Funny short phrases
Short, Clean, and Funny Jokes
2015.01.03 15:27 appgrad22 Short, Clean, and Funny Jokes
Some may call them "Dad Jokes." Some may call them "Corny Jokes." This is a place for G-rated, short, and funny jokes...perfect for kids and any audience.
2013.06.02 22:46 iams3b Shit duolingo says
There are always funny sentences/phrases in Duolingo; post them here!
2014.07.14 09:47 DranerFox Dog Memes
Dog Memes: Memes, funny posts, and short viral videos about dogs.
2024.05.16 17:42 Unhappy_Performer538 Using The Belt
So I'm sick and I've got a lot of time on my hands so I'm actually watching the latest Influencer Belt episode.
1) this use of the belt is just boring. What makes products slowly traveling down a belt interesting? Nothing lol. The most fun part was when he had to try all three Hot Ones hot sauces and had to keep juggling them and the crackers and moving them over to the left, and even though it was funny, Keith seemed annoyed lol.
Secondly, Keith really doesn't seem like himself. He reminds me of me when I was going through serious shit and just pretending to be a person in front of other people. He seems a little more irritated, his jokes don't really land, he says things that don't even really make a whole lot of sense and doesn't even seem to realize it. I know for me when I had that issue I was really struggling. I'm sure fatherhood is really difficult and I hope he's personally okay.
C) I think they should do something playing off the I Love Lucy chocolate conveyor belt episode. They should have to learn how to make chocolates, and use the conveyor belt, and make it a competition like who can be most accurate, etc. While dressed up like Lucy and Ethel. I know they'd probably say their audience is too young but a short little explanation in the middle of the video would be enough, and the idea would stand on its own.
Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.
submitted by Unhappy_Performer538 to TheTryGuysSnark [link] [comments]
1) this use of the belt is just boring. What makes products slowly traveling down a belt interesting? Nothing lol. The most fun part was when he had to try all three Hot Ones hot sauces and had to keep juggling them and the crackers and moving them over to the left, and even though it was funny, Keith seemed annoyed lol.
Secondly, Keith really doesn't seem like himself. He reminds me of me when I was going through serious shit and just pretending to be a person in front of other people. He seems a little more irritated, his jokes don't really land, he says things that don't even really make a whole lot of sense and doesn't even seem to realize it. I know for me when I had that issue I was really struggling. I'm sure fatherhood is really difficult and I hope he's personally okay.
C) I think they should do something playing off the I Love Lucy chocolate conveyor belt episode. They should have to learn how to make chocolates, and use the conveyor belt, and make it a competition like who can be most accurate, etc. While dressed up like Lucy and Ethel. I know they'd probably say their audience is too young but a short little explanation in the middle of the video would be enough, and the idea would stand on its own.
Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.
2024.05.16 17:37 StafenWasHere Instead of hating c.ai's issues with all our hearts, how about we say what we love about the site?
 | (Image unrelated. I forgor where I got it from) submitted by StafenWasHere to CharacterAI [link] [comments] I tested other sites and apps with ai RP characters, and lemme be real with you, c.ai is far better than most of them. I ran into moments where the ai repeats stuff like crazyy, for example: "They said, their voice filled with concern and worry" and it would repeat that every message just to keep it long as hell. C.ai just makes new responses, even if they are short like "Hi!! A smile appears on their face as they wave at you. I've been looking for you. Where have you been?" Another thing I like is how it catches up with memes. I tried to do the "Buying Clothes at The Soup Store" meme and in 2 or 3 messages, it knew exactly what it was supposed to say. Not only that, but it can be hella funny. I once charter with a Sonic.EXE bot and I made the universe explode. Before dying, I said "I died without getting a gf :(" and the ai responded with "you hear a quiet whisper to your ear...* No B!tches... " Wbu? Anything you like abt c.ai? |
2024.05.16 17:27 Thefierce_deity What're your favorite older FNF mods that you wish got more attention than it did?
Here's mine: FNF VS. Bogus I just really enjoyed this short yet funny as heck fnf Mod The songs were nice, his voice still cracks me up a little bit. And I'm still breathing in the copium for a V2 of this mod
submitted by Thefierce_deity to FridayNightFunkin [link] [comments]
2024.05.16 17:27 Pale_Sheet The Alcott by The National featuring Taylor. Released in April 2023. Why do I feel this song is so Matty coded?
 |
She uses “gold” to describe Matty a lot — “golden tattoo” in dress, “tattooed golden retriever” in TTPD, “gold rush” in gold rush, “golden gates” in long story short, “by the gold clock” in Coney Island (this features the national), “gold was the colour of the leaves” in invisible string, “you painted me golden” in dancing with our hands tied, “it’s like your body is gold” in end game.. I could go on lol
Something about her phrasing … you can hear it even in the original voice note. She’s not coloring it in; she’s fully another character in the story. It makes sense. In the verse, Matt is talking about finding someone and they’re writing in their golden notebook. In a way, I was like, Is that Taylor? Who is it? Or is it some fictional character? She inhabits this story as her own character. That makes it a true feature. (FYI Matt is one of the members of the national, not Matty Healy) |
2024.05.16 17:25 Least_Dot_5 34 [M4R] #online Europe/USA - Rare Late 80's Model Human, Well-Maintained and Upgraded
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Though he may sound a little funny with his unique accent, fear not – he's perfectly understandable. And hey, if you're curious about his history, the registration documents are readily available upon request.
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submitted by Least_Dot_5 to r4r [link] [comments]
This European import comes in a stunning white exterior, free from any visible damage. Trust me, it's a head-turner! Don't worry about missing out on essential features either – this guy still possesses all the original specs, with a couple of bonus upgrades. He underwent vision augmentation and dental alignment during his early years, ensuring an enhanced experience for both parties involved.
Though he may sound a little funny with his unique accent, fear not – he's perfectly understandable. And hey, if you're curious about his history, the registration documents are readily available upon request.
Now, let's talk performance. While he may not be in his prime, he's still in pretty decent shape and has managed to maintain his original dimensions over the years. You're in for a treat with his fuel efficiency – he runs like a champion on caffeine in the mornings, but expect a slightly slower pace in the evenings if his fuel source consists of fried cheese and beer.
To top it off, he's available right now and open to negotiations. Whether you're looking for a long-term commitment or a short-term chat adventure, this import model male human guarantees exceptional response time and aims to exceed your expectations (note: expectations not guaranteed to be exceeded).
So, what are you waiting for? Don't miss out on this rare opportunity to own a piece of late 80's human history! Give me a shout and let's make a deal. Serious inquiries only, please.
2024.05.16 17:24 Least_Dot_5 34M - Rare Late 80's Model Human, Well-Maintained and Upgraded looking for people to chat with!
Hey folks! I've got something special for you today – a one-of-a-kind late 80's model male human, available for all your companionship needs!
This European import comes in a stunning white exterior, free from any visible damage. Trust me, it's a head-turner! Don't worry about missing out on essential features either – this guy still possesses all the original specs, with a couple of bonus upgrades. He underwent vision augmentation and dental alignment during his early years, ensuring an enhanced experience for both parties involved.
Though he may sound a little funny with his unique accent, fear not – he's perfectly understandable. And hey, if you're curious about his history, the registration documents are readily available upon request.
Now, let's talk performance. While he may not be in his prime, he's still in pretty decent shape and has managed to maintain his original dimensions over the years. You're in for a treat with his fuel efficiency – he runs like a champion on caffeine in the mornings, but expect a slightly slower pace in the evenings if his fuel source consists of fried cheese and beer.
To top it off, he's available right now and open to negotiations. Whether you're looking for a long-term commitment or a short-term chat adventure, this import model male human guarantees exceptional response time and aims to exceed your expectations (note: expectations not guaranteed to be exceeded).
So, what are you waiting for? Don't miss out on this rare opportunity to own a piece of late 80's human history! Give me a shout and let's make a deal. Serious inquiries only, please.
submitted by Least_Dot_5 to penpalsover30 [link] [comments]
This European import comes in a stunning white exterior, free from any visible damage. Trust me, it's a head-turner! Don't worry about missing out on essential features either – this guy still possesses all the original specs, with a couple of bonus upgrades. He underwent vision augmentation and dental alignment during his early years, ensuring an enhanced experience for both parties involved.
Though he may sound a little funny with his unique accent, fear not – he's perfectly understandable. And hey, if you're curious about his history, the registration documents are readily available upon request.
Now, let's talk performance. While he may not be in his prime, he's still in pretty decent shape and has managed to maintain his original dimensions over the years. You're in for a treat with his fuel efficiency – he runs like a champion on caffeine in the mornings, but expect a slightly slower pace in the evenings if his fuel source consists of fried cheese and beer.
To top it off, he's available right now and open to negotiations. Whether you're looking for a long-term commitment or a short-term chat adventure, this import model male human guarantees exceptional response time and aims to exceed your expectations (note: expectations not guaranteed to be exceeded).
So, what are you waiting for? Don't miss out on this rare opportunity to own a piece of late 80's human history! Give me a shout and let's make a deal. Serious inquiries only, please.
2024.05.16 17:00 NewHampshireGal I thought he was it for me.
My now ex-boyfriend and I met on Facebook dating in September of 2022. We hit it off like I’ve never done with anyone else. I thought the age difference would be an issue but turns out it’s just a number. We never ever argued. We got along great. We always had a great time together. So many laughs. So much banter. So many jokes. I thought I’d found the one.
I have a history of being abused; physically, mentally, and emotionally. So needless to say being with someone who was so nice and caring to me was foreign territory. Deep down I thought I didn’t deserve it but as time went on I got used to it. I never let my history get in the way of our relationship.
I have always been supportive of him and his dreams, I never judged. I never talked down. I never nagged. I treated him like I wanted to be treated. I was his biggest cheerleader. He always said our relationship was the best he’s ever had.
Fast forward to this past January: I found out I was pregnant. I was shocked because I didn’t think I could get pregnant again. Plus I follow my cycle like a hawk. I waited a couple of days to tell him because I was a pile of nerves.
He didn’t believe me at first. Asked me to see the test then asked if termination was an option. I said absolutely not. He proceeded to tell me he wasn’t ready to be a dad (even though he is very well-off). I said OK. I will handle this on my own. I mean what do you say to that? Not ready to be a dad? Then don’t do things that can lead to a pregnancy.
To my surprise he walked in from work a couple of days later and the first words out of his mouth were “we are done”. I was shocked. Hurt. I didn’t even know how to react. I nearly passed out. He also said “I want you to be the one but you aren’t”. And a bunch of other things I can’t remember right now.
Four days later I ended up in the ER and I miscarried. He was there with me. I didn’t have the strength to drive in the middle of a blizzard. I have never cried so much in my life. I feel like I died inside. He cried with me, held my hand.
We ended up talking and he said he wanted to give us another shot. We “cleared the air” as he put it. I thought we were doing fine. We ended up going to couple’s therapy and I thought we were on the same page.
However, this gut feeling just wouldn’t go away. I thought maybe I was stressed over the loss, over work, over whatever and I was just reading into things that were no big deal to begin with.
No matter how many excuses I made for my feelings, it just wouldn’t go away. It led to many panic attacks, thoughts of ending my life, (yes it was that bad), feeling guilty over the loss of my baby. I was a mess. I thought it was all my fault.
So this Sunday I did something I never thought I’d do: go through his phone. I was not shocked at what I found. He had been sxting this woman whom he went on a date with before we met. Of course he used Snapchat. I loathe that app. I knew about her and it never sat right with me. Up until that point he never gave me a reason not to believe him.
To make a long story short: today I broke up with him. I told him I knew he was lying. He blamed the girl for sending him pictures without him asking. I said “that’s funny because your last message to her was “holy fuck”. Doesn’t sound like someone who is upset to be getting nudes.
In a way he tried to blame me and of course I called him out on his bullshit and said “nah, this is all on you”. There is no excuse for cheating in my eyes. None. Zero. And I refuse to take the blame. None of this is my fault.
He said he didn’t want to hurt me, that we weren’t meant to be, all kinds of bullshit.
My heart is in a million pieces. He was my best friend. He knows my deepest secrets, he is the only person in my life who knows about my past sucdal thoughts (I felt comfortable telling him because he struggled with the same thing as a teen). I felt so loved when I was with him. He was so affectionate all the time. It is something I had never experienced before.
Please please tell me it will be okay. Please give me any advice you can to help me move on from this without losing my sanity?
Tl;dr I need help dealing with the loss my partner and best friend. I never thought this day would come.
submitted by NewHampshireGal to BreakUps [link] [comments]
I have a history of being abused; physically, mentally, and emotionally. So needless to say being with someone who was so nice and caring to me was foreign territory. Deep down I thought I didn’t deserve it but as time went on I got used to it. I never let my history get in the way of our relationship.
I have always been supportive of him and his dreams, I never judged. I never talked down. I never nagged. I treated him like I wanted to be treated. I was his biggest cheerleader. He always said our relationship was the best he’s ever had.
Fast forward to this past January: I found out I was pregnant. I was shocked because I didn’t think I could get pregnant again. Plus I follow my cycle like a hawk. I waited a couple of days to tell him because I was a pile of nerves.
He didn’t believe me at first. Asked me to see the test then asked if termination was an option. I said absolutely not. He proceeded to tell me he wasn’t ready to be a dad (even though he is very well-off). I said OK. I will handle this on my own. I mean what do you say to that? Not ready to be a dad? Then don’t do things that can lead to a pregnancy.
To my surprise he walked in from work a couple of days later and the first words out of his mouth were “we are done”. I was shocked. Hurt. I didn’t even know how to react. I nearly passed out. He also said “I want you to be the one but you aren’t”. And a bunch of other things I can’t remember right now.
Four days later I ended up in the ER and I miscarried. He was there with me. I didn’t have the strength to drive in the middle of a blizzard. I have never cried so much in my life. I feel like I died inside. He cried with me, held my hand.
We ended up talking and he said he wanted to give us another shot. We “cleared the air” as he put it. I thought we were doing fine. We ended up going to couple’s therapy and I thought we were on the same page.
However, this gut feeling just wouldn’t go away. I thought maybe I was stressed over the loss, over work, over whatever and I was just reading into things that were no big deal to begin with.
No matter how many excuses I made for my feelings, it just wouldn’t go away. It led to many panic attacks, thoughts of ending my life, (yes it was that bad), feeling guilty over the loss of my baby. I was a mess. I thought it was all my fault.
So this Sunday I did something I never thought I’d do: go through his phone. I was not shocked at what I found. He had been sxting this woman whom he went on a date with before we met. Of course he used Snapchat. I loathe that app. I knew about her and it never sat right with me. Up until that point he never gave me a reason not to believe him.
To make a long story short: today I broke up with him. I told him I knew he was lying. He blamed the girl for sending him pictures without him asking. I said “that’s funny because your last message to her was “holy fuck”. Doesn’t sound like someone who is upset to be getting nudes.
In a way he tried to blame me and of course I called him out on his bullshit and said “nah, this is all on you”. There is no excuse for cheating in my eyes. None. Zero. And I refuse to take the blame. None of this is my fault.
He said he didn’t want to hurt me, that we weren’t meant to be, all kinds of bullshit.
My heart is in a million pieces. He was my best friend. He knows my deepest secrets, he is the only person in my life who knows about my past sucdal thoughts (I felt comfortable telling him because he struggled with the same thing as a teen). I felt so loved when I was with him. He was so affectionate all the time. It is something I had never experienced before.
Please please tell me it will be okay. Please give me any advice you can to help me move on from this without losing my sanity?
Tl;dr I need help dealing with the loss my partner and best friend. I never thought this day would come.
2024.05.16 16:58 ThisSpinach8060 CMV: Women love sexism and have become abusive or complicit with abuse
The prevailing narrative is that men are the major purveyors and subjugators of sexism.
In my exp however I have seen the opposite (don’t care about the past - only present time in the West).
This isn’t chronic online disease either. I’m a very worldly person, with a ton of experience and very socially skilled. Three parties a ton in my younger days. Never had issues with women.
Something I’ve noticed.
Almost all women use terms like “a real man”.
That’s a sexist phrase. Period. Hello!? Lmao!
Almost NO women police sexism FROM WOMEN. But they’ll police it whenever a man has a sexist expectation/boundary, performs a sexist act or makes a sexist comment.
Women most often define a real man as anything convenient for her. He works, provides, he leads but doesn’t control, he’s physically fit and trained in fighting, handy around the house, can change a tire/oil, he is confident and yet humble, he sounds like a great guy. He is non-violent but very capable of violence, he’s patient with her. I’ve even heard things like “a real man can handle a strong woman (code for disagreeable). A real man can handle me at my worst (code for antisocial). A real man doesn’t body shame. (Women body shame more than anyone on earth).
So what’s a real woman? Apparently that questions inappropriate. Lmao.
A man should pay on dates, be a gentleman etc.
Ok - can we say what a woman should do? Lmao.
Because if I said a real woman doesn’t argue with her man (biblical) you’ll call that sexist. If I said a real woman can cook - sexist. If I said a real woman loves kids…
So on and so forth.
It gets deeper.
Cleavage, leggings and other skin tight clothing, camel toes and free nipples - are all sexually abusive.
No? So I can wear skin tight shorts and display my bulge - man spreading around town? Cuz I gotta bug bulge so go ahead and tell me - theres nothing wrong with it and ppl should stop sexualizing my body.
How is camel toe not insane? Actually? How is being dressed with half your ass cheek hanging out not problematic? And how is being comfortable dressed with that around children not criminal?
“Oh I wear skin tight booty shorts where my ass hangs out and you can see my vagina, my top is cut so low you can see my tits and I’m braless so my nips are on full display. Stop sexualizing my body.”
At some point you’re ok with grooming young boys/ppl to become sexually traumatized. It’s sick!
Society needs to CHECK female privilege before this gets out of hand.
I’m open to being proven wrong. That some how I’m confused.
submitted by ThisSpinach8060 to changemyview [link] [comments]
In my exp however I have seen the opposite (don’t care about the past - only present time in the West).
This isn’t chronic online disease either. I’m a very worldly person, with a ton of experience and very socially skilled. Three parties a ton in my younger days. Never had issues with women.
Something I’ve noticed.
Almost all women use terms like “a real man”.
That’s a sexist phrase. Period. Hello!? Lmao!
Almost NO women police sexism FROM WOMEN. But they’ll police it whenever a man has a sexist expectation/boundary, performs a sexist act or makes a sexist comment.
Women most often define a real man as anything convenient for her. He works, provides, he leads but doesn’t control, he’s physically fit and trained in fighting, handy around the house, can change a tire/oil, he is confident and yet humble, he sounds like a great guy. He is non-violent but very capable of violence, he’s patient with her. I’ve even heard things like “a real man can handle a strong woman (code for disagreeable). A real man can handle me at my worst (code for antisocial). A real man doesn’t body shame. (Women body shame more than anyone on earth).
So what’s a real woman? Apparently that questions inappropriate. Lmao.
A man should pay on dates, be a gentleman etc.
Ok - can we say what a woman should do? Lmao.
Because if I said a real woman doesn’t argue with her man (biblical) you’ll call that sexist. If I said a real woman can cook - sexist. If I said a real woman loves kids…
So on and so forth.
It gets deeper.
Cleavage, leggings and other skin tight clothing, camel toes and free nipples - are all sexually abusive.
No? So I can wear skin tight shorts and display my bulge - man spreading around town? Cuz I gotta bug bulge so go ahead and tell me - theres nothing wrong with it and ppl should stop sexualizing my body.
How is camel toe not insane? Actually? How is being dressed with half your ass cheek hanging out not problematic? And how is being comfortable dressed with that around children not criminal?
“Oh I wear skin tight booty shorts where my ass hangs out and you can see my vagina, my top is cut so low you can see my tits and I’m braless so my nips are on full display. Stop sexualizing my body.”
At some point you’re ok with grooming young boys/ppl to become sexually traumatized. It’s sick!
Society needs to CHECK female privilege before this gets out of hand.
I’m open to being proven wrong. That some how I’m confused.
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Remember to check our Ai Generator: CandyAI
2024.05.16 16:51 113h_tm Mayhem lineup
 | I like how MayheM '88–'91 lineup is 3 short men and Pelle. I think it's funny submitted by 113h_tm to Mayhem [link] [comments] |
2024.05.16 16:45 Impressive-Rice-7801 Funny Short term memory issue
So i have my colonoscopy tomorrow and i am fasting today. I have almost ate like 10 times today! I keep forgetting ALL THE TIME. LOL
My husband knew this would be an issue and has enlisted our 7 year old to remind me. I had to ask my coworkers to basically slap any food out of my hand. I put a sticky note on my computer monitor to remind me too.
My god my short term memory is ridiculous. I used to blame it on the drugs I did in my twenties but sigh it’s just my brain.
submitted by Impressive-Rice-7801 to adhdwomen [link] [comments]
My husband knew this would be an issue and has enlisted our 7 year old to remind me. I had to ask my coworkers to basically slap any food out of my hand. I put a sticky note on my computer monitor to remind me too.
