Introduction

Pertaining to Taylor Swift, "Female Rage" has deviated from its intended meaning after Swift debuted a new performance of The Tortured Poets Department during the Eras Tour. Now, according to Swift's use of the phrase, female rage is interpreted as public backlash against Swift's dating choices rather than as a response to the broader injustices against women and women's rights. This post examines Taylor Swift's flawed feminism, philanthropy, branding, and the controversial trademark petition for the phrase "Female Rage: The Musical". Swift's background as an entertainer, indeterminate politics, and alignment with capitalism over feminism pervades her legacy, again threatening her public tolerance as not just an individual but as a brand.

Once Upon a Female Rage...

If you were cognizant in the early 2010's, you've heard countless jabs at Taylor Swift in the media. Magazines, radio, or online. Music critics did not take her seriously as a songwriter; parents put a woman on an unrealistic pedestal as the ideal role model for their children; she dated too much and used men as lyrical fodder. No matter the story, it inevitably spread, conjoined with everyone's respective opinions, and you'd be left to wonder, "Why does everyone hate this girl so much?"
Taylor's target demographic has always been young or adolescent girls, more so when Swift herself was one. She made music that spoke to the awkward misfit, cultivating a para-social relationship with fans on MySpace, then later twitter, Instagram, and YouTube, where Taylor posted relatable vlogs showcasing the life of a homegrown American girl. Taylor had a delayed public "growing up" and, compared to her female pop contemporaries, Swift never "gratuitously sexualized her image and seems pathologically averse to controversy" (and, apparently, never even had a sip of alcohol until she turned 21). She was more than happy to spin this narrative to allude to an inherent moral superiority above other women in the industry (Better Than Revenge, heard of it?), engaging in the very slut-shaming that she herself endured (the Madonna and Whore archetypes). The victim complex arose with the need to prove Taylor as a different type of pop girl. Based upon her holy and clean image, Swift had been dubbed "a feminist's nightmare", and that "[To Swift] other girls are obstacles; undeserving enemies who steal Taylor’s soulmates with their bewitching good looks and sexual availability." Feminism and Tennessee-Christian country values don't exactly mix, it seems.
Years later, Swift befriended Lena Dunham and thus experienced white feminism osmosis, where Dunham taught Swift that real feminists defend rapists, makes insensitive jokes about rape and abortion, and prioritize all-white casts. Swift then declared herself a feminist in 2014, saying,

"Becoming friends with Lena – without her preaching to me, but just seeing why she believes what she believes, why she says what she says, why she stands for what she stands for – has made me realize that I’ve been taking a feminist stance without actually saying so."

I suppose the male-centric songwriting subject that permeates Swift's discography contained covert feminism and that we just didn't see that. Perhaps, the "Bad Blood" song and music video were written only in jest and not about poor Katy Perry, for Swift, as a feminist, would "never make it a girl fight" or tear other women down (though all Katy did was date your terrible ex-boyfriend and allegedly steal three backup dancers from your tour). In 2013, Swift said, in response to Tina Fey and Amy Poehler's joke towards her serial dating, "There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women."
There was that time in 2015 Taylor said that Nicki Minaj was "invited to any stage [she is] on" (as if Taylor expects to have access to every stage, award, and platform that Nicki might not otherwise have as a black female artist...yikes!) in response to Nicki's criticism of the white + thin VMA nominations. Later, Nicki responded with confusion, as Swift continued, "It’s unlike you to pit women against each other. Maybe one of the men took your slot..". Of course, this 'beef' was 'squashed' when Nicki performed with Taylor at the VMAs, with Nicki quite literally only having 38 seconds of stage time without Taylor. Maybe all that parading around with a legion of famous white women - similar to the way Taylor might've done with her numerous 1989-era handbags - was in fact a stance against gender inequality, and that this display of "girl power" should be enough to constitute Swift as a feminist icon.
Even while Swift says that Dunham informed her feminist outlook, she dances around the exact contents of those beliefs: "what she believes, what she says, what she stands for" is not exactly insightful towards what beliefs Swift might have inherited. Taylor never broaches women's rights topics such femicide, FGM, forced pregnancy & marriage, sex trafficking, women in slavery, women's financial and political oppression, women's educational rights, women's health, or women's autonomy, so we can assume she only gives a fuck about "girls supporting girls" (whatever that fucking means).
Despite some questionable (and sometimes vindictive) behavior, Taylor as a young woman did not deserve every media lashing that she received. We cannot deny that most headlines and criticisms perpetuated a misogynistic rhetoric which has plagued Swift for a majority of her career. Acknowledging events such as the development of her ED, her sexual assault trial, "Famous" lyric and MV depiction of Taylor, and the explicit Twitter deepfakes, for example, as both disgusting and unfortunate things that happened to a young woman in Hollywood does not negate the fact that Taylor is mostly a performative feminist.

Get Your Fucking Ass Up and Be a Philanthropist, It Seems Like Nobody Wants to Be a Philanthropist These Days

In 2013, Taylor Swift cut the ribbon at the grand opening of the Taylor Swift Education Center at the Country Music Hall of Fame in Nashville, Tennessee. The donation amount - $4 million - was the largest individual artist gift ever donated to the Country Music Hall of Fame, which is, of course, mentioned on Swift's website. The two-story facility features three classrooms, an instrument room, and an interactive children's exhibit gallery. Swift also performed at "All for the Hall" charity shows and has donated numerous artifacts from her career (such as notable guitars, tour costumes, etc) to the museum.
This was over 11 years ago, and it is still the only notable philanthropic contribution Taylor Swift has made.
For a woman of her net worth and stature, and a woman who recognizes the difficulties for women in film and music, you would think that Taylor Swift might establish a scholarship program for women to study the arts or something. Perhaps Swift might even consider becoming a member of organizations that support female artists, or one that supports LGBTQ+ causes (since she is now proudly an ally), yet she remains superficial with her graces. Broader philanthropy, such as donating relief aid to Palestinian women or women impacted by violence and discrimination will probably never receive any financial support from Miss Swift because then she'd be using her money towards philanthropies involving anyone but white entertainers.
She even says herself in Miss Americana, "My entire moral code as a kid and now is a need to be thought of as 'good'." Well, she's certainly thought of as good, though her actions say otherwise. She's more than happy to do a vaguely altruistic song and dance for a clip-worthy interview quote and mass appeasement, then fuck off to one of her mansions on a 20 minute private jet flight, rather than actually contribute to anything pertaining to the causes she has endorsed. Yet, far too many people continue to give a woman such as her their money, time, and energy, and she hoards these resources to herself.

I Like Some of the Taylor's Songs, But What the Fuck Does She Know About Feminism?

Swift continued with her self-proclaimed feminist campaign, positioning herself as a political activist and LGBTQ+ ally in the Miss Americana documentary. The primary focus of the documentary consists of the sexual assault trial, Andrea Swift's cancer diagnosis, Taylor's ED and body dysmorphia, media scrutiny, and, largely, finally speaking up about her politics publicly, mostly her opposition to the 2018 Tennessee Republican senate candidate, Marsha Blackburn, and Blackburn's beliefs. Swift says, following a scene discussing her experience during the trial,

"I just couldn't really stop thinking about it. And I just thought to myself, next time there is any opportunity to change anything, you had better know what you stand for and what you want to say."

We must ask ourselves, though: when has Swift ever spoken up to change anything? Okay, pulling her entire catalogue from Spotify because they didn't pay their artists enough and similarly pulling her catalogue from Apple Music are changes that she leveraged due to her revenue potential and power, but they are not pertinent to the average woman's rights. Moreover, these are issues that directly impacted Taylor's income, which was enough reason for her to protest in the first place. Swift has sold the most units for a female artist in first week sales, is the first female artist with 100k monthly Spotify listeners, is the first female artist to win the Album of the Year Grammy 4 times, and is the first female artist to do X, Y, and Z, all while being inoffensive and family-friendly to boot. The actual Taylor Swift seems unwilling to compromise the brand of Taylor Swift by contributing in meaningful ways to feminist causes, especially if it is for women outside of America and Hollywood.
The reason political anthems such as "The Man" and "Only the Young" of the Lover era feel disingenuous and corporate is because, well, it is. Taylor has taken every opportunity to advance her career or public image at the expense of other women. What is truly genuine to Taylor's outlook on other women is vying for male attention, taking down female competition, and vocalizing feminist injustices only if they directly impact her and her money. Some will argue that it's satisfactory for a woman with such a huge platform to even TALK about feminism, but that just isn't enough. It's even less impressive when you candidly look at the scope of her feminist lens: "If I was the man, then I'd be THE MAN", or "I really resent the ‘Be careful, buddy, she’s going to write a song about you’ angle, because it trivialises what I do", and, of course, "We all got crowns". Feminism, but only when it happens to me. It gets worse when you look at Taylor's track record of copying other famous women and removing other female artists as potential threats to her pop prowess.
It's good for PR to align yourself with certain blanket feminist and political beliefs, therefore good for branding, therefore good for ticketing and merchandise sales, therefore good for business. And Taylor Swift is a business.
She's not a feminist. Taylor Swift is a capitalist.

I Can't Pay Those Sweatshop Workers a Livable Wage or Benefits! How Else Would I Make My Billions?

Recently, Taylor's team filed to trademark the phrase "Female Rage: The Musical" after Taylor said during Paris N1 of the Eras Tour,

"So you were the first ones to see The Tortured Poets at the Eras Tour...or as I like to call it, 'Female Rage: The Musical'."

