I don't get people, and people don't get me. It feels like every time I think I have a grasp on social etiquette, I'm smacked down for doing or saying something I didn't realize was wrong. I try so carefully to word things in such a way that I communicate clearly and unambiguously, but it is inevitable that I will say something or behave in a way that upsets someone when I was just trying to participate in a conversation. Yes, there are times where I'm being intentionally terse, angry, etc, but I'm talking about the people with whom I make an active effort to never show that side of me.
I'm so tired. Constantly analyzing, crafting, and pruning my speech takes an enormous amount of mental energy for me, and it winds up blowing up in my face anyways. It feels futile, like I'll never be able to get to a point where I'm understood. When people explain to me what I did wrong, I just don't get it. I create new rules in my head to apply going forward, but they don't make sense to me, and I don't understand WHY I need to follow this new rule.
I'm burned out. I wish I didn't have social needs. I wish I could separate myself from the world and be happy, but I can't. I crave social interaction but wind up miserable every time I dip my toe in the water only to have it bitten off by the gator I didn't see lurking under the surface. There's another part of me that wishes I was more obviously autistic so people would be more forgiving with me, but the problem is that I'm just "normal" enough to pass as such until you get to know me, and people don't like to get to know me because I'm fucking weird.
This is a curse I'll never be rid of. I'm fundamentally broken and everyone winds up labeling me an asshole at some point. My relationships with people are always temporary. There is no one in my life now who was a part of it ten years ago. I'm completely unlikable in the long term, and it's just a matter of time before I step in shit again and lose even more people. 35 years of this shit. I'm not even halfway done with life and I'm staring at the mountain of years ahead of me already out of breath.

I called out a girl (Taiwanese-Australian) for being a racist on Tiktok and then she fake cried as a response. She even made a video saying that if you agree with me, a Japanese guy, you are a weeb. Which sounds pretty racist.
Anyway, because of that I got tons of racist comments, and one of them was from a Malaysian guy in his late 30s. After blocking him, he then left the same racist comment (saying "I'm faking my accent") on my video:
This is What "Diverse Society" Looks Like
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WSCE9hm88OM
I decided this was a good chance to promote my video on here but... I also wanted to say that if someone leaves a racist comment online, they could either be an insecure teen or an insecure adult that's still not OK with his race even in his late 30s. That being said, it would be nice if social media sites do take racism against mixed people more seriously.

I have a stable, 9-5 job that pays the bills nicely, so I'm not desperate for cash or anything. However, I am starting to get very discouraged at the business side of my art journey. I have paid for several classes and a couple mentorships under well known artists. My skills aren't at a studio level of perfection yet, but I would like to think I'm good enough to get paid for it by now. I've been studying hard for the past 4 years and impressed a few professional artists with my overall growth.
But I still can't seem to get any commission work. Not from friends, not from family, not from internet acquaintances, not from random people looking up my art on social media. Just completely dry. There were 3 opportunities where someone I knew online messaged me looking for some artwork to be made, but after we agreed to what it was going to be and the price, they went silent about the project. When I contacted them again about the artwork they all told me they decided not to have the work done. 3 people in 4 years showed interest and just dropped it before I even made one sketch. These weren't just random people either, I still have contact with them today, we still talk online.
Even though I have a decent 9-5, I'm gonna start feeling the squeeze soon. I just had my first child 2 weeks ago. He is a bundle of chaos and joy for me. I love every minute I spend with my son, but my wife isn't able to go full time back to work for 7 months. I am confident that my employer will help me out (they said as much) but I always pride myself on standing on my own two feet. I really want to supplement my extra baby costs with what little I can make doing commission work part time for individuals.
Is there a secret sauce I don't know about? Am I in an "art desert" part of the United States where no one gives a crap about DnD character illustrations? I have handed out many business cards at this point and made some promising connections online, but still nothing.
I'm not asking for much, just a job every month or two that can get me an extra $60, but whatever I am doing is totally not working. Is it the communities? I frequent ArtStation, DeviantART, and Reddit, looking for clients. If you guys all moved somewhere else to find commissions I would like to know the address. The money squeeze is coming soon and I don't want to make the decision between bacon or diapers on my next grocery run. I would like both, please.
Again, I am not desperate, just starting to feel my finances slip away a little. If I can live comfortably doing my two jobs (9-5 and an art freelancer) I will take that, but I'll also survive without the extra income. Though, I've spent too much of my life just "surviving." I would like to thrive at some point, and I want my art to be what opens the door.
So, with all that said, does anyone have any tips for getting small commission work? Locally, online, I don't really care, as long as it can land me at least one small job, which would be more than I've gotten in the past half decade. Not posting my portfolio on this subreddit because I'm not looking to advertise here, just wanting advice on getting a commission based business going. I post my portfolio to places where I'm looking for clients.

The "Hippie Trail" was an overland backpacking route that ran from Western Europe to India, Nepal and Thailand, travelled by thousands of people from North America and Western Europe from the mid-1950s until 1979, when the Islamic Revolution in Iran and the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan.
Players would be in control of a party of travellers heading from the UK on this journey in a VW-type van, having to:

• Manage money - and exchange it!
• Make sure the members are fed, watered and healthy.
• Deal with the various requests from the party to go to various places or get certain souvenirs.
• Make sure there's enough petrol in the tank and the vehicle is in good condition, especially as garages get harder to come by going further east.
• Obtain visas and deal with bureaucrats, some of whom will want bribes.

The goal would be to get to Kathmandu with as many points as possible, based on:

• Souvenirs
• Money left
• Happiness of the party
• Other achievements.

You would travel between various cities along the way with multiple routes to choose. From example - do you do the direct and cheaper route through central Yugoslavia or the scenic route down the coast? Which way do you go through Türkiye?
Money could be made by:

• Working in bars or other places.
• Buying and selling goods across borders... including illegal ones. You run the risk of getting your vehicle searched at the border crossings.
• Completing various quests in the cities.
• Donating blood.

There would be dangers and challenges along the way like:

• Bandits, who you will have to deal with. Possibly in a minigame.
• Dangerous animals, like tigers and snakes.
• Road crashes,
• Someone having a bad reaction to some drugs,
• An argument with the locals that turns violent - and the police take their side!
• Someone insults the local dictator and gets arrested.
• A member ending up being wanted by the authorities. Do you hand them over or try to smuggle them out of the country?
• Being caught smuggling - can you get your party member out of prison?
• The weather - like being snowed in on an Afghan pass.
• Various diseases, including dysentery.
• A woman wants to you to help her escape an arranged marriage - what do you do?

You would also not have access to modern mobile phones - you'd need to find a telephone or post office to send telegrams.
Characters would not die, but they would be incapacitated enough for their adventure to end.
I am personally thinking this would look good in a pixel-art style, myself. I like the idea of a cute pixel youth hostel or Greek beach.

Okay so a few things before I get us started! First, sorry if this sort of thing has been done before. this list is actually crazy hard when you start thinking about it, and it is definitely subject to change constantly, so don’t take it too seriously! Genuinely interested to see what people put. Kendrick has such a range of sounds and themes that it means someone might love Kendrick for completely different reasons to yourself.
anyway, IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
PRIDE
LUST
BLOW MY HIGH
DIE HARD
THESE WALLS
WESLEYS THEORY
GOOD KID MAAD CITY
MONEY TREES
I
FEEL

Heya! I posted this in /SanJose as well, but you happen to be in or around the South Bay, here are some fun things that are happening around here this week:

Thursday, 5/16

• Off The Grid Night Market Gordon Biersch (357 E. Taylor St., San Jose) 5-9 p.m. FREE Groove to music from San Jose Jazz while you sample over 50+ food trucks and brews at the inaugural event. (Runs through 7/11)
  
• Bay to Breakers Shakeout Sunnyvale Bay Trail (293-327 W. Caribbean Dr., Sunnyvale) 6 p.m. FREE Don your Bay to Breakers gear and run, jog, or walk to your own pace at this running series.
  
• Dwight Clark Legacy Series California Theater (345 S. First St., San Jose) 7 p.m. $30-$287 Along with lively conversations with current and former 9ers players, NBC Sports hosts a presentation of the Dwight Clark Awards.
  