My god my short term memory is ridiculous. I used to blame it on the drugs I did in my twenties but sigh it’s just my brain.
2024.05.16 16:40 CompassWithHat Top Lasgun: Broadsides
FIRST CHAPTER
PREVIOUS CHAPTER
This product is a fanfic of the Sexy Space Babes/Between Worlds product of u/Bluefishcake and one I highly suggest you read. It was created with permission, but give the OG works some love.
Imgr gallery of Comissioned and Fan Artworks
I'm Back Bitches! Again!
//////////
Junior Systems Engineer First Class Che’keero knelt before a semi-sparking control panel and sighed. She, and a large band of her fellow Engineers with Marine support, had boarded the pirate frigate with the singular goal of ensuring that the pirates didn’t scuttle their floating hulk and doom the slaves aboard to a, if they were lucky, a swift death in space.
The problem, of course, came with the pirate’s maintenance schedules and decisions to forgo certain… safety measures when it came to repair.
Like the panel before her. Usually a perfectly functional control system for the reverse-magnetic bulkhead doors that ensured void seals in power outages, some pirate at some point in their dumb, dumb life decided to fix the panel blowing a fuse… by ripping the fuse out and replacing it with a high density power cable. Which meant the entire thing was one massive shock hazard and actively sparking as the reactors deep in the ship flickered and surged due to damage.
Che’keero swore as an arc of electricity flashed towards her face after a tool that was not supposed to be magnetized, cheap dick WaDepth requisitions, caught a magnetic field, fusing the entire system shut and turning the formerly barely functional control system into nothing but pretty, decorative wiring and cheap solder. She punched the now utterly unfunctional control box and toggled on her radio. “Three-Two to Three-Lead, this door’s fried. You’ll need to bring in the cutters if we want to get to the rest of the ship. Might as well also bring in an inflatable airlock, I’m not liking how some of the metal strain sensors are flashing at me.”
A semi-synthetic voice replied back to Che’keero, “Three-Lead copies. I’ll be over there shortly with the stuff. Double check those sensors, I’m not getting the same readings, so let’s make sure something isn’t blocking errors from reaching me.”
“Copy that Three-Lead, Three-Two ou-” Something tapped against the back of her helmet and Junior Systems Engineer First Class Che’keero mentally swore.
“Now, now, lassie, how about you sit right there and don’t move.” A nasally, unfamiliar voice called out to her while tapping what a camera she set up to watch her back revealed to be a laser pistol to Che’keero’s helmet. “I think that you’re going to be our new best friend and way off this dead end ship.”
Che’keero paused, letting the situation settle in her mind, “Wait, what? Are… are you taking me hostage?”
“Yes!” The pirate replied.
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why are you taking me hostage? This won’t work, none of the shuttles are jump capable and if you try anything, you’ll just end up jumped by marines. They specifically train to deal with pirates taking their engineers hostage. If you want to survive, you should just surrender and take the penal colony when it’s offered.” Che’keero mentioned, shrugging and continuing her inspection of the door.
The pirate seemed baffled at the sheer nonchalance of this response, the pistol slowly falling to merely point at her upper back instead of her head, “You… you really aren’t taking this seriously. I’m a pirate! I’ve killed people! I’ve killed boys, and you’re just sitting there like this doesn’t mean anything!”
“I mean… I wouldn’t say that.” Che’keero replied.
“THEN WHAT DO YOU MEAN!” The pirate screamed, the pistol moving away from Che’keero’s body by a fraction of an inch during an angry gesture.
It was at that point, a ceramic alloyed, carbon steel blade punched clean through the back of the pirate’s suit, slicing through their central nervous system and striking with enough force to shatter the faceplate of said pirate’s helmet on the way out. Muscles twitching, the laser pistol fired off randomly, missing Che’keero and slagging a chunk of bulkhead.
“I’m just buying time,” Che’keero replied cheekily.
“You really need to remember to check your cameras,” The semi-synthetic voice of Ventures Forth Bravely Into Great Unknowns commented as the ex-pirate fell to the ground and blue blood dripped from the long blade sprouting from her right arm and a toolbox hanging from her left hand. “This isn’t the first time you have been flanked, and this one wasn’t during training.”
“Look, I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.” Che’keero replied a bit testily.
“I’m sorry…” Ventures Forth prodded.
“I’m sorry, Ma’am.”
“Much better. Right, now what do we see in this- yeah you were right on it being fried.” Ventures Forth gently shoved the Junior Systems Engineer aside and took her place at the control panel. “Do a sweep of the strain systems. I don’t want this section of the ship breaking apart. Feel free to call up our hull patches. We’ve got plenty to share and this might have to be a lifeboat.”
“Aye, ma’am aye,” Che’keero replied with a crisp salute before rushing off to her duty.
Deeper inside the ship, Ventures Forth could hear laser fire, clashing of metal on metal, and cries for help.
The pirate ship was doomed, it was shattered and broken, but it was not destroyed. Not yet. \
And if she had her way, Ventures Forth Bravely Into Great Unknowns would keep it that way.
//////////
Roshal stood still as her steward continued to clean the dark blue and rapidly congealing blood off her armored form. “Comms,” She called out, “Do we have any contact with the shuttle we sent to the station?”
“Negative, ma’am.” The comm officer replied. She wasn’t the same one that was present when Roshal left to fend off the boarders. At the unspoken question, the woman continued “Communication’s Mate Second Class Lev’tal, ma’am. My superior got a concussion when the pirate ship rocked our ship during boarding. Strap snapped, prior damage. I took over.”
Roshal nodded approvingly, “Good initiative. Send a message to the station, see if we can’t rai-”
“Ma’am! Contact!” One of her sensor techs called out, “Belay that, two contacts. First contact, nav point 782 spinward, possible bogey, cruiser weight. Unknown movements. Second contact, nav point 102 coreward, aerospace assets inbound. Small flight. Hard to determine numbers due to damage. No less than two, no more than five.”
“Focus on getting a hard contact on that possible cruiser. Weapons, what is the status of our anti-aerospace.” Roshal demanded, holding her sword arm out for the steward to scrub at a particularly clotted chunk of blood splattered over her wrist.
The weapons officer shook her head, “If we’re lucky, then we’ve got 20% coverage on half our sides. If we’re very lucky, I might be able to bump that number up to 35%. Not going to quote doctrine, but that’s not nearly enough to fend off a flight of Aerospace assets on a strike run, and that’s assuming they don’t hit us on an unprotected flank.”
Roshal nodded once more, “Sound general quarters and get weapons and tactical back online. Tell the damage control parties to not be distracted and focus on critical systems first. Engine room, report. Can you give me maneuvering thrust?”
The nearby ship phone chimed in with a staticy hiss, “Negative, ma’am. The shot we made with the spinal mount tripped breakers up and down the reactor room. This isn’t an engine problem, we need to make sure our reactor doesn’t blow up when we siphon power. Before you ask, emergency power is still flowing and none of their circuits tripped, but that means we’re down to life support, basic systems, and dockyard thrusters. It will take at least 20 to get the reactor in a safe state. If you want 10, send the chaplain down so we have someone praying for good luck. The fact most of our structural engineers are doing an EVA boarding to ensure the pirate ship next to us doesn’t go critical and render the entire exercise moot isn’t helping matters at all.” The engine room replied Roshal bit down a bit of annoyance at the snark, but engineers were always a finicky sort with authority. They were the first to remind uptight officers that while the Captain’s word may be iron law, it was their work that truly moved the ship.
“Confirmed, engine room.” Roshal instead replied. “Chaplains will be arriving shortly. Do what you can and inform me when you’re three minutes out from full power.”
The engine room didn’t even bother replying, just sending over the affirmative light as they got to work. Roshal approved of that. Sometimes, you just had to insult someone in order to get it working right.
“Captain, we have confirmation on contact. He’s an Alliance Karcharidon class Heavy Cruiser on intercept course. Energy readings are spiking… they’re charging their guns, ma’am!”
“Issue a hostile challenge and give me a firing solution with any gun still functional.”
“No response, ma’am. Hostile Karcharidon is increasing speed. Hard contact in 15 minutes.”
Roshal snarled, emotion breaking through her mask. “Of course, the pirates had one more vessel. Helm, fire our maneuvering thrusters, use the pirate hulk as cover. Weapons, get whoever’s left of our Interceptor flight to engage the enemy. Comms, get me in contact with the merchant fleet, tell them to evacuate. We’ll provide cover.”
“Aye ma’am.” The Communications Mate Second Class said with a shiver in her voice. “Sending-”
“Update on Aerospace assets!” Her sensor tech called out.
“Deliver!” Roshal demanded, cutting off the comms officer with a slice of her hand.
“Weapons fire. Definitely less than four contacts. Seems to be two grou- negative, only two contacts remaining- weaponsfire- one contac- IFF received, oh goddesses, IT’S RUNOFF THREE! FRIENDLY AEROSPACE INBOUND!”
//////////
Milk gripped her crash harness hard as Cookie slammed the Interceptor’s fusion torch clean past its safe thrust marker and into the red as g forces crushed her chest. “Last target down.” She reported after Cookie’s final laser burst hit something critical inside the final Aerospace fighter’s frame. “That’s 20 for 20. All enemy bogeys down. All standard munitions are in the black. Static drive is 48%, dump core ejected. All we’ve got left is our ASM and front laser.”
Cookie flashed back an affirmative signal.
“We going for that cruiser?”
Another affirmative.
“Well, I’m braced and ready on the release. Ready.”
“Ready.” Cookie spoke, his voice horse.
It’s funny what people think when their lives are on the line. Because charging towards a fresh enemy Heavy Cruiser, nothing but a single anti-shipping missile worth a damn, no allied support but the faint glimmer in IFF screens of their fellow flight doing the same… all Aoibhinn McDermott could think of was a poem she had read at least a decade ago or more at the Naval Academy.
Half a league, half a league,
Half a league onward,
All in the Valley of Death
Rode the six hundred.
//////////
Ventures Forth Bravely Into Great Unknowns could do nothing but furiously swear as the basic sensor system her engineering team had restored on the thoroughly ventilated secondary command bridge of the pirate hulk revealed an enemy Heavy Cruiser bearing down upon their homeship.
“Weapons are trashed. We cored their reactor, anyway.” One of the tangential engineers reported, “Other teams are calling in. Things are worse where they are. We’ve found the slaves, though, luckily it was one of the few airtight bays. Also, have some more captives, but that really doesn’t matter right now.”
“No shit.” Ventures Forth replied, “Can we do anything?”
The engineer looked back to her, visor depolarizing so the Gearschilde can look into the black and yellow eyes of her Shil coworker.
“Pray.” The woman replied simply.
Ventures Forth Bravely Into Great Unknowns did just that.
//////////
Low chanting filled the engine bay as a small group of priests stood around the engine praying to whichever god that would listen to allow them one more shot. One more fight.
Around them, black handed engineers scurried, ripping out blown fuses and replacing them with soldered in high strength wire. A final measure of desperation. Sparks flew as engineers swore and chaplains prayed, power still remaining in circuits needing to be bled out before bypasses could be installed, turning every bit of solder and every ripped out fuse into a deadly gamble.
Already, someone was lying on the ground, no longer twitching.
They didn’t have time to check on their fallen comrade, the work was too important.
A clock ticked down. Four minutes elapsed.
//////////
Lieutenant Commander Cenywyn swore as she watched Runoff 2 die.
Their single Interceptor had mistimed a maneuver and had been caught dead in the middle of an Anti-Aerospace array, shredded in an instant. The only consolation she could take was that, seeing as the first shot went clean through the cockpit, they didn’t even notice they died.
“Runoff 4, stay in formation.” She ordered over the radio, “We’ll lead you in for the run.”
“Yes ma’am.” The hesitant voice of Junior Flight Lieutenant Griogill replied. She swallowed, “We’re- we’re ready when you are.”
“No fear, Lieutenant,” Cenywyn called back to the child she was leading to her death. “We’re pilots in the Imperial Patrol. We do our duty. No fear.”
A clock ticked down. Six minutes elapsed.
//////////
“Talk to me!” The last remaining senior engineer in the reactor bay called out to anyone who was able to reply.
Someone, she didn’t even bother looking to see who, called back “We’ve bypassed 60% of the fuses. Should be able to give ourselves a burst of combat power. No more than 10 minutes of it before the entire system overheats and we either die, or the reactor shuts off.”
“Any chance we can get more than 10 minutes?”
“Not before that Heavy Cruiser delivers us straight to the stars.”
“Fuck it, good enough.” She slammed her fist on the ship phone’s dialing button resting near the console the engineer had just ripped the last safety override out of. “Captain. We’ve got your power. You give us the word, and we’ll give you ten minutes.”
//////////
Roshal breathed in, breathed out, and nodded. 10 minutes of combat power before the entire ship shut down into uselessness. She’d done more with less. She couldn’t remember when, but she had. Luckily, this was a Patrol Carrier instead of a standard ship, so it was more than capable of combat maneuvers with nothing but RCS thrusters. That should give her some time.
Movement, movement was going to be the key.
“Comms, tell the engineering crews on the hulk that they are ordered to figure out anything that could draw the attention of the Heavy Cruiser,” She began, “Systems, break our mooring lines. We’re going to have to split from the hulk. Helm, prepare for maneuvers. RCS only. We are going to have to do this carefully. Engineroom, prepare for power activation, but hold until my command.”
This needs to be perfect, Roshal thought, A single mistimed action ruins it all.
A clock ticked down. Ten minutes elapsed. The Karcharidon had entered maximum weapon’s range.
//////////
He of Slender Tail shivered where he stood. The secondary command bridge was silent as Roshal began giving orders to fight. This was… this was insane.
They were in a ruined ship with nothing but a merchant fleet beginning to flee and a three thirds dead pirate hulk on their side against a fresh Karcharidon class Heavy Cruiser.
They couldn’t win.
This was suicide.
They would die here.
\ So why didn’t He of Slender Tail feel afraid?
He stood at his post, a secondary bridge console where he would relay orders to other departments, freeing up the other Watchkeeper to collate those orders, there was nothing he could do to help win this impossible battle, and yet…
And yet he felt heat blossoming inside his chest with every single order delivered.
“Mooring teamsss, you are to cut your linesss immediately.” He relayed to a crew of Shil scurrying around the ruined bulkheads, “Damage control, prepare for electrical firesss and arcsss.” He commanded, switching between teams instantly.
He didn’t feel fear. He could see his Watchkeeper shiver every time the sensors reported the enemy contact was still closing, but he didn’t feel the same.
What he felt… was indignation.
How dare this pirate scum threaten his vessel, his crew. How dare they ambush this valiant ship after they had fought so hard to win. How dare they.
He let his fangs fold out as he spat the next order, “Anti-Aerossspace teamsss, prepare your batteriesss for grouped fire. Gunnery calculationsss are on their way.”
How dare they stand up to him.
A clock ticked down. 12 minutes elapsed. Weapons fire.
//////////
Roshal swayed slightly as she could feel the ship beneath her feet move. Movement is life in naval warfare, movement is death. “Right RCS fire, bring us clear of the hulk. Bow thrusters, up twenty.”
“Aye, ma’am, aye, right standard and bow up twenty.” The Helmswoman replied.
“Confirmed. Next maneuver, give us rear thrust-”
“Torpedo!” The sensor operator called out in a shrill voice, “Two marks on intercept course! Range, twelve K and closing fast!”
“Decorum!” Roshal snapped at the panicking sensor technician. “Comms, order Runoff flight to divert and intercept those torpedoes. Rear RCS to full, give us momentum.”
Roshal turned away from the bridge as affirmations were shouted, and the ship began to move, “Engineering, prepare to activate combat power on my mark and prepare for hard maneuvers. Mark in five.”
//////////
Griogill swallowed bile and tried not to feel too thankful that the enemy vessel had fired torpedoes at their home ship. Being diverted from an attack run had a much higher chance of survival than striking through an AA bubble.
“Runoff 4 engaging far torpedo. Moving in for intercept. Bre’kas, give me lock.”
Griogill’s backseater muttered something, and a target lock appeared on the far torpedo as Runoff 1, their previous Drill Sergeants, dashed by in a hard burn and blazed away at their own target.
“Right. We can do this. We can do this. No fear.” The rookie muttered as the sight of her friends in Runoff 3 being turned to vapor echoed in her mind. “I can do this.”
The target locked. She fired. The torpedo detonated.
A clock ticked down.
//////////
“Mark in four.”
//////////
The Heavy Cruiser loomed closer as the comparatively tiny Patrol Carrier spat its defiance in the form of two Interceptors dancing between the stars.
As a pair of torpedoes detonated, four more were launched, the anti-shipping weapons built for this specific purpose. Destroying disabled vessels.
And so the last two remaining Interceptors on CAP dove into the fray, risking themselves against an ever approaching AA bubble in order to save their ship.
A clock ticked down.
//////////
“Mark in three.”
//////////
All Cookie could do was stare and push his meager aerospace fighter further on its nuclear thrusters as shimmering dots of torpedoes lanced out from the Heavy Cruiser attacking his new home.
He pushed his hand forward and felt the throttle once more push back against him, the lever pushed all the way past safe thrust and into the further setting on his console.
The Interceptor was fast. It didn’t feel fast enough.
And so he spoke the words he spoke once before, back when he’d had to listen to his backseater’s screams of pain and the rush of wind after shrapnel pierced his fuselage, and the hospital was so, so far away.
Father, I pray that you will not hide your face from me. Whenever I pray, Lord please hear me and answer me speedily in Jesus' name. God, I pray that you will grant me speed through your help.
A clock ticked down.
//////////
“Mark in two.”
//////////
The Heavy Cruiser shifted, engine flaring and it began to close the range. A single disabled ship on emergency RCS thrusters and a pair of Aerospace fighters was nothing it would have to deal with.
It fired a third spread of torpedoes.
A clock ticked down.
//////////
They took the bait. Roshal thought with a vicious grin.
“Mark in one.” She paused, “Execute.”
In an instant, power flowed through the ship, emergency lights flickered off as the burning red boarding lights returned their fiery glow. The entire ship shook as the main thruster came back online, and capacitors began to charge for maneuvers.
“Hard burn, full thrusters, right, on my mark.” Roshal watched as the Heavy Cruiser began to react to her movements, the enemy ship was alive, you needed to roll to broadsides to begin bombardment, come on come on…
Roshal watched as a torpedo flickered out of existence, Runoff 4 gaining another kill.
Come on, dammit, you don’t get put in charge of a Heavy Cruiser without- THERE!
The Heavy Cruiser flinched, turning her bow away from the no longer stricken vessel, preparing for broadside.
The Captain’s grin showed more teeth than smile. “Execute! Full right thrust!”
“Full right thrust! Aye ma’am aye!” Her helmswoman called out as maneuvering thrusters dead cold roared to life and physically threw the vessel to the side, causing everyone not strapped in on the bridge to rock as a barrage of fire flew past their former location, manual targeting systems in play since the automatic systems would still be getting warmed up.
“Full thrust forward, prepare to divert all power to secondary weapons. Weapons, give me a firing solution.” Roshal commanded, hand raised and pointed at the enemy’s display as if she were commanding from a tall ship.
A chant of “Aye ma’am aye” flowed out across the bridge as the weaponsmistress was silent before calling out. “Port side is up to 45% secondary fires and 32% point defense. That’ll be our best bet.”
Roshal nodded. “Make it so. Target their main weapons. Helm, get us that facing.”
“Ma’am. We’re getting a call from Runoff 3. They are entering the AO and are asking for a target.”
Roshal smiled, “Weapons, shift target. Aim for the anti-aerospace systems. Let’s give Runoff 3 the opening they need.”
A clock ticked down.
//////////
“Cookie, we’ve got a targeting path.” Milk called forward. “Putting it up on your HUD.”
“One second… I’ve got it. Moving to comply. Did the Captain give us a plan?” her front seater replied, causing her stomach to do funny things as the Aerospace Fighter maneuvered while under high thrust.
“Something like that. She asked for a munitions report and specifically about our anti-shipping weapon.”
Cookie paused.
“Ah.” He finally said.
“Yeah.” She replied.
“Well, let’s hope they’re able to open us up to a window of opportunity. Or this will be a short charge.”
“Not our place to question why.”
“Just our place to do and die.”
Time to target… three minutes.
Into the valley of Death, rode the six hundred.
A clock ticked down.
//////////
Two vessels, three Aerospace fighters, one chance.
Six minutes of power remained. All actors took their places on the stage.
One hundred kilometers, close enough to check the weld quality of hull seams, the two ships danced across from each other. Maneuvering.
Five minutes of power remained.
The Karcharidon Heavy Cruiser rolled itself trying to keep the vulnerable top deck away from the Patrol Carrier’s presumably still working main gun as Roshal’s vessel jumped to the side. Thrusters roared.
Four minutes of power remained.
Runoff 1 and 4 shot towards their formerly separated comrade, forming up behind them in a wedge. The trio climbed towards the sun as their captain continued to chase and harass the Karcharidon.
