From the beginning...
Cast

Part 2, Chapter 10

The next morning dawns cold and clear. It is plain that autumn is upon the land, and with the Great Glacier just leagues to the north, winter will come soon. The party goes about their morning business, eating (everyone), checking the state of the beard and deciding whether or not to shave it off (Arthur, generally, but also Atticus as Novos doesn’t grow a beard and Zander doesn’t shave his), climbing into armor (pretty much everyone except Dillium, Felicity, and Pocky), feeding and loading horses and asses (pretty much everyone, but particularly Zander, Arthur, Atticus, and Pocky), and finally packing up the pavillionsol (Dillium). Ready for the day’s journey, the group mounts up. On cue, the guide appears, apparently having prepared well ahead. If he’s irritated that the party slept all the way until dawn, he has the good grace to keep that to himself.
Felicity speaks up. “We’ve changed our minds, actually. I don’t think there’s any particular benefit in going to Dragon’s Perch—”
“I agree.”
“—so we’re going to go to Samek instead.”
“Samek? Hmmm. Do they know you are coming? If they don’t, it will take them a while.”
“No, they don’t know we’re coming, that I am aware of.”
The guide nods once and sets out. Much of the day is uneventful, and it does warm up to a comfortable level. By late afternoon, those with tender backsides are wondering when the ride will conclude when the guide raises his hand in a universal gesture of ‘stop and shut up a minute.’ The party still hasn’t learned that gesture, but fortunately there are no giants about [1]. “We’re here,” is all he says.
“Where?” “I don’t see anything.” “What are we supposed to see?” Like tourists on vacation, they peer around in all directions. They can’t see the entrance for the hill. Or rather, the entrance to the gnomish town of Samek is so well hidden in the side of the hill that for a while, only Dillium can see the faint outline of the round doorway. One by one, Flea, Arthur, and Zander finally pick it out. Novos is absolutely certain they are playing a prank on him. Arthur is first. Knocking on the hill seems odd, but practically before he gets a third knock, a small hole opens up around waist height. Two beady little eyes peer out (at Arthur’s belt).
“What!?”
“We are here—”
“So I see.” The window closes.
Zander walks up and knocks. The same window opens, and the same beady little eyes peer out.
“What!?”
“Do you know who I am?” Zander asks.
The beady little eyes look him up and down. “No,” and the window closes.
Dillium tries next. Knock, window, eyes. “Good day. We are here to see—”
“So see.” Window shuts.
Novos walks up. “I know how to do this.” Knock, window, eyes, increasingly aggravated tone. “Let us in.”
“No.”
Felicity has had enough of this. Walking up to the door, she stands for a moment gathering her thoughts. Knock, window, eyes, aggravated tone. “Good day. I’m here on behalf of the Duke of Soravia to see the wise men of your town, or those in charge.”
“Which ones?”
“What?”
“Which ones, the wise men, or those that are in charge?”
“How about if we start with the ones in charge, and perhaps they will decide to allow us to speak with the wise ones.”
The beady little eyes peer out, look around at the party, and appear to give that some thought. “Wait here.” The window closes.
Minutes pass. Tens of minutes pass. Novos gets bored and walks up to the door. He barely gets a third knock in before the window opens. A different set of beady little eyes peers out, and a different aggravated voice says, “What do you want now?”
“We’ve been waiting for a while, and—”
“—And you’ll continue to wait!.” The window slams shut unnecessarily roughly.
“Why you—” Rough arms grab Novos from behind and pull him away before he can do something regretful.
“We’ll wait, as they’ve asked,” Felicity says. She looks around to ask the guide how long they can expect to wait, but he’s disappeared.
The evening passes. As the cold sets in, Atticus and Pocky gather enough light branches for a fire. There’s no benches or logs to sit on, so they squat or sit on the ground. Arthur has taken to pulling off portions of his armor and working on polishing and repairing the scorch marks from the lava snakes [2]. Atticus and Mar debate the relative benefits of following the letter of the law versus being merciful, though in the end, both of them seem to be arguing the same things in violent agreement. Pocky falls asleep against Modred’s side as Beaker plays with a bone left over from… Wait, where did he get that bone anyway?
Finally, the reality that the night is upon them sets in. A proper camp is set, and watches begin. Zander takes the first watch, but sees nothing of interest. He does hear the chirping of grasshoppers, the droning of the cicadas, and the baying of the hounds. Suddenly, the hounds stop. Unnerved, Zander wakes Arthur, who has the next watch. Arthur, Atticus, and Zander take a turn around the camp, but cannot see nor hear anything that sounds like dogs. Arthur agrees to start his watch a few minutes early and Zander takes Pocky inside the pavillionsol to sleep. Arthur’s, and then Dillium’s watches pass uneventfully. Novos, as normal, takes the last watch. As usual, he is so wrapped up with his puzzle box that he notices absolutely nothing.
The cold morning brings breakfast, bickering, and an irritated Novos marching up to the door to bang on it. “We’ve been here all night,” he informs the guard.
“Yes. Yes you have.” The window closes.
Knock. Window. Eyes. “When will we see—”
“When it is time.” The window closes.
Before he can knock again, Dillium grabs his wrist, pushing him back, she squares herself to the door. “When it is time, please inform us.” She says to the closed window.
The window opens and two beady little eyes peer out. A slightly irritated voice replies, “What else would we do?” The window closes.
Several hours pass as the valley warms up. Arthur, Pocky, Atticus, and Mar all work on armor, doing the necessary daily ritual of dusting, oiling, checking rivets to make sure they are still tight and sound. Polish is applied, worked into the metal, and removed. Bickering, some good natured and others not, flows. At midmorning, the guide turns up suddenly, and squats down near the fire. Minutes later, the window opens and familiar eyes peer out. Felicity quickly crosses over to the door.
“Is the council ready for us?” She asks.
“Council? You wanted to speak with those who lead.”
“Yes. I assume that would be your leadership council.” Felicity replies.
“So it is. So it is. There certainly are a lot of you. You can’t all come.” The window closes.
Felicity thinks quickly and makes a motion to Dillium. Knocking gently, she waits for the window to open. “How many of us may come?” She asks sweetly.
“Uhm… “ The window closes. A minute later it re-opens. “Three.” The gnome says.
“Fine. I agree.”
“You agree? I mean, Yes, of course you agree. Come, come!” Suddenly in a hurry, the gnome opens the door, which slides open silently.
As Felicity and Dillium take a step toward the door, the guide steps up behind them. “Where are you going?” Flea asks imperiously.
“The little ones know me.”
“Which ones?”
The guide thinks. “Mayhaps all of them?” With a slight shrug, Felicity accepts that, and they all pass into a dark room, barely tall enough to stand up in.
Dillium is the tallest of the small group, and she has to stoop over to get through the passageway. The guide bends his head down a bit, but Felicity strides forward as if she owns the place, the top of her hair only occasionally brushing the ceiling of the passage. There are guards in dark metal armor in front and behind, but the guard who let them in the door is wearing a much more colorful shirt. As their eyes grow accustomed to the darkness, they note that there are luminescent lichens on the walls, providing a dim light that casts no shadows and fails to illuminate the armored gnomes.
The corridor stretches on for ages. There are branching tunnels to either side, and once, down. Tiny faces can be seen in the dim light as word spreads of the Big’uns. Dillium’s back is screaming by the time they finally reach a room and stop. A door on one side of the room is guarded by two more of the dark-skinned, dark-armored gnomes and a small fire is burning in the middle of the room. The benches around the room are designed for shorter legs and smaller butts, so the guide simply squats down. Dillium sits and starts to work the kinks out of her back. The guards don’t speak, but every once in a while, a face peers in through the open doorway they came in. Some faces are much smaller than others, and a motherly hand frequently grabs the tot and hustles them along.
The trio waits.
***
Pocky and Zander practice sword work as Atticus watches and occasionally tosses out suggestions. Mar naps. Arthur works on removing scorch marks from his armor while Novos plays with his puzzle box and loafs. Something draws Arthur’s attention. As he looks up, he sees eyes staring at him intently peering out from a bush. Without breaking eye contact, he feels around until he grabs Novos’ head and points it at the bush. Novos stares, uncertain what he’s meant to be looking at. “Zander!” Arthur hisses. He points at the bush with too many eyes. Well, two is too many for a bush. Zander looks. He looks some more. Arthur looks away for a moment, and when he looks back, the eyes are gone. Everyone runs over and crowds around the bush. Novos sees what looks like prints—paw prints not unlike Modred’s pawprints, though Modred is being lazy over next to the pavillionsol. Novos looks around, but sees no other paw prints. The men walk around the bush looking for other tracks, but only manage to obscure everything.
***
An hour passes. The guide lounges as if he has nothing on his mind. Dillium meditates, while Felicity tries to work out what the team’s next move should be. Somewhat abruptly, a young gnome opens the door and comes through. “Ready are you?” The darkened room has only a few dim lights. An ancient gnome sits on a three-legged stool in the middle of the room, a small rod in his hand. Eight or nine other gnomes cluster around the small room, some sitting on tiny gnome-sized benches, others standing. Any whispering that might have been going on ceases when the Big’uns come into the chamber.
The eldest speaks. “Warren. Several turnings it has been since last among us you came. Tell. What is the state of the above-realm?”
“They grow bolder. I have seen them throughout the valley, and without fear. If you are to act, you might contemplate doing so soon.” The gnomes chatter amongst themselves in a foreign tongue. The elder lets it go for a few minutes, then he raps on the floor with his rod. Silence returns.
“As I have feared it is. Soon must we act. Well to see you it is. Not so long to visit should you wait.” Turning his attention to Felicity, he inquires, “Please to tell name and purpose for disturbing.”
Felicity tells who she is, and allows Dillium to introduce herself. Flea announces that war is soon to be upon the land. The Duke of Soravia needs friends and allies for the coming conflict, and wishes to include the gnomes. The gnomes chatter nervously, and some of the chatter sounds of anger or fear. Again, the elder waits several minutes and then raps his rod upon the ground.
“Aware of the duke we are, but no call to extend friendship hand we have heard. What does the duke wish of us?” The chatter now is less nervous and more fearful.
“The danger to us all is great, but the duke understands that each should contribute within their talents and means. I suggest that your greatest assistance may lie in logistics, and supply. Perhaps providing some of the greatly admired gnomish craftsmanship would help to raise funds. Any assistance that you willingly provide for the benefit of one and all is exactly enough.” The chatter and babble of the gnomes in the room sounds almost relieved, but still a touch fearful. The elder allows it to go on for several minutes before he raps on the floor once. Saying something in gnomish, he raises his hand. One by one, the gnomes lift their hands out parallel to the floor. It takes a moment or two, but finally all of them agree.
“Determine what we can contribute, we must. If any. As talk we must, a favor for us could you do.” He speaks a few words of gnomish before continuing.
***
“So what is inside that puzzle box you keep playing with?” Arthur asks. He seems more tired of the delay than curious, and is simply passing the time. Mar casts an irritated glance at Novos.
“Dunno. Perhaps a great treasure. Maybe all the misfortune in the world. Probably nothing. Dillium gave it to me months ago.” He continues manhandling it, pushing, prodding, tapping, and so on.
Zander comes over and plops down next to Novos. “Can I have a go?”
“Sure.” Novos hands the box over to Zander, who takes it gingerly in his large rough hands. After a minute or two of working with it to no avail, he hands it over to a beckoning Arthur who seems to have seen something the others missed. He didn’t. Atticus and Mar both have a go before Pocky takes a turn. In three deft moves, the box is opened, revealing an empty space in the middle, roughly large enough for three large silver coins stacked on top of each other. He shrugs as he hands it back to Novos.
With a sigh, Novos starts trying to close the box.
*** “Many generations ago, when but a babe my own great-grandsire’s great-grandsire was, did Callarduran Smoothands of a king tell us. When nigh was the time would he arise. Half of a golden crown he gave us, and a tomb of a great warrior king showed he us. When greatest was our need, take our half of the golden crown to the tomb we are to do, and with the other half reunite it. Drawing close the time is. Our enemies the tomb have discovered we fear. The other half of the crown have they stolen. Taken our birthright, they have. The other half of the crown return to us?” [3]
Dillium recognizes Callarduran Smoothands from a lecture that seemed to last forever, but probably was just before lunchtime. Callarduran is the god of the Svirfneblin, and is held in high regard—perhaps more so than the head of the gnomish pantheon, Garl Glittergold [4].
“Who are these enemies?” Felicity asks.
“Evil ones they are. From us they rob. Our people they kill. Monsters they are.”
An older gnome arrives from the darkness. He is wearing dark armor, and carrying a soft bag made of what appears to be moss. The eldest reaches into the bag and withdraws an arc of gold. It certainly appears to be what you’d expect half a tiara or head band to look like, but it is nearly entirely devoid of ornamentation or decoration. The full crown must be rather plain indeed. Dismissing the trio with a “Think on your words we will,” Felicity, Dillium, Warren (the guide), and Ser Reginald the gnome are escorted from the hall and out of Samek.
Ser Reginald greets them as friends, and chatters through much of the trek up to the surface. He says he is one of a very few remaining ‘royal escorts,’ first named soon after Callarduran Smoothands gave them their half of the crown. They have, over many many many many many many generations (he was unable to count them all), been responsible for guarding the crown and preparing for the arrival of the king. He’s fought the evil ones, and admitted to hunting and killing them in their beds, but would not give a physical description of them. He also admitted that he knew precisely where the tomb was, but had never been inside, “as the time was not yet to hand.”
Finally, they reach the doorway to the outside. With a warning to shield their eyes lest they be struck blind by the sun, Ser Reginald leads the group out to find the rest of the party scrambling to their feet. To the consternation of Ser Reginald, they take the time to break camp, saddle their beasts, and mount up. Ser Reginald wants nothing to do with the horses, so the party creeps along at gnomish walking pace. It is quite possibly the slowest escort quest ever.
Several hours later, the group approaches yet another clearing when they everyone hear a loud rumbling WHOMP! Everyone recognizes it as the sound of rocks falling inside a cave or building. Ahead, a cloud of dust pours out of a cut stone entrance into a hill. “We need to get a move on. The evil ones are already inside!” cries Ser Reginald.
Leaving the horses and asses outside, the party enters the main hall. Arthur asks Atticus to remain with Pocky and the animals, but Mar accompanies the group inside. The moderately sized room has two doorways, though both appear to have been blocked by the recent rock movement. A few minutes of contemplation leads Arthur to believe that one side would take considerable effort to unblock, while the other could be done rather quickly. As he gets to work, the others take in their surroundings. Just inside the door is a carving in an archaic form of common that says “Allies Over Enemies”. Zander notes that there is some indication that there is a test, and one of the mostly broken archways has the word ‘Wit’ carved above it. Felicity notes that according to the archaic writing, there are two tests inside. Dillium is drawn to the faded frescos, though they tend to depict war and destruction.
Soon enough Arthur has the passageway cleared well enough, and the party groups up to go into a large room. The door slides shut smoothly behind them, though there is a door on the far side. Arthur inspects it, “just in case” it is unlocked. It isn’t. The room is more or less devoid of decoration or ornamentation, but there are four columns, one each corner of the room. Novos looks at the column, but fails to note that each side has a letter on it. He does see that he can turn the column one quarter turn, so he does. Once it turns, it refuses to turn again. Members of the party spread out to try to understand the test. Someone notices that there is a small mark on the wall beside each column, but it takes everyone writing down the letters on each column before someone decides to make an effort to coordinate. Arthur suggests that since each column contains an “L”, they should turn the L’s toward the center. Novos points out that he can’t turn the column any further, but Zander turns another column easily. Mar turns another one. As Novos leans up against his column, it turns. The party realizes that the columns can be turned to spell words, and Mar identified the word that was spelled out when they entered. This gets the group going, and with some tactics employed, spell out a word that they hope will open the door. As the last column clicks into place, the door opens smoothly.
The doorway leads to a huge cavern with a five-foot wide natural stone bridge crossing what appears to be a deep, wide chasm. The cavern is pitch black, and while there might be some air movement, the ceiling is too far above and the floor of the chasm too far below to see. The party sets up a marching order with Arthur in the lead and Novos in the rear. Dillium Lights up her staff so that the humans can see and they set out. Ten or fifteen paces across, the party is surprised to come under attack by arrows and javelins. Everyone dodges out of the way of the poorly thrown darts, but one strikes home. No one can see where the javelins came from, or whether it is some sort of trap or if they were thrown. Unfortunately, no one notices that one of the party members has fallen off the stone bridge, either. At the other end of the bridge is a door that opens easily, and everyone makes it into a small foyer. Except for Felicity, who lies at the bottom of the chasm, nearly impaled by a stalagmite. [5] Novos disappears and makes his way to the bottom of the chasm where he finds Felicity and feeds her his last healing potion. Zander pulls out his Wonderous Figurine and activates it. A good-sized wyvern appears on the bridge. He tells it to go down into the chasm and bring back the human. He might have said ‘woman’ but the stone wyvern doesn’t know the difference anyway. It takes off and glides down into the chasm below, and when it finds a human, the wyvern grabs it with his sharp claws and brings it back up to Zander. Novos picks himself up, dusts himself off, and winces at the fresh puncture wounds. Zander, a little annoyed, tells the wyvern to go get the other one, and he does, fresh puncture wounds and all.
Meanwhile, Arthur, Dillium, Mar, and Ser Reginald continue on into a large room. The room is dominated by a huge stone in the middle, with some sort of gemstone embedded in. They also see a dog-like creature standing on the stone, with a piece of golden metal in one hand and a bow in the other. Ser Reginald shouts, “The evil one has the other half of the crown! Get it!” Arthur races forward and Smites the creature.
Mar snarls, “Gnolls. I should have known their stench. She manifests a Spiritual Weapon and attacks with it, then casts a Guiding Bolt. The gnoll, clearly outmatched, fires his bow (missing) and climbs down off the stone. By this time, Novos, Zander, and Felicity have come in (minus the wyvern). Novos speeds over to take a flanking position on the gnoll, but the recent puncture wounds from the wyvern still ache, and he misses entirely.
Around the same time, a larger group of gnolls, armored and armed with swords and axes, enter from the other side and take up positions. One of the larger ones raises his axe to cut down Novos, but one of the gnolls barks out something in a barking sort of bark. All of the gnolls stop and refrain from attacking. Except the one with the huge gash down his front from Arthur. He comes up with a sword and stabs at the air near Arthur. Dillium, likewise shouts for Arthur and Novos (and Mar) to stop.
“Who leads?” asks the female gnoll, as she wraps her shawl around her.
Zander raises his hand. “That would be me. I am the leader of Task Force Chimera.” He sheathes his sword and meets the female gnome in the middle of the room. “I am Zander Roaringhorn, from Cormyr. Perhaps you’ve heard of me?”
“Raa’ka. Ssand’r. Sand’r.” Her mouth doesn’t quite make all the sounds as she tries to get his name right. She tells Zander that they are here to fulfil a prophecy that tells of an Alpha Gnoll that will arise in their hour of need. Unfortunately, the crown is… not what they expected. Arthur climbs up on the stone and agrees that the gemstone in the middle seems to connect two pieces of a crown—there’s three pieces total, rather than the two that both the gnolls and gnomes thought.
“Give me the crown!” Ser Reginald cries. Mar snarls.
“I will not. Perhaps we should put the crown together, and then figure out what to do. It is obvious neither of us have the whole tale.” Ser Reginald, thoughtful, agrees.
“You put your piece in first, then.” He says.
“No you put yours in.” Raa’ka replies.
Arthur says, “How about you put them in together. At the same time,” clarifies when the gnolls seem unsure. He jumps down from the stone and gives Ser Reginald a boost up. Raa’ka needs no help.
Gently placing the two pieces of the crown in small cutouts in the stone that appear to be made exactly for their pieces. Ser Reginald and Raa’ka watch for a moment. “Now what?” The crown welds itself together before their eyes. The gem in the center pulses, then shines brightly. Then the whole crown sinks down into the stone. “NO!”
The room rumbles and shakes. The giant stone is cracked into pieces as Raa’ka and Ser Reginald leap to safety. As the dust swirls around and the rumbling fades away, all hear a booming voice.
“AT LAST I AM FREE!”

