A line bob hairstyle pictures fine hair not choppy in back
[FF4M] Mafia Dog - Part 1 of 7 [Paramilitary Group] [Rescued Listener] [Severely Wounded Listener] [Concerned Caring Speakers] [Good Boy]
2024.05.14 04:07 edgiscript [FF4M] Mafia Dog - Part 1 of 7 [Paramilitary Group] [Rescued Listener] [Severely Wounded Listener] [Concerned Caring Speakers] [Good Boy]
Title: Mafia Dog
Carissa is in her early 40s. She’s a higher ranking officer in this group.
Jane is in her mid/late 20s.
Note: I believe this series will most likely never be performed. It's a 7-part series that requires either an extensive collab or a VA that can do multiple voices as the same 2 speakers are in every chapter. It varies per chapter as to who has more lines. It also gets loud at times with explosions and gunfire and the like which is not very conducive to ASMR. So, I'm releasing it here without it having been performed. I usually wait until someone performs one of my pieces before I release the script publicly. I hope you enjoy the read.
Info you might want if you do perform it: An Introduction To The Book That Is Me : ASMRScriptHaven (reddit.com)
Note: This takes place after an untold horropsychotic yandere story. If any writer wishes to write that story, be my guest. If you notify me, I'll link it here. This series deals with the recovery, recuperation, and care for the rescued victim.
My masterlist: [FF4M] Mafia Dog - Part 1 of 7 [Paramilitary Group] [Rescued Listener] [Severely Wounded Listener] [Concerned Caring Speakers] [Good Boy] : ASMRScriptHaven (reddit.com)
(All talk and sfx are muffled until the secrete door is opened.)
(Sound of muffled gunfire is going on in adjacent rooms. Door is opened roughly.)
Carissa: Clear. Damn it, she’s not in here.
(Pause.)
Yes, our informant advised that this is her office. And look, here’s the information we needed about the shipments coming in tomorrow on her desk. At least we ended up with that.
Damn it, damn it, damn it! I really thought we had her this time. Our contact said she was here right now. How could she have gotten away?
(Pause.)
Yeah, I know, Mike. Obviously Kent’s not gonna like this. He was hoping this strike would put down this upstart gang for good. We cleared out the rest of her goons at this location, but if Francine is still alive… well, I don’t want to think about that right now. Jane?
Jane: Yeah, Carissa?
Carissa: Jane, you and Mike take the others and double check every room we’ve already cleared. Look for any clue as to Francine’s whereabouts or plans that we can bring back to Kent.
Jane: You got it. Come on, Mike.
Carissa: Ronnie, you stay here with me. If our intel was right and Francine was here, maybe there’s a secret passageway she used to escape, or maybe there’s something else to discover.
(Some light tapping on walls as they look. Then a tap closer to the listener.)
Carissa: Hey, I think I’ve found something. This wall, right here. There’s something behind it. Now, how to get it open.
(Pause.)
Ronnie, great work.
(Pause.)
Yes, hit that button.
(A door slides open and all is now clear to the listener.)
That did it. There’s a secret opening here that leads to… Oh, my God! Ronnie, come here.
(Pause.)
Hey, are you all right? Can you hear me?
(Pause.)
Ronnie, put that gun down. You’re scaring him.
(Pause.)
Yes, I know Kent’s orders were to eliminate everyone we find, but this is different. He’s obviously not one of them. Look at him. He’s tied and gagged, and it looks like he’s been beaten to within an inch of his life. He’s still got dried blood on him. Whoever he is, he’s not a threat to us and he clearly needs our help.
(Pause.)
Ronnie, besides the fact that what you just said reveals you to be an inhuman prick and should be ignored on its own, you need to consider the fact that he may be some use. At the very least, he may know some things about Francine.
(Pause.)
No, calling you inhuman was not a compliment. Kent’s orders didn’t account for us finding someone like this in here, and I’m going to help him.
(Pause.)
I don’t care if it is easier to put him down. I’m taking him with us. God, what is wrong with you?
(Pause.)
Yes, it will be on my head if he turns out to be one of them.
(To the listener.) Hey, you, look at me. I’m going to remove the gag, ok. I want to talk to you.
(Pause.)
No, no, no. Don’t shake your head. Stop thrashing. We’re here to help. I’m not going to hurt you.
(Pause.)
(To Ronnie.) Ugh. Damn it. He’s scared to death and he’s going to hurt himself further if he keeps this up.
(Pause.)
Yeah, Ronnie, we’ve already established you don’t give a rat’s ass if he kills himself, but just accept that I do and that I’m in charge right now and give me the bag. I’m going to use the sedative on him.
(Pause.)
Of course, I know we brought it for Francine, but she’s not here, now is she?
(To the listener.) Ok, buddy, I’m sorry if the needle stings, but this will relax you while we move you somewhere safe. See you on the other side.
(Time passes.)
Jane: Carissa, come here. He’s waking up.
Carissa: (Whispering softly.) Hey there, big guy. How are you doing?
(Pause.)
(Not angry, but forceful like she knows what she’s doing.) No, no. Stop struggling, ok? STOP!
(Pause.)
(Calm.) Good. That’s very good. You’ve been wounded. You’re in our infirmary and you’re strapped to the bed. Any struggling could possibly cause you serious harm.
Jane: Carissa’s right. At best it will make it so our medical staff have to reconnect your IVs, and you don’t want to make them work any harder than you have to, do you?
It’s ok. We’re here to care for you. Do you understand? We want to help.
(Pause.)
Carissa: Ok, good. Good. Stay calm. Look, I’m being soft and tender, see? Jane will brush your hair with her hand while you and I talk for a bit.
I know you’ve got to be scared out of your mind right now, but if you just stay calm, we’ll do what we can to reassure you that everything’s all right. Ok?
(Pause.)
(Sigh.) Good. Good boy.
Jane: Carissa, I think he likes it when you call him that.
Carissa: (To Jane.) Yeah, I think you’re right.
(To the listener.) You like that? Ok, then. That’s what I’ll call you, ok? Good boy.
Here, now I’ll hold your hand while you lay still. My name is Carissa. That gentleman over by the door is Mike, and I already told you that this is Jane. And you are my good boy.
That’s right. I’m going to take care of you, good boy. I’m not going to let any harm come to you anymore. You’re not in any danger. These two, Mike and Jane, they’re here for you specifically to make sure nobody comes in here to hurt you.
Jane: Carissa’s right. You’re completely safe. You can rest easy while we’re here. Ok? You just rest and recover and leave everything else to us.
Carissa: And I’m going to see to it that I do everything I can to make you feel safe and protected as well. Now, to do that, we need to know a few things about you. The doctor wants you to rest. She’s telling us we can only have a few minutes with you, so we’ll make this quick. Ok?
Jane: You’re being such a good boy right now. I’ll keep running my fingers through your hair while you answer Carissa’s questions, ok?
Carissa: Now, we just need you to confirm a few things. Did Francine do this to you? Was she there in the place where we found you?
(Pause as listener doesn’t want to say anything.)
Jane: It’s ok. You can tell us.
Carissa: You’re afraid, aren’t you? She did this to you and you’re afraid if you tell us anything, she’s going to punish you.
(Pause.)
No, you don’t have to say anything. I’m not trying to frighten you. I want you to feel safe with me. You’re my good boy, remember? I wouldn’t do anything to hurt my good boy.
Here you go. I’ll just stroke your hair gently as well with my other hand. I can see you really like that when Jane does it. Does that make you feel better, good boy?
Jane: It certainly does. You’re being so good.
Carissa: Yes, you are. So, let me ask an easier question. Do you know how long Francine had you there?
(Pause.)
You don’t know? A long time? They picked you up off the street in a blizzard by offering you a warm place to stay.
Jane: My God. It’s summer now so it’s been several months at least. You poor boy.
Carissa: Well, we’ve got you now, ok?
(Softly aside to Jane.) And now we’ve just confirmed that it was Francine who was there and did this to him.
Jane: (Softly to Carissa.) Ooh, clever.
Carissa: Don’t worry, good boy, you are safe with us. You can count on that.
(Aside.) Yes, Ronnie? Kent needs me? Ok, I’ll be right there.
(To the listener.) Ok, good boy. I have to go, but Jane and Mike are going to stay just outside of your room while you get some more sleep, ok?
Jane: And I’ll stay right here beside you until you fall asleep.
Carissa: The doctor will be in periodically to check on you. Her name is Suzanne and she’s very nice, so you don’t have to worry about her. When she comes by, do what she says, ok? She’s only trying to help.
And I’ll be back as soon as I can. You’re safe as long as you’re here. I can see that you’re still very tired. They’ve given you a lot of medication so you don’t feel any pain. You be my good, good boy while I’m gone and everything will be ok.
Here. (Kiss.) Just a kiss on your forehead for my good boy. You sleep now.
Jane: And if you wake up and Carissa’s not here and you’re scared, just let me know and I’ll sit with you too. Ok?
Carissa: Good boy. Get some rest.
(Time passes. Listener wakes up and hears what Carissa’s saying to Kent, but Carissa initially doesn’t notice.)
(To Kent.) No, Kent, what I’m telling you is that he was her dog, only I think she got her kicks out of… well literally kicking him. Did you hear what Suzanne said about his injuries? That bitch Francine is twisted.
(Pause.)
No, he’s been fine since we brought him in. He’s a little scared, but that’s to be expected.
(Pause.)
What? No, you can’t do that to him. He needs protection! I’m not sending him away. I’ll care for him myself if I…
(Pause.)
Oh, I’m sorry, Kent. You weren’t saying get rid of him.
(Pause.)
Yeah, I guess I am a little zealous over this one. You know where you found me twenty years ago. I guess my heart went out to the guy as soon as I saw him. I can empathize with where he’s been.
(Pause.)
Yeah, thank you for understanding, Kent.
(Pause.)
No, you’re absolutely right with that. He’s going to need some special attention for a while.
(Pause.)
Yes, of course. I’ll take full responsibility. Mike and Jane have agreed to help too. I think they feel sorry for him like I do. I promise, I’ll… Oh, hold on, Kent.
(To listener.) Hey there, good boy. You feeling better?
(Pause.)
That’s right. I told you I’d be back as soon as I could.
(To Kent.)
No, Kent, I understand. Go ahead. I’ll stay here with my good boy.
(Pause.)
Yeah, I’ll keep you updated. And thanks, Kent.
(To listener.) Did you sleep well, good boy?
(Pause.)
That’s good to hear. I’m glad you’re feeling better.
(Pause.)
Yes, the straps are still on. This is a new situation and we wanted to make sure you weren’t going to hurt anybody because you got scared, including yourself.
(Pause.)
No. I don’t think you’re violent, but it’s a precaution we take with everybody. Understand? They’ve even had to do it to me a couple times when I’ve been down here injured. I tend to move around a lot when I sleep and I can hurt myself by pulling out everything the doctors have attached.
(Pause.)
(Taken aback.) Wha…? Mistress? No, no. I’m not your mistress.
(Pause.)
Oh, don’t cry. I’m not mad at you for saying that. You’re still my good boy. Here, let me hug you. Does that feel better?
(Pause.)
There, there. You’re ok. I wasn’t mad at you, and I wasn’t rejecting you.
(Pause.)
No, you don’t have to call me… You know what? It’s ok. You can call me mistress for now if it makes you feel better.
(Pause.)
I can tell that it does. You’re more at ease. Ok, I’m your mistress.
(To herself.) I guess that’s something we’re going to have to work on.
(Pause.)
What? Oh, nothing, my good boy. Nothing you have to worry about right now.
Now that you’re awake, Suzanne has some tests she wants to run. Mostly she’s just going to talk to you, show you some lights, that kind of thing. I don’t think any needles are involved this time.
(Pause.)
I know. I hate needles too. So just relax and do what she says. And when she’s done, Mike will come in to keep you company for a while. I have some business to take care of.
(Pause.)
What should you do while I’m gone? Well, you need to make sure that when I come back, everybody tells me what a good boy you’ve been. Ok?
(Pause.)
Yes, Jane will be here in a while too. She’s out right now on an assignment, but she’ll be back.
(Pause.)
Oh, that makes you smile, does it? Well, good. I’m glad she makes you feel better. Ok, so long for now, my good boy. Know that you’re safe.
Part 2 coming.
submitted by edgiscript to ASMRScriptHaven [link] [comments]
Carissa is in her early 40s. She’s a higher ranking officer in this group.
Jane is in her mid/late 20s.
Note: I believe this series will most likely never be performed. It's a 7-part series that requires either an extensive collab or a VA that can do multiple voices as the same 2 speakers are in every chapter. It varies per chapter as to who has more lines. It also gets loud at times with explosions and gunfire and the like which is not very conducive to ASMR. So, I'm releasing it here without it having been performed. I usually wait until someone performs one of my pieces before I release the script publicly. I hope you enjoy the read.
Info you might want if you do perform it: An Introduction To The Book That Is Me : ASMRScriptHaven (reddit.com)
Note: This takes place after an untold horropsychotic yandere story. If any writer wishes to write that story, be my guest. If you notify me, I'll link it here. This series deals with the recovery, recuperation, and care for the rescued victim.
My masterlist: [FF4M] Mafia Dog - Part 1 of 7 [Paramilitary Group] [Rescued Listener] [Severely Wounded Listener] [Concerned Caring Speakers] [Good Boy] : ASMRScriptHaven (reddit.com)
(All talk and sfx are muffled until the secrete door is opened.)
(Sound of muffled gunfire is going on in adjacent rooms. Door is opened roughly.)
Carissa: Clear. Damn it, she’s not in here.
(Pause.)
Yes, our informant advised that this is her office. And look, here’s the information we needed about the shipments coming in tomorrow on her desk. At least we ended up with that.
Damn it, damn it, damn it! I really thought we had her this time. Our contact said she was here right now. How could she have gotten away?
(Pause.)
Yeah, I know, Mike. Obviously Kent’s not gonna like this. He was hoping this strike would put down this upstart gang for good. We cleared out the rest of her goons at this location, but if Francine is still alive… well, I don’t want to think about that right now. Jane?
Jane: Yeah, Carissa?
Carissa: Jane, you and Mike take the others and double check every room we’ve already cleared. Look for any clue as to Francine’s whereabouts or plans that we can bring back to Kent.
Jane: You got it. Come on, Mike.
Carissa: Ronnie, you stay here with me. If our intel was right and Francine was here, maybe there’s a secret passageway she used to escape, or maybe there’s something else to discover.
(Some light tapping on walls as they look. Then a tap closer to the listener.)
Carissa: Hey, I think I’ve found something. This wall, right here. There’s something behind it. Now, how to get it open.
(Pause.)
Ronnie, great work.
(Pause.)
Yes, hit that button.
(A door slides open and all is now clear to the listener.)
That did it. There’s a secret opening here that leads to… Oh, my God! Ronnie, come here.
(Pause.)
Hey, are you all right? Can you hear me?
(Pause.)
Ronnie, put that gun down. You’re scaring him.
(Pause.)
Yes, I know Kent’s orders were to eliminate everyone we find, but this is different. He’s obviously not one of them. Look at him. He’s tied and gagged, and it looks like he’s been beaten to within an inch of his life. He’s still got dried blood on him. Whoever he is, he’s not a threat to us and he clearly needs our help.
(Pause.)
Ronnie, besides the fact that what you just said reveals you to be an inhuman prick and should be ignored on its own, you need to consider the fact that he may be some use. At the very least, he may know some things about Francine.
(Pause.)
No, calling you inhuman was not a compliment. Kent’s orders didn’t account for us finding someone like this in here, and I’m going to help him.
(Pause.)
I don’t care if it is easier to put him down. I’m taking him with us. God, what is wrong with you?
(Pause.)
Yes, it will be on my head if he turns out to be one of them.
(To the listener.) Hey, you, look at me. I’m going to remove the gag, ok. I want to talk to you.
(Pause.)
No, no, no. Don’t shake your head. Stop thrashing. We’re here to help. I’m not going to hurt you.
(Pause.)
(To Ronnie.) Ugh. Damn it. He’s scared to death and he’s going to hurt himself further if he keeps this up.
(Pause.)
Yeah, Ronnie, we’ve already established you don’t give a rat’s ass if he kills himself, but just accept that I do and that I’m in charge right now and give me the bag. I’m going to use the sedative on him.
(Pause.)
Of course, I know we brought it for Francine, but she’s not here, now is she?
(To the listener.) Ok, buddy, I’m sorry if the needle stings, but this will relax you while we move you somewhere safe. See you on the other side.
(Time passes.)
Jane: Carissa, come here. He’s waking up.
Carissa: (Whispering softly.) Hey there, big guy. How are you doing?
(Pause.)
(Not angry, but forceful like she knows what she’s doing.) No, no. Stop struggling, ok? STOP!
(Pause.)
(Calm.) Good. That’s very good. You’ve been wounded. You’re in our infirmary and you’re strapped to the bed. Any struggling could possibly cause you serious harm.
Jane: Carissa’s right. At best it will make it so our medical staff have to reconnect your IVs, and you don’t want to make them work any harder than you have to, do you?
It’s ok. We’re here to care for you. Do you understand? We want to help.
(Pause.)
Carissa: Ok, good. Good. Stay calm. Look, I’m being soft and tender, see? Jane will brush your hair with her hand while you and I talk for a bit.
I know you’ve got to be scared out of your mind right now, but if you just stay calm, we’ll do what we can to reassure you that everything’s all right. Ok?
(Pause.)
(Sigh.) Good. Good boy.
Jane: Carissa, I think he likes it when you call him that.
Carissa: (To Jane.) Yeah, I think you’re right.
(To the listener.) You like that? Ok, then. That’s what I’ll call you, ok? Good boy.
Here, now I’ll hold your hand while you lay still. My name is Carissa. That gentleman over by the door is Mike, and I already told you that this is Jane. And you are my good boy.
That’s right. I’m going to take care of you, good boy. I’m not going to let any harm come to you anymore. You’re not in any danger. These two, Mike and Jane, they’re here for you specifically to make sure nobody comes in here to hurt you.
Jane: Carissa’s right. You’re completely safe. You can rest easy while we’re here. Ok? You just rest and recover and leave everything else to us.
Carissa: And I’m going to see to it that I do everything I can to make you feel safe and protected as well. Now, to do that, we need to know a few things about you. The doctor wants you to rest. She’s telling us we can only have a few minutes with you, so we’ll make this quick. Ok?
Jane: You’re being such a good boy right now. I’ll keep running my fingers through your hair while you answer Carissa’s questions, ok?
Carissa: Now, we just need you to confirm a few things. Did Francine do this to you? Was she there in the place where we found you?
(Pause as listener doesn’t want to say anything.)
Jane: It’s ok. You can tell us.
Carissa: You’re afraid, aren’t you? She did this to you and you’re afraid if you tell us anything, she’s going to punish you.
(Pause.)
No, you don’t have to say anything. I’m not trying to frighten you. I want you to feel safe with me. You’re my good boy, remember? I wouldn’t do anything to hurt my good boy.
Here you go. I’ll just stroke your hair gently as well with my other hand. I can see you really like that when Jane does it. Does that make you feel better, good boy?
Jane: It certainly does. You’re being so good.
Carissa: Yes, you are. So, let me ask an easier question. Do you know how long Francine had you there?
(Pause.)
You don’t know? A long time? They picked you up off the street in a blizzard by offering you a warm place to stay.
Jane: My God. It’s summer now so it’s been several months at least. You poor boy.
Carissa: Well, we’ve got you now, ok?
(Softly aside to Jane.) And now we’ve just confirmed that it was Francine who was there and did this to him.
Jane: (Softly to Carissa.) Ooh, clever.
Carissa: Don’t worry, good boy, you are safe with us. You can count on that.
(Aside.) Yes, Ronnie? Kent needs me? Ok, I’ll be right there.
(To the listener.) Ok, good boy. I have to go, but Jane and Mike are going to stay just outside of your room while you get some more sleep, ok?
Jane: And I’ll stay right here beside you until you fall asleep.
Carissa: The doctor will be in periodically to check on you. Her name is Suzanne and she’s very nice, so you don’t have to worry about her. When she comes by, do what she says, ok? She’s only trying to help.
And I’ll be back as soon as I can. You’re safe as long as you’re here. I can see that you’re still very tired. They’ve given you a lot of medication so you don’t feel any pain. You be my good, good boy while I’m gone and everything will be ok.
Here. (Kiss.) Just a kiss on your forehead for my good boy. You sleep now.
Jane: And if you wake up and Carissa’s not here and you’re scared, just let me know and I’ll sit with you too. Ok?
Carissa: Good boy. Get some rest.
(Time passes. Listener wakes up and hears what Carissa’s saying to Kent, but Carissa initially doesn’t notice.)
(To Kent.) No, Kent, what I’m telling you is that he was her dog, only I think she got her kicks out of… well literally kicking him. Did you hear what Suzanne said about his injuries? That bitch Francine is twisted.
(Pause.)
No, he’s been fine since we brought him in. He’s a little scared, but that’s to be expected.
(Pause.)
What? No, you can’t do that to him. He needs protection! I’m not sending him away. I’ll care for him myself if I…
(Pause.)
Oh, I’m sorry, Kent. You weren’t saying get rid of him.
(Pause.)
Yeah, I guess I am a little zealous over this one. You know where you found me twenty years ago. I guess my heart went out to the guy as soon as I saw him. I can empathize with where he’s been.
(Pause.)
Yeah, thank you for understanding, Kent.
(Pause.)
No, you’re absolutely right with that. He’s going to need some special attention for a while.
(Pause.)
Yes, of course. I’ll take full responsibility. Mike and Jane have agreed to help too. I think they feel sorry for him like I do. I promise, I’ll… Oh, hold on, Kent.
(To listener.) Hey there, good boy. You feeling better?
(Pause.)
That’s right. I told you I’d be back as soon as I could.
(To Kent.)
No, Kent, I understand. Go ahead. I’ll stay here with my good boy.
(Pause.)
Yeah, I’ll keep you updated. And thanks, Kent.
(To listener.) Did you sleep well, good boy?
(Pause.)
That’s good to hear. I’m glad you’re feeling better.
(Pause.)
Yes, the straps are still on. This is a new situation and we wanted to make sure you weren’t going to hurt anybody because you got scared, including yourself.
(Pause.)
No. I don’t think you’re violent, but it’s a precaution we take with everybody. Understand? They’ve even had to do it to me a couple times when I’ve been down here injured. I tend to move around a lot when I sleep and I can hurt myself by pulling out everything the doctors have attached.
(Pause.)
(Taken aback.) Wha…? Mistress? No, no. I’m not your mistress.
(Pause.)
Oh, don’t cry. I’m not mad at you for saying that. You’re still my good boy. Here, let me hug you. Does that feel better?
(Pause.)
There, there. You’re ok. I wasn’t mad at you, and I wasn’t rejecting you.
(Pause.)
No, you don’t have to call me… You know what? It’s ok. You can call me mistress for now if it makes you feel better.
(Pause.)
I can tell that it does. You’re more at ease. Ok, I’m your mistress.
(To herself.) I guess that’s something we’re going to have to work on.
(Pause.)
What? Oh, nothing, my good boy. Nothing you have to worry about right now.
Now that you’re awake, Suzanne has some tests she wants to run. Mostly she’s just going to talk to you, show you some lights, that kind of thing. I don’t think any needles are involved this time.
(Pause.)
I know. I hate needles too. So just relax and do what she says. And when she’s done, Mike will come in to keep you company for a while. I have some business to take care of.
(Pause.)
What should you do while I’m gone? Well, you need to make sure that when I come back, everybody tells me what a good boy you’ve been. Ok?
(Pause.)
Yes, Jane will be here in a while too. She’s out right now on an assignment, but she’ll be back.
(Pause.)
Oh, that makes you smile, does it? Well, good. I’m glad she makes you feel better. Ok, so long for now, my good boy. Know that you’re safe.
Part 2 coming.
2024.05.14 04:03 Topmate Mystery Cat Illness - 2 Emergency Vet Trips and 6k later, No Answers
- Species: Cat
- Age: 10
- Sex/Neuter status: Male Neutered
- Breed: Domestic Shorthair
- Body weight: 10 lbs
- History: Diagnosed with Small Cell Lymphoma of GI two years ago. On Prednisolone and Chlorambucil. Multiple ultrasounds (including recent) and blood test shows no reoccurance of cancer in body. Recently brought to vet for unrelated symptoms. Lethargy, unable to really meow, excessive drooling, eye dischange, possible mouth pain, squinting
- Clinical signs: Extreme Lethargy, usually chatty cat doesnt really meow anymore, squinting eyes and a ton of discharge, nose running and recently been droollng alot. keeps making mouth smacking noises. been on and off going on a few weeks now. Seems to have hit a high point of fatigue today after his ER visit yesterday. One thing that caused me to bring him to ER was I was giving him his usual medicine and he kind of cried when I tried to open his mouth.
- Duration: 3 weeks
- Your general location: Northeast USA
- Links to any test results, X-rays, vet reports etc. that you have: Results attached. Blood tests came back OK. Platelet count confirmed OK. Ultrasound came back fine. Cat had fever of 104 going into vet and leaving it 6 hours later. Given sub fluids.
4/29/24 AFAST: negative peritoneal effusion, no obvious abnormalities TFAST: La:Ao ~1:1, intermittent B-lines, negative pericardial/pleural effusion CBC: HCT 33%, WBC 11.96K, Neut 10K, Lymph 1.15K, Plt 220K Chem17/lytes: Glu 205, BUN 9, Creat 1.3, Phos 3.1, Ca 9.4, Na 156, K 3.5, Cl 118, TP 8.1, Alb 3.5, Glob 4.6, ALT 13, ALP 41, GGT 0, Tbili 0.1 PCV/TS: 32%/7.6, serum clear CXAXR: 1. The appearance of the stomach, small intestine and colon can be compatible with a nonspecific generalized functional ileus (e.g. gastroenterocolitis or infiltrative bowel disease such as IBD or the clinically reported gastrointestinal lymphoma). There is no evidence of small intestinal foreign material or mechanical obstruction. Consider initiation of therapy for generalized functional ileus and if clinically indicated, abdominal ultrasound might be pursued for further investigation. 2. Mild constipation. 3. Normal thorax. 4. Incidental small defect in the cranial endplate of L5 of uncertain etiology, likely a schmorl's node.
5/12/24 PCV/TS: 30/7.8 CBC: RBC 6.02 (L), HCT 29 (L), PLT 31 (L), bands suspected, rest unremarkable Blood smear: Majority of neutrophils appear toxic. Platelet clumping noted, suspect that platelet number is adequate. Chem17/lytes: Glu 177, rest unremarkable BP (doppler): 100mmHg FUO standard panel submitted to idexx Respiratory PCR panel submitted to idexx AUS with Radiologist: Conclusions/recommendations: 1) Mild gastritis. This is suspected to represent a secondary rather than primary condition however a flare up of small cell LSA cannot be completely excluded. Cursory evaluation of the cervical soft tissues did not reveal any abnormalities as well. Recommendations: Pending results of other testing, consider a GI panel if not recently performed, empirical treatment for gastritis and complete the work up for FUO
Treatments/Plan:
LRS 100ml SQ Ondansetron 0.5mg/kg SQ Convenia 8mg/kg SQ Rx mirtazapine TGH Rx famciclovir x 14d to pick up at pharmacy Rec to follow-up with pDVM in 1-2 days if CS not improving/worsening
2024.05.14 04:02 Reisende8 Relationship help - should I stay?
Dear Reddit community,
I need some relationship life advice.
