Hello,
As the title says I'm looking into a program. I'm a former college football athlete who was used to the S&C style. After my playing days I started to do more bodybuilding style lifts and tried one Powerlifting program through MAPS fitness.
My background/profession is in fitness so I know how to program but when it comes to my own stuff, I want to follow something and modify that way.
I am looking to switch things up and want to add more explosiveness, different planes of movement, conditioning and of course overall strength to my programming. I'm no spring chicken either (39yrsold).
Is the S& C program good for what I described above?
Thank you

4 months ago, I said goodbye to LO, a former partner I became limerent for after our relationship (which I ended, I 'didn't feel' it). When the LE began (in the middle of burnout), I was extremely anxious, in constant pain and thought of her non-stop. Saw her a few times, which only made it worse, and eventually explained to her what was going on, and she understood that the healthy and loving thing to do was to say goodbye, for now.
The past 140 days have been brutal, and slowly I managed to get my life on the rails again. The ruminations come and go, and each morning I have about 2-3 seconds before the longing kicks in again. I expect it, and accept it, and remind myself it is not about her. (Found this video quite helpful)
I've been working very hard on myself (somatic therapy, EMDR, psychiatrist, psychedelics, ...) - and I'm beginning to see, and feel, the root cause of my limerent episode(s). Have been working through dissociation, panic attacks, fainting, extreme anxiety, and agonizing physical pain.
And somehow, last week, I found an island of stillness, of peace, inside myself - a place I can retreat to while my body and mind are bending themselves backward to reconnect to LO. I haven't done so, and I am aware that reconnecting with her might lead me into a new spiral of madness (with more info to process and to ruminate about), so I don't.
My current state:

• a sense of peace, now I can stay with myself and am learning to comfort myself.
• a sense of pride, for the bonkers winter and spring I've somehow worked through.
• a sense of shame, for how I behaved around her during my LE. I want to apologize to her and show her my 'new' self again, and start stripping the projection from the real person
• but also: still missing her so so badly. (even though I remind myself it's not about her)

Yet, it's a Catch 22.
I want the longing to stop, see her again and re-humanize her - and lately I find myself thinking I can see her again without it sending me into an anxiety spiral again.
Even though I feel centered and peaceful, I'm aware reaching out to her might trigger a new wave of obsessive ruminiation. So I carry on, one day at a time - taking the long view, choosing long term gain over short term risk.
Anyone recognise this phase? Pointers?
(PS: medication that is helping me:

• NAC (1200 mg daily) against rumination
• an SNRI (Remergon) + Abilify (aripiprazol) for mood regulation and 'slowing down' my obsessive thoughts.

Hi guys I'd like to start off by saying I'm leaving a lot of important details and parts out because I'm typing this on my phone and lowkey too lazy to explain everything in depth but obviously if you guys need a better explanation I'm always open to replying. Also this story might sound confusing so if there's any questions feel free to ask. Grammar also prob bad because I'm writing this at 4 am in the morning.
People in the story: I'm F, 18 Claire F, 19 Nina F, 18 Tiffany F, 19 Nina's boyfriend M, 18
Okay firstly, I'd like to start off with how we met.
(To be honest she is chronically on reddit too so she might or might not stumble across this post, but since meeting and getting to know her I've come to a shocking discovery that she doesnt really date people which makes me more attracted to her oddly enough)
For the sake of identity and anonymity I will be calling her Claire.
I met Claire through a friend who just happens to also be her bestfriend. We'll call her Nina. We're all first years in college and I met Nina through instagram lol. The lore of that goes deeper but to summarize it, over the summer before school started, a class page for incoming freshman was created so that people could connect, and find roomies. I saw that page as an opportunity to find potential friends that could match my interests. I stumbled across Nina's post and instantly knew I wanted to be her friend. Not in a weird, psycho, stalker way but I thought she was really pretty and her hobbies and interests were similar to mine. Summers passing and I have yet to reach out to her or messaged her, but we followed each other on instagram. That's when I saw Claire in her posts and stories, and Claire really caught me attention. She very beautifully, and her smile is very contagious. She has that natural beauty 'pretty' that just makes her so attractive. At first I didn't really think much of it because school hadn't started and I'm just tryna to enjoy my last summer before officially heading to college.
College rolls around and I finally move into my dorm, the first few weeks were light and I really enjoyed every orientation event. Weeks gone by and I still have never talked to Nina. I've made some friends along the way so I completely forgot about her. But during week 2 or 3 into the term I finally see her for the first time in real life, and next to her was Claire. At first I was too scared to approach them and say anything because they were walking in this big group of people heading into a resident hall. Me being oblivious and nosy, I go onto instagram and finally sent a message to Nina. The DMs were just like "omg I think I just saw you etc etc"
We finally get to talking on DMs but eventually the convo died after like 3 days. So I'm like damn, I don't know if this girl even wants to be friends with me. So I move on with my day. College is the time to go out and make connections too so I was heavily involved in clubs and events. I went to my very first club meeting around October, and standing in the center of the room I see Claire. Now at this point, Claire doesn't even know who I am or that I know Nina, but for some reason I felt like I know Claire. Again, I was too scared to approach her so I ended up leaving the meeting after it ended.
This all happened in fall term, so eventually I just forgot about both Claire and Nina. That was until winter term started, and I was enrolled in this one class. Coincidentally Nina was also in this class and that's how we officially met. (Final fucking ly) We ended up having the same hobbies, interested, etc. creepily we also share the same birthday and our best friends (Claire and my best friend we'll call her Tiffany) also share the same birthdays etc. Till this day we all think it's such weird coincidence but we jokingly call it an invisible string or whatever that theory is.
Back to the story, eventually we all become close around the end of winter term going into spring term (current term right now). Before, me and Claire would never hang out one on one, it always involved or included our other friend Nina and sometimes her boyfriend. And usually our hangouts consists of eating out, sports, studying, or video games. But lately, we've been doing more stuff together one on one and I seem to enjoy it a lot. We recently picked up a hobby of running. And we actually have a lot in common. My interests align more with Claire than with Nina and it's been obvious as the group is always on us for being so alike. Anywho, overtime i had developed a crush on Claire but it's not in a way where I'd date her it's more of an admiration way because I don't really date people and I kind of think relationships are gross lol which defeats the whole purpose of a crush or liking someone, but i genuinely like this girl but I can't seem to point a finger at why I'm feeling this way when I don't even like dating. To my surprise she is the same. From what Nina and her bf told me Claire isn't really about the dating life either. Anyways the story is probably getting confusing and you guys are like wtf, so idk this post might be a flop. Anyways, when me, Claire, Nina, and her boyfriend would hang out as a group Nina and her boyfriend would always tease us and say something about how I want to be like Claire or how Claire wants to be like me and they would bring up stuff like "you guys should just date each other since you guys want to be each other" and everytime I would deny and be like ew gross don't say that but deep down I high key liked the tease. At the same time I've never personally asked Claire or heard Claire come out hinting at her sexuality but Nina would say somethings and Claire would just sit there and laugh it off or agree. To be honest I'm scared to even ask Claire myself so I don't know. Anywho I've talk to my bsf tiffany about this and my bsf says Claire def give off gay, and me not wanting to assume I just brush it off and try not to assume or anything. So, now that me and Claire are starting to hang out on our own I feel like we've definitely got comfortable with each other. I would also like to add that we both hate physical touch but lately it just happens randomly where we would compare hand sizes and pay hand games like chopsticks or whatever it's called. I might be overthinking it and delusional but who knows. One night me and Claire go for a late night run and we stop to take a break in front of our schools memorial building. This building had a flight of stairs which lead to the front entrance so we walked up to find it locked so as we were walking down I missed a step and fell but not really, I lowkey hurted my ankle but that didn't stop us from finishing our run. When we finally made it back to our start point I went to sit on the field where I could lay down for a bit and just stretch my foot. Claire came beside me and we just listened to music together. She kept asking if I was okay and I reassured her but I could tell she was lowkey worried. Fast forward to the next day we go out to eat with Nina, her boyfriend, and in the car I was seated next to Claire and just the thought of her arm touching mine made me feel so at peace and comforting. After dinner we went back to my dorm and we all as a group took edibles and made slime high. At the end of our slime session I felt really tired but I wanted to stay awake to talk to them because we were having a convo about relationships and somehow the topic directed towards me was what is my type. I start yapping about how I don't really have a type blah blah and then Nina's boyfriend mention something about me liking white guys, and when that came out Claire's eyes widen and went "you like white guys like Tiffany too" (cause I once mentioned how my bsf tiffany is a Oxford study victim) and yeah so Claire got real questionable and started asking about me and my type and what my lore was. And about my relationships. And that's when I said I like people who are smarter than me (I did this on purpose because I know that Claire is extremely smart) so after I said that Nina's boyfriend was quick to his feet and said something along the lines of "wait Claire is literally smarter than you why don't you guys just date instead" and that's when I blurted out ew no that's weird. And all I saw Claire do was turn to me and stare directly at me. Almost like she was waiting for me to agree or say soemthing to reinforce that. Minutes go by and the convo kind of became awkward but we were still talking about relationships and what not. And everytime I swear when someone says something Claire would look at me first and wait for me to answer before she answers and that's just something that I noticed. Anyways I'm yapping just to yap right now I will end it here if you guys have questions or want a more in depth explanation just reply to this post. Surely I'm missing A LOT of details.
But yeah what do you guys think am I being delusional and weird, am I overthinking, or this girl might be interested in me
I forgot to mention, we recently started following each other on Spotify and one day after a lecture me and Claire both had she made me get this app called Airbuds where you can see what your friends are listening to etc. I didn't really know how to work the app but this one morning I woke up and opened the app I saw her recent listening activity and it was all songs from my playlist so i took a ss and sent it to her asking why she was listening to Taylor Swift LOLL cuz she doesn't listen to Taylor Swift and she said it's because she was stalking my playlists. And then the other night when we went running I told her to start a jam because she's always making me start one and as she opened up her Spotify I kid yall not I see my playlists in her recent listening activity and I was like shocked. Anywho she tried brushing it off saying it's because that's the playlist we normally listen to on our runs but that's not true because I don't play off those playlists when we run so it's kinda sus🫣. But yeah that's the end of the story I go sleep now.

As the title says I want to apply as a spring transfer and applications are due November 1, but the common app application hasn’t opened yet…
Is there anyone else who plans to be a spring transfer and knows what’s going on?

