33M, caucasian, non-smoker, social drinker, history of SVT with overall low risk factors. Currently taking Pantapropozole, Carvidolol, Multivitamin, Iron, Miralax. I'll attempt to make this short-winded and hope this counts as appropriate for this subreddit!. Around ~August 2023, I suddenly started having random spikes/drops in my sugar levels, as well as fatigue and notable weight loss (40 pounds over 4 1/2 months). My previous PCP started the workup and over the next ~3 months, I was in and out of hospital admissions/countless doctor visits. Over this time I started to develop more symptoms, most notably night sweats, increasing GI issues, and worsening fatigue/tiredness.
Because the symptoms were mostly non-specific, I had pretty broad, general workups with few things off (my hemoglobin dropped several points in November then slowly recouped back to 15.5. Saw a hematologist and he basically just said "you had a bleed, it clotted off and now you're recovering. If it drops again come back to me"). Full body CT w/contrast, MRI of spine/brain, colonoscopy/endoscopy, spinal tap, echo, CPX, countless blood tests which I would fail to mention all of, but including endocrine/rheumatological and autoimmune markers, as well as viral potential causes.
At some point in December my gp basically threw his hands up and said "we don't have anything to work with, the few abnormal things are recovering". Fast forward to February, I end up in the ER with severe nausea and a dull pain below my lower left rib cage. They do a repeat CT and mention that my spleen is still "minimally enlarged" but there are no noticable masses, and my liver is "no longer slightly enlarged". These are two things I was never told about, I suppose because they felt they weren't significant enough? But made me realize I needed another opinion/better guidance. The radiologist also noted on the report that I had "mild haziness near the mesenteric root of the pancreas level", but "pancreas unremarkable otherwise" as well as normal lymph nodes in the area. He recommended checking for pancreatitis and/or mesenteritis.
I go into a new GP in March. She's fantastic - extremely thorough and importantly doesn't immediately try to blame this all on the easy things. She gets me into GI and hematology (had another GI doctor but she wanted me to get another opinion, as the old one basically said your colonoscopy/egd are normal, come back in 7 years). Hematology came first, and he basically said objectively, you acutely then chronically bled, used up all your iron stores which caused excess fatigue (fatigue/tiredness is still a primary issue for me but is substantially better than a month ago when I started iron supplementation) and now you're recouping. We can do a bone marrow biopsy or a PET scan, but I can tell you what they will show: nothing. I asked about the spleen/livemesentery involvement and he just said "your blood work and scans show no sign of a mass, if malignancy were making you this symptomatic, it would be more obvious and you wouldn't have seen any improvement. In addition your liver has reduced in size and your spleen is still barely enlarged with no signs of mass, malignancy doesn't act this way".
I leave the visit at least more optimistic about the situation, but still feeling awful and like this is some type of GI related malignancy that's killing me, frankly. (As a side note, symptoms became so problematic that I had to stop working full time which has obviously been another stresser during all of this).
Then the GI visit comes (about 2 weeks ago now at this point). We go over everything and he just basically says "let's skip the MRI and go for a pillcam to get a closer look at your small intestines, and an endoscopic ultrasound to take a closer look at your pancreas and this inflamed part of your mesentery". Sounds great to me! I know people go years looking for a diagnosis sometimes, but the last 8 months have been the most exhausting/stressful/longest of my life and he seemed adamant about getting to the bottom of this.
Here's where my concern/question comes in: back in December in my last hospital admission, the hospitalist asked what I thought this may be. I pretty quickly said PC, because of the way things progressed and the initial, non-specific symptoms + sugar issues (which seem to have mostly gotten better? I've also regained 30 pounds since, which is a "good" sign I know). He kind of laughed and just said "your pancreas has been imaged and looked at twice by two separate radiologists and neither saw anything to worry about" (this was before the February scan showing mesentery involvement). I kind of gave up on that idea/worry for a long time because of the assured way he answered my concern over it, but now I've got it in my head that that's what has been the culprit all this time and have been told CT's miss signs of PC pretty frequently, and the mesentery/spleen findings are a result of pancreatic tail or body involvement that's spread, which the GI did mention it was unlikely to be in the head as you'd almost certainly see bile duct involvement/jaundice evidence at this point, or the classic pale/clay stools, which I haven't had.
I know there is pretty strong evidence to this point to suggest it isn't a pancreatic tumor, given 3 contrast CT's now over 9 months with no sign of it, improvement in some symptoms (night sweats are virtually gone, fatigue is significantly better), some of the more obvious/common symptoms not being there, like the stool/jaundice, but instinctively this just feels like the right place to look. I'm not terrified of a diagnosis at this point, but I'm absolutely mortified that this is going to get worse before I have the chance to even figure out what it is because of the things that have continued to worsen (nausea/malaise in the morning especially, tiredness/dyspnea... Well, the dyspnea has improved since the iron supplementation as well, but considering I could get up and run five miles 9 months ago and now a small flight of stairs whip me...). The idea of losing ~6 months of valuable time if I'd pushed this concern harder back in December is also a hard pill to swallow. Speaking of, the pillcam is Thursday, and the EUS is the 28th. I tried to move it up but they are booked out (I feel like I they suspected pancreatic cancer they would have got me in sooner as well) and I don't want to push it anymore in the case that it isn't that, and I potentially take someone's spot that needs it before I do. I guess I'm asking for someone to talk me off this ledge and trust that something obvious wasn't missed, or even recommend I continue to push this as maybe it sounds like a familiar situation someone has witnessed in the past where it ended up being something like PC. I think I've mentally accepted almost every potential outcome of this situation except for that one, which likely has to do with me being intimately familiar with what it looked like in the end for a friend.
That was... Long-winded. Sorry, I tried haha. I wish you all the best of health moving forward!

This is on mobile & this more about one of my sisters. Clarity I’m the youngest in the family & have disabilities & am adopted from a country that’s not well known in the west to avoid too many details.
Backstory: She had these details about me over my head all my life. “I’m not American enough, I’m not Asian (my heritage enough) I’m not smart enough”, etc. She traveled to my birth country and would withhold any information on my heritage from me and gaslight me whenever I tried to ask questions when I was young. Like “oh be specific, what do you mean what food they eat? What do you mean what their history is be specific” until I’d get frustrated and have to walk away. So ya she’s awful. Summer (2022) on a family visit, I’m their favorite aunt. Been told by all my siblings kids. It was a week’s stay and I had successfully dodged my sister’s attempts in starting a fight until somehow in a conversation of economics. Don’t ask I don’t know how either I was once again called a retard & her eldest kid used as an example to ridicule me further on how stupid I was & how smart her kid is in front of my silent parents. She then turned to my utter shock to her eldest child & used her younger sibling to ridicule her on how much better she could do in school. In my head I went “AH HELL NO” (that’s where it officially began.) I SNAPPED. After more insults heels at me I started to cry. I’m not a cryer. So much so it throws me off when others cry because I guess I forget that’s a thing? Karen my entitled sister was absolutely BEAMING with pride and utter euphoric JOY. Again my parents still silent heads down. Shortly after that we had to leave for the airport. I WAS DONE. Given I’d do & this was my “snapping point” it’s really not too bad in my opinion.
Now onto the PETTY REVENGE.
Christmas 2022, I mailed my gifts to my narcissistic sister & later she called & disowned me. The utter relief that drained from my body was HEAVENLY. I sent her kids “Sorry My Mom’s a Karen” t-shirts I got off Amazon as a petty joke for Christmas, along said actually gifts. I thought it was hilarious and to anyone outside the family I tell this story to agrees it’s funny. Outraged on the phone I did try to explain why I sent the gifts instead of straight up apologizing first because that’s just how my brain functions. It’s not excusing it. It’s just making sense of things. A recap on what happened that lead up as a nice way to have a straightforward what happened from my perspective to give more clarity. I’m called heartless & evil. That was the Holidays and since then my parents have even admitted they know it was messed up & hovered over me declaring me unfeeling. According to my narcissistic sis I’m “an evil bitch”. I finally said okay & apologized to appease my mother. I figured it was a great acting exercise. I admitted that to my mother and she was not amused. She’s the type who just wants everyone to get along. Unsurprisingly my entitle sis said “it wasn’t good enough” & I said “that’s her problem”. I was called immature, stubborn & clearly need intense anger management…over shirts according to my sister. Questioning my sanity really her and my mom. “How could I do such a thing?” I remember thinking “Dude I got disowned over shirts”. Like wow she didn’t just prove my point. I’m setting boundaries, told her and my family regardless what they think I won’t let them make me the bad guy because I’m not. They were pissed. Whilst all this was happening I was planning on going off to uni, so I was gonna be gone anyways. I know my parents just want peace & are good people but are too old & don’t need to be dealing with their two adult children’s problems. I kept telling my mom she’s not responsible for her grown children’s problems. That it’s not her fault & that it’s between me and my sister. Of course my sister isn’t mature and demanded she fix it and make me realize how awful I am blah blah blah.
Ya I could have let it go but disownment is a bit of an overkill but I’m too relieved to care? She’s since then tried to convince our parents to take my education away. They shut that down, thank God. She even tried to convince them to throw me onto the streets. It was like this for roughly four months until I realized I was fighting my own battle this long & enough was enough. I contacted another family member knowing they’d contact my mom asking what’s going on? Embarrassed my mom came storming in asking why was I sharing our family business? I looked at her “why? Why? What’s a middle aged woman doing trying to ruin the life of (insert my age) year old?” Stunned I think that’s when she finally realized it was over and she gave up. After that I was left alone. By March I think Karen realized I’m not budging & she couldn’t take it? So her last tactic (which didn’t work) was saying parents couldn’t see their grandkids unless I apologized. I’ve admitted to my parents the fallowing “Yes, I messed up by sending those petty gifts to unsuspecting kids. That’s fair. However how is sending petty shirts like that be so much worse than the abuse they’ve let me endure from my much older sister? Whatever. At the very least I deserve a tongue lashing. Which I got but not months of continued “you’re heartless” BS. Sorry if this was a long read but that’s been my story so far. I’m living my life, keeping a healthy distance because I love my family but I’m also not a pushover. I’ve been blocked by Karen naturally. My Parents spent years beaten down by her despite the good life and support she’s been given by our parents. They’re just as much as victims as I am. My petty revenge continues as I live my life feeling more & more powerful & FREE. I even met people at my university from my country and finally got answers not even the internet was helpful on. I was finally able to reclaimed my own heritage. Around Christmas time 2023 I had an unplanned & surprising conversation on FaceTime with my nieces! As expected they don’t care about what happened & they still love me. My BIL is chill & likely & probably wisely is staying out of it. Also my parents have been getting therapy and doing better. They’re victims & adults. So what they do is their choice. Thankfully I have seen improvements. They’re good people.
The CHERRY ONTOP :
I realized somewhere in August 2023 that I was the first person in her life that told her no, showed she had no control over me. What’s worse (for her) of all people it’s the Asian retard who walked away head held high & couldn’t give any less about her. That. Is. Power. Now I believe to cope she lives her life as if nothing happened but keeps the “banishment” and honestly good for her. I am happy healthy & thriving. I WON.

(Trigger warning for pedophilia, existentialism and self harm)
I (21m) have been struggling with pedophilic disturbances in one form or another since my pre-teens (I think it really started when I was maybe 11?) beginning in the form of feeling guilt and uncertainty for feeling attraction to my own peers when I was in middle school. I know now that developing sexual urges and desires is normal, but I didn’t know it back then, and I thought I was breaking the law for even thinking of girls in a sexual way. Nobody told me it was normal/okay, and a typical part of teenage development. I just assumed it was illegal.
It wasn’t until high school that I became brave enough to start asking questions and seeking answers, and actually learning for the first time that it was okay for teenagers like then-14yo me to have sexual desires, and that highschoolers actually regularly have sex with each other, and don’t face legal repercussions, contrary to what I used to believe. I genuinely thought teenagers having sex was just a baseless movie trope and nothing else.
However, I was still stuck in the mindset I had back in middle school—that it was illegal, disrespectful, evil, etc. to have sexual attraction at such a young age, especially towards girls my age (minors at the time). I was, almost piously, stuck clinging to that mindset. And the new information I had gathered—from other 14-18yo girls, mind you—was rather abrupt in my developmental timeline. So there was a lot of conflict between this new information, and my outdated “thou shalt not goon” ideology.
It was also around high school that I began noticing the budding sprouts of my disorders beginning to manifest, whose seeds were planted all the way back in middle school. I started to notice—though at the time, couldn’t fully comprehend or articulate—that even though I was growing up, my sexual attraction wasn’t, and I still found middle schoolers attractive. I kept thinking it was just a series of intrusive thoughts and kept pushing it down. Early on in high school, I looked at the 3-year legal age gap with minors, and thought I could force myself to stop being attracted to girls who were younger than 3 years below me. I kept doing mental compulsions, trying to force it away. Each year I got older, I would try to convince myself to stop being attracted to another age group. Alas, it did not work like I hoped it would, and hebephebophilia continues to plague my brain to this day.
Between the middle of high school to a little after graduation, I was in a state of denial. My 3-year age gap rule was expired when I turned 17 (also, I didn’t realize how wrong that rule was for such young kids, but now I know that much narrower age gaps are more correct). So, for the following years, I just kept pushing it all further and further down. Denying I had what I had. After all, it goes against my moral. My ethical code. My philosophies. How could I possibly have something encoded in my mind, that is so antithetical to my values? Of course, bottling it up didn’t help. Throughout my latter teenage years, I was left frequently confused and distressed. And I was always worried that if I let myself analyze my condition, even just a little bit, I’d be put on a watchlist and arrested soon after.
It wasn’t until I went to an OCD clinic for my contamination OCD, that I found other people with the same issues I was facing, and that I wasn’t going to get locked up for addressing my pedophilic disorders. I finally began unboxing years of bottled up torment, pondering how it all came to be, and formulating theories on why I have this curse, this disease. Trying to make sense of it all.
Of course, even though I’ve had some breathing room handed to me on a silver platter, it’s still a pair of chronic disorders. I’m still reeling from all those years spent hiding from myself and from the world (the latter of which I’m still mostly doing). And still figuring out how to cope with my condition, in the present and the future. I’ve had suicidal thoughts and intentions because of my disorder. And these suicidal thoughts still manifest in the maladaptive daydreams I have, conjuring up scenarios in my mind where I end myself due to the guilt and shame I feel. I’m physically unable to enact a successful suicide attempt, due to my low pain tolerance, my existential fear of death (ironically) and the way my body automatically freezes and shuts down in times of heavy distress.
I want to be able to tell my friends and most of my family about my disorder. But it’s incredibly risky to do. I feel like I’m lying to them, deceiving them, by keeping my secret. And I feel trapped, and that telling more people will expand this little prison cell in my mind, making it more breathable and livable, as it has done so far with the therapists and friends I’ve made from the clinic. But I know how emotionally charged pedophilia is. I, for one, feel so much violent rage and distraught grief whenever I hear that some monster has decided to violate a child. And I know that would be the first thought to enter someone’s mind. I know that anyone I tell is prone to developing any series of misunderstandings, misinterpretations.
Even though I’ve never inflicted any degree of sexual harm to a child and never will, the simple fact that I have pedophilic disorder is enough to ravage my mind with guilt and shame. I find myself hoping I don’t live past my 30’s or 40’s because of it.
Violating anyone is a conscious choice, and I’ve always been confident in the fact that it’s a choice I will never make. Still, the sensations, thoughts and feelings that develop in my mind make it difficult for me to live with myself, regardless of the fact that it’ll only ever stay in my mind.

3.4. Mahishasaka or Sarvāstivādis

[wisdomlib.org:] [Mahishasaka had the doctrines] similar to those of the Mahasanghika. [Mahishasaka] denied reality to past and future, but maintained the reality of the present. Similarly, the school rejected the doctrine of the void and the non ego, the production of taint by the Five consciousness, the theory of nine kinds of non activity, and so on. They held that enlightenment came suddenly rathern than gradually.