This trademark petition was filed last week on Saturday, and news comes about just as numerous unofficial fan-made merch designs have cropped up with this phrase plastered on Fruit of the Loom basics. I'm of the opinion Swift's team motioned for a trademark so that they can send out cease & desists to all those that make knockoff merch, which disrupts potential sales for Bravado, UMG's choice merchandising company; however, since it was filed earlier, perhaps Swift has bigger plans with the bizarre use of the gendered phrase. One Swiftie referred to the phrase "female rage" as "a funny Eras Tour joke". Could it be a possible fourth version of the Eras Tour Movie? Whatever the reason, the motion to capitalize off of such a concept is disgusting, but not unsurprising, for a woman that profits on her vain feminism.
Swift, through her company, TAS Rights Managements, has also trademarked over 200 phrases, including "1989", where she owns the property rights to this calendar year on keychains, phone cases, sunglasses, stationary, bags, beverage ware, clothing, entertainment services, your subconscious, and, of course, Christmas ornaments.
The vapid consumerism in Swiftie culture is, frankly, disgusting. Bravado's sustainability statement is non-existent, the quality control is abysmal, and the materials they use are horrible. The materials, such as acrylic and polyester, are made from petrochemicals. This means they are non-renewable, shed microplastics, and are quite toxic in production. The manufacturing process to make all of those lazy-rushed Eras Tour logo graphic tees is a huge blow to environmental well-being. Apparently, though, Swifties don't give a fuck. They sell out products in seconds and either have to face the manufactured scarcity or buy from a scalper that resells for 200% of the already ridiculous retail price. This doesn't include the environmental impact of vinyl records, CD, and cassette production, of which Taylor produces many variants that sell unsustainable amounts.
If we're talking about women's rights violations, why is no one acknowledging the women that work in the inhumane sweatshop conditions that have to pump out fugly t-shirts and hats? The millions of plastic microfiber dander they are inhaling, or the toxic dyes that touch their bare skin? Are they being compensated fairly for their skilled labour and are they in safe working environments? Do these women have minimal bargaining power, and do they have authority over their worker's rights? Is Taylor Swift female raging at their injustices? Does Taylor Swift ever feels bad that her wealth was built on the backs of women of color, disadvantaged by the demands of the global economy and garment industry? Do you think she ever says a little white feminist prayer for them before she goes to sleep at night?
What's even crazier is not that Taylor herself doesn't care, it's that Swifties don't care. There CANNOT BE ethical billionaires. You only make a billion dollars if you are exploiting other human beings for capital gain. Based on public perception of the possible "Female Rage: The Musical" trademark, it seems like Swifties are already asking for merch with this phrase. "If Taylor made it, I'd buy it." Oh, cool. So not only do you champion Miss Swift's avarice and billionaire status, but you also are unashamed to admit to your blind consumption of her music and merchandise, no matter where they might originate in production or sincerity. Just as Swift takes and takes and takes, Swifties' consumerism of Taylor Swift cannot be quelled.
The tortured artist's most vulnerable and sincere poetry...available now in 21 different versions!

I Am Tortured Poet, Hear Me Whinge

Look - even if Taylor's intention is to characterize TTPD as more "tortured" and "angry", the main thread of the album is "I was ghosted by my decade-long situationship with a controversial indie boy and my fucking stupid fans wrote a 'Speak Up Now' open letter prompting me to drop him" anger, which is adequately expressed in the lyrics and performances. The extent of Taylor's "female rage" on TTPD is on tracks such as "Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?", which contends with relentless media scrutiny; "But Daddy I Love Him", where Swift firmly states she'll date whoever she likes no matter how "Sarahs and Hannahs" may react; and "The Albatross", a track mythologizing her reputation and the consequences of dating her. Of course, these coincide with deep psychological wounds that formed during Swift's early years in the media, and so, from her feminist perspective, these subjects tackle the misogyny and double standards that she faced.
Yet Taylor Swift still has no grounds to be claiming that TTPD best exemplifies female rage and therefore she, in the context of this album, is female rage incarnate. As the daughter of a stock broker and mutual fund marketing executive, Taylor was born into wealth and allowed privileges like trips and subsequent relocation to Nashville all so that she might get a record deal. Her father even invested at least $120,000 into the then-fledgling label, Big Machine Records, which ensured Taylor's place with Borchetta after leaving her dead-end development deal with Sony. The fact that her parents were able to buy her a fucking brand new guitar for Christmas and pay for music lessons says so much about the financial security and safety of her childhood.
Money is privilege and protection, and despite Swift's experiences with misogyny and loser boyfriends, she does not know what female rage is.
Her rage is derived from her frustrations with her obsessive fans pulling the moral superiority card on Taylor in response to her rebound with Matty Healy. That's literally it. She's just pissed that the monster she created is no longer obediant, it's become a feral, sovereign entity that depletes the world of its natural resources and thinks it is more intelligent than it actually is because it's mommy has started to talk to it with big words. Apparently, 'illicit', 'elegy', 'nonchalant', and 'precocious' are considerably big words for the oafish monster, and I find it strange that this level of literacy is present in a group of fans that allegedly have GPAs of 3.5 or higher, but I digress.
Taylor Swift has never been one paycheck away from destitution. Taylor Swift has never experienced racial discrimination. She may have instances of gender discrimination, but she possesses the ideal white, blonde American beauty standard and therefore reaps the benefits of being a conventionally attractive woman. Taylor Swift has sufficient social capital. Taylor Swift is a billionaire woman prolonging her victimhood though she, as a woman, has mostly had control over her image and music (unlike her contemporaries). Taylor Swift is NOT entitled to be championed for her "female rage", nor should she be. Taylor Swift has never even been the struggling artist, for fuck's sake. I don't give a fuck if she's trying to fill the empty lunch tables of her past. Taylor Swift purporting herself, her unpolished album, and her lukewarm feminism as a musical bleeding with female rage is asinine.

Sigh Try and Come For My Job, Poors

Out there in the world right now is a 23-year-old woman, a recent college grad, who works as a barista. She has to wake up and get ready to go into a minimum wage job because she cannot get a job in her field. She doesn't have healthcare benefits or sick time, so she has to go into work no matter how she's feeling. All day long she is berated by vicious customers and creepy men, and, exhausted from being on her feet, she knows she has to go home to her shitty roommate that never does the dishes and her roommate's shitty dog. To comfort herself, she considers getting a treat, but thinks against it when she remembers that matcha lattes cost $15 and they taste like milky dirt. She knows that she needs to buy groceries this week, and so the woman resolves to go home, but notices that her gas tank is low. She goes to put gas in the car, but the pump stops at $27.86 because that's all that she has in her checking account. The woman, bereft and reeling, sinks into the driver's seat. "Well," she thinks, her head in her hands, "at least I don't have Taylor Swift's job. I just couldn't imagine."
Fame is somewhat of a choice. If at any moment Taylor feels that she is misunderstood, misconstrued, or overwhelmed by public opinion, she can LEAVE the public eye - Lord knows she has the retirement fund and residuals to do so. In "I Can Do It With a Broken Heart", the TTPD song about meeting the demands of your career-zenith mega-tour while in the relationship trenches, Taylor ends the song by rambling,

"You know you're good when you can even do it with a broken heart...you know you're good...and I'm good, cause I'm miserable, and no one even knows!...try and come for my job."

Yeah, obviously we wouldn't know, you recently passed the billionaire threshold and are the most famous and in-demand performer in the world right now. Taylor Swift makes an estimated $10 to $13 million dollars A NIGHT on the Eras Tour. Furthermore, the Eras Tour movie grossed $261.6 million globally, (which, as the producer, Taylor takes home 57% of the ticket sales) not counting the streaming revenue from Amazon Prime Video and the estimated $75 million deal that Disney paid to have it on Disney+. We're not even considering the income from cheap plastic popcorn buckets and drink cups plastered with colored squares in her Era-specific likeness.
It's funny. Taylor Swift often said that being famous wasn't hard, that she "isn't complaining". I'm sure it is difficult to always have to present in a good mood, else you'll end up misrepresented in the media, and I'm sure it's invasive to virtually have no privacy or semblance of anonymity. Still, Taylor Swift shows up each night of tour and performs. For a majority of her career, she has penned her sad songs while on the road. Most of "Red", her breakup album, was written in the thick of the Speak Now World tour. Now, some Swifties say they almost "feel bad" for attending the Eras Tour with Swift's revelations in this song, that they have had a 'dimmed experience' upon hearing Taylor's misery whilst performing. Despite the fact that Taylor said that "this was the happiest she's ever been" at Gilette Stadium in May, the lyrics "boohoo, woe is me, smile for the cameras and make the fans happy!!!" are jarring for Eras attendees.
While Taylor Swift was making double-digit millions a night in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil and feeling miserable, Ana Clara Benevides Machado passed away due to heat exposure. The concert promoters, Time For Fun, are now the subject of a criminal investigation due to their lack of adequate hydration and safety. Taylor Swift cancelled the Sunday show that was to follow and offered VIP tent tickets to Benevides Marchado's family, which was a kind gesture, but perhaps incongruous to the incident of which they were offered as consolation. Everyone grieves differently, of course, but I'm not sure attending the very show at the very same venue that my daughter or sister passed away in two days prior, where the singer CONTINUED the show despite her death, would be healthy for closure.
There was no female rage at the show as Swift never saw Benevides Machado pass out. There was no female rage towards the disregard for fans as humans while Swift elected to proceed with her Brazil tour dates despite the country being in historic heatwaves (at risk of overheatting herself). If Taylor Swift was so shaken by touring with a broken heart or a fan's passing, she wouldn't have added an additional North American leg of Eras just two months after the Matty breakup. She's brokenhearted but willing to mend the cracks with your money and move onward with her worldwide female rage induced pillaging.
No matter what happens, even if you die at a Taylor Swift concert, Taylor collects a big fat check and flies away. She doesn't know you as anything other than a conversion rate or earning potential despite what her nearly 20-year long parasocial relationship with fans might otherwise indicate. She knows that, while some Swifties are without disposable income, they feel obligated to spend on a "48 Hours Only!" exclusive vinyl variant instead of necessities because they are so entrenched in Taylor Swift's intoxicating celebrity, they'll prioritize materialistic fandom before their needs. This is good enough for her because this means she can expand her real estate portfolio and finance her cat's lavish lifestyles. They're worth an estimated $100 million dollars. Her three cats could pool their net worth and solve world hunger.
While you and I might be denied bereavement leave and barely surviving the current political and economic climate, Taylor Swift has to, instead of gets to, perform for stadiums at full attendance for three nights in a row across the globe. You and I might be replaced by AI at our longtime jobs, but Taylor Swift is threatened with losing more and more money each time you listen to a "Stolen Version" of her songs. If we don't buy every variant of all of her albums, then who is going to pay for the fucking cats?
It is tone deaf to spend as she spends and lives as she lives in this economy, but this is her reality. She was able to donate $100,000 to all of her tour truck drivers, and that's wonderful, but it leads me to wonder about the ethos of the 2020s where one woman can hoard such life-changing amounts of money. Remember in 2014 when she gave a fan $90 ($120 in today's money) to get Chipotle because she had no fucking clue how much it cost? This is a 34-year-old woman who is increasingly out of touch with the reality for working class people and women in general. Normal everyday adults must wake up and go to their thankless jobs, and yet Taylor Swift, despite all her riches, incessantly references the lows of her life and career as a public figure and entertainer to farm sympathy and drive sales. And still, the corporate women have latched onto "I cry a lot, but I am so productive! It's an art!" as their cubicle battle cry.
Do you think that, from up in her private jet, Taylor Swift gazes at the world through her poetic, tortured eyes, and thinks, "All the little people, in their cars, walking, going about their lives...all those girls that don't support girls...do they know that I've made an album about female rage?"

