Hey there! I am Lila, from the philippines. I am 5'2 Half Chinese and half filipina. I am currently in my last year in college hooing to get long term BF that I can banter with, have meaningful talks with as well as intimate nights or days with.
My hobbies are watching series, mostly sci-fi, mystery and some classic animes. I am currently finishing Criminal Minds. I like to sing, cook and play video games too.
My offer consists of daily communication, selfies and vids about my daily life through out the day and cater to your fantasies and hot desires whenever we feel like it. I can sext, make naughty vids and pics depends on your liking, and twice a week video calling preferably during weekends so no school distractions. I don't have kinks but I am willing to try yours, not afraid to try something new and might like it. 😉
Rates: 100 USD to 150 USD a week depends on how often you want to connect NSFW wise. 300 to 350 if one month.
Please be advised that I will only send NSFW stuffs once the payment has been made either full or half of the weekly or monthly payment if you got trust issues. No lewd or teaser pics too don't message if you are just horny at the moment and doesn't want this to be long term.
I only accept Pàypal gift cards, Pàypal, Bitcoin thru binance, and skrill.
I can verify thru a personalized pic or video depending on your liking, or 10 sec vidéo cáll to know im not catfishing or a creepy man🤣. Strictly sfw
Hit me up if you are interested. I hope you have read up until here so we won't have to waste each other's time. ☺❤

So First of all; Not my mothertongue, I'm on mobile and work nights shifts. So yeah sorry.
But yeah. My (29f) first language ist Russian. I'm fluent and still can write and read it. And me and one of my co-workers had a discussion about what we heard, we obviously weren't supposed to understand and she found mine quite funny. So here goes;
So I had two guests checking in. One of them (the one who booked the rooms) a Tattoo Artist (TA in the Story) with AMAZING Makeup skills. Like she was looking so gorgeous! I told her so, 'cause why not? We spoke in English for first because she was from the Staates I just showered her in compliments and she did the same to me.
Went Something Like that; "Shit. J Just LOVE this contouring. How did you so that?" "Oh yeah this technique would be SO GREAT on your face. You have like the perfekt facial structure for that." "Thanks but your hair though! How do your get your hair so glossy...?" So yeah two women Just kinda vibing and getting along.
Then I ask her the question; "Yeah the reservation said you also have two dogs with you. Where are the cuties?" And before she could answer, her obviously boyfriend murmered in Russian; "I could be one for the both of you."
I just froze. She saw it and was Just Like; "Oh shit..." Her Boyfriend Just continued; "With two of them I would just..." Thankfully I kinda got my senses back and in Russian asked; "Excuse me?
Her Bf definetly needed more time than her, cause she started snikering right away while he continued With; "yeah I would let the both of you step in me." I then asked, in Russian, If he wanted to tell me something.
He went RED. Like tomatoes would be envious red.
The TA and me then went through the whole check-in in Russian. And i got this great message from my co-workers in the next day; " So the Girl in #xxxxxx appreciated you so much she left you a Card for her Studio and her number for it. If you ever are in Michigan."
So yeah. Thats my Story how me and an amazing Tattoo Artist from the Staates brought a man to his knees with giving each other compliments. Lol
TLDR; One of my check-ins had Russian boyfriend whi thirsted over female vibing Energy and one of my co-workers wanted me to post it.

So, I have a bestfriend (we're both girl, anyway), we know each other for five years. She had a boyfriend for almost four years now, they are on and off. She always tell me about him, how he is as a boyfriend, whenever they fight, she will asked me for advice even though I really know nothing about the guy aside of course from the story she told me. According to her, her bf is introvert and shy around people, which until now I believed. They are legal both side. On their relationship my bestfriend is the man, she always do the effort, she's visit him every weekend even though he lived far from the city, and she always the one who make the move but what I don't understand is why she never let us meet, sometimes I will jokingly tell her "what if I go to your apartment unannounced maybe I can meet him" or "when are you going to introduced us to each other personally". I am not a type of person who message her bestfriend's bf because I think that is crossing line and I really don't know the guy. Then one day, they broke up, I think they stop talking to each for almost a month, she did not tell me that until when I went to her apartment, whole I'm on my way to her place, she told me that there's someone she wants to introduce to me which made me excited because at last I am going to meet her bf, so when I arrived guess what, it's another guy whom I don't know, she told me, he's a coworker and there's something going on between them, I am flabbergasted! I also feel betrayed. I told her that I am so disappointed with her and went home. That night she also told me that her bf also came on her apartment and then a week after they are together again. It upset me because she's able to introduce that co worker to me but not his bf who's been with her for years. I just want know if it is normal although I understand her but these past few days I just can't help to think about it.
ps. sorry sa medyo magulong story and magulong grammar

I am not sure how to approach this but we lost my youngest sib in august. My sister has been struggling and has been fucking dealing with a shitty situationship too. It’s been really emotional and she’s come to visit me which was amazing as I live far out, but she has recently hit a rough patch as her and our youngest were Irish twins and her birthday was about to pass/just did. I’ve tried to be there for her and much as I can and our mother can be difficult. My sister and recently had some suicidal/self harm tendencies, which I have struggled (self harm) with for a long time and can relate. I wasn’t able to get to the phone bc of my sleep and work schedule the second night in a row my sister was struggling (I am on sleeping medication because of the anxiety of the way my brother passed and how I found out) and I always feel terribly guilty and afraid missing calls because of of this prior incident. Within days of my sister’s panic attack, my mom was claiming that she couldn’t talk because she was calling a hotline on Mother’s Day because she was suicidal. while this is all hard for everyone, and it isn’t the first time she has done this, it’s the first time she’s done it in tandem with my sister, and where my sister had expressed that she has reached out to a hotline because I didn’t answer and then woke up our parents because it was late at night, our mother just stopped responding to people on Mother’s Day and then apologized for being in a hotline because her “bad thoughts consumed her”. I’m not saying it’s easy for anyone, but I guess I don’t know how to help my sister. She doesn’t feel seen in her terrible situationship where this man was almost proposing to another woman and he was cheating with her and I don’t know how to tell her that she deserves better (will a hard slap or solid punch get my message across more to this man bc I see him when I’m back and she doesn’t need this hurt in her life on top of everything else and I know this fuckin kid and am willing to speak to him myself) but our mom is also super hard on her and and just a difficult person to deal with (I know I have it easy living far away) it just seems like between her love life and home life it’s enough to break someone (which is why I am on high alert when she calls me and is having those thoughts and sleep with my ringer on and just sometimes can’t even sleep because I can’t lose her along with losing my baby brother) I just don’t know what I can do. She’s successful and amazing and beautiful and wonderful but our mom lays a lot on me too and has since our dad died when I was pretty young and I just don’t know how to best support her I guess and I can’t lose her. But when my mother starts on me on top of her and makes this whole loss about her and asks us to “respect her wishes” and it’s something as natural as talking to your friends about the loss, as a fucking 27 year old who hasn’t spoken to people in that town in almost ten years and lives a 1k miles away!? it’s breaking me down and it’s breaking my sister down and I can’t get her to to come stay with my bf and I because of her work and I feel lost and I feel like I am going to lose her because of grief or lose my mom because she wants to win some imaginary “who is sadder” battle and I just feel lost and don’t know how to fucking help anyone anymore. My boyfriend and I had been planning to get engaged but he postponed it because I am so “anxious and sad” all the time. I don’t even know how to help myself let alone help my sister

Hello, i want to sell my bundeled TI5 Cache sets.

My Steam Profile: https://steamcommunity.com/id/InYourSpaghettiFace/
My Steam Rep: https://steamrep.com/profiles/76561198011477544
RULES:

• Selling for Keys/Arcanas or Paypal
• The buyer will go first. Roughly 10 % deposit.
• After the deposit we have to be friends for 30 days, after that the trade will be completed
• Please write me a message on Steam when adding

Items:

Set	Hero	Paypal [USD$]	Keys	Arcanas	Status
Apostle of Decay: Top, Front, Back	Necrophos	200,-	97	11	LAST ONE AVAILABLE, 4 Sold
Armor of the Unyielding Mask: Top, Front, Side, Back	Juggernaut	82,-	40	5	4 Available
Brawler of the Glacier Sea: Top, Front, Back	Tusk	50,-	24	3	1 Available, 2 Sold
Flowing Entropy: Top, Front, Side, Back	Spectre	52,-	25	3	2 Available
Beacon of Cerulean Light: Top, Front (Style 1, Style 2) Back (Style 1, Style 2),	Skywrath Mage	42,-	20	3	3 Available, 1 Sold
Garb of the Cunning Augur: Top, Front, Back	Rubick	39,-	19	2	ALL Sold
Serpent of the Emerald Sea: Top, Front, Back (Smooth, Fin)	Medusa	57,-	28	3	ALL Sold
Flowersong Tempest: Top (Style 1, Style 2), Front (Style 1, Style 2), Back (Style 1, Style 2)	Windranger	81,-	39	5	1 Available, 2 Sold
Fires of Vashundol: Top, Back	Doom	156,-	75	8	2 Available, 2 Sold
Echoes of the Eyrie: Top, Front, Back	Vengeful Spirit	40,-	19	3	3 Available
Knight of the Burning Scale: Front, Back, Elder Dragon Form 1, Elder Dragon Form 2, Elder Dragon Form 3, Elder Dragon Form Aghanim	Dragon Knight	200,-	97	11	ALL Sold

Rep
All negotiable
I am looking forward trading with you :)

All participants and characters must be 18+ I’m looking for a F roleplay partner I want to play one of the two ideas below.

1. I’m your best friends dad, you come over to see her as your upset because your bf dumped you, but she’s staying at her mothers. I invite you in anyway to try comfort you, but we end up doing a lot more.
2. This one is the same except your my friends mom and I have been dumped so come round to see my mate but he’s at his dads, you invite me in and it goes from there If you have any ideas of other roles or stories feel free to message me them or if you want to play out these roles but add thing or change them then feel free to do that too

All participants and characters must be 18+ I’m looking for a F roleplay partner I want to play one of the two ideas below.

