Hello there! I am a remote worker offering my services as a Virtual Assistant. With my skills and experience, I can assist you with various tasks to lighten your workload. Here is a list of tasks I can help you with:

• Data entry: I can efficiently handle data entry tasks, ensuring accuracy and attention to detail.
• Transcribing: I am proficient in transcribing audio and video files into written documents.
• Translating (English <-> Spanish): I am fluent in both English and Spanish and can assist with translations between these languages.
• QA Testing: I have experience in quality assurance testing to help ensure your products or services meet high standards.
• Social Media Management: I can manage your social media accounts, create content, schedule posts, and engage with your audience.
• Email Management: I can handle your email correspondence, organize your inbox, and respond to inquiries.
• Live Chat Support: I am skilled in providing real-time customer support through live chat platforms.
• Web Research: I can conduct thorough research on various topics and provide you with well-organized summaries.
• SEO: I have knowledge of search engine optimization techniques to help improve your website's visibility.
• Technical and Customer Support: I can assist your customers with technical issues or general inquiries.
• Dropshipping Knowledge: I am familiar with dropshipping and can help you manage your dropshipping business.
• Any other work: If you have any other tasks not mentioned above, feel free to discuss them with me.

Here is a list of software I am proficient in:

• Shopify, Aliexpress, Oberlo: I can assist you with managing your online store, product sourcing, and order fulfillment.
• Zendesk: I can efficiently handle customer support tickets and provide excellent service.
• WordPress, WooCommerce: I have experience in managing WordPress websites and setting up online stores using WooCommerce.
• Slack, Skype: I am comfortable using these communication tools to collaborate with you and your team.
• Word, Excel: I can create and edit documents, spreadsheets, and reports using these Microsoft Office tools.
• Google Docs, Sheets: I am familiar with Google's productivity suite and can work on documents and spreadsheets online.
• Asana, Harvest: I can use these project management tools to stay organized and track tasks.
• Zopim: I have experience using Zopim live chat software to provide real-time support.

Thank you, and I look forward to working with you!

Hello there! I am a remote worker offering my services as a Virtual Assistant. With my skills and experience, I can assist you with various tasks to lighten your workload. Here is a list of tasks I can help you with:

• Data entry: I can efficiently handle data entry tasks, ensuring accuracy and attention to detail.
• Transcribing: I am proficient in transcribing audio and video files into written documents.
• Translating (English <-> Spanish): I am fluent in both English and Spanish and can assist with translations between these languages.
• QA Testing: I have experience in quality assurance testing to help ensure your products or services meet high standards.
• Social Media Management: I can manage your social media accounts, create content, schedule posts, and engage with your audience.
• Email Management: I can handle your email correspondence, organize your inbox, and respond to inquiries.
• Live Chat Support: I am skilled in providing real-time customer support through live chat platforms.
• Web Research: I can conduct thorough research on various topics and provide you with well-organized summaries.
• SEO: I have knowledge of search engine optimization techniques to help improve your website's visibility.
• Technical and Customer Support: I can assist your customers with technical issues or general inquiries.
• Dropshipping Knowledge: I am familiar with dropshipping and can help you manage your dropshipping business.
• Any other work: If you have any other tasks not mentioned above, feel free to discuss them with me.

Here is a list of software I am proficient in:

• Shopify, Aliexpress, Oberlo: I can assist you with managing your online store, product sourcing, and order fulfillment.
• Zendesk: I can efficiently handle customer support tickets and provide excellent service.
• WordPress, WooCommerce: I have experience in managing WordPress websites and setting up online stores using WooCommerce.
• Slack, Skype: I am comfortable using these communication tools to collaborate with you and your team.
• Word, Excel: I can create and edit documents, spreadsheets, and reports using these Microsoft Office tools.
• Google Docs, Sheets: I am familiar with Google's productivity suite and can work on documents and spreadsheets online.
• Asana, Harvest: I can use these project management tools to stay organized and track tasks.
• Zopim: I have experience using Zopim live chat software to provide real-time support.

Thank you, and I look forward to working with you!

Hello there! I am a remote worker offering my services as a Virtual Assistant. With my skills and experience, I can assist you with various tasks to lighten your workload. Here is a list of tasks I can help you with:

• Data entry: I can efficiently handle data entry tasks, ensuring accuracy and attention to detail.
• Transcribing: I am proficient in transcribing audio and video files into written documents.
• Translating (English <-> Spanish): I am fluent in both English and Spanish and can assist with translations between these languages.
• QA Testing: I have experience in quality assurance testing to help ensure your products or services meet high standards.
• Social Media Management: I can manage your social media accounts, create content, schedule posts, and engage with your audience.
• Email Management: I can handle your email correspondence, organize your inbox, and respond to inquiries.
• Live Chat Support: I am skilled in providing real-time customer support through live chat platforms.
• Web Research: I can conduct thorough research on various topics and provide you with well-organized summaries.
• SEO: I have knowledge of search engine optimization techniques to help improve your website's visibility.
• Technical and Customer Support: I can assist your customers with technical issues or general inquiries.
• Dropshipping Knowledge: I am familiar with dropshipping and can help you manage your dropshipping business.
• Any other work: If you have any other tasks not mentioned above, feel free to discuss them with me.

Here is a list of software I am proficient in:

• Shopify, Aliexpress, Oberlo: I can assist you with managing your online store, product sourcing, and order fulfillment.
• Zendesk: I can efficiently handle customer support tickets and provide excellent service.
• WordPress, WooCommerce: I have experience in managing WordPress websites and setting up online stores using WooCommerce.
• Slack, Skype: I am comfortable using these communication tools to collaborate with you and your team.
• Word, Excel: I can create and edit documents, spreadsheets, and reports using these Microsoft Office tools.
• Google Docs, Sheets: I am familiar with Google's productivity suite and can work on documents and spreadsheets online.
• Asana, Harvest: I can use these project management tools to stay organized and track tasks.
• Zopim: I have experience using Zopim live chat software to provide real-time support.

Thank you, and I look forward to working with you!

Hello there! I am a remote worker offering my services as a Virtual Assistant. With my skills and experience, I can assist you with various tasks to lighten your workload. Here is a list of tasks I can help you with:

• Data entry: I can efficiently handle data entry tasks, ensuring accuracy and attention to detail.
• Transcribing: I am proficient in transcribing audio and video files into written documents.
• Translating (English <-> Spanish): I am fluent in both English and Spanish and can assist with translations between these languages.
• QA Testing: I have experience in quality assurance testing to help ensure your products or services meet high standards.
• Social Media Management: I can manage your social media accounts, create content, schedule posts, and engage with your audience.
• Email Management: I can handle your email correspondence, organize your inbox, and respond to inquiries.
• Live Chat Support: I am skilled in providing real-time customer support through live chat platforms.
• Web Research: I can conduct thorough research on various topics and provide you with well-organized summaries.
• SEO: I have knowledge of search engine optimization techniques to help improve your website's visibility.
• Technical and Customer Support: I can assist your customers with technical issues or general inquiries.
• Dropshipping Knowledge: I am familiar with dropshipping and can help you manage your dropshipping business.
• Any other work: If you have any other tasks not mentioned above, feel free to discuss them with me.

Here is a list of software I am proficient in:

• Shopify, Aliexpress, Oberlo: I can assist you with managing your online store, product sourcing, and order fulfillment.
• Zendesk: I can efficiently handle customer support tickets and provide excellent service.
• WordPress, WooCommerce: I have experience in managing WordPress websites and setting up online stores using WooCommerce.
• Slack, Skype: I am comfortable using these communication tools to collaborate with you and your team.
• Word, Excel: I can create and edit documents, spreadsheets, and reports using these Microsoft Office tools.
• Google Docs, Sheets: I am familiar with Google's productivity suite and can work on documents and spreadsheets online.
• Asana, Harvest: I can use these project management tools to stay organized and track tasks.
• Zopim: I have experience using Zopim live chat software to provide real-time support.

Thank you, and I look forward to working with you!

Hello there! I am a remote worker offering my services as a Virtual Assistant. With my skills and experience, I can assist you with various tasks to lighten your workload. Here is a list of tasks I can help you with:

• Data entry: I can efficiently handle data entry tasks, ensuring accuracy and attention to detail.
• Transcribing: I am proficient in transcribing audio and video files into written documents.
• Translating (English <-> Spanish): I am fluent in both English and Spanish and can assist with translations between these languages.
• QA Testing: I have experience in quality assurance testing to help ensure your products or services meet high standards.
• Social Media Management: I can manage your social media accounts, create content, schedule posts, and engage with your audience.
• Email Management: I can handle your email correspondence, organize your inbox, and respond to inquiries.
• Live Chat Support: I am skilled in providing real-time customer support through live chat platforms.
• Web Research: I can conduct thorough research on various topics and provide you with well-organized summaries.
• SEO: I have knowledge of search engine optimization techniques to help improve your website's visibility.
• Technical and Customer Support: I can assist your customers with technical issues or general inquiries.
• Dropshipping Knowledge: I am familiar with dropshipping and can help you manage your dropshipping business.
• Any other work: If you have any other tasks not mentioned above, feel free to discuss them with me.

Here is a list of software I am proficient in:

• Shopify, Aliexpress, Oberlo: I can assist you with managing your online store, product sourcing, and order fulfillment.
• Zendesk: I can efficiently handle customer support tickets and provide excellent service.
• WordPress, WooCommerce: I have experience in managing WordPress websites and setting up online stores using WooCommerce.
• Slack, Skype: I am comfortable using these communication tools to collaborate with you and your team.
• Word, Excel: I can create and edit documents, spreadsheets, and reports using these Microsoft Office tools.
• Google Docs, Sheets: I am familiar with Google's productivity suite and can work on documents and spreadsheets online.
• Asana, Harvest: I can use these project management tools to stay organized and track tasks.
• Zopim: I have experience using Zopim live chat software to provide real-time support.

Thank you, and I look forward to working with you!

Hey all. I was told about the sub by a kind redditor. I'm lost, and have zero support in real life, so I'm here in hopes of just finding people who understand I guess, or that will at least let me ramble.
I lost my daughter last week to suicide. She was only 15. She was such an amazing girl (there's pics in my profile). She was smart, funny, kind, beautiful, so artistic, a talented singer and dancer, and she was such a huge part of me. She was my mini-me. My other two look like my late husband, which is fine of course, but she loved throwing up that SHE was my little clone.
My kids have been through it in their short lives. I don't want to ramble too much about the past, but to sum it up, my husband passed away from complications due to the flu in 2017. I raised the kids alone since. I have all the kids in therapy monthly/bi-weekly, and we have a great open line of communication, or so I thought.
She was suffering in silence with problems at school. She was being harassed by a group of girls, picked on by a group of guys, and just couldn't escape it. She thought she found the way out. I wish she had told me. I just wish she had given me a clue. Something.
I feel like I completely missed all of this. I should have stopped it. I should have protected her. She told me afterwards that she didn't want to add any stress on me, and it broke my heart. I would have taken ALLLL the stress to save her. Gladly.
She survived her attempt for nearly 6 weeks, but she did major damage to her heart and other organs, and in the end, they just couldn't reverse it. I think that's made it harder for me. She was seeing that it was a mistake. She was seeing that there were other options. But it was too late.
How the hell do I move forward? What do I do? My other two kids are so broken, and I'm shattered into pieces. We have lost all our family, and most of our "friends" are staying away. I think they just don't know what to say.
I haven't even finished planning her funeral. Between the financial aspect, and just being mentally able to do it, it's taking a while. I keep having people ask, over and over, and I just want to scream. Part of me isn't even ready to say good-bye. I can pretend this is all a nightmare right now. Maybe I will wake up?
I lost my uncle to suicide when I was 16, so this isn't the first loved one I've lost senselessly, but he had medical issues, marital issues, and "real" problems. He was facing life in a wheelchair. My Emmie was facing a beautiful future. She had her whole life ahead of her. I feel like such a worthless failure of a parent.
Anyways, if you read this far, I'm sorry for all the words, but thank you for taking the time to hear me out. I know it's going to be rough for the foreseeable future, so I'm glad I found you guys.