Mahasamghika split from the Sthaviravāda (Theravada or Dhamma-Vinaya) and produced many schools.

According to the Theravādin Dīpavaṃsa, the Sarvāstivādins emerged from the older Mahīśāsaka school, but the Śāriputraparipṛcchā and the Samayabhedoparacanacakra state that the Mahīśāsaka emerged from the Sarvāstivāda. [Sarvastivada (wiki)]

Some Vajjian monks, who were possibly the followers of Devadatta, established the Mahasamghika after the schism after rejecting ten Vinaya rules. Like a few other monks, a Vajjian monk complained about the Vinaya rules. The story is recorded in Vajjiputta Sutta, which was utilised to support an argument that the Dhamma-Vinaya tradition added new rules. Indeed, the Buddha, the founder of the Dhamma-Vinaya Sasana, added new rules as required. However, before His passing He let the monks remove the minor rules, but the monks kept all the 227 rules. Only some Vajjian monks once again attempted to remove ten rules and split the Sangha after their attempt failed. These rebel monks founded many schools that united into Mahayana. The Sarvāstivādis wrote many famous Mahayanist scriptures.

Gandhāran Mahīśāsakas are associated with the Pure Land teachings of Amitābha Buddha. [Seated Buddha Amitabha statue.jpg (wiki)]

• Mādhyamika Also known as: Śūnyavāda, Shunyavada, Encyclopaedia Britannica
• Sarvastivada Also known as: Sarvastivadin, Vaibhashika, Encyclopaedia Britannica

Mahāsaṅghikās revised the Dhamma and Vinaya in their own way. The revised collections were known as Ācariyavāda as distinguished from the Theravāda of the First Buddhist Council. Dīpavaṃsa says, that the Mahāsaṅghikās did not stop after changing the Vinaya rules. They went further by laying down for themselves new doctrines contrary to the established ones. They recited for their purposes the sūtras and Vinaya, they made alterations in the texts and their arrangements and interpretations.
There are four kinds of teachings, that can be accepted as the Buddha's words – sutta, suttānuloma, ācariyavāda, attanomati. In Parinibbāna Sutta there are other four kinds of teaching – Buddhāpadesa, Saṅghāpadesa, Sambahulattherāpadesa, Ekattherāpadesa. They are not contradicting each other.
They also replaced portions of the text by others according to their liking and even rejected certain parts of the canon though they have been accepted according to the tradition of Mahā Kassapa's council. They refused Parivāra and Abhidhamma Pakaraṇa, Paṭisambhidā, Niddesa and Jātaka.
Mahāsaṅghikās divided their canon into five parts: 1. Sūtra, 2. Vinaya, 3. Abhidhamma, 4. Miscellaneous, 5. Dhāranīs. [ Notes from BPU Sri Lanka - Third Year ]

According to Sibani Barman in Dipavamsa (study): Chapter 2d - The Third Buddhist Council,

the Vibhajjavādins claim that their theories and Canon are same as the original Sthaviras (the elders).

• But that statement is untruthful. Kaccānagotta Sutta is a living proof. This is explained in 3.3.

Sarvāstivādis Doctrines

[David Bastow. The first argument for Sarvastivada. Asian Philosophy Vol. 5 No. 2 Oct.1995 Pp.109-125 Copyright by Asian Philosophy]

[Bastow:] The argument is two-fold: that past states of mind can be directly perceived; and that the temporal and causal context of these states of mind, including their karmic future and the possibility of an alternative saving future, can also be directly perceived.

In demonstrating their belief, the Sarvāstivādis attacked, the Venerable Maugdalyayana in the Maugdalyayana-skandhaka, the first chapter of the Vijnanakaya (200 BCE?):

[Bastow:] The sramana Maugdalyayana says: The past and the future do not exist; the present and the unconditioned (asainskrta) exist.

• Atacked: Singled out a thera, ignored the Buddha, and attacked the Dhamma;
• The Venerable Maugdalyayana represents the Sakyamuni Buddha.
• The past is memory, not the present dhamma. The past as memory is perceived, not lived nor imagined. The past as perceived is not lived, but it was lived, so it can be perceived.
• The future is yet to be lived, so it cannot be perceived, but it can be planned, expected and imagined.

[Bastow:] Section 1: [The Sarvāstivādis argued based on] probably Anguttara Nikaya III section 69 (i.e. A i 201-3). "There are three akusala-mulani (roots of ill, roots leading to bad consequences). These are lobha, greed; dvesa, anger; and moha, confusion." From this agreed premise the argument proceeds, first taking the case of lobha. There is no doubt then that there has been, is, will be a seeing that lobha is akusala (otherwise translated: a seeing of akusala--presumably meaning akusala-dharmas--in or through lobha). The lobha that is thus seen--is it past, present or future? If it is past or future, then it must be admitted that past or future exist. So could it be present?

• Lobha (greed) which existed in the past does not exist now, nor will exist in the future. When the object that caused that state of mind dimished, that greed also dimished. For example, one ate a certain food with greed. After eating it, greed was replaced by another state of mind, sleepiness, which was about sleeping and delusion. Sleepiness is different from craving for food. One does not get sleepy for food.
• If the same greed were to exist until now, one must be greedy the same way one was greedy for that food. Then one must not have different states of mind, anger and delusion.
• Greed cannot liberate anyone from anger and delusion.
• If that greed and all other greed must exist right now, greed must be accumulating and becoming too much to handle.
• And there were times of anger and delusion.
• Can anyone proove they are suffering from all the greed, anger and delusion which they had in the past?

[Bastow:] To allow this would involve admitting that there are in one pudgala two simultaneous cittas, states of consciousness; but this cannot be admitted. However, there must be seeing of either past lobha, or future lobha, or present lobha; otherwise it could not be that someone sees that lobha, akusalamula, is akusala. And in that case it would not happen that someone becomes repelled by lobha, detached, freed from lobha, obtains nirvana (or has obtained or will obtain nirvana).

• Hetu paccaya (root condition)
• Root (anusaya) exists but not as a plant (lobha).

[Anusaya Sutta:] its root destroyed, made like a palmyra stump, deprived of the conditions of development, not destined for future arising; [Thanissaro Bhikkhu] [Anusaya] are identified or associated with kleśa, paryavasthāna, and āsrava, and they are the ‘root’ of bhava [Dr. Ari Ubeysekara:] The seventh and the last of the latent tendencies is [obsession with ignorance (avijjanusaya)] which can be considered as the root cause of all unwholesome actions.

• Root (obsession) of greed is not greed.
• Nibbana is realised by exhausting the past kamma committed based on greed, anger and delusion.
• Anusaya Sutta: Obsessions (1): the seven obsessions

[Bastow:] The same argument is then applied to other things that can be seen with respect to lobha: it can be seen that lobha is a fetter, a bondage, an anusaya; and further that lobha is to be rejected, to be left behind, to be abandoned, to be fully known (prajna).

• Sarvāstivādis knew about anusaya, but they might not understand it as explained by the Sakyamuni Buddha.
• Lobha comes into being when consciousness comes to contact with a sight, sound, smell, taste, touch or thought of an object/subject that is alluring.
• Dosa comes into being when consciousness comes to contact with a sight, sound, smell, taste, touch or thought of an object/subject that is agitating/annoying.
• Moha comes into being when consciousness comes to contact with a sight, sound, smell, taste, touch or thought of an object/subject that is difficult, mysterious, deluding...
• Lobha, dosa, and moha cannot exist at the same moment of consciousness, nor unconscious-ness.
• Lobha, dosa, and moha are cetasika.
• Citta and cetasika need each other's support to stand like the two sheaves of reeds.
• Lobha, dosa, and moha cannot be abandoned, but they must be eradicated by digging out the roots.

Devadaha Sutta (2)

[SN 22:2 Venerable Sāriputta explained to a large number of monks:] ‘When one is not free from passion, desire, love, thirst, fever, & craving for [rūpa], then from any change & alteration in that [rūpa], there arises sorrow, lamentation, pain, grief, & despair. When one is not free from passion… for feeling… for perception… for fabrications… & despair. When one is not free from passion, desire, love, thirst, fever, & craving for consciousness... & despair. Seeing this danger, our teacher teaches the subduing of passion & desire for [rūpa]… for feeling… for perception… for fabrications. Seeing this danger our teacher teaches the subduing of passion & desire for consciousness.’

A History of Indian Philosophy Volume 1

by Surendranath Dasgupta 1922 212,082 words ISBN-13: 9788120804081
Quoting Vasumitra (100 A.D.), Surendranath Dasgupta presents three major Mahayanist groups as doctrinally not very different, and the Hindu authors ignored their (minor) differences.

1. Mahāsaṅghikas: the body was filled with mind {citta) which was represented as sitting,
2. Prajñaptivādins: no agent in man, no untimely death, for it was caused by the previous deeds of man,
3. Sarvāstivādins believed that everything existed.

We can observe how all these doctrines are presented in the earliest Mahayanist sutras, particularly the Mahāprajñāpāramitāśāstra, the Prajñāpāramitāhṛdayasūtra, the Lankavatara Sutra, Saddharma Pundarika Sutra (the Lotus Sutra).

the Prajñaptivādins had inaugurated the Śūnyavāda by drawing up a list of ten emptinesses. In the Mahāvibhāṣā [...] we read [...] there are many śūnyatās [...] Were the Prajñaptivādins the inventors of these ten śūnyatās or were they borrowed from the Mahāyānists? [II. Emptiness in the Hinayānist sects]

Gelongma Karma Migme Chödrön asks that question. The Hindu writers seem to have the answer:

[Dasgupta] When the Hindu writers refer to the Buddhist doctrine in general terms such as “the Buddhists say” without calling them the Vijñānavādins or the Yogācāras and the Śūnyavādins, they often refer to the Sarvāstivādins by which they mean both the Sautrāntikas and the Vaibhāṣikas, ignoring the difference that exists between these two schools.

Nāgārjuna did not consider the Prajñaptivādins as Mahayanists. Mahayana did not exist when the Mahāsaṅghikas was formed after the second schism (Devadatta's schism was the first), so they are considered as Sthaviravādis, who produced Prajñaptivādins and Sarvāstivādins. By AD 5th-6th, Bodhidharma arrived to China, and according to him, Mahayana was well-established as the Yogacara school, which adopted the Lankavatara Sutra.

Bodhidharma was believed to have introduced the Lankavatara Sutra to Chinese Buddhism. This sutra was a development of the Yogacara (“Mind-only”) school of Buddhism established by the great masters Asanga and Vasubandhu, and Bodhidharma is described as a “master of the Lankavatara Sutra”. [ Bodhidharma – the founder of Gongfu (Tsem Rinpoche and Pastor Adeline)]

The authors of the Lankavatara were the Sarvāstivādins.

[Bodhidharma:] the only reason I’ve come to China is to transmit the instantaneous teaching of the Mahayana This mind is the Buddha. (Bloodstream Sermon)
[Bodhidharma:] "This nature is the mind. And the mind is the buddha."
[Lanka:] this triple world is nothing but a complex manifestation of one’s mental activities."

Bodhidharma, known as an expert in the ten-stage sutra, was a zen master, from the Yogacara school. He did not know vipassana, as he condemned arhats. He was clearly a follower of Mahadeva, who authored the five points downgrading the arhats.

[Bodhidharma:] Among Shakyamuni’s ten greatest disciples, Ananda was foremost in learning. But he didn’t know the Buddha. All he did was study and memorize. Arhats don’t know the Buddha...

Bodhidharma did not know the meaning of arhat. Nāgārjuna defines arhat in Mahāprajñāpāramitāśāstra as follow:
[quote]
1. Ara means enemy (ari) and hat means to kill (han). The expression therefore means “killer of enemies”.^\1]) Some stanzas say:

The Buddha has patience (kṣānti) as his armor (varman), Energy (vīrya) as his helmet (śīrṣaka),
Discipline (śīla) as his great steed (mahāśva),
Dhyāna as his bow (dhanus),
Wisdom (prajñā) as his arrows (śara).
Outwardly, he destroys the army of [Māra] (https://www.wisdomlib.org/definition/mara#mahayana) (*mārasena*).
Inwardly, he destroys the passions (kleśa), his enemies.
He is called Arhat.

1. Furthermore, A marks negation and rahat means ‘to be born’. The expression means, therefore, “unborn”. The seeds (bīja) of the mind of the Buddha (buddhacitta) ‘do not arise’ in the field of rebirths (punarbhavakṣetra), for ignorance (avidyā) in him has been dissolved.

[end quote] Nevertheless, the Flower Sermon, which was composed in 1036 states that Mahayana comes from Kashyapa, whom Bodhidharma mentions in the Bloodstream Sermon. Based on Bodhidharma's attitude to the arhats, that Kashyapa could not be the Venerable Mahakassapa, the father of the Sangha who established the Theravada. However, that Kashapa appears in the Lankavatara Sutra:

Kashyapa (fl. 400 B.C.) . Also known as Uruvilva Kashyapa or Mahakashyapa, he was the eldest of the three Kashyapa brothers and among the Buddha’s earliest disciples. He was also India’s First Patriarch of Zen. [Lankavatara Sutra: Glossary. Page 458]

The Mahayanists expect they could become Buddhas by following these individuals.

The Flower Sermon (1036 AD) : the Buddha gathered his disciples together for a talk on Dharma. Instead of speaking, however, the Buddha simply held up a lotus flower in front of him without saying a word. “I possess the true Dharma eye, the marvelous mind of Nirvāṇa, the true form of the formless, the subtle Dharma gate that does not rest on words or letters but is a special transmission outside of the scriptures. This I entrust to Mahakasyapa.”

