled it as well as she could on the scoured concrete floor of the killing shed. A big, frozen jigsaw puzzle without the box, her best attempt to discover what kind of beast the pieces had come from.
The animal, she quickly realised, was a Long Pig. Her own Aunt Jenny, who had died the month before – just after her fortieth birthday.
Fortunately, or perhaps not, for Liz, her father entered the shed right at that moment and realised his daughter had discovered the family secret. He sat down calmly on the lid of the freezer, and explained to her that this was a long-running family tradition, dating back to at least before his grandfather had been born.
“There are always people in life, Liz,” he’d said, “who won’t really amount to much. They want to be useful, want to be more. They strive and they strive, trying job after job, hobby after hobby, trying to hit on something they’re really good at. Something that makes them special. Those people can waste their whole lives, chasing dreams that never come true. Eventually they die unfulfilled, knowing that all their time has been wasted. That what they leave behind will fade quickly.”
His voice was oddly gentle as he leaned down and patted one of the neatly wrapped cuts of Aunt Jenny, still sitting frozen on the shed floor.
“Your Aunt Jenny was one of those people. So was my Aunt Irene.” He paused to gaze at his daughter, his next words peppered with emphasis. “But you see, my sweet Liz, they did find a purpose in life. They did find a way to be special, and they left this world utterly certain of their gift.” He stood up, stretched his back. “Let me show you.”
Liz waited while my grandad meticulously stacked the meat back into the freezer, all but one J-marked parcel that looked for all the world like a thick venison steak. He took her back to the farmhouse, and reverently unwrapped the deep red, heavily marbled meat to let it thaw. Then he laid it in the family’s ancient, cast-iron pan, basting it with butter and rosemary until a heavenly scent filled the kitchen, and Aunt Liz couldn’t stop her mouth from watering.
“Just try it. Let her show you. You’ll see exactly what I’m talking about.”
Even though she knew it was her aunt, Liz couldn’t stop herself from taking that first bite. There was something transcendent about the smell, overriding her natural revulsion that this was human meat, not one of their farm animals. For the first time, she truly realised it: we’re just another kind of animal. And weren’t her memories of Mary the lamb almost as fond as her memories of Aunt Jenny?
Liz explained then, in her curly handwriting, the explosion of taste that had assaulted her when she tried the steak. It was tender, it was succulent, it was rich beyond imagining. The fats melted on her tongue, lingering somewhere between pork and beef, but oddly neither. The flavour of the meat defied identification; something familiar, yet not.
But one thing she couldn’t deny; it was the most delicious thing she had ever eaten. Tears dripped onto her plate, mingled with the juice, the grease — not grief, but a pure, real, giddy delight.
“You’re tasting your aunt’s love for this family,” my grandad explained. “Her entire life was carefully curated, to eventually make unforgettable moments for us, just like this. This was her way of being special. This was the greatest gift she could possibly bring to our world – and because she realised that, she died with not a single regret. She knew her life had purpose. She was perfectly, completely fulfilled.”
I felt those words. I felt them lodge in my own belly, settling uncomfortably deep. I knew Aunt Liz, probably better than anyone else in the family. I’d seen how fucking happy she’d been on her fortieth, how goddamn fulfilled she was, despite apparently being a *nobody* and achieving *nothing*. Somehow, in the space of a single day, she had gone from being a forgettable background character to becoming the *main character*, immortalising herself in our family’s history with her sacrifice. Quite literally becoming part of all of us, forever.
I went to the killing shed after I finished with the book. I looked inside the freezers.
But there were no vacuum-sealed packages labelled ‘L’, no matter how deep I dug into the frozen stacks of plastic-wrapped flesh. Panicked now, not sure if I wanted to connect all the dots or unconnect them, I tried to think back over the last few months, recall any meals that had been unusually good. A few Sundays ago, we’d had a stew that really hit the spot and left me craving more. And I realised that the family had a really good night that night; my brothers behaved themselves, my parents didn’t fight, and grandma and grandad had been there. Hadn’t they looked far more… expectant than they should have?
I strained my brain, trying to recall if I’d seen the homekill bag on the kitchen bench – if I’d registered what letter it was. I knew it wasn’t an L. I would have remembered if it was an L.
And then it hit me, the memory, the connection, sizzling as if branded with a hot iron.
It had been an ‘E’.
E for Elizabeth. Not for Edward the pig.
I snorted at my own stupidity – of *course* Liz was short for Elizabeth – and as I comprehended my lack of smarts, I felt something give inside me.
I wasn’t clever, and nothing, nothing would ever make me smart. I had no big talents. I wasn’t beautiful, or even cute – and even if I had a million plastic surgeries, it still wouldn’t fulfill me. It wouldn’t be real.
I was a Liz.
I was a Jenny.
I was whoever the first aunt had been, the aunt who had dedicated her life to making her flesh as delicious as possible, who had worked every damn minute to be the best Long Pig she could ever be.
I wondered how many magical family evenings had been spent eating Aunt Jenny. How many glorious, satisfying, memorable dishes had been made out of her.
And… I wanted that. I wanted to finally know I had a *purpose* in life. One so simple, and so easy to achieve.
I wanted what Aunt Liz had.
***
It's my fortieth birthday today and I’m so fucking excited. For the last twenty-four years, I’ve dedicated myself to this moment; I’ve eaten exactly what I needed to, I’ve exercised just enough, but not too much, to maintain that perfect balance of marbling vs tenderness. I’ve relaxed and meditated to keep all those amazing flavours inside of me. I’ve researched all the greatest meats in the world, from prime Angus beef to A5 Wagyu. I really think I may have outdone myself.
I’m having my hair and makeup done at the local salon this afternoon, and I’m going to look so pretty; all prize piggy on show at the fair. I’m even going to have a big red ribbon in my hair, in memory of Aunt Liz.
Maybe there’ll be a cute boy I can snog in the wool shed, maybe there won’t – I don’t really care; because the most important, most certain thing is that I’m going to be the most delicious Long Pig in the history of our entire family.
I’m going to make everyone so damn happy, and I’m just so glad I can share my story with you all, instead of hiding it in a grubby book like poor Aunt Liz.
My only real disappointment? That you won’t get to taste me.
Reader, I have loved, loved my life. My Long Pork will be out of this world: once tasted, never, ever forgotten.

I had a coworker who changed his name to Cranberry Bubble Tea on a dare in his 20s. Also there's a weird YouTuber with a kid named Wolverine Tiger De Guzman in Japan. Do you guys know any other funny names?

So, let's start by accepting that all rings are not created equal. Each ring is a ring, but each ring has its own circumstances that determine how they are remembered down the line. What contributes into that? Generally, it seems the most considered factors are narrative and path, narrative being the behind-the-scenes story context that gives this ring meaning to fans of the players and teams, and path being the strictly basketball elements like the opponents played and actual performance. Let's look at the recent rings going back 20 years. Disclaimer, I just started watching basketball in 2010, so I've probably missed bits of context from the 2000s ones.
I scored them out of 5 based on narrative and path, added the totals, and broke ties with my own subjective, sometimes biased opinion.

• (20th) 2018 Warriors. You won't find many non-Warriors/KD fans who respect this ring and 2017's for obvious reasons. Path-wise, they played good but not particularly great opponents besides Houston, and you can put an asterisk or two on that series if you want, though those Rockets were still a great team who would have won it all otherwise. 1/5 narrative, 3/5 path, 4/10 total.
• (19th) 2021 Bucks. A strong narrative for Giannis and the Bucks. Giannis dropped 50 to bring Milwaukee their first ring in 50 years and redeem himself for choking. The ring is unfortunately remembered along with a weird COVID season that meant half-full arenas for most of the season and some of the playoffs, as well as injuries (which will fall under the path criteria). This is the injuring. No one will remember this run without remembering KD's foot, which leads to further memories of Harden and Kyrie's injuries. Giannis does get kudos for powering through injury himself. 3.5/5 narrative, 2/5 path, 5.5/10 total.
• (18th) 2017 Warriors. This ring is funny. Narrative-wise, it's one of the weakest ever: KD ran to a 73-win team because he couldn't win by himself. On the court, though, this was the most dominant team in NBA history. You can knock them for not having to play a healthy Kawhi, but they still worked an elite Cavs team that would probably have won it all otherwise. 1/5 narrative, 4.5/5 path, 5.5/10 total.
• (17th) 2007 Spurs. Another legacy-building ring for Duncan and especially Parker, who was the first European to win Finals MVP. The Spurs also established themselves as the team with the 4th most championships ever. The hip-checking incident could have swung their 2nd round series against Phoenix though, and otherwise the run was a bit of a cakewalk. 4/5 narrative, 2/5 path, 6/10 total.
• (16th) 2023 Nuggets. Solid narrative, with Jokic leading Denver to their first ever ring and Jamal Murray showing his importance. A franchise winning their first ring gives plenty of automatic narrative points. The path points are where they fall short due to playing in a relatively weak West lacking other contenders and facing an 8th seed in the Finals. 4/5 narrative, 2/5 path, 6/10 total.
• (15th) 2020 Lakers. I don't think many still had LeBron lower than #2 all-time before this ring, but after it, I really hope no one does. He made history in winning a Finals MVP with a 3rd team. You can diminish it with the "needed AD" argument but two stars isn't a superteam. And of course COVID. The bubble did impact everyone the same, but it plays a big part in how the ring was remembered. The path itself was nothing special, but the Lakers took care of business, losing only 5 games the whole playoffs. 3/5 narrative, 3.5/5 path, 6.5/10 total.
• (14th) 2015 Warriors. A new superstar comes on stage, bringing GS their first title in 40 years. The three-point revolution has begun. Iguodala winning FMVP is still questionable. Path-wise, obviously the Cavs weren't healthy, and you can argue they would have won if they were considering how LeBron was playing. Otherwise, the Warriors made their way through a Western Conference gauntlet. I think Curry is the only player to have beaten all other 1st Team All-NBA players in one playoff run. 3.5/5 narrative, 3/5 path, 6.5/10 total.
• (13th) 2006 Heat. Miami's first ring ever and Shaq's first without Kobe. Memory of this one is somewhat marred by dubious officiating, but that may be my flair talking. That aside, beating two 60-win teams is very impressive. Off the top of my head, the only other team to accomplish that feat in recent memory is the 2009 Magic. 3/5 narrative, 4/5 path, 7/10 total.
• (12th) 2022 Warriors. Curry wins another without KD and captures his first Finals MVP, winning with a team that didn't really have any other star-level options compared to when they won their previous rings. Klay came back after 2 years out, and the Warriors weathered multiple injuries to have a strong regular season. The path was pretty unremarkable. They played injured Nuggets, but in the first round and they'd been injured the whole year. 4/5 narrative, 3/5 path, 7/10 total.
• (11th) 2008 Celtics. This ring began the modern superteam era and reignited the dormant Celtics/Lakers rivalry. KG, Pierce, and Allen won their first rings and denied Kobe a chance at 4. Dominant as they were in the regular season though, they probably should not have been taken to 7 in the first two rounds. 4/5 narrative, 3/5 path, 7/10 total.
• (10th) 2013 Heat. Ring #2 for Bron, capping a dominant individual season and establishing the Heat as a dynasty threat. You can say Ray Allen, but this is discussing how valuable the rings are to the teams, not players, so that doesn't factor into the path. I would weigh it positively into narrative due to giving us one of the most legendary shots of all time. The Heat also gave the Spurs their first Finals loss ever. Path-wise, the first two rounds were a cakewalk but the Heat took care of business, the Pacers were a strong team that went on to be the 1st seed next year, and the Spurs were still elite. 4/5 narrative, 3.5/5 path, 7.5/10 total.
• (9th) 2019 Raptors. First ring for the Raptors? Kawhi reminding the league who he is? Ending the Warriors dynasty? Buzzer-beater in Game 7? Amazing narrative. Path-wise, the fact that they faced the Warriors without KD and then Klay hurts them a lot. They still won, but the fact that you can make a very strong case that they wouldn't have without the injuries is a knock on what is otherwise a strong path. 5/5 narrative, 3/5 path, 8/10 total.
• (8th) 2005 Spurs. If Duncan wasn't already the greatest PF ever before this ring, he certainly was after it. This ring marks his 3rd, along with 3 FMVPs and 2 MVPs. A strong legacy-building ring. Great path as well, especially handling the reigning MVP and 1st seed in 5 games and defeating the defending champions. 4/5 narrative, 4/5 path, 8/10 total.
• (7th) 2010 Lakers. Same narrative as 2009 below, bolstering Kobe's case as a great in his own right without his name attached to Shaq's. The West was particularly strong this year, with the 8th seed Thunder having 50 wins. You could put an asterisk on the Finals due to Perkins' injury, but it was still a strong path otherwise. This was the first NBA Finals I watched. 4/5 narrative, 4/5 path, 8/10 total.
• (6th) 2009 Lakers. Kobe's first without Shaq, tying them in ring count and showing that Kobe didn't need Shaq to win. They made it through a strong Western Conference and beat an almost 60-win Magic team in 5. They did get fortunate in avoiding Boston due to injury, but that was well before the Finals. 4/5 narrative, 4/5 path, 8/10 total.
• (5th) 2012 Heat. LeBron wins his first-ever ring, with that legendary performance against Boston coming in the middle. Clean ring with a clean path: Melo's Knicks, solid Pacers squad, big 3 Boston's last stand, and big 3 OKC's last run before Harden leaves. 4/5 narrative, 4.5/5 path, 8.5/10 total.
• (4th) 2014 Spurs. A revenge tour. The Spurs denied LeBron a threepeat and gave Duncan a 5th ring, tying him with Kobe, and cemented Kawhi as an emerging superstar. This team is fondly remembered as one of the best pure basketball teams and for good reason. They played very strong opponents and handled them without too much trouble. 4/5 narrative, 5/5 path, 9/10 total.
• (3rd) 2016 Cavaliers. LeBron brings one to Cleveland for the first time ever and wins away from Miami, cementing him as #2 all-time in many people's eyes. And of course, he beat a 73-win team in an amazing 3-1 comeback with some of the clutchest plays ever by him and Kyrie. The Draymond suspension was iffy though as you can argue this directly swung the series. The East was also a cakewalk. 5/5 narrative, 4/5 path, 9/10 total.
• (2nd) 2004 Pistons. The Pistons remain one of the most unique champions in that they lacked a true superstar. They are remembered for exemplifying the low-scoring high-defense era of the 2000s and also ending the Kobe-Shaq era. Along the way, they beat the two-time defending conference champions in the Nets, a very strong Pacers team, and of course those Lakers. A very strong ring. 5/5 narrative, 4.5/5 path, 9.5/10 total.
• (1st) 2011 Mavericks. Perhaps the best narrative ever: Dirk overcomes the choker label and leads the Mavs to their first ring ever against a superteam thought unbeatable by many, casually ending the Lakers' run as two-time champions on the way. They played a gauntlet of difficult opponents on the way, dispatching 9 HOF players and 2 HOF coaches with relative ease. 5/5 narrative, 5/5 path, 10/10 total.

