Throat hurts when i swallow feels like its closing

I've always found it a little weird/annoying that Razer offers translucent keycap additions that look just completely and utterly amazing, but only in US/UK layouts when there are many other keyboard layouts in the world so I'm wondering if we're ever gonna get upgrade sets in those languages, aswell or if it's forever gonna be nothing but english? I know for a fact that it's not a case of Razer just not having any products with layouts in other languages, I'm currently writing on a Blackwidow V4 Pro with a Swedish/Scandinavian layout, so it doesn't feel like it'd be that outrageous a move on the companys part to make keycap sets in other languages when they've already got keyboards in those languages
I hope this doesn't break rule 7, I realise it's basically "asking about availability" but I feel like it's not quite the same as asking something like "when's product A coming to X country" or something like that but if the mods feel like it's close enough then I apologize and am fine with the post getting removed, but I'd still love an answer nontheless

I'll make it quick.. but growing up, and into adulthood I've always been called a hybrid of different things - most commonly "weird"
how do I respond when someone calls me weird? I never know how - I understand the undertone of that can sometimes be mean so I try to "own" it by saying "thank you" or "I know" or something... but I feel like I'm missing a better way to respond and not seem hurt?

It is not as bad as it sounds. My mom and I(16f) had an argument about my studies and it is my fault. I know I was being wrong when the fight started and she started calling me names due to which I felt very hurt and I started shouting and was being rude to her. (I know shouldn't have been rude to her, but I have anger issues just like my dad and I'm working on it). Anyways she starts hitting me. She threw to the floor and was hitting me when I got up and put my hands to the front to defend myself and stop her from hitting me. I think in the process of defending myself, I might have pushed her while crying so she doesn't hit me and she thinks I hit her and feels sad. It breaks my heart to her sad and think I HIT her. Aitah?

First off, this is just fantasy, and in fact was written for someone else. If you don't enjoy incest or young sex, please read something else. If you have an idea you'd like to have turned into a story let me know...travisbot@yahoo.com ******************************************************* It was a typical Saturday morning and I was lying in bed with my wife. The sun was starting to come up and I could hear birds chirping outside. I looked over and saw her sleeping peacefully, and I couldn't help but think out the wonderful night of lovemaking we had last night. Reaching under the covers I gave her ass a gentle squeeze, both of us having slept naked as usual. I turned my head as I heard the sound of our 13 year old daughter Emma gently opening our door. She looked at me, seeing my open eyes, Daddy, can I come in the bed with you? I nodded gently as it wasn't unusual for her to join us on a weekend morning. We weren't shy about nudity in our family, and she knew that her Mommy and I normally slept with no clothes on. She would crawl on top of the sheets and cuddle with us until we all got up. I watched Emma walk over in her thin silky pink nightgown and couldn't help but think a little bit about the white cotton panties I knew she was wearing when she went to bed. At 5'2 she was almost as tall as her mother, but was thin as a reed. I looked at her tiny body, still smooth and hairless and just barely beginning to show any signs of womanhood. As she walked up the bed she started to pull the covers back but I stopped her. Honey, Daddy's not wearing any PJs today. It's okay Daddy. I've seen you naked in the shower. Is it okay if I get in? I looked over at my wife. I knew that growing up she was very close with her family. Growing up with parents that were very much hippies I knew that she was way more open about her sexuality with our daughter than most, but I still felt weird about her being in bed with us in just her nighty and panties when we were naked. Please Daddy. Mommy won't mind I know. I looked at those precious little eyes and nodded my head. I did my best to hide my morning erection from her, rolling a little to hide it in the bed. As she climbed into bed I felt my wife roll over. She smiled at Emma and gave her a little wink, Good morning Honey. I looked at them both, wondering what that was about, but knowing that they shared so much it wasn't a surprise that I was left out. As rolled over on my back to give my wife a little kiss, I felt Emma start to crawl up on top of me. I started to stop her, not wanting her to feel my erect cock. My wife leaned over, whispering in my ear, let her baby, it's fine. I still felt a little weird about it, but who was I to argue with these 2 ladies. I looked at my wife, still confused, as I felt Emma's tiny 5'2 and 90lb body lay on top of me. I could feel her warmth against me, my hardness pressed between us. In spite of my attempts at thinking about baseball and my Grandma, feeling her tiny body, with nothing but a thin silky nightgown and little white cotton panties was doing nothing to make my hard on go away. I was worried that Emma, or my wife, was going to be concerned about that. I gasped as Emma squirmed on top of me, her nighty starting to slip up a little bit. I felt my wife snuggle close to us, her body pressed against me as she started whispering in my ear. I couldn't even begin to believe what she was telling me. She told me that when she was just a little younger than Emma she began to explore her sexuality. Her Mother had embraced her young body, taking her into her bed, teaching her about her body, masturbating, how to please each other and a man. Her mother finally encouraging her to have her daddy be her first lover. I turned, looking at my wife...I couldn't believe it...her first lover was her Dad? As my wife continued to tell me this I felt Emma gently rocking her hips on me. As she was rubbing on my now throbbing cock I felt my wife gently assisting in easing her nightgown up. I knew it would only be a few more seconds before there was nothing but her tiny white panties separating her hairless virgin pussy from my rock hard cock. My wife continued to explain that Emma was like she was. At her age there was no stopping her budding sexuality. She was going to experiment, and did we as parents want our child's first sexual experiences to be with some clueless teenager? Someone who might not be gentle and kind, not be a good teacher, to scar her for life? Wasn't it better to have it be safe and with someone trustable who could be a gentle teacher? I couldn't believe what was happening; my sweet 13 year old girl was rubbing her body on me and my wife was trying to convince me that I should be the one to take her virginity? This couldn't be happening. I felt Emma rubbing against me, my wife slipping her nighty up. I felt her hips rubbing against me, but instead of feeling her panties, I felt her tiny bald pussy lips rubbing on my cock. I moaned slightly as her copious pussy juices began coating my cock. I looked over at my wife, I can't do this...I can't take her virginity. Emma rocked her hips and then slid up a little to whisper in my ear, please Daddy. I want you to be the one. I love you, I trust you, I know you will make it special. Mommy told me how good her Daddy was and I want that with you. With that, Emma sat up on me, pressing her tiny slit against my cock and slipped the nightgown over her head. I looked at her thin young body, my cock now throbbing pressed against her little virgin cunt. She looked at my wife who gave her a nod. With that she crawled up my body, straddling my face, pressing her hairless virgin pussy against my mouth. I could smell her sweet aroma, feel the heat of her young pussy. I gently licked her outer lips, spreading them with my tongue. I began to lick her inner labia, noticing how her inner stuck out from her little slit just like her mother. As I twirled my tongue around her clit I heard her moan out, oh yes Daddy. Daddy! DADDY! Just as I was about to press my tongue into her tiny virgin hole I felt my wife pick up her tiny frame and turn her around. She was still sitting on my face, but now facing my cock, giving me the perfect view of her tiny hairless pussy and puckered brown asshole. I began licking her lips again as I felt my wife's mouth on my cock. I moaned into Emma's pussy and I felt my wife begin to lick last night's sex from my cock. I felt Emma lean down and suddenly there were 2 mouths on my cock. Oh Daddy you taste so good. Mommy told me you would. I think you taste even better than Mommy. I gasped as her words sunk in...this isn't the first time they have been together. I pondered this as I spread her ass cheeks, flicking my tongue over her tiny asshole. She pushed back a little, and from her reaction I realized her and Mommy must have talked about that too. I licked her pussy for all it was worth, but 2 mouths on my cock was soon going to be more than I could handle. Girls, please don't stop, I'm going to cum soon. Much to my dismay, before the words were even out of my mouth both of them had stopped. Daddy, don't cum yet. I want you to take my virginity and cum inside me. Please, please! My wife wasn't even waiting for a response, she knew full well I wouldn't be able to resist. Emma crawled down to straddle me again, rubbing her soaking wet pussy on my cock. I moaned, even at 13 she was producing lots of pussy juice just like her Mommy. I couldn't help but wonder if this is exactly how my wife was at 13. The thought made me even hornier. She helped Emma position herself over my cock, taking my cock in her hand and guiding it to Emma's tiny hole. I looked at her hairless pussy lips, just starting to spread as my throbbing mushroom head was pushing them apart. I looked at my wife and child, seeing how much they looked alike. Realizing what a sexy young woman Emma had become. Emma looked at her Mommy who just said, whenever you are ready baby. This is what you wanted. I gasped as I felt her tiny pussy slide down my cock just a tiny bit, the head pushing into her lips, but still not penetrating her. I couldn't believe how tight she was. Even with all that pussy juice it was hard to get inside her. I felt her pressing down harder, both of us moaning as my cock slipped into her tiny tight pussy. I watched as about an inch of my cock entered her, Emma pausing to adjust to my cock inside her. She pulled up just a little until my cock was almost out of her, then slipping down and taking a little more inside her. It was all I could do to stop from thrusting my hips up and forcing my cock in to her tiny tight little hole. I looked up to see my wife watching as her baby got fucked by my swollen cock. She had 2 fingers in her pussy and was furiously masturbating her pussy as she watched. Emma began bobbing up and down now, taking a little more of my cock with each thrust. She had about 2/3rd of my cock inside her and with one hard downward thrust she took my entire cock in her. She moaned as she did so, stopping again to adjust to my size inside her. I just moaned, her pussy was so tight around my throbbing cock I thought I might break her in half. I leaned up to lick Emma's tiny nipples, running my tongue around them, sucking the tiny barely formed nubs into my mouth. She moaned and started to slide up and down a little more on my hard cock, eventually taking me fully inside her with each thrust. I watched, amazed that her wisp thin 90 lb body could possibly take my cock. She was so tiny I thought I would see my cock making her swell as I filled her. She was moaning nonstop now, and my wife came over and started licking her nipples. I couldn't believe how tight she was, and I knew that I couldn't be able to last very long, but I figured she could only take so much of my thick cock in her the first time. As my wife began licking her nipples Emma's moaning increased substantially. I felt her pussy squeezing me tighter, her pussy so tight now it was almost painful. I pulled Emma down on top of me, bringing her mouth to mine I began to gently kiss her. She kisses me back, our tongues poking out just a little bit to touch each other. Emma whispered in my ear, oh thank you Daddy. You feel so good in me. It's so much better than Mommy's dildos. I felt my wife move to the bed behind us and felt her hand begin rubbing my balls. She leaned down and gently spread Emma's ass cheeks, leaning in and rubbing her tongue over Emma's asshole. Emma was moaning into my mouth as we were kissing, bouncing her ass faster now on my cock. I know how much my wife loves eating ass, so I knew that she much be licking and sucking her rosebud, thrusting her tongue into Emma's tight little asshole. I felt Emma's pace increase, and her pussy was pulsating on me. Her tiny bald pussy was so tight and my cock was throbbing inside her. She pulled back from my mouth screaming out YES DADDY, OH, Oh, DAAADDDDY and with that I felt her clamp down on my cock and her tiny 13 yr old pussy began to cum all over me. Please cum in me Daddy. I want to feel your cum in me like Mommy does. Please Daddy! CUM IN ME NOW! That was all I could take and I moaned, gave her one good hard thrust and my hot seed erupted into my daughter's recently virgin pussy. I moaned as squirt after squirt shot in to her hot velvety cunt. I could feel my cum running out of her already, her hole just not big enough to accommodate my cock and a huge load of cum. I felt Emma's tiny pussy squeezing me as I was cumming, and suddenly she let out a scream and her pussy flooded me with juices. It was so much I thought at first she was pissing on me, but then realized it was just a huge squirt. She moaning out, pushing my wife's face away from her asshole and collapsing onto me. Thank you Daddy. That was amazing. I'm so glad you got to be my first. With that she laid her head on my chest and sighed, my softening cock still in her tiny cum filled pussy. My wife laid next to us, smiling at me and nuzzling my neck. I wasn't sure you'd be up to this, but I'm glad that you were. She'll remember this for the rest of her life. I know I sure remembered all the things my parents taught me. I looked at her, still amazed at all I had learned today. My wife gave Emma a little pat and said, Emma darling, it's cleanup time. With that Emma rolled over on her back and my wife squatted he Pussy over Emma's face in a 69. With a familiarity that told me this wasn't their first time they began to lick each other. Emma would rock her hips and squeeze to get as much of my cum out of her so that my wife could lick her clean. Emma did her part licking my wife, sucking her clit in her mouth pulling her hips down to dart her tiny tongue over her puckered asshole. My wife was attacking Emma's tiny pussy when Emma started shaking with yet another orgasm. I could hear her moaning into my wife's pussy. As her orgasm passed she rolled my wife off her, time to clean up Daddy now. They both came over and started licking my half hard cock. Their 2 wonderful tongues on my cock and balls had the blood beginning to return to my partially flaccid member. Emma came up and whispered in my ear, you have to get it hard again Daddy because Mommy needs to get fucked hard. I want to be able to taste your cum in Mommy next. I hope you don't mind if I 69 Mommy while you fuck her doggy style because I really want to learn! It was all I could do to smiled and nod, since at that point most of my blood was in my dick. I just looked at my sweet little Emma as she crawled under her Mommy, and then looked and my fabulous wife with her ass in the air...this promised to be a great few years. Read more