End of part 10.


[1] Unlike last chapter.
[2] in Chapter 8
[3] Modified slightly from Race for the Crown, Adventures of the Potbellied Kobold, by Jeff Stevens Games.
[4] The Gnomish Pantheon
[5] Remember, stalagmite “might” reach the ceiling, and stalactites hang on tite to the ceiling. Or, you can do the boring National Parks Service way of remembering.

*DRAIN XD
Hey everybody
So live in a new build (3.5 years old) and over the last week or two one of our showers has decided it's no longer going to drain very fast.
Nothing has changed Shower drain seems fine (ran unblockers through it, snakes etc) The weirdest thing is without the waste, drainage isn't an issue whatsoever. Waste seems fine, again, nothing changed.
Anyone got any idea what the hell is going on?
SOLVED! Bit of a plunge and a long ole' snake pushed through something and now looks like we're good. Thanks everybody for all the advice!

made this for my narrative essay in american literature, but one of my friends said i should share the story
“But I Still Need You” Throughout my life, I had always fallen easy for girls. The elementary mindset of, “she’s cute, so I have a crush on her,” prevented me from developing a legitimate relationship with any girl I tried to talk to. The few times that my feelings were reciprocated, I had no idea because I was already on to the next girl, and this continued until I was left with a multitude of friend-zone situations and a list of “crushes.” My charisma already lacking, it seemed each year that passed, previous to 3rd grade, I grew in weight and therefore awkwardness. The struggle to interact with women lessened as I grew up, while the fat remained. So, by the 8th grade I was the ideal guy friend; easy to talk to, kinda funny, understanding, and unintimidating. My approachable “funny fat friend” nature had its ups and downs. While guys, for reasons I still don’t fully understand, suspected me to be gay, girls found it intriguing and it made them want to be friends with me more. Back then I didn’t know, but now I know that by being forced to be friends first, after finding out I was in fact not gay, the right woman for me would want to be with me for my personality. In the winter of 2021, I fell hard for a girl named Madeline. Maddie was no different than many of the other girls in that she had a bland personality and I thought she was cute. She had brunette hair with bangs, big glasses, way too much makeup on, and a unique fashion sense. Her sense of fashion was one of the few interesting things about her, yet it was disregarded by the public. Not too many guys found her appealing, but I did, for whatever reason. I was dead set on getting to know her better in hope of becoming more than friends. Unfortunately, she hardly paid attention to me, but I didn’t give up. I merely slowed down because of my interest in her friend, Isabella. Isabella is the Spanish and Italian variation of Elizabeth (derived from the Hebrew name Elisheba). The meaning of Elishiba can be translated to, “God is my oath.” In Arabic, the beginning of Isabella, “Isa,” is the classical Arabic name for Jesus, while in the French language, the shortened version of Isabella, “Belle,” translates to “beautiful.” I had met Isabella in the sixth grade, and grew a tiny crush on her, in the elementary sense, before we all went into hibernation (COVID). I barely knew her though, and she had no idea who I was, so when we interacted in my last two classes, if we did at all, it was like two strangers who kept running into each other. I sat by her in my sixth period, and one seat up and to the right from her in seventh. We only ever made small talk and the occasional joke, but when I spoke with her I felt content. Still barely knowing her, all I could admire was the little things in the way she laughed and spoke. I longed to know more about Isabella, she was mature, intelligent, and very opinionated, but still light-hearted and made time pass at the speed of light. It wasn’t until she was in my group in sixth period one day that she began to open up a little by sharing the details of her current long-distance relationship. The shards of my heart stabbed and crushed my stomach; hope, the oxygen to my mind, depleted faster than the air of a broken space shuttle; palpitation, nausea, asphyxia, and neurosis bombarded me like Persian arrows on the Greeks. Then, all at once, the excruciating tidal wave evaporated, but instead of calm waters, I was left with a drought. Every emotion muted or gone, my body went numb while everything I cared for vanished from my mind. I didn’t speak throughout the rest of that day, and went directly from the bus to decaying in my bed. I was devastated, so I retreated to my pointless crush on Maddie. Unrelated to the rather sad lovelife, my anxiety and depression worsened throughout 8th grade, and while I was going to therapy, most of my issues wouldn’t and still haven’t been worked through. Throughout the school year I had developed a toxic system of self pity, in which I would spend hours a day cycling through the feelings of hope, anger, and despair- never that of joy. I knew what I was doing, gathering enough hope to face the school day just before I reflected on the doubts and grievances going on throughout my life. I’d bring myself up just for a greater fall because honestly, overtime I became numb to the natural pain. If I were going to fall into the pit that is depression, the higher I peaked in terms of optimism the more excruciating the freefall of nausea and the heavy flow of salt water. At that point in my life, I saw no point in getting out of bed to do anything, school or even my own mother’s birthday. By the end of eighth grade I had spent almost a total of six weeks absent, two of which were from me being quarantined. Typically over the span of one or two days, others up to four, I would be in my bed “sick.” During these mini-vacations I would sleep all morning, if my mom let me, and stay up all night, oftentimes listening to Radiohead or Cigarettes After Sex while staring at my ceiling. I wanted to stay up, I wanted to feel the bags grabbing and pulling towards my cheekbone, I wanted to feel empty, emotionally and physically. During the day, my anxiety attacks became panic attacks and I would get sent home for vomiting. I'd throw up to give Mom a reason to let me stay home. I’d throw up to feel something, anything. I’d throw up to keep my stomach empty. I’d throw up because I had to, because the nerves and overthinking forced me to. Every morning, I’d drag my black air force ones across cement, carpet, tiles, and marble, each step leading towards Mrs. Clements’ homeroom. For every step, a different worry or insecurity flashed through my brain. But then, out of the blue, I’m “Lincoln” again. I walk into homeroom with an ear-to-ear grin and dap up “the boys”. I’d spend the morning building up hopes of making Isabella laugh today, or maybe calling her once I got home, but I knew that nine times out of ten my hopes were delusional. To “Lincoln,” this was no problem, he would make a gay joke, join the boys with teasing a cute girl in my class, and laugh until just for a moment, the despair was gone. Finally, the sixth period would come and I’d get to see Isabella. In here I got the least work done out of all my classes as I would find myself strategically planning my next interaction with her, just for said plans to go out the window when I was brought face to face with her. Typically seventh period followed the same pattern except Ms. Shirley Davis could never allow small talk in her classroom. When the last bell rang, I went straight to the buses. I’d sleep on the way home, dreaming of a call that would hardly happen. On the off chance my phone didn’t reach its feared 11th cry, we’d talk for hours at a time. On a weekday or not, it seemed that, when we did call, it was guaranteed to go into the early morning. It’s hard to put my finger on a specific topic, or even general. In our conversations, we discussed anything and everything. Everything, except her own love interest. I admired this, as my inability to keep who I’m thinking about at the time a secret is a major flaw of mine. The more that me and her spoke, the more I grew to love her. Our talks were so honest, so raw, that the secret I held began to eat away at me. My core collapsing like a dying star, each day it felt like the pain got worse. To cope with the feelings I had buried deep inside me, I’d turn to my friends. At first, they said to come forward with my feelings, but I knew that’s what any friend would’ve said. The relief I got from venting the conflicting hurricane within me was brief. Overtime, their words of encouragement turned to annoyance, and understandably so. When people grew sick of the same old sadistic untold love, I turned to Isabella. I wrote a text so full that, to read it, one needed to tap on an arrow at the bottom right corner of my message. The essay was compiled with the confliction I had, developing feelings for a friend, and the sorrow that filled me each day that passed without her. I described the perfect imperfections that I admired about her, how life was complete when I spoke to her, the beauty that paralyzed me every time I saw her in person, and the character that I felt God had curated specifically for me. Sitting there unsure if I should press send, a fear grew within my chest that Isabella would see right through me. I could hear the music that so often triggered tears; the vocals of Thom Yorke or the beats of Kanye West, they faded in and out. What if she didn’t even respond? What if she thought I was a creep? What if- then she responded. Suddenly, the ominous 808s & Heartbreak pounding vanished, my respiratory chaos became paralyzed, and time stood still. I couldn’t breathe until I finished reading, and once I did, my sigh was all but relieving. Isabella explained to me how unhealthy my habits were; even in comparison to the anguish that would follow, I’d suffer far more and far longer should I suppress my emotions. She told me how that level of affection, in the context of the warped concept of romance most men had, was something she had only dreamt of. Isabella said that holding these feelings would eat away at me, exponentially increasing in severity, until I broke. Not only would I be hurting myself, but I would be depriving the person I care about most from the appreciation they deserve. I became bloated with fear of the friendzone, those insecurities, all based upon inference, became a reality with Isabella’s last piece of advice. She said, “If she doesn’t reciprocate those emotions, then don’t worry. I’m sure there’s a girl out there who can appreciate your compassion.” The blame had no other place to go than my shoulders, after all, I got what I asked for, advice on another girl. Isabella, even if she saw the crush I had on her, is far too kind to address it. She cared for everyone, and to her, she was merely boosting up a friend who’s down. For the rest of the night her text echoed through my mind; pain, regret, and admiration caused my mind to sporadically leap from conclusion to conclusion. Two years later, those words still haunt me, reiterations of that phrase torturing me when I least expect them. The school year progressed, but my aspirations with Isabella didn’t. Over time, the frequency of my writings grew to be weekly, at times reaching two a week, and the weight of my confessions depleted. I opened my audience to a mutual friend of Isabella’s, Miley, with the intention of acquiring useful advice. Eventually, my choice to try concealing what I felt for Isabella became too heavy of a burden, weighing down on me in forces I had not endured before. Soon, the love I had for Isabella turned to hatred for myself. I was relentlessly criticizing every aspect of myself and my mind. I hated how fat I was, my smile, my voice, my laugh, and most of all my personality. What I had thought was my greatest strength, was revealed as my worst trait. The gullibility I exhibited when thinking for a second Isabella could possibly like me; the lack of confidence that caused me to chicken out of confessing my feelings to her; my insufferable need to make people laugh; the hyperfixation I would develop for those that I love. Everything about me was wrong. I stopped eating, stopped sleeping, stopped caring, and eventually I stopped living. The “Lincoln” my friends had grown to recognize, the only remnant of the joy I felt when I was younger, died, and I was left with only my love for Isabella and resentment for myself. I began testing the limits of what was left of me, praying for relief. At first in the middle of the night, an anaconda would find its way to my throat, wrapping around my neck. Its cold black scales gracefully gliding across my skin before silencing my cries with the swift tug of its metallic USB head. The snake would maintain pressure until I let go of it, the entire time whispering into my ear, begging me to hold on. Some nights it came with what must have been a full stomach for it was drastically wider, it was brown these nights, with leather skin, and a slight warmth, but it behaved the same. Most visits from the snake ended with my vision blurry, my breath short, or my head dizzy. The only consistency of our transactions was Asia’s Death Lake that streamed down my face from start to finish. Eventually, the snake seemed closer and closer to silencing me forever, but I also became used to its visits. I began writing letters to everyone I loved so that, should the snake come out victorious, they’d have a final goodbye. Once I had sorted out my notes, I called the snake to my room. This time it came striped with shades of blue, its skin a soft fabric. For once, I controlled the snake, because our intentions finally aligned. I locked the door, sent out my texts, placed the written notes on my dresser, and joined the snake at my closet door. Holding onto the doorknob, the snake wrapped itself around my neck just as it had done in nights of the past. It whispered to me, “let go,” for I had been on my knees in hesitation. I followed the snake’s order by making a sort of plank with my body, the bottom half resting on a stack of dirty laundry and pillows while the top was supported by my elbows. Pressure swiftly fell down on my neck and didn’t stop. “This is it,” I thought to myself. My eyes seemed to pop out of my skull, and my tears, falling down like summer rain, became blurry dots as my vision went dark. Next thing I know, I’m waking up, snot, saliva, and tears strung between my face and the carpet floor. My head pounding and my eyes burning, I looked up at the “snake” that was the tie my mom had gotten me for Sunday service. Although my mind was more clear, it was not out of revelation, but from a muted sense of the world around me. Other than Isabella, nothing mattered anymore, and the little emotion I felt was squashed by my immortal love. The following day I get called to the counselors office on charges of suicidal thoughts and self harm. I said what I had to in order to escape her grasp, but left infuriated. Not only had my own friends betrayed me, but the lady who was supposed to guide me essentially scolded me for being sad. Throughout the day my anger faded out and my focus became making an excuse as to why my parents got a weird call from my counselor, then I’d find the traitor who sold me out. That afternoon, I lost two friends, and for the first time ever got mad at Isabella. Apparently, Miley, Maddie, and Isabella all reported me to the counselor that morning. They said I had been traumatizing them with what was going on in my life, being normal and messing around at school, then detailing my thoughts and actions to them outside of school. I felt like I had been tricked. I thought they were my friends. I thought they understood me. They asked me if I was okay, they said they wanted, cared, needed to know, but now I had scared them? I addressed what had happened with Miley first. She immediately lashed out at me, saying I should be thanking them, not be mad. While I didn’t want to accept it, I understood the core of her choices. On the other hand, Maddie’s response to my confrontation was disgustingly cruel. She said I had been unfair and just seeking attention, that no thirteen to fourteen year old should hear about what I was going through because it was unnatural. Before she continued, I apologized, that’s all I could think to do, because deep down I believed her. She told me it wasn’t all my fault because my brain was messed up, and that opening up to the girls would only make them not want to be friends with me. The one word that rang through my head then, and still does today, was “creep,” she claimed that what I felt wasn’t love, but I was just mentally unstable and creepy. Any remnants of the sweet kid from elementary school who just wanted a friend and loved everyone were obliterated. Maddie was right, all I had done was hurt and scare them, it didn’t matter what I thought. I told her all I could, that I didn’t know what to say other than I was sorry for the damage I had done, and I would try and get better. Her response, like a branding iron on my mind, was, “It’s not damage, it’s baggage. Imagine if the roles were reversed.” It was only then that I stopped texting back. I wish I could say it was out of frustration or self respect, but the reality of my manipulative traits is what silenced me. Shockingly, the response that hurt the most was from Isabella, yet it somehow meant the most to me too. Isabella told me that she needed me in the world. She told me that if I ever got those thoughts again, to think about her as well; to think about the pain I’d be causing her; to think about the trauma she’d live with for the rest of her life. After repeating the phrase, “I need you in my life,” she acknowledged how selfish it was, but still didn’t care. Isabella continued elaborating, she didn’t care because no label of selfishness outweighed the value of my life. What she said that night has been vivid in my mind since, but my only wish is that she had needed me as I needed her. Tears began to hide my freckled cheeks as I texted her about how much her words meant to me, how much she meant to me, and I apologized to her. I said sorry for the baggage I caused, the “creepy” behavior, and any other ways I had wronged her. I said sorry for loving her, and told her I’d do better. She disregarded my apologies, telling me that I could always talk to her because no matter the baggage she could carry, it’d be worth taking the smallest bit off of me. Her words meant so much to me, yet hurt me just the same. I hated myself for it. I couldn’t see a life without an affection for her, it was pathetic. If I truly loved her, I’d let my feelings go, right? What kind of person did that make me? Summer came and went. Hoping that time would kill the crush I had on Isabella, I prohibited myself from contacting her. Instead I spent time with my family and a few friends, but Isabella never left my head. Even when accompanying my dad to Berry College for the Governor’s Honors Program, she’s what filled my head. At first I felt frustrated because before I had come forward to her, she had known about the feelings I had. I came to the conclusion that she had been dragging me along, but even then I knew how easily that thought would be abandoned. First day of High school, I got in touch with her. For maybe two weeks, I maintained a platonic relationship before free falling into the ominous pit once again. This time felt different though, it felt like what I had thought about everyday, for what seemed eternity, could be more than a daydream. We texted each other throughout the school day and facetimed after her cheer practice and my band practice. Eventually, Isabella was falling asleep on call. Before, we’d talk long into the night, and it began to drain the energy out of the both of us. Now, we were listening to music, playing Roblox, watching Netflix, or just sitting in silence. I had never felt comfortable with silence, but she made it seem better than having a conversation with anyone else. It’s a beautiful thing when words aren’t required to appreciate someone. The moment I had the courage to do so, I asked her out to Steak n’ Shake. It’s just my luck that the restaurant was hardly a shell of what I remembered as a kid. At first the conversation was awkward because we hardly spoke in person, but as time progressed so did we. I still remember the tightness of my cheeks as I failed to suppress my ear-to-ear grin. The euphoric nausea and beating heart that disappeared throughout our conversation. I remember the booth we sat in, the fact that she wanted me to swap seats with her because of her creaky seat, the way she giggled, how I fought tooth and nail to pay for such a small bill, the way she smiled when she said, “next time you’ve gotta let me pay,” and the shared excitement for our next hangout. Even though Isabella and I were still friends, even though the restaurant was a disaster, even though the fries were stale and the milkshakes chunky, that moment is one of the best in my life. With how well things were going, I thought that it was my best chance at making something more out of this friendship. So, I shot my shot. I told her that despite my efforts the summer before, she still held a special place in my heart. Isabella responded with her own struggles with recovering from a past relationship, detailing the trust issues and pain she still felt almost a year later. I was yet again, devastated. Then she added that despite her own feelings, she had to be careful and the risk of losing our friendship scared her. I understood her reasoning, but it made me sick to think of how close I was. In response, I expressed how I could relate to those feelings, and the conflict I had with them. It felt ridiculous having opened myself up once again, to just be friendzoned. Her response struck me with both hope and devastation, “I f*cking love you a ton Lincoln, but I’m struggling to differentiate my admiration as a friend and as something more. I’m terrified of losing you.” Previously I would have seen this as a sign to keep trying, but at that moment, I couldn’t see past the blatant friendzoning. After pursuing her for so long, it felt cruel of her to continue dragging me along like this, even though she was being honest. My reaction to the straw that broke the camel’s back is one of, if not, the biggest regrets in life. Homecoming was a little over a week away and she was going (as friends) with my buddy, Davis, so in a storm of hatred for myself and the situation I was in, I gave up on her. Our conversations grew to be minimal and far apart. Soon, I started to resent her. Each day since then, I have somehow felt more remorse than the last for not asking her to Homecoming. Homecoming night is when I began flirting with Claire, a sweet redhead from gym class. We connected on not going with the person we had hoped for. All it took was me joking that I should’ve spent more time around her, instead of leaving the dance early, for Claire to lose her mind. Over the next month or so, I was becoming closer and closer with Claire, despite her irritable “quirks”. I only spoke to Isabella if she reached out to me first with the only exception being when I would ask her for “advice” about Claire, which was a shameful habit I started as petty revenge on Isabella. Eventually, Isabella blocked me on Snapchat, but it didn’t matter. Things with me and Claire were going great, she made me feel like I didn’t need to starve myself to be good enough for her. She made me feel like I was enough. For the next two and a half months, life was great. After the first couple months of ignorant bliss, I was sick of her. Sure, there were a variety of reasons to find her annoying, most people I knew could list more than they have fingers and toes, but she didn’t do anything wrong. I shouldn’t have gotten into the relationship in the first place not only because of Isabella, but also the speed at which me and Claire started dating. She was still growing out of the elementary relationship phase, so while it was nice to connect with someone so quickly, it was rushed. Another issue being that I was her first real boyfriend, the baggage that followed me was detrimental to her and I couldn’t give her the attention she needed. As me and Claire began our month long drift apart, I was unblocked by Isabella. She and I caught up, and we quickly began to talk trash about Claire while on call. It was unbelievably toxic, and I’m embarrassed of how I handled things to this day. Eventually, with the support of Isabella, I decided it was time to break up. The only issue was the guilt I had in such a terrible choice, I could never do it. So I began to get more distant by the day, ignored texts and calls, and stopped walking her to classes because “I had to pee.” Eventually she caught wind of my plans and called me after school one day. Sobbing, she told me what she had heard and how she knew it wasn’t true, but it still worried her. I began to get ready to break the news, but she was already crying so what's the worst that could happen? I wish I had never asked myself that, because next she told me she’d been cutting herself. My heart sank in remorse for what I knew I would do. If I led her on longer, the aftermath of my cold actions would lead to even more catastrophe. I was scared, but knew the lesser of the two evils I had to pick from. I calmed her down, quickly notified her friends to be keeping an eye on her, and then dumped her. To this day, I am disgusted by my actions. Throughout the past three months, Claire expressed how she had loved and trusted me, yet I threw that all away. There are so many ways I could’ve handled the situation differently, but two stood out the most. Showing respect by speaking to Claire the moment I realized my feelings had fleeted was the bare minimum that I disregarded, but the second was far simpler. I had known from the start that I was still in love with Isabella and that love never faded, but was only suppressed. The entire relationship we developed, while we both enjoyed parts of it (her more than me), was a lie, and essentially a cruel joke played on Claire. There’s no excuse for my actions, and even worse, I could’ve cared less back then. It was only when time had passed that I began to understand the damage I had done. Without Claire holding me back, my newfound freedom led to a closer friendship with Isabella. I dove headfirst into the familiar pit all over again. A friendship was not enough, I appreciated every interaction I had with Isabella, but my life depended on a future with her. It’s likely she felt this as she slowly began to drift away from me. Before I had stayed up speaking to Isabella, but now I couldn’t sleep out of the tormenting absence of her voice. The only path to good health was time; distance was best for the both of us, and I knew it. For the rest of that school year, everything around me was going, but I stood still. It was like my life was just a sitcom, and I was no longer the main character. The summer that followed was just the same, I was living but dead, moving but still, speaking but silent. I was dissociating from my friends and family, but the absence of that violent snake made my depression insignificant. Living a life without her was more punishment than death itself, and I didn’t deserve relief. Even now, I think of that summer and remember almost nothing, for my life isn’t worth remembering without Isabella in it. Sophomore year began, and so did my conversations with Isabella. This go around, I was subtle with my feelings for her. The excitement I had for speaking with her was under control, but it was because the spark inside me had faded, even when it came to Isabella.The years of self pity and depression had left a toll on me that could never be reversed, and it didn’t help that Isabella began to build a relationship with another guy. When we spoke, if we did, Isabella’s concern for my mental state outweighed the friendship we were struggling to preserve. I had come to the conclusion that pursuing Isabella would only make things worse, and I needed to just be her friend. Since I couldn’t lose the feelings I had for her, I just sat in them. While I sat in the pit, Isabella and I had one particular Facetime call in which I brought up how much I regretted dating Claire. To that, Isabella added, “Yeah, she’s so annoying. I can’t remember if you told me why you got together in the first place, what led you to her?” I paused with the thousand-yard stare of an American private fresh out of West Point. “I guess I was just so disappointed with myself for not being able to go to homecoming with you and being stuck on you for so long that I impulsively got with another girl to forget about my shortcomings,” I said with reluctance and stuttering every few words. She told me that she would’ve said yes to homecoming without a second thought, but I knew she meant as friends. Then, to my dismay, Isabella revealed that whenever I got with Claire, she still had feelings for me. It was me talking to Isabella about how great things were with me and Claire that led her to block me and cut contact with me. The piano melody from “No Surprises” by Radiohead began looping through my mind as tears ran down my face. I forget how I ended the call, but once I did, I broke. I lost my breath, my head got light, my eyes became blurry, my stomach was nauseous, and my insides sank as far as they could. Everything I wanted, dreamed of, needed had been so close, and I blew it. Everything was my fault. Later I would ask her why she lost them, and her answer proved how much better she was than me. Isabella answered, “I had been hurt, so I moved on. Just got over it.” We hardly spoke anymore, but one text message has found a permanent home in my mind. After asking me how I was, Isabella wasn’t satisfied with, “it’s complicated.” She asked that I explain it to her so that she could try to understand. I told her about all the issues going on in my life, except the torch I still held for her. She wrote, “I know you’re not religious, so it may not mean anything, but I pray for you every night, Lincoln. Even though it sounds bad, I think that I've known you weren’t in the greatest mental place for a while. I want you to know I'm not judging you, I want you to feel comfortable enough to share that with someone. You have to be able to recognize how you’re feeling in order to even fix it.” These words broke me despite their simplistic appearance. Reading that she prayed for me hit me hard as she had always tried to get me to believe in God again. I’m agnostic, and nothing has come closer to bringing me back to faith as Isabella did. The idea that if God were real and I could see her in heaven was appealing, but should Christianity be the wrong choice, I wanted to be wrong with Isabella. In the following days, Isabella told me about Alex, a guy she had been talking to a lot, and how they were at most a month away from being together. I hated everything about Alex, which is a stupid name in the first place. I hated his choice of friends, I hated how white-washed he was, I hated how he dressed like a conservative cowboy, I hated the underbite that made him look like a pug, I hated his short curly hair, I hated the fact that he was a diehard Trump supporter while people of his race were being oppressed, I hated how he pretended to be someone else when he was around Isabella, I hated how he hid unhealthy habits from her, I hated that a guy like him garnered Isabella’s affection when I couldn’t. I barely knew the guy and I was wasting my energy with hatred for him, when in reality, he was just a mind-numbingly basic douche among the hundreds just like him at our school. Isabella regularly complained about Alex, but hardly did anything. Instead she stopped bringing it up, saying that talking about her issues with others only makes it worse and that she was just wining. The monotone delivery of her reasoning hurt my soul, it was like she was reciting a text from Alex. Each day that passed, I felt the urgency of expressing my feelings one more time rising. Soon Isabella and Alex would be official, and I would lose my chance to try and express how I felt one more time. I reached out to Isabella and asked if she was free to hangout that friday. On November 10, 2023, Isabella picked me up around 5:30 in the evening. She kept the inside of her SUV looking brand new in contrast to the familiarity of her smile. My nerves left me winded after every sentence and shivering in her passenger seat. Quickly our conversation became more natural as I cracked jokes to ease my anxiety, but my shaky breathing never stopped. We went to Publix to grab some snacks and drinks and headed right back to my neighborhood park. At the Grove Point Park, we found a swinging chair to sit in. Due to the time of the year, the sun had already set, but Isabella’s beauty was indifferent under the moonlight. I haven’t the slightest clue how long we sat there together. When I’m with Isabella, even Father Time gives me grace, for he knows that he is as powerless as I am to the frequency of these moments. After a while, I mentioned that it was getting late and she agreed. On the ride back to my place, I mustered the bare minimum of strength it took to confront my feelings. As she drove over the speed bump before entering the roundabout, I began to open up. I briefly told her that I still felt the same way I did two years ago, that I had tried to forget about the feelings I had with no success, and that I was sorry to once again ruin our unstable friendship. She told me it was fine and my feelings were natural, nothing to regret or be ashamed of. Her words meant nothing to me this time because I had already heard them. Defeated, I paused for a moment, then said, “Isabella, you reciprocated my feelings in the past, so after Alex, do you think that maybe we’d have a chance?” She looked at me with pain in her eyes, not for herself, but for me. She quietly said, “I- Lincoln, you know I can’t answer that. I’m with Alex now, it wouldn’t be fair.” All I could get out was, “Oh- I- I’m sorry. Uh yeah no, you’re uh- you’re right.” Everything in me pulled and begged at my lips to say what I wanted to, but I couldn’t. I still look back on that night and wish I had said the few words I never got to tell her. What if saying them could’ve changed something? Realistically, it wouldn’t have, but the regret remains. I doubt Isabella would have even remembered where my word choice stemmed from. Regardless, the words rang in my head then, and never stopped. All I wanted to say at that moment was, “but I still need you.” Today, 1,725 days since I first saw Isabella, 822 days since I first facetimed Isabella, and 178 days since that heartbreakingly beautiful night, I still love her the same. Looking back on my experience with her, I regret many things (oversharing, Claire, the snake, etc.), but the one thing I have never regretted was meeting and loving her. It was only recently that I realized that loving her has been one of the biggest mistakes in my life. For three years, day in and day out, I’ve thought about her. Three years where I could have met other people, worked on myself, enjoyed my friends and family, but instead I’ve loved her and nothing, nobody else. The one lesson that was essential for me to take away from my experience was impossible. In eighth grade I was 5’7 and 215 lbs, today I’m 5’10 and 165 lbs. In eighth grade I spent time with my parents, today I hide in my room. In eighth grade, I told people how I felt, now I’m too scared. In eighth grade, I talked about my depression, now I am left alone to deal with it. In eighth grade, I had many friends, now I rarely speak to them. In eighth grade, I needed Isabella, but the one lesson I should’ve learned never took effect. I still need her.