• Drink and Draw Art Boutiki (44 Race St., San Jose) 7 p.m. FREE Bring out your inner artiste while you sip on a tasty beverage and enjoy the sound of Digging Sound Collect. Crayons, paper, pencils, and other utensils provided.
  
• Chris Porter San Jose Improv (62 S. Second St., San Jose) Thu 8 p.m., Fri 7:30 + 9:45 p.m., Sat 7 p.m. + 9:30 p.m. $22-$72 From NBC’s “Last Comic Standing,” and his Netflix special “Ugly and Angry,” this comedian has distinguished himself as a no-frills, no-sound cues, no puppets performer. (Runs through 5/18)
  
• Austin Nasso Rooster T Feathers Comedy Club (Address) Thu-Fri 8 p.m., Sat-Sun 7 p.m. $25 Admission, $35 VIP You may know this former Microsoft software engineer from his recurring appearances on “The Howard Stern Show.” (Runs through 5/19)
  
• Pressure Drop DJ Night Caravan Lounge (98 S. Almaden Ave., San Jose) 9 p.m. FREE Join DJs Norbert + Fuchsia for a night of punk, ska, reggae, soul, and R&B.
  

Friday, 5/17

• Salsa y Cerveza Garden at the Flea (1590 Berryessa Rd., San Jose) 5-9 p.m. FREE Learn to Salsa dance and browse flea market deals while you groove to Union Timbera and gnosh on bites from local food trucks.
  
• Movie Night in the Park: “Puss in Boots: The Last Wish” Meadowfair Park (Corda Dr. + Barberry Ln., San Jose) 6-10 p.m. FREE Bring your blanket + lawn chair, and enjoy lawn games, crafts, and food trucks as you watch one of the coolest, most stylish animated films from last year.
  
• SJBP - Bikers of the Caribbean Ride! Berryessa BART Station (958 Berryessa Station Way, San Jose) 7:30 p.m. FREE Dress like a pirate, or wear your street gear to join other bike enthusiasts for a 15-20 mile ride through North San Jose.
  
• Bay FC vs San Diego Wave FC PayPal Park (1123 Coleman Ave., San Jose) 7:30 p.m. $20-$196 After losses on the road to Chicago and Portland, our team returns home for a “Bay Area Unite” game.
  
• Sofia Niño de Rivera California Theater (345 S. First St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $49-$109 You may know this comedian as Mexico City’s “Woman of the Year” 2016, or from the Netflix dramedy “Club de Cuervos.”
  
• Dark Satellite + Orbit 17 + Dear Banshee Art Boutiki (44 Race St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $15 Advance, $20 Day of Show Bay Area indie rockers collide at a stellar showcase of prog, jazz, and otherworldly riffage.
  
• Alicia Villarreal San Jose Civic (135 W. San Carlos St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $39.50-$149 See the two-time Latin Grammy Award-winning singer for her “Donde Todo Comenzo” tour.
  
• Electric Feels: Indie Rock + Indie Dance Party The Ritz (400 S. First St., San Jose) 9 p.m. $15-$20 Advance, $25 Day of Show From MGMT to Vampire Weekend, alt-J to Hot Chip, dance along to your favorite indie tracks from yesteryear.
  
• Panacea + HRIF + Perarez Caravan Lounge (98 S. Almaden Ave., San Jose) 9 p.m. FREE Chunky riffs, ear-splitting growls, and dense-packed crowds fill one of the most intimate venues in the South Bay.
  

Saturday, 5/18

• Bored Teachers Comedy Tour California Theater (345 S. First St., San Jose) 3 p.m. and 7 p.m. $35-$55 Ring in the end of the school year with the No. 1 teacher comedians in the world performing skits and stand ups.
  
• Culture Night Market Discovery Meadow (180 Woz Way, San Jose) 4-10 p.m. FREE Featuring local vendors, food trucks, and businesses, to hoppin’ stage performances from Universal Grammar, Los Jefes, L James, Thatfool Al, Sutro, DJ Say, and Real Ignorant.
  
• All Out for Al-Nakba San Jose Peace and Justice Center (48 S. Seventh St., San Jose) 4 p.m. FREE Join community members and activists for a screening and discussion of Al Jazeera’s “Al-Nakba: The Palestinian Catastrophe 1948” documentary series as a part of Anti-War Action Network’s national week of action.
  
• Hey Girl! Sexy Slumber Party Splash Video Dance Bar (65 Post St., San Jose) 6 p.m. FREE before 7:30, $10 after Dress in your best pajamas or sexy sleepwear and dance along with fellow fems, femmes, and femme fatales to the tunes of local DJ Rogue Mermaid.
  
• Nate Jackson San Jose Civic (135 W. San Carlos St., San Jose) 7 p.m. $39.50-$200 You know he has to be funny, because his tour’s called the “Super Funny World Tour.” It’s just science.
  
• The ABBA Concert Experience Montgomery Theater (271 S. Market St., San Jose) 7:30 p.m. $39-$59 This family-friendly singalong show highlights the enduring success of one of the world’s most beloved pop supergroups.
  
• San Jose Earthquakes vs. Orlando City SC PayPal Park (1123 Coleman Ave., San Jose) 7:30 p.m. $22-$185 Join the Quakes for Vietnamese Heritage night, with special merch for sale, and limited items with purchase of a ticket.
  
• Take on Me: The Ultimate 80’s Party The Ritz (400 S. First St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $17-$20 Advance, $20 Day of Show Don your favorite hot pants and pastel colors for this celebration of synths and gated reverb drums.
  
• Nineteen Jazz Orchestra Art Boutiki (44 Race St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $25 Advance, $30 Day of Show Along with classic soul, jazz, and R&B, this local professional jazz group will be performing “Obama Suite,” composed by their their former trumpet player, the late Eric Bolvin.
  
• Nature of the Beast SJZ Break Room (310 S. First St., San Jose) 8 p.m. $25 Bay Area jazz legends return to the SJZ stage to perform select songs from Herbie Hancock’s discography.
  
• Dead River Rebels + American Standard + Akira XX Caravan Lounge (98 S. Almaden Ave., San Jose) 9 p.m. FREE DIY punk meets stoner rock at this showcase of local talent.
  

Sunday, 5/19

• Boogie Music Fest Downtown Campbell 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Sunday FREE Admission Enjoy food, beer, and wine, plus artisan booths, a kids zone, and a funky “Best Dressed” contest, with live music on two stages both days.
  
• AAPI Pride Brunch Holiday Inn San Jose - Silicon Valley (1350 N. First St., San Jose) 11 a.m.-3 p.m. FREE Celebrate Asian American Pacific Islander History Month with local drag performers, poetry, Mahjong, and trivia games.
  
• Halfway to Halloween Rumble City Boxing (866 Park Ave., San Jose) 2-6 p.m. FREE From spooky wares to Halfoween artistry, check out local artist booths with live music and food.
  
• Homayoun Shajarian + Anoushiravan Rohani San Jose Civic (135 W. San Carlos St., San Jose) 5 p.m. and 9 p.m. Two legendary performers, one from Tehran and the other from Iran, blend Eastern and Western musical traditions.
  
• Jakob’s Castle + The Happys The Ritz (400 S. First St., San Jose) 7 p.m. $15 Advance, $20 Day of Show SoCal rock and ska royalty Jacob Nowell brings his sublime punk sensibilities to the stage.
  
• Sammy Obeid San Jose Improv (62 S. Second St., San Jose) 8:30 p.m. $30-$90 One of my favorite comedians of all time, Sammy’s been a part of the Bay Area comedy scene for the past two decades. Check out some of his bits on Instagram/TikTok!
  

Thanks so much for reading!