Me and her have met on a chat app exactly 2 months ago and started casually talking. For clarification, neither of us were on that app to look for a fling or something sexual. We both are from different countries, with me being belgian and her being latvian. I currently live in Belgium while she just recently (three weeks ago) moved to Portugal to work there for 6 months with an open future. We have never met before in person due to those circumstances.
We basically talked day in and day out, with both of us mostly replying within seconds, no matter what time of the day. Got to know each other and although we are super different, we both got along good and after 2-3 weeks from starting to talk, moved to WhatsApp and exchanged any social media.
3 weeks after nonstop talking, she told me that she got attached to me and cannot deny that she has an emotional bond to me, although she tells herself not to have it for many reasons like for example meeting in person and it not working out. She said that she obviously likes me and always wanted to get to know me. She opened up about almost anything and said that I am the person that knows the most about her.
Around that time, i caught feelings for her. I told her that I like her too and that i open up for her as well, letting her know about myself in detail as well as my past. Those feelings of mine just became more and more and by this day im typing it, just became so much, that i constantly think about her and idk if a part of me already loves her although the situation with distance and all. She also said that she doesn’t want ldr (long distance relationship) because of bad experiences in the past and because she needs that person she loves around her often. We often talked about it and i confessed to her that i like her but she doesn’t buy it and always thinks im just trying to use her like all her previous boyfriends did. 3 weeks ago, she told me that she forced herself to unlike me and that she wants to keep things at friendly levels and that really hurt me. I tried to force myself to unlike her but I couldnt, she is constantly on my mind and all I want is her. She always mentioned that she does not do hookups/flings with anyone and is not interested in falling for love right now with anyone but not with me before we met and see if we get along.
Now here comes the important part in which i need help please.
This friday night, she went out with a new girl she made friends with to go party. Usually she even texts back when partying or being drunk/high but this time, she didn’t reply in the middle of the night although having read my last message. I immediately sensed something was not right and i got super worried, because i know that she isn’t in a mentally right state currently and occasionally takes drugs due to it and i just knew something was off. I didn’t double text her because I did not want to be annoying but constantly, really every 2 minutes, checked if she did text me or was active elsewhere on social media, because i care so much about her and got so worried something bad happened. She eventually texted back on saturday night around 10 pm, so basically after more than a whole day and i was really sad about this and replied somewhere past midnight, which again she just read but didn’t answer, probably went to sleep because she texted me Sunday morning back, only to tell me that she is in a comedown from drugs and has had a hookup with a guy she met in the club. At that moment, my heart break. I started to shake and cry, telling her of my pain right now and how much it hurts. She always said (and i believe her) that she never has hooked ups or anything like that and that she cannot afford to catch feelings currently because she has to focus on her work and is scared to relapse due to it. She said while sleeping with him, she thought about me and that it felt weird. She thinks about me in general throughout the day, she said. She didn’t even want to have sex but that guy was her type and she liked him at first and he kinda insisted on it. I told her that we have to stop talking because im just broken and just knowing that while i was laying in bed, checking my phone every single minute, she was spending time with someone she just met at the club and got closer to him, when that is actually all i ever wanted. Be close to her, see her in person, take care of her. I only want her. She said he texted her but she didnt answer because she doesnt care, but i think (allegedly, not 100% sure its him) they now, after i told her we need to stop talking, followed each other on insta (i know im dumb for checking it). She always said she never wants to lose me and it didnt seem like she wanted to stop talking and just followed my decisionbut im just heartbroken. I cant eat, i cant sleep, i cant stop thinking about her and im so fucking sad.
Please i need advice on this. How should i continue? I dont want to lose her. Sorry for grammar errors.

Hello, I’m new to this and don’t mean to say anything offensive, so I’ll try to be straight to the point.
I (26M) recently had a tough conversation with a close friend of mine (25F) of 5 years that I have a hard time picking up social nuances. Like I often don’t know how people feel unless they’re straightforward and generally take a person’s word for things which gets me into trouble every now and again. I thought that it was just a “guy stereotype”. But looking back now, I used to get into trouble a lot for being odd/not having a conventional train of thought as a kid. Teachers tried putting me in remedial classes but I excelled in math and sciences so I got out of it. Even to this day when I speak it’s hard to articulate my thoughts in a way that people understand unless they are willing to be patient with me which can be frustrating.
When I was in my second year of undergrad, I would have classmates make joking comments that they thought I was on the spectrum based on how I spoke and behaved. I wrote it off because I thought they were being jerks. What I lacked in communication skills I excelled in math and sciences then still. Now I just finished the second year of a 4 year graduate program in a fairly good standing compared to my peers.
Last February, a cousin of mine (24F) made an unprompted comment that she “always suspected I was on the spectrum”. Also, in a completely different conversation, last month my dad shared with me that he has a brother who is on the spectrum. Like he has had a hard time but was really good at fixing things (oddly enough growing up I was the fixer in my family).
I know that I can be quirky, have been said to be very particular about things, and a tad bit difficult to communicate with at times even with family, but who isn’t? In the past, I’ve tried to people please to make up for my quirks so that I could fit in better, but that’s not sustainable with my self esteem where I am in life anymore.
I didn’t want to believe it because of the stigma that comes with it. I went on this and other subreddits that led me to free online tests. I took it to disprove these assumptions and every time I passed with flying colors. Here are a few of my results below:
RAADS-R Minimum “on the spectrum” score: 65 “Really on the spectrum” score: 160 Maximum possible score: 240 My score: 174
RAADS-14 Minimum “on the spectrum” score: 14 Maximum possible score: 42 My score: 33
Adult Autism Test Results “Based on your results, there's a strong probability that you are autistic” Maximum possible score: 30 My score: 22
AQ Average for “Normal” males: 17.6 Average for males “on the spectrum”: 35.1 My score: 40
I’ve been trying to see a Psychologist to give me an official test bust so far the docs in my city either do not take my insurance or are at maximum patient volume. Still am actively reaching out in hopes I get some clarity.
Where do y’all recommend I go from here?

