Iv to po conversion of levothyroxine
HOI4BeyondEarth
2020.12.27 00:56 Dude577557 HOI4BeyondEarth
A total conversion mod for Hearts of Iron IV that explores how Earth would be shaped after a global event known as the Great Mistake!
2019.10.27 17:38 AEIOU_1886
A.E.I.O.U. 1886 is an alternate history, total conversion mod for Hearts of Iron IV, set in, well, 1886. Based on in-house lore, AEIOU aims to provide a new, exciting setting where the forces of monarchism and clericalism are still alive and powerful, where technology and science are limited, and where the destinies of nations are tied to that of their rulers. Yet AEIOU is also set on the end of that era and the beginning of a new, turmoilous and full of opportunities.
2018.03.12 17:03 Internetismean Red Flood
Welcome to the official subreddit for Red Flood. Red Flood is an alternative history mod for Hearts of Iron IV about a prolonged crisis of modernity destabilising the world. You can join our Discord for more info and teasers here: https://discord.gg/ePsMTjTR8d
2024.05.14 06:00 Choice_Evidence1983 [New Update]: My family forgot to invite me to my grandparents funeral, but they are convinced I was there.
I am NOT OOP. OOP is u/justathrowaway282641
Originally posted to TwoHotTakes + her own page
Previous BoRU #1, BoRU #2, BoRU #3, BoRU #4, BoRU #5, BoRU 6
Editor’s Note: removed all relevant comments from older posts to make space for new updates. To see all older relevant comments, check out the previous BoRUs above
NEW UPDATE MARKED WITH ----
[New Update]: My family forgot to invite me to my grandparents funeral, but they are convinced I was there.
Trigger Warnings: death of loved ones, emotional manipulation, gaslighting, harassment
RECAP
Original Post: November 14, 2023**
I’m 30s F and caused a major blowup in my family and now none of them are talking to me. For background, my hometown is tiny (500pop) and when I went 2 hrs away to “the city” (15,000pop) for college, I loved it. I ended up staying after graduation, got married, and am happy here for a decade. I visit my home town every few weeks or so, call/text my family near daily, and thought we were all good. My family’s pretty small. Just my brother, mom, step dad, dad, step mom, and an aunt and uncle (mom’s siblings, never married, no kids). My mother's grandparents moved to my home town when I was in high school and were just down the street from us. My family has always been pretty drama free (aside from my parent’s divorce when I was a kid) and we’ve been happy. The step-parents were blended in perfectly and we share holidays and celebrations together. We’re all super close and just the perfect little group.
Ever since I moved away, the topic of “when am I moving back?” is constant, and I’ve always laughed it off. My home town has nothing. You have to drive 30 minutes for milk and bread. 60-90 minute one-way commutes to work. And floods shut down the main road every Easter. I love the town, but I love here more. I have parks, stores, community events, a library! The “city” is great. My family grumbles that I need to move back, but I refuse. I've been trying to encourage them to come here, especially since it's not an hour drive to the nearest medical facility.
Now to the meat and potatoes: both my grandparents passed over COVID times. They were both old and their health had been failing for a while so it was only a matter of time. Thankfully they didn’t catch it, but it made visiting them impossible and we survived mostly through FaceTime. They both passed in their sleep months apart. Both were cremated and kept securely under the kitchen sink for safe keeping while the pandemic blew over. That was 2021.
Well, I just found out my family held a funeral for them and scattered the ashes in my uncle’s maple grove over the summer. No one said a word to me about it. I’ve visited numerous times before and after and not one word. I only found out because my great uncle from California posted on Facebook a few weeks ago that he is entering hospice and was so thankful his health stayed strong enough for him to see his little sister (my grandma) to her final resting place. I was confused and called my mom. She was all “Yeah, the funeral we had in July, remember?” Ya’ll, I visited them for the 4th of July. They did the funeral the 8th. Not a word about it to me. They had planned this for months. Long enough to arrange for my infirm great uncle to be brought over from the other side of the country. Apparently, they talked about it “all the time”.
Everyone is convinced I was at the funeral. They SWEAR I was there. I can prove I wasn’t because Google’s got my location history. My hubby is baffled because he was supposedly there, too, but he had to work every weekend in June and July. Time clock doesn’t lie. My family straight up forgot about me. I’m hurt. I’m sad. And they’re pissed at me “for lying”. They think I’m causing drama over nothing. Nothing I say can convince them I wasn’t there. My family is united in this. And they’ve all put me “on read” until I admit I’m wrong. They think I’ve gone nuts. Either there’s a doppelganger of me attending events, or my family doesn’t want to admit they screwed up. I’m not backing down.
Thanksgiving is coming up, and my family’s been vague posting on Facebook about “forgetful kids” and mental health. It’s so freaking weird and I don’t know if I’m in bizzaro world or what’s going on. My mom’s best friend reached out and said I should just admit I was wrong and apologize, that I’m causing my mom so much unnecessary stress. I asked her if she’s checked everyone’s home for CO2. She hung up on me. (We checked our CO2, and our testers are running just fine.) I have reached out to a few people in my home town to check in on my folks, and they all say they're fine. I even spoke with the local volunteer fire fighter group to see if they could check for gas leaks. Not sure if they were able to.
I don’t know what to do. I’ve shown them the proof I wasn’t there, but they know I’m tech savvy and just assume I’ve Photoshopped it. Hubby says we need a break, and we’re going to be staying home this holiday season.
Edit: I don't know the update rules, so I'll post updates to my profile should anyone want them.
Update #1: November 27, 2023
Not sure how to do updates on posts, so figured I'd post anything on my profile. Folks have private messaged me and this will be easier I think?
It's 11/27 and Thanksgiving just happened. Hubby and I stayed home. We got a small turkey and made our own little thanksgiving. It was nice. We ate around noon, then watched a movie, and later sat outside with a bottle of wine to watch the sun set behind the trees and neighbor houses.
We usually take the day before off, drive to my folks, stay the night, and help with the Thanksgiving Day cooking. So it wasn't until Wednesday night that my mom broke the silence. Mom called and asked when I was showing up, and I told her we were staying home this year, but for them to have a happy Thanksgiving, and to give the rest of the family my love. She was quiet for a long time after I said that, and I think she eventually mumbled an "okay", or something, and hung up. It wasn't an angry hang up. Just a hang up. On Thanksgiving day, I sent a group "Happy Thanksgiving!" gif to our family group chat. I received a few "happy Thanksgiving"'s back. No one's said anything else. There's been no posts on Facebook.
Update #2: December 12, 2023
So, I think I mentioned in one of my comments that my dad and I usually talk on the phone every Sunday morning. We're both early risers so we'd chat over our morning coffees and watch the sunrise. Him and I haven't really spoken since this all went down and it's been tough. I'm used to talking to him, you know?
Well, I was sitting outside in my usual spot, watching the sun rise and freezing my butt off, and he called me. I'm not entirely sure how to describe the emotions I felt. It was a mix of panic, hope, terror, happiness, and dread. I ended up answering because I just had to know what he wanted. It was an awkward conversation. He didn't address the current "drama", but instead tiptoed around the situation with all the grace of an cow on stilts. For instance, a simple "How are you doing?" Type question was answered with a "Not good." And the whole conversation would stall out for a bit because he knew why I wasn't doing well. So we ended up talking about the weather, the various winter birds we'd seen in our feeders, and the Christmas decorations around town. Things like that.
Eventually he asked if we were coming out for Christmas, and sounded sad when I told him we weren't. He asked if him and step mom could come visit us instead, and I told him it wasn't a good idea this year. That hubby and I were going to spend a quiet holiday together. I let him know he should be receiving some gifts at his PO Box any day now, so to please pick them up from the post office and put them under the family tree for everyone. He said he'd ship ours to us as well.
And that was pretty much it. No crazy drama to report. The only posts on Facebook have been the usual Christmas excitement ones, countdowns, photos of Santa, silly gift ideas, photos of company Christmas parties.
On a personal note: Hubby and I are doing alright. Our health is good, our spirits high, and we're as solid as ever. We each got Christmas bonus' at our jobs, so we're excited about that. They're not large, but we're happy to have them. We have also done advent calendars for the first time ever. I got him a Lego one, and he got me a hot chocolate one. We're going to do the calendars again next year. Maybe make a tradition out of it.
Everyone please have a safe and happy holidays.
Inheritance: December 16, 2023
I've received a lot - A LOT - of messages and private DMs urging me to check into inheritance and such. I'm really touched a lot of Internet strangers are worried about me and I wanted to ensure everyone that inheritance is most likely not an issue here. I'd almost be relieved if it was, because then it would at least make some sense. Money does weird things to people, you know?
No one in my family is wealthy by any means. After my grandparents' passed, their small estate was used to pay for their end of life expenses and remaining assets split up. Everyone directly related got an equal split (so excluded my dad and the step parents). I don't remember the exact amount I received, but it was around $5k if I recall. My brother gave me his share, too, so I could finish paying off my college debt while the interest freeze was active.
The great uncle from California has kids and grand kids, and great grandkids of his own, and also isn't wealthy. I think one of his kids makes good money doing something in finance, but I'm not entirely sure. I can't imagine he left us anything, as we hardly knew him. My mom, aunt, and uncle only met him a few times in their lives, and my brother and I even less. Grandma and him were close, but I don't think he liked my grandpa much.
Christmas: December 25, 2023
I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. I've received a lot of support through my posts and I'm really grateful. Writing these updates have had a therapeutic effect.
Yesterday was Sunday, but I didn't answer my dad when he called. I just really didn't feel up to a pointless chat, so let it go to voicemail. He tried to reach me a few times throughout the day, but I didn't answer.
Our bestie last minute invited us over to his house for Christmas day lunch (today), so husband and I were busy all Christmas Eve making cookies, peanut brittle, and homemade suckers/hard candies for his kids. Mom tried to reach out as well, but I also ignored her calls.
We had a BLAST at lunch! Our friend's kids are a lot of fun to be around. They got some techy presents from their grandparents (Quest vr headset and steam decks, lucky little rascals) Friend and his wife aren't good with tech, while hubby and I are, so we helped get them set up while our friend played a good host to his folks and inlaws. The grandparents didn't realize that a Steam deck required a Steam account, so we got the kids all their own accounts set up, added them to our steam friends lists, and gifted them some games. We also bought them a few VR games for their headset, and they were off to the races with Beat Saber in no time.
As for my folks: My brother texted and asked if we could talk sometime tomorrow. I think me ignoring mom and dad has caused some kind of upset. Which they deserve.
Brother’s call: December 26, 2023
Spoke with my brother over the phone this morning.
For starters, he apologized for everything. Him and I are good (for now). For a bit of background, my brother and I are only 2 years apart. There weren't a lot of kids around growing up, so the two of us were often stuck doing stuff together. So we have a lot of shared interests and passions. He's been pretty silent on this whole matter, but still "part of the group", if you know what I mean. I think the thought of losing him out of my life was probably the most painful, because he's always been there. He was my rock until I met my husband. He's definitely a Mama's boy, though, so anything mom wanted, he made sure she got. I'm happy to have him back.
Without further ado, here's the story from the horse's mouth:
Mom apparently had a cancer scare late last year (which no one told me about, go figure), and dad had a stint put in his heart back in January (which I did know about). This "sense of mortality" has apparently lit a fire under Mom's ass to get me back home. But since I wasn't reacting to her passive aggressive hinting, she and step mom decided to go full crazy. My great uncle's health was bad, and he'd been asking about funeral arrangements for his sister (my grandma) for a while, so the moms decided to plan it. And use the event as a giant middle finger to me. They kept all the planning pretty hush-hush between the two of them, so no one on our side of the family actually knew about the funeral until like 2 weeks before. The moms said they'd invited hubby and I. No one thought anything about it. No one thought to mention, confirm, or check with me.
The plan was to scatter the ashes, say a few words, and maybe head to town for lunch. It was a small affair. The mom's didn't even tell the family that our great uncle was coming for it. Like I said, it was a small thing. Barely a footnote. No one thought it was odd because we're pretty chill people.
4th of July happens. Hubby and I are out. No one thought to mention it, as we were all busy celebrating and having a great time. Any time the topic of "this weekend" would start, the conversation would be quickly shifted by one of the moms. We went back home.
8th of July happens. Great uncle rolls into town with a few of his kids, grandkids, and great grandkids, and it's a surprise to everyone (but the moms). Everyone drives to the maple grove and the moms have brought a ton of food and stuff. It's a full blown party. No one on my side noticed I wasn't there, because there were so many extra faces outside the usual group. They did the spreading of the ashes, they said their words, they ate, they had a great time. It wasn't until our great uncle left, and all his side left with him, that they realized I wasn't there. And hadn't been there.
And this is where the crazy went up a notch. My brother says the moms were happy no one noticed I wasn't there. And that this was proof to everyone that I needed to move back because I was so easily forgotten about. Because none of them thought to reach out, right? They basically did a ton of guilt tripping manipulation bullshit and it made everyone upset at me for not showing up. Somehow it was my fault for being excluded. So suddenly everyone was on their side with "sticking it to me".
But then a few months went by, and tempers cooled, and then I guess the horror of it set in. Followed by the shame, but by then they were "in too deep". How do you undo something like this? And since I hadn't brought it up, I guess they figured they would all just stay quiet about it and hope I never asked about a funeral.
That's when I discovered the situation from my great uncle's Facebook and called my mom, who panicked and went with the stupidest solution. Claiming I was there. Don't I remember?
I ended up talking with a few friends from high school, mentioning the situation, and word got back to those in town. So suddenly town gossip and little old church ladies got involved. Was I, or wasn't I at the funeral? Did my family forget to invite me to the funeral of the only grandparents I'd ever know? Or am I just causing a ruckus? My brother said they all just went with mom's answer. Of course they wouldn't forget me. Of course I was there. Of course they're good people. And it just snowballed.
The family expected me to eventually fold. I'm usually a nonconfrontational person, so me sticking to my guns was unexpected. And then I missed Thanksgiving. And now Christmas. With no sign of backing down. And I guess the realization that I could just stop being part of their lives is setting in and my parents are panicking. He's tried just getting them to apologize and explain, but stubbornness prevails. They want to rug sweep, but I'm not letting them.
My brother is upset with everything that's happened. He's realized just how crappy it all has been and he wants nothing to do with it anymore. But since he lives with my mom, he can't "get away from it".
He has asked if he can come stay with us for a little bit. I spoke with hubby, and he's in agreement with me that my brother can come crash in our spare bedroom for as long as he wants. Brother works remotely, so it's no trouble for him to pick up and go. I believe he's making the trip today or tomorrow. Not entirely sure, but I expect crap to hit the fan when he arrives.
On a side note, hubby's stoked that my brother and I made up. The two usually game together, but haven't due to "the situation". He's downstairs right now setting up his man cave in preparation for my brother's arrival. I'm happy to see him so excited.
Brother's Here: December 27, 2023
My brother rolled in late last night. He'd obviously been crying and when I opened the door, he just held me and sobbed. I'd never seen him like that before and soon both of us were just standing in the doorway crying into one another. He kept apologizing. Over and over again. Said he wasn't sure why he went with it. Just kept saying sorry. Hubby got him all set up in the spare bedroom while brother and I talked. My brother's a wreck. He's always been a big guy, but he's lost a lot of weight and his clothes just hang off him. If I didn't know better, I'd think he was on drugs. We talked for a little bit before bed and he re-explained everything for my husband. I'd told hubby the story, but it was just so weird that hearing it again helped.
This morning my brother was up at dawn making some coffee and getting his work day going. Hubby's off all week (lucky) so hubby made us working folk some pancakes and bacon. So far everything's peaceful. We've decided not to answer any calls from our family. They've been made aware that he arrived safely, and that we are going to spend the New Years together, and that we're not answering any calls until January 1st. They may text if they wish. I'm sure they're losing their minds. Serves them right.
Everyone, have a safe and happy new years! Don't drink and drive!
Happy 2024!: January 2, 2024
I hope everyone has a safe and enjoyable holidays, and may the new year be full of joy and happiness!
Not too much of an update. Things here have been quiet. My brother's settled in nicely and he's a great housemate. Our place isn't very big, but we have full basement and a nice outside patio/porch area so it doesn't feel crowded at all with the extra addition. He's a quiet and clean guy. No hassle at all. He got some fresh clothes from the Walmart, a haircut, and trimmed his beard, so he's more "presentable" now. He's a lady killer when he gets cleaned up. He's made nice with the (very nosy, but kind) retired couple next door and is adapting to "city living" nicely.
Folks back home have been mostly well behaved. There's been a few texts back and forth, as we're not answering calls. Mom mainly wants to know when brother's coming back, but he's keen on staying here for a while. Mom said I can't "keep him" and I told her he's a grown ass man and can do what he wants. Brother says he has her blocked after she ORDERED him to return home.
Brother has tentatively asked if he could stay long term, should he decide to, or at least longer than a usual visitor would stay. Which we're fine with. He has a good paying job and could afford an apartment, but he's never lived on his own and I would guess he has some anxiety about it. Should that be the case, he'll start paying us some rent and we'd probably adjust to give him the basement as his own space.
Had to change the locks: January 17, 2024
My brother is officially staying with us for the long haul. Hubby and him spent all Sunday organizing the basement and shifting things around so he now has his own area to be comfortable in. He's pretty handy and has also started fixing little things around our house. Our windows and doors have never closed and locked/unlocked smoother. He even fixed one of the closets we never use because we can never get the darn door open. Sadly, he also had to change the locks on our house and get us all new keys.
This is because while hubby and I were out this Saturday, the moms showed up. They'd been calling and texting us all week, but we weren't really answering them, so I guess the two decided to drive over and hash it out in person. They have emergency keys to my place, and just let themselves in. Brother told them to leave, they argued, and my nosy (but kind) neighbors called the police when they noticed the commotion. So, we get a call from neighbor's wife, return home to some cops in our yard, all the neighbors out "vacuuming their trees", and my nosy (but kind) neighbors standing on my porch with my brother behind them, doing their best Gandalf "You shall not pass" impression.
Had to talk with the cops, explain that we were having a family dispute and word vomited. I don't really remember what all I said, and was shaking a lot. Our local cops are really great. Fantastic guys and gals in blue, and took it all in stride. It's really cold here, so one had me join him in his cruiser with the heat on, and gave me a bottle of water to calm down while we talked. They asked if we wanted the moms trespassed but I wasn't sure if that counted as a criminal charge so just asked the cops if they could just make them leave, which the cops did with no fuss. I think the moms were shocked we were taking this so seriously. They didn't fight or scream at us. Just left quietly.
My dad promised me he'd make sure his wife left us alone. "Or else". He said he'd also have a stern talk with my mom. Him and I talked Sunday morning, and he seemed absolutely at the end of his rope. Husband jokingly told my dad he could move in, too. To which he declined.
Not sure where to go from here, but we're getting some ring cameras installed once they arrive. And everyone but my dad is blocked. Hopefully they all just leave us alone.
Nothing New To Report: February 2, 2024
Had a lot of DMs for updates, but don't have much anything to report on. The moms are behaving themselves. All's quiet on the western front. Felt weird ignoring or copy/pasting "no updates" to everyone, so here's what we've been doing, should anyone care.
Dad got a new bird/squirrel feeder from Amazon (looks like a little picnic table for a child's dolly but has a mesh top for the bird seed. I think it's supposed to be for chickens?) It's totes adorbs. To his horror, it also works as a Cooper hawk feeder, so now he's "fortifying his defenses" and putting up some trellises around it. He'll have to wait till warmer weather before planting anything to grow on them.
We had some ring cameras installed and put in a motion-activated camera that double functions as a light bulb. It goes in the light fixture outside the front door and is pretty cool. Video quality isn't all that great, but it's a nice addition I guess. It does overlook the bird feeders, so I've been watching it on my lunch breaks on the days I have to go into the office.
Hubby and brother are feuding. They started a coop farm in Stardew Valley a few days ago and they both want to romance Leah. My husband confided in me that he's also been romancing Sebastian as a backup. I'm not sure why he's keeping this a secret, but he's pretty smug about it.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
fractal_frog I hope your dad can outsmart the hawks!
My dad came out for a visit over the weekend. We had a good time and the weather was lovely for some grilling and beers. It was really nice to see him again and he seemed healthy and in good spirits.
Here's his report from back home: Step mom (dad's wife) has started to realize she's screwed up. I credit her change of mindset to the fact that my dad sat her down and laid it out for her: she leaves his kids alone, or she's getting divorce papers. That apparently shut her up right quick, because they had a prenup done when they married and I'm not sure the details of it, but it wouldn't end favorably for her. She hasn't worked in years, so I imagine she'd be eligible for alimony? But I'm not versed in any of that legal mumbojumbo. Dad didn't seem too worried about it, so I'm not gonna worry about it.
Step dad was pissed the police were involved in the last "mom visit" (despite no one getting arrested or anything) and was in a "the kids are out of control and need to be reigned back in" mindset. When my dad pointed out that "the kids" in question were all in their mid-30s, it took some of the steam out of stepdad's sails. According to my dad, even my mom looked a little surprised when he said that. So, part of me is wondering if a good chunk of this whole thing is my mom not truly realizing that her kids were grown, and no longer children she could make demands of. Both of the moms have left us alone. I expected my mom to continue to kick up a fuss, but I think the cops spooked her.
There was a wonderful suggestion by a comment or to get their pastor involved, which I passed along to my dad. Dad has since spoken to their pastor about everything. He's a young guy, relatively new to their church, and joked that his first month on the job he had to do 3 funerals in a row and his new "flock" were just dying to get away from him, so he's got a sense of humor which is nice. The new pastor agreed to sit down with everyone and help the family hash it all out in a true "Come to Jesus" type moment next month, so that maybe we could celebrate Easter together as our first holiday as a family. Dad said the pastor was aware our family was having some troubles, but unsure of exactly what was going on, and since he was new, the pastor didn't want to pry. He has also agreed to do a small service down at my uncle's maple grove later in the summer, as it usually floods and is a muddy mess all spring. According to my dad, my aunt and uncle are so over all the drama and just ready to move on, so I expect hugs and apologies from them when we next meet.
Stardew Valley Update: My brother was victorious in the grand fight for Leah. It was a hard battle. Well fought. When my husband exposed his plans to woo Sebastian all this time, it was quite the betrayal. Dramatics aside, their farm is really cute and I'm so happy they're enjoying the game!
Update 4/1 - Final one I think - April 1, 2024
Happy April Fools everyone! I hope you all check your caramel apples for stray onions before taking a bite! I also hope your Easter weekend was a delightful one.
It is with great joy that I tell you all about our most recent update! Possibly even a conclusion to this whole ordeal.
The entire family (aunt, uncle, moms, dads, brother, me, husband) and pastor met at my dad's house and we all sat down to hash the situation out. As expected from what my dad said, my aunt and uncle greeted us all with apologies and hugs, which was nice. My uncle usually helps host the Easter egg hunts with the church and he brought our Easter baskets to give to us in case us kids weren't sticking around the for the weekend. I'm not sure why but seeing it made me tear up and feel stupid, because it was just a basket of candy but it meant a lot to me for some reason.
The pastor led us in a prayer and talked about forgiveness and such. He then asked us all to talk one at a time about how we're feeling and what we want the end result of today to be. No one was allowed to interrupt so everyone got to talk. It was nice. The consensus for the group was that most everyone wanted things to go back to "normal". The only ones who had any variance off this was my mom and step dad. They both wanted all us kids to move back to the area.
The pastor asked them why they wanted us back, and neither could give a good reason other than "because family", and the pastor asked us if we were thriving where we were. And we said we were. He asked if we were happy there. Which we were. He then asked my mom and step dad if they wanted us to give up our happiness to make them happy.
And Mom broke down and said no. We all had a good cry. The pastor then asked about the funeral and lies that led up to it and followed it and how it made us all feel and what we wished we'd done differently if we had the chance. It was all very emotional, but in a good way, you know? Everyone apologized and admitted they f-ed up and did a really crappy thing.
We all talked for a long, long time and the pastor was a great mediator. Eventually we all reached some sort of resolution and I think we're good now. Emotions are still high and a little raw in areas, but we stayed for Easter weekend and had a nice time. We're going to keep moving forward slowly and try to repair the relationship, but I believe we're well and truly out of the woods.
As for my brother, he's still staying with us, and mom will stop trying to guilt trip him back home. He's thinking about renting a small apartment in our area but we're not pushing him to make a decision. He knows he's welcome to stay as long as he wants. I think he wants to try dating (he's had a few girlfriends but never anything serious) and is embarrassed to bring any girls around our place, lol. He's been going to a few random classes/bookclubs at the local library for something free to do and hitting it off with all the little old ladies who attend, and they keep trying to hook him up with girls his age who they know. He has been on a few lunches/coffee dates with a couple girls, but I think he's too embarrassed by the attention to give it a real try at "dating" any of them. He's happy, though, which is all I could ask for.
I'm not sure if there will be any more updates, as I think it's all be resolved about as much as it can be at the moment. I wanted to thank you all for your words of advice and giving me a place to vent and scream into the void. Please be kind to one another and to yourselves. Thank you.
Relevant Comments
emjkr: What a nice and hopeful update, I’m really glad you stuck to your guns when everyone threw sanity out the window!
But, could your mother explain how she thought this would work out in her favour?
Things as wonderful as the moment. Still doing baby steps with The Moms. We're texting and talking on the phones more, which is nice. Very civil.
Dad "accidentally" bought a bunch of hand crafted bird feeders at a craft fair. By accidentally, I mean: he had a little too much fun in the beer tent, went for a stroll while step mom wasn't looking, and stumbled upon a guy's booth and bought "one of each". He wouldn't tell me how MANY "one of each" was, but he cackled like a witch when I asked. Step mom said she's forcing him to give a few to me, so I'm expecting a delivery or a Dad-visit any day now.
