i keep hitting rock bottom. i didn’t do as well as i had hoped for wa2. i know that i last minute studied as always but during the entire wa week i slept after 1am on most days studying. and i failed amath again (17/40) despite amath being the only subject that i was actively working on improving (like i asked so many questions to my amath teacher, got tutored by a friend, my parents got me amath tuition…) and i hoped that my amath would at the very least be a B4 or C5 considering how much i’d tried to work on it.
admittedly i neglected integration and got most of the differentiation questions correct but it scared me that i still made so many careless mistakes that lost me precious marks, and i had also revised integration for like 1.5H on the night of the paper (and i had sjbo and social studies on the same day and slept at 3.45am studying) so i was crazy devastated when i got back my paper. i legit had a breakdown in class and my friend had to sit beside me to comfort me and i felt so rabak the entire day lmfao. and it was the second time crying cause i was crying over another subject last week 💀💀
then i got back physics yesterday. F9. i was kinda bummed mostly because everyone else in my class also said they didn’t study but they all passed (i think i got lowest in class for physics). while i didn’t learn the content at all and legit got the si units wrong it still bummed me out because it feels like everyone is just naturally smarter than i am because they didn’t study and still did well, while when i didn’t study i still failed. and damn badly at that. admittedly my calculations were all correct just the si units were wrong, and my explanations were also all wrong 💀💀
and then i was sick so i didn’t go to school and my friend ended up taking emath for me. she didn’t wanna tell me how much i got but i bugged her because i had accepted my fate alr (during the exam i spent wayy too much time on the first question and was left to rush through ~30 marks worth of questions in ~20 minutes) but i thought i was gonna get C6 at the worst. well no,,, F9. and well she told me to not cry and i promised her that but i did end up crying on call (just didn’t tell her that so she didn’t know that) while chatting with her. emath topics were matrices, probability and statistics. i was shaky with matrices (indication of my ass foundation ig cause everyone ik says it’s damn easy) and i spent 2 hours the night before working my misconceptions and doing practise questions until i got them all correct but for some reason on the day of the paper itself i just. didn’t perform. and the thing is that for wa1 i got an A1. and A1 to F9… what the fuck.
all my friends around me are good at math. i am fucking terrified to touch math because i can’t ’eat the frog’— i tell myself to tackle the hard things but the moment i get stuck on a math question or get lost after following a math lesson it’s like my brain shuts down. it goes, “fuck i can’t do this anymore” and i’m forced to watch myself become more and more of a failure because younger me couldn’t tackle the hard things and work on her maths.
i’ve been trying to move forward only and stop dwelling on the past, but it’s really hard to when you can’t help but want to fuck your younger self up and humble her and knock sense into her so that she actually took her acads seriously. my parents always had high expectations of me and i responded to them by self-sabotaging— i remember they installed a cctv in my room bc i refused to study, and i had several physical fights with my mother; i vaguely remember being dragged across the floor by my hair and her stopping the car and asking me to get out and me also fighting back at her, and my dad calling me hopeless and weak willed and at the time thinking why they were doing this to me.
but well i honestly miss those times. i wish that when my parents installed that cctv in my room that i woke up. i wish that when my dad threatened to call the police on me i woke up. i wish that when my dad called me weak-willed and kicked me out of the dining room when i was stuck on a math question in primary school and couldn’t answer his prompting questions because i was sleepy and expected him to just point-blank give me the answer i woke up and realised that my own behaviour was leading to my downfall. i wish that i didn’t get sick at the start of last year and missed out on valuable lessons to build a proper foundation in my subjects. i wish i was studying rn instead of having yet another breakdown for the nth time this year and ranting to reddit again. some neverending fucking cycle my entire profile’s pathetic
i wish i paid attention in class and didn’t have just a holier-than-thou, inflated ego. i wish i didn’t have this kind of awakening this late, months to my o’levels, with my grades basically confirming that dsa is hopeless for me. because of my fuckery, i didn’t study for sjbo and i don’t think i can get anything. because of my incompetence and my cold i haven’t started studying for sjcho. because of my stupidity i fucked up my entire educational career. honestly right dying rn and reincarnating as someone who can make her parents and herself proud would be perfect. i wish i wasn’t so scared of dying too 😂

Little intro: I'm a 1st February 2021 European Ape, 100 shares DRS'D. I opened my Reddit account only to be in this Community and I've never reached the Karma requirements to post, so I lurked for a long time, but now the lovely mods allowed me to post 🙏🏻 I'm honored to be officially an active member of Superstonk, I'm crazy in Love with all of you Regarded Apes! ❤️🌍🦍
I'm really smooth brained about financial markets, but I am a philosophical counselor and I have some understanding of human nature. I believe that SHF are trying to build a Narrative of blame on our Community through the articles about DFV. When shit will seriously hit the fan (even if I'm fucking jacked, my rational mind reminds me that it's still trading sideways), devastating consequences will manifest. The easiest scapegoats are DFV and Superstonk. I believe that the Twitter posts are genuine (you can see the Artist's peculiar touch in them), but the articles about the respawn of DFV are ultrasuspicious. Beware of the "don't dance" scene in The Big Short.
The division of the masses in polarized factions, easier to manipulate, is the political trick that Rome, my hometown, taught to the world: "Divide et Impera". Sun Tzu said: "If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat." If I understood correctly the megalomanian hybris mindset of the Wall Street sharks, the only way to damage control and deflect the attention of the public from the absolutely disgusting level of corruption that caused the financial catastrophe that will eventually lead to MOASS, is by fueling a "war among poors" (I don't know how to translate what in italian is called "guerra tra poveri"). I think what is happening on MSM is the plantation of seeds that will grow into weeds of blame of our beloved Community of individual investors.
I believe we are part of the biggest mechanism of redistrubition of wealth in human history. But we must be aware that the poor people will get angry at the "new rich" much more easily than towards the overlords that have made them poor for decades. I have no answers about this, I just want to share my reflections and see if I manage to get your feedbacks to further make up my mind. Stay hydrated, Zen and HOLD, my fellow Apes. Moon is waiting for us 🥋🔥🚀🌕

Hey all. Long post. Sorry.
I naturally have type 1 hair, but it’s looked a little poofy and frizzy since my mid teens. I live in a pretty humid climate (tropics), so that could be playing a part in the frizz, although I really doubt that because I’ve lived here my whole life and this is the only time my hair has gone rogue. We use clean filtered water so I don’t think that’s it, either. The two indisputable culprits are: the heat treatments which I’d been getting since my mid teens and which I’ve only stopped doing recently, and my diet. The treatments weren’t frequent- I got maybe 1-2 a year, also during this time I still went in for my regular trim, even grew my hair past the shoulders but the frizziness never went away. As for the diet, I had an ED when I was 14 (I’m in my late teens now) and ate less than 500 calories a day for a pretty long time- I’ve recovered, but I now eat considerably less than I used to. As irrational as this may sound I fear I somehow irreversibly fucked my vitamin levels up or hormones or whatever, and the fact that I eat really little these days I fear could be playing a part in my less than desirable hair health.
I’ve combed through my entire past (pun intended) and tried to find possible answers as to where it all went wrong. I’ve tried pretty much everything- oral supplements, at-home heat-free treatments, special formulas for “fixing” damaged hair. I no longer apply any artificial heat (flat iron, blow dryer, etc). I have a carefully curated haircare routine, no harsh or daily shampooing, I mostly just use a conditioner and natural oils. Silk pillow casings. Wooden anti-static hairbrushes. I usually let my hair dry in front of the fan without touching it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that bad- in some ways my hair looks better than it used to months ago when I still did heat treatments and flat ironing. But it has more frizz and flyaways than it used to, especially the topmost layers (the deeper bottom layers still have that old shine, thankfully). I just want my old hair back. If there’s anything I deeply regret, it’s my silly adolescent self giving in to the parlor stylists and letting them treat my hair without fully understanding the long-term consequences. And not appreciating my hair enough probably…I used to get a lot of compliments on it. Like, a REAL lot. Not anymore.
I got a bob cut and I’m just wondering- can I fix this by just growing it out and getting regular trims? Just be patient and let time and the human body do their magic? Or did I irreversibly damage my hair the moment I got my first treatment and should I just stop hoping I’ll ever get my “virgin” hair back? Should I go see a doctor and have my vitamins checked? Any advice? Any stories to cheer me up? I’m just so tired lmao

Hey all. I naturally have type 1 hair, but it’s looked a little poofy and frizzy since my mid teens. I live in a pretty humid climate (tropics), so that could be playing a part in the frizz, although I really doubt that because I’ve lived here my whole life and this is the only time my hair has gone rogue. We use clean filtered water so I don’t think that’s it, either. The two indisputable culprits are: the heat treatments which I’d been getting since my mid teens and which I’ve only stopped doing recently, and my diet. The treatments weren’t frequent- I got maybe 1-2 a year, also during this time I still went in for my regular trim, even grew my hair past the shoulders but the frizziness never went away. As for the diet, I had an ED when I was 14 (I’m in my late teens now) and ate less than 500 calories a day for a pretty long time- I’ve recovered, but I now eat considerably less than I used to. As irrational as this may sound I fear I somehow irreversibly fucked my vitamin levels up or hormones or whatever, and the fact that I eat really little these days I fear could be playing a part in my less than desirable hair health.
I’ve combed through my entire past (pun intended) and tried to find possible answers as to where it all went wrong. I’ve tried pretty much everything- oral supplements, at-home heat-free treatments, special formulas for “fixing” damaged hair. I no longer apply any artificial heat (flat iron, blow dryer, etc). I have a carefully curated haircare routine, no harsh or daily shampooing, I mostly just use a conditioner and natural oils. Silk pillow casings. Wooden anti-static hairbrushes. I usually let my hair dry in front of the fan without touching it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that bad- in some ways my hair looks better than it used to months ago when I still did heat treatments and flat ironing. But it has more frizz and flyaways than it used to, especially the topmost layers (the deeper bottom layers still have that old shine, thankfully). I just want my old hair back. If there’s anything I deeply regret, it’s my silly adolescent self giving in to the parlor stylists and letting them treat my hair without fully understanding the long-term consequences. And not appreciating my hair enough probably…I used to get a lot of compliments on it. Like, a REAL lot. Not anymore.
I got a bob cut and I’m just wondering- can I fix this by just growing it out and getting regular trims? Just be patient and let time and the human body do their magic? Or did I irreversibly damage my hair the moment I got my first treatment and should I just stop hoping I’ll ever get my “virgin” hair back? Should I go see a doctor and have my vitamins checked? Any advice? Any stories to cheer me up? I’m just so tired lmao

