Please note: he went to the vet immediately after he threw up blood with no conclusive diagnosis or issues found. I will call the vet today when they open to see about the scab. I'm hoping to ease my mind until then.
• Species: Cat
• Age: almost 3 years
• Sex Neuter status: Neutered
• Breed: DSH
• Body weight: 11.9 lbs
• History: Vomits his food up twice a month on average. No patterns that we can see that link to a specific flavor. He eats a combo of dry food and Fancy Feast pate everyday.
• Clinical signs: No symptoms at all besides the vomiting. No lethargy, lack of appetite, etc.
• Duration: 2 days
• Your general location: Florida, USA
Cat threw up food and small hair ball 5 hours after his meals on 5/12 (pic below). Blood was found in the second "round" of vomit, but was not seen in the first or third (it was a lot of vomit). He went to the vet immediately where they did x-rays, fluids, and a shot to help with vomiting. Vet said x-rays looked normal but still awaiting reviews from consult. He made it through all day 5/13 eating and drinking, using the bathroom, and acting normally without vomiting. They prescribed him a probiotic powder, metronidazole, and famotidine which I gave him with food. This morning, 5/14, he threw up 15 minutes after eating his wet food and I noticed a small scab-looking thing inside the vomit. Pics below.
Assuming this isn't a serious blockage or injury (since the vet said 24 hours without vomiting was a good sign and x-rays seemed okay), what could this be? Again, hoping to ease my mind until the vet opens. TIA!
Pics of vomit: https://tinypic.host/image/IMG-7146.D9FRAm https://tinypic.host/image/IMG-7168.D9Fjxv
Edited to fix formatting

Hi everyone! I’m a beginner when it comes to watercolor and I really want to learn how to use the medium. I have the Windsor and Newton sketcher’s pocket set and I would really like the 24 half pan metal tin set. However, I can only get it through amazon and I live in a country where the shipping is really high. My local art shops have van gogh watercolors, but only in half pans. The price of a van Gogh 24 piece set is around 60 euros, while the W&N is around 30 pounds on amazon I think. I was thinking if I do get the W&N one and run out of some color, I could just buy a van gogh half pan and stick it in the W&N tin, but I don’t know if it’ll fit.
Can someone recommend which set I should get? I don’t necessarily need a new set of paints, but I would really much like to have one.
Thanks to anyone that replies!

I was in an accident that left me with a spinal cord injury from a young age and because of that I use a wheelchair full time. Ask me anything you’d like to know.

I’m kicking myself for this. Today I was at a Wawa gas station. My friend went inside to buy some snacks and get gas for her car. We were parked by the pump. I see a woman with a small 4 ish year old boy walking around. She’s holding his hand. The women was maybe late 30’s blonde dyed hair. She looked Cuban to me. I’m in Florida so I can spot a Cuban women they dress style themselves a certain way I’m also Hispanic . I noticed her hair mainly because of how pretty the style was and the way it was bleached. She definitely was keeping herself looking clean and classy. She had a sad expression on her face that gave me an uneasy feeling it wasn’t fake at all if she was trying to come off needing money by playing fake distressed. I tend to have a bad/good gift of reading people’s eyes and what they are feeling and all I saw was the face of an abused victim. How she was slouched and her body language seemed so off. Like she was scared of somebody or something. She goes up to this random man pumping gas and at this point I was on my phone talking to someone when I couldn’t hear what she asked him but the man was very cold and violently told her off when she approached him with the child. I didn’t hear what she asked but I’m guessing it was about money and I could tell by his tone he was mad. She walked past my car and I was about to ask her if she’s okay when she went straight to this green van. The type of van that is notorious for kidnapping kids. A large Hispanic man was in the drivers side with a leaner Hispanic man. I thought at first she was going to ask them for money but she sheepishly went up to the drivers window and said something. He gestured her to get inside and I pulled my phone out again to try to get a video. She went inside with the boy and in the back there was another girl child. She looked about ten. Both of the kids must be related since they have a darker complexion and similar features. She was very pale compared to them. She looked frightened going inside the van. At one point the man noticed me pointing my phone and he sped off. I couldn’t get a license plate. All I remember that it was an out of state plate with a grey blue plate.After that whole ordeal I can’t shake off the feeling that she must of been in danger and those kids. I got a blurry video of the van and the two men and that’s it. I’m mad that maybe I should have done more. My friend said the cops wouldn’t have done anything. The women just looked like she was being forced to go around and ask whatever she was asking. It was weird to me that she completely ignored me and was only going to men. I’ve been approached/seen countless people asking me for money before but this is the first time I’ve seen this type of situation give me a bad gut feeling. I don’t even know what to do at this point. I was wondering if there is a data base of possible missing people specifically Hispanic. Her face looked familiar like I’ve seen her somewhere.