My brother is officially "going steady" with a girl. We've met her a few times and she seems like a real sweetheart. She's our age and has a little boy (5-6 years old, I haven't asked) from a previous relationship (The dad's not in the picture from what I can gather). She's the granddaughter of one of his Book Club members, so the old ladies made good match makers in the end. The relationship is still very new and I'm routing for them.
No new Stardew Valley updates. Work has been a little crazy lately and I haven't been able to play much of anything, and brother has been distracted by his new lady friend. So, husband finally started Baldur's Gate 3, and fell for Gale's "magic trick" so now those two are a thing. I expect him to be sufficiently distracted from reality for the next few weeks.
submitted by Choice_Evidence1983 to BestofRedditorUpdates [link] [comments]
Originally posted to TwoHotTakes + her own page
Previous BoRU #1, BoRU #2, BoRU #3, BoRU #4, BoRU #5, BoRU 6
Editor’s Note: removed all relevant comments from older posts to make space for new updates. To see all older relevant comments, check out the previous BoRUs above
NEW UPDATE MARKED WITH ----
[New Update]: My family forgot to invite me to my grandparents funeral, but they are convinced I was there.
Trigger Warnings: death of loved ones, emotional manipulation, gaslighting, harassment
Original Post: November 14, 2023**
I’m 30s F and caused a major blowup in my family and now none of them are talking to me. For background, my hometown is tiny (500pop) and when I went 2 hrs away to “the city” (15,000pop) for college, I loved it. I ended up staying after graduation, got married, and am happy here for a decade. I visit my home town every few weeks or so, call/text my family near daily, and thought we were all good. My family’s pretty small. Just my brother, mom, step dad, dad, step mom, and an aunt and uncle (mom’s siblings, never married, no kids). My mother's grandparents moved to my home town when I was in high school and were just down the street from us. My family has always been pretty drama free (aside from my parent’s divorce when I was a kid) and we’ve been happy. The step-parents were blended in perfectly and we share holidays and celebrations together. We’re all super close and just the perfect little group.
Ever since I moved away, the topic of “when am I moving back?” is constant, and I’ve always laughed it off. My home town has nothing. You have to drive 30 minutes for milk and bread. 60-90 minute one-way commutes to work. And floods shut down the main road every Easter. I love the town, but I love here more. I have parks, stores, community events, a library! The “city” is great. My family grumbles that I need to move back, but I refuse. I've been trying to encourage them to come here, especially since it's not an hour drive to the nearest medical facility.
Now to the meat and potatoes: both my grandparents passed over COVID times. They were both old and their health had been failing for a while so it was only a matter of time. Thankfully they didn’t catch it, but it made visiting them impossible and we survived mostly through FaceTime. They both passed in their sleep months apart. Both were cremated and kept securely under the kitchen sink for safe keeping while the pandemic blew over. That was 2021.
Well, I just found out my family held a funeral for them and scattered the ashes in my uncle’s maple grove over the summer. No one said a word to me about it. I’ve visited numerous times before and after and not one word. I only found out because my great uncle from California posted on Facebook a few weeks ago that he is entering hospice and was so thankful his health stayed strong enough for him to see his little sister (my grandma) to her final resting place. I was confused and called my mom. She was all “Yeah, the funeral we had in July, remember?” Ya’ll, I visited them for the 4th of July. They did the funeral the 8th. Not a word about it to me. They had planned this for months. Long enough to arrange for my infirm great uncle to be brought over from the other side of the country. Apparently, they talked about it “all the time”.
Everyone is convinced I was at the funeral. They SWEAR I was there. I can prove I wasn’t because Google’s got my location history. My hubby is baffled because he was supposedly there, too, but he had to work every weekend in June and July. Time clock doesn’t lie. My family straight up forgot about me. I’m hurt. I’m sad. And they’re pissed at me “for lying”. They think I’m causing drama over nothing. Nothing I say can convince them I wasn’t there. My family is united in this. And they’ve all put me “on read” until I admit I’m wrong. They think I’ve gone nuts. Either there’s a doppelganger of me attending events, or my family doesn’t want to admit they screwed up. I’m not backing down.
Thanksgiving is coming up, and my family’s been vague posting on Facebook about “forgetful kids” and mental health. It’s so freaking weird and I don’t know if I’m in bizzaro world or what’s going on. My mom’s best friend reached out and said I should just admit I was wrong and apologize, that I’m causing my mom so much unnecessary stress. I asked her if she’s checked everyone’s home for CO2. She hung up on me. (We checked our CO2, and our testers are running just fine.) I have reached out to a few people in my home town to check in on my folks, and they all say they're fine. I even spoke with the local volunteer fire fighter group to see if they could check for gas leaks. Not sure if they were able to.
I don’t know what to do. I’ve shown them the proof I wasn’t there, but they know I’m tech savvy and just assume I’ve Photoshopped it. Hubby says we need a break, and we’re going to be staying home this holiday season.
Edit: I don't know the update rules, so I'll post updates to my profile should anyone want them.
Update #1: November 27, 2023
Not sure how to do updates on posts, so figured I'd post anything on my profile. Folks have private messaged me and this will be easier I think?
It's 11/27 and Thanksgiving just happened. Hubby and I stayed home. We got a small turkey and made our own little thanksgiving. It was nice. We ate around noon, then watched a movie, and later sat outside with a bottle of wine to watch the sun set behind the trees and neighbor houses.
We usually take the day before off, drive to my folks, stay the night, and help with the Thanksgiving Day cooking. So it wasn't until Wednesday night that my mom broke the silence. Mom called and asked when I was showing up, and I told her we were staying home this year, but for them to have a happy Thanksgiving, and to give the rest of the family my love. She was quiet for a long time after I said that, and I think she eventually mumbled an "okay", or something, and hung up. It wasn't an angry hang up. Just a hang up. On Thanksgiving day, I sent a group "Happy Thanksgiving!" gif to our family group chat. I received a few "happy Thanksgiving"'s back. No one's said anything else. There's been no posts on Facebook.
Update #2: December 12, 2023
So, I think I mentioned in one of my comments that my dad and I usually talk on the phone every Sunday morning. We're both early risers so we'd chat over our morning coffees and watch the sunrise. Him and I haven't really spoken since this all went down and it's been tough. I'm used to talking to him, you know?
Well, I was sitting outside in my usual spot, watching the sun rise and freezing my butt off, and he called me. I'm not entirely sure how to describe the emotions I felt. It was a mix of panic, hope, terror, happiness, and dread. I ended up answering because I just had to know what he wanted. It was an awkward conversation. He didn't address the current "drama", but instead tiptoed around the situation with all the grace of an cow on stilts. For instance, a simple "How are you doing?" Type question was answered with a "Not good." And the whole conversation would stall out for a bit because he knew why I wasn't doing well. So we ended up talking about the weather, the various winter birds we'd seen in our feeders, and the Christmas decorations around town. Things like that.
Eventually he asked if we were coming out for Christmas, and sounded sad when I told him we weren't. He asked if him and step mom could come visit us instead, and I told him it wasn't a good idea this year. That hubby and I were going to spend a quiet holiday together. I let him know he should be receiving some gifts at his PO Box any day now, so to please pick them up from the post office and put them under the family tree for everyone. He said he'd ship ours to us as well.
And that was pretty much it. No crazy drama to report. The only posts on Facebook have been the usual Christmas excitement ones, countdowns, photos of Santa, silly gift ideas, photos of company Christmas parties.
On a personal note: Hubby and I are doing alright. Our health is good, our spirits high, and we're as solid as ever. We each got Christmas bonus' at our jobs, so we're excited about that. They're not large, but we're happy to have them. We have also done advent calendars for the first time ever. I got him a Lego one, and he got me a hot chocolate one. We're going to do the calendars again next year. Maybe make a tradition out of it.
Everyone please have a safe and happy holidays.
Inheritance: December 16, 2023
I've received a lot - A LOT - of messages and private DMs urging me to check into inheritance and such. I'm really touched a lot of Internet strangers are worried about me and I wanted to ensure everyone that inheritance is most likely not an issue here. I'd almost be relieved if it was, because then it would at least make some sense. Money does weird things to people, you know?
No one in my family is wealthy by any means. After my grandparents' passed, their small estate was used to pay for their end of life expenses and remaining assets split up. Everyone directly related got an equal split (so excluded my dad and the step parents). I don't remember the exact amount I received, but it was around $5k if I recall. My brother gave me his share, too, so I could finish paying off my college debt while the interest freeze was active.
The great uncle from California has kids and grand kids, and great grandkids of his own, and also isn't wealthy. I think one of his kids makes good money doing something in finance, but I'm not entirely sure. I can't imagine he left us anything, as we hardly knew him. My mom, aunt, and uncle only met him a few times in their lives, and my brother and I even less. Grandma and him were close, but I don't think he liked my grandpa much.
Christmas: December 25, 2023
I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. I've received a lot of support through my posts and I'm really grateful. Writing these updates have had a therapeutic effect.
Yesterday was Sunday, but I didn't answer my dad when he called. I just really didn't feel up to a pointless chat, so let it go to voicemail. He tried to reach me a few times throughout the day, but I didn't answer.
Our bestie last minute invited us over to his house for Christmas day lunch (today), so husband and I were busy all Christmas Eve making cookies, peanut brittle, and homemade suckers/hard candies for his kids. Mom tried to reach out as well, but I also ignored her calls.
We had a BLAST at lunch! Our friend's kids are a lot of fun to be around. They got some techy presents from their grandparents (Quest vr headset and steam decks, lucky little rascals) Friend and his wife aren't good with tech, while hubby and I are, so we helped get them set up while our friend played a good host to his folks and inlaws. The grandparents didn't realize that a Steam deck required a Steam account, so we got the kids all their own accounts set up, added them to our steam friends lists, and gifted them some games. We also bought them a few VR games for their headset, and they were off to the races with Beat Saber in no time.
As for my folks: My brother texted and asked if we could talk sometime tomorrow. I think me ignoring mom and dad has caused some kind of upset. Which they deserve.
Brother’s call: December 26, 2023
Spoke with my brother over the phone this morning.
For starters, he apologized for everything. Him and I are good (for now). For a bit of background, my brother and I are only 2 years apart. There weren't a lot of kids around growing up, so the two of us were often stuck doing stuff together. So we have a lot of shared interests and passions. He's been pretty silent on this whole matter, but still "part of the group", if you know what I mean. I think the thought of losing him out of my life was probably the most painful, because he's always been there. He was my rock until I met my husband. He's definitely a Mama's boy, though, so anything mom wanted, he made sure she got. I'm happy to have him back.
Without further ado, here's the story from the horse's mouth:
Mom apparently had a cancer scare late last year (which no one told me about, go figure), and dad had a stint put in his heart back in January (which I did know about). This "sense of mortality" has apparently lit a fire under Mom's ass to get me back home. But since I wasn't reacting to her passive aggressive hinting, she and step mom decided to go full crazy. My great uncle's health was bad, and he'd been asking about funeral arrangements for his sister (my grandma) for a while, so the moms decided to plan it. And use the event as a giant middle finger to me. They kept all the planning pretty hush-hush between the two of them, so no one on our side of the family actually knew about the funeral until like 2 weeks before. The moms said they'd invited hubby and I. No one thought anything about it. No one thought to mention, confirm, or check with me.
The plan was to scatter the ashes, say a few words, and maybe head to town for lunch. It was a small affair. The mom's didn't even tell the family that our great uncle was coming for it. Like I said, it was a small thing. Barely a footnote. No one thought it was odd because we're pretty chill people.
4th of July happens. Hubby and I are out. No one thought to mention it, as we were all busy celebrating and having a great time. Any time the topic of "this weekend" would start, the conversation would be quickly shifted by one of the moms. We went back home.
8th of July happens. Great uncle rolls into town with a few of his kids, grandkids, and great grandkids, and it's a surprise to everyone (but the moms). Everyone drives to the maple grove and the moms have brought a ton of food and stuff. It's a full blown party. No one on my side noticed I wasn't there, because there were so many extra faces outside the usual group. They did the spreading of the ashes, they said their words, they ate, they had a great time. It wasn't until our great uncle left, and all his side left with him, that they realized I wasn't there. And hadn't been there.
And this is where the crazy went up a notch. My brother says the moms were happy no one noticed I wasn't there. And that this was proof to everyone that I needed to move back because I was so easily forgotten about. Because none of them thought to reach out, right? They basically did a ton of guilt tripping manipulation bullshit and it made everyone upset at me for not showing up. Somehow it was my fault for being excluded. So suddenly everyone was on their side with "sticking it to me".
But then a few months went by, and tempers cooled, and then I guess the horror of it set in. Followed by the shame, but by then they were "in too deep". How do you undo something like this? And since I hadn't brought it up, I guess they figured they would all just stay quiet about it and hope I never asked about a funeral.
That's when I discovered the situation from my great uncle's Facebook and called my mom, who panicked and went with the stupidest solution. Claiming I was there. Don't I remember?
I ended up talking with a few friends from high school, mentioning the situation, and word got back to those in town. So suddenly town gossip and little old church ladies got involved. Was I, or wasn't I at the funeral? Did my family forget to invite me to the funeral of the only grandparents I'd ever know? Or am I just causing a ruckus? My brother said they all just went with mom's answer. Of course they wouldn't forget me. Of course I was there. Of course they're good people. And it just snowballed.
The family expected me to eventually fold. I'm usually a nonconfrontational person, so me sticking to my guns was unexpected. And then I missed Thanksgiving. And now Christmas. With no sign of backing down. And I guess the realization that I could just stop being part of their lives is setting in and my parents are panicking. He's tried just getting them to apologize and explain, but stubbornness prevails. They want to rug sweep, but I'm not letting them.
My brother is upset with everything that's happened. He's realized just how crappy it all has been and he wants nothing to do with it anymore. But since he lives with my mom, he can't "get away from it".
He has asked if he can come stay with us for a little bit. I spoke with hubby, and he's in agreement with me that my brother can come crash in our spare bedroom for as long as he wants. Brother works remotely, so it's no trouble for him to pick up and go. I believe he's making the trip today or tomorrow. Not entirely sure, but I expect crap to hit the fan when he arrives.
On a side note, hubby's stoked that my brother and I made up. The two usually game together, but haven't due to "the situation". He's downstairs right now setting up his man cave in preparation for my brother's arrival. I'm happy to see him so excited.
Brother's Here: December 27, 2023
My brother rolled in late last night. He'd obviously been crying and when I opened the door, he just held me and sobbed. I'd never seen him like that before and soon both of us were just standing in the doorway crying into one another. He kept apologizing. Over and over again. Said he wasn't sure why he went with it. Just kept saying sorry. Hubby got him all set up in the spare bedroom while brother and I talked. My brother's a wreck. He's always been a big guy, but he's lost a lot of weight and his clothes just hang off him. If I didn't know better, I'd think he was on drugs. We talked for a little bit before bed and he re-explained everything for my husband. I'd told hubby the story, but it was just so weird that hearing it again helped.
This morning my brother was up at dawn making some coffee and getting his work day going. Hubby's off all week (lucky) so hubby made us working folk some pancakes and bacon. So far everything's peaceful. We've decided not to answer any calls from our family. They've been made aware that he arrived safely, and that we are going to spend the New Years together, and that we're not answering any calls until January 1st. They may text if they wish. I'm sure they're losing their minds. Serves them right.
Everyone, have a safe and happy new years! Don't drink and drive!
Happy 2024!: January 2, 2024
I hope everyone has a safe and enjoyable holidays, and may the new year be full of joy and happiness!
Not too much of an update. Things here have been quiet. My brother's settled in nicely and he's a great housemate. Our place isn't very big, but we have full basement and a nice outside patio/porch area so it doesn't feel crowded at all with the extra addition. He's a quiet and clean guy. No hassle at all. He got some fresh clothes from the Walmart, a haircut, and trimmed his beard, so he's more "presentable" now. He's a lady killer when he gets cleaned up. He's made nice with the (very nosy, but kind) retired couple next door and is adapting to "city living" nicely.
Folks back home have been mostly well behaved. There's been a few texts back and forth, as we're not answering calls. Mom mainly wants to know when brother's coming back, but he's keen on staying here for a while. Mom said I can't "keep him" and I told her he's a grown ass man and can do what he wants. Brother says he has her blocked after she ORDERED him to return home.
Brother has tentatively asked if he could stay long term, should he decide to, or at least longer than a usual visitor would stay. Which we're fine with. He has a good paying job and could afford an apartment, but he's never lived on his own and I would guess he has some anxiety about it. Should that be the case, he'll start paying us some rent and we'd probably adjust to give him the basement as his own space.
Had to change the locks: January 17, 2024
My brother is officially staying with us for the long haul. Hubby and him spent all Sunday organizing the basement and shifting things around so he now has his own area to be comfortable in. He's pretty handy and has also started fixing little things around our house. Our windows and doors have never closed and locked/unlocked smoother. He even fixed one of the closets we never use because we can never get the darn door open. Sadly, he also had to change the locks on our house and get us all new keys.
This is because while hubby and I were out this Saturday, the moms showed up. They'd been calling and texting us all week, but we weren't really answering them, so I guess the two decided to drive over and hash it out in person. They have emergency keys to my place, and just let themselves in. Brother told them to leave, they argued, and my nosy (but kind) neighbors called the police when they noticed the commotion. So, we get a call from neighbor's wife, return home to some cops in our yard, all the neighbors out "vacuuming their trees", and my nosy (but kind) neighbors standing on my porch with my brother behind them, doing their best Gandalf "You shall not pass" impression.
Had to talk with the cops, explain that we were having a family dispute and word vomited. I don't really remember what all I said, and was shaking a lot. Our local cops are really great. Fantastic guys and gals in blue, and took it all in stride. It's really cold here, so one had me join him in his cruiser with the heat on, and gave me a bottle of water to calm down while we talked. They asked if we wanted the moms trespassed but I wasn't sure if that counted as a criminal charge so just asked the cops if they could just make them leave, which the cops did with no fuss. I think the moms were shocked we were taking this so seriously. They didn't fight or scream at us. Just left quietly.
My dad promised me he'd make sure his wife left us alone. "Or else". He said he'd also have a stern talk with my mom. Him and I talked Sunday morning, and he seemed absolutely at the end of his rope. Husband jokingly told my dad he could move in, too. To which he declined.
Not sure where to go from here, but we're getting some ring cameras installed once they arrive. And everyone but my dad is blocked. Hopefully they all just leave us alone.
Nothing New To Report: February 2, 2024
Had a lot of DMs for updates, but don't have much anything to report on. The moms are behaving themselves. All's quiet on the western front. Felt weird ignoring or copy/pasting "no updates" to everyone, so here's what we've been doing, should anyone care.
Dad got a new bird/squirrel feeder from Amazon (looks like a little picnic table for a child's dolly but has a mesh top for the bird seed. I think it's supposed to be for chickens?) It's totes adorbs. To his horror, it also works as a Cooper hawk feeder, so now he's "fortifying his defenses" and putting up some trellises around it. He'll have to wait till warmer weather before planting anything to grow on them.
We had some ring cameras installed and put in a motion-activated camera that double functions as a light bulb. It goes in the light fixture outside the front door and is pretty cool. Video quality isn't all that great, but it's a nice addition I guess. It does overlook the bird feeders, so I've been watching it on my lunch breaks on the days I have to go into the office.
Hubby and brother are feuding. They started a coop farm in Stardew Valley a few days ago and they both want to romance Leah. My husband confided in me that he's also been romancing Sebastian as a backup. I'm not sure why he's keeping this a secret, but he's pretty smug about it.
RELEVANT COMMENTS
fractal_frog I hope your dad can outsmart the hawks!
OOP: He'll be able to, I just know it. He's used to dealing with the wildlife and having hawks about, but he just wasn't expecting one to snag a meal right from his new feeder.MissOP: keep the updates coming. the moms are so close to folding it's just a little bit more. LMAO also, the bro mance between your husband and brother is so cute. lol Honestly, I think your husband making sure he has a side piece of Sebastian is absolutely the play.
I told him it was "technically" still a bird feeder. Just....for bigger birds. Which he thought was funny. He said he might make a little "no hawks allowed" sign to put up next to it.
OOP: So far still no word from the moms, but I hope you're right. I would love an apology and for us to begin moving past this. But I NEED that apology. I feel selfish saying that, but I refuse to "be the bigger person" on this. I just won't.Update: February 27, 2024
As for my brother and husband, yeah, they're basically soul mates. The two hit it off immediately when they first met, and they've been thick as thieves for years.
My dad came out for a visit over the weekend. We had a good time and the weather was lovely for some grilling and beers. It was really nice to see him again and he seemed healthy and in good spirits.
Here's his report from back home: Step mom (dad's wife) has started to realize she's screwed up. I credit her change of mindset to the fact that my dad sat her down and laid it out for her: she leaves his kids alone, or she's getting divorce papers. That apparently shut her up right quick, because they had a prenup done when they married and I'm not sure the details of it, but it wouldn't end favorably for her. She hasn't worked in years, so I imagine she'd be eligible for alimony? But I'm not versed in any of that legal mumbojumbo. Dad didn't seem too worried about it, so I'm not gonna worry about it.
Step dad was pissed the police were involved in the last "mom visit" (despite no one getting arrested or anything) and was in a "the kids are out of control and need to be reigned back in" mindset. When my dad pointed out that "the kids" in question were all in their mid-30s, it took some of the steam out of stepdad's sails. According to my dad, even my mom looked a little surprised when he said that. So, part of me is wondering if a good chunk of this whole thing is my mom not truly realizing that her kids were grown, and no longer children she could make demands of. Both of the moms have left us alone. I expected my mom to continue to kick up a fuss, but I think the cops spooked her.
There was a wonderful suggestion by a comment or to get their pastor involved, which I passed along to my dad. Dad has since spoken to their pastor about everything. He's a young guy, relatively new to their church, and joked that his first month on the job he had to do 3 funerals in a row and his new "flock" were just dying to get away from him, so he's got a sense of humor which is nice. The new pastor agreed to sit down with everyone and help the family hash it all out in a true "Come to Jesus" type moment next month, so that maybe we could celebrate Easter together as our first holiday as a family. Dad said the pastor was aware our family was having some troubles, but unsure of exactly what was going on, and since he was new, the pastor didn't want to pry. He has also agreed to do a small service down at my uncle's maple grove later in the summer, as it usually floods and is a muddy mess all spring. According to my dad, my aunt and uncle are so over all the drama and just ready to move on, so I expect hugs and apologies from them when we next meet.
Stardew Valley Update: My brother was victorious in the grand fight for Leah. It was a hard battle. Well fought. When my husband exposed his plans to woo Sebastian all this time, it was quite the betrayal. Dramatics aside, their farm is really cute and I'm so happy they're enjoying the game!
Update 4/1 - Final one I think - April 1, 2024
Happy April Fools everyone! I hope you all check your caramel apples for stray onions before taking a bite! I also hope your Easter weekend was a delightful one.
It is with great joy that I tell you all about our most recent update! Possibly even a conclusion to this whole ordeal.
The entire family (aunt, uncle, moms, dads, brother, me, husband) and pastor met at my dad's house and we all sat down to hash the situation out. As expected from what my dad said, my aunt and uncle greeted us all with apologies and hugs, which was nice. My uncle usually helps host the Easter egg hunts with the church and he brought our Easter baskets to give to us in case us kids weren't sticking around the for the weekend. I'm not sure why but seeing it made me tear up and feel stupid, because it was just a basket of candy but it meant a lot to me for some reason.
The pastor led us in a prayer and talked about forgiveness and such. He then asked us all to talk one at a time about how we're feeling and what we want the end result of today to be. No one was allowed to interrupt so everyone got to talk. It was nice. The consensus for the group was that most everyone wanted things to go back to "normal". The only ones who had any variance off this was my mom and step dad. They both wanted all us kids to move back to the area.
The pastor asked them why they wanted us back, and neither could give a good reason other than "because family", and the pastor asked us if we were thriving where we were. And we said we were. He asked if we were happy there. Which we were. He then asked my mom and step dad if they wanted us to give up our happiness to make them happy.
And Mom broke down and said no. We all had a good cry. The pastor then asked about the funeral and lies that led up to it and followed it and how it made us all feel and what we wished we'd done differently if we had the chance. It was all very emotional, but in a good way, you know? Everyone apologized and admitted they f-ed up and did a really crappy thing.
We all talked for a long, long time and the pastor was a great mediator. Eventually we all reached some sort of resolution and I think we're good now. Emotions are still high and a little raw in areas, but we stayed for Easter weekend and had a nice time. We're going to keep moving forward slowly and try to repair the relationship, but I believe we're well and truly out of the woods.
As for my brother, he's still staying with us, and mom will stop trying to guilt trip him back home. He's thinking about renting a small apartment in our area but we're not pushing him to make a decision. He knows he's welcome to stay as long as he wants. I think he wants to try dating (he's had a few girlfriends but never anything serious) and is embarrassed to bring any girls around our place, lol. He's been going to a few random classes/bookclubs at the local library for something free to do and hitting it off with all the little old ladies who attend, and they keep trying to hook him up with girls his age who they know. He has been on a few lunches/coffee dates with a couple girls, but I think he's too embarrassed by the attention to give it a real try at "dating" any of them. He's happy, though, which is all I could ask for.
I'm not sure if there will be any more updates, as I think it's all be resolved about as much as it can be at the moment. I wanted to thank you all for your words of advice and giving me a place to vent and scream into the void. Please be kind to one another and to yourselves. Thank you.
Relevant Comments
emjkr: What a nice and hopeful update, I’m really glad you stuck to your guns when everyone threw sanity out the window!
