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Where is the evidence of any of it? I mean absolutely no one has shown any evidence of any wrong doing on her part.
Hell the only one that does is Frostyklondike and the only actual evidence there is that Yaki was taking to long with the cosplay which can apparently take months to complete in some cases so either she was taking to long or she was still trying to work on them. She has no proof of any of the other allegations made against Yakirisu.
The rest all only showed things that they claim she did with the proof they used being literal conversations they had with the other accusers calling her a bad person.
So where exactly are all these messages that were from her that prove she is the second coming of Satan, and why exactly did not a single person ever post them?
This is made because of a recent video someone made of the situation and Ultima's response in the comments where he says she sent aggressive messages to him back when he lived with her, yet never even bothered to actually show which would have been actual proof, and instead showed a conversation with Fadel someone who she did not get along with and is in no way any sort of evidence.

Anybody know what happened to this one video, where Alpha, WeeGee, Smith and Yaki (i think?) play every minigame? Wanted to rewatch it, but it's either gone or very hard to find

Thanks to this community I was able to plan my own trip covering Osaka and Tokyo within 9 days. Although there were several posts but very rare from Indian perspective. Indians have a very different requirements in comparison to western travellers so I will try to focus on things like hotels(value for money), vegetarian/vegan food and things to do.
Day 0 (14 March)
I took ANA flight from Delhi to Tokyo(Roundtrip) which costed me 540$ per person. I booked flights 3 months in advance during their sale and got a great deal. Instead of roundtrip I should have booked my outgoing flight from Osaka, this would have saved me another 100$ per person.
Flight was amazing and I had the best food on any airline ever. I would recommend taking direct flights if the price difference is not much.
Day 1(15 march)
Landed at Haneda Airport at 5 am, 1 hour earlier than expected. I already had my japan travel QR printouts that I used which saved me about 15 mins to fill the form. Got Welcome Suica card from airport and boarded keikyu line to Hotel Tavinos Asakusa.My first ride became complicated when the first 6 coaches detached at shinagawa station. Have not heard about metro trains detaching at stations before.
Dropped my luggage at hotel around 9 am and was told to retry for check in after 12 pm. Heated Sitaram Chole Bhathure ready to eat in hotel's lobby for breakfast along with coffee that was available.Visited sensoji temple and Skytree tower in afternoon. We did not go on top of skytree.
Lunch T's TanTan at Ueno station - This was the most hyped vegan restaurant but it did not live up to our expecation.
Roamed Akhiabara in the evening and played video games at several game parlours around. Tried to revisit this place again but could not.
Dinner Coco Ichibanya - it had just 1 vegan option which we chose with maximum spice level. Reccomended
Day 2(16 march)
I booked a group trip to Mount Fuji and Lake Kawaguchiko via Expedia. Bus departed from Shijnuku at 7 am sharp and on time. Trip was average and could have been done by self easily. While the Chureito Pagoda was nice to click pictures, lake view points were not great. Not recommended.
Lunch - Poha and Upma from MTR. Haldiram's bhelpuri mix for snacks.
Got shinkansen tickets to Kyoto for next day.
Dinner - Accidentally visited a nepali restaurant - Panas thinking it was indian in asakusa. They served me chowmein with potatoes and peas : Not recommended.
Day 3(17 march)
Checked out from hotel. As it was a sunday, I could not get my luggage delivered. We brought luggage with us and got it delivered to our hotel at Osaka. They charged us 5000 yen for 2 bags which I now realise was expensive. Lockers were full all over the station.
We spent rest of the day, roaming Kyoto - Fushima Inari, Kinkaku ji and Arashiyama Bamboo forest. I recommend skipping Kinkaku ji. Crowds were okayish at all places.
Lunch Yasubee - Visited my first tepanyaki restaurant. Had vegetarian Okonomiyaki and Yakisoba. This along with Shochu highball was our best meal yet. Highly reccomended.
Checked in our hotel - hotel the flag shinsaibashi, spent 15 minutes decoding their entrance :) . Hotel was at with par indian standards with spacious rooms and cleanliness. This was also 5 minutes walking to dontobori street.
Dinner Oko Okonomiyaki - We had at least 1 meal everyday we were in Osaka. This was vegan joint with amazing Okonomiyaki, yaki-soba and gyozas. Although queues are super long, but because this was near to our hotel we visited this at odd hours.
Day 4 (18 march)
After 3 continuous days of no-sleep, we woke up late today. We did not find any of the top visits interesting, so spent most of the afternoon roaming around.
Lunch Daiki-suisan kaitenzushi Dotombori - Unexpectedly bumped into this revolving sushi restaurant. Wanted to try it and management were happy to point out some vegetarian sushi and udon noodles. This was an experience indeed. Highly recommended.
Visited Tsutenkaku Tower in evening. Roamed around and decided last minute to go up the tower. This tower had a vibe, I did not regret paying for it.
Dinner Shinsekai Paprika Shokudo Vegan - We had Kushikatsu, Takoyaki and Miso soup. This meal was one of the most expensive and tasteless on the other hand. We had open a ready to eat back at our hotel to fill ourself.
Day 5 (19 march) - Universal studios
My whole revolved around visiting Universal studios. I had purchased 4 ride pass which included - Harry Potter and forbidden journey, Demon slayer, Jaws and My hero academia.We were at the gate at 8:30 am and I lost my heart as soon as I saw the crowd at the station. There must be around 2k people waiting in the queue.
Gates opened at 9 and we entered the park at 9:30 am. We had packed lot of snacks and we were allowed to carry it inside after informing them about our diet restrictions.
Everybody ran for nintendo and we instead got in forMinion mayhem. Obtained Nintendo timed entry for 1:30 pm. Here were my wait times and rating
Minion mayhem (9:20 am) - 0 wait time 7.0/10
Freeze Ray sliders(10 am) - 30 mins wait time Below average
Demon slayer (Fast pass)(10:30 am) - 30 mins wait time with pass 8/10
Jaws(Fast pass)(12:30pm) - 5 min wait time with pass 8/10
Forbidden Journey (Fast Pass) (1:30 pm) - 10 minutes wait time 15/10
Mario kart(2 pm)(Single rider) - 15 minutes wait time 3/10
Yoshi's adventure(3 pm) - 45 minutes wait time 6/10
We were exhausted by 4 pm and decided to skip My hero academia even though we had a fast pass for it. We were not allowed to enter before time.
Lunch - Desserts and churros at several places, ready to eat
dinner - Oko Okonomiyaki with usual order
Visits clubs around Dontobori at night.
Part 2 coming soon

It’s my birthday soon and I want to buy a wig. I’ve got a budget of £300 (which cN stretch) and want to buy something that has at least a decent bit of quality. But I’m finding that most affordable websites are full of reviews that may not be trustworthy.
How I know: I just brought a cheap (and crap) v part wig from amazon (needed something quickly) and the seller offered me a free wig or 3 bundles if I leave a good review with pics. I used the same reviews to pick the sellerr and assume that most of the reviews left are fake.
I want a kinky straight wig and a light yaki wig. I’ve watched at videos and used trust pilot to check on sellers but can’t decide.
Places I’ve looked: West kiss hair Nadula hair Bgm girl hair Julia hair
Who do you be trusting out here?

It’s my birthday soon and I want to buy a wig. I’ve got a budget of £300 (which cN stretch) and want to buy something that has at least a decent bit of quality. But I’m finding that most affordable websites are full of reviews that may not be trustworthy.
How I know: I just brought a cheap (and crap) v part wig from amazon (needed something quickly) and the seller offered me a free wig or 3 bundles if I leave a good review with pics. I used the same reviews to pick the sellerr and assume that most of the reviews left are fake.
I want a kinky straight wig and a light yaki wig. I’ve watched at videos and used trust pilot to check on sellers but can’t decide.
Places I’ve looked: West kiss hair Nadula hair Bgm girl hair Julia hair
Who do you be trusting out here?

​

1. Dark Fantasy
2. The Transfiguration of Jeffrey Dharma
3. Book 2 of The Dharma Series
4. David Pugh
5. Cover Art
6. Available in Paperback/eBook
7. African criminal, Aboboulaye Jatta, is back from the dead and has taken control of his young son’s body. Through books of arcane magic, found in the Library of Alexandria, he has gained immense power and has given the boy a cursed ability to transform into a vile, hyena spirit beast. Jeffrey Dharma, whose wife died because of Jatta’s actions, is determined to save the boy, and destroy the demon’s ego forever. Together with his two colleagues, soul brother Remus Jallow and Shizuko Ichigo, former Japanese Adult Video idol, Dora Yaki, they have been given immense power by Jagannath, Lord of the Universe. However, they must learn to control that power and find their own spirit beasts. They form a coalition with one-time mercenary, Molefi Bankaketse, who engineered Jatta’s demise in his previous life and a group of powerful deities and demigods. These heavenly beings include the goddess, Kali, Issa Kristna and his celestial brother, Sananda Immanuel, who have both played the part of Yeshua of Nazareth. As a result of that earthly incarnation, they unwittingly created the immortal demigods, Ananias and Sapphira, who were blasted by the Holy Spirit in the inept hands of Keppa, the man who became known as St. Peter, all three join the alliance against Bob Jatta. Jatta forms his own coalition of devils, who include Niccolo Machiavelli, The Comte de Saint Germain and the leaders of two bands of fallen angels, Lord Ashtar and Hatonn Christ Michael, who have been waging an eternal war against each other.
8. “Read Dharma Sutra, you'll find yourself questioning what you think you know, and perhaps finding new answers.” Author, Terry Kerr
9. Paperback eBook