William was just about to scoop another mouthful of porridge and berries into his mouth when someone scooted into the seat next to him.
“Marline.” He inclined his head before returning to breakfast.
A breakfast that, prior to his teammate’s arrival, had been blissfully free of noise or interruption.
Which made sense given that the ‘rise and shine’ bell wasn’t going to ring for another thirty minutes or so. To that end, the cafeteria was near empty, but for a few servants flitting around the place as they set tables or partook of their own breakfasts.
Breakfasts that were something of a step down from what was normally served at these tables, given that the usual heaped piles of hot sausages, crisp bacon and hearty eggs were still being prepared in the kitchens.
Still, on this occasion, that was fine by William. Sure, the main reason he’d told his team to rise a little earlier than normal was to allow them to dine in peace without being harassed by the rest of the rumour hungry student body, but it was also useful in that it somewhat limited some of his more… difficult teammate’s breakfast options.
“William,” the dark elf hissed as she leaned down. “We have a problem.”
Despite his early morning lethargy, those words managed to send something akin to a shiver up his spine.
“What!? What’s the problem?” he asked as he whirled around, remembering only at the last minute to keep his voice down.
Sure, the cafeteria was relatively empty of both staff and students, but it hadn’t escaped his notice that pretty much all of them had had their eyes on him since he sat down.
“What do you mean, ‘what’s the problem?’” Marline whispered furiously into his ear. “The fucking alchemy lab blew up last night.”
“Oh, that.” She’d gotten him all worked up for nothing. “Someone’s enchantment probably went awry after being kept in storage too long.”
That was a lie and they both knew it. He’d explained to Marline in great detail why trying to gain access to his storage room was a poor idea without him present. To that end, it was obvious that someone had attempted just that.
As such, the old alchemy building was now a smouldering ruin, with dozens of academy guards and at least one member of the palace guard sifting through the rubble when he walked past.
Or at least, they’d been watching over a dozen menial servants as they sifted through the rubble.
Still, no one had been too alarmed by it. It was hardly the first time the building had been destroyed after all.
Alchemy was by its nature a fairly dangerous art.
A form of homeopathic magic that attempted to imbue objects with magical abilities by combining them with conceptually similar items, it tended to both be prohibitively expensive and notoriously unreliable.
Left eyes from forty-year-old salamanders didn’t grow on trees after all. Nor testicles from albino bulls in heat. And that was the kind of specificity one needed to create a half-decent stamina potion.
There was a reason that alchemy was gradually being phased out in favour of the slower but more reliable art of enchanting.
“Yes, very unfortunate,” Marline said through gritted teeth. “But what about ‘our’ ingredients that were being kept in the building. It might be… dangerous of someone stumbled across them in the rubble.”
Dangerous? Gunpower couldn’t explode more than…
“Oh, you’re talking about the gift we were holding for your family?” He realized.
“Yes!”
“Why didn’t you check last night?” he asked.
“...I tend to wear earplugs when I sleep,” Marline admitted reluctantly. “Given… Verity.”
William glanced towards the young woman’s long elven ears and thought about their orcish teammate’s tendency to snore like she was trying to wake the dead. The inner walls of their dorm weren’t particularly thick and Marline’s room was right next to the other girl’s.
Yeah, he could see why she might have invested in some hearing protection.
A decent set of earplugs wouldn’t drown out the noise of the morning bell, but they’d be more than capable of drowning out the distant whumph of an alchemy lab going up on the opposite side of the campus.
He momentarily wondered if the noise had caused any of his other teammates to get up, before dismissing the idea.
Strange noises in the middle of the night were far from unusual in a military academy and usually best ignored unless you had a very good reason to think they might involve you.
“Well, it’s not a problem,” he whispered. “I moved it last night before heading back to the dorm.”
The look of relief on the dark elf’s face was palpable, before it gave way to confusion. “Why?”
He shrugged. “For the same reason I booby-trapped the storage room in the first place. Once it got out that I had a mithril core – and might have had something to do with Al’Hundra’s death, well it seemed like there was a decent chance someone might go snooping around places I might want to hide something.”
And the alchemy lab was just about the first place someone would think of right after their team’s dorm room.
Fortunately for him, there were a few places that were quite impractical for hiding something long-term, but pretty ideal in the short term.
And just so long as Marline’s aunts arrived before next Welday, the mithril core would be safe.
Though as he gazed down at the bowl of porridge in front of him, he found his appetite wasn’t quite what it had been just a few moments ago.
“So where’d you hide it?” Marline asked excitedly, clearly relieved that her family’s future wasn’t currently buried in rubble.
William paused as he considered how to answer that question. Something his teammate was quick to notice.
“William,” she prompted. “Where’s my family’s core?”
He gazed down at his bowl, still thinking.
“William!” she shouted as best she could while still whispering.
“The safest place I could think of. Somewhere it’d be covered completely and no one would voluntarily look.”
“Voluntarily?” Marline said. “Covered?”
Credit where credit was due, no one had ever accused his teammate of being slow on the uptake. At least, where politics wasn’t concerned. So it was that it wasn’t long before he witnessed her expression morph from confusion to horror… to rage.
“You buried my family’s mithril core in the latrines?!” she hissed.
William scratched his chin awkwardly as he avoided her furious gaze. “More like dropped. I didn’t need to bury it because it sank on its own. Which is good given I wasn’t quite sure of the relative buoyancy of mithril in… well… you know.”
In his defence, it had seemed like a good idea at the time. Indeed, if one were to be purely objective about the whole thing, it still was. The core was safely hidden at the bottom of one of the lesser used latrine pits. The bottom mounted… storage vats of which were pulled out and emptied into the bay once a week.
It was a fairly old fashioned system, given the existence of indoor plumbing across the rest of the academy. Indeed, he suspected the latrines were only kept around to serve as a form of punishment duty for any cadets that happened to royally piss off their instructors.
“They’ll be safe there until Welday,” William argued weakly. “At which point your aunts can collect them without anyone being the wiser.”
“Collect them from the latrine’s storage vats!” Marline hissed, slamming her head into the table. “Ancestors, the future of our house is now literally swimming in shit.”
Gingerly, William moved to pat the dark elf on the back. “Ah, but at least it’s safe.”
Once more he glanced away as two silver eyes peeked out angrily from between the girl’s arms.
Needless to say, he was rather glad for the eventual arrival of the rest of their team – even if Bonnlyn chose to complain at length about the fact that she was going to be forced to dine on ‘twigs and berries’ – as opposed to the gut busting pile of vaguely food shaped grease she normally chose to partake of in a morning.
Still, at least Marline had stopped glaring at him by the time they’d all finished eating – escaping just before the first of their fellow cadets piled noisily into the cafeteria.


