Poem mother passed away

Dear, the guy who might be the one for me for eternity. I just feel like now is a time for me to write this because there is no other ways to feel better if I keep it in.
I'm 20 years old, I've been single my whole life. There has been a guy I thought was the one for me, but turns out they were not. Now they ran off happily with some other girl. Leaving me breathless and heart broken. Being single for 20 years has been okay, and peaceful. I enjoy being single, but then again I feel also that there are times where I love myself enough and know my standards, I can't seem to help but feel that I want to have a man, the one that will hold my heart gentle. Someone I can go to, EVERYTIME, to cry on and lean on when I'm in desperate need of comfort. I want to feel that love with a man that I read in my books and see in movies. I know there are guys like that out there, and they got their woman just to make them live in that reality. I wish someone could do that for me. Why I plan to write this now? Well, I met a girl not so long ago. She and I share the same interest of reading books. We talked for almost 2 hours until we had to leave to sleep and wake up for the next morning. She told me she was going to the beach the next day with her friends, and I was happy for her. I love beaches but it's not often I go there because where I live, the weather gets quickly cold. But even if a day comes where it's so hot. I can't even afford to get there. I will get my driver license soon and plan on doing so much with a car for the sake of enjoying even if it's little by little. Anyhow, she tells me a moment later that there was a guy and his friends at the beach joining her and her friends playing volleyball. And this certain guy has been eyeing her for a long time. This is where the feeling started, the feeling of ''Wow, she's so lucky'', ''I wish that could happen to me.'' or, ''Why can't that be me, too?''. She explains to me about the guy like a whole romance book started, and there, in the moment, I didn't feel jealous, nor hard feelings on her because she experiencing something all girls who have been single for too long wants it too. I just felt, too happy for her, too happy for her I felt more lonely inside even if i got my soulmate friends. It's just those feelings that pass by but will eventually go away, but will come back naturally and what do I do with it? Just vent it out to myself, anyone, stranger, or a friend. In truth, I'm really tired of how this society of men are going forward. I'm so tired I wonder sometimes if it's even possible. I've interacted with so many guys in my life, it may be hard to believe but really I am speechless how guys are these days. Talking to 30 men, not flirting with all of them at the same time, but just one by one that comes and goes. Not even one, not a single one was never gentle in love. It was rather quick and fast. It makes me wonder where has the slow and gentle love gone? Where is it? Where are you? Where are you in this twisted world that can really love me in a way that feels really love? Home and warm. Safe and comfort. I find it stupid that I come here now writing all this. I'm not sure what I'm trying to gain from here. Maybe I just want someone to truly relate to me. Someone that can speak to my heart in a correct way I'd been wanting someone to do.
So, dear future soulmate, There is so much love I have in me that I truly wanna share with you, even if you're not next to me, not even close, yet further away. I still wait, maybe look for you somewhere and hoping you'd find me. There are many ways I want to say than just ''I love you'', but I want to let you know this way: I've been waiting for you my whole life, for you to be the one and last until i share my last breath. My heart yearns for you in the morning until evening. Every time I look at the sun and feel the warm in my body. I think of you, I think of how you make me feel safe in every way that makes me more in love with you. You truly are magnificent that I could never turn away from the sun you are to me. I'm truly stupid to write this for nobody, but I just want to make my heart heard, I want my heart to feel known by you. If I can hold your heart for one day and more, please let me do it for infinity. I want to give you my heart because that's how much I'd be in love with you, and never give it back to me because you're my reality i've been wanting in my dreams. You are every bit if existence that puts my world on fire in the most extraordinary way. If I could yell out what love feels like, i'd say your name out loud and proud. Knowing that, having you, I can feel like I can do anything because I know, from heart and soul, you'd support me in every way. I love you to an extend that stop loving you feels like an endgame for me. I want to grow old with you and have beautiful kids with you. Finally, I want to know what loves feels like with you. If you are out there. Your most long lost soulmate, A

Oliver goes to West Virginia, throws away a mother's frozen meals, buries her deep fryer in the yard, berates a lunch lady for what they serve, and has a doctor tell parents, in front of their kid, that their kid might have diabetes and get amputations and die at 30. (They had not done any tests yet). It ended with a free Rascall Flats concert and an $80,000 check for the county from US Foods. After that, some Appalachian school kids stopped eating school lunches, which led to cafeteria worker layoffs.