How do you think the 2024 ring will be remembered depending on who wins? The Timberwolves in particular have a chance to win a very strong ring. They would have beaten the Suns, Nuggets, Mavs, and most likely the Celtics. Gobert and KAT would throw off the playoff underperformer labels for good and Ant would emerge as one of this generation's greats. If the Mavs win, their ring would be a little weaker due to playing injured Kawhi and not having to go through the defending champs, but it would rebuild Kyrie's legacy, vindicate Cuban for tanking, establish Jason Kidd as a championship head coach, and of course give Luka a ring. If the Celtics win, they would have played relatively weak opponents for the first three rounds but could win some path points with a strong Finals showing; Tatum's perception could increase or decrease depending on how the Finals go, with his personal legacy points surely to be deducted if Brown wins Finals MVP. If the Pacers win, a strong showing against the Celtics and whoever they play in the Finals could erase the asterisks from the first two rounds. If the Pacers won while facing healthy Milwaukee and NY, it would be a crazy strong ring.

Race Name: No Time To Die Frontyard Ultra
Start: Friday 17 May 12pm
Entrants: Just over 150
Location: Edge of Central Business District Adelade, South Australia (Victoria Park)
Lap distance: circa 6.71km
Total i raced: 115.3km - winner did 396km
Organisers: Ultra Series SA
Me: 35 Male, Australian
Training and lead up
I’ve been running for almost 2.5 years now, with a primary focus on Zone 2 base building for the last two years.
My running goals are too varied - with wanting a fast 5km (PB: 19:39), a sub-50 12.1km (PB: 51:30), the six major marathons (done one non-major, 3:48, impacted by double quad cramps), a BQ marathon time, and 100milers (done a 50km ultra, a trail mara, and a road mara).
However, this was to be an A Race.
Further, I started a Pfitz 18/55 marathon training block four weeks before the race with a 3:15 target, and diligently completed each planned run for the first two weeks.
Before the Pfitz block, I hit 93km in the week.
February was 244km, March was 276km, April was 260km, May-to-date is 206km (from 6 runs). 46km/week on average for last 12 months.
Specific training was 6 laps on-course, 7 laps from home (35degrees), 6 laps on-course.
Two weeks before the Frontyard Ultra, I hurt my Achilles in my circa 3rd run using Alphafly 3, setting a HM PB on a Pfitz training run. I then did a horrible 6.5km on the Saturday, then six laps of the frontyard ultra course on Sunday with tears in the eye from pain (my first 100km week).
Saw a GP on Monday, got an ultrasound on Tuesday, got ultrasound results on Wednesday, saw a sportsdoctor on Thursday.
Diagnosis: Sub-acute tendonitis, everything that could be inflamed is inflamed, and a bursa.
Sportsdoctor: “The risk of doing the ultramarathon without doing a rupture is acceptable, but the risk of a tear in the medium term is unacceptable without taking appropriate action. Do the ultra, then come back a week later (which is still two days from now) to start treatment. “
Everyone else in my life, including the GP: “don’t run.”
Had pain at rest for pretty much all of this time, and a reasonable amount over the following 8 days – but less so by a couple of days before the race. Over this 12 day period I only did one run, a fairly slow parkrun halfway-through.
Late decision: Do the race, but try to avoid doing a permanent injury, don’t set a distance goal, just focus on learning stuff for next year.
Pre-Race:
· Packing list included circa 85 items
· Got picked up at 9:20am, arrived 10:00am
· Had a premium gazebo site (#recommended), which cost an extra $50.
· Set-up took about 30 minutes -> Mainly fluffing around with getting the gazebos appropriately lined up on the pre-booked site.
· Toilet’s were inadequate for the first 8 hours or so before six more opened – but, by then, it was dark so bush wees were the order of the night.
· Target was originally 50mins per lap
· Weather was sunny and max of about 21, and a minimum of around 13/14.
Race:
Used Garmin FR955 with highish brightness, and most accurate GPS, which used around 4% battery per hour.
Laps:
48:35
49:45
50:01
49:06
47:52
49:20
50:04
50:15
50:29
52:18
51:37
51:30
51:24
50:45
51:30
53:30
56:53 (deliberately slow – knew it was the last lap – had already asked Wifey to pack up)
Started the 18th lap, just because, and rung the bell after 58seconds. One other person did too.
I started with a run 1km, walk 1km strategy, but this went out the window pretty quickly and became not-strict as I wanted to talk to certain other competitors -> eg, mates, acquaintances I knew from other races, Johan Botha (eventual winner with 59 laps, also shoutout to Joel Sexton for the assist), some guy wearing a UTMB 2023 top, etc – so I was more than happy to change when I walked/ran to have those conversations. I don’t think that negatively impacted me.
Also, as the race went on (from about lap 11), my comfortable running speed was slipping from originally 5:15/km through to 6 to 7:30mins, to even 8mins by the end, which meant needing to run for the significant majority of the lap, and/or running at an uncomfortable speed. My comfortable walking speed also increased from 9:30/km to 13:30/km.
I believe that there were 35 runners that completed lap 17.
A lot of others were trying to do 3mins run, 2 mins walk, or 5mins run, 3mins walk, or some other variant, at the start.
Nutrition:
Drink: I drank 500ml on each of about 11 of the first 13 laps (and 350ml on the other two), and averaged about 400ml a lap for the remaining four laps. I also drank between each lap. I generally alternated between Tailwind (100g of carbs)/Powerade (1.5L(90g carbs)) /maurten drink mix (40g carbs) and water, on top of two cups of coke and a can of solo. I weighed the same when I got home versus when I left home – implying I drank slightly too much but was pretty spot on (noting that I ate food, so, I essentially lost “water” weight equal to the weight of food I ate). I wish I had packed another tailwind or two.
I ate a lot:
Prerace: rice bubbles, juice, killer python, banana x2, peanut butter sandwich, small packet of crisps.
Each hour: Approx. 50-90g of carbs every hour (probably more than necessary, but, without having gut issues I am happy with this decision), including liquid carbs, 6 killer pythons (101g carbs), 3 sandwiches, a small handful of koda gels and two handfuls of maurten gels, 150g of Haighs Speckles, a banana, watermelon pieces, chicken crimpys, small packet of tiny teddy’s, 3 small bags of crisps, 2xnaak waffles, hot chips, few lollies, a little bit of soup, etc. Generally one or two pieces whilst running, and one piece between laps.
I can confidently remember 1028g of carbs (60.5g/hour) – but probably missed a couple of pieces of food. For clarity, I also ate a lot in the hour before the race that I’m not including in this 1028g.
Drugs: I also took Celecoxib (on-top of morning dose), 4Panadeine Forte, 2Panadeine, 2Panadol, 2Nurofen --< I couldn’t have done many laps without these.
Shoes: I started in RC Elite v2, started to get knee pain, changed to Superblast, got worse knee pain, changed back to RC Elite v2, got 2 killer blisters on the side of my heel, changed to SC Trainer and had no additional feet problems – but the blisters were genuinely painful.
Why did I quit?
It was 5am, and I didn’t think it was worth trying to make it to sunrise at 7:05. I was in pain and didn’t fancy taking more opioids (Palexia was all I had left that I could find), my gut was starting to think about maybe playing up, my original goal pre-injury was 15 laps, my longest previous run before was 53km, my wife had been crewing for 12 straight hours and seemed disappointed when I went out for one of my final laps (she was telling people I was about to quit from lap 11). I became worried I was going to be permanently injuring my Achilles / rupture it… but, yes, I could have kept going if I needed to.
Post race
Went home, showered, slept for 2hours.
Been in constant pain since.
My ankle has swollen and continued to swell since, and I can’t really bend it still, which means I can’t walk anywhere near properly. It got worse from straight after the race Saturday morning, through to Monday, and is now getting better again (Tuesday) and is similar to how it looked on Sunday, but with a bit more mobility.
Statistics from Garmin
· 142 average HR (my max is about 200)
· 9:49hours run, 5:00 walk, 2:12 rest
· 660 exercise load
· 492m ascent (491 descent).
Overall
A great race – if my Achilles is healed up, I’ll be back next year – hopefully with the sole target of timing out on a lap and not stopping until then.
I’m happy with how I performed, originally, I was a touch bummed I “couldn’t be bothered” pushing through when I was still making laps with 7 minutes to spare… but, given how swollen my ankle is three days later I know I made the right call to stop (and probably should have done so earlier!)… and, like I said, wifey had crewed all through the night for 12 straight hours already, so it was time to go.
For next year, I think I’ll try to find some people to crew me until midnight or something, then have wifey come down for the 1am lap, instead of being there from 4pm or 5pm.
I think I need to skip my next planned A race – the Adelaide marathon - to give me Achillies time to heal properly.
Packing list (x denotes I didn’t use at least one instance of this item)
Running shirts x3 (only used the pair I wore there)
Thermal trousers (x)
Thermal top x2
Undies (x)
Thick running socks
Thin running socks (x)
Dressing gown
Soap (x)
Towels x2
Ice
Esky
Table (1.8m – absolutely necessary)
Good chair
Running vest
Running belt (x)
Soft flasks x2
400ml mt franklin (x)
750ml water bottle
Gels
Sports bars (x!)
Drink mix
Tailwind
Powerade x2
Ventolin
Atrovent (x)
Celecoxib
Portable battery
Garmin cable
Usb cables
Ugg boots
10L water box
Cramp fix
Blister bandaids
Ankle strapping for blisters
Tweezers (x)
Nail clippers (x)
Hoody (x)
Running jacket x2 (x)
Gloves x2 (x – but did put a pair into my vest and very almost wore them)
Drugs
Toothbrush and paste
Cohesive bandage (x – but in vest for emergencies)
Chewies
Headlamp
6xAAA batteries – should have brought 9, but it was fine.
Buff
Toilet paper (x, but in vest)
Tissues
Running shorts x2 (only used the pair I wore there)
Running tights x2 (only used the pair I wore there)
Rubbish bags
Headphones (x)
Phone
House keys
Superblast
RC elite v2
SC trainer
Speedgoat 5 (X)
Beanie (x)
Vegemite sandwich x2 - crustless
Peanut butter sandwich x2 – crustless
Bananas
Salomon speedcup
Sticky tape (x)
Scissors
Killer python x16
Tape for bandages (x)
Suncream (x)
Hat x2
Compression shorts x2 (only used the pair I wore there)
Small crisps x4
Vaseline (only what I put on pre-race)
Tea-towel (x)
Pens
Paper
Torch (x)
Handwash (x)
Snake bandage (x)
Floss (x)
Deodorant (x)
Explorer socks
Charger (x)
Hand sanitizer
Beach cart
Asked wife to bring after it started:
Chicken crimpys
Massage gun
Sleeping bag to be kept in car, just incase (x)
Race Day Pics
https://ibb.co/j4sKNQ0 https://ibb.co/cwvfnYr https://ibb.co/s3VxHfB
Ankle pics Saturday 630am
https://ibb.co/p492wcL https://ibb.co/CtQDC81
Ankle pics Sunday / Monday
https://ibb.co/Gkgtw2p https://ibb.co/C76GfvR https://ibb.co/C0TWPcH https://ibb.co/sJCSt9t
Garmin pics https://ibb.co/GVtmBBN https://ibb.co/yBt3zVZ