I (23 female) am currently involved with a 27 (male) partner. I love him and he loves me, but I often wonder if our relationship is worth continuing. Half the time we are each others' best friend and lovers and we get along amazingly... however the other half of the time we argue over the stupidest things and the arguments go round and round in circles for a while (and I'm not joking, we argue SO fucking much). To give an example, just this past weekend I drove up to see him as well as celebrate his friends' family visiting from South America (we are long distance) and on the car ride there, I ask if we are staying in his motorhome he has there. He wouldn't give me a straight answer and I was wanting to know so that 1) we could save money instead of going to a hotel 2) we wouldn't have to worry about checkout times 3) I wanted to know where the hell I was driving to! Instead of giving me a straight answer about why he preferred to stay at a hotel, he went round in circles and got upset that I was asking. We eventually figured that argument out and it turns out he didn't want to stay in the motorhome because he still needed to clean it and he didn't want to welcome me in that kind of environment (the next day we went to his motorhome so I could help him organise).
That same night when we're celebrating his friend and her family, he starts smoking his friend's vape and is attached to it pretty much the whole night. Obviously it is his choice what he does with his body, but it sucks when your partner tells you he quite vaping/smoking and then as soon as he has the opportunity he picks it right back up again and blames his friends for his vaping problem. The group was playing some fun Brazilian music to dance to, and so I go up to my partner to ask him to dance with me and I playfully try to push the vape away from his hand (he was just sitting there vaping). I didn't slap his hand, I didn't forcefully take it away from him, I wasn't disrespectful in anyway - I was just trying to be playful and was hoping he would put it down and dance with me. I allowed my expectations to upset me. I was expecting/hoping that he would put it down and dance with me. Instead, he was like "not now babe" and reaches for another hit of nicotine. I got upset by this because we haven't seen each other in over a month, we only have a few hours together, and first he gets weird/upset about the motorhome thing and then it feels like he chooses spending time with the vape over dancing with the person he calls the love of his life. (and maybe I am overreacting with this particular situation, it just hurts watching him hurt his health like that then blame his friends and it feels like my partner has no self control when it comes to that kind of stuff).
That was Friday. On Sunday morning, his alarm went off at 6 am which of course also woke me up. He started getting up/moving around/making a bunch of noise, and I try asking him what's going on. No response. I ask again and I ask "Do we really need to be awake at 6?" because in my mind his flight back to his state isn't until the afternoon and I was the one taking him to the airport so do I need to start getting ready too?? like why are you up so early? can you please explain what is happening? Like the motorhome situation - in which he would not clearly explain what was going on - he just got mad at me saying I was tripping about the alarm and that I shouldn't ask him questions in that kind of tone of voice (what tone of voice?!?!?). He just started getting so upset that I asked if we needed to be up at that time and I was so confused by his response because it really didn't seem fair to me. When he got back in bed I did not want to be touched by him - I was so sad that I feel like I can't even ask my partner simple questions without him getting upset. He tried to go on explaining why I shouldn't ask questions like that and justifying his response. I get first thing in the morning after not much sleep people can be a little cranky, but dude to tell me I'm tripping and then evading my one question/getting defensive? not cool to me. After it's clear I'm not buying his response, he apologises and asks me to forgive his reaction, which I do and we're back to being fine. That day before dropping him at the airport, we drop off some his clothes we organised at the donation centre and then he realises he can't find his car or motorhome keys. so we spend the whole time before the airport with me driving him around to various locations to find his keys, we search my whole car, he has me search my entire bag... we can't find the fucking keys anywhere. But we were both like, no worries, they will show up somewhere. And we had a good time about it. No arguments, no complaints, he was grateful that I was helping him with his shit.
The next morning I find them in my car and I send him a picture with "omg babe, guess what I just found!" and instead of being relieved/happy that I found them, he BLAMES ME for not having seen the keys before. to be clear, I never once touched his motorhome keys. I had no idea until Sunday morning that we would even be looking for them. He blames ME for HIM losing HIS keys. I wouldn't take that shit from him. Then he went on saying that I need to "centre myself," that he has a right to feel the way he does blah blah, and sure he has a right to feel whatever he desires, but he has no right to blame me for anything! especially after I spent a good amount of time and fuel helping him do things he should've figured out on his own a long time ago and it is so easy to ship him the keys. not a big problem at all. and when I sent the key picture, he had a New York bottle opener on the keychain, and I was like "oh cool! Have you been to New York??" with the intention of getting to know my partner better - I think it's could he potentially took a trip there and I was asking in a light hearted way and his response (over voice message) was a sarcastic "yeah babe, I go there every weekend." Again, I don't understand this response. I don't understand why my question was so bad and why he felt like avoiding it? Maybe he was stressed about the whole key situation/ feeling jet lagged from the flight. But still. it sucked. I basically told him that I wouldn't take this shit from him that he cannot blame me and not take ownership of his own shit.
I just don't understand. I also have such a hard time leaving him. I tried before in the past - I felt pressured to move to Florida with him; he talked a lot about moving into together, having kids, etc etc and it was just moving too fast for me and I felt like I needed to leave because I can't give those things to him right now and it's not fair if that is something he wants and for me to stay in the relationship wanting different things at the moment. He convinces me to stay with him, saying he can wait for those things, but doesn't want to lose me. I stayed.
I'm just sooooo tired of these arguments! I'm tired of feeling like I can't ask basic questions without him getting upset. I'm tired of being made out to be the bad guy when I'm clearly not at fault. I'm tired of feeling like I acquiesce to him. I sometimes feel like he needs me more than I need him and I don't want to be his mother cleaning up after him/keeping track of his shit and then getting blamed when I don't know where HIS things are.
And we have silly arguments like this so much in the past too. I feel like maybe I'm deluding myself thinking that when we are together for longing periods of time that we won't argue so much - that it's the stress of travel that causes us to bicker. or that I'm holding on to the really good parts of the relationship where we make each other laugh so hard and we can meaningful conversations. I worry that if we do someday have kids that they won't be able to come to him without him getting upset/weird/non-communicative. *sigh* what do I do? I know I just talked about the arguments of this past weekend so this post feels a little biased. But I feel stuck. Part of feels like maybe I should leave him, but the other part of me sticks it out. Am I secretly addicted to the drama? Or maybe I don't have a strong enough will
submitted by Reisende8 to dating_advice [link] [comments]
I need some relationship life advice.
I (23 female) am currently involved with a 27 (male) partner. I love him and he loves me, but I often wonder if our relationship is worth continuing. Half the time we are each others' best friend and lovers and we get along amazingly... however the other half of the time we argue over the stupidest things and the arguments go round and round in circles for a while (and I'm not joking, we argue SO fucking much). To give an example, just this past weekend I drove up to see him as well as celebrate his friends' family visiting from South America (we are long distance) and on the car ride there, I ask if we are staying in his motorhome he has there. He wouldn't give me a straight answer and I was wanting to know so that 1) we could save money instead of going to a hotel 2) we wouldn't have to worry about checkout times 3) I wanted to know where the hell I was driving to! Instead of giving me a straight answer about why he preferred to stay at a hotel, he went round in circles and got upset that I was asking. We eventually figured that argument out and it turns out he didn't want to stay in the motorhome because he still needed to clean it and he didn't want to welcome me in that kind of environment (the next day we went to his motorhome so I could help him organise).
That same night when we're celebrating his friend and her family, he starts smoking his friend's vape and is attached to it pretty much the whole night. Obviously it is his choice what he does with his body, but it sucks when your partner tells you he quite vaping/smoking and then as soon as he has the opportunity he picks it right back up again and blames his friends for his vaping problem. The group was playing some fun Brazilian music to dance to, and so I go up to my partner to ask him to dance with me and I playfully try to push the vape away from his hand (he was just sitting there vaping). I didn't slap his hand, I didn't forcefully take it away from him, I wasn't disrespectful in anyway - I was just trying to be playful and was hoping he would put it down and dance with me. I allowed my expectations to upset me. I was expecting/hoping that he would put it down and dance with me. Instead, he was like "not now babe" and reaches for another hit of nicotine. I got upset by this because we haven't seen each other in over a month, we only have a few hours together, and first he gets weird/upset about the motorhome thing and then it feels like he chooses spending time with the vape over dancing with the person he calls the love of his life. (and maybe I am overreacting with this particular situation, it just hurts watching him hurt his health like that then blame his friends and it feels like my partner has no self control when it comes to that kind of stuff).
That was Friday. On Sunday morning, his alarm went off at 6 am which of course also woke me up. He started getting up/moving around/making a bunch of noise, and I try asking him what's going on. No response. I ask again and I ask "Do we really need to be awake at 6?" because in my mind his flight back to his state isn't until the afternoon and I was the one taking him to the airport so do I need to start getting ready too?? like why are you up so early? can you please explain what is happening? Like the motorhome situation - in which he would not clearly explain what was going on - he just got mad at me saying I was tripping about the alarm and that I shouldn't ask him questions in that kind of tone of voice (what tone of voice?!?!?). He just started getting so upset that I asked if we needed to be up at that time and I was so confused by his response because it really didn't seem fair to me. When he got back in bed I did not want to be touched by him - I was so sad that I feel like I can't even ask my partner simple questions without him getting upset. He tried to go on explaining why I shouldn't ask questions like that and justifying his response. I get first thing in the morning after not much sleep people can be a little cranky, but dude to tell me I'm tripping and then evading my one question/getting defensive? not cool to me. After it's clear I'm not buying his response, he apologises and asks me to forgive his reaction, which I do and we're back to being fine. That day before dropping him at the airport, we drop off some his clothes we organised at the donation centre and then he realises he can't find his car or motorhome keys. so we spend the whole time before the airport with me driving him around to various locations to find his keys, we search my whole car, he has me search my entire bag... we can't find the fucking keys anywhere. But we were both like, no worries, they will show up somewhere. And we had a good time about it. No arguments, no complaints, he was grateful that I was helping him with his shit.
The next morning I find them in my car and I send him a picture with "omg babe, guess what I just found!" and instead of being relieved/happy that I found them, he BLAMES ME for not having seen the keys before. to be clear, I never once touched his motorhome keys. I had no idea until Sunday morning that we would even be looking for them. He blames ME for HIM losing HIS keys. I wouldn't take that shit from him. Then he went on saying that I need to "centre myself," that he has a right to feel the way he does blah blah, and sure he has a right to feel whatever he desires, but he has no right to blame me for anything! especially after I spent a good amount of time and fuel helping him do things he should've figured out on his own a long time ago and it is so easy to ship him the keys. not a big problem at all. and when I sent the key picture, he had a New York bottle opener on the keychain, and I was like "oh cool! Have you been to New York??" with the intention of getting to know my partner better - I think it's could he potentially took a trip there and I was asking in a light hearted way and his response (over voice message) was a sarcastic "yeah babe, I go there every weekend." Again, I don't understand this response. I don't understand why my question was so bad and why he felt like avoiding it? Maybe he was stressed about the whole key situation/ feeling jet lagged from the flight. But still. it sucked. I basically told him that I wouldn't take this shit from him that he cannot blame me and not take ownership of his own shit.
I just don't understand. I also have such a hard time leaving him. I tried before in the past - I felt pressured to move to Florida with him; he talked a lot about moving into together, having kids, etc etc and it was just moving too fast for me and I felt like I needed to leave because I can't give those things to him right now and it's not fair if that is something he wants and for me to stay in the relationship wanting different things at the moment. He convinces me to stay with him, saying he can wait for those things, but doesn't want to lose me. I stayed.
I'm just sooooo tired of these arguments! I'm tired of feeling like I can't ask basic questions without him getting upset. I'm tired of being made out to be the bad guy when I'm clearly not at fault. I'm tired of feeling like I acquiesce to him. I sometimes feel like he needs me more than I need him and I don't want to be his mother cleaning up after him/keeping track of his shit and then getting blamed when I don't know where HIS things are.
And we have silly arguments like this so much in the past too. I feel like maybe I'm deluding myself thinking that when we are together for longing periods of time that we won't argue so much - that it's the stress of travel that causes us to bicker. or that I'm holding on to the really good parts of the relationship where we make each other laugh so hard and we can meaningful conversations. I worry that if we do someday have kids that they won't be able to come to him without him getting upset/weird/non-communicative. *sigh* what do I do? I know I just talked about the arguments of this past weekend so this post feels a little biased. But I feel stuck. Part of feels like maybe I should leave him, but the other part of me sticks it out. Am I secretly addicted to the drama? Or maybe I don't have a strong enough will
2024.05.14 04:01 Reisende8 Relationship Help - should I stay or go? 23/F with 27/M for one year relationship
Dear Reddit community,
I need some relationship life advice.
I '23/F' am currently involved with a '27/M' partner for a year now. I love him and he loves me, but I often wonder if our relationship is worth continuing. Half the time we are each others' best friend and lovers and we get along amazingly... however the other half of the time we argue over the stupidest things and the arguments go round and round in circles for a while (and I'm not joking, we argue SO fucking much). To give an example, just this past weekend I drove up to see him as well as celebrate his friends' family visiting from South America (we are long distance) and on the car ride there, I ask if we are staying in his motorhome he has there. He wouldn't give me a straight answer and I was wanting to know so that 1) we could save money instead of going to a hotel 2) we wouldn't have to worry about checkout times 3) I wanted to know where the hell I was driving to! Instead of giving me a straight answer about why he preferred to stay at a hotel, he went round in circles and got upset that I was asking. We eventually figured that argument out and it turns out he didn't want to stay in the motorhome because he still needed to clean it and he didn't want to welcome me in that kind of environment (the next day we went to his motorhome so I could help him organise).
That same night when we're celebrating his friend and her family, he starts smoking his friend's vape and is attached to it pretty much the whole night. Obviously it is his choice what he does with his body, but it sucks when your partner tells you he quite vaping/smoking and then as soon as he has the opportunity he picks it right back up again and blames his friends for his vaping problem. The group was playing some fun Brazilian music to dance to, and so I go up to my partner to ask him to dance with me and I playfully try to push the vape away from his hand (he was just sitting there vaping). I didn't slap his hand, I didn't forcefully take it away from him, I wasn't disrespectful in anyway - I was just trying to be playful and was hoping he would put it down and dance with me. I allowed my expectations to upset me. I was expecting/hoping that he would put it down and dance with me. Instead, he was like "not now babe" and reaches for another hit of nicotine. I got upset by this because we haven't seen each other in over a month, we only have a few hours together, and first he gets weird/upset about the motorhome thing and then it feels like he chooses spending time with the vape over dancing with the person he calls the love of his life. (and maybe I am overreacting with this particular situation, it just hurts watching him hurt his health like that then blame his friends and it feels like my partner has no self control when it comes to that kind of stuff).
That was Friday. On Sunday morning, his alarm went off at 6 am which of course also woke me up. He started getting up/moving around/making a bunch of noise, and I try asking him what's going on. No response. I ask again and I ask "Do we really need to be awake at 6?" because in my mind his flight back to his state isn't until the afternoon and I was the one taking him to the airport so do I need to start getting ready too?? like why are you up so early? can you please explain what is happening? Like the motorhome situation - in which he would not clearly explain what was going on - he just got mad at me saying I was tripping about the alarm and that I shouldn't ask him questions in that kind of tone of voice (what tone of voice?!?!?). He just started getting so upset that I asked if we needed to be up at that time and I was so confused by his response because it really didn't seem fair to me. When he got back in bed I did not want to be touched by him - I was so sad that I feel like I can't even ask my partner simple questions without him getting upset. He tried to go on explaining why I shouldn't ask questions like that and justifying his response. I get first thing in the morning after not much sleep people can be a little cranky, but dude to tell me I'm tripping and then evading my one question/getting defensive? not cool to me. After it's clear I'm not buying his response, he apologises and asks me to forgive his reaction, which I do and we're back to being fine. That day before dropping him at the airport, we drop off some his clothes we organised at the donation centre and then he realises he can't find his car or motorhome keys. so we spend the whole time before the airport with me driving him around to various locations to find his keys, we search my whole car, he has me search my entire bag... we can't find the fucking keys anywhere. But we were both like, no worries, they will show up somewhere. And we had a good time about it. No arguments, no complaints, he was grateful that I was helping him with his shit.
The next morning I find them in my car and I send him a picture with "omg babe, guess what I just found!" and instead of being relieved/happy that I found them, he BLAMES ME for not having seen the keys before. to be clear, I never once touched his motorhome keys. I had no idea until Sunday morning that we would even be looking for them. He blames ME for HIM losing HIS keys. I wouldn't take that shit from him. Then he went on saying that I need to "centre myself," that he has a right to feel the way he does blah blah, and sure he has a right to feel whatever he desires, but he has no right to blame me for anything! especially after I spent a good amount of time and fuel helping him do things he should've figured out on his own a long time ago and it is so easy to ship him the keys. not a big problem at all. and when I sent the key picture, he had a New York bottle opener on the keychain, and I was like "oh cool! Have you been to New York??" with the intention of getting to know my partner better - I think it's could he potentially took a trip there and I was asking in a light hearted way and his response (over voice message) was a sarcastic "yeah babe, I go there every weekend." Again, I don't understand this response. I don't understand why my question was so bad and why he felt like avoiding it? Maybe he was stressed about the whole key situation/ feeling jet lagged from the flight. But still. it sucked. I basically told him that I wouldn't take this shit from him that he cannot blame me and not take ownership of his own shit.
I just don't understand. I also have such a hard time leaving him. I tried before in the past - I felt pressured to move to Florida with him; he talked a lot about moving into together, having kids, etc etc and it was just moving too fast for me and I felt like I needed to leave because I can't give those things to him right now and it's not fair if that is something he wants and for me to stay in the relationship wanting different things at the moment. He convinces me to stay with him, saying he can wait for those things, but doesn't want to lose me. I stayed.
I'm just sooooo tired of these arguments! I'm tired of feeling like I can't ask basic questions without him getting upset. I'm tired of being made out to be the bad guy when I'm clearly not at fault. I'm tired of feeling like I acquiesce to him. I sometimes feel like he needs me more than I need him and I don't want to be his mother cleaning up after him/keeping track of his shit and then getting blamed when I don't know where HIS things are.
And we have silly arguments like this so much in the past too. I feel like maybe I'm deluding myself thinking that when we are together for longing periods of time that we won't argue so much - that it's the stress of travel that causes us to bicker. or that I'm holding on to the really good parts of the relationship where we make each other laugh so hard and we can meaningful conversations.
I worry that if we do someday have kids that they won't be able to come to him without him getting upset/weird/non-communicative. *sigh* what do I do? I know I just talked about the arguments of this past weekend so this post feels a little biased. But I feel stuck. Part of feels like maybe I should leave him, but the other part of me sticks it out. Am I secretly addicted to the drama? Or maybe I don't have a strong enough will
submitted by Reisende8 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
I need some relationship life advice.
I '23/F' am currently involved with a '27/M' partner for a year now. I love him and he loves me, but I often wonder if our relationship is worth continuing. Half the time we are each others' best friend and lovers and we get along amazingly... however the other half of the time we argue over the stupidest things and the arguments go round and round in circles for a while (and I'm not joking, we argue SO fucking much). To give an example, just this past weekend I drove up to see him as well as celebrate his friends' family visiting from South America (we are long distance) and on the car ride there, I ask if we are staying in his motorhome he has there. He wouldn't give me a straight answer and I was wanting to know so that 1) we could save money instead of going to a hotel 2) we wouldn't have to worry about checkout times 3) I wanted to know where the hell I was driving to! Instead of giving me a straight answer about why he preferred to stay at a hotel, he went round in circles and got upset that I was asking. We eventually figured that argument out and it turns out he didn't want to stay in the motorhome because he still needed to clean it and he didn't want to welcome me in that kind of environment (the next day we went to his motorhome so I could help him organise).
That same night when we're celebrating his friend and her family, he starts smoking his friend's vape and is attached to it pretty much the whole night. Obviously it is his choice what he does with his body, but it sucks when your partner tells you he quite vaping/smoking and then as soon as he has the opportunity he picks it right back up again and blames his friends for his vaping problem. The group was playing some fun Brazilian music to dance to, and so I go up to my partner to ask him to dance with me and I playfully try to push the vape away from his hand (he was just sitting there vaping). I didn't slap his hand, I didn't forcefully take it away from him, I wasn't disrespectful in anyway - I was just trying to be playful and was hoping he would put it down and dance with me. I allowed my expectations to upset me. I was expecting/hoping that he would put it down and dance with me. Instead, he was like "not now babe" and reaches for another hit of nicotine. I got upset by this because we haven't seen each other in over a month, we only have a few hours together, and first he gets weird/upset about the motorhome thing and then it feels like he chooses spending time with the vape over dancing with the person he calls the love of his life. (and maybe I am overreacting with this particular situation, it just hurts watching him hurt his health like that then blame his friends and it feels like my partner has no self control when it comes to that kind of stuff).
That was Friday. On Sunday morning, his alarm went off at 6 am which of course also woke me up. He started getting up/moving around/making a bunch of noise, and I try asking him what's going on. No response. I ask again and I ask "Do we really need to be awake at 6?" because in my mind his flight back to his state isn't until the afternoon and I was the one taking him to the airport so do I need to start getting ready too?? like why are you up so early? can you please explain what is happening? Like the motorhome situation - in which he would not clearly explain what was going on - he just got mad at me saying I was tripping about the alarm and that I shouldn't ask him questions in that kind of tone of voice (what tone of voice?!?!?). He just started getting so upset that I asked if we needed to be up at that time and I was so confused by his response because it really didn't seem fair to me. When he got back in bed I did not want to be touched by him - I was so sad that I feel like I can't even ask my partner simple questions without him getting upset. He tried to go on explaining why I shouldn't ask questions like that and justifying his response. I get first thing in the morning after not much sleep people can be a little cranky, but dude to tell me I'm tripping and then evading my one question/getting defensive? not cool to me. After it's clear I'm not buying his response, he apologises and asks me to forgive his reaction, which I do and we're back to being fine. That day before dropping him at the airport, we drop off some his clothes we organised at the donation centre and then he realises he can't find his car or motorhome keys. so we spend the whole time before the airport with me driving him around to various locations to find his keys, we search my whole car, he has me search my entire bag... we can't find the fucking keys anywhere. But we were both like, no worries, they will show up somewhere. And we had a good time about it. No arguments, no complaints, he was grateful that I was helping him with his shit.
The next morning I find them in my car and I send him a picture with "omg babe, guess what I just found!" and instead of being relieved/happy that I found them, he BLAMES ME for not having seen the keys before. to be clear, I never once touched his motorhome keys. I had no idea until Sunday morning that we would even be looking for them. He blames ME for HIM losing HIS keys. I wouldn't take that shit from him. Then he went on saying that I need to "centre myself," that he has a right to feel the way he does blah blah, and sure he has a right to feel whatever he desires, but he has no right to blame me for anything! especially after I spent a good amount of time and fuel helping him do things he should've figured out on his own a long time ago and it is so easy to ship him the keys. not a big problem at all. and when I sent the key picture, he had a New York bottle opener on the keychain, and I was like "oh cool! Have you been to New York??" with the intention of getting to know my partner better - I think it's could he potentially took a trip there and I was asking in a light hearted way and his response (over voice message) was a sarcastic "yeah babe, I go there every weekend." Again, I don't understand this response. I don't understand why my question was so bad and why he felt like avoiding it? Maybe he was stressed about the whole key situation/ feeling jet lagged from the flight. But still. it sucked. I basically told him that I wouldn't take this shit from him that he cannot blame me and not take ownership of his own shit.
I just don't understand. I also have such a hard time leaving him. I tried before in the past - I felt pressured to move to Florida with him; he talked a lot about moving into together, having kids, etc etc and it was just moving too fast for me and I felt like I needed to leave because I can't give those things to him right now and it's not fair if that is something he wants and for me to stay in the relationship wanting different things at the moment. He convinces me to stay with him, saying he can wait for those things, but doesn't want to lose me. I stayed.
I'm just sooooo tired of these arguments! I'm tired of feeling like I can't ask basic questions without him getting upset. I'm tired of being made out to be the bad guy when I'm clearly not at fault. I'm tired of feeling like I acquiesce to him. I sometimes feel like he needs me more than I need him and I don't want to be his mother cleaning up after him/keeping track of his shit and then getting blamed when I don't know where HIS things are.
And we have silly arguments like this so much in the past too. I feel like maybe I'm deluding myself thinking that when we are together for longing periods of time that we won't argue so much - that it's the stress of travel that causes us to bicker. or that I'm holding on to the really good parts of the relationship where we make each other laugh so hard and we can meaningful conversations.
I worry that if we do someday have kids that they won't be able to come to him without him getting upset/weird/non-communicative. *sigh* what do I do? I know I just talked about the arguments of this past weekend so this post feels a little biased. But I feel stuck. Part of feels like maybe I should leave him, but the other part of me sticks it out. Am I secretly addicted to the drama? Or maybe I don't have a strong enough will
2024.05.14 03:58 Nuntius-Gris [PC] [Mid90'?] Forgotten futuristic RTS with VGA 3D-like graphics, multiple factions that shared units and bipedal robots.
Platform(s): PC
Genre: RTS (or something with multiple unit control)
Estimated year of release: This one is complicated. I think I played it mid 90's, but im pretty sure i found this game on one of those old CDs that came bundled with magazines, filled with demos, shareware, and maybe some full game from a small or in-house studio. So maybe the game is actually older than when I played it. My familiy used to buy "OK PC" and "OK PC GAMER" (Spain edition) back in the day, so maybe it could be found in some cd there.
Graphics/art style: I remember vivid, oversaturated flat colors, so I think it coul be VGA graphics, but i'm not really sure. Think a vast field of green, kind of like the original SimCity, but with less detail. I also remember there being small, polygonal units, but they could have been just sprites or pre-rendered. I belive the game/demo/match started with a splash screen where you chose your faction by clicking on one of ... six? eight? different color coded "flags" (squares with the symbol of the faction, like a clan or something). Everything was rether plain, without much detail (so nothing like Warcraft 1). The game was sci-fi and futuristic, and I distintly remember there being tanks and mostly....
Notable characters: some sort of bi-pedal mech walker. Think an AT-ST, but instead of a box its body was a cylinder. It had a tip that shoot fine lasers. Laser where a distinct line. And I've been hunting this sucker for the last years.
Notable gameplay mechanics: I don't really remember the gameplay specifics, but I do recall "discovering" that all factions had the same units, only they unlocked them at different stages/speeds. So, for example, i believe that the yellow faction had the easiest access to the bipedal mechs, whereas the red faction had an easier access to tanks. (Notice that I say "access" because maybe each faction started with a preassembled army, I sadly don't remember well)
Other details: It is definetly not a widely known or cult game, and I've never seen it mentioned in any retrospective or top list or anything, so we can exclude all the heavy hitters. I also remember thinking, even back then, that the name sounded rather silly. Some made up word like "Xaxon", "Zargon", something like that. But do have in mind that (1) english isn't my native language, so maybe it was a standard name and I just didn't know the word, and (2) all this happened a long time ago, so I may be remebering this (or other deatils) wrong >.<
Thanks in advance for just for reading all this! xD
submitted by Nuntius-Gris to tipofmyjoystick [link] [comments]
Genre: RTS (or something with multiple unit control)
Estimated year of release: This one is complicated. I think I played it mid 90's, but im pretty sure i found this game on one of those old CDs that came bundled with magazines, filled with demos, shareware, and maybe some full game from a small or in-house studio. So maybe the game is actually older than when I played it. My familiy used to buy "OK PC" and "OK PC GAMER" (Spain edition) back in the day, so maybe it could be found in some cd there.