1. I’m your best friends dad, you come over to see her as your upset because your bf dumped you, but she’s staying at her mothers. I invite you in anyway to try comfort you, but we end up doing a lot more.
2. This one is the same except your my friends mom and I have been dumped so come round to see my mate but he’s at his dads, you invite me in and it goes from there If you have any ideas of other roles or stories feel free to message me them or if you want to play out these roles but add thing or change them then feel free to do that too

So the last few years have been rough.
*note* if you're a "cheaters will always be cheaters type" tldr is don't bother reading or commenting
BACKSTORY 2019-2023 child nearly annual broken bones, lots of stress and specialist visits.
2018-2024 my wife got her associates as a medical assistant and is almost done with her bachelor's and final quarter internship while working full time and that has been hard for me. The lack of time for me and my son has really made an impact.
2019 I was injured at work and 2020 had my first surgery to try and preserve an ankle joint. That surgery ended up failing and while recovering I ended up mangling 2 fingertips in a wood jointer. 2020 I had to make the transition to a sahd on workers comp and have been since then. My lifestyle of hiking and fishing was upended because I could barely be on my feet 3 hours a day and uneven ground killed me not to mention the whole covid thing was pretty isolating.
All of 2021 was supporting her being a surrogate for a couple in City X (their egg/sperm). So, lots of trips checks and giving her injections. It was kind of proving myself to her because I was terrified when our son was born in 2017 and didn't help as much as I should have. Especially the first 3 months. Really, I didn't find out until later. We had conversations and fights at the time and id step up to do more and she would agree and tell me it was all okay. Then another fight saying I wasn't doing enough/anything and asking more and me being upset and confused. I guess at the time she was afraid to ask more, or tell me what she wanted, or her feelings, and the postpartum depression and initial feelings of abandonment didn't help.
Anyways the surrogacy went okay. I was there and supportive. Rubbing her feet and back. taking on extra load when she was tired etc. And hey I didn't pass out at delivery this time XD The end was a bit hard with 2 inductions needed and a massive 9.5lb baby and a stuck shoulder.
Then a few weeks after birth in November 2021 the nightmare began.
Out of nowhere she started hemorrhaging. She had to have an emergency D&C to stop the bleeding and scans showed a mass. Turned out the surrogate baby's placenta had some cells turn cancerous and attach to her uterus (Choriocarcinoma). 3 months later and the first 3 agent chemo failed, and her numbers were skyrocketing because it turned treatment resistant. They had to hit it with 5 types of chemo (EMACO) leaving future fertility a coin toss but more than a hysterectomy. By May 2022 the tumor marker was gone, but it was 6 months of intense monitoring and 6 months of monthly monitoring. The whole time she was in an intense spiraling depression questioning life. The meaning of all it, and how all her childhood trauma was fair. That no god would let a child live that. And questioning every decision in her life and wondering what things could have been like if she went a different direction. Feeling like she missed out on opportunities early in life. If this might be all there is (we have been together since she was 17). She said she felt like reality wasn't real and this was make believe at times.
Summer 2022 she made a new mom friend. She was pretty toxic and selfish. She used my wife for personal benefit and to go places. Yelled at her kids and treated the oldest from a prior marriage as less than (girl doesn't know her dad and when she mentioned she was part Mexican she freaked out and denied it because of how conservative and anti Mexican her new dad and his family is). Like never offered a dime, but expected food, gas, tickets, and gifts. She drove my wife nuts with that behavior. but she was desperate for a friend and loved her kids. Her friend would just talk shit about her partner pretty constantly and say my wife should be unhappy in her relationship too. Shit talking husbands behind their backs became like a mutual thing and I def hated it
Sometime 2023 she jumped into fantasy romance and fantasy smut /erotica. This progressed to an AI chat smut generator.
May 2023 monitoring was over and she was officially cancer free and had been on a health/mental health quest..
The mental health part started early in the year and she was seeing a therapist for depression and anxiety alone as well as her long list of childhood trauma. Off hand her therapist told her a few times she didn't know maybe just divorce me or something. I was super uncomfortable with this as it was completely outside her practicing scope and I didn't feel she should be providing relationship guidance, especially without me or the rest of the story. I felt a bit attacked and didn't even get the chance to give my perspective or account and felt that is pretty important after being here for a decade. A lot of negative points get omitted by her.
Summer 2023 she had some tough diagnosis for other chronic issues. Narcolepsy Dissociative Identity disorder Depression And a sleep disorder
I initially rejected this as I didn't want to accept these chronic and incurable conditions and insisted it has to be something else, that she's okay. It was taken as rejection of her.
Fall 2023 she reached out to a childhood ex bf a few states away and started an emotional affair. They kept in infrequent contact over the years and nothing ever came of it before. He has been unable to move past her or have meaningful relationships in 13 years. At first he pushed her away and rejected it, but after a month by Nov it was a thing. Texting saying I shouldn't worried because they dated before, but he ended up coming out as gay, calls in private, staying later after work. I gave it the benefit of the doubt but got burned. I found out in December the second time she wanted a private call in the car, and I checked her phone.
We started marriage counseling in Jan and I started my own therapy search as well as a condition of hers. She agreed to no longer contact the boy showed me the sent message ending it and blocked him. By Feb I found him listed in her phone as Saraa and found deleted texts and calls. In therapy she wanted to keep him as a friend and only friend and I tried this. She asked if a PO box would be okay for a birthday present, and I said no. That it crossed a line. It was also super close to Valentine's day. Next therapy I couldn't handle the anxiety and feeling physically ill when she used her phone, and we went through Jan again break off block etc.
In Feb the therapist recommended a separate space for conflict as we work on things. That too much conflict triggered her dissociative identity disorder. It was either a hotel as needed or a rv/camper. My wife was set on a camper and the only way to get a newer one was to add my credit/income to hers for a loan and I was uncomfortable on a $20k purchase. She assured me the intent of the camper was working on us and not separating/divorcing. She brought up me not having chores completely done all the time and I poured myself into it if that was making her unhappy over the years.
During this time in March I found out she got the secret PO box and had yet again resumed texting entirely deleting her logs. She had valentines gifts. birthday gifts, long distance electronic bracelets, and had an easter basket coming. Everything was put together into a box to be gotten rid of. That effort I had for chores and making everything spotless kind of died. Like there was that recognition that that obviously wasn't the problem. We lived completely separately for a few weeks until she could make a choice. We split our son and had almost zero interaction. Eventually she chose and I saw a notebook she used once in December. Basically she has started outlining a story envisioning herself as the lead character in once of her romantic fantasies and cast me and the other man as competing love interests
April and early may there was nothing. We did therapy and tackled our issues slowly. Together. Our future plans: college vs baby and the ticking clock of fertility and ifs after chemo. Etc
Last week she was going out for lilac picking and didn't text me for 2 hours and said she was at the beach. Later she showed me something in her email and I saw discord emails about a pw change and login. One bad gut feeling later and the next morning I see she deleted the discord emails and check our phone plan and her phone and see missing texts. I put in a phone record request for recent texts and text/call logs. She woke up and I said it did it and she said I was disgusting. Then admitted I was right.
She says after breaking it off she was worried he would hurt himself and just wanted to be sure he was okay and admitted to 3 texts and the discord call which i verified. Said that he was in therapy for his issues. She said she didn't want to bring it up to me because I would make it a fight and she thought she could just get away with a few texts to make sure. That she felt responsible for how much he had been hurt too.
So I did what I do with extreme anxiety and checked her work bag. I found an old journal they shared Jan to mid-march. Kind of confirmed again what was going on. Also revealed she lied to me about the trailer, or him? She couldn't get it without me and told him it was to work on separating from me easier. Yeah I kept pics in case this goes downhill because yeah, I'll gun for EVERYTHING. I'm sure that being tricked into signing a $20k contract under false pretenses for her personal benefit, secret po boxes, lying to our therapist repeatedly, secret texts, expecting gifts from the other man, career over spending time with family and a serious personality disorder on top of narcolepsy making a job hard to keep down wont do her favors at divorce/custody hearings.
So its all fresh for me again. I already have extreme anxiety and the autism doesn't help with reading/understanding people the best, although my gut intuition and pattern recognition are catching stuff fine.
WHERE I THINK I AM
Looking back, I can see that the personality disorder and narcolepsy are apparent. Dream delusion and memory issues from the narcolepsy make separating dream from reality hard as well as just recalling what happened. So whether not the "not feeling like reality is real" was a dream delusion or a full-blown dissociative episode... I can also see that messaging him was a "new" personality state. Maybe it's a manifestation of the trauma of nearly dying from cancer, maybe it's a fragment of her young identity that was created to survive her traumatic childhood resurfacing after nearly dying. But her interests and perspective massively shifted at that time and there was a clear separation between her with me and her with him. It was like this regression back to 15. Like she was molding an identity to fit his desires and interests. She took up tarot and witchy books, different music, painting, rockhounding (my interest), dried bouquets, dyed her hair and got multiple piercings. Even getting caught there was that click in her whole demeanor.
I can see how her friend may have jaded her towards me by all the shit she talked about HER husband. I can see that throwing herself into fantasy smut to cope flooded her with portrayals of unrealistic romance. That she progressed that by using an AI smut bot to hold those conversations with. Then she directly tried to process her own reality through the lens of those novels in that journal.
This "relationship" was "I love you, we can be together in 10 years". He wasn't going to leave his cushy job. Or his state. He didn't want to be a stepdad. He didn't want to support her career or have any involvement in it. She couldn't leave my state. Never saw illicit photos. No discussion of sex. It was like exactly what you think some lovestruck preteens would come up with. Like just a fantasy. No talk of bills or finances. Of moving. Of any substantial tangible entanglement.
Somehow that's easier to handle
I love her and don't want to leave her. But i desperately think she needs serious help and have told her I want her to do therapy 2x a month (on top of marriage therapy 2x).
I also think if a secret or deleted text happens again, I've got to take off the kid gloves and fight for it all. Cause well showing up at the dude's door would end in prison.
I'm sure this happening right as I fully got over last time and took a trust leap of faith on a "gay" friend that burned me will make it harder. I get the last few years have been garbage luck and I get almost dying can have profound affects though. She had been utterly loyal for 5 years (believe me I checked as we agreed to ie open book). Tying to see this with an open mind.
I get my exact expectations are muddy and part of this is just putting it into words to process for me, but I value if someone has any good input