Wow, this one might me a long one.
So I moved to (undisclosed location) sometime in the beginning of last year. When I moved here I really had no friends but became heavily involved in this yoga studio I went to and slowly but surely started to make friends/acquaintances with the teacher that instructed me.
From afar she seemed super cool and I became pretty enthralled with her and her life. I would look forward so heavily to going to her classes every week and was quite intrigued by her. I thought she was funny, bubbly, spunky, cool, and always made jokes during class that made me laugh. As months went by I found myself wanting to get closer and closer to her, and she even invited me out one time to one of her “events” she was hosting. Here’s the thing;
It seemed like we had a lot in common and was just generally craving camaraderie and connection. I felt a sense of belonging with her and wanted to expand that energy in my life, and wanted to do anything I could to get closer to her for those reasons. But I guess this is where we have the first red flag;
One day after class, she extended an invitation to me to a meet up of sorts, (I’m being sparing with details just out of fear she might read this) and when she invited me it seemed like it was gonna be this big thing with lots of people invited, and just in general in talking to her it seemed as if she was very well connected and respected within her community, had lots of friends and connects, and I thought this was gonna be a huge thing that I was even lucky to be invited to. I was super stoked and exited about it.
However when the day of the event came, I was super tired and slow to getting up that morning. I figured I would just make my way over whenever I could since it seemed causal and like you could drop in whenever. I also figured there would be more than enough people that no one would really even notice my arrival or departure. (Plus, sometimes it’s chic to be fashionably late ;) ). Well…. I was most definitely wrong.
When I showed up I heard someone excitedly shout my name, which was her, and she waved me down to the “meet up”…. There was literally only one person there and it had been going on for 2+ hours. I was definitely a bit unnerved, but also didn’t want to be rude, and like I said I was just kind of happy to be there and be getting invited to things. But it was kinda like, damn…. Are these all the friends you have?
I had dressed up and looked cute but they were just kind of wearing whatever and I felt awkward and overdressed and also embarrassed now that I was even this late because it was clearly much more intimate than I expected and my arrival/absence was DEFINITELY felt. We had chatted a bit and that was cool but then I remember her confessing me that she had cried to her husband earlier that morning that she was scared nobody was going to show up and how thrilled she was that not only one, but TWO people had showed up and that it felt like she had friends. I wasn’t really sure what to say or make of that.
She also…. The whole time (and mind you, this is our first legitimate interaction out of yoga class) just kind of kept talking maniacally AT me, not to me, and was coming off almost even manic, and she had formed a white crust of spit around her mouth probably from talking so much that I couldn’t look away from. To say the least, I was a bit disturbed coming away from this interaction but I just kept telling myself that I was being too judgmental of her and to give it a chance and that maybe she was just hyper that day and that I had probably had unintentional embarrassing hygiene moments as well. So I keep going to class and that’s that.
There were several other red flag moments between this first interaction and the next one, mostly just her incredibly cringey social media presence that I genuinely almost couldn’t stand to see without feeling like I was withering away inside, but maybe I’ll save that for later. It’s almost like I couldn’t just see that the person I thought was so cool in class and the person I was seeing her be online and outside of class were the same people. But I digress.
She had actually ended up inviting me to go with her on one of her international yoga retreats, and I was actually very excited about this. I had very little time with her in between classes, and my attraction (but also repulsion) with her was growing stronger and I wanted to figure her out and see what she was really about and what the pull I was feeling towards her was about. Plus, I love travelling and just thought it would be fun.
I had a pretty good time, but we didn’t get to talk much, HOWEVER, I do remember this distinct point during the trip where it was myself, 2-3 other fiends I had made, her brother, and her “best friend” who had happened to be her brother’s Gf in a room together, talking. the brother, the best friend, and the other friend I made just all completely started talking shit about her and I was so confused.
I felt super hurt by this actually, bc I felt like I had a inexplicable bond with the teacher who had invited me, she was the reason we were all there in that beautiful place, and I just couldn’t understand why they were choosing to be so negative about someone I thought they had claimed (at least by title) to love. They would say things like “I can’t fucking stand your sister” (one of the friends I made to the brother) and everyone would just sigh and put their hands in their head and be like “I know…. I know. It’s a lot. She’s a lot”. And I didn’t have anything to add to the conversation because I was just so confused and I knew the girl would just be so upset if she heard them saying this. Anyway… that confusion stuck with me for a while after.
Fast forward maybe a month or two, I started hanging out with her more regularly myself outside of class. I would say this is when we became more “friends”. She would invite me to other teachers classes and we would talk a lot about our lives.
I learned how she felt about her close friend and family connections, and how she often felt hurt and betrayed by people close to her and how some of her friends were actually really shady. I just got a general sense of her feeling scapegoated and libeled against by ppl that got close to her and how she had walls up for that reason.
She also shared to me that most of her family was cut off, with the exception of her brother who she had recently rekindled a connection with, hence why he was on that trip. I felt very bad for her and wanted to be a source of comfort and support, and she would often comment on how she felt a sense of camaraderie with me since I also (LITERALLY) had no family and how we have to make our chosen family. This was a sweet sentiment, for sure, but I was still sussing out how I felt about her.
So one day, a mutual friend that had been on the trip with us was having a birthday party and I guess that she was invited to it, too. She sat down next to me and I was SUPER excited to see her as I was craving her energy and hadn’t seen her in some time. But then… idk. She had had a lot to drink. I’m fully aware that she’s kind of a quirky individual, and has a way of socializing which I can sometimes find a bit uncomfortable or even intense, (like the first meetup I spoke of) but this time it was even more and seemed to be heightened by the drinking.
Her husband was sitting on her other side and kept trying to interject and insinuate that maybe she was doing a bit much, but I think she was drunk enough to the point that she just found it funny and had no awareness of how she was coming off. There’s not even a way I can describe it really, but she just seemed a bit obsessive over me and kept making jokes that were literally not funny and seemed to have lost all ability to read the room. I also had noticed that she had only had TWO beers and was acting like this already which I found… really strange.
So at some point she goes to the bathroom, and I also get in line for the bathroom about 5 mins later. When I get up to the bathroom, she’s still in there, and there’s a line of about 2 or 3 people ahead of me. When she exits the bathroom she immediately spots me and rushes up to me and just starts… drunkenly spewing.
I can’t even remember what she was saying, but we were in a pretty high class establishment and I remember her gushing over me and was saying “I just want to let you know that I don’t really have friends or let people close to me in my circle but I just want to let you know that YOU are officially in my circle and you have earned friend status to me and I’ve let you in my circle…” or something like that. And I just kept thinking, who tf even says that??? I’m pretty sure the last time I checked that friendship is a two way street and it’s not just a title we bestow onto some “lucky” person and that’s that. Like girl… let ME decide if I want to be friends too first.
It was partially that, and also the way she was drunkenly spewing was so awkward and embarrassing bc I could tell all the other women in line were like who tf is this bitch and why is she saying all this weird stuff and like, does she even know you?? Lol. Just a very odd interaction which again, I kind of wrote off, but the unsettling feeling kind of just kept growing after that point.
Then, the time that I REALLY knew something was up came up about a month later, but there are still some key details of this story that are missing. Perhaps I will discuss them later.
SO. About a month later, she invited me last minute to this concert of sorts. When I got there, I was super excited to be there, the vibes were amazing and we were having so much fun. But she had definitely had a lot, A LOT to drink. I didn’t mind at first, because everyone there seemed severely under the influence, but she would just start randomly kind of lashing out at people in the crowd and she thought it was funny? She first loudly and audibly started making fun of some guys shoes in front of us, and was trying to laugh with me as if I would join in, but when his girl friend turned around and shot her a dirty look, she had the nerve to be self conscious and mad about it. She would loudly poke fun at other people in the crowd too, but not in a ha-ha way, just in a straight up mean and asshole way and I could not understand why she would even do that or why she thought that was funny.
Again, I kind of just awkwardly laughed and brushed it off. But when all was said and done and the concert was closing, she enthusiastically invited me back to go to her house and soak in her hot tub. I kept saying are you sure?? But she was like please, PLEASE come, we have weed, we’ll smoke you out and other things and I wanted to continue the vibes because it sounded fun. And then….. completely downhill.
I had arrived back at their place before she did, but as soon as I saw them go in I knocked. When I walked in, she was pale faced up on the floor, non verbal, pretty much motionless, and staring at the ceiling. I was like oh no… it seemed like she got a bit too much to drink. I waited patiently there for a few mins, unsure of what to do as I had just drove for 45 mins and I was still 25 mins in the opposite direction away from home.
I kind of just sat around, and hoped that she would sober up. I asked if she was drunk… she said no. She ran to her bathroom multiple times while her husband (a complete socially awkward case himself) tried to take care of her while she threw up. I asked her if she puked and she also said no. So I didn’t really know what to do. I was trying to offer support/ empathy but she just kept denying any claims of anything being amiss. Her husband left to pick up a pizza and I probably just should’ve left but I’m telling you I had no idea how to exit their house without making it weird or awkward. And I also was hungry. So I just stayed… and waited for the pizza.
What happened in those 20-30 mins, I don’t even know if I can fully explain. She just became… so FUCKING WEIRD. she clearly was embarrassed that I was seeing her drunk, and I think was trying to over compensate. But she just turned into an absolute freak show and I’ve never been more uncomfortable in my life.
She started hoola hooping in my face, and making these weird gremlin faces and noises at me, fell to the floor, rolled round on the floor while continuing to make the noises, convulsed on the floor, but tried to do it in a funny way, tried to make an interpretive dance for me… I’ve truly never experienced something so uncomfortable in my life. I probably do sound like an asshole, but I swear you would just have to be there to see how a) gross and b) weird and actually scary it was. I was genuinely frightened.
I’ve never seen anyone act like that and I didn’t want to make her more uncomfortable or weird by showing her how clearly uncomfortable I actually was. so I just sat there and tried to laugh. But it probably came off as more of a grimace. And for the record, this woman is 33. I am 26. It was just. Obscene.
And she’s tried to act like and say multiple times that she’s like my “big sister”. Now I’ve seen a lot of drunk behavior, but not this. I wolfed down my pizza, and so did she, and she started to get even more philosophical and weird on me, showing me songs and art which were quite frankly some of the worst things I’ve ever heard in my life, and I left as soon as I could.
I was so shaken and disturbed coming away from this, because like I said earlier, I thought she was a cool girl, but honestly her behavior and lack of control over herself completely terrified me. And it’s not like she was drinking liquor, it was just damn IPAs. And I just did not know what to do.
Some details I will try to add to this story, even though I know it’s monolithic at this point , is that 2 months prior to this she had gotten fired from the studio she worked at.
She had a mental breakdown during class because the manager was being mean to her, and he fired her on the spot. I remember being so angry with the owner, (honestly he IS a piece of shit human being) but I thought he was being sexist by calling her mentally unstable and I thought the way he handled things was unfair.
I went so far as to boycott the studio and completely remove myself from it in support of her and followed her to her new one. After the drunk #2 incident, I didn’t hang out with her very much, and only saw her during her class as I was locked into a certain number of classes I had paid for.
I remember her telling me that she had just started at ANOTHER studio, and got fired 3 days after on her birthday and she was talking about how unfair it was and how much of an asshole that new girl was for firing her… and I believed her. AGAIN.
I went so far as to block that girl on Instagram too, but deep down I kind of knew that she had probably just been fired bc let’s face it… as I was starting to discover, she WAS a lot. and the studio was in an upper class area , catered towards more upper echelon people, and I just don’t think she was fitting that image. I lent her an empathetic ear, because that’s all I would want in that situation.
But where she fucked up was sending me screenshot proof of the text exchange between her and that girl, thinking I would take her side, and later sending me screenshots of another conversation she had with the OTHER manager. She told me that this new girl fired her for bringing her husband to class. In my mind I was like, oh no, is she racist!?! Because her husband was black. But no, that’s not what I read at all.
It was the most reasonable, level headed response to someone ever, and laid out multiple offenses and reasons she didn’t want her at the studio. The reasons were honestly so embarrassing that I don’t know why she would send it to me and think I would side with her. She recently also sent me messages with the other boss and the last thing he says to her is “I hope you get help for your mental illness because whatever you have is serious and will impact all your relationships and business and things that you do”. And honestly I can now say in retrospect that those were the truest words ever spoken.
When I read these texts, I had a look back at my whole relationship with and how she would always paint everyone else to be the villain and how everyone is so mean to HER… and the whole time the common denominator was her. It was always her. And it made me rethink everything.
I’ve even had extensive conversations with some of the other people on her trip that were talking shit and couldn’t stand her and they all told me the same things. How it seemed like she was the coolest person ever and had her shit together and seemed like she was going places… but deep down she was just an absolute mess and pushed everyone away from her. And I no longer felt like I was going crazy.
But like I said, she formed a really close bond with me (I think from her perspective) and said she felt like my big sister and family, and shared all these stories about her feeling isolated and shut out by people, but now here I am, doing the exact same thing to her. Icing her out of my life. And I just wanna ask you guys…
Am the asshole?

