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2024.06.08 21:09 SanderSo47 Directors at the Box Office: Ang Lee

Directors at the Box Office: Ang Lee
https://preview.redd.it/3ey3xk1cce5d1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=013619527a9526a4c1a28fce38d2b1320c6e7192
Here's a new edition of "Directors at the Box Office", which seeks to explore the directors' trajectory at the box office and analyze their hits and bombs. I already talked about a few, and as I promised, it's Ang Lee's turn.
Lee's father, a respect principal, was hoping that his son would become a professor. But he was disappointed when his son failed his high school exam twice, forcing him to attend a less privileged university. Seeing Ingmar Bergman's film The Virgin Spring was a formative experience for him. After finishing his mandatory military service, he moved to the United States to complete his studies. He wanted to become an actor, but his struggle with English made him move into directing. After finally meeting a few contacts in the industry, he started working as a director.
From a box office perspective, how reliable was he to deliver a box office hit?
That's the point of this post. To analyze his career.

Pushing Hands (1991)

His directorial debut. It stars Sihung Lung, Lai Wang, Bo Z. Wang, Deb Snyder and Haan Lee. It follows a Chinese tai chi master living in New York, who struggles to find his place in the world. The film shows the contrast between traditional Chinese ideas of Confucian relationships within a family and the much more informal Western emphasis on the individual.
Lee graduated from New York University Tisch School of the Arts in 1984, but had failed to find career opportunities since, working almost full-time as a house-father. During the intermediate six years, he became interested in martial arts, specifically tai chi, after reading the wuxia novel Jianghu qixia zhuan. This motivated him to write a screenplay, which brought the attention of Hsu Li-kong, a recently promoted senior manager in a major studio who had a strong interest in Lee's unique style and freshness. He invited Lee to make his directorial debut.
It had a very limited release, and it was reported that it made just $152,322 domestically. But it received acclaim in the United States and Taiwan. And that allowed Lee to finally get a chance to expand his horizon.
  • Budget: N/A.
  • Domestic gross: $152,322.
  • Worldwide gross: $152,322.

The Wedding Banquet (2023)

"You are cordially invited to a wedding where everybody wants to kiss the bride... except the groom."
His second film. The film stars Gua Ah-leh, Lung Sihung, May Chin, Winston Chao and Mitchell Lichtenstein. The story concerns a bisexual Taiwanese immigrant man who marries a mainland Chinese woman to placate his parents and get her a green card. His plan backfires when his parents arrive in the United States to plan his wedding banquet and he has to hide the truth of his gay partner.
Neil Peng approached Lee with the idea in 1986 by revealing to Lee that one of their mutual friends had moved to the United States and was in a same-sex relationship without the knowledge of the man's parents. Lee and Peng began writing the screenplay two years later and were soon joined by James Schamus. Schamus wrote that the film was "first drafted in Chinese, then translated into English, re-written in English, translated back into Chinese, and eventually subtitled in Chinese and English and a dozen other languages."
The film was critically acclaimed, and became a sleeper hit, earning $23.6 million against a budget of just $1 million. Lee was on the rise.
  • Budget: $1,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $6,933,459.
  • Worldwide gross: $23,633,459.

Eat Drink Man Woman (1994)

"It's hard to tell where sex stops and food begins."
His third film. It stars Sihung Lung, Wang Yu-wen, Wu Chien-lien, and Yang Kuei-mei. It follows four members of the Zhu family as they navigate the challenges of love, life, tradition and family. This film deals with the transition from tradition to modernity. It is Lee's first (and to date, only film) to be shot entirely in his native Taiwan.
Like his previous films, another critical and commercial success. Lee quickly made himself a household name.
  • Budget: N/A.
  • Domestic gross: $7,294,403.
  • Worldwide gross: $24,294,403.

Sense and Sensibility (1995)

"Lose your heart and come to your senses."
His fourth film. Based on the novel by Jane Austen, and it stars Emma Thompson (who also wrote the screenplay), Kate Winslet, Hugh Grant and Alan Rickman. The story follows the Dashwood sisters, members of a wealthy English family of landed gentry, as they must deal with circumstances of sudden destitution. They are forced to seek financial security through marriage.
In 1989, producer Lindsay Doran suggested adapting the novel to her colleagues. She was a lifelong fan of the novel, and vowed to make a film adaptation if she ever made it into the industry. Looking for a writer, Doran read screenplays by English and American writers until she came across a series of comedic skits, often in period settings, that actress Emma Thompson had written and decided that that was the direction she wanted for the film. As they were working on the film Dead Again, Doran hired Thompson to write the film, even though she never wrote a feature-length film before.
Thompson spent five years writing and revising the screenplay, both during and between shooting other films. Believing the novel's language to be "far more arcane than in [Austen's] later books," Thompson sought to simplify the dialogue while retaining the "elegance and wit of the original." Despite Doran's confidence, studios were reluctant to pick up the film, as Thompson never wrote a film. Columbia Pictures executive Amy Pascal supported Thompson's work and agreed to sign as the producer and distributor.
In 1993, Lee was hired to direct, basically for his work in The Wedding Banquet. Even though he was not familiar with Jane Austen, Doran felt that Lee's films, which depicted complex family relationships amidst a social comedy context, were a good fit with Austen's storylines. Viewing it as a "director for hire" job, Lee spent six months in preparing for the film, as it would have his largest budget ($16 million) by that point. Doran and Columbia asked Thompson to play Elinor herself.
The film received widespread critical acclaim, and was included on more than a hundred top-ten of the year lists, as well as one of the best Austen adaptations. It was a huge box office hit, earning $134 million worldwide. It received 7 Oscar nominations, including Best Picture and Best Actress. Thompson won Best Adapted Screenplay, making her the only person to have won an Oscar for both her writing and acting (she won Best Actress two years prior). However, Lee was not nominated for Best Director, a decision that was criticized by many as Hollywood's racism against Lee and Chinese cinema in general. Lee sought to avoid turning his omission into a scandal and specifically asked the Taiwan state media not to make it a "national issue", explaining that he endured more pressure when forced to act as his country's representative.
  • Budget: $16,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $43,182,776.
  • Worldwide gross: $134,582,776.

The Ice Storm (1997)

"The American Dream was over. But the hangover was just beginning."
His fifth film. Based on the novel by Rick Moody, it stars Kevin Kline, Joan Allen, Tobey Maguire, Christina Ricci, Elijah Wood, Katie Holmes, Glenn Fitzgerald, Jamey Sheridan and Sigourney Weaver. Set during Thanksgiving 1973, it follows two dysfunctional New Canaan, Connecticut, upper-class families who are trying to deal with tumultuous social changes of the early 1970s, and their escapism through alcohol, adultery and sexual experimentation.
The film ended Lee's winning streak at the box office, but it was still critically acclaimed.
  • Budget: $18,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $8,038,061.
  • Worldwide gross: $16,011,975.

Ride with the Devil (1999)

"In a no-man's land between North and South, you didn't fight for the blue or grey, you fought for your friends and your family."
His sixth film. Based on the novel Woe to Live On by Daniel Woodrell, it stars Tobey Maguire, Skeet Ulrich, Jeffrey Wright, Jewel, Simon Baker, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, James Caviezel, Thomas Guiry and Jonathan Brandis. Set during the American Civil War, it follows a group of men who join the First Missouri Irregulars, also known as the Bushwhackers — guerrilla units loyal to pro-Confederacy units of the state — and their war against Northern Jayhawkers allied with the Union army.
Despite commanding a $38 million budget, the film had a very limited three-day run, making less than $1 million. It also received mixed reviews from critics.
  • Budget: $38,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $635,096.
  • Worldwide gross: $635,096.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000)

"A timeless story of strength, secrets, and two warriors who would never surrender."
His seventh film. Based on the Chinese novel serialized between 1941 and 1942 by Wang Dulu, it stars Chow Yun-fat, Michelle Yeoh, Zhang Ziyi, and Chang Chen. Master Li Mu Bai, a warrior, is about to retire and gives his sword to his lover Yu Shu Lien to keep it safe. However, the sword is stolen and now an embittered Li embarks on a mission to find it.
The stunt work was mostly performed by the actors themselves and Ang Lee stated in an interview that computers were used "only to remove the safety wires that held the actors" aloft. "Most of the time you can see their faces," he added. "That's really them in the trees." The film specifically targeted Western audiences rather than the domestic audiences who were already used to Wuxia films. As a result, high-quality English subtitles were needed. Ang Lee, who was educated in the West, personally edited the subtitles to ensure they were satisfactory for Western audiences.
Whatever were the expectations for this, the film exceeded them by a large margin. After a limited release, it earned $8 million in its first wide domestic opening weekend. But the crazy thing was how insane were its legs; it didn't hit a sub $4 million weekend until its 12th wide weekend, and it even increased from some weekends. It closed with a colossal $128 million domestically, becoming the highest foreign-language film in United States, a record it still keeps, and it's twice as much as the second place, Life Is Beautiful. Worldwide, it earned $213.9 million worldwide, becoming a worldwide phenomenon and Lee's highest grossing film.
The film was widely acclaimed across the world, hailed as one of the greatest films of the century. The film led to a boost in popularity of Chinese wuxia films in the Western world, where they were previously little known, and led to films such as Hero and House of Flying Daggers, both directed by Zhang Yimou, being marketed towards Western audiences. It received 10 Oscar nominations (the most for a foreign film), including Best Picture and Best Director for Lee. It won four: Best Foreign Language Film, Best Art Direction, Best Original Score, and Best Cinematography. To this day, one of the most iconic foreign titles. Lee made history.
  • Budget: $17,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $128,530,421.
  • Worldwide gross: $213,978,518.

Hulk (2003)

"Unleash the fury."
His eighth film. Based on the Marvel Comics character created by Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, it stars Eric Bana, Jennifer Connelly, Sam Elliott, Josh Lucas, and Nick Nolte. The film explores Bruce Banner's origins. After a lab accident involving gamma radiation, he transforms into a giant green-skinned humanoid with superhuman strength known as the Hulk whenever stressed or emotionally provoked. The United States military pursues him, and he clashes with his biological father, who has dark plans for his son.
Since 1990, Avi Arad and Gale Ann Hurd were working on a Hulk film, but Universal was struggling in finding the right script. Hurd brought her husband Jonathan Hensleigh as co-producer the following year, and Universal hired Industrial Light & Magic to create the Hulk with computer-generated imagery. Joe Johnston was hired as director, but he eventually left to work on another film, while Zak Penn was brought to rewrite. Hensleigh subsequently rewrote the script with J. J. Abrams. Scott Alexander and Larry Karaszewski were also brought on board to rewrite, with Hensleigh deciding to direct the film himself despite not having directed before. By 1998, Universal put the film on hiatus due to its escalating $100 million budget and worries of Hensleigh directing his first film. $20 million was already spent on script development, computer animation, and prosthetics work. Hensleigh immediately went to rewrite the script to reduce the budget.
In 2001, Lee and his colleague James Schamus signed for the project, after Lee chose not to direct Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines. He was dissatisfied with the script and commissioned Schamus for a rewrite, merging Banner's father with the Absorbing Man. Lee cited influences from King Kong, Frankenstein, Jekyll and Hyde, Beauty and the Beast, Faust, and Greek mythology to interpret the story. Schamus said he had found the storyline that introduced Brian Banner, allowing Lee to write a drama that again explored father-son themes. Schamus admitted to feeling pressure after the release of Spider-Man.
Eric Bana commented that the shoot was "Ridiculously serious... a silent set, morbid in a lot of ways." Lee told him that he was shooting a Greek tragedy, and that he would be making a "whole other movie" about the Hulk at Industrial Light & Magic. An example of Lee's arthouse approach to the film was taking Bana to watch a bare-knuckle boxing match. Bana would later disfavorably reflect on his experience making the film as the majority of the time he was working indoors while the rest of the cast interacted with a CGI recreation of the Hulk, somewhat limiting his screen time.
After the colossal success of Spider-Man, Universal mounted an extensive marketing campaign, which also highlighted Ang Lee's involvement. The film opened with a huge $62.1 million in its first weekend, the biggest June debut and the 16th biggest ever. However, the film had absolutely no legs at the box office. In its second weekend, it dropped a colossal 69.7%, which was the biggest for a film that opened above $20 million. In its third weekend, it fell another steep 56.3% and it kept falling until it left theaters, becoming the largest opener not to earn $150 million. It closed with $132 million domestically and $245 million worldwide. Good enough to be the 15th highest grossing film of the year and Lee's highest grossing film, but not a hit given its $137 million budget.
If Spider-Man was an immediate crowd-pleaser, Hulk was the exact opposite. It received polarizing reviews; while its ambition and style was praised, a lot criticized its CGI and very limited action ("too much talking and not enough smashing"). In subsequent years, some have praised the film as an ambitious film that deviated from the superhero formula, although it's still not widely considered as a beloved film. Lee admitted the challenges of the film, but stood proud of the film and its fans.
  • Budget: $137,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $132,177,234.
  • Worldwide gross: $245,285,165.