Three minutes of power remained.
Roshal spoke. The lances of her vessel fired. Laser blasts carved across the hull of the enemy ship as it rolled.
The rolling ceased. A helmswoman swore as a full broadside caught the Patrol Carrier in the flank. The port hangar pod was ruined, armor shattered and all inside exposed to hard vacuum. Those who could scream died the fastest. The Interceptors had their opening.
Two minutes of power remained.
Silent wings swept through vacuum as three Interceptors began their dive, their formerly speedy arrowhead shape giving way to an inverted t as their wings swept out for stability, the ASF dove and dove and dove.
Five Kilometers away.
The range was too wide. They had one shot. It had to be perfect.
One minute of power remained.
The Into Harm’s Way spat its defiance into the world, limited power drained to give her pilots a seconds more of time.
30 seconds of power remained.
Three Kilometers.
Hard Lock! Milk shouted from the back seat of Runoff 3. Cookie was silent. The range was still too wide.
15 seconds of power remained.
Two Kilometers.
The Karcharidon seemingly began to roll before the Patrol Carrier once more fired, its last remaining weapons spouting their defiance against the world. Deep in engineering, systems began to blow, wires that replaced fuses sparked power and delicate circuit boards shorted out into useless scrap.
The lights went out.
No power remained.
Roshal, in her head, began to count down as lances of light began to sweep across her ship. Damage control did what they could, but the beams began to cut like an overly enthusiastic shipbreaker.
Five.
One Kilometer.
Four.
Cookie’s thumb depressed the firing stud as the Interceptor screamed at him.
Three.
The ASF launched its deadly payload.
Two.
Three Interceptors pulled back hard on their sticks to avoid colliding with the deck.
One.
The thruster of the anti-shipping missile roared as it rocketed the point blank aerospace distance to target.
Impact.
The armor piercing tip of the missile punched into the upper deck plating of the Heavy Cruiser, classified alloys allowing it to pierce into the armored plating just enough to allow the shaped charge to open up a hole as momentum kept the weapon moving.
Within the frame of a single second, the warhead of the missile had entered the ship and, before the alarms even had time to sound, detonated.
A new sun appeared in the void for a split second as a plasma-fusion warhead detonated inside the Karcharidon heavy cruiser’s hull.
//////////
Roshal allowed herself to breathe a sigh of relief inside her head as the emergency power lights flickered overhead and the gravity ever so slightly lightened. What was left of their sensor arrays showed the enemy vessel powering down. “Engineering. Good work, your 10 minutes were just what she needed.” She called out, picking up the ship phone.
There was no answer from engineering.
She signed externally before pointing at one of the marines guarding the bridge, “Find a crewmate in a void suit. I have need of runners.” The marine clasped a fist to her chest before leaving to execute her captain’s commands. “Comms, do we have any contact with the engineering teams on the pirate hulk?”
The Comms officer held up a hand, Roshal waited, “No, ma’am. We aren’t getting- wait. We’ve got visual on flashing lights from the hull. Apparently, something shorted, so they’re having to rebuild broadcast arrays. They can receive just fine, though.”
“Good, once we can maneuver, bring us broadside of them. What’s the status of the merchant fleet?”
Navigation spoke up now, “Still heading for the Jump Point. Should we send the recall order?”
“Not yet, we are still unsure if the area is safe. If we have any sensors remaining, begin sca-”
The mentioned sensor technician interrupted Captain Roshal, “Ma’am, new contact, signature unknown. Just jumped in from outside the starlane!”
“Give me details. Course, range, and speed?” She demanded.
“Signal confused, can’t get a lock!” Navigation called out, “Can’t tell if confusion’s from them or us.”
Not another one… Roshal sighed, “All forces prepa-”
“Ma’am, we’re being hailed.” Communications called out.
“On squawk.”
“This is Captain Al’yosha Cal’rada of Her Imperial Majesty’s Ship Spear of the Knyaginya, responding to Merchant vessel distress calls. Imperial Patrol Carrier, are you in need of assistance at this time?”
Roshal recognized the voice. A junior officer from her days in the Navy and a fellow Sevastutavan. The memory of the fresh faced girl when she’d joined her as an Ensign straight of the Naval Academy flashed before her eyes. “Captain Cal’rada. Your timing is impeccable as always.”
“Admiral?” Roshal could hear the shock in her old protege’s voice.
“That’s Captain, now, Al’yosha. I require your aid in ensuring the disabled vessel still glowing from an ASM strike remains disabled along with Search and Rescue teams for our sister Carrier.
“Whatever you want, you’ll have it, Admiral_… Helm! All ahead flank and plot course to intercept. Launch gunships and prepare to deploy Bluejackets. We’ll test our _Orcas’ teeth today!”
The line cut out a moment later than it should have, and Roshal nodded in approval.
“Captain, I still don’t have a read on new contact. What is it?” Sensors asked.
“A Drep’na inspired vision, come to life.” Roshal watched, feeling an odd sort of parental pride as Al’yosha’s experimental warship began closing the distance towards the Karcharidon at breakneck speeds. “A swift sailing vessel and ten carriage guns…” Roshal murmured the line from an old Vaasconian poem from the ancient Age of Sail. She had heard Cal’rada had succeeded in petitioning the Navy to build her dream-ship, burning every favor and passing out favors to any and everyone to see the program through. Now, there she was, standing on the bridge bearing down on a ship twice her size, but if the rumors were true, only half her guns.
“Ma’am, contact is still not resolving, but IFF confirms Imperial Navy designation. An Akula Class Attack Transport. I’ve… I’ve never even heard of this class.”
“Perhaps we shall hear of them more in the future. Fortune favors the active.”
“Contact is disgorging multiple signals, moving at speeds consistent with aerospace assets.”
“That is our signal we may disengage. Comms, inform the merchant fleet that the area is secure and to begin refueling procedures. Helm, get us alongside the pirate hulk, we have people to recover. Marine, get me a runner to the MP’s, we shall need the port hangar prepared for an old tradition the Navy has regarding pirate prisoners…” Roshal commanded. The fight was over, it was time to begin the cleanup.
//////////
So… that took a while. Sorry about that.
Turns out when a combination of writer’s block, decision paralysis and LIFE hits you over the head, it becomes a touch difficult to get your shit together long enough to write something down.
On the plus side, we are out of the “unplanned bits” and right back into the parts I have brainstormed, so I won’t be staring at a screen trying to think how to make things connect as much anymore. On the other hand, that means we are now entering the epilogue of book 1 of Top Lasgun.
Don’t worry, the story isn’t ending, I’ve got “three” books plotted out in my head, so we’ll see how that shakes out, but for the most part, this is where I start wrapping up plot threads, laying down threads for what comes next, and all that other good stuff.
So yeah, next chapter is going to involve everyone wrapping up what happened here, some fun little Military Justice, and potentially a bunch of plot. Also, I’m planning on starting a “rewrite”/edited version of this to go up on AO3, so keep an eye out for that. Early installment weirdness is a bitch and I’m not proud of what the older stuff looked like.
Well, I hope you have a wonderful morning, afternoon or evening whenever you read this and I will see you next chapter.
[NEXT CHAPTER]
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PREVIOUS CHAPTER
This product is a fanfic of the Sexy Space Babes/Between Worlds product of u/Bluefishcake and one I highly suggest you read. It was created with permission, but give the OG works some love.
Imgr gallery of Comissioned and Fan Artworks
I'm Back Bitches! Again!
//////////
Junior Systems Engineer First Class Che’keero knelt before a semi-sparking control panel and sighed. She, and a large band of her fellow Engineers with Marine support, had boarded the pirate frigate with the singular goal of ensuring that the pirates didn’t scuttle their floating hulk and doom the slaves aboard to a, if they were lucky, a swift death in space.
The problem, of course, came with the pirate’s maintenance schedules and decisions to forgo certain… safety measures when it came to repair.
Like the panel before her. Usually a perfectly functional control system for the reverse-magnetic bulkhead doors that ensured void seals in power outages, some pirate at some point in their dumb, dumb life decided to fix the panel blowing a fuse… by ripping the fuse out and replacing it with a high density power cable. Which meant the entire thing was one massive shock hazard and actively sparking as the reactors deep in the ship flickered and surged due to damage.
Che’keero swore as an arc of electricity flashed towards her face after a tool that was not supposed to be magnetized, cheap dick WaDepth requisitions, caught a magnetic field, fusing the entire system shut and turning the formerly barely functional control system into nothing but pretty, decorative wiring and cheap solder. She punched the now utterly unfunctional control box and toggled on her radio. “Three-Two to Three-Lead, this door’s fried. You’ll need to bring in the cutters if we want to get to the rest of the ship. Might as well also bring in an inflatable airlock, I’m not liking how some of the metal strain sensors are flashing at me.”
A semi-synthetic voice replied back to Che’keero, “Three-Lead copies. I’ll be over there shortly with the stuff. Double check those sensors, I’m not getting the same readings, so let’s make sure something isn’t blocking errors from reaching me.”
“Copy that Three-Lead, Three-Two ou-” Something tapped against the back of her helmet and Junior Systems Engineer First Class Che’keero mentally swore.
“Now, now, lassie, how about you sit right there and don’t move.” A nasally, unfamiliar voice called out to her while tapping what a camera she set up to watch her back revealed to be a laser pistol to Che’keero’s helmet. “I think that you’re going to be our new best friend and way off this dead end ship.”
Che’keero paused, letting the situation settle in her mind, “Wait, what? Are… are you taking me hostage?”
“Yes!” The pirate replied.
“Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why are you taking me hostage? This won’t work, none of the shuttles are jump capable and if you try anything, you’ll just end up jumped by marines. They specifically train to deal with pirates taking their engineers hostage. If you want to survive, you should just surrender and take the penal colony when it’s offered.” Che’keero mentioned, shrugging and continuing her inspection of the door.
The pirate seemed baffled at the sheer nonchalance of this response, the pistol slowly falling to merely point at her upper back instead of her head, “You… you really aren’t taking this seriously. I’m a pirate! I’ve killed people! I’ve killed boys, and you’re just sitting there like this doesn’t mean anything!”
“I mean… I wouldn’t say that.” Che’keero replied.
“THEN WHAT DO YOU MEAN!” The pirate screamed, the pistol moving away from Che’keero’s body by a fraction of an inch during an angry gesture.
It was at that point, a ceramic alloyed, carbon steel blade punched clean through the back of the pirate’s suit, slicing through their central nervous system and striking with enough force to shatter the faceplate of said pirate’s helmet on the way out. Muscles twitching, the laser pistol fired off randomly, missing Che’keero and slagging a chunk of bulkhead.
“I’m just buying time,” Che’keero replied cheekily.
“You really need to remember to check your cameras,” The semi-synthetic voice of Ventures Forth Bravely Into Great Unknowns commented as the ex-pirate fell to the ground and blue blood dripped from the long blade sprouting from her right arm and a toolbox hanging from her left hand. “This isn’t the first time you have been flanked, and this one wasn’t during training.”
“Look, I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.” Che’keero replied a bit testily.
“I’m sorry…” Ventures Forth prodded.
“I’m sorry, Ma’am.”
“Much better. Right, now what do we see in this- yeah you were right on it being fried.” Ventures Forth gently shoved the Junior Systems Engineer aside and took her place at the control panel. “Do a sweep of the strain systems. I don’t want this section of the ship breaking apart. Feel free to call up our hull patches. We’ve got plenty to share and this might have to be a lifeboat.”
“Aye, ma’am aye,” Che’keero replied with a crisp salute before rushing off to her duty.
Deeper inside the ship, Ventures Forth could hear laser fire, clashing of metal on metal, and cries for help.
The pirate ship was doomed, it was shattered and broken, but it was not destroyed. Not yet. \
And if she had her way, Ventures Forth Bravely Into Great Unknowns would keep it that way.
//////////
Roshal stood still as her steward continued to clean the dark blue and rapidly congealing blood off her armored form. “Comms,” She called out, “Do we have any contact with the shuttle we sent to the station?”
“Negative, ma’am.” The comm officer replied. She wasn’t the same one that was present when Roshal left to fend off the boarders. At the unspoken question, the woman continued “Communication’s Mate Second Class Lev’tal, ma’am. My superior got a concussion when the pirate ship rocked our ship during boarding. Strap snapped, prior damage. I took over.”
Roshal nodded approvingly, “Good initiative. Send a message to the station, see if we can’t rai-”
“Ma’am! Contact!” One of her sensor techs called out, “Belay that, two contacts. First contact, nav point 782 spinward, possible bogey, cruiser weight. Unknown movements. Second contact, nav point 102 coreward, aerospace assets inbound. Small flight. Hard to determine numbers due to damage. No less than two, no more than five.”
“Focus on getting a hard contact on that possible cruiser. Weapons, what is the status of our anti-aerospace.” Roshal demanded, holding her sword arm out for the steward to scrub at a particularly clotted chunk of blood splattered over her wrist.
The weapons officer shook her head, “If we’re lucky, then we’ve got 20% coverage on half our sides. If we’re very lucky, I might be able to bump that number up to 35%. Not going to quote doctrine, but that’s not nearly enough to fend off a flight of Aerospace assets on a strike run, and that’s assuming they don’t hit us on an unprotected flank.”
Roshal nodded once more, “Sound general quarters and get weapons and tactical back online. Tell the damage control parties to not be distracted and focus on critical systems first. Engine room, report. Can you give me maneuvering thrust?”
The nearby ship phone chimed in with a staticy hiss, “Negative, ma’am. The shot we made with the spinal mount tripped breakers up and down the reactor room. This isn’t an engine problem, we need to make sure our reactor doesn’t blow up when we siphon power. Before you ask, emergency power is still flowing and none of their circuits tripped, but that means we’re down to life support, basic systems, and dockyard thrusters. It will take at least 20 to get the reactor in a safe state. If you want 10, send the chaplain down so we have someone praying for good luck. The fact most of our structural engineers are doing an EVA boarding to ensure the pirate ship next to us doesn’t go critical and render the entire exercise moot isn’t helping matters at all.” The engine room replied Roshal bit down a bit of annoyance at the snark, but engineers were always a finicky sort with authority. They were the first to remind uptight officers that while the Captain’s word may be iron law, it was their work that truly moved the ship.
“Confirmed, engine room.” Roshal instead replied. “Chaplains will be arriving shortly. Do what you can and inform me when you’re three minutes out from full power.”
The engine room didn’t even bother replying, just sending over the affirmative light as they got to work. Roshal approved of that. Sometimes, you just had to insult someone in order to get it working right.
“Captain, we have confirmation on contact. He’s an Alliance Karcharidon class Heavy Cruiser on intercept course. Energy readings are spiking… they’re charging their guns, ma’am!”
“Issue a hostile challenge and give me a firing solution with any gun still functional.”
“No response, ma’am. Hostile Karcharidon is increasing speed. Hard contact in 15 minutes.”
Roshal snarled, emotion breaking through her mask. “Of course, the pirates had one more vessel. Helm, fire our maneuvering thrusters, use the pirate hulk as cover. Weapons, get whoever’s left of our Interceptor flight to engage the enemy. Comms, get me in contact with the merchant fleet, tell them to evacuate. We’ll provide cover.”
“Aye ma’am.” The Communications Mate Second Class said with a shiver in her voice. “Sending-”
“Update on Aerospace assets!” Her sensor tech called out.
“Deliver!” Roshal demanded, cutting off the comms officer with a slice of her hand.
“Weapons fire. Definitely less than four contacts. Seems to be two grou- negative, only two contacts remaining- weaponsfire- one contac- IFF received, oh goddesses, IT’S RUNOFF THREE! FRIENDLY AEROSPACE INBOUND!”
//////////
Milk gripped her crash harness hard as Cookie slammed the Interceptor’s fusion torch clean past its safe thrust marker and into the red as g forces crushed her chest. “Last target down.” She reported after Cookie’s final laser burst hit something critical inside the final Aerospace fighter’s frame. “That’s 20 for 20. All enemy bogeys down. All standard munitions are in the black. Static drive is 48%, dump core ejected. All we’ve got left is our ASM and front laser.”
Cookie flashed back an affirmative signal.
“We going for that cruiser?”
Another affirmative.
“Well, I’m braced and ready on the release. Ready.”
“Ready.” Cookie spoke, his voice horse.
It’s funny what people think when their lives are on the line. Because charging towards a fresh enemy Heavy Cruiser, nothing but a single anti-shipping missile worth a damn, no allied support but the faint glimmer in IFF screens of their fellow flight doing the same… all Aoibhinn McDermott could think of was a poem she had read at least a decade ago or more at the Naval Academy.
Half a league, half a league,
Half a league onward,
All in the Valley of Death
Rode the six hundred.
//////////
Ventures Forth Bravely Into Great Unknowns could do nothing but furiously swear as the basic sensor system her engineering team had restored on the thoroughly ventilated secondary command bridge of the pirate hulk revealed an enemy Heavy Cruiser bearing down upon their homeship.
“Weapons are trashed. We cored their reactor, anyway.” One of the tangential engineers reported, “Other teams are calling in. Things are worse where they are. We’ve found the slaves, though, luckily it was one of the few airtight bays. Also, have some more captives, but that really doesn’t matter right now.”
“No shit.” Ventures Forth replied, “Can we do anything?”
The engineer looked back to her, visor depolarizing so the Gearschilde can look into the black and yellow eyes of her Shil coworker.
“Pray.” The woman replied simply.
Ventures Forth Bravely Into Great Unknowns did just that.
//////////
Low chanting filled the engine bay as a small group of priests stood around the engine praying to whichever god that would listen to allow them one more shot. One more fight.
Around them, black handed engineers scurried, ripping out blown fuses and replacing them with soldered in high strength wire. A final measure of desperation. Sparks flew as engineers swore and chaplains prayed, power still remaining in circuits needing to be bled out before bypasses could be installed, turning every bit of solder and every ripped out fuse into a deadly gamble.
Already, someone was lying on the ground, no longer twitching.
They didn’t have time to check on their fallen comrade, the work was too important.
A clock ticked down. Four minutes elapsed.
//////////
Lieutenant Commander Cenywyn swore as she watched Runoff 2 die.
Their single Interceptor had mistimed a maneuver and had been caught dead in the middle of an Anti-Aerospace array, shredded in an instant. The only consolation she could take was that, seeing as the first shot went clean through the cockpit, they didn’t even notice they died.
“Runoff 4, stay in formation.” She ordered over the radio, “We’ll lead you in for the run.”
“Yes ma’am.” The hesitant voice of Junior Flight Lieutenant Griogill replied. She swallowed, “We’re- we’re ready when you are.”
“No fear, Lieutenant,” Cenywyn called back to the child she was leading to her death. “We’re pilots in the Imperial Patrol. We do our duty. No fear.”
A clock ticked down. Six minutes elapsed.
//////////
“Talk to me!” The last remaining senior engineer in the reactor bay called out to anyone who was able to reply.
Someone, she didn’t even bother looking to see who, called back “We’ve bypassed 60% of the fuses. Should be able to give ourselves a burst of combat power. No more than 10 minutes of it before the entire system overheats and we either die, or the reactor shuts off.”
“Any chance we can get more than 10 minutes?”
“Not before that Heavy Cruiser delivers us straight to the stars.”
“Fuck it, good enough.” She slammed her fist on the ship phone’s dialing button resting near the console the engineer had just ripped the last safety override out of. “Captain. We’ve got your power. You give us the word, and we’ll give you ten minutes.”
//////////
Roshal breathed in, breathed out, and nodded. 10 minutes of combat power before the entire ship shut down into uselessness. She’d done more with less. She couldn’t remember when, but she had. Luckily, this was a Patrol Carrier instead of a standard ship, so it was more than capable of combat maneuvers with nothing but RCS thrusters. That should give her some time.
Movement, movement was going to be the key.
“Comms, tell the engineering crews on the hulk that they are ordered to figure out anything that could draw the attention of the Heavy Cruiser,” She began, “Systems, break our mooring lines. We’re going to have to split from the hulk. Helm, prepare for maneuvers. RCS only. We are going to have to do this carefully. Engineroom, prepare for power activation, but hold until my command.”
This needs to be perfect, Roshal thought, A single mistimed action ruins it all.
A clock ticked down. Ten minutes elapsed. The Karcharidon had entered maximum weapon’s range.
//////////
He of Slender Tail shivered where he stood. The secondary command bridge was silent as Roshal began giving orders to fight. This was… this was insane.
They were in a ruined ship with nothing but a merchant fleet beginning to flee and a three thirds dead pirate hulk on their side against a fresh Karcharidon class Heavy Cruiser.
They couldn’t win.
This was suicide.
They would die here.
\ So why didn’t He of Slender Tail feel afraid?
He stood at his post, a secondary bridge console where he would relay orders to other departments, freeing up the other Watchkeeper to collate those orders, there was nothing he could do to help win this impossible battle, and yet…
And yet he felt heat blossoming inside his chest with every single order delivered.