Reddit, please help! Lately I'm always feeling like a failure. My partner (29 M) supports me in my self care & work & hobbies & loves to boost me up so much, but he also frequently tells me things I've done wrong. I'd always rather he be honest about his feelings, but i feel like it's very frequent and isn't resolved briefly either. Something comes up at least twice a month where he says he doesn't feel listened to or valued or "like a partner" in our relationship and things blow up. This has happened for 3 months now. I have tried really hard to fix previous tangible concerns like letting him know when I'll be away from my phone for a while or making changes to not be late to things. We have had some really good strides where I've been able to tell him sorry for things I say that sound inconsiderate asap and asking what he means about things to avoid miscommunications. But somehow the last 48 hours have been a nightmare even with my growth and progress. I'm sorry this post is lengthy but I'll try my best to explain the most recent example
Sunday my bf slept through his brother coming to visit on accident. He woke up and texted me and said he was spiraling a bit about feeling bad about it and would be okay but just needed a "5" to show him I was there. (this is supposed to be a call back to us saying I love you 5 ever in the past)
I didn't see his text for 30 minutes and then told him l was soo sorry I didn't see this sooner and that I was really sorry he slept through his alarm and missed that, but his body must have needed rest. He said it's okay, it's just my brother.
We spoke for 40 minutes about mothers day and other stuff and then he said "hey you never sent a 5" and I said "oh shoot, 5". It then was shared that it really upset him that I hadn't read and replied to that part of his text. It made him feel not listened to, he said, that I chose to reply how I wanted instead of doing what he asked for. I apologized and also said sorry I didn't say a 5 sooner and that I wish I had seen his text and sent a 5 right away. He got upset that I was apologizing for not texting him right away. He said apologizing for the thing he's not even upset about (not replying for 30 minutes) takes away his agency and takes away from him feeling heard.
He then explained it wasn't fully about the 5 - it was that it hurt that I didn't ask more about his feelings and just changed the topic after he said "it's okay". I think sometimes I forget people say "it's okay" to try to be strong when really they want to talk about their feelings. He emphasized he wished I had asked about his feelings and I said I definitely should have and need to be better about asking more follow up if he opens up and says he's spiraling.
I apologized a ton Sunday night and called him and cried to him on the phone about how much I cared and how much I didn't want to hurt him. He told me it was going to be okay and he even told me he felt loved and cared about. He showed appreciation when I took accountability and I said things like "I totally see how it made you feel not heard that I didnt do a small thing you asked for" and "I really should have followed up by asking more about your feelings or why you were spiraling".
Monday he got upset again once he woke up and said I was defensive yesterday and it hurt and that I talk at him and not with him (I did get defensive a bit by saying things like "I didn't know you weren't still okay and I took it at face value when you said you were okay" or saying "I told you I know I messed up and I shouldn't have ignored you opening up to me" when he brought up again how hurt he felt. But sometimes he repeated how hurt he was and how he wished I would hold myself accountable. So I would at times get defensive by saying "well I tried telling you that I'm sorry I ____"
I didn't know what to keep saying besides sorry and that I messed up. I tried keeping my answers brief after he said i was making things about myself (being emotional in my guilt) because i didnt want to risk monopolizing the conversation. Then he told me I really hurt him because he shared 2 paragraphs about how hurt he was and I gave a 10 word answer. I apologized multiple times for my 10 word answer. I said I only kept it short to keep the focus on him. He said it felt like I wasn't even trying. I tried asking what else he needs or what I could do to help and he told me I'm just Asking "out of self preservation". Then when I said I wish I knew what I could do to help he said "did you ask". Three different times when I said I wish I could make him feel better or things like I am trying to give thoughtful answers he would say "did you ask" and then I would say "ask what?" And get frustrated when he didn't give me a straight answer. When I got upset for not getting an answer to my question, he said I was making it about me again.
At some point he asked for examples of me asking accountability. I sent screenshots of when I said I messed up and hurt him and I should've done differently and he got upset and said "those are from yesterday and don't impact how I feel today". I tried taking accountability again today in multiple sentences. He seemed grateful that I did and was glad to hear me list the things I messed up and take the blame for. But then when I brought up something i was hoping we could still do (a surprise party for him) he got really upset and said I was only thinking about what I wanted (to see him and get him to the surpise) instead of what he wanted (to not go out). This led to him skipping his own surprise party today. We haven't had a conversation since he skipped it.
A chunk of yesterdays convo, word for word: M: "I felt so small when you gave me a 10 word response I felt like I didn't explain enough or wasn't good enough . And to not really have a response, it hurt me so bad."
F: "I'm sorry for hurting you so much and giving so small of a response. I'm really sorry for the things I did to make you feel small."
M: "thats not what I'm worried about or bothers me"
F: "What are you worried about or bothered by? You shared it Made you feel small when I sent a 10 word response, so I thought that was a part of the problem."
M: "Not really related and makes me feel worse about getting the love I need/want"
F: "i don't understand. You brought up how much hurt you and how low it made you feel, how is it not related?"
M: "Did you ask?"
F: "I'm asking now"
M: "I'm sorry, I didn't realize you being hurt negated everything I've felt?"
F: "What? Where did I say I'm hurt?"
M: "You're asking a question so you could feel good or secure but I dont feel I'm afforded the same"
A convo chunk from today:
M: i spend so much energy and get so little in return. When I reach out and ask for help everything gets focused on how you felt. When do I matter?
F: I'm sorry. I hope you can get to feel like you matter now. I have been trying to do what you need and put very little focus on myself and I'll keep trying
M: If you can't try or listen to what I'm saying or asking for just leave me alone and make this whole situation easier. I'm exhausted and tired from giving you grace and somehow things always focus back on you.
_--- Then In several texts asked him if he explain how things kept coming back to me and he said the focus just keeps coming back to me.because I won't take accountability. He is embarrassed and doesn't feel good enough. Because I don't show him support when he needs it and don't show i care in the ways he wants or needs the way he supports me when I'm low.
F; I'm sorry and I wish I had afforded you the same. I'm trying to give thoughtful answers, sorry if they have to be short because I'm at work. Can you explain how you feel like the focus has been coming back to me in today's convo. M: did you ask? F: ask what? M: dude we aren't doing this again F: dude I asked for clarification becuase I don't get your question M: It's not about you. I don't think you're ready or capable of loving me the way I want or need. I feel like I've given you grace and afforded you the space to make or acknowledge mistakes. I can't keep begging to be heard and feel like I'm overreacting or misunderstood. It's fine to ask for clarification, but when you do it hijacks the conversation and we never revist what I said.
F: because I don't get an answer so it's hard to revisit the topic when I'm still confused
M: I'm sorry , I didn't realize that me spiraling or being in a bad place was only continued because you didn't get a response. This isn't about you.
I want to get him to couples therapy because I care about him SO much and he has a really big heart and a good soul. But once he feels hurt, it's like he's stuck being the victim and can't see how horribly irrational our conversations are going. I am not perfect at conflict either - I get defensive if he keeps talking about being hurt, and I end up crying a lot to him about how bad I feel for hurting, and sometimes he has to help me calm me down from my intense crying over the problem I caused, which is draining for him. But I think at least in this case he is really stuck in a victim complex where he isnt doing any wrong and I'm not doing much right to him. I genuinely feel like therapy could really help, I want to support him, but I'm nervous to just outright ask for it. What do I do? How could I ease into the topic?
TL;DR: Although I have tried to be very patient and take accountability there are a lot of things I do that hurt my boyfriend. I have worked on improve some concrete things but our most recent conflict (detailed above) has me feeling anxious and lost because I try taking accountability throughout but he is still upset no matter what I say. I don't think he knows how to handle conflict and I'm not perfect at it either but i am very willing to name everything I do wrong and try to change it. I want to suggest couples therapy so he can see we can both do better. Not sure how.

