I’m in living hell! And have been the past 6 months. Need some advice / motivation from fellow bar staff.
I’ll try to keep this brief. I’ve been working as bar staff/waitressing since I was 18( now 24) for extra cash, help with school and uni and now I’m saving up to move back to London to start getting my foot in the door with the film industry . I moved back with my parents in October and was worried about not being able to get any work in my small town. Job opportunities are very small here. Luckily for me a new business was opening in November . It’s a badeli for snotty face rich people to sip champagne and bitch about diets, trans people and everything that’s not them basically. The 2 female owners seemed nice at first but then true colours started to show about a couple months into the job.
They are never here as they also work as wedding planners so I work alone a lot pretty much train any new person as well. I’m doing 6-10-12 hour shifts by myself and even left alone for hours on weekends. The place is dead during the week and doesn’t really pick up until weekend evenings. It’s very difficult to manage mentally can’t believe I’ve done 6 months of this. I’m also being spied on by the landlord and his little minions that work opposite. This man is a vile perv who’s made inappropriate sexual comments to me. Get this the women who own the bar and work with him encourage his inappropriateness. The owners have lied about giving us training, don’t let us discuss shift swaps?!, never genuinely thank me, extremely passive aggressive and haven’t offered me a pay rise or supervisor position(I’ve asked for this role a few times). I sliced my finger on a meat knife when cutting bread, this could have been avoided if training was given.
I’ve been the only one who’s stayed since the start as I literally have no other choice. I’ve pretty much made the place function as the bosses are never here. I plan to move early October . I would have close to 6k savings and believe my old London bar job will have me back. The bosses are becoming more rude and condescending even to new staff. The sheer lack of nothing to do all day is also what puts people off. Thank god for film streaming apps.
I’m planning to quit mid shift and call them out on their shit and how I’ve been treated. I also want to call that guy a perv.
So , i have about four months left and I’m struggling being treated this way for so long but I cannot quit. Anyone in a similar position or has been ?

I need to get away from 5e-brain. Can you recommend me easy to learn systems?
As the title suggests, I would like to play a different system than D&D 5e, and (mostly) lurking in this sub has exposed me to many systems (probably too many). I am not really looking for a 5e alternative; I'm looking for something that steers me and my players away from the trappings that D&D 5e and its adjacent systems encourage.
The core of my group consists of me and two other guys; they only GM 5e. I ran a one-shot and a homebrew campaign in 5e and an intro adventure in SotDL. We also have a few players that rotated in and out, mostly due to scheduling or reliability issues. Currently, we have just one other player: the girlfriend of one of the others (She is new to RPGs).
I feel like the playstyle we have is very typical for a 5e group, heavily influenced by Critical Role and similar actual play series, and it's just not what I want to run. I am looking for a game that needs to be played differently and gives advice on running and maybe even playing it. I've read a few systems, but I want to be confident enough to run the system and be able to give pointers to my players on how they should think about the game. (Two of the criticisms of the level-0 adventure in SotDL were that they felt like they could not do that much and that it was too similar to 5e.)
This is further complicated by language: it would be great, if it's available in German, since only me and one other player speak English well enough to easily read and comprehend paragraphs worth of text.
So, I'm looking for a system that:

• doesn't have too many rules
• is distinctly NOT 5e
• has advice on running and playing it, maybe even examples
• is preferably available in German
• no hard sci-fi and strictly historical stuff, since I'm personally not too interested in it

If you have a wombo-combo of a system and some high-quality blog posts/videos with the desired guidance, that would be okay too :)

I’ve been thinking a lot about the future of gaming, especially for sandbox and simulation games like Minecraft, Unturned, Skyrim, Terraria, Baldur's Gate 3, Ark Survival Evolved, and The Sims 4, Fall Out 4 ECT. I think in the near future, we could see these games evolve in a way that makes them more immersive and dynamic.
using something like ChatGPT-4, and having it acting as a "Dungeon Master" or "God" within our favorite game worlds. kind of like how Helldivers II has been confirmed to has a Game Master This AI wouldn’t just be a passive element though; it would actively control and enhance the game environment, creating a living, breathing world around us.
he pint is to have an AI integrated into the game, dynamically controlling various aspects to simulate a more realistic and interactive environment.

1. Core Functions:

• NPC Control and Interaction:
  • The AI will log character interactions and conversations with NPCs to give them the appearance of having dynamic behaviors and evolving storylines.
  • this also allows for spontaneous quest generation and the ability to recruit NPC's
• World Management:
  • The AI can also regulates day-night cycles, weather patterns, and even natural disasters.
  • It can control resource acquisition, population growth, and simulate jobs

1. Enhanced Gameplay:

• Realistic Simulation:
  • In Minecraft, for example, the AI could simulate realistic town or city dynamics, managing villagers’ tasks like gathering resources, building structures, and fulfilling communal needs.
  • It could also come up for reasons enemy's are spawning like and "evil wizard or something"
  • Things like the pillagers could become and issue if not dealt with Ect.
• Adaptive Challenges:
  • The AI could adjust the number and behavior of enemies based on player progress and world conditions.
  • It can introduces dynamic events that challenge players in novel ways. in Minecraft for example it could spawn a a bunch of volcanos, or have a pillager uprising Kind of like how events can happen in the game for the king 1 & 2 and you have to complete tasks to prevent it form getting worse

I believe particularly in a game like Minecraft it is if you limit the world size and run this of a kind of beefy server you could almost simulate the whole world via keeping chunks loaded and stuff adding mods on top of that would be awesome too

Hi there, a week ago I received a debt collection Letter for a property I was not on the tenancy for but briefly stayed at due to being temporarily homeless.
I immediately called United Utilities who asked for proof, via my current tenancy and theirs.
Their tenancy showed the names of the 3 tenants, followed by the guarantor. I also included my tenancy which placed me at my current residence for just under a year.
They have now reached back out and said my evidence is "invalid" and they want a council tax bill for the period of time the bill covers.
After calling Citizens Advice, Step Change and researching on GOVUK, all of which reached the conclusion that all I needed to do was provide the tenancy for the supposed address I was at, and that should be enough, never mind my own tenancy.
I was informed only those on the tenancy and the guarantor are liable for unpaid bills.
Are United Utilities allowed to just bypass the tenancy, or are they just pushing in hopes I will give up and just pay?
Any advice is much appreciated!
Edit: Just wanted to add on that United Utilities also stated this was a auto-generated bill, due to the tenants not actually paying the bill, which I was unaware of. And I am based in England.

https://preview.redd.it/6oxf4r23ws0d1.png?width=1008&format=png&auto=webp&s=b4f771ef9c070bf1f3bbd820bec1c521f25109c6
So I called TD Bank customer service and questioned the charge. Who wouldn't? The rep says there was an error in my wife's verification because the SSN did not match when they checked it. I'm still determining who they checked with, because, we showed them the Social Security Card, driver's License, and marriage certificate. So my wife and I stopped work in the middle of the day (luckily, we have the freedom to do this) and drove 20 minutes to the nearest branch to fill out a W-9 form and again show the SS card. We were assured that the matter was handled and the pending charge would be removed within hours.
The next day, I got a text from my daughter, who said that her lunch money account at school was out of funds. This account is on auto-pay from the TD checking account. I checked the app once again, and I still -$99 million in that savings, and apparently, the checking is frozen. I had yet to try to use the account up to this point. I again called customer service and told them the tale. They put me on hold and blindly transferred me to a "supervisor," who explained that they did not get the W9 and that we would need to go to a branch and fill out a new one.
I explained that this was not happening and that they would need to fix it and give me access to my money. I have been a TD customer for four years, and my information was already "verified." They apologize and said there was nothing they could do and that my wife would have to go to a branch so they could verify the information. I then called the local branch and explained the situation, which they knew about because the TD verification department had notified them. I told them I would be down at the branch in an hour and that either the issue would be resolved or I would need all my money in cash, and the accounts would be closed.
After waiting an hour, I went to the branch and asked if the issue had been resolved. I knew it had not as the app still showed the -$99 million. I asked for my money and I was told I could not get it because the account was frozen. I sat patiently for 2 hours waiting for them to fix the issue. I provided them with the same information we had already provided on multiple occasions. After 2 hours, I was done and demanded my money and the closing of the accounts. They got this done in 15 minutes.
Now I understand TD thought they were protecting themselves from fraud. However, some faceless security officer should have reached out to the branch to understand exactly what was happening, and we could have been notified that further verification was needed to add my wife to the account. But this is not what they did. Instead, TD attempted to steal $99 million from my account and then froze the account.
I advise anyone doing business with this institute to remove all their funds and find a nice local bank where you can talk to the faceless people who make irrational decisions and you can get actual customer service. I do feel bad for the local branch folks who did their job and attempted to solve the issue. However, I suggest they seek new employment with a company that cares about their customers instead of stealing from them and causing them grief.