First Previous Patreon Royal Road is up to chapter 32!
Noah glanced at Mark and was surprised to see that he had an almost pleading look in his eyes.
“You’re fine with this?” He asked Mark dubiously. He still couldn’t believe that Mark of all people would approve of feeding the humanoid bodies of the orcs to the pigs.
“I don’t see anything wrong with it. They tried to kill us so I say let’s put their bodies to good use.” Mark looked at the orc corpses with a thoughtful look on his face. “Besides, there’s probably a reason why we can sell them in the shop in the first place. Feeding them to animals probably isn’t the only use for them.”
“Fair point. Hmmm,” Noah looked in Talal’s direction and asked, “What does eating invader corpses do to animals anyway?”
“Well you see, most invaders come from worlds where mana has been the norm for thousands if not, millions of years. This means that their bodies have evolved to contain and use mana in the most efficient way possible.” Talal pointed at the piglets and said “Most animals on worlds like ours, on the other hand, have evolved and changed to the point that they can barely use mana if not for the system giving them skills.”
“So you mean that eating the invaders’ bodies improves their control of mana in some way?” Noah tilted his head to the left and glanced at the orcs again “Then does that work on humans too?”
“No, not really” Talal chuckled “For one simple reason, humans already evolved to manipulate mana efficiently thousands of years ago. Remember that notification at the start of the apocalypse? It said that the planetary mana core was dormant.”
It finally clicked for Noah “Wait, so is that why creatures like you exist? Because magic used to exist on Earth?”
“Ding ding ding! You got it!” Talal smiled and suddenly morphed into his original form but shrunk down to the size of a sparrow. He then flew around then landed on Noah’s shoulder “We used to rule the Earth before the mana core was forced into hibernation by the invaders. That’s what they do before they invade you see, they take the mana away and wait for the natives to weaken. Weaken to the point that sending their weakest forces will be enough to conquer the target world.”
“Why didn’t you guys just leave?” Noah looked at the bird on his shoulder that was speaking into their minds.
“Oh, a lot of us did. The only ones left behind now are the weakest and youngest ones who were unable to travel through space. We had to use our mana sparingly since we couldn’t replenish it. That’s why most of us have human forms. So we could blend in with you and not have to keep on using mana just to exist.” Talal kept on preening himself while talking
It was at this point that Mark put down the piglets he had in both hands and interjected “But wait, how do humans fit into the whole ancient magic society thing?”
“Some of you were actually as strong as us, but for the most part, you were our servants.” Talal stopped to look at the two humans trying to gauge their reactions to that information but saw that they were more nonplussed than anything. “There are still some who want to go back to the old ways of us ruling and you humans serving us but they’re the minority. Most of us just want to be left alone while we grow in power now that mana is back.”
“I… I’m not quite sure how to react to that. Imagining a creature as strong as you wanting to make humans their slaves… it’s a scary thought.” Mark trembled as he thought about the new information
“Which is why we need to get stronger!” Noah said with renewed determination as he abruptly stood up. “Enough with the history lesson, it all boils down to us getting stronger anyway. Strong enough that we can kill those invaders before they kill us and strong enough that we won’t be made into slaves by anyone, no matter the species!”
Mark just smiled. “You’re right again! But first, let’s see what we’ve gained from those orcs.”
Noah brought out all the orc gear they’d gathered today. In total, there were twelve sets of armor and axes. There were also three sets of bows and arrows that came from the archers.
They decided to sell the twelve sets of armor and all the axes for a total of ninety-six mana stones. With the one hundred and twenty mana stones they got from the quest, it all came to a total of two hundred and sixteen mana stones. Add to that their rewards for earlier in the day, they had three hundred and ninety-eight mana stones to spend.
“We might be a bit rich,” Noah remarked while gawking at the number on his screen.
Talal scoffed and said “Relative to the people on Earth maybe, but you’re piss-poor everywhere else”
Noah visibly deflated at that but perked up again when he realized they could still buy a lot with the money they had now. “What do we buy with all this money though?”
Mark had a thoughtful look on his face “Maybe a better wand for you? You didn’t even get to use the one you bought last time because it’s too weak.”
“But they’re so expensive. I don’t think it’s worth it to buy tier-one wands. Maybe when we have enough to buy tier 2 wands or staffs I’ll consider it.”
Mark shrugged “If you say so. Now, let’s get to the juicy stuff, the level-ups.”
With that, Noah checked out his notifications. There were the kill notifications for the twenty-two orcs they’d killed today and the level-ups for his new spells. Then he swiped up to the ones that mattered most
You have leveled up! You have 9 status points to spend!
You have leveled up! You have 18 status points to spend!
You have leveled up! You have 27 status points to spend!
You have reached level 10 and unlocked more System Features!
Unlocked Titles!
Unlocked Leaderboards!
Noah excitedly checked out the Titles window as he remembered that he got a legendary title in the beginning of the apocalypse. He wondered if he somehow had more considering that he made his own spells.
[Divine Pioneer] -As a Pioneer you are given the opportunity to select a Subcalss early- Select now? [Yes/No]
Noah couldn’t believe his eyes. He hurriedly checked the shop for an information packet on subclasses and found out that you can only get one at level one hundred. Getting one at level ten would allow him to level it up much earlier than everybody else. He immediately selected yes and a couple of options appeared.
Scanning… Build focus detected to be full Intelligence… Generating Subclass options according to build and previous actions…
[Incinerator] -Focus on the Path of Fire and reduce your enemies to ashes- -Fire-related spells level up twice as fast- -Grants +10 levels to Fire Affinity- -Grants +9 status points per level- -Grants the spell [Incinerate]-
[Spring of life] -Focus on the Path of Water and bring life to everything around you- -Water-related spells level up twice as fast- -Grants +10 levels to Water Affinity- -Grants +9 status points per level- -Grants the spell [Water of life]-
[Engineer] -Focus on the construction aspect of Earth and build the grandest structures possible- -Earth-related spells level up twice as fast- -Grants +10 levels to Earth Affinity- -Grants +9 status points per level- -Grants the spell [Build]-
[Storm’s fury] -Focus on the destructive aspect of Wind and Blow away your enemies- -Wind-related spells level up twice as fast- -Grants +10 levels to Wind Affinity- -Grants +9 status points per level- -Grants the spell [Storm’s fury]
[Child of Mana] -Focus on the Path of Mana and gain a depthless pool to pull from- -all spells level up 1.5x faster- -Grants +4 levels to Mana Affinity and Magic Talents- -Grants +15 status points per level-
“The system really wants me to specialize huh. Hmmm… Nah. I’ll double down on being a generalist. The versatility is just too helpful to pass up on.”
Noah selected [Child of Mana] and like when he first got his class, his mind was flooded with information about it, though, to a much lesser degree. His head still ached but that took a backseat to his excitement of having more status points. After all, more status points meant more mana and more mana meant more damage. He then checked his status.
Name: Noah Blake
Class: Elementalist(EPIC)
Level: 12
Subclass: [Child of Mana]
Guild: N/A
Mana: 184
Stamina: 14
Strength: 8
Dexterity: 11
Constitution: 7
Intelligence: 92
Regeneration: 15
Unused Status Points: 42
Noah was flabbergasted at the amount of status points he could spend. “That’s eighty-four more points in mana if I choose to put it all into intelligence. Hmmm… No, I need regeneration too if I want to eradicate the orcs faster.” So, he put fifteen points into regeneration and put the rest into intelligence bringing his total mana pool to a respectable two hundred and thirty-eight points.
While Noah was distributing his stat points, he noticed out of the corner of his eye that the room they were in was unnaturally bright. He looked over to the source of the light and was surprised to find out that it was Mark, he was glowing a holy light. A few seconds later the light dimmed and winked out leaving a smiling Mark behind.
“What was up with that light?” Noah asked
“Oh, I got a title for going a different route than intended for my class and got to upgrade my class.” Mark’s smile grew wider while looking at his new class.
Nature’s Paladin(EPIC)
Because he didn’t end up picking a God to serve as a paladin, he ended up as a paladin of nature because of his connection with the piglets. It was kind of like a druid but focused more on combat. He kept his healing skills and finally gained skills geared for close-quarters combat that would make use of his increasing pool of stamina. He even gained skills related to animals and gaining their trust. He was happy most of all because he would be more capable as a frontline fighter. He’d been feeling lately that Noah had been leaving him behind.
“So, what class did you get? And what rarity? And how many status points per level” Noah grilled Mark for details but Mark kept a tight lip.
“You’ll find out tomorrow when we hunt some orcs. All I’m going to tell you is that I get ten points per level.”
“What?! That’s better than my class?!”
“Yeah, but it’s just by one point. And don’t tell me you didn’t get anything good from reaching level ten because I remember you telling me about that legendary title you got from getting that pseudo-planet.” Mark scoffed and said
“Oh, you know hehe.” Noah giggled like a gossiping schoolgirl and continued “I got a subclass and you can only normally get one at level one hundred!”
Mark looked at his cousin and couldn’t help but sigh “Why am I not surprised” he shook his head and sighed again. “Okay tell me about it tomorrow, it’s getting late and I want to sleep.” Mark got up and looked at his cousin again “Just when I thought I was catching up…”
Noah got up from his seat with Talal still on his shoulder and started walking out of the Boars’ room with Mark when he noticed that the bell icon in the corner of his vision was still ringing. He mentally pressed it and was stunned at what came out.
Level 10 reached! Unlocked Pseudo-Planet basic functions!
He stopped walking and couldn't help but exclaim "HOLY SHIT!"

Thesis

Sources:

• Tweet
  
• The ADL - Israel: A Guide For Activists
  

Elaboration

The ADL promotes 'replacement theory' in Israel, while condemning it in America.
Awhile back, the ADL put out a hasbara handbook - a guide to advocating for Israel.
In the handbook, on pages 59-60, the ADL espouses views that are word-for-word taken from 'replacement theory'.

• The ADL - Israel: A Guide For Activists

Excerpt:

A bi-national state, in principle and in practice, would mean the ideological end of the Jewish State of Israel and lead to the forsaking of Jewish nationalism and identity, along with its special status as a refuge for Jews fleeing persecution.
Furthermore, bi-nationalism is unworkable given current realities and historic animosities. With historically high birth rates among the Palestinians, and a possible influx of Palestinian refugees and their descendants now living around the world, Jews would quickly be a minority within a bi-national state, thus likely ending any semblance of equal representation and protections. In this situation, the Jewish population would be increasingly politically – and potentially physically – vulnerable.
It is unrealistic and unacceptable to expect the State of Israel to voluntarily subvert its own sovereign existence and nationalist identity and become a vulnerable minority within what was once its own territory.

• Alarmism about 'birth rates' = ✅
  
• Alarmism about immigration = ✅
  
• Alarmism about the demographic majority becoming a minority and losing its privileged status = ✅
  
• Equating the privilege of being a demographic majority with 'sovereign existence' (which in-turn negates the existence and/or concerns, agency, progress, etc. of the Out-group) = ✅
  

All of this is typical 'replacement theory' talking-points.
A commentator on Twitter points out that the ADL uses the same rhetoric as American and European ultra-nationalists, who fear-monger about PoC and immigrants.

The interplay between right-wing nationalism & support for Israel

The ADL's primary purpose now is to defend Israel's apartheid regime.
Note how Rep. Stefanik is pictured in the ADL tweet. She is the one leading the charge right now with these public antisemitism inquisitions of college administrators.
Right-wing nationalists support Israel because they want to emulate Israel's policies towards Palestinians (as a stand-in for immigrants, PoC, leftists, etc.).
A study on European antisemitism found that xenophobes (who rated higher in antisemitism) tend to support Israel due to its immigration policies. Whereas those critical of Israeli policy were less xenophobic & less antisemitic.

• This fits the American Right too.
  
• Former New Republic editor, Peter Beinart, wrote about this in an article titled 'The Beinart Notebook - Are Zionists more antisemitic than anti-Zionists?'
  

Since Zionism is a form of cult-like nationalism, it's no surprise that the ADL would adopt 'replacement theory' talking-points when discussing their concerns about the political agency of the Jewish demographic majority in Israel.
In order to maintain that demographic majority, Israel uses discriminatory legislation & enormous State violence.
A lot of Zionists obfuscate what Zionism means now (for all practical purposes) by signaling some support/empathy for Palestinians. So the primary question one must ask, is whether you support a Jewish demographic majority in Israel.
If the answer is 'yes' - then you're justifying massive discrimination & violence against the Palestinian out-group. It no longer matters what games one plays with the 'definition' of 'Zionist'.
Get straight to the functional point. Are you morally consistent?

The ADL, Mike Pompeo, and the Jewish National Fund

Peter Beinart, in a discussion with FMEP's Lara Friedman & political strategist Rania Batrice, talks about how the ADL supports discriminatory policies in Israel that it would never support in America.
Peter notes that Jonathan Greenblatt, CEO of the ADL, has to 'code-switch' when advocating for Israel, for this very reason. Whereas, someone like Mike Pompeo, who is also a cultish nationalist, is more forthcoming in what he wants for America (a Christian nationalist State).
For Pompeo, it's perfectly fine to support an analog to the Jewish National Fund (JNF) in America (ie a hypothetical Christian National Fund; an organization that would support land access/development for Christians only). Greenblatt would lose his mind if a CNF existed in America - but he won't propose abolishing the JNF in Israel.
In Israel, the government controls 93 percent of the land¹ - directly or indirectly through quasi-governmental bodies like the Development Authority (DA) or the JNF. But all of it is administered by a governmental body, the Israel Land Administration (ILA).
The JNF's mandate is to develop land folease land to Israeli Jews, so 13% of the land in Israel excludes Palestinian citizens of Israel & everyone else. Thus, when the ILA tenders a lease owned by the JNF, they are directly complicit in "outright discrimination".²

1. The Israel Land Administration
2. Human Rights Watch - Off the Map: Land and Housing Rights Violations in Israel’s Unrecognized Bedouin Villages
3. Human Rights Watch - Israel: Discriminatory Land Policies Hem in Palestinians

Israeli historian at Tel Aviv University, Prof. Gadi Algazi, explains how the Ben-Gurion utilized the 1949 Absentee Property Law to facilitate the JNF acquiring stolen Palestinian land.

• The Real News Network - Israeli Tree Campaign "Judaizes" Expropriated Land

Ben-Gurion circumvented any future international legal intervention by 'selling' (absolutely illegally) the land entrusted to the custodians (Ben-Gurion appointed Israel the custodians of the stolen Palestinian land following the 48' War) to the JNF so that Israel, in the case of an international debate, could say 'sorry, it's not in my hands anymore'. Within days, about a million dunams (1M dunams = about 250K acres) of land were sold for a price well below their value to the JNF. Another million would be sold later on.

