My husband (27M) and I (38M) are doing a trip across Europe at the moment. He’s American and I’m British and we reside mostly in the UK. We’ve had experiences with boomers (too many experiences) but our travels across Europe have been something else.
95% of these boomers were, it seemed, American.
Ok some examples. Brace yourself. Here we go:

1. Venice. A city of tiny islets connected by bridges and where water taxis, gondolas and walking over bridges is commonplace. On approaching a very narrow bridge, I noticed a clump of people. As we got closer I saw a woman shouting, and then I heard her. She’s American, standing with her arms outstretched as to block access and she was SCREAMING: “Don’t walk on this bridge!! WE ARE TAKING PHOTOS ON OUR CELLPHONES!” Behind her, her friends were all posing while simultaneously struggling to operate their phones. Obviously people were just ignoring her, so she’s becoming irate. By the time we got to her I can’t help myself (I never have been able to) so I said: “Get fucked lady.” I think my backpack might have hit her as I pushed past her. Ooops.
2. At a water taxi station, a group of 8 or so boomers didn’t have the correct tickets to scan to get on the taxi taxi so they just PUSHED the ticket barriers until they gave way so they could board. This was noticed by the taxi boat staff, however, and they the departure of the boat was delayed while they had to phone the police.
3. On a taxi gondola (one that goes directly across a canal, not one that takes you on a romantic tour) a boomer boarded after us. The ‘driver’ tells him in clear English to sit down. He doesn’t comply, instead choosing to parade up and down causing the gondola to destabilise and even for water to come aboard, even before we’ve left the port. He has the absolute temerity to tell the driver to “KEEP THIS THING STEADY! I'M TRYING TO TAKE PHOTOS YOU IDIOT!” The driver tells him to either sit down or leave. He reluctantly obeys but as he sits down mutters something like “… won the second world war!”
4. We went to an ultra high end restaurant on our final night in Venice and at the table next to us are a couple of American boomers. The man had a very unusual complexion, looking like he’s spent far too long in the sun. When their bill came, he threw a FIT because they won’t accept AmEx. “This is FUCKING OUTRAGEOUS!” He screams at the waiter who is about 18 and doesn’t really understand what is being said to him. “WE USE THIS CARD ALLL THE TIME AT HOME!” I leaned over and said: “Errrrrr, so in Europe AmEx isn’t often accepted because of the very high transaction fees. Perhaps you could-“ to which he snapped at me: “Mind your own fucking business! Nobody asked you or your boyfriend.”
5. In Zürich, we had to contend with a boomer who kept getting in the way of us taking photos. It was like he was deliberately standing in our way. At one point he seemed to almost accidentally touch my husband. Eventually I said: “hey bro, we’re trying to take a picture of us together. Can you give us some room?” To which he snapped: “You don’t own this hill you know!!”
6. We had a 7 hour train journey from one country to another. We had a first class reservation. Once we boarded, we found two boomer couples sitting around a table, which our two seats were part of. I explained we had a reservation. One of them said: “Well you can’t have, we have this table.” I produced the reservation and said: “You can clearly see it says we are in this coach, in first class, in these seats. Can I see YOUR reservation?” They refused, with the man from the other couple saying: “You don’t even look like you can afford first class tickets, son. Why don’t you run along before I get security?” I turned to my husband and said: “Go and get someone.” He did so, and they spend the next 15 minutes berating me, saying I’d be “very embarrassed” when I am told to leave the train. One of them even said: “Yeah they’ll show you up like the poor you are.” Husband returned with ticket inspector who looked at our tickets and then asks them to produce theirs. They argue briefly, and upon being threatened with removal from the train, produce tickets for second class with no reservations. The inspector tells them to leave the first class section “immediately or this will be a matter for the police” (which she said in French so I had the great pleasure of translating). They reluctantly got up to go and made a HUGE huff and puff about it. One of them pulled his bag off a luggage rack and managed to hit a child sitting near the rack with it, and then verbally abused the child’s parents when they dared to complain. At the next stop the train stopped for about 30 minutes and announcements were made that there was an “unexpected delay”. The ticket lady from before came to tell us that the four of them had been asked to leave because of their behaviour in second class, refused to do so, and therefore the police were brought in.
7. In Prague, went to a very old family owned restaurant. One of the family is a university student who happened to get talking to a boomer couple. He’s studying computing science and artificial intelligence. They tell him he is “contributing to the end of humanity”. The male boomer adds: “I was teaching people how to use Microsoft 20 years ago, I know what computers can do! And this is very dangerous….!” Needless to say, this 19 year old who understands only basic English is very confused.
8. In Milan, a boomer couple walked past me in a shop and I heard the woman say: “Fucking useless, this Italy. Everyone here speaks in foreign.”
9. In an airport to travel from Germany to Zürich, a boomer couple decided to start regulating the line to board the jet. They stood in the way of the gate desk, letting only older people past and holding younger people back. I snapped at once: “What are you doing? Get out of the way, man” and as I walked past him I heard “… elders first! Elders first!” When I was on the jet and seated, the wife came up to me ONCE WE WERE IN THE AIR and said I had been “very disrespectful” to her husband and “you are now required to apologise.” My husband, seeing I was on the verge of committing a murder, said: “Look, you got your moment of glory earlier in controlling the queue. Take your pound of flesh and fuck off.” She then snaps: “OR WHAT?” to which my husband calmly replies: “Or we make a complaint right now about your disruptive behaviour onboard an aircraft. Don’t tend to like that, the Swiss.” And then he sits down and instantly puts his AirPods in and turning away from her. I had to look out of the window so she didn’t see me smiling.
10. In Milan we visited a museum showcasing technologies through the ages. It was enormous, and very comprehensive. In one display case they have an original Macintosh from 1984. As I stand looking at it, I became aware of some raised - distinctly American - voices. “What the hell!! Are they saying they MADE the computer?!!? WE MADE THE COMPUTER.” I can’t resist (again) and turn to him and say to this group of 6 boomers: “Actually, ladies and gents, the modern inventor of the computer is Alan Turing, an English guy who broke the German’s Enigma code during World War 2. This Macintosh is here just because of its historical significance-“ I didn’t get any further cos he cut me off with “UGH. So it’s the ENGLISH stealing our tech now!”

I am writing this because we were both have been genuinely taken aback by what we have experienced. I have travelled extensively in Europe and never quite come up against this before, so I don’t know if it means that the Boomer problem is getting worse or what.

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And by “everything” I mean “not literally, but I need another guitar like I need another hole in the head”.
Consideration: budget of around $150 (Musician’s Friend in-store credits, so limitations apply on used/sale/special deals)
I’ve looked at a few things so far, but also thought I could double it out of pocket and get something basically half price, so around $250-$300 range.
What I already have so far: A shit ton of guitars and basses (20 guitars, 8 basses, including doubleneck 6/12 and 2 bass/guitar doublenecks, one a Frankenstein), tuners, cases for all, a keyboard, a set of drums (2 Alesis kits merged into a 16-piece), sticks, throne, Katana Artist MKII (with both GAFC and EX and Expression pedal and an EVM12L Black Label speaker), enough strings (though, really…), straps, picks, cables for nearly everything, a p.a. system (2 15” subs, 15” mains, 12” mains/monitors) with mixeinterface (PreSonus 24R), pedals (volume, wah, multifx, Synth9, String9, expression), mics (SM57 and 58), mic stands, windsocks, pop filter, tabletop mic stands, speaker stands for the p.a., OneSpots, power strips, snakes (XLR and 1/4”, TS and TRS), keyboard amp, extra amp (200w Quilter and a 1x12 with EVM12L), DAW, GK3s and synth module, Virtual Jeff Pro (Whammy pedal with a wiggly stick), GoPros/camcorders, tripods, iPad, stand for iPad/laptop, laptop, small (22”) monitor for laptop, music stand, mic stand shelf thingy, cable and other accessories bag, spare rack cases, and probably more stuff I’m forgetting.
What I’ve looked at/considered so far: Another bass, another guitar so I can make another Frankenstein bass/guitar doubleneck, another EVM12L (could basically get it half price), replacement pickups (guitar or bass), more of what I already have (cables and strings I can get any time and prefer Sweetwater for most things anyway, and ebay for used pickups cheap), upping the limit to $1000 and getting something for $150 off (Ludwig Element kit) but that would probably just cover the sales tax and faster shipping, get started on an actual bass amp (head, cabinet, or speaker and source a cabinet elsewhere, but keyboard amp and/or direct to the p.a. works just fine), another EHX 9-series pedal (I did like the C9 when I had one, but the B9 and Mel9 were awesome, and all 3 sound amazing together), a Sansamp bass pedal (just because Sansamp), another expression pedal for the Katana, or get something for half price and sell it as new for just under new price on ebay and have spendable cash I can put towards anything anywhere.
“Depends on your current/future needs”; YouTube is free enough for any kind of lessons/learning resources, so instructional material is mostly obsolete. Software I have is good enough. Not really a VST user. I do need/want more wall mounting stuff but prefer String Swing, and MF don’t carry it (specifically I need the long-armed one with the rail).
I could use the 3rd EVM12L, so I can put the Waza back in the Katana and two of the EVs in my old 2x12 cabinet, but it’s not a priority.