Conclusion/TLDR

Thank you for reading. I would love to hear your critical insights towards this entire ordeal: TTPD, the trademark, the implications of it all.
TLDR: Taylor Swift is a bad feminist and is delusional to think that the TTPD eras set exemplifies female rage at women's injustice.

I wont say names or anything for privacy. Me (16M) and my gf (16F) have been dating for over a year and a half now. With ldr theres always trust issues and I am an anxious person who over thinks alot but I've been able to put most of it aside. I am a virgin because around the time I started caring about girls I met her and haven't looked another womans way since. She has a past and I won't go into it, again privacy reasons. I've been down dark roads and I've come close to suicide about 2 years ago but I've mostly been past it with a few terrible thoughts here and there. From where we live there's an exact 6 hour time gap so there have been alot of nights were im staying up too 6-7 am just so we can talk. I love her more than I've loved anything but I don't know if I can move on. She has a friend, they constantly say I love you and give pet names which I understand can just be what friends say. But she's posted multiple posts about this friend saying she loves her and can't live without her. She recently made a new one which I wasn't aloud to view and had to make an alt to see it. She said she was folding over how much she loved this woman and how she wants to marry her. This could be all because there friends but I feel threatened by her. What should I do?

Is there any HAL employees on here or anyone who knows about the details for the friend on board benefit?
I did it once with a friend last year, and we only had to submit the application 14 days in advance to get it approved.
I just submitted another form with my partner on a different ship, and they denied the first request because it wasn’t 30 days in advance (not sure if the rules changed?)… so we resubmitted for different dates that was over 30 days in advance and got no response. He sent a follow up email 2 weeks ago and got no response. Still nothing.
We’re long distance/from different countries and we’ve been waiting 6 months to see each other, and at this point ready to end things because of how difficult it’s getting, and not knowing when we’ll see each other again. Any info would be appreciated.

I’ve been training for my first 70.3 (also my first triathlon) for the past ~6 months, and the race is in less than 4 weeks!
For multiple reasons, I’ve prioritized longer days at easy-moderate intensity.
The longest workouts I’ve hit so far include: -80 mile ride (100 coming this weekend). -14 mile run. -3200 yard swim.
My question is, am I “that far” from having the fitness to complete a full distance?
I’m training for a long road ride a month after the 70.3 which is 120 miles with 11k feet of gain (hence why I’ve done these longer rides).
All of this got me thinking….. maybe a full distance in the early Fall wouldn’t be crazy…
I always thought maybe I’d do a whole separate build for a full distance some day, but now I’m considering trying to just roll my fitness straight into it. Is this a reasonable idea, why or why not?

I '24 F' am dating my boyfriend '25 M' for over a year now. We did long distance for over 7 months in this one year. He did not come to drop me off at the airport whilst I was leaving saying he's got family commitments and when when I was coming back finally after 6 long months, he didn't come to pick me up either saying he's at work.
Now that I am looking for a flat for myself, he's telling me on call on how to go and clean the place before I move in, and take one luggage at a time instead of saying that he will help me with the moving.
I have moved to this country completely new to this place, my boyfriend is from here, for once he didn't tell me that he will come over and help.
I feel he is doing this on his own convenience. It is bothering me so much???

So, I got my first HRT prescription and you know, for funsies, I read the clinical studies paperwork that came with it. And honestly, I was surprised that so much came out of this study, and that the numbers were so small to have caused such an uproar and have left women without hormonal support for so long.
I am no researcher, but I do like research, so this may be off as statistics class was a long time ago (if you see an error here, please let me know).
So let’s take a look at the study that kicked this off, Risks and Benefits of Estrogen Plus Progestin in Healthy Postmenopausal Women: submitted to The Journal of the American Medical Association, 2002
It was a randomized controlled primary prevention trial:
Original Plan:

• · 16,608 women over 8.5 years
• · Ages: 50-79
• · Mean age: 63
• · 83.9% white
• · 6.5% black
• · 5.5% Hispanic
• · Prior hormone use: 73.9% never
• · 89.9% pregnant at least once

However, the research ended early, 4 years later with 15,576 women still participating.
Outcomes:
Cardiovascular Disease:
Cardiovascular disease: 164 on protocol vs. 122 placebo out of 15,576 women. The total percentage of women who experienced cardiovascular disease in the study was approximately 1.84%
So, approximately 1.05% of women on the protocol (HRT) experienced cardiovascular disease, while approximately 0.78% of women on placebo experienced cardiovascular disease.
The percentage difference between the percentage of women who experienced cardiovascular disease on the protocol (HRT) and placebo is 0.27%.
…
Stroke:
Stroke 127 vs 85 out of 15,576 women
The overall percentage of women who experienced stroke in the study was approximately 1.36%. Approximately 0.815% of women on the protocol (HRT) experienced stroke, while approximately 0.546% of women on placebo experienced stroke.
The difference in percentage between the protocol (HRT) and placebo groups was approximately 0.269%. Approximately 0.23% of women had strokes during the study period.
The baseline risk of stroke for women who do not use HRT is 1%, using HRT might increase that risk to somewhere between 1.2% and 1.5%.
To give you a sense of perspective, compare these numbers to the study, Cigarette Smoking and Risk of Stroke in Middle-Aged Women which examined the incidence of stroke in relation to cigarette smoking in a prospective cohort study of 118,539 women 30 to 55 years of age and free from coronary heart disease, stroke, and cancer.
Compared to non-smokers, women who smoked 1 to 14 cigarettes per day had their risk of stroke increased by approximately 120%, and women who smoked 25 or more cigarettes per day had their risk increased by approximately 270%.
The baseline risk of stroke for women who do not smoke is 1%, but smoking 1 to 14 cigarettes per day might increase that risk to approximately 2.2%, and smoking 25 or more cigarettes per day might increase it to around 3.7%
Yet we can buy a pack of cigarettes over the counter, no questions asked, and totally legal!
…
I ran out of time today to make comparative research analysis on risks, so the rest are just a comparison within the same 2002 study.
...
Venous thromboembolic disease:
151 vs. 67 out of 15,576 women
The overall percentage of women who experienced venous thromboembolic disease (VTE) in the study was approximately 1.40%.
Approximately 0.970% of women on the protocol (HRT) experienced VTE, while approximately 0.430% of women on placebo experienced VTE.
The difference in percentage between the protocol (HRT) and placebo groups was approximately 0.540%.
...
Invasive Breast Cancer:
166 on protocol vs. 124 placebo out of 15,576 women
The overall percentage of women who experienced stroke in the study was approximately 1.86%.
Approximately 1.07% of women on the protocol (HRT) experienced stroke, while approximately 0.80% of women on placebo experienced stroke.
The difference in percentage between the protocol (HRT) and placebo groups was approximately 0.27%.
…
You may have a different opinion on this, but these numbers are EXCEEDINGLY low to have caused such an impact. And, the study has some real issues that need to be considered:

• · Lack of diversity
• · Did not test for under 50 or perimenopausal
• · One 1 protocol
• · One oral route of transmission
• · Two meds at one time meaning unable to determine which was doing what
• · Study ended 4 years early
• · High rate of drop outs during study

...
And, in my research today, I stumbled across this interesting anecdote:
The Women’s Health Initiative; HRT and Surveillance, Epidemiology, and End Results Data
Submitted to the journal Cancer in 2020

