At a concert/meetup in SG in 2019, a fan handed out fanmade matte-finish PVC cards (they feel like credit cards) for BTS and they were gorgeous. I still have them safely tucked away in a binder. One of my favourite pieces of fanmade merch.
For an upcoming concert, I plan to do something similar and distribute pretty PVC cards as freebies. If people have recommendations for custom-printed (customising both the back and front for each card) PVC card services based in North America, I’d be very, very appreciative.
(I’m basically looking for something like moo.com but for PVC instead of paper.)
If people have any other suggestions too, I’d be happy to take them.
Thank you very much!

PRC FAQs - https://www.prc.gov.ph/prc-frequently-asked-questions
Congratulations on your Oath taking ceremony! Next agenda is your initial registration with the PRC.

Disclaimer

This post is based on my personal experience and thus, your mileage may vary.

How to register online?

1. Sign in to your LERIS (https://online.prc.gov.ph/) account.
2. Go to `Select Transaction`
3. Select the `Initial Registration` tab.
4. Input your profession and application number (from NOA).
5. Choose a PRC venue (don't forget to scroll down the list).
6. Choose your preferred schedule.
7. Arrive at the selected venue at least 30 minutes before your actual appointment time since you still have to fall in line.

What are the requirements for initial registration?

1. Printed Oath form
2. Two (2) passport size pictures in white background and full name tag
3. Two (2) documentary stamps - This is available in the PRC branch, though availability may vary.
4. Community Tax Certificate or *Cedula* - you can get this from your city/municipality hall.

How much is the registration fee for successful examinees?

The fees for initial registration are as follows:
For examinations requiring baccalaureate degrees:

Initial registration fee - ₱600.00
Annual renewal fee - ₱450.00
Total ₱1,050.00

How long does it take for a professional to claim the Certificate of Registration (COR) and Professional Identification Card (PIC)?

• Actual lengths may vary per branch, but in my experience, the PIC will be released on the same day after completion of the initial registration.
  
• COR will be released within a month after initial registration, your PRC branch will provide a contact number and email address for follow-up and updates.
  

What is the procedure if a registrant was not able to attend the scheduled mass oath taking?

A registrant who cannot or has failed to attend the scheduled mass oath taking may request for a special/individual oath taking to the Board concerned. The request must cite the reasons for his/her failure to attend the mass oath taking.

• Basically, you need to register and complete the E-oathtaking via LERIS first.

Are Professional Identification Cards subject to expiration?

Professional Identification Cards have a validity period of three (3) years for all professions and are renewable during the birth month of the professional.

Additional tips:

1. It's prudent to make digital backups of your important documents, there are printing services within the vicinity of PRC branches and it'll save you the hassle of returning home and fetching your documents if you forget to bring them.
2. Documentary stamps prices vary depending on where you buy them ranging from ₱30 to ₱50.

Posts/Inquiries about the initial registration should be posted in this thread, posts in the TNPLE subreddit that violates the subreddit rules will be removed. Thank you.

I live in nyc and am always finding birds that need help. I normally bring them to a local rescue but this one in particular just seemed like she needed a little TLC so I decided to keep her for a few days since she’s also very docile and sweet. I found her on Friday, May 10th so she’s been with me for 5 days.
She was found huddled against a building in a high traffic area. She was being bothered by a much larger pigeon (male wanting to mate?) and her feet were completely entangled in human hair. Some toes were tied together and I was worried for her feet which actually look great now. She was starving and luckily since I like to feed local flocks, had plenty of dove seed mix to start feeding her. That’s when I realized she is a teenager and honks for food and slightly wiggles her wings.
She doesn’t run away when approached, preens herself while being held, puffs up and sleeps on/near me and just all around seems in great spirits. She honks loudly when the food bag comes out and goes crazy for peas and corn. Her poops look great and looks like miniature human poop now- brown logs and moist. Unlike on day one where her poops were mostly only white and green. She basically spends her day waking up, drinking water, eating, preening, pooping and napping on repeat.
Despite seeming like a healthy, rested, docile teenager- the weird thing is she really doesn’t want to walk around and explore. Maybe three feet away max? She also has zero interest in flying. She will flap her wings and attempt a soft landing when I gently ‘toss’ her a foot above something for practice but that’s it.
One of my small local flocks is in a peaceful park and after a few days of rest, I brought her there. Called the flock with seed and let her walk around with them to eat. Still- no attempt to fly away. After a few minutes, a male started chasing so I scooped her up and brought her home.
I’m at a loss because obviously I’ve fallen in love and I just not want to release her once I’m positive she’s a strong flyer and able to escape danger.
Any and all advice is greatly appreciated and if there are any pigeon lovers out there local to NYC that would love to keep her as a pet, I’d love to connect. I’d keep her but I have cats. :(

No matter your ethnic background—be it White, Chinese, African American, or any other—if you're a fan of Chinese cuisine, I'd love your input! Please help me on my journey and take this quick and fun 6 question survey! Also, feel free to dm me if you are curious about my venture!
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfIbVXfKBIJSpsIUWCn-7xAr0mtMrZdSpvGPsJMiRdg9YeOoA/viewform

Wow, just finished KoD & it felt like RJ was back to his best after the supposed 'slog'! What a book, what a finish! From the start where Galad kills the rapist Eamon Valda to continuous action in the last 200 pages, this was a nice return to form after the slow CoT.
Some thoughts:
1) I am a bit sad that this is the end of the RJ books. He created this world & its sad that he wasn't able to finish his magnum opus. Even though I'm sure Sanderson would have done a pretty good job, I wish RJ was able to finish this before he died!
2) "The Golden Crane flies for Tarmon Gai'don" - Literal goosebumps. The best part was when Weilin Aldragoran realises that he is actually crying after hearing Nynaeve's speech! Wow!
3) Should Rand let Min go? He lost his hand shielding her and it was a situation where she wasn't needed at all given that she couldn't channel. And the whole way to that Manor, everyone was saying it was a trap. Why take Min when you can't even trust yourself/LTT with saidin?
4) I used to dislike Faile with a passion but she was a real one for promising to save the other captives even if she escapes.
5) Fuck Masema, man. What a cunt..It was sad to see Aram radicalized. All he needed was an arm around the shoulder but Perrin kept ignoring it.
6) I know she is Black Ajah, was one of Rand's torturers/kidnappers, left Faile & her troops to die in Malden but I felt real sad at the way things ended for Galina. I think death would have been better than being a slave to Therava for the rest of her life with zero chance of escape.
7) Was Mat-Tuon the best romance in the series? I did feel so, even though Rand-Aviendha was very well done. When Furyk Karede tells Tuon that Mat really loves her, it was an amazing moment.
8) On Karede, what a guy. Showing him & Tylee Khirgan helping the good guys was a great way of showing that Seanchan aren't totally bad guys. They are just normal folks with some weird/archaic practices.
9) So, I guess Moiraine will be back. Has Cadsuane replaced her as Rand's advisor? This will be interesting to see.
10) Speaking of Rand, what's going to happen with him is really exciting. The taint is gone but there is no question in my mind that he looks insane to others. He can't weild saidin properly, is becoming too cold/hard. Seeing this Rand vs the sheepherder Rand in the early books is a contrast.

I have this book available immediately in original publisher pdf form for $7.
https://drive.google.com/file/d/12OLYJ67ngy8jWh4BcXSumOvaRfn7VIHo/view?usp=sharing
I offer a book-finding service for $7 for the first book and $3 for each additional book in the same transaction, as long as I have them, so if there are any others, I will do them cheaply if I can find them Upon your agreement that you will pay the $7, I will create a sample that includes the cover up to the first page of chapter 1, and then pages 100, 200, 300, 400, and 500. You can then pay via PayPal, Venmo, Cash App, Wise, or debit/credit card.
Upon payment, I will provide you with the book in a permanent Google Drive folder.
Just contact me if interested.

Here is an idea I had for my medieval fantasy world. I’ve been thinking about this one for a while. A while back I was thinking about the longterm practicality of a pirate republic. The advice I got said the most successful pirates are those who have a functioning nation to work under.
The island of Liora may be a free place where there are no feudal lords. A place to get away from the likes of kings and clergy. In more recent years it has become a safe haven for criminal organizations and other convicts. People often half jokingly called a Pirate Republic.
Although it is a free place some amount of order would arise. That came in the form of a race called Jetrin who are basically giant clams. Just like clams they have a foot they can use to move but being too big to move on their own is generally considered beautiful. So they are heavily reliant on the other races for day to day care. I kind of wanted them to be like hutts without being giant slugs.
The Jetrin families run all sorts of businesses all over the world. Slavery, prostitution, smuggling, racketeering. You name they probably operate something similar to it somewhere. If not in Liora then maybe in a foreign nation. They usually invest that money in various mercenary companies and hired thugs.
What do you all think? Can a large organization like this really exist? Would clam crimelords be intimidating? Can you imagine a council of clam crimelords? Could these crimelords really hold onto their power in Liora? Did I miss something that may be vital to the defense of the island.
I heard of some pretty scary stuff regarding organized crime. One of which being a very generous pension plan but even this seems huge.