Graphics/art style: I remember vivid, oversaturated flat colors, so I think it coul be VGA graphics, but i'm not really sure. Think a vast field of green, kind of like the original SimCity, but with less detail. I also remember there being small, polygonal units, but they could have been just sprites or pre-rendered. I belive the game/demo/match started with a splash screen where you chose your faction by clicking on one of ... six? eight? different color coded "flags" (squares with the symbol of the faction, like a clan or something). Everything was rether plain, without much detail (so nothing like Warcraft 1). The game was sci-fi and futuristic, and I distintly remember there being tanks and mostly....
Notable characters: some sort of bi-pedal mech walker. Think an AT-ST, but instead of a box its body was a cylinder. It had a tip that shoot fine lasers. Laser where a distinct line. And I've been hunting this sucker for the last years.
Notable gameplay mechanics: I don't really remember the gameplay specifics, but I do recall "discovering" that all factions had the same units, only they unlocked them at different stages/speeds. So, for example, i believe that the yellow faction had the easiest access to the bipedal mechs, whereas the red faction had an easier access to tanks. (Notice that I say "access" because maybe each faction started with a preassembled army, I sadly don't remember well)
Other details: It is definetly not a widely known or cult game, and I've never seen it mentioned in any retrospective or top list or anything, so we can exclude all the heavy hitters. I also remember thinking, even back then, that the name sounded rather silly. Some made up word like "Xaxon", "Zargon", something like that. But do have in mind that (1) english isn't my native language, so maybe it was a standard name and I just didn't know the word, and (2) all this happened a long time ago, so I may be remebering this (or other deatils) wrong >.<
Thanks in advance for just for reading all this! xD
2024.05.14 03:47 CheckUrCrawlspaces Growing up, my mother forbade me from ever talking about my little brother outside the house. 50 years later, they're both dead, and I'm ready to talk
The garage door shut with a groan behind us, closing us in the gloom of the single bulb hanging over the car.
Mother took a drag off her cigarette and sighed as she exhaled, the smoke filled the cabin of the Ford and stung my eyes.
“You really disappointed me today, Julianne," she tapped her cigarette in the ashtray below the dash, "you embarrassed me in front of the other mothers at the Ice Cream Social, shoveling down seconds and thirds like a pig. I thought I raised you better than that.”
She took another drag, daintily holding the cigarette between her perfectly manicured fingers.
“I'm going to have to tell your brother about this," she continued, “he'll have to come up with a punishment fit for a pig."
I felt my stomach drop. My kid brother, Thomas, was only six, but could be exceptionally cruel. Mother seemed to encourage him and was deferring to him more and more frequently for how the house was run, especially concerning my upbringing.
"Mother, please, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to embarrass you. I'm sorry I was a pig and ate so much ice cream. I promise I won't do it again, I'll never eat any ice cream again," I was pleading with stone, unyielding.
“Hush your mouth. Go to your room and wait for Thomas," she put out the cigarette and got out of the car, I had no choice but to follow.
It felt like walking to the gallows as I stepped inside the house and headed towards the stairs to go to my room. Thomas had grown fond recently of physical punishment, he obviously delighted in Mother whipping me with a belt or, recently, Mother had allowed him to start beating me with a wooden spoon. He would squeal and giggle like a normal child watching bubbles in the wind while I screamed. I was dreading whatever was going to happen tonight, I chastised myself for eating that ice cream, I should have known she would show up. My sins were always laid bare.
Down the hall, I could hear Thomas watching television in the den. I only got to watch TV for half an hour on Saturday morning and new episodes of Happy Days with Mother and Thomas. Thomas got to watch all the TV he wanted. He could listen to the radio and turntable as much as he wanted, as loud as he wanted. Thomas had an entire room just for his toys.
I entered my bedroom, it was a space I occupied, but it didn't feel like mine. Mother kept it spartan, white walls and white bedspread. A crucifix over the bed and a painting of Jesus over the door. I had my desk and chair and a dresser with some of the porcelain dolls Daddy gave me before he died that Mother let me keep. That was it.
I placed my book bag down and sat on my bed, waiting for Thomas. It was a while, sitting there with nothing but my own thoughts and staring at the open door. I felt humiliated, I was almost thirteen and my entire life was dictated by my brother. Mother kept the house in constant lockdown to keep Thomas a secret. No outsiders were allowed in. I couldn't have friends because she was afraid I would mention him or sneak a friend in to gawk at my brother and tease him for being different.
I would never make fun of him, I was terrified of him. Terrified of what he was and what he was becoming.
Eventually I heard his heavy footsteps coming up the stairs and I felt my heart start beating faster and my palms began to sweat. I kneaded my skirt in my hands, trying to calm myself and dry my palms. His slow arrhythmic footsteps came down the hall and I watched him as he entered the room.
I couldn't help but internally recoil at his appearance, even though I'd known him since he was born, I could never adjust to how unnatural he appeared. Thomas had been born at home and had never seen a doctor, but he was obviously unwell.
He was six years old and was barely over two feet tall, but very squat and wide. His skin was thick and gray, the whites of his beady eyes were yellow and his hair was wispy and white like an old man's, spreading out like a halo around his gargoyle face. A slight odor of decomposition hung about him, it reminded me faintly of garbage cans on a hot summer day. I hated when Mother made me help him with a bath, his skin felt like old brittle leather that flaked onto my clothes in gray flecks. His body was dense like concrete, I could barely lift him into the tub. Picking him up forced his hair into my face where that smell of rot would fill my nose, causing me to gag, silently, so as not to offend him and draw any ire from him or Mother.
Today, Thomas was wearing bib overalls with a red and green striped sweater underneath, reminding me of a grotesque doll.
“Mama says you acted like a piggy today at the ice cream social,” he spoke up to me in his unsettlingly high pitched, yet raspy voice, like a child that smoked as much as Mother, "you need to come down for dinner right now for your punishment for embarrassing Mama."
He turned and walked back down the stairs and I had no choice but to follow his toddling form downstairs to the dining table. We entered the kitchen and the table was placed with two settings. Mother was already seated and Thomas clambered up into his booster seat at his normal spot next to Mother. She took a drag off her cigarette and motioned vaguely to the floor without even looking at me.
Neatly situated on the linoleum was my dinner, not on a plate, but directly on the floor. A pork chop, scoop of mashed potatoes, and a small pile of peas. No utensils, either.
Thomas giggled with glee upon seeing my face.
“You have Mama's permission now to eat like a piggy, now. No hands! Piggies just use their face!” He stood up in his chair and reached out for Mother’s ash tray and flung it out over my meal, peppering my dinner with cigarette ash and butts.
"Oops! Piggies don't mind trash though, do they, Mama?” he giggled and the sound filled me with rage.
"No, they don't,” Mother replied coolly while maneuvering her ashtray back in place and carefully putting out her cigarette before saying prayer.
As angry as I was, I got down on my hands and knees and did my best at eating what I could without using my hands. I knew if I refused, it would be far worse. The whole meal, Thomas made pig noises and would reach down and poke me with his fork, making comments about what a fat piggy I was and how he wished he could roast and eat me. I doubted Mother would even object if he actually did kill me and eat me.
Gagging my way through another bite of ashy pork chop, I felt a warm splat over my head and heard Thomas giggling. I reached up and felt he had dumped mashed potatoes into my hair.
Choking down tears, I asked Mother if I could clean the floor and bathe. She rolled her eyes and excused me to clear the table for them as well while she changed Thomas into his pajamas. Picking him up, she walked out of the room and Thomas stuck his putrid little purple tongue out at me before they made it out the kitchen door.
I silently cried while I cleared the table and washed the dinner dishes. Tears splashed down as I mopped up the mess from my food on the floor. I hated how awful Thomas was. I hated how they treated me. Ever since Daddy died and Thomas showed up, I was their punching bag. I missed Daddy so much.
Mother was kinder then, too. She was still severe, but Dad kept her tempered. After he died, there was a change that came over her. I was only six, so I didn't remember her too much from before, but I did remember her gushing on and on when she was pregnant with Thomas. How the baby was a gift from Our Heavenly Father, that it was going to complete our broken family.
My sixth birthday happened right after Daddy died and I remember sitting on the patio crying while the house was full of people after the funeral, normally he would have gotten me a new doll and a chocolate bar, instead I was forgotten. No doll. No chocolate. Just funeral potatoes and a house full of cigarette smoke from the adults.
Nobody remembered. The closest thing I got was my dad's sister, Aunt Judy, sitting next to me on the patio step for a few minutes of comfortable silence before giving my shoulder a reassuring squeeze. I don't think she knew her brother was memorialized on my birthday. Next year, Thomas was born the day before my birthday, so it was completely eclipsed as Mother had just birthed her new love into the world…
I stopped mid mop as a lightbulb finally went off. I had never put much thought into the dates before.
Thomas was born a full year after Daddy died. He couldn't be his dad. Who was Thomas’ actual father?
Washing mashed potatoes out of my hair that evening, I ran over and over the timeline. No matter how I parsed it out, Thomas was only my half brother. Going to bed that night, I kept myself awake, going over and over again to make sure. I couldn't remember any men being around at that time, but that didn't mean much. Adults can easily hide things from children. Tension began throbbing through my head and I felt queasy. Mother had always known all of my secrets, able to sniff them out like a bloodhound out or using Thomas to spy. Now I had one of Mother's secrets and I didn't know what to do with it.
First I wanted to confirm it, but it would mean snooping, which was difficult in a house that was rarely left empty. I would have to try finding Mother's calendar book or journal to see if she mentioned any dates or men.
But when could I attempt such a daring maneuver? Thomas hardly left the house. As proud as Mother was of him, she was very cognizant and protective of his differences and didn't want to draw attention to herself or Thomas like that. Mother herself had few social engagements throughout the week and mostly stayed home to watch her golden child.
I finally decided I would take the risk and fake sick on Tuesday, grocery day, so I could stay home from school while she went shopping. All Thomas did all day was watch TV downstairs, so that should give me about an hour to look through her room for clues. I decided to tuck my head down, try to behave as best as I could to avoid their wrath, and wait for Tuesday.
That weekend limped along agonizingly slow. Thomas was in a fine mood and was constantly seeking out a reason to poke me, punch me, slap me… he'd laugh while calling me a piggy with his off-putting wide mouth. I tried to mostly stay in my room and it seemed like neither of them cared.
School on Monday was a relief, but my anxiety ramped up. The consequences would be dire if Mother caught on that I was faking sick to stay home. I didn't even want to imagine how off the leash she'd let my half-brother become in his punishment for that level of insubordination.
I stayed up all night, my stomach was in knots, but I was committed to my plan. Throughout the night, I screamed as hard as I could into my pillow. Screamed until my throat was raw and I could barely talk. It felt cathartic in a way. When it was close to school time, I put on my heaviest flannel pajamas and began doing jumping jacks until my face was flushed and my scalp was soaked with sweat.
Looking in the bathroom mirror before heading down to talk to Mother, I thought I looked pretty convincing, my skin was flushed and sweaty, my eyes had circles under them from lack of sleep, and my voice croaked like a frog.
Heading downstairs, Mother was already feeding Thomas breakfast. I hesitantly stepped into the kitchen and stood there awkwardly for a second, pawing with my pajamas to keep my nerves steady until she noticed my presence and looked up.
“Why aren't you dressed, Julianne?"
"I don't feel well. My throat hurts and my tummy hurts.” My voice graveled out more than I was expecting, I really had hurt my throat.
She strode over to me and placed a cool hand on my sweaty brow.
"You do feel warm. Take an aspirin from the medicine cabinet and go lay back down. I'll check on you later," with that she turned back and walked over to Thomas, who was frozen in place, glaring at me over a forkful of scrambled eggs. The sharp glint of malice in his beady eyes made me shiver before I shuffled out of the kitchen.
I laid in bed, trying my best to look miserable until I eventually heard the faint sound of the television playing in the den as Thomas settled in for his normal daytime routine and the garage door opened as Mother headed to the grocery store. I bounded out of bed and watched the car back out of our driveway and head up the street.
My heart began to pound as I tiptoed down the hall to Mother's bedroom, a place I rarely even caught a glimpse of, let alone entered. I very slowly opened the door, taking great care to not make any noise to alert Thomas downstairs that I was out of bed.
Creeping into the butter yellow room, I could feel my heartbeat pounding in my skull, this was the naughtiest thing I had ever done by far. I stepped onto the rug to help disguise my footsteps and slowly made my way past the brass bed and towards her desk. My hands shook as I opened the top drawer, I pawed through rapidly and found nothing. I checked the next drawer down and again found nothing of interest, just stationary and envelopes.
Finally, the bottom drawer was what I was looking for, a stack of journals from the past decade. I flipped through, trying to find entries relevant to when Daddy died and who Mother slept with afterwards.
I've never fully recovered from what I read.
July 6, 1968
Edgar died today. Car accident. I cannot believe this is real. My light, my life, my anchor... Dr. Benson gave me a sedative at the hospital and I feel so tired. So very, very tired. Why has my Lord forsaken me so?
July 9, 1968
I feel like I am in a very bad dream, I feel numb and disconnected. All the consolation and pity from everyone makes me feel sick. After the memorial, it took everything in me to not break dishes and to scream at everyone to get out of my house. Julianne was moping about crying and I wanted to throw her out, too.
If I hadn't seen my dear Edgar's body in the hospital and held his urn in my own hands, I wouldn't believe he was really gone. I still don't entirely believe it.
I have prayed to God every night asking him to show me why he took my husband from me and I have gotten no answer.
I skimmed over the next few months, as it was more or less similar sentiments repeated night after night. I finally got to an entry that caught my eye.
September 17, 1968
My battle with my faith has been fraught the past few months, but Hallelujah! I feel I can see the Lord again in all his glory and might, for he has given me a way to reconnect to my Edgar!
I was thinking about the night Julianne was born, right in this very home, it was a difficult birth and she struggled to breathe at first. Ingrid, my midwife, made a comment to me that if the baby had failed to wake up on her own, that Ingrid had ways to make sure she would have made it.
I remember asking if it was a medical methodology and she made it clear to me that in certain circumstances, it was a mystical property she used to bring the air of life into a struggling baby's lungs. She gently alluded to being a practicing member of the dark arts. At the time, I felt quite scandalized to have someone like that in my God fearing home. Now I see her as the answer to my prayers! My angel!
On a whim, I called her and asked if she still practiced such techniques. She hesitantly confirmed that she did. I asked, if she could turn breath into the lungs of a child without, could she turn breath into a child that did not exist? Could she magick into existence another child of my beloved Edgar? She told me she had to do some research and she'd be back in touch.
Ingrid just called back after a few hours and said there was a spell she found, but it was dangerous and might have unpleasant results. I said, yes, of course! I trust my Lord and I believe he sent this woman of blessed magick to me for this purpose.
She says we will have to do it soon, in a few days during the new moon. She has a potion to brew, but it is happening! Praise God!
September 23, 1968
The ceremony was last night, and Ingrid believes it was a success, but we will have to wait. It did not take long, only an hour or two. Ingrid lit my bedroom with many beeswax candles and she had me drink a thick and bitter tea that caused me to become quite relaxed and foggy.
From my inner thigh, she cut me and collected my blood in a chalice, with which she mixed quite a lot of Edgar's ashes and other ingredients which I could not glean from my supine position and groggy wits. Ingrid began to chant, calling upon a higher power, as I pleaded with my Lord to let this work. To give me any piece of my Edgar back. She came to the bed and worked the paste between my legs into my womanly chamber, which was very uncomfortable, but manageable with the numbing effects of the tea.
She continued to sit with me and chant, her hand placed over my womb, until she decided at which time it was complete. She left and I fell into a deep sleep. When I woke up this morning, I felt quite uncomfortable, my body ached and when I used the restroom, a yellow fluid like pus poured out of me, but no sign of any ashes or blood, which gives me hope it was absorbed into my womb.
November 3, 1968
Praise be to our Lord, Ingrid just confirmed for me that I am with child, I had been hoping so, I had not gotten my cycle in October, but I wasn't sure if that was because of the discharge like pus that was still coming. She told me that was common with this spell and a side effect that would stop after the baby came.
I feel like I am floating on air, for the first time since Edgar left, I feel-
I suddenly became very aware of the feeling of eyes on the back of my head. I had become too engrossed in what was written before me and I had lost track of my surroundings. Very slowly, I turned around and my heart began pounding again as I saw Thomas standing in the doorway holding his wooden spoon in one hand. How had I not heard him?
He pointed at me with his empty hand and screamed, just a pure guttural screech from somewhere deep inside his disgusting little body. He charged at me from across the room, his horrible feet thumping solidly along the rug. He began beating my legs ruthlessly with the spoon, causing my legs to buckle. I crashed down to my knees in front of him, and he began lashing at my face, pulling my hair with one hand while wailing away at my head with the spoon.
I had dropped the journal I was holding and was desperately trying to get a hand on the spoon or push him away. All I could hear was him screaming. My arms flailed and I reached around on Mother's desk and grabbed onto the first thing I found and sank it into Thomas’ neck.
The end of Mother's gold letter opener protruded under his jaw. He went silent and he looked at me with utter shock. He dropped the spoon and collapsed on the ground, clutching at his neck as his thick black blood oozed out from his wound, letting out a stupendous odor of rot that filled the room. He didn't really say anything or make any noise. He just twitched for a moment and I saw his eyes glaze over.
In shock, I stood over his little body for a moment and I watched as he seemed to mummify in just a few minutes, like an ash person from Pompeii dressed in jeans and a flannel shirt. Even his blood that looked like shiny oil a second ago became like potting soil on Mother's rug. Reaching out to touch his hand, it crumbled away like sand.
Panic ran through me like a rabbit caught in a snare. Not knowing what to do, I ran. I ran down the hall, changed my clothes, put an extra change of clothes in my backpack and the last doll Daddy had ever given me and I ran. Mother would absolutely never forgive me and I was genuinely afraid she would kill me in retaliation for taking her beloved Thomas away from her. Her precious gift from God. My feet flew over the pavement and took me away from that house.
I called my Aunt Judy from a payphone outside the five & dime, and told her Mother had kicked me out and asked if I could stay with her. She had always had a strained relationship with my mother and it didn't take much convincing that she had kicked out her “only” child. Only Mother, Ingrid, and I ever knew about Thomas.
She gave me a home and took care of me. She never beat me or humiliated me. Even with her love, I was far from okay. For years I would close my eyes and hear Thomas scream, then the sudden silence. I'd see him fumbling at his neck and turning to ash. But I would also remember all the ways he would hurt me and how bad he was becoming. I could never talk to anyone about it, especially not the silent relief I felt I refused to admit to myself. Over time, however, Thomas' screams became a whisper and his silence faded into dust in my mind.
I moved on with my life. I went to college and became a photojournalist, getting to travel the world and watch history unfold. By choice, I never married, but was quite blessed with many beautiful friendships for companionship over the decades. I found balance in my life and a sense of happiness, if not peace. I never could quite stomach mashed potatoes again, though, they always taste ashy to me.
Mother never made any attempts to reach out to me or find me, at least that I'm aware of. Ten years ago, I was contacted by a hospital and they said my mother had been admitted earlier after falling and was about to pass, so she must have kept some tabs on me to know my phone number for her emergency contacts. Apparently she had collapsed in the driveway and a neighbor called an ambulance. I got there and her only words to me were, “take care of him," as she placed a locket in my hand. I opened the locket, Jesus was on one side, Thomas on the other. I didn't say anything to her, just held her frail old hand with nicotine stained nails until she passed in the night. My mother was gone and I felt nothing except a vague sense of relief.
When I got to her house, it was like a time capsule. Other than a newer television, it was just like it was when I'd fled so many years ago. The smell of tobacco smoke hung like incense in the air. It felt oppressive, like a tomb.
I wandered the house in a bit of a daze. The one place I didn't want to go was upstairs. I didn't want to see my old room, or Thomas' room, or Mother's. Putting it off, I went to fix myself some supper, realizing I hadn't eaten in almost a day. I took a pause when I opened the fridge and saw a baby bottle on a shelf. Silently praying she had been babysitting for a neighbor, I fixed myself some toast with sardines and sat eating in the den watching TV. It had been almost forty years and it still felt rebellious not eating at the table and watching TV without permission.
My eyes grew heavy and I finally mustered up the gumption to head upstairs to go to bed. The stairs creaked in a familiar way under my feet and I was taken back to the feeling of dread hearing either Mother or Thomas climbing up. My old room was at the top of the stairs, I saw the door was nailed shut and had rambling quotes about Judas copied from the Bible in my mother's handwriting taped to the door. I sighed gently and turned from the door to head down the hallway, deciding Mother's room was probably the best place to sleep.
I passed by Thomas’ toy room and I heard a murmur from the room. I stopped, curiosity got the best of me and I entered. In Thomas' old toy room was a crib with joyful clown sheets. Dread swelled up inside me as I heard more murmurs and saw the sheets move. Approaching slowly, I peaked under the sheet and gasped.
Tucked inside was what looked like a baby gargoyle, gray and papery looking. Pus leaked out of its milky, bulbous eyes. I pulled back the blanket and saw it had no legs and its arms bent back, like wings on a bird. It was wearing just a cloth diaper, overflowing with tarry looking stool that took my breath away with its pungency, it smelled like Thomas’ blood, but somehow worse. My heart broke for this poor creature, Lord only knows how many years it has been in this crib suffering from its unholy existence.
So this is who Mother had wanted me to take care of…
Not knowing what else to do, I gently scooped him up. Like Thomas, he was shockingly heavy for how small his body was. Placing him on the changing table, I cleaned him and rewrapped his bottom in a clean diaper cloth. It was difficult, he fussed tremendously, crying and flopping around as much as his flipper-like arms would allow. I tried wiping off his oozing eyes and he snapped his mouth, which I saw was full of disturbingly square yellow teeth, trying to bite me. I carried him to the kitchen and rocked him while I heated up his bottle and he became furious with me, almost barking like a dog when my hand would get near his face.
He settled a bit as he fed, but he would still sometimes suddenly spit out the bottle and attempt to bite me. I laid him back in his crib, this abomination in a clown sheet, and I walked down the hall to Mother's room letting out a long sigh.
Combing through my mother's journals in the early hours of the morning, it looked like she tried the ceremony again shortly after Thomas died, but she either lacked Ingrid’s help or didn't have enough of my father's ashes left. Something went terribly wrong. She was vaguer than she had been about Thomas’ conception, but I suspect she had used some of Thomas' remains. The resulting birth she named Isaac.
Mother's journals told a sad tale of her and Isaac's suffering. She never mentioned me, but lamented the loss of Thomas and Dad relentlessly. She was hyper protective of Isaac, as that was all she had left. If her world had been small before, it became microscopic after he entered her life, requiring nearly constant care. According to Mother, he was blind and colicky, sometimes going years at a time without sleeping through the night. She had breast fed him for years, but she had to stop after he grew teeth and began biting her intentionally and feeding on her blood.
I spent a lot of time over the next few days pondering what to do. I had to get her estate in order, she had left me the house, in an obvious attempt to get me to continue caretaking for Isaac, but I didn't want it. I had my own cozy home an hour away from here, filled with happy memories and my possessions acquired traveling the world. Mother's home had a heavy energy I couldn't shake. Her and Thomas were both gone, but the memories of the scoldings and beatings hung in every corner, like cobwebs that would never sweep away.
So, I fed Isaac and kept him clean and tried to keep him company, although he seemed to hate me passionately. I took care of him, all the while thinking about what I was going to do. After a week, I felt resolute in what had to be done.
Gathering up all of Mother's journals in a tote, I made my way to Isaac and picked him up and carried everything to the living room.
The ancient logs in the fireplace meant for display ignited instantly. One by one, I fed the journals into the fire, burning away years of my mother's consuming sorrow. Isaac fussed and moaned next to me the entire time. When the last pages shimmered away into lacy ash, I took a throw pillow off the couch and gently cradled Isaac in my other arm. It didn't take long before he stopped struggling and I felt his little body relax after decades of suffering.
I gently wrapped up a bundle in a clown sheet and placed it in the fire. It burned furiously, like the paper in my mother's journals, and was soon gone. Nothing but ashes and embers.
“Don't worry, Mother,” I said purely for my own sake, "I took care of Isaac for you."
And finally, I felt at peace.
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Mother took a drag off her cigarette and sighed as she exhaled, the smoke filled the cabin of the Ford and stung my eyes.
“You really disappointed me today, Julianne," she tapped her cigarette in the ashtray below the dash, "you embarrassed me in front of the other mothers at the Ice Cream Social, shoveling down seconds and thirds like a pig. I thought I raised you better than that.”
She took another drag, daintily holding the cigarette between her perfectly manicured fingers.
“I'm going to have to tell your brother about this," she continued, “he'll have to come up with a punishment fit for a pig."
I felt my stomach drop. My kid brother, Thomas, was only six, but could be exceptionally cruel. Mother seemed to encourage him and was deferring to him more and more frequently for how the house was run, especially concerning my upbringing.
"Mother, please, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to embarrass you. I'm sorry I was a pig and ate so much ice cream. I promise I won't do it again, I'll never eat any ice cream again," I was pleading with stone, unyielding.
“Hush your mouth. Go to your room and wait for Thomas," she put out the cigarette and got out of the car, I had no choice but to follow.
It felt like walking to the gallows as I stepped inside the house and headed towards the stairs to go to my room. Thomas had grown fond recently of physical punishment, he obviously delighted in Mother whipping me with a belt or, recently, Mother had allowed him to start beating me with a wooden spoon. He would squeal and giggle like a normal child watching bubbles in the wind while I screamed. I was dreading whatever was going to happen tonight, I chastised myself for eating that ice cream, I should have known she would show up. My sins were always laid bare.
Down the hall, I could hear Thomas watching television in the den. I only got to watch TV for half an hour on Saturday morning and new episodes of Happy Days with Mother and Thomas. Thomas got to watch all the TV he wanted. He could listen to the radio and turntable as much as he wanted, as loud as he wanted. Thomas had an entire room just for his toys.
I entered my bedroom, it was a space I occupied, but it didn't feel like mine. Mother kept it spartan, white walls and white bedspread. A crucifix over the bed and a painting of Jesus over the door. I had my desk and chair and a dresser with some of the porcelain dolls Daddy gave me before he died that Mother let me keep. That was it.
I placed my book bag down and sat on my bed, waiting for Thomas. It was a while, sitting there with nothing but my own thoughts and staring at the open door. I felt humiliated, I was almost thirteen and my entire life was dictated by my brother. Mother kept the house in constant lockdown to keep Thomas a secret. No outsiders were allowed in. I couldn't have friends because she was afraid I would mention him or sneak a friend in to gawk at my brother and tease him for being different.
I would never make fun of him, I was terrified of him. Terrified of what he was and what he was becoming.
Eventually I heard his heavy footsteps coming up the stairs and I felt my heart start beating faster and my palms began to sweat. I kneaded my skirt in my hands, trying to calm myself and dry my palms. His slow arrhythmic footsteps came down the hall and I watched him as he entered the room.
I couldn't help but internally recoil at his appearance, even though I'd known him since he was born, I could never adjust to how unnatural he appeared. Thomas had been born at home and had never seen a doctor, but he was obviously unwell.
He was six years old and was barely over two feet tall, but very squat and wide. His skin was thick and gray, the whites of his beady eyes were yellow and his hair was wispy and white like an old man's, spreading out like a halo around his gargoyle face. A slight odor of decomposition hung about him, it reminded me faintly of garbage cans on a hot summer day. I hated when Mother made me help him with a bath, his skin felt like old brittle leather that flaked onto my clothes in gray flecks. His body was dense like concrete, I could barely lift him into the tub. Picking him up forced his hair into my face where that smell of rot would fill my nose, causing me to gag, silently, so as not to offend him and draw any ire from him or Mother.