She got up in the dark, with only the dim ambience of soft blue lighting to accompany her. She stretched all four arms, her two legs, and rolled her neck. It struck her as mildly interesting in that moment, how something so small could connect them to humans, The thought was fleeting as she took another step forward to kneel down on the floor. There, in a little alcove in the wall, she had set a volcanic rock from Anin, dried moss, and other paraphernalia from her home world. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath resting her hands together.
Praise and respect to the spirits of Anin. Praise the fathers and mothers of war gone to their rest below the moss and the earth. Praise their spirits that watch from the sky and peer through the ether down upon us.
She continued the slow mantra in the style of Prayer learned from Naktan and pulled her concentration to her core, ignoring anything and everything around her. A deep state of meditation overtook her. She would never have done this if she thought there were any chance that she was in danger, but below she knew Earth glowed like a sphere before their orbiting ship. There was no worry of invasion.
She thought she heard something at one point, but chose to ignore it as she continued her mantra.
Eventually, and after an unknown amount of minutes, she stood and turned slowly to find-
She stopped, and crossed her arms over her chest.
"What are you doing?”
Adam burrowed his way further down into her blankets, nuzzling his head up against her pillow,
"So warm, and comfy!"
She tried not to smile,
"You dumbass."
He pulled the blankets tighter around himself,
"You know, I did come here to talk to you, but now I actually am really comfortable, so come back in two hours."
"I- This is MY home!"
He closed his eyes and pretended to snore loudly.
She rolled her eyes as she watched him theatrically pretend to sleep. She looked around mildly for a moment, before picking up another pillow and glancing at the door. She casually walked over, dropped the pillow on his head and then held it down as if she intended to smother him.
”Die human scum!”
That got him up and moving.
Before long the two of them were grappling for the upper hand, him trying to put her in a choke hold, and her using her lower arms to pinch him.
He yelped,
"Ouch! Pinching is illegal!”
"Sissy."
He clamped his legs around her lower arms, pinning them in place.
She struggled for a minute and then went limp.
She could feel his smug smile,
"I win, I beat the saint of Anin. Everyone bow at my feet."
"You say that, but if this were a real fight, since you’re a human male, you're the one with a self-destruct button."
"Self-destruct button...?"
"Meaning if this were a real fight, I would have punched you in the balls."
"Yaoooutch… Oh god… Please don't."
Finally, he let her go, leaving the two of them to lay on her bed, sheets scattered on the floor around them, and her pillows in disarray. Adam put his hands behind his head and sighed.
She glanced over at him,
"I don't suppose you came to just hang out. Here on Admiral-ly business?"
He groaned, pulling one of her pillows over his face,
"Please smother me for real this time."
She leaned up on one of her elbows,
"Why?"
"I don't wanna be an adult anymore!"
She tilted her head to the side, watching in amusement as he attempted to throw a childlike tantrum, but only really had the energy to kick his feet once,
"It's boring and lame and they won’t let me wear heelies to important meetings... also children don't have to pay taxes."
She laughed, pulling the pillow from his face,
"Adam you are many things, but 'adult' is not one of them."
He grinned slightly,
"True enough."
He sighed again and rested his head back against the pillows,
"I just want to get back to what we are supposed to be doing, exploring the universe and making cool alien friends."
He threw up his hands in frustration,
"But suddenly I find myself embroiled in stupid annoying politics that I don't understand, being used by people who are, let’s face it, WAY smarter than me, constantly finding myself getting manipulated."
She huffed,
"They aren't smarter than you Adam, they're just manipulative, and you aren't."
He sighed,
"Fair enough."
Then he looked at her, bright green eyes reflecting the soft ambient blue light,
"I just, I miss this, I miss us, I miss hanging out and doing stupid shit, and all of the things I could do when I wasn't so important and this operation was smaller."
She smiled rather sadly reaching one hand over for his, lacing the four of her fingers through the five of his,
"Well someone has to do the hard things, who better than you?”
He glanced over at her, raising an eyebrow,
"Or you, miss saint?”
She rolled her eyes again,
"Can't seem to get you off of that. I'm still the same person I used to be."
"But with power."
She elbowed him gently and he grinned,
"But really, I am proud and impressed and... Let's be honest super super smug that 'I' know you personally."
"I know, I am pretty terrific."
The two of them laughed for a minute before settling down again. He glanced over to her little shrine on the wall,
"What were you doing just then?"
She looked up at the ceiling, following the lines of metal and rivets with her eyes,
"Praying to the spirits of Anin."
Embarrassed, he shifted,
"I didn't know you were... Well I didn't think you were all that religious?"
She shrugged,
"Don't feel bad, it's sort of a new thing. Back before all this, it was sort of just stories to me. Like I believed it because that was what everyone believed, but I didn't really accept it, or feel it the way I do now. After everything with my mother, it was hard to feel connected to something I felt I wasn't a part of... But then after visiting my mother, after becoming a saint for a religion I never really followed... Well, it started to make more sense. It feels real now in a way that it never did."
She turned to look at him, finding him watching her, the UV blue stripes in his skin glowing blue.
"I believe in the spirits of Anin more than I ever have."
He smiled at her and squeezed her hand,
"I'm glad to hear it."
They lapsed into silence for a long moment, staring up at the ceiling before, inevitably he broke it,
"So this makes you like, space Moses right?”
She frowned and turned to look at him,
"What is a “Moses”?"
He grinned,
"A guy from one of the Earth Religions. You know, guy follows god's directions to lead his people away from slavery, climbs a mountain, receives the word of god, comes down to give it to the people, that sort of thing."
Sunny tilted her head slightly to the side,
"Are you religious?"
He paused, frowning,
"I... well I... don't really know. My family has been some flavor of Christian for a long time."
"Christian?"
"Uh yeah, the general idea is that there is one all-powerful deity who created everything. He has rules and laws that you are supposed to follow, the general tenants of this specific religion mostly boil down to: love everyone and don't be a dick, which humans are notoriously bad at. You sin you go to hell, a very bad place after you die, and if you are a good person you go to heaven. Problem is everyone is a sinner and breaks the rules, so really no one was going to get into heaven."
"That sounds bleak..."
"Well, that's where the other stuff comes in. Basically, this all-powerful deity sent down his son in human form to live a perfect life, so when he was martyred he took on the sins of all of humanity and paid for them in the greatest act of mercy to open the gate for the rest of us into heaven."
Sunny shifted as he tilted to the side to lay in the crook of her arms,
"Of course that is just one religion among tons on earth, we aren't really as cohesive in our beliefs as Drev are... As for me... I'm not really sure."
She tilted her head to the side, cheek resting against his hair,
"After seeing space, I become more and more convinced of some... Thing that created everything, but beyond that it's sort of a tossup."
She ran one hand through his hair, coarse but still soft somehow.
"You know my name comes from that religion?”
She turned her head to look at him,
"Oh, really?”
"Adam was the first man."
"What do you mean!?”
Adam shrugged,
"He was supposedly the first man that god created, from the dust of the earth... I think?"
She gave him a sidelong glance,
"Look, and you get to be the first idiot in space."
He snorted and poked her in the ribs.
"There were PLENTY of idiots in space before me, believe you me."
"Mmm I don't know, you are pretty dumb."
He laughed, grabbing a pillow and hitting her with it. She rolled over so she was lying on top of him and then went limp.
He struggled,
"Get your big ass off me."
"Oh no, I have been attacked by a sudden acute case of the “my spine doesn't work anymore”-disease."
"If you don't move, you'll suddenly find yourself with a case of “fist in your face”-disease."
She laughed and rolled off him, making sure the hard parts of her carapace were sticking down for maximum discomfort.
He grunted.
They returned to lying down next to each other in the half darkness. Sunny reached over and turned on some quiet music in the background as the two of them sat and talked, and laughed.
"I can't wait to get back to deep space."
He closed his eyes and hummed softly at the thought,