PILOT

*Caine
*Bubble
*Gangle
*Zooble
*Kinger
*Ragatha
*Jax
*Kaufmo
*Pomni
*Gloink Queen
*Dr. Football
*Queenie
*Abstracted Orange Dog
*Abstracted Worm On A String
*Abstracted Purple Dino
*Abstracted FrownClown
*Abstracted Pink Cyclops
*Abstracted Cartoony Wizard With No Jace
*Abstracted Unibrow eyeless bird
*Abstracted Polka-Dotted Clown Thing
*Abstracted SockPuppet
*25 Gloinks
*9 Mannequins(Exclusion of Dr. Football due to having they're own name)
*4 Barrel Monkeys
*4 Fish

Candy Carrier Chaos!

*Gummigoo
*Princess Loolilalu
*Max
*Chad
*The Fudge Monster
*Gummigoo's Mother
*Additional Voices
*1 Gummy Elephant
*1000+ Candy Mannequin Townfolks(Exclusion of Additional Voices due to having his own name)
*Candy Butterfly

TheWackyWatch.Com

*Jack

POMNI WAKE UP TIME TO GO ON AN ADVENTURE

*Jeffery

Kinger With a Shotgun

*Martha Mildenhall
*Seal-like Ghost
*Tape Recorder(Only Presumably in KWAS)

Minimum Wage Labor

*Orbsman

Production Comics

*The Bone Pastor
*Pomni's Mother

Promotion

*Meatlad

Concept Art

*Butterfly Noodle
*Bald Doll
*Squidgy Baby
*Wine Demon
*Figure From Doors but he has 2 eyes
*Poorly-drawn Bert from Sesame-Streets
*Fat Demon
*Paper Thing
*SockPuppet
*Long Nosed Kaufmo-Mouthed Button-eyed Bubble
*Smug Clown

Social Media Posts

*Paine
*Rib Toast Fucker

I cannot remember the name of a duck cartoon from the 90s. Please help
I regularly reminisce about cartoons is used to watch when I was a kid. I used to watch A LOT of cartoons in the 90s, so many that I forgot the names of some (primarily the ones I only saw one or two episodes of). No duh, am I right? regardless, there is this one cartoon I that has really bothering that I can't remember what it was no matter how hard I have tried. It was about ducks. I am familiar with most of the duck cartoons from the 90s like Ducktales, Mighty Ducks cartoon, Quack Pack, etc. But there was this one that only one scene from. The scene showed an oddly colored duck (purple I think) holding some kind of artifact and it made him grow muscular and called out something like "I'm getting stronger!" in an evil sort way. I think his eyes turned red too. Then I think it cuts to him having an argument with a female duck whom was taking a bubble bath. He grabbed her rubber duck (ironic I know) and crushed it in his hand. The female duck appeared somewhat anger at him for it. That is all I remember. This was not an adult cartoon to my knowledge, as it appeared to be a kids cartoon. Its art style was similar to 90s Disney, duck cartoons, but I'm sure it was not from Disney. It may have been from Fox Kids, but that's just a guess. Also all the ducks did not seem to be wearing clothes, which was common for cartoons such as these. I cannot remember what cartoon it was and I would really like to know. I do a lot of research on cartoons and this one seemed quite interesting. If anyone has any clues as to what it is, I would greatly appreciate it.

Synopsis:
An engineer in another world—blending science and magic to achieve greatness in a world where skills and levels reign supreme.
—
Ethan was just a plain old engineer, but everything changed when he was reborn into a world of skills, levels, and magic. With his advanced knowledge far ahead of the time period he finds himself in, this new reincarnated life will be much different than his last, especially because he can construct, deconstruct, and reconstruct runes—something no one else can do.
But with royal politics, looming tax collectors, a mountain of debt, dungeon incursions, cults, and hostile fantasy races mixing together into a cocktail of bullshit that threatens to bury his dreams; Ethan must bridge the gap between steel and sorcery to grow stronger.
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Chapter 02