Welcome back to a little more MARRIED Mary Mania before I wrap things up with The Abridged Goblinization. I decided that this bit deserved its own chapter. Some of you seem to be entertained by Mary (or at least entertained by your own loathing of her), so I hope this will prove amusing. In my life, I've encountered an inordinate number of low-key lolcows (probably because I was far too patient and far too passive for far too long), so I might as well throw just enough distortion on the page to protect the good guys and the genuinely reformed beards. But I'm also gonna shine a bright, unflattering spotlight on the lolcows, creeps, weirdos, pervs, and BEARDS, both neck and leg.
And I'll very, very cautiously tiptoe over the bit where I do a bunch of mental gymnastics, squint my eyes, tilt my head, and convince myself that dating Whisky might be a welcome change of pace. I have no delusions when I look back on it. This was a dumb move in retrospect, but all the mental gymnastics in the world can't bring me to a reasonable scenario where I was psychic and thus able to predict what he'd become once he stopped pretending to be a gentleman. Nor can the most elite, Olympic-level mental gymnastics execute a double salto layout with a half-twist perfectly enough to force me to concede the "logical point" that I should have spotted warning signs that I'd never freakin' seen before. Okay, that's enough saltiness for today. Don't worry. This chapter mostly focuses on Mary's mania. Whisky's just kind of... there.
So there I was... dating a guy who called when he said he would, remained constant in his affections, never asked for weird stuff in the sack (in fact, we weren't even intimate at that point), and claimed to be a secular humanist who practiced elements of Hinduism (as opposed to conveniently becoming born-again whenever it suited his needs to wallow in shame). And we seemed to have similar enough tastes in media, which made for pleasant movie nights and enjoyable conversations about nerdy stuff. It felt like a step up. It felt safe. At that point in time, I was content.
But here's a shameful admission for ya. My original intention was to make Whisky the "for now guy." I knew I could do better. I was formally educated, I was in shape, I was normatively attractive, and I tended to be successful in both my theatrical and academic endeavors. Plus, I was super friendly and good with people. Whisky was kind of a bump on a log. Sure, he seemed nice. He was sometimes able to make interesting conversation. But my overall sentiment regarding the relationship was, to quote Whisky's favorite catch phrase, "Meh."
I knew he was mooching off his mysterious "big bro," and he wasn't doing this with the intention of saving up and eventually becoming self-sufficient. He just kicked up a fuss whenever he wanted something, and... it usually appeared. I still thought he was physically unattractive, too. I hate nasty-ass beards, I have a strong preference for shorter guys (they don't need to be as short as Dennis, but I don't exactly love being towered over), and Whisky had whatever the dude version of resting bitch face is. I admonished myself for being shallow and decided to soldier on. Date after date. And I did kind of get used to all the shallow things I objected to.
But, really... Dating Whisky at all was a dick move on my part. Then again, how many Nice Guy (TM)s want girls to do exactly what I did? Not attracted? Think he's kind of a bum? Find him a bit boring? Just give him a chance!!! Go on a crap-ton of dates with him until you like the familiarity enough to settle for him. That's the key to a healthy relationship!!! It never works. You could flip this around and apply it to Nice Girls who want pity dates, too.
Anyway. Lucy knew I was dating Whisky, and she thought it was great. She was honestly just happy to see that I was no longer pining over Dennis and that Whisky was no longer getting relentlessly stalked by Mary. Speaking of Mary... She'd had an imaginary dramatic breakup with Scumbanger not long after she crashed Lucy's brunch. Murky aside... The following summer, I'd do another show with the pervy pest and I'd find out that Mary had given the former Rum Tum Tugger a tug in the parking lot of The Imp and had let him motorboat her. When dozens of lewd messaged filled his inbox the following day, the most indiscriminate playboy I'd ever met in my freakin' life blocked that clingy legbeard's number and never had any further contact with her. But seeing as neither of them are especially reliable sources, my best guess is that the truth is somewhere in between.
After the dramatic "breakup" with Scumbanger, Mary immediately became obsessed with the new tech guy (and his wife). They allegedly had something of a throuple situation going on, but no one ever witnessed any hard evidence of this. And then Mary and Tech Guy's wife allegedly had a catfight in the middle of the fancy restaurant where the three spent their date nights. Mary did have a shiner and a scraped knee for a few weeks, and she intimated to me that Chuckie was actually the one responsible for her looking a little rough...
I believed her because there was something very different about her demeanor when she told me this. When she was in larger groups, she just screeched about how she thought the catfight was foreplay until Tech Guy ghosted her. Yet again, we'll never know the truth. But I err on the side of belief when someone tells me that DV is going on in their home, even if I generally regard that person as a delusional pathological liar. Plus, Mary had never badmouthed Chuckie before and she never made excuses for her philandering. She just felt entitled to any ding-dong she desired. Bottom line, I think there was an unfortunate incident, and I urged her to report it. She didn't; but that doesn't mean it didn't happen.
And, yes. I think we're allowed to show compassion for Mary if Chuckie did indeed do what she was accusing him of. She absolutely deserved to get dumped in a spectacular fashion. No one deserves violence, though. But I think we're also allowed to laugh at Mary when she's acting like a crank-crazed maniac.
Moving on to lighter topics! Mary claimed to be having a hot, steamy affair with the artistic director of The Imp. At first, this seemed outlandish. But he had been the one to hire her. And he repeatedly refused to replace her when she consistently failed to learned her lines, ran around naked, and contributed little more than mukbangs to the comedy (again, I personally found it funny when she did that, but I was in the minority).
Some skullduggery was definitely afoot. Was it "sexy time," as Mary enthusiastically claimed? Who knows. Chuckie might have been paying the dude to give Mary a hobby. But not long after Mary started boasting about boning the artistic director, he suddenly began calling her out on her unprofessional behavior. They "broke up," but Mary managed to avoid getting kicked out of the improv troupe, bragging that she could sue the director for sexual harassment if he fired her.
And then... there was the pièce de résistance of Mary's misadventures in mating. She met a biker dude at Filthy McNasty's. This guys was disgusting. Most of her previous dudes had been questionable, weird, or possibly imaginary. But we all saw this one. He was as fat as a Hutt, he smelled like a grease trap, motor oil, B.O., and a very specific type of cheese... The few teeth that he had were black and green, his fingernails were yellowed and a few of them oozed pus. Finally, the volume and crackly, bubbly properties of his frequent farts indicated to George Gay that he, "definitely had a virgin booty." Mary's lard-ass loverboy called himself "Hogg," which was probably a reference to the two-wheeled vehicle that he was very obviously too large to actually ride. Or it might have just been an obvious nickname for a filthy fat fuck.
But Hogg, like Tech Guy a few loverboys ago, had a wife. And she made frequent appearances at Filthy's as well. Hogg's wife was shockingly... kind of pretty. A little rough around the edges. Didn't smell the greatest. But she stood in stark contrast to her repugnant hubby, even with her fried hair, her sloppily inked tats, and her imprecisely applied eye makeup. Her teeth were free of obvious rot. She had a beautiful figure. And she had a carefree attitude that was probably attractive to a number of people. She'd fart right along with Hogg, she didn't shave her legs, and the profane compound nouns she came up with always cracked me up (lard-tard, smegma-booger, felch-belcher).
And Mary was once again claiming to be in a throuple with The Hoggs. But this time, there was hard evidence. They'd get busy in some corner of the establishment, and even got booted from the dive bar a few times for lewd behavior, offensive odors, and illegal drug use. On one particular night, Mrs. Hogg lit one of her hubby's gargantuan ass-rippers while Mary was doing her thing, completely shrouded by his big belly. The blue flame ignited some spilt booze on the dingy floor, and a small fire erupted. The staff were able to stomp it out, but the nasty throuple was unceremoniously banished.
Alas, management allowed Mary to re-enter the bar because she apparently had some sort of sway with one of the bartenders. Instead of meeting her...uh... "partners" for some more boom-boom, Mary decided to come back inside and gush about Hogg's majestic rooster to all of us. She smelled like D cheese, ammonia, and burnt farts as she plopped down at our table, already screeching about how much bigger her "new boo" was, compared to that vile turd of an artistic director.
George Gay: Fuck me, Mary!!! You reek. Go wash the uncircumcised methhead off your hands and then you can sit with us.
Mary started to protest. Lucy cut her off. "Your whole body is probably a veritable Petri dish from fooling around with those nasty-ass people." She handed Mary some Purell. "Was the junkie junk off, keep the bottle, and don't you fucking touch me when you come back!"
Mary's bottom lip began to quiver and she looked pleadingly at me. "Just wash up," I told her. "You're too pretty to go around smelling like that.”
Off she went to the dingy bathroom. Maybe I wasn't harsh enough, but flattery got results in this instance. And when she returned, she had managed to dilute the stench enough so that we could stand to sit at the same table with her.
Mary took a deep breath in preparation to gush about something that would have undoubtedly been disgusting, but George cut her off this time. "Mare. How do you even BANG someone with a belly like that?"
Mary (speaking a bit more quickly than usual): Oh, it just takes some creative positioning. We get him to lie down. If Mrs. Hogg is taking in the rod, I hold his bowl of jelly up with both arms and stick my cooter in his face. He eats it like his mommy made it! And when it's my turn to get blasted, the missus uses a bunch of yoga straps to hold it up. I have to take it from behind because my own little tiny bit of va-jiggle-jaggle bumps up against his bowl of jelly if why try to smash like vanilla people. It's so much fun, though!!! And then he props his bowl of jelly up on the coffee table and plays with himself while he watches his honey strap on a dil...
George: I so regret asking.
Mary: They're sooo fun to fool around with! I think they might be my forever partners! (Her hands were too shaky to slide down her body in unbridled ecstasy, so she clasped them together and hid them underneath her itty bitty little gunt.)
Lucy: So when are you gonna dump Chuck?
Mary: Well... Hogg and the missus don't have much scratch. And what they do have, they spend on smokeables. When I meet a real sugar daddy, I'll get rid of Chuckle. He pretended to be a baller before we got married. But he's just middle management and he's content to stay there. Pffffftt. No ambition.
Mary launched into another long, unnecessarily graphic gushing about her garbage partners and their nasty-ass boom-boom. So I decided this would be a good time to clear my conscience about dating Whisky. Mary hadn't so much as mentioned him in months. She was inexplicably smitten with The Hoggs. And her ultimate dream man was obviously some filthy rich dude (perhaps a literally filthy dude who was also rich), which took Whisky out of the running. I still think it would have been amusing if Mary had tried to date Mori...
I waited for her adult film star gasp to wind down before I finally interjected, "Wow. Sounds like you've got a fantastic sex life right now!"
Mary: I do! You need to get over that born-again weirdo and find a real man so that you and I can have good girl talk!
Me: Well... I'm not banging anybody, but I am dating somebody. Sort of. It's not really that big of a deal. I'm not even sure that I'm completely into him. But he's been super sweet to me...
Lucy put her arm around me, almost as if she knew I was about to need protection.
Mary: TELL ME!
I hesitated. "Well... It's Whiskers."
In an instant, George jumped up and grabbed Mary by the shoulders, lest she lunge at me.
But Mary got very quiet. Silent tears welled up in her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. She gasped and buried her face in her hands, now emitting one seemingly endless, impossibly high-pitched whine.
George loosened his grip and began to pat her on the back. Lucy's grip tightened on me and she whispered, "Here we go. Overreaction sequence has commenced."
Mary lifted her red, tear-stained face and glared at me. "HOW COULD YOU???"
Me: Mary, I swear. I thought you hated his guts. I haven't heard you talk about him in ages. When he asked, I thought it would be good for me to give him a chance since he's always been really sweet to me.
Mary: But what about the way he treated ME??? He was such an asshole!
Lucy: Was he? Mary, you stalked the guy. If he was rude, it was only because you weren't taking NO for an answer.
Mary: He never told me he wanted to end things. He just kept ghosting me. But whenever I showed up at his house and jumped on him, we always wound up smashing. Eventually.
I didn't have the gumption at that point in my life to suggest to Mary that it's wrong on every imaginable level to coerce someone into intimate activity, regardless of gender. And even knowing what Whiskers would eventually become, he didn't deserve THAT. I should have called her out. Instead I tried to steer the conversation back to her current bedroom bliss and try to get her to resume thinking the disgusting thoughts that delighted her so much.
Me: Who cares what he's doing now?! Aren't you insanely happy with your fun new lovers???
Mary: NO! THEY STINK! HE'S FAT. I want my sexy Whisky-Boo Whiskers back!!! Give him back, Valley! Puh-leeee-eeee-eeeee-eeeease.
Me: I don't "have" him. I'm just seeing him. If he hurt you this much, why don't you try to sit down and have a real conversation with him? It might be good for both of you to clear the air.
Mary: He blocked me on everythi-iiiiiii-iiiii-iiiiiing. Waaaaaaaaaah!
Me: Well, I guess that's your answer. You probably overwhelmed him. He seems like a bit of a softy. Personally, I need a softy right now. But I think you need a manly man.
Mary rose. She gave me an icy stare. And then she cooed in an unnervingly sweet tone. "I love you, Valley-Boo. I know you didn't mean to break my heart."
Me: Thank you, Mary. Really, I wouldn't have even considered his initial invitation if you hadn't been calling him "Satan," and telling us all that you hated him, and dating all these new guys. I didn't do it to spite you, I swear. It just happened.
Mary (still creepily, icily sweet): Yes. We're so alike, you and I. It's perfectly understandable that the same guy would go for both of us. But you owe me. You owe me big.
Me: I'm gonna disagree with that. If you think I slighted you, just tell me to fuck off. If you really do understand that these things happen, then you'll accept that there was no malice on anyone's part.
Mary: Mmmm-hmmmm. We'll see about that.
She jiggled her Jupiters, tossed her hair, and stalked out of the dive bar...

AND THEN SHE BANGED DENNIS.

I (F44) have the sweetest little man (11) who is having a lot of trouble with anxiety. He’s always been sensitive, incredibly caring, empathetic, and very smart. He makes friends easily and does well in school. His teachers have never had any issues with him and have been surprised whenever I’ve asked if he is ok at school.
When I pick him up he breaks down in tears, almost every day. He gets so upset I usually have to pull over to hug him while he bawls. It’s usually because something unexpected happened, like having a substitute teacher, he didn’t score over 27/30 in a maths quiz, something else unusual happened. Sometimes he can’t give a reason. There’s no issues with bullying, he is very popular.
I know I’m his safe space and I have no issue at all with supporting him at these times. It concerns me though that he’s holding himself together all day, and that he often says he’s anxious and depressed.
The latest development is heightened claustrophobia. He’s always had it but it seems to be getting worse. Today he couldn’t go in the education van that visits the school, which really upset him. We’ve got flights booked for the end of the year and he’s starting to worry about that.
He’s had quite a few therapy answers OT sessions and he hates them. He says they don’t help, and being told to have a different mind set or use tools to manage anxiety is not useful.
Do I just keep sending him, hoping that it will help long term? Should I seek testing? His step mum and my SO think he has ADHD, but his teachers don’t see any indication and I only see some elements. He can’t sit still, has meltdowns, talks very quickly etc. Online testing says ‘maybe’. The therapist he was seeing thinks maybe ASD, maybe not. Testing is over $2k for each area, so if it’s not ADHD then it will be another $2k to test for ASD etc. I’m willing to pay this, but I’d appreciate any input / other peoples experiences.
His diet is ok, he doesn’t eat meat except seafood so getting protein in is a challenge. His activity level is ok, could be better. He has 1-2 hours of screens a day, for 5 days of the week. I’m working hard to improve all these aspects, but I need to do better.