You can get this entire post emailed to you each week in my newsletter.
If you have other stuff you’d like people to know about, drop ‘em in the comments! 🙂

• Gregg

Hey guys, I recently passed my series 66 and wanted to share a bit about what I encountered. I had STC as my vendor and i did a lot of practice finals. I was a little worried because I was scoring exactly 70% and sometimes 67/68, but I did the final with show answer explanation. There were some questions (about 5 on average) that i would get wrong simply because I misread the question but in reality i should've chosen the correct answer. Try to not memorize answers and understand why you got that answer wrong. The actual exam was easier for me than the practice tests. I also recommend to supplement the areas of weakness with series 7 guru and capital advantage on Youtube! super helpful!
Remember to RTFQ, take your time (don't rush) and understand what it is asking you. Usually you can narrow it down between 2 answer choices but you must select the response that is MOST fitting/correct. I can recall the times I've made mistakes on my practice exams is due to not fully understanding the question.
Now here's what I encountered on the exam.

• Prohibited/unethical practices came up A LOT, so did questions about USA and state vs federal registration (office vs no office/ x clients). It is super critical to know differences between BD and IA and the registration requirements for federal and state. Be familiar with churning, reverse churning, selling away, breakpoint (1 question), painting the tape, etc.
  • BD/agents and IA/IAR
  • Make sure to watch Dean Tinney's video about USA and federal vs state registration.
  • Note: the exam is subtle they will give answer choices that are not 100% obvious, for example i remember an answer choice with "mutual funds" or something like that which basically means its an investment company and is exempt from registration.
  • they did have I,II, III, IV format for a few questions but not all
• Investment company act/investment companies. I had a question about open vs closed, which is an easy one if you know what they each are and their differences.
• For the formulas know the concept and how the formula works and what they contain. I did not have to pull out my calculator but knowing the formula helped (i.e. p/e ratio, p/b ratio, NPV, future & present value). I had a couple questions on Modern Portfolio Theory, CAPM, and standard deviation.
  • Definetely know current assets and current liabilities
  • balance sheet vs income statement
  • fundamental and technical analysis were both on the exam
  • some risk identifying questions (business risk, market risk etc)
  • type of portfolio (i.e. sector rotation was on there)
• Definetely know customer accounts and what makes them different (joint tenants in common vs joint with survivor), know the different business types (limited partner, c corp, LLC etc.).
• Know the differences between the types of life insurance (whole, universal, term etc) and similarly the differences between annuities. Remember a variable annuity is a security.
• Know prospectus requirements (like when its required etc)
• Defintely know about retirement accounts (IRA, Roth etc)
• I had 1 question about Coverdell asking about max contribution
• There was 1 or 2 option question but it was about strategy (i.e. hedge)
• There was 1 question about "which of these is a security" (exempt security & exempt transaction know those)
• Know about exemptions for registration, i had a question "which of these would be exempt from registration"?
• i had couple questions about solicitors

That's it from what i can recall. i hope this information helps you in your studying journey. Remember to take breaks and believe in yourself. YOU CAN DO IT! Best of luck!

I was initially only planning on having a photographer but now the idea of having some moments captured on video is really appealing to me. But, the usual videographer highlight reels are not what I'm looking for - the quality of the footage is great and all but I just want to be able to capture raw moments from the day at a reasonable cost.

1. I've thought about QR codes for google drive links and various photo apps but I'm worried people are not going to use them/take videos (seeing as how so many of our guests can barely respond to an rsvp question about a song they like, I'm doubtful about them interacting with other elements at the reception). Have people gone this route? Did you get the photos/videos you were hoping for?
   
2. Did any of you enlist specific friends/family to help capture moments? How did you go about doing it? I think I could reasonably have someone press record during the ceremony but I'm also thinking about first dance, speeches, etc. I don't want to burden anyone/a handful of people with this task but also don't want them to forget to capture a moment.
   
3. Are there "content creators" who just take photos and videos but offer pricing where they don't create all the social media content?
   

Thanks in advance!

Hi everyone,
so I'm currently on my first reread of both books while listening to the fantasy fangirls podcast (still in the FW discussions) and reading a ton of theories. I've got one myself which I would like to share. If the following text outlining how I got to my conclusions is too long for you, there is a TL;DR at the bottom.
So one theory that I saw multiple times and that I strongly believe in, is that not all dragons are good and all venin are evil per default. Sure, it *might* be this simple. But I can't imagine a) the whole setup in IF and especially its end building up to a problem that is resolved simply by >! Xaden trying not turn evil while they're trying to find an antidote for venin-ism !<. It just feels a little too one dimensional for what we've been set up to expect in this series tbh. b) Rebecca closing herself off to a lot of mind blowing possibilities and aspects to discuss by making it this black and white. Which as far as I have seen isn't really her thing. We're here for all the nuances and twists she's giving us.
So let's assume that it is NOT this black and white and there is room for good in venin and bad in dragons and let's take this thought a little further. It has some very interesting implications.
First off, there is a parallel to the perception of Navarre and Poromiel and the conflict between both regions. The whole population of Navarre and we as readers (at least in the beginning) were set up to believe, that Poromiel is this enemy that wants to hurt Navarre just because they are bad - and nothing more really. But we learned that this perception is just propaganda and not exactly true, Poromiel has a lot of good (and self preserving) reasons to attack Navarre and there are a lot of good reasons to actually see Navarre as the bad guy. But as long as you are convinced of the propaganda and don't learn of Poromiel's POV, your perception of the evilness of Poromiel will be confirmed over and over again (imagine being in an outpost protecting the border and getting attacked by griffin fliers. Of course they will appear evil to you). So with the conflict between Navarre and Poromiel, we have seen that narrative is essential to the perception of good and evil of two sides in a fight. And that there can be some Massive blind spots once you buy into a given (and skewed) narrative.
I think we might be given the same treatment concerning venin in the next books. For now they are the (capital T) enemy. But we honestly don't know much about their motives other than 'need for power' and mostly accept the first information and impressions we get about venin as truth. Venin and their motivations are introduced to Violet and the reader via folklore though, which is notoriously known for exaggeration and simplification and usually does not concern itself with nuance and the question, under which circumstances something that might be dangerous actually IS dangerous and whether there are just motives to perceived evil actions. Further on we learn that similar stories to the one in Violet's book are known in a lot of Navarrian regions (especially at the border), which are also dragon dominated (dragon positivity - yay) regions. So it's safe to say, that the narration aligns with the perspective of the dragons. This goes for Violet's 'the fables of the Barren' as much as the stories that are spread verbally along the regions. And this is the center of my theory.
I belive that venin are not good or evil per se, but I believe that they are (or have become) the mortal enemies of dragons. This I think is safe to assume. After all, their breeding grounds are full of magic and we know, that venin crave it. So they seem to be an imminent threat to the dragons' habitat and offspring. But why do venin want this power? Is it really just for power's sake? Might there be some self-preserving motives? We don't know. But what we know, is that humans believing in the simple 'channeling from earth (where the magic of hatching grounds is and little ones might be in danger) = bad' and 'channeling from the sky (where humans are dependent on dragons) = good' is a very safe and convenient thing for dragons. So they might have a vast interrest in humans believing this. Everything Violet (and therefore we as readers) learn is from the dragon side of conflict. But what if people vs venin is just another Navarre vs Poromial type of conflict and the propaganda we know of just a small part of a larger conspiracy of the dragons not wanting people to have power that they can't really keep in check? What if venin/people channeling from the ground weren't evil once but dragons got them to the brink of extincion because they did not want humans to have power without depending on them and now the venin are fighting back as hard as they can to secure their lives or something else that is worth dying for to them? Something the dragons threatened in their need for sole control over power? What if they don't crave power for power's sake but as a way to ensure their future? What if channeling from the earth is only corrupting the soul when driven to its extreme and could be performed safely with the right intentions, but wielders have been driven to the extreme by the fight the dragons brought to them? I could see a version of the fables of the Barrens, where the dragons somehow convince humans that channeling from the earth is evil and corrupting as a way to restrict the power of independent humans and to secure themselves the place at the top of the foodchain while surpressing their percieved enemies harshly and with deadly consequences.
Thanks for bearing with me. I hope this makes sense and I would love to hear your thoughts about this.
TL;DR: Venin being ultra evil in nature is basically propaganda from the dragons to help their interrests and there might be very justified reasons for all the bad stuff venin do.