Stayed with a friend for a small trip. Packed my own food, my own dishes, my own everything because I’m super sensitive and was already feeling bleh.
We’re eating lunch and they take out a bag of vital wheat gluten and set it right in front of my opened containers of food. This was not malicious, just like a look what I have. The bag has been opened so as flour does when you move a bag of it around, a puff of it went in the air, above my food. I grabbed my food right away and moved it to the other side of the counter. And just ate it. Because it’s what I brought and we were running late and I didn’t see any go in so Im just like hope Im fine. And I didn’t say anything, just Im gonna get away from that.
Well 48 hours later, home now, and Im feeling so sick, got insomnia, back hurts, insides feel like the Sahara desert. Just crossing my fingers I don't get that weird UTI like feeling because somehow that is even worse than everything else.
Last time I felt this sick was when I was gluten free but didn’t know I had celiac yet and tested my reaction by eating a piece of bread. Also my barely used expensive gluten free certified jar of mayo is going in the trash. :(

my boyfriend and i have been together for five months and i think we both have issues. to start with, he admitted to having anger issues early on in our relationship and i told him that is completely fine with me. but he doesn’t have any diagnoses other than ADHD
he insists on tracking my location and got mad when it was off. i finally told him if he’s not going to share his i’m not going to share mine so i shut mine off. he accused me of being crabby. which i was, and i feel bad about it now.
there have been a few instances where my boyfriend will have to wait, usually in a restaurant, and he becomes visibly angry, saying he’s about to start yelling and just becomes pretty hostile to workers.
the other day we were at dominos and he got so annoyed with them not finding his pizza in the oven that he walked past the counter into the kitchen to get it himself
he also consistently says i don’t love him, asks what if i realize i don’t love him, insinuates i may have cheated on my past boyfriend. like i’ll say “i love you so much” and he will say “no” or “no you don’t”. one time he told me he was convinced i would never talk to him one day cause i didn’t reply til 12 pm and he threatened to do bad shit to me if i actually permanently ghosted him like that one day
he can also be a bit physically aggressive testing the waters by grabbing me by the arm kind of hard etc. not to a point where it hurts bad tho.
he also consistently violates my boundaries. i’ve told him im not ok in the slightest with him drunk driving with friends or starting physical fights in bars anymore. and idk about the fight thing cause he says he’s never lost a fight so i guess i wouldn’t notice if he wasn’t injured. but i do know he and his friends keep drunk driving. they’re from the rural areas where it’s apparently acceptable. so they think i’m overdramatic. i’m not trying to control him with that part just want him to be safe and not endanger others.
he also kinda bullies me sometimes. he knows i love animals and bugs so he will make a point to stomp on every ant hill he sees, or talk about how when we live together he refuses to get a humane rat trap he will either kick and kill them or he will use a regular trap. he also told me the other day he almost shot a feral cat. like he says these things to upset me i feel like.
when we first met i am convinced he may have love bombed me. he was talking about marriage, me moving in with him for free, taking me on vacation, etc. within the first 48 hours of meeting. DREAM GUY for a borderline like me.
i can also be manipulative and toxic in my opinion. if he really upsets me, which hasn’t happened in quite a while since he’s been kinda better, i used to block him all day because i would get too angry or stressed out by him. i never do it anymore but i will keep my texts short or just kinda mimic his emotionless texts when i am upset.
i feel horrible about this especially, but one day he told me if i wasn’t going to finish the drinks he buys me he shouldn’t buy me any at all and i should buy my own. and he said sorry for trying to help me have a good time cause he was pressuring me to chug this very strong drink that i didn’t want. i had been so mentally broken down that week that i started sobbing and asking why he’s so mean to me and i told him to pack his things and get out. for once in this relationship he seemed sad and said let’s just talk. literally looking back i feel SO horrible about that entire situation.
i also talk badly about him to my friends and family in a rant because i feel hurt or mistreated by him so now none of them like him or approve of our relationship. which i seriously regret. i wish i had kept all of this to myself. like why the fuck am i doing this? instead of talking to him. maybe it’s because he just gets defensive and shuts down when criticized. which i totally get. but i just feel i can’t talk to him about issues i have with him.
i can also be very passive aggressive, this one time i drew a comic depicting the times he has hurt my feelings and i drew myself crying and stuff and it didn’t say anything mean just depicted each scenario as it happened, like him pressuring me to get on BC or do shit sexually i didn’t want to do. i crumpled it up on my desk knowing hes nosy and would uncrumple and read it. i just feel i cant talk about this shit with him sometimes
i also have tried reprogramming his mind by playing subliminal messages at night to make him a better boyfriend and help convince him that his actions in the past have been wrong. basically with messages telling him he needs to be nicer and stuff and love me
i also practice mild witchcraft and have tried casting love spells when he was two hours away. maybe it’s more so manifesting us being together forever, as i will meditate with a rose quartz crystal ball and imagine us growing old together and being happy together.
i feel like shit right now. i know im more in the wrong than he is. i just can’t stop myself from being toxic no matter how hard i try i become convinced he is going to abandon me so i push him away first then regret it later.
neither of us is perfect but we do truly love each other. how do we make things work.

