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2024.05.14 08:34 wolveroot What GAP to request from European or American companies with 2 years of experience?

I am a machine learning engineer, with a master's degree in Computer Science, working for an Italian startup for almost 2 years. The only idea of GAP I have is here in Italy, but abroad I have no idea how to orient myself. Right now I am interviewing with European and American companies and when asked about my desired GAP I have no idea how to answer. Any advice?
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2024.05.14 07:37 LucyAriaRose New Update: My friend keeps on talking about my ex in front of my fiancee

I am STILL NOT the Original Poster. That is u/ta-bff-234324. He posted in AITAH and amiwrong but posted the same text in both subreddits. I chose to use the ones from AITAH
Thanks again to u/Literally_Taken for the rec and to Choice Evidence and u/chickenoodledeprived for letting me know about the update!
Previous BORU here. New update marked with ****\*
Trigger Warning: racism
Mood Spoiler: tentatively happy ending
Original Post: April 1, 2024
My (29M) best friend Jess (29F) keeps on mentioning my ex (29F) in front of my fiancee, and I am thinking of cutting her off. I want to know if I am overreacting, or if Jess is in the wrong.
For context, Jess and I went to the same high school and the same college. We were friends in high school. However, since we both went to the same out-of-state college, we became best friends since then. We have always been there for each other during the best and worst times. However, things have always been platonic, and she is more like a big sister to me, who made sure I stay on the right track.
I have only been in two long-term relationships so far. One was with my ex Lisa for 7 years. We met in college and dated all through our college years. Lisa and Jess also became good friends, too. After college, Lisa and I just grew apart and had different goals in life. I became "boring" after college as I was working on my PhD while doing a full time job. Lisa broke up with me as she wanted to party on weekends, while I was home studying. I was heartbroken, but I don't think I ever blamed her or had resentment towards her, as I understood my decisions were selfish and should not hold her back from having the best life.
Jess always stood by me and comforted me during that time. Jess and Lisa were good friends and Jess always kept on telling me that Lisa loves me and will be back one day when I am ready. I foolishly held on to that hope and stayed friends with Lisa. That was until I met my fiancee Yang. After I finished my PhD, I got a nice job in a big tech company. Yang joined our team a year after me. We started going out for drinks, and dinner and we started dating seriously pretty soon. We are happy together, and financially in a great place. Needless to say, I stopped talking to Lisa after I started dating Yang.
I proposed to Yang a year after we started dating and got engaged last year. Jess has been acting weirdly since we got engaged. One of the first things she said to Yang after we got engaged was how I had planned the same thing for Lisa (proposing on a local hiking trail). It was a bit off-putting that she was bringing up Lisa whom I broke up with almost 5 years ago on such a happy occasion. However, Yang asked me to not spoil my mood, as she felt Jess was just commenting on how I had that plan in mind for years. Since then, every time we meet, Jess without fail brings up Lisa and how the things I am doing are all the things I had planned with Lisa. This happened when we bought a house, planned for vacations, etc. Jess always starts with some nostalgic story and then brings up how Lisa and I were so happy together. She is still good friends with Lisa and keeps giving me updates about Lisa and how great Lisa is doing at work when no one is asking for it. It felt like she was painting a rosy picture of Lisa to Yang and telling Yang that she would always be second to Lisa.
Yang told me Jess's comments bothered her, and I also felt the same. I have brought this up with Jess many times and asked her not to do it. However, she says she will try but since I dated Lisa for 7 years, she would be part of many stories from the past. Also, she asked me why talking about Lisa bothers me and if I still have feelings for her. I have reduced hanging out with Jess. However, she is close with my mom and is always invited to all our family parties and holidays.
I talked to my mom and sister about this and they feel I am overreacting. They feel Jess is just telling stories and since the stories are mostly from college days and later, Lisa will be a character in the story. They also feel I should not be bothered by Jess mentioning Lisa since we broke up a long time ago. I feel that it's disrespectful to Yang as she doesn't need to hear about all the fun Lisa and I had when we were together and how we were planning to get married. Do you think I am the asshole to stop here or Jess is truly acting out of line?
Relevant Comments:
Commenter: Probably need to separate your time with your fiancé away from your friend. ... On a side note, your friend comes across poorly on one other aspect. When you were too busy to date so you could study. She is encouraging you to stay available while your ex goes about dating around? Think she ever encouraged your ex to not? Or do you think she was telling your ex she could have all the fun she wanted cause you'd still be around? Food for thought.
OOP: She thought we were 24 when we broke up and she always justified that Lisa was young and it's natural to date around before you settle down. She also encouraged me to do the same. However, after my breakup, I decided that I would not be in a relationship (based on what happened to the previous one) and never dated anyone until after I graduated.
Commenter: Not wrong, in fact it's thoughtful of your finace's feelings. " Jess always kept on telling me that Lisa loves me and will be back one day when I am ready." - yikes.
An easy: "Jess, you keep bringing up my ex, and keep making comments which are dismissive of my relationship with Yang. I am telling you point blank that this is harming our friendship and it saddens me that you dismiss my feelings as being unimportant on this topic. If you can't respect me, and my relationship with Yang, please understand why it will likely end our friendship."
OOP: We have had this exact conversation. Jess then proceeded to ask Yang is she offended by her telling stories about me. Yang was polite and said she is ok. Then she told me I am being too sensitive.
Commenter: Op do you know if Lisa is married? Maybe Jess is trying to sabotage your engagement so you can be with Lisa.
OOP: I know Lisa is single. She has not been in any serious long term relationship after me. Infant, Jess always makes it a point to bring that up regularly and update me, even after I tell her I have no interest. My mom loves gossip and they also discuss a out Lisa regularly.
Jess is just being a mean girl/have you talked to Lisa at all?
At this point, I suspect Jess is just being mean to Yang. I would have cut her off long ago if she was not so close to me or my family for so many years.
Lisa is out of the picture, to be honest. I have completely gone no contact with her for the last 2 years.
Jess has feelings for you:
That's not true. I did not write it since I thought it was irrelevant, but Jess is happily married and has a 3 year old kid.
There is no consensus bot on AITAH, but top comments were NTA
Update Post: April 23, 2024 (22 days later)
I wrote a post a month ago regarding my friend Jess mentioning my ex constantly in front of my fiancée. Thanks to everyone who commented, and how inappropriate it was. However, the last month has been nothing but crazy and I still trying to make sense of what happened so far.
After my post, I decided to talk to Jess and gave her an ultimatum not to speak about my ex Lisa again. I know Jess and Lisa are still friends, but I was uncomfortable of her comparing my fiancée Yang with Lisa all the time. I broke up with Lisa 5 years ago, and she is nothing but a faint memory in my past. Jess kept on defending herself and telling me that I was with Lisa for most of my adult life and it's hard to tell any stories from the past without including her. She also blamed me for being emotionally childish and just forgetting about Lisa when she was with me for 7 years. Finally, Jess agreed that she will not bring up Lisa in front of Yang, and I should also not treat Lisa as she does not exist since she is still Jess's friend. I informed Yang about our conversation. Although she was appreciative about it, she said I did not need to do it and she knows how much I love her and every time Jess brings up my Lisa, she feels sorry for Lisa that she let a guy like me go.
Yang went to visit China two weeks ago for a month as we plan to get married in her hometown. She is taking care of her shopping as well as preparations for the wedding. Jess invited me to her house that Friday for dinner as I was home alone. I am also good friends with her husband, and we were all just chatting and drinking in the living room. Around 7.30pm, the doorbell rang, and Jess excitedly went to open the door. To my surprise, it was fucking Lisa at the door. She was all dressed up as if she were ready for a date and came in. I had not seen her in person for almost 3 years and I was shocked to see her. She sat down and started making small talk with me. I was extremely uncomfortable and went into the kitchen to talk to Jess. I was angry at her and asked her what was going on. She kept on telling me that it's been 5 years since the breakup and to get over it and be nice to Lisa. She said Lisa was excited to meet me and she thought we were all adults and could have one fun evening together. We had a fight and I told her that she should not have invited Lisa after our conversation the other day and I do not want to be friends with her anymore. I went into the living room and politely excused myself and told everyone that I had a work emergency and had to leave early. Lisa looked sad, but I genuinely felt uncomfortable to be made to hang out with my ex without my consent.
I came home and called Yang. I have never seen her more furious, and she told me she is not comfortable with Jess anymore as she has some agenda that we do not know about. It's different to talk about Lisa, but to invite her without consulting is not ok. I also felt the same and I called Jess the next day and told her that she crossed a line, and I was terribly upset with her. I stopped taking her calls and ghosted her. I also told my mom and sister about the whole incident.
Last Sunday, my mom called me for lunch. When I got there, I saw Jess was already there. I told my mom that I do not want to talk to Jess and can't stay. However, she asked me to sit as they all wanted to talk to me. I have a glutton for punishment and decided to hear them out. My mom started with how Jess has been there for me all these years and only has my best interest at heart. She kept on telling me that they are the three people (mom, sister, and Jess) that love me the most. Jess started saying how she felt that I was making a big mistake in not having to hear what Lisa had to say. She told me that Lisa was my first love and Lisa is now ready to settle down and we can pick where we left off. She reminded me how broken I was when Lisa left me and how life is giving me a second chance. My sister also chimed in and said how they all liked Lisa more than Yang and how we both looked so great together. Finally, my mom started saying how our culture was so different than Yang and it is hard for them to relate to her. I asked them in what way, and my mom said that they did not understand what Yang says sometimes and have nothing in common with her. Then my mom asked me to think about how Lisa and I would have such wonderful looking kids, while if I marry Yang, our kids will look so different. I started getting their drift and I probed more. My mom told me how our kids would look Asian with "small eyes" and not like any others in the family.
I asked my mom if she cared about my kids looks more and not about how smart they will be since Yang has a PhD. She blew it off, and I realized she just did not want me to marry Yang because she was Chinese and not white. My mom told me to forgive Jess and my mom asked Jess to talk to Lisa on my behalf and asked her if she would be interested in getting back together with me. My mom was adamant that since I loved Lisa so much, I should be happy and pick up things where we left off as that is the best for everyone. I have never been so angry and may have said a lot of unkind things to all of them before I left
I am so depressed right now. I not only lost my best friend, but also am not sure how I can move on from what my mom said. My mom and sister raised me and that is the reason where I am today. However, I cannot get over how racist they are being and how they were just pretending to like Yang all these years while actively working on breaking us up. I have been so shocked that I have not told any of this to Yang so far. I might wait for her to come back next week and talk to her in person.
Again, thanks everyone for all your messages on the last post as they helped me a lot to think through the situation. My life is more fucked up than I could imagine, and I cannot imagine how dejected Yang will feel after hearing all this.
*****New Update Post: May 7, 2024 (5 weeks after OG post)****\*
I wrote a post two months ago regarding my best friend Jess constantly bringing up my ex when talking to my fiancée Yang. I wrote an update two weeks ago about my mom, sister and Jess scheming about trying to get me back with my ex Lisa because they were uncomfortable with Yang being Chinese. They tried to do it when my fiancée was visiting her parents and I felt so betrayed by their actions.
As I said in the previous post, I blew up on my mom and sister about what they said and immediately left. I did not take calls from them or answer texts for the next several days. Their messages initially were anger towards me on why I left before they could finish what they wanted to say. However, I think they realized on day 3 that they might have crossed the line this time and became extremely apologetic. I finally messaged them to leave me alone and not to contact Yang or I until we contact them. Jess did not message me the whole time.
I did not tell Yang about the situation until she came back home 9 days ago. I initially did not know how to bring up the subject, but she sensed something was wrong and asked me about it. I was so worried about hurting her, but I told her about what happened. I was upfront about the stunt Jess pulled and she was angry at Jess. I also told her about my visit to my mother's place, but she did not react with any anger. She just asked me if I was ok.
The next few days were confusing where I was more upset than Yang. She was just excited showing me all pictures and telling me stories. Finally, on last Thursday evening, she opened up and asked me if I was ok about my mom's behavior and what I plan to do. I told her my thoughts and how I cannot forgive them for what they said about her being Asian and them wanting me to marry a Lisa because she was white. I asked her why she was not more upset as it was bothering me.
She told me that when she told her parents about me, they had the exact same reaction for her dating someone who was not Chinese. Her family is very traditional, and her parents were very upset about her decision. It took them a few months to warm up to me and accept me. She never told me about this because she wanted me to have good relationship with her parents. She told me that now they are the most excited doing arrangements for our wedding.
She told me that she has always felt something was off when she talked to my mom, my sister or Jess and they did not like her. My mom and sister would be very friendly with her in front of me, but never invited her for anything when I am not around. She suspected that it may be due to fact that she is not white and does not understand the American traditions. She said she is not upset with them and now that this is in the open, she should talk to them and assure them that she would be as good of a wife as Lisa or any other girl. She said that she does not want to break a family in order to start a new one.
Despite my protests, Yang invited my mom and sister for lunch on Sunday. She said that it would be good for us to talk about everything and hear why they are concerned about her marrying me. I was really not happy with this, but Yang spent most of Sunday morning cooking for them.
When my mom and sister arrived, there were a lot of waterworks and apologies. My mom apologized to Yang and me for her behavior and told us that she would never bring it up again. My sister also was quiet and had tears in her eyes. There were a lot of blame games. My mom and my sister were blaming Jess for constantly telling them how Yang might not be great for me and how she won't fit into our family. My mom and sister fought with Jess after I left and Jess blamed Lisa. Based on Jess's story, Lisa has been depressed for the last few years and when I suddenly got engaged to Yang, it became worse. Jess thought I was also depressed after Lisa left me, because I did not date anyone for 3 years. In reality, I just wanted to focus on my work and studies and never had time. So, Lisa convinced Jess that she has to get back together with me as that is what I wanted too. Jess said how sorry she felt for Lisa as she was her longtime friend and listened to her plan as she thought it was good for everyone.
My mom and sister told us that I should stay away from Jess because she orchestrated the whole situation. They kept on hugging Yang and apologizing to her. Yang in turn also started crying and telling them that she will do better to fit in with them. It was all a big mess. I am still skeptical of my mom's change in heart, but I also want to see Yang happy. However, I think it will take a lot of time and healing before I could truly trust my mom and sister.
Currently, my mom invited us to lunch at her place next week and told me that Jess will not be there. Jess has still not message me or Yang. I really don't know what I can do in this situation. I am still upset and furious at my mom, but I also want to respect Yang's effort to keep the family together. Thanks to everyone for all the messages and supportive comments. It really helped reading them when I was feeling very sad.
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2024.05.14 07:17 Lollybug3739 Just Thinking Out Loud-Advice Welcome