“Mooring teamsss, you are to cut your linesss immediately.” He relayed to a crew of Shil scurrying around the ruined bulkheads, “Damage control, prepare for electrical firesss and arcsss.” He commanded, switching between teams instantly.
He didn’t feel fear. He could see his Watchkeeper shiver every time the sensors reported the enemy contact was still closing, but he didn’t feel the same.
What he felt… was indignation.
How dare this pirate scum threaten his vessel, his crew. How dare they ambush this valiant ship after they had fought so hard to win. How dare they.
He let his fangs fold out as he spat the next order, “Anti-Aerossspace teamsss, prepare your batteriesss for grouped fire. Gunnery calculationsss are on their way.”
How dare they stand up to him.
A clock ticked down. 12 minutes elapsed. Weapons fire.
//////////
Roshal swayed slightly as she could feel the ship beneath her feet move. Movement is life in naval warfare, movement is death. “Right RCS fire, bring us clear of the hulk. Bow thrusters, up twenty.”
“Aye, ma’am, aye, right standard and bow up twenty.” The Helmswoman replied.
“Confirmed. Next maneuver, give us rear thrust-”
“Torpedo!” The sensor operator called out in a shrill voice, “Two marks on intercept course! Range, twelve K and closing fast!”
“Decorum!” Roshal snapped at the panicking sensor technician. “Comms, order Runoff flight to divert and intercept those torpedoes. Rear RCS to full, give us momentum.”
Roshal turned away from the bridge as affirmations were shouted, and the ship began to move, “Engineering, prepare to activate combat power on my mark and prepare for hard maneuvers. Mark in five.”
//////////
Griogill swallowed bile and tried not to feel too thankful that the enemy vessel had fired torpedoes at their home ship. Being diverted from an attack run had a much higher chance of survival than striking through an AA bubble.
“Runoff 4 engaging far torpedo. Moving in for intercept. Bre’kas, give me lock.”
Griogill’s backseater muttered something, and a target lock appeared on the far torpedo as Runoff 1, their previous Drill Sergeants, dashed by in a hard burn and blazed away at their own target.
“Right. We can do this. We can do this. No fear.” The rookie muttered as the sight of her friends in Runoff 3 being turned to vapor echoed in her mind. “I can do this.”
The target locked. She fired. The torpedo detonated.
A clock ticked down.
//////////
“Mark in four.”
//////////
The Heavy Cruiser loomed closer as the comparatively tiny Patrol Carrier spat its defiance in the form of two Interceptors dancing between the stars.
As a pair of torpedoes detonated, four more were launched, the anti-shipping weapons built for this specific purpose. Destroying disabled vessels.
And so the last two remaining Interceptors on CAP dove into the fray, risking themselves against an ever approaching AA bubble in order to save their ship.
A clock ticked down.
//////////
“Mark in three.”
//////////
All Cookie could do was stare and push his meager aerospace fighter further on its nuclear thrusters as shimmering dots of torpedoes lanced out from the Heavy Cruiser attacking his new home.
He pushed his hand forward and felt the throttle once more push back against him, the lever pushed all the way past safe thrust and into the further setting on his console.
The Interceptor was fast. It didn’t feel fast enough.
And so he spoke the words he spoke once before, back when he’d had to listen to his backseater’s screams of pain and the rush of wind after shrapnel pierced his fuselage, and the hospital was so, so far away.
Father, I pray that you will not hide your face from me. Whenever I pray, Lord please hear me and answer me speedily in Jesus' name. God, I pray that you will grant me speed through your help.
A clock ticked down.
//////////
“Mark in two.”
//////////
The Heavy Cruiser shifted, engine flaring and it began to close the range. A single disabled ship on emergency RCS thrusters and a pair of Aerospace fighters was nothing it would have to deal with.
It fired a third spread of torpedoes.
A clock ticked down.
//////////
They took the bait. Roshal thought with a vicious grin.
“Mark in one.” She paused, “Execute.”
In an instant, power flowed through the ship, emergency lights flickered off as the burning red boarding lights returned their fiery glow. The entire ship shook as the main thruster came back online, and capacitors began to charge for maneuvers.
“Hard burn, full thrusters, right, on my mark.” Roshal watched as the Heavy Cruiser began to react to her movements, the enemy ship was alive, you needed to roll to broadsides to begin bombardment, come on come on…
Roshal watched as a torpedo flickered out of existence, Runoff 4 gaining another kill.
Come on, dammit, you don’t get put in charge of a Heavy Cruiser without- THERE!
The Heavy Cruiser flinched, turning her bow away from the no longer stricken vessel, preparing for broadside.
The Captain’s grin showed more teeth than smile. “Execute! Full right thrust!”
“Full right thrust! Aye ma’am aye!” Her helmswoman called out as maneuvering thrusters dead cold roared to life and physically threw the vessel to the side, causing everyone not strapped in on the bridge to rock as a barrage of fire flew past their former location, manual targeting systems in play since the automatic systems would still be getting warmed up.
“Full thrust forward, prepare to divert all power to secondary weapons. Weapons, give me a firing solution.” Roshal commanded, hand raised and pointed at the enemy’s display as if she were commanding from a tall ship.
A chant of “Aye ma’am aye” flowed out across the bridge as the weaponsmistress was silent before calling out. “Port side is up to 45% secondary fires and 32% point defense. That’ll be our best bet.”
Roshal nodded. “Make it so. Target their main weapons. Helm, get us that facing.”
“Ma’am. We’re getting a call from Runoff 3. They are entering the AO and are asking for a target.”
Roshal smiled, “Weapons, shift target. Aim for the anti-aerospace systems. Let’s give Runoff 3 the opening they need.”
A clock ticked down.
//////////
“Cookie, we’ve got a targeting path.” Milk called forward. “Putting it up on your HUD.”
“One second… I’ve got it. Moving to comply. Did the Captain give us a plan?” her front seater replied, causing her stomach to do funny things as the Aerospace Fighter maneuvered while under high thrust.
“Something like that. She asked for a munitions report and specifically about our anti-shipping weapon.”
Cookie paused.
“Ah.” He finally said.
“Yeah.” She replied.
“Well, let’s hope they’re able to open us up to a window of opportunity. Or this will be a short charge.”
“Not our place to question why.”
“Just our place to do and die.”
Time to target… three minutes.
Into the valley of Death, rode the six hundred.
A clock ticked down.
//////////
Two vessels, three Aerospace fighters, one chance.
Six minutes of power remained. All actors took their places on the stage.
One hundred kilometers, close enough to check the weld quality of hull seams, the two ships danced across from each other. Maneuvering.
Five minutes of power remained.
The Karcharidon Heavy Cruiser rolled itself trying to keep the vulnerable top deck away from the Patrol Carrier’s presumably still working main gun as Roshal’s vessel jumped to the side. Thrusters roared.
Four minutes of power remained.
Runoff 1 and 4 shot towards their formerly separated comrade, forming up behind them in a wedge. The trio climbed towards the sun as their captain continued to chase and harass the Karcharidon.
Three minutes of power remained.
Roshal spoke. The lances of her vessel fired. Laser blasts carved across the hull of the enemy ship as it rolled.
The rolling ceased. A helmswoman swore as a full broadside caught the Patrol Carrier in the flank. The port hangar pod was ruined, armor shattered and all inside exposed to hard vacuum. Those who could scream died the fastest. The Interceptors had their opening.
Two minutes of power remained.
Silent wings swept through vacuum as three Interceptors began their dive, their formerly speedy arrowhead shape giving way to an inverted t as their wings swept out for stability, the ASF dove and dove and dove.
Five Kilometers away.
The range was too wide. They had one shot. It had to be perfect.
One minute of power remained.
The Into Harm’s Way spat its defiance into the world, limited power drained to give her pilots a seconds more of time.
30 seconds of power remained.
Three Kilometers.
Hard Lock! Milk shouted from the back seat of Runoff 3. Cookie was silent. The range was still too wide.
15 seconds of power remained.
Two Kilometers.
The Karcharidon seemingly began to roll before the Patrol Carrier once more fired, its last remaining weapons spouting their defiance against the world. Deep in engineering, systems began to blow, wires that replaced fuses sparked power and delicate circuit boards shorted out into useless scrap.
The lights went out.
No power remained.
Roshal, in her head, began to count down as lances of light began to sweep across her ship. Damage control did what they could, but the beams began to cut like an overly enthusiastic shipbreaker.
Five.
One Kilometer.
Four.
Cookie’s thumb depressed the firing stud as the Interceptor screamed at him.
Three.
The ASF launched its deadly payload.
Two.
Three Interceptors pulled back hard on their sticks to avoid colliding with the deck.
One.
The thruster of the anti-shipping missile roared as it rocketed the point blank aerospace distance to target.
Impact.
The armor piercing tip of the missile punched into the upper deck plating of the Heavy Cruiser, classified alloys allowing it to pierce into the armored plating just enough to allow the shaped charge to open up a hole as momentum kept the weapon moving.
Within the frame of a single second, the warhead of the missile had entered the ship and, before the alarms even had time to sound, detonated.
A new sun appeared in the void for a split second as a plasma-fusion warhead detonated inside the Karcharidon heavy cruiser’s hull.
//////////
Roshal allowed herself to breathe a sigh of relief inside her head as the emergency power lights flickered overhead and the gravity ever so slightly lightened. What was left of their sensor arrays showed the enemy vessel powering down. “Engineering. Good work, your 10 minutes were just what she needed.” She called out, picking up the ship phone.
There was no answer from engineering.
She signed externally before pointing at one of the marines guarding the bridge, “Find a crewmate in a void suit. I have need of runners.” The marine clasped a fist to her chest before leaving to execute her captain’s commands. “Comms, do we have any contact with the engineering teams on the pirate hulk?”
The Comms officer held up a hand, Roshal waited, “No, ma’am. We aren’t getting- wait. We’ve got visual on flashing lights from the hull. Apparently, something shorted, so they’re having to rebuild broadcast arrays. They can receive just fine, though.”
“Good, once we can maneuver, bring us broadside of them. What’s the status of the merchant fleet?”
Navigation spoke up now, “Still heading for the Jump Point. Should we send the recall order?”
“Not yet, we are still unsure if the area is safe. If we have any sensors remaining, begin sca-”
The mentioned sensor technician interrupted Captain Roshal, “Ma’am, new contact, signature unknown. Just jumped in from outside the starlane!”
“Give me details. Course, range, and speed?” She demanded.
“Signal confused, can’t get a lock!” Navigation called out, “Can’t tell if confusion’s from them or us.”
Not another one… Roshal sighed, “All forces prepa-”
“Ma’am, we’re being hailed.” Communications called out.
“On squawk.”
“This is Captain Al’yosha Cal’rada of Her Imperial Majesty’s Ship Spear of the Knyaginya, responding to Merchant vessel distress calls. Imperial Patrol Carrier, are you in need of assistance at this time?”
Roshal recognized the voice. A junior officer from her days in the Navy and a fellow Sevastutavan. The memory of the fresh faced girl when she’d joined her as an Ensign straight of the Naval Academy flashed before her eyes. “Captain Cal’rada. Your timing is impeccable as always.”
“Admiral?” Roshal could hear the shock in her old protege’s voice.
“That’s Captain, now, Al’yosha. I require your aid in ensuring the disabled vessel still glowing from an ASM strike remains disabled along with Search and Rescue teams for our sister Carrier.
“Whatever you want, you’ll have it, Admiral_… Helm! All ahead flank and plot course to intercept. Launch gunships and prepare to deploy Bluejackets. We’ll test our _Orcas’ teeth today!”
The line cut out a moment later than it should have, and Roshal nodded in approval.
“Captain, I still don’t have a read on new contact. What is it?” Sensors asked.
“A Drep’na inspired vision, come to life.” Roshal watched, feeling an odd sort of parental pride as Al’yosha’s experimental warship began closing the distance towards the Karcharidon at breakneck speeds. “A swift sailing vessel and ten carriage guns…” Roshal murmured the line from an old Vaasconian poem from the ancient Age of Sail. She had heard Cal’rada had succeeded in petitioning the Navy to build her dream-ship, burning every favor and passing out favors to any and everyone to see the program through. Now, there she was, standing on the bridge bearing down on a ship twice her size, but if the rumors were true, only half her guns.
“Ma’am, contact is still not resolving, but IFF confirms Imperial Navy designation. An Akula Class Attack Transport. I’ve… I’ve never even heard of this class.”
“Perhaps we shall hear of them more in the future. Fortune favors the active.”
“Contact is disgorging multiple signals, moving at speeds consistent with aerospace assets.”
“That is our signal we may disengage. Comms, inform the merchant fleet that the area is secure and to begin refueling procedures. Helm, get us alongside the pirate hulk, we have people to recover. Marine, get me a runner to the MP’s, we shall need the port hangar prepared for an old tradition the Navy has regarding pirate prisoners…” Roshal commanded. The fight was over, it was time to begin the cleanup.
//////////
So… that took a while. Sorry about that.
Turns out when a combination of writer’s block, decision paralysis and LIFE hits you over the head, it becomes a touch difficult to get your shit together long enough to write something down.
On the plus side, we are out of the “unplanned bits” and right back into the parts I have brainstormed, so I won’t be staring at a screen trying to think how to make things connect as much anymore. On the other hand, that means we are now entering the epilogue of book 1 of Top Lasgun.
Don’t worry, the story isn’t ending, I’ve got “three” books plotted out in my head, so we’ll see how that shakes out, but for the most part, this is where I start wrapping up plot threads, laying down threads for what comes next, and all that other good stuff.
So yeah, next chapter is going to involve everyone wrapping up what happened here, some fun little Military Justice, and potentially a bunch of plot. Also, I’m planning on starting a “rewrite”/edited version of this to go up on AO3, so keep an eye out for that. Early installment weirdness is a bitch and I’m not proud of what the older stuff looked like.
Well, I hope you have a wonderful morning, afternoon or evening whenever you read this and I will see you next chapter.
[NEXT CHAPTER]
2024.05.16 16:40 randobburner I'm so tired of being scared.
I'm 19 now. I met my ex friend around 2 years ago? So when I was 17. He was a year younger.
Trigger warning: SI/SH/SA
My ex friend was a covert narcissist (a narcissist that hides under insecurity and a need for validation, while their abusive tendencies and lack of empathy remains the same.)
I stood up for him, so much. I tried to validate him, I tried to please him but it was never enough. Even though I’ve been abused twice by narcissists, I never saw it coming.
And the reason I didn't catch it, is because when we first met, he said he had autism. So I trusted him, because he said he was always honest, and because he blamed his toxic tendencies on autism. He seemed so sad, and I wanted to support him. I left friends for him, I stood up for him when people talked bad about him.
To be clear, I'm not being ableist towards autistic people. This is not because of him not understanding social cues or anything like that. The main reason why I left him was because he called himself the "worst kind of narcissist" and even after I told him that was offensive to victims of abuse he just said, “oh.” Like I'm not even joking that was his exact response.
And when I tried to help him (I thought he was gaslighting himself) and my followers who might feel the same way (by making posts about how victims can gaslight themselves into thinking they're the abuser, by talking about narcissism and my own experiences with abuse,) he got really mad and told me "I suspect I have NPD,” and “the only reason why you posted that was because of me, the mere fact that you posted that shows that you look down on me, you have been extremely rude blah blah blah.” Notice that I do not cite him feeling offended by the content of what I posted, because he never said anything about that at all. Is it possible? Sure. But I am sick of feeling like I have to read his mind, I know now that it’s because of his toxic behaviors and manipulation.
I left him after that because he knew I had trauma from abuse, and he’s never been sensitive to that throughout our entire friendship.
I’ll call my ex-friend narcissist to spare myself the drama if he ever finds out what I posted. (He has 30,000 followers online and most of our mutual friends openly sided with him.)
This was a pattern with him. The way he acted whenever he was corrected, it was never an apology, it was him or his friend changing the subject. Oftentimes instead of apologizing he would start to nitpick what others did, like calling others “bad at writing,” and saying stuff like “I'm a better writer than all of you!” These toxic traits are not intrinsic to autism, and are clearly narcissism, right?
I would bring up more examples but obviously I can’t remember them all.
Many of the things he would say were really offensive and degrading towards me, even in group chats, but he would hide it behind a “joke.” None of his friends defended me because they clearly enable him or just didn’t believe me when I say he treated me like sh*t.
But anyways, here are some of the wonderful things he’s said:
“KS” (he knew that I have struggled with MDD and sal ideation for a long time. And he even said it himself, “I shouldn’t say that, (my name) would actually do it.” And he didn’t stop after that. He says this as a joke to a lot of scidal people. I never thought he wouldn’t actually care if I did or not, because I never expected such blatant cruelty from anyone.)
“Your mom isn’t that bad.” (I talked about my experiences with abuse with him on multiple occasions. She puts on a smile and is nice to visitors but she has prevented me from going in-patient when I was actively s*cidal amongst other things. He knew that she basically allowed me to strve myself etc. while calling me “ungrateful” and “selfish” when I didn’t perform well enough in school due to the abuse.)
This next one is so clearly awful, that it’s actually funny that he thinks it was okay to say.
“Me and his mom <3” and “I miss your mom’s cooking so much.” (He said this in a group chat full of strangers to me. After I reminded him I was abused by her, he said, “hate the artist not the art.”)
“Get therapy!” (After I told him about my experience with sual trauma. He has some himself, so it’s possible he was triggered. But we had another mutual friend who would talk about that stuff and would talk about s and he never had a problem with it.)
“Ped*phile” (I used to have a crush on him,) (I’m only a year older, so 17-18) he thought this was a funny joke to make in a group chat full of strangers.
“I want your shirt. Take it off” (I said I'm not wearing anything underneath, and he said “I don’t see a problem with that.” That was in public, I barely knew him at that point.)
“I hate you” and many other things along those lines.
“Get a job!” And “be my sugar daddy” (again, in a group chat full of strangers. I couldn’t get a job due to my eczema which was oftentimes a 10 on the pain scale!)
Some of these things, I didn’t have a problem with back then, because I have never been treated well and didn’t have any sense of self-worth. So I never said anything about it and blamed myself for being "oversensitive"
His actions didn’t really ever show love for me, besides public hugs and affection. He would frequently respond to texts dryly and I just kept talking to him because I thought that was just his thing. I really did have a lot of love for him, but I realize now that that was just my desire for him to stop breadcrumbing me.
Much of my life was me viewing bullying and abuse as “they just struggle with showing that they care in healthy ways.” But the bullying would be things like “I bet she sits her wrists” and “you look like you’re on the verge of s*cide.” (While laughing, of course.)
He said it himself, that he was jealous of me and the fact that I was skinny and passed well as a pre-hormone therapy trans guy. We’re both trans. (I don’t know how people in this subreddit feel about that, but please separate your opinions on that from me. Please focus on the fact that we’re all victims of narcissistic abuse.)
I also have an eating disorder like him, and he would say stuff like “it can’t be as bad as mine because you're skinny.” And like… he knows my body image issues have to do with size and he would size up in public and make me feel short and small when he knew I was insecure about that. He made me feel worthless while calling me handsome in public!
While I was friends with him, the second I did anything that offended him or made him feel an “ick” he would be VERY aggressive about asserting his perspective and would not give any leniency to me.
Some of the things I did to give him the “ick” were jokes I made. I'm warning you though it's really weird and probably very out of place for this subreddit 😅
So I would draw things based on dumb memes like Sonic x Pikachu (as a joke, and he knew that it wasn't my idea, he saw the original meme.) I sent him a video once of like worms on a string bondage (it was a satire/skit not graphic/not like corn) when he asked for drawing ideas and he liked the video I sent him, so I drew his character like that and later he cites that as a reason why he avoided me. When he literally acted exactly the same when it happened and kept talking to me as normal. He also didn't like that I took a screenshot of something that was extremely unfortunate. Like on Instagram there's "notes" which is a new feature that shows everyone's notes lined up. And sometimes they end up next to each other in a very unfortunate way. Basically I had posted his dog's name in all caps 4 times, and my friend had posted "I wanna get him pregnant." (Not intentionally.) And you can guess how that went. Like he took that the wrong way but he never said anything and he acted the same way for months! And it wasn't his autism, because I did clarify that it was a joke, and he has literally no reason to believe that because I have always been a very open advocate for victims of SA, women's rights, like I've never once been that type of person. I literally stood up for him so many times because people called him a creep, I've left so many friends bc they bullied others (one friend was even being blamed for r*pe threats!) and he still “believed” that, knowing that.
And to be perfectly clear- this is what he said to me: “I was just icked out, I never thought you actually meant any of it," also "You seem to have calmed down a bit, and now I can enjoy my time with you even more than before!" But at the same time he was like "I avoided you" "I didn't want to be friends with you" and just he didn't give off a "maybe I misunderstood" impression. He gave off a "my way or the highway impression." I don't have the screenshots anymore because I deleted our chat, but I remember having a panic attack and thinking about s**cide afterwards. Whatever he said, he made me feel like such an awful, disgusting person.