Hi I'm 20F and this happened around 3 years ago. For proper context I will be explaining about my "friends" first. I'm sorry that this is a very longgghg one but I needed to get it out of my chest. Also forgive me for any grammatical mistakes as English is not my first language. I'll start with my 6 year long ex bestie Bee, in short she was a huge pick me. Since the beginning she used to insult me infront of boys to make herself look good. I didn't really realise it back then because I thought that's what friends do. She literally used to drag me around a bunch of boys and would call me fat, crooked legged and eagle nosed. Even my mom and my brother kept asking me to break the friendship but I was too afraid thinking I'll be alone. I always had her back though, she used to come to me crying if she's facing any issues in her life and I was there for her. I started my college around COVID time so the friends I made were through online meetings. Once we all met, we hit it off. It was really great!. My best friend in college was a guy named Shawn. We were really close and one day he came up to me and said "I like someone", me being me started investing who it could be. Then a girl named Penny from our friend group told me that Shawn had told her "someone likes you". I was like YESS I found it! And I did my part and now they are a couple. I was soo happy. After a month or so he came to me and said he wants to break up cuz she's too controlling and jealous and I took her side because I kinda understood her since he was still talking to his ex. It became too frequent though and I just told him do as you please. And one more important thing is her family is extremely strict like she can't even talk to a guy. So in college I used to sit in between them like they asked me to do that teachers don't doubt anything and complain to her parents. But the issue was I had to be around them the entire day and be ignored by them. I didn't mind at first but it got frustrating as time passed. I would try talking to them and they would just ignore me but they didn't want me to sit away from them either. The moment we walked out of college they would walk away from me leaving me alone. Next Anne and Chris. Mann are they messy. Anne had lots of boyfriends but we did not know it back then when we used to talk to her. Chris is a senior who proposed to Anne and she accepted it. One day a random guy texted me and asked me Anne's contact details and I refused to give it. He then sent me the photos of her kissing another guy. I blocked him and texted Anne about this and she accepted she was cheating on Chris. But Chris, Penny, Shawn and me were really close at this point. I told Chris about this and he confronted her, he said when she went to visit her hometown, she asked for a break and that's when the cheating happened and when she came back to City she dumped that guy from village and got back with Chris. Guess what, Anne went to Village again and she ghosted Chris. Chris started texting my then bestie Bee. I told both of them not to grow feelings towards eachother or to talk that much because I knew Chris only wanted to get back at Anne and whereas Bee would use Chris as timepass. I mean yeah it's their life but only I knew this about both of them. They were acting serious and both of them were my friends, i couldn't let them do this to eachother. Well they ignored me. They did complain about eachother a lottttt though and I gave the same advice to stop talking so much. Anne returned from her village and she got to know Chris is talking to Bee. She simply asked him to stop talking to Bee and he DID. He told Bee he doesn't want to talk to her and he texted me "I got my everything (Anne) so I don't need Bee anymore" Bee felt bad and I told her well atleast don't repeat it again because I know he will text you again and Anne will cheat on him again. In between all of this drama I met my boyfriend through a online game. I used to talk to him whenever Shawn and Penny were ignoring me and I stopped caring about them. And yes I had told them I felt very bad many times that they ignore me and for like 2 days when I was around them Penny would say "oh we should talk to her or she will feel bad" and then talk to me. It was embarrassing really. In short my boyfriend is a great guy who moved to my city. Mind you he was just 17 when he moved. He convinced his parents he needed to study in my City for ME. He made me realise how much more i deserved so I just stopped being bothered by my friends. I introduced all of them to eachother so they used to hang out without me as well. Penny asked Shawn to not to talk to me. Chris and Bee started talking again and Anne left Chris again. But both of them would constantly complain about eachother about how much they hate eachother. Another thing about Bee is the guys she was dating were usually my friends. Like I would introduce my friends to her and she would go snatch the boys up and would ask them not to talk to me. I didn't care because I wasn't attracted to those guys anyway. Once I told about my crush and she literally asked me "ask him to follow me hehe". I was like wtf no I can't ask him to do that. She followed him. He asked me "why is your friend following me and sent a message request" I told him the truth cuz I was just fed up with her. He blocked her lol. He told me not to have friends like her. Anyway she started texting my boyfriend as well. She used to say "when you come to City let's go out to eat, buy me that, buy me this blah blah blah". Little did she know I had his account and I knew she wasn't "busy" so she couldn't reply to me. She needed 2k because she borrowed it from her mom to give a random guy lol. He never returned it but she was crying so I asked my bf to lend her 1k for now. He told her "return to my gf in cash since my mom can see my transactions". She ghosted me after he gave her the money. I confronted Shawn and Penny. I told them I don't want to be their friend anymore because I was there for them always and whenever I texted them they would straight up ignore me. There were some rough words. I told Bee about this and I cried because I did share good moments with them. I also told her they are planning an outing for which they will invite Bee just to spite me and told her I'll feel very bad if u go. She went :). I just asked her to return the money asap and wanted to end it all. The thing is they hated eachother so why go and meet them when I am the one who is helping you when you are in need? Not just the money, I was standing up for her in so many occasions.
She said she can send the money online because she knew I can't say ok to that. I asked her cash she ignored me. I kept asking her decently. I got fed up and texted her mom asking the money and then Bee replied saying "don't act so cheap and text my mom" I'm like huh? If I'm cheap then what are you for taking the money and ghosting me? I told her I'm just asking what u owe me so give it. She said ik y you are asking, it's because I went out with them right, i didn't even know u would feel bad. I told her consider the money as charity and get lost. Blocked. Whereas Chris talked shit about my friend group so I fought with him and he said "you are a b'tch and you don't deserve anything". This happened before I broke friendship with Shawn and Penny and they never stood up for me. Shawn and Penny were beside me standing and seeing me arguing with Chris and said nothing. While the only reason I fought was for them. Funny because what happened later proved who deserves what. My boyfriend moved to City (nobody believed he would come). I topped my last 3 semesters(I was tutoring them during exams and wasted my time before. Now both of them were scoring Avg marks and Penny even cried in class after seeing her marks and mine). I got placed in a huge MNC Company (Chris being my senior was working as a janitor in a clinic, not to shame but just saying). Shawn and Penny apologised to me later on for talking to Bee after we broke out friendship because they realised the kind of person she is. Shawn also mentioned that she had asked him for money but he said no even though he had it lol. Chris and Bee were in a short toxic relationship until he dumped her again for Anne. Bee is also now with no real friends or no real boyfriend and was seeing hanging out with her sister on her bday(I used to take her to Cafes). I would have been with them if I hadn't met my Boyfriend. I don't regret the friendship because I did my part as much as I could. So AITA?

Hi I'm 20F and this happened around 3 years ago. For proper context I will be explaining about my "friends" first. I'm sorry that this is a very longgghg one but I needed to get it out of my chest. Also forgive me for any grammatical mistakes as English is not my first language.
Bee: I'll start with my 6 year long ex bestie Bee, in short she was a huge pick me. Since the beginning she used to insult me infront of boys to make herself look good. I didn't really realise it back then because I thought that's what friends do. She literally used to drag me around a bunch of boys and would call me fat, crooked legged and eagle nosed. Even my mom and my brother kept asking me to break the friendship but I was too afraid thinking I'll be alone. I always had her back though, she used to come to me crying if she's facing any issues in her life and I was there for her.
Shawn and Penny: I started my college around COVID time so the friends I made were through online meetings. Once we all met, we hit it off. It was really great!. My best friend in college was a guy named Shawn. We were really close and one day he came up to me and said "I like someone", me being me started investing who it could be.
Then a girl named Penny from our friend group told me that Shawn had told her "someone likes you". I was like YESS I found it! And I did my part and now they are a couple. I was soo happy.
After a month or so he came to me and said he wants to break up cuz she's too controlling and jealous and I took her side because I kinda understood her since he was still talking to his ex. And one more important thing is her family is extremely strict like she can't even talk to a guy. So in college I used to sit in between them like they asked me to do so that teachers don't doubt anything and complain to her parents.
But the issue was I had to be around them the entire day and be ignored by them. I didn't mind at first but it got frustrating as time passed. I would try talking to them and they would just ignore me but they didn't want me to sit away from them either. The moment we walked out of college they would walk away from me leaving me alone.
Anne and Chris: Mann are they messy. Anne had lots of boyfriends but we did not know it back then when we used to talk to her. Chris is a senior who proposed to Anne and she accepted it. One day a random guy texted me and asked me Anne's contact details and I refused to give it. He then sent me the photos of her kissing another guy. I blocked him and texted Anne about this and she accepted she was cheating on Chris.
But Chris, Penny, Shawn and me were really close at this point. I told Chris about this and he confronted her, he said when she went to visit her hometown, she asked for a break and that's when the cheating happened and when she came back to City she dumped that guy from village and got back with Chris.
Guess what, Anne went to her Village again and she ghosted Chris.
Chris started texting my then bestie Bee. I told both of them not to grow feelings towards eachother or to talk that much because I knew both their intentions weren't good. I mean yeah it's their life but They were acting serious and both of them were my friends, i couldn't let them do this to eachother. Well they ignored me. They did complain about eachother a lottttt though and I gave the same advice to stop talking so much.
Anne returned from her village and she got to know Chris is talking to Bee. She simply asked him to stop talking to Bee and he DID.
He told Bee he doesn't want to talk to her and he texted me "I got my everything (Anne) so I don't need Bee anymore" Bee felt bad and I told her well atleast don't repeat it again because I know he will text you again and Anne will cheat on him again.
My boyfriend: In between all of this drama I met my boyfriend through an online game. I used to talk to him whenever Shawn and Penny were ignoring me and I stopped caring about them.
And yes I had told them I felt very bad many times when they ignore me and for like 2 days when I was around them Penny would say "oh we should talk to her or she will feel bad" and then talk to me. It was embarrassing really.
In short my boyfriend is a great guy who moved to my city. Mind you he was just 17 when he moved. He convinced his parents he needed to study in my City for ME. He made me realise how much more i deserved so I just stopped being bothered by my friends. I introduced all of them to eachother so they used to hang out without me as well.
Penny asked Shawn to not to talk to me.
Chris and Bee started talking again and Anne left Chris again. But both of them would constantly complain about eachother about how much they hate eachother.
Another thing about Bee is the guys she was dating were usually my friends. Like I would introduce my friends to her and she would go snatch the boys up and would ask them not to talk to me. I didn't care because I wasn't attracted to those guys anyway. Once I told about my crush and she literally asked me "ask him to follow me hehe". I was like wtf no I can't ask him to do that. She followed him. He asked me "why is your friend following me and sent a message request" I told him the truth cuz I was just fed up with her. He blocked her lol. He told me not to have friends like her.
Anyway she started texting my boyfriend as well. She used to say "when you come to City let's go out to eat, buy me that, buy me this blah blah blah". Little did she know I had his account and I knew she wasn't "busy" so she couldn't reply to me.
She needed 2k because she borrowed it from her mom to give a random guy lol. He never returned it but she was crying so I asked my bf to lend her 1k for now. He told her "return to my gf in cash since my mom can see my transactions". She ghosted me after he gave her the money.
Friendship break:
I confronted Shawn and Penny. I told them I don't want to be their friend anymore, because I was there for them always and whenever I texted them they would straight up ignore me. There were some rough words.
I told Bee about this and I cried because I did share good moments with them. I also told her they are planning an outing for which they will invite Bee just to spite me and told her I'll feel very bad if u go. She went :). I just asked her to return the money asap and wanted to end it all. The thing is they hated eachother so why go and meet them when I am the one who is helping you when you are in need? Not just the money, I was standing up for her in so many occasions.
She said she can send the money online because she knew I can't say ok to that. I asked her cash she ignored me. I got fed up and texted her mom asking the money and then Bee replied saying "don't act so cheap and text my mom". I'm like huh? If I'm cheap then what are you for taking the money and ghosting me? I told her I'm just asking what u owe me so give it. She said "ik why you are asking, it's because I went out with them right, i didn't even know u would feel bad" Then I said "consider the money as charity and get lost". Blocked.
Whereas Chris talked shit about my friend group so I fought with him and he said "you are a b'tch and you don't deserve anything". This happened before I broke friendship with Shawn and Penny and they never stood up for me. Shawn and Penny were beside me standing and seeing me arguing with Chris and said nothing. While the only reason I fought was for them. Funny because what happened later proved who deserves what.

1. My boyfriend moved to City (nobody believed he would come).
2. I topped my last 3 semesters(I was tutoring them during exams and wasted my time before. Now both of them were scoring Avg marks and Penny even cried in class after seeing her marks and mine).
3. I got placed in a huge MNC Company (Chris being my senior was working as a janitor in a clinic, not to shame the job but just saying for the words he told me).
4. Shawn and Penny apologised to me later on for talking to Bee after we broke our friendship because they realised the kind of person she is.
5. Shawn also mentioned that she had asked him for money but he said no even though he had it lol.
6. Chris and Bee were in a short toxic relationship until he dumped her again for Anne.
7. Bee is also now with no real friends or no real boyfriend and was seeing hanging out with her sister on her bday(I used to take her to Cafes and she's the type of person who loves lavish parties, not hanging out with her sister). I would have been with them if I hadn't met my Boyfriend. I don't regret the friendship because I did my part as much as I could.

