Hey Entrepreneur!
I wanted to share the story of the past year and a half of my life - a tale of challenges, tech innovation, and a whole lot of snacks. This isn’t just about launching a product; it’s about solving a big problem that inspired an entire platform.
**TL;DR: My buddy and I sold our previous snack subscription box company and made a cool thing**

The Seeds of Discontent

At our previous company, my buddy Mike and I saw how powerful influencer marketing could be. Our business, delivering international snacks to doorsteps, was perfect for social media. But managing these influencer partnerships was a huge headache.
Each new campaign started with excitement but quickly became overwhelming. We dealt with many social media platforms, each with its own rules and metrics. Keeping track of everything felt like trying to solve a puzzle with pieces that kept changing. The tools we used were basic. They helped us send products and payments but didn’t offer much for managing or understanding the big picture.
Tracking our campaign performance was a real pain. With just a small team running our marketing, we were juggling hundreds of influencers at the same time. It was hard to keep an eye on everyone and make quick decisions. Plus, the data we got was often late and messy, making things even more frustrating.
This constant struggle showed us a big gap in our toolkit. We needed a solution that could make managing influencers easier and give us useful insights, something as dynamic and global as our product. This ongoing frustration planted the seeds for what would eventually become our new company.

Market Research: Finding the Pain Points

After selling our previous business, Mike and I took a six-month break. We explored different ideas, from unique apps to a Castle Crashers style game. But our experience working with creators kept pulling us back to marketing. We knew the challenges of influencer marketing needed to be addressed.
We talked to our network in the e-commerce space to see if they had similar problems. The feedback was eye-opening. Many businesses struggled with existing tools, which mostly acted as simple marketplaces, where interactions were brief and not very deep.
Even worse, the few ambassador tools available were expensive and limited. When I searched for an ambassador software tool that worked across all social networks, the options I found required scheduling demos days in advance. They often lacked direct API connections and supported only a few major social media networks. The starting prices were high, often around $5k per month, with costs going up as the program expanded.
This research not only validated our experiences but also showed us a strategic need for our own tool. We realized we needed a solution not just to fill the current gap but also as a key part of our marketing stack for future businesses. We were determined to build something that wouldn’t force us—or anyone else—to pay a crazy amount for effective influencer marketing.

Designing the Dream: Our New Business’ Blueprint

With a clear vision from our frustrations and market research, we set out to create our new business. Our goal was to build a comprehensive tool that would change influencer marketing. Here’s what we focused on:

• **Comprehensive Integration**: We made sure the tool we created works with the top 10 social networks in the US. This unified approach helps marketers manage campaigns across different platforms easily, without juggling multiple tools.
  
• **Dynamic Engagement Tools**: Engagement is key, so we developed real-time interaction capabilities. We built user-friendly native apps for ambassadors on the App Store and Google Play, allowing influencers to stay engaged and responsive. Brands manage their campaigns through a web-based company portal.
  
• **Robust Analytics Engine**: While our analytics engine gives deep insights, we know it needs continuous improvement. We designed it to evolve, offering ongoing updates to refine its capabilities and deliver actionable intelligence.
  
• **Flexible and Fun Engagement**: The points and rewards system was the most important and fun feature to develop. This gamification of the influencer experience encourages participation and loyalty, making marketing campaigns more engaging.
  
• **Advanced Group Segmentation**: We included the ability to segment ambassadors into groups. This allows brands to target certain activities and rewards to specific groups, enhancing the effectiveness of marketing efforts.
  

Each feature of our tool we were creating was designed to address specific pain points we identified. Our goal was to offer a tool that was powerful, efficient, adaptable, and enjoyable for both brands and their ambassador partners.

Launching Our New Business: Embracing User Feedback

After about 18 months of design and development, we started the soft launch of our new business on May 1st. Opting for a soft launch allowed us to focus on real-time feedback and fine-tuning over making a big initial splash. This approach is crucial - not just for introducing our product but for understanding how it fits into the real world, where actual users rely on it.

Initial Rollout and Testing

Our launch a couple of weeks ago marked the start of our public journey. We released our new tool we created with ambassador apps on the App Store and Google Play, and opened our web-based company portal for business use. This phase is not about mass marketing but about engaging with our professional network and early adopters testing everything in real-world conditions. This includes real companies and creators, ensuring our platform is robust and responsive.

Iterative Feedback Integration

Feedback from these early stages is invaluable. We have set up multiple channels to communicate with our initial users to ensure they feel supported and heard. This ongoing dialogue is critical as it helps us identify and implement necessary adjustments quickly. Each piece of feedback is a step towards improving functionality and user experience.

Continued Development Based on Early Insights

Since we are still in the soft launch phase, our focus remains on refining the platform. A recent development was adding the Creator Hub and Company Center about a month ago—enhancements from recognizing limitations in our initial setup.
**Creator Hub**: The Creator Hub allows businesses to manage their ambassador relationships dynamically. Companies can discover and invite creators who match their interests and campaign goals, ensuring more personalized and effective collaborations.
**Company Center**: This feature allows creators to independently discover and apply to various ambassador programs, giving them the freedom to engage with brands that align with their interests.
These features aim to make the connection between companies and creators as seamless and beneficial as possible, accommodating a wide range of marketing strategies and campaign sizes.

How The Tool We Created Works: Streamlining Influencer Marketing

Our tool is designed to simplify and enhance the influencer marketing process for both companies and creators. Here’s a step-by-step breakdown of how our platform works:

1. **Signup and Integration**

• Companies can quickly create customizable signup forms. They can also invite new ambassadors directly from the Creator Hub that match their interests. This flexibility helps integrate Social Strudel into existing marketing workflows.

1. **Ambassador Onboarding**

• Creators apply to become ambassadors, download the Social Strudel app, and connect their social media accounts. This ensures that once approved, creators can start engaging with brand campaigns promptly.

1. **Application Review**

• Companies get notifications of new applicants and can approve or decline them based on their fit and relevance to marketing goals. This step ensures only the best ambassadors represent the brand.

1. **Targeted Segmentation**

• Companies can segment ambassadors into groups, allowing them to tailor activities and communications. This supports targeted marketing strategies and more personalized engagement.

1. **Activity Management**

• Companies set up new activities on various social platforms for ambassadors. Examples include:
  
  • **Instagram**: Create a photo post featuring the brand’s latest snack box and use specific hashtags.
  • **TikTok**: Develop a short video showing a fun unboxing of the product, encouraging engagement through likes and comments.
  • **Twitch**: Host a live stream where the ambassador tries snacks from the box during a gaming session, discussing favorites with viewers.
• These are just examples, and activities can be tailored to fit different platforms and goals.
  

1. **Real-Time Notifications**

• Creators get notifications about new activities through push notifications and email. They can browse the app for available activities, ensuring they never miss an opportunity.

1. **Submission and Verification**

• Creators submit proof of activity completion directly through the app. This makes managing submissions easy and organized for companies.

1. **Activity Approval**

• Companies review submitted activities, approving or declining them based on quality and alignment with campaign objectives. This maintains high standards and ensures effectiveness.

1. **Rewards and Motivation**

• Upon approval, creators earn points, which can be redeemed for various rewards. This system motivates creators to produce high-quality content and stay engaged.

1. **Custom Rewards Creation**

• Companies create custom rewards, ranging from products, discounts, to unique experiences, or even cash. This flexibility allows brands to align rewards with their strategies and ambassador preferences.

1. **Reward Notifications and Redemption**

• Creators are notified of available rewards and can redeem their points. This keeps creators motivated and engaged.

1. **Reward Distribution Management**

• Companies are notified about reward redemptions and distribute rewards accordingly. This final step ensures creators are compensated for their efforts, and companies can manage reward distribution easily.

Looking Forward: The Road Ahead for Us

As we continue with our new business, we are committed to not just meeting but exceeding the evolving needs of digital marketing. We’ve only just begun to tap into our platform’s potential, and our roadmap is geared towards enhancing our service and expanding our reach.

Enhanced Integration Capabilities

We aim to expand our platform’s integration capabilities, adding support for social networks like WhatsApp, Discord, Telegram, and Quora, and adapting to new emerging platforms like the anticipated Vine 2. By covering more platforms, we provide our users with tools to engage with audiences everywhere online.

Advanced Analytics and AI Implementation

Understanding the crucial role of data, we plan to enhance our analytics engine with advanced metrics and predictive analytics. By integrating AI, we aim to give users insights that reflect current trends and anticipate future behaviors.

Continued Focus on User Experience

User feedback is key and remains a cornerstone of our development. We are committed to refining the user experience based on real usage and feedback. This includes enhancing our mobile apps and ensuring the Creator Hub and Company Center are intuitive and robust. Both are still in early stages, and we are actively working to improve these features.

Expanding Educational Resources

To help users fully leverage the tool we created, we plan to expand our educational resources. This includes tutorials, best practice guides, and case studies for new users, and advanced content for experienced marketers to refine their strategies.

Final Reflections

If you've stuck with me this long through our story, thank you! Reflecting on this journey, it’s clear that every challenge and setback helped shape our vision and refine our approach. From the initial frustrations to the detailed market research, every step has been a learning experience. We're excited about the future and committed to improving our platform constantly to meet the evolving needs of our users and potential users. If you have any questions or feedback at all, I’d love to hear it! Your insights and support mean a lot as my partner and I continue to grow and innovate.

My FH and I agreed months ago that our money would be better used on a wedding coordinator than some decor options. During this move, I sacrificed the option of the chivari chairs. I thought that I had made peace with it, but it keeps coming up in my mind. Yes, they're 100% prettier, but I know deep down is isn't a "need." I've included a picture of the free chairs and the chivari chairs in the venue setting. Can someone please talk me off the financial ledge and tell me that the free chairs are fine? Like at the end of the day, no one is going to remember right? Not even really me?