Bought a 1960s house in mid-March. Moved in around 4/1. By 4/15 our toilet was clogged up and had to have a guy out to unblock the main sewer line. We've got clay pipes. I asked when the plumbing had been updated but wasnt specific enough I guess- as I was under the impression the pipes had been replaced (and were no longer clay) in 2018, but apparently that's when they replaced the sinks and faucets- nothing with the pipes 🙃
Before the first clog we could hear gurgles when we flushed, and the first time I ran the washer it smelled real nasty. Our kitchen sink started backing up the other day and I snaked it, and it's been fine since. But the gurgles have returned when we flush or do laundry.
The dude who did the main line clog clean out said he's sure we've got roots. I dont doubt that. He left the clean out cap loose and I just walked by there and it's apparently done a bit of cleaning itself out. As there's some nasty on my garden hose.
Is there anything I can do to buy myself some time? Like I said I just bought this house- and it's our first- so we pulled just about everything we had for the down payment.
I'm gonna get the dude to come back and scope it so I know what I'm dealing with- but I'm just trying to mentally prepare and see what my options might be

Ok , so this is going to be a long one as these events unfolded in about a year or so.
I am a 15 year old female. Lets call my ex Kent . Kent honestly used to be a fun person to be around but then suddenly he decided that he didn't want to come to school. His reasons on why he did it change every time someone asks him. First it was "Oh I oversleep" next it was "My parents wont let me " then it was "I don't like school" it went on for months. We were still dating at the time and I was very concerned for him. However anytime I tried to tell him something related to school he would get super offended and call me stupid and ghost me for hours or days until I apologized.
Me and my best friend (Lets call her Maya) were both close with Kent . There was this other girl (Lets call her Sarah). Sarah used to attend school with us last year and me and Maya both suspected that she had a thing for Kent. She would talk about Kent so much that even her mom thought that they were together. Obviously she would deny it when asked but she gets so defensive that its obvious that she wants Kent.
Kent still refused to come to school and it had been about 3 months since he had stopped coming . he had already missed one of the 4 important exams that we had in a year. Literally everybody was telling Kent he needed to get his act together except for Sarah. Sarah would go around telling everybody that "He just needs time". This was absolutely ridiculous , I mean , it had been 3 months since his first "break from school".
Kent soon became obsessed with self diagnosing himself with every mental disorder under the sun. He used google to self diagnose himself. One day he has depression , next day he has ADHD , the next day he has bipolar , the next day he has multiple personalities . This is the point where I started to resent him, He started acting super "unique" and "quirky". And everybody told him he was being weird , except for Sarah. She kept on going on about how he just needed time or something.
Kent became even more toxic after the self diagnosing thing. He started constantly threatening to break up with me . He even went to Maya once and told her that he was willing to break up with me to date her . Maya , being a literal angel , came and told me immediately. I confronted him and he said that "He was just having a bad day". God knows why I forgave him but I did. After this I was really mad at him for a while and he told Maya that he needs someone to talk to. Maya told him "You can talk to your girlfriend cant you?" .Kent said "Nah I prefer Sarah more" . I'm so lucky to have a friend like Maya who immediately tells me stuff like this.
This went on like this for months. Kent never came back to school . Anytime I would bring up school he would get mad and go "rant" to Sarah who would come and scold me for "being rude". Anytime I would even talk about friends from school he would be like "Oh , that person?? Yeah they are a snake" even if he's never talked to them before. There was a really funny case where I was talking about a good friend of mine to him and he said something like "Oh, them?? Don't you know? She heart Maya really badly". Maya has never once spoken to this girl.
Anytime me and Maya would try to do something on our own he would have to try to join in. One time me and Maya were in a call talking about school . Kent begs to be added to the call so we agree and add him. When he realizes we are talking about school he gets all "Oh , your trying to exclude me." and "No its fine , I'll just cry myself to sleep". That must be his favorite line cause my god . Once I was having a sleepover with Maya on New Year's Eve and I told him about it . He went all "Why didn't you tell me" And "Oh don't worry about me , I'll just cry myself to sleep".
The last straw was when I was playing a game alone . He kept joining my game. I was annoyed so I pretended not to see him because everyone knows , you cant say no to Kent. I told Maya and she offered to join my game to make it look like we were playing together . I agreed and we hopped on a call and chatted while playing the game. The second Kent noticed that Maya was in the game with me he started begging to join the call. We just ignored his messages and he pulled out his classic "I'm going to cry myself to sleep" after spam calling us 18 times. Maya told him we honestly didn't care and to leave us alone. So can you guess who Kent goes to ? That's right Sarah. Sarah told Maya that we were horrible people for excluding Kent like that causing him to self harm. I rolled my eyes because Kent always says he self harmed but he never actually does it. Maya knows this too as she was laughing fit while reading the messages. Also who self harms cause people don't want to play a game without you?
I try to explain everything to Sarah but she doesn't budge. She goes all "You guys are so rude to him for no reason". So then I messaged Kent and told him to stop spreading rumors' about me and Maya. He basically said that he wasn't trying to spread rumors' . Apparently Sarah had told him to tell her if he self harms so he did that. I bluntly stated that his self harm was a manipulation tactic and I'd really like to see if there are actually any scars on his body. If you're wondering how I'm so sure he doesn't self harm , it's because the reasons he gives for self harming are really stupid , example is the game situation.
I eventually get fed up and block Kent . I wake up the next morning and guess what I see, A post of Kent and Sarah hanging out the day after we broke up. At this point I literally didn't care at all for those two so I asked Sarah how her date was. She tried to play it all like I was misunderstanding the situation. I tell her that I know that she has liked Kent for a long time. She called me jealous and I blocked her.
I thought I was done but nope. Maya tells me that Kent had been visiting Sarah's apartment recently and that Sarah's friends had given Kent a dare to go in the females restroom for ten minutes and for some reason he accepted it and for some other reason Sarah went with him. The security guard saw them but they ignored him and locked the door. The security guard went to Sarah's parents and told them everything as well as showed them the footage . The parents were really angry and demanded to look through all their chats. I don't know what they found but they demanded that Sarah cut all contact with Kent . Kent says that they misunderstood something in their messages as them doing stuff in that stall but me and Maya both think that Kent just said some sexual stuff to her and that's what made the parents mad.
Sarah has had to block Kent on everything . I don't know whether I should forgive her because we used to be really good friends before any of this. She has not apologized to me directly but told Maya that she wishes I would unblock her. But I don't think I can ever forget this side of her . For now I'm planning to go no contact with Kent and Sarah. They both say that I'm a toxic jerk and I'm "too quick to judge" but I don't care.
So all that being said , am I the jerk?

She invited me to see her i had to fly. It wasnt cheap. I can afford it, but it wasnt cheap. Before I even came to her city I did some things that she had said I wasn't to do, but i hid it all, she found out before i even bought the tickets. She promised me if i bought concert tickets all would be well and she would forgive, after the concert, she went and fucked someone else then came home and thought all was well. I did everything she asked and literally every two days she went to see other dude. I fell hard for her and spent 1000s. She asked me to do something for her, I said no. She made OUTRAGEOUS promises if I spent another $1000. I said fine fine ok. The moment I spent the money it was over. She threw me put a few days later. Now supposedly she will pay me back eventually. How fucking dumb am I to even continue talking to her lol. Like on the one hand she incredible, but on the other i think I'd trust a snake promising not to bite me again. Just can't help going unblocking to chat with her. Please tell me AITI so maybe i can just cut and run.
Just for additional info that may affect decisions we both going thru separations, in different countries and did an incredible amount of drugs. And I don't mean like we ate a few edibles. Oh and when I say I wasn't to do I don't mean fucking others. That would have been fine apparently, I know she did lol. We agreed it was fine while we apart.

Blockages in the plumbing and drainage systems of your Birmingham home can lead to inconveniences and potential damage. This article will explore the most common causes of blockages in Birmingham and offer effective solutions to address these issues. By understanding these problems and knowing how to deal with them, you can keep your home's plumbing and drainage running smoothly.

1. Kitchen Sink Blockages:

• Causes of kitchen sink blockages
• DIY solutions using natural ingredients
• Importance of regular maintenance

2. Bathroom Drain Clogs:

• Factors leading to bathroom drain blockages
• Using a plunger and drain snake
• Preventive measures

3. Toilet Blockages:

• Common toilet blockage causes
• How to use a plunger effectively
• Identifying when to call a plumber

4. Outdoor Drainage Issues:

• Causes of outdoor drainage blockages
• Clearing debris and maintaining outdoor drains
• Preventing blockages in gutters

5. Blocked Drains in the Birmingham Area:

• Localized issues and challenges
• Professional drainage services in Birmingham
• Community initiatives for maintaining clean drains

6. Safety and Environmental Considerations:

• Handling blockages in an eco-friendly way
• Proper disposal of waste from blockages
• Safety precautions while addressing blockages

7. When to Seek Professional Help:

• Signs that require the expertise of a plumber or drainage specialist
• Choosing reputable plumbing and drainage services in Birmingham

Conclusion:
Birmingham residents often face plumbing and drainage blockages, but with the right knowledge and tools, these issues can be addressed effectively. Regular maintenance and preventive measures play a crucial role in avoiding blockages, and ensuring your home remains comfortable and free from plumbing hassles. Should you encounter complex or recurring blockages, it's wise to reach out to Birmingham's professional plumbing and drainage services to maintain a smooth flow throughout your home.

A clogged toilet is undoubtedly one of the most inconvenient and unpleasant household issues that can occur. However, with the right knowledge and tools, you can handle the situation effectively without the need for a plumber. This comprehensive guide on toilet unblocking will provide you with step-by-step instructions, helpful tips, and preventive measures to tackle the issue swiftly and maintain a smoothly running toilet.

1. Identifying the Problem:

• Recognizing the signs of a blocked toilet
• Common causes of toilet blockages

2. Safety First:

• Precautions before starting the unclogging process
• Gathering the necessary tools and protective gear

3. Plunge It Away:

• Using a plunger correctly
• Understanding plunger types and techniques

4. Chemical Solutions:

• Safe use of chemical drain cleaners
• Homemade alternatives with baking soda and vinegar

5. Auger or Snake to the Rescue:

• How to use a toilet auger or snake
• Tips for success and safety

6. Prevention is Key:

• Best practices to avoid future blockages
• Regular maintenance for a trouble-free toilet

7. When to Call a Professional:

• Indications that your clog may need expert assistance
• Choosing a reliable plumber

8. Eco-Friendly Unclogging Methods:

• Environmentally conscious approaches to unblocking your toilet
• Reducing chemical usage and waste

9. Final Thoughts:

• The satisfaction of successfully unblocking a toilet
• Maintaining a clean and efficient toilet system

Conclusion:

With the information provided in this guide, you'll be well-prepared to handle toilet blockages with confidence, from identifying the issue to choosing the right tools and techniques. Moreover, you'll discover eco-friendly alternatives and preventative measures to ensure your toilet remains free from future clogs. Say goodbye to plumbing emergencies and hello to a smoothly running-toilet.

My kitchen sink drain is clogged. This is in a mobile home with 1.5 inch pipes under the sink. Every other drain is in the house is working fine. Yesterday I tried Drano, a plunger, & a 50 ft snake - none worked.
Today I tried a medium drain bladder, which worked the last time this happened a few years ago. Last time, the bladder sealed the pipe & unblocked the clog. This time water rinsed back out (& made a big mess). I went in through a clean out that comes up above the p trap. After that, I opened the p trap & put a bucket under to catch the water - no more mess, but still didn't unclog the drain. I'm pretty sure the clog is about a foot below the p trap.
Any ideas of what else I can do?
Also, the bladder hasn't been used in almost 4 years. Could that be the reason it isn't expanding enough to seal the pipe? Maybe a new one will work?

Tiandis, Orochi too boring of a hero for you? All that dodge light spam do you even use the full character's moveset? Of course you dont, why would you? Tiandi's damage is about as bad as Peacekeeper's damage. Your feats are are extremely bullshit, being rewarded for sucking dick. Heal from damage when health is low and even get a shield? Wow! Wow! Wow! I at least know for a fact you "dodge specialists" have dialogue muted because if you dont if you actually play Tiandi with "MADNESS IS POWER!'" on full volume, you mignt be as psychopathic as Tiandi.
Zhanhus, must feel pretty good being an actual dodge sepcialist huh? Doing Tiandi's job better than him. Too bad you Firebrands got nothing to show for it. Just dodge light unblockable light on repeat. Or maybe you just tap zone every second of the fight. Or you backstep light softfeint the unblockable into gb. You have a deflect type attack and even a bash yet, you pyromaniacs only do one combo every fight no matter your rep. Why dont you dipshits go back to the rice farms where you belong.
Nuxias, we have it rough dont we? Our traps never really work, even the bots just change their guard when we try it on them. Our dodge light is even easier to parry than Orochi's dodge light. Our zone is slow as fuck and we have Centurion's tracking with our heavies. At least our lights cheap and bullshit, and our heavies hit like a 6'5 gym rat girl punching you in the arm. Our caltrops are the biggest "fuck you die" feat that people are honestly sleeping on. Our heavies have such a thick hitbox they hit everyone around us. And lets face it, we are the hottest heroes besides Peacekeepers and Nobushis.
Jiang Juns, how is it you hit everyone on the map and the one next door with your stupid Chinese Halberd? Like fucking wow. You really love externals THAT much?! Why is it too your lights never seem to have an animation just boom they hit me? Ah well, at least you're all dodge happy morons and have a pretty gb vulnerable attack. I'm surprised you assholes have that stamina regen considering Jiang Jun should be in a nursing home, and if you play him, you should be too.
Shaolins, must be fucking great. Playing a character who always has his turn to attack. You never run out of stamina, you deal 30 damage with any attack despite using a literal stick. You can teleport because of course you can. Gravity doesnt apply to you. Your dodge attack is jank giving you free damage. You and your hero have the same level of narcissism. Finger wag emote. Honestly thenmost satisfying feeling in this game is when I finally kill you monkey ass and hear your death noise in which you actually turn into a monkey. Literally makes me happier to hear that than seeing a woman's tits. Please, teleport down a well, so I can pour this bucket of snakes down it. Lets see if your monkey ass can teleport out quick enough.

Hi all, just want to start off to say I know nothing about plumbing but wanted to get some opinions about my situation. Apologies for the long post, the questions I have are at the end of the post.
After coming back from work this evening we noticed a puddle formed around the basement drain as well as backed up water in the basement toilet/bathtub (and a bad smell).
We called out a plumber to unblock the drain and as this was out of hours were told it would cost us a certain amount for the job (rather than an hourly rate).
I can't fault the guy for his effort, he was there for nearly 4 hours trying to unblock the drain with the snake machine and only on the last attempt did he make a little headway (the water level was up to the drain and went down by about 5 inches once he was done.
A couple of things that I was a little concerned with was that the guy didn't seem to be the most experienced as he had to call someone a couple of times (he was initially trying the snake in a different pipe/direction and then changed to a different one after speaking to a guy who was more experienced and had more knowledge of the drains in our neighbourhood.
Also, he was saying that on this occasion he didn't have a biggemore powerful machine in his van that some of his other colleagues usually have.
Once he made some headway at the end he was pulling out tampons and hair that was causing the clogging. We've only been in this house for 6 months so he said this could have been building up for years.
He suggested we get another company in that could suck out the contents of the drain.
What I'd like some input on is:

1. Would a larger machine/more experienced plumber likely have made quick work of a haitampon blockage? Or is this a stubborn job that would take hours regardless?
2. Is it unreasonable for them to expect the full amount they said it would cost even though they barely improved the situation? I appreciate that they came out after hours but I just feel it's a lot of money for an issue that's still unresolved

If there's anything I've missed out please let me know, thanks!

