So I’ve been helping out my mum since she’s been I just got out of hospital with pneumonia and yesterday while I was cleaning my brothers room while he was at college I dropped my phone behind his tv unit I moved it out a bit and found 2 socks that looked absolute filed to the brim they were basically the size of tennis balls so it was easy tell that they had something in them my brothers 16 so I figured it was most likely weed I only assumed that because I tried it when I was his age at college but when I opened them I felt physically sick to my stomach! They were filled with pairs of dirty knickers!!!
At first I thought they might be his girlfriends but when I inspected the tags to see the sizes it confirmed my suspicions there was 5 pairs of knickers sizes 11-12 and thongs size 6 our sisters are twelve and fourteen years old
I put them back where I found them but I have no idea how to bring this up with my brother or possibly my parents
Why the absolute fuck would a 16 year old boy nick his little sisters knickers or even see then in that way?!!
Please some serious advice on how to broach this subject with him or my parents would be highly appreciated!

Shortly before a final paper with pre-assigned topics was due for one of my last courses at Columbia University, our professor sent us an email telling us to forego the previous parameters of the essay, and to instead write about the events that had occurred not even forty-eight hours earlier, as well as our reflections on them, to be done in any manner we chose. Here is a very lightly revised version of what I submitted: read it, ignore it, upvote it, downvote it, hate it, love it.
I am prefacing this essay by stating that it is the culmination of several intense emotions that I have been dealing with over the last few weeks, more specifically, the last several days. It is a free-form expression of the many things occupying my mind, and, as such, it may seem overwhelming or disjointed. Nevertheless, I will do my best to convey my feelings into something representative of my beliefs, and my time at this institution.
My time at Columbia University has been bookended in an almost comically bad way; it started with Zoom classes during the COVID-19 pandemic, and now it ends with Zoom final exams due to the lockdown of Columbia’s campus after protests regarding the Israel – Palestine conflict reached a fever pitch not just within Morningside Campus, but the international stage. My classmates and I missed in-person orientation, and now, given recent developments, we will not have a University Commencement, a fact I found out not from Columbia, but a New York Times alert, somehow lowering my opinion of this administration’s handling of recent events even more. While the circumstances around my time at Columbia have now both begun and finished in the same manner, I am proud to say that I have not. I do not mean that Columbia has simply made me a better writer, a more critical thinker, or more well read, although it certainly has done those things, sometimes forcing me to when I was not particularly in the mood to do so, but those improvements pale in comparison to the maturity and empathy my time at this university has given me.
When the decision to transition to remote learning during the Spring 2020 semester was made, occurring only a short time after I had received my acceptance letter (email), my first thought was how the pandemic would affect my transfer from community college to Columbia in September. Admittedly, this was a selfish perspective, considering the tremendous challenges that many would endure during the ensuing lockdowns and other upheavals of life. My concerns were solely focused on myself because I was on a simple track to graduate, place my degree on my resumé, and continue my trajectory of military service to college to employment, leaving little else to consideration, to include other people who were not in my immediate circle. Sitting here now, two weeks from graduation, with a job at a Fortune 500 company lined up, I should be happy, with the plans I had made years ago coming to fruition. Yet I cannot help feeling a sense of sadness and concern for the school I have spent years of my life at, and for the world as a whole.
James Hatch, a former member of the United States’s elite Naval Special Warfare Development Group, or DEVGRU, for short, more commonly known by its nickname, Seal Team Six, famous for its involvement in the killing of Osama Bin Laden and the rescue of the Maersk Alabama Captain Richard Phillips from pirates, amongst other things, spent over twenty years in the military. After being wounded on a mission to rescue American serviceman sergeant Bowe Bergdahl from enemy forces, he was medically discharged, and would eventually attend Yale University. While there, he wrote a piece titled My Semester with the Snowflakes (please give this a read, it will help people who have never been in the military understand its culture, along with some of the challenges veterans face when transitioning to college), where he details his initial discomfort with being in a vastly different environment than the military, surrounded by individuals who possessed opinions and beliefs contrary to the ones he was accustomed to. He recalls witnessing a student protest the country he spent over two decades serving by coating her hand in red paint, and leaving a palm print on an American flag, and details his shock when a classmate of his explained to him what a “safe space” was, as well as his pride when he began to understand the nuances of life both inside and outside of the nation he dedicated twenty-six years to.
I can relate to Mr. Hatch, (despite my service paling in comparison to his, as well as the fact that Columbia is far superior to Yale), because, like his friends who make fun of him for attending college with a bunch of “snowflakes,” mine do the same. More significantly, however, his personal growth during his time at school is something that I have experienced myself. When I started at Columbia, I did not even know which major I would choose, and was largely lost in a world very different than the one I had come from. Despite this, I made the decision to avoid communities such as MilVets and the students who made it very clear that they came from a military background, with their style of dress and demeanor, not because those organizations and individuals are a detriment; I know for a fact that MilVets has helped countless students succeed at Columbia and beyond, and the veterans that I have relationships with are all phenomenal people, but because I wanted to pressure myself into being exposed to something different. I was uncomfortable at first, but this turned out to be the right decision. I learned as much from simply talking to people whom I would normally never converse with about topics and ideas that I had never encountered as I did during classes about great works of art, polar and Cartesian coordinates, literature, astronomy, the list goes on.
If the protests about the Israel – Palestine conflict had occurred when I first started at Columbia, I would have been frustrated by the students taking up space, forcing us to be funneled on to campus by restricted access points and identification checks. Likely irritated by the disturbance of the quiet during finals season, I would have agreed with the people who called for students to simply focus on their assignments and stop inconveniencing others by shouting about something occurring on the other side of the world. Instead, I decided to learn about the conflict, educating myself about both sides of a war that has roots extending back millennia. While Columbia University did not agree to the demands of the protestors, they achieved something else they surely desired, reaching a goal they did not state to President Shafik and her advisors: they brought attention to their cause by educating at least one additional person about it.
After reading, talking to people, listening to input from students within various classes, and understanding that things such as the intertwined nature of financial workings, as well as conflicts not just in the Middle East, but all over the world, are a level of complexity that baffles some of the most brilliant minds of ours and previous generations, I will leave my thoughts about Israel and Palestine separate from this paper. I recognize that it is important to choose a side, as remaining impartial helps no one. However, when every news agency, group and individual makes their voice heard, satirical sources such as The Onion make these kind of posts, or Adult Swim’s Rick, the nihilistic, narcissistic, psychopathic, misanthropic lead character from the series Rick and Morty, addresses the conflict in this manner, I feel that it is better to relegate myself to a much smaller part of this debate, namely the occurrences on Columbia University’s Morningside Campus.
During basic training for the United States Army, a sense of brotherhood and camaraderie is hammered into recruits’ identities. When you graduate and are assigned to a unit, one where you could be thousands of miles from home on the opposite side of the country, or even in a completely different country, serving on one of the international bases, approaching someone who you have never met before is easy. Talking to them about shared experiences and stories you have in common, and the bonding that occurs, is the product of an indoctrination process and lifestyle that has existed longer than any of us have been alive, and is proof of its effectiveness. This sense of familiarity tends to continue even when one leaves the military. The Veterans of Foreign Wars community is a place for prior servicemembers of all conflicts to share a drink, a laugh, and sometimes a tear. When I go to the Veterans Administration Hospital for periodic check-ups or the occasional injury, men and woman wearing hats commemorating their service during Vietnam waiting for their appointments greet me with a smile and a handshake, as if we have known each other for years. While working at a golf club’s greens department before I transferred to Columbia from community college, a coworker of mine who had served in the Gulf War had heard from our supervisor that I had been in the Army, and he introduced himself to me on my first day, before anyone else, telling me that if I needed anything, I only had to ask. This camaraderie has expanded to encompass not just veterans, but first responders such as firemen, EMT’s, and the police as well.
Underneath the picture on my driver’s license, the word “veteran” is emblazoned next to a star, written in bright red text and all capital letters. I know for a fact that this one-and-a-half-inch indicator has helped me during interactions with law enforcement on multiple occasions. Only earlier this semester, during Presidents’ Day weekend, I went upstate to spend time with my family. While driving back, in an effort to make the seven-hour trip at a reasonable time, I was stopped for going twenty miles-per-hour over the speed limit. The officer who pulled me over, initially reserved, became noticeably more friendly when I handed him my license and registration. Ultimately, he gave me what amounted to a parking ticket for my actions, rather than the point-incurring, heavily fined moving violation he could have charged me with.
The ‘Thin Blue Line,’ as it is known, is a reference to the idea that the police are the barrier between law abiding citizens and criminals, order and chaos. The most common representation of this concept is a black-and-white American flag, with a single blue line in the place where a red or white stripe would normally be. This style has been expanded to include numerous other colors representing other first-responders: green for the military, red and white no longer to be interpreted as the traditional stripes of the American flag, but instead meant to represent the fire department and paramedics, and even grey for corrections officers. Seeing the appropriation of one of the most iconic symbols in the world, one that flies above the White House, schools, homes, national and international events, and even the Moon, I can say, as someone who has been unwillingly entangled within that appropriation, is nothing short of terrifying.
The fact that these entities and their supporters have literally sewn themselves into the fabric of the symbol of our nation makes one think that there is little room for the countless other occupations, aspects and people that make up this country. The idea of the police being the sole protectors of our society is patently absurd, and all one must do is point out the many instances of police brutality occurring over the years to refute it. I find myself thinking of how much power the officer who stopped me just three months ago had over me. Initially, I was happy that I had received a slap on the wrist, but recently I have found myself wondering what if my license did not state that I was a veteran, would he have charged me with a ticket that would have had much more serious implications? What if he was simply having a bad day, and he decided he did not like the look of me, or the color of my car, and I was the one who he ultimately decided to vent his frustrations on? This traffic infraction, an incredibly small incident compared to all the turmoil in the world, one that involves two strangers, supposedly bonded by our professions, on the side of a quiet, New York highway, serves as a metaphor to me, reminding me of the power structures at play on a much larger scale.
On April 22^nd, 2024, I received this email, one of the many Clery Crime Alerts that students are automatically sent. An affiliate of Columbia University had their car stolen at gunpoint by two masked men on Claremont Avenue, not even a five-minute walk from campus. I skimmed the report, and almost immediately forgot about it, recognizing that crime is an inevitability in major cities, and that I needed to start my commute to school. Days later, on the night of April 30^th, 2024, I received another email from Columbia, containing one of the most ominous messages I had ever seen, one that put the kind of fear in my heart that not even the alert of an armed carjacking could. Columbia’s Emergency Management Operations Team, offering no explanations, specifications, or even a greeting or sign-off, wrote in bold letters these three sentences: “Shelter in place for your safety due to heightened activity on the Morningside campus. Non-compliance may result in disciplinary action. Avoid the area until further notice.” Due to the protests on campus during recent weeks, President Shafik testifying before Congress, Columbia’s role as one of the main catalysts for student protests around the country, and the occupation of Hamilton Hall occurring in the earlier hours of that day, it was not hard to figure out what the email was referencing. Over the next several hours, I followed news agencies, remained glued to the Columbia subreddit, and listened to WKCR, in awe of these eighteen- to twenty-two-year-old students putting themselves at risk to deliver on the ground, accurate, unbiased coverage of one of the most significant events in the school’s history.
While tracking the events from multiple perspectives, to include the social media accounts of those near and on campus live streaming them, I held out hope that the university would make good on their promise from several days earlier to not invite the NYPD back, but a frightening picture began to unfold, one that I was intimately familiar with. One WKCR reporter stated that 114^th street had so many officers on it that he could not see the asphalt of the road beneath them, and I knew that the staging area the NYPD had chosen was one of the best routes for moving towards what the military, and presumably law enforcement, would call an ‘objective.’ The officers cleared the smaller ‘objective,’ the largely unoccupied tents in front of Butler, and then moved towards Hamilton Hall, ordering even those not associated with its occupation to disperse, raising my stress levels and likely those of others, as it is rarely a good sign when police do not want their actions recorded and archived. After the initial entry to campus and clearing of areas and people in the immediate vicinity of Hamilton Hall, came the Long-Range Acoustic Device, or LRAD, a device that makes a megaphone sound like a whisper, and one known for its crowd-control potential, capable of producing sounds loud enough to cause damage to ear-drums, nausea, and headaches, ordering individuals to clear away. The NYPD began its execution of tactics in a way that my fellow soldiers and I used to rehearse, tactics I never dreamed that I would witness outside of the military, and certainly not by police officers who vastly outnumbered unarmed students on their own campus. The NYPD created a perimeter, or a ‘second layer of security’ to both provide reinforcements for the officers entering the building, and to prevent the fleeing of what are called ‘squirters,’ or individuals who attempt to escape the building after the raid begins. While the ‘breach’ team moved towards the front doors, using tools from a ‘hooligan kit,’ such as bolt cutters, hand-held battering rams and crowbars, a siege machine was brought in to allow access from a window; when taking over a building, the idea is to overwhelm it from as many different directions as possible to better disorient and overwhelm its occupants. Flash-bang grenades, described as non-lethal, but known to have harmful effects, were thrown inside, presumably before entering any room, hallway, or otherwise enclosed area to minimize the resistance of anyone unfortunate enough to be on the receiving end of what can only be described as an assault on the visual and auditory senses. According to the Manhattan District Attorney, one of the officers inside Hamilton Hall had what is called in the military a “negligent discharge,” meaning his firearm went off unintentionally. While no one was hurt, the question remains why at least one, and more likely, numerous other officers were carrying guns loaded with live ammunition in the first place, when they so drastically outmatched the protestors in numbers and equipment. Additionally, a negligent discharge is an act of incompetence that would result in an active-duty soldier facing serious consequences, and derision from his peers. So far, the officer remains defended by his coworkers, and unpunished by his superiors.
As all this unfolded, I communicated with my friends from the past and present. My friends from the military checked on me to ensure that I was okay, as did my friends from school. The difference in how they viewed these events highlights what I believe is the change in myself that I stated I am most proud of at the beginning of this paper. My friends from the military were commenting that the assertion of order and control by way of militarized tactics was necessary, not concerning themselves with the human toll and destruction of trust that came along with it. Conversely, my schoolmates lamented the brutality and overstepping of boundaries that the NYPD and Columbia’s administration committed, one that turned a place meant to be a beacon of free speech, expression, and ideas, into what is now a police-state with strict control over who enters it.
My education inside and outside the classroom at this institution has challenged, thrilled, and changed me. Sitting here now, at the end of this paper, the end of the semester, and the end of my time at Columbia University, I am left feeling confused and sad regarding recent events, but also hopeful for the future. I know from experience that the students, teachers, and culture of this school have the power to encourage critical thinking and initiate personal growth. If it did those things for me, surely it can do the same for others