So AITA?
EDIT: The reason I am asking if AITA is because all of them and few mutuals told me it was wrong of me to dump them just because I had a boyfriend now and should have kept working on the friendship like I used to do before

My brain is so scrambled I hope this makes sense. I’ll answer any questions in this comments if anyone is confused about something.
November 2023(back story)
My Mom kicked me and my boyfriend out on a drunk episode. We moved into his moms Rv for two months after that and everything was fine. I finally escaped her alcoholic cycle and i felt peace. My boyfriend was struggling with finding a job, Im a hairstylist and have my license so i found work pretty quickly. I soon after that felt really depressed from working and paying our RV rent by myself. I folded unfortunately (some days i really hate myself for that) and got fed up with paying for things by myself. He doordashed while I was at work but it was nowhere near how much i was bringing in.
January 2024 I found out I was pregnant while me and my bf lived in the rv. It explained the massive emotional distress i was under. I was tired constantly and couldn’t eat. I freaked out and told my mom. She begged me to move back with her. And i did mostly because of the financial stress i was under while living with my bf. After I left my bf moved in with his mom and was able to secure a decent job. I was really sick during my first trimester and couldn’t work so I took a month off. I quit doing hair and started a childcare job because it was less stress on my back and I had flexible hours. Everything was ok while living with my mom, she would occasionally have her drunk episodes but i would ignore her because i did want to stress out the baby. BUT THIS PAST WEEKKKKKKKKK i actually can not do it anymore. I am currently 6 months pregnant (25 weeks exactly) and mothers day May 12 2024 my mom was driving back from houston with her boyfriend. I realized i hadn’t picked her up anything for mother’s day so I decided to run to the store. My other siblings live in chicago so I called them and asked what should I get her. We decided on something small since we all felt like she really didnt deserve anything but it was the right thing to do. I also decided to just go stop and get food on the way back because i was hungry. My mother sends me nasty text messages saying “bring me my car back now” “actually i’m leaving drive my car to her bf house” “i need to stop using her car” and a long rant. I called her and told her im five from the house i went to get food (i didnt want to ruin her surprise) but she still has a nasty ass attitude with me so i tell her im coming home now and she can get her car and he mothers day gift is in the seat since she wants to have such a nasty ass attitude and happy mothers day and slammed the apartment door and went to my room. That wasn’t even the bad part I got over it. She tells me she wants to take me to dinner the next day to apologize and talk. It never happens but idc I didnt bug her about it. But today i really wanted Chili’s and was like can you pay for my chili’s since you stood me up on our lunch date. mind you she has been drinking all day. and when i say all day i mean all fucking day. So i personally dont feel comfortable letting her drive me anywhere or go out in public with her. She says yes and gives me her card. I go out and get my food I’m taking my sweet time because im off of work and I really didn’t want to be home with her. she text me to bring her something back but i didnt see it until i got in the car. I know for a fact she didnt have plans because she was so drunk. so i texted her and told her my bf planned for us to see a movie i was going to meet him at the theater so i’ll be home later. she says no i want my car and starts going on a rant about her car. i tell her im bringing her car back. she continues to text me ignorant drunk text messages and says “stop telling people im drunk i have two jobs and go to work” im fed up with her drunkness and respond “its called a functioning alcoholic youre still a drunk” ik it was harsh but i honestly dont care because she is a drunk and im tired of being in the middle of her episodes. I’ll post Part two in a minute.

I'm looking for someone local. Please be interested in pursuing an actual relationship. If you're not ready or not looking for an actual relationship, I'm not the girl for you. I'm clingy, and I like my bf as obsessed as I am with him. I know what I want, and I don't like wasting time.
As for who I'd be interested in dating - someone with at least the same taste in music and who likes horror and tattoos. I prefer heavily tattooed guys, younger than myself (I don't look my age, as the picture should show), and having a motorcycle would be a bonus, but just a bonus. I don't currently own one, but saving up for a beginner street/sport bike.
My favorite band right now is Ice Nine Kills, but I'm also into Bad Omens, ADTR, Falling In Reverse, Sleep Token, Chris Webby, Ekoh, Motionless In White, and some Korean hip-hop/rap.
For movies, I'm kind of a horror flick fiend. I don't care if it's jump scare, gore, thriller, slasher, or b-rated horror, I'll watch it! My favorites include Psycho, Halloween, Nightmare on Elm Street, Evil Dead, and Hellraiser.
I love coffee and other caffeinated beverages, dark fantasy books, Korean food, tattoos/piercings, crime dramas, serial killer documentaries, and cupcakes.
That's pretty much me in a nutshell, but of course there's a lot more to my personality and interests. Let's talk! Send me a message or a chat - either one works. Since I posted a picture, I'd appreciate one in return.
https://imgur.com/a/1r85PDm

I'm sure many of you guys have experienced this. They could be the most attractive and charming person, but if he doesn't find the time to talk to me or hang out regularly, it just makes me feel unwanted. I get that some people just live very busy lives. I work 2 jobs and have commitments outside of work, but I always manage to find time to spend with my loved ones. I just feel that unless you work back to back 12 hr shifts, you can always make time for someone if you actually like them. And I don't even expect to see someone every day or talk on the phone for hours. I just want maybe a good morning/good night messages, checking in, something. And if you're busy, just say that it doesn't have to be so complicated.
My last relationship pretty much ended because he wouldn't communicate and would ignore my messages to the point I got tired of feeling like I had to beg just to talk to my bf. Maybe people will say I'm desperate for attention, but I feel it's just the bare minimum for a relationship.