So. 20 minutes before my final results of the second year core modules on the LPC and they send this email. Not even my name, just “student”, telling me they are delaying results of another FIVE DAYS. I called up assessments to get the over the phone, they can’t do it. Called up me course lead to find out what’s going on, and she couldn’t give me straight answer about why they are delayed. I asked if it’s because they’ve not been marked, and if that isn’t the case and it is technical, how they know it’ll be fixed by next week at 2pm. Nothing. Yet another example of how utterly disgraceful this “university” is.. I’ve seen better circuses. I have loved a formal complaint and will take it to the ombudsman if necessary. They have already had to give some in my cohort (those who could be bothered to continue with a complaint) £100 via BACS. I am so disgusted. What’s even funnier is it’s mental health week and they think things like this are going to be helping anyone’s mental wellbeing???

Hello Everyone!
My name is Vinícius, I'm from Brazil and I have some history here in "Gift of Games", as I have requested "Diablo 4" 22 times, "Helldivers 2" 8 times and more haha!
​
What is Shin Megami Tensei V: Vengeance
SMT V: Vengeance is a very hard, strange and interesting JRPG, it has some dark themes that make it stand out from the majority of games on this genre.
The game features a monster catching system(more like demon catching in this case) that enables you to recruit, improve and fuse demons that you find everywhere. It is very unique because for you to recruit them you have to chat with them, and sometimes it doesn't work like you expected, the demons may not want to join you or maybe they even want to trick you into giving them something and just vanishing after, the outcomes are very funny sometimes.
The newer version improves the game in many ways, it has a lot of QOL features, but the biggest difference is a totally new campaign, since most fans thought it was the weakest point of the original version.
​
Why Shin Megami Tensei V: Vengeance?
I'm a very big JRPG fan and have been for many years, I like many of the old ones and also newer ones, but I'm specificaly found of the ATLUS games like the SMT and Persona series. They have such a personality that you can always be sure that they are made by ATLUS the moment you see a frame of it.
I have been waiting to play this game since 2021 when it released, since I don't have a Nintendo Switch, but it feels like even more time and I'm sure it will be worth it.
​
Why can't I buy it?
All games are very expensive here, I live in a small town in Brazil, a country in which the AAA games cost R$ 300(our currency is called Real) or even more, and the minimum wage is R$ 1.412, so it costs a big % of the minimum wage, it's absurd. I am a photographer who is still trying to make a living of it, I had many jobs before but some fired me and some I just could not keep up because they had a huge tow on my mental state. From my experience the only job that could maintain me without destroying my mental is photography, I just love it, and I took too long to realise that I could do something important with it.But the point is that not only AAA games, but all game prices here went up really fast on the last few years, and it's impossible to keep up with it. I am struggling at the moment to acomplish my objectives professionaly, and I believe that this game may make my days a little easier.
But the most important reason why I can't buy it is that my city right now is going through the biggest natural catastrophe the country has ever seen. I live in Pelotas, in the state of Rio Grande do Sul, and we have many cities very close that were completely vanished because of a flood, and I mean that literally, some cities will now cease to exist because everything was consumed by water. The situation here is sad, we have never seen something of that magnitude in our lives, if you want to have an idea just search about it and watch some videos, it's devastating...
Now my city is also starting to suffer because of the flood, I think my house is probably safe for now, but now I can't even work, nobody can do anything until this passes, and even after that, we will have to deal with the problems that will appear. Some people lost everything they had, some people lost their family, their pets, the whole country is trying to help but there is no way to really stop it now.
So I basically just want this game to keep me sane during these dark times that we are living here, I know it will not make life easier, but it might bring me a little more joy so I can face the problems in a better shape than I am right now.
​
I think I don't have anymore to say, so I just hope someone reads this poorly written but full of sincerity text. 😁 Thank you SO much for giving me the opportunity to ask for something like this, you have no idea how much this means to me and how surprised I am that we have some people here with that kind of generosity!
Shin Megami Tensei V: Vengeance
Steam Profile

Today is a special day IRL and with the newest releases in the NC Mall, thought this would be a good way to celebrate. I have pretty much all the NC UC that I've ever wanted so I would love to give back to some community members here.
Giveaway as follows:

• Royal PB
  
• Styling Studio Supplies
  
• Deluxe Styling Studio Supplies x3
  

Simple requirements:

1. Account at least 1 month old (was going to do more, but want to support those returning to the game)
   
2. Pick a Pokemon (the pokemon's number will be your raffle number). List of pokemon here
   

I highly encourage those who can spend the NC or has the NPs to spend to not participate to allow others to have a chance :) The giveaway will end in 24 hours and I will comment the 5 winners and their prizes. Winners will be chosen at random via a number generator. I will allow 24 hours for them to respond - if no response I will select another winner.
Please no DMs/Chats and Thanks for being a great community!

So for context, back in january we broke up. well, he broke up with me. I stayed trying to contact him for about a week and a half two weeks before giving up with his “ stop contacting me.” “ i don’t wanna talk to you” and all that. Well i assumed, we were over, was never gonna hear from him again.
Well i was trying to cope, trying to move on. So i found a new guy i was talking to about 3-4 weeks after our break up. I understand he was just kinda a rebound guy since i was still processing. So i flirted with him, he flirted with me. We slept otp, i let him call me names and be sweet to me. Well about 2 weeks after i met him, my ex came back. obviously i’m still in love with him. so after about a week or two of him coming back, i went back to him.
With this he knew about the dude i was talking to while we were separated and got mad at me. He claims i cheated on him, and i was unloyal. I ended up agreeing with him, bc it was wrong on me to use the dude the way i did to cope with my breakup but i agreed. This led to arguments constantly, and us being on and off again.
Well flash forward to now, we broke again about 2 weeks ago. Me and him still talk on and off daily. He still calls me all his names, we still say i love you, we occasionally call, we still buy each other things. We just aren’t dating? Well i asked him yesterday if there was any hope for us ever again. And he says he just needs time bc he can’t let go of what i did.
I understand that and i accept it just, if we truly wanted to work out bc try to be better i feel like we wouldn’t be talking the way we are right now. We’re still on life360 together, so i know when he’s awake, bc his phone isn’t charging anymore, i know when he’s on his phone bc his percentage goes down. But meanwhile he doesn’t text me. And he won’t for hours, until i say i’m going to bed, or i love you. When i know he sees my notifications. Last night he called me to sleep, and he hung up after about 10-15 minutes and texted me saying “ i’ll brb in 5” Well i fell asleep and woke up around 3 hours later to no missed calls, no texts, no nothing. So i texted him saying i was going back to sleep, and nothing in return. when i woke up for good this morning, i texted him i hope he had a good day and i love him. to which i got a text simply saying he wouldn’t have a good day. I tried to help him , he stated he just couldn’t sleep. So i offered to do a something for him i know helps him sleep, to which. no response. When i know he wasn’t asleep yet bc life360, and the fact he was active on insta and tiktok.
i’m just in an awkward stage with him right now, i don’t wanna lose him again bc i rlly do love him and he means the world to me. He told me he needs time and if i wasn’t willing to wait he understood, which i told him i was. it just seems like he isn’t interested in me anymore.

Lore of Athel Loren

The Lore of Athel Loren is a bit of a weird one to adapt, since some stuff straight up doesn't work in Total War. But the same could have been said about Lore of Ice, and they handled that pretty well. Also there's a bunch of additional spells from the Roleplay game that could also be adapted, but since I don't own that book (and I don't trust the wiki) I'm sticking with the 6th edition spell lore.

• Tree Singing: Would either move tree terrain or do damage to units in forest on TT. Which is way too situational in Total War. I think it could be interesting to have a spell that turns an area into forest (since visually Lore of the Hags kind of does that), but it would be pretty useless unless they MASSIVELY buff the bonus welves get in forest terrain. Most likely just be made a damage spell, and maybe it has increased damage if the enemy unit is in a forest or something.
• Fury of the Forest: Would be a pretty straightfoward direct damage spell
• The Hidden Path: This is an interesting one. On TT you used it on a unit and it treated all terrain as open ground (so Strider basically), but it also couldn't be hit by an non-magical missile weapons. I'm not sure exactly how they could implement this, but it would be a neat to have a spell that makes a unit temporarily invulnerable to non-magical ranged fire. Or maybe it could be a variant of missile mirror, except you cast on a friendly unit instead of an enemy? Except maybe balance it out by not doing the projectile reflection, only negation of it? I think this is the most unique one for sure.
• The Twilight Host: Kind of neat one, it gives a friendly unit Fear if it doesn't have it, but if it already has Fear, then it bumps up to Terror instead. I think in addition to this, in Total War maybe if it is a unit that causes Terror, then it further bumps it up to also remove Immune to Psychology?
• Ariel's Blessing: A pretty strong healing spell, but the flavor text also mentions "restoring life to those who have fallen" so could be interpreted as restoring lost models too? Also gave a unit regeneration temporarily afterwards.
• The Call of the Hunt: A spell that buffed up attack and made a unit charge towards the closest enemy near it. Other than attack and charge bonuses in Total War, I'm honestly not sure how to adapt this properly. I think things like this are usually interpreted as Rampage in Total War, but that's not really fun. So maybe it would grant Devastating Flanker temporarily or something? Maybe Glorious Charge?