Today, Thomas was wearing bib overalls with a red and green striped sweater underneath, reminding me of a grotesque doll.
“Mama says you acted like a piggy today at the ice cream social,” he spoke up to me in his unsettlingly high pitched, yet raspy voice, like a child that smoked as much as Mother, "you need to come down for dinner right now for your punishment for embarrassing Mama."
He turned and walked back down the stairs and I had no choice but to follow his toddling form downstairs to the dining table. We entered the kitchen and the table was placed with two settings. Mother was already seated and Thomas clambered up into his booster seat at his normal spot next to Mother. She took a drag off her cigarette and motioned vaguely to the floor without even looking at me.
Neatly situated on the linoleum was my dinner, not on a plate, but directly on the floor. A pork chop, scoop of mashed potatoes, and a small pile of peas. No utensils, either.
Thomas giggled with glee upon seeing my face.
“You have Mama's permission now to eat like a piggy, now. No hands! Piggies just use their face!” He stood up in his chair and reached out for Mother’s ash tray and flung it out over my meal, peppering my dinner with cigarette ash and butts.
"Oops! Piggies don't mind trash though, do they, Mama?” he giggled and the sound filled me with rage.
"No, they don't,” Mother replied coolly while maneuvering her ashtray back in place and carefully putting out her cigarette before saying prayer.
As angry as I was, I got down on my hands and knees and did my best at eating what I could without using my hands. I knew if I refused, it would be far worse. The whole meal, Thomas made pig noises and would reach down and poke me with his fork, making comments about what a fat piggy I was and how he wished he could roast and eat me. I doubted Mother would even object if he actually did kill me and eat me.
Gagging my way through another bite of ashy pork chop, I felt a warm splat over my head and heard Thomas giggling. I reached up and felt he had dumped mashed potatoes into my hair.
Choking down tears, I asked Mother if I could clean the floor and bathe. She rolled her eyes and excused me to clear the table for them as well while she changed Thomas into his pajamas. Picking him up, she walked out of the room and Thomas stuck his putrid little purple tongue out at me before they made it out the kitchen door.
I silently cried while I cleared the table and washed the dinner dishes. Tears splashed down as I mopped up the mess from my food on the floor. I hated how awful Thomas was. I hated how they treated me. Ever since Daddy died and Thomas showed up, I was their punching bag. I missed Daddy so much.
Mother was kinder then, too. She was still severe, but Dad kept her tempered. After he died, there was a change that came over her. I was only six, so I didn't remember her too much from before, but I did remember her gushing on and on when she was pregnant with Thomas. How the baby was a gift from Our Heavenly Father, that it was going to complete our broken family.
My sixth birthday happened right after Daddy died and I remember sitting on the patio crying while the house was full of people after the funeral, normally he would have gotten me a new doll and a chocolate bar, instead I was forgotten. No doll. No chocolate. Just funeral potatoes and a house full of cigarette smoke from the adults.
Nobody remembered. The closest thing I got was my dad's sister, Aunt Judy, sitting next to me on the patio step for a few minutes of comfortable silence before giving my shoulder a reassuring squeeze. I don't think she knew her brother was memorialized on my birthday. Next year, Thomas was born the day before my birthday, so it was completely eclipsed as Mother had just birthed her new love into the world…
I stopped mid mop as a lightbulb finally went off. I had never put much thought into the dates before.
Thomas was born a full year after Daddy died. He couldn't be his dad. Who was Thomas’ actual father?
Washing mashed potatoes out of my hair that evening, I ran over and over the timeline. No matter how I parsed it out, Thomas was only my half brother. Going to bed that night, I kept myself awake, going over and over again to make sure. I couldn't remember any men being around at that time, but that didn't mean much. Adults can easily hide things from children. Tension began throbbing through my head and I felt queasy. Mother had always known all of my secrets, able to sniff them out like a bloodhound out or using Thomas to spy. Now I had one of Mother's secrets and I didn't know what to do with it.
First I wanted to confirm it, but it would mean snooping, which was difficult in a house that was rarely left empty. I would have to try finding Mother's calendar book or journal to see if she mentioned any dates or men.
But when could I attempt such a daring maneuver? Thomas hardly left the house. As proud as Mother was of him, she was very cognizant and protective of his differences and didn't want to draw attention to herself or Thomas like that. Mother herself had few social engagements throughout the week and mostly stayed home to watch her golden child.
I finally decided I would take the risk and fake sick on Tuesday, grocery day, so I could stay home from school while she went shopping. All Thomas did all day was watch TV downstairs, so that should give me about an hour to look through her room for clues. I decided to tuck my head down, try to behave as best as I could to avoid their wrath, and wait for Tuesday.
That weekend limped along agonizingly slow. Thomas was in a fine mood and was constantly seeking out a reason to poke me, punch me, slap me… he'd laugh while calling me a piggy with his off-putting wide mouth. I tried to mostly stay in my room and it seemed like neither of them cared.
School on Monday was a relief, but my anxiety ramped up. The consequences would be dire if Mother caught on that I was faking sick to stay home. I didn't even want to imagine how off the leash she'd let my half-brother become in his punishment for that level of insubordination.
I stayed up all night, my stomach was in knots, but I was committed to my plan. Throughout the night, I screamed as hard as I could into my pillow. Screamed until my throat was raw and I could barely talk. It felt cathartic in a way. When it was close to school time, I put on my heaviest flannel pajamas and began doing jumping jacks until my face was flushed and my scalp was soaked with sweat.
Looking in the bathroom mirror before heading down to talk to Mother, I thought I looked pretty convincing, my skin was flushed and sweaty, my eyes had circles under them from lack of sleep, and my voice croaked like a frog.
Heading downstairs, Mother was already feeding Thomas breakfast. I hesitantly stepped into the kitchen and stood there awkwardly for a second, pawing with my pajamas to keep my nerves steady until she noticed my presence and looked up.
“Why aren't you dressed, Julianne?"
"I don't feel well. My throat hurts and my tummy hurts.” My voice graveled out more than I was expecting, I really had hurt my throat.
She strode over to me and placed a cool hand on my sweaty brow.
"You do feel warm. Take an aspirin from the medicine cabinet and go lay back down. I'll check on you later," with that she turned back and walked over to Thomas, who was frozen in place, glaring at me over a forkful of scrambled eggs. The sharp glint of malice in his beady eyes made me shiver before I shuffled out of the kitchen.
I laid in bed, trying my best to look miserable until I eventually heard the faint sound of the television playing in the den as Thomas settled in for his normal daytime routine and the garage door opened as Mother headed to the grocery store. I bounded out of bed and watched the car back out of our driveway and head up the street.
My heart began to pound as I tiptoed down the hall to Mother's bedroom, a place I rarely even caught a glimpse of, let alone entered. I very slowly opened the door, taking great care to not make any noise to alert Thomas downstairs that I was out of bed.
Creeping into the butter yellow room, I could feel my heartbeat pounding in my skull, this was the naughtiest thing I had ever done by far. I stepped onto the rug to help disguise my footsteps and slowly made my way past the brass bed and towards her desk. My hands shook as I opened the top drawer, I pawed through rapidly and found nothing. I checked the next drawer down and again found nothing of interest, just stationary and envelopes.
Finally, the bottom drawer was what I was looking for, a stack of journals from the past decade. I flipped through, trying to find entries relevant to when Daddy died and who Mother slept with afterwards.
I've never fully recovered from what I read.
July 6, 1968
Edgar died today. Car accident. I cannot believe this is real. My light, my life, my anchor... Dr. Benson gave me a sedative at the hospital and I feel so tired. So very, very tired. Why has my Lord forsaken me so?
July 9, 1968
I feel like I am in a very bad dream, I feel numb and disconnected. All the consolation and pity from everyone makes me feel sick. After the memorial, it took everything in me to not break dishes and to scream at everyone to get out of my house. Julianne was moping about crying and I wanted to throw her out, too.
If I hadn't seen my dear Edgar's body in the hospital and held his urn in my own hands, I wouldn't believe he was really gone. I still don't entirely believe it.
I have prayed to God every night asking him to show me why he took my husband from me and I have gotten no answer.
I skimmed over the next few months, as it was more or less similar sentiments repeated night after night. I finally got to an entry that caught my eye.
September 17, 1968
My battle with my faith has been fraught the past few months, but Hallelujah! I feel I can see the Lord again in all his glory and might, for he has given me a way to reconnect to my Edgar!
I was thinking about the night Julianne was born, right in this very home, it was a difficult birth and she struggled to breathe at first. Ingrid, my midwife, made a comment to me that if the baby had failed to wake up on her own, that Ingrid had ways to make sure she would have made it.
I remember asking if it was a medical methodology and she made it clear to me that in certain circumstances, it was a mystical property she used to bring the air of life into a struggling baby's lungs. She gently alluded to being a practicing member of the dark arts. At the time, I felt quite scandalized to have someone like that in my God fearing home. Now I see her as the answer to my prayers! My angel!
On a whim, I called her and asked if she still practiced such techniques. She hesitantly confirmed that she did. I asked, if she could turn breath into the lungs of a child without, could she turn breath into a child that did not exist? Could she magick into existence another child of my beloved Edgar? She told me she had to do some research and she'd be back in touch.
Ingrid just called back after a few hours and said there was a spell she found, but it was dangerous and might have unpleasant results. I said, yes, of course! I trust my Lord and I believe he sent this woman of blessed magick to me for this purpose.
She says we will have to do it soon, in a few days during the new moon. She has a potion to brew, but it is happening! Praise God!
September 23, 1968
The ceremony was last night, and Ingrid believes it was a success, but we will have to wait. It did not take long, only an hour or two. Ingrid lit my bedroom with many beeswax candles and she had me drink a thick and bitter tea that caused me to become quite relaxed and foggy.
From my inner thigh, she cut me and collected my blood in a chalice, with which she mixed quite a lot of Edgar's ashes and other ingredients which I could not glean from my supine position and groggy wits. Ingrid began to chant, calling upon a higher power, as I pleaded with my Lord to let this work. To give me any piece of my Edgar back. She came to the bed and worked the paste between my legs into my womanly chamber, which was very uncomfortable, but manageable with the numbing effects of the tea.
She continued to sit with me and chant, her hand placed over my womb, until she decided at which time it was complete. She left and I fell into a deep sleep. When I woke up this morning, I felt quite uncomfortable, my body ached and when I used the restroom, a yellow fluid like pus poured out of me, but no sign of any ashes or blood, which gives me hope it was absorbed into my womb.
November 3, 1968
Praise be to our Lord, Ingrid just confirmed for me that I am with child, I had been hoping so, I had not gotten my cycle in October, but I wasn't sure if that was because of the discharge like pus that was still coming. She told me that was common with this spell and a side effect that would stop after the baby came.
I feel like I am floating on air, for the first time since Edgar left, I feel-
I suddenly became very aware of the feeling of eyes on the back of my head. I had become too engrossed in what was written before me and I had lost track of my surroundings. Very slowly, I turned around and my heart began pounding again as I saw Thomas standing in the doorway holding his wooden spoon in one hand. How had I not heard him?
He pointed at me with his empty hand and screamed, just a pure guttural screech from somewhere deep inside his disgusting little body. He charged at me from across the room, his horrible feet thumping solidly along the rug. He began beating my legs ruthlessly with the spoon, causing my legs to buckle. I crashed down to my knees in front of him, and he began lashing at my face, pulling my hair with one hand while wailing away at my head with the spoon.
I had dropped the journal I was holding and was desperately trying to get a hand on the spoon or push him away. All I could hear was him screaming. My arms flailed and I reached around on Mother's desk and grabbed onto the first thing I found and sank it into Thomas’ neck.
The end of Mother's gold letter opener protruded under his jaw. He went silent and he looked at me with utter shock. He dropped the spoon and collapsed on the ground, clutching at his neck as his thick black blood oozed out from his wound, letting out a stupendous odor of rot that filled the room. He didn't really say anything or make any noise. He just twitched for a moment and I saw his eyes glaze over.
In shock, I stood over his little body for a moment and I watched as he seemed to mummify in just a few minutes, like an ash person from Pompeii dressed in jeans and a flannel shirt. Even his blood that looked like shiny oil a second ago became like potting soil on Mother's rug. Reaching out to touch his hand, it crumbled away like sand.
Panic ran through me like a rabbit caught in a snare. Not knowing what to do, I ran. I ran down the hall, changed my clothes, put an extra change of clothes in my backpack and the last doll Daddy had ever given me and I ran. Mother would absolutely never forgive me and I was genuinely afraid she would kill me in retaliation for taking her beloved Thomas away from her. Her precious gift from God. My feet flew over the pavement and took me away from that house.
I called my Aunt Judy from a payphone outside the five & dime, and told her Mother had kicked me out and asked if I could stay with her. She had always had a strained relationship with my mother and it didn't take much convincing that she had kicked out her “only” child. Only Mother, Ingrid, and I ever knew about Thomas.
She gave me a home and took care of me. She never beat me or humiliated me. Even with her love, I was far from okay. For years I would close my eyes and hear Thomas scream, then the sudden silence. I'd see him fumbling at his neck and turning to ash. But I would also remember all the ways he would hurt me and how bad he was becoming. I could never talk to anyone about it, especially not the silent relief I felt I refused to admit to myself. Over time, however, Thomas' screams became a whisper and his silence faded into dust in my mind.
I moved on with my life. I went to college and became a photojournalist, getting to travel the world and watch history unfold. By choice, I never married, but was quite blessed with many beautiful friendships for companionship over the decades. I found balance in my life and a sense of happiness, if not peace. I never could quite stomach mashed potatoes again, though, they always taste ashy to me.
Mother never made any attempts to reach out to me or find me, at least that I'm aware of. Ten years ago, I was contacted by a hospital and they said my mother had been admitted earlier after falling and was about to pass, so she must have kept some tabs on me to know my phone number for her emergency contacts. Apparently she had collapsed in the driveway and a neighbor called an ambulance. I got there and her only words to me were, “take care of him," as she placed a locket in my hand. I opened the locket, Jesus was on one side, Thomas on the other. I didn't say anything to her, just held her frail old hand with nicotine stained nails until she passed in the night. My mother was gone and I felt nothing except a vague sense of relief.
When I got to her house, it was like a time capsule. Other than a newer television, it was just like it was when I'd fled so many years ago. The smell of tobacco smoke hung like incense in the air. It felt oppressive, like a tomb.
I wandered the house in a bit of a daze. The one place I didn't want to go was upstairs. I didn't want to see my old room, or Thomas' room, or Mother's. Putting it off, I went to fix myself some supper, realizing I hadn't eaten in almost a day. I took a pause when I opened the fridge and saw a baby bottle on a shelf. Silently praying she had been babysitting for a neighbor, I fixed myself some toast with sardines and sat eating in the den watching TV. It had been almost forty years and it still felt rebellious not eating at the table and watching TV without permission.
My eyes grew heavy and I finally mustered up the gumption to head upstairs to go to bed. The stairs creaked in a familiar way under my feet and I was taken back to the feeling of dread hearing either Mother or Thomas climbing up. My old room was at the top of the stairs, I saw the door was nailed shut and had rambling quotes about Judas copied from the Bible in my mother's handwriting taped to the door. I sighed gently and turned from the door to head down the hallway, deciding Mother's room was probably the best place to sleep.
I passed by Thomas’ toy room and I heard a murmur from the room. I stopped, curiosity got the best of me and I entered. In Thomas' old toy room was a crib with joyful clown sheets. Dread swelled up inside me as I heard more murmurs and saw the sheets move. Approaching slowly, I peaked under the sheet and gasped.
Tucked inside was what looked like a baby gargoyle, gray and papery looking. Pus leaked out of its milky, bulbous eyes. I pulled back the blanket and saw it had no legs and its arms bent back, like wings on a bird. It was wearing just a cloth diaper, overflowing with tarry looking stool that took my breath away with its pungency, it smelled like Thomas’ blood, but somehow worse. My heart broke for this poor creature, Lord only knows how many years it has been in this crib suffering from its unholy existence.
So this is who Mother had wanted me to take care of…
Not knowing what else to do, I gently scooped him up. Like Thomas, he was shockingly heavy for how small his body was. Placing him on the changing table, I cleaned him and rewrapped his bottom in a clean diaper cloth. It was difficult, he fussed tremendously, crying and flopping around as much as his flipper-like arms would allow. I tried wiping off his oozing eyes and he snapped his mouth, which I saw was full of disturbingly square yellow teeth, trying to bite me. I carried him to the kitchen and rocked him while I heated up his bottle and he became furious with me, almost barking like a dog when my hand would get near his face.
He settled a bit as he fed, but he would still sometimes suddenly spit out the bottle and attempt to bite me. I laid him back in his crib, this abomination in a clown sheet, and I walked down the hall to Mother's room letting out a long sigh.
Combing through my mother's journals in the early hours of the morning, it looked like she tried the ceremony again shortly after Thomas died, but she either lacked Ingrid’s help or didn't have enough of my father's ashes left. Something went terribly wrong. She was vaguer than she had been about Thomas’ conception, but I suspect she had used some of Thomas' remains. The resulting birth she named Isaac.
Mother's journals told a sad tale of her and Isaac's suffering. She never mentioned me, but lamented the loss of Thomas and Dad relentlessly. She was hyper protective of Isaac, as that was all she had left. If her world had been small before, it became microscopic after he entered her life, requiring nearly constant care. According to Mother, he was blind and colicky, sometimes going years at a time without sleeping through the night. She had breast fed him for years, but she had to stop after he grew teeth and began biting her intentionally and feeding on her blood.
I spent a lot of time over the next few days pondering what to do. I had to get her estate in order, she had left me the house, in an obvious attempt to get me to continue caretaking for Isaac, but I didn't want it. I had my own cozy home an hour away from here, filled with happy memories and my possessions acquired traveling the world. Mother's home had a heavy energy I couldn't shake. Her and Thomas were both gone, but the memories of the scoldings and beatings hung in every corner, like cobwebs that would never sweep away.
So, I fed Isaac and kept him clean and tried to keep him company, although he seemed to hate me passionately. I took care of him, all the while thinking about what I was going to do. After a week, I felt resolute in what had to be done.
Gathering up all of Mother's journals in a tote, I made my way to Isaac and picked him up and carried everything to the living room.
The ancient logs in the fireplace meant for display ignited instantly. One by one, I fed the journals into the fire, burning away years of my mother's consuming sorrow. Isaac fussed and moaned next to me the entire time. When the last pages shimmered away into lacy ash, I took a throw pillow off the couch and gently cradled Isaac in my other arm. It didn't take long before he stopped struggling and I felt his little body relax after decades of suffering.
I gently wrapped up a bundle in a clown sheet and placed it in the fire. It burned furiously, like the paper in my mother's journals, and was soon gone. Nothing but ashes and embers.
“Don't worry, Mother,” I said purely for my own sake, "I took care of Isaac for you."
And finally, I felt at peace.
2024.05.14 03:43 heydawn TODAY'S RECAP 5-13-2024
TODAY'S RECAP
Sheila loves that she got to spook Li and delights in anticipation of revealing herself to the Forresters. We see the aftermath of Steffy, Ridge, and Liam accepting the truth. Neither Finn or Deacon knows their partners as well as they think they do.Deacon and Sheila at Deacon's
Sheila: I'm glad I went to the hospital. Nothing was more fun than scaring the bejesus out of Li! 😄 (Sheila can't stop giggling). It couldn't have been more perfect -- Li being there. Hahaha!Deacon: She was furiously attacking you, tryna send you to the grave, for real.
Sheila: I know! It was so much fucking fun! More fun than I've had in a long time. 😆 Poor Li, she was just jealous that Finn couldn't let me stay dead and felt compelled to save me! Hahahaha. Li couldn't take it! (💭 Suck it, Li!)
I know. I know. People wish me dead all the damned time. IDGAF. I'm used to it! 😏
Deacon: This is going to keep happening if you keep popping up 👻 and surprising people. 😛 You're going to get a similar reaction to Li 🤯😡😤💥 Hey, how about trying subtle?
Sheila: Fuck that. I like to go BIG! 😆 I expect people to react like Li. I'm looking forward to it. 😏 I can't wait! Hahaha. 😂🤣
Who will be most shocked? Brooke 😫 or Ridge 😡? Oooh, I sooo wanna roll on up into Eric's place. 👏👏👏 Whoooey! Fun! 🎉 Donna is a screamer! 😮 (💭 These bitches will all freak out beautifully in a perfect combination of shock 😳, fear 🫣, loathing 😠, and disbelief 😦. Hahaha. Yay! 🤸♀️).
It was so perfect how Li was just there. How can I orchestrate my reveal to the Forresters for maximum shock? 😀 I can pop in at FC and be the model who walks in to see Ridge for alterations! Hahaha! HAAAA! 🤭
Deacon: Does "changed'" Sheila just wanna shock people? (💭 Sheila Sheila Sheila. Gotta try to control the crazy 😵💫).
Sheila: OMG! You're no FUN! It's just a little SHOCK 😱. Not HARM! 😏 (💭 I'm not going to chop up 🪓, hang or tie up ➰, stab 🔪, drown 🌊, or shoot 🔫 anybody. I'm not going to set anyone's house on fire🔥 or chain ⛓️ them up in a dungeon ⛓️! I'm not going to kidnap any babies or children 👦👶👧, or trick anyone into getting my face 🙂. I'm not going to break in to anyone's home 🏠! That was the old Sheila! No one will end up murdered, kidnapped, bloody🩸, or otherwise injured 🤕, ffs! Gah! Calm down! It's just a little mischief 🙄😏).
I just want to have a little fun 🥳. Come on! Nothing nefarious 👿. Just prankster fun 🤪😝!
Deacon: So remember the nice, chill, mellow, 😌 happy, calm, quiet life we discussed? (💭 Imagine being a stoner and our biggest stressor is getting the munchies 🍕🥪🍚🍪🍰🥯🍟🥨when we're out of snacks and our favorite places are closed.) No fantasies about scaring 👻 people and getting reactions from the Forresters. Let's get back to us, our engagement, and our nice, quiet life. (Deacon, Reddit wonders if you actually KNOW Sheila 🤔).
Sheila: Ppffrrtt. (💭 Alright, fine, we'll seeeeeee😏.)
(Sheila and Deacon laugh 😄😀 and smoochy smoochy kissy kissy 😍🥰. Then Sheila is snuggled up with Deacon getting a shoulder massage.)
Sheila: I missed this. 😍 I missed you and thought about you the whole time. I didn't think I'd be back here. I was thisclose to 💀.
But, here I am! With you and my imaginary ring. 👋💍 😀 WOW!
Deacon: 🙄 No more pretending. I want everyone to know how in love 😍💕 I am with you. 🥰 (More smoochy smoochy 😘🥰.)
Hope, Ridge, and Liam at FC
Ridge and Liam: Sheila! Changed? 🤨 Wha? 😦Nah. Nope. No. No fucking way! 😠 Is Finn crazy? 😵💫 Delusional? Stupid? Wtf is his problem? 😤Ridge: You must have gotten it wrong. It can't be.
Hope: No. Sheila is--
Ridge: NOOOOOOO! Grrrr. 😠 Gah! 😦 Not about SHEILA. I know. I KNOW. 🤨 I get it. I heard you. Sheila's alive. Fuck. But whatever. No. I mean about the other thing -- Finn idiotically thinking this is GOOD news. Growl! Huff! Puff! 😤On what planet could he POSSIBLY believe this is good news? How clueless is he?
Liam: (quickly hopping on the anti-Finn train 🚂) Yah. Yah. I mean, seriously. Hope. How could Finn POSSIBLY think,💡🤔 with NO ❌ evidence, that psychopath Sheila 👿 is reformed 😇? Wtf?!
Hope: He has reasons. He--
Ridge: REASONS!? REASONS?! 😮 Snarl! 😡 What fucking REASONS?!
Hope: He says she's changed. He's seen her growth. 🌱 He's seen her sprout angel 😇 wings 🪽. He's seen a new and improved Sheila.
Liam: Give me a fucking break! It's pure foolishness 🥴 and personal bias! 😦 Gah! Just because the BABY MANCHILD has a childish need to have a relationship with his birth mommy, he's latched onto a fantasy that this demon 👿 psycho has reformed. (💭 Don't worry, Steffy 💕. I'll be your fall back guy.).
It's NOT REALITY! (💭 I'm really postering now, showing off to Ridge, matching him huff for puff! 😤).
Ridge: Yah! Grrrr. Harumph! 😤😡 What's gotten into this guy? 🤨 Growl! 😦 Sheila is an ANIMAL! Grrr! 😦 Animals don't change! Snort! 😤 Spiders 🕷️, snakes⚕️, reptiles 🐊, monsters 🧟♀️👺👿 like Sheila never change!
Hope: I felt the same way. (💭 I even gave up on a relationship with my dad ☹️ when he wouldn't break it off with Sheila.) But after seeing 👀 them together 💕, maybe we should keep an open mind 😐.) People said the same thing about Thomas, that he--
Ridge: 🤨 You DID NOT. You DID NOT just FUCKING GO THERE (💭 bitch!) Growl! 😡 Snarl! 😦 Snort 😤! Grrrr. You DID NOT just COMPARE my TALENTED, KIND, LOVING, REFORMED SON (some Redditors say you forgot enabled, entitled, obsessed, dangerous, and consequence free son) to that PSYCHOPATH SHEILA?! OMFG! 🤬
Hope: I'm not saying they're the same. 🫤🙄 (💭 Gah. Eye roll. Patience with the neanderthal. Deep breath.) I'm just saying people can change. So we could just possibly, maybe open the door a teeny, tiny 🤏 bit and entertain the possibility that Finn could possibly be right.
Ridge: You AGREE with (💭 the loser idiot) FINN about that psycho 🫨 Sheila?! What the fucking fuck, Hope?! (💭 Are you crazy and stupid too? Where's Brooke? I can't deal with you, ffs.😠)
Look, Finn has a weird ass connection to Sheila. But WTF, Hope. What's up with YOU? 🤔
Liam: 🤨
Hope: I explained. Sugar was planning to harm 🪓➰🔪🩸 Steffy. Sheila tried to stop her.
Liam: Hearsay. This story of Sheila fighting Sugar came from the least reliable source -- Sheila! (💭 Reddit hates to admit it, but Liam has a point). Sheila told you this story. You, Finn, and Deacon just accept it at face value.
But all we know for sure is that SHEILA didn't attack 🔪 Steffy. Sugar did. That doesn't mean Sheila has changed. It just means there were TWO psychos! 😵💫🫨 (Reddit really doesn't want to give Liam credit but kinda gotta suck it up and admit, he's making good points.)
Hope: Deacon and Finn think she HAS changed.
Ridge: Hope. (💭 Whooo boy. I have no patience under normal circumstances. 😑 This is WILDLY FRUSTRATING AF! 😡). Everything Sheila says is a LIE! It's all for show. Gah! 😦 Come ON!
Hope: For--
Ridge and Liam: FOR FINN! FOR FINN! OMFG! 😨
Ridge: She's feeding him the fantasy HE WANTS! Now, she's supposed to be mother of the year, ffs?! Growl! Snarl! 😡 Nah!
Hope: I'm not saying we just accept it. I'm just asking that we keep an open mind, for Finn's sake. (💭 Reddit wonders why Hope doesn't just wrap it up and extricate herself from this whole thing! She should just say ' I gave you the news. Talk to Finn. Byeeee.' Reddit says get out of there, Hope. It's been a looooooooooooooong af day!)