Spiritual Growth

1. Daily Prayer: Commit to daily prayer sessions asking for strength and guidance.
2. Scripture Reading: Read and meditate on scriptures that focus on strength and recovery.
3. Worship: Participate in regular worship services to reinforce your spiritual foundation.
4. Faith Affirmations: Use Bible verses as affirmations; repeat them during cravings.
5. Confession: Regularly confess struggles to a trusted spiritual leader or trusted friend.
6. Fasting: Occasionally fast to seek clarity and reinforce spiritual discipline.
7. Spiritual Retreats: Attend retreats for focused spiritual renewal.
8. Christian Meditation: Practice Christian meditation (pondering scripture, etc.) to calm the mind and spirit.
9. Listening to Gospel Music: Use uplifting music to enhance spiritual connection.
10. Prayer Journaling: Keep a journal of prayers and God’s responses.

Community Engagement

1. Church Support Groups: Join groups for individuals struggling with addiction.
2. Accountability Partner: Partner with a fellow believer who can provide support and accountability.
3. Volunteering: Engage in church-related volunteer work to stay busy and inspired.
4. Christian Counseling: Seek professional counseling from a Christian perspective.
5. Family Involvement: Involve your family in your journey through church events.
6. Youth Mentorship: Mentor youth, sharing your experiences and learning from service.
7. Online Christian Communities: Participate in online forums or groups for spiritual support.
8. Testimony Sharing: Share your journey at church gatherings to inspire and receive support.
9. Bible Study Groups: Regularly attend Bible study to deepen faith and community ties.
10. Church Activities: Be an active participant in church events and functions.

Personal Development

1. Routine Exercise: Incorporate regular physical activity to reduce stress.
2. Healthy Diet: Maintain a nutritious diet to improve overall well-being.
3. Reading Christian Literature: Read books that encourage spiritual growth and recovery.
4. Creative Arts: Use arts like painting or writing to express feelings and reflect.
5. Time Management: Structure your day to minimize idle time that could lead to cravings.
6. Goal Setting: Set short and long-term goals that align with your spiritual values.
7. Learning New Skills: Take up hobbies or classes that keep you engaged and learning.
8. Rest and Sleep: Ensure sufficient rest to maintain physical and mental health.
9. Nature Walks: Spend time in nature to find peace and perspective.
10. Avoiding Triggers: Identify and avoid situations or people that trigger cravings.

Coping Techniques

1. Deep Breathing: Practice deep breathing exercises during moments of craving.
2. Mindfulness: Practice mindfulness to stay present and reduce anxiety.
3. Assertiveness Training: Learn to assertively say no to temptations.
4. Stress Management: Develop strategies to handle stress without resorting to substances.
5. Emotional Journaling: Use journaling to process emotions healthily.
6. Self-Reflection: Regularly reflect on personal progress and setbacks.
7. Positive Visualization: Use visualization techniques to imagine a sober life.
8. Gratitude Lists: Regularly list things you are grateful for.
9. Reward System: Set up a reward system for reaching sobriety milestones.
10. Relaxation Techniques: Learn and apply relaxation techniques.

Support Systems

1. Peer Support: Regularly meet with a peer group for encouragement and advice.
2. Spiritual Guidance: Seek regular guidance from a pastor or spiritual mentor.
3. Therapeutic Relationships: Maintain therapeutic relationships that reinforce recovery.
4. Family Counseling: Engage in family counseling to repair relationships affected by addiction.
5. Professional Help: Don’t hesitate to seek help from addiction specialists.
6. Educational Workshops: Attend workshops that teach coping skills for addiction.
7. Supportive Friends: Cultivate friendships with those who support your recovery journey.
8. Avoiding Negative Influences: Steer clear of environments and individuals that undermine recovery.
9. Church Elders: Reach out to church elders for wisdom and support.
10. Sponsorship: Consider a 12-step program with a sponsor who shares your faith.

Renewal and Reflection

1. Anniversary Reflections: Reflect on the progress made over each year of recovery.
2. Spiritual Renewal Days: Designate days for intensified prayer and meditation.
3. Baptism or Re-baptism: Consider this as a symbolic fresh start.
4. Witnessing to Others: Use your story to help others in their battles with addiction.
5. Spiritual Literature: Delve deeper into spiritual texts for insights and inspiration.
6. Pastoral Visits: Invite pastoral visits for home blessing and personal encouragement.
7. Renewing Vows: Renew personal vows of sobriety in a ceremonial way.
8. Pilgrimage: Undertake a spiritual pilgrimage as a form of personal and spiritual exploration.
9. Reflection Retreats: Engage in retreats specifically focused on overcoming past habits.
10. Memorializing Milestones: Create physical or digital memorials of your recovery milestones.

Emotional Resilience

1. Emotional Awareness: Develop awareness of emotions and triggers that lead to cravings.
2. Seek Forgiveness: Embrace forgiveness, both from others and for yourself.
3. Offer Forgiveness: Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt you, releasing bitterness.
4. Spiritual Songs: Sing or listen to spiritual songs that uplift and comfort.
5. Hope Messages: Write down messages of hope and revisit them during tough times.
6. Encouragement Letters: Write letters of encouragement to yourself for future moments of weakness.
7. Daily Devotionals: Follow a daily devotional plan that addresses addiction recovery.
8. Prayer Chains: Initiate or join prayer chains for continuous spiritual support.
9. Healing Services: Attend healing services focused on emotional and spiritual restoration.
10. Scriptural Promises: Memorize promises from the Bible that assure support and deliverance.

Social Connectivity

1. Social Activities: Organize or participate in sober social gatherings with fellow church members.
2. Church Family Outreach: Engage in church family outreach programs to build a supportive community.
3. Mentoring Others: Become a mentor to others struggling with addiction, sharing lessons and faith.
4. Recovery Testimonials: Regularly give testimonials at recovery meetings to inspire and affirm.
5. Family Devotions: Hold regular devotions with family to strengthen bonds and mutual support.
6. Prayer Groups: Form or join small prayer groups focused on overcoming addiction.
7. Christian Conferences: Attend Christian conferences on recovery and personal growth.
8. Community Service Projects: Lead or participate in community service projects to foster a sense of purpose.
9. Recovery Celebrations: Celebrate recovery milestones with your church community.
10. Faith-Based Podcasts: Listen to and discuss faith-based podcasts on overcoming challenges.

Mindset and Lifestyle

1. Optimism: Cultivate an optimistic outlook based on faith and hope in God’s plan.
2. Daily Affirmations: Start the day with Christian affirmations about strength and recovery.
3. Mindfulness of God’s Presence: Continuously remind yourself of God’s presence in your life.
4. Avoiding Idleness: Keep yourself busy with meaningful activities that align with Christian values.
5. Spiritual Biographies: Read biographies of Christians who overcame significant struggles.
6. Health Check-Ups: Regularly attend health check-ups to monitor physical health during recovery.
7. Sabbath Rest: Observe Sabbath rest as a time to rejuvenate spiritually and physically.
8. Christian Movies: Watch movies with Christian themes that reinforce your resolve and values.
9. Spiritual Accountability: Regularly review your spiritual and recovery progress with a mentor.
10. Prayer Walks: Incorporate prayer walks as a way to combine physical activity and spiritual meditation.

Continued Learning and Growth

1. Biblical Courses: Take courses on biblical studies that relate to healing and redemption.
2. Spiritual Workshops: Attend workshops that focus on spiritual growth and overcoming addictions.
3. Faith-Based Counseling Techniques: Learn counseling techniques that are based on Christian principles.
4. Scripture Memorization: Engage in scripture memorization to strengthen spiritual warfare against cravings.
5. Pastoral Workshops: Participate in workshops offered by pastors that focus on living a sober life.
6. Faith and Science: Explore the intersection of faith and science in understanding addiction.
7. Christian Leadership Courses: Take courses in Christian leadership to empower your role in the community.
8. Retelling Your Story: Learn to retell your story in ways that highlight God’s grace and your growth.
9. Spiritual Discernment: Enhance spiritual discernment to recognize paths and choices that support sobriety.
10. Continuous Prayer: Maintain an attitude of continuous prayer, acknowledging dependence on God for daily victory over addiction.

I am a 29 year old single mother of two boys ages 5 and 7. I have been divorced for about 5 years. my ex-husband and I split amicably and he is still very active in their lives but lives in a different state.
Last year I moved to a Bible Belt state for work with a bad public school systems so I sent my boys to a private Christian School where they also go to after school care. Our family is not Christian but I wanted my boys to have the best possible education they could so I sent them there.
There have been a couple father-son events hosted by the school and after-school program that I have attended with the boys so that they did not feel left out. As a result of this two twin boys age 7 took a special interest in my boys. After these two twin boys realized that I was a single mother over the course of the school year they started relentlessly bullying my boys. They started calling them names and saying that divorce is a sin and made fun of them for not having a dad. Everyday on the car ride home from after school care they would cry and tell me all the mean things that these two twin boys would say to them.
My breaking point came when I got an incident slip from the after-school program that stated that one of the twins had pushed down my 5-year-old and called him a bastard. I was absolutely Furious. I was so mad I did not know how to respond I felt helpless and guilty. I was up late thinking about the situation.
Using the incident slip that I got from the after-school program I found the mother's Facebook. After going through her pictures she had tagged her husband, so I went on his profile. I saw the pages that he liked and the groups that he was a part of . I noticed that he was a member of a local running club. I joined this running club and started showing up in the sluttiest functional workout outfits that I owned. It was not long before he started talking to me and we started running together. After running together a couple times I got his phone number. He started texting me Non-Stop, talking shit about his wife telling me about how attractive he thought that I was and even sent me naked pictures. I was not really attracted to him and I was swinging way below my weight class but I invited him over to my house during my lunch break and I had sex with him. After we had sex and I got proof that we had sex then I blocked his phone number. Shortly after got the twins mother's phone number and sent her screenshots of all of our text messages. I sent her all of the naked pictures he had sent me and the proof that we had had sex from a disposable cell phone.
Nobody knows that it was me that had sex with her husband not even her but I heard it through the schools mommy gossip channels that she has filed for divorce. I broke up these twin boys home because they were bullying my children about having a single mother and now their mother is a single mother. I told my closest best friend who lives in another state and she says that I went too far and Im an asshole for destroying their home. now I feel guilty. Am I the asshole.

