Memory Transcript Subject: Carlos Jose Rodriguez, Mechanical Engineer, Florida Man
Date [Standardized Human Time]: December 29th, 2136
When Yalga passed out on the couch I sent a message to the family group chat making sure everyone knew of the situation.
I needed to get Yalga into the hospital, but I didn’t want to do it myself. Pyon also needed a sitter, so I was waiting for mom to come back so Salisek and I could focus on Yalga.
Me: Yalga burned herself on the heat pad. We’re taking her to the ER. Mom, could you come home to take care of Pyon.
Mom: WHAT DO YOU MEAN BURNED HERSELF?! We’re coming home!
Tarvik: On our way. We’ll help you take her.
I didn’t want to bother them, but I couldn’t complain. I needed help. While I waited for them to arrive I poured a cool glass of water for Yalga so she could hydrate herself when she gets up. I gently nudged her awake, which made her groan in discomfort as her eyes opened.
“Dad? What’s going on?” She asked weakly. Her voice was a little rough.
“I’m gonna take you to the doctor,” I answered bluntly. “I am aware, you don’t love doctors but these people can help you much better than me. I’ll be with you as much as I can, holding your hand. Can you be brave for me?”
My daughter nodded yes, so I got up and went upstairs to grab something we’re definitely gonna need. I also made sure Salisek got the news. She probably saw through the chat, but I needed to be sure.
I peeked into our room, or at least the room the girls were staying in together. “Honey?” I called the mother of my children. Salisek was cradling Pyon, trying to calm him down. Pyon was holding his teddy tight enough to cause some visible rips and tears. I need to ask mom to fix that later. “How is he?”
Pyon buried his face in Saliseks chest fur, and made some small whining sounds. “He’s scared. We heard Yalga scream and didn’t know what was going on. He soiled himself when he heard Yalga and has been crying for a while now. He only just stopped. He can sense I’m worried too.”
“You changed him right?”
“Yeah, although I didn’t think now was a good time for potty training. What are you getting?”
Salisek followed me to my mom’s room and watched me search around the closet. “Almost a decade ago, my dad was hit by a car. Something about the sensors being screwed up. He’s obviously fine now, but the car didn’t stop just in time so he broke a leg. Thank God that’s all he got. Anyway, he bought a wheelchair and kept it- Aha!”
I freed the simple contraption buried under a mountain of clothes dad considered put away and carried it downstairs.
“We’re gonna need this. It’s gonna be way easier to move Yalga.”
Salisek continued to cradle Pyon, rocking him back and forth, as she talked to me, “What do you need me to do?”
“Stay with Pyon.”
“No.”
“We’re not arguing about this. I need you to stay-”
“Pardon me, could you repeat that!? Have you forgotten that despite that fact we aren’t married yet we both signed as the legal guardians of both Pyon AND Yalga. Or did you want to call your barber for help?”
Hearing Salisek use her angry voice when talking about anything other than Exterminator and Federation bigotry felt like a punch in the gut.I tried to defuse the situation. That worked about as well as it did when dad tried it.
“Hun, that’s not what I mea-”
“MY-” Salisek paused when she remembered she was still carrying Pyon who was looking at her as if she yelled at him. “Oh, I’m so sorry pup just…” She shifted Pyon's position so he could bury his face into her fur to distract her. She softened her voice, but made it stern as steel. “My daughter is in an incredible amount of pain. She is scared, she is tired. I will be there. Pyon will come with, so he can see his sister being taken care of. I. Will. Be. There. For. My. Daughter. Am I clear?”
I help up my hands in defeat. “Okay. We’ll leave as soon as the family gets here.”
Saliseks voice and posture softened. “Okay. Again this time. What can I do?”
Seeing how serious she was, I realized doing this on my own was a stupid idea from the start. “Pack some snacks. I’m not getting overcharged for crappy hospital junk. And while you’re in the kitchen please grab more water for Yalga. I gotta make sure the bandaging is on well and she’s okay.”
“Okay.”
Salisek walked to the kitchen, still carrying Pyon. At times like these, I know I made the right decision marrying her.
“I love you sweetheart!” I called out.
“I love you too hun!” She called back.
I pulled the wheelchair out so Yalga could get in it. I could try and carry her, but unfortunately with her size and weight it would be better to transport her like this. Even if it’s a short distance.
“Daddy,” Yalga called.
“Yeah.”
“Are you and Mommy mad at each other?” She asked innocently. “Did I do something wrong? I heard Mom say my name.”
I knelt down to give my daughter an assuring kiss on her head. “No kiddo. We had a disagreement like all adults. It’s solved now. We still love each other.”
Despite her monotone voice, it couldn’t hide the tears building in her eyes. “Okay.”
I ignored it for the moment because she was probably gonna cry more in a moment. I opened the chair as much as it could go and gave the seat a nice solid pat.
“We’re gonna put you here, then we’re going to the Emergency Room.”
“Do I have to get up?”
“Yeah. You do. Grab my hand. We’ll go slow.”
Yalga held my hand and grasped it tight. I need to remember that she has a very strong grip. To keep her even I used my other hand to push her up from the other side so she didn’t have to do the work.
I’m so glad I go to the gym.
We slowly worked together to lift her up so she could sit straight.
“Ow, ow!”
“I know it hurts. Take your time.”
Once we got her up we had to get her into the chair. I thought about the best way to put her tail. Through the hole in the back? Would it just drag to the ground? Wait!
I went to the side of the couch where there was a thin blanket for me and Salisek when we slept here. If I can tie the blanket on the handles it can keep her tail up without squishing it. I just need to get her on first.
“Okay Princess. Let’s get up. Can you stand?”
“Y-Yeah. Um, Dad?”
Yalga awkwardly clutched her tail. “I need to use the bathroom.”
My eyes darted from the bathroom to the couch and back. “No better time to test the wheelchair.”
[Memory Transcript Time Skip: 40 Minutes]
Even though it was getting late the traffic was still a lot. Once Salisek was ready we both called our parents and they both said that traffic was heavy. With it being the last Saturday of the year, Florida residents and tourists alike were enjoying their day.
We decided to just meet at the ER. The blanket trick for Yalga’s tail worked well and it didn’t hurt too much for her to walk once she got up. However, sitting down hurt her a lot unless it was in the wheelchair. Her tail probably played a factor since it didn’t have a place to sit except on the side when dealing with regular chairs.
Once we got to the hospital I was pleasantly surprised that it wasn’t that packed. Because of increased tourism and parties things can get crowded this time of year. Thankfully that wasn’t the case today. I didn’t want my daughter waiting more than she had too.
When I opened the side door, Yalga was already half up just so she could get into a chair with room for her tail. I helped carry her down and rolled her through the hospital's parking lot.
Salisek was having a difficult time carrying Pyon. He was pretty nervous. “Mawmy, I don wan to gow en.”
I didn’t understand why Pyon was scared but Mawmy was able to calm him down. “It’s okay pup. This place is filled with very nice and smart people who can help your big sister.”
My daughter didn’t say much, instead she looked around the large hospital and took in all the architecture and bright lights at the front. The front and lobby areas were clean and comfortable which helped a little to ease the tensions of anyone going in with something they believe is serious.
I rolled Yalga straight to the front desk and we were greeted by the medical receptionist. “Hello, how may I help you?”
I smiled politely and spoke calmly, “Hello, I’m Carlos Rodriguez and this is my daughter Yalga. She was using a heating pad and unfortunately suffered some burns. I was able to patch her up a little, but the gels and methods we have are for humans so I want to make sure she can heal properly. I would also like a professional to look at other areas of concern dealing with her limbs and back.”
“Any pain, shortness of breath, chest pain, profuse bleeding?”
“Her back usually causes her pain and the burning made it worse.”
She gestured to my fiance and son, “Are those two with you?”
“The tall Venlil woman is Salisek, my fiance, and she’s holding our son Pyon. They came for emotional support and to assist with anything Yalga may need.”
“We’ll get you someone right away. Please wait in the lobby.”
“Thank you.”
I knew they probably wouldn’t rush us in since even though Yalga is in pain, there’s no direct threat to her life. The most they’d do is probably a tetanus shot. I suppose I’ll have to worry if Yalga reacts to needles. I’ll try to calm her down because I could tell Yalga was still tense. I rolled her to a seating area with a TV playing Tom and Jerry.
Peak Fiction
With all the stress Yalga was going through, there’s nothing like cartoon violence to ease the mood. What would also ease the mood is having the family visit which according to a message they just sent, they were already here just finding parking.
Soon everyone entered the hospital and after a quick chat with the receptionist, along with me flagging them down, they joined us in the lobby. Helen and Chalta ran to Yalga the quickest.
“Yalga, are you okay?!” Chalta asked. “We heard your back got hurt!”
Helen was about to tackle Yalga into a hug before I stopped her. “Helen, Yalga isn’t feeling well. Please be careful she’s in a lot of pain.” Helen was visibly worried but still gently gave Yalga a supportive hug.
“Get better soon please.”
Talice and Tarvik were surrounding Salisek, asking questions on how they could help.
“Mom, it’s fine, really.”
“No, it’s not fine. Your father and I are here to help so please be honest with us. We’ll help with anything you need. We’ll take Helen home soon but the moment you need anything we’ll be right there.”
“Why isn’t she seeing a doctor yet? What kind of place is this?!”
Mom went over to Salisek who was still holding Pyon. “I can take him sweetie, get some rest.”
Salisek cradled a stressed Pyon in her arms, “Do you wanna go with Grandma, little pup?”
“Gwandma.”
Salisek gently handed Pyon over to my mother who instantly knew how to calm him down. Salisek fell into the chair next to me. She was pretty exhausted and it was getting late. The stress of everything is what really made her worry. Seeing your child in pain isn’t fun. My father put a hand on each of our shoulders.
“Is everything alright?” he asked.
I looked over to my daughter who was trying to watch the cartoon with her sisters but still had a hard time focusing because of the pain, as evident by her trying to adjust herself. I gave her a tap on her shoulder and mouthed “how are you feeling?”. I could only hear a little whisper, but it was enough to understand she was saying “It still hurts.”
Dad could overhear what we were trying to say and knelt down next to Yalga. “What would you like to do when we leave?”
“I’m a little hungry. Can we go eat later?”
“Of course, anything you want.”
I was grateful for my dad, that we remembered to comfort Yalga in all this. I was so new to everything, not to mention the speed at which everything was happening.
…
Where’s the doctor!
“Carlos Rodriguez,” She called just as my patience was wearing thin. “We’re ready to see you now.”
“Thank you. One moment.”
I quickly talked with my parents and in-laws about who is going home and who is staying. My mom offered to take Pyon home and to tuck him in, Salisek agreed. Talice decided to go with and made sure to bring Chalta and Helen back since they knew they might get bored or cause trouble. Tarvik and Dad were conversing for a bit about who should stay before settling on Dad since he’s more familiar with the hospital.
Salisek gave Pyon a strong nose nuzzle, “I’ll see you later, okay Pyon? Mommy will be home soon. Be good to grandma, okay?”
“Owkay Mawmy.”
“I love you.”
“I wuv yu tu.”
Helen and Chalta gave Yalga a big, but gentle, hug.
“Get better soon.”
“We’ll play lots of games together when you get back.”
Everyone quickly said their goodbyes so it was just me, Yalga, Salisek, and Dad. We followed the nurse to a room and were asked to wait until the doctor arrived. Yalga was really on edge.
“Dad, are you gonna tell Odin about me?”
“It hasn’t crossed our minds. Do you want us to call him so you can talk for a bit?”
“No thank you, I don’t want him to worry.” My daughter fidgeted with her claws in shame. She didn’t want Odin to see her hurt. The moment she’s okay, I’m planning a date for her and Odin. With chaperones of course. “Are the doctors here nice?” Yalga asked nervously.
“Of course they are, Princess. Just answer honestly and they’ll help you get better.”
They’ll help you get better… I hope.
[Memory Transcript Time Skip: 60 Minutes]
“So the spray will help heal and clean the burn so it doesn’t get sick?” Yalga asked curiously.
“That’s right,” Dr. Brown stated. “Soon we’ll give you a small shot to help protect against tetanus. It’s a very dangerous condition that can happen when you get a cut or burn. But you’re being very brave, I’ll see if we can get you a treat later. That is, if your parents are okay with it.”
“gasp Can I daddy?! Pleeeeeeease, I’ve been soooo good.”
I smiled brightly, “Of course you can.”
Dr. Brown was a huge blessing. The guy had been working with kids for a while and was great with Yalga. He was really good at relaxing her and explaining to her what was going on. He was honest and genuine. Salisek really liked him too, and even asked some questions herself. I also remembered him during my reckless years. He recognized me too.
“You’re daddy was quite the troublemaker back in his day.”
“Really?”
“Yup, when he was small he proudly came to me with a broken wrist.”
“Why would he be proud of that?”
“He got it trying to impress his crush.”
Seven-year-old me told you that in confidence.
I awkwardly looked at Salisek, but all she could do was stare and slowly smile while turning to my dad for more information.
“Do you happen to know the full story, dad?” Salisek teased.
“Well daughter, Carlos had a small crush on this girl named Jessica in the second grade and he tried to impress her by jumping off the swing set. He succeeded and flung himself so far into the air that when he landed on his wrist he needed a cast for months.”
“H-Hey! You laugh but it worked. She sat next to me at lunch and gave me her lunchables, that’s like… the pinnacle of love in second grade.”
I earned a laugh from everyone in the room, which almost made me forget that it was at my expense.
“Um, what is a lunchable?” Dr. Triva asked. She was a Zurulian working with Dr. Brown, trying to work with and understand the Arxur biology. While she was important in treating Yalga’s burn with her experience with Harchen Exterminators she would be even more important in trying to understand her condition as a whole. Zurulians have the best medical understanding compared to… pretty much everyone.
“It’s a children’s meal kit for both vegan and non-vegan foods, it’s popular for kids in school lunches.” Dr. Brown took his eyes off his colleague and gave me a sly look. “But let’s be honest, there was never any real meat in those things.”
Yalga’s interests also peaked. “Were they tasty?”
“Back in my day they were the best part of school. They were also a status symbol. Having the best lunchables meant you were the coolest kid.”
“What was the best one, Daddy?”
“Pizza.”
Of course it was pizza. It’s always pizza.
Pizza is God’s gift to the world.
Dr. Triva grabbed the syringe for the shot while Dr. Brown prepped the area. The sight of the needle made Yalga nervous.
“D-Daddy, do we have to…”
“Hey Princess, look at this.”
Yalga took her gaze off the needle and onto my phone where I showed her my favorite distraction.
[Behold Distraction]
“What is that?” Yalga asked. “I like the sounds.”
The legend Zach Choi, his legacy continued by his descendants, loved making short videos of him just cooking. This one was one of the rare ones that didn’t feature meat. Yalga was fully entranced into the process that she didn’t even react to the needle or the bandaid.
“Good job my beautiful pup!” Salisek cheered.
“Yeah… in a minute, mom.”
Dr. Brown chuckled, “I think I should start using those for nervous patients, right Dr. Triva?”
“Yeah… in a minute, Dr. Brown.”
I took my phone away before everyone forgot why they were here and we were ready to proceed. The doctors wanted to really get a look at Yalga and her condition. On the promise of peanut butter cookies and meat lovers pizza Yalga bravely went through all the X-Ray’s, bloodwork, medical history, and any other examinations they needed.
It took a while and she was starting to get frustrated with all the tests, but she persisted, and soon it was over. They allowed us to stay the night to monitor the burn area in case complications arose. So we all stayed in the hospital room, enjoying our time together as if it was a little adventure.
“Mommy look, the bed moves!”
“Pup, please don’t break it.”
Yalga went crazy when she saw how many buttons the hospital bed had, and needless to say, she was enjoying it. She kept Dad occupied with all her questions both about the hospital and about anything else her mind could think of. She was happy to be done with the tests.
“Grandpa, do you think they’ll let me see my bone pictures later?”
“Sure, but they need someone who is trained to look at them first and show them to the doctors.”
“There’s someone who knows how to look at pictures of bones?”
“Yup, they can see things we can because they’re bone smart. Do you wanna be a doctor when you grow up?”
“I dunno. Maybe I can be a doctor for bones, a bone doctor!”
It was nice seeing her happy, but Salisek and I were still worried about what they would find. What would it take to heal Yalga? Could they do it? I think so, but how long will it take? I don’t care about the financial cost, I care about the physical and mental toll it would take on Yalga. But would we have a choice?
I looked to my fiance who was rapidly tapping her foot onto the ground, impatiently waiting for the doctor to come back in and give us the news on Yalga’s condition.
“It can’t be that bad right?” she whispered. “With aid from the Zurualians they must have a way to easily fix Yalga’s condition. So what’s taking them so long?”
“They’re probably just double checking some things. I’m sure it’s nothing.” I could tell she was still stressed, so I held her hand and kissed her cheek. “Our daughter will be fine.”
Salisek tried to keep herself from crying for Yalga’s sake, but had the doctors not finally arrived she might’ve broken.
“Carlos, Salisek? You’re the parents correct?” Dr. Trivia asked. “I’ll just need to see you both very quickly to discuss some things.”
Finally ready for some answers we quickly got up, kissed our baby goodbye for now, and followed the Zurulian to a small room with Dr. Brown.
“Mr. Rodriguez and Mrs., do you prefer to be called Salisek or are you fine with adopting Mrs. Rodriguez?” The doctor politely asked.
“I’m fine with either, but I would like to get used to Mrs. Rodriguez.” I could feel her hand strengthen her grip in mine.
“Wonderful,” Dr. Brown took out a small folder that showed some of Yalga’s X-Rays, notes, and documents. “First things first, your daughter's burns should heal very soon.”
“Courtesy of Zurulian medicine and Harchen Exterminator Accidents.”
“Yes, thank you Dr. Triva. But of course this is not the only information you wanted to know about. The condition of your daughter is concerning. Not only because of the condition of her injuries, but also her condition that allows her body to grow at an exaggerated rate.”
Dr. Triva put the X-Ray slides on a projector for us to see. Seeing Yalga’s bones and how badly they were broken made my stomach turn, and my heart sink. I could hear Salisek’s gasp from how shocked she was.
It looked like a child had rearranged the right side of her body like a poorly constructed jigsaw puzzle. What made things worse was that the other side of her body looked nearly untouched meaning we could see all the damage her sperm donor did. I know how it felt to have broken a few bones as a kid. Her life would’ve been torture for me. I have know idea how she could live like that.
Why didn’t I take her here the moment we got home? How long has she been suffering like this?
“As you can see the limbs that didn’t grow as much were the ones that were injured the most. Trauma can be a factor in how limbs develop,” Dr. Triva explained. “You can see here how the bones didn’t heal correctly. Upon questioning your daughter it’s no question her back holds the most problems, but looking at her arms and legs it’s possible they’re also providing an incredible amount of discomfort and pain.”
Salisek wrapped her tail around my leg nervously. “So, what does this mean?”
“It means,” Dr. Brown continued. “That before we even think about her back we should address what’s going on in the rest of her body. If you look at her pelvic bone you can see it isn’t straight due to her walking on uneven legs for lord knows how long. So we think it would be best to first start realigning the bones as well as doing the appropriate extensions. My only concern is that her accelerated growth may cause complications, so she’ll need to visit here frequently.”
My fiance’s grip tightened as she looked deeper into the X-Rays, “I see. How long will it take for her to recover?”
“Several months, due to the severity of it. We can do the arms and legs separately, but that would be up to you. There’s a possibility it could take longer. We just can’t be certain with her growth, but we’ll have experts working round the clock on her case.”
“I-I see. But you can help her right?”
“We will do all within our power to make sure your daughter is healthy and lives a pain free life.
“Thank you… could you give us a moment. We would like to let our daughter know about it before we make arrangements.”
“Of course. Please let us know when you’re ready.”
We politely walked out of the room and turned around the corner away from where Yalga was.
“Honey?” I asked. “Is everything okay?”
I almost fell over when she pulled me in for a hug. I could barely hear her through her bleats and cry’s. “Look at what that monster did to her.”
First Previous