TLDR in the bottom.
Is food insecurity in Gaza Israel’s fault? Or is it because Hamas is stealing the aid going into Gaza? In this post I will look at evidence to see what has led to a ‘humanitarian crisis’ in Gaza. How many people are starving in Gaza? It is hard to quantify this for obvious reasons but according to A senior UN aid official (maybe you don’t think that this is a trustworthy source) warned that at least 576,000 people across the Gaza Strip - one quarter of the population - faced catastrophic levels of food insecurity and one in six children under the age of two in the north were suffering from acute malnutrition.
(https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-middle-east-68471572) So whose fault is it? Evidence of Hamas stealing the aid: So there are videos reportedly of Hamas stealing aid. As soon as aid enters certain areas of Gaza, armed masked men jump on the aid trucks; possibly Hamas. There are some claims items such as flour are being resold for $90 on the black market. https://www.timesofisrael.com/gaza-aid-trucks-stolen-by-gunmen-and-looted-as-convoys-start-crossing-from-israel/#:\~:text=In%20October%2C%20the%20United%20Nations,the%20posts%20were%20later%20deleted. But is it Hamas stealing the aid? USA officials claim that they have seen no evidence that Hamas is the ones stealing the aid. https://www.timesofisrael.com/us-envoy-israel-hasnt-provided-specific-evidence-hamas-is-stealing-aid-shipments/ Then who is stealing the aid? Supposedly, criminal gangs (possibly connected to Hamas but once again no evidence to prove this) have taken advantage of the scarcity of food in Gaza to make a profit. They are stealing aid and selling it at extorted prices. They do this by getting a hold of the trucks before they reach the distribution points. https://www.ft.com/content/9c7253aa-d201-487a-bf5c-901b142eb7e4 White House Senior Administration Officials have also claimed that some of the aid is being stolen by criminal gangs. https://www.miragenews.com/white-house-discusses-gaza-humanitarian-aid-1186008/ Who is the aid going to? There seems to be 3 outcomes for aid that goes into Gaza: We know that some of the aid is reaching the areas it is supposed to be distributed at as we can watch various videos of this. We know some of the aid going into Gaza is being stolen by criminal gangs as we can watch videos of this and this has been reported by US officials. We know that some of the aid is being looted by Palestinian civilians before reaching the distribution points as well. Now some may use this as a reason to criticize Palestinian civilians but I think that is rather ignorant as many Palestinians will be sheltering in areas with no distribution points and risk being killed in traveling to distribution points. On a side note this is similar to what happened in Mogadishu (Somalia) in the 1990s when there was a famine: some groups stole aid to sell at extorted prices and some civilians looted aid out of desperation. So these events are not uncommon in a population suffering from a mass food shortage. https://www.refworld.org/reference/annualreport/hrw/1993/en/92972 Claims of food theft were also reported in 2011 https://www.nytimes.com/2011/08/17/world/africa/17somalia.html Now while I think it is extremely immoral that criminal gangs would extort a famine to profit from (in Gaza and Somalia), I try to avoid judgment (even though it definitely is immoral) on those doing the crimes as I have never lived through a famine and been put in a situation where I have had to survive/make money (or ensure my family survives) in such dire circumstances. While I am disgusted I also think how many in these criminal gangs feel it is the only way to keep them and their families alive. Hopefully, you or I will never have to be put into such a tough situation to find out if my desire to survive would overpower my moral values. Were Hamas police officers stealing aid? Eylon Levy, the Israeli spokesperson to western media, has used a picture of Hamas police on an aid truck going into an UNRWA distribution center to prove that both Hamas is stealing aid and is working directly with UNRWA. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8YCr1c2zMI https://twitter.com/EylonALevy/status/1751308605586858407 Now does this picture prove Hamas police are stealing aid? No not really, the picture originated from the Hamas police facebook page. It was actually a PR photo posted by the Gaza police force to show that they were safely facilitating aid. Now some of you may be saying this proves that UNRWA and aid distributors are complicit with Hamas but answer me this: Do you expect UNRWA employees or other aid distributors to guard the aid? Are aid distributors supposed to fight off criminal gangs and dozens of looters? Is it really that ridiculous that they would accept help from the Gaza police in an attempt to have some protection?
Were Hamas police stopping aid from being stolen? Now we can speculate and say that Hamas (or the police) were stealing the aid but there is no evidence to prove this and once again US officials have said there is no evidence that Hamas is stealing aid (https://www.timesofisrael.com/us-envoy-israel-hasnt-provided-specific-evidence-hamas-is-stealing-aid-shipments/). So you can believe Hamas or the hamas police officers are stealing aid if you like but there is no evidence of this. However, there are reports that a lot more aid is being stolen now by criminal gangs (or looters) than earlier in the war because the Gaza police have refused to continue protecting the aid because IDF soldiers keep on shooting the Hamas police while guarding the aid. https://www.wsj.com/world/middle-east/as-israel-drives-out-hamas-lawlessness-hampers-gaza-aid-efforts-2438be11 “UN officials have accused Israeli strikes of targeting police guarding aid convoys, as well as police stations and cars. Officers have also not been paid in months due to the war.” David Satterfield, the US ambassador appointed by Mr Biden to co-ordinate humanitarian aid to Gaza, said recently: “With the departure of police escorts it has been virtually impossible for the UN or anyone else… to safely move assistance in Gaza because of criminal gangs.” https://www.telegraph.co.uk/world-news/2024/03/01/palestinian-blue-police-gaza-aid-convoy-israel-attack-hamas/ https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/2024/02/22/gaza-aid-deliveries-looting-police-hamas/ “The gangs exploit the fact that Hamas police officers are unable to go out armed and in uniform to protect the aid trucks” https://www.haaretz.com/israel-news/2024-02-22/ty-article/.premium/as-hunger-spreads-in-gaza-gangs-looting-aid-become-increasingly-brazen/0000018d-d06c-df79-a5cd-f07eebd30000 Should the Gaza Police be allowed to protect the aid (if they are really doing so)? The Gaza police is Hamas-run (as Hamas is the government and control every public sector in Gaza) and composed of Hamas members but also politically unaffiliated people and the remnants of the Palestinian Authority force. Now some may feel as the Gaza police force is composed of some Hamas members (some of whom are likely militants) that it is justified that the IDF kills anyone in a Police uniform distributing aid. Some may argue that as long as the police are not using the aid trucks to fire at IDF soldiers (and there has been no evidence of this) then it is important that aid is distributed safely (as long as that is what the police are actually doing) to the starving population. Perhaps as many police officers are not Hamas members or militants, it is worth allowing them to distribute aid properly as long as they are doing so. This I suppose is just a matter of opinion: Is it more important to kill all Gaza police protecting aid as they might be Hamas militants? Or is it more important that aid is distributed correctly and not stolen by criminal gangs (for exploitation) even if it means that some potential (and it is unlikely to be known if they are militants or not) Hamas militants aren’t killed (as long as they are distributing aid)? I suppose this comes down to how important it is from a military perspective to kill all Gaza police officers (many of whom are not Hamas militants). Now is Israel to blame for any of this? Now you could say that the IDF killing Gaza police is partly responsible for gangs stealing aid and selling it at extorted prices. But is there anything else? First we have to look into how much aid is getting into Gaza now versus before war: Before the war, 500 aid trucks were going into Gaza carrying aid and commercial goods, including things like food, water, animal fodder, medical supplies and fuel. What proportion of this aid was food and water is unclear. But what we do know is that before the war even started approximately half of the people in Gaza were food insecure and more than 80 percent reliant on humanitarian aid. https://www.ohchr.org/en/press-releases/2024/01/over-one-hundred-days-war-israel-destroying-gazas-food-system-and#:\~:text=Since%209%20October%2C%20Israel%20declared,insecure%20and%20more%20than%2080 So there were already high levels of food insecurity before the war even started and reducing aid going into Gaza would worsen that. The UN claims that 500 trucks a day of just humanitarian aid need to go in at a bare minimum. Some may claim that these numbers have been exaggerated by the UN but these calculations assume that one aid truck could feed 4,000 people a day which seems like an overestimate if anything. However the most aid trucks allowed in on a single day since the war began was 300. There have been days where less than 10 trucks go in (less than 2% of the aid needed for that day). (https://www.npr.org/2024/02/21/1232605200/humanitarian-aid-gaza-israel#:\~:text=Roughly%20500%20trucks%20of%20humanitarian,spokesperson%20for%20UNRWA%2C%20the%20U.N.) Additionally in February less than 100 aid trucks went into Gaza a day on average. From January 1st to January 6th, only 21 per cent (5 out of 24) of planned deliveries of aid containing food and other lifesaving supplies reached north Gaza (where 300,000 people are still living) as the majority were rejected by the IDF. (https://www.ohchr.org/en/press-releases/2024/01/over-one-hundred-days-war-israel-destroying-gazas-food-system-and#:\~:text=Since%209%20October%2C%20Israel%20declared,insecure%20and%20more%20than%2080). According to the WHO, Israel blocked all aid going into Northern Gaza from January 23rd to February 27th. This is where starvation is at its highest levels and Israel started allowing aid into Northern Gaza once these reports came out as there were also reports of children starving to death in Northern Gaza (https://edition.cnn.com/2024/03/04/middleeast/gaza-children-dying-malnutrition-israel-ceasefire-talks-intl-hnk/index.html).
But is it Israel’s fault a lack of aid is getting into Gaza? Well aid takes a long time getting in due to lengthy inspections by Israel (some may say this is necessary, others may say this is done purposely to starve Gaza). The long queues for inspection have led to bottlenecks at the Rafah crossing, the UN’s World Food Programme (WFP) said last month, adding that among items deemed “dual use” by Israel are power generators, crutches, field hospital kits, inflatable water tanks, wooden boxes of children’s toys and, “perhaps most depressingly, 600 oxygen tanks.” https://edition.cnn.com/2024/02/11/middleeast/why-only-a-trickle-of-aid-is-getting-into-gaza-mime-intl/index.html “Israel forces aid organizations to purchase food from Egypt and prevents them from buying it in Israel, which would allow for a more efficient and rapid transfer of goods. Israel also prohibits the private sector in Gaza from purchasing food, which could significantly increase supply.” “the UN Under-Secretary-General for Humanitarian Affairs and Emergency Relief Coordinator, listed several reasons why aid cannot be efficiently distributed. Among other things, he noted that trucks are inspected several times before Israel allows them into Gaza, and even then, long lines form due to the conditions at Rafah Crossing. The little food that does get in is very difficult to distribute due to the constant bombings, destroyed roads, frequent communication blackouts, and shelters overflowing with of hundreds of thousands of IDPs crowding into smaller and smaller areas.” https://www.btselem.org/gaza\_strip/20240108\_israel\_is\_starving\_gaza But what about the aid providers themselves, are they not to blame? Israel has blamed the lack of aid in Gaza on the aid providers themselves and some aid deliveries are postponed and cancelled by those providing aid themselves but how much and why? In January about 10% of aid missions (in the North and South) were postponed by aid organisations themselves ‘due to internal operational constraints’. But in North Gaza, 71% of aid deliveries were denied by the IDF or initially facilitated then impeded and in the South of Gaza 32% of aid deliveries were denied by the IDF or initially facilitated. So in my opinion, the IDF is more to blame for aid not getting into Gaza than the aid distributors themselves as far more aid deliveries are being denied being let into Gaza by the IDF than are being suspended by the aid distributors themselves. Statistics for January: Aid to North of Wadi Gaza: 16% of planned aid missions were facilitated. Of 61 planned missions to the north, ten (16%) were facilitated by the Israeli authorities, two (3%) were partially facilitated, 34 (56%) were denied access, and six (10%) were postponed by aid organizations due to internal operational constraints. In an emerging pattern, the access of an additional nine missions (15%) was initially facilitated, but subsequently impeded as routes designated by the Israeli military proved to be unpassable, or due to the imposition of excessive delays prior to the departure of the missions or at checkpoints en route. Aid to South of Wadi Gaza: 57% of planned aid missions were facilitated. Of 114 planned missions to areas assessed as necessitating coordination to the south of Wadi Gaza, 65 (57%) were facilitated, one was partially facilitated, eight (7%) were initially facilitated but then impeded, 28 (25%) were denied access, and 12 (11%) were postponed internally. The 25% denial rate represents an increase compared with December 2023, where two (12%) of 16 missions were denied access. The 12 postponed missions, all destined for or returning from hospitals and humanitarian sites, were an emerging trend related to the geographical spread of military activities. The denials Included critical resupply missions to hospitals and to address unexploded ordnance (UXOs). Additionally, IDF Checkpoints that inspect aid often opened later than planned (even though the planned times were already inadequate) https://reliefweb.int/report/occupied-palestinian-territory/humanitarian-access-snapshot-gaza-strip-end-january-2024 Israel has also reportedly rejected items going into Gaza with no clear reason (even those with no ‘dual-use’ functions) https://youtu.be/bFRsRhkIHiw https://www.middleeastmonitor.com/20240201-un-israel-refusing-entry-of-aid-to-gaza-for-unclear-reasons/ Why can’t Israel starve Gaza? Well other than the fact it is deeply immoral, it is against several international laws to starve a civilian population as a method of warfare: “The starvation of the civilian population as a method of warfare is a serious violation of the laws and customs of war. This conduct has been prohibited under IHL since the adoption of two Additional Protocols (AP) to the Geneva Conventions.” https://starvationaccountability.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/11/Factsheet\_1\_Prohibition\_of\_Starvation\_EN.pdf “by 1919 the Report of the Commission on Responsibility set up after the First World War listed “deliberate starvation of civilians” as a violation of the laws and customs of war subject to criminal prosecution.[2] The prohibition of starvation as a method of warfare is codified in Article 54(1) of Additional Protocol I.[3] This provision was generally considered new at the time of the adoption of Additional Protocol I but since then has hardened into a rule of customary international law. Under the Statute of the International Criminal Court, “intentionally using starvation of civilians as a method of warfare” is a war crime in international armed conflicts.[4] The prohibition of starvation is set forth in numerous military manuals.[5] Starvation of civilians as a method of warfare is an offence under the legislation of many States.[6] This rule is also supported by official statements and other practice.[7] This practice includes that of States not, or not at the time, party to Additional Protocol I.[8] Contrary practice has been generally condemned or has been denied by the accused party.[9]” https://ihl-databases.icrc.org/en/customary-ihl/v1/rule53 Some have asserted Israel is weaponising starvation as a bargaining chip to get its hostages back. Again whether you think this is justified or not, it is clearly against international law (see above). Even if you think every adult in Gaza is linked to Hamas and has the ability to free hostages, 40% of Gaza are children under 14. Therefore, starving Gaza would lead to 800,000 children (under 14) not being able to eat. That’s 800,000 children who have no control over whether hostages are released or not being punished for the actions of Hamas. Statistically, only about 2% of Gaza are militants, obviously more people in Gaza will be connected to Hamas but we can realistically say that a majority of Gaza has no control over hostages being released. You may claim that these civilians should be focused on getting Hamas to release the hostages. Maybe, but they are probably more concerned about not dying and Israel plans to continue to attack Gaza even if the hostages are freed. Additionally, the people who have control over whether the hostages are released or not (Hamas, IJ etc.) have food stockpiled so preventing aid going into Gaza practically hurts everyone apart from the people that have the ability to free the hostages. So let me just make this clear: Stopping aid from going into Gaza will punish those who have the least amount of control of whether hostages are released or not. And even if starving the population of Gaza would force Palestinian civilians to encourage Hamas to release the hostages; it is still against international law. It is also important to note that many genocides (perhaps even most) have been committed through forced mass starvation/dehydration. Israel allowing some food into Gaza does not mean that it is not purposely causing mass starvation. For example, during the Holodmor in Ukraine (where 4 million people were killed through mass starvation), the Russians allowed the Ukrainians to eat some food just not enough to keep them alive. Is there any evidence Israel is using starvation against civilians in gaza as a weapon of warfare? There are several statements from Israeli government and IDF officials supporting starvation being used as a weapon of warfare (which is against several international laws). Here are some of them: https://twitter.com/ME\_Observer\_/status/1743067758374334571 Knesset member Tally Gotliv : "Without hunger and thirst among the Gazan population, we will not be able to recruit collaborators, we will not be able to recruit intelligence, we will not be able to bribe people, with food, drink, medicine, in order to obtain intelligence, and we know that finding the abductees is a supreme and super important goal alongside the goals of fighting." Israeli General Giora Eiland’s in an article in Yediot Ahronot calls for genocide “The international community warns of a humanitarian catastrophe in Gaza and of severe epidemics. We must not shy away from it, as hard as it is. After all, severe epidemics in the south of the Strip will hasten victory.” https://twitter.com/davidsheen/status/1726206510286647501?s=20 Israeli Army Colonel, Deputy Head of COGAT: speaking in a video filmed in Beit Lahia — one of the areas of Gaza which appears to have suffered particularly severe levels of destruction — and broadcast on Israeli television on 4 November 2023, Colonel Yogev Bar- Sheshet stated: “[w]hoever returns here, if they return here after, will find scorched earth. No houses, no agriculture, no nothing. They have no future;” another Army Colonel recorded in the same video, Colonel Erez Eshel (Reserve), also commented that: “Vengeance is a great value. There is vengeance over what they did to us … This place will be a fallow land. They will not be able to live here”. Tally Gotliv, MK for Likud Party “A brave government must announce that there is no deal[11]!! That’s it. There is no second chance for a terrorist organization that is playing with Israel. And from now, bombing without mercy! Full siege on Gaza! Until the Gazans beg we take the abductees and give them water and food supply. That is the language.” https://twitter.com/TallyGotliv/status/1727654112659915154 Amihai Eliyahu, Minister of Heritage in an interview to Israel Cohen and Kol Barma (Twitter, 5 November) "We would not give humanitarian aid to the Nazis. There is no such thing as non-involved in Gaza.” Question: So what? Should we drop an atomic bomb on all of Gaza? https://twitter.com/YakiAdamkestatus/1721050987526336964?s=20 What about food that is produced within Gaza? “Most cultivated fields have been destroyed, and accessing open areas during the war is dangerous in any case. Bakeries, factories and food warehouses have been bombed or shut down due to lack of basic supplies, fuel and electricity. Stockpiles in private homes, stores and warehouses have long since run out. In these conditions, the family and social support networks that helped residents at the beginning of the war collapsed, too.” https://www.btselem.org/gaza\_strip/20240108\_israel\_is\_starving\_gaza Israel used the temporary ceasefire as an opportunity to destroy agricultural land used to grow food. https://today.lorientlejour.com/article/1359638/israeli-army-razed-agricultural-land-during-truce-hrw-reports.html This is nothing new by the way. https://www.theguardian.com/world/2009/feb/01/gaza-food-crisis https://www.btselem.org/publications/summaries/200202\_policy\_of\_destruction Starvation problems made worse by Bakeries being bombed https://www.timesofisrael.com/liveblog\_entry/bakeries-smashed-in-gaza-bombardment-exacerbate-hunger-crisis/ What about the Israeli protestors blocking aid? There are some Israeli protesters blocking aid into Gaza. They have successfully delayed aid getting into Egypt and caused many trucks to be diverted but there is no evidence to prove they are causing a significant level of disruption. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FMjB4y32mXM It is clear however the IDF and Israeli police could be doing a lot more to prevent this from happening. They are certainly a lot more rough with Israeli citizens protesting the war. Can someone please explain to me why the Israeli police are far more rough when dispersing orthodox Jews opposing military conscription than they are with protesters blocking aid going into a starving population. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LyNt5f\_AKAA Why are the protestors blocking aid? Protesters believe that no aid should be allowed to go into Gaza until the hostages are released. Is this wrong? In my opinion using mass starvation as a weapon is abhorrent under any circumstances but even if you think it is justified, it is still against international law on many levels. TLDsummary: There are several factors leading to the humanitarian crisis in Gaza:

• Palestinian criminal gangs stealing food to sell them at extorted prices.
  
• Only 20% of the aid that is needed to go into Gaza at a bare minimum is being allowed in. This is partly because aid distributors themselves have suspended deliveries (about 10% of cases) but mainly because Israel rejects aid deliveries going into Gaza (about 40% of cases).
  
• Israel takes an extremely large amount of time to inspect aid.
  
• IDF destroying a majority of agricultural land/farmland (bulldozing much of it during the temporary ceasefire).
  
• IDF destroying bakeries.
  
• A small amount of aid being blocked/delayed due to Israeli protesters (which the police/IDF have been very relaxed about compared to other Israeli protests).
  
• It seems that many in Israel are against aid being sent into Gaza at all (almost 70% of all Israelis according to Israeli channel 12 survey) including many members of the the Knesset who have expressed a wish to use starvation as a method of warfare.
  
• Aid was not allowed into Gaza whatsoever for the first two weeks of the war and water was cut off to the Gaza strip for 10 days.
  
• No aid was let into the North of Gaza for over a month leading to children dying of starvation.
  

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NEWS RECAP

• [231219] Seola announced as part of Channel A's Drama 'Man and Woman' OST lineup
• [231220] Dayoung ranks 9th on Blip's annual schedules report

VIDEO RECAP

• [231219] Yeoreum's TikTok Update - EXO 'First Snow' Challenge
• [231219] Dayoung's TikTok Update - EXO 'First Snow' Challenge
• [231220] Seola - KBS CoolFM - STATION Z: 'A Deep Night with UJUNGs'
• [231220] Yeonjung - KBS Cool FM 'Chungha's Volume Up' ('Yeouido Roller Coaster' Corner)
• [231222] Seola (with CRAVITY's Taeyoung) - Stay (Channel A Drama 'Man and Woman' OST Highlight Medley)
• [231222] Yeoreum - 'CHEEKY Intro + SNAP (MAMA ver.)' Fancam 2023 Mnet Asian Music Awards
• [231222] Dayoung (with Weki Meki Yoojung) - 'Text Me Merry Christmas' cover (orig. Straight No Chaser feat. Kristen Bell)
• [231222] Dayoung, Yeonjung - Idol professionals who are serious about chicken have gathered together🍗(feat. WJSN & CRAVITY) SBS 'EAT SHOW Season 2' Episode 5-1
• [231222] Dayoung, Yeonjung - Halal Food Tier 1✨WJSN & CRAVITY rip up the lamb! Chew into the eating show 🍖 SBS 'EAT SHOW Season 2' Episode 5-2
• [231222] Dayoung, Yeonjung - A seafood series that targets Dr. Chew Chew’s taste 🍴 CRAVITY's secret guest? A puppy? Hyeongjun's back★ SBS 'EAT SHOW Season 2' Episode 5-3
• [231222] Dawon - 'not your fault' cover (orig. yaeow)
• [231223] Dayoung - Japanese curry with maple syrup?! Korea’s First Yaki Curry Restaurant🍛 MBC every1 'Muksuldan' Episode 10
• [231224] Luda - Merry Christmas~ (ENG SUB)
• [231224] WJSN - 2023 Christmas Message (Special Clip)
• [231224] Yeoreum's TikTok Update