Then-Israeli Prime Minister David Ben-Gurion appointed the Israeli government as custodian of the land and then sold 250,000 acres to the Jewish National Fund. The problem of the Arab refugees was forgotten in the main despite the United Nations trying to resolve it. Ben-Gurion thought that time would eventually solve the problem. The abandoned village land and houses were given to Israeli soldiers so Arabs couldn’t return.

• The Berkshire Eagle - Leonard Quart: A documentary about Israel's past digs at the roots of its present uncertainty

Some speculate the JNF never even paid for the land. Instead, the Israeli government agreed to subsidize the purchase in exchange for assurances the land would be set aside for Jewish settlement.

But the Israeli cabinet ordered the JNF to stop all efforts at buying land from Palestinians directly, and the men returned to Israel.144 Ben Gurion told Weitz and Danin in December 1948 that “The JNF would buy land only from the State. There was no need to buy land from Arabs.”145
[...]One month after Ben Gurion told Weitz that the JNF should buy land only from the state, the two sides finally concluded a major deal by which the JNF would purchase a huge amount of refugee land in January 1949. Despite his mistrust of sharing power with the JNF, Ben Gurion had long wanted to sell captured Palestinian land to the JNF. In fact as early as May 13, 1948, the day before he publicly read Israel’s declaration of independence, Ben Gurion offered to sell a massive 2 million dunums of land to the JNF for £P0.5/dunum. He was trying to sell land he did not yet control to raise money for arms.

• Fischbach, Michael. Records of Dispossession (Institute for Palestine Studies Series) (pp. 61-63). Columbia University Press. Kindle Edition.

The deal involving the so-called “second million” dunums was finalized on October 4, 1950, and involved the transfer of an additional 1,271,734 dunums by the Custodian of Absentee Property on behalf of the Development Authority to the JNF, 99.8 percent of which (1,271,480 dunums) was rural land. Granott later placed the amount at 1,278,200 dunums. The amount of £I66 million was to be paid to the government over a ten year period. Some sources indicate that the JNF was actually to turn the money over to the Jewish Agency on the government’s behalf; the amount then would be considered a loan by the government to the JA. Others claim that the JNF never actually paid the amounts it owed under the two deals.163

• Fischbach, Michael. Records of Dispossession (Institute for Palestine Studies Series) (pp. 65-66). Columbia University Press. Kindle Edition.

Thus, Israel confiscated Palestinian land and held it in trust - only to sell it to an organization that would only allow the land to be used (sold/leased/etc.) by Jewish people only.

The JNF faced no such obstacles and was free to discriminate against Arabs in favor of Jews. Its charter mandated that all land that it purchased thereafter would be inalienable, to be held by the JNF on behalf of the Jewish people in perpetuity. Because the JNF could not sell land it acquired, it leased land to Jewish settlements and individual Jews on the condition that it not be re-let to non-Jews and that only Jewish labor be used on the land—the policy of “Hebrew labor” [Heb.: ‘avoda ‘ivrit]. Thus as a nongovernmental organization free to manage its own land on an exclusivist basis within the new state, the JNF argued for its control of refugee land on this ideological base: if the JNF obtains the land, it will be the best way to guarantee that it is used for Jewish settlement only. This attitude was expressed by a JNF official at the 23rd congress of the World Zionist Organization held in 1951, the fiftieth anniversary of the JNF’s establishment, who stated that the JNF “will redeem the lands and will turn them over to the Jewish people—to the people and not the state, which in the current composition of population cannot be an adequate guarantor of Jewish ownership” [emphases in the original].

• Fischbach, Michael. Records of Dispossession (Institute for Palestine Studies Series) (pp. 59-60). Columbia University Press. Kindle Edition.

It's important to note that all throughout the history of the JNF, its officials openly talked about dispossessing the Palestinian people and taking their land.
In Records of Dispossession, Michael Fischback writes about the culpability of Zionist organizations in the expulsion of the Palestinian people - and singles out one important figure, Yosef Weitz of the JNF.

The question of to what degree Jewish authorities deliberately expelled Palestinians is a hotly contested one.13 For many historians of the Arab-Israeli conflict, the issue comes down to whether Zionist authorities ordered the deliberate expulsion of the Palestinians according to a master plan of ethnic cleansing. It is beyond dispute that some expulsions occurred as it is that, even before the fighting began, various figures in the Zionist movement were actively investigating the idea of what they euphemistically called “transferring” the Palestinians out of the country. One such person was Yosef Weitz of the Jewish National Fund [Heb.: Keren Kayemet le-Yisra’el]. Weitz was born in Russia in 1890 and immigrated to Ottoman Palestine in 1908. He began working for the Jewish National Fund (JNF) in 1918. The JNF was established by the World Zionist Organization [Heb.: ha-Histadrut ha-Tsiyonit; later, ha-Histadrut ha-Tsiyonit ha-‘Olamit] in December 1901 to acquire land in Ottoman Syria for the establishment of a Jewish state. It acquired its first land in Palestine in 1904. In 1907, the JNF was incorporated in London as the Jewish National Fund, Ltd., although its offices were located on the continent and moved several times over the decades. Starting in 1932, Weitz had risen to serve as the director of the JNF’s Land Development Division. He was also involved in the establishment of the Histadrut, the all-encompassing Zionist labor federation.

• Fischbach, Michael. Records of Dispossession (Institute for Palestine Studies Series) (pp. 4-5). Columbia University Press. Kindle Edition.

Weitz countered with a hard-line vision of transferring the Palestinians completely out of the country. He detailed his ideas in his diary:

It should be clear to us that there is no room in Palestine for these two peoples. No “development” will bring us to our goal of independent nationhood in this small country. Without the Arabs, the land will become wide and spacious for us; with the Arabs, the land will remain sparse and cramped . . . . The only solution is Palestine, at least Western Palestine [i.e., Palestine without Transjordan], without Arabs. There is no room here for compromises!14

Weitz and Lifshits agreed to try to work toward this goal. In fact, in 1948 they served together on a committee that investigated transfer (see below). When the fighting broke out in 1948, Weitz believed that it provided a golden opportunity to effect such a transfer. By the spring of that year, thousands of Palestinians were already in flight and leaving behind large stretches of land. For Weitz, the proper course of action was simple: prevent their return and take over their land. On May 20, 1948, Weitz noted in his diary that the refugee flight would create “a complete territorial revolution . . . . The State is destined to expropriate . . . their land.” 15 Once the fighting was underway, he would move to realize this.

• Fischbach, Michael. Records of Dispossession (Institute for Palestine Studies Series) (pp. 6-7). Columbia University Press. Kindle Edition.

The ADL's history of anti-Palestine activism: the spying case

Historically, the ADL surveilled Arab-American and Jewish-American activists who were sympathetic to the Palestinian struggle.

• The Los Angeles Times (1993) - New Details of Extensive ADL Spy Operation Emerge : Inquiry: Transcripts reveal nearly 40 years of espionage by a man who infiltrated political groups.
  
• The Associated Press (1993) - Arab-Americans Sue Anti-Defamation League Over Alleged Spying
  
• The Los Angeles Times (1999) - Anti-Defamation League Settles Spying Lawsuit
  
• The Jewish Telegraphic Agency (2002) - ADL Settles Privacy Lawsuit, but Denies It Did Anything Wrong
  

Excerpt, from a JTA (2002) article on the ADL spying on anti-Zionist Jewish-Americans:

Both sides had filed appeals in July when a San Francisco Superior Court judge dismissed the cases of plaintiffs Anne Poirier and Steven Zeltzer, but not that of Jefferey Blankfort, who claimed the ADL obtained his Social Security number "for nonjournalistic purposes." Because the settlement took place before the appeals came though, the ADL agreed to compensate all three.

Blankfort explains the court case:

• The National Press Club - Jeffrey Blankfort: The ADL: Covert action, censure, and courting law-enforcement.

In earlier decades, the ADL put out dossiers on pro-Palestine activism with titles like, 'Target U.S.A: The Arab Propaganda Offensive' (1975).

• Source: Stanford University, the Berman Jewish Policy Archive.

News article coverage from that time, reporting on then-director of the ADL Jerome Bakst's speaking engagement in town.

• Source: The Evening Herald of Pennsylvania, November 1975.

In the present, the ADL still keeps tabs on pro-Palestine activism & activists like Mohammed El-Kurd.
With so many more Zionist groups now, the ADL no longer has to be a one-stop-shop for all things Israel advocacy. They no longer need to spy on Americans when plenty of other organizations do. They no longer have to profile people, because other Zionist groups like Canary Mission do.
So while the ADL isn't outright spying people as it did years ago, it's not out of some moral shift. It's because they no longer have to.

My wife and I will be doing a 3 week road trip mostly through California starting mid august, and we are unbelievably excited! The dates and locations are mostly set in stone and we're aware there are some big driving days in there, so we have our fingers crossed not to have too many recommendations to change the plan :). We're hoping this gives us a reasonable overview of the main parts of the state for 2 newbies, starting and ending in SF.
We're interested to hear what some locals think of the itinerary, what things would be worthwhile doing in the time we have, and any favourite food spots or exciting things or events that would be interesting for a couple, or spots to see along the general routes we'd be taking. We love food. We love markets and we absolutely love american culture in general (pop-culture, westerns, ghost towns, ). We also fancy doing things a bit off the beaten track, but in saying that we are hitting most of the biggest tourist spots at the same time so not sure how feasible those off the wall sites/things might be if doing a lot of the main city attractions (ie universal studios, hollywood bvd etc)
Our basic outline is as follows:
Day 1 Arrive SF - pickup Car - Highway 1 Drive to Monterey
Day 2: Drive to Santa Barbara
Day 3: Drive to LA - ?ventura, malibu?
Day 4: LA
Day 5: LA
Day 6: LA
Day 7: Drive to San Diego (best route?)
Day 8: San diego
Day 9: San diego
Day 10: Palm Springs
Day 11: Twenty Nine Palms - explore Joshua tree
Day 12: Drive to Vegas (anything to stop and see from joshua tree to vegas?
Day 13: Vegas
Day 14: Vegas
Day 15: Vegas
Day 16: Drive through death valley, Arrive Mammoth Lakes
Day 17: Yosemite, via tioga pass
Day 18: Not booked ? San Fran or somewhere cool between yosemite and SF. Another night Yosemite?
Day 19: SF
Day 20: SF
Day 21: SF
Day 22: SF
(Apologies, that looks horribly formatted but wasn't sure the best way to do this)
We'd love to know what the must-do things are to see and do while in LA, and around it for that matter! Is the best way to get to San diego from LA to drive down the coast, or is there anything cool to see if coming further east, ie down through temecula etc as we'll miss that part on our way up to Joshua Tree?
Aside from that, does anyone have any really quirky or weird things outside of the usual tourist traps to do in any of these locations? We'd love to hear any and all recommendations! What are y'all thoughts??

Guys I haven't seen anyone talk about this, but I played all three dlcs yesterday and now I'm continuing my third playthrough of the main game (in final draft mode) and as Alan I am going towards the Oceanview for the first time, and where we find Alan's shotgun, there was a TV. I was able to hold X on it (like when we switch from game to live action with Alan) and I was sent to the second episode of Night Springs, North Star!
I'm saying it here because I haven't seen anyone talk about this x) So it seems like all three dlcs are playable from the main game, maybe only in the dark place as Alan?

Matilda Mary Michelle Blomgren was born September 25th 2006 in Stockholm Sweden.
Friday, May 3, 2013, Anette Blomgren and her husband Nils were going to pick up their granddaughter Matilda, 6 years old at the time, from preschool. Matilda's father Magnus Blomgren and her mother Elena Blomgren (earlier Elena Skobelina) were at the time in a custody dispute, and that is why Matilda's grandparents had been given the task of picking her up and dropping her off when she would spend time with her mother. Matilda saw her mother every other weekend.
This weekend something didn't feel right, says Matilda's grandmother Anette.

• I felt that something was going to happen. During the spring, Matilda had said a lot of strange things like "in May, then I won't be with you anymore. Then I'll just be with mother", says Anette Blomgren to Nyheter24.