Hi! I'm heading to Paris soon, and wanted to get some last-minute thoughts on my itinerary and anything I'm missing!
Our top things we love when traveling:

• Food / Food Markets
• Shopping (Stores & Markets)
• Culture

We are also 100% fine with being very on-the-go and fitting in as much as possible, while still taking it all in.
Thursday

• Arrive in CDG, get into Paris around 1:00?
  • Drop bags at hotel
• Lunch
  • Huîtrerie Régis
    • Sit there, or take to the garden
• Rive Gauche
  • Luxembourg Garden
  • Pantheon
    • (Probably just walk past it)
  • Saint Germain
• Cheese and Wine Tasting Tour
• Hotel Check In
• Dinner
• Musée d'Orsay (Night tickets booked)
• Eiffel Tower At Night

Friday

• Breakfast
  • Beccutti Bar
• Louvre Tour (GetYourGuide) booked : 9:00am - 12pm
• Lunch
  • Kodomari Ramen - Yokocho
• Walk through the Tuilierie Garden
• Champs Elysees
  • Guerlain (Perfume shop)
  • Ladurée (macarons)
• Eiffel Tower
  • Trocadero
  • Picnic
• Rue Cler Marketplace
• Dinner
  • Il Sorrentino
• Go to the top of Arc de Triomph (if time)
• Seine River Cruise: https://www.bateaux-mouches.fen/reservation/tickets

Saturday

• Montmartre
  • Breakfast
    • Hardware Society
  • Rue Des Martyrs
  • Walk up Rue La Vieuville towards Sacre Couer
  • Painter’s Square (Place du Tertre)
  • Sacre Coeur
    • Sinking House on Rue Margaux
• Lunch
  • Undecided where
• Printenps
• Galeries Lafayette
  • Rooftop bar worth going in
• 59 Rivoli
• Dinner
  • Old Shalimar

Sunday

• Bastille Market
  • Breakfast
• Place des Vosges
• l'île St Louis
  • Ice Cream at Berthillon
• Notre Dame
  • Walk around, maybe go inside
• Shakespeare & Co Bookstore
• Lunch
  • Chez Alain Miam Iam
• Marais
  • Marche Des Enfants Rouges
• 59 Rivoli
  • (IF MISSED THE DAY BEFORE)
• Le Scentre Pompido
  • Go to the top for a view
  • Dinner here?
    • L’ais Du Falafel

Monday

• Palace of Versailles?
  • Can rent a golf cart
• Rodin Museum?
  • The looker
• Things we missed from previous days?
• Fly home in the afternoon

Recently, I gave some advice about playing the Lannisters, and someone asked for further advice because they struggle to play Lannisters. It’s hard to do something like that in a concise package, but luckily, I like to write. I do it recreationally, and will write about subjects I'm interested in, delete the works afterward because the writing helps me put my thoughts on paper. I happen to have some such essays analyzing the Lannister army!
Mileage varies, and how you feel about some units or strategies in this game is going to depend a lot on how you feel towards reckless gambling. This is most true of the Lannisters, who revolve so much around unreliable mechanics that I earnestly think at this point that it’s part of their doctrine. It seems to me, that the idea behind the Lannisters, is that they’re broken. They’re full of abilities that don’t work, or that only work when you get lucky, or that only work if your opponent does something stupid. It’s up to you, as the person building the list, to figure out how to take those mechanics and make them function in spite of themselves. The way I see it, you can play the Lannisters as Cersei, by throwing dice at ridiculous odds that only rarely turn up in your favor, or you can play as Tywin, by making safe, calculated choices that will achieve the specific results you want.

• The Cards

Potential Fixes: Always run Tyrion, Giant of Lannister
The first problem we run into with all Lannisters is that their main card deck is bad. People will jump in and tell you that some other deck is worse. I’m not saying the Lannisters are necessarily the worst deck, but I am telling you that you could play five unique Lannister cards in a single round, and not see any results. They can all fail via random dice rolls. In my opinion, in a tactics game where a single turn makes a huge difference, in a card game where a single card changes the flow of the game, that is pretty bad. That’s not a situation you want to find yourself in if you like winning games, or even if you just like having fun.
So five cards. That’s half of your deck. That means that at the start of the game, the odds are pretty good you’re going to draw one or two cards that might not provide any benefit at all. The only thing you can do about this is get rid of them. Don’t wait for the perfect timing to play Hear Me Roar. If you keep it in your hand until you opponent is down by two ranks and you can sink in a unit with Vicious so as to maximize your odds, that card might be blocking up your hand for three to six rounds, and then your opponent might still roll boxcars. Play it, discard it, just get rid of it. You do not want those cards wasting space in your hand.
Four cards always need to go right away: A Lannister Pays His Debts, Hear Me Roar, Bribery, and Subjugation of Power. These cards all have the chance of either doing nothing, or are so weak they may as well be nothing. If they stay in your hand, they’re inflicting an opportunity cost – that is, there’s another card waiting behind Hear Me Roar to be drawn. If you keep these cards in your hand, you are preventing yourself from getting the better card, so always get rid of these cards, either by playing them, or by discarding at the end of the round. You may find some nice spots to play them – and that’s great! Bribery, in particular, can be noted as a lifesaver if Wealth has already been covered and you need to slow down a hard-hitter. However, that’s part of the trap: these cards can be good in the right circumstances, but it’s difficult to create the circumstances in which they are useful, so if those circumstances don’t exist now, you should get rid of the cards and look for better ones.
You may notice I said there were five cards that can do nothing. The fifth one is Counterplot, and its design is… elective, to seek a kindly neutral word. It’s a counter-card, which means it is useful, but they designed it so that it has a chance to fail on a dice roll of 1 or 2. You can mitigate that by holding Wealth and Crown, but that’s a tactical askance, and your opponent could play a powerful card on the first turn, so in reality you don’t have very much control over the success of this card. To be blunt, that makes Counterplot a very weak card.
People get up in arms if you say it, but it is. It’s a weak card. First, it’s reactionary, which means it only works if your opponent does something to trigger it – playing a card – which means your opponent has more control of it than you do. Second, the card can only be as valuable as the card it blocks, which means if you use it to block something lame, then Counterplot was also lame. That means you might feel compelled to hold the card until you see a very powerful card, such as Assault Orders, but if you do that, Counterplot creates an opportunity cost that isn’t caused by Assault Orders. Assault Orders is a very powerful card which so good, most players will use it in the round that they draw it, whereas you’d be holding Counterplot, blocking your own hand, for as many rounds as it takes for your opponent to draw Assault Orders. Finally, because it has a failure chance, you might wait for Assault Orders, fail your Counterplot roll, and then be hit by the enemy card anyway, which meant Counterplot weakened you by wasting space in your hand, and then didn’t do anything. That is a bad card.
So you need to play Counterplot earlier than later. You may want to use it on Assault Orders, but you have no control over that, and you can’t know when your opponent is going to draw it. You don’t want your hand to be blocked by Counterplot for multiple rounds, waiting for the ideal opportunity, and you definitely don’t want to do that and then roll a 1. Just play Counterplot on any card that would reasonably benefit your opponent. If they play Assault Orders right afterward, then c’est la vi; you cannot know what cards they’ll have, nor when they’ll play them, nor if Counterplot will even work. Just don’t hold on to Counterplot long enough that the card begins to hurt you.
The fix for this? Always play Tyrion, Giant of Lannister. It’s an attachment that lets you discard two cards and then search your deck for any specific card you’d like. In a deck like the Lannisters, where half your cards have a chance to do nothing at all (and those odds of achieving nothing are close to 50% on the Panic-related cards), you will frequently find yourself with two cards in your hand that might not do anything. Tyrion lets you discard those, and then draw a useful card that does do something. For the Lannisters, that is huge. Without Tyrion, you find yourself suffering through multiple rounds with dead hands, where none of the cards do anything, and your opponent will be pounding you with their own deck. With him, it’s not up to luck, you know your hand will contain at least one good card each round, for as long as Tyrion is still on the field.