I have been dating my long-distance boyfriend for almost four months now. I can't remember being this happy and excited in years. He makes me feel safe, welcome, wanted, all the things that I feel I don't often get from my family. We are seriously considering getting married. Yes, I know it is very fast, but my parents were married after only a few months, and have been married almost 30 years.
My boyfriend lives in Germany and I am from the US. I grew up in a religious household, while he does not believe in the Christian God. I personally am not too bothered by this-except for my family. Because we are "uber" religious, I have had numerous talks, chats, and even public confrontations over my even considering dating a non-Christian, much less marrying one. Recently, I received a medical diagnosis completely out of the blue: I went to the ER for a skin infection and walked out with a diagnosis for type 2 diabetes. My entire lifestyle is being uprooted and changed so I can get my health under control. However, this diagnosis has me unsure of where I stand with my faith. I haven't told any of my family that my faith is nearly gone, that I am tired of being a part of the American church anymore. Even my boyfriend, very respectfully of course but still firmly, is telling me that ignoring this issue is not an option.
On the note of public confrontation: I was yelled at (at least voices raised to me) by my grandfather in a public restaurant after I announced to him mine and my boyfriend's intent to hopefully get married. He spouted off saying that he could not congratulate me on a forthcoming marriage when my bf and I would be unequally yoked in a religious sense. It was my fault for telling him, I knew what would happen and I did it anyway. I did not respond to him at all, simply listened, and walked away when he was finished.
My parents are a bit more understanding. Whatever differences we have, or how I feel about them (our relationship can be a little strained at times because of them constantly gone or focused on other things/my siblings), they have spoken to me quite seriously about marrying someone not of my faith. But, my dad has specifically told me that everything I choose, it is on me. They cannot stop me, nor will they try. I'm finally feel like I'm being seen as an adult, maybe not among every single person in my extended family, but I and my family are having fun discussing mine and my bf's plans for our future together.
We have decided that although we are very sure we want to get married, it is incredibly wise to get to know each other better. He is finding a place for me to come live for a little while in Germany, so that I can meet him and his family, and figure out if Germany is a place that I actually COULD live.
We've already been through a couple of really really tough life circumstances in just the few months that we have been together. I've watched us grow, especially myself in ways I never thought possible. He challenges me, yet allows me to be myself, constantly asks for my input on even the smallest things, dotes on me, and just is quite honestly the best person to ever walk into my life.
I don't really know what else to say. If anyone actually sees and reads this, and has questions or comments I'll do my best to answer them. Otherwise, I was just kind of throwing my thoughts out there in the closest relevant space I could find and seeing what would happen. Thank you for your time. :)
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2024.05.14 06:21 No_Argument2217 Girlfriend of 4 years that I was planning proposing to flushed away her future with me by sleeping with a bunch of guys and "partying" away her savings. SUPER LONG