Are you up for a one-night stand? Or maybe you keep dreaming about one and even know who you’d like to go with? You might be wondering if it’s really worth it, or maybe you just can’t get over your last adventure partner(s). It’s really different to be only looking for one-time sex. Or are we sometimes really looking for intimacy in a one-night stand?
A psychologist I spoke with states that the answers to these questions are individual, and whether it is worth having a one-night stand is only a matter of the person’s own decision, and the most important thing here is that it takes place with mutual consent and safely. We examined what can be hidden behind the desire for a one-night adventure and what you should be prepared for if you don’t want that adventure to later turn into the agony of unrequited love.
WHAT DO YOU THINK PEOPLE ARE LOOKING FOR IN A ONE NIGHT STAND? WHAT NEEDS CAN IT MEET?🔥
Man is a highly social being, living and interacting in social communities of various levels. We all seem to have an innate desire to create interpersonal relationships, be it friendships, romances, work relationships, or perhaps no-strings-attached relationships. Why innate? Because relationships are one of the basic human needs, the lack of which leads to a strange feeling of discomfort or emptiness. The more we lack a relationship, the more we think about it and seek to satisfy this need. Even when it seems like there is no room or time for intimacy in our lives, our bodies still crave closeness. The most common reason for one-night stands is precisely the lack of and desire for this closeness.
WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO CONSIDER BEFORE ENTERING INTO SUCH A RELATIONSHIP?🔥
Before getting into such a relationship, it is important to think about what need we will satisfy in this relationship and what we really want. Will it be only physical closeness related to the act of sex itself, or do we still expect more intimacy and warmth? It is also important to assess whether such relationships conflict with our beliefs and values.
If we are convinced that sex should only be a choice for two people who love each other, stepping into such a relationship will definitely cause us discomfort.
One night stands can cause internal conflict, and sometimes even a feeling of alienation. So security is another aspect that should be paid attention to. And here we are not only talking about safe sex, which is highly encouraged, but also about whether you will feel safe with that person, whether the environment will give you confidence, whether you will be able to relax and really give yourself at that time, so that you can feel pleasure.
WHAT WOULD YOU DISCUSS WITH A POTENTIAL ADVENTURE PARTNER(S)?🔥
All the things that are important to you before a one-night stand are likely to be important to your partner(s). Some maybe less, others more. There’s nothing wrong with asking each other: are we really doing all of this with no strings attached? Do you also think that we’re meeting only to satisfy the needs of our body? As in all life situations, it is important to talk and hear each other out. The details in experiencing this adventure are also important because they ensure safety and the enjoyment that awaits.
Ask each other where you would like to meet, what kind of environment would suit you both, what kind of pleasure or action you expect from each other.
Of course, spontaneity is also one of the most fascinating and appealing parts of a one-night stand, so you can leave as much room for the unknown as you’re comfortable with.
WHAT DO YOU DO IF YOU FIND YOURSELF EMOTIONALLY ATTACHED TO YOUR PARTNER(S)?🔥
Humans in general are not only social, but also very attached creatures, so it is normal that we get attached even to those partners who may be just an adventure for us. We le... Full article you found ⬇️⬇️⬇️ https://lovesiq.com/one-night-stand-some-things-to-know-about-it/

Hi guys, I'm a uni student who is redoing my Honours dissertation due to some complications - the uni was gracious enough to let me redo, but they've only given me a month (for context, this is usually a 6-month commitment!) and I REALLY need participants.
These are the deets:

• The research is on workplace conflict: basically, when you have conflict with your coworkers, does the way your boss react to it affect your stress levels differently? This is what I am looking to understand in an Indian diaspora.
• The criteria is if you are Indian, above 18 years old, and reporting to any superior at a full-time job
• It takes a little less than 5 minutes to complete
• NO PERSONAL IDENTIFIERS WILL BE ASKED OR RECORDED, INCL YOUR EMAILS ETC. (and it's a free survey of course. I just want to know about your conflict experiences at work.)
• To make it easier for you, you could imagine a situation where you or your co-workers had workplace conflict, and rate your answers to the questions according to that scenario.
• This is the link to participate: https://forms.gle/dN2vhonHRoymzBoc9

If you decide to, thank you so much for contributing to research on the Indian workforce and to my grades :")
TLDR: Uni student in dire need of responses from working professionals (who report to a boss) for his thesis. Pls fill up 5-min survey to participate!
P.S. I hope this is not going against any community guidelines... If yes then I'll take it down asap, please redirect me to a relevant subreddit! Thanks y'all >~<

Hello!
I hope we're all doing well!
7/12 correct last time around which was a lot better than i expected, but most importantly, our secondary parlay landed! (Secondary Parlay: Aldrich/Hardy o1.5/2.5 or R3 Start + McKinney/Ribovics ITD + Woodson/Caceres o1.5/2.5 or R3 Starts + Lewis/Nascimento ITD)
Full detailed breakdown here: https://www.reddit.com/MMAbetting/comments/1csfr9o/ufc_fight_night_barboza_v_murphy_fight_predictions/?
Lets hope for another successful event! Tough one though.
(c) - Champ
D/DWCS - Debut/Dana Whites' Contender Series
FLS - Fight Lose Streak
FWS - Fight Win Streak
NS - No Streak
(#x) - Rank in Division
x/3 - Confidence Levels
Lets go!!!
Prelims
Women’s Strawweight
Emily Ducote (-275) (13-8-0, NS) v Vanessa Demopoulos (+220) (10-5-0, NS)
Striking: Ducote throws a lot of volume when she fights, she’s fairly tenacious and is great at stringing together combinations. Demopoulos isn’t too much of a striker, she’s more of a collision waiting to happen, usually throwing heavy then going for takedowns. Because of that, I do think Ducote will be able to easily read those initial attacks coming and retaliate accordingly. Ducote has the mild advantage here.
Wrestling/Grappling: Demopoulos’ main style is grappling, she’s quick to set up submissions off her back, she’s got great flexibility and I think it’ll be dangerous for Ducote to even try to grapple with her. Demopoulos is the more effective grappler here in my opinion, at least in terms of submission aggression.
Cardio: Both are decent but Ducote seems to have the better cardio, especially since she looks relatively okay as the rounds go by, even after throwing a lot of volume.
Prediction: Ducote via UD (1/3)
Bantamweight
Alatengheili (+150) (16-9-2, NS) v Kleydson Rodrigues (-185) (8-3-0, NS)
Striking: A tale of two styles, Alatengheili throws heavy, explosive attacks but usually only when he counters, and he tends to try to lure in his opponents to explode once they make their attack. Rodrigues seems to be more calculated and more diverse with his boxing, often countering and making the right reads and the right attacks to land cleanly against aggressive opponents. Rodrigues is also most likely going to add a lot of kicks in this fight, as that has been quite effective when Gutierrez fought Alatengheili. Both have their own little advantages here, but I like how clean Rodrigues has been, compared to the heavy inaccuracy of Alatengheili, which has been highlighted in the main write up.
Wrestling/Grappling: I mean, Alatengheili is a very good wrestler, but he doesn’t really use it as much as he should. He has the advantage here on paper, but I just don’t know if he is going to be using it in this fight. If he does, then he could absolutely get a win here.
Cardio: It’s a bit hard to say, I kind of want to say Alatengheili has the better cardio here given his style, but it’s just so hard to tell. Make your own judgement on this one perhaps, but it could be a 50/50.
Prediction: Rodrigues via UD (1/3)
Women’s Strawweight
Piera Rodriguez (-175) (9-1-0, NS) v Ariane Carnelossi (+145) (14-3-0, NS)
Striking: Rodriguez has clean strikes in her arsenal and she does string together combinations well, her long jab is awesome and she uses it over and over again, which could then help lead to a takedown. But overall, she seems a lot more educated with her striking than Carnelossi. Carnelossi just has power and a bully kind of style, nothing really clean about her striking at all. Perhaps a tale of two different styles here.
Wrestling/Grappling: It has been clear since the moment I saw this fight was announced, that Rodriguez is going to employ her wrestling against Carnelossi, I don’t think Carnelossi is any good on the ground, and Rodriguez has been shown to time her entries very well. Rodriguez is clearly better in the wrestling department in my opinion.
Cardio: Eh, I’d say Rodriguez has the better cardio here, she’s a lot more experienced in the UFC than Carnelossi so we have seen her in those long, drawn out fights.
Prediction: Rodriguez via UD (1/3)
Middleweight
Abus Magomedov (-250) (25-6-1, 2 FLS) v Warlley Alves (+205) (14-7-0, 3 FLS)
Striking: Whilst Alves is well known for his ridiculous punching power and explosive attacks, I do think the reach advantage of Magomedov stifles a lot of that, as well as gives Magomedov the additional advantage of being able to see things come his way, considering that he fights decently well at range, whereas Alves needs to enter the pocket to land his attacks.
Wrestling/Grappling: This is where Alves should take the fight to win, it’s perhaps the path of least resistance and Alves does have quite a few submission wins under his belt, plus the wrestling could exhaust Magomedov, who has a questionable gas tank (which has hopefully been improved upon).
Cardio: I don’t trust Magomedov’s cardio here, I think he’s still a 1.5 round fighter, so the advantage here in my honest opinion falls to Alves here. This is going to be an interesting aspect of the fight though, because if Magomedov has fixed all of his cardio and pacing problems, he could very well be a dangerous man.
Prediction: Magomedov via KO R2 (1/3)
Women’s Bantamweight
Tamires Vidal (+300) (7-2-0, NS) v Melissa Gatto (-410) (8-2-2, 2 FLS)
Striking: Vidal has a bit of a power and explosiveness advantage here, especially very early on, but Gatto is a bit more well versed and a bit more cleaner when it comes to striking.
Wrestling/Grappling: This is a clear advantage to Gatto, she is very, very good on the ground and if she can completely lock down the movement of Vidal, it could be a long, drawn out fight but ultimately a victory for Gatto.
Cardio: it’s been quite a while since we’ve seen Gatto fight, but we do know that she’s been in decision bouts before, so her cardio isn’t exactly a big issue, whereas Vidal has that style where she needs to get a quick finish or she is going to slow down substantially. Gatto should have the slightly better cardio here, but that time away could prove otherwise.
Prediction: Gatto via UD (1/3)
Light Heavyweight
Oumar Sy (D) (9-0-0, 9 FWS) v Tuco Tokkos (D) (10-3-0, 3 FWS)
Striking: I frankly have no clue who the better striker is here, Sy has a longer reach and that could assist in his striking, but it’s a double debut, I won’t actually know until the fight happens.
Wrestling/Grappling: What I am confident in when it comes to wrestling is the fact that Sy is going to look for takedowns, that’s his bread and butter, he loves getting those takedowns, locking in a body lock or a getting his hooks in, and raining down blows from above, he is vicious once he is able to maintain a ground and pound position.
Cardio: Tokkos is coming in on short notice, so he probably doesn’t have the gas tank for a full blown fight, so expect him to come out swinging in the first round, but after that, it should mostly be Sy being the fresher fighter, considering he’s done all the cardio and conditioning training.
Prediction: Sy via KO R1 (2/3)
Lightweight
Tom Nolan (-450) (6-1-0, NS) v Victor Martinez (+340) (13-5-0, NS)
Striking: The main attraction for Nolan is his striking, he is a dangerous boxer who has a sneaky strong left hand, and Martinez tends to leave that side exposed when he retreats or circles away, which makes Nolan and his reach advantage a bit of a dangerous combination. Martinez is great on the feet too, but he’s been hurt before and is a bit susceptible to follow up shots, something Nolan does well also.
Wrestling/Grappling: I think Nolan is well rounded enough to have the edge in wrestling here, but I only say that before I haven’t seen Martinez grapple yet… so Nolan probably has the advantage here.
Cardio: Tough one to tell… I’m gonna keep it safe and say its possible even, but since both fighters are finishers, I don’t know if it matters too much.
Prediction: Nolan via KO R1 (2/3)
Main Card
Women’s Strawweight
Angela Hill (#12) (-160) (16-13-0, NS) v Luana Pinheiro (#13) (+130) (11-2-0, NS)
Striking: Hill is overall the better and more competent striker, as well as the more pace effective one, whereas Pinheiro is only known for that R1 KO power kind of striking style, so I do think Hill has the advantage here, plus, her Muay Thai is fun to watch so keep an eye on those fun clinch strikes!
Wrestling/Grappling: This is Pinheiro’s only way to win, she’s a very good grappler with awesome throws in her arsenal, but we have been seeing Hill do well at avoiding a lot of the throws that her opponents attempt, her whizzer is fairly good and her instincts to get back to the feet are great. Advantage still falls to Pinheiro here, but Hill shouldn’t be underestimated with her grappling and wrestling.
Cardio: Given that Hill has been in 5 round fights before, and that she rarely fades even after a 3 round war, I think she has the better cardio here, and I mean, we just saw Pinheiro absolutely gas out when she fought Ribas, so there’s that.
Prediction: Hill via UD (1/3)
Bantamweight
Adrian Yanez (-350) (16-5-0, 2 FLS) v Vinicius Salvador (+275) (14-6-0, 2 FLS)
Striking: Yanez has the cleaner boxing, he is awesome at angling away and firing away outside of his opponents effective cone of attack. He could perhaps be in trouble if he gets too reckless and starts hanging around in the pocket too much, but if he’s sticking and moving, he has the advantage here… so, I suppose the advantage is circumstantial but Yanez should be the more effective striker.
Wrestling/Grappling: I mean, since Yanez doesn’t grapple, I’d be inclined to think that Salvador has the better wrestling here, but it kind of feels like a slightly irrelevant thing to talk about. Both fighters are mostly strikers so… this particular category doesn’t matter that much.
Cardio: Again, a tough one to figure out since both fighters are finishers somewhat. I do think Yanez has the ability to do well in all three rounds, but that’s about it.
Prediction: Yanez via KO R2 (1/3)
Welterweight
Ramiz Brahimaj (+170) (10-4-0, NS) v Themba Gorimbo (-205) (12-4-0, 2 FWS)
Striking: This is all Gorimbo here, since Brahimaj both has a massive reach disadvantage, and really is just a good grappler. Gorimbo is also coming off a KO win so that feeling of knocking someone out could be a feeling he might chase this weekend.
Wrestling/Grappling: I’m inclined to say it’s pretty even here, but there is concern on my end surrounding the injury of Brahimaj… is he able to wrestle and grapple as effectively as he could prior to the spinal injury? That will most likely be answered this weekend. Gorimbo is a great wrestler though, he’s solid on the ground and could effectively shut down any submission attacks Brahimaj tries to set up.
Cardio: Two years away, nursing an injury like what Brahimaj has been doing could hamper his cardio in some way. That’ll also be answered this weekend so at the moment, I suppose Gorimbo has better cardio, but still i’m not too confident in saying that.
Prediction: Gorimbo via KO R1 (2/3)
Co-Main Event
Welterweight
Khaos Williams (-125) (14-3-0, NS) v Carlston Harris (+105) (19-5-0, 2 FWS)
Striking: This is all Williams, he is an incredibly powerful striker who is so explosive… I do think he has the possibility of properly testing Harris’ chin this weekend, so keep an eye out on KO props for him.
Wrestling/Grappling: On the other end of this fight, you have Harris who has a grappling advantage and honestly needs to use his grappling in this fight or he’s probably going to eat devastating punches.
Cardio: It kind of depends on who executes their gameplan better… If Williams lands heavy punches and wears down Harris, Harris’s cardio could be seriously sapped. Same as if Harris grapples and removes the explosive output of Williams, it would only drain Williams’ cardio.
Prediction: Harris via Sub R2 (1/3)
Main Event
Featherweight
Edson Barboza (#14) (+125) (24-11-0, 2 FWS) v Lerone Murphy (-150) (13-0-1, 5 FWS FWS)
Striking: This is going to be a fantastic striking fight, first and foremost. You have the power and pure kickboxing technique of Barboza versus the brilliant boxing and fluidity of Murphy. I don’t think there’s a major advantage in this fight either way, we don’t quite know where the ceiling is for Murphy, but we do know that Barboza is one of the best strikers in the division.
Wrestling/Grappling: Whilst both fighters are mainly strikers, both fighters are also extremely good on the ground, with perhaps Barboza having a slight edge given his experience in MMA compared to Murphy who has only recently added some strong wrestling into his skill set.
Cardio: I know that age is a factor here, but I believe Barboza going 5 rounds against Yusuff is proof that he has good enough cardio to push a serious and consistent pace into the championship rounds. We don’t know if Murphy can do that just yet, i guess we’ll find out in this phenomenal main event!
Prediction: Barboza via UD (1/3)
Primary Parlay: Ducote/Demopoulos o2.5 or GTD + (optional Gatto/Vidal o2.5 or GTD) + Nolan/Martinez ITD + Hill/Pinheiro o2.5 or GTD + Barboza/Murphy R3 Starts
Locks of the week: Optional Sy + Nolan + Gorimbo
Alt Bets: Alves KO R1, Pinheiro Sub R2 or 3, Williams KO R1, Murphy KO R1 2 or 3 (combo rounds)
And that's it!
Prediction accuracy as of 2024: 64.6%
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Lets have a fun and friendly discussion down below about this weekends card!
I hope you all have an amazing day, look after yourselves, and enjoy this awesome event!