SEER*stat 8.3.6 is a statistical tool used to analyze cancer data. In this study, researchers looked at the rates of invasive breast cancer from 1992 to 2014, focusing on different groups of women.
They found that for White women under 80 years old who have Medicare insurance, the rates of breast cancer started to decrease before the year 2000, possibly even as early as 1992. This suggests that something other than a particular medical finding in 2001 (called the WHI publication) might have influenced the decline in breast cancer rates among these women.
The study also talks about how changes in population demographics, like people living longer, can affect how we interpret cancer rates. The researchers mention that adjusting for age over a long period of time might make it seem like cancer rates have increased among Black women over 40 years. However, their analysis shows that this isn't true, and in fact, breast cancer rates among Black women have been rapidly declining since 2012.
Another point discussed is hormone replacement therapy (HRT), a treatment used to relieve symptoms of menopause. A separate study found that there were significant decreases in the number of HRT prescriptions for women over 50 years old during certain time periods. Despite this decrease, there wasn't a clear link between HRT and breast cancer rates.
In summary, the findings suggest that factors other than hormone replacement therapy may be influencing breast cancer rates, and there may be more to understand about the trends in breast cancer among different groups of women.
I wrote this out and tried to put it in layman’s terms because I see still a persistent concern about whether HRT is right for us based on earlier research. I sought to put this out in this way with actual numbers that might help others have a truly informed opinion, and hey, perhaps you can show this to your health provider because it does make you wonder-do actually read the research forming the basis of their opinions?
Again, I do not work in a lab, or do science for work or anything like that, so if you see a mistake, or have something to add, I would love to hear it!

Hey everyone, this is my first ever post on Reddit.
I'm 28 currently living in Portugal, and I could really use some advice regarding my long-distance relationship. I met this amazing girl from Russia online, and we've been together for three years (We both speak russian). We've met in person twice during this time (two weeks each time). Those meetings that we had were truly amazing and unforgettable. We've spent countless hours together on Discord everyday, even falling asleep on voice chat every night for three years (and 3 months). We played games, watched movies, series, anime, videos on Youtube, Tiktoks. We deeply loved each other, but we've been struggling to figure out our future together.
The main issue in our relationship was that we couldn't decide what to do next, how to bridge the distance between us. She couldn't come to Portugal for an extended period due to personal reasons, including sick mother and financial constraints. She proposed various solutions, like trying to move to a third country together, maybe somewhere in the Baltics, or waiting another two years and then her coming to Portugal. However, the solution she really wanted was for us to move to Kaliningrad (a city in Russia located in Europe), live there for a couple of years, and then potentially move to Portugal or another country. I wanted her to come visit for a month or two, and then, being together, we could figure out what to do next. But she couldn't just come for a short period because of her job; she couldn't afford to lose it due to financial reasons.
I rejected all her suggestions at the time, but I couldn't fully explain why. Perhaps I was afraid. After many discussions, we decided to break up. However, we tried to spend less time together online, and I even refused a couple of times. But it was difficult without her, and I would often invite her to spend time together, just like she did many times. During the month after our breakup, she once suggested getting back together, but I refused, fearing we'd end up back in the same situation of uncertainty about our future. She hinted a couple more times that we should get back together, but I ignored her.
Over time, I began to realize that our breakup was a huge mistake and that I love her deeply and I'm willing to do anything for our future together. I realized I was afraid to take any serious steps towards our future. Exactly a month after we broke up, I decided to tell her how much I love her and how much I've reconsidered in my life, and that I'm ready to do whatever it takes for our future together. But she refused. She said I should have done it sooner and that she's afraid to trust again, afraid that I might change my mind again, as we almost broke up a year ago for the same reason (I was very worried that it would be difficult for us to start a life together). This rejection hit me very hard, and I'm incredibly hurt and devastated that I missed my chance at happiness and I know that i made her incredibly hurt and devastated.
I've been trying to talk to her, trying to explain that I was a fool and I was wrong, that I love her very much and I'm willing to do anything for us to be together. And for the past week, I've been trying to make things right, but she's very clear and straightforward in her refusal, and I don't know what to do.
I would appreciate any advice or insight you all might have. Thank you.

So the goal here is a wheel/tire splashing through a puddle in slow slow motion. The end animation needs to be 120 frames in length at 24fps. Obviously the fluid sim works in real time so the wheel going the full distance, blender interprets that as a slow moving wheel, not a fast moving one in slow motion. The second picture is the result I need EXCEPT, this animation is only 10 frames long. The water reacts as it would for a wheel moving fast but I cannot slow it down due to it only totally 10 frames. Simply changing the time scale doesn’t work because it just makes the fluid flow slower but the wheel still pushes it in real time. Happy to elaborate more if needed! Thanks in advance for any help!

Disclaimer: This is not confirmed content, just an idea i had (please don't ban me again mods)
All of the Titanfall players are gonna love this one.
Name: (I actually need a name, can't make up my mind)
Homeworld: Harmony
Gender: Male
Height: 6ft 1in
Weight: 315lbs
Allegiance: Unknown
Background: Pilot
Class: Assault
_______________________________________________________________________________________________ Passive Ability:
Advance Movement

• 5 seconds of Wall-running
  
• a Double Jump takes 2 seconds off
  
• double jump cannot be used again until after they touch down or wall run again
  
• Double jump reduces active speed by 7%
  
• Recharges after a 2 second delay and recharges at a rate of 2 to 1 (2 seconds charge = 1 second wall run)
  
• any jumping or falling will start the recharge delay again
  
• Wall run and jump mechanics are almost identical to that of Titanfall 2 but with a 50% reduction on how fast you can build up speed
  
• reload and switch speed when wall-running is reduced by 20%
  

Notes: It will take 50% longer to build up a crazy amount of speed making it smart to build up speed in advance by any means (super glide, sliding down a hill, grenade boost, jump pad, jumping off a zip line, etc) The audio of Wall-runing is also very audible, as loud as a Vantage Tactical. The double jump by default has a 30 degree angle that you can change direction without loss of too much speed.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Tactical:
Phase Rewind

• When activated it will send you back in the exact movement you did from the last 2 seconds
  
• takes .5 second to activate and applies the same slowness that Wraith has when activating her phase
  
• 30 second cooldown
  
• the phase does not highlight enemies or even show them while phased (similar to the old phase shift)
  

Notes: The 2 second time makes it useful only for sudden pushes into a room/fight and not during the fight, making it a bit better than Wraiths phase, but significantly harder to use as the timing has to be really good and you have no way of controlling where you're going to go. Not being able to see enemies while phasing also helps balance it.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Ultimate:
Radar Jammer

• Lasts 25s
  
• sends out a white pulse in a 100m radius
  
• enemies can no longer ping
  
• mini map has static covering it
  
• compass no longer works
  
• Ring Consoles no longer work
  
• Cannot Scan care packages
  
• Cooldown: 4 minutes
  

Notes: The 100m radius makes it good for pushing an enemy from a distance and right before a gun fight, the long cooldown and short duration makes it a bit more balanced. Recon Legends are not effected by the Ult and can Use Survey Beacons to counteract it for their teammates. Any scanning by legends (Bloodhound's Scan, Crypto's drone, Vantages Ult, and Seers scan) will not show up for allies when Ult is active until a Survey Beacon is scanned or the ult expires.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________
Level 2 Upgrades:
Jump Kit Mod 1: Recharge Delay reduced by 1 second, passive charge increased by 2 seconds, passive recharge rate increased to 1.25 seconds every 2 seconds.
Jump Kit Mod 2: Slide speed and distance increased by 20%, Double Jump movement penalty removed, double jump only consumes 1 second charge.
Level 3 Upgrades:
Data Knife: Gain access to Survey Beacons. Melee walls to wall hang. (3 seconds of wall hanging uses 1 second of passive charge), must jump off wall or run out of charge to cancel.
EOD Pilot: Frag Grenades will now start their timer upon holding fire when selected, grenade damage taken by held grenades is reduced to 30, the damage taken will regenerate over the course of 15 seconds. Enemies do not get damage reduction from held grenades, grenade will only deal damage until 1 hp is reached.
Notes: The EOD Pilot perk could also be used to turn yourself into a homing missile lol.
Feedback is encouraged, what can I change? What might seem too broken?
I will post another one with any changes after sufficient feedback is given.

I’m feeling lost and looking for advice.
31f and in an 8 year relationship with partner 32m. Over time I feel like the beauty of our relationship was that I kept falling in love with him in a new way. We have an amazing life together and I love him very much. I’m worried I’m not in love any more. I don’t feel desired by him, or maybe I don’t desire him any more.
We are halfway through selling, and buying a house.
He wants a baby and I’m not sure whether I do. I’m finding it really hard to decide with the body clock time pressure and the irreversibility of the decision. As well as it being an unintentional ultimatum or our relationship.
I don’t know whether I’m cut out for a traditional relationship. I’ve always been bi-curious but I’ve never been with a woman. Again the decision to stay and have a baby feels all or nothing.
I’m finding myself romanticising non-traditional lifestyles and people on my life who embody these lifestyles. People with less traditional relationships: polyamory, people in long distance relationships.
In the past year or two I have become more happy and independent within my relationship than I ever have been. I took time to travel independently and develop new hobbies and forms of expression. I think my partner may have been unintentionally hurt by or not immediately understanding of the solo travel but he also came round to the idea. Normally in relationships I can be quite co-dependent and feel I am losing a part of myself.
I have a history of staying in relationships too long when I know they should end. I’m a serial monogamist.
I think he can tell I’m distant and he deserves to know what’s on my mind but I can’t begin to express it when I’m not even sure what’s going on myself.
I don’t know if I’m just having a panicked response to the level of commitment bringing a child into the world requires. I know we have something precious, we’ve built a life together over the past 8 years. Or if I really want to explore these new routes and possibilities; I don’t want to live with regret and not see myself reach my full potential/expression/identity/courage.
I feel distressed by this, there’s probably things I haven’t mentioned but any advice is really welcome. Thank you
TL:DR Don’t know whether to stay in committed relationship and have a baby or leave and follow a new path exploring my independence.