Brokeback Mountain (2005)

"Love is a force of nature."
His ninth film. Based on the short story by Annie Proulx, it stars Heath Ledger, Jake Gyllenhaal, Anne Hathaway, Michelle Williams and Randy Quaid. Its plot depicts the complex romantic relationship between two American cowboys, Ennis Del Mar and Jack Twist, in the American West from 1963 to 1983.
Screenwriter Diana Ossana discovered Annie Proulx's short story in October 1997, just days after its publication. She convinced writing partner Larry McMurtry to read it, who thought it was a "masterpiece". The pair asked Proulx if they could adapt it into a film screenplay; although she did not think that the story would work as a film, she agreed. The big challenge wasn't the script, it was about getting the film made in the first place.
Gus Van Sant attempted to make the film, hoping to cast Matt Damon and Joaquin Phoenix as Ennis and Jack, respectively. He also considered Leonardo DiCaprio, Brad Pitt, Ryan Phillippe and Josh Hartnett. Damon, who previously worked with Van Sant on Good Will Hunting, told the director, "Gus, I did a gay movie (The Talented Mr. Ripley), then a cowboy movie (All the Pretty Horses). I can't follow it up with a gay-cowboy movie!"
James Schamus, who was now the CEO of Focus Features, optioned the film rights in 2001. Pedro Almodovar was approached, but he felt he couldn't get his artistic freedom respected. At Ossana's request, Schamus showed the story and screenplay to Lee. Lee decided instead to make Hulk, and that film's experience left him exhausted, to the point that he considered retiring. When he was offered Brokeback, he changed his mind and agreed to direct. He was particularly drawn to the authentic rural American life and repression depicted in the story.
Ossana and McMurty suggested Heath Ledger, but the film studio thought he was not masculine enough. Regardless, Ledger got the script, who thought it was "beautiful" and put himself forward. Gyllenhaal reacted to the script positively and signed on for the role; he also did not want to miss the opportunity working with Lee and friend Ledger. Lee met with Mark Wahlberg for a role in the film, but Wahlberg declined as he was "creeped out" by the script. Gyllenhaal admired Ledger and described him as "way beyond his years as a human". Other actors were considered for the leads but Lee said they were too afraid to take on the roles.
You have to consider that while the world progressed a lot in the past years, 2005 was a very different era, so a film like Brokeback Mountain had a tough hill to climb. Some countries refused to play the film, while others censored it. LGBT films weren't big at the time, so it felt like there wouldn't be a big audience here.
And they were proven wrong.
The film debuted with $547,425 in 5 theaters, a huge $109,485 per-theater average. It had fantastic legs, eventually closing with a huge $83 million domestically. But the big surprise is that it was bigger overseas; it made $178 million worldwide, becoming Focus Features' highest grossing film. The film received universal acclaim on its release, touted as one of the greatest films of the century. It received 10 Oscar nominations, including Best Picture. It won three: Best Director, Best Adapted Screenplay, and Original Score. In a shocking decision, it lost Best Picture to Crash, a decision that has been reviled ever since. We'd like to say it's a polarizing decision... but let's face it, there are no Crash fans nowadays. Or at least, none that prefer that to Brokeback.
But at the end of the day, it doesn't matter; Brokeback may not have won the Oscar, but it won over the general public.
It wasn't the first LGBT film, not even close. But it might have been the most influential and a huge landmark.
  • Budget: $14,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $83,043,761.
  • Worldwide gross: $178,064,141.

Lust, Caution (2007)

"The trap is set."
His tenth film. Based on the novella by Eileen Chang, it stars Tony Leung Chiu-wai, Tang Wei, Anupam Kher, Joan Chen, Wang Leehom and Shyam Pathak. The film is set in Hong Kong in 1938 and in Shanghai in 1942, when the city was occupied by the Imperial Japanese Army and ruled by the puppet government led by Wang Jingwei. The film depicts a group of Chinese university students from The University of Hong Kong who plot to assassinate a high-ranking special agent and recruiter working for the puppet government by luring him into a honey trap.
The actors who played university classmates, spent six months of preproduction in Hong Kong just to get into character and understand the period before filming. During this period the group of actors, including Tang Wei and Wang Leehom became very close friends. Both Tang Wei and Tony Leung Chiu-wai were asked whether the sex scenes in the movie were unsimulated. Tang Wei responded, "In the movie, we are just doing what we should do to have a baby." As for Tony Leung, he responded, "When the bodies collide with each other, it is indeed like a fake show!" The film was rated NC-17 in North America for its explicit sex scenes, and Lee made it clear he would not re-cut the film. Despite that, the version released in China was cut by about seven minutes (by Lee himself) to make it suitable for younger audiences, since China has no rating system.
The film won the Golden Lion at the Venice Film Festival, where it received critical acclaim. Due to the rating, it only earned $4 million domestically. But it was much bigger overseas, where it earned $67 million worldwide, becoming the highest grossing NC-17 film (a record it still keeps).
  • Budget: $15,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $4,604,982.
  • Worldwide gross: $67,091,915.

Taking Woodstock (2009)

"Take the trip."
His 11th film. Based on the memoir by Elliot Tiber and Tom Monte, it stars Demetri Martin, Paul Dano, Dan Fogler, Henry Goodman, Jonathan Groff, Emile Hirsch, Eugene Levy, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Imelda Staunton and Liev Schreiber. Elliot's parents own a motel in Catskills, New York. To overcome the family's financial crisis, Elliot offers the organisers of the Woodstock music and art festival boarding and lodging in the motel.
The film received mixed reviews, and bombed at the box office.
  • Budget: $30,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $7,460,204.
  • Worldwide gross: $9,975,737.

Life of Pi (2012)

"Don't lose hope."
His 12th film. Based on the novel by Yann Martel, it stars Suraj Sharma, Irrfan Khan, Tabu, Rafe Spall, Gérard Depardieu and Adil Hussain. The storyline revolves around two survivors of a shipwreck who are on a lifeboat stranded in the Pacific Ocean for 227 days. One is a sixteen-year-old Indian boy named Pi Patel and the other is a ferocious Bengal tiger named Richard Parker.
Fox 2000 Pictures executive Elizabeth Gabler acquired the film rights in February 2003. M. Night Shyamalan was attached to direct, and he was expected to film it after The Village. But he dropped to instead make Lady in the Water, "I was hesitant [to direct] because the book has kind of a twist ending. And I was concerned that as soon as you put my name on it, everybody would have a different experience." Other directors considered were Alfonso Cuarón and Jean-Pierre Jeunet, both of which declined.
In 2009, Lee was hired, but the film was stuck in development hell when he asked for a $120 million budget. But the revival of 3-D motivated Fox in greenlighting the film under Lee's terms. As Lee started casting, one of the actors involved was Tobey Maguire, who would play a reporter. But it was later reported that Lee chose to cut his scenes, feeling he wanted to emphasize an entirely international cast. His scenes were re-shot with Rafe Spall.
Fox mounted an extensive marketing campaign selling the film as "the next Avatar" in terms of visuals and 3-D. And it fucking killed it at the box office. It earned $124.9 million domestically, which was considered a soft performance. But the real money was in the rest of the world; the film broke records in countries like China, United Kingdom, India and Mexico. It earned a colossal $609 million worldwide, easily becoming Lee's highest grossing film. An absolutely insane performance.
The film also received critical acclaim, praised for its CGI and 3-D. It received 11 Oscar nominations, including Best Picture. And it won four: Best Cinematography, Best Visual Effects, Best Original Score, and then Lee himself won his second Oscar for Best Director, becoming the first Asian to win the award twice. And just like that, he cemented himself as one of the greatest filmmakers of our era. And here's how he celebrated it; going to In-N-Out.
  • Budget: $120,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $124,987,023.
  • Worldwide gross: $609,016,565.

Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk (2016)

"To walk the path of a hero, you have to see how it all began."
His 13th film. Based on the novel by Ben Fountain, it stars Joe Alwyn, Garrett Hedlund, Kristen Stewart, Vin Diesel, Steve Martin, and Chris Tucker. After a horrifying battle in Iraq, Private Billy Lynn and his fellow comrades are brought home for a victory tour. Soon, he recollects the harsh realities of the war and struggles to cope with life.
The film used an unprecedented shooting and projection frame rate of 120 frames per second in 3D at 4K UHD resolution, which Lee terms the "whole shebang". It is the first feature film ever to be shot in such a high frame rate, over twice the previous record (Peter Jackson's The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, shot at 48 fps) and five times the standard speed of 24 fps. Lee undertook such a bold step after reading the book since he wanted the film to be an "immersive" and "realistic" experience of the reality and emotional journey of soldiers.
Due to the complexity involved in shooting at a very high frame rate, Lee could not afford to do many takes even for a single scene. Every shot was difficult and at the same time precious. He would rehearse every scene beforehand and would conduct regular morning meetings with the key crew members to highlight things they needed to be alert on. Shooting close-up shots in 3D with such high resolution meant the cast could not wear make-up and could not deliver less-than-authentic performances. Since no make-up was allowed, make-up artist Luisa Abel spent months of preparation on their skin tones. Throughout filming, the production team had to rethink everything, including different approaches to lighting as the camera needed extra lights due to the higher frame rates.
Due to the complexity of the film's unprecedented high frame rate and the cost of installing equipment capable of projecting the film in its intended format, only five theaters globally were equipped to show it at its highest resolution and maximum frame rate: two in the United States (one at a theater in New York City's AMC Lincoln Square where the film had its world premiere and the other in Los Angeles's the ArcLight Hollywood), and one theater each in Taipei, Beijing, and Shanghai.
The film opened in 2 theaters (New York City's AMC Lincoln Square and Los Angeles's the ArcLight Hollywood's Cinerama Dome), which were the only ones in the country to play the film at 120fps and the ticket prices at both locations running $20 or higher. It made a pretty great $114,129, which made for a fantastic $57,064 per-theater average (the third best of the year). But when it hit wide release, the film was dead on arrival. It made just $901,062 in 1,176 theaters, which was one of the worst wide debuts ever. And then, despite having its second weekend fall on Thanksgiving, it collapsed by 77.3%. It closed after just 3 weeks with only $1.7 million domestically. It fared better overseas, where China made colossal $23.7 million. Worldwide, it made just $30.9 million, making it a box office flop. Reviews were mixed, and people were polarized over the high-frame rate; some deemed it immersive and impressive, while others found it distracting and flat.
  • Budget: $30,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $1,738,477.
  • Worldwide gross: $30,930,984.

Gemini Man (2019)

"Who will save you from yourself?"
His 14th film. It stars Will Smith, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Clive Owen and Benedict Wong. The film follows a retiring Force Recon Marine scout sniper who is targeted by a much younger clone of himself while on the run from a corrupt private military company.
In 1997, Darren Lemke sold his pitch for Gemini Man after impressing Don Murphy with an unproduced spec script. Warner Bros. Pictures pursued the project, but Walt Disney Pictures ultimately won out and Tony Scott would become attached to direct. Complications soon arose when the studio were planning how to make the film. The producers toyed with the idea of an actor play both roles through the use of visual effects, but Scott moved on from the film before any progress could be made.
The project was stuck in development hell, and saw many actors considered, such as Mel Gibson, Harrison Ford, Chris O'Donnell, Nicolas Cage, Sean Connery, Clint Eastwood and Jon Voight. Many directors were also considered, before Lee finally signed in 2017, with Smith also joining. Like his previous film, the film was shot digitally at an extra-high frame rate of 120 frames per second (fps), modified for 3D, this time on modified ARRI Alexa cameras mounted on STEREOTEC 3D Rigs.
Again, due to the requirements needed, only 14 theaters in North America could show the film at a 120fps 2K 3D high-frame rate (two in Los Angeles, two in Chicago, and one each in Miami, Orlando, New Orleans, Denver, New York, San Francisco, Atlanta, Las Vegas, Baltimore and Houston). Even then, the film was shot at 120fps 4K 3D, which means no theater showed its intended vision. Lee said that 120fps 2K 3D felt like the necessary avenue to make “Junior,” Smith’s digital avatar, a soulful character who could also appear to beat the living crap out of a real actor in the film’s many fight sequences.
The film received negative reviews, particularly for its CGI and story. And like his previous film, the high-frame rate received polarizing reactions. Despite the presence of a big star like Will Smith, the film flopped with just $173 million worldwide, against its $138 million budget, and losing an estimated $111 million for Paramount. Lee's attempt at high-frame rate was just not clicking with the public.
  • Budget: $138,000,000.
  • Domestic gross: $48,546,770.
  • Worldwide gross: $173,469,516.

The Future

His next film, as confirmed in November 2022, is a Bruce Lee biopic. The lead actor will be Mason Lee, Ang's son. And he suggested he's not done with the 120fps high-frame rate, claiming he would continue using it in his next film for action sequences.

MOVIES (FROM HIGHEST GROSSING TO LEAST GROSSING)

No. Movie Year Studio Domestic Total Overseas Total Worldwide Total Budget
1 Life of Pi 2012 20th Century Fox $124,987,023 $484,029,542 $609,016,565 $120M
2 Hulk 2003 Universal $132,177,234 $113,107,931 $245,285,165 $137M
3 Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon 2000 Sony $128,530,421 $85,446,864 $213,978,518 $17M
4 Brokeback Mountain 2005 Focus Features $83,043,761 $95,019,405 $178,064,141 $14M
5 Gemini Man 2019 Paramount $48,546,770 $124,922,746 $173,469,516 $138M
6 Sense and Sensibility 1995 Sony $43,182,776 $91,400,000 $134,582,776 $16M
7 Lust, Caution 2007 Focus Features $4,604,982 $62,486,933 $67,091,915 $15M
8 Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk 2016 Sony $1,738,477 $29,192,507 $30,930,984 $30M
9 Eat Drink Man Woman 1994 The Samuel Goldwyn Company $7,294,403 $17,000,000 $24,294,403 N/A
10 The Wedding Banquet 1993 The Samuel Goldwyn Company $6,933,459 $16,700,000 $23,633,459 $1M
11 The Ice Storm 1997 20th Century Fox / Disney $8,038,061 $7,973,914 $16,011,975 $18M
12 Taking Woodstock 2009 Focus Features $7,460,204 $2,515,533 $9,975,737 $30M
13 Ride with the Devil 1999 USA Films $635,096 $0 $635,096 $38M
14 Pushing Hands 1991 Lionsgate $152,322 $0 $152,322 N/A
Across 14 films, he has made $1,727,122,572 worldwide. That's $123,365,898 per film.