my (f19) bf (m20) has been the ideal partner in most ways, and we've only been together for 5 months. i embarrassingly struggle with hating myself and believing he's lying 24/7. but it's so weird because he also seems like the most genuine person in my life? he cares for me when im sick or randomly down, he spends every second he can with me and drives 45 min back and forth to see me after his 12 hour shifts. he brings me flowers and icecream and writes me poems and takes pictures of me. it all seems so movie like. but from the beginning ive noticed some things. first i noticed a girl we'll call 'Megan' blow him up several times. i dug a little and saw they were following each other on every social media, and she had made a spotify playlist for him. i kept my mouth shut and eventually she was gone on everything. I brushed it off. i then i saw him frequently texting a girl 'Katie' on snapchat, and would close out as soon as i showed up. she was his 2nd best friend on snap- behind me. then i saw one of his close girl friend's post pictures on vsco of the back of him walking in a pumpkin patch. they were taken before we met- but felt romantic i guess. then i noticed he was liking a few of his friend's bikini photos. i confronted him and he profusely apologized and unfollowed them etc. i just saw him like some girl flexing in a gym. mirror 2 weeks ago lol. other than those specific things, i just also always notice him on snapchat when im around, and he immediately closes the app. he snapchats these girls throughout the day and i always noticed he has like 450+ messages on imessage. i want to ask him how many girls he's close with/talks to but is that unjustified?? he's going to the navy soon and he talked about getting married etc. he's going to speak to his recruiter tomorrow morning and up im up sick thinking about it and i want to ter him so bad but i feel like im in the wrong here beci he hasn't done anything to truthfully betray my trust and i can't tell if im being crazy

Voice services
Voice Services are integral to modern communication solutions, especially for small businesses with global clientele. These services transmit data over networks, utilizing phone lines, Private Branch Exchange (PBX), and Voice over Internet Protocol (VoIP) systems. VoIP, renowned for its cost-effectiveness and versatility, offers remote-friendly, feature-rich communication options suitable for businesses of any size. It facilitates customer support, internal communication, conferencing, and easy setup of toll-free numbers, making it a preferred choice for businesses worldwide.
Data services
Data Services, particularly broadband options like FTTP (Fibre To The Premises) and FTTH (Fibre To The Home), are pivotal for modern businesses. They facilitate seamless data transfer, empowering companies to leverage online applications, cloud computing, and connected devices. Small businesses benefit from these services for internet access, cloud operations, and real-time data communication, enabling enhanced connectivity with remote workers, improved customer experiences, and effective online marketing strategies.
Internet services
Internet-based communication services offer distinct advantages over traditional methods like landlines and cellular networks. Widely utilized by individuals and businesses, especially in remote work setups, these services enable seamless collaboration. The telecommunication industry increasingly adopts Internet services, providing budget-friendly solutions with advanced features like social media integration, instant messaging, and video conferencing. They require only a stable internet connection, eliminating the need for costly hardware, infrastructure, and dedicated IT support.
Cloud services
Cloud services, a subset of Internet services, have gained prominence, with telecom firms and solution providers offering cloud-based telecom solutions. These services offer scalability, accessibility, cost savings, and remote management capabilities. Ideal for businesses expanding across regions, they streamline operations without the need for additional infrastructure or physical premises, as everything is managed over the cloud.