Despite Anette's misgivings, they left and handed Matilda over to her mother Elena, who is originally from Estonia (but was born in Kherson, Ukraine). But since Anette sensed that something was not right, they decided to follow with the car.
The trip did not go out to Tyresö, where the mother lived, but to the ferry terminal for the boats to Estonia. When they parked outside, Anette went straight up and asked where they were going with Matilda. She then got the answer that they were only going on a cruise. Anette then tried to stop Matilda from leaving, but in vain.

• I saw that Matilda and her mother got on board while I was talking to Matilda's grandmother and grandfather. I kept thinking 'they're not coming back,' she says.

The weekend passed and when Sunday came and Matilda was to be returned, Anette's fears came true. Both Matilda and her mother had disappeared without a trace.

• It felt miserable. I didn't know what I was going to do, says Anette.

The family reported the disappearance to the police immediately on the Monday after the weekend. The mother, Elena Blomgren, has since been suspected of gross arbitrariness with children. ................................
Where are they now? Elena is at Interpols red notices, wanted persons list.

So I just finished every Night Springs Episode and I gotta say the Time Breaker Episode is the best one by a mile. Very interesting scenario and creativity at its finest.

No other gacha game will ever surpass Genshin's legacy. Hell, even HSR which is earning more than Genshin right now will simmer down once their strong storyline falters. Look at WoW, the game was so successful as an MMORPG that so many other companies started releasing their own MMORPG's, dubbing them "WoW killers". Has any game come close? I mean maybe FFXIV? But not really. As people say, only WoW can kill itself. And even with multiple allegations thrown at Blizzard and an extremely underwhelming expansion, all it took for them was one decent expansion to spring right back up. So if anything, the notion that only WoW can kill itself holds no credibility since even if there was a breach of trust, people still tend to stick with what's familiar to them.
In a similar vein, even if AP comes out and is an objectively better game in some people's eyes, most casual players won't give a crap and they'll continue playing Genshin. So, am I simply here to say that AP won't beat Genshin and the game is doomed to fail? Of course not, I'm simply telling people to adjust their expectations. As mentioned, FFXIV is currently the second most popular subscription based MMORPG, and possibly the second most popular MMORPG period. Instead of touting themselves as WoW killer, they managed to carve out a sizable playerbase for themselves who are more into the storytelling aspect, something that WoW lacks. AP can become like FFXIV, a game that manages to thrive in a rather sizable community by carving out a specific niche; waifus. Not to discredit other games but in my eyes, Wuwa simply tried to be Genshin but better and I'm not sure if that's sustainable in the long run. AP other hand differentiates itself from Genshin clearly by going waifu only and having a seemingly cozy farming system with cute kibos under your care. Only thing Manjuu needs to do is create a polished end product and voila, we have a successful gacha game in its own right. It may not surpass Genshin but it's not like Genshin requires 100s of millions of dollars in revenue per month in order to survive and the same would go for AP.
Now I probably have some few holes in my logic and a lot of stuffs I forgot to mention since this was more of a rambling of a drunk guy. But all I'm saying is that in order for a game to survive in a field where there is already a star player performing well above others, a game needs to carve out its own niche and I think AP is on the right track atm. Just look and Love and Deepspace, a husbando only game that's racking in $35 million per month, well above any other waifu only games present in the market. If the conception that male players spend more than female players still holds true, then so long as AP comes out as a decent game, we can expect more revenue than that.

On May 26th, 1977, a call was made from a payphone in Lebanon, Oregon. Though having just shy of 20,000 residents, the city still possessed a small town charm that made members of the community feel safe and at ease. Crime was far from the first thing on their minds.
That day, 15 year old Karen Lee was the one at the phone booth. She'd been talking to a friend about her plans, and the exciting recent developments in her life. She was running away, going far from her hometown of Hillsboro, destined for the crystalline beaches of California. She certainly wasn't alone-- her friend, Rodney Grissom, a year her junior, was coming along. They had planned to start new lives in the Golden State, leaving behind their troubles in Oregon. As many did in those days, they were banking on the kindness of random strangers to get them there. Karen, however, felt lucky in this regard, as she had found someone to drive the two of them down south.
"Our ride is here. I have to go."
With these words, Karen hung up the phone. She would never be seen or heard from again.
Even as late as early June, the famous Oregonian rain falls in abundance. That spring was no exception, and for the next few days, a suspicious sort of mist blanketed the thick forests. It choked the narrow logging roads and the two-laned highways snaking their way through the uneven topography. By the time the rain stopped, and the hot summer sun beat down on the drying earth, both Karen and Rodney were long gone. They had been declared missing, but to say that investigators had their work cut out for them would be an understatement. Even excluding the dense Oregon backwoods surrounding Lebanon, the teenagers could have been absolutely anywhere.
It would take until the arrival of fall for any progress whatsoever. On November 7th, 1977, a logger making his way through a remote patch of woods in Linn County came upon a strange discovery. He approached the object, which was obscured by thick overgrowth, and realized that it was a bundle of clothing, tied together with rope. With the clothing were also other items, including a shoe, pieces of tattered but still legible paper, and a blanket. Wisely, the logger reported his findings to the local authorities.
The items were found to belong to Karen, who at this point has been missing for months. Of course, the whole thing struck detectives as strange. Particularly a striking detail-- her denim jeans had been intentionally cut in several locations. A whole four years later, Rodney's clothing and personal effects would be found only a quarter of a mile away-- his jeans, blue jacket, wallet with identification, and a wristwatch that had stopped at 4:50 on the 27th (which month and what exact time are unclear, but logically some apparent connections can be made). A custom made backpack was never found.
That's where the investigation left off, and it has remained frozen since then. No remains or any indication of the ultimate fate of Rodney and Karen have been discovered, but it is assumed that they are deceased. But there are some promising theories as to what happened on the fateful spring day.
In 1976, a police report fell on deaf ears after complainant failed a polygraph test and was judged to be of ill repute. We now know how unreliable polygraphs are, and we also know how implicit biases can lead to police failures and victims being left to fend for themselves. Such was the case here. Marlene Gabrielson was an indigenous woman. She was found to be drunk when she was brutally sexually assaulted by a stranger, and this disgustingly was held against her. And she failed a polygraph while her rapist passed with flying colors. All these factors led to the authorities abandoning Marlene, treating her reprehensibly instead of supporting her as she deserved. The attack on Marlene was perpetrated by a serial offender-- a highway mechanic named John Arthur Ackroyd. During the assault, Ackroyd had used a hunting knife to slice Marlene Gabrielson's clothing in an eerily similar way to how Karen's clothing was later found.
It was also similar to how the clothing of a young jogger by the name of Kaye Turner was cut. Turner's skeletonized remains were found near the town of Sisters, Oregon. The man who discovered those remains was none other than John Arthur Ackroyd, who collected the reward money. Ackroyd's stepdaughter, Rachanda Pickle, would later go missing, as would two other teenage girls whose skeletons were later found on the Oregon coast. Apart from the methodical cutting of clothing, there was another thread that bound these victims to one another. That was, of course, Highway 20, the long, sinuous highway stretching from the Pacific Ocean to the Idaho border. An unidentified set of remains was discovered off the highway in 1976. Other women disappeared along this highway in the decades that Ackroyd spent haunting it like a specter, before his arrest for the murder of Kaye Turner in 1992.
John Arthur Ackroyd is dead, having died of natural causes in prison several years ago. He proclaimed his absolute innocence until the very end, refusing to disclose any information whatsoever. But for what it's worth, Rodney's mother believes that Ackroyd was her son's killer. As a methodical and organized predator who is highly suspected of committing a similar double murder in 1992, I have no doubt he was certainly capable of such an act. Furthermore, though Ackroyd in 2013 pled no contest to the murder and sexual abuse of his own stepdaughter, Rachanda Pickle, her remains have never been located. Ackroyd was very familiar with the dense forests surrounding Highway 20, which he had been traveling his entire life. It isn't difficult to see how Karen and Rodney's remains still haven't been recovered. But until that happens, there's no way to even begin tying Ackroyd to the crime. But my belief is that Ackroyd was a more prolific serial killer than we will ever know, responsible for many rapes and murders across Oregon from the 1970s until the 1990s.
Two innocent lives-- full of hope, full of promise, full of excitement for the future. Cut short by the actions of a stranger who took advantage of their situation. Though we'll likely never know what truly happened that day, we can only hope that with advancements in technology at some point true justice and closure will be delivered.
Additional Reading:
https://projects.oregonlive.com/ghostsofhighway20/marlene/
(Ghosts of Highway 20 is an excellent work by The Oregonian that goes more into Ackroyd's crimes)
https://charleyproject.org/case/rodney-lynn-grissom
https://namus.nij.ojp.gov/case/MP12090

There's a popular theory that Thomas Zane the filmmaker is infact scratch from American Nightmare so I'll start from this assumption. There's a good video on this but can't find the link anymore.
In Night Springs we see more about the Remedy multiverse. Basically confirming there are multiple "Jesses" and multiple "Tim Breakers". In the comic scene they also show Wake has his own variants. One of which appears to be Zane the filmmaker. Lets assume Alan, Tom the Poet and Zane the filmmaker are all variants of one another.
Lets try unify this info. Lets say in the events of American Nightmare the Filmmaker was possessed by the dark presence and became "Scratch" (like Alan was possessed and became scratch later). At the end of the game the dark presence must have been driven from him and he reverted to Zane the filmmaker and still trapped in the dark place.
Zane see's Tom the Poet had written himself out of "Prime" reality and tries to take his place. Make's Tom's life into a film and makes Nightless Night to try enter this new reality. People already forgot the Poet and now remember the filmmaker, leading some such as Jesse to confusion.
Zane and Wake/Scratch 2 team up to make Nightless Night and Return to try escape when Scratch betrays him and leaves him behind. They both want to take the same place in the "Prime" reality.
If Alan and the filmmaker and variants of each other, that would imply the Poet was too. That would be backed up by them having the same voices as Alan and Alice when we hear Zane and Barbara at the end of AW1.
That raises a question. Why is Alan in "Prime" reality if it already has a variant there called Tom the Poet? Did him writing himself out cause Wake to be created in his void? Is he from another reality again, or did Tom the Poet write himself in a loop back into Prime reality.
Perhaps the reason why Ahti see's Alan and Zane as the same is because he doesn't see a difference between different variants of the same person. Perhaps Ahti is unique without Variants.
Anyway, please let me know your thoughts.