Lore of the Dark Master

Be'lakor's unique lore of magic from 6th edition. He was later changed to be a Lore of Shadows caster, and Total War went with this direction. But I think it's a real missed opportunity to not include these spells in some fashion in his campaign. Making a unique lore of magic useable by only one character might not be worth the investment, so maybe instead interpret it as Bound abilities, or maybe a spell lore option for the Undivided Daemon Princes. Dark Emissaries would also use them if they are ever added as a generic lord/hero option.

• Bolt of Dark Light: Magic missile, not much else to it except hitting pretty hard
• Betrayal in Death: Idea of this spell is that the spell is cast on an enemy unit, and when they die they would strike their own allies in a zombie-like manner (not actually turning undead). Easiest way to interpret this is maybe a Morghur-like ability where you use it on a low health enemy unit, and they are replaced with a unit of your own. BUT I think it would be more interesting if you cast it on an enemy unit, regardless of model count, and when one of their models dies it causes damage to it's own unit. Kind of like how the Phoenix Guard RoR has models explode on death, but it is self-harming.
• Curse of the Dark Master: So this was kind of a crazy spell. On tabletop it could be cast on any unit on the battlefield, and they suffered -1 tot their ranged and melee attack rolls. With it being permanent and the debuff remained active until the opponent dispelled it, the player who cast it chose to end it, or the wizard casts another spell or is killed.
• In terms of Total War I think it would probably just be a straightforward Hex spell that reduces attack and weapon strength stats. BUT I think it would be interesting to actually implement it like Tabletop. Maybe instead of it using up Winds of Magic on cast, it instead has no duration but slowly drains the WoM until either disabled by the player, the caster is killed, or the caster uses a different spell. It would be a neat option that could differentiate the "normal" debuff spells from ones that are meant to be kind of crazy.
• Fog of Death: Another kind of crazy spell on TT. It literally affected the entire battlefield, and you had to roll for damage on enemy units and roll to see if your own units would take damage as well. I think this would probably be best just as a normal stationary vortex honestly.
• Nightmare: Pretty classic leadership debuff, forced a unit to take a panic test. I think in Total War terms it would probably just inflict Terror on any unit that didn't have Immune to Psychology.
• Coils of the Serpent: An instant kill on a model if it failed a toughness test. In Total War terms this would probably be interpreted similar to Yuan Bo's executioner ability. Maybe an instant kill depending on HP thresholds again? Since it's a reusable spell and not a bound ability, it would either need a crazy high cost to balance it out, or a different requirement for the instant kill.

Lore of the Lichemaster

Kemmler's unique Lore of Magic from White Dwarf #310. It's not actually a unique lore of magic, more like enhanced versions of the Lore of Vampires, meant to represent how Kemmler is one of the most powerful Necromancers around despite only being human. I think this would actually be a way of making Kemmler stand out more than just the resident Krell summoner (who really should be a separate Hero now instead). Especially since they gave Ghorst a Grave Guard summon instead of the guy who was THE Grave Guard guy.
He is THE original Warhammer named character after-all, so he really deserves it imo. I'm not going to really go in-depth here since you can basically interpret these as charged up versions of the standard Lore of Vampire spells.

• Invocation of the Lichemaster
• Desiccating Grasp
• Eternal Vigour
• Withering Gaze
• Kemmler's Danse Macabre
• Curse of Eternities

Lore of Change

So this is kind of a thing and kind of not? Tzeentch's magic has gained and lost a lot from edition to edition. The one we have in-game is the 8th edition version of the lore which HARD focuses on damage. But Tzeentch had a lot of more spells that had more variety in uses in prior editions. I could see them doing what they did with Lore of Ice, by splitting these "leftover" spells into a separate spell lore.
Some of these are from the Roleplay supplements, specifically the Tome of Corruption, while others are from Storm of Magic. Which was an 8th edition supplement so those ones have a higher chance of being added.

• Daemonfire Vortex: Storm of Magic, Pretty classic Vortex spell.
• Dispel Mortal: Yeets a person into the Realm of Chaos. I don't think it is likely, but I think it would be hilarious to reuse the Blue Scribes death animation, where Tzeentch grabs them and pulls them into a portal for this. Maybe an instant kill that has an animation on humanoid characters to drag them in? Pipe dream material here, but fun to think about.
• Gift of Tzeentch: From the Realm of Sorcery RPG book. Basically gives a mage a spell they normally wouldn't have. I think this could be implemented similar to the Blue Scribes gimmick, except only for one spell slot. Like you press it, and it swaps itself out for one random spell before swapping back.
• Transformation of Tzeentch: Could be interpreted as a Morghur-like ability that turns units into Chaos Spawn of Tzeentch. Specifically doesn't work on Undead, and probably wouldn't work on Constructs/Elementals either.
• Destroy Magic***:*** Would be very interesting to have a Tzeentch spell that negates magical attacks or silences spell casting by the enemy. Tzeentch not only emphasizing his own strong magic, but shutting down other's magic makes a lot of sense. We have the former with things like the Lammasu's passive aura, and the latter has been implemented with things like the Jet Lion's contact effect. So it could work as a spell too.
• Tzeentch's Blessing: From the RPG, and it was just to gain a random mutation. But I think it would be fun to have it give random buffs. There's a lack of fun RNG in these games, so the idea of maybe randomly making your unit have stalk, or a random chance of regen for a short time would be neat.

There's also the various "coloured" fires of Tzeentch from older material, like Yellow Fire would give a shield for example. But I don't think they would make it in, since the 8th edition spells were a direct replacement for those.

Misc. spells from existing Lores that aren't in-game

There's a TON of spells from various supplements over the years that aren't part of their respective spell lores in game. So I'm not listing them all here, but things like the Tomb Kings had some interesting Incantations prior to the Lore of Nehekara being made, and there is a TON of stuff in supplements like Storm of Magic we could possibly include in-game.
Anyways those are my thoughts on some potential spells that can be added in the future? Any other obscure stuff I missed? Any interesting spells for Lore of Athel Loren from the RPG book that could be added instead? Would love to brainstorm more on this with y'all.