I currently (40M) had my ex (35F) completely destroy our relationship while I was working out of town for a few months. This happened a year ago and wish I had these stories as a resource while going through it. I have just started to use Reddit and been reading the experiences of others here and have decided to share my story in hopes it will maybe help others. That way some good may come from some of the worst times of my life.
A little backstory for context for the story and insight to some of the decisions I made. When I turned 30 I left the major city in my Province (it is like a state if you are an American) because buying just a simple house is over a million dollars and I don't make near enough to afford that. My goal was to move to somewhere more rural to buy a house, meet someone, get married and have a child or two. It was my only dream I had and believed I could attain it. I lived out in the bush on my step dads property in a run down trailer I bought so I could save money for the first 3 years. I had my dog but the loneliness of living in the middle of nowhere had got to me. By then I had saved a fair amount of money, so I decided to move into the town. It was nice, it cut my commute down by 40 minutes, I had started to make a few friends and no longer felt so isolated. It was through my friends I met my future ex. Let's call her Kali. She had a long term boyfriend when we first met. Their relationship ended a couple of years after meeting her and we started dating a few months after.
We mostly had a great relationship for the next 4 years. The only thing was it was on again off again. She would dump me after I did anything really special for her for a week and beg me to take her back. It was like clockwork. I used to think it was because of her depression and that she didn't believe she deserved to be truly happy. Nowadays I actually think she might have been cheating the whole time and just felt guilty about it when I did nice stuff for her but I will never know the truth. I don't care what the reality is anymore anyway, Time has a funny way of making stuff like that irrelevant. We did have one bigger break of about 5 months. When it happened I took time off work to travel in my RV the whole time. From spring to summer. I really didn't like the town I lived in and decided to use that time to check out the rest of my Provence to figure out where I wanted to restart my life. She was basically the only reason I stayed for so long. I did have a decent job and family close by but most people I met there were not good people. Lots of drug users, liars, and general scumbags. I had only a few real friends there. After I got back and had decided where I was going to move to she had decided she wanted me back. She begged me to stay and be with her. She told me that she wanted to get serious. We started making real progress about getting married, having kids and looking at buying a house. Everything was coming up Milhouse and I couldn't be happier. So You can probably guess this is when my tale becomes interesting for you and life got real bad for me.
My career is seasonal. I work from spring to the end of fall and can go on unemployment insurance or find work. My dad had asked if I could help on his farm breeding horses that winter when I had still planned to leave my town. I had promised him that I would because it would give me a place to stay before people in my field of work would be looking for employees. This had been agreed upon before me and Kali had got back together. Now I have always been a man of my word. It's something I take great pride in. I have always hated liars. I don't mind a little embellishment to make a story more fun or if two people's stories are different as long as they both believe that was how the events happened. Everyone remembers things slightly off. She was upset that I had intended to keep my word to my dad but I had every second weekend off. The town my dad is in was only a 2 hour drive. So I told her I would be back twice monthly for weekends and that it would only be for 4 months. For the first two months everything seemed fine. During this time I started to look at rings to pop the question and booked an expensive spa for two days in May to propose. There was only one weird thing that happened during the first two months. On one of my visits she confided in me that her brother's wife had cheated on him and that their newborn baby was most likely not his. I was shocked that she not only knew but didn't plan to tell him. She said she didn't want to tell him for fear of breaking up the family. I told her that he has the right to know and that she was being a bad sister by knowing and not telling him. I also informed her if he found out she knew and didn't say anything that he would most likely kick her out of his life. She made me swear I wouldn't tell him. Even though I thought it was wrong I did agree to not say anything. It did get me wondering how she could not only not tell him but stay friends with someone that could do that to her brother. I think that's when I started to question her morals. The third month she asked that I didn't come out because she was "sick". I told her I didn't care, I could still come out and take care of her. She convinced me that she didn't want me to come so I just worked on the farm instead. I switched weekends so I could come out the next instead of in two weekends. The weekend she was "sick" her phone was off the whole time, lasting into the week. She told me her phone went through the washing machine. She was actually on a bender but I didn't learn that till later.
So I head out the following weekend. As soon as I arrive I start getting super sketchy vibes. I was already weirded out about the stuff with her brother and ghosting me for 4 days as we talked/texted multiple times a day normally. At first she acts great to me, cooks me steak and we go out to the bush to have a fire in the snow. At the fire she really started drinking heavily. She then mentions a guy she had been hanging with lets call him Brad. So alarm bells start going through my head. We go back to her house and she keeps drinking. I wanted to keep a clear head so I only had three beers all evening. She put her phone down unlocked because of how drunk she was and I took it to the bathroom with me to look up texts between them. I felt so guilty for doing it at first but once I see the text between the two of them the guilt is replaced with rage. I go to her room to confront her and she breaks down. First, how dare I go through her phone, this never would have happened if I would have broken my promise to my dad, nothing really happened between them, blah, blah, blah. I was furious and drove off. She blows up my phone the whole time. I don't answer. Ten minutes after I left her mother called me. She lives at her moms house. I took the call and her mom said she is freaking out and has harmed herself. I decide to go back and she has a bandage wrapped around her arm. Her mom hid all the sharp objects she could find. She was having a full on panic attack and begs me to not leave. I told her I would stay if she told me the truth. She admits to hooking up with him one time just that last weekend when she asked me not to come out. It kind of matches the messages and I believe her. I stay there till she falls asleep. Once she does I send Brad a text saying that she has a boyfriend with some screen shots of our conversations me and her have had that week. I was about to drive back to the farm when the dude called her phone. I pick up the call and tell him I am her boyfriend. He asks if that was a joke and I assure him it is not. He said he didn't know and actually apologized. I tell him that I'm pissed but if he didn't know I couldn't blame him. I should have asked him more questions but I was tired, not thinking straight and just wanted to go back to the Farm even though it was two am by this point. I get home and crash. Turned my ringer off because I know once she wakes up she will start calling like crazy. After getting the horses in for the night I decided to look at my phone for the first time all day. Around thirty missed calls and a ton of texts. I decide I need another day before I talk to her. Now while the whole day all I can think about is that it was just one time, she seems to be genuinely remorseful about it, how I'm 39 and really want children before I get too old. I took a call from her the next day on Sunday in the morning. She is still wasted. She hadn't stopped drinking since I was there Friday. We talk and I tell her that I am really upset but am willing to give us another chance. I still was in love with her and wanted to have kids, get married and buy a house with her. It was the dream I felt I worked so hard for. She was so happy I took her back and swore to me nothing like this would ever happen again. Basically I was a fool lol.
So I decided on my next set of days off to borrow my stepdads summer home on the river so we can have the place to ourselves. I grab food that she loves so I can cook her dinner and try to make it very romantic. I want to rekindle my love with her so I wanted to go all out on an amazing weekend. I pick her up and she is already a little drunk. I kind of wanted to hang sober but I don't wanna mess up with her so don't say anything thinking we can do a sober day when I take her out to go shopping and dinner the next day. When we get there she gets hammered. Kali had brought a big of bottle fireball on top of a bunch of white claws. I again didn't really drink that night. Once she was drunk and tired I carried her to the bed. As Kali is in my arms she looks up at me and says in slurred words "I don't know why you even felt threatened by Joe" I ask "what did you just say?". "I don't know why you even felt threatened by Brad" she replied. I put her to bed and my mind starts racing. Now her ex before me has a really close name to the one she said first but I also know she has a friend named Joe I only met a couple of times. They were not close or even hung out but were more like acquaintances. I go in her purse to look at her phone again but the battery is dead and I can't find her charger. I have an Iphone so I can't charge it up to look. I didn't sleep that well that night with everything going on in my head. I woke up at 6 am to her being very loud on the phone. I went out to the living room and she had drank all the booze left over from the night before. I ask her who she was on the phone with and she tells me an uber to leave. I ask why is she going to leave? Kali tells me she is upset that I tried to get into her phone. Guess I didn't put it back in her purse. Must have been out of sorts and forgot. I tell her I can drive her once I go to the washroom and get some clothes on. I go to do that, come out of the washroom to see Kali has already left. She was so drunk that she had left half her stuff behind. I decided to have breakfast before bringing her stuff to her house. After breakfast I packed her stuff into my SUV and noticed it had snowed that night. I could see her footprints out into the driveway. While Dropping off her stuff I noticed there were no footprints leading to her house, so I tried calling Kali. No answer. I left her stuff in the snow and decided to drive by her brothers and sisters house to see if there were footprints going into any of their houses but there were none. I sent her a nasty text about knowing she didn't go home, to go be with Brad or Joe or whoever and never call me again. It was a lot more profane than that but that's the gist of it. Cleaned up the house my stepdad lent me and back off to the farm yet again. The next day she blows up my phone and again I wait another day to talk to her. She tells me that she went home but I know that can't be true from the snow, but she says I must have been mistaken. She apologizes for getting drunk and leavening and that she is going to stop drinking after her birthday in two weeks. She has rented a hotel in the town I'm in for her birthday and wants to spend it with me. I agree just because I have to know the truth and want to look at her phone to make sure I am not crazy. She had gaslit me to the point I was questioning what I saw with my own eyes. A couple of days later I decided to send Joe a message on Facebook to see if he would give me the truth. I get a text from her telling me not to bug her friend and that she is embarrassed. I apologize and tell her I am excited about her birthday soon.
The weekend of her birthday comes so I go to meet her at the hotel. She brought her sister and other friend along. It actually is a really fun time. The girls did coke the first night into the second evening. I don't really like it but I figured she can let loose especially if she is going to stop drinking after her birthday. I also knew by Saturday night that they would all crash hard so it would give me time to look at her phone so I could know the truth. As I mentioned the weekend was really fun so I felt bad about going into her phone yet again. I did it anyway and my whole world came crashing down. Now I figured that I would maybe see Brad or Joe texts and Facebook messages. Seemed like Brad was done but Joe and her were totally hooking up. I also found out that she had slept with 3 other guys. I also saw she was using coke all the time now. She did it maybe three times a year when we dated but now it was every weekend. It looked like she started using regularly right before I left for the farm. Joe helped get it for her too, out of all the guys he was the one she hung with the most. Turns out he was also a meth head who was trying to quit for her. She also went to his house the morning she left the other weekend to hook up and buy coke. I was floored. I just staired and took screen shots till the early morning. I decided I wasn't just going to dump her but I wanted to ruin her life not realizing she was already doing that all by herself but hindsight is 20 20. So I started coming up with a plan of what I was going to do. I woke up the next morning and acted like everything was fine and went back to the farm. I was still so upset and didn't want to harm myself or others so had a family friend take my firearms for a while. I don't think I would have used them on myself or others but I knew I wasn't thinking clearly and didn't want them in my house while I was like that.
I didn't have to see her till I moved back because the next set I had off I had tickets for a concert in the city I used to live in. During that time all I thought about was how I was going to do something to ruin her life. I came up with some small things but my main plan was to pretend like we were fine and ghost her when my contract was up with my boss next winter. I had promised him another year after kali and I had gotten back together. Just typing it out makes me look back and cringe that I was so crazy. When I went to the city for the concert I told my best friend, my brother and a few others my plan. No one liked it and thought I should just go no contact, cut her straight out of my life. That probably was the smart thing to do but emotion was clouding my judgement. Also you all would get this story. They even informed me that because I would be lying to her, that I would be compromising my morals and turning into a worse person they didn't recognize. I either didn't see it that way or care. I have a hard time recalling what my brain was thinking during that time. All seems like a haze now that it's been a year. I think I was really upset that my dream and all I had worked for was ruined. A friend later said I may have been in love with the dream and not her. Maybe that's the reason I kept up all this insanity.
My time on the farm had come to an end and I was moving back to the town me and my ex lived in. I was set with my plan, excited to implement it and have what I considered just. But you know what they say of the best laid plans. My ex wanted to go to hang at her brothers as a welcome home party. I went but ended up drinking. Heavily drinking, to the point of black out. I don't remember much from that night but have had it recounted for me. I woke up in the drunk tank. Guess I couldn't lie and play it cool then huh? The story I was told later is, while at her brothers I had gotten drunk and loud. Kept waking up the new baby and we were asked to leave. So we caught a cab and I confronted her in the cab but all I could do was call her a lying, cheating, whore on repeat. She got upset and ran into the house locking me out. I had a bunch of my stuff in her house so I went to the door and demanded she let me in. All the while still only referring to her as the aforementioned 3 words. She told me to leave but my jacket and wallet were inside. It was below freezing at night still and probably wouldn't have made it home in the state I was in. I then kicked in her door to keep calling her LCW and grab my stuff. She was on the phone to the police, so I was taken away by them. One of the lowest points in my life. It still brings me so much shame to this day but it is what happened and I am not going to sugar coat it. I never laid a finger on her and I am so happy that I hadn't. Laying hands on women in that way is one of the scummiest things a man can do. I had to go back to her house once they let me out because my stuff was still there. I apologized to her mom who had been at her boyfriends that evening promising to repair the door for her. Kali begged me to talk to her and like an idiot I didn't just leave. I told her I saw everything and she only admitted to Brad and Joe. Lying about them and the others the whole time. Even when I brought up the screen shots she still couldn't come clean. I left just shaking my head. There is still a ton to this story but this is long enough. I could do a part 2 if there is interest. Catching you folks up to where I am now and the messed up things that happened in between.
submitted by No_Argument2217 to cheating_stories [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 06:07 Mental_Method_6510 I dared to ask for a spot of nature where there's no cars. Every single answer is either a park where cars are allowed and with a parking lot in the center, or insulting me for being a Europoor who can't comprehend the greatness of American car-centric architecture