[OC Intro: The game is modded to increase basic jobs cost, seasonal events are disabled. Much of the crash details are based on NASA/SP-2008-565 Columbia Crew Survival Investigation Report recommendations especially Chapter 3 "Occupant Protection".]
The ship is without power, and Tightniks can't run the radar much without draining the batteries. He has only a few minutes of APU power left, goes over the best clearing he can find, and radars it. It varies by only a few feet from the aerodynamic glideslope there. He spots it out on the cameras and circles to go after that spot. He's only at two hundred feet now. With one hand on the stick, he uses the other to open the pressure equalization valve on the side hatch, then at one hundred feet, gets it undogged. Depending on how much damage he's going to get, it's less likely to be stuck closed and trap him. The dynamic vacuum this pulls in the cockpit rips most of the survival pack data cards from that rack and scatters them across the landscape. Crap, I'm gonna need those! Refocusing on surviving the next few seconds, he turns on the radar for the final approach, takes a last look around, then straight ahead at his forward camera and PFD, he clicks his HANS and shoulder strap locks in; after that, he can barely move, but that now is better than dying in this crash with a broken neck. He's a decent pilot and brings up the flare gently. Bringing up the alpha on this delta-winged ship, he balloons a little, but keeps the nose going up and restores a zero aerodynamic sink rate just above the highest terrain indicated by the radar altimeter. The ship bumps a little in the ground effect, and he can see the radar altitude cycling irregularly up and down about five feet at a time. Rougher than it looked from higher up! The body flap protecting the dead engines hits first, and the nose comes rapidly down. It hits, the screens go blank, and Tightniks is surrounded by airbags, some lifting his feet from the rudder petals and his hand from the control stick. It's blinding, it's disorienting, it's noisy, and, to his relief, it's long! It takes several seconds before the crashing cockpit stops moving. How many times did he flip over? Did he go sideways and roll? Am I rightside up? Are we really stopped on the ground? The airbags deflate, and he can move his arms. He gets his restraints loose and inspects himself. "Uck!" he says out loud (without the 'f'). No broken bones. His pressure suit can take his blood pressure. 116/81, pulse 112, blood oxygen 99 reads off on his left arm, I'll friggin' take it!
The ship is amazingly intact from what he can tell. He can't get any readings. The systems test meter seems to be working, but can't find any voltages anywhere. The ship seems to be completely dead. Behind him, 10 passenger seats are all surrounded by airbags and the back of the cabin ends in some sort of dirt-and-gravel and there's a bit of daylight seeping in around the edges. He was the only one on board, though, so their deployment was mostly academic (they might have stiffened the structure a little during the crash, but that's probably trivial.) Tightniks gets out of his spacesuit. The air on this planet is actually breathable. He gets the hatch open, steps outside and-
"A green shimmer erupts then disappears, and you hit the ground."
The human emerges from the glowing green mist and hits the ground. Groans. Pushes against that ground, trying to get back up. Where am I? What's my name? I remember nothing. Aren't babies born naked? He's got a dark blue button-down shirt on. A uniform? A shoulder patch. Gets up, looks around. I feel really heavy. I'm not that fat, am I? He picks up a small stone from the ground, this also feels heavier than it should. He rises to his feet and holds it out somewhat (he's unable to fully extend his arm) and lets it go. The stone hits the ground near his feet quickly and with remarkable speed. It's the gravity, it's greater than it is on- ...where am I from? This is- ...not my home planet? "Oooh..."
"Ka?" it says.
What is that? It's cute, at least.
It is not tame. He has no hope of catching it on foot. The creature seems to like the berries. Maybe if I gather some of those into one place and set some kind of trap...
33s: First trap.
I got one! The human lumbers up to the trap and gets the catch open. Do you bite? It doesn't matter much to me; I'm so friggin' screwed.
It doesn't. It looks at the human with a sense of wonder, actually. A blink and tilt of the head. Seems almost to be asking, Is it you? My purpose? My savior? Once out of the trap, which is totally wrecked, he has to make a new one from scratch, it follows him around like a imprinted hatchling bird.
Wiry little fella, you are. You're going to need some bulking up to do anything useful. The- ...'trimp', I guess... The trimp seems just barely able to feed itself. The human lets him into the broken ship's intact cabin, and it curls up comfortably in a passenger seat for a nap.
1m03s: Second trap.
"Apparently the Trimps breed if they're not working. Doesn't look pleasant."
What are they doing?
The trimps appear to be androgynous, and these two have paired off in the back of the ship. They're holding something carefully within a few hours, feeding it berries, grass, and- ...corundum.
Corundum?? Whatever that is, it isn't a baby.
1m35s: Third trap.
Only it IS a baby! The third trimp he trapped immediately joined the other two in raising it. They have a strange diet of food the human has found compatible with his own body, but they also eat rocks! They're careful to crush and sort aluminate minerals from silcate ones and only eat aluminate. Actually, they don't eat aluminate, they're only feeding it to the baby.
2m06s: Fourth trap.
All four are raising the same child, who is just starting to toddle. It seems these fellas have alumina or maybe even aluminum bones. The human takes a nap and wakes to find the first child grown up and they're starting to raise a second child, all five of them.
2m46s: Huts.
The human found a working bit of electronics. He calls it a pad, but maybe it's more like a smartphone. It has plans for two residential structures. The first, the smaller one, he can build right away, but the second one needs something called "drywall", and he has to figure out how to make that before he can build it. Huts and houses, apparently.
3m13s: 10 pop, full, first farmer.
The trimp he trained to farm and make paper took an incredible 50 units of food to get bulked up to do the work, and now it's not participating in rearing the child. But less than an hour after the trimp started farming and pulping, the child was out on its own, and the trimps did not start another. The ten seats on the ship were all full. Well, eleven counting the one up front that the human sleeps in. The pilot starts exploring the area.
3m28s: Battle.
Wait, what are you do-
The hostile roars and charges at the human, but one of his trimps jumps in front of him with a stick and they fight. It started right when the human got far enough away from the ship that the hostile non-trimps away from the ship began to regard him as leaving his own territory. After the trimp defeats the first enemy, it continues after other hostiles.
3m53s: Shield I in Z1c5.
The human is easily able to recover the loot in the territory cleared by the fighting trimp. Then he sees something glinting in the- That can't be! What the heck is that? It's a data card that fits his pad. It quite clearly regards trimp combat. He gets it loaded into his pad and studies it. I can do this, it just takes some wood. He returns to the ship to discover that they had already started on a new child before the fighter had even expired in battle. The human concentrates on his research.
4m38s: Mskel in Z1c11 defeated.
The remains of this one seem rather white and shiny. It's titanium! This enemy had titanium bones! He'll store them away. They'll be useful someday, I'm sure.
5m52s: Dagger I in Z1c20.
Where are these data cards coming from? The human wonders as he loads this one into his pad, It's for a weapon it calls a dagger. He blinks. I don't know what a dagger is. I'll take your word for it, data card. Needs metal. He has gathered some, but ore is plentiful. He can just dig and smelt it whenever he wants. For now, I'll continue researching.
6m18s: Arable in Z1c21.
It's an old cave that trimps like to live in. Why weren't they able to live there before? How could these friendly critters be confined to only the exact spot where THAT thing, he looks back where he came from, not remembering that he piloted the wrecked ship to its current resting place, crashed? This is really strange. I'll let them fill up this cave before advancing further. Wait, what about defenses? The hostiles never try to reclaim territory that they've lost, so he stops worrying about that fairly quickly.
8m22s: First hut is 0.3% first ever AP.
The trimps seem fairly easy to please in terms of living quarters. Two move into his first hut and start raising a child. The human has his tent, uniform, and the heater pilfered from his space suit. Not much of a mud fan.
9m59s: Miners in Z1c30.
Oh, what's on this data card? Sl3niw? Oh, I'm holding the pad upside down. Miners. I can teach trimps how to mine ores and smelt met- 200 units of food? Each job is getting more expensive to train a trimp for. He puts his bee nickels to his eyes and spots another data card probably 10 enemies away. "Sc"? Does that means science? I can teach trimps to do science??
13m57s: Scientists in Z1c40.
Due to the expense of training trimps, the human couldn't afford to build them shields until now, he's got Sh1-3 made for the fighter to capture the science training data card. 14m02s: One head went into that turtlimp shell, that of his fighter, but two came out: his fighter still has his head on, and he managed to get the turtlimp's head off. It rushes off after the deadly penguimp in the next cell. The shields are not doing all that much good, actually, but they're better than nothing. The human picks up and loads the science data card and- Holy runny sugar-free fudge crap! 1000 food units, but it'll endow them with the ability to speak. Good. I'm getting bored with no one to talk to.
14m28s: Bloodlust purchased and AutoFight enabled (that delay after getting it is an effect of jacking up the job cost.)
As the human buries this expired little trimp warrior, he comes to the sobering realization that he has more trimp graves in his growing trimp colony than he does live trimps. And yet they seem more hopeful now than before I got to know any of them. They seem to think I'm the solution to all their problems or- Those two look east somberly, then notice that he's watching them and smile back and wave at him. ...one problem that is specific, but very, very huge for them. [The only reason I say 'east' is because that's right on a map, and the game advances right across a row, then up. I might say 'northeast' on occasion for that reason.]
20m47s: Z1c73, Miners taken.
Are you my new mining foreman? The trimp who took to the mining training has dark brown fur that lays flat on its head. It's unusual in not having any bits that stick out from its head, ahoge or whatever. This one is relatively quiet, and while it has assimilated the mining and smelting knowledge, it needs to bulk up to do any mining. Smelting is relatively easy, and getting a strong natural draft going in a furnace is almost trivial with the increased gravity. This trimp builds furnaces like nothing. And likes to nap in holes it digs right on the spot; it's weird that way. [Puchim@s Yukipo, and furnaces are not explicit in Trimps.]
21m58s: Farming in Z1c80.
The resourcing "books" are not data cards but paper scrolls, apparently lost to the trimps. It seems that they were civilized in the recent past and some calamity swept over the planet to reduce them to this. Did I have something to do with it? Amnesia sucks harder than a Dyson- ...what's a Dyson? Whatever, it sucks. This disaster happening just before I crash in the only spot with trimps still alive would be a seriously crazy coincidence! Something is really, really wrong about all this. [The author has not sought or received product placement permission or fee from Dyson Technology Ltd. or any resellers of their stuff, just they literally suck balls and made my favorite vacuum cleaner.]
23m50s: Builder in Z1c90.
They've rescued an, I dunno, gelding trimp? It just started to build a shed around the piled lumber I left to build one. It's really slow compared to me, and just banged its thumb, but it is super cute with that long reddish head fur. That particular trimp is also fascinated with pink ribbons and likes to decorate its head fur with them. Because of its inherent inability to participate in rearing children, it isn't counted in the population. [Puchim@s Io, builder on the basis of Iori seen building in 1x10.]
26m02s: Zone 2, 44 pop, 5.5s RC with Z0/1.
It's some sort of tactical manual - tactical coordination. Coordination! He's starting to sort out some trimpese on the research he has done so far. It needs a lot of metal, so they won't be able to implement it for some time. Hopefully, they're still good one at a time, but these enemies seem to be getting bigger as we go along. Uh oh!
27m33s: Gym in Z2c5.
It's some sort of training dojo or sporting arena. The human examines the ruins, I think I can back-engineer drawings for this, get one built, and see what happens.
29m02s: 1g, 47 pop, 10.8s RC with Z1/2.
The two fighting trimps now with their gym and coordination are dodging and blocking enthusiastically, and making much faster ground against the bad guys then a little while ago when it was just one trimp fighting at a time and unable to avoid the enemy hitting back.
40m46s: Fresh turkimp in Z2c74, 63 pop, 7.9s RC, Sh1-10, Da1-5, Bo1-3, Ma1-3, Hm1-3, 6g.
Oh, wow, the laborers seem really hot after this turkimp. He cooks it up and tries a slice. It's really awesome! I have to work alongside his laboring trimps to share it, but I'm getting used to the gravity now. That scroll we found back in Z2c10 really helped. Trimps' techniques and appliances for handicapped individuals, and I'm really handicapped in this higher gravity. He joins the woodcutters with the turkimp; they're the most numerous resource laborer right now, building more gyms, enough that the block/dodge ability of the fighting trimps is almost caught up to the enemy's ability to cause damage.
43m15s: Zone 3, 63 pop, 7.9s RC with Z1/2.
I'm neglecting my science and trimp scientists are really expensive. Curiously, that grey-haired one can't speak all that well, only says "Tai" and "Shijou", but it can write and draw like nobody's business. It's the only scientist so far. [Puchim@s Takanya: Online references probably still claim that she can utter the first two syllables of any word, but she can actually utter only the first two kana syllables of someone's name, most often the given name of basis human Takane Shijou, who also has that habit. (All the utterances of the puchidoru are based on the speech foibles of their basis humans except maybe Piyopiyo, where I haven't seen anything match up so far.)]
47m32s: Finally, we can make drywall and houses. 59m30s: Z3c77, 94 pop, 7.8s RC.
Oh, those poor things are really struggling up at the front. These trimps are enthusiastic and know no fear, but I still feel like telling them to stop for a while. I don't have the heart to keep them from trying while they're still doing some damage.
1h05m24s: Zone 4, 107 pop, 9.3s RC with Z3/4. 1h15m26s: Zone 5, 120 pop, 8.2s RC with Z3/4.
"What is that?" the human asks. He has three scientists. His first does all the writing, but the other two can actually speak. One of them hops up on a rock spire beside the human to reach his eye level.
At the next ridge line, over the lowest and most passable gap in the terrain, this really mean looking hovering sausage monster.
"I dunno," the scientist trimp shrugs, "But it's making me hungry. Looks like a perfectly cooked frankfurter from here." [John Morell's dubious dirigibles.]
"Oh, yeah," the human nods, "that's a blimp."
"A blimp?" the trimp tilts its head quizzically at the human, "How could you know?"
"I wish I could tell you, little buddy," the human extends his arm braces to descend the pass on the side of the zone boundary in the boss enemy's direction, then grunts, "Let's go kill it."
1h16m11s: Z1c9, 120 pop, 10.3s RC with Z4/5. 1h33m34s: Zone 6, 151 pop, 7.4s RC with Z4/5.
1h33m54s: TP in Z1c3.
"What's this?" the human asks, having picked up the little square document with the curling corners.
"Oh," the hungry scientist looks at it, "It's a garden path, follow me."
"You want to lead me down the garden path?" the human says.
"Yeah," the scientist says.
"Are you kidding?" the human asks.
"No," says the other scientist, "We don't get human humor. Listen, these fighters can't go, let them wear themselves out here, then we'll take the next group through this garden."
"Okay," the human nods, watching two more trimps join the fray as he issues the Z5 coordination orders, "they're doing pretty well after all that block training research we just wrapped up." [That's a common artifact, even in normal games, Z5 Traintacular combines with many gyms, enough population to add several trainers, affording Blockmaster, which is expensive on a run zero, plus a break on Tion Z5, a 40% all-stat increase. I don't think Zach designed it into the game on purpose, it just worked out this way.]
1h34m07s: 151 pop, 10.5s RC with Z5/7. 1h37m44s: Drop from Z6c39, TP for 3.
"Now we have these access map frags we can use to route through the old trimpopoli," the scientist explains, "Atlimpis for food, Morimpa for gems, Everimp for metal, and Impazon for wood."
"What about the garden?" the human asks.
"Well, we got lucky with Tricky Paradise," the scientist says, "but you can randomize the route and maybe get lucky. What's with that look?"
"Somehow, I'm remembering 'frag' as something that blew up with deadly pieces," the human says. [Different video games - ones with better graphics and worse gameplay Ｏ(>▽<)Ｏ]
1h39m59s: Blues back up to the top on series I...
"Tai, Tai!" the first ever trimp scientist stops the human just before he upgrades the mace and dagger to Mk.6 and Mk. 8 respectively. It has a note for him.
"Why do you keep calling me that?" the human asks, "Do you think that's my name?"
"Shijou, Shijou," it nods as though to indicate, I KNOW it is. Then it proffers its note again. The human takes it and reads, "Don't upgrade the first row equipment right now."
"Why not?" the human asks.
"Shijou," it points at the end of the mapped route, where there's a scroll sticking out of the thistles.
2h24m07s: Zone 8, 224 pop, 12.2s RC with Z7/12.
"Your settlement is getting crowded, there's Trimps in the streets, and you're taking heat. You feel a sudden strong desire to create a map, though you're not quite sure how that would help."
2h49m10s: Zone 9, 357 pop, 9.5s RC with Z8/15.
"You can't shake the feeling that you've been here before. Déjà-vu?"
The trimps really seem to like the new high capacity mansions, and the village has rapidly expanded since they started building them.
"There's something familiar about this," the human says.
"Tai," the grey one that writes clings to his arm and shows him a note that says, "Don't give up now."
"We must persist," says the yellow one has found a foothold it can grab onto and grabs the human's shoulder gently, "If you give up to early, we'll never solve this. You'll be stuck here forever."
The human puts his hand over the trimp's paw on his shoulders, then looks at him, "I can die, too."
"No, you can't," the trimp says quietly, "Please don't test that, tall one."
"Death is just another path..." he remembers.
"Gan," the grey one squeaks. [That's the first two kana syllables of "Gandalf"]
"...one that we all must take," the human continues, "The grey rain-curtain of this world rolls back, and all turns to silver glass, and then you see it-"
"A green mist," the yellow trimp interrupts, "flash of fire, we're all gone and our progress forgotten. The wandering stars return to that day, and you again crash that ship- ...a little better every time."
"Wait," the human looks around, "have I been here before?"
"I-" the yellow trimp tries in futility to share what little it knows, "...or... somebody got just a little coolant into the-"
"Into the what?"
"This side up," the grey one's note says.
"Into the that," the yellow one points at the note, "It really helped. You- ...I don't think we've ever had mansions before."
Well, of course they didn't have mansions before. That was one of my ship's data cards. How did it get way out here? Will anything start to make sense?
3h02m13s: Zone 10, 387 pop, 8.7s RC with Z8/15; '28s: 11.1s RC with Z9/19. 3h16m41s: Tough snimp after food book, L10 rand dept from lo-hi-med 118/25/96, 4 Items.
"That's twice our frags led us to gem-rich Moria," the human says.
"Morimpa," the new red trimp scientist corrects, there now being 5 scientists. [There'd be more if there were more turkimp.]
"The question is how do we use all these gems?" the human looks at the village zoning plans again, "I like those mansions and all, but they use hardly any gems compared to, well-" he gestures at the pile of over two dozen thousand gems they've gathered, "-that! And still a lot of wood and lumber."
"I think there's something," the yellow one sighs, "I wish I knew more."
Quite some time later, after they're done looting that route for equipment plans, the trimps are again advancing through Zone 10, and he hears it.
"Tai?" the grey one wonders.
"Where are you going?" the yellow one asks.
"To the farm," the human answers.
"Whatever for?" the red one seems exasperated.
"Shijou?" the grey one sighs, then looks at the fighting front. It's been around long enough to remember, "Shijou!"
"You guys already get so much to eat this doesn't do you much good," the human explains.
3h32m33s: L11 112/35/78 rand sea, dropped from Z11c6 with disband, 4.
"What's wrong?" the red one asks.
The human comforts one of the wounded. Once trimps start into a zone fight, they have to finish before they bleed out. He's really bothered making them desert in front of that second turkimp. "They had a lot left in them," he sighs, rubbing his eyes, "but we can't keep that much dead turkimp at once, we have to leave it alive to use up all of this one."
"Shijou," the grey one presents a note, "We need this map right away, anyway. Don't worry about it, Tightniks."
"Tightniks?" he looks at the grey one, "Is that me? How do you know?"
"Tai," the grey one points at the top of the human's left breast pocket.
"Ah, crud," the yellow one curls its tail around in front of itself as trimps do when they're embarrassed, "Is that really a name tag?"
The human hadn't even noticed it since the green flash blew up his memory as he was stepping out of the ship.
4h04m22s: Block (sub-8h AP is only 0.3%), taking it, 504 pop, 9.8s RC with Z10/24.
It's a pretty thick book about using shields for block instead of hit points. The pad has the stats analysis. Sh3-1 is only giving us 9% of our hit points. Turning to his trimp scientists, he says, "It seems to me to be worth it."
"Let's," the yellow one nods.
"Shijou," it hands him a note, "It scales badly, but that won't matter for a long time. I think there's a way to undo it before it matters."
"Doing it." The human takes out his pad and starts scanning.
4h29m05s: L14 rand moun 137/26/80 is really good for a lo-hi-med. 4h30m52s: Hotels.
"Ah," the yellow one says, "I knew there was something. That must be it."
5h08m09s: L15 lo-hi-hi rand gard 129/28/82 (just got explorers). 5h09m32s: Picked up Wall.
"Dam," the human says.
"Damn?" the red one chuckles.
"No," the human says, "Earthen wall dam; it's a thing that makes artificial lakes by holding rivers back."
"Lakes?" the yellow one asks, "Rivers?"
"Oh yeah," the human says, "This planet doesn't have enough rain for those..."
5h48m21: Leaving Wall from about c70 to fetch Tion Z15.
"You can't resume the map from the same point if you start another," the human reads the grey one's note.
"We can go back to the same point on that route if we hold there and finish Zone 15, right?" Tightniks asks.
"Shijou!" it seems to be saying yes.
"Yes," the yellow one adds, "but we're out of Series III upgrades, and you need a fresh map route to start up Series IV."
"We should be okay," Tightniks says, "but if we have to start it over, I don't see that being a big deal." As they advance through the rest of Zone 15, Tightniks resumes his usual duties at the research desk instead building and running traps like he was before.
The trimps seem hopeful at this decision.
5h49m10s: Fresh turkimp. 5h50m16s: Zone 16, 1071 pop, 13.4s RC with Z15/75, 13m43s turkimp (skel in c1.)
"Z:16 Seriously? Another Blimp so soon?"
"So," Tightniks lowers his bee nickels and looks at the red one, "is it going to be boss fights at the end of every zone from now on?"
"Hmm," the red trimp looks up past the human at some random rock spire or cloud.
"Well?" the human persists.
"Yup," he says.
"Hmph," Tightniks grabs a Sw3-1 of the rack and advances towards the front, "Before then, we have another Mister Titanium."
"What does he like about skeletimps?" the red one asks the grey one as the human marches off.
"Shijou?" the grey one seems just as confused by that.
"He's not going back to the ship, and he's not getting himself killed," the yellow one smiles, "so I'll take it."
5h58m32s...
"Hey guys, go for the mortar!" the human suggests to his 75 fighting trimps in the Wall's boss fight.
"I can tell from your bedtime stories that you're used to the artillery in that other place," the yellow one gripes, "but fighting works differently here, there's no artillery."
And the human instantly collapses laughing, the scientists a little worried he might have injured himself in the planet's severe gravity. But he's okay, at least physically, "Mortar is the stuff between the bricks, fellas. That's is a brickimp, right?"
5h59m18s: Wall, 1076 pop, 13.3s RC, 1% AP for sub-8h finish, first L16 roll good 156/35/84 moun, 10 for the metal.
Beyond the Wall was a more edenic section of the trimpolis ruins, doubling the production of the lumberjacks. The trimps are actually really happy with the mode of all of the laborers moving between the three big jobs, along with the turkimp, except for the foremen specialized at leading the job. It isn't enough to boost their productivity, but the human goes to them with trays of sandwiches.
6h06m52s: 50 map run 0.3% AP...
6h19m13s: Zone 17, 1141 pop, 16.0s RC with Z16/94, no turkimp.
"Z:17 You climb a large cliff and look out over the new Zone. Red dirt, scorched ground, and devastation. Is that a Dragimp flying around out there?!"
"Hmm," the human surveys the new zone with his bee nickels, "Looks like crap. Any ideas?"
"You're the idea man," the yellow one groans.
"Set the map flag," he puts his bee nickels away, "We'll run a depth for practice and to load up on gems for more hotels."
"Righto," the red one gets to work.
6h44m34s: First DCP. (Draglimp Care Package; I refuse to call it a tribute.)
"Oh," the human says, "It's tame now, so it brings back gems in exchange for food?" He looks at his gaping scientists, "That's what it looks like, huh? Guys? Yo!"
"Tai..." the grey one sighs.
Draglimp, the dragimp imprinted on Tightniks, lands beside the human, drops some gems at his feet, and accepts some scratching behind its horns before diving into the food bowl.
"You tamed a dragimp???" Grey's note says.
"Well," the yellow one huffs, "I guess that happened."
8h18m53s: L20 depth of 154/27/79.
"Mapping up here?" the red one half closes one eye and tilts his head.
"Yeah," the human says while fitting together the depth map fragments, "With the coordination book not right at the end, we have an extra mark of coordination to take advantage of. Let's take our housing up to 2000 or so, shall we?"
"Okay," the yellow one says from a pile of logs, "What's all the wood for?" They had been collecting it for days now.
"The series upgrades follow a rather specific pattern," Tightniks explains, "Just on the other side of this blimp is Zone 21, where we should be able to find the Shield series V, right?"
"Shijou!" the grey one nods.
8h56m17s: 1% AP for 100 map runs, leaving it, 1751 pop, 24.8s RC with Z20/232. 8h56m54s: Zone 21...
"Ooooookay," Tightniks growls, "There is something off about this thing."
"Shijou?" the grey one looks at the yellow one with concern about their human starship pilot friend.
The human stoops, picks up the little green gem on the ridge between Zone 20 and 21, looks at it, huffs, and asks, "Any idea where this comes from?"
"Err..." the red one seems hesitant to say, "I think you made it."
"Really?" the human huffs, "How could that be?" Then he tosses it at Red, "See if anything reacts to it. It might be radioactive, so we should take turns to minimize exposure."
"Really?" Red's holding it now, "What makes you say that?"
"Because I'm pissed off for no reason I can figure out," the human says, "I think it's coming from that."
"Frags," the red one says quickly, "I think it's arranging a route. You're good with maps," it tosses the gem to the grey scientist.
"Shijou," the grey one says hopefully, and has a map drawn within a few minutes. [Whether it looks like the one in Puchim@s 1x61 is anyone's guess. That one annoyed me as well as Chihya.]
9h02m37s: L21 moun first roll was a decent 160/26/84. 9h21m00s: Starting run 5 of that map...
Tightniks had taken his anger out on some food and wood to build about 8000 traps. Now he's leaning against a rock spire in his increasingly tattered uniform. A nap begins, perhaps unintentionally.
Wild trimps are examining the pile, finding it unwelcoming, and also finding no place in the town, just mill about. It looks like they want to help.
"Ku?" it's a blue trimp, probably a farmer waiting for stuff to grow, climbs up on the rock spire the human is leaning against, starts patting him on the head, "Ku. Ku ku." [Puchim@s Chihya.]
9h23m09s: Still working that lap...
Tightniks wakes up from that nap, and the grey one is standing there. "Shijou," it says with a note of concern, although not much of one. The note it holds says, "It wasn't me."
"Oh, what wasn't you, buddy?" He stretches out a bit, feeling somewhat refreshed. It feels like somebody washed his face and hair while he was sleeping.
The grey one is also holding a small mirror, apparently broken off from a larger mirror and with the sharp edges filed down to make the edges safe.
The human takes it from the grey trimp and holds it in front of his face to discover that somebody has bound up all his hair into about twenty little pigtails. He touches them with his other hand to confirm. "Eh, whatever." He hands the mirror back and goes back to sleep. [Puchim@s Koamimami.]
9h30m08s: The following run...
"He's not throwing stuff every which way yet," the yellow one whispers to the red one, watching the human snoozing with his pad on his knee.
"You remember that, too?" the red one asks.
"'Remember'?" the yellow one turns to face the red one, "I s'pose that's better than imagining it."
"I remember it, too," the grey one says via a playing card sized note.
"If we're stuck in a time loop," the yellow one sighs, "maybe this cycle will be different."
"Tai..." the grey one admires him for a moment. Then thumbs in the direction of the mountain, "Heh, Shijou!" it laughs.
9h35m58s: Run 8, c9 of that map.
The scientists nap and take notes, and meditate and take notes, and draw stuff. The grey one often storyboards for the other nine because it's the best at drawing stuff. They have come up with a list, and most probably "order" (they're debating whether their ranking means "order" (sequence of things happening over the various loops) or "frequency" (what proportion of previous loops they have happened in). But they've come up with this, from first (or perhaps most often) to most recent (or perhaps least often):
- The ship crashes (they're pretty sure that happens every loop) - The human builds huts - The human teaches some of his trimps to speak and do science - The human builds houses - The human makes maps - The human builds mansions - The human blows up and gets himself killed somewhere around Z17 to Z21, often on a dragimp - The human only recently/occasionally builds hotels - The human only recently/rarely tamed a dragimp - The human only recently/rarely maps the Dimension of Anger
They're all agreed that that they have never finished the Dimension of Anger. What they are not all agreed on is that they've never done this conference to figure out whether they're in a time loop or what that might mean. [See also Star Trek: The Next Generation episode "Cause and Effect" ...which was sort of a time loop but they weren't going back in time. It's very interesting, but its meta makes no sense - no one ever went looking for the Bozeman in 80 years? No one who went looking for the Bozeman also got stuck? No one noticed the passage of time outside the little area of space where the not-quite-a-time-loop was happening? Errr... sci-fi writers, don't be half-assed about your time loops, lmao! Be like Harold Ramis- ...what am I saying?? (That would be Groundhog Day, which grafted a time loop into a romcom; there are no other sci-fi elements. But it was a full-blown time loop and not half-assed like "Cause and Effect".)]
9h54m06s: Dropped from Z21c95...
I think it would be a bad idea to bypass that green area, as much as I'd rather not face it. Both his domesticated trimps, which are breeding up a new group of fighters, and the wild trimps he has decided just now not to open the traps for, stare at him and point in that direction. He shoulders a huge Shield V-3 and grabs an Mace IV-2 as well and announces, "We're doing it." Thus equipped, he marches off into the Dimension of Anger.
10h27m53s: Taking Pi4-2; recently had taken Pa4-2...
The group at the front had expired, and the snimp in DoAc95 glares at the advancing colony of trimps, which had halted only because of it. It refuses to counterattack the vulnerable colony and its human, instead snorting and huffing, waiting for the next bunch of 232 fighting trimps to come in range.
Tightniks runs along the line of traps, releasing the recently tamed trimps, singing a song that he doesn't remember the meaning of, that he doesn't remember was crafted by an ethnically Chinese guy out of an African language, and later mastered by two caucasians over the internet before they ever met in person. "Baba yetu yetu uliye, mbinguni yetu yetu amina..." because it just happened to be stuck in his head. [Because the Doylian author decided on a whim to. Christopher Tin got it into Civilization IV and at the time (2010 July), I made the best video for it on YouTube, which got subsequently blown to shreds when Peter Hollens and Malukah re-recorded the song from scratch in their own voices and instruments in 2014, pity with no English translation, the purpose of my video.]
Noticing the last batch of metal he needs coming out of the furnace, he waves the waiting grey scientist to fire up the forge [to use the term properly and not as the game does], for it was time to wrap up the forging dies for the Spetum IV, Mark 2 pike heads.
"Shijou!" the grey one cheers, setting aside a snack that looks like maybe ramen, and starts jumping up and down on the bellows handle.
It takes a while for the human to chip out the tip in the two halves of the forging die, and then polish it, and then heat it up in the forge, and then quench it, inspect it, and put it into service crafting thousands of new pike heads for the fighting trimps.
But only one second passed on the map frame clock (10h27m54s) four cells behind that snimp, in the case being brooded over by this huge, and if it's honest, rather concerned megablimp.
10h35m45: Portal PB, 45 He, 4.247 He/hr, 1891 pop, 22.7s RC with Z20/232, no turkimp.
The last head of the map's boss monster goes limp as one of the fighting trimps' mace heads bounces of it, and the huge thing settles on its tail, resting on the package that seems to be the prize of this map. And there's a popping sound, and then something mechanical.
Is that a scroll compressor? Tightniks looks at the package. The deflating monster's lifting envelope material drapes over everything underneath it. "Red, Shijou!" he snaps and points, "roll up that side of it. Keep this part from sucking down on the extractor nozzle!"
All ten of the scientists jump in, literally, pushing the gas in the bag towards the compressor. Tightniks as well, rolling up the front.
Until he kicks, and nearly trips over, a smaller package that might be the explanation for the reason why the center of the monster's defense seemed to be a little away from the big package he could see. It's in the right place, he realizes. He gets it uncovered and reads stenciled-and-sprayed block letters on it:
"DT TIME PORTAL / THIS SIDE DOWN"
Perhaps the Dimension of Anger is so named because of the rage suddenly rising up in Tightniks' throat. It isn't so much as the free-floating aggression suddenly has an answer, there is definitely a fresh batch of rage and anger as he grips the nearest Mace IV, Mark 3 with both hands and gets it over his shoulder, its target obviously this object, anger at the realization he screams at the top of his lungs, "We are stuck in a mutha FAH-king time loop!!" His swing begins. [Tightniks almost never cusses, unlike Snugniks.]