So we live in a subdivision and we have a neighbor on one side and they were on the other side so the neighbors who moved in because we were here first and it's a brand new subdivision they are pretty cool they keep themselves they are kind of private just like us, the other neighbors beside us they from the start have been very adamant and in your face kind of neighbors
But that's not the issue the issue is how we ended up on meeting and what's been going on ever since
Usually my family we go ahead and we take my children myself and my husband to go knock or ring the doorbell and introduce ourselves and strike up friendly conversation etc, this is how we see it appropriate or just meeting everybody so we're not going back and forth then doing that whole thing we just want to get it out the way and have everybody meet everybody
So I'm working from home in my home and my husband is outside playing basketball with my children and the neighbors who are kind of in your face are home but the husband and the wife are home and the children the woman next door sends her children inside and then walks over to my husband and just loudly just waves him over and she's like always your wife home and he's like she's busy, and she just like oh I wanted to meet all y'all and all this other stuff and she just said that her children have been trying to meet my children and it was kind of odd because she sent them in before she came over to say hello to my husband and didn't bring her children to say hello to my children who are out there playing basketball with my husband also she didn't make it a point to go inside and get her husband who was also in the home to come outside so they can all collectively say hello which was kind of off-putting.
But nothing else was thought of it so it had been a while since any interaction, me and my children ended up bumping into her husband on our way to the mailbox and we had a conversation and said hello and a few things and my children met his children they started to play because they actually wanted to meet them just like she said and what not so we let them play for a little bit we only just talked for a moment and then I left went back home and then shortly later in the day the whole family comes and shows up to our home I guess he told her that we had a conversation and the children played so I guess she then wanted to come and meet me.
So they show up to the door they come at dinner time and we're just kind of in a rush and so we all say hello and this is when the red flag weird stuff starts to happen is after her husband is standing in front of her she's lightly kind of behind him so he can't really see what she's doing but she's just like back and forth staring down my husband like a piece of meat, giggling and trying to catch his gays repeatedly, and then looking back and forth at her husband trying to see if he's looking or not she didn't look at me one time while she was standing on my porch and then I made a comment and said that I had met one of her relatives when I was going on a bike ride and she said that she likes my hair and my outfit and she said oh okay and then she continued to glance back and forth at my husband and her husband and she had no interest in me and having any kind of conversation or real meeting of hello or anything.
So after that it left a bitter taste in my mouth because people like that they tend to have it all but they need more and they need like attention from the outside even though they have everything right in front of them they can't really see it. but anyway she struck me as this attention seeker and it turns out she actually is.
so her whole family came to the door, we were eating dinner, and they wanted to know if our children could come out and play and I said we just sat down to eat and you can tell that she was bothered by that and bothered by the fact that I answered the door because before she came up she was primping herself on the doorbell camera,
So I let her know that we would be coming out later after we're done so we go over and then I have her children come out and play with my children for a little bit.
We end up having a conversation while they were playing and at first she did seem kind of genuine but then she started to get over the top and just started saying I was so funny and she kept hitting me and trying to be buddy buddy and over and over again putting her hands on me laughing and it was very off putting and very fake feeling like she was trying to get bloody buddy with me somehow very quickly.
She referred to my husband as Daddy and it was kind of off-putting the way she had said it and then because I didn't like the way she said, what about daaaadyy is what she said when she asked about my husbands involvement in our day today which was kind of weird.
So I went ahead and when we were talking I said it back to her yeah your children probably need daddy too and I said exactly how she did and hopefully she got the head but nope and also she was asking me for advice about staying home and needing to be out just needing to be doing something because her husband was taken care of her too much and working but he wasn't even working a lot he work from home and in the office but he said she didn't have to and that he takes care of her but she doesn't want him to she wants to just be out there in the streets essentially doing something and being seen.
Her words not mine.
And she said she can't help it because she had her children she doesn't want to be just cooped up in the house everyday or something like that.
And so that was kind of off-putting and then I mentioned focusing on your family like being present with them and focusing solely on them reaps really good benefits because you create a closer Bond and you don't need outside anything to feel complete essentially what you have is inside of you and I just kind of reference that when she kept saying that she needs to just be on the go when she can't sit still and she said her husband always says that he's got her and that their mom needs them and things like that and I said I agree because I know how I am with my children and I have my children all the time and my family works really great because of the way our dynamic works and I tried to like give some knowledge and information to her but she kind of wasn't hearing it and didn't seem interested really in that dynamic.
So after that day she text me and wants me to go to the park with him but I'm in the shower and I never see her text message till I'm done and I have like this whole routine so it takes about an hour or so until she's just like in the park and I finally text her back the park is up the street and I text her back and she's just like kind of upset that I didn't show up and that's understandable but I did let her know like hey I was busy and I didn't see your text message can we try and do something else and so I let her know that we can have the boys hang out and we hang out tomorrow and then the next day me and my kids went for a walk and she was also on a walk with her child, we briefly passed each other cuz I'm coming out of my house and she's entering up the sidewalk to the driveway to her house she sees me and I just kind of stand there waiting so I can wave her and she just like looks through me and continues to walk
So I didn't think anything of I just kind of laughed to myself because it was kind of a petty cuz she clearly saw me but whatever but I texted her when I got back from the walk and said hey I saw you on our walk a few minutes ago I don't know if you saw me, but I just wanted to let you know that the boys are available at this x amount of time, she text me back later lets me know the time works out so the boys and I come out there later on that day at that time then this was before our dinner time so I tried to accompany and accommodate, my children are out there playing basketball and this woman literally at the exact time at her children are supposed to be out there text me and said one of her children were in trouble and can't come out there we'll catch you all next time
And I said thanks for the courtesy etc and so the next time we saw her was when my husband was cutting the grass I was inside doing some housework he was outside cutting the grass with my children running back and forth doing everything like they usually do and so during that time she makes her way outside and she's got this really short pink dress on and it's like really cold outside and it was just like really alarming to me and she's just like out there walking around sweeping her front porch and then like while my husband is cutting the side that's closest to their house she's like back to back with him and she just makes it a point to be like hey how you doing and just other stuff even though earlier in the day when we got home we both wave to them from the car and said hey and so it was kind of odd that she made another appearance to try and speak to my husband, he brought this to my attention and he said that he was very brief about it because he knows how things are between me and her and how we revives were between us and so he just briefly said Hi and then turn back around and kept cutting the grass and so I guess that wasn't enough attention for her
So after he was done cutting the grass I never took myself outside even though he said that she was out there and was trying to strike up a conversation, after that and he started to do the wrap up , but the hose away put the gutters back on and all that stuff blow the grass away.
And so basically I get a notification on my phone from the doorbell camera and the garage camera went off as well and I'm like okay someone has been spotted that's what it says and I look and I see this person standing there in a pink dress mini dress she's right there in front of my house sweeping the grass out of my driveway and sweep in the grass almost basically to the other side of the neighbor's house she's directly in front of my house sweeping my grass up going back and forth essentially waiting for my husband to come out there and I don't know what have an interaction talk I don't know look at me I'm cleaning up your grass I have no idea
And so I let my husband know like I see this happening right now on the camera and then he's just like I'm about to go cook dinner he goes to go cook dinner and I let him know I'm going to handle the cleanup and then I go out there with the broom and I walk out there I don't say anything to her and I just started sweeping and then she looks shocked to see me cuz I don't even think she knew I was home because the car wasn't in the driveway and then she just walks past and she's just wiping her nose and has her head down and she just walks back up to her driveway, her husband was cutting the grass on the other side of the house by the way her children were running around but she was in front of my house and in my driveway back and forth sweeping my grass instead of over there helping her husband with his yard work she was in my driveway and the other side of my yard sweeping the grass
And then she just after she gets back to her side of the house she's just like hey how you doing? And I say good and then I keep sweeping and then like she got this like grin on her face and she's just like see that I'm like visibly like annoyed with her and so she just keeps it moving, and so after that I went to the house and got the leaf blower and just started blowing the grass out so I can get back in the house cuz I was just like I was just really irritable, I'm blowing the grass and then I hear her come up right behind me and say hey hey where did you get that leaf blower at and I turned around and I said I don't know it's old and then I continue to blow the grass away and I guess she took the hat because I was pretty Stern with it and I think she came back to say something to me to see if I was in a good mood or to see if I was still like angry essentially because she got caught doing what she was doing
I didn't sugar coat when I spoke to her and I'm thinking okay she got the hint. And then a few days later she tried to make a playdate and then I said my children are unavailable at that time then, we were going to a nearby Creek and taking my children they wanted to go and we ate before we left we were going to leave around like 4:30 and so we didn't leave at 4:30 we ate and then we were going to leave now as we are eating I get a notification on the doorbell camera and the garage camera yet again and it says person has been spotted I checked the camera and she's out there walking back and forth back and forth back and forth with her children trying to see if we're going to come out trying to see if she can wave at us in miraculous and any kind of way I don't know but she's in front of our house her house on the complete other side and she's just back and forth walking with them
And we ended up leaving a close to 5:00 p.m. so by that time she already went in the house
And after that I just was done with any kind of interactions with her because she is very off putting and she gives off this vibe and energy of I am being fake. And I have an ulterior motive and I need to Garner attention from Men even though I have one.
Even the guy next to us was outside cleaning his car and then her husband was in the house yet again and after he went inside I guess he was like busy , So she took it upon herself to scream across the yard and say ooh that looks good. Referring to his car and so he comes over and then starts talking to her across from our yard and and her yard and she starts complimenting his car ridiculously and was just asking a bunch of stuff about his car and his pain and and what he does and how does he get it to look like that and just a bunch of stuff and what crossed my mind was the whole married women complimenting another man's car perfusively was kind of off-putting.
And so they carried conversation for a while and then to the point that he ended up getting his phone and trying to show her something about his paint job and then he actually paused before he actually had her come over and like look at the phone and she goes oh you can send it to me and I don't know if they have each other's numbers or whatever but I heard her say that and then he actually paused and said I sent it to your husband actually and then she was just like oh okay and then she stopped the conversation and went in the house
Just yesterday because we haven't had a moment to cut the grass in a while my husband cut the grass after he got off of work so me and the children were outside and we were all doing yard work like we usually do I was trimming and the boys were trimming and picking things up in the yard and she pulls up. Usually she picks up her kids and then goes in the home closes the garage and we don't see her the rest of the day, but since we are all out here and my husband's got in the grass she made it a point to pull up leave the garage open open trunk and just bring her kids out and have them running around in the driveway which I knew was going to happen, because whenever my husband's out there she makes it a point to be out there but when I hop out she flies inside of her house
So I'm out there packing up my grass and I was done because my mom had called and so I'm on the phone with her and my husband is starting to cut the side of the grass closest to her house and so, I say on the phone and I'm just like talking on the phone while looking into her driveway and garage knowing that she's going to pop out at any second to try and get some kind of attention from my husband because she's been doing that, she actually came out when I was right there just waiting and then she briefly raised her hand and waved while my husband didn't see her so he's over pushing the mower back and forth back and forth and conveniently she's in the garage going from one side of the car to the next side of the car from one side of the car to the next side of the car she did this about eight times
And he never looked her way didn't give her any kind of attention so eventually she went ahead and close the garage cuz I guess she saw me actually noticing what she was doing so she closed the garage and went house so my husband stops or is finished cutting the grass on that side of the house so he pushes it to almost the back of the outside of the fence now they don't have a fence, so her kids ran out and were right there while my husband was cutting the grass I'm guessing she was all so back there as well to try and say hello to my husband from the back of the house because she knew I was in the front of the house
And he said he didn't actually see her he was just focused on cutting the grass but I'm sure she was back there since her children were running around back and forth back there as well.
So that was pretty long but that's what has been happening since she moved in here, I am not sure how to go about anything her children seem very kind her husband is very nice and not red flaggy at all she on the other hand has the need to go up to every single neighbor and talk up people but specifically because I live next door to her it's like a game to her because she finds every moment to speak to my husband I haven't even mentioned the other times that he was out there just like cleaning out the car and she just hopped out it would just stand there and try and get his attention and then he would not give her any attention I wouldn't even look her way, it's like she can hear when we're out there or here when he's out there doing something and she can find a way to speak to him and it's really off putting and I'm not really sure what to do I've been closing all of my curtains and blinds because when she first got here she was actually looking and standing straight across looking straight. Into my house for a lot of good 5 minutes while I was vacuuming and so I close all my stuff up.
I would love some recommendations on how to peacefully handle this situation I am not sure what is going on mentally in this woman's head or why she needs to Garner this attention and I just want to be kind about it because I actually tried again and wished her a happy mother's day but then this incident happened after that so I am just done with the situation I feel like, I don't have any desire to try and be friends with her or even just be neighborly.
I would love some feedback or advice on how to peacefully go about this, the only time we are really out there is to cut the grass and do yard work which is pretty rare so I guess we don't have to really see them.
All feedback is welcome, I am close to pushing 40 so I really don't have the mental energy to deal with this kind of situation anymore I'm feeling like it's beneath me and very childish to actually do any kind of intentional situation as far as ignoring and things like that or being unkind I don't want to get roped into drama and things like that and I just wish that woman healing to be honest.
But I would love some feedback on this scenario thank you.