-1-
Roland cursed under his breath as he trudged down the muddy path toward Lord Theodore's manor. The late early morning sun cast long shadows, painting the desolate landscape in an even bleaker light.
Why was it only him who had to deal with Lord Theodore's bullshit? Just last night, Roland had to take care of all the complaints from the bar he'd found Lord Theodore at. Not to mention, he had to pay compensation to the wenches from his own personal funds.
And that wasn't even half the things he'd done yesterday alone.
After all, Lord Theodore was either busy abusing his power and bullying the people of the town, gambling, drinking, getting wasted with his face stuck up a prostitute, or doing his fourth favorite activity which, naturally, was a combination of the latter three. The man wasn't the brightest, but he wasn't quite dumb enough to avoid dealing with the problems the town of Holden faced.
Roland shook his head when he made it to the estate gates. As expected, there were guards, servants, and soldiers dashing left and right, but he was ignored. It was time to beg Lord Theodore to attend to his duties. None dared stop him, for he was a [Knight] appointed to Lord Theodore by his father—Lord Alexander Lockheart—and an acting advisor while said lord was being, well, his usual idiotic and selfish self.
So, Roland did what he had to; he moved past them all, and made for Lord Theodore's sleeping quarters where a handful of maids were all fussing about like hens with their heads chopped off.
Lord Theodore's quarters were not large by noble standards, but impressive all the same. Lavish and gaudy, just as he expected. Tapestries and drapes were hung up high all about the walls, and on the ground, there were expensive fur carpets.
After moving past the maids and butlers who were currently shuffling about like a horde of ants whose nest was threatened by a boar, he stopped before a silk drape that barred the way to Lord Theodore's bedchambers.
"Lord Theodore," he called.
Silence.
"Lord Theodore?"
Nothing.
Feeling a little annoyed, Roland frowned. "Lord Theodore," he called again. "With all due respect, are you presently attired?"
Nothing but a muffled sound came from the other side. Roland grimaced, and looked up at the ceiling in exasperation before dropping his hand and tugging the curtain aside. The inside of the bedchamber wasn't much to look at. Just your average nobleman's bedroom with a canopy bed big enough to fit twelve women side-by-side.
Most did, in fact, do just that.
A bookshelf stood on each wall, and at the far end was another drape that led to an enclosed balcony where he had the gall to throw his used clothes through during summer.
"Greetings, my lord," Roland said.
Lord Theodore, however, didn't answer.
He sat in front of a full-length mirror on the dresser. He had this listless sort of look, like he just didn't know how to deal with things. It wasn't an expression he'd ever seen on the man's face.
"Lord Theodore, are you well?" Roland inquired, a sliver of unease creeping into his voice. Though he found the young lord childish—given he was barely eighteen years old—Lord Theodore was his responsibility. He'd been Roland's responsibility when he was a little brat, and even now.
Theodore gave a startled response. "Ah, Roland? Yes, I am quite well."
"My lord, with all due respect, I implore you to be truthful. Has something transpired?"
Roland was anxious now. While he harbored no particular fondness for Lord Theodore, a sworn oath bound him to protect and care for the Baron. Granted, his master, Lord Theodore's own father, had afforded him considerable autonomy within Holden's borders—heck, he could even go as far as beating up Lord Theodore without consequences, if Roland deemed it reasonable and necessary—but his code of honor held oaths sacred. The son of the house Varian would rather lose an arm and his birthright than break a single [Oath] made.
"No, truly, I'm fine."
"If that is the case," Roland acknowledged with a curt nod, "then I bear news."
Lord Theodore furrowed his brow. "Good news, I trust?"
"I'm afraid not," Roland sighed. "Yesterday, our patrol in the Deadwoods encountered a band of brigands...…"
Lord Theodore's frown deepened. "While banditry is a common occurrence, it often heralds further troubles. Elaborate, Roland."
"Indeed, my lord," Roland continued, "these brigands weren't merely causing a ruckus. Apparently, they were engaged in combat with a rather formidable creature, vaguely humanoid in form."
Lord Theodore's posture stiffened. "Vaguely humanoid? Can you provide further details?"
Roland shook his head. "Limited information, I'm afraid. Only reports of unnatural speed reached our ears; it appeared to be engaged with wolves. Both fled upon human-contact, however."
Lord Theodore stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Did our men prevail against the brigands? And this creature—surely Captain..." he paused, searching for the man's name.
"Thomas," Roland supplied.
"Ah, yes, Thomas. Holden is geographically close to the Deadwoods. Sir Thomas wouldn't simply abandon such a threat near the bordertowns, would he? He and I may not see eye to eye on certain matters, but... surely he wouldn't leave such a threat unaddressed." Lord Theodore said.
Roland hesitated. "Captain Thomas chose to bypass us and directly inform the Crown of their discovery. He remained tight-lipped regarding specifics despite repeated inquiries."
Lord Theodore hummed thoughtfully. "If Thomas deems it worthy of the Crown's attention, then it surpasses our jurisdiction. Let's hope for their swift and decisive action. What of the brigands? Eliminated, I presume?"
"So it seems," Roland replied. "All but one met their demise. The sole survivor remains in a cell, though maddened beyond reason."
"I see. Is that for now?" Lord Theodore leaned back in his chair.
"Not quite, my lord. We've had a recent outbreak of the Blight, and we suspect it was an intentional spread. Unfortunately, the culprit remains unidentified."
Theodore's expression morphed into one of genuine shock. "Are these two seemingly unrelated issues connected, perhaps?" He asked.
"It appears to be the case, my lord." A sigh escaped Roland's lips. The Blight—a magical sickness that eats away at your life force, causes lethargy, nausea, and kills you, all while your body radiates a pervasive foul odor. It had recently taken hold on a few people of Holden. Why or how, Roland did not know.
"Those afflicted have been quarantined in a secure location far from Holden to prevent further contagion. Our physicians are doing their utmost to manage them. However, several have died already, and the remaining victims exhibit signs of feral behavior—meaning, they have already entered the late stage, I'm afraid. It's become imperative that they remain under quarantine, lest they either bite other humans—given there's hunger for raw flesh in the late stage—or they could infect the crops, causing them to decay. Consequently, the farmers, understandably anxious, have retreated into their homes."
They were likely waiting for their lord, incompetent as he may be, to deal with the situation. Yet, he had his hand up a wench's skirt more than actually trying to fix the issues... What can I do with him? Roland sighed.
Lord Theodore rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Roland."
"Yes, my lord?"
"Do you think the Merchant Guild would let me have another loan?"
Roland's lips thinned into a line, but he shook his head. "Regrettably, my lord, they would not. The Merchants' Guild has been cautious lately. There was this whole unpleasant affair with a prominent [Merchant Lord] named Bertram, you might know the name. Used to flaunt more gold jewelry than some of the highborn nobles. Turns out, he was embezzling.
"Apparently, he manipulated the Guild's books for months. Inflated trade contracts with nonexistent suppliers from faraway lands, siphoned off the extra profit into his own pockets. Clever, gotta give him that. Even forged shipping manifests to keep it all looking legit.
"Nasty business, that. Apparently, the esteemed Lord Bertram decided a little vacation was in order after everything, and wouldn't you know it, he packed a rather hefty sum from the Guild's coffers along for the ride as well. We're talking a near royal-wedding-sized dowry here, my lord. Vanished, all of it.
"The details are still murky, but rumor has it Bertram might have gotten tangled with pirates operating from the Broken Isles. One of the [Pirate Kings], perhaps—or most likely. So, the Merchants' Guild has been refraining from giving out loans. And, my apologies to say this, my lord, but you're a high-risk individual, and you already have quite the debt with them... They wouldn't want to give more."
Lord Theodore already had a mountain of debt on his name... The interest rate was more than what Lord Theodore could pay off even if the crops did better than planned. Given that the Adventurers' Guild of this sector had been rather short on manpower lately due to a dungeon incursion in the town, Corinth, lying beside theirs and given that Lord Theodore had a tendency for tax evasion and then laundering… Yeah, they were royally fucked. Even if in this situation, Lord Theodore wanted a loan for himself... Roland just gave up. Maybe it was time to return to his master, Lord Theodore's father, and just ask him to appoint him somewhere else—he couldn't deal with this scumbag anymore, not in his current state.
"I see, they wouldn't. Not surprising. It seems I'm going to have to hire a [Necromancer] by my lonesome."
Roland blinked. "That's..." a shock, Roland stopped himself from saying. [Necromancers] cost a hefty sum, and given that Lord Theodore was already under debt and likely the financial situation of Holden was anything but optimal, hiring a [Necromancer] would've put a huge dent in Holden's already meager reserves. However, Roland hadn't imagined, not in his wildest dreams, that Lord Theodore would be employing one by his lonesome.
Throughout his life, Roland had known this man to not even spare a thought to anything that wasn't his immediate self-gratification, or his amusement and satisfaction. How was the wastrel noble suddenly going to change?
"My lord, my apologies for asking, but why do you require a [Necromancer's] assistance?" Roland finally asked, schooling his shocked expression.
"Oh, I have some... theories regarding the Blight." Lord Theodore grinned. "And a [Necromancer] might just be someone who we need in order to solve this problem once and for all."
Roland was shocked to his core, once more. "But, my lord, the treatment for the Blight isn't something common folk can afford? So, how...?"
"Nonsense, Roland. Forget that rudimentary concoction they peddle as a cure. I envision a more... permanent solution. Issue a commission at the Adventurers' Guild—a [Necromancer] or perhaps a [Witch], their talents are equally suited for this task."
"Yes, my lord." Roland bowed, failing to comprehend what Lord Theodore was planning on doing.
-2-
When Roland left, Ethan found it easier to relax. The stiff, aristocratic manners these people employed were rather annoying to bear with. No, they were rather hard to imitate, more accurately. Because despite his efforts, he'd still found it hard to match their ways, but it was doable. Not good enough, yet, but doable.
"How should I, going forward, act, then?" he muttered. "Because if I've understood a single thing, it is this: Theo's character as I know it now will ruin any chance of me, well, earning anything, be that respect, wealth, power, or all three. Should I continue as him, then, or completely overhaul Theodore's character and pretend it's some epiphany? A spiritual enlightenment, perhaps?"
Ethan shook his head. Whatever it may be, he wasn't planning on being like Theo. Let's go with a gradual change in mannerism.
First, however, he needed to deal with the Blight issue. Which would be easily dealt with—all he had to do was pay the [Necromancer], or [Witch], from his own pouch. Then, he needed to figure out this town's financial status and everything else in order to organize a working infrastructure and create new financial opportunities. Afterwards, he could move onto his 'character', if that is indeed what his situation required. There's a lot to do.
Before everything, however, a bath.
After all, he reeked of sweat and alcohol, among other not-so pleasant scents.
...
It took no more than a few minutes for a handful of servants to prepare the bath. Hot water steamed inside the spacious tub as soap bubbles glistened—soap that was far too expensive for the common folk. Despite being a luxury, its quality was arguably trash. Regardless, this was all the people had in this world. A strong scent of lavender permeated the air and tickled his nose as he undressed. A few maids had prepared for his comfort and placed a silken bathrobe alongside a set of towels on a small table near the bathtub before he'd dismissed them, ordering them to inform the kitchen staff that he would like his meal soon.
Ethan relaxed his shoulders, took the robe with one hand, and tossed it carelessly nearby. It was fine silk. Ethan shook his head before proceeding with an easy grace into the water. It was hot. Yet, Ethan felt rather cold, despite the heat. It helped him relax, and with it, the stiff persona that was Lord Theodore faded.
Ethan sank deeper, letting his long blond locks loose. A quick thought made him bring his hand forward. What if... he could make a fire? Just a little one, like a candle flame. How cool would that be? He focused, willing a tiny spark to appear on his fingertip. Nothing. Just a sputter and a fizzle.
"Hmm," he mumbled, undeterred. "Maybe I need to practice."
He doubted it was just understanding. After all, the skill [Elemental Spells] had given him the barest hints of the basics of how to create a basic spark of flame. He lacked control over mana. [Magic Perception] allowed him to view his mana—flowing, fast-moving streams and spiraling, coiling vortexes. It was chaotic; it was a mess! Maybe if he calmed it down, he could actually make something happen?
Easier said than done, he quickly learned. When he moved it, it took no less effort than bending metal with brute force. The feeling was there, and the will, too. Just the act of 'moving' it alone was a herculean effort. It seemed nigh impossible.
Maybe I'm doing it wrong?
Humming, Ethan looked through the snippets of memories he'd gotten from Theodore. The memories, he found, weren't entirely useless; as his mind drifted back and forth from those flashes, he did remember something Theodore had seen last night... There! A memory from last night—a drunk mage at the bar, showing off with a fireball for some girl who didn't seem too impressed.
"Let's see how that trick works," Ethan grinned.
With [Magic Perception], he saw how the spell flowed. The "spell" was, in a way, forced outwards into reality through the use of symbols he quickly recognized as runes—at least that was what he assumed after seeing the fireball.
Ethan could easily recall the shape of the rune that'd appeared before the fire took form on top of the mage's hand.
I'm pretty sure it's not possible to view runes. I assume, at least, from what little fragments of memories I got from Theo. Anyway, let's move my mana in the shape, then.
He imagined the shape on top of his hand and willed the mana to pour into it. Soon, rune motes started forming out of thin air, ripping into reality. Forming into a shape he willed, a rune burned brightly and loudly atop his palm. As he drew his hand forward, flames burst into life, flickering before fizzling out.
[Basic Magic Script] — Lvl 1 -> Lvl 2!
Congratulations! You have gained skill: [Basic Rune Creation]!
"Whoa." Ethan stared at his hand, a wide grin splitting his face. So that's how it works! Runes, huh? That's awesome! Ethan felt like a child again. He couldn't wait to try again, this time with a smaller flame, as it appeared that a fireball was far too much for his lacking skill and control. Magic... it was epic stuff!
Before that, however, he looked at the new skill he'd gained.
~Basic Rune Creation – Level 1~
Type: Active