3.0. THE THIRD BUDDHIST COUNCIL:

Venerable Moggaliputta Tissa Thera led the 3rd Buddhist Council of Theravada School. That was not a schism as the outsiders were not the true members of the Sangha. However, the king supported them like the members of the Sangha.

Because it helped promote tolerance and mutual respect, Asoka desired that people should be well-learned (bahu sruta) in the good doctrines (kalanagama) of other people's religions. [The Edicts of King Asokaan, English rendering by Ven. S. Dhammika © 1994]

King Asoka was supporting everyone who claimed he belonged to the Dhamma-Vinaya community (the Sangha) established by the Sakyamuni. However, they did not join the Dhamma-Vinaya community, nor know, nor care the Buddha's teaching.
Venerable Moggaliputta Tissa Thera determined that "the Vibhajjavāda alone contained the teaching of the Buddha."

Rest of the monks who were true believers, told about the doctrine of the Buddha, that it was Vibhajjavāda i.e. the religion of analytical reasoning. This answer was supported by Moggaliputta-Tissa who was present there. He told that the Buddha was Vibhajjavādin (analyser). The Thera was made the gurdian of the Order. To purify the Sangha, the king requested to hold the Uposatha ceremony.

Uposatha

uposatha : [m.] Sabbath day; observance of 8 precepts; biweekly recitation of the Vinaya rules by a chapter of Buddhist monks.
Mūḷuposatha sutta (AN 3.70), (Bhikkhu Bodhi)

“There are, Visākhā, three kinds of uposatha. What three? The cowherds’ uposatha, the Nigaṇṭhas’ uposatha, and the noble ones’ uposatha [...] (3) “And how, Visākhā, is the noble ones’ uposatha observed? The defiled mind is cleansed by exertion. And how is the defiled mind cleansed by exertion?

The mentioned uposatha ceremony is for the monks to recite the Vinaya rules. It cannot be observed with the participation of the public, including the monks (and priests) from other religions.

[Uposatha (Thanissaro Bhikkhu)] The monastic observance may be held in one of four ways, depending on the size of the Community in a particular territory: If four bhikkhus or more, they meet for a recitation of the Pāṭimokkha; if three, they declare their mutual purity to one another; if two, they declare their purity to each other; if one, he marks the day by determining it as his uposatha. In addition to these regular observance days, the Buddha gave permission for a Community to recite the Pāṭimokkha only on one other occasion: when unity has been reestablished in the Community. This, the Commentary says, refers only to occasions when a major dispute in the Community has been settled (such as a schism—see Chapter 21), and not to occasions when the uposatha has been suspended for minor reasons. Thus there are two occasions on which the bhikkhus are allowed to meet for the uposatha: the last day of the lunar fortnight and the day for reestablishing unity.

The public uposatha is open to everyone, including non-Buddhists. The participants are expected to observe a set of uposatha sīla, either 8, 9 or 10 (aṭṭha-sīla, navanga-sīla or dasa-sīla).
uposathika : [adj.] one who observes [uposatha] precepts.

Aṭṭha-sīla 8 (Uposatha, Uposatha-sīla): 6. Vikālabhojanā veramaṇī； 7. Naccagītavāditavisūkadassanā mālāgandhavilepanadhāraṇamaṇanavibhūsanaṭṭhānā veramaṇī； 8. Uccāsayanamahāsayanā veramaṇī;

On the basis of not-Dhamma as ‘Dhamma’… Dhamma as ‘not-Dhamma’… not-Vinaya as ‘Vinaya’… Vinaya as ‘not-Vinaya’, Emperor Asoka expelled the non-Vibhajjavādis who could not observe the uposatha, including the Sarvāstivādis, from the Sangha.

[Schism (Thanissaro Bhikkhu)] Ven. Upāli: “‘A split in the Community, a split in the Community (saṅgha-bheda)’ it is said. To what extent is the Community split?” The Buddha: “There is the case where they explain not-Dhamma as ‘Dhamma’… Dhamma as ‘not-Dhamma’… not-Vinaya as ‘Vinaya’… Vinaya as ‘not-Vinaya’… [...] a light offense as ‘a heavy offense’… a heavy offense as ‘a light offense’… an offense leaving a remainder as ‘an offense leaving no remainder’… an offense leaving no remainder as ‘an offense leaving a remainder’… a serious offense as ‘a not-serious offense’… a not-serious offense as ‘a serious offense.’ On the basis of these eighteen grounds they pull away, pull apart, they perform a separate uposatha, perform a separate Invitation, perform a separate Community transaction. To this extent the Community is split.”—Cv.VII.5.2

Devadatta caused the first schism on the basic of Vinaya rules. The Vajjian monks caused the second schism on the same ground. The Sangha established by the Sakyamuni was attacked several times from within.

Vibhajjavādi Dhamma Missions

Emperor Asoka sent forth nine missionaries to nine different countries to propagate the religion of the Buddha and crowned it with success... also the Bhikkuni Sangha in Aparantaka, Suvannabhumi and Ceylon.

Emperor Asoka sent his son and daughter, Arahant Maha Mahinda Thera and Arahant Sanghamitta Theri, to Sri Lanka, where the events of the 3rd Buddhist Council were recorded.
"Arahant Mahinda, who introduced the Buddhadhamma to Sri Lanka, is the Redactor of the Buddhapåjàva in Sinhala Buddhism."
Sri Lanka became a foothold of the Dhamma-Vinaya Tradition. Suvannabhumi was also a foothold where Thera-vada Buddhism thrives presently.

Vibhajjavādi Dhamma Paṭisambhidā-ñāṇa

Analytical Knowledge (Paṭisambhidā-ñāṇa) allows the arahants to reason and teach in detail analytically. Understanding the nature of the Teachings of the Buddha and the Sangha, Venerable Moggaliputta Tissa Thera described them as Vibhajjavādis. That is Theravada, the doctrine of the arahants. Dhamma paṭisambhidā-ñāṇa is the ability to analytically and in detail explain the nature of reality.
The Buddha as an awakened sage is neither a theorist nor a philosopher. Theravada is not philosophy. The Buddha is an arahant.
The Buddha's disciples, who are also arahants, know the Four Noble Truths through their own observation and release from delusion. Knowing modern views and modern science is not their task. They are not philosophers and philosophical scholars. They do not claim to possess omniscience.

Titthiya Sutta (Sectarians):

[The Buddha advises the monks,] you should answer those wanderers of other sects in this way, ‘Friends, passion carries little blame and is slow to fade. Aversion carries great blame and is quick to fade. Delusion carries great blame and is slow to fade. [Thanissaro Bhikkhu]

3.1. Kaccānagotta Sutta (Right View)

Kaccānagotta Sutta Pali:

‘sammādiṭṭhi sammādiṭṭhī’ti, bhante, vuccati. Kittāvatā nu kho, bhante, sammādiṭṭhi hotī’’ti?... ‘‘‘Sabbaṃ atthī’ti kho, kaccāna, ayameko anto. ‘Sabbaṃ natthī’ti ayaṃ dutiyo anto. Ete te, kaccāna, ubho ante anupagamma majjhena tathāgato dhammaṃ deseti – ‘avijjāpaccayā saṅkhārā; saṅkhārapaccayā… L. Feer, Saṃyutta-nikāya,V. 16 —[copied from Early Buddhism: A New Definition (Vijitha Kumara, page 130)]

• sammādiṭṭhi : right view
• What is the right view, bhante?

Sarvāstivāda

Sarvāstivāda means "those who claim that everything exists" [...] the Sarvāstivādins suggest that "everything," that is all conditioned factors (dharma), "exist" and can exert causal efficacy in the three time periods of the past, present, and future. [Sarvastivada And Mulasarvastivada (Encyclopedia.com)]

The main Sarvāstivādi concept 'all dhamma exist in all three times' was familiar to the Buddha, not because He taught it, but because He rejected it.

'Everything exists': That is one extreme. 'Everything doesn't exist': That is a second extreme. Avoiding these two extremes, the Tathagata teaches the Dhamma via the middle: From ignorance as a requisite condition come fabrications (saṅkhārā). From fabrications as a requisite condition comes consciousness. [Kaccānagotta Sutta (SN 12:15) (Thanissaro Bhikkhu)]

Somehow, that concept, despite the Buddha's famous rejection, came to associate with Buddhism once again, not because the Buddha taught it, but the outsiders made it as if the Buddha accepted it.
We, too, must reject the notion of 'everything exists' just the way the Buddha rejected it. The rejection is also present in the paṭicca samuppāda, as He explains:

Imagine two sheaves of reeds the one leaning against the other. In the same way consciousness depends on named-shapes, named shapes depend on consciousness [...] birth depends on existing, aging and death depend on birth — the coming into existence of upset, grief, lamentation, pain and misery. [...] If, however, friend, I were to remove one of those sheaves of reeds one would fall down if I were to remove the other the other would fall down. — SN 5.67 [Dependant Uprising, Downbound Dependent Own-making (Dependent Origination, Conditioned Genesis, The Causal Law),

The Paṭicca Samuppāda provides two sheaves of reeds that support each other, but one of them can be removed to topple them both. When they are toppled, we cannot say everything exists. The Buddha's Dhamma, which shows us the four Paramattha, is nothing like a "dharma theory" that was created by the Sarvāstivādis.
Kaccānagotta Sutta continues:

[The Buddha:] By & large, Kaccayana, this world is supported by (takes as its object) a polarity, that of existence & non-existence. But when one sees the origination of the world as it actually is with right discernment, 'non-existence' with reference to the world does not occur to one. When one sees the cessation of the world as it actually is with right discernment, 'existence' with reference to the world does not occur to one. "By & large, Kaccayana, this world is in bondage to attachments, clingings (sustenances), & biases

3.2. Vibhajyavāda & The Present Dhamma

The Tibetan Buddhist Encyclopedia:

vibhajyavāda; A school of thought doctrinally opposed to the Sarvāstitvāda. holds that the present dharma-s alone exist. However, some among them like the followers of the Kāśyapīya, concede that the past karma that have not yet given fruit (adatta-phala) can also be said to exist.