submitted by Mental_Method_6510 to fuckcars [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 05:57 zombiefiedmind Hill Z/D Cat Food. Cat loves it. But her GI system doesn't seem to agree.

Hello cat friends!
Here is a little about my cat Holly
History:
I adopted Holly from my grandmother in late January 2024, after my grandfather passed. She could not physically take care of Holly. I didn't know too much about Holly's medical history. My grandmother didn't have many records and the vet she used to take Holly to, didn't have old records because I guess they changed ownership or whatever. My grandparents fed Holly whatever was affordable, mainly Friskies wet food. Apparently these GI issues have been going on for some years.
Food causing issues added GI issues... maybe...???
The vet I took Holly to recommend Purina EN (wet food) since it is meant for GI issues and is high in protein. That way Holly could at least get some nutrition. She was on that for about 1 1/2 months. But didn't see improvement in her GI issues. As of April 27th, 2024, I slowly started transitioning Holly onto Hill Z/D (wet food) to see if a hydrolyzed diet would help.
Holly gets about 1 1/4 of the 5.5oz cans a day.
Week 1: giving her 25% new food with 75% old food. Week 2: 50% new 50% old. However, as over week 2, I've noticed her vomiting seems to be a bit better, but the diarrhea has gotten worse. Holly seems to really like the food, but I don't then it's liking here. I keep a detailed spreadsheet that tracks her bowel movements, vomiting, urination, and other things. Prior to the start of the transition she was having, on average 1 diarrhea a day and 0.5 vomits a day (this is over a recorded 39 days. I got each average by dividing that number of diarrheas or vomits by the number of days). During the transition, she is at an average of 1.41 diarrheas a day and 0.1 vomits a day (over a 17 days period).
I did notice that Hills Z/D is a lot higher in carbs compared to the other foods she was on. So I'm wondering if the carbs are playing a part in some of this. Also, there has been an uptick in her flatulence.
Food Transition Question:
Am I transitioning her too quickly? Most of the answers I found online were showing transitioning to a new food over 10 - 14 days. So I decided to go slower and do 25% increments every 7 days. But, since I've seen some increase in diarrhea while on 50% new 50% old, I haven't increased to 75% new. I'm still at 50% new and 50% old. Should I maybe go back to 25% new and 75% old for a few more weeks?
I am going to ask the vet as well, but I also like to hear from experience of others.
I appreciate if anyone answer any responses that could be helpful.
submitted by zombiefiedmind to catfood [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 05:51 OSHASHA2 ⚠️ Beware your Biases: a lesson on Intergroup Contact Theory and why you’ve never seen a UAP (probably)

