I have superior drummer 3 and I'm working on sampling drum stems for my band's album, and using the tracker feature to detect hits and change them over to midi notes. Everything is working fine, I've gotten the hang of triggering events and rendering down a midi file from the stems. The issue I'm having is that my reaper project has songs with multiple tempo changes and they are mapped by tempo/time signature markers on the grid. I have no problems tracking midi files for songs that are one steady tempo all the way through, but when I come to songs with tempo changes I'll render the midi file and put it on the grid as a midi take where the song begins and the tempo is correct up until the tempo change marker. When the tempo changes the midi file speeds up to almost double speed and is obviously way off from the click and scratch tracks. Raw drum stems have their own takes on their own tracks that have been play rate corrected to 1.000 to account for the tempo change markers. Superior drummer is set to follow host and for some reason the midi file is rendered in the speed at which it was performed so I think the tempo change markers are taking the performance and altering the tempo and length of the file itself. I'm stuck at this point. I have some ideas for a work around but I feel like there's gotta be something simple I'm missing. Surely reaper or Superior Drummer were designed with functions like this in mind. Sorry about the word salad, this problem is really difficult to explain simply. Any ideas?

I have superior drummer 3 and I'm working on sampling drum stems for my band's album, and using the tracker feature to detect hits and change them over to midi notes. Everything is working fine, I've gotten the hang of triggering events and rendering down a midi file from the stems. The issue I'm having is that my reaper project has songs with multiple tempo changes and they are mapped by tempo/time signature markers on the grid. I have no problems tracking midi files for songs that are one steady tempo all the way through, but when I come to songs with tempo changes I'll render the midi file and put it on the grid as a midi take where the song begins and the tempo is correct up until the tempo change marker. When the tempo changes the midi file speeds up to almost double speed and is obviously way off from the click and scratch tracks. Raw drum stems have their own takes on their own tracks that have been play rate corrected to 1.000 to account for the tempo change markers. Superior drummer is set to follow host and for some reason the midi file is rendered in the speed at which it was performed so I think the tempo change markers are taking the performance and altering the tempo and length of the file itself. I'm stuck at this point. I have some ideas for a work around but I feel like there's gotta be something simple I'm missing. Surely reaper or Superior Drummer were designed with functions like this in mind. Sorry about the word salad, this problem is really difficult to explain simply. Any ideas?

-First- -Previous- -Next (on Patreon)-
—————————
My second to last quarter just ended and I'm pretty swamped with final reports right now, but I'm almost through. Not to mention, the next seven weeks are going to be pretty light because of a sudden lack of classes, since I busted my butt finishing up my remaining credits. I've decided to dedicate this time to (among other things) a writing frenzy! I wanna get some serioussss backlogs up because who knows how busy I'm going to be after graduation. (Not to mention, I'm having some troubles getting my VISA renewed, but that's a personal issue).
Anyways, don't wanna bore you with irl stuff. You're here for food and gay furry romance! So as always, I hope you enjoy reading! :D
—————————
Note: This is a Fanfic of the Nature of Predators series by u/Spacepaladin15, that is being reposted from the NatureofPredators sub. Please support the original content.
Thank you to Philodox on discord for proofreading and editing RfD.
Thank you to Pampanope on reddit for the cover art.
—————————
​
Memory Transcript Subject: Sylvan, Venlil Citizen
Date: [Standardized Human Time]: December 13, 2136
​
It wasn’t too long that I was absent from the event. Sure, Kenta and I had run into a few hiccups when trying to load up the cart, but that was to be expected. Just looking at the absolute behemoth of an edible pile that he had somehow been able to put together in such a short amount of time, it was a wonder just how we were able to fit them all on there in the first place. And the promise that there was still more yet to be brought out had left me astonished. If I hadn’t already seen the ravenous vortex of Venlil that had so efficiently done away with the other dishes, I might have actually been worried about leftovers.
The food in question, long tubes made out of some kind of starchy form of strayu and packaged in an even starchier husk, were stacked in circular pyramids atop three large trays. As it turned out, this delicacy was the same “Tamale” recipe that I had heard mentioned the day before, the sheer amount being the product of Kenta’s, Julio’s, and even Jeela’s preparations. Unfortunately, I hadn’t received the full explanation of what they were just yet, but Kenta had thankfully given me at least a quick rundown.
Using the same steaming methods as the gyoza, these tamales had been folded carefully over a mix of fresh, crisp vegetables whose scent floated around each in a rich aura. They were hot out of the steamer, a cloud of gaseous water encircling the air above it in a decadent plume. If I hadn’t known better, with the combined mass of the tamales and the sheer volume of steam they collectively released, it might have made me believe the cart itself to be on fire. But of course, there was no such thing, and the cloud that spread into the sky only served to sweeten the air.
As I rolled out the cart, I looked at one last addition to the ensemble. There in a large bowl was something that Kenta hadn’t mentioned in the slightest when explaining the recipe and reasonings behind the tamales, and I had been so urgent to get these out the door that I’d forgotten to press for more details. It had been left in the refrigerator since the day before, which I had only noticed when doing inventory after the fiasco of event preparations.