The Verdict

Despite his past two films getting two of the worst reviews in his career, Lee has proved himself to be a very reliable director.
Something impressive about him is the versatility in his resume. A comic book film, a survival film, a LGBT film, a wuxia film, a sci-fi film, a post-war film, a Jane Austen film, a noir film, an erotic NC-17 thriller, a Western, and some romantic comedies. Even if some don't fully work, there's still some good and interesting aspects in him. And of course, the first Asian director to win 2 Oscars for Best Director. So if he wants to continue with the controversial 120fps high-frame rate, let him cook. Hopefully in more and more theaters worldwide.
Hope you liked this edition. You can find this and more in the wiki for this section.
The next director will be Zack Snyder. Oh boy. This is where the fun begins.
I asked you to choose who else should be in the run and the comment with the most upvotes would be chosen. Well, we'll later talk about... John McTiernan and Rob Reiner. Whaaaaat? Two posts for the price of one? You're welcome! It was a very tight race, and it was tough to choose one or the other. The former has the dishonor of going to director jail and real jail, while the latter had an incredible run before completely crashing with one of Roger Ebert's most hated films.
This is the schedule for the following four:
Week Director Reasoning
June 10-16 Zack Snyder RIP Inbox.
June 17-23 Tony Scott Action films have not been the same ever since his death.
June 24-30 Roland Emmerich The King of disaster films.
July 1-7 John McTiernan & Rob Reiner The rise and fall of two once-great directors.
Who should be next after McTiernan and Reiner? That's up to you.
submitted by SanderSo47 to boxoffice [link] [comments]


2024.06.08 17:52 Superteletubbies64 [H] Lots of games [W] Paypal EU, Grindstone, American Arcadia, En Garde!, Nuclear Blaze, Turok 3, Undernauts: Labyrinth of Yomi, Lego Harry Potter Years 1-4, 5-7, Strayed Lights, Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy, No Longer Home, Shemune I & II

Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers and the games in the title, unlikely to take offers for anything else atm.
If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers. If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
submitted by Superteletubbies64 to GameTrade [link] [comments]


2024.06.08 17:52 Superteletubbies64 [H] Lots of games [W] Paypal EU, Grindstone, American Arcadia, En Garde!, Nuclear Blaze, Turok 3, Undernauts: Labyrinth of Yomi, Lego Harry Potter Years 1-4, 5-7, Strayed Lights, Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy, No Longer Home, Shemune I & II

Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers and the games in the title, unlikely to take offers for anything else atm.
If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers. If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
submitted by Superteletubbies64 to indiegameswap [link] [comments]


2024.06.08 17:52 Superteletubbies64 [H] Lots of games [W] Paypal EU, Grindstone, American Arcadia, En Garde!, Nuclear Blaze, Turok 3, Undernauts: Labyrinth of Yomi, Lego Harry Potter Years 1-4, 5-7, Strayed Lights, Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy, No Longer Home, Shemune I & II

Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers and the games in the title, unlikely to take offers for anything else atm.
If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers. If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
submitted by Superteletubbies64 to SteamGameSwap [link] [comments]


2024.06.08 13:16 xiaolii [H] Lots of Games [W] Trade for Games or Paypal (EU)

Last Updated List: 08/06/2024
 
I'm primarily looking to trade for games from my wishlist, otherwise I am also open to selling them. I am not interested in games I already have and all games I'm getting are for me and activated on my own account. Other than that feel free to offer your list of Steam games and something I may not have and fulfills my criteria I could/would be willing to trade for it/them.
If you're either trading or buying please state the game(s) you are interested in and your offer (game(s)/list/price).
 
Info:
 
I kindly ask of you is to be reasonable when making offers to make it a fair trade for both of us.
Let's have a good exchange/trade!
 
List of games:
submitted by xiaolii to GameTrade [link] [comments]


2024.06.08 13:16 xiaolii [H] Lots of Games [W] Trade for Games or Paypal (EU)

Last Updated List: 08/06/2024
 
I'm primarily looking to trade for games from my wishlist, otherwise I am also open to selling them. I am not interested in games I already have and all games I'm getting are for me and activated on my own account. Other than that feel free to offer your list of Steam games and something I may not have and fulfills my criteria I could/would be willing to trade for it/them.
If you're either trading or buying please state the game(s) you are interested in and your offer (game(s)/list/price).
 
Info:
 
I kindly ask of you is to be reasonable when making offers to make it a fair trade for both of us.
Let's have a good exchange/trade!
 
List of games:
submitted by xiaolii to indiegameswap [link] [comments]