It was actually rather amusing, that for all that the coming match had obvious implications for the country as a whole, in theory it was simply another practice match between two groups of cadets.
To that end, there was no great ceremony as the members of Team Seven made their way through the double doors leading to the Floats. There, as per usual, stood the members of the opposing team along with an Instructor from a ‘neutral’ house.
Never mind that the great bleachers to each side of the faux-ships were filled with eager spectators when they were normally all-but bare. Or that not one of the viewing orbs bolted to the gantries overhead was bereft of the ambient glow that signified they were in use.
Half the noble houses in the country were likely watching the events that were about to unfold through those crystalline orbs. Though William had to wonder if the Queen was one of them or if she was present in person, simply hidden behind whatever magic she used to render herself and her guards invisible.
Still, as he gazed upon the spectacle around them, William couldn’t help but be reminded of just how impressive a construction the Floats were, the stadium sized building hosting not just the ships that made up the field, but room for spectators, viewing orbs, staff and a myriad other smaller facilities that each worked to allow the practice matches to occur.
With that in mind, one notable absence from the building’s usual occupants was hard to miss.
“Where are all the sailors and marines?” Olzenya asked.
“I don’t know,” William said as they continued walking towards Tala and her team. “Maybe they’re already onboard?”
He doubted it though. He’d have been able to see people moving about inside the great vessels or marching across the deck.
No, something was amiss here.
Still, he’d known there was a possibility of House Blackstone attempting something. And the absence of the Float’s usual staff was likely to be related.
Nothing for it now, he thought. Whatever they’ve done can’t be too overt.
The Principal of the Academy might have been in New Haven’s pocket – which made her an ally of House Blackstone – but even her power had limits with the Crown and half the country watching.
“Ma’am,” William said as he came to a stop before the Instructor from House Summerfield. “Team Seven reporting.”
Instructor Halfin, ironically the woman who’d first introduced his team to the floats glowered at him.
“I don’t like this,” she said without preamble, her voice raised loudly enough that it was clear she was aiming her words not just at him, but Tala and the rest of the world besides. “The Academy and the Floats are supposed to be a training environment for the future leadership of the nation as a whole. Not a pissing ground for idiotic adolescents.”
“I didn’t choose the venue, ma’am.” Even as she spoke, Tala’s gaze stayed on William.
“And I didn’t ask your opinion, cadet.” Halfin’s words were biting as she turned towards the third-year. “The only opinion that matters here is mine. Not yours. Not his. Not your mummy’s. And not the rest of these upjumped cretins.”
Her hand flew out to encompass the veritable circus that were the stands. “So, with that in mind you can believe me when I say that my only concern is getting through this farce as efficiently and as fairly as possible. I don’t give a shit about what’s on the line or who doesn’t want to marry who. All that matters to me is whether or not you have wax or paint on your breastplate or enough harpy-venom in your system to put you down for the count.”
Both Tala’s and William’s eyes widened a little at that.
“Wax, ma’am? Paint?” Tala said.
The older woman grunted. “You heard me, and that’s all I’ll say on the matter. Let it be known I’m not happy about it. Nor about the fact that half the sailors on base have apparently come down with the shits.”
Ah, so that was why the float’s usual crew was missing. Clearly the work of House Blackstone, though to what end William was yet unsure.
Are they trying to delay the match? He thought.
That wouldn’t be ideal for a number of reasons – most of which centred around it giving House Blackstone more time to sabotage him and his team. There’d been a damn good reason he chose to have their match literally a day after he challenged her.
“This has naturally affected my ability to run a normal Float match. Normally that would be grounds for delaying this whole farce,” Halfin continued, tone darkening as she spoke the next few words. “But it has been ‘suggested’ to me by a number of parties that doing so would be impractical. So, we shall instead be making use of one of the scenarios available to us that does not require the use of regular crewmembers.”
She gestured towards the area between the two faux ships, the football field sized stretch of land normally empty but for a few overhead nets designed to catch falling cadets.
That wasn’t the case today. Instead, the area had been filled with a tangled mess of pre-fabricated structures and various other bits of paraphernalia.
“Airship down,” the Instructor said, and after a moment’s observation, William realized that the stretch of land really did look like what you might have seen if an airship crashed into it.
Assuming said airship crashed with enough force to scatter its component parts around rather than remain as a fairly battered single object. Which, given the heights said ships could drop from, wasn’t beyond the realm of possibility.
“Our third year cadets will be familiar with this scenario, but I will explain it briefly for our first years.” Again, there was no mistaking just how unhappy Halfin was with all of this. “In short, an allied or enemy airship has crashed in neutral territory. Both sides of the conflict have dispatched a mage strike team to search the wreckage for the ship’s core so as to deny it to the enemy. Unfortunately, neither side can effectively search said wreckage until the other strike team has been completely eliminated.”
Halfin’s gaze turned towards his team. “To clarify, do not let the flavor text of this scenario fool you. There is no core within the wreckage in this scenario. The only way to win is to completely eliminate the opposing team.”
Over the woman’s shoulder, William didn’t miss the small smile that flitted across his fiancee’s features.
Ah, so that’s her game, he thought.
Oh, he didn’t doubt she would have preferred this whole engagement be delayed so as to allow her more time to stack the deck, but on short notice simply changing the scenario to this still helped her.
Theoretically.
It reduced the number of ‘wild card’ factors that might benefit him or his team. No crew members. No orbs to collect. Just a straight up fight between the two teams.
Sure, said wild cards could have just as easily worked in Tala’s favour, but given the skill disparity between the two groups, it benefited her to reduce the number of random vectors present in the coming fight.
Plus, it also had his team attempting to navigate an unfamiliar scenario.
Well played, he thought.
“Any issue with that, cadets?” Halfin said as she finished her explanation.
“None at all,” William said before the rest of his team could interrupt, noting the small pout of disappointment that flitted across Tala’s face.
She’d probably wanted him to kick up a fuss and force the match to be delayed for the reasons he’d thought of before.
Alas, she wasn’t that lucky.
No, for better or for worse this was happening here and now.
Sure, it wasn’t an ideal scenario, but he could make it work for him. It simply required him to pull out another trick that he’d been hoping to hold onto for just a little while longer.
Amusingly, Halfin also looked a little disappointed. The woman had probably wanted the match delayed on principle. It was clear both his new weapon and Tala’s interference rubbed her the wrong way.
Though as he had the thought, he was pleasantly surprised to see there was at least one woman in the academy who placed her duty as an educator and impartial judge above politics.
Indeed, if she had a reputation for such, that was likely part of the reason why she’d been selected for this match as a compromise between the Crown and the Blackstones.
“Well, if that’s all, then you’ve got ten minutes to check out your weapons and get to your starting positions.” Halfin grunted, before she seemed to remember something. “And I suppose I’ll take possession of the ‘bet’ now.”
There was no missing the disdain in the woman’s voice, which actually made William feel a bit better as he gestured over to Verity.
Unslinging the backpack she’d carried all the way over, the girl still looked more than a little awed as she unveiled the glowing metal orb. It was actually a little amusing, the mixture of relief and reluctance that crossed her features as she handed it over to the Instructor.
An instructor who was apparently not entirely carved from stone, as she somewhat reverently accepted the object.
Even the distant stands hushed down a bit as the bowling ball sized core changed hands.
Of course, it was barely a second before the moment was interrupted.
“Of course you’d have the orc carry it,” Tala grunted, her tone resigned.
Verity flinched back at the words and every other member of his team – including Olzenya leaned forward to argue – but William forestalled them all with a simple raised hand.
“Of course I did,” he said simply. “She’s a valuable member of my team and I trust her. Far more than certain other individuals present.”
A core could also be deceptively heavy despite its ability to produce lighter than air aether and he had no real desire to carry it all the way across campus. It also went unsaid that Verity was best equipped to intercept any… opportunistic thieves.
Indeed, he’d have paid to see some enterprising moron attempt to wrestle the bag holding the core off his orcish teammate on the walk over here.
It hadn’t happened of course, the possibility had always been an outlier at best, but given the stakes it had seemed better to err on the side of caution.
…It had also been amusing to see the myriad emotions that had flashed across the faces of most of the team when he quite casually tossed the bag holding the core to the orc. One would almost think he’d just thrown a baby at her.
Indeed, the only one who’d not been affected had been Marline, who’d just looked quietly resigned.
Which was still fun in its own way.
It was a little childish perhaps coming from a man ‘his age’, but that same age was what gave him the experience to know that sometimes life was about being a little silly and enjoying the small things.
And what better silly fun was there than teasing a bunch of far too serious kids by throwing around a basically indestructible ball of magical space metal?
Of course, given the flash of irritation that shot across Tala’s face, it was clear she thought his smile was an accompaniment to his taunt.
However, before she could say anything, Halfin scooped up the core. “Well, I’ll be holding onto this until the match is over. At which point I shall hand it to whomever I deem to be the victor.” For just a moment, her expression softened. “You can rest assured, both of you, that I shan’t let it out of my sight or off my person for the duration of the match. This I swear – even if I’m irritated at this whole situation.”
William and Tala both nodded, accepting the solemness of the woman’s impromptu oath.
“Alright,” she said, slinging the thing under her arm as she returned to her previous acerbic personality. “You’ve got ten minutes to collect your weapons and be at your designated spots for the beginning of the match. Anyone not in the correct place at the correct time will be considered eliminated for the purposes of this match. Dismissed.”
With her bit said, she strode away, no doubt up to the judges tower - which had an eagle’s eye view of the entire arena.
Leaving two teams of rather combative cadets behind.
Ten minutes was more than enough time to collect their gear, so William allowed himself a few seconds to simply gaze at Tala’s team.
“Finally realizing how outclassed you are, William?” Tala sneered.
It was funny, normally that kind of open disdain was beneath her. Sure, she’d yelled at him before, but to his mind that was more of an expression of frustration than animosity.
Here and now though?
She hated him.
And he revelled in it.
Not because he hated her. He didn’t. Even if they were enemies. At worst he’d say he pitied her for her ignorance and worldview.
Much like him and his otherworldly views, she was a product of her environment.
She wasn’t evil. At least not in an intentional sense. Indeed, by the standards of this world she was actually a good person.
Loyal. Dutiful. Hardworking.
Simply in service to an institution that he abhorred.
With that in mind, the reason why he relished in her disdain was simple.
It meant that he was now worthy of it in her mind. No longer an irritating non-factor that refused to play along, his actions now had consequences.
He’d earned her animosity honestly.
He was a factor. A person.
It felt good.
“Just counting the numbers,” he said. “Some part of me wondered if you might be a team member or two short.”
Indeed, the fact that he’d hoped for the murder of a young man or woman last night was something he counted amongst the least of his sins. There’d be a great many more of those to come.
Still, ignorant of his thoughts, the girl stiffened, all but confirming his suspicions as her mind no doubt turned towards last night’s explosion.
It had been her people who’d tried to raid his alchemy storage room – though it seemed she’d not been so foolish as to send anyone on her team to accomplish the job. In all likelihood the unfortunate fools who’d run afoul of his trap had likely been little more than paid off servants or some other kind of catspaw.
Irrelevant in the scheme of things ultimately and chosen for that very reason. Unfortunate, but hoping that his enemy would be a teammate or two down had ever been a long shot.
“I’ve no idea what you’re talking about,” Tala said. “My teammates are all ready and eager to serve not only me, but to honour their family names as well through that service. Though I know that’s a concept most alien to you.”
Around her, four other members of the girls team stood up a little straight, animosity burning in their gaze as they silently regarded his team with disdain.
Disdain his own team was quite happy to level back – if only out of loyalty to him.
Still, it was funny; Tala was more right than she knew. The values of this world were in many ways alien to him despite having lived here for nearly two decades.
“I suppose you’re right,” he chuckled. “To that end, I’ll see you in the arena.”
He took a moment to enjoy the look of puzzlement on his foe’s face at his placid rejoinder, before he strode away, his team falling in behind him.
Though as he walked, he made sure to turn to each of them. “Make sure to double check all of our equipment. If Tala was able to give half the Float staff food poisoning last night, I wouldn’t put it past her to be able to tamper with our equipment.”
Each of the girls nodded seriously at his words, no doubt leery of discovering a razor blade or some other such implement in one of their boots. Or that their bolt-bow had a faulty intake valve.
Indeed, the only piece of equipment William could theoretically have been sure of was that which he was currently wearing and the spell-bolts that would have been delivered clandestinely at the last minute by either Griffith or a palace guard.
And even then, what the fuck is this about wax and paint rather than rubber? He thought.
Previous / First / Next
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So I've been friends with - lets call him Steve - for over 10 years. We've hung out loads of times, talked about many things, a good friendship.
Backstory before getting into the real issue: He cheated on his girlfriend, whom he was living with, so she left him and moved out abruptly. He couldn't afford the rent on his own, and I was looking for a new apartment, so I thought it would be win/win if I moved in, so I did. He said that rent was 750$ all included per person, and it sounded reasonable to me, especially with the current housing crisis in Canada. (Hi fellow Canadians!)
Fast forward, we get papers explaining the rent increase, and he doesn't understand them so he shows them to me. I notice that our increased rent would be a total of 985$. Which made me go "Huh?" because, reminder, I pay 750$. He said "Oh don't mind that" but spoiler alert - I did mind that.
Days later, I asked him what everything (rent, wifi, electricity, etc.) costs so I could make myself a budget. He said "No worries, I already told you it's 750$/person everything included" and I played innocent and said "Yeah but I really need each cost separately so I can plan out my budget efficiently" - so he disclosed the costs.
And so I discovered that if I paid half of everything, it would cost me 690$ all-included. For those like me who suck at math, that means I pay 750$ to cover all costs while he only pays 630$.
I confronted him and he said that he never said I would pay half of everything - he made me a "friend deal" of 750$ all included. He said that if we weren't friends, it would cost me 800$ and I wouldn't have access to the living room.
I told him that I agreed to pay 750$ because he said it was per person, insinuating that he, the other person, was paying the same. I said that I would therefore pay the real price - 690$ - from now moving forward. He said that it's impossible and that I'm a horrible friend for going back on my word.
He tried calling my best friend so she would convince me that what he's doing is totally fair. She's my best friend, so she was already aware of the whole situation, but she played dumb just to see what he would say his version of events is.
She asked him what everything costs - he lied and added 5-10$ to every charge to make it seem like not as much of a discrepancy and possibly a slight miscalculation.
She badgered him to know what I get extra for paying extra - to which he had no answer, and finally confessed that I pay more than him because it was the only way he could make his budget work. She told him that I'm not responsible for paying part of his budget, and he was apparently flabbergasted by that.
She suggested to write out 2 contracts; one that I would pay half of everything, and that I swear to do half the chores (which he said I never do). In the other one, I would pay 750$ as agreed, but he swears to do all of the chores. Then I'd choose which one to sign. Obviously, I'd choose the first one, but I have yet to see any contract.
Then he started hiding the toilet paper. I wish I were kidding. I had to start buying toilet paper and hiding it in my room.
SO. Here's where the AITA question comes in. Our landlady has no idea that he's subleasing his rooms. Hell, I doubt she even knows that I live there. AITA for thinking about informing her about the whole situation and risking my friend getting kicked out?
For those who want more backstory, here are my current living conditions.
His girlfriend - the girl he cheated on his previous girlfriend with - is ALWAYS over here - doesn't pay a single penny - and I wouldn't mind if she had respect for me and our surroundings.
She wakes me up on weekends at 8am by blasting a Spanish podcast in the kitchen instead of listening it with headphones and/or in my roommate's room. My room is right next to the kitchen.
She eats cinnamon-flavoured toast every morning - I'm allergic to cinnamon.
I have to wash the bathtub every time I want to take a shower because she leaves clumps of long dark hair. My hair is pink, so it's obviously not mine.
I allowed access to my Netflix account, and she changed all the settings to Spanish without even asking me first.
I told her and my friend about all these issues, but they keep happening as if I never said a thing.

