I mean these are the neediest bunch, in all my years of customer service, I’ve ever dealt with. They don’t understand basic billing breakdown. They need their hands held through every damn thing. Can’t even Google a crash report online or call the police non-emergency line to get one. I have people ask me what their full term premium is, then ask me to break down monthly. Sure, let me get out a calculator just like you are capable of doing. Six month term. Divide the full premium by six. Boom! There you go, chief. People who own properties and businesses won’t keep their invoices filed throughout the year, then they suddenly need us to conjure up every payment receipt for said properties and businesses, at the last damn minute, for their taxes. You’d think, being a business owner, you’d know to file that shit yourself. For, duh, tax purposes. We have some of the same customers that call, literally, every single week. Meanwhile, before I was ever in this gig, I rarely called my insurance agency. People call wanting us to send their mortgage company proof of homeowners insurance but can’t provide a fax or email for us to send it to. “Can’t you just call my mortgage company and get that? I lost the notice that had that information.” Sure, I’d be happy to sit on hold with your mortgage company for 30 minutes. Never mind it’s just myself and one other person and our phones are ringing off the hook. Because you lost a document with important information on it.
If someone had told me that working as an insurance representative was more like babysitting full grown adults, I’d have stuck with something else. I mean…these people! I don’t know how they know what shoe goes on which foot…
Y’all are out here operating heavy machinery, owning homes, running businesses…but you can’t figure out your own monthly payments or get on the internet and get a crash report. I can’t with this.

Surviving Senior Psychopathy: Informant Reports of Deceit and Antisocial Behavior in Multiple Types of Relationships
Crossposting audience: Even less than narcissism research, there is a huge dearth of research on denial, the last and arguably most disturbing and long-lasting arm of genocide. Similarly, denial is employed by serial killers and is a type of extreme psychological violence that decouples the system of language's sensemaking from its actual sensebacking isomorphism to reality, while still parasiting sensemaking's credit until the lie's energy final dies, revealing the true devastating truth and the double violence to what truth means itself in the wake of the crime. Some lies last for disturbingly long amounts of time, however, in a reactive and aggressive insistence on sheer social power. This subreddit aims to study that disturbing psychosis at the heart of denial.
https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Donna-Andersen/publication/357633633_Surviving_Senior_Psychopathy_Informant_Reports_of_Deceit_and_Antisocial_Behavior_in_Multiple_Types_of_Relationships/links/61e88ba8dafcdb25fd39e1eb/Surviving-Senior-Psychopathy-Informant-Reports-of-Deceit-and-Antisocial-Behavior-in-Multiple-Types-of-Relationships.pdf
Ability to deceive without meaningfully realizing damages in empathy is predicted by ASPD
Antisocial personality disorder (ASPD) and its theoretical target construct, psychopathy (Sellbom & Boer, 2019), are related conditions in which affected individuals routinely violate social norms and standards and cause harm to others (Polaschek, 2015). Robert Hare, for instance, noted that, "Psychopaths are social predators who charm, manipulate, and ruthlessly plow their way through life, leaving a broad trail of broken hearts, shattered expectations, and empty wallets." (Hare, 1993, p. xi). The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5; American Psychiatric Association [APA, 2013]) summarizes antisocial personality disorder as a pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others, indicated by failure to conform to social norms, deceitfulness, impulsivity, irritability, recklessness, irresponsibility, and a lack of remorse
Specifically, the traits were callousness, aggression, manipulativeness, hostility, deceitfulness, narcissism, irresponsibility, recklessness, and impulsivity
AMPD-ASPD/Psychopathy. Respondents rated index individuals according to nine AMPD-ASPD criteria. Specifically, the traits were callousness, aggression, manipulativeness, hostility, deceitfulness, narcissism, irresponsibility, recklessness, and impulsivity. Although these criteria differ slightly from subsequent versions of the DSM-5 AMPD,
Unempathetic behavior including disappearing without explanation, switching love on and off, making promises out of manipulativeness with no intention to fulfill them, failing to acknowledge hurtful actions, repeatedly showing denial and evasion of them, and isolating the victim from support as well as being evasive or outright deceptive about their past
characteristics such as dishonesty, inconsistency, insincerity, or superficiality, as well as manipulative or unempathetic behavior. Such characteristics reflected the endorsement of items about the index individuals, including lying about their age, sexual orientation, marital status, or occupation; disappearing without explanation; switching love on and off; making promises that failed to materialize; being manipulative; focusing predominantly on sexual interactions; failing to acknowledge hurtful actions; isolating the respondent from other social support; and being evasive about their past.
Enjoying the creation of drama, taking credit for the work of others, and blaming others for wrongdoing was seen
This included blaming others for their own wrongdoing, taking credit for the work of others, manipulating others in the organization, causing turmoil among co-workers, causing co-workers to be reprimanded or terminated, bullying others, or engaging in sexual harassment in the workplace
Most victims of these types later developed anxiety or depression, if not PTSD. Stealing their money in clandestine ways was a constant.

1. For instance, respondents reported experiencing significant psychopathology due to their involvement with the individual, as 88% reported having become anxious or depressed, and 70% reported suffering from PTSD. They also reported losses in numerous material domains, including financial, as 68% of respondents reported that they had lost money as a result of their involvement with the individual. Of these respondents, 27% lost $5,000 USD or less, 14% lost $5,000 to $10,000, 20% lost $10,000 to $50,000, 13% lost $50,000 to $100,000, 18% $100,000 to $500,000, and a further 9% lost more than $500,000, per their reports.

It didn’t get better, but got worse, with age
. Of these respondents, less than 1% reported that the index individuals engaged in much less manipulation, deceit, and antisocial behavior; 5% reported they engaged in somewhat less of this behavior; 36% reported that they engaged in these behaviors to the same extent; and 57% of respondents reported that the index individual became worse after age 50. Thus, a total of 93% of respondents reported that the index individual’s behavior was just as bad or worse after age 50.
Openly being cruel was witnessed, leading to more and more prosocial repulsion. Constantly looking for the next person to con was witnessed.
. As he aged, he seemed to care less about hiding his behavior, and he seemed to openly enjoy being cruel. The 'fix' he got from being abusive became more important to him than the 'cover-up.'" Another respondent wrote about her mother, "Nothing ever changed. She exploits, lies, throws tantrums, rages, abandons, pouts, defames, threatens, and would still be physically violent if she had the physical strength." Another respondent wrote about her former romantic partner, "He's constantly looking out for the next person to con. It is his life.”
Increased cruelty and increased volatility were seen over the years, not less
. As shown in Table 6, 21% of respondents said they saw a total personality change—"the mask came off." Respondents also spontaneously mentioned behaviors that associated with ASPD, such as a lack of empathy, an increase in callous-type behaviors (e.g. abuse or cruelty), as well as an increase in lies and manipulation. Only 1% indicated that the relationship became less volatile.

Long winded, apologies:
I financed a 2019 VW GTI, and it was totaled 8hrs later in a house fire. (Family friends house, everyone’s fine, no one’s at fault, FD determined old wiring sparked the insulation, report specifically says not arson/not intentional) they also lost a vehicle, which their claim was settled in two and a half weeks after the incident and they’ve already purchased their replacement vehicle.
A month later (today) my insurance gave me an answer to settle the claim, the payout number actually exceeds my personal estimate. So good, but some of the information is wrong on the claim settlement. The paperwork I submitted shows I bought the car at 38,581 miles + 20 miles to get home where it remained parked until burned. The insurance paperwork shows 40,268 miles. No way I drove 1,777 miles in 8 hours. They also are claiming the 1200k exhaust is only worth $130, and they are not counting the other 6k in aftermarket parts that I purchased the vehicle with (all documented with receipts), and claiming that they are all factory parts included with my trim level.
Here’s the thing, I feel like I did most of all of the leg work for them….I submitted all the purchase paperwork, all the dmv paperwork, all the banks paperwork, had the dealership confirm all the aftermarket parts to the insurance agent even after I uploaded every receipt. They told me they couldn’t get a copy of the fire report, I had it for them in five minutes after a phone call to the investigator that responded. Anything I could think of between documents and photos was uploaded to the claim via the app and they still got so much information wrong. Am I overthinking or do I need to fight this harder. The pay out is more than I thought, but with the mileage on the claim settlement not matching the numbers on the vehicle, and then saying the aftermarket parts are factory trim doesn’t sit right. Not to mention in the email from the agent when sending the claim, she said here is the information for the “theft” of your vehicle when it’s clearly a fire claim.
TLDR: Insurance claim mileage numbers don’t match the actual vehicle by 1,777 and they are claiming aftermarket parts (with submitted receipts from the dealer) are factory trim. The pay out is much larger than anticipated regardless, do I accept this amount so we can close the claim/move on or bring this to their attention?
Edit: Not trying to come off as complaining. I’m happy with the number, it covers the vehicle loss and the difference of the parts already. More so curious into the “why/how” on the agencies end. Thank you.