This is my first time posting so I’m sorry if it doesn’t make much sense or I’m trauma dumping a lot also a couple trigger warnings, I’m not sure where to start off with. Me and my mom used to be pretty close I’d say up until I started high school. Middle of eighth grade I moved to a new city so I was back to trying to find some friends. I’ve been moving around since I could remember, I used to live in Germany where I moved twice, then moved to the US around the Silicon Valley, moved again, and again and again now we’re here. I wouldn’t be explaining this part of my life if I felt like it didn’t have any weight in this situation. Middle school I found a friend, me and her got pretty close, stuck through Covid together. My mom hated her and not even two years into our friendship my mom started accusing her of stealing from us, being a bad influence and overall just being trashy. Her parents were in the middle of getting a divorce and she had a lot of things going on in her life. I dyed my hair red during this time too while being friends with her, she probably was a huge influence on me but that’s also because it was covid and I was bored and who doesn’t start irrationally bleaching and coloring their hair at 14. I think my mom thought she was a bad influence on that part too because she's the one that first started off coloring her hair like purple and pink etc. My mom never of course said anything to my friend but she made sure I would hear of her disapproval concerning her bad influence in my life. I stopped being friends with her freshman year since my parents banned me from having her over or going to her house, I couldn’t drive neither could she and hanging out at each other's houses was pretty much what we did 80% of the time. I was so frustrated and felt trapped because the only friend I really cared about was someone I wasn’t allowed to associate with anymore. I told her I was done being friends with her over text and blamed it on me just being in a dark place and breaking it off. She was confused and called me a week later about something personal but I just dismissed it. Granted there were other things going on in our friendship but I felt terrible about it especially since her parents were going through that divorce and I just left during such a sensitive time. I hate to admit it but I felt so much better since I started making new friends quickly and started sitting with a new group the next day. Mostly guys and other two girls, it worked out fine for the next year. Junior year my grades started dropping so my parents got stricter, started taking my phone, looking through it, screen time etc. I felt like it was a huge invasion of privacy since my mom would look through my texts. Me and my mom also started arguing weekly about whatever it was but when I mean arguing I mean like full on yelling for two hours down in the living room with no stopping. I can’t do anything about it because whenever I say something remotely disproving her so called “facts'' since she always speaks with so much authority on subjects she wouldn’t even know about I’m the one that has to quiet down from my fathers perspective, and I know this will be mostly about my mom but me and my dad have always been close even when we’re fighting within a week we at least make it up. We play the same sports, have the same humor etc. I understand this might look like us disregarding my mom and I know she cares and loves me yet in certain circumstances she doesn’t show it so of course there’s going to be reasons as to why I’m closer with my dad than her. For example I was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes in 4th grade and of course I wouldn’t expect anyone to know that when you're low you need carbs or when your blood sugar is high you need insulin but my mom to this day still does not understand it. I wouldn’t care even if it’s my friend but as my mom you take so much authority over my life and who I can’t or can hangout with but you don’t know the basics of how I have to manage my life behind closed doors in the house that you and I live in every day. That might sound overdramatic but it’s just something I think about. Also growing up, I’m an only child by the way, I would always play by myself whenever we went on vacation for example to the beach etc. it was always my dad that came and played with me in the sand while at sharing his time with me and my mom so my mom wouldn’t gets upset over him leaving her to go play with me. Even now I notice how my mom would always make snarky comments regarding how my dad always treats me like a princess and cares too much over me. Anywho, since I know this is getting pretty long I’ll try to sum it up a bit more. I started liking one of the guys from that group, I would text him on a daily basis just about whatever. We were pretty awkward in person since I’ve never really talked to that many guys and I don’t think he really had much experience either so we stuck it to mostly phones, everyone else in the group also didn’t know. Once my mom went through my phone on one occasion that night, because she would collect it on some nights and read through my messages in bed she saw one message from that guy calling my mom bipolar and me responding with something like it’s fine like I still love her she freaked out. She told me to never talk to him again and that I’m a brat for talking about my family issues outside of the family etc. I honestly had nobody to talk to. The other two girls in the group didn’t really talk to me at this time, I later became really close with one of them though more on that later and I had no other friends in that town so it was really only him. He had a plethora of family issues that I couldn’t even imagine so I felt like he understood where I was coming from at times better than other kids with American parents. Not sure I mentioned but my parents were both born in Eastern Europe and grew up during heavy communism so that definitely affected them and their parenting style. Anywho, my mom sent me a paragraph to show to him, basically telling him to never talk to me again and that he has to apologize to her etc. After a couple months I think he took me out on a date. I'm not sure what to make of it since it was pretty casual. We just got ice cream. I told my parents that he was only picking me up so we could meet with the rest of the group when of course we’re not. The rest of the guys saw us downtown and found out about it. That kinda really sucked since I’m pretty sure one of them liked me so he got really mad and it kind of ruined the group dynamic. The guy I liked stopped talking to me a couple months in since I couldn’t really do much or go anywhere and dating as a result would be hard so he stopped really talking to me it was pretty off and on since I would get mad stop texting him and then he would try to get back texting at me and once I showed him I cared he’d stop. I was so mad at him and the situation that I refrained myself from talking to him, two weeks later he killed himself. I found out because one of the guys from the group faced me and told me. I went downstairs and started crying and formed the sentences explaining it the best I could, pushing a couple words out at a time. In that very moment I felt so hurt and vulnerable by what just happened my mom responded by just looking at me and saying that he had it coming for him since he probably vaped and drank. My dad ran downstairs since he probably heard me crying and the first thing he did without asking me any questions was hug me. For the first time ever he told my mom to shut up since her trying to ask me questions about how he died just made me sob harder. Over the next week my mom was pretty lenient about letting me go out. The next week she started asking what happened to him. Me and my mom were not close at all anymore at this time. You see mothers and daughters talking about guys or what dress they’re gonna wear to the prom etc in the movies. Me and my mom are not like that. On top of that I was overwhelmed with what happened and as someone does overthinking how things could have played out differently. Anyway I refused to tell her anything saying I was too uncomfortable and over the course of the next couple months of senior year she would get progressively mad and irritated at me to the point of arguing and yelling at me for not trusting her and telling her how he killed himself. I to this day told her nothing but she stopped asking. I don’t know how my dad feeds into this since he’s always so Switzerland about everything when I know I’m right in an argument between me and my mom, however when my mom has leverage he takes her side. Anyway, the beginning of senior year was rough. I hated being in that house and really started seriously considering the only options I felt like I had at the time. I started becoming closer to that one girl from the group earlier, spoiler alert my mom strongly dislikes her now too since she’s a liar and since she’s close with her mom but not her dad that means her parents are having marital issues and therefore her mom is a cheater etc. I don’t understand how she goes from one topic to another and sorts these things into her head. She’s my only friend that I’m really close with and I have been for the past these almost two so hearing this is very disheartening since I’m sending off senior year and I can’t do this again being so close to the end of the year. I forgot to mention but during homecoming I drank for the first time and I had one of my guy friends with his girlfriend and that friend that I’m not friends with drop me off. When he dropped me off he didn’t wave to my mom so she now thinks he’s a bastard in her words and disgusting and she deserves and apology for all the times he’s been over to my house etc. which I honestly think is insane because how do you always have so many issues over my friends and why are you so obsessed with 16 year olds, like you really have beef with high school kids as a 50 year old. Anyway the reason I bring that up is because I invited him over a couple weeks ago for some drills to help one of my other friends with mma since me and him used to wrestle and my mom got mad despite him not being there for me but for my other friends benefit. I’m not sure if this makes any sense. I'm trying to explain the issue best I can without saying too much. Anyway my friend, the one that I’m friends with now, the girl and that guy from the group that didn’t wave at my mom are both Latin so my mom started calling them cheaters and dirty etc when they had nothing to do with anything. This argument spiraled over me asking my mom if I can have a sleepover with those friends since we want to bring a new series on Netflix. Also during prom I asked my parents for 10 dollars since I already had twenty in my account and I wanted to buy hair stuff for prom. They gave me the 10 and I said how I was going to catch a ride with friend A so that when friend A picked me up but friend B that I did not mention in the plan picked me up my parents started calling and texting me. To give some background friend B has been close with me since freshman year, probably the only friend my mom has liked and also the only white friend I have not sure if that has anything do with it but there’s that. She’s really sweet and has been invited over multiple times to my house by my parents, they do really like her. Anywho yet since I didn’t mention that friend B was driving the car since my parents didn’t recognize the new car and knew it wasn’t friend A driving yet assumed it was indeed friend B but since I didn’t mention that they took all the money I had in my account which was only 30 dollars but it was what I needed to get my nails and hair gloss and hair spray for prom, I just started breaking down in the middle of target. I was so excited to get my stick on nails etc since I couldn’t afford to get the acrylics since I was paying for all my prom stuff for the most part. By the way I know that the 10 dollars was initially there so I understand taking away that but the other 20 I made selling my clothes on mercari and I had nothing else like no other cash nothing that was the money I worked on to get my prom stuff. It was mostly my dad actually that got mad at this point taking my money etc and than following a got a text from my mom saying I got what I was coming for by acting the way I have been. There were 3 others with me while I was at target so having three of my friends see me breakdown from me only having 14 cents left in my account was so humiliating. I ended up looking great at prom neither less so don’t even worry about that, my hair looked great and I found some old stick-ons in my laundry room and painted them white lol a couple of them popped off during prom but whatever. This has been really long and thanks to whoever spent their time reading through all of this I’m sorry if the read is a bit of a struggle but I just don’t know what to think or do of this situation. Keep in mind I’m 18 now, never have had a boyfriend, never have do anything, kissed, even held hands romantically etc. it’s one thing you know to not care about any of that but the thing is I do and I want to experience being a teenager and going out and going on dates and not worry about my mom flipping out on one of my friends. While we were in Italy one of the tour guys told her to move on the bus to make more room for others and she started cussing him out telling him to f himself etc for telling her a paying customer where to sit. Everyone started staring at us. I did not want to be there. I just kept my head down the entire time and didn’t really talk to my mom out of embarrassment for the next two days. Also after that prom incident I wasn’t allowed to go anywhere after as a result of go to friend B's birthday bash the next day so my mom texted her without my knowledge and told her not to tell me about how I’ve been acting up and one day I’ll learn when I’m her age but it will be too late and that I don’t know what I’m doing and finishing off my apologizing on my part for my behavior and I’m the reason why I can’t go to her party. Which I find so infuriating because one of the main reasons why I don’t tell my mom anything about my personal life is because I simply don’t want her to have that control of knowing what my life is like, I probably tell the teacher I TA for more than my own biological mother. The fact that she preached family issues in the family so heavily and that you should never talk about issues to others yet goes behind my back and tells my friend that my indecent behavior is the reason why I can’t go is so beyond me because where did your ideals go that you preached so heavily about. Every time I’m around my mom especially when she has her flares of anger I just start shaking like you know when you drink something with a lot of caffeine in the morning and you don’t eat anything so mid way through the day you just start getting jittery and anxious, kind of like that. Ok I think I’m done anyway thank you for tuning in cause I really have to start studying for human geo, thanks for reading up until here 🙂.

Bonjour les antitaffeurs,
Un ami essaie de reprendre des études. Il est en emploi depuis plus de cinq ans, dans la même boîte où il a eu son premier taff. Il essaie de négocier une rupture conventionnelle avec son directeur, qui au début semblait partant, pour un départ de l'entreprise mi-juin.
Le hic, c'est que ce même patron est finalement venu lui dire "en fait non, pas sûr, parce que j'aimerais voir si je peux négocier la somme à vous verser pour la rupture conventionnelle" (en gros ya toutes ses heures supp et ses congés payés + une indemnité de rupture conventionnelle, c'est cette dernière que le directeur veut tirer vers le bas). Mon ami s'en fout de l'argent, tout ce qu'il veut c'est son droit au chômage le temps de reprendre un cursus en septembre. Et surtout il veut son été pour pouvoir en profiter, depuis ses 18 ans il voit tous ses potes profiter de juillet et août et lui, il en chie à son travail.
Le plus drôle dans l'histoire c'est que l'indemnité en question, c'est 3500 balles. Mon pote m'a littéralement dit "la semaine dernière il a mis plus dans une balayeuse automatique". Le total de ce que le directeur lui doit c'est autour de 5-6000 euros. Le surmulot en 4 dimensions.
Je rajoute aussi que mon pote est le seul gars de la logistique qui maintient la boîte, sans lui l'entreprise s'éclate au sol alors qu'elle tente de doubler sa structure. Il est rémunéré à peine au dessus du SMIC pour plus de cinq ans d'ancienneté dans la boîte, dont deux ans à ce poste. Édit ; le CA de la boite ça parle en millions au cas où.
En gros aujourd'hui, le directeur doit lui donner sa réponse définitive. Mon pote a décidé que si ça lui convient pas, il tend sa démission directement (quitte à pas toucher le chômage). Perso je lui ai dis de faire carrément un abandon de poste, parce que pour moi le gars veut juste le faire trainer dans la boite le plus longtemps possible pour avoir le temps de le remplacer et qu'il forme un remplaçant. Et vu comment il est traité, je vois pas pourquoi il leur ferait la faveur de rester son mois de préavis.
Bref, qu'est ce que vous conseilleriez à mon pote de faire ?