Hi, I was a weird ass teenager and I feel so bad for my past actions. When I was 16-18years old I would send/expose around nsfw a lot. I thought I was being funny then. I had no concept of age barriers apparently because I would be sending this stuff to people my age but also those like 3-4 years younger than me. Obviously I know better now but then I was weird as hell as a teenager. I know for a fact that there was no ill intent behind sending such things as I did genuinely think I was being funny with them and they did laugh along as well. I was in my porn=funny phase. At first I was scared if I had accidentally groomed them but luckily I know now that I didn’t thankfully. Just looking back at it all I’m just so grossed out and feel like dog shit for it. I apologized to them and they said it’s all good, no worries and that they appreciate the apology and that to just not do it again. I told my friends and they said that I’m ok and that we all do stupid stuff when we’re kids and that the fact that I feel so gross about it is a sign of me maturing. I’m just having a hard time going forward because what I did was wrong. While not grooming it was still wrong and just weird. I’m 22 now and I feel like jumping off a bridge. Please be careful on the internet please. You don’t know who’s behind the screen and what they’re thinking. Don’t be like 16-18 me and not think things through. If I need to flair this please let me know

Previous Part
“I knew it, I knew he’d pull something like that!”
Was the only thought running through my head as I watched Keith get forced into the truck outside. I was scared for Keith and I was angry, that kind of anger you feel in the pit of your stomach. Not at Keith though, my fury was directed at myself for freezing again. I just sat in the window and watched him get taken. Headache or not I should’ve done something, anything! Instead I just sat there and watched, powerless as always. My first instinct was to go running back home, maybe Frank and Stein could help somehow. Imagine my surprise when I walked in the door and they were looking for me. Well maybe I wasn’t to surprised, I hadn’t told them I didn’t plan on coming back home when I left yesterday.
“Bianca! We were just going to come looking for you, Keith had this idea and… are you alright?”
Frank asked, concern covering his face like a shadow. I must’ve looked like a mess, and the hot wet feeling on my face told me I’d started crying at some point on my way over as well.
“Are you ok? Did something happen?”
Frank repeated in his best fatherly voice. I could barley stammer out the words.
“Keith… gone… they took him.”
My babbling was enough though, realization shown on both their faces. Stein said something to Frank that I couldn’t hear then they nodded to each other.
“He was almost spot on with the timing. Well we best start getting around to do our part then.”
Stein said in his usual uncaring and mildly haughty manner. I don’t know why but it really boiled my blood this time. Keith was gone and he’s just moving on with things?
“Does no-one care about what just happened?! We agreed to look out for him and what did we do? Nothing!”
I screamed at no-one in particular. Those two just gave me a look like I was a misbehaving child.
“We’ve done what we could Bianca, besides Keith is the one who suggested what we’re about to do next.”
Frank stated, in an even and calm tone that made me stop and realize how ridiculous I was acting. Freaking out wouldn’t get us anywhere, even though I really wanted to. So I took a deep breath and stepped back for a second to collect myself.I hated to admit it but in a way their cold, calculating, order of operations approach would probably help here. Those two would never crack under pressure like me. While they didn’t talk about it, I’m sure they’d seen far worse working with the government.
Stein was rushing around looking for car keys when I came back into the kitchen. Frank however, stopped what he was doing to come over to me. I held up my hand to stop him when he opened his mouth to say something.
“No, you don’t have to try and convince me, I’ll come with you. What was Keith’s plan anyways? What did he put you guys up to?”
I asked, much calmer than before but still a little on edge. I couldn’t help but to feel at least a little responsible for what happened to Keith. I know it wasn’t my fault but I came with him for a reason. As much fun as last night had been I wasn’t taking it seriously. I should’ve stayed up to watch for Shaoni, maybe looked around for something she left when she was there before. Regardless, I had to be better next time.
“Keith thought that maybe someone from the reservation a little while outside town may have heard legends about Shaoni. She’s the Thunderbird, that’s an important figure in their stories and legends. Being so close to where she had been sleeping for years he thought there might be a connection. So he asked us to go out and ask around.”
Stein answered me before Frank had a chance to, walking into the room and tossing a jacket my way.
“And put this on, its cold out there.”
It was actually funny how often Stein tried to care and actually came off as so much colder. Almost like he was doing it because he had to, not because he actually cared about me.
“Don’t mind him, he’s just stressed with everything going on lately.”
Frank explained, trying to comfort me. He was right of course, but it didn’t change the fact that it still rubbed me the wrong way.
Ten minutes later I was in the car headed out toward the reservation. It wasn’t a very eventful ride and the pine trees didn’t make for great scenery, I’d seen it all before anyways. Frank and Stein were quiet the whole time and we couldn’t find Rocco before we left. Part of me wondered where he was and part of me didn’t want to know. This gave my mind time to wander and I found myself thinking my life before meeting Frank and Stein. It was weird, I usually tried not to think about it at all but something had brought those memories roaring back. Probably due to Keith asking about it the other day. No-one ever seemed to care about that, my past that is. Every now and then I’d get bored and wander around town. Someone might come up to me and talk but not like Keith did. The only real questions they asked were usually something along the lines of “What’re you doing tonight?” And other variations of that. They were usually looking for something I had no interest in. Sometimes it wasn’t entirely their choice to talk to me. I’d just use my powers simply to have a conversation with someone. Keith actually cared about me though, at least I think so.
A loud honk broke me out of my trance, we had arrived on the reservation. The improvised trailer park we’d arrived in wasn’t much to look at. A dog or two ran around the cluttered ground, free from any sort of leash. An older car missing most of the front end sat raised on a few blocks of concrete. The trailers themselves were run down and rusted. Despite the sorry sight of the place three men sat around a fire, laughing and generally having a great time. The trio looked up as we walked over, recognition passing over their faces. We must’ve looked out of place here in our shiny SUV and Frank and Stein’s three piece suits. Those two were always overdressed when they went out. The only place they fit in was the lab and they seemed more than fine with that.
“Stein! Is that you?”
Exclaimed the man on the left, standing to meet us. He looked happy to see Stein, though I had never seen the guy before in my life. Which meant he must’ve been a friend from before I knew Stein.
“My friend! How have you been? Have you had any difficulties with your… condition.”
Stein replied, cutting his eyes at the other two men like he didn’t trust them.
“They know old friend, no need to beat around the bush here.”
He had to have some supernatural abilities, that’s the only way Stein knew anyone. The question was, what was he?
The man’s name was Sam, Frank told me as we joined the men at the fire. I asked him for more, like what he meant by condition but he wouldn’t budge. Condition usually meant supernatural but a lot of them just looked like normal people. I’m sure everyone has some picture of a succubus in their head and I’m… not that. So I couldn’t even begin to guess at what Sam’s “condition” was.
“So what brings you out here Stein? I hate to say it, but I never expected to see you again.”
Sam said, trying to be as friendly as possible while ultimately telling Stein he didn’t really want him here. He didn’t feel nervous, that much I sensed for sure. No, it was fear that drove him to try and push Stein away, but what did he have to be afraid of?
“I assure you I’ll be gone before I overstay my welcome. I just have a few questions I’d like answers to. It’s entirely possible that you know nothing as well, in which case I’ll be gone even sooner. But you wouldn’t lie to me just to see me gone, now would you?”
Stein almost threatened, some of the friendliness slipping out of his voice. There was more going on here than what I could see or even sense. I’ve got a really good sense of what people are feeling at any given time but the context of those feelings can get lost on me. Sam was feeling fear, way too much fear for the situation. Maybe he knew what Stein was going to ask but I couldn’t tell for sure. I looked to the two scientists, cutting my eyes from Frank to Stein trying to see if they wanted me to step in and calm them down.
“Stein… I can’t… if she knew I talked to you she’d come here. The things I’ve done… what you helped me stop doing. She wouldn’t see it that way if she came here… she would…”
Sam blubbered out, completely losing his composure before Stein raised a hand and cut him off.
“She? You mean Shaoni, we’re aware of what’s going on. We still do have some questions about her though, ones I hope you have answers to.”
At the mention of her name all three men shot up, so I stepped forward. Frank protested but he was to slow to stop me. It’s difficult to describe how I can make people do what I want, these days I just kind of will it to happen and it does. I can force an emotion, or a feeling onto someone else by imagining it myself and projecting it onto them. Frank and Stein think it has something to do with pheromones my body produces. These pheromones can induce certain emotions or feelings if I want them too. In this case I wanted these men to feel tired, cooperative, compliant, and that’s just what they became. Just as soon as they tried to stand they buckled to their knees. I was pushing a little to hard so I eased up a bit, I didn’t want to just put them to sleep or something. Sam got back to his feet and sat down in his chair as the others did the same.
“I’d like to know about Shaoni, The full story, as much as you know.”
I commanded more than asked Sam as he just nodded towards me, a vacant look in his eyes.
“Where should I start exactly little lady?”
Sam asked me, his tone a mix of nervous and compliant.
“I want to know what you know about her, all of it, then we’ll go.”
I answered, trying to ignore the looks Frank and Stein were giving me. They knew I was taking a risk, he didn’t want to share what he knew so I was forcing it out of him. He wanted to tell me now but it wasn’t really “him”. I was in his head, and while he wasn’t going to fight me on anything now, I was sure a part of him was screaming deep down. Fighting desperately to keep his mouth shut to avoid the consequences of telling me anything. I tried not to think about what I was doing to him as Sam began his story.
“Well to start her name wasn’t always Shaoni, It’s hard to keep one name when you’ve lived as long as her. Her name meant “Stormcaller” as near as it translates to your language. She was an elder in a long forgotten tribe in what you know as Canada today. She was renowned for her ability to over see trials and solve debates among her people, always able to set right apart from wrong. The exact name and place of her tribe have been lost to the ages but I do know that it was wiped out. As the story goes the tribe met its end at the hands of “explorers”, all save for Stormcaller were killed. She fled far into the forests and eventually stumbled upon four spirits, the original Thunderbirds. At this time they were still great spirits, created by Nanabozho. Those spirits took pity on Stormcaller, allowing her to live with them in the four corners of the world. With them she learned many things, how to fight, how to think as only a spirit can, and most of all she sharpened her already formidable sense of justice. That need to see justice done, and the proper sense to see what was right from what was wrong is what lead the chief of the Thunderbird spirits to bind itself to her, giving her the powers she’s said to have today, letting her exist as spirit and man made one.
The other Thunderbird spirits eventually followed this example, choosing representatives of their own, each representing an Ideal: Courage, so that our people would never falter in the face of adversity. Solidarity, so that, divided as they may be at times our people were one at heart. Duty, so that our people would never forget their place in the world and the customs and traditions we upheld. Finally there was Justice to lead them all, so that no wrong would be left to stand, and so that one among the ideals would keep the rest in check. These four formed a council that watched over our people for many years.
As imperialism grew in the world and more crimes were committed against their people this council became more and more warlike. Often Stormcaller, now simply known as Justice spearheaded these actions. She sought to right the wrongs committed against her people and hold all responsible accountable for their actions. In accordance with her duties as the embodiment of justice for our people. This war of hers would prove to be her downfall, every day her sense of justice became more absolute, more black and white. She stopped consulting the council to help guide her decisions, believing she and she alone knew what was best for her people and fellow ideals. One thing that changed when the Thunderbird spirits bound themselves was their immutability. As a spirt nothing could harm them, they were eternal, they were and always would be. But once they had become one with a man they could be ended, They would live forever but man’s mortality meant they could be killed unlike before. Something Justice would learn for herself in time.