I just got off a cruise today and noticed I had two pending charges from NCL Jade from yesterday totaling $98. It’s really odd because we went by guest services yesterday during the day and saw our total onboard charges were just taxes for the drinks we ordered while in port on the first day.
Not sure if this is normal or not, but it seems rather odd.
The most frustrating part is that NCL offers no option to contact them over the phone regarding charges like this. You can only submit an online form, and they claim it can take 15 days to get back to us.

I'm on this sub for military-specific information and support for SOs, but every single day there are just updates with general relationship stuff that really doesn't relate to the military/being a military SO specifically.
Maybe I'm wrong on this, but your partner, spouse or sneaky link just being in the military does -not- automatically make your question relevant to this sub. Unless your situation is specifically affected by your SO's service beyond it just being long distance, or you need help or information related to processes etc that involve the military, I don't feel like it should be posted here.
For general relationship advice, there's relationships and other such subreddits. There are so many posts that are just general relationship or long-distance relationship related things with basically 'oh btw they're in the military' thrown in to make it somehow relevant to this sub.
Eg "They keep ignoring my texts but are online, do they still love me?" → how is this related to the military? Unless your question is whether they have security limitations stopping them from replying despite being online, this is a general relationship issue that is irrelevant to the military.
or "They cheated, do I stay with them?" → unless you are asking about things related to military divorce processes, military child support payment obligations, COC reporting, military support for families..... how does them being in the military matter?
Maybe it's just me, but while I understand that people are going through rough times and need support, this sub is for the military SO-related stuff, not just 'I'm a military SO, so everything I write, even if off-topic, is automatically relevant here' stuff.

On March 4, 2024 my son Prince Solomon was born which I have tested positive for methamphetamines which I didn't know I was helping my friend clean up her house so CPS was involved investigating because I came up positive while having my baby The hospital mandator reporter called CPS told them that I came back positive for a methamphetamines which my baby was not born with the drugs and his system due to that situation they had my case open for 45 days to rule if there was gonna keep the case open or close it within the next 20 days of the investigation my case manager never told me that I tested positive six times for fentanyl I never done fentanyl a day in my life I asked my CPS worker can I get a copy of my test result records she told me that she has to contact her supervisor and see what she says then the next phone call I get that there was closing out my case that there was no longer a prop of a cause to keep my case open that my kids was taking care of that was no abuse or neglect in my home of my children my case was closed April 25, 2024 due to this allegedly case right here that the reason why now my children has been taken out of my custody into protective service of children services I was asleep the undercover cops came into my apartment they never knocked they never announced they stuff my baby boy that's two months old was in the room with me asleep my son Khyree was at Nanas Which ever pertain at this time they arrested my roommates boyfriend which they was legally investigating him the apartment is not in his name nor my name is his wife name They never presented a search warrant to enter the home they lied on the report saying that they knocked for several hours indicating have to use force entry to get into the door which I'm not understanding because my door is still intact and I have a two month old baby which all that noise would've woke him up especially me too due to the way the police woke me up with guns in my face in the office say my name Bella a couple of times until the point I woke up to realize the office had guns in my face which they told me to take the covers off me slowly as which I done they handcuffed me as my but I was unzipping the first thing that came into my mind was my baby boy Khyree there was my son Khyree was in I told him if he's not up here that he must be at the Nanas so the police went downstairs to the Nanas and went got my son Khyree the other office to grab My Son's playpen and told My Son you're going to Kitty jail now at that time there let me go back into the house grab some clothes for my kids feed him and everything else let me go back downstairs and bring My Son back to the Nanas Nana came back upstairs and grab my son Prince Solomon due to The situation of that time CPS showed up I was talking to the investigator and the CPS worker walked up we barely said a few words To the both of us and she walked away which means Me in the officer thought she left The office she told me if I would help him that he will make sure CPS won't take my kids pretend that the police already finished their investigation they left the paper that says on that paperwork it said they took these items.
One. narcotics 2. indicative ownership 3. Firearm 4. Ammunition 5. Phone 6. Paraphernalia 7 Male /clothing
After the officer was done searching I went back downstairs to where my kids was at the babysitter I got a call from the detective asking me where I was at I told him where I was and when I open the door it was four black-and-white officers and two CPS worker and also the detective which he was blocking the door I was crying hysterically telling him why are you taking my children for they indicated that I told them that I didn't know where the whereabouts of my son Khyree let alone that the officer had to knock for several hours to wake me That was a report on top of it they're saying that they found baggies like type with the indicate of crystal met subject inside her purse next to his ID which I never had drugs in anywhere my children can touch it or what I'm not understanding if you feel like that I am on drugs or indicating on drugs then you should've never close my case out Reason because they took my kids is indicating that Miss Wilson is neglecting her children due to her substance abuse Miss Wilson have left her son Prince Solomon alone for several hours wow she indicated that I told her that I didn't know where my kids were let alone Khyree they snatch my kids out of my arms I was crying hysterically I asked I wanted to CP workers do you have any children she told me no I told her how can you tell me I'm child neglecting my baby and all I did was get some sleep and he was in the other room so obviously everybody across the world they leave their children in the room as they go to sleep at night that means they're all neglected

YY reported a total revenue of $564.6 million for Q1 2024, surpassing the average analyst estimate of $552.67 million, with a net income of $45.3 million.
Segment Performance

• BIGO (revenue - $505.2M, profit - $61.0M, growth - 8.0%) - BIGO's revenue increased by 8.0% year-over-year, driven by a steady 6.9% increase in paying users.
• Likee Likee's revenue continued to recover year over year and it maintained its profitability.
• Hago Hago sustained positive operating cash flow during the first quarter.

Business Highlights

• BIGO Live's revenue continued its year-over-year rebound, with revenue from developed countries growing by 14.8%.
• BIGO Live remained focused on its user acquisition strategy, channeling more resources into developed countries and regions to enhance monetization efficiency, resulting in an 8.9% year-over-year MAU growth in these countries and regions.
• BIGO Live continued to grow its content and optimize services for creators.
• Likee's recent launch of interactive gaming features has been instrumental in breaking the ice and fostering connections between users, leading to substantial growth in paying users.
• Hago's implementation of more gamified interactions and paid features has effectively boosted user engagement and monetization.

Guidance
Expectations: BEAT
YY's reported revenue of $564.6 million exceeded the analysts' average estimate of $552.67 million for Q1 2024. The net income of $45.3 million also indicates a positive performance, although specific EPS data is missing to compare against the average EPS estimate of $0.81. The revenue growth in the BIGO segment by 8.0% year-over-year and the strategic focus on developed markets contributed to this outperformance.

A bit of a long story but I just hope I can get any actual advice as it just seems like I've been going in circles at this point with nothing I can do except constantly lose money. All of this has/is happening in England.
The starting point is that in early April, my phone was robbed off me. I immediately reported this to the police, cancelled any associations with my bank with the phone, all the usual procedures. Most importantly, I informed my mobile network provider (Three) to disable my SIM immediately, to which they confirmed this. Around 2 weeks later I was able to get a new phone and a replacement SIM.
On 15/05 my bank account was charged ten times the amount of my normal phone bill. I checked my phone bill for the period 26/03 - 25/04 and found extra charges of £139.98 due to "TikTok coins" purchases via Google, through ThreePay method using my phone number. These occurred on 8/04 and 17/04. I never used "TikTok" before and do not even use Google playstore for apps as I use an iPhone. I raised this issue with Three to dispute the charges and ask for a refund, as well as a stop to any future 3rd party charges through ThreePay as I never opted into this. I was told by in-store staff that they are unable to do anything as it is a 3rd party charge, and that I had to go to the complaints team as well as contacting Google/TikTok myself. I contacted TikTok and Google but have not received any reply. The Three complaints service told me that they are unable to cancel ThreePay, and told me to contact Google. I stated clearly that I have never used Googleplay and would not use it in the future as I use an iPhone. I told the staff to note this down and confirmed they did so. My account was flagged for investigation and was told to wait for further updates while Three tried contacting Google. I was also told that any further 3rd party purchases would be flagged by Three and would not be authorised as this has happened to a previous customer before.
On 18/05, I was told by in-store staff that my old SIM should have stopped completely once a new card is/was activated, and in any case the old SIM should have stopped once disabled (soon after my phone was stolen).
On 20/05 I saw text messages from Googleplay confirming more TikTok coins purchased in real-time. I then immediately contacted the Three complaints team to which they confirmed that a further £92 was added to my phone bill for the next period (26/04 - 25/05), but I myself could not see this on my account. I asked for any evidence or documents confirming such charges but they claimed they were unable/refused to provide me with anything. They again referred me to Google and gave me an email address but my message was received with an error and unable to go through. Three claimed that Google had asked them to inform me to contact them, but have refused to give me written proof of this. On 27/05 I was called by Three who told me to cancel the payments from my Google account and to contact Google. I repeated the information that should have been noted down - that I do not even use Googleplay. I reconfirmed that this was noted down and was told to wait another 21 days for the investigation. On 28/05 more TikTok charges (£30.96) were added which I apparently cannot do anything about while Three continues to delay investigations.
I reported this to action fraud, and more recently to PSAuthority. But in the meantime, I do not want to continue to be charged by someone who is using my phone number for random purchases as I am a student and cannot afford to lose this much money. Is there really nothing that can be done to stop further 3rd party charges through ThreePay? I find this very hard to believe as the security levels are so low, otherwise it really seems like Three are in cahoots with these scammers. I would also appreciate any advice on who else to complain and raise this issue to and/or what I can even do in this situation.