• The Units

Having mentioned Tyrion, Giant of Lannister, it’s worth noting he only costs one point. During a casual conversation between players, one of them asked, “Why is Tyrion only one point? Counterstrategy is really good, and Battle Plan changes how they play their deck.” The response from the Lannister players was, in a nutshell, “My infantry sucks, bro.”
A lot of Lannister infantry sucks. They’re very frequently broken to start with because they’re given unreliable abilities, and to get them working, you have to attach something specific to them. Tyrion, Giant of Lannister would be amazing in a unit of Silenced Men, but he does nothing to fix the boondoggle that is the Honor Guard, so it’s hard to get Tyrion to the front lines and have the unit be functional at the same time. As a result, as good as Counterstrategy may be, you often find it stuck in something holding objectives at the back of the field.
That is the core essence of building Lannister army lists. Once you understand that your objective is to fix a broken and screwed up army, everything comes together better. You have to expect you won’t get what’s printed on the unit’s card, unless you take an attachment or specific commander who makes the unit work, and that’s what we’ll focus on in this section.
Gregor, the Mountain that Rides
Potential Fixes: NA
Starting with the cheapest units, Gregor is often taken because he’s only four points, and he can pack a surprising wallop if you’re lucky with the dice. With only three attacks, sometimes he flubs them all, sometimes he punches above average. He dies easily, he will die, but he will give your opponent plenty of reasons to want to kill him. Unfortunately, he’s not viable against Free Folk nor Night’s Watch, because siege units can instantly kill him on round one from across the board, so if you play competitively, make sure he’s not in both of your lists.
Poor Fellows
Potential Fixes: No
Poor fellows are just cheap bodies. They stand on an objective and try to stay out of the fight, and that’s it. They can’t really fight, their armor is paper thin, but because they can heal themselves, they will bounce back from minor harassment and won’t be chipped to death. The best way to run them is naked, or not at all.
Stone Crows
Potential Fixes: No
These guys are an alternative to Poor Fellows that might weather direct attacks a little better, but that will die more quickly to Panic. You can put Tyrion, Giant of Lannister in them for “free”, but it’s like a JC Penny discount where the sale never ends, because it’s not really a sale and the cost of Tyrion is obviously built into this unit. Putting anything besides Tyrion in them would be a pointless disaster.
Lannister Guardsmen
Potential Fixes: Mandon Moore
When new players look at Guardsmen, usually the first thing they note is “Lannister Supremacy” and think about how much damage that might do. Don’t focus on that – it’s an unreliably ability. Instead, look at their 4” movement and their six attacks with a 4+ to hit. This unit is excruciatingly passive. They can’t proactively threaten anything, they can’t easily get to a good position (which means it’d be hard to get them on a center objective), and finally, their ability only kicks off if the opponent was foolish enough to attack them with something that couldn’t wipe the Guardsmen out.
There’s not really anything practical you can do to fix this unit, because they’re really not reaching a five-point value in the first place, and they’re too slow. I’ve seen less experienced players recommend putting Assault Veterans in them to make the Panic Test from Lannister Supremacy more effective, but that doesn’t solve the issue of the Guardsmen being passive - of them being more under your opponent’s control than your own.
However, for kind of a fun fix, you can put Mandon Moore in them, and at that point they have Sundering, they’re hitting on a 3+, have 3+ armor, and archers won’t want to pick on them. It’s not competitive because Mandon compels you to run Joffrey, and Joffrey is a point too expensive, and the unit will still be slow, and they don’t have a great attack profile, but it is kind of fun to have some bargain bin Honor Guard on the field.
Lannister Halberdiers
Potential Fixes: None needed
This is one of the few Lannister units that comes pre-assembled with working abilities and everything. You don’t have to fix them! For that reason, if you’re not shy on points, this is one of the units many players will put Tyrion in.
I think one of the most notable facets of the Halberdiers is that they illustrate how much a good offense creates a good defense. Other players don’t ever seem to respect Guardsmen because the Guardsmen aren’t going to initiate anything on their own, but most players try to avoid running their light cavalry directly into a unit of Halberdiers. They’d take wounds on the way in, and if the Halberdiers haven’t activated, they’ll be wounded again when the Halberdiers attack. If you put Kevan or Bronn in these guys, then that’s even more opportunities to punish any would-be charge.
Basically, if you want a defensive unit, Halberdiers are your best friends. Lannisters have many “defensive” options to choose from, but this is one of the only choices that is actually good at defense rather than being simply passive.
Gold Cloaks
Potential Fixes: No
Kind of like Guardsmen but easier to kill, this is another passive unit with reactive abilities that mostly only benefit itself, if it benefits anything. The main draw for them is their “Laws of the Realm” Order, which reduces the number of ranks the enemy can use to attack. If this ability were long range, they’d be reasonable – of course, it’s not.
Gold Cloaks are pretty fragile, and their abilities are short range; “Oppressive Peacekeeping” incidentally requires controlling Crown, which makes it a tactical dud. Regardless, having a bunch of short range abilities necessitates that this unit be as close to the front lines as possible, where it absolutely cannot survive. A 4+ save, with only 7+ morale, makes these guys a pretty good target for a free victory point. Unfortunately, there’s not really anything too practical that can be done about this, because adding to the cost of this unit is generally only going to make it worse.
On the note of free victory points, I sometimes see players saying things like, “If the enemy attacks my useless units, then I win, because they have wasted their turn.”
This is pretty poor tactical thinking. You should assume that if your opponent kills your Gold Cloaks, it’ll be for a good reason. You can also assume they’ll be very easy to kill, because they are.
Mountain’s Men
Potential Fixes: Roose commander, Assault Veterans, Addam commander, Redcloak assistance, Daario commander, Bronn
Mountain’s Men might be one of the more famously non-working units the Lannisters can field, but unlike Guardsmen or Gold Cloaks, they’re at least not passive dead weight. The main problem with them is that their good abilities – Critical Blow and hitting on 3+ - are conditional.
They also have Vicious and Prey on Fear, and I can see how somebody thought this was a strong combination in theory. In practice, Vicious is the weakest keyword in the game, affecting the outcome of an attack only about 20% of the time. Even with Vicious, the odds of an opponent failing their Panic Test is roughly 50% or less, and I’ve had plenty of games with these guys where their attacks never gained them any wounds back. To make matters worse, once they lose one rank, they only have five attack dice. On turns when they have less ranks than the enemy and the enemy passes their Panic Test, Mountain’s Men are closer to being worth four points than they are to six. All those words on the card don’t count for much when they don’t do anything!
Luckily, there are some things you can do that make Mountain’s Men fun to play with, though not competitive. First, you can lean into the Panic stuff, which is only pragmatic here because Vicious and Prey on Fear are the abilities you know the unit will always have. An Assault Vet can help with this, but isn’t ideal because it increases the price of the Mountain’s Men when they’re already struggling to be worth their value. Instead, you can run Roose as a commander and place him in them. Unfortunately, the Panic approach still relies a lot on luck, and even with the extra -1 on all Panic Tests, you can’t guarantee you’ll get healing when you need it, as the -3 penalty will only impact about a third of any Panic Test.
If you run Red Cloaks alongside the Mountain’s Men, you can increase the odds of getting a benefit from Prey on Fear. Doing this with Roose attached means inflicting an extra wound of damage and increasing the odds of success, but you’ll need to lead very aggressively with the Mountain’s Men to make sure they’re the ones primarily engaged, rather than the Red Cloaks. Red Cloaks are also suboptimal in a lot of ways – but we’ll get to them in a second.
Your alternative here is to try to increase the general fighting effectiveness and survivability of the unit. Since Bronn increases the defense and morale of a unit while you hold Wealth, he can increase the Mountain’s Men to a 3+ save with 5+ morale. Though that is nice, it is also the case that most 7-point units already have 5+ morale by default, along with a better overall profile than the Mountain’s Men have, so once again, adding cost to the unit is only making it worse at the same rate it makes them better. For that reason, you can try adding Daario to the unit, and can use Daario’s “Sellsword Negotiations” card to keep them up to ranks. Additionally, Daario lets them attack with all seven attacks when you hold Wealth. Finally, you can try putting Addam Marbrand in the unit, which will make the Mountain’s Men a little tougher to kill off while also letting them use cards like Valiant Example to get them immediately back up to higher ranks.
None of these fixes are good. The problem with most of them is that they add cost to the unit, require a suboptimal commander, or suffer from adding more conditional complexity to the unit. However, some of these fixes are at least fun and patch some of the problems the unit has… a little.
Crossbowmen
Potential Fixes: Sparrow commander, Bronn
Lannister Crossbows are a perfectly fine ranged unit. They do exactly what you’d expect: shoot enemies. Their only real flaw is that they have 7+ morale, which seems quite fair given they have 4+ armor – which is a lot for a ranged unit. Many players like to run Bronn in these guys, which raises them to a 3+ save with 6+ morale when you claim Wealth. In fact, this combo and the ease of finding targets for your Crossbows make them the most optimal place to put Bronn.
Sparrow also provides a +1 to morale, which means that Crossbows are a fine place for him to sit if you prefer not to place him somewhere else. Sparrow’s “Incite” ability is basically nothing, so it’s not missing out on much to ignore it, and his cards can be applied to any unit on the field.
Red Cloaks
Potential Fixes: Mandon Moore, Gregor commander
Red Cloaks are like a multi-role unit that forgot it was supposed to have more than one role. They can inflict a Panic Test on anything in long range by taking an action, and this occurs every time they take an action, which is a neat mechanic, but it’s also the only thing they do by default. It sounds powerful, but it’s important to remember that attacking a unit will inflict a Panic Test, so if you shoot a unit with a crossbow, they’ll first take damage from the crossbow, and then take a Panic Test. When you factor in the revelation that Red Cloak Panic Tests only succeed a little over half the time, and that only when the Red Cloak unit is at full ranks, you realize they’re just not that good.
People occasionally think to put Preston Greenfield in these guys, but the answer to the problem isn’t to use more activations to spam more Panic Tests. What you need, is to give the unit a second role – that is, melee combat ability, and you can do that by putting Gregor or Mandon Moore in them. Once the unit can actually fight, you can throw it into combat, force a Panic Test before their attack, do a decent amount of damage, then force a Panic Test after the attack.
Although this does patch one major issue with Red Cloaks, they still have a few things going on preventing them from holding up. For one, their attack profile isn’t great: when they lose a rank, they fall to five attacks and their Panic ability weakens. They also only have a 4+ to hit by default, which makes Mandon the more appealing fix since he’ll get them to a 3+, though that does make them cost more. Additionally, the entire unit winds up being wrapped up in needing Crown to function at all, which forces you to play Joffrey ahead of anything they do, and that’s a massive liability.
The Crown liability is one problem you just can’t get around. Needing to play an NCU ahead of the unit to make it worth more than four points in value makes them clunky in a way that a lot of other units don’t have to deal with.
City Watch
Potential Fixes: No
What we’re looking at with the City Watch is a unit that has pretty much the same profile as the Lannister Halberdiers, but they can only get Sundering for one turn and they don’t have Set for Charge. If you want what the City Watch is doing at this price, then you’re better off taking Halberdiers and adding an attachment to them. These guys are easily no more than a five-point value, and even then they’d be outclassed by a lot of other five-point units. For example, a cheaper replacement for these guys is to take some Stormcrow Mercenaries and choose an attachment that grants Sundering.
House Clegane Brigands
Potential Fixes: None needed
Light cavalry. It works! They are a bit fragile, but given their solid maneuverability, this is best dealt with by player skill rather than by slapping any attachments on them. That’s not to say there’s anything wrong with throwing attachments on them, as all the options work perfectly well on these guys. There are only three, after all, but they’re all solid attachments. Their Panic-related ability is going to be as flaky as those things always are, so when you decide to charge a unit, do it based on the performance you expect from their basic attack, not on what you hope might happen if the enemy fails the Panic Test.
Pyromancers
Potential Fixes: Bronn, Sandor, Addam commander, Kevan commander
Here’s a unit I would have no idea how to balance! Every attack ignores armor, and they have both melee and short ranged options to do this, with seven attacks at a 3+ to hit and a profile of 7, 7, 4. Positively every unit in the game has something to fear here, and yet, with only a 6+ save, the Pyromancers have something to fear from every other unit on the field. Dangerous to any one unit, and in danger from four or more units at a time. That means the odds are usually against them, since the opponent has quite a lot of incentive to kill these guys off, and anything on the board generally has the wherewithal to do that.
Using Bronn increases the unit’s armor while giving them a valuable extra attack, with the extra attack being the most notable thing you can do since a “DPS race” is pretty much one of the only options this unit has. Kevan is also valuable for the same reason, and his Wealth of the Rock card can be thrown out for a little extra defense. If you can combine Bronn and Kevan’s card, then for at least two attacks, the Pyromancers can have 4+ defense! That is, of course, a highly situational play that you can’t depend on. Placing Kevan in them and using Crown for a free charge is liable to produce better mileage, as it leaves open a bit more room to safely maneuver.
Addam also does alright in the Pyromancers thanks to a smidge of added tankiness, some healing from his cards, and the potential to play Lash Out when the unit takes a really bad hit (which is all the more wounds the enemy can’t stop). Normally, Addam’s biggest problem is that the enemy will try to ignore whatever he’s in to avoid triggering his nonsense, but they can’t ignore Pyromancers.
Sandor has some potential in these guys, but doesn’t do enough. He might heal two or three wounds after the Pyromancers attack, but as soon as the opponent shoots everything they’ve got at the unit, it’ll be dead before Sandor can heal them again. Plus, Sandor doesn’t work when they make a ranged attack, and his “vulnerable” effect is a bit wasted when the unit he assaults doesn’t get armor saves anyway. Ramsay Snow breaks on the exact same failure point of too much damage, not enough healing, only he costs more, so I don’t rate Ramsay even as a casual fix. The Panic stuff is not reliable and isn’t worth considering.
Still, no matter what you do, this unit is going to draw a ton of attention, and short of straight up killing whatever’s turned on it, it’s not going to survive what comes to destroy it. “Horrific Visage” is a wet paper bag that’s going to miss about half the time or more, and a 50% shot at a Panic Test is a minor risk to getting the Pyromancers off the field.
While not common, it is worth noting that the Pyromancer attacks “do not permit armor saves”, but they are not instant wounds. That means abilities such as Hardened or Resilient can still block or reduce damage dealt by Pyromancers.
Warrior’s Sons
Potential Fixes: Sparrow commander, Daario commander, Addam commander, Champion of the Faith, Sandor, Gate Warden, Mandon Moore, Bronn, Gregor commander
This is one of the units that I like for certain competitive lists, and that I think make the Lannisters stand out in terms of their faction picks. The trick with them is, they are unreliable, like a lot of Lannister infantry, but it’s on the basis of whether or not they have enough of their “Faith” resource. There are commanders and attachments that help them get more Faith, and as long as you’re using the correct stuff, Warrior’s Sons are pretty good.
The obvious commander here is Sparrow, because every single one of his cards is a morale test, and when you pass them, you can add one more Faith Token to the Warrior’s Sons that took the test. This is great! Because it allows you to use the Warrior’s Sons defense while relying on attachments to give them more kick and survivability. Wrath of the Warrior lets them attack with Sundering and +1 to hit while racking up a Faith Token for later use. Mercy of the Mother brings them back and keeps them going. Protection of the Father buffs their defense by re-rolling armor. If you use Tyrion, you can mill-draw these cards each round and make sure your Warrior’s Sons do what you need them to do.
As long as you have those tokens, you can run Sandor or a Gate Warden to maintain their survivability, or you can run Bronn to occasionally increase their armor and take a free attack. So far so good, but what if you don’t want to run Sparrow? Well, things get a little trickier now.
Addam is a common pick because he makes the unit even harder to kill, but he doesn’t have any good morale-at-will cards. He does have Charismatic Leadership, but it’s reactionary and your opponent would have to make the mistake of targeting the Warrior’s Sons with something to trip it off. Frankly, Addam in the Warrior’s Sons means they’re liable to be ignored. If they don’t generate Faith Tokens, their attacks are a bit mediocre for their cost, so you have a problem there.
Daario has a surprising amount of potential. You can mill-draw Sellsword Bravado to produce Faith Tokens while making the enemy weaker at the same time. Afterward, you can use Faith to get some good attacks, or, if you can claim Wealth, Daario gives the unit’s attacks Sundering. Therefore, any time you hold Wealth, this a pretty strong fighting unit. But wait, there’s more! Sellsword Negotiations can restore the health of the Warrior’s Sons while also having you count as holding Wealth, which is a lovely combo for a front-line unit like this, and I think it makes Daario, Stormcrow Captain the leading candidate to be in a unit of Warrior’s Sons. It is also worth considering that when you play Reckless Strikes, Faith will let you re-roll your attacks, so there’s some potential there, but I don’t recommend it, because the card can also auto-wound the Warrior’s Sons, which undermines their function as a scary, offensive wall.
If you still want to use these guys but don’t want to use Sparrow or Daario as your commander, you can put Mandon Moore in them, and at the drawback of needing to field Joffrey as well, they become a powerful fighter and defender both. They’ll run into trouble on the occasions that they fail their Panic Tests and lose their Faith Tokens, so to mitigate that, it’s usually good to avoid spending Faith while they’re at full ranks. You can wait until they’re on the second or last rank, at which point the Faith tokens have higher value, and spend them then.
Champions of the Faith do generate more Faith Tokens while handing out Vulnerable Tokens, or, if you like gambling, Panicked Tokens. Naturally, there’s also always Gregor, who doesn’t highlight the best parts of the Warrior’s Sons that well, but it does do all the bonkers, this-and-the-kitchen-sink cheese that commanders like Gregor do.
This unit is still okay without any attachments, but mainly just for standing on an objective, which is not the best use of seven points. If you’re going to invest that much, it should be to violently and noisily take something from somebody. The other reason I personally prefer Daario for this is because it won’t cost anything extra to place him in the unit.
Casterly Rock Honor Guard
Potential Fixes: Gregor commander, Daario commander, Meryn Trant, Mandon Moore
It’s so depressing to see so much text on a card, knowing you won’t use any of it. Honor Guard trade Condition Tokens for one-off effects that aren’t better than the Condition Tokens. They expend weakness to get Sundering, which is something most units of their cost might already have. They expend Vulnerable to recover wounds, conditionally based on whether or not the enemy lost a rank. They expend Panicked to remove a unit’s abilities for the turn, and though this one is useful if you’d for some reason put a Panicked Token on the board (probably explicitly for this unit’s ability), it’s not an ability that’s universally valuable because not everything has a defensive ability, and it’s hard to guess if your opponent has a card you want to block.
When you use the ability, the token goes away, so you not only have an issue with needing to set up the effect, but it’s ephemeral. Using NCUs to get the tokens is a problem because that necessitates playing the NCU first, likely broadcasting your intent, and giving your opponent an opportunity to respond. There are attachments that generate tokens, but they only do it once per round, and it’s an opportunity cost to generate a token just to quickly take it away.
In my opinion, the only good attachment that makes this unit work is Gregor as a commander. The unit has decent armor, a decent attack profile, and good morale, so once you give them two automatic wounds, immunity to Weakness, Sundering, and all of Gregor’s cards, they are an imminent threat to everyone. That’s not to say they’re actually good. It’s just that Gregor’s so jacked up that he rescues it.
Meryn Trant can be used as a fix for the Honor Guard because he consistently generates Weakness and Panicked tokens before each attack. You could skip the token thing entirely and go for Mandon Moore, though I think Meryn is better since it gets the ability nullification along with attack re-rolls. However, neither of these choices are great because they increase the cost of the unit, force-include Joffrey, and introduce the Crown confound, where you have to play an NCU before you can play the Honor Guard.
Daario can also pick this unit up with Sellsword Bravado, which will generate Weakness and Panicked before an attack, and while you control Wealth, the unit will have Sundering. However, I think Daario works a bit better in the Warrior’s Sons, because the Warrior’s Sons tend to be tougher on defense and sustain for longer when you’re using Sellsword Negotiations to keep them alive. Warrior’s Sons also have more flexibility with how you expend their Faith tokens, and when they use Sellsword Bravado, they can benefit from their Faith abilities without consuming the Weakness and Panicked tokens. Honor Guard destroy your tokens from the card, Warrior’s Sons construct on the morale test and leave the tokens intact.
Knights of Casterly Rock
Potential Fixes: None Needed
Essentially the premiere unit of the Lannisters, the Knights of Casterly Rock are fast, well-armored, and brutal. There’s not much more to say about them! “Lannister Supremacy” makes them a bit risky to shoot at with archers, and when they attack a unit that isn’t as good at fighting, it can give some nasty shocks, but really it’s the basics that make the Knights as good as they are. Generally it’s not a great idea to run attachments on them because they’re already an eight point unit, and the best thing a player can do for them is provide support.
Notable Neutrals
Though I won’t go into detail on all the Neutral options, there are a few things that deserve to be pointed out.
Bolton Cutthroats are doing basically what the Mountain’s Men are but without the stupid caveats, so if you put Sandor in them to give them Fueled By Slaughter, they cost the same, get 3+ to hit default, have a better attack profile, and heal when they attack instead of when an enemy fails a Panic Test. Not a great unit, but it’s more stable and achieves a similar goal without needing you to also run Red Cloaks, Joffrey, and whatever else.
Stormcrow Mercenaries do well with a few different attachments from the Lannisters. Tyrion most notably, who should really be in these guys if you need a nice, affordable place to put him. The Stone Crows have no advantages over the Stormcrows. It’s not even close, the Stormcrows are better.
Lysense Sellswords can bounce back from a lot of damage if you put Sandor in them. Once they’ve got two pillage tokens on them, every attack is going to restore between three to six wounds. Not bad for six points!
Stormcrow Dervishes with Sandor can also be very resilient. Because they can attack on Wealth, they can make up to three attacks per round (or more if you have Assault Orders), and each attack will heal the unit. Since they can retreat, if you still have your activation, you can take an attack from the Tactics Board, retreat, then charge as your activation, which inflicts Vulnerable from Sandor. That’s just one option – this unit is also no slouch when led by Kevan, who can charge when claiming Crown, retreat, then charge again as his activation. In my opinion, this is the best seven point unit the Lannisters can get if your commander isn’t supporting Warrior’s Sons because the Dervishes have the same armor as most of your options, but unlike your units, these guys are reliable and have consistent abilities.
In Summary of Units
To make this really simple, if you want a competitive list, you should probably be using Halberds, Knights, and Crossbows. You can use Warrior’s Sons if you’re set up for it. Brigands are also alright as light cavalry, but you should be very careful with them since they’re so fragile. Beyond those options, Neutrals are probably a better bet, because Neutrals have abilities that are more stable and will require less set-up.
You might have also noticed a few comments like, “When you play this card, this unit really benefits from it.”
Stuff like that is why Tyrion, Giant of Lannister should be in almost every list you make. Some units are going to be bad no matter what commanders or attachments you put in them, but they do get better and are more fun to play if you combo them with specific cards. That doesn’t work if those cards are at the bottom of your deck and you’re stuck drawing dysfunctional duds like Hear Me Roar.