You know what they say, if at first you don't succeed....... something or another (P.S. pictures of me on my profile)
Searching for the "one" isnt easy, but what can we do aye? First things first, to throw some random bits of info out there about me! (Info dump incoming 😂)
I'm 24 and biracial! Half Irish and half African/northern Indian, and I'm living in the UK!
I'm approximately 6'0"-6'1" in height and id say an average/kept build. I also have somewhat long-ish hair for a guy, going near my shoulders, it's naturally straight! I also have a well kept somewhat shorter and neat beard :) I also have very fair skin. I guess I took physically more from one side of my heritage 😂🤌 I'm also a Muslim lad! So just putting that out there too for the sake of it.
I do enjoy binging on junk food but between my high metabolism and my physically active job working as an electrician (which I'm trying to fully establish myself in) I tend to never put any weight on 🤷
So! What am I looking for? Well it's a long shot. I'd like to imagine something like the female version of myself. My other half. Someone I find attractive, kind, easy going, fun to get along with, can hold a conversation without making it feel like a one sided effort and chore. Etc!
Important note!!!
IF you are not from the UK. Be aware relocating doesn't appear to be an option for me currently 😅 so bear that in mind please. I am open to a potential long distance but again. There's that.
I guess I'm the hopeless romantic type. Fantasising about soulmates, something real, serious, natural and everything great. Is that easy to obtain these days? Bruh. HECK no 😭 but can a guy try? Well, here's to hoping I suppose. Guess only time will tell
Anyone between the ages of 20-27 is welcome! Anyone who wants to actually get to know each other and dreams about something sincere and real! (With some fun stupidity and jokes thrown in there of course, that banter is a must🗿👍)
I like a woman with a little bit of confidence ya know? Probably one of the most attractive personality traits, who can hold a conversation and engage with the other person you know? Nothing more off putting than someone who gives single worded dead replies lol
Here's a bit more about me. My hobbies! my hobbies are various. I'd argue I'm an ambivert. Though my main hobbies lean towards something a little more introverted. You have hiking and the likes as well as going out with friends and driving around at night with them, but then you also have gaming which is a huge hobby of mine!!
So yeah! There's my shot being let out. I'd say I consider myself to be an honest and open book and would like someone who is open, honest and sincere in the same way!
Oh! And my preferred platform is Snap (:
So. Here's to hoping!

Hey everyone I just wanna ask a question. I have an american boyfriend and we are in a long distance relationship . We'll, his co workers are girls and sometimes she's alone with one girl. Should I be bothered????

It has been a lot. More than it has ever been in my life. I made it out alive. I made it out alive from the biggest battle, I could have ever imagined. I was pretty sure, it would take the best of me, I was committed to that, it would take me. I was pretty sure, I would never write a letter again. I was pretty sure, I would not breathe again.
I was in somewhere else for a long while.
And now I'm in here. Back in here, back in Trench.
I'm sorry, my frens, that I have been distant. I love your torches over here, the fact you are in here.
I heard this song some weeks ago from distance. In the beginning it repeats a sentece in different languages. The lines goes like
Diese kleine heimliche Insel hat mich zu einer Waffe gemacht Wir glauben beide Cette petite île étrange a fait de moi une arme Nous croyons tous les deux que nous pouvons L'utiliser pour changer l'élan de cette guerre)Esta pequeña isla espeluznante me ha convertido en un arma Ambos creemos que podemos usarla para cambiar el impulso de esta guerra
I believe, it all means that "this secret little island turned me into a weapon. We both believe, we can use it to change the momentum of this war."
In my language, which I have always known, it would be "Tämä pieni salainen saari teki minusta aseen. Me molemmat uskomme, että sitä voi käyttää sodankäynnin muuttumiseen."
Leaves, trees and grass has turned into green. Sky is more blue and the air is filled with more dust to breathe. Dandelions are reborning from the weirdest places I could ever expect them to do so.
It feels like they didn't do that last year, like they skipped it. Did I skip it? This year, they are more yellow, more green, more dusty than ever before. The sky is more open than ever before.
I didn't understood that I'm in Trench again. Until this day. I have been away from everywhere for so long. I believe, that that secret little island turned me into a weapon. We both believe, we can use it to change the mometum of this war. Still not sure, if that was their message, but I'm feeling it. But yeah. Welcome back to Trench. I wrote a song few weeks ago, a way before these dandelions showed up.
"How are you doing?" thanks, for not asking, I just visited your collegue told her "I might have a colic but otherwise, I'm at my peak" she looked at me with inch of pity or then it was just me in a slight problem of reflection on her synthetic domination
I'm bothered by expect to behave at my age
when today I was too tired to even do my lace
I wouldn't like to care if I left behind my left Vans
but now I know I would have to buy new shoes
and there's no chance, I would learn to run over again
especially when I would have to do it with this shame
It was my time, to pick up my fight it was dark and cold, in the night your silver dashes gave me the light you looked like a bee when you cried through your lences while I prayed, "please don't let anyone tell me I didn't try" and you said, "it doesn't matter, anyway you have known it all in each of your ruins, and I have told it to you thousand of times, don't look at them they don't know a shit look at me instead, let's sit with it."
I've been running I've been running stop, repeat
I taste on my tongue, drop of drool knowing damn well, I could suck a pool of it, if it has no chlorine in it ironic, innit? when we know I like to spit instead of sucking it up, what it even means, a thug?
So, dad, are you proud of me now?
Mom, is this where you pointed your arrow? (at)
Brother do you think you know me so well,
is it still me, and red dead redemption and dwell?
It was my time, to pick up my fight it was dark and cold, in the night your silver dashes gave me the light you looked like a bee when you cried through your lences while I prayed, "please don't let anyone tell me I didn't try" and you said, "it doesn't matter, anyway you have known it all in each of your ruins, and I have told it to you thousand of times, don't look at them they don't know a shit look at me instead, let's sit with it."
I've been running I've been running stop, play
Wondering down the streets wandering through my schemes I wasn't fine with most of the things at the ends of the my past's strings I let it go, my palms still bleed but now I see, I need to feed myself, pay my bills if I really care about if I actually agree with the plot
I'm fighting in between paying for new you
or buying the pair of socks and few
slices of cheese, instead
It was my time, to pick up my fight it was dark and cold, in the night your silver dashes gave me the light you looked like a bee when you cried through your lences while I prayed, "please don't let anyone tell me I didn't try" and you said, "it doesn't matter, anyway you have known it all in each of your ruins, and I have told it to you thousand of times, don't look at them they don't know a shit look at me instead, let's sit with it." '
What if I don't wanna sit anyway, I'm running again, straight into the forest well, I don't want to sit at least today each tree looks the same, I look for thickest to run directly against so I can pass out and resist moving on come on tell me one more time "it's time to sit, my friend"
On rewind
Drowning in your honey
like I never need to obey
It has always been my time, always picking my fight it is always dark and cold, it is always the night your silver dashes grew along, in a different light someone like you will always look like a bee and cry someone like me will always circle and think they didn't even try and the dying bees will keep telling it;
"are you done running from today? let's sit with it,
oh you are flying, by the dangerous bend symbol again?
for who you gave the remote, on your last refrain?"

There's the thickest tree with the marks of destruction
before I collapse, I wonder how bees works in isolation
buzzz.....

Please, tell me again, that old story you have "

I miss B. She was something else. But I know it is my time to stand up again, and look at myself as I am, from the reflection of the puddle, here in Trench. It is my time to come back, and overtake my formerself.
B always told me, that I have everything I need, it all is built inside me. It is hard to believe, when I'm cold at nights, but I know she is correct. My song is written for B. I need to stand in here, and wait for the torches, my responsability is to lit up my torch. We are in here. Like we have always been.
Welcome back to Trench, A. Welcome back to Trench, with all of it's terror, insecurities, colours and sounds. And torches. I'm still alive.
Are you here with me? Are you still alive out there?
-A