So me and my boyfriend at the start of our relationship would basically doing it like rabbits. Alllllll the time but as time has gone on and some life getting in the way we don’t do it as much as we used to. We’d do it everyday multiple times a day sometimes and now we only do it maybe every other day for the past couple months. I think the longest we have gone without is like almost a week or in his words 4 times in 2 weeks. He thinks he’s on his way to a dead bedroom but I keep telling him at the start of our relationship the amount of sex we were having was kinda ridiculous. Not that I had a problem but we’ve kind of settled into our routine. I think we have leveled out into a normal sex life like any other couple but he thinks doing it less than 3-4 days out of the week a couple times a day is depriving him of a happy sex life. I told him that any woman would not actually be able to keep up with that for a lifetime and that it was unrealistic. All couples go at it like crazy in the honeymoon phase and sex usually levels out after a while. He thinks I’m withholding, which I will say his persistence and pressure and complaining around the fact that we don’t dedicate so much time to being sexual anymore is kind of a turn off at time and he’s gotten so used to getting it all the time that he doesn’t really attempt foreplay anymore. I continue to tell him this but he completely disregards it and says he’s not doing anything different from before and that I’m trying to change him. If I can’t get him to see what he’s doing wrong I don’t see our situation changing and I’m not the type of woman to lay down and take it so oh well but I’m stuck at trying to get him to see what the problem is on his part. It’s unrealistic to continue having the amount of sex we had at the beginning AND he’s gotten so used to doing it all the time that his foreplay has become completely lackluster and such a turnoff. Like sure you may can get it up in 10 seconds but what the hell would make you think I’d be ready in that time? It’s like his man brain can’t even compute and it’s becoming so frustrating and putting us in a negative feedback loop.

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSezykL-oD2OMUOV0eJuB_iyi2E58uAG4zmsvsuwytIyQtEZOQ/formResponse
ALL RESPONSES WITHIN 2:30 RECORDED ANSWER ASAP WE ARE DOING THESIS AND FINAL DEFENSE AT THE SAME DAY IDCCCCCCCCC

Hello guys!!
I've been on TRT for 3 months right now, Endo prescribed Sust. 250 every three weeks (I know, it's a bad protocol) , before taking T I found few experiences with this preparation and I decided to share with you guys my experience in case someone is interested.
My journey started on february 9th, I saw my endo because I was tired of looking childish and feminine. I have diminished male characteristics such as very low muscle mass, thin body and thin facial hair, almost a high pitched voice, lack of morning erections, and sexual desire... In addition I had very low energy to the point that I couldn't do my job and I was like drunk all day, a history of low mood, low focus and because of that I lost a year of my PhD. :(
bloodwork was done, T was borderline low (300 ng/dL) and prolactine sky high (30 ng/mL) so I was definitely diagnosed with secondary hypogonadism and a pituitary adenoma.
Later I took my first injection, 250 mg... at first I didn't notice anything, didn't feel anything. A week after I started to noticed that vellus started to grow on the back of my hands where I never had, also I started to grow it on my chest and the bottom part of my stomach. Strangely I also started to lose weight, I still don't know why... two weeks and facial vellus became barely noticeable on my chin, neck and sideburns...
A month an a half I didn't notice any improvement, it felt like I was stuck so dosage was modified to 250 mL every two weeks. By the end of the second week my T was at 400 ng/dL, hematocrit and hemoglobin raised to the upper normal limit (54.7% and 17.9 ng/dL), still I didn't experience any symptoms. I was super disappointed. After that, I saw a rapid change but it became paused again... those changes were a subtly reconsitution of my body, slightly more strength (I couldn't carry a bucket of water, and then I could easier) . my shoulders became wider and my body trunk took a little form of a triangle, again, changes were subtle and not dramatic... mood improved, focus not so much. Eerections waked me up at night, they were harder and firmer, sexual desire didn't change dramatically, I was only 30% more interested in sex than before.
Two months and hair extended to my down part of my belly to my belly button, facial hair became thicker but not so much. For curiosity I decided to get my T tested immediately after an injection, levels came at 2150 ng/dL, even with higher levels, changes stopped again I only noticed that my chest muscles where thicker and with more definition. Erections stayed normal but sexual desire became 20% better. Hair stopped growing or probably growing slower.
Two months and a half to this day I can't see any changes again, literally nothing... I got tested again at the middle of the frequency of my injections and T levels were 765 ng/dL... two days later and for curiosity (again) got tested and levels came at 509 ng/dL... prolactin fell to 15.1 ng/mL, glucose was normal, creatinine increased to 1.07 mg/dL...
two weeks ago I started to take proviron, small hair follicles started to appear and my mood improved again but that was all.. Currently I don't know what to expect, I feel like I'm stuck again but I'm continuing my treatment... let's see how it turns out.
In conclusion, changes have been subtle... the more noticeable ones where on the body and facial hair growth (mediocrely tho), small body reconstitution and a slighlty increment in stength ( at least I can carry a bucket of water now hahaha). Pauses between changes are absolutely noticeable...
End.
I hope my story is useful, I'll be happy to answer any questions.

I’m a trans bisexual male. Me and my crush of 8 YEARS, went to the same school till year 8. We don’t go to the same hs but I see him online and around the neighbourhood. I always have sudden urges to see him again or hit him up. bc I have dreams or daydreams about about us. And seeing him again would put these emotions away.
I was about 8-9 years old when I met him. Over the past 8 years I’ve been with other people, I’ve liked other people. But my mind is always brought back to him. I’ve never liked someone for so long and wanted somebody this desperately. And it wasn’t like we had a close friendship, we were just classmates in most situations. The first 2 years my feelings for him were strong, and he knew I liked him since my friends would tell him. Whenever he’d ask tho I’d say no. I had a feeling he did like me back at some point but we never got anywhere bc I’d always run away like an idiot.
I saw him just two days ago taking a run (he lives just down the road from me.) he looked EXACTLY the same and I’ll be real, I stopped just to watch his back run off down the road. He’s always running around the neighbourhood bc he’s a sports freak. A soccer addict guy. I went and searched him up on Insta on my alt acc. (All he posts is soccer.) The urge to dm him on my main account, just to talk or to hangout with him is rising slowly. But I’m hesitating.
Why do I think I even have a chance with this dude. Why do I think he’d even want to talk or hang out. Our friend groups are so different and he’s probably busy all the time. He’s probably not even gay or bi or ANYTHING, and yet there’s this small sliver of hope that he’ll like me back even if I’m a guy now. Since he’s never dated anyone, atleast not that I know of…maybe he likes a girl, I think about that all the time. If I STAYED a girl would he like me back? Nope. Before I came out transgender I was the most masculine girl around. but I don’t feel jealous or mad, knowing he probably likes girls. The only emotion I feel rn for him is need. Even if he just wants to be friends I’m fine with that, I crave him in my life after so much years of wanting him.
How the heck do I start up a conversation with him tho? I’m thinking of all the worst things that will happen. Do I just say “hi do u remember me, we use to go to school together. Oh yea and also I’m a guy now..” DO YK HOW AWKWARD THAT IS. (ik that’s basically what I have to say) I’m stupid for still liking this guy who probably doesn’t even think about me anymore bro.
How do I tell him I’ve been thinking about him, that I still miss him, he’ll be weirded out and I’ll look like an idiot. Telling him I still miss him after just complete nothingness between us after so long. Do I just ask him “do u want to hangout?” I’m the last thing he’d even care about. He’d rather date a soccer ball then an actual human. If I told my friends about him they’d just tell me “there’s nothing special about this guy all he does is play soccer?” AND I KNOW THAT. But he was my first gay crush. What do I do I’m an idiot.

(continuation of part 1)

III. Searching for Aerith Beyond FFVII

There were absolutely no answers in *Remake* or OG (at this point in my research, *Rebirth* wasn’t released yet), no matter how much I looked; nothing at all hinted at how Cloud could’ve obtained the memories of OG that emerge in *Remake* as MOTFs. I knew I had to look elsewhere to search for more clues, so I decided to check every piece of media ever released by SE with a mention of Cloud or Aerith in it, digging for hints in the compilation and beyond.
And boy, did I find them.
III. a) Core Worlds and Suspension Worlds
There are a couple of general *FF* rules that we need to establish before going forward.
It’s important to note that there are multiple realms in which the FF stories take place, each with a different name, history and society. This ensures that all FF stories occur separately, never intercepting or interacting— though they do have creatures like moogles and chocobos in common, as well as concepts like airships, gil, magic and some form of crystal. For simplicity, I will refer to these separate worlds in which the numbered FF games (FFI, FFII, FFIII, etc) occur as “core worlds”.
Characters from different core worlds may appear together in non-numbered *FF* games, the events of which have no impact on the core world at all: it seems that sometime after a *FF* character has reached the end of their core world’s plot-line, they may somehow be summoned to far-removed realms where they will face new adventures. I call these far-removed realms “suspension worlds”. One example of a *FF* game that takes place in a suspension world is *Dissidia Final Fantasy*, wherein characters from multiple core worlds unite to accomplish a mission as a team.
III. b) Final Fantasy Tactics
First on our list of non-compilation SE games to explore is 1997’s *Final Fantasy Tactics* (*FFT*), a game whose plot takes place in the suspension world of Ivalice. Let’s plot out the relevant events, and then analyze!
III. b) i. Fact-Finding
The main character of *FFT*, Ramza, encounters a brunette flower peddler with Aerith’s iconic, gravity-defying bangs:
\"Aeris\" in FFT's Ivalice
If you choose to buy a flower from her, she express her relief: apparently, business isn’t going well because no one is interested in flowers. The girl wistfully dreams aloud:

“When is my knight in shining armor going to take me away from here...?”

Later, Ramza and his companions encounter a mysterious machine that can summon people from across universes. The machine is activated, and a rather rude young man with spiky blonde hair appears. Cloud claims he used to be in SOLDIER, and says the last thing he remembers is “getting stuck in the current”. He looks to be disoriented and lost, and suffers from piercing headaches. Mere moments after being summoned to Ivalice, Cloud rambles:

“What’s this? My fingers are tingling… My eyes… they’re burning… Stop… stop it [Se]phiroth…”

He dashes out of the room, but not without announcing:

“I must go… must go to that place…”

Outside, Cloud encounters the brunette flower girl Ramza met earlier. She offers Cloud a flower, but he only stares at her wordlessly:

“Flower girl: Buy a flower? Only 1 gil.
Cloud: …
Flower girl: Something wrong? Do I resemble someone?”
Cloud: No… it’s nothing.”

As soon as Cloud leaves, a gang of ruffians surround the flower girl and start harassing her, demanding payment that’s apparently overdue. One of them finally calls her by her name: “Aeris”. He grabs her, insinuating that he might sexually assault her in lieu of payment. Aeris is not strong enough to push him away. That’s when Cloud returns:

“Cloud: Get your hand off her!
Thug: What did you say!?
Cloud: Didn't you hear me? Get your dirty hand off her!
[…]
Cloud, to Aeris: Go… now.”