He also said he thought I was “on something.” (I kinda was)
I was really medicated at the time, (around a year ago??) My meds made me both extremely tired and impulsive (trazodone and prozac.)
And to top it all off, he constantly said stuff like "I'm not a good person" and like?? Why would you think that's okay unless it's self deprication, unless you are an awful person (as I've realized recently.)
Like whenever he makes an offensive joke, it’s always “It’s just a harmless joke! Don’t be so sensitive” and whenever someone else does, he either ghosts you, avoids you, gives no hint about what you've done, or he treats you like you’re the worst person in the world and he’s giving you God's grace by telling you what you did wrong. He also makes a lot of "I'm a god" "I'm an angel" type jokes. I thought it was sarcasm before but honestly after this?
The kinds of things I would do were heavily influenced by him and our mutual friend group's behavior. I copied what they did because I had little to no social experience due to bullying and isolation. I literally never had friends before I turned 17. Save for maybe one. (Who I also kept at a distance because I was s***dal and didn't want to hurt them when I followed through.)
And back to the most recent thing he did (which gave me a panic attack and landed me in a psych ward)
The way he approached me about the posts about narcissism I made to help him and others was so accusatory and passive aggressive. (This was after the "worst kind of narcissist joke) Then his friend texted the GC saying “(my name) check your dms” so another act of passive aggression. This friend was the main enabler who’s logic honestly makes no sense to me. She’s like, “it’s fine for him to make that joke, it’s not his job to come out about having narcissism if he doesn't want to, blah blah blah, diagnoses are hard to get.” Like genuinely wtf. Dropping the f slur in the closet is not okay just because you're secretly gay. Like don't make jokes about things you're not willing to be out about. Okay and even ignoring that, it's still so fcking offensive even if he is a narcissist because that’s like a pedfile joking about abusing children.
And the fact he just said “oh.” after I told him it was offensive. Not “I suspect I have npd” or “I'm sorry that was insensitive.” His response was so vague, a blatant lack of effort and empathy, and genuinely I don't think someone with NPD who actually is trying to change would do that.
Then his friend started following me! Not as an act of friendliness, as a social threat, clearly, as they’ve already established a pattern of passive aggression.
It was clear, that if I removed her as a follower or blocked her I would be the one that looked bad! The same way it would look if I said “huh, I haven’t gotten any dms from you” after she said “hey (my name), check your dms” bc I could have deleted it in requests. Then she could say I was a liar. I was starting to get triggered the second she began blindly defending and making excuses for (narcissist) in the groupchat.
She then began to stalk my story, and when she got to the post about how I wouldn’t be able to go to the convention with them (I didn’t say it, but I was so triggered that I was planning on going to the psych ward!) she sent me the skull and crossbones emoji, which, if you're older, is a laughing emoji to this generation. (Meaning dead from laughter.)
Because of the timing of the follow, I know that (narcissist) has been talking shit. Also because they’re best friends and that's what they do. So I know for a fact now, that his last text “right okay,” was sarcasm. And I block all of them.
One of our mutual friends, who I will call (Redacted) was someone I used to talk to almost daily! (Redacted) unfollows me on tiktok, so I block them too.
I block most associated with the group chat, because as far as I know they don't care about me, they've never texted me or spoken to me before, and they’ve almost always ignored my texts to the group chat anyways. They’re also (narcissist)’s friends, and never stood up for me when it came to his behavior in the GC, and were for the most part silent and praising of him.
Like, genuinely, I'm pretty sure (redacted) saw my private posts about my “I feel so unsafe, I want to die, I want to die.” And they still valued whatever (narcissist) said over me. All that talk about “Ily pooks” and shit was a lie.
For additional context (I know this is getting really long, I'm sorry, I just don’t want to leave any room for people victim-blaming me.)
I also struggle with depression-linked psychosis. Something I also fear he will use against me if I ever come out about his treatment of me publicly (but here we are.) My diagnosis doesn’t necessarily include "breaks from reality" and "not being able to tell what's real and what's not." Psychosis occurs in varying intensities. For me, it's mostly depressive hallucinations and I can tell that they aren't real. Many of my hallucinations are auditory and I have never allowed that to impact the way I viewed or treated others in real life, even if they said horrible things to me. They cause me anxiety but it is manageable for me.
It was steadily getting better for me before they decided to do this shit to me! Now I'm worse off than before, hallucinating daily, while he’s living the life of his dreams, and getting famous online.
He refuses to take accountability and that is a form of manipulation. It works for him. To act stupid and act like he can't empathize. He does it whenever he makes a mistake. He starts nitpicking someone else's behavior no matter the impact it has on others. My issue with them is not just what they did, it’s the fact that they want to socially threaten others into doing their bidding. Like, they didn’t have to bring the group chat into it. They didn’t have to be passive aggressive. They didn’t have to be so accusatory and it doesn’t matter if they have trust issues because honestly they were being a massive dick to someone who was always on their side from day one. (Not anymore!)
What happened to him was “I feel insecure because I think he’s calling me stupid.” So he basically called me an asshole, told me I was being rude, etc. etc. What happened to me though? I attempted twice. I don’t handle gaslighting well. That’s how I was abused. And I’m sick of people telling me it’s not his fault for taking advantage of my lack of self-worth, for taking advantage of someone who he knew to be vulnerable. I’m sick of hearing that I just need to “get therapy” and that I'm “equally as bad” or even that “I'm being overdramatic” etc. They made me relive my trauma from bullying to the point where I was hallucinating almost all-day every day, about them bullying me in the same ways I was bullied back then. I would constantly hear their voices making fun of me, bullying me, etc., or them planning to pull up at my house and attempt vandalism (another trauma that I have.) I have not stopped hallucinating him and his friends to this day. This impacts my ability to eat, sleep, and work. It’s literally torture. And I can hear him right now, saying “well, that's not my fault.” Like yes it is. Believe it or not you’re not entitled to treating your (ex) friends like shit just because you have NPD.
The really bad hallucinations started after everything was over. They don't impact my ability to recall events because again most of my hallucinations are auditory.
Honestly I'm just sick of this crap. If you made it this far, I really appreciate the time you’ve spent reading this.
I'm really tired of the victim blaming honestly
submitted by randobburner to TrueNarcissisticAbuse [link] [comments]
Trigger warning: SI/SH/SA
My ex friend was a covert narcissist (a narcissist that hides under insecurity and a need for validation, while their abusive tendencies and lack of empathy remains the same.)
I stood up for him, so much. I tried to validate him, I tried to please him but it was never enough. Even though I’ve been abused twice by narcissists, I never saw it coming.
And the reason I didn't catch it, is because when we first met, he said he had autism. So I trusted him, because he said he was always honest, and because he blamed his toxic tendencies on autism. He seemed so sad, and I wanted to support him. I left friends for him, I stood up for him when people talked bad about him.
To be clear, I'm not being ableist towards autistic people. This is not because of him not understanding social cues or anything like that. The main reason why I left him was because he called himself the "worst kind of narcissist" and even after I told him that was offensive to victims of abuse he just said, “oh.” Like I'm not even joking that was his exact response.
And when I tried to help him (I thought he was gaslighting himself) and my followers who might feel the same way (by making posts about how victims can gaslight themselves into thinking they're the abuser, by talking about narcissism and my own experiences with abuse,) he got really mad and told me "I suspect I have NPD,” and “the only reason why you posted that was because of me, the mere fact that you posted that shows that you look down on me, you have been extremely rude blah blah blah.” Notice that I do not cite him feeling offended by the content of what I posted, because he never said anything about that at all. Is it possible? Sure. But I am sick of feeling like I have to read his mind, I know now that it’s because of his toxic behaviors and manipulation.
I left him after that because he knew I had trauma from abuse, and he’s never been sensitive to that throughout our entire friendship.
I’ll call my ex-friend narcissist to spare myself the drama if he ever finds out what I posted. (He has 30,000 followers online and most of our mutual friends openly sided with him.)
This was a pattern with him. The way he acted whenever he was corrected, it was never an apology, it was him or his friend changing the subject. Oftentimes instead of apologizing he would start to nitpick what others did, like calling others “bad at writing,” and saying stuff like “I'm a better writer than all of you!” These toxic traits are not intrinsic to autism, and are clearly narcissism, right?
I would bring up more examples but obviously I can’t remember them all.
Many of the things he would say were really offensive and degrading towards me, even in group chats, but he would hide it behind a “joke.” None of his friends defended me because they clearly enable him or just didn’t believe me when I say he treated me like sh*t.
But anyways, here are some of the wonderful things he’s said:
“KS” (he knew that I have struggled with MDD and sal ideation for a long time. And he even said it himself, “I shouldn’t say that, (my name) would actually do it.” And he didn’t stop after that. He says this as a joke to a lot of scidal people. I never thought he wouldn’t actually care if I did or not, because I never expected such blatant cruelty from anyone.)
“Your mom isn’t that bad.” (I talked about my experiences with abuse with him on multiple occasions. She puts on a smile and is nice to visitors but she has prevented me from going in-patient when I was actively s*cidal amongst other things. He knew that she basically allowed me to strve myself etc. while calling me “ungrateful” and “selfish” when I didn’t perform well enough in school due to the abuse.)
This next one is so clearly awful, that it’s actually funny that he thinks it was okay to say.
“Me and his mom <3” and “I miss your mom’s cooking so much.” (He said this in a group chat full of strangers to me. After I reminded him I was abused by her, he said, “hate the artist not the art.”)
“Get therapy!” (After I told him about my experience with sual trauma. He has some himself, so it’s possible he was triggered. But we had another mutual friend who would talk about that stuff and would talk about s and he never had a problem with it.)
“Ped*phile” (I used to have a crush on him,) (I’m only a year older, so 17-18) he thought this was a funny joke to make in a group chat full of strangers.
“I want your shirt. Take it off” (I said I'm not wearing anything underneath, and he said “I don’t see a problem with that.” That was in public, I barely knew him at that point.)
“I hate you” and many other things along those lines.
“Get a job!” And “be my sugar daddy” (again, in a group chat full of strangers. I couldn’t get a job due to my eczema which was oftentimes a 10 on the pain scale!)
Some of these things, I didn’t have a problem with back then, because I have never been treated well and didn’t have any sense of self-worth. So I never said anything about it and blamed myself for being "oversensitive"
His actions didn’t really ever show love for me, besides public hugs and affection. He would frequently respond to texts dryly and I just kept talking to him because I thought that was just his thing. I really did have a lot of love for him, but I realize now that that was just my desire for him to stop breadcrumbing me.
Much of my life was me viewing bullying and abuse as “they just struggle with showing that they care in healthy ways.” But the bullying would be things like “I bet she sits her wrists” and “you look like you’re on the verge of s*cide.” (While laughing, of course.)
He said it himself, that he was jealous of me and the fact that I was skinny and passed well as a pre-hormone therapy trans guy. We’re both trans. (I don’t know how people in this subreddit feel about that, but please separate your opinions on that from me. Please focus on the fact that we’re all victims of narcissistic abuse.)
I also have an eating disorder like him, and he would say stuff like “it can’t be as bad as mine because you're skinny.” And like… he knows my body image issues have to do with size and he would size up in public and make me feel short and small when he knew I was insecure about that. He made me feel worthless while calling me handsome in public!
While I was friends with him, the second I did anything that offended him or made him feel an “ick” he would be VERY aggressive about asserting his perspective and would not give any leniency to me.
Some of the things I did to give him the “ick” were jokes I made. I'm warning you though it's really weird and probably very out of place for this subreddit 😅
So I would draw things based on dumb memes like Sonic x Pikachu (as a joke, and he knew that it wasn't my idea, he saw the original meme.) I sent him a video once of like worms on a string bondage (it was a satire/skit not graphic/not like corn) when he asked for drawing ideas and he liked the video I sent him, so I drew his character like that and later he cites that as a reason why he avoided me. When he literally acted exactly the same when it happened and kept talking to me as normal. He also didn't like that I took a screenshot of something that was extremely unfortunate. Like on Instagram there's "notes" which is a new feature that shows everyone's notes lined up. And sometimes they end up next to each other in a very unfortunate way. Basically I had posted his dog's name in all caps 4 times, and my friend had posted "I wanna get him pregnant." (Not intentionally.) And you can guess how that went. Like he took that the wrong way but he never said anything and he acted the same way for months! And it wasn't his autism, because I did clarify that it was a joke, and he has literally no reason to believe that because I have always been a very open advocate for victims of SA, women's rights, like I've never once been that type of person. I literally stood up for him so many times because people called him a creep, I've left so many friends bc they bullied others (one friend was even being blamed for r*pe threats!) and he still “believed” that, knowing that.
And to be perfectly clear- this is what he said to me: “I was just icked out, I never thought you actually meant any of it," also "You seem to have calmed down a bit, and now I can enjoy my time with you even more than before!" But at the same time he was like "I avoided you" "I didn't want to be friends with you" and just he didn't give off a "maybe I misunderstood" impression. He gave off a "my way or the highway impression." I don't have the screenshots anymore because I deleted our chat, but I remember having a panic attack and thinking about s**cide afterwards. Whatever he said, he made me feel like such an awful, disgusting person.
He also said he thought I was “on something.” (I kinda was)
I was really medicated at the time, (around a year ago??) My meds made me both extremely tired and impulsive (trazodone and prozac.)
And to top it all off, he constantly said stuff like "I'm not a good person" and like?? Why would you think that's okay unless it's self deprication, unless you are an awful person (as I've realized recently.)
Like whenever he makes an offensive joke, it’s always “It’s just a harmless joke! Don’t be so sensitive” and whenever someone else does, he either ghosts you, avoids you, gives no hint about what you've done, or he treats you like you’re the worst person in the world and he’s giving you God's grace by telling you what you did wrong. He also makes a lot of "I'm a god" "I'm an angel" type jokes. I thought it was sarcasm before but honestly after this?
The kinds of things I would do were heavily influenced by him and our mutual friend group's behavior. I copied what they did because I had little to no social experience due to bullying and isolation. I literally never had friends before I turned 17. Save for maybe one. (Who I also kept at a distance because I was s***dal and didn't want to hurt them when I followed through.)
And back to the most recent thing he did (which gave me a panic attack and landed me in a psych ward)
The way he approached me about the posts about narcissism I made to help him and others was so accusatory and passive aggressive. (This was after the "worst kind of narcissist joke) Then his friend texted the GC saying “(my name) check your dms” so another act of passive aggression. This friend was the main enabler who’s logic honestly makes no sense to me. She’s like, “it’s fine for him to make that joke, it’s not his job to come out about having narcissism if he doesn't want to, blah blah blah, diagnoses are hard to get.” Like genuinely wtf. Dropping the f slur in the closet is not okay just because you're secretly gay. Like don't make jokes about things you're not willing to be out about. Okay and even ignoring that, it's still so fcking offensive even if he is a narcissist because that’s like a pedfile joking about abusing children.
And the fact he just said “oh.” after I told him it was offensive. Not “I suspect I have npd” or “I'm sorry that was insensitive.” His response was so vague, a blatant lack of effort and empathy, and genuinely I don't think someone with NPD who actually is trying to change would do that.
Then his friend started following me! Not as an act of friendliness, as a social threat, clearly, as they’ve already established a pattern of passive aggression.
It was clear, that if I removed her as a follower or blocked her I would be the one that looked bad! The same way it would look if I said “huh, I haven’t gotten any dms from you” after she said “hey (my name), check your dms” bc I could have deleted it in requests. Then she could say I was a liar. I was starting to get triggered the second she began blindly defending and making excuses for (narcissist) in the groupchat.
She then began to stalk my story, and when she got to the post about how I wouldn’t be able to go to the convention with them (I didn’t say it, but I was so triggered that I was planning on going to the psych ward!) she sent me the skull and crossbones emoji, which, if you're older, is a laughing emoji to this generation. (Meaning dead from laughter.)
Because of the timing of the follow, I know that (narcissist) has been talking shit. Also because they’re best friends and that's what they do. So I know for a fact now, that his last text “right okay,” was sarcasm. And I block all of them.
One of our mutual friends, who I will call (Redacted) was someone I used to talk to almost daily! (Redacted) unfollows me on tiktok, so I block them too.
I block most associated with the group chat, because as far as I know they don't care about me, they've never texted me or spoken to me before, and they’ve almost always ignored my texts to the group chat anyways. They’re also (narcissist)’s friends, and never stood up for me when it came to his behavior in the GC, and were for the most part silent and praising of him.
Like, genuinely, I'm pretty sure (redacted) saw my private posts about my “I feel so unsafe, I want to die, I want to die.” And they still valued whatever (narcissist) said over me. All that talk about “Ily pooks” and shit was a lie.
For additional context (I know this is getting really long, I'm sorry, I just don’t want to leave any room for people victim-blaming me.)
I also struggle with depression-linked psychosis. Something I also fear he will use against me if I ever come out about his treatment of me publicly (but here we are.) My diagnosis doesn’t necessarily include "breaks from reality" and "not being able to tell what's real and what's not." Psychosis occurs in varying intensities. For me, it's mostly depressive hallucinations and I can tell that they aren't real. Many of my hallucinations are auditory and I have never allowed that to impact the way I viewed or treated others in real life, even if they said horrible things to me. They cause me anxiety but it is manageable for me.
It was steadily getting better for me before they decided to do this shit to me! Now I'm worse off than before, hallucinating daily, while he’s living the life of his dreams, and getting famous online.
He refuses to take accountability and that is a form of manipulation. It works for him. To act stupid and act like he can't empathize. He does it whenever he makes a mistake. He starts nitpicking someone else's behavior no matter the impact it has on others. My issue with them is not just what they did, it’s the fact that they want to socially threaten others into doing their bidding. Like, they didn’t have to bring the group chat into it. They didn’t have to be passive aggressive. They didn’t have to be so accusatory and it doesn’t matter if they have trust issues because honestly they were being a massive dick to someone who was always on their side from day one. (Not anymore!)
What happened to him was “I feel insecure because I think he’s calling me stupid.” So he basically called me an asshole, told me I was being rude, etc. etc. What happened to me though? I attempted twice. I don’t handle gaslighting well. That’s how I was abused. And I’m sick of people telling me it’s not his fault for taking advantage of my lack of self-worth, for taking advantage of someone who he knew to be vulnerable. I’m sick of hearing that I just need to “get therapy” and that I'm “equally as bad” or even that “I'm being overdramatic” etc. They made me relive my trauma from bullying to the point where I was hallucinating almost all-day every day, about them bullying me in the same ways I was bullied back then. I would constantly hear their voices making fun of me, bullying me, etc., or them planning to pull up at my house and attempt vandalism (another trauma that I have.) I have not stopped hallucinating him and his friends to this day. This impacts my ability to eat, sleep, and work. It’s literally torture. And I can hear him right now, saying “well, that's not my fault.” Like yes it is. Believe it or not you’re not entitled to treating your (ex) friends like shit just because you have NPD.
The really bad hallucinations started after everything was over. They don't impact my ability to recall events because again most of my hallucinations are auditory.
Honestly I'm just sick of this crap. If you made it this far, I really appreciate the time you’ve spent reading this.
I'm really tired of the victim blaming honestly
2024.05.16 16:39 shesonearth I don't know what to do I tried the nice route.
So we live in a subdivision and we have a neighbor on one side and they were on the other side so the neighbors who moved in because we were here first and it's a brand new subdivision they are pretty cool they keep themselves they are kind of private just like us, the other neighbors beside us they from the start have been very adamant and in your face kind of neighbors
But that's not the issue the issue is how we ended up on meeting and what's been going on ever since
Usually my family we go ahead and we take my children myself and my husband to go knock or ring the doorbell and introduce ourselves and strike up friendly conversation etc, this is how we see it appropriate or just meeting everybody so we're not going back and forth then doing that whole thing we just want to get it out the way and have everybody meet everybody
So I'm working from home in my home and my husband is outside playing basketball with my children and the neighbors who are kind of in your face are home but the husband and the wife are home and the children the woman next door sends her children inside and then walks over to my husband and just loudly just waves him over and she's like always your wife home and he's like she's busy, and she just like oh I wanted to meet all y'all and all this other stuff and she just said that her children have been trying to meet my children and it was kind of odd because she sent them in before she came over to say hello to my husband and didn't bring her children to say hello to my children who are out there playing basketball with my husband also she didn't make it a point to go inside and get her husband who was also in the home to come outside so they can all collectively say hello which was kind of off-putting.
But nothing else was thought of it so it had been a while since any interaction, me and my children ended up bumping into her husband on our way to the mailbox and we had a conversation and said hello and a few things and my children met his children they started to play because they actually wanted to meet them just like she said and what not so we let them play for a little bit we only just talked for a moment and then I left went back home and then shortly later in the day the whole family comes and shows up to our home I guess he told her that we had a conversation and the children played so I guess she then wanted to come and meet me.