So basically I have been in search of papers that takes the whole game into consideration and open it apart to understand all of it. By 'all of it' I mean treating the whole game as a text of its own to understand it's narrative progression, emplotment, characterisation, treating the storyline and visual telling as separate texts and understanding all of it through critical theories and literary and social heorisations. I have been in search of any such work but couldn't find anything as my needs. It will be a great great help if anybody can give me any leads about it.

I put that in quotations because I have no idea if that's what we're even doing.
I've been friends (more like acquaintances) with this guy for years. We went to school together and used to text off and on, sometimes talked on the phone. Sometimes I got the vibe he was into me, but I always felt like he was hotter than me so I couldn't see myself with him.
Recently, he texted me and we hung out for the first time. It was nice and the conversation flowed freely. After that he started texting me pretty frequently, which freaked me the eff out. I haven't dated in 7 years and I really want the next man I date to be "the one". I don't want to waste time on anyone else. So I blocked him, just out of nowhere. Because I'm effed in the head.
About 3 weeks went by and I started thinking I was too hasty with the block, and maybe I should give the guy a chance. I unblocked and about a week later I got a stream of texts from him saying "helllooo? you there? where'd you go?", etc. We talked and I apologized. He seemed a little taken aback, but was overall pretty cool about it. He asked if I still wanted him to text me and I said "if you want to" (because I'm wishy washy and a pain in the ass, I know).
He went on vacation shortly after that and texted me almost every day- usually just pics of the places he was at. It was confusing AF because I've never really had male friends, but it seems like this is more contact than just friends?
When he returned from vacation he went 4 days without texting- and not a text on Mother's Day, which I thought was a pretty clear sign he wasn't into me. When you're into someone you look for reasons to text, right? So why miss that one? And why go 4 days? Then he calls me and we have a great conversation, which leads to him asking when we can hang out again. "What would we do?" I ask.
"I don't know, what do you want to do? "You asked me to hang out. What do you want to do?"
"Well, I've got this great big screen TV. And you haven't seen my new place yet."
I told him I'd think about it. But I'm so disappointed! Clearly, if he saw me as dating material, he would have asked me on a date, right?
Do guys really invest this much energy just for a hookup? I have a feeling I know the answer. And I guess if I'm honest with myself he didn't invest much- just a text here and there. It's just more attention than I've had in so long that I made it out to be more in my mind.
So I guess I need to decline, lest I be placed in booty call territory.
FFS this whole culture is so sad and confusing.

Hi Reddit,
I'm currently in a relationship for 1 year with my boyfriend and everything is going fine execpt for one thing, his ex.
To give a little background informantion, they've dated for 10 years and broke up about 3 years ago. The reason for this is that he fell in love with someone else during their relationship but they've seperated as friends. The reason things ended with this previous girl 26f, is because she also had a lot of troubles with his ex. I know he still feels guilty about what he did to her and it's a nice thing you can still be friends after this, well they have dated for 10 years so I can understand it's hard if you have to choose between friends and let some of them go because of this. I would never expect from him to drop his friends because his ex is also there a lot in some occasions, like festivals, drinks, weddings, etc. But my definition of seperating as friends is a lot different than his.
Like her, I feel like I'm not the priority, more like a third wheel sometimes. I'm very insecure about this topic probably because my ex cheated on me with 2 of his exes. It was a very dramatic breakup because of a number of reasons and a long story but I know this made me so insecure and fear it might happen again.
I told him this quite early in our relationship that this is a huge insecurity of mine and I have certain boundaries which he accepted I thought. But I know they have contact quite regularly, mostly text. I told him I wouldn't be comfortable if they were seeing each other just one on one, which I know they did a lot when he was dating the other girl. I'm not sure if he did it in our relationship, I just know of one instance. She was just getting some stuff in the house, were we now live together but he could have just communicated that to me. I know he asked her to come before I was home, which is very weird, if you don't have anything to hide then why do this. Tomorrow it's gonna be the same, she's getting some stuff while I'm at work and he just says I have to accept it and get over my insecurities. We had a lot of fights because of her. I can see her name constantly popping up his phone, so I know they text a lot. He told me they only text each other a couple of times a year, so I know that's a lie. But he just doesn't care anymore, he even enjoys it a litte bit to see me getting afraid I think. He just gets angry and there's no empathy at all.
I remember from the beginning when we were dating he told me to just accept the fact that he's friends with is ex, and I think he said it that blunt because of past frustrations with the other girl. But I was new in the situation and didn't have anything to do with that, in my opinion it was not needed to state it that harsh to me. I told him my story with my ex, but I feel he doesn't quite understand what it did to me. He has never been cheated on, which is good for him ofcourse, but he just doesn't get it what it can do to you. I know I'm overreacting as well, and I'm taking the steps to keep my emotions in control, like going to a therapist for this specific issue. My insecurity is getting the better of me and I'm also being to harsh to him sometimes, I know that. But it takes 2. He assures me he doesn't have feelings anymore, and I do believe that somehow. It's just the communication I don't get from him and understanding, why get so angry, why lie about stuff.
When we were together for a month we were supposed to go to a festival with some friends of his so I'd get to know them better but she was also going to be there. It was a group of 9 people so quite small. I told him that I wasn't comfortable yet doing so, I'm quite introverted and it takes a lot of energy for me to get to know new people. But he just expected me to do this so I could see I have nothing to worry about and everything would be chill and fine from then, but it's not chill and fine for me. I didn't go, but he did anyways and that just hurt me a lot. The first time meeting her was a kind of set up from him and he just pretended like he didn't know this would happen and got angry again at me because I was not prepared for that. And I cannot stress this enough but I told him, communicate these things with me, especially regarding your ex, because of my past experieces.
He just doesn't understand this is a very difficult topic for me and I have other boundaries than most people in this matter I suppose. I told him as well, if you cannot agree with my boundaries then it's no use to be in a relationship with me but he does want to stay and I know he loves me but this bothers me so much. It's no use forcing someone and everyone has different boundaries and insecurities due to past relationships. It's wonderful if you can find someone who can heal with you. I know I have to do a lot of that myself and cannot rely on another person to do that completely for me but still.
I'm someone who needs to talk about stuff and I know he's not used to that. His ex was not like that and they didn't really have that much deep conversations which he missed and he likes the fact that I do. But I can tell this is not in his comfort zone at all. I said it a number of times I really wanted to talk about this topic with him, properly. And he told me I can and I should, 'I promise we'll talk about it, you can ask me anything'. He even admits he avoids it. But it never really happened, and I'm confused as to why he gets so angry and why there's no empathy from his side. He just gets really awkward about it, even when I try to be nice to his ex, and I can because she's a nice girl, he just finds it really awkward. I just don't get it. He wants to push me into this 'friendship' with her but on the other hand that's too awkward for him. He gets angry because I'm insecure and I don't trust him, but he is just so vague about this topic and get no communication, only if I ask the questions.
Can anyone relate to this situation and give me some advice on how to handle this?
TL;DR! I'm very insecure about the relationship between my bf and his ex because of my past expierence of being cheated on with my previous partners ex. My bf expects me to just get over myself and stop being insecure. If I want to talk about it he gets angry because I don't give him trust, but he doesn't want to give me communication around the topic when I ask for it.