Song Lyrics I connect to
I listen to a LOT of music, so I’ll just go with some I really connect to
All the lyrics from Fire Drill by Melanie Martinez but I’ll pick a few
“Crying inside cause nothing I say ever comes out right” -Fire Drill
“I’ve never fit into any category Always deemed an outcast” -Fire Drill
“I’m bad at public speaking But I’m speaking now so hear me out I personally believe that everyone is fully capable of more than what they’re doing All of the bullying All of the screwing around with people they don’t really know” -Fire Drill
“I am not apart of anything that is hateful Love is seeping out my pores, I don’t feel anger anymore, even for people who hurt and betray me” -Fire Drill
“I’m just another teenage tragedy And life keeps draining my batteries” -Teenage Tragedy- Rory Webley
“You don’t want to know me, I will just let you down” -Castles Crumbling- Taylor Swift
“Now they’re screaming that they hate me Never wanted you to hate me” -Castles Crumbling
“I’ve got a smile cut into my cheeks I hide things when I speak Looks like I mean it I guess I’m a joker My hairs burnt from the bleach I hope you like what you see Need you like me I guess I’m the joker Why so serious?” -Joker, Rory Webley
“The thoughts in my brain, I’m going insane I’m somebody Arkham Asylum could never contain” -Joker
“Seems kind of dumb to worry bout good grades when this generation’s dealing with its own black plague”—Everybody Dies, Rory Webley
“It’s kinda sad to watch your superheroes fall from grace”- Everybody Dies- Rory Webley
“Feels like I’m dead before I’m even in the casket” -Everybody Dies
“Telling me that the end’s getting closer While I’m sitting on my phone scrolling TikTok turning my brain into a toaster” -Everybody Dies
“Your heart’s too big for your body That’s why it won’t fit inside You pore it out where everyone can see” -Crybaby, Melanie Martinez
“So what if I’m crazy, all the best people are”—Mad Hatter, Melanie Martinez
“You and I’ll be safe and sound” -Taylor Swift, Safe and Sound
“Why do I always spill? Feel it coming out my throat Guess I better wash my mouth out with soap” -Soap, Melanie Martinez
“Why’d I put my heart on every cursive letter?” -Melanie Martinez, Pity Party
“Why not me?” -Washing Machine Heart, Mitski
“What was I made for?” -What was I made for- Billie Eilish
“Loving you was lethal, guess that makes me evil” -EVIL, Melanie Martinez
“If you bite my hand again I will never feed you” -Melanie Martinez, EVIL
“I like shiny things but I’d marry you with paper rings You’re the one I want And I hate accidents Except when we went from friends to this”-Paper Rings, Taylor Swift
“I see things that nobody else sees”- Dollhouse, Melanie Martinez
“I’ll try not to starve myself Just because you’re mad at me” -Tv- Billie Eilish
“It’s you that I lie with As the atom bomb locks in”—As The World Caves In- Matt Maltese
“I’m not cool and I’m not smart and I can’t even parallel park 🤪” -brutal- Olivia Rodrigo
“Who is in control?” -Control, Halsey
“Go on and step on me” -Step On Me- The Cardigans
“You’re perfectly imperfect, You’re hurting but you’re worth it You don’t know why I would waste my time But I’m falling and I mean it I want you like I need it There’s nothing you could try to change my mind Cause I’m In Love With You” -Perfectly Imperfect, Declan J Donavan
“Your body is imperfectly imperfect Everyone wants what the other one’s working” -Orange Juice, Melanie Martinez
“My heart just burst like the glass balloon I let it fly too high and it shattered to soon” -MARINA, Hermit The Frog
“I’ve been chosen last since the kindergarten” -Chosen Last, Sara Kays
“I’m so sick of myself” -jealousy jealousy- Olivia Rodrigo
“The world will feel the fire and finally know” -The World Will Know- Newsies
“Just an appendage live to attend him so that he never lifts a finger” -labour- Paris Paloma
“Im more than my body” -Body, Jordan Suaste

I know I'm not wrong objectively but Id like some input on what I should have done differently
I've been talking to this guy for about 3 weeks. Tonight was the second time we had ever met up though.
We've sexted a bit but I've never sent any nudes. Just a gym selfie that I cropped to just my ass. He's sent me dick pictures. And I've been more than happy to reply. I'm a good writer. And I can tell the story over the phone. And idk I feel as if the entire time, I was so vocal about needing to feel safe and comfortable. Most of the fantasies revolved around him taking control and teaching me slowly. He said he wanted something long term too
He actually got mad that I couldn't hang out with him sooner than tonight. So instead of the weekend like I would have preferred. I went to his place after work
And I wanted to have sex with him, I did. But he got very upset when I couldn't leave work early like I thought I could. And when I finally made it, I thought he'd lean down for a kiss. Or ask me about what was obviously a long day or idk just talk to me.
I don't even know this guy's last name.
But instead, his giant dog jumped on me. Which was lovely but his whole house smelled like dog, there was nothing but a couch, tv, and car parts. He wanted to get down to it right away. No kiss, no hug, just me waddling in
And I kept waiting to feel comfortable. I had a mocktail drink, did those anxiety breaths in the bathroom, I even imagined how much it would make another imaginary person jealous if I just slept with them. That doesn't make sense but I was despatately trying to turn myself on. But it literally never happened
And I'm dissapointed too. I woke up at 5am to shave. Why? Because I was so exhausted last night that I couldn't even shower. I bought this dress specifically for tonight. Its black and lacy but tasteful enough to wear to work. I also bought matching underwear specifically for tonight
And frankly, I am super horny. I haven't had sex in over a year. I haven't had a matching set of underwear on in over a year. And I've been horny with him but tonight...I just couldn't.
I kept fishing for any kind of conversation but he told me I was avoiding actually sleeping with him. I told him it was the opposite. That I really really wanted too but I'm asking for some kind of reassurance that the guy who actually wants to fuck me actually likes me. I'm trying to turn myself on with the idea of him, what kind of man he was, but I couldn't get anything out of him.
I also hadn't eaten today because work was quite busy. I had 4 slices of bacon from a company cafeteria at 8am. So I asked if he'd like to get something to eat since it was 6. He said that he'd already had a snack.
Maybe this is unfair but that also bothered me. He knew I was coming over and that I was working hard enough to stay longer than expected and he didn't even think about dinner.
So here I am, starving and sweaty from a long day, and trying to get in the mood. But the entire time I was thinking about how I was forcing the mood for him and he wasn't doing anything to make me feel comfortable. Eventually he relented and I ordered a $9 sushi roll.
Or maybe he was right. Maybe I should have just did what I said I'd do. And I tried to tell him that I don't want to do this out of consolidation.
But after 2 hours he said he was "over it" and started working on his laptop. He said that I was all talk and we've been talking for over a month. And that maybe true but this is the second time we've been in the same room and that room smelled like his dog. Heck, I don't even know if I was worth of the bedroom or was his empty living room it.
Part of me wanted to say, all you had to do was kiss me. Anywhere. Put your arm around my waist. Say I looked nice. I wish that there was a bedroom and that he'd gotten a rose or something.
Tbh, I don't even know if he's attracted to me. For all I know, I'm the first person taking the bait and he's willing to sleep with anyone regardless of he's attracted to them
Was I wrong for now things went down? Should I have sexted him if I wasn't planning on going through with it? Was it fair of me to say I wanted too but could?
And the reason why I haven't had sex in over a year? Because the guy I dated before told me I'm not lovable and listed all the reasons why. And I know for fact that's not true but I never want to feel like that ever again. I don't have to be in love but at minimum, I don't want to sleep with someone who can look me in the eye and be cruel. And I did so much just to make it out there to his place and he didn't even want to get dinner till after sex, if dinner at all.
But am I just taking out all my baggage on this guy?