My name is Evie, a 32-year-old recently disabled stepmom.
During my son's birthday dinner outing, our family friend, who's always been like an uncle to my kids, exhibited surprising rudeness. Despite my attempts to engage with him throughout the night, he barely acknowledged me. Not a single hello or inquiry about how I was doing. Even when we revealed my wheelchair, which he hadn't known I was using since our last meeting, he remained silent. Instead, he directed inquiries about my mobility directly to my partner, completely ignoring me. His mention of a handicap placard for our vehicle, while practical, underscored his failure to address me directly or show basic courtesy. It was disheartening to witness such behavior from someone we've considered part of our extended family.
Adding to the discomfort, my partner and I had saved a booth for everyone, yet this uncle and his partner purposefully chose the booth next to us, further isolating themselves and disregarding any attempts at socialization from my end. Despite my frustration, I maintained my composure throughout the outing for my son's sake. However, when we stopped by a used book store after dinner, I couldn't bring myself to go in, unwilling to subject myself to another encounter of being ignored.

I'm so tired. I'm 41. Chronic bladder infections as a baby, one that almost killed me. Started having lower back spasms at 11. Doctors were like, huh, that's weird, kid. Welp, enjoy your life.
Got very active and fit, that kept it mosty at bay during my teenage years. Back pain returned in young adulthood. Cried on the way to work every day on the bus, because sitting hurt. Knelt on the floor to type at work. Got a part time job so I didn't have to sit as much. Did PT, got massages.
Migraines slowly started over the years. Recurrent UTI and yeast infection. My back would go out 3 to 4 times a year, regularly, but I was very active after the 2-week recovery period. Kept asking doctors why do I get so much back pain, infections? They were like "Iunno, some people are more prone to it. Welp, enjoy your life!"

1. I don't know what the fuck happened but my neck did something bad when I was lifting a chair and it was months and months of uncontrollable spasms and complete trauma. Barely able to sleep for months. Poorly controlled pain, pain medicine-related trauma from doctors who are so afraid to give me five fucking hydrocodone at a time when I was almost at suicidal levels of pain.

Interstitial cystitis appeared a few months later just for kicks. Gastrointestinal pain started. My nervous system seemed to be jacked up after that. Super reactive to everything.
I pulled myself heroically back to some decent functionality after a few years of painful and exhausting experimentation.
Was getting back into enjoying life. Then new knee pain (chondromalacia) took away roller skating which was my favorite activity in life and probably the main thing that kept me strong and together. I've been working on my knee since 2020 and I still haven't made progress with all the PT. No one knows what to do for it. It's so incredibly frustrating and it's responsible for my slide into deep conditioning. I try to keep active with walking and PT exercises, but nothing equals skating for joy and for strengthening.
I finally piece together my own diagnosis through years of my own reading, brought it to my doctors, who confirmed. (Wish I could get paid for doing My own research). Was enjoying life as much as possible.
Then, one day, my seemingly loving husband of 12 years abandoned with no warning (He actually secretly moved out while I was gone for the weekend and let me know by email that he wanted a divorce, saying that my recent diagnosis made me a ticking time bomb waiting to ruin our lives)
The shock and pain and fear.
Fast forward 2 years through the trauma of utter blindsided betrayal by someone I thought was my best friend, and the mental trauma of being forced to do a whole divorce and fight for my future needs with someone who had suddenly, nonsensically become angry with ME, saying didn't deserve any alimony at all because I created all this chronic pain in my head to manipulate care out of him (Yes, that was his point of view. He believed that my pain was real but that it was mentally-caused. I can't explain it. It's nuts. I think it's basically his twisted rationale to make this my fault and to make abandoning a loving wife with chronic pain acceptable to assuage the guilt)
I haven't worked in years. I don't qualify for disability because I stopped working gradually, before I had a diagnosis, and I trusted my husband. So now I don't have enough recent work credits for disability.
Ironically I was doing relatively well physically when he left. I actually had some hope. Then, out of the blue a year after he left, I developed chronic tailbone pain. I haven't been able to sit down without pain for over a year. It's really a hard condition to treat, no solution in sight but strengthening, which I'm used to and I'm ready to do...
... but my hips have started possibly subluxing in the last few months? I've never had trouble there before because I've historically been very active. I don't drive. I walk everywhere, so those muscles get a lot of exercise.
But I got more deconditioned because JUST gotten over an exhausting trial of LDN which backfired on me (It caused completely new peripheral neuropathy to appear in my hands and feet and then set my migraines to become chronic, every day, for over a month)
Now it hurts to lift my leg when I lay on my side, feels like it gets stuck, like I have to rotate my leg in order to properly lift it. Sometimes I get a sharp pain in the back part where the top of the thigh bone is. Aching today. I know I have a labral tear in that leg, got to get it checked out
I'm suspecting this gradual deconditioning has finally weakened my hip/butt area, allowing my hips to sublux for the first time?
It's literally been 3 days since the amitriptyline has finally kicked in and I've gone a day or two without migraine. I just started to be able to think again.
But today's hip pain is taking me down mentally. It feels like the last straw.
How can I exercise to get better when despite my best efforts, I keep adding injury after injury? They're stacking up. They don't have solutions. I feel like I can't climb my way out.
And all the emotional trauma. I'm just tired. I've been so strong getting through the past 2 years. I don't know how much I have left.
I'm terrified because I can't sit. I can't even use a wheelchair if my hips give out. How the fuck am I supposed to live? Am I going to be bed bound? Thus far in my life it has taken me working at peak functionality to get enough exercise to keep my body together. Functionality has taken a nose dive for years now, despite my best efforts.
How much more can I fucking take?
I'm probably just having a little emotional breakdown. I hope I can improve things.
But I'm just so goddamn fucking tired.
I've tried so hard. Is this how the story ends with me? Alone, disabled, poor, and in more pain?
Thanks for listening to my novel of a rant.