Hi guys, I'm a uni student who is redoing her Honours dissertation due to some complications - the uni was gracious enough to let me redo, but they've only given me a month (for context, this is usually a 6-month commitment!) and I REALLY need participants. These are the deets:

• The research is on workplace conflict, for my university thesis: basically, when you have conflict with your coworkers, does the way your boss react to it affect your stress levels differently? This is what I am looking to understand in an Indian
• The criteria is if you are Indian, above 18 years old, and reporting to any superior at a full-time job
• It takes a little less than 5 minutes to complete
• NO PERSONAL IDENTIFIERS WILL BE ASKED OR RECORDED, INCL YOUR EMAILS ETC. (and it's a free survey of course. I just want to know about your conflict experiences at work.)
• To make it easier for you, you could imagine a situation where you or your co-workers had workplace conflict, and rate your answers to the questions according to that scenario.
• This is the link to participate: https://forms.gle/dN2vhonHRoymzBoc9

If you decide to, thank you so much for contributing to research on the Indian workforce and to my grades :") TLDR: Uni student in dire need of responses from working professionals (who report to a boss) for his thesis. Pls fill up 5-min survey to participate! P.S. I hope this is not going against any community guidelines... If yes then I'll take it down asap, please redirect me to a relevant subreddit! Thanks y'all >~<

There is CKD in my family. For some reason the doctors won't test me and just keep ignoring me on this..
Do you know how common excess magnesium is from supplementation and if kidney problems are more likely?
Other than this, nothing seems to be wrong with the function based on basic "kidney function" tests..
I was taking magnesium but not high, so why would it be high? I tend to be deficient in most things which I am seeking answers on too.
I was taking about 400mg daily at first then for a long time was only taking 200 or 100 every day or second day then had a gap of months before my blood test. That's only 118% then 59% then 39% of the RDA.
And regardless, how would I take or maintain a vitamin D absorption combo if I obviously need or should stop the supplementary magnesium? So I guess it really really isn't meant to happen with supplements..?
The levels are not sky high but are high so I'll be keeping an eye on it. But it seems even a multivitamin could cause this if I take one.

Hey there! I just started my first realm a few weeks ago. Currently there’s 3 of us, but I’d love to expand the community. 18+, every experience level welcomed. Would love having players that can all learn from each other. Not much established yet, aside from some basic rules, and a few farms, so open to ideas.
Rules: no stealing, no griefing, PvP with consent
If this sounds like a match for you, please comment below or send me a message. Happy to answer any questions, and look forward to meeting y’all !!

Yahoooo! Welcome to the Daily Discussion Thread! Have a very cool day! Luigi numbah one!
Welcome to the Daily Discussion Thread. This is the place for asking noob questions, venting about netplay falcos, shitposting, self-promotion, and everything else that doesn't belong on the front page.

New Players:

If you're completely new to Melee and just looking to get started, welcome! We recommend you go to https://blippi.gg/ and follow the links there based on what you're trying to set up. Additionally, here are a few answers to common questions:
Can I play Melee online?
Yes! Slippi is a branch of the Dolphin emulator that will allow you to play online, either with your friends or with matchmaking. Go to https://slippi.gg to get it.
Netplay is hard! Is there a place for me to find new players?
Yes. Melee Newbie Netplay is a discord server specifically for new players. It also has tournaments based on how long you've been playing, free coaching, and other stuff. If you're a bit more experienced but still want a discord server for players around your level, we recommend the Melee Online discord.
How can I set up Unclepunch's Training Mode?
First download it here. Then extract everything in the folder and follow the instructions in the README file. You'll need to bring a valid Melee ISO (NTSC 1.02)
I'm having issues with Slippi!
Go to the The Slippi Discord to get help troubleshooting.
How does one learn Melee?
There are tons of resources out there, so it can be overwhelming to start. First check out the SSBM Tutorials youtube channel. Then go to the Melee Library and search for whatever you're interested in.
But how do I get GOOD at Melee?
Check out Llod's Guide to Improvement
Where can I get a nice custom controller?
https://customg.cc/vendors
I have another question that's not answered here...
Check out our FAQs or post below and find help that way.

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• Current DDT Dynamic Link — Previous DDTs

As our web3 interactions and experiences grow, the exchange of data with dApps also grows. In an era where data privacy is more of a theory than practice, protocols that adopt a privacy-first approach through privacy-preserving techniques ensure that data sovereignty and data integrity of users are maintained in the web3 space.
In a decentralized setting, where transparency is a core tenet, this is not very easy to achieve. That's why the Oasis solution to the blockchain privacy paradox can answer so many web3 use cases. In the case of DID or decentralized identity, integrating smart privacy solutions can be a revolutionary approach. Recently Oasis engaged in insightful discussion with Fractal ID and Reclaim on how to effectively build the future of DID.

Oasis and Fractal ID

Fractal ID, along with idOS ( the identity layer of web3), is building the next-gen DID solution that will impact the web3 ecosystem, not limited by native chains but having cross-chain applicability. This means data ownership and privacy with interoperability and this is where the Oasis expertise can be so invaluable. The Oasis Privacy Layer or OPL is a flagship solution that helps integrate privacy to new and existing dApps on any EVM chains (its applicability is also evident in cross-ecosystem partnerships like Oraichain of Cosmos). So, if we can have a cross-chain DID solution that ensures user data privacy while interacting with the web3 space, it would mean the future of web3 experience is at hand.
For a detailed understanding of how Fractal works and how Oasis has the scope to impact its DID solutions, check out the Twitter (X) space conversation.

Oasis and Reclaim

We all know how "https" embodies the security of the internet. But it is web2. So how so we bridge it to web3 to ensure data integrity and privacy are at their highest level? Reclaim envisions enhanced https security by using ZKP. The role of Oasis here can be complementary as TEEs and ZKP are known to work well in tandem producing robust privacy solutions using the best of both worlds. This could unlock a new future for users regarding DID-enabled onboarding, loyalty programs, KYC and on-chain attestations, and even proving that users are humans.
For a detailed understanding of how Reclaim works and how Oasis has the scope to impact its DID solutions, check out the Twitter (X) space conversation.
What other dApps and use cases do you think can benefit from using the Oasis brand of confidentiality and therefore usher the next generation of web3 interactions and experiences? Let's discuss this in the comments.

Welcome to the Reverse: 1999 Daily Questions Megathread!

Please use this thread to ask any general inquiries about Reverse: 1999. Also, kindly search keywords under this thread as your questions may have already been answered by other Timekeepers.
Community Guides

• General Community Guide (tierlists, teambuilding, puzzle solutions, etc.)
• Income/Saving Guide
• Prydwen (tierlists, guides, character info, etc.)

Cheat Sheets

• 6-star Psychubes
• 5-star Psychubes
• Investment Priority
• Farming Stages
• Resonance Builds, Resonance Costs
• Material Crafting Requirements

Tools

• Planner & Summon Tracker

Wiki Pages

• Reverse: 1999 EN Wiki
• GameKee CN Wiki
• HuiJi CN Wiki
• bilibili CN Wiki

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ):
Q1. Should I re-roll?

• This depends on how much time you have to dedicate to re-rolling. In general, all three of the beginner banner characters are great, and you have options of doing shortelonger re-rolls, as per this guide.

Q2. Why is my answer incorrect in for the trail puzzle?

• Try to answer with proper letter casing - the answers are case-sensitive.

Q3. When is the daily reset?

• The game resets at 10:00 UTC, please refer to this timer.

Q4. Does pity transfer over to the next banner?

• Yes, pity should transfer over to the next banner of the same type.

Q5. How should I build my team?

• In general, teams consist of a single damage dealer that get supported by support-type characters, but there are many variations. We encourage you to take a look at some of the guides above!

Q6. Can I re-watch the cut-scenes/story?

• From the main screen/lobby, refer to the left icon below the Bank, go to Atlas, then go to the Story Review. This does not currently apply for event stories, unfortunately.

Q7. Are multiple copies of a certain character necessary?

• This will depend on a character-by-character basis. In general, however, there should not be a large importance on getting duplicate copies of a character.

Q8. When should I stop leveling characters?

• Please refer to the investment guide listed above.

Q9. What should I purchase in the Psychube Shop (Thought Elements/Thoughts in Eternity)?

• Do not buy the 5-star psychubes, as we will eventually get enough 6-stars.
• Prioritization order:

1. LF Polarization
2. Englighten I
3. Enlighten II

Q10. What should I prioritize in the Oneric Shop (Oneric Fluid)?

• Prioritization order:

1. Monthy Brief Cacophony
2. Crystal Casket
3. Permanent Brief Cacophony (or Moment of Dissonance to craft Brief Cacophony if needed)
4. Sonorous Knell

Misc Questions
M1. Are macros and auto-clickers allowed?

• No. They are against the game's terms of service; any usage will risk the potential of being banned.