Look, I'm starting to see Finn's side. If indeed Sheila has changed, why shouldn't he want a relationship with her?
Ridge: NOT gonna HAPPEN. 🤨 😡 (Reddit thinks Ridge must have taken a few pointers from Victor Newman only Ridge is way louder.) Finn wants Sheila in their lives. Steffy's not gonna allow it.🫸❌ Absolutely not. ❌ No way. ❌ No how. ❌ Never. Ever. Gonna happen. ❌ Nope. ❌ Nah! ❌ Forget about it! ❌
Liam: Ohhh. Yah! Righ! After what she's endured being MARRIED to this guy who has some bullshit, primal connection to his psycho 🫨 birth mother. Now he wants to invite Sheila into her life? Well, he doesn't GET STEFFY! Steffy will NEVER allow it. She'll draw a line ➖in the sand. The stop 🛑 sign will go up. The hands will push 🫸 back 🫸 hard 🫸.
FINN DOESN'T KNOW STEFFY -- like AT ALL! (💭 Not like I know Steffy and love 😍 Steffy, and will protect Steffy 👩❤️👨.)
Ridge: 🤨
Hope: 🙄
Finn and Steffy at their home
Steffy: (it all sinks in) It wasn't Sheila I stabbed 🔪. 😣 It was a look-a-like, Sugar. 😖 I stabbed a Sugar -- some woman who was tricked into plastic surgery to look like Sheila. What?! 🤯Finn: Yah, babe. Isn't that a good thing? 🙂 Isn't that GREAT? 😀 Isn't that a relief? 😀 Isn't that a HUGE weight lifted? 😃 Aren't you thrilled 🤩, happy 😁, and bursting with joy 😊? I know I am. We thought you killed my birth mother, but you stabbed a totally different psycho! Pretty cool, huh? 🙄😃
Steffy: 🥺😠😡 (💭 Wow. OMG. Finn thinks I should be relieved? WTF?!)
Sugar kidnapped ➰⛓️ Sheila. If Deacon and I hadn't gotten there to SAVE her, she might not have survived, honey! This is SUCH AMAZINGLY AWESOME 👍 NEWS!
Steffy: So YOU think I'm supposed to be THANKFUL this monster 👿 is alive?! Are you fucking serious?! 😖😟
Finn: Nah. But yah. Isn't a small 🤏 part of you thankful? 🙄
Steffy: No. 😕
Finn: Relieved? 😀
Steffy: No. ☹️
Finn: Happy for me? 🙂
Steffy: No. 😣
Finn: Honey, babe, sweetheart, listen. We were struggling with the fact that you killed my birth mother, but we don't have to anymore. (💭 I know if I reframe this the right way, Steffy will have an ah ha 💡moment 😀 and feel relief. I just have to find the right words. I have faith 🙏 in us. I'm not even a little bit delusional.🥴 I know Steffy has a good and forgiving heart ❤️. She's just in shock 😳 and horrified 😱 and her mind is blown 🤯. But this will subside. 🙂 I'll just keep talking in a soothing voice. Yah!)
You killed someone who hated Sheila. Sugar was crazy. She wanted to hurt YOU to hurt HER. Get it? (💭 Sugar was the REALLY bad 👹 one. Sheila is a RECOVERING psycho! Big difference! 😀)
Steffy: So I'm supposed to be ooooh all happy and shit that psycho A is dead and psycho B is alive? 🤔 Nah! Finn, I'ma speak slowly so you can understand me when I tell you, NO I'm not happy or relieved or whatever tf you want me to be -- because the DANGER IS BACK! (💭 This man has the THICKEST, HARDEST HEAD! Fucking hell. He's freaking me out so badly that Dawn can't even find any emojis to express the emotional wreckage on my face! Anger, disbelief, confusion, fear, stress, anxiety, frustration -- all the feels!)
Finn: Nah. It's not back! That's the glorious, wonderful, amazing, beautiful, exciting, magnificent 😀😃😄😁 thing I'm just not adequately conveying to you, my love! No fear or danger! Sheila tried to PROTECT YOU. She tried to SAVE YOUR LIFE! She's your best friend ever! She wants to get pedicures together, not shoot us and leave us for dead! She's past that nonsense now. No more danger, honey! ☺️💕
She offered her own life to save you! She tried to fight Sugar. She loves us!
Steffy: Look. 🤨 Sugar's scheme was to blame Sheila. So, Sheila was just selfishly protecting HERSELF from getting blamed. That's all it was! (💭 If I just reframe this the right way, Finn will have an ah ha 💡 moment. He has to! I just have to find the right words to get through his thick skull and penetrate his delusional thinking. He's really worrying me and pissing me off. Wow. Just wow.)
Finn: Nah. She offered her own life! She cares more about us than her own life. SHEILA'S A HERO! Super Sheila🦸♀️ to the rescue, only she was chained up ⛓️ and fighting at a disadvantage, but she tried!
Steffy: Hero? HERO? 🤢🤮 You're calling SHEILA fucking psycho CARTER a HERO? Are you on crack? 😮 She tried to KILL🩸us. (💭 He's gone off the deep end into LA LA land 🤪.)
Finn: When Sugar told her--
Steffy: (Angry 😡 and frustrated 😖, Steffy Slams a chair 🪑💥 hard on the floor.) I DON'T GIVE AF ABOUT SUGAR!!! I don't CARE her!!! 😦😣 She means NOTHING TO ME!!! (💭 STFU Finn! OMFG! Ahhhh! I have NO PATIENCE LEFT for his delusional BULLSHIT! I can't seem to get through to him! Why tf won't he LISTEN??!! 🤬)
WE'RE TALKING ABOUT SHEILA! 😠
S H E I L A !! 😡
We've been over this a ZILLION TIMES how she had terrorized my family for generations! How do you not GET IT?
Finn: I do. I underst--
Steffy: NO YOU DO NOT FUCKING UNDERSTAND!!!! 😡😤 GENERATIONS! GENERATIONS! That vile bitch is a LUNATIC! 😵💫🫨😈
(Steffy pleads 😫 with Finn in frustration 😖😣 to comprehend.)
She tried to KILL ME! And my MOTHER! And my GRANDMOTHER! 😩
I lost TIME with my mother! 😩 I lost TIME with YOU! 😫😣
She's tried to POISON people. So, even if she did try some feeble attempt to get that other stupid psychopath friend not to hurt me, SO FUCKING WHAT?!
NO! NO! NO NO NO NO! 😡 She's NO HERO! I NEVER want to hear you say that AGAIN! (💭 La La La La I can't hear you! I won't hear you! NO!)
Finn: 😑😞 (shakes his head. 💭 She's not getting it.)
Steffy: 😡😖 (shakes her head. 💭 He's lost his mind.)
Steffy: Do you hear me? She's vile. She is in no way a HERO! 😠 She left us in an ALLEY to DIE! What are you thinking? 😩
Finn: Yah yah. I knoooow. I know her past sins. She's made some mistakes 😒, some bad judgement calls🙄, she's been kind of a mess 🫤. She hasn't always put her best foot forward. She hasn't always been super thoughtful. Sure, she's wanted a lot of people dead 💀, but that was THEN and this is NOW! She's been working on herself. She's very into self help these days, and yoga and shit. The fact is she tried to save you!
Steffy: Don't CHALLENGE ME on FACTS ABOUT SHEILA! I'll give YOU the fucking FACTS Mr. Man! 😡 You will lose.
Finn: How about the handy dandy fact that she's alive and you didn't kill my birth mother? ☺️ That matters to me! I'm your husband (takes Steffy's hand). You're the most important person 💕 in the world 🌎 to me. But my birth mother was a mystery. I almost lost her. I just want to help her. I don't want to turn my back on her. 😟 (💭 She's kind of a hoot too, and stubborn and strong, kinda like someone else I love! ❤️)
Steffy: (looking miserable 😖) But you have to. I love you. 😢God, I love you! ❤️ (💭 And my heart is breaking 💔 right now.) You are SO GOOD! But Sheila is EVIL 👹. You are naive (💭 delusional) to think she'll change, that she won't devestate our lives.
Sheila is NOT going to be IN OUR LIVES, no where near Kelly or Hayes.
You can't have BOTH. 😟
It's either HER.
Or ME. 😐
Finn: 😕I hear you. Of COURSE it's YOU. It will always be you. ❤️ (Steffy and Finn share an emotional embrace, both with weary 😞, teary 😥, worried 🥺 expressions. They hold on to each other, emotionally spent.)
The end.
2024.05.14 03:40 -BeefTallow- 80lbs lost!
Hello everyone, I rarely post here since I usually agree with the general consensus for weight loss and advice shared in this sub, and feel like I don’t usually have anything additional to input, but idk why I just want to share my progress now at the 80 pound mark. I started my weight loss journey back in August when I quit drinking alcohol. I was a daily drinker since I was 23 or so, and turned 32 in August, I felt like alcohol was controlled my daily life and my habits. Plus I loved craft beer and that whole lifestyle was one of the key factors in me ballooning up to 362 lbs. I’m a 6’5” male, and I started to look like a sumo wrestler. I have two little kids and a beautiful wife and I just felt like I was dragging them down with my weight. Doing activities was really hard, the stress on my body and cardiovascular system just really limited what I could do with them. I said enough was enough. In my mind I was like “I’m only 32, I still have some of the best years of my life left to be at my physical peak and prime, yet here I am looking like I need a scooter to get around Disneyland.” So I quit drinking started back at my local big box gym, lifting weights mostly and occasionally doing cardio. I downloaded my fitness pal, calculated my tdee and bought a new scale. I was usually in a 1000 calorie deficit while prioritizing protein but not limiting carbs or any food groups. During holidays, eating out, and other events I’d still track but just estimated my calories for the foods using my best guess. I lost the first half of my weight in probably the first couple months, but it’s slowed a bit, which is totally fine. I haven’t really adjusted my calories because as long as I’m still losing, I don’t see the need. My goal is to eventually get to the 250s and then maybe even 230s, but I’m in no hurry. I love my new body, everything is better in a smaller size. I can walk around stores without feeling a sense of dread if I see stairs or other physically demanding obstacles. I look good in pictures again, and my wife is very happy in bed if you know what I mean. All in all, I feel like I lost the weight in the most sustainable way compared to other times in my life. Not eliminating food groups and tracking calories with a food scale is like a cheat code, I rarely feel hungry or like I’m being restricted. CICO really is all that it boils down to!
submitted by -BeefTallow- to loseit [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 03:39 SensitiveSelf4102 Prolonged Issues after Surgery
34M Australia - 25/11/24 I had the following procedures (private):
I had appointments with my specialist on 24/02/23 and 06/03/23 to discuss my concerns. After having a physical examination on both occasions, I was told everything was fine. My specialist mentioned that there were surgical staples that were still in place, but that they would come out on their own over time.
As the months went on, I was still experiencing the issues previously mentioned. I went back a third time on 03/10/23 for a follow-up. During the examination, the specialist said that the staples were still there and decided to remove them.
I thought this would be the end of my problems, but the bleeding and pain still continued. It seemed like my wounds were not healing properly. I had another appointment on 14/11/23 and was recommended Botox as a solution. I agreed to go ahead because I was starting to get a little desperate at this point. The specialist said he could do it cost price. All I needed to do was purchase the Botox from one of his associates (GP) cosmetic clinic. I'm not too sure if this is a red flag or not.
I scheduled an appointment for 01/12/23 and was instructed to collect the Botox beforehand and bring it with me to the specialist clinic in an Esky (portable cooler). The procedure itself was quick, and I was looking forward to finally getting some relief.
As the weeks went by, I started to get some complications, including difficulty emptying my bowels, fecal urgency, pain that would last hours, and a buildup of pressure. It felt like I had a golf ball inside of me, and my muscles were trying to squeeze it out. At this point, it was Christmas time, and my specialist wouldn't be available until February 2024.
I went back to my specialist on 09/02/24 to explain my complications. After a physical examination, the specialist said that they couldn't find any issues and that everything had healed properly. They seemed perplexed as to why I had any concern about what was going on. After further discussion, they suggested that I probably have Levator Ani Syndrome and wrote me a referral to a physical therapist for pelvic floor therapy. I was a little dubious, as the symptoms I was experiencing started after I received the Botox injections, and I had never had these issues before. The pain I had experienced was due to the bleeding and reopening of my wounds.
Since then, the only contact I've had with my specialist is via email. Getting an appointment can take up to three months and past visits have mostly been essentially a waste of time. At this point, I was still having issues with bleeding, so my specialist requested that I keep a diary of when it occurs and take pictures as evidence. On 28/03/24 I had a pretty bad bleed, so I took a picture and emailed the specialist. They responded pretty quickly and remarked that this was unusual. They recommended making another appointment if this continued.
After this email exchange, I went ahead and booked a consultation for pelvic floor therapy. The physical therapist said that it will take up to six months to regain proper function again. Presently, my pain comes and goes. Some days are better than others. I emailed my specialist yesterday (13/05/24) with an update on my condition and the current symptoms I was having:
I won't be going back to this specialist, but I need to get to the bottom of how this all even happened and who is at fault. Is it bad luck, or is this a result of poor care from my specialist? I've made a booking for a comprehensive examination of my pelvic floor at another clinic. Hopefully, this will shed some light on what my symptoms are and a way to move forward.
submitted by SensitiveSelf4102 to AskDocs [link] [comments]
- Colonoscopy (Sessile serrated polyps found during colonoscopy in 2021)
- Sphincterotomy
- Removal of third of forth degree hemorrhoids
I had appointments with my specialist on 24/02/23 and 06/03/23 to discuss my concerns. After having a physical examination on both occasions, I was told everything was fine. My specialist mentioned that there were surgical staples that were still in place, but that they would come out on their own over time.
As the months went on, I was still experiencing the issues previously mentioned. I went back a third time on 03/10/23 for a follow-up. During the examination, the specialist said that the staples were still there and decided to remove them.
I thought this would be the end of my problems, but the bleeding and pain still continued. It seemed like my wounds were not healing properly. I had another appointment on 14/11/23 and was recommended Botox as a solution. I agreed to go ahead because I was starting to get a little desperate at this point. The specialist said he could do it cost price. All I needed to do was purchase the Botox from one of his associates (GP) cosmetic clinic. I'm not too sure if this is a red flag or not.
I scheduled an appointment for 01/12/23 and was instructed to collect the Botox beforehand and bring it with me to the specialist clinic in an Esky (portable cooler). The procedure itself was quick, and I was looking forward to finally getting some relief.
As the weeks went by, I started to get some complications, including difficulty emptying my bowels, fecal urgency, pain that would last hours, and a buildup of pressure. It felt like I had a golf ball inside of me, and my muscles were trying to squeeze it out. At this point, it was Christmas time, and my specialist wouldn't be available until February 2024.
I went back to my specialist on 09/02/24 to explain my complications. After a physical examination, the specialist said that they couldn't find any issues and that everything had healed properly. They seemed perplexed as to why I had any concern about what was going on. After further discussion, they suggested that I probably have Levator Ani Syndrome and wrote me a referral to a physical therapist for pelvic floor therapy. I was a little dubious, as the symptoms I was experiencing started after I received the Botox injections, and I had never had these issues before. The pain I had experienced was due to the bleeding and reopening of my wounds.
Since then, the only contact I've had with my specialist is via email. Getting an appointment can take up to three months and past visits have mostly been essentially a waste of time. At this point, I was still having issues with bleeding, so my specialist requested that I keep a diary of when it occurs and take pictures as evidence. On 28/03/24 I had a pretty bad bleed, so I took a picture and emailed the specialist. They responded pretty quickly and remarked that this was unusual. They recommended making another appointment if this continued.
After this email exchange, I went ahead and booked a consultation for pelvic floor therapy. The physical therapist said that it will take up to six months to regain proper function again. Presently, my pain comes and goes. Some days are better than others. I emailed my specialist yesterday (13/05/24) with an update on my condition and the current symptoms I was having:
- Bleeding every few weeks, most recently on 11/05/24. It always seems to be in the same area. Roughly 1 inch inside at 12:00.
- Difficulty completely emptying bowels.
- Loss of muscle function in pelvic floor.
- Regular discharge of mucus.
- Irritation and pressure built up in the lower rectum.
- Persistent chronic pain.
I won't be going back to this specialist, but I need to get to the bottom of how this all even happened and who is at fault. Is it bad luck, or is this a result of poor care from my specialist? I've made a booking for a comprehensive examination of my pelvic floor at another clinic. Hopefully, this will shed some light on what my symptoms are and a way to move forward.
2024.05.14 03:38 Electrical-Ad-2922 I think my future MIL hates me - what do I do?
So for context -my partner and I have been dating for half a decade. Our relationship is strong and we are enjoying our time together immensely - he's the love of my life, my favourite laughing partner and just a really special human being I'm honoured to know so deeply. My MIL came accross as a strong personality but seemed delightful and embraced me at first. Over the last few years it has become suspected she has a personality disorder with her "incidents" and behaviour. My partner and I are planning on getting engaged this year and have had this timeline for a very long time. While this should be a very exciting time in my life - I am instead feeling worried, stressed, and down. This MIL is constantly bringing up the concepts of engagement, weddings, and babies at get-togethers which sure is fine but the thing is it feels like she makes an effort to leave me out of it. My partners brother is also proposing this year to his partner which have been dating a few years less than us (super happy for them). My partner also has another sibling that isn't planning on proposing anytime soon and is younger. I have a really good relationship with everyone else in the family including the father (says i'm like a daughter), the siblings, and the partners (we have become friends). My MIL is not only making the maintenance of these relationships hard, but she is making me feel like abolute crap on a consistent basis at family events with how she blatenly treats me poorly compared to others. Here's some examples:
Some of these things above I have cried, laughed, or both about. There are many more things she has done that have hurt me these past few years of our relationship which I haven't mentioned above by myself and my partner thought were unintentional at the time and not necesary to address. She has love bombed me before which has confused me and made me think i'm over reacting to feeling like she wasn't treating me well/ doesn't like me -but most recently its gotten to the point where I am crying when I get home from every family event because of how prominent her efforts to exclude and bellttle me are.
Me and my partner have great communication and have agreed on the implementation of boundaries such as increased distance if her behaviour progresses etc. and he has offered to say something but I am scared. No matter what, I will have to attend family get to-gethers and I am marrying into this family that I really do love. I get along with the siblings partners so well it's such a shame that her presence leads to her making me feel poorly around them because of how she acts/things she says. I have also suggested she gets more mental support but right now shes attending therapy alone where I don't think she is fully honesst about her incidents/treatment of others. My partner knows she is unwell and we are both upset and tired of this being a thing. I definitely don't want to be overly embraced and put on a pedestal but I think what shes doing currently takes more effort than just acknowledging me and treating me with an ounce of the kindness she gives the others. I am scared to get engaged after her reaction to hearing we have been ring shopping and I am also more scared about the concept of a wedding or having kids as I find she has a tendency to be controlling and I don't want my future kids to see their mom being treated like this or possibly be treated the same. That of course made my partner upset and now don't know where to go from here (hence me referring to reddit) but I know a life with this is not a happy one for me or my partner and I don't deserve it but I love the family and I do love her for who she may be when shes mentally more well and her perseverence in life.
submitted by Electrical-Ad-2922 to JUSTNOMIL [link] [comments]
- At family events the MIL will bring up the topic of marriage, babies, moving in, etc. talk about it happening for both other siblings and then completely disregard me and my partner. For instance recently she went on about who shes inviting to the one siblings wedding and then talked about how the other sibling (one not proposing anytime soon)'s would be and then (I kid you not) looked at me, said my partner and I's names and laughed.
- Im telling you at every.single. event. for the past 3 years from the first few months of them dating she is bringing up the other siblings future engagement and how they deserve it so much etc. Cute at first but its very very excessive at this point (and thats me underexagerating). Im talking about begging, and not letting the topic go when no one in the room is reciprocating. Not a peep has been heard about me and my partner in this half a decade of being in the family. - Would I every want it to the extent of the other sibling? no. Do i find it odd and a bit rude? Yes. especially considering the fact that she has known my partner is proposing this year.
- one day she brought down her mothers gold jewlery and was passing it to the other siblings partners and asking what type of ring she wants. Then when that sibling's partner asked me (attempting to include me in the conversation) and I showed pictures of the the ones I tried on and the MIL immediatly went quiet then interrupted and changed the conversation back to the other siblings partner. She acted like I wasn't there and afterwards the other siblings partner said they noticed too.
- when leaving a get together she went out of her way to hug every partner but me.
- After not saying a word to me in a room she calls over other siblings partners and has private conversations in the other conjoining room about non-private things.
- (this is wild that im even saying this) I noticed she covers our picture on the mantel up by either putting other siblings and their partners photos in front or a nick nack like a bible verse plaque.
- I have tried doing activities she enjoys with her -making an effort to let her know I care about her and her interests. - a lot out of my comfort zone.
- One of my love languages is gifts/acts of service (I don't expect it in return but I would think she would atleast treat me kindly) - I hand-made the whole family including partners sweaters (while other partners go nothing), every year I make the family yearly recap videos, I also make every family member including her birthday videos where I spend hours collecting photos, and videos from the past with their favourite music - started as something just for my partner but my FIL was so appreciative of it I thought i would do it for everyone. I do something special for her for international womens day and mothers day every year.
- I thank her in cards and have told her many times for raising very kind respectable humans.
- I ask her questions/ listen to her vents about conflicts with friends or family - (which btw she can be very negative about people).
- Myself and my partner both do the most activities with her and go out of our way to visit/help her the most. (ie. going shopping together, visiting her at work)
- I have cleaned her whole kitchen/ made food for the family on my own dime and time.
- Even when we first started dating and I was a broke university student - I would go out of my way to spend money on her and her family because i wanted to and I love them.
- When she would have mental "incidents" ie. leaving the house for a few days, calling family members really horrible names etc. I was the one who would speak sense to my partner and his siblings about how this is a mental health issue and she doesn't really mean it. - I have defended her at her worst.
- invited her to two outings/events things we have done together before - denied
- Asking her about life/work - not holding conversation
- Used to hug me good morning/goodbye - not anymore.
- Blatantly ignoring my prescence in the room when other siblings partners are there/not including me in conversation
- didn't respond to my mothers text and makes very little effort with my family (despite my family having them to our cottage and visiting/checking in - my dad and the FIL are friends) - meanwhile when we are in big groups she is constantly talkig about the other siblings partners parents and going out of her way to invite them to fancy dinners - buy them the most expensive bottle of wine etc. (bc she "wants to make a good impression"). - lol i guess my family wasn't important these past 5 years.
Some of these things above I have cried, laughed, or both about. There are many more things she has done that have hurt me these past few years of our relationship which I haven't mentioned above by myself and my partner thought were unintentional at the time and not necesary to address. She has love bombed me before which has confused me and made me think i'm over reacting to feeling like she wasn't treating me well/ doesn't like me -but most recently its gotten to the point where I am crying when I get home from every family event because of how prominent her efforts to exclude and bellttle me are.
Me and my partner have great communication and have agreed on the implementation of boundaries such as increased distance if her behaviour progresses etc. and he has offered to say something but I am scared. No matter what, I will have to attend family get to-gethers and I am marrying into this family that I really do love. I get along with the siblings partners so well it's such a shame that her presence leads to her making me feel poorly around them because of how she acts/things she says. I have also suggested she gets more mental support but right now shes attending therapy alone where I don't think she is fully honesst about her incidents/treatment of others. My partner knows she is unwell and we are both upset and tired of this being a thing. I definitely don't want to be overly embraced and put on a pedestal but I think what shes doing currently takes more effort than just acknowledging me and treating me with an ounce of the kindness she gives the others. I am scared to get engaged after her reaction to hearing we have been ring shopping and I am also more scared about the concept of a wedding or having kids as I find she has a tendency to be controlling and I don't want my future kids to see their mom being treated like this or possibly be treated the same. That of course made my partner upset and now don't know where to go from here (hence me referring to reddit) but I know a life with this is not a happy one for me or my partner and I don't deserve it but I love the family and I do love her for who she may be when shes mentally more well and her perseverence in life.
2024.05.14 03:35 Eric-who One year after 2mph fender bender, guy claiming tons of bodily injury
Long story short, 11 months ago my gf was on the freeway in stop and go traffic, accidentally tapped someones rear bumper going maybe 2 mph, they both pulled over, exchanged info (his insurance he gave her was expired and he was being super sketchy the whole time, not wanting to give her any info) she took pictures of both cars and video on the side of the road showing absolutely no damage to either car, guy was even up and walking fine in the video, and they went their separate ways.
Fast forward to today when my gf gets a call and email from her insurance that they guy is seeking $25k compensation for bodily injury sustained during this, and i quote, "rear end accident with great force", apparently he has been going to a doctor and chiropractor for neck, shoulder, low back pain, headaches etc etc you name it, even has an MRI of his low back showing big disc bulges (I work as an xray tech for an orthopedic surgeons office and the findings on this MRI were definitely not caused by a 2mph accident), he got epidural injections, the whole nine. Also claiming he was unable to work due to the pain, typcial stuff that a fraud will try to claim.
Her insurance company is saying they are accepting liabilty and are wanting her to sign a declaration. Is there anything she can do? Is it worth it to fight this guy over $25k or should she just accept that her insurance is accepting liabilty, take the increase in her premiums and go on with her life?
submitted by Eric-who to legaladvice [link] [comments]
Fast forward to today when my gf gets a call and email from her insurance that they guy is seeking $25k compensation for bodily injury sustained during this, and i quote, "rear end accident with great force", apparently he has been going to a doctor and chiropractor for neck, shoulder, low back pain, headaches etc etc you name it, even has an MRI of his low back showing big disc bulges (I work as an xray tech for an orthopedic surgeons office and the findings on this MRI were definitely not caused by a 2mph accident), he got epidural injections, the whole nine. Also claiming he was unable to work due to the pain, typcial stuff that a fraud will try to claim.
Her insurance company is saying they are accepting liabilty and are wanting her to sign a declaration. Is there anything she can do? Is it worth it to fight this guy over $25k or should she just accept that her insurance is accepting liabilty, take the increase in her premiums and go on with her life?