But, could your mother explain how she thought this would work out in her favour?
OOP: I don't think mom thought too far ahead. I believe she assumed it would all just magically work out the way she wanted it to. She said she wasn't sure what she was expecting to happen (which I think was a lie, but I wasn't going to push it).mak_zaddy: This was a great update! But ummmmmm no stardew valley update? What gives? Has Sebastian been woo’ed? How’s Leah? What’s happening?
OOP: Sebastian has indeed been wooed (and whoohooed) There's kids and cows and chickens. The two are still having a wonderful time at the game. They're working on completing the community center but it's slow going as they aren't trying to speedrun and just doing things as they want. I believe they're thinking about going into the desert mines once they complete that bundle, but they're both super chicken shit about it!-my-cabbages: I don't really understand what you had to apologize for ... but I'm glad you're happy and the situation seems to be settling down
OOP: There wasn't much of an apology on my end, as everyone agreed I had done nothing wrong. Mine was more of a "I'm sorry you didn't feel as though I would listen." Type apology, which I don't really believe is a proper apology because apologies like that push the blame back on another. I mostly expressed my feelings and the shock of it all, and how betrayed I felt.
----NEW UPDATE----
Small, happy update: May 7, 2024 (1 month later)Things as wonderful as the moment. Still doing baby steps with The Moms. We're texting and talking on the phones more, which is nice. Very civil.
Dad "accidentally" bought a bunch of hand crafted bird feeders at a craft fair. By accidentally, I mean: he had a little too much fun in the beer tent, went for a stroll while step mom wasn't looking, and stumbled upon a guy's booth and bought "one of each". He wouldn't tell me how MANY "one of each" was, but he cackled like a witch when I asked. Step mom said she's forcing him to give a few to me, so I'm expecting a delivery or a Dad-visit any day now.
My brother is officially "going steady" with a girl. We've met her a few times and she seems like a real sweetheart. She's our age and has a little boy (5-6 years old, I haven't asked) from a previous relationship (The dad's not in the picture from what I can gather). She's the granddaughter of one of his Book Club members, so the old ladies made good match makers in the end. The relationship is still very new and I'm routing for them.
No new Stardew Valley updates. Work has been a little crazy lately and I haven't been able to play much of anything, and brother has been distracted by his new lady friend. So, husband finally started Baldur's Gate 3, and fell for Gale's "magic trick" so now those two are a thing. I expect him to be sufficiently distracted from reality for the next few weeks.
DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP
2024.05.14 05:26 Carpetfreak The Obscure Birds: A Theory Regarding Shakespeare's Macbeth
[I wrote this article about Macbeth for my college's newspaper, and I thought this subreddit might enjoy reading it!]
I have joked before that Shakespeare’s two favorite subjects–surpassing love, murder, madness, and crossdressing–are botany and birds. If you’ve been to New York City you might be aware of the “Shakespeare Garden” in Central Park, whose theoretical aim (though it proves nigh-impossible in practice) is to house specimens of all the plants which Shakespeare mentions in his plays. As it turns out, Bard quotes make for quite a diverse garden: there are roses which assuredly would smell as sweet by any other name; there are daffodils, that come before the swallow dares, and take the winds of March with beauty; there’s holly, heigh-ho; there’s rosemary, that’s for remembrance, there’s pansies, that’s for thoughts, there’s fennel for you, and columbines–no word on whether or not they could find any violets, though. I suppose there’s no objection to be made against those who complain that Shakespeare’s language is “flowery”; even as vicious a villain as Iago deigns to express his philosophy on life by way of botanical metaphor: “Our bodies are our gardens, to the which our wills are gardeners.” And, of course, the plot of A Midsummer Night’s Dream revolves around a magical flower which makes people fall in love.
I doubt anyone will object to my claiming of birds as Shakespeare’s other poetical fixation: I suspect that the majority of falconry knowledge which most non-falconers have today comes from reading footnotes in their copies of Shakespeare plays, explaining exactly what Richard II means by “How high a pitch his resolution soars,” or why Hamlet says “Hillo, ho, ho” to Marcellus. But while plants are so common in Shakespeare that I don’t know of one play which we might say is especially densely forested with references to them, there is one play that stands out as particularly full of birds in comparison with the rest of the Shakespearean canon. That play is Macbeth.
This is the sort of thing that one only notices after having read a play so many times that the actual events of the plot become akin to the meter of a poem–beats which must be hit, and which start to feel so natural that one hardly notices them–and one’s attention drifts away from the big, important speeches and toward the more utilitarian words and odd little moments that bridge them. I am not the first to point it out, but it is, all the same, a delightful quirk of the play, and could be a good way for Sophomores to throw their classmates for a loop in seminar [Note: Students at our college study Macbeth during their Sophomore year.]: why are there so many birds in Macbeth?
KING. Dismay’d not this/Our captains, Macbeth and Banquo? SERG. Yes,/As sparrows eagles… -Act I, Scene II
LADY. …The raven himself is hoarse/That croaks the fatal entrance of Duncan… -Act I, Scene V
BAN. This guest of summer,/The temple-haunting martlet, does approve/By his loved mansionry, that the heaven’s breath/Smells wooingly here: no jutty, frieze/Buttress, nor coign of vantage, but this bird/Hath made his pendent bed and procreant cradle… -Act I, Scene VI
LADY. Hark! Peace! It was the owl that shriek’d, the fatal bellman… -Act II, Scene II
LADY. I heard the owl scream and the crickets cry. -Act II, Scene II
PORTER. …come in, tailor; here you may roast your goose… -Act II, Scene III
PORTER. ‘Faith, sir, we were carousing till the second cock… -Act II, Scene III
LENNOX. New hatch’d to the woeful time: the obscure bird/Clamour’d the livelong night… -Act II, Scene III
OLD MAN. …On Tuesday last,/A falcon, towering in her pride of place,/Was by a mousing owl hawk’d at and kill’d. -Act II, Scene IV
MACBETH. …Light thickens; and the crow/Makes wing to the rooky wood… -Act III, Scene II
MACBETH. If charnel-houses and our graves must send/Those that we bury back, our monuments/Shall be the maws of kites. -Act III, Scene IV
MACBETH. Augurs and understood relations have/By magot pies and choughs and rooks brought forth/The secret’st man of blood. -Act III, Scene IV
LADY MACDUFF. …the poor wren,/the most diminutive of birds, will fight,/Her young ones in her nest, against the owl. -Act IV, Scene II
LADY MACDUFF. How will you live? SON. As birds do, mother. LADY MACDUFF. What, with worms and flies? SON. With what I get, I mean; and so do they. LADY MACDUFF. Poor bird! Thou’ldst never fear the net nor lime,/The pitfall nor the gin? SON. Why should I, mother? Poor birds they are not set for. -Act IV, Scene II
FIRST MURDERER. What, you egg! -Act IV, Scene II
MACDUFF. …there cannot be/That vulture in you… -Act IV, Scene III
MACDUFF. …O hell-kite! All?/What, all my pretty chickens and their dam/At one fell swoop? -Act IV, Scene III
MACBETH. The devil damn thee black, thou cream-faced loon!/Where got’st thou that goose look? SERVANT. There is ten thousand– MACBETH. Geese, villain? -Act V, Scene III
Above I have listed every ornithological reference that I’ve found in the Scottish Play; as we peruse them, we certainly cannot conclude that every individual reference is of the same kind, or carries the same import. I will not pretend, for example, that, just because geese and ravens are both birds, the Porter’s invitation for the imagined English tailor to cook his goose in Hell merits as much attention as Lady Macbeth’s ominous declaration that “the raven himself is hoarse”. Nor do I think that any individual reference particularly demands explication; by itself, any one of these bird-invocations seems perfectly natural. Shakespeare’s talent is such that he can repeat a motif in such a way that on the macro level it is obvious yet on the micro level it hardly feels present. But that macro level is what interests me here: what impression is created, on the whole, by the presence of so many birds in this play? I have a theory, which, though it may seem far-fetched, I think merits at least some consideration, and which, at the very least, I have not seen stated elsewhere, and so may make a novel contribution to the conversation.
Macbeth is both Shakespeare’s most supernatural tragedy and his most Sophoclean; these two superlatives are inextricably related. The appellative Weird given to the opening scene’s three Sisters–derived from the Old English wyrd, meaning destiny, and famously given its more familiar connotation by Shakespeare himself in this very play–is, among the Bard’s works, unique to Macbeth; and just as that word appears nowhere else in Shakespeare, so is the concept it represents absent in all tragedies but this one. Though Hamlet may cry out against outrageous fortune, and though Othello may rhetoricize about how no man can control his fate, it is only in Macbeth that we truly feel that the events we see play out before us are fated, predestined, inevitable. [See Note 1.] The ghost in Hamlet commands his son to revenge his foul and most unnatural murder, but does not tell him it is certain that he will succeed; indeed, would not the drama be sapped of its intrigue if that level of certainty were present? Meanwhile, the supernatural interlopers in Macbeth offer the Scottish thane not a mission, but a prophecy: All hail, Macbeth! that shalt be king hereafter! From its mystical opening word–When, not If–the Scottish play makes us aware of the certainty of all that is to befall our tragic antihero. Macbeth is thus a different sort of tragedy than Shakespeare’s others, and it works by an inverted mechanism. While the tragedy of, for example, Desdemona’s death is that it may have been prevented, the tragedy of Macbeth’s destruction is that it represents the fulfilment of fate; and this is the very same mechanism by which Oedipus Rex operates, complete with its own “Weird” character in the form of the seer Tiresias. Though Calvin managed to accept that some men are destined for greatness and others for ruin, this idea is, to Shakespeare and Sophocles, nothing short of agonizing–the stuff of tragedy.
Now: what does all of this have to do with birds? Consider these words from Antigone, spoken by Tiresias to Creon:
You shall learn, when you hear the indications of my art! As I took my place on my ancient seat for observing birds, where I can mark every bird of omen I heard a strange sound among them, since they were screeching with dire, incoherent frenzy and I knew that they were tearing each other with bloody claws, for there was a whirring of wings that made it clear… (Lloyd-Jones translation)
Consider next these words from Oedipus Tyrannus, spoken defensively by Oedipus to Tiresias:
Why, come, tell me, how can you be a true prophet? Why when the versifying hound was here did not you speak some word that could release the citizens? Indeed, her riddle was not one for the first comer to explain! It required prophetic skill, and you were exposed as having no knowledge from the birds or from the gods. No, it was I that came, Oedipus who knew nothing, and put a stop to her; I hit the mark by native wit, not by what I learned from birds. (Lloyd-Jones translation)
The practice of divining the future from birds–be it from their behaviors, their cries, or their innards–was, to Sophocles and his contemporaries, not superstitious hokum, but a practical science at which one could be skilled or unskilled, and it bodes ill for Oedipus that he is so quick to disregard it in favor of his own native wit. [See Note 2] By Shakespeare’s day, the practice had long been relegated to the realm of outdated hocus-pocus, but the Bard still saw some truth in it; in Macbeth, there is a recurring sense that, when the world is sick with some great wrong, its first symptoms manifest in the behavior of birds. When the “fatal bellman” the owl shrieks in the night, Lady Macbeth takes it as a sign that her husband is about his bloody business. The day after the murder of Duncan, as Ross converses with an Old Man about the strange things they’ve seen the previous night, “unnatural/Even as the deed that’s done”, the killing of a falcon by a mousing-owl–an omen straight out of Sophocles–is mentioned before the madness and cannibalism of Duncan’s horses, even though the latter would surely be more immediately noticeable and ghastly than the former.
These are the most obvious examples of birds as ill omens in Macbeth; yet even the more innocuous invocations of birds throughout the rest of the play continually turn our thoughts back to the ancient Greek understanding of fate and prophecy, and thereby remind us that, however savagely he may fight at Dunsinane, Macbeth’s fate is as fixed as that of Oedipus. The birds have already foretold all.
Note 1: The closest thing there is to this kind of fatalness in another Shakespearean tragedy is the several superstitious occurrences in Julius Caesar–both the soothsayer’s message of “Beware the ides of March” and the bestial portents such as the lack of a heart in an offering and the whelping of a lioness in the streets. Still, I will insist that these omens do not convey a sense of fatedness to the audience as strongly as the Weird Sisters in Macbeth by virtue of their being told to Caesar himself, not to Brutus, the play’s true protagonist, and by the fact that Shakespeare elsewhere uses dialogue to throw some doubt upon the idea of predestination: "Men at some times are masters of their fates:/The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars,/But in ourselves, that we are underlings." -I.ii
Note 2: The Liddell-Scott Greek Lexicon identifies at least two separate verbs referring to bird-based divination, both of which are present in the quoted passages: Tiresias uses ορνϊθοσκοπέομαι, observe birds, interpret their flight and cries, while Oedipus uses οιωνίζομαι, take omens from the flight and cries of birds. The latter term comes from οιωνος, a large bird, bird of prey, such as a vulture or eagle, and so distinguished from a common bird, while the former comes from ορνις, which more generally refers to a bird, including birds of prey and domestic fowls. Birds of both kinds are present in Macbeth; there are οιωναι, such as the “falcon, towering in her pride of place”, as well as ορνες, like the Porter’s goose and cock. I therefore see little value in interrogating the kinds of birds invoked by Shakespeare, the specific cultural associations and significance of the owl, the raven, or the wren; rather, if we reduce them down to their barest existence as birds, animals of the class Aves, and consider them in an ancient Greek light, then things become a bit clearer.
submitted by Carpetfreak to shakespeare [link] [comments]
I have joked before that Shakespeare’s two favorite subjects–surpassing love, murder, madness, and crossdressing–are botany and birds. If you’ve been to New York City you might be aware of the “Shakespeare Garden” in Central Park, whose theoretical aim (though it proves nigh-impossible in practice) is to house specimens of all the plants which Shakespeare mentions in his plays. As it turns out, Bard quotes make for quite a diverse garden: there are roses which assuredly would smell as sweet by any other name; there are daffodils, that come before the swallow dares, and take the winds of March with beauty; there’s holly, heigh-ho; there’s rosemary, that’s for remembrance, there’s pansies, that’s for thoughts, there’s fennel for you, and columbines–no word on whether or not they could find any violets, though. I suppose there’s no objection to be made against those who complain that Shakespeare’s language is “flowery”; even as vicious a villain as Iago deigns to express his philosophy on life by way of botanical metaphor: “Our bodies are our gardens, to the which our wills are gardeners.” And, of course, the plot of A Midsummer Night’s Dream revolves around a magical flower which makes people fall in love.
I doubt anyone will object to my claiming of birds as Shakespeare’s other poetical fixation: I suspect that the majority of falconry knowledge which most non-falconers have today comes from reading footnotes in their copies of Shakespeare plays, explaining exactly what Richard II means by “How high a pitch his resolution soars,” or why Hamlet says “Hillo, ho, ho” to Marcellus. But while plants are so common in Shakespeare that I don’t know of one play which we might say is especially densely forested with references to them, there is one play that stands out as particularly full of birds in comparison with the rest of the Shakespearean canon. That play is Macbeth.
This is the sort of thing that one only notices after having read a play so many times that the actual events of the plot become akin to the meter of a poem–beats which must be hit, and which start to feel so natural that one hardly notices them–and one’s attention drifts away from the big, important speeches and toward the more utilitarian words and odd little moments that bridge them. I am not the first to point it out, but it is, all the same, a delightful quirk of the play, and could be a good way for Sophomores to throw their classmates for a loop in seminar [Note: Students at our college study Macbeth during their Sophomore year.]: why are there so many birds in Macbeth?
KING. Dismay’d not this/Our captains, Macbeth and Banquo? SERG. Yes,/As sparrows eagles… -Act I, Scene II
LADY. …The raven himself is hoarse/That croaks the fatal entrance of Duncan… -Act I, Scene V
BAN. This guest of summer,/The temple-haunting martlet, does approve/By his loved mansionry, that the heaven’s breath/Smells wooingly here: no jutty, frieze/Buttress, nor coign of vantage, but this bird/Hath made his pendent bed and procreant cradle… -Act I, Scene VI
LADY. Hark! Peace! It was the owl that shriek’d, the fatal bellman… -Act II, Scene II
LADY. I heard the owl scream and the crickets cry. -Act II, Scene II
PORTER. …come in, tailor; here you may roast your goose… -Act II, Scene III
PORTER. ‘Faith, sir, we were carousing till the second cock… -Act II, Scene III
LENNOX. New hatch’d to the woeful time: the obscure bird/Clamour’d the livelong night… -Act II, Scene III
OLD MAN. …On Tuesday last,/A falcon, towering in her pride of place,/Was by a mousing owl hawk’d at and kill’d. -Act II, Scene IV
MACBETH. …Light thickens; and the crow/Makes wing to the rooky wood… -Act III, Scene II
MACBETH. If charnel-houses and our graves must send/Those that we bury back, our monuments/Shall be the maws of kites. -Act III, Scene IV
MACBETH. Augurs and understood relations have/By magot pies and choughs and rooks brought forth/The secret’st man of blood. -Act III, Scene IV
LADY MACDUFF. …the poor wren,/the most diminutive of birds, will fight,/Her young ones in her nest, against the owl. -Act IV, Scene II
LADY MACDUFF. How will you live? SON. As birds do, mother. LADY MACDUFF. What, with worms and flies? SON. With what I get, I mean; and so do they. LADY MACDUFF. Poor bird! Thou’ldst never fear the net nor lime,/The pitfall nor the gin? SON. Why should I, mother? Poor birds they are not set for. -Act IV, Scene II
FIRST MURDERER. What, you egg! -Act IV, Scene II
MACDUFF. …there cannot be/That vulture in you… -Act IV, Scene III
MACDUFF. …O hell-kite! All?/What, all my pretty chickens and their dam/At one fell swoop? -Act IV, Scene III
MACBETH. The devil damn thee black, thou cream-faced loon!/Where got’st thou that goose look? SERVANT. There is ten thousand– MACBETH. Geese, villain? -Act V, Scene III
Above I have listed every ornithological reference that I’ve found in the Scottish Play; as we peruse them, we certainly cannot conclude that every individual reference is of the same kind, or carries the same import. I will not pretend, for example, that, just because geese and ravens are both birds, the Porter’s invitation for the imagined English tailor to cook his goose in Hell merits as much attention as Lady Macbeth’s ominous declaration that “the raven himself is hoarse”. Nor do I think that any individual reference particularly demands explication; by itself, any one of these bird-invocations seems perfectly natural. Shakespeare’s talent is such that he can repeat a motif in such a way that on the macro level it is obvious yet on the micro level it hardly feels present. But that macro level is what interests me here: what impression is created, on the whole, by the presence of so many birds in this play? I have a theory, which, though it may seem far-fetched, I think merits at least some consideration, and which, at the very least, I have not seen stated elsewhere, and so may make a novel contribution to the conversation.
Macbeth is both Shakespeare’s most supernatural tragedy and his most Sophoclean; these two superlatives are inextricably related. The appellative Weird given to the opening scene’s three Sisters–derived from the Old English wyrd, meaning destiny, and famously given its more familiar connotation by Shakespeare himself in this very play–is, among the Bard’s works, unique to Macbeth; and just as that word appears nowhere else in Shakespeare, so is the concept it represents absent in all tragedies but this one. Though Hamlet may cry out against outrageous fortune, and though Othello may rhetoricize about how no man can control his fate, it is only in Macbeth that we truly feel that the events we see play out before us are fated, predestined, inevitable. [See Note 1.] The ghost in Hamlet commands his son to revenge his foul and most unnatural murder, but does not tell him it is certain that he will succeed; indeed, would not the drama be sapped of its intrigue if that level of certainty were present? Meanwhile, the supernatural interlopers in Macbeth offer the Scottish thane not a mission, but a prophecy: All hail, Macbeth! that shalt be king hereafter! From its mystical opening word–When, not If–the Scottish play makes us aware of the certainty of all that is to befall our tragic antihero. Macbeth is thus a different sort of tragedy than Shakespeare’s others, and it works by an inverted mechanism. While the tragedy of, for example, Desdemona’s death is that it may have been prevented, the tragedy of Macbeth’s destruction is that it represents the fulfilment of fate; and this is the very same mechanism by which Oedipus Rex operates, complete with its own “Weird” character in the form of the seer Tiresias. Though Calvin managed to accept that some men are destined for greatness and others for ruin, this idea is, to Shakespeare and Sophocles, nothing short of agonizing–the stuff of tragedy.
Now: what does all of this have to do with birds? Consider these words from Antigone, spoken by Tiresias to Creon:
You shall learn, when you hear the indications of my art! As I took my place on my ancient seat for observing birds, where I can mark every bird of omen I heard a strange sound among them, since they were screeching with dire, incoherent frenzy and I knew that they were tearing each other with bloody claws, for there was a whirring of wings that made it clear… (Lloyd-Jones translation)
Consider next these words from Oedipus Tyrannus, spoken defensively by Oedipus to Tiresias:
Why, come, tell me, how can you be a true prophet? Why when the versifying hound was here did not you speak some word that could release the citizens? Indeed, her riddle was not one for the first comer to explain! It required prophetic skill, and you were exposed as having no knowledge from the birds or from the gods. No, it was I that came, Oedipus who knew nothing, and put a stop to her; I hit the mark by native wit, not by what I learned from birds. (Lloyd-Jones translation)
The practice of divining the future from birds–be it from their behaviors, their cries, or their innards–was, to Sophocles and his contemporaries, not superstitious hokum, but a practical science at which one could be skilled or unskilled, and it bodes ill for Oedipus that he is so quick to disregard it in favor of his own native wit. [See Note 2] By Shakespeare’s day, the practice had long been relegated to the realm of outdated hocus-pocus, but the Bard still saw some truth in it; in Macbeth, there is a recurring sense that, when the world is sick with some great wrong, its first symptoms manifest in the behavior of birds. When the “fatal bellman” the owl shrieks in the night, Lady Macbeth takes it as a sign that her husband is about his bloody business. The day after the murder of Duncan, as Ross converses with an Old Man about the strange things they’ve seen the previous night, “unnatural/Even as the deed that’s done”, the killing of a falcon by a mousing-owl–an omen straight out of Sophocles–is mentioned before the madness and cannibalism of Duncan’s horses, even though the latter would surely be more immediately noticeable and ghastly than the former.
These are the most obvious examples of birds as ill omens in Macbeth; yet even the more innocuous invocations of birds throughout the rest of the play continually turn our thoughts back to the ancient Greek understanding of fate and prophecy, and thereby remind us that, however savagely he may fight at Dunsinane, Macbeth’s fate is as fixed as that of Oedipus. The birds have already foretold all.
Note 1: The closest thing there is to this kind of fatalness in another Shakespearean tragedy is the several superstitious occurrences in Julius Caesar–both the soothsayer’s message of “Beware the ides of March” and the bestial portents such as the lack of a heart in an offering and the whelping of a lioness in the streets. Still, I will insist that these omens do not convey a sense of fatedness to the audience as strongly as the Weird Sisters in Macbeth by virtue of their being told to Caesar himself, not to Brutus, the play’s true protagonist, and by the fact that Shakespeare elsewhere uses dialogue to throw some doubt upon the idea of predestination: "Men at some times are masters of their fates:/The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars,/But in ourselves, that we are underlings." -I.ii
Note 2: The Liddell-Scott Greek Lexicon identifies at least two separate verbs referring to bird-based divination, both of which are present in the quoted passages: Tiresias uses ορνϊθοσκοπέομαι, observe birds, interpret their flight and cries, while Oedipus uses οιωνίζομαι, take omens from the flight and cries of birds. The latter term comes from οιωνος, a large bird, bird of prey, such as a vulture or eagle, and so distinguished from a common bird, while the former comes from ορνις, which more generally refers to a bird, including birds of prey and domestic fowls. Birds of both kinds are present in Macbeth; there are οιωναι, such as the “falcon, towering in her pride of place”, as well as ορνες, like the Porter’s goose and cock. I therefore see little value in interrogating the kinds of birds invoked by Shakespeare, the specific cultural associations and significance of the owl, the raven, or the wren; rather, if we reduce them down to their barest existence as birds, animals of the class Aves, and consider them in an ancient Greek light, then things become a bit clearer.
2024.05.14 04:57 Professional_Hat3930 Can I do anything about this?
So I’m on probation for 4 years for negligent homicide of a motor vehicle and I can get early release after 2 years. I was not on drugs , not on my phone. They said I rolled a stop sign and the man on the motorcycle was speeding 80 in a 45 with a dangerous intersection sign. He passed away on impact because he was not wearing any protective gear and I was going less than 5mph. It was a small town and the wife grew up with the DA so I was screwed from the jump. I started probation in November and in January I had a repeated felony take a picture of my UA paperwork he got my address and phone number. He texted me while I was still in the office I thought it was a random person that had the wrong number until he continued the conversation after being told he had the wrong number and asking if I was a minor. I looked up his phone number and then texted my PO about the situation and she said she handled it. Nothings happened since but I still get creeped out bc most of his history was with burglary and stalking. Can I got to court and try to get released after only 6 months? I have paid all my dues.
submitted by Professional_Hat3930 to probation [link] [comments]
2024.05.14 04:23 ArcadeUzi Acting strange?
So me an my gf worked at a theater together, a position Opened up in another state tht I applied for, an me an my gf applied well she got hired an I didn't. I forget about it, she moved to the other state an we still talk all day everyday cus I'm gunna b moving up there as well jus taking me a little more time but I'll b up there in about a month or two, well slowly inside it's been eating me up as to why I didn't get hired there as I'm her boss an know more about the industry an been there longer....now I'm not full of myself and know some ppl are either jus better or just dont want you, ok I can deal with tht but idk why shes keeping it a secret from me..