So they show up to the door they come at dinner time and we're just kind of in a rush and so we all say hello and this is when the red flag weird stuff starts to happen is after her husband is standing in front of her she's lightly kind of behind him so he can't really see what she's doing but she's just like back and forth staring down my husband like a piece of meat, giggling and trying to catch his gays repeatedly, and then looking back and forth at her husband trying to see if he's looking or not she didn't look at me one time while she was standing on my porch and then I made a comment and said that I had met one of her relatives when I was going on a bike ride and she said that she likes my hair and my outfit and she said oh okay and then she continued to glance back and forth at my husband and her husband and she had no interest in me and having any kind of conversation or real meeting of hello or anything.
So after that it left a bitter taste in my mouth because people like that they tend to have it all but they need more and they need like attention from the outside even though they have everything right in front of them they can't really see it. but anyway she struck me as this attention seeker and it turns out she actually is.
so her whole family came to the door, we were eating dinner, and they wanted to know if our children could come out and play and I said we just sat down to eat and you can tell that she was bothered by that and bothered by the fact that I answered the door because before she came up she was primping herself on the doorbell camera,
So I let her know that we would be coming out later after we're done so we go over and then I have her children come out and play with my children for a little bit.
We end up having a conversation while they were playing and at first she did seem kind of genuine but then she started to get over the top and just started saying I was so funny and she kept hitting me and trying to be buddy buddy and over and over again putting her hands on me laughing and it was very off putting and very fake feeling like she was trying to get bloody buddy with me somehow very quickly.
She referred to my husband as Daddy and it was kind of off-putting the way she had said it and then because I didn't like the way she said, what about daaaadyy is what she said when she asked about my husbands involvement in our day today which was kind of weird.
So I went ahead and when we were talking I said it back to her yeah your children probably need daddy too and I said exactly how she did and hopefully she got the head but nope and also she was asking me for advice about staying home and needing to be out just needing to be doing something because her husband was taken care of her too much and working but he wasn't even working a lot he work from home and in the office but he said she didn't have to and that he takes care of her but she doesn't want him to she wants to just be out there in the streets essentially doing something and being seen.
Her words not mine.
And she said she can't help it because she had her children she doesn't want to be just cooped up in the house everyday or something like that.
And so that was kind of off-putting and then I mentioned focusing on your family like being present with them and focusing solely on them reaps really good benefits because you create a closer Bond and you don't need outside anything to feel complete essentially what you have is inside of you and I just kind of reference that when she kept saying that she needs to just be on the go when she can't sit still and she said her husband always says that he's got her and that their mom needs them and things like that and I said I agree because I know how I am with my children and I have my children all the time and my family works really great because of the way our dynamic works and I tried to like give some knowledge and information to her but she kind of wasn't hearing it and didn't seem interested really in that dynamic.
So after that day she text me and wants me to go to the park with him but I'm in the shower and I never see her text message till I'm done and I have like this whole routine so it takes about an hour or so until she's just like in the park and I finally text her back the park is up the street and I text her back and she's just like kind of upset that I didn't show up and that's understandable but I did let her know like hey I was busy and I didn't see your text message can we try and do something else and so I let her know that we can have the boys hang out and we hang out tomorrow and then the next day me and my kids went for a walk and she was also on a walk with her child, we briefly passed each other cuz I'm coming out of my house and she's entering up the sidewalk to the driveway to her house she sees me and I just kind of stand there waiting so I can wave her and she just like looks through me and continues to walk
So I didn't think anything of I just kind of laughed to myself because it was kind of a petty cuz she clearly saw me but whatever but I texted her when I got back from the walk and said hey I saw you on our walk a few minutes ago I don't know if you saw me, but I just wanted to let you know that the boys are available at this x amount of time, she text me back later lets me know the time works out so the boys and I come out there later on that day at that time then this was before our dinner time so I tried to accompany and accommodate, my children are out there playing basketball and this woman literally at the exact time at her children are supposed to be out there text me and said one of her children were in trouble and can't come out there we'll catch you all next time
And I said thanks for the courtesy etc and so the next time we saw her was when my husband was cutting the grass I was inside doing some housework he was outside cutting the grass with my children running back and forth doing everything like they usually do and so during that time she makes her way outside and she's got this really short pink dress on and it's like really cold outside and it was just like really alarming to me and she's just like out there walking around sweeping her front porch and then like while my husband is cutting the side that's closest to their house she's like back to back with him and she just makes it a point to be like hey how you doing and just other stuff even though earlier in the day when we got home we both wave to them from the car and said hey and so it was kind of odd that she made another appearance to try and speak to my husband, he brought this to my attention and he said that he was very brief about it because he knows how things are between me and her and how we revives were between us and so he just briefly said Hi and then turn back around and kept cutting the grass and so I guess that wasn't enough attention for her
So after he was done cutting the grass I never took myself outside even though he said that she was out there and was trying to strike up a conversation, after that and he started to do the wrap up , but the hose away put the gutters back on and all that stuff blow the grass away.
And so basically I get a notification on my phone from the doorbell camera and the garage camera went off as well and I'm like okay someone has been spotted that's what it says and I look and I see this person standing there in a pink dress mini dress she's right there in front of my house sweeping the grass out of my driveway and sweep in the grass almost basically to the other side of the neighbor's house she's directly in front of my house sweeping my grass up going back and forth essentially waiting for my husband to come out there and I don't know what have an interaction talk I don't know look at me I'm cleaning up your grass I have no idea
And so I let my husband know like I see this happening right now on the camera and then he's just like I'm about to go cook dinner he goes to go cook dinner and I let him know I'm going to handle the cleanup and then I go out there with the broom and I walk out there I don't say anything to her and I just started sweeping and then she looks shocked to see me cuz I don't even think she knew I was home because the car wasn't in the driveway and then she just walks past and she's just wiping her nose and has her head down and she just walks back up to her driveway, her husband was cutting the grass on the other side of the house by the way her children were running around but she was in front of my house and in my driveway back and forth sweeping my grass instead of over there helping her husband with his yard work she was in my driveway and the other side of my yard sweeping the grass
And then she just after she gets back to her side of the house she's just like hey how you doing? And I say good and then I keep sweeping and then like she got this like grin on her face and she's just like see that I'm like visibly like annoyed with her and so she just keeps it moving, and so after that I went to the house and got the leaf blower and just started blowing the grass out so I can get back in the house cuz I was just like I was just really irritable, I'm blowing the grass and then I hear her come up right behind me and say hey hey where did you get that leaf blower at and I turned around and I said I don't know it's old and then I continue to blow the grass away and I guess she took the hat because I was pretty Stern with it and I think she came back to say something to me to see if I was in a good mood or to see if I was still like angry essentially because she got caught doing what she was doing
I didn't sugar coat when I spoke to her and I'm thinking okay she got the hint. And then a few days later she tried to make a playdate and then I said my children are unavailable at that time then, we were going to a nearby Creek and taking my children they wanted to go and we ate before we left we were going to leave around like 4:30 and so we didn't leave at 4:30 we ate and then we were going to leave now as we are eating I get a notification on the doorbell camera and the garage camera yet again and it says person has been spotted I checked the camera and she's out there walking back and forth back and forth back and forth with her children trying to see if we're going to come out trying to see if she can wave at us in miraculous and any kind of way I don't know but she's in front of our house her house on the complete other side and she's just back and forth walking with them
And we ended up leaving a close to 5:00 p.m. so by that time she already went in the house
And after that I just was done with any kind of interactions with her because she is very off putting and she gives off this vibe and energy of I am being fake. And I have an ulterior motive and I need to Garner attention from Men even though I have one.
Even the guy next to us was outside cleaning his car and then her husband was in the house yet again and after he went inside I guess he was like busy , So she took it upon herself to scream across the yard and say ooh that looks good. Referring to his car and so he comes over and then starts talking to her across from our yard and and her yard and she starts complimenting his car ridiculously and was just asking a bunch of stuff about his car and his pain and and what he does and how does he get it to look like that and just a bunch of stuff and what crossed my mind was the whole married women complimenting another man's car perfusively was kind of off-putting.
And so they carried conversation for a while and then to the point that he ended up getting his phone and trying to show her something about his paint job and then he actually paused before he actually had her come over and like look at the phone and she goes oh you can send it to me and I don't know if they have each other's numbers or whatever but I heard her say that and then he actually paused and said I sent it to your husband actually and then she was just like oh okay and then she stopped the conversation and went in the house
Just yesterday because we haven't had a moment to cut the grass in a while my husband cut the grass after he got off of work so me and the children were outside and we were all doing yard work like we usually do I was trimming and the boys were trimming and picking things up in the yard and she pulls up. Usually she picks up her kids and then goes in the home closes the garage and we don't see her the rest of the day, but since we are all out here and my husband's got in the grass she made it a point to pull up leave the garage open open trunk and just bring her kids out and have them running around in the driveway which I knew was going to happen, because whenever my husband's out there she makes it a point to be out there but when I hop out she flies inside of her house
So I'm out there packing up my grass and I was done because my mom had called and so I'm on the phone with her and my husband is starting to cut the side of the grass closest to her house and so, I say on the phone and I'm just like talking on the phone while looking into her driveway and garage knowing that she's going to pop out at any second to try and get some kind of attention from my husband because she's been doing that, she actually came out when I was right there just waiting and then she briefly raised her hand and waved while my husband didn't see her so he's over pushing the mower back and forth back and forth and conveniently she's in the garage going from one side of the car to the next side of the car from one side of the car to the next side of the car she did this about eight times
And he never looked her way didn't give her any kind of attention so eventually she went ahead and close the garage cuz I guess she saw me actually noticing what she was doing so she closed the garage and went house so my husband stops or is finished cutting the grass on that side of the house so he pushes it to almost the back of the outside of the fence now they don't have a fence, so her kids ran out and were right there while my husband was cutting the grass I'm guessing she was all so back there as well to try and say hello to my husband from the back of the house because she knew I was in the front of the house
And he said he didn't actually see her he was just focused on cutting the grass but I'm sure she was back there since her children were running around back and forth back there as well.
So that was pretty long but that's what has been happening since she moved in here, I am not sure how to go about anything her children seem very kind her husband is very nice and not red flaggy at all she on the other hand has the need to go up to every single neighbor and talk up people but specifically because I live next door to her it's like a game to her because she finds every moment to speak to my husband I haven't even mentioned the other times that he was out there just like cleaning out the car and she just hopped out it would just stand there and try and get his attention and then he would not give her any attention I wouldn't even look her way, it's like she can hear when we're out there or here when he's out there doing something and she can find a way to speak to him and it's really off putting and I'm not really sure what to do I've been closing all of my curtains and blinds because when she first got here she was actually looking and standing straight across looking straight. Into my house for a lot of good 5 minutes while I was vacuuming and so I close all my stuff up.
I would love some recommendations on how to peacefully handle this situation I am not sure what is going on mentally in this woman's head or why she needs to Garner this attention and I just want to be kind about it because I actually tried again and wished her a happy mother's day but then this incident happened after that so I am just done with the situation I feel like, I don't have any desire to try and be friends with her or even just be neighborly.
I would love some feedback or advice on how to peacefully go about this, the only time we are really out there is to cut the grass and do yard work which is pretty rare so I guess we don't have to really see them.
All feedback is welcome, I am close to pushing 40 so I really don't have the mental energy to deal with this kind of situation anymore I'm feeling like it's beneath me and very childish to actually do any kind of intentional situation as far as ignoring and things like that or being unkind I don't want to get roped into drama and things like that and I just wish that woman healing to be honest.
But I would love some feedback on this scenario thank you.
submitted by shesonearth to neighborsfromhell [link] [comments]
But that's not the issue the issue is how we ended up on meeting and what's been going on ever since
Usually my family we go ahead and we take my children myself and my husband to go knock or ring the doorbell and introduce ourselves and strike up friendly conversation etc, this is how we see it appropriate or just meeting everybody so we're not going back and forth then doing that whole thing we just want to get it out the way and have everybody meet everybody
So I'm working from home in my home and my husband is outside playing basketball with my children and the neighbors who are kind of in your face are home but the husband and the wife are home and the children the woman next door sends her children inside and then walks over to my husband and just loudly just waves him over and she's like always your wife home and he's like she's busy, and she just like oh I wanted to meet all y'all and all this other stuff and she just said that her children have been trying to meet my children and it was kind of odd because she sent them in before she came over to say hello to my husband and didn't bring her children to say hello to my children who are out there playing basketball with my husband also she didn't make it a point to go inside and get her husband who was also in the home to come outside so they can all collectively say hello which was kind of off-putting.
But nothing else was thought of it so it had been a while since any interaction, me and my children ended up bumping into her husband on our way to the mailbox and we had a conversation and said hello and a few things and my children met his children they started to play because they actually wanted to meet them just like she said and what not so we let them play for a little bit we only just talked for a moment and then I left went back home and then shortly later in the day the whole family comes and shows up to our home I guess he told her that we had a conversation and the children played so I guess she then wanted to come and meet me.
So they show up to the door they come at dinner time and we're just kind of in a rush and so we all say hello and this is when the red flag weird stuff starts to happen is after her husband is standing in front of her she's lightly kind of behind him so he can't really see what she's doing but she's just like back and forth staring down my husband like a piece of meat, giggling and trying to catch his gays repeatedly, and then looking back and forth at her husband trying to see if he's looking or not she didn't look at me one time while she was standing on my porch and then I made a comment and said that I had met one of her relatives when I was going on a bike ride and she said that she likes my hair and my outfit and she said oh okay and then she continued to glance back and forth at my husband and her husband and she had no interest in me and having any kind of conversation or real meeting of hello or anything.
So after that it left a bitter taste in my mouth because people like that they tend to have it all but they need more and they need like attention from the outside even though they have everything right in front of them they can't really see it. but anyway she struck me as this attention seeker and it turns out she actually is.
so her whole family came to the door, we were eating dinner, and they wanted to know if our children could come out and play and I said we just sat down to eat and you can tell that she was bothered by that and bothered by the fact that I answered the door because before she came up she was primping herself on the doorbell camera,
So I let her know that we would be coming out later after we're done so we go over and then I have her children come out and play with my children for a little bit.
We end up having a conversation while they were playing and at first she did seem kind of genuine but then she started to get over the top and just started saying I was so funny and she kept hitting me and trying to be buddy buddy and over and over again putting her hands on me laughing and it was very off putting and very fake feeling like she was trying to get bloody buddy with me somehow very quickly.
She referred to my husband as Daddy and it was kind of off-putting the way she had said it and then because I didn't like the way she said, what about daaaadyy is what she said when she asked about my husbands involvement in our day today which was kind of weird.
So I went ahead and when we were talking I said it back to her yeah your children probably need daddy too and I said exactly how she did and hopefully she got the head but nope and also she was asking me for advice about staying home and needing to be out just needing to be doing something because her husband was taken care of her too much and working but he wasn't even working a lot he work from home and in the office but he said she didn't have to and that he takes care of her but she doesn't want him to she wants to just be out there in the streets essentially doing something and being seen.
Her words not mine.
And she said she can't help it because she had her children she doesn't want to be just cooped up in the house everyday or something like that.
And so that was kind of off-putting and then I mentioned focusing on your family like being present with them and focusing solely on them reaps really good benefits because you create a closer Bond and you don't need outside anything to feel complete essentially what you have is inside of you and I just kind of reference that when she kept saying that she needs to just be on the go when she can't sit still and she said her husband always says that he's got her and that their mom needs them and things like that and I said I agree because I know how I am with my children and I have my children all the time and my family works really great because of the way our dynamic works and I tried to like give some knowledge and information to her but she kind of wasn't hearing it and didn't seem interested really in that dynamic.
So after that day she text me and wants me to go to the park with him but I'm in the shower and I never see her text message till I'm done and I have like this whole routine so it takes about an hour or so until she's just like in the park and I finally text her back the park is up the street and I text her back and she's just like kind of upset that I didn't show up and that's understandable but I did let her know like hey I was busy and I didn't see your text message can we try and do something else and so I let her know that we can have the boys hang out and we hang out tomorrow and then the next day me and my kids went for a walk and she was also on a walk with her child, we briefly passed each other cuz I'm coming out of my house and she's entering up the sidewalk to the driveway to her house she sees me and I just kind of stand there waiting so I can wave her and she just like looks through me and continues to walk
So I didn't think anything of I just kind of laughed to myself because it was kind of a petty cuz she clearly saw me but whatever but I texted her when I got back from the walk and said hey I saw you on our walk a few minutes ago I don't know if you saw me, but I just wanted to let you know that the boys are available at this x amount of time, she text me back later lets me know the time works out so the boys and I come out there later on that day at that time then this was before our dinner time so I tried to accompany and accommodate, my children are out there playing basketball and this woman literally at the exact time at her children are supposed to be out there text me and said one of her children were in trouble and can't come out there we'll catch you all next time
And I said thanks for the courtesy etc and so the next time we saw her was when my husband was cutting the grass I was inside doing some housework he was outside cutting the grass with my children running back and forth doing everything like they usually do and so during that time she makes her way outside and she's got this really short pink dress on and it's like really cold outside and it was just like really alarming to me and she's just like out there walking around sweeping her front porch and then like while my husband is cutting the side that's closest to their house she's like back to back with him and she just makes it a point to be like hey how you doing and just other stuff even though earlier in the day when we got home we both wave to them from the car and said hey and so it was kind of odd that she made another appearance to try and speak to my husband, he brought this to my attention and he said that he was very brief about it because he knows how things are between me and her and how we revives were between us and so he just briefly said Hi and then turn back around and kept cutting the grass and so I guess that wasn't enough attention for her
So after he was done cutting the grass I never took myself outside even though he said that she was out there and was trying to strike up a conversation, after that and he started to do the wrap up , but the hose away put the gutters back on and all that stuff blow the grass away.
And so basically I get a notification on my phone from the doorbell camera and the garage camera went off as well and I'm like okay someone has been spotted that's what it says and I look and I see this person standing there in a pink dress mini dress she's right there in front of my house sweeping the grass out of my driveway and sweep in the grass almost basically to the other side of the neighbor's house she's directly in front of my house sweeping my grass up going back and forth essentially waiting for my husband to come out there and I don't know what have an interaction talk I don't know look at me I'm cleaning up your grass I have no idea
And so I let my husband know like I see this happening right now on the camera and then he's just like I'm about to go cook dinner he goes to go cook dinner and I let him know I'm going to handle the cleanup and then I go out there with the broom and I walk out there I don't say anything to her and I just started sweeping and then she looks shocked to see me cuz I don't even think she knew I was home because the car wasn't in the driveway and then she just walks past and she's just wiping her nose and has her head down and she just walks back up to her driveway, her husband was cutting the grass on the other side of the house by the way her children were running around but she was in front of my house and in my driveway back and forth sweeping my grass instead of over there helping her husband with his yard work she was in my driveway and the other side of my yard sweeping the grass
And then she just after she gets back to her side of the house she's just like hey how you doing? And I say good and then I keep sweeping and then like she got this like grin on her face and she's just like see that I'm like visibly like annoyed with her and so she just keeps it moving, and so after that I went to the house and got the leaf blower and just started blowing the grass out so I can get back in the house cuz I was just like I was just really irritable, I'm blowing the grass and then I hear her come up right behind me and say hey hey where did you get that leaf blower at and I turned around and I said I don't know it's old and then I continue to blow the grass away and I guess she took the hat because I was pretty Stern with it and I think she came back to say something to me to see if I was in a good mood or to see if I was still like angry essentially because she got caught doing what she was doing
I didn't sugar coat when I spoke to her and I'm thinking okay she got the hint. And then a few days later she tried to make a playdate and then I said my children are unavailable at that time then, we were going to a nearby Creek and taking my children they wanted to go and we ate before we left we were going to leave around like 4:30 and so we didn't leave at 4:30 we ate and then we were going to leave now as we are eating I get a notification on the doorbell camera and the garage camera yet again and it says person has been spotted I checked the camera and she's out there walking back and forth back and forth back and forth with her children trying to see if we're going to come out trying to see if she can wave at us in miraculous and any kind of way I don't know but she's in front of our house her house on the complete other side and she's just back and forth walking with them
And we ended up leaving a close to 5:00 p.m. so by that time she already went in the house
And after that I just was done with any kind of interactions with her because she is very off putting and she gives off this vibe and energy of I am being fake. And I have an ulterior motive and I need to Garner attention from Men even though I have one.
Even the guy next to us was outside cleaning his car and then her husband was in the house yet again and after he went inside I guess he was like busy , So she took it upon herself to scream across the yard and say ooh that looks good. Referring to his car and so he comes over and then starts talking to her across from our yard and and her yard and she starts complimenting his car ridiculously and was just asking a bunch of stuff about his car and his pain and and what he does and how does he get it to look like that and just a bunch of stuff and what crossed my mind was the whole married women complimenting another man's car perfusively was kind of off-putting.