Just as the title says! Recently bought a Velotric Discover 1 and looking for recommendations for accessories, specifically bags for the back rack. I have my eye on a couple REI panniers but wanted to see what folks have enjoyed the most. What’s been the most bang for your buck?

I was invited by a friend to play a round of golf at Winged Foot with his bachelor party. I have had a Dunlop set for over 10 years and probably golf once a year, which usually means I'm shooting around 100.
I sold that cheap set last summer but have yet to get new clubs. What are some drivers, irons, and putters that were top-of-the-line years ago but now discounted? I have a Golf Galaxy near me and would go there to buy clubs if that helps.
Price range: I'm not looking for crazy but for a bag and all the clubs I'm willing to spend, I dunno, $800?

Hello all! I plan on going to a couple flea markets and yard sales this summer and this will be my first time selling! I am looking for advice on pricing. I will mainly be selling clothes, purses, and shoes. NWT, NWOT, and used. I have sizes ranging from xs-4x. A lot of mall brands such as american eagle, hollister, etc. I have a lot of target and walmart brands as well. I don't want to individually price every item because I have hundreds of items. I was wondering if I should do certain racks/tables/bins certain prices or make specific items a set price(ex: all dresses, x amount of $) or if I should just make all clothes one price, all shoes one price, and all bags one price. Also what would you suggest I price items at? I know people will haggle so I am prepared for that but I want a base idea of what I should be pricing things. Any other advice about flea markets or yard sales in general is welcome as well! Thank you so much in advance! 😁
Edit: I am in Southeast Pennsylvania about an hour and a half(55ish miles) northwest of Philly if that helps since I know pricing sometimes depends on region!