Now to side off from tht "it'll come back later" I was looking at apartments by her an she made the comment "you don't have to be on top of me", "ok" I thought, let me back off a little an not text her an let her initiate conversation, well I didn't text frst for 5 days an she didn't text or call me once, I texted yesterday saying "tell your mom I said happy mother's day" she texted back an we sent 4 messages to each other me sending the last text of random chitchat an again nothing the rest of the day..
Finally today I told her how I felt saying what the heck? If I don't text you we don't talk? She's claiming she never said the on top of me comment an finally admitted to knowing the exact reason I didn't get hired but was keeping it from me as even though it's life one of my biggest insecurities is knowing/feeling like I'm not good enough for someone/something...but still it doesn't help hiding the truth from me regardless if it's for my benefit or not... Iv never hid anything from her so why do tht to me...again I get that your jus not wanted or someone is better, yes it's my insecurity BUT if ur my friend you should tell me so I can better myself an make the change...am I being sensitive and over dramatic or is she being strange an mabey I should just back off for a while....
I mean cut out all the ontop of me an job talk she still didnt text or call me for FIVE DAYS! Like idk if she can easily do tht mabey the future isn't good for us?
submitted by ArcadeUzi to Advice [link] [comments]
Now to side off from tht "it'll come back later" I was looking at apartments by her an she made the comment "you don't have to be on top of me", "ok" I thought, let me back off a little an not text her an let her initiate conversation, well I didn't text frst for 5 days an she didn't text or call me once, I texted yesterday saying "tell your mom I said happy mother's day" she texted back an we sent 4 messages to each other me sending the last text of random chitchat an again nothing the rest of the day..
Finally today I told her how I felt saying what the heck? If I don't text you we don't talk? She's claiming she never said the on top of me comment an finally admitted to knowing the exact reason I didn't get hired but was keeping it from me as even though it's life one of my biggest insecurities is knowing/feeling like I'm not good enough for someone/something...but still it doesn't help hiding the truth from me regardless if it's for my benefit or not... Iv never hid anything from her so why do tht to me...again I get that your jus not wanted or someone is better, yes it's my insecurity BUT if ur my friend you should tell me so I can better myself an make the change...am I being sensitive and over dramatic or is she being strange an mabey I should just back off for a while....
I mean cut out all the ontop of me an job talk she still didnt text or call me for FIVE DAYS! Like idk if she can easily do tht mabey the future isn't good for us?
2024.05.14 02:31 Street-Razzmatazz978 Dev Release 29
May 14, 2024 Dev Release 29 Greeting BlockDAG Community,
Hope you'll had a blasting weekend Building on our BlockDAG Mining Discussion: Following up on our conversation about mining algorithms last week, let's delve deeper into the RandomX protocol. It emerged as a promising candidate during our discussions, and we believe it warrants a closer technical examination to understand its suitability for our BlockDAG project.
Key Points:
We'll be resuming our exploration of BlockDAG mining implementation. As a reminder, Mondays are typically filled with planning meetings. Building on our initial discussion about mining algorithms, let's focus on RandomX.
We'll explore the technical aspects of RandomX to assess its viability. What is RandomX protocol and let's understand the importance for us RandomX has become a cornerstone for many blockchain projects prioritizing decentralization and fair mining practices. This Proof-of-Work (PoW) algorithm stands out for its focus on CPU utilization, making it resistant to specialized hardware like ASICs.
There are various reasons why we're considering it as an optimized algorithm for us:
Performance Optimization:
While RandomX is CPU-centric, knowledge of its workings can help optimize mining software for better performance on specific CPU architectures. CPU mining allows regular users to participate in the mining process, fostering a more inclusive network.
Security Audits:
Familiarity with RandomX's design principles can aid in security audits, allowing you to identify potential vulnerabilities in your own PoW implementation. The algorithm leverages established cryptographic tools like AES, Blake2, and Argon2 to ensure overall security.
As we claim for performance and security this protocol has been our very first choice for the algorithm.
RandomX in BlockDAG:
A Technical Deep Dive RandomX achieves its CPU-friendliness and ASIC resistance through a combination of techniques:
Random Code Execution: Pseudo Code: function GenerateRandomInstruction():
// Generate random instruction from SRVVM instruction set
// (integefloating-point arithmetic, conditional branches, memory access)
return instruction
function GenerateProgram():
program = [] for i in range(program_size):
The algorithm dynamically generates instructions (code) at runtime using the SRVVM instruction set. This thwarts ASICs, which are designed to excel at executing pre-defined sets of instructions efficiently.
Now let's get into the implementation of RandomX protocol in BlockDAG:
As our blockchain is DAG (Directed Acyclic Graph) based, the mining process and consensus mechanism may differ from a traditional blockchain with a linear structure. In a BlockDAG blockchain, transactions will be represented as vertices in a graph, and blocks are not necessarily organized in a linear sequence.
RandomX algorithm Here's how the RandomX algorithm could be adapted for BlockDAG:
Transaction Inclusion: Miners select transactions from the DAG to include in the block they are mining. These transactions will be chosen based on factors like transaction fees and priority.
RandomX Initialization:
The RandomX algorithm initializes a dataset based on the state of the DAG. However, since the DAG structure may change dynamically with new transactions, the dataset initialization process needs to account for this by incorporating the latest DAG state.
Cache Initialization:
Miners create a cache from the RandomX dataset, as before, but they may need to adjust the cache creation process to accommodate the DAG structure. Each mining thread creates its own cache, potentially incorporating different parts of the dataset based on the DAG state.
Mining Process:
Miners execute the RandomX hashing function on the cache and the block data, as before. The resulting hash is compared against the target difficulty, and if it meets the criteria, the miner successfully mines a block.
function RandomX(cache, input):
// Perform a series of mathematical operations on the cache and input
// to generate a hash result
result = ComputeHash(cache, input)
return result
function MineBlock():
// Initialize RandomX dataset based on the current state of the DAG
dataset = InitializeDataset()
// Create cache for each mining thread
for thread in mining_threads:
while true:
Detailed pseudo code Here is the detailed pseudo code our implementation:
function GenerateRandomInstruction():
// Generates a random instruction from the SRVVM instruction set
// (includes integefloating-point arithmetic, conditional branches, memory access)
return instruction
function GenerateProgram():
program = []
for i in range(program_size): program.append(GenerateRandomInstruction())
return program
function InitializeRandomXDataset(dag):
// Initialize RandomX dataset based on the current state of the DAG
dataset = [] for vertex in dag.vertices: dataset.append(Hash(vertex.data))
// Hashing each vertex's data for dataset initialization
return dataset
function CreateCache(dataset):
// Create cache for RandomX computation
cache = []
for i in range(cache_size):
// Perform RandomX hashing function on cache and input
result = ComputeHash(cache, input)
return result
function MineBlock(dag, mining_threads):
// Initialize RandomX dataset based on the current state of the DAG
dataset = InitializeRandomXDataset(dag)
// Create cache for each mining thread
for thread in mining_threads:
while true:
submitted by Street-Razzmatazz978 to BDAGminer [link] [comments]
Hope you'll had a blasting weekend Building on our BlockDAG Mining Discussion: Following up on our conversation about mining algorithms last week, let's delve deeper into the RandomX protocol. It emerged as a promising candidate during our discussions, and we believe it warrants a closer technical examination to understand its suitability for our BlockDAG project.
Key Points:
We'll be resuming our exploration of BlockDAG mining implementation. As a reminder, Mondays are typically filled with planning meetings. Building on our initial discussion about mining algorithms, let's focus on RandomX.
We'll explore the technical aspects of RandomX to assess its viability. What is RandomX protocol and let's understand the importance for us RandomX has become a cornerstone for many blockchain projects prioritizing decentralization and fair mining practices. This Proof-of-Work (PoW) algorithm stands out for its focus on CPU utilization, making it resistant to specialized hardware like ASICs.
There are various reasons why we're considering it as an optimized algorithm for us:
Performance Optimization:
While RandomX is CPU-centric, knowledge of its workings can help optimize mining software for better performance on specific CPU architectures. CPU mining allows regular users to participate in the mining process, fostering a more inclusive network.
Security Audits:
Familiarity with RandomX's design principles can aid in security audits, allowing you to identify potential vulnerabilities in your own PoW implementation. The algorithm leverages established cryptographic tools like AES, Blake2, and Argon2 to ensure overall security.
As we claim for performance and security this protocol has been our very first choice for the algorithm.
RandomX in BlockDAG:
A Technical Deep Dive RandomX achieves its CPU-friendliness and ASIC resistance through a combination of techniques:
Random Code Execution: Pseudo Code: function GenerateRandomInstruction():
// Generate random instruction from SRVVM instruction set
// (integefloating-point arithmetic, conditional branches, memory access)
return instruction
function GenerateProgram():
program = [] for i in range(program_size):
program.append(GenerateRandomInstruction())return program
The algorithm dynamically generates instructions (code) at runtime using the SRVVM instruction set. This thwarts ASICs, which are designed to excel at executing pre-defined sets of instructions efficiently.
Now let's get into the implementation of RandomX protocol in BlockDAG:
As our blockchain is DAG (Directed Acyclic Graph) based, the mining process and consensus mechanism may differ from a traditional blockchain with a linear structure. In a BlockDAG blockchain, transactions will be represented as vertices in a graph, and blocks are not necessarily organized in a linear sequence.
RandomX algorithm Here's how the RandomX algorithm could be adapted for BlockDAG:
Transaction Inclusion: Miners select transactions from the DAG to include in the block they are mining. These transactions will be chosen based on factors like transaction fees and priority.
RandomX Initialization:
The RandomX algorithm initializes a dataset based on the state of the DAG. However, since the DAG structure may change dynamically with new transactions, the dataset initialization process needs to account for this by incorporating the latest DAG state.
Cache Initialization:
Miners create a cache from the RandomX dataset, as before, but they may need to adjust the cache creation process to accommodate the DAG structure. Each mining thread creates its own cache, potentially incorporating different parts of the dataset based on the DAG state.
Mining Process:
Miners execute the RandomX hashing function on the cache and the block data, as before. The resulting hash is compared against the target difficulty, and if it meets the criteria, the miner successfully mines a block.
- Verification: Other nodes in the network verify the mined block by independently executing the RandomX hashing function and validating the transactions included in the block. Since the blockchain is DAG-based, nodes may need to traverse the DAG to verify the transactions' validity.
function RandomX(cache, input):
// Perform a series of mathematical operations on the cache and input
// to generate a hash result
result = ComputeHash(cache, input)
return result
function MineBlock():
// Initialize RandomX dataset based on the current state of the DAG
dataset = InitializeDataset()
// Create cache for each mining thread
for thread in mining_threads:
cache[thread] = CreateCache(dataset)// Mining loop
while true:
for thread in mining_threads: // Select transactions to include in the block from the DAG selected_transactions = SelectTransactionsFromDAG() // Execute RandomX hashing function on cache and block data hash_result = RandomX(cache[thread], selected_transactions) // Check if hash result meets difficulty criteria if hash_result < target_difficulty: // Block successfully mined return hash_resultThis pseudocode outlines the basic steps involved in mining a block on BlockDAG using the RandomX algorithm.
Detailed pseudo code Here is the detailed pseudo code our implementation:
function GenerateRandomInstruction():
// Generates a random instruction from the SRVVM instruction set
// (includes integefloating-point arithmetic, conditional branches, memory access)
return instruction
function GenerateProgram():
program = []
for i in range(program_size): program.append(GenerateRandomInstruction())
return program
function InitializeRandomXDataset(dag):
// Initialize RandomX dataset based on the current state of the DAG
dataset = [] for vertex in dag.vertices: dataset.append(Hash(vertex.data))
// Hashing each vertex's data for dataset initialization
return dataset
function CreateCache(dataset):
// Create cache for RandomX computation
cache = []
for i in range(cache_size):
cache.append(dataset[RandomIndexInRange(0, len(dataset))]) // Randomly select dataset entries for cache return cachefunction RandomX(cache, input):
// Perform RandomX hashing function on cache and input
result = ComputeHash(cache, input)
return result
function MineBlock(dag, mining_threads):
// Initialize RandomX dataset based on the current state of the DAG
dataset = InitializeRandomXDataset(dag)
// Create cache for each mining thread
for thread in mining_threads:
cache[thread] = CreateCache(dataset)// Mining loop
while true:
for thread in mining_threads: // Select transactions to include in the block from the DAG selected_transactions = SelectTransactionsFromDAG(dag) // Execute RandomX hashing function on cache and block data hash_result = RandomX(cache[thread], selected_transactions) // Check if hash result meets difficulty criteria if hash_result < target_difficulty: // Block successfully mined return hash_resultStay tuned! As we move forward towards the core of the technical implementation these algorithms will become more and more meaningful. Stay tuned for further updates!
2024.05.14 02:01 Uh-Usernames "Ingeterra Museum of History"
 | [ Context : Saturday, 11:32Am ] submitted by Uh-Usernames to GachaClubPOV [link] [comments] It was your average Saturday morning. The sun was out and there was naught but a cloud or two in the sky. As for you, you were sitting on the couch of your house or apartment, playing on your phone or possibly watching TV for the past hour or so. You hadn't really done anything the night prior, as you didn't really have the energy to because of either work or school, so you just went to bed. As for today, you didn't really have any plans. You had all your work or assignments finished the day or few before; sure, you could play video games or read a book, things of that nature, but none of that really sounded interesting at the moment. In all honesty, you were just a wee bit bored. After a couple more seconds, you'd look up from the TV or phone, and would just sit there for a moment. You hadn't really explored around this town yet, as your day to day trips usually involve either school or work and then home, with the occasional stop by at a restaurant or grocery store. Maybe you should head out and about? Get away from the house and venture around? Granted though, that also sounded like a bit of a hassle, causing you to just sit there and have this debate with yourself. "Ehh.... Fuck it, might as well.." You said to yourself after a couple of minutes. You would get up and reach for the remote, turning your TV off. You would then put your phone in your pocket. You decided you might as well get up and explore around town. "It's good for the soul! Wink". After changing, you would exit your place and just begin to wander around for a bit, sort of like a lost puppy or something. Walk-in around the town you reside, you would come across a multitude of different buildings: Clothing stores, Car Stores, Fast-food joints, the works pretty much. Though, none of them really caught your eye. After all, who would want to walk around 'John and Marry's Wedding Shop' for fun? After a solid half an hour or so, you sort of beginning to regret your decision; it was hot, boring, and you were beginning to grow tired of the constant walking. In all honesty, you were really starting to crave your home again. However, against better interests, you would continue to march on, determined to accomplish something, anything, out here, even if it killed you for some reason. After a solid 5 or more minutes of walking, you begin to approach a rather large building in the distance. You couldn't exactly read much of what it said, but, off appearances alond, it look rather neet. You would begin to speed walk your way over there, determined to figure out what this building was. After a few minutes, the engraving on the front of the building would become clear. "Ingeterra Museum Of World History" Ah... That's... Probably a bit of a let down.. or maybe it wasn't, it all depends on what you are into. You would sort of stop and look at it for a couple of minutes. You were sort of hesitant to keep going, as part of you would much rather head home and do something else, while the other half wanted to do something out and about. However, after looking at it for a few more seconds, you'd notice a small sign in front of the museum. From the distance, you couldn't really make out much of what it said, so you would begin to walk over. It would take you a couple of minutes to get over; however, once you were able to get in front, you would be able to stop and read the sign. "Now.. tickets for a dollar; Weekend special... "OnLy fIvE BuCkS"" You muttered to yourself. You would glance around a bit, noticing the sight of pretty much no one. It seems most people weren't really all that interested; although, that also meant that, if you wanted, you could probably get in there quickly and Cheaply, and probably with no one to bother you. It sort of sealed the deal; you were going into this museum. [ PoV : 12:32PM ] You would walk up the stares of the Museum, reaching the top where the entrance was. It was sort of odd that no one was here as this place was rather clean and grand; granted, most people and been in this town longer than you have, so it sort of made sense. Upon opening the door, you would be greeted with a those metal entry booths that you typically see in a subway or airport. On them was a little screen and area that you could either put your card or money into. You would walk over and pay the 5 dollar toll, allowing the metal entry light to turn green and allow you to walk through it. Upon entering, you would see a couple of people on the inside. It was a giant open room, with multiple different things to look at and even interact with. There were also hallways diverging off into their own separate things. As for you, it was your choice; what do you want to explore first? --------------------------------------------------------------------------.- [ A ] : Early Human History Exhibit [ B ] : Maximus Imperium Exhibit [ C ] : Medieval Exhibit [ D ] : The Kat'herine Dynasty exhibit [ E ] : Imperialism Exhibit [ F ] : The Trotz Exhibit [ G ] : Clavahabena Exhibit [ H ] : Modern history Exhibit --------------------------------------------------------------------------.- . Large main room --------------------------------------------------------------------------.- [ I ] : The Dinosaur Exhibit [ II ] : Pre-Human Exhibit [ III ] : Conspiracy Exhibit [ IV ] : Automotive Exhibit [ V ] : Explore... --------------------------------------------------------------------------.- Rules --------------------------------------------------------------------------.-
|
2024.05.13 23:58 SunshineStodder Tilt Table Test
I am currently in the process of trying to get diagnosed, I did my tilt table test, I was having a pretty good day symptom wise, after the test I felt pretty sick but managed. I just got my results and Im not sure how to read them and the doctor that did said it was negative for PoTs. I do see my heartrate jumps 40 bpm on the tilt and stays about 10bpm faster than baseline (which they got baseline right after starting an IV and personally I've seen my resting heart rate sit at 65bpm pretty regularly.) the cardiologist who read the report is not my regular cardiologist so i do have them faxing the results over so she can read them herself. Just feeling confused and frustrated with this
submitted by SunshineStodder to POTS [link] [comments]
2024.05.13 23:56 juliaxyz 8 year old male - abdominal pain since February
Son 8.5 M, 45 lbs has abdominal pain since February. He doesn't go to school and stays in bed most of the time. It happened before but not as severe and went away after a month or so. We realize we need to wait longer for Amitripltyne to work but we are concened that he has rear good days (hours) and in bed most of the time. Normally he is a bright, fun and social boy and now doesn't leave his bed. Could this be something not tested for?
Current Outpatient Medications
famotidine 40 MG/5ML Recon susp - Take 2 mL (16 mg) by mouth at bedtime
gabapentin (Neurontin) 250 MG/5ML Solution Take 3 mL (150 mg) by mouth twice a day
8.5 years old has been constipating for many years. He has been diagnosed with encopresis in 2021. Ever since he was diagnosed with encopresis He was on MiraLAX .5 to .75 cup twice a day. This helped him to control his constipation. During all this time except for approximately a few weeks he was soiling his pants almost daily. He was also frequently complaining about abdominal pain. Per doctor’s recommendation we were reminding him to sit on the toilet after each meal. Feeding him with homemade meals and we try to limit processed food. We did physical therapy and psychologist therapy. He has a toilet foot stool and seat.
About 1 year ago (January 2023), a bowel cleanup was performed per Max’s pediatrician recommendations. One cupful of MiraLAX was given every 3 hours. (No fasting or clear food diet was recommended)
During that time evacuated lots of poops with diarrhea content. We did not achieve the yellow fluid and stopped after a couple of days. Since this cleanup Max experienced severe abdominal pain for about a month.
Per GI doctor recommendation, we were no longer doing cleanup to avoid severe abdominal pain. Instead, Max was back on his MiraLAX dose .75 cup twice a day with fiber gummies 4mg a day.
He has good apetite most of the time, except after a dose of Exlax. His stool was always help soft over these years.
Notes from GI visit April 22nd - Today he has more guarding, mild distension and tenderness. I can't tell if he has a surgical abdomen (ie volvulus, appendicitis) but it is not associated with vomiting or eating. His most likely diagnosis is abdominal migraines (abdominal pain and headaches) and anxiety at this point, but the pattern has been consistent without as much good days. Activity makes him worse, and we have considered ACNES as well. He has had multiple cleanouts, and the periodic soiling could be from inattentiveness. Perhaps this is from constipation, but should rule out surgical abdomen at this time. We had a long conversation today about abdominal migraines, but upon repeat exam, it is still quite guarded. Pain is daily / off and on. Has had 2 good days in last 3 weeks Appetite is good except when pain is high. No vomiting. Stooling daily with miralax. Sleeping well.
UPPER Endoscopy Diagnosis
A. Duodenum, mucosal biopsy:- Duodenal mucosa with no pathologic change. B. Duodenum, bulb, mucosal biopsy:- Duodenal mucosa with a small lamina propria lymphoid aggregate. C. Stomach, antrum/body, mucosal biopsy: - Antral-and oxyntic-type gastric mucosa with focal features of mild reactive (chemical) gastropathy. D. Esophagus, distal, mucosal biopsy: - Squamous epithelium with rare intraepithelial eosinophils (up to 2 per high-power field). E. Esophagus, proximal, mucosal biopsy:- Squamous epithelium with rare intraepithelial eosinophils (up to 1 per high-power field).
The overall findings are nonspecific. The esophageal findings do not meet threshold numerical criteria for a diagnosis of eosinophilic esophagitis. Reflux related changes are favored. Clinical correlation is recommended.
Blood tests - Collection date: April 30, 2024 11:08 AM
Lactase 13.9 Normal value: >=14.0 nmol/min/mg Prot
Sucrase 51.0 Normal value: >=19.0 nmol/min/mg Prot
Maltase 201.3 Normal value: >=70.0 nmol/min/mg Prot
Palatinase 15.8 Normal value: >=6.0 nmol/min/mg Prot
Glucoamylase 24.2 Normal value: >=8.0 nmol/min/mg Prot
submitted by juliaxyz to AskDocs [link] [comments]
Current Outpatient Medications
famotidine 40 MG/5ML Recon susp - Take 2 mL (16 mg) by mouth at bedtime
gabapentin (Neurontin) 250 MG/5ML Solution Take 3 mL (150 mg) by mouth twice a day
hyoscyamine 0.125 MG Tab - does not help
amitriptyline 10 mg Tab - full dosage started May 2nd, makes him agressive
Medical History Summary:8.5 years old has been constipating for many years. He has been diagnosed with encopresis in 2021. Ever since he was diagnosed with encopresis He was on MiraLAX .5 to .75 cup twice a day. This helped him to control his constipation. During all this time except for approximately a few weeks he was soiling his pants almost daily. He was also frequently complaining about abdominal pain. Per doctor’s recommendation we were reminding him to sit on the toilet after each meal. Feeding him with homemade meals and we try to limit processed food. We did physical therapy and psychologist therapy. He has a toilet foot stool and seat.
About 1 year ago (January 2023), a bowel cleanup was performed per Max’s pediatrician recommendations. One cupful of MiraLAX was given every 3 hours. (No fasting or clear food diet was recommended)
During that time evacuated lots of poops with diarrhea content. We did not achieve the yellow fluid and stopped after a couple of days. Since this cleanup Max experienced severe abdominal pain for about a month.
Per GI doctor recommendation, we were no longer doing cleanup to avoid severe abdominal pain. Instead, Max was back on his MiraLAX dose .75 cup twice a day with fiber gummies 4mg a day.
He has good apetite most of the time, except after a dose of Exlax. His stool was always help soft over these years.
Notes from GI visit April 22nd - Today he has more guarding, mild distension and tenderness. I can't tell if he has a surgical abdomen (ie volvulus, appendicitis) but it is not associated with vomiting or eating. His most likely diagnosis is abdominal migraines (abdominal pain and headaches) and anxiety at this point, but the pattern has been consistent without as much good days. Activity makes him worse, and we have considered ACNES as well. He has had multiple cleanouts, and the periodic soiling could be from inattentiveness. Perhaps this is from constipation, but should rule out surgical abdomen at this time. We had a long conversation today about abdominal migraines, but upon repeat exam, it is still quite guarded. Pain is daily / off and on. Has had 2 good days in last 3 weeks Appetite is good except when pain is high. No vomiting. Stooling daily with miralax. Sleeping well.
UPPER Endoscopy Diagnosis
A. Duodenum, mucosal biopsy:- Duodenal mucosa with no pathologic change. B. Duodenum, bulb, mucosal biopsy:- Duodenal mucosa with a small lamina propria lymphoid aggregate. C. Stomach, antrum/body, mucosal biopsy: - Antral-and oxyntic-type gastric mucosa with focal features of mild reactive (chemical) gastropathy. D. Esophagus, distal, mucosal biopsy: - Squamous epithelium with rare intraepithelial eosinophils (up to 2 per high-power field). E. Esophagus, proximal, mucosal biopsy:- Squamous epithelium with rare intraepithelial eosinophils (up to 1 per high-power field).
The overall findings are nonspecific. The esophageal findings do not meet threshold numerical criteria for a diagnosis of eosinophilic esophagitis. Reflux related changes are favored. Clinical correlation is recommended.