If disguised under a preposterous or “absurd” appearance, [a UFO’s] effects would be undetected for a long time. I believe this could be a key to the confrontation with UFOs. ~Jacques Vallee
In 1954 the sociologist Gordon Allport published a book called The Nature of Prejudice. In it, he and some colleagues elucidated a link between increasing Intergroup Contact and reducing Racial Prejudice. At the time this was breakthrough research; repeated contact between members of the “in” and “out” group reduces stigma toward the “out” group.
In 1954 this could be easily illustrated by the attitudes of the public-at-large toward racial minorities over the preceding 100 years – shifting attitudes toward slaves and their descendants, as well as the previous 10 years – attitudes toward Japanese-Americans over the course of WWII.
As it turns out one of the most effective ways at reducing prejudice is “equal status contact between majority and minority groups in the pursuit of common goals.”
For African slaves, their descendants, Japanese-Americans, and countless others across history, this contact has been stained with blood and tears. But contact it was nonetheless, and our stigma toward these “out” groups declined overtime as they became part of the “in” group. They became ‘American’ and their “out” group identities and goals have become, and are becoming, less stigmatized.
Today, I believe we are watching this dissolution of stigma play out en masse on the world stage. The funny thing is that this time, all of humanity is part of a microcosmic “out” group and the aliens in their UFOs are part of the macrocosmic “in” group trying to get us to adopt their goals. What then, is so unsettling about humanity that they take such a slow-going route of stigma dissolution? Why don’t they just introduce themselves as equal status individuals?
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Attitude Rebound and Stigma
A few weeks ago I made the same post in both UFOs and Aliens. The post contained what I thought to be a reasonable, logical hypothesis that could easily explain away all paranormal phenomena… Yes, all paranormal phenomena. The post got about as much attention in each subreddit, however the reactions to its content was drastically different on each subreddit.
I will admit that I was being a little overzealous in my efforts to “raise the consciousness of humanity” and was proselytizing to some folks in the comments. My B 🙇🏻. What I found very very interesting, however, was how commenters on UFOs were much more critical and reductive than commenters on Aliens, who seemed more open to my zany hypothesis and its possibilities.
Now, I am not a physicist. I can barely remember the unit circle. I got a D in calculus at university. That is why/when I decided to get a liberal education rather than a scientific one. Having said that, I am very passionate about science and the scientific method. I am a nurse by trade, and for twelve hours a day, three days a week, according to my profession, I conduct three to five “n of 1” studies and report the results of these studies to a medical doctor. My job is to experiment on human beings and document outcomes.
What I observed when I made those posts was that one community was receptive and the other was hostile. I joined both UFOs and Aliens so that I could keep up to date on the latest disclosure news. I have noticed in my time browsing these subreddits that UFOs tends to request hard, ‘scientific’ data from posters, whereas Aliens seems to have more interest in the subjective experience of posters. Of course there is a lot of overlap given the content of these subreddits.
This is all just to say that the same message may be received differently, and it’s content interpreted differently, even by the same/overlapping populations, due to the stigma some individuals harbor. So I think it prudent that we introspect and hold an awareness of our own stigmas and biases, understanding they may be seated deep in our unconscious mind. We should reconsider the things we find absurd, for in the absurdity there may be a powerful lesson.
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Thank you to those who upvoted/downvoted and commented. Thank you for participating in this community. Thank you for being unwitting participants in this accidental study, and I will leave you with this quote from Gordon Allport:
It is here that we encounter the central theme of existentialism: to live is to suffer, to survive is to find meaning in the suffering. If there is a purpose in life at all, there must be a purpose in suffering and in dying. But no man can tell another what this purpose is. Each must find out for himself, and must accept the responsibility that his answer prescribes.
submitted by OSHASHA2 to UFOs [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 05:25 chronicanxietygirl All labs normal and he's not improving

My 11 yo (turns 12 in August) American curl cat has been acting very sick. He tends to vomit a lot and last year it started to become projectile. I took him into the vet that time and they ran a full blood work panel and said he looked fine. They recommended some hairball food and said to not worry about the vomiting unless he starts acting different than usual (he will eat and act normal usually when he projectile vomits). Two days ago I noticed his behavior was off. He wasn't as lovey and was avoiding me which is very unlike him. He's usually all up in my personal space. He has been walking extremely slow and I was convinced something was off but gave it a night. The next day he ate nothing and drank no water. I gave him one more day before calling the vet. Went in today for an appointment and he got a full bloodwork panel, his electrolytes checked, thyroids checked, and an ultrasound (also no fever). It was odd because he was purring the entire time at the vet (which he usually hates because he has very bad anxiety). The vet said his labs came back fine and he couldn't diagnose him. He gave him a shot of anti nausea medication as well as a steroid shot. He also got IV fluids. He sat on my lap on the car ride home purring and looking out the window and I was so relieved seeing him feeling better. The second i brought him back inside he was acting strange again. The vet said the steroid should increase his appetite and he should be hungry by dinner (this was at 2:30 pm). It's now 11:00 pm and he still refuses to eat or drink water. The vet told me to update him in a few days but if he doesn't drink water I feel like I have to call tomorrow since water is much more crucial than food. I'm panicking because there is no answer to why he's avoiding eating and drinking but if he is not going to drink water regardless of medication than i don’t know what to do. I feel helpless watching him suffer. He has distanced himself from me (very unusual) and just sleeps all day, moves very slowly, and has a super dry nose. I don’t know if it's just his time or what, because the vet said everything seemed normal. If anyone has experienced something similar please leave advice as I am not ready to let go of my childhood best friend.
submitted by chronicanxietygirl to catcare [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 04:42 raaz9658 [TOMT] [MOVIE SCENE] [2000-2010s] Two soldiers talking about why eating cow is fine but eating cat/dog isn't according to Americans

I watched it in a Facebook clip before the pandemic. And from the quality, I'm sure it released after 2000. Scene is - a group of soldiers are going somewhere in the back of a vehicle and they chat about why eating cows is fine but if you do the same with cats/dogs people are enraged.
One solder says why Indians worship cows, it's dumb. Because they eat cows. Other one says what about dogs/cats. He replies they are cute. So he says, the Chinese eat them, so they must be thinking Americans are dumb.
Please don't suggest random chatgpt answers.
submitted by raaz9658 to tipofmytongue [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 04:36 lunarwhispers98 How do I figure out their ethnicity for certain without a DNA test?

I've been working for months to try to unravel the complicated history of my ancestry, but I was wondering if anyone could point me in a better direction.
From what I've found so far, it looks like my great-grandfather was born in a Rusyn village that's in present-day Ukraine. From what I can tell, everything about him seems to line up that of Rusyn people: he was a coal miner, his last name is a Hungarian-ized (later American-ized) version of a Rusyn last name, he was Greek Orthodox, he settled in PA, etc.
But... my great-grandmother is a whole different story. The area she was born in changes on literally every document I've been able to find, and since the majority of my grandmother's siblings have passed away and my grandmother wasn't raised with her parents for very long, I'm having a really hard time putting the pieces together. I know boarders changed constantly in Europe due to the wars, but how do I begin to unravel that? Her maiden name is Polish but she was allegedly born in Czechoslovakia (some docs say Krompachy, some "Kossive," some say she was born in Austria, some say "Slovakland," and some say Dubrava without a country name). But her sister wrote that she was born in "Brgesko, Czechoslovakia" which isn't a place from what I can tell-- the only thing that comes up is Brzesko, Poland. This is, notably, the one that seems to be the most accurate however, since "Kossive" and Krompachy came out of no where.
Additionally, if she was in fact Polish, why wouldn't she just write that on the census documents? Her ethnicity was written as Slovak, Hungarian, and "Slavish" and she wrote her native language as "Slavish" many times, but that doesn't make sense to me. If she was from Poland, why wouldn't she just write Polish? And if she wasn't Polish and she was Slovak, why wouldn't she just write that instead of "Slavish?" I think it's possible she might've been Rusyn as well, so that may explain the "Slavish" thing, but it's extremely difficult to discern that because I literally cannot figure out where she was actually born.
So, I guess my question is, how do I untangle this? What is the most straight-forward way (short of a DNA test 'cause I don't have the money nor the trust in these companies to do that) of being as certain as I can about their ethnicities? I want to be able to talk about where my family came from-- especially since this is important to my grandmother and I want to be able to give her an answer-- but I don't want to claim to be something I'm not.
And as an aside, I'm aware that a lot of these areas were part of the Empire and switched hands between Austria and Hungary often, but my main issue is trying to figure out where my great-grandma was actually born because there's so many inconsistencies there that I don't even know where to start. Additionally, I have tried to look into my great-grandmother's parents since she came to the US with them, but it's just brick wall after brick wall and people who've been doing this for a lot longer than I have can't breakthrough it.
submitted by lunarwhispers98 to Ancestry [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 04:17 SerbianWarCrimes Do Gascons view themselves as Basques? (Apologies for not using Basque language)

Pardon my lack of knowledge of the situation, I am an American anthropologist and cannot find a good answer online. Do Gascons identify as Basque? From what i've read the endonym [Gascon] implies at one point in history the Gascons viewed themselves as Latin-speaking Basques, I am asking Basque and Gascon people this to hear what they think. I’m asking this question in the Gascon and Basque subreddit, as I’d like to hear ideas from both.
submitted by SerbianWarCrimes to basque [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 04:12 StoopSign Team America Vs Team Humanity

What the election and Palestine all boils down for me is whether I'm a "civic nationalist" or not. I believe Americans are indoctrinated with the ideology. The entire notion of civic engagement is meant to kettle radicals and activists and herd them into an acceptable level of discourse and being professional and judicious at all times. You protesters are at a 9 and I'm gonna need you at a 2.
People either fall for this, realize they gotta pay the piper, or a mixture of the 2. The liberal class is the most civic nationalist. I'm basically speaking of what's termed American Exceptionalism. Why does America never have to answer for its sins? Gen Z wants to know and so do we aging stagnant disgruntled Millenials.
I truly believe that Trump is the worse president for America as a functioning democracy. I think Trump purging the deep state would be hilarious and would also keep America from achieving its foreign policy objectives. Those objectives include bit are not limited to: Genocide. That's not even scratching the surface of our sanctions regime
At the same time I think Biden's unwavering support of a full scale genocide of Palestine as we speak. It's basically 1939 in Biden world and 1860 in Trumps world.
Am I American or am I human? I see no need for a country called Israel to exist in a racist form, and I definitely don't think America has the inherent right to exist. The US has a bigger 21st century body count than Israel or any country on earth. The evil empires of the Nazis and Soviets are done for. That just leaves the US empire and their gold medallion club members Israel. That's part of my civic disengagement.
The rest of the world will be better off out from under our thumb. Trump 2.0. Mecha Trump will be a bumpy ride for sure but probably full of a lot of laughs like his first term
If I vote it won't be for either and I hope theres protests at polling places.
submitted by StoopSign to WayOfTheBern [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 03:57 Long_Tie_1018 AITA for telling my niece how old she looks?