I'll start off with my Thesis Statement, so you can tell exactly what the takeaway here is: I hate the way Character Attribute systems present characters, and I always have. The biggest issue I have is that they're full of Stats that are essentially "If you don't take this, you suck conceptually", but because of game design, players are forced into what ends up being incredibly limited archetypes. eg. It's forever optimal for a Fighter character to dump INT, so every fighter becomes a lunkhead.
If you don't agree with that Thesis Statement then you probably won't get a lot from this, but otherwise I'll explain:
Now, with that thesis statement, lemme clarify that I realise things are a little more flexibile when it comes to actual tabletop gaming because there you're not meant to create hyper-optimised characters and it'd often be fine to have a character with strange stat allocations. I'm talking primarily about videogame implementation where you're somewhere between heavily encourage to outright required to optimise your characters.
And I'm not saying I dislike the idea of Character Attributes, I don't want to see them gone, I love them. I'm exactly the kind'a guy who spends an hour on character creation deciding on my race, class, stat allocation, balancing the kind of gameplay needs I have for the character against how I envision them as a character in this world.
So, with that out of the way, very simply: I fucking haaaate the idea the way DnD and it's successor systems do Stats, and the archetypes that've been built from that.
The Fighter is always dumb, because fighters have to put all their stats in STR. The Mage is always super smart, because mages have to put all their stats in INT. None of them are any good at social situations, because CHA is a dump stat, but hey, the Thief has that under control, depending on how overpowered DEX is in the system we're talking about.
Why can't a fighter be smart? And why does learning magic mean you have to be smart? What about Wisdom, the Mage has to be smart but incredibly limited in application because that's the Priest's role?
It's archetypical as hell, and I think the worst part of it (and why I've used the example twice), is that the three stats INT, WIS, and CHA are all "If you don't take these, then your character just sucks conceptually. Even if they're perfect from a gameplay perspective." If you play a character that doesn't benefit from INT/WIS then you're dumb, if you don't benefit from CHA then you're a loser who can't talk to people. Strength may be just as valuable in game, but let's not pretend we as society don't view high Intelligence as far cooler conceptually than high Strength or Dex.
The outcome of this is you either completely disconnect the Stats from Roleplay (see Minsc in BG3 having 12 Str...) or you end up being insanely limited in how you create and present characters.
Go see Pathfinder where people talk about how Valerie only has 9 INT? Isn't that hilarious? She talks such a big game, but she's a complete meathead! Amiri, the actual meathead is smarter than her! But the reason Valerie only has 9 INT is because she's a Tower Defense fighter and Int does very little of nothing for her, her character is built to exist in the gameplay systems even if it completely contradicts the character's presentation.
Same deal with Fallout New Vegas discussions, "Obviously Ceasar is a moron that doesn't know what he's talking about, look, he's only got 5 INT!" Then I guess Ulysses with 10+ in all stats is a living God who's correct about everything?
And while we're on the topic, no, there's no fucking difference between INT and WIS. "Intelligence is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, but Wisdom is knowing not to put it on a fruit salad!" fucking hell, intelligent people know not to put tomatoes in their fruit salad. You're telling me a 300yr old Elf Wizard with 18 INT, 12WIS doesn't know where his tomatoes go? Every single example of "This is Intelligence, and this is Wisdom" is just something an intelligent person would learn, making Wisdom not even exist as a Stat, or at least not one that would be even slightly constant. Seriously, the discussions about INT v WIS are like watching people try pretend Neutral Good and Neutral Evil are actually alignments, it's all just hair-splitting semantics to invent a box to put people in. It doesn't correspond to reality at all, it doesn't even correspond to the presentation of the game's reality they're talking about.
And even if it did, even if I was wrong about that, that would only make things worse, because now not only do you have to play your Mage as a super smart guy (only Sorcerers get to be dummies), now you have to also be "autistic" and not understand people, or the world or anything around you. Again- I'm not talking about people playing suboptimised players on tabletop, I'm talking primarily about environments like videogames where you're practically shooting yourself in the foot if you don't hyper optimise your character. "Yes, you may feel better about your Fighter only having 16Str so you could have 14Int so he's not a moron that can't even tie his own shoes... But now you've made every single combat encounter harder and made your character useless." At that point, just play a Mage in every single game, that's what I often default to. At least then you're optimal without being stupid, and only having average strength is fine, that's no different than how most people are in reality.
Of course there's other examples, Cyberpunk and WoD use very different systems that capture character designs in different ways, and even the Fallout SPECIAL system is pretty good, since INT and CHA are roughly as good for everyone. Pillars made a good attempt at making all stats good for everyone, but kind'a made stats feel worthless at the same time.
But mostly, and especially in fantasy settings, we default back to the way DnD and the DnD derivatives have done things for a million years. If you're making an action RPG with a very simple stat system, you'll use STDEX/STAM/INT and maybe LUCK, and even if you're making a far deeper, much more intricate 300hour CRPG, you're probably using an extremely similar system.
How I'd do it? I'd do away with Stats that conceptually make your character "lame" if you don't have them. You can play a Smart fighter or a Dumb fighter, or a Dumb Wizard, or a Charismatic Barbarian, or anything else, but it wouldn't be tied directly to your statline.
Str for hitting, moving and carrying things. Agi for movement. Perception or Visualisation for Magic spells. Stamina to deal with endurance and resilience. Luck for fun. Probably something like Awareness for how vigilant they are. Maybe even Initiative or something similar for how hot-headed and ready to spring into action they are.
Anyway, there's better ways but it doesn't matter since nobody's going to do them and 10 years from now I'll still be reading about how "This character who's meant to be really strong in game only has 10 STR lololo, and look this guy talks like he's so smart, but his INT Stat is only 12!"

if you say no: kemuri!
I can wait for you at teaspoon
i'll get out there a little earlier, lemme spring the time on you since I suck at it.

Announcements

Hey, RomanceBooks! Here are some announcements before we get to all the details of what you read:

• In case you missed it, there's a mini reading challenge for Pride - come Read the Rainbow in June!
• June’s book club pick is The Very Secret Society of Irregular Witches by Sangu Mandanna Join us on the Discord to discuss!

Now…
Tell us what you read this week!
Please say as much or little as you like, but here are some ideas of helpful things to mention:

• Pairing (for example, f/f, m/f, or mmf)
• Rating, and your scale (4 stars out of 5)
• Steam level
• Subgenre (fantasy, historical, contemporary, etc)
• Overview/tropes
• Content warnings, if any
• What did you like/dislike?
  Was there a book you loved? Recommend it in the appropriate trope megathreads.
  

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Still deciding about what book to read next? Check out our Recommendation Resource in our wiki or our Spring Reading Challenge!