Wiki Part Twenty-Nine Part Thirty-One
I threw the stable door open and found cherubim metaphorically dusting for prints.
“Am I interrupting, or can I start packing?”
They shook their heads and waved me in. I quickly started visually cataloging the contents, though I was distracted by Pyroshir being fully animate.
“Hey, you’re already awake, that’s great. Listen–”
“I know,” he interrupted.
“Oh?”
He shook his mane, slinging a few sparks. “Brotha, the tea is pipin’. I can’t sleep with the hottest gossip flyin’. Some mo’fucka busted on in, ate a million, billion, gajillion damage, and walked his ass out like it was anotha Tuesday. We gots ta fuckin’ bounce.”
I paused, appreciating our alignment on the issue. “Great, cuz that’s the plan. I’ve got a hideaway lined up, though it’s probably not good to discuss it here. Unfortunately, I have to catch orb you for a while, m’kay?”
He rolled his eyes with a snort. “Beats gettin’ left behind, or blasted. Hit me.”
“Thanks, mate. I’ll pop you out somewhere nice, I promise.”
“Suuuuurrrrrr–” ZHWOOMP
I scooped up the orb, already moving on to the next thing. I grabbed all the saddles, barding, care equipment, his ball scratcher… until I came to a very important pouch. The Freedom Cookies—as we called them—the crystals to dispel whatever controls Pyroshir. We’d made it a short way toward my objective of enough free will to say no sometimes. Of course I would take them, and yet, I hesitated. A number of deep thoughts about my own morality swirled as I contemplated where my line used to be, and where it had moved to by then.
“Dennis! They say we can pack the house in 5 minutes!” Matti shouted, breaking my introspective trance.
“Okay, be right there!”
……
Laying low, day 1, Department of Extra Infernal Affairs, Temporary Internment Wing, late evening.
“What is this, a prison cell?” Matti grumbed indignantly.
“I mean, it’s dual-purpose… I guess.”
Honestly, I couldn’t disagree. Our temporary accommodations were aptly described as a cell. 3 walls of reinforced brick, 1 of heavy bars, a pair of planks chained to the wall, vaguely suggestive in the general direction of a bed. Aaand a toiled in the corner, with a curtain and a sink. We had been assured that the door would remain unlocked, and that the facilities were available. Downside was, we couldn’t bring the bed, so it was time to get creative with our stock of blankets and cushions.
“Eh, ‘sgood nuff.”
……
Laying low, day 2, rocky valley outside of deliberately unnamed town, shortly after lunch break.
“Alright, now that you’ve turned it on, you need to take a firm grip like this. Your main hand should go all the way at the bottom of the shaft, with your ring and pinkie fingers curled up to serve as a backstop. Your off hand goes right up front, just behind this little ring of pearls, but make sure you’re not touching them!”
“Okay, okay… like this?”
“Good grip, maybe come back on the off hand a bit. That’s the trigger, after all. Now, there are 4 settings, and it takes a little care, so listen up. Pushing the pearl ring forward is continuous stream mode, your shorter range, sustainable option. Pulling it back towards you will engage burst mode. The longer you hold it back, the more it charges, the bigger the effect. Next, to change firing mode–”
“Wait wait wait,” Matti interrupted. “Alternate firing modes?”
I spun around to give her a mild glare, sitting there on that rock next to Hecate, the metaphorical peanut gallery to my training session with a valued employee.
“Yes, what about them?” I asked, swinging my trainer rod around haphazardly.
She fidgeted. “Well, they’re supposed to be cheap and uniform. They’re mass produced, after all. I’ve never seen or heard of a volcano rod that could do more than spew a line or cone of fire.”
“Yeah, that’s the FP-24, FP-24A-1, and maybe the FP-24D. We use the FP-26A-3.”
“... What?”
I inhaled and that’s about as far as I got before Hecate beat me to it.
“Ms. Runil, what is so difficult to understand? His company spent the time and money to commission a more suitable, higher grade model of fire weapon. An admirable pursuit. Now, let him finish what he is doing,” she stated with a stern smile.
For someone with everything above their lips obscured, Hecate sure was expressive. I looked between them and shrugged.
“Yeah, what she said. I’ll tell you more once Greesley is actually practicing.”
And that’s precisely what I did. I explained the 4 settings, and what each one does in stream or burst mode. Setting 1: Firewall. Stream fires a cone of fire in a 120 degree arc at a range of 10 feet, charge places a stationary blaze that expands up, down, and sideways to block off a corridor; duration dependent on time charging and space filled. Setting 2 is a variable cone that trades width for range as you turn the pearls, and you can charge to launch a flaming donut. Works like a shotgun.
Setting 3 is flamethrower mode. It has 3 sub-settings, no gravity, gravity, and gravity with ricochets. You can use it to paint the battlefield with napalm hazards, which burn for a minute or so. You can charge it to launch a molotov bomb that leaves a large puddle of fire, and also obeys the rules of the subsetting. The 4th and final setting is projectile mode. Stream mode fires low-damage firebolts at 384 RPM, and you can charge it for an oh-so-classic fireball.
To recharge a rod, just place it in an open fire until it whistles like a teapot. If you want to utilize it as a primary weapon, consider the FP-26A-5 Battle, with a tripled battery life; or perhaps you would like FP-26A-4 Sidearm, which has the same features as the A-3, but at half the size (not recommended for untrained and/or non GC usage due to excessive recoil).
Chivos has informed me that I must disclose my 25% cut of the profits from this model, as the sole commissioner of the FP-26 design. Spoilsport. For real, though, I spent some fat stacks on making these and they’re good. You have to order ahead and get on a waitlist to get one due to their batch manufacturing. For your very own FP-26, call Thermul and Sons now!
But I’m not done yet!
…
Actually, I am, but after a spiel like that, I had to say it. Sue me (you’ll lose).
……
Laying low, day 2, late afternoon, outskirts of Drivellum-Lawson estate.
My ear twitched as a familiar screech of metal resounded. “Yup, that’s the front gate alright.”
“Finally,” Matti grumbled. “Would’ve been nice to see the countryside.”
I rolled my eyes. She was still hung up on the curtains drawn edict. “Oh come off it, Matti. They say nobody sees in, then nobody sees in. Besides, we’re stopping at about the nicest mansion around.”
“It better be. I wanted to see the sights.”
5 minutes later.
“Waddya think, Matti? … Hello? Earth to vampire?” I inquired, nudging a gawking Matti.
I didn’t hold her dumbstruck mouth-agape look against her. It was, after all, quite a sight to behold… which is why I need to now describe it, lest there be a riot. The mansion itself was the expected centerpiece of the property. It was 3 stories plus attic, with walls of deep gray hewn stone brick, with every single brick hand-engraved in a subtle but entrancing pattern that flowed seamlessly across the entire exterior.
The roof was steep and imposing, built from fireblood shingles, the nuances of which would take too long to explain. Long story short, it’s a deep red-orange color and can illuminate dimly, or project enough fire to light the entire property; a real crowd pleaser for large outdoor parties. The exterior was plastered with windows, each of which had thin metal barring that carried on the artistic pattern of the bricks, whilst also proofing them against intruders.
The construction was mostly rectangular on the front, but it was a blocky, horseshoe-shaped mansion that wrapped around a square/plaza of sorts. At the center of said plaza was a fountain that—depending on what company needed to be impressed—could spout water, lava, blood, chocolate, or booze. There were also 4 cherry trees, 1 per corner of the square. They were kept in a perpetual rotation, with each corner being in a different season. It kept the place dotted with cherry blossoms and fruits year round.
Some final details about the mansion itself: There were 2 short towers on opposite ends of the horseshoe, the left accessible from the master bedroom and the right from the 3rd floor reception hall. The left was a bell and clock tower with a balcony, and the right was an observation tower with a planetarium. The roofs of the towers also flew long, thin flags of our family heraldry. The tip of the fabric could break the sound barrier in a windstorm, or when commanded. Total square footage: 22,800.
Not to mention the grounds of the estate. The left of the not-driveway was populated with local flora, red, gray, orange, and yellow plants, ash trees—made of actual ash—with their shimmering leaves and lovely flowers that smolder so softly, alight with the little igneous butterflies that pollinate them.
On the right, we had surface flora, with normal grass, hedges, trees, etc. Not very new or fancy for me, but very exotic to keep a whole 17 acres of it with orchards and gardens and the like. And yes, it did take up precisely half of the 34-acre property, the maximum allowable privately owned land plot. For more information, google demon rule [joke redacted].
“Wow.”
“That’s it, just wow?”
She shook her head and spluttered. “I– I mean wow! I thought mansions were so last century, but… there’s something about this, so castle-like, but, so formal and personal. With so much given to pleasure, rather than defensibility.”
“Ahem,” I cleared my throat, pointing at the ‘fence line’, which had a barrier not dissimilar to the one I cast over Castle Sidia for her a while back.
She glanced over her shoulder and took it in. “Hmm. That does explain some things. But still, I– oh, who’s that?”
I followed her gaze over to the hell pastures and saw a 3-headed black and red dog of 20-some stone galloping at us, tongues flapping in the wind.
“That would be Bear, the security cerberus. We should probably go inside before he… serenades us.”
“What?” she blurted, squinting at him jogging over.
I saw the realization dawn on her face as she noticed that all 3 heads were huskies. She very eagerly took the ‘important stuff’ bag I handed her, and we started toward the door. Thankfully, the genie lamp on my belt flashed alight and Hecate formed to greet the eager pup. The seraphim proceeded to make a ball of flame, and throw it far over his head. Bear, of course, gave chase and returned in moments carrying it in his mouth.
And that was how she discovered her primary pastime for the duration of our stay. That, and the library.
We got the tour, of course. Chivos wasn’t home, but his butler took our bags and showed us about. He and the chef were the only employees not placed on leave for security. I had seen it all before, but it wasn’t completed at the time; it took several years to accumulate the wealth, and construction took 8 years.
The insides were marble-floored, vaulted-ceilinged extravagance incarnate. however, it was quite tasteful. There was not too much decoration. The halls were dotted with the occasional painting or display piece, the floor patterns had a different geometer commissioned for each wing of the house, and the higher floors used a mix of fine quartz and obsidian tile, or well-stained wood and rugs. The lighting, of course, was done by chandeliers in large spaces, and soul candles wherever needed. Those were a straight-up flex, because each one needed the entire soul of a sinner to make, and there were hundreds across the house.
We saw the atrium, ballroom, theatre, library, armory, dining halls, indoor exotic garden, reading nook, study, grand office, trophy room, wine cellar, sex dungeon, dungeon dungeon, security room, master bed and bath, both towers, alchemical workshop, servant’s quarters, secret passages, panic rooms, and the closed vault. The latter of that list would only open for Chivos, or me in the event of his death. He once told me there’s enough—entirely legal—blackmail stored within to install a president of his choice. I wasn’t entirely sure he was joking (ehh, 90%).
It also contained the thornheart nexus, a massive gem which amounted to the magical server that my wedding ring queried spells from.
The tour ended with us flopped onto the smallest non-servant bed in the house, an Alaskan king. Why the smallest? Because it was the relatively compact ‘super turbo extra ultra deluxe’ security bedroom; the only room safe enough that every faction was willing to let me have privacy. That did not mean I was alone, though.
“What a place!” Matti opined as the fellow pancake on the bed. “I can’t believe that you don’t spend more time down here.”
“Ehh, nice as it is, the ambiance is not great. Even this far into a secure property, you can still hear the wails of the damned when it gets quiet.”
“I know, it’s awesome!” She paused, realizing our mismatch. “Emm, on another note, why is this place so secure? All the measures we’ve seen have been installed for years.”
“Because, Matti, Chivos obtained the same legal protections as a GC the moment we married. He’s nearly untouchable now, so the biggest cheats, scammers, and backstabbers in all the Hells hire him; they’re his main clientele.”
“Hmm. If he’s involved with people like that, it really does explain things.” She sighed in fluffy-pillowed bliss. “Do you… want to do anything right now?”
“Yeah, sleep,” I drawled tiredly as I reached for the alarm clock and wound it to ‘1 REM cycle’.
……
The soft, gentlemanly rapping of Mr. Slakendroth’s knuckles raised our attention from our books.
“Enter!”
He peeked his head in, dapper white mustache ever lively in its curled tips. “Masters Lawson and Runil, I have come to inform you that Master Drivellum has returned, and that dinner will be ready shortly. He has requested that you come meet him at the table.”
A few minutes later we were closing in on the private dining room, as the far grander dining hall was simply too much for 3. We were ostensibly headed straight there, but I made a slight detour when I spotted Hecate. She sat at a small table in a side room, likely used by the waitstaff. Across from her was an ‘empty’ chair, with a full place setting.
“Heyyy,” I greeted somewhat awkwardly. “Bit of a breath of fresh air not having you following. Is the place really that well up to standards?”
She paused her origami napkin swan. ‘It very much is. Agent ______ and I have swept all about. There will be no fools to cremate here. We have even verified that the teleportation room has been shut off, and thoroughly barred. It is of no concern, though I would have had more time to play with Bear had they let us use it first.“
Mr. Droth bowed humbly. “Our sincerest apologies, my lady. The authorities insisted it be shut down before your arrival. I am sure you can understand this most unfortunate predicament.”
“Indeed,” she concurred. Then her ears perked. “Ah, our food is here.”
Right then, a brass automaton strode into the room, depositing 2 covered dishes on the table. With a small flair, it plucked the covers to reveal a fine steak with very minimal sides for Hecate, and a masterful omurice with a side of caviar for the wind.
“Seraphim need to eat?” Matti asked, breaking her silence.
“No, but when presented with such fine craftsmanship, why not partake?” She cut a slice of steak and inspected it on her fork. “Mmm, charred on the outside, bleeding on the inside. Perfection. Butler, please deliver my compliments to the chef.”
“At my earliest opportunity, Madam. Masters, if you please?” he requested, motioning us onward.
As we departed, I saw Hecate light the candle at their table with a snap of her fingers. “So, have you ever committed arson?” I heard her asking from down the hall.
……
“Welcome home, Chivos,” I greeted as he arrived at our table.
He was the most casually dressed I’d seen him in a long time; slacks and a button down shirt. He was also more exhausted than I’d seen in just about ever, but that’s not saying much because we don’t have time to meet in person when he’s swamped.
“Hello, Dennis, Mattirina. I have had quite a day.” His tone certainly said what kind of day.
“So no dice, then?”
He rang the bell at the table, causing the automaton to approach and take our drink orders.
“There is some good news. I’ve pushed back a number of cases; any of the ones that won’t find more evidence to damage our argument. And for some I have convinced my client to go for the throat. Hopefully, I can finish a number of them while you are still here. I can afford to let some billable hours go.”
I nodded, taking a sip of my rapidly-delivered hard lemonade. “I very much appreciate your efforts on that front. Now, the bad news?”
“A visa application for a long-term stay will take at least a month. Thus, we will have to find you other accommodations as soon as possible. And it best not be anywhere important within the lands of light or darkness, as the other side would throw such a fit that your safety could be put at risk.” He took a slice of the foccacia the moment it was delivered. “Have you any suggestions? I would more than welcome them.”
Surprisingly, Matti spoke first. “Madame Gossamer?” We both shot her a glare, but she raised her hand. “No, seriously. Remember that letter I gave you, Dennis? The fan mail? It was… also an explanation of the situation, and an invitation to the ‘protect Dennis if shit goes down’ club.”
We both blinked at her. “I believe my husband would be in better hands elsewhere, though I do not doubt her efficacy. It shall be considered if all else fails, yes?”