English is not my first language, so forgive any mistakes. My niece (who is like a daughter to me) and I are going on a roadtrip. She is going to medical school in New York and is moving in early because she got a good deal on the apartment.
I am staying with her for a few weeks to help her move in. I just recently moved to the United States and was excited to spend time with her.
We went to a store and she left something and we had to call back. The women on the phone said, “You came with your boyfriend yes?” She started laughing. She said “no, that’s my dad.”
I thought it was sweet she called me her dad. She hung up the phone and was shocked. She said I was so much older, how could they think that?
My niece is 23. I told her that everyone says I look around 25 even though I’m in my 40’s. She might not notice it because she sees me a lot but people say I look really young.
She said that was great and people tell her that she looks young too. She asked how old do you think I look?
I told her the truth. I said she has a face of someone 23, but besides that she is chubby and her body makes her look 30, maybe.
I just said it because in my country we assume that someone that is chubby is older. Usually, young people aren’t chubby where we are from, only older people. But this is America and a lot of people are fat.
I regretted that I said it immediately because she started crying. She pulled over and refused to drive any longer. I tried to tell her sorry, but she said I ruined her trip and to not talk to her anymore. I said she asked and I answered and she knows English is my 4th language. It could have been miscommunication. I’m not use to being around Americans. I explained that back home we don’t have fat people except for older people and that is why I said that.
She yelled at me to leave her alone. We’ve stopped at hotels and she has not spoken to me.
submitted by Long_Tie_1018 to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 03:49 KekExplorer How do the futuristic fitting rooms work?

The other day I went to an American Eagle in Columbus. It had a tablet in my dressing room that had the exact types and sizes of my clothes listed but I never scanned them or anything. The employees never checked my items. So I was just wondering, how does this work. How did they know? Google didn’t have any answers and I’ve been very curious
submitted by KekExplorer to americaneagle [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 03:49 KCHank Boomer doesn’t understand how Facebook works, calls me a scammer because of it.

Boomer doesn’t understand how Facebook works, calls me a scammer because of it.
I run consumer shopping events where I sell booth space to vendors to sell to consumers, think craft and Christmas shows. We do a lot of social media outreach to find vendors from our events. I work for one of the largest producers in North American doing this. Top notch marketing team and graphic designers. Our marketing team will create graphics we can share in vendor groups to find new vendors. Lots of our vendors are older in the boomer age group. Our policy is to always include our work email and phone number on all graphics, and we don’t take Venmo for our events.
A first happened to me this evening. I had made a post over the weekend in a vendor group, got a lot of traction. I get a notification tonight that someone had commented on my graphic and said “I turned you in a scammer!! Take it down now!” I look at the vendors Facebook page and she had posted my graphic earlier in the day asking if anyone had heard of the event. Then later posted again the same graphic and said “This now say contact (vendor name). This is a Scam!!!
I find the vendors number and call her right away trying to get to the bottom of what the heck is going on. Vendor claims she emailed me and it wasn’t a valid email address, it’s correct on the graphic. Vendor swears up and down that her name is now in front of my name on the lower right, so I ask her to text me the image which she does. Vendor is correct, her name is on the lower right, followed by my name and phone/emails. Vendor says that her son looked that the flyer and her name was there on the contact information. However I figure out that this vendor has clicked the image on her phone on her post, so of course her name is in the lower right corner because she posted it. I text here (images included) what happened, does’t respond. Try to call her and won’t answer now. Typical boomer, can’t be wrong.
submitted by KCHank to BoomersBeingFools [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 03:22 limegreenscrewdriver Bird flu

Bird flu
Shower thoughts: The only blurb you see about it is “it could kill 1 of 4 Americans.” 80 million people 25% is a lot of people. But why 25%? Why not 1/2 or 1 in 10. Or 1 in 20 Well there’s is an answer, about 28% of the world got the vaccine, 75% +- 5 here and there in some states and groups and races but generally 25% of the us population or close to it is fully vaccinated. They are targeting unvaccinated or vaccinated for this next one. Pics from cd and x
submitted by limegreenscrewdriver to conspiracy [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 03:12 TaranMatharu The web of clues in From

When solving a mystery, one has to make some assumptions if one wishes to go beyond a surface level solve attempt of From's mystery. Which effectively means, one must pick an answer to a clue one is fairly certain of, and use that as one might use a jigsaw piece to solve the next clue that connects to it.
For any interested, I share my opinion on what the key strands of clue clusters and the twisted threads therein that I believe need to be woven together into a narrative to form an origin story for Fromland and solve the show.
1. The first strand is historical figures from North American history (and the end of the War of the Roses), falling roughly on the dates on Tabitha's dream sequence. Some historical figures are given far more clues than others, suggesting they might later become characters on the show. In particular Caroline Dye's hoodoo magic, and Alma Hayes the strongwoman.
There are six threads in there as not every timeline will be explored in the series - the main ones are 1930s, 1880s, 1860s, 1770s, 1670s, and 1498.
1498 is by far the most prevalent and perhaps the easiest to start with. Most are from England and to a lesser extent, Italy/Venice, Scotland, Germany, Portugal, Spain, France, Burgundy, China, Iran, Iceland, Greenland/Newfoundland. It's also the best one to solve first, as the historical figures in the 1498 origin story are the archetypes that the historical figures in the other timelines mimic.
For example, I'm absolutely certain one is Richard Amerike - Sheriff of Bristol. There is a lawman/sheriff in every timeline - Boyd is the sheriff now.
Each new historical figure discovered in any timeline is a great puzzle piece. If you find out Emmett Kelly, the Hobo Clown is in the 1930s timeline, you can search for other "clowns" and discover Triboulet, the court jester in the 1498 origin story.
2. The second strand is the sequence of events in the origin story specifically. These clues are far more vague, and easier to explain what I mean by example.
Let's look at Kelly's head spiked to a tree with Boyd yanking it out instead of using the gun. The reasoning was: Kristi did not want Kelly to see or experience the gun, when Kelly is currently blind and the gun is a far better "experience" than the yanking. I contend this is quite a pointed clue that he's recreating a scene in the original timeline. In my opinion, a botched execution by a crossbow at a time where there were no guns to use.
There are threads within this strand. Two are practically strands of their own, with witch trial and torture methods and christmas / lent traditions from the countries of the various historical figures being the most prevalent. The traditions bit is a lot easier if you solve the origin story characters first, since you can then surmise which countries the traditions to look out for might come from.
3. The third strand is the mythology of the show. Ultimately, if one assumes North East Canada is where it all begins, you might make the leap it relates to the mythology related to that area. This has two main threads, the bogeyman, and the fairies. What I came to find were, there were clues pointing to practically every kind of bogeyman and fairy legend in that region. I was wondering if these were red herrings, or maybe it was all of them at once? It took me a long time to figure out what we're being asked to do here - but I figure there are 7 bogeymen and 4 fairy types the monsters and entity are mimicking, and a type of bogeyman and fairy that they really are.
4. Apotropaic magic - specific to the cunning folk of England. Witch's bottles and ladders, that sort of thing.
5. Medieval board and card games, as well as a few other adult medieval games, like stoolball. Main thread here is French tarot cards, but not their witchy meanings and connection to fortune telling, just the playing cards and what they look like. Other substantial threads involve Game of Goose and Pachisi.
submitted by TaranMatharu to FromTVShow [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 03:02 RoutineCranberry3622 Why do other countries wear Yankees hats?

I ask here instead of other subs for cool and intelligent answers. But they say baseball hats are an American thing but every time I’ve visited countries in Europe/asia/South America, I see people wearing Yankees caps all the time. Why do you suppose this is?
submitted by RoutineCranberry3622 to AmericaBad [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 02:54 memorablestories 28M - If you giggle you owe me a chat!