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It had been a few weeks since Altier was brought to the run-down shack that his black-scaled companion likely called home, and he could now comfortably say he was accustomed to the…household’s routine. The kobold typically left at the crack of dawn, returned a little after noon, and occasionally left again to forage until nightfall. When the weather was bad or there wasn’t a particular need for something, they half-heartedly chased their rabbit around for a bit, which usually ended with a bout of quiet petting while everyone got ready for the night. It was always amusing to see the energetic side of what he had come to know as a relatively lazy loaf of an animal. As for the routine of the ferrorabbit in question… Well…it was at least more interesting than expected.
Hoppit would begin his own series of activities as soon as his caretaker left—the first of which being a check of every nook and cranny in the shed. He sniffed at anything that caught his interest, varying from morning to morning, but he gave every object or corner its due attention. Once he was satisfied with that, he would eat some of the ragged plants that made up most of his diet, take a drink from his bowl, then jump onto the tro— table and plop himself down, his ears pivoting towards the door. It was hard to say if the lounging spot had been established before Altier’s arrival, but it was somewhat amusing to pretend that the little rabbit was standing guard over his core—if it wasn’t for one particular part of the morning ritual, that is.
Indeed, the ferrorabbit had a habit of licking the obsidian orb that sat in the middle of the room, which thankfully didn’t seem to perturb the system enough to give Altier a headache. He was confused when it first happened, but it was commonplace enough now that he barely acknowledged it. A part of him liked that he was getting attention as a core, even if it was delivered via a strange grooming method. The closest he got to being acknowledged as something other than ‘the dungeon’ was through an unfortunate misunderstanding that he could never properly rectify. He supposed that was hardly worth thinking about now, though; too much time had passed for there to be anyone left to correct. The little oddity of his mornings would have to suffice.
There wasn’t much to comment on as far as the rest of the day’s happenings. Hoppit would end his loafing by shaking his head and ears in a way that filled the silence with soft clacks, give the core a customary tongue bath, then jump off the table to nose his way out of the shed through a hole that was hidden by the storage cart against the wall. Where the rabbit went was anyone’s guess, but he always returned before anyone noticed he was gone, and often did so while covered in small cuts and scratches. Any blood from the lacerations was quickly licked off before it could be seen by the kobold, and in the event that the scaly caretaker happened to return earlier than expected, Hoppit would scurry over to the bundles of blankets to finish the cleanup in secret.
Today looked to be following the usual pattern. The kobold left bright and early with various gardening tools and a wooden pail, and Hoppit had since set off into the great unknown for one reason or another. Hopefully, he returned less injured than usual. It was frustrating to admit that Altier had begun to grow rather fond of the fluffy creature, and seeing the thing come back hurt was bothersome. Was it off looking for food? There wasn’t a whole lot given to it, so that was a possibility, and it could be getting into fights over whatever it found. That still didn’t explain why the animal was so thin, and Altier didn’t have enough to go off of to think of a potential solution. He wanted to help it in some way, like by summoning a creature to act as an escort, or maybe just by manifesting something edible like he once could. No, he could only stare at the ‘Synchronizing…’ that occupied his menu, wishing he had more information to work with.
He never thought he would miss the bombardment of notifications and their lingering presence that filled the edge of his mental vision; at least with that he could surmise enough to hazard some kind of action. Even knowing why the menu was acting the way it did would be a start. Yet, try as he might, there wasn’t a history for him to reference anymore, and he had nothing to work with. He was confident the last message had asked him to ‘accept’ something, then took his befuddled ponderance as an answer, but he was no closer to an explanation for what it wanted, nor why it prompted him in the first place. He just didn’t have another experience to compare against, since nothing like that had ever happened before. Not that he was ever in much of a position to allow it.
The entire purpose of having Altier inhabit a core was for him to become a dungeon of Decay, which entailed all the skeletons, poisons, acids, and whatever else came to mind when one pictured the concept. ‘Living’ creatures were something he only had the chance to experiment with near the beginning of his new existence, though he never dabbled past the first few insects before transitioning to the mindless undead. Having a thinking, feeling, breathing entity touch his core was a rite reserved only for the adventurers and soldiers that bested his trials, and that was usually a painful experience. Now, he had spent what he could only guess was hours being held by a kobold, followed by having a rabbit bump against him, and neither felt like what he came to expect. Instead, both had led to a completely novel reaction from the system. The strange circumstances put him at a bit of a loss as to what it all meant for him.
Sure, he could dismiss the deluge of errors from his companion’s involvement by pointing to the numerous ‘corrupted’ messages before it, and Hoppit was a part of mostly unexplored territory, but the lack of clarity nagged at the back of his mind constantly. Being exposed to activity after potential decades or centuries of unchanging solitude made him despise the informational dead end. If he couldn’t make sense of the rabbit’s circumstances, then he didn’t have much hope of deciphering the reason for why his system was misbehaving so terribly. He also didn't know much about the one who owned the decrepit holdings he was housed inside.
He still wasn’t sure what drove the kobold to take him from the cave. His suspicion of becoming traded goods fell flat after the first week or so, and he hadn’t noticed any cult-like behaviour, which was promising. Granted, a lack of nefarious behaviour didn’t mean there was a lack of nefarious intent, but he didn’t get the impression his companion held that either. The kobold itself didn’t seem quite settled on an opinion of his core, though it was up for debate if the hesitation was due to knowing what he was or not. They seemed to mull something over before bed each night, yet never reached a satisfactory conclusion, staring at the obsidian orb through weary grey eyes until they eventually forced themselves into sleep.
Whatever the underlying reasoning for his abduction was, he had observed enough to know that the kobold didn’t deserve to live in destitution. As beaten as the shed might be, they cared for it as best they could, and did so without a single groan or grimace of complaint. The floors were cleaned with a tattered rag and fresh water, dust was removed regularly, and any stray mess that Hoppit made was dealt with promptly. They even took the time to wipe off his core, which was possibly where the ferrorabbit got the idea to start licking him. The only time Altier had seen discontent from the kobold was when they didn’t find much during their foraging, and thus couldn’t give any treats to the excited and bouncy herbivore.
He wasn’t aware that a creature’s face could make such a painfully broken expression, and he was quick to decide that he never wanted to see it again.
Vexingly, his metaphorical hands were tied; a dungeon could only influence their Domain, and given the state of his system, not even that option was available to him. All he could do was glare at the rotting wooden beams that held up the roof and remember when such an issue didn’t exist. It would have taken a mere flicker of thought and a paltry sum of mana to mend the struts when he was a proper dungeon. He could even outright reinforce the structure by weaving in other materials, leaving the appearance as it was while making everything stronger than iron. Well, he once could. Working with other affinities was something that came to him after absorbing the coloured motes left behind by adventurers, and the accursed stone that stole his mana had taken that ability as well.
An attempt was made anyway, his will ordering the deteriorated wood to absorb any trace metals from the ground, but it was no use. He couldn’t feel the iron or stones beneath the shed like he would have been able to before, all but confirming his suspicion that his connection to the Earth element had slipped away. Nature was much the same; the only way he knew when Hoppit had returned most days was from the subtle noise and the essence of injury. The other attributes—Air, Flame, Luma, Shadow, and so on—were ones he never experimented with to any real extent, so it was less noticeable when he lost his grasp on them. Perhaps they faded early. Either way, all he had left was a waning cognizance of his own alignment, and that wasn’t of much use to him. If he had any appreciable mana income, then perhaps he could do something, but he wasn’t even sure what the upkeep of his current Domain might be. It was entirely possible that he was running on a deficit, which would offer a reason for why his system had been so—
[Do#$@n Ex@#d$%^&d! CRe@#r H-H-H-HoPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP—]
[Errrrrrr—]
[Sy$%^hroni%^$zing…]
[Creeee-tu— Hoppit ha@$ esttttb-hed terrrrrrr-ity f^#% t$e dun@&$n!]
- - - - -
“Well then,” he mumbled to himself, taking in the strange scene behind the shed. For one, he could actually view a small distance beyond the structure now, and two, there was a rather proud-looking Hoppit sitting on his haunches before a pair of significantly less prideful examples of the species. They looked quite a bit bigger than the lazy loaf Altier had come to know, yet they were more cut up and dejected than his furry friend. That answered where the injuries had been coming from, he supposed. Hoppit was probably running off to bash heads with whatever animal population existed here beforehand, and they had only just reached a consensus on who was in charge. Impressive.
One of Hoppit’s ears turned back towards the shed, his head following suit as he gave a lagomorph’s approximation of a ‘Look what I did!’ smile. Altier blanked out mentally, but didn’t have time to question anything before the new leader of the local rabbits imperiously pointed a paw towards the surrounding forest, which was equally surreal to witness. Most surprising of all, the…subordinates? The other ferrorabbits did as commanded, keeping their forms small as they took off into the foliage. Soft clacks came from Hoppit’s pleased shake of his head, then he too left the area with only a slightly lopsided bounce to his stride.
The man-turned-core could only gape at what he saw. Were animals always so…expressive? Had Hoppit heard him? What in the world was happening? Why had Hoppit’s personal conquest led to Altier’s Domain expanding?
He lamented not having fingers, nor temples to rub with them. His system was a garbled mess of errors and inconsistent messages, his residence was falling apart at the seams, his companion was someone who abducted him from the dungeon, yet never did anything past that, and his first real experience with an animal was turning out to be more confusing than he thought possible.
All of this was after an unknown amount of time spent commanding legions of undead to strengthen the very people who he would later learn had lied to and manipulated him, making him into a nightmarish entity just to bolster the power of their forces. He almost missed the days spent gazing out of a mossy window. At least then he knew what to expect.
Nothing made sense anymore.
= = = = =
The soft sound of roots ripping free from soil suddenly stopped, only to be followed by a dull thud of Ceele’s palm slapping against the ground to catch her fall before she landed on her rear. She righted herself with her tail and tossed the stubborn weed into a pile with the others. No matter how many mornings she did this, they always seemed to replace themselves faster than she could remove the pesky things. A sigh slipped from her muzzle as she set about grabbing the next one embedded in the vegetable garden.
Aches and spreading stiffness flared up, but went ignored as she neared the end of her duties, though she was well aware that they would come back with force once she tried to settle down for the day. The impending soreness was an inevitable byproduct of spending so much time working. Still, she knew that if it wasn’t for the kindly old couple that allowed her to call their shed home, she would still be sleeping beneath the stars while making sure nothing tried to get at her Hoppit. Even if it was just a part of the deal, they were owed this much in return, and she would see it done properly.
The sun bore down on her back as she did her usual tasks, which was a departure from the slightly overcast weather as of late. It looked somewhat promising when she checked in the wee hours of the morning, yet as her gardening duties dragged on, so too did the intensity of such a clear sky. A disappointed glance at the empty wooden bucket on the edge of the field was quickly corrected. She hadn’t thought to refill it at the river after watering the crops, and her parched throat was making its protests known, while also reminding her that there wasn’t much water left at home either. One more thing to take care of when she was done.
A gruff cough brought her attention towards the old kobold resting his back against a tree some distance away, safely shaded from the unforgiving rays beaming down. Her displeasure at having yet more to do was hastily wiped away. She was undecided on what to think of the detached audience, but looking so sour while upholding her side of the agreement wouldn’t reflect well on her. Hopefully, he hadn’t seen it. Not that she could tell if he did; he always had the same expression when he watched her work. The elder kobold’s arms were crossed, a finger tapping absently against his bicep, while his tail sat motionless on the grass, the muddy red colour of his scales standing out amongst the greens and browns. ‘Makis,’ was his name, assuming her memory served.
Makis had taken to observing her every so often, usually propping himself against this or that at a distance, the unwavering scowl being as unnerving as it was belying of his age. Somewhat loose skin sagged a bit around his jowls and neck, yet the rest of his face was still taut from how much time he spent examining red-hot metal, and his arms were marred with countless burns and cuts from his profession. He held an oppressive aura, though the crinkles around his eyes and muzzle suggested he smiled as frequently as he glowered, even if Ceele was yet to see the former. There was only the same judgmental expression aimed at her when he was around. She could only hope that he didn’t take offence to some unintended slight, but she didn’t know him well enough to say what might be considered one.
They hadn’t spoken since she took up residence on the outskirts of his land. His wife was the one to introduce them, but it was quickly established that he had no intention of being a chatty individual. He led Ceele to the shed hidden amongst the trees on the edge of the property, then dismissed her with only a grunt coming from the elderly kobold. She supposed that it was for the best. Her experience in socializing was centred around convincing others to employ her, and there hadn’t been much of an opportunity to expand her horizons while living a life on the road. If that had been the end of their interactions, she would have swiftly written the terseness off, but he appeared every few days, taking up residence beneath the shade as he watched her work, never speaking a single word. At least he didn’t openly protest her presence, yet she figured that would be easier to manage. He wouldn’t be such an enigma then.
There wasn’t a whole lot she knew about him besides his penchant for ‘supervision,’ and anything beyond that was what his wife had volunteered during the rare opportunity they had to chat. She was told that Makis worked the smithy out front, and although he had retired from doing so in an official capacity, she could still regularly hear his hammer as she tended to the garden, so she figured he kept himself busy most days. It made her wonder what was so interesting about a vagrant like herself, but when there was so little else to do, she could see how anything could be made worth the attention. It was just him and his wife living in the once bustling home, after all; the couple’s children had long since grown up and made families of their own.
She noticed his gaze shift elsewhere as she tugged yet another stubborn intruder from the soil, his arms falling from across his chest and the perpetually worn displeasure melting to that of curiosity. He wandered off shortly after, and she had to make an effort not to fall onto her tail as the pressure on her shoulders unexpectedly evaporated. Did something happen?
Ceele shook her head free of the distracting thought. It wasn’t her business if he grew bored with watching her work. As long as no one voiced any complaints, she could only assume that she was doing a satisfactory job. Maybe he finally decided that he didn’t need to be so watchful because she was doing well! That could be it, right?
A glance at the somewhat sloppily maintained garden erased the false confidence from her face, but she was just as quick to focus on finishing up, unwilling to allow darker musings to fester. Thankfully, there didn’t seem to be anything else that needed her intervention. The weeds were all uprooted, the soil was appropriately dampened, and her check for pesky insects or wildlife turned up nothing to worry about. She was free for the rest of the day!
…Or she would be free—as soon as she finished the last of her tasks, anyway.
The black-scaled kobold got up from her crouch unsteadily, shivering and wincing from the pins and needles in her legs. She would have to remember to stretch more often; it was far too easy to forgo that kind of thing just to make the overall work go slightly faster. Her hand reached out to grab the pile of weeds and put them into the bucket as she ran through what needed to be done before she could properly relax. Hoppit’s food needed to be washed, she needed to bathe, and they were running low on water anyway, so she would have to visit the river. Just the thought of dragging herself into the forest again made her muscles protest, but she wouldn’t have the energy to do it later. She forced the smile that had started to fall and took the first of many steps.
- - - - -
The river wasn’t too far away, only taking a few minutes of traipsing through the dense woodlands until she reached her destination. It was an idyllic little spot. The trees thinned out to allow a grassy bank along the water, and there was an appreciably gentle slope from shallows to depths, making for a convenient place to take care of various needs. She had discovered this place during her travels, and it was where a kind older woman found her.
Ceele was washing off at the time, with Hoppit safely taking shelter from the outside underneath the bundled blankets while he waited. The trickle of the stream brushing against rocks covered the sound of footsteps, so she was rather surprised when an aged voice called out to ask if she was okay. Her first reaction was to distance herself and apologize—the why didn’t matter, but she had learned that most people were more lenient of her presence if she seemed apologetic for it, and she usually was. The elderly kobold just laughed at her scrambling, tacking on an assurance that there was no need for modesty. The woman was blind, apparently, which explained how Ceele’s blackened colours hadn’t deterred her.
Strangely enough, there was a comforting sense of ease around the one who introduced herself as Hira. It was a sort of presence that Ceele could only vaguely remember, and it drew her close enough to speak as she finished bathing. The conversation wasn’t anything profound, of course—they hardly delved deeper than surface-level small talk—but Hira lost her smile as she listened to the younger kobold. By the end of it, the old woman posed a series of questions with a dark inflection to her voice, and Ceele struggled to find an answer.
‘Are you tired of looking for something that only slips away? Are you tired of running? Do you really want to be scared and alone?’
If the silence bothered Hira, then it didn’t show. She had simply held out a hand and offered Ceele a way of life that didn’t involve wondering where she would be spending the night, nor entailed cowering in the brush while fearsome predators roamed freely. It would be a simple existence of few fortunes, but it was safe, and it was honest. All she had to do was say yes.
Ceele denied it at first, partially because she knew most people despised Hobbit's species, and partially because she couldn’t shake the offer being too good to be true. Hira was quick to propose a compromise; Ceele could take residence in the gardening shed that had fallen from use, and to satiate the nagging sense of an unfair deal, she would be put in charge of maintaining the garden itself. All Hira wanted was to ‘see’ her favourite space bloom again, since she couldn’t take care of it anymore. The black-scaled kobold stared longingly at where Hoppit was, his little body shivering from the prolonged cold and fear that he would be hurt if he left the blankets hiding him. It was with a heavy guilt that she accepted Hira’s offer, keeping quiet about her true reason for doing so.
That was in the past, however, though she thought about it every time she stopped by and saw the smooth rocks where she and Hira first met. Eventually, she might gather the courage to admit that she was housing a ‘pest’ and beg for forgiveness. Until then, she would just work her hardest to prove it wasn’t a mistake to give her a home. That her endless efforts weren’t meaningless. That Hoppit deserved to be more than a ‘pest.’
That Ceele was more than something she had no control over being.
She cleared her head a bit and started on the reason she came all this way. Her dress was rather easy to wash in the meandering water, and the trees provided a suitable place for it to dry in the sunlight and light breeze. The weeds were fine with a thorough rinse near in the shallows, but taking care of her own hygiene required her to wade farther in, though it only came up to her chest in the middle of the rill. Still, she could scrub off the soil and grime, which was all she really needed. Perhaps some simple soaps would help rid her of the pervasive black that stained her skin and scales, but that was beyond her meagre means for the time being, as well as being mere wishful thinking.
She worked past the dreary mindset that settled in when she allowed it, focusing on how serene the river was. The soft birdsong from the trees helped make for a peaceful experience, and she could feel the somewhat chilled liquid basically pour into the aches and pains throughout her body, washing away the stiffness from spending so long under the unerring sun. It was nice to escape reality and let thoughts drift while held buoyant by calmer waters.
Yet the bliss was short-lived. Even if winter was gone, spring was still far from warming the waters enough for her to laze about for too long. She dragged herself from the soft current and fetched her dress from the low-lying branch she left it to dry on. It was still a touch damp, but it wasn’t anything a bit of time in front of the fireplace wouldn’t fix.
Ceele was only a short distance away from home when she heard a gravelly male voice, but it was the flicker of sight between the trees that made her drop what was in her arms and lunge into a sprint.
Makis stood just outside the gardening shed, a ferrorabbit held at arm’s length by rusty crimson hands placed on the scruff and haunch, the rabbit’s little ears flattened as fear filled its tiny face. Her eyes widened further when she noticed the small stains of blood in his light brown fur. They found out about him. Ephemeral claws of blackness clutched at her soul, ripping the very fabric she was made of as an unseen beast smiled, eager to take yet one more thing from her. Her Hoppit. Her baby. Her everything.
“Hoppit!” she shrieked, her words all but tearing out of her throat in desperation. Frozen blood coursed through her veins, yet poured into exhausted limbs. She broke through the treeline with no regard for the branches slashing against her flesh, panic making each sting fade before it could be processed. The grizzled glare of the older kobold snapped towards her, his usual scowl picking up an actual air of intensity that she never thought could be absent, the promise of violence lurking in his eyes. She skidded to a stop a few paces away, the lump in her throat threatening to clog her airway. “S-stop hurting him!”