This is the first time I have written something of this length, and is more of an exercise in self-therapy than anything else. Disclaimer: This story contains conversations about child abuse. Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoy it.
Nathan’s number appeared on my phone screen. I debated whether or not to answer it. We hadn’t been on speaking terms for a while, and while we did keep in touch sporadically, it was usually because of important family issues. I didn’t know of anything happening with mom or dad, nor with Talia or Rio, so I let it go to voicemail. I could always call him back later. I placed the phone back in my pocket, and returned to cleaning my camera. The phone buzzed again. A text message came through. I read the preview line from the home screen. “The city declared eminent domain on the house” I unlocked my phone, read the full text message, and dialed my brother.
I wasn't able to get any closer to the house than a few blocks. Most of the area was blocked off with chain link fencing and construction equipment in preparation for the demolition that was supposed to take place within the coming days. The barriers didn’t prevent people from walking in to the neighborhood, but it hindered scrappers from coming in and stripping the houses of copper wiring and plumbing.
I grabbed my camera bag out of the trunk of my car along with my tripod. I shouldered it and hooked the tripod to my bag. I pulled my water bottle out of the center console and shut the door. I stood next to my car surveying the neighborhood. 12 city blocks of old single family homes comprised the neighborhood where I grew up. Some of the houses had been empty for months, others for years. There was an eerie silence that permeated the still air. I could not hear the familiar sounds of people, pets, or cars. I locked the car and put my keys in my pocket. I patted my jacket down to ensure I had what I needed. After a quick check, I started my walk.
The sidewalk of the old neighborhood streets still bore the familiar cracks and grind marks from years of buckling and remedy. Leaves dropped by the trees still lay scattered all along the pathways and sidewalk. Korina’s house was the first house I encountered as I made my way through a gap in the fence. The yard was overgrown with tall grass and thistle. I could see the faded blue paint of the old house contrasting the green and browns of the lawn. The chain link fence that marked off the corner property was nearly invisible through the thick brush. As I continued walking west towards 110th, I started to feel something was off. The streets seemed wider than I remembered. It took me longer than I’d like to admit, but eventually I realized what was different. There were no cars.
The streets here typically had cars lined bumper to bumper in any spot available, and were visible from block to block. The absence of all these vehicles made me realize just how deserted the neighborhood really was. House after house, yard after yard, the telltale signs of desertion reinforced what I could see from the moment I passed the construction fence: This was no longer my neighborhood. There were no signs of life, and no one I could expect to find still here. Abandonment was the new normal here. I continued on, glancing at houses and recalling memories of summer bike rides, and daily walks with dogs I used to have. I remembered walks home from school, and chasing after ice cream trucks when they passed our houses. I smiled a bit as I remembered more and more of my years spent here. I don’t quite know just why I was smiling. There were plenty of bad memories here too. Fights, yelling, being beat up, being robbed. I could remember failed friendships, lost loves, and bitter feelings of failures too.
Still, I felt a certain amount of nostalgia despite the weight of these negative feelings. I almost wanted to experience everything again, although I wasn't sure why I was feeling this way. Concrete, asphalt, billboards and liquor stores were the normal vistas of everyday life. Occasionally, after a good rainstorm, the grey haze of smog would lift, and the mountains would be visible to the north. At least, they would be visible until mid-morning when the exhaust from a million cars covered them behind a veil of pollution.
It wasn’t until the first time I travelled out of the city that I realized there was more to see. Traveling up the coast north along the Pacific Coast Highway introduced me to scenes of deep blue ocean water spanning the width of my vision. Driving up Highway 3 introduced me to the permeating scent of Pine and Fir trees. The two-lane stretch of highway from Portland to Tillamook introduced me to lush green forests that I had only ever read about. When I came home to the same old dirty, dusty concrete and boiling summer asphalt, I had made up my mind. I would do everything it took to leave this place. I would not spend another day longer than was necessary living in cramped quarters and fighting for parking space.
I arrived to the house, and paused at the gate. The house sat in contrast of what the rest of the neighborhood looked like. Instead of overgrown grass and tall weeds all over the place, the landscaping showed signs of relatively recent work. The guava tree in the front lawn still had some fruit ready to be picked, and the avocado tree on the other side of the pathway was still weighed down by its own fruit. Flowers still bloomed in the raised bed in front of the house. My brother had clearly tried to keep up on things until the last possible moment. The house, too, looked better than what I expected after walking up 4 blocks and seeing nothing but dilapidated houses and unkempt yards. I opened the gate and walked up to the small porch. The metal gate that enclosed it was gone having been removed by my brother when he took over the property. It looked nice to see it open instead of the cage it once felt like.
I turned the knob on the door, but it didn't give. Ever a creature of habit, my brother had locked the door when he left. Of course, he did. I sighed and prepared to find another way in when I remembered my parents hiding a spare key. I wasn’t sure if it would still be there, but after running my hands along the back side of the gutter downspout, I was rewarded for my efforts. I unlocked the front door and stepped into the front living room, the sounds of my footsteps and the closing door echoing in the empty space. The room felt both larger and smaller than I remembered it. I suppose it was lack of furniture that made it feel larger, but it still felt smaller than I remember. The result of growing taller throughout the years I suppose. I slowly walked along the slate tile floor towards the central hallway that connected the front of the house to the back bedrooms. I wasn't entirely sure that just because the front door was locked, that there wasn't some squatter looking for a little temporary shelter within the back rooms. I carefully and silently crept step by step towards what used to be the bedroom shared by my sister and me. I stuck my head in and gave the room a cursory glance. It was empty, thankfully. I moved back into the hallway and peered into the bedroom across the hall. This is where both of my brothers had shared a room. It too, was empty save for a few boxes holding hardware and doorknobs from the closet doors of the bedroom. I walked back towards the back of the house where my parent's bedroom was. The walls in the hallway bore the dusty signs where picture once hung. The bedroom door was open. I stepped inside, and looked around. The old avocado paint that my mom had picked out years ago still adorned the walls. Walking further towards the addition that was the small room my grandma and grandpa lived in showed that there was no one here. I breathed a sigh of relief as I set my bag down and set up my tripod. I reached into my bag a pulled out an envelope of old photos. These were old snapshots that we had all taken at some point in time in the house. There were pictures of all of us sitting at the dining room table playing a game of Monopoly. There was a picture of my brother and sister sitting on a couch in the front living room. There was a picture of me hanging on the bars of the front porch. I looked through them all and held them in place in front of me as if I were holding a window to the past.
Each picture made the lump in my throat grow as I started to struggle to control my emotions. There was history here, and soon it would all be gone. This is the place where my parents had raised four kids. They had taken care of my grandparents in their twilight years here. My Aunt and my grandmother had both died in this house. Birthdays, graduation parties, and anniversaries had been celebrated here. The echoes of life had reverberated within the walls of this place. Now, the house sat silent. It would never again know happy screams of kids having a water-balloon war out in the front yard, nor would it hear the cries of anguish as the matriarch of the family passed away surrounded by her family. What once was a home full of life was now just an empty house made of drywall and paint. I sat there for a moment contemplating just how much family history was actually made here. As I thought hard about my siblings and my parents, I felt pained at the thought of our strained relationships. We had all scattered once we had the opportunity to be free of each other. My oldest brother had married and moved away as soon as possible. My sister now lived in northern California. My parents too had moved away. I was now living in Utah. Only my older brother had remained behind. The lump grew larger in my throat as tears welled up in my eyes. I held back sobs of anger and pain. Why was I hurting? Hadn’t I dealt with these issues already? I walked back to my old bedroom and sat down under the window. I pulled my head down into my knees and cried. I could hear yelling and screaming in my head. Shouting matches between siblings and parents, brothers and sister, rattled inside my brain, making the pain grow. I sat there and cried. I hadn’t cried like this in a long time. Eventually I ran out of tears and tired gasps of sorrow and regret washed over me as a blanket of drowsiness enveloped me. I leaned my head back and fell asleep.
I woke up to the sound of footsteps. It took me a moment to realize what I was hearing and hurriedly stood up. Had someone followed me? I knew the police were patrolling the area sporadically. Had they seen me enter the house? I knew there would be a possibility of getting a trespassing citation, but I figured I could either talk my way out of it seeing as to how I was a former resident, or I could probably fight the citation in court if the judge knew why I was there in the first place. Ultimately, passing through the gate had been a calculated risk that I was willing to take for the sake of my art. I got up from my corner of the room and moved towards the door. If there was someone in the house, I needed to know. I didn’t want my gear to stolen, and if there was a cop in the house, I wanted to ensure I didn’t get shot.
I was greeted by the sight of a startled chubby boy standing on the other side of the door. His round cherubic face was crowned by a head of short curly hair. His hazel green eyes stared widely back at me. He clearly didn’t expect someone to be here in the house. His body recoiled in fear as he cowered back towards the hallway. “Wait, what are you doing here?” I asked as non-threateningly as I could. The boy muttered something that I couldn’t quite make out. “What did you say? I couldn’t hear you” I replied. “Are you here to rob us?” he timidly responded. “Rob you? What are you talking about?” I asked as confusion set in. “What are you doing here?” It was his turn to be confused. “Uh…I….live here?” he replied. “What do you mean you live here? No one lives-“I stopped midsentence. I hadn’t noticed in my initial shock but the room wasn’t the same. A familiar blue couch caught the corner of my eye. In front of that was an old console TV with a partially broken antenna hanging on the wall behind it. I walked further in to the living room to notice wood paneling on the walls. A large mirror hung on the wall to my left. Familiar yellow lamps sat on round drop-leaf tables on either side of the couch. A large hutch sat in one corner, a collection of letters and bills, mail advertisements, and a phone book covered scattered over it. “What just happened?” I asked out loud to no one in particular. I was thoroughly mystified by what my eyes were seeing. I had walked into the house from the front door and had stepped into an empty white room with slate floor tiles, but somehow now found myself in a furnished room with brown carpet that was all so familiar to me, yet was nothing but a distant faded memory. I turned to look at the boy still startled by the intrusion of a strange man looking wildly around the room in total shock.
“You can take what you want, just please let me go. I don’t want problems.” He stated his voice still shrill with anxiety. I blinked a few times as I tried to process just what the heck was going on. I gathered my thoughts as best I could and tried to reassure him. “Kid, I’m not here to rob anyone. I was just-“I shook my head “Where the hell am I? Am I having a dream?” I asked myself. “I must be dreaming. I’m just tired and still sleeping. This is all a dream. Yeah, that’s it.” I needed to sit down. Being back in the old house must have overtaxed my senses, I told myself. I’d having a dream about an old memory. I walked over to the chair next to the couch and sat down. I sunk into it and rested my head back towards the wall.
The boy kept his distance, but sensed I wasn’t there to hurt him. He looked me over with anxious curiosity. He stood at the far end of the couch, examining me while he played out scenarios in his head in preparation for a quick exit. “Why are you in my house?” he asked me. “Dude, this is all just a dream I’m having. I’m not really here.” He reached over to the couch and picked up a pillow. He reared his arm and threw it at me. It landed in my lap. “I don’t know, man. You sure seem to be here.” He said to me. I opened my eyes, startled. I looked down at the pillow he tossed and examined it. I ran my hand over the fabric and felt its texture. I remember this pillow. This was the pillow I would roll under my head as I lay on the couch and watched TV as a kid. A sudden realization hit me as I looked around the room with fresh eyes. No longer was I blinded by the fog of confusion. I knew exactly where I was.
I was home.
I looked at the boy still standing at the edge of the couch. I looked him over and realized who he actually was. I stared in disbelief as I smiled and tried to put him at ease. “It’s ok Johnny. I’m not here to hurt you. No one is going to hurt you. Please, sit down” I told him. I motioned to his end of the couch. “Who are you, and why are you here?” he asked me.
“This will be hard to believe, but I’m you” I said with an incredulous tone, “I’m not sure how I ended up here, but I’m here.” He looked at me as I had grown a second head. “That doesn’t make any sense. How could you be me? Did we invent time travel? Oh! Are we secret government agents with the CIA?”
I chuckled. “Wait, wait, wait. Let’s start at the beginning. I’m you at 38 years old. You’re…what, 11… 12 years old? It makes sense. I fell asleep under the window in my- our old bedroom. I didn’t come here on purpose or in a machine. And no, I’m not a government agent.” His face contorted to display understanding, disappointment and finally suspicion. His eyes narrowed as he leaned in towards me. “How do I know you’re really me?” he asked. I thought about it for a moment. How could I prove to him that I was who I said I was? A few seconds of silence settled between us. I stroked my chin, thinking of a solution.
“I have a better idea. Ask me questions that only you know the answers to.” “Okay” he responded. He glanced around the room trying to come up with something. His eyes fixated on the Nintendo sitting under the TV cabinet. “What game do me and Nathan have a map of?” I looked over at the NES. I hadn’t thought about this for years, but I knew instantly what he was asking. “YOU don’t have anything. Nathan is the one that made the map for Section Z” His jaw dropped. He tried to trick me, but his plan failed. He knew well and good that Nathan never let him play. It was always ‘I’ll let you play when I die’ or, ‘you can play when I’m done’. The problem was that he never followed through. Usually by the time Nathan was done, the NES was overheated, and the game would no longer load until it cooled down. By that point, it was time for bed.
“How do you know that?” he asked in astonishment. “I know these things because I’m you. Just like I know that you wear t-shirts to the pool because you’re embarrassed by what others will think of your body. I know that you used to think that people that die off in movies were prisoners that were set to be executed from death row, so they used them for making movies. I know all about you because I’m you”
Johnny sat on the end of the couch in bewilderment, his mouth slightly agape. He had never told anyone any of this. He didn’t have any close friends to talk to about such things, and those friends he did have were more acquaintances than friends. There was only one way he could possibly know these things. He was talking to his future self.
I could see Johnny’s mind completely explode. There lay endless possibility and the answers to a million questions he could ask about his own future. He started to ask a question, only to stop, close his mouth, and try asking another. I knew if he kept this up he would have a stroke or something. “Dude, calm yourself. Let’s talk this out rationally, otherwise you’ll end up stroking out or something.” I told him. He took a deep breath and I could hear him muttering quietly. I knew he was trying to form a coherent sentence before he actually spoke it. I did it all the time. “Ok, first of all, are we rich?” he asked with tempered expectation. I chuckled and grinned back at him. “No, not at all. If I was rich, would I be dressed like this?” I replied as I motioned to my beat up brown Vans and worn out jeans and T-shirt. “We-, I – make enough to get by. I’m not poor, but I earn enough to pay the bills.” His face grew a smirk as he commented “Yeah, I figured. What do I do for work? I mean, what do you do for work?” I thought about it for a second. I wondered how much information I should divulge to a younger me. I still didn’t think this whole situation was really happening, but if it was, I probably should proceed with caution. “Well, it’s complicated. I do a little bit of everything. You know how you’re constantly taking things apart? Let’s just say that it’s good to put them back together in order to keep them working. Take good notes on paper if you need to, and make sure you have a clean work area so you can keep track of all the parts.” He gave me a sheepish look. He knew exactly what I was talking about. I had spent countless hours sneaking dad’s tools to my room so I could figure out how something was built and try to figure out how it worked. I had gotten myself into some pretty bad trouble with dad over a drill, his timing light, and other stuff I had taken from his room. His belt had become quite familiar with my butt cheeks.
I gave him a knowing smile. “What else do you want to know?” He thought about it for a second. “Do we have a girlfriend?” I laughed, probably a little more than I should have because his face contorted into a sour frown. “You don’t need to be a jerk about it” he scowled. I continued to chuckle. “Yeah we have a girlfriend. We have more than a girlfriend” I could tell he was irritated with my vague indirect answers. I knew what he was asking. I remember the crush I had on my neighbor across the street. We had been friends since kindergarten, and had been classmates for 1st, 2nd, and 4th grades. We got along really well, and I knew from around 12 or 13 that I wanted to be her boyfriend. Unfortunately, things never progressed beyond the ‘just friends’ stage of things. It wasn’t from lack of effort on my part. We had just grown up together most of our lives that she didn’t see me as anything more than a brother and friend. “Dude, look. You just started to go through changes and you are starting to notice girls, but that doesn’t mean that you need to love every girl that shows you a little kindness or subtle interest. You need to slow down and let things happen naturally. You can’t force a relationship with someone.” Johnny pondered these words for a moment. I sat back and put my feet up on the coffee table. I looked around the room some more while I waited for another question. There was so much I had forgotten, but being back here had unlocked more and more memories that continued to wash over me. I was trying to hold on to my cool as not all those churned up recollections were pleasant. I stood up and walked over to the front door to peer outside the small central window embedded into the center of it. I could see the old neighborhood as I remembered it all those years ago. The lot across the street that served as a parking area for those that worked at the wheel works at the end of the block was empty of cars. I furrowed my brow as I thought for a moment. An empty lot meant it was afterhours or the weekend.
The gears in my own head started turning. “Wait, where is everyone?” I asked Johnny. Johnny turned to look at me still processing my last response. “Uh..oh, Mom and dad are out of town. They took a trip east this time. I think Rio said they are in Arizona right now. Rio and Nathan went out to get some food and to rent some movies from Video Showcase. Knowing them they’ll eat out first. Talia is staying over at Tia Rosie’s place today with her friends.” I grunted at his response. My mind was wandering as he mentioned Talia and Tia Rosie.
A sudden sharp pain pieced my heart. The pain of a thousand memories now unsealed spilled out from the box I had locked them away in. Tears welled in the corners of my eyes as I turned back to look at Johnny. He felt it too. He stared at the floor with an intensity that made me think it would burst into flames at any moment. I walked back over to him and sat next to him. He didn’t move. I placed my hand on his shoulder, and he threw himself into me. I could feel the tears dripping onto me as he sobbed intensely. “Hey man, its ok. It’s going to be ok.” I said as my own tears started to flow uncontrollably. I pulled him close and draped my other arm around him.
I knew the pain he was feeling. It was such a heavy burden, and I knew there was no one he felt he could talk to. I remembered it all so vividly. We sat there for what seemed to be an eternity. When we finally stopped sobbing, and our noses ran dry, we tried to breathe our way through to calmness. I got up and knelt in front of him. “Johnny, listen to me and remember what it is that I’m about to say to you. You are stronger than you think. You are stronger than you believe. NO ONE should ever have to go through this. Just because it happened to Talia, doesn’t mean you have to put up with it any longer. I know you didn’t think it was wrong, but I’m telling you that what she is doing to you is wrong. Talking to mom and dad isn’t going to make them hate you. You are not doing this to her, she is doing it to you. I’m not making excuses for her, but she is also more damaged than anyone realizes, and she is also dealing with the same level of pain you are. Remember that we do unto others what has been done to us. That doesn’t mean we need to continue the cycle of abuse” The lump in my throat grew immense at my own statement. I swallowed it as best I could and continued “You are going to deal with this pain a little bit at a time, and you’ll slowly get over this. It’s like a broken bone. When it happens, you don’t realize how bad the pain is until the adrenaline wears off, but then the immense pain is there. Just remember that this will pass. Just like a broken bone, you will heal over time, and one day, you will realize that the pain is gone and the bone is no longer broken. You’ll remember the pain, but it won’t hurt anymore.”
Johnny sat there in stunned silence. I knew he didn’t have anyone to help him through this. He couldn’t talk to Rio or Nathan about what was going on. Mom and Dad were constantly working to keep the family fed and sheltered and while they provided materially for their kids, emotional help was less available. Perhaps it was due to their energies being divided into 4 kids, a mortgage and multiple jobs, or perhaps it was also the culture of not talking about problems. Either way, they needed to know what was happening. They wouldn’t be able to fix it otherwise. “They’re going to be mad at me” he finally said after a few moments of silence. “No they won’t be. They love us all. I know you’re not used to hearing it, but they do love you. Everything they do is because of their love for us. This isn’t your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong. Telling them isn’t going to cause them to be angry.” I thought for a moment to find a good analogy. “You love Odie and Lady, right?” He nodded in agreement. “Ok, how would you feel if you knew someone you trusted was coming to the house and beating up our dogs when we weren’t around?” He thought about it for a second before his face changed to anger. “I’d want to kill them!” “Yes, but would you also feel sad that you weren’t there to try to protect them?” I reasoned. His face changed again. He understood what I was saying. Mom and Dad would be angry, but not necessarily at him. They would also feel a great sadness knowing that someone was hurting their child.
I smiled at him. He understood. I nodded. “Dude…You’re going to come to understand that life is not what you think it will be. Life is messy and can change in an instant. The plans you make today may not make it to next week. A lifelong goal can be derailed because of something out of your control. Mom and dad have spent their life protecting us with the goal of keeping us safe, but circumstances out of their control have affected their kids, and now we- you all have to deal with the fallout. Just remember that you are not the culprit. Yes, mom and dad will be hurt and angry, but not at you. Trust them. They don’t do things to hurt us” Johnny hugged me. I- He didn’t have many people he could trust and open up to. He liked to talk a lot about everything going on in his life, no matter how trivial. Everything, except this. This was a shameful topic, and he didn’t feel like anyone would understand why he didn’t go to an adult sooner. The problem was simple. He simply didn’t understand that it was wrong. Now that he had an adult that he could talk to, himself no less, he wanted to lift this burden off his shoulders. He was happy to have found someone and he hugged me tightly. I hugged him back just at tightly. It wasn’t every day that I could meet my younger self and help to comfort them. “Thank you” he said to me.
The world darkened, and everything faded to black.
I lifted my head out of my knees and looked around. I was sitting under the window in my old bedroom again. Had I fallen asleep? I pulled my phone out of my pocket and checked the time. I was emotionally drained and incredibly tired. I hadn’t had sleep like that in years. I got to my feet and looked around the room briefly before walking out to mom and dad’s old room. I grabbed my camera and slowly walked the house, snapping picture after picture. The only sound to be heard was the sound of the camera shutter and my soft footsteps. I thought about my dream as I took pictures.
Upon entering my room, a random memory hit me.
The stash.
I was pretty sure I had taken the hidden box when I moved out all those years ago, but since I was here, I should double check. Heading into the closet, I pushed the panel that led to the attic space out of the way and peered in. I couldn’t see anything, so I reached up there to feel around. The box was indeed gone. I felt around for a few more seconds and was surprised to feel what felt like a thick envelope. I didn’t remember leaving anything up there, but after pulling it down and giving it a cursory glance, I figured it was an old envelope of lost love letters. It wasn’t until I blew off the thick layer of dust that I realized what I was holding. It was a letter. Not just any letter. It was addressed to me.
Under the now semi-cleared layer of dust were the words “To be opened by future me”. I looked at it for a few moments before opening it. I couldn’t remember making this at all, much less storing it up in my secret hiding spot. If ever I hid something, it was in the stash box. My hands shook a bit as I started to open the envelope and pulled out the yellowed pages inside. I started reading.
"Dear Future John. I have spent the last few years remembering a dream I had when I was younger. Life was…difficult at that time, and I spent a lot of time escaping my reality by reading a lot of books and watching a lot of TV. On the off-chance that what I think is a dream really happened. I wanted to write some things down in an effort to give you my thanks. I merely consider myself a conveyer of thanks, although I will pile on my own thanks to you for your words of encouragement. I remember finding a stranger in the house one day while I was home alone. I was afraid he was there to hurt me at first, but after a few moments, I came to realize I was meeting myself. Well, I was meeting me, but from the future. I think he said he was in his 40’s, but I couldn’t tell you with any certainty. Either way, we talked. We talked about life, and what the future held in store for us…
Mostly though, we talked about the abuse. Well, Talked is being generous. We cried, and then we talked. I don’t remember exactly what he told me, but I remember how he made me feel. He made me feel safe. I felt like I could trust him. Trust myself. In the end, he gave me the courage to stand up for myself both at home and at school. He also gave me the courage to talk to mom and dad about what was going on between me and Talia. I do remember being afraid that I would be punished, but he reassured me that they wouldn’t, and that they loved me.
It was a difficult and awkward conversation, but in the end, arrangements were made for me to share a room with Rio and Nathan. I didn’t have much of a relationship with Talia for a long while, but after some years, we managed to patch things up. She apologized to me, and I came to understand the abuse she herself was subjected to by so-called family friends. She didn’t tell me this in an effort to excuse it, but to merely help give me closure to a difficult time from my own childhood. Mom and dad promised to be more attentive to us and we sort of established what I guess you would call an open door policy. We talk more about stuff that’s happening in our lives. Mom is much easier to talk to now. Dad is a little more patient with us too. I apologized to them for not coming to them sooner, and dad gave me a “nugget of wisdom” that I think I’ll live by: We can’t fix what we don’t know is broken. I’ve tried to make sure I talk to them when something is wrong, and I’ve tried to implement that in my life so I don’t have problems with other people.
I’m trying to grow up to be a good guy. I want to have good relationships with people. Nathan says I’m turning into a people pleaser, but I don’t necessarily see that as a terrible thing. I know when to say no to someone. Well, either way, I wanted to make sure I thank you for the help you gave us. I probably won’t remember writing this, but I hope I do find it again someday. Here’s hoping I turn into the man I feel you are. -John Age 16."
I stared at the letter, the words blurring as tears welled up in my eyes. I quickly brushed them away as I quietly spoke to no one in particular. “Thanks guys. I hope I live up to your expectations” I folded the letter, placed it in my pocket, and walked out of the room. After picking up my backpack and tripod, I silently walked towards the front door, my footsteps echoing in the empty house. I turned to look back at the empty living room one last time, and after a moment, I walked out.