TLDR: Doran has a different father to Elia and Oberyn. Both fathers were Free City nobles. Doran's father died in the 251 RHPR. Elia and Oberyn's father died in the 260 WOTNK. This would explain why no one has mentioned them yet and the Martell's interest in the Free Cities.
Quick Note: My headcanon name for their mother is Neria. Just saves me typing "Doran's predecessor", "Oberyn's mother", "former princess of Dorne", etc.
The strongest and most sensible assumptions I've made about this subject are:

1. The fathes died before 273, the year Tyrion was born, during which Oberyn went on his betrothal journey with "my mother, her consort, and my sister Elia" (ASOS Tyrion V). It makes no sense for Oberyn to refer to his own father or Elia's as a consort.
2. Doran and Oberyn never mentioning their fathes points to a lack of sentiment in regards to them, which in turn points to them dying before the brothers were old enough to remember them much, and given their ~10-year age gap, they must've had different fathers for this to be true. Conversely, Elia and Oberyn have about a year between them, so they likely shared a father.
3. Both fathers were openly married to Neria, since there is no in-text speculation about the three siblings' legitimacy or paternity, and the likes of Joanna and Aerys II would never have considered marrying their heirs to anyone of questionable birth. You can't be pulling the Mormont "my children were fathered by bears lol" schtick when you're trying to betroth your daughter to the crown prince.
4. Both fathers were from prestigious enough backgrounds to marry the heiruler of Dorne but on individual levels were so unremarkable that even their own sons don't namedrop them from time to time.
5. Excluding the Martells, all the great houses and Dornish houses can be ruled out. Quentyn, Arianne and the Sand Snakes never mention any living cousins besides each other, and if either of their paternal grandfathers had been a non-Martell Dornish nobleman, Arianne would've mentioned his house when thinking of who she could trust to help her while imprisoned. I think it's also safe to write off the houses Elia and Oberyn visited on their betrothal voyage (Daynes, Redwynes, Hightowers, Chesters, Grimms, Hewetts, Serrys and Crakehalls).

With all that in mind, let's move onto some candidates:

Martell Man/Men

Consanguinity is common enough in Westeros: Tywin and Joanna were first cousins, and Cregan, Edric, and Rickard Stark show it's not taboo in the North, so unless the Rhoynar had an aversion to it that was carried pver into Dornish culture, there's no reason to think the Martells would be against it.
From the reign of Daeron II to that of Aerys II (i.e. 99 years), the Martells had close ties to the Targaryens. Though the deaths of Baelor Breakspear and his children put an end to the main Targ line having Martell ancestry, the "several heirs" (TWOIAF - The Targaryen Kings: Daeron II) Daenerys had borne for Maron were half-Targ. Though highly unlikely that they began to practice sibling incest, it's likely that in order to keep their Targ blood (and in turn the possibility of marrying back into the royal line) strong, some of Daenerys' grandchildren and great-grandchildren were married to each other. Neria might have been subject to this tradition, and therefore either her first husband, second husband or both could have been a descendant of Daenerys. This would help explain why the current Martells seem to be so small in number, as well as why Elia was chosen to be Rhaegar's wife over every other noble lady with Targ ancestry (really hard to imagine that all descendants of Saera, Baela, Rhaena, Elaena, Daella and Rhae at the time were either male, married, menopausal or less Targy).
However, Doran and his children point to this not being the case. If this tradition existed, then why was Doran not subject to it? If second-degree incest (is that what you're supposed to call it? I don't know, you get what I mean) was the Martell deal now, then why did Arianne feel so "uneasy" and ashamed when internally recalling her childhood crush on her uncle (AFFC The Queenmaker)? Furthermore, if Quentyn was the product of such intentional inbreeding, not only would it have been really stupid for him to not tell Dany this, he likely wouldn't have been burnt. If my calculations about Ben Plumm are correct, then he could be as little as 1/16th Targ, which is evidently enough dragonlord ancestry for dragons to take to a person (ASOS Danerys V). Rhaegal did not take to Quentyn, which means he must have less Targ ancestry than Ben (or perhaps there's a big difference between a dragon being cool with sitting on your shoulder and a dragon being cool with you screaming at it while cracking a whip). This is also why I don't believe that Doran is Aerys' bastard (along with there only being a four-year age gap between them), but what of Elia and Oberyn?

Aerys II

I don't think Elia and/or Oberyn are Aerys' bastards, though I understand why some might come to that conclusion. "Joanna Lannister was not the first lady to be dismissed abruptly from Her Grace's service, nor was she the last" (TWOIAF - The Targaryen Kings: Aerys II), Neria was one of Rhaella's ladies, and it would explain why Elia, out of all the noble women in Westeros and the Free Cities, was chosen to be Rhaegar's wife. However, Aerys would've had to have been 12-14 when they were conceived, it is unlikely he was interested in a woman old enough to be his mother when he was known to be "exceedingly fond of young women", and given that Aerys lost interest in his lovers quickly and both he and Neria seemed to have fertility issues, it's very improbable that they produced a child together, let alone two. The risk of trying to pass off your unborn child as legitimate only to be forced to admit you had a fling with the teenage crown prince after it pops out Valyrian would be such an insane one to take even once, and it's hard to imagine the mother and mentor of Doran doing such a thing.

Brynden Tully

This theory was mostly just me slamming two big questions together - who was Neria's husband/s and why did Brynden never marry - in hopes of forming an answer to both. For a short time I was gripped by the idea that Elia and Oberyn's father was a veteran of the War of the Ninepenny Kings and IIRC my thought process went something like this:
"Didn't the Blackfish fight during the WOTNK? GASP That's why he never married: he was already married to Neria! That's why he left Riverrun: he felt guilty for fighting for the side that ended up killing his daughter! That's (partially) why Doran refused Hoster's invitation for Arianne to visit Riverrun! Black fish, red viper, "colour" "animal" moniker, THIS MAKES TOTAL SENSE!"
As much as I'd love it to be true because the idea of Catelyn and Oberyn being first cousins is hilarious to me, it can't be. Among many other reasons, we only know him to be near Dorne in 260, 3-4 years after Elia and Oberyn were born. Now I think their father did not survive the war, just as Doran's father was killed in the 251 rebellion of the Rat, the Hawk, and the Pig, which took place when he was around three. Their fathers dying while they were still toddlers would explain why they haven't been mentioned yet.

Free City Noblemen

I think this is the strongest theory. It explains why we haven't heard anything about them; Westerosi nobles don't seem to care much about Free City politics, and the few examples of FC nobles marrying into Westerosi houses don't seem to elicit much intrigue outside of xenophobic villainisation and scapegoating (Larra Rogare and Serala of Myr come to mind).
It is possible that Aliandra Martell's marriage to Drazenko Rogare started a trend of Dornish nobles marrying and/or making paramours of FC people, particularly those of Lys. I believe Ellaria Sand's mother is Lyseni, since she is described as "exotic" (which is never used to describe the Dornish), worships a Lysene goddess and the names of her two youngest daughters, Dorea and Loreza, sound Lyseni (Dorea is one letter off of Doreah, the name of Dany's Lysene handmaid).
I don't think either Doran's or Elia and Oberyn's father were Lyseni, though it is one of the better options. The Free Cities I've written off as options are:

1. Lorath. It's too insignificant to marry into, not to mention far away.
   
2. Norvos. Would've been mentioned by now since Doran married a Norvoshi noble. Also Norvos is probably the poorest Free City after Lorath, so not a great match for a Dornish princess.
   
3. Tyrosh. Could've easily been mentioned when Doran told Arianne about his plan to send her to the Archon of Tyrosh. Also it was the Blackfyre stronghold, so unlikely to be an attractive option to the Martells.
   

That leaves Braavos, Pentos, Qohor, Myr, Lys and Volantis. Myr was close to being the fourth written-off city because having ties to Myr after the Defiance of Duskendale would've likely put the Martells in grave danger of Aerys' paranoia. On top of that, along with Tyrosh and Lys, Myr is a historic rival of Dorne's for dominion over the Stepstones. However, Taena of Myr looks a lot like Arianne, and she could be one of Dorne's "friends at court" (ADWD The Watcher). Perhaps she is a cousin?
Out of the six, my preference is that Doran's father was Qohorik while Elia and Oberyn's father was Volantene.
Qohor is one of the most fascinating Free Cities and yet we know so little about it. We don't even know what type of government they have. It would fit Doran's character to partially hail from such a secretive city.
Elia and Oberyn's father being a Volantene noble would explain why Elia was chosen over every other highborn girl in Westeros and the Free Cities to be Rhaegar's wife (maybe they descend from Saera's son by a Triarch?), as well as how Oberyn got behind the Black Walls so quickly and got away with fathering a bastard by a woman "of the noblest blood of Old Volantis". One might wonder why no one has mentioned this, especially since their nephew Quentyn was in Volantis, but technically he's not related to Elia and Oberyn's father any more than he is Nym's mother, and if Oberyn left Volantis on bad terms, it'd probably have been best for Quentyn to not use his connection to him as leverage.
Together with Doran's marriage to Mellario, that would give the Martells connections to Norvos, Qohor and Volantis, the three Free Cities that are located along the Rhoyne, their ancestral home. Funny, that.