Does anyone still take clients out for impromptu golf? I was given a card from an engineer I know and was told to take his boss out golfing. I guess the last guy I worked for did that. Now there's some concerns I have about all this:

• I have a set of clubs but I'm not good
• Do you do this during the working day, or over the weekend?
• Do most people do a full 18 holes, or is 9 holes standard?
• If it's during the working day, are you drinking?
• Will it come off phony if i'm not actually good at this?
• Do I need a membership or something to a club?
• My company is just me, so do I find 3 full people for a 4some or do I go as just two of us?

DMs welcome.

I'm a pretty respectable DPS and have played several classes (mainly rogue) at end game throughout my WoW career, but I have only ever DPS'd. Due to guild needs and a little sense of adventure, I want to start tanking and/or healing occasional keys and maybe push into raiding. My concern is I have never done it. I don't have even a base understanding, I don't know the best way to manage aggro on adds, or how to quickly swap focus heals in a group if someone starts taking heavy damage.
Is there a go-to guide that people recommend watching, or a youtube video/channel? Something that can cover from step 1 addons, keybinds, the whole 9 yards to at least get me comfortable enough to start pushing some low end content? Thank you guys very much.

(F) (In my twenties) (Trigger warning: mentions violence)
Hello, I'm posting this as I am in a lot of pain, I feel as though I've got to put a brave face on all of the time because if I break down I may not get back up. I need somewhere I can just vent and talk and not worry about my face being seen or if my parts are seen. There's so much going on in my life right now... I've had thoughts that I would be better off not here at times and that nobody understands the pain...
Backstory: I was an independent woman who enjoyed my own company and lived in a house in the countryside alone for 6-7 years. During this time my system was functioning, I could switch appropriately, hide if I wanted to hide and so on and so forth. I did isolate myself quite a bit. I enjoyed my company, my alters helped me to understand and we communicated well. I was not ashamed of my name. The hosts name. My birth name was not something I hid from people.
I met my husband - He was working in a job I admired. He was seemingly charming and genuine, who opened me up to sharing about my disorder. He slowly would make comments over time to get me to open up about things that I wasn't comfortable with... but because I thought that is what I was supposed to do I did. Then as the relationship went on I found out he lied to me.
He was engaged to me and talking to other women. I was broken, angry, hurt, sad. I forgave him and being the person I was I gave him more chance. We had good memories. We had positive times but the positive times were very tainted with the distrust.
We got married.
We made friends.
We had a life together.
We had routine.
Some of my parts felt they could be close to him, trust him, depend on him.. as they did. Some of my parts especially the younger ones which were dormant came out and they started to look at him as a Dad figure (strange but it's true) and that he was the one who was a provider, he would tuck them in, comfort them. I think even as adults we all have an inner child that wants to be nurtured, so that's what he did.
My child alters trusted him.
I tried to hide it from them that he was doing things he shouldn't I found out that he had been taking subtances that we agreed that he wouldn't take, then he became violent.
He started to hit me. He started to curse at me, spit at me, he became this man who was so aggressive one minute and horrible with me.... then he would be loving. He would be the most loving person He would sit with me and cry and hold me and tell me he's sorry, we would go back and forth like this over and over until one day one of my alters said if you don't leave him I'm going to leave and kill myself. I believe that during this time my system just exploded. I became very suicidal.
Many years of this abuse continued. He blamed it all on my 'parts' and used my disorder against me. He used it against me so much that I began to believe I was the problem. Blood soaked smashed up head. My legs almost broken. Anyway, I rang the police he got arrested and has a restraining order.
He has now been gone for 3-4 weeks.
My system is rapidly switching right now, so much so that, I don't understand how to really control it.
Some of my parts have gone into like a strange state of floating not even feeling real.
Some are out there going out into the world
Some are impulsive and just want to do anything to stop the pain
Some of my parts dont even want to know me
Some want to have a job (I'm not working right now due to the post traumatic stress) but I want to do part time because our system depended on that
My memories seem to have gone and there is a sense that my system don't know what is happening. Some are happy about the divorce... some are devastated.
I want my system to come back to when it was before we got married because I was coping,
I know it will take a lot of time, a lot of work..

If you are looking for Golden Retriever Puppies For Sale but would like something smaller that acts and looks similar? A Cavachon may be the answer.
The similarities of a Cavachon and a Golden Retriever Puppies

5 Similarities between Golden Retriever Puppies and Cavachon Puppies

While Cavachons and Golden Retrievers are different breeds with distinct characteristics, they do share many similarities besides their looks. Here are a few commonalities between the two breeds:

1. Friendly and Sociable:

Both Cavashons and Golden Retrievers are known for their friendly and sociable nature. They are typically good with people, including children, and get along well with other pets.

2. Intelligent and Trainable:

Both breeds are intelligent and trainable, making them relatively easy to house train and teach commands. They respond well to positive reinforcement training methods.

3. Affectionate:

Cavashons and Golden Retrievers are affectionate breeds that enjoy being around their human family members. They thrive on attention and love to cuddle.

4. Good with Families:

Both breeds are often recommended as good family pets due to their gentle and loving temperament. They can be great companions for families with children.

5. Energetic Lovers:

While Golden Retrievers tend to be more energetic than Cavashons, both breeds require regular exercise to stay healthy and happy. Daily walks and playtime are important for their well-being. While both dogs are big lovers, the Cavashon is the biggest human lover ever.

Final thoughts on why the Cavachon is the perfect alternative to a Golden Retriever puppy

So in terms of looks and behavior, the Cavachon is the mini version of the Golden Retriever with some “inside” advantages. The first is their grooming needs. Cavachons usually have a lower shedding coat compared to Golden Retrievers, which may be more manageable for indoor living. Their coat requires regular grooming to prevent matting and tangles, but it may be easier to maintain compared to the Golden Retriever’s double coat that sheds more.
The second will be their adaptability. Cavachons are known for their adaptability and can adjust well to indoor living as long as they receive enough mental stimulation and exercise. They are often described as good apartment dogs due to their size and temperament.
So if you’re looking for a golden retriever puppy for sale then you should consider a Cavachon which is smaller and perfect to add to your family. Give us a call today or contact us if you want to see some of our cavachons today.A Small Alternative to Golden Retriever Puppies For Sale