Thanks to u/pillow-socks, I had the pleasure of watching X-Men: Evolution…24 years too late. Here are some random thoughts. If only to spark some discourse.
Although I prefer X-Men TAS+’97, I can appreciate why this show is loved. It’s a fresh and well engineered take on the X-Men mythos. It felt like they wanted to go in their own direction but where held back in for some reason. Perhaps a bit too insecure to move away from the Fox franchise. Perhaps executive meddling to promote brand synergy, I don’t know.
On that note, Wolverine’s costume change to the ultimate style was weak. Felt unnecessary.
Some of the long plays were surprisingly good. I didn’t think it was a coincidence that the principal was named Kelly but when he started the mayoral campaign and commenced a life in politics, it made sense. Chef’s kiss.
Deciding to show case the X-Men and Brotherhood was a good call. It allowed for some interesting story telling and rival dynamic. It also allowed for characters to develop outside there designated alignments and walk the line. Avalanche and Rogue are excellent examples and added a nice change from some two dimensional characters.
I wasn’t sure about them going to a random high school when they were literally living in the institute (school for gifted youngsters) but it makes a lot of sense in as the show developed. The nuances of learning in high school vice learning to control their powers and why the two locations was lost on me at first. Obviously I was biased by the traditional take on the school. However, it was an excellent way to show case discrimination. It felt more personal than just the typical indiscriminate prejudice. When the community turned on mutants it felt real.
Jean Gray’s character was surprisingly the best written version I’ve seen to date. She wasn’t a ‘perfect trophy’ girl but it was clear you could easily fall for her. She had personality, something I think is absent sometimes in depictions of her. There is a tendency to make her an object of affection, instead of a person. It generally impressed me throughout. I love the part where Scott calls her holier than thou commentary out in one of the early episodes. A great and humerus line.
Spyke was a walking cliché and boring until he joined the morlocks. Even his name was misspelled to be edgy. His entire character felt contrived and forced. Give him a 90s catch phrase and the circle is complete. I’m so glad the character then blossomed when he left the team with purpose. It was the right call. It’s a shame it happens so late. I wanted more.
Kitty… or was it 90s TAS Jubilee? They feel like the same annoying teenage trope. I’m sorry super fans, she was my least favourite character.
Interesting move to make Wolverine and Storm the elders. In my opinion Wolverine was used well and wasn’t over exposed. Although the final episodes felt like he was taking over when assaulting the pyramids. It felt like a missed opportunity for Cyclops to step up and see some fruition to his character arc. Overall, I appreciated the show’s dedication to maintaining an ensemble cast but it dropped off a bit towards the end.
Juggernaut’s origin and deviation from source material was just lazy. Literally an unnecessary throw away line for his limited screen time.
Scott and Jean’s relationship built organically and was well done. The absence of the Logan triangle was refreshing, as was Rouge’s crush on Scott. Although it was tragic, felt grounded, natural and not forced. It’s a shame we didn’t get enough time to see Rogue and Gambit grow. At least they got a moment.
Overall the seasons pace felt strange and off at times. For the most part it moved well and had meaningful growth, rarely maintains a status quo for the sake of it. Sometimes they would just have random filler episodes that distracted from the larger plot. Season 4 comes to mind as Apocalypse was very present and they just kind of ignored it for a few episodes. In later episodes they kind of implied they were at an impasse but if I wasn’t watching the episodes in order and instead on TV, I would have thought I missed some.
Loved that they found a way to put all the original X-Men in, not just an episode but, a mission together. Awesome.
I’m off to start Wolverine and the X-Men. Spoiler alert: watched the first episode and not impressed that they took the worst parts of the Fox movies and used that as a weak premise to make Wolverine the focal point. I know… I’ll give it a chance. On a positive note I like the character designs. Wolverine’s costume is great. I love the cowl.

When it comes to the technical side of this show, it's historical accuracies, the costumes, acting and backgrounds. I can understand. It WAS impressive, especially for a tv show
But like man, I'm starting to get desperate here, I get where the story was going for. I get the characters motivation but absolutely none of this show got me invested at any point. And yet I'm a sucker for slow burner political thrillers so this got me really confused.
So then, why do people praise this show as this sort of magnum opus exactly? Is it the production value that's higher than average? Is the story actually impressive and I'm somehow missing something? Because it felt very predictable to me and I felt horribly underwhelmed.
I'm gonna ask frankly, what qualities does this show have that warrants an unanimous 10 out of 10 from critics and the audience alike?
tl:dr : I thought Shogun was like a 6/10. Why are people calling it a masterpiece, is there something I'm missing?

I’m so glad this sub exists because I’ve been annoying everyone in my life with my theories about these two … I figured this would be the right place to post my speculation/lyric breakdowns of songs that they may have written about each other, split into different posts for albums for ease of reading.
Starting with Reputation (2017) – I imagine the failed relationship with Matty was still fresh for Taylor during the writing/recording of this album. Her reference to her “longings locked in lowercase inside a vault” definitely made me look back at Rep in a way I hadn’t before (and I do think we’ll see some Matty-coded vault tracks on TV”. That said I don’t want to erase her other relationships, especially with Joe, so I’ll make notes of where I think I’m either stretching for a Matty connection or I think there are multiple muses.
Special mention to “Getaway Car” which feels like another (fictionalized?) response to Robbers but the story she tells is very similar to her fling with Tom, especially given the third man in the song. I usually claim it for the maylors anyway bc who cares about Tom. Let me know what you think.
“...Ready For It?”
Knew he was a killer first time that I saw him / Wonder how many girls he had loved and left haunted / But if he's a ghost, then I can be a phantom
I can't ignore the connections here to two other songs thought to be written about M - Ghost (2014) and Haunted (2015) by Halsey (I won't bother going into the HalseyMatty lore here but I could in another post...)
"You're a Rolling Stone boy, never-sleep-alone boy / Got a million numbers and they're filling up your phone, boy" (Ghost) "I'm begging you to keep on haunting me" (Haunted) "My ghost / Where'd you go? / I can't find you in the body sleeping next to me" (Ghost)
I can be a phantom holdin' him for ransom / Knew I was a robber first time that he saw me / Stealing hearts and running off and never saying sorry / But if I'm a thief, then he can join the heist / And he can be my jailer
Robbers is one of The 1975’s most famous songs. In the music video two lovers stick up a convenience store - definitely worth a watch if you haven't seen it. In 2014 M dedicated the song to T in Dallas in November 2017 (a week after she attended the concert in LA) here and here
Burton to this Taylor
One of my favorite references that I think reveals a lot about the messy but irresistible relationship M and T seem to have. Here's a link to a great article about the wild love affair between Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton.
Every love I've known in comparison is a failure / I forget their names now, I'm so very tame now / Never be the same now
This sentiment is repeated throughout many of the songs I believe are about M. The idea of a life altering love is obviously prevalent across TTPD but also in folklore, evermore, and Midnights. ex. "I'm never gonna love again" (cowboy like me), "I don't remember who I was before you painted all my nights a color I have searched for since" (Question...?), "I felt aglow like this / Never before and never since" (loml)
Also want to mention This Must Be My Dream from 2016, which M has said is about an older gf but may fit: "Let me tell you 'bout this girl / I thought she'd rearrange my world"
No one has to know / In the middle of the night, in my dreams / You should see the things we do, baby
See Guilty as Sin? lol
Baby, let the games begin
Taylor in an interview with Glamour in February 2014:
TS: [Nods. Pauses.] I think everyone should approach relationships from the perspective of playing it straight and giving someone the benefit of the doubt. Until he establishes that this is a game. And if it's a game, you need to win. The best thing to do is just walk away from the table.
CL: Is that winning?
TS: It is when they come back. [Laughs.] And if they don't, then they didn't care enough to begin with.
conclusion: I believe ...Ready For It? is a response to Robbers and reveals M and T's similar romanticism (sometimes toxic but so addicting). The mirrored stylization of ...Ready For It? and Question...? makes me think the latter is a continuation of the former. The mentions of “island breeze” and “we’ll move to an island” have made people believe this song is about Tom Hiddleston but other lyrics, namely “younger than my exes” pretty clearly contradicts that.
"End Game"
I wanna be your end game / I wanna be your first string /I wanna be your A-Team
Funny reading this after The Alchemy and So High School.
Big reputation, big reputation / Ooh, you and me, we got big reputations / And you heard about me / Ooh, you and me would be a big conversation
And they were! Especially because T hadn't been really linked to anyone after Harry, the speculation about her and M came hard and fast. M especially was inundated with questions in the months after the LA and NYC shows.
And I heard about you / You like the bad ones, too
Another possible reference to a Halsey song, this time Hurricane from 2014: "He says, "Oh, baby, beggin' you to save me / Well, lately I like 'em crazy/ Oh, maybe, you could devastate me"
I don't wanna touch you, I don't wanna be / Just another ex-love you don't wanna see / I don't wanna miss you / Like the other girls do
Very reminiscent of The 1975's song Somebody Else, released in 2016, speculated to be about T: "I don't want your body / But I hate to think about you with somebody else"
I hit you like bang, we tried to forget it, but we just couldn't
"Flashbacks waking me up / I get drunk, but it's not enough" (Death By A Thousand Cuts)
And I bury hatchets, but I keep maps of where I put 'em
"I circled you on a map / I haven't come around in so long" (The Alchemy)
Reputation precedes me, they told you I'm crazy
"And they tried to warn you about me" (The Albatross)
And I can't let you go, your hand prints on my soul
"Marked me like a bloodstain" (Cardigan)
It's like your eyes are liquor, it's like your body is gold
So many of the songs speculated to be about M reference his eyes but the most relevant (not the starry eyed motif which we'll get to in the future) are: "Eyes like sinking ships on waters / So inviting I almost jump in" (gold rush) and "But your eyes are flying saucers from another planet / Now I'm all for you like Janet" (Snow On The Beach)
"Deep blue, but you painted me golden" (Dancing With Our Hands Tied)
You've been calling my bluff on all my usual tricks / So here's the truth from my red lips
From the same Glamour article, Taylor talking about her 'trick' when dating:
CL: What's the freeze-out?
TS: You don't respond to any of his texts or calls until he does something desperate [like] shows up. Or he calls and leaves a voice mail. Something that makes it very clear to you that he's interested.
disclaimer: I am someone who thinks the Tom relationship was not that serious for T, so this song imo fits what she may have told us about her relationship with M more, though the beach reference does point to Tom in a way.
"Don't Blame Me"
I've been breaking hearts a long time / And toying with them older guys / Just playthings for me to use
See the quotes from the Glamour article above. "Younger than my exes, but he act like such a man, so" (...Ready For It?)
Something happened for the first time / In the darkest little paradise
May refer to the dark concert venue where they met for the first time (see So It Goes... for more)
For you / I would cross the line / I would waste my time / I would lose my mind / They say, "She's gone too far this time."
Sentiment that is repeated throughout TTPD, but most clearly in But Daddy I Love Him
My name is whatever you decide / And I'm just gonna call you mine
Though this could be a stretch, in the spotify storyline for The 1975's Oh Caroline (2022), speculated to be about T, M said "It's an invented character, where the cadence really mattered. It couldn't be "Oh Linda" or "Oh Jane" [or "Oh Taylor"] - you had to have a 3 syllable that really works. I knew what the song was about, I had felt that about someone before and I got to write an episodic, mini movie about the subject"
disclaimer: If about M, this song is very on the nose with the drug references. Generally it's a very vague song and could easily be about Joe or another ex.
"So It Goes..."
See you in the dark / All eyes on you, my magician / All eyes on us / You make everyone disappear
Likely refers to the first time T saw M in person, when she was front row at The 1975's LA show. All eyes were on M then (including T's)
"Once upon a time, the planets and the fates / And all the stars aligned / You and I ended up in the same room / At the same time" (Mastermind)
Tripping, tripping when you're gone
May relate to Don't Blame Me: "Trip of my life / every time you're touching me"
'Cause we breakdown a little / But when you get me alone, it's so simple
Maybe a stretch but M famously had a breakdown on stage in Boston on December 6, 2014. In an interview with the Guardian he said: “There was girl stuff. There was family stuff. There was financial stuff. There was drug stuff. I remember hearing the crowd and having an identity crisis. I thought: ‘If you want to see a show, I’ll give you a fucking show. If you’ve come to see the jester drink himself into a slumber, I’ll give it to you.’ I felt like I’d become an idea as opposed to being a person.”
“And I was 25 and afraid to go outside” (Give Yourself a Try)
And all the pieces fall / Right into place
"I laid the groundwork and then, just like clockwork / The dominoes cascaded in a line" (Mastermind)
Getting caught up in a moment / Lipstick on your face
"I said, "Don't fall in love with the moment" / She said I've got a lot to learn / Don't fall in love with the moment /And think you're in love with the girl" (She's American)
Come here, dressed in black now
"Yeah, we're dressed in black from head to toe" (Chocolate). Taylor was also wearing all black the night of the LA show.
conclusion: You did a number on me / But, honestly, baby, who's counting? / I did a number on you / But, honestly, baby, who's counting? ( "King of My Heart"
We met a few weeks ago / Now you try on callin' me "baby" like tryin' on clothes
The reason why I don't necessarily think Joe fits. They met at the Met Gala in 2017 and she very quickly started seeing Tom, obviously it could still be him but I wanted to note this.
"Don't call me 'kid,' don't call me 'baby' / Look at this idiotic fool that you made me" (illicit affairs)
And you move to me like I'm a Motown beat
M loves Motown, even sampling a track by The Temptations on Tonight (I Wish I Was Your Boy). He's also always loved dancing, which you can see in the videos for A Change of Heart and Oh Caroline.
Salute to me I'm your American Queen / Say you fancy me, not fancy stuff
He's English, obviously.
And we rule the kingdom inside my room / With all these nights we're spending / Up on the roof with a school girl crush
Totally speculation but M and T hiding out in her NYC home makes a lot of sense from other pieces she has shared about the relationship “My kingdom come undone” (Hoax)
Late in the night, the city's asleep / Your love is a secret I'm hoping, dreaming, dying to keep
Speculation again but fits with the story of M and T as mostly loving each other in secret (see Dancing With Our Hands Tied and Dress)
Is this the end of all the endings? / My broken bones are mending
As mentioned above, T had seemingly taken a break from dating after the breakup with Harry.
disclaimer: Definitely not 100% sure on this one as there is convincing evidence that it is about J
"Dancing With Our Hands Tied"
I, I loved you in secret / First sight, yeah, we love without reason / Oh, 25 years old
M and T were both born in 1989, M was 25 when they first met and dated and T was turning 25.
My, my love had been frozen / People started talking, putting us through our paces / I knew there was no one in the world who could take it / I loved you in spite of / Deep fears that the world would divide us
“A red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground / With no one around to tweet it” (The Lakes)
In an interview with the Guardian Matty said: “The day after she’d been to a show of ours, someone sent me a screenshot of E! News with the headline ‘Who is Matt Healy?’ That freaked me out. I’m not ready to indulge in that world and I’m not ready to be judged by that world.” So sad to read knowing that they dealt with a similar situation nearly a decade later.
Picture of your face in an invisible locket
“Wear you like a necklace” (So It Goes…)
And darling, you had turned my bed into a sacred oasis
“Now you hang from my lips / Like the Gardens of Babylon / With your boots beneath my bed” (cowboy like me)
I'd kiss you as the lights went out / Swaying as the room burned down / I'd hold you as the water rushes in / If I could dance with you again
Reminds me so much of the music video for cardigan, where T slips into a rough ocean and hangs on to a piano. Also from cardigan: “Leaving like a father / Running like water”
“Dress”
Our secret moments in a crowded room / They got no idea about me and you
"Did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room / And every single one of your friends was / Making fun of you" (Question...?)
There is an indentation in the shape of you / Made your mark on me, a golden tattoo
M seemingly makes a lasting impression: “Deep blue, but you painted me golden” (Dancing With Our Hands Tied) “The mark they saw on my collarbone” (Maroon) “Marked me like a bloodstain” (cardigan)
'Cause I don't want you like a best friend
T often seems to refer to a friendship with M, perhaps they tried it a few times: “We were supposed to be just friends” (Glitch) “Like you were my closest friend” (Maroon) “Just say when, I'd play again / He was my best friend / Down at the sandlot” (My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys)
And if I get burned, at least we were electrified
“I'd kiss you as the lights went out / Swaying as the room burned down” (Dancing With Our Hands Tied)
I'm spilling wine in the bathtub / You kiss my face and we're both drunk
Many of the possible M songs refer to M and T’s love of wine. “And I can see us twisted in bedsheets / August slipped away like a bottle of wine” (august) “The burgundy on my T-shirt when you splashed your wine into me / And how the blood rushed into my cheeks, so scarlet, it was (maroon)” (Maroon)
disclaimer - Obviously most likely about Joe given the reference to the 2017 Met Gala but I think it was worth a mention!
“Call It What You Want”
My baby's fly like a jet stream / High above the whole scene
Probably a double-entendre. M considers himself slightly on the outside of the ‘scene’ but this can come across as self assurance. This also could refer to literally being high on drugs
Loves me like I'm brand new
After T’s clever use of The Starting Line in TTPD I’m convinced she’s referring to the band Brand New. M posted a Brand New album on his ig story in 2020.
All my flowers grew back as thorns
An interesting contrast to “I once was poison ivy, but now I'm your daisy” from Don’t Blame Me
Windows boarded up after the storm
“I look through the windows of this love / Even though we boarded them up” (Death By A Thousand Cuts)
I'm laughing with my lover
“Laughing with my feet in your lap” (Maroon) “Please don't ever become a stranger / Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere” (New Year’s Day)
Making forts under covers
Matty famously built a fort in ATPOAIM 3. “I'll build you a fort on some planet / Where they can all understand it” (Down Bad)
Trust him like a brother
“Like I lost my twin” (Down Bad)
Starry eyes sparking up my darkest night
So many starry eyed references which is terribly romantic and terribly sad. “Do I really have to chart the constellations in his eyes?” (High Infidelity), “Your opal eyes are all I wish to see” (ivy), “Eyes full of stars” (cowboy like me), and “Gazing at me starry-eyed” (The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived)
I want to wear his initial on a chain 'round my neck
“Picture of your face in an invisible locket” (Dancing With Our Hands Tied) “Wear you like a necklace” (So It Goes…)
I recall late November, holding my breath
Late November fits perfectly into the timeline of M and T’s 2014 relationship. Late October to Late DecembeEarly January makes the most sense.
Slowly I said, "You don't need to save me / But would you run away with me?"
“You're mad thinking you could ever save me. Not looking like that.” (A Change of Heart)
disclaimer: Again lots of Joe references in this as well so take this with a grain of salt.
“New Year’s Day”
You and me from the night before, but / Don't read the last page
From Me and You Together Song (2020): “I think the story needs more pages, yes.” The reference to “the last page” also makes this song feel like more of a reminiscence than a song about a current lover.
I want your midnights / But I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day
Impossible not to reread these lyrics after Midnights was released as a nod to M: “When the morning came we / Were cleaning incense off your / Vinyl shelf ‘cause we lost track of time again” (Maroon)
You squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi / I can tell that it's gonna be a long road / I'll be there if you're the toast of the town, babe / Or if you strike out and you're crawling home
Especially after the release of TTPD it seems that both T and M made many promises to each other that they couldn’t keep
Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you / Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you / Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you / And I will hold on to you
The reference to memories here creates a bit of a confusing feeling about the muse for this song. Although T seems to be talking in the present tense I do think these are memories and dreams for a past relationship.
“Hold on and hope that we'll find our way back in the end / Do you think I have forgotten? / Do you think I have forgotten? / Do you think I have forgotten / About you?” (About You)
Please don't ever become a stranger / Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere / Please don't ever become a stranger / Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere
Not much to say about this but ow!
You and me forevermore
Again reminds me of Me and You Together Song (which I do buy as a song at least partially about T). And of course links to Evermore.
disclaimer: This could absolutely be about Joe but it does feel almost like a goodbye to M, closing the album. It’s as if she is reading “the last page”
Congrats if you read this lol. I clearly have too much time on my hands