Aeris heeds Cloud’s advice, fleeing the scene before a fight between Cloud and the thug can break out. After Cloud scares the ruffians off with the help of Ramza and his companions, he speaks once more:

“I lost… something very important… Ever since, I’ve been lost […]. What should I do? What about this pain [?] Must go… to the Promised Land.”

III. b) ii. Fact Analysis
There’s a lot to unpack here, all of which you probably clocked in your head upon reading, but let’s put it down in writing.
While *FFT* Cloud’s memory is far from perfect, the Aeris he encounters in Ivalice doesn’t recognize him at all. *FFVII Ultimania Omega* addresses this question without answering it:

“[The flower seller’s] name is Aeris, and she has the same appearance and tone of voice as the Aeris of FFVII. However, when she comes across Cloud, she does not recognize him. Could she really be the same Aerith who appears in FFVII but with memory loss, or is she a completely different character?” (“#4 Proof of Omega”, “FFVII in Other Games”, “Final Fantasy Tactics”, page 560).

Regardless of her unknown identity and inability to recognize Cloud, FFT Aeris’ fantasy of a “knight in shining armor” is quite reminiscent of the flower girl/bodyguard dynamic we’ve come to know and love. Cloud’s armor doesn’t shine, but in my opinion, if you’re looking for the dystopian, corporatocratic equivalent of a knight, you can’t get much closer than a supposed-former-SOLDIER-turned-bodyguard. Additionally, despite his rude and cold attitude toward Ramza’s gang, the urgency with which Cloud swoops in to save the flower girl from the ruffians betrays a softer, warmer side to him: the flower girl/bodyguard dynamic strikes again!
*FFT* Cloud’s dialogue borrows two lines from the speech OG Cloud makes as Aerith lies dead in his arms (disk 1, chapter 28): “My fingers are tingling. My mouth is dry. My eyes are burning!” and “What are we supposed to do? What about my pain?” You might’ve noticed that this glimpse of grief Cloud experiences in *FFT* bears a resemblance to the fourth MOTF 4 experienced by *Remake* Cloud (see section “II. a)”). Could it be that *FFT* Cloud and *Remake* Cloud have something in common?
Shortly after being summoned to Ivalice, *FFT* Cloud declares that he must go to “that place”, a mysterious line that is later elucidated when he tells Ramza that he must go to the Promised Land and find the “very important” thing he’s lost. The Promised Land is the Cetra culture’s afterlife, meaning *FFT* Cloud is looking for someone who’s died, someone “very important” to him. OG suggests this is none other than Aerith:

“Cait Sith, reading Cloud’s fortune: You will find [what] you pursue. However, you will lose the most precious thing” (disk 1, chapter 16, English translation by Kotaku’s “Let’s Mosey: A Slow Translation of Final Fantasy Seven: Part Eight” by Tim Rogers, 9:42-9:52).
“Cloud, after seeing Aerith’s hand reach for him through the Lifestream: … I think I'm beginning to understand.
Tifa: What?
Cloud: An answer from the Planet… the Promised Land... I think I can meet her... there” (disk 3, chapter 3).

Finally, let’s try to understand where on the OG timeline Cloud was summoned to this suspension world from and what he remembers. His comment about getting stuck in a current has to be about the Lifestream; apparently, on top of its atemporal nature, it can act as a conduit to other worlds. One only enters the Lifestream if they’ve somehow fallen into the core of the planet or once they’ve passed away and returned to the planet. Both scenarios merit consideration.
On the one hand, it’s possible that Cloud was summoned to Ivalice after he and Tifa fall into the core of the planet: this point in the FFVII OG timeline occurs after Aerith’s death and shortly before Cloud finds out he was never SOLDIER, which matches the gaps in FFT Cloud’s memory quite well. However, this scenario does not account for the vagueness with which FFT Cloud remembers Aerith and her death. Most importantly, Cloud’s realization that he can find Aerith in the Promised Land occurs much later in the game (FFVII OG, disk 3, chapter 3) than when he falls into the Lifestream with Tifa (FFVII OG, disk 2, chapter 8).
On the other hand, FFT Cloud’s vague yet persistent memories of Aerith suggest that he’s been summoned to Ivalice after his eventual death post-OG, but also that he’s lost quite a large portion of his memories. His incomplete memory loss is likely the result of Cloud’s individuality’s erosion by the Lifestream after death, which we discussed in section “II. a) ii.”. We can therefore surmise that by the time he is summoned to Ivalice from the Lifestream, Cloud has been dead for long enough that the Lifestream eroded a large portion of the memories of his lifetime. This post-death scenario is likelier than the first. The memory of Cloud’s realization that he was never SOLDIER must be gone, which explains why he claims otherwise upon being summoned to Ivalice. Contrastingly, vestiges of Cloud’s OG memories of Aerith cling to his soul, even after others have been wiped clean. Could this be a consequence of their soulmate bond? Could the strength of Cloud’s love and grief for Aerith have made his memories of her stronger and more difficult for the Lifestream to erode? Could it be both?
One thing is clear: Aerith is of fundamental importance to Cloud, even when he can’t quite remember her. In fact, the only other character he remembers and/or mentions in *FTT* is Sephiroth. It does make sense that the memories of those who have marked one’s soul forevermore would be the most difficult for the Lifestream to erode.
III. c) Dissidia Final Fantasy
The next stop on our travels through suspension worlds is 2008’s Dissidia Final Fantasy! Now strap in, because here’s where things get really serious.
III. c) i. Fact Finding
In the suspension world of *Dissidia Final Fantasy* (*DFF*), the goddess of harmony Cosmos and the god of discord Chaos are engaged in a never-ending cycle of conflict. Both deities need warriors to fight on their behalf, so they recruit core world characters into their respective teams by summoning them to *DFF*. Some of these summoned characters are *FFIV*’s Cecil, *FFVI*’s Terra, *FFVII*’s Sephiroth, *FFX*’s Tidus, and of course, *FFVII*’s Cloud. The warriors find themselves in the suspension world of *DFF* with no memories of their core worlds’ plotlines. However, as the *DFF* adventure progresses, they are able to recover pieces of their memories here and there. It isn’t clear how much they come to remember. Ultimately, the warriors hope to return home to their core worlds by fighting in this war and seeing to its end.
Cloud is summoned to *DFF* as a warrior on the side of Chaos, who seeks to destroy all existence. Sephiroth is also on Chaos’ side, meaning the two are teammates despite being enemies in their core world of *FFVII*. It just so happens that Tifa is a summoned warrior in *DFF* too, though she’s fighting on Cosmos’ side. Intrigued by her vague familiarity, Sephiroth hypothesizes that killing Tifa will bring back his memories of OG’s plot line: before long, the masamune wielder finds Tifa alone and corners her into a one-on-one fight. Thankfully, Cloud swoops in and saves her before Sephiroth can do any harm. Tifa is thankful for Cloud’s help, though confused that Cloud would elect to assist her and turn against a fellow warrior of Chaos; she doesn’t remember what Sephiroth and Cloud mean to each other in OG. In fact, Tifa doesn’t even remember Cloud’s name or that they share a core world, though Cloud feels somewhat familiar to her. For his part, Cloud at least remembers that Tifa is someone he cares about from his core world. As Tifa thanks Cloud for saving her from Sephiroth, something she says elicits an odd reaction from the warrior of Chaos:

“Tifa: The way you showed up and fought that guy off. It was a pretty cool thing to watch. You were like a hero, charging in to save the girl.
Cloud gasps at her words. She doesn’t notice” (Dissidia 012: Treachery of the Gods, report 5: “Unexpected Fulfillment 2”).

On another note, Cloud knows he will have to fight Tifa once the Cosmos-Chaos conflict comes to a head, as they are on opposing teams. He thinks to himself:

“Once [her] memories return, [she]’ll lose the will to fight just like I have. So... Before that can happen, I have to act...” (Dissidia 012: Treachery of the Gods, report 5: “Unexpected Fulfillment 2”).

In order to end the cycle of the conflict and to avoid fighting Tifa, Cloud decides to try and defeat Chaos himself. Predictably, Cloud is no match for the deity. As he dies, Cloud pleads the following to the goddess Cosmos:

“Cosmos, goddess of harmony. If you can hear me, listen to my plea. I beg you. Save her. Save my friend… Tifa.”

Cosmos hears him and responds immediately:

“Cosmos: An end to this conflict, and a life spared? This is your heart's desire? If your will remains unchanged, I shall bring you here when the battle draws to a close. Cloud. My chosen" (Dissidia 0.13: Treachery of the Gods, report 7: “Unexpected Fulfillment 3”).

Cloud’s wish is granted by Cosmos: the first phase of the conflict ends without Tifa getting hurt, and she is sent away from the suspension world of DFF before the second phase begins. Cloud is saved from death, and Cosmos enlists him into her team of warriors for phase two: this time, Cloud is fighting on the good side.
Now we enter phase two of the war. Cosmos tells her team of ten core world warriors that in order to save the world from Chaos’ destruction, they must collect what she describes as crystals containing the power to persist through darkness. I call these the “*DFF* crystals”. There are ten *DFF* crystals in total: one for every warrior on Cosmos’ group to find. To obtain their crystal, each hero must overcome a trial that will confront them with whatever personal struggle they faced in their core world; if they prove themselves worthy, their *DFF* crystal will appear to them. On one hand, some warriors’ *DFF* crystals simply take the form the crystals found in their core world. For example, Onion Knight’s *DFF* crystal looks to be nothing more than one of *FFIII*’s elemental crystals, which hold little to no personal significance to him. On the other hand, some warriors’ *DFF* crystals symbolize something more personal to their respective warriors. For instance, Cecil’s *DFF* crystal looks to be one of *FFIV*’s dark crystals, which specifically represent the dichotomy of light and darkness he struggles with in his core world’s plot-line. Cosmos describes the quest for the *DFF* crystals as follows:

“Cosmos: The crystals embody the strength to face despair. With ten gathered, there is hope yet to save the world. The path to your crystal will be perilous... and different for each and every one of you. But you must believe in and follow your own path. Even if you know not where that path leads" (Dissidia 013: Light to All, prologue: “A Final Hope”).

From this exposition, simply keep in mind that: Cloud must find his crystal by overcoming a personal trial, and his crystal may have the appearance of an object in OG that’s important to him.
Once the team is debriefed on their mission, Cloud remains reticent to fight; he doesn’t much like the mysterious nature of this conflict. Not knowing exactly what they’re all fighting for is clearly bothersome to the swordsman, and the idea of thoughtlessly engaging in battles leaves a bad taste in his mouth. Fellow warrior Firion understands that without a reason to fight, Cloud’s heart just isn’t in it. He imparts upon Cloud that he must have a dream he’s fighting to protect, something he wants to see come true, to motivate him to stop Chaos from destroying all existence. Unfortunately, Cloud doesn’t have a dream to preserve, or can’t find one for himself:

“Cloud: I've looked, but I'm still empty-handed. And without a dream, what do you suppose I should do? […] Maybe what I'm looking for... isn't here” (Dissidia 0.13: Light to All, chapter 1: “Beyond Doubt”, “Gateway of Good and Evil”).