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“Ready to make history, baby?”
I looked over toward Sheila as she stood on the gangplank leading up to The Burger. I still couldn’t believe she named our research ship ‘The Burger’... emotional relevance be damned.
“It's not exactly history,” I corrected.
“Oh come on! If your survey is right, this trench might run even deeper than the Challenger Deep, and you’re gonna be the first person to explore it! How is that not exciting?”
“Might be deeper, we only have a limited amount of topological data. And even if it is deeper, we’re talking only a few hundred feet at most, it’s really not that im-”
Sheila silenced me with a kiss.
“Nerd.” She teased, and I found myself too flustered to reply. After five years of marriage, she still could leave me speechless with just a kiss. God… how did someone like me end up with a woman like that?
Then again, how did someone like me end up where I was in general? It was honestly a little overwhelming. Standing on the dock, getting ready to board that ship and join the ranks of Jacques Piccard and James Cameron (yes, that James Cameron) as one of the few people to take a manned submersible down to the deepest parts of the ocean. And I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little scared too. Diving down that deep could easily be a one way trip if even the slightest thing went wrong. My submarine would be experiencing between 600 to 1100 atmospheres of pressure and while we’d tested it over and over again to make sure it would actually be up for the challenge, there was still a lingering iota of doubt in the back of my mind. All that needed to go wrong was one little thing, and that would be it for me.
The scariest part is that I probably wouldn’t even know what had happened… I’d simply be gone… and Sheila would be alone. The thought of that caused a momentary spike of panic in my chest that almost made me want to call this whole thing off.
Almost.
But, then I felt her hand close around mine. I looked up into her bright blue eyes, and saw her gentle smile.
“You’re gonna be okay, hun,” She promised. “You and your team have been running the numbers, right? It’s gonna go just fine!”
I nodded slowly.
“It’s gonna go fine…” I repeated, before she leaned in to kiss me, and gently pulled me by the wrist up onto the deck of the Burger.
She was probably right.
It probably would be fine.
Probably…
The trench I’d be exploring was a fairly recent discovery, located south of Greenland, in a vast stretch of water situated directly between Newfoundland and Iceland. It’d been uncovered during a topological survey in the area, and my team had taken an interest in investigating it further. At minimum, it was believed to descend to about 35,000 feet deep (over 10,000 meters), although the current theory was that it might have run even deeper. Determining the exact depth of the yet unnamed chasm was just one of the intents of our dive. The rest was studying the organisms that might be found down there, and how they might have differed from the ones found in other deep ocean trenches (some variation being expected given the isolated environment they were developing in.)
I had to admit, it would be exciting to see what new life might have developed in a place such as this, especially if it ran even deeper than our predictions… and that excitement was enough to make me chase the fear of the risks out of my mind, even if it was only briefly. While Sheila went to make sure we were ready to embark, I caught myself wandering out toward the rear of the ship where my submarine, The Tempura, waited for me. Did this submarine deserve a better name than The Tempura? Probably. But, this was my project, so I got to name it and since Burger was already taken, Tempura was the next best name I had. I liked to think that the subs namesake might approve… if she hadn’t died fifteen years ago. Shrimp don’t live very long.
As the ship began to depart, I caught myself reminiscing on how I’d ended up here… it really was all because of those damn shrimp, wasn’t it? Well… maybe not all because of the shrimp. But they were certainly part of it. Back when I was a lot younger, I never really gave much of a shit about anything at all. I guess I did have a thing for the ocean… the great, romantic vastness of it. The sense of adventure that it beckoned with. The endless mysteries that lay within its dark depths. I used to read about it all the time when I was a kid and I especially loved the classic adventures: Verne’s 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea, and Melville’s Moby Dick… but that love was just confined to my books. I didn’t really have any interest in actually going out and seeing the ocean. Hell, the idea of going to a beach and standing in the sun with my toes in the sand seemed miserable to me. I was happier (although calling myself happy might’ve been a little disingenuous) alone in my room, enjoying the company of books as opposed to people.
Then came the shrimp.
One of my online friends kept them as a hobby. He used to post pictures of his tanks all the time, and I always thought they looked kinda cool. He said that if I was interested in them, I should try keeping some for myself, and during a particularly bad bout of depression, I figured that maybe it might be worth a shot. So, I bought a cheap tank and some cheap decorations, bought myself some shrimp… and promptly watched them die over the next few weeks. That… that bothered me. I don’t know why but… it really bothered me. I’m still not entirely sure how to describe what it was that I was feeling. Guilt? Defeat? Shame? Here I was, trying to set up a habitat for these creatures just to have something to do to keep the suicidal ideation at bay, and I’d failed almost right out of the gate.
Was I just that bad? Was I just that much of a failure? Was this just going to go to shit just like everything else in my life did, because I was just such an abysmal piece of shit who barely deserved the life she had? Had I just not tried hard enough? Was I too apathetic? What had happened? What went wrong?
It bothered me.
It bothered me enough that I made up my mind to just dump the remaining shrimp down the toilet and toss everything. Forget about it. Move on. End of story. But… that wasn’t fair, was it? The shrimp didn’t all deserve to die just because I couldn’t be bothered, did they? Sure, they were just shrimp, but they were alive too, just like me. They deserved to be alive.
I owed it to them to try and keep them alive, didn’t I?
So… I didn’t dump the shrimp.
Instead, I started doing some reading. Started looking into what I was doing wrong and how to do it all better. I actually got really into it and a few months later, I had a nice planted tank. Looking back, it was amateur shit… but it made me happy. I’d even picked out names for my two favorite shrimp. Burger and Tempura. They’d been the last survivors of my original batch, and they were the ones I ended up caring about the most. Caring for Burger and Tempura gave me a purpose. It became an obsession… and that little obsession drove me to finally start turning my life around.
Like I said, shrimp don’t live for very long. Burger and Tempura were long dead by the time I graduated with a degree in Marine Biology. But they were the ones who inspired me to finally get my life in order. Hell, the shrimp were half the reason that I met Sheila. She was something of an aquarium fanatic too… we’d met on a forum, and gotten to talking. I found out that she just so happened to be studying Marine Biology at another school, and we bonded pretty quickly after that. After graduation, I moved to California to be with her and after that, the rest is history. She was my rock. She was the one who always pushed me to be the best possible version of myself… and I loved her more than I ever knew I could love someone.
A glance back at the shore, fading into the distance tore me out of my reminiscing, and I shifted my focus to the present, going over The Tempura to perform some quick checks. My colleagues and I would be checking and rechecking the submarine over the next two days as we made our way toward the dive spot. Considering the danger that descending that deep posed, I didn’t want to take a single unnecessary risk.
I had too much to live for, after all.
***
The day of the dive, I couldn’t notice how excited the rest of the crew seemed… well… Sheila’s usual crew seemed excited. I guess to them, this was just another research expedition, no different than the ones Sheila usually took this ship out on. Lately her research had been focused on the analysis and study of whale calls. Her recent voyages had involved following their pods, recording their calls and playing them back to see how the whales reacted. It was fascinating stuff, but my research was admittedly a lot different than that.
My obsession had drawn me to the denizens of the deep sea. I’d used The Burger for expeditions before, although none of them had been on quite the same scale as this one. Up until today, the most ambitious thing I’d done was send down unmanned submersibles with cameras. Those submersibles had typically returned. We had lost a few early on due to technical glitches, but the past few years had been blissfully uneventful. Logically, this dive would probably be uneventful as well. But it was still hard to get the jitters out of my head.
My team and I did the final checks necessary to make sure that The Tempura was good to go, before setting up the crane to begin lifting it up. In less than an hour, I’d be inside of that thing, descending to the darkest depths of the ocean.
It didn’t feel real.
I felt Sheila’s hand on my shoulder, and looked over at her.
“Moment of truth, huh?” She asked. She probably meant it to sound encouraging, but it just sounded ominous.
“Moment of truth…” I replied.
“You’re gonna be okay, honey. I know you will.”
She reached out to gently squeeze my hand and gave me a reassuring smile that I meekly returned.
“Yeah, it’s gonna be okay,” I agreed, although there was an element of a lie in it. Statistically, yes. It probably WOULD be okay. But there was that lingering anxiety in the back of my mind that just wouldn’t go away. I looked quietly out at the submarine before me and couldn’t shake the thought that it sort of looked like a giant coffin. Unconsciously, I found myself squeezing Sheila’s hand tighter than normal. She just held me close and pressed a kiss to the top of my head, before gently rubbing my back.
“You’ll be okay,” She promised.
“Dr. Jenner, we’re ready for you.” I heard one of my colleagues say.
Moment of truth.
I took one last look at Sheila, and gave her a quick kiss on the lips for luck. She smiled at me, and I smiled back anxiously at her before heading over toward the submarine.
The crew helped me enter the cockpit and get myself situated inside. The cockpit of the Tempura was fairly cramped and not particularly comfortable. Space and comfort aren’t really luxuries you can afford in a submarine like this. The instruments I needed took up a lot of space, leaving little room for me in there… and I am not a very big person.
Once I was inside, they sealed the hatch. Then the diagnostics checks began.
“Grayson, can you hear us in there?” I heard Sheila say through the radio.
“Loud and clear,” I replied.
“Great. We’ll keep in constant radio contact, just to monitor the signal. In the meanwhile, how’s everything looking in there?”
“Green across the board so far,” I said, although I hadn’t finished running all my final checks yet. Ultimately, nothing was out of place.
This submarine was as good to go as it was going to get.
“I’m all good in here,” I said once I was done. “You can drop me when you’re ready.”
“You got it, honey. Let’s get you in the water, run one final round of tests and start lowering you down.”
A short while later, I felt the submarine begin to move as the crane lifted it off the deck and lowered it into the water. The Tempura honestly resembled its namesake in a way, being long and cigar shaped, only vertically oriented instead of horizontally oriented. We’d admittedly taken more than a few design cues from James Cameron’s Deepsea Challenger. Why fix what isn’t broken, after all?
Once I was in the water, a 1000 pound releasable ballast weight would cause the submarine to sink. Releasing that weight was also my ticket back to the surface, and I could either trigger it from inside the cockpit, or, in the event that the release failed for any reason, it would trigger automatically after roughly 12 hours of exposure to salt water.
Ideally, this would be the first of a number of dives I’d be undertaking… and if all went according to plan, the Tempura could be the first of many similar submarines that would allow other researchers to safely and effectively descend to extreme depths. If all went well, this could be a massive leap forward for researchers like me, allowing us to better explore the deepest depths of the Hadal Zone and learn all we could about the ecosystems down there via direct observation.
If all went well.
If.
Through the viewport, I watched as I was lowered into the ocean. A few of the other crew members had donned diving gear to escort me down, and after they did their final checks and I did mine, we were fully ready to go.
“All’s green across the board,” I said into the radio. “You can start my descent.”
“I hear you, honey,” Sheila replied. “We’re letting you go. Have fun down there.”
“Yeah, I’ll try…” I said quietly as finally, my submarine began its descent.
I took a deep breath, and told myself again that everything would go fine. We had checked everything on this submarine. We’d tested it rigorously. I wouldn’t have allowed myself to set foot inside of it if I hadn’t personally assured that it was safe. But anxiety never really goes away, does it? The crew couldn’t accompany me far. After only a few meters, they fell behind me as I sank deeper and deeper into the infinite, empty blue of the ocean. Soon after, the tether was released.
I was officially on my own.
“60 feet,” I heard Sheila say over the radio. “How are you doing in there?”
“Good,” I replied. “Doing… doing good.”
The submarine continued to descend. Through the viewport, I could see a few stray fish, but nothing particularly eye catching. I almost felt alone down there… almost…
“120 feet…” Sheila said.
“Still doing good,” I replied.
The descent continued, as the waters slowly grew darker and darker.
“400 feet…”
Everything around me just kept getting darker and darker. Only a fraction of the light from the sun ever reached these depths… and I’d be lying if I said that darkness didn’t feel a little… oppressive.
“800 feet… still feeling good?”
“Yeah, still feeling good…” I said, although it was a bit of a lie. If anything, I was second guessing all of this, but I wasn’t about to say that out loud.
“1000 feet… still good?”
“Still good…” I murmured. “I hear you loud and clear.”
Deeper… deeper… deeper.
“1500 feet…”
Three miles. I was three miles away from home. Three miles away from Sheila.
“2000 feet…”
Still a ways to go.
“3000 feet…”
By this point, it was fully dark outside of my cockpit. Outside, all I could see was inky darkness. Even the submarine’s lights didn’t really cut through it. And the kicker? Relatively speaking, I wasn’t that deep. Fishing trawlers reached deeper than this. Better to conserve power until I was at the bottom. My descent continued.
“6000 feet… still good?”
“Still good…”
The check ins were becoming less frequent. My descent still continued… deeper… deeper… deeper. By now, I’d entered the Hadal Zone. But there was still so much deeper o go.
“8000 feet…”
This was past the depths that most whales would dive to… and I still had a ways to go.
“10,000 feet.”
This was close to where the ocean floor usually bottomed out… and yet there was still so much further to go. No. I was really only a third of the way there. How long had it been?Not much had happened beyond my descent and a few sightings out of my viewport, but time had been passing. A glance at my watch confirmed it’d been almost an hour since I’d started to sink… and I knew I wasn’t even close to the bottom yet. The submarine continued to descend, sinking ever deeper as I dropped into an infinite darkness that few had ever dared to witness.
“15,000 feet.”
This check in came later than the others. At this point, Sheila and the crew must have figured that no news was good news, and they were right. I just continued to sink peacefully, down into the crushing depths of the ocean.
These were the depths that one might normally find deep sea fish… and yet I was going somewhere even deeper than that.
“20,000 feet…”
So close…
I continued to sink.
“25,000 feet.”
Soon… and finally…
“30,000 feet. You still doing alright, honey?”
“Yeah… yeah, I’m doing good,” I assured her. I was so close…
By this point, my real work had begun. I’d engaged the lights and begun documenting what little I could see using the on board cameras. Granted, there wasn’t much life at these depths and what little there was, was scarcely documented. Most of what was down here consisted of invertebrates and microscopic life that seemed to float past my viewport.
The light seemed to draw a few creatures in search of food. Small, hardy things that resembled shrimp.
“How’s it looking, Grayson?”
“Dark,” I said, half joking. “We’ve got some life… shrimp. They’re translucent. Can’t get a great look at them… but we’ll see what the cameras pick up.”
“They’ve recognized you as a friend,” Sheila said. I could almost see the smile on her lips as she said it.
“Yeah…” I replied, “Tempura sent them a message, told them I’d be down. How am I looking on depth?”
“35,000 feet… you seeing a bottom yet?”
“No… not that I would until I was there.”
“Damn… how deep does this go?”
“It can’t go that deep…” I murmured, although I really wasn’t so sure about that.
The submarine continued to sink…
36,000 feet…
37,000 feet…
38,000 feet… and then finally, just past the 39,000 foot mark, I finally saw solid ground below me.
Looking through my viewport, I could see a familiar dark brown diatomaceous sludge, covering the seafloor. Microscopic life, likely similar to what had been observed in other deep sea trenches, such as the Challenger Deep.
I needed to gather a sample.
As my submarine reached the bottom, I extended the mechanical arms, pressed flat against the surface of the Tempura, and opened the collection port near the bottom of the ship. Slowly, I sifted some of the sludge into the port. My disturbance of the seafloor kicked up a cloud of the microbial colony, and I could’ve sworn I saw something wiggling through the debris. A pale, white thing, perhaps some sort of sea cucumber? I hastily angled my submarines camera to try and catch a glimpse of it, before returning to my collection. Even in this forlorn place, there was still so much to see! And here I was… completely forgetting my fear as the excitement took hold of me! Few people had ever been down to these unfathomable depths… and yet here I was.
It didn’t feel real but it was! I had reached the deepest part of the ocean!
“How’s it going down there?” I heard Sheila ask. Her voice was a little garbled. The connection down here was faltering.
“It’s beautiful…” I said. “I can’t wait for you to see it!”
“I’ll bet…”
“I’m going to do a sweep of the area, see what samples I can gather,” I said. “What’s my time right now?”
“Three hours. You’ve got nine before your connection to the weight deteriorates and you start to ascend.”
“I’ll make the most of it,” I said. The plan was only to stay down there for six hours, and I didn’t want to push that limit. Life support would only last me for so long, and one little error was all it would take for the ungodly pressure down here to crush me.
I began to move the submarine. Mobility was limited. This thing wasn’t built to travel far. But I still had some limited movement. I recorded all that I could, filming the shrimp that investigated my light, and the things that slithered and crawled through the muck, likely feeding on the carpet of single celled organisms that populated these depths.
The first two hours were… well… I hesitate to call them uneventful, they were actually very fascinating, but little of note happened beyond my recording of a few specimens.
Midway through the third hour though, as I was reaching one of the rock walls of the abyss, I noticed something just above the edge of my viewport swimming away from the light. I could’ve sworn I saw slender, pale tentacles of some sort. Was that a squid? Were there squid down this deep? I wasn’t aware of any species of known squid who could reach these depths… but in this unknown place, what use was the known?
I moved my light and my camera to try and catch another glimpse of it, but whatever it was, it seemed to be gone. Maybe I’d see another one. I still had plenty of time.
“You made a noise. What’d you see?” Sheila asked.
“Something big… I think,” I said.
“Down there? Like a fish?”
“Squid. You wouldn’t find any vertebrates down this deep… the pressure would crush their bones.”
“Jeez…”
I didn’t reply to that, still searching for the thing I’d seen. I shone my light up along the walls of the chasm and angled my camera up as far as it would go. I could see a few volcanic vents, spewing dark clouds into the darkness, and more diatoms. But not much else. Strange invertebrates crawled along the walls. Small creatures, no bigger than an inch long. Related to isopods, perhaps? If I could collect one as a sample, I would have… although taking any of those back to the surface would surely kill them. They were built to live under the impossible pressure of these depths. Taking them to the surface would rip them apart.
I went back to my research, and it wasn’t long until I saw something in the darkness, just on the edge of where my flashlight reached. Trailing white tendrils, snaking their way through the darkness. My eyes narrowed as I moved the submarine forward, trying to catch whatever it was in the light. I saw the shape move, its body turning… I saw its tendrils unfurling. Whatever this was, it was big. It was almost as big as The Tempura… although it was also slender. If I didn’t know any better, I would’ve thought I was looking at some sort of floating debris, but this far down? No. And debris wouldn’t move like that.
This had to be a deepsea squid… or perhaps some other type of cephalopod? Something that preyed upon the various invertebrates down here, perhaps? It seemed to float, just out of sight for a bit, as I tried to get closer. I angled up my light to get a better look at it. The light seemed to shine through it, like some sort of ghost… but I did manage to get a look at it.
Although that look…
That single look made me freeze up.
This things slender tendrils certainly resembled a cephalopod of some sort, but the rest of it… the rest of it looked like something else entirely. Its body was thin, emaciated and translucent, yet despite that it still had characteristics that almost seemed… human. It wasn’t human! Not by any stretch of imagination, but the resemblance was there. It almost reminded me of an exhibit I’d seen in a museum once, depicting a preserved, fully removed human nervous system. I could see a similar shape in its translucent body. Its head seemed almost human as well… albeit with no eyes, and a lamprey like mouth I could only describe as fleshy yet crablike.
Still, despite having no eyes I couldn’t shake the feeling that it was looking at me. And that was when I felt something hit the submarine.
I felt a sudden jolt of panic in my chest. For a moment, I thought that the pressure had started to crush me, but no… no, everything was still fine. Something had just hit me. But what? It didn’t take long before I got my answer.
Another pale creature floated past my viewport, swirling gracefully in the cold dark waters. I watched it for a moment with wide eyes, before noticing its ‘head’ turning slightly toward me. Then, almost instantly, it launched itself at the submarine, darting toward me with blinding speed.
I heard a distinct THUD as its body collided with me, and I could see its pale tendrils pressing against the viewport, twisting and writhing violently. It was trying to attack me. The first creature that I’d seen lunged as well, pounding on my submarine with another THUD. And moments later, I could hear more impacts against the hull. There were more of them… and they did not like having me down there.
“What’s going on?” Sheila asked.
“Somebody doesn’t like me…” I said. “One of the animals down here… some kind of squid, it’s just started attacking the hull.”
“How bad is the damage?”
“Not sure… could be nothing, could be-”
I felt the submarine shake as I tried to move it. The thrusters that pushed me forward weren't responding. Had something gotten caught in it? One of the creatures perhaps?
“Grayson?!” Sheila asked.
“Lost propulsion…” I said. “Fuck… I can’t move.”
“Then drop the weight and come up!”
“No, it’s fine, there’s no other damage, I can still use the port and starboard thrusters to-”
“Grayson!”
I paused. There was genuine panic in her voice… enough to make me realize that even if these things stood little chance of actually breaching the hull, taking the risk would be a fatal mistake.
“I’m on my way up…” I finally said, before reaching out to disengage the ballast weights.
Immediately, I felt myself beginning to rise, although the tentacles clinging to my viewport didn’t disappear.
“We’ve got you…” Sheila said. “Rising up to 38,000 feet.”
The submarine continued to rise, but the creatures clinging to me went nowhere. In fact… I was sure I could see more of them. More pale shapes coming up through the darkness, and these ones filled me with dread. I thought I had been looking at some sort of eerie undiscovered life. But seeing what was coming up toward me now… I knew that I was looking at so much more. The creatures swimming up toward me through the darkness carried weapons… makeshift stone spears and daggers. Primitive tools… but tools all the same.
Signs that these were more than just undiscovered animals.
Much. Much more.
The word: ‘Mermaids’ crossed through my mind, but these were something far different than the ones I’d heard of in folklore. These looked like they’d swam out of the depths of hell itself. Boneless pale tendrils reached for me… and they were getting closer. The pale shapes reached my submarine as I rose higher. I kept praying to whatever God may be listening that the dropping pressure would force them off. The air in a submarine is pressurized, so during normal operation, there should have been no danger of decompression sickness for me.
For them… well… normally I’d feel a little guilty about subjecting an undiscovered species of deep sea mermaids to the horrors of the Bends. But given my circumstances, I didn’t have a lot of other options.
They didn’t let go, though.
They should have. But they didn’t.
What were these things?
I saw a splayed hand press against my viewport. Or… it somewhat resembled a hand. It had suckers on it, like a tentacle and the ‘fingers’ curled open like tentacles. The creature crawled over my viewport, clinging to The Tempura as it rose, and I could see the folds of its crablike mouth opening and pressing against the glass. I could see some sort of bile rising up through its translucent throat, before it secreted it all over my viewport. Was it trying to digest me? Was that how these things fed? How strong were its stomach acids? Were they strong enough to-
The window cracked.
My heart skipped a beat.
“No… no, no no…”
“Grayson, what’s wrong?!”
“They cracked the window… S-Sheila they… oh God… oh fuck, they just…”
“THEY DID WHAT?”
“It’s secreting some sort of enzyme… it’s on the window, it’s… FUCK… I’m gonna die… I’m gonna die… I’m gonna die…”
“You’re not gonna die, baby! Just… just keep ascending, okay? You’re at 30,000 feet… just keep going…”
I nodded, and kept on rising, although the question of whether or not the rest of the creatures were trying to digest the other parts of my submarine floated through my mind. How much damage could The Tempura take before it imploded? How much longer did I have? The submarine still continued to rise… 25,000 feet… almost halfway home… almost… almost.
The creature outside of my viewport slithered along the glass, searching for a better area to try and digest. Past him, I noticed a few of his companions dropping off. Maybe the change in pressure finally was getting to them?
From the corner of my eye, I suddenly noticed a flashing light. A warning. The hydraulics on one of the Tempura’s arms were shot… what else was damaged?
I checked my oxygen levels. 32%.
I should’ve had at least 14 hours of air. I’d only been down there for about 6 hours… I shouldn’t have been this low.
31%.
No… no, no, no, no… they’d damaged the air tanks!
30%.
29%
“20,000 feet!” Sheila said. “You still with me, baby?”
“Y-yeah…” I said. I didn’t mention my air situation. I didn’t need to worry her further.
The submarine continued its ascent.
15,000 feet.
24%. I was running out of time.
The creatures still clung to the Tempura. How had the pressure change not killed them yet? My oxygen was dropping faster than before. I was hemorrhaging air. Another crack formed across my viewport. I let out a little, involuntary gasp before trying to force myself to stop hyperventilating.
“Grayson, what was that?”
“I-it’s fine…” I stammered, “It’s fine!”
“Grayson what the hell is going on down there?!”
“They’re still on the submarine… they’re still…” I paused, looking at my oxygen levels. “19%...”
“19% of what? Grayson what’s going on!”
I paused.
18%.
“Air… I’m… I’m losing air…”
“That’s fine, you’re going to make it!” She said, although I heard her voice cracking a little. “You’re gonna make it!”
I didn’t answer.
12,000 feet.
11,000 feet…
My oxygen level continued to drop.
15%.
14%.
12%.
9,000 feet.
The creatures still clung to me, as the submarine continued to rise. The one on my viewport was still there, slowly crawling along the glass again. I stared into its eyeless face and swore I was looking at the face of my killer.
7,000 feet…
Oxygen had dropped to 9%. It dropped to 8% before I even got to 6,000 feet. I was going to die here…
The viewport cracked again and I squeezed my eyes shut. The submarine rocked. I was sure one of the thrusters had been damaged. My ascent slowed.
“Grayson, what’s going on?”
“I’m sorry Sheila…”
Another crack spread across my viewport.
“I’m… I’m not making it back up…”
“YES YOU ARE!”
“I’m sorry…” The tears started to come as the reality of my death became clearer and clearer… this was it.
“YOU’RE COMING BACK UP, YOU HEAR ME! GODDAMNIT, I’LL BRING YOU BACK UP!”
“I love you…”
That creatures face pressed against the glass. It vomited more of its stomach acid onto the cracked glass, and I wondered if this might finally be what broke it. Part of me hoped it would be… the one good thing about dying this deep was that at least I’d die quickly. My suffering would be over. Then, the creature suddenly pulled back, twisting and writhing violently. I saw other shapes moving past it in the water, other ‘mermaids’ that had been clinging to the submarine.
Something was agitating them.
Something was scaring them off.
Then I heard it, over the radio… whale songs.
“What the hell…?”
“Grayson, are you still there?!”
“I… they’re finally breaking off. Sheila, what did you do?”
“I’m broadcasting some of the orca recordings we’ve been using. Are they still clinging to you?”
“No! They’re backing off! I… whatever you’re doing, keep doing it!”
The submarine kept rising.
5,000 feet.
4,000 feet.
4% oxygen.
I could still do this, right?
The submarine continued to rise.
3%.
3,000 feet.
2,000 feet.
2%.
1,000 feet… so close… I was so close…
I could almost see the surface through my viewport, rushing up toward me. I tried not to breathe. Tried not to move. All I did was hope.
500 feet.
I closed my eyes.
“Grayson we have your signal, we’re coming to pick you up!”
Sheila’s voice sounded so far away as my submarine finally breached the surface of the water… and with the last of my strength, I pulled the emergency release on the hatch, and threw it open, taking in lungful after lungful of fresh salty air.
I didn’t dare so much as touch the water beneath me… but I was topside again, and in the distance, I could see The Burger!
“We see you!” Sheila said, “We’ve got you baby… we’ve got you…”
“I see you too…” I said through the tears. “Thank you… thank you…” I didn’t have any words left in me after that.
As soon as I was back on the ship, I collapsed into Sheila’s arms, breaking down into tears as I clung to her, terrified that at any moment, some sort of unspoken other shoe would drop and I’d lose her all over again.
“Shh… it’s alright baby… I’ve got you… you’re safe… you’re safe…” I felt her fingers running through my air and I knew that what she said was true.
I was home.
I was safe.
***
I left my colleagues to review the data that the Tempura gathered during its short expedition. As far as I know, they haven’t published anything. I have a few ideas as to why, but I’ll keep those to myself. Let’s just say that some people would rather this information not become public.
I have a feeling that the Tempura may not be diving again for some time, if ever. I will confess that I do consider that a bit of a shame. Despite everything… I would consider it a success. It endured far more stressful conditions than I had expected, and from what I heard, required fewer repairs than I’d thought it would. But, even if it was approved for another dive, it wouldn’t be me piloting it. No. I will never be setting foot inside of that machine again, nor will I ever be returning to what my colleagues have been quietly referring to as ‘The Jenner Trench’.
I can’t.
Every night, I wake up crying after dreaming of pale shapes outside of my cracked viewport, clinging to Sheila and sobbing. I can’t put myself in that situation again.
I can’t.
Instead, I think I’m going to spend the next few years on solid ground. There’s a teaching position available at a local university. I think that might be the best place for me right now. Who knows, maybe I can help some other deadbeat discover a passion for marine biology.
After everything, my love for the sea remains unchanged… I’m just a little more wary of it, these days.