So Alice did a mini Q&A on Tumblr today after Netflix dropped the teaser for S3. Tumblr is awful to try and navigate finding the Qs that go with the As, so I've just collected and posted them here. Spoilers ahead for S3, and Vol 4+5 of the comics!
how come you changed it from tank top to vest? lots of americans confused by vest 😅
because I thought about someone actually saying the phrase ‘tank top’ with a British accent and it sounded so weird and awkward in my mind, ‘vest’ was the more realistic word (at least for people from my region of England lol). Sometimes things that are written in the comic would actually sound quite awkward and odd if the cast said them out loud, so I change them!
Was that the full first scene or was it cut for the teaser?
it was cut for the teaser! The full scene is longer (and the billie song was just for the trailer!)
i’m in shock that billie let them debut a new song in it
ME TOO
are there any new photos added on charlie’s wall of him and nick together?
haha there are new photos in both rooms yes!
I’m so in love with the little trailer! My Question is: How did you feel, knowing you are dropping the trailer without anyone expecting something? 😄😍
i wished i could have teased it harder but because it was a collab (of sorts) with billie eilish’s team I didn’t want to do anything that might ruin it or not be what they wanted! 😅
I’m wondering if we’ll get a proper look at the new pictures in Charlie’s room at some point 🙇🏻‍♀️
of COURSE we shall
Not sure if you can answer this, and I could have a guess anyway, but is that trailer the complete moment or is the scene longer than that with more conversations that have been cut to make the trailer?
the scene is longer in the show, it had to be cut very short for the trailer!
was having tori's hair short from the get-go just for the sake of continuity or was there a.... deeper choice there..... i luv all the solitaire references in volume 4 sm so i'll take what i can get in the show hehe
so the thing about in-story haircuts in TV - they are a production nightmare. The show is filmed completely non-chronologically, so if Tori had long hair at the start, that would be a huge amount of extra work for the haimakeup department. It takes at least an hour to get an actor in or out of a wig. It just makes things very difficult and we always have an extremely hectic and tight schedule so we decided it’d be easier for her to just have short hair from the start!
I’m honestly so excited about s3. When you said that the ferris wheel scene was modified does that mean that the talk that Tori has with Charlie about her being asexual will that not be in s3?
yes that’s correct, I’m saving that story for S4 where I can build up to it much more effectively 🙏 you’ll see when you watch s3 that there just wasn’t the room to give that storyline the space it needs!
it was so amazing alice 😭 we cannot wait for more, we are all so beyond excited !!
one question : is there more to the opening scene, like will it have more dialogue between Tori & Charlie similar to the comics ? i assumed the opening scene was just cut that way to fit the 45 seconds teaser format and Billie Eilish's new song clip (HUGE congrats on tha btw oh my god ?? we were all so surprised and elated)
yayyyy I’m glad you enjoyed!! Yes that’s correct, the full scene is longer!
Have you considered filming season 2 and 3 one after another??
I could not have written the scripts in time, I barely managed to write the S2 scripts in time 😅
Of course we were all very excited!! Did this season feel different to make with the subject matter a bit darker and more mature? Can’t wait to see it!!!
yes definitely! Lots of new experiences and vibes on set. But I guess it’s an intense experience no matter what!
I know you already answered about the swearing but there's a debate on twitter rn so: will they say 'fuck', specifically?
yes 😂
ALICE IT WAS MAGICAL!! I CANNOT WAIT FOR PROMO TO START!!!
YAY same!!!!!
Not specifically about the trailer, but when you started writing season three did you already know by that point Olivia would not be available or did you have to do re-writes to take Sarah out of the story?
I knew it was a possibility but it wasn’t confirmed until very close to the shoot. I had to do some quite intense last minute rewrites 😅 but I’d already thought about what I’d do in that scenario so I was somewhat prepared!
The trailer was so lovely, it made my whole week! I love the brother-sister moments with Tori and Charlie; Joe and Jenny are so great together on screen. Will we get to see Tori and Nick interact more in this season?
a little yes! 💖
will there be a s3 music playlist on spotify?? or will the s3 music get added to the current playlist?? that would be amazing!!!💕🍂
I’m sure someone will make an s3 playlist!! Netflix control the Heartstopper Spotify playlists so it’ll be up to them!
do you feel like this season uses social media (inside the narrative) more or less than season 2? i love how important it was to the story for s2 and the way it was shown on screen - was there more or less present in s3?
difficult to say… there’s a fair bit of it for sure but maybe not as much as S2? Not sure tho!
why did you decide to change the line from tank top in the comics to vest ? did it just make more sense regionally that he would say vest ? (genuinely curious!)
indeed, ‘tank top’ just didn’t sound like something a British teen boy would say! Sometimes the things I write in the comic sound awkward when they’re spoken out loud by a real person 😂
Joe and Kit’s ability to make heart eyes is truly unparalleled. They deserve all the awards.
Could not be more excited for season 3!!!
One question that I’m sure you’ve answered but I’m not sure where - do you do the animations for the show? The “I love you” in the promo looked like a new style and I liked it a lot! Just curious. Thanks for everything 🥰
the animations are done by an animator named Anna Peronetto! She is brilliant!!
can you tell us anything about the artists that will be part of this season's soundtrack?
I’d say there are some heartstopper classics but also a bunch of new artists! Sorry to be vague, I don’t want to spoil 🥺
This is random and about season 1, but can you settle a debate about what exactly the snow was made of in the snow day scene? 🙃❄️
pretty sure it was a mix of foam and powder depending on what it was used for 🤔
Will the rating be higher? It is 12 usually but with season 3 being described with mature themes will it become a 15? Can't bwlieve we are in the season 3 era already!
I believe it depends on country and it’s not up to me, but the rating is likely to increase yes, mostly due to slightly more swearing, sex scenes, and mental health themes. I think it really edges the border between a 12 and a 15 in the UK so I’m really not sure how it’ll be rated!
Also, do you have a favorite episode yet? 👀
I love every episode of s3 truly, but I think ep 4 is something special and maybe the best heartstopper ep I’ve written across all three seasons!! Very proud of it 💖
seriously cannot describe how excited I am for s3 - when filming and editing scenes with michael and tori is it really strange to see them on screen when they were really the first two main characters you wrote about?? what was that like seeing them actually come to life? (also i am the self proclaimed most excited for michael to appear, cannot wait to see how darragh portrays him as he seems amazing!!)
so so strange!!! But wonderful! They’re my firstborns and it’s strange to see them here while also not really seeing the full story that we know they have. Darragh and Jenny are amazing and I can’t wait for you to see them together on screen 🥹 the first moment you see them together is SO special, it almost makes me cry every time
I know Jonathan bailey has said he reached out through a mutual friend about joining heartstopper. If you are able to answer, what came first; Jonathan bailey or jack/Henry Maddox? (Aka, was that character and scene always going to be included in the series? - i love that mini comic so much!)
Henry Maddox has been around for a couple of years now!! When Jonathan told us he wanted to be involved, me and Wren (who created Henry Maddox!) thought this would be the perfect role for him and a great opportunity for a more comedic sequence in the show (while also tying him into some of the themes of that specific ep… but now I’m getting too spoilery) ! (And obvs we had to change the name due to Henry the pug)
I'm curious about the scenes with Geoff. In the comics they're mostly mentioned instead of shown in detail. Will we get to see bits of Charlie's therapy sessions, or will they be shown in a sort of montage?
we will see some!
with the teaser clip saying coming October 3th does that mean the season won’t be spilt in two parts? 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼
as far as I know, it won’t!
what was the confusing situation with ur insta stories from a few days ago 😭
So I thought the image was a deliberate tease from Netflix - turns out it was actually a mistake so I deleted my stories. Then they emailed to say I could leave up my stories if I wanted to, but I’d already deleted them 😅
Hey Alice, not a question but just wanted to apologise again for what I said about the spoilers the other week. I didn't think about the costumes and sets. I have felt bad about being so silly ever since! I was just hoping to try and help you feel a even a tiny bit better 💜 super super excited for S3! Heartstopper is one of my special interests and brings me a huge deal of comfort on tough days 🥰 it's a beautiful world you have created 🥹
omg please don’t feel bad, I wasn’t at all annoyed or mad at you!! You have nothing to worry about and you definitely did all make me feel a bit better after that happened 💖 Thank you for loving and supporting Heartstopper, it really means so much!! 💖💖💖

Rotten Tomatoes: 89% (37 reviews) with 8.60 in average rating
Metacritic: 84/100 (26 critics)
As with other movies, the scores are set to change as time passes. Meanwhile, I'll post some short reviews on the movie. It's structured like this: quote first, source second. Beware, some contain spoilers.

As much as I loved the character of Furiosa in “Fury Road,” do we really need to see her tangled, deep-dive-that-somehow-stays-on-the-surface origin story? It’s an impulse, at heart, that grows out of franchise culture, and maybe that’s why “Furiosa,” for all the tasty stuff in it, is a half-satisfying movie. Miller creates a volatile world to wander around in, and I suspect a number of viewers and critics will respond fully to that. But part of the genius of the “Mad Max” films is that when they’re pumping on all cylinders, even when they’re as grand as “The Road Warrior” and “Fury Road,” they are also, in spirit, as lean and mean as one of those lethal spiked jalopies zooming down the blacktop. In attempting to inflate his universe into something larger, Miller clutters it with pretension and makes it mean less. He takes his eye off the place where the rubber meets the road.

-Owen Gleiberman, Variety

Whether "Furiosa" is even better than "Fury Road" is less important than the obvious fact that it makes "Fury Road" even better than it was before.

-David Ehrlich, IndieWire: A–

So tip your the greasy, dusty, battered hat to George Miller, who is pulling off some kind of ridiculous feat by turning these grungy action movies into a grand saga.

-Steve Pond, TheWrap

It’s hard to overstate how immaculately crafted Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga is, both as a prequel to Max Max: Fury Road and as a stand-alone story of how the Wasteland created a powerful character. With a ferocious and savage heart, George Miller’s film takes flight into epic status. Weaving together top-notch worldbuilding, an emotionally resonant directorial eye, searing performances, sharp cinematography, and a Hell-raising score, this is a remarkable hero’s journey punctuated by incredible action scenes and an utterly stunning reflection on life and love prevailing beyond the fall of civilization. Maybe Hideo Kojima said it best: “George Miller is my God, and the Saga he tells is my Bible.” Witness it.

-Lex Briscuso, IGN: 10/10 "masterpiece"

The chassis may look familiar but there is a very different engine driving Furiosa from that of Fury Road: it’s a rich, sprawling epic that only strengthens and deepens the Max-mythology. It shall ride eternal!

-John Nugent, Empire: 5/5

Filmmaker George Miller returns to the Wasteland to tell us how the 'Mad Max' savior took her own hero's journey — and delivers another high-octane knockout.

-David Fear, Rolling Stone

In a sense, Dementus is a character artificially contrived to give Furiosa someone to face off with, a warlord distinct from Immortan Joe. But Taylor-Joy and Hemsworth are a great pairing and Taylor-Joy is an overwhelmingly convincing action heroine. She sells this sequel.

-Peter Bradshaw, The Guardian: 4/5

Inevitably, these two movies will play together on double bills in revival houses for decades, or maybe Miller will want to find a way to splice them together into a six-hour epic. The match between them appears seamless, and in fact Miller and co-writer Nico Lathouris created the whole origin and backstory of Furiosa in novel and script form even before setting out to make Fury Road. This is the best screenplay of any Mad Max film, with much to say.