So, I've kind of posted about this in other threads, specifically on askreddit, but by some users request, I will do my best to fully relay this entire tale up to the current point, as well as provide as much context I am able (and will provide missing context if asked in comments).
TL;DR
A friend of mine of 4 years drank himself into liver failure and his wife cheated on him, so I offered him a free room to try and put his life back together, and I was repaid for the thought with a divorce of my own, but honestly, it's probably not that bad.
Part 1: CONTEXT
Me and my wife have been together since early 2014, and married in late 2017. We have been through much together, including two extended deployments, one of which was 10 and a half months long. We have traveled the world together, lived on both coasts of the US, and despite much of our struggles and how things eventually went down, I was always convinced we would work as a team to overcome any issues.
The friend in question was, largely, an online friend. We met playing an MMO during covid and we quickly formed a very tight knit, but small, community that were very close that included me, my wife, my friend, his wife, and 4 other friends. Covid was a wild time and I was surprised how easy it was to form friends in this group and we kept in touch, as a whole, even once quarantine had ended and most of us had moved on from that particular game. This was a group that, while it started online, we have met most of these people several times IRL and had vacations to spend time together and just hang out.
Part 2: His Problems
Fast forward to about January of 2024. My buddy, from here on out I will refer to as Z (and for a quick add, I will refer to my wife as D), contacts us to tell us his condition is dire and he has been diagnosed with stage 4 cirrhosis of the liver as a consequence of his extensive drinking. Shaken, we quickly charter a flight out to visit. Within a week, we're staying with him and his wife and his roommate and a couple members of his family who are taking care of him. This man is bloated, yellow, and probably about 350lbs now. We are worried, but stay supportive and positive that help can be found, especially since he seems keen on changing his lifestyle for the better. Some of his family start a gofundme that we donate to, and many of the people in our gaming circle who have grown close also donate several thousand dollars (One member of our raid team donated 10k. You never know who is stealth rich on the internet I guess). Me and several other friends discuss the possibilities of helping him get on disability and even getting ourselves tested as compatible living donors. Sad, but hopeful, we depart about a week later, and stay in constant touch.
About a month later, I'm getting a call from one of our mutuals letting me know that "Hey, so I may have goofed up." and tells me how Z's wife had visited him and had a 3 way with him and his wife. I am obviously irate at this and turn to back Z up with comments like "So much for in sickness and in health, huh?" I do what I can to stay supportive, and my wife, D, also makes it a point to stay in touch with him as he has found himself banished to the couch of his apartment. Not even allowed to sleep in his own bed and frequently uncomfortable even being in his bedroom to use the PC.
I'm not particularly rich, but I am not poor either. I served in the military and have a high VA rating which means a constant income and have a steady job and a couple side gigs that pay well enough. My love language, in many ways, is gift giving. I pride myself on being able to pick a good gift, even if it's a little early for an occasion such as a bday or christmas, and will often pull the trigger on something if it means a lot or I think it will help. In this case, my brother was selling an old steam deck because he wanted a new OLED model, so I figured "two birds, one stone", and buy the steam deck off him and send it to Z so we can still game together.
In the intervening months, Z and D start playing games that I have no interest in (Disney Dreamlight Valley), but I am happy to play other games and hang out and chat. Really, nothing seems amiss, but since his banishment, me and my wife are both pushing for him to come and take up the spare bedroom we have in our home. Soon enough, I buy him a plane ticket and he arrives with little more than the clothes on his back and we take him in, no cost other than the expectation that he might help around the house a bit (he was a chef, so having a cook and someone to help clean was ideal for me who often did not have the time or energy to handle these tasks as thoroughly as I would like).
Part 3: The Incident
Now, I am skipping ahead a little bit here, but there's not much to be said about the time between. My wife worked part time hours, and when she did go to work, she'd have him tag along just so he wouldn't "Sit and stew with bad thoughts" at the house alone. I will admit that throughout this entire ordeal, I have had several, several times where my brain tried to warn me, but I ignored ALL of those signs because I trusted him, but more importantly, I trusted her with my life.
One new, frequent argument I found myself having with her was she would fall asleep on the couch, and when I finally tried to go to bed, I'd do my best to wake her and drag her upstairs. These became extremely frequent occurrences and I expressed to her how frustrated I was that I had to fight with her just to come to bed so we could sleep (mind you, this is not even about sex. Often I'm taking her to bed at like, 1am and I work at 7, so I really just wanted her to be sleeping in the bed). Hell, one time, I started catching the vibes that the longer I sat and waited for her to be ready to go upstairs, she just never would be, because they were waiting for me to leave so they could talk in hushed tones. On THAT particular night, I went upstairs alone with her finally awake, and she did not join me for another half hour.
Finally, the day arrives. Its Sunday. We are all downstairs hanging out. One of their newest habits I can't really stand but just dealt with is that she'd sit and crochet while he doomscrolled or strummed on a guitar I bought him and listen to music videos on youtube endlessly. Eventually, I grow weary and give my wife a kiss and tell her I'm gonna go upstairs and play some GW2 for a bit.
About an hour passes, and she enters the game room and tells me "I am uncomfortable. I really need to talk to you. Oh, you're dying!" (As she entered the room, I immediately turn face to talk to her and disregard the game, but she decided that my Charr was more important that what was about to happen, so she of course warns me.) We step into the bedroom and close the door.
"You're going to hate me," she says through tears, "me and Z kissed!" At this point, my brain short circuits and I recall one of my first thoughts being "Oh lord, here we go." and just a general desire to not be a part of this conversation. Shock sets in almost immediately. Still with a healthy dose of denial, I talk to her about what had happened and told her that it needed to end. Even at this point, I did not want to send this man home. Was it shock? Denial? Probably a mixture of the two, or some other additional emotional responses. She gets up after some discussion and goes downstairs, promising to shut him down, but comes back about 15 minutes later sobbing "I couldn't do it! I couldn't end it..." (Side note: In my confused haze of a mind, I feel personally threatened, and after she leaves the bedroom, I lock the door and grab a metal water cub I keep at my side and prepare to actually fight if it comes to it, but once she returns, I back off that idea again.)
Talking with her more, I present her with two options; Couple's therapy, or divorce. BOTH of these options are world ending to her, and she even goes so far as to suggest that just because I said the "D word" that it was what I wanted, which was objectively untrue. We talk back and forth about things I don't quite recall at this point, aside from one point where she comes back and locks herself in the master bath and tells me to call 911, she doesn't care, because she's going to take a bunch of pills, but after a couple of hours, Z shows up to the door and knocks and asks if he can come in. I tell him he may enter, and we talk for a bit. After about 5ish minutes, we decide to go downstairs to the living room and continue the discussion.
Once I sit down on the sofa, I immediately feel like I'm being positioned as the bad guy. I'm in the corner of our sectional, and she's on my left, he's on my right. She tells him "He said it's either a divorce or couple's therapy." "Oh, so he gave you an ultimatum?" I continue to argue that yes, those are the two only options. Z tells me "You're not being fair to her emotions. She is telling you there is another option." I am thoroughly baffled at this statement.
D: I didn't think it was possible and I didn't mean for it to happen, but I have fallen in love with another man. My heart has room for two. I truly have two soulmates. I have never been happier than sleeping on the couch next to my two boys.
Z: There is no reason you guys can't stay married, and we can explore what we've found. I mean, look at how happy she has been since I have been here!
Sick to my stomach, I get up to go vomit in the toilet. Now, I wore a silicone wedding ring, and often find even with a hand wash, a little water tends to get trapped under it. After I finish and wash myself up, I come back and am playing with my ring to dry it. She sees this as a sign that I am uncomfortable again wearing my ring, and takes off her ring as I sit back down and hands me her wedding ring.
Me: Uh, excuse me?
D: This is what you want, I can tell.
Me: No? I was washing my hands and water gets stuck under my ring...
D: Oh... I thought... okay. (And she takes back her ring from me)
I tell her, very clearly, the options are to either end things with him, or end things with me. At this point, I'm still in shock, but sober in mind enough to decide that this is not worth fighting over. I will not argue with my own wife my merits or why she shouldn't just pack up and leave with a jobless, now essentially homeless man, and if she cannot figure that out herself then I will eventually move on.
Crying, sobbing, she sits down in front of him and says, "I'm so sorry, I fought for you. I really did. I told you I'd fight for you and I failed. I loved being your girlfriend, but I need to be a good wife and stay."
Z says "Alright." and starts to go gather his things to leave. As he does, she grabs him and says "No, wait! Please don't go. I don't know what I want."
Z: Ok, well if we're getting all this out in the open, I want to say this. I love this girl. I love her with my whole heart, and without her, life is not worth living. I will not leave this house if you (me) tell me to. Only her. You are taking this very well right now, I can tell you want to hit me (Still in shock, no, I can genuinely say that emotion or thought had not actually registered outside of the event upstairs earlier), but this is my stand.
D: OP, we had a good run. I'm sorry.
And with that, I get up and go to get my sandals and leave the house to get some air. As I try to go, she runs to the door and he follows her. She pushes the door closed and says "No wait, please!"
Me: No, this is the deal. I'm going out to get some fresh air. I am not threatening self harm to "win you back".
D: Will you be back?
Me: I don't know.
Z: Man, I'm telling you, you don't understand, you think I am your enemy, but I am not.
And with that, I leave and shut the door.
In the about, hour, I am gone, I drive around near the house and I call my supervisor who I have a very good relationship with (and I did not want to involve direct friends or family yet because I'm afraid it's too early to start spreading this news). I go over to her house nearby and we chat shortly. After our talk, I have at least something of a clear head and go home, with words for both of them.
As I arrive home, there is no one downstairs. I go upstairs. His door is closed. I knock on the door.
Z: Uh, one second.
I wait for about 5 agonizing seconds, but I refuse to be shut out of rooms in my own home and open the door. He is shirtless, and she is hiding in the corner just out of sight of me. I look him in the eye.
Me: Really?
Z: Yep.
Me: Get out of my house.
And with that, they both silently pack their things and leave.
The second I hear the front door close, I start calling people. I am not above pettiness, and the first person I call is her mom, whom I have a good relationship with. She is SHAKEN and immediately calls her. (I find out later that it was a particularly harsh verbal beating by her, but it really doesn't change anything.)
When I come downstairs to check the state of the house, I see her wedding ring on the counter. I call out of work the next day and lay down and hope I die.
Part 4: Her Problems
So, there is some additional context that I did not add in part 1 because a lot of it is red flags I ignored over the course of our relationship that, in the days following, started to become more and more obvious. There are many that I spent much effort playing off or covering her for, but I will try to briefly list much of what I see as glaring issues in the relationship that were never remedied.
This woman is 30 years old and cannot drive. She can drive and HAS driven my vehicle at the start of the relationship (albeit illegally), but after one tiny little accident where she hit a pole and knocked my side mirror off (which she paid for and fixed before telling me, it really wasn't a big deal. I was on deployment), she never drove again. Attempts to get her behind the wheel would end very quickly after they started, and the conditions to get her in the seat were often extremely time limited, scheduled, or something would come up, and every time I told her "okay, this month we're getting your license for sure" it just wouldn't happen and I'd end up feeling like the one who was at fault.
She does not have her Bachelor's degree because she did not turn in her final project for one single class. Not only that, but she has never truly pursued a career with the things she learned from the coursework, or even used her AA.
For half of the relationship, she did not work at all. When she did, it was often part time work, and if she was saddled with full time hours or, god forbid, overtime, it was a world-ending affair. She would come home and constantly be tired from her few hours at work and would do little more than sit around and crochet.
Our agreement when we bought our house was that she was going to work full time and we were going to split household duties, but I would definitely scoop the cat box because she was allergic (but she wanted cats) and wash dishes (because she hated them), and she would do laundry (because I hated it). In practice, all her version of laundry turned out to be was to throw loads in when one of us was out of clothes and just hit wash and then rotate, and then leave all the clothes in a pile on the bed. EVERYONE KNOWS folding the laundry is the worst part! Come on! Men's clothes are easy! I don't wear that much! (When we would fold, I often finished in a third of her time and would just hang out and chat until she was done)
Ultimately, this meant that for many years now, she was working barely more than part time if she was working at all, and would sort-of do laundry. Meanwhile, I am scooping litter, folding laundry, doing dishes, doing all related yard work, doing all the household cleaning, handling all the finances, I did MOST of the cooking, and all of the grocery shopping (often going alone), driving her from work if I could (she'd uber it if not) and picking her up and driving her home, as well as just generally being a chauffeur for her for 10 years, while working a full time job and a side gig online. Many nights I'd have to stop what I was doing to pick her up at closing hours, and then would sit in the parking lot for 30 minutes while she did tasks like vacuum her little crystal shop that she definitely could have done before close so I didn't end up waiting so damn long. Then we'd come home hang out and eat while we watched TV, and then if I wanted to try and go upstairs to do another hobby, I'd be silently guilted about it because she wanted to sit on the couch and crochet.
Part 5: My Problems
I am not perfect, and admit I have flaws. One of her favorite things to claim to our friends now is that I was "emotionally neglectful", and if there is truth to it, I think I can pin down the day. Before I started working full time again, I was going to school on the 9/11 GI bill. I was not a good student in my younger years, but in time, I have become rather good at school. My first two semesters back I easily maintained a 4.0 GPA. Over the summer in 2022, I, woefully, decided to take a Calc 2 class online because I could not find one in person and wanted to be ready for Calc 3 in the Fall to fill a prereq for my bachelor's, and I really liked the instructor for that Calc 3 class. This calc 2 class was painful. The instructor had clearly recorded all his lectures during Covid and we were simply given the full course of videos and given work assignments and said "Email me if you have questions." This is not how I learn, but I figured, hey, it's one class. I'm working again, but one class isn't a huge deal. I can knock this out.
I was wrong.
After the second exam, I had a low C in the class and I knew I couldn't keep up. I withdrew from the class feeling no other option. I tend to be pretty good at math, and ultimately my dream was to work with 3d printing on an industrial scale with a Mechanical Engineering degree- and if that failed I had my military history (which is engineering relevant) and a degree to fall back on and work should come easily. After clicking that withdraw button, I saw those dreams vaporize. After that, I threw myself into my government civilian job full time and slowly fell into depression. By the end of our relationship, with the toll of doing 99% of the work around the house and for her and with my dreams dead and buried, at age 33, I would wake up and pray I died. I would never kill myself, but I wanted to just die. I felt backed into a corner. I still did everything I could to support her and hoped that one day, she would pick up some of the load and maybe, just maybe, I could go back, but that day did not come (At least not in the way I expected).
Part 6: The Aftermath
This post is already too long, and if I include every single detail that has come to light since, I might actually hit the post cap, but I will go over at least some of it here.
I have had my friends come out in droves. Both of them have been effectively exiled, at least from what I can see, from every friend circle we have. After a couple of days, they flew back to live with, I guess, his parents in Vegas while they sorted shit out, because after I spoke with Z's previous roommate, he adamantly explained he was tired of all the "fucking drama" that Z had been bringing into the house and was just done with it.
I have spoken with many, many people and gotten even more context and even receipts of some of each of their conversations to our mutual friends, and some of the shit I read is just hilarious. He is "not ashamed of pursuing happiness, he is just sad that people got hurt". She is "coming to terms with emotional neglect and felt trapped, but now, yes now, she is free."
I got my neighbors to watch the cats, and took my dog up to visit my closest friend of 20 years and spent about a week and a half drinking, smoking, and talking about all this while surrounded by some of the most beautiful nature the US has to offer. Truly, without this man, I don't think I'd have gotten this far as quickly as I have. He really has been a lifesaver and I truly, to my dying day, will always appreciate him.
Paperwork has been filed, we wish to remain on good terms, and one day I still do hope I can be a friend to her, but she is woefully immature and incapable of adequately performing in an adult society. I have quit my job and am returning to school with a much lighter budget and will be getting that degree I desperately need.
It's been hard, real hard. I have put every ounce of my being into this relationship, and I truly felt like she was part of me, and nothing like this could ever happen. But it's that trust that allowed this to happen. I do not hate her, I'm just disappointed. I will pick up my pieces and, hopefully, find myself whole again soon.
Part 7: Rambling anecdotes
These are some stories I wanted to include in the previous body of text but didn't feel like it kept the same flow (if there even is any at all, I'm not proofreading this). If I remember any others after I post, Ill just toss them in the comments.
Early after Z came to live with us, my mother came to the house to drop off a package. I am pretty sure I was at work, but when my mother came to the door, both of them answered the door and the way my mom describes it "First of all, do you answer the door at your friends house? Also, the way he hovered over her made me uncomfortable. They were in the doorway and he was right up behind her poking his head out." She said my wife had told her that I was feeling unwell and was upstairs sleeping. I can't even be sure at this point.
Shortly before all the things happened, my parents were going out of town to celebrate their own anniversary, and I had agreed to dog-sit their 5 month old puppy (who, while cute, has WAY too much energy and was EXTREMELY difficult to handle, and I have raised several dogs at this point). We met up and took the dog, and then ALL of us (including Z) went to dinner. At dinner, my mother looked at my wife and asked, directly "And so how long have you been married? 6, almost 7 years? Well at least you missed that 7 year itch, huh" and my wife shortly followed with a comment about how she was not hungry and did not eat dinner that night.
All of this happened WHILE THIS CRAZY PUPPY was running around the house, and part of me thinks he pushed this to happen when it did because he could not stand having to help take care of this dog any longer (2 days).
About a week after all this happened, my wife did not text or call me, or respond to any messages or emails I sent her (I didn't send many, but they exist). Frustrated, I text her and tell her I need to talk to her about logistics moving forward, specifically about her belongings. She told me "I will talk to you when I am ready." We did not talk for another week. Also, she told me to stop talking to her mom. (I have a good relationship with both of my in-laws and while her step-father tried to remain impartial to the best of his abilities, he gave me some of the best advice I could possibly have gotten at that time, mostly about how to move forward and cope, as he has personally dealt with this with smaller relationships 3 separate times in his life which he gave me details on, and we are still on good terms.)
Their favorite TV show to watch together was Outlander, which, if you aren't aware, is basically a story about a woman who time travels and has two men in her life.
One of our biggest constant points of contention was my friendship with an old high school buddy (who I spent much of the time in the aftermath hanging out with while healing). We believe, with good reason, that she hated this man because after I had almost been hospitalized for psych reasons due to stress, he had told me I needed to talk to her about working again and doing more to help around the house. She figured out, obviously, who was telling me to say these things, and sent a very, very angry text to his wife. They all apparently made up, but I know she never let that grudge go.
One of the fairly recent hobbies I got into was D&D. It seemed like a good fit for all of us. She loved fantasy and gaming, I enjoyed 3d printing and story telling. She needed friends, and a party of people hangin out would give her at least a few connections to start. Every night she "participated" in D&D, she mostly sat quiet and did not do anything. Hell, I tried to get her to participate in 2 different games, and after she left the first one, she asked to just sit quietly in the discord call (This first one was online only, second was in person) and listen, which was super awkward. In the in person game, after 3 months of playing, she did not know how to play her character at all, and mostly spent her time at the table crocheting. (My buddy even made a comment about how at one point, he was proud of how good I was getting at DMing and I was giving particularly good exposition, and she interrupted me to hand another player at the table a dice bag she made. I don't remember it, but I absolutely believe this happened.)
The day of "the incident", she had a meltdown about how a friend of hers had ghosted her. I told her it was okay, she was much younger anyway and people grow apart. She's probably going through stuff and we should respect that path she's on. She cried about how she has no friends.
Also the day of "the incident", we were in the shower together and she told me she had met her sister's new BF on facetime. I asked "why did she break up with her old one?" "Well... she cheated on him." "Oh, that's a shame. Cheating is probably the most cowardly act a person can do to another. If you're going to start a new relationship, you need to grow a pair and end it before starting a new one." She clearly took my words to heart.
One of my biggest pet peeves about cleaning the house is our dog sheds, a lot. If I see a hairball roll through the house it immediately drains me a bit. We had a roomba. She would send that thing home when it started and never start it again. It barely ran. She would not vacuum.
One of the most common descriptors of her I've heard used by many people now that they're "allowed to" is "She was there, doing the thing with us, but it was like she wasn't there."
Something she thought that I apparently hadn't figured out by the time we talked after everything happened was that they had been talking since February. I told her I wasn't stupid and had figured it out already that this wasn't out of the blue.
Z's wife is currently pregnant with the baby of the man she cheated on him with. (And he is also married)
Anything else I remember Ill leave for comments, I know there is much, much more.