“Yyyeah. Plan Z right there. Here’s my idea. The 2082nd Battle of Meridian Valley is in 4 days. Lots of people and chosen will be there, too many to go after me safely, as long as I stay guarded or in the public eye. You know I go every year I can, having all those factions to rub elbows with. There are a few groups there that owe me. I could get you a pretty good list of hideaway candidates, and, with the right strategies, we could try to suss out if anyone there is stalking me.”
Chivos slowly nodded. “Hmm. Interesting, though a bit on the bold side. A few agents responsible for you may have a conniption, but I think it could be beneficial. I should commence a conference call posthaste.”
Right then, a plate of ice-fried magmafish with roasted macadamia slivers and oyster pilaf was placed before him. (Yes, you cook magmafish by cooling it down.) He took a deep breath, halfway stood.
“After dinner, perhaps.”
……
Laying low, day 3, morning, super ultra giga lots of words security bedroom.
“I can’t believe he stole my favorite coat,” I whined.
Matti sat on the bed, cross-legged, in her nighty, watching me lay out all my equipment. “All the magic items the thief made off with, and your coat is the most upsetting?”
I clutched my near-bare collarbone facetiously. “Yes! It was a gift.”
Nonplussed, she switched her pose about to rest on her belly, head propped up on her hands, feet up in the air, kicking back and forth. “Anyhow, what is this ‘PVP’ you were on about?”
“How do you fight a monster?”
“Uhh–”
I held up a finger. “Don’t answer the question. Just think of a monster that takes some thought to kill. Once you recall how you would take it down, I’ll ask you the real question.”
She willfully played along. “Alright, I have a beast in mind. Ask.”
“Would that strategy work on a chosen?”
Matti paused, then shook her head. “I’m fairly certain I would die.”
“Ayup. That’s exactly why I’m switching from an anti-monster kit, to an anti-chosen kit.”
She interlaced her fingers under her chin, trying to appear cute. “Pray tell, what sort of strategy works against the chosen?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know, weather girl?” I retorted snarkily.
Matti sneakily slid off the bed and came up behind me to knock me on the elbow for my insolent tone. However, I happen to have ears and a sense of comedic timing, so I jerked my arm aside and trapped her overextended wrist against my body. Then, I did a little pirouette and sent her slinging into the chair beside me. She was briefly shocked, sitting there not of her own volition.
“Sometimes, I forget that you are still a chosen, and quite a fast one at that.”
“You’ve seen me walk softly, but have never seen my big stick.” I paused. “That is not the best way to use that phrase.”
She leaned forward. “Innuendo aside, I am still curious, and I may be pitted against these chosen in your protection. Please, I desire enlightenment.”
I nodded to myself. “Fair point. Alright, listen up then. The strategies that work best against the chosen are the ones that would be most effective against as many different threats as possible. The so-called trump-card strategies. There are 3 categories to these strats. Total avoidance, overwhelming force, and catastrophic disruption.”
Her features lit up as she suddenly turned highly attentive. “Go on.”
“Total avoidance is sneaking around, teleporting away, not getting involved in the first place, et cetera. We’re already putting that into practice, but the wind personifies it. He clearly has the option to grab me and portal us out at any time.
“Overwhelming force is even simpler. If you attack harder and faster than anyone can put up with, then you win. Surviving the fight is the tricky part. Hecate is a great example. She has no subtlety, nor any grand plan. She sees, she burns, she wins.
“Those are the common strategies, the easiest to be somewhat prepared for. But catastrophic disruption? By definition, it is not possible to prepare for. And that… that is my specialty here.”
Matti blinked. “Well?”
“Picture this:” I said. “I am battling against a party of 5. They have formed a defensive circle, as I am spinning about them rapidly in a ring of conjured darkness. I zip in and out, striking at them and falling back to the shadows. They have sustained a few hits, but now are predicting me. I strike again and am run through on a warrior’s blade, but no! It was an illusion! I had turned invisible and let him take my place after the first block.
“I stand among them now, in the center of their circle. I cast explosive reaction on myself, then stab the mage with a dagger coated in psychedelics. The knight cleaves his weapon into me, which is deflected in the ensuing blast. The entire party is thrown every which way. I cast featherweight upon the knight as he careens through the air, then hyperdash and shoulder check him into the atmosphere.
“As they regain formation, I target the healer with a number of spells that he can easily deflect. At the same time, I mix in firecrackers that look and feel like spells when deflected. When he realizes the feint, and ceases wasting mana on the deflection, I hit him with a wand of long distance random teleportation. 2 foes removed, 1 incapacitated.”
As I finished my hypothetical, and idealized scenario, I returned my focus to Matti, whose face was flush as she bit her lip and fidgeted in her chair. “I didn’t know you could scheme so well! It’s so hot.”
I wrinkled my nose, electing to take the next chance to kill the mood a bit. “Well, boyfriend material theory continues. Any questions?”
“Hmm, which of the 3 would you say I specialize in?” she asked, pushing past her arousal.
“I’d say you’re a balance of all 3, which is exactly what GCs are most experienced with. And that is why you are at severe risk of getting your teeth kicked in if you go up against them.”
Yup, that killed her mood alright. That was the objective, after all. But it was quickly forgotten as I gave her a tour of all my odd and exotic magic equipment… that hadn’t been stolen. We had fun with my collection of throwables, spitballing AoE combinations that could cause the most chaos. Then I found the Dancer’s Naginata and she simply had to try it, cutting polearms being her favorite. I sat down to enjoy the show.
Even with the limited space of the bedroom, she could make such graceful motions; planting the haft in the floor and flipping high, spinning about the pole like a seductive dancer, and making thrusts so fast that they simply couldn’t be done by mortal arms. The naginata clearly liked her too, because the magic kicked in all the way, boosting her speed, grace, and triggering the curse. It’s not a bad one, but…
She landed in front of me, caressing my cheek. “Watashitachi no kodomo-tachi ga yaki tsukusudearou ōchō o sōzō shite mite kudasai.”
I stood up and snatched the naginata from her hands. “Okay. Sorede jūbundesu.”
My fingers relinquished the semi-cursed polearm to lean against the wall and I shuddered at the fuzz-brained sensation. “Guh, that’s still weird. What did you say, Matti?”
I spied a rapidly hidden blush as I turned around. “I’m… not sure,” she lied, blatantly.
“Oh, alright,” I conceded, happy to drop the subject and return to loadout-building.
But the horny never left. As I toured her through my armory of death, deception, and destruction, she grew less and less focused. Eventually, I was telling her the story of the time I body-swapped with an ice titan using a flipside coin—with said spent coin in its display case—when she abruptly jumped over to straddle my lap. She also threw her arms around my shoulders.
“A plan for every occasion, and a dozen weapons too! You would make a perfect villain, a dastardly spy who steals and connives and murders with no one to stop him. You have no idea how fucking hot it is.”
I raised an eyebrow at her. “I dunno, I think I have a pretty good estimate.”
I decided to stand up to slide her off my lap, but that just ended with us standing in roughly the same predicament. My expression went a bit smarmy. “I think it’s about time you let go.”
“What if I do not wish to?”
We matched eyes, and I plotted out my next moves carefully. “You really think you’re in charge here?” I challenged. “I could twist you up like a pretzel.”
She sprouted a devious smirk, before vanishing into a cloud of mist. Oh-so predictable, I thought to myself as I waited a split second before hyperdashing 3 feet backwards. Matti reformed in front of me, grabbing at where I just was. But she was not prepared. I grabbed her from behind, and, before she could react, pulled her chin up and planted a hickey on her neck.
Instantly, she turned to jelly. I had asserted myself completely, precisely as the succubal handbooks foretold. She reached weakly to push me off, but I snatched the wrist and punished her by sucking even harder, eliciting an excited moan. Then I released my liplock to taunt her.
“Still think you’re in charge here?”
I held her mouth shut, forcing a less dignified response. “Mm-mmm.”
“Good girl,” I whispered in her ear before licking her neck, causing another spasm of excitement.
Then, I kneed her in the back, sending her stumbling onto the bed. Before she could collect herself, I jumped up and planted my foot on the small of her back.
“I want you to tell me something, Matti. I haven’t decided if you’re a good girl; coming to protect me, baking nice treats and planning fun dates, saving towns in my stead and following all the little rules…”
I rolled her over with my foot and placed it on her cheek, pressing her head into the soft mattress. “Or maybe you’re a bad girl. Lying to me, messing with my minions, spying on me, using me for your own ends…”
I leaned forward, pressing on her face harder still. “So, Matti. Are you a good girl, who should be rewarded, or a bad girl, who must be… punished?”
Now, despite your curiosity, I’m going to have to censor this part. Why? Well, Matti doesn’t want all her embarrassing secrets leaked. Plus, I’m not trying to raise the age rating… more than I already have. Safe to say, I showed her just how much the succubi taught me, and the wide assortment of sexy things I could do to her that didn’t involve me doing any of the icky stuff. The power dynamic was pretty fun.
A little while later, I was seated in a chair, with about 30 minutes before my departure to do more Golden Point wrap-up stuff. Matti was showering for obvious reasons, so I had some time to myself. I looked through my equipment some more, then found the still-packed bag from my trip to the Azure Sea. I paused, reaching in and fishing out the drone, with the turret removed and all tied up with sacred sealing talismans. It shook angrily at my touch. I decided to make a call.
“... Hello? … Yeah, hi. I’ve got a special-case celestial emergency, can you please transfer me? … Yes, really. … Alright, scan away.” I felt a lie detection spell pass through the call.
“... Great, thanks. … Hi, Dennis Lawson speaking. Who would I speak to about shoggoths? … No, they do, in fact, exist. … How do I– I’m fucking looking at one right now! … Thank you. … Hello? … Oh, um, Hi, Grunnus. Imma get straight to the point with you. I’ve caught a shoggoth.”
There was a long pause. “... Yes, really. I know there’s a removal initiative and all, but I wasn’t expecting to get transferred to you of all people. … Yeah, I’ve got it right here. Feel free to take it, though I would like the container back after.”
Right then, the drone vanished off the table without a sound. “Got it? … Okay, great. What’s the reward for those things? … Waddya mean? … Off the books? You’re a god, who is above you to get you in trouble? … Yeah, yeah, I’ve heard that before, and from my own mouth too. … Is there really no way you can pay me? … Priceless? I doubt it, but it’s better than nothing, I guess. … Yeah, thanks. Take care.”
I hung up the stones, frustrated. Whatever celestial politicking I had stepped in was a bit too deep to argue with. I was, however, about to learn Grunnus’ definition of ‘priceless’.
A fwoomp signaled the arrival of my reward. A piece of glossy paper floated down into my grasp. It was a picture, but animated. The shoggoth was in one corner, slightly cowering before Grunnus, who—in his spiky full plate armor—was perfectly reenacting ‘OH SHIT, A RAT’, complete with thrown greaves and a collision with the camera at the end. I flipped it over and read the scrawled handwriting on the back.
To: Main Character
Apologies for my inability to pay for services rendered. I hope this was worth the trouble, and is as good as promised. (It will loop until the end of time, tap to restart and enable audio for 1 loop.)
-Grunnus O’Deilan
P.S. If you see another, please just call me first.
I played the audio and admired his impression of the original video. “Huh… not bad. You did alright with this,” I finished complimenting.
Then the drone reappeared, about 4 feet lower than the ceiling, and smashed the table to splinters with the fall.
I sighed.
……
Laying low, day 3, mid afternoon, Golden Point office.
“Enter!”
Cam peeked in the office door. “Heya, Boss. Do you have a minute to catch up?”
I shrugged and turned to Pokle, who was still not quite filling the space in my former office. “Be alright on your own for a bit?”
She did not look up from her sorting of papers. “I should be fine. Go ahead.”
I guided us to the break room between the manager offices and drew the curtains.
“So, nice to see you back from the field. Have you gotten the low-down on what’s going on?”
“Yeah, it sounds like you got caught up in the plot. I heard your house got broken into and there was a big fuss about it around town. Now you’re doing the disappearing act and we have a bunch of new security measures at the office.”
I sat in the lower napping hammock. “Yup, that pretty much sums it up. Sorry you had to get caught up in this, but, guilty by association I guess. Hope you don’t mind some ‘friends’ looking over your shoulder for a while.”
He shrugged. “I’ll deal. It’s a shame that I won’t be the Robin to your Batman anymore.”
“True, no more co-adventures. Umm… well, we could do 1 more. The thingy, in a couple days.”
He grimaced. “Wouldn’t that paint a target on my back?”
“I mean… you’re already top 5 targets for this shadowy group. We’ve palled around a lot since I did the thing that started the trouble, so it probably wouldn’t make a difference.”
He considered it a moment. “Eh, fuck it, why not. Do I get a bodyguard?”
“You already have 2.”
I returned to Pokle’s office a few minutes later. “Hey, could you free up Cam for 48 hours 3 days from now?”
“Uhh–”
“Great, thanks.”
……
Laying low, day 3, evening, The Marbled Platter (#17 on the fine dining list across all the Hells).
We were seated in the VIP room at the back of the restaurant, menus already waiting on the table for 5. I had Chivos to my left, Matti to the right, and here I am, stuck in the middle with you. Hecate and the hitherto nameless gust sat across from us.
“Wooow…” Matti whispered as she read a piece of the menu that I didn’t have. I leaned over and she took the cue to read aloud.
“Cabernet sanguine, spiced. Select wine grapes mixed with earthy, thought-provoking spices and the willingly-given blood of a virgin who saved herself for a perished lover, never to consummate. Aged in applewood for 17 years.”
“Swanky.”
“Either that or Tears of the Fallen Grace. A mixed red berry liqueur with the blood of a noble priest who gave in to sin and led his flock astray. Aged in oak for 212 years.”
“Why choose? Have both,” Chivos offered casually.
“At this…” she looked closer. “No prices. That must–”
“Money is no object, my dear. Choose what pleases you.”
Right then, the manager walked in, dressed to be our primary waiter for the night. Slacks, vest, bowtie, slicked hair, polished horns… and a look of sheer shock and indignation.
“An angel? We do not permit your kind here. Please leave the premises.”
Hecate did not budge, but the entire table became quite tense. “My presence here is entirely legal, and is necessary for official business.”
“Irrelevant. We do not serve angels. Please see yourself out, or I will have you removed.”
Chivos was about to handle the situation, but Hecate hushed him, something few ever got away with. She stood and slowly stepped towards the door. Or perhaps the manager standing next to the door. His expression was a bit too smug for his own good.
“Thank you for your cooper–”
The wings covering Hecate’s eyes opened, and she stared him down. He backed against the wall as she placed a hand by his head.
“Your petty discriminations are meaningless to me. Before there was heaven or hell, there was only fire. It was pure, and beautiful. In time it bore the soothing, life giving sun to the sky, and sweltering destruction of the core. They are one and the same.”
He mustered the chutzpah needed to retort, but only got as far as “You–”
“I have seen the world before demon or angel were conceptualized,” she raved angrily. “All was born in fire and ash, and when the end times come all will once more return to fire and ash. Saints and sinners, man, woman, child, demon, angel, all will be reduced to cinders. And I will taste every. last. one.”
There was a long, dead silence. “But, in the meantime, I would instead like to taste your flank steak, with onions.”
At that, she straightened up, covered her eyes again, and returned to her seat at the table. The manager promptly slid out of the room, as his dapper dress had been… soiled. The table was expectedly quiet for a minute.
“Why onions?” Matti asked. “It’s already quite a plate.”
“Sulfur.”
……
P.S. As an olive branch to said manager, I would like to specify that by 'soiled', I meant that his whites were too damp with sweat to remain in dress code. I would've laughed my ass off if he actually peed his pants.
​