Introduction

The main purpose of this guide will be to help unlock the golden dice for those of you who feel less confident about tackling honour mode. This is designed to be a path of least resistance, so we won’t be experiencing everything this game has to offer. It’s also worth noting that instead of focusing on min-maxing for damage; we prioritise safe & consistent damage. We don’t need to be respeccing characters often, if at all, and we won’t be relying on strength elixirs. My girlfriend (u/-babyjanehudson) and I put this together as we’ve beaten honour mode a 5 times now without any failed attempts, we were even in the first 800 people to beat it which is kinda cool! Here’s how we did it. First starting with our builds, then a little general advice and finally just a list of some general Do’s & Don’ts. Apologies for the wall of text.
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Builds:

**[Bardlock](https://www.reddit.com/BG3Builds/s/pMh6196Xp8) (party face) - Great old one Warlock 2, college of lore bard 10 - Cha16>Dex16>Con14>Wis12**
* Key items are the spell sparkler until Markoheshkir, potent robe, quickspell gloves, necklace of elemental augmentation & the warped headband of intellect (great for general party face checks in acts 1+2) at least until you get the birthright at sorcerers sundries in act 3. Once I reach act 3 and have persuaded half of the shadow cursed lands into dying, I personally choose to respec into Sorlock: 2 goolock, 2 fighter, 8 draconic sorcerer. It’s not necessary but I find it gives the edge in combat while in act 3, as there are less dialogue checks available that bard can abuse. Being a sorlock means every morning in camp I can convert ALL level 1+2 spell slots into extra sorcery slots meaning my bonus action is now always being used for eldritch blast thanks to quickened spell meta magic plus we have action surge :) Skill priority for this character is Persuasuion > Intimidation > Deception > Performance > Perception > Investigation. Credit to u/kethrynweryn for this build, it’s easily my fav in the game.
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**Life cleric 12 - Wis16>Con16>Dex14>Str**
(light cleric does more damage so is technically better for experienced players but a life cleric is there to save your run in case of an emergency, something pretty invaluable to beginners in HM as we can’t assume we are winning every fight in the first 2 turns like we ideally aim to)
* key items are reapers embrace, sentinel shield, hell riders pride, the whispering promise & blood of lathander. Other items of note would be luminous armor & the radiant/illumation rings. Most fights will simply involve casting spirit guardians at its highest level and running through crowds of enemies like you’re mowing a lawn, picking up the war caster feat is brilliant for helping you keep concentration when taking attacks of opportunity but i know as a feat it’s a little divisive, just my personal preference. This setup trivialises all combat encounters in act 2. Just remember to check enemies for radiant retort, they’re few and far between but can fuck things up if you forget.
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**Swords Bard Archer (Lockpicker) - 6 Swords Bard, 4 Rogue Thief, 2 Fighter - Dex17>Cha14>Con14>Wis12>Str**
* Key items are hag hair (+1dex), titan string, risky ring, hill giant club, helm of arcane acuity & band of the mystic scoundrel. With this setup every time you attack, you can hold person, fear, vicious mockery or invisibility as a bonus action :) Just make sure to use your slashing flourish as much as possible to maximise damage. Don’t forget to get to the high ground whenever possible to increase your damage.
Skill priority for this character is Sleight of hand > Stealth > Perception > Persuasion > Intimidation > Deception > Acrobatics
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**Barbarian - Wild heart Bear Barb 8, Battle Master Fighter 4 - Str16>Con16>Dex14>Wis12**
* Key items are more flexible here as it’s less dependant on gear. I recommend grabbing the Everburn blade if you can, it really helps during the slog of act 1 (to get it easily, when you first find Shadowheart on the nautiloid immediately swap any one of the spells in her book for Command, then use command drop on Zhalk and steal his sword. I do not recommend trying to fight him for it) Most the time you’ll just wear the usual barb stuff, bracers of defence & a 2H weapon of your choice. If you’re willing to brave Raphael & Ansur this build becomes a powerhouse with the gauntlets of hill giant strength, amulet of health & Baldurans giantslayer. These items are incredible but are also locked behind fights which pose the highest risk to your run, prepare carefully and if you don't feel confident enough then don’t be ashamed to just skip them. Anyway we take wild heart bear because being resistant to everything but psychic damage is really underrated. You can use this character to abuse the poor souls that your swords bard has been using hold person on for easy crits. Make sure to *always* use reckless attack. Initially it sounds bizarre but stick with me, you want enemies to have advantage against your barb, doing this while keeping your AC capped around 17~19 means the computer always prioritises attacking your Barb over the rest of your party (all your other characters should have AC19-23ish by act 2). Not to mention if you’re always using reckless attack, the feat Great Weapon Master no longer has a downside, so it becomes a reliable +10 to damage.
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**Final note for builds:**
As you’ve probably noticed, yes almost everybody in the party takes a dip in fighter for access to action surge & shield proficiency. [I learned this habit from Colby like everything else I know. He’s the Bob Ross of DnD builds and well worth your time.](https://youtube.com/@DnDDeepDive?si=mvqyEwBZMR3WhU-v)
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General Advice

The most important factor in honour mode is “meta knowledge”, This means things like: knowing how to enter each combat effectively, making sure everyone is in a good position before starting, knowing exactly which enemies/spells you’ll face during that fight and ensuring you always take the enemy by surprise to gain a free turn. Being properly prepared is better than any build. As for difficulty, Act 1 is always going to be your biggest challenge so use plenty of rests and pick your fights carefully. For this guide I also recommend using your bard to persuade the act 2 bosses into committing suicide.

Do’s:

* Always have a these spells prepared: longstrider, aid, enhance ability, bless, misty step, heroes feast, counterspell, shield & guidance.
* Buy the ring of bless from Volo the moment you meet him at the grove.
* Steal Laezel’s armor at the start if you’re not using her, it’s great medium armor in the first few hours.
* Let Volo take your eye for a permanent see invisibility buff.
* Barbarian should always use reckless attack
* Buy & craft every potion of speed you can get your grubby mitts on. With the slight nerfs to Haste in HM potions of speed are a safer alternative.
* Take the Hag hair +1dex for swords bard and most the time just let Ethel have Mayrina, its fiddly to control who Ethel will offer the deal to so just go in being prepared to sacrifice Mayrina.
* Talk to crusher outside the goblin camp and persuade him to kiss your feet. He'll run off embaressed, follow him to the bridge away from all the other goblins. Now you can safely and easily kill him to loot his ring which increases movement speed.
* Use your party face to poison the goblin camp in act 1, killing over half of them outside before even entering combat and then the party face can simply deny everything.
* Look up the wiki page for every boss and check their legendary resistances/actions BEFORE starting the encounter. Ethel, inquisitor w’wargaz, cazador, steel watch titan & Nether brain specifically can do some seriously nasty stuff that’s exclusive to HM & can easily catch you off guard.
* Kill Balthazar in his room/lab where you first meet him. To make the fight even easier you can take flesh into the self same trial using the bell so you don’t have to fight him alongside Balthazar. Either way it’s a much easier than the fighting in the shadowfell.
* Take alert if someone has a spare feat available, otherwise increasing your main ability score is usually the best bet.
* Cast sanctuary on Isobel during the raid on the last light in, a lot easier than chasing after her trying to heal & blade ward her. Alternatively ignore her altogether, go straight to ambush against the drider, grab the lantern and release dolly dolly dolly, allowing you to skip the Isobel & Marcus’s fight altogether.
* Keep characters ability scores in even values when possible, odd values do not change anything (with a slight exception to constitution as odd values still give a little extra hp).
* Try to keep all characters at 12 Wis or higher to avoid being feared, charmed or hold person’d.
* Cast darkness over Halsins portal to prevent enemies attacking it.
* Take Gortash's deal to skip his fight & the steel foundry.
* Use minor illusion to group enemies together & pull them out of position before initiating combat. You can also use this method to fix broken NPC’s when they’re not standing where they’re meant to. Looking at you Alfira & Lakrissa.
* If you’re open to a little cheesing you can leave some ranged/throwing party members on the steps before the Grym boss fight. Now just rain hell down on the boss from safety.
* Globe of invulnerability is exactly as broken as it sounds. These scrolls restock daily at sorcerers sundries & trivialise every boss encounter in act 3. Ansur specifically has no way of countering this.
* Illithid powers. These wriggly little cuties are some of the strongest buffs/abilities available. I recommend having every possible party member take atleast: favourable beginnings, luck of the far realms, ability drain & cull the weak. If you opt to go half illithid then you get access to some outrageous kit such as: fly, psionic dominance, illithid expertise & blackhole.
* Summon any minions before casting Aid, Heroes feast, Longstrider & other morning buffs.
* Use your potions, elixirs & scrolls as much as possible. They’re literally everywhere & with good reason. A well timed potion of invisibility or scroll of misty step can save a run.
* Most people know this already but don’t forget you can throw healing potions at allies in a pinch.
* Before descending the stairs to Cazador’s fight have a party member go invisible. They can run over and free Astarion before rolling initiative. This method can also be used to free Volo, Mayrina, Aylin or set up smokepowder barrels for a one turn kill.
* Use darkness to cover any pickpocketing and then flee the area before the NPC notices they've been got.
* Only trade with vendors using your highest persuasion character.
* Give your frequently visited vendors a few hundred gold to max out their attitude. this way you have the best prices for both buying and selling.
* Remember you can skip the final fight altogether *using the dialogue option* (important distinction) to blow Gale up at the brain stem in act 3.