Syria – After the fall of Germany, 9th January 1946 protests erupted in Syria calling for independence, reaching its peak 18th January. France answered by force, eventually killing over a thousand Syrians by January. Shukri al-Quwatli escaped French arrest and contacted Winston Churchill. As the Conference of Foreign Ministers was held in Paris, Syria became a point of discussion also, French military action was condemned by all and by diplomatic means France was forced to retreat from Syria and Lebanon and recognise their independence (15.2.1946). Britain used the crisis to strengthen its influence, however unlike OTL did to directly occupy Syria as events in Syria are at the same time as the Conference in Paris. The British promised the French they would withdraw as well. Syrian independence was officially declared on 14 June 1946.
In 1947 Syria held its first parliamentary election, and a year later Shukri al-Quwatli was re-elected president. Syria had a rocky relationship with neighbouring Hashemite monarchies. Nationalist Quwatli manoeuvred in more and more hostile relations between powers and its interests (US, UK, USSR). Syria opposed the partition of Palestine and co-founded “Arab Liberation Army''. Defeat in Palestine heavily damaged the popularity of Quwatli, he regained some of it by refusing singing of Armistice with Israel (unlike others) and voicing support to anti-American riots (Summer 1949 due to Taft’s recognition of Israel). 28 September 1949 Quwatli demoted army chief Husni al-Za'im and replaced him by Sami al-Hinnawi. Major is shift is that due to American non-intervention the US backed 1949 coup never occurs. Under international pressure an armistice was eventually signed between Syria and Israel in November 1949. No demilitarised zone in Golan Heights as OTL. Syria adopted a neutralist policy, seeking relations both with the British, USSR, India, USA and Yugoslavia, but was most seen as a pro-British state. Syria became close to Egypt after the Egyptian Revolution. In 1952 parliamentary elections brought victory for the oppositional People’s Party and the rise of Ba’ath and SSNP. April 1953 presidential election, as Syrian constitution limited president to two terms, Quwatli handpicked Sabri Al-Asali as his successor.
Egypt – 2-3 November 1945 anti-Jewish riots in Egypt, since it was still during the war, riots were violently put down by the British forces. Since 1946 large anti-British demonstrations and riots. During 1947 negotiations about British withdrawal were held, however collapsed after Winston Churchill’s opposition to withdraw troops as response massive violent anti-British riots erupted (June 1947), forcing Churchill to agree to withdrawal to Suez Canal but keeping there large force, Churchill attempted to sign treaty that would guarantee British presence in Suez, but Egyptians rejected it. By end of 1948, British presence was limited to the Suez area. May to 20 July 1949 (signing of armistice) war in Palestine. After the war anti-British sentiments grew. 3 January 1950 victory of conservative and nationalist Wafd party, Mostafa el-Nahas became the new prime minister. His government refused to push any important reforms and was also very corrupt, further strengthening resentment amongst Egyptian people. Unlike OTL CIA is not attempting to persuade Farouk into reforms (it was codenamed “Fat Fucker” LMAO) 17 November 1951 Nahas unilaterally abrogated the 1936 Anglo-Egyptian treaty, wave of nationalism, Britian refused to leave Suez, tensions escalated into Battle of Ismailia (25 February 1952) – a violent clash between Egyptian militias and British forces. 26 January 1952 news resulted in massive anti-British protests that set Cairo on fire and greatly damaged support of the king and government. Country fell into instability, the government was dismissed and several different ones followed, as in our reality.
The Free Officers Movement (formed already in the 1940s) successfully orchestrated the Egyptian Revolution (23 August 1952). Power was transferred to nine-member Revolution Command Council (RCC), king Farouk abdicated, went into exile and was replaced with regency. RCC launched large scale reforms: land, tax, reducing privileges of government officials. First post-revolutionary prime minister Aly Maher Pasha resigned due to disagreements with the military coming from his traditional political background. He was succeeded by Abd El-Razzak El-Sanhuri, legal scholar promoting transition to civilian rule (10 October). Political parties were purged, however due to Sanhuri’s influence not banned. During spring 1953, conflict between Sanhuri and Naguib escalated. Camps began to develop, one was represented by Naguib and his loyalists who aligned themselves with Muslim Brotherhood, and other headed by Nasser and Sanhuri, aligned with HADITU and Wafd.
Newly created Provisional National Assembly, approved a new secular constitution, Nasser was named president (18 July 1953) with support of Wafd and HADITU. In summer 1953 Muslim Brotherhood started large riots and demonstrations against the new constitution, they gained outside CIA support, as they were sceptical of Nasser’s alliance with HADITU. Power struggle between Naguib, who still had key positions in RCC continued.
Lebanon – 7 June 1946 withdrawal of French forces, independence declared already in 1943. Around 100,000 Palestinians came to Lebanon after the war. In 1951 prime minister Riad Al Solh survived assassination attempt and remained prime minister until 1952, when he was replaced by Chamoun with Saeb Salam. 18 September 1952 first president Bechara El Khoury forced to step down after anti-corruption protests, 23 September Camille Chamoun became president, under his leadership country experience growth and stability. Chamoun also secured the majority of power in his hands.
(Trans)Jordan– Achieved independence 25 November 1946, as in our reality a large number of Palestinian refugees and annexation of the West Bank. 20 July 1951 king Abdullah was assassinated by Palestinian radical. Prior to his assassination Britain unlike OTL supported Abdullah in promoting his other son Naif to become new heir (due to Britain being more anxious about losing influence, rather favouring openly pro-British monarch) Naif is unpopular amongst people due to being seen just as a British puppet. 1 January 1952 new constitution – Hashemite Kingdom of Jordan.
Iraq – Britain wants to maintain military presence in Iraq and Nuri al-Said his power, since 1946 large left-wing protests and strikes, that resulted in massacre of workers. Government instituted severe repression, banning Communist party and arresting many communists, including leadership. 29 March 1947 Salih Jabr became prime minister, under his rule 15 January 1948 Anglo-Iraqi treaty was signed, making Iraq de-facto British protectorate, Iraqi oil controlled by Iraq Petroleum Company. To protest this treaty massive protests erupted – Al-Wathbah uprising – all Iraqi opposition joined – Communist, Independence parties, Liberal and National Democrats. Salih’s government fell, and the prime minister escaped to London, the new government under Nuri responded with martial law and massive crackdowns, numerous massacres. This timeline demonstrations got so intense that in February British troops entered Iraq to “pacify” them. Parties involved unlike OTL were formally banned after 1948 uprising and Nuri consolidated his power and firm support of Britain. In 1948 Constitutional Union Party was formed by Nuri and it became dominant ruling party. Unlike OTL Nuri remained in position of prime minister since 1948 to 1952. After Palestine war, Nuri expelled all Jews from Iraq (1950). Since 1951 terms of treaty were changed with the new Labour government and Iraq got 50% of its oil revenue.
23 September - 23 December 1952 another major protests inspired by Egyptian revolution and Iranian protests erupted – Iraqi Intifada. Nuri was dismissed by regent Abd al-Ilah and replaced by reformist general Taha al-Hashimi (30 September), who negotiated with protestors. However, under British pressure Taha was ousted and replaced by general Nureddin Mahmud (3 December), who instead rejected negotiated terms, started harsh repressions and crushed the uprising. Power was transferred into civilian leadership after the 29 March 1953 unfree election, independent Mustafa Mahmud al-Umari became the new prime minister, while Nuri still controlled the country from the shadows. In May 1953 Faisal II assumed power as king. Since 1952 the idea of unification of Jordan with Iraq was often discussed.
Saudi Arabia – Nothing to change, post-war rise due to finding of oil revenues, US keeps close relations even under Taft. 9 November 1953 reign of king Saud began.
Oman&Muscat – Nothing significant in this period.
Kingdom of Yemen –failed al-Waziri coup attempt, Iman Yahia was killed (17 February 1948), however Ahmad bin Yahya ascended to the throne instead. Autocratic rule. He was opposed to the British.
British Arab Colonies – 1952 Trucial States Council formed, British supervised body.
Iran
Long Iranian Crisis
Occupied by Allied powers in 1943. Western powers are less keen to withdraw from Iran, due to the stronger Soviet Union (and also due to Churchill). According to treaty all troops shall withdraw after 6 months after the war’s end (10 November 1946). This was approved by the Hamburg conference in May 1946. By November thanks to rising suspicions nobody starts doing that (Soviets would stay anyway as they did in our reality, major change is that West stays too). The Iranian Crisis became a key event showing those deep tensions in the early cold war and it was a great mistake to overlook it. Truman doctrine is also connected to Iran.
United Nations Resolutions pushed by Iran tried to deal with the situation (Autumn 1946), however without success. Another point that almost solved this crisis was Ahmad Qavam’s proposal to give Soviet Union oil rights in Northern Iran and official Iranian proclamation wishing withdrawal of all powers, this was approved by Stalin, but rejected by Pahlavi and the West (November 1946), Qavam was dismissed in January 1948 after election, replaced by Ebrahim Hakimi. With that crisis escalated to the creation of the Azerbaijan People's Government (20 February 1947) and Republic of Mahabad (18 March 1947).
Through 1947 Kurdish and Azerbaijan states in Northern Iran started to emancipate and establish popular support. Situation seemed to develop along the lines of Austria, talks stalled after the US occupation of Greenland. With hostile relations between powers in 1948, Iran continued to be a hotspot of tensions. The Pahlavi regime and separatists both obtained military aid.
In March 1949 US troops withdrew from Iran, during the Geneva Conference (September 1949 to May 1950), states agreed to finally withdraw all troops (Soviets agreed presumably to secure their interests in Germany during negotiations), so Soviets and British finally left in March-June 1950. In 1949 also an unsuccessful assassination attempt on Shah took place (4 February 1949), it was blamed on communists and Tudeh Party was banned and communists persecuted.
Beginning of the North Iran War and British-Iranian Treaty
As Soviets finally withdrew, Shah and prime minister Haj Ali Razmara started offensive operations towards the North (31 August 1950), however separatist states were better equipped, because they received Soviet aid in previous years and thus managed to repeal the first offensive. While fighting against what was presented as continuous Soviet occupation, utilizing nationalist wave as redirection of attention of Iranians from it, Razmara signed the AIOC-Iran agreement, which institutionalised British control over Iranian oil (7 March 1951). However, it still created massive resentment, riots and protests that led to violence. During spring 1951 massive opposition against Razmara, who sought to become a strongman leader, emerged, encompassing everyone from Islamists to liberals and communists. The National Front led by Mohammad Mosaddegh became the main opposition platform.
In April Majlis rejected Razmara’s decree granting him de-facto limited dictatorial powers, which he sought to obtain to “restore order”, so it was dissolved by Shah in response (20 April) and Razmara secured power with declaration of martial law, it was met with Ayatollah Kashani calling for holy war against Razmara and the British, leading to another massive wave of upheaval in April-May 1951, that was brutally repressed with many deaths. 9 June 1951 Razmara was assassinated and killed by radical Islamist member of Fadaiyan e-Islam, Hossein Ala was installed by Shah. Pahlavi used this crisis to boost his own power. National Front was banned in July. These events left great resentments in Iranian society against ruling regime. Tudeh started armed insurgency, it was however between 1952-1953 completely crushed. Mosaddegh escaped to France. In late 1952 to early 1953 an election was held to elect new Majlis, it was rigged and all elected were “independents”.
Through 1951 the front moved in favour of Iran, however separatists with Soviet support continued to hold on. After the Iranian-British Treaty, Stalin began to see Iranian re-conquest of the North as danger for the USSR and provided significant aid, leading to stalemate in 1952.
Afghanistan – Nothing significant in this period, tribal revolts in the 1940s.
Libya – Occupied by the UK and France. 1949 UN resolution about its independence, it was achieved 24 December 1951, it became a constitutional monarchy under king Idris I.
Morocco, Tunisia, Algeria – After the Paris Conference of 1952, voices calling for independence are stronger. Tunisian Habib Bourguiba and Farhat Hached entered negotiations with the Thorez government in June 1952, after which France agreed to immediate widespread autonomy Tunisian and pledging to give it full independence before 1954. The same agreement was reached with Moroccan sultan Mohammed V. More difficult situation was in Algeria. Political party calling for independence National Liberation Front was formed 23 April 1952 led by Ferhat Abbas. Negotiations about Algerian status started, in the next month. This topic was too sensitive in France, so agreement was limited to giving Algeria autonomy as part of France for now with further negotiations about independence being open. Algerians were unhappy, as neighbours got a much better deal. Algeria was still de-facto part of metropolitan France, more power was given to the Algerian Assembly, to which a free election was promised to be held in spring 1953.
Cyprus – After the fall of the mainland, the Kingdom of Greece advocated for union. In 1952 an unofficial referendum about unification with Greece, led by Orthodox Church was held, over 80% voted for union. Unlike OTL Britain was supportive of the idea of union (to strengthen the Greek state), but as it was a viable military base, they did not want to retreat.
British India
On 10-20 November 1945 British and Indian leaders met during Simla Conference; these talks stalled due to question of Muslims. Wavell Plan proposed to Churchill by viceroy Wavell, promoted Indianisation and postwar independence, however, was rejected by Churchill (December 1945). During 1946 elections to central administration were held. After Churchill’s victory, the British prime minister (May 1946) replaced Wavell with Louis Mountbatten (5 August 1946). Summer of 1946 was marked by massive protests for independence, mutinies and violence. In Autumn 1946 Cabinet Mission was sent to discuss granting more autonomy and dominion status. Eventually they planned to create one federal state, however it was strongly opposed by the Indian Muslim League. Hindu-Muslim tensions were escalating with 16 January 1947 “Direct Action Day'' massive Muslim riots and violence. In early 1947 provincial elections were held that resulted in victory of INC or IML according to ethnic and religious lines. Results of the provincial elections clearly show opposition towards British rule.
Inspired by events in Burma and Vietnam, Communist Party of India initiated nationwide anti-British “Indian People’s Liberation Uprising” (May 1947 to 1951), its estimated over 150,000 peasants joining it. Its strength shocked Britain, attempting to crush it; the British relied on local militants and Indian forces. In May 1947 Churchill officially announced that British Raj would be transformed into two dominions. Britain established the Radcliffe Commission that established the borders of two dominions (April to August); the demarcation line was published 18 August 1947. Population transfer in Punjab was organised by Britain from August, however mass migration (that started even before partition itself happened) in other provinces shocked British officials, however Britain quickly took over migration and regulated it (thus it is lesser humanitarian catastrophe, but still it is a huge humanitarian catastrophe, estimated from 100 000 deaths to half million), migration lasted from August 1947 to 1950.
1 January 1948 – two British dominions – India and Pakistan came to existence. British forces remained present here, and the British monarch remained its head of state. British officials spoke about “autonomy within the Empire'' while Indians spoke about Independence. The Kashmir deal proposed by India is also pushed by the UK and is successful (in real life Pakistan rejected it) – All of Kashmir is Pakistani, while Pakistan stops claiming Hyderabad, this nullifies the existence of Sino-Indian War.
Dominion of India – Mountbatten remained a powerful governor-general, and the first Indian prime minister became Jawaharlal Nehru. Radical Hindu nationalist assassinated Gandhi as in our reality (30 January 1948) during the first month of creation of divided dominions. 1948-1949 integration of princely states, in some cases with help of communist rebels. Communist rebellion continues as Dominion of India is considered by them just another British colonial state. Nehru successfully passed the Constitution of India (26 January 1951) and expelled British troops. In April 1951 an agreement was reached with communists to end (already weak) uprising and to participate in political life in democratic independent India. 25 June– 21 October 1952 democratic general election was held, victory of INC, compared to our reality CPN get more support. Neutral foreign policy.
Dominion of Pakistan – First Pakistani prime minister Muhammad Ali Jinnah (position of governor-general, that was much more powerful compared to Canada for example, remained in British hands, was held by Cyril Radcliffe) died 11 September 1948, he was succeeded by Liaquat Ali Khan. Pakistan became pro-British oriented, but also established relations with socialist states. Ali Khan wanted Pakistan to become a parliamentary democracy. Muslim League faced major leftist opposition, in March 1951 socialist attempted coup (Rawalpindi conspiracy), which was exposed and failed. He was assassinated 16 October 1951. The British governor general named Malik Ghulam Muhammad as new prime minister. In August 1951 first elections in Pakistan were held, communists and socialists were not allowed to participate, victory of the United Front (East Bengal). Urdu was the only official language, while all eastern part spoke Bengal. In March 1952 Bengali protesters were massacred by police and military. From February to March 1953 large (in reality anti-Ahmadis, this timeline against British rule) riots in Lahore, ended in bloody military crackdown. In the aftermath of riots Cyril Radcliffe was recalled by Attlee and replaced by Frank Messervy.
Burma – After the surrender of the Japanese in April 1946, military rule was reinstated in Burma. On 27 January 1947 British governor Reginald Dorman-Smith ordered the arrest of Aung San, this led into a massive rebellion of the AFPFL (Anti-Fascist People's Freedom League) and its armed wing People's Volunteer Organization with membership over 100,000 which started the Burmese Emergency. Moderates advocated for the governor to release Aung San and start negotiations, however this was shut down by Churchill, who preferred to use force. British forces failed to deal with the uprising and in 1947 large parts of Burma were controlled by AFPFL. During this uprising period and the arrest of Aung San, communist gained substantial influence. Churchill responded with increasing military presence, however after the eruption of another major anti-colonial rebellion in Malaya, British forces were with priority sent there. In 1950 AFPFL defeated colonial forces in several major engagements. Attlee decided to abandon Burma in favour of Malaya, Aung San was released (7 April 1951) and entered negotiations with Attlee, together with other leaders of the war of independence (June-September) and later negotiations between AFPFL and minorities (12 October, Panglong Agreement). Ceasefire and election on 9 March 1952, that resulted in the victory of AFPFL, Aung San became prime minister and officially declared independence of the Union of Burma (10 March 1952).
Aung San became the first prime minister, while Kyaw Nyein the first president. CPB left AFPFL and became the main opposition (Unlike OTL there is no communist insurgency against Burmese government or split in the communist party). Burma focused on social reforms, welfare state and industrialisation. Burma adopted a neutral foreign policy, however inclining more towards socialist bloc, closer relations with Yugoslavia and surprisingly Israel. Burma still has to deal with KMT remnants in the North and Karen insurgency.