Link to original nosleep post:
https://www.reddit.com/nosleep/comments/1atvnh2/i_ended_up_in_the_lost_and_found_at_the_end_of/
It was around 2am on a Thursday, when I must have dozed off on the subway, after a double shift at work.
I had done it a few times before, always waking up to the bright lights of the subway car just a few stops too far, only to have to hop off and wait for a train going back in the other direction.
But this time, I woke up to...
...Darkness.
What the? Where am I? I thought to myself, before inspecting my surroundings.
And as my eyes adjusted, I realized that I was still on the train car, its lights turned off, parked at the end of the line.
Fuck!
I hopped out of my seat and ran to the doors, but they were all locked.
So I started pounding on them and screaming, "Help! Help!"
And after a minute of silence...
...I saw a bouncing light approaching.
To my relief, it was a train worker, wearing a yellow vest and carrying a flashlight, as he walked along the platform outside.
I kept yelling louder and louder, until he must have finally noticed me, shining his flashlight through the window and directly into my face.
"Help! Please!" I called out, as he reached into his pocket, removed a set of keys, and opened the doors.
"Thank you!" I cried out, so happy to be rescued that I nearly gave him a great big hug.
"Got yourself lost, did you?" The train worker asked, as he finished relocking the doors and turned back to me.
He was a tall, older man, with a heavy build and a weathered face.
"Yeah, I must have fallen asleep." I replied, before surveying my surroundings...
...Sure enough, I was at the end of the line after all. All around us, I saw countless darkened trains lined up along different tracks, and not a soul in sight.
"Wow, I've never seen the end of the line before." I said, distracted by the sight.
"Not many have. No reason to really." He replied.
"Fair point. So... what's the best way to get out of here?"
"Oh , don't worry, I'll escort you out. Wouldn't want you getting lost twice in one night." He chuckled.
"Thank you. I really appreciate it."
"Right this way." The train worker said, as he guided me down the platform and into an adjacent building that presumably led to the street.
But when we got inside, it started to feel as though he was leading me further into the structure.
"Um, isn't that the way out?" I asked nervously, pointing to a hallway with a neon red exit sign.
"Last I checked, you were the one who got lost. Trust me." He reassured me.
A minute or so later, when we still hadn't left the building, I stopped and asked, "Seriously. Where are you taking me?"
"To the lost and found." He said, his face betraying no emotion.
"Lost and found?"
"Trust me. You'll see."
In that moment, I knew something was off, and, looking back at it, I should have made a run for it right then and there...
...But for some reason, I wanted to know what he meant, and decided to keep following him.
And when we arrived at our destination, I finally understood what he meant by "lost and found."
There, at the end of the hallway, was a large cage, containing about ten poor souls, each of which looking sickly, emaciated, and exhausted.
"This is the lost and found." The train worker said, before opening the door and gesturing for me to enter.
A wave of panic washed over me, and I tried to run away...
...But he immediately caught my shoulder, dragged me back over, and tossed me into the cage...
SLAM.
...Before slamming its door and walking away.
I looked around at the others, to find them simply sitting there in silence, staring at me.
Only one of them had the energy to greet me. "Welcome to the end."
He was a thin, bald man, wearing a suit that must have been new when he got here, but was now tattered.
"The end of what?" I asked.
"Of the train tracks. And, well... everything else, I suppose." He explained.
"What in the world goes on here?" I asked, still shaking in fear.
"All we know is that every day or two, he brings someone to the cage, and they pick one of us to take away. What happens after that, is anyone's guess... because no one's ever come back."
"Wait, what?"
"Oh, and I'm Phil by the way."
"Ryan."
"Nice to meet you, Ryan. Sorry it had to be under these circumstances."
I spent the rest of the night lying silently in the cage, curled up in its far corner in fetal position, until I eventually passed out from exhaustion.
Sure enough, when I woke up the next day, the train worker had returned with a stranger, just as Phil had warned.
"Pick one." Our captor said to the nondescript man, who turned to the cage, and took a good look at every single one of its prisoners...
...Before taking a moment to decide.
Please not me. Please not me. I thought to myself, as I tried to lessen my posture, and did my best to hide away in the back of the cage.
And then, the stranger made his decision...
"I'll take that one."
...Pointing to someone in the front.
Phew. I thought to myself, before feeling sorry for the poor sucker.
The train worker then opened the door to the cage, pulled the unlucky prisoner out, locked the door again, and carried the chosen man off down the hallway.
My strategy of hiding myself away in the back of the cage, and thus avoiding getting picked, had worked.
So I stuck to that plan, every couple days or so, when the train worker returned with a new stranger.
But eventually, the number of prisoners began to dwindle, and one night, one of the men that the train worker brought to the cage...
...Chose me.
At least I'll finally know where they've been taking them. I thought to myself, before the train worker grabbed me by the collar, and dragged me down the hallway with the man.
A little while later, we arrived at a small room, which at first, appeared to be covered in paint...
...But I quickly realized that it wasn't paint at all, but instead a collage of splattered blood, caked on to its once white walls.
The room was otherwise quite sparse, containing only a table at its center...
...And what appeared to be a rack full of weapons in one corner.
Fuck. This is the end.
"Now what?" The stranger asked the train worker, as he gave me a strange look.
"You kill him. That's what." My captor replied.
"But I've never done this before." The man said, nervously.
"Here," The train worker said, before grabbing an ax from the rack and handing it to him. "Try this. It's a favorite."
The stranger took the ax in both of his hands, then looked back at me.
He was a short, rather unimposing man, with glasses and a bald spot.
Had he not already volunteered it was his first time, I would have guessed it anyway, as I could see his teeth chattering, and his hands shaking.
"Here let me get him for you." The train worker said, noticing the stranger's hesitation. He then walked over, picked me up, and threw my torso down onto the table, holding me down, as I flailed my arms, attempting to break free. "Well go on. Do it!"
"Uh... I don't know if I can." The man replied.
"Well just start with one body part then. It'll warm you up. You'll be surprised."
The stranger hesitated for a moment, before taking a step back, then running over, swinging the ax high above his head, and bringing it down on my arm... hacking it clean off.
"AAARGHHHH!"
I started screaming and wailing, as the train work nodded in approval. "Great job. Now finish him off!"
But when he turned back, the stranger was just standing there with wide eyes, in disbelief of what he had just done, ax dangling from his hands. "I... I... I... can't do it."
"Of course you can!" The train worker encouraged, a hint of frustration in his voice, as I nearly passed out on the table, blood pouring out of my amputated arm.
"I'm sorry I can't." The stranger replied, dropping the ax to the floor.
"What do you mean you can't? You paid for this. He's yours. Do it!"
"No, just give me my money back, I don't want to do it anymore."
"But he's no good to me now! You cut his arm off. He's used goods! No one's gonna pick him now." The train worker screamed.
"I don't know." The man whimpered, still torn about what to do next.
"Well make a decision, he's bleeding out all over the table!"
"I'm sorry, I can't! Keep the money!" The stranger finally said, before letting himself out of the room and running off down the hallway.
"Motherfucker." The train worker said to himself, before looking down at me.
But rather than kill me, he instead removed a flamethrower from the rack and torched my arm, cauterizing the wound and knocking me out in the process.
I woke up the next day in the back of the cage with gauze wrapped around what was left of my arm, in the most extreme pain I'd ever felt, save for the pain that I'd felt the day before.
"Take these." The train worker said, tossing me a bag of painkillers through the bars of the cage.
And then it was...
...Back to business as usual, as he continued to bring strangers to the cage every couple days.
But from that point forward, just as the train worker had suspected, whenever he brought them by...
...No one wanted me.
"What about that one?" He would always suggest to the stranger, pointing to me, as I lay there, lifeless and armless in the back.
But every time, the strangers would always decline, saying things like, "No thanks. Looks like someone already had a go at him. I want a fresh one."
As time went on, and more and more people got picked, eventually only Phil and I remained.
"We made it pretty far." My best, and now only, friend in the cage said one night. "Looks like I'm next."
"Don't say that." I said, "There's still hope."
"Hope?" Phil replied.
I stood up, walked over to the cage door, and began to push as hard as I could, before calling back to him. "Help me push it!"
Phil did as I asked, and together, we tried our best to push and push, but the lock was too strong, and ultimately, the door never budged from its hinges.
The next day, when the train worker brought a stranger by and asked him to choose between Phil and myself, I raised my hand and volunteered to go, attempting to buy Phil another day.
But they scoffed at the unsettling condition of my body, and chose my best friend instead, dragging him away down the hallway as he looked back at me and smiled.
And then it was down to me. The one that no one wanted.
I was so unwanted, in fact, that it nearly drove the train worker mad, after having repeatedly failed to get rid of me, over and over and over again.
On one such day, after a stranger had stopped by and left empty handed, the train worker started screaming at me from outside the cage. "You're a pathetic and useless excuse for a prisoner! I should have let you die that day, instead of saving you."
"Well if you had others, you wouldn't have to blame me now would you?" I replied. "What happened to your once steady supply of victims?"
"Beats me. Maybe someone figured it out. Or maybe victims just ain't in season right now."
"Sounds like a supply chain issue to me."
"Maybe. But I'm still left with the question. What do I do with you?"
"Let me go."
"Well I can't do that."
"Why not?"
"'Cause you know too much. Where this place is. What I look like."
"I promise, if you let me go, I won't turn you in. I'll just forget about it."
"Yeah, yeah. That's what they all say. Easy to say now. Then once you're free you start thinking about this place. Thinking of me. And want retribution for what happened to you. Next thing I know, there's a swat team at my door."
"Please."
"Besides, I can't just let you go. The bosses wouldn't be too happy about that."
"Bosses?"
"You know, the people that hired me."
"Hired you? Someone hired you to do this? Who?"
"You think I know? And even if I did, they made me sign an NDA."
"Okay fine don't tell me. Just let me go."
"Nope. If no one takes you in the next week, I'm gonna do it myself."
Sure enough, a week went by without any takers, and the train worker came walking up to the cage, with a smile on his face.
"I'm a man of my word. It's time to put you out of your misery." He said, opening the door and dragging me off, down the hallway, and back into the small room with the table and weapons rack.
When we stepped inside, the train worker instructed me to sit on the table in the center of the room, facing a very specific direction.
"Now don't look back. But the security camera behind you is recording everything. But only video. So if you want to get out of here, I want you to do exactly as I say." He began.
"Um... okay." I replied, not entirely sure where he was going with it.
"Now I'm going to grab a knife from the rack. Then I'm gonna come back over here, and pretend to stab you. After that happens, all I need you to do is play dead. And then I'll carry you out of here, and leave you in the dumpster. You'll wait until dark, at which point in time you can crawl out of it and run away from here. Understood?"
"I guess. But wait. Why are you doing this?"
I shouldn't have asked, but I needed to know.
"Cause I'm getting transferred." The train worker replied, "This lost and found's not meeting their quota. They’re sending me to another and decommissioning this one."
"Wait. There's more of these?" I asked, trying to wrap my mind around what he had just said.
"Yeah. Lots of them."
"But why not just free me? What's with the theatrics?"
"Cause they told me to finish you off. And they're watching."
"And why not just kill me then? Not that I want that."
"Cause I ain't no killer, kid. A facilitator maybe, but I don't got it in me to go through with it myself."
"Uh... I don't know what to say. Thank you?"
"Don't mention it. Now, before we commence. Any other questions."
"Yeah," I said, looking him in the eye. "What's your name?"
"Dave." He said, with a smile.
"Ryan."
"Nice to meet ya, Ryan. And apologies for the arm, and what you went through here. It's just business."
"Sure," I said with a smile of my own, as I began to realize that I probably had Stockholm Syndrome.
Nevertheless, I trusted him, and went along the plan in full, and he was, as he had promised, a man of his word.
Later that day, as soon as I saw the daylight turn to darkness through the crack between the garbage bin and its lid, I did as he instructed, crawling out of the dumpster and running as fast as I could to the nearest sign of civilization... a gas station a few streets away.
After I told my story to the police, they raided the building at the end of the line, but just as my captor had told me, the place had been fully decommissioned, its cage removed and blood-splattered room now clean.
It took me a little while to get readjusted to the outside world, the real world again, and acclimated to life with just one arm, but I got good at typing with one hand pretty quick.
Now whenever I take the train, I set an alarm for the time it'll take me to get to my stop, even though I know I could never fall asleep on the train again.
And every now and then, when I look at the subway map and see the last stop, I think about Dave, and wonder where all those other lost and found locations might be.