I know the title sounds a little ridiculous but hear me out.
I never had any kind of good luck with dating apps. I dont think im bad looking but it was moreso whom I matched up with. But thats not important. On November 14(yes I know the date) I matched with my ex. She was really pretty, and exactly my type. And we hit it off instantly.
We talked CONSTANTLY for a few months. We both watched an anime together. We went on 4 dates where we both drove an hour and a half to eachother’s towns twice. And eventually we tried a relationship. However, due to her having a lot of personal problems she determined we shouldnt continue our relationship. So it lasted 13 days.
We didnt talk for a while, but when we did we started off slow and being friendly again. Then I asked her if she wanted to go out again (she said she was much mentally better) however she denied. But she couldnt figure out why. She said to me I was the coolest person she ever went on a date with, and I deserve the best person ever when we broke up. So i know it couldnt have been me. She just thought it wouldnt be a good idea to try again. And I figured she must mentally be working on herself, not looking for relationsuips and she agreed that she was doing that. However the next week comes around and shes going on dates with people and I’m a little sad. And we talked for an hour on the phone and came to the conclusion it might be best we dont talk. At all. I dont think it will be forever but at least for a while. Much longer than last time
So now to NASB2. If you noticed, i said we started talking in November. The game came out in November. And I was hooked to it for a while. However whenever this girl and I had long sessions of texting, I generally left the game on the menu. And we talked for hours. And like I said this was constant
Last week, I listened to a video that had the menu theme in the background and i couldnt finish the video.i broke down for an hour. The song just reminds me of being so excited about this girl, being so hopeful and happy. She really made me feel a way I havent felt since my first ex almost 8 years ago (we dated for 4 years). I jus couldnt help but picture those nights I stayed up talking about her favorite anime (the one we watched). And to be honest, even if I see the game, like in a game store, it makes me a little upset.
And I know this sounds ridiculous. How can a kids game make you so upset and frankly i dont know. Does anyone have any tips or ways to get through this? I want to be able to enjoy the game again and not randomly have breakdowns

On today’s episode of Catholic Shenanigans I introduce you to Harrison Butkiss (whoops did I say that?) when he’s not slipping and falling on the football field he’s giving half ass commencement speeches at various colleges. His most recent one has resulted in a massive scandal. Before we delve into this sordid tale let me introduce you to some of his hobbies. Crushing his wife’s career and having children… Btw his wife is an extremely accomplished woman who holds a degree in computer science and Spanish.
Let’s go back to the speech in it he hits the trifecta of Catholic talking points, he manages to be anti LGBTQ, rail against IVF and tells women their lives don’t begin until they have babies. (Hold on I thought life began at conception…it’s not to late for an abortion for me!!)
The part that irritates me the most is when he says “embrace your roles as homemakers” directing this comment at women. It’s so inappropriate to say at a college graduation. What’s worse is his mother holds a masters degree and works in oncology at Emory University. He’s crapping on all accomplished women an boiling all of us down to our reproductive abilities and domestic use.
If we look at his instagram we can see he has virtually no pictures of his family or wife and the entire page is made up of pictures of him in carefully manicured suits with bible verses in the caption. Unlike most NFL stars who take time to appreciate their partners Butkiss does not even acknowledge the existence of Isabelle his most accomplished wife.
The only time he speaks about his wife is when he’s praising her for embracing her role as a baby machine and human laundry mat. In the next breath he attempts to be cleaver and works in a Taylor Swift quote while referring to yet another accomplished woman as “my teammates girlfriend” and smirks while doing it. Nothing illustrates the distain that he holds for women like this quote. Almost as if to say Taylor would be no one without Travis and she is defined by her relationship.
It’s good that this kind of rhetoric is making it to the mainstream. I want everyone to see what theses so called “traditional Catholics” are about..rewinding time to a day when women couldn’t buy houses, hold property or open a line of credit….

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/ThrowRASadsadboon posting in relationship_advice
Concluded as per OOP
1 update - Medium
Original - 17th February 2024
Update - 23rd February 2024
Previous BORU is here
1 New Update
Update 2 - 15th May 2024
​
I (29M) lost my wife three years ago. Started dating again, and new girlfriend (32F) wants to visit my wife's grave.
​
I am one of many who lost someone in that damn 2020. She was my world and we had our future all set up, she wanted children too by 2021, and then she was gone.
I felt I had lost all sense of purpose and after an agonizing year, moved away - not too far, but not close either. I didn't feel like I could breathe in that town. Still, every Saturday I get back and visit her resting place.
I just functioned for about two years - I am not depressed or anything like that, but I just functioned. Until I met who we will call Ada last year.
We started talking and hanging out together. She can be a bit haughty with people she doesn't know well but I was surprised to find out how sweet and kind she is under the ice. She gave me something to look forward to again. She likes to do most of the talking herself, which is fine with me because I never know what to say.
She knows everything about my wife, and this didn't discourage her. She knows I am doing therapy and still mourning, but she never left me alone. I asked her to tell me if anything I do or say makes her feel uncomfortable or like she's not a priority - she said that as of now I am doing nothing of the sort. She knows what I do every Saturday morning, and never objected to it. But today she said she would like to "meet her", as in accompany me in visiting her grave.
I feel conflicted about this. On one hand I respect and feel touched by her wish, on other it feels... weird, for a guy to take the new girlfriend where the first wife is buried. How should I approach this? Is it too soon, should I ask her to wait for that?
TL;DR I am a widower who started dating. Girlfriend wants to visit my wife's grave and I have conflicting feelings about it.
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Comments
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jiddlyjidson
Waiting is fine if you are not ready. It feels like she wants to support you in something that was (and am sure still is) pretty traumatic. Joining you to visit isn’t about meeting your wife, it’s about being with you whilst you are still grieving/recovering.
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Inner-Pianist-7628
Came here to say this last part. She genuinely wants to be apart of your life and support you bro. This is actually kind of beautiful. On the flip note it’s totally understandable that you might not be ready though.

OOP: Thank you. I admit that one of my biggest concerns is that I don't want to take advantage of her goodwill, even unintentionally. Her kindness and patience are near infinite, but I told her I don't want our relationship to be all about this, it would not be fair for her. She reassured me she doesn't feel taken advantage of and that I do a lot to make her feel loved and appreciated for who she is, but at the same she recognizes this is a part of me she's willing to accept to be with me.
To clarify, I don't do anything dramatic like talking to her grave or crying my eyes out when I visit. I just keep it clean, water the flowers and replace the dead ones, check the wear and tear on the stone, and clean the glass with her picture.

​
Update - 6 days later
​
Some additional info and an update.
Some redditors and some people around us were worried that my relationship with Ada is just a rebound. I admit is something that I too was worried about, and Ada told me she didn't have long lasting expectations at first.
We began dating in April 2023, but as things progressed and she saw my intentions are serious and I'm committed, her doubts about me were gone. She says we are made of the same stuff - we are two loyal, committed and hardworking people and she wants a future with me. And so do I. We are looking for a new place to share and I'm looking for the ring to make my proposal.
I admit that one of my biggest concerns is that I don't want to take advantage of her goodwill, even unintentionally. Her kindness and patience are near infinite, but I told her I don't want our relationship to be all about my past, it would not be fair for her. She reassured me she doesn't feel taken advantage of and that I do a lot to make her feel loved and appreciated for who she is, but at the same she recognizes this is a part of me she's willing to accept to be with me.
To my surprise, everyone approves of us - my parents, Ada's parents, and my late wife's mother. We never got any backlash.
​
On the update. I talked about this with my therapist. She feels that based on what she knows about Ada and the way she always behaved about this, that bringing her to my wife's grave will probably be a positive thing. So I told Ada that if she feels like it, I'd be glad to take her with me this Saturday. She was happy to hear this, she usually works on Saturday mornings, but said she'd take the morning off for me.
However I had unexpected things come up for tomorrow - I have to cover for a sick coworker, which means I'll be taken all morning and great part of the afternoon. It happens, and when it happens I either go on Friday or Sunday. I decided to go this afternoon (we are in Europe, it's evening here) and asked Ada if she wanted to come along - and she readily agreed.
We didn't talk much during the drive. When we arrived, we made our way to my wife's tombstone and I just said "Well, here she is". I fetched the water for the flowers and start my usual routine, Ada just crouched as if to examine it. Then she just helped me with the caretaking routine, removing the dead leaves and flowers, and cleaning the picture and the light. We then took a walk around the cemetery (might sound weird, but it's not unusual here as many cemeteries double as parks here) then sat outside for a smoke before the drive back.
We talked a bit, and Ada, who's quite the stoic, got a little emotional. She was happy I had let her in on such what for me is a particularly intimate and sacred place, but also shaken because after all the talking we had done of my late wife she subconsciously thought of her as someone she'd want to meet and be friends with, but seeing the grave reminded and cemented the fact that this amazing woman is gone. It was a bit of shaking for me too seeing her tearing up, since she's the most stoic woman I've ever met, but also made me think how this woman is a rare gem.
I don't doubt that in different circumstances, my late wife and Ada would have been great friends. And I'm a very lucky guy for finding not one, but two amazing woman which gave and still give my life meaning every day.
TL;DR I brought my girlfriend to my late wife's grave, and things went well.
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Comments
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TBagger1234
I’ve read so many posts here about people who have lost their partner and their new partner wants them to remove all memory of them as if they aren’t an important part of your life story. Ada is a good one. All the best OP!

OOP: Yeah, I read some of those posts too. Stuff of nightmares.