Hey Everybody! See my comment for more background/explanation of my methodology. Share in the comments your ideas for broken strategies with these upgraded relics!
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Relic Name	Relic Description	Relic+ Description	Relic++ Description
Akabeko	Your first attack each combat deals 8 additional damage	Your first attack each combat deals 10 additional damage	Your first attack each combat deals 12 additional damage
Anchor	Start each combat with 10 Block	Start each combat with 14 Block	Start each combat with 18 Block
Ancient Tea Set	Whenever you enter a Rest Site, start the next combat with 2 extra Energy	Whenever you enter a Rest Site, start the next combat with 3 extra Energy	Whenever you enter a Rest Site, start the next combat with 4 extra Energy
Astrolabe	Upon pickup, choose and Transform 3 cards, then Upgrade them	Upon pickup, choose and Transform 4 cards, then Upgrade them. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Astrolabe, choose and Transform 2 cards, then Upgrade them	Upon pickup, choose and Transform 5 cards, then Upgrade them. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Astrolabe+, choose and Transform 3 cards, then Upgrade them
Bag of Marbles	At the start of each combat, apply 1 Vulnerable to ALL enemies	At the start of each combat, apply 2 Vulnerable to ALL enemies	At the start of each combat, apply 3 Vulnerable to ALL enemies
Bag of Preparation	At the start of each combat, draw 2 additional cards	At the start of each combat, draw 3 additional cards	At the start of each combat, draw 4 additional cards
Bird-Faced Urn	Whenever you play a Power, heal 2 HP	Whenever you play a Power, heal 3 HP	Whenever you play a Power, heal 4 HP
Black Blood	Replaces Burning Blood. At the end of combat, heal 12 HP	Replaces Burning Blood. At the end of combat, heal 14 HP	Replaces Burning Blood. At the end of combat, heal 16 HP
Black Star	Elites drop an additional Relic when defeated	Elites drop an additional Relic when defeated. Dropped relics have a 25% chance of being + upgraded	Elites drop an additional Relic when defeated. Dropped relics have a 50% chance of being + upgraded
Blood Vial	At the start of each combat, heal 2 HP	At the start of each combat, heal 3 HP	At the start of each combat, heal 4 HP
Bloody Idol	Whenever you gain Gold, heal 5 HP	Whenever you gain Gold, heal 7 HP	Whenever you gain Gold, heal 9 HP
Blue Candle	Curse cards can now be played. Playing a Curse will make you lose 1 HP and Exhausts the card	Curse cards can now be played. Playing a Curse Exhausts the card	Curse cards can now be played. Playing a Curse Exhausts the card and heals 1 HP
The Boot	Whenever you would deal 4 or less unblocked Attack damage, increase it to 5	Whenever you would deal 4 or less unblocked Attack damage, increase it to 6	Whenever you would deal 4 or less unblocked Attack damage, increase it to 7
Bottled Flame	Upon pick up, choose an Attack card. Start each combat with this card in your hand	Upon pick up, choose 2 Attack cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Bottled Flame, choose 2 Attack cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand (resets previous choices)	Upon pick up, choose 3 Attack cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Bottled Flame+, choose 3 Attack cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand (resets previous choices)
Bottled Lightning	Upon pick up, choose a Skill. Start each combat with this card in your hand.	Upon pick up, choose 2 Skill cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Bottled Lightning, choose 2 Skill cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand (resets previous choices)	Upon pick up, choose 3 Skill cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Bottled Lightning+, choose 3 Skill cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand (resets previous choices)
Bottled Tornado	Upon pick up, choose a Power card. Start each combat with this card in your hand.	Upon pick up, choose 2 Power cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Bottled Tornado, choose 2 Power cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand (resets previous choices)	Upon pick up, choose 3 Power cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Bottled Tornado+, choose 3 Power cards. Start each combat with these cards in your hand (resets previous choices)
Brimstone	At the start of your turn, gain 2 Strength and ALL enemies gain 1 Strength	At the start of your turn, gain 3 Strength and ALL enemies gain 2 Strength	At the start of your turn, gain 4 Strength and ALL enemies gain 3 Strength
Bronze Scales	Start each combat with 3 Thorns	Start each combat with 4 Thorns	Start each combat with 5 Thorns
Burning Blood	At the end of combat, heal 6 HP	At the end of combat, heal 8 HP	At the end of combat, heal 10 HP
Busted Crown	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. On Card Reward screens, you have 2 fewer cards to choose from	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. On Card Reward screens, you have 1 fewer cards to choose from	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn.
Gold-Plated Cables	Your rightmost Orb triggers its passive an additional time	Your rightmost Orb triggers its passive 2 additional times	Your rightmost Orb triggers its passive 3 additional times
Calipers	At the start of your turn, lose 15 Block rather than all of your Block	At the start of your turn, lose 12 Block rather than all of your Block	At the start of your turn, lose 9 Block rather than all of your Block
Calling Bell	Upon pickup, obtain a unique Curse and 3 relics	Upon pickup, obtain 2 unique Curses and 4 relics. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Calling Bell, obtain 2 unique Curses and 2 relics	Upon pickup, obtain 3 unique Curses and 5 relics. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Calling Bell+, obtain 2 unique Curses and 2 relics
Captain's Wheel	At the start of your 3rd turn, gain 18 Block	At the start of your 3rd turn, gain 22 Block	At the start of your 3rd turn, gain 26 Block
Cauldron	Upon pickup, brews 5 random potions	Upon pickup, brews 6 random potions	Upon pickup, brews 7 random potions
Centennial Puzzle	The first time you lose HP each combat, draw 3 cards	The first time you lose HP each combat, draw 4 cards	The first time you lose HP each combat, draw 5 cards
Ceramic Fish	Whenever you add a card to your deck, gain 9 gold	Whenever you add a card to your deck, gain 12 gold	Whenever you add a card to your deck, gain 15 gold
Champion Belt	Whenever you apply Vulnerable, also apply 1 Weak	Whenever you apply Vulnerable, also apply 2 Weak	Whenever you apply Vulnerable, also apply 3 Weak
Charon's Ashes	Whenever you Exhaust a card, deal 3 damage to ALL enemies	Whenever you Exhaust a card, deal 4 damage to ALL enemies	Whenever you Exhaust a card, deal 5 damage to ALL enemies
Chemical X	Whenever you play a cost X card, its effects are increased by 2	Whenever you play a cost X card, its effects are increased by 3	Whenever you play a cost X card, its effects are increased by 4
Cloak Clapse	At the end of your turn, gain 1 block for each card in your hand	At the end of your turn, gain 2 block for each card in your hand	At the end of your turn, gain 3 block for each card in your hand
Clockwork Souvenir	At the start of each combat, gain 1 Artifact	At the start of each combat, gain 2 Artifact	At the start of each combat, gain 3 Artifact
Coffee Dripper	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You can no longer Rest at Rest Sites	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. Resting at Rest Sites is 25% effective	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. Resting at Rest Sites is 50% effective
Cracked Core	At the start of each combat, Channel 1 Lightning	At the start of each combat, Channel 2 Lightning	At the start of each combat, Channel 3 Lightning
Cursed Key	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. Whenever you open a non-boss Chest, obtain a Curse	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. Whenever you open a non-boss Chest, you have a 75% chance of obtaining a Curse	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. Whenever you open a non-boss Chest, you have a 50% chance of obtaining a Curse
Damaru	At the start of your turn, gain 1 Mantra	At the start of your turn, gain 2 Mantra	At the start of your turn, gain 3 Mantra
Darkstone Periapt	Whenever you obtain a Curse, increase your Max HP by 6	Whenever you obtain a Curse, increase your Max HP by 8	Whenever you obtain a Curse, increase your Max HP by 10
Data Disk	Start each combat with 1 Focus	Start each combat with 2 Focus	Start each combat with 3 Focus
Dead Branch	Whenever you Exhaust a card, add a random card to your hand.	Whenever you Exhaust a card, add a random card to your hand. The added card has a 25% chance of being upgraded	Whenever you Exhaust a card, add a random card to your hand. The added card has a 50% chance of being upgraded
Dolly's Mirror	Upon pickup, obtain an additional copy of a card in your deck	Upon pickup, obtain an additional copy of 2 cards in your deck. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Dolly's Mirror, obtain and add an additional copy of 1 card in your deck	Upon pickup, obtain an additional copy of 3 cards in your deck. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Dolly's Mirror, obtain and add an additional copy of 2 cards in your deck
Dream Catcher	Whenever you rest, you may add a card to your deck	Whenever you rest, you may add a card to your deck, choosing from 4 cards	Whenever you rest, you may add a card to your deck, choosing from 5 cards
Duality	Whenever you play an Attack, gain 1 temporary Dexterity	Whenever you play an Attack, gain 2 temporary Dexterity	Whenever you play an Attack, gain 3 temporary Dexterity
Du-Vu Doll	For each Curse in your deck, start each combat with 1 additional Strength.	For each Curse in your deck, start each combat with 2 additional Strength. Curses inflict double their effect.	For each Curse in your deck, start each combat with 3 additional Strength. Curses inflict triple their effect.
Ectoplasm	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You can no longer gain Gold	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. Gold rewards from combat are reduced by 75%	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. Gold rewards from combat are reduced by 50%
Emotion Chip	If you lost HP during the previous turn, trigger the passive ability of all Orbs at the start of your turn	If you lost HP during the previous turn, trigger the passive ability of all Orbs 2 times at the start of your turn	If you lost HP during the previous turn, trigger the passive ability of all Orbs 3 times at the start of your turn
Empty Cage	Upon pickup, remove 2 cards from your Deck	Upon pickup, remove 3 cards from your Deck. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Empty Cage, remove 1 card from your deck	Upon pickup, remove 4 cards from your Deck. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Empty Cage+, remove 2 cards from your deck
Enchiridion	At the start of each combat, add a random Power card to your hand. It costs 0 until the end of turn	At the start of each combat, add 2 random Power cards to your hand. They cost 0 until the end of turn	At the start of each combat, add 3 random Power cards to your hand. They cost 0 until the end of turn
Eternal Feather	For every 5 cards in your deck, heal 3 HP whenever you enter a Rest Site	For every 4 cards in your deck, heal 3 HP whenever you enter a Rest Site	For every 4 cards in your deck, heal 4 HP whenever you enter a Rest Site
Face of Cleric	Raise your Max HP by 1 after each combat	Raise your Max HP by 2 after each combat	Raise your Max HP by 3 after each combat
Fossilized Helix	Prevent the first time you would lose HP in combat.	Prevent the first 2 times you would lose HP in combat.	Prevent the first 3 times you would lose HP in combat.
Frozen Core	Replaces Cracked Core. If you end your turn with empty Orb slots, channel 1 Frost	Replaces Cracked Core. If you end your turn with empty Orb slots, channel 2 Frost	Replaces Cracked Core. If you end your turn with empty Orb slots, channel 3 Frost
Frozen Egg	Whenever you add a Power card to your deck, it is Upgraded.	Whenever you add a Power card to your deck, it is Upgraded and you gain 1 HP	Whenever you add a Power card to your deck, it is Upgraded and you gain 2 HP
Frozen Eye	When viewing your Draw Pile, the cards are now shown in order	When viewing your Draw Pile, the cards are now shown in order. Every 2 turns, you may choose to reorder 2 adjacent cards in your Draw Pile	When viewing your Draw Pile, the cards are now shown in order. Every 2 turns, you may choose to reorder 3 adjacent cards in your Draw Pile
Fusion Hammer	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You can no longer Smith at Rest Sites	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You can only Smith common cards at Rest Sites	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You can only Smith common and rare cards at Rest Sites
Gambling Chip	At the start of each combat, discard any number of cards then draw that many	At the start of each combat, discard any number of cards then draw that many, plus 1 additional card	At the start of each combat, discard any number of cards then draw that many, plus 2 additional cards
Ginger	You can no longer become Weakened.	You can no longer become Weakened. Enemy weakening effects grant you 1 Strength	You can no longer become Weakened. Enemy weakening effects grant you 2 Strength
Girya	You can now gain Icon Strength Strength at Rest Sites. (3 times max)	You can now gain Strength at Rest Sites. (4 times max)	You can now gain Strength at Rest Sites. (5 times max)
Golden Eye	Whenever you Scry, Scry 2 additional cards	Whenever you Scry, Scry 3 additional cards	Whenever you Scry, Scry 4 additional cards
Golden Idol	Enemies drop 25% more gold	Enemies drop 35% more gold	Enemies drop 45% more gold
Gremlin Horn	Whenever an enemy dies, gain 1 Energy and draw 1 card	Whenever an enemy dies, gain 1 Energy and draw 2 cards	Whenever an enemy dies, gain 1 Energy and draw 3 cards
Hand Drill	Whenever you break an enemy's Block, apply 2 Vulnerable	Whenever you break an enemy's Block, apply 3 Vulnerable	Whenever you break an enemy's Block, apply 4 Vulnerable
Happy Flower	Every 3 turns, gain 1 Energy	Every 3 turns, gain 2 Energy	Every 3 turns, gain 3 Energy
Holy Water	Replaces Pure Water. At the start of each combat, add 3 Miracles to your hand	Replaces Pure Water. At the start of each combat, add 2 Miracles and 1 Miracle+ to your hand	Replaces Pure Water. At the start of each combat, add 1 Miracle and 2 Miracle+ to your hand
Horn Cleat	At the start of your 2nd turn, gain 14 Block	At the start of your 2nd turn, gain 18 Block	At the start of your 2nd turn, gain 22 Block
Hovering Kite	The first time you discard a card each turn, gain 1 Energy	The first two times you discard a card each turn, gain 1 Energy	The first three times you discard a card each turn, gain 1 Energy
Ice Cream	Energy is now conserved between turns	Energy is now conserved between turns. If any energy is conserved, gain 1 Energy for your next turn	Energy is now conserved between turns. If any energy is conserved, gain 1 Energy and draw 1 additional card for your next turn
Incense Burner	Every 6 turns, gain 1 Intangible	Every 5 turns, gain 1 Intangible	Every 4 turns, gain 1 Intangible
Ink Bottle	Whenever you play 10 cards, draw 1 card	Whenever you play 9 cards, draw 1 card	Whenever you play 8 cards, draw 1 card
Inserter	Every 2 turns, gain 1 Orb slot	Every 2 turns, gain 2 Orb slots	Every 2 turns, gain 2 Orb slots and channel 1 random orb
Juzu Bracelet	Regular enemy combats are no longer encountered in ? rooms	Regular enemy combats are no longer encountered in ? rooms. ? rooms have a 12.5% increased chance of being a Relic room	Regular enemy combats are no longer encountered in ? rooms. ? rooms have a 25% increased chance of being a Relic room
Kunai	Every time you play 3 Attacks in a single turn, gain 1 Dexterity	Every time you play 3 Attacks in a single turn, gain 2 Dexterity	Every time you play 3 Attacks in a single turn, gain 3 Dexterity
Lantern	Gain 1 Energy on the first turn of each combat	Gain 2 Energy on the first turn of each combat	Gain 3 Energy on the first turn of each combat
Lee's Waffle	Raise your Max HP by 7 and heal all of your HP	Raise your Max HP by 10 and heal all of your HP	Raise your Max HP by 13 and heal all of your HP
Letter Opener	Every time you play 3 Skills in a single turn, deal 5 damage to ALL enemies.	Every time you play 3 Skills in a single turn, deal 7 damage to ALL enemies	Every time you play 3 Skills in a single turn, deal 9 damage to ALL enemies
Lizard Tail	When you would die, heal to 50% of your Max HP instead (works once)	When you would die, heal to 75% of your Max HP instead (works once)	When you would die, heal to 100% of your Max HP instead (works once)
Magic Flower	Healing is 50% more effective during combat	Healing is 75% more effective during combat	Healing is 100% more effective during combat
Mango	Upon pickup, raise your Max HP by 14	Upon pickup, raise your Max HP by 18. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Mango, raise your Max HP by 6	Upon pickup, raise your Max HP by 22. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Mango+, raise your Max HP by 6
Mark of Pain	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. Start combats with 2 Wounds in your draw pile	Gain 2 Energy at the start of each turn. Start combats with 4 Wounds in your draw pile	Gain 3 Energy at the start of each turn. Start combats with 6 Wounds in your draw pile
Matryoshka	The next 2 chests you open contain 2 Relics. (Excludes boss chests)	The next 3 chests you open contain 2 Relics. (Excludes boss chests)	The next 4 chests you open contain 2 Relics. (Excludes boss chests)
Maw Bank	Whenever you climb a floor, gain 12 Gold. No longer works when you spend any Gold at the shop	Whenever you climb a floor, gain 16 Gold. No longer works when you spend any Gold at the shop	Whenever you climb a floor, gain 20 Gold. No longer works when you spend any Gold at the shop
Meal Ticket	Whenever you enter a shop room, heal 15 HP	Whenever you enter a shop room, heal 20 HP	Whenever you enter a shop room, heal 25 HP
Medical Kit	Status cards can now be played. Playing a Status will Exhaust the card	Status cards can now be played. Playing a Status will Exhaust the card and Heal 1 HP	Status cards can now be played. Playing a Status will Exhaust the card and Heal 2 HP
Melange	Whenever you shuffle your draw pile, Scry 3	Whenever you shuffle your draw pile, Scry 4	Whenever you shuffle your draw pile, Scry 5
Membership Card	50% discount on all products!	60% discount on all products!	70% discount on all products!
Mercury Hourglass	At the start of your turn, deal 3 damage to ALL enemies	At the start of your turn, deal 4 damage to ALL enemies	At the start of your turn, deal 5 damage to ALL enemies