Please use this thread to ask any lawn care questions that you may have. There are no stupid questions. This includes weed, fungus, insect, and grass identification. For help on asking a question, please refer to the "How to Get the Most out of Your Post" section at the top of the sidebar.
Check out the sidebar if you're interested in more information on plant hardiness zones, identifying problems, weed control, fertilizer, establishing grass, and organic methods. Also, you may contact your local Cooperative Extension Service for local info.
How to Get the Most out of Your Post:

Include a photo of the problem. You can upload to imgur.com for free and it's easy to do. One photo should contain enough information for people to understand the immediate area around the problem (dense shade, extremely sloped, etc.). Other photos should include close-ups of the grass or weed in question: such as this, this, or this. The more photos or context to the situation will help us identify the problem and propose some solutions.

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For some background, my mom has struggled with bipolar disorder and is very narcissistic & racist however she is lot better than what she used be when me and my older brother were kids. Due to this behavior our Grandma raised us and hence me and brother are very close to her, so when at the gender reveal party I realised im having a baby girl, I decided I would name her after my grandma and my mother looked overjoyed because it was due to grandma that she is recovered as much as she did.
However she is still a bit cuckoo, my older brother is low contact with my mother after she started treating his kind wife awfully when she found out she was half black, and is thinking of going absolutely no-contact because my mother has been making passive remarks about my to be born niece's possible skin colour. She was even vary of Javier but I am a no-nonsense person and have never let her insult him or hsi family.
But here's where shit hits the fan, after I gave birth I ultimately decided to name my daughter Eloriya, that is not my grandma's name, it's the name of my husband's older sister who died in car accident, it was an awful accident that left my FIL with ptsd and he is now wheelchair bound because his legs don't work.
The reason I named her Eloriya was because when i held my babygirl and I saw her pretty little face the only thing me and quite frankly my husband as well could notice was the uncanny similarity to his sister's baby pictures. My daughter could pass off for her identical twin except she took after my hair colour.
Now when my mother found out, she lost all crap. She started screaming like a maniac and hurling insults to my husband and his family, mind you we were still in the hosipital and she had come to visit me with my MIL and FIL because i had a risky delivery and had to stay overnight. She started accusing my husband on brainwashing me into this and tried to attack him, and accused my MIL of forcing me to name my daughter after her dead daughter.
I couldn't take it, I was tired after pushing out a dang mini human outta me. I screamed at my mother that not every MIl is like her, who forces her wishes on their DIL's. Her face dropped as my husband and inlaws looked on in shock.. I told her off for being an awful mother and that how she could still see nothing apart from herself and what she wanted, unlike my MIL who has always treated my like the daughter she never had I told her if it went like this ill go no-contact with her and then she can enjoy the mess she made and then told the nurse to drag my mother out who was now crying hysterically.
I'll be honest with you, I didn't think I was the a-hole but the never-ending messages from my mom's side of my family calling me an ungrateful daughter who couldn't understand her mother was trying to protect her and asking me how dare i bring back her past and choose my MIL over her is making me think twice. So reddit Am I The Asshole?

Hi everyone,
I'm considering buying a used Van Rysel race bike, specifically the EDR AF model. It's a size large with an aluminum frame and a carbon/aluminum fork. The bike features Shimano 105 components with 11 speeds, Fulcrum R6 wheels, and clipless pedals. It's about 4 years old but is described as being in 'like new' condition without any scratches.
The asking price is €600. Do you think this is a good deal? Any insights or advice would be greatly appreciated!