Effect: You have grasped the fundamental concept of using runes to channel and shape your mana for basic magical effects. The Connection between two of your skill—[Magic Perception] and [Basic Magic Script]—has resulted in the creation of a new skill. You can now create simple runes that allow for the manipulation of elemental energy on a small scale. As your skill level increases, you will be able to create more complex runes, allowing for more powerful and versatile spells. You may also learn to combine runes for even greater magical effects.
Ethan stared. Reading the description was a quick matter of concentration. It took him by surprise, however, when he realized it. Rune creation? Huh. Does that mean I can create anything? The thought alone was exciting. What about rune motes? Rune motes were fragments of runes, combining certain fragments could result in a full rune. I saw them congregating into the shape of a rune, but is it possible to just create rune motes and not a full rune? I should try.
Regardless of his thoughts, it was creation—
—and Ethan loved creation. Even as a child, he had never gotten tired of tinkering with things. He still recalled the time he'd gotten his first Lego set. Just putting random pieces together with no thought for a bigger picture—he'd loved that. He'd loved doing all sorts of stuff with Legos, creating different castles or other complex structures, but it was building something completely random and ridiculous, yet unique nonetheless, which gave him the most sense of satisfaction. It was fun. It was a hobby—a hobby that ignited in him a fire of passion for innovation.
It was then the thought of being a civil engineer had sprung up in his mind. To put it simply, a civil engineer is responsible for planning, designing, and constructing buildings. Though, that was just a general term. Ethan would have been perfectly happy had he chosen that. Unfortunately, his father had wanted him to become a boxer, instead.
The man wanted to become one himself in his prime, but due to health issues, he'd quit right before making it to a big league. He'd hoped his son would achieve what he couldn't and bring victory for the family. Even though Ethan hadn't exactly planned boxing as his future, but who could refuse the pressure his old man put on him? Especially when he'd been just a little boy?
It was another matter entirely that Ethan fell in love with boxing, too, as it made him feel alive. The sensation of a punching bag slamming against his fists? Nothing quite made his blood boil like that.
And oh, fighting in the ring. There was just something about the sport Ethan couldn't resist.
Something about creation, fighting, and experiencing a bit of both, had Ethan wishing he could try the other options that lay in front of him now.
Could he make a real spaceship, in this world?
It sounded silly as fuck and he knew it. Nonetheless, the temptation was still there, hovering and nagging at the edge of his mind, as ridiculous as his previous thoughts might have been.
Spaceships are cool, dammit.
That thought suddenly gave Ethan pause. "Let's just return to practice."
This time, fire flickered atop his fingertips for a second longer.
Another second was added on top of that after his third try.
The light was dim. However, it did mean something: improvement.
[Elemental Spells] — Lvl 1 -> Lvl 2!
Grinning like an idiot, Ethan sank deeper into the hot bath water and brought his other hand up to repeat the exercise for the next half an hour or so, occasionally reading a notification that would come every now and then.
[Elemental Spells] — Lvl 2 -> Lvl 3!
[Elemental Spells] — Lvl 3 -> Lvl 4!
[Elemental Spells] — Lvl 4 -> Lvl 5!
But no matter what, he couldn't get it to level up to level 6, nor could he level up [Basic Magic Script] from level 2 to 3.
Why not, though? I'm doing—
"Don't rush," he chided himself. "Your control is pitiful, shaping is trash, and your spellcasting is akin to tossing stones into the sea without even knowing how to make it bounce—guesswork is all you are, but it's a good start, I suppose."
As he set a handful of candle-like flames afloat on all five of his fingers, his lips quirked into a wide smirk. It was only a party trick. For now, that is. I need to find more about magic and learn. I've been winging it.
That was true; he didn't understand anything about magic. All he'd done so far was try to emulate the rune he'd seen in the memory snippet through the help of [Magic Perception] and cast a few party tricks. Was that impressive? He had literally no comparison to base off of, thus why he knew he needed to learn more.
Theodore's memories proved to be useless in this regard, too. His father hadn't found him worthy enough to be assigned a mage as a tutor. Theodore was a disappointment through and through, and that's why he'd been sent to rule the bordertowns.
He could cast the spell, yes, but he didn't understand the underlying concepts that fueled the magic or what the process was.
-3-
Ethan descended down the stairs that would lead him to the dining room where breakfast had already been laid out for him. Two maids were present as well. It was a feast of the likes he'd only ever read in fairy tales. Fried, scrambled, boiled eggs. Different shapes, sizes, and cuts. Cakes and pies in varying quantities and sizes. Grilled meat, smoked and salted. How could he ever eat everything alone?
Ethan exhaled and then dove in; however, he still maintained decorum as it was imperative to do so given that he was a noble now. Regardless, once done, he made it to the meeting room given that he had some people to meet today.
"Barely breaking even," Ethan muttered, flicking the parchment in his hand. He frowned at the financial situation of Holden, the town he was in charge of. The bordertowns consisted of a series of towns lying on the periphery of the borders. Each town was a barony in name, and nobles—especially troublesome nobles—were often sent here to practice ruling and to make them accustomed to how the common folk lived, so they could empathize with the people they ruled.
With how many bandits the region had had lately, the Blight, debt, tax, and interest that'd ramped up, Ethan's current situation was mind-fucking at best and a keg waiting to explode at worst.
I don't want to deal with Theo's issues.
Not only was this whole situation something Ethan did not want in the slightest, a whole can of worms that were Theo's problems was thrust into his hands. Ethan had held no fantasies of getting isekai'd. That was suicide in his books. He'd have been more than happy to die and meet oblivion. But now that he was here…
Leaning back into his chair, Ethan rubbed his eyes. Yeah, he needed to deal with everything and make the best of his situation to live a comfortable life. When Roland returned with a man in tow, Ethan hummed.
The man was young, younger than Roland, even. Black hair and sharp green eyes. He held himself high with confidence and Ethan recognized him instantly. Isn't he that mage from the bar?
"My lord," Roland bowed. "I have brought a [Necromancer] as per your command."
The [Necromancer] bowed and with a thin smile said, "Pleased to be at your service, my lord. The name's Jack."
Hm. So he wasn't a mage but a [Necromancer].
"Likewise," Ethan replied with a nod, then leaned forward, smiling. "Say, Jack, would you like to be part of a business opportunity?
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Here's a link to where I originally posted this.
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/Xda-un-ppNA
Edit: Take this with like, 27 and a half grains of salt. I'm a Titan main, so lore nerds please don't put a pipe bomb in my mailbox if I get something wrong.
Edit 2: Reworked my theories on Strife (and changed its name to Strain), and Arc.
Edit 3: Reworked/added to Strand. Posted on Reddit for further review by the Destiny lore and theorycrafting community (AKA the Warlocks).
Edit 4: Reworked some structuring in the post itself. Added more/a better TL;DR section. Thought about removing this section because it's getting big.
TL;DR for subclass talk:
Maybe the subclasses are all different parts of physics guys.
Solar: Fusion (just look at the sun; it happens in the sun at ALL times)/heat
Arc: Motion/spacetime/time dilation/ movement of energy itself/"ARC-celeration"c(hehehe)/energy transfer
Void: zero point energy/gravity
Stasis: Absolute zero/stillness/fission (shattering?)
Strand: String theory (probably not)/(what I think it better represents) quantum enTANGLEment/choice
Strain/strife (possible names): entropy/no energy transfeimmovable objects, unstoppable forces, infinite masses and density etc.
Prismatic: theory of everything/unifying quantum theory (darkness) with general relativity (light?)
TL;DR for Strife/Strain supers:
TITANS: For their super they get a force field around them that absorbs damage and then explodes. The explosion stuns all 3 kinds of champions and only happens if damage is taken when shielding. Get half of super back if they take no damage.
WARLOCKS: For the Warlock super you cast a field around you that catches all projectiles shot at you and throws them back at the enemy that shot them. Basically just say "no u" to damage.
HUNTERS: You dead-on sprint through anything in your way. Doubles sprint speed at T3 mobility, but triples at T10. Downside: you can't stop running. Upside: anything you run into just sort of stops existing.
Okay, okay, I'm just going to ramble now. Take note that some terms/concepts here will feel weird and out-of-context without knowledge in these specific subjects.
Let's take a look at Void and Strand: Void could be gravity, a sort of connection that gets stronger as two objects get closer. Strand could be entanglement, a connection that forms a bond between two objects that works (spookily?) at a distance. They are both connections. Also with darkness being based around knowledge, if we look at only one of two entangled particles and it is spinning up then we can know without looking at the other particle that it is spinning down. Look at the Strand Clones; they are copies of the hunter that created them that have been entangled by the hunter. When they dodge, they create an unstable version of themselves that will explode when an enemy comes near it, or just unravel peacefully after a certain amount of time. Strand is often associated with sewing, weaving, and fabrics. Throughout other pop-culture what is also described as being sewn, weaved, or (more commonly) made of fabric? That’s right; space time. I think that strand has something to do with other timelines; other threads of existence. Perhaps the hunter pulls a specter from some other timeline to use as a weapon. (I mean what haven’t Guardians turned into weapons at this point). Maybe when Warlocks weavewalk, they enter another timeline identical to ours with a tether being cast between the two to keep them connected (if you don’t like that make up your own reason for why they stay partially visible in our world).
Alright now let's look at the easiest of the three groupings to talk about: Solar and Stasis. Solar is heat/fusion. Fusion happens in the sun and so it makes sense that solar is a subclass focusing on heat. Look at the buff "Radiant." It doesn't exactly have anything about it pertaining to fire, but I would certainly describe the sun as "Radiant." (this one's iffy but I thought I'd include it anyways). Now look at Stasis. I think that it HEAVILY relates to fission, which is (sort of but not really) the opposite of fusion. Let's look at the stasis debuff, "Slowed." This effect is the opposite of Solar's "Scorched" effect. At 100 stacks of Scorched, a target will ignite. Stars go through this same process at their birth, they slowly gather more and more mass, more and more heat, until eventually fusion happens, the star... ignites. At 100 stacks of "Slowed," however, the target freezes. Then, when damaged the target shatters, like in fission when we break atoms apart and release the energy. The target even shows this release of energy in Destiny because they glow bright then take damage. With fusion being the stronger of the two, it is certainly interesting that this season, Season of the Wish, the season before they drop the "theory of everything," Prismatic, Solar (fusion) is stronger than Stasis (fission). They might just (probably not) deliver this slap across the face in the Lightfall/Season of the Wish finale. Also on the less deep and more obvious side of things, they are both just fire and ice, I mean come on… that’s just cliche 101.
Okay moving on to Arc and Strain (my name for the 3rd Darkness subclass). This one is a bit more difficult. Arc is manifested as lightning. It's described as pertaining to motion and speed. It is "Arc-celeration." Time dilation happens when moving rapidly through space. Because space and time are the same force, the faster you move through space, the slower you move through time. This is very unintuitive, but the slower you move through time, the faster everything else moves through time (from your perspective). If you send a spaceship to the closest solar system (which is about 4 light years away) at the speed of light you will reach it in four years. Well, not really, there's also space dilation. Basically the faster you go towards something the smaller the distance between you and it. That's why a theoretical trip to another solar system at high speeds would have you decelerate after you reach the halfway point, so that you don't get farther from your destination. Satisfied sigh Oh, the complications of relativity, aren't they wonderful! Anyways back to what I was talking about: Arc transfers energy into motion and motion into energy. Thundercrash launches the Titan at high speeds until they hit something, releasing the energy as lightning, damaging the enemy. The Hunters' Arc staff deflects things by transferring their speed into energy and that energy into speed in a different direction. Warlocks use Chaos Reach to conjure stored energy and rapidly accelerate it in a beam of damaging energy. Titans' Fists of Havoc slam to the ground converting their falling momentum into damage like Thundercrash, and when they use their shoulder charge, they punch an enemy, changing their momentum into energy, and transfering that energy into a punch. Arc is energy transferal. Strain might be the opposite of energy transferal. Immovable objects, unstoppable forces, permanent momentum.
Ok ok ok... hear me out (also take these with 27 and a half grains of salt. I'm a Titan and brutality is a part of my culture.):
TITANS: For their super they get a force field tightly hugging their bodies for a short amount of time. The amount of damage they would have taken builds up and as they release this energy, they blast out in an explosion of damage that is completely unstoppable by any form of enemy with any kind of shield (it also stuns all champions). I'm talking Bubble popping power. If they take no damage, they get half of their super energy left and no explosion is caused. I call the Titans' super: UNBREAKABLE WILL
WARLOCKS: For the Warlock super you ground yourself completely and extend this unbreakable field of influence beyond allowing you to move (floating above the ground as always). ANY projectile or attack thrown at you is caught in this field and stopped until the super ends, when you unleash all of these projectiles back at the sender (if they aren't already dead). Melee attacks bounce back and damage whoever just hit you. I'm talking CATCHES Thundercrashes and turns that Titan towards any of their allies and LAUNCHES them. You are THE uno reverse card. I call the Warlocks' super: UNENDING VOLLEY
HUNTERS: You guys are the most mobile of the three classes, thus I have given you a roaming, movement-based super. You dead-on sprint through all that stands in your way. Doubles sprint speed at T3 mobility, but triples at T10 with all speeds between. Downside: you can't stop running. Upside: anything you run into just sort of stops existing. You are a living, breathing, and (most importantly) running .50 cal BMG round. Anything you can't kill in one hit you just run through allowing for another drive-by (through?) to be made. I call the Hunter's super: UNSTOPPABLE SPRINT