Here's a (long) recap of my first strongman meet, Kansas Strongest Man & Woman 2024 hosted at Strong Barbell Club, April 13th, competed in the Novice category.
TL;DR had fun, met cool people, finished the meet 8/11.
Just as a quick background, I am 36 year old guy from Argentina, who started working out in his early 30s to be able to carry more weight and be better prepared for the field season (I'm a paleontologist), and also due to watching Brian, Martins and Juji on youtube back in the day. Before turning 30 I had no sport background except for occasional jogs and soccer matches with friends in my early 20s. I'm 5'7" (170 cms) and was around 188 pounds for the meet, my heaviest ever, normally around 180. Been living in the US for two years.
Events
Event 1: 400lbs farmers walk followed by a standing arm over arm with a sled+250lbs, 50ft. Had farmers to practice. Had a small sled but a short rope.
Event 2: Silver dollar deadlift for max, 3 attempts to find your max. Used blocks to practice.
Event 3: weight for height 28lbs (highlands game style), rising bar, 3 attempts, but if you fail you are out. Practiced with a kettlebell and a cheap pvc structure.
Event 4: 165lbs log for reps in 60 seconds. Had no log, managed to use one around 5 times a couple of weeks before the meet.
Event 5: sandbag and keg over bar medley. 200lbs keg followed by 200 bag followed by 225 keg and 245 bag. Had two sandbags, one 175lbs and the other 225. No keg.
Goals: 1) actually compete, been a fan of the sport for quite some time; 2) have some fun; 3) meet some other strongman people; 4) finish the meet with no injuries; 5) not zero more than one event.
Training: it went well, got around 13 weeks to prepare. The first 4 were basic strength training (squats, deadlifts, presses, rows, rdl) at high reps and lots of accessories for some hypertrophy work, almost no event training there. After that I started a strength block for 6 weeks, with a deload week somewhere in the middle. I lowered the number of reps and increased weight progressively each week until I reached some heavy triples, practiced most of the events (or at least as close to them as possible) at least once a week. Finally, I did two weeks of events only training including a mock meet at around 90% of comp weight. Final week was a deload, no cut was necessary since there was a unique novice category.
Meet day: had a normal breakfast (yogurt, fruit, eggs, coffee, took some creatine just in case), brought a couple of sandwiches, crackers, plenty of fruits, water, and gatorade to the meet.
Event 1: I was hoping for this to be a good event because I prepared quite well for the farmers, although not that well for the arm over arm because I only had a short rope. Sadly, when I was starting to get my grip on the farmers I kind of looked up and I hear someone say go! I wasn't sure if it was for me because I wasn't ready at all, so look at my judges and yes, the go signal was for me, so I started quite late and in a bad position, no brace, etc. I finished the run without drops and went to the arm over arm; things went relatively well until middle of the way when my grip started to fail me, but finished nonetheless. Bad result for my first event ever haha, position 10/11. But just laughed at what happened. Two things to get better at: paying more attention to the judges and more grip endurance.
Event 2: I was hoping to end up middle of the table but went better than expected, my best conventional deadlift was around 485. I understood what worked best for me just before the event while testing the setup (start really slow so that the whip doesn't move me all over the place), I think I went 440lbs (to be extra sure), 485 and a whopping 572. Super happy with the last pull and I even think I had over 600 in me. Got the 2nd heaviest weight and tied for 3rd/11.
Event 3: the implement at the meet felt completely different to the kettlebell due to the chain and its overall length, was grazing the ground with my swing. At home I went up to 15 feet, so I decided to jump to the event at 11ft and cleared it, skipped 12ft (error), and went for 13ft, but I failed miserably, not in height but trajectory, didn't went over the bar. Disappointing result but what are you going to do, shared 9th/11, onto the next one. One thing I did quite wrong was to stand directly in the sun for like an hour seeing other categories and waiting for my turn, stupid in hindsight. Shoutout to Mason to whom I talked a bit about practicing with a kettlebell and how different it felt.
Event 4: I've split jerked 210 in the past (did weightlifting for like 8 months) and push pressed comp weight for 5/6 reps in 60secs, but all of that with a barbell. Log was a different story, never really got the hang of it until my 5th and final session using one, where I barely managed 140lbs for one. During the comp I split-jerked the first rep no problem, although the split was horrendous, tried a second rep and failed, but managed to re-rack and after a split/push jerk/press fight I got a second rep. I thought I was short in time and didn't try a 3rd one. In reality I had more than enough time, but I never practiced with a timer, another thing to improve. 9/11. Another thing to improve would be getting a log to practice.
Event 5: didn't have much faith in me due to never touching a keg, but asked for some advice from a great guy to whom I talked in several occasions during the day, I think his name is Michael, thank you man! Did the first keg no problem (!) went to the sandbag and cleared it, then to the second keg and I gave it my all but couldn’t load it over the bar, was super close, no more than an inch away. 9/11. Biceps were mega bruised the next day due to the kegs.
Ended up 8/11, a little disappointed on my placement but just a little, was mostly happy to finally compete. I know I can do much better, and I'll do it next time.
Met some really cool people (hardest part for me, super introverted guy) thanks to a weightlifter friend of mine that came with me and helped me during the day, and especially helped me socialize haha.
Finally experienced the camaraderie of strongman, it was great, everyone cheering for the rest, giving tips to the novice like me. There was a kids category and seeing them compete and seeing everyone cheering for them at the top of their lungs was really wholesome. My friend was really impressed with the camaraderie part, he said he didn't experience that in his weightlifting meets.
Enormous shoutout to the organizers, helpers and everyone involved, thank you so much, the meet ran super smoothly (maybe except for the weight for height, but those things just consume a lot of time) and was a great experience overall.
Hope to be able to compete again in the future, maybe next year since I'm moving away for a few months now and won't be able to train much. So long and thanks for the fish.

I have been thinking about getting into disc golf for awhile and finally picked up my first discs on Friday, and have been messing with them in the back yard.
Finally got out for the first round yesterday for Mothers Day with my mom (her first ever as well). We did a 'Blue' square on UDisc since the only closeby Green circle wasn't maintained as good (long uncut grass).
We did 9 holes mostly par 3's with the last being a 4, and ended up with +16 / +17.
Onto the disc selection, they were bought from my local discshop / skateshop (they sell Skate and Snowboards, clothing, and added Discs in the past 5-10 years).

• GStar Hawkeye 173.5g
• Star Roc3 176g
• XT Xero 164g

Are these discs suitable to continue learning and improving on, or are they a little much in terms of weight?
I've been looking into straighter flying mids like the Mako 3 (probably in Star plastic) and a PutteApproach with a little more fade like the Aviar in DX Plastic. Will probably get a cheap 10-12 disc bag as well.

[TOMT] can’t remember YouTube true crime video
I’ve been looking for this video for ages now and can’t seem to remember it, I’ll give a brief description of what I remember.
A woman (somewhere in the US i think) was killed and her body was never found. I have it in my head the area this took place was kind of like alpine forests…
The main thing I remember and probably the most descriptive thing I can provide is that some old man on YouTube made these cryptic videos that sort of surround the murder. The one I remembered is a picture of this strange face whose eye turns blue on one side. The face matched up to a map of this golf course at some sort of recreational centre somewhere in this alpine area. The flashing eye matches up to one of the holes on the map of thegolf course and the body of this woman was rumoured to be buried under the hole.
I think this YouTube channel’s name was something like old dirt bag or filth bag.