Another fellow warrior, Cecil, expresses worry for Cloud, whose response evokes the main theme of FFVII OG:

“Cecil: Everyone's worried, Cloud. But... Do you shoulder a larger concern?
Cloud: Concern... Maybe a sense of loss" (Dissidia 0.13: Light to All, chapter 1: “Beyond Doubt”, “Beyond the Continent”).

Whatever Cloud is looking for “isn’t [there]”, and he feels “a sense of loss”: Cloud’s motivating dream has been lost to him. This is later reasserted in a conversation with Terra, another warrior of Cosmos:

“Terra: And you, Cloud... What's your dream?
Cloud: I've lost mine" (Dissidia 0.13: Light to All, chapter 3: “The Chosen Battle”, “Gateway of True Intent”).

Later, Cloud encounters and fights Sephiroth, who is still a part of Chaos’ team. Sephiroth is defeated, but not before he’s taunted Cloud with his habitual puppet talk. However, Cloud remains strong and refutes Sephiroth’s manipulation, asserting that only he can determine his own path. This must’ve been Cloud’s personal trial, because his crystal appears at that very moment: it is a small, light green orb that looks like materia from his core world. Having pocketed his crystal, Cloud decides he must find his own reason to fight. Interestingly, his search is depicted as intertwined with Fate:

“Cloud: Even if I have my doubts... I have to find my own answer […] Until then, I'll keep fighting.
Narration: The warrior has vowed to keep fighting— and keep fighting he will […]. Etched in destiny, his quest for answers continues on” (Dissidia 0.13: Light to All, chapter 1: “Beyond Doubt”, “Gulg Gateway”).

Later, the nemeses meet again in a segment called “Recurring Tragedy”. Their interactions here are particularly interesting. Sephiroth speaks of making Cloud suffer through despair and pain as though referencing their history together: 

"Sephiroth: This disease called hope is eating you alive. The world of suffering was born out of such half-baked ideals.
Cloud: If that's the case, I have to endure the suffering. There's no moving on if I run from it.
Sephiroth: If that is what you wish for, you shall drown in the pain. I'll lead you to true despair. [My] shadow is burned into your heart. We'll meet again, Cloud. I'll keep coming back— as long as you are who you are."
Sephiroth disappears. Cloud looks out into the distance before the scene ends.
“Cloud: No thanks. The one I really want to meet is…” (Dissidia 013: Light to All, epilogue: “Conclusion of a Cycle”, “Recurring Tragedy”).

This final line suggests Cloud has finally found a reason to fight: he wants to meet someone unspecified.
Finally, after the war has ended, we arrive at the final cutscene of *DFF*. I will let you read the full script, with notes added by me **in bold** behind the spoiler censors. Please do not read my notes if you do not wish to encounter spoilers for *FFI*, *FFII, FFIII, FFIV, FFV, FFVI, FFVIII, FFIX or FFX*:

“[The] heroes are all standing together in a grassy field with a forest behind them. Birds are chirping, the sun is shining brightly, and the wind is blowing gently. The heroes look around them in awe. They're all holding their crystals.
WoL: The battle has come to an end...
Tidus notices that his crystal has begun to emanate a blue glow.>! His crystal is a movie sphere from his core world of FFX**: a capsule containing sounds and images that people record for later viewing. Tidus’ crystal likely represents the specific movie sphere recorded by his love interest Yuna, which revealed that she’d loved him from the beginning**.!<
Tidus: Gotta go, huh...
The blue glow transfers to him as well. He turns to look at the others
[…] Tidus grins at the others, then turns and runs toward a nearby lake. He leaps into it in a manner reminiscent of [the events] of FFX. He vanishes as he descends toward the lake.
Zidane: We're not vanishing. We're returning—
Zidane is sitting on a tree limb as he says this. His crystal begins to glow gold, as does he. His crystal is shaped like a highly important ‘progenitor of all life’ crystal from his core world of FFIX**.**
Zidane: — to where we're supposed to be.
Zidane spins around the tree limb with the use of his tail and launches toward the sun. He's lost to view.
A white feather then drifts down from that direction and Squall catches it. The feather is reminiscent of his love Rinoa Heartilly, whose character symbol is a white feather. In fact, Squall’s crystal looks like a mix of his revolver gunblade from FFVIII and Rinoa’s feather motif. [Squall glows blue.]
Squall: Perhaps we can go on a mission together again.
Squall vanishes.
Cloud is then visible, standing in [a] flower field. The flowers are white and yellow. Cloud has his crystal, a light green materia from his core world of FFVII**, in hand.**
Cloud: [(Chuckles shortly, like a scoff)] Not interested.
Cloud walks off into the flower field, gaining a green glow. He vanishes.
A snowflake then falls into Terra's right hand as her crystal begins to glow pink. The flames drawn on her crystal represent her power, which is connected to the element of fire: her character arc in FFVI**.**
Terra: I think I've learned how to keep going. Thank you— and take care.
Terra glows pink and then vanishes. Bartz throws a stick. He's glowing pink as well.
Bartz: When you're having the most fun, that's when time always flies. His crystal is the Adamantite from his core world of FFV**.**
Bartz vanishes.
Cecil: It's mine to pass on—
A moon appears behind Cecil and goes through its phases as he begins to glow blue. His crystal has shadowed and illuminated parts, representing the duality of his character, which is central to his personal arc in his core world of FFIV**. It also represents his brother Golbez, who has chosen the darkness. Cecil considers his familial bond with Golbez his guiding light and hopes to be with him someday**.
Cecil: — this strength I've gained from everyone.
Cecil vanishes.
Onion Knight hugs his crystal and looks up toward the sky. His crystal is shaped like those found in his core world of FFIII.
Onion Knight: Everyone... thank you!
OK briefly glows blue and then vanishes.
There are wild roses at Firion's feet. He and WoL are looking toward the sky. WoL suddenly begins walking away while Firion looks down and sees the roses.
Firion: This isn't the end. Another dream is waiting to begin.
His crystal is the color of the wild roses that were at the center of his dream and of his motivation to fight Chaos. The roses are also the emblem of the Rebel Army he was a part of in his core world of FFII. His crystal is shaped like Pandaemonium, the final dungeon of his core world story. Firion gains a violet glow and then vanishes.
WoL is walking through the field and then comes to a stop. He's looking at something.
WoL: May the light forever shine upon us.”

As you can see, everyone’s crystal is very important to the story of their core world, and in the cases of at least Tidus, Squall, Terra and Cecil, the crystals represent something very personal. What about Cloud and his crystal, then? What about the dream he lost and the person he wants to meet? Let’s begin analyzing to answer these questions.
III. c) ii. Fact Analysis
Firstly, it’s clear to me that the Cloud that appears in *DFF* is a post-OG Cloud, given how many plot points from OG he interacts with. I’m reticent to say whether or not this post-OG Cloud is dead like in *FFT*, as he recovers many of his memories of OG during *DFF* and there is no evidence of him having passed away and joined the Lifestream.
The second thing I’d like to point out is Cloud’s strange reaction when Tifa compared him to a hero who swoops in and saves the girl from the bad guy. Cloud gasps, indicating that her words mean something to him; the trope Tifa references must therefore be included somewhere in the *FFVII* OG plot-line. Some of you are surely ahead of me by now, having realized that only the tragic antithesis of this trope appears in OG: Cloud is unable to save Aerith from Sephiroth (disk 1, chapter 28). Whether or not *DFF* Cloud remembers Aerith herself at this point, it’s clear he recalls the pain and guilt of losing Aerith to Sephiroth.
Next, let’s address Cloud’s lost dream: to meet an unspecified person. It seems Cloud is aware at this point that in OG, he was eternally separated from the person he dreams of meeting. So, who was he separated from in his core world? Who can he never meet again, even if his team of warriors defeat Chaos and Cloud returns to the realm of *FFVII*? There are a few options —his mother, his father, Zack, Jessie, Biggs, Wedge, and any other person he knew who died—, but the sheer narrative weight that Aerith’s untimely death carries makes it clear who he truly wants to meet. This is corroborated by Cloud’s “I think I can meet her… there” line in OG (disk 3 chapter 3), by *FFT* Cloud’s search for Aerith during his appearance in Ivalice, and by Cloud’s strange reaction to Tifa’s comparing him to a hero who swoops in and saves the girl from the bad guy. All the available evidence suggests that Cloud’s dream is indeed to reunite with Aerith, and that this dream is “lost” to him because she was killed by Sephiroth (disk 1, chapter 28). This would also explain the title of the *DFF* segment “Recurring Tragedy”, since as we all know, the ultimate tragedy of *FFVII* OG is Aerith’s death. Considering Sephiroth was the one to take Aerith away from Cloud, Sephiroth’s threats of drowning him in despair in “Recurring Tragedy” only solidify this interpretation of Cloud’s lost dream.
Finally, we arrive at the ending cutscene. Cosmos’ warriors return to where they belong to try and accomplish whatever dream they held as motivation during the Cosmos-Chaos conflict, each carrying their *DFF* crystal. Cloud is shown standing in a field of white and yellow flowers and walking deeper into it with a light green materia in hand. Why was a white and yellow flower field chosen to represent *DFF* Cloud’s dream? The answer is obvious. White and yellow flowers symbolize Aerith: she sold Cloud a yellow blossom upon first meeting him in OG (disk 1, chapter 1), and her yellow and white flowerbed cushioned Cloud’s fall when the two reunited in the Sector 5 church (disk 1, chapter 4). What’s more, we have the [iconic credits video of the original cut of *Advent Children*](https://youtu.be/PqJ8Y8Nd9KE?si=O\_QolO-iNsDmZWR6) to refer to, wherein Cloud is seen driving near flower fields. Aerith stands there (3:20), seemingly waiting for him. Here’s what Nomura had to say about this credits scene:

"[...] we filmed the video for the ending credits in Hawaii. There are fields of flowers on both sides of the road, and the colors —yellow and white— are the same as the flowers in Aerith's church […]. With Aerith, 'flowers' have been her image throughout the series” (FFVII Reunion Files, “Countdown to Reunion”, “Stories from CG Production”, page 87).

Even in the Advent Children Complete cut of the film, where Aerith is not shown standing in the field, the flowers and their symbolism of Aerith remain. That being so, it’s more than fair to say that the white and yellow flowers in DFF’s ending cutscene serve as yet another confirmation that Cloud’s dream is to be with Aerith.
With all of this established, we can address the nature of Cloud’s *DFF* crystal. As we established, every core world has its own version of a crystal, each possessing a distinct appearance, function and meaning. Materia are the crystals of *FFVII*, so one could be satisfied by the proposition that Cloud’s *DFF* crystal is simply meant to represent a random materia. However, I think Cloud’s crystal is specifically the White Materia, as it represents Aerith’s sacrifice, her importance to the plot and what she died fighting for. If any one object symbolizes her death, it’s the White Materia; it’s even given closeups during the [event](https://youtu.be/Wx3duFYCcho?si=Zg332l6dMLwpZMF2&t=150) (2:33-3:02). Besides, unlike any other materia in *FFVII*, the White Materia is known to glow a light green when Holy has been activated:

“Bugenhagen: If [the prayer] reaches the planet, the White Materia will begin to glow a pale green” (FFVII OG, disk 2, chapter 15).