As her warlike nature grew, Justice began to involve the ideals in open conflict with those who sought to take their peoples land and desecrate their way of life. Eventually Solidarity fell in battle, and those who saw him fall learned of the greater forces at play. These people sought to learn the truth of the power the had seen from Solidarity and doubled their intrusions into sacred land, searching for answers. Suddenly the hunters had become the hunted, perhaps if Justice had not clung so tightly to her convictions everything would’ve ended differently. Instead Justice doubled down on her pursuit to right every wrong she could lay her eyes upon, spurred on by the death of Solidarity. Eventually Courage fell and so to did Duty, only hardening Justice’s resolve. It was only when she revealed herself to her people one day and they fled from her, afraid of what she would do. Afraid that they to had committed some wrong that she sought to right in her own violent way. This reception forced Justice to realize what she had allowed herself to become. Justice had become Vengeance, lost in anger for wrongs she could never hope to right she had lost herself, becoming something else entirely.
She shed her name, her duties, her people and disappeared into the world. Watching what would come for her people broke her. She had lost what she sought to guide and guard, let the people the Thunderbird spirits sought to protect so long ago fall to ruin. Her need to see justice done never left her, but what was once a raging inferno became nothing more than a spark. If she came across one that had escaped justice, hidden their tracks or found a way out she would know. She would right the smaller wrongs of the world in her own way, stoking what remained of the flame within and finding her own purpose in the world. Eventually she would take on a new name, Shaoni, why I do not know but it is what she choose. Her sense of justice was still absolute, she saw no shades of grey just right and wrong. But the scale of her judgment was reduced, no longer would she try and right every wrong the world had to offer but only those she could reach. The world is a dark place though, and sometimes a lesser evil can ease pain. Shaoni didn’t see lesser evil as something she could abide and so her judgements often left more pain in their place. She grew weary of her pursuit once again, seeing how little she had changed and how much pain she had brought. She chose to settle down and remove herself from the world. Shaoni would never be able to die, not from the passing of time. She could remove herself from the equation in a cave not to far from where we stand now.”
Sam’s story hurt to listen too, in some ways it only seemed like Shaoni did what she thought was right. Yet time and time again she failed to see shades of grey, and that cost her everything. It made me think of who I was years ago in a way, not that I was some all powerful spirit thing like her but still. What would Shaoni think of the person I was? How would she judge me for my actions before I meet Frank and Stein? I certainly wasn’t a saint, but did that mean I couldn’t be better? I shook my head, now wasn’t the time to think of things like that. I stopped forcing Sam to answer my question, leaving him to his own devices. There was always some lingering effects after I… did my thing. I’m not sure how exactly it felt for them but I don’t imagine it was pleasant. Realizing you weren’t really in control of yourself has a way of causing issues for a person. Sam seemed to be shaking it off pretty well though, I’d seen worse things happen after I’d finished with someone, like Keith losing hours of time sitting in the kitchen. Playing with emotions can cause stress in the brain, especially since I’m forcing an emotion or feeling on them. More than once I’d seen someone left with uncontrollable swings in mood or a complete lack of emotion or feeling of any sort because of me. I hopped that wasn’t going to happen again here.
“Bianca what was that!”
Frank complained, finally breaking free of the spell the situation had cast over him. He ran over to the other two men that hadn’t gotten up from their chairs like Sam. Worry crashed over me like a wave as I realized why Frank sounded so concerned. One of the men was seizing on the ground, his body shaking violently as spasms coursed through him, had I done that? Sam was in a blissfully ignorant sate, he just sat in his chair watching the fire, unaware of what was happening to his friend. Frank and Stein leapt into action, holding the seizing man on the ground. Stein pulled off his belt and placed it in the mans mouth, trying to keep him from biting himself. My eyes were fixed on the third man who lay motionless on the ground. I took small steady steps toward him, hoping against hope that I could find a pulse. As I got closer I realized his chest was rising and falling. He was alive but who knew what he was going through right now. I felt distant, Frank was yelling something at me but I didn’t catch a word. I had to do it right? I had to make them tell us what they knew, it could help Keith right?
“What did you do to them?”
Sam asked me, apparently free of the aftereffects of my influence. I snapped my head to the side and watched him take a threatening step towards me. I backed away, afraid he might do something rash. I shouldn’t have done that, Stein could’ve convinced them on his own.
“What did you do to them? What’s wrong with them?”
Sam asked again, his voice growing more desperate. Stein picked that moment to appear at my side.
“Sam they’ll be ok just give them a minute. She didn’t mean to hurt you or your friends, just let it go. I’m helping her the same way I helped you, she’s not always in control.”
Sam softened a little bit at that but he was still wary of me. What Stein said was a lie, I had control of my abilities most of the time these days but Sam didn’t know that. Frank walked over to where we were standing with a relieved look on his face.
“They’ll be alright, they just need rest. What about you, are you feeling alright Sam?”
Frank asked, nodding towards him. Sam didn’t answer but it was plain to see he was doing far better than his friends.
“I’d like you all to leave.”
Sam ordered, putting his metaphorical foot down. Whatever favor he owed Stein didn’t matter anymore, he wanted us out. People were beginning to come out of some of the other trailers, gawking at the scene in front of them. As the three of us were leaving Sam said one more thing,
“Stein, this makes us even.”
He growled in an even but angry tone. You could just tell he was staring daggers at us the whole way back to the SUV. I turned back for a moment and I could’ve sworn his skin was wriggling and changing. Like he was just barley holding back something. What concerned me even more was what he felt, not anger or worry, but fear.
The ride back was less than pleasant. You know that feeling when you’ve done something wrong but no one really wants to address it yet? Yeah, that’s what was going on here, the air was practically electric.
“We needed him to talk…”
Stein cut me off immediately, shouting,
“Sometimes you don’t need to help! Look… I know you meant well but you can hurt people with that power of yours. I’ve never seen it that bad before but then again you’ve never done it to a group of people that long. Who knows what longterm consequences it might have. Just… be more careful in the future.”
Stein wasn’t as angry as he tried to appear, part off him was even relived, maybe because I had been the one to handle the situation instead of him.
“I know, I know its just… Keith is stuck out there at that mine with her, I couldn’t leave with nothing.”
I agreed, He was right, it was a risk but how could I have just let it be? No-one else was going to look out for him so that fell on us now. As much as I hated having to force things out of people I was good at it, really good. Despite how I felt about what I could do to people that was the easiest way to get Sam to speak back there.
“Where did this whole drive to help Keith come from anyways? A few days ago you talk him into watching the house and throw some money, our money, at him for the trouble. I’ve seen you do that a few times before with others so you could come with us when we went to stock up on things. Regardless of our misgivings surrounding your methods. So it didn’t go that well this time and he found out about you and us. Something like that was bound to happen eventually. What I can’t picture is why you go out of your way to help him. I don’t personally have any issue with you jumping to his defense. Its not too hard to understand why someone would, considering his situation. But for you, well it seems out of character for you.”
Frank chimed in with a question of his own. I’m sure he didn’t mean anything by it hurt to see him so surprised that I’d consider helping another person.
I never answered Frank’s question, I thought about it a lot the rest of the way back though. Why was I so intent on helping Keith? All my life I’d done things just to survive, even when I was really young I had to find a way to get by on my own. Sure I had my mother but she had her hands full with her own life. She didn’t have much after my father left and did everything she could to make ends meet. I just tried to stay out of her way and help where I could. I never complained when she forgot to make dinner, or when there just wasn’t food around the house. I’d just go without or take what I needed from someone else. Even back then I knew it was wrong but I always had looks on my side. Combine that with pity and not a lot of people would say no to the cute hungry kid. After Brooke, I only had myself and I just kept doing what I needed to. This was different though, I didn’t have to help Keith but I wanted to help him all the same. I didn’t get around town much and I always felt like I just existed around Frank and Stein. With Keith I wasn’t just this thing lying around the house, I was a person, a friend even. That was it, the first time it really clicked for me, Keith was my friend, not because I had wanted him to be or because I made him think he was. No, he was actually there for me and it was all his choice. I didn’t have to puppet him around myself, he actually wanted to be there. I didn’t have to wonder if it was just me and everything I could do pulling him in. For the first time in years someone had actually cared enough to ask about me, Frank and Stein never really did because they knew how much it hurt. Keith didn’t know how much it hurt to talk about but still. I needed to actually talk about all that happened to me with someone who listened for real.
Coming to that realization only made me want to do something stupid. Like run up to that mine and try to get Keith out of there myself. But that’s exactly what it was, stupid. If we wanted to get Keith back we’d need something better than just me. We’d need a real plan, one I’d just started thinking of. There was something else eating at me to. Keith had offered to take some burden from Shaoni back in Imalone, I had an idea what it might be and it scared me. If I was right well, Keith was in more danger than we all thought.
When we pulled back into the driveway Tuck was waiting at the door.
“Where’ve Y’all been?! I been lookin’ for ya damn near all afternoon! Somein’ happened o’re at Keith’s place, He’s gone. I cain’t find that “lab assistant” of yours neither.”
Tuck said hurriedly, his southern accent that he usually tried to hide seeping out into his words.
“We know, it was those trials he told us about. I presume he told you as well then?”
Stein informed him as he got out of the car and marched towards the door, barely making eye contact. Stein had an idea, I could read it all over him. He got this way when he was away from home and wanted too test something, once he was back there was no standing between him and his lab.
“Yeah, the kid told me something like that. Would explain where all those people were goin’ to. Couple of the regulars in town, ones I know look up to that damn bird, left this morning headin’ towards the old mines.”
Tuck spoke to no one in particular, nodding to himself as if to check off the fact that Keith disappearing and people leaving town were two related things.
“Why don’t you come in then, you might be able to help out with the situation. We just learned a few things about this… “damn bird” of yours. I really would’ve appreciated if you told us about that years ago. Perhaps you’d like to tell us what you know of the Thunderbird in the lab?”
Stein ordered rather than asked, pointing to the door for no more than a moment before continuing on his march to the basement. Frank and I filed in after them but I didn’t join them in the lab.
I looked around the house for Rocco but couldn’t find a trace. It wasn’t like him not to leave some trail of destruction in his wake. Well hidden or not, we usually found evidence of whatever he was up to but this time there was nothing. I had no clue where he’d gotten off to, maybe I was better off not knowing. After I gave up I joined the others in the basement, to their surprise I actually had decided to make an appearance. Frank and Stein were a little rattled at first but soon went back to their work. Tuck just beamed at me proudly, like he knew something I didn’t. We set about comparing notes on Shaoni, and separating fact from fiction based on Frank and Stein’s many years working with the supernatural. It was… nice, in a family bonding kind of way. Keith had brought us all together, gave these scientist a new problem to solve. Gave Tuck a chance for some kind of justice for the friends he’d lost in the mine collapse all those years ago. For me, he’d brought me together with the family I’d fallen in with. Strange as they were, this was my family, or at least the closest thing I had to it. I had to help, not just for Keith but for them. I’d been a burden, scared to go outside, hateful of what I could do despite using it to make life easier for myself. Worst of all I’d been stuck in my own head, I’d gone through awful things, done awful things, used my body and my charm to get through life. I’d been every bit as evil as Brooke had been to me. I did everything he’d done to me to others, only it was so much easier for me to do it. I hate myself for it, maybe I always would, but I couldn’t let that stop me now. I had to set all that aside and be there for the people in my life, I had to be a person again, not just hope everyone would treat me like one.