I’ve been struggling with acne ever since grade 9. It was never really really bad where I considered taking Accutane however it was always there and my parents were always telling me to take it. I exhausted every other option and medication throughout all those years (I just finished my 1st year of uni). I spend thousands of dollars on skin care products and while my face never fully cleared it would go through stages where it cleared enough for me to be okay with it. Fast forward to grade 12, my face really broke out in result to threading it , and it took a big toll on me so I decided to see a dermatologist to ask for tretinoin, which would be my last resort before Accutane.
When I started tret it did clear up my face but not how I wanted. So after about 6 months or more on tret I finally decided to just suck it up and go on Accutane. My brother went on it as well and it cleared his face great and he never noticed any side effects.
It’s been since February 1st 2024 and I’m on my 2 weeks into my fourth month. While Accutane has absolutely cleared my skin amazingly I have been dealing with sooo many effects. My doctor started me on 40mg off the bat (she said the 20mg is kinda pointless derms are saying to just start off 40 to speed up the process).
Month one (40mg): my lips were dry but it wasn’t horrible, I was getting weird chest pains every now and then, my lower back pain was definitely there but wasn’t debilitating, my hair line was slightly thinning, my nose was constantly bloody but not runny it was just like chunks of blood, and my excema flared up majorly. My face is also always flushed and red lol.
Month two (40mg) : same same, my nose started hurting to like touch and push up, it’s started getting stuffy allll the time, back pain was still prominent, excema still really bad, skin very sensitive, my mood went crazy. I started getting less motivated and way more agitated, my patience lowered more than it usually is and I found I was getting angry quicker. I was already depressed lol so i dont know if it made it worse or not cause it’s normal. My hips were extremely tight and sore. And i dont know if this correlated but my nose started to always be moist. Like always wet for no reason. And a lot of farting to be honest.
I also don’t know if this has any correlation but I’m a very active person and Accutane has made me excessively sweaty. I could just be sitting in my bed and my hands will be drenched in sweat which is so out of the ordinary
Pros: Lips were not too dry, face was glowing, I didn’t get much of a purge at all, nose got smaller and eyelashes a little longer, back and chest acne cleared.
Month three and 2 weeks into four is when it got pretty rough. I got started on 60mg and I noticed:
-my lips significantly dryer it’s killing me -my back pain has been absolutely horrible I can barley do anything - major headaches - my hair is so much thinner and fragile in comparison to my usual thick curly hair -my nose is always wet, stuffy, and bloody - my excema is horrible -my skin cut so much easier it was so sensitive and thin - sweaty - same nose shit -my eyes burn a lot and get heavy quicker
Now how I battled these side effects

• dry lips = aquaphor and Vaseline layered -nose nothing -back pain = pills and heating pad and rest
• hair thinning= less heat, fable and mane hair oil every hair day shower, less slick backs, less shampoo, hair masks. It still hasn’t helped much to be honest but I’m hoping it will go back to normal when I’m off it. -excema= prescribed meds and excema relief euricine cream

Stretching hydrating resting and gaslighting myself to believe that it’s not that deep and it’s all a mind game. The side effects will only come if you think of them.
My skin care routine is my holy grail. My face is sooo hydrated and glowy and I honestly give credit to my routine. It’s plain and simple.
Morning - rinse with water and dr.jart moisturizer and clarins sun screen
Night- la Roche pose cleanser, first aid beauty moisturizer, sometimes I put on Mederma scar cream but the absolute must is the la Roche pose c3 balm. That shit Is amazing and I’ve been using it for monthssss.
My predicament is that I’m going back gone to leb in July (their hottest month) and that would also be my last month on this cycle. I really wanna tan and stuff so how bad is the sun on Accutane? Also I’m also considering maybe stopping a month early? Do you guys think that’s a bad idea and will get rid of all my progress?
My doctors said a cycle is 6 months but the derms are saying to do an additional 2 to cement the process. But I don’t want to because if so harsh.
What do you guys think?

I live in NE Mesa. Willing to drive an hour.
Looking for two different tattoos. Could be same artist or different artist.
First tattoo will be color. A band logo. Pretty detailed. Don't want it to just ok. Has to be great and vibrant. Probably about the size of a hockey puck.
Second tattoo will be grayscale. A big piece. Very detailed. Like a detailed statue type with very tight lines and shading.
If money and time were not an issue, where and who would you recommend?
I didn't find anything posted on the last 12 months. Sorry if this is a repeated question by others. This is important to me. Not looking for nice people or a cool shop. Must be the cream of the crop. No home studios.
If possible, let me know what your person charges per hour etc. But not the most important information. I'm assuming for the big piece it's going to range $300 to $450 per hour. The hockey puck in thinking $350 to $500 total.
If you are an artist, feel free to reach out to me.

I have a strong belief that I am autistic. I have autistic friends and they agree with me. I've taken almost all of the online questionnaires and screenings and every. single. one. is on the much higher end. I taken them multiple times, and every time I say to myself "this time you're gonna be completely honest. Really think on each question. Don't exaggerate" and I just get the same if not a higher score than the last time I took it. I know those screenings aren't a definitive, especially for those who are autistic but have more nuanced traits that those questions wouldn't necessarily flag. But considering how consistent, and "stereotypical", for lack of a better word, my answers are, I think its a safe bet to think that it's pretty likely.
I didn't display the usual milestone stuff associated with autism when I was little. What makes this harder specifically with my mom is that I hit developmental milestones early, and was said to be very bright child from the start by most people around me. Noticeably intelligent/"high IQ" etc. but not some sort of young sheldon savant.
It's pretty easy, or at least easier, for me to look back on experiences or how I socialised when I was younger and realise "hey that was probably another indicator that was overlooked", but for my mom there was a lot of stuff, particularly school, that she just wasn't around for and couldn't see like I could. There are some things/stories that "we" (mostly her. I don't remember a ton of early school days other than super profound moments or instances that for whatever reason had a lasting impact emotionally) look back on that when put in the context of possible autism, make a lot more sense. She's told me a bunch about a time where this girl at school (kindergarten I think) refused to talk to me, like I would try and say something to her and she just looked at me and/or completely ignored me. So I kicked her. I was not a violent child, there are a few instances where I got physical with people but, again, looking back I dont think I understood the gravity of my actions. I kept getting drawn to kicking peers. In 80% of cases I did it during recess as some sort of "play" even though now I obviously know that it was harmful and I still feel bad. There were a couple of times someone behind me in line kept stepping on my heel and I had enough so I'd kick them. I think I definitely showed signs as a child but it doesn't help that the most difficult symptoms haven't become prominent until about age 12.
Anyway there are a lot of things like that. More-so things that my mom has always passed off as being because I was a bright or "gifted" kid. The times I've brought up the possibility of autism to her I'm always met with "symptoms of autism are commonly found in gifted kids but that doesn't mean you're autistic" re: feeling disconnected from peers & unable to find common ground etc etc. Either that or it's stuff that she did as a kid too. We both have diagnosed ADD.
I wouldn't feel as much of an intense need for a "real" diagnosis if it wasn't for how I think my autistic traits are affecting our relationship. Ever since I was a kid I'd be yelled at for "sass" or "backtalk". I heard that I was "sassing off" so much that just the word "sass" triggers an intense internal emotional reaction. I never understood what that meant. I would ask, she would kind of explain, but I'd never actually get it. This is the same thing now, except now without my dad here (passed away) it's just us and I feel like I've sort of unintentionally become part of a partnership dynamic rather parent and child (which is confusing as hell sometimes because it's like you're equal, being part of adult conversations and decisions as an adult partner would, and yet held to the same expectations and rules that of a child). There are a lot of times where she's says something like "watch your tone", "stop/you don't have to talk/treat/speak to me this way", "stop yelling at me" with her getting hurt or mad and I rarely, truly understand what exactly I did. Ill ask her "how did I just speak to you" and I feel like she when she repeats it back her tone is exaggerating how I sounded, but then again I don't actually know how I sounded. All I know is that I didn't intend to be mean or disrespectful. I never mean to be disrespectful. If something happens where I did something or haven't been doing something (its a reoccurring breaking point when shes been asking me to do something for weeks and I just don't do it. Unloading the dishwasher specifically. I come home exhausted from school and I just come home, eat something, and then go sit in my room on my laptop for the rest of the night between homework and leisure.) and I just shut down and sit there silently without eye contact until she stops yelling and the interaction kind of "ends" and either she or I walk away to another room alone. I know how it makes her feel and I feel so bad about it, just in the moment there are things in my head that I want to say but its like I cant get them to come out. She sees this as me "stonewalling" her and "refusing to take responsibility". Some arguments she's called me "abusive" for my behaviour, and I can't say I blame her. I know how my behaviour comes across on the outside. To her, I don't listen or do anything around the house, I'm unnecessarily mean and disrespectful most of the time, I talk back and raise my voice a lot. Theres more I cant remember right now. Its more prominent because I don't really act like that around my friends, it's just at home. Its not like its personal to her, I just come home and I guess "unmask."
I wish I could just go to my doctor and say I'm fairly certain I'm on the spectrum and get a referral, and get a diagnosis (in my state autism diagnoses and treatment are required to be covered by insurance if youre under 21) or some other explanation for why I'm like this, and come back to her with something that proves that I don't hate her and I'm not some abusive asshole that likes being a dick. Every time I've brought up autism it gets mostly shut down or passed off as something else or just par of the course for being "gifted". It does not help that she feels that people right now are too quick to jump on the thought they're autistic. I feel like I need a diagnosis, autism or whatever else, in order to save us being able to exist in the same house without me feeling I have to have my guards up and without her feeling like I despise her being around me and that I want nothing to do with her. I am very close to typing up a document with many of the feelings I've written here along with experiences and reasons why I think I'm autistic, along with all of my self assessment scores and answers with explanations for each. I guess I've just hoped I'd be able to do that with a professional there to guide it also but It's just getting to hard to deal with with this hypothetical ideal examination of how my brain works. I guess I'm just on edge and ready for her to dismiss every point I bring up in some way or another or say "what? you weren't like that as a kid".
I didn't mean to go off like this, I appreciate anyone who's read this far. The whole thing just hurts.