Here are pictures of the materia so you can compare for yourself:
https://preview.redd.it/0qtumfeyfq0d1.jpg?width=386&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3995f010738c83fca0c5842a0564d0a9ad206dfd
https://preview.redd.it/0kj525tzfq0d1.jpg?width=1144&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=575573ef1d2c937635cf569d4a376886a24b384c
Cloud's DFF Crystal
Cloud’s DFF crystal
So far, in both suspension world games we’ve examined (*FFT* and *DFF*), Cloud is searching for Aerith. As a final note on *DFF*, it may interest you to know that codirector of the *Remake* trilogy Toriyama was actually a writer for *DFF*: he may have carried some themes from *DFF* to *Remake*…
III. d) Detour: The Final Fantasy 30th Anniversary Farewell Exposition
Before we hop onto the next suspension world, let’s return to ours for a quick detour: the 2018 *Final Fantasy* 30th Anniversary Expo. Themed with farewells and tragedy, this expo showcased the heartbreaking goodbyes featured in different *FF* games. Artwork, clips, quotes and images aplenty here! As the highly anticipated *Remake* was going to be coming out approximately a year and a half later, the *FFVII* section of the expo featured a few sneak peek *Remake* designs. This means the expo was at least partly curated with the *Remake* trilogy in mind; there could be interesting material in the *FFVII* section of the expo related to *Remake*. Let’s dive in!
Unsurprisingly, the focus of the *FFVII* section is Cloud and Aerith, since she is the loved one he lost in OG. Zack is also given a mention, however Aerith was the glaringly central star of the show. To showcase how important Aerith’s farewell in particular was to the expo, the *FFVII* portion was introduced by a photo of Cloud lowering Aerith into her watery grave and a video of her tragic death:
Final Fantasy 30th Anniversary Farewell Exposition, FFVII Introduction
The description under the video screen reads:

“She was gone in the blink of an eye. But the pain never went away.
Aerith awoke the ultimate magic to protect the planet and the people she loved. Yet her life came to a sudden end at the hands of Sephiroth, a man bent on seeing the world destroyed. Even the usually stoic Cloud couldn’t hide his grief at the unexpected death of an irreplaceable companion. ‘My fingers are tingling. My mouth is dry. My eyes are burning.’ True words, revealing Cloud’s deep sorrow” (Final Fantasy 30th Anniversary Exposition).

Conveniently enough for us, the expo’s tagline is “Who is the person you want to meet again?” Given that Aerith holds the spotlight in the FFVII section of the expo, it’s clear who SE is telling us Cloud wants to reunite with. Recall Cloud’s unfinished line in DFF: “The one I really want to meet is..." (Dissidia 013: Light to All, epilogue: “Conclusion of a Cycle”, “Recurring Tragedy”). We theorized that he must be referring to Aerith, and now, we are certain.
The expo also had pamphlet descriptions of the farewells depicted. Here is the general summary of *FFVII*‘s farewell story according to that pamphlet:

“The story follows the lead character Cloud, but it is the heroine, Aerith, who opens Cloud’s eyes and helps bring him closer to understanding the mystery that is his past. Through her, we draw closer to the truth of the story.
This scene, in which the heroine Aerith is lost, is easily the most shocking and tragic in the story. No one expected to say goodbye to such a major character in the middle of the story. Rumors of a secret way to revive Aerith spread, and it was clear players were having a hard time saying goodbye to her too. Even now, twenty years later, it still feels like a shocking turn of events” (Final Fantasy 30th Anniversary Exposition Pamphlet, page 36).

It’s interesting that SE would mention the rumors of Aerith’s revival circulated by players back in 1997, especially as fans were awaiting Remake’s release…
In light of everything we’ve analyzed so far, it can be said that between *FFT* (1997) and this farewell expo (2018), SE has consistently demonstrated that reuniting with Aerith is post-OG Cloud’s goal. That’s a period of over two decades— two decades of wishing, seeking, longing in real-world time for this character. This is a huge long-term commitment for SE to make, and you can bet the devs don’t take it lightly. Again and again, once the events of the OG game have ended, Cloud is shown to desire a reunion with Aerith. This ever-present and ever-insistent theme will become very important to us later in this post.

I have this book available immediately in original publisher pdf form for $7.
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1aPEsr-xN3FYb16iR6Ob4e8b68gXijlZ9/view?usp=sharing
I offer a book-finding service for $7 for the first book and $3 for each additional book in the same transaction, as long as I have them, so if there are any others, I will do them cheaply if I can find them Upon your agreement that you will pay the $7, I will create a sample that includes the cover up to the first page of chapter 1, and then pages 100, 200, 300, 400, and 500. You can then pay via PayPal, Venmo, Cash App, Wise, or debit/credit card.
Upon payment, I will provide you with the book in a permanent Google Drive folder.
Just contact me if interested.

Daily Dose of Integrity
A new client of mine is going through what I call “the transition phase”, where you move from a dishonest life to an honest one, and you have to dismantle the old life by telling everyone the truth and revealing the secrets you've been keeping and so on.
I won't share the personal details, but he came clean with someone about a pretty big secret, and that person reacted badly. It was the kind of reaction we're all afraid is going to happen, the one which creates the catastrophic fear that keeps us dishonest.
This other person went and told everybody, and tried to smear his name and turn people against him in a vengeful and spiteful counterattack(his truth-telling also involved rejecting this person and cutting them from his life).
We jumped on an emergency call, and he asked, How do I deal with this?
Well obviously the best way to deal with this is to prevent this problem by telling everybody your secrets first, so if someone else does it no one will be shocked and the person trying to cancel you will just look pathetic.
But if you haven't done that already, the key here is just don't defend yourself. Just admit to the parts that are true. Give only the bare basics of your side of the story. Don't try to convince anyone of what’s true - let them decide for themselves.
You can say, “Look, I’ll tell you what I know, and you can make up your own mind about what’s true.”
Just be the bigger man, remaining calm and rational. Show the other person is being petty and they are not revealing anything you’re unwilling to share yourself.
If you’re committed to long-term honesty, then you can truthfully say, “I was planning on telling you about this when my courage was up to it, but this other person has disrespected my wishes to do so in my own time. It’s a shame because you and I could have connected deeply if they’d let me be the one to tell you first.”
We all have our demons. We’ve all done terrible things we’re ashamed of. People are often going to be quite compassionate about your human flaws… provided you are unapologetic, non-defensive, and willing to admit to them.

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSezykL-oD2OMUOV0eJuB_iyi2E58uAG4zmsvsuwytIyQtEZOQ/formResponse ALL RESPONSES WITHIN 2:30 RECORDED ANSWER ASAP WE ARE DOING THESIS AND FINAL DEFENSE AT THE SAME DAY IDCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC

Nicely formatted web version here: https://wienwasgeht.beehiiv.com/p/best-things-to-do-in-vienna-may

🇦🇹 Wochenende 16.5 - 19.5

Thur:🌤️20° Fr: 🌧️18° Sat:☀️23° Sun:🌤️23° 🇬🇧 Scroll down for English👇

🤌 Laurin’s Picks

Die Woche mit ein paar extra Veranstaltungen für alle, die den Sonntagabend auch nutzen möchten! 🙂

1/ Thursday Special: Free Live Concert (Thur 19h - Free)

Am Donnerstag gibt es wieder mal ein Konzert in der Superbude! Dieses mal gibt es ‘James Choice’ zu hören. Hier kann man reinhören. Vermutlich werde ich auch dort sein, also wenn mich wer sieht, sagt hallo, würde mich freuen! 🙂
Alternativ eröffnet auch der ‘Sky Garden’ mit Afterwork Drinks und einem super Blick über die Stadt!

2/ Flohmarkt Karmelitamarkt (Thur-Fr 08-20h - Free)

Neben den vielfältigen und exklusiven Sonderangeboten der ansässigen Fachgeschäfte und den Privaten Ausstellern, werden vor allem Künstler mit besonderen Einzelstücken das Herz aller Sammler und Kunstliebhabern höher schlagen lassen.

3/ International Documentary Film Festival (Thur-Sun - €9)

Ab Donnerstag beginnt das Internationale Documentary Film Festival in Wien! Die Säle des Votiv und De France Kinos werden wieder zum Zentrum der dokumentarischen Filmkunst und des ethnographischen Filmschaffens.
Vielleicht gut geeignet für den verregneten Freitag? 🌧️

4/ Asian & Austrian street food and culture festival (Fr-Sun 10-22h - Free)

Eine Mischung aus Kultur und street food festival mit Fokus auf asiatische und österreichische Kultur und Küche. Klingt irgendwie ein bisschen verrückt, aber vielleicht lustig? Kann man auf jeden Fall gut mit einem Ausflug auf die Insel verbinden!

5/ Open Air Rave (Sun 15-22h - €10)

Am Sonntag gib es im Prater einen recht coolen Open Air rave von ‘Du Tanzt Mich Mal’. Am Mainfloor gibt es House, Minimal und Acid und am Rooftop Floor downtempo.
Achja, alternativ kann man auch direkt am Kobenzl Raven bei ‘Kein Sonntag ohne Techno’.

🎨 A little bit of culture & other 💎

• The Sound of Everyday Life - Sound installation // Thur 18:30
• PowerPoint Karaoke // Thur 20-22:30
• Exhibition - Connection Generations and Stories // Fr 19h
• Opening Vienna Festwochen - Rathausplatz // Fr 21h
• Repair Festival // Fr, Sat 12-18h

🔥Party Party

What are the best parties this weekend?
Thursday

• Überstunden Afterwork - Ziizuu // House, Disco
• Donnersdub - Club-U // Dub, Reggae
• Acid Lambada -SASS // Techno

Friday

• Afterwork -Sofiensäle // House, Disco, Pop
• Art Arttech - Camera Club // Techno
• Freuden Taumel - Flucc // Electronic
• Space Invaders - O der Klub // Disco, House, HipHop
• Herzfrequenz - Das Werk // Techno

Saturday

• Wine & Dance - Volksgarten (Starts at 15h) // House
• Concert Mochana - Kramladen // Deutschpop
• 17 Years Viper Room - Viper Room // Rock, Punk, 80s
• Free OpenAir Rave - Himmerl & Wasser // Electronic

Sunday
Cosmic Soul - Pratersauna // Sex positive, techno, psytrance
Steve Hope - Vienna Hope Beach Club // Electronic
Live Music (Tobias Kirchebner) - Gleis Garten // Live concert
Felix Jaehn - O der Klub // House
Heaven Vienna (Orange Edition) - The Loft // Pop, House
Kein Sonntag Ohne Techno - Schloss Cobenzl // Techno
Get this every week into your inbox here: https://wienwasgeht.beehiiv.com/
--------------------

🇬🇧 English Version

Thur:🌤️20° Fr: 🌧️18° Sat:☀️23° Sun:🌤️23

🤌 Laurin’s Picks

This week a couple of extra events as the Monday is a public holiday! 🙂 Let’s get to it 🚀

1/ Thursday Special: Free Live Concert (Thur 19h - Free)

This Thursday there will be another free concert at Superbude in the second district. This time there will be a concert of James Choice, you can listen to the music here. I will most likely be there, so say hello if you are also there! 🙂
Alternatively, this weekend the ‘Sky Garden’ is officially kicking off the season so if you want a nice after work drink with an amazing view, this is the place to be!