I hope everyone had an amazing weekend. Mine was relaxing, I decided to not do any writing over it and instead I caught up on some games.
Anyway, with this chapter posted, the story will be over 150,000 words!
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Felix took a step back in shock. This was not how it was all supposed to go…
His eyes flicked over to Watcher, who had slumped to his knees. The kobold was muttering something.
“Should we stop them?!” Eri asked in near panic.
“I–” He stopped, something was nudging him from his soul.
Felix…
Fea, what is happening?!
A hand brushed across his face.
Startled by the sensation, he shook his head. What–
His body tensed, his thoughts froze. A pulse from deep within reverberated and echoed throughout his body. With it, Fea’s calming voice spoke to him.
Calm yourself…
As the words registered within his mind, another pulse was sent out. This time, a wave of serenity followed. It was like he was back in her room, resting his head upon her lap…
His body relaxed while his mind thawed. Time seemed to almost slow for him, as he began to unwind from the stress. He did not want it to end…
In his blissful state, the realization became clear. He would have another part to play soon. So very, very soon…
“Eri, when I tell you, activate the runes.” His voice was smooth and calm.
“What?”
“Trust me, I will handle what will happen next.” He had no way to truly express what he meant. It was a feeling, a sensation. He was being guided.
Just like Watcher…
“What do you mean–”
Felix stopped her. “Please, trust me?” He didn’t wait for a response and instead brought all his focus on the den. The sound of the world fading from him, even from his bond…
Silence engulfed him.
Fea…
Felix…
“Guide me–”
A scream bellowed from the den. It was time.
Without a moment of hesitation, he dove in. He came upon a disturbing scene. Yedril was laying on the floor, convulsing. His sister was next to him trying to shake him awake.
“Lorem, grab her and pull her out.”
The large elf opened his mouth but stopped, he saw the seriousness within Felix’s expression. He acted.
Lorem rushed over and grabbed hold of Solanna, and quickly pulled her away. All the while, his captive fought, kicking and screaming. Still, the elf had no trouble.
Felix looked over to a shivering Noria who remained. “Go, Noria. I will handle this.”
She broke from her stupor and gave him a shaky nod. A second later, he was alone with Yedril.
“Activate them!” he called out, already kneeling down. Mana began flooding the room as he inspected the sickly elf.
Even without his mana sight, it was obvious what happened. Yedril was completely drained of mana. Worse still, his heart rate was slowing and his breathing ragged. The young elf was dying.
Felix took a deep breath, latching onto the support Fea offered. The room suddenly exploded with energy, nearly throwing him into the wall nearby.
As the wave ended, the air grew heavy and intense. It felt alive, causing his skin to bristle.
Essence…
That thought was not his, but it did not matter. He already knew, even as he activated his mana sight.
Instantly, he became blinded by pure white, what he could only assume to be the color of essence. He waited a moment for his vision to adjust before bringing his attention back to Yedril. The elf’s body was black as the void. It reminded him a lot of Zira’s own special magic…
A speck of white caught his attention. It was barely visible, sitting near where Yedril’s heart should be. Its light sputtered, threatening to fade out.
His soul.
If it were not for Fea, he might have lost it. If he was alone, truly alone, he would have believed Yedril was already dead.
But Felix wasn’t. He knew what to do, he needed to gather and feed the mana essence to the elf. His only concern was, could he do it?
You can… Fea whispered into his mind.
With a nod, he lifted a hand. With his mana manipulation, he gathered as much essence as he could and trapped it within a ball.
He stared at it with his mana sight, watching it swirl uncontrollably. He tried to squeeze it, it was far too large for what he needed it to be.
It condensed for a moment then stopped. The same problem as before reared its ugly head, it would not go any further.
That wasn’t all, either. His own mana was reacting strangely to it, becoming more and more unstable as he tried to contain it all.
Why?
His serenity threatened to crack with his frustration.
Fea’s hand appeared in his vision, clasping around his outstretched one. Calm yourself, you already know why.
Giving into her advice, he let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. What was he doing wrong?
Sweat was forming on his brow, the strain of both holding the essence and trying to puzzle out a solution was starting to get to him. Even with Fea’s attempts to calm him.
Meanwhile, Yedril had stopped convulsing and was now lying still. His soul, fading with every passing moment…
Felix was running out of time.
He closed his eyes, taking a breath to help keep himself calm. The memory of him casting Fea’s spell came to him. Watching it replay, he looked for anything that he missed–
He saw it. He saw what he had done…
His eyes flew open and he stared into the ball of pure essence. All this time I have been forcing it to do what I want. Not once had I tried anything different…
Bringing it closer to him, Felix hugged the ball to his chest. Please, help Yedril. Give him your strength.
He stopped his attempt at forcing it into compliance, feeling it start to rupture. Now, he would work with it, only gently guiding it. The ball dissipated, but the mana essence remained in place.
It was chaotic, shapeless, and probing. Yet, with his new approach, he used his mana manipulation to subtly move it and shape it into something useful. It still held its chaotic nature, but it was now malleable.
However, before he could congratulate himself, his eyes turned once more to Yedril’s unmoving body. His soul blinked out one final time, shattering. Like tiny embers those too began to dim…
NO!
Felix set to work and plunged the mana and his hand down onto Yedril’s chest, directly on the last few sparkles of light.
PLEASE, DON’T BE TOO LATE!
The essence responded, quickly seeping through Yedril’s body. Meanwhile, the little embers were dying out in droves.
Soon, only a scant few remained…
COME ON! Felix wasted no time and with his second hand, began gathering more and guiding it towards Yedril as well.
Finally, with enough mana essence flooding Yedril’s body, it found where his soul once was. There was no barrier to stop it…
A single spark, a single speck of sparkling dust remained…
He’s–
Felix couldn’t finish the thought. The essence found and latched onto the cooling ember. It poured into that tiny speck.
The last remnant of Yedril’s soul suddenly expanded and sucked in more. It pulled at the cold, shattered pieces, setting them–
In an instant, he was blinded as Yedril’s body became white, whiter than the essence in the air.
A choking gasp sounded from the elf…
A few minutes later, Felix reemerged from the den. In his arms, he carried Yedril’s limp form.
The others were outside, waiting and fearing the worst. None said a word as he walked directly towards Solanna. Her eyes were bloodshot, her face was puffy, she was still crying…
He stopped in front of her.
“Yedril–” Felix’s voice cracked.
“Yedril is alive…”
​
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
​
Eri found herself pacing, back and forth, in front of Kyrith. Night was fast approaching, and no one wanted to leave the sanctity of the hatchery. Especially after everything that had happened…
Nearby, and laying on a mat was Watcher. He had collapsed at some point, and no one had noticed until after. Eri felt terrible for that alone.
Somewhere on the other side of the hatchery, Lorem and Noria were sitting and leaning against each other. The experience had left Noria beyond shaken and now Lorem was comforting her.
Letting out a sigh, Eri glanced over to Felix. He was leaning against Zira and pretending to be resting. However, she could easily see he was trembling. It left nothing to be said about how close of a call it had been…
Finally, there was Solanna and Yedril. Solanna was sitting with Yedril’s head in her lap. She gently stroked his hair while he rested in a bundle of blankets and pillows. They had decided it would be best to keep him here.
Moving him didn’t make sense. The den was filled with essence. If something happened, Yedril would need to be moved back into it…
Eri… Kyrith whined to her. Come rest, please?
She shook her head. I can’t… I feel like I have to stay moving or else– She cut the thought off. Already she was feeling useless. If she stopped, she feared she would break down.
The dragon said nothing more, but she could feel the gaze of worried eyes.
I love you, Kyrith. I promise to spend tonight here, with you. That seemed to have the effect she was hoping for as he suddenly let happiness flood through their bond.
She smiled for just a moment before her gaze drifted back to Yedril and Solanna. I suppose I should at least see how she is doing.
Letting out a tired sigh, Eri made her way over and kneeled down next to the other elven woman. “How are you doing?” She asked.
“He’s…fine.” Solanna responded, not once taking her eyes off her brother.
Eri could only wince. Felix had warned them just how close Yedril had been from death. If he was a moment late– No, I don’t want to think of that. She forced the thought away.
“That’s good, but not what I asked. I said, how are you doing?”
Solanna blinked, dried tear streaks were visible running down her face. “I…don’t know. I always knew something like this was going to happen… I thought I was prepared.”
Reaching her arm around Solanna, Eri pulled her into a side hug. “It will never be easy.”
“Have… Have you ever lost someone? Because as I watched, I couldn’t think of him not being around. I thought for sure he was dead… My heart couldn’t take it. I just wanted to see him smiling one more time.”
Eri waited for Solanna to finish before she responded. “Perhaps, you should get some rest?” she said carefully, ignoring the original question. “I–”
The other elf shook her head. “No, I… I want to be awake for when he wakes.”
Oh Solanna… “Yedril probably won’t wake tonight. Besides, I never said you couldn’t sleep here next to him.”
She seemed to consider Eri’s words. “Maybe in a little bit…”
Eri opened her mouth but a knock from the hatchery’s entrance stopped her. Looking up, she found Ithea waiting outside. Curious, she stood up.
“I’ll be back in a few moments,” she said and briskly walked over to Ithea.
“Good evening,” the dragon woman said as she came to a stop. Eri almost wanted to snap at that, it certainly hadn’t been a good day so far…
“Yes?” she asked instead.
Ithea must have read her expression and quickly cleared her throat. “I mean… I was, uh, wanting to see how Yedril was faring?” She sounded stiff, not at all how she would normally act.
Not Zira? She’s hardly shown any interest in the other elves– Wait a second… “How do you know something happened?”
The dragon woman let her icy smile show for a brief moment before dropping it. “I can taste mana,” she said, as if that explained it.
Seeing that Ithea wasn’t going to elaborate, Eri gestured over to Yedril with her head. “Well, he is over there. But please, be respectful. Solanna hasn’t taken this well.”
“I promise.”
“Then follow me.” With that Eri led Ithea back to Solanna.
“Hey, Solanna? Ithea is here–”
Ithea immediately dropped to a knee and peered down over Yedril. “Hmm, interesting… Very interesting,” she muttered, letting some of her normal personality out.
“What are you doing?!” Solanna shouted, completely startled.
“Hmm? Oh, right…” She cleared her throat. “I merely wanted to see how he was doing… I’m glad I made the decision to check in.”
She suddenly pulled out a vial. “Here, give this to him when he wakes. It will help him.”
Eri furrowed her brows as she stared out the offered vail. In it, was a dark brown liquid. “What is it?”
“A potion–”
“We can’t give him anything magical!” Eri nearly shouted, cutting Ithea off. She was already regretting her decision to let the dragon woman in.
“Relax, it's non-magical. A simple herbal brew that will sooth his mind when he wakes up.”
“Non-magical…? Wait, what do you mean it will ‘sooth his mind?’ What’s wrong with him?” Eri asked cautiously. Had we missed something?
Ithea gestured to Yedril. “He’s gone through a traumatic event. When he wakes, he may still feel like he’s going through it. This potion will help calm him.” She handed the potion over to Eri. “Trust me, I’ve seen something like this before.”
“You have?” Solanna asked, beating Eri to the question.
Ithea nodded and smiled, it was almost somber. “Plenty of times, unfortunately… Thankfully, it appears that Felix did an adequate job. Yedril will probably wake in the morning, if I had to guess.”
“I…see, thank you,” Eri muttered, unsure what to make of this situation. Still, she pocketed the vial. Where did she even get it?
“Anyway, I won’t stay for long…” The dragon woman stood up and looked over to Zira. “I know how much I am unliked.”
“T-thank you,” Solanna said as Ithea began moving towards her daughter. Ithea merely waved it away…
Shaking herself out of her confusion, Eri quickly got up and followed after. They came to halt before the glaring eyes that belonged to Zira. She didn’t look happy to see her mother.
“Zira,” Ithea said.
“Ithea.” Zira narrowed her eyes and curled her tail around Felix, causing him to stir.
“How are you doing?” Ithea asked, her tone neutral.
Her daughter stared at her for several moments before finally responding. “Fine…but what do you want?”
Throwing up her hands defensively, Ithea answered. “I merely came to see how my– How you were doing…” There was a sudden and noticeable change in her demeanor as she dropped her hands.
“Listen, Zira… I know I haven’t been a good person, let alone a good mother–”
Zira snorted.
“–But I am trying to change that. I know I have a lot to do to improve, and plenty of things to fix…” She glanced over to Felix. “But I’ve been thinking about this for a while. Someday, I want to be able to call you my daughter. And…perhaps, you can call me mother?”
She must have really put a lot of thought into this, Eri thought to herself. It was clear to her that Ithea was taking this seriously. But will Zira or Felix?
As if on cue, Felix slowly got to his feet.
“Ithea,” he said, stepping over Zira’s tail. “I know you hate me, and I know you have your reasons.” He started a slow and unsteady walk up to them. “But whoever I was…then? I am not that person.”
Felix stopped in front of Ithea and held out a hand. “Can you forgive me– The current me for what my past self did?”
Eri watched with bated breath for how Ithea would respond.
Meanwhile, Zira’s mother stared down at Felix’s hand. There was a long pause while emotions played across her face.
Suddenly, she came to a decision and looked directly into Felix’s eyes. Her hand grasped his.
“Yes.”
​
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So Yedril isn't dead, I guess... Damn, I thought for sure he would be. Oh well. Let's not forget about Ithea, though. Looks like she's taking the first small steps towards mending her relationship with her daughter. We shall see how things progress with that.