I had a django app working a couple days ago. Last night a screwed around and messed up the migrations adn the db. I basically remade the db and the project. I changed the name and the venv, install req's, appended the httpd conf file to match the new venv and project name. Now I cannot for the life of me undestand why wsgi.py is failing to execute. I'm using the same interpreter as the old app, python 3.12. the venv is the same as the old one, made the new one because the old one wouldn;t work. I can't get rid of these errors. I occasionally get the 'phone_field' not found error, 'phone_field' is indeed in INSTALLED_APPS.
All I can think is that the logs say Python3.9 and I'm using 3.12 in the venv.
I can access the app with python ./manage.py runserver locally. So must be the httpd.conf or the WSGI config?
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.393611 2024] [core:notice] [pid 2877189:tid 2877189] SELinux policy enabled; httpd running as context system_u:system_r:httpd_t:s0
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.394134 2024] [suexec:notice] [pid 2877189:tid 2877189] AH01232: suEXEC mechanism enabled (wrapper: /ussbin/suexec)
AH00558: httpd: Could not reliably determine the server's fully qualified domain name, using fe80::4a22:54ff:fe6f:eb43%enp7s0. Set the 'ServerName' directive globally to suppress this message
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.415910 2024] [lbmethod_heartbeat:notice] [pid 2877189:tid 2877189] AH02282: No slotmem from mod_heartmonitor
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.418070 2024] [mpm_event:notice] [pid 2877189:tid 2877189] AH00489: Apache/2.4.57 (Red Hat Enterprise Linux) OpenSSL/3.0.7 mod_wsgi/4.7.1 Python/3.9 configured -- resuming normal operations
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.418080 2024] [core:notice] [pid 2877189:tid 2877189] AH00094: Command line: '/ussbin/httpd -D FOREGROUND'
***** [Wed May 15 22:44:39.980866 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] mod_wsgi (pid=2877193): Failed to exec Python script file '/vawww/html/CRM/python3.12.1-venv/venv312nserp/nserp/nserp/wsgi.py'.
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.980890 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] mod_wsgi (pid=2877193): Exception occurred processing WSGI script '/vawww/html/CRM/python3.12.1-venv/venv312nserp/nserp/nserp/wsgi.py'.
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981169 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] Traceback (most recent call last):
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981188 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] File "/vawww/html/CRM/python3.12.1-venv/venv312nserp/nserp/nserp/wsgi.py", line 16, in
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981190 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] application = get_wsgi_application()
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981192 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] File "/uslocal/lib/python3.9/site-packages/django/core/wsgi.py", line 12, in get_wsgi_application
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981194 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] django.setup(set_prefix=False)
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981196 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] File "/uslocal/lib/python3.9/site-packages/django/__init__.py", line 24, in setup
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981197 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] apps.populate(settings.INSTALLED_APPS)
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981199 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] File "/uslocal/lib/python3.9/site-packages/django/apps/registry.py", line 91, in populate
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981201 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] app_config = AppConfig.create(entry)
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981203 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] File "/uslocal/lib/python3.9/site-packages/django/apps/config.py", line 193, in create
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981204 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] import_module(entry)
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981206 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] File "/uslib64/python3.9/importlib/__init__.py", line 127, in import_module
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981207 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] return _bootstrap._gcd_import(name[level:], package, level)
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981210 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] File "", line 1030, in _gcd_import
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981212 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] File "", line 1007, in _find_and_load
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981214 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] File "", line 984, in _find_and_load_unlocked
[Wed May 15 22:44:39.981219 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877314] [remote 172.69.7.9:9928] ModuleNotFoundError: No module named 'phone_field'
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823149 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] mod_wsgi (pid=2877193): Failed to exec Python script file '/vawww/html/CRM/python3.12.1-venv/venv312nserp/nserp/nserp/wsgi.py'.
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823182 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] mod_wsgi (pid=2877193): Exception occurred processing WSGI script '/vawww/html/CRM/python3.12.1-venv/venv312nserp/nserp/nserp/wsgi.py'.
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823244 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] Traceback (most recent call last):
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823261 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] File "/vawww/html/CRM/python3.12.1-venv/venv312nserp/nserp/nserp/wsgi.py", line 16, in
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823264 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] application = get_wsgi_application()
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823267 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] File "/uslocal/lib/python3.9/site-packages/django/core/wsgi.py", line 12, in get_wsgi_application
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823268 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] django.setup(set_prefix=False)
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823271 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] File "/uslocal/lib/python3.9/site-packages/django/__init__.py", line 24, in setup
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823273 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] apps.populate(settings.INSTALLED_APPS)
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823275 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] File "/uslocal/lib/python3.9/site-packages/django/apps/registry.py", line 83, in populate
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823277 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] raise RuntimeError("populate() isn't reentrant")
[Wed May 15 22:44:40.823284 2024] [wsgi:error] [pid 2877193:tid 2877334] [remote 172.69.7.9:32586] RuntimeError: populate() isn't reentrant

Can someone please offer some perspective? I keep on bouncing back and forth between these two offers and just imagining life as a PCP or as a hospitalist.
Offer 1: PCP: $310k base, $200k sign on, regular bonuses and pension. Most physicians are pulling $330-$350k, M-F, 20 patients per day.
Offer 2: hospitalist: $268-288k base for 12-14 8hr round and go shifts per month. With extras ($700/day per extra on top of base) can push to $360-400k. Easy gig and most docs are working 18 shifts per month. You only work 31% of weekends.
They’re both PSLF, which is what I’m doing.
The thing is….I always dreamed of hospitalist (tbh intensivist) work and I enjoy being in the hospital the most while in residency. I like the idea of more acute work. But this PCP job of a good salary, normal hours, is pretty tempting. I don’t consider the signing bonus as it’s a 7 year commitment. I’ve been doing some soul searching to decide between the two but I need some outside perspective. I feel like I won’t be satisfied unless I’m making $370k plus.
FYI I’m in a VVHCOL area.

Simply from a world building logic perspective I think patrols and mission troop counts should be varied.
The bugs need organic matter to consume in order to grow and breed. For most planets there is organic material for them to consume so it makes sense they have very high troop numbers and very high patrol numbers as the patrols are looking for food. Would be cool that on dead planets like the moon one there is a negative mission modifier impacting the bugs but not the end of the world. They have no ships so no universe supply lines making the bugs be extra aggressive planet side.
The bots however require two distinct inputs metal and brains. They are cyborgs and definitely have to harvest SEAF troops and metals in order to produce more units. So they should in theory have less total volume of troops compared to a bug mission as it’s harder to produce new units, and patrols should be relatively lighter but farther ranging and more dispersed. I think they canonically have space ships so it allows bots to reinforce but in turn this should make them relatively more defensive. Because the unit production of bots takes more destroying fabricators should reduce the end mission volumes and it would be cool to see patrols Bunker and regroup on a position instead of chasing
I know we keep getting edged about the illuminate but I don’t know enough about them. Gut reaction would be between bugs and bots
TLDR: bug easy to make, bug get most troops and most patrols per mission. Bug no have spaceship to reinforce so bug ultra resource aggressive bug high command no retreat or regroup during mission.
Bot hard to make. Bot get less troops and patrols. Bot have spaceship so bot planet can be reinforced. Bot high command then not ultra aggressive and will tactically retreat to regroup. Means destroy fabricators and less bot to fight at end of mission.
Any discussion not 100% backing this analysis will be shared to your local democracy officer

I been enjoying betting with DraftKings because of some of the bet lines. Easy enough if you study the games.
If you don’t have DraftKings sign up with this link for a $50 bonus bet when you deposit $5 and make a bet
https://sportsbook.draftkings.com/sb/qbuck3043/US-MI-SB

Cardinals (18-25) @ Angels (16-28)

First Pitch: 6:07 PM at Angel Stadium

Team	Starter	TV	Radio
Cardinals	Lance Lynn (1-2, 4.17 ERA)	BSMW	KMOX
Angels	Griffin Canning (2-4, 5.21 ERA)	BSW	KLAA

Game Preview
/angelsbaseball Discord
Reddit Stream for this post

Line Score - Game Over

	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	R	H	E	LOB
STL	0	0	0	0	0	1	0	1	0	2	9	1	11
LAA	4	0	0	0	0	1	2	0		7	14	0	9

Box Score

LAA		AB	R	H	RBI	BB	SO	BA
1B	Schanuel	4	1	2	1	1	0	.244
3B	Guillorme	3	1	2	0	2	1	.237
LF	Ward	5	1	2	1	0	2	.269
DH	Calhoun, W	5	2	3	1	0	1	.319
RF	Pillar	3	1	2	1	0	1	.328
C	O'Hoppe	4	0	0	0	0	3	.260
CF	Moniak	4	0	1	1	0	1	.186
SS	Neto	4	1	2	1	0	0	.250
2B	Paris	3	0	0	0	1	1	.125

LAA	IP	H	R	ER	BB	SO	P-S	ERA
Canning	6.0	5	1	1	3	5	99-65	5.21
Moore	1.0	0	0	0	2	2	34-21	6.19
García, L	1.0	3	1	1	0	2	24-14	5.19
Estévez	1.0	1	0	0	0	1	16-12	5.68