Afterword

Wiki Part Twenty-Nine Part Thirty-One
The Cover Art
ko-fi art fund

[Previous] [Next]
Author’s Note:
—
Thank you for your patience, and thank you for the feedback!
A lot of things have happened since October 10th, but I’m here now!
AS ALWAYS, CHAPTER ILLUSTRATION IS IN THE COMMENTS! This time, it’s a double!
Thanks to u/SpacePaladin15 for writing Nature of Predators and allowing fanfiction of his work to exist!
Some references to Foundations of Humanity by u/cruisingNW!
Some references to Recipe For Disaster by u/YakiTapioca!
Some references to Nature of a Giant by u/Acceptable_Egg5560! A significant reference to the Stonebuilder myth by u/Thirsha_42!
BIG THANKS to everybody who proofread and critiqued my work!
—
Memory transcription subject: Galeto, Middle-Aged Venlil, Chief Exterminator of the Stepping Stones District Precinct
Date recorded [standardized human time]: April 14, 2136 (3 months before first contact)
[Creating a context table at the end of this transcription…]
[Done! Transcription is starting.]
Clunk.
Feeling pensive, I nonetheless turned my right paw.
Click.
A door bearing my name creaked open to show my office, adorned with various knick-knacks acquired from working a long career—mostly just plaques, the small thanks, the like. Some of these brought good memories; others were memories I didn’t want to think about. At least I know which gifts were genuine, not lip service. The sun shone through the sole window of my office, illuminating the map behind my desk. It took up the whole wall, depicting the island chain and its name under it.
The map invariably evoked the folks’ local legend, where it's believed that {Stonebuilder} created the very islands while on his relentless search for extraordinary stones across the known world as a result of a dramatic cave-breaking incident while collecting the sturdiest rocks. Stonebuilder inadvertently brought a fearsome, literally flaming predator out of the cave into the daylight and shallow water.
Stonebuilder had to subdue the creature by using some of the rocks he had collected from the water-treading cave he had ventured through earlier, further pinning it under the rocks and water when he walked over them to collect more cave rocks. The rocks, hence, became the Stepping Stones archipelago, as the locals tell it.
Regardless, I shook my head clear of irrelevant thoughts, as there were more pertinent things to think about today. As I stepped into my office and began to walk to my desk, I went past the window’s direct view.
The window showed a large assortment of buildings downhill before giving away to the ocean and its twinkling light, with this district’s other islands still in view by the horizon, with mountain ranges hugging the frame.
The plants further adorned the window via a receptacle holding dirt, and they boldly dared to look at the sun.
If they truly knew me, they would know my favorite gifts would be plants. They signified progress and time well spent. The will to grow despite their fragility.
But as of now, the sight failed to reassure me.
A sigh escaped my lips. As the relevant thoughts danced across my mind, I began turning the slice of Strayu in my left paw, having only hesitated in walking briefly.
Sometimes, simple regulatory laws and procedures are led astray by acts of the stars, and the end product could sometimes be… labyrinthine in its tedium.
And this… individual never ceased to be a supplier of endless paperwork.
Sitting at my desk, I decided to chew on my slice of Strayu today, just not to do the same to my workplace office’s writing implements.
It was relatively early in my paw today, despite the eternal gaze of the sun shining to the right of my desk, no thanks to the current task that came to my attention.
I would have at least liked another half-claw of sleep, but time never waited for anyone after all.
Nonetheless, I didn’t feel drained today, only disappointed.
I looked at my desk’s terminal and reviewed the files and their metadata sent during my rest.
Whether or not I was ready, it was time to start the process.
I whistled for the two other members of the escort to come in.
When their paw starts again, Cinamy and Jeerim can put in their two cents.
The door to my left opened, and both Venlil twins walked in, clearly shaken by something, and I could guess as to what.
“First time?” I asked, wondering about their temperament.
Despite their shaking, they both nodded, leading me to continue.
I just cleared my throat as I was to begin my examination. My throat still felt dry, so I pulled out some {Gold Nectar} since I couldn’t drink alcohol while working claws.
This brand was far from the worst if I had to get a substitute.
This thing’s drank by pups of the families around here.
I popped it open and looked at the golden hue of the bottle’s liquids being lit by the sun before quenching my thirst.
Seeing that the pair of them still had wobbly legs, I just calmly raised my tail, stilling to signal “steady.”
“So, care to tell me the news?” I said, resting on a closed paw and elbow.
The pair then looked at each other, but one twin motioned to the other with his tail, and the other stepped forward.
They were only distinct from each other by how they styled their head of wool, having shortened one side. As it seemed, they picked opposite sides.
“Well, sir, we’re here to brief you about Muller’s Bay,” the left Venlil twin said.
“That [podunk] on the mainland near the Burning?” I asked.
“Y-Yes, sir,” my subordinate replied.
I just took another bite out of my slice of Strayu.
“Well, what about it? I assume another district’s folly is only for me to tolerate because of one specific reason. Is it that reason?”
“Yes, sir,” the left twin affirmed.
“Fantastic,” I curtly said before I continued.
“Well, fill me in. We also got a video to review, boys,” I requested.
[Previous memory transcript’s information is overlapping, omitting duplicate statements of information…]
Crack!
The twins both flinched, but I stared at the glowing, humming light of the display, having seen this before already.
Through a slightly trembling body-camera, it depicted a seething [ne’er-do-well] held by its neck of wool. He was held up by an arm laid bare of its fur, emerging from a shadow, showing the entire bronze complexion of muscles whose density could rival steel.
Of course, that damned upstart.
I resisted rubbing my eyes in frustration and looked some more.
The arm then unceremoniously dumped the chief belligerent clawing at it onto the sand outside what looked like the individual’s front door. A mobile unit, clearly broken in from the outside.
Having been hot-blooded enough to break in, the belligerent now convulsed on the ground, clutching its forehead with both paws. Its other limbs squirmed, making arcs in the sand.
It let out a scream of pain, its sound ringing from the desk terminal.
The twins didn’t flinch this time, but their discomfort grew in their tails regardless.
An equally bare and structured foot-paw stepped out of the shadow, and the camera finally panned to the rest of the [ne’er-do-wells], who then began to charge.
It was apparent some of them looked desperate for a fix and had no choice.
Others, though, seemed genuinely troubling even for me to deal with. Had anything happened to the escorts without outside help, there would have been no small inferno in its clash and aftermath.
It’s begrudgingly a good thing the cameras seemed to have redirected the ill-deserved wrath onto shoulders that could withstand it, as much as I hated to admit.
Then again, the escorts I assigned to that individual are tasked to protect the town from him, not vice versa. It significantly differs from a traditional escort — the ragtag bunch from Muller’s Bay never really got the chance to think about why Jeerim and Cinamy didn’t interfere with the home invasion.
As the video played of the clash and rout of said bunch yet again, I swiveled my chair to face the twins.
“It lines up with your testimony… uuh…” I said, unsure what to call the twin closest to me; their names are too similar. They seemed to have calmed down during the conversation, though.
“Kavi, sir,” the twin replied.
“And Tavi, you agree with his testimony?”
“A hundred percent, sir,” the twin further away affirmed.
“Nothing to add?” I asked.
“No, sir.”
“Alright,” I said, letting out a whistle of acknowledgment.
“You guys feel you can stick around with Cinamy and Jeerim for the remainder of the rotation?” I then asked.
“Y-yes, sir,” both of them muttered.
“Say it louder; I can’t hear you! I’m getting old, after all!” I said, trying to brighten the twins’ mood the best way I could.
“Yes, sir!” Both of them declared.
“Send in Nirva, my colleague and partner. I call for the dismissal of this meeting.” My tail swipe sent them walking out the door.
As the moment passed with the door closing, the video having stopped long before that, I began just to sit there, the whir of the terminal briefly occupying my thoughts before I started gazing inwards, back to a simpler time.
A simpler time cut short by my earlier naivety and hope for a better future.
A brief pause in the terminal's whir brought me to tap on the terminal’s cursor a few times to gaze upon the backlog of activity, going back [months] with each scroll.
There. I stopped. I hesitated to open the case and just leaned back in my chair.
Elrim and Chera, I sometimes wondered about you guys.
Should I have stayed in contact more often?
Should I have done something, anything, to prevent the present?
Before I could sink all the way into my thoughts, a skittering noise approaching the door dispelled my reminiscing, and the door handle jingled before opening.
Nirva… My chief partner in duty. I can’t forget how he assisted me in the last [2 years].
He sauntered in through the door opening and greeted me.
“Hey, Galeto. The paw treating you well?” Nirva said.
“Heh, I’ve had worse; today’s nothing to worry about,” I responded.
“Excellent. We need to talk shop,” Nirva said, but I held up my paw.
Feeling still somewhat peckish, I opened one of the desk drawers, revealing a local bag of {crink-leafs}. I grabbed a few for munching but saw Nirva looking at me.
“Want some? It’s local, not {Crinkos}.”
“Not right now,” Nirva said.
“Suit yourself.”
After chewing these down, I got to business.
It’s time to talk about the tree in the room.
“So, what of his condition?” I asked.
“He appears to be in stable condition and is largely cooperative,” Nirva chittered.
As usual, then. How troublesome.
Spitting into a [spittoon], I readjusted my seating.
“I assume he didn’t want to talk all that much during the trip here,” I stated.
“Yes. He just largely stayed quiet on the shuttle to here,” Nirva said, scratching his cheek.
“He did talk to the escorts, though?”
“Affirmative, he stated that he gave them his ID and testimony. Nothing more than standard talk for the incident,” Nirva then elaborated.
“Agh,” I said, frustratedly waving my tail to start again with another set of questions.
“What has he been doing until as of yesterday? I know you’ve been keeping tabs on the town already; just reaffirm it for me.”
‘“Well, I apologize for sounding like a recorder, but…” Nirva began to talk after a terse apology.
“He recently finished something most Venlil would consider socialization work, under escort supervision, [a week] ago alone. His latest task so far has been clearing the litter and refuse left on the beach, and there was [several years] worth of it on the coast, according to the dates found on the refuse in the bags he left outside his living unit. The coast became clear in approximately [two months], and like the other times he did “socialization” work, it was neither solicited nor asked for by anyone, nor did he accept any help. Atonement? Work ethic? Alibi?
I do not know his reasoning, Galeto. As for the last seven paws, nothing significant of note has happened,” Nirva spoke, becoming more thoughtful as he neared the end of his statement.
My tail swished in understanding, and I flicked my ears empathically.
“I see. One last thing to talk about,” I said.
“And what would that be?” Nirva said.
“Would you be okay with me retiring if the predator of the Stepping Stones ever gets properly identified?”
“Are you meaning-” Nirva began to say, but my tail pointed to the terminal, answering his question early.
“I just feel like either way, regardless of how it happens, I’ll have to retire by then,” I responded, not wanting to think about the outcome when it hasn’t happened yet.
“If it does conclude, it would have been an honor working with you,” Nirva said before a notification from his belt pad interrupted him, prompting him to check.
“I can say the very same,” I said back.
“The mayor of Muller’s Bay wants to give his thanks by-,” Nivra said, but I cut him off.
“I don’t need his thanks when neither my escort team nor I had anything to do with it!”
“Yes, I see. I should’ve remembered you’re not a fan of undeserved praise,” Nivra said, looking at me.
“I just don’t think I deserve the credit, but I don’t think the boy cares much for it either, so back to me,” I spoke unenthused.
“The package is already here,” Nivra then pointed out.
Brahk.
“Any eyewitnesses outside the escorts and the charged in Muller’s Bay? I’m about to go to the holding cell and see for myself,” I said.
“No witnesses for the conflict, only the immediate aftermath.”
“We’ll discuss other matters during our lunch break. You’re free to go. Have a nice claw,” I said with a confident tail sway.
Nivra nodded once.
“Of course. See you then,” Nivra said.
“See you then.”
Nivra then turned to leave, and the office door swung in and out, closing.
After what felt like a moment too long, the thoughts came back. I then leaned forward, clicking on the case file still on the screen, but I didn’t want to look.
Nostalgic thoughts of the past.
Distressing thoughts of the present.
Thoughts of the future that required time that I didn’t have right now.
I decided to close the case’s tab, but I still saw a glimpse of a doorknob with a key lodged in it.
[Minor error 21 (0x15), no memory loss. Refreshing…]
Feeling a headache coming on, I could only lay my head on the desk, shielding my eyes with the crease of my right elbow, leaving my vision with nothing but stray rays of sunlight still shining through the cracks of my arms.
As much as I didn’t want to see the sunlight, its rays were the only thing bringing any sort of peace to my mind as I rubbed my old scar on the temple behind my eye, adjusting both my arms to nurse the temporary pain. Despite the pain, I eventually lowered my paw, letting the sun’s rays into my eye again.
Just aim true. You always have.
“The things I do for balancing the wants of kin and kind…”
[Several [minutes] of transcription skipped.]
Making sure to look more presentable, I then left my office.
Walking past a few of my colleagues and subordinates down a hallway, I saw the lobby ahead with Lamka sitting behind her reception desk.
“Hey, Lamka,” I greeted her as my ears flicked out a wave to the Venlil receptionist.
She looked over and flicked back in response, but a thought in her tail brought her to speak.
“Galeto! Are you going over to talk to the kid?” Lamka said, clearly curious.
“Yes, is that a problem?” I said.
“The only problem is you keep thinking that talking to him would change anything,” Lamka said, her curiosity squashed into annoyance.
“I know. Both the kid and I are stubborn like that. He’s a lot like his father in that regard,” I said, not backing down, despite the mention of his father softening my expression of focus.
“Just keep in mind that it’ll be {a long night} before you manage to change his mind on anything,” Lamka said while pouting.
“The sun will come back, regardless of the length of the night, with time,” I retorted, and Lamka just flicked her tail and curled it, telling me to be on my way. Our ears gave courtesy as we split.
After passing the receptionist’s desk, I turned left from facing the exit and began to walk down a very short hallway. It had only a few doors, two of which were bathroom doors.
I was approaching the last door, which was the precinct's holding cell door. It was being occupied by someone all-too-familiar.
The holding cell wasn't meant for long-term confinement; it was the correctional facilities’ job to rehabilitate the astray members of society. Not that we had one on the archipelago, nor that this situation required an extended stay. I intended to do information processing and go from there, anyway.
The front wall and door of the holding cell were made of a particular type of glass inset since it was supposed to let more light in and reduce feelings of isolation, and the other side had a window to help in both of these endeavors.
The individual was visible but still lingered in the far corner of the room, sitting on a chained bench and facing away from me, but his bare bronze skin still had a sheen that reflected the light.
They probably used something to reduce chafing since the medication rendered him furless for the time being.
His tuftless tail was just neutrally placed, showing no emotion.
He looked even bigger now, his back frame sculpted by muscles most Venlil his age wouldn’t have developed without back-breaking labor. Something I knew he didn’t do much of before we met based on what I got from his sister.
But even among the working fit, something about his figure stood out.
Beyond his shoulders, which were already peerless in width without the muscles, I could not tell what else was strange about his figure from what I could see here.
Despite his unnatural shape, I knew I had to press on other matters.
“Kafim,” I called out.
No response, but his tail raised in calm acknowledgement.
“I assume you know why I’m here based on our previous experiences,” I said.
His tail became still again after a nod, and my impatience grew, but I mustered some composure not to react. I’ve learned that he isn’t deliberately being asocial from the several times we’ve been here, and even more so on internet-based conversations or lack thereof.
“First thing first, the broken window. The videos my escorts filmed were never inside your living unit, so tell me what happened before an item flew through the closed window,” I inquired.
He sat there for a moment, and his tail began to sway.
He finally spoke up with a strange, deep timbre before I could interject with a sentence in the prior silence.
“Someone broke into my house. He picked up a thing and threw it at my head while I was getting dressed in shorts. He missed,” he said, being terse.
I wrote his statement on a digital pad, converting my writing into a different, more legible typeface, while the pad also recorded the audio.
“What about the bleeding forehead on the guy you dumped onto the ground?” I then followed up.
“He wanted to headbutt me after throwing that thing, so I gave him what he wanted when he charged. He broke first.”
His tail seemed to droop in a strange mixture of sadness and disappointment, but he didn’t continue talking. Thinking of what to do next has always frustrated me, this situation being no exception.
I looked at my pad to check, and I saw that Jeerim applied a patch onto the chief belligerent’s forehead to fix a skull fracture that was on the verge of breaking off and getting pressed onto the brain.
That guy better get checked into a hospital.
Venlil skulls aren’t easy to crack. Even if home defense is placed heavily in the homeowner's favor, this is a rather grievous occurrence. If not for the drugs and camera footage…
He went and brahk’d himself over the shipment. The idiot sure isn’t using his head correctly, anyway.
Nonetheless, I wrote his statement on the pad.
“Did you know anything about the shipment of illicit substances the guys were harassing you for?”
“No.” His response was so curt that I couldn’t help but look at his tail for more information–anything!
There’s not a single iota of deception in his tail.
My mouth grits at the thought of this encounter as a freak accident, but I don’t see any issue with the kid himself or his conduct. Even if I wanted to continue this line of thought of the kid’s hypothetical misconduct, it’s not as if I have any evidence to pin it on him.
After all, the investigation was about the home invasion. The drugs were happenstance.
That said, having [boats] move contraband through the waters near my district is troubling, and I think I’ll have my paws full soon by the looks of it.
Note to self: Contact the district precinct overseeing Muller’s Bay for a lead later this paw.
I considered asking for his reasoning on why he did the cleanup at the beach. Still, I decided against it because he had a history of not answering those types of questions, and there’s nothing I can accost this kid about over a good deed, even if he did it alone with no chance of socializing.
It’s not like any of his former school peers, or anybody outside the escort for that matter, would want to socialize with him with how he looks. Stars know it took a year at minimum for Jeerim, and he wouldn’t have budged if Cinamy hadn’t warmed up first. It's a good thing they did because I need them not to freeze when the time comes to act when their life is on the line.
“I don’t know why you did a service for the community, and frankly, at this point, it’s no longer worth looking into,” I said, begrudgingly having to cut my conversation short due to a lack of relevant material to talk about.
I still have Nivra on for that if it ever becomes a point of contestation, anyway.
“Alright,” the individual said.
Nonetheless, the less-than-conversational turn this questioning took frustrated me endlessly, and I always had to say my piece. Still, I won’t let emotions overtake me, especially over something this banal.
“Listen, Kafim. I know I’m not your dad, and I know you miss your parents. Could you, at the very least, attempt to be conversational? I know I was callous to you when we first met, but at this point, I’ve long stopped caring so much about small talk and whether it’s needed or not. Just talk to me,” I made my statement and waited for his response.
His brief silence seemed as if it would linger. However, his tail spoke first, albeit with very faint signs of emotional turmoil no one would notice without extensive understanding of Venlil body language, something even I had to analyze relatively recently in my career, given... unfortunate context.
His tail then returned to neutrality as he opened his mouth to speak.
“I plead silence, as I am under detainment, and I have stated everything material to the current case,” he said. The stubborn and all-too-familiar choice of words ate away at my temper. I could hold my tongue no longer.
I have long since tired of the same [song-and-dance] and being kept at an arm’s distance!
My tail nearly lashed the ground, but I regained my composure.
Not yet and not now, just for Elrim and Chera’s sake.
“I’m sure you’re aware that your [birthday] is in [roughly a half-year], right? You will be a legal adult by then, whether you like it or not! No matter how strong you are, Teeta can’t protect you forever from the law. No lone venlil is a herd, not even you! And given what you did in the past, you don’t have much to stand on to even live like this!” I said, two steps away from doing something I regretted, my composure simmering.
“You should at least give thanks to the escorts and value the freedom you still have left because we don’t know what will come of tomorrow. Speaking of time, Teeta got worried enough to text me [yesterday], and you know that’s not something she would have done if you kept in contact with her! Have you even talked to her about Elrim’s birthday y-”
Suddenly, Kafim steadily stood up, unusually upright, and turned his head to look at me with one eye, making my body seize from the rising tension.
Right, I should have stilled my tongue.
Despite his steady demeanor, Kafim’s tail simmered with concealed agitation, and my tail began to mirror it against my wishes.
“When is it time to leave? My sister was supposed to be visiting me,” he asked.
“You know it won’t be for another claw! I-” I stopped myself again by slapping my cheekbones. I was this close to acting unprofessional, and my better judgment finally caught up. I will not be unruly! I will not be unruly…
A silence had to pass before I felt calm enough to ask.
“At least you still care about Teeta?”
Kafim turned his head back, looking into the square window on the other side of the cell, the tension seemingly drifting out the window he gazed into. His tail no longer hid his emotion, swinging in its slow wag.
“Yes.”
I released a breath I didn’t know I was holding and turned back where I came from. Internally, I knew arguing anymore would have led me nowhere.
Not a word or action of aggression, and I’m already leaving with my tail between my legs. What an ironic spat of speh I’ve sunken into.
I could only have grumbled and circled about for so long anyway before ultimately leaving for my office, and thoughts of that only made me resist putting my face in my paws.
On the way back to the lobby, an errant thought came to me in my rumination. I just let out a bitter chuckle as I was about to turn the corner back into the lobby space.
Kafim might have your wife’s eye color, but he for damn sure 100% got his reckless stubbornness from you, Elrim.
— {=CONTEXT TABLE=} Gold Nectar: It is a non-alcoholic malted soft drink made with malted Lurem, the brother grain to Ipsom. If Ipsom is wheat, then Lurem is like barley. Basically “beer” for pups. For a human reference, think Malta India, but light and golden like Bud Light. Stonebuilder is a mythological figure mostly renowned in the Teetsi Valley myth, which involves a place on the mainland. However, the Stepping Stones myth also significantly contributes to the Stonebuilder myth, often strangely told as if the storyteller witnessed it.
Crink-leafs: They are known for their crunchy and salty texture with a spiced kick as a byproduct of drying out in the sun after falling off the crink-leaf’s simple yet tall stem after accruing too much salt. Crink-leaf stems often harbored too many leaves for their simple stalk to hold all the time anyway. Think salted plantain chips with a spice-leaf taste like basil or bay leaves.
Crinkos: a brand of crink-leafs sold in chip bags. “A long night”: A more mild idiom version of “a cold day in hell.” An idiom of equal severity would be closer to “Skalga would turn its back on the sun before X happens.” ‘No lone venlil is a herd!”: Very similar to “no man is an island” in tone.
__