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grandmasvilla
You are blessed to meet someone like Ada who is kind and understanding. Show your appreciation for her with your love and make her happy for the rest of your life. All the best.

OOP: Naturally, my friend. Making her happy and smile every day is my top priority. She gave me another chance at life.

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Update 2 - 3 months later
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Hello, I hope everyone here is well.
For a couple of months I had forgotten about this account, but I gave it a look the other day and read again all the beautiful comments and some very touching private messages. Again, thank you all for your interest and kindness.
Ada and I are doing well and we have found a place to move in together. If all goes well we'll be living together by July. Last month was the fourth anniversary of my late wife's passing. Ada was with me and held my hand.
I was a bit depressed like I am always am on our anniversaries, but Ada made it better. Sometimes I dream about my late wife, her coming back home, but either she never talks or I never remember what she says. However, when I dreamed her that night, in the dream there was Ada as well and they met each other. She was very happy about us and told me she's happy Ada is there for me when she can't.
I talked with Ada about the dream, and we agreed it's my brain telling me it's okay to move on. I'll always love, honor and cherish my late wife, but now there is Ada who is giving me so much and deserves to be happy, to be loved and honored the way she deserves. And I don't intend to disappoint her.
As an aside, Ada also said that who knows, it could also be the spirit of my late wife visiting me in the only place she can, my dreams. She says we can see like that if we take the spiritual approach. Honestly I wouldn't know, death is one of those mysteries only those who passed have discovered, and they can't tell us.
We are doing well. We have also managed to program our first true vacation together and I was proud to formally introduce Ada as my partner when my company's CEO invited me to dinner with her husband.
It's an exciting new journey and we are thrilled to see where it will lead us. We are a team and we have a game plan.
TL;dr Things are good.
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Comments
BigIronBruce

I talked with Ada about the dream, and we agreed it's my brain telling me it's okay to move on

This is very sweet but I want to caution you that grief is complicated and recovery does not always happen in a straight line. You might sometimes have really complicated feelings of betrayal or heartbreak in the future and that's normal.
It's ok to move on, I'm sure your wife would want that but be careful of interpreting dreams.
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mak_zaddy
I love a great Reddit update. A true palate cleanser.
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I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.

This is my first post and I’m not sure what to say and what not to say. I’m sorry if this isn’t a fun read I just need help. My fiancée just attempted suicide this morning. She’s made attempts before, the same way as she did this morning. I was not in the picture with her at the time but she disclosed that to me before, so I would always try to make sure she wasn’t thinking about it when we fought.
We had a fight last night, and ended on good terms. Then at 5 am I get a message worded professionally from her, but saying she loves me and wont be a burden on me. Sometimes she sends those type of messages so I asked if this was her implying self harm. An hour goes by and my future mother in law calls me screaming that my fiancée took pills and is going to the ER. It’s been 10 hours and no update at all. I went to the hospital and got screamed at by the dad. They blame me. Idk what to do. Does anyone have advice or know when I should expect her to get better (I am not told anything, for all I know this post won’t even be that accurate on the condition).

https://apnews.com/article/artificial-intelligence-ai-investment-congress-millions-8f3a051faadc50d2366e8a88a69c5470
Here’s a concise summary of the article titled “Senators urge $32 billion in emergency spending on AI after finishing yearlong review”:
A bipartisan group of four senators, led by Majority Leader Chuck Schumer, recommends that Congress allocate at least $32 billion over the next three years to develop artificial intelligence (AI) and establish safeguards around it. The senators emphasize the need to “harness the opportunities and address the risks” of rapidly advancing AI technology. Their report includes policy recommendations such as boosting U.S. investments in AI research, enhancing transparency, and studying the impact of AI on jobs and the workforce.

can you talk a bit about the implications of this?

Certainly! The proposed $32 billion emergency spending on artificial intelligence (AI) by Congress has significant implications for various aspects:

1. Technological Advancements: Increased funding can accelerate AI research, development, and deployment. This investment may lead to breakthroughs in areas such as natural language processing, computer vision, and robotics.
2. Economic Growth: A robust AI ecosystem can drive economic growth by fostering innovation, creating jobs, and enhancing productivity. The U.S. aims to remain competitive globally by investing in AI capabilities¹.
3. National Security: The Department of Defense’s (DoD) investment in AI contracts reflects the importance of AI in military applications. Enhanced AI capabilities can improve defense strategies, autonomous systems, and cybersecurity².
4. Ethical and Regulatory Challenges: As AI adoption grows, policymakers must address ethical concerns, bias, privacy, and transparency. Congress needs to strike a balance between promoting AI innovation and safeguarding against potential risks³.
5. Workforce Impact: AI adoption may disrupt certain job markets while creating new opportunities. Congress should consider reskilling programs and policies to mitigate workforce displacement³.
6. International Cooperation: The U.S. must collaborate with other nations to set global standards for AI governance. Leadership in AI ethics and norms is crucial to prevent misuse and promote responsible AI⁴.

In summary, the proposed investment can propel AI advancements, but policymakers must carefully navigate challenges to ensure responsible and beneficial AI deployment.

make it zanier

Certainly! Let’s crank up the zaniness to 11 and dive into the whimsical world of AI-fueled absurdity. 🚀
Title: “Congress Unleashes $32 Billion for AI: Robot Dance Battles and Quantum Socks!”
Subtitle (because why not?): “Senators Moonwalk into the Future, Armed with Laser Pointers and Neural Net-Powered Pogo Sticks”
In a parallel universe where senators wear propeller hats and debate policy while riding unicycles, the halls of Congress echo with the clatter of mechanical keyboards and the occasional burst of interpretive dance. Yes, my friends, it’s the AI Renaissance, and Uncle Sam is throwing down some serious cash for the future of artificial intelligence.
Picture this: Senator Chuck Schumer, bedecked in a neon-green lab coat, stands before a giant chalkboard covered in equations. His mission? To allocate $32 billion for AI research, but with a twist. Forget boring pie charts and line graphs—this budget proposal is written in limericks and haikus. 📊🎩
Senator Limerick #1:
There once was a senator named Lou, Whose love for AI was quite true. He said, "Let’s fund the bots, Teach 'em quantum physics and lots, And maybe they’ll write poetry too!"
Meanwhile, Senator Cynthia, armed with a pocket-sized quantum computer, proposes a line item for “Quantum Socks.” Yes, you read that correctly. These socks, infused with subatomic particles, promise to keep your feet warm in multiple dimensions. 🧦🌌
Senator Cynthia’s Quantum Sock Sales Pitch:
"Step into the future, my friends! Our socks defy space-time bends. They’ll keep your toes cozy, While you surf parallel seas, And dance the Cha-Cha with quarks and quends!"
But wait, there’s more! Senator Bob, wearing a propeller beanie and roller skates, insists on investing in AI-powered pogo sticks. Imagine bouncing to work, your pogo stick analyzing traffic patterns and composing personalized jingles about your morning coffee. ☕🎶
Senator Bob’s Pogo Stick Anthem:
"Up and down, up and down we go, On our AI pogo sticks, don’t you know? They’ll calculate the hops, Predict lunar flip-flops, And shout, ‘Quantum leap!’ as we soar through the rainbow!"
And so, my fellow Redditors, as Congress debates the merits of robot dance battles and neural net-generated knock-knock jokes, we can’t help but wonder: Is this madness or genius? Either way, buckle up, because the AI revolution just got a whole lot zanier! 🤖🎉
Feel free to share this with the Circuit Keepers subreddit, and may your quantum socks always match your enthusiasm! 😄🌈

I ran a test buy from Weidian store thru Hoobuy. Heres how the process went for me...
Everything was pretty simple all the way up to the checkout. You pick your product(s), load it to the Hoobuy site, add it to cart (I ordered 3 things), pay for it and Hoobuy takes it from there simple...
Now once you pay for it it's out of your hands. Let me say the contact option is utterly useless as I've sent multiple chat request and emails with no response and the first email was sent 25 days ago.
On to the process Hoobuy will accept payment and move the purchase along to the orders tab where you'll be given an order number for the complete order at the warehouse (I.E. if its multiple products it's still one order number). Now, each product will be given status updates individually (received, quality inspection, submit parcels, shipped).
Back to the order. 3 products (shoes) same store, same day, and under same order number. While one product was QC'ed bonus pics taken and ready for me to pick shipping in 2 days the others have been sitting in a received status for 30 days with no movement as I'm writing this.
For the pair that was made available to be shipped (parcel). I choose the cheapest option USPS in my case. After purchasing shipping for 1 product (each product will have its own shipping price) again I saw this process happen quickly. From the time I paid for shipping to the time I received a picture of the package ready to be picked up to be shipped, was a day and I was provided with a tracking number. Even though I had a tracking number USPS didn't have an update until 11 days later when it was picked up by a shipping partner then given to USPS. From that point it was pretty standard post office stuff took about 5 days for the item to arrive after the post office got it.
SHORT Story!!!!!!!!!!!!!
17 Apr order submitted 22 Apr order arrived at Hoobuy warehouse 23 Apr it was stored 24 Apr it was packaged 25 Apr Shipping Label created 06 May Arrived at airport and picked up by shipping partner 09 May left shipping partner 12 May arrived at USPS 16 May I received the product in great condition.
So still waiting on 2 products but the one that came is fire!! Hopefully this helps!