Here is a part of Magganga Dipani by Ledi Sayadaw:

kammassakata samma-ditthi Sabbesatta kammadayada, kamayoni, kammabandhu kammappatisarana yam kammam karissanti kalyanam va papakam va tassadayada bhavissanti. Sabbe satta kammassaka: There exist such properties as elephants, horses, vehicles, cattle, fields, buildings, gold, silver, jewels, etc. Those properties can be said to belong to us in the present existence before we pass away. But when we pass away those properties do not accompany us beyond death. They are like properties which we borrow for some time for our use. They are liable to destruction during the present existence. As those properties which beings possess do not accompany them to their new existences, they cannot be claimed as properties belonging to those beings. The Buddha therefore said, 'sabbe satta kammassaka.' The only property of all beings that accompanies them is their own volitional action... [Ledi Sayadaw explains the entire thing here.]

• Venerable Mogok Sayadaw warned us to avoid sassata ditthi, the belief in permanence (nicca), 'eternity-belief'. Based on his explanation: A kamma (action) exists while it is happening between the start and the end. For example, feeding an animal: this action exists only while that animal is fed. That action cannot exist before and after that animal is fed. However, as if following the doers, the potential effect of certain wholesome and unwholesome kamma (volition) is inevitable.

Dhammacakkappavattana Sutta

Furthermore, bhikkhus, this is the dukkha ariya·sacca: jāti is dukkha, jarā is dukkha (sickness is dukkha) maraṇa is dukkha, association with what is disliked is dukkha, dissociation from what is liked is dukkha, not to get what one wants is dukkha; in short, the five upādāna'k'khandhas are dukkha.

• The Buddha introduced the Dukkha Sacca in His first sermon.
• Vedayita-dukkha: The truth is dukkha are birth, aging, death, association with what is disliked, dissociation from what is liked, and not to get what one wants.
• Bhayattha-dukkha: The truth is the constant fear of these dukkha is also dukkha.
• Due to the past wholesome and unwholesome kamma, one gets birth, aging, death, etc.
• However, Beings born in the sugati-loka do not suffer from birth, aging, and bodily pain (kayika-dukkha), as these dukkha do not exist there.
• The past unwholesome kamma do not affect these beings during their existence in sugati-loka, especially the arupa-brahmas.
• The Buddha understood the followers of Nigaṇṭha (the Nigaṇṭhas) did not know the existence of the sugati-loka. Thus, they were speculators who fell into sassatavada (eternalism) and ucchedavada (nihilism/annihilation). Details can be read here: The Buddhist Critique of Sassatavada and Ucchedavada: The Key to a proper Understanding of the Origin and the Doctrines of early Buddhism (Y. Karunadasa).
• In the Devadaha Sutta, the Buddha pointed out the mistakes of these Nigaṇṭhas.

Devadaha Sutta (the Law of Kamma)

[MN 101] “‘So, friends, it seems that you don’t know that you existed in the past, and that you did not not exist… you don’t know what is the abandoning of unskillful qualities and the attainment of skillful qualities in the here & now. That being the case, it is not proper for you to assert that, “Whatever a person experiences—pleasure, pain, or neither pleasure nor pain—all is caused by what was done in the past. Thus, with the destruction of old [kamma] through asceticism, and with the non-doing of new actions, there will be no flow into the future. With no flow into the future, there is the ending of [kamma]. With the ending of [kamma], the ending of [dukkha]. With the ending of [dukkha], the ending of feeling. With the ending of feeling, all [dukkha] will be exhausted.” (Thanissaro Bhikkhu)

• If the present is completely conditioned by the past [kamma] and if we could not break that condition to do new kamma in a condition not determined by the past, then at this present we could not even do anything intentionally (kamma) as our action would be restrained by the past kamma.

A Vibhajjavādi cannot accept Sarvāstivāda's notion of the three times:

all dharmas exist in the past, present and future, the "three times".

Past and future exist at this present moment implies they merge with the present time. Yesterday and tomorrow are today and they are so every day without meaning one can live yesterday and tomorrow today. If one's injury healed yesterday, both injury and healing exist today, right now. For three times doctrine (Sarvāstivāda), dead people are dead, alive and exist at all stages and every moment of time. Even though one has reborn countless times, one still lives in the past lives and also the future lives. One has lived the past infinity and the future infinity. As the future has also been lived, there is no way to change the future, so what will happen will happen — according to the God one believes. After one passes away, one will relive the same life again and again countless times in the past and the future. Someone who will become a Buddha is already a Buddha. Someone who will go to hell is already in hell while living this life as a human.
Rational and irrational people, including the physicists, philosophers, writers and filmmakers, took the doctrine of three times seriously and imagined time machines.
Assuming kamma (action) exists constantly (past, present and future) constitutes sassata ditthi (eternalism). Assuming actions and their effects do not exist constitutes ahetukaditthi (view of uncausedness) — see the 8th question on page181 of this book: Milindapanha: kammaphalaatthibhavapanha. King Milinda asked many questions about kamma. The answers of wisemen and philosophers of the time did not satisfy the king. He got the answers only when he met Venerable Nagasena; see A SEARCH FOR THE LEARNED (TALENT HUNT), pages12-16.
Venerable Nagasena explained how the future is yet to exist:

Can anyone point out the fruits that a tree has not yet produced, saying: “Here they are, there they are”?” [See 3.2. QUESTION REGARDING VALIDITY OF FRUIT AND RESULT OF WHOLESOME AND UNWHOLESOME]

Real is the present; the past is gone; the future is yet to exist. That is the knowledge of the arahants.
Every action has the process of existence: birth, decay and death. Understanding anicca can abandon sakkaya ditthi.
Sakkaya ditthi is a sense with which one perceives a nama-rupa complex as me, you, he, she, it, cat, dog and so on.

Right View according to the Sakyamuni

The Buddha and His disciples visited Vesāli, the capital of the Vajjians, several times, and many arahants were made there. Saccaka, who the Buddha addressed as Aggivessana, was a famous Jain teacher of the Licchavi rājās. They accompanied Saccaka when he went to challenge the Buddha. There a famous debate on anattavada occurred, as recorded in the famous Cula-Saccaka Sutta.

[The Buddha asked,] “Well, Aggivessana, when you say that [rūpa] is self, do you have power over that [rūpa]. Can you have your [rūpa] be any different than it is?” Saccaka could not answer and remained silent [...] “Released they are endowed with unsurpassed Right View, unsurpassed practice, and unsurpassed release. Released, they honor and respect the Tathagata in this manner: The Buddha teaches the Dhamma for awakening (to Four Noble Truths), the Buddha teaches the Dhamma to develop restraint, the Buddha teaches the Dhamma for developing tranquility, the Buddha teaches the Dhamma for ending samsara (ignorance). The Buddha teaches the Dhamma for total unbinding.” (John Haspel).

• [rūpa]: The four mahabhuta (solid, liquid, gas, heat), each changes according to its nature.
• Self (atta) means the owner or arbitor of the five aggregates of clinging.
• do you have power over that [rūpa]: None of the five aggregates is self (atta).
• Vesāli became a Buddhist capital after the debate. But not all the Nigaṇṭhas were happy. Their attack on the Buddha and the Sangha never stopped. They succeeded only after a few centuries later.

3.3. QUESTION REGARDING VALIDITY OF FRUIT AND RESULT OF WHOLESOME AND UNWHOLESOME

(kammaphalaatthibhavapanha page181) 8. King Milinda said: “If, O Venerable Nagasena, with the (present) Mind-body-complex (nama-rupa) either wholesome or unwholesome kammical actions were performed where will the fruit and result of those actions (kamma) be located?” “The fruit and result of kammical actions tend to follow the Mind-body-complex, O King, like a shadow that never leaves it.” (So replied the Elder.) “Now what do you think, O King? Can any one point out the fruits which a tree has not yet produced, saying: “Here they are, there they are”?” (So asked the Elder.) “Not possible it is, O Venerable One.” (So replied the king.)

• Shadow means the potential. As long as the tree exists, the potential of fruiting of that tree exists. The fruits will be on that tree, not elsewhere. The potential never leaves the tree.
• Mahayana created the concept of Ālayavijñāna (storehouse consciousness).
  • Ālayavijñāna is also regarded as the store house of vāsanas and karmic tendencies (vāsanāparibhāvita and sarvabījaka). However, it is neither the permanent identity of a person nor a form of collective unconscious. Continuous build-up and discharge of karmic tendencies cause the ever-changing nature of ālaya-vijñāna. [Wisdom Lib]
• Compare ālayavijñāna with indestructable buddha-nature. Buddha-nature is also vijñāna/citta. Awareness is Buddha-nature.
  • [Breakthrough Sermon, Bodhidharma:] The Sutra of the Ten Stages says, “In the body of mortals is the indestructible buddha-nature [...] Our buddha-nature [the self-nature of Buddha] is awareness: to be aware and to make others aware. To realize awareness is liberation.
  • be­cause garbha (which nearly always means 'embryo' in Sanskrit) is translated by ts'ang, ( = 'womb'; lit. 'storehouse'), a certain vacuum was created in the Chinese vocabulary which the terms fo hsing and fo hsin ( = buddha-citta) neatly filled. [Rawlinson, Andrew. "The Ambiguity of the Buddha-Nature Concept in India and China."]
  • Ālayavijñāna belongs to or a part of buddha-nature (buddha-citta).
  • According to the concept of citta-matrata

THE NIYAMA-DIPANI The Manual of Cosmic Order Mahathera Ledi Sayadaw

[Kamma-Niyama] The moral order--Kamma (action) is that by which men execute, deeds, good or evil, meritorious or the opposite. What is it ? It is volition (cetana), moral or immoral. We are told in the Pali texts: 'By action, Bhikkhus, I mean volition. It is through having willed that a man does something in the form of deed, speech or thought.'

The nama-rupa process, which occurs according to the law of paticcasamuppada (Pratītya-Samutpāda), is like a tree; See 2.3. PATICCASAMUPPADA. The nama-rupa process, which occurs due to the niyama(s) other than kamma niyama, is outside the law of paticcasamuppada but not unrelated.

Naked Kassapa

The ascetic Acelakassapa put forward four theories of origination of suffering and wanted to know Buddha’s answer to them. [Dependent Origination and the Buddhist Theory of Relativity (Kottegoda S. Warnasuriya (page 154)]
"'He who performs the act also experiences [the result]' — what you, Kassapa, first called 'suffering caused by oneself' — this amounts to the Eternalist[3] theory. [Acela Sutta: Naked Kassapa]

An action was done by a doer, not someone else. However, the doer and the action (kamma) can exist only during the action is being done, not before or after. The doer happens to exist because of doing. The doer and doing exists at the same time. Action and doer don't exist outside doing or before or after the action is done.
Saying there is no doer falls into ahetukavada and probably uccedavada, too, as 'no doer' means 'nobody is responsible' to take the consequences. When the action is done, it becomes a seed that grows into a tree (as nama-rupa process) according to the paticcasamuppada law. The fruiting or consequences of volition (kamma/seed) will appear on this tree.

Of Causal Genesis [Mahathera Ledi Sayadaw (contrinues)]

Paticcasamuppada is Causal Genesis or Dependent Origination (Process). The key words are depdendent and process. The process depends on the action done by the doer, which no longer exists by the next stage of the process. For example, a sound comes out after the drummer hit a drum with a drumstick. The birth of the sound is dependent on the hitting process, but the sound itself is independent to be in the law of impermanence—no butterfly-effect here.
That is how things exist, but not "everything exists".

My (31F) boyfriend (37M) had a terrible relationship with his ex where she cheated, pulled a gun out on him, etc. regardless of the things that happened between them they got married. My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year and his divorce has taken about 2 years it was finalized a few months ago.
Now I have been married and divorced but my kids dad and I get along great. Coparenting relationship is solid. Him and his ex…awful..she is awful constant belittling just not a nice person.
Now this is a little background my issue that I have is that my boyfriend is very insecure and refuses to admit it. He consistently tries to “catch” me doing something “wrong”
For instance today I went out had lunch with my brother during my lunch break and came home, didn’t pick up the kids till 3 My boyfriend was at school he came home around 5pm and laid next to me and started scrolling through his phone aggressively. Then the questions started with our camera system. “How come the cameras recorded you leaving but not coming home?” “Did you delete the videos off the camera app?” I answered his questions short but what really irritated me is when he began to try to call my “bluff” “Oh I found the button to recover deleted videos.” “Yep right here I’m recovering deleted videos….” I knew what he was doing so I just stayed quiet…nobody ever deleted videos and I just said maybe the internet turned off when I was gone. No idea. Later on in the day he asked why I was upset and quiet, and I made the mistake of opening my big mouth. I explained to him I’m so tired of being treated like a cheating whore and that isn’t the first time he’s trying to catch me doing “something”. I mentioned to him that I hate paying for the sins of another, that what his ex did to him was wrong but it wasn’t something I did. He of course as always didn’t admit that this something he does. That he isn’t insecure because of his ex. And it isn’t true that he doesn’t try to “catch” me.
I also have two jobs and work over 72 hrs a week. So when I’m home I really enjoy just being home. I feel this is ruining my peace and I just want him to understand where I’m coming from…I love him but like I mentioned to him, I don’t feel like he’s my friend anymore more like a jailer.
My question is how do I fix this issue, is there anything I can do?

TLDR - I rant about not understanding userspace tools that well and then ask "how can I reason about being efficient at doing linux things and how can I quickly gain insight that answers critical questions - why does this exist? why is this the best approach? how does it work?"
I fully expect that the answer to this is because "because things are harder to manage at the kernel level" but I'm still interested in the details.
I'm a computer science major that used to work on web backend before slowly moving towards systems-level programming. I mostly write C++ now (completely self taught) and have taken up learning linux tools like tmux, vim, sed, awk and also nice community-developed tools like fzf and zoxide to ease my dev workflow.
One thing I find in common between everything linux (or should I say posix) related is that there seems to be a large paradigm shift away from web-oriented languages that drive fast software development. A huge side effect seems to be modularity.
I'm struggling to put into words what I mean here so I'll lead by examples. Rather than being about *why* I should use it, linux-based software seems to be "we exist and if you think you might need us, start reading manpages". There seems to be an implicit trust that the software maintainers have made good decisions that isn't exactly user-facing.
Take tmux for example. I recently tried to implement primeagen's harpoon workflow - which in 1 sentence makes tmux sessions accessible through pre-homerow (and also vim buffers). I mucked around with trying to make sessions sort themselves temporally like :choose-tree does before realizing that choose-tree has its own internal implementation that for whatever reason isn't publicly available. Tmux is a terminal multiplexer that is powerful because of its configurability. Wouldn't it benefit users to control the main display board?
C++ might be another example. The language is massively obfuscated as I'm sure many of you know, and I've spent many nights reading books on move semantics, generics, template argument deduction, you name it (scott meyers and vandervoorde ftw). And yes C++ isn't linux specific but I feel follows very similar systems principles in regards to its development (and is in fact tied very closely with microarch)
The common thing I'm seeing here is the word *why*. I feel that if documentation or discussion around the language started with justification for it being there in the first place, that all reasoning follows.
I also find it hard to believe that learning linux tools isn't the kind of skill that applies to "fear not the man who practices a thousand kicks ones but one kick a thousand times". I see linux tools as just that - tools, an end to a means - and don't see the merit of spending dozens of hours learning the intricacies of some tool when it just needs to do one thing well (core linux principle). Kind of like how the best mathematicians and learners don't memorize proofs but instead make things intuitive to them so that they can rederive them at a whim.
Another aspect that systems-level dev that I think does differently is incorporate many more "paradigms" into their workings. Whereas high-level languages like Java, golang, python have a "shtick" (garbage collection and strong typing, easy scripting language with duck typing, etc) the tree of concepts seems to branch much more heavily. I feel that the latter is much more economical especially when my job is to get a certain thing done, not learn obscure things (thought it is fun)
A final point that I might make is that the linux ecosystem of tools constantly makes me feel like I don't understand what I'm doing. I have a feeling that the right workflow is something like trying new things on a need-to basis but I constantly feel like I don't know what's going on even after reasonably understanding what terminal multiplexers, tiling window managers, shells, temrinal emulators, etc are. I feel that one of the hallmarks of a good engineer is being able to answer the 5 key W's - why, what, how, etc. My answer is mostly "because I don't understand the linux ecosystem to be able to justify why what I am doing is efficient" - and "I find it hard to believe there is something better) is not adequate justification
So, all of this might be a massive skill issue. And I'm sorry if this comes of as demeaning in any way to you guys but time is fleeting and as much as I love tinkering with my config and learning obscure stuff I think it's in my best interest to be learning efficiently so I can be the best engineer possible.
So, I am curious as to two things

• how do you go about reasoning through doing linux stuff?
  