Don’ts:

* Don’t awaken at the Zaithisk unless you’re certain you can make the checks, there is a [great guide on respeccing for this exact moment](https://www.reddit.com/BaldursGate3/s/7uQ7MSzzBg) credit to u/kodiak3393.
*Don't use friends, guidance or *any* other spell when bargaining with Ethel for Mayrina & the hag hair. It will trigger Ethel's legendary action and prevent you from getting the hag hair.
* Don’t free Orpheus unless you're prepared to also fight the Emperor in the final fight.
* Don’t play as durge for the first time. Worth noting the cloak exclusive to durge is easily the best in the game but being durge throws the player some unexpected curveballs that can end a run if you're not prepared.
* Don’t keep sharpshooter toggled on permanenlty unless you’ve got risky ring or oil of accuracy.
* Don’t try & save the gondians, don’t go to the iron throne, do not pass go, do not collect £200
* Don’t underestimate Flind the and other Gnolls who are attacking Rugan in act 1, you ideally want to be level 4 before this fight. Ensure to start the encounter from insidde the cave where Rugan is trapped, it can be accessed from the area near the fake paladins of tyr & Karlach.
* Don’t use the cantrip Friends unless you plan on immediately leaving the area or killing the target.
* Don’t convince Ketheric to commit suicide at the mindlfayer colony. Instead use the first phase of the fight to get into position & takeout the Mindflayer asasp then get to work on the apostles. Makes phase 2 infinitely easier.
* Don’t talk to Wulbren or the Tieflings in the Moonrise prison *until* you’ve killed the warden and all the guards . These guards are utterly brain dead and somehow will never inform anyone upstairs of your massacre, regardless of how stealthily or raucously you tackle them. So just go hog wild. This’ll secure your potent robe with ease.
​
[Updated and streamlined version of the guide i made a few months ago on my old account u/JoseMongo]

I (24F) got coldly and suddenly discarded by my situationship (26M) after nearly a year of “dating” - how common is this and why does it happen?
How likely/common is it for a situationship you are dating to not care about you at all?
I just got dumped by my situationship after about 9 months of seeing each other weekly, texting multiple times a week, being intimate, going on trips and having really great times together.
I found out he was seeing other people, which is shit but acceptable as we “werent exclusive” (fair enough, but he also never mentioned or showed signs he was seeing others until I asked him out of the blue 6 months in) But he dumped me saying he’s “met someone he wants to try being serious with” and the way he did it was…really cold, in a very unexpected way. Especially since the hours preceding the dumping were great and we were having a normal time.
In your experience is it likely/possible that someone genuinely could not give less of a shit about you? Like, genuinely, the hugs, kisses on the forehead, the sex, the cuddles, the dates, the trips etc all meant…nothing?
Maybe if a guy (if any are lurking) can give perspective on this too? Because if it is true that someone could genuinely not give a shit at all and just pretend for nearly a year then…thats psychotic, and I cant comprehend it at all. Im a lover girl by heart, and I feel used and discarded when all I did was wear my heart on my sleeve. It breaks my heart that this is normalized and that people even get gaslit for feeling hurt and betrayed by this behavior since.
TL; DR - coldly dumped by situationship I was dating for 9 months. Is it really normal for people to genuinely not care about others after months of dating and getting to know someone?

The jealousy is never ending for me (32/F) and my husband (34/M).
It all started after college, we were going out, calling,texting and we have met each other's family. But there was no label and no sex. Until he got a new workmate and left me with no explanation or anything. Blocked my number and unfriended me on social media. That was 2012. I was on my best self before,the most patient and nicest woman you will ever meet.
2014, he came back. He pursued me again. Apologised for what he did. I accepted his apology but I knew a part of me changed. We got married after two years and together up until now but I cant trust him. Everytime I am opening topics regarding his exes and other women,he is non-commiting or really annoyed. He said it will just end up with a fight thats why he is not communicating properly.
He was keeping secrets that he gave few colleagues a lift home. Is it too hard to message your wife about it? Considering we have trust issue?
I have few girlfriends who's into a game. They encouraged us and said they will add us to their group.The moment he knew that and my friends will be coming into our house over the weekend,he kept logging in every 15-30 minutes to upgrade stuff and when I asked him why he is always on his phone - he said that he wants to have higher level than me. At the back of my mind, he is doing that to prove himself to my girlfriends.
I told him before that I dont trust him fully so I think it would be better to keep his distance with them. But I cannot see him doing that. I am trying to help him out but giving signal like going somewhere to pick up stuff but he is just staying there chatting endlessly with them. You got the time to chat with other woman but too tired to talk about our issues?
Lastly, I always have his back in front of our friends and at work. Whenever he is in trouble, I will do all the documentation and all. Whenever someone will comment something bad about him, I will defend him. But if it's me, I feel like I am carrying it all alone.
These are just recent issues but can you please advise me what to do. Im tired and it hurts. I feel like it is too easy for him to choose/please other people eventhough I will be the collatetal damage. Is it too hard to choose your wife? Please advise what to do and how to tackle things from here.