2024.05.14 03:33 dudetteG Anyone else conjure up something screwed up in your sleep? This is from almost 5 years ago, I was told it was f***ed up. Wrote it all down as soon as I woke up
It started with me not really being me, and my family and friends being people I don't actually know. I was up at late hours, as usual. My friend was in my bedroom sleeping. I felt off, like there was something lurking around. Then I see it. This giant mass of dark colours, a scary face with teeth, and long arms that could stretch and also work as deadly claws. He was there for my friend. He comes for you while you sleep. He somehow made me believe that it is a painless way to go, and made me okay with him taking my friend. There was a darker motive though. When he tried to go into the bedroom, my parents woke up. My father asked why I was awake still, and I just shrugged my shoulders without really knowing what to say about the creature I just saw. Even then, he would have thought I was hallucinating from lack of sleep. The sound of my parents waking up, woke up my friend. She started playing loud music, and somehow knew about what was happening. Then I got a phone call. "Don't let them take you or anyone out the window. They will cut you until it feels like fire, and make you wish you were dead. Trust me." "They?", I thought. Thats when he went back to sneaking into the bedroom, and just as I was about to intervene, something grabs me, and pulls me back. Slicing into my sides, I started screaming. Was this what the girl over the phone was talking about? The giant creature pulls my friend out the window, and thats when I get released and whoever was holding me darts out the window to go with them. My parents came out of their bedroom once again because of all the screaming. I'm hysterical, crying, bleeding, and in a lot of pain. They ask me whats going on, almost in a yelling tone, and thats when I spill about everything I saw, what he said to me, and the phone call. My mother looks skeptical. My father looks like he believes me, but wishes he couldn't. This is when he decides we're all going to get my friend back. Me, my mother, my father and my younger brother. We leave the house and head in the direction they launched out the window. After a lot of walking, we come across a town that seems like it shouldn't exist. Its small, but filled with life, and kids, and a fun feeling. My father makes us pick up the pace. "We're being followed." He says in a hushed tone. Thats when I see it. Its a girl, in a pale hoodie and jeans, with bandages over half of her face, and the hood over her head. She could pass for my friend, but very clearly isn't. Her body language was too different, and why would she follow us instead of running to us. We lose her in the alleys, but then decide to make the mistake of cutting her off in the street. We ask her what she wants, she doesn't reply, but makes a few steps closer. Suddenly the town that was so filled with life, and the sun, and colour, spins under us. Everything is red, there's screaming, dead bodies laying and hanging everywhere in the streets. The girl that looked like my friend, starts running. She disappeared around a corner. Once we turned the same corner, there was a gate. It looked like it could fall any second, or like there was a lot of patch work done to it. We go through, and that's when the testing began. At first it was just running away from different beasts, or people who had gone insane from being here for so long. Then there were two actual trials. We had to crawl up into these vents, while they were on. It wasn't too hot or too cold, but there was enough air flowing to make us slip, a lot. All four of us held hands. The openings in the bottom would pop open randomly, in attempt to lose one of us. My mother was first in line, and I almost lost her during one of the vents popping open. In the very bottom of each opening it was different. A different way to die each time, and none of them quick. Her hand slipped from mine, but I had caught her just in time. If it weren't for my father holding my hand, I would've fallen through with her. We continued on, and we eventually make it to the end. At the end there was this pipe that went downhill. There was running water all through it, so we could easily slide down. There was nowhere else to go, it was our next test. Still holding hands, we jumped in. It seemed easy enough. Other than the random spikes, or deformed monsters coming out of the water and trying to kill us, we were pulling through just fine. Then, that's when we all heard him. Mid-slide, his voice echoes. "The young one must eat to keep his energy up." That put all of us on edge. My little brother had to eat little fruits out of the water. That was the actual test. So many thoughts ran through my head, but the one that was the loudest was a worry of him getting poisoned. But, he is naive. He just grabbed one and ate it. He is too young to have such worries. After that, we had to walk through a hallway, almost office like. The rooms you could see into, since the walls were just windows. Once we looked ahead again, at the end of the hall, was him. He was standing there, so still that we didn't notice him the first time. In the room next to him, we could see her. My friend was on her knees, blindfolded. I ran to her, and the creature just let me pass. I removed the blindfold from her face, and when she saw me, she gripped me so tightly into a hug.
submitted by dudetteG to Dreams [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 03:33 TaskSilly1477 My son’s diagnosis + my teenager is leaving (alone).
Title explanation: Kaden kicked Kyson in the left knee. He went to urgent care and there is no break it is just a bone bruise. it will take 4-6 weeks to heal 90%. The doctor also confirmed that Kyson has osgood schlatter disease. Lilia will be leaving on her 8th grade trip to Washington DC in 2 weeks.
They are playing hooky today from school. They are headed to urgent care. There is just something in the stars. Their family has just been going through the wringer. Between Mango, Lilia with her hives and now Kyson with his knee. Jess threw her back out when she was painting. (i never realized before how chopped up her videos are with the editing. She is all over the place and she doesn’t finish a sentence before moving on to the next thought.) She has a back injury that she has had for a long time that showed up in her prenuvo scan. She has a bulging disc in her back. It always hurts but Jess painted and now it is excruciating. Yesterday Kyson was playing on the trampoline and Kaden accidentally kicked Kyson’s knee. Kyson is a competitive soccer player. His left knee has been injured in the past. Jess showed a video of a kid kicking Kyson’s knee in one of her tiktoks. His left knee keeps getting more and more injured and they are pretty sure he has osgood schlatter disease. This disease is a common thing to have when you are a competitive soccer player and growing. It is basically that you are growing too fast and your ligaments can't keep up. It is something Kyson will grow out of. Kyson does have ongoing knee pain. Last night the same knee got kicked. His knee immediately puffed up and is so swollen. Jess has never seen a knee this swollen. They are headed to urgent care.
Kyson’s ligaments seem fine. The doctor was amazing and super incredible. The doctor confirmed that Kyson does have osgood schlatter disease. The disease is the reason for the knee pain. The doctor got opinions from sports medicine doctors. Kyson got an x-ray done. The doctor will call if anything comes up on the x-ray. It is a contusion which is a bone bruise. That is why the knee is swollen. The doctor said it will take 4-6 weeks to heal 90%. 90-100% is a bit more difficult to heal from that point. The doctor does not recommend that Kyson play in his last game but to let pain be the guide. The only downside to playing the game is that it will reset the healing clock. If Kyson is not hurting they can consider it but if he is hurting then don’t try it. Mimi is hearing if you need to play the last game play it and then don’t do x y and z for 4-6 weeks. Jess didn’t ask about practice. Jess will ask about practices when the doctor calls about the results. (I bet you that they will make Kyson do practice and play the game then do 4-6 weeks of healing.) They will see what the x-ray says but the doctor doesn't think that it is a break. They said in 10-14 days if it gets worse to reach out and they will get Kyson physical therapy through sports medicine. The doctor said that the sports medicine doctors at the facility care for the kings players.
They are having much needed one on one time with the kids. The rest of the kids are still in school. Jess is making Kyson’s favorite chicken and rice.
Jess is picking Lilia up from school a little bit late. Lilia had a meeting after school. Lilia is going on her 8th grade trip to Washington DC in 2 weeks. 2 weeks is how long there is left of school. Jess didn’t realize how soon that was coming. The day of Lilia’s last day of school she leaves with her classmates and teachers to go to Washington DC. There is a student meeting today and a parent meeting next week. Jess has a checklist of things to get Lilia. Lilia needs a certain debit card to use while she is away. It is stressful. Lilia has traveled alone twice; however, it was just to disneyland. There were two times when she flew alone. Tommy and Caden have also flown alone. Lilia has never flown alone this far. They live in California and Washington DC is across the country. Jess is nervous but excited for Lilia. Lilia is excited that she is going with her friends. Sending Lilia across the nation is stressful. Jess has so much to do today. Urgent care really set back her day. Jess has so many things she needs to accomplish. Mothers day is in a few days and Jess has so many things in store even though she is a mother and should be chilling. Jess wants to have a barbeque and make it cute. Jess wants it pink themed and wants to set it up before mothers day. It will be gorgeous weather and hot on mothers day. They are going to have their first pool day of the season. Jess is excited for it and here for the beautiful weather. Jess has to get ready for that. Jess also needs to post a video today. She has been back on her youtube schedule for the most part. Now that Jess is on 3 platforms full time it is harder to stick to her every other day posting schedule. On tiktok she tries to post every day or every other day. That is also a fulltime job like youtube. Jess essentially has 2 full time jobs. Jess also posts it all to instagram. Jess tries to stick to her every other day schedule and has been doing pretty good. If not every other day, she tries to do it every 3 days. She is also posting on a platform every day. Jess is trying to make youtube more regular and more consistent. She has been doing all right every 2-3 days.
Lilia can only bring 1 small suitcase and a carryon backpack. They can't bring any liquids. They are also going to New york. On the first day they are going to get right off the plane and straight to doing things after their red eye flight. They can only use their phones for photos and no social media. They do have to bring a phone. They are not allowed to go to the last day of school. They are to stay home that day and pack. Jess is scared and doesn’t want Lilia to go without her. Jess wants constant updates. Lilia doesn’t know if she is allowed to send Jess pictures. They are allowed to use their phones to take pictures and contact your chaperone. They can only contact their parents if it is necessary. Jess at least wants Lilia to text at the end of the night. They are going to see outsiders the musical. Lilia is going to take a lot of photos because that is her only excuse to be on her phone.
Jess dropped Lilia off and is picking up Addie to go to cheer. It is a jump class. There are fly classes, jump classes and tumbling classes. Today is a jump class. Addie has not done this class yet. Jess has been living in the tesla today. There was a hit and run on their property. Someone took out their mailbox yesterday. They got it on camera. They couldn’t see the actual act of it but they could tell which car hit their mailbox and wiped it out completely. The car didn’t say anything and just kept right on going. It took out their side view mirror. That was a little scary.
Addie loved the class. It was Addie’s first time doing the class. It is crazy to Jess watching her child fall in love with something on her own. Cheer is Addies’ own passion. Addie was a dancer for the last few years and she did like it but didn’t love it. Addie is loving her new sport. The same thing happened with the boys and soccer. Jess doesn’t know anything about soccer and the boys absolutely love it. (Maybe the reason why her kids love doing sports that Jess has no experience with is because they are tired of Jess comparing their accomplishments to hers.) Jess loves watching her kids fall in love with things they want to do. Kyson’s doctor called back and confirmed that there are no breaks and that he does have osgood schlatter’s disease. Jess learned that there are alot of people that have this disease. Most of the time it is something that is grown out of. It is a disease that happens in young athletes.
submitted by TaskSilly1477 to jesssfam_snark [link] [comments]
They are playing hooky today from school. They are headed to urgent care. There is just something in the stars. Their family has just been going through the wringer. Between Mango, Lilia with her hives and now Kyson with his knee. Jess threw her back out when she was painting. (i never realized before how chopped up her videos are with the editing. She is all over the place and she doesn’t finish a sentence before moving on to the next thought.) She has a back injury that she has had for a long time that showed up in her prenuvo scan. She has a bulging disc in her back. It always hurts but Jess painted and now it is excruciating. Yesterday Kyson was playing on the trampoline and Kaden accidentally kicked Kyson’s knee. Kyson is a competitive soccer player. His left knee has been injured in the past. Jess showed a video of a kid kicking Kyson’s knee in one of her tiktoks. His left knee keeps getting more and more injured and they are pretty sure he has osgood schlatter disease. This disease is a common thing to have when you are a competitive soccer player and growing. It is basically that you are growing too fast and your ligaments can't keep up. It is something Kyson will grow out of. Kyson does have ongoing knee pain. Last night the same knee got kicked. His knee immediately puffed up and is so swollen. Jess has never seen a knee this swollen. They are headed to urgent care.
Kyson’s ligaments seem fine. The doctor was amazing and super incredible. The doctor confirmed that Kyson does have osgood schlatter disease. The disease is the reason for the knee pain. The doctor got opinions from sports medicine doctors. Kyson got an x-ray done. The doctor will call if anything comes up on the x-ray. It is a contusion which is a bone bruise. That is why the knee is swollen. The doctor said it will take 4-6 weeks to heal 90%. 90-100% is a bit more difficult to heal from that point. The doctor does not recommend that Kyson play in his last game but to let pain be the guide. The only downside to playing the game is that it will reset the healing clock. If Kyson is not hurting they can consider it but if he is hurting then don’t try it. Mimi is hearing if you need to play the last game play it and then don’t do x y and z for 4-6 weeks. Jess didn’t ask about practice. Jess will ask about practices when the doctor calls about the results. (I bet you that they will make Kyson do practice and play the game then do 4-6 weeks of healing.) They will see what the x-ray says but the doctor doesn't think that it is a break. They said in 10-14 days if it gets worse to reach out and they will get Kyson physical therapy through sports medicine. The doctor said that the sports medicine doctors at the facility care for the kings players.
They are having much needed one on one time with the kids. The rest of the kids are still in school. Jess is making Kyson’s favorite chicken and rice.
Jess is picking Lilia up from school a little bit late. Lilia had a meeting after school. Lilia is going on her 8th grade trip to Washington DC in 2 weeks. 2 weeks is how long there is left of school. Jess didn’t realize how soon that was coming. The day of Lilia’s last day of school she leaves with her classmates and teachers to go to Washington DC. There is a student meeting today and a parent meeting next week. Jess has a checklist of things to get Lilia. Lilia needs a certain debit card to use while she is away. It is stressful. Lilia has traveled alone twice; however, it was just to disneyland. There were two times when she flew alone. Tommy and Caden have also flown alone. Lilia has never flown alone this far. They live in California and Washington DC is across the country. Jess is nervous but excited for Lilia. Lilia is excited that she is going with her friends. Sending Lilia across the nation is stressful. Jess has so much to do today. Urgent care really set back her day. Jess has so many things she needs to accomplish. Mothers day is in a few days and Jess has so many things in store even though she is a mother and should be chilling. Jess wants to have a barbeque and make it cute. Jess wants it pink themed and wants to set it up before mothers day. It will be gorgeous weather and hot on mothers day. They are going to have their first pool day of the season. Jess is excited for it and here for the beautiful weather. Jess has to get ready for that. Jess also needs to post a video today. She has been back on her youtube schedule for the most part. Now that Jess is on 3 platforms full time it is harder to stick to her every other day posting schedule. On tiktok she tries to post every day or every other day. That is also a fulltime job like youtube. Jess essentially has 2 full time jobs. Jess also posts it all to instagram. Jess tries to stick to her every other day schedule and has been doing pretty good. If not every other day, she tries to do it every 3 days. She is also posting on a platform every day. Jess is trying to make youtube more regular and more consistent. She has been doing all right every 2-3 days.
Lilia can only bring 1 small suitcase and a carryon backpack. They can't bring any liquids. They are also going to New york. On the first day they are going to get right off the plane and straight to doing things after their red eye flight. They can only use their phones for photos and no social media. They do have to bring a phone. They are not allowed to go to the last day of school. They are to stay home that day and pack. Jess is scared and doesn’t want Lilia to go without her. Jess wants constant updates. Lilia doesn’t know if she is allowed to send Jess pictures. They are allowed to use their phones to take pictures and contact your chaperone. They can only contact their parents if it is necessary. Jess at least wants Lilia to text at the end of the night. They are going to see outsiders the musical. Lilia is going to take a lot of photos because that is her only excuse to be on her phone.
Jess dropped Lilia off and is picking up Addie to go to cheer. It is a jump class. There are fly classes, jump classes and tumbling classes. Today is a jump class. Addie has not done this class yet. Jess has been living in the tesla today. There was a hit and run on their property. Someone took out their mailbox yesterday. They got it on camera. They couldn’t see the actual act of it but they could tell which car hit their mailbox and wiped it out completely. The car didn’t say anything and just kept right on going. It took out their side view mirror. That was a little scary.
Addie loved the class. It was Addie’s first time doing the class. It is crazy to Jess watching her child fall in love with something on her own. Cheer is Addies’ own passion. Addie was a dancer for the last few years and she did like it but didn’t love it. Addie is loving her new sport. The same thing happened with the boys and soccer. Jess doesn’t know anything about soccer and the boys absolutely love it. (Maybe the reason why her kids love doing sports that Jess has no experience with is because they are tired of Jess comparing their accomplishments to hers.) Jess loves watching her kids fall in love with things they want to do. Kyson’s doctor called back and confirmed that there are no breaks and that he does have osgood schlatter’s disease. Jess learned that there are alot of people that have this disease. Most of the time it is something that is grown out of. It is a disease that happens in young athletes.
2024.05.14 03:31 Melodic_You_54 39 [M4R] #Maryland/DC/Virginia Looking for friends to hang out with
I need more friends to hang out with. I love the ones I have, but they're either too busy with family life or they take too much energy to interact with regularly. People grow apart sometimes, and that's totally fine. It has just left me pretty lonely. As introverted and protective of my me time as I am, I need good people in my life.
A little about me:
I'm very laid back and non-judgmental. It's impossible to know what's going on in someone's head, so I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, even if they piss me off.
I have been divorced since 2021, and I've been happier for it. I have always struggled with depression and anxiety, and my marriage certainly didn't help. Therapy and dedication to self-improvement has been immensely helpful, though. I still have my bad days, but I am light-years ahead of where I was just a few years ago. I'm currently single and would like to be in a healthy romantic partnership at some point, but I'm not in a hurry to be attached to anyone. It needs to happen organically.
I'm a firm believer in choosing kindness and empathy. Even if someone doesn't deserve to be treated with kindness, I do it anyway for my own sake. I come from a long line of hotheads, and I have been an asshole more times in my past than I care to admit. I try very hard to walk a fine line between not being a doormat while always being the bigger person.
I love science fiction. Star Trek, Star Wars, The Expanse, Dune... If it takes place in space and/or on other planets and involves weird but cool shit, I'll likely love it.
I love heavy music. Deathcore, metalcore, hardcore, nu-metal... If it's heavy, I fuck with it. I go to concerts regularly, mostly heavy bands. I do like other music, too, though. Love me some jazz and folk. I can definitely get down with some hip-hop and rap if I'm in the right head space.
I love going to the movies. I typically see at least one movie a week.
I love cooking. Admittedly, I tend to get stuck on the few recipes I already know, but I'm always willing to branch out and try new things.
I'm very introverted and can be pretty quiet, but I can carry a conversation. When I speak, I try to do so with intention. There are certainly times when I need to get stuff off of my chest, but I try not to just brain dump on people. I tend to be a homebody, but I get cabin fever quickly if I stay inside for too long.
I love art. I'm not much of an artist myself, but I have a soft spot for paintings and drawings.
I love animals. I have a cat named Chani. She's a brat, but I adore her.
I feel like that's a pretty good summation of my personality without giving too much away. If you think we would vibe, I would love to hear from you. The closer you are to me, the better, but I'm never opposed to driving an hour or so to see good people.
The final thing I'll say is please don't ghost me. If at some point you decide you're not feeling me or the chemistry just isn't there, just tell me. I promise I won't take it personally or make a big deal out of it. Thanks.
submitted by Melodic_You_54 to R4R30Plus [link] [comments]
A little about me:
I'm very laid back and non-judgmental. It's impossible to know what's going on in someone's head, so I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, even if they piss me off.
I have been divorced since 2021, and I've been happier for it. I have always struggled with depression and anxiety, and my marriage certainly didn't help. Therapy and dedication to self-improvement has been immensely helpful, though. I still have my bad days, but I am light-years ahead of where I was just a few years ago. I'm currently single and would like to be in a healthy romantic partnership at some point, but I'm not in a hurry to be attached to anyone. It needs to happen organically.
I'm a firm believer in choosing kindness and empathy. Even if someone doesn't deserve to be treated with kindness, I do it anyway for my own sake. I come from a long line of hotheads, and I have been an asshole more times in my past than I care to admit. I try very hard to walk a fine line between not being a doormat while always being the bigger person.
I love science fiction. Star Trek, Star Wars, The Expanse, Dune... If it takes place in space and/or on other planets and involves weird but cool shit, I'll likely love it.
I love heavy music. Deathcore, metalcore, hardcore, nu-metal... If it's heavy, I fuck with it. I go to concerts regularly, mostly heavy bands. I do like other music, too, though. Love me some jazz and folk. I can definitely get down with some hip-hop and rap if I'm in the right head space.
I love going to the movies. I typically see at least one movie a week.
I love cooking. Admittedly, I tend to get stuck on the few recipes I already know, but I'm always willing to branch out and try new things.
I'm very introverted and can be pretty quiet, but I can carry a conversation. When I speak, I try to do so with intention. There are certainly times when I need to get stuff off of my chest, but I try not to just brain dump on people. I tend to be a homebody, but I get cabin fever quickly if I stay inside for too long.
I love art. I'm not much of an artist myself, but I have a soft spot for paintings and drawings.
I love animals. I have a cat named Chani. She's a brat, but I adore her.
I feel like that's a pretty good summation of my personality without giving too much away. If you think we would vibe, I would love to hear from you. The closer you are to me, the better, but I'm never opposed to driving an hour or so to see good people.
The final thing I'll say is please don't ghost me. If at some point you decide you're not feeling me or the chemistry just isn't there, just tell me. I promise I won't take it personally or make a big deal out of it. Thanks.
2024.05.14 03:30 grunpykitten I already made a post like this but im making another one, i want to be a boy but im not trans
im 14 F and would like to be a boy, im not trans. i dont think men have easier lives than women, but i want to be a man. theres nothing wrong with women as a whole but i hate being one simply because of feelings and aesthetics, i think men are just better to look at, i see myself in the mirror i see an hourglass and narrow shoulders, but i want to be beefy and bulky built like a triangle, i want to be super tall and with the body of a man, i want a 5'o clock shadow and a moustache, i want clothes to fit me the same way they fit boys. even if i was a muscular woman i just dont like the way it looks, any talk of sexual dimorphism or biology really drives me insane which i know is bad but i hate the fact i was born as a woman, it feels humiliating for people to even look at me. i try to look like a man just so people will see me as one, even when it makes no difference. and when i say i want to be muscular i dont mean toned or fit, i mean i want to look straight out of a bara yaoi. ill see women who are comfortable in their bodies and i honestly feel confused and a bit angry, why are you happy and girly?? what is the appeal of looking like a girl. i really just dont know. last night my sister brought up the fact i was a girl and i kind of snapped at her i just hate talking about it it makes me sick. even if i was trans id never be a real man id never fully look like one, but im not trans. im a Christian and in a conservative family, so id never consider it. obviously im going to put my god over my feelings, but idk if the feelings will ever go away. ever since i was a little girl i would dress up like a boy, and not because i felt comfortable but because i truly felt like being one. there was countless occasions where i would tell someone i was a boy, i would tell my sisters friends im her brother, i would introduce myself with random boy names. on all my socials people think im a guy. its like being a girl is only okay when other girls do it. i used to think i was trans in 4th-5th grade but ik i was just young and going through a phase which is fine, i was just exploring new things. but really ive been tame my whole life about being a girl, i mean im normally pretty layed back, so i was kind of shocked that i got so upset after my sister reminded me of my biology. i still feel upset over it, i feel like lately the urge has been getting worse, a week ago i cut off all my hair and ive started working out again. i went to the movies with a group of unfamiliar people and tried my best to look like a guy. i think really its because i feel like i have a male brain(not to sound like a pick me) and it feels awkward having a masculine brain and appearing female, it just seems like being a man fits me so much better. my roblox avatars are always male, i have boards on Pinterest about how i would dress, style my hair, etc- if i was a man. i feel like being a woman sets me back, im pretty dumb, i dont like anything traditionally feminine, im a wrestler and know that my biology gives me a disadvantage and it makes me seethe daily, knowing men out there hate me so much for what i was born, that i'll never be taken seriously, and no one believes in me. but also i know lots of men dont really think about stuff like that, and i for sure seek out media to enable me. its not just the appearance and strength of men that i want but the experience, i want to be a chivalrous gentleman with male friends, i want to wear swim trunks to the beach instead of a swimsuit, i want to be waiting outside of a changing room in a clothing store with other men doing the same thing, i want to play on the boys team in sports, use the mens restroom, etc-. i want to go through male experiences and live a male life, i want to be raised as a boy. the main thing holding me back from being trans besides god is that boys like girls, and i really like boys and want to kiss and date them, i like everything about boys and everything masculine. i hate anything to do with gender roles or "male and female" which sounds so liberal and newgen but its true, it makes me so uncomfortable like i cant stand even hearing about it because i know ill end up getting a reality check, that im a girl and cant compete with boys. its just odd to me since most girls want to look like Adriana Lima or Megan Fox, but i wanna look like Jake Gyllenhaal with the body of Arnold Schwarzenegger. again im not trans because its not natural and im a Christian but has anyone else ever felt this way?? i mean do you think I'll ever grow out of this?