Now looking at Prismatic:
Prismatic is the sum of it all, it's the way that general relativity and quantum theory will eventually click into the perfect, symmetrical, equation. "The theory of everything," and "The Final Shape," kinda sound similar too. Just saying. ¯\_(-_-)_/¯
I don't have a lot on Prismatic.
All right, that's it. That's all I'll say. I could keep going. I could talk about Blink working on both Void and Arc (which I will a little anyways >:D) Void works 'cause of the physics behind hawking radiation and arc working because of what happens at "absolute fast" which is similar to absolute hot but instead the motion is given direction and not just molecules bouncing around really fast. Absolute hot is the opposite of absolute zero by the way for those that don't know. I could talk about my theory on resonance. But I won't, because this comment is already WAY TOO LONG and talking about anything more is going to make my brain start holding my heart ransom, threatening a heart attack.
That took an hour and a half to type... :/
And another half hour to edit. -_-
And another to do it again. T-T

Here's a link to where I originally posted this.
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/Xda-un-ppNA
Edit: Take this with like, 27 and a half grains of salt. I'm a Titan main, so lore nerds please don't put a pipe bomb in my mailbox if I get something wrong.
Edit 2: Reworked my theories on Strife (and changed its name to Strain), and Arc.
Edit 3: Reworked/added to Strand. Posted on Reddit for further review by the Destiny lore and theorycrafting community (AKA the Warlocks).
Edit 4: Reworked some structuring in the post itself. Added more/a better TL;DR section. Thought about removing this section because it's getting big.
TL;DR for subclass talk:
Maybe the subclasses are all different parts of physics guys.
Solar: Fusion (just look at the sun; it happens in the sun at ALL times)/heat
Arc: Motion/spacetime/time dilation/ movement of energy itself/"ARC-celeration"c(hehehe)/energy transfer
Void: zero point energy/gravity
Stasis: Absolute zero/stillness/fission (shattering?)
Strand: String theory (probably not)/(what I think it better represents) quantum enTANGLEment/choice
Strain/strife (possible names): entropy/no energy transfeimmovable objects, unstoppable forces, infinite masses and density etc.
Prismatic: theory of everything/unifying quantum theory (darkness) with general relativity (light?)
TL;DR for Strife/Strain supers:
TITANS: For their super they get a force field around them that absorbs damage and then explodes. The explosion stuns all 3 kinds of champions and only happens if damage is taken when shielding. Get half of super back if they take no damage.
WARLOCKS: For the Warlock super you cast a field around you that catches all projectiles shot at you and throws them back at the enemy that shot them. Basically just say "no u" to damage.
HUNTERS: You dead-on sprint through anything in your way. Doubles sprint speed at T3 mobility, but triples at T10. Downside: you can't stop running. Upside: anything you run into just sort of stops existing.
Okay, okay, I'm just going to ramble now. Take note that some terms/concepts here will feel weird and out-of-context without knowledge in these specific subjects.
Let's take a look at Void and Strand: Void could be gravity, a sort of connection that gets stronger as two objects get closer. Strand could be entanglement, a connection that forms a bond between two objects that works (spookily?) at a distance. They are both connections. Also with darkness being based around knowledge, if we look at only one of two entangled particles and it is spinning up then we can know without looking at the other particle that it is spinning down. Look at the Strand Clones; they are copies of the hunter that created them that have been entangled by the hunter. When they dodge, they create an unstable version of themselves that will explode when an enemy comes near it, or just unravel peacefully after a certain amount of time. Strand is often associated with sewing, weaving, and fabrics. Throughout other pop-culture what is also described as being sewn, weaved, or (more commonly) made of fabric? That’s right; space time. I think that strand has something to do with other timelines; other threads of existence. Perhaps the hunter pulls a specter from some other timeline to use as a weapon. (I mean what haven’t Guardians turned into weapons at this point). Maybe when Warlocks weavewalk, they enter another timeline identical to ours with a tether being cast between the two to keep them connected (if you don’t like that make up your own reason for why they stay partially visible in our world).
Alright now let's look at the easiest of the three groupings to talk about: Solar and Stasis. Solar is heat/fusion. Fusion happens in the sun and so it makes sense that solar is a subclass focusing on heat. Look at the buff "Radiant." It doesn't exactly have anything about it pertaining to fire, but I would certainly describe the sun as "Radiant." (this one's iffy but I thought I'd include it anyways). Now look at Stasis. I think that it HEAVILY relates to fission, which is (sort of but not really) the opposite of fusion. Let's look at the stasis debuff, "Slowed." This effect is the opposite of Solar's "Scorched" effect. At 100 stacks of Scorched, a target will ignite. Stars go through this same process at their birth, they slowly gather more and more mass, more and more heat, until eventually fusion happens, the star... ignites. At 100 stacks of "Slowed," however, the target freezes. Then, when damaged the target shatters, like in fission when we break atoms apart and release the energy. The target even shows this release of energy in Destiny because they glow bright then take damage. With fusion being the stronger of the two, it is certainly interesting that this season, Season of the Wish, the season before they drop the "theory of everything," Prismatic, Solar (fusion) is stronger than Stasis (fission). They might just (probably not) deliver this slap across the face in the Lightfall/Season of the Wish finale. Also on the less deep and more obvious side of things, they are both just fire and ice, I mean come on… that’s just cliche 101.
Okay moving on to Arc and Strain (my name for the 3rd Darkness subclass). This one is a bit more difficult. Arc is manifested as lightning. It's described as pertaining to motion and speed. It is "Arc-celeration." Time dilation happens when moving rapidly through space. Because space and time are the same force, the faster you move through space, the slower you move through time. This is very unintuitive, but the slower you move through time, the faster everything else moves through time (from your perspective). If you send a spaceship to the closest solar system (which is about 4 light years away) at the speed of light you will reach it in four years. Well, not really, there's also space dilation. Basically the faster you go towards something the smaller the distance between you and it. That's why a theoretical trip to another solar system at high speeds would have you decelerate after you reach the halfway point, so that you don't get farther from your destination. Satisfied sigh Oh, the complications of relativity, aren't they wonderful! Anyways back to what I was talking about: Arc transfers energy into motion and motion into energy. Thundercrash launches the Titan at high speeds until they hit something, releasing the energy as lightning, damaging the enemy. The Hunters' Arc staff deflects things by transferring their speed into energy and that energy into speed in a different direction. Warlocks use Chaos Reach to conjure stored energy and rapidly accelerate it in a beam of damaging energy. Titans' Fists of Havoc slam to the ground converting their falling momentum into damage like Thundercrash, and when they use their shoulder charge, they punch an enemy, changing their momentum into energy, and transfering that energy into a punch. Arc is energy transferal. Strain might be the opposite of energy transferal. Immovable objects, unstoppable forces, permanent momentum.
Ok ok ok... hear me out (also take these with 27 and a half grains of salt. I'm a Titan and brutality is a part of my culture.):
TITANS: For their super they get a force field tightly hugging their bodies for a short amount of time. The amount of damage they would have taken builds up and as they release this energy, they blast out in an explosion of damage that is completely unstoppable by any form of enemy with any kind of shield (it also stuns all champions). I'm talking Bubble popping power. If they take no damage, they get half of their super energy left and no explosion is caused. I call the Titans' super: UNBREAKABLE WILL
WARLOCKS: For the Warlock super you ground yourself completely and extend this unbreakable field of influence beyond allowing you to move (floating above the ground as always). ANY projectile or attack thrown at you is caught in this field and stopped until the super ends, when you unleash all of these projectiles back at the sender (if they aren't already dead). Melee attacks bounce back and damage whoever just hit you. I'm talking CATCHES Thundercrashes and turns that Titan towards any of their allies and LAUNCHES them. You are THE uno reverse card. I call the Warlocks' super: UNENDING VOLLEY
HUNTERS: You guys are the most mobile of the three classes, thus I have given you a roaming, movement-based super. You dead-on sprint through all that stands in your way. Doubles sprint speed at T3 mobility, but triples at T10 with all speeds between. Downside: you can't stop running. Upside: anything you run into just sort of stops existing. You are a living, breathing, and (most importantly) running .50 cal BMG round. Anything you can't kill in one hit you just run through allowing for another drive-by (through?) to be made. I call the Hunter's super: UNSTOPPABLE SPRINT

Now looking at Prismatic:
Prismatic is the sum of it all, it's the way that general relativity and quantum theory will eventually click into the perfect, symmetrical, equation. "The theory of everything," and "The Final Shape," kinda sound similar too. Just saying. ¯\_(-_-)_/¯
I don't have a lot on Prismatic.
All right, that's it. That's all I'll say. I could keep going. I could talk about Blink working on both Void and Arc (which I will a little anyways >:D) Void works 'cause of the physics behind hawking radiation and arc working because of what happens at "absolute fast" which is similar to absolute hot but instead the motion is given direction and not just molecules bouncing around really fast. Absolute hot is the opposite of absolute zero by the way for those that don't know. I could talk about my theory on resonance. But I won't, because this comment is already WAY TOO LONG and talking about anything more is going to make my brain start holding my heart ransom, threatening a heart attack.
That took an hour and a half to type... :/
And another half hour to edit. -_-
And another to do it again. T-T

Quirk: Helpin n Hurtin Words
Possible hero Name: Smack Talk
Villain Name: Trash Talk
Type: Emitter
Description: This Quirk allows them to manifest a speech bubble from their mouth. The effects of this quirk depends upon whether what the user says towards another person is either a compliment or insult, positive or negative. Furthermore the user can verbally fill the speech bubbles with their insults or compliments, however doesn't need to verbally say these words, they can internally say them and have the speech bubble manifest them. When these words hit their target effects will be given based upon what was said about them. Furthermore the user can also swell the words about furthermore the user can also use this ability on themselves by first manifesting it in their mouth and then swallowing it. These insults can also affect inorganic objects. Furthermore by specifying a Target the verbal attack/compliment will only chase and affect that Target and nothing else. It is also worth noting that disability works on those that are capable of comprehending words and they don't necessarily have to hear what the user says. These abilities can affect the mental, emotional, and physical state of their target. The words in the thought bubble are colored according to their meaning: golden for positive and purple for negative.
When compliments or positive words are given to someone usually they usually manifests in the form of healing or improving an ability (whether quirk related or not). For example, calling someone a genius will actually increase their intelligence. Like any words the more personally tailored towards that person it is the more effective the power will become. These powers can also affect mental abilities and emotional states. The downside of this Quirk is that sometimes complimenting someone too much can lead to them having an ego.
When insults or words with negative intentions are spewed often it results in a negative effect on the target sometimes manifesting as a physical impact. The user can also use simple insults for effect based attacks. For example, “Idiot” will make that person an idiot. If this quirk targets someone the target knows such as “Yo mama” jokes that insults affects who that person considers their mother. Insults about somebody's physical figure can also physically affect. Example of one says “You're so short you need a ladder to sit on the sofa” it will physically shrink that person to the point where they actually need a ladder to sit on a sofa. If the user creates more personal and creative insults the effects will also increase the potency of this Quirk's effect.
Weaknesses:
• Only apathetic beings such as Nomu are Immune to this ability.
• Covering the user's mouth prevents them from affecting others.
• Overuse of this quirk can lead to a sore throat.
• The insults become more effective if the user specifies a target or if the target associates themselves with the insult.
• The effects of this quirk will persist until the user actually drains their power from another person via contact AKA eating their words.
• The more effort behind the person's insults and or compliment the more powerful the effect said words will have.
• There is a limit to how much of a boost and healing the compliments can provide.