I've been playing for about 5 days now and I'm silver 3 but unless I see obvious unquestionable hints that virtually tell me what country I'm in I hardly ever guess correctly.
I'm playing duels (moving) and unless I see a domain name on a shop or van, or a flag, or a capital city sign, or something that basically tells me where I am, I almost always guess incorrectly. There's only 2 countries I can get right 100% of the time without seeing any major location hints and they are the UK (because I live here) and Nigeria (because of the police car that follows).
Even seeing a language doesn't really help me in other countries all the time because multiple countries often speak the same language. I'm just not capable of seeing a utility pole and knowing "hey that's an Albanian utility pole". Or seeing a specific road marking or pedestrian sign and knowing what country uses that specific one.
I can continent guess easily because obviously I can tell when whether I'm in North America, South America, Europe, Africa or Asia but knowing what specific country is extremely difficult without seeing something in the location that literally tells me what country.
I found a website called geohints which I'm trying to study to better prepare me for duels but there's just too much data to remember, my brain isn't that good at recalling information.
Besides grinding single player for 12 hours a day to "get gud", what's objectively the best way to practice at this game? When I play chess I play tactics, read books, study games, opening theory etc but I'm lost as to the best way to improve with geoguessr.

So for context, I’m 18M and I’m currently travelling Europe with my dad in a van.
I brought about 8 days worth of clothes so that we can get away with doing washing once a week because it’s only two of us. But by the end of the week I’ve used almost all of my clothes whereas my dad has only gone through like three sets.
Every day I change my underwear, socks, and shirt. My pants I don’t really wash unless I need to wash them because I rotate between a few different pairs depending on what we’re doing that day (like hiking pants for hiking, bike pants if we’re going mountain biking, casual pants for general use etc).
But yesterday when we were doing the laundry my dad said, “how come you always have so much more laundry than I do” and I’ve never really thought about it before because I normally just get changed every day, especially because we don’t have access to showers every single day (being in a van and it’s too cold still to use the cold water shower at the back of the van).
Bearing in mind that every day we’re doing something active so I usually get hot and sweaty.

So, I've been a semi nomadic sketchbag for my entire adult life(39afab), and disabled since before i grew tits. campers , buses, backpacks, hitching from NY to ATL to The ville, haggling with chinatown bus drivers, the occasional hop out of rocky mount, trading tit pics for airline credit or gas, whoring for truck repairs, facilitating psychoactives, etc etc. last year i ended up in the hospital, numb from the waist down, not because of a car wreck, fight, or fall.... because i grew a cyst inside one of my vertebrae. two emergency surgeries in a week . I was told I'd never walk again, made peace with the fact id never have another genital orgasm, and started learning how to straight cath myself so i could be independent of the piss bag. To everyone else's surprise, i got competent with a wheelchair , and then a walker, and now i use a cane about half the time. no need to catheterize, and i can use my genitals again. Pretty awesome. but what sucks is.... i can't even carry water. a gallon is 8#. my lift limit is five pounds, and even that is agony to carry for more than about 2 miles. recently relocated on the word of former partner, and they have basically hung me out to dry - housing was promised but not actually available, and i don't have like 3k laying around to toss at a lease... and, Praise Eris, how frustrating. it's damn near summer, weather's good, there's hella urban camping available. but i can't even haul water. i use rolling luggage for my personal 'property. so instead of making camp and figuring out stuff from the comfort of my own independence, I'm begging friends and family to help me stay.. somewhere. I'm going to have to leave this city/region to have stability again, and doing so means i have to drop out of school. you dont know what you got till it's gone. your health and the accompanying ability to do what you need to is fucking invaluable. to all you vagabonds: take care of yourselves. hop a freightliner for me. hike that ravine that i can't. tell your sled dogs FASTER, for me. i hope one day i will be well enough to shrug off being tossed on. the street as the minor inconvenience it used to be, but until then... get it, y'all. don't let your spirit die. see you on the road.