Link for all the chapters available here: Engines of Arachnea on Royal Road
The Colonel’s tent was leaking again. Ordinarily such a mistake would’ve earned his adjutant an hour-long dressing down and possibly, if the Colonel was feeling particularly enthusiastic, a sharp backhanded slap across the face. After all, a leaky tent could hardly be said to be hermetically sealed, now could it? But this affront to his sensibilities paled in comparison to the utter travesty and exemplar of sheer incompetence that now sat before his desk, a sagging wreck of a man in the tattered uniform of a Fleet officer. Colonel Moch Leelan curled his lip at it and barked:
“Once more, if you please. And I don’t want this on record,” he added, darting a look at the clerk poised to take dictation in the corner of the room, “Not a word of this gets out. There’s been enough of a snafu already, and the brass won’t stop shitting down my neck about Mound 13 and the loss of Prota’s pestilential pet project. Did you hear me, man? I said start from the beginning!”
Outside the monsoon was intensifying into one of those proverbial downpours which prompted doddering old men to remark that it was ‘raining cats and dogs’, though what either a cat or a dog were, none could now say. A trickle of it seeped in like a string of winking glass beads, catching the orange glow of the gas lamp and turning into sparks of amber, into seeds of flame. They dripped on the bald man seated on the low footstool, and he raised his head to meet the scornful gaze of the Colonel, grey eyes unabashed and unafraid. He spoke then, in a hoarse voice that matched his pallid flesh and buzzard nose:
“It was the third day of reconnaissance. We were forced to abandon our pack-beasts in the mire. My assistant and I—”
“Name, rank and serial number!” Colonel Leelan interrupted, for the sole purpose of seeing the coward blink and quaver like the worm he was. But in that he was to be disappointed, for the man continued in the same flat tone:
“Sollem Deschane, Lord Navigator, 3^rd Pathfinder Regiment, serial number 18911944. We received orders from the Admiralty and Fleet Command to reconnoiter the area around the enemy concentration designated as Mound Euler. I was to lead a platoon of twenty handpicked volunteers across the river Foss at its lowest point, then scale the outlying cliffs to get better readings as we mapped out the approaches to Mound Euler. It was the third day of reconnaissance. We were forced to abandon our myropods in the mud and carry our own gear. My assistant navigator Rene Louvoture and I noticed a discrepancy with our visually confirmed data and the aerial sketches of the Aeronautical Division. We quickly worked out that the enemy concentration far exceeded initial estimates by an order of magnitude. Mound Euler is an omega-class colony the likes of which the Fleet has faced only once in its entire existence, during the Scouring of Assail. It is my belief that—”
“Leave your hysterics for later and get on to meat of things,” Leelan snapped. Deschane straightened a bit in his seat and scowled as his layers of bandages shifted. The man was practically mummified by the sheer extent of his wounds that it was a wonder he had managed to limp into the tent in the first place. But the navigator had made a point of refusing to be debriefed in his sick bed and had insisted that he be given no further pain killers. This was to prove that his report was not at all influenced by the effects of opiates, as well as to underline the supposed importance of his eyewitness account as the sole survivor of the siege of Mound 13.
But Colonel Leelan was no fool. He knew the tactic for what it was: a bit of playacting by a soon-to-be-disgraced officer, a desperate attempt to pass himself off as a tragic hero rather than the author of the most monumental military cock-up of the decade.
You may very well get that wish, Deschane, Leelan smirked inwardly. If you play your cards right. You’ll find that I can put on a pantomime as well as the next man.
Deschane regarded him cooly, replying:
“You asked for my report, sir. I am stating the facts as I understand them.”
“Understand?” Leelan guffawed, “There’s precious little to understand about this debacle! Explain to me how a routine scouting mission winds up in the loss of 5,000 men, a Rear-Admiral and an entire frontline outpost! Explain to me how you not only got every last one of your own men slaughtered, but still managed to save your own sorry arse!”
Now that had an effect on the navigator’s bearing. He dropped the holier-than-thou attitude and even pretended to dab at some moisture in corners of his eye. For a moment his mask of iron cracked and he looked tired enough to sleep for a thousand years, never to waken. Then he seemed to recall that his career was at stake and had the temerity to argue with the Colonel:
“We were given faulty intelligence. I made mistakes, I’ll admit that here and now. We should never have continued after our pack animals were trapped in the mire. The gear slowed us down in enemy territory. I can’t wash my hands of the loss of my platoon. They were the best and bravest men I ever fought with, and I will carry the shame of losing them to my grave. The fact that I am still alive when none of them are breathing is an accident that was not of my choosing. As for Mound 13, it was only a matter of time before they were discovered and dealt with. They were only two day’s travel from Mound Euler. In fact, it was miracle they managed to exist for so long undetected.”
Magnificent deflection. Colonel Leelan had to admire the snake and his flawless attempt to pass the blame onto the shoulders of the dead Rear-Admiral Prota.
Yes, I think we can make an arrangement here, the Colonel thought wryly. He waved Deschane’s prattling aside and said:
“This omega-class colony of yours. A mound so large that is beggars belief, you say? Curious, then, that such an object should have escaped your keen senses for three whole days!”
“Visibility in that terrain and climate is poor. But yes, it was another one of my errors.”
“I’m so glad that you agree,” Leelan purred, his words dripping with condescension. He reached into the drawer of his desk and took out a bottle of fermented honeydew. Uncorking it with a loud pop, he poured out two glasses and lifted one to his lips, saying:
“On a related note, it’s funny how the fog of war can obscure so many important details. Even the best commanders can lose their bearings, lose sight of the greater picture, fixate on the wrong things. Take our dearly departed Rear-Admiral Prota, for example (may she rest in the Flight Eternal). Not to speak ill of the dead, but she was assigned an entire sector for her research into enemy behavior. And what does she do with it? Cultural studies! Anthropology! As if the Amits have a culture worth sneezing at! They’ve been working with flint and wood since this primeval war of ours began, and they’ve never taken the hint. Meanwhile, we’ve finally gained the advantage of powder and artillery and mass-produceable gas masks.”
“One big push! That’s all it would take to clear the northern highlands. We have the men, the will and the technology to do it! The last thing we need is some starry-eyed academic telling us that the Amits have somehow found religion. I mean, really!” Colonel Leelan warmed to his subject, “Five thousand soldiers dedicated to safeguarding some blessed cave paintings, right on the frontlines, too! What a waste. Like you said: if you hadn’t led the Amits directly to them, someone else would have down the line.”
“We took steps to ensure they wouldn’t follow us. We tried, but they found the fear-death pheromones—”
“Steps?” Leelan pressed him mercilessly, “What steps, exactly?”
Deschane looked away and said nothing. Leelan sniffed, continuing:
“I thought so. As I was saying, Prota’s project was doomed from the start. It was an ill-conceived, harebrained mission, and now the Admiralty will have to explain to Fleet Command and the general public how it lost an entire regiment in the name of some woman’s flight of fancy. But there is a silver lining to all this. Seeing as how we recaptured what was left of Mound 13 within mere hours of it falling, we think there’s a way to salvage the situation after all. You can be part of that, Deschane. Every victory may have its price, but it must also have its heroes.”
Leelan sipped his honeydew, waiting for the offer he’d made to sink in. Deschane smiled, a humorless crack in his granite features.
“You’re going to make me a hero?” he asked. Leelan nudged the other glass towards him, shrugging:
“And why not? Someone has to wear the medals. ‘Lone Survivor of Desperate Last Stand’,” Leelan exclaimed, dramatically forecasting the future headlines, “He tried to warn them, but did they listen? You get the rest, I imagine. We’ll have to improve some of the details, of course. Like how it was the 3^rd Pathfinder Regiment which held back the flood of Amits in the final hour and ignited the fortress’ ammo depot—”
“We never did that,” Deschane objected, rudely cutting off Leelan’s train of thought, “It was the Divine Engine. I saw it with my own eyes. It broke out of Mound 13 and slaughtered the enemy.”
Leelan sighed.
“Not this again. Deschane, I’d appreciate it if you’d save your hallucinations for the regimental shrink. Think, man! The honor of our unit is at stake here. You have a chance to redeem the men of your platoon, even if you can never truly redeem yourself.”
“I saw it,” Deschane growled, and for a moment Leelan almost reached for his ceremonial saber hanging by its belt on his coatrack, “Sir, it left footprints the size of—”
“For heaven’s sake, you witless worm, the earthquake was felt all the way in the Southern Delta! Not very big one, but certainly enough to account for the avalanches and landslides that took place around Mound 13, not to mention the sinkhole we found you snoring in! It’s certainly not the first time an uncontrolled detonation triggered a seismic event. Deschane, I’ll only say this once: either you get your story straight or by thunder, I’ll bury you so deep in shit you’ll start to think you’re made of it! And you are! If you breathe a word of this delirious vision of yours to the press, you’ll not only receive no medals, but I’ll have you court-martialed faster than you can say ‘diddly-squat’. Which is precisely what you’ll be left with unless you jump like a good boy and ask how high. No honor, no rank, no reputation, no pension. Nothing! Do you understand?”
Colonel Leelan wrathfully thrust the glass at Deschane, spilling most of it in the process.
“Well, do you?”