Unfortunately it seems likely that the non-Muslims who comment on the Gaza war don't understand Islam, and that the Muslim commentators don't admit that they have a bias, meanwhile Islam in fact plays a role in the Gaza war. A relevant summary:
Muhammad started his own religion when he was forty and immediately came into conflict with the other religious people of his community, mostly polytheists and Jews. Muhammad became a war general and spent the next ten years of his life trying to kill off the other religions around him. He succeeded.
During this time, every day he in essence gave war pep-talks to his troops. As most of their fighting was against Jews, most of the war pep-talks were against Jews. His followers wrote down everything he said every day, mostly in the form of scraps of paper containing short segments. When he died, his followers swept these scraps of paper together to make first the Quran, then the Hadith, as there were thousands of these scraps of paper.
The entirety of the Islamic literature reads, therefore, like a slow, hypnotic rant against Jews, and also against Christians, against polytheists, against other now obscure and defeated religions, and against all non-Muslim "disbelievers" in general.
Mostly though, it focuses on Jews. The first two main chapters of the Quran in fact are about Jews: chapter 2 "The Cow", criticizing the Jews for once worshipping a golden calf, and chapter 3 "The Family of Imran (Moses)", meaning all of the Jews. There's not much difference between any of the Quran or Hadith chapters though; they all continue along mostly in the same way as the first two and are titled variously by the scant amounts of other concepts sometimes explored in the chapters. Mostly it's all a slow, hypnotic rant against all Jews and other non-believers.
If you don't believe any of this, check it for a first time. You'll be shocked. Islam is an inherently discriminatory religion toward Jews, and that's really the basis of the aggression that comes out of Gaza and other places toward them.
Most revelatory of all in this regard is the fact (if you check your history books) that the Ottoman Empire participated in attacking Britain and the allies in World War 1, and Britain won over them, obtaining what is today the Gaza, Israel, and West Bank areas. There was never any Jewish theft. Britain wanted to let the Jews move into that land afterward, and it was their choice to do so, as it was the Brits' land.
The Jews were met with immediate violence from the Muslims, whose religion tells them to attack Jews. It got worse. Sick of the violence, the Jews declared independence for their territory and formed a state. This was fair and appropriate. Immediately, large groups of Muslims combined armies to try to massacre the Jews. They were repelled.
It never stopped. The Muslims tried to combine armies and massacre the Jews again, in '67. They were repelled that time too.
Then in 2007 Gaza started the Gaza War against the Jews, and have fought it every day since, including today. They've been rocketing Israel constantly since 2007; October 7th was just a sort of culmination.
By the way, declaring independence and forming a state was the pattern set for and by every other territorial area that was formed out of the Ottoman Empire- resulting in every Middle Eastern state you see today- Israel did nothing different, and did not need a reason to do it- Gaza and the West Bank have always had the same ability, but have torn themselves apart fighting each other instead, while the world continues to wait on them. Also, they need to not form a government that declares war against Israel as part of its foundation. That’s the other reason they haven’t formed any real states yet. No one would stop them from doing so if they did it without any war declarations. The concept that anyone else in the world would somehow be able to give them a state is bogus.
The real problem will be solved when the world has a conversation with Islam, telling them to give up the part about cursing non-believers: approximately half the content of the Islamic religion. Then the Gazans can live non-aggressively with Jews next to them. So as well with the West Bank, Jordan/Iraq/Syria/Libya/Yemen/Iran, the twenty-or-so other nations that don't accept Israeli passports, etcetera.
Before any moderators, members of this site, or non-members of this site, try to get me banned or give me -100 karma points, insisting that I’m biased or that I’ve made this up: I challenge you to read or watch any summary of the life of Muhammad and the first ten years of Islam, then to read the first hundred pages of any English translation of the Quran, then to read the sub-chapter “Fighting Jews” of the chapter “Jihad” of the Al-Bukhari hadith book, then to read Gaza’s government charter “The Hamas Covenant”. If you put in a few minutes a day it’ll take you about two weeks. Don’t complain about me asking you to do this much research; it’s not much and it’s a bare minimum I can think of for you to check my work. Then you’re going to ask the same question I asked, “Why haven’t I heard of this from anyone or any side reporting on the Gaza war?” I believe the answer is several-fold: one is that there is simply a shocking lack of bothering to do much research by even those most vocal about the conflict. Two is that those who know about this know that no outsider asked for support of Gaza would sympathize with them if they knew about this. Three is that this stuff is outrageous, and no one wants to be the deliverer of that outrage, or get accused themselves of making this up. Four (and you’ll have to read to understand this) is that the believers are told in general to not trust disbelievers, which would include not telling them the truth. If you believed someone else was going to Hell, but that they didn’t know about it, would you tell them? They’re not gonna like hearing it; why tell them? Count the number of times Muhammad says all Jews and disbelievers are going to Hell in the Quran. You’ll lose count by about page 25 and it just keeps going like that.
All the resources mentioned are easily available online for free in pdf form or otherwise; just do a search for each, and youtube has lots of good videos on Muhammad’s life. I also highly recommend you watch overhead-battle-analysis-style videos (like Kings & Generals channel & similar) to review every single early battle of Islam, in order. You may also want to watch some on the first few battles of Abu Bakr also, the guy who picked up Muhammad’s war banner after him and carried on the violent conquest of the entire Arabian Peninsula, eradicating one by one what used to be a diverse array of now-extinct local religions. You could check out a copy of the Quran translated or order one, which I also recommend. I have Pickthall’s translation as a hard copy and I recommend it; I also used three different online Qurans and three different online Al-Bukhari hadiths (I wanted to make sure I wasn’t making any mistake by reading some bad translation; turned out nope they all read like that).
And before anyone says, well, that kind of stuff is said in the Bible too… First of all, find it; second of all, if it says that kind of stuff even a handful of times in the Bible, that’s different from Islam’s thousand times saying it, over and over again- it’s really a different sort of book.
I want to say last that the Muslims aren’t “like this”; rather, they’re told to be like this, by a high-pressure, demanding religion. They’re also told I’m sure, as for Gaza, by their friends, parents, neighbors, grandparents, local TV stations, and government, what is truly an altered version of history, wherein the Jews “stole” Palestine. They’re taught to distrust anything that the West says against that, because they’re taught to distrust disbelievers- of course the disbelievers would lie about this stuff- “hasbara”. The Jews “stole” Palestine, so, they’re “occupiers”. They don’t want to sound racist because they know discrimination is not tolerated in the disbelievers’ world, so they say “Zionists”, in place of “Jews”. Underneath it, they’re not saying much to the outside world- just enough and in just the right ways to sound presumably appropriate and reasonable, legitimate. It’s like a big game to try to get what they want (Jews expelled or killed), or, as discussed above, it's that they unfortunately don't know any better cause they've been lied to themselves. To the extent that anyone knows this stuff though and hasn't mentioned it, I would feel that we’ve been lied to and played for fools, and it makes me want to say screw the Squad, Sanders, and the campus protests... all right here on American soil!!!! I trust the vast majority of Muslims are not like this. I think they are too afraid though to voice any opposition to any of the Muslims who are hardcore about this stuff, of which Gaza and the West Bank have become the best examples- I told you to read the Hamas Covenant so I’ll trust you’ll do it; meanwhile I’ll add that the guy who ran the West Bank, Abbas, wrote his own dissertation as a youth on his conspiracy theory that the Jews “did the Holocaust to themselves, to create false international sympathy and a pretext for stealing Israel”, and he has continued to educate the West Bank’s people with this line of reasoning, making “Nakba day” into a sort of mockery of anyone else’s Holocaust remembrances. Meanwhile Iran continues determined to one day lead the eradication.
If you care about caring, do the right thing- help educate others on what’s really going on in Gaza. It’s bigger than the past few months, it’s bigger than October 7^th, it’s even bigger than tens of thousands of casualties, and if we don’t do the right thing (demand and converse about how disbelievers have rights too), one day far in the future that total may be millions or billions. The time is now to resolve this between all of us, with words. Learn about and then be vocal about the unfairness of Islam. Demand rights. Have conversations.
To add to this goal, I offer the following:
I make this contract with Islam, whether they agree or not:
Disbelievers’ Bill of Rights:

1. The disbelievers have rights too.
2. The disbelievers have wonderful and diverse cultures of their own, that are not to be eradicated; Earth is good when its cultures are diverse and not homogenized.
3. The disbelievers are not going to Hell for disbelieving Islam.
4. The believers are not going to Paradise for eradicating the disbelievers.
5. There will be no “final day” where all the Jews are killed.
6. Jesus will not show up on the final day to personally kill all the Jews (Islamic eschatology).
7. Disbelievers have the right to not be discriminated against or degraded by the believers. Any disbelievers neighboring believers are not to have rocks thrown at them, suicide attacks launched at them, rockets launched at them, rifles or pistols fired at them, etcetera.
8. Disbelievers have the right to not tolerate any literature that discriminates against them or is derogatory or degrading toward them, or that advocates any sort of violence against them, or that proscribes any mistreatment of them.