"Just the crew and the darkness and nothing ahead of us but an endless frontier."
Surprisingly, she found the thought to be more than a little comforting, and closed her eyes thinking about the vast reaches of blackness and the endless spinning galaxies.
"And while we are out, we can drop Conn into a pulsar."
He snorted,
“Why? Well first of for scientific reasons! If a marshmallow causes a nuclear blast, I wonder what dropping Conn would do… but at least he’d be dead.”
"That billowy bastard would survive and you know it."
She huffed,
"Still though, if I have to hear one more smug lecture how he has a child with you, I'm gonna wring his scrawny neck."
He grinned teeth flashing blue in the light,
"Is someone... Jealous?"
Sunny laughed, almost tipping him off the bed and onto the floor with her mirth,
"Yes Adam, I am totally jealous, really I am, ‘kay?. I mean who wouldn't want to have a child with YOU, big dumb, dork. Really the perfect place to put my superior genes."
"Superior genes, says someone who can't reach the top shelf."
She kicked him, foot clanging off his prosthetic,
"I am a foot taller than you."
He placed his hand next to his ear,
"What was that, I can't hear you over how short you are."
Sunny shook her head,
"At least I have binocular vision and both my knees."
"So we are gonna ignore that that binocular vision is due to a prosthetic now after the whole “your mom” incident? And also, veeery important: weird neck nostrils, don't forget about those!"
"Oh yes, so I can’t house them on my face like you and your bigass nose."
"Low blow, low blow."
"There are... Lower things... I could make fun of."
He snorted,
"Can't make fun of it if you've never seen it. You on the other hand, walking around in the nude..."
"You're welcome. Who wouldn't love…"
She gestured to herself,
"This."
"Mmm yeah... chitin, very sexy."
"I am a gift to the universe, and should be appreciated by everyone."
He brushed a hand through his hair,
"Well I find that real gifts are gift wrapped, so jot that down."
"Oh yeah, like a prank gift when you put something lame in a box for something cool."
He frowned at her,
"You wound me. My feelings are so very very hurt. I might even cry."
"I drink human tears."
"That… that's really gross.'
She laughed and then they lapsed into silence. She could hear him breathing quietly next to her in the darkness, his chest rising and falling under the ambient blue light. She looked across the room to where her saint armor was hanging in its climate-controlled case illuminated to a pearly sheen.
"Adam?"
"Yeah?”
"You know I'm just kidding about calling you dumb right?"
"Yeah I know."
"I'm proud of what you've been doing."
Adam turned to look at her rather incredulous,
"Me, of what? I haven't been doing shit."
"So, we are just going to ignore you overthrowing a maniacal politician while simultaneously piloting a 2,000 year old spacecraft?"
"That was more Conn and Eris than it was me."
"It was your idea."
"Let’s not forget Admiral Kelly."
Sunny pulled him closer,
"I am sorry, I will not be accepting anything other than you acknowledging that you did a good job."
"Screw you!”
"You'd like that wouldn't you?”
He sighed,
"You've been talking to Ramirez WAY too much."
She was only slightly smug as she rested her head back against the pillow,
"I really should get up and train..."
"We should yeah..."
Neither of them moved.
"Alternatively, we could just... Lay here... All day and do... nothing."
She looked up at the ceiling for a long moment and pretended to be in deep contemplation before…
"Well it's official, you have convinced me. You and your silver tongue."
"I am a master negotiator."
He shifted position putting one arm behind his head,
"Think about it, by this time tomorrow we will be back to space exploring and doing what we should have been doing all along. I can't wait."
"That makes two of us."
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I suspect my sister is narcissistic with enabling parents. I was considering going no-contact with my family minus a brother I’m close to 3 years ago and was almost out until my father died in a freak accident and I got roped back in. My sister has spent the last 30 years making my life a living hell and my parents never stuck up for me or protected me from her. My mother, now alone, is terrified of her. We had a shitty childhood and all have different survival tactics, but after going to therapy for four years now, I’ve gotten away from those and surround myself with happy, healthy, amazing, supportive people. In regard to family, I keep my distance when I can (living 3.5 hours away helps), but often am the one everyone turns to when shit goes sideways to fix everything, calm people down, figure out what to do next. I’m tired of it, especially now realizing no one does the same for me.
I recently got married and had a 40 person head count, with 38 yeses. After a bunch of random crap, 13 of my 20 invitees flaked 3 days to 2 hours before the party, all of which were very, very close family members including a brother and two of my BILs. Had I known this, with ample timing, I would have invited more friends who WOULD have shown, but due to family taking up so much of the headcount, I couldn’t extend invites to them all. I vented to my mother who said at least I have my sister coming, who I said was only invited since the others were and she has never been nice to me or my husband - which my mother agreed with and said was a self-centered survival thing. I said she should learn a little kindness which would get her far. She despises my husband, who is genuinely as nice as can be, even to a fault. Doesn’t have a bad bone in his body, god bless him. But he supports me and loves me and we do well off each other and thrive, which she doesn’t like. Other siblings have commented on the fact she treats him so poorly when he is nothing but so kind to her.
Come party, 2 hours in and she’s nowhere to be seen. We’re waiting around to cut cakes since her household consisted of 5 people and we didn’t want to have people randomly walk in on it and ruin the photographs, miss the momentous moment, etc. My brother gets in touch with her and relays the message that I’m a monster, I’m childish and horrible and never welcome her to anything and I’m irrelevant and no one likes me which is why everyone bailed on me and I should be embarrassed. The only person I said those things to was my mother (who couldn’t come to party due to health reasons). I spent a majority of my wedding party crying on a fire escape because I was so upset by her words, so upset that everyone bailed, and so upset I didn’t follow my gut inviting other friends who would have come over obligatory family invites. I blocked my sister and her friend who joined in on her meanness. She has taken to emailing and texting me under spoof emails and phone numbers. Calling me irrelevant, embarrassing, disgusting, ugly, childish, greedy, no one showed up because they don’t like me, never been liked, etc.
My mother has spoken to her, but hasn’t reached out to me since the party when I said I was hurt at what she shared in confidence and need to think about what I want from this family anymore. My mother swears she went through her phone and saw the messages, but other parts of her (mothers) story don’t align. My mother historically has victim mindset over everything and could do no wrong.
I’m hurt, I’m upset. My husband has been amazing, but he doesn’t have any family that we could lean on ever. I’m torn between going fully no contact between my siblings who enable my sister, my mother who is emotionally abusive and enables her and doesn’t protect the rest of us, and calling it a day. Or going no contact with siblings, low contact with my mother, and never returning until they get their shit together and go to therapy. I just don’t know what is best anymore since I know my mom will never stand up to her. Family is all I’ve ever really had outside a close knit group of 3 friends, so it’s hard to go from everything to nothing in the blink of an eye.
Ever since my dad died and my sister took over, I have felt like I don’t have a spot in the family anymore. My sisters best friend of 15 years has always wanted to be apart of our big family since she had a dysfunctional one herself, and joins us on family vacations, Christmas, every waking moment. She is just as bad as my sister, and my sister is her only friend so she bows down to her. Since dad died, it’s like my sister and her friend don’t want me in the family and want to give the bff my daughter spot and to ostracize me. All of this is making me spiral and spiral and spiral. I haven’t been this bad mentally in a really, REALLY long time and it’s triggering me a lot.
I feel like as a woman, I’m held to a different caliber than the others. My brothers could do whatever they damn well please, and they do, and everyone turns a blind eye. With my sister being the oldest, she gets the same treatment. I am overwhelmed with what this family puts me through. My husband doesn’t have any family anymore for us to lean on, spend holidays with, etc. How do you move on? How do you find peace? How do you be okay with the fact nothing will ever change in this dynamic so it’s all or nothing?
FWIW - have an amazing therapist, amazing support group. Am ok, just sad and upset.