Hello, everyone!
After almost 2 months of "distro hopping" I finally found a place where I feel like home, literally feel like it was made for me, every detail seems to be perfect...
I have been using linux mint for almost 3 years now, I used it for 90% of my activities (and I literally only had windows for gaming, specially for VR)...
After some time I realized that steam was actually available for linux and I started looking that many of my games were available for linux and actually native (probably like 20 to 30% of them), I thought it would be nice to transfer my Linux into a bigger SSD, so I could split the games for linux in one SSD and the ones for Windows into another one...
Then I saw this little option in steam linux called: "make all games available" and I was surprised that I could actually run many of them, although I had no hope on running most of the games, I thought to myself it would be impossible to find a compatibility layer that made modern games work in Linux...
Eventually I noticed another little thing called "Proton" and saw that I can choose in the compatibility options multiple proton options, I saw that a huge amount of my games would run pretty well!
Afterwards, I tried enabling proton for some regular Linux-available games (like Cyberpunk 2077 and Howarts Legacy) that didn't run super well in regular linux (there was like stuttering or framerate drops, I couldn't really tell), but with Proton they would run even better than in Windows, it was amazing to see that!
Then I learned about two additional great applications: lutris and bottles (this was mostly because I had just installed 7th Heaven in Windows -The mod manager that can make the Classic Final Fantasy VII game look and feel absolutely stunning- and I wanted to give it a go in my Linux Mint), I followed an old tutorial on how to install the mod manager and I saw bottles, then I realized that there was another tool similar called Lutris (which was much better IMO, and it's my goto for any non steam game, specially for abandonware games, and it surprisingly runs games from like 20-30 years ago!)... I would use bottles mostly for mod managers and old puzzle games that I wanted to have in a single prefix (by the way, thanks to these two mod managers, I understood a lot about the world of prefixes and I was fascinated by it! With steam I never noticed this and with regular wine I had no idea how things worked, discovering Windows prefixes was like finding a brand new world!).
Later on, after having most of my games working on my Linux mint, I tried to run & make work every single possible "tricky" game, old and new (one example is paraworld, which literally took me an Hex modifier to make it work because of some weird port configuration, lol, that one would work in Linux, some other examples were games with the Easy Anti Cheat) and eventually made every single one of my games I tried to work (in total probably 200)...
However, the very last thing that was missing was to be able to play my VR games, and it was solely the reason to keep Windows in another partition (I was dumb enough to upgrade my windows 10 to 11, unfortunately), I started to look into the possibility on running a VR device on linux and discovered that the valve index was compatible with Linux, so, I thought in selling my HP Reverb G2, but because of it, I realized that Windows would actually TERMINATE COMPATIBILITY WITH WINDOWS MEDIA REALITY DEVICES AND DISABLE THE APPLICATION FOREVER! It was unreal for me, the worst kind of move I've ever seen in a corporation, even worse than Ubisoft taking away games you paid for, because this was a full fledged electronic device of hundreds (and in some cases thousands) of dollars...
At the same time, I made a post on reddit asking about VR in Linux and someone gave me some great advice about it and sent me a discord server link: "Linux VR Adventures", there I started to get into the rabbit hole about the VR possibilities in Linux, I statred looking for a great step by step tutorial to install Monado with Windows Mixed reality devices: I followed the tutorial and I succeeded! My linux Mint was able to use my VR headset as a display (and it can play properly VR 180 degree videos properly!).
However, that would only be the first part of the process: The second and hardest part would be to create a compatibility layer to either enhance or replace SteamVR itself (because, for some reason, SteamVR for Linux has a bug that closes the VR options and when they open again it says something like: "disabled Monado driver because on the last attempt, the application crashed", and I could never solve that problem, no matter what...
From the advice of my fellow reddit user as well, I tried to install Envision, which would be the tool to fix such problem by replacing SteamVR, but it was no use, this would be my first stopper in my Linux journey: unfortunately Envision required either Ubuntu 23 (The latest version of Mint is based on Ubuntu 22) or other more up to date kernel (i.e. latest arch or fedora), I spent probably the whole night trying to make envision work by compiling manually & installing dozens of packages because some dependency libraries required certain version of another and they piled up until the point I had to go to a very low level...
After all of that, I finally made envision work but when trying to create my VR profile, it showed me a weird error about my VR headset that I could never sort out, it was very frustrating but I knew it was time to give up and try something new...
So, what I did is to install Arch to replace Windows for good, it was probably one of the best decisions of my life, I would get rid of Windows forever, after 25 years or so using it, would be a semi-radical change, but I knew it was time: VR used to be the only reason to cling to them but if Windows was going to get rid of its flagship app & brick its devices, it had to go! (Plus I started to look about the multiple controversies about Windows 11 like the ads in the start menu and more recently the issue about Bitlocker, I have hated Windows & Microsoft for the better part of my life as well), it was simply time for a change!
After a couple hours I managed to install Arch and it was surprisingly great! I installed it alongside KDE Plasma 6 and I was astonished on how beautiful it looked and how many desktop effects, cursors, themes, login greeters, etc., I could use, it was my first time using KDE after only using Cinnamon and Gnome...
Then I tried installing steam on my Arch and everything ran very smoothly, I think I installed a couple of libraries but it was almost plug and play, games felt even running better than in Mint! However, Arch had a few issues that I couldn't ignore: the first one was an audio driver bug: I couldn't sort it out and my optical output wouldn't work (I didn't bother to fix it that much because I still had mint when I needed to use my optical output); the second issue wasn't much of an Arch's problem but it kinda turned me down: sddm and its multiple problems in the login greeters (I installed a few of them and when I tried to login the next time I had a black screen for no reason, the only way to login back was to login in mint and modify manually the config files for sddm in another partition, and then someone in reddit gave advice on how to start kde plasma without sddm and voila! it worked, only a singular sddm theme worked in the end but I was content with it). And the third and most important issue for me: a bunch of things that I needed to install manually that I already took for granted: a folder browser, a folder compression file, a text editor, etc. (I know the general purpose of Arch is to be as minimalist and customizable as possible, but for me it was a bit tedious, specially adding the right click actions in the config files for some apps, it made things unecessarily complicated for my liking)...
Eventually I got a barebones gaming laptop and I asked in reddit if it would be better to install either Fedora or Debian for gaming: most people recommended me Fedora and I got excited about it: I installed the Fedora Workstation edition and it worked like a charm in everything! Fedora would be specially useful for me because I'm a developer and I've seen everywhere that this is probably the best System for Developers (and I also noticed that it has the best compatibility with some technologies like Oracle, which would be great, because I was never able to install Oracle in my linux mint, I worked mostly with .NET, Angular and I would start with python and Docker as well)...
However, I liked both, Fedora and KDE so much that I wanted to see if I could get Fedora AND KDE in my main computer, I made a hard decision on replacing Arch for the Fedora 40 KDE version, and I was very excited to look into it!
BUT, there were a number of issues I experienced with this new Fedora KDE: the first one was that the KDE effects (one of the main reasons I chose this particular system) were kinda broken, sometimes they worked, sometimes they didn't, they were like slower than in arch and had some of the options disabled (like the little colors you can use in the hexagon "burn my window" effect to open and close windows), and in general it felt slower than Arch, sddm didn't work either, I didn't know if it was because Fedora 40 just came a few days ago and KDE Plasma 6 wasn't fully compatible yet or what happened, but I was willing to accept this, as long as my games worked...
The second and most important issue is that I couldn't make most of my steam games to work I tried to look what I was missing, I installed ProtonUpQt and a bunch of libraries but it was no use, something was wrong but I couldn't pinpoint what was it...
Then I remembered that in the reddit post I made, someone recommended me Nobara (because it was a Fedora Fork, mostly adapted for gaming, developed by Mr. Glorious Eggroll himself, with everything out of the box to make it plug and play for games) and I decided to give it a go...
After making the live cd, I noticed that KDE worked much better (I think the latest version of Nobara still uses Fedora 39 & Plasma KDE 5 but because of that it's a bit more stable?), I installed it into my system and started customizing everything like crazy! I also tried sddm and it also failed, however, it at least allowed me to login from a black screen (rather than not allowing me a login, like in Arch), I decided to ditch sddm in favor of LightDM and it was probably for the best, since I've used LightDM in Mint for years and I knew exactly how to configure and customize it, and it never broke!
After adapting the system to my liking, I noticed that everything I would want is already installed: a good web browser, ProtonUpQt, Steam, Lutris, there's even a tool for Xbox controller drivers, it was crazy to me to see all of this, plus everything on top of a Fedora system that would allow me to work on my software development projects.
Then the real final test would come: how good does it run steam games? I tried at least 50 of my most recent games and all of them ran flawlessly! I didn't have to install anything, all came up first try, no issues! The next step would be to see if Lutris still ran the games that I could run in Mint and: it did: I copied every prefix that I have in Mint to my Nobara Lutris and they worked the exact same way! Everything looked perfect!
The Very last step would be to immerse myself into the VR world that I still left pending, however, I haven't tried the VR installation steps yet but I was able to download & run the AppImage of envision and run it (unlike mint, where I had to compile it manually, not without the nightmare of compiling & updating all the dependencies as well)... I looked that open composite was another possibility for this and I would try either of them alongside Monado eventually (I haven't done it yet because I had to travel but once I'm back, I'll 100% do it!).
At this point I'm mostly convinced about replacing Mint for good and take advantage of all my hard drives: I have Nobara in a 1tb nvme m2 and mint in a 4tb regular SATA ssd, I could use that mint drive as an additional ssd for games or something, it doesn't make so much sense to have a dual boot of systems that do mostly the same (Nobara being the superior one in multiple ways, of course), I was willing to have Arch dual booted with Mint because Arch had better compatibility with VR but for me it was very hard to think about Arch as my main and only system, for all the issues that I mentioned before), but now I definitely found a place where I want to stay, a place I can call home, and I feel very excited for having this great system and the future things I'll do in it!

I https://www.reddit.com/UKPersonalFinance/s/0bwVWkt0F5
I previously made thread about this ( see link above) and have enquired with work regarding increasing contributions.
Here's what work have said :
"we operate a Relief at Source pension scheme, therefore pension deductions are made after tax has been deducted. The tax relief is then applied where your personal contribution is reduced by 20%, which is then claimed back , from HMRC and invested directly into your pension pot. If you are a higher rate taxpayer, you will then need to claim the additional 20% tax relief via a Self Assessment form"
Is the above a simple thing to do and gives me same benefits that it's worth increasing pension contributions? Thanks

That's how my texts feel 😊 Hahaha maybe not right away, but I'd love to be that for you!! I'm 25 years old and from California! I'm looking for friends as I work from home so I've got way too much time to myself! Why not stop by and get a new pocket bestie? I'm the ultimate hype man who can banter like no others :p A little about me!
• I like music - Doesn't everyone? A couple of my favorites are Frank Ocean, Joji, Kendrick Lamar, Mac Miller, Queen, Bruno Mars, and MCR!
• I reeeaally like music. I sing decently enough. I mean the neighbors haven't asked if anything is dying and my shampoo bottles in the shower haven't complained either. I also play guitar, piano, bass, ukulele, clarinet, and am learning accordion! Kinda random assortment but I love trying new things! Wanna hear a cover of your favorite song??
• I game. On PS5 and Switch! I like the Sims 4, Fortnite, Persona, Pokemon, and want to try out Stardew finally!
• I work from home. I love my career. I worked really hard to get here and it gives me a lot more free time at home! That means more attention for you!!
• I'm patient! We all have lives. It won't hurt my feelings if you disappear for a bit.
• I'm supportive! Usually considered the parent of a friend group just because I'm the one people go to either to vent or for advice! If you need a shoulder to lean on, I've got two!
That's about it really. This post is already super long. I've got a few other interests like baseball, crafting, geocaching, cooking, and wasting too much time on YouTube or TikTok! If you just need good company, send me a message 😊