Deschane hobbled out of the tent, escorted by a pair of grenadiers in fluffy white shakos. They sealed the adhesive lining of the tent airlock after him and the Navigator went on his way, the taste of honeydew lingering on his tongue like a bitter poison. He lifted his mask and hawked up a gob of spit that eloquently described his opinion of the colonel, wiping his scowling mouth with the back of his hand.
Ven was waiting for him with the crutches, a young and rather portly corporal with apple cheeks and a worried, pouting mouth. She helped Deschane as he made the slow and painful walk across the encampment to his field tent, the lord navigator deep in thought. Along the way they cut across the central avenue of the camp where a seemingly endless artillery train was lumbering its way up from the south and curving around the broad talus skirts of Gorgo Plateau, teams of scuttling myropods hitched to six or twelve-pounder guns, their hundreds of tiny legs threshing the soil into a quagmire. Behind them, plodding dejectedly into the rapidly liquefying mud, were ranks upon rank of fresh colonial levees, their brand-new sealant suits creaking loudly at the joints as they made what for most of them would be their first expedition into the surface world.
And what a foray it would prove to be. Almost two hundred thousand men amd women were mustered here at the edge of civilization, poised on the cusp of what was to be the largest surface offensive in recorded history. The Fleet had arrived in the Northern Hinterlands, and it had come to conquer.
"Gangway!" the levees hollered at Ven as she tried to cut a path for Deschane through the line, "Can't you see we's marching 'ere, ya stoopid bint?"
"He's an officer, ain't he?" she screamed back, pointing at the navigator.
Upon noticing the faded chevrons on Deschane's shoulders some of them clumsily snapped to attention, stopping in their tracks. Their comrades behind them, oblivious to this turn of events, bowled right into them, causing a minor stampede. Men and women cursed as they dropped their pristine muskets, never fired in the heat of battle, into the churning soup at their feet, or themselves went sprawling on their hands and knees. Baton-wielding sergeants descended on the mess, screaming for them to get back up, generously assisting them with a boot to the rump or a smack on the side of the head. Deschane looked back at the display for a long moment, as if considering something. Abruptly he grunted at Ven and they continued on their way to the outskirts where the Pathfinders were billeted.
She waited until they were inside the tent and Deschane was back in his sick bed, the navigator turning his back to her in stony silence. Cautiously, she ventured:
“What now, sir?”
“Draw up a list of volunteers,” he rasped, “But do it on the sly. We’re going back out there."
"Very good, sir," Ven squeaked, and went scurrying out of the navigator's chambers, sealing the tent flap softly behind her. She knew that tone and what it signified: the lord navigator had made up his mind, and heaven help whoever would stand in his way.
Link for all the chapters available here: Engines of Arachnea on Royal Road

You know what the best part is about playing Engineer in Team Fortress 2? You get to watch how angry everyone gets when they get shot by your sentry guns. Me and my best friend Jose both main Engineer, and can confirm that the best way to spend your Friday nights after school is to set up a sentry and get ready for the rage. There’s been matches where we haven’t even used our actual guns even once, but racked up lots of kills just because of the sentries.
One day Jose called me up with an idea that was either going to be the stupidest thing ever or the smartest thing ever. He wanted to fill an entire team with only Engineers and watch the chaos unfold. I couldn’t stop laughing at the mental image in my head and agreed with the plan. I joined a Discord server with everyone else on the team.
I convinced my cousin Matthew to join, and he in turn brought along his little brother Zack. According to Matthew, it took quite a bit of convincing because Zack was a Scout main who couldn’t stand Engineers. He eventually got through to his little brother by promising him a Steam gift card. I even got their dad Graham to play along (yes, I have an uncle who plays TF2. How cool is that?). Jose enlisted his friends, who turned into friends of friends and soon enough we had a team of 16 Engineers.
To say that we caused chaos that night was an absolute understatement. As soon as we joined the game the text chat was flooded with messages from the other team wondering what the hell was going on. And they only got worse from that point on. We surrounded our control points with a ring of sentries that people just kept running into. I saw keyboard smashes and heard other teen boys’ voices crack in rage and many, many words that I personally don’t care to repeat here.
The most skilled Engineer was this guy named Craig, who was a friend of one of Jose’s friends. Not only was he the main person capturing the enemy control points with some very strategically placed teleporters, but he was also really friendly and encouraging to all of us. I didn’t know what he looked like, but from his voice it sounded like he was in his early 20s.
Me and Craig started to chat more and more on Discord. He was a super nice guy who was also really fun to talk with. He took time out of his day to teach me how to be an even better Engineer player. Whenever someone started dissing me in the voice chat, he firmly told them to leave me alone. After seeing my fair share of toxicity in the TF2 community, it was nice to know that this complete stranger was looking out for me.
This whole Team Engineer thing became a weekly tradition for us on Friday nights. It was something everyone could look forward to after work or school. One time after everyone logged off and said their goodbyes, Craig sent a message a few hours later in our Discord:
“You guys gotta check this out. I found the weirdest server ever. It’s literally Engineer heaven. Meet me at vl_sentry.”
I was still in the mood to play and I could stay up late tonight, so I hopped back on TF2. I saw that Jose, Graham and this other girl we played with named Lynn were also online. I found vl_sentry and connected to the server. The map was called Valley of the Sentries and it was created by Valve.
It took my computer a little bit to process the map, and it took me even longer than that to process what I was seeing.
The map looked like a chessboard with 3D-sculpted hills. The sky was just pure white. Not even white walls, just the color white. Every square had a blue sentry on it and there were about 4 or 5 other Engineers jumping around, spamming their voice lines. That’s when I realized that we were the only ones there, and there was no red team.
“Hey Sean, glad you could make it :)” Craig said in the text chat. “What the hell is this?” I asked. He told me that this was a server that one of his friends showed him. The friend said he was introduced to the map by a friend of his who knew someone who worked at Valve. Craig then went on to explain that apparently Valley of the Sentries was an experiment to test the limits of the sentry guns and their effect on the servers. Rumor has it that the map is infinite.
“Check this out.” said Jose. He switched to Heavy and immediately got shot down. All of the sentries turned towards him. There were so many of them that it made the game lag a ton. He respawned as Engineer and the sentries just kept on spinning.
“WTF?” I typed. “We tried it with all the other classes and it does the same thing.” said Craig. “It ignores Engineers, but shoots everyone else.” Lynn added. “And that’s why we’re the best class. Engineer power!” Graham joked.
I asked what would happen if you were to play as Spy and sap one of the sentries. “I tried, but you gotta have a godly reaction time to activate it.” said Jose. As soon as he said “godly reaction time”, I knew I had to try it out just for the bragging rights.
Respawn. Shot down. Respawn. Shot down. Respawn. Shot down.
Yeah, I did not have a godly reaction time. The others kept spamming “lol” in the chat each time I failed. I got annoyed pretty quickly and stopped trying. Then out of nowhere, all the sentries turned away from me and started firing at someone. I turned around and all five of us were still standing there. I looked at the top bar that shows how many characters were in the game. There were only five Engineers and they were all on the same team. So what the hell were the sentries targeting?
I started to walk in the direction that the sentries were facing and Jose followed me too. We moved really slow, not only because of the sentries on every square but also the uphill climbs. It was just us two in the chat for a while, talking about seeing each other back at school on Monday while we made our slow walk across the map. Then our conversation was interrupted by a chat message from Lynn.
“Why is there a man in the sky?”
Me and Jose tried to get to Lynn to see what she was talking about as fast as possible, but we moved like snails. To get back to the spawn point, we both switched classes, instantly died and respawned as Engineers. I don’t think we respawned in the same place we started from. I don’t even know where we respawned. There were no landmarks or notable things to help you find your way. Just hills, valleys, and sentries.
I asked Lynn where she was and she just told me she was with Graham and Craig. Only that wasn’t very helpful because we didn’t know where they were either. We stood there, stumped for a minute and a half until Jose got an idea. He said that she should just switch classes and respawn, because then all of the sentries would point toward her and we could follow them all the way back to her. She made the switch, got shot down, and we instantly knew where to find her.
We finally got close enough to kind of make out the vague shape of a few Engineers over the non-existent horizon. Me and Jose were relieved, until all the sentries pointed to our right. I swiveled around and saw them open fire on…nothing. I checked with Jose to see if he caught something I didn’t, but he also didn’t see what they were shooting at. I decided that it wasn’t that important and continued to walk towards the rest of the group.
We met up with Lynn, Craig and Graham, disappointed that we made that trek all for nothing. Even though we were all together now, it just felt so lonely. The only sound coming from my computer was the constant beeping of the sentries in perfect sync. I don’t know why, but it made me so uneasy. I attempted to break the silence by going to the voice lines and playing the iconic Engineer “Nope” soundbite. It echoed across the checkered land with no response.
It was about 12:30 AM at this point and I was starting to feel more and more unsettled with each passing minute. There was just something about this black and white world that I felt creeped out by. Before Craig invited us to come over, there was no one else on the server. Who would even want to play on this map, anyways? It’s so unfairly balanced that only one class can survive. Movement speed was super slow, and you can’t even really do anything except watch the sentries turn and turn and turn forever. It was like hypnosis, except I didn’t feel sleepy or relaxed at all.
Speaking of being sleepy, Jose said he was getting tired and was going to be logging off. We all said goodbye to him and continued chatting amongst ourselves. It sounds stupid, but my stomach dropped when I saw the fifth Engineer portrait disappear. One less person to talk to. One less person to keep myself from wondering what else was out here. I could have sworn that after he left, the beeping got louder.
“So is this map actually infinite?” asked Graham. “Only one way to find out.” Craig said. “Just keep on walking and see if it goes on forever.” “Why don’t you just fire a shotgun and see how far it goes?” Lynn suggested.
I took out the shotgun and fired. The bullet flew off into the white distance and disappeared.
Then I heard the distinct sound of someone getting shot.
A message appeared in the chat, from someone named sentry_check_pattern.
“sentry_check_pattern: stop that”
Once again I looked at the top bar. It just showed four blue Engineers. That meant we were the only ones on the server. Or so we thought.
The chat was flooded with our confusion, almost as if everyone realized at the same time that something wasn’t right. None of us moved an inch.
“What even is this place?” I asked, hoping that the mysterious user would provide me with an answer. “Must be Engineer heaven.” said Graham.
“sentry_check_pattern: more like my personal hell”
This was the moment that made me trust my intuition. I knew there was a reason why I found this map so creepy. I wanted to leave the server, but there was just one thing keeping me back- my own curiosity. My wish to unveil the mysteries of the Valley of the Sentries.
“Okay this is really freaking me out. See ya guys.” said Lynn before she left the server. The fourth Engineer’s portrait disappeared from the top bar.
No no no, please. Please don’t go. Don’t leave us. I wouldn’t want to be alone here. Now there’s just three of us, and I really hope that number doesn’t go down anymore. When the others were here, this was just a weird TF2 map that we were exploring together as friends. And now it feels like we’re trapped in this infinite world, but we aren’t alone. The only problem is we don’t know what else is here.
I shuddered, imagining Craig and Graham ditching me and leaving me all alone in the Valley of the Sentries. Just me and whoever- no, whatever was talking to us.
“sentry_check_pattern: you don’t know how good you have it
you can leave at any time
i can’t”
This terrified me. What a horrible thought, never being able to leave this place. But of course, no one could really be trapped here. It’s a Team Fortress 2 server. You can just exit the game and shut your computer. No one could be trapped in a video game.
But if you think about it, aren’t the characters themselves trapped? They can’t leave the game. They’re characters. They don’t even know they’re in a game. You or the computer controls all their actions. They don’t have free will. And if you’re bad at the game, they’ll just keep dying over and over again.
Wait, why was I thinking about this?
I carefully considered what I wanted to say next in the chat. Whatever I said could either answer all my burning questions or leave me asking more. But sentry_check_pattern talked first.
“sentry_check_pattern: i was made for one purpose
to die over and over again”
Oh my god. It was like this person read my mind and knew exactly what I was thinking about. Who or what was I talking to? I turned all the way around to make sure that no one else was there. It was just the two blue Engineers standing behind me. Just Graham and Craig. And that man with the checkered skin.
Startled, I asked my friends if they saw what I saw. It took them a second, but both of them confirmed that yes, there was indeed something else there. A basic male model with the same chessboard texture as the map. Graham immediately started to shoot at him. Nothing. It just went straight through him.
“sentry_check_pattern: you can’t kill what’s already been killed millions of times over
valve made that mistake too
every company has that one failed project they don’t talk about
and that’s me”
Whoever was behind this weird account was talking crazy. The Team Fortress 2 developers were very open about everything like fixing their glitches and bugs. They always posted things on the official blog about the development process. They’re so open about their failures and always promise to fix them.
“Stop with the weird stuff. We just wanted to know what the deal is with this server and the weird chess guy. Do you know anything about it?” Graham asked in the text chat.
“sentry_check_pattern: know anything?
you’re not very bright, graham
none of you are
do you not realize where you are and what you’re talking to”
Something about the way sentry_check_pattern used Graham’s name gave me goosebumps. I didn’t know what I was talking to. I didn’t even think I wanted to know at this point.
“sentry_check_pattern: this is one of valve’s test servers
i’m the texture they use to check if the sentries work
read between the lines”
“Quiet, NPC.” Craig said. I laughed a little bit to fight off the awkward tension. Then I reminded myself that I was talking to a video game character, no- not even a character. A blank character model. A texture.
“sentry_check_pattern: just because i’m a character model doesn’t mean i can’t feel pain
open fire”
The sentries all swiveled around to face the man and shot at him. He kept falling to the ground, turning white and standing back up in the same position.
“sentry_check_pattern: cease fire”
All of the sentries stopped shooting and just went back to spinning around, their beeps echoing in the air.
“sentry_check_pattern: ready to see what i’ve been through for over a decade?
open fire”
Before any of us could react, the sentries opened fire on Craig all at once. He kept dying, but he didn’t explode the way you’re supposed to when you die in TF2. He just dropped to the floor, turned white, and respawned over and over again. There was no death scream. I tried to type something else in the chat but the game lagged so much that my typing just ended up as a string of random letters that meant nothing. Craig tried to type something out too. It just ended up as “wwwwwwwwwwthisishowitfeelswwwwwwwww” Then the game crashed and my computer shut down.
I hyperventilated. Then I laughed at myself for hyperventilating over a stupid computer game. It was Team Fortress 2 for god’s sake. That game with all the memes and goofy jokes. Stupid, stupid Sean. Scared of a character model. Jose would never let me live it down. I just laughed and laughed to push the fear away.
I closed my laptop and took out my phone to rewatch all of my favorite TF2 animations for the millionth time. As if they weren’t already the funniest things in the world, I forced myself to laugh even harder than usual. Every time I saw the Engineer, I couldn’t help but look at the reflection in his goggles. The reflection of an endless map of black and white squares.
Thankfully, nothing bad happened to my game, account or laptop. The next day I just went right back to playing and enjoying the rage coming from all the people who ran right into my sentries.
Team Engineer was still a thing, but it was never really the same. We played together a lot less frequently. It was still a lot of fun, but I felt a change that I couldn’t really describe.
We found out that Craig had lost all progress on his TF2 account. Everyone gifted him all his favorite cosmetics and we all pooled our money together to get him a Steam gift card. He video called us, crying at our kindness. It was the first time I ever even saw his face. He was a lot older than most of us. If I had to guess an age, I’d say somewhere around 30. He had black bangs and was wearing a TF2 shirt. His room was dark, only lit by his glowing computer screen. He thanked us repeatedly and even tried to return the gift card, but we were all adamant that he should keep it.
Speaking of Craig, we still kept in touch but he didn’t talk to me as much anymore. Any time I tried to ask him about vl_sentry, he ignored me for a few days.
The other day, I got some postcards from my cousin Matthew. He was very academic and happened to be studying at a private high school about 9 hours away from where I live. All of his postcards were pictures of him making funny faces with all his friends at favorite school activities like robotics, debate team, and chess club.
I looked at the chess club photo closely. Matthew and his friends were standing in front of a chessboard with a mirror on the wall. And for a split second, I could have sworn that the chessboard looked different in the mirror. It looked warped, like it wasn’t a flat board anymore. Like it almost had hills and valleys. No, it couldn’t be. I rubbed my eyes. There, in the mirror was a checkered man. I knew it was there. I swear on my mother’s life that there was another person in that photo. And then it was gone. Maybe the picture was just printed badly. But I had to make sure my eyes were right.
So I brought the postcard to school with me and I showed Jose. I asked him if he saw the checkered man in the mirror. He said no. But that wasn’t the answer I wanted to hear. That was the answer I hoped I wouldn’t hear. I asked him again. He said no again. Then I asked him another time. He said I was being annoying. So I asked another one of my friends. He said no too. So I moved on to yet another friend. He told me to stop.
I angrily clutched the postcard in my hand, crumpling it. I was the only one that saw what was really there. Everyone else was lying to me. They refused to see the truth.
I screamed and ripped up the postcard. I stomped on its pieces. I rubbed them in the dirt for good measure.
Somewhere in the distance, I heard the sound of electronics beeping.
It rang in my ears.
It was weirdly comforting to me.
You can leave the Valley of the Sentries. But the valley will never leave you.