noticed this post in the Alevel subreddit, so lets make an olevels version of it!
a few hilarious things from the alevel post:
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• So today in my bio paper the girl in front of me decided mid exam to give herself a fish tail braid rather odd when everyone else is writing like their life depend on it (u/stockleyacademia)

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• I've seen someone fall asleep within the first 5 minutes of an exam starting. (u/CSApplicant101)

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• During my o levels this one kid could not keep his laughter in and he kept giggling under his breath. The invigilator asked him what was so funny and that is when his laughter exploded, the whole class started laughing including the invigilator. It was a small room. (u/sufferinfromsuccess1)

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• There was a girl crying during maths and she peed herself 😭 (u/holiestkiss)**

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• Some girl got up onto her desk and ripped up her paper - it was math (u/StfuJohnny)

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• A girl who was taking arabic sitting next to me. every time i’d glance at her she would be reading the passages in the paper like it was an actual book. Never saw her write a thing in the 2 hrs we were in there. walked out without an inch of anxiety on her face. queen behavior. (u/Drilling-Pickle)

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• At the end of the math exam this year, there was this dude next to me (retaking the exam) who was going through his paper and loudly whispering “Yes! YES” while happily smiling and waving his hands around. (u/NoAverageMe)

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• Saw a guy take a nap during a history exam. Woke up with a confused look, saw everyone else writing furiously, then grabbed his pen and started scribbling furiously about... the French Revolution as a fashion show (u/Kellywatson7886)

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• During a GCSE geography practise exam and we were in our classroom that had a floor that when you walked over it, it made a loud noise. The teacher who wears high heels walked through the class room and her shoes made such a noise that everyone stopped and watched what she was doing. When she left the room, someone at the back of the classroom said ‘And that’s how earthquakes are made’. Everyone laughed at that, it took a minute if so for everyone to calm down and get back to their papers (u/RainbowRevolver)

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• During Chem GCSE, kid two seats behind me on the right just starts barking, then begins meowing. He’s obviously playing around with his mates given by how he’d turned his chair around to face them. Invigilators did nothing. (u/idonotexist20)

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• During an AS exam when an examiner left the room some guy (external candidate) pulled out a can of beer took a huge gulp, then reached back to his bag and retrieved a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He lit it, took a puff then put it out and threw it back in his bag. We never found out who the guy was, but I still think he’s a legend. (u/Plus-Deal-1669)

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and thats all i had time for!!
personally the most exciting thing in my exams (first time, O2) was literally ''Welcome on behalf of the British Council. I am your exam supervisor. You are now subject to exam conditions and may not communicate with, give help to, or ask for help by other candidates. There are 2 exams going on in the hall today...'' I LOOKED FORWARD TO IT CAUSE IT WAS THE ONLY THING THAT BORING. oh well.
any funny experience you all had? (cmon we're MUCH more funnier than those depressed alevel kids -_-)
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‎ ‎ PS : the huge gaps in bw are so that its easier to read -- personally i couldnt understand a thing even with the bullets, so yeah!

General Information

• Release date: May 23, 2024
• No. of players: Single System (1)
• Genre: Role-Playing, Adventure
• Publisher: Nintendo
• ESRB rating: Everyone
• Supported play modes: TV mode, Tabletop mode, Handheld mode
• Game file size: 5.1 GB
• Supported languages: Dutch, English, French, German, Italian, Japanese, Korean, Simplified Chinese, Spanish, Traditional Chinese

Overview (from Nintendo eShop Page)

Join Mario and friends on an epic paper adventure
A classic story unfolds on the Nintendo Switch system.
Collect the Crystal Stars before the bad guys do
The X-Nauts are after the treasure behind the Thousand-Year Door! With a map from Princess Peach—and the help of a few locals—Mario must journey through a colorful world made of paper to find it first.
The stars of the show
Surprises abound in this deep and engaging tale, where everyone’s got something to say and it’s often not what you’d expect! Here are just a few of the colorful characters you’ll encounter along the way.

• Mario: (A man of few words, Mario rarely speaks and prefers to let his hammer do the talking.)
• Peach: “I cannot believe this! You X-Jerks kidnapped me before I could even begin to enjoy my vacation!”
• Bowser: “Princess Peach and the legendary treasure will be MINE!”
• Goombella: “My name's Goombella. I'm a junior at the University of Goom. Nice to meet ya!”
• Koops: “My tummy's getting upset... Let's find the guy in charge before I lose my nerve!”
• Madame Flurrie: “I shall ever love the stage! I must feel the spotlight shine on me again! I MUST!”
• Yoshi: “I can hold my own! I'll swallow any opponent whole, honest! Just leave it to me!”
• Three Shadows (Beldam, Marilyn, and Vivian): “Mmmmwee hee hee hee! Time to go to work, lovelies!”
• Lord Crump: “OK, you pests! One pummeling, coming up...with extra fists!”
• Grodus: “All will kneel before the X-Naut regime! And then I, Grodus, will build a new world!”

Know when to fold ‘em
Master your badges and timing-based attacks to impress the audience in a theatrical twist on turn-based RPG combat. Make use of all the abilities that come with being cursed—er, conveniently made of paper—like folding into a plane to cross big gaps or turning sideways to slip through narrow openings.

• Badges: Earn and equip badges to customize your stats and abilities.
• Special Moves: Collect Crystal Stars to unlock powerful moves.
• “Cursed” Abilities: Find a Black Key to unlock a chest and get “cursed” with abilities that turn Mario into a plane, a tube, a boat, and more!

Leaf through a storybook world
Explore a colorful paper world with charming characters in every fold.
A classic turns the page
Twenty years after the original game on the Nintendo GameCube™ system, this version for the Nintendo Switch™ system has revamped graphics, an updated soundtrack, and gameplay additions like updated quick-travel pipes and a Partner Ring to swap characters in a jiffy.

Reviews

Aggregators

• Metacritic - 90
• OpenCritic - 90

Articles

• COGconnected - 90 / 100
• Checkpoint Gaming - 9.5 / 10
• ComicBook.com - 4.5 / 5
• Console Creatures - Recommended
• Daily Mirror - 4 / 5
• Digitec Magazine - German - 4 / 5
• Enternity.gr - Greek - 10 / 10
• Game Informer - 8.3 / 10
• Glitched Africa - 9 / 10
• God is a Geek - 10 / 10
• IGN - 9 / 10
• Nintendo Life - 9 / 10
• Press Start - 9.5 / 10
• SECTOR.sk - Slovak - 8.5 / 10
• Saudi Gamer - Arabic - 9 / 10
• Spaziogames - Italian - 8.2 / 10
• Stevivor - 9 / 10
• TheSixthAxis - 9 / 10
• VGC - 5 / 5
• Video Chums - 9 / 10

^{This list was last updated via exported from OpenCritic at 9:57 AM ET}
Cheers,
The /NintendoSwitch mod team

Help a girl out with crush triangle
I (25 F) have had a crush on a coworker (29 M) for almost three years now. I am very reserved / shy and he is also reserved. We have interacted very little but I just can’t get his stares or voice out of my head. I thought he also had a crush on me but was maybe afraid to approach. A few months ago, I started to befriend another coworker (29 M), let’s call him E, and so far has been pretty casual. One day I find out they are friends. On that same day, there was a work breakfast and one of my workers took me around to greet everyone because “I need to get out of my shell”. I was talking to a work acquaintance (male) and my crush stared at me the entire time. Then it came my turn to greet my crush and I could barely look at him. I was joking that I wanted to run away from the greet tour and he leaned in and whispered about staying in his corner. A bit later I’m sitting at a table by myself and my crush is standing with view to the table and is chatting with other coworkers and E. I was looking at my phone and when I looked up, my crush was looking at me again. He looked away when I saw him. I felt a little happy and tried to muster the courage to get up and talk to them, and as I’m making my way, he walks away. Later during the event, I’m chatting with my new friend E and my crush is staring at me the entire time while talking to his other friend W. Fast forward a few months and E starts throwing hints that my crush, E, and W have been talking about me and are all curious about my age. I again assumed that maybe my crush liked me and E was being a wingman. Then a few days later E starts throwing hints that he has a crush on me. Yesterday he told me that he was talking to my crush and my crush told him to invite me to Es birthday dinner that they all go to or to ask for my number or he is going to regret it because another guy will eventually try to get with me. After telling me that, he hinted that he was afraid to ask me for my phone number for fear of it being weird, I said it wasn’t weird and since we were friends and handed him my phone. I don’t want to lead E on but I don’t know how to make it clear that I have a crush on his friend. Did I mess up by giving him my phone number? I do genuinely want to be his friend. Is there any chance that my crush likes me? Should I avoid the situation entirely? Im stuck.
A little background about the players Crush: it’s been a while since he has been in a relationship and he feels lonely (E has told me this). Has only had one girlfriend. He doesn’t seem like a very confident person and I assume being a shorter guy (approximately 5’3”) probably plays into that as well. E: also been a while since he’s been in a relationship. Not sure about the rest of his dating history. His recent relationship did not end well (I didn’t ask why as I don’t want to be intrusive since we just started becoming friends). I never asked him for any information on my crush or himself but he just volunteers it. Me: im always complimented on my looks or how kind I am. Been told I have a girl next door vibe. I’m not very confident so I struggle to interact with people and overthink everything. I’ve never been in a relationship or even kissed anyone and so some of the nicknames I have acquired over time with friends are “extra virgin olive oil” or “nun”. Which I think are pretty funny.