Molten Egg	Whenever you add an Attack card to your deck, it is Upgraded	Whenever you add an Attack card to your deck, it is Upgraded and you gain 1 HP	Whenever you add an Attack card to your deck, it is Upgraded and you gain 2 HP
Mummified Hand	Whenever you play a Power, a random card in your hand costs 0 for the turn	Whenever you play a Power, two random cards in your hand costs 0 for the turn	Whenever you play a Power, three random cards in your hand costs 0 for the turn
Mutagenic Strength	Start each combat with 3 Strength that is lost at the end of your turn	Start each combat with 4 Strength that is lost at the end of your turn	Start each combat with 5 Strength that is lost at the end of your turn
Necronomicon	The first Attack played each turn that costs 2 or more is played twice. When you take this relic, become Cursed	The first two Attacks played each turn that costs 2 or more are played twice. When you obtain this relic or upgrade Necronomicon, become Cursed twice and lose 20 Max HP	The first three Attacks played each turn that costs 2 or more are played twice. When you obtain this relic or upgrade Necronomicon+, become Cursed three times and lose 40 Max HP
Neow's Lament	Enemies in your first 3 combats will have 1 HP	Enemies in your first 3 combats will have 1 HP. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Neow's Lament, enemies in your next 3 combats will have 1 HP (excluding Bosses)	Enemies in your first 3 combats will have 1 HP. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Neow's Lament+, enemies in your next 3 combats will have 1 HP (excluding Bosses)
Nirly's Codex	At the end of each turn, you can choose 1 of 3 random cards to shuffle into your draw pile	At the end of each turn, you can choose 1 of 3 random cards to shuffle into your draw pile. Chosen cards have a 25% to be upgraded	At the end of each turn, you can choose 1 of 3 random cards to shuffle into your draw pile. Chosen cards have a 50% to be upgraded
Ninja Scroll	Start each combat with 3 Shivs in hand	Start each combat with 3 Shiv+'s in hand	Start each combat with 3 Shiv+2's in hand
N'loth's Gift	Triples the chance of receiving rare cards as monster rewards	Quadruples(4X) the chance of receiving rare cards as monster rewards	Quintuples(5X) the chance of receiving rare cards as monster rewards
Nuclear Battery	At the start of each combat, Channel 1 Plasma	At the start of each combat, Channel 2 Plasma	At the start of each combat, Channel 3 Plasma
Nunchaku	Every time you play 10 Attacks, gain 1 Energy	Every time you play 9 Attacks, gain 1 Energy	Every time you play 8 Attacks, gain 1 Energy
Oddly Smooth Stone	At the start of each combat, gain 1 Dexterity	At the start of each combat, gain 2 Dexterity	At the start of each combat, gain 3 Dexterity
Odd Mushroom	When Vulnerable, take 25% more damage rather than 50%	You can no longer become Vulnerable	You can no longer become Vulnerable. Enemy vulnerability effects are inflicted on enemies instead of you.
Old Coin	Gain 300 Gold	Gain 400 Gold. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Old Coin, gain 300 Gold	Gain 500 Gold. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Old Coin+, gain 300 Gold
Omamori	Negate the next 2 Curses you obtain	Negate the next 3 Curses you obtain. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Omamori, negate the next Curse you obtain	Negate the next 4 Curses you obtain. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Omamori+, negate the next Curse you obtain
Orange Pellets	Whenever you play a Power, Attack, and Skill in the same turn, remove all of your Debuffs	Whenever you play a Power, Attack, and Skill in the same turn, remove all of your Debuffs and inflict all removed Debuffs randomly on enemies	Whenever you play a Power, Attack, and Skill in the same turn, remove all of your Debuffs, and inflict 2x all removed Debuffs randomly on enemies
Orichalcum	If you end your turn without Block, gain 6 Block	If you end your turn without Block, gain 8 Block	If you end your turn without Block, gain 10 Block
Ornamental Fan	Every time you play 3 Attacks in a single turn, gain 4 Block	Every time you play 3 Attacks in a single turn, gain 6 Block	Every time you play 3 Attacks in a single turn, gain 8 Block
Orrery	Choose and add 5 cards to your deck	Choose and add 7 cards to your deck. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Orrery, choose and add 3 cards to your deck	Choose and add 9 cards to your deck. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Orrery+, choose and add 4 cards to your deck
Pandora's Box	Transform all Strikes and Defends	Transform all Strikes and Defends. Transformed cards have a 50% chance of being upgraded. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Pandora's Box, Transform up to 5 cards from your deck	Transform all Strikes and Defends. Transformed cards have a 100% chance of being upgraded. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Pandora's Box+, Transform up to 5 cards from your deck
Pantograph	At the start of boss combats, heal 25 HP	At the start of boss combats, heal 35 HP	At the start of boss combats, heal 45 HP
Paper Krane	Enemies with Weak deal 40% less damage rather than 25%	Enemies with Weak deal 50% less damage rather than 25%	Enemies with Weak deal 60% less damage rather than 25%
Paper Phrog	Enemies with Vulnerable take 75% more damage rather than 50%	Enemies with Vulnerable take 87.5% more damage rather than 50%	Enemies with Vulnerable take 100% more damage rather than 50%
Peace Pipe	You can now remove cards from your deck at Rest Sites	You can now remove up to 2 cards from your deck at Rest Sites	You can now remove up to 3 cards from your deck at Rest Sites
Pear	Upon pickup, raise your Max HP by 10	Upon pickup, raise your Max HP by 14. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Pear, raise your Max HP by 6	Upon pickup, raise your Max HP by 18. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Pear, raise your Max HP by 6
Pen Nib	Every 10th Attack you play deals double damage	Every 9th Attack you play deals double damage	Every 8th Attack you play deals double damage
Philosopher's Stone	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. ALL enemies start with 1 Strength.	Gain 2 Energy at the start of each turn. ALL enemies start with 2 Strength.	Gain 3 Energy at the start of each turn. ALL enemies start with 3 Strength.
Pocketwatch	Whenever you play 3 or less cards in a turn, draw 3 additional cards at the start of your next turn	Whenever you play 3 or less cards in a turn, draw 4 additional cards at the start of your next turn	Whenever you play 3 or less cards in a turn, draw 5 additional cards at the start of your next turn
Potion Belt	Upon pick up, gain 2 potion slots	Upon pick up, gain 3 potion slots. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Potion Belt, gain 1 potion slot	Upon pick up, gain 4 potion slots. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Potion Belt+, gain 1 potion slot
Prayer Wheel	Normal enemies drop an additional card reward	Normal and Elite enemies drop an additional card reward	ALL enemies drop an additional card reward
Preserved Insect	Enemies in Elite rooms have 25% less HP	Enemies in Elite rooms have 35% less HP	Enemies in Elite rooms have 45% less HP
Prismatic Shard	Combat reward screens now contain colorless cards and cards from other colors	Combat reward screens now contain colorless cards and cards from other colors. Cards from other colors are always upgraged	Combat reward screens now contain colorless cards and cards from other colors. Colorless cards and cards from other colors are always upgraded and uncommon or rare
Pure Water	At the start of each combat, add a Miracle to your hand	At the start of each combat, add 2 Miracles to your hand	At the start of each combat, add 3 Miracles to your hand
Question Card	Future card rewards have 1 additional card to choose from	Future card rewards have 2 additional cards to choose from	Future card rewards have 3 additional cards to choose from
Red Mask	At the start of each combat, apply 1 Weak to ALL enemies	At the start of each combat, apply 2 Weak to ALL enemies	At the start of each combat, apply 3 Weak to ALL enemies
Red Skull	While your HP is at or below 50%, you have 3 additional Strength	While your HP is at or below 50%, you have 4 additional Strength	While your HP is at or below 50%, you have 5 additional Strength
Regal Pillow	Heal an additional 15 HP when you Rest	Heal an additional 20 HP when you Rest	Heal an additional 25 HP when you Rest
Ring of the Serpent	Replaces Ring of the Snake. At the start of your turn, draw 1 additional card	Replaces Ring of the Snake. At the start of your turn, draw 2 additional cards	Replaces Ring of the Snake. At the start of your turn, draw 3 additional card
Ring of the Snake	At the start of each combat, draw 2 additional cards	At the start of each combat, draw 3 additional cards	At the start of each combat, draw 4 additional cards
Runic Capacitor	Start each combat with 3 additional Orb slots	Start each combat with 4 additional Orb slots	Start each combat with 5 additional Orb slots
Runic Cube	Whenever you lose HP, draw 1 card	Whenever you lose HP, draw 2 cards	Whenever you lose HP, draw 3 cards
Runic Dome	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You can no longer see enemy Intents	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You cannot see enemy Intents 75% of the time	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You cannot see enemy Intents 50% of the time
Runic Pyramid	At the end of your turn, you no longer discard your hand	At the end of your turn, you no longer discard your hand. At the start of your next turn, upgrade 1 random card in your hand for the rest of combat	At the end of your turn, you no longer discard your hand. At the start of your next turn, upgrade 2 random cards in your hand for the rest of combat
Sacred Bark	Double the effectiveness of potions	Triples the effectiveness of potions	Quadruples (4x) the effectiveness of potions
Self-Forming Clay	Whenever you lose HP in combat, gain 3 Block next turn	Whenever you lose HP in combat, gain 4 Block next turn	Whenever you lose HP in combat, gain 5 Block next turn
Shovel	You can now Dig for loot at Rest Sites	You can now Dig for relics at Rest Sites. Dug relics have a 25% to be upgraded	You can now Dig for relics at Rest Sites. Dug relics have a 50% to be upgraded
Shiruken	Every time you play 3 Attacks in a single turn, gain 1 Strength	Every time you play 3 Attacks in a single turn, gain 2 Strength	Every time you play 3 Attacks in a single turn, gain 3 Strength
Singing Bowl	When adding cards to your deck, you may gain +2 Max HP instead	When adding cards to your deck, you may gain +3 Max HP instead	When adding cards to your deck, you may gain +4 Max HP instead
Slaver's Collar	During Boss and Elite combats, gain 1 Energy at the start of your turn	During Boss and Elite combats, gain Energy at the start of your turn. You have a 25% to gain 2 Energy instead	During Boss and Elite combats, gain Energy at the start of your turn. You have a 50% to gain 2 Energy instead
Sling of Courage	Start each Elite combat with 2 Strength	Start each Elite combat with 3 Strength	Start each Elite combat with 4 Strength
Smiling Mask	The merchant's card removal service now always costs 50 Gold	The merchant's card removal service now always costs 25 Gold	The merchant's card removal service is now always free
Snecko Skull	Whenever you apply Poison, apply an additional 1 Poison	Whenever you apply Poison, apply an additional 2 Poison	Whenever you apply Poison, apply an additional 3 Poison
Snecko Eye	Draw 2 additional cards each turn. Start each combat Confused	Draw 3 additional cards each turn. Start each combat Confused	Draw 4 additional cards each turn. Start each combat Confused
Sozu	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You can no longer obtain potions	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. Potions drop 75% less often	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. Potions drop 50% less often
Ssserpent Head	Whenever you enter a ? room, gain 50 Gold	Whenever you enter a ? room, gain 75 Gold	Whenever you enter a ? room, gain 100 Gold
Strange Spoon	Cards which Exhaust when played will instead discard 50% of the time.	Cards which Exhaust when played will instead discard 25% of the time	Cards which Exhaust when played will instead always discard
Strawberry	Upon pickup, raise your Max HP by 7	Upon pickup, raise your Max HP by 10. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Strawberry, gain 3 HP	Upon pickup, raise your Max HP by 13. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Strawberry+, gain 4 HP
Strike Dummy	Cards containing "Strike" deal 3 additional damage	Cards containing "Strike" deal 4 additional damage	Cards containing "Strike" deal 5 additional damage
Sundial	Every 3 times you shuffle your draw pile, gain 2 Energy	Every 2 times you shuffle your draw pile, gain 2 Energy	Every 2 times you shuffle your draw pile, gain 3 Energy
Symbiotic Virus	At the start of each combat, Channel 1 Dark	At the start of each combat, Channel 2 Dark	At the start of each combat, Channel 3 Dark
Teardrop Locket	Start each combat in Calm	Start each combat in Calm and gain 1 Energy	Start each combat in Calm and gain 2 Energy
The Abacus	Gain 6 Block whenever you shuffle your draw pile.	Gain 9 Block whenever you shuffle your draw pile.	Gain 12 Block whenever you shuffle your draw pile.
The Courier	The merchant no longer runs out of cards, relics, or potions and his prices are reduced by 20%	The merchant no longer runs out of cards, relics, or potions and his prices are reduced by 30%	The merchant no longer runs out of cards, relics, or potions and his prices are reduced by 40%
The Specimen	Whenever an enemy dies, transfer any Poison it has to a random enemy	Whenever an enemy dies, transfer any Poison it has to ALL enemies	Whenever an enemy dies, transfer 2X Poison it has to ALL enemies
Threaded Needle	At the start of each combat, gain 4 Plated Armor	At the start of each combat, gain 6 Plated Armor	At the start of each combat, gain 8 Plated Armor
Tingsha	Whenever you discard a card during your turn, deal 3 damage to a random enemy for each card discarded	Whenever you discard a card during your turn, deal 4 damage to a random enemy for each card discarded	Whenever you discard a card during your turn, deal 5 damage to a random enemy for each card discarded
Tiny Chest	Every 4th ? room is a Treasure room	Every 3rd ? room is a Treasure room	Every 3rd ? room is a Treasure room. Treasue Room Relics have a 50% chance of being upgraded
Tiny House	Obtain 1 potion. Gain 50 Gold. Raise your Max HP by 5. Obtain 1 card. Upgrade 1 Random card	Obtain 2 potions. Gain 100 Gold. Raise your Max HP by 10. Obtain 2 cards. Upgrade 2 Random cards. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Tiny House: Obtain 1 potion. Gain 50 Gold. Raise your Max HP by 5. Obtain 1 card. Upgrade 1 Random card	Obtain 3 potions. Gain 150 Gold. Raise your Max HP by 15. Obtain 3 cards. Upgrade 3 Random cards. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Tiny House+: Obtain 1 potion. Gain 50 Gold. Raise your Max HP by 5. Obtain 1 card. Upgrade 1 Random card
Toolbox	At the start of each combat, choose 1 of 3 random Colorless cards and add the chosen card into your hand	At the start of each combat, choose 1 of 4 random Colorless cards and add the chosen card into your hand	At the start of each combat, choose 1 of 5 random Colorless cards and add the chosen card into your hand
Torii	Whenever you would receive 5 or less unblocked Attack damage, reduce it to 1	Whenever you would receive 6 or less unblocked Attack damage, reduce it to 1	Whenever you would receive 7 or less unblocked Attack damage, reduce it to 1
Tough Bandages	Whenever you discard a card during your turn, gain 3 Block	Whenever you discard a card during your turn, gain 4 Block	Whenever you discard a card during your turn, gain 5 Block
Toxic Egg	Whenever you add a Skill card to your deck, upgrade it	Whenever you add a Skill card to your deck, upgrade it and gain 1 HP	Whenever you add a Skill card to your deck, upgrade it and gain 2 HP
Toy Ornithopter	Whenever you use a potion, heal 5 HP	Whenever you use a potion, heal 7 HP	Whenever you use a potion, heal 9 HP
Tungsten Rod	Whenever you would lose HP, lose 1 less	Whenever you would lose HP, lose 2 less	Whenever you would lose HP, lose 3 less
Turnip	You can no longer become Frail	You can no longer become Frail. Enemy frailty effects grant you 1 Dexterity	You can no longer become Frail. Enemy frailty effects grant you 2 Dexterity
Twisted Funnel	At the start of each combat, apply 4 Poison to ALL enemies	At the start of each combat, apply 6 Poison to ALL enemies	At the start of each combat, apply 8 Poison to ALL enemies
Unceasing Top	Whenever you have no cards in hand during your turn, draw a card.	Whenever you have no cards in hand during your turn, Scry 2 and draw a card.	Whenever you have no cards in hand during your turn, Scry 3 and draw a card.
Vajra	At the start of each combat, gain 1 Strength	At the start of each combat, gain 2 Strength	At the start of each combat, gain 3 Strength
Velvet Choker	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You cannot play more than 6 cards per turn	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You cannot play more than 7 cards per turn	Gain 1 Energy at the start of each turn. You cannot play more than 8 cards per turn
Violet Lotus	Whenever you exit Calm, gain an additional Energy	Whenever you exit Calm, gain 2 additional Energy	Whenever you exit Calm, gain 3 additional Energy
War Paint	Upon pick up, Upgrade 2 random Skills.	Upon pick up, Upgrade 3 random Skills. If you obtain this relic by upgrading War Paint, Upgrade 3 random skills	Upon pick up, Upgrade 4 random Skills. If you obtain this relic by upgrading War Paint+, Upgrade 4 random skills
Warped Tongs	At the start of your turn, Upgrade a random card in your hand for the rest of combat	At the start of your turn, Upgrade 2 random cards in your hand for the rest of combat	At the start of your turn, Upgrade 3 random cards in your hand for the rest of combat
Whetstone	Upon pick up, Upgrade 2 random Attacks	Upon pick up, Upgrade 3 random Attacks. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Whetstone, Upgrade 3 random Attacks	Upon pick up, Upgrade 4 random Attacks. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Whetstone+, Upgrade 4 random Attacks
White Beast Statue	Potions always drop after combat	2 Potions always drop after combat	3 Potions always drop after combat
Winged Boots	You may ignore paths when choosing the next room to travel to 3 times	You may ignore paths when choosing the next room to travel to 4 times. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Winged Boots, You may ignore paths when choosing the next room to travel to 2 times	You may ignore paths when choosing the next room to travel to 5 times. If you obtain this relic by upgrading Winged Boots, You may ignore paths when choosing the next room to travel to 3 times
Wrist Blade	Attacks that cost 0 deal 4 additional damage	Attacks that cost 0 deal 5 additional damage	Attacks that cost 0 deal 6 additional damage