2024.06.08 01:47 Dicerson1 Air Hard - Part 2

Part 1
They're all going to die. The captain was right, this ship is our ticket out of here. No more subsisting on stupid algae rations. Fresh meat, Finally! I hope they have some Freeanas. They taste just like my favorite snack back home on Grobblum. I remember learning how to leap from the methane pools fast enough to catch the tiny flying things off-guard. I loved the snap of their brittle bones, so when I learned there was an entire species of giant ones? Heheheheh...
The blood-scent on this vessel is strong. The boarding latch hasn't even opened yet and I can already feel the bloodlust taking hold. My buddies besides me are all itchin' to go- but I ain't second captain for nothin'. I gotta make sure to keep 'em in line- so they tear apart the enemies instead of each other. Especially since we're all starvin'.
"REMEMBER, SPAWNLINGS! WE'RE HERE FOR THE SHIP, NOT THE STUPID SCIENTISTS ON IT. TEAR 'EM APART BUT LEAVE THE TECH INTACT. ANY OF YOU THE SCRATCH THE FURNITURE WILL FEEL MY TEETH, GOT IT?"
The roared in unison. Good. Morale is always key. The latch opens as their vessel finishes repressurizing, tearing open the secondary bulkhead like dry kelp and creating a new opening for us. Stupid Florbulan ships, they think their fancy redundant systems can stop Grobulans? Hah! They can add as many extra walls as they want, we'll just add more boom.
Time to go. I lead the charge, of course, and start tearing into the first Florb I see. Soft and chewy, but I ain't a fan of their blood. Too acidic. I leave 'em to the boys and pull a couple with me to go deeper in. Down the hall is a few more, I want to save bloodying my hands for the first Freeana I see so I fire a shot from the photon caster instead and let one of the boys I took handle the rest. I turn down the hall, and the other boy is already at a tear. Suddenly, a different Grobulan leaps from a doorway and the two start tearing into each other.
"Heh heh heh, look what we have here. BOYS! GET OUT HERE! LOOKS LIKE TODAYS A LUCKY DAY! WE GET TO EAT TRAITOR TONIGHT!" I bellow to the others behind me. They start pouring out of the room, leaving the half-dead Florbs to rot. Every Grobulan worth their teeth knows the name Hark Manyfred. Son of the Traitor King. Disgrace to every Grobulan in the galaxy. Figures he's here, on some no-name explorer vessel. Not even the Florbs want him doing anything important. Serves the trash right for what his fool of a father did. That war was as good as won, all we had to do was execute that filth of a mate and her treasonous pacifism. That would've set the bastards priorities straight, make it so he didn't surrender to these pathetic chew toys. Force the rest of us loyal Grobulans into hiding. Not that we mind the Pirates life, its more natural anyways. But it still sucks having to spend months or years on algae rations between hits.
After the traitor lept out the doorway, something else stepped in after him. A weird thing I'd never seen before. Must be one of the Combine's new races. We'd been stuck out in deep space a few years, haven't exactly been able to keep up to date on news. Good. I get to be the first Grobulan to taste new meat. What's the thing its holding? Doesn't look like a Photon caster. Must be some new tech? Or maybe something its people made. Who knows, who cares?
"Stop! Don't come closer or I'll shoot!" It bellowed. Translators still working? Stupid gunman missed. That shot was supposed to take out their computer core. Maybe its another of the Florbs stupid redundancies. Whatever, bloodlust is getting tougher to handle. I need me some RED.
Not good. Not good. Not good. Shark people don't respond to intimidation. Fuck. Of course the pirates also have to be homicidal maniacs. The things fast too, practically swimming through the air- and while I'd love to appreciate the majesty of a flying great white right now that thing is coming this way and I'm pretty sure its looking at me. I look to Hark but he's busy with another of the Pirates. I heard once that sharks go away if you hit them on the nose, I know the airsoft gun probably isn't much, but if I pelt him in the face a few times maybe it'll stun him a bit? Don't know, but I have to try cuz running in this low gravity isn't gonna work.
BOOM. SQUELCH.
Holy fucking shit. What the hell? He just... he just exploded!? Eugh, and that smell. Its like someone just turned on a stove. What the hell are these guys made of, fucking methane? Whatever, I look behind me just to make sure there wasn't some other guy with a gun or whatever. Nope. Nada. That shark just exploded cuz of an airsoft BB and I'm not in a position to start questioning things when there's a second one that looks like its decided I'm a bigger threat than Hark. After a very brief moment of shock from the sudden detonation, it and I lock eyes and it leaps at me. I panic and pull the triger again, spraying bbs down the hallway all the while and catching some other shark people that happened to be behind that first one. One of them scrapes the thing's arm, and it just blows off like I hit him with a twelve gauge. He goes careening into the wall and splats like a water balloon. More of that disgusting smell, and all the blood. I actually end up vomiting, and watch in horror as it sizzles on what's left of the dead shark guy's skin. Burns right through it like I'm a fucking xenomorph or something.
I look to Hark, and I may not be an expert of Shark social skills but I'm pretty sure he's shitting himself right now. God, to him I must look like I was plucked straight out of a horror movie. He probably expects me to whip out a knife tail or laser eyes or something. I look to my right to see Doc Oc again, and he's an even deeper shade of outright purple now. Almost black. I hear more shouts, more of those shark things start pouring out of the doorway the first ones came from. One of them is holding another octopus looking person in... christ in his teeth.
We're all going to die. But not to the Grobulans like I originally thought. This creature calling itself Duncan has just reduced, and is still reducing, the Grobulan pirates that have boarded the vessel to... paste. That 'toy' of its is quite literally making them explode. And I'm pretty sure it just spat acid venom at one to make sure it was dead. I was wrong, this is not a soldier. This must be some kind of gene-augmented bioweapon, bred for war. The fact that it hasn't already killed us is either a sign that some command trigger hadn't flipped until combat began or some other control mechanism that might be malfunctioning- or perhaps not malfunctioning. Whatever the case, it doesn't seem interested in either me or Lieutenant Hark, and I aim to keep it that way by pulling Hark into back into my office so I can work on the injuries he sustained from his brief scuffle. Pretty bad, from the looks of it. Several tears, a couple torn ligaments. One of his cartilage support structures is snapped in half. All I can hear from the hallway now is shouting, and that horrid noise its weapon makes. A high pitched whine, a handful of strange plinks, and the nausea-inducing squelch of a... of a detonating Grobulan. Whatever that weapon is, its more powerful than any I have ever seen or even heard of. At least as far as handheld firearms are concerned. The fact that its people has developed such weaponry before even achieving spaceflight is a testament to what is undoubtedly a violent, warlike nature. No wonder it seemed so concerned that Dr. Tryn had accessed their communications, it must have thought we were trying to conduct military espionage. I shudder to think what it would have done if the doctor hadn't been quick to assuage its worries. It could well be me painted on the wall right now...
I decided it was better to focus on Hark's injuries, than to speculate about my brush with death.
This is sickening. I thought that living out a sci-fi novel, killing goons and pirates with some weird super power or super weapon might be kind of neat, fun even. But right now all I want to do is go home and pretend like this never happened. But I can't. Something about seeing all the... blood up close. Hearing those screams. No actor can do a genuine death cry, and let me tell you the real thing tickles something fucking awful deep in my brain. Even if its from an alien instead of a, well human I guess. They're people, too, afterall. From all the dead uh, octopus people- mental note, ask Doc Oc what his people are called- its clear what's gonna happen if I even entertain the idea of surrender. These shark people don't leave prisoners, and if they did they'd probably have a different, more culinary, term for them.
Calling upon my years of... airsoft experience... I start clearing the hallway. Check corners, double-checking rooms, making sure I don't miss anything. There's a few more of those bird-fish people, cowering along with a handful of other strange aliens I've not seen before. More octopi, a few eel-looking ones, a literal man-sized starfish. Man, aside from the bird-fish all of them look like they come from the ocean. Are there any terrestrial species aboard? Maybe its a special ship or something.
Eventually, I hear a weird thunk and the entire ship seems to lurch. Then the Alexa in the walls says, "BREACH SEALED. 1 INTRUDER DETECTED. YELLOW ALERT."
"Sounds like its over mostly, I'm sure the ship has other soldiers on it to take care of the last guy. Now, back to uh... where... fuck. I have no idea where I'm at." I turn around, to find the hallway behind me now blocked by 2 eel-like aliens, wielding more of those banana shaped weapons- pointed at me. Shit.
I put my hands up, and drop my weapon- letting the band on it hang it by my shoulder, "Hey heyyyy.. it's alright. I'm friendly, I'm on your side, I helped uh... well, you can see for yourself." I gestured to the trail of... corpses. God. I left a trail of corpses. Fuck me. When I get back, I'm gonna have one hell of a story for my therapist.
"I am well aware of your actions today, sir... Duncan Euler, is it? Doctor Ruffaloo informed me of your... abilities," A voice from behind me, very soft. I turn around and... huh. This one looks sort of like one of those bird-fish people, but much... taller? More like a stork or a flamingo, where the other ones looked sort of like shiny pidgeons with gills. Given the voice, must be some kind of sexual dimorphism? Weird. She- or he? I don't know. They seem to also be actually dressed, admittedly with ribbons and medals instead of clothes, but I guess that's how it goes when you're people are all feathered. No need to add more coverings.
"Uh, ohkay. Look, I didn-" She raised a hand, or wing I guess.
"Its alright. I'm not about to interrogate the one responsible for saving my vessel about his people's military technology or strategies. From the security footage, its clear that you are no uncontrolled murder machine like our good Doctor seemed so worried about. You very much seem in control, and have gone to effort to target only the pirates who boarded my ship," she explains.
Her ship? So she's the captain then. Alright, cool, so I can just tell her what's going on, have her take me back to my planet and get her in contact with some way more qualified than me for something as big as first contact and then I can go home and forget about all of this.
"Oh, good, that's great. So, listen, I-" she raises a wing again.
"I'm sure you want to go home so you can report about this to your superiors. But, unfortunately, that is not currently possible. According to Protocol, first contact with a new species requires a thorough investigation of the prospective member species before making contact through official channels to prevent the spread of novel diseases or aid in application of species-unique accomodations; and of course to ensure our translators are functioning correctly so that there are no communicative misunderstandings. Normally this would be done at a great distance, and if any form of physical exam was conducted the individual would be sedated the entire time and returned in the same condition they were taken before any could notice. However, Lieutenant Hark broke protocol during his scouting assignment in an attempt to save your life. And while admirable, it has left us in a rather awkward position. I must thank you for saving my vessel, but unfortunately I cannot allow you to return to your planet before an official first contact is made. In the meantime, I'm sure the Combine would be more than happy to provide you any accomodation you desir-"
I raise my airsoft rifle, directly at her. I hear a few clicks from behind me, and quickly realize what my anger and adrenaline have made me do. I prepare to face death, but instead only hear gasps of.. horror? I flick around to see what's happened, only to find that the guards behind me are shining... laser pointers? Had to cover my eyes a bit but... yeah. Its just laser pointers. They're a little hot, I guess. But, not like "light me on fire" hot or anything.
"Hey! Be careful where you point those laser sights you have on your guns, you could blind someone! Or... well, I guess you wouldn't care about blinding someone you're about to kill, but still! That could hurt!"
I hear the captain lady's voice again, though its a hoarse whisper of abject shock.
"Those aren't laser sights. Those are Photon Casters. The deadliest handheld firearm that can be safely used aboard a spaceborne vessel. And you... you're just... immune? Do- do you even feel them?"
"Uh, well, they're a little hot I guess. Might be able to cook a chicken with one if you held it long enough." I said, unconsciously cracking a joke to take the edge off the fact that I was apparently about to be executed just to keep me quiet.
"A little hot? Sir Duncan those are- well, I don't know what measurement your people use and I'm sure the Translator doesn't either. But I assure you they would normally be extremely painful at the least, and if held could kill in just a few moments. I also don't know what a chicken is, but if takes more than this to 'cook' them then it must be quite the formiddable beast," She explains, her voice stern with amazement.
I can't help but chuckle at the idea of a chicken being formiddable, but it only ends up scaring the piss out of everyone around me. Fuck. 'The monster learns its invulnerable to its victims weapons, and chuckles menacingly'. Well, maybe I could turn this to my advantage.
"Take me back. Now." I say, in the deepest, most intimidating tone I could muster. Making sure the Captain is staring directly down the orange barrel of my apparently-lethal airsoft gun.
----
How did things come to this. First Lieutenant Hark disobeys a direct order, and though it is admirable to want to save a life, it is unimaginably reckless when it involves breaking first contact protocol. What happens if this "Duncan"'s family notices its absence? What if Hark's little escapade was noticed by local authorities? There's no telling how many things could have or indeed did go wrong at the very outset, and now here I am being threatened into making matters worse by the very individual Hark saved and who saved my own vessel from Grobulan pirates. Not even the Songs can tell where they came from, or why they were this deep in unexplored space. I've heard tales of Pirates living away from the Hyperlanes, but I didn't think they could be this far out.
In any case, what am I to do? Clearly this individual is attempting to reconnoiter with its military to report on the existence of extraterrestrial threats. There's no telling how this will paint first contact- it could even lead to another Cold War like with the Grobulan Empire; which ended in the obvious fashion. Thankfully their King had a sympathetic consort, and it was thanks only to her sacrifice that the war was ended before anyone went extinct. I'm sure the councilmen would prefer to avoid a repeat of these events. As would I, considering the death toll of that conflict. It may be futile, but I must try to negotiate- even if it results in my own death.
"Sir Duncan, I am sorry but I cannot do that. If your people learn of extraterrestrial life in uncontrolled conditions, it could cause mass panic, or worse, outright war. It is not unheard of for a civilization to over-react to the notion of extraterrestrials and end up running itself extinct over differences of opinion regarding how to move forward. Moreover, if you tell your superiors of what happened here they may be inclined to believe that extraterrestrials in general are a threat- which would hamper peace talks intending to offer them the protection of the Florbus Combine. Our goal is to ensure peace and cooperation between as many species as possible, for the betterment of all. But if a world is closed off and xenophobic, it can result in far worse conflicts than what has happened aboard this vessel. It is in everyone's best interest that we follow protocol, and ensure a smooth first contact with your world's governing bodies. To give them time to process the information before making it public knowledge and potentially causing chaos and, thereby, death. I do not see in you a heartless monster, if you were you would have killed my own people indiscriminately alongside the Grobulans."
If this does not sway it, then nothing can. I may be forced to scuttle. Better us to burn than entire planets.
----
Fuck. She saw right through me. In hindsight, threatening the captain of a military vessel would never have ended well anyways. They might have tried something insane. Especially since she's still convinced that I am a military man myself. My dad may have been, but I definitely am not. I like airsoft, sure, and I do enjoy occasionally watching videos of airsoft pros wiping the floor with military tactics. But I grew up with my mother never knowing if my Dad was going to come back or not. Too many tearful reunions, too many moments seeing the dead look in his eyes or overhearing him talk in his sleep. PTSD is a hell of a thing, and it seems I'm gonna end up with some of it myself after this.
The worst thing is she's right. If I go back, there's no way I couldn't at least tell mom- she'd notice something was wrong and find a way to force it out of me. Then she might tell Dad, and Dad really is a military man and there's no way he wouldn't tell one of his friends still in the military and then it all goes downhill from there. I lower the gun again, dropping it entirely this time and letting it hang loosely by the band. I end up taking a seat in the hallway as the adrenaline finally turns off and exhaustion hits me.
"Ugh... fine. You're right. It was selfish of me to try and force it. I just want to go home, man. I... I killed people today..." I sigh in resignation.
She gives me a confused look, "Is... that not your profession as a Soldier?"
I tilt my head back against the wall lazily, giving her just the side of my eye, "I tried to tell Doc Oc- er, uhm, Doctor Ruffaloo, that I'm not a soldier. Then those uhm, what did you call them?"
She answers tertly to allow me to continue smoothly, "Grobulans."
"Grobulans, right, Shark people. The Grobulans attacked. And like I was about to say just now, I didn't know my airsoft gun could even do that. It's a toy, I mean, watch-" I took it and quickly shot it at my arm, it stung a bit, but it was nothing much. Everyone else though looked in shock as I did it, several of them gasped and I'm pretty sure Doc O- Dr. Ruffaloo fainted. I think, he just sort of squished into the floor so its kind of hard to tell. But when they saw it do absolutely nothing they all relaxed a little.
"Well, I'm sure its a Toy to your people. But, at least to the Grobulans, its a lethal weapon of unimaginable proportions. Though, if it truly is just a toy, I hope you wouldn't mind me asking: What is 'airsoft'?" Oh boy.
"Uhm, its well... I hope the translator doesn't garble this. It's just a thing made to look like a gun- er, a real weapon except for the orange barrel which is the legal requirement to identify it as a toy. But instead of firing bullets-" I begin to explain.
"Bullets?" She interrupts
"Oh, uhm, actually deadly projectiles. Your doctor there pulled one out of me while I was out cold, I think. Some maniac brought a real gun to the airsoft field and, uh yeah. Fuck, that means I'm missing. There's no way they aren't gonna put out a search party for me, especially since that asshole fired a real fucking gun. God, my mom is gonna be devastated..." I sink low as reality hits me. Everyone I know is going to think that I'm dead, and I can't go back to tell them I'm not because if I do it could end up causing global panic or even war. Lord knows what China might do if they thought America was getting the upperhand in xeno-negotiations.
"Apologies, Sir Duncan," she said, "I did not mean to-"
My turn to interrupt, "Its alright. Not your fault, technically. I mean, if not for Hark I might really be dead so, I guess it doesn't really change much. I just get to be up here wallowing about it instead of in heaven."
"Heaven?" Oops. God, I really am not cut out for this first contact thing. Gonna be here for hours going down tangents cuz of me and my insatiable need for metaphor.
"Uh, my people's idea of an afterlife. The idea is that when we die, good people go up to Heaven to live in eternal paradise and bad people go to Hell to live in eternal punishment. I mean, there's a bit more nuance than that but I'm not a particularly religious person so I'm not exactly the one to talk to about it." I explained.
"I... see. Your people have quite unique beliefs. In any case, you were saying about what it is that 'toy' fires?" Thank god she can deal with my tangents.
"Yes, right. Uh, we call them BBs. Not a clue what it stands for, but its just a really tiny plastic sphere. Not really aerodynamic or anything, but that's sort of the point. The point is to be nonlethal. Its specifically design to not kill, just sting a little. I have no idea why its so... effective against the shark people. Sorry, uhm, Grobulans." I finally finished elaborating.
"Its quite alright, I imagine. They're not a particularly well liked sort, especially amongst my people, the Freeanas. Except for lieutenant Hark Manyfred, the one who saved you, most of them are vicious murderers and monstrous cannibals. I'm not particularly fond of applying racial stereotypes so generically, but in this case it really is difficult not to. Lieutenant Hark is an example of the more civilized Grobulans attempts at clearing their reputation. Though I'm not sure why they would assign him to my vessel. In any case, politics is not the matter at hand. What we must do now is finish assessing the damage and plot a return route back to Florbus space," She begins to nod and issue commands to the guards around me, I break into small laughter.
"Is something the matter, Sir Duncan? The translator isn't interpreting those noises, are you injured?" She worries
"Oh, no, its laughter. Uhm, a reaction to funny stuff. Sorry, I know things are serious and all but... Florbus? That's the name of the big alien empire? I just... sorry I can't..." I don't know why its suddenly so funny to me now, I guess I didn't really recognize it when that first uh 'Freeana' was telling me about them earlier. Florbus? It sounds like exactly the kind of weird madeup name a 70s or 80s sci-fi comic author would use. Or a modern one writing a parody. Speaking of, so is Grobulan. I mean, it rhymes with Romulan so I guess thats why my brain didn't quite register it as silly. Those guys are serious stuff!
----
My people's brains do not go unconscious, except for when we die. But we do have a response when stress becomes simply too much. All of our muscles go lax, and our entire body melts into a puddle like slop since we do not have any form of internal supports. The crea- or, I suppose I should call it "Duncan", is terrifying beyond imagination. Immune to Photon casters, but more than that to its own lethal weapon. And, apparently, this weapon is considered by his people to be a toy. I can scarcely imagine what genuine weapons are to them, though that "bullet" I pulled out of him appears to be a clue. It takes me nearly 15 minutes to restore function to my nerve endings and regain my form. While I was incapacitated, Captain Ashala gave me my orders.
"Doctor Ruffaloo, you are to attend to our guest and make sure he is not suffering internal injuries. According to the reports, you are now this vessel's most qualified science officer. Congratulations, Director Ruffaloo, on your promotion. In addition to your duties as the ship's primary physician, I also want you to investigate the matter of these 'BB's the Duncan's airsoft weapon fires. I suspect the lethality may be biological in nature, considering they do not seem to carry much in the way of physical force nor detonate on impact with other surfaces."
Of course. Dr. Tryn... and Saint Florb knows how many others amongst the science crew. Though reluctant I am to interact further with the Duncan, I have duties and I must perform them. It could be the difference between life or death for many.
----
Back at Dr. Ruffaloo's office. I'm really feeling it now. Definitely got a bruise from that initial explosion, and its really starting to smart. King Shark is here too, and man is he beat up. That other, uh, Grobulan really tore into him. And I'm pretty sure I heard the big one I shot first say something about a 'Eating Traitor'. So I can guess what his story is. Man, to think racism was a thing in space- though I guess when you literally are different species its probably an easier trap to fall into. I can't help but feel bad for the guy, especially since he's apparently the one who saved me from death by gun-shot to the femeral artery. That's definitely where I got hit, now that I have a calm moment I can remember it clearly. Isaiah was looking shifty from the moment he showed up at the field, and I remember the argument he got into with Isabelle last time, so I decided to confront him to make sure he wasn't going to try anything stupid.
And boy, was I right. Mother fucker brought a god damn gun, and was planning to kill me specifically. Apparently he thinks I 'stole' Isabelle from him, and thought that killing me would somehow make her fall in love with him again. Fucking psychopath. She dumped him precisely because he was a fucked up control freak, and I just happened to be there for her when she needed comfort instead of scolding about the color of her jacket or hair. God, Isabelle is gonna be devastated, too. We had been dating for nearly a year at that point... man, I really, really need this first contact shit to happen as fast as possible. I just hope that when I get back they'll be there for me. I've seen the movies where this kind of thing happens. Man gets into accident, far from home. Ends up lost for years and by the time he gets back everyone else in his life has moved on and doesn't care anymore, usually with living parents no-longer-living or somehow resentful. If I end up going back to that...
I shook the thought. There's nothing I can do about it except make sure the captain's protocols go off without a hitch and in as much haste as can be garnered. I let the doctor look over me, and sure enough there's one hell of a bruise. He asks me if I'm alright, and I tell him its just a bruise. He turns white as snow and asks, with what sounds like extreme concern in his- or I guess the translators- voice, "The... uhm, Translator is interpreting that word as 'Internal Bleeding'. Is that correct?"
"Well, I guess, yeah, technically," I state plainly.
"HOW ARE YOU ALIVE RIGHT NOW?" He practically screams, before squishing back into the floor like he did earlier.
It takes nearly 5 straight minutes of me explaining a few basics about human anatomy, kinda stuff even highschoolers know about, before he finally un-squishes from the floor. I ask about that, and apparently its his people's stress response. Kind of cute, but also concerning. If you end up paralyzing yourself if sometimes spooks you particularly badly, that can't possibly go well. He says it was apparently some kind of evolutionary advantage on his homeworld, because it would make them seem dead and most predators often ignored dead things and most scavengers would quickly realize that the thing wasn't dead before any real damage was dealt. Weird.
From what I can gather during our conversation, aliens in general are built pretty poorly. The ocean animal thing? Yeah, thats no coincidence. Apparently the vast majority of life in the galaxy is aquatic in some fashion, and usually evolve into semi-aquatic or even amphibious by the time they develop tools and the like. Only a bare handful, such as the avian Freeanas, end up departing from the water entirely- and even then are often still mostly coastal or prefer to live near bodies of water for ease of hunting. Makes sense, even humans tended to found cities alongside rivers and other water sources. In any case, when you take a fish out of water it tends to be very squishy. And although most people have gene mods that let them exist without being submerged- mostly because water and other fluid mediums are extremely heavy and thus expensive to haul around in spaceships- mods that enhance durability or strength are heavily restricted and available only to military personnel.
"Speaking of, I couldn't help but notice that your internal supports are particularly dense and tough to analyze with my equipment. Do Duncans not restrict genemods like the we do?" He asks. I can't help but chuckle a bit.
"First off, my name is Duncan. My species is Human. Second off, we don't have genemods. Not yet, anyways- last I heard that kind of stuff isn't even prototypable, at least not in humans. Best we've got are bacteria that help in chemical synthesis,"
He squishes into the floor again. This is gonna be a long day.
--End of Part 2--
submitted by Dicerson1 to humansarespaceorcs [link] [comments]