My best friend was in love with me the entirety of our relationship I think. I moved in with my cousin (f26) and her friends both male 28 when I(f) was 23. It was the most fun loving, kind group of people I’d known to that point. Going home at the end of the day really felt like going home more than I’d ever felt.
I especially connected with J and I often thought to myself over the 2 years of living together that I could die happily in a nursing home laughing about life with him.
We’d all go out a lot to the bars and it would always be a super fun night. But a couple of times, J would come onto me afterwards, and I didn’t want that so I would push him away and tell him no. And I would explain afterward that I loved him as a friend.. my best friend, which pales in comparison to hear as a response, but I sincerely meant it and he seemed to accept it well.
3 years later, I moved away and J and I stayed in regular contact over the phone/text. From my vantage, I was so happy my best friend and I had worked through our feelings and could stay in close contact.. and that wasn’t the case..
Eventually he disclosed that he was in love with me and we had a final conversation where I explained that I was not attracted to him… I loved him as my best friend and that wasn’t enough for him.
How could I be so completely in love with someone that I regularly thought, “I could die happy with this person”, and yet the idea of intimacy was repulsive?
I still don’t have an answer. We met up after 7 years this winter and the same scenario unfortunately played out..
At this point in my life, I suppose I live healthily in the belief that sexual compatibility and friendship will combine into one romantic love, but if this relationship spells one thing out way too clearly for me, it’s that on some level, you really don’t choose who you love.