Should I be worried that my GF (19f) is going to leave me (18m)?
This is a really long story so please bare with me.
Ok so first of all, you're all going to see that I'm not innocent in this but I just couldn't help myself as you'll see.
So for context, my gf and I have been dating for 3 months now at long-distance. I've visited her every 2 weeks since we met and I feel we really do like/love eachother.
However, there has been some road bombs since we started dating but this story only concerns one of them.
And it's important to note that my GF has had a few "crushes" and 1 or 2 short "relationships" in highschool before me. One of those includes a crush on a guy who we'll call Frank. This was at most just the 2 of them having a deep interest in eachother and they both knew. All of this being around 2 years ago.
In early April, my GF's older cousin got an invitation from one of her friends, who we'll call Oliver, to go to his Birthday Party. And he told my GF's cousin to invite all of her cousins if she wanted to. Including my GF.
And lord and behold, guess who was also going to the party? Frank.
And when Frank got word that my GF was going, my GF, who at the time told me all of this btw, said that Frank let out a joyful "yes" in response to her going.
Now, I obviously HATED hearing this, but I appreciated the fact that my GF told me when she didn't have to if she didn't want to.
So a week goes by and the party is coming up...
Everything is going well between us until...the night of the party. On the day of the party, we were both good as usual. We talked, called, she went to work just before the party and she sent me cute pics of her and all that stuff until after her shift.
After she finished work, she was immediately taking the bus to the party and that's when things went south. We called whilst she was on the bus and she suddenly became so cold to me. I can't explain it but she just became cold and her tone sounded mad at me. I kept trying to talk to her until she cut the call and texted me: "we're done".
I called her back and texted but she was still cold. I to talked her about all the things we've said and done and what they meant to her and she basically said "I don't care". I was depressed but after trying too much, I stopped texting.
2 hours later, at around 1am, I get a text from her calling my name:
"Toby?"
I answer:
"Yes?"
To which she replies "I'm sorry". It kept going a bit like that until she started telling me about why she ended it. And the first reason was because we were so far apart. And I'm like, ok sure, I understand that, but why not talk to me about it rather than making me feel so shit about myself?
That kept going for a bit and a few other things happened but aren't important. Let's skip to when she arrived back home.
As she was back home, in her bed, we continued texting. And this is when she told me the second reason as to why she ended it. Which was the fact that, a week earlier, I brought up how she's going to uni soon and that I was concerned about her meeting new people there and potentially leaving me. And I guess this kinda backfired because it apparently put doubts in her head about whether or not I'd leave her. So essentially, she ended it before I could, so she wouldn't have to endure that pain.
So we talked we talked we talked, and in the end, about 4 hours of reassuring her later, we got back together.
So the next day, we started talking about the party. And that's when she opened up about something. So apparently, Frank, had approached her during the end of the party when she wanted to go home and started talking to her about how he left his old gf and blah blah blah, obviously trying to show an opening but my gf didn't show any interest, allegedly. I didn't think much of this, even though once again, I HATED it.
Now let's skip to today.
So this is where I also become an AH in this. A week ago, when I was visiting her, she logged into her Instagram on my phone because her phone died. And when I left, she didn't log out.
So curiousity got the best of me. I snooped around in her DMS. First of all, there are absolutely zero guys in her DMS. Cool. But the main reason I was snooping was actually precisely because I wanted to see what she was gossiping to her close friends about, especially on the night of the party.
And as I scroll, I see something.
In one of her DMS with her friend, she talked about the moment Frank got word that she was going to the party.
And to cut it simple, she talked about how he was excited she was coming and all that until I see:
"I feel bad"
Her friend replies:
"About what?"
To which my gf replies:
"About thinking for a second about leaving Toby for Frank".
When I read this, my heart, dropped.
The next messages were her friend saying I'm better, my gf agreeing and all that stuff.
But then my gf says "put me back on the right path please". Like what?
She then went on to say that she knew Frank wasn't worth it regardless of what she felt and that she was just flattered in that situation. "As all girls are".
Needless to say, regardless of the fact that they said I was better, that hurt me like a mf.
And then in another DM with another friend, they talked about the moment Frank approached her at the party. And essentially, they said what I said earlier but in no way did my GF say anything like "No I'm not interested" or "I have a BF". In fact, she was talking about how bad his flirting skills were with her.
I feel so down rn after having seen all of that.
But it's worth noting that my GF expressed many times before that she doesn't support cheating in any way. She HAS good values (doesn't like exposing herself, partying often all that stuff) and she is a good person overall. And she has expressed recently as well, to her friends via DMS, about how much I make her happy and that I have no red flags or whatever. And that she loves me a lot.
So I just don't know what to think or do.