5:36 PM Wed 5/8/24
Mood: Terrible
Title: Alone
Details: Last year I was told that there is a whole universe out there of people to find. And that I was being endlessly supported and that people were inspired by me.
This year I learned what it's like to be hunted and chased away from goodness. It has been the worst year of my entire life and with the knowledge that there is a whole universe out there--I feel lonelier than I was before.
Not a single person wants well for me. I have to translate my thoughts, behavior, intentions, symptoms, and soul to everyone.
There hasn't been a single rest from it in over 330 days. Just endless messes and ridicule and mocking and advances and terrorism.
I'm thought I was tired of people. But I walk outside and love them so much. I learned I'm not tired of people. But I'm so so so tired of loneliness.
Being around others doesn't stop you from being lonely. Because I'm still translating. My thoughts and feelings are still not reaching and the obvious signals I send to others are being deflected and mistranslated.
I'm tired of translating for to others. On paper it's so easy to understand a person. Watching it's easy to understand and to judge. But actually reacting appropriately to context and injustice and neurodivergence even is so lost to people.
This is why I wanted to write my story. Because people don't know how to cope. They don't know how to accept bad things. They don't know the difference between bad people and good people and even today our societies are too primitive to understand it.
They're still theororizing, contemplating, changing information for their gain...never have I seen any type of science be so abstractly and subjectively defiled as I've seen happen with mental health and neurodivergence.
People cannot separate the symptom from the person and punish and subjugate and continue to dominate those less fortunate.
I'm glad I know what happens to people they don't like. I know how dangerous people can be.
I wish I had someone to protect me. So I still find myself praying and wishing for one person. Just one person I don't have to translate myself to. Just one person I don't have to have grow tired of me. Just one person I don't have to compete with.
Growing up I was used to competing. Siblings, cousins, friends. In public AND private school there's always someone or something to compete. Today I compete with my parents and yesterday I compete with women who love the one I thought I loved.
I grew accustomed to hating my own birthday because of jealousy around it because my uncle was upset he shared it with my brother and I. And because I could never have it the way I enjoyed later. Too much. I'm too much. Too far. Too long. Too attention-seeking.
I had my chance as a teen with two friends so why isn't that enough for me? My parents were happy that I finally was taking a break from illness but since I got what I asked for then I'm a spoiled ass. As if they ever treated me better even then. Golden children are still abused even when the roles swap. Because no pleasantness is atrocious.
My family told me I was fat and going to get diabetes and have a heart attack and die despite never talking to me and being in high school--where weight isn't even done being "distributed" until your mid twenties. Thanks to the prime golden child my sister.
I'm tired of fighting and competing to be heard and to have needs met and to come across as kind or kinder. It's killing me.
Why can't I ever just be me?
Why can't I ever just be my authentic self? The one I want to be as a form of worship? Me in all my phases and feelings?
Why do I have to stuff myself down or look beautiful when I'm suffering in order to be a good and kind person worth saving?
I understand Nettle so much now. I wish I never did.
If I didn't have vocal fry would I be loved? If I didn't have fat would I be loved? If I didn't have brown or blonde hair would I be loved? If I forgave my parents and suffered quietly would I be loved?
If I had sweet doe eyes or a light mousy voice would someone finally think I had autism?
The ones I see on tiktok are drop dead gorgeous women with huge colorful lives and opportunities and get to complain about "pretty privelege"
Some have a light airiness to them that make them seem like fae.
And there's me who never fits anywhere or with anyone.
I have nothing and no one and absolutely no point.
I was okay before--before I had drive and passion to find my people. Before I had dreams of finding my way and accomplishing things. Before I had just one person.
It's so cruel. The people in this world are so cruel. I just want one person.
One person from God--and loving can be worship too. I'm too tired for much else.
Just one person to save me from their damnation that seems to last forever.
I'm so exhausted all the time.
My body hurts. My head hurts. My nerves feel like nothing.
I feel hopeless. Empty. I feel like the woman from my dream.
I feel betrayed--like others saw my future and pushed me into it head first with some kind of pre-revenge. Pinched. Twisted. Groped. Lost. Forced.
Called an attention whore. Gold digger.
I feel confused. People are trying desperately to make sure no one understands me.
I'm one girl. Against a whole universe and groups of people.
The emotional, psychological, and societal manipulation is obscure.
I keep reading revelations 2:24 to feel better.
It feels like Thyatira. I'm trying to hold fast to the idea that God may rescue me from whatever this is. A trial--make believe--experimentation--prisonment for knowing too much.
He asks we wait patiently for him to come and rescue us.
And many biblical figures had to wait for years and years. Upwards to like 100 if you were Abraham.
So while every day things feel like battle now, I am still trying.
I want to give myself OT and PT...I've done it for others so it can't be hard.
And with the flashbacks and emotional flashbacks and meltdowns and outbursts...I'm going to try treating myself for PTSD too.
Until I get the help I need somehow--I don't know what else to do.
I know others are tired of helping me. When you don't seem to receive pleasantness it's par for the course.
But I'm tired of competing for needs to be met. Can't everyone just work harder to understand bodies and minds and signals--then people would have their needs met and there'd be no need to compete.
I'm tired of fighting for myself. I'm tired of doing it alone.
I'm tired of being with others and doing it lonely.
The world isn't just crumbling due to climate change. Our minds are shifting and crumbling with it.
It makes sense. The weather affects people. Everyone I know is so tired. There's no way we are evolved enough to know God and be in his presence. There's no way we are advanced. Even this phone feels archaic to me--the programs we use feel archaic.
I understand now why capitalism is seen as demonic and evil. The control of drip marketing contents and technology is so slow and pointless.
Our resources are depleting. War is happening still. Communism wouldn't help either. It's the same song with a different tune.
I'll keep living because that's what he wants from people. I want to make God proud. I want people's lives to be easier.
I want people to stop competing and performing and wanting to die drenched in lies.
Maybe that's why it's a sin to lie. It halts evolution not just on others but yourself too. Living a lie halts growth.
It's difficult but Faith seems to be the part that is supposed to ground you in it. Like--I don't know WHY I can't lie in this situation but I have to be honest.
Anyways in these moments I wonder if philosophy and religion is a coping skill or a turning something bad into something good.
I guess I should just keep doing what I need to do and not what others want me to do.
It seems whenever I do what others want I suffer more than before.
I usually value collaboration. But when others Stop valuing it--then it's time for something to be done.
These people are messed up. They have no emotional retention. They have no ability to remember the things they do--Like it doesn't exist to them.
The heat, my hormones shifting, the trauma of seeing her again, and other things seemed to trigger a huge meltdown? Fight or flight? PTSD attack?
No wonder the woman from my dream was so empty--her body and mind have been through war and emotional, psychological, and spiritual survival.
I can only pray that I'm not chemically like a porn addicted person--I don't want to lose the idea that sex to me is love. After everything I mean.
I don't have the time in life to heal. There's so much I have to do and everyone still sees me as a wallet drainer and leech.
I don't trust anyone to help me. I don't trust anyone to love me. I don't trust love because it's not enough to make these other things go away.
I understand why people are calling for a civil war on the rich. And their help? To not be seen as bad people? Their help is "we will make others more like us!"
Natural selection affects them too.
Which is funny. They think they've escaped it ofc. I do think that people are right. Celebrities and other rich people aren't useful anymore.
They don't have much use anymore.
Anyways.
I feel lonely. I feel trauma everywhere. Like I've always been hit by a bus.
It's ironic I think--the "I wouldn't do it without a trained professional" people are so dangerous.
I did better without them...always.
It's hard not to hate life.
I always have to compete for needs and wants and sacrafice them.
For siblings, friends, lovers, parents, students, strangers, buyers, consumers, voices...
I sacrafice for these people to have better all the time. I don't have the energy to do anything else. I don't have anything else to provide but what I can scrounge up and then hand off or step aside.
I just want someone.
Someone who knows and loves me and understands me in full.
I can't let these people take away my voice or my story or my dreams for myself when they're already so blessed.
Only those well off say "you should be grateful"
What you did to survive and achieve versus what I did will never be the same.
So I'll hopefully find a way. To let my future husband be able to comfort me and know me in full after this whole experience. I'll find a way for him to know every page in my story and leaf through and bookmark his favorites.
Who in the universe would take away that from their victims so easily? That they could just have one?
These people can be vampires.
I get tired--I fall asleep--they suck the energy out of me.
They leave all their bad thoughts behind.
The world needs a miracle.
Activities: Food Sleep Screens
Emotions: Hurt Overwhelmed Confused Lonely Stressed Empty Hopeless
Unhelpful Thought: I'll never be well. No one will ever understand me. No one does. I'm alone. I'm always alone and I'll always be alone. People will only ever take from me or use me. People want me to die. My parents want me to die. I end up believing them and wanting it too.
I'll never have a life. I'll never have my own life. I'll never be me. I'll never be free.
Cognitive Distortions: Fortune-telling Self-blaming
Challenge: I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry that you've been through so much trauma in such little time. I'm so sorry you have to fight to comfort yourself and your fight response has increased so astronomically.
It must be scary to have to use it. It must be scary to never know when the pain will stop or when they will cause your attacks to start.
I don't know much about PTSD but considering the flashbacks and how even in moments for you they violate every piece of you--it only makes sense that you have resorted to fighting. I'm sorry you're body has to respond so uncomfortably and abnormally.
But try to remember that these are all normal responses to the abnormal. Your body is scared and terrified and it's been 330 days of exhaustion. The fatigue makes sense. The survival instincts makes sense. Your body and brain are working so hard for you so you can keep loving one day when the trauma responses ebb away.
There's no cure that I know of for these ailments. PTSD, depression, SAD, anxieties, potential autism. All these comorbidities must be eating away at you. The fact that they keep triggering you doesn't help either.
I'm sorry they push you. I'm sorry you've been through rape. I'm sorry you can barely pick up the pieces before they hurt you again.
I'm sorry I have to be the one to apologize to you for everything that's happened and still happens. I'm sorry they abuse you as you try to write and don't listen to no or clear boundaries.
The only advice I can think to give so you may have peace in these moments is to stop saving them. Let the bad continue to do bad. Let the Rapists continue to be Rapists. Do not work to absolve them of anything or bring good from their lives.
They're learning how to hurt you in different ways instead. They're recruiting new people late to everything instead.
Teeny tiny Tina, I'm still working so hard for you to be loved. I'm working so hard for you to stay safe. For you and I to stop fighting.
For you and I to stop freezing and being abused and for them to push you your fight responses and fear of your own body.
I'm sorry they tell you it's demons. When it's her. I'm sorry she won't leave you alone. I'm sorry she and others won't have boundaries with you.
I'm sorry they use you to teach her what her Delusions look like in another person because she forgets to be a human in others bodies and can't let her ego go.
I'm sorry they drug you so she can be comforted.
I'm sorry they don't know what you are going through. When I write as if I'm not you I can't imagine this pain.
I hope one day you are safe and rescued. I hope one day you find someone who will save you from her and them and the ones who abuse you.
I know my hopes are meaningless and that under normal circumstances when you are only you--I can always write meaningful advice without resorting to vapid generics.
I hope that one day you can be enough for yourself again.
I hope they don't bleed you dry. Don't kill yourself no matter what they say and do and feed on altruistic notions.
It's a complete mind fuck. The support needs to come from you. When they do it--don't believe them.
May you find peace Tina.
Alternative Thought: You will be saved. You will find help. Normal people know that it's wrong. These stars are illusions.
Normal people can help better. Find a community that can give you a break and accept you. That won't let your mind fall apart.
Don't let their ironic wishes for you give you peace. Don't let it give THEM peace. They don't mean it they just want it to be them.
Do not be like them. Do not live a lie. Address your hatred front on. Address why you hate front on so you may be free from it.
Do not be like them. Keep the bible in mind but please be who you want to be--which is exactly how God created and therefore called you to be.
Your calling is to heal and fight hatred for now.
Your calling is to find safety. May the lord bear you on eagles wings.
You do not have religious psychosis. You need to keep remembering who the fuck you are.
You are too smart for your own good. You are too self sacrificing for your own good. You see the bad in the good for people to address and attack and heal. You are kind when not under duress. You have illness. You need diagnosis. You have had terrible things happen. Surreal and awful. You always find a way to make things right. You always grow and evolve and change. You are you and others will not visibly see it.
Keep your self grounding mindfulness. Mindfulness is not oppression. It's a tool for a single person. Yourself. Not others.
Keep steady. Take a walk. Do something new. Discover something. Don't just stay in your mind doing it all there.
You need stimulation. You may be close to the end of figuring what you need to figure out out.
Then look at these thoughts and see how little and small they are in comparison to who you are and how you faced them. You are always seeking to heal and retain your values. That dualism and unobstructed steadfastness is your namesake.
It's in your birthday, your name, your experiences, your ring, your prayers, your loves, your hates, your stories, and every part of you.
You can never not be you. Except when your free will is in the hands of another.
Keep fighting for peace. Write and draw and explore within your means. Your life may seem so small but the meaning you have, the blessings God gave you to remember, the irreplaceable meaning everywhere is a gift from him.
And with this you never stop creating. Up and down. Up and down. If David in all his emotional complexities is a "man after God's own heart" then allow yourself to fall and thank God for his discipline.
He corrects those he accepts. He shows the wisdom of it to those he loves.
Keep his ever present and obvious love for you in your heart.
And even though you think Jonah is so funny, please allow yourself to give "testimony" one day and ask people to repent and show them God's love. Be unashamed. Be devoted. Be passionate. Don't let others kill your fire.
You know what it's like. You know what thoughts come from these terrible scenarios. You know how badly you want saving.
Others do too.
Show people that God's love IS unconditional. And learn and translate and write.
Translate God's Holy Spirit and intentions and goals to others.
He will bless you. He is pursuing your heart.
Remember how small the flaws are in others in comparison to them. How little it means for them to dislike what you do or help the opposing neighbor.
You are admired. And sometimes admiration turns bad and becomes jealousy.
You are very lonely. And you have learned ways to find yourself in all the versions of loneliness there are.
You are used. You are abused.
And that story lives and cannot be erased no matter how hard they try. Eternity is the sock that fell from their push. It feels so inescapable.
Your healing and self growth is awkward.
But you can still live. And you love others enough to be awkward with them.
Let yourself remember that this means that you love yourself to be awkward with yourself and allow it.
In that way you have already broken one cycle. That people need to see you in good perfect ways in order to have even self love.
You are strong. You are so passionate. And still while moored and mired in guck and hatred you still do everything out of love.
For yourself and others.
Your own body even is reflecting that incredibly. Your brain doesn't WANT to give up. It wants to fight, to survive, to fawn, to freeze.
Your brain and body is fighting for your love. Your self love and your future love and your love for others.
It's natural to feel this exhaustion after it all.
Tell yourself a new fortune too. A new self attribution. Balance it out.
You're going to always have love. It's in all your cells and the things you touch.
When you drop what you like and feel pain--however small--that tiny regret is love.
Your love is worth it. Your drive to be well is always worth it.
We are adapting. Love yourself enough to be awkward with it. It will feel really big and like the world is ending because it's the first time you've felt these ways.
God bless you.