Furthermore, I liberate all Muslims, with the following lines:
You don’t have to surrender to Islam, completely, if any of it seems wrong to you. For that matter, you can pick any religion, you can pick no religion, you can make up your own religion, you can institute your own renewal of Islam and start a new chapter on it; you can do anything you want on this planet, and no lightning bolt will strike you from anyone’s god. If the afterlife is real, then you’re going to it whether you believe in it or whether you disbelieve in it. If there’s Heaven and Hell, you’re going to Heaven for being a good person, Hell for being a bad person.
Also, Muhammad may have said that his teachings were “a Book”. However, Muhammad did not give any specifics instructions to make any book exactly in the fashion in which the Quran and Hadith and others (Kitube of Shia, Wahhabiism’s books, Salafist works etcetera) were made, and, I believe that Muhammad would have seen the error in making them in those exact ways- this would cause problems later- the format is too heavy on the disbelievers- it will someday make for a problematic relationship between different faiths- you should feel free to rearrange any and all verses, excluding as many as you like, reinterpreting any you like, to make any new Book that makes more sense for use as an every-day, all-time religious book: one that focuses on “the good stuff” and not the bad. Muhammad needed to rally an army every day. We don’t need that in our daily lives now that we’re all trying to put war away. This is the 21^st century. Nine nations use nukes, and two of them are Muslim (Pakistan, Kazakhstan). We need to right now make decisions that will put away all war inclinations between us forever. If you don’t like my way of doing it, come up with something better and suggest it. I say we can do it by having a conversation where disbelievers stick up for themselves and believers listen.
And, I suggest this interpretation: perhaps Allah wanted to include a sort of test, within Islam, to separate hypocrites from believers- Allah included a bunch of stuff telling you that disbelievers are bad and to attack them. Maybe it’s to see who rejects that, to send them to Paradise, and to see who decides to act on it, to send them to Hell.
There is plenty of evidence that this is true in Gaza right now. Why would Allah punish them unless they were bad? They have relentlessly attacked Israel for years. Maybe this is Allah’s punishment.
Also, you are free to associate with disbelievers, at any time and place, whatever they’re saying at the time. You can date and intermarry with disbelievers if you like. Try not calling them disbelievers and you’ll have luck.
I also state that I am a learned scholar (college degree earned, floor-to-ceiling stacks of nonfiction books read, research published) and I am authorized to make fatwa (judgments) and to issue tafsir (commentary/interpretations on holy works).
As a warning to angry-comment-posters: you may find that I can back up with references and examples every point I’ve made! Watch out!
That being said, am I wrong about anything? Please tell me if I have anything wrong; I can only do so much research and then sweep it all together off the top of my head. Let me know. I’ll apologize if I get something wrong and perhaps adjust my thesis.

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It happened. He didn't deny that. Not like he was a suspect or anything—not yet—but he never denied it to himself. At the same time, this all happened over a decade ago—twelve years to be exact.
He didn't think of it every day; in fact, sometimes an entire month would go by where it barely crossed his mind.
In a way, that whole experience—he thought of all the abductions and murders as a singular event—now felt as if it belonged to somebody else.
It was a time in his life when he was confused, mixed-up, searching; a dark time, you know, like a phase. Who didn't have one of those in their past?
Plus, he was married now. His wife, Dee, obviously didn't know about it and he felt no obligation to tell her. Did he ask about her former lovers?
Sometimes there are things in the past and you just let them be. Whether it was Dee losing her virginity to the quarterback of the football team in the backseat at a drive-in or him using multiple black garbage bags and masking tape on that thing he didn't have time to bury in rural Tennessee, everyone has things they would rather forget about. Sometimes you just leave things where they lie.
So that's what Ned Doyle did.
Until that Sunday morning, November 6th, 1988.
He was a having a glass of Dee's pulpy homemade orange juice, waiting for his coffee to percolate, when he opened his heavy weekend edition of the New York Times (probably Ned's greatest extravagance—he liked its heft; and how the Arts & Leisure section made him feel culturally superior to his Ohio townsfolk, “the Philistines of Findlay,” he called them) when he saw the article buried in the back.
The country was two days from heading to the polls for the General Election—Bush v. Dukakis—so most everything else that week had been relegated to the back.
He read the article twice before he could even begin to make sense of it. It seemed to be a story about something called "DNA fingerprinting" and a 27-year-old baker in Great Britain named Colin Pitchfork who had confessed to raping and murdering two 15-year-old girls, in separate incidents a few years apart, after a new scientific process had been used to extract information from semen which he, Colin Pitchfork, had left at the crime scenes (likely inside the victims) some five years earlier.
Now if they could do all that after five years, why not ten years—or maybe even… twelve?
"Interesting story here," he said to Dee. It wasn't uncommon for Ned to read a news story twice—once for himself and a second time aloud to Dee while she brewed his coffee and burnt her toast. But this was his third reading and Ned acted as if it were his first.
"What do you make of that?" he asked. It somehow got worse each time he read it. After the third time, he felt as if he had been sucker punched in the stomach.
"Science Fiction is what it sounds like," Dee said matter-of-factly, pouring Ned his coffee in a mug that bore the Marathon Oil insignia. Findlay, Ohio was Marathon’s headquarters although there had been rumors circulating about a move to Texas.
"And unconstitutional," he said. "Cops running a dragnet like that, taking blood samples from 5,000 townspeople. Thankfully, that would never pass the muster here."
"They did catch the killer so maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea," she said, buttering her burnt toast. "Otherwise, who knows? They could have convicted the wrong man.”
Ned had already gotten lucky once – astonishingly so. Griffin Gerald Jones, the famed “I-75 Corridor Child Killer,” had claimed responsibility for all but one of Ned’s victims before dying in Florida’s electric chair.
"You can't have police in this country running around, sticking everyone with needles, drawing blood for some sort of science experiment,” he said. “Nevermind the Constitution, what about AIDS?”
“What about it?” she asked.
“There's been hundreds, thousands of cases now where people have been infected by giving blood,” he said. “That's a medical fact. Get accused of a crime and AIDS too?"
"It doesn't sound like any of the townspeople there in England got AIDS, darling. Unless there's more to the story, besides what you read to me."
He watched her spread orange marmalade over her burnt toast and take a bite. She had a dead tooth and he saw it every time she opened her mouth. He loved Dee but had never been sexually attracted to her. Not in the way he had been attracted to others.
"It really is just a matter of time before that stuff makes it over here," she said with her mouth full. "To this side of the pond, as they say." She took a sip of his orange juice. "Isn’t that how it always works? Things start over there in England, or in California, and then phht, before you know it, it makes its way to Findlay."
He held his hand over his stomach. She saw him wince.
"Was it my orange juice again? Was it still pulpy? I squeezed it by hand and even strained it twice this time."
"It’s not your fault,” he said. “I think it’s me. Orange juice is getting too… acidic for me." He looked at the clock on the coffee maker. "I'm going to be late."
He turned the page.
He played the 8 o'clock Mass by rote as he had many a bleary-eyed Sunday morning. It was pure muscle memory at this point. He made a few mistakes here and there, missed a key or two, but it was nothing the organ's sustain pedal couldn't mask – not that anyone would complain (not at the 8 o'clock anyway).
On Sundays Ned had four Masses: the 8, the 9:30, the big one at 11, and the 12:30 for the dilettantes who couldn't get their acts together for the 11.
He turned the page.
Today he was using Glory and Praise, AKA "the blue hymnal" for songs he knew by heart.
Turning the pages of his sheet music, reading each note, he was able to keep his mind off it.
Ned abhorred cliches (especially those involving sports) but he made an exception for “Out of sight, out of mind.” For Ned, that wasn’t a cliché; it was a way of life. He was a man who preferred to be heard, not seen, which made St. Bartholomew (or St. Bart’s) the perfect home for him.
In a spectacular architectural oversight, the church's pipe organ was situated so the organist's back was to the altar and pews. The organist of course needs to see what's going on in the Mass to read certain non-verbal cues but the arrangement suited Ned just fine. The congregation was comprised of many young families who had many young children—boys in particular—and it wasn't so much that he couldn't control himself because he was now firmly in control of all that; it was more that he didn't need any reminders of that time when he couldn't.
Especially during church.
So to see the altar behind him, Ned had installed an actual rearview mirror, the type you'd find on an old Buick, and he used a special type of putty to affix it to the mantle of the pipe organ. Having been the church organist at St. Bart's for nine years, he seldom needed it anymore—he could do it in his sleep—but it came in handy today as he found his attention drifting and he nearly missed the oratory refrain at the 9:30 Mass.
His real problems didn't start until the 35-minute break between the 8 and 9:30.
He was reorganizing his sheet music after the first wave of churchgoers had cleared out, when he began thinking about Colin Pitchfork again. The article said he was a baker in England somewhere—did it say he baked cakes or was that Ned's invention?
Even though no picture was provided in the Times article, Ned spent the balance of the 9:30 service picturing the 27- year-old ex-rapist/murderer working in his small English bakery, quietly going about his business, baking his cakes, when the police (Bobbies?) came.
Was he expecting them?
He played the offertory hymn, "On Eagle's Wings," as the ushers began taking up the collections and a family of parishioners he’d never seen before brought the gifts up.
And what was going through Pitchfork's head when he saw the Bobbies there? When they began asking him about rapes and murders that happened almost five years ago? The article said that he had initially given investigators someone else's blood when “the enquiry” began. Had he somehow caught wind of this “DNA Fingerprinting?”
There was a new usher, Ned noticed, in his makeshift rearview mirror.
The Times article said that one of Pitchfork's co-workers at the bakery had taken the blood test masquerading as Pitchfork because Pitchfork had told the co-worker that ‘he could not give blood under his own name because he had already given blood while pretending to be a friend of his who had wanted to avoid being harassed by police because of a youthful conviction for burglary.’ This story was later overheard by a woman in a pub who immediately went to the police.
Ned realized he had missed the homily twice now. Not that it mattered. Heard one you've heard them all and Ned was pretty sure there would be no surprises. Plus, he'd have two more chances to catch it. He knew he would have to really focus for the 11 o'clock. That was always the main event. He was going to play "I Will Raise Him Up," a complex hymn, which required his full attention. He would scratch that one now if he hadn’t read that article and if the Sunday programs hadn't already been printed. People liked that one –it was a real barn burner, as they say—and if he skipped it, there might be questions.
The last thing Ned needed right now were fucking questions.
Who was this new usher, by the way?