I (15 FTM) am in a ongoing battle with my dad (40M) and Step mum(52F), context: My dad is a very hot headed person, yelling, screaming and insulting is a normal thing from him. Both me and my step mum have to deal with this but I get the most of it. My step mum insults me and degrades me all the time, calling me names, using me as a slave and being extremely transphobic. My mum is out the window as she was abusive and lives over an hour away. I have no other family where I live and I can't stay with friends.
I told my step mum in passing conversation that I plan to move out when I graduate high school for university. She lost her crap and said that I never loved her or my dad and I'm an ungrateful brat. I ignored it but it keeps coming up, her and dad will say comments or say I could do online which I don't want to do and have said many times. They keep bringing it up and I'm starting to think maybe I am an asshole but I'm not sure, I would love some advice or support thank you.
Extra context: they are extremely strict and control all my devices, bank account, clothes, hobbies, where I am, what I do, what I eat etc. I will try to answer any questions in the comments, thank you.

FYI, this is a story COLLECTION. Lots of standalones technically. So, you can basically start to read at any chapter, no pre-read of the other chapters needed technically (other than maybe getting better descriptions of characters than: Adam Vir=human, Krill=antlike alien, Sunny=tall alien, Conn=telepathic alien). The numbers are (mostly) only for organization of posts and continuity.
OC Written by Charlie Stastarrfallknightrise,
Typed up and then posted here by me.
Proofreading and language check for some chapters by u/Finbar9800 u/BakeGullible9975 u/Didnotseemecomein and u/medium_jock
Future Lore and fact check done by me.
Awwwww! So cute!
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She got up in the dark, with only the dim ambience of soft blue lighting to accompany her. She stretched all four arms, her two legs, and rolled her neck. It struck her as mildly interesting in that moment, how something so small could connect them to humans, The thought was fleeting as she took another step forward to kneel down on the floor. There, in a little alcove in the wall, she had set a volcanic rock from Anin, dried moss, and other paraphernalia from her home world. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath resting her hands together.
Praise and respect to the spirits of Anin. Praise the fathers and mothers of war gone to their rest below the moss and the earth. Praise their spirits that watch from the sky and peer through the ether down upon us.
She continued the slow mantra in the style of Prayer learned from Naktan and pulled her concentration to her core, ignoring anything and everything around her. A deep state of meditation overtook her. She would never have done this if she thought there were any chance that she was in danger, but below she knew Earth glowed like a sphere before their orbiting ship. There was no worry of invasion.
She thought she heard something at one point, but chose to ignore it as she continued her mantra.
Eventually, and after an unknown amount of minutes, she stood and turned slowly to find-
She stopped, and crossed her arms over her chest.
"What are you doing?”
Adam burrowed his way further down into her blankets, nuzzling his head up against her pillow,
"So warm, and comfy!"
She tried not to smile,
"You dumbass."
He pulled the blankets tighter around himself,
"You know, I did come here to talk to you, but now I actually am really comfortable, so come back in two hours."
"I- This is MY home!"
He closed his eyes and pretended to snore loudly.
She rolled her eyes as she watched him theatrically pretend to sleep. She looked around mildly for a moment, before picking up another pillow and glancing at the door. She casually walked over, dropped the pillow on his head and then held it down as if she intended to smother him.
”Die human scum!”
That got him up and moving.
Before long the two of them were grappling for the upper hand, him trying to put her in a choke hold, and her using her lower arms to pinch him.
He yelped,
"Ouch! Pinching is illegal!”
"Sissy."
He clamped his legs around her lower arms, pinning them in place.
She struggled for a minute and then went limp.
She could feel his smug smile,
"I win, I beat the saint of Anin. Everyone bow at my feet."
"You say that, but if this were a real fight, since you’re a human male, you're the one with a self-destruct button."
"Self-destruct button...?"
"Meaning if this were a real fight, I would have punched you in the balls."
"Yaoooutch… Oh god… Please don't."
Finally, he let her go, leaving the two of them to lay on her bed, sheets scattered on the floor around them, and her pillows in disarray. Adam put his hands behind his head and sighed.
She glanced over at him,
"I don't suppose you came to just hang out. Here on Admiral-ly business?"
He groaned, pulling one of her pillows over his face,
"Please smother me for real this time."
She leaned up on one of her elbows,
"Why?"
"I don't wanna be an adult anymore!"
She tilted her head to the side, watching in amusement as he attempted to throw a childlike tantrum, but only really had the energy to kick his feet once,
"It's boring and lame and they won’t let me wear heelies to important meetings... also children don't have to pay taxes."
She laughed, pulling the pillow from his face,
"Adam you are many things, but 'adult' is not one of them."
He grinned slightly,
"True enough."
He sighed again and rested his head back against the pillows,
"I just want to get back to what we are supposed to be doing, exploring the universe and making cool alien friends."
He threw up his hands in frustration,
"But suddenly I find myself embroiled in stupid annoying politics that I don't understand, being used by people who are, let’s face it, WAY smarter than me, constantly finding myself getting manipulated."
She huffed,
"They aren't smarter than you Adam, they're just manipulative, and you aren't."
He sighed,
"Fair enough."
Then he looked at her, bright green eyes reflecting the soft ambient blue light,
"I just, I miss this, I miss us, I miss hanging out and doing stupid shit, and all of the things I could do when I wasn't so important and this operation was smaller."
She smiled rather sadly reaching one hand over for his, lacing the four of her fingers through the five of his,
"Well someone has to do the hard things, who better than you?”
He glanced over at her, raising an eyebrow,
"Or you, miss saint?”
She rolled her eyes again,
"Can't seem to get you off of that. I'm still the same person I used to be."
"But with power."
She elbowed him gently and he grinned,
"But really, I am proud and impressed and... Let's be honest super super smug that 'I' know you personally."
"I know, I am pretty terrific."
The two of them laughed for a minute before settling down again. He glanced over to her little shrine on the wall,
"What were you doing just then?"
She looked up at the ceiling, following the lines of metal and rivets with her eyes,
"Praying to the spirits of Anin."
Embarrassed, he shifted,
"I didn't know you were... Well I didn't think you were all that religious?"
She shrugged,
"Don't feel bad, it's sort of a new thing. Back before all this, it was sort of just stories to me. Like I believed it because that was what everyone believed, but I didn't really accept it, or feel it the way I do now. After everything with my mother, it was hard to feel connected to something I felt I wasn't a part of... But then after visiting my mother, after becoming a saint for a religion I never really followed... Well, it started to make more sense. It feels real now in a way that it never did."
She turned to look at him, finding him watching her, the UV blue stripes in his skin glowing blue.
"I believe in the spirits of Anin more than I ever have."
He smiled at her and squeezed her hand,
"I'm glad to hear it."
They lapsed into silence for a long moment, staring up at the ceiling before, inevitably he broke it,
"So this makes you like, space Moses right?”
She frowned and turned to look at him,
"What is a “Moses”?"
He grinned,
"A guy from one of the Earth Religions. You know, guy follows god's directions to lead his people away from slavery, climbs a mountain, receives the word of god, comes down to give it to the people, that sort of thing."
Sunny tilted her head slightly to the side,
"Are you religious?"
He paused, frowning,
"I... well I... don't really know. My family has been some flavor of Christian for a long time."
"Christian?"
"Uh yeah, the general idea is that there is one all-powerful deity who created everything. He has rules and laws that you are supposed to follow, the general tenants of this specific religion mostly boil down to: love everyone and don't be a dick, which humans are notoriously bad at. You sin you go to hell, a very bad place after you die, and if you are a good person you go to heaven. Problem is everyone is a sinner and breaks the rules, so really no one was going to get into heaven."
"That sounds bleak..."
"Well, that's where the other stuff comes in. Basically, this all-powerful deity sent down his son in human form to live a perfect life, so when he was martyred he took on the sins of all of humanity and paid for them in the greatest act of mercy to open the gate for the rest of us into heaven."
Sunny shifted as he tilted to the side to lay in the crook of her arms,
"Of course that is just one religion among tons on earth, we aren't really as cohesive in our beliefs as Drev are... As for me... I'm not really sure."
She tilted her head to the side, cheek resting against his hair,
"After seeing space, I become more and more convinced of some... Thing that created everything, but beyond that it's sort of a tossup."
She ran one hand through his hair, coarse but still soft somehow.
"You know my name comes from that religion?”
She turned her head to look at him,
"Oh, really?”
"Adam was the first man."
"What do you mean!?”
Adam shrugged,
"He was supposedly the first man that god created, from the dust of the earth... I think?"
She gave him a sidelong glance,
"Look, and you get to be the first idiot in space."
He snorted and poked her in the ribs.
"There were PLENTY of idiots in space before me, believe you me."
"Mmm I don't know, you are pretty dumb."
He laughed, grabbing a pillow and hitting her with it. She rolled over so she was lying on top of him and then went limp.
He struggled,
"Get your big ass off me."
"Oh no, I have been attacked by a sudden acute case of the “my spine doesn't work anymore”-disease."
"If you don't move, you'll suddenly find yourself with a case of “fist in your face”-disease."
She laughed and rolled off him, making sure the hard parts of her carapace were sticking down for maximum discomfort.
He grunted.
They returned to lying down next to each other in the half darkness. Sunny reached over and turned on some quiet music in the background as the two of them sat and talked, and laughed.
"I can't wait to get back to deep space."
He closed his eyes and hummed softly at the thought,
"Just the crew and the darkness and nothing ahead of us but an endless frontier."
Surprisingly, she found the thought to be more than a little comforting, and closed her eyes thinking about the vast reaches of blackness and the endless spinning galaxies.
"And while we are out, we can drop Conn into a pulsar."
He snorted,
“Why? Well first of for scientific reasons! If a marshmallow causes a nuclear blast, I wonder what dropping Conn would do… but at least he’d be dead.”
"That billowy bastard would survive and you know it."
She huffed,
"Still though, if I have to hear one more smug lecture how he has a child with you, I'm gonna wring his scrawny neck."
He grinned teeth flashing blue in the light,
"Is someone... Jealous?"
Sunny laughed, almost tipping him off the bed and onto the floor with her mirth,
"Yes Adam, I am totally jealous, really I am, ‘kay?. I mean who wouldn't want to have a child with YOU, big dumb, dork. Really the perfect place to put my superior genes."
"Superior genes, says someone who can't reach the top shelf."
She kicked him, foot clanging off his prosthetic,
"I am a foot taller than you."
He placed his hand next to his ear,
"What was that, I can't hear you over how short you are."
Sunny shook her head,
"At least I have binocular vision and both my knees."
"So we are gonna ignore that that binocular vision is due to a prosthetic now after the whole “your mom” incident? And also, veeery important: weird neck nostrils, don't forget about those!"
"Oh yes, so I can’t house them on my face like you and your bigass nose."
"Low blow, low blow."
"There are... Lower things... I could make fun of."
He snorted,
"Can't make fun of it if you've never seen it. You on the other hand, walking around in the nude..."
"You're welcome. Who wouldn't love…"
She gestured to herself,
"This."
"Mmm yeah... chitin, very sexy."
"I am a gift to the universe, and should be appreciated by everyone."
He brushed a hand through his hair,
"Well I find that real gifts are gift wrapped, so jot that down."
"Oh yeah, like a prank gift when you put something lame in a box for something cool."
He frowned at her,
"You wound me. My feelings are so very very hurt. I might even cry."
"I drink human tears."
"That… that's really gross.'
She laughed and then they lapsed into silence. She could hear him breathing quietly next to her in the darkness, his chest rising and falling under the ambient blue light. She looked across the room to where her saint armor was hanging in its climate-controlled case illuminated to a pearly sheen.
"Adam?"
"Yeah?”
"You know I'm just kidding about calling you dumb right?"
"Yeah I know."
"I'm proud of what you've been doing."
Adam turned to look at her rather incredulous,
"Me, of what? I haven't been doing shit."
"So, we are just going to ignore you overthrowing a maniacal politician while simultaneously piloting a 2,000 year old spacecraft?"
"That was more Conn and Eris than it was me."
"It was your idea."
"Let’s not forget Admiral Kelly."
Sunny pulled him closer,
"I am sorry, I will not be accepting anything other than you acknowledging that you did a good job."
"Screw you!”
"You'd like that wouldn't you?”
He sighed,
"You've been talking to Ramirez WAY too much."
She was only slightly smug as she rested her head back against the pillow,
"I really should get up and train..."
"We should yeah..."
Neither of them moved.
"Alternatively, we could just... Lay here... All day and do... nothing."
She looked up at the ceiling for a long moment and pretended to be in deep contemplation before…
"Well it's official, you have convinced me. You and your silver tongue."
"I am a master negotiator."
He shifted position putting one arm behind his head,
"Think about it, by this time tomorrow we will be back to space exploring and doing what we should have been doing all along. I can't wait."
"That makes two of us."
Previous First [Next](link)
Want to find a specific one, see the whole list or check fanart?
Here is the link to the master-post.
Intro post by me
OC-whole collection
Patreon of the author
Thanks for reading! As you saw in the title, this is a cross posted story written by starrfallknightrise and I'll just upload some of it here for you guys, if you are interested and want to read ahead, the original story-collection can be found on tumblr or wattpad to read for free. (link above this text under "OC:..." ) It is the Empyrean Iris story collection by starfallknightrise. Also, if you want to know more about the story collection i made an intro post about it, so feel free to check that out to see what other great characters to look forward to! (Link also above this text). I have no affiliations to the author; just thought I’d share some of the great stories you might enjoy a lot!
Obviously, I have Charlie’s permission to post this and for the people already knowing the stories, or starting to read them: If you follow the link and check out the story you will see some differences. I made some small (non-artistic) changes, mainly correcting writing mistakes, pronoun correction and some small additional info here and there of things which were not thought of/forgotten or even were added/changed in later stories (like the “USS->UNSC” prefix of Stabby, Chalar=/->Sunny etc). As well as some "biggemajor" changes in descriptions and info’s for the same stringency/continuity reason. That can be explained by the story collection being, well a story collection at the start with many standalone-stories just starring the same people, but later on it gets more to a stringent storyline with backstories and throwbacks. (For example Adam Vir has some HEAVY scars over his body, following his bones, which were not really talked about up till half the collection, where it says it covers his whole body and you find out via backflash that he had them the whole time and how he got them, they just weren't mentioned before. However, I would think a doctor would at least see these scars before that, especially since he gets analyzed, treated and goes shirtless/in T-shirts in some stories). So TLDR: Writing and some descriptions are slightly changed, with full OK from the author, since he himself did not bother to correct these things before.