3.0. THE THIRD BUDDHIST COUNCIL:

Venerable Moggaliputta Tissa Thera led the 3rd Buddhist Council of Theravada School. That was not a schism as the outsiders were not the true members of the Sangha. However, the king supported them like the members of the Sangha.

Because it helped promote tolerance and mutual respect, Asoka desired that people should be well-learned (bahu sruta) in the good doctrines (kalanagama) of other people's religions. [The Edicts of King Asokaan, English rendering by Ven. S. Dhammika © 1994]

King Asoka was supporting everyone who claimed he belonged to the Dhamma-Vinaya community (the Sangha) established by the Sakyamuni. However, they did not join the Dhamma-Vinaya community, nor know, nor care the Buddha's teaching.
Venerable Moggaliputta Tissa Thera determined that "the Vibhajjavāda alone contained the teaching of the Buddha."

Rest of the monks who were true believers, told about the doctrine of the Buddha, that it was Vibhajjavāda i.e. the religion of analytical reasoning. This answer was supported by Moggaliputta-Tissa who was present there. He told that the Buddha was Vibhajjavādin (analyser). The Thera was made the gurdian of the Order. To purify the Sangha, the king requested to hold the Uposatha ceremony.

Uposatha

uposatha : [m.] Sabbath day; observance of 8 precepts; biweekly recitation of the Vinaya rules by a chapter of Buddhist monks.
Mūḷuposatha sutta (AN 3.70), (Bhikkhu Bodhi)

“There are, Visākhā, three kinds of uposatha. What three? The cowherds’ uposatha, the Nigaṇṭhas’ uposatha, and the noble ones’ uposatha [...] (3) “And how, Visākhā, is the noble ones’ uposatha observed? The defiled mind is cleansed by exertion. And how is the defiled mind cleansed by exertion?

The mentioned uposatha ceremony is for the monks to recite the Vinaya rules. It cannot be observed with the participation of the public, including the monks (and priests) from other religions.

[Uposatha (Thanissaro Bhikkhu)] The monastic observance may be held in one of four ways, depending on the size of the Community in a particular territory: If four bhikkhus or more, they meet for a recitation of the Pāṭimokkha; if three, they declare their mutual purity to one another; if two, they declare their purity to each other; if one, he marks the day by determining it as his uposatha. In addition to these regular observance days, the Buddha gave permission for a Community to recite the Pāṭimokkha only on one other occasion: when unity has been reestablished in the Community. This, the Commentary says, refers only to occasions when a major dispute in the Community has been settled (such as a schism—see Chapter 21), and not to occasions when the uposatha has been suspended for minor reasons. Thus there are two occasions on which the bhikkhus are allowed to meet for the uposatha: the last day of the lunar fortnight and the day for reestablishing unity.

The public uposatha is open to everyone, including non-Buddhists. The participants are expected to observe a set of uposatha sīla, either 8, 9 or 10 (aṭṭha-sīla, navanga-sīla or dasa-sīla).
uposathika : [adj.] one who observes [uposatha] precepts.

Aṭṭha-sīla 8 (Uposatha, Uposatha-sīla): 6. Vikālabhojanā veramaṇī； 7. Naccagītavāditavisūkadassanā mālāgandhavilepanadhāraṇamaṇanavibhūsanaṭṭhānā veramaṇī； 8. Uccāsayanamahāsayanā veramaṇī;

On the basis of not-Dhamma as ‘Dhamma’… Dhamma as ‘not-Dhamma’… not-Vinaya as ‘Vinaya’… Vinaya as ‘not-Vinaya’, Emperor Asoka expelled the non-Vibhajjavādis who could not observe the uposatha, including the Sarvāstivādis, from the Sangha.

[Schism (Thanissaro Bhikkhu)] Ven. Upāli: “‘A split in the Community, a split in the Community (saṅgha-bheda)’ it is said. To what extent is the Community split?” The Buddha: “There is the case where they explain not-Dhamma as ‘Dhamma’… Dhamma as ‘not-Dhamma’… not-Vinaya as ‘Vinaya’… Vinaya as ‘not-Vinaya’… [...] a light offense as ‘a heavy offense’… a heavy offense as ‘a light offense’… an offense leaving a remainder as ‘an offense leaving no remainder’… an offense leaving no remainder as ‘an offense leaving a remainder’… a serious offense as ‘a not-serious offense’… a not-serious offense as ‘a serious offense.’ On the basis of these eighteen grounds they pull away, pull apart, they perform a separate uposatha, perform a separate Invitation, perform a separate Community transaction. To this extent the Community is split.”—Cv.VII.5.2

Devadatta caused the first schism on the basic of Vinaya rules. The Vajjian monks caused the second schism on the same ground. The Sangha established by the Sakyamuni was attacked several times from within.

Vibhajjavādi Dhamma Missions

Emperor Asoka sent forth nine missionaries to nine different countries to propagate the religion of the Buddha and crowned it with success... also the Bhikkuni Sangha in Aparantaka, Suvannabhumi and Ceylon.

Emperor Asoka sent his son and daughter, Arahant Maha Mahinda Thera and Arahant Sanghamitta Theri, to Sri Lanka, where the events of the 3rd Buddhist Council were recorded.
"Arahant Mahinda, who introduced the Buddhadhamma to Sri Lanka, is the Redactor of the Buddhapåjàva in Sinhala Buddhism."
Sri Lanka became a foothold of the Dhamma-Vinaya Tradition. Suvannabhumi was also a foothold where Thera-vada Buddhism thrives presently.

Vibhajjavādi Dhamma Paṭisambhidā-ñāṇa

Analytical Knowledge (Paṭisambhidā-ñāṇa) allows the arahants to reason and teach in detail analytically. Understanding the nature of the Teachings of the Buddha and the Sangha, Venerable Moggaliputta Tissa Thera described them as Vibhajjavādis. That is Theravada, the doctrine of the arahants. Dhamma paṭisambhidā-ñāṇa is the ability to analytically and in detail explain the nature of reality.
The Buddha as an awakened sage is neither a theorist nor a philosopher. Theravada is not philosophy. The Buddha is an arahant.
The Buddha's disciples, who are also arahants, know the Four Noble Truths through their own observation and release from delusion. Knowing modern views and modern science is not their task. They are not philosophers and philosophical scholars. They do not claim to possess omniscience.

Titthiya Sutta (Sectarians):

[The Buddha advises the monks,] you should answer those wanderers of other sects in this way, ‘Friends, passion carries little blame and is slow to fade. Aversion carries great blame and is quick to fade. Delusion carries great blame and is slow to fade. [Thanissaro Bhikkhu]

3.1. Kaccānagotta Sutta (Right View)

Kaccānagotta Sutta Pali:

‘sammādiṭṭhi sammādiṭṭhī’ti, bhante, vuccati. Kittāvatā nu kho, bhante, sammādiṭṭhi hotī’’ti?... ‘‘‘Sabbaṃ atthī’ti kho, kaccāna, ayameko anto. ‘Sabbaṃ natthī’ti ayaṃ dutiyo anto. Ete te, kaccāna, ubho ante anupagamma majjhena tathāgato dhammaṃ deseti – ‘avijjāpaccayā saṅkhārā; saṅkhārapaccayā… L. Feer, Saṃyutta-nikāya,V. 16 —[copied from Early Buddhism: A New Definition (Vijitha Kumara, page 130)]

• sammādiṭṭhi : right view
• What is the right view, bhante?

Sarvāstivāda

Sarvāstivāda means "those who claim that everything exists" [...] the Sarvāstivādins suggest that "everything," that is all conditioned factors (dharma), "exist" and can exert causal efficacy in the three time periods of the past, present, and future. [Sarvastivada And Mulasarvastivada (Encyclopedia.com)]

The main Sarvāstivādi concept 'all dhamma exist in all three times' was familiar to the Buddha, not because He taught it, but because He rejected it.

'Everything exists': That is one extreme. 'Everything doesn't exist': That is a second extreme. Avoiding these two extremes, the Tathagata teaches the Dhamma via the middle: From ignorance as a requisite condition come fabrications (saṅkhārā). From fabrications as a requisite condition comes consciousness. [Kaccānagotta Sutta (SN 12:15) (Thanissaro Bhikkhu)]

Somehow, that concept, despite the Buddha's famous rejection, came to associate with Buddhism once again, not because the Buddha taught it, but the outsiders made it as if the Buddha accepted it.
We, too, must reject the notion of 'everything exists' just the way the Buddha rejected it. The rejection is also present in the paṭicca samuppāda, as He explains:

Imagine two sheaves of reeds the one leaning against the other. In the same way consciousness depends on named-shapes, named shapes depend on consciousness [...] birth depends on existing, aging and death depend on birth — the coming into existence of upset, grief, lamentation, pain and misery. [...] If, however, friend, I were to remove one of those sheaves of reeds one would fall down if I were to remove the other the other would fall down. — SN 5.67 [Dependant Uprising, Downbound Dependent Own-making (Dependent Origination, Conditioned Genesis, The Causal Law),

The Paṭicca Samuppāda provides two sheaves of reeds that support each other, but one of them can be removed to topple them both. When they are toppled, we cannot say everything exists. The Buddha's Dhamma, which shows us the four Paramattha, is nothing like a "dharma theory" that was created by the Sarvāstivādis.
Kaccānagotta Sutta continues:

[The Buddha:] By & large, Kaccayana, this world is supported by (takes as its object) a polarity, that of existence & non-existence. But when one sees the origination of the world as it actually is with right discernment, 'non-existence' with reference to the world does not occur to one. When one sees the cessation of the world as it actually is with right discernment, 'existence' with reference to the world does not occur to one. "By & large, Kaccayana, this world is in bondage to attachments, clingings (sustenances), & biases

3.2. Vibhajyavāda & The Present Dhamma

The Tibetan Buddhist Encyclopedia:

vibhajyavāda; A school of thought doctrinally opposed to the Sarvāstitvāda. holds that the present dharma-s alone exist. However, some among them like the followers of the Kāśyapīya, concede that the past karma that have not yet given fruit (adatta-phala) can also be said to exist.

Here is a part of Magganga Dipani by Ledi Sayadaw:

kammassakata samma-ditthi Sabbesatta kammadayada, kamayoni, kammabandhu kammappatisarana yam kammam karissanti kalyanam va papakam va tassadayada bhavissanti. Sabbe satta kammassaka: There exist such properties as elephants, horses, vehicles, cattle, fields, buildings, gold, silver, jewels, etc. Those properties can be said to belong to us in the present existence before we pass away. But when we pass away those properties do not accompany us beyond death. They are like properties which we borrow for some time for our use. They are liable to destruction during the present existence. As those properties which beings possess do not accompany them to their new existences, they cannot be claimed as properties belonging to those beings. The Buddha therefore said, 'sabbe satta kammassaka.' The only property of all beings that accompanies them is their own volitional action... [Ledi Sayadaw explains the entire thing here.]