I was with my ex for a year before he broke up with me. Mine F (22) and he’s M (24). During our honeymoon stage we was so in love and enjoyed each other company. We met in late November and we were friends with benefits. We use to hang iut together. We use to sleep in my car to be together. No clothes and just a blanket. We didn’t care as long as we had each other. We were fine. When we were together we didn’t see no one but each other. I got pregnant in December and got a abortion in march. We already had a kid on the way and he wasn’t ready to have another one. He didn’t have a car, he worked at food lion, he had a apartment, and he didn’t have much. I didn’t want to the abortion but it was the best decision at the time for us. I use to help him get his son and pick me up. I picked him up from work, pick him uo from interviews, helped him get a new phone when his old ine got messed up. I always helped him out in anyway and form. This was in the beginning of 2022.
We moved from the situation. We talked about it and were happy. We moved in together in October 2022. It was the worst and happiest decision ever. The beginning was fun. We stayed up late and watched movies. We did normal young couple stuff. I loved it because i got to be around him 24/7 with no one else beside his son. We were a little family. He would go out with his friends but he would always come back home late. He would always be the designated driver when they go out. None of his friends had a car so they used him. I didn’t like it and I told him I didn’t, they used him when it benefit them. He always worked overtime and was always at work to provide for us. I was conplain about us spending some time together like on the weekends but he was too tired from work and he would rather hang out with his friends. This went on for months. He invited people over who I didn’t know and he didn’t tell me. When he went on a trip to Atlanta, he needed helped getting back. His friends that were in his car didn’t have money and therir parents didn’t give him money for gas. He called me and told me to give him $100 dollars to get home. We started to fuss. I told him i’m not there to help him and he need to figure it out his self. He got mad and started to get loud at me about the money. I understand he was stressed and pissed about it but i gave him money to get there for gas and food and i gave him some money before he left. He should’ve had enough money. When i went on my trip he didn’t give me no money.
My birthday last year he broke up with me over stupid stuff. He layed around on my birthday and didn’t care. He got mad about it. I took him out and went to cheddars and I paid for it. I cried in the restaurant. He lied multiple times about why he did it. I cried for the whole month of august because i felt like i was not good enough for him. He went out every weekend with friends and ignored me. He only used me for sex. I cried to him and he looked at me like i was stupid and i made him bored. I was unhappy that whole month but he didn’t care. I went on a trip with my family, I was miserable but I faked it for my fmaily. He was out with friends when i was gone. He didn’t care. We were broken up for 2 weeks. He tried to get back with me but i said no. We got back together so way.
I got pregnant in October of 2023. He was unhappy about the baby. He wasn’t ready. He said he wanted to travel, get a house, build his self, grow and more. I was sad because i knew what he wanted me to do. He told me he wanted me to get a abortion. My last abortion made me depressed and sad. I got tired of it. Our lease was ending in November 2023. We both went back home. I was pregnant and emotionally. I needed him.
For two moths we were happy and excited to grow our family. We still had problems. He still went out with his friends. He went out with some girl and her mom to get me a Christmas. He never got me nothing. The last gift he got me was valentines day in 2022. He came to my house, I was mad. I told him i didn’t like her and that he need to stop talking to her. I told him, she likes him but he didn’t believe me. He said that’s his friend. One day she facetime him when he was getting a haircut. I ignored it but i thought about answering. I never trusted their relationship there. I still don’t.
Christmas eve, we was going out to eat. We came to my house to chill. I got out the care i felt like it was my time of the mont. I looked down and saw blood. I got scared and told my family. They told us to go to the hospital to see what’s going on. We went and waited for hours. I was scared but i tried not to show it. I knew it wasn’t normal to bleed when your pregnant. Wewent to get a ultrasound and the whole time i was scared. My boyfriend at the time cane with me (my ex). She didn’t say nothing when checking my baby. But at the end of the ultrasound she said she was fine and healthy. I was happy. Then we went to a room to talk to a doctor. They thought I had something so they gave me medicine for it but I was worried about the blood. But they said it would go away on its on. We were the last people to leave the hospital and we were tired.
For about a whole week of Christmas week, I bled. I was worried because it lasted too long. I told my family about my concerns. I couldn’t go see a doctor because of christmas and every one was out of work.
My boyfriend ( my ex) took me out for new years eve, we went to juicy crab. We fussed a little about dumb stuff. After he drop me off, he went to a party with friends. I just wanted to spend time with him. We didn’t live together anymore and i missed him. The next day I felt like i was in intense pain. It felt like i was on my period. It started at 6 in the morning and it lasted all day. I was throwing up and bleeding. I called my then boyfriend to come get me. He called the ambulance. He saw my bathroom and he was terrified. I felt weak and i could barely keep my eyes open.
I was still in pain when i got to the hospital. My family came to check up on me. I was too weak to care about my self and in pain to focus. They told me, my baby was trying to come out early. I was having a miscarriage. I was in the hospital for 5 days. I lost my baby girl on the third day. I was sad and i just wanted my boyfriend. He only came two days. He would go to work and then come stay the night with me. He still didn’t have a car. I cried every night when left alone. My mom kept me company when he wasn’t there. He called and texted me through out the day when he was at work. My last day at the hospital, i was ready to go home and get in my own bed. He didn’t text or called me on my last day. I had to tell his friend i was leaving the hospital to tell him. I felt sad because my boyfriend didn’t care about me or was checking up on me. We fussed about him not being there with me. He got mad that i didn’t let him drive my car to get to work and come see me at night. My parents would’ve fussed me out if i gave him my car to use. They told me not to give him my car.
That Saturday he was acting weird to me. He didn’t text or call me. He went out with friends to look at apartments a hour away. He didn’t tell me until the day of. We had two plan to when he have out baby girl. The first one was to move to raleigh and the second one was to wait until she was one to be able to talk and walk to move to raleigh. And we wanted her to be around family. I didn’t know he was still planning to move after everything. He was moving with his friends. I was sad he was moving on. I always got jealous when he would bond with his son. Everytime he was around me, he would call him friends to talk about the big move and what they was going to do. I cried because he didn’t care about me or my baby, he was moving on. It hurt that he never consider my feelings about everything and how i felt about it.
For three months, he treated me like shit. He would ignore my call and text messages. He acted like I didn’t exist. But he still would keep me around to use me to help him out. Helped him get to Raleigh to help his brother with his moving company, help him to get to work and more. I felt alone and depressed. I was going through postpartum. I wrote him a letter about everything from us to our baby girl. He didn’t acre about it. It took him a 2 week to read. I just wanted him to hold me and tell him everything was going to be alright. Everytime he was around me he jsut wanted sex. I took him to Raleigh to look at cars for him. He saw car he wnated and it was his dream car. A 2021 dodge charger. He only had $1,000 in his saving. Because he spent most of his saving trying to fix his other car that his friend he stayed with messed up. They wanted him to put down more on it. He looked at me and asked could i put down $650. I didn’t wnat to help him becashe never helped me and he treate me like shit after i lost our baby. Eventually i said yes i would put the money down to get the car. He needed insurance to get the car too so i put him on mines. I did too much for him. His birthday was days before he got his car. He was happy and i was happy to see i caused it. We just losted our baby so we both were going through it.
He posted on facebook and instagram like i wasn’t there or helped him get the car. I was mad because he didn’t acknowledge me or anything. But quick to act like he got it on his own. I loved him to death. He still treated me like shit afterwards. He didn’t care. He just used me. He was suppose to help me pay for my lawyer but he only gave me $200. My lawyer fees in total cost was $750. I paid all of it by myself. He still haven’t paid me.
Now he talking to different girls and partying. That’s what he wanted from the beginning. He was never ready to have a family with me. He still lie to me and tell me he see his self with me. and that he doesn’t care about me. I hide all our pictures and I delete our text messages. Everything felt like a lie with him. Nothing felt true or real.
I don’t want to get my feelings evolved with another person to hurt me emotionally. I don’t want to feel the same way i did with him for the past 8 months. I wasn’t myself. I don’t love him the same or see him as my lover. He feel like a stranger in his body. I still wanted us to start over and have a better start in life. I miss him and love him still. But i’m not going to wait around for him to come back to me.