Normally you'd never catch me on here. This being my very first post after using Reddit for many years. So here goes nothing and I'll keep it short.
Hi, I'm a 26 year old from Florida who is your A-Typical mans man. I've always been called older than I am and constantly try to understand the world and the people around me better and improve myself.
I work in an armed capacity and see the highs and lows of society most every day. I am 6'5 and weigh 285lbs but I'm trying to cut to around 275, my ideal weight. I used to do powerlifting and I love heavy weights, it's a weird obsession for me. Man things, pick things up, put things down lol.
I considered myself open minded and patient with people. I'm a good public speaker and I stand my ground on things I feel I must protect. My job requires it, but I've always been that way.
What Im looking for, I likely won't find, but I'm very willing to give it a shot. I want a girl who's 19-27, preferably white but I'm open to anything, petite in size, kind, considerate and wants to really work towards a future for herself. I'm a big dude and I like smaller girls, fun to lift you up and all that. If you think you're cute, I'll likely find you adorable. You don't have to be anything but you.
I enjoy video games when I'm not working and if you do too, that's a huge bonus. I'm the romantic guy who will surprise you with random trips to get ice cream or take you shopping on a whim. My version of adventure is hopping in my car, picking a direction and just driving for fun. Life is too short to waste happiness or time and that's exactly why I'm here.
If you give me you, I'll give you the world.
I'm willing to make accomodations and work things out for my relationship so it results in the best it can be. I give my all, and tend to protect and fight for things I love and believe in.
Honesty, loyalty, strength and in all, honor. Those are my most sacred values.
This is Reddit after all, and this is just a wall of text, so if any of this resonates with you and you think there might be something to let flourish between us, message me on here and we'll talk and hopefully move off the platform to understand each other better. I am an open book, with nothing to hide.
Everything should happen naturally, be it fast or slow, whatever is right, is right. I hope you're out there and I hope I can make you the happiest girl in the world.