Hi all. I’m 34 female and I grew up in very rural Illinois. I’ve experienced a lot of close death in last 4 years, so a little heads up and trigger warnings. They’ve all seemed to build up and crescendo into this current wave I find myself under and I guess this is me reaching for some help. In 2019, a close friend who I had been traveling and working with was killed by random gun violence. I had been with him the day before, said ’see you tomorrow’ and then he was gone. Besides grandparents, at the age of 29, I hadn’t experienced a close death of someone my age and loosing this friend rocked me hard. It seems since this moment, death really latched o to me. Two years later, one of my very best friends passed from a fentanyl overdose only days after we had spent 3 months side by side. We traveled the United States in his Van living together, went separate ways for less than a week, and then I was getting a call from his friend who found him. I had to notify all his friends and family. At the end of last year, my best friend of 27 years, truly my sister and closest companion in this worlds, unexpectedly ended her life. There was never a single sign I saw as her closest friend. She was dating someone new, I found the circumstances suspicious as he was there when her death occurred, but I could not convince her family to pursue an investigation. Her boyfriend then died over an overdose one month later, so whatever answers he had remain forever gone. On Christmas Day, a little over 2 months after the death of my best friend, my 72 year old father told me he had pancreatic cancer. I put my grief for my best friend in the back burner, moved home, and threw myself into being my father’s main caretaker. On March 1st, my father passed away. I’m now caring for his 15 acres of property and packing up his home alone to eventually sell it.
My best friend and I used to talk about how we’d be there for each other our entire lives, especially through the loss of our parents. Now that my dad has been gone over 2 months and the shock of a new diagnosis turned to hospice caretaking to death has settled in, all the grief is hitting me like a wave. I miss my best friend more than ever, like I pushed away her death to care for my dad and now it’s fully surfacing.
Grief has wrung me dry. It took who I was and twisted it into a million knots that I don’t know how to begin to untangle. I would like to seek therapy but I feel I need more than the ‘what stage of grief are you in’ approach because it’s all become so complicated. Most days I feel ok staying busy packing my dads home and then nights alone, I fall apart. I am living for them and would never harm myself, for them, but the majority of my support system was wiped out in the last 6 months and everything seems so hard.

Enter Mix Here. Entries close 4-June-2024 23:59:59 Pacific Daylight Time

Seen The Blueprints?
As announced last week, we're playing trance around the world for this mix contest!

Theme

Trance Around The World

For this contest, you'll be limited to artists that hail from your assigned country. For example, if you choose England, you would use songs from artists that were born in England, like Above & Beyond, Lange, or Ashley Wallbridge.

Inspiration and Rules

How are countries selected?

To provide fairness, last week there was an entry form to request your preferred countries.
Users have been messaged with their assigned country.

What if I didn't enter last week; what should I do now?

Country selection is now first come, first serve.
You need to message me on Reddit your preferred country before making your mix. Failure to do so will result in your mix being disqualified.

Is there a limit for how many mixes can be made for each country?

Yes; only two mixes (i.e., users) can use each country. At the end of this post are the claimed countries.

So what tracks should I be using in the mix?

At least one person in the artist or remix listed must have been born in your selected country. As an example, the song Above & Beyond - Sky Falls Down (Armin van Buuren Remix) could work for England (Tony, Jono), Finland (Paavo), or the Netherlands (Amrin).
Please message me for requested exceptions to this native-born rule. Consideration will be made for artists that were born in one place but have lived in and made another country their home. For instance, an artist born in Laos but moved to Vietnam at 5 years old and been there since may qualify for both a Laos-inspired mix and a Vietnam-inspired mix.

What about vocalists?

Vocalists can count towards the country so long as they are generally credited with the song and feature somewhat prominently on the track. For instance, Armin van Buuren featuring Betsie Larkin - Safe Inside You will count for USA (Betsie) and Netherlands (Armin). However, Salt Tank - Eugina counts for England (Salt Tank) only, even though it samples Tori Amos (USA), as the song only briefly samples Tori and is not "Salt Tank featuring Tori Amos - Eugina."
If you have questions on specific tracks or artists, feel free to ask here or message me!

Genre Restrictions?

Your mix should be "majority trance."
This means at least (i.e., ">=") 50% of your mix should be classified as trance. 12 songs in your mix? 6 songs should be trance. And so forth.

How do you determine if a song is trance?

At least one of the following places must have some version of trance listed or tagged as the genre or sub-genre for the track:

• Discogs
• Music purchasing site (e.g., Beatport, Juno, Bandcamp)
• Official upload to a music site by the artist or label (e.g, Artist SoundCloud page, Label's YouTube Channel)

In short, if Beatport, Bandcamp, Discogs, and the actual artist don't consider the song trance, it's probably not trance.

Other Rules

Your mix should not have been made before the contest start date and should be your own.
Mix Length is 60 minutes.

Entry

Enter Your Mix Here
I'll upload them anonymously. Keep it HQ (V0 VBR, 256+ mp3, AIFF/WAV/FLAC).
Mix due date: June 4, 2024 by 11:59:59PM Pacific Daylight Time. That's a nice few weeks to make a mix.
Good luck all! Please use this thread for questions if you have any!

Countries Claimed

Two users have claimed each country below unless otherwise specified.
Yes, this contest is allowing both United Kingdom as an option and its individual countries (e.g., England) as options.