CT ABDOMEN PELVIS W CONTRAST
Narrative
IMPRESSION:Normal appendix. No CT evidence of inflammatory changes in the abdomen or pelvis. Moderate stool burden in the colon.NarrativeINDICATION: o appendicitis/abscess - GI requesting CT d/t guarding/distensionEXAMINATION: CT ABDOMEN AND PELVIS WITH CONTRAST - CT Abdomen And Pelvis W/ Contrast InjectionTECHNIQUE: Multiple axial images were obtained of the abdomen and pelvis following IV contrast. A radiation dose optimizationtechnique was used for this scan. DLP: 29.8 , CTDI vol: 0.63IV Contrast dosage and agent: 63 mL of Isovue 300Oral contrast: Administered.COMPARISON: None.____________________________________________FINDINGS:LOWER CHEST: Lung bases are clear without any infiltrate. No pleural effusion noted. There is no cardiomegaly or pericardialeffusion.LIVER: The liver has a homogeneous density. No focal masses noted. There is no intrahepatic biliary ductal dilatation.GALLBLADDER AND BILIARY TREE: No calcified gallstones. No gallbladder distension or wall edema. No intra- or extrahepaticbiliary ductal dilation.PANCREAS: No focal cystic or solid mass. There is no pancreatic ductal dilatation or peripancreatic fluid.SPLEEN: Normal size without focal cystic or solid mass.ADRENAL GLANDS: Normal.KIDNEYS AND URETERS: Both kidneys have a normal enhancement without hydronephrosis, renal cysts, masses or perinephric fluid.There is no hydroureter.PERITONEUM: No ascites or free air. No other fluid collection.BOWEL: No abnormal dilatation of the bowel loops is noted. Contrast is noted in several nondilated small bowel loops and in thecolon up to the splenic flexure. Moderate stool noted in the colon, including the rectum. Terminal ileum is visualized andappears normal. A normal caliber partially contrast filled appendix is seen in the right lower quadrant. A few scattered foci ofair also noted in the appendix. No adjacent inflammatory changes are seen. The appendix is best visualized on axial series #2,images 58-69/139.LYMPH NODES: No enlarged mesenteric or retroperitoneal lymph nodes.VESSELS: Vasculature appears normal. No stenosis or aneurysmal dilatation noted.URINARY BLADDER: Appears normal without wall thickening, mass or trabeculations.REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS: No pelvic masses.ABDOMINAL WALL: No discrete abdominal or pelvic wall hernia.BONES: No lytic or blastic abnormality.Blood tests - Collection date: April 30, 2024 11:08 AM
Lactase 13.9 Normal value: >=14.0 nmol/min/mg Prot
Sucrase 51.0 Normal value: >=19.0 nmol/min/mg Prot
Maltase 201.3 Normal value: >=70.0 nmol/min/mg Prot
Palatinase 15.8 Normal value: >=6.0 nmol/min/mg Prot
Glucoamylase 24.2 Normal value: >=8.0 nmol/min/mg Prot
Sed Rate 9
Ferritin 24.7
C-Reactive Protein < .5
Lead, Venous, B <.1
White Blood Count 5.98
Hemoglobin 14.7
Mean Cell Volume 81.8
MCHC 34.5
Platelet Count 302
Red Blood Count 5.21
Hematocrit 42.6
MCH 28.2
RDW 12.4
MPV 8.8
Segmented Neutrophils (ABS #) 2.35
Final Absolute Neutrophil Count 2.35
Lymphocytes (ABS #) 3.8
Eosinophils (ABS #) 0.05
Immature Granulocytes (ABS #) 0Monocytes (ABS #) .47
Basophils (ABS #) .03
Add: he has headaches on the right side and sensativity to light, not sure how often but at least several times a week.2024.05.13 22:36 CuriousAnachronism 24 [M4M] Germany/Europe/Online - Fiat iustitia, et pereat mundus
Prologue
Hello and welcome to my post. I will subdivide this into two large parts. One will cover my thoughts, feelings, my hopes and dreams...While the other will tell you the specifics of how I pass the time, what topics interest me, what passions do I posses. I believe that at the end of this leap into my inner world, you dear reader, will have all the necessary information to judge whether we are compatible or not.
Part I
I am writing this in the hopes of finding something that I lack. Lately I have had this feeling, this tinge of melancholy within the dephts of my being, this yearning to find a kindred spirit, another Soul, much like mine, to form a bond with. Perhaps Loneliness is the right word for what is bothering me, but to use it seems to carry with it a connotation of ungratefulness. Ungratefulness for the people that I do have in my life, although none of them, of course, have the connection to me that I seek here.
I have found it increasingly necessary to seek in this Life a sort of purity of thought. What I mean is, I have began to undestand what ideas and concepts are ultimately compatible with my inner most Self, ergo what guidelines I have to follow to feel the most whole. Naturally I have likewise realised what I cannot add to my Self and what I will henceforth reject with all the power that I posses.
With this new context in mind, I now follow on the path of self improvement. I will now begin to mold my Self into my perfected idea of how the Self should be. This is certainly a significant undertaking, one that will not be easy to follow through on but one that I ultimately have to do. To me such context is essential. It is akin to a Guiding Star shining in the night. I will follow this Star for without it I am lost in the vast Darkness.
Looking back at my life, it was suboptimal, especially if one compares the way it molded me to how I will now mold myself. I suppose I must look on with a hint of regret at all that time which one might consider to be lost. Still... I try to stave off such decisively negative interpretations, after all, I have ultimately came to these conclusions. That means that somewhere along the line I had to have picked up on enough of such ideas for them to become so cemented in my consciousness. Well, either that or I was always like this, but in that case I can at least thank my life up to this point for not being able to supress such manifestations of my inner most Self.
To add to the topic of my life, I must admit that not all the battles have yet been won, not all the Demons vanquished, not every Mountain climbed. I want you to keep such things in mind when deciding whether or not to approach me. Many will shy away, I undestand that much, but the pursuit of true Companionship is just another such battle. Having said all that I do believe that being able to overcome hurdles together carries with it a certain appeal. That is to say, what's the fun in joining once the Game is already over?
I don't shy away from such challenges, perhaps to a fault. Certain troubles that I faced in the past carry with them a long shadow over my current health and well being. Still, I intend to change little in this regard other than the proficiency with which I will clash the current of my Will against the cliffs of Life.
Part II
In this part of my post I will tell you about my interests and hobbies, I will try to be thorough, commonality in this regard is rather important to build a relationship
History. I have had an interest in history for almost a decade now, it started back in school and developed from there. Well, now that I think about it one could argue that it started even earlier in my life as I liked watching the odd historic documentary or film aired on television but it wasn't regular back then, I never actively sought it out. I am mostly interested in European history in the period between the 18th-20th century but I sometimes branch out to other time periods and other parts of the world. I watch various channels related to history and read articles and sometimes books. I have recently got a few books on the German revolution of 1848/1849 and a historical magazine on the Thirty Years' War. Besides that I try to visit museums sometimes.
Literature. Especially old novels. I like to immerse myself in the Worlds of these books, I tend to read them while listening to thematically fitting music and take my time with them. One time you are following a troubled Youth in his quest for spiritual understanding of the world, another you see the aged and decrepit Doctor gambling his very Soul on the promises of abtaining satisfaction in earthy pleasures, then again your olfaction notices the most pleasant scent known to man even as the one eminating it has the appearance of a revolting Frog. These and many other stories open up to you once you decide to set foot into the literary World.
Languages. I know three, with one being a bit rusty. I am currently working intently on strengthening it. I believe that if I continue to apply myself in this regard then I should be able to finally conquer it. What language am I working on? Well, if you were to stack all the major works in it they would be as tall as a house... It is fun to go through different works in multiple languages, the same goes for film, games and such.
Games. I recently played Cyberpunk 2077. Well as recently as I played any major story centric game. Now that the dust has settled and the bugs mostly removed...It's not that bad. The main questline at least. Besides that I tried Fallout 76 (Very average, I'm dissapointed with what they made the "RPG" system) and I might give Deus Ex Manking Divided another spin (since it's somewhat similar to Cyberpunk when it comes to its aesthetics). Dark Souls is one of my favorite series, I still haven't beaten Elden Ring though. When it came out I wasn't in the right mindset to invest a hundred hours into it, with all those bosses and difficult locations. I think I'll only consider playing it if I am streaming it to someone. I am generally interested in either streaming games or having the person I am talking to stream them to me. To be specific I mean streaming to a single person while being on call. Besides that I'm a big fan of Paradox strategy games, especially Europa Universalis IV and Heats of Iron IV, I tend to only play single player since I find multiplayer with many people to be rather stressful but on the other hand I have nothing against a co-op game. I'm not the best player though, despite the ammount of hours I have in them. Another great game I would mention would be Dragon's Dogma. A very underrated RPG. I recently beat it again and it was an atmospheric and interesting experience. It is one of those games that feel like they have an endless ammount of depth and constant new secrets to discover.
Anime and Manga. In recent times my interest in them has waned but I still watch the occasional series here and there. Like Cyberpunk Edgerunners (Which I found to be rather mediocre) and the very good first season from the new arc of Bleach. Some of my favourite series include: Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, Death Note, Fate;Zero, Psycho Pass, Code Geass and Attack on Titan. I wouldn't mind if you were to introduce me to some new series, maybe based on the ones I mentioned. My favourite Manga is Berserk which I still follow, althought I am still not certain on the direction that the new author is taking. I suppose it really is a matter of contention whether a somewhat (or considerably warped) vision is better than an unfinished work. One could argue that a few novels remain unfinished and possess a macabre appeal to them as such.
Music. Classical music has a very special place in my heart. A few of my favourite pieces would be: Clair de Lune, Nocturne Op. 9 No.2, Devil's Trill Sonata, Danse Macabre, Valse Sentimentale, Symphony No. 7 in A Major, Op. 92: II. Alegreto (by Beethoven) and Suite from Swan Lake, Op. 20a: I. Scene. Moderato. There are more but these ones always invoke something in me when I listen to them. Besides Classical I also enjoy listening to Synthwave, old Western pop and J-pop, both modern and from the 20th century.
Esotericism. I am interested in things spiritual, mystical, magical and esoteric. I have read religios texts, magical grimoires, introductions to various schools of thought. It is interesting to me.
Epilogue
Hopefully I was able to cast the spotlight upon my inner World in a clear and unequivocal manner. I feel the need to add to the aforementioned that I am rather introverted, which means that I tend to dislike large social gatherings. I managed to condition myself to be able to endure the presense of large groups of people but it isn't something that I would seek out in most cases. Besides that I am neurodivergent and suffer from certain issues with mental health. I have to take medication to keep myself under control. They work well enough but certain days are harder than others. I respect the struggle that others have with mental health but in the context of a relationship I have my limits, no one with BDP for instance. I am also not looking for anything casual. I understand than one cannot demand depth and meaning from a conversation with an absolute stranger, that is akin to trying to build a sand castle right before the waves strike but I ask at least that you enter with a mindset that this might become something of significance. I also do want to say that I am completely Monogamous. My preference? The sickly, pale, intellectual who watches rain droplets slide down the window in Autumn. Lastly, if I enjoy the company of a person I tend to not want to let them go.
Thank you for taking the time to read my post and have a good day. I ask that you send a DM instead of a chat and that you give your thoughts on my title in the opening of your message.
Goodbye...Or perhaps untill we meet again
submitted by CuriousAnachronism to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]
Hello and welcome to my post. I will subdivide this into two large parts. One will cover my thoughts, feelings, my hopes and dreams...While the other will tell you the specifics of how I pass the time, what topics interest me, what passions do I posses. I believe that at the end of this leap into my inner world, you dear reader, will have all the necessary information to judge whether we are compatible or not.
Part I
I am writing this in the hopes of finding something that I lack. Lately I have had this feeling, this tinge of melancholy within the dephts of my being, this yearning to find a kindred spirit, another Soul, much like mine, to form a bond with. Perhaps Loneliness is the right word for what is bothering me, but to use it seems to carry with it a connotation of ungratefulness. Ungratefulness for the people that I do have in my life, although none of them, of course, have the connection to me that I seek here.
I have found it increasingly necessary to seek in this Life a sort of purity of thought. What I mean is, I have began to undestand what ideas and concepts are ultimately compatible with my inner most Self, ergo what guidelines I have to follow to feel the most whole. Naturally I have likewise realised what I cannot add to my Self and what I will henceforth reject with all the power that I posses.
With this new context in mind, I now follow on the path of self improvement. I will now begin to mold my Self into my perfected idea of how the Self should be. This is certainly a significant undertaking, one that will not be easy to follow through on but one that I ultimately have to do. To me such context is essential. It is akin to a Guiding Star shining in the night. I will follow this Star for without it I am lost in the vast Darkness.
Looking back at my life, it was suboptimal, especially if one compares the way it molded me to how I will now mold myself. I suppose I must look on with a hint of regret at all that time which one might consider to be lost. Still... I try to stave off such decisively negative interpretations, after all, I have ultimately came to these conclusions. That means that somewhere along the line I had to have picked up on enough of such ideas for them to become so cemented in my consciousness. Well, either that or I was always like this, but in that case I can at least thank my life up to this point for not being able to supress such manifestations of my inner most Self.
To add to the topic of my life, I must admit that not all the battles have yet been won, not all the Demons vanquished, not every Mountain climbed. I want you to keep such things in mind when deciding whether or not to approach me. Many will shy away, I undestand that much, but the pursuit of true Companionship is just another such battle. Having said all that I do believe that being able to overcome hurdles together carries with it a certain appeal. That is to say, what's the fun in joining once the Game is already over?
I don't shy away from such challenges, perhaps to a fault. Certain troubles that I faced in the past carry with them a long shadow over my current health and well being. Still, I intend to change little in this regard other than the proficiency with which I will clash the current of my Will against the cliffs of Life.
Part II
In this part of my post I will tell you about my interests and hobbies, I will try to be thorough, commonality in this regard is rather important to build a relationship
History. I have had an interest in history for almost a decade now, it started back in school and developed from there. Well, now that I think about it one could argue that it started even earlier in my life as I liked watching the odd historic documentary or film aired on television but it wasn't regular back then, I never actively sought it out. I am mostly interested in European history in the period between the 18th-20th century but I sometimes branch out to other time periods and other parts of the world. I watch various channels related to history and read articles and sometimes books. I have recently got a few books on the German revolution of 1848/1849 and a historical magazine on the Thirty Years' War. Besides that I try to visit museums sometimes.
Literature. Especially old novels. I like to immerse myself in the Worlds of these books, I tend to read them while listening to thematically fitting music and take my time with them. One time you are following a troubled Youth in his quest for spiritual understanding of the world, another you see the aged and decrepit Doctor gambling his very Soul on the promises of abtaining satisfaction in earthy pleasures, then again your olfaction notices the most pleasant scent known to man even as the one eminating it has the appearance of a revolting Frog. These and many other stories open up to you once you decide to set foot into the literary World.
Languages. I know three, with one being a bit rusty. I am currently working intently on strengthening it. I believe that if I continue to apply myself in this regard then I should be able to finally conquer it. What language am I working on? Well, if you were to stack all the major works in it they would be as tall as a house... It is fun to go through different works in multiple languages, the same goes for film, games and such.
Games. I recently played Cyberpunk 2077. Well as recently as I played any major story centric game. Now that the dust has settled and the bugs mostly removed...It's not that bad. The main questline at least. Besides that I tried Fallout 76 (Very average, I'm dissapointed with what they made the "RPG" system) and I might give Deus Ex Manking Divided another spin (since it's somewhat similar to Cyberpunk when it comes to its aesthetics). Dark Souls is one of my favorite series, I still haven't beaten Elden Ring though. When it came out I wasn't in the right mindset to invest a hundred hours into it, with all those bosses and difficult locations. I think I'll only consider playing it if I am streaming it to someone. I am generally interested in either streaming games or having the person I am talking to stream them to me. To be specific I mean streaming to a single person while being on call. Besides that I'm a big fan of Paradox strategy games, especially Europa Universalis IV and Heats of Iron IV, I tend to only play single player since I find multiplayer with many people to be rather stressful but on the other hand I have nothing against a co-op game. I'm not the best player though, despite the ammount of hours I have in them. Another great game I would mention would be Dragon's Dogma. A very underrated RPG. I recently beat it again and it was an atmospheric and interesting experience. It is one of those games that feel like they have an endless ammount of depth and constant new secrets to discover.
Anime and Manga. In recent times my interest in them has waned but I still watch the occasional series here and there. Like Cyberpunk Edgerunners (Which I found to be rather mediocre) and the very good first season from the new arc of Bleach. Some of my favourite series include: Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, Death Note, Fate;Zero, Psycho Pass, Code Geass and Attack on Titan. I wouldn't mind if you were to introduce me to some new series, maybe based on the ones I mentioned. My favourite Manga is Berserk which I still follow, althought I am still not certain on the direction that the new author is taking. I suppose it really is a matter of contention whether a somewhat (or considerably warped) vision is better than an unfinished work. One could argue that a few novels remain unfinished and possess a macabre appeal to them as such.
Music. Classical music has a very special place in my heart. A few of my favourite pieces would be: Clair de Lune, Nocturne Op. 9 No.2, Devil's Trill Sonata, Danse Macabre, Valse Sentimentale, Symphony No. 7 in A Major, Op. 92: II. Alegreto (by Beethoven) and Suite from Swan Lake, Op. 20a: I. Scene. Moderato. There are more but these ones always invoke something in me when I listen to them. Besides Classical I also enjoy listening to Synthwave, old Western pop and J-pop, both modern and from the 20th century.
Esotericism. I am interested in things spiritual, mystical, magical and esoteric. I have read religios texts, magical grimoires, introductions to various schools of thought. It is interesting to me.
Epilogue
Hopefully I was able to cast the spotlight upon my inner World in a clear and unequivocal manner. I feel the need to add to the aforementioned that I am rather introverted, which means that I tend to dislike large social gatherings. I managed to condition myself to be able to endure the presense of large groups of people but it isn't something that I would seek out in most cases. Besides that I am neurodivergent and suffer from certain issues with mental health. I have to take medication to keep myself under control. They work well enough but certain days are harder than others. I respect the struggle that others have with mental health but in the context of a relationship I have my limits, no one with BDP for instance. I am also not looking for anything casual. I understand than one cannot demand depth and meaning from a conversation with an absolute stranger, that is akin to trying to build a sand castle right before the waves strike but I ask at least that you enter with a mindset that this might become something of significance. I also do want to say that I am completely Monogamous. My preference? The sickly, pale, intellectual who watches rain droplets slide down the window in Autumn. Lastly, if I enjoy the company of a person I tend to not want to let them go.
Thank you for taking the time to read my post and have a good day. I ask that you send a DM instead of a chat and that you give your thoughts on my title in the opening of your message.
Goodbye...Or perhaps untill we meet again
2024.05.13 22:21 Thatsidechara_ter Shoulders and Criers (Taronian 8th Narrative)
[Just a little feel-good post for a few of my characters who haven't seen much screentime as of late, along with some minor lore implications. Enjoy!]
The Regimental headquarters of the Taronian 8th in Waycross was barely lit this late at night. Just a handful of headquarters staff manned the voxes, monitoring the 8th's comms network for any sign of enemy attack.
And in one secluded corner of the room sat Colonel Jethro Arvin, pooring over a timetable for how long it would take to move each element of his regiment up to Fort Ko'Var. He yawned; it was late, and he would need to be fresh in the morning.
But as Corporal Pusher laid a fresh mug of recaf on the table for him, Arvin decided he could fend off sleep for a little longer. "Thanks, Merek." He said; but as his aide turned to leave, he realized he had something else he needed to say. "...wait, hold up for a moment."
Pusher paused and turned, his expression the same. "Sir?"
"There's... something I never said to you... about the day I came back from isolation." Arvin continued, a bit uncomfortable. "I never said thank you."
A little bit of heat rushed Corporal Pusher cheeks, suddenly embarassed. "...oh. that."
Arvin continued. "I don't think I've ever been yelled at like that by a subordinate, and I sure as hell didn't expect you to be the one doing it, but... well, it worked. You got me off my self-pitying arse. For all I know, I might still be sitting in my quarters if it weren't for you, so... thank you, Corporal. Thank you for everything you do for me."
Pusher smiled sheepishly. "No problem, sir. Everyone needs a good haranguing once in a while."
...
"I... assume this conversation is strictly confidential?"
"Yes, please. Sasha would never let me live it down."
Corporal Dallen Konnel sat behind the line of sandbags that made the sentry point of his observation post on top of the building, looking out over the frozen tundra. He didn't mind nights like this, not when everything was quiet except for the steady breathing of himself, and Corporal Kaiya du Ortaal sleeping gently next to him.
Dallen cracked a bit of a smile as he glanced at her. She didn't seem so different from that city girl from Tarokeen he met on Hellion IV all those years ago; a simpler time, for both of them.
His smile faltered when he saw Kaiya's expression change into a grimace, her breath hitch, and her knuckles go completely white as she gripped her lasrifle. She made a little noise, barely-audible, but he picked it up as a whimper. Now she reminded him of a slightly older version of herself, the dead-tired and utterly-terrified young artillerist that had collapsed next to him on the floor of the bulk lander as the Taronian 8th escaped the surface of Cadia just a little under 4 years ago. He knew she was back there now, on Cadia, or Nanthrus, or Lander #2 in it's final descent, scared and alone.
Moving over slightly, Dallen gently eased his arm around Kaiya's shoulders, squeezing her arm just a tad to let her know he was there. He gave her a soft pull, and she didn't resist as her unconscious form slumped againsy his side, her helmet making a soft clack as it collided with his shoulder pad. Her breathing immediately steadied, her grip relaxed, and her grimace dissapeared as a single tear rolled down her cheek and landed on his shoulder pad. He smiled a bit again as he settled in to stay like this until it was time to rotate watches.
This was a nightly ritual, or at least Dallen assumed so. He did this whenever he was on watch and Kaiya was sleeping, and he always found himself waking up in the same position she was currently in when she was on watch and he was sleeping. They didn't talk about it, but that was how he knew what kind of dreams she had; because those were the types of dreams he had.
Dallen sighed again contentedly, scanning the dark tundra with his magnoculars. If he could have stayed like this for all of time, eternally watching over Kaiya as she slept away the eons in complete bliss, he would do it. But that wasn't entirely born of pure selflessness, he knew.
Truth was, Dallen was afraid of what was to come. Ever since the Killacarrier, he knew that he had something to live for, something he could lose at any time. But he wouldn't let that fear overpower him, stop him from fighting for a better tomorrow, no matter how distant that might seem. He owed that much to Colonel Arvin and the 8th, to Guilliman the risen Primarch, to Him on Terra. And, of course, to Kaiya most of all...
After all, everyone needed someone to lean on in their sleep, right?
submitted by Thatsidechara_ter to war_for_Gryllus [link] [comments]
The Regimental headquarters of the Taronian 8th in Waycross was barely lit this late at night. Just a handful of headquarters staff manned the voxes, monitoring the 8th's comms network for any sign of enemy attack.
And in one secluded corner of the room sat Colonel Jethro Arvin, pooring over a timetable for how long it would take to move each element of his regiment up to Fort Ko'Var. He yawned; it was late, and he would need to be fresh in the morning.
But as Corporal Pusher laid a fresh mug of recaf on the table for him, Arvin decided he could fend off sleep for a little longer. "Thanks, Merek." He said; but as his aide turned to leave, he realized he had something else he needed to say. "...wait, hold up for a moment."
Pusher paused and turned, his expression the same. "Sir?"
"There's... something I never said to you... about the day I came back from isolation." Arvin continued, a bit uncomfortable. "I never said thank you."
A little bit of heat rushed Corporal Pusher cheeks, suddenly embarassed. "...oh. that."
Arvin continued. "I don't think I've ever been yelled at like that by a subordinate, and I sure as hell didn't expect you to be the one doing it, but... well, it worked. You got me off my self-pitying arse. For all I know, I might still be sitting in my quarters if it weren't for you, so... thank you, Corporal. Thank you for everything you do for me."
Pusher smiled sheepishly. "No problem, sir. Everyone needs a good haranguing once in a while."
...
"I... assume this conversation is strictly confidential?"
"Yes, please. Sasha would never let me live it down."
Corporal Dallen Konnel sat behind the line of sandbags that made the sentry point of his observation post on top of the building, looking out over the frozen tundra. He didn't mind nights like this, not when everything was quiet except for the steady breathing of himself, and Corporal Kaiya du Ortaal sleeping gently next to him.
Dallen cracked a bit of a smile as he glanced at her. She didn't seem so different from that city girl from Tarokeen he met on Hellion IV all those years ago; a simpler time, for both of them.
His smile faltered when he saw Kaiya's expression change into a grimace, her breath hitch, and her knuckles go completely white as she gripped her lasrifle. She made a little noise, barely-audible, but he picked it up as a whimper. Now she reminded him of a slightly older version of herself, the dead-tired and utterly-terrified young artillerist that had collapsed next to him on the floor of the bulk lander as the Taronian 8th escaped the surface of Cadia just a little under 4 years ago. He knew she was back there now, on Cadia, or Nanthrus, or Lander #2 in it's final descent, scared and alone.
Moving over slightly, Dallen gently eased his arm around Kaiya's shoulders, squeezing her arm just a tad to let her know he was there. He gave her a soft pull, and she didn't resist as her unconscious form slumped againsy his side, her helmet making a soft clack as it collided with his shoulder pad. Her breathing immediately steadied, her grip relaxed, and her grimace dissapeared as a single tear rolled down her cheek and landed on his shoulder pad. He smiled a bit again as he settled in to stay like this until it was time to rotate watches.
This was a nightly ritual, or at least Dallen assumed so. He did this whenever he was on watch and Kaiya was sleeping, and he always found himself waking up in the same position she was currently in when she was on watch and he was sleeping. They didn't talk about it, but that was how he knew what kind of dreams she had; because those were the types of dreams he had.
Dallen sighed again contentedly, scanning the dark tundra with his magnoculars. If he could have stayed like this for all of time, eternally watching over Kaiya as she slept away the eons in complete bliss, he would do it. But that wasn't entirely born of pure selflessness, he knew.
Truth was, Dallen was afraid of what was to come. Ever since the Killacarrier, he knew that he had something to live for, something he could lose at any time. But he wouldn't let that fear overpower him, stop him from fighting for a better tomorrow, no matter how distant that might seem. He owed that much to Colonel Arvin and the 8th, to Guilliman the risen Primarch, to Him on Terra. And, of course, to Kaiya most of all...
After all, everyone needed someone to lean on in their sleep, right?