STL		AB	R	H	RBI	BB	SO	BA
DH	Carpenter	4	0	0	0	1	2	.259
RF	Nootbaar	4	0	2	0	1	0	.206
1B	Goldschmidt	4	1	1	1	1	2	.206
3B	Arenado	5	0	0	0	0	2	.258
LF	Burleson	4	1	2	0	0	0	.280
C	Herrera	3	0	1	0	1	1	.276
2B	Donovan	4	0	2	1	0	1	.227
SS	Winn	3	0	1	0	1	1	.281
CF	Siani	3	0	0	0	0	1	.232

STL	IP	H	R	ER	BB	SO	P-S	ERA
Lynn	5.0	8	4	4	2	5	106-64	4.17
Robertson	1.2	6	3	3	0	3	39-31	3.86
Roycroft	1.1	0	0	0	2	2	33-21	1.80

Scoring Plays

Inning	Event	Score
B1	Nolan Schanuel homers (4) on a fly ball to right field.	1-0
B1	Willie Calhoun doubles (7) on a sharp line drive to right fielder Lars Nootbaar. Luis Guillorme scores. Willie Calhoun to 3rd. Willie Calhoun advances to 3rd, on a throwing error by shortstop Masyn Winn.	2-0
B1	Kevin Pillar singles on a ground ball to first baseman Paul Goldschmidt, deflected by pitcher Lance Lynn. Willie Calhoun scores.	3-0
B1	Mickey Moniak strikes out on a foul tip.	4-0
T6	Paul Goldschmidt homers (4) on a fly ball to right center field.	4-1
B6	Zach Neto homers (4) on a fly ball to left field.	5-1
B7	Taylor Ward homers (8) on a fly ball to left field.	6-1
B7	Mickey Moniak singles on a line drive to left fielder Alec Burleson. Willie Calhoun scores.	7-1
T8	Brendan Donovan singles on a sharp ground ball to left fielder Taylor Ward. Alec Burleson scores.	7-2

Highlights

Description	Length
Griffin Canning against the Cardinals	0:07
Lance Lynn against the Angels	0:09
Bullpen availability for Los Angeles, May 15 vs Cardinals	0:07
Bullpen availability for St. Louis, May 15 vs Angels	0:07
Bench availability for St. Louis, May 15 vs Angels	0:07
Fielding alignment for St. Louis, May 15 vs Angels	0:11
Bench availability for Los Angeles, May 15 vs Cardinals	0:07
Fielding alignment for Los Angeles, May 15 vs Cardinals	0:11
Starting lineups for Cardinals at Angels - May 15, 2024	0:09
Nolan Schanuel: Home Run Statcast Analysis	0:12
A deep dive into Nolan Schanuel's home run	0:11
Paul Goldschmidt: Home Run Statcast Analysis	0:12
A deep dive into Paul Goldschmidt's home run	0:11
Breaking down Lance Lynn's pitches	0:04
Measuring the stats on Zach Neto's home run	0:12
Lance Lynn's outing against the Angels	0:23
A deep dive into Zach Neto's home run	0:11
Breaking down Griffin Canning's pitches	0:04
Griffin Canning's outing against the Cardinals	0:23
Measuring the stats on Taylor Ward's home run	0:12
Visualizing Taylor Ward's swing using bat tracking technology	0:11
Griffin Canning whiffs Matt Carpenter with a fastball	0:06
Nolan Schanuel laces a solo home run to right field	0:29
Willie Calhoun hits an RBI double to right-center	0:28
Kevin Pillar scores Willie Calhoun with an RBI single	0:27
Lance Lynn gets Taylor Ward to swing for a strikeout	0:07
Kevin Pillar makes it home after a wild pitch	0:14
Alec Burleson nails a long throw for a double play	0:13
Paul Goldschmidt leaps to his left for a snag	0:22
Alec Burleson ranges into foul territory for a catch	0:25
Paul Goldschmidt swat a solo home run to right-center	0:26
Michael Siani dives down for a fantastic catch	0:20
Zach Neto lifts a solo home run to left field	0:27
Mickey Moniak goes to ground for a great catch	0:17
Taylor Ward thumps a solo homer to left field	0:27
Mickey Moniak brings in Willie Calhoun with a single	0:10
Brendan Donovan plates Alec Burleson with an single	0:15
Griffin Canning rings up five Cardinals hitters	0:47

Decisions

Winning Pitcher	Losing Pitcher	Save
Canning (2-4, 5.21 ERA)	Lynn (1-2, 4.17 ERA)

Game ended at 9:07 PM.

I am a long-time Boss fan, so I was pretty sure I would like the sounds, and indeed I do. But it goes beyond that. I had a ME80, a GX100 and a bunch of Boss standalone pedals (and also a Line 6 Pod, a Headrush 5 and the headrush full size).
Things I absolutely love in the ME90:

1. the AIRD modeling is *way better* than COSM, which I always thought was already pretty good to start with.
2. the latency is close to zero.
3. the bluetooth control from my iPad is also instantaneous, while loading a patch with on the GX100 could take 5 seconds.
4. I love that Boss added the feedback and their Klon clone.
5. and as easy to edit on the fly than its venerable predecessors of the ME series. At the end of the day, that's what took me back from menu-driven multi effects. With 3 tuning per effect, I got all the flexibility I need.

Thing I don't like so much in the ME90 :

1. the very short delays. A maximum delay time of 800ms is probably gonna work for most, but I really loved the longer delays of the ME80, in particular the 6 seconds delay that I could use for Frippertronics and prog-rock pleasantries. . No such thing with the ME90, I have to use my looper DittoX4 as a delay pedal. It works, but I really long for the past long delays of the ME series.

All in all, I am *very* happy with the ME90.