• why aren't linux tools more modular, task-motivated, and better documented?
  

I’m 26 and from the UK.
My hobbies include gaming, football, I like true crime/history, I am a massive horror fan and I love everything creepy/scary.
I love being outside, finding places to explore and spending time with my dog. I also have a lot of tattoos and love to see other people’s work too!
I’m down to talk about just about anything, not just my own hobbies. I like hearing about others interests too, answer questions or I’m happy to just listen to you rant.
Send me a message if you want to talk😊

I’m 26 and from the UK.
My hobbies include gaming, football, I like true crime/history, I am a massive horror fan and I love everything creepy/scary.
I love being outside, finding places to explore and spending time with my dog. I also have a lot of tattoos and love to see other people’s work too!
I’m down to talk about just about anything, not just my own hobbies. I like hearing about others interests too, answer questions or I’m happy to just listen to you rant.
Send me a message if you want to talk😊

I’m 26 and from the UK.
My hobbies include gaming, football, I like true crime/history, I am a massive horror fan and I love everything creepy/scary.
I love being outside, finding places to explore and spending time with my dog. I also have a lot of tattoos and love to see other people’s work too!
I’m down to talk about just about anything, not just my own hobbies. I like hearing about others interests too, answer questions or I’m happy to just listen to you rant.
Send me a message if you want to talk😊

I was looking for a job for the summer to pay my tuition and was pretty desperate to found one knowing I am missing a couple 1000$ to be able to pay it. I have found one not too long ago in centertown, awesome location, doing something I love and honestly really nice people and pace. I was told the training was 2 days. So I did my first shift and everything went smootly. They told me I was good for someone with no experience in the field in a professionnal level and told me they wanted to complete my training on a busy night and that they'd make me cover for someone. I then went to that shift but about 45 minutes into it, I felt really bad and passed out. They took good care of me but they really seemed freaked out. They started asking me a bunch of questions if it happened often, why did it happen and I insisted that I could work and that this happened before but it rarely does but they insisted that it was too dangerous for them to keep me on the floor so they sent me back home telling me they'd contact me so we can complete my training. I then went home and waited a few days but no answer. I hit up my new boss and ask him about it and he then tells me that its not gonna work out. I had a bad gut feeling when I left that day and that is why I kept insisting that I could work cuz it really seemed to bother my boss and tbh I really feel like it was because of that because their attitude towards me completely changed from the moment this incident happened. Its just so unfair and I really can't believe I could lose a job in such a ridiculous way.

I'm am currently looking for work and anticipating job interviews in the near future. I'd like some advice on how to answer questions about being let go from a previous job for sexual harassment. Context below. Thanks in advance.
I (M, 47, located in TX) had been at this job for almost 5 years, never any issues. I met a woman at a work-related networking event. She worked for a vendor of ours. Conversation seemed fun & flirtatious. We exchanged business cards & hers had her cell phone.
I texted her that evening and we began to chat. Again, the conversation seemed flirtatious to me (not sexual at all but very friendly). I asked her if she'd like to meet for dinner some night. She declined & said she wasn't interested. I immediately stopped texting her but we did continue to run into each other at work events without issue.
Fast forward almost 2 years and I get called into my boss' office. I'm being fired for sexual harassment. Very little explanation, they wouldn't tell me what I'd done or who had reported me. I had honestly forgotten about asking the woman out & being turned down. It wasn't until after I'd been denied unemployment that I discovered it was the woman I'd asked out several years before.
I was understandably confused but I've moved on. They felt they needed to protect themselves and that's fine. How do I answer questions related to why I left that position? I don't want to mislead or lie but I don't want to miss out on opportunities for something that happened (now) 7 years ago. Thanks for any advice.

Intro

Hello, I'm Goody. I make TFT content on YouTube, Twitch, and occassionally Reddit.

This time I'm here to discuss Zoe Reroll, a comp that has caused a little bit of a stir on the PBE due to her buffs in 14.10

I honestly think Zoe is insanely OP now (I mean just watch this clip I posted a few days ago).

But there are those that say Zoe is a terrible unit

The most prominent of which is Mortdog who said "Stop playing Zoe. She's not good. Despite the buff even"
(VOD Timestamp of this here)

Challenger Zoe One-Trick: LIGhtYgo

I've been playing a lot of Zoe Reroll on the PBE, but recently in my stream CuLe TV told me about a Challenger on the Japanese server who one-tricks Zoe Reroll called LIGhtYgo. His lolchess page is here if you want to read it
And coincidentally, I've been playing the same comp they play amongst others that I'll share with you today

TLDR:

If you want a TLDR, this timestamped section should cover that

VIDEO FORM

(The video also has Spanish and Vietnamese Subtitles)
Disclaimer: I tested these comps on the PBE and I have not played them in ranked. For transparency, here is my lolchess
And my Exalted only account here

(Highly recommend trying this btw, it's very fun)

But let's get started!

Ghoe Reroll (Ghostly Zoe)

So let's start with what LIGhtYgo plays which is this comp here
(Teambuilder here)
I couldn't find any VODs to link from LIGhtYgo but here's some of my gameplay of this comp on the PBE
From looking at their match history, LIGhtYgo tends to reroll Shen + Zyra or Zoe + Illaoi (1 tank + 1 carry) but sometimes they manage to 3 star everything alongside Aatrox.

Give Zoe Shiv

LIGhtYgo also frequently itemises Zoe with Statikk Shiv, 3 star or otherwise, to stack Zoe's passive as much as possible.

Passive: Kills increase the number of ricochets by 1 for the rest of combat.

Now, I should mention that Zoe's tooltip here is misleading and frankly incorrect. Zoe gains more ricochets if she participates in a kill, also known as takedowns.
And that is why Statikk Shiv is so phenomenal for Zoe. Not only is she reducing the MR of enemy units (helps Ghostly and your Magic Damage Dealers) but the damage from Shiv will give Zoe takedown credit once those enemy units perish.
So, even with just a Shiv and at 2 star, Zoe can be very impactful as her passive continues to easily stack.
Thus Zoe has great synergy with other AP carries like Zyra, Morgana, Teemo, Alune etc as they soften enemy units for each other to clean up.
And so Zoe is an incredible secondary carry as she needs very little to come online
You can infer this from LIGhtYgo's match history as they tend to succeed more when Zoe isn't their primary carry but rather secondary.
Although the buff to Zoe in 14.10 should change that, especially combined with the buffs to Ghostly, Warden, Aatrox, Behemoth and Jax.

Zoe's Weaknesses

From my games, I've felt Zoe has 2 main weaknesses

• Firstly, she can struggle into tanky frontliners as it'll take her more time to stack her passive.
• Secondly, Zoe can lose 1v1s as her ult will no longer ricochet (no targets left to bounce to)

These weaknesses can make Zoe feel very binary: - she either gets 3/4 takedowns and nukes - or she gets stuck, gets no passive stacks, and does nothing

Spooky Solution

But that’s why Ghostly can provide so much value to Zoe.
Those Spectres will help Zoe get through tanks and once they're concentrated, Zoe's single target will nuke which even allows her to win those 1v1s

Problems with Ghoe Reroll

From what I tried on the PBE, I did find this comp to be very powerful at level 9. However it could be a struggle getting there as you also need to reroll Zoe who can be contested by Fortune, Arcanist, and Storyweaver players

Is it a Player Diff?

I also find there to be a really odd tempo where I need to find Zoe 3 but also hit level 9 to find Udyr. I did learn later that you don't really need to 3 star Zoe to get to 9, and it's certainly not impossible to hit Zoe 3 at level 9.
Although, it seems that LIGhtYgo resolves this problem by keeping the option of Zyra Reroll open. (They play boards akin to this one occasionally)
Also, sometimes the Inkshadow item doesn't tend to be that useful, especially if it's Tattoo of Bombardment, as you don't have an AD carry.
Lastly, the position of the Ghostly units is really important so the Spectres concentrate onto Zoe's target(s). This can be really awkward if your primary Ghostly tank has a Stoneplate.
I have lost games because I moved Zoe away from my Ghostly units last second :(
But by far the biggest problem I have found is how much better the comp becomes at 9 than level 8. I personally find rerolling at level 8 to be the easiest to find 3 star Illaoi, Zoe, and Galio 2 whilst also being able to field 8 units which enable many important synergies.
Essentially, I don't like rerolling at either 7 or 8 with this comp. So I decided to comp up with a new comp to address this problem which is Altruist Arcanist.

4 Arcanist 3 Altruist Zoe Reroll

So here's a new variant of Zoe Reroll that has an incredibly strong level 8 (you play Rakan at 9) that gives you more time to reroll and find Zoe 3. This makes this comp so much easier to play and in turn, I have had so much more success with this variation particularly.
Teambuilder here
[Here's the full game from that clip with this comp]
This board also has a primary tank option between Amumu or Illaoi so you can play around whichever you manage to 3 star.
Although your secondary carry here is Lux who also holds your utility items like Morello and Shiv.

The Lissandra Nerfs really hurt...

Honestly, this may be extreme bias due to a bad few games, but I find a Lux 2 to be more reliable than post-nerf Lissandra. Lux feels like she needs a lot less to function better as she CC's more units, usually targets and slows down the enemy carry, and softens up enemy units for Zoe.
(VOD of why I don't like Lissandra)
The combination of Lux, Amumu, and Illaoi feels incredibly solid
Now the reason why I don't give Zoe Shiv on this board is due to a few reasons - Altruists prolong combat due to the mana reave, damage reduction, ally healing, and the trait resistances - That allows your frontline to be super beefy especially since the resistances are great for Bruisers/Wardens (loads of EHP) - Lux will have more AS than Zoe (Lux: 0.7x1.5=1.05 vs Zoe: 0.75x1.2=0.9) - And finally, opening up that item slot allows you to give Zoe a third damage item

Why not itemise Soraka?

Your secondary carry items should be going to Lux as she has more AP from Arcanist.
While Soraka can do a lot of damage, you only really care about her mana reave because it's such a powerful utility ability.
Regardless, Soraka will gain AP naturally from her passive as your frontline will continue to heal during combat. As she gains more AP, she heals your frontline more, who then stall for longer.
Lastly, the following 2 combinations are literally perfect for Altruist Arcanist.

Lux, Teemo, Thresh, Volibear, Galio, Morgana Darius, Bard, Soraka, Galio, Lissandra

4 Warden 6 Arcanist

Here's the board for this one
Teambuilder
(Here's some Footage of this Comp in Action)

Meta Report from Khym and YBY1

In the 14.10 Meta Report by Khym and YBY1, Arcanist Zoe is described as an Easy Top 4 Comp (if I'm reading that correctly)
Khym also has a guide on how to play Zoe/Illaoi RR here
And what's great here is that, again, as you reroll you have option between Amumu or Illaoi 3 as your tank (however Illaoi is better due to the Arcanist AP)
Also, with the 4 Warden buff, this frontline feels great and buys plenty of time for Zoe to scale.
And this variation certainly has the highest ceiling out of all the comps if you get a Porcelain Spatula

6 Arcanist, 4 Warden, 4 Porcelain is extremely powerful.

Luckily, you can easily pivot into this board from Altruist Arcanist but pivoting is a tad more difficult to do if you're playing Ghoe.
Similarly, both the Warden and Altruist boards can tech in Hwei at 8 to make hitting the 3 stars easier.
4 Warden Hwei 4 Arcanist 2 Altruist Hweimothy
So if you're low rolling Zoe, Hwei can easily save the day.
Regardless, all 3 comps make up for at least one of Zoe's weaknesses. They either buy her plenty of time to scale or they tremendously enable her damage and, in turn, her passive.
And, at the very least, Zoe is great item holder due to her buffed passive
Speaking of which, let's talk about Zoe's items now.

Zoe's Items

Of course, as I've mentioned, you can give Zoe Shiv so she can get takedown credit and stack her passive quickly
But generally, MR reduction is necessary (even if it's not on her) so Zoe can kill units and stack her passive. Shiv is far more preferable to build but Ionic still does the job.
But I'm a simple guy, I want to see BIG damage numbers and huge ricochets, thus I forgo Shiv on Zoe for pure damage items.
But before we get into those items, let's talk about which casting item Zoe will want

Casting item: Shojin vs Adaptive Math

First cast:

Zoe is 0/60 and Shojin/Adaptive give 15 mana

Shojin:

0.75^-1x3 = 4 seconds

Adaptive:

0.75^-1x4 = 5.3 seconds

Second Cast onwards

Shojin:

0.75^-1x4 = 5.3 seconds

Adaptive:

10 mana after 0.7 seconds 40 mana every 3 autos every 4 seconds Then 1 more auto for 10 more mana
Thus Adaptive: 0.75^-1x4 = 5.3 seconds
So Shojin will get Zoe's first cast off sooner however after that Zoe's cast frequency between Adaptive and Shojin is the same.
Considering Adaptive gives more AP, is not dependant on auto attacking, will continue to generate mana even if Zoe gets stunned (or has to walk up) and it grants MR (useful against magic damage), I believe Adaptive is the superior mana generating item on Zoe if she has no bonus attack speed
If Zoe has just a Shiv, then her cast frequency is much faster [(0.75x1.2)^-1x4 = 4.4 seconds] with Shojin.

TLDR:

• Give Zoe Adaptive if you're going solely damage items on her (Rabadon/Archangel's + Jewelled Gauntlet)
• Give Zoe Shojin if she has any bonus attack speed (Nashor's/Shiv/Pumping Up)

AP item: Rabadon or Archangel's

Of course, Zoe is a Mage and so she wants as much AP as possible which is either Rabadon or Archangel’s
I prefer Rabadon because it's more upfront AP alongside a great damage amplifier. However Archangel's can be more realistic to build and eventually it will outscale Rabadon's AP.

Increase Casting/Damage Multiplier

Lastly, you can give Zoe an item to increase her casting frequency like Shiv or Nashor's Tooth. Both of these items maximise Zoe's Kill Participation.
Or you can give her more damage amp for more, well, damage. Those are items like Jewelled Gauntlet or even items like Guardbreaker or Giant Slayer.
Although if you go the pure damage route, you need Zoe 3 and a ton of AP, so Zoe can stack her passive by one shotting whatever she touches.

SUPER TDLR:

Generally great build : Shiv/Nashor's + Shojin + Rabadon/Jewelled
My favourite: Adaptive + Rabadon + Jewelled

Bonus: Luden's Tempest

Luden's Tempest feels amazing on Zoe. With her ricochets, she gets so much takedown credit so quickly with it and it's so much damage.
[Here's my gameplay of Luden's Zoe in action]
And what's nice is that Zoe formerly built Luden's in TFT's spinoff game League of Legends. So it's a great callback
Although I've never played Zoe before...can I pretend to have a sense of nostalgia?