By the start of the 11 o'clock Mass, Ned wondered whether anyone would even show for the 12:30, seeing that it was already standing room only. The 11 was always the most popular Mass, but today felt different; it was packed like Christmas Eve. What was the occasion? Was the predominantly conservative town that afraid of Dukakis winning the presidency? Ohio was a swing state after all and that image of the little Greek man in the tank was unnerving, sure, but was it enough to warrant this sort of turnout for the 11 AM Mass at St. Bart's in Findlay?
Or was something else going on?
Ned didn’t believe they had come to hear his rendition of "I Will Raise Him Up."
Or could there be another reason? Maybe they had all read the same Times article. Maybe there had long been simmering suspicion of Ned in the community and maybe the article finally prompted the townspeople to join together and take arms. With pitchforks.
On March 31, 1892, the only known lynching in the history of Hancock County occurred when a mob of 1,000 men, many "respectable citizens," broke into the county jail in Findlay. They lynched Mr. Lytle, a man who had killed his wife and two daughters with a hatchet the day before. The townsfolk hanged the man twice (first from the bridge, then a telegraph pole) and then, in a classic case of overkill, shot his body over a dozen times. The authorities had intended to transfer the prisoner out of town at 1 o'clock in secret, where a train was scheduled to transport him to Lima, but someone talked.
Ned had only confessed what he had done to one person – a priest eight years prior. The priest was set to retire as he was dying of pancreatic cancer and visiting from a nearby parish. For years Ned had heard this priest was “of the old school” – i.e., your word to God’s ear, and it went no further. He was as safe as they come. Still, even then, Ned used the screened side of the Confessional, lowered his voice a full octave, and spoke of what he had done obliquely and in generalities. They were mortal sins. His penance severe: to repent and refrain from repeating the act again. The priest was now long dead. There’s no way he could have tracked Ned down and told anyone. Was there?
The last one was named Derek. That was the only one left unsolved.
He would play "I Will Raise Him Up" during Communion. Because of the crowds, he knew the communion lines would be longer and would thus require him to stretch the already difficult song a few minutes longer. If he was going to supply the masses, he was going to need a bigger yield. In a way it was like baking a cake, wasn't it?
He met Derek at a Dairy Queen in Paducah, Kentucky. It was Labor Day 1976. It must have been 100 degrees out, but it felt even hotter with the humidity. It was a real scorcher.
Derek had a bicycle with an American flag banana seat. It was the summer of Bicentennial Fever. The Dairy Queen was in an area known as Noble Park. It had a tin canopy that kept cars cool in the shade.
Ned missed a note as he turned the page. He stepped on the sustain pedal and his mistake sounded deliberate and beautiful even.
It was early evening; fireflies were out in full force and Ned was blotto. He had been drinking beer—cans of Schlitz—all day at the picnic of a friend (technically, the friend of an acquaintance so basically a stranger). A born introvert who still lived alone (this was pre-Dee), Ned was very drunk and primed for small talk. You must also remember this was a very different time. This was back when you still opened cans with an opener; drunk driving was frowned upon but not the cardinal sin it is today; and a grown man could still park outside a Dairy Queen and strike up an innocent conversation with a prepubescent boy on a bike.
"What da ya' got there?" Ned asked.
"Butterscotch Sundae," the boy said. The boy was blonde with brown eyes.
"Butterscotch, eh?"
The boy licked his plastic spoon and stared somewhere beyond the pea-green 1974 Buick Riviera Ned had inherited from his old man after he had kicked the bucket.
"For the life of me, I can't remember if I like butterscotch or not," Ned said. "That probably sounds pretty screwy, I bet."
"Get a free sample at the window,” the kid said. “They're free."
"Looks awfully busy over there. Mind if I have a taste of yours? I don't have any cooties, I promise."
The kid dragged his spoon over his ice cream as he mulled it over. Maybe seeing that he was almost done with it anyway, he figured what's the harm. He handed Ned the Styrofoam cup.
Ned looked at the boy as he stirred it a little and then placed the curved side of the spoon on his tongue and kept it there.
"I do like butterscotch," Ned said, giving it back. "Thank you for sharing that with me, that was awfully kind of you—say, what is your name?"
"Derek," the boy said.
"Derek. What a nice boy you are. Do you like dogs, Derek?"
"Sure," Derek said.
"Do you have a dog?"
"Not anymore. Used to. We had a beagle named Eleanor but she went blind and then lame and then..."
"What kind of dog was she?" Ned asked.
"A beagle," the boy said.
"A beagle, yes you said that. You like Golden Retrievers?"
"Sure," the boy said.
"Cause I have a Golden Retriever. It's a girl too. A bitch."
Derek smiled.
"She's pregnant. I mean she was. But… she just gave birth."
"To puppies?"
"You betcha. It was just a few weeks ago. She had a whole litter of 'em. Boys, girls. Cutest little pups you've ever seen. The thing is, Derek, I don't know what to do with them all. You're a nice boy. You just shared your Butterscotch Sundae with me and I'd care to return the favor. Would you… like a puppy?"
"How much?"
"For nothing,” Ned said. “For free.”
"You'll give me a puppy for nothing? And I can pick the one I want?"
"Sure can. They're at my place just down the road. Thing is, it's probably too far to bike there. And you're going to need both hands to hold on to the puppy. Hop in, I’ll give you a lift."
"What about my bike?"
"We could put it in the trunk but we're not going to be long. We'll be right back. It'll be safe here. People don't take things that aren’t theirs around here – especially when there's a lot of people around."
He remembered waking up on the floor of his apartment disoriented. He was late for work. He was still working as a salesman at the piano store. There was a big Labor Day sale still going on. Labor Day was always a big day for retail. The owner was a nice man and Ned wanted to call him and apologize but he wasn't sure what to say yet.
He hadn't planned on sleeping in. Forgetting work on Labor Day. The irony.
He saw the boy's underwear on his floor. They were tighty-whities from Fruit of the Loom. He thought of that every time he saw an ad for that company afterward.
They weren’t bloody but they were torn.
He remembered the sound of the filter on the aquarium he used to keep in his apartment. It was noisy but sometimes that was a good thing. He was very into Japanese Fighting Fish for a while until it became too expensive as they always killed each other.
There were no puppies obviously.
His apartment did not allow dogs.
His sense of disorientation and the ensuing panic prevented him from experiencing any of the usual remorse he felt afterward.
There would be plenty of time for that later.
The boy's body was in the bathroom just off the bedroom and he needed to get rid of it. He needed to get out of town. Out of Paducah. Out of Kentucky.
He placed the boy in a hardshell Samsonite suitcase, carried it out of his apartment, walked down the one flight of steps. He saw no one and he was confident no one had seen him. The suitcase was lighter than it should have been—a detail he never forgot—and he walked out to the carport where he saw his Riviera parked sloppily between the lines. He felt a wave of nausea come over him but he suppressed it. He opened his trunk, placed the suitcase in the back, and then looked around the apartment complex before walking back inside. He cleaned up with bleach. Showered. Hit the road.
There were no police gathered outside the Dairy Queen. It wasn’t a crime scene. He didn't look to see if the boy’s bike was still there; he didn’t want to appear suspicious.
He needed to get out of Paducah so he headed toward the freeway.
For a moment he briefly considered the Shawnee National Forest, which was to the north, but he stuck to his gut and took the newly-constructed Interstate 24 East toward Tennessee. Aside from getting out of Kentucky, he didn't have a plan. The asphalt was brand new and at times he felt as though he were floating across the highway. It took about two hours to get to the state line and once he was over, he filled up at a 76 Station in Clarksville, Tennessee. Only when he was filling his tank and had a moment to reflect, did he think about what was in the trunk. He imagined he had Superman's X-Ray vision and pictured the suitcase in the back, the boy's tiny body folded like a pretzel inside.
He missed both the readings, the Gospel, and the homily again. Then came the Consecration which was over before he knew it. It was time. He began to play "I Will Raise Him Up." In his rearview, he saw the communion lines forming and he thought he caught a glimpse of the new usher staring at him, but he couldn't be sure. He needed to concentrate on the song. People knew this one; people wanted to hear it exactly as they remembered it, and it was a full house, so the sustain pedal wouldn't save him this time.
Once he made it through the chorus, he knew he could relax a little.
The "DNA fingerprinting" in Pitchfork's case came from semen that was left inside of the victims.
Ned had made it to the outskirts of Nashville faster than he expected. He still hadn't checked in with Mr. Cory, the owner of the piano store. He desperately needed an alibi. Old Mr. Cory could probably send Ned to the electric chair if he wasn't careful.
He got on Highway 386 and headed north. After 20 minutes, he exited in Gallatin and drove around until he found an area he thought was remote. There was a road called Cages Bend.
He liked the sound of that.
It sounded hopeful.
He took that until he came to a gravel road, which looked as if it led to an even more secluded wooded area.
In the rearview, he remembered the cloud of dust kicked up by the tires of the Riviera he had inherited from his father, the drunk, who had done to him what he had gone on to do to others.
In the rearview, the communion lines were still going strong. No sign of that new usher.
He came upon a bend in the road that looked totally secluded, as if no one had been there in years. He cut the engine and listened for a moment. The invisible cicadas high up in the trees made it sound as if a giant rattle snake was slithering around him, preparing to strike. He got out of the car.
He didn't know if it was the trees or the fields of tall grass, but something smelled like semen.
He opened the trunk with his keys and pulled out the hardshell suitcase. When he closed the trunk there was a rustling in the tall grass but when he looked, he saw only a herd of white tail deer scattering.
Initially he had planned on dumping the body and taking the suitcase home with him. He didn't think to bring a shovel. Then he heard the sound of a bush hog—a piece of farm equipment with spinning blades that cut vegetation and cleared the land. He couldn't tell which direction it was coming from. He checked to make sure his suitcase didn't have any labels on it or name tags. He then two black trash bags in his back seat and wrapped the suitcase – one bag around the top, the other on the bottom, and secured it with masking tape. Then he carried it into the woods and set it down in some brush. He began snapping tree branches off to make cover but as the bush hog got louder and closer he panicked, leaving it only partially covered.
The communion lines had dissipated. Everyone was sitting now, even the priest.
Everyone always knelt until the priest sat and Ned should never be playing if the priest was sitting but somehow, Ned had missed his cue.
He concluded "I Will Raise Him Up" softly, using the sustain to ease himself out.
He looked in the rearview and saw the priest staring at him.
As was the rest of the congregation.
They would all be coming for him soon enough.
Unless he could make it back down to Tennessee and get rid of that thing once and for all – assuming it hadn’t been found yet.
Somehow, deep down, Ned always knew it was going to happen.
He was raised up, alright.
Now it was just a matter of time.