Our kids became friends last fall as they played hockey together. The other parent was the coach. Early on in the season the coach mentioned that my son was playing with a stick that was too short for him. He then overheard my wife telling our son that she wasn't sure we had the money to buy a new stick right now. He talked to his son and they gave our son one of his old sticks that was a better size for our son. This made my wife think highly of these people and she started kinda pushing the friendship between the families especially between the two boys who play hockey together.
We start inviting this kid to our house and my wife warns me that he is very autistic and doesn't have play dates a lot. The kid isn't even at our house thirty minutes and has already punched our six year old. The kid was 10 at the time. We have three boys. At the time they were nine, eight, and six. So he punches our six year old and then he just starts being awful to the two younger boys. Because I am an adult, I don't freak out. I talk to him. I tell him if he wants to spend time at our house he isn't allowed to hit or a be mean to the younger kids. I tell him that I don't get the impression that he is a mean person, but rather he seems to think it will impress my son if he is mean to his younger brothers and that being mean to younger siblings is not cool and won't impress anyone. It will just make the parents think twice about letting him come over. After our talk he started behaving a bit better, but was still mean at times during this first visit.
The boys start hanging out together all the time and while my younger two boys loved this kid, my oldest who he was really there to hang out with started to act distant and at times seemed to be pushing his friend away. His friend would freak out if my son didn't want to do exactly what he wanted to do which was usually video games. Sometimes my son would tire of video games and start doing something else without his friend. His friend would go find him and lecture him on how when he has a friend over he needs to play with them. I would normally agree that it was rude of my son to just leave his friend and go do something else, but tried to also explain to his friend that he was tired of video games and maybe they could find something else to do together, but this kid pretty much only wanted to play video games and would be almost offended that my son didn't.
Anyway after I noticed this happening, the other parents started informing my wife that our son was bullying their son. My wife does most of communicating with other parents as I am more introverted normally and too often assume other adults are assholes. The only thing we noticed for sure was our son yelling at this kid once while fishing and we both talked to our son about how we should talk to friends and yelling at friends would lead to him not having any. Everything else was hearsay and I didn't know what to believe, but we still talked to our son about the accusations of bullying and we are not okay with bullying and we better not find out he is doing that. They accused our son of sending mean messages, but provided no proof and we looked everywhere we could think of and the messages we see our sending are to his paternal father and grandmother. Still we talk to him again about what he is being accused off and let him know that we really hope he isn't bullying anyone, and he will be in big trouble if we find out he is.
While this is going on I am downstairs one day and hear the kids playing games online. They are playing with this friend and I can hear his voice through the TV speaker. He is yelling at them telling them to talk to him. " I know you have a mic! Turn in it on! This is very rude! I know you have a mic so talk to me or I am leaving! I don't know why you guys are being buttholes to me. Just turn the mic on and talk to me or I am not playing with you! Their mic had stopped working and he was assuming they were just ignoring him, which doesn't make any sense because they sent him the invite to play with them, but he's a kid so I can't fault him for assumptions.
Fast forward to Saturday. This kid has a birthday party and my whole family is there. My kid was on one that day I admit. He was trying to impress a girl and kept teasing me by taking my hat and running off with it in a playful manner. This is something he may get from his mom and I because the way we play and flirt with eachother is by little things like this. She'll come home with silly string now and then and spray me randomly, and I find it funny and love that part of her personality, even when I am in a grumpy mood, I always smile about it. He has seen his mom shove frosting in my face at birthday parties, and so he thinks this is funny. The part that upsets me the most is that apparently the kids mother told the kids specifically not to play with the cupcakes. She said not to take one if you weren't going to eat it I guess. My son took a cupcake and then playfully tried to throw it at the birthday boy. I say playfully because that was what it was. There was no mean intent but the birthday boy got upset and I talked to my son about not doing that kind of thing unless you know the other person is okay with that kind play. Some people just aren't. Anyway my wife asks if everything is okay, because the other family seems upset. They say everything is fine and laugh it off. An hour later the dad sends my wife a bunch of messages calling our son a bully and us bad parents for allowing all of this bullying to continue and then blocks us on everything.
Over the course of the hockey season this dude got more and more involved with local kids hockey and is now one of the main dudes in kids hockey locally. I already know how he handles things cause there were multiple hockey teams and it was getting to be too much for him, so he hand chose the kids he wanted to coach the most and made one team that he would coach and basically canceled the rest of the season for the other kids. He didn't tell the parents of the kids he didn't choose for his team. He just said because ice time was hard to come by, scheduling conflicts, the incompetence of others involved in local hockey, and not having enough help, the season would be ending a bit early this year. The other parents found out about the secret team and were pissed. Then he basically just called them all assholes in mass text and blocked them all. Worried this douche is gonna have a say in what hockey team my son is on next season he'll screw him over.
Am I the asshole for not beating my son senseless over a cupcake to make this guy think I was a good parent?

I‘m staying at a hotel with a rooftop pool. Thought I‘d go for a swim in the evening tonight around 7.30 PM. There was a group of spanish men,a bit louder, jumping into the water etc. and another swimmer that was just swimming his laps. I was like ugh whatever I‘m here for myself and minding my business. I went to the other corner and undressed quickly. While I was swimming one of two guys that were left from the bigger group (the other guys left in the meantime) said Ola as I was passing by. Greeting in spanish. I just ignored and looked straight forward, as If I haven’t heard it. I thought damn that’s a bit rude of me I‘m really bitchy but I‘m also not obligated to talk to anyone!? So yea, so be it. As I was swimming he asked me if I was also in the city for the festival I think. I was really in my own bubble but think he asked me that. I genuinely didn’t notice but also wouldn’t respond even if I did. So i unintentionally ignored again. Then I left the pool and walked towards my towel, passing near the two guys. Again, Hello! Ola! Ola! I just had a poker face and sat down far away to dry. No eye contact nothing. Felt uncomfortable. I‘m 25 they were max 35.
Then when they were leaving he yelled „Bye!“ a few times..like you know by now I dont speak to. Is this like making fun in front of his friend? Like a power thing? Cat calling? Because it did feel harassing and unnecessary honestly. I mean its dark outside and there’s one girl in a bikini and you are constantly talking even thiugh she doesnt look at you once? Am I too rude or just protecting myself?!
Thanks.

Game Information

Game Title: Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door
Platforms:

• Nintendo Switch (May 23, 2024)

Trailers:

• Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door – Overview Trailer – Nintendo Switch
• Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door — Our Story Begins — Nintendo Switch
• Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door - Nintendo Direct 9.14.2023

Developer: Intelligent Systems
Publisher: Nintendo
Review Aggregator:
OpenCritic - 89 average - 100% recommended - 29 reviews

Critic Reviews

CGMagazine - Jordan Biordi - 9 / 10

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is an excellent remake of an excellent game with enough modern additions to make it feel fresh and new.

COGconnected - James Paley - 90 / 100

Thousand Year Door is a remake done right. The new sound and visuals look terrific. The game’s essential identity has been preserved. Plus, the original release is able to shine through with no distractions. It’s exactly as wonderful as you remember it being. I’m still impressed with the writing, and the level design is mostly excellent. I still hate the tournament arc, though. And I wish some of the puzzles didn’t involve scouring a dungeon until a forgotten button or door is dragged into the sunlight. Although the original release is amazing, it’s also nearly impossible to play anymore. For new and old fans, Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door is an essential addition to the Nintendo Switch library.

Checkpoint Gaming - Edie W-K - 9.5 / 10

Nostalgia goggles haven't failed us: Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is still a masterpiece. With vastly improved graphics, a great rearranged soundtrack, and a few tasteful gameplay touchups, Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door for Nintendo Switch is now the best version of this fan-favourite classic. The only thing missing is extra content for those who have already played it, but for everyone else, there's no reason not to pick this one up.

ComicBook.com - Marc Deschamps - 4.5 / 5

All in all, Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is an easy recommendation. For those that never got a chance to play the original game, there's no better time than the present, and the Nintendo Switch version is easily the best way to play it.

Console Creatures - Bobby Pashalidis - Recommended

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is a masterpiece that continues to enchant nearly two decades after its initial release.

Daily Mirror - Scott McCrae - 4 / 5

Though Hellblade 2 has the power to force your jaw open and give you goosebumps, too often the whole project ends up feeling like a very expensive tech demo – an absolute tour de force of technical achievement bogged down in its own sense of gravitas and mystery. Keeping you off the stick for so many of its most impactful moments, and not giving you enough to play with when you do have control, hobbles the potential of this visual and aural masterpiece enough to make the whole experience feel like it was constantly trying to find a foothold on that dread Icelandic scree, and never really getting to its feet until you come staggering over the finish line.

Daily Star - Tom Hutchison - 4.5 / 5

Overall a beautiful looking game, one that feels fresh and in-keeping with recent modern Mario efforts.

Digital Trends - Tomas Franzese - 4.5 / 5

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door stands the test of time and is fantastic on Nintendo Switch.

Digitec Magazine - Domagoj Belancic - German - 4 / 5

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is a classic Mario role-playing game that every fan of the chubby plumber should play. If you've already played the original, it's worth taking another trip into this paper world thanks to the completely revamped graphics and soundtrack.
The simplified role-playing mechanics and the interactivity of the turn-based battles make the game accessible even to beginners and players who don't usually like RPGs. The numerous environments impress with their quirky humor, excellently written characters and a beautiful paper look. What I didn't like were the annoying backtracking passages and some tedious mechanics. They unnecessarily slow down the pace as the game progresses.

Enternity.gr - Nikitas Kavouklis - Greek - 10 / 10

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is a magical combination of parameters that make this title must have!

GAMES.CH - Benjamin Braun - German - 87%

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is still a great mixture of RPG and platformer with fine papercraft graphics and humorous story. But in terms of content, the visually advanced Switch version delivers nothing new for dye connoisseurs of the GameCube original, which makes it less interesting for them as for players who experience the remastered version for the first time.

Game Informer - Kyle Hilliard - 8.3 / 10

Thousand-Year Door is now a series highlight. It marks the first instance of where I didn’t want a Mario RPG to go (I generally prefer the Mario & Luigi direction), but the constant fourth-wall breaking, myriad colorful and unique characters, and its willingness to just be weird all lead to a joyful journey.

Glitched Africa - Marco Cocomello - 9 / 10

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door Remake is wonderfully crafted for modern hardware while still capturing the magic and love of the original 20-year-old game. There’s a reason this is a cult classic and now everyone can enjoy it.

God is a Geek - Adam Cook - 10 / 10

Whether you're replaying for the new visuals, or a very lucky first-time player, Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is one of the best RPGs ever to come out of Nintendo.

IGN - Logan Plant - 9 / 10

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is an amazingly loyal and visually dazzling remake of a treasured RPG, and the improvements made throughout easily make this the definitive way to experience Mario’s unforgettable quest.

Nintendo Life - Alana Hagues - 9 / 10

For 20 years, Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door has been held as the best Mario RPG of all time, and the Switch remake proves it has earned that title. This is a fantastic RPG adventure, whether you're a Mario fan or not, with some best-in-class combat, brilliant writing, and a few little creases ironed out to make this the definitive way to play Thousand-Year Door. We wish there was a little more to do post-credits, but there's no doubt about it, this is a beautiful-looking Switch remake and a must-play RPG.

Nintendo News - 9 / 10

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door for Nintendo Switch improves upon the GameCube classic in almost every way; not just with its impressive graphical overhaul, but with plenty of quality-of-life changes and additional content too. As long as you can handle some occasional backtracking and a reduced frame-rate of 30fps, this is undoubtedly the ultimate Paper Mario RPG experience. Mario games usually put the narrative to the wayside to focus on having fun and engaging gameplay, but The Thousand-Year Door manages to do both and succeeds at it in such a way that still hasn’t been topped 20 years later.

Press Start - James Mitchell - 9.5 / 10

Paper Mario: The Thousand Year-Door is a masterful remake that improves on the original in practically every way while keeping everything that made it a mainstay in the Nintendo canon. While its timelessness is reflected in the strength of its humour, wit and story, a major visual overhaul and much needed quality of life improvements make The Thousand-Year Door an adventure that can't be skipped.