This chapter was made with help from YakiTapioca Go check out his series A Recipe for Disaster
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Memory transcript subject: Chris, human student Date: [standardized human time] November 7th, 2136
I finished getting ready. I looked amazing with this blue plaid jacket. I sprayed some nice smelling perfume and then headed to the door.
“Alright Lani I’ll see you in a bit!” I checked my pockets after getting my shoes on and I had everything. My wallet and ID along with my holopad.
Aioni told me to meet up in the park and then we would head to the transport tubes. I’ve only used those things once but they are amazing!
I walked past a couple buildings and soon got to the park where I sat down on a bench. I didn’t see Aioni so I texted her and asked her where she was at.
She said she was almost there. I turned on a video on my pad. It was a funny video of a Venlil sneezing loudly in a bar and everyone just staring at them.
As I laughed I heard the noise of hooves coming from my left. I looked over and it was Aioni. She looked gorgeous!
She was wearing a nice light blue sundress and on her head there was this nice blue bow behind her ears.
“You look…. Beautiful” I stared into Aioni’s eyes. When I spoke she blushed a bright blue. She walked up to me and put her hand on my shoulder.
“I’d say the same for you my predator~” I blushed a bright red and Aioni chuckled a bit. We walked through the park and down the road to the station. “So Chris have you made the reservations?”
“Yep everything is in order” the way Aioni trotted was so cute! I couldn’t wait!
We soon arrived at the station and waited for the tube to arrive. There was a bunch of people. I think some of them were scared of me or something.
As we were waiting I saw a flower stand and went over. There was a Paltan running it.
“Hell yes could I get one of those?” I pointed at one of flowers and the Paltan handed it as I paid him. I walked back to Aioni and handed her the flower.
“Thanks Chris… NOM!” Aioni chomped on the flower which surprised me. We’re those edible flowers? I looked back at the stand and when my translator kicked in apparently it was an edible flower shop.
I chuckled a bit scaring some of the Venlil in the station. Soon enough the tube arrived and the doors opened. A bunch of different species flooded out. Most of them were Venlil.
“After you” I held Aioni’s hand as we headed into the tube. We sat down on one of the benches. Aioni laid her head on my shoulder as we sat.
God these seats were comfortable. Maybe I should get one for my room? Where would I buy one though?
I looked around the tube and saw a Tillfish family. The kids were all skittering around. Kinda reminded of the beetles in my room.
I could feel the tube lurch and stop. The doors opened and we got up. As we exited the tube I looked at the sign. Broad Cliff. Aioni grabbed my hand and pulled me.
We walked out of the station. We looked at the crowds of people. There were a bunch of Venlil. We went through the crowd and towards this park area. There was a carnival going on.
“Well we have a bit of time before we have to go to the restaurant so I guess let’s have some fun!” We ran into the carnival. There were so many games to play.
We went to this one game I think it’s just a ring toss kind of game. There were five pegs that we need to land rings on.
“Can we play?” The Venlil running the game heard me and gave me and Aioni a couple rings. We then paid him and started.
I threw a ring and it actually landed on on of the pegs. I guess they don’t rig the games? We threw out rings and I managed to land all of mine while Aioni got a couple.
“Alright here’s your prize!” The Venlil gave us this huge plush of some kind of creature. Maybe it’s something on Venlil Prime?
“Chris we have to play that one!” Aioni grabbed my hand and pulled me over to this booth.
“What is this?” I looked at Aioni. She seemed so excited to play. She was wagging her ears rapidly in a circular motion.
“It’s one of the best games ever! You have to press the buttons when they light up and it gets faster as the game goes on!” I paid the person running the stand and we got to our stations. I cracked my fingers as the countdown commenced.
The game started easy, every time a button lit up I pressed it. Every couple of seconds the game would get faster. Aioni seemed like she could do this so easily.
After a couple minutes the game was going fast and people were gathering by to watch. The buttons were lighting up fast and our score was racking up.
“Come on Chris we got this!” The lights were going so fast. This was all reflexes at this point. People were cheering us on.
We beat the high score and we we’re getting even higher. It was going so fast I couldn’t keep up and I had to walk away. I watched as Aioni continued. Her hands moving faster than I could see.
A loud buzzer went off and Aioni was tired and wobbly. I grabbed her so she wouldn’t fall.
“Congratulations! You have a reached a new high score! Here is your prize” the Venlil handed us another plushie. This one was some character from some show. I think an animated one?
As we walked away Aioni looked up at me. Her ears wagged. She then leaned and gave me a kiss on the lips.
It was then we heard a loud whistle and we both turned to see a black Venlil walking towards us. She was big, I think she was bigger than me. She had earrings dangling from her ears.
“Room for one more?” I paused for a second on she just said. What the fuck?
“What?” Me and Aioni both stared at her in confusion. Her tail was swaying in the wind back and forth. “Who are you?”
“My apologies, I just couldn’t help but notice you two lovewools having a go at it over here.” I looked at bewildered. I had also noticed the guests were looking away “let’s us just say I demand a teeny aura of respect about me”
“So your a celebrity?” I could see how she was popular. The way she talked and acted all said it.
“Oh my~!” The dark Venlil leaned onto Aioni. We were both uncomfortable. “I think this one’s a keeper. He’s got a mouth of gold. And speaking of… I’ve gotta ask”
“How did it taste?” Me and Aioni both jumped back. What the fuck!?
“Look me and Chris are just on a date we are-“ Aioni was cut off as the tall dark Venlil walked over to me.
“A date, you say?” the Venlil repeated, pressing her face far too close to me. I had no idea who this person was. “So you two are an actual couple? And not some anarchists trying to cause as much chaos around them as possible?”
I tilted my head in confusion. Aioni did the same along with her ears.
“What are you talking about?”
“Look around,” the explained in a whisper, motioning her tail all around the carnival for us to observe. “In addition to myself, it seems as though you’ve got the entire festival’s attention.”
When I finally looked I saw the crowd at the carnival. People were staring at use from all over.
“Alright look miss me and Aioni have to get going. We have a reservation at this nice restaurant” the dark Venlil was taken aback but then sighed.
“Alright I’ll get out of your wool. Oh and, as a bit of an ears up, you might want to avoid the Grazer’s Delight. That is, unless you’re in the mood for bits of chopped up tree bark.” We both watched as the dark Venlil walked away. Her tail swaying and her earrings jangling.
That was…. odd to say the least. Me and Aioni both were confused as we watched her walk away.
“Aioni you ready to eat?” She looked up at me and nodded. We held each other’s hand as we walked towards the exit of the carnival. As we exited we saw some Exterminators booth where they were having people be able to sign up. When we walked past them they stared at us.
I was a bit unnerved at them. They seemed to just stare at me. They held their flamers close.
“Alright the restaurant should be that way” Aioni pointed to a direction and we walked. We saw different shops some with amazing things I’ve never seen before.
We soon arrived and the place looked amazing. There were beautiful flowers in-front underneath the glass windows. We headed inside.
It smelled amazing! I could smell the freshly cooked food. We headed to the Venlil at the front.
“Hello we have a reservation” the Venlil looked at his paper and nodded. The rest of the people in the bar were staring at us anxiously.
“This way please” the Venlil lead us over to a table and sat us down. Then a Sivkit came over to us with the menus. They seemed shaky and nervous.
“H-here y-you go sir” we were handed the menus and I looked it over. “W-what would y-you like to drink?” Aioni looked over the menu and then back at the waiter.
“I’ll have some Vranti” I looked at the menu and saw that Vranti was some kind of soda. The Sivkit waiter then turned to me nervously.
“I’ll just have a water” the Sivkit nodded and then walked away to grab our drinks. As we waited I looked at Aioni.
“So Chris I have to ask what do you think of this place?” I looked around at the decor and the lights.
“It’s beautiful just as you” when Aioni heard my compliment she blushed a bright blue. Her ears wagged rapidly.
“Here are your d-drinks” the Sivkit waiter placed the drinks on our table and some utensils. “Now as-are you two ready to order?” I looked at the menu and saw something that caught my eye.
“Ah I’ll have the Strayu with some of those… Dlario?” The Sivkit then turned to Aioni.
“I’ll just have some fried roots please” the Sivkit nodded and then grabbed the menus and walked off to the kitchen. “So Chris you did pretty well at the carnival” I looked at the prizes we had won.
“Well when your with me I can do anything” I gave a slight smile. Aioni chuckled a bit, it sounded like a rabbit.
Aioni took a sip of her drink… wait no a chug? Aioni was drinking her soda through a straw. I picked up my water and took drink. It was cool with the ice inside.
“Hey Aioni you wanna know something?” Aioni looked at me with her head and ears tilted. Her ears then began to wag. “ I learned a while back that what restaurants like to do is they fill you cup with ice and then the drink. They do this because it makes it look full when in reality you’re getting less drink” Aioni looked at me confused.
“Really? Why would they do it?” I took another sip of my drink.
“They do it if I recall to save money” I remember when I originally was told this. My grandpa told it when we were in an Applebees. It was then a question popped into my head. “Hey Aioni have you been to the Nevok homeworld?”
“Oh yes some of my family live there so every once in a while we go and visit” I always wondered what different planets were like. Maybe I could find out some how? “The place is full of snow. Whenever we visit we play with our cousins building snow forts”
“That’s amazing. You know in Minnesota whenever we got a lot of snow my family and I would go sledding” Aioni looked at me curiously. As I took another sip of water Aioni asked me question.
“What is sledding?” I looked at her surprised. Did they not have sledding on a snow planet?
“It’s where you find a big snowy hill and you take what we call a sled or something that can slide against the snow really well. You sit on it and you go down the hill while riding it” Aioni chuckled a bit.
“That sounds pretty fun. Maybe I could try it next time I’m over there? Or maybe you could show me?” Wait was Aioni asking if I could come with her to her home planet?
“Maybe but I’ll have to see about it?” Aioni’s ears wagged and we settled down. We then looked and saw the Sivkit waiter coming to us with our food.
“H-here you go” the waiter placed our food on the table. The Strayu looked amazing and so did the Dlario. Aioni took a bite of her fried roots. I grabbed a Dlario and bit it.
It tasted amazing. It was salty like a fry. I grabbed a bunch and started eating.
“Mwam tmis fmood is good” Aioni nodded and I grabbed the Strayu. It looked kinda like bread. I took a bite of it…. It was AMAZING! It tasted like warm sweet pretzel!
As I was eating the Strayu I had tears of joy in my eyes. This taste was unlike anything I’ve ever had in my life!
“I told you this place was good. I loved going here when I was a pup” I imagined Aioni with her family eating here. That sounded cute.
I was about to say something when I looked outside the window. There were a couple exterminators arguing with a human. The Sivkit exterminator seemed the most angry.
“The hells happen-“ before I could finish the exterminator lit her flames but before they could the human he grabbed it and pointed it upwards. “OH SHIT” everyone was panicking inside and outside the restaurant.
I quickly grabbed Aioni and left some credits at the table. We had to get out of here and quick. We ran out of the restaurant and through the crowd. To avoid the stampede we ran through an alleyway.
I could hear people screaming behind us. I think one of the exterminators were following us because I heard some behind us.
We had to get back to the station and quick!