I am not the OOP. The OOP is u/One_Tone_4608 posting in AmItheAsshole
Concluded as per OOP
1 update - Medium
Original - 20th April 2024
Update - 28th April 2024
​
AITAH for not supporting my sister’s engagement?
​
I (24 F) am planning my wedding to my partner of almost 6 years. We got engaged at the end of November 2023 and we set our wedding date for September 2024! Before we get into the current situation I want to provide a little context. When we were growing up it was always abundantly clear that my sister (20 F) was the family favorite. She was always given special privileges and talked more highly of than me. For this reason, we didn’t get along during our childhood and most of our teenage years.
After attending therapy as an adult, I came to understand that I couldn’t hold my parents treatment towards her against her because she was a child and the only people to blame are my parents. After working through that, her and I became really close. For the past few years we have been inseparable. She’s my best friend and I am hers. I asked her to be my MOH and she was so excited!
She started dating her current BF (21 M) in late October of 2023. Of course, he just so happens to be everything my family has ever dreamed of in a son-in-law. The exact opposite of my partner. The past 6 months they have been together my sister’s partner is all my family talks about, even at my bridal appointments. Right after my engagement my sister said that when she found out about my upcoming engagement she made it clear to her BF that this year was about me so she didn’t want him to bring up anything marriage related until after my wedding. She said she wanted this to be my year.
I’ve dreamed of this wedding my entire life and maybe it’s selfish to say but I just wanted this one thing to actually be about me.
This leads us to the current situation. Last night my sister (20 F) and her boyfriend of 6 months (21 M) FaceTimed me together and told me that they decided to get married. They said that he would go to ask my parents either today or tomorrow for permission and then he would immediately go buy a ring. They then said that they want me to help plan the official proposal which will happen in 2-3 weeks with the wedding set for November 2024. I told them that I needed time to process and I ended the FaceTime.
An hour later, my sister called me to talk about it and I was sobbing. I explained to her how badly it hurt me that she of all people would do this after she promised that she would let this be my year. I explained to her that I want to be happy for her but I am grieving the loss of my special day because the second our family hears about their engagement it will be as if I and my wedding doesn’t exist. She cried while I explained myself and then said “don’t worry about it. Just don’t worry about it. I have to go.” And hung up the phone. I haven’t heard from her since. Right now I feel like I have lost my wedding and my best friend. I am the villain in her story for ruining her moment and she is the villain in my story for taking this milestone from me even after she promised she wouldn’t.
Where do we go from here? AITAH for not just being happy for her?
​
Comments
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FAFO-13
NTA. But I would definitely take a step back from your entire family. Your sister wants to be the main character and it seems like she’s jealous because you were getting all the attention.
Disastrous-Sthe
This! Deep down, she's not really your best friend. Plan your wedding and have a fabulous time with people who actually want to celebrate you and don't want to secretly compete with you.
Otherwise_Degree_729
NTA. She did it on purpose. She got engaged 6 months into the relationship. Now you have to plan her “official proposal”, after that they will ask you to plan other events for her wedding. They not even officially engaged and already have a wedding date coincidently one month after yours. If they look for venues they are going to find one available for a month prior to your wedding. Your sister gives the vibe of an immature child that needs to get something first at all costs and that of a high school bully that says something then does something else entirely.
​
**Judgement - NTA*\*
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Update - 8 days later
​
Thank you all for the advice in the comments of my original post! I’m sorry for taking so long to post an update for you! Btw the sister is NOT pregnant!
I spoke with my sister on Tuesday of this past week and it was not a very positive conversation. I was still extremely hurt and she was angry with me for ruining her excitement. I ended that conversation by telling her that at the end of the day, she would have to make her choice on wether they would go through with this engagement and wedding or wait until after my wedding based on what felt most right to her. She left me on read and I didn’t reach back out because I felt like the ball was in her court.
Last night she reached out to me and apologized for hurting my feelings. She said that she doesn’t want things to be bad between us over this. She then started asking me more questions about how I felt. After some more explanation I asked her if she had talked to her boyfriend about our phone call. She said that she did and when I asked how it went she said that he told her she needed to reach out to me and try to make things right. She said it took her awhile to reach out because she was still trying to process her emotions but ultimately she knew he was right.
I asked her what they decided to do and she said that after several days of talking it over they have decided to postpone the proposal until after my wedding in September. She said that their new plan is to get engaged soon after my wedding and plan their wedding for early 2025. They have not said anything to our family about the engagement and my family has been blissfully unaware of the state of my sister and I’s relationship.
I guess you could say that this is the best case scenario for this situation. There is still quite a bit of tension between my sister and I but hopefully that will get better with time.
​
Comments
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MaeveCarpenter
You need to make sure she understands she can't be proposed to at your wedding.
fleet_and_flotilla · 15 hr. ago
your sister may not be pregnant, but I question the idea of talking proposals and marriage after six months. i would recommend you speak to her about the insanity of that choice, but given the situation as it is, it's probably best not to add any fuel to a still smoldering fire.

OOP: My parents have been encouraging her to do this since they hit the one month mark in their relationship. I whole heartedly believe that my parents are more interested in getting him into the family (he’s their dream son) rather than looking out for her best interest. Because of this, a couple months ago I sat her down and had a hard conversation.

She was upset with me for a couple days but I told her that I could not live with myself if I didn’t at least give her another perspective on this relationship. She lives with our parents so she is hearing their perspective every day. I explained issues that can come up with someone that you don’t fully know yet. And I told her that at the end of the day I wanted to protect her from ending up in a situation that I have been in in the past. I tried to explain to her that some things you only learn about a person in time.
Right now you’re in the honeymoon phase of the relationship and that’s not an accurate representation of what the relationship will be. People are usually on their best behavior at the beginning and then over time as they become more comfortable and the new starts wearing off things can change. I finished the conversation by saying that if he really loves you and has all the best intentions with you he will still be here a year from now. A good man will not walk away from you because you want to date for one year before getting engaged/married.
I guess she didn’t take what I said to heart and decided to take her chances.
​
I am not the OOP. Please do not harass the OOP.
Please remember the No Brigading Rule and to be civil in the comments

Hey friends! We could have a long debate on the ethics of many aspects of the travel we do...and while I'd rather not open that can of worms, I do think that we have a rare opportunity to address a broad audience here and I'd like to make a positive impact if possible.
It's clear based on post activity that we have lots of folks interested in "animal tourism." Personally, this is one of my favorite aspects of travel as I am a huge animal lover. As a bit of context, my goal is to open an animal sanctuary in the near future -- no exotics, don't worry - just neglected domesticated animals that deserve a better life :) I realize with my personal passion of animal welfare, I skew off the mean. While I don't expect everyone to be as passionate about this as I am, I know the vast majority are responsible citizens/travelers and want to promote ethical operators and experiences.
So that all being said, I want to share my thoughts as a professional in this industry and get a bit of a discussion going if folks want to engage.
When engaging in animal tourism: whether it be safari (game drives), gorilla trekking, elephant "sanctuaries", orangutang trekking, scuba, whale watching, rainforest hikes, viewing endangered species in their natural habitat etc etc - please please do your research to support ethical operators. It is really easy to fall prey to people trying to part you with your money and selling you on a lie of their operation being ethical when really they are either hurting the habitat of the animals, actively confining them, illegally sourcing them through the exotic animal trade, intentionally killing the adults to raise the babies or some mix of all of the above. I nearly fell prey to this myself recently with an operator in Zakynthos that I was going to use to go see the endangered Caretta-Caretta sea turtles. And had I not asked around and done a bunch more research, I would have been participating in a practice that further damages their precious ecosystem - hastening their endangered status.
We are all in Chubby Travel and thus have the means to pay for top rate experiences, so as a general rule, if something looks "cheap" as it relates to exotic animal tourism - there's probably a reason.
Trust me, I am not against animal tourism as the interest from tourists is what ensures many of these habitats stay protected - otherwise more would be destroyed for logging and agriculture. But finding good operators who share similar values is paramount to ensuring your money is well spent.
Places like Singita are so expensive because they funnel so much of their money back into active conservation to give these majestic animals as close to a natural life as possible. And while Singita may be out of reach in some cases, there are less expensive operators that you can support who still care just as much about conservation.
One of my projects in the near future is to create an "ethical animal tourism" database (similar to the Hotel Perks & Promos database that so many of you are using) to help all of us better navigate this space and ensure we are supporting good actors with our travel.
Sorry if isn't the type of content people are expecting to see - but with more and more people interested in this type of travel, if even the 10,000 of us are mindful of the ethics and impact of how we visit these animals - it will make a difference!

Hello all,
I’m (28M), work in sales, and this year I’m on track to earn anywhere between £120k - £175k (depending on what clients I can continue to win this year).
This will be the first year I’ve earn’t anywhere close to this, and am at a loss of where I should funnel this extra income.
This is made up of:

• £75k basic salary (c.£3900 post tax per month)
• £50k to £100k anticipated range of commission (£31k of this already guaranteed for the year).