i (25 f) have been dating my gf (22 f) for almost a year now. we live together and things have been great.
she has a very close knit family. she’s extremely close to her twin and her parents. because of that, we have a lot of family time. i have a good time most of the time, but specifically her mom rubs me the wrong way sometimes. it’s become hard to attend family gatherings as they are almost every weekend and i feel like i don’t have time to recharge after being around her.
for example, we went to a dinner last weekend. they are hispanic and i am not, so i only know a bit of spanish. she made a whole scene pointing out how i don’t know the language and laughed about me to the waitress, right in front of me. i understood enough to know she was being mean. she then tried to not tip the waitress and told me to just pay the whole bill when i offered some cash to tip. she ended up paying it but she wasn’t happy that i immediately agreed and offered to pay.
the weekend before, she took her daughters to get their nails done and offered to bring me. i thanked her and said i already got mine done with my mom for a mother’s day gift. she cut me off and said “you’re white you have money.” i mean…i’m a teacher so i can pay my bills but i genuinely had to budget for these nails.
she’s constantly commenting on what i wear, expecting me to wear far more revealing things than i’m comfortable with. she made me change for a party once and i was crying in the bathroom. constantly threatening to take my gf away if we don’t include her “other baby.” (they’re 22). constantly twisting the truth to make her a victim (pretending like we didn’t ask her if she wanted food at a restaurant we stopped at for example).
my gf knows i feel this way and will stand up for me in the moment but nothing changes. we have to see her mom again this weekend and she says i don’t need to come with, but it’s celebrating her dads birthday and i want to be present.
if you don’t like your in laws, how do you balance being present for your partner and protecting your mental health?

My husband and I adopted two kittens on February 5th this year, they’re not little mates and one was 12 weeks and one was 14 weeks old. A Siamese mix that was brought in at a couple days old because the owner of the mama cat wanted to gift a brand new kitten to her friends little boy but they couldn’t take care of the round the clock feedings nor did they want a cat, she’s the older one we call Lainey. The other is a Siamese who was rescued from a breeder at just 4 weeks old along with a bunch of other Siamese kittens, mothers, and a stud male. The kitten that was rescued from the breeder must’ve had a hard time entering the world as her tail, her litter mates tails were all severely broken and looking like corkscrew’s. She’s the younger one we call Sophie.
Three months no issues other than Lainey bullying Sophie occasionally, now Sophie is starting to fight back. Lainey has been pretty mean to her from the start, the adoption/rescue we went through wanted them adopted out together. When I say mean, I mean kicking her out of bed, kicking her off furniture, absolutely tormenting her. Not just kitten play.
The thing is Lainey is going up to Sophie just attacking her for nothing, Sophie tries getting away before fighting back, the wounds Sophie has left on Lainey these last two weeks are what have me feeling like we should re-home one of them. My husband gets really mad about this and scolds me saying no. They’ve been to the vet since this and the vet says they’re both fine, there’s no underlying issues causing the behavior, and we should think of getting rid of one of them. I have a soft spot for Sophie, she’s the sweetest thing. My husband has a soft spot for Lainey.. I’m at a loss because I don’t like the wounds on Lainey that Sophie is giving all to protect herself from Lainey. My husband just will not let us re-home one of the kittens. Any professional or any advice someone can give me, on what to do about Lainey’s increasing aggression and getting my husband on board with finding a new home for her? My aunt lives in our neighborhood and has wanted Lainey since the day we got her…
Keeping Sophie seems like the better idea because we also have children and will Lainey becoming more aggressive I need to think to keep the more mild mannered one. Lainey has tried biting our kids before but has been unsuccessful so far, most of her aggression is saved for Sophie.

Apologies if this is posted in the wrong place. I had my car SORN while waiting on an mot date, yesterday I drove it to the test centre (northern ireland) in the morning for an appointment that evening. On route I passed a fixed ANPR camera. Once passed the mot I taxed the car straight away. What I'm wondering is can I expect to get a fine in the post.

Lately, both in person and on this sub, I have seen a worrying amount of misinformation spreading about the political party Aon Tu. This misinformation either states that they are a left/liberal party or that they are not right/conservative. This is however clearly wrong as any amount of introspection of their statements and social media makes clear; any clear dive into their policies and statements make it clear that they are instead very right wing, if not far right. They use the many familiar terms associated with similar parties, hold the same stances, and even retweet them and their content.
In order to illustrate this below I am presenting the various tweets made by Peadar Tóibín (the current leader of the party, their founder, and currently sole elected official) as well as their official twitter account. I have limited it solely to tweets due to time and space constraints, I have also had to limit the amount of tweets due to the same constraints There is more and I strongly encourage anyway to check their accounts for themselves. If there is interest I can do a deep dive into their other socials and statements, however I do not think there is a way to access the backlog of debates they have had on RTE and radio unfortunately. I believe this thread will stand on it's own however and other such threads won't be needed.
I will present the below tweets without comment, sorting them only into sections for ease of reading. Some may contain a note below in order to give more context as to what the tweet is referencing. The one section I did not include was the various tweets on the referendum, this is because due to recency I did not think it was needed.
Vaccine Denial:
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 12/07/2021

Aontú opposes vaccine Passports for indoor Hospitality.
Its discrimination against many people mostly the young.
Its mandatory vaccination through the back door.
Again the Irish Gov is alone in the whole of Europe in the extreme path it's taking.

Tweeted by Toibin; 17/10/2021

99.7% of the adult population in Waterford is fully vaccinated, yet it has one of the highest Covid-19 incidence rates in the country.
The truth is the Gov don't know why this is happening.](https://x.com/Toibin1/status/1449783978802794502)
Now they will refuse entry to pubs to 0.3% unvaccinated to see does that work. #NPHET

Tweeted by Toibin; 10/01/2022

No, it's not April Fools day.
That people being paid by the state are actually discussing this is incredible.
FF/FG/Greens need to knock this madness on the head ASAP.