2/ Second Hand Market Karmelitamarkt (Thur-Fr 08-20h - Free)

Next to special offers from all the local shops, there will be a variety of artists displaying their art right in the second district! Great if you enjoy browsing through some unique art!

3/ International Documentary Film Festival (Thur-Sun - €9)

This Friday there will be the kick-off of the international film festival in Vienna. There will be various documentaries shown in both the Votiv as well as the De France cinema.
Maybe perfect for a rainy Friday? 🌦️

4/ Asian & Austrian street food and culture festival (Fr-Sun 10-22h - Free)

Potentially a strange mixture of different cultures, food and traditions. At the same time could be pretty cool and refreshing to combine all of this into one street food festival!
Either way, it’s happening on the Donauinsel, so if the weather is nice, you can definitely enjoy this as a small trip! 🙂

5/ Open Air Rave (Sun 15-22h - €10)

This Sunday there are a couple of nice raves! First up, at Prater with ‘Du Tanzt Mich Mal’. They will play a mixture of house, minimal, acid and downtempo.
Alternatively, you can also check out the party happening at the Kobenzl, which will provide you with probably the best view over Vienna you can get. The party there is ‘Kein Sonntag ohne Techno’.

🎨 A little bit of culture & other 💎

• The Sound of Everyday Life - Sound installation // Thur 18:30
• PowerPoint Karaoke // Thur 20-22:30
• Exhibition - Connection Generations and Stories // Fr 19h
• Opening Vienna Festwochen - Rathausplatz // Fr 21h
• Repair Festival // Fr, Sat 12-18h

🔥Party Party

What are the best parties this weekend?
Thursday

• Überstunden Afterwork - Ziizuu // House, Disco
• Donnersdub - Club-U // Dub, Reggae
• Acid Lambada -SASS // Techno

Friday

• Afterwork -Sofiensäle // House, Disco, Pop
• Art Arttech - Camera Club // Techno
• Freuden Taumel - Flucc // Electronic
• Space Invaders - O der Klub // Disco, House, HipHop
• Herzfrequenz - Das Werk // Techno

Saturday

• Wine & Dance - Volksgarten (Starts at 15h) // House
• Concert Mochana - Kramladen // Deutschpop
• 17 Years Viper Room - Viper Room // Rock, Punk, 80s
• Free OpenAir Rave - Himmerl & Wasser // Electronic

Sunday

• Cosmic Soul - Pratersauna // Sex positive, techno, psytrance
• Steve Hope - Vienna Hope Beach Club // Electronic
• Live Music (Tobias Kirchebner) - Gleis Garten // Live concert
• Felix Jaehn - O der Klub // House
• Heaven Vienna (Orange Edition) - The Loft // Pop, House
• Kein Sonntag Ohne Techno - Schloss Cobenzl // Techno

------------

⭐️️ How did I do?

• ❤️ Leiwand
• 😐 Meh
• 🥱 Mir ist immer noch ur langweilig, ich will mehr Content über ...
• 😡 Ich hasse dich, ich hasse den Newsletter - Du hast mir mein WE versaut

Ihr könnt mir auch direkt unter [laurin.wirth@gmail.com](mailto:laurin.wirth@gmail.com) schreiben.
------------
Get notified for the next version here

As fun as it can be to think about prepping for things like a global collapse of everything, let's face facts: the things that will probably get you will be personal, or maybe local at worst.
Disaster scenarios ripped from Sci-Fi storylines are not what you need to be preparing for - it's what Prepper Youtubers talk up to make you scared and push you to spend money on things you don't need. And many, MANY people in this sub need a leg up when it comes to understanding what may and may not likely be a threat to you.
Risk Assessment Matrix
The easiest way to show yourself what threats are real is a Threat Assessment Matrix. This is a common tool used in project management that anyone can use. From your homestead to your workplace to your next road trip, if you want a guide to how to prepare, a threat assessment matrix lays it out for you.
Here's a detailed guide on how to create a threat assessment matrix.
Curious what might really cause injury? https://injuryfacts.nsc.org/ has data. (Spoiler: EMP is not a common disaster or cause of death)
Situational Awareness
Part of being prepared for anything is being aware of your surroundings. Practicing situational awareness at home, on the road, and even at the store, is a great way to train yourself how to spot and assess threats in real time.
This thing about situational awareness is that you quickly come to understand that low-probability threats like EMPs or Nuclear War or meteorite impacts aren't what you see with your own eyes on a daily basis. It helps you groundtruth what you found in your Risk Assessment Matrix.
Basic guide to situational awareness
Another guide
And some videos! This lady knows what's going on.
A little stock-footage-y, but decent.
There's even videos to test yourself.
Put down your phone and look around.

Hello people we are group of 2 right now who are complete beginner in ML. So before starting we would like to expand our group so we all be in the same boat.
Our aim is to start slow and have deep understanding of ML algorithms and practicing daily and help each other.
So if anybody interested you can approach us.
This group is not only for beginners it's also for pro as well as they can mentor others.
DM me if u want to join!

Well, Hi all! again! 4Th Wall here, I figured since I just got power back, I might as well play some catch up on both series. Hope you enjoy this episode!!
Yup, I fucked that up. This is a repost with the correct Episode number, LOL! It's been a while since I've done that.
First, Previous, Next (Patreon)
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Benjamin smiled, watching the girls skip ahead of him. Today was a testing day of sorts for him. Unwilling to release firearms into this world haphazardly, yet unwilling to go without them as a backup; he had pulled from one of his sister’s favorite video games. He had “melted down” his bowie knife, repurposing the metal to be used in his latest creation. The final product rode on his hip like a short sword, but Ben was satisfied in the design when the vast majority of the people he passed ignored it as just another adventurer’s blade. Benjamin hoped, that with the existence of Majik, that he would be able to pass off any… peculiarities... as the realm of the supernatural.

The three of them arrived at the tailor’s establishment, and the girls were met with a customary indifference that seemed to present itself when a slave’s “master” was present. The moment Benjamin entered, the seamstress ceased to pay attention to the girls, and instead addressed him directly, “Ah, The Forgemaster’s Protégé. What can I do for you this day.” She said cooly, bowing slightly in welcome. “I’m here commission some clothing for these two, a reward for good service.” Benjamin began. It was technically true; the success of the forge had afforded him much more coin than a mere apprentice could have made. Qort had taken him on as a true partner, and Benjamin earned enough to comfortably afford to cloth his “slaves” in whatever he chose.

Some stigma’s remained however, and the seamstress seemed to glare sideways at the girls as they perused the fabrics adorning the walls. “Is that wise? A slave could lose her place with such gifts.” she asked, her polite tone barely hiding her disapproval. Benjamin sighed internally, ‘oh for fucks sake’ he groaned in his own mind before putting on facad, “I find that proper reward, afforded on the right servant can result in” he paused, projecting a smug expression and blatantly looking the girls up and down. “a profound dedication to their duties” he finished with a satisfied smile as the seamstress covered her mouth with a hand to hide a smile of her own. The gambit worked, and the Seamstress was obviously satisfied that the “Aereesen slave whores” were being properly “used”. “Ah, I understand. What did you have in mind for them.” She practically moaned back at Benjamin. ‘This hag needs a good pounding….’ Benjamin’s inner monologue threatened to crack his facade, “That’s the fun part, my good lady. It’s their choice. The surprise is half the excitement.” He chuckled.

The seamstress openly smiled at him this time before nodding and stepping over to the two girls. Benjamin breathed a sigh of relief as she seemed to treat them at least marginally more warmly. The old racist bag didn’t need to know that Benjamin was secretly building a small nest egg for his girls, or that his sending them out to do errands for him was how he was teaching them about money, value, and the application of Mathematics. She also didn’t need to know that the full Cutlery set that she had purchased last week had been made by Vi’s own hand as her first full solo commission set. Benjamin had stamped his “mark” on them, because slaves were not allowed to own anything, including their own work; but Vi had begun with raw steel and finished with one of the finest cooking knife sets he had seen in this world or his.

Benjamin settled onto a bench outside, using the excuse of wanting to enjoy the morning air to afford his girls some privacy. Now that Viola and Valtrya were eating a healthy diet, and the right calorie amount; they had blossomed into absolute bombshells. Their hair had recovered, and both sported long flowing locks that boasted a silky satin black color and texture that betrayed hints of deep royal purple. The color reminded Benjamin of one of those expensive custom car paints that changed color depending on the lighting.

Their skin recovered almost as quickly as their hair. The sickly, scabbed look was quickly replaced with the same satin quality as their hair to the touch, but with a light grey coloring that almost seemed to tease the edge of hinting at a greyish purple. A dense pattern of Small freckles of the same dark, almost royal, purple as the highlights in their hair frolicked on both girl’s cheeks, and down the sides of their necks. Because of their early lack of understanding on modestly, Ben knew that those freckles traveled much further. The sad truth was that Benjamin understood fully why Aereesen’s were the prize of slavers and brothels, and he silently prayed that he could give them enough self-worth and skill to have a better life than that, once he got them out of the Principality.

A door’s soft creaking broke Benjamin from his thoughts as the two sisters stepped out smiling, “Get everything you need?” he asked standing as the three of them departed the establishment. Val nodded vigorously, and Vi smiled as she spoke, “I think so, but I had to practically beg the woman to stop showing us lingerie… what did you tell her?” Benjamin felt his cheeks heat as he responded, “What I had to. The old hag doesn’t get enough at home. It’s not my fault that your ‘enthusiasm’ is in the forge and your studies, not between the sheets. I didn’t lie to her, I just let her draw her own conclusions, sorry.”

Vi’s eyes twinkled for a second, “Oh,” She smirked, “Thaaat’s why she broke out the silk. Some of her options were..” She blatantly bit her lip at Benjamin. “You didn’t…” He asked in shock, and Vi lifted up on her tippy toes to brush her lips against his ear, “Not telling” she purred, setting Bens senses on fire. She backed up a step, openly smirking at his beet red face. “But your expression is adorable… My Lord” She stated the last two words with a deep sultry tone, knowing that Ben couldn’t scold her in public before taking his hand, “May we visit the bazar next? Val saw some jewelry she wanted to look at.” Benjamin gave her a pointed look, that turned into a smile as she beamed at him, “Ok, sounds good. I need to pick up some food for the week.”

It was later that afternoon when the three of them left the bazar. They found Jukha waiting on the bench in front of their home. “Jukha! How are you!” Benjamin called, clasping the Orc’s hand firmly as the girls rushed inside to put up their purchases. Jukha reciprocated, if somewhat stiffly, to the strange to him gesture. “Benjamin, it is good to see you well.” His tone stopped Ben in his tracks, “What is it. Is your wife, ok?”
Jukha shook his head, “Vilora is well, but I have been tasked with finding you.” He said carefully, “The slaver, the one you dueled for those two,” he nodded to Vi and Val as they stepped back out of the building, “The Heir of The Romoregin house is here. He has lodged an official demand for satisfaction, and he brought a champion.”