Current Savings/Investments: - £17k emergency fund (4% interest) - £38k cash (6% interest fixed savings account) - £16k Invested (ISA - VUSA) - £39k pension (split across x3 providers)
Ultimately, I already own a home and will use the equity in this (c. £100k) as a deposit for the ‘forever’ home down the line. So don’t necessarily need tons of extra cash on hand for a house purchase - especially as my partner and I both enjoy living within our means.
I do, however, want the option to retire early (in my 40s). Which means I will need a significant amount invested from where I am today to tide me over before my pension can be released etc.
Where I’m stuck, is that I’m torn between pushing absolutely everything else I earn this year into my pension to keep myself below the 60% tax trap, or taking the hit on losing my personal allowance, and splitting the rest between my ISA allowance & high interest savings accounts.
With the potential of ending the year much closer to £200k (which for me is an insane scenario to be in), would it be worth just taking the hit and accessing/ investing the money now?
It feels almost too conservative to chuck it all into a pension and not leave myself with anything to enjoy in the short term - or feel like I can’t ‘access’ this money whenever I might want/need.
This way, while I take a hit on the tax upfront, I can still invest it and draw down on this much earlier than when my pension would ever become available to me.
Open to ideas - any suggestions welcome!

Good things only (I think it’s worth the read)!

• Staying in the moment, not thinking ahead or behind and keeping focus. The Islanders have tried to push us around some and start some altercations but we have been very disciplined as to not take untimely and poor penalties. The times we have been more physical were definitely the right time and place.
  
• HUGE SHOUTOUT TO SVECH. The Islanders have been trying to get under his skin since Game 1 and I’m almost positive he hasn’t had a single penalty minute this series. He took some massive hits in Game 4 but was able to collect himself and work towards the bigger picture.
  
• Our ability to get knocked down and get back up without looking for immediate retaliation. I feel like we have been very methodical and calculated when it comes to getting back at big hits.
  
• Our ability to beat the Islanders at home. The regular season we lost both games at home to them. It was definitely good to see that those loses did not affect them.
  
• Our ability to persevere when the bounces are going our way. Overall, I think we have played pretty lackluster during this series but that could also be because the islanders are doing a good job at blocking shots and have picked up their intensity. I think says something about this team that they are winning 3-1 but we are still seeing that this team is not playing half as good as they can.
  
• The fan base that we have is unparalleled and I think that this team feels it. I watched replays and highlights of many of the games in the playoffs so far and I think not a single team or fan base comes close to the interaction that we have with our team and the interaction that they give us.
  
• Many of the teams that are getting knocked out or have been knocked out, their fans are immediately coming to support us. I think that speaks volumes to how good this team is and how good the rest of the league thinks this team is. It’s a truly special thing to witness.
  

P.S. - This is my first season being a Canes fan (my father-in-law and brother-in-law turned me into a Caniac at the beginning of the season). Before this season, I never watched hockey and never thought I would be a hockey fan, but I can proudly say that this Canes team in particular won me over and got me REALLY into hockey.
GO CANES!

Good things only (I think it’s worth the read)!

• Staying in the moment, not thinking ahead or behind and keeping focus. The Islanders have tried to push us around some and start some altercations but we have been very disciplined as to not take untimely and poor penalties. The times we have been more physical were definitely the right time and place.
  
• HUGE SHOUTOUT TO SVECH. The Islanders have been trying to get under his skin since Game 1 and I’m almost positive he hasn’t had a single penalty minute this series. He took some massive hits in Game 4 but was able to collect himself and work towards the bigger picture.
  
• Our ability to get knocked down and get back up without looking for immediate retaliation. I feel like we have been very methodical and calculated when it comes to getting back at big hits.
  
• Our ability to beat the Islanders at home. The regular season we lost both games at home to them. It was definitely good to see that those loses did not affect them.
  
• Our ability to persevere when the bounces are going our way. Overall, I think we have played pretty lackluster during this series but that could also be because the islanders are doing a good job at blocking shots and have picked up their intensity. I think says something about this team that they are winning 3-1 but we are still seeing that this team is not playing half as good as they can.
  
• The fan base that we have is unparalleled and I think that this team feels it. I watched replays and highlights of many of the games in the playoffs so far and I think not a single team or fan base comes close to the interaction that we have with our team and the interaction that they give us.
  
• Many of the teams that are getting knocked out or have been knocked out, their fans are immediately coming to support us. I think that speaks volumes to how good this team is and how good the rest of the league thinks this team is. It’s a truly special thing to witness.
  

P.S. - This is my first season being a Canes fan (my father-in-law and brother-in-law turned me into a Caniac at the beginning of the season). Before this season, I never watched hockey and never thought I would be a hockey fan, but I can proudly say that this Canes team in particular won me over and got me REALLY into hockey.
GO CANES!

So I’ve been crushing hard on my friend. We’re both wlw, we hold hands and we tease each other all the time, so I thought we were flirting. We’re both anxious and she told me she has to really become close with people before dating or anything. But then she sent me a tik tok saying “when we’ve been friends for too long and enter the sibling phase.” It was a tik tok about arguing with eachother. I really thought it was just us liking eachother, and now I feel dumb and a bit heartbroken.

Naadi konchem vintha katha. US lo putti perigaanu kaani I have always felt more connected to my Telugu roots vs American side.
Telugu loney matladataaniki ishtapadatha, roju eenaadu chaduvutha, paatha paatalu vinta, chepkuntu pothe inka chaala ne unnay vichithraalu.
High school aipoyaaka maa intlo vaallani bathilaadaanu BTech India lo cheyyaniyamani (literally made a PowerPoint presentation of why it wouldn't nuke my career lol) kaani assalu oppukoledu.
Sare ani I tried to make the best of it.
But even though I made some lifelong friends in undergrad (all of whom are coincidentally from India, though from Delhi, Bombay, Pune etc), I never found that Telugu touch I was craving for my whole life.
College ayyaaka adrushtam koddi manchi job maa oorulone dorikindi so I shut my brain up, grew my career and built a great nest egg.
Last year India loney konnaallu pani cheddaam anna uddesham tho vellaanu, but I felt so out of place and lonely that I came back a month later. Cousins chinnappatnunchi pattinchukoru kaabatti vaalla meeda em aasalu petkoledu kaani it seemed like every. single. person had a set group of school/inteBTech friends and wouldn't venture outside of it.
Sare India aithe kashtam and jeetham paranga kuda konchem tough pill to swallow ani I got an internal transfer to Dallas (the purported Hyderabad away from Hyderabad) the moment I came back and moved here 3 months ago.
Kaani ikkada kuda aa ekaantham anipinchesariki inka em cheyyaalo ardam kaavatledu.
I got in with a nice batch at UTD and my colleagues are friendly but no one ever thinks to pick up the phone and ask me to do something (even though I ALWAYS say yes).
I just don't get it. I'm social, people laugh when I'm around, kalisina prathi okkarini daggari vaalla laaney choostha (money paranga aina, vaalla baadhalu vinadam paranga aina), but people still keep me at an arms length.
That feeling gets compounded when I see folks like one of my colleagues, who people are CONSTANTLY after to hang out thanu ennadu phone cheyyakapoyina and enni saarlu no anna (and it's not because people are trying to hit on her).
At this point, I just want to redo the last 7 years. While I thank my stars every day that I'm financially doing well, I have a great family, etc, I just can't stop thinking about the what ifs: what if I'd gone to India, what if I'd made that circle then, what if.
Aalonchinchinappudu stupid anipinchina, I'm thinking about taking a 6 month leave of absence and enrolling in a BTech in Hyderabad (at least for a semester). I look pretty young so I think I can come up with a less sad backstory when people inevitably ask.
Inkemaina chesedi unte cheppandi bondhas.
I can't spend the rest of my life feeling alone.

So I’ve been crushing hard on my friend. We’re both wlw, we hold hands and we tease each other all the time, so I thought we were flirting. We’re both anxious and she told me she has to really become close with people before dating or anything. But then she sent me a tik tok saying “when we’ve been friends for too long and enter the sibling phase.” It was a tik tok about arguing with eachother. I really thought it was just us liking eachother, and now I feel dumb and a bit heartbroken.

I F(19) have been dating my bf M(19) for almost two years since hs. we dated during the last year of hs and was honestly too focused on graduating and getting into college that any problems we encountered were just brushed under and not brought up. Additionally hes the type of person (or at least used to be) who is quite avoidant and was unable to effectively communicate his feelings. I felt like although he was a great person we were just very different people.
For example, i love to talk but he doesnt so all our convos felt so onesided and i felt tired dragging it on, also i feel like on some sides our values didnt align so there was always a level of judgement and hostility towards each other and where we were placing our time/our achievements in life
After graduating I was honestly ready to break up with him but we went on a grad trip together overseas i started growing very attached to him - the time we spent was so good i saw myself building a future with him - but also i realise that life itself cannot just be a little bubble with just us two.
We went to different unis that are still very close to each other so distance isnt the problem but we run in very different circles. i have grown a lot in uni and branched out socially, met a lot of new people and go out very often. On the other hand, my bf hasnt made a lot of new friends and sticks with his hs ones, and spends most of his time alone or studying. He doesnt restrict me at all and im free to do whatever but it always bothers me knowing that whilst im out hes just at home. ik he prefers it that way and hes not ‘waiting for me’ or anything but it sometimes feels a bit like that and i feel guilty for not spending more time with him. And honestly idek if I rly want to..
Hes been such a good bf to me supportive, loving, and always always there for me. I know it definitely is supposed to end now and I cant carry on in this relationship feeling like this but I’m scared of the emptiness that will follow after having had him to talk to for the past 2 years of my life as I’ve also relied on him a lot.
I dont know how to tell him this bcs the last time i brought it up he was genuinely shocked and said he thought our relationship was going perfectly. Also i dont know how to keep myself strong and go through with it cause a small part of me wants to stay with him and just make it work.. Please help
TL;DR been dating for two years and hes been a great boyfriend but I just dont think hes right for me. Feel horrible dont know what to say or how to keep myself strong and go ahead with it when he hasnt done anything wrong.