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I wish I had bothered to take pictures of this one. I'm sure I'll get some feedback on Monday, but I've learned to seek second opinions as I'm learning this trade because people will tell you all kinds of things.
On Thursday, we had to clean a sewer that was installed on a very steep grade. From the cleanout to the manhole at the bottom of the hill was maybe 70'. The pipe material at the cleanout looked like schedule 80 even though nobody in their right mind would do that. It was too forgiving to be ABS, but the cleanout cap was PVC.
I'm a helper for someone with half my experience (long story, haven't done much drain cleaning though). We use a Ridgid sectional machine with 7/8" cables that are 15' each. I don't know all the technical names, but we started with a small, single, curved cutter head. Pulled back a few feminine hygiene products, but nothing to write home about. Our boss drove over at one point (after hours at this point) and suggested we use the small head that looks like a corkscrew. Moments after him leaving and running the machine with the new head, it became entirely stuck. We ran the machine foreword and reverse & even took it out of the machine so we could both haul on it. No dice.
The technician had the idea to run the end of the cable to his trailer hitch and pull it with the van. At this point, neither of knew what to do. The tech called one of our senior guys, who advised to put a pipe wrench on the cable to get it to turn, which didn't end up working. He then called the same guy and told him we were going to pull it with the van. I figured there would be the risk of damaging the cable, but it had to come out somehow. We stacked tires next to the cleanout so as to direct the pulling force as vertical as possible. Very slowly, we started pulling the cable and it gives a little. In slow nudges, it seems like we're making progress. The visible cables start to stretch (I'm standing far away) and eventually we stop when it doesn't seem to be working anymore. Tech calls boss & gets yelled at. We went down to the manhole and see a 6" clay pipe that has been broken from the top. It looks like somebody broke it intentionally in order to unblock it. So, we just left to have the tech & our on-call senior guy deal with it during normal business hours.
Today, they had to call the municipality to jet the line from the bottom. They got the line cleared & we only lost one of our 4 cables that were inside.
I'd love to know what we could have done differently. I'm really surprised it didn't come out with the van.
The cool thing about drain cleaning is that it's accessible to pretty much anyone who wants to do it. Folks always talk about it as a super easy way to make money. However, as with all the other aspects of plumbing, you can mess something up pretty easily that can cost thousands of dollars.
The last thing I'll say is that our company has cleaned this sewer MANY times in a brief period. Due to the grade of the slope, the business would rather pay somebody to keep cleaning the line than to replace it (if it needed it). My idea is to perhaps establish a company policy, where if we cable the same drain more than say, twice in a short period of time, that we perform a non-negotiable video with the see snake. If there are break downs, focus more on repairs than repeat cleaning & turn down the customers that don't want to make repairs. Am I off base here or is there something to improperly maintained sewers that make them harder to service.
Any advice is appreciated. Thanks!