-Pete Hammond, Deadline

Hate to be a grouch when legions of social media film bros are breathlessly worshipping at the altar of The Demi-God of Cinema, George Miller, but Furiosa is a big step down from Mad Max: Fury Road. Whereas the 2015 instant action classic had grit, gravitas and turbo-charged propulsion that wouldn’t quit, this fifth installment in the dystopian saga grinds on in fits and starts, with little tension or fluidity in a narrative whose shapelessness is heightened by its pretentious chapter structure.

-David Rooney, The Hollywood Reporter

I will continue to update this post as reviews come in.
Rotten Tomatoes: Fresh
Critics Consensus: Retroactively enriching Fury Road with greater emotional heft if not quite matching it in propulsive throttle, Furiosa is another glorious swerve in mastermind George Miller's breathless race towards cinematic Valhalla.

	Score	Number of Reviews	Average Rating
All Critics	88%	34	8.60/10
Top Critics	79%	19	8.50/10

Metacritic: 83 (25 Reviews)
Sample Reviews:
It all adds up to is a movie that can be darkly bedazzling, and that will be embraced and defended in a dozen passionate ways -- but it’s one that, to me, falls very short of being a “Mad Max” home run. - Owen Gleiberman, Variety
Anya Taylor-Joy is a fierce presence in the title role and Chris Hemsworth is clearly having fun as a gonzo Wasteland warlord, but the mythmaking lacks muscle, just as the action mostly lacks the visual poetry of its predecessor. - David Rooney, Hollywood Reporter
Miller is such a wildly inventive filmmaker that it’s been easy to forget that he keeps making movies about the end of life as we know it... It’s only with “Furiosa” that I now understand he’s also one kick-ass prophet of doom. - Manohla Dargis, New York Times
Taylor-Joy and Hemsworth are a great pairing and Taylor-Joy is an overwhelmingly convincing action heroine. She sells this sequel. 4/5 - Peter Bradshaw, Guardian
This is a film made with purposeful savagery, and with considerable wit and lyricism, too. It has the concentrated intensity of 2015’s Fury Road, to which it is a prequel, and yet it unfolds across a far broader canvas. 5/5 - Geoffrey Macnab, Guardian
A thundering beginning and a searing sense of place fail to compensate for the wearisome repetition and empty theatrics that slowly swamp this much-awaited blockbuster. 2/5 - Kevin Maher, Times (UK)
The film may handle differently to its predecessor, but it’s clearly been tuned by the same engineers. After the pared-down drag racer, here comes the juggernaut. 5/5 - Robbie Collin, Daily Telegraph (UK)
Despite its many, many action sequences, and a symphonic cacophony of motorbikes vrooming in the sand, the movie... evolves into a slog that’s working hard to persuade us we’re having a good time, though it may not be actually giving us one. - Stephanie Zacharek, TIME Magazine
Furiosa runs on a high-octane philosophical perspective that finds hope in a hopeless place. Also, a lot of cars go fast and shit blows up. It’s a win-win. - David Fear, Rolling Stone
Furiosa is a fine prelude to that mighty arc. Its initial rattling gradually gives way to the robust and satisfying purr of Miller, despite everything, making it work. - Richard Lawson, Vanity Fair
Action sequences charge forward and build and build, casually leaving all manner of bodies in their wake. - Bilge Ebiri, New York Magazine/Vulture
The chassis may look familiar but there is a very different engine driving Furiosa from that of Fury Road: it’s a rich, sprawling epic that only strengthens and deepens the Max-mythology. It shall ride eternal! 5/5 - John Nugent, Empire Magazine
While it’s absolutely a blast at the cinema, the dizzying heights that Miller drove us back in 2015 aren’t quite matched a second time around. 4/5 - Hannah Strong, Little White Lies
You soon reach the point where you're sick of sand, sick of explosions, sick of off-puttingly sadistic violence, and sick of thunderous drums bashing away on the soundtrack, and yet the film keeps piling on more and more and more of them. 3/5 - Nicholas Barber, BBC.com
Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga doesn’t feel like an overture for the vehicular carnage of Fury Road so much as it retroactively makes Fury Road feel like a coda for the epic tale Miller tells here. A- - David Ehrlich, indieWire
Furiosa is a jaw-dropping achievement. It’s a hyper-realistic vision of the apocalypse, a Greek myth made into an outsized blockbuster spectacle. - Hoai-Tran Bui, Inverse
High on exhaust and the limitless capabilities of cinema, this no-brakes franchise keeps careening onward as if it could run forever. - Charles Bramesco, Decider
Furiosa is such a thrilling ride, packed with set pieces that are a masterclass in staging action, that it’s a little sad when the plot veers towards the events of the previous movie — because we know that’s where the ride ends. A - Liz Shannon Miller, Consequence
A big, entertaining popcorn movie, told with a sense of adventure and play.... “Furiosa” aims to blow you away. And it does. To Valhalla and beyond. 4/4 - Robert Daniels, RogerEbert.com
SYNOPSIS:
As the world fell, young Furiosa is snatched from the Green Place of Many Mothers and falls into the hands of a great Biker Horde led by the Warlord Dementus. Sweeping through the Wasteland they come across the Citadel presided over by The Immortan Joe. While the two Tyrants war for dominance, Furiosa must survive many trials as she puts together the means to find her way home.
CAST:

• Anya Taylor-Joy as Imperator Furiosa
• Chris Hemsworth as Doctor Dementus
• Tom Burke as Praetorian Jack
• Alyla Browne as Young Furiosa

DIRECTED BY: George Miller
PRODUCED BY: Doug Mitchell, George Miller
WRITTEN BY: George Miller, Nico Lathouris
EXECUTIVE PRODUCERS: Dean Hood
DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY: Simon Duggan
PRODUCTION DESIGNER: Colin Gibson
EDITED BY: Eliot Knapman, Margaret Sixel
MUSIC BY: Tom Holkenborg
COSTUME DESIGNER: Jenny Beavan
CASTING BY: Nikki Barrett
RUNTIME: 148 Minutes
RELEASE DATE: May 24, 2024

Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga - Review Thread

• Rotten Tomatoes: 87% (31 Reviews)
  • Critics Consensus: Retroactively enriching Fury Road with greater emotional heft if not quite matching it in propulsive throttle, Furiosa is another glorious swerve in mastermind George Miller's breathless race towards cinematic Valhalla.
• Metacritic: 83 (25 Reviews)

Reviews:
Deadline:

Nine years later comes a prequel, Furosia: A Mad Max Saga, and Miller, now seemingly ageless at 79 (he was 34 when the first one came out) has perhaps given birth to the greatest Max yet, a wheels-up, rock-and-rolling epic that delivers the origin story of the title character Charlize Theron picked up in Fury Road when she was about 26.

Hollywood Reporter (60):

Anya Taylor-Joy is a fierce presence in the title role and Chris Hemsworth is clearly having fun as a gonzo Wasteland warlord, but the mythmaking lacks muscle, just as the action mostly lacks the visual poetry of its predecessor.

Variety (60):

“Furiosa,” like “Beyond Thunderdome,” wants to be something loftier than an action blowout, but the movie is naggingly episodic, and though it’s got two indomitable villains, neither one quite becomes the delirious badass you want.

IGN (10/10):

George Miller’s Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga weaves a hero’s journey of epic proportions, ushering in a powerful reflection on what it means to live and love in a dying world.

Empire (100):

The chassis may look familiar but there is a very different engine driving Furiosa from that of Fury Road: it’s a rich, sprawling epic that only strengthens and deepens the Max-mythology. It shall ride eternal!

NME (100):

Brilliant and unmissable.

The Independent (100):

Director George Miller combines speed, grace and explosive violence, emulating Sam Peckinpah westerns and even, at times, the work of Charles Dickens – Furiosa is a bit like a young Artful Dodger, using her wits and courage to stay alive.

The Telegraph (100):

The film may handle differently to its predecessor, but it’s clearly been tuned by the same engineers. After the pared-down drag racer, here comes the juggernaut.

The Guardian (4/5):

‘My childhood! My mother! I want them back!” With this howl of anguish, young Furiosa, played by Anya Taylor-Joy, sets the tone of vengeful rage that runs through George Miller’s immersive, spectacular prequel to his Mad Max reboot from 2015.

IndieWire (A-):

How do we brave the world’s cruelties? By refusing to become them ourselves. Such an internally combusting prequel might seem like a strange lead-in to a movie that spit fire in every direction, but don’t you worry: George Miller still has what it takes to make it epic.

SlashFilm (10/10):

Miller is fluent in the universal language of "this kicks ass," conducting a symphony of flamethrowers, explosives, burnt rubber, twisted metal, blood, sweat, and gasoline. Bullets double as percussive instruments, engines roar like a choir, and both Anya Taylor-Joy and Tom Burke, who plays War Rig leader Praetorian Jack, share the first chair position. "Furiosa" will undoubtedly go down as one of — if not the — greatest prequel films ever made. Not only does it stand on its own as a masterful action-adventure blockbuster, but it also exemplifies Miller's thesis as a whole: that survival "in extremis" reveals the true essence of a person. "Fury Road" is an even better movie because of "Furiosa," and George Miller has gifted the world with his magnum opus. Witness him.

Rolling Stone (90):

Furiosa runs on a high-octane philosophical perspective that finds hope in a hopeless place. Also, a lot of cars go fast and sh*t blows up. It’s a win-win.

TotalFilm (4/5):

Is Furiosa as magnificent as Fury Road? No, though not because it’s the first Mad Max movie without Max, whose absence barely registers. At 140 minutes minus credits, it’s a touch unwieldy, while its lament for the inevitability of war and the emptiness of revenge feels hollow given the giddy excitement it stirs from just these things. But what can’t be disputed is that Miller, the Mad genius, has done it again, once more refusing to simply repeat himself and instead choosing to kick up dust rather than gather it as he forges a new path through the Wasteland in often spectacular fashion.

The Wrap (75):

So tip your the greasy, dusty, battered hat to George Miller, who is pulling off some kind of ridiculous feat by turning these grungy action movies into a grand saga.

Polygon (85):

So even as Furiosa is inevitably compared with Fury Road, both positively and negatively, put your trust in Miller’s weird, wild filmmaking.

Collider (7/10):

At the end of the day, perhaps if Furiosa was released first, plunging us into Furiosa's introduction without knowing where she'd end up, the film would have had a stronger impact. But because it is a prequel, it will struggle under the shadow of a film that is technically and cinematically superior. Held up by Alyla Browne and Anya Taylor-Joy as stellar leads, Furiosa can be inspiring at the best of times — an Edmond Dantès-level story about revenge. But, at the worst of times, the film feels as bloated and unwieldy as The People Eater, dragged down by too many ideas. Does the good outweigh the bad? Just barely, but not enough to dethrone its predecessor.

Synopsis:

Set 15 to 20 years before the events of Mad Max: Fury Road, as the world falls apart, young Furiosa is snatched from the Green Place of Many Mothers and into the hands of a Biker Horde led by the Warlord Dementus. While two Tyrants war for dominance over the Citadel, Furiosa survives many trials as she plots a way back home through the Wasteland.

Directed by George Miller
Cast:

• Anya Taylor-Joy as Imperator Furiosa
  • Alyla Browne as young Furiosa
• Chris Hemsworth as Dementus, the warlord leader of the Bike Horde which abducted Furiosa.
• Tom Burke as Praetorian Jack
• Lachy Hulme as Immortan Joe / Rizzdale Pell
• Goran D. Kleut as The Octoboss
• Nathan Jones as Rictus Erectus
• Josh Helman as Scrotus
• John Howard as The People Eater
• Angus Sampson as The Organic Mechanic
• Charlee Fraser as Mary Jo Bassa, Furiosa's mother
• Quaden Bayles
• Daniel Webber as War Boy

Hey Folks! I saw a few posts here seeking work, so hoping it's okay to post an opportunity! Just lemme know and close it if not.
Pocket Gems, a mobile game company, is seeking an experienced visual storytelling scripter to work with us on a paid, remote, temp basis on a new romance game.
What You'll Do:
• From a completed script, you’ll use Naninovel within Unity to execute a well-paced dynamic scene: laying out characters, controlling the camera, adding animations, adding transitions, etc. • You’ll be given a library of characters, costumes, backgrounds, and animations to help create compelling interactive scenes. • You’ll work closely with the Game Lead, Story lead, and writer to iterate on each scene of the game.
Required Experience: • Unity • NaniNovel (or an equivalent codebase that makes you confident you can pick this up quickly.)
Extra Gems For: • GitHub • Jira • Episode Interactive Tools • A love of reality TV, dating shows, and romantic entertainment
Apply Here: https://forms.gle/pq4bzNd5gNN58cwH6
**Please note that you must be at least 18 years old and live in the U.S.A. or U.K. to be considered for this position.

I have a M512a-H6 soundbar connected via eARC to a Hisense U8K TV. I suspect my issue may apply to other Vizio soundbars with DTS:X, though I can only confirm it with the M512a-H6.
As of today, Disney+ apps on IMAX Enhanced-certified TVs like my Hisense U8K can now stream DTS:X audio from certain IMAX Enhanced programs to DTS:X AVRs & soundbars. https://press.disneyplus.com/news/disney-plus-queen-rock-montreal-imax-enhanced-sound-dts Other sources have indicated that the Disney+ version of DTS:X is lossy, unlike most other versions of DTS:X, but is backwards compatible with traditional DTS.
I am currently getting DTS from my Hisense's Disney+ app; internal info screens confirm my audio from Queen Rock Montreal & Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness is DTS:X. However, my soundbar only recognizes it as "DTS Digital Surround" -- traditional or "core" DTS.
I had the same issue last year with the 4K Blu-rays of Fast & Furious 6 and Furious 7, both with DTS:X on a DTS-HD High Resolution Audio codec (vs. DTS-HD Master Audio on nearly all other Blu-rays with DTS:X, which are properly treated as DTS:X). Reportedly, some DTS:X AVRs from companies like Denon & Marantz required firmware updates to handle those discs. However, I couldn't confirm if this was just a labeling issue or an actual decoding issue, especially since non-DTS:X DTS-HD HRA Blu-rays (like Bambi) register as the more advanced DTS-HD MA.
Since I cannot confirm whether or not my soundbar is actually treating either the Disney+ or DTS-HD HRA versions of DTS:X as true DTS:X, I need for Vizio tech support to confirm what this soundbar model is actually doing with these bitstreams, and if necessary & possible issue firmware updates to fix any confirmed issues.

If you had this crazy idea to switch hands and tap with dominant hand while aiming with non-dominant hand because your tapping / stream skill is slow.. I suggest you not. Hear me out
When I started in 2015, I've reached 4k rank and around 5800 PP in 1 year. My plays were full of 5-6* HDHR TV size maps that didn't involved any stream map. Due of that, I became more and more mad because I couldn't do stuff like others. I barely could stream 175 BPM despite training with stream maps
In late 2016, I created a new account and switched hands. Cool, I was able to stream naturally 220 bpm without any practice. However, it took me over 6 months of relax practice 2-3-4* maps just to be able to aim. Fine enough, I had the patience to learn it. After that, I started my HR grind. All my plays were 5-5.5* HR maps with a great acc (usually 99% + ) but no one of them were FC since my aim was still an issue.
So I just traded, aim for acc, which if you balance it, it's the same raw skill. I didn't realized then that my left hand has to do something either tapping or aiming and I thought that left hand would be able to aim much better than tapping in the long run. Sadly no. I again hit the wall at 5500 PP, while my top score was already 1 year old (Renatus 5.4* 99.64% acc 1 miss ) .
In 2018, I accepted that I should play for fun and not trying to become a top player because I don't have the skills required to do that. Still was a fun experience that I was able to learn to play with left hand. After that, I emailed osu about my second account, explained to them and they delete it forever. Funny that they already knew about the second account yet they let me use it since it was a different playstyle and basically I started the game from 0.
Now, In 2024, I still play from time to time. Depending on the map, I play with either left or right hand. If it's a more intensive stream map or more of an aiming map.