2024.05.13 21:25 greeneyedgarden This week's Heidi's Lane recap. She really has so much figured out, guys, and she's here to teach you how to be your best self. Her ego is on full display with this one. Enjoy the ride!
 | Heidi’s Lane Podcast. Episode 30, Part II. “My Surrender Formula: Practical Tips For Letting Go Of Control” submitted by greeneyedgarden to hollisUncensored [link] [comments] (OP Notes: Credit where credit is due. Instead of her usual “vague talk;'' in this episode Heidi actually gives some real life examples to make her points. Now, get your post-its ready, she's shilling quote after quote in this one, and you won’t want to miss a moment of her life-changing content. This episode really highlights her delusions of grandeur. Remember when she proudly proclaimed that she ”wasn’t here to teach us, but to love us, and through her love we will be taught?” That era is apparently over. She truly thinks her teachings are changing lives. She “humbly” comes across as having all the secrets to a fulfilled life, while admitting that her content is “just as much for me as it is for you.” BUT ALSO, just like Dave and Rach, she is “teaching” from a place she has no expertise in, and not enough experience in. Let’s just say, her confidence on this topic of “surrender” comes through loud and clear, and by the end of this episode, she wants you to be as enlightened as she is. One more thing, today she blames her panic attacks on her control issues. Heidi, your delusion is showing. Oh, and YES, just like in every episode, she mentions Dave, Chris, her panic attacks, and her challenges.) Parentheses are OP thoughts Her camera isn’t working, so there’s no video of this pod on Youtube. But she’s decided to “let go of control” and “surrender to it.” “This episode will be exactly what it needs to be.” Quote from the book “The Surrender Experiment.” “Do whatever is put in front of you with all your heart and soul, without regard for personal results. Do the work as though it were given to you by the universe, because it was.” And then she reads it to us one more time, with more emphatic and dramatic pauses. Do you try to control your kids, or your spouse, or your parking, or the government? When we try to control them, what we’re saying is that we are God, or we are the universe. Think about your past relationships. Was it a perfect fit? A good fit? Or a terrible fit? Were we so hell bent on having that person want us, we were chasing unavailable love? I’ve done that more times than I want to admit. I was chasing the unavailable. I loved someone who didn’t love me the way I wanted them to. I would try to not have the relationship fall apart. If they could only see how great life would be with me. The more I controlled, the more out of control the situation was. I truly said to God, “Please help this person love me the way that I love them. Please help my kids to see it the way I see it.” They’re not going to. We can’t control what people say about us. I don’t know if this is too much, but I’m going to say it. It was hard for Dave to hear the words that the haters were saying. The bullies. The cyberbullies. For someone to sit and listen and then spend their days attacking people they don’t even know. There’s no life there. They have no life. I have empathy and compassion for them, for their sadness they must experience on a daily basis. I would never do that. I couldn’t do that. It’s not in my DNA. I have too much good in my life, but it was hard for Dave to understand the haters' sadness and misery. They did so much harm to his soul. They hurt him. He would often read what they said. They made fun of his nostrils, or the way he would say something, or something he did in one of my stories. He would then react and try to control it, trying to make them like him. He would shift. He tried to control these people who do not matter. The situation controlled him. For a while I did the same thing, and then I got to the point of saying, “What in the hell am I doing? Why am I letting these people tell me who I am?” I know there are more people out there who appreciate me, those are my people. We can all relate to that. We’ve all had haters. We try to control it. Surrendering is a result of a particular action, the action of letting go. When we don’t, we are saying we are God, we are the universe. Our job is not to control the flow of the universe. Years ago, when I was married to Chris, my mom gave me a card that said, “What would you do without me? You would die without me.” It was a joke. I was a control freak. I am less now, I’m trying to do better. All of us control freaks think that if we step back it will all fall apart. What happens if I can’t control what Boy M does after high school? Or girl M? My employees are laughing right now, because it’s true. When Dave and I were doing the challenges, I was so busy. I’m not sure if Dave was, I mean I’m sure he was busy, too. I was a control freak. I had a wonderful, large army of people helping me achieve my goals. We had challenges, and education courses, and in-person events. We had to show up. We built an app. We had supplements. I was so busy and my level of control freakism was on another level. This was true from 2021 until Dave died. I would do team calls in the morning and afternoon. They were 2 hour calls, sometimes 2 and a half hour calls every morning and afternoon. I couldn’t let my team work without me controlling them. It caused my anxiety attacks. Clearly this behavior affected my body physiologically. I couldn't get out of bed. I stayed in a dark room for a week. I was at a point that I didn’t care if it all fell apart. A phone call would cause another panic attack. What’s interesting is that in my week away, my team thrived. I was a wrench in everyone’s spokes. I learned that week that my job was to lead. I’ve grown so much over the last 2 years. When Dave died I stepped away for a month. I learned that when we step back the world is not going to fall apart. Nature is a rhythm. We can’t control the universe. Our job is to ride the wave. When you go to the beach, watch the surfers. They don’t control the waves, they read them and watch them, they wait, and then they paddle paddle paddle and catch the wave. They embrace the flow. It’s the art of surrender. A quote from Untethered Soul, “Go outside on a clear night and just look up into the sky. You’re sitting on a planet spinning around in the middle of absolutely nowhere. Though you can only see a few thousand stars, there are hundreds of billions of stars in our Milky Way Galaxy alone. It’s estimated there are over a trillion stars in the galaxy. You’re just standing on one little ball of dirt and spinning around one of the stars. From that perspective, do you really care what people think about your clothes or your car? Do you need to feel embarrassed if you forget someone's name? If you want a decent life, don’t devote your life to avoiding psychological pain. What kind of life is that?” Do you feel that? Avoiding pain means it’s always right behind you. When we are controlling we are trying to avoid pain. Are you starting to see? This is reality. We are a blip in the universe. We need to find the flow, to relax, stop trying to drive, to manipulate, and to work. I’m passionate and emotional about this. Now that you have all the feels, you have perspective. I want to make sure you learn what I’m sharing and apply it. (Is this Heidi trying to control her listeners?) You probably finish this episode and think you’ve got this. In 6 months you’re going to think back and realize what I really meant. Now I get it. I totally get it now. I want you to be grounded and confident that what you’ve learned here will unfold exactly how it should unfold for you. I want to send you off with 3 ideas. How, how, how, how. How do we make it better? Remember that you are the main character in your own life. Write this down. (again, with the control) You are the main character in your life. We spend too much time doubting ourselves. I know I do. Remember you’re the main character in your life.(yes, she really says it 3x) At 2 years old you were told to stay in line, be quiet, watch your words, don't make anyone uncomfortable. We were trained to make people happy. We think we need to be good to get loved. We must expand our best parts. (That explains her booty workouts) I want this moment to be a hard reset moment in your life. (STOP TRYING TO CONTROL ME, HEIDI!) You can now begin to engage in a different way, beginning today. Don’t watch from the sidelines. Show up for your life. Imagine a movie of your life. As the title credits go by and it fades, everything that happened before that fades away. After that moment, you decide who to become. The movie is about you and your development as a person. Now, let’s recap. You are the main character in your own life. (That 4x now) No longer will you do what other people want you to do. No longer is it about who you need to be to make someone happy. That was before. Now it’s about what makes you happy. (I thought this was about surrendering?) What will create the best life for you? What will help you achieve your highest self? You are the main character of your own life. (FIVE TIMES!!!) You are worthy. I’m going to say it again. You are worthy. Carl Jung once said, “I am not what has happened to me.” Oooooo, actually, he said, “I am what I choose to become.” I might have this quote wrong. “I'm not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.” We’ve covered a lot of new ideas in the last 2 episodes and you probably have a lot of new things you want to do and implement into your life. Don’t forget, you’re worthy. Your past doesn’t define you. You are a beautiful soul. You’re right where you are supposed to be. You are a divine creature. Like you, I’m just figuring things out like everybody else. You are worthy. Do you understand me? I’m saying this to you and to myself. You are worthy of love. Being you is enough. You are worthy. Now, write this on a post-it, I made a tshirt out of it. “The universe has your address.” There’s a great quote, “Most things are out of our control.” It’s not your job to make waves, it’s to ride the waves. Don’t try to tell other surfers how to ride their waves (Literally what she’s doing) Ride your own waves. You’re probably super optimistic and excited and empowered after listening to me today. You’re feeling all the feels. I am, too. Part of you is also like, holy crap, how do I remember all of this? When I’m inspired, I have mixed feelings. I’m downloading a lot of things that will change my life. You have mixed feelings. You’re optimistic and you’re hearing me, and you’re like, I can do something about it. You listen to me and you get great tools. My guests give you great tools. How do you remember them all? How do you go back to daily life after being inspired? (She thinks she’s so inspiring to me that I can’t even function after listening to her?) I’m a humongous believer that you are going to get from each interaction with me exactly what you are meant to get. This is where faith and trust come in. Trust that the universe has your address. God is there for you. He’ll help you get out of this what you’re meant to get out of it. Stop resisting. Not everything’s a fight. Where are you resisting? Are you resisting giving that love to that person? Carl Jung said, “What we resist persists.” Paulo Coelho said, “When a person really desires something, all the universe conspires to help that person to realize her dream.” I want you to hear that again. “When you really desire something, all of the universe conspires to help her realize her dream.” The more you control, you’re getting in the way of God helping you make your dreams a reality. Get 3 post-it notes and put these things on your mirror. I have a long way to go, guys. I do. I have a lot of things I need to stop trying to control. It's increasingly harder (Shouldn’t her tips here make it easier?) What my kids are going to be after they leave my house is a real struggle for me. I experienced as a kid myself a parent who loved me so much they controlled everything I did. It was control over me in an effort to love me. To make sure I didn’t fall. That way of helping is like going to the gym and someone says, “Lets build you up to lifting a 400 lb bench press.” That person is my spotter. If they keep lifting half of my load, so I don’t get hurt, then I think I can lift 400 lbs. So when I go to the gym to lift 400 lbs without a spotter, the barbell crushes us. I’m struggling to let go with my kids to do things on their own. It’s not my job to always pick them up. It’s not my job to create waves for my kids, but to love them on whichever waves they choose to ride. My job is to let go and trust that the universe and God have my address. I didn’t get where I am today without my struggles. I’m proud of who I am. My invitation to you is to go through your week and watch for how the universe will line up to make things happen for you. Be prepared to be amazed at how much peace and joy you feel. You can only control you. Let me say that again, You can only control you. You can’t control the situation. Remember my 3 ideas: 1. You are the main character in your story (SIX TIMES!!!!!) 2. You are worthy. 3. The universe and God have your address. Next week she’ll have a really great guest for us. |
2024.05.13 21:19 doesitmatter_no The Endo Survival Guide
Several people have approached me that they might have endometriosis. Lifelong warrior so thought I would share my tips and tricks I put together for my friends and family to share with you :) Hope this helps someone!
ENDOMETRIOSIS SURGERY FACTS
PRE-SURGERY
This is dependent on the type of surgery you are having, but its good to have Gatorade, Magnesium Citrate (liquid), laxatives and enemas on hand just in case you need these.
ON SURGERY DAY
It’s important to follow the instructions on what to stop taking and/or eating/drinking prior to the surgery. Wear comfy clothes (wide elastic waistband) and slides with cozy socks. Double check your to go bag and breath.
AT THE HOSPITAL
Here’s the tips and tricks I found helpful for maintaining my pain and symptoms (GI and back pain related):
submitted by doesitmatter_no to endometriosis [link] [comments]
ENDOMETRIOSIS SURGERY FACTS
- EXCISION SURGERY! I cannot stress this one enough. If you have an ablation, it will grow back and likely quick (but consult with your doctors on your case 100%). Excision is when they cut it out vs. it gets burned off. You will have a better success rate and slow rate of growth if they excise. Not all cases can be depending on location so again, please talk with your doctor about your situation. This is not the same for everyone.
- If your doctor cannot do excision surgery. Skip and move on to the next! Trust me, well worth the time to research and find the right doctor. You will thank me later for this one too haha.
- Finding a doctor is stuff. Also tough to find resources. If you cannot find an Endometriosis specialist in your area who does excision, you may need to look out of state, but one tip is exploring gynecological oncologists. Some will take benign cases, but not all so do your research. But it’s a good avenue for help in your area or you want insurance coverage.
- Nanny’s Nook is a good resource for online information regarding endometriosis: https://nancysnookendo.com/
- Dr Seckin’s book called The Doctor Will See You Now is also worth the read (https://www.amazon.com/Doctor-Will-See-You-Endometriosis/dp/1681621126)
- Definitely look into Egg Freezing before doing any permanent surgeries. The ovaries are more intact when there is a uterus in place, so I recommend immediately following any excisions with Egg Freezing if you can and if it’s part of your plans. I found my AMH levels low (1.2) but still retrieved 25 eggs, so never be discouraged if this is your future planning path.
- My Symptoms: I experience bloating, constipation, diarrhea, nausea and vomiting as the main culprits. I have irregular periods in regards to the number of days and if it comes or not (even with an IUD). Pelvic pain is probably the worst of all since it accompanies these symptoms and is present a majority of the time. Others may have different symptoms, and there’s many others I didn’t list but wanted to paint the picture of some I’ve experienced.
PRE-SURGERY
- List of questions to ask your doctor
- Insurance Information and ID
- Necessary forms or paperwork the doctor requires
- Make sure any medical records are sent that would be relevant
- Eat smaller meals and simple foods days beforehand. If bowel prep is necessary, they also recommend taking a laxative in the days leading up to help prep.
- Pack a bag! Not every surgery is an overnight stay but even if you have a day-of surgery, back an overnight bag. Here’s the essentials:
- Phone/Headphones/iPad/Kindle/Books
- Device Chargers
- Medications that you currently take
- Glasses (do not wear contacts day of)
- An extra pair of underwear
- Sanitary Pads or Always Discreet
- Comfy pants with light elastic band around the waist
- Non wired bra
- Slip on shoes (this is clutch! Recommend slides -https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0BL7LJKZW/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1).
- Layers - Sweatshirt, Long Sleeved Shirt etc. - Hospitals are cold!
- Toothbrush and tooth paste
- Hairbrush
- Face wipes, wash cloth, small towel and bar of soap.
- Make sure your bed or couch is prepped. I stayed on the first level for the first 2ish days before feeling well enough to stay upstairs.
- I used a pregnancy pillow on the bed to help me stay on my back while sleeping and help you feel cozy.
- Stock the house with foods that will be light for your stomach. Think soups and casseroles! Saltine crackers, broths, rices etc..
- If you have a raised bed, get a step stool to assist. It’s best to sit on the side of the bed and slowly lay your upper body down while bringing your knees up and over to your back. You will need to use arm strength the first couple of days to get you up and over since you can’t use the abdomen.
- Water and Beverages stocked at all times. I have a reusable water bottle and avoid carbonated beverages for the time being. They fill you with gas for the procedure so it may make those symptoms worse.
- Netflix, Kindle, Puzzles, Craft Projects…visits with friends. Whatever makes the time pass, set it up ahead of time so it’s handy.
- Items to Keep on Hand: Baby Wipes, heating pads, pads/diapers, candles, essential oils, things that smell good haha
This is dependent on the type of surgery you are having, but its good to have Gatorade, Magnesium Citrate (liquid), laxatives and enemas on hand just in case you need these.
ON SURGERY DAY
It’s important to follow the instructions on what to stop taking and/or eating/drinking prior to the surgery. Wear comfy clothes (wide elastic waistband) and slides with cozy socks. Double check your to go bag and breath.
AT THE HOSPITAL
- Do your check-ins and keep your people with you as long as you want.
- Make sure to read all the consent forms and ask any questions upfront. Make any advance directives clear.
- Just try to remain calm as there’s a lot of down time while they do intake. It is about 2 hours of prep before they bring you in for the surgery itself.
- They will ask you the same questions over and over again, that’s normal and trust me, you want to confirm it’s all being done properly.
- If you need something for anxiety, they will be sure to give you something if you ask :)
- You will be wearing a gown, socks, funky underwear and a cool hair net haha wear the gown backward so you keep warm and keep the butt covered.
- Vitals will happen and the anesthesiologist will come and speak with you to make sure they prep the right meds beforehand. Bring up any concerns here with them!
- You may be wheeled or walked into surgery. I’ve only ever walked in and laid on the table myself.
- They will then put the IV in your arm and sometimes will put on a mask, they will then ask you to count backwards and before you know it, you will be awake again!
- You will wake-up and feel groggy. Totally normal and you will be in a different room. They will likely say a lot really quick about your surgery. Before leaving ask for them to walk through it or see if you can speak with the doctor again when clear headed. RECOMMENDED!
- Your throat will be sore, that’s normal from the tube.
- Just relax and sleep it off if you want, the goal is to be relaxed and pee once before leaving.
- Before you go, eat and drink and pass smoke urine. They’ll provide you with the meds and you’ll be good to go.
- Make sure someone brings you home after :)
- Make sure you have a bag for vomit in the car.
- Bring a small pillow that can be strapped between the car belt and you for maximum comfort on the trip home.
- Pain Med Management: This one is important. I messed up night one and didn’t take it soon enough and was in too much pain so make sure you stick to the schedule the doctors give you to ensure you are comfortable.
- Keep Walking: It seems unnatural to have a surgery then walk, but the sooner you get up and keep moving around the house, the better. Just avoid heavy lifting and immense bending like movements. Stairs are also ok but also consult with your doctor!
- Gas Build Up: I did feel pain in my shoulders from the gas. Just keep moving! It will help get that out of the system but this pain is normal.
- Relax and let people take care of you! Don’t be too quick to recover.
- Keep an eye out for fever, increased vaginal bleeding, or feeling terrible.
- Keep all post op appointments and follow all post op instructions!
Here’s the tips and tricks I found helpful for maintaining my pain and symptoms (GI and back pain related):
- Pelvic Floor Therapy: This is important for keeping the muscles in your pelvis healthy and strong to maintain your structure and also help manage pain. Consult with your doctor on whether this is right for you.
- Physical Therapy: I do PT for my back and pelvic floor since it’s all related. We focus on Myofascial Release Therapy to help break up the adhesions and give me more mobility. This helps with temporary pain relief (reduction in number), but that is always welcome :)
- Acupuncture: I swear by Acupuncture. I don’t know what it does or why, but it works. It’s not a cure by any means, but it's great for relaxation, fertility, digestion, endometriosis, sleep, etc.. I can go on, but it’s not covered by insurance plans all the time so you will need to check and see what you’re able to take on.
- Diet/Exercise:
- Eating high protein, lower fat/carbs (not none just low) helps your body, but overall learn your trigger foods! This will go a long way.
- Ginger, turmeric and fennel all help with bloating. I like to drink them in tea form when I’m feeling particularly hard stomached as it’s a good natural way to decrease the bloat. Peppermint also works for some, for me it irritates my GERD.
- Chamomile for relaxation
- Walking and movement are important. I cannot do anything high impact due to my sacroiliitis diagnosis, so I stick with light yoga and walking.
- Alcohol/Other Substances: Don’t do it. Don’t touch it. You’ll thank me later on this point.
- Sleep: Insomnia is a very real thing. I think I went 2 or 3 days at its worst one time and I cannot say enough how important trying to keep the same sleep schedule will benefit you. Waking and sleeping around the same time each day will still feel exhausting but at least you know your body is getting the most sleep it can get.
- Medications/Supplements:
- Ibprofuern: This does NOT work for me. I have GERD and ulcers so I cannot take NSAIDs, but with that in mind, NSAIDs are supposedly the best pain medication over the counter to help you manage it.
- Pain Killers: These are AS NEEDED. I try to refrain and leave these for the TRULY bad days which I try to spread out. Not even worth it sometimes, because I don’t like how I feel and sometimes vomit after taking them. But they do help the pain!
- IUD/Orilissa: An IUD will NOT do anything. If you are diagnosed, ask your doctor about Orilissa or similar medicines instead of birth control methods. This will not stop the growth, just suppress it. There are side effects and it is only a short term solution.
- Linzess: This worked well for me for constipation symptoms when they got severe. Definitely recommend bringing this to your doctor if you’re truly suffering and they have not yet mentioned. I also resorted after trying magnesium citrate
- CBD Lotions/Salves: For my pelvis, I use Healing Rose CBD Salve in Orange and Lavender (https://www.thehealingroseco.com/product/orange-lavender-with-chamomile-herbal-salve-300mg-cbd/). For my back, I use a medical grade CBD lotion with menthol (https://cbdclinic.co/clinical-strength-series/). I also use a CBD massage oil from Healing Rose of the same scent when doing myofascial release at home. I also use Somedays Cramp Cream (https://somedays.com/products/period-cramp-cream?variant=42062153842853).
- Heating Pads and Ice Pack: I have several varieties of heating pads. A cordless travel heating pad (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09FPTJL4G?psc=1&ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_product_details), a plug-in heating pad (lhttps://www.hsn.com/products/pure-enrichment-purerelief-xxl-heating-pad-with-9-cord/22188460) and stick on patches (https://www.thermacare.com/ - I use the back patches but reverse them to the front for better coverage). For hot flashes and night sweats (also if you need to relax while anxious) place an ice pack over your chest to help cool or calm down.
- Self-Care: No joke, massages, facials, epsom salt baths, sound baths, reiki….anything that you find relaxing. Do it. Try it! They also make CBD bath bombs Ive been wanting to check out.
- TENs Machine: I really want one, don’t have one, but people swear by them (the heating pad linked to MyObi has a TENs version - https://myobistore.com/en-us/collections/my-obi-belts/products/apollo-2-0).
- Pregnancy Pillow: This one sounds so lame, but I bought a pregnancy pillow for my first endometriosis surgery since I’m a side sleeper to help keep me on my back during recovery. It changed by life! It helps my anxiety and makes me comfortable while sleeping. (https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B08YYVRXLM/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1)..
- Heated Blankets/Cozy Blankets: Make yourself feel better with a cozy blanket. Do it, I dare you!
- Endo To-Go Bag: Includes heating pads (travel, plug-in and patches), medications, balms/salves, essential oils and pads/protection items, change of clothes, wet wipes.
- Sex Life: I’m single, I don’t have a partner to worry about communicating this issue with at this point, but go slow and communicate given eventually this will have to be a conversation. What I have learned is that if you do have sex and feel pain. Immediately stop! If you associate sex with pain mentally in that moment, it may cause fear in doing so down the line so it’s best to stop the moment you feel any pain occur.
- Work Life: I work a demanding job so it was not working with the appointments and care I needed to manage pain. Always get FMLA from your doctor for intermittent leave based on your company's policies. This protects you from flare-ups and appointments. Short Term Disability is based on your situation with work so talk with them about any leave of absence for surgery and recovery and ensure the medical providers fill out the paperwork appropriately.
- Friends/Family: This one is the worst. I have to cancel and make plans all the time based on how I feel. I like to line up a bunch of plans for three months out and do my best to make them happen at the beginning of the month when I know I’m most likely to feel good. I just say I’ll make things up to them when I get better and those who have stuck around have been truly amazing friends, but don’t be upset that some might be over the day in and out of what you’re going through. It’s hard for you and sometimes others and it’s just a part of the relationships we’re meant to experience in life. Most people (unless they have endometriosis) don’t understand it so it can feel isolating, but there’s others out there who know what you’re going through and are willing to chat. Just gotta find them and reach out on social media, online etc..
- Journaling Symptoms: Guilty of not being the best at this always, but it's good to track your symptoms to see how they work and operate. It helps not only you plan for it, but also your doctors in how best to handle your care. Take photos of things that make sense to show your doctors! Discharge, bowels etc..can sometimes help diagnose or judge with the images.
- Next to Bed Kit: Make sure your nightstand is stocked with the essentials for your bad days. Makes it easier to access the items you need when you just can’t get up and get it.
- Squatty Potty: Another thing that is majorly life changing on constipation days! Get one or you can make your own :) Take a stack of books and stack them at equal heights on each side and put your feet up. The trick is making sure you’re in a squat with your knees high to your ears.
- Clothing: Dressing for this is key but you still want to look cute! Joggers with a stretchy waist are my go to pants, but wide leg trousers with a stretchy waist help with ease of removal but also comfort and brings some style to the look.
- Pads: I wear Always Discreet vs. pads. I find when you need to wear them full time for incontinence it just makes it more comfortable. They have different cuts and styles so definitely check them out!
2024.05.13 21:18 doesitmatter_no The Endo Survival Guide
Several people have approached me that they might have endometriosis. Lifelong warrior so thought I would share my tips and tricks I put together for my friends and family to share with you :) Hope this helps someone!
ENDOMETRIOSIS SURGERY FACTS
PRE-SURGERY
This is dependent on the type of surgery you are having, but its good to have Gatorade, Magnesium Citrate (liquid), laxatives and enemas on hand just in case you need these.
ON SURGERY DAY
It’s important to follow the instructions on what to stop taking and/or eating/drinking prior to the surgery. Wear comfy clothes (wide elastic waistband) and slides with cozy socks. Double check your to go bag and breath.
AT THE HOSPITAL
Here’s the tips and tricks I found helpful for maintaining my pain and symptoms (GI and back pain related):
submitted by doesitmatter_no to Endo [link] [comments]
ENDOMETRIOSIS SURGERY FACTS
- EXCISION SURGERY! I cannot stress this one enough. If you have an ablation, it will grow back and likely quick (but consult with your doctors on your case 100%). Excision is when they cut it out vs. it gets burned off. You will have a better success rate and slow rate of growth if they excise. Not all cases can be depending on location so again, please talk with your doctor about your situation. This is not the same for everyone.
- If your doctor cannot do excision surgery. Skip and move on to the next! Trust me, well worth the time to research and find the right doctor. You will thank me later for this one too haha.