hellos. it is me again. i am back with update about last post (if don’t know what i mean, feels free to check profile) will warn again, english is not best so if hard to understand, i apologize! but i have been practice more 😄
i finally am fully move in with bf. other night he let decorate a room to be girly because i always had dedicated room for art. i did not feels safe having one as soon as roommate allowed dog in house, but there is no dog to ruin me here. i feels so happy, safe, loved because he love me and respect me and there is no dog here to growl and act aggressive at me here. he always tell me how important i am to him, how much he love me and how he will make sure i stay happy with him.
a little over week ago (my birthday) roommate calls and ask for my part of rent money. i send her text about me move out and landlord should told her but she either ignore or didn’t receive message. she did not ask how am i, no happy birthday, no ask about where i have been. like they not notice i have been gone. now she reach out on my birthday of any day to ask for money for place i do not live anymore? i tell her i live with bf now and am sorry but no money for rent can come from me, especially now because i am looking for new better pay job. she sends sad message making me feel bad because she knows am really easy to make feel bad about stuffs that is not my fault. she says she is pay to get stuff for dog and wants to be a good gf and dog mom (what is that? i do not understand how can be mom to a dog?) and want to use money for that but needs money for rent too. i was confuse because should rent not be bigger importance? she can spoil dog later i think but no, she wants take money from me. cut it short my final answer is no and she does not respond message.
a few days later i happen to be getting out of car after buying hair products when they stop by taking stroll. i still wonder if they were going out of way to see me or if just happened to be walking around area. dog is barking and pulling on very weak and dirty leash. it does not look like the leash strong enough to hold dog of size, much less clearly aggressive pitbull. it not break around me but whole time i was scare leash would snap and dog would attack me. bf was not home he was at work so it was me, roommate, her gf, and dog. gf says they were taking walk and ask how i am doing. i tell her honestly, very happy. i did not mean to sound bragging in any way but not resist telling her how life has treat me now that i can feel safe in own home again. not scared to walk to another room for fear of be attacked. she act happy for me but she also looks so angry at me. i don’t know why? it is not like i told them to get rid of dog. do i wish they did? yes. not just because it is dog but because it is clearly aggressive. i realize now thanks to you all that moment dog was brought into home, they stop caring about me, their friend, for a dog that made miserable. even if i ask i doubt they would have rehome dog. i did what best for me, and i guess them, and move in with man who love me and would not hurt me like that.
as we are talking dog looks like ready to take bite out of me, pulling on leash. i wondered if both were angry enough to let dog loose to intimidate me just by way they were acting. i could not believe how quick we went from friends to me being scare of them and dog. while they did not say anything threaten exactly (we were catching up talk about life, i did because i did not want be childish), the body behavior and emotions were clear. they hate me for move out, but only notice because they need rent money? i tell them many time before i left that dog is making life hell but never listened. then i told was moving out before i officially did. when they brought dog with it felt like a threat, just having such dangerous thing around. like a warning and disrespect. “look, we only care about dog. here it is on very weak leash that can snap any time. we know how you feel about dogs and how scare you are, but not care about you anymore! by the way, can borrow some money for rent even though is not your responsibility anymore? here is sad story to make you feel guilt so say yes.”
i told bf what happen when he got home later that night, and he called them and said some very angry thing. i think he should have calm down (for his sake), but he basically told them never come my way again, especially with dog. that if they want talk, talk like adults and don’t include the thing that was a reason i move out. he said is dangerous dog and to not come crying to me when it gets put down because it kill someone or cause life change injuries. he can get very angry but he later tell me he just gets upset that NOW they decide to come sees me. NOW they want talk. we blocked both of them and i don’t really want be friends with them again because they toss me aside for dog like it was nothing. we went hell and back and it went down drain because of dog. not just any dog but badly train dog who might attack someone one day. i tell my family and they thinks am overreacting but i don’t think they ever understand until this happen to them. i mostly made post to tell you all am currently live dog free. am happy living here. it always smell clean, i can walk freely no fear. bf give me much love and attention. we have video game night or go out to eat or just be outside. i also got job for doordash today and am getting second job somewhere soon hopefully too because have interview tomorrow! it can get better, for anyone struggle living with dog. can be mentally drained but you are not alone. 🤗 thanks much for people that commented on last post. am thankful when people don’t make me feel crazy for saying dogs scare me and impact mental health in bad way. i don’t hate dogs for existence, just wish people could know that not everybody has to like them.

i've been friends w this girl for 7 years (let's call her grace). we have CONSTANTLY been on and off for those 7 years but always ended up friends again. for context, this girl is, to societys standards, PRETTY pretty. she has the ultimate pretty privilege and gets away with any and everything bc she is SO good at manipulation, having a smooth sweet voice, and just looking good in general. she had a period of having sexual actions with alot of boys in a short time span, but, 7 months ago, ended up with a boy and they have been dating since then. she has cheated in her previous relationship of 2 years twice, so me and my own boyfriend had suspicion she would cheat on this boy aswell. i recently got told a few stories by grace's BEST FRIEND (luna) of what grace has been doing in these 7 months. one of these things was talking behind my back to my friends (and luna) abt how she wanted to f^ck my bf, and just do stuff with him. (she said ALOT) she also said she "had him first" until i came along. (i spoke to him when he was 12, theyve been friends since maybe 11? i knew him when he was 11 but we didnt talk.) i was raging. she kept on saying that he tried to kiss her at a park once, when theyve never been to that park alone together. (so, spreading lies). next day, with luna, luna tells me shes said he tried to kiss her ANOTHER TIME. i call her and yelled at her telling her to shut her f^cking trap (infeont of a bunch of old ppl.. whoops) THEEENNN a few days later i went up to her and asked her abt it and her sweet voice made me forgive her for like an hour maybe? but when i got home i messaged her a paragprah basically saying i'm cutting her out of my life. she THEN messages luna saying shit like "____ is a paranoid psycho bitch!" "i will never talk to YOU again but i will talk to your BOYFRIEND! i dont even want your ugly ass bf." and MUCCHHHH more but i don't have the ss (i saw the msgs irl). i wen tto the park with some of my friends the day after, (M, J, L, Me and luna) me and luna tell the other 2 (L already knew). this got me stressed and angry (mainly bc eveyrone was interrupting me) so my boyfriend came up and we walked around, when i came back, graces bf was there and so was an additional like maybe three people? in our firsnd group. luna came to me and said that graces bf forgave her for chetaing four times (we had proof ?!) so i got REALLY mad, AND I SAW GRACE IN THE DISTANCE AND I WAS LIKE naww shes not coming here no way. got more stressed. i ran upt o graces bf and shouted at him saying i hated him so much because i love him (if ykwim) and i hated him and his actions because i care about him so badly, and i just hated him SO much. i teared up and wlaked away (towards where luna, L and my bf was standing, away from the rest as they came to greet me when i strolled baxk up) then i saw grace again and lost my marrrrbles. i shouted, threatened her, screamed, and this was all mainly because she spoke about wanting to f my boyfriend, then called him and ugly ass. did i mention she said he looks like he has a minge? to my face? when i confronted her earlier? he is literally the most mashcline man looking ?? (muscles, stubble, he only has long hair but thats because he is a fan of metal) i did that infeont of about 8 or more of my friends? including my boufriend. i then went to my boyfriend in anger and we walked Way together, he was shocked (because he has NEVER seen me shout like that before) i then cried to him for like maybe thirty minutes or so. i left my friends gc with abut twenty people and have barely spoken to them since. this was last week friday. only people ive properly spoken to since friday was graces bf, L, luna, and my bf. i dont feel terrible, shes been a pathological liar, a horrible person, a manipulator and gaslughter for 7 years now. she has done many more things rvenetly that provoked my snapping but tthose were ainly the things done that affected me and my bf. she has stolen from charity shops and luna even though theyre "best friends", and she attempted to gaslight luna into thinking she just found them (jewlery) somewhere but luna luterally made one of the bracelets stolen.
i am posting this here because most of my friends dont really talk to me anymore, and are just continuing as normal with grace, shutting me out instead of her. shes always been easily forgiven and me and luna assume its for her looks and voice. everybody is still friends wiht her, im the one who has suffered just bevause she tormented me so badly i could not keep it inside anymore
im open to questions abt anything
TLDR; friend was awful, screamed at her in public park infront of whole friendgroup, friends forgave her and treat her as normal but dont talk to me as much. i assume its bc i left the gc but im not so sure.
sorry for bad spelling, rrddit gets really jetlagged and super behind when im typing and i cant be bothered to go through everybspelling with this shitty ass jer lag oh my god i cant even see my self type. sorry for yapping, might be the autism

im gonna go into full explicit detail about everything that happened from a-z. and i want opinions
i met this guy at a social event and we clicked instantly (as friends because i had another bf at the time and hes gonna become relevant in the story). lets just call the guy at the event john and lets call my ex alex. me and alex broke up about 3 days after i met john and i started to develop feelings for john. me and alex ended up trying to “talk things out” even tho i was just attached and wanted the attachment to wear off. so we were “talking” but we werent exclusive and had no boundaries and i knew i was eventually going to cut alex off because i didnt see a future with him, i just was attached because we had memories and he was my first ever boyfriend
me and john liked each other, on october 7th we kissed. and about 4 days later i met up with alex and “hooked up” which i later found out he sexually assaulted me
i was avoiding john because the entire situation was hard on me and i was tired of having to choose because i was the first girl john ever liked and i felt bad about kissing him and i DIDNT want a relationship (at the time) slowly, john blocked me because he had enough and thats when i realized i didnt want alex anymore. i cut alex off for john. john asked me if i met up with alex after me and him kissed and i said no because my god forsaken self fucking forgot, as much as it sounds like an excuse, its not. i had no memory of seeing alex after me and john kissed. and so me and john started to become exclusive after we met up and talked things out. i told him i didnt see alex after me and john kissed.
we dated and we were so happy until we broke up for a few days because he wasnt ready for a relationship, we got back together and we were happy.
theres the part where i start to fuck up. and i wont deny a single thing i did
theres a guy named eric, or at least we will call him that. i used to “like” eric, not even like i just thought he was cute. nothing too deep. im friends with his girlfriend and she trusts me enough because she knows i feel nothing for him, but she trusts me to come to me whenever they have issues in the relationship because she KNOWS its nothing like that
theres another guy named timmy, timmy and eric go to the same school so theyre in the same class. timmy is spreading shit rumors about me and its no fucking rumor anyone could ignore. it was a rumor where i had a “sex tape”, have 3 bodies, and had sex with john even tho non of it is fucking true. it was getting so bad my friends were getting dms saying “your little friend had sex with her boyfriend and i have proof”. it was so fucking bad. not to mention, im a minor and i live in a small fucking country shit gets spread so fast here. and so i would go to eric as ask him about timmy because i was gonna take legal action against timmy because it was going so fucking far. and john didnt like that. because he knew i used to “like” eric. which i fucking didnt and i just thought the dude was good looking lol
and so i would only speak to eric to ask about timmy and i would let john know about. except this one god forsaken time where i didnt show a fucking continuation of a conversation and he got so mad he started threatening to break up with me
keep in mind, im an anxious attachment and im pretty sure john is avoidant even tho in the relationship he was surely an anxious so i dont know cause we havent spoken in a fucking month lmao
we both are borderline by the way.
so this is a part where i fuck up
the reason why i use the name eric is because eric is like someone who associates himself with eric cartmen from south park, he makes him his entire personality and its just a joke between him and everyone 😭 as immature as it sounds, i dressed up as eric cartmen for characters day in school and i showed eric the outfit because i thought it was funny and didnt think anything of it. i didnt show john but i didnt hide it from him either because i know john would go through my phone and i didnt see anything wrong with what i did, until he went through my phone and saw the chat, keep in mind, i do delete chats with my friends sometimes because i dont want john to see some things because of privacy, not out relationship, but between me and a specific few girls he doesnt like and doesnt want me to be friends with
and so he saw the message and got upset, and i took the hint that this guy just doesnt want me to interact w eric at all and i understood but i understood him way too fucking late and he broke up with me
which for some reason my dumbass was shocked even tho he made it clear that he didnt want me speaking to john so this is where i realized i fucked up
i took it as a lesson and learned to not do it again but i was too late
me and john break up and i wanted him back badly. an hour after the breakup i started posting on my story about a random guy that i made up and acted like i liked him to piss off john and make him jealous which was a bad fucking idea
to me, the more someone doesnt want me, the more i want them. thats how i thought it was
and he found out and got pissed off. he ended up texting alex and found out i met up with alex after me and john kissed. but no one was aware that i was actually sexually assaulted by alex and i found out later because my friend went through the same thing. me and john stayed talking to see if we could work it out and i fucked up by telling him to stop basing our relationship over something from the past that happened over 8 months ago. he got pissed and blocked me
i later found out he followed back the girl he told me not worry about and said he didnt know why he was attracted to her but at same time would say “i dont know if shes actually pretty or if im trying to move on” (as in move on from me) i got so fucking pissed, i texted the girl w my friend we and told her that john was using her and a rebound. john found out, threatened to ruin my life and was so fucking mad over it, but i later then realized he just thought she was pretty and didnt want her like that. i ended up apologizing to john because i wanted him back but it didnt work because he was standing on business lmfao
during this time, my friend told me he would always consider going back to me and missed me and loved me so much. and john did love me. a LOT. he bought me flowers, a ring, everything. like he did everything for me and he did love me so deeply
and now we havent spoken over a month and its slowly killing me because my friend who was close with him said he was dead set with his decision n doesnt wanna get back with me. i dont know if this will change because right now he has new priorities like studies since hes graduating soon. but right now, he seems dead set with his decision even tho his biggest fear was losing me. i saw the way he would talk about me and we were so deeply in love.
but john thinks i cheated on him with what happened with alex. my friend told him he sexually assaulted me but it was very vague and he doesnt know the details.
i was johns first love. first EVERYTHING. we broke up march 18 and last spoke april 19 where he thought i was shit talking him and i proved i wasnt. he later said he was worried about me but right now he doesnt seem to care.
please dont tell me to “let him go”. if u have any other opinions on what u think will happen and if he will come back please let know because i really want him back. my family friend who is a psychic told me he was coming back if this helps lol.
let me know if u guys think hes coming back. this is all fresh but yea.