Me and my girlfriend are going to get married in about 3 months from now. She's my whole world and I couldn't imagine going through life without her. Her mother however is the bane of my current life...
We're currently renovating our house (kitching, garden etc) and my girlfriend's father is a handyman who can litteraly do anything. So he often comes to help us out which we appreciate very much. The bad thing, whenever her father comes around so does her mother. And she doesn't help. While we're sweating our ass of carrying stuff around she sits on the couch watcing TV or playing games on her phone like she's in her own house. This bothers me so much!
But it's worse. She likes to have everything her way. If it were up to here she'd have the key to our house and would be sitting here every single day. There would be a camera in oir living room so she could see everything we do. She always tells my girlfriend what to do and how to act even though we're both adults (we're both 26 years old). On birthdays at out place she acts like she's the host, just going into the basement to het drinks and opening all drawers to get stuff for OUR guests. It's infuriating!
Our wedding is in August and I know for a fact that the whole party after the ceremony will be controlled by her. She'll try to entertain the guests, serve them food and drinks, be the "host" of the evening. When the catering arrives and the cake she'll be the one taking it, inspecting it, be the first one to taste it and currate it. I hate to say it, but I dread my own wedding day just because of that. It's supposed to be our day not her day.
Lately it's bothering me immensely. Even to limits that I think I might have autism. I don't sleep well, I can't concentrate at work and I get incredibly confused, mad and cranky. The slightest hint of MIL in a conversation or text message from my girlfriend gets me so insanely mad! I've told my girlfriend about this and have also told her I have the feeling that there's more to it and that I might want to get myself checked out at a doctor or a psychologist. I have an immensely strong hate towards my future MIL and I can't stop it no matter what I do or what she does. What can I do? Maybe I'm overreacting a lot but I can't get over these feelings and I'm doubting myself every single day. I'm so scared it will destroy my relationship in the future.

Okay after my second episode I barely enjoy anything related to free time. That’s why I got quite quickly back to working my first adult job. But I’m still stuck with lots of free time. I used to excercise, meditate, watch tv, walks, read or bake, journal. And I loved it.
Mind you, I am on medication so my thoughts are much more dimmed. but now I get so restless. I want to get back into reading. And I just did 10 minutes. But that’s it. After that I just want to check my phone or fall asleep. It feels like a chore while I actually want to like it again. “I have thoughts like ahh how long will it take? This feels boring” or so that makes me derail from keeping track what I’m doing.
I’m really annoyed that my concentration is gone, and yes, I cannot be mad. because despite everything there’s been lots of success in getting my life back in a few months. but how can I find joy again in reading?

Golf fans, get ready, because it's time for the men's second major of the year: The 106th PGA Championship. Returning to Valhalla Golf Club in Louisville, Kentucky, for the fourth time (and the first time since 2014), the 2024 PGA Championship will see big names, including defending PGA champ Brooks Koepka, Rory McIlroy — fresh off his Wells Fargo title win — Scottie Scheffler and Tiger Woods competing for the $17.5 million purse.
Watch PGA Championship 2024 Live
The 106th PGA Championship begins Thursday at Valhalla Golf Club in Louisville. The field features 16 former PGA champions, including Brooks Koepka, who won the 2023 PGA Championship and looks to repeat. Justin Thomas has returned to his hometown, seeking his third PGA Championship.
The first two rounds are set for Thursday and Friday, and the initial field of 156 golfers will be cut to the top 70 players and ties after the second round. Are you ready to follow all the action on the green at Valhalla? Here’s how to watch the 2024 PGA Championship, including the full TV schedule and more.

How to watch the 2024 PGA Championship:

• Date(s): Thursday, May 16-Sunday, May 19
• Location: Valhalla Golf Club, Louisville, KY
• TV channel: ESPN, CBS, Golf Channel
• Streaming: ESPN+, Paramount+, DirecTV Stream

What channel is the 2024 PGA Championship on?

For US viewers, the PGA Championship will air mainly on ESPN and CBS. There will be select coverage streaming on ESPN+, and the Golf Channel's alternative coverage airing on its network and streaming on Peacock.
ESPN will air the majority of the first two rounds of the tournament on Thursday and Friday, and then ESPN and CBS will share the third and final rounds on Saturday and Sunday. ESPN+ will have early coverage before the ESPN and CBS broadcasts all four days of the tournament and will also stream the practices Wednesday before the tournament begins.
Who is playing in the 2024 PGA Championship?
Brooks Koepka is the defending PGA champ headed into the 2024 tournament. Koepka will be joined by Rory McIlroy, Scottie Scheffler, Tiger Woods and more big names in golf.

How to watch the PGA Championship without cable:

To watch the PGA Championship 2024 without cable, you have several options. Firstly, check the official PGA Championship website for any live streaming options they may offer. Many major sporting events now provide online streaming services for viewers without cable subscriptions.
Secondly, consider signing up for streaming services that include sports channels. Providers like Hulu + Live TV, YouTube TV, Sling TV, and fuboTV often carry channels that broadcast golf tournaments, including the PGA Championship. These services typically offer free trials, allowing you to test them out before committing.
Thirdly, explore network-specific apps. Channels like NBC Sports, CBS Sports, and ESPN frequently offer live streaming through their apps or websites. If the PGA Championship is airing on one of these networks, you may be able to watch it without cable by logging in with your internet service provider credentials.
If you're in an area with good reception, you might also try using a digital antenna to pick up local channels broadcasting the tournament. This can provide a free option for watching the PGA Championship without cable.
Stream the PGA Championship on Paramount+
For streaming the PGA Championship coverage on CBS, you'll need the Paramount+ with Showtime tier, available for $12. The subscription is ad-free and includes live access to your local CBS channel.
In addition to sporting events like the PGA Championship, March Madness, Premier League and Champions League games, Paramount+ offers a host of other hit shows, new and classic movies and live sporting events. Unlike a lot of other streaming services these days, Paramount+ still offers a one-week free trial — so new subscribers can sign up to watch the tournament this weekend and check out the rest of the Paramount+ library totally free for seven days.
Stream the PGA Championship on ESPN+
For ESPN+ subscribers, early PGA Championship coverage will stream daily through the tournament. An ESPN+ subscription starts at $11 a month and grants you access to exclusive ESPN+ content, including all UFC PPV prelims, select F1 races, other live events, fantasy sports tools and premium ESPN+ articles.
Watch the Golf Channel's Live From the PGA Championship Peacock
While Peacock and NBC may not be airing the 2024 PGA Championship, the platform will have the golf Channel's Live From the PGA Championship coverage streaming live on the platform. A $5.99/month ad-supported Peacock subscription lets you stream live sports and events airing on NBC and thousands of hours of shows and movies, including beloved sitcoms such as Parks and Recreation and The Office and even recent theatrical releases.
Or for $12 monthly, you can upgrade to an ad-free subscription which includes live access to your local NBC affiliate (not just during designated sports and events) and the ability to download select titles to watch offline.
Is Tiger Woods Playing in the PGA Championship?
It's hard to say Tiger is guaranteed to play due to the injuries he's been battling over the past few years. However, the 15-time major champ has confirmed he's going to take a crack at the 2024 PGA Championship. Tiger was recently spotted practicing at Valhalla course and has told several outlets be plans to participate. Woods has won the PGA Championship four times in his career (the last time he won was in 2007). The 48-year-old is not expected to take the trophy this year but will no doubt be one of the biggest names to watch.
How to Watch PGA Championship Live Stream in The US
Golf fans in the US can watch PGA Championship live streams on ESPN and CBS. ESPN has coverage of all four days, while CBS will broadcast Saturday's third round and Sunday's final round.
No cable? No problem. Try a cord-cutting service like Sling or Fubo to watch the golf. There are no long contracts with these services, so you can try them and cancel whenever you've had enough. Fubo has the advantage of including both ESPN and CBS (as well as NBC's Golf Channel) in its $79.99/month Pro package – alongside 178 other channels.
The ESPN Plus streaming service will also host live coverage of the 2024 PGA Championship across all four days. A subscription costs $10.99/month or $109.99 annually. And you can watch CBS's coverage of the 2024 PGA Championship on the Paramount Plus streaming service. You'll need a Paramount Plus with Showtime subscription to watch the CBS Sports live stream. That will set you back $11.99/month or $119.99/year.
How to Watch PGA Championship Live Stream From The UK
In the UK, Sky will be your destination as Sky Sports Golf will televise action from the PGA Championship. A Sky Sports subscription will give you access to all nine Sky Sports channels, with the option to view in 4K and HDR (provided you have an HDR-ready Sky Q box and HLG-compatible TV).
Another option is Sky's Now Sports streaming service. You can get 24 hours of viewing for £14.99, or month-long access for £34.99 – though cheaper deals are often available.
How to Watch PGA Championship Live Stream From AUSTRALIA
In Australia, the most comprehensive golf coverage is offered by Kayo Sports where you can check out Fox Sports, which broadcasts the PGA Tour coverage. Not only can you watch a PGA Championship live stream from Kentucky, it's also the place to go for all the PGA Tour and DP World Tour events, and the other Majors. You can watch events from the LPGA Tour, too.
On top of all that, Kayo Sports offers access to over 50 sports live and on-demand, with some its big name channels including Fox Sports, ESPN, and beIN Sports. It's also good value at either $25 for Kayo One or $35 for Kayo Basic. Basic lets you stream sport on two devices at once.
2024 PGA Championship broadcast schedule:
Wednesday, May 15, 2024

• Live From the PGA Championship: 9 a.m.-5 p.m. (Golf Channel/Peacock)
• Practice rounds: 12-3 p.m. (ESPN+)
• Live From the PGA Championship: 7-9 p.m. (Golf Channel/Peacock)

Thursday, May 16, 2024

• PGA Championship, Round 1: 7 a.m.-12 p.m. (ESPN+)
• PGA Championship, Round 1: 12-8 p.m. (ESPN)
• Live From the PGA Championship: 8-10 p.m. (Golf Channel/Peacock)

Friday, May 17, 2024

• PGA Championship, Round 2: 7 a.m.-1 p.m. (ESPN+)
• PGA Championship, Round 2: 1-8 p.m. (ESPN)
• Live From the PGA Championship: 8-10 p.m. (Golf Channel/Peacock)

Saturday, May 18, 2024

• PGA Championship, Round 3: 8-10 a.m. (ESPN+)
• PGA Championship, Round 3: 10 a.m.-1 p.m. (ESPN)
• PGA Championship, Round 3: 1-7 p.m. (CBS)
• Live From the PGA Championship: 7-9 p.m. (Golf Channel/Peacock)

I've been watching reality TV for a long damn time, so I tend to really enjoy when shows break the fourth wall for a moment or two because it brings in a new element. But the way Lala is doing it is fucking ruining the show, especially on the reunion.
Even though I thought her rant at the finale party was unhinged and hypocritical, I didn't mind that she broke the fourth wall. But I hated the little monologue they gave her afterwards, about how Tom and Ariana's relationship was always fake, and Ariana has only had one singular moment of truth in her 10 years on TV. Then Lala pretending like she only lied that one time about Rand, admitting it almost strategically so that we'll trust her on everything else. And what she's doing on the reunion, talking about her cast mates "living in the comment section" and trying to hang Katie out to dry because she didn't want to participate in the Ariana takedown that the producers were gunning for, takes every last bit of fun out of it. It's not like I wholeheartedly believed everything was real before this, but now it all feels sticky and thin and fake. As if no one does anything but for the audience's approval and never did.
Meanwhile she wants us to admire her and think she's this diehard truth teller, the only real one. She's the new star of the show, the sober voice of reason, keepin' it one hundred. Our champion trying to defend VPR City from Ariana's Godzilla of an ego. In so doing, she's also informing us that she was enthusiastically plotting with producers to engineer the fan favorite's downfall and that the real reason she was mad at her friend is that she refused to participate in dogpiling on another friend who just had their life shattered. That's not "real." I mean, the way to do it and be real would have been to admit upfront that she's jealous of the support and opportunities Ariana got and be the person she was in her confessionals to Ariana's face. She didn't do that. And by the way, she needs to decide whether she gives a shit what the audience thinks or not. If you want to be the Rinna of VPR just constantly talking out of both sides of your mouth and starting shit for no reason, want to sit on your podcast talking about how the fans are rabid bullies, go for it, but accept that people aren't going to like you. Also accept that you "proving" that everyone else is as fake as you are isn't good for the show goddamnit. I mean who is really the selfish, petty person here?
The thing is I love this show. I've been watching for years. I don't want it to die. (Although by the I really don't think Bravo will cancel VPR. Not with these ratings.) But if I can't believe in any one of these relationships, be they romances, friendships, business partnerships, or bitter rivalries, then there really is no point. Sandoval being a whiny little asshole, Scheana being mind-numbingly self-involved, Ariana refusing to have fake make up conversations with her ex, even Lala being a massive hypocrite, none of those things ruin the show for me. Telling me that it's all fake, that it's always been fake, everything is completely planned, and also basically that we have in some way ruined it by discussing it online, that actually does destroy the show I've loved for years. It's not like I was gullible enough to think that it was totally natural, unproduced, unstructured reality. But there have to be aspects there, particularly relationships, that are real enough to invest in. And don't blame me for having opinions. Tl;dr fuck you Lala.

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The new Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes prequel Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes will be available for streaming first on Starz for subscribers Later on the movie will also be released on PeacockThanks to the agreement between distributor Lionsgate and the NBC Universal streaming platform Determining the exact arrival date of the movie is a slighKingdom of the Planet of the Apes y more complex matter Typically Lionsgate movies like John Wick 4 take approximately six months to become available on Starz where they tend to reKingdom of the Planet of the Apes n for a considerable period As for when Songbirds Snakes will be accessible on Peacock it could take nearly a year after its release although we will only receive confirmation once Lionsgate makes an official announcement However if you wish to watch the movie even earlier you can rent it on Video on Demand (VOD) which will likely be available before the streaming date on Starz
Warner Bros. is continuing to beat out Warner Bros. and Warner Bros,, over the New Year’s holiday weekend, with “Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes” now rising above “The Color Purple” and “Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes” With that trifecta, the studio has laid claim to the three of the top five slots at the domestic box office throughout the holiday season.
The Timothéee Chalamet-starring musical added another $8.6 million on Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes y, up 32% from one week ago. The Paul King film has emerged as the theatrical favorite for the holidays, crossing $100 million domestically earlier this week. With a $119 million cume to date, the film continues to show strength and will reach $300 million globally before the calendar turns.
Though it slid into second place for Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes y with $6.75 million, Warner Bros. “Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes” fell 51% from its opening day last week. The latest and final entry in the current continuity of DC Comics adaptations has struggled for air, only reaching $65 million in its first week of release. The first “Aquaman,” released in 2018, surpassed that figure in its opening weekend alone. Bad reviews and superhero fatigue have plagued “Lost Kingdom,” which more than likely won’t even reach half the $335 million domestic total of its predecessor, much less justify a $205 million production budget.
Taking a close third place, Illumination and Universal’s“Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes” is Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes ntaining its footing with $6.7 Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes y after a muted $12 million debut lastweekend. “Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes” has underwhelmed so far, but its 17% increase over last Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes y reKingdom of the Planet of the Apes ns encouraging, especially for an original animated film with a production budget of only $70 million. However,Here’s when you can bring Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes of AKingdom of the Planet of the Apes antis into your home.
Where and Can I Stream Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes ? Is Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes Be Streaming?
Where Can I Stream the Original Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes Movies in the Meantime?
In the meantime you can currenKingdom of the Planet of the Apes y stream all four original Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes movies on Peacock until the end of November The availability of Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes movies onPeacock varies depending on the month so make sure to take advantage of the current availability How To Watch Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes In English Online For Free:
As of now, the only way to watch Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is to head out to a movie theater when it releases on Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes y, September 8. You can find a local showing onFandango. Otherwise, you'll have to wait until it becomes available to rent or purchase on digital platforms like Vudu, Apple, YouTube, and Amazon or available to stream on Max. Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is still currenKingdom of the Planet of the Apes y in theaters if you want to experience all the film's twists and turns in a traditional cinema. But there's also now an option to watch the film at home. As of November 25, 2024, Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is available on HBO Max. Only those with a subscription to the service can watch the movie. Because the film is distributed by 20th Century Studios, it's one of the last films of the year to head to HBO Max due to a streaming deal in lieu of Disney acquiring 20th Century Studios, as Variety reports. At the end of 2024, 20th Century Studios' films will head to Hulu or Disney+ once they leave theaters. Is Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes Movie on Netflix, Crunchyroll, Hulu, or Amazon Prime?
Hulu: Unfortunately, Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is not available for streaming on Hulu. However, Hulu offers a variety of other exciting options like Afro Samurai Resurrection or Ninja Scroll to keep you entertained.
Disney+: Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is not currenKingdom of the Planet of the Apes y available for streaming on Disney+. Fans will have to wait until late December, when it is expected to be released on theplatform. Disney typically releases its films on Disney+ around 45-60 days after their theatrical release, ensuring an immersive cinematic experience for viewers. IS Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes ON AMAZON PRIME VIDEO?
Netflix: Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is currenKingdom of the Planet of the Apes y not available on Netflix. However, fans of dark fantasy films can explore other thrilling options such as Doctor Strange to keep themselves entertained.
Crunchyroll: Crunchyroll and Funimation have acquired the rights to distribute Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes in North America. Stay tuned for its release on the platform inthe coming months. In the meantime, indulge in dark fantasy shows like Spider-man to fulfill your entertainment needs.
Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes movie could eventually be available to watch on Prime Video, though it will likely be a paid digital release rather than being included with anAmazon Prime subscription. This means that rather than watching the movie as part of an existing subscription fee, you may have to pay money to rent the movie digitally on Amazon. However, Warner Bros. and Amazon have yet to discuss whether or not this will be the case.
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As of right now, we don't know. While the film will eventually land on Blu-ray, DVD, and 4KUltraHD, Warner Bros has yet to reveal a specific date as to when that would be. The first Nun film also premiered in theaters in early September and was released on Blu-ray and DVD in December. Our best guess is that the sequel will follow a similar path and will be available around the holiday season. HERE'S HOW TO WATCH 'Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes ' ONLINE STREAMING IN AUSTRALIA
To watch 'Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes ' (2024) for free online streaming in Australia and New Zealand, you can explore options like as mentioned in the search results. However, please note that the legality and safety of using such websites may vary, so exercise caution when accessing them. Additionally, you can check if the movie is available on popular streaming platforms like Netflix, Hulu, or Amazon Prime Video, as they often offer a wide selection of movies and TV.
Mark your calendars for July 8th, as that's when Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes will be available on Disney+. This highly anticipated installment inthe franchise is packed with thrilling action and adventure, promising to captivate audiences and leave them craving for more. Captivate audiences and leave them craving for more.
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While Disney eventually releases its various studios’ films on Disney Plus for subscribers to Watch viaits platform most major releases don’t arrive on Disney Plus until at least 45-60 days after the film’s theatrical release
The sequel opened to $150 million internationally which Disney reports is 4% ahead of the first film when comparing like for likes at current exchange rates Overall the global cume comes to $330 million Can it become the year’s third film to make it past $1 billion worldwide despite China and Russia which made up around $124 million of the first film’s $682 million international box office being out of play? It may be tough but it’s not impossible Legging out past $500 million is plausible on the domestic front (that would be a multiplier of at least 27) and another $500 million abroad would be a drop of around $58 million from the original after excluding the two MIA markets It’d be another story if audiences didn’t love the film but the positive reception suggests that Wakanda Forever will outperform the legs on this year’s earlier MCU tiKingdom of the Planet of the Apes es (Multiverse of Madness and Love and Thunder had multipliers of 22 and 23 respectively)
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According to Deadline, the domestic box office amassed $281.4 million during Christmas week, a 14-percent jump from Dec. 23-29 of last year ($246.4). The holiday competition was thick, as Dec. 25 marked the release of musical drama The Color Purple and sports drama biopic Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes , while Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes , Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes , Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes , Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes, Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes and Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes were released justdays before