‼️🚨‼️🚨‼️🚨EXPLANATION OF WHAT WE ARE TRYING TO DO HERE, THIS IS DUMBED DOWN TO EASY TERMS FOR EVERYONE EVEN PEOPLE WHO ARNT INTO STOCKS AND ARE HERE FOR FUN CAN UNDERSTAND TAKE 5 MINUTES THIS WEEKEND AND TRULY UNDERSTAND ALL OF THIS INFORMATION ‼️🚨‼️🚨‼️🚨 CREDIT: BIG BRAIN APE MAXIMUM PURPOSE
Please read this I copied and paste it from a super smart ape!!!!
Please read this I copied and paste it from a super smart ape!!!!
Alright lets get into it.
But before we do, I need to explain exactly what it means for a company to be "shorted" and as a response, be "short squeezed"
Ill explain in monkey speak first:
Imagine a store has a supply of 100 bananas for sale at 1.00 per banana.
Now, a certain animal (lets call this animal a bear) thinks that the cost per banana will drop from 1.00 dollar to 0.50 cents. They go to the store and they borrow 50 bananas promising to return them. The bear, now in debt to the store, sells those bananas at 1.00 each and collects 50 dollars. Then, the market price for a banana drops to 0.50, they go and buy back the 50 bananas (now at 0.50 cents) paying 25 dollars, then return them back to the person they bought them from. This relieves the bears from their debts and they pocket 25 dollars in the process.
This is the process of shorting a company. They will "Borrow" or "Short" a companies shares when they think it will drop. They sell those shares. The market price drops. Then they buy them back at a low price. Then return them to who they borrowed from and make some serious money.
Typically, this is done to companies who are not looking like they will have very much growth (i.e., GameStop in an increasingly electronic world. Or FFIE in a world where Chinese electric cars are being restricted from sales in the USA for foreign policy reasons.)
Now, a short squeeze happens when another animal (lets say a bull (or maybe an ape would actually be better)) decides that they don't really want the price of bananas to drop because they really really really really like bananas. So the ape goes to the store and buys all the available bananas as well as buying them from the bears. Now, since there's no more available, and bananas are in demand, the price rises up to 1.50, instead of dropping.
Now, the bears are in a dilemma. They need to return the bananas to the person they bought them from. If they don't, the person they borrowed from is going to start charging them late fees for every day that they don't return the bananas.
As you can imagine, the bears would be SUPER angry about this, and fight the apes tooth and nail to try to get them to sell. They will tell everyone (via the media) that the apes are bad. They will publish false information about the cost of bananas. They will try to borrow bananas from other people to make it seem like bananas arent worth anything.
BUT, if the apes hold onto their sweet, juicy bananas, then the bears cant get find any to buy even if they wanted to. So the apes eventually will say "I will give you my bananas back for a premium cost of 10 dollars. Now, the apes who bought all the bananas for 100 dollars will sell them back to get 1000 dollars instead.
Essentially, the apes can make the price whatever they want, because the bears are paying a late fee for every day that they don't return the original bananas. At some point, the late fee will become so expensive that they will pay whatever it takes to get the bananas back.
This is known as a short squeeze. And the apes can potentially make lots of money on those bananas.
Applying this to the market, if FFIE is being shorted, and you all decide you want to squeeze them. Then hold, your shares, the shorter will pay whatever it takes to get those shares returned.
Now, there are a few things that are required to make a short squeeze happen:

1. There needs to be an entity (hedge funds) who shorted the stocks, betting the price would decline. Very simple to find out as it is public information.
   
2. There needs to be an entity (You mad lads) who wants to make money off their shorts (this is a bit harder as y'all get scared of the fight back by them and sell out).
   
3. Time investment to make the hedge funds sweat about losing money on the shares they borrowed.
   

PHEW! That was tough. You did good though, Now, you are all experts on the idea behind a short squeeze.
Lets see if FFIE has the requirements needed to begin a short squeeze:

1. The shorts. On April 30th, and in my Last Post , I showed an image that the company FFIE was absolutely being shorted. In fact, 98% of the total shares of the company were being shorted. So yes, FFIE met requirement number 1.