- Finding a doctor is stuff. Also tough to find resources. If you cannot find an Endometriosis specialist in your area who does excision, you may need to look out of state, but one tip is exploring gynecological oncologists. Some will take benign cases, but not all so do your research. But it’s a good avenue for help in your area or you want insurance coverage.
- Nanny’s Nook is a good resource for online information regarding endometriosis: https://nancysnookendo.com/
- Dr Seckin’s book called The Doctor Will See You Now is also worth the read (https://www.amazon.com/Doctor-Will-See-You-Endometriosis/dp/1681621126)
- Definitely look into Egg Freezing before doing any permanent surgeries. The ovaries are more intact when there is a uterus in place, so I recommend immediately following any excisions with Egg Freezing if you can and if it’s part of your plans. I found my AMH levels low (1.2) but still retrieved 25 eggs, so never be discouraged if this is your future planning path.
- My Symptoms: I experience bloating, constipation, diarrhea, nausea and vomiting as the main culprits. I have irregular periods in regards to the number of days and if it comes or not (even with an IUD). Pelvic pain is probably the worst of all since it accompanies these symptoms and is present a majority of the time. Others may have different symptoms, and there’s many others I didn’t list but wanted to paint the picture of some I’ve experienced.
PRE-SURGERY
- List of questions to ask your doctor
- Insurance Information and ID
- Necessary forms or paperwork the doctor requires
- Make sure any medical records are sent that would be relevant
- Eat smaller meals and simple foods days beforehand. If bowel prep is necessary, they also recommend taking a laxative in the days leading up to help prep.
- Pack a bag! Not every surgery is an overnight stay but even if you have a day-of surgery, back an overnight bag. Here’s the essentials:
- Phone/Headphones/iPad/Kindle/Books
- Device Chargers
- Medications that you currently take
- Glasses (do not wear contacts day of)
- An extra pair of underwear
- Sanitary Pads or Always Discreet
- Comfy pants with light elastic band around the waist
- Non wired bra
- Slip on shoes (this is clutch! Recommend slides -https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0BL7LJKZW/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1).
- Layers - Sweatshirt, Long Sleeved Shirt etc. - Hospitals are cold!
- Toothbrush and tooth paste
- Hairbrush
- Face wipes, wash cloth, small towel and bar of soap.
- Make sure your bed or couch is prepped. I stayed on the first level for the first 2ish days before feeling well enough to stay upstairs.
- I used a pregnancy pillow on the bed to help me stay on my back while sleeping and help you feel cozy.
- Stock the house with foods that will be light for your stomach. Think soups and casseroles! Saltine crackers, broths, rices etc..
- If you have a raised bed, get a step stool to assist. It’s best to sit on the side of the bed and slowly lay your upper body down while bringing your knees up and over to your back. You will need to use arm strength the first couple of days to get you up and over since you can’t use the abdomen.
- Water and Beverages stocked at all times. I have a reusable water bottle and avoid carbonated beverages for the time being. They fill you with gas for the procedure so it may make those symptoms worse.
- Netflix, Kindle, Puzzles, Craft Projects…visits with friends. Whatever makes the time pass, set it up ahead of time so it’s handy.
- Items to Keep on Hand: Baby Wipes, heating pads, pads/diapers, candles, essential oils, things that smell good haha
This is dependent on the type of surgery you are having, but its good to have Gatorade, Magnesium Citrate (liquid), laxatives and enemas on hand just in case you need these.
ON SURGERY DAY
It’s important to follow the instructions on what to stop taking and/or eating/drinking prior to the surgery. Wear comfy clothes (wide elastic waistband) and slides with cozy socks. Double check your to go bag and breath.
AT THE HOSPITAL
- Do your check-ins and keep your people with you as long as you want.
- Make sure to read all the consent forms and ask any questions upfront. Make any advance directives clear.
- Just try to remain calm as there’s a lot of down time while they do intake. It is about 2 hours of prep before they bring you in for the surgery itself.
- They will ask you the same questions over and over again, that’s normal and trust me, you want to confirm it’s all being done properly.
- If you need something for anxiety, they will be sure to give you something if you ask :)
- You will be wearing a gown, socks, funky underwear and a cool hair net haha wear the gown backward so you keep warm and keep the butt covered.
- Vitals will happen and the anesthesiologist will come and speak with you to make sure they prep the right meds beforehand. Bring up any concerns here with them!
- You may be wheeled or walked into surgery. I’ve only ever walked in and laid on the table myself.
- They will then put the IV in your arm and sometimes will put on a mask, they will then ask you to count backwards and before you know it, you will be awake again!
- You will wake-up and feel groggy. Totally normal and you will be in a different room. They will likely say a lot really quick about your surgery. Before leaving ask for them to walk through it or see if you can speak with the doctor again when clear headed. RECOMMENDED!
- Your throat will be sore, that’s normal from the tube.
- Just relax and sleep it off if you want, the goal is to be relaxed and pee once before leaving.
- Before you go, eat and drink and pass smoke urine. They’ll provide you with the meds and you’ll be good to go.
- Make sure someone brings you home after :)
- Make sure you have a bag for vomit in the car.
- Bring a small pillow that can be strapped between the car belt and you for maximum comfort on the trip home.
- Pain Med Management: This one is important. I messed up night one and didn’t take it soon enough and was in too much pain so make sure you stick to the schedule the doctors give you to ensure you are comfortable.
- Keep Walking: It seems unnatural to have a surgery then walk, but the sooner you get up and keep moving around the house, the better. Just avoid heavy lifting and immense bending like movements. Stairs are also ok but also consult with your doctor!
- Gas Build Up: I did feel pain in my shoulders from the gas. Just keep moving! It will help get that out of the system but this pain is normal.
- Relax and let people take care of you! Don’t be too quick to recover.
- Keep an eye out for fever, increased vaginal bleeding, or feeling terrible.
- Keep all post op appointments and follow all post op instructions!
Here’s the tips and tricks I found helpful for maintaining my pain and symptoms (GI and back pain related):
- Pelvic Floor Therapy: This is important for keeping the muscles in your pelvis healthy and strong to maintain your structure and also help manage pain. Consult with your doctor on whether this is right for you.
- Physical Therapy: I do PT for my back and pelvic floor since it’s all related. We focus on Myofascial Release Therapy to help break up the adhesions and give me more mobility. This helps with temporary pain relief (reduction in number), but that is always welcome :)
- Acupuncture: I swear by Acupuncture. I don’t know what it does or why, but it works. It’s not a cure by any means, but it's great for relaxation, fertility, digestion, endometriosis, sleep, etc.. I can go on, but it’s not covered by insurance plans all the time so you will need to check and see what you’re able to take on.
- Diet/Exercise:
- Eating high protein, lower fat/carbs (not none just low) helps your body, but overall learn your trigger foods! This will go a long way.
- Ginger, turmeric and fennel all help with bloating. I like to drink them in tea form when I’m feeling particularly hard stomached as it’s a good natural way to decrease the bloat. Peppermint also works for some, for me it irritates my GERD.
- Chamomile for relaxation
- Walking and movement are important. I cannot do anything high impact due to my sacroiliitis diagnosis, so I stick with light yoga and walking.
- Alcohol/Other Substances: Don’t do it. Don’t touch it. You’ll thank me later on this point.
- Sleep: Insomnia is a very real thing. I think I went 2 or 3 days at its worst one time and I cannot say enough how important trying to keep the same sleep schedule will benefit you. Waking and sleeping around the same time each day will still feel exhausting but at least you know your body is getting the most sleep it can get.
- Medications/Supplements:
- Ibprofuern: This does NOT work for me. I have GERD and ulcers so I cannot take NSAIDs, but with that in mind, NSAIDs are supposedly the best pain medication over the counter to help you manage it.
- Pain Killers: These are AS NEEDED. I try to refrain and leave these for the TRULY bad days which I try to spread out. Not even worth it sometimes, because I don’t like how I feel and sometimes vomit after taking them. But they do help the pain!
- IUD/Orilissa: An IUD will NOT do anything. If you are diagnosed, ask your doctor about Orilissa or similar medicines instead of birth control methods. This will not stop the growth, just suppress it. There are side effects and it is only a short term solution.
- Linzess: This worked well for me for constipation symptoms when they got severe. Definitely recommend bringing this to your doctor if you’re truly suffering and they have not yet mentioned. I also resorted after trying magnesium citrate
- CBD Lotions/Salves: For my pelvis, I use Healing Rose CBD Salve in Orange and Lavender (https://www.thehealingroseco.com/product/orange-lavender-with-chamomile-herbal-salve-300mg-cbd/). For my back, I use a medical grade CBD lotion with menthol (https://cbdclinic.co/clinical-strength-series/). I also use a CBD massage oil from Healing Rose of the same scent when doing myofascial release at home. I also use Somedays Cramp Cream (https://somedays.com/products/period-cramp-cream?variant=42062153842853).
- Heating Pads and Ice Pack: I have several varieties of heating pads. A cordless travel heating pad (https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09FPTJL4G?psc=1&ref=ppx_yo2ov_dt_b_product_details), a plug-in heating pad (lhttps://www.hsn.com/products/pure-enrichment-purerelief-xxl-heating-pad-with-9-cord/22188460) and stick on patches (https://www.thermacare.com/ - I use the back patches but reverse them to the front for better coverage). For hot flashes and night sweats (also if you need to relax while anxious) place an ice pack over your chest to help cool or calm down.
- Self-Care: No joke, massages, facials, epsom salt baths, sound baths, reiki….anything that you find relaxing. Do it. Try it! They also make CBD bath bombs Ive been wanting to check out.
- TENs Machine: I really want one, don’t have one, but people swear by them (the heating pad linked to MyObi has a TENs version - https://myobistore.com/en-us/collections/my-obi-belts/products/apollo-2-0).
- Pregnancy Pillow: This one sounds so lame, but I bought a pregnancy pillow for my first endometriosis surgery since I’m a side sleeper to help keep me on my back during recovery. It changed by life! It helps my anxiety and makes me comfortable while sleeping. (https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B08YYVRXLM/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1)..
- Heated Blankets/Cozy Blankets: Make yourself feel better with a cozy blanket. Do it, I dare you!
- Endo To-Go Bag: Includes heating pads (travel, plug-in and patches), medications, balms/salves, essential oils and pads/protection items, change of clothes, wet wipes.
- Sex Life: I’m single, I don’t have a partner to worry about communicating this issue with at this point, but go slow and communicate given eventually this will have to be a conversation. What I have learned is that if you do have sex and feel pain. Immediately stop! If you associate sex with pain mentally in that moment, it may cause fear in doing so down the line so it’s best to stop the moment you feel any pain occur.
- Work Life: I work a demanding job so it was not working with the appointments and care I needed to manage pain. Always get FMLA from your doctor for intermittent leave based on your company's policies. This protects you from flare-ups and appointments. Short Term Disability is based on your situation with work so talk with them about any leave of absence for surgery and recovery and ensure the medical providers fill out the paperwork appropriately.
- Friends/Family: This one is the worst. I have to cancel and make plans all the time based on how I feel. I like to line up a bunch of plans for three months out and do my best to make them happen at the beginning of the month when I know I’m most likely to feel good. I just say I’ll make things up to them when I get better and those who have stuck around have been truly amazing friends, but don’t be upset that some might be over the day in and out of what you’re going through. It’s hard for you and sometimes others and it’s just a part of the relationships we’re meant to experience in life. Most people (unless they have endometriosis) don’t understand it so it can feel isolating, but there’s others out there who know what you’re going through and are willing to chat. Just gotta find them and reach out on social media, online etc..
- Journaling Symptoms: Guilty of not being the best at this always, but it's good to track your symptoms to see how they work and operate. It helps not only you plan for it, but also your doctors in how best to handle your care. Take photos of things that make sense to show your doctors! Discharge, bowels etc..can sometimes help diagnose or judge with the images.
- Next to Bed Kit: Make sure your nightstand is stocked with the essentials for your bad days. Makes it easier to access the items you need when you just can’t get up and get it.
- Squatty Potty: Another thing that is majorly life changing on constipation days! Get one or you can make your own :) Take a stack of books and stack them at equal heights on each side and put your feet up. The trick is making sure you’re in a squat with your knees high to your ears.
- Clothing: Dressing for this is key but you still want to look cute! Joggers with a stretchy waist are my go to pants, but wide leg trousers with a stretchy waist help with ease of removal but also comfort and brings some style to the look.
- Pads: I wear Always Discreet vs. pads. I find when you need to wear them full time for incontinence it just makes it more comfortable. They have different cuts and styles so definitely check them out!
2024.05.13 21:06 No_Cartographer7815 Dumbledore was right to try to keep Sirius in Grimmauld Place
Dumbledore gets a lot of flak for keeping Sirius "locked up", both from fans and from Harry, but looking back on Sirius' history, I'd have to say that Dumbledore was right to do so. Let's have a look at Sirius' track record.
submitted by No_Cartographer7815 to harrypotter [link] [comments]
- In the beginning of Prisoner of Azkaban, Sirius goes to Little Whinging to see Harry after his escape. He sneaks up on Harry at Magnolia Crescent, and almost immediately Harry senses him and draws his wand.
- Sirius then tries to break into Gryffindor Tower, and almost immediately alerts the whole school to his presence by attacking a painting.
- During Gryffindor's quidditch game against Hufflepuff, Sirius goes to watch Harry. He goes right into the stands, and Harry sees him yet again.
- After stealing the passwords to Gryffindor tower, he goes straight into the third year boys' dorm and wakes them all up by standing over Ron with a knife in his hand.
- Later on in PoA, Harry sees with Crookshanks him by just looking out of the Hogwarts window.
- Towards the end of the book he goes to get Wormtail off Ron, and ends up dragging Ron with him and being chased by Harry and Hermione. Then Lupin and Snape both get dragged into it.
- During Goblet of Fire he goes to talk to Harry through the fireplace and yet again they are seconds away from being caught. To be fair it was Ron who wouldn't have turned him in, but it could have been anyone.
- In the beginning of Order of the Phoenix, he accompanies Harry and the others to King's Cross, and is seen by one of the main Death Eaters (Lucius).
- Then he is again seconds away from being caught in the Gryffindor fireplace, by Umbridge this time.
2024.05.13 21:02 Shafirion Build for some semi retirement fun in standard
Hey gus,
Sanctum was the last league I played. Ever since I became a dad playing league is essentially out of the question. However, occasionally that PoE itch has to be scratched a little. I spent the last weeks liquidating my assets in standard, played around with some build ideas and settled on a SST champion. (I do follow builds for recent leagues on youtube and the crazyness of crucible for Emperor's Vigilance was something I really wanted to try). The build is insanely well rounded and really strongt. However, somehow SST just isn't for me. Now, I am looking to sink my currency into one build to have some fun occasionally and I am pondering what to go for. The budget would be close to 1500 divines if I manage to sell everything I have lying around.
Build should be
I am considering BV (have never played it but always wanted to try it), Power Siphon (looks really cool, but would consider giving it my own sping with a phys wand with explodey implicit and cold conversion just for the feel) or TS (I was considering to dump almost everything into Loath Thunder just to own it and take it from take it from there; also Mathil has a cool TS tri stack Inqisitor that looks really cool to me).
Really appreciate all suggestions.
submitted by Shafirion to PathOfExileBuilds [link] [comments]
Sanctum was the last league I played. Ever since I became a dad playing league is essentially out of the question. However, occasionally that PoE itch has to be scratched a little. I spent the last weeks liquidating my assets in standard, played around with some build ideas and settled on a SST champion. (I do follow builds for recent leagues on youtube and the crazyness of crucible for Emperor's Vigilance was something I really wanted to try). The build is insanely well rounded and really strongt. However, somehow SST just isn't for me. Now, I am looking to sink my currency into one build to have some fun occasionally and I am pondering what to go for. The budget would be close to 1500 divines if I manage to sell everything I have lying around.
Build should be
- fast, a little zoomy even
- tanky (doesn't need to be insanely tanky, but squishy builds really annoy me)
- should be good for sanctum (best league mechanic ever imo and probably what I'll end up doing most of my time in standard)
- somewhat allround
I am considering BV (have never played it but always wanted to try it), Power Siphon (looks really cool, but would consider giving it my own sping with a phys wand with explodey implicit and cold conversion just for the feel) or TS (I was considering to dump almost everything into Loath Thunder just to own it and take it from take it from there; also Mathil has a cool TS tri stack Inqisitor that looks really cool to me).
Really appreciate all suggestions.
2024.05.13 20:14 acidwxrld i let someone lead me on :,)
as the title says, i feel like i was lead on. at the same time tho i feel like it was partially my fault. there were many red flags.
as a gay dude dating lowkey sucks. all i want is to fall in love and have a happy future w someone. i was on grindr one night (not the place to be when relationship oriented) and a torso profile texted me. he immediately shared his face and nudes. i was a little standoffish at first because iv had bad experiences with military men but then we got to talking and made it to imessage. when he was texting me it seemed more like he was looking for a relationship. but in reality everything he was talking about was sexual while i was trying to do normal conversation. we contined talking and he was telling me about all these men and women hed been with (including underaged ones). he was going into detail and it was making me lowkey uncomfy but i just ignored it because he was really hot and i guess i saw something with this man. anyways, i basically just ghosted him for a while but then he started texting me acting like he was really serious (let me take u out to dinner, i wanna talk to u, etc). i went along w it and started feeling almost attached. i went through his following and there were a few boys who were way more attractive than me so i went with the ghosting after that. he would send me things like “why wont u talk to me :(“ or “i miss u”. i found out recently hes been fucking 2 of my friends simultaneously. no hate to my friends tho i never told them about him and its only from him and them being on grindr 24/7. hes a manipulative asshole and it was obvious from the beginning.
submitted by acidwxrld to dating [link] [comments]
as a gay dude dating lowkey sucks. all i want is to fall in love and have a happy future w someone. i was on grindr one night (not the place to be when relationship oriented) and a torso profile texted me. he immediately shared his face and nudes. i was a little standoffish at first because iv had bad experiences with military men but then we got to talking and made it to imessage. when he was texting me it seemed more like he was looking for a relationship. but in reality everything he was talking about was sexual while i was trying to do normal conversation. we contined talking and he was telling me about all these men and women hed been with (including underaged ones). he was going into detail and it was making me lowkey uncomfy but i just ignored it because he was really hot and i guess i saw something with this man. anyways, i basically just ghosted him for a while but then he started texting me acting like he was really serious (let me take u out to dinner, i wanna talk to u, etc). i went along w it and started feeling almost attached. i went through his following and there were a few boys who were way more attractive than me so i went with the ghosting after that. he would send me things like “why wont u talk to me :(“ or “i miss u”. i found out recently hes been fucking 2 of my friends simultaneously. no hate to my friends tho i never told them about him and its only from him and them being on grindr 24/7. hes a manipulative asshole and it was obvious from the beginning.
2024.05.13 19:44 TheNickelGuy LF Some Shiny Mythicals, Shiny PoGo Mew, Shiny Home Stamp Zeroara, and some Unova and Galar SHINY Pokemon That Can't Transfer to SV FT: Random Assortment of Shinies, Legends, Events and Some Genned Mons
 | Heyyo, just looking for a few things today. Everything in Pic #4 and #5 is genned. submitted by TheNickelGuy to PokemonHome [link] [comments] Clones are fine, not interested in genned Pokemon. Please attach pictures of the pokemon you are offering showing IVs, Stamp and caught date For the shiny BDSP Shaymin and Phione, I would do 2:1 (and possibly 3:1) for them.For the shiny PoGo Mew and Home Stamped Zeroara, I'll do 25:1 or possibly even more (MUST HAVE CURRENT STAMP AND ORIGIN MARK)Shiny MythicalsPoGo Shiny Mew Home Stamped Shiny Zeroara BDSP Shiny Shaymin BDSP Shiny Phione WILL TRADE 2 GENNED MONS PER SHINY BELOW AS WELLPOKEMON THAT CANT TRANSFER TO SVALL NEED TO BE SHINY PLEASEUNOVAVanillite Yamask (regular) Dwebble Tympole Karrablast Klang Elgyem Beeheyem Pancham Amaura Emolga Frillish (Male and Female) GALAR Blipbug Wooloo Clobbopus |
2024.05.13 18:29 throwaway0000000pp I (20 F) met a guy (20 M) on bumble and he's pushing boundaries, how should i go about enforcing my boundaries and how should I confront him if he keeps doing it?
A guy iv met on bumble has started being kind of pushy about my boundaries. He asks alot of questions like "when do you think we're going to like hold hands" or "I feel like you feel this way or that way" and he asks alot of stuff like if I think I'll hug him or hold hands when I see him. He also has spoken alot about sexual stuff like his fetishes and has asked how we would go about doing it if we wanted to have sex(like the where). I haven't met him in person and we've only had a few calls so it just seems a bit to early. I sent him a message asking if things could go slower and he seemed to understand but then he went back to asking stuff about how far we are into the relationship and some sexual stuff. What annoys me the most is him saying "oh I feel like you feel this way about me" or "oh I feel like your like shy but might open up to me" as if he knows how my mind works. Its really kind of weird but I'm not sure how to go about this. I'm not really sure what to do or if maybe I'm just overreacting. I don't know, it kinda makes me feel weird and he does it alot in conversation. I just feel like he's ignoring what I said about not wanting to go to fast. He says alot of stuff like "if I were to have sex with you" and it makes me uncomfortable that he's already thinking about that when we haven't even met in person yet. For sure I just want to figure out if this is a red flag or not, I haven't really dated alot so I'm new to it. I guess my question is what would be the best way to go about enforcing my boundaries and how do i confront him if he continues to push them? TLDR: guy on bumble is pushing my boundaries, how do I go about enforcing them?
submitted by throwaway0000000pp to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2024.05.13 16:55 space_farmer_luke The Yaire exile to earth chapter-7
The Yaire exile to earth chapter-7
3rd mate Mic Yese
We had just gotten out of the animal transport trailer, and were all stretching out our sore muscles from the less than comfortable trip to our host’s farm. We all had just started to soak up the sun to ease our stiff joints when the man who seemed to be our savior, motioned for me to follow him to the waiting vehicle that still held our injured and dead crewmen.
He tried to talk to me again, even though I still couldn’t understand what he was saying. He even used his hands while he was talking. That seemed to help some. I got the impression that he wanted me to escort him to where even he was taking my people.
As I stood there in the one-way conversation, Lucci touched my shoulder. As I turned to face her, she started to speak even before I could look at her directly.
“Mic, I’m the ship’s linguistic officer and Iv done nothing to try to speak with these aliens. Luccia is my sister’s daughter. I need to be with her when she passes. I owe her that.” Lucci said, choking on her words with pain and shame.
As much as I wanted to tell her no, all I could muster in a response was, “what if you don’t come back?”
She just smiled and stepped into the rear seat, there Luccia’s broken body was lying. When the alien softly shut the door I could briefly she Lucci stroking the young woman’s hair. When the vehicle and trailer pulled away, I said a silent prayer for their safety, to wherever they were heading.
While I watched the small dust cloud disappear down the gravel road, the younger of strange men waved me to the covered porch. Our small parade of men and women had already started to file into the house.
The last trooper in line stopped in-front of the clearing shocked young alien women. He gave her a short bow. His toned features and comparable young made a dramatic impression on the girls as she blushed a rosy red.
“Si, you idiot, what are you doing?” Lis scolded. As she was the next in line behind him.
“What, she’s pretty and we may have to be here for a while. It can’t hurt to be overly kind to our benefactor, will it?”
“That’s enough, you two. No one needs to be thinking with the base instinct. You got that, son?” I tried to sound as in charge as I could.
“Ok, captain, whatever you say.” Si said as he disappeared into the open door.
The woman was still blushing a little as I walked past her. Bring up the rear, I stepped inside the two store building. Its white exterior gave way to white and blue painted walls with stained wooden trim. Pictures littered the walls as ones of smiling children and a happy family gave way to children grown and the family pictures had one less person in them.
I was examining the pictures when a sudden sound nearly gave me a heart attack. The young lady was holding some sort of black remote, frantically mashing a button and slowly the sound lowered. The screen she was facing flickered with a scene of people, dressed in completely different garb than any I have seen so far.
The screen was in gray and black. It depicted a young female child, her mother and an older bearded man with a long stocking cap.
One of my other female bridge crewmen Mia asked aloud, “what do you think they’re doing?”
“I’m not sure, but we need to take advantage of this and try to glean some of their language as best we can.” I replied.
We started to seat our selves on the furniture that decorated the room where the screen was located. Ten of us seated our self on the two coaches and the few chairs that furnished the room.
Mas, one of the remaining marines, took a slow look around the open room that had a similarly open kitchen adjacent to it, both supported by a stairwell that led to the upper floor. It’s a little different from ours, but it’s not that far off from home.” He stated.
“It’s not home, so don’t even get used to it,” Cattlen, Mia’s sister, said sternly. “We’ve lost friends and family and now we’re gods only know where.” She concluded, trying to not show the small tears that were welling in the corner of her eyes.
“We’re here for as long as we have to be.” I tried to say in a calming tone. It was all a load. I know we most likely would die here. The Zeen were not known to return prisoners.
As we all sat watching the flashing scenes that unfolded in various states of gray, we all forced our mouths to form the words we heard. “Santa claws, zoo, mr. Macy and post office.” I have little idea what these words were, but we had to learn something. After my most resent attempt to say Santa claws, a tap on my shoulder broke my focus.
The young man beckoned me to a door past the first floor landing. He tried to talk to me using words like shower, towel, toilet. As I gazed into the small clean room, I couldn’t help but smile. It was a bathroom, the sink stool tub and even mirror were nearly carbon copies of our lavatories that we were familiar with.