Tier List: https://imgur.com/a/8uZCpGy
Oh boy, is this one gonna be a can of worms. Let's dive in headfirst!
"I'll school you in this battle of the baddest Bruce, with your He-Man haircut and your Daisy Dukes." It's an unremarkable line, but the rhythm here is pretty kickass, and I love the choregraphy of Jenner doing stretches in time with the beat, it's a really satisfying visual. "I hear you're good at running, you're just like the Flash. Especially in the 100-meter ditch-your-wife dash." Decent attack. They never fail to use someone getting divorced as material for a diss, do they? Banner looming over his beakers and microscope is a nice visual, and "You turned one gold medal to a lifetime of green; the most overrated athlete anyone's ever seen" is a competent enough attack. "You need to carry fatherhood across that finish line; kept up with the Kardashians but left some kids behind" is, again, a decent enough diss. A lot of material about Jenner's family here; I guess that's to be expected. There's still one or two much more obvious lines of attack to make, but I suppose Banner is just saving his best stuff for the end, right? He certainly wasn't saving it for the end of this verse, in which he just references the fact that he transforms when he gets pissed off without fashioning it into much of an attack or boast. The use of strings in the music here is a really nice touch, although I'd say the green screen effect with Bruce standing in front of those neurons or whatever ain't looking so hot.
Actually, the green screen effects for this battle broadly aren't the best. That stadium Jenner's standing in is looking pretty low-res. "I think you're in your element when you're behaving badly; honestly you're kind of boron when you're happy." It's a corny pun, but the sentiment is true enough. "I'll lap and pass your ass ten different ways. Decathlon athlete blast through you like some gamma rays." This is filler; it's fine, rhythm sounds pretty good, but it's just taking up space. "The truth is there's no truce between the Bruces, you're a drifter being useless, I'm a winner, no excuses!" That's a lot of playing on the same rhyme in a short period of time, and I dig that: truth/truce/Bruces/useless/excuses, hell yeah. I guess some of those aren't proper rhymes so much as, what's the word... assonance, maybe? It's good writing, is the point. The visuals panning in and out of this home gym is a nice touch too, and a nice parallel to Banner's sequence with his lab. "Beatiful women all up on my jock, I got a home gym, check me on the cereal box, Doc!" The rhythm Jenner's spitting here rules, this beat is low-key one of the better ones they've done. It's also a nice boast, and that Wheaties visual is pretty great. "You big green freak, don't try to flex; if it wasn't for your cousin, you'd never have sex!" Okay, this line goes super hard and I think it's one of the most underrated ones in ERB history. AND it's got one of the funniest visuals in the way Jenner pops in on that roller shouting "OHH!" while Banner suffers. That bit lives rent-free in my head. "You're so strong when you get mad, too bad you can't go back to protect your mom from your dad!" Holy fucking SHIT, this goes hard! The flow here kicks all kinds of ass, and we've got a 3x rhyme combo going on with mad/bad/dad; I LOVE odd numbers of rhymes! It's also just an extremely savage low blow. Another line that doesn't get enough credit. Jenner is kicking Banner's ass so far.
One questionable and inadvisable transformation sequence later, The Hulk comes in to spit a few bars. But only a few. "That painted face don't give you class; just one more thing Bruce do for cash!" Interesting argument. "Best thing you make? Kylie ass! She eighteen? Hulk SMASH!!" I do think this is a pretty funny way to reduce Jenner's legacy to Kardashian bullshit, and the Hulk SMASH joke always gets a strong reaction out of people.
Fully transitioned Caitlin Jenner comes in with "That's my teenage daughter, man, I have to forbid this; I'll put a javelin through your jolly green discus." Decent lines. Good way for Caitlin Jenner to brag about her athletic achievements while also throwing a Jolly Green Giant jab in. "Kylie not the kinda girl I'm gonna let you smash on; you'll get the medal without the decathlon!" I like the medeal/metal wordplay here, although Caitlin Jenner dual-wielding pistols and firing them at the Hulk feels extremely out of left field.
"Hulk is Hulk! No identify as man! Me thinks Cait might understand!" Pretty funny line, and Caitlin's reaction is also amusing. "No gender issue; this Jenner issue! Just you being you is enough to diss you!" So that's it, then? They're really not going to bring that one thing up, eh? I feel like that closing line would land a lot better if they did.
"Look I understand that you hate yourself; but you don't need to blame yourself." Oh, huh. That's different. Let's see where this therapy session goes. "You're a tiger, stop trying to tame yourself; you gotta be big enough to contain yourself." Well... I like that she's mixing things up by rhyming with the penultimate word instead of the last word, that's always something. They're clearly going for an angle of Caitlin relating to Bruce and trying to teach him to come to terms with his identity, which is kind of cute, I guess. "Be green, it ain't none of my business!" That line's pretty funny, as is the tea-sipping visual. "But if you think you're looking good in those torn-ass clothes; you're lying, which means you need a new wardrobe!" That's a reference to The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, which has absolutely nothing to do with this matchup. Feels out of place because of it. And it's not a very strong diss besides, feels like padding. Doubly strange to end her verse on it. "The visions of those shorts kinda scarred me; what'd you just rage at a Barney themed party?" Oh, there's more? Alright. This burn is really lame. Barney jokes? Come aaaaaaaahhhhhn, what are we doing here? That line should have definitely been left on the cutting room floor. "That's probably not something you seen as a child; not one day did you see your daddy smile!" Okay. She already established that Hulk's father was abusive in her first verse, and while it was a powerful blow there, here it feels much more toothless. "Hulk not strong enough to deal with denial! Laying you down easy; that's kitchen tile!" The first line is pretty amusing with how Caitlin imitates The Hulk's speech, but that second line... why? Pretty weaksauce way to finish her performance off, but whatever. Also not a fan of these visuals with the diamonds, feels like they wanted to add some visual flair but couldn't think of a good way to do it so they settled on Caitlin popping out of diamonds which is just odd. "Examine this under your microscope; you've got no neck, but you still fucking choked!" Oh. This verse is still going? Okay. Well, it's a good line. "After battling me, you're gonna always be pissed! So the Hulk will stay forever, neither Bruce will exist!" You know, that's actually a pretty strong closer, but I can't help but feel like it's undercut by just how long that verse was dragging on.
Okay, so. I feel it should be pointed out that there's a lot of people who were always going to hate this battle for making the decision not to attack Caitlin for being trans. Furthermore, the overwhelming sentiment has been that Banner won this; it bears keeping in mind that there's a lot of transphobes out there who were going to say the Hulk won no matter what happened simply because Caitlin is trans. So to that end, I think that a fair amount of the hate this battle gets, and the hate that Caitlin's performance gets, is bullshit. But there are still some big criticisms that need to be made.
So let's be honest: they threw the match for Caitlin. Or at least attempted to. You might still think the Hulk managed to win, but with that insanely long final verse it's pretty clear they tried to make Caitlin the 'canon' winner, as with Thomas Jefferson vs. Frederick Douglass. They did this presumably because it was pride month, and they wanted to say Trans Rights with a trans rapper that gets a positive portrayal. I can get behind that sentiment, but the execution is questionable to say the least.
Like... I'm not trans, but there's some shitty stuff going on here that's easy to see. For one, the cardinal rule that everybody knows is that you're not supposed to misgendedeadname a trans person, and the title of this battle is Bruce Banner vs. Bruce Jenner. So from the get-go, before the video even starts playing, we're getting some mixed signals here. Are we to take from this that they made the tactical decision to go ahead and deadname Caitlin for the sake of the matchup making intuitive sense(what with it obviously being a play on their similar names), and then try and do a hard pivot and make Caitlin win the battle to avoid criticism for that decision? Feels like maybe they could have just not gone with this matchup instead. The whole transformation element also seems dubious, but I could see someone reasonably landing either way on whether that's actually an issue or just silly fun, so I won't go into that.
Another issue to consider: Caitlin Jenner kind of sucks. Most people do not like her. Most TRANS people don't even like her. For one, despite the fact that she's trans, she is a Republican who has made anti-gay marriage comments in the past. The bizarre shittiness of a trans person being like that is a pretty ripe source of material for disses, yet this battle does not bring it up at all. And more notably than that, Caitlin Jenner was famously involved with a manslaughter case, where she was accused of getting someone killed due to negligent driving. It was ultimately determined that there wasn't enough evidence for manslaughter and so she wasn't found guilty(though it's widely believed that this decision was bullshit and she did commit manslaughter), but it's an extremely well-known and controversial factoid and it's insane they didn't have Banner bring up as a diss. If you're going to have a rapper make the case of "Just you being you is enough to diss you", seems like being a trans Republican and quite possibly committing vehicular manslaughter are the two strongest and most obvious points to go with. And yet... nothing. If your goal to make a battle that gives trans people positive representation, I feel like Caitlin Jenner seems like a pretty poor choice. I get that there aren't a lot of choices for a trans rep with name recognition or ample material to work with, but... the Wachowski sisters are right there.
Another thing is... why is it a moral imperative that Caitlin win this battle? Sure she's trans, and it's cool want to give trans people positive representation, but you didn't need to give her an absurdly long verse at the end to do that. You could just give her good writing, refrain from shitting on her just for being trans, and sure, let her have the final word. Then, yes, show the pride flag at the end to say Trans Rights. That's all you had to do. With something like Jefferson v. Douglass the scale-tipping made sense, because it was a slave-owner vs. a slave. Yeah, it's kind of hard for the slave-owner to win that match, and it makes sense to use it as a vehicle to take a firm stand against slavery. But it's not like this battle is Trans Person vs. Transphobe; Bruce Banner isn't some horrible person that must be morally condemned(there's a much stronger case for Caitlin herself), so... why have it play out like this? I think that ironically, by trying to hand the match to Caitlin they wound up getting more hate thrown towards the performance and more people voting against her in polls than there otherwise would have been if they'd just cut out all that excessive padding and given her a solid closing verse. As-is the verse isn't good, the overall quality is dragged down by just how much fluff there is.
In the end, my read on the situation is this: for whatever reason, they really liked the idea of this matchup and wanted to go through with it. They knew that going through with it would necessitate making it Bruce Banner vs. Bruce Jenner at the start, so they bit the bullet on the deadnaming and the conceit for the matchup and did everything they could to mitigate the potential backlash for that, going as soft on Caitlin as possible and giving her a verse that was ridiculously lengthy. People always say "but it's the Hulk, it makes sense he wouldn't say much!" and sure, I can buy that as an excuse as to why Caitlin's verse would be longER than his, but that still doesn't account for why it's as insanely long as it is. In any case... this paragraph is just speculation, I can't know their actual motivations, but I think this is likely what happened.
Anyway... despite all, this battle gets way too much hate. I think Jenner's first verse is really good, and the Hulk is also quite solid for as few lines as he gets. Bruce Banner is a little mediocre and Caitlin's last verse ends up just being a pain in the ass to sit through(could've been good if they cut all the fat and left in the handful of good lines) that's best skipped past on repeat listens. But still... there's some stuff here that is thoroughly enjoyable. I don't think this battle quite manages to be good, but it's got enough going for it that I think it manages to avoid being outright bad. I'm putting this in the top of C tier, because I genuinely think it's more enjoyable than all of the battles that are below it.
It's understandable to say that The Hulk beat Jenner's second verse, but I think her first verse was pretty fire and the highlight of the battle. I think she edges out a win, but a case could be made either way.
Let me end things off by saying this: I once watched this battle with an extremely transphobic relative, and he was pissed off by that "no gender issue, this Jenner issue" line. So even if this battle was a regrettable mistake, at least they did something right.

I’ve been reading everyone’s incredibly moving posts over the last 2 months, thanking Rooster Teeth for the years of entertainment and for helping them find joy and belonging. After reading all these stories of how Rooster Teeth has changed your lives, I wanted to share mine.
Today is incredibly surreal. My last day at RT was this past weekend, but today our website shuts down- 21 years of content, of memories - going to that farm to play with all the other old content sites. At times it feels like I’ve spent my whole life being entrenched in RT, and at others it feels like 21 years flashed by me in the blink of an eye.
December 12, 2011 was my very first day at Rooster Teeth - just over 7 years after I joined the community website in October of 2004. I remember getting ready to go into the office on that first day… what should I wear? Are people going to be happy that I’m there? Will I be accepted? Do I even deserve to be here? Am I going to fuck this all up?
Jury’s still out on a lot of those questions, but it’s safe to say I definitely fucked up - a lot. I’ve done and said many things that I greatly regret. But like all of you reading this, I am not the same person I was over a decade ago. 5 years ago. 1 year ago. Yesterday. I am proud to have grown up, and to have become who I am with the help of this community.
There were a lot of low points over my time at RT. It’s not easy to put yourself out there in front of millions of people. On the Internet. There were many days I wanted to leave; where it just became too much for me to handle. But my colleagues and friends always had my back, and so did a lot of you. I will never forget those of you who supported us through our highest highs and lowest lows. My time at RT wasn’t always easy, but you all made it worth every second of it.
Saying goodbye to Rooster Teeth is something I knew, realistically, was inevitable – something I knew I would have to do eventually. It’s truly heartbreaking to be here writing this, experiencing it, realizing I never truly prepared myself for it. I know a lot of you feel the same way, and I’m sorry. It’s a very unique kind of grief.
Despite it all, the one feeling I’m left with as these days get further behind us is overwhelming gratitude. Gratitude for getting to make you all laugh (or groan, depending on one’s enjoyment of puns); gratitude for the countless opportunities to learn new things, meet new people, and travel the world; and gratitude for getting to do this with the coolest fucking people on earth.
Today, RoosterTeeth.com closes its internet doors, leaving one final goodbye message. I am honored to have helped write that final message- I hope it stands as a reminder of the joy Rooster Teeth once brought you.
As we move into this next chapter of post-RT life, I hope you’ll still be looking out for what we all do next. We love what we do too much to let this stop us, and hope you’ll be there to support in whatever ways you can.
Good things come to an end, but what good is it if we don’t look back and see all the beauty and joy it brought us? If you take just one thing away from all of this, I hope it’s newfound gratitude for the good in your life, and recognizing it before it’s gone - because sometimes it might last 21 years, but feels like it’s gone in the blink of an eye.
Thank you for spending your years with us.
What a gift it was.
Barbara