And so they carried conversation for a while and then to the point that he ended up getting his phone and trying to show her something about his paint job and then he actually paused before he actually had her come over and like look at the phone and she goes oh you can send it to me and I don't know if they have each other's numbers or whatever but I heard her say that and then he actually paused and said I sent it to your husband actually and then she was just like oh okay and then she stopped the conversation and went in the house
Just yesterday because we haven't had a moment to cut the grass in a while my husband cut the grass after he got off of work so me and the children were outside and we were all doing yard work like we usually do I was trimming and the boys were trimming and picking things up in the yard and she pulls up. Usually she picks up her kids and then goes in the home closes the garage and we don't see her the rest of the day, but since we are all out here and my husband's got in the grass she made it a point to pull up leave the garage open open trunk and just bring her kids out and have them running around in the driveway which I knew was going to happen, because whenever my husband's out there she makes it a point to be out there but when I hop out she flies inside of her house
So I'm out there packing up my grass and I was done because my mom had called and so I'm on the phone with her and my husband is starting to cut the side of the grass closest to her house and so, I say on the phone and I'm just like talking on the phone while looking into her driveway and garage knowing that she's going to pop out at any second to try and get some kind of attention from my husband because she's been doing that, she actually came out when I was right there just waiting and then she briefly raised her hand and waved while my husband didn't see her so he's over pushing the mower back and forth back and forth and conveniently she's in the garage going from one side of the car to the next side of the car from one side of the car to the next side of the car she did this about eight times
And he never looked her way didn't give her any kind of attention so eventually she went ahead and close the garage cuz I guess she saw me actually noticing what she was doing so she closed the garage and went house so my husband stops or is finished cutting the grass on that side of the house so he pushes it to almost the back of the outside of the fence now they don't have a fence, so her kids ran out and were right there while my husband was cutting the grass I'm guessing she was all so back there as well to try and say hello to my husband from the back of the house because she knew I was in the front of the house
And he said he didn't actually see her he was just focused on cutting the grass but I'm sure she was back there since her children were running around back and forth back there as well.
So that was pretty long but that's what has been happening since she moved in here, I am not sure how to go about anything her children seem very kind her husband is very nice and not red flaggy at all she on the other hand has the need to go up to every single neighbor and talk up people but specifically because I live next door to her it's like a game to her because she finds every moment to speak to my husband I haven't even mentioned the other times that he was out there just like cleaning out the car and she just hopped out it would just stand there and try and get his attention and then he would not give her any attention I wouldn't even look her way, it's like she can hear when we're out there or here when he's out there doing something and she can find a way to speak to him and it's really off putting and I'm not really sure what to do I've been closing all of my curtains and blinds because when she first got here she was actually looking and standing straight across looking straight. Into my house for a lot of good 5 minutes while I was vacuuming and so I close all my stuff up.
I would love some recommendations on how to peacefully handle this situation I am not sure what is going on mentally in this woman's head or why she needs to Garner this attention and I just want to be kind about it because I actually tried again and wished her a happy mother's day but then this incident happened after that so I am just done with the situation I feel like, I don't have any desire to try and be friends with her or even just be neighborly.
I would love some feedback or advice on how to peacefully go about this, the only time we are really out there is to cut the grass and do yard work which is pretty rare so I guess we don't have to really see them.
All feedback is welcome, I am close to pushing 40 so I really don't have the mental energy to deal with this kind of situation anymore I'm feeling like it's beneath me and very childish to actually do any kind of intentional situation as far as ignoring and things like that or being unkind I don't want to get roped into drama and things like that and I just wish that woman healing to be honest.
But I would love some feedback on this scenario thank you.
2024.05.16 16:34 Crocman100 Need Ideas for a big reveal.
This is all for a TTRPG that I'm running for some friends. If this isn't the right place for this please let me know.
To start off with, if you're playing in a game where the phrases "President Andrew Garfield", "Clowns of America" and "an imp wielding a fan blade" sound familiar to you, stop reading. This is about our campaign. ........................................................................... ........................................................................... ........................................................................... ...........................................................................Context: So, I am currently running a game set in a near future (2075) where magic has slowly been returning to the world, but is still mostly hidden, for the last 100 years. In this world their are 9 "gods" that rule over the following: 1. Urbos- cities, civilization, law, order 2. Fabulaz- Stories, legends, myths 3. Libertas- Freedom, liberty, Justice, fairness 4. Messor- Death, fate, burials, afterlife 5. Vita- Life, nature, wildlife, predatoprey relationships 6. Technos- The internet, technology, engineering 7. Penucia- Merchants, gambling, wealth 8. Null- Undeath, necromancy, secrets 9. Vaccus- Emptiness, vaccumes, nothing.
The big secret with all of this (and the big thing the party doesn't know) is that all but one of the gods listed above are not actually "gods". They are all creatures "blessed" by the 9th god with insane power over something mortals fear. The 9th god, Vaccus, is the only real god. However they are closer to a lovecraftian diety and the entire campaign setting takes place in Vaccus's dreams.
The Story (the party doesn't know this either): A cult, being lead by somebody who was cursed with immortality and wants to die, is going to try several methods of killing their leader. Their last ditch attempt will be to try and wake up Vaccus, as if this being wakes up it would result in the end of everything in an instant. The best and most efficient way to do that is by turning Vaccus's dream into a nightmare. They plan on doing this by "forcing" the creation of a new god like entity that will embody a fear of destruction and a comming apocalypse, I am tentatively calling it Apolyon, but I'm not entirely sold on that name. Their first step in doing this was to take over large portions if the world's government by killing and replacing important officials with dopplegangers. They've done this without issues in Russia, China and Sweden, but they fucked up in the US when the president's (if you read the above, yes the current president is Andrew Garfield AKA one of the spidermen) daughter escaped and the assasination "attempt" got leaked to the news.
What the party knows: The attempt on the president's life was orchestrated by an unknown entity using dopplegangers. To cover their tracks, the "president" (who they correctly assume is actually a doppelganger) anounced that it was his daughter who made the attempt on his life, saying she has fallen in with a group of eco terrorists who have supposedly taken responsibility for the attack. They know this isn't true because they saved both the president's daughter AND a secret service agent from a car crash/doppleganger attack and both are now traveling with them. The goal is to remove the way the dopplegangers are tracking the president's daughter and bring her to an military base that has been both decomissioned and wiped from any US database. The only reason they know about it is because the president verbally told the Secret Service agent about it in the past as a "if all other options to protect my daughter fail, go here."
What the party will soon discover: The military base in question is actually an abandoned neighborhood that the government used during the mid to late 70s (when magic was first starting to return to the world) to conduct MKUltra style experiments. Their plan was to try and spy on people through their dreams. They had the most tangential success with artists of varying mediums but they could not control who's dreams they were entering and influencing, with many of them going insane. The reason many of them went insane was because they were entering the subconsious dreams of Vaccus (almost like if you were to lucid dream but instead of you realizing its a dream, the people and characters in your dream realized they were in your dream), meaning they were 1. Witnessing incomprehensible things that a eldritch creature would dream of in their deep subconsious and 2. Seeing the entire history of the universe play out before them in what felt like in real time, but was acually only done in the span of a few minutes to a few hours if they were lucky. This lead to those who were still somewhat coherent to make art depicting some of the things they saw, but in a stylized way. For example, poems about something that should not be, paintings and sculptures of the birth of each god, stories that, when you read between the lines, speak of a world ending calamity that would cause Vaccus to wake up, ect...
What I'm looking for help with is comming up with different pieces of art that will make the full puzzle. So like a poem tells part of one story, a description of a short film depicts another, a painting, children's book ect... I want at least 9 or so different pieces that can describe the reveal mentioned above with 1 for each worshiped god and the 9th being a description of creating a nightmare for Vaccus. The idea is that each description/art piece tells a different part of the same story, but the party won't get them in order. I have come up with some ideas for the different art pieces, but I want some more ideas or suggestions. I also want different people to give their descriptions and I feel that if it was just me making all of these descriptions, they would all feel way too similar and give off the feel of "one person trying 9 different mediums" than "9 different artists telling the same story". I have an idea for the 1st one chronologically that takes the form of a children's book that decribes a little boy who is tormented by his older siblings and thus escapes to his dreams to find friends (the other gods) and go on adventures. It would be unfinished with the party only finding the first few pages depicting the boy make the Gods Vita and Messor to populate the world and give life meaning. I plan on refining it a bit more and using more symbolism than what I described above but I think it gives the general idea.
Sorry for the long post, I've been thinking of this idea for a long time and only now the party is getting close enough to it for me to really start planning for it. TLDR; What are some different descriptions of art works (poems, stories, paintings ect...) that when put together tell the story of the world's creation and reveal the fact that the setting takes place in the dreams of an eldritch entity. I would love to hear what you all have to offer to this.
submitted by Crocman100 to worldbuilding [link] [comments]
To start off with, if you're playing in a game where the phrases "President Andrew Garfield", "Clowns of America" and "an imp wielding a fan blade" sound familiar to you, stop reading. This is about our campaign. ........................................................................... ........................................................................... ........................................................................... ...........................................................................Context: So, I am currently running a game set in a near future (2075) where magic has slowly been returning to the world, but is still mostly hidden, for the last 100 years. In this world their are 9 "gods" that rule over the following: 1. Urbos- cities, civilization, law, order 2. Fabulaz- Stories, legends, myths 3. Libertas- Freedom, liberty, Justice, fairness 4. Messor- Death, fate, burials, afterlife 5. Vita- Life, nature, wildlife, predatoprey relationships 6. Technos- The internet, technology, engineering 7. Penucia- Merchants, gambling, wealth 8. Null- Undeath, necromancy, secrets 9. Vaccus- Emptiness, vaccumes, nothing.
The big secret with all of this (and the big thing the party doesn't know) is that all but one of the gods listed above are not actually "gods". They are all creatures "blessed" by the 9th god with insane power over something mortals fear. The 9th god, Vaccus, is the only real god. However they are closer to a lovecraftian diety and the entire campaign setting takes place in Vaccus's dreams.
The Story (the party doesn't know this either): A cult, being lead by somebody who was cursed with immortality and wants to die, is going to try several methods of killing their leader. Their last ditch attempt will be to try and wake up Vaccus, as if this being wakes up it would result in the end of everything in an instant. The best and most efficient way to do that is by turning Vaccus's dream into a nightmare. They plan on doing this by "forcing" the creation of a new god like entity that will embody a fear of destruction and a comming apocalypse, I am tentatively calling it Apolyon, but I'm not entirely sold on that name. Their first step in doing this was to take over large portions if the world's government by killing and replacing important officials with dopplegangers. They've done this without issues in Russia, China and Sweden, but they fucked up in the US when the president's (if you read the above, yes the current president is Andrew Garfield AKA one of the spidermen) daughter escaped and the assasination "attempt" got leaked to the news.
What the party knows: The attempt on the president's life was orchestrated by an unknown entity using dopplegangers. To cover their tracks, the "president" (who they correctly assume is actually a doppelganger) anounced that it was his daughter who made the attempt on his life, saying she has fallen in with a group of eco terrorists who have supposedly taken responsibility for the attack. They know this isn't true because they saved both the president's daughter AND a secret service agent from a car crash/doppleganger attack and both are now traveling with them. The goal is to remove the way the dopplegangers are tracking the president's daughter and bring her to an military base that has been both decomissioned and wiped from any US database. The only reason they know about it is because the president verbally told the Secret Service agent about it in the past as a "if all other options to protect my daughter fail, go here."
What the party will soon discover: The military base in question is actually an abandoned neighborhood that the government used during the mid to late 70s (when magic was first starting to return to the world) to conduct MKUltra style experiments. Their plan was to try and spy on people through their dreams. They had the most tangential success with artists of varying mediums but they could not control who's dreams they were entering and influencing, with many of them going insane. The reason many of them went insane was because they were entering the subconsious dreams of Vaccus (almost like if you were to lucid dream but instead of you realizing its a dream, the people and characters in your dream realized they were in your dream), meaning they were 1. Witnessing incomprehensible things that a eldritch creature would dream of in their deep subconsious and 2. Seeing the entire history of the universe play out before them in what felt like in real time, but was acually only done in the span of a few minutes to a few hours if they were lucky. This lead to those who were still somewhat coherent to make art depicting some of the things they saw, but in a stylized way. For example, poems about something that should not be, paintings and sculptures of the birth of each god, stories that, when you read between the lines, speak of a world ending calamity that would cause Vaccus to wake up, ect...
What I'm looking for help with is comming up with different pieces of art that will make the full puzzle. So like a poem tells part of one story, a description of a short film depicts another, a painting, children's book ect... I want at least 9 or so different pieces that can describe the reveal mentioned above with 1 for each worshiped god and the 9th being a description of creating a nightmare for Vaccus. The idea is that each description/art piece tells a different part of the same story, but the party won't get them in order. I have come up with some ideas for the different art pieces, but I want some more ideas or suggestions. I also want different people to give their descriptions and I feel that if it was just me making all of these descriptions, they would all feel way too similar and give off the feel of "one person trying 9 different mediums" than "9 different artists telling the same story". I have an idea for the 1st one chronologically that takes the form of a children's book that decribes a little boy who is tormented by his older siblings and thus escapes to his dreams to find friends (the other gods) and go on adventures. It would be unfinished with the party only finding the first few pages depicting the boy make the Gods Vita and Messor to populate the world and give life meaning. I plan on refining it a bit more and using more symbolism than what I described above but I think it gives the general idea.
Sorry for the long post, I've been thinking of this idea for a long time and only now the party is getting close enough to it for me to really start planning for it. TLDR; What are some different descriptions of art works (poems, stories, paintings ect...) that when put together tell the story of the world's creation and reveal the fact that the setting takes place in the dreams of an eldritch entity. I would love to hear what you all have to offer to this.
2024.05.16 16:25 brayvi shy or uninterested?
Mainly coming from my gut, F(20) it tells me this coworker has secretly been into me M(22). For a good 8 months.
Is that possible?
He’s a gentleman. Attempted to fix my tire and ended up giving me a ride home. I didn’t ask but I did complain a little about the stress and he offered his spare. Wasn’t compatible. So he offered a ride home.
Will be sweet at times and soft voiced. Very shy type, I low key or intimidate him in some way, hopefully in a positive light. He treats the others like homegirl/boys, but me, he stutters and breaks eye contact out of nervousness. We can’t even hold a conversation. If so, it’s forced and awkward.
I can tell he loves my eyes, by the way we just stare a little few seconds too long. Or maybe time just feels freezed. Our intense contrasting eye colors strangely intensifies the eye lock. He loves to take a good four seconds to respond before I ask him a question. Prolonged. Eye contact.
Got them just locked sometimes and its enough to leave me questioning, does he want me
Anyways, after my crush manifested I began to observe him a little.
He always needs to say bye to me. (Strange thing he does) compliments people around me when the compliment was obviously meant for me . Ex. said his homeboy smells like vanilla and has a mysterious aura. (I wear heavy vanilla perfume, i’m quiet asf and he isn’t gay just saying. His friend is the complete opposite as the description) BUT WHY if this is meant for me, is it said to his friend ?
Shy around only me. He treats me very different from others girls and easily chat up a storm. Funny enough, he’s a mute for the most part around me. He will talk confidently loud to his friends, but the moment I try to start a convo he cuts it short. And shows obvious signs of nervousness that wasn’t previously shown around the other girls.
The bad side of him is the jealousy i’ve noticed. Anytime we got new male coworkers he keeps me away after them, demanding me around if he noticed me talking to them. And giving me silent treatment after I talked to them.
Another strange thing he did was attempt to insult me if I somehow “hurt his feelings” Ex. I called him his brothers name on accident (they sound the same) and i didn’t apologize because social anxiety and busy w/ work during the shift.
And before he left to say goodbye he intentionally pauses long and turns staring at me stating “I forgot your name for like one second..” after saying my name like 10 times while demanding me the whole shift.
I can’t seem to understand why he got so upset over this? Was he being sarcastic? Why would he get that offended or petty? Does he like me?
Just weird part is we’ve been working together for almost 8 months now. Why no confession, I am just left with this agonizing gut feeling and a longing of just satisfying the tension in some way with an answer.
I know he thinks i’m cute , I think he’s cute. If he likes me he needs to grow pair, or stop with the unnecessary avoidance and random micro flirting. Hoping he’s just shy! But main question, why not make a move?
He does seem like the shy one, but still it’s driving me crazy wondering.
What do you think? Doesn’t like me? Does and is nervous? Please leave your ideas i’m confused. Need other view points, thank you
submitted by brayvi to Crushes [link] [comments]
Is that possible?
He’s a gentleman. Attempted to fix my tire and ended up giving me a ride home. I didn’t ask but I did complain a little about the stress and he offered his spare. Wasn’t compatible. So he offered a ride home.
Will be sweet at times and soft voiced. Very shy type, I low key or intimidate him in some way, hopefully in a positive light. He treats the others like homegirl/boys, but me, he stutters and breaks eye contact out of nervousness. We can’t even hold a conversation. If so, it’s forced and awkward.
I can tell he loves my eyes, by the way we just stare a little few seconds too long. Or maybe time just feels freezed. Our intense contrasting eye colors strangely intensifies the eye lock. He loves to take a good four seconds to respond before I ask him a question. Prolonged. Eye contact.
Got them just locked sometimes and its enough to leave me questioning, does he want me
Anyways, after my crush manifested I began to observe him a little.
He always needs to say bye to me. (Strange thing he does) compliments people around me when the compliment was obviously meant for me . Ex. said his homeboy smells like vanilla and has a mysterious aura. (I wear heavy vanilla perfume, i’m quiet asf and he isn’t gay just saying. His friend is the complete opposite as the description) BUT WHY if this is meant for me, is it said to his friend ?
Shy around only me. He treats me very different from others girls and easily chat up a storm. Funny enough, he’s a mute for the most part around me. He will talk confidently loud to his friends, but the moment I try to start a convo he cuts it short. And shows obvious signs of nervousness that wasn’t previously shown around the other girls.
The bad side of him is the jealousy i’ve noticed. Anytime we got new male coworkers he keeps me away after them, demanding me around if he noticed me talking to them. And giving me silent treatment after I talked to them.
Another strange thing he did was attempt to insult me if I somehow “hurt his feelings” Ex. I called him his brothers name on accident (they sound the same) and i didn’t apologize because social anxiety and busy w/ work during the shift.
And before he left to say goodbye he intentionally pauses long and turns staring at me stating “I forgot your name for like one second..” after saying my name like 10 times while demanding me the whole shift.
I can’t seem to understand why he got so upset over this? Was he being sarcastic? Why would he get that offended or petty? Does he like me?
Just weird part is we’ve been working together for almost 8 months now. Why no confession, I am just left with this agonizing gut feeling and a longing of just satisfying the tension in some way with an answer.
I know he thinks i’m cute , I think he’s cute. If he likes me he needs to grow pair, or stop with the unnecessary avoidance and random micro flirting. Hoping he’s just shy! But main question, why not make a move?
He does seem like the shy one, but still it’s driving me crazy wondering.
What do you think? Doesn’t like me? Does and is nervous? Please leave your ideas i’m confused. Need other view points, thank you
2024.05.16 16:16 brayvi shy or uninterested?
Mainly coming from my gut, F(20) it tells me this coworker has secretly been into me M(22). For a good 8 months.
Is that possible?
He’s a gentleman. Attempted to fix my tire and ended up giving me a ride home. I didn’t ask but I did complain a little about the stress and he offered his spare. Wasn’t compatible. So he offered a ride home.
Will be sweet at times and soft voiced. Very shy type, I low key or intimidate him in some way, hopefully in a positive light. He treats the others like homegirl/boys, but me, he stutters and breaks eye contact out of nervousness. We can’t even hold a conversation. If so, it’s forced and awkward.
I can tell he loves my eyes, by the way we just stare a little few seconds too long. Or maybe time just feels freezed. Our intense contrasting eye colors strangely intensifies the eye lock. He loves to take a good four seconds to respond before I ask him a question. Prolonged. Eye contact.
Got them just locked sometimes and its enough to leave me questioning, does he want me
Anyways, after my crush manifested I began to observe him a little.
He always needs to say bye to me. (Strange thing he does) compliments people around me when the compliment was obviously meant for me . Ex. said his homeboy smells like vanilla and has a mysterious aura. (I wear heavy vanilla perfume, i’m quiet asf and he isn’t gay just saying. His friend is the complete opposite as the description) BUT WHY if this is meant for me, is it said to his friend ?
Shy around only me. He treats me very different from others girls and easily chat up a storm. Funny enough, he’s a mute for the most part around me. He will talk confidently loud to his friends, but the moment I try to start a convo he cuts it short. And shows obvious signs of nervousness that wasn’t previously shown around the other girls.
The bad side of him is the jealousy i’ve noticed. Anytime we got new male coworkers he keeps me away after them, demanding me around if he noticed me talking to them. And giving me silent treatment after I talked to them.
Another strange thing he did was attempt to insult me if I somehow “hurt his feelings” Ex. I called him his brothers name on accident (they sound the same) and i didn’t apologize because social anxiety and busy w/ work during the shift.
And before he left to say goodbye he intentionally pauses long and turns staring at me stating “I forgot your name for like one second..” after saying my name like 10 times while demanding me the whole shift.