I don’t like dating apps for a couple of reasons. Firstly I feel like a lot of the people on there don’t have anything in common with me (don’t share my special interests etc). Of course you’re not going to find someone who’s one for one like you, you need to make compromises and try out their interests too. But it’s just to the point where I have no chemistry with a lot of people on there.
Secondly dating apps are businesses. I’m convinced that they actually don’t want most people to find a partner on there and instead want them to spend as much time using their service as possible. Also the price of their premium services are ridiculous - £30 for one week of bumble?!?! It’s just preying on people’s insecurities.
Thirdly I notice how it effects my own behaviour. If I’m swiping on hundreds of people I start to get very picky about people’s looks. It can get to a point where I’ll swipe left if someone has a slight imperfection, where as if it was someone I just met in real life I’d probably find them attractive. So I feel that it’s just not a healthy way to view people. Of course not getting likes for some time impacts my own self worth as well.
Most of the success I’ve had in the past was actually talking to people on Discord servers or Reddit. I think because there you can just message people instead of waiting for the algorithm to match you with someone. Also people there are more likely to be ND too, like video games and anime etc. The only problem with that is they’re usually long distance, and I just don’t want to do that again.
People have also suggested picking up a hobby and trying to meet people naturally. Unfortunately most of what I do for fun these days is play card games, and every card shop I’ve been to so far only has guys there. Maybe I’d have more luck if I went to something like a language exchange, or went back to Fencing or a different sport like basketball. Could try that once I move back to the city.

I'm 25f and my partner is 35m and we have been dating over all for 2 years and 1.5 years has been long distance.
Ever since he moved home and we became long distance, he become chronically depressed and hopeless. He hasn't done anything with his life and only plays video games. Everytime I want to talk about the future and if he will move to the next step, he says he loves me but just doesn't know if he wants to live or not. Saying he feels like he doesn't want to exist. But wants to be with me. This breaks my heart because I'm so in love with him and I've never had a more perfect profound match/love in my life. He makes small comments keeping me in the relationship like he wants to change and will eventually get out of this Rutt. But it's been over a year of this. And I can't just be waiting for him to un alive himself... He also refuses to get professional help. I even offered to make a fucking appointment for him.
As I'm writing this I know I should leave, I'm just scared to let go of this love that was once so perfect.
And on the other hand of all this, I've developed a strong friendship with another man in my life. And we've grown feelings for eachother. He's by far a great guy, but he's different from anyone I've dated. It's just not the same as how I felt with my partner. My partner checks all my boxes... That's why it's so hard to leave.
But I feel so wrong having these feelings while I'm in a relationship, but also if I were to leave my partner, I don't want to go into something so soon. I need to heal.
Anyways my question is, I'm going to be working almost 247 for 2 months, should I give my partner an ultimatum and say that we need to take a break and he needs to get his shit together while I work or I'm done. While I also see what happens with my friend? Or do I just leave, because if he couldn't get better to be with me, it's not fair to me if he waited til after I was gone?

short of the long is I am due in November and we are looking for a girl name that pairs well with the name "Alma" which is my mother's name. I am a first-generation American born here and my husband is a 3rd generation "mutt" (German, Italian, Irish) - my husband is leaving the naming up to me, he has no ties to any of his family member's names and has no girl preferences either (he also doesn't want a too common name)
he loves Alma as a middle name because it's my parent's first grandchild
Idk how to word this a way that won't offend the majority of white people on here, but I am not fond of common "white girl" names for my own daughter, such as (Rachel, Ashley, Olivia, Lauren, Diane, etc) though they are pretty names, I am also not fond of the common Spanish names (Carmen, Catalina, Marisol, Gabriella, Carolina, Mia, etc) again, pretty names, just not for me
looking for something unique but also feminine and light on the tongue that pairs well with my mom's name Alma. Bonus if the name has a cute nickname (I love nicknames)

Mage hand is straight up useless without his iri add on. You lift the pallet, by the time they've looped it they can drop it again, with the animation and the slow down after using it, you get no distance, and they get a free loop around to literally use it again. You'd rather break the god pallet over resetting it anyway even if it was good.
You can outrun his dispelling sphere. It has very niche uses because of this.
Why does fly control like billy and chucky dash when both of those can hurt someone doing it? Again it has a slowdown after so its yet another thing that nets you no distance in a chase because the survivor can reloop the tile to vault.
Flight of the damned is his redeemable feature, but give survivors a couple of days of playing against vecna on release and you'll struggle to get many hits with it as it spreads the further it travels. This is coming from a huntress main who love projectile based killers.
His perks... BHVR what are you doing? 1 is a niche meme perk (weave attunement) the other two are just straight up bad...
Compare this to the survivor that has two really fun/good perks and one that is very useable...
I understand its not even an hour into PTB as of making this post, but you dont need a long time to understand that the killers power without add ons, is average at best overly complicated at worst and doesn't really warrant getting nerfed in chase by 8+ different items you have to learn about as the killer.

Been together six years, two kids. Lots of ups and downs in the relationship but I’ve always thought things were fixable. I’ve been feeling “not loved” since July – I reached out to a long-distance ex in December telling her that things weren’t good here, that I missed feeling loved, that I was sorry for how I treated her ten years ago and my general struggles. Spouse found out on my phone, I told her I had no interest in leaving her, that I loved her. Stopped all communication with the ex. Acknowledged it was an emotional affair.
In February my spouse started a romantic affair with a previous partner (his affair from 9 years ago that was left unfinished) which turned sexual when she was flying to another city to visit a girlfriend. I found out three weeks ago while snooping her phone – while trying by best to repair things at home. I felt absolutely betrayed. She booked him a flight and expensive hotels beyond our means for them to have a four-day seaside retreat / bang fest together coming up in June. She denied it – said he didn’t have a credit card and gave her cash to book a flight, but when I told her I saw everything and reached out to him and said “Hey, we live together, we’re raising kids together and she’s not single” she began packing to move to her sisters.
For three weeks since D-Day I’ve been doing everything against Chump Lady’s advice – I’ve begged, proposed, wrote letters that I can forgive her because I wasn’t very good in December (although the scale is very different). I’ve offered to do anything to fix things – but she’s beyond checked out and still communicating with him. She fully moved out last week and I have a lawyer drafting a separation proposal. I’ve told her that I can forgive the past – but I can’t forgive her going on the trip with him in three weeks. I’ve offered money for the hotels ($600/night) – take the kids, I’ll stay home etc.
I have been going to counselling since January – I’ve gone four times in the past month. Going again tomorrow. A quote that my counsellor told me “She’s showed you that she is the kind if person who can betray her partner without remorse. Think about this - Is she really the kind of person you should WANT to stay in a relationship with”. The logic brain says – no, but my heart does. I love her, our kids, her family. I know we can fix things. I have been trying so hard in communicating since January, trying to rebuild trust, thinking about the relationship – but if they go on their affair week adventure I don’t know if I can ever forgive and move forward with her. She seems fully intent on moving forward with her adventures.