Wow, this one might me a long one.
So I moved to (undisclosed location) sometime in the beginning of last year. When I moved here I really had no friends but became heavily involved in this yoga studio I went to and slowly but surely started to make friends/acquaintances with the teacher that instructed me.
From afar she seemed super cool and I became pretty enthralled with her and her life. I would look forward so heavily to going to her classes every week and was quite intrigued by her. I thought she was funny, bubbly, spunky, cool, and always made jokes during class that made me laugh. As months went by I found myself wanting to get closer and closer to her, and she even invited me out one time to one of her “events” she was hosting. Here’s the thing;
It seemed like we had a lot in common and was just generally craving camaraderie and connection. I felt a sense of belonging with her and wanted to expand that energy in my life, and wanted to do anything I could to get closer to her for those reasons. But I guess this is where we have the first red flag;
One day after class, she extended an invitation to me to a meet up of sorts, (I’m being sparing with details just out of fear she might read this) and when she invited me it seemed like it was gonna be this big thing with lots of people invited, and just in general in talking to her it seemed as if she was very well connected and respected within her community, had lots of friends and connects, and I thought this was gonna be a huge thing that I was even lucky to be invited to. I was super stoked and exited about it.
However when the day of the event came, I was super tired and slow to getting up that morning. I figured I would just make my way over whenever I could since it seemed causal and like you could drop in whenever. I also figured there would be more than enough people that no one would really even notice my arrival or departure. (Plus, sometimes it’s chic to be fashionably late ;) ). Well…. I was most definitely wrong.
When I showed up I heard someone excitedly shout my name, which was her, and she waved me down to the “meet up”…. There was literally only one person there and it had been going on for 2+ hours. I was definitely a bit unnerved, but also didn’t want to be rude, and like I said I was just kind of happy to be there and be getting invited to things. But it was kinda like, damn…. Are these all the friends you have?
I had dressed up and looked cute but they were just kind of wearing whatever and I felt awkward and overdressed and also embarrassed now that I was even this late because it was clearly much more intimate than I expected and my arrival/absence was DEFINITELY felt. We had chatted a bit and that was cool but then I remember her confessing me that she had cried to her husband earlier that morning that she was scared nobody was going to show up and how thrilled she was that not only one, but TWO people had showed up and that it felt like she had friends. I wasn’t really sure what to say or make of that.
She also…. The whole time (and mind you, this is our first legitimate interaction out of yoga class) just kind of kept talking maniacally AT me, not to me, and was coming off almost even manic, and she had formed a white crust of spit around her mouth probably from talking so much that I couldn’t look away from. To say the least, I was a bit disturbed coming away from this interaction but I just kept telling myself that I was being too judgmental of her and to give it a chance and that maybe she was just hyper that day and that I had probably had unintentional embarrassing hygiene moments as well. So I keep going to class and that’s that.
There were several other red flag moments between this first interaction and the next one, mostly just her incredibly cringey social media presence that I genuinely almost couldn’t stand to see without feeling like I was withering away inside, but maybe I’ll save that for later. It’s almost like I couldn’t just see that the person I thought was so cool in class and the person I was seeing her be online and outside of class were the same people. But I digress.
She had actually ended up inviting me to go with her on one of her international yoga retreats, and I was actually very excited about this. I had very little time with her in between classes, and my attraction (but also repulsion) with her was growing stronger and I wanted to figure her out and see what she was really about and what the pull I was feeling towards her was about. Plus, I love travelling and just thought it would be fun.
I had a pretty good time, but we didn’t get to talk much, HOWEVER, I do remember this distinct point during the trip where it was myself, 2-3 other fiends I had made, her brother, and her “best friend” who had happened to be her brother’s Gf in a room together, talking. the brother, the best friend, and the other friend I made just all completely started talking shit about her and I was so confused.
I felt super hurt by this actually, bc I felt like I had a inexplicable bond with the teacher who had invited me, she was the reason we were all there in that beautiful place, and I just couldn’t understand why they were choosing to be so negative about someone I thought they had claimed (at least by title) to love. They would say things like “I can’t fucking stand your sister” (one of the friends I made to the brother) and everyone would just sigh and put their hands in their head and be like “I know…. I know. It’s a lot. She’s a lot”. And I didn’t have anything to add to the conversation because I was just so confused and I knew the girl would just be so upset if she heard them saying this. Anyway… that confusion stuck with me for a while after.
Fast forward maybe a month or two, I started hanging out with her more regularly myself outside of class. I would say this is when we became more “friends”. She would invite me to other teachers classes and we would talk a lot about our lives.
I learned how she felt about her close friend and family connections, and how she often felt hurt and betrayed by people close to her and how some of her friends were actually really shady. I just got a general sense of her feeling scapegoated and libeled against by ppl that got close to her and how she had walls up for that reason.
She also shared to me that most of her family was cut off, with the exception of her brother who she had recently rekindled a connection with, hence why he was on that trip. I felt very bad for her and wanted to be a source of comfort and support, and she would often comment on how she felt a sense of camaraderie with me since I also (LITERALLY) had no family and how we have to make our chosen family. This was a sweet sentiment, for sure, but I was still sussing out how I felt about her.
So one day, a mutual friend that had been on the trip with us was having a birthday party and I guess that she was invited to it, too. She sat down next to me and I was SUPER excited to see her as I was craving her energy and hadn’t seen her in some time. But then… idk. She had had a lot to drink. I’m fully aware that she’s kind of a quirky individual, and has a way of socializing which I can sometimes find a bit uncomfortable or even intense, (like the first meetup I spoke of) but this time it was even more and seemed to be heightened by the drinking.
Her husband was sitting on her other side and kept trying to interject and insinuate that maybe she was doing a bit much, but I think she was drunk enough to the point that she just found it funny and had no awareness of how she was coming off. There’s not even a way I can describe it really, but she just seemed a bit obsessive over me and kept making jokes that were literally not funny and seemed to have lost all ability to read the room. I also had noticed that she had only had TWO beers and was acting like this already which I found… really strange.
So at some point she goes to the bathroom, and I also get in line for the bathroom about 5 mins later. When I get up to the bathroom, she’s still in there, and there’s a line of about 2 or 3 people ahead of me. When she exits the bathroom she immediately spots me and rushes up to me and just starts… drunkenly spewing.
I can’t even remember what she was saying, but we were in a pretty high class establishment and I remember her gushing over me and was saying “I just want to let you know that I don’t really have friends or let people close to me in my circle but I just want to let you know that YOU are officially in my circle and you have earned friend status to me and I’ve let you in my circle…” or something like that. And I just kept thinking, who tf even says that??? I’m pretty sure the last time I checked that friendship is a two way street and it’s not just a title we bestow onto some “lucky” person and that’s that. Like girl… let ME decide if I want to be friends too first.
It was partially that, and also the way she was drunkenly spewing was so awkward and embarrassing bc I could tell all the other women in line were like who tf is this bitch and why is she saying all this weird stuff and like, does she even know you?? Lol. Just a very odd interaction which again, I kind of wrote off, but the unsettling feeling kind of just kept growing after that point.
Then, the time that I REALLY knew something was up came up about a month later, but there are still some key details of this story that are missing. Perhaps I will discuss them later.
SO. About a month later, she invited me last minute to this concert of sorts. When I got there, I was super excited to be there, the vibes were amazing and we were having so much fun. But she had definitely had a lot, A LOT to drink. I didn’t mind at first, because everyone there seemed severely under the influence, but she would just start randomly kind of lashing out at people in the crowd and she thought it was funny? She first loudly and audibly started making fun of some guys shoes in front of us, and was trying to laugh with me as if I would join in, but when his girl friend turned around and shot her a dirty look, she had the nerve to be self conscious and mad about it. She would loudly poke fun at other people in the crowd too, but not in a ha-ha way, just in a straight up mean and asshole way and I could not understand why she would even do that or why she thought that was funny.
Again, I kind of just awkwardly laughed and brushed it off. But when all was said and done and the concert was closing, she enthusiastically invited me back to go to her house and soak in her hot tub. I kept saying are you sure?? But she was like please, PLEASE come, we have weed, we’ll smoke you out and other things and I wanted to continue the vibes because it sounded fun. And then….. completely downhill.
I had arrived back at their place before she did, but as soon as I saw them go in I knocked. When I walked in, she was pale faced up on the floor, non verbal, pretty much motionless, and staring at the ceiling. I was like oh no… it seemed like she got a bit too much to drink. I waited patiently there for a few mins, unsure of what to do as I had just drove for 45 mins and I was still 25 mins in the opposite direction away from home.
I kind of just sat around, and hoped that she would sober up. I asked if she was drunk… she said no. She ran to her bathroom multiple times while her husband (a complete socially awkward case himself) tried to take care of her while she threw up. I asked her if she puked and she also said no. So I didn’t really know what to do. I was trying to offer support/ empathy but she just kept denying any claims of anything being amiss. Her husband left to pick up a pizza and I probably just should’ve left but I’m telling you I had no idea how to exit their house without making it weird or awkward. And I also was hungry. So I just stayed… and waited for the pizza.
What happened in those 20-30 mins, I don’t even know if I can fully explain. She just became… so FUCKING WEIRD. she clearly was embarrassed that I was seeing her drunk, and I think was trying to over compensate. But she just turned into an absolute freak show and I’ve never been more uncomfortable in my life.
She started hoola hooping in my face, and making these weird gremlin faces and noises at me, fell to the floor, rolled round on the floor while continuing to make the noises, convulsed on the floor, but tried to do it in a funny way, tried to make an interpretive dance for me… I’ve truly never experienced something so uncomfortable in my life. I probably do sound like an asshole, but I swear you would just have to be there to see how a) gross and b) weird and actually scary it was. I was genuinely frightened.
I’ve never seen anyone act like that and I didn’t want to make her more uncomfortable or weird by showing her how clearly uncomfortable I actually was. so I just sat there and tried to laugh. But it probably came off as more of a grimace. And for the record, this woman is 33. I am 26. It was just. Obscene.
And she’s tried to act like and say multiple times that she’s like my “big sister”. Now I’ve seen a lot of drunk behavior, but not this. I wolfed down my pizza, and so did she, and she started to get even more philosophical and weird on me, showing me songs and art which were quite frankly some of the worst things I’ve ever heard in my life, and I left as soon as I could.
I was so shaken and disturbed coming away from this, because like I said earlier, I thought she was a cool girl, but honestly her behavior and lack of control over herself completely terrified me. And it’s not like she was drinking liquor, it was just damn IPAs. And I just did not know what to do.
Some details I will try to add to this story, even though I know it’s monolithic at this point , is that 2 months prior to this she had gotten fired from the studio she worked at.
She had a mental breakdown during class because the manager was being mean to her, and he fired her on the spot. I remember being so angry with the owner, (honestly he IS a piece of shit human being) but I thought he was being sexist by calling her mentally unstable and I thought the way he handled things was unfair.
I went so far as to boycott the studio and completely remove myself from it in support of her and followed her to her new one. After the drunk #2 incident, I didn’t hang out with her very much, and only saw her during her class as I was locked into a certain number of classes I had paid for.
I remember her telling me that she had just started at ANOTHER studio, and got fired 3 days after on her birthday and she was talking about how unfair it was and how much of an asshole that new girl was for firing her… and I believed her. AGAIN.
I went so far as to block that girl on Instagram too, but deep down I kind of knew that she had probably just been fired bc let’s face it… as I was starting to discover, she WAS a lot. and the studio was in an upper class area , catered towards more upper echelon people, and I just don’t think she was fitting that image. I lent her an empathetic ear, because that’s all I would want in that situation.
But where she fucked up was sending me screenshot proof of the text exchange between her and that girl, thinking I would take her side, and later sending me screenshots of another conversation she had with the OTHER manager. She told me that this new girl fired her for bringing her husband to class. In my mind I was like, oh no, is she racist!?! Because her husband was black. But no, that’s not what I read at all.
It was the most reasonable, level headed response to someone ever, and laid out multiple offenses and reasons she didn’t want her at the studio. The reasons were honestly so embarrassing that I don’t know why she would send it to me and think I would side with her. She recently also sent me messages with the other boss and the last thing he says to her is “I hope you get help for your mental illness because whatever you have is serious and will impact all your relationships and business and things that you do”. And honestly I can now say in retrospect that those were the truest words ever spoken.
When I read these texts, I had a look back at my whole relationship with and how she would always paint everyone else to be the villain and how everyone is so mean to HER… and the whole time the common denominator was her. It was always her. And it made me rethink everything.
I’ve even had extensive conversations with some of the other people on her trip that were talking shit and couldn’t stand her and they all told me the same things. How it seemed like she was the coolest person ever and had her shit together and seemed like she was going places… but deep down she was just an absolute mess and pushed everyone away from her. And I no longer felt like I was going crazy.
But like I said, she formed a really close bond with me (I think from her perspective) and said she felt like my big sister and family, and shared all these stories about her feeling isolated and shut out by people, but now here I am, doing the exact same thing to her. Icing her out of my life. And I just wanna ask you guys…
Am the asshole?

First I just need to say thank you for all the reports on the many, MANY suicide posts that have come through lately. I've had so many "2: Someone is considering suicide or serious self-harm" reports come through my feed in the last few days/week.
I want you to know exactly what happens when I get those reports....and you're not going to like this. Please read every word of this LONG post! TL:DR at the bottom.
I ignore them. As in press the Ignore button.
WHY?
Two reasons. 1. People are hurting here and I've allowed those posts because this group has always been open to anyone with any issue within the "finding a path" idea. 2. I'm not a therapist nor a superhero. I cannot go fly in to save them from their own mental health, swoosh their life to better, and leave them feeling all the sunshine and rainbows!
However, if the post is definitely an "announcing my suicide with no wish to find a path out of it"....I report the name to Reddit to step in, as there is a new partnership with the Crisis Hotline. Do I do this with every single post that mentions suicide at the end but otherwise states their issues and wants help out of it in some way? Nope. They are allowed to be that low. Without being reported to the Crisis Hotline for it.
There's nothing else I can do for the person professionally. There's nothing more WE can do more for them. We're here to help people find a path, or even a way out of their pain, and as long as we are leaving supportive, helpful, kind, and actionable comments....that's all we can do. We are nothing more than pointers, we are not therapists or situation-changers for people, but what we are doing is decently life-changing for an online forum and hopefully a bit of life-saving.
Some people are simply too low to help and our job can only be to point them to the extreme therapy they need, via resources and links if possible.
These posts are depressing though! Yes, they are, and I too can only handle so much of them. After clearing the feed, I basically can do 2 posts of helping/actionable comments a day!
And the easy path is me just making a rule that says a nasty quip like "this isn't an airport, you don't need to announce your suicide" and set Automoderator to remove all posts that say the words we no longer want to hear. Removing all the not fully serious ones too, because I can't code Automod with AI ability. Cementing to people that they are not welcome and should go through with the act, convincing people that they can't even get help when they reach out as a last ditch attempt.
Is that who we are? Should we truly go that way? Should we niche down (bubble) to become exactly like careerchange? Cast out those in the most need, because we don't like seeing the negativity?
If they can't come to this group for hope....then where should they go?
Your ideas on this are very welcome.
Your mental health is important too.
If you contribute a lot to this group, you are completely allowed to burn out, especially if you give in this group a lot (and I love you for it!) You are absolutely welcome to take a break. There's a lot of people in need, and I'm hoping with tweaks to this group (and an upcoming plan I'm working on behind the scenes), we can offer even more actionable support, without feeling drained at the end of the day.
That said, I am open to ideas about select, little known helpful resources and how to position them in this group for best effect. Group Wiki? Does anyone actually read those? I'm only allowed 2 pinned posts at any one time so I'm not sure that's the best thing to use. I'm open to a new Rule that is actually just a link but what the link would go to, how to organize such a resource list....etc.
To sum up (and TL:DR) That report to me has been somewhat useless in this group (except for the new Crisis Hotline partnership Reddit has, and yes the extreme ones I definitely send over to them!) I'd like people to only report to us when it's a more extreme "suicide announcement". Those who are on the lighter side, more just lost in the weeds, please use your energy to give them ideas and paths out instead. Community involvement welcome on what I'm saying (read the whole thing first then). I get the posts are tough, take care of your mental health and don't give more than you have per day. Open to resource-positioning ideas.