The wife and I have sold our extra cars (had 4 at one point) and now down to just 2. I have a truck. 2011 gmc sierra 1500 and she has an 07 corolla. Both are pretty reliable but we are looking to purchase a newer car (mostly for her and I’d use the corolla for a beater work car)
Budget around 12-15k but the lower the better lol. We were thinking an SUV with AWD would be nice for winters but I keep changing my mind. I’m mostly looking for something simple, easy to work on myself but also have some features our base models don’t have now.
We’re looking at Subaru crosstrek or maybe an outback but I know nothing about them. They can be had with the features we want for much less then a comparable Toyota. I work on trucks/heavy equipment for a living and either owned pickups or Toyota cars. We are open to another car a Corolla or a Camry as awd is not really necessary for us. More important things we (I mean she) wants is heated seats, sunroof, backup camera, Bluetooth, etc. I only really care about having to work on it. Are Subaru a bad option or I thought most of the CVT Problems have been fixed? A 4th gen rav4 can kinda be in the budget but higher miles. Most of vehicles would be 2013 or newer she’s looking at not really my cup of tea I like older with less electronics and crap to go wrong.

WTS. try to get quick sell. trade interest is null grace and i will top cash depends on condition. All are OBRO. YOLO>DM. payment prefer ppff.
Timestamp
🟢 🔪 SV 799 774 firm final drop Remi lavialle new hardy burlap micarta - at least second owner. catch and release. clipless version. totally french elegant. New hardy is best ergonomic on Remi’s model. stonewash finish. Solid lock up. great action. and easiest front fliper deployment i ever experienced. you can see from the video. how easy was it. the detent is also at middium very sweet. No lock stick. dead center at the same time very good action show in video. No major sign of use when I get. And it stay the same. edge seems unused. RWL34 steel blade. polished spacer have nice contrast with stonewashed linner. no box. Came with remi business card and his hand writing.
🟢 ⌚️ SV $525 King seiko KS 5626-7040 - at least 2nd owner. bought from ebay a store only sell vintage seiko in australia. i can go find order detail if buyer need that. it is with some sign of use for its age. but in very good condition. functionalwise it is 100%. hands are all close to mint. dial is close to mint except a tiny line shows arround 4pm only can see it at certain angle of light. other than that its perfect. time marks and glass all without scratch. back side is alots of scratch and that is expected. leather band are very new. i think i only wore it 3 days in my entire 3 years of ownership. no box. watch keep good time. WATCH GUYS welcome to comment how much these should gone for currently. (Those go around 700 on eBay) it kept good time and all time date set function are correct.
🟢 ⚙️ SV $68 Spyderco PM2 honeycomb scale + g10 scale + ti spacer bundle - at least 2nd owner. for both scale are very good condition. for honeycomb scale. no visible sign of use on show side. clip side only have the sign at where clip make contact to scale. honeycomb one is from etsy list at $69. Material is aluminum. fit and finish all good. lanyard hole came on and off easily, blade centered and action well. spacer from amazon for 35. G10 is close to mint condition. Ti spacer is no sign of use on it.
🟢 ⚙️ SV $45 Hinderer xm 18 3.5 skinny parts - 2nd owner. only install once condition. includes： lockbar stablizer & screw , standoffs, handle screws, nut set, pivot screw, liner & tan g10 scale

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/ThrowRa-Lunch
Originally posted to relationship_advice
My (38F) Husband (39M) hid having lunch with a coworker (25F) and said my food was ‘tasteless’. What do I do?
Trigger Warnings: emotional affair, verbal abuse, emotional abuse and manipulation
Original Post: May 5, 2024
I want this to be quick. I feel really weird about this and I’m on the verge of asking for a separation.
So, I’ve been with my husband for 15 years, married for 11. Amazing relationship, small bumps of course but nothing like this.
I’ve always made lunch for my husband to take to work, and up until a little over a month ago that was fine. Middle of March he said that a new Turkish food stand opened up outside of his office and that he had been eating lunches there instead because they were good. Alright, no problem.
So he just completely stopped asking for lunches. I had maybe packed 5 during this time frame for him, but I’m not even sure he was eating them now.
So on Thursday I was at home working and I had a phone call from him, thought he was calling during his lunch but he had butt dialled me instead.
At first, I didn’t hear much, just him talking to someone, and I was about to hang up until I heard a woman’s voice as well. I wouldn’t say I’m a jealous person, but I was a little bit curious so I muted my call at work and listened.
It was just standard conversation at first, he was praising this woman’s cooking A LOT. Which of course made me realise that he was eating lunch this coworker made. I was a bit peeved but there’s an explanation sure.
Although that went out the fucking window when she said “is it better than your wife’s?” To which he replied “Oh yeah, without a doubt. I mean, it’s not tasteless for a start” followed by laughing.
First of all, what the fuck is that supposed to mean? 15 years of cooking and NOW he has a complaint? And not even to me but some coworker!!
Also, that absolutely isn’t innocent on her end right? I’m not crazy in thinking that’s so weird, why even bring me up?
Anyway, I raised hell, ended the call, sent him a message not to ‘worry about my tasteless cooking anymore’ and that he ‘can eat from the bin’ from now on.
Hes apologised, said that he loves my food and was just trying to seem cool in front of his coworker. I asked why he lied about where he was getting lunch from, and he said that initially he did get it from that stand, but the coworker started offering and he didn’t want to tell me because he thought that I would get jealous (yeah, can you blame me?)
So, I’ve been airing him since. I’m still pissed to be honest, I haven’t made him lunch or dinner, only for myself since he said that he dislikes it so much. He said today that he’s apologised and that I shouldn’t keep punishing him but I’m literally an inch from going to my mums. I have a suitcase with my clothes packed under our bed ready.
Dad thinks it was a stupid comment, but that I should work it out, mum is on my side regardless of my decision. I’m thinking about leaving for a few days at least, maybe a separation but I honestly just want some reassurance if that’s what’s best here?
Relevant Comments
OOP on if this was a one-off situation

OOP: It’s a one off and so insanely weird coming from him. He’s never been that type of person at all. I can’t remember a single time hes said something negative about me to myself, never mind to someone else!
He hasn’t been suspicious with his phone of behaviour at all. He comes home on time and if he’s out with friends I can pretty much confirm it, so I’m not sure. Maybe at most an emotional affair or a crush? But at the moment I don’t think he’s cheating. I honestly just feel really hurt

OOP on if her husband can cook or not

OOP: He can barely cook, so it’d be more of a punishment for me to be honest. I’ve been making him cook for himself since this happened and he’s been miserable. Definitely agree with the asshole coworker though, no clue why she had the audacity to try and bring me up like that

I didn’t know. Yeah he’s apologised, but I’m still pretty hurt over it. Cooking for 15 years just to have him badmouth me sucks. Ideally I want him to cut ties with that coworker of his too for bringing me up. He won’t mention much of her but I feel like she’s just as bad too.
I’m also pretty annoyed he lied to me for a month about the fact that he was eating lunch with this coworker, her lunch too. I don’t see why he would

Blue-eagle-23: Has he agreed to stop having lunch with her? Even if she is not hoping to get with him she is certainly not a supporter of your relationship.

OOP: He said that he’ll stop having lunch with her and apparently has done since that happened. (Although I have no way of proving this)

the_taco_life: If he's not cheating on you with his much younger coworker, he wants to/is trying to. Man my vagina would dry up and blow away in a puff of dust over such classic creepy older dude behavior.
You're not overreacting. You're under reacting.

OOP: I absolutely feel it drying up already. It’s like everything I’ve found attractive in him has gone. He’s just so plain to me now.

issa_username29: Yeahhhh honestly I’d probably leave for at least a couple of days too, overhearing something like that would piss me off! Has he been weird with his phone or any other communication devices?

OOP: Absolutely nothing! No change in behaviour either. He hasn’t been cagey or weird, he’s let me use his phone whenever before all of this happened. He’s been completely normal

 
Update May 7, 2024
I’m back. It’s not a great update but you all deserve one for all of the advice you gave me on my last post.
He confirmed that he developed a crush on her, it’s an emotional affair at least and that’s all I really need to hear. I sat him down and had a heart to heart with him.
Bottom line are these points.

• if I hadn’t of heard what he said, he most likely would have continued flirting with her, he admitted this himself.
  
• he liked the attention, she had bad mouthed me previously (I didn’t ask for examples) and he didn’t shut it down because he liked it.
  
• She has actively been persuing him for over 3 months now, he hadn’t put a stop to it until I caught him.
  