Special Jeela chapter with permission
Special thanks to u/SpacePaladin15 for allowing fanfiction.
Special thanks to u/YakiTapioca for allowing me to add Jeela into the mix.
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Memory Transcription Subject: Jeela Magister of Law and Order within the Sweetwater District
Date [standardized human time]: July 16, 2136
These have been the most interesting paws in my life, back-to-back. Never in my wildest dreams would I predict that there could be an event that would conquer my attention so thoroughly. My favorite Harchen, Silus was busy combing through the data dumps that these resurrected enigmas had graced us with.
“Silus, darling, please ensure that when you look through their video archive, which I need a collection for my personal viewing immediately, look for any signs of tampering or censorship. If you find any, ensure the tampering and censorship is removed by sourcing the media from governor Tarva’s network. I know that you can do this little task for little old me?” I gently requested.
If looks could kill, I would be a very dead woman. Silus, an obscure criminal who specialized in breaking into security networks was an absolute delight to make use of. I had yet to fully exhaust all the secrets she kept tightly bound to her chest, namely the reason she was caught and what it was that she was caught with. Despite my considerable efforts, I couldn’t get access to those secrets except through her. That of itself was worthy of my personal involvement, what kind of secrets could hide from my gaze like that? Wrapping the enigma was a mystery as to why I would get more reports of Exterminators in the area whenever her location was “leaked” by me. The guild seemed to want her dead at any cost, and they only ever sent Kolshian members from off world to try to find her.
Whatever that spicy secret was, it guaranteed to be worth the wait to crack it open. Silus was but a humble IT worker working in my employ when I ran into her by shear luck. The presence of a startlingly high number of Exterminator inquests involving my computer networks once I hired her was my only clue that something interesting was fated to fall into my paw.
“Madam Magister, I cannot investigate the nonexistent “oddity” with our network, or that of the planetary government while sorting all of this!” she retorted, clenching her teeth. I found myself amused by this hollow bravado, “My dear Silus, you are my favorite technology expert, my closest confident, I have full faith that you can do both tasks. And, again, the oddity was quite real. For some odd reason both I and my contacts in the government and elsewhere had mysterious emails from our respective IT departments asking us for our login credentials. However, none of the IT staff sent the messages, and this only happened once we established a communication channel with Earth. The IT consulting firm mentioned in the email, doesn’t exist. None of that makes sense.”
“Madam, there are several consulting firms that remain unlisted for some reason or another, this isn’t to terribly rare, and asking for user information is standard practice,” Silus hissed with clear irritation. I chuckled in amusement, “How many of those “unlisted” companies send such emails to nearly every organization I have contact with? Furthermore, the odds of such a company escaping my gaze, while possible, is absurdly unlikely.” Silus huffed seemingly intent to stifle any further conversation.
As enjoyable as it would be to tease her some more, I did want her to focus on her task. No amount of work being put off was worth every delectable [second], I could put off such mundanities. “Madam, I think I found a movie you might be interested in. It wasn’t released to the public and is only available to the governor herself. Its synopsis apparently involves some predators who professionally use their predator deception as entertainment. I am sending you a file containing the movie call The Prestige, a fairly old film.”
My heart skips a beat at this symphony of information. The predators go that far in their deceptions? Truly, there couldn’t be a more fascinating species to grace the galaxy. At this point, my life’s work has permanently shifted to doing only the necessary tasks so that I can investigate these humans with as much time as I can spare. To think that I might find an equal, or even greater foe amongst them tantalizes me to no end. I cannot find a quiet place to watch my [forbidden fruit] fast enough, leaving Silus to continue her task of finding the phantom consultants.
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A/N – Here is my favorite fanfiction character. Not to throw shade on anyone else’s work, but she is hands down my favorite character. For those wondering what the delay was, it was making sure that Jeela was canon. I hope you enjoy, but please note that u/YakiTapioca reserves the right to require me to make changes if he spots any noncanon material. Oh, and there might be a crossover with TNoBaW.

the VoD so everyone can watch for themselves: https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1942097561
i definitely missed things and was not paying as much attention towards the end but here's a summary:
unread (briefly mayhem head coach in s2) was near-immediately fired for insulting xepher as a player and threatening to fire him and send him home to korea, which was just not a good way to deal with a player & a bit outside his authority
mag was mayhem's first choice for main tank for s4 but they didn't get him and so oge was their second choice. he has no regrets about signing oge, it was the right move with the knowledge he had at the time.
other players mayhem considered or tried to sign for s4: decay, edison, leejaegon (but knew it would never happen), mandu, closer, sanguinar (but never got to the point of talking to him, teru (was second in trials for checkmate's backup dps spot).
mayhem almost managed to get leejaegon for s3 as part of the package deal with gangnamjin, yaki and kuki, but misfits higher-ups insisted on trying to negotiate down the buyout which runner took offence to, which lead to him selling leejaegon off to dragons instead.
uprising were terrible in scrims during stage 3 in s1 despite going undefeated in matches, they were even losing scrims to mayhem and cancelling on them.
before s3, carpe was a free agent and mayhem tried to force a bidding war with fusion and offered him $400k+, thinking either they'd get carpe or it'd force fusion to spend ridiculous amounts on carpe
s3 was mayhem's biggest spending season and s6 was their smallest.
mayhem managed to get someone very easily from team cc because mayhem had given dragons a decent deal when trading fate to them before season 4.
offered shy $140k before s6 but he wanted to stay with spark for the chinese superteam. they weren't concerned about the possibility of integrating chinese players because swingchip speaks mandarin so they wouldn't need another translator, and gunba believes if the talent is there then they can make it work.
they made an offer to lengsa for s5 but he chose valiant.
5 toxic players: guardian, daco, striker, hagopeun, effect
xephehagopeun almost got in a fist fight after blaming each other for scrim mistakes, but it didn't get that far.
glads had internal issues this season and lastro went home to korea
rush was their other top choice apart from kuki for coach in s3, they wanted to try to sign the core of a top contenders team to turn the team around along with the rebrand, but obviously they ended up getting kuki & runaway players instead of rush & em players.
no idea what happened with london's inconsistency in s1 but before playoffs they were trying to book 4 scrim blocks a day and grinding extremely hard
tazmo in chat denied the 'seagull only got subbed in for fuel because taimou had to take a dump' story but then seagull confirmed it, clarifying that it was a warm-up scrim not an actual match
xepher did do really good in trials for s2 but they didn't play goats in trials and then he wasn't great at goats. albert thinks the xepher scrimgod rumours came from when he was on dynasty
at mayhem's nadir (after s2?) he thought about putting together a team of streamers (calvin/dafran/xqc/avast/sleepy all mentioned) as a publicity stunt and just letting them stream instead of practicing at all
r2der was toxic & not a good coach but he can't remember the details
the team owners' meeting hasn't happened yet, he doesn't know what blizzard's offer to the owners for the league continuing is going to be either
for mayhem's s2 midseason rebuild, albert wanted to sign most of mayhem academy (because they were really good at the time, better than the main team) & some of team envy (including crimzo), but bearhands (also assistant gm alongside albert) wanted to sign a bunch of wgs players and that won out, so they ended up trading all of mayhem academy to valiant. in the end the wgs players didn't arrive in the usa until goats was pretty much over.
curryshot (mayhem academy coach) was one of the best goats coaches and a proud scouting moment because he was previously known for throwing in top 500 ranked
he doesn't think it's necessary to have experience as a pro player to be a good head coach, but it can help especially to get respect & legitimacy from the players
checkmate played everything on ladder while he was benched in s4 which is why he ended up playing tank when oge was boomed
they couldn't really sign sideshow as a player as a bit because it would conflict with his visa for casting
they played majed in playoffs in s5 because majed had gotten more practice on kiriko while he was benched in the previous meta where rupal was playing bap
albert rulebooked uprising with the two-way player rule for fusions in s2 because he didn't want shanghai's first win to be mayhem
mayhem were the best team initially in playoffs scrims this season, when it was just mayhem/reign/outlaws, but then outlaws signed bernar and got really good at the zarya/genji comp, so mayhem signed whoru, but then as the meta developed further it became clear zarya got countered by doom & rein comps. reign did trial off-tanks before playoffs after outlaws signed bernar.
mayhem did offer american tornado as a package deal for s5 because they kept saying they wanted to stay together, but they ended up taking the better individual offers.
craziest contract he ever heard of was blase being signed to uprising at minimum salary for a 2+1 - thankfully he managed to get out of that.
reiner and someone were neck and neck in mayhem trials for s5 but then reiner got an offer from glads which made the decision for them.
gunba thought reign probably prepped too hard for mayhem in playoffs and underestimated spark/spitfire and so weren't properly prepared for them. reign & mayhem scrimmed a lot and reign put a lot of effort into figuring out how to try to beat mayhem's comps.
he doesn't understand why teams opted into the dive mirror with spark instead of just playing bastion
profit is the loudest player in the league
mayhem are not as good as spitfire at rein comps, so they didn't think they could beat uprising while playing rein due to uprising's strong orisa counter comp beating spitfire, so they think uprising were trying to bait them into playing rein with their jq comp. this is why uprising was their closest match in playoffs.
he thinks they were the best genji/zarya team after signing whoru and would have still won playoffs if that was the best comp.
toyou was the runner up to adam in s5 trials
rupal didn't make it past round 1 in their initial s5 trials
he pitched the idea of doing a deal with element mystic to make them a mayhem academy team a few times
maka was signed because they didn't know how well chorong would be able to cover illari if needed, and sauna was benched and london wanted him so they had room to make a new signing
2018 mayhem were the smelly team
whenever he approached huk to try to negotiate a trade from uprising, huk would just make a ridiculous buyout demand (200k+ even if they were a permabench player) to start off negotiations
craziest play he's ever seen was xepher dva bombing his own team (https://clips.twitch.tv/EncouragingIgnorantGarageKevinTurtle)
mayhem were profitable this year
probably would have gotten bliss if they didn't sign chorong because he thinks they could have outbid fuel
awesomeguy tried to organise a mutiny against albert in s2
fuel was interested in trading oge to mayhem for tviq at the end of s1 which would have been an extremely good deal for mayhem if it had gone through
albert helped convince shock to sign moth, choihyobin, and architect when he was an analyst for shock before he got a job with mayhem
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