“Bathroom,” he said slowly. “With excitement,” I said, “Bathroom!” That seemed to make the man very happy, and he turned and almost ran upstairs.
“Who wants a bath?” I asked, and both Lis and Mia jumped from their seats and all but sprinted to the bathroom. Mia narrowly made it to the door before Lis and slammed it closed in Lis’s face. Causing her to fall and land hard on her rear.
The expression of pain hadn’t left her face yet when a pale masculine hand reached out tenderly in an offer to help. Lis looked at it in surprise and then up at the man with obvious concern painted on his face. She expected his gesture and rose to her feet. He was carrying a stack of towels and clean cloths, he, set the stack down on the last step and picking up a clean towel, shirt and soft looking cloth pants walked to the next door and walked in. Lis watched in confusion as the sound of water could be heard from the space beyond the door. A few moments later, he walked out of the room now without the clothing. Slowly, she walked past him and entered the next room.
“Lis, don’t get attached.” Si jokingly shouted so she could hear him. A faint “shut up” could be heard.
The young alien male, for the first time, introduced himself. “Joshua,” he said, pointing to himself. So I replied, “Mic”, as I pointed to myself. At this, Joshua got excited and pointed to his apparent sister. “Becky” he said with an excited tone. I replied with my best attempt at Becky.
The young lady fed everyone some sort of noodle with what she called “meatballs”. Most everyone had fallen asleep on the couches with the exception of Lis and myself. Lis and Joshua were working on laundry. Apparently the ten of us used up nearly all the towels and most of the spare clothes. While Becky was finishing placing things away in the kitchen, I walked out to the front of the porch that overlooks the farm yard.
As I watched the pinks and blues, the last of the day’s light disappeared to the black emptiness of night, the vehicle I came to know as a truck and its respective trailer pulled back in the yard.
The man who stepped out of the pickup was Micheal. His son tried to fill me in the best he could during dinner, pointing out who was who in the family picture. Micheal, Joe, and child versions of himself and his sister Becky. It wasn’t until I pointed to a picture of a black-haired woman that his expression changed from happy verging on excitement to somber and quiet.
“Mom …. She died last winter.” He mumbled. Although I couldn’t be sure, I believe it was his mother that must have passed to the next life.
Micheal slowly climbed the stairs, his footsteps overlapping themselves in a worn stagger. Bracing himself against the stairwell with his right hand and holding an open glass bottle half full of brown liquid in his left. He made his assent to the top of the stairs. He staggered past me. As he did, he thumped a black box with a series of buttons on its side dead center of my chest. I reached up for it as he let go of the device. He walked a few more feet until he crumbled into a wooded bench that was being supported by rusted chains.
“Play it! Play the damn thing.” He started. I wasn’t sure if it was what he wanted, but I must have tapped the right button because Lucci’s voice began to play.
“Mic, I’m with the doctor and he thinks that all three will make a recovery. He’s not sure how long it will take, but he’s got some confidence. He told me that we weren’t the first Yaire he’s treated and that they have taught him a little of our language. Apparently, the Zeen has left others here to die. He and Joe, the older man from this morning, will bury the two young marines that didn’t make it. I’m working to help Liccia and have to go please watch over everyone.
Upon hearing this voice message, I fell onto the bench where Michael was seated.
He thrusted the bottle to me and gestured for me to take a pull from the open spout. It was hot and cold and left a choking burn in my throat as I drank it. It was some sort of alcohol similar to what I had access to for all my life but this was brown and not clear.
Taking another drink off the bottle, I pointed to myself and then to the stars, after which Micheal pointed to himself and then to the ground.
Pointing to myself again, I said “mic” And again to himself he pointed and said “Micheal”
We were both quiet for a while sharing the rot gut liquor. We started to black out on the porch bench.
“Ten years. Guess I was overdue for a relapse.” Micheal mumbled l.
The last thought before I couldn’t keep my eyes open was, I need to learn what the hell he’s saying.
This story was brought to you in large part due to u/Fit-Capital1536. A big thank you for the collaboration and story ideas.
last
submitted by space_farmer_luke to HFY [link] [comments]
3rd mate Mic Yese
We had just gotten out of the animal transport trailer, and were all stretching out our sore muscles from the less than comfortable trip to our host’s farm. We all had just started to soak up the sun to ease our stiff joints when the man who seemed to be our savior, motioned for me to follow him to the waiting vehicle that still held our injured and dead crewmen.
He tried to talk to me again, even though I still couldn’t understand what he was saying. He even used his hands while he was talking. That seemed to help some. I got the impression that he wanted me to escort him to where even he was taking my people.
As I stood there in the one-way conversation, Lucci touched my shoulder. As I turned to face her, she started to speak even before I could look at her directly.
“Mic, I’m the ship’s linguistic officer and Iv done nothing to try to speak with these aliens. Luccia is my sister’s daughter. I need to be with her when she passes. I owe her that.” Lucci said, choking on her words with pain and shame.
As much as I wanted to tell her no, all I could muster in a response was, “what if you don’t come back?”
She just smiled and stepped into the rear seat, there Luccia’s broken body was lying. When the alien softly shut the door I could briefly she Lucci stroking the young woman’s hair. When the vehicle and trailer pulled away, I said a silent prayer for their safety, to wherever they were heading.
While I watched the small dust cloud disappear down the gravel road, the younger of strange men waved me to the covered porch. Our small parade of men and women had already started to file into the house.
The last trooper in line stopped in-front of the clearing shocked young alien women. He gave her a short bow. His toned features and comparable young made a dramatic impression on the girls as she blushed a rosy red.
“Si, you idiot, what are you doing?” Lis scolded. As she was the next in line behind him.
“What, she’s pretty and we may have to be here for a while. It can’t hurt to be overly kind to our benefactor, will it?”
“That’s enough, you two. No one needs to be thinking with the base instinct. You got that, son?” I tried to sound as in charge as I could.
“Ok, captain, whatever you say.” Si said as he disappeared into the open door.
The woman was still blushing a little as I walked past her. Bring up the rear, I stepped inside the two store building. Its white exterior gave way to white and blue painted walls with stained wooden trim. Pictures littered the walls as ones of smiling children and a happy family gave way to children grown and the family pictures had one less person in them.
I was examining the pictures when a sudden sound nearly gave me a heart attack. The young lady was holding some sort of black remote, frantically mashing a button and slowly the sound lowered. The screen she was facing flickered with a scene of people, dressed in completely different garb than any I have seen so far.
The screen was in gray and black. It depicted a young female child, her mother and an older bearded man with a long stocking cap.
One of my other female bridge crewmen Mia asked aloud, “what do you think they’re doing?”
“I’m not sure, but we need to take advantage of this and try to glean some of their language as best we can.” I replied.
We started to seat our selves on the furniture that decorated the room where the screen was located. Ten of us seated our self on the two coaches and the few chairs that furnished the room.
Mas, one of the remaining marines, took a slow look around the open room that had a similarly open kitchen adjacent to it, both supported by a stairwell that led to the upper floor. It’s a little different from ours, but it’s not that far off from home.” He stated.
“It’s not home, so don’t even get used to it,” Cattlen, Mia’s sister, said sternly. “We’ve lost friends and family and now we’re gods only know where.” She concluded, trying to not show the small tears that were welling in the corner of her eyes.
“We’re here for as long as we have to be.” I tried to say in a calming tone. It was all a load. I know we most likely would die here. The Zeen were not known to return prisoners.
As we all sat watching the flashing scenes that unfolded in various states of gray, we all forced our mouths to form the words we heard. “Santa claws, zoo, mr. Macy and post office.” I have little idea what these words were, but we had to learn something. After my most resent attempt to say Santa claws, a tap on my shoulder broke my focus.
The young man beckoned me to a door past the first floor landing. He tried to talk to me using words like shower, towel, toilet. As I gazed into the small clean room, I couldn’t help but smile. It was a bathroom, the sink stool tub and even mirror were nearly carbon copies of our lavatories that we were familiar with.
“Bathroom,” he said slowly. “With excitement,” I said, “Bathroom!” That seemed to make the man very happy, and he turned and almost ran upstairs.
“Who wants a bath?” I asked, and both Lis and Mia jumped from their seats and all but sprinted to the bathroom. Mia narrowly made it to the door before Lis and slammed it closed in Lis’s face. Causing her to fall and land hard on her rear.
The expression of pain hadn’t left her face yet when a pale masculine hand reached out tenderly in an offer to help. Lis looked at it in surprise and then up at the man with obvious concern painted on his face. She expected his gesture and rose to her feet. He was carrying a stack of towels and clean cloths, he, set the stack down on the last step and picking up a clean towel, shirt and soft looking cloth pants walked to the next door and walked in. Lis watched in confusion as the sound of water could be heard from the space beyond the door. A few moments later, he walked out of the room now without the clothing. Slowly, she walked past him and entered the next room.
“Lis, don’t get attached.” Si jokingly shouted so she could hear him. A faint “shut up” could be heard.
The young alien male, for the first time, introduced himself. “Joshua,” he said, pointing to himself. So I replied, “Mic”, as I pointed to myself. At this, Joshua got excited and pointed to his apparent sister. “Becky” he said with an excited tone. I replied with my best attempt at Becky.
The young lady fed everyone some sort of noodle with what she called “meatballs”. Most everyone had fallen asleep on the couches with the exception of Lis and myself. Lis and Joshua were working on laundry. Apparently the ten of us used up nearly all the towels and most of the spare clothes. While Becky was finishing placing things away in the kitchen, I walked out to the front of the porch that overlooks the farm yard.
As I watched the pinks and blues, the last of the day’s light disappeared to the black emptiness of night, the vehicle I came to know as a truck and its respective trailer pulled back in the yard.
The man who stepped out of the pickup was Micheal. His son tried to fill me in the best he could during dinner, pointing out who was who in the family picture. Micheal, Joe, and child versions of himself and his sister Becky. It wasn’t until I pointed to a picture of a black-haired woman that his expression changed from happy verging on excitement to somber and quiet.
“Mom …. She died last winter.” He mumbled. Although I couldn’t be sure, I believe it was his mother that must have passed to the next life.
Micheal slowly climbed the stairs, his footsteps overlapping themselves in a worn stagger. Bracing himself against the stairwell with his right hand and holding an open glass bottle half full of brown liquid in his left. He made his assent to the top of the stairs. He staggered past me. As he did, he thumped a black box with a series of buttons on its side dead center of my chest. I reached up for it as he let go of the device. He walked a few more feet until he crumbled into a wooded bench that was being supported by rusted chains.
“Play it! Play the damn thing.” He started. I wasn’t sure if it was what he wanted, but I must have tapped the right button because Lucci’s voice began to play.
“Mic, I’m with the doctor and he thinks that all three will make a recovery. He’s not sure how long it will take, but he’s got some confidence. He told me that we weren’t the first Yaire he’s treated and that they have taught him a little of our language. Apparently, the Zeen has left others here to die. He and Joe, the older man from this morning, will bury the two young marines that didn’t make it. I’m working to help Liccia and have to go please watch over everyone.
Upon hearing this voice message, I fell onto the bench where Michael was seated.
He thrusted the bottle to me and gestured for me to take a pull from the open spout. It was hot and cold and left a choking burn in my throat as I drank it. It was some sort of alcohol similar to what I had access to for all my life but this was brown and not clear.
Taking another drink off the bottle, I pointed to myself and then to the stars, after which Micheal pointed to himself and then to the ground.
Pointing to myself again, I said “mic” And again to himself he pointed and said “Micheal”
We were both quiet for a while sharing the rot gut liquor. We started to black out on the porch bench.
“Ten years. Guess I was overdue for a relapse.” Micheal mumbled l.
The last thought before I couldn’t keep my eyes open was, I need to learn what the hell he’s saying.
This story was brought to you in large part due to u/Fit-Capital1536. A big thank you for the collaboration and story ideas.
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2024.05.13 15:36 Wheats9k Elevated ALT/AST
Recently went to the Dr. for a physical evaluation, they did a blood panel. My results came back as having low thyroid function (hashimotos thyroiditis) and I had an elevated ALT. They prescribed be Levothyroxine and scheduled an ultrasound on my liver, where they determined I have NAFLD. About 8 months later (now) I was experiencing a very slight dull pain on my right side abdomen (which has since gone away). I made am appointment, they did a urine test which showed no issues, and another blood panel, which came back with an ALT of 124U/L and an AST of 34U/L. They scheduled me to do an CAT scan with IV contrast and an oral contrast.
What could be my issue and how concerned should I be?
Male 32yo 6feet tall 265 lbs, non-alcoholic and never had any medical issues previously.
submitted by Wheats9k to AskDocs [link] [comments]
What could be my issue and how concerned should I be?
Male 32yo 6feet tall 265 lbs, non-alcoholic and never had any medical issues previously.
2024.05.13 13:51 Oh-Dip-Pillboi Do you help people or not?
In a recent conversation, a fellow Zen redittor helped me by suggesting that I show my understanding and open myself up to an AMA. So, here I am.
Zen is "very economical, it spares effort" (Foyan in Thomas Cleary's Instant Zen). I don't want to add to our hardships, so I'll try to be concise and let the ancients do most of the talking.
Pillboi comment: That old fool makes a good point, yet it would be no transgression to slap him if he doesn't recognize a helping hand.
It's no big secret that the Layman devoured the Diamond Sutra:
Just as Foyan said, the "ancients were quite direct in their ways of helping others. Whenever people came to them, they would show them."
Questions for you: * Do you agree with the five statements of the summary above? Why or why not? * What are your thoughts on the Layman case and my comment? * Did this post help you or not?
AMA.
submitted by Oh-Dip-Pillboi to zen [link] [comments]
Zen is "very economical, it spares effort" (Foyan in Thomas Cleary's Instant Zen). I don't want to add to our hardships, so I'll try to be concise and let the ancients do most of the talking.
Intro: Helping others and yourself is essential.
Currently reading J. C. Cleary's Swampland Flowers. In a letter (No. 4), most likely addressed to a layperson, Dahui writes:Just examine yourself constantly: from morning to night, what do you do to help others and help yourself? If you notice even the slightest partiality or insensitivity, you must admonish yourself. Don’t be careless about this!
In the old days Ch’an Master Tao Lin lived up in a tall pine tree on Ch’in Wang Mountain; people of the time called him the “Bird’s Nest Monk.” When Minister Po Chu-yi was commander of Ch’ien T’ang, he made a special trip to the mountain to visit him.
[...]
Po also asked, “What is the overall meaning of the Buddhist Teaching?” The Master said, “Don’t commit any evils, practice the many virtues.” Po said, “Even a three-year-old child could say this.” The Master said, “Though a three-year-old child can say it, an eighty-year-old man cannot carry it out.” Po then bowed and departed.
Now if you want to save mental power, do not be concerned with whether or not a three-year-old child can say it, or whether or not an eighty-year-old man can carry it out. Just don’t do any evil and you have mastered these words. They apply whether you believe or not, so please think it over.
Helping is a reaction, not a practice.
As to performing the six pāramitās and vast numbers of similar practices, or gaining merits as countless as the sands of the Ganges, since you are fundamentally complete in every respect, you should not try to supplement that perfection by such meaningless practices. When there is occasion for them, perform them; and, when the occasion is passed, remain quiescent. If you are not absolutely convinced that the Mind is the Buddha, and if you are attached to forms, practices and meritorious performances, your way of thinking is false and quite incompatible with the Way.Huang Po (Blofeld translation)
You can be helpful wherever you are.
A monk asked "Where can a sangha member be of service?"Zhaozhou (Green translation, Anecdote 413)
The master said, "Where can you not be of service?"
Helping should happen without attachment.
Once, when the Layman was on his way to sell his bamboo baskets, he stumbled and fell while crossing over a bridge. When Ling-chao saw this, she came to her father’s side and fell on the ground.Layman P'ang (Green translation, 54. Helping Someone Up)
The Layman said, “What are you doing?”
Ling-chao said, “I saw you had fallen, so I came to lend you a hand.”
The Layman said, “But who can see what there is to take hold of?”
Pillboi comment: That old fool makes a good point, yet it would be no transgression to slap him if he doesn't recognize a helping hand.
It's no big secret that the Layman devoured the Diamond Sutra:
However, a bodhisattva should not give a gift while fixing on an object, Subhuti. He should not give a gift while fixing on anything. He should not give a gift while fixing on physical forms. He should not give a gift while fixing on sounds, smells, tastes or objects of touch, or on dharmas.Shakyamuni Buddha (Diamond Sutra, Translation by Paul Harrison)
Epilogue: You can get help from the ancients.
The monk said, "The Dharmakaya does not talk of the Dharma, then do you help people or not?"Zhaozhou (Green translation, Excerpt of Anecdote 118)
The master said, "I answer out of kindness."
Just as Foyan said, the "ancients were quite direct in their ways of helping others. Whenever people came to them, they would show them."
Summary and Discussion
The headings are a summary of my understanding: * Helping others and yourself is essential. * Helping is a reaction, not a practice. * You can be helpful wherever you are. * Helping should happen without attachment. * You can get help from the ancients.Questions for you: * Do you agree with the five statements of the summary above? Why or why not? * What are your thoughts on the Layman case and my comment? * Did this post help you or not?
AMA.
2024.05.13 06:21 PlayerPin Respect Dark Enerjak! (Archie's Sonic the Hedgehog)
Dark Enerjak, Ruler of Dark Mobius
"You arrived just in time, traveler. You will witness my final victory and total domination of this world!"
Biography
Dark Enerjak (or simply Enerjak) was formerly known as Knuckles the Echidna, Guardian of Angel Island. The timeline of this world resembles that of standard Mobius' exactly save for one event: Dark Mobius lacked the interference of Knuckles' time-traveling daughter at the time of Knuckles' would-be assassination. Jaded and still wielding the almighty power of his Chaos Knuckles form, he would slowly corrupt and transform into an evil despot who felled everything before him, including Super Sonic, with almighty force. Embracing his dark power, he adopted the title of Enerjak--the evil god that empowered and corrupted his ancestors before him--and destroying all those who stood in his way, taking the souls of those who managed to survive or resist him to use for his Prelate minions.Decades later, only a scant few Freedom Fighters, led by his daughter Jani-Ca, had their souls intact enough to resist him (which, of course, he allowed by design since he'd be too bored without their resistance). It wasn't until the main timeline's Silver the Hedgehog discovering Dark Mobius that Enerjak decided to fight once again. Enerjak gloats, goads, and takes great entertainment in the entertainment his opponent's struggles give him. Do not forget, though: Enerjak is a god.
Source Key
- Sonic the Hedgehog (1993) [StH#XX]
- Sonic Universe [SU#XX]
- Official Dark Mobius Blog Posts [DM:Post Entry #X]
Hover over a feat to see its source.
Feats performed by Jani-Ca as Enerjak will be labelled under Jani-Jak.
I. Strength
- Shatters rubble used by Silver with a strike.
- Punches through his own energy barrier and slams Silver.
- Flies through part of a building psychokinetically flung by Silver.
- Effortlessly snaps Dark Mobius' Antoine's blade.
- Destroys a stone fist construct from Silver by punching it.
- Physically clashes with Silver hard enough to make a shockwave.
II. Speed
- Erects an energy barrier before Silver can come near.
- Blitzes Silver and easily gets his hands on Dark Mobius' Bunnie.
III. Durability
- Survives an assassination attempt; if this happened like Prime Mobius, then Chaos Knuckles took no damage from a shot that would have killed base Knuckles.
- Undamaged by a bomb from an assassination attempt.
- Undamaged by Dark Mobius' Fiona's laser, which earlier took out a Prelate based on Charmy Bee.
- Ignores Silver slamming him through a building-sized statue and well beyond Angel Island.
- Gets dragged through Angel Island and slammed into it from above by Silver, only complains of a scuffed helmet.
- Tanks his own attacks redirected at him repeatedly which soon cracks his armor, notably having somewhat of a glass jaw from having not felt pain for so long.
IV. Chaos Power
Offensive
- Telekinetically lifts a building.
- Easily overpowers Silver’s telekinesis and holds him in the future Freedom Fighters midair.
- Overwhelms Silver’s psychokinesis again and blasts him with energy.
- Sank Downundah (Australia) offscreen.
- Slams Silver with an energy attack hard enough to embed him into the street and daze him.
- Easily overpowers Dark Mobius' Bark’s ground slam with an energy surge and swiftly steals his soul.
- Disintegrates multiple buildings with an energy blast.
- Telekinetically slams Angel Island into Silver.
Non-Offensive
- Erects a barrier that keeps Silver from proving in further.
- Teleports behind Silver.
- [Jani-Jak] Creates a portal into a tower with no entrance.
Soul Manipulation
- Extracts Remington’s soul, extracted the souls of many other characters offscreen such as Sonic, Shadow, and Eggman.
- Can use extracted souls to create Prelates that he can regenerate even after defeat, which he does later with the souls of the Chaotix.
- Steals Dark Mobius' Antoine’s soul mid-combat.
- Summons a small army of Prelates.
Other
- Restored Eggman’s body after Enerjak vaporized him.
- (Possibly) created a giant statue, which we later see is comparable to nearby buildings.
- Overhears a conversation from the basement of a building while he stands a good distance away, projecting his voice as he does so.
- [Limit] Gets his energy absorbed by Jani-Ca wielding the Sword of Acorns and reciting a ritual, becoming a weak and old man. Meanwhile, Jani-Ca turns into the new Enerjak with the Enerjak power being mostly destroyed upon the sword’s own destruction.
- [Jani-Jak] The dark temptation of Enerjak’s power can be ignored though Jani-Ca doesn’t think she can do it forever.
- [Jani-Jak] Knuckles states Enerjak is immortal.
V. Offscreen Fights
- Defeated Team Dark, a third of GUN’s military, and destroyed Station Square offscreen.
- Sank GUN's fleets beneath the sea.
- Defeated Super Sonic.
Prelates
Robotic slaves of Dark Enerjak, these minions hold the soul and power of their original host amplified by Enerjak's power. Typically, Enerjak will use the Prelates of his former team, the Chaotix, but can be provoked into summoning more.As quite a few Prelates are unnamed, feats belonging to specific Prelates will be labeled with their associated character. The Prelates seem comparable in power, so feats performed by one Prelate should be able to be performed by another sans specific abilities such as Ray's flight and Espio's ninjutsu.
Strength
- [Vector] Performs a superhero landing from a building without damage and breaks through street as it does so.
- [Vector] Crushed by Silver’s rubble and breaks out quickly.
- [Mighty] Casually throws a car that blocked its path.
- [Mighty] Carries a car, intending to bludgeon Silver with it.
- [Mighty] Tackles Dark Mobius' Bark.
- [Espio] Kicks Silver in the back of the head hard enough to daze him.
- [Espio] Chokes out Dark Mobius' Antoine with its tail.
- [Charmy] Knocks down Dark Mobius' Fiona.
- [Saffron] Knocks down Dark Mobius' Rotor, who Jani-Ca later struggles to carry.
- [Charmy+Saffron] Attack Silver simultaneously hard enough to elicit a cry of pain.
- [Charmy+Saffron+Ray] Attack Silver simultaneously hard enough for him to drop concentration and fall from the air.
- [Chaotix] Momentarily overpower Silver’s psychokinesis and crush him with the rubble he shields himself with.
Speed
- [Vector] Would have successfully snuck up on Silver if not for outside interference.
- [Ray] Evades Dark Mobius' Bunnie’s laser.
- [Ray] Evades Dark Mobius' Bean’s bombs.
- [Saffron] Dodges Dark Mobius' Bunnie’s laser.
- [Charmy+Saffron] Catches up to Silver as he flees.
- [Charmy+Saffron+Ray] Catches up to Silver as he tries to flee again.
Durability
- [Vector] Crushed by Silver’s rubble and breaks out quickly.
- [Vector] Recovers from being “knocked out” while Silver and Edmund have a short conversation.
- [VectoLimit] Defeated by Dark Mobius' Fiona redirecting its own laser at it.
- [Vector+Tails/Anti-Feat] Momentarily stunned by a falling telephone pole but visually undamaged.
- [Mighty] Punched by Dark Mobius' Bark, visibly undamaged but sent flying.
- [Mighty/Limit] Defeated by Dark Mobius' Bark slamming it into the street.
- [Espio/Limit] Defeated by a combo attack from Dark Mobius' Rotor and Antoine.
- [Charmy+Saffron+Ray/Limit] Defeated by Dark Mobius' Bean’s bombs.
- [Chaotix/Limit] Gets one-shot by Silver using psychokinetic energy blasts and the Freedom Fighters landing decisive blows.
Energy
- [Vector] Individual lasers slice buildings in half whose tops crush Silver.
- [Vector] Shoots down Dark Mobius' Bean’s bomb.
- [Vector] Its laser forces Dark Mobius' Fiona on her knees even as she blocks it.
- [Chaotix] Fire optical lasers at Silver simultaneously.
Other
- Enerjak can see the movements of Prelates through personal cameras.
- Can come back repeatedly even after initial defeat as long as Enerjak wills it so.
- Their cores can be prevented from being used again by a sufficiently strong power such as Silver.
- [Vector] Reads Silver’s energy and assesses him as a high threat, taking initiative to attack without hesitation.
- [Vector] Would have successfully snuck up on Silver if not for outside interference.
- [Vector] Uses a warped Warp Ring to teleport to another timeline and a different place in time as well, not needing the Time Stone that Silver uses.
- Antoine D'Coolette.
- Bark the Polar Bear.
- Bean the Dynamite, Respect Thread by Mattdoss.
- Bunnie Rabbot.
- Fiona Fox.
- Jani-Ca aka Lara-Su.
- Rotor the Walrus
- Sonic the Hedgehog, Respect Thread by 76SUP and Joshless.
- Silver the Hedgehog, Respect Thread by MaximusMagnus15.