Note: Linked news article can be found here; Nphet to consider mandatory vaccination, department preparing paper on legal and ethical aspects
Anti Covid Lockdown:
Tweeted by Toibin; 15/11/2020

480 people got Cancer today.
24 people died of Cancer today
27 people died of Heart Disease and Stroke today.
This will hardly get a mention in the media today.
#COVID19

Tweeted by Toibin; 13/05/2021

8 deaths related to Covid were reported yesterday.
We share our deepest sympathies with these families.
The manner in which Covid deaths are being reported is concerning.
They were all from March or earlier.
Reporting them yesterday gives people a false impression of risk.

Tweeted by Toibin; 26/05/2021

The majority of people who died from Covid caught Covid in a Nursing Home or a Hospital.
So while the whole country was shut closed most people died in locations that were run by or regulated by the government.
This is an incredible situation.

Note: A video is attached.
Tweeted by Toibin; 05/06/2021

All the the people with Covid in Hospital in Ireland would fit on 1 Double Decker Bus.
Yet people were baton charged in Dublin last night and
Pubs and Restaurants wont open indoors for another month.
#ItsTimeForCommonSense #OpenHospitality #southwilliamst #Aontú

Tweeted by Toibin; 14/07/2021

The Government's Hospitality Discrimination Bill has passed all stages in the Dáil after only a few hours of debate.

Tweeted by Aon Tu; 30/10/2021

Some citizens are allowed into pubs.
Some citizens are not.
It's stunning that this has happened in the 21st century.
It's stunning that so much of society has just accepted it.
Worst of all, it's not even working.

Tweeted by Toibin; 24/11/2021

I have recieved information that the Goverment,
has carried out NO scientific research into the effectiveness or otherwise of the Covid Pass.
At all.
#FollowTheScience #TheySaid
It will be now legal to discriminate against certain Irish citizens.
A sad day for Ireland.

Note: The bill which has a picture taken of it in the tweet can be read here.
Tweeted by Toibin; 17/12/2021

Are the Gov going to say that a healthy young person thats triple vaccinated along with their Covid Pass can't have a pint after 5pm.
What's the point of it all so?

Tweeted by Toibin; 21/01/2022

Very interesting to see Nphet and the Dept of Health go from researching Mandatory Vaccines to lifting restrictions in 10 days!

Tweeted by Toibin; 12/10/2022

I have submitted this question;
To ask the Minister for Health, has he or his department ever received any data, evidence or information from Pfizer that indicates that that the Pfizer Covid Vaccine was ever tested in terms of its ability to stop the transmission of Covid?

Anti LGBT:
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 24/10/2022

Women live in period poverty just a few miles from the Dáil.
Instead of helping them,
your virtual signalling political establishment
put a tampon machine in the men's toilet in the Dáil.

Tweeted by Toibin; 16/02/2023

Plans by FF, FG & Greens to change the law to allow 16 year olds to legally change gender, against advice of medical experts,
shows how completely alienated the political bubble is from the people of Ireland.
Aontú will oppose this and seek a return to commonsense and science.

Tweeted by Aon Tu; 05/03/2023

When Minister O Gorman refused redress to many who had been in Mother and Baby Homes because of the 'lack of money', he raided hundreds of thousands from the Magdalene Scheme and Travellers supports & diverted the funding towards the LGBTQ+ Community.

Note: There is an article linked in the tweet, about an accusation made by Toibin. Read it here
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 06/03/2023

Varadkar is wrong. 9 &10 year old children are too young to be taught about transgenderism. We have a duty of care to children.
No research has been has been carried out on the impact of such education.

Tweeted by Toibin; 07/03/2023

I've asked the Minister for Ed what research has the Dept of Education carried out
on the impact on primary school children of delivering material on Transgenderism to them in the classroom?
We've a duty of care to children.
Education should be based on evidence not ideology.

Tweeted by Aon Tu; 08/03/2023

Tóibín asked Varadkar if his Gov had carried out any research as to the impact on 8 & 9 year old children of teaching about transgenderism in primary school.
Leo refused to answer the question.
Radical changes are being introduced against majority consent.

Note: There is an attached video.
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 15/03/2023

Many people have been shocked by Paul Murphy's announcement.
But what's more shocking is that FF, FG, SF and the Greens,
are on exactly the same page as the hard left parties on teaching this ideology in every primary school in the country.

Tweeted by Toibin; 21/05/2023

This is incredible. All the actual crime that is happening on our streets and Gardaí are wasting time like this.
Even though there was no arrest here, this harassment creates a clear chilling effect on free speech and political discourse.

Note: There is an attached video in the tweet retweeted by Toibin, in it a Gardai is holding a polite conversation with an American holding a sign against "Gender Ideology." In their Twitter bio they describe themselves; "Father of two girls. Traveling the world to expose gender ideology and why children cannot consent to medical transition."
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 07/07/2023

Growing concern among parents that the new curriculum for 12 & 13 years in school is not age appropriate & is not science based.
Gender identity ideology is now mandatory for schools & thousands of parents will have no option but to withdraw their child from class.

Note: This article is linked on the topic of a statement made by Toibin.
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 23/07/2023

This is why so many are angry with the Minister for Culture Wars, Helen McEntee.
Homicides are up, murder attempts are up, rape & sexual assaults are up, theft is up. Yet....
Gardaí management are focused on allowing male born Gardaí use women’s toilets.

Note: There is an attached article; here
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 28/09/2023

The Green Party are becoming increasingly authoritarian in nature.
If you dissent from government sanctioned views, you will be investigated.
This is the opposite of a liberal democracy.

Note: There is a linked article; it pertains to an investigation by the IABA into the usage of their premises by a "Christian Group" advocating for the removal of all LGBT+ content from the SPHE curriculum.
Tweeted by Toibin; 14/03/2024

It is reckless beyond belief to give dangerous chemicals and irreversible surgery to children with gender dysphoria.
This must be made illegal in Ireland immediately.

Note: Includes a retweet of this news article.
Anti Hatespeech bill:
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 15/06/2023

Helen McEntee has become the Minister for Culture Wars.
Incredibly Varadkar accused PBP of being a threat to Free Speech.
FG, FF & the Greens are the biggest threat to free speech.

Note: There is a link article here.
Tweeted by Toibin; 26/07/2023

US gives Dublin a security warning for US citizens travelling to Ireland.
Meanwhile Minister McEntee is too busy with the Hate Speech Bill and Safe Zone Bill to worry about real people suffering actual crime.

Tweeted by Toibin; 28/03/2024

Helen McEntee is distracted by the Culture Wars.
People just want her to do her job, & make the streets safer.
Instead, she spent the last two years on a Hate Crime Bill no one wants. #BinTheBill

Note: There is an attached video.
Other:
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 15/02/2023

In the Dáil yesterday the hard left tried to close down a discussion on migration by calling people names.
This issue is too important. People have a right to respectfully ask questions and challange government policy.

Note: There is an attached video; it does not depict such name calling but rather Toibin accusing the government of name calling.
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 24/07/2023

Another day and another culture war imported by the government from America.

Note: A retweet from Gript media with an attached video.
Tweeted by Toibin; 12/03/2024

There is a battle over the narrative of the referendum defeat happening at the moment.
Some within the political & media bubble want to erase the fact that so many people have had enough of the culture wars and want the country to get back to commonsense and bread and butter.

Tweeted by Aon Tu; 19/03/2024

At a Dept of Education 'In Service' day,
their staff told secondary school teachers not to use the word 'Mother' in class as they said it was not inclusive.
They are implementing Gov policy.
Aontú disagrees wholeheartedly with this policy.
Happy Mothers Day.

Tweeted by Toibin; 10/04/2024

Says the man who seeks to delete more Irish sovereignty with the EU migration pact.