2024.06.07 23:44 awfulthings [H] Steam Games 2

submitted by awfulthings to u/awfulthings [link] [comments]


2024.06.07 22:45 Angelcuddly How do you the decision when dating about when to notify prospects that you're getting serious with someone else?

make* the
I kinda feel this pressure, kinda before I even met the person, to choose. There was a guy, let's call Alexa lol, with whom I've been gradually talking with online for maybe a month now. Though due to things going haywire in my life and having a lot of things to deal with, we fell out of touch for a little while too. I guess maybe he also had stuff going on.
Anyway, he got back in contact and things settled more for me. So I decided to go through with talking with him. Numbers have now been exchanged which might result in meeting not too long from now, that's if my short hair doesn't scare him off when we video call lol. Cause I don't really feel I look my best with it. Although pretty sure I also have a photo or two with short hair there too. So it'd not really be catfishing lol. Plus I'm regrowing so I want it longer ultimately.
Anyway I went off topic a little lol. I mean, we could video call and that could end up being the end. So I might be getting ahead of myself and need to just let things fall as they may.
Around that time we've been out of contact, I also met a guy randomly in person who I've a slight suspicion likes me, I feel similarly despite our differing value system. Although we live close to each other and might cross paths again, we've not yet exchanged contact. My concern is, what if I meet Alex and we seem to get further before I see this other guy. Then this other guy enters the picture. I just feel like I'd prefer to give them both a fair chance at getting to know and also be more clear about my feelings. I also don't want to miss the opportunity by disconnecting from one before I even really know the other is more or less in line with what I'm looking for.
I'm new to dating too, so not really sure how to handle this kinda situation. I want to be fair to Alex too and not make him feel led on. So what are your experiences with handling this type of thing?
I'm not too concerned about how to voice those things or reject someone, I'm assertive and can do that. Just not sure how to put my worries at ease.
submitted by Angelcuddly to AskWomenOver30 [link] [comments]


2024.06.07 21:37 Superteletubbies64 [H] Lots of games [W] Paypal EU, Asterigos, Grindstone, American Arcadia, En Garde!, Nuclear Blaze, Turok 3, Undernauts: Labyrinth of Yomi, Lego Harry Potter Years 1-4, 5-7, Strayed Lights, Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy, No Longer Home, Shemune I & II

Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers and the games in the title, unlikely to take offers for anything else atm.
If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers. If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
submitted by Superteletubbies64 to GameTrade [link] [comments]


2024.06.07 21:37 Superteletubbies64 [H] Lots of games [W] Paypal EU, Asterigos, Grindstone, American Arcadia, En Garde!, Nuclear Blaze, Turok 3, Undernauts: Labyrinth of Yomi, Lego Harry Potter Years 1-4, 5-7, Strayed Lights, Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy, No Longer Home, Shemune I & II

Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers and the games in the title, unlikely to take offers for anything else atm.
If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers. If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
submitted by Superteletubbies64 to indiegameswap [link] [comments]


2024.06.07 21:37 Superteletubbies64 [H] Lots of games [W] Paypal EU, Asterigos, Grindstone, American Arcadia, En Garde!, Nuclear Blaze, Turok 3, Undernauts: Labyrinth of Yomi, Lego Harry Potter Years 1-4, 5-7, Strayed Lights, Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy, No Longer Home, Shemune I & II

Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers and the games in the title, unlikely to take offers for anything else atm.
If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers. If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
submitted by Superteletubbies64 to SteamGameSwap [link] [comments]


2024.06.07 05:26 Sweet-Count2557 Best Family Resorts Bermuda

Best Family Resorts Bermuda
Best Family Resorts Bermuda Looking for the perfect family-friendly getaway in Bermuda? Well, we've got you covered!In this article, we'll be exploring the best family resorts Bermuda has to offer. From stunning beachfront locations to luxurious accommodations, these resorts have it all.With a wide range of activities for all ages, your whole family will have a blast.So, get ready to relax, have fun, and create unforgettable memories at these amazing family resorts in Bermuda.Key TakeawaysThe Reefs Resort & Club offers a stunning location and exclusive amenities, but it may be more expensive and has had some issues with room amenities.Grotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa has a unique cave experience and offers an all-inclusive option, but the rooms may be outdated.Pompano Beach Club has a beautiful beachfront location and offers family-friendly activities, but it is in a more secluded area and has limited entertainment.Fairmont Southampton is a luxury 5-star resort with a variety of dining options and activities for all ages, and it is conveniently located on the South Shore with beautiful views.The Reefs Resort & Club: Kid-friendly Activities, Family Accommodations, Dining Options, Safety and Security, Value for MoneyWe found that The Reefs Resort & Club offers excellent kid-friendly activities, family accommodations, dining options, safety and security, and value for money, making it a top choice for families.Situated on a picturesque cliffside, guests can enjoy the tranquility and beauty of Bermuda's coastline from the comfort of their rooms. The resort provides exclusive amenities such as a private beach, a golf course, and a luxurious spa.However, it's important to note that The Reefs Resort & Club has a higher price point compared to other family resorts in Bermuda. Some guests have reported issues with the air conditioning, water pressure, and cleanliness of the rooms.On the positive side, The Reefs Resort & Club offers several different family suite options depending on the size of the family and how much privacy is needed.Now, let's move on to our next top choice for families, Grotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa, which offers a wide range of kid-friendly activities, family accommodations, dining options, safety and security, and value for money.Grotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa: Kid-friendly Activities, Family Accommodations, Dining Options, Safety and Security, Value for MoneyGrotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa offers a wide range of kid-friendly activities, such as swimming in the natural caves and enjoying special programs for kids. This resort truly understands the needs of families and goes above and beyond to ensure that children have a memorable and enjoyable stay. Here are some reasons why Grotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa is a great choice for families:Exciting adventures: The natural caves at the resort provide a unique and thrilling experience for kids, allowing them to explore and swim in a one-of-a-kind setting.Engaging programs: Grotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa offers special programs for kids, including pizza parties and activities that are designed to keep them entertained and engaged throughout their stay.Family-friendly amenities: From a full-size pool for the whole family to enjoy, to an on-site restaurant that caters to the tastes of both adults and children, Grotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa ensures that families have everything they need for a comfortable and enjoyable vacation.With its array of kid-friendly activities, family accommodations, dining options, safety and security measures, and value for money, Grotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa is a top choice for families seeking a memorable vacation experience.Now, let's delve into Pompano Beach Club and discover what it has to offer for families.Pompano Beach Club: Kid-friendly Activities, Family Accommodations, Dining Options, Safety and Security, Value for MoneyThere are three main factors to consider when evaluating the family-friendliness of Pompano Beach Club: the variety of kid-friendly activities, the quality of family accommodations, and the dining options available.Pompano Beach Club is situated in a beautiful beachfront location with soft pink sand and crystal-clear turquoise waters. Families can enjoy a range of activities, including organized beach games, snorkeling tours, and a kids club. The resort offers a games room for kids, three on-site restaurants, a pool, a spa, and kayak rental available for the summer months.However, it's important to note that Pompano Beach Club is located in a more secluded part of Bermuda, so transportation is needed to explore other parts of the island. Additionally, compared to other resorts in the area, Pompano Beach Club may be quieter with little entertainment and nightlife.Despite these factors, Pompano Beach Club provides a family-friendly atmosphere with plenty of amenities for all ages.Now, let's transition into discussing another family-friendly resort in Bermuda, Fairmont Southampton.Fairmont SouthamptonWhat activities and amenities does Fairmont Southampton offer for families?Fairmont Southampton offers a range of activities and amenities that are perfect for families looking to have a memorable vacation. Here are some of the highlights:Fun-filled activities: The resort features a golf course, perfect for families who enjoy a round of golf together. There's also a pool for both adults and kids, where everyone can splash and have a great time. Additionally, the resort offers a daily activities program, ensuring that there's always something exciting happening for the whole family to enjoy.Kid-friendly amenities: Fairmont Southampton understands the importance of catering to the needs of young guests. That's why they've a dedicated kid-friendly pool, where children can have a blast and make new friends. The resort also has an Explorers Camp Club, where kids can participate in supervised activities and games, giving parents some well-deserved relaxation time.Variety of dining options: The resort boasts ten on-site restaurants, offering a wide variety of cuisines to satisfy every palate. Families with young children will be pleased to know that children under 5 eat for free at these restaurants, making dining a hassle-free experience.With its luxurious accommodations, family-friendly amenities, and stunning location on the South Shore, Fairmont Southampton is a fantastic choice for families looking to create lasting memories on their Bermuda vacation.Cambridge Beaches Resort & SpaCambridge Beaches Resort & Spa offers a luxurious oceanfront experience with private waterfront cottages and breathtaking views.The resort boasts multiple on-site restaurants, providing a range of dining options to suit every palate.From cozy cottages to fine dining, Cambridge Beaches Resort & Spa promises a truly unforgettable experience.Private Waterfront CottagesWe love the idea of staying in private waterfront cottages at Cambridge Beaches Resort & Spa, surrounded by the beauty of Bermuda's coastline. Imagine waking up to the sound of gentle waves and stepping out onto your own private terrace, overlooking the crystal-clear turquoise waters.The sense of peace and serenity that comes with having your own secluded space is truly priceless. Plus, the cottages at Cambridge Beaches Resort & Spa are designed to provide the utmost comfort and luxury, with spacious living areas, fully equipped kitchens, and plush furnishings.It's the perfect retreat for families seeking a peaceful and rejuvenating vacation. Soak in the breathtaking views, unwind in your own private oasis, and create cherished memories that will last a lifetime.Range of Dining OptionsAt Cambridge Beaches Resort & Spa, we love the variety of dining options available to satisfy our culinary cravings. Whether we're in the mood for a romantic dinner overlooking the ocean or a casual lunch by the pool, the resort offers something for every taste and occasion. Here is a glimpse of the dining options at Cambridge Beaches:RestaurantCuisineAtmosphereTamarisk RoomFine DiningElegant and refinedBreezesCaribbeanRelaxed and breezyShuttersInternationalCasual and vibrantLongtail LoungeCocktailsLaid-back and chicMorning RoomBreakfastCozy and welcomingThe Tamarisk Room is the epitome of fine dining, offering a sophisticated atmosphere and exquisite cuisine. Breezes captures the flavors of the Caribbean, while Shutters showcases international dishes with a vibrant twist. The Longtail Lounge is the perfect spot to unwind with a cocktail, and the Morning Room is a cozy setting for a delicious breakfast. At Cambridge Beaches Resort & Spa, our dining options are sure to delight and satisfy every palate.Hamilton Princess & Beach ClubHamilton Princess & Beach Club is an iconic waterfront resort located in Hamilton, Bermuda, offering stunning views of the water.With its family-friendly amenities, including a dedicated kids' club and a family pool, the resort ensures that everyone, young and old, can have a memorable vacation.In addition, the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club boasts a variety of dining options, allowing guests to indulge in fine cuisine while enjoying the beautiful surroundings.Waterfront Views and AmenitiesLocated in Hamilton, the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club offers stunning waterfront views and a range of family-friendly amenities. Nestled along the picturesque coastline, this resort is the perfect destination for a memorable family vacation.Here are three reasons why the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club is an ideal choice for families:Exciting activities: From a family pool where kids can splash and play to a kids' club that offers a variety of supervised activities, the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club ensures that children of all ages are entertained throughout their stay.Fine dining options: Indulge in a culinary adventure with the resort's exceptional dining options. From casual beachside fare to elegant gourmet cuisine, there's something to satisfy every palate.Unforgettable views: Immerse yourself in the breathtaking beauty of Bermuda's waterfront from the comfort of your own balcony. The Hamilton Princess & Beach Club provides unparalleled views that will leave you in awe.With its stunning location, family-friendly amenities, and breathtaking views, the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club is the perfect choice for an unforgettable family vacation in Bermuda.Central Location and AccessibilityWe love how easily accessible the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club is from all parts of Bermuda. Located in the heart of Hamilton, this iconic waterfront resort offers convenience and convenience for families seeking a memorable vacation. With its central location, guests can easily explore the many attractions and activities that Bermuda has to offer.Not only is the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club conveniently located, but it also offers a range of family-friendly amenities. Families can enjoy the family pool, where kids can splash and play to their heart's content. The resort also has a kids' club, providing a range of activities and entertainment for children of all ages.For those seeking culinary delights, the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club boasts a variety of fine dining options. From world-class restaurants to casual eateries, there's something to satisfy every palate.Overall, the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club is the perfect choice for families looking for a centrally located resort with easy access to all that Bermuda has to offer.Variety of Dining OptionsWe are thrilled with the variety of dining options available at the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club, offering a diverse culinary experience for all tastes and preferences.Exceptional cuisine: From fine dining restaurants to casual eateries, the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club has it all. Their world-class chefs create delectable dishes using fresh, local ingredients, ensuring a memorable dining experience.Cultural immersion: The resort's dining options showcase the rich culinary traditions of Bermuda, allowing guests to sample local flavors and delicacies. Whether it's seafood, traditional Bermudian dishes, or international cuisine, there's something for everyone.Stunning ambiance: The restaurants at the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club boast breathtaking views of the waterfront, creating a picturesque backdrop for a memorable meal. Whether enjoying a romantic dinner or a family gathering, the ambiance adds an extra touch of magic to the dining experience.With such a wide range of dining options, the Hamilton Princess & Beach Club truly caters to every palate, making it the perfect destination for food lovers.Frequently Asked QuestionsWhat Is the Cancellation Policy at the Reefs Resort & Club?The cancellation policy at The Reefs Resort & Club is an important aspect to consider when planning your trip. Although we don't have the specific details without the context of 'Best Family Resorts Bermuda,' it's common for resorts to have different cancellation policies.These policies can vary based on factors such as the type of reservation, the length of stay, and the timing of the cancellation. It's always recommended to review the resort's official website or contact their customer service for the most accurate and up-to-date information regarding their cancellation policy.Are There Any Age Restrictions for the Kid-Friendly Activities at Grotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa?There are no age restrictions mentioned for the kid-friendly activities at Grotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa.The resort offers a range of activities for kids, including a full-size and kid-friendly pool, an on-site restaurant, a spa catering to both adults and kids, and special programs and pizza parties for kids.Families can enjoy the convenience of an all-inclusive package, which includes meals, drinks, and various activities.The standout feature of the resort is its natural caves, accessible for guests to explore and swim in.Does Pompano Beach Club Offer Any Water Sports Activities for Families?Yes, Pompano Beach Club offers a variety of water sports activities for families to enjoy.From kayaking to snorkeling, there are plenty of options to make your vacation exciting and memorable.The resort's beachfront location provides easy access to the crystal-clear turquoise waters, inviting you to explore the underwater world.Whether you're a beginner or an experienced water sports enthusiast, Pompano Beach Club has something for everyone in the family to enjoy.What Is the Average Cost of a Meal at the On-Site Restaurants at Fairmont Southampton?On average, meals at the on-site restaurants at Fairmont Southampton can vary in cost. The resort offers ten different dining options, providing a variety of culinary experiences.Children under 5 years old can eat for free, which can be a great value for families. From casual to fine dining, there are choices to suit different budgets.It's best to check the menus and prices at each restaurant to get a more accurate idea of the average cost of a meal.Can Guests at Cambridge Beaches Resort & Spa Book Spa Treatments in Advance?Yes, guests at Cambridge Beaches Resort & Spa can book spa treatments in advance.The resort offers a variety of spa and wellness facilities, including massages and beauty treatments.Whether you're looking to relax and rejuvenate or indulge in a pampering session, you can conveniently schedule your spa treatments ahead of time.Experience the luxury and tranquility of Cambridge Beaches Resort & Spa while enjoying their world-class spa services.ConclusionIn conclusion, Bermuda's best family resorts offer a perfect blend of luxury, relaxation, and fun for the whole family. Whether you choose The Reefs Resort & Club for its stunning cliffside views, Grotto Bay Beach Resort & Spa for its unique cave experience, or Pompano Beach Club for its beautiful beachfront location, you're sure to create unforgettable memories.So pack your bags, grab your loved ones, and embark on a family adventure that will make waves and leave you with memories to treasure for a lifetime.
submitted by Sweet-Count2557 to worldkidstravel [link] [comments]