So I had recently been in a relationship with my work colleague we got together 1-6-23 at a music festival I asked her out under the flood lights both drunk listening to great music which I thought was kinda romantic on my side. We discussed our future plans we both wanted a child and was planning on trying for a baby when she finished her exams (summer 2024). When we met I was 34M and she was 26F I was uneasy being 8 years older as I worried I was too old and at different life stage to her however she assured me not to worry. First problem started end of summer 2023 we had been together a good few months now although she was often busy and would go 5+ days without seeing me. So she was showing me something on her phone tinder notification popped up at the top of the iPhone which she swiped away. My heart sank I left it a few moments then said to her ‘why have u got tinder?’ Her response was that she used tinder to try and buy weed whilst she was on holiday in Greece with her gay male friend. He wanted the weed but couldn’t get phone signal so used her phone and she forgot to delete the app. I stormed out her apartment she chased after me and told me she loved me which meant something to me as I believe in love. From then on I didn’t trust her much and was wary of her actions when I was not with her. I chose to try and believe her story she did offer to show me the app as proof at the time also. Another issue she has an unhealthy amount of ‘lad mates’ she told me they are all camp and not to worry I did worry as I feel any man would. I would often bring this up and be shitty in text to her over these lad mates and her use of tinder. Fast forward New Years 2024 relationship was well. I did something amazing for her she had some shit on Google about her which I managed to get removed about her being in an anorexic clinic I also finally told her I loved her. We went to sleep but for some reason I woke up and felt an urge to check her phone I had never done this before but I had seen unread snapchats from male names which was wrecking my head. I opened them they were selfies weird. I then went into her archived WhatsApp she then began fighting me to get her phone back obviously because she was hiding something. She got her phone back and I caught her swiping a message away to delete it which she later denied. I broke down crying and tried to leave her apartment which she stopped me from doing. I then asked to check her Facebook and Instagram messages. I found her arranging to go on a date in August 2023 we had been together 2 months with a male uni friend so she told me he was anyway. Her excuse was she didn’t go and meet him and didn’t want to hurt his feelings? Why not just say u have a bf then. She was also flirting with a male work colleague we both knew saying about spooning together. Her excuse we was just bantering. Anyway for some reason I didn’t leave her then I made her change her profile pics to ones of me and her on everything to show she was with me to her social media world. We had a bad bust up on her birthday Jan 28 2024 I called her a fucking cheat via text on her birthday she went to leave me the next day I begged for her not to and we then went away together on holiday and became super close and in love. I felt amazing and better about us being together. However I then asked to see her WhatsApp archived messages recently she let me. I found hidden there a message from a uni lad mate again saying ‘are you still with your bf or have u got rid of him’. Weird thing to have archived I asked who is he why is he asking this. She gave me 3 diffrent stories about who he was one min he’s 29 then he’s 40 then he’s 35. I finally dumped her to many things now my head is totaly destroyed I’ve never felt so ill. What do you think?

Should I be worried that my GF (19f) is going to leave me (18m)?
This is a really long story so please bare with me.
Ok so first of all, you're all going to see that I'm not innocent in this but I just couldn't help myself as you'll see.
So for context, my gf and I have been dating for 3 months now at long-distance. I've visited her every 2 weeks since we met and I feel we really do like/love eachother.
However, there has been some road bombs since we started dating but this story only concerns one of them.
And it's important to note that my GF has had a few "crushes" and 1 or 2 short "relationships" in highschool before me. One of those includes a crush on a guy who we'll call Frank. This was at most just the 2 of them having a deep interest in eachother and they both knew. All of this being around 2 years ago.
In early April, my GF's older cousin got an invitation from one of her friends, who we'll call Oliver, to go to his Birthday Party. And he told my GF's cousin to invite all of her cousins if she wanted to. Including my GF.
And lord and behold, guess who was also going to the party? Frank.
And when Frank got word that my GF was going, my GF, who at the time told me all of this btw, said that Frank let out a joyful "yes" in response to her going.
Now, I obviously HATED hearing this, but I appreciated the fact that my GF told me when she didn't have to if she didn't want to.
So a week goes by and the party is coming up...
Everything is going well between us until...the night of the party. On the day of the party, we were both good as usual. We talked, called, she went to work just before the party and she sent me cute pics of her and all that stuff until after her shift.
After she finished work, she was immediately taking the bus to the party and that's when things went south. We called whilst she was on the bus and she suddenly became so cold to me. I can't explain it but she just became cold and her tone sounded mad at me. I kept trying to talk to her until she cut the call and texted me: "we're done".
I called her back and texted but she was still cold. I to talked her about all the things we've said and done and what they meant to her and she basically said "I don't care". I was depressed but after trying too much, I stopped texting.
2 hours later, at around 1am, I get a text from her calling my name:
"Toby?"
I answer:
"Yes?"
To which she replies "I'm sorry". It kept going a bit like that until she started telling me about why she ended it. And the first reason was because we were so far apart. And I'm like, ok sure, I understand that, but why not talk to me about it rather than making me feel so shit about myself?
That kept going for a bit and a few other things happened but aren't important. Let's skip to when she arrived back home.
As she was back home, in her bed, we continued texting. And this is when she told me the second reason as to why she ended it. Which was the fact that, a week earlier, I brought up how she's going to uni soon and that I was concerned about her meeting new people there and potentially leaving me. And I guess this kinda backfired because it apparently put doubts in her head about whether or not I'd leave her. So essentially, she ended it before I could, so she wouldn't have to endure that pain.
So we talked we talked we talked, and in the end, about 4 hours of reassuring her later, we got back together.
So the next day, we started talking about the party. And that's when she opened up about something. So apparently, Frank, had approached her during the end of the party when she wanted to go home and started talking to her about how he left his old gf and blah blah blah, obviously trying to show an opening but my gf didn't show any interest, allegedly. I didn't think much of this, even though once again, I HATED it.
Now let's skip to today.
So this is where I also become an AH in this. A week ago, when I was visiting her, she logged into her Instagram on my phone because her phone died. And when I left, she didn't log out.
So curiousity got the best of me. I snooped around in her DMS. First of all, there are absolutely zero guys in her DMS. Cool. But the main reason I was snooping was actually precisely because I wanted to see what she was gossiping to her close friends about, especially on the night of the party.
And as I scroll, I see something.
In one of her DMS with her friend, she talked about the moment Frank got word that she was going to the party.
And to cut it simple, she talked about how he was excited she was coming and all that until I see:
"I feel bad"
Her friend replies:
"About what?"
To which my gf replies:
"About thinking for a second about leaving Toby for Frank".
When I read this, my heart, dropped.
The next messages were her friend saying I'm better, my gf agreeing and all that stuff.
But then my gf says "put me back on the right path please". Like what?
She then went on to say that she knew Frank wasn't worth it regardless of what she felt and that she was just flattered in that situation. "As all girls are".
Needless to say, regardless of the fact that they said I was better, that hurt me like a mf.
And then in another DM with another friend, they talked about the moment Frank approached her at the party. And essentially, they said what I said earlier but in no way did my GF say anything like "No I'm not interested" or "I have a BF". In fact, she was talking about how bad his flirting skills were with her.
I feel so down rn after having seen all of that.
But it's worth noting that my GF expressed many times before that she doesn't support cheating in any way. She HAS good values (doesn't like exposing herself, partying often all that stuff) and she is a good person overall. And she has expressed recently as well, to her friends via DMS, about how much I make her happy and that I have no red flags or whatever. And that she loves me a lot.
So I just don't know what to think or do.

My mom acts as if it’s a problem that I’m getting older. She gets mad cause I’m not at the house as much as I used to be. She’s mad that I’ve been at my bf house for a week his car is down I’ve been giving him rides. She complains that I haven’t taken her where she needs to go but she hasn’t asked me to take her anywhere. She is so quick to say” I’m not doing anything for her” or helping her but I DO,but the second she gets upset it’s back to me “not doing shit for her”. She waits until I leave the house and then will send me these paragraphs about how I’m not helping and just complaining. But when I’m home and I see her she doesn’t say anything it’s only when I fucking leave ! When I was younger I asked to go to my friends cheer competition.. she told me yes. I went all the way there as soon as we got to our destination I got a message saying how could I leave my sick mama and no one else would have left their sick parent at home but I asked …I literally asked and she told me yea so why try and make me feel bad after the fact. I can never say how I feel because she says I’m being disrespectful . So I’ve never been able to say my true feelings causing this anger towards her that she doesn’t even understand. She has called me so many bitches the one time I finally said ma I don’t like when you call me that she did it 4 more times while looking me dead in the face. When I brought it up she said she was tryna see if I would say it back . Why hurt me on purpose like that. Everytime I’ve dated a guy it’s like she gets 10x worse and I just don’t understand why she hates them . When I was dating my senior year I only told her caused I turned 18 and figured she wouldn’t get so upset. Every day I came home from work she would come in my room screaming about how the bills were high and everything she a had a problem with about how it was my fault and screaming about my bf …even though she never met him. I lied and said I broke up with him she finally stopped screaming every day but why do I have to lie to get you to leave me alone. When I was younger I said “ma we just don’t get along idk why” “ maybe I could move out to make things easier in you “ ( bills and whatever else she was having issues with ) she stood up and starting pacing back and forth around me saying what am I gonna do about it ….and I was amazed like your ready to fight me because I said we don’t get along ???
So anyways I’ve been at my bfs apartment for a week giving him rides to work and going to work myself from his house. I was gonna go back home once he got his tired fixed . ( also I’ve paid rent for this month already) She sent me a message today saying I can move into my new apartment . ( meaning move in with my boyfriend) This whole week she’s texted me paragraphs every day complaining about me not being home or not helping her and things she has going on. Which I didn’t know anything about cause she didn’t tell me. But somehow it’s still my fault even though I didn’t know anything and she hasn’t asked me to do anything.
I guess I wanna know what you guys would do would you cut her off and just stop talking to her or would you still try to repair the relationship? She makes me so unhappy like miserable nothing is ever good enough!!!