Hey y'all, thanks for being here, I want to thank my parents, my friends.. Oh, sorry, I dont know how to start writing those things, so I guess I should start from the beginning? Here i go:
It was a sunny day in 1996, when a sweet young lady had a contraction and... Oh gosh, sorry again. I will fast forward a bit.
Well, as the title says, I am 28, and I'm brazilian. Let me cut the chase and answer the top 3 questions I get all the time.
  1. Yes, we are forced to play soccer from an early age. You need to play at least 1 soccer game every week or else... oh boy, things get messy
  2. Yes, all South Americans learn how to dance at the age of 2, I may have missed a few classes, tho.
3 No, not every brazilian has a big booty, I know you weren't ready for that, I'll give you some minutes to process it, and then we can go on.
Ok, now a bit about me, what do I like? Great question, let's see, I love movies, specially thriller, some of my favorites are Shutter Island, final destination, the pursuit of Happiness, inception and a lot more, we can talk about movies for, like, 30 minutes then I will get bored and change the subject but you got the idea.
I love series too, especially comedy, Friends are my favorite ones, and Ross and Rachel shouldn't end up together. Do you think you can change my mind? Try it, I dare you!
I like to work out and stay active, probably because of all those years forced to play soccer at school, now my body needs it. I have a cute border collie too so if you read all this and thought "omg he is so boring, I can't stand anymore" then just bear with me a little longer and you can see Loki in all his glory once you pm me.
I like to go out with my friends, and play some games together, I own a small collection of boardgames so if you are into that we have something to talk about too, my favorites are single player rpgs but I love playing coop games as well.
If you want to get an idea of what I look like, I'm 5'10 (177cm), brown eyes, and hair, and we can exchange pictures at any time.
You read this far? OMG, ME TOO! Send me a chat request, and let's see how it goes. Just behave yourself cause I am legally allowed to handcuff you.
See you soon! :)
submitted by memorablestories to Needafriend [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 02:53 memorablestories [28M] If you giggle you owe me a chat!

Hey y'all, thanks for being here, I want to thank my parents, my friends.. Oh, sorry, I dont know how to start writing those things, so I guess I should start from the beginning? Here i go:
It was a sunny day in 1996, when a sweet young lady had a contraction and... Oh gosh, sorry again. I will fast forward a bit.
Well, as the title says, I am 28, and I'm brazilian. Let me cut the chase and answer the top 3 questions I get all the time.
  1. Yes, we are forced to play soccer from an early age. You need to play at least 1 soccer game every week or else... oh boy, things get messy
  2. Yes, all South Americans learn how to dance at the age of 2, I may have missed a few classes, tho.
3 No, not every brazilian has a big booty, I know you weren't ready for that, I'll give you some minutes to process it, and then we can go on.
Ok, now a bit about me, what do I like? Great question, let's see, I love movies, specially thriller, some of my favorites are Shutter Island, final destination, the pursuit of Happiness, inception and a lot more, we can talk about movies for, like, 30 minutes then I will get bored and change the subject but you got the idea.
I love series too, especially comedy, Friends are my favorite ones, and Ross and Rachel shouldn't end up together. Do you think you can change my mind? Try it, I dare you!
I like to work out and stay active, probably because of all those years forced to play soccer at school, now my body needs it. I have a cute border collie too so if you read all this and thought "omg he is so boring, I can't stand anymore" then just bear with me a little longer and you can see Loki in all his glory once you pm me.
I like to go out with my friends, and play some games together, I own a small collection of boardgames so if you are into that we have something to talk about too, my favorites are single player rpgs but I love playing coop games as well.
If you want to get an idea of what I look like, I'm 5'10 (177cm), brown eyes, and hair, and we can exchange pictures at any time.
You read this far? OMG, ME TOO! Send me a chat request, and let's see how it goes. Just behave yourself cause I am legally allowed to handcuff you.
See you soon! :)
submitted by memorablestories to MeetNewPeopleHere [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 02:43 NerdyOutdoors Exeter City Season 7: 3 Pressing Questions as Exeter Prepare for Season 2 in the Premier Leauge