2024.06.07 02:28 Amatikaiya 29 [F4M] NYC/NJ- Seeking a Partner in Crime

Hi! I'm an African-American female living in NYC trying to get back into the dating world after a period of focusing on establishing a career. Now that I've gotten security & stability in my life, it's time for me to get back out there.
About me:
What I am looking for:
If you are interested:
If interested, please send me a message (chat or DM), and give me some insight about the person you are, where you are located, and your hobbies.
submitted by Amatikaiya to r4r [link] [comments]


2024.06.06 17:36 Superteletubbies64 [H] Humble Choice June and more [W] Paypal EU, Nuclear Blaze, Turok 3, Undernauts: Labyrinth of Yomi, Lego Harry Potter Years 1-4, 5-7, Strayed Lights, Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy, No Longer Home, Blade of Darkness, Chasm: The Rift, Ingression, Shemune I & II

Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers and the games in the title, unlikely to take offers for anything else atm.
If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers. If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
submitted by Superteletubbies64 to GameTrade [link] [comments]


2024.06.06 17:36 Superteletubbies64 [H] Humble Choice June and more [W] Paypal EU, Nuclear Blaze, Turok 3, Undernauts: Labyrinth of Yomi, Lego Harry Potter Years 1-4, 5-7, Strayed Lights, Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy, No Longer Home, Blade of Darkness, Chasm: The Rift, Ingression, Shemune I & II

Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers and the games in the title, unlikely to take offers for anything else atm.
If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers. If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
submitted by Superteletubbies64 to indiegameswap [link] [comments]


2024.06.06 17:36 Superteletubbies64 [H] Humble Choice June and more [W] Paypal EU, Nuclear Blaze, Turok 3, Undernauts: Labyrinth of Yomi, Lego Harry Potter Years 1-4, 5-7, Strayed Lights, Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy, No Longer Home, Blade of Darkness, Chasm: The Rift, Ingression, Shemune I & II

Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers and the games in the title, unlikely to take offers for anything else atm.
If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
Looking primarily for Paypal EU offers. If you're not from EU I will only sell if you cover the paypal fees and pay in EUR instead of your native currency. I do not have a specific price for any games atm, I'm open to offers. Aside from games listed in the title I'm not very interested in offers for new games atm, even wishlisted ones
If it has "may keep" I have minor interest in the game and will likely decline any offers for it. I'd prefer to trade away games I have no interest in or own already. If I redeem it i'll remove it from the list.
DO NOT send me a chat invite before having agreed on a trade in the comments. I do not check chat often and it's a rule to not send a chat invite before commenting anyway.
If this post is more than 24-48 hours old it might not be up to date and you should check the latest trading post or my full list of tradables to see if the game(s) you want are still there.
Full wishlist here: https://barter.vg80b7/w/
My full list of tradables: https://barter.vg80b7/t/
Asterisk means region lock, ask if interested, the region lock varies depending on the game
NEW:
SOME NEW STUFF FROM OLD BUNDLES NOT SURE WHAT I WANT TO KEEP YET:
///////////////////
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
GOG keys
MAY KEEP (significantly less likely to accept offer for unless I desperately want the game you're offering)
https://www.reddit.com/IGSRep/comments/p7k848/superteletubbies64s_igs_rep_page/
submitted by Superteletubbies64 to SteamGameSwap [link] [comments]


2024.06.06 17:15 ThrowawayLikeLefty My experience of TC under Canadian Healthcare

I'm hoping I'm out of the woods with cancer now, though there's a chance I'm not, but I've posted a little here and found everyone's stories and information really useful, even just on an emotional level, so I thought I'd share mine.
I'm an immigrant to Canada and this is my first real experience of Canadian healthcare so I thought I'd contextualise that too.
April 4, 2024: I was bathing leisurely in the tub smoking a joint (fuck yeah, Canada!) when I noticed my left testicle was hard. The right one was normal and squishy. I was high as hell so I gave them a very paranoid examination. Didn't find a lump, so didn't consider cancer. Figured it was a weird thing that would go away.
April 5: I noticed an aching sensation in my groin but put it down to being a little too vigorous in my examination. However the sensation didn't subside the next day (April 6) so I booked an appointment with my GP/Family Doctowhatever you wanna call your regular doctor. I didn't mark it as urgent or anything so I had to wait a week to see her.
Over the next week the sensation didn't subside, in fact the discomfort was growing. Perhaps I was more aware of it, but sometimes I even felt I was walking a little funny.
April 12: Saw my GP. She had a good ol' fondle and didn't think anything was unusual but booked me in for an ultrasound, and also did an STI test (negative!).
That was a Friday, I had my ultrasound on Monday April 15th.
April 16th I get a notification for a phone appointment with my doctor on April 17th. My doctor prefers to only do phone appointments for emergencies and mental health... so this set alarm bells ringing.
April 17th my doctor called me and told me my ultrasound was concerning and that she was sending me to a urologist at Princess Margaret Hospital.
Friday April 19 I get a call from the urologist at Princess Margaret. I'd taken the day off and intended to make the most of it so asked if I could come in the following week. They made it quite clear I should definitely come in that same day.
Cue: panic attacks. I've had anxiety disorders in the past but until this point I hadn't seriously considered cancer, and when a cancer hospital tells you to come in *that day* in a country known for slow healthcare... well I called my doctor to get a new lorazepam prescription.
I went in to see the urologist, Dr Robert Hamilton. He was awesome, and it turns out one of the top testicle doctors in North America. I have since been reading research papers on TC and his name is almost always in the authors list.
Dr Hamilton examined me and pretty much instantly said "Oh yeah, thats definitive". He sat me down and explained that there was a 95% chance I had testicular cancer, that the treatment is an orchiectomy, and that he would get me into surgery as soon as he could. He offered a prosthetic, I declined. I just didn't want something fake in my body -- that's a personal choice, no judgement on either from me. I just didn't want it.
He referred me for bloodwork. The bloodwork came back that same day: All well within normal range. HCG 2. AFP 1.8. LDH 185.
At this point I started corresponding with Dr H's assistant, Kerry, who was also awesome and kept me totally up to date on finding a surgery slot. They had been considering adding me "to the board", meaning I would be triaged as an emergency surgery, if they couldn't find a spot within a couple of weeks.
In the end they got me a slot with Dr Zlotta at Mount Sinai, which is just across the street from Princess Margaret. The date was set for May 2nd.
Dr Zlotta, it turned out, was headhunted from Belgium for his expertise in testicular cancer (although he's more of a prostate guy now). He wanted to meet me before surgery, so I went to Mount Sinai and he talked me through the process and recovery, and just got to know me and my partner a little better.
I should probably note I was freaking out the whole time and quashing panic attacks with medication.
Surgery:
Prep: Nil by mouth from midnight the night before. No alcohol or cannabis for 24 hours before. I was allowed my lorazepam, which I took. They encouraged it because they didn't want me having panic attacks in the hospital!
My surgery was at 8am. I had to arrive at the hospital at 6am. I did not sleep well the night before.
I confess that the day of surgery is a little blurry, but I had to put one of those embarrassing gowns on. I was seen by various different nurses and staff who asked me which testicle it was about 6 times (weirdly not very reassuring) and then marked my left hand with pen.
I remember walking into the operating room and seeing a bunch of faces I didn't recognise, being asked to lie on the table, and then having the mask fitted with oxygen etc. They all immediately recognised I was on the edge of a panic attack and started asking me about my tattoos to distract me.
Then I woke up, sitting sort of upright in the recovery area. I had been "conscious" for a while, but not really. The first thing I said was "is [partner's name] ok?" ... which prompted them to fetch my partner. She handed me my glasses and I confidently thanked her. I said "Face!".
I still remember saying thanks. I really thought I said thanks.
I wasn't allowed to leave until I peed, so I made a nurse keep bringing me large cups of tea. The nurse was also quite liberal with the IV hydromorphone so I felt *fucking great* at this point.
Eventually I could pee. I wanted to check my junk out so I walked myself to the bathroom, rather than use a little pot by the bed. It looked... weirdly normal, if a little bruised. I could barely tell the ball was gone at this point.
My partner went and got the car while an attendant wheeled me out of the hospital. We went home. It was about 130pm by now.
I don't remember a lot from that day, I was high as hell on opiates and anesthetic. I called my friend in the UK and had a cheerful natter in the sunshine on my patio. I had no idea how much pain I was about to be in.
May 3rd: Recovery begins.
I couldn't even sit up in bed. I woke up in so much pain I couldn't really speak. My partner asked if I wanted pain meds, to which I replied through gritted teeth "yes. now."
When the hydromorphone kicked in I drifted back off to sleep, but eventually forced myself to get up.
The following week was a process of gradually feeling less pain and slowly being able to walk. I don't know how some of you guys are able to feel normal after a couple of days, perhaps it's cause I'm older (34) than many of you, but recovery was kinda brutal.
The mental part was the hardest. I was super depressed, crying after friends visited. I just wanted to be left alone.
I am freelance so I tried to do some work in the week after surgery but as a creative worker I just didn't have the brain power. The drugs, the fatigue, the depression all just took it out of me.
I got the pathology back a few days later:
CS1 Seminoma. 1.8cm x 2cm x 1.9cm. Confined to testes, but with LVI.
Lepidemic involvement of the rete testes (still unsure about exactly what that means or the implications really).
I had a follow up appointment with Dr Zlotta two weeks later. He told me the pathology was excellent news and that he'd be "flabbergasted" if I was recommended chemo, or anything other than monitorning. I knew this already because I'd read Dr Hamilton's paper on what to recommend to stage 1 TC patients.
31st May: My follow up with Dr Hamilton. He was awesome, explained the potential treatment options (1xcarboplatin or monitoring). He strongly recommended just monitoring and explained that my relapse risk is somewhere between 7.5% and 19%, probably around 12-13% based on current research. He said chemo would only lower it by a few percent but has negative long term outcomes.
I chose monitoring. I'll have CT scans every 6 months for three years, then every year for another three, then again at 7 and 9 years. Then I'll be declared cured, assuming no relapse. I was told even if I relapse I have a 99%+ chance of survival.
So that's where I am now. I'm off the lorazepam and feeling much better mentally and physically. The scar itches but otherwise is healing really nicely.
My main takeaway: Make sure you take at least a week off work after surgery. You need it for your physical and mental health.
The other takeaway? My partner is fucking amazing and I fully intend to marry her. She was incredible from start to finish. I love her so much.
Finally: Canadian healthcare fucking rules when you really need it. I've paid a total of like $40 for some lorazepam and hydromorphones. (edit: and $150 for sperm banking)
I hope this helped. It's been a bewildering two months. Best of luck to everyone out there.
Edit: forgot to mention a couple of things:
I brought up my fatigue to Dr Hamilton on the 31st May and he got my testosterone levels measured. Super low, but not unhealthy. That's to be expected, but if it doesn't rise over the next year we'll talk TRT.
He also recommend I make a deposit at the sperm bank, so I did. That part cost $150. If I keep them frozen it'll be $300 a year, so in about 6 months I'll have my sperm examined to see if it is "gorgeous" (to quote Dr Hamilton), and then if its all good I can ditch it.
submitted by ThrowawayLikeLefty to testicularcancer [link] [comments]