submitted by grunpykitten to helpme [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 03:28 Fit-Cry-6302 Sophomore in high school tryna make a manga ain’t rly know what else to do but tryna see what ppl think and get out there🤷🏽♂️
January 29, 2384 - the day of the last total eclipse is when the raid began. “The day of the sun's false shadow” as people call it now. We, humans, were an unsuspecting victims in a universe habited by multiple vastly stronger existences. When it happened the world had been thrown into utter chaos and shock. The sun had been completely covered by the moon and this event was supposed to last only a short while however after two hours sunlight had still not shown its face upon the earth's surface. This was the beginning of humanity's greatest tribulation. After days of the sun's light not being shown the planet's temperature began to drop and to compensate for this people began to create massive fires but this did not stop the problem. Photosynthesis in plants began to stop, making it harder for humans to breathe. This made humans build labs and create artificial oxygen, which took care of that problem but humans still began to die from hypothermia, frozen oceans, and forced stoppage of blood flow. After two weeks, the sun finally revealed itself and all hope had been restored in humanity collectively only for half the population to be massacred in an instant. “The watchers” had been slowly waiting with armies to colonize our planet and technology beyond our wild comprehension. Technology we can only dream of had been shown and used right before our very eyes and for the first time in all of human history, we had been united as one in our mutual fear and horror. 2 months later, 90% of humanity has been wiped out and the few who remained were used as slaves to cultivate energy. With the use of a Dyson shell, nearly 80% of the sun's energy and heat had been directed into maintaining their energy. Amongst all this time, humanity had collectively agreed to fight back. This began the creation of the liberation group, “the Plague”. These groups of people were the last hope of humanity and carried an extremely large ambition and dream on their shoulders. While “the watchers” were extremely advanced this doesn't change the fact that they were fallible and this group of people were their scourge. They didn't have the military might nor the advanced brain to even keep up against “the watchers” but through slavery and forced labor, the human body began to develop into something stronger. They began to surpass their limits and break the barriers that the human mind had once placed on themselves. Through the selective farming of “the watchers” a new plant had developed that was essentially a stimulant to the human body and a limit breaker for their physical capabilities. At first, they began by using strong levels of acid to corrode the buildings and structures and then stopping their heartbeat to give the impression of suicide so they could not be caught, however, they did not die due to a new system developed from the human's newfound evolution. Due to the strict regimen that we had to follow, we knew all of the places where they would and wouldn't be, all the blind spots of the planet, all the places where they were in close proximity to a chasm, and all the places where we were at a disadvantage. We used the blindspots as bases and hideouts where we could plan our vengeance. After a year of just observing their behavior, habits, bodily functions, and even their schedules we developed a hypothesis that 24 seconds after 7:39 PM we have approximately 19 minutes and 53 seconds in Greenland where we are not being watched nor located. We used this small window of time to gather the fundamental items we needed to fight back and build the foundation for our organization. We gathered food, plants, water, armor, and weapons. We realized that they were immune to cutting/slicing damage and could only be hurt through blunt attacks. With this knowledge, we developed a specific fighting style and used that small time frame to train others in it. We adapted to the harsh conditions and created clothes using spare pieces from “the watchers” specially made for insulating heat, weighing less, and being less penetrable by outside attacks. After a year every person on the planet was a master at this martial arts and had fully developed a counter to all technology that “the watchers” had. However, we could not initiate immediate war on them so we needed a plan. We came up with the idea to have one of our strongest members report to the watchers about our activity and give away one of our bases. This created the false notion that not only did they have someone working as a double agent on their side but also they knew where we would be so they could catch us off guard. We were all there like they expected and they attacked like planned. We had all moved our weapons, armor, and vital items into a different base but kept some things where they attacked to make them think we had not gotten far but this was a dud. Eventually, we had all “died” and had our bodies left at that place as a sign of victory on their side. However, because of this, their ego had grown and they began to underestimate us. The surveillance had gotten weaker as they assumed their “double agent” would tell them everything as a trade for luxury living. We knew that physical power would not be enough so our smartest man collaborated to develop a virus specifically made for their genetic makeup which took about 5 years to extract small strands of DNA without them realizing. Once the virus had been created the incidence began and eliminated more than 60 percent of “the watchers” because of how they were too distracted trying to develop a cure and the vast amount of them dying, we had gained more time to develop our forces and we began to ingest various harmful substances but in small doses in order to gain resistance to any harmful poisons and acids. After new children start to be born this began the origin of a new human species. One massively stronger, smarter, more durable, and with all the immunities and benefits without the downsides. With the birth of this new generation, all of the human race had experienced a collective euphoria. We had begun to secretly train these kids for years and strengthen them in a way the human race had never been before. Due to the circumstances of their birth, they had also developed a strong ability for adaptation and healing factor which ultimately led to humans finally being able to physically compete with “the watchers”. However, we were still lacking in numbers despite the virus taking a vast majority of “the watchers” away. Some of us grew confident and because we were now physically capable some believed we could win the war while others believed we couldn’t yet. This created division within our ranks but did not necessarily break our ranks but that was all depending on your interpretation. We gathered our smartest men and women to make a plan to initiate war, and for 14 days they were stuck in ruminative thought. 2 years passed and we had finally built up the numbers, technology, and physical capabilities to contend with the watchers. Now on the day of the war, all of our strongest soldiers imitated the attack. But this time they were an unsuspecting victim on a planet habited by a stronger species. During the war we had counters for nearly everything the watchers could dish out but one thing we were not aware of was the fact that the watchers could transform into a smaller but faster, stronger, and more durable form. This form took the shape of humankind. So closely related that it struck fear into the hearts of many. Not only was this extremely off-putting but the revelation that came along with it had altered the perception of humanity as we know it. The war had been put to a halt, and all forced fighting in the war had directed their attention to one watcher and one watcher alone. All forces had been completely immobilized and fighting back was no longer capable. With this, the words that had been spoken out of the watcher were a revelation that humanity had not even considered possible. “We are not your enemies. We are you but from the future. In our original timeline, we have been attacked by a species even higher than us. We had been pushed to the brink of extinction and our last hope was only to go back in time in hopes that if we returned to our past selves we could help evolve even more to contend with the world-ending threats from the future. This siege we had laid on this planet and the forced evolution, progression, and tragedy among humankind also brought extreme progression in human capabilities. All of you are vastly superior to your previous forms because of our arrival. While we acknowledge our methods were not the ideal we had no other option. This was the fastest and most effective method to progress the human species although we could not allow the human race to have this win. It would boost the ego of your race and our all of you in a state of comfort and stagnation. With this being said we resign from our participation in this war and would greatly appreciate it if you allowed us to help humanity rebuild and donate technology.” Speechless as to what humanity has just heard we just stood there in utter shock and disbelief. Not a single soul knew what to say and all of humanity had stood in confusion. One man spoke “how do we know this is true” the watcher proceeded to show pictures and videos of them being massacred while some stood in human form and others did not. They showed is this along with the words, “we initiated this war as a way to put the human race through natural selection and eliminate all the weak human being who would not be able to contribute to our growth and success in any upcoming battle. So with that being said what is your decision?” Our leader, and the smartest woman among us had stated, “We humbly decline this offer as we would prefer to evolve by our capabilities and we have already surpassed you so what can you possibly teach us.” After this being stated the war had been started again and the watchers had been for the first time since the “great cleansing” began utterly defeated and annihilated. With the war being won, humanity being victorious, and newfound abilities being discovered humanity had been thrown into an era of peace and prosperity. All tragedies had been blamed on the watchers and for the first time humanity had an ever lasting peace and a perfect utopia where everyone agreed and benefited from each other. With this, we have been vastly improving and slowly but steadily rebuilding our planet and all of humankind. Our members started family’s and genuinely enjoyed the life they were living once again. Everyone acting coyly and with one another was a beautiful side to behold. Everything was perfect until the same monsters who killed the watchers, showed up to eliminate us due to fear of what we could evolve into this time we had no way to fight back and our ranks were already diminished or severely weakened. How would humanity be able to survive this time???Most people had been massacre and captures to be experimented on. Very few of us had actually managed to get away from them and we had only been able to do this through shadow banishment. It was a skill that we had acquired through the technology of the watchers. Living in the void was not the ideal lifestyle as it was ruthless, dirty, and unsafe but the chances of surviving here were massively higher than surviving on earth. Only a hundred of us remained and the human species were basically extinct. With this small group left we had resorted to instead of trying to repopulate and exact revenge immediately we would take the short route. In the void monsters had no sort of civilization and the only rule amongst these creatures were the strongest prevail. There was no sort of rule, order, or even a sense of respect between these monsters. The weak were prey for the strongest, and the strong were killed by the stronger. We took this as an opportunity to not only increase our strength by training and battling but also amassing an empire. The remind of humanity collectively agree that we would bring order and peace to the void. The best way to go through this was by entering the tournament. The monsters held tournaments to watch the strongest fight and kill each other for pure fun. We joined this colosseum and while at first we easily overwhelmed our opponents we had slowly been facing harder and harder opponents as we rose through the ranks. By the time even a single one of us was defeated we had made a name and gained the attention of multiple monsters within the void. We were not necessarily respected or followed but we were feared and simultaneously an opponent that monsters wished to fight. After this we had developed our own fighting ring in which monster could fight and battle against us and only us. We implied a set of rules in this ring. Rule 1; no killing Rule 2; reservations must be made to fight Rule 3; both parties must consent Rule 4; do not make the fight personal Rule 5; it must be between a human and monster. These rules created a sense of security amongst the monsters and while driven by their desire of battle they also abided by the rules. Eventually after fighting throughout the tournament and gaining more traction with the monsters in it. Eventually even the most high ranked demons had begun to make reservations in for our fights. Our strongest soldiers had been the ones to fight them as nobody else can really compete. The first fight had been with a demon who had the ability of immunity. This ability did not only revolve around internal status effects but also could be applied to his physical body. The fight had been the biggest one the ring had ever experienced and it did not disappoint. Eventually we had won and this through the whole entire void and everyone in it into an uproar. Monsters who never even bothered to fight had shown up to battle. The strongest monster in the void and the only monster with a sense of order, self, and purpose had shown up to fight all humans by himself. He agreed that if we win he would pledge allegiance to us all and work under our rule however if we lose we will be killed. This monster bore an extreme resemblance humans. The structure of his body and the contents of it were all human like however he claimed not to be. This monsters name was angel and he possessed the ability to manipulate and control all matter with the sole exception of any other organic material that resided outside of his own body. Our commander and strongest member amongst us was the person to fight him. His name was Alexander and despite the fact that we didn't have any singular special powers like him however our physical bodies were honed greater than any other species in existence. They were evenly matched in speed and strength and even in our capabilities to rapidly heal from damage. They had been evenly matched in all physical ability and the fight had ultimately come to hand to hand combat and who could last longer. Angel was unmatched in combat and had barely even been hit due to how experienced in martial arts he had been; however throughout the fight Alexander had been naturally adapting to his fighting style and developing counters to everything. Our natural ability to adapt to all attacks and effects placed upon us had given a clear win condition; however time was needed to actually see and fully understand how to possibly adapt to everything. The longer the fight took the higher the chance of Angel losing. Alexander had slowly but steadily been adapting and developing new combat styles to counter everything angle could do and even had grown to use his own severed limbs as projectiles and use his blood as a coat over all other objects to cancel his ability to use his field. Angel's main ability had been to control the air around him to increase speed, power, and even get a sense of what his opponent would be doing before it happened. After finally adapting to this his body had begun to heat itself in an attempt to turn it into vapor and due to blood being organic matter of another life form he would no longer have control of the air and the surrounding area. After this the fight had come down to solely base physical capabilities and for 10 minutes they had been mindlessly brawling and instantaneously healing through the damage taken. After a long period of time their healing began to slow down due to bodily fatigue. Biting, punching, scratching, kicking, anything you can think of, they did it. That fight was a bloodbath unlike anything else and in the end they both passed out on the floor with nothing left besides their bodies soaked and bathed in each other's blood. After they had both been knocked unconscious their bodies had been left there in anticipation for them to awaken. The ring filled beyond capacity as people argued and fought about who would awaken first. In anticipation for this once in a lifetime event the whole void had stopped with all its attention. Angel was the first to awaken and he had been exhausted and utterly stunned as to how he actually had gotten knocked out. He had the opportunity to kill his opponent as he had technically won the battle but out of respect for his opponents strength and capabilities he possessed. After the fight had finished Angel had left and was never to be seen again. After 2 weeks Alexander had awoken in a small shack being guarded by one other human and confused after everything had been explained to him he had went around looking for angel but he was not to be found. After awakening Alexander had been massively stronger than before. Due to the physical state his body was put in and all the damage that he had taken from Angel his body had adapted and become more dense in order to take all the attacks while sustaining the least amount of damage possible. After his awakening this began our political revolution. We had now implemented the ring with rules and gotten multiple monsters to follow by these rules and with them being accurate to filling orders more now we had decided to initiate a leadedictator in a sense. The top 5 strongest creatures in the void had been the leaders and this had consisted of Alexander at 1, 2 other demons at 2 and 3, and humans to fill the final spots. We began to implement laws and rules in order to stop the mass murder and destruction happening and within a small time frame we had created structures similar to the ones of the earth. Houses and gyms in order to train in hopes of becoming stronger and even professional combat sports. After 2 months time had passed we had developed a military with our best members in it and humbly had began to repopulate. All this had been done in hopes of regaining the earth and defeated our oppressors. Fast forward 1 months the and the siege of the home planet had begun. They had not been suspecting us however took the preparations in case we had come. Based and soldiers set up in every corner of the world to fight back when the time came we did come back. With this an all out war for the fate of humanity had began and the extinction of either race lay in the balance between life and death.
After the war had began all forces had been deployed to different areas of the planet. Groups that had worked together best being deployed to one part while our strongest being deployed to another. At first we had been nearly even in everything besides technology. They had everything that we lacked and this gave them the combative edge. However despite lacking in technology we made up for it in numbers. Most fights had consisted of large groups of monsters fighting against one or two of our enemy and this has convoluted till their forces had been somewhat deployed. The one on one fights had been more dragged out and heavily impacted the war. Our strongest soldiers fighting against their strongest soldiers in a one on one fight. Everyone has put their all into this battle and left nothing to spare. Our second and third strongest soldiers had the most impact in this war not because of who they fought but because of what they could do. They didn’t actually have abilities specific to them but instead they were born with a type of energy within their bodies in which they called “synergy”. This synergy could be used to amp all their physical abilities but also be used to crate and use techniques or even use techniques that are specific to the traits of the individuals soul. The strength and physical stats of the individual depended on how much synergy they had at their disposal and while some of them were able to gather strength from other life forms it was not a very common occurrence. Alexander fought someone with the ability to control and manipulate momentum. They used synergy and funneled it through all objects of their choice to increase or decrease of momentum of that. This didn’t do much on a wide scale and was a very basic ability but in a solo battle this made it extremely hard to land attacks and even when they were landed they did little to no damage. The most important one to kill had the ability to manipulate all probability. Meaning the likelihood of us even winning this war was less then .0001 percent with them being alive. Whether it was because of a collection of small losses or one major loss did not make a difference. All odds were stacked against us as long as this person remained on the battlefield. In simple terms the whole war relied on the defeat of that person. Our second in command and smartest soldier, “Cassandra” decided to take this upon herself. She was the only one among us who possessed an innate ability and was viewed as the most special soldier but this came at a cost. She gained a talent no other human possessed but in return she no longer had the natural ability to adapt to all circumstances. Her ability was to take the form and attributes of any and all creature she knew to exist. Mythical or not she could take the shape and ability of these creatures and use it as long as she desired. However she could only use one at a time and had to wait 30 seconds in between shifting. Our third in command, “Vladimir” had took the roll of fighting their head technologist. While his opponent had not specialized in battle he still was one of the most dangerous and this was because of his ability to create machines as small as molecular level that shared his thoughts and emotions. These machines were used to repair his body in case on injury, transport information, invade any opponents body and restrict movement, anything that he deemed possible could be done with the use of those machines. But he chose to mainly use them as sort of technological tools to help him further advance his society. The rest of our battles were not nearly as important and were mostly group battles. Afro the beginning portion of Alexander’s fight he had been losing severely and could barely land any attacks at all. After a few minutes of getting beat down and not being able to fight back the adaptation process began. The first adaptation was only a temporary solution to the problem but his body had been explosively shooting out sharpened pieces of his bones and even using tiny droplets of blood as weapons. However this was only a temporary solution because eventually those bones and blood just started being slowed also. The final adaptation and most effective one happened when his body created a function in which he can store kinetic energy and then release it at any given time. This allowed him to rapidly boost his speed whenever his momentum had been slowed and basically cancel out his opponent power. However this still did not stop how his opponent made himself significantly faster. After this the fight had been more tipped into Alexander’s favor but still not enough to actually win. Throughout the progression of the fight Alexander had been gathering more and make friction between the clothes he had and his feet running against the floor. After gathering as much friction and kinetic energy as possible he let it all explode and release all over his body. This altered the form of his body. His body and skin began to form cracks and let off steam. He began to turn dark red and his eyes became shot with blood. His body was slowly crumbling and deteriorating. He had 5 minutes left to defeat his opponent and if he did not then his body would crumble and he would die. Due to his rapid healing factor he had a chance of living if he was able to end the fight within 5 minutes and give himself some time to rest but this all depended on how much he could get done. The battle had been tilted all the way in Alexander’s favor and had no longer been a battle. It had turned into if his opponent could outlast him in those 5 minutes. Brutally beating his opponent and taking full advantage of the situation Alexander did not relent on his rampage. Stopping his momentum no longer mattered and it seemed like the more he tried the faster Alexander got. Steam had been blowing off him. In the end he had managed to kill his opponent within those 5 minutes and had been at deaths door. Cassandra had began her battle and had been absolutely obliterating her opponent. The ability to shape shift from dragons, unicorns, hydras, centaurs, and any mythical creature you can think of. At first she had taken the abilities of a dragon but throughout the fight she had been developing into stronger and more complex creatures. After a while her opponent had been decreasing the probability of her even landing attacks. This made it extremely hard for her to fight and maintain the advantage. She took the appearance and abilities of the mythical deity sun wukong. Due to sun wukong being a monkey that ascended into a higher power he is one of the only gods that she can transform into. After this she gained the ability to not only make clones out of every hair on her body but also multiply the power of each clone. While she does not possess every power sun wukong has she possesses some of them and the most prominent ones. This fight had been a one sided beatdown and only lasted longer than 2 minutes because the probability of each clone attacking each other had been raised to its maximum percentage. Despite this every 1000 punches that had been thrown at least 1 hit her opponent and this was more than he could handle from millions of clones. Vladimir had no special capabilities; he only possessed an extremely honed body and battle experience. At first they had been near equal but the battle began to take a turn when the tiny bugs began to infest his body and eat him from the inside. Due to his advanced healing factor he had been able to stop any significant damage and fight with mild discomfort but this did not change that if he continued in for a longer period of time then he would inevitably be defeated by these bugs and killed. This made the battle a race against time. Expending everything his body had to offer and leaving not a single drop of energy left. Pushing his body to the absolute peak and physical limit. Even going beyond the known capabilities of his body he began to evolve into a higher form. He did not develop any new type of power or gain a newfound power but he did increase and rapidly evolve his physical capabilities. He began to punch with such speed and strength that he created shockwaves from breaking the sound barrier. With this his punches became far more explosive and with every punch thrown he was exploding giant parts of his opponents body and everything within the perimeter. With no regard to his surroundings the battle had destroyed everything in sight and left them fighting in a bare wasteland. Basically erasing everything within line of his punches he began to annihilate his opponent with speed and strength unmatched. Due to all the tiny machines within his body he regrow limbs and was able to counter attack with near no fatigue or even lag in his action. While pushing his body to its absolute limit his body had given up on him. Rapidly healing from constant damage, pushing muscles to their utmost limit, moving, attacking at his highest speed, and even understanding/ perception of all attacks massively faster then he could ever before. Due to all this his body began to give out and in the midst of battle he fell and was unable to recover. No longer able to fight back and maintain the performance he had, he was defeated. Being eaten from the inside, limbs being torn from his body, and being damaged so much that not even his regeneration could keep up. His head had been ripped off his body and with this humanity had suffered its first major loss. After this all other forces began to gain support from all his other bugs and humanities forces had been rapidly depleting. With loss in sight humanity had lost hope and accepted defeat. Right when humanity had accepted defeat and all hope had been lost the king had shown himself once again. Like an Angel coming to bless all of humanity he had run through and obliterated all enemies of humanity. Destroying everything in sight and bringing all enemies to his feet he had saved humanity and restored hope and just like that he had disappeared into the void once again. There was no explanation as to how or why but in that moment all of humanity knew who we would be forever grateful and indebted to. Not many opponents had been left standing but the few who were, were extremely weakened and overwhelmed by numbers. After this decisive battle humanity had been in a state of joy and excitement out of their new victory. Once all the excitement and happiness from winning had worn off all the sorrow and remorse from the losses had come rushing in. All the lost family members, dead soldiers, limbs lost, and mental trauma had taken a toll on humanity. After we had gotten our planet back we did not spend our time rebuilding and trying to repopulate. We spent months mourning the loss of our loved ones and all our soldiers. We laid in depression and sorrow for our mutual loss and mental trauma. This brought humanity closer as a whole and we bonded over our suffering. Humanity had been one but at what cost. After years of processing humanity had finally been able to rebuild all of our structures, population, and even expand to different planets. After all these trials and tribulations we had finally evolved completely and after ages of loss we had finally entered a golden age of humanity. After all this we had begun to explore the deep parts of our planet and while exploring we discovered something far beyond our comprehension. Humanity had only been a small part of a vastly bigger world and a whole new world had now been exposed to us. We had breached through the ice caps of the north pole and had been greeted with hostility from a race on our planet we did not even know existed. After entering this “new world” humanity had found out the truth of our existence and creation. After finding out the truth of our creation and the prophecy of our faith we had all collectively regretted winning that war. Beyond our world laid horrors and truths we were not yet prepared for. After all this we had once again been thrown into a dark age with no will to fight. In the end this was the beginning of the end for humanity…
submitted by Fit-Cry-6302 to u/Fit-Cry-6302 [link] [comments]
After the war had began all forces had been deployed to different areas of the planet. Groups that had worked together best being deployed to one part while our strongest being deployed to another. At first we had been nearly even in everything besides technology. They had everything that we lacked and this gave them the combative edge. However despite lacking in technology we made up for it in numbers. Most fights had consisted of large groups of monsters fighting against one or two of our enemy and this has convoluted till their forces had been somewhat deployed. The one on one fights had been more dragged out and heavily impacted the war. Our strongest soldiers fighting against their strongest soldiers in a one on one fight. Everyone has put their all into this battle and left nothing to spare. Our second and third strongest soldiers had the most impact in this war not because of who they fought but because of what they could do. They didn’t actually have abilities specific to them but instead they were born with a type of energy within their bodies in which they called “synergy”. This synergy could be used to amp all their physical abilities but also be used to crate and use techniques or even use techniques that are specific to the traits of the individuals soul. The strength and physical stats of the individual depended on how much synergy they had at their disposal and while some of them were able to gather strength from other life forms it was not a very common occurrence. Alexander fought someone with the ability to control and manipulate momentum. They used synergy and funneled it through all objects of their choice to increase or decrease of momentum of that. This didn’t do much on a wide scale and was a very basic ability but in a solo battle this made it extremely hard to land attacks and even when they were landed they did little to no damage. The most important one to kill had the ability to manipulate all probability. Meaning the likelihood of us even winning this war was less then .0001 percent with them being alive. Whether it was because of a collection of small losses or one major loss did not make a difference. All odds were stacked against us as long as this person remained on the battlefield. In simple terms the whole war relied on the defeat of that person. Our second in command and smartest soldier, “Cassandra” decided to take this upon herself. She was the only one among us who possessed an innate ability and was viewed as the most special soldier but this came at a cost. She gained a talent no other human possessed but in return she no longer had the natural ability to adapt to all circumstances. Her ability was to take the form and attributes of any and all creature she knew to exist. Mythical or not she could take the shape and ability of these creatures and use it as long as she desired. However she could only use one at a time and had to wait 30 seconds in between shifting. Our third in command, “Vladimir” had took the roll of fighting their head technologist. While his opponent had not specialized in battle he still was one of the most dangerous and this was because of his ability to create machines as small as molecular level that shared his thoughts and emotions. These machines were used to repair his body in case on injury, transport information, invade any opponents body and restrict movement, anything that he deemed possible could be done with the use of those machines. But he chose to mainly use them as sort of technological tools to help him further advance his society. The rest of our battles were not nearly as important and were mostly group battles. Afro the beginning portion of Alexander’s fight he had been losing severely and could barely land any attacks at all. After a few minutes of getting beat down and not being able to fight back the adaptation process began. The first adaptation was only a temporary solution to the problem but his body had been explosively shooting out sharpened pieces of his bones and even using tiny droplets of blood as weapons. However this was only a temporary solution because eventually those bones and blood just started being slowed also. The final adaptation and most effective one happened when his body created a function in which he can store kinetic energy and then release it at any given time. This allowed him to rapidly boost his speed whenever his momentum had been slowed and basically cancel out his opponent power. However this still did not stop how his opponent made himself significantly faster. After this the fight had been more tipped into Alexander’s favor but still not enough to actually win. Throughout the progression of the fight Alexander had been gathering more and make friction between the clothes he had and his feet running against the floor. After gathering as much friction and kinetic energy as possible he let it all explode and release all over his body. This altered the form of his body. His body and skin began to form cracks and let off steam. He began to turn dark red and his eyes became shot with blood. His body was slowly crumbling and deteriorating. He had 5 minutes left to defeat his opponent and if he did not then his body would crumble and he would die. Due to his rapid healing factor he had a chance of living if he was able to end the fight within 5 minutes and give himself some time to rest but this all depended on how much he could get done. The battle had been tilted all the way in Alexander’s favor and had no longer been a battle. It had turned into if his opponent could outlast him in those 5 minutes. Brutally beating his opponent and taking full advantage of the situation Alexander did not relent on his rampage. Stopping his momentum no longer mattered and it seemed like the more he tried the faster Alexander got. Steam had been blowing off him. In the end he had managed to kill his opponent within those 5 minutes and had been at deaths door. Cassandra had began her battle and had been absolutely obliterating her opponent. The ability to shape shift from dragons, unicorns, hydras, centaurs, and any mythical creature you can think of. At first she had taken the abilities of a dragon but throughout the fight she had been developing into stronger and more complex creatures. After a while her opponent had been decreasing the probability of her even landing attacks. This made it extremely hard for her to fight and maintain the advantage. She took the appearance and abilities of the mythical deity sun wukong. Due to sun wukong being a monkey that ascended into a higher power he is one of the only gods that she can transform into. After this she gained the ability to not only make clones out of every hair on her body but also multiply the power of each clone. While she does not possess every power sun wukong has she possesses some of them and the most prominent ones. This fight had been a one sided beatdown and only lasted longer than 2 minutes because the probability of each clone attacking each other had been raised to its maximum percentage. Despite this every 1000 punches that had been thrown at least 1 hit her opponent and this was more than he could handle from millions of clones. Vladimir had no special capabilities; he only possessed an extremely honed body and battle experience. At first they had been near equal but the battle began to take a turn when the tiny bugs began to infest his body and eat him from the inside. Due to his advanced healing factor he had been able to stop any significant damage and fight with mild discomfort but this did not change that if he continued in for a longer period of time then he would inevitably be defeated by these bugs and killed. This made the battle a race against time. Expending everything his body had to offer and leaving not a single drop of energy left. Pushing his body to the absolute peak and physical limit. Even going beyond the known capabilities of his body he began to evolve into a higher form. He did not develop any new type of power or gain a newfound power but he did increase and rapidly evolve his physical capabilities. He began to punch with such speed and strength that he created shockwaves from breaking the sound barrier. With this his punches became far more explosive and with every punch thrown he was exploding giant parts of his opponents body and everything within the perimeter. With no regard to his surroundings the battle had destroyed everything in sight and left them fighting in a bare wasteland. Basically erasing everything within line of his punches he began to annihilate his opponent with speed and strength unmatched. Due to all the tiny machines within his body he regrow limbs and was able to counter attack with near no fatigue or even lag in his action. While pushing his body to its absolute limit his body had given up on him. Rapidly healing from constant damage, pushing muscles to their utmost limit, moving, attacking at his highest speed, and even understanding/ perception of all attacks massively faster then he could ever before. Due to all this his body began to give out and in the midst of battle he fell and was unable to recover. No longer able to fight back and maintain the performance he had, he was defeated. Being eaten from the inside, limbs being torn from his body, and being damaged so much that not even his regeneration could keep up. His head had been ripped off his body and with this humanity had suffered its first major loss. After this all other forces began to gain support from all his other bugs and humanities forces had been rapidly depleting. With loss in sight humanity had lost hope and accepted defeat. Right when humanity had accepted defeat and all hope had been lost the king had shown himself once again. Like an Angel coming to bless all of humanity he had run through and obliterated all enemies of humanity. Destroying everything in sight and bringing all enemies to his feet he had saved humanity and restored hope and just like that he had disappeared into the void once again. There was no explanation as to how or why but in that moment all of humanity knew who we would be forever grateful and indebted to. Not many opponents had been left standing but the few who were, were extremely weakened and overwhelmed by numbers. After this decisive battle humanity had been in a state of joy and excitement out of their new victory. Once all the excitement and happiness from winning had worn off all the sorrow and remorse from the losses had come rushing in. All the lost family members, dead soldiers, limbs lost, and mental trauma had taken a toll on humanity. After we had gotten our planet back we did not spend our time rebuilding and trying to repopulate. We spent months mourning the loss of our loved ones and all our soldiers. We laid in depression and sorrow for our mutual loss and mental trauma. This brought humanity closer as a whole and we bonded over our suffering. Humanity had been one but at what cost. After years of processing humanity had finally been able to rebuild all of our structures, population, and even expand to different planets. After all these trials and tribulations we had finally evolved completely and after ages of loss we had finally entered a golden age of humanity. After all this we had begun to explore the deep parts of our planet and while exploring we discovered something far beyond our comprehension. Humanity had only been a small part of a vastly bigger world and a whole new world had now been exposed to us. We had breached through the ice caps of the north pole and had been greeted with hostility from a race on our planet we did not even know existed. After entering this “new world” humanity had found out the truth of our existence and creation. After finding out the truth of our creation and the prophecy of our faith we had all collectively regretted winning that war. Beyond our world laid horrors and truths we were not yet prepared for. After all this we had once again been thrown into a dark age with no will to fight. In the end this was the beginning of the end for humanity…
2024.05.14 03:26 A5terdaftzx Looking for some opinions on my panoramic and lateral cephalometric radios.
 | Hi there! Hope y’all are doing well. 18 yo class ii male patient here. submitted by A5terdaftzx to askdentists [link] [comments] This is my very first post into the -askdentists subreddit, which I came across with some hours ago while looking out information on how to read the results for some evaluations I took yesterday (Ricketts and Steiner, specifically) due to problems caused by my lower wisdom teeth. I must first clarify however that there are other reasons for which i’m seeking help here. (For the record, i never drink nor actively smoke, however the air is pretty much polluted where i live in so might be equivalent to being a passive smoker aswell. this is also kind of a rant btw lol) You see, it’s been 4 years since I first identified problems with my jaw, regarding bite malposition and overall crowding of teeth. I continuously told both my parents and health professional about these concerns but they kept telling me not to make a big deal out of it. Over time consequences arrived and I was left not only deeply insecure about my physical appearance, but also worried that if left without treatment this could bring repercusions to my quality of life in a not-so distant future (propension towards allergies and other respiratory issues which i also had before, for example). I went on as my facial structure changed, accentuated some unwanted traits and these unattended issues kept progressing for the worse. The radiographs shown here expose a clearer picture of all that’s been going on. https://preview.redd.it/0tby6kl9pa0d1.jpg?width=2896&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=70a01d2f80443d9c86493ac09a2daae244333ed8 https://preview.redd.it/k9myp8cbpa0d1.jpg?width=2044&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cccaa91c95b5cc90517bb320620c47b9c7d04218 Now that my overjet+crooked smile have become inevitably noticeable for everyone around they’re finally offering me apparently appropriate treatment, which in general terms implies the extraction of some teeth and orthodontics for jaw and maxillar incisor accomodation, but I’m still not very confident if that will be enough to solve the problem. In fact, the results haven’t been sent to me directly and i don’t understand how to take the radiographs as a reference, neither have i had any explanation of which could be the precursors that led to these issues. Hell, i haven’t even been told where the problem specifically is. So..for now I’m trying to trace back lines with my early medical history to see if my past traumatologic injuries had anything to do with this, wondering if my jaw presents any signs of underdevelopment, or if it is more related to mouth breathing habits during childhood, etc. I’m looking forward to making an appointment with maxillofacial+orthodontic experts to get answers to these questions and guidance through the whole process, but i’d like to read whatever y’all have to tell to me about this first. Any advice, answers, suggestions, comments are welcome. I’d really appreciate them a lot. (also srry for my bad use of english, it’s not my native language) |
2024.05.14 03:26 Ririruro Where is Melinoë from?