• Venerable Mogok Sayadaw warned us to avoid sassata ditthi, the belief in permanence (nicca), 'eternity-belief'. Based on his explanation: A kamma (action) exists while it is happening between the start and the end. For example, feeding an animal: this action exists only while that animal is fed. That action cannot exist before and after that animal is fed. However, as if following the doers, the potential effect of certain wholesome and unwholesome kamma (volition) is inevitable.

Dhammacakkappavattana Sutta

Furthermore, bhikkhus, this is the dukkha ariya·sacca: jāti is dukkha, jarā is dukkha (sickness is dukkha) maraṇa is dukkha, association with what is disliked is dukkha, dissociation from what is liked is dukkha, not to get what one wants is dukkha; in short, the five upādāna'k'khandhas are dukkha.

• The Buddha introduced the Dukkha Sacca in His first sermon.
• Vedayita-dukkha: The truth is dukkha are birth, aging, death, association with what is disliked, dissociation from what is liked, and not to get what one wants.
• Bhayattha-dukkha: The truth is the constant fear of these dukkha is also dukkha.
• Due to the past wholesome and unwholesome kamma, one gets birth, aging, death, etc.
• However, Beings born in the sugati-loka do not suffer from birth, aging, and bodily pain (kayika-dukkha), as these dukkha do not exist there.
• The past unwholesome kamma do not affect these beings during their existence in sugati-loka, especially the arupa-brahmas.
• The Buddha understood the followers of Nigaṇṭha (the Nigaṇṭhas) did not know the existence of the sugati-loka. Thus, they were speculators who fell into sassatavada (eternalism) and ucchedavada (nihilism/annihilation). Details can be read here: The Buddhist Critique of Sassatavada and Ucchedavada: The Key to a proper Understanding of the Origin and the Doctrines of early Buddhism (Y. Karunadasa).
• In the Devadaha Sutta, the Buddha pointed out the mistakes of these Nigaṇṭhas.

Devadaha Sutta (the Law of Kamma)

[MN 101] “‘So, friends, it seems that you don’t know that you existed in the past, and that you did not not exist… you don’t know what is the abandoning of unskillful qualities and the attainment of skillful qualities in the here & now. That being the case, it is not proper for you to assert that, “Whatever a person experiences—pleasure, pain, or neither pleasure nor pain—all is caused by what was done in the past. Thus, with the destruction of old [kamma] through asceticism, and with the non-doing of new actions, there will be no flow into the future. With no flow into the future, there is the ending of [kamma]. With the ending of [kamma], the ending of [dukkha]. With the ending of [dukkha], the ending of feeling. With the ending of feeling, all [dukkha] will be exhausted.” (Thanissaro Bhikkhu)

• If the present is completely conditioned by the past [kamma] and if we could not break that condition to do new kamma in a condition not determined by the past, then at this present we could not even do anything intentionally (kamma) as our action would be restrained by the past kamma.

A Vibhajjavādi cannot accept Sarvāstivāda's notion of the three times:

all dharmas exist in the past, present and future, the "three times".

Past and future exist at this present moment implies they merge with the present time. Yesterday and tomorrow are today and they are so every day without meaning one can live yesterday and tomorrow today. If one's injury healed yesterday, both injury and healing exist today, right now. For three times doctrine (Sarvāstivāda), dead people are dead, alive and exist at all stages and every moment of time. Even though one has reborn countless times, one still lives in the past lives and also the future lives. One has lived the past infinity and the future infinity. As the future has also been lived, there is no way to change the future, so what will happen will happen — according to the God one believes. After one passes away, one will relive the same life again and again countless times in the past and the future. Someone who will become a Buddha is already a Buddha. Someone who will go to hell is already in hell while living this life as a human.
Rational and irrational people, including the physicists, philosophers, writers and filmmakers, took the doctrine of three times seriously and imagined time machines.
Assuming kamma (action) exists constantly (past, present and future) constitutes sassata ditthi (eternalism). Assuming actions and their effects do not exist constitutes ahetukaditthi (view of uncausedness) — see the 8th question on page181 of this book: Milindapanha: kammaphalaatthibhavapanha. King Milinda asked many questions about kamma. The answers of wisemen and philosophers of the time did not satisfy the king. He got the answers only when he met Venerable Nagasena; see A SEARCH FOR THE LEARNED (TALENT HUNT), pages12-16.
Venerable Nagasena explained how the future is yet to exist:

Can anyone point out the fruits that a tree has not yet produced, saying: “Here they are, there they are”?” [See 3.2. QUESTION REGARDING VALIDITY OF FRUIT AND RESULT OF WHOLESOME AND UNWHOLESOME]

Real is the present; the past is gone; the future is yet to exist. That is the knowledge of the arahants.
Every action has the process of existence: birth, decay and death. Understanding anicca can abandon sakkaya ditthi.
Sakkaya ditthi is a sense with which one perceives a nama-rupa complex as me, you, he, she, it, cat, dog and so on.

Right View according to the Sakyamuni

The Buddha and His disciples visited Vesāli, the capital of the Vajjians, several times, and many arahants were made there. Saccaka, who the Buddha addressed as Aggivessana, was a famous Jain teacher of the Licchavi rājās. They accompanied Saccaka when he went to challenge the Buddha. There a famous debate on anattavada occurred, as recorded in the famous Cula-Saccaka Sutta.

[The Buddha asked,] “Well, Aggivessana, when you say that [rūpa] is self, do you have power over that [rūpa]. Can you have your [rūpa] be any different than it is?” Saccaka could not answer and remained silent [...] “Released they are endowed with unsurpassed Right View, unsurpassed practice, and unsurpassed release. Released, they honor and respect the Tathagata in this manner: The Buddha teaches the Dhamma for awakening (to Four Noble Truths), the Buddha teaches the Dhamma to develop restraint, the Buddha teaches the Dhamma for developing tranquility, the Buddha teaches the Dhamma for ending samsara (ignorance). The Buddha teaches the Dhamma for total unbinding.” (John Haspel).

• [rūpa]: The four mahabhuta (solid, liquid, gas, heat), each changes according to its nature.
• Self (atta) means the owner or arbitor of the five aggregates of clinging.
• do you have power over that [rūpa]: None of the five aggregates is self (atta).
• Vesāli became a Buddhist capital after the debate. But not all the Nigaṇṭhas were happy. Their attack on the Buddha and the Sangha never stopped. They succeeded only after a few centuries later.

3.3. QUESTION REGARDING VALIDITY OF FRUIT AND RESULT OF WHOLESOME AND UNWHOLESOME

(kammaphalaatthibhavapanha page181) 8. King Milinda said: “If, O Venerable Nagasena, with the (present) Mind-body-complex (nama-rupa) either wholesome or unwholesome kammical actions were performed where will the fruit and result of those actions (kamma) be located?” “The fruit and result of kammical actions tend to follow the Mind-body-complex, O King, like a shadow that never leaves it.” (So replied the Elder.) “Now what do you think, O King? Can any one point out the fruits which a tree has not yet produced, saying: “Here they are, there they are”?” (So asked the Elder.) “Not possible it is, O Venerable One.” (So replied the king.)

• Shadow means the potential. As long as the tree exists, the potential of fruiting of that tree exists. The fruits will be on that tree, not elsewhere. The potential never leaves the tree.
• Mahayana created the concept of Ālayavijñāna (storehouse consciousness).
  • Ālayavijñāna is also regarded as the store house of vāsanas and karmic tendencies (vāsanāparibhāvita and sarvabījaka). However, it is neither the permanent identity of a person nor a form of collective unconscious. Continuous build-up and discharge of karmic tendencies cause the ever-changing nature of ālaya-vijñāna. [Wisdom Lib]
• Compare ālayavijñāna with indestructable buddha-nature. Buddha-nature is also vijñāna/citta. Awareness is Buddha-nature.
  • [Breakthrough Sermon, Bodhidharma:] The Sutra of the Ten Stages says, “In the body of mortals is the indestructible buddha-nature [...] Our buddha-nature [the self-nature of Buddha] is awareness: to be aware and to make others aware. To realize awareness is liberation.
  • be­cause garbha (which nearly always means 'embryo' in Sanskrit) is translated by ts'ang, ( = 'womb'; lit. 'storehouse'), a certain vacuum was created in the Chinese vocabulary which the terms fo hsing and fo hsin ( = buddha-citta) neatly filled. [Rawlinson, Andrew. "The Ambiguity of the Buddha-Nature Concept in India and China."]
  • Ālayavijñāna belongs to or a part of buddha-nature (buddha-citta).
  • According to the concept of citta-matrata

THE NIYAMA-DIPANI The Manual of Cosmic Order Mahathera Ledi Sayadaw

[Kamma-Niyama] The moral order--Kamma (action) is that by which men execute, deeds, good or evil, meritorious or the opposite. What is it ? It is volition (cetana), moral or immoral. We are told in the Pali texts: 'By action, Bhikkhus, I mean volition. It is through having willed that a man does something in the form of deed, speech or thought.'

The nama-rupa process, which occurs according to the law of paticcasamuppada (Pratītya-Samutpāda), is like a tree; See 2.3. PATICCASAMUPPADA. The nama-rupa process, which occurs due to the niyama(s) other than kamma niyama, is outside the law of paticcasamuppada but not unrelated.

Naked Kassapa

The ascetic Acelakassapa put forward four theories of origination of suffering and wanted to know Buddha’s answer to them. [Dependent Origination and the Buddhist Theory of Relativity (Kottegoda S. Warnasuriya (page 154)]
"'He who performs the act also experiences [the result]' — what you, Kassapa, first called 'suffering caused by oneself' — this amounts to the Eternalist[3] theory. [Acela Sutta: Naked Kassapa]

An action was done by a doer, not someone else. However, the doer and the action (kamma) can exist only during the action is being done, not before or after. The doer happens to exist because of doing. The doer and doing exists at the same time. Action and doer don't exist outside doing or before or after the action is done.
Saying there is no doer falls into ahetukavada and probably uccedavada, too, as 'no doer' means 'nobody is responsible' to take the consequences. When the action is done, it becomes a seed that grows into a tree (as nama-rupa process) according to the paticcasamuppada law. The fruiting or consequences of volition (kamma/seed) will appear on this tree.

Of Causal Genesis [Mahathera Ledi Sayadaw (contrinues)]

Paticcasamuppada is Causal Genesis or Dependent Origination (Process). The key words are depdendent and process. The process depends on the action done by the doer, which no longer exists by the next stage of the process. For example, a sound comes out after the drummer hit a drum with a drumstick. The birth of the sound is dependent on the hitting process, but the sound itself is independent to be in the law of impermanence—no butterfly-effect here.
That is how things exist, but not "everything exists".

Hey All,
I really want to talk about the Ranked Requirements from Smite 1 and how they are ridiculous to put a plaster on a problem.
Lets get to the point, either the requirement being so high is to address:

1. Bad players
2. Smurfs.

Well, lets address these. I'm really kinda bored of this "Well if you want to play ranked you have to be good or know all the gods" Well these guys should be ranked low, if a system is matching them with half decent players then there is a problem with your ranked system, you need more ranks or a better way of handing MMR. In a competant system, low skilled players should be playing against low skilled players to learn the game and get better. Not making them grind casual as if playing casual is a better experience for new players when they just get smurfed by people on their main accounts who know new players have to queue casual just to be called out for inevitably feeding. Also in a ranked system that actually works, if you are good you should never have to deal with someone who doesn't know the game, If you have a low rank and you are ranked, with someone who doesn't know the game... that is 100% your fault and you should probably also learn the game.
Smurfs are always a problem, making the requirements high is a way to mitigate it, but you are doing so at the cost of new players. Inviting people to play smite is difficult, they want to play with people just as bad as them and getting steamrolled in casual and insulted is just not inviting to new players. You need to address smurfs via a different metric or gate. Other MOBA's don't expect you to go through all these hoops and at the end of the day those who want it will simply look else where and Smite 2 will bleed players.
Lastly: If you say things like "But they instantly end up in gold and ruin the game" then you are addressing an issue with MMR and blaming new players for it. There are a lot of casual players that would main Smite but simply wont because dealing with smurfs... in casual... isn't fun. Period.
I don't know a solution for the smurfs... but I can garentee if you gate keep ranked instead of improving the system... and defending this, people will simply play smite, get a feeling for Moba's and exodus elsewhere... Majority of the people aint going to grind 200 hours of playing rigged games, where high ranked players can play with new players, just to be able to play with people their skill level. It just aint happening to the majority of people that try Smite 2. Learn from other competative games.
Edit: im off to bed, I'll answer peeps tomorrow :). Its okay to downvote me but be nice to people in the comments section :D

This is technically a repost from another community writers that I posted yesterday. I am sharing it because I was impressed with the response I received from the community. I hope y'all will be okay with me sharing it here too and be equally excited.
My brother and I had worked on a document trying to figure out a way to make the fantasy genre of hunters, gates and monsters realistic (Think Solo Leveling). It took three years to put together a world-building document. I'm placing the final results here not as an ad or self-promotion but as a tool. It’s free to use through creative commons so I don't get anything when you use it. The only stipulation we have set is to give credit where credit is due. Other than that, have at it.
I hope any writers who are dealing with writer’s block may find some inspiration through ours work. I personally recommend putting the document through an AI document scanner, so you don't have to meticulously read through 60 pages of in-depth world building. Just input your question and get an answer. I'm eager to see what all of you do with this tool so let me know if this helps.
Here's the link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1mrZqad--fT-o6rOoU4xGDNoIaA0wT5aV/view?usp=sharing