Toxic Friendship.
Don’t know really why im doing this post but i just feel i need to express it about my friend. We shall call her “Rachel” just for show. I am from a rural village and let’s just say drinking is very much just a part of the mold in the local area. Probably due to the fact there is nothing else to do here and the only business’s around here are a coop , a cafe and a pub so there isn’t much else to do
Rachel is not much of a drinker at all which is fine. Me and our other friend i shall call Sarah do both drink. Not on the daily or anything just at the weekend. Im never against people not being big drinkers one of my other friends doesn’t really drink but when she is out she still has fun with us without needing a drink at all. What i dont get about Rachel is she suggests going to the pub but clearly hates it and does this thing where she orders a drink and just nurses it. But what is strange is when we do rounds she always asks for a drink but they all just gather up in front of her and she never drinks them. I am not the type to judge like if she didn’t want booze she doesn’t have to get it so i find it strange she does
Rachel’s problem is with most things in life is that if people do things differently from them , then they are wrong in her mind. She hasn’t got many friends due to her judgemental attitude and hating nearly everyone. With the pub being in a small area everyone knows everyone so usually by the end everyone is talking to each other and she gets really pissed off if anyone talks to us in the pub she looks down on especially if they are other girls.
We had got along fine but ever since we went on holiday things have been a bit tension filled between us. Me , Rachel and Sarah went to an all inclusive in Lanzarote. From the get go you could tell she was annoyed as me and Sarah would occasionally get a cocktail by the pool etc while we were there. Anyway we end up in a bar near our hotel. There are these guys there who sit round us. If they were girls Rachel would be furious but because they were men she is more than happy. My friend Sarah starts to feel a bit uncomfy with one of the guys perving on her but Rachel makes it worse by moving Sarah’s seat next to the bloke when she was at the bar.
We somehow end up back at these guys apartment. Me and Sarah end up pretty drunk along with all these guys. Rachel was very eager to go back to shag one of the guys even though she has a boyfriend at home. shes in the room doing her business. The pervy guy starts sleazing on Sarah again and shes visibly uncomfortable. In my drunk thinking as a way to stop him perving i say that they have boyfriends which is true. maybe not the nicest thing to do but it was drunk thinking. Sarah is happy that it keeps the guy away. Anyway i start feeling a bit worse for ware and want to go i ask if one of them can walk me back as i forgot the way back to our hotel since I’m crap at directions. Sarah jumps to leave and Rachel just grudgingly comes with us
On the walk i get asked by Rachel if i said they had boyfriends. I said yes that they do have boyfriends and went to explain them all of a sudden i feel a solid punch to the side of my face. Im shocked and turn to her. She then shoves me and my ankle goes over the pavement and my knee pops. I injured it in the past and it pops at times. She then starts shouting at me in a weird Glaswegian voice sounding like Martha from baby reindeer. She accuses me of ruining the holiday with my drinking and says I’m an alcoholic. She then says shes the only friend who has stuck by me and that i have. The reality of that is hypocritical when i have other friends and she doesn’t because shes so rude to people. Accused me of ruining the day we went to the beach because i was “gagging” for a drink. Sarah still laughs about that part because it was actually her who wanted to check out a bar she got advised to go to and i wasn’t anything to do with it. Anyway basically just for like an hour she shouted at me in the streets then decided she wouldn’t let me back in the hotel and that I’m not grateful for the holiday. Not being funny i paid for the holiday so don’t get why i have to be grateful towards her for me going on holiday
The rest of the holiday is spent kind of frosty between us. Sarah was afraid to drink at all for the last couple days and to be honest i was too. I regret backing down to her. Just because she has issues with people drinking should not stop us. Plus it’s an all inclusive in Lanzarote. We got drunk 3 nights of the 8 days which really isn’t bad considering what brits abroad are usually like
We get home and i have never been so happy to be back. I decide I’m never going on holiday with her again. Shit goes down a bit because Sarah hangs out with mine and her childhood friend Jenny. Jenny is also Rachel’s arch nemesis. Sarah ends up cracking and telling Jenny about what went down on the holiday. Jenny cant help herself but gossip so people start hearing about Rachel attacking me and her cheating on her boyfriend. Rachel hears and starts flipping her lid over it but manages to convince her boyfriend who is lets just say hen pecked that she didn’t cheat but also said that it was Sarah who wanted to be round the boys. A few weeks later me and Sarah end up on a night out with Jenny who books a holiday for the three of us low key against our will but we end up thinking we may as well. This ends up making Rachel furious. She would maybe be invited if she didn’t have a weird one sided feud with Jenny
A few months go by and we all end up on a night out as Sarahs brother came back to the area. This ended with Sarahs boyfriend saying we can have an after party at his. I find out that Rachel has been trying to convince them to not let me go and take me home then they go to the afters. Sarah , her brother and boyfriend are all closer to me so i dont get why she even tried it. I grew up with Sarah and her brother. Rachel only became friends with Sarah through me in the last couple years but are still more friends of a friend kind of situation
So we start walking to the house and i twist my ankle. Nothing new there as I’m very known for being clumsy. My old workplace used to call me mr fall. Anyway i go to carry on walking and Rachel starts shouting at me again. Usual stuff calling me an alcoholic. I hadn’t drank in a month before that night. Instead of taking it like i did on holiday i give it back to her both barrels and we end up in a blazing row. She starts saying i have nobody but i fire back with who has she got i have a small group of friends the reality is she has nobody because shes so mean. I then bring up the holiday. She says i deserved the punch i got. She also kicks off about the holiday with Jenny even telling me to cancel it. She soon realises shes not winning the fight and bursts into tears about how i treat her terribly etc and how i made her cry going on holiday with Jenny. i end up apologising like a mug but she just goes home and i go back to my friends boyfriends house.
Now i don’t know if shes a witch or something but that night when i was leaving my friends apartment the staircase top step broke because it was rotten wood. Me being cursed ends up being the first to step on it. It breaks and i fall 15 feet and break my ribs and hurt my whole body
Although it was a serious fall. The next day when me and Sarah talk about it we cant help but find it hilarious because her brother just saw me disappear in front of him. Our parents even get in on the joke and it almost because a meme within our group because I’m such a cluts they said it can only happen to me
Anyway it’s been two months since then and Rachel has been trying to get me the last couple weeks to go to the pub. I had something on and one night i just could bot be bothered. So me her and Sarah go out. Sarah brings up the fall and we end up laughing about it again. I go to the toilet and Rachel says “its not even funny, it should have been a wake up call that they desperately need” , not being funny we have all had drunken falls but i step breaking under me is kind of out of my control. Plus Sarahs brother fell through one too lucky for him it was at the bottom. I then go up to get another drink. Sarah is at the toilet. i offer Rachel a drink but she points at her and Sarahs unfinished drinks. I jokingly say “you bunch of losers” just a joke at them being slow drinkers. Literally a harmless very obvious joke. I don’t think loser is a real insult for anyone above 13. She tells Sarah when she gets back from the loo that i called them that but makes it out like i did it nastily. Sarah is used to her shit so she doesn’t care
Rachel leaves early thank god because she is tired and thats when Sarah told me all the things she said. She also revealed Rachel and her boyfriend came into the cafe she worked in and she was moaning about how she did not want to go out tonight and act like i dragged them out when the reality is i just felt bad because she had asked me out a few times and i never went
Im sorry it’s so lengthy but i don’t know what to do anymore. I admit I’m not perfect but i feel its getting to a whole new level with her and i just feel so drained by it all. She hates drinking but then never makes plans outside of the pub. I just don’t get her. I am not perfect at all and over the years i have been the person in the wrong in some of our falls outs I’ll never deny that. I think her issues are mainly just with people drinking in general but i think she needs to remember that just because you don’t like something doesn’t mean everyone else does

Me and my boyfriend took shrooms two nights ago. We lemon tekked them and then randomly fell asleep. When I woke up I was tripping balls. Was kind of in disbelief and panic even though I've done them many many times before and I know what to expect. It was weird. The colors n stuff were cool but I rolled over and went on my phone. First thing I saw was my best friends art and I just started balling. I cried for two hours. My boyfriend has allergies and mainly woke up because his eyes were itching and he was sneezing, but again he was also tripping so he didn't know what to do. It was so bad the tears wouldn't stop.
For context my friend is kind of an addict and does a lot of stuff. Recently they've been dating a drug dealer too old for them and it feels like they're becoming more and more isolated. They leave me on delivered and seen a lot, always telling me they're busy but if I ask if there's an issue they assure me everything is fine. It's not fine. They do K and coke like there's no tomorrow. Theyve sold too many clothes for drug money, they've stolen drugs from my friends, they've started becoming paranoid and lying to me. A lot of their recent behavior has been irrational and hurtful. When I was tripping, I felt this incredible sense of doom about them. I know if they don't stop it's either rehab or death. At first they were functional but now I know they don't have any control. I'm scared to lose them as a friend and they become isolated with their partner and lose everything they have. I had a lot of bad thoughts on that trip that haven't went away. I think it triggered a depressive episode. I can't describe the dread I felt.
I'm not the same after that.