• Australia
• Belgium
• Denmark (1/2)
• England (1/2)
• Finland (1/2)
• Germany
• Ireland (1/2)
• Italy
• Japan (1/2)
• Netherlands
• Northern Ireland (1/2)
• Norway
• United Kingdom
• United States

Good morning and apologies, the following is a bit of a rant.
I have been living in Berlin (on and off) since the 80s, so I am used to generally rude behaviour of motorists. However, what I am not used to (yet) is being nearly run over at green pedestrian lights -- this happened to me this morning TWICE.
First time when crossing a traffic light with my daughter on the way to her KiLa. White transport van comes at high speed from behind and turns right INTO US, missing us by maybe 20-30 cm. Drives on completely unfazed. Lady crossing the other way just said "Das war knapp" (Berlin speak for "You are lucky to be alive, mate").
Second time on my way to the tram. Pedestrian crossing on Invalidenstraße (long stretch between Lehrter Str and Alt-Moabit -- they put a pedestrian crossing in the middle, so that pedestrians like me can cross the street safely, LOL). Stepped about 2-3m into the street (green pedestrian light, all cyclists and tram nicely waiting), when a boomer wagon with a confused looking boomer couple suddenly shoots past in front of me (half a meter to a meter) at about 40-50 kph. The driver was probably focussing on the NEXT traffic light at Alt Moabit and really really wanted to catch the green phase over there.
How the fcuk is this normal??? How are you supposed to safely cross a road at a light when motorists are totally happy to kill you for the convenience of not having to stop??
In future, I will look twice, even at green lights, if I am the only one crossing the road. But I don't think even that would have prevented the delivery van from running into me and my daughter from behind (unless I get a 360° LIDAR on my head).

This may be a bit odd but I bought a label to ship my boyfriend graduation gift to him, but I haven’t dropped the package off yet.
When I was going today to reprint off the customs forms and sign them, I noticed the label said “In Transit”, but I have the box with me right here?
It says “We have your package - Pensacola, Florida” but I don’t even live in Florida? How is my label being used and going TO HIM when I haven’t shipped it yet?
Please help!

I don’t even know where to begin. 26F. I have had a lot go on in my life (not to short anyone else, because life is screwed). I’m just going to tell my story because I don’t know what else to do. As I’m telling this story please keep in mind, I don’t have all of the information and I’ve been kind of surviving up until this point. When I was 3-8 months old my father packed me and the dog up, and left my mother without telling her while she was at work back in 1997(Florida to Pennsylvania). having no idea because I was an infant, going in to toddler my dad loved the crap out of me. I felt safe, and cared for. My dad ended up sending me to a catholic school for 1st- 5th. started growing and realized that I have a difficultly keeping concentrated, was way friendler than everyone. @ 9 years old he had me speak to my mother for the first time and all she said was mean shit about him and I cried and hung up.
I had noticed my dad started to grow aggravated with me, and would say some down right mean shit. Not let me have my own personality, Embarrassed me by writing mean shit about what I did wrong on sticky notes and would tell me to keep in on my shirt all day at school. Back me into corners like he was a big bully if I didn’t do things right/his way. He through a birthday party for me when I was 11 and then was like “look at how nobody showed up” when he was most likely the reason they didn’t. Before sixth grade started, he moved us back down to Florida. So from catholic school to public. I noticed bigger changes in him and it was a complete 180 for me, going from a religious school to a public. It was like there was no longer the happiness in him and he would pick on me and bully me, when I started going to public schools I was bullied as well there. I would come home from school crying and he stated “I’ll give you a reason to cry”. Would be very physically abusive. Would even threaten to send me to my mothers which I was scared of because of the mean shit she said when I was 9. He sent me to another girls mom to learn about “women things”- literally just how to shave my f**** legs. I eventually went to the schools therapist in 6th grade and tried to tell them what was going on without getting my dad in trouble or him hearing about it and doing something worse, that didn’t happen. I guess I blacked out most of my memory’s about things because of the way I needed to cope but I remember writing him letters and begging him to talk to me because he started just not speaking to me at all, would leave me at home while he worked and told me to lock the doors and hide. I eventually tried to disconnect from it all in my head to go with the motions. Eventually before 8th grade started we moved up to Maryland and moved in with my cousins because he had claimed he lost a lot of money in Florida( in recent years he told me the school was trying to get him charged for the things I said back then to the therapist.) we became more distant because he wasn’t very friendly and would hide in the basement. Moved into my god parents house because eventually he had enough issues with my cousins he didn’t want to be “there problem” anymore. We became more distant as he would just hide in there basement as well, I’d go down there just to talk with him and he’d just be this mean person I didn’t know anymore. Still being a very emotionally abusive person. I got arrested 3 months before graduation because I had weed and cigarettes at school.
When I was 18 I moved into my 2nd boyfriend’s house. Not a good idea looking back at it because it was totally a trap house and I had no clue what I was doing there.(drugs) that’s what I was doing. He had no clue & didn’t care to notice. A lot of co-dependence was there because I stayed there for 4 years.
In 2018 (I was 18 at this point) he was going delirious for about 4-5days and would tell me stuff like take my stuff, I’m going to die ect. Wouldn’t let me take him to the hospital, just wanted to die, thank god my god mother was there when he collapsed and had a ambulance come and get him, he went into a diabetic coma it lasted for 1.5 months or so, he came out of it and basically told me he should’ve died and that he wanted to.
That made things worse mentally for me, I did a lot of fucked up things in the 4 years I was with the boy I was doing drugs with, he also was very physically abusing, as so was I at this point. We broke up and I did everything I could not to go back to living with my father who ended up with enough money to buy a place in my name. I ended up living there for a while and nothing good came from it.
A lot of drinking and boyfriends and dumb shit happened and I was completely out of it until I got a DWI in late 2019. Really woke me up. I started wanting better for myself, knowing I could just didn’t know how. I got into YET ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP, and thought it was good for me, two years in we decided we were going to buy a home (23 years old at this point) we bought it and a lot was wrong with the house and clearly the boy I bought it with because he was into a really odd kink, had girls in his phone, and would not introduce me to his female friends. On top of that he did not doing ANYTHING to help me fix the home. A year into owning the home I broke up with him and lost my job. I was depressed for 7-8 months, got another job and about 1.5 years after the break up someone came up to me and asked me on a date. (I still lived with my ex in the house we own). (I was completely honest with him and up front about everything.)
He has shown me grace, kindness, and compassion. He had shown me a whole new perspective in life. He also had gone through a really traumatic past. Starting of the relationship was rough, I was feral and he gets defensive really easy. We have stuck this thing out and I am 7 months in therapy and he just had his first session in years today. I would like to consider this success. I just changed therapist because the one I had been going to wasn’t as good as I would’ve liked them to be. We are now 1.5 years in, and I’m still trying to figure myself out and currently won’t hear from the new therapist until the 21st of may. I’m struggling mentally but not half as bad as I used to. I guess I’m just looking for new perspectives and some positive words at this point. My boyfriend and I are on opposite schedules for the next 2.5 months and I can tell I’m still very co-dependent, in my head I’m hoping his new therapist doesn’t tell him we are not right for each other. I’m so full of stress and trauma it’s crazy. I don’t even know who I am or if I fully feel happy in any situation.
Any kind words would help. Sorry for the all over the place read.