I can’t seem to understand why he got so upset over this? Was he being sarcastic? Why would he get that offended or petty? Does he like me?
Just weird part is we’ve been working together for almost 8 months now. Why no confession, I am just left with this agonizing gut feeling and a longing of just satisfying the tension in some way with an answer.
I know he thinks i’m cute , I think he’s cute. If he likes me he needs to grow pair, or stop with the unnecessary avoidance and random micro flirting. Hoping he’s just shy! But main question, why not make a move?
He does seem like the shy one, but still it’s driving me crazy wondering.
What do you think? Doesn’t like me? Does and is nervous? Please leave your ideas i’m confused. Need other view points, thank you
submitted by brayvi to dating [link] [comments]
Is that possible?
He’s a gentleman. Attempted to fix my tire and ended up giving me a ride home. I didn’t ask but I did complain a little about the stress and he offered his spare. Wasn’t compatible. So he offered a ride home.
Will be sweet at times and soft voiced. Very shy type, I low key or intimidate him in some way, hopefully in a positive light. He treats the others like homegirl/boys, but me, he stutters and breaks eye contact out of nervousness. We can’t even hold a conversation. If so, it’s forced and awkward.
I can tell he loves my eyes, by the way we just stare a little few seconds too long. Or maybe time just feels freezed. Our intense contrasting eye colors strangely intensifies the eye lock. He loves to take a good four seconds to respond before I ask him a question. Prolonged. Eye contact.
Got them just locked sometimes and its enough to leave me questioning, does he want me
Anyways, after my crush manifested I began to observe him a little.
He always needs to say bye to me. (Strange thing he does) compliments people around me when the compliment was obviously meant for me . Ex. said his homeboy smells like vanilla and has a mysterious aura. (I wear heavy vanilla perfume, i’m quiet asf and he isn’t gay just saying. His friend is the complete opposite as the description) BUT WHY if this is meant for me, is it said to his friend ?
Shy around only me. He treats me very different from others girls and easily chat up a storm. Funny enough, he’s a mute for the most part around me. He will talk confidently loud to his friends, but the moment I try to start a convo he cuts it short. And shows obvious signs of nervousness that wasn’t previously shown around the other girls.
The bad side of him is the jealousy i’ve noticed. Anytime we got new male coworkers he keeps me away after them, demanding me around if he noticed me talking to them. And giving me silent treatment after I talked to them.
Another strange thing he did was attempt to insult me if I somehow “hurt his feelings” Ex. I called him his brothers name on accident (they sound the same) and i didn’t apologize because social anxiety and busy w/ work during the shift.
And before he left to say goodbye he intentionally pauses long and turns staring at me stating “I forgot your name for like one second..” after saying my name like 10 times while demanding me the whole shift.
I can’t seem to understand why he got so upset over this? Was he being sarcastic? Why would he get that offended or petty? Does he like me?
Just weird part is we’ve been working together for almost 8 months now. Why no confession, I am just left with this agonizing gut feeling and a longing of just satisfying the tension in some way with an answer.
I know he thinks i’m cute , I think he’s cute. If he likes me he needs to grow pair, or stop with the unnecessary avoidance and random micro flirting. Hoping he’s just shy! But main question, why not make a move?
He does seem like the shy one, but still it’s driving me crazy wondering.
What do you think? Doesn’t like me? Does and is nervous? Please leave your ideas i’m confused. Need other view points, thank you
2024.05.16 16:16 korea_butterpang Dealing with nightmare #buldak sleeping pills #shorts #funny #viral
 | submitted by korea_butterpang to u/korea_butterpang [link] [comments] |
2024.05.16 16:15 Cerulyan_ Story from WHAP test yesterday + thoughts on the thing
Okay, so WHAP test yesterday, didn’t study (never studied in my life, don’t even know how if I tried), literally the easiest shit ever. Like, that one mcq with the account from the guy in Auschwitz where it literally said “Auschwitz” in the source info only for the question to be “what event is this from?” Like what??? 😭😭😭 I legit read through the passage and everything even though I knew the answer because I thought there was a trick because it was too easy. I took the APGOV test last year, a class I literally SLEPT IN and did zero hw for to get a three, once again, zero studying, so I have to be guaranteed a four for WHAP. Not to mention that I’m also more confident in WH in general. Then again, the test is probably going to be curved like crazy this year.
Okay funny story time: In the aux gym at 7:30 am, chilling until the test starts at 8. No joke, 3 minutes into the test the girl at the desk next to me has her head down passed out. Like she has to have answered probably only like 3-5 (maybe less) questions. This is the mcq btw. Anyways, AT LEAST 5 times the proctor goes over to her in an attempt to wake her up, only for her to go back to sleep. Sleeps through the entire mcq and when she turned her test in there was legit like nothing bubbled in on the back. 😭 Start the short response with the a, b, and c parts only for her to sleep for the first 20 minutes. Thankfully she did some of the short answer after those 20 minutes and all of part 2 (the essays) but she better have taken the test for free or else her parents are gonna be pissed. (If you get good state test scores here you cant take ap tests for free)
Sorry for the wall of text. TL;DR: Test was easy af and a girl slept through like half the test.
submitted by Cerulyan_ to APStudents [link] [comments]
Okay funny story time: In the aux gym at 7:30 am, chilling until the test starts at 8. No joke, 3 minutes into the test the girl at the desk next to me has her head down passed out. Like she has to have answered probably only like 3-5 (maybe less) questions. This is the mcq btw. Anyways, AT LEAST 5 times the proctor goes over to her in an attempt to wake her up, only for her to go back to sleep. Sleeps through the entire mcq and when she turned her test in there was legit like nothing bubbled in on the back. 😭 Start the short response with the a, b, and c parts only for her to sleep for the first 20 minutes. Thankfully she did some of the short answer after those 20 minutes and all of part 2 (the essays) but she better have taken the test for free or else her parents are gonna be pissed. (If you get good state test scores here you cant take ap tests for free)
Sorry for the wall of text. TL;DR: Test was easy af and a girl slept through like half the test.
2024.05.16 16:14 tacostand247 I [18F] am debating whether I want to be in a long term relationship with my boyfriend [19M]. Advice?
First, I'll start by saying this is both myself [18F] and my boyfriend's [19M] first serious relationship. We've been together for 7 months now and are both content with each other and what our future goals are. We are about to be long-distance, I'm moving about 2 hours away for college in the fall, and then my sophomore year he's transferring to a 4 year college about an hour away from mine. While I love my bf as a person, recently I have been having doubts as to whether I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I know we're young and the relationship is fairly new, but we've had candid conversations about what we want in life (career wise), and how our relationship will fit into all of that. However, we both have different personalities, which has led me to question whether I could remain content in our relationship in the future.
I am a talker. I always have been. I love to talk about anything and I love to have long conversations. It's fun to me and helps me feel more connected to whoever I'm with. However he is not. He's a thinker. He doesn't talk much. When I try to make conversation, he shuts me down or gives me one worded responses and when he finally does feel in the mood to talk, it feels almost as if I'm forcing him to. He also has an issue of opening up to me. Again he is a thinker, so the way he works through things is by being alone and thinking through them. But he has this bad habit of having things bother him, sometimes things that I have done to him, but I won't know about it until like 2+ weeks after, where he brings it up casually in conversation. By that point he has already worked through it so it doesn't bother him, but it bothers me because I feel like I haven't gotten the chance to process it or talk about it with him. I also don't feel like our conversations have much substance to them, or are very long. He's not that social, he much prefers to stay at home and play video games while I like to go out and do things. When we hang out, it's usually in his room and we end up falling asleep or being on our phones and not talking with each other. That's fine to an extent, but I grown bored of our routine and want more.
He's also not that thoughtful. He has short term memory issues so there's that, but also the level of thoughtfulness I want from him is just not there. There's no specific example I can think of off the top of my head, but I know sometimes I feel like he's not doing enough. I understand that it's unfair to him for me to place high expectations on him as such a young age since this is all new to him as well, but I was raised to believe that I deserve to be with a man I can count on, that could help me with whatever I need and that values me.
Part of me understands that a lot of my gripes towards my relationship are directly tied to our age and where we are in life. He does not have the knowledge nor resources to do some of the things I would like from him. As we grow and mature, most likely some of my problems will sort themselves out. I don't want to paint a bad picture here. I love my boyfriend. He is extremely affectionate and loves physical touch. He loves my presence and being around me. He's silly and funny and has such a good heart. I love having him in my life. But the path our relationship is on right now, I feel like I would become bored of it. Any advice?
submitted by tacostand247 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
I am a talker. I always have been. I love to talk about anything and I love to have long conversations. It's fun to me and helps me feel more connected to whoever I'm with. However he is not. He's a thinker. He doesn't talk much. When I try to make conversation, he shuts me down or gives me one worded responses and when he finally does feel in the mood to talk, it feels almost as if I'm forcing him to. He also has an issue of opening up to me. Again he is a thinker, so the way he works through things is by being alone and thinking through them. But he has this bad habit of having things bother him, sometimes things that I have done to him, but I won't know about it until like 2+ weeks after, where he brings it up casually in conversation. By that point he has already worked through it so it doesn't bother him, but it bothers me because I feel like I haven't gotten the chance to process it or talk about it with him. I also don't feel like our conversations have much substance to them, or are very long. He's not that social, he much prefers to stay at home and play video games while I like to go out and do things. When we hang out, it's usually in his room and we end up falling asleep or being on our phones and not talking with each other. That's fine to an extent, but I grown bored of our routine and want more.
He's also not that thoughtful. He has short term memory issues so there's that, but also the level of thoughtfulness I want from him is just not there. There's no specific example I can think of off the top of my head, but I know sometimes I feel like he's not doing enough. I understand that it's unfair to him for me to place high expectations on him as such a young age since this is all new to him as well, but I was raised to believe that I deserve to be with a man I can count on, that could help me with whatever I need and that values me.
Part of me understands that a lot of my gripes towards my relationship are directly tied to our age and where we are in life. He does not have the knowledge nor resources to do some of the things I would like from him. As we grow and mature, most likely some of my problems will sort themselves out. I don't want to paint a bad picture here. I love my boyfriend. He is extremely affectionate and loves physical touch. He loves my presence and being around me. He's silly and funny and has such a good heart. I love having him in my life. But the path our relationship is on right now, I feel like I would become bored of it. Any advice?
2024.05.16 16:13 adulting4kids Obscure Literary Devices for Sixth Grade Students
Lesson Plan: Exploring Exciting Language Tricks
I. Introduction A. What Are Special Language Tricks? B. Why Do Authors Use Them? C. Today's Fun Journey: Discovering Language Magic!
II. Epistrophe: Echoing Words for Effect A. Definition: Repeating Words at the End B. Example: "Friends, friends, friends, we will always be friends." C. Activity: Find Repetition in a Short Poem Together
III. Anadiplosis: Building Word Bridges A. Definition: Repeating the Last Word at the Beginning B. Example: "Hope leads to dreams; dreams lead to possibilities." C. Activity: Build Your Own Sentences with a Word Bridge
IV. Aposiopesis: The Suspenseful Pause A. Definition: Leaving a Sentence Unfinished B. Example: "I was so excited, but then—" C. Activity: Create Your Own Suspenseful Dialogues
V. Epizeuxis: The Power of Repeat Power A. Definition: Repeating a Word for Emphasis B. Example: "Never, never, give up!" C. Activity: Boost Your Message with Repeat Power
VI. Chiasmus: Mirror, Mirror on the Sentence A. Definition: Flipping Words to Create Balance B. Example: "Reading books is enjoyable; enjoyable is reading books." C. Activity: Make a Balanced Sentence Mirror
VII. Enjambment: Words Skipping Happily Along A. Definition: Sentences Skipping Over Lines B. Example: "I skipped down the road,\nLaughing all the way." C. Activity: Create a Skip-and-Jump Poem
VIII. Paraprosdokian: The Sentence Surprise A. Definition: Ending a Sentence with a Twist B. Example: "I wanted a pet, so I got a fish, but now it barks!" C. Activity: Surprise Your Friends with Funny Sentences
IX. Anaphora: Friends, Friends Everywhere A. Definition: Repeating Words at the Beginning B. Example: "I love playing; I love learning; I love laughing." C. Activity: Share What You Love with Anaphora
X. Hendiadys: Two Words, Double Fun A. Definition: Using Two Words for One Idea B. Example: "Jump and dance, not sit and watch." C. Activity: Mix and Match Words for Fun Expressions
XI. Litotes: Saying More with Less A. Definition: Making a Situation Sound Less B. Example: "The homework wasn't too tricky." C. Activity: Describe Your Day with a Touch of Modesty
XII. Conclusion: Language Magic Recap A. Fun Recap of Our Language Tricks B. Exciting Homework: Pick Your Favorite Trick and Use It in a Short Story or Poem!
This toned-down lesson plan aims to introduce sixth-grade students to literary devices in a playful and engaging manner, encouraging them to experiment with language tricks in their own creative expressions.
submitted by adulting4kids to writingthruit [link] [comments]
I. Introduction A. What Are Special Language Tricks? B. Why Do Authors Use Them? C. Today's Fun Journey: Discovering Language Magic!
II. Epistrophe: Echoing Words for Effect A. Definition: Repeating Words at the End B. Example: "Friends, friends, friends, we will always be friends." C. Activity: Find Repetition in a Short Poem Together
III. Anadiplosis: Building Word Bridges A. Definition: Repeating the Last Word at the Beginning B. Example: "Hope leads to dreams; dreams lead to possibilities." C. Activity: Build Your Own Sentences with a Word Bridge
IV. Aposiopesis: The Suspenseful Pause A. Definition: Leaving a Sentence Unfinished B. Example: "I was so excited, but then—" C. Activity: Create Your Own Suspenseful Dialogues
V. Epizeuxis: The Power of Repeat Power A. Definition: Repeating a Word for Emphasis B. Example: "Never, never, give up!" C. Activity: Boost Your Message with Repeat Power
VI. Chiasmus: Mirror, Mirror on the Sentence A. Definition: Flipping Words to Create Balance B. Example: "Reading books is enjoyable; enjoyable is reading books." C. Activity: Make a Balanced Sentence Mirror
VII. Enjambment: Words Skipping Happily Along A. Definition: Sentences Skipping Over Lines B. Example: "I skipped down the road,\nLaughing all the way." C. Activity: Create a Skip-and-Jump Poem
VIII. Paraprosdokian: The Sentence Surprise A. Definition: Ending a Sentence with a Twist B. Example: "I wanted a pet, so I got a fish, but now it barks!" C. Activity: Surprise Your Friends with Funny Sentences
IX. Anaphora: Friends, Friends Everywhere A. Definition: Repeating Words at the Beginning B. Example: "I love playing; I love learning; I love laughing." C. Activity: Share What You Love with Anaphora
X. Hendiadys: Two Words, Double Fun A. Definition: Using Two Words for One Idea B. Example: "Jump and dance, not sit and watch." C. Activity: Mix and Match Words for Fun Expressions
XI. Litotes: Saying More with Less A. Definition: Making a Situation Sound Less B. Example: "The homework wasn't too tricky." C. Activity: Describe Your Day with a Touch of Modesty
XII. Conclusion: Language Magic Recap A. Fun Recap of Our Language Tricks B. Exciting Homework: Pick Your Favorite Trick and Use It in a Short Story or Poem!
This toned-down lesson plan aims to introduce sixth-grade students to literary devices in a playful and engaging manner, encouraging them to experiment with language tricks in their own creative expressions.
2024.05.16 16:08 moneyfollowd shy or uninterested?
shy or uninterested?
games playing or shy?
Mainly coming from my gut, F(20) it tells me this coworker has secretly been into me M(22). For a good 8 months.
Is that possible?
He’s a gentleman. Attempted to fix my tire and ended up giving me a ride home. I didn’t ask but I did complain a little about the stress and he offered his spare. Wasn’t compatible. So he offered a ride home.
Will be sweet at times and soft voiced. Very shy type, I low key or intimidate him in some way, hopefully in a positive light. He treats the others like homegirl/boys, but me, he stutters and breaks eye contact out of nervousness. We can’t even hold a conversation. If so, it’s forced and awkward.
I can tell he loves my eyes, by the way we just stare a little few seconds too long. Or maybe time just feels freezed. Our intense contrasting eye colors strangely intensifies the eye lock. He loves to take a good four seconds to respond before I ask him a question. Prolonged. Eye contact.
Got them just locked sometimes and its enough to leave me questioning, does he want me
Anyways, after my crush manifested I began to observe him a little.
He always needs to say bye to me. (Strange thing he does) compliments people around me when the compliment was obviously meant for me . Ex. said his homeboy smells like vanilla and has a mysterious aura. (I wear heavy vanilla perfume, i’m quiet asf and he isn’t gay just saying. His friend is the complete opposite as the description) BUT WHY if this is meant for me, is it said to his friend ?
Shy around only me. He treats me very different from others girls and easily chat up a storm. Funny enough, he’s a mute for the most part around me. He will talk confidently loud to his friends, but the moment I try to start a convo he cuts it short. And shows obvious signs of nervousness that wasn’t previously shown around the other girls.
The bad side of him is the jealousy i’ve noticed. Anytime we got new male coworkers he keeps me away after them, demanding me around if he noticed me talking to them. And giving me silent treatment after I talked to them.
Another strange thing he did was attempt to insult me if I somehow “hurt his feelings” Ex. I called him his brothers name on accident (they sound the same) and i didn’t apologize because social anxiety and busy w/ work during the shift.
And before he left to say goodbye he intentionally pauses long and turns staring at me stating “I forgot your name for like one second..” after saying my name like 10 times while demanding me the whole shift.
I can’t seem to understand why he got so upset over this? Was he being sarcastic? Why would he get that offended or petty? Does he like me?
Just weird part is we’ve been working together for almost 8 months now. Why no confession, I am just left with this agonizing gut feeling and a longing of just satisfying the tension in some way with an answer.
I know he thinks i’m cute , I think he’s cute. If he likes me he needs to grow pair, or stop with the unnecessary avoidance and random micro flirting. Hoping he’s just shy! But main question, why not make a move?
He does seem like the shy one, but still it’s driving me crazy wondering.
What do you think? Doesn’t like me? Does and is nervous? Please leave your ideas i’m confused. Need other view points, thank you
submitted by moneyfollowd to Advice [link] [comments]
games playing or shy?
Mainly coming from my gut, F(20) it tells me this coworker has secretly been into me M(22). For a good 8 months.
Is that possible?
He’s a gentleman. Attempted to fix my tire and ended up giving me a ride home. I didn’t ask but I did complain a little about the stress and he offered his spare. Wasn’t compatible. So he offered a ride home.
Will be sweet at times and soft voiced. Very shy type, I low key or intimidate him in some way, hopefully in a positive light. He treats the others like homegirl/boys, but me, he stutters and breaks eye contact out of nervousness. We can’t even hold a conversation. If so, it’s forced and awkward.
I can tell he loves my eyes, by the way we just stare a little few seconds too long. Or maybe time just feels freezed. Our intense contrasting eye colors strangely intensifies the eye lock. He loves to take a good four seconds to respond before I ask him a question. Prolonged. Eye contact.
Got them just locked sometimes and its enough to leave me questioning, does he want me
Anyways, after my crush manifested I began to observe him a little.
He always needs to say bye to me. (Strange thing he does) compliments people around me when the compliment was obviously meant for me . Ex. said his homeboy smells like vanilla and has a mysterious aura. (I wear heavy vanilla perfume, i’m quiet asf and he isn’t gay just saying. His friend is the complete opposite as the description) BUT WHY if this is meant for me, is it said to his friend ?
Shy around only me. He treats me very different from others girls and easily chat up a storm. Funny enough, he’s a mute for the most part around me. He will talk confidently loud to his friends, but the moment I try to start a convo he cuts it short. And shows obvious signs of nervousness that wasn’t previously shown around the other girls.
The bad side of him is the jealousy i’ve noticed. Anytime we got new male coworkers he keeps me away after them, demanding me around if he noticed me talking to them. And giving me silent treatment after I talked to them.
Another strange thing he did was attempt to insult me if I somehow “hurt his feelings” Ex. I called him his brothers name on accident (they sound the same) and i didn’t apologize because social anxiety and busy w/ work during the shift.
And before he left to say goodbye he intentionally pauses long and turns staring at me stating “I forgot your name for like one second..” after saying my name like 10 times while demanding me the whole shift.
I can’t seem to understand why he got so upset over this? Was he being sarcastic? Why would he get that offended or petty? Does he like me?
Just weird part is we’ve been working together for almost 8 months now. Why no confession, I am just left with this agonizing gut feeling and a longing of just satisfying the tension in some way with an answer.
I know he thinks i’m cute , I think he’s cute. If he likes me he needs to grow pair, or stop with the unnecessary avoidance and random micro flirting. Hoping he’s just shy! But main question, why not make a move?
He does seem like the shy one, but still it’s driving me crazy wondering.
What do you think? Doesn’t like me? Does and is nervous? Please leave your ideas i’m confused. Need other view points, thank you