Note: A retweet from Simon Harris talking about the need to defend Ukraine's sovereignty.
Tweeted by Aon Tu; 11/04/2024

The decision by FG, FF and Green MEPs to cede the power to control immigration into Ireland to Brussels was a serious mistake. Aontú oppose this pact and will fight to retain and regain sovereignty in Europe #aontú

Growing up I was given the usual "I'm not your friend, I'm your mother" spiel. I wasn't allowed to talk to her because I "shouldn't bother her with my childish and girly problems" (a big part of her horrible treatment towards me was misogyny - she was very accomodating with my brothers). Honestly I figured out pretty early on that she hated me so it wasn't so bad, I actually did prefer to not be so friendly with her. So she pretty much has known nothing about me all my life other than what you'd find on government documents, like my job, my degree etc. Doesn't know any of my friends. Never met any boyfriend or girlfriend. Doesn't know anything about my hobbies or interests, aside from maybe cooking, since I like to cook for everyone when I have time. Though I obviously have issues from physical abuse and general scapegoatery as a boymom's only daughter, this particular setup has never been a problem for me. She is such a judgemental person and always had something negative to say so I loved that I could keep my life private from her.
Now I'm not American, and in my culture we don't really move out until we get married. So I've lived with her for 27 years and pretty much only ate and slept at home, and lived the majority of my life outside of it. She is now 55, and in recent years many of her work and sports friends are my age or close to it - she is extremely fit, meets lots of new people at sports events, and is actually very sociable and friendly to people who are not her daughter. Lately she has been doing very gross things to me, things she does with her friends, like holding my hand or giving me a hug. She has NEVER EVER done that before. It makes me feel uncomfortable. We'll be at the grocery store and suddenly she'll wrap her arm around mine. Eugh. While at dinner she'll suddenly tell me how smart I am, how I could do anything I set my mind to, that I could reach my dreams. Wtf. This woman used to tell me I'm so stupid that I'll never amount to anything and to kms. I can't even look at her these days, she is acting so damn weird. And despite the lack of affection I have for her I actually feel bad when I push her away. Despite the abuse she's still the reason I live a comfortable life today. She still slaved day and night for me like a typical mother. I was abused but not neglected, do you get what I mean? In fact I was spoiled, materially speaking. Never denied anything I asked for. Like I have some issues and some trauma but I'm still grateful, you know? My feelings are complicated.
Our previous setup was so perfect, I could show her my gratefulness for raising me by cooking, contributing to the bills, keeping house, all while being emotionally distant, without having to hurt her. It's like NC except we live together and I can take care of her and dad. Just the way I like it. Do I give her the "I'm not your friend, I'm your daughter" spiel?

My husband passed away. He had our kids as the beneficiaries for his pension. I was told as his wife I won’t get anything. Is there anything I can do?

We escaped my abusive father and moved into my grandma's house to take care of her, she passed around three weeks ago, the family wants to sell the house, and want us out by the end of May. We have been on a house hunt since and obviously with the state of council housing in the country, they put us in a housing band where we literally have no chance, and they were actually quite rude about it.
We have started looking private. My mother is of course unemployed since she was caring full-time for my grandma, and I am a full-time student. So we have to live within housing benefit rates. There's nothing livable in my local authority, so we have to look further. We have enquired about thirty or so homes and we either get ignored, or get offered a viewing, offer to place down a deposit, and we don't even get a chance to pay, before they tell us they found a 'better candidate'
It literally feels like there is no help available for our situation.

Kailan ba ako makakatulog ng mahimbing????
I'm 23F, breadwinner. 4 kami magkakapatid and lahat nag-aaral pa and im the eldest. no parents, our mother passed away when i was 15 years old, and father naman namin nung 2021 sila tita lang ang nagpalaki at nag-guide sakin lalo sa mga kapatid ko kaya at a very young age (15 years old) i was forced to be independent and save myself since then.
Ilang buwan na akong literal na puyat at walang tulog. Im working in a BPO sa gabi and OJT naman sa umaga. So after ng work sa umaga deretso naman ng work sa gabi halos 2-3 hours lang tulog and vice versa. Nasweldo ka pero parang dadaan lang sa kamay mo. Graduating na din naman ako this June but sobrang nabuburn out lang ako sa setup this past few months, yung wala kang magawa kasi kapag huminto ka sa pagkayod wala kayong makakain. Yung sister ko na sumunod sa akin di ko naman ma-forced na magwork din while studying kahit minsan iniisip ko na sana may natulong din sakin, sana katulad ko din marealize nila na they need to strive and work for themselves kasi wala kaming ibang aasahan. Yung pangatlo naman kapatid ko, magcocollege palang recently natutunan na din magwork, naguilty pa nga ako kasi alam ko ang pakiramdam na nagttrabaho habang nag-aaral sobra akong naaawa kasi dapat sana naproprovide ko lahat ng needs nila but sobrang kulang talaga. Yung bunso naman namin, highschool minsan sinasalo ni tita yung pambaon (laking tulong din talaga ng mga tita namin sa amin since bata kami)
Feeling ko ang dami dami kong issues sa sarili ko na ultimo ako di ko mafigure out kung ano, lalo na sa future path na gusto ko tahakin, sa sobrang focus ko makatapos ng pag-aaral at magkadiploma nalang, makpaagtrabaho at makapagprovide, now ko lang narerealize na hindi pala ito yung path (psychology) na gusto ko, i was focused back then on surviving without considering what i really want to do for the rest of my life.
Sobrang naiinggit talaga ko sa mga may mga magulang na sumusuporta sa kanila. Iniisip ko palagi hanggang kailan ako ganito? May nagawa ba akong masama sa past life ko kaya ganito kabigat na responsibilidad ang binigay sa akin? Or puro inconvenience lang lagi ko naattract talaga.
I'm just so tired and i feel so lost. Bakit ngayon pa, ngayon pa na malapit na ko sa finish line ng kolehiyo?

If you read my last post, you will see that my conversations with Bobby toward the end of my time at South Grove were not exactly going well. Throughout the process of leaving and meeting with him, I kept wondering “when is he going to let go?” It felt as though he was going to cling to me until I eventually caved and came back. He had allowed my wife and I to stop serving and even attend other churches to take a break. I’m not sure if he thought I would attend somewhere else, be reminded that God only moves at South Grove, and then come back. That was not the case at all. We attended a church in Sandy Springs, GA and then one in Athens, GA which I had attended before. I had never heard preaching like that in person before. Those pastors gave me Christ each Sunday that I attended. That, coupled with my conscience, made it impossible to even think about going back to South Grove.
As a somewhat funny side note, Bobby apparently changed the music that was played on Sunday(s)? I had mentioned in passing during one of our conversations that I had issues with Bethel, Hillsong, and Elevation Church. Interestingly I was discipled by the preaching at each of those churches early on in my Christian life. However, I had become highly concerned with their theology and how other members might read their name on the lyric screen, and listen to their preaching. Anyway, Bobby brought up the fact that they changed the music “for me.” Honestly, the music was one of my last worries.
Before my last conversation with Bobby, he wanted to know why I couldn’t disagree with issues concerning spiritual gifts and the other issues I had and still be a member in good conscience. I remember the first time I brought conscience up to him, he seemed puzzled. I tried to explain to him that because of the way I felt about certain doctrines, I could not be a member because I believed that I was going against my conscience. That did not register with him.
Up to our final conversation, I felt like I was in a vice grip. I really thought Bobby was going to draw out the painful process of trying to get me to stay at South Grove over several months. That and him trying to pit my wife against me (probably a story for another time). But finally, over lunch at the Blind Pig, something changed. In our last lunch, the vice grip seemed to be loosened completely. Bobby asked if I had heard of the “Leaving the Network” website. I had no idea what he was talking about, but he said he addressed it at a team meeting. I thought nothing of it. He also said “I’m sorry if I’ve ever hurt you in any way.” Pretty vague, but I guess I appreciated it? He blessed me to leave at that point. A few months later, he grabbed lunch with my new pastor at Cleveland Road Baptist Church to “check in” on my wife and I. I would’ve loved to be a fly on the wall, but unfortunately I don’t know much about that conversation other than some of the awkwardness.
That was the last of the excruciating process of leaving South Grove. From being told I had a demon, to “where else are you going to go?”, to Bobby planting seeds of doubt in my wife’s mind, to “I need protected from the sheep,” to anger even mentioning my doubts about Steve Morgan, to “I bless you to leave.” If I said everything was smooth sailing after that, I would be a liar. I think about my time at South Grove everyday. I think of those who I hurt and I think about those who were hurt just like me. I think about those who are deceived and blindly follow. I think about the people who were once my family who would no longer and still no longer talk to me. I think about what was said about me after I left, if anything. I’m angry most days and sometimes I don’t know why. Except I do know why. I was a fool. Who moves across the country for something like that? Who gives up everything for something like that? Apparently someone like me. And for what? If nothing, it makes me long for justice. It makes me long for the day that I will be brought home to the One who loves me. That day seems really far away now though. Until then, I’m tormented by my time in the Network.