It’s time for part 7 of the series where I rank every modal card with EDHREC! And oh boy have we broken into the realm of really strong cards. But before I get into those, there’s a bit of housekeeping I have to do. Because, well, I kinda screwed up. In compiling the list of modal cards, I apparently missed 5 cards. Two of those cards we wouldn’t have gotten to yet, so it’s no huge problem there, but as for the other 3… well, those are the problems. They should’ve been covered a while ago by now. So I’m going to go over them here real quick with where they should have actually placed in the overall rankings.
410 - Orzhov Pontiff (611 Decks)
Haunt is such a disappointing ability. If it didn’t exile the creature, I think that it could have some value in reanimation decks as recurrable value. This card, in particular, could work well as a pseudo board-wipe effect in that regard. Unfortunately, that’s purely hypothetical as it exiles itself immediately upon death. So you get a max of two triggers from this card over the course of the entire game, and the effect just isn’t strong enough to warrant a deck slot for so little value.
332 - Wail of the Forgotten (2037 Decks)
If you can reliably fill your graveyard, this is a solid card. You get to bounce a card, draw a card, mill two, and make an opponent discard all for two mana. This has so much utility in the right deck that I’m honestly astounded that it doesn’t see more play than it does. I know it’s from a recent set, but still. This is good in any graveyard-based strategy.
266 - Riveteers Confluence (4100 Decks)
I like all of what this card is doing. I just don’t know if I like it for five mana at sorcery speed. You can get the card draw with Ambition’s Cost. You can get the damage-based removal with Rolling Earthquake or similar cards. And you can get the ramp with Splendid Reclamation. The appeal of a card like this is that you’re paying an additional mana for the versatility of having a card that can fill any of those three purposes, or even a little of each if needed. I think this is an interested card to evaluate if nothing else, because it really will depend on how fast your meta typically is. If you can afford to wait an additional turn to fire off one of these effects, then this is definitely worth considering over any of the other options.
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And those are the cards that I missed out on from before. And now, time for the actual part 7!
241 - Teachings of the Kirin (5067 Decks)
This is an interesting card. In theory, it could fit into a self-mill, +1/+1 counters, or even Snake tribal shell. In practice though, I don’t think it actually adds enough to any of those strategies to make it really worth the deck slot. Obviously, this is a slam dunk in any saga deck, but aside from that, I find this card to be a bit overrated.
240 - Celebr-8000 (5076 Decks)
This is such a fun card for any dice-rolling deck. It’s also a hilarious chaotic pick for an Odric deck. Either the Shadows over Innistrad or Midnight Vow one. Five mana is a bit much for a 3/3, but at least it can start rolling dice on the same turn you play it. All things considered, I approve of this card, and I love its design.
239 - Light the Way (5169 Decks)
This is a surprisingly strong card that I personally have overlooked. Cards that can untap your creatures are very powerful in EDH. Getting a permanent small boost to that creature’s stats doesn’t hurt either. And the ability to save one of your key pieces from a board wipe or targeted removal is also nice insurance in a pinch. I’m very impressed by how powerful this card can potentially be, especially for only a single mana. It should absolutely be seeing more play than it is. I’m honestly stunned.
238 - Lord Skitter’s Butcher (5177 Decks)
This is one of the best toolbox cards in a Rat tribal deck. You can make an on-tribe token, sacrifice an extra creature for some card advantage, or give your board evasion in preparation for an alpha strike. And even if that first mode really only is worth choosing in the relevant tribal deck, those last two modes are just generically good. Enough so that I would consider playing this in any go-wide deck, and especially if you’re building on a budget.
237 - Reap and Sow (5206 Decks)
Tutoring any land into play for only four mana is actually kinda insane. Being able to grab The World Tree to fix your mana, or Field of the Dead to start amassing a hoard of Zombies, or a bounce land to combo off in a Toggo and Kodama deck. This card slots so well into nearly any deck that has at least one non-basic land that it wants to see every game. And for two extra mana, you can destroy one of your opponent’s power lands as well. Having played with this card before, I really can’t overstate how powerful this effect is. I really suggest you try it yourself if you never have. You might find one of your new favorite ramp spells like I have.
236 - Demonic Pact (5341 Decks)
I played Standard during this era of the game, and I will never forget the fun I had playing the Harmless Pact deck where you play this card, get all the benefits from it, then gift it to your opponent with Harmless Offering to cause them to lose the game. It wasn’t a particularly consistent strategy, but oh man was it fun. And that’s how I would describe this card in general. It’s just fun. Even if you do end up losing the game because of it, it’s usually going to be in a spectacular way, having died to your own hubris. There’s also the option of looping this card with Boomerang-like effects if you don’t want to go for the combo kill I suppose.
235 - Kitsune Ace (5377 Decks)
I don’t think this is even particularly good in vehicle decks if I’m being honest. First strike isn’t a very impactful keyword to give a creature in most cases. The only deck I think it actually fits well into is Kotori, as it can actually crew all the vehicles in that deck on its own as long as the commander is also on the battlefield. But other than that, I’m just left underwhelmed by this card.
234 - Charming Scoundrel (5455 Decks)
This is trying to harken back to Charming Prince, but I’m not particularly impressed by any of these effects if I’m being honest. If you can blink or copy this card a whole bunch like in a Rionya deck, then it starts to look a lot better. But if you’re just planning to play this for a single trigger’s worth of value, then there’s other cards that do what this card does but so much better.
233 - Reverse the Polarity (5522 Decks)
First off, let me just say that I hate this card’s art. That’s usually not a sticking point to me when it comes to evaluating a card, but oh my god it’s the first thing that sticks out to me. Aside from that though, this is a really good card. You’re not going to be put in too many situations where you’ll be able to counter more than one spell, so it’ll end up feeling like you’re playing Cancel some of the time, but those narrow situations where it does come up will make you happy that you’re packing this card. Also, both of the other modes are powerful in their own right. Switching power and toughness isn’t going to be something that’ll always be something you want to do, but when its one mode out of three options, it’s a nice option to have if the occasion arises. And that last mode is a win con all on its own. Being able to make your board unblockable, or allying with another player to make all of their creatures unblockable to take out a common threat, is such a strong ability that it’s really worth playing just for that mode alone.
232 - Farid, Enterprising Salvager (5013 Decks + 532 Decks as Commander = 5545 Total Decks)
I’m really not sure what to think of this card, either as a commander or as part of the 99. On one hand, each of these modes is fine for two mana, and I do like that it does give you fuel for the cost of the ability whenever you sacrifice a non-token artifact. On the other hand, this just feels so underwhelming in the grand scheme of things. Overall, I’m just left perplexed.
231 - Clan Defiance (5594 Decks)
I love this card. This is one of my favorite iterations of the Fireball type of card. Sure, you only get three targets, but the damage doesn’t get split between those targets. Also, you avoid the issue of wiping out your own creatures that makes cards like Earthquake difficult to run in certain decks. Not every deck is going to want this card, but it’s an all star in the decks that do want it.
230 - Against All Odds (5766 Decks)
Simultaneously blinking and reanimating something for only four mana is actually ridiculous value. Even with there being a restriction on what you can reanimate, that’s still such a powerful effect that I’d play this in any deck that can fill the graveyard even semi-reliably. Since you can reanimate not just creatures, but also artifacts, that means this can also act as an odd form of ramp if you can get a mana rock onto the battlefield. Definitely a staple in mono-white reanimator if nothing else. Reya Dawnbringer is eating good.
229 - Blue Elemental Blast (5813 Decks)
It has the same positives and negatives as Hydroblast from last part. I don’t recommend running it, just like with that card.
228 - Plunge into Darkness (5852 Decks)
This card fascinates me. I can imagine a number of decks that would love this. Whether that’s Vilis, Tivash, or any deck wanting to combo off with Food Chain. But as a generic value card? This doesn’t seem too good when compared to other options. But those specific decks will thrive with this card, that’s for sure.
227 - Fury Charm (5862 Decks)
Eh, this is fine. If you’ve got a commander you want to be able to give trample to and want the upside of being able to destroy an artifact if necessary, then this is fine. Even better if you’re in a suspend deck and can use that last mode. Overall though, this is just kinda boring. Not bad, just unremarkable.
226 - Return from the Wilds (5867 Decks)
Ramp that can also either give you a creature or food token for various synergies is a really good card in the right decks. Like, yeah, you play this in any Human tribal or Food decks. I don’t feel like I’m breaking new ground with that opinion though. This is one of those cards where its value is really obvious to see. You’ll know if your decks wants it.
225 - Gruul Charm (5875 Decks)
This is an undoubtedly strong card. Being able to essentially make you board unblockable to opponents without fliers can just end games. Or, if your opponents’ boards are loaded up with fliers, you can wipe them out with the damage mode. You also get the niche upside of taking back stolen permanents if the need arises. I’m surprised that this card doesn’t see more play. It seems like a staple for any aggressive deck.
224 - Wretched Confluence (5928 Decks)
This card being instant speed certainly helps its playablity, as if it was a sorcery, I don’t think I could recommend playing it. But as it is, you have a decent removal, decent card draw, and decent recursion. I’m not blown away by any of these modes, but for five mana, getting three of these effects in some combination does feel worth it in the end.
223 - Rankle’s Prank (5956 Decks)
I’m not all that fond of this being a symmetrical effect, especially for four mana at sorcery speed. This seems crazy strong in Tergrid, decent in Mazirek, and not all that good pretty much anywhere else if I’m being completely honest. I’m not sure how it’s seeing as much play as it is.
222 - Trickery Charm (6038 Decks)
I’m not all that impressed by this card either. That last mode seems good in any deck that wants to manipulate the top of its deck I suppose, but other than that you can do some fun shenanigans with changing creature types, but that’s more of a novelty option than actually powerful ability.
221 - Gandalf the Grey (4778 Decks + 1267 Decks as Commander = 6045 Total Decks)
You really need to be playing Gandalf with blink and flicker effects. You don’t want to be recasting this guy every other turn. Specifically, this combos really well with Displacer Kitten. But if you can get that engine online, this becomes one of the strongest spellslinger commanders you can build. Being able to facilitate tap and untap shenanigans, burning your opponents out of the game, or copying your big spells. This guy can do it all. Aside from that one hurdle in deck building, this is a crazy good card.
220 - Return from Extinction (6092 Decks)
You know me. I love my Regrowth effects, especially when they’re two for one. I jam this in any tribal deck that has black in it and I never regret it.
219 - Emerald Charm (6123 Decks)
All these modes are very solid. I’ve sung the praises of untapping cards plenty to this point, but enchantment removal is always going to be good as well, even if it can’t hit auras. That last mode is just an added bonus in case you really need to ground a flying creature. I’m impressed by this card through and through.
218 - Slagstorm (6149 Decks)
I like that you have the option to use this as a board wipe or as a burn spell to facilitate various strategies. As a result, you can fit this into a lot more decks than something like Anger of the Gods and have it be just as impactful, if not moreso, even if it doesn’t exile the creatures it kills.
217 - Silumgar’s Command (6178 Decks)
Five mana for any two of these options is quite a bit to ask, even at instant speed. It’s versatile for sure, but you’re definitely paying for that versatility, as opposed to some of these other modal cards that feel fairly priced for the effects they’re giving you. This is a fine budget option, but it’s one of the first cards I’d cut once I start trying to upgrade the deck.
216 - Season of Renewal (6232 Decks)
Another card that that’s a two for one regrowth, another endorsement from me. Seriously, I love all these effects for the decks that they synergize with. I’m sorry for being a broken record, but my opinion isn’t going to suddenly change on this matter.
215 - Journey of Discovery (6339 Decks)
This is probably going to sound like an odd take, but hear me out. I’m not too fond of this card as a six mana Explosive Vegetation, but if you’re paying three mana for either of the modes individually, then I think it’s actually decent. I say that because turn three is a vital turn in most games. You really want to be either finishing up with your early-game ramp or beginning to add to the board in a meaningful way. And this card can definitely help you ramp in the right situations. Either you can dump an additional two lands from your hand onto the field, or you can grab two lands from your deck to your hand so that you don’t miss land drops on your subsequent turns. It’s a versatile card in that way. But by the time you’re at six mana, you don’t want to be spending it to get two basic lands from the deck to the battlefield. Even still though, I definitely recommend this card in any deck that plays the basic lands to support it.
214 - You Find a Cursed Idol (6402 Decks)
This is one of the best utility cards you can play in a deck that cares about dungeons. Unfortunately, if you’re in green then the only option you really have for that is Varis, which is a fine commander, but not all that exciting. And I especially don’t recommend playing this unless you care about venturing into the dungeon.
213 - Ulasht, the Hate Seed (5990 Decks + 416 Decks as Commander = 6406 Total Decks)
The fact that this card can create a bunch of green saprolings that then allow it to come into play with even more counters next time around is actually kinda insane. If you pair this with cards like Ashnod’s Altar, Phyrexian Altar, and Ivy Lane Denizen, you go infinite and can just explosively win out of nowhere by building up a bunch of mana and eventually burning out the table. Even if you want to build it in a more fair way, you can go wide with tokens and still make a giant creature that can threaten lethal an attack or two. This is a deceptively strong commander that doesn’t get nearly enough recognition in my opinion. And as part of the 99, this is a solid piece in any Hydra or Saproling tribal deck. It’s not crazy in either of those strategies, but its still good, and if that’s the floor, then you know that it’s gotta be a solid card.
212 - Destroy Evil (6408 Decks)
Meh. That’s the only reaction I have to this card. Sure, it can be either enchantment or creature removal, but I’d rather just play unconditional creature removal and enchantment removal that can also hit artifacts. This just feels like you’re settling on both fronts and I’m not impressed.
211 - Mishra’s Command (6443 Decks)
I really wish that first mode wasn’t an optional effect. I wish you could forcefully wheel an opponent’s hand in order to facilitate certain strategies like Nekusar and Xyris. Alas, it wasn’t meant to be. But even so, this is a solid toolbox card. Being able to wheel yourself is still good, and adding on some options for removal and a pump spell doesn’t hurt. This card isn’t particularly exciting or anything, but it does a decent job at what it’s trying to do, and that’s all you can really ask.
210 - Rankle and Torbran (6070 Decks + 496 Decks as Commander = 6566 Total Decks)
This is one of the scariest extra combat commanders you can play at a casual level. Sure, you could go infinite with Najeela or Godo, but slowly snowballing your evasive commander into doing two extra damage per attack, especially if you can give this thing double strike, makes for an incredibly quick clock that needs to be respected or else you can just eliminate one person out of nowhere. Outside of that though, this also makes for a fun aristocrats card, either as the commander or as part of the 99.
209 - Mirage Mockery (6580 Decks)
Clone effects are always welcome in commander. Especially at three mana, they’re very valuable. And being able to spend six mana to get two clones assuming you can meet the type requirements is extra powerful. It’s not a groundbreaking opinion, I’m aware. But I’m not able to disagree with the common consensus on this one.
208 - Promise of Power (6608 Decks)
Drawing five cards for five mana is actually insane. The loss of life only serves to make the card better if anything, as it helps to facilitate certain strategies like Vilis or the new Rowan. And that second mode is nothing to scoff at either. In the aforementioned Vilis deck, where you can easily end up with 20+ cards in hand, making a giant flying creature as a way to close out the game is a legitimate win condition. Triple black mana makes this difficult to recommend for anything other than mono-black decks, but if you can support that mana cost, then absolutely play this haymaker of a card.
207 - Concord with the Kami (6633 Decks)
I’m of two minds with this card. On one hand, I love the fact that this triggers every turn at your end step, so you can get value from it the turn you play it. On the other hand, I don’t like that it doesn’t do anything if you don’t already have a board state. Especially for four mana, playing something that’s not going to help advance your game unless you’re already established on the battlefield just creates situations where drawing this will feel bad.
206 - Kill! Maim! Burn! (6644 Decks)
I’m not sure what to think about this card if I’m being honest. Even at instant speed, for five mana, this feels not quite as impactful as I would like it to be. I’d honestly rather just play a Vandalblast or Damnation rather than this card if I’m being honest. Awesome card name though.
205 - Choose Your Weapon (6673 Decks)
Being able to double a creature’s stats opens a lot of possibilities for funny shenanigans and kills out of nowhere, especially since this is an instant. You can pretty much ignore that second mode 99% of the time. You’re playing this card for that first option, and this card will win you games because of it.
204 - Witherbloom Command (6717 Decks)
For two mana, just that first mode is worth the cost in just about any graveyard deck. Being able to use another mode on removal or a bit of life drain is just icing on the cake. I know there was a bit of disappointment surrounding this card at release, but I loved it then and I love it now. Seriously, if you’ve never tried playing with it, I suggest you give it a chance. I think you’ll come around on it.
203 - Invigorated Rampage (6718 Decks)
Well, it’s been a while since we’ve seen a card that’s good in Zada and not many other places, but here we are. I know that this does see play in other decks, but if I’m being honest, I don’t think it belongs anywhere else.
202 - Soul Transfer (6732 Decks)
Needing to control both an artifact and enchantment to get both modes is not exactly ideal. Especially considering that I’m not too excited about only being able to choose one of these modes. Sure, both of them are fine for three mana, but just aren’t all that exciting. You really want to be able to get both parts of the card off for the three mana to really feel good about playing it. And unless you can reliably get that to happen, I just can’t recommend this over other, better options.
201 - Urza’s Rebuff (6764 Decks)
Am I missing something? This is just a Cancel that can tap two creatures in a pinch. This shouldn’t be seeing anywhere near the amount of play that it is. I’m just dumbfounded as to how this nearly managed to get into the top 200.
​
And on that… rather disappointing note, that’s all for this time around. A bit longer due to needing to take care of those extra cards I forgot about, but I did make sure to double check the list with Srcyfall’s database and everything seems to be in order from here forward! So look forward to the next part where we venture into the top 200 and see what kind of powerful modal spells await us there!