Special thanks to u/SpacePaladin15 for creating the NoP universe.
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I'd also like to thank u/xskipy10 for their awesome fanart of the main cast as well as their recent Tohba meme and their fanart of Michael baysitting. You're work is a treasure!
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Thank you as well to u/Accomplished-Golf-59 for his take on Michael, Teylim, and Tohba in his submission for the Banner Art Contest, and u/Spacer_Catgirl4969 for their awesome music video featuring a pixel-art Dohkar in his bar. Be sure to give ALL of these awesome creators your love and support.
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And let's not forget u/Guywhoexists2812 who has been an awesome source of memes as well as sick pixel art, such as THIS and THIS!!!! And even THIS!!!!!! And how could I forget THIS!!!!!!!!!! Thank you so much!
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Today, we join Khornel and Michael as they prepare for yet another protest show as they continue the fight against those abusing their power. LETTUCE...conclude...for now...
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First
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Previous
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Songs Mentioned/Used: Gives You Hell by The All American Rejects
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Memory Transcript Subject: Khornel, Krakotl Talent Manager Date:[Standardized Human Time] February 2, 2137
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Aaaand DONE!
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I turned my head from side to side, inspecting my handiwork. While I still wasn’t QUITE as good at it as Ms. Teylim, touching up my feather dye was becoming easier and easier with practice. I’d even experimented a bit this time, and I was really liking how it turned out.
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If only this crappy mirror wasn’t so smudgy.
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Regardless of the state of the motel’s bathroom mirror, I was satisfied with the way I looked. My blue and newly touched up orange feathers were complimenting each other perfectly. And the slight hint of pink along the border definitely helped the whole spectrum of colors come together.
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Perfect.
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Once I was out of the bathroom, I sat down on the bed I was sharing and went through my bag to make sure I had everything.
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Pad? Check!
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Client contracts? Check!
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Pens? Check!
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Extra pair of glasses in case he forgets…again…
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Check!
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Credits for the fare? Eeeehhh, we can walk.
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Other than that though, I had everything.
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“Hey… Khorry?”
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My crest perked up at the voice. I turned around to see Scolina working at the small table in the kitchen area.
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“Yeah? What’s up?”
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“Sorry… I know you’re about to leave, but could you…help me with this?”
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I gave her a reassuring smile as I came over. Looking at the page she was working on, it seemed she’d gotten stuck on one of the problems for her math courses. Since she hadn’t received any education in the facility, she had a lot to catch up on, especially considering she was only a cycle younger than me.
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“Oh, I see the problem. You were right to divide both sides of the equation here, but the problem is when you tried, you accidentally wrote the fraction upside down. Since you’re dividing the zero by something else, it should be on top.”
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“So when I accidentally put it on the bottom-“
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“You created an irrational loop because-“
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“You can’t divide by zero.”
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Scolina cradled her head in her paws, continuing to stare down at her homework.
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“Thanks, Khorry. Sorry I’m so dumb.”
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“Hey! Don’t you ever say that about yourself! You’re not dumb, ‘Lina. You’re just behind, and that isn’t your fault.”
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“But…but I-“
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“Listen, if I had a credit for every time I made a dumb mistake in just these past few months alone, we wouldn’t need to live here. Making mistakes doesn’t make you dumb, it just means you’re learning.”
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She sniffled a bit before wiping away at her with her arm, the small pink sleeve that covered her scar soaking up any tears that were forming.
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“Thanks, Khorry.”
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I bent down and draped my wings around my sister, giving her a nice warm hug. After everything, while she DID have a very touching reunion with her father, the absence of her mother and the introduction of Trivah, Dailo, and Trilly was a bit too much change to deal with all at once.
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So we all decided that she’d stay with us for now until she’d adjusted a bit. It was odd at first, to be sure, but I liked having her here. Grandfather adored her and I had to admit, having a little sister, at least unofficially, was something I was definitely warming up to.
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“Always happy to help. Now, I’ll be working late tonight so be sure to get both yourself and grandfather to bed at a decent time, alright?”
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“Okay. Bye-bye, Khorry.”
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“Bye-bye, hatchling.”
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I ran my beak through her head fur, preening out a small tangle and freeing a spine that was loose. Once I’d disposed of it, I turned to head out the door, but not before stopping at the other bed, where Grandfather was sat, listening to the radio. His expression instantly brightened as he heard me coming.
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“Off to change the world again, Little ‘Nel?”
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“I’m gonna try.”
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“I know you will.”
​
I knelt down and gave him his hug as well. I missed this. After so long without him, every hug was a nostalgic treasure.
​
“And I’m not little anymore!”
​
“Perhaps not, but you’ll always be MY Little ‘Nel.”
​
“I know, Grandfather. I’ll be sure to make you proud out there.”
​
“You already do, my child. Now go. And be sure to tell that future Grandson-in-law of mine to run a comb through his head fur from time to time. I can’t even see and I can tell how scruffy he looks.”
​
I pulled away as felt my face turn warm, adding a splash of purple to the spectrum of color on my face.
​
“It’s not like that! WE’RE not like that! …Not yet, anyways…”
​
“Well, then tell him to hurry it up already! I want great grandpups before I die!”
​
CAW! CRAW!
​
“GRRRRGH!! NOPE! Not having this conversation! Goodbye! Love you!”
​
“Love you too! Best of luck today!”
​
“Bye-bye, Khorry!”
​
I barely heard the taunts of my family behind me as I stomped out the door and slammed it. After taking a moment to settle my feathers back down, I walked down the hall to the next door over.
​
Knock knock knock!
​
“It’s open!”
​
My mood instantly brightened from the kind, muffled, voice inside the room. I opened the door and was immediately greeted by the sight of Ms. Teylim making a meal, along with her adorable hatchling excitedly bouncing in his high chair.
​
“Khornel, dear!”
​
“NEWWY!!!”
​
I walked over at a brisk pace before kneeling down to give them both hugs.
​
“Where’s Michael?”
​
“He should be-“
​
SLAM!!!
​
“Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! Lost track of time!”
​
I couldn’t help but roll my eyes as my scatterbrained best friend and business partner sprinted into the kitchen area and quickly grabbed a slice of strayu from the table.
​
“You ALWAYS lose track of time!”
​
As much as I wanted to scold him for not being ready by the time I got here AGAIN, we didn’t have the time.
​
“Let’s just get moving before we’re late.”
​
“Right! Let’s go!”
​
However, just as we were about to leave…
​
“Ahem. Forgetting something, my joey?”
​
Michael looked up for a moment and frantically began checking his pockets before looking back at Ms. Teylim. Her smug look said it all. After a quick facepalm, he immediately jogged back to the kitchen area and knelt down to give her a goodbye hug, as well as a peck on the cheek for good measure. Lucky…
​
“Muah! Bye, Ma! Love you!”
​
“Be careful!”
​
“We will!”
​
Once he broke free from the hug, he made one last side trip to Tohba’s high chair, already going to plant a kiss on the top of his head. Again, lucky…
​
“MIKEY!”
​
“Mmmmmmm-“
​
“HEEHYEHAHAHA! TICKWES!!”
​
“-mmmMUAH! Bye-bye, Bud! ¡Te amo!”
​
“BYE-BYE, MIKEY!!”
​
With his goodbye hugs and kisses out of the way he made his way over to me…
​
My turn?!
​
…Only to run right past me and out the door.
​
Awwwe… Phooey…
​
Dejected as I was, I chased after him and down the hall.
​
“What?! I don’t get a kiss, too?!”
​
“Buy me dinner first, Bird Brain!”
​
“UGH!! You’re the WORST!!”
​
Memory Transcript Subject: Dohkar, Venlil Militia Leader Date:[Standardized Human Time] February 2, 2137
​
“COMMANDER ON DECK!”
​
STOMP!
​
My four brothers stood in a line in front of the bar, still as statues as I came down the stairs. I still wasn’t sure how to feel about most of them. While I left, they all stayed, and continued fighting for The Guild even when they knew what they were doing was wrong.
​
Still, I knew these men. They all trained with me, ate with me, stood by me…grew up with me, and now, they stood here, ready to fight with me. While I could never forgive them for standing by while the people I loved suffered, I am willing to let them prove they’re willing to change.
​
“At ease.”
​
I marched in front of them, inspecting each to make sure their garb and gear was in order. In some ways, it resembled their old Guild uniforms minus any actual environmental protection. However, instead of chrome, we wore the same white coloration of the APCs that had broken through the Guild Offices walls. Black boots, gloves and bandoliers offset the white of our suits. And finally, five stripes of bright, blazing, blue accented our new badges, reminiscent of not only the blue helmets of the UN troops that fought by our sides, but also the eyes of a particular human musician, one I was looking forward to hearing sing again.
​
“Alright men, in order for this rally to go smoothly, we need to be on our guard. My most recent talks with Tevis didn’t go quite as well as I’d hoped, but I did manage to get him to leave us be for the most part. While we WILL still have to deal with the Interim Guard being there, they won’t be coming nearly as armed or numerous as usual. They’re simply there to observe, nothing more. Keep your eyes on them, but don’t do anything rash, or let any of the civilians do so either.”
​
I turned and marched down the line once more. While I was itching to move onto individual orders, there was the Mazik in the room to address.
​
“Now, I know many of us are shaken by news of the archives on Talsk. Believe me, I am too, but that’s all the more reason for us to stay vigilant. The people are afraid, confused, and questioning everything. The Magistrate, on top of their normal nonsense, will be that much more desperate to keep control. It is our job to be the barrier between the people we serve, and those willing to use this crisis to exploit them. There will come a time to rest and collect our thoughts, but now is not that time. The people need us. This town needs us, and until that is no longer the case, we MUST remain strong.”
​
“SIR!”
​
Once I was at the end of the line again, I turned back around and began giving out individual orders, starting with-
​
“Bennic, out of everyone else in the squad, you’re currently the one with the best rapport with the people. I’m having you in charge of evacuation in case something goes wrong. Keep your eyes peeled for escape routes and be ready to begin herding everyone together at a moment’s notice.”
​
“Yes, sir.”
​
Next in line was Abra, our weapon specialist. Out of everyone, he was our best shot, even better than me. But he ALSO had one of the itchiest flamer fingers among us as well.”
​
“Abra, have you already made sure everyone’s gear is working properly?”
​
“Yes, sir. Every sidearm, baton, and smoke bomb we have is cleaned, checked, and functional.”
​
“Good, then I just want you to stay vigilant. Find some higher ground and keep an extra close eye on the Interim. The moment one of them tries something funny, I want to know.”
​
“And if they try harming the civilians?”
​
I furrowed my brow at him. I knew what he was getting at.
​
“Aim for NON-lethal, and make sure you have proof that THEY were the aggressors first.”
​