Hello! I'll start talking about myself, then about my boyfriend, then how our relationship went down and how we got back together. Sorry for my English in advance.
So. I'm Brazilian and a 20 year-old Law student. I'm very empathetic, and I came from a family with many challenges - financial and emotional. My parents marriage isn't the best, and I grew up in a pretty hostile environment (in the sense that my parents were very strict about grades, and my father is very aggressive in general). However, they did the best they could with what they had. Last year, I came to live in another state, 7 hours away from home by car, because I got into one of the best colleges in the country (currently second best at Law) and couldn't miss the opportunity. I've been learning how to be an adult more and more day by day. I've got a nice internship and work another job aside from that.
When I thought I was finally free from my mother's controlling behavior, I decided it was finally a good time to date someone. And so I began talking to this boy (at the time, a 22 year old) through the internet. He seemed wonderful. Spent three years in Romania to study (even tho he didn't get to graduate) and then came back to Brazil to pursue his true passion, International Relations. We hit it off pretty quickly and started officially dating after a month.
At that time, even thought he had dated multiple girls in the past, I was his first serious relationship. Even today, he says I'm the only girl he ever felt (and still feels) love for. I got to know later on that he had Bipolarity, depression and Borderline Personality Syndrome - all of those conditions that weren't being treated or medicated for months.
He had problems with money, problems with dates, problems with compromises, problems with his grades, problems with his addictions (cigarettes). He didn't know exactly how to make a girlfriend feel safe, he would often not include me in his routine, sometimes he wasn't careful with his wording... and many other things. Every time I talked about our problems, he would only say "sorry" "I can't guarantee I'll actually change" "maybe I'm not the one you're looking for". He followed a LOT of girls, and always told me "I don't check out Instagram anyways so it's nothing".
Then, after 7 months in the relationship, I went over to my mother's house for Christmas and New year. He also went to his dad's house at that time. We cried a lot when we had to part, because we did absolutely everything together.
Well. Once he got into his dad's house, he began to be more distant (if we chatted for 10 minutes a day, that was rare) and I was exhausted. I just wanted a conversation of some minutes, and I understand he wanted to be with his family, but a nice call at the end of the day or just a few texts wouldn't keep him from them. I talked about that with him and I ended up being the one apologizing for not being understanding.
Phew...
Then, after two weeks of vacation, it happened. A girl going to my DMs and exposing an intimate conversation she and my boyfriend had just a few minutes ago. I exploded. She was Spanish. She wasn't even Brazilian. She was an online friend. He sent messages talking about how he wanted to kiss her on her bed, about how he was horny, asking her for a fit check, and sending pictures of his underwear.
She checked his Instagram later just to find out my name in his bio. So she went over and sent me everything. Every screenshot.
I was betrayed. I never thought he would ever do this to me.
I talked to him. He said he was sorry, that he loved me, that he didn't get why he'd done that, that he was stressed, that he would never do it again, that I was wonderful, that I didn't do anything wrong and he didn't want to lose me...
I'll be honest, at that time, I didn't want to break up. But I HAD to.
So I broke up with him, but told him we could try again if he made an effort, and we should also talk in person about everything. Told him he should seek therapy and a psychiatrist. My condition was that he would tell me if he got together or flirted with another woman until I got back from vacations so we could have that talk.
It didn't take long for him to start telling me he was feeling numb. That he didn't think it was a good idea to get back together. However, he would send me good morning and good night texts every single day, and sometimes he would text me that he loved me. Weeks later, when he stopped texting as much, I found out he was flirting with other girls. So I cut off contact, and told him that I couldn't believe he didn't keep what he promised me (telling me if he flirted with someone else). He hid it from me, and I didn't even understand why.
Days later, I found out he slept with a prostitute, and even told his friends to gang b*ng her. My heart completely stopped. I was heartbroken.
My own depression came out of hiding. So I contacted a therapist, and tried to appreciate the other things in life other than him.
Later on, I came to know he was also working on himself, getting medicated and all.
2 months later, I come back to the state I studied in, where he already was. I come in peace, relaxed, and happy to be in another place full of opportunities. But my heart still weighed.
Then I went to have that talk to him. He apologized for everything. We had a long, long talk about things, and I felt a lot better. But then he started getting physical; hugging me for hours, caressing me, kissing my cheek, kissing my forehead, putting his hand on my thigh...
Before anything could get any more serious, I went back home alone.
Then, another day, he came to get gifts I had gotten for his family (it was his stepmom's birthday, whom I cherished, and on vacations it was his little brother's birthday). I wanted to go to the pharmacy after that, and he asked to accompany me. I accepted, as it was late and I didn't want to go alone.
After sometime, he started talking about how he missed me. How he missed my jokes, my humour, my personality, my presence in his life. He hugged me. I told him it was a bit late for that. That I had given him the chance to have me back, and he didn't appreciate it.
Then we went to talk in a park. We sat together, and he started to tell me even more things. That he would see my clothes and other things in his room and cry, wondering why he'd cheated on me, telling himself he was stupid for letting me go and disrespecting me. He would often miss his way from home and go to my place by mistake. That he'd never stopped loving me, and that he was just running away from conflict l.
Well. I couldn't help it. I missed him like hell and he told me everything I wanted to hear. I ended up kissing him.
We then got back together oficially after three months of going out and sorting things out. He's been wonderful, everything I asked for and more.
But it still hurts, as you might think.
Most of the times I feel insecure he comes running over to my place to make sure I'm not breaking up with him again.
He knows I know about the prostitute, btw.
I just don't get it. He says he regrets it, that he regretted before and after. Well, if he regretted before, he could have just not done it. I didn't get anything... I still couldn't accept why he'd done everything. I felt ugly, I felt like I was not enough...
Then he told me about his past with childhood trauma, which explained a lot to me in my head. I cried when he told me his story, and apologized for what they've done to him, because the person who did bad things to him him was his family and never apologized. He'd never told this story to anyone.
That alone explained a lot of things in my head. His hypersexuality, his tendency to deal with things alone, etc. But the prostitute thing still gets to me.
I keep wondering what she'd looked like. How was it. If he liked it. Why he'd done it.
He says he did it because he just wanted to forget everything, but it just didn't work. That he's here for me now, that he'll never do such thing again, that he'll be good to me from now on...
Idk what to do. I want to stop thinking about her, but idk how.