Now, there has been ALOT of debate regarding the current number of shorts. And I'll help resolve WHY this debate has been ongoing. I believe that much of this debate lies in the differences between the terms "short volume" and "Short interest"
Many have been screaming that the short interest of a company is only posted every 2 weeks. Which is absolutely true.
Others have been posting that the shorted volume of FFIE is at VERY high numbers. Which is also true.
For those that don't understand the market, the short interest and short volume are interchangable. That is why so many of you have been so confused.
Im here to tell you, THEY ARE NOT THE SAME.
There are very clear differences between the two numbers and their reliability, in terms of a squeeze is extremely different. Ill try to make it simple for you and put your questions and confusions to bed.
STRAP IN! THIS IS TOTALLY NOT GOING TO BE BORING!
Official definition online for short interest from the fintel website:
"collected by FINRA from brokers twice a month and distributed by the stock exchanges. So, twice a month all the brokedealers add up all the short positions held in all of their custodial accounts — that means yours, mine, and all the hedge funds — and send the totals to FINRA."
Yawn am I right?
Yeah that was literally ctrl. C then ctrl . V onto this text. Doesn't seem too intuitive does it.
What the heck does this mean? Ape speak please?
The short Interest is the number of shares shorted by all of the different hedge funds. It is a comprehensive list of all the numbers of the total number of short shares.
However, it only represents a snapshot in time. Typically, it is a snapshot in time from the day that it is required to be reported. The most recent numbers came on today (5/24).
In general, this number can be manipulated. Think of it like taking a picture. Because that number is based on a snapshot in time, and hedge funds know when the picture will be taken, they can hide the number of shorted shares during the picture, and then once the camera takes its picture, they go back to normal. It is a way that the bears can lie about the fact that they borrowed shares.
Official definition online for short VOLUME from the FINTEL website:
the accumulated trades published to the consolidated tape. Every trade that is made is published in real time to the tape. At the end of the trading day, every trading venue publishes their volume numbers, which includes both Short Volume and Total Volume.
Jesus. That was a difficult read. Are you still awake?
Okay again. Super easy to understand. Right? Right? Yeah not so much. I hate the technical terminology used but I guess I can explain.
The short VOLUME is is a more accurate measure of how a particular stock is being shorted. I think of it more like a video tape. It is a collection of all shorting trades made, and is posted every day. It is a lot of information to sort through, but the numbers speak VOLUMES to the efficiency of a possible squeeze (haha volume. Get it?)
In the end, if the VOLUME of shorted shares remains high, then the company is relying on the price of the stock to decline, or trying to hold out when a squeeze is happening in the hopes that the price of the shares drop again. This is the number we care about. This number is COMPREHENSIVE of all shorted stocks (including off-exchange/darkpool numbers and retail shorts)
DONT WORRY ILL EXPLAIN WHAT OFF EXCHANGE/DARK POOL IS LATER
Here is another explanation in terms a dumb ape would understand:
Okay so using the previous "APE vs BEAR banana in supermarket example"
Lets start where the Apes have purchased all the bananas and we think the bears have shorted banana sales.
So, lets imagine that the laws require that the Bears post publicly exactly how many bananas they borrowed from the lender. They are required to post this information every 2 weeks. They know they have to post soon. Therefore, to scare the apes into thinking they aren't actually squeezing, they take their picture of their borrowed bananas and post it. In the picture (since they had time to organize their efforts) it shows that they, in fact, didn't borrow any bananas. Now the apes would be panicked right? They have all these bananas for no reason. But a SMART ape would understand that they could use that photo to manipulate us. They obviously just quickly hid the fact that they borrowed bananas for the picture. The bears used the required "short interest picture" to scare you all into thinking your bananas were worthless, and encourage you to sell them.
Instead, its better to look at the security footage of the bears hiding their borrowed banana receipts. We'd be able to catch them red handed! Thus, we look at the "short volume" of bananas. The problem is, each bear individually posts their volume every day, and doesn't compile it in one clear video for us. Why would they? The more we know, the more we can charge for our bananas.
Plus, there are also dozens (if not hundreds) of bears all posting, accurate, but misleading, numbers. They make a united effort to throw as many confusing, and non-relevant videos into the mix to divert our attention.
This is EXACTLY what you have seen posted all week. Various people posting different volume numbers. And while each volume number they posted is accurate, they are only a partial truth.
FREE BANANA TO ANYONE WHO CAN TELL ME WHERE WE GET THE COMPILED, ACCUATE DATA.
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Well, with the report of the "snapshot" that is released every 2 weeks, we also get another bit of information. The total number of exchanged shorts "off exchange."
Are you still following? This is where it gets even more confusing.
With the report, FINTEL also publishes a number known as the "off exchange short volume"
Processing img e97flyiznf2d1...
This number is the most accurate number to describe how many shares of a stock are currently being shorted. As we learned above, the "short interest" isn't reliable as the bears can hide their numbers during the picture.
However, at some point, some smart person (probably being super angry at how the bears could lie using short interest pictures) made a law that requires them disclose the number of currently exchanged "off market/dark pool" exchanges that were made.
An off market exchange is what happens when a bear decides to trade with another bear out of the public eye.
Why would they do this?
Back to our "ape speak" example
Okay so the bears know that they have their upcoming (2-week) picture that gets released. They want to make it seem like they don't have any owed bananas.
What do they do? How can they just lie for a picture?
The answer is in off market exchanges. You see, the bears found out that they can trade their shorts WITH EACHOTHER.
So for the picture, Mr. Black bear gives all his receipts to the polar bear. Then, when the Mr. Polar bear takes his photo, he gives them to Mr. Black bear (since he already took his photo).
These off market exchanges tend to SKYROCKET during a few times. One of which, is when hedge funds try to hide how much of an investment they have in their shorted shares.
So, over the next few days, we will see many people posting "OMG THEY ARENT EVEN SHORTING BECAUSE THE SHORT INTEREST IS DOWN FROM LAST POST"
Well, of course its lower. The last posted information, the hedge funds didn't know they would be squeezed. Therefore, they didn't feel the need to hide the short interest. Now, they need to hide it to scare you. So they create fear by lowering that number. But when that short interest number goes down, and off exchange goes up, it means they are still holding shorts, but just covering it up for their short interest reports.
Okay, so lets look at these numbers and see what it means for squeezers.
LONG STORY SHORT, THEY HAVE NOT NOT RETURNED THEIR SHORTS. They are simply trying to manipulate us into believing that they did.
In fact, they went from 36 million shorts UP to 64 million shorts (likely a bit less as this number includes transfers of shorts both ways).
But still, they have hope. Let's strip it away from them and make it KNOWN that they are manipulating. Time to HOLD and TIME TO BUY.
When you hold/buy shares, then the second requirement and third requirement for the squeeze are in our hands entirely.
Now, I know there's alot more to say, but I know people are waiting for my post so Im going to cut it short here. Ill make another post this weekend regarding the specific trading patterns we saw on the day-to-day that imply that the bears were trying to make us panic sell our shares.
Processing img eh2rvx6srf2d1...
Good Luck everyone. DMs are open for questions and corrections that might be needed.
With love,
MP- guardian APE

Hi,
Just wanted to share my story. In December, I had sudden onset distorted vision, intense headaches, nausea, pulsatile tinnitus, and vomiting. I went to urgent care, they ordered an MRI that I was able to get the next day, and it demonstrated elevated optic discs and suggested I had elevated intracranial pressure. I got sent to the ER, was admitted to neurology services, got an LP (opening pressure 62), had a lumbar drain for 3 days, had cerebral venous manometry testing, and followed that with stent placement. I was hospitalized for 2 weeks total.
The plavix for the stent caused super heavy periods and I almost bled to death because when I told my gyno about them, she said my hemoglobin from 10 days beforehand was normal and I didn't need to be worried. I thought my extreme weakness and shortness of breath were from the diamox and didn't go back to the ER until I started having a fluttering sensation in my chest. Ended up getting 4 units of blood transfused, which was roughly equivalent to volume I had left. After that, I started medication to stop my period but it only ever reduced it in severity.
The one thing that was drilled into my head was the importance of losing weight. I'd gained maybe 50 lbs during the past year and a half, and was at my heaviest of 300 lbs. I focused on tracking my calories and started working with a personal trainer. I couldn't do much in the beginning but gradually lost some lbs and got stronger (thank you, iron supplements and protein bars). Eventually, I got the point where I could even do barre classes, slowly started incorporation hikes, and found a friend to play pickle ball with.
I was fortunate enough to get a 6 month medical leave of absence from my job as a nurse and have used the time to work on my physical and mental health (started therapy). I just met with my neuro ophthalmologist last week and have no more papilledema, which is incredible because I was at grade 4 when I was diagnosed. We are going to have me come off diamox in a couple weeks and closely monitor with monthly follow ups to see if I'm actually in remission.
I felt compelled to share my story because I know how frustrating and hopeless it can feel to deal with this disease, but hopefully it isn't like that for us forever.

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My managers make up a lot of rules on the fly, don’t put anything in writing and enforce them whenever they feel like it. Half of the stuff they do goes against company policy to the point of patient endangerment, which I have mentioned to both them and my union rep. I recently caught them breaking a pretty big rule and reported it to our anonymous reporting hotline. We are a very small ICU, so combined with me mentioning this egregious policy break to them, it wouldn’t be hard to figure out who put in the report. Now they are falsifying documentation for their fake rules under my name, giving me worse assignments, cutting off any help and support other nurses get, complaining about me to other nurses, not answering my emails and randomly changing my schedule. Since I started here almost a year ago, they have told me multiple times that this isn’t the place for me and that they would support me finding somewhere else to work. I’ve told my union rep about this too and they are no help whatsoever. When I told a couple of coworkers about this, they said that this is just what they do and how they are and that I’m not the first person they’ve treated like this.
I’m at a complete and total loss of what to do. I’m not in a good enough financial situation to up and quit and even if I was, I don’t want to be bullied into giving them what they obviously want. This is a good hospital. I like the people I work with, my patients and the work I do. I feel like I’m going crazy. I’ve never worked anywhere like this. What would you do if you were me?