• The Saturday before last she offered to give him a blowjob during lunch together, he declined, but he told me that he let her feel his muscles over his clothes.
  

The only reason he said all of this fucking shit was because I was all sweet and I said “I promise, tell me the full truth and we can move on, I’ll forgive you, I just want to know”
Right, fuck that. He is packing his bags. This is MY house, and it will be treated as such. I really don’t care anymore. If he’s seriously deluded himself into thinking this is going to last, he can crack on.
I’m genuinely so angry more than anything. I did everything for him. I make double what he does so I paid all the bills, while we used his money for fun stuff. When we met he had crippling CPTSD and body dysmorphia. I did fucking everything to help him get over it. I dealt with his night terrors every bloody night, despite it ruining my sleep. I reassured him constantly despite not getting it back. All of it without a bloody complaint. You love someone so much just for them to throw you away so easily.
He cried, had a panic attack that I had to calm him down from and is now taking his time packing. He keeps stopping to come into the living room to ask for a hug. I can’t even express how disgusted I feel, like I physically can’t even look at him anymore.
There was no need, if he was unhappy he should have told me, I don’t know why the hell he even felt the need to get some validation from this girl but sure, whatever.
He keeps saying he doesn’t know why he did it, but of course he knows, he’s just too much of a coward to tell me.
Well whatever, it’s done now. He’s leaving, his family is back in Germany so fuck knows who he’s staying with, probably her but I’m washing my hands of him.
Thank you for all of the advice you gave me on the last post, so many great ideas that I didn’t even end up needing to use because he just down right admitted it all to me.
Relevant Comments
Katatonic92: Doesn't know why he did it? Here's my guess based on the info you shared;

1. You saw him at his weakest & most vulnerable, you are clearly still his backbone judging from his current behaviour. He doesn't get to play the toxic image of manly man to you, in his mind, you are stronger than him. I guarantee he hasn't opened up to her about any vulnerabilities he has, it sounds like she has appealed to the toxic manly man ideal of making food & offering blowjobs to the big, strong muscular man. He gets to inflate his ego in a way he can't with you.
2. Not only have you emotionally supported him, you are also the main breadwinner, the provider. You cover the bills, the roof over your head, his contribution is the unnecessary fun stuff. This is yet another blow to the toxic manly man's fragile ego. He probably considers himself financially superior to her, his money could hold more "value" to her instead of it just being fun money you won't really miss.
3. He is older than her, gets to seem like the wiser, more worldly adult of the relationship. He will feel superior to her in every way he feels inferior to you.
4. He enjoyed the negative comments made about your food, not because they were necessarily true but because it meant you weren't perfect & someone else was validating it. Again, when you are insecure it is easier to find faults be derogatory towards a perceived threat to drag them down, instead of building themselves up.

Conclusion. Major insecurity, inflation of ego from someone he feels he holds superiority over. And as fucking usual, instead of recognising this bullshit, speaking to his wife who has done nothing but love & support him, go to see a therapist to work on his feelings, he goes down the easy road. Instead of doing the work to overcome his feelings of inadequacy, it was so much easier to gravitate to someone who not only let him ignore those feelings for a while, they also found a way to tear you down.
I'm sorry you are experiencing this, it is truly pathetic when someone would sooner risk causing this terminal heartbreak, than suffer short term discomfort by communicating. It's pathetic.

OOP: Jesus fucking Christ. How do I pin a comment? That’s so unbelievably true I can’t even say anything.
Physically he’s pretty intimidating. He’s 6’6 and about 270 pounds, and he can be pretty scary to people who don’t know him. But he’s always been extremely sweet and kind, and that’s one of his biggest insecurities, looking like a man but not ‘feeling’ like one. Which has always been bullshit to me. But yeah, everything you said is literally him.
I can’t even thank you enough for writing this. Having it down fully on here is so incredibly validating.

OOP on her husband’s co-worker being a problem

OOP: She is A problem. Singular. I’m not running to her house to curb stomp her because I don’t know a damn thing about this woman. But regardless. Yeah, she wanted to fuck a married man, is that fucked up? Absolutely, and if the chance comes around I’m being petty and getting revenge. But seriously, who’s the hell is she? Did I spend 15 years of my life with this woman? Did I make vows to her? NO.
Read this, then reread it sir. My HUSBAND, is at fault here, because he knew damn well what was going on. He knew this woman wanted him, he knew what was going to happen and he let it. What can I do to her? Nothing, what can I do to my husband? Divorce him. That’s the bottom line.
For the love of god, stop dick riding my husband and move on, it’s actually insane that I have to say this but no one is defending that woman, no one, we’re coming rightfully for my husband because of HIS part in all of this.

 
Soon to be ex saw my update, came to my house. I’m safe. - May 9, 2024
I can’t post another update to the relationship sub, and I didn’t know if people would see it if I just made an edit myself on my other post. Some shit went down, but I’m okay. Yesterday night STBX contacted me. A lot of people told me to delete my recent update made of the post, it honestly slipped my mind that he could be reading it too,
He said that he was a bit hurt that I’d think he would go for Alimony. But that he understands given everything. He told me that he wasn’t going to but if he needed to sign something to prove it he would.
I said given everything that’s happened he can’t blame me for being on alert. He said that he’s quit his job and that he’s thinking about returning to Germany to be with his family there, additionally he says he’s cut contact with that coworker. He apologised again and wished me the best
Right, and that would have been just fine by itself. But I woke up at about 2.15am last night needing a wee and I saw my ring door bell going off. I have footage of him just sitting outside my house talking to himself. Literally he got there at 1 ish, knocked, sat down on my front steps and just started talking. I slept through it and only woke up because I needed the bathroom. I literally sat in my closet for ages just watching the camera not knowing what to do until he left at 3am.
He’s probably going to read this too but I’m somewhere safe, I just can’t tell you all for obvious reasons. He sent me a message saying he can’t lose me, that I’m the love of his life. I told him to fuck off and blocked him.
I really can’t say much, but I’m taking action. Absolutely don’t worry about that little prick.
Just a possible last update, it’s a bit risky to tell you what’s happening now that it’s gotten a bit shittier, just in case it gets back to him.
Relevant Comments
OOP on her husband blowing up his life for his emotional affair and doing anything to get her back

OOP: I did end up asking him why he declined her offer for a blow job. I feel like at this point it’s pretty done and dusted, there isn’t really a need to keep lying.
He said the main thing was that he was a little bit afraid to cross that line, and that he had rationalised to himself that since it hadn’t turned physical, it wasn’t bad. (He didn’t really elaborate on why he was afraid, but we were each other’s firsts, so that’s maybe why?)
I cringed a bit writing about her feeling up his muscles. It feels a bit gross to type out for some reason. My STBX is a physically big bloke. He’s 6’6 and roughly 270. He was in the military for a while and he never got out of that routine. I really don’t know what he means when he says his muscles. I mean it could be any of them.
My heart does really hurt for him in a strange way. I was a bit panicked this morning after I woke up from the nights drama worried if he had a night terror or something. I know that he betrayed me, but I still can’t stop hoping that he’s okay. I’ve messaged some of his friends to check up on him just in case.

OOP on if she and her husband have kids

OOP Nope! No kids thank god! We’re childfree

 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

Hi all, I am a SWE with 10 YOE. More background about me: Generally a low profile person. I get things done. I working very independently and bosses/stakeholders/teammates I work with like to work with me. I always share useful code and mentor the junior members.
Recently I joined a Global US bank that has been restructuring (you probably know which one). I was hired as a senior individual contributor based in Singapore. My entire team is based in US/Mexico. My boss is in US too. Based on the interviews and job description, I was hired to support the global technology function with close proximity to Singapore should the need to support Asia arises. I enjoyed working with my boss and my teammates are generally nice although I only see them for 3-4 hours every week due to timezone difference. I enjoyed solving difficult problems and I'm ok with the red tapes associated with getting those things approved since it's a bank.
In the past 6 months, here are the changes:

• Instead of 1 boss, now I have 3 bosses. Boss A was my original boss and he gives me my usual Book of Work. Boss B is my "actual" boss in the chain but he's just helping me with administrative stuff like leave approvals. Boss C is a MD based in Singapore. I dotted-line report to her as well.
• Pressure from Boss C. She didn't interview me. She was recently demoted down into her current role. During my first introduction with her, she spoke about a couple of heavy things that I am hearing for the first time.
  • She wants me to be the "guiding light" to help uplift the department that she is heading.
  • She wants to promote me even thought she has never met me.
  • She wants me to set up infrastructures in Singapore. She will support me in terms of sponsorship and using her seniority. For the rest, I'm on my own. (To clarify, we do have a lot of infrastructure set up for global usage. But she wants her department in Singapore to become a satellite for the region.
  • I have to attend the senior leadership meeting and share updates with no teammates backing. Boss A sits in US so he can't attend. I have to set up working group on my own to lead these new efforts.
• I work 50-55 hours per week due to the timezone difference. On 2-3 out of 5 weekdays, I work from 10am to 12 midnight. I don't eat dinner with my wife as often as before due to meetings. I have very low energy. Low libido.

I never asked for any of these. As I said, I'm a low key person and I hate being high profile. I'm happy being a senior IC. I have no aspirations to be promoted to senior management. I am struggling so hard internally because deep down, I know that I can do all of the above if I tried very very hard but I don't really want to. I want to give up and quit but I feel like a weakling for thinking of giving up.
I'm just hoping that someone here can knock some sense into me. To give me some advice on what I should do.