“Didn’t,” he barked back, his tone even yet firm. “Cuts ain’t me. I’d’a done worse if’a had ta mind ta.”
The blatant declaration snapped her from blind panic, although his apparent anger didn’t do her fear any favours. “B-but… Then how…”
“‘Hoppit.’ Named it, did’cha?” he grunted, ignoring her confusion and bobbing the rabbit to get her attention again. His gaze shifted back to the animal, the flames of ire cooling slightly. “I was wonderin’ why yer plots ain’t dead yet. Suppose this critter’s why.”
One of her hands hesitantly reached out until she pulled it back, while the other clutched at her chest to stop her heart from hammering against her ribs. She couldn’t act rashly. Not while her baby was in his arms. “I—”
“Soft thing, ain’t it,” the elder kobold commented curiously, cutting her off.
“Y-yes?” she returned reluctantly, struggling to stop herself from lashing out to reclaim the ferrorabbit in his grasp.
“Like fine silk.” Makis tipped and tilted the animal, inspecting this and that with a deep-seated frown, all while Hoppit silently looked to her for help. The pit in her stomach grew. She needed to get him back, but how?
Ceele swallowed the dense dread as she tried to formulate some sort of plan, stumbling over her words and forced smile. “I-it’s nice! Isn’t it nice?”
His eyes snapped back to burrow into her own with hatred. “Wasn’t a compliment, girly.”
“B-but you—”
He released Hoppit’s lower half to jab a claw at the various spikes around his body, plying them with minimal force. “Look. See this? These’r suppose ta break bone. ‘Specially when he’s stiff like this. Ain’t no way I should be able ta bend ‘em. He’s barely more than a walkin’ carcass—all skin ‘n stick. He’s gonna get picked up by a wandering pecker if he keeps pissin’ about out ‘ere. It’s a wonder he’s still kickin’. What’cha feeding ‘em?” His gaze dropped from her face to the rest of her, disgust curling his muzzle into a snarl. “N’ver mind. I can guess.”
She felt the dampness build at the edges of her vision, unprepared to not only worry for Hoppit's immediate health, but also to face such harsh criticism while she was so vulnerable. “I… I try to make sure he has…”
Makis crouched to release the ferrorabbit onto the ground, Ceele dropping to her knees the moment he did. The terrified lagomorph wasted no time, bolting towards his adoptive mother and leaping into her arms, shaking uncontrollably. The rust-coloured ‘bold stared as she started soothingly stroking the animal’s back.
“Yer given’ em the weeds, aren’t ya?” he stated rather than asked. She gave a teary nod when her voice wouldn’t respond for her. The old kobold drew a breath, letting it go in an exasperated sigh as he stood back up, his expression becoming more impatient than antagonistic. “What else?”
“I— Um…”
“What. Else?”
“W-whatever I c-can find!” she sputtered out. Hoppit tried to hide against her neck, prompting her to tighten her hold. She couldn’t stop herself from shrinking, the guilt and confusion pulling her head down. “R-roots, vegetables, fruits… I give them as often as I can.”
His glare continued unimpeded, his cadence cold. “That it?”
There were a million things Ceele wanted to say. A part of her wanted to beg him not to kick them out of the first safe place she had in longer than she could remember, but she couldn’t find the words. She wanted to deny the judgmental tone that stabbed into her insecurity surrounding how good of a job she was doing with Hoppit, but the deadened void in her chest swallowed her pride whole. She knew he was right to critique her. That she was failing in the only thing that mattered anymore. That the feeling of loss would return.
“I try,” she whispered through the beginnings of a sob. “I try to find more, but he needs someone around, and I have to work the garden, so there’s only so much time I can spend looking. He won’t even eat all of what I bring back…” Tears dripped off her cheeks as she aimed a desolate smile at her furry friend. “He wants to make sure I have some too.”
“Yer killin’ em,” Makis pointed out plainly, crossing his arms. “He’ll be dead ‘fore the summer at this rate.”
“I know!” she shouted, forcing back the memories of insidious murmurs that lurked in the back of her mind, eager to creep into her ears again. The hate-filled stares that followed her, the rumours that arrived in towns before she had the chance to make an impression, and the guilt that loomed over her like an executioner's axe… “I know I am… I just… I don’t know what he needs. I don’t know how to make him happy…but I try. I’m trying…”
“…Yer an idiot, girly.”
She looked up to see the elder kobold walking away without another word. Her eyes fell to Hoppit, the ferrorabbit pressing himself against her as much as he could. He was small, thin, soft, and growing weaker by the day, but he never let it keep him down for long. No, he always showed his best for her, giving her joy that wasn’t provided anywhere else. She saw the thin cuts and dried blood, though she didn’t know where they came from, nor how he got out of the shed in the first place. But that was okay. Hoppit was okay, and she had Hoppit, so everything was okay, right?
…But how much longer would everything stay okay? How much longer until her efforts weren’t enough, and she was left desperately reaching for fading memories of what once was? How much longer until she killed her baby too?
How much longer until she was alone again?
Soft footsteps drew near, pulling her from the spiralling thoughts that threatened to gnaw at her soul. Damp, blurry eyes fell on Makis returning with a small wooden crate, the older kobold stopping a few steps away. He dropped the box, a deep, rattling thud produced as it impacted the ground, making Hoppit flinch in her arms. Ceele blinked as she kept him calm, then blinked again, looking up at the man for answers.
“The name, girly,” he spat in irritation. “Ferrorabbit. Ther’ Earth aligned creatures; they need metals. They don’t care where they get it, but they need lots of it. Iron, copper, tin, lead—raw crystal, if they can find it. You name it, they’ll take a chunk out of it. It's why they bother farmers so much; the best soil’s usually top’a gem deposits, ‘n the little bastards have no issue burrowing deep to get it. Dries up the element’s energy ‘n makes the crops weak.”
Ceele’s mouth opened and closed, each unsuccessful attempt to speak making her feel smaller and smaller. More and more lost. Why was he telling her this? How did he know? What was in the—
He kicked the crate with the side of his foot. “Scraps. Don’t’cha look at me like that. I’m a smith, girly. I might be old and retired, but I still work a forge. Now, this ain’t anything pure—it’s just slag and hunks—but I’m sure the critter won’t mind. Your little gardenin’ project pays off, ‘n I’ll see which of my contacts can get in some better ore.”
She ripped her eyes away from the box and met the perpetual scowl of the old kobold, seeing a warmth behind the hostility that she had never noticed before. “…Why?”
He scoffed in amusement, which looked somewhat menacing on such a hardened expression. “Yer a touch stupid, girly, but the missus adores ya, ‘n yer a good worker.” A shadow of a smile formed on his face. “Hira spent more evenings asking ‘bout how the plots are doin’ than I got time in the day. She’d bite my head off if I noticed a critter like that sufferin’ and didn’t lend a hand. ‘Specially when it’s obvious you ain’t tryin’ ta hurt the thing.”
“B-but the garden… Isn’t he a problem?”
Makis rolled his eyes, turning with a dismissive wave of his hand. “If he was, he’da killed it by now. I’d say he’s been keepin’ the others clear ‘n got scratched up for the trouble. That’s more reason to feed ‘em right in my eyes; pay the poor bastard his dues.” He paused after a few steps, shooting her one last incredulous glance. “‘N the rabbit’s right. You’re not much better off than he is. Eat. Before the missus takes my head, preferably. I ain’t need ta hear her worryin’ over you more than I already do.”
And with that, he walked off back to the house, leaving Ceele to sit stunned on the ground with Hoppit quietly nuzzling into her.
“Hoppit…?”
The ferrorabbit perked an ear and gently licked her collar. Fresh tears ran rivulets down her face, yet they didn’t weigh her down. They felt freeing. She adjusted her hold on the rabbit and held him out, taking in the small cuts and numerous other injuries she had never noticed before. He stared back at her with worried eyes.
“You’ve been busy, huh?” she cooed quietly, doing her best to keep her voice from cracking. He shrunk in her hands. “I told you to stay home, baby. What if something happened to you? I wouldn’t know where you went, and…”
Her protests died out as she saw what was unmistakably guilt on his little face. She brought him back to her chest and cleared her throat.
“It’s alright, Hoppit. If… If you want to help momma, then we can work together, okay? Just…please don’t go off getting hurt… I don’t know what I’d do without you…” The rabbit didn’t reply, and she was pretty sure she had never heard him make any sounds that weren’t his happy little ear clacks, but she chose to interpret the nuzzling as an agreement. “Such a smart boy…”
She took a breath and wiped off the excess moisture from her cheeks, setting Hoppit down on the ground. “Let’s bring Mr. Makis’ gift in, and then I need to go get more water so we can clean you up, okay?”
He bounced his way to the door of their home, waiting patiently for her to lug the surprisingly heavy crate into the shed. He was even still behaving himself by the time she returned from picking up the things she dropped in her haste. There wasn’t a single protest from the ferrorabbit as she washed over his wounds with warm water, nor when she asked him to wait as she cut up a small salad for him using an extra portion of her rationed vegetables. Finally, once everything else was gone, she tentatively sifted through the box until she found a chunk of something that didn’t look so sharp, then offered it to Hoppit skeptically.
As startling as it was to see him bite through metal without issue, she couldn’t help but tear up again at how pleased he looked with the bizarre addition to his diet. He munched through the first piece, then stared at the box while pawing at the air, asking for more. She obliged through wet laughs, feeling lighter than she had since he first gazed at her from his burrow, alone and afraid, just like she was.
Her little baby was happy, and that made it okay.
Next
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John's Revelation can be divided into several parts in which the periods of the past, present and future are described:
The past is described in the first chapter and there we have a description of the glorified Christ, the present is described from the second to the fifth and that is the period of the Church, and in this part there is one part that is also the future for us because it has not yet happened and it refers to the Church that is in heaven and the events described from the sixth chapter onwards are future.
For a better understanding of God's plan and program until the end of time, we will study Daniel's prophecy, which will facilitate our understanding of the events that were revealed to John.
"Seventy weeks have been determined for your people and your holy city to finish transgression and to disappear sin and to cleanse iniquity and to bring eternal justice, and to seal apparitions and prophecy, and to anoint the Holy of Holies. Therefore, know and understand: From the time the word goes out that Jerusalem will be rebuilt until the anointed duke will be seven weeks, and sixty-two weeks for the streets and walls to be built again, and that in a difficult time. And after those sixty-two weeks, the anointed will be executed and nothing will remain to him; the voivode's people will come and destroy the city and the sanctuary; and its end will be with a flood, and certain desolation will be until the end of the war. And he will establish a covenant with many for a week, and in the middle of the week he will abolish the sacrifice and the offering; and with hateful wings, which make desolation, until the appointed end, it will be poured out on the desolation"
Daniel 9:24-27
Danilo was a prophet, a Jew, and he was a slave in Babylon with the rest of the people, but in addition to the torments he had in slavery, he was also interested in the fate of his people Israel and the holy city of Jerusalem. That's how Danilo read Jeremiah's prophecy about his people.
"And all that land will be desolation and wonder, and those nations will serve the king of Babylon for seventy years.
And when seventy years are completed, then I will visit the king of Babylon and that nation, says the Lord, for their iniquities, and the land of the Chaldeans, and I will turn it into an eternal desolation."
Jeremiah 25:11-12
and he saw that God had appointed Judah to be in captivity for seventy years and then he counted the time spent in Babylonian captivity and concluded that the end of this time is near. It is written:
,,. In the first year of Darius, the son of Ahasuerus of the tribe of Midian, who reigned over the kingdom of the Chaldeans,
In the first year of his reign, I, Danilo, understood from the books the number of years, which the Lord had told Jeremiah the prophet that would end with the ruins of Jerusalem, seventy years.
Daniel 9:1-3
And God sends an angel to the prophet Daniel with an announcement
"And while I was still speaking and praying and confessing my sin and the sin of my people Israel, and I fell down praying before the Lord my God for the holy mountain of my God. they flew quickly and touched me about the evening sacrifice. And he taught me and spoke with me and said: Danilo, now I came out to reason with you. At the beginning of your prayer, the word came out, and I came to tell you, because you are kind; therefore listen to the word, and understand the apparition. Seventy weeks are appointed for your people and for your holy city..."
Daniel 9:20-24
At the end of this quote, we see that it says "ordained to your people", which means that what God says (in this case, determined) no one can change. So this refers to Daniel's people and the holy city, which are the people of Israel and the city Jerusalem and this is not designated either for the Gentiles or for the Church of Christ.
,,Seventy weeks are determined for your people and your holy city" and in the new translation it says,,,Seventy weeks are determined for your people and your holy city"
Since this is about the Jews, let's see how they divided time. The Jews divided time into seven intervals, so they had a week of days (week of days).
"Work for six days, and finish all your work. And the seventh day is a rest for the Lord your God; then do no work, neither you, nor your son, nor your daughter, nor your manservant, nor your maidservant, nor your livestock, nor the stranger who is within your gates."
Exod.20:9-10
The next thing they used was a week of years and they also called it Saturday years or a week (week).
"Six years sow your field, and six years cut your vineyard and gather the harvest. And let the seventh year be a sabbath for rest for the earth, the sabbath of the Lord; do not sow in your field or prune your vineyard."
Levit. 25:3-4
and in the end they had a week for seven years
"And count seven sevenths of years, seven times seven years, so that seven sevenths of your years will be forty-nine years"
Levit. 25:8
We saw how the Jews used time intervals, and now let's see what happened to Daniel
"Seventy weeks are determined for your people and your holy city..." God announces to Daniel that there are still seventy determined weeks to fulfill God's plan with Israel and Jerusalem and the promises that God made since Abraham.
This is certainly not about a week of days, because that would be four hundred and ninety days, but about seventy weeks of years, that is, about four hundred and ninety years.
The next thing Daniel needed to understand was the details that would be fulfilled in these seventy specific weeks and also what would be at the end when these seventy weeks were over.
We read in Daniel:
"Seventy weeks have been determined for your people and your holy city to finish transgression and to disappear sin and to cleanse iniquity and to bring eternal justice, and to seal apparitions and prophecy, and to anoint the Holy of Holies"
"Seventy weeks have been determined for your people and your holy city to end the transgression"
We have seen that the prophecy refers to Israel, and the greatest transgression that Israel has ever committed is the rejection of the Lord Jesus Christ as Savior. This transgression was committed by the Israelites when the "sixty-nine weeks" were over, and in the prophecy we read about it: "he will be executed" anointed "
The anointed one is Messiah in Jewish and Christ in Greek. From this transgression, the Jews who believe in Christ will be saved in the last week, which lasts seven years, and that is seven years of great tribulation. According to the prophecy, during the great tribulation, there will be a great awakening and then a hundred forty-four thousand Jewish missionaries to preach the word of God (revelation of the seventh chapter). In Romans we read about it:
"And thus will all Israel be saved, as it is written: A Deliverer will come from Zion and turn away wickedness from Jacob"
Rom. 11:26
and only at the end of the great tribulation will the rest be converted and only when Christ comes will the transgression of Israel be completed and
other details that Danilo should have understood, he writes, "and for the sin to disappear"
Only when Israel receives Christ through faith in Christ will their sins be cleansed, and we can read about that:
"And this is my promise to them when I take away their sins."
Rom. 11:27
and the third detail is "and to cleanse iniquity" and that will happen when Christ comes and we read about it in the Gospel according to Matthew:
"The Son of Man will send his angels, and will gather out of his kingdom all those who stumble and do lawlessness"
Matt. 13:41
And when these negative things are removed in the text, we also read positive changes and relationships that will be established.
"and to bring eternal justice," this is what the whole world longs for, but that will not happen until Christ comes. And when Christ comes, the problem of transgression, sin, infidelity, iniquity and scandal will be solved, and only then will it be established eternal justice in Christ's kingdom. In Luke's Gospel, it is written that God announced the following to Mary;
,,. He will be great, and will be called the Son of the Most High, and the Lord God will give Him the throne of His father David; And he will reign in the house of Jacob forever, and there will be no end to his kingdom."
Luke 1:32-33
"and to seal the apparition and the prophecy," we know from the Bible that many visions and prophecies are related to Israel and many of these prophecies have been fulfilled, but not all of them and will finally be fulfilled when Christ comes because it says,, and to be sealed " means it will be fully fulfilled and there will be no more need for prophets and prophecies.
And the last detail that Daniel should have understood in a positive context is: "to help the Holy of Holies". to the saints" (it is written about this in the book of the prophet Ezekiel from chapters 40 to 48) and when the seventy weeks are over and Christ comes to earth, there will be a consecration of this temple (anointing means consecration)
"Seventy weeks are determined for your people and your holy city" we could write this differently, "four hundred and ninety years are determined for your people and your holy city" and from when these four hundred and ninety years are counted, it says:
"Therefore know and understand: From the time the word goes out that Jerusalem will be rebuilt until the anointed duke will be seven weeks, and sixty-two weeks for the streets and walls to be built again, and that in a difficult time." but a better and clearer translation is in the edition Realities, Zagreb:
"Know and understand: From the time when the word "Let them return and let them rebuild Jerusalem" goes out until the Prince of the Anointed: seven weeks, and then sixty-two weeks, and the square and the moat will be built again, and that in a difficult time ." and the English translation reads
"from the issuing of the command to rebuild Jerusalem until the Anointed Duke, there will be seven weeks and sixty-two weeks: the streets will be built again, and the walls, and that in a difficult time."
according to this, this simplicity is divided into three parts: seven weeks, sixty-two weeks and one week, so a total of seventy.
The counting begins,, Since the word came out that Jerusalem is being built again "There are disagreements and various interpretations regarding the beginning of the counting, but what the Bible indicates is that the "decree on the building of Jerusalem" is counted from when Artaxerxes issued the command and permission to Nehemiah to builds the walls of Jerusalem. We read about it in the book of Nehemiah.
"And in the month of Nisan, in the twentieth year of Artaxerxes the king, there was wine before him, and I took the wine and gave it to the king. And before I was not cheerful in front of him. And the king said to me: Why are you looking cheerful when you are not sick? It is nothing but sadness in the heart. And I was very scared. And I said to the king: May the king live forever! How could I not have a cheerful face, when the city where the graves of my fathers are laid waste and its gates burned with fire? And the king said to me: What do you want? Then I prayed to God in heaven, and I said to the king: If it pleases the king and if your servant is dear to you, send me to Judea to the city where the graves of my fathers are, so that I can build it. And the king said to me, and his wife was sitting next to him: How long will you need for the journey, and when will you return? And it pleased the king, and he let me go when I told him the time. Then I said to the king: If it pleases the king, let me be given a book on the princes across the river to accompany me until I come to Judea,
And a book on Asaph, the keeper of the king's forest, to give me wood for the logs for the door of the court next to the house of God and for the city wall and for the house I will enter. And the king gave me, because the good hand of my God was upon me.
And so I came with the princes across the river, and gave them the books of the emperor. And the king sent princes and horsemen with me. And when Sanavalat the Oronian and Tobias the servant of Ammonite heard this, they hated it very much that a man had come to take care of the children of Israel. Then I came to Jerusalem, and I stayed there for three days. So I got up at night. with a few people, and I told no one what my God had put in my heart to do in Jerusalem; and I have no horse with me except the one on which I am riding. And I went out at night to the gate of the valley, to the dragon's spring, and to the festering gate, and I looked at the walls of Jerusalem, how they were broken down and how the gates were burned with fire. From there I passed to the spring gate and to the imperial lake, and there was no place for yarn to slip under me. So I rode along the stream at night and looked around the wall, then I returned to the gate of the valley, and so I came back."
Nehemiah 2:1-15
and in the sixth chapter we read:
"And so the wall was completed on the twenty-fifth day of the month of Elul in fifty-two days."
Nehemiah 6:15
and in the sixth chapter we read:
"And so the wall was completed on the twenty-fifth day of the month of Elul in fifty-two days."
Nehemiah 6:15
Artaxerxes gave this permission, which means that "Danilo's weeks" are counted from then.
The first part of this prophecy is "seven weeks" or forty-nine gidins, and during this time the Jews completed the construction of the Jerusalem wall, and the second part is "sixty-two weeks" and that is four hundred and thirty-four years, a total of four hundred and eighty-three year and after this, something should happen. This period in Jewish history is also called the "difficult time" because God did not appear from Malachi until John the Baptist, and in the time of John the Baptist, the Jews were under the occupation of the Romans,
"And after those sixty-two weeks, the Anointed One will be executed," so God foretold to Daniel the crucifixion of Christ on the cross in this way.
John the Baptist, the apostles and Christ spoke
"And they said: Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near"
Matt. 3:2
"From that time Jesus began to teach and say: Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand."
Matt. 4:17
"And Peter said to them: Repent, and be baptized each of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of sins; and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit;"
Acts 2:38
"Repent, therefore, and turn to be cleansed of your sins, so that the times of rest from the face of the Lord may come."
Acts 3:19
If the Jews had listened to what they were saying, another week would have passed and seven years would have passed and eternal justice would have come as it was prophesied.
"Whom, then, is heaven worthy to receive until the time when everything is restored, which God has spoken through the mouth of all his holy prophets since the creation of the world."
Acts 3:21