i'll first give you some background info. the two girls, let's call them z and f, are 'best friends' which i don't mean to belittle but the way they behave is slightly immature and i'm actually concerned for both of their mental healths. z is a compulsive liar: she has even faked her own death and one of my friends actually believed her and began to get seriously concerned (the way this happened was that z messaged my friend pretending to be z's brother who was freaking out about his sister's death, yeah, it wasn't very convincing but z was genuinely trying to lie about that) . she lied for a whole year about having a phone and when she actually got one, she had to bring it in and show everyone to make us believe her. she has lied many other times and does it on a regular basis. i don't exactly blame her: i always thought that she was doing it to seem 'interesting' or to get people to care. we even used to be friends, we were friends since the start of high school, so i think i know her pretty well. i even tried extremely hard to sympathize with her and try to convince her that she didn't need to lie to get people to like her, but it didn't work. i believe it's extremely sad that felt like she had to pretend she was dead or that she had louis vuitton bags (she did that too) in order to seem interesting. i guess everyone wants to have something that sets them apart from everyone else, and she felt like she had nothing, so had to make things up instead. she often acts crazily in a way that makes me think that she isn't entirely there. for example, she held a funeral for a chair once it fell over last week, and then screamed at someone when they picked the chair back up. she then threw the chair back on the floor and continued rambling loudly. i smiled because of what she was doing and she yelled at me 'what's so funny' and i just shook my head and ignored her. a teacher came and asked her to pick up the chair, which she agreed to do, and then once the teacher left, z walked off, leaving the chair on the floor despite telling the teacher she would pick it up. she has a habit of laughing loudly, in a way that you can clearly tell is fake. when you talk to her, it sounds as if she isn't even listening, and she often starts looking away and turning her head while you talk, and often interrupts you whilst you're speaking to talk about herself. but she has this habit of always playing the victim, of always appearing to be the one suffering. she used to constantly, i guess, threaten us in the sense that she would say she was going to commit su*cide or sh, sometimes even stabbing herself with a pen/pencil in front of us, and of course this garnered our sympathy and we tried to help her out. it felt like she was emotionally manipulating us. i think even though we knew she was doing a lot of things just to get attention, she made us feel good, in the sense that when you can help someone who seems child-like and naive, it makes you feel like the protector, like you are a good person for helping them out. sometimes it feels like one set of rules applies to her, and another for everyone else. for example, z once took off my friend's shoe as a joke and kicked it slightly away from her, but when my friend tried to do the same to z, she told the deputy head teacher that we were bullying her. she claimed that multiple times, even once when i had temporarily moved schools. randomly, she would become aggressive and ignore me, saying that 'we're not even friends' even though previously that same day she claimed we were best friends. i found it stupid, and eventually i learnt to ignore it because i knew she'd be back to normal in a couple of hours. maybe she has some kind of personality disorder, but im only 14 and i am not a psychiatrist, so i can't diagnose her.
ill move on to f, who i don't know particularly well as we were only friends for a short number of months, but she is know that she is jealous and insecure about herself, which i also find sad. i became friends with her during october of 2022, and i was surprised, to say the least, when i realised how attached she was becoming to me at such a quick speed. i was in a poor mental state and the responsibility of another friendship wasn't helping me feel better, especially as i realised how much my mood and attitude towards her was affecting her. i knew it was likely because she didn't really have any friends, and was neglected by her parents and her siblings bothered her a lot, so when she became friends with me, she clung to me with a sort of desperation that i didn't exactly like or enjoy. i already had preconceptions about her because she was awkward and quiet and insecure, which made me feel bad for her and it was difficult to be around someone i constantly felt bad for, especially due to my already poor mental state. i can provide you with some examples of things she did: 1. within a few days or weeks of our friendship, she lied to me and said that she had gone outside, alone, at night, and was wandering around. obviously, as she was 15 years old and a girl and out at night i freaked out completely. she then told me that a man was following her about. and i gave her advice and told her to pretend to be on call with her parents, or to actually phone them. and then she sent one last message about the creepy man following her before stopping messaging. i was horrified and genuinely was about to phone the police when she messaged again after maybe 30 minutes telling me it was a prank. i was slightly annoyed but i forgave her, but she made me feel guilty by saying things like i didn't really forgive her and that she was so angry at herself, that she was stupid and always messed things up: she always did things like that, making me feel bad by insulting and putting herself down. i fervently tried to convince her that i did really forgive her, which i did, but by being so dramatic she blew everything out of proportion and that event is a lasting memory in my mind. i knew that everything bad she said about herself were things she believed to be true, which made it worse, because although she shouldn't have said those things it didn't change the fact that she was struggling, and i felt responsible to help her feel better.

1. she used to ask me to call with her every single day. we used to see each other every day at school, and as my sense of overwhelming responsibility increased, i felt i had no choice but to agree even when i didn't feel like it. of course, there were times where i did feel like it: i didn't hate her, i enjoyed her company and liked being her friend, i just felt too drained to constantly be on call with her as she wanted. there were a few times where i refused to call, either because i didn't feel like it or because i wasn't able to, and she made it seem like it wasn't a good enough reason, like my anxiety at having to call wasn't a good enough reason to not call. or that when i told her i had to clean my room or that my screen time was running out, she would reply as though i was making it up to get her off my case. that wasn't true at the time, but it got to the point where i did end up lying to her because me not feeling like calling wasn't a good enough excuse in her book, so the only way i wouldn't have to call would be if i was actually unable to. i just used to feel so guilty, all the time, whenever she was around. of course, when you constantly feel negative emotions around someone, you begin to attach those feelings to them, and begin to see them as a bad person. i knew she was going through things and often excused her behaviour because of that. but she was coming to me every day venting about her problems and i had to comfort her, which was difficult as i was also struggling silently.
   
2. her insecurities were probably the main reason why everything went so horribly wrong. her jealousy came especially into play regarding me, when i was talking to someone else or reading or doing anything other than talking to her, she would often get physical, slapping my head or my back to get my attention. one time z and i were walking and talking, side by side, and she tried to forcefully separate us, saying we were 'too close' and she often told z that she was bothered by the fact that z and i spoke to each other so much. i suppose she felt left out, but i think i was also confused as to why she had suddenly inserted herself into our friend group and was expecting so much from us without even trying in return. she would never try and talk to us, and we would try to include her, but it is difficult to do so when someone isolates themselves constantly as she did. when the spotlight was away from her for even a moment, she would recede into the shadows and remove herself from us. and then she thought we were the ones leaving her out. another time, z and i were sat together in class, and we hadn't chosen to sit next to each other, the teacher had put us there, and of course z and i were talking. f was at the other end of the classroom, yet she still complained to z that z and i were 'leaving her out' which didn't make much sense, as how were we supposed to include her in our conversation when she was at the other end of the classroom? another thing was the fact that she DID have a couple of friends, especially one of them who i'll call k, she is extremely nice. i felt bad for k, too, as since f was becoming close to my friends and i, k was often left alone at lunch and break. i made multiple hints, both explicit and implicit, that f should try and talk to k more, both because f really wanted a good friend, and i knew that k was a brilliant friend, but also because i felt tired of the responsibility and i guess, selfishly, i wanted to get rid of f by loading her off onto somebody else. well, saying that i wanted to get rid of her makes me sound evil, i just thought that maybe then both of us could be happy, as well as k.
   

the two often banded together and i felt like they both brought out the crazy in one another, and not in a good way. they motivated each other, which was nice and all, but something felt off, like how you feel when you see a post of someone saying they cut everyone off and are now only looking out for themselves and someone comments 'slay girl' or something. it felt shallow, i suppose, that's what you could call it. even though they seemed to be quite the pair, 'double trouble', z would often backbite about f to me, and i would do the same. i'm not proud of it, and i regret a lot of the things i said. i mean, i never insulted her or said anything untrue, but if i had said those things to her face, she would have been upset. that counts as backbiting in my book. i guess i complained about her more than anything, because z had started to also do so, and there's something odd about z, that makes you crave her approval or affection, i guess that'd got something to do with 'love bombing', sometimes she would act so nice, complimenting you like you're the best thing in the world, and at other times it'd be like you don't even exist to her. that's manipulative, and i knew that even at the time that how i was feeling was irrational, but it didn't stop me or any of my friends, including f, from feeling that way. anyway, back to my point, i think one of the biggest reasons why we talked so much about f behind her back was because it was, in some twisted way, a way we could bond: i could complain about how uncomfortable f's actions made me feel, and z could talk about how much f's actions affected her, how it made her upset, how it was so unfair that it was always her who these bad things happened to. whilst i stayed just talking about f's actions and how i wanted them to stop, z made everything about her. at the time, i didn't say anything because z was the only one i could rant to. the fact that she didn't really care about how i felt or what i was saying didn't really occur to me at the time. and when z complained about f, i suggested that we confront f, tell her whatever she was doing was bothering us so that maybe we could fix things, but z didn't even want to do that. i basically had to force z to confront f because i felt it was useless complaining about f all the time and that it was unfair on both us and f. even then, things didn't really change.
so then i tried confronting f by myself, something i had done multiple times but to no avail. z insulted me multiple times leading up to my confrontation, saying i had a mustache - which isn't exactly a thing a self conscious teen wants to hear- and that i looked like an old lady. she used to hit me and once slapped my hand multiple times to the point of it getting extremely red and looking inflamed. she used to vent to me every day without end. she used to ask me to do things with her without considering how i felt. she used to make me feel guilty for everything. i told her all of those things. and then she went ahead and made me feel guilty, again, for wanting to clear things up. i was sick of it all. so then i apologised for what i'd said and tried to act like it never happened. but she didn't let it be, and made me feel horrible. thankfully, the abuse ended once i told her i didn't like it.
i guess eventually, everything at my life came to a climax: my parents were fighting, my crush (who i was emotionally attached to) was distancing themselves from me, i felt like i was a burden, and then all my responsibilities: having to care for both f and z because they were so sensitive, having to try and sort my parents relationship out, the endless pile of assignments building up...that was it. i was fed up. things were pushing at me from every direction to just run away. so i made the plans, and asked a couple of friends to come with me. f was one of them. on the day, only f and i ended up running. i felt guilty after a couple of hours and decided that we should go back. i regret running away. but everything fell apart with z and f after that. z and f became best friends, which i found to be two faced after everything z said about f. i almost accepted it, because f could argue that i pressured her into running away, which i didn't, she even made me promise that we actually were running away. she wanted to run away. she wanted to do something to get her parents to care about her, I suppose. they did care about her, but like any teen, i guess she just didn't see it. as an only child, i couldn't exactly understand what she was going through, my parents weren't overly involved with me, because they didn't have much time. I had no siblings to turn to in times of need. anyway, f goes and lies to z saying that f was the one who decided we were going to return after running away. that was untrue, so when z told me that that was what f had said, i immediately called her out. that wasn't the way it was. but then through some ridiculous miscommunication f ended up thinking that i claimed that it wasn't my initial idea to run away in the first place. of course i would never have done that, but this lie gave f a reason to hate me, in her book, anyway.
i tried multiple times to apologise, but both of them had me blocked on all social medias, and talking to them in person was near impossible. i've always had a problem with giving genuine apologies in person, not because i don't genuinely feel sorry, but because i feel like i cant fully explain or express everything i need to to someone's face. as a result, a whole year passed without any apology from my side. again, i wasn't sure what i was even apologising for, because both of them had also backbited about me and my friends multiple times, even whilst we were sitting right in front of them. both of them had emotionally manipulated me to the point of depression. and still, a couple of weeks ago, i sent an apology. and i was met by z acting like i was trying to steal f from her, which i really couldn't care less about. i just find it extremely frustrating that they are both acting like i am the villain, when they made me go through hell. yet i find it difficult to hold them both to account, either, because i know that they both must be going through stuff, or at least were back then, which caused them to act in the way they did. following my apology, f messaged me saying she couldn't ever trust me again and that she didn't think i was being genuine. i didn't challenge what she was saying, as i was already tired of having to defend myself against z, who i didnt even do anything to. f told me she couldn't unblock me. it's all extremely ironic, because I think I have the right to be upset by everything they've done, yet I smile at them whenever i see them and have never acted rudely to them, even though they both give me dirty looks and tell me to shut up constantly, belittling me as a person, insulting my name, saying my name is ugly, saying that i am a snake etcetera. perhaps they are reflecting their own feelings towards themselves onto me, but its also slightly funny because i remember when f used to compliment my name and say it was really nice. anyway, they both didn't really accept my apology, even though it was genuine. i acknowledged that i had said things that might've hurt f's feelings, but i don't feel responsible to apologise to z at all. i stuck by her through thick and thin, i even helped f out when she was struggling. in their heads, they've found a scapegoat: me. everything is my fault in their eyes. because of their actions, i've genuinely considered the fact that i might actually be a horrible person, but i don't believe that now. after everything they did to me, i apologised to them, and they still didn't even have the decency to accept the apology. in person, i spoke with f privately and i told her that if she has a problem with me because i spoke about her behind her back, she should also have a problem with z. i told her i could send ss proof, but she told me that i could just use the inspect tool and tamper with the messages. they really believe im awful. i'm shocked as to how f could go from liking me so much to hating my guts, especially when i tried so hard to be there for her. i don't know what i should do, i've considered writing an extremely long letter to explain everything from my point of view but i don't think they'll even consider what I have to say. especially not z, who never acts reasonably.

Apologies in advance for all the detail, but I can't find a ton of Google results for our situation. Our first floor bathroom is off a mudroom and ties into our main sewage line. We've lived in our current house for over 2 years and had no issues. A couple weeks after Thanksgiving it backed up. Plunger didn't relieve the backup, but it did eventually drain overnight.
I called a plumber out to see what's going on and they tried plunging and snaking, both of which were unsuccessful. They eventually removed the toilet and tried a few other things before getting the camera out. They were able to unblock it with the camera, but the problem as it was explained to me is that the pipe that ties into our main vertical pipe in the basement was not properly graded and is more level than sloped. As a result, the plumber explained that this will happen every few years until we tear up the floor and fix the problem. They didn't have a jet, so they just left it as is and told us to use it for liquids only until it could be fixed.
Just a month and a half later it backed up again. I find it a little odd after over two years of no issues and a $500+ bill for using a camera to push through the "sludge" blockage it's come back so quickly.
Is this a case where they could do an interior jetting of the pipe? Google seemed to indicate that jetting is more for sewer lines. I guess I'm looking for someone who's had a similar experience or a second opinion. Tearing up the floor isn't in the budget right now. Would a pneumatic plunger or some sort of solvent fix this? Thanks in advance