2024.06.06 07:59 succession_ 5-yr. old girl question

Hi beyond, I posted this question yesterday on the parenting subreddit & someone mentioned that hyper-sexuality is a sign of child abuse.i think my question was removed through, so hopefully I can post it here. Would love some feedback since I don’t have kids.
This was exactly one year ago. Our neighbors had just moved in. They came over for dinner & drinks & brought their 5-yr. old daughter & 8-yr. old son. The neighbors & their kids met all of us, then the daughter immediately started following me around. (I live with my sister & husband & they were outside talking to the neighbors.)
My sister has 2 teenage sons, & the daughter met all of us that night at the same time. The daughter came up to me a few minutes after I met her & said to me ‘I like the boy in the red shorts!’
I’m like um ok.?!? I don’t have kids so I’m like awe cute innocent comment she thinks that my nephew is cute. 🥴 Fast forward about an hour later, I’m taking my nephews laundry upstairs to his room. The little girl is following me upstairs & when we are in his room, she taps me on the leg & whispers to me ‘have you ever seen his penis?’
The 5-yr. old pre-k daughter who I just met an hour earlier asked me if I’ve ever seen my nephews penis.
For some background context, her mother got divorced from the kids dad in 2021. Within 1 month, she was dating a new man named Mike & he had 2 teenage sons of his own. She would bring her kids around his kids & immediately immeshed their families. That relationship lasted 8 months. Then 3 months later,she started dating a new guy who she met on Hinge. He is now the guy she is living with as our neighbors. He has no kids. I did a background check on them & no criminal records.
Also, oh I should add this too because I think it’s relevant. Th 8 yr. old son almost got expelled from his school for pulling down a girls pants when he was in 1st grade. This child also JUST got expelled from his spring camp back in April for stealing the camps treasure chest money, called ‘chest bucks.’
This is a screenshot that I saw on their Alexa device in their kitchen. I think it’s from their dad to their mom: https://ibb.co/J5LJBjM
*see paragraph below for Alexa device shenanigans.
So, something is going on with these kids.
Also, I should add that I take care of their dogs & chickens when they go out of town. They have an Alexa device in their kitchen that shows pictures from her iPhone/Amazon Photos account. There was a super cute pic of their dogs that had scrolled by & I wanted to see more, so I said ‘Alexa, show my pictures.’ I was standing there for a few minutes looking at the pics scrolling by & some of these picture were naked pictures/selfies of the mom because they are synced from her iPhone. Another picture was of her masterbating. I don’t think she knows that these are either synced with her iPhone or display on their Alexa device. Because it also shows pictures of her with her ex-boyfriend & I don’t think her current boyfriend would appreciate that. I don’t think they have noticed this, because maybe they don’t stand there long enough to notice that these pictures could potentially fly by.
So that’s the story & im just wondering what is going on in their household & why her pre-k daughter asked me if I’ve ever seen my nephews penis.
submitted by succession_ to ChildPsychology [link] [comments]


2024.06.05 23:35 username1276363 My best friend tried to get w me while I had a bf, then bullied me.

I (15 transmasc) was friends with this girl (15 female) for less then one school year. She was my best friend and we did almost everything together. I slept over her house literally every two weeks and she helped me through one of the worst experiences of my life (i was sa-d by an ex boyfriend around the time we started hanging out) we became friends in October of this year and around April of this year I started to tell her about this guy I was interested in.
We sat together at lunch everyday at her insistence, she would come over to my table every day and I, like clockwork, would go sit at a table where it was just us. The guy I was interested in started coming over and sitting with us to talk to me, since he didn't really now my friend. I did my best to include both of them, because i know what it feels like to not be included. It got to the point were every time my crush would come over, she would shut down until he left or just leave herself and sit with her other friends.
Around the 5th time my crush came over, one of her friends mysteriously also came over. She started talking to her other friend about times they hung out or memories I wasn't a part of so I'd talk to my crush. She then, several times, would loudly start talking about these jokes she her friend would make about a 'situation.' (guess what the situation was) She would make jokes like "yeah I was talking to my friend and she was like, 'yes he's probably part of the Illuminati, he's trying to steal her away from you.' my friend is so funny!" and because I'm not a complete idiot I knew who she was talking about.
I also knew that i was the 'she' that my friend was mentioning, which hurt a little bit. I started getting nervous around her then, because I knew she was talking shit about me to her other friends. I made excuses to my crush about why I couldn't talk to him at lunch so she wouldn't feel left out etc. (she also started putting her stuff on the chair across from me, where she usually sat, and started sitting next to me, where my crush usually sat.)
A few days later, she made jokes about how her friend gave her a deadline to 'confront the situation' and how it was stressing her out. I was sympathetic, I tried to make her feel better but it got to the point she was complaining about me to me. I eventually confronted her about it while over her house and we came up with an honest to god schedule.
The very next day, my crush asked me out and now we're dating. My friend started avoiding me, stopped sitting with me at lunch, etc. I noticed, when I asked her about it she just vaguely said that 'she discovered something about her self that kept her up at night.' I pretty much guessed she liked me after that, but I didn't say anything in case I was wrong because I didn't wanna seem like a narcissist.
(Context for this next bit: we had an ongoing joke where we had a ship name because people kept asking if we were dating, I checked with my boyfriend to see if that was still okay and he said yeah.) More and more of her friends started making jokes about us dating, which made me slightly uncomfortable because I was already dating someone. We were touchy as friends but it increased and I always shut her down when she asked if we could cuddle or if she could put her head on my shoulder. I felt like she was taking advantage of our closeness.
This girl also had a crush on my older brother, whos a senior (she's a freshman) and she would shit talk his gf constantly. Her friends constantly hyped her up and told her that he 'defiantly' wanted her, so naturally I knew she was doing the same w me and my bf. Then, she started joking about how she had a playlist that had a really long and stupid title so it was hard for her alexa to play. The playlist was all love songs and, I kid you not, an acronym with our 'ship name.'
Last straw, I confronted her about the crush. Asked her to stop making jokes about us dating, asked her to delete the playlist and told her that I still wanted to be just. friends. She agreed and I found out a week later she didn't listen to any of what I said so I texted her, yelled at her after she defended the guy who assaulted me, told me I outed her (she is a girl, i'm a boy.) and then I blocked her.
Then, a bunch of people who were mutual friends of ours started ghosting me, ignoring me or talking about me behind my back. Also, my tiktok account got banned for not being 13, when I made a new one it got banned again and etc etc.
I can't talk to my friends or my boyfriend about this, because I do genuinely miss her a lot and since she genuinely screwed my over they won't understand.
TLDR: My best friend started talking about me behind my back when I told her I had a bf, then started getting more touchy with me, made a playlist of centered around us dating after I had a bf. Then banned 3 tiktok accounts.
submitted by username1276363 to GetOffMyChest [link] [comments]


2024.06.05 22:26 CringeyVal0451 The Hairy One-Off Trailer + Married Mary / Funky P Wrap-Up (Part 2)