He gave a dejected chuff before responding.
​
“Yes, sir…”
​
What am I going to do with you, little brother?
​
Next was Ento, probably the only other Yotul here in town other than Teylim and Tohba, were they still here.
​
“Ento, were you able to make your last diagnostics check on the sound equipment last paw.”
​
“Yep! Everything on our end was working perfectly last I checked. We’ll still have to wait until they try connecting to know for sure, though.”
​
“Do everything you can to make sure it works. Leave the Interim and civilians to us.”
​
“Yes, sir!”
​
Finally, there was our medic, Canuck. Besides Bennic, this Zurulian was probably the one I was closest with growing up, if only because I’d always get the brunt of Albiel’s punishments when I’d stand up for the others, and it was usually Canuck patching me up.
​
“Canuck, in the case of an emergency, I want you to return to Dr. Forrik’s clinic. Since he’s still caring for his wife, I need you there getting everything ready in case something happens.”
​
“You sure you lot will be alright without me there?”
​
“We’ll be fine. The clinic will need you more than we will.”
​
“Yes, sir.”
​
With one last turn, I inspected my squad one last time.
​
“One last question.”
​
“What is it, Ben?”
​
“What about our…junior recruit?”
​
I sighed and looked back towards the staircase leading upstairs, just in time to catch a pair of suspiciously Nevok-shaped ears dip back from around the corner. I made sure to speak loud enough for him to hear me.
​
“He is to stay here and hold the fort. And he should bear in mind, I don’t just let ANYONE watch over MY bar. This is a large responsibility I’m trusting him with, and I trust he won’t let me down.”
​
The ears reappeared and solemnly nodded before retreating back up the stairs. Once I was sure my point was made, I turned back to my squad.
​
“Alright, if that’s all, we’ve got protestors to escort! Let’s move out!”
​
“SIR!”
​
Memory Transcript Subject: Khornel, Krakotl Talent Manager Date:[Standardized Human Time] February 2, 2137
​
The Soulroot tram station was surprisingly bustling. I half-expected the place to be a ghost town like most places were after Cilani’s interview. But with the news breaking about the Farsul’s archives breaking, it seemed the people of Soulroot were out and about more than ever, either flocking to the many churches and chapels in the area, or simply deciding to pray at the Soulroot itself for answers…any answers.
​
“Damn. I always forget just how big that thing is.”
​
Speak of the devil…
​
We both gazed out the window of the tram car as it passed through the massive central park area of the city. In its exact center, dwarfing even the buildings surrounding the large, wooded park, was the city’s namesake: Kihri, The Soulroot. One of five massive Seraphim Trees spread across Venlil Prime.
​
“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”
​
“Yeah. I can’t believe it was so close. I would’ve loved to have visited here.”
​
“Maybe we will when we have time.”
​
“I hope so.”
​
Once we passed the park, we turned back around and returned to our pads. He was working on another instrumental while I decided to pull up our current client list. I suddenly remembered something as soon as the list loaded and I saw the newest addition.
​
“Oh! By the way! I got us a new client!”
​
“Oh, sick! Who are they?”
​
“A restaurant in the next district over. It’s called The Lackadaisy. It IS an hour-long tram ride there, but it pays well, AND I got us a few perks as well.”
​
“OoooOOOoo! Like?”
​
“Like us getting to eat AND take out half off on the paws we play there. It might not be dinner, but I’d say half off lunch and take out once a week isn’t half bad.”
​
“You da bird, ‘Nel. When do we start?”
​
“You are scheduled to play during the lunch rush in two paws. We are to enter through the back entrance and meet with co-owners Sylvon and Kenta.”
​
“Sylvon and Kenta. Got it!”
​
Now approaching: Five Meadows
​
“This is our stop.”
​
We knew the tram wouldn’t take us all the way there. The Magistrate’s lockdown had seen to that, but that didn’t mean we couldn’t hang out by the border. In fact, the border that separated Soulroot and Five Meadows had become a popular gathering spot for people from both towns to “voice their displeasure”, which was exactly why we were here. With the lockdown of Five Meadows in effect, the war still ongoing, and the news of archives now made public, the people’s opinion of the local Magistrate was at an all time low. It was time to take advantage of that.
​
Once we exited the tram and saw crowds growing on both sides of the fence separating us from our home, we immediately spotted the makeshift soundstage we’d be using, as well as several figures on the other side garbed in white. They only got clearer once we got closer. Michael was even more excited to see them as I was.
​
“Heya Dohk!”
​
Dohkar, dressed in the new uniform of the Five Meadows Militia, greeted us with a warm smile, being sure to stay a decent distance away for the electric fence.
​
“Mike, Feathers, it’s good to see you two are alright.”
​
“Likewise, nice duds by the way. Totally doesn’t make you look like an oompa loompa or anything.”
​
“Watch it, Ape. I’ll have you know it was Trivah who made these.”
​
“Shit! Is she alright?”
​
“She’s fully recovered and here with her family. You’ll forgive me if I don’t call them over. The last thing I want is Trilly and Dailo trying to get through this fence.”
​
“No worries. Just tell them I said hi.”
​
A yotul garbed in the same uniform ran up to Dohkar and greeted us with a nod.
​
“Everything’s set up, you two. Once you're connected, let me know and we’ll do a sound check.”
​
“Right!”
​
Memory Transcript Subject: Michael Ruiz Andrews, Human Street Musician Date:[Standardized Human Time] February 2, 2137
​
Breathe…focus…
​
Sometimes…I wonder if it was all worth it…
​
Breathe…focus…
​
In a lot of ways, life was the same as it was back on Earth. Here I was, stuck in a shitty apartment, well…motel room now, I guess. I still had a shitty landlord that hated my guts. I was still struggling to make ends meet, playing music I wasn’t all that crazy about for people I wasn’t all that crazy about. I still didn’t have any real direction to take my life in, or any real plans for the future. So…was it worth it?
​
Breathe…focus…
​
I’d lost almost everything I had. I lost my guitar, the only real thing I had to remind me of Dad, and everything he taught me. I lost pretty much all of my possessions. Hell, the only reason I had new clothes to use at all was thanks to the human embassy here in Soulroot. I lost my home a second time, just days after finally bringing myself to start calling it that. I even almost lost my life. My scar still itches from time to time just thinking about it. So…was it really worth it? Remembering all the pain, suffering, heartache, and loss I’d been through in these past few months, sometimes I really question it.
​
Breathe…focus…
​
But then…then I remember the GOOD times. I remember all the people I’ve met, all the songs and memories we’ve made together.
​
Breathe…focus…
​
I remember meeting Mom, and my baby brother. I remember singing for them for the first time. I remember sitting and eating breakfast with them, talking and laughing the early hours away. I remember watching Tohba and teaching him how to sing, just like Dad taught me. I remember meeting Dohk, his honest words and advice keeping me grounded when the world around me just didn’t make sense. I remember meeting ‘Nel, slowly but surely building a friendship and trust that I wouldn’t give for anything.
​
Hopefully she puts up with me long enough for me to finally be ready.
​
I remember all the strife and challenges I’ve gone through, knowing that I wasn’t alone for any of it. I remember all the things I’ve gained: A life, a family, a mentor, a partner…
​
A home…
​
Breathe…focus…
​
A home worth fighting for.
​
Breathe…focus…
​
A home worth living for.
​
Breathe…focus…
​
A home…worth playing for…
​
So breathe…focus…and play…
​
The speakers come to life with a chill beat, soft snares and shakers keeping the pace as the ambience builds. A triangle marks my entrance as I take over, plucking at Teyrin’s strings. I nod along with the bouncing melody, letting myself get into it. I see a few in the crowd begin swaying along as I begin to let my soul sing.
​
I wake up every evenin’…with a big smile on my face! And it never feels out of place!
​
It’s hard to not grin as I speak, letting the notes express my current mood perfectly. I make sure to give those Interim jerks guarding the border a smug look which they definitely don’t appreciate.
​
And you’re still probably workin’…at a nine-to-five pace! I wonder how bad that tastes!
​
When you see my face, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell!
​
When you walk my way, hope it gives you hell, hope it gives yooou hell!
​
I turn to ‘Nel, standing up on stage singing next to me. There’s no one I’d rather be up here with.
​
Now, where’s your picket fence, Love? And where’s that shiny car? Did it ever get you far?
​
You never seemed so dense, Love! I’ve never seen you fall so hard! Do you know where you are?
​
When I’m up here…and I think about my old life on Earth…
​
And truth be told, I miss you… (Miss you…)
​
And truth be told, I’M LYIN’!!!
​
We turn to the closest Interim chump keeping us from our home.
​
WHEN YOU SEE MY FACE, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL! HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL!
​
WHEN YOU WALK MY WAY, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL! HOPE IT GIVES YOOOU HELL!
​
WHEN YOU FIND A MAN THAT’S WORTH A DAMN AND TREATS YOU WELL!
​
THEN HE’S THE FOOL, YOU’RE JUST AS WELL! HOPE IT GIVES YOOOU HELL!
​
I hope it gives you hell!
​
Memory Transcript Subject: Jerrick, Nevok Fugitive Date:[Standardized Human Time] February 2, 2137
​
The mood of the song calmed for a moment. I watched the live broadcast just hoping nothing would happen. Everything going on was just so CRAZY. With the raid, the Magistrate taking over, and now the archives, it just made everything I did in the name of The Guild even more pointless.
​
Tomorrow, you’ll be thinkin’ to yourself, “Yeah, where did it all go wrong?” But the list goes on and on!
​
Everything I did for HIM…pointless…
​
And truth be told, I miss you… (Miss you…)
​
And truth be told, I’M LYIN’!!!
​
I hope you rot, Father…
​
WHEN YOU SEE MY FACE, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL! HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL!
​
WHEN YOU WALK MY WAY, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL! HOPE IT GIVES YOOOU HELL!
​
WHEN YOU FIND A MAN THAT’S WORTH A DAMN AND TREATS YOU WELL!
​
THEN HE’S THE FOOL, YOU’RE JUST AS WELL! HOPE IT GIVES YOOOU HELL!
​
Memory Transcript Subject: Michael Ruiz Andrews, Human Street Musician Date:[Standardized Human Time] February 2, 2137
​
A figure stands in my periphery… I know who she is…
​
Now you’ll never see! What you’ve done to me!
​
She’s not my mother…
​
You can take back your memories, they’re no good to me!
​
“You’ll never be rid of me, Blue.” I know…
​
You can hiss all your lies! You can look me in the eyes!
​
With that sad, sad, look that you wear so well!
​
But that just means you get to watch as I live my life without you in it.
​
[Warning!: You Are About To Access Restricted Files: Continue?: Y/N…]
​
[The Following Is A News Broadcast Archived By Magistrate Intelligence…]
​
[The camera opens on a female, human, reporter with green eyes standing in front of an energetic crowd…]
​
“WHEN YOU SEE MY FACE, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL!!! HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL!!!”
​
“AS YOU CAN SEE BEHIND ME, THE “FREE FIVE MEADOWS” RALLY IS WELL UNDER WAY!”
​
“WHEN YOU WALK MY WAY, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL!!! HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL!!!”
​
“AND YOU CAN JUST FEEL THE ENERGY OF THE CROWD HERE!”
​
“WHEN YOU FIND A MAN THAT’S WORTH A DAMN AND TREATS YOU WELL!!!”
​
“ON THE FAR SIDE OF THE FENCE, IT APPEARS THAT THE RUMORED “FIVE MEADOWS MILITIA” ARE ACTUALLY HERE GUARDING THE PROTESTORS!”
​
“THEN HE’S THE FOOL!!! YOU’RE JUST AS WELL!!! HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL!!!”
​
“HOPEFULLY, WE’LL BE ABLE TO GET AN INTERVIEW! UNTIL THEN, JUST LISTEN TO THIS!!!”
​
Memory Transcript Subject: Michael Ruiz Andrews, Human Street Musician Date:[Standardized Human Time] February 2, 2137
​
Breathe…focus…and ROAR!!!
​
To my old life on Earth!
​
WHEN YOU SEE MY FACE, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL! HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL!
“GIVES YOU HELL!!!”
​
To the Federation killing my people!
​
WHEN YOU WALK MY WAY, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HELL! HOPE IT GIVES YOOOU HELL!
“GIVES YOU HELL!!!”
​
To the Magistrate holding my hometown hostage!
​
WHEN YOU HEAR THIS SONG AND SING ALONG, THOUGH YOU’LL NEVER TELL!
“YOU’LL NEVER TELL!!!”
​
To every last asshole who thinks I’m a monster for what I am!
​
THEN YOU’RE THE FOOL, I’M JUST AS WELL! HOPE IT GIVES YOOOU HELL!
“GIVES YOU HELL!!!”
​
To that monster who took my mom, rotting in whatever cell he’s being held in.
​
WHEN YOU HEAR THIS SONG, I HOPE THAT IT WILL GIVE YOU HELL!
“GIVE YOU HELL!!!”
​
And lastly, to that figure, that voice in my head telling me I don’t deserve a home…
​
YOU CAN SING ALONG! I HOPE THAT IT PUTS YOU THROUGH HELL…
​
The End

It only supports panniers, not trunk bags. You can't even replace it without losing the fender and the rear light. I'm currently looking into doing a mod like the one linked here but it is crazy to me that a $5k+ bike requires that in the first place.
Such a shame that an otherwise wonderful bike has this awful, awful rack.