My boyfriend purchased a used car in Florida on March 6th and drove it back to Michigan. The dealer gave him a temp plate. The temp expired and they had to send another one (it was late so my boyfriend was without a car for a day.) At this time, I accessed information about the car using the VIN and it didn't show that the car had been transferred but did show that it was plated (the temp I presume.)
What do we do?

Good morning.
TL;DR: I paid a contractor £1982.25 to handle property maintenance and gardening work on a rental property. The contractor repeatedly assured me that the work was complete or nearly complete, but property inspections and subsequent photo evidence contradicted these claims. Despite multiple excuses from the contractor, ranging from personal injuries to subcontractor issues, the work was never completed. After attempting various methods of communication without success, the contractor has become unresponsive. He has not finished the work, yet still holds my money, and I am now considering my options for recourse.
I have used a guy ("L") to do some garden works. Recommended by a work colleague he was personable and punctual when I used him for some gardening work when I had COVID. Since he told me that he did property maintenance and gardening and I was pleased with his work thus far, I booked him to do some work on my old house which I now rent out in Surrey; repainting some old water damage after a repair and replace an old brown wooden back door showing signs of wear and rot for a new uPVC one. He said yes and needed money for the work as the door was a large lump of the cost. As it was March 2023 I gladly paid him the whole sum (£1982.25) and on the 26th July he said that all the works had been done and just needed to finish the door but was having access issues with tenent but due to complete the works on the Saturday. All good. I asked him about the £300 of gardening, he said he would come over in August. Fine.
L then said that he was having mechanical issues with his van and could not attend the gardening. Me, being understanding, said get the van fixed and let's sort another date when he's back on the road. The property inspection report done by the estate agent came through on 23rd August and my wife noticed that in the photos the back door had not been completed. In fact, there was no evidence of any of the work having been done. I was suspicious that the works had not in fact been done.
I asked my property management company and they suggested that it was unlikely to show his work in the photos, since the inspection happened in June/early July time because the works were done after the date of the property report. It was possible, they suggested, that the report was sent was after the works had been completed but the inspection was done before that was why the photos didn't match what I was being told. Probably.
The property management company / estate agent I pay for my fully managed property confirmed this might have been the case but I was still suspicious myself and unsure. I attempted to reach out to him using WhatsApp on the 22nd January, our usual line of communication, but no response.
I learnt on 4th February from the cleaner at work who knows him and recommended him in the first place that he had been caught cheating on his girlfriend on Christmas day and was attacked by her with a broken bottle and now has an arm injury preventing him from working again. It was all in the news. There is an article in the newspaper about the event. She also told me that he had a new phone number which she gave me. She also told me that he had also been drinking heavily since his mother had been diagnosed with cancer last year and she was worried the he had turned into "a bit of a deadbeat". I was concerned so messaged him on both numbers I now had.
He responded on the same day on the new number only, saying that he had been embarrassed to tell me that he had not completed.
He said he was sorry and could we book in the work to get done. I replied that, as long as the work gets done on my rented house which is my main concern (as someone else is living there and paying for the house to be kept in good order), we can then talk about the £300 of gardening afterwards but I also asked for photos of the work when it was finally completed.
On 5th February we agreed for him to complete the work on the 14th February.
My cleaner friend, now mortified with him too, called him and he assured her that all the work had been done. I messaged him the following week to say I was thrilled and asked for the photos. Of course I trusted but wanted to verify for myself.