Benjamin stiffened, “Another duel? You said an ‘official demand’… what happens if I refuse.” Jukha winced at Ben’s tone, “It is an archaic practice of my people, rarely remembered, and even more rarely demanded. You cannot deny a satisfaction claim, but should you prevail, no further claims can be made upon your person. I am sorry Benjamin, but if you flee or refuse, your life is forfeit; and your property goes to the claimant.” Jukha looked pointedly at Viola and Valtrya. “The young puke has put me in danger as well, if I do not deliver you and them to the duel, I can be detained. If they torture me….” Benjamin’s eyes widened before hardening in understanding. “Jukha…” He turned to find Viola standing next to him, with his musket in one arm and his ammunition bag in the other, and sighed, “Fuck”. He loaded his musket with a single roundball cartridge this time, unwilling to fire buck and ball in the town streets. He pealed the ball out of the paper wading after pouring the poweder, reaching into his haversack to retrieve a small round patch made of pillow ticking. Jukha looked on in mild fascination as Benjamin spit on the cloth patch before wrapping the ball in it and ramming the whole thing down the barrel. It wasn’t much, but it reduce windage, ensuring at least reasonable enough accuracy from the smoothbore to keep from hitting innocent bystanders. It would also virtually eliminate blow-by, upping the chamber pressure and giving him a little more velocity. “I’m ready.”

The four of them entered the small city square to be met with Qort and three Org guards. These soldiers wore different insignia that Benjamin had been taught were the mark of the capital. “Beenjaymen Shayfe” one of them butchered his name, “I am.” Ben nodded firmly, the other guard nodded, “And your two slaves, good. Has Jukha informed you of the proceedings.” Benjamin scowled, “A legalized way to attempt a revenge killing? Yea, I’ve been told.” Ben didn’t bother to hide his vitriol, “So I have to kill a motherfucker for defending myself from his father?”

“Not quite. The Heir has brought a champion. The rules are simple, all forms of combat are allowed” The first guard began as the second one began chaining the wrists of Viola and Valtrya. Benjamin began to move before thinking, only to be held back by Jukha, “Peace albino. They must do this. Fighting them will cause a forfeit.” Benjamin looked at the terrified faces of the two girls. He forced himself to calm down outwardly, but Benjamin could feel the rage building. He had worked so hard to save those two, to get them out.. now some snot nosed brat was going to try to kill him because his father didn’t know when to fuck off. Benjamin stepped out from around the guards. The “heir” was a young Durr. Ben had no frame of reference for age, but the Heir was substantially shorter, and his facial tentacles were almost mere buds. Beside him stood a crimson colossus, the same species as the Hunter he had shot saving Jukha. He was taller than that female, and was wearing plate armor, gilded in silver. He hefted a great sword of some kind and smiled openly at Benjamin. It was not a pleasant expression. “Ah, so You’re the puke I’ll be cleaning from my blade. I am Krastorin. Come here, pale one, I’ll make it quick.”

Benjamin looked him over, subtly shifting into a shooting stance but keeping his musket looking like he was resting the butt of a spear on the ground. “You look accomplished, what makes you do the bidding of the boy.” He asked, blatant scorn on his tone. The Young Durr flinched, his small tentacle buds writhing violently. “H’Dare Yee!” he bellowed, voice cracking with the strain of fury, “Aye’ll ‘ave Yee Head on Me’Wall!!”
Benjamin ignored him, focusing on the Hellirine. The man looked back at the boy with a raised eyebrow, “The young puke promised me one of those.” He pointed at Vi and Val, who had reverted to their former trembling submissive postures that Ben had met them in. “It appears that they are as well kept as claimed. I look forward to sampling them.” He leered. Benjamin looked over at the Young Durr and found his face a mixture of relief and anger. ‘Ah, lied about daddy’s slaves.’ He turned to the soldier standing next to him, “Is the duel on?” he growled.

“Combatants! Begin!” was the Soldiers response, and the crimson mercenary lifted his sword from his shoulders advancing forward with a long confident stride, “at last, let’s get this over wi..” a clap of thunder echo’d through the Feral wood, and most of the crowd cried out in surprise as Benjamin disappeared, seemingly behind a bubble of fire, and brimstone. The single round ball ignored the mercenary’s plate armor. Punching straight through as the soft lead mushroomed out into a ragged disk that measured almost an inch and a half. The mangled projectile, still travelling at almost half the speed of sound, eviscerated the chest cavity of the Mercenary before blowing a one foot wide hole out of the crimson man’s back. The exit wound missed Krastorin’s spine by an inch, but it didn’t matter. The projectile embedded itself into a post, thankfully missing any bystanders by mere inches in some cases. The Young Durr, who was standing just behind and to the side of his champion, was screaming as he pawed at the bits of pale yellow blood, bones, and fragments of internal organs now covering him from head to toe.

Benjamin handed the smoking musket to Jukha, drawing his short sword and walking over to a sputtering, choking, and coughing Krastorin. The Hellirine lay face down on the ground, having fallen that way from the momentum of his initial advance. The back of Benjamins mind was sickly amused as he remembered the old Hollywood trope of bullets throwing people backward, and a pinch of regret sparked in his soul as his opponent death rattled. He stepped up to the Heir, resting the blade against his neck, “Are we done here. Be a better man than your father and learn when to save your own life.” The Young Durr froze, staring up at him in abject terror for several moments as a puddle formed at his feet. Benjamin opened his mouth to speak again when the boy simply passed out, falling into the puddle of his own mess as his mind refused to stay conscious.

Benjamin turned to walk back towards Jukha and the girls. “Unchain them.” Benjamin’s tone could have frozen a raging forge’s inferno. To his surprise, two of the soldiers drew their weapons on him, “You need to come with us. All Touched must be registered with...” Benjamin pointed his short sword at the one talking… and pulled the trigger. The percussion revolver built into the hilt of the short sword was zero’d using a notch Benjamin cut into the crossguard, and the tip of the curved blade as a crude set of open sights. The barrel of the revolver lay along one side of the blade, and was rifled. The speaking soldier orc’s took the smaller pistol round through the forehead, exploding the back of his skull in a cone of dark green and grey mist. The exit wound showered his companion in bits of bone and brains. Benjamin’s thumb found the hammer, and four satisfying clicks echo’d in the stunned silence, “HEAR ME!” He growled, “I, am touched by the Gods. I posses the power to end any life I choose using the power of Hell itself!” ‘if I have to show them a gun, might as well throw them off the trail’ “The violence of the raging volcano obeys my very fingertips.” His revolvesword bucked a second time as another soldier orc made a move to rush him. The smaller pistol round still punched through the orcs armor and out the back, but only left him screaming on the ground. Benjamin re-cocked, and leveled his weapon at the orc holding the chains to Val and Vi. “Now, release them.” This last remaining Orc did as asked, before gathering up his screaming companion as the girls rushed to Benjamin, he pulled them close, whispering, “I’m sorry we wont be able to pick up your dresses.”

The three of them packed up that night. Qort had understood, knowing all too well what the Principality would do to acquire a Touched of Benjamins ability. “Stay safe my friend. I pray our paths cross again.” Jukha snuck them out of the village that night, using his wagon to get them to his home. They stayed a week, laying low while they planned their next move. The girls spent their time learning recipes from Jukha’s wife, and ben took the time to unwind a bit. Jukha and He went on a hunt, and Benjamin was given a run down on the flora and fauna of the Feral wood. The two of them brought back a pair of Stags, and the three women cooked them a feast.

“Dinner’s ready!!” called Viola, setting the last of the sides on the table as the dutch oven roasted meat was brought off of the stove top. It was a simple yet elegant meal. Stag, potatoes, some kind of Kale style vegetable that Benjamin had never seen before. Soon enough, everyone at the table was leaning back, as full as they could make themselves. “So, pinkskin,” Jukha asked, “Where do you plan on going. I wouldn’t mind you staying with me. I could use another hunter, but I suspect that they would notice the extra product I brought to the village.”

Benjamin Hummed, “The Maridian Combine. Qort told me that they banned slavery over a century ago, the girls have learned so much already. It would be easy to find jobs for them.” Vi and Val drooped slightly but hid it well. Jukha noticed it but said nothing. “A good choice, their boarders are well guarded, you would need to free them before you cross, or end up in a dungeon yourself.”

“Good point, I can write up a simple writ of freedom. Something I can sign and give to them.” Benjamin nodded, “I can get started on that to…” he paused as a hand fell on his. He looked to see Viola staring at him, fighting back tears, “Hey, what’s wrong. You will be free…” Jukha nodded slowly and stood. “love,” he said to Vilora, “I need some help with the livestock” The Farie met his eyes in unspoken understanding, fluttering out the front door with Jukha.

“Vi, what’s wrong.” Benjamin asked gently.

“No… go… Val… stay…” Both of them turned to Valtrya in shock. She was trembling, “I wont..leave.”

“You speak?” Benjamin looked in shock, but Viola spoke next, “Benjamin, we don’t want to leave. We want to stay, with you. I…” She paused. Ben sighed, “I want you to stay too.” He said, finally admitting it to himself, “But I can’t own you. It’s killing me that you are my property.” He reached up and wiped a tear from Vi’s eyes, “You are so much more than property. I feel evil, every day that I wake up knowing that I could do anything I wanted to you, or worse, die and have someone else hurt you for the fun of it.” Benjamin bowed his head. Viola reached out, lifting his chin to look into his eyes, “Then come with us.” She whispered as Val stood up and stepped around the table, “yes.. You, come.” She wrapped herself around Ben from the side leaning in until she was resting her head against his shoulder, “I’m… staying.. with you.” she said softly. Viola nodded, “Benjamin, how old do you think we are.”

Ben looked at her in confusion, “I have no idea, I’ve always assumed you were teenagers. 13-14 years old for Val, maybe 16 for you, but that was when you were skin and bones.” He admitted.

Viola’s eyes widened in understanding. “You did not want to bed us because you thought us children.” Benjamin nodded slowly, answering. “And forcing sex on a child is the worst kind of crime on my world”. Viola and Valtrya looked at each other, before Vi spoke. “Ben, my sister will turn one hundred and three in a fortnight. I just had my one hundred and fifteenth birthday last week.” She leaned in, pressing her lips to Bens as she kissed him passionately for a moment. “We are no children,” Viola paused as Valtrya leaned in, kissing Ben lightly on the neck, “You are not forcing us to do anything, but leave.” Viola whispered as she began to close in to a surprised Benjamin for another kiss.

The door to the cabin flew open violently, and the girls pulled back to a more modest distance. Jukha walked in, carrying a panting Vilora. “What happened.” Ben asked hurriedly, hoping he wasn’t blushing as hard as the heat on his cheeks suggested. Vilora waved a hand as Jukha set her down in her chair, “The Vin… My sisters… they reached out… They wish to meet…” The Farie gathered herself, “They also sent a warning. We must leave, tonight… hunters.”
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