I’m still in school out of state but I’m looking to move back to California about 6 months after I graduate (when my kids will be in summer vacation so they can start the new school year in CA). But I’m nervous about job prospects.
I am not a great job candidate. I already know this. I’ve had a horrible time in clinical with anxiety and honestly I picked the wrong career but I’m close to graduation so I’m going to see it through. The only thing I’ve enjoyed was the OR. I’m doing an OR preceptorship here and will likely be hired here. But I also have a job offer at a med spa where they will train me in Botox/filleetc. Aesthetics is where I initially planned to go when I was starting school so I am excited about that opportunity but I basically need to pick between the OR or the aesthetic opportunity when I graduate and I’m not sure which route is best when it comes to how the experience will look when applying for jobs in CA.
Any advice? I think aesthetics is where I will be happiest but I feel like that might be a hard area to get into in CA with only 6 months of experience.

I've posted a lot of what im about to say before so this is just me combining everything to hopefully make the unanswered questions that you have clearer. If you any questions (probably hundreds ahaha) just let me know and I'll try my best to explain. Sorry this is so long as well.
Siobhan is Lilith. I have zero doubt about this. The symbolism with the owls, wild dogs, demonic connections plus the babies and the need to take over the male world makes this theory so clear. This gives her a backstory and explains how she gained powers and why she has been around for so long. It also further explains her motives.
https://www.biblicalarchaeology.org/daily/people-cultures-in-the-bible/people-in-the-bible/lilith/
Siobhan, takes desperate women looking to have it all including having a child and take advantage of that. The women get to decide, to either give up their child and have exactly what they desire or not. However, the one's that see Siobhan's vision and have the qualities to do so are able to join the cult. This group are called the Delicates, a group of satanic witches. The oppressed becoming the oppressors.
Ivy, a long lasting member, died during birth and was rebirthed by Siobhan. Ivy and her two children join the cult and Siobhan gives them all powers. At some point, Ivy lashes out onto Adeline, throwing her across the room, causing her to bleed and then spitting on her. The blood spat lands besides Adeline's lip and Ivy notices this and smears blood on both her own chin and Sonia's, and then declaring how they're now blood bound. The mark is now permanently on all the cult members and soon to be members chins. Adeline doesn't approve of most of what's happening in the cult, just because she was born into it, doesn't mean its for her, and eventually she leaves and Siobhan takes away her power.
At some point, Siobhan meets Dex's dad and later births Dex, a human, a special creation that isn't a demon for the first time ever. Something Siobhan thought would be impossible. Adeline knew about Dex and eventually married him to "give her the middle finger" which is why Adeline didn't want to have kids with Dex. Virginia, Dex's mum, takes care and raises Dex however, she is also drained of blood constantly, which is used for experiments and feeding the babies. Siobhan makes a deal Dr Hill to provide her the mother's babies and she'll make him the most popular fertility specialist and most good looking in NYC. He just has to work for her.
For leaving the cult and marrying Dex, Adeline is coldly killed. Talia, her best friend, managed to join the cult through just being around Adeline. She is also instructed to match Dex with Anna since Talia is also close with him.
Nicolette stalked Anna as a child and implanted all the qualities needed for her to be a perfect maker for the new demon babies. Qualifies such as 'selfish, entitled, vain and ambitious'
Once Anna is older, Siobhan meets her during an IVF meet up and soon she becomes Anna's PR. She is also the reason Anna goes and sees Dr Hill. The Delicates, are evil and mischievous. They are constantly messing with Anna, hallucinations and appearing randomly and watching over Anna. They like to play games and mess with people, including Adeline, making her play the knife game and getting her to try and guess who was the masked witch even while restrained.
The dolls Anna finds aren't so much VooDoo dolls but more so showing the events that will happen or have happened to Anna. Mangled leg doll- paralysis or snake legs, the doll with hair missing and blood- Anna loosing hair and bleeding, the doll with nails in its stomach- intentional miscarriage etc. These dolls are all placed in areas they know Anna will find them while also creating a pentagram. The dolls act like warnings and also directly telling Anna whats gonna happen to her to her face without making it obvious, because the witches are dicks lol. The dolls show the witches plans.
Dex eventually meets Cora, an assistant that works at client simply to pay off her student loans and they sleep together, chesting on Anna. Not only that, he buys her an apartment and sets up cameras so she can watch him and Anna whenever. She slowly became obsessed with Anna, wanting to be her until Dex broke the relationship off, causing her to feel rage and she ultimately attempts to destroy Anna's happiness by moving appointment dates around, leaving medicine out and breaking into the apartment and scaring Anna during the night. Cora also sexual assaults Anna. Cora eventually regrets her actions and during the Oscars she meets up with Anna. When she realises Anna knew who she was she snapped again and revealed everything to her, including the fact that Cora knows that Dr Hill does horrible stuff behind the scenes.
Nicolette is assigned the task to watch over Anna in the house that Talia allowed them to stay in.
Mrs Preecher only wants to warn Anna, about everything she went through is constantly following Anna everything to get her attention. She tries to warn all the women she believes is involved in the cult somehow. She is later killed by the group and her blood is used in experiments.
Siobhan uses men to have babies, like Dex's dad and Hamish. She grants these men and others with power and fame. Siobhan working for Hollywood also shares light into the demoic and satanic practices within Hollywood that's been going on.
Ivy murdered Anna's child in the hospital, causing the miscarriage. Later Anna goes down into the basement and sees a secret tunnel. This is where Anna sees experimented babies in glass jars and she is then kidnapped and the new demon child is created inside Anna.
During the Oscars, Siobhan asks Anna how much she wants the Oscar, Anna says do anything. Siobhan touches Anna's stomach and says "anything?" Anna nodes and Siobhan congratulates her just before her win is officially announced, showing Siohad full control. Then they kiss, sealing the deal, a kiss of death. This also goes back to when Miss Preecher kisses Anna in episode 1 during a hallucination with blood pouring out her mouth after ripping out her tongue.
Anna sees her mother while she is on stage, possibly another gift from Siobhan for giving up the baby.
Now for the finale episode, the real pain in the butt for me to work out but I think I got it. I'll just discuss everything I think was important.
"My little spies" Siobhan announces when the owl and cat appear. Meaning these two were always watching Anna, from the skies, trees, home and everywhere.
Anna wakes up in a red version of her old apartment. I believe this is hell and after Anna was stabbed in the back and lost so much blood already during birth, I think she died, like Ivy did and was rebirthed and is now in hell with the rest of the witches. The paintings are screaming at her and calling her names, the rooms are coloured blood red and Siobhan even waters a tree with blood. Not very 'Earthly' and they're all satanic.
Siobhan tells Anna that Dex's sperm and Siobhan's eggs were used to create the perfect breed.
We learn that the witches recruit who want to have it all, a career, motherhood and marriage. Exactly what Anna wants.
Siobhan paralysed Anna for going back on the agreement by trying to take the baby back. Anna also notices Siobhan did that to her when she see the blood on Siobhan's nail.
Anna enters a room filled with babies and blood storage containers. In the centre there is a blood/ organ fountain for decoration, its hell, its gonna be fucked.
Siobhan kills Ivy for killing her son. She does it quickly and coldly. This could mean the reason there are so many witches is because she keeps killing them, she doesn't care and neither does anyone else in the cult, they even killed Adeline and probably many before without hesitation. "Will she resurrect?" Talia asks and Siobhan says "she doesn't need to" showing how Siobhan is in control over their lives, she can choose for them to be dead or not.
The lack of babies in the room is because they kill many for experiments, blood for youthfulness and possibly for not being pure enough. Talia's basement had an entire corridor of dead babies.
The demons being made are being built to have strong and super qualities, strength, swiftness, ruthlessness etc. But the ones made made with Siobhan's eggs and Dex's sperm will be the most powerful, charging the army to Earth and killing all men and only keeping a select few as sex slaves to keep repopulating the world. Lilith's ultimate goal, removing the men from the world so women can rule, further proving Siobhan is Lilith.
Before, Siobhan tells Anna "if you hold him (the baby) you join us" and that's exactly what Anna does. She takes the baby and the green heals appear, showing that she now has eternal youth, power and beauty, Siobhan has giving her powers like she did with the other witches.
After a few chats, Anna is left alone, singing the song she once bonded over with her old friend until Adeline appears. They're in hell, the spirit realm, Adeline is now a spirit and finally can connect with Anna while she's alone. She tells her a spell, a spell that banishes the darkness and evil. Adeline couldn't preform the banishing spell before because Siobhan had taken her abilities away from her once she left, but Anna just got her abilities. Siobhan enters the room and they both chant, only Anna is really doing anything, Adeline is just there for encouragement lol. Siobhan is then banished from the room along with the child, not killed, just sent elsewhere. Hestia takes care of the home, so calling upon her and her white protection banished darkness away from your place. Since they were in version of Anna's apartment in hell, Hestia took away the darkness and Anna headed out from hell into a white room blessed by Hestia (or its heaven) where Anna's unborn miscarried child is present. A spider crawls around and Anna picks it up and squashes it, representing her overcoming the darkness and fears and the oppression.
Anna also took Siobhan's hat, symbolising her overpowering her and having the ability the step into a new version of herself, one that has no fear, has power and strength, one that is no longer opressed by anyone and one that has it all, a baby, an Oscar and the powers given to her and a secure safe home for herself and her child.
Also the witches aren't dead because you can hear them all chanting around Anna in the white room.
Also, the mirror cracks the same way it cracked in on of the eariler episodes. My guess is the mirror cracked in the earlier episode from Siobhan and in the last in cracked from Anna, literally mirroring how they have similar power now after Siobhan gave Anna power.
I'm gonna end this with currently the only official statement given to us by the writer of the season.
"The message of course, is not that women should not have it all, but rather woman that "having it all" is not possible within a patriarchy- and that the only way for women to have power is for them to ascribe to the same oppressive systems that have held them back for so long, as they in turn oppress others."