Bangled, Tangled, Spangled, and Spaghettied
The “hairy summer” might come out as a one-off. I’ll write a trailer, and you guys tell me if it’s worth posting the short story!
From the weirdo who brought you Funky P. Beard and Married Mary... comes the story of a summer musical brimming with soulful singing, delightful dancing, and horrifying heaps of human garbage. Get bangled. Get tangled. Get spangled. And get spaghettited.... Cringey Val (and maybe ReddX Industries???) presents... A Hairy Summer and a Pearl Jam Cocktail!
Okay, here are the highlights: Scumbanger did something so vile and inappropriate, I’m not sure I can put it in writing without getting sued by an advocacy organization. Then there was this bossy cast member who stank so badly, the guys had to use the girls’ dressing room just so they could breathe without barfing. This pong monster was a tall, glamorous, genuinely talented drag queen named Thomas. He was American, but his name was pronounced, “Toh-MAH.” To this day, he remains the only gay guy I’ve ever known who had a hygiene problem.
And then there was the “historical consultant” who was supposed to be an expert on 1960s counterculture. This bozo couldn’t have possibly been much older than 40, so his claims of having "lived through the late 60s" just meant that he was a wee one at most during that era. He dyed his hair gray (this was obvious because he had brown roots), he dressed like Lewis Skolnick from Revenge of the Nerds, he was obsessed with Richard Nixon (even though he should have been talking about LBJ), and he openly hated everything about modern pop culture. Imagine a non-wholesome, Nixon-obsessed Norman.
And he loved younger women who enjoyed modern pop culture, yet he made it his mission in life to capture us and teach us the error of our ways. Don't get me wrong. I absolutely adore music, movies, novels, fashion... all sorts of things that were before my time. But I also enjoy generationally-appropriate pop culture. Video games. Shows like It's Always Sunny. Modern musicals like... (horrified gasp!) Hamilton. That doesn't make me a shallow moron, NORMAN. And I'm not going near the "mini museum" in your basement, ya creep. Nasty Norman finally got fired for sending Dionne a sausage selfie (she said he even dyed his pubes gray).
And then there was Mary’s inappropriate (and illegal) behavior when she came to see the show. Big titty privilege kept her out of jail, but she enjoyed running around making up stories about having done hard time and having swapped snail trails with her celly. She continued to write love letters to her "prison wife" long after she was released. That was probably a healthier marriage than her real one, to be honest. And remember, Mary never got arrested at all. The prison wife did not exist.
And because I began writing this section with the intention of connecting Married Mary to Funky P., please allow me to spit out an observation. Funky, according to the tales I heard from the remaining chummers in the Shadowrun crew, was indeed a tall, bearded bump on a log who basically just did Mori’s bidding and engaged in excessive grumbling over trivial matters (namely, the attractiveness of other men) during the formative years of the gaming sessions. He only occasionally lost his temper. But he seemed to become considerably more aggressive around the time of his dalliance with Mary. WHY?
While Funky never spoke of his feelings regarding Mary’s ensnarement of his tantalizing tally-whacker, I suspect that he felt somewhat emasculated by her ability to exert control over him. Mary was indeed a ferocious force when she wanted something. And she always wanted something. But I also think that Funky was taking notes while she was bossing him around. The pitiful crying. The yelling. The tantrums. The constant scrutiny and the keeping of tabs, which was (in my mind) the male equivalent of Mary’s insane clinginess. I think he picked up a fair amount of manipulation tactics from her and then managed to improve on them.
Did Mary “create” Funky? I don’t think so. I think Funky was fucked up long before Mary started grinding on him at The Imp. But I think she facilitated certain elements of the goblinization, namely the manipulation. She served as both baggage and inspiration. Dennis might have done something similar for me. Of course, he was baggage. But his inconsistent attention, instead of making me more considerate of the other’s person’s time and feelings, made me more inclined to be distant. To this day, I catch myself pulling away when I realize I’ve caught feelings for someone. I can usually override that tendency and communicate like a fucking adult. But the instinct to go radio silent as soon as feelings emerge got its hooks in deep. I am not proud of this. And I'll continue to work on it.
So when I began to think of pre-Funky Whisky as a legitimately dateable dude, I pulled away. Remember that I was fresh out of the Dennis Debacle at that point. But when I pulled away, I think that thrilled pre-Funky Whisky. I wasn’t blowing up his phone. I wasn’t camping out on his doorstep. I wasn’t whining for his attention. So our respective pseudo-exes fucked us up in a way that made us initially compatible. Do I blame them? Fuck yes! Dennis was a piece of shit and Mary was bat-shit crazy!
Do I honestly blame them? Not really. The whole mess was a runny, undercooked casserole of bad experiences serving as the ingredients for even worse experiences... and bad decisions getting smothered in the gritty goo of truly atrocious decisions. So let’s see what happened when summer ended and Mary decided to pick on Funky one more time!
Things had begun to simmer down, but Mary just had to stir up some drama by making Funky a pearl jam cocktail at Filthy McNasty's. He ran crying to me over this heinous slight, even though this all happened during our one and only bona fide break. And he lured me back into his life with feigned emotional distress, assuring me that he just needed a friend. Nasty Norman had turned his creepy "old guy wanna-be" energy towards me after the show closed, and Funky offered to pose as my boyfriend a few times in an effort to discourage Norman. Somewhere along the line, it ceased to be an act. I'll give Funky this. He knew how to use creeps and flakes to prop himself up. I'm embarrassed that it worked on me. My current solution is to stay far, far away from the creeps and the flakes. So there's not even an opportunity for a gallant Nice Guy TM to offer his "services." Double WIN!!!
But once things began to feel dangerous with Funky, what could I have done differently? I've spent a great deal of time asking myself this. I recently heard a mental health TikTokker from The Manosphere rant about how humans always have agency, even in the most seemingly hopeless situations. Did I lose my agency with Funky? Certainly not. But my agency became impotent with Funky (just like his own precious peen). My words fell on deaf ears. He assigned nefarious intentions to even the most innocuous actions. "Why are you making coffee? Are you imagining some time when you had coffee with one of your pretty boy douchebag exes????" No, dude. Just wanted a cup of coffee. "BULLSHIT!" And then a screaming match would ensue.
In retrospect, I could have definitely gone to Mad Mox for help. I could have gone to the university and asked them to place another call to social services. I could have gone to one of my professors and asked them to put me in touch with someone who specialized in helping people out of coercive control situations. But even though we had studied coercive control in one of my classes, I wouldn't admit that Funky was doing that shit to me until I looked back on the relationship with nothing to prove to myself.
The truth was that I was humiliated to have been in that kind of situation. Since I was a psych grad student, I felt like I should have known better. That's why I get so bristly when people leave comments that call my intelligence and my credentials into question, haughtily stating that I should have known better. I know they probably think they're making an astute observation or calling me out on some bullshit. Try taking a beat and just do a cursory google search next time you feel the need to make such a comment.
You'll quickly see that it's not at all uncommon for individuals in every corner of the mental health profession to have been victims of some sort of maltreatment. Yes, even AFTER having completed grad school, an internship, a fellowship, med school, or even decades of practice. If I hadn't been so ashamed, I would have reached out for help as soon as the mask slipped. And when I finally got away, I had to work through the shame over letting it go on for as long as it did, the shame over not reaching out when I could have, and the shame over getting trapped in an unhealthy relationship in the first place. I thought I had made my peace and I felt confident that I had overcome the shame.
And then I posted these stories on the internet. Dude... I have struggled emotionally with the shaming and blaming that appears in every single comments section I've dared to peruse throughout the airings of these stories. And if you've reached out to me and made it right, it's ancient history. But I can count on one hand... One FINGER the number of people who've done that. So, yeah. A bunch of you are dirtbags. Just say you don't like my writing or you don't vibe with me if you HAVE TO pop off. As I've said many times, I deserved to get dumped. I didn't deserve to get terrorized.
And the aforementioned blaming and shaming is a broader problem that I'm really not equipped to tackle alone. What I mean is that it goes far beyond my own personal butt-hurt. It's an egregious thing to say to anyone who's been mistreated. But I don't know if there's an answer to the problem since the people who blame and shame will die on the hill of, "I'M HELPING." You're not. You're harming more than you could possibly imagine. But I don't know what it would take to make any of you understand the degree to which such nonsense is detrimental.
Okay, what was that? My third dash of salt? I really am done now. And I'm pretty sure there's still plenty of salt left over for The Hot Dog Man! Let's get back on track! Coulda, shoulda, woulda. Hindsight's 20/20. I learned a hard lesson. And, for better or worse, I decided to share it. Warts and all. Not genital warts... I just mean I tried really hard to own it where I fucked up.
Let’s lighten the mood and catch up with the beardos and weirdos!
WHERE ARE THEY NOW???
I’ll kick things off with some dirt on D.E.N.N.I.S. I hadn’t thought about him in years. We had remained Facebook friends, but we’d never had any meaningful exchanges. And then one day, out of nowhere, I got a very long DM from him. He apologized profusely for his behavior in grad school, admitted that he knew he’d broken my heart, and he insisted that we should meet for drinks when he was back in California on business. Drinks? I thought Dennis didn't drink... Maybe that accidental shot to tequila steered him away from the LAWD and down the sinful path of the bottle! then again, when was Dennis EVER honest (with me or with himself)? Never.
I should probably mention that Funky had hacked into my laptop, copied my diary, and posted it online in its entirety while we were dating. So Dennis had gotten to read my terrible Carrie Bradshaw impression in which he was the Mr. Big character. “I could help but wonder... How could a grown man, a grown who loved to study human behavior, fail to muster the courage to meet the eyes that had looked upon his naked body the night before.” Ugh...
When I arrived, with some trepidation, at the hotel bar... I couldn’t spot The Golden God. And then a man in a snazzy suit with a mighty beer gut and an unflattering goatee tripped my fusiform face area. Being a bit of a "short king," his frame didn't exactly allow him to rock the beer gut. So apparently it was the beer can, not the tequila bottle that had corrupted douchey, duplicitous, oh so dashing, butt-blasting Dennis.
Despite the booming beer gut and hideous facial fuzz, Dennis put on a cocksure and flirtatious air straight away and was shocked when I wasn’t receptive. Looks like the D.E.N.N.I.S. system won’t work forever. And it wasn’t the weight and the awful goatee that made the thought of bedding The Menace uninteresting. It was the fact that I had bedded Axton. That was one of those “unicorn situations” where the reality exceeded the expectation to an extent that I feel slightly uncomfortable describing... There was no way in hell Dennis could compare. Axton, at his most basic, could fuck circles around Dennis at his peak.
The Menace nevertheless started spamming me with long, inappropriate, saccharine text messages. No sausage selfies, fortunately. Just half-hearted apologies, vague declarations of love, and then paragraphs upon paragraphs of cringe-worthy erotica that seemed to have been copy/pasted from an old fanfic forum full of filthy-minded freaks. No one could ever build palaces out of those paragraphs, let alone cathedrals. Burn, bitch. How the mighty fall.
Now let’s move on to Moe. Funky’s tasteless smear campaign had absolutely no effect on Moe’s ways, for the record. Another altruism fail for Funky. The last time I bumped into Moe, he was throwing a temper tantrum because an extremely inebriated, much younger woman had called her girlfriend to pick her up instead of getting into the car with him. He was wearing baggy jeans, a Vulcan Science Academy hockey jersey, some bizarre medallion, ridiculous kicks, fake freckles (most of which got lost in his wrinkles), and a sideways baseball cap. And he had made a miserable attempt to paint his fingernails. I think he currently has a livestream where he talks about Tarot Cards and love spells. And he apparently pays escorts to appear on these streams. To my knowledge, Moe has never actually harmed anyone, but all signs point to him continuing to be a creepazoid.
And now for some good news! Mary is a normal human being now!!! She spent at least a year in a mental health facility where she was obviously an active participant in her own recovery because the treatment seemed to do a world of good. I’m not super close to her anymore, but she was well-mannered and pleasant last time I saw her. I honestly had a good time catching up with her. She’s lost a bunch of weight and is now as gorgeous as she believed herself to be during the events of the story.
But I don’t want to put too much emphasis on the weight. She was obnoxious during the Married Mary saga, primarily because of her behavior. And even though it can come off as cringey, I have some degree of admiration for women who can strut their stuff no matter their size. If I get so much as some mild monthly bloating, you can bet I’ll be wearing oversized sweatshirts. Anyway, Married Mary is RE-Married Mary, and she seems genuinely smitten with her new hubby. So let’s all give her a big round of applause for doing the work and embracing personal growth. Way to go, girl!!! But please stop talking about your golden shower from The Golden God. You're more than a big-tittied urinal cake. Plus... It's gross.
As for Funky? His ass was in jail. Excuse me. PRISON. It’s difficult to explain what landed him there because mentions of the specific crime that he committed are frowned upon under any and all circumstances. So I’ll be vague. A few years after I escaped, he sloppily photoshopped some poor dude’s face onto some... truly vile images in an unsuccessful effort to frame the poor dude. And he posted these images all over social media, so he got busted for distributing... that.
For whatever reason, he didn’t stay in prison for very long, and he’s once again a free beard. I have no contact with him, I have no desire to know more about his current situation, and I don’t even think I’d recognize him if I saw him since he probably had to shave in prison. But for the sake of those close to him, I do hope that he finds a way to explore the roots of his rage. I’m just not sure what it would take to convince him to consider the possibility that his various vicious attacks are not, in fact, acts of altruism.
And now feels like a good time to reveal the single most shocking truth about Funky... He was well-endowed. Why was he so insecure about the size of his member??? Maybe because its largeness made the whisky willy worse since there was more surface area for the reduced blood flow to (quite literally) “let down.” Maybe he watched too much hentai and felt itty-bitty in comparison to cartoon dongs. Maybe he’s just a generally insecure person. I have no idea. But it’s weird, right? He positively oozed small pee-pee energy.
Mori, according to reliable sources, is now running a small sex cult... Excuse me. A “kink retreat” in Hawaii. I never got to know Mori well enough to attempt a deep dive into his psyche. Weird and power-hungry as he appeared, he never struck me as cruel. But it seems that his monkeyshines were exceptionally off-putting to some people, and I do apologize if I crossed a line by writing about the staff shenanigans. I wasn't personally bothered by it; but as I've said many times, I've apparently encountered more nasty situations than the average person, so my gross-o-meter needs some recalibrating.
And as a person who, believe it or not, takes writing seriously, I’ll certainly take the negative responses into account if I ever decided to try to spin this story into something resembling a book. Mori played an integral role in my escape by putting Funky in his place just enough to give me the upper hand for a moment, so I feel horrible for accidentally writing him as nothing but a loathsome perv. I mean, he *was* weird as hell, but he was also nuanced. I think I failed at getting that across. Then again, I feel like some people really enjoyed Mori. I suppose it's fun to have a divisive character in your story! So I'll have some pros and cons to weigh.
But let’s move on to the guy who got a universally good reaction!!! Snorlax married a girl named Eevee and I still see them fairly regularly to play non-degenerate games of Shadowrun at the vintage gaming shop that Sage and Athena intend to take over when the current owner retires. Oh, and Snorlax’s physical therapy eventually got him back in the ring, and he’s a mound of pure, intimidating muscle again. Still smokes the devil’s lettuce, but in moderation. Sage and Athena got married a few years after the events of the story and they have two adorable kiddos. Axton remains one of my dearest friends in the world even though we never really became a couple.
I was worried that people would be annoyed with me for including a romantic subplot in the Funky P. story. And then I was worried that people would be mad because Axton and I didn’t get married and have babies. But I think I was once again worried about imaginary critics. I’ll reiterate what I said in the afterward of Funky P. Beard: I’m genuinely happy being single. Some of us are just wired that way. I love Axton to the moon and back, but I don’t think I would love him so much if we’d tried to force a labeled relationship that wasn’t happening naturally.
Let’s move on to the non-beardy people from the Married Mary saga! They’ve been through some rough stuff that’s really not my place to share. But they’ve all landed on their feet! I’m currently gathering my costume for Lucy’s daughter’s birthday party. Yes, I still do the party princess thing. I doubt I’ll ever stop donning costumes for kids’ parties, even if I eventually have to switch to dressing up as Disney villains when I get too old to pass for a princess. Is there an opportunity for some social commentary about ageism? Yeah. Probably. Go nuts in the comments!
And thank you so, so much for reading! I know I’ve said it before, but I don’t have the words to express how much it means to me when anyone is able to power through tales of my bizarre experiences, even if those experiences aren’t relatable. If you made it, I have endless admiration for your patience. Extra special thanks to ReddX for lending his voice and his hysterically funny and insightful commentary to these stories!!! Without the videos, Funky P. Beard and Married Mary would just be a bunch of impotent words disintegrating in the dumpsters of publishing houses, or bleakly existing in the void of an unvisited blog. To ReddX and the entire ReddX gang, you guys are LEGENDS for breathing life into these stories.
As for me, I’m certainly no legend. But I am a functional, content human being with a fabulous family and plenty of friends who love and accept me despite my past foolishness. My life is far from perfect, but I’m still perky and free-spirited. Funky didn’t take that away. And for whatever it’s worth, I never got duped by another neckbeard following the Funky farce, although quite a few tried. I’m a little weird. I'm not particularly bothered by weirdness in others. And that sometimes makes me beard bait. I know that. So whenever I clock a warning sign of beardery, I slowly back away from the impending drama, smoke a bowl, and laugh it off... so to speak. I’m just saying I try to be more like Snorlax.
And the time has come for me to slowly back away from this story. It’s been both a labor of love and a healing exercise to write this, but it might have felt like a chore to read it or listen to it. If so, I deeply regret that. I tried to make this an entertaining ride, but I can certainly understand why it might not be universally relatable. And I probably could have done a better job of explaining what made me feel trapped in the relationship with Funky if I had been willing to take a big, steamy trauma dump on the internet. But I’m hoping this installment was more of a trauma shart. So now... I wipe away the skid-marks, flush the remnants of Funky down the toilet and simply light a match. No need to spray an entire can of Axe.
submitted by CringeyVal0451 to ReddXReads [link] [comments]


2024.06.05 18:20 Southern-Comfort4519 John Harvey 1973 Montreal Alouettes

My Uncle John Harvey played his rookie year with the 73’Montreal Alouettes. He went on from there to play two seasons (74’ and 75’) with the Memphis Southmen of the WFL but then returned to Canada to play his last year of professional football with the Argos in 76’. He played 1 game with Hamilton in 77’. Though he is deemed in hotly debated circles as the hands down best football player ever to come out of the state of Texas, he had personal issues that distracted his focus from succeeding in what he did best. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been outside of the state of Texas and ran into someone who remembered his athletic feats. I mean I don’t even know these people but when I say “John Harvey” they start talking about watching him play and literally … they won’t shut up…lol. It warms my heart to know he touched so many lives in this way. He passed away May 30, 2024. I’ve been scouring the internet for a few years trying to find footage of him playing but so far I can only found this one clip. We would like to memorialize him well at his upcoming funeral. I don’t know why it didn’t occur to me to try Reddit. I made a post on this page last week and a few guys gave me some very good leads on where I might find more archival film footage but to. I avail. I reached out to a few collectors, the Alouettes, both Hall of Fame organizations and have yet to get any type of response. To date this is the only video clip I’ve been able to find of him on the internet. A phenomenal run by a phenomena athlete, father, Uncle, and Man of God. Rest in peace Beloved.
submitted by Southern-Comfort4519 to CFL [link] [comments]


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