• L

I knew I was getting more mature when mailings from AARP started asking if I still feel okay
I kid, but my life insurance company has stopped sending Christmas cards.
I don't feel old, but I keep hearing my favorite songs playing in elevators.
Oh, you didn't come here for the monologue?
I'm 63, permanently separated, and operate my business from Las Vegas. I am relaxed, friendly, and occasionally entertaining. I am ambitious and hard working. I have a highly questionable sense of humor. I know this, because whether it is actually humor is frequently questioned.
I am looking for a mutually beneficial friendship that is authentic and enjoyable for both of us. I am seeking a smart, organized and ambitious woman for an arrangement grounded in affection. In case it isn't obvious, what I seek is something with a bit more gravitas than an occasional "let's get together and party." My idea of an ideal arrangement is one that looks a lot like a caring relationship, with communication, dates, and a lot of laughs, if you can tolerate my sense of humor.
I will take you seriously as a woman, and I will ask you do the same for me, hopefully as a man. Goals.
I am in Las Vegas, and it would be helpful to this endeavor if you are too, or travel here regularly. I heard they have gambling and sports activities here, so it is not a terrible place to visit.
If you're wondering what I like to do, I made this handy list: cook together, go to Red Rock Canyon for a drive and hike, watch a movie, hit up a casino, go shooting, go to a Raiders game, listen to some music, look at some art, or go on a photo shoot out and about somewhere.
Am I handsome? Well, when I was born, the doctor held me up by my feet and slapped my parents.
I went to a shrink once, I said, "Doc, I feel like I'm ugly. What should I do?" He made me lie on the couch face down.
But I clean up well.
And let me leave you with this quote: "The main problem with the Internet is that things are not always exactly as they appear." -Abraham Lincoln

Seba CJ2 + Intuition liners sizing question:
NOTE: I made a video explaining this and showing it visually, so please feel free to watch instead of reading for more clarity: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jMLRyhfMW9w&ab_channel=PoznicTraining
I'm new to wizard skating and just got my first used setup, and need some help with sizing issues I'm having. Here goes:

• My feet are 26.5cm long, and super wide.
  
• Bought a used pair of plastic CJ2's in size 9 with the stock liners, but am about to order Intuition Premium liners. When I use them with the stock liner, the length is great, but my toes are just a tiny bit cramped, and, more importantly, they squeeze the middle of foot really badly. Even if I barely lace them at all and barely pull on the strap, it still hurts a bit, and if I lace them and pull the strap enough to feel any real support, it's very painful, to the point where my foot cramps and I have to take them off after just a bit of skating.
  
• So my options are:
  

1. Gut the CJ2's and try them with the Intuition Premium liner. My fear is that while I've heard they're thinner and therefore have more space, when I put my hand into the boot, there's already almost no padding on the part that's around the part of my foot that hurts, so I doubt I could gain much at all in terms of that width. I have heard, though, that the Intuition is also thinner in the back, so my foot might slide back a bit and therefore have more width in the front?
   
2. Resell the CJ2's used and buy a new pair of CJ2's or CJ2 Primes without liner to use with the Intuition liners and hope the size up increases enough width to make them comfortable, without being so long that I'm swimming in them.
   

A part of me would like to gut the CJ2's I own and try them with the Intuition liner, but am nervous that if I do that and it's still too tight, I'll be reselling a pair of gutted CJ2's with no liner at all, and surely losing some money compared to reselling them with the stock liner in there in great condition. On the other hand, if I but new CJ2's in a size bigger and they end up being too big, I'll have lost even more money.
Ok, if you've read this far, THANK YOU! My questions are:

1. If you've gutted CJS'2 for Intuition Premium liners, did you experience a noticeable increase in WIDTH through the middle of your foot?
   
2. With my feet measuring 26.5cm, I was going to order the liners in the 26-26.5 size, but read a few people saying they went one size up and were more comfortable. Thoughts?
   

Thanks so much in advance, super grateful for any suggestions anyone has!

So it's popular to doubt Game Pass due to a lack of understanding of the model. Xbox/Microsoft wants Game Pass to be the Netflix of gaming. We know that, but no one questions Netflix. Netflix initially had old movies and TV shows on DVD. So let's talk Netflix and their competitors.
They later did streaming. What was happening around then? Streaming wars were incomming due to Netflix becoming popular. Studios wanted more money and then thought, wait why don't we do our own at some point. Netflix started spinning up their own content in landmark deals, House of Cards whole first season was green lit. Netflix began blowing money to draw eyesballs at this point. They needed continued subscriptions growth to help mitigate the blowing of cash but they new they would only survive with engaging new titles since they were losing the back catalog that most people were watching. Yes, Bright got headlines, but losing Friends and the Office hurt Netflix.
Netflix doesn't get the ability to make a big theatrical run pop that makes 500million dollars and then the 2nd run with it being on TV. So what do they do? They end series after a couple seasons. They do things to gain acclaim or get everyone talking. 2020 came along and what were we talking about in March/April? Tiger King. It's a far cry from Bright but it took over the globe.
What did Netflix's competitors do? They launched services and made original content. A lot are flopping. I won't mention Quibbi, Vudu, Crackle or all the other low tier streaming services. HBOMax was in it's best in 2020. They got my money. They about faced on that their features releasing day and date, started cancelling shows, merged and changed their name and cancelled/scrapped completed projects. I cancelled my service and only came back when they offered it for 99¢ a month for the ad version for a year. Guess what, I'll be cancelling it when the price changes.
Disney locked in a lot of subscribers for 2-5 years pre-launch. They released a lot of new content to mixed to meh results. They made a Willion series and cancelled it after season 1. X-Men 97 got me to log into a family account to watch it starting 3 weeks ago.
CBS All Access became Paramount Plus. They went in on Star Trek and now Paramount is looking to get sold in a weird way where the IP would stay with Sony but paramount plus would get sold off?
Peacock made headlines for their Bel Air series but I've heard more people talk positive about Crackle than ever mention Peacock.
**** Back to Game Pass****
If Microsoft stick's to their plan, they will be Netflix. They need to work on getting subscriptions. I'm sure a lower tier Game Pass, that's just their phone games will get a lot of new subscribers. They won't take as many big swings like Netflix did for Bright. They will take moderate swings like Netflix did for Adam Sandler movies and stand up. They will hopefully work with TV partners to make sure new TVs can play Game Pass. They don't need a handheld if all the new Samsungs and LG TVs have a built in 100 dollar piece of equipment. They will make more TV shows and movies. They might not of made a new Fallout game, but the series made the old games spike in sales and plays.
Microsoft made a service that influenced a service that made PlayStation and Nintendo copy parts of it. Some of the same Games Journos who bemoan Game Pass as unsustainable also really want Nintendo to copy them more, usually justifying emulation/piracy.
You won't like what Xbox/Microsoft does all the time. If we lose Phil Spencer, you'll get someone way more keen to be a Bobby Kotick and keep his job then someone who loves videos as a medium. You don't have to agree or support them. Vote with your wallets. I'm just a Nintendo Day 1 fan, who owns all the systems and likes what Microsoft is building to.
P.S. a cancelled TV series doesn't get the same press as a closed game studio but the loss of jobs and impact is the same. You look at all the crew and then people hired to do related jobs... Like the craft services, security and post production services. It hurts.