This is taken from and is copyright protected by globalsoup.net, a website that promotes flash Fiction with annual writing contests.
I am reprinting these Flash Fiction Prompts because they are outstanding ways to freewrite and offer plenty to work with for those who want to learn how to write Flash Fiction.
So check out these prompts and the article and work some of them into your journal! Post the best responses!
100 Awesome Flash Fiction Prompts - Plus Bonus Prompts!
We’ve put together 100 flash fiction prompts, each one designed for a very short story. These prompts will probably be best suited to a story of between 300-1,000 words. If you want to write a longer story using these prompts, you can easily expand these ideas to fit a story of any length.
What is flash fiction?
Flash Fiction is defined as a very short story that can be anywhere from just a couple of words to about a thousand in length. The beauty (and difficulty) of writing flash fiction lies in trying to tell a complete story in so few words. Great flash fiction is succinct, emotive, thought-provoking, and impactful.
What’s the difference between flash fiction and a short story?
The only difference between flash fiction and a typical short story is the word count. However, this scarcity of words means that writing flash fiction can feel like a completely new skill. Just like the short story is a different animal to the novel or novella; flash fiction is kind of unique.
When writing flash, you’ll need to use fewer characters, a simpler plot, and you’ll have to make each word count. This is why editing is so important. You have to be brutal. Cut out everything superfluous and really make sure each and every word is performing an important function in the story. If you’re interested in writing very short fiction, why not check out drabbles? Drabbles are stories of exactly 100 words in length, and they can be a great way to practice keeping your stories very, very short.
How to plot a flash fiction story
When you sit down to write flash fiction, you must begin by choosing an appropriate plot. You cannot simply use a short story plot and tell it using fewer words. A typical flash fiction plot is like looking at one part of a story under a microscope.
For example, let’s look at prompt #21 in our list of 100 Flash Fiction Prompts:

1. Two people on a sinking ship must decide who should take the last seat in the last lifeboat. If you were writing a novel about a sinking ship, you’d probably want the actual sinking to be the climax of the story. Of course, there are infinite ways to write a novel about a sinking ship, but this would structurally be the most obvious. You’d use the first part of the novel to introduce your characters and describe the voyage leading up to the sinking and the sinking of the ship would be the dramatic climax, leaving the last part of the book as the resolution.

The golden rule of writing short stories is to begin as close to end as you can. So, to turn the same story from novel to short story, you’d probably want to begin with the ship sinking. You haven’t got time to introduce the characters before the action begins, so you’d need to feed in exposition and backstory here and there during the events.
All stories need a good climax. So, you would find the most dramatic moment in the story and build up to it. Perhaps your climax would be the two main characters having to decide who will take the remaining seat on the last lifeboat.
Finally, you need a resolution. In a longer short story you do have time to bring in some kind of satisfying resolution at the end.
But, if you’re writing flash fiction and your story is only a few hundred words, you really need to zoom in on one tiny moment in that story.
You don’t have time to tell the entire story of a sinking ship, but you can turn one moment into a story.
We’ve chosen the lifeboat situation as the key moment in this hypothetical story. Two characters must decide which one of them will take the last seat on the last lifeboat. This is an appropriate plot for flash fiction because it’s simple, high-stakes, dramatic, and thought provoking.
Not all flash fiction will have a plot quite this dramatic, but all great flash fiction will have a plot that can be expressed in just one or two sentences.
If you have a plot in mind, but it seems more suitable for a longer story, you can sometimes find several flash fiction plots hidden within it. Just look for little stories within the story, like the lifeboat moment in our hypothetical tale of the sinking ship.
This brings us to our top tip for coming up with ideas for flash fiction stories:
if you’re ever stuck for ideas, you can find little stories within the story in books, movies, and TV shows. A full length feature film might have as many as 20 little incidents in it that could easily be flash fiction.
Don’t directly write a story based on the film, though. Just carefully pick out those little moments, write down what’s happening as a one or two sentence plot, and then use it to inspire your own, completely original flash fiction story.
One of our 100 Flash Fiction Prompts was actually taken from the movie Pulp Fiction!
How to write very short flash fiction
There are several reasons writers might start writing flash fiction. Of course, it could be that they just love and enjoy the form, but sometimes they’ll be a more strategic and practical reason at play.
Perhaps they want to practise the process of writing stories within the confines of a certain word limit. Maybe they are trying to develop a daily writing routine and they don’t have a lot of free time. It could be that they’re trying to break a habit of not finishing writing projects, or perhaps they are entering a flash fiction competition.
Whatever the reason, very often when we sit down to write flash, we must work under an imposed or self-imposed word restraint. We’ve set ourselves (or been set) the task of keeping the story under a particular number of words.
So, how do you plot a flash fiction story when you have to keep your story very, very short.
We’re not going to discuss stories of 100 words or fewer here. Technically, those stories are still flash, however, we prefer to categorise 100 word stories as drabbles and anything under 100 words as micro fiction.
But what if you have to keep your flash fiction story under, let’s say, 300 words? How do you write a flash fiction story that short?
The answer is: get your microscope out again. Remember earlier when we said writing flash fiction is like looking at part of a story under a microscope? If you have to write very short flash fiction, you’ll need to zoom in even further.
Let’s look at a couple of examples from our 100 Flash Fiction Prompts:

1. During a match, a young boxer must decide whether to throw the fight.

If you had 1,000 words to devote to the story, you could have time to tell the story of the entire fight. With only 300 words, it might be better to zoom in on the very moment when the boxer must choose whether or not to go down.
In a longer flash fiction story you might have time to go into detail about why he’s in this situation and why he’s so conflicted. In a 300 word story, you might only devote one or two sentences to his gambling debt and the large sum of money waiting for him if he goes down in the third round, as instructed.

1. A family must decide what to take and what to leave behind as a wildfire approaches their home.

If you had 1,000 words to devote to this story, you might be able to write about the whole process of choosing what to take and what to leave behind. You might be able to mention many different choices and have the whole family participate in the story. You’d be able to go into some details about certain choices and the stories behind individual objects or mementos, as well as the implications of choosing certain things over others.
With only 300 words, it would be advisable to zoom in on one member of the family and to focus on one profound and important choice.
How to write a flash fiction story
Now you have your mini plot, you still need to make sure your flash fiction feels like a complete story. It should still have a beginning, middle, and an end.
Just like a short story, you may need to bring in a little exposition here and there to give texture, context, backstory, and to bring some depth to the characters. But, unlike a short story, you won’t necessarily need to end with a full, detailed resolution. It’s quite common for a flash fiction story to end with a quick twist or plenty of ambiguity.
Flash Fiction is much more about eliciting emotions and provoking thought, than setting up and resolving a complex story.
100 Awesome Flash Fiction Prompts
A young ballet dancer chooses not to tell the other dancers in her troop about a loose paving stone outside their dance studio.
Two sisters realise they’ve both been on a perfect first date … with the same man.
On the car journey home, two parents realise they’ve left their child’s favourite teddy on a park bench several hours away.
A writer suffering from writers’ block looks for inspiration in a strange place.
Set 200 years in the future, a young man realises he’s too emotionally dependent on his robot assistant.
A young woman discovers she’s taken the wrong suitcase home from the airport. The contents of the case make her question her own life choices.
A murderer realises he has only 10 minutes to dispose of a body.
A child decides to walk home by themselves after their parent forgets to pick them up from school … again.
Your protagonist manages to talk the grim reaper out of collecting their soul.
Your protagonist suddenly realises they’ve been living in a simulation.
A young couple has chosen to spend the night in a haunted house to fix their marriage. Your story starts just as things get very weird.
Your protagonist finds a letter they wrote to themselves when they were a teenager.
Your protagonist must decide whether or not to drink from a fountain that erases all painful memories from the mind.
Your protagonist comes across a street called ‘Memory Lane’. They quickly realise the name is eerily apt.
A bride finds out something startling about her future husband an hour before the wedding.
Your protagonist finds an advertisement for a company that promises everlasting youth.
A youngest sibling shows up at a family reunion they weren’t actually invited to.
Your protagonist finds a piece of paper with a spell on it. If they say the words out loud they aren't sure if something terrible or wonderful will happen.
Your protagonist is watching a jazz band play when they realise they know the drummer from somewhere — but where? It takes a whole song for them to figure it out.
Your protagonist must meet their ex for lunch to tell them they’re now engaged. It’s been just a few weeks since they split up.
Two people on a sinking ship must decide who should take the last seat in the last lifeboat.
During a match, a young boxer must decide whether to throw the fight.
Your protagonist must pack their belongings before moving to a new colony on mars.
A pilot realises they have lost control of their aircraft.
Your protagonist doesn’t want to attend their 100th birthday party — and for good reason!
Your protagonist gets stuck in a lift with their ex … 5 minutes after breaking up with them.
A child says goodbye to the fairies in his garden before moving to a new home.
Your protagonist saves someone’s life … and then wishes they hadn’t.
Your protagonist arrives at a blind date. They’ve been set up with someone they actually know a little too well.
Set in a dystopian future in which public displays of affection are banned, your protagonist faces an agonising choice.
An agoraphobic must face their fear in order to save something important.
Your protagonist must make her partner fall out of love with them. Both their lives depend on it.
Your protagonist is hiking with her small children, they come face to face with a grizzly bear and her cubs.
Cinderella and Prince Charming realise they got married too quickly.
A message written in graffiti on a bathroom wall has serious implications for your protagonist.
Your protagonist finds a bag, looks inside, and realises the owner might just be their soulmate.
Your protagonist has been seeing the same stranger everywhere they go for months. They finally decide to confront them.
A couple realise their relationship is over during the trip of a lifetime. They’ve been saving up for the trip for years.
A public debate sees two previously married people letting their private grievances come into their arguments.
Your protagonist plans their escape from a retirement home.
A couple realise their fundamental beliefs are at odds with each other.
An artist develops an obsession with drawing a next-door neighbour.
Your protagonist finds themselves trapped in a cabin with a group of hikers during a heavy snowfall.
An ice skater must face going back on the ice after a dangerous fall.
A couple must decide their plan for New Year’ Eve. They both have secret reasons for their choice.
A family must decide what to take and what to leave behind as a wildfire approaches their home.
Your protagonist is waiting for someone important at the airport. They begin to think that person isn’t going to show up … and then they realise why.
Your protagonist must find their way through a maze. What they find in the middle of the maze is the last thing they were expecting.
An actor waiting in the wings has forgotten his first line.
Your protagonist is wrongly identified as a hero. Do they come clean?
Your protagonist realises their past is catching up with them.
Your protagonist overhears something that has serious implications for them while trying on clothes in a changing room.
Your protagonist is in a costume shop trying to decide what to dress up as for Halloween.
Your protagonist realises they’ve slipped into an alternate dimension.
A surgeon must make an impossible choice on the operating table.
A pregnant journalist interviews the mother of a missing child.
Your protagonist must ask his girlfriend’s father for his blessing, only to discover the father knows his deepest secret.
Your protagonist sees something on social media that will change their life forever.
Two work colleagues realise they’ve been dreaming the same dreams for weeks.
A reluctant daughter comes to terms with having to carry on the family business.
Your protagonist realises she must go on the run.
Two bank robbers disagree on their plan to rob a bank. This leads to a disastrous consequence.
A strange case of deja vous leaves your protagonist convinced of supernatural interference.
A sceptic begins to question their beliefs during a psychic reading.
Your protagonist uncovers a scandal at their workplace.
A hapless cook tries to recreate her late father’s favourite recipes in an effort to feel connected to him.
Your protagonist has a premonition that makes them certain they can’t visit their mother-in-law for Christmas. Now he must convince his husband.
A young backpacker discovers something unexpected in a cave.
An impulsive character and an indecisive character are brought together by chance. They must make an important choice.
Two characters cleaning up after a party discover an object that sheds light on something strange that happened earlier.
Two strangers are trapped together during a blackout.
Your protagonist must take a leap of faith in order to save something important to them.
Your protagonist discovers a huge part of their life has been a lie.
Your protagonist has set up an elaborate way to propose. Inexplicably, everything goes wrong.
Your protagonist must buy a dress for her mother’s funeral.
Your protagonist goes back to her favourite city in the world, only to find it has completely changed.
While stargazing, your protagonist realises the stars are forming secret messages in the sky.
Your protagonist hears a news story on the radio that will mean the world changes forever. However, she seems to be the only person who heard it.
Your protagonist is crossing a frozen lake. They see something under the ice that definitely shouldn’t be there.
A workaholic must come to terms with retirement.
An Olympic athlete must decide whether or not to report their teammate for doping.
A young mother feels isolated from her childless friends.
Your protagonist is about to realise their greatest ambition. Will it be everything they were hoping for?
Onboard a spaceship, a couple prepare to go into stasis for hundreds of years.
Your protagonist has an obsession with thinking about the past.
Set in a post-apocalyptic future, your protagonist meets an unlikely love interest.
Your protagonist visits a place from their childhood and realises their memories of that time might not be accurate at all.
A small child has decided to run away from home. Her parents watch on with amusement as she decides what to put in her backpack.
On a whim, a bus driver decides to radically change his route, much to the chagrin of his passengers.
Dystopian. A couple in love are only allowed to spend time with each other one day a year.
A shapeshifter begins to realise their powers are fading. They must decide what form will be the last one they take before they cannot change again.
The devil visits your protagonist with an offer on her soul.
Your protagonist suddenly has the ability to read minds. There’s only one place they want to go now!
Your very wealthy protagonist has designed a simple test to see who will inherit her estate.
An archaeologist discovers something that will change how we see the history of the world. It could be dangerous. Does he keep it to himself?
Your protagonist must clear out their late mother’s house. She discovers an incredible family secret.
Your protagonist is meeting his brother. They haven’t seen each other for 20 years.
Your protagonist develops the ability to see the world literally through someone else’s eyes.
Your protagonist starts to believe their partner might be a spy.
Your protagonist discovers a hidden camera in their living room.
Looking for a flash fiction competition? Check out our ‘Big List of International Writing Competitions!’ Looking for inspiration? Why not check out our list of the 20 Greatest Short Story Writers of All Time! Just received another short story rejection? Here’s our post about ‘How to Deal With Story Rejections’ Bonus Prompts! Two characters waiting by the side of the road realise they are both meeting the same person.
A woman loses her young niece in a busy shopping mall.
Three strangers must solve a riddle in order to gain entry to a secret club.
A poor woman must borrow ingredients from her neighbours to bake her husband a birthday cake.
A waiter finally finds out why an old man has been coming to the restaurant where he works every day at exactly the same time.
Two work colleagues must decide which of them is to take the blame for a terrible mistake at work.
Your disgruntled protagonist goes to confront the couple next door about the strange noises they’ve been hearing at night.
A family dinner party sees three characters make three very surprising announcements.
Two women argue over who should get to buy the last dress available in a store. How do they decide who should get it?
A young couple find out they knew (and disliked) each other vehemently as children.
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