I reluctantly started babysitting 2 children in my home and I told the mother I was hesitant about starting because I wasn’t sure that I’d have everything I need to take care of them or how good I was with kids since my experience is limited to just my own children
She assured me she would make sure they had what they needed and so far she does make sure the infant has diapers and formula, there’s been days I ran out of baby water and I just boiled or like today she didn’t sent wipes so I had to open a pack of my own that I had for home/travel use.
We talked about her sending food like fruit/bread/snacks because the mother said she would and she has only done that once out of the several months I’ve been doing this I’m feeding the toddler everyday she goes through fruit and snacks like crazy
The payment arrangement hasn’t been what we discussed, she pays me less than we agreed on but I haven’t said anything
In the first day I started, I noticed something abnormal on their skin, told the mom after noticing for a couple days and getting worse and she said she just noticed that after picking them up from my house one day and she took them to the dr and they were given antifungal medicine but I just didn’t like the way she commented on it like it happened after dropping them off. I should have said something the first day but it was small and on the back of the infants neck so I forgot plus it did cross my mind that the mom probably had already known. I think I did mention that I applied a small amount of diaper cream to the area
She only sent a bouncer with the infant and told me that it was fine to keep the newborn in the car seat or the bouncer for sleep and I didn’t approve of that sleeping situation because the risk of asphyxiation so the only thing I had was an old, firm pack n play insert mattress that I lay on the floor and the baby sleeps there with close supervision.
The toddler started off napping on my bed but my bed appears to be too high and the toddler almost fell off one day so I started making a comfy lil pallet in the floor and laying them down there but they won’t nap and will constantly get back up and be fussy until they nap. I took a large blanket and ripped an end at the top and a piece at the bottom and I wrap the toddler up in the blanket and use the little ripped ends to wrap around her again and then to secure this little bundle around them and it keeps them from getting up when I lay them down.
I made a post about this recently and commenters were pretty harsh as I had an odd choice of wording but i see what I’m doing for nap times as my next best available option. I’m on the market for a free pack n play and after commenters fussed at me for how the toddlers nap time arrangements were, I reached out to the mom the next time she dropped off
Which i actually didn’t hear from her over the weekend and didn’t see them the first day of the week when i normally would and i got paranoid but it turned out she just stayed home because the toddler got into their edibles
and I asked would she be willing to help me find a pack n play or buy one so that I don’t have to continue wrapping her toddler in a burrito to keep her from getting out of their sleeping pallet when it’s nap time. I showed her pictures of the baby burrito both awake and asleep to show her that the toddler isn’t fussing about being put into a burrito the entire time. I told her they show signs of discontentment when I first tell them it’s time to go nap and when I get them to lay on the blanket for me to wrap them in. By that I mean, i see them make a disgruntled facial expression and they may grunt about it and whine slightly but once wrapped, the toddler goes right on to sleep. Once the toddler wakes up they can even manage to wriggle out of it
The mother looked at the toddler burrito I invented and laughed and said that she didn’t care if I continue sleeping arrangements that way as long as I’m continuing to monitor them and check periodically for signs of life (breathing) which is completely normal as a mom to check for in any sleeping baby or toddler regardless of sleeping arrangement.
I explained my reasoning to the mom and she was in a rush to go to work so she really brushed it off and said she understands I’m making do with what I have the best I know how. I think that affirmed to me that what I was doing was with good intentions but I told her I would still be trying to get a pack n play because obviously I would prefer their sleeping arrangements to be as safe as possible. She looked at me funny and said in all honesty she has no intention of buying one or picking one up off the curb if she saw one for free because what I’m doing works fine. So I kind of didn’t know what to say but I’m still gonna look for one.

Received my batch 15 Framework 16 on Tuesday. Some initial thoughts after setting it up and using it for a few hours to get Debian up and running:
Build quality is higher than I expected. It really doesn't feel like a product made by a small startup. I was prepared for various small issues issues after reading a lot of posts about the laptop, but my experience has been great. I didn't have any issues with the SSD screw or the spacers, and I don't seem to have the issue where the bezel is pressing on the screen. Screen flex isn't too bad either.
Installed 48 GB RAM (2 x 24GB) and memory training during the initial boot took around 30 seconds. Works well.
The keyboard does flex a bit but it's nowhere near as bad as in some of the initial reviews. They must have done something to improve this. The keyboard itself is good - better than the Dell my wife uses for work, but not quite as good as the Lenovo I use for work. Love the RGB.
I installed the latest daily snapshot of Debian testing, which has Linux kernel 6.7 that contains Framework's and AMD's bug fixes. Everything seems to work out-of-the-box, even the wifi, apart from having to manually install fprintd and libpam-fprintd for the fingerprint reader to work. KDE defaulted to 150% scaling, which is a nice size (Windows also defaults to 150%).
The keyboard does get a little warmer than my work laptop (Lenovo X1 Extreme Gen 5) even though the Lenovo runs hotter temperatures overall. Maybe just a difference in cooling design. It doesn't really bother me.
Overall, I'm really impressed. What a great device.
One weird thing was that the bezel was very dusty right out of the box? Not sure if it was dust, but there was some sort of dirty specs all over it. A bit strange since everything else was clean. I just wiped it down before installing it.

Their wings were not clipped. I quickly realizing they’re not inside house and just ….? I don’t think I’ve really processed the fact that they’re gone. I’m just numb. Tears do start streaming down my face when I look at their pictures, but I am not feeling anything.
Anyway, I don’t know why but I just don’t see anything working to get them back. Like they can fly very well, who’s to say they’re somewhere around (we went to check). Even if they were, how will we ever catch them? They were not 100% domesticated so they will fly away if you try.
Reading stories in this subreddit that their escaped lovebird was found a day after, 1 week after or even 8 months (?) is just .. I just don’t understand how that’s even possible to be so lucky.
Any advice on like what to do? Like how do I navigate this whole thing? How did you deal with the pain of losing two dear pets that improved my life immensely the last four years and made me happy every fucking time I would see them. I was truly obsessed. I would constantly stop whatever I’m doing just take a moment and look at them. They were soooooo cute and funny.
Any advice on how to approach this situation? Keep looking for them even though it just feels so delusional? Online I did share pictures of my birds. How do I deal with the idea that they probably won’t survive the wild, and that it was my fault that their life is cut short? Any other stuff that I should take into account? :(

pics/vid/verification
First up is a Sailor Pro gear, 21K medium nib ala SPG (me!)- it is made from Sailor Jade + Ocean Water. I rate it B/C condition (minor ink residue in cap/section)- will include new converter- $225 shipped obo
Next is the elusive original Twsbi Eco Turquoise. I rate this in B condition. It has a fine nib and will include a new barrel though the original one is in good condition. I'd like to see what I paid for this- $100 shipped.
I also have the adorable Kaweco Sport Iridescent Pear- B condition- Medium nib with the cute converter included- $25 shipped or $20 as an add on.
Next are two A5 hobonichi notebooks with Tomoe River Paper- $17 each or $30 shipped for both.
I also have a keyboard that I am selling on another platform- a custom made one- bamboo case, NK Milkshake keycaps, and dang keebs cookies and cream switches, $115 obo if anyone here is interested!
Thanks! As always, please comment + PM with questions/interest.