Kayle Upgrade

It's Blue.
20 AP is 20 AP. You're already building Shred so Green is Redundant, and the Attack Speed from Red is only 12%.

Pivot Potential

Zoe's items are very flexible so if you don't hit Zoe 3, you can pivot them to other AP carries like Syndra, Azir, Lissandra and Lillia.
So you don't absolutely need to reroll Zoe, you can just as easily use Zoe to Fast 9 instead, especially around Storyweaver, and pivot into a Legendary board.

Fin.

That is all the information I currently have on Zoe Reroll
Hopefully this was helpful but I'd like to ask for your thoughts
What do you guys think about Zoe?

Do you think it's as OP as I believe or is Mortdog right?

Also, I usually do Patch Previews for each patch (for example here's my 14.10 patch preview), but I'm curious whether you guys would be interested if i made that into a Reddit post as well.
I imagine it'd be similar to how they do it on the LoL subreddit but I'd include my thoughts as well.
For example, I think Low Interest Rates is turbo giga insane in 14.10 because you can hit max interest rate at 2-6 (by the latest) at which point you're earning 6 gold a turn.
Lastly, I'm currently working on a Rek'sai reroll comp that is incredibly funny so look forward to that!
But yeah, I'll leave it on that note I think

Let me know if you have any questions!

I shall answer them as soon as i wake up lol

Thank you for reading <3

Hello Reddit Community,
I've encountered a persistent challenge in my role since being promoted and leading projects, and I'm seeking guidance on how to address it effectively with management. The concern revolves around the perception of my feedback as overly harsh or emotionally driven, rather than objective and constructive.
Here's a summary of the situation:

• As a leader, I strive to provide fair and objective feedback to new staff members, maintaining a detailed log of both positive and negative feedback for performance evaluations.

Particular example/context:

• One staff in particular - It seems there's a reliance on receiving explicit instructions before taking action, rather than showing initiative & proactively taking ownership of personal development & tasks. While it's natural to seek guidance at the start, and it’s ok to ask questions, demonstrating initiative in learning and task ownership is crucial for professional development.
• Despite investing considerable time in coaching and support, providing expectations, directions, resources, encouraging, a particular staff member has shown lack of confidence and exhibits reluctance in taking initiative and taking tasks more independently, and comprehending provided information, leading to repeated mistakes and seemingly lack of engagement during meetings.
• For example, after meetings where participants walked us through processes, this team member repeatedly asked questions whose answers were already provided verbatim during the session. Despite addressing this issue directly with the staff, emphasizing the importance of engagement during meetings and the necessity of comprehending provided information, and offering additional support, the behavior persisted.
• My feedback to this individual has been clear and direct, emphasizing the importance of some independence (to grow), critical thinking, and engagement in tasks.
• I provided clear direction via email, resources, and personal coaching sessions, aiming to foster independence and critical thinking. Furthermore, I make it a priority to offer support and guidance to new team members, recognizing that everyone has a learning curve when joining a project. I invested considerable time in this individual, including scheduled calls and ad hoc meetings for coaching and answering questions, encourage critical thinking. Adapted my approach & showed them how to do things correctly the first time.
• However, there's a recurring challenge in communication with management, where my feedback is perceived as harsh or emotionally driven rather than objective, which I believe stems from a misunderstanding of my intentions.

Here's where I need advice:

• How can I effectively communicate to management to dispel these assumptions and ensure that my efforts to provide constructive feedback are recognized?
• While I understand that I can't control assumptions, I want to convey my observations without sounding petty or complaining. I believe I've been fair in my approach, but perhaps there's room for improvement in my approach to mgmt.? Particularly- struggle with telling mgmt. my efforts –I will dedicate a lot of time to develop staff but they don’t see that or they don’t see the repeated questions, the ad-hoc calls, the discussions had – how do you even communicate that to mgmt. without sounding cheesy or like criticizing team member?

Any insights or suggestions on how to navigate this situation would be greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance for your guidance!

The yearly drug free workplace policy is making the rounds, and every employee is supposed to sign it. I had never given it any thought, but I have never worked for any other employer that made employees sign a policy like this every year. The wording in this gives me pause. I read in one of the legal subreddits lately to be very careful what you sign with regards to your employer. Ohio recently legalized the use of recreational marijuana. I believe the law states it is still up to the employer.
Acknowledgement of Receipt of Drug-Free Workplace Policy
Signing this form acknowledges that the employee has received a copy of Drug-Free Policy, has had the opportunity to discuss the Policy and have questions answered, and understands all the provisions in the Policy. Although it reflects current Policy regarding substance use, it may be necessary to make changes from time to time to best serve the needs of [company] However, any changes deemed necessary will be made in writing, and the modified Policy will be shared with every employee.
By my signature below, I acknowledge that I have received a copy of the Drug-Free Policy of [company] I understand that it is my obligation to read, understand and comply with the procedures and provisions contained within this Policy.
They make us sign another form prohibiting our use of medical cannabis as well, and it's wording is as follows:
Acknowledgement of Receipt of Medical Marijuana Policy
Ohio's medical marijuana law passed in 2016. As of September 8, 2016, it is legal for Ohio residents with certain medical conditions to use non-smoking forms of medical marijuana when recommended by an eligible physician. Once the law is full effective, eligible patients will be able to obtain medical marijuana at state-licensed dispensaries.
[Company] maintains a Drug Free Workplace Policy. As part of that policy, [company] uses a nine-panel drug screen when testing employees for pre-hire, post-accident and for reasonable suspicion, etc. Marijuana is one of the nine drugs tested on the panel. There is no test that distinguishes between medical and recreational use of marijuana. A positive test of marijuana, including when the use of marijuana is recommended by a licensed physician for medical purposes, is prohibited under policy.
By my signature below, I acknowledge that I have received a copy of the Drug Free Policy of and I understand that testing positive for medical and/or recreational marijuana is prohibited. I understand that it is my obligation to read, understand and comply with the procedures and provisions contained within this Policy.
Is having every employee signing these type of documents common practice? Is this something we have to sign? Is this something we can receive disciplinary action/be terminated for not signing?
For the record, I have never even used marijuana. They are just insistent about this document every year, and after reading that some employers are having employees sign documents that they don't really have to, I'm trying to be cautious.
TYIA for your time.

I passed! I almost can't believe it!
For reference, I have been working in HR for 20 years, but all of it has been in public schools in California, so a lot of the items don't apply to the work I do and/or is altered by California laws and local ordinances.
I mostly used the Pocket Prep app to prepare. I bought the PHR and SPHR Complete Study Guide but really only read it when I didn't know the answers to questions in the Pocket Prep app. I didn't feel like I studied enough, but when I took the test, I felt a little more confident.
I took the test at home and was thankful that my internet didn't go out. The online proctor process was easy and worked well. I felt very concious of being watched and felt like I had a million twitches and made a lot of weird faces. Once I accidentally started reading the question out loud to myself and they stopped me immediately.
I got through all of the questions in about an hour, and flagged many of them to go back and focus on. I went back through those and then went over all of the questions one more time and still had over 30 minutes left over.
No more than 10 minutes passed before I received my passing score and breakdown through email. I was surprised how well I did in one of the areas, which I felt was my weakest, and that I didn't do as well in the area I felt strongest in. I know I second-guessed myself on about 10 questions and flip flopped, which probably ended up with some of them wrong.
I'm so relieved it's done and so proud of myself for passing it.
#sphr #phr #humanresources #hr #certifiedhr #hrexam

Hi there! First time posting here. First, want to thank to all of the vets who volunteer their time answering all fur parents’ questions. The following post is about my dog Toby, a 15-year-old neutered Silky Terrier weighing 16.6 lbs.
Toby was recently diagnosed with malignant melanoma. We had a mass removed from his house a few weeks ago and biopsy came back with those results. Today, we had X-rays done on the chest and abdomen. Chest looked fine but they found an enlarged mass where his liver is. Given the size and his age, we’ve elected to give him the best quality of life for the time he has remaining on earth.
Otherwise, he’s eating, pooping and sleeping very normally with no signs of pain or discomfort.
My inquiry is about CBD for pain management and recommendations. I’ve read in various places that vets don’t recommend CBD treatments. However, when I asked my vet, she seemed open to the idea so long as I start off with a low dosage and monitor two weeks of usage at a time to see any improvements / changes. There are a lot of bogus CBD brands out there and I just want to make Toby as comfortable as possible.
Please let me know if you recommend or not, why and brands if you support going the CBD route. Thanks so much in advance!

Hello cat preparation family, I've been in this group for quite some time now and I tend to follow all the discussions, especially during this time of the year where you make arguably one of the most important decisions of your life, choosing a correct B school. I'm a senior from GLIM from back in the day, and I've been in touch with many recent alums that seek guidance from me concerning the further recourse of their journey. I saw the interim placement reports of GLIM, and I want to articulate a much more palatable version of the same ; let's decode it further shall we ?

• I personally know the person who got the highest package from this year's batch, he's from my hometown. Even he is awestruck with the numbers that have been flaunted on the website and the offer letter that he has signed.
• The point about new recruiters is true.
• They are claiming that they have placed over 90% of people, but in reality these include people who were on a sabbatical and they had to join their parent organisations after their course had end. So what they are doing is including these bunch of people in the placed category, but not including their post MBA salary in the calculation. This is because sabbatical peeps generally get much lower CTC's as compared what one can expect from campus. This year however, people who went back to their parent organisations have got a much higher salary as compared to a larger fraction of the cohort.
• GLIM advertises this as a list of participating companies, as many of them either ran away from campus after not knowing that a 1 year MBA could exist other than ISB, or they simply revoked their offers and fled. The list includes many companies that simply floated a JD and never bothered to show up, like Zopper, Neo Roots Design, Chola MS, Laxai Life sciences etc.
• They have simply cut pasted the placement statistics of the previous year by changing the headings. The top 75% didn't have a 18.3 LPA, it would at most be the top 10-15%.
• Most of the batch got anywhere between 8-15 LPA, with a significant portion of them oscillating around the lower end of the spectrum. This is true only when you don't consider the folks who are currently unplaced and unlooked after, then in that case the range would be between 0-15 LPA.
• The industry wide classification of placements is a blatant lie. NO ONE GOT PLACED IN STRATEGY CONSULTING UNLESS YOU CONSIDER ACCENTURE STRATEGY, which is barely a strategy consulting firm. Whatever consulting there is on campus is tech consulting. Strategy consulting roles didn't come to us 4-5 years before, it doesn't come now. That is because there is a serious positioning problem for great lakes where they inherently only get companies famous for analytics, and the Placement cell doesn't put in that extra effort to help change the positioning of the B school.
• Accenture, Delloite, Infosys and TCS did make the highest no. Of offers. This has been a main stay for many years now.
• No way in hell the average is 17.3 , it's gonna be somewhere between 14-15 based on the inputs of the outgoing batch students. The numbers never made sense back in the day, and it simply doesn't make sense today as well. Don't just use a pinch, take a bag of salt before you trust the placement reports of any B school in general, not just GLIM.
• I don't recall anyone getting a General Managerial role from campus, I might be wrong though someone from the current batch please correct me if you're seeing this.
• The worst part that I'm hearing that never happened during my time is that the placement cell are continuously calling the unplaced students and harassing them to opt out of the placement process. Many of them have genuinely not been given enough opportunities, and this was never the case with GLIM back in the day. The GLIM I knew was compassionate, and helpful. But with the recent change in management, things have sadly changed for the worse. I'm hearing things like management is calling up these unplaced students one by one, and playing divisive politics. People who don't want to comply, are being soft threatened by saying that either further opportunities won't be given to that student, or worse, their marksheet and other documents wouldn't be released from campus. The placement cell is digging their own grave, as such threats can be legally binding, and the person who is responsible for harassing these students and playing with their career can actually face jail time if the student chooses to go down the legal route. If the GLIM administration is seeing this, please don't destroy the career of so many kids who have come to y'all with hopes of kickstarting their career. I was actually proud of being a GLIM Alumnus for quite some time now, but recent incidents have compelled me to take a tougher stance w.r.t the matter. Don't do this, GLIM. Just Don't.

Feel free to add any more pointers. Many people won't say this, but I believe it's your duty to analyse both sides of the coin before you invest your hard earned money into an MBA program. Misinformation is a serious issue, and the only way we can combat this is by actually engaging with the alumnus, not by taking everything the placement cell has to say at face value. All the best for your upcoming B school journey guys.

I mentioned in a thread here in /osr that I have been running open table games since 2013. Radiant_Situation_32 asked for a post about how I was successful doing it. I'll try to keep this as brief as possible and then answer questions in the comments if anyone has any. (If anyone is even interested.) The biggest factors in my success are the last 3 bullets. AMA I guess?

• I started with Pathfinder Society in 2013. The first time I ever played a game it was an open, public table.
  
• The first time I ever ran a game was a Pathfinder Society table. I only ran the game because the GM ghosted the 6 players that showed up to play. I went into it completely unprepared having never seen the module until I picked it up to start running it. The players helped and were very understanding.
  
• After spending some time with Pathfinder Society I decided that the rules in Pathfinder were too restrictive. I got into an argument with the Venture Captain for the area about how many people I was allowed to have at the table and never ran PFS again.
  
• I missed that open table feel so I went looking for something else. I came across Dungeon Crawl Classics. I got a free copy of the full rulebook on Free RPG Day. I read it and LOVED it, but no one in my area was playing it.
  
• I decided to steal Pathfinder Society's model and start running local open tables for DCC. (Unaware at the time that Goodman Games has an organized play program called Road Crew).
  
• I partnered with a local game store and got permission to run my game. I advertised here on Reddit in my city's local sub, I advertised in a meetup for local gamers, and I posted on Facebook in a local geeks community group. That first game 3 people showed up. 2 of them were there because they are good friends and didn't want to see me fail at this new idea. The other guy saw the ad in the geek group and decided to come out. (I haven't seen him at a game since). So my first DCC game was 3 people. SUCCESS!
  
• I enjoyed it so much I did it again a month later. That time I advertised in all the same places and had close to 25 people show up. I guess showing it was on a regular schedule made people believe in it more. I found 2 other players willing to run games and we split the tables up as best we could.
  
• DCC was so popular I expanded to doing it twice a month. Then eventually ever Saturday. The other players were not willing to run games other than occasionally, so I dealt with it. Sometimes dealing with it meant running for 14 players at the same time. It sucked. It was awful, but not a single player got turned away. (Which was with my argument with the head of Pathfinder Society was about. I wanted too many players at my table according to PFS rules.)
  
• I expanded to running twice a week at the local game store. One weekend day, one week day.
  
• Shortly after my switch to twice a month I started a local Facebook group called Reno Dungeon Crawlers. I used that to advertise and find people to play in my games. (The group currently sits at 1200 members.)
  
• I allowed other people to find players and referees in the group. This helped expand my reach. My group is by far the most popular locally in terms of finding an RPG game. We have groups running games almost every day of the week who find players in that group.
  
• Since starting the group and running games on a regular basis I've run a number of different games. Metamorphosis Alpha, Original D&D, Swords & Wizardry (several different variations), Paranoia, Mork Borg, Old-School Essentials, OSRIC, and a bunch more I'm probably forgetting.
  
• My last completed campaign was a 2.5 year OSE campaign. I had a home brew world and used the hex map from the Isle of Dread to let the players hex crawl. When we finished that campaign they had established their own stronghold.
  
• Unless I was deathly ill, or the roads were no good (we get a lot of snow here) I never cancelled a game. I firmly believe this is a huge part of my success.
  
• I never turn away a player who wants to play. Even if I have too many players I ask them to bear with me and help me make it work. People are generally accommodating.
  
• On the converse side I never don't run the game. If a game is scheduled I run it, even if only 2 people show up, I run it. We make it work.
  

The bottom line is if you want it to be successful, you have to be dedicated to it and put in the work. The only time I haven't had active, public, open play tables is during covid when the store was shut down to gatherings. The weekend it opened back up I was masked up with my players back in the store.