‘It completely slipped my mind until now… I’m glad I didn’t forget it. Especially after what that note said.’
When I had found the bowl, a small piece of paper had been taped to it. On which, an alien text had been inscribed that required me to use my visual translator to make any sense of. It had been nothing but obvious that holding up the translator informed me that the language was indeed Terran. But what confused me was that instead of the morphemic script that I had come to slightly recognize from Kenta’s subculture, it instead appeared to be something more alphabetic.
On it, the note simply read: “Make sure to serve this with the tamales, my friend. Don’t forget!”
Additionally, below those words had appeared to be an additional message. That one, however, was partially scribbled out. When I scanned that one as well, the translator had taken a long time to process, and its output remained considerably fractured: “**od l*ck wit* y*u* n*w boyf***nd.”
Having not thought much of the note, I had just barely remembered to retrieve the bowl from the fridge and put it on the card while Kenta was off busy grabbing one last batch of tamales before rushing me out the door. I shook it out of my mind for the time being. After all, right now there were more pressing things to manage.
Wheeling the cart back outside, I was hit with the briefest shortage of breath. It had only been a momentary respite, but shifting from the quiet of the empty diner to the lively atmosphere of a crowded party would never not be a shock. By now, enough people had shown up that the event could already be considered at max capacity. People from all over filled the street, chatting and conversing in a rambunctious, lively gusto.
To see so many people take the time out of their schedules and come down to my family’s diner just because of the promise of our food… It was almost overwhelming, enough to bring a brief tear to the eye reminiscent of my reaction to that very first wave of people Ginro had brought soon after I first hired Kenta. I took a moment just to bask in it. A feeling I had all but begun to grow almost too accustomed to. A feeling of success, and of pride. And as I once again continued pushing the cart past the crowds of chatty party attendees, along with the piles of wool that it entailed, that feeling continued to pour into me. It was all almost too much to hear at once.
“Hey Sylvan! Great party!” said one voice to my left.
“Amazing food as always, Lackadaisy guy! I can’t get enough of these little strayu things in the salad!” piped another to my right.
“Ooooo! What are those things?” asked one more as I passed by them, who excitedly eyed up the stack of tamales I was delivering.
I laughed along and chatted with people on my way to one of the tables, chuckling at their jokes and accepting their praise on behalf of both myself and the mysterious ‘Kahnta.’ With each pleased guest and hungry gaze, I couldn’t help but feel myself bloom in sheer joy at the tidal wave of enthusiastic complements.
That was… until one otherwise innocent comment sounded from behind me.
“So you’re telling me this was all made by one chef?” they asked one of their friends, not intending me to hear as they talked with their mouth half stuffed with food. Looking closer, I could see that they were two Gojids chatting with one another. “Better enjoy it now, I guess. Not gonna be long before some fancy place in the Capital comes and recruits them. Honestly, if the owner of this place wants to have any hope of holding on to them, he better marry them or something.”
The partygoer’s friend laughed, “Well if he doesn’t, then I will! Can you imagine eating something like this every day?”
I couldn’t help but bloom even more overhearing this. But this was a different kind of feeling. Not the gentle warmth of normal delight, but instead the torrid heat of surging emotions. And as I began nonchalantly transferring the steaming tamales to one of the tables, these emotions steamed to the surface of my mind as well.
It was a mix of things that fueled my silent reaction. At first, the implication of asking Kenta into matehood was… well it was certainly something. I was sure the two Gojids were simply making innocent remarks, assuming that the lie about my precious chef being another, completely ordinary Venlil was correct, not realizing in the slightest just how much the implication left me flummoxed. And in normal circumstances, it would have been just that, a simple perk of the ears and a brief daydream of something so far away from me. But after yesterday, things had changed.
The previous day had been eventful, to say the least. I had eaten some amazing pastries and listened to an even more amazing alien melody. Only for it all to come crashing down when my idiotic brain forgot to turn back on the translator before pouring out my entire menagerie of pent up emotions before Kenta. My one chance to seize an opportunity at the height of a courageous high, only to tumble and fall flat during the execution. Even worse, I couldn’t muster the bravery to say the same thing even one more time.
I had completely blown it. And needless to say, I wasn’t exactly keen on remembering my mistakes from that previous day, especially during such a pivotal event. The only mediocre condolence I could take from the whole ordeal being the opportunity of waking up next to Kenta that same day. But even that was cut much too short by the mad rush to get preparation ready for the event.
‘I can still remember how warm he felt… And how peaceful he looked when his eyes were closed…’ I thought to myself in deep reminiscence.
“Hey there Sylvan!”
‘I can’t get it out of my head…! Ugh! I wish it wasn’t just a one time thing…’
“Sylvan?”
‘If we really were together romantically, then maybe I could see that every day… But that’s not–’
“Sylvan!!”