SECTOR.sk - Michal Korec - Slovak - 8.5 / 10

It is not a full-blown remake with overhauled graphics or new episodes. But deep within lies truly one of the best parts of the series to be enjoyed even 20 years later with excellent gameplay, sharp-wit writing and funny dialogues for long evenings or short bursts.

Saudi Gamer - Arabic - 9 / 10

Behind its vibrant and cheerful appearance hides a great battle system and a memorable cast of characters and events in a world brimming with content. Just be aware that some patience is required to enjoy the ride fully.

Spaziogames - Gianluca Arena - Italian - 8.2 / 10

The Switch version of Paper Mario and the Thousand-year door is a rare delight, just like the GameCube one before it: it's a funny and clever mix between a turn based RPG and a platform game, full of jokes and memorable characters. The price might be a little bit steep and the frame rate is halved if compared to the original, but it's still worth to dip your toes into it even twenty years later.

Stevivor - Ben Salter - 9 / 10

The Thousand-Year Door remake is a triumphant return for Paper Mario. It turns back to an earlier chapter in the series that knows exactly what it’s trying to achieve and does it masterfully.

TheGamer - Ben Sledge - 4 / 5

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door will probably be the last Mario game to release (solely) on the Switch. While Wonder will take the plaudits, porting this cult classic means that a new generation of players can experience it. New fans will have a ball, laughing along with Mario & co., even if their experience will be slightly marred by the backtracking and pacing. Old fans will enjoy the quality of life improvements and some new additions. Whether you’re a Paper Mario veteran or this is your first time entering his origami world, this is the definitive way to experience The Thousand-Year Door.

TheSixthAxis - Stefan L - 9 / 10

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is a wonderful remake of a GameCube classic. Now in a modern game engine, but with all the quirkiness and charm of the original story and characters, and with a return to the original Paper Mario combat style, it's great for Mario RPG fans and newcomers alike.

TrustedReviews - By Ryan Jones - 4.5 / 5

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Twinfinite - Luke Hinton - 4 / 5

While I wasn’t there for the original, I now completely get just why Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is so revered among Mario fans, and why demands for a remaster were practically ceaseless. It’s the absolute pinnacle of Mario RPGs, and if it was a bit more focused as an overall narrative experience, in the discussion as one of the plumber’s best-ever games.

VGC - Andy Robinson - 5 / 5

Alongside last year’s excellent Super Mario RPG remake, The Thousand-Year Door is one of the very best Mario spin-offs on Nintendo Switch, whether you’re an old fan or discovering it for the first time.

Video Chums - Mary Billington - 9 / 10

Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door is a classic RPG with a perfect blend of turn-based combat and adventuring complete with a rewarding unlockable abilities system that encourages you to explore every nook and cranny. Plus, its updated graphics, hilarious humour, and welcome gameplay improvements make it more accessible than ever. 🚪

Wccftech - Nathan Birch - 8 / 10

While the new Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door preserves the gonzo charm that made the original game a cult classic, not a lot has been done to deal with its padding and other design quirks. If you’re a hardcore Thousand-Year Door fan, worry not, you’re going to love this spiffy new version. If you’re new to the game or weren’t entirely sold the first time around, you’re still likely to find plenty to enjoy here, but you may also notice a few tattered edges.

Welcome to Reading The Big Book of Cyberpunk!
Each week we (u/FarragutCircle and u/fanny_bertram) will be reading 5-ish stories from Jared Shurin’s The Big Book of Cyberpunk, which includes a curated selection of cyberpunk stories written from 1950 to 2022! We’ll include synopses of the stories along with links to any legally available online versions we can find. Feel free to read along with us or just stop by and hear our thoughts about some cyberpunk stories to decide if any of them sound interesting to you.
Every once in a while, we reach out to people who have more insight, due to being fans of the author or have some additional context for the story. (Or we just tricked them into it.) So please welcome u/RuinEleint who will be sharing their thoughts on "The Yuletide Cyberpunk Yarn, or Christmas_Eve-117.DIR" by Victor Pelevin!
“Deep Eddy” by Bruce Sterling (published 1993; also available in his collection Ascendancies: The Best of Bruce Sterling)
Deep Eddy is acting as a data courier to the Cultural Critic in Düsseldorf, right as the city goes through a Wende (a sort of anarchist “Purge”).

• Farragut’s thoughts: We’ve read Sterling before in Science Fiction. Eddy is a misguided libertarian creep who won’t stop hitting on his German bodyguard and is too dumb to understand the philosophical points that the Cultural Critic is making (for that matter, I’m too dumb to understand, too). He survives his time in Germany, but has learned nothing of value for his punk attitude. What’s the point of rebelling if you don’t understand why? The naivete and creepiness were a little too much for me.
  
• fanny’s thoughts: This did not work for me. Eddy is creepy and annoying. He keeps hitting on the bodyguard and she makes it VERY clear she is only there in a professional context. Eddy also seems to generally not have any clue what he is doing. He is libertarian and against something but no one seems to know what. He doesn't even seem to know what he delivered to the Cultural Critic.
  

“The Yuletide Cyberpunk Yarn, or Christmas_Eve-117.DIR” by Victor Pelevin (1996, translated from Russian by Alex Shvartsman)
A corrupt mayor’s computer is infected by a virus that causes chaos in Russia.

• Special Guest Ruin: This was a fascinating story to read. The way the narrative segued from a discussion on poetry to a darkly comedic look at a Russian city was remarkable. The author seems to like to start or lead with a theme or themes which seem to be only tangentially related to each other such as for example the name of the computer virus, or Gerasimov and his dog. But both elements circle back into the story and are crucial to its structure. As for the content of the story itself, I amused myself by imagining the events as being a movie that blended the stylistic elements of Tarantino and Wes Anderson. So we have brutal, bloody violence in increasingly absurd settings and the way it is all described makes it easy to imagine it all taking place amidst the highly stylized sets and characters we would expect in a Wes Anderson movie. Overall, I really enjoyed this story.
  
• Farragut: We’ve read Pelevin before in Modern Fantasy. First of all, this is a fantastic title for a story, period. Second of all, I just enjoyed Pelevin’s style here (via Shvartsman’s translation), with an omniscient narrator telling us about a completely ridiculous situation. It gets a little cagey with the identity of the perpetrator and the ending, but I’m very curious as to how darkly I should read it (now that I think about it, it’s directly connected to the original, so I should read it very darkly indeed). Shvartsman’s occasional footnotes were very helpful, however, especially with the context surrounding Gerasim(ov) and Mumu.
  
• fanny: Ruin's review is so good, I am not sure what to add. The style of this story fit the elements so well. It starts with a poem whose themes carry through the story. The footnotes were a really great addition and helped contextualize. The narrator keeps upping the ridiculousness until we get to the end and everything gets wrapped up.
  

“Wonderama” by Bef (1998, translated from Spanish by the author)
Lalo (or is it Eduardo?) wakes up every day in the most awesome life in 1974, but it’s revealed to be a lie and ends tragically.

• Farragut: Bef is a Mexican SF writer, a crime writer, and a graphic novelist, and honestly his whole bibliography sounds cool as heck. Told in a series of diary entries with some small interruptions, we follow a kid whose life is like a Mexican kid’s sugar-fueled dream. The reason for its inclusion in this thematic section of the anthology becomes clear however, and I yelled, “Noooo!” at the ending. Sigh. It’s very good!
  
• fanny: I am a sucker for diary entry style stories and this was no exception. Lalo’s life seems almost perfect, but it feels so off. The story feels progressively more off until we start to question everything. Also, yelled “Nooo!” at the ending. Very good. Absolutely loved.
  

“comp.basilisk FAQ” by David Langford (1999) (link to story)
A FAQ-style story that clearly describes a bizarre future where images on the web and TV are banned due to the risk of death.

• Farragut: Langford is famous for having the most Hugo wins (29), mostly for the Fan Writer category, but also Short Story (not this one) and Best Related Work (not this one either). This is a delightful story that made me think of it as a precursor to qntm’s later story “Lena” from Week 5 (though obviously only in general form). Apparently I love the faux-nonfiction style where some of the horror and plot is between the lines. The final FAQ about Microsoft was darkly funny.
  
• fanny: This was fun and very short. The FAQs related to basilisk and writing were great. It goes between funny, dark humor, and just dark. I liked the commentary on technology and software. I also really appreciate the standard response answers explaining they should post someone else. This is something I deal with often and this was great.
  

“Spider's Nest” by Myra Çakan (2004, translated from German by Jim Young; also available in the anthology The Apex Book of World SF 3 edited by Lavie Tidhar)
Spider, uh, does something? Is looking for drugs, maybe? But something else happens instead?

• Farragut: Çakan is a German writer from Hamburg, and after reading this story, I’d say Shurin made hamburger out of me, too. The main thing I got out of this story was that Spider really wanted something, maybe. I thought it was drugs, but he got angry at his dealer and then got super weird with his friend’s girlfriend? And then there was a Silver Spider, who wasn’t him, but maybe he plugged himself in to replace her? What is happening?
  
• fanny: Spider definitely wanted drugs from his dealer, Ant. I think. Ant got annoyed at something then Spider got into a voyeur situation (maybe). There is a Silver Spider in his dreams that makes him feel better. I couldn't tell if this was dream or drug induced or technology induced. The end is super weird and makes even less sense than the story. Spider might have done a murder on himself? I have been confused before in this anthology, but not to this level.
  

That’s it for this week! Check back the same time next week where we’ll be reading and discussing "The Last American" by John Kessel, "Earth Hour" by Ken MacLeod, "Violation of the TrueNet Security Act" by Taiyo Fujii, "Twelve Minutes to Vinh Quang" by T. R. Napper, and "Operation Daniel" by Khalid Kaki.
Also posted on Bochord Online.

21 F here and I have to say - it's so tiring to be fat, ugly, and extremely awkward. No one hardly bats an eye in my direction and my self-confidence is nonexistent. I can't remember the last time I was /genuinely/ complimented. I feel like I'm constantly complimeting others around me, and others are complimenting eachother, but I never recieve any myself.
Even in my very small friend group, they're amazing friends don't get me wrong, but they're always complimenting eachother, saying they're so pretty, thicc, skinny, funny, etc... And I just listen. I used to be pretty bright in middle ~early high school, taught myself fluent Japanese and Spanish, got all A's, was just generally pretty good at academics. Crickets.
I still remember when I was 13, my foster mom, one time, said that something I said was cute. So I tried so hard to do things that would make her compliment me again but nothing. Just fat comments and her dialing up the entire town when I did normal teenage stuff that she deemed as me being a terrible kid and ranting to them about me for hours on end. My foster dad SAed me and I would even encourage it sometimes even though I was so uncomfortable bc he would call me sexy, or beautiful, etc...
I just want to be loved, like genuinely. Every once in a while my aunt, who helps me out and takes me where I need to go, will say "you look cute" or smth but I can just tell it's not really genuine yknow? My mom has never really complimented me, she's not all the way there so it's not anything on her but the other day she said she misses my long hair because it used to make me look pretty and it kind of triggered me ngl, especially bc I've been growing it out and am so self-conscious about my hair. I'm just so tired of feeling this way, why am I so unloveable?