Exeter City Season 7: 3 Pressing Questions as Exeter Prepare for Season 2 in the Premier Leauge
After Exeter City secured safety in their first-ever Premier League season, with four matches remaining, the fans' hearts, and the backroom staff's minds, all turned toward the upcoming season. Exeter's season was marked by thrilling highs (a 6-1 thrashing of West Ham, a convincing victory over Tottenham) and shocking lows (a 1-6 loss to LUTON TOWN of all teams, a pasting 1-5 by an ascendant Arsenal), but manager Andy Maher remained steady at the controls.
With the summer 2029 transfer window slammed shut and the new-look teams having played a few matches, we run the rule over the teams in the 2029-2030 Premier League. Up today, the south coast side Exeter City, the only fan-owned team in the Premier League. With the Supporter's Trust helping contribute to financial operations and the canny Julian Tagg still directing the football side of things, Exeter look to consolidate their precarious position and craft a long-term place in the top flight.
Exeter finished their season in a commendable 13th place, with an impressive attacking line that was able, sometimes, to overcome the worst defense outside of the relegation zone. Known usually for a solid backline, Exeter's players were generally exposed by the pace and attacking verve of the Premier League. Only Sonny Cox and the rest of the attack, who posted the league's 8th best scoring record, kept Exeter afloat.
https://preview.redd.it/1u8kinxnfa0d1.png?width=616&format=png&auto=webp&s=ae29e48269936f51392d1e89c08201b630a33d35
Cox, in partnership with assists co-leader Idrissa Camara, led the Premier League with a stunning 27 goal tally in 38 appearances, topping Chelsea's Nkunku by 3 goals.
As Exeter turn to the new season, we ask three pressing questions of the team and examine the answers to find out if Exeter can repeat the trick, or if their security in the top flight is merely an illusion.
Question 1: Will the defense improve?
Whether down to tactics or formation, or players themselves, Exeter's defense in the 2028-29 season was lacklustre at best. Many point to the relatively thrifty spend in 2028-29, with only Jordan Storey and Etienne Kinkoue coming through the door to bolster the ranks last season.
This season looks already off to a different start. While Exeter continue to parsimoniously clutch the purse strings, they sold some excess players and finally made a significant, record-smashing, splash in the transfer pool, this time bolstering the backline.
Exeter splashed £22.5m to sign Czech Republic international star Martin Vitik away from Salernita, who escaped relegation by just a few points in Serie A. Able to offer improved wages and a competitive environment, Exeter had clearly committed to improving the defense here.
https://preview.redd.it/h7kuk06rfa0d1.png?width=624&format=png&auto=webp&s=6404ef1fdc28f0f63a70fec072fd675b08da639b
"We saw a number of transfers out early in this window, where players had not quite fit in, or even where we decided, as much as we wanted to keep the man, we needed to fund improvements across the squad," said Tagg. "Last year we saw a net spend for the first time ever, and while we are very far from the spending limits imposed by the EFL, we need to make sure we balance the books. So this was a very involved, drawn out, patient process that we were only able to conclude in late August."
In keeping with Exeter's thrifty ways, they added another option to the midfield as well. "We really felt that if we could possess the ball better, maybe use David's skill set to break up plays more, and add another player there, we might see improvements across the whole defense," said Maher in an interview. "So we managed to convince Mateusz that we were the best option for him."
https://preview.redd.it/42qm1upufa0d1.png?width=621&format=png&auto=webp&s=aa1023b98c02609d700604365462115fed2e8a45
With Kowalczyk now roving the middle of the pitch, Exeter truly have competition at the central midfield position, and have the flexibility to move some of their talented pieces around the board. "Mateusz really freed up and gave us some interesting lineup choices, and you saw that in some of these early matches where we came out and surprised people," said Maher.
The new look for Exeter's base 4-2-3-1 looks like this, with Kowalczyk pushing forward into a CAM role, while Camara plays just slightly forward of Watson, who remains in a true defensive midfielder role. Hlynsson moves wide to the left, while Clark has the right touchline to himself. The new partnership of Storey and Vitik protects the center, while young starlet Maguire has impressed at right back, and former Exeter Academy man Ben Chrisene slots into the left wingback position.
Time will tell, but early results are promising. A rocky 3-2 win over Brighton was followed with a much more competent series of performances. Pundits are optimistic that Exeter can improve last season's defensive performance, and fans can only hope that the starting line avoids serious injury.
Question 2: Can Exeter keep their stars?
A smashing season from Cox, the silky smooth midfielder Camara, wide man Bobby Clark, the revelation of young fullback Rory Maguire-- these are the main men around whom Exeter has built its team. With Cox and Camara both having played with the squad since their League One days, there's an intuitive chemistry and connection built over hundred and thousands of hours on the training ground. Meanwhile. Clark has impressed on the wing, as the former central midfielder enjoys the space to threaten opposing fullbacks with his craft.
"We had one major bid for Sonny [Cox]," revealed Tagg recently, "but it was miles still from our valuation, and this is about more than just money anyway; Sonny has told us he will stay with us as long as he can, as long as our trajectory for success matches his. We go where Sonny takes us." The bid, which remains undisclosed, was regarded by some as an attempt to pry away a future world-class leader, at a cut-rate price. One indignant fan noted, "Just because we're Exeter and a small club doesn't mean they can offer rubbish fees." With goal scoring on par with elite teams like Chelsea, some were surprised by the rumors of the fee offer. Still, a handful of commentators, looking at Exeter's profit margins and football operations, noted that Exeter take a risk in declining a major fee--even a low offer. "£40, 50, 60 million? That would be huge for Exeter to take in, and then to reinvest across multiple positions of the squad," one said.
"What good is that reinvestment if you can't score in the Prem," replied Gibbons in her analysis of Exeter's roster. "Cox proved last season he could score here, that's invaluable to the team. We've seen too many failed major purchases-- even Exeter signed a player who was a bust at this level."
Exeter did lose a handful of significant players in the transfer window. Published estimates from football bloggers show that Exeter currently enjoy a small profit on sales, although this is subject to official confirmation.
Much of Exeter's reputed profit came from three sales. Moving on from failed striker Erik Botheim, Exeter unload the player and his contract to Bristol City for £9.9m. Kinkoue, who never really broke through into the first team with any consistency, accepted terms with Middlesbrough.
But the shock move was relegated Crystal Palace, desperate to shore up its bid for immediate promotion, buying Ngoma for £17.1m. The promising American winger showed great potential last season and was 2nd in assists for Exeter. His touch and crossing acumen helped Exeter through a challenging spring season and some thing that his departure is a significant dent in Exeter's futures.
https://preview.redd.it/u3dtrri3ga0d1.png?width=1256&format=png&auto=webp&s=5ade1c2f9d7f11b2f808252150e630f9fb2791dd
Ultimately, Exeter made few moves to bring in players, counting on a smaller number of hopefully shrewd choices to lead the way. As Gibbons notes, "There was some roster bloat last season; even with many players out on loan, Exeter carried more players than they could really find time for. This was a smart offseason to make a profit on academy graduates, while still identifying the core players who will help the team.
The season looks promising, with star man Cox already notching 4 goals in 6 appearances, while Camara and Clark both have tallied 2 goals and 1 assist each.
Gyokeres hasn't lost much of step, with 2 assists and a goal to his name.
Meanwhile, young star in the making Rory Maguire continues his run of excellent form. The young fullback had a bad day at the Carabao Cup, but has put in stellar shifts in the Premier League, and is quickly becoming one of Exeter's top choices in the back line. With his work, Exeter already have two clean sheets in the league.
https://preview.redd.it/h3drn3b6ga0d1.png?width=625&format=png&auto=webp&s=bef145182381d710da2ac09c87b4f4f16df2084d
A new star is rising in the defense also, with another academy product impressing in duty. Sebastian Benson, another 20-year-old defender, has been earning minutes in the starting XI and as one of the first off the bench. The centre-back is explosive in short areas and a dominating aerial talent to win headers away from even the fiercest attackers.
https://preview.redd.it/xgmf1mrdga0d1.png?width=830&format=png&auto=webp&s=6516c3628a14539f245f6611c130e5bc3aed8936
Question 3: What tactics will Exeter adopt to maximize their players?
With Gyokeres and Cox both on the field, Exeter found themselves in a surprising bind: The two forwards would either force Exeter into something like a 4-4-2, and thus push either defensive midfielder Medon Berisha or attacking midfielder Kristian Hlynsson to the substitute's bench, OR, Exeter could drop into a 5-man back line, and sacrifice the talented winger Bobby Clark to the exigencies of the formation.
Exeter usually chose the 4-4-2, and the gamble SOMETIMES worked in Exeter's favor. Analyst Beth Gibbons explains: "When Gyokeres is on the pitch with Cox, this is a dangerous and pacey attack. Gyokeres has proven adept at both holdup play where he links Cox to the midfield, and at running onto balls from the wings or from Camara, who's incredibly talented as a passer. But if Camara and [midfielder David] Watson get forward, there's nothing in front of that back four to protect against the counter, and Exeter were exposed frequently there.
But if Watson stays back to shield that line, or if Maguire doesn't track forward, Exeter were too one-dimensional, and really strong defenses absolutely stymied the attack.
Exeter have adopted a more flexible approach this year, including a surprise 5-4-1 that absolutely gobsmacked Manchester City in the early running this season.
Gibbons on the new look: "This was a real surprise, as it put Camara deeper than usual. But it was incredibly effective as it provided two defenders to cover Haaland, and freed the wing backs to come inside to help against the centre-mids, or to cover those wide wingers. Maguire's work against Foden was absolutely stellar, as he stymied the England international all match."
The lineup for the shock win over Man City
Exeter put on a defensive clinic against the champions, winning 2-0 in style, with a Cox brace to lead the team. Camara was incisive as usual, but the real hero was Watson in the middle to cut off the Manchester transition, and Maguire wide, who posted 6 successful tackles against Foden and won almost every battle on that side.
Exeter shifted onto the attack for its match against Brighton and revealed a swashbuckling 4-3-3 with a fascinating double-pivot in the midfield. "The one defensive midfielder was often over-run," said Maher in a podcast interview after the match. "So we took the usual midfield triangle and inverted it, giving us two men to break up attacks. Idrissa's so good at launching after an interception or a tackle, so we let him sit deep and orchestrate, but he has free roam of that side of the pitch, to work into space more or push forward. So he and Matty [Kowalczyk] act almost like 2 attacking mids when we had the ball, but then he comes back to defense really quickly."
Wide, Gyokeres and Clark pushed up field and menaced the fullbacks. Brighton struggled with this positioning and gave up goals to both of the wide men, while Cox facilitated with an assist and a number of key passes.
The positional flexibility has been impressive from the Grecians, and Exeter now sit 5th in the table after six matches. The most impressive stretch has come in September, with matches against Manchester City, Tottenham, and Arsenal. Most fans would have been ecstatic to come away with one draw in those 3 matches, and maybe add one point to the total from those three. Instead, Exeter took points in every one of the matches, including the clean sheets against Manchester City and Arsenal.
Recent Results
"If you told us, draws against two teams there, any fan would have taken it, right?" said Maher in the post-game press conference after the Arsenal match. "A clean sheet against Arsenal? Absolutely, you take that. But the fans have been excellent in their support, and the lads stepped up and executed against Manchester, and all of a sudden, they have this confidence to go out like they did. We fell behind against Tottenham but got the 82nd-minute equalizer because they never quit, they feel like they can go against any team."
With the 5-game unbeaten streak, Exeter have laid down a marker that they wager they'll improve on last season's finish, and they're a danger to take points from any of the usual Big Six. "We're not scared," said Idrissa Camara. "We're hungry. Everyone else should be scared."
The Verdict:
Exeter look to have improved the defense and kept the most important cogs in the attack, although there are rumors that some elite Champions League sides are eying up winger Clark. The lineups will be a man-management challenge for the coaching staff, as there are simply a few too many great midfielders to balance out--someone has to drop to the substitute's bench. If Maher and the staff can manage playing time and player expectations, this will be an exciting team to watch this season. Our prediction: 10th place.
Player notes: PC, mods include gameplay mods (Anth James), Career Realism Mod (PaulV) and homemade loan/transfecontract mods to improve free agency.
Full ruleset can be found here. Sheet 1 details general rules and principles; subsequent sheets track transfers and finances.
Finances are paramount for a small club. The first season in the Prem, we operated with a net spend in the transfer window, to bring in important players that bolster the squad. Last season was the first season (out of 6) to see this spending. Maybe I'll do a finances post soon because I find that stuff fascinating.
Randomizer for transfers; transfer targets are limited to +1 over position average, with 1 player per year allowed to be significantly beyond that. This season, we targeted a CB to improve the defense and lucked into the signing of Vitik. He was actually our 3rd choice-- there was a top-notch free agent but we lost him to Chelsea and thus we had to wait for some player sales before we could afford a move.
For transferring players at or below the team average, I use a very simple weighted randomizer that's built into my google sheets. For the players that are +2 or more beyond the team average, I use https://5ungc6-joseph-boyd.shinyapps.io/FifaDiceRoll/ crafted by another excellent member of this subreddit. It changes the probability of signings depending on how far above the average your intended signing is.
If you read this far, you're fabulous, good-looking, and intellectually gifted. Happy gaming!
submitted by NerdyOutdoors to seriousfifacareers [link] [comments]


http://swiebodzin.info