The moment my attention was pulled away from my internal thoughts, I audibly bleated out a high pitched noise of surprise, “Eeep!”
My ears jutted up and my tail straightened like a steel beam. My attention shifted over to my side, where I soon realized Fehnel now stood. She had her paws held firmly on her hips, with a head tilted to the side in a half puzzled, half amused demeanor. Then, when I realized I had been staring a little too long without saying anything, I quickly turned my attention back to the table.
“Oh hey Fehnel!” I stuttered out. “Didn’t see you there!”
“Sorry if I sneaked up on ya, hun,” Fehnel replied with a single wag of the tail. “Got somethin’ on the mind, I’m assumin’?”
The image of Kenta and I huddled together on my couch flashed through my mind once more, before I quickly shook it away. “Uhhhh… Nope! I’m just really focussing here on getting these tamales out.”
“‘Tamales,’ huh?” Fehnel chuckled. “Well between this and that ‘gee-yo-za’ stuff, I think I’m startin’ to give up on predictin’ what crazy name Kahnta’ll come up with next.”
“Yeah it’s pretty… uh–” I coughed awkwardly, clearing something nonexistent out of my throat. “It’s pretty creative.”
“You can say that again. By this point, they’re startin’ to sound almost alien!” Fehnel laughed again, and I cringed as the irony fell over deaf ears. “But hey, who am I to judge! I mean, to me all the stuff on this planet is alien, so what’s another ‘Tamale’ added to the pile, yeah?”
I had to stop my ears and head from shrinking too far towards the ground.
“Anyways, I’m assumin’ these are the actual foods I requested Kahnta to create, right?” Fehnel continued to ask.
“Uh– Y-yeah, yes they ar–” I tried to say before one of Fehnel’s paws suddenly reached out and grabbed my wrist.
“Great!” she beamed, before dragging me away into one of the many chatty piles of fluffy wool that constituted our event.
It didn’t take more than a few rushed steps before I was suddenly pulled in front of another Yotul and Venlil, who I did well to recognize immediately. It seemed as though Kadew and Vuilen had arrived, the former of which looking just about as nervous as I had expected. Vuilen, on the other paw, was anything but. Her tail was wagging furiously, almost impossibly giddy with enthusiasm as her ears shifted around a swivel, likely allowing every new smell and sound to pull her attention to and fro.
Fehnel dragged me forward and plopped me down right in front of the two, before saying, “Tell them what you just told me.”
Vuilen leaned forward, bestowing me her full attention, while Kadew remained stationary, only doing as much as to straighten a single, skeptical ear.
“W-well, uh…” I stumbled, before quickly getting my act together. “Among a number of new strayu recipes, the main entree for today’s event is called ‘Tamales.’”
“Oooo!” Vuilen beamed. “What’s that, Lackadaisy guy? It sounds awesome!”
“According to Kahnta, it’s a mix of vegetables folded in a spongy strayu wrap and steamed inside a starchy husk. And…” I tilted my ears towards Kadew, “It’s supposedly a specialty that is designed to be eaten during times of celebration with family. Regardless of whether they be by blood, or found.”
Kadew huffed a short breath, before folding her arms. But before she got the chance to speak, Vuilen’s enthused voice overtook it. The black and white wooled Venlil leaned into her smaller Yotul partner and pulled them into a strong hug.
“Hear that, Dew? It’s like this food was MADE for your Running Day!” Vuilen piped, bouncing up and down like a cub and bringing the now deeply blooming Kadew along for the ride. “Well… I guess it literally was, but you know what I mean! Either way, there’s like a million new kinds of strayu foods here! Can you believe that? I think I even saw some sylvanas over on that table there! Can you even begin to wonder what they taste like? Oh my Sol, I’m so excited!”
Kadew, whose previously unimpressed countenance now had more steam coming out of her ears than the tamales off in the distance, stuttered out her response. “Uh– Uhmm– That’s… that’s great…”
“I know right!” Vuilen squealed. “This is going to be the BEST Running Day ever! I’m so happy for you!”
I couldn’t help but giggle out in response to this, something which Fehnel had long since been doing on her own volition. Unfortunately for Kadew, this did nothing to ease the sheer amount of embarrassment already flying around her dazed face.
“Of course, all guests are free to eat their fill, especially those invited by the Claw’s Lady herself,” I said, before gesturing a paw towards Fehnel. “All of it has been covered in advance by our generous sponsor.”
Vuilen retreated from her hug just as quickly as it had started, twisting her attention back towards Fehnel and I. “Really? I still can’t believe you’re just giving away all this for free!”
She walked towards the two of us, leaving a still dazed Kadew behind her, before rushing to give Fehnel herself another brief hug. “Thank you so much again for organizing something like this, ma’am.”
Fehnel returned the embrace, having nothing but pure pride and joy radiate through her voice. “Of course, hun. I hope you and my daughter enjoy your date.”
“Oh we will!” Vuilen replied quickly, pulling back once again. Just