When I was preparing to take this course I wish I had a detailed review like this, so hope this helps...
General thoughts: I would be lying if I said this class is "easy." It's definitely not a class you can not study for at all and get perfect scores in. You need to put in the work. But it's not impossible, and definitely not as horrible as some people make it out to be.
Part 1 (Professor Ahmet Yildiz):
I went into the first section of the course thinking I'd need to memorize a bunch of amino acids, pKa's, etc.. There was not a lot of that. Yildiz is a professor who prefers application/conceptual understanding over brute force memorization. Take this with a grain of salt because the fall/other professors may have a different approach to the first section of 102. There is still quite a bit of info you need to memorize, but not to the extent people make it out to be.
His lectures are fairly dry. He did not know how to keep track of time/pace himself very well so he would often go thru only half a slide deck and need to pick back up during the next lecture. Thankfully he stuck to his word and did not expect us to learn info he didn't get to. Important to note that he has a fairly thick accent and talks quite fast so it can be difficult to catch every word he is saying at times. Nonetheless, his slides were pretty clear.
Exam was difficult but honestly not as bad as Ochem exams were for me. There's a mix of mcq, true/false, short answer, calculations, etc... The calculation questions were the hardest imo. Keep in mind he's a biophysicist so you'll see some of his physics background show up in the lectures & the way he frames his calculation-based questions. Regardless, the practice exam he gave from last year was definitely reflective of his exam.
He was the only professor to hold in-person office hours (helpful) and did stop for questions during lecture. Unfortunate part was that very little practice questions written by him were provided besides the practice exam.
Part 2 (Professor Evan Miller):
This section was quite content heavy, but was honestly my favorite section of the course. I attribute that to Miller's teaching. Miller is just amazing at what he does. He's super clear, succinct, articulate, knowledgable, and easy to follow along. His lectures pack in quite a lot of info but it never felt like that because he would annotate on his iPad alongside us as he taught. He always finished his lectures on time and was never in a rush. It's pretty obvious he has been doing this for a long time. He incorporated a lot of learning strategies in his section (active discussion/share-outs during lecture, pre/post surveys to assess student understanding, activities during discussion section, etc...).
Miller provided plenty of practice questions that were reflective/helpful for the exam. We received numerous problem sets, 2 practice exams, and practice questions built into the lecture. His exam was really long but because there was so many potential points - each question was not worth a whole lot (more room for mistakes). He was very upfront with his expectations and very helpful in office hours (held via Zoom).
Miller's section did incorporate some Ochem mechanisms but there were only 2-3 mechanisms on the exam. His section requires a combination of pattern recognition, memorization, and application. Very little to no math. After doing a bunch of practice questions you really get a feel for the type of questions he likes to ask.
Part 3 (Professor Ross Wilson):
People told me this section would be the easiest of the course. Not necessarily the case.
Professor Wilson is an extremely kind and easy-to-talk to/down-to-earth guy. He was always smiling, laughing, and making it easy to approach him. Nonetheless, his section's structure was not very helpful. Lectures were pre-recorded videos from 2020 that we were expected to watch on our own time. During the scheduled lecture time, Wilson would occasionally (on select days) show up to the lecture hall and do a Q&A / mini-review of the most recent lecture videos. Keep in mind these pre-recorded lectures were often an hour or longer. Wilson also stuttered/mumbled a lot. He would say something and then start questioning what he himself said or take something back. Or he would post a "correction" to something he said in the lecture videos. When people would ask questions during his in-person sessions, he would often get thrown off or not have a clear answer. I'm sure he's a smart guy but not necessarily the best teacher.
Wilson would provide really short assignments to complete (1-2 questions) but would then tell us that these questions were very hypothetical, not the best questions, too challenging, etc... Wilson constantly said he would not write such tricky questions on exams, but this wasn't necessarily the case. He was also constantly making comments about how he could have worded certain things better.
He was nice enough to provide ALL exams he's given while he's taught this course. He told us the most recent practice exam (2023) was going to be the most reflective, which was not 100% true because that exam was much much easier than ours and had questions straight up copy/pasted from previous years. Our exam was much harder than I expected it to be because the fill in the blank questions/MCQ's were each worth a lot of points. Getting one word or question wrong was quite costly. It was sometimes unclear what Wilson was asking for, or two answer choices seemed correct for the MCQ. It was kinda shocking because Wilson made it seem like his exam was going to be the easiest/ most straightforward when in reality it was quite challenging.
Content-wise, Wilson packed a LOT into his lectures. It was hard to sense what was essential info and what was more supplemental/examples. The way he structured his lectures often felt out of order. The man did provide an "elements to know" list with essential terms/concepts however, which did help.
I would argue part 3 was the hardest section of the course because of the structure/teaching style though Wilson is a hella chill guy.
Overall thoughts:
This course definitely takes foundational concepts from Bio 1A and builds on it (with some added Ochem ideas/principles and a bit of math).If you liked Bio 1A you will probably enjoy the course content. The professors were pretty decent but had 3 different teaching styles/course formats so I could see people getting lost with expectations/deadlines/assignments if they didn't attend class in-person. It would have been nice if things were consistent across the three sections.
One issue I had with the course was the lack of transparency regarding course grading. It took many weeks for the first exam to be graded and then the regrade process was a little chaotic. The professors never brought up grade bins during class nor was there anything about grades in the syllabus. I never knew how I was doing or what grade I might get in the class. People kept telling me that to get an A you had to do approx 1.5 stdv above average, which definitely caused some anxiety.
If you have to take this class I'd recommend it in the spring. For the spring semester, you get a 4x6 cheatsheet notecard for every exam (not always useful but still better than nothing). Lecture recordings are always provided (which I heard isn't the case for all 3 sections in the fall). The professors ended up being very generous with the final grade bins for the course. We weren't provided with final cutoffs, but the head GSI suggested that approx 60 percent of the class got some form of A's or B's.
I was fortunate enough to do well in the course, so here is my advice for future students... 1) Don't skip lecture/ always attend in-person! I never missed a single one so keeping up with the material was not an issue. It's super easy to get behind in this class yet significantly difficult to get back on track once you slip up 2) Attend professor OH: I did this off and on but when I did go they were helpful. 3) Go to all review sessions - I attended GSI review sessions, professor review sessions, and the SLC ones - you have nothing to lose by going (more exposure to material the better). 4) Grind out ALL the practice exams/problems provided. They are 100% the best way to prepare for exams. 5) Take good notes and actually review them frequently. 6) Make Quizlet or Anki your best friend: I used flashcards to prep for every section and studied them on the daily. 7) Ask questions on ED or during discussion section: GSI's are very kind & willing to help.
I used the textbook a little bit for part 1 (was somewhat helpful) and did not for parts 2 & 3. You don't need it, nor would I recommend going searching for Youtube videos. Lecture has everything you need. Oh, and there's no cumulative final! Midterm 3 (section 3 exam) happens during the allotted final exam time. Workload for the class is on the lighter side - just some problem sets that are graded on completion.
All in all, I actually enjoyed the course to some extent. It was definitely a rollercoaster of emotions / a challenging journey, but I think if you put in a lot of work/effort and remain positive - an A is not out of reach. This is not a Bio 1A/1B or Chem 1A where you can simply study the night before and still do amazing (all 3 exams had averages between 55 and 60 percent btw). But it's not at all the horrible class people scare you into thinking - it's likely easier than the physics series here and some upper div MCB courses. I wish people didn't make this class seem like it's straight out of a horror movie, but at the same time hearing people's experiences definitely pushed me to work harder.

I been seeing a lot of situationships that don't turn into relationships. People have sex but not just sex, they sleepover, hang out, talk have fun, watch movies together, have meals lunch or dinner, take shower on each other place, for months, but them one of the persons says that don't have feelings from the other. Them I see relationships where they don't have sex for months, live together but they get along well and like each others, but there's always one person that miss sex.
It's so bad to have someone you like to have sex and company that you don't want to commit, because something is missing or having a relationship without sex?
Or these situationships that is just like a relationship but without the commitment but you have all perks you have in a relationships, is this fair?Why people are complicated so much things theses days?

I feel lost and frustrated because I believe I can do much better in life! I’m 39, more of an introvert but I socialize well with people. I’m open-minded, humble, well-educated and I’ve been always told that I’m very smart with a dark sense of humor.. A family man, dedicating all of my time and efforts to my family; wife and son and my stay-home mother (lost my father 8 years ago). I’ve been through a lot in my life, but I stand strong and become stronger with time to the point where I don’t give a damn about many things in life.. I have a secure job with good income I always appreciate what I have and I truly feel gratitude towards everything that I have especially when you see how miserable life can get for others! I’m nearing my 40’s and I’ve become aware that time flies swiftly! I’ve started to take care of myself like I used to be; dressing well, listening to music, reading, taking care of my skin, stretching, and trying to live the moment.. I want to change myself and how I perceive myself to be more confident and to set up clear goals in my life.. I used to be judgmental and negative in some way.. I’m looking at the bright side of life now.. yet, I feel that I don’t have time for myself to make a life changing decision that can truly transform my life.. and when I double check and look for the main source of this feeling I find that it’s because I want my son and future kids to live a better life.. I get really scared when I think that they would go through things that are somewhat similar to what I have been through.. I feel that I have a lot of potential and many ideas that can really be turned into business, but I’m scared cause I’m never ready for a change, I’m bound to too many financial and family obligations.. I want to invest in something that can really help me secure some cash to feel safe whenever I take a decision to make a new business or create an app, launch a YouTube channel or blog Reading my post is much appreciated, thanks for your time and advice