[SPOILERS for dialogue Vs the final boss of HADES II]
I wish I remembered to take a screenshot of the interaction but I'm assuming time travel of some kind might be involved in the story now. Especially after some dialogue between Melinoë and Chronos where she says she's from a future of sorts.
Unless I'm reading into that conversation too much. Chronos does shut that idea down by stating how it's impossible to go back as time only moves forwards and since he is time, I'm inclined to believe him on that.
However, we know that Chronos' control/undertanding of time can be fallible through Magick as we learn an incantation that prevents him from resuming the game if you try to pause during his boss fight.
So with Melinoë being involved with Hecate and the witches of the crossroads, is it possible that Melinoë is indeed from the future?
I'm not fully sure of the strict timeline of events in the story. I believe it goes: Chronos escapes > Chronos takes over house of Hades > Hecate rescues infant Melinoë > Chronos begins war with Olympus > Grown up Melinoë is revealed to the Gods by Hermes > The start of the Game.
Even with that, we're not too sure of how long each of these individual events last. My main concern is how long the war between Chronos and the Gods of Olympus has lasted. After unlocking the surface and the City of Ephyra (which is just on the outskirts of the underworld/current domain of Chronos), I assumed Chronos' takeover has been a relatively recent event and based on dialogue with various Gods about going to Olympus, it doesn't seem like they've been locked in this conflict for a long lasting amount of time.
There's also details such as Melinoë being the only one who has aged considerably compared to her past self (family picture in her tent where she's an infant) but I guess this could be countered by most of the cast being divine, near ageless beings.
This leads me to believe that there's a possibility that when Hecate rescued Melinoë, they spent a long time training together, not getting involved with the ongoing battle for better or worse. Afterwards, through some witchcraft, Melinoë was sent back in time earlier during the battle where Chronos' forces are still relatively new and the Gods aren't exhausted by a prolonged conflict so they would have a greater advantage against the Titan of Time.
Just a theory though. There's other things that could go against it as well, such as the hints at Melinoë's past relationship with Icarus. Also, there might be additional dialogue that I've either missed or haven't seen yet. This is Hades after all, where there's just so many unique lines of dialogue. Hopefully, in future patches or when the full release of the game comes out, we'll know by then.
submitted by Ririruro to HadesTheGame [link] [comments]
I wish I remembered to take a screenshot of the interaction but I'm assuming time travel of some kind might be involved in the story now. Especially after some dialogue between Melinoë and Chronos where she says she's from a future of sorts.
Unless I'm reading into that conversation too much. Chronos does shut that idea down by stating how it's impossible to go back as time only moves forwards and since he is time, I'm inclined to believe him on that.
However, we know that Chronos' control/undertanding of time can be fallible through Magick as we learn an incantation that prevents him from resuming the game if you try to pause during his boss fight.
So with Melinoë being involved with Hecate and the witches of the crossroads, is it possible that Melinoë is indeed from the future?
I'm not fully sure of the strict timeline of events in the story. I believe it goes: Chronos escapes > Chronos takes over house of Hades > Hecate rescues infant Melinoë > Chronos begins war with Olympus > Grown up Melinoë is revealed to the Gods by Hermes > The start of the Game.
Even with that, we're not too sure of how long each of these individual events last. My main concern is how long the war between Chronos and the Gods of Olympus has lasted. After unlocking the surface and the City of Ephyra (which is just on the outskirts of the underworld/current domain of Chronos), I assumed Chronos' takeover has been a relatively recent event and based on dialogue with various Gods about going to Olympus, it doesn't seem like they've been locked in this conflict for a long lasting amount of time.
There's also details such as Melinoë being the only one who has aged considerably compared to her past self (family picture in her tent where she's an infant) but I guess this could be countered by most of the cast being divine, near ageless beings.
This leads me to believe that there's a possibility that when Hecate rescued Melinoë, they spent a long time training together, not getting involved with the ongoing battle for better or worse. Afterwards, through some witchcraft, Melinoë was sent back in time earlier during the battle where Chronos' forces are still relatively new and the Gods aren't exhausted by a prolonged conflict so they would have a greater advantage against the Titan of Time.
Just a theory though. There's other things that could go against it as well, such as the hints at Melinoë's past relationship with Icarus. Also, there might be additional dialogue that I've either missed or haven't seen yet. This is Hades after all, where there's just so many unique lines of dialogue. Hopefully, in future patches or when the full release of the game comes out, we'll know by then.
2024.05.14 03:25 Kenshin1296 [USA] [H] PSP Go, Gba, Ds Lite, 2ds, Kuon, Rule of Rose, SBK N64, Mario Kart DD, Nsmbw, The Last Story, WiiSportsR, One Piece PW4, DQ Builders, Mario Odyssey, Caligula Eff 1&2, THPS1&2 Etc) GB/Gba games, Pokemon Ranger 1-3, HOTD2, SFEX2 Plus, Intelligent Qube, Stella Dues, Blue Dragon [W] PP F&F
All items are FIRM in price and include shipping!
Will take $5 off each additional item purchased (Certain items including consoles or multi disk ps1 titles may may not be included depending on heaviness or other factors. Just check in with me and I'll lyk)
Everything is tested and fully working unless stated otherwise!!!
Consoles
N64
submitted by Kenshin1296 to GameSale [link] [comments]
Will take $5 off each additional item purchased (Certain items including consoles or multi disk ps1 titles may may not be included depending on heaviness or other factors. Just check in with me and I'll lyk)
Everything is tested and fully working unless stated otherwise!!!
Consoles
- $65 Glacier GBA Console (No battery back. Fully Functional) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/pR09ZkR844
- $55 Pink Ds Lite With Charger & Stylus (Charger not pictured but is official charger) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/1NQ8NTdT48
- $75 Black & Blue 2ds With Charger & Stylus (Rubber piece off thumbstick is starting to come undone a bit. No other issues besides that https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/m1717w87q1
- $160 Psp Go With Charger (Has Games Like Smash Bros Remix, Dragon Ball Z Kart (MK64 Mod) Marvel Vs Capcom etc Downloaded https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/YQ1DY4bUHn
N64
- $10 NBA Live 99 & Madden 99 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/2f0E0tmDW7
- $35 Snowboard Kids https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/u6eHE9s78r
- $65 Mario Kart Double Dash https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/S2g96oe1w0
- $25 Nsmb Wii (No Manual) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/7toGYT0H2b
- $65 The Last Story https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/4b42hBVt58
- $30 Wii Sports Resort https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/K9R2Km830C
- $60 Dragon Quest Builders https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/D5o3BXi8uN
- $15 Lego Marvel Superheroes 2 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/718w61Mj35
- $12 Mario Rabbids Kingdom Battle (Cart Only) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/97H5VuF05U
- $15 Monster Hunter Rise (Cart Only) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/rQGdihP21d
- $45 One Piece Pirate Warriors 4 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/yHd71a181E
- $15 Power Rangers Battle For The Grid (Cart Only) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/04985Q3muM
- $15 Shin Megami Tensei III https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/oUy8s1A3EH
- $18 Splatoon 2 (Cart Only) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/3bL9802185
- $35 Super Mario Odyssey https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/21z812752
- $160 The Caligula Effect Overdose Limited Edition https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/01r838h8AN
- $35 The Caligula Effect 2 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/4139f2N1za
- $20 Tony Hawk Pro Skater 1&2 (Cart Only) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/RD25gsv24X
- $8 Baseball Gameboy https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/L2ZgZA6FFT
- $30 Donkey Kong Original https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/DU922X9N9o
- $10 Dr Mario https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/4N529zHrQ4
- $10 Game & Watch Gallery 3 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/0eA9pugB3N
- $15 Kirby's Pinball Land https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/L4d5i51505
- $10 NBA Jam https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/03E98S2x1G
- $9 Super Battletank https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/HpgH03N5b3
- $8 Beyblade V Force https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/979xoDmznt
- $20 Mega Man Battle Network 6 Gregar https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/u24M309011
- $8 Midnight Club https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/t14E845101
- $8 SpongeBob Lights Camera Pants https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/80s1f8AzbZ
- $9 The Legend of Spyro A New Beginning https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/vgiLX1PbM4
- $12 Diddy Kong Racing Ds Cart Only https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/73een4611n
- $17 Donkey Kong Jungle Climber (Cart Only) https://flic.kp/2pFKJBC
- $30 Dragon Ball Origins (Cart Only) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/7wegJ7e521
- $20 Pokemon Ranger (Cart Only) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/966M2Nq008
- $50 Pokemon Ranger Shadows of Almia https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/352Nr0sB11
- $60 Pokemon Ranger Guardian Signs https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/85Py743651
- $23 Yugioh World Championship 2010 (Cart Only) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/ES6M3EU63H
- $13 Monster Hunter Generations https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/6dU1Hp5fqZ
- $23 Paper Mario Sticker Star https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/n0k7114c39
- $28 Pokemon Rumble Blast https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/o70w85W562
- $35 House of The Dead 2 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/QTcpXUH2E2
- $40 Intelligent Cube https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/08WAo10hs7
- $80 Street Fighter EX2 Plus https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/WB8K9pi0pz
- $890 Kuon https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/oZaZesy159
- $650 Rule of Rose https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/93529vA82m
- $15 Final Fantasy Dirge Of Cerberus Disk Only https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/ri45672o13
- $25 Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy (No Manual) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/yeFRq7i594
- $15 Star Trek Voyager Elite Force https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/Bvt8PZDh25
- $45 Stella Deus ( No Manual ) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/6nP8624KJV
- $15 Ultimate Marvel Vs Capcom 3 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/a338Q48jrT
- $9 Destiny 1 & 2 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/732e891951
- $9 Dragon Ball Xenoverse https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/PVdW62T41a
- $15 Guitar Hero Live https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/2062ThPftv
- $9 Plants Vs Zombies Garden Warfare 2 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/U1mp6Rqbam
- $8 Star Wars Battlefront https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/9U5e2H27J3
- $10 Lego Star Wars Ep 2 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/4Md1R76T11
- $30 Manhunt 2 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/hT7fJ04535
- $15 Final Fantasy X/X-2 Cart Only https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/0Sw1EY335N
- $10 Tony Hawk Pro Skater 4 https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/H90x348647
- $20 Voodoo Vince https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/4hT7S6940n
- $35 Sealed Ace Combat 6 (Game is sealed however there is a slit in the wrapper down the middle plus another piece next to it that is peeling off/can be pulled back) https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/V3yW975G1H
- $45 Blue Dragon bit of sun fading https://www.flickr.com/photos/193718836@N02/shares/8Z6Ts0sp82
2024.05.14 03:20 thedumbestdummy514 Multiple positives, too early?
 | (Reposting with pictures) submitted by thedumbestdummy514 to lineporn [link] [comments] Hey everyone, this is my first time posting here and if my test truly means I'm pregnant then this would be my first pregnancy. My period is in 5-6 days and l've been feeling really weird the past week or so. I ended up taking a first response, early result digital test and it popped positive, saying "yes+". I then took a rapid result test about 15-20 minutes later and it popped positive as well. My partner and I bought one more pack of early results tests, in which I took that one and it was positive as well. My friend ended up taking me to the ER so I could get a blood test to see if there was HCG in my blood or if I had false positives. The doctor argued with me and told me that tests can look positive once they sit out too long, he didn't seem to care when I told him it literally popped positive in front of my eyes. I saw both lines develop and I saw the yes pop up. He refused to give me a blood test and instead opted for a urine test, in which it came back negative. He was very rude to me and dismissive of all of my question. My friend bought me another pack of tests since it didn't sit well with me that my tests were negative and they both were positive as well. Am I crazy or am I actually pregnant? I'm not technically late yet but that's 5 positive tests today. I do plan to get it confirmed somehow but I don't have insurance and in order to get insurance in my state while pregnant, I have to have confirmation from a doctor. I know it might seem crazy to want confirmation with 5 positives but the way that doctor dismissed me made me feel crazy. |
2024.05.14 03:20 ksteve46 Silph Co Rival Gets Schemed and Owned! (4.0 Normal MGM/care package Nuzlocke)
 | Apologies in advance - this will be a long post as I am amped up right now! submitted by ksteve46 to pokemonradicalred [link] [comments] I am doing a hardcore nuzlocke of 4.0 (because the AI changes of 4.1 were too frustrating to plan against) and in all of my attempts and prior nuzlockes I had NEVER been completely stumped on how to win like I was for the Silph Co Rival’s blastoise team. I usually always go water starter but went for incineroar this time so this would be my first run up against the blastoise line … This team has WAY more set up potential than the other two rival teams. Understanding how much this AI loves to set up and use status moves, Swords dance kingambit, Jolly/aerilate/sharp beak/swords dance/sleep powdedouble-edge jumpluff, shell smash/mega launcher mega-blastoise are all potential run-killers. Sheer force/life orb Darmanitan and sharp beak staraptor can also hit HARD. My box at this point (3rd picture) was NOT very good for this. I was very prepared to lose some soldiers in this fight and potentially the run altogether. Most of my mons were slower than everyone but kingambit and many of the mons that could be faster than jumpluff like mienshao, accelgor, zoroark, and espeon just would not be able to get in safely and kill before being killed. I planned for TWO DAYS and we seemed destined to meet our end. Or so I thought … The plan I finally found was not so simple, but we not only found our only way out of the fight with this strategy … we made it out DEATHLESS. But it was not without several risks along the way … The team: The Lead - Our potentially AI manipulating Houdini, Bold/Static/Magnet Ampharos with Volt Switch, Thunderbolt, Thunder Wave, and Confuse Ray The Sweeper - Timid/Adaptability/Silk Scarf Pyroar with Flamethrower, Hyper Voice, Hyper Beam, and Noble Roar The Queen’s Gambit - Adamant/Iron Fist/No Item Pangoro with Knock Off, Bullet Punch, Parting Shot, and Hammer Arm The Wall - Adamant/Sturdy/Occa Berry Steelix with Protect, Toxic, Stealth Rock, and Earthquake The Plushy - Impish/Huge PoweSitrus Berry Azumarill with Aqua Tail, Aqua Jet, Toxic, and Bulldoze The Pivot Gambler - Careful/Emergency Exit/Loaded Dice Golisopod with Liquidation, Sucker Punch, First Impression, and Pin Missile The Plan: Ampharos was set to volt switch the staraptor. There were two possibilities from an AI standpoint because I don’t fully understand hard switch AI. Either staraptor hard switches to Jumpluff because it’s the fastest mon remaining that isn’t 2HKO by Ampharos OR staraptor stays in, close combats for about 30%, and dies while Ampharos leaves battle. If it was a hard switch to jumpluff, volt switch would do just enough so that Pyroar could come in and outspeed and kill with flamethrower without ever taking damage. If staraptor stays in and dies, the AI will send in whatever mon best matches up with my choice from a speed and defensive standpoint. EITHER WAY, if I choose pyroar after the volt switch, with pyroar at full health, the remaining mons all are outsped and at best 2HKO by pyroar making them all equally likely to come in after the kill. This leads to a random selection which almost dooms us if it’s blastoise vs pyroar, and certainly dooms pyroar if I try to hit the high roll hyper beam. What follows turns out to be a dream scenario: Staraptor stays in and dies to volt switch, I choose pyroar with a 25% chance for blastoise to come in with tons of backup and ruin this run with shell smash. Played to the outs and was rewarded with a random KINGAMBIT … OHKO with flamethrower. 33% chance for blastoise now. Played to the outs and was rewarded with a random JUMPLUFF … OHKO with flamethrower 50% chance for blastoise now. Played to the outs and was rewarded with a random DARMANITAN Switch to azumarill who tanks a rock slide, aqua jets it well under half, tanks a U-turn (since it knew it was dead to priority) procking the sitrus berry, bringing in blastoise. At 145 HP, blastoise needed two shell smashes to have a range to kill azumarill. It was my best defensive option. On the first, I toxic. On the second, I bulldoze. It’s just under 50%. Another bulldoze + 3/16 from toxic should kill after the defense drops, but I’m not positive on that and I could die first from a high roll water pulse. Switching saves no one. Risking the plushy for the sake of the run, I click bulldoze. The water pulse does not roll high and I live on 5 HP BUT GET CONFUSED! The Plushy not only hits through the confusion but CRITS THE BULLDOZE TO KILL THE +4 SpA blastoise! Darmanitan comes back out. It’s now a random move. I switch to golisopod so he can either live and sucker punch for the kill or be ejected out to pyroar who can close with a fast hyper voice. Golisopod is hit with a weak EQ and sucker punch seals the deal! An insane stretch of luck, sure, but after two days of planning and having every mon survive, I am PUMPED for the team and had to share with you all the events, even if no one reads :) Have a wonderful night everyone!! |
2024.05.14 03:18 jikageeker About Kidd vs Shanks (and reader bias)
ever since that fated day back in chapter 1079 (if im remembering correctly, itd be lowk embrassing if i mixed this up), kid has been (more than ever) mocked as useless. i mean, he didnt even TOUCH shanks, wow: he's ASSSS😭
but i think his confrontation w the red-haired yonko is often misunderstood. and would reflect much better on kidd if people cared to consider his character.
imagine you're eustass 'captain' kid: three-billion-berri man who just helped take down an emperor of the sea after a prolonged raid on the base of ANOTHER emperor of the sea. to get here, youve bled, youve cried -- but damn it, youve FOUGHT. through droves of kaido's fodder, up and up and up to the setting of ROOF PIECE. u did alright, all's considered: off to a new adventure!
why, look here: an island...elbaph? red-haired shanks you say? the bastard whose right-hand man took your...well...left hand (and most of the arm with it?) well, hell, you're MUCH stronger than you were when that happened. in fact, you've fought TWO yonko.
alright alright ill cut the theatrics, but fr -- think about it as kidd would. he's fought two yonko and lived to laugh about it: a feat FEW other pirates can claim. so when approaching shanks' allied ships, it wouldnt be much of a surprise for kidd to treat it much like he did onigashima: there's a structure to this. beat some low-bounty nonames for about 20, maybe thirty minutes, work your way up to the named enforcers like, idk, rockstar -- after you beat HIM (which lets be fr kidd washes rockstar no matter what) work up to monster, bonk punch maybe -- yo throw in LIMEJUICE. you punk gibson up the chain of command to, well, the senior officers - then finally the chief himself.
kidd, at this point, never fought shanks. not head on: the aforementioned senior officers got to him before he could. so you could argue he doesnt know how shanks differs from kaido or big mom: that's he's mister 'you can piss in my beer n thats fine w me but hurt my friends and it's my fist you'll meet😡' but i wouldnt be surpised if kidd took what he learned from wano and applied it to fighting shanks: he took confidence both in his gained experience AND strength (letting off a damned punk because he assumed nobody would be strong enough to interrupt him). was this overconfidence on kidd's part? he's an overconfident man, for sure. but that doesnt neccesarily make him wrong.
because, let's face it, kidd couldve lasted longer if shanks didnt catch him by surprise. kidd pulled up thinking he could use his awakening, and developing understanding of his conquerors to put up a fight. and, honestly? who's to say he couldnt. would he win? that isnt my argument. all i'm saying is i doubt shanks has the durability of big mom ORRR the endurance of kaido. but kidd was blitzed, caught unaware in a compromising position (damned punk doesnt really give him a lot of room to defend himself) -- kidd wasnt EXPECTING to fight shanks at the shore. he was high off wano: in his head he'd come face to face with shanks after storming the island and boxing a giant or two!
people (fans) dont like kidd, be it cause of agenda or cause they genuinely dont gaf about his character. kidd's a comedic punching bag. kidd messes up? idiot! (which, like, he is but in a GOOD way trust me) kidd loses a fight? FRAUD! when engaging w their consumption of the manga, they read with bias. we ALL do. but i feel as if some people refuse, or perhaps fail, to engage with kidd as a character earnestly, to give him a shot due to this. they fail to consider his outlined traits and flaws, his established patterns and behaviours. when kidd loses a fight it's cause he's dumb asf n cant fight for shit, end of.
but we know that's a diminutive reading.
kid's a smart man, i dont think you can argue against this. even if he decides against his (or killer's) better judgement, if he acts against his best interest: he's a billion-berri captain of a crew ALMOST as small (in numbers) as the straw-hats. you dont have to like him to acknowledge his competence. he's an engineering whiz with an obvious aptitude for on-the-fly thinking in battle. so then u gotta ask: did kidd set himself up to lose? #isHEstupid? should he have thought about shanks differently, prepared? did some recon? tried to use a bit of observation haki? sure, maybe, whatever -- but that aint kidd. that wasnt EVER how he was gonna do things. cause doing things his way (with SOME compromises) is what's gotten him this far: that's the man, the pirate he is. he's an idiot, sure - as much as law or luffy. it's a part of his charm and what attracts me to his character: he isnt a perfect pirate (nor would i want him to be), he's an emotional character. because without his flaws and motivations, without the ability to rush into battle (especially one as personal as this) reason be damned (fafafafa) -- it wouldnt be kid. HE wouldnt be kid.
it's best to read his confrontation with shanks as a reminder: he aint there yet. but like when kaido bodyslammed him from the heavens, or when beckman shot off (? seriously, what did he do, we've never seen him fire a bullet) his arm: TRUSSSSTTT that he'll get back up. because captain kidd is the kind of man to keep getting back up: not cause he's just that cool, or just that strong: but because that's who he IS.
or like he dies off screen n we never see him again who knows😯☝🤔
submitted by jikageeker to kiddpiece [link] [comments]
but i think his confrontation w the red-haired yonko is often misunderstood. and would reflect much better on kidd if people cared to consider his character.
imagine you're eustass 'captain' kid: three-billion-berri man who just helped take down an emperor of the sea after a prolonged raid on the base of ANOTHER emperor of the sea. to get here, youve bled, youve cried -- but damn it, youve FOUGHT. through droves of kaido's fodder, up and up and up to the setting of ROOF PIECE. u did alright, all's considered: off to a new adventure!
why, look here: an island...elbaph? red-haired shanks you say? the bastard whose right-hand man took your...well...left hand (and most of the arm with it?) well, hell, you're MUCH stronger than you were when that happened. in fact, you've fought TWO yonko.
alright alright ill cut the theatrics, but fr -- think about it as kidd would. he's fought two yonko and lived to laugh about it: a feat FEW other pirates can claim. so when approaching shanks' allied ships, it wouldnt be much of a surprise for kidd to treat it much like he did onigashima: there's a structure to this. beat some low-bounty nonames for about 20, maybe thirty minutes, work your way up to the named enforcers like, idk, rockstar -- after you beat HIM (which lets be fr kidd washes rockstar no matter what) work up to monster, bonk punch maybe -- yo throw in LIMEJUICE. you punk gibson up the chain of command to, well, the senior officers - then finally the chief himself.
kidd, at this point, never fought shanks. not head on: the aforementioned senior officers got to him before he could. so you could argue he doesnt know how shanks differs from kaido or big mom: that's he's mister 'you can piss in my beer n thats fine w me but hurt my friends and it's my fist you'll meet😡' but i wouldnt be surpised if kidd took what he learned from wano and applied it to fighting shanks: he took confidence both in his gained experience AND strength (letting off a damned punk because he assumed nobody would be strong enough to interrupt him). was this overconfidence on kidd's part? he's an overconfident man, for sure. but that doesnt neccesarily make him wrong.
because, let's face it, kidd couldve lasted longer if shanks didnt catch him by surprise. kidd pulled up thinking he could use his awakening, and developing understanding of his conquerors to put up a fight. and, honestly? who's to say he couldnt. would he win? that isnt my argument. all i'm saying is i doubt shanks has the durability of big mom ORRR the endurance of kaido. but kidd was blitzed, caught unaware in a compromising position (damned punk doesnt really give him a lot of room to defend himself) -- kidd wasnt EXPECTING to fight shanks at the shore. he was high off wano: in his head he'd come face to face with shanks after storming the island and boxing a giant or two!
people (fans) dont like kidd, be it cause of agenda or cause they genuinely dont gaf about his character. kidd's a comedic punching bag. kidd messes up? idiot! (which, like, he is but in a GOOD way trust me) kidd loses a fight? FRAUD! when engaging w their consumption of the manga, they read with bias. we ALL do. but i feel as if some people refuse, or perhaps fail, to engage with kidd as a character earnestly, to give him a shot due to this. they fail to consider his outlined traits and flaws, his established patterns and behaviours. when kidd loses a fight it's cause he's dumb asf n cant fight for shit, end of.
but we know that's a diminutive reading.
kid's a smart man, i dont think you can argue against this. even if he decides against his (or killer's) better judgement, if he acts against his best interest: he's a billion-berri captain of a crew ALMOST as small (in numbers) as the straw-hats. you dont have to like him to acknowledge his competence. he's an engineering whiz with an obvious aptitude for on-the-fly thinking in battle. so then u gotta ask: did kidd set himself up to lose? #isHEstupid? should he have thought about shanks differently, prepared? did some recon? tried to use a bit of observation haki? sure, maybe, whatever -- but that aint kidd. that wasnt EVER how he was gonna do things. cause doing things his way (with SOME compromises) is what's gotten him this far: that's the man, the pirate he is. he's an idiot, sure - as much as law or luffy. it's a part of his charm and what attracts me to his character: he isnt a perfect pirate (nor would i want him to be), he's an emotional character. because without his flaws and motivations, without the ability to rush into battle (especially one as personal as this) reason be damned (fafafafa) -- it wouldnt be kid. HE wouldnt be kid.
it's best to read his confrontation with shanks as a reminder: he aint there yet. but like when kaido bodyslammed him from the heavens, or when beckman shot off (? seriously, what did he do, we've never seen him fire a bullet) his arm: TRUSSSSTTT that he'll get back up. because captain kidd is the kind of man to keep getting back up: not cause he's just that cool, or just that strong: but because that's who he IS.
or like he dies off screen n we never see him again who knows😯☝🤔