I've never had much luck with crushes, and it usually has to do with my appearance (I'm chubby, and I wouldn't call myself pretty) and my being very awkward around people. which is why I wonder if this guy likes me. We became friends around December of last year, and we never had any interactions that stood out to me as out of the ordinary for us. (Things would get quiet, and he would walk away), but at some point, I couldn't identify when he was acting differently. He walked with me to my next class and tried hugging me goodbye, but I didn't realize it and stuck my hand out for a handshake.( I know it was very embarrassing, but that's not the point.) He would try to hug me more after this, and he would rest his arm on my shoulder, but he didn't really treat it as a big deal, so neither did I. Well, we were with some mutual friends before class started, and one of the girls stared talking about the guy she likes, and he made a joke about his ideal height for a partner, and he said super short because he likes young girls (shitty joke, but I digress), but then he said he was joking, and then he said his ideal girlfriend's height would be around my height, and he put his hand out next to my head as to say that height. I didn't think much of this because I assumed he was joking again. Then the conversation turned, and the two girls started talking separately from us, and then he started telling me about how he was going to the gym more now and to feel his arms, and he asked me to punch his thighs to feel how hard they were. I thought this was strange, but I wanted to let him brag because I was glad he was proud of himself. But when I told this to my friends, one started telling me that he likes me, and the other just thought he was being more friendly and, if anything, to see if he does that stuff with anyone else and not jump to conclusions. I told her she was probably right and didn't think of it till the next time I saw him. I didn't notice him being like this with anyone. Before class, we would talk with our friends, and he would put his hand on my shoulder or lean on me like it was normal, but then I noticed that he would pull out a chair to sit next to me or he would move so he could talk to me, but I just assumed it was because I was always early and he had no one else to talk to. Sometimes we wouldn't talk or anything; we would just look at random crap on his phone or mine while waiting for others to get there or for class to start. At our spring concert, he played the fnaf music for me because I couldn't (I suck at the violin, and I had a sprained shoulder, so I physically couldn't play). I thought it was cute because it was just us and a mutual friend, but she wasn't really paying attention to us. At the end of the night, I walked back to help pack up with him and some friends, and I usually stay to hear him and one of our friends fight over who's better, but I hurt myself with my shoes, so I left way earlier, and he actually seemed bummed out to see me go, so at this point, I sort of think he might like me, but then when we were talking a couple of weeks ago, we were just scrolling on Twitter after class and stumbled upon one of those threads that were just an excuse for people to get their nudes out there, and that turned into a conversation about how girls are sending nudes younger and younger these days, and then he pulled out his Snapchat and asked me if I was ok with seeing something. I said ok, and he was hesitant, but he showed me some random girl's nudes and started saying that he beat her in Fortnite and how that was the deal they made. I asked him if he liked her, and he said no. I thought this was super weird and even told him not to lead her on, but he said that she didn't take it seriously and that she told him she didn't see it that way. It was our last week of school last week, so we didn't have anything planned for class, our teacher hooked up the smart board to his switch, and I got there late and saw he had been playing, but when I pulled out my chair, it was kind of far from his (he was closer to the screen, and I was way behind a bunch of people), so he waited till the round was over and gave his controller to someone else, then bought a new chair to sit next to me. He was close as usual, and I was playing on my DSI while he was just on his phone. I told him to stop looking at Twitter at School because it's Twitter and why would he risk that, so he got on Instagram and stated that he was showing me videos. then we saw this video of a guy pretending to stretch to put his arm around a girl, and he went to do it, and I also tried to do it at the same time, so he just sat back the way had been, then started talking about summer activities and that he has to go visit family but he doesn't want to, and I said that I would help him escape, and he asked if I had an extra room to hide in, and I said no, but that he could share my room with my dog, but that she would put up a fight. Yada yada, we laughed, and then, as we were walking to our next class, he waited with me to meet with one of my friends, and he asked me about my sexuality and ex-girlfriend and said that he was going to have a summer glow up, and that was the last time I spoke with him. I don't know if I'm just reading too much into this or if he might like me. The last time I thought someone liked me, he straight up asked me for advice about another girl.

TL;DR I don't know if this guy likes me because I'm bad at reading people. :\