I asked for the photos on the 19th February of the works that had taken place; he replied that he had gotten sepsis and had been in hospital and just got home and he had just called "the guy" he sent out to do the works and he had not done it and he was "fuming". That he had "seized trading" [sic] but wanted to make sure "this was all sorted" and "all I can do is apologise" and hope that I would understand and had booked in Saturday to give him recovery time, and then told me Tuesday, which then became the following Saturday.
He assured me that "his guy" was now rebooked the Sunday 25th February 12pm and he would personally make sure it was done. I said this would have to be the last time as I need the work done and he had now had enough time and chances and was not telling me every time he had failed to get the work done. I asked for the photos on the 26th. He replied that the guy he sent to do the works didn't show up and "he was fuming" and was going to personally oversee that the work was done. He was now appearing to me to be simply more than just unlucky. He assured me that the Sunday he would get the work done. This would be 4th March.
I chased for photos 4th March. No response. I chased on 6th March via WhatsApp. No response. The next property inspection report was sent to me on the 8th March it is clear that there has been no works done in the photos and I had reason to believe that he has not completed any of the work and still has my money. In fact, I suspect that he has no intention of doing the work at all and simply keeping the money.
On the 14th March I asked for his contact details to write to him formally within 7 days. No response.
On March 20th I looked up his email which had the original quote on it and wrote him a letter and sent that, with his original quote asking for my money back plus 8% per annum calculated to 29th March 2024 for £2140.83 for additional inconvenience and expenses I have incurred in chasing for my money back for a year now. I also sent a hard copy of the letter to his address by recorded post (which got signed for) asking for the same and needed a response by 2nd April.
No response.
I don't know what to do now. I hear from my cleaner friend that he's moved house and ghosted everyone. I checked his invoice, he is not a LTD. He's in the wind. He's not responding to letters or emails or WhatsApps and he has around £2000 of my money and simply kept it.
I've tried renegotiating the works multiple times over the last year, I've tried contacting him and now he's just stopped replying. I think I've been reasonable and tried my hardest to make it work out and keep in touch but I just want my money back.
Have I lost my money or is there anything else I can do now? What are my next steps?

Normally you'd never catch me on here. This being my very first post after using Reddit for many years. So here goes nothing and I'll keep it short.
Hi, I'm a 26 year old from Florida who is your A-Typical mans man. I've always been called older than I am and constantly try to understand the world and the people around me better and improve myself.
I work in an armed capacity and see the highs and lows of society most every day. I am 6'5 and weigh 285lbs but I'm trying to cut to around 275, my ideal weight. I used to do powerlifting and I love heavy weights, it's a weird obsession for me. Man things, pick things up, put things down lol.
I considered myself open minded and patient with people. I'm a good public speaker and I stand my ground on things I feel I must protect. My job requires it, but I've always been that way.
What Im looking for, I likely won't find, but I'm very willing to give it a shot. I want a girl who's 19-27, preferably white but I'm open to anything, petite in size, kind, considerate and wants to really work towards a future for herself. I'm a big dude and I like smaller girls, fun to lift you up and all that. If you think you're cute, I'll likely find you adorable. You don't have to be anything but you.
I enjoy video games when I'm not working and if you do too, that's a huge bonus. I'm the romantic guy who will surprise you with random trips to get ice cream or take you shopping on a whim. My version of adventure is hopping in my car, picking a direction and just driving for fun. Life is too short to waste happiness or time and that's exactly why I'm here.
If you give me you, I'll give you the world.
I'm willing to make accomodations and work things out for my relationship so it results in the best it can be. I give my all, and tend to protect and fight for things I love and believe in.
Honesty, loyalty, strength and in all, honor. Those are my most sacred values.
This is Reddit after all, and this is just a wall of text, so if any of this resonates with you and you think there might be something to let flourish between us, message me on here and we'll talk and hopefully move off the platform to understand each other better. I am an open book, with nothing to hide.
Everything should happen naturally, be it fast or slow, whatever is right, is right. I hope you're out there and I hope I can make you the happiest girl in the world.

• L