I suppose I’m trying to understand if anyone else ever went through something similar.
I was a continent away from my family for my studies. It had been two months since I’d left.
I spoke to my parents almost every other day. At 55, my father was the most fit person in the family. He ate healthy and exercised.
They say a person knows or at least gets a hunch before leaving. My father didn’t. He had numerous plans for that day and the next. I spoke to him on video call the day before.
He was perfectly fine, until he wasn’t.
I got that call from one of my father’s friends. My mother didn’t have it in her to break it to me. It was a massive heart attack.
I didn’t cry then.
Alone in my room some 4,000 miles away from home, I didn’t have an active choice to let grief take its due course - that would have to wait. What could not wait was looking for the earliest flight back home while I packed everything, knowing right then clear as day I wouldn’t be back, at least not in a while. I was the oldest child, and I had a younger sibling to take care of. And my mother deserved time to grieve while I handled the aftermath - death certificate, documentation, insurance, and so many other materialistic bullshit spewed at you as if you don’t have to process the loss of a whole human from your life.
Shit needed to be handled, so handle is what I did. I emailed my university that I wouldn’t be able to make it for a course final presentation. I notified my workplace that I won’t be able to make it for a meeting that day. I got to the airport and bought all the chocolates and cashews for my mom and my sibling because them having enough food in their system to survive the next few days was my biggest concern.
I made a to-do list sitting in the plane, noting everything I need to take care of in my father’s absence.
I was so..aware.
I spoke to every immigration and security officer like a regular traveler. I thanked the air hostesses every single time they gave me something to eat. I even wished one of them saying, “Have a good day” before leaving the plane because she was kind enough to dim the lights around me and give me a paracetamol when my head was pounding.
I really went to the immigration officers, looked them dead in the eye, and asked them to make an exception so I could book another flight and get home faster without having to wait 8 hours in transit. They had no idea, but they relented in the end because I stood right in front of them waiting for an answer.
I was hyperaware since the minute I landed. I vividly remember holding my mom, not only because I wanted to shield her from her grief - but also from people - because it was the same day I realized most people have the EQ of a brick wall, especially when it comes to loss.
I hadn’t cried in front of people, not even when they took me to the morgue to see my father, all eyes on me.
People asked my mom about it. My mom did, too.
It positively is not denial. Denial doesn’t make you create a to-do list even before you saw your person.
Sometimes, it’s still difficult to believe this is how things had to be. I never saw the light leave my father’s eyes - I never even got to feel his warmth for the last time. He was freezing cold in that horridly shallow freezer by the time I arrived.
And now, everything feels like a distant memory. Life feels a lot like ‘before’ and ‘after’.

I (28F) have been on a couple of dates with this guy (27M), whom I met on a dating app. First date went great, we had a lot in common and the conversation was free flowing. There was physical contact too, and he kissed me before dropping me at my door (it was a good kiss).
He texted me right away with a little joke about making sure I got home safe, and we texted back and forth for the next couple of weeks. He asked me out again for drinks and I agreed.
The second date went really well too. He asked if I wanted to come back to his place to smoke up (euphemism for sex obviously), I said not tonight but definitely soon, once we know each other better. He didn't mind at all, and the conversation continued as normal. We talked about what we wanted from each other, and both of us were in agreement that it wasn't going to be a casual hook-up or that we were only looking for sex.
The chemistry was through the roof. We downed multiple drinks and were making out at the bar in front of everyone, all over each other basically. Our conversation got sexual and we talked about all the shit we would do to each other as soon as we got the chance.
On the cab ride home is where I fucked up. We made out, he fingered me and I unzipped his pants to return the favour. Except it was dark, I was very drunk, and... couldn't find his dick. I fumbled for a minute and he kept trying to guide me, but unfortunately an internal panic attack hit me. Intrusive thoughts such as "you're 28, still single, groping strangers in a cab" overwhelmed me and I got upset abruptly and pulled my hand away, and withdrew. I didn't tell him what I was thinking of course, but my withdrawal must have been obvious.
The cab reached my place. I mumbled goodbye, gave him a quick hug and bolted. I was so drunk I passed out as soon as I hit the bed. When I woke up the next morning there was no text from him, a contrast from the first date. I texted a long apology for my behaviour in the cab, adding that I had a really great time last night, and wanted to see him soon. I even joked about how I give better handjobs when not drunk out of my mind. He replied 24 hours later saying, "that's okay, hope you weren't hungover." I apologised again, then asked if we're good? Three days later and he still hasn't replied.
I'm confused. If he was only in it for sex, he would've been in touch because I'd already promised him that we'd get down and dirty very soon. So why the cold shoulder? Where did I go so drastically wrong that he won't even reply to me, and how should I rectify it? I really like this person. Opinions please!

Hi everyone, my wife and I have a 3 and a half years old daughter, we both work 8-9 hours 5 days a week, weekends are a planned rush, so we only have like 2 hours to spend with our daughter on a weekday, and I get to spend weekend mornings alone with my daughter. Before going to work, we drop her at my MIL's to take care of her along with my wife's newphews/nieces until we're done then we pick her up and go home.
Past month or two, our daughter's behavior started changing. She started disobeying both myself and my wife. She used to be very obedient and behaving with me, not with her mom though as she's easier with her, while I'm not as easy. I'll give and take but I'm more strict. My wife likes to take more of a diplomatic approach which I honestly don't approve of but can come in handy sometimes. Now she's the same with me. She almost always disobeys me now and I'd have to take harsh measures to get her in check. She's learning wrong/bad behavior while at my MIL's from the other kids and I can't do anything about it. My mom was sick when we had our daughter, she wasn't able to help with her, and she sadly passed away last year. I have no choice but my MIL's. Schools/nurseries/summer programs won't work either as they're a few hours then she's back to my MIL's until we're done with work. Regardless, she starts nursery in September.
I tried talking, and I try it a lot, I give her many chances, but it doesn't seem to work anymore. She just doesn't seem to care until I isolate and ground her. She's become very hard to communicate with as she gets angry and starts to yell and cry as soon as she senses me pushing back/doesn't get/do what she wants. She's copying this behavior from my wife's niece. She does this to basically get anything she wants from her mom, so our daughter expects me or her mom to give her what she wants but instead ends up in her room in her crib until she calms down and then we talk about it. A lot of the bad things she does, she says this or that said or did. So she's just learning and copying bad behavior and there's no one there to decipline her.
My wife thinks I'm being extreme with her. We did agree in the past that when one of us (myself and my wife) notices the other getting extreme we'd let the other know, and she spoke to me about it yesterday. However, this doesn't seem right. Am I just supposed to let her misbehave and disobey us? I don't think so. I like to think that I'm a deciplined person and so was my daughter until lately. I can't watch our daughter as her behavior and obedience turns bad and just be quiet about it- and there's a lot of it, from words that a 3 years old shouldn't be using, to actions no one should be doing, plus much more, and it's getting on my nerves. This is not how I want my children to behave.
We currently have construction going on at home so we're unable to keep her home and isolate her from the kids at my MIL's (we have a nanny/babysitter that takes care of her in our absence). I told my wife that this is something we must do to get her under control again, but she still thinks I'm overreacting. I was able to convince her and we should be able to isolate our daughter next week once the construction is completed.
But before we get there, am I overreacting or am I doing the right thing? I feel like I'm going nuts. This isn't my only issue in life, I have a lot going on in my life atm so I need to hear other opinions. I don't want to be a bad dad. I love our daughter so much, she's been great and I have a lot of fun spending my time with her and I hate that there's this tension between us. She was great this morning before I dropped her to my MIL's. Does anyone wanna guess what's she going to be like when I pick her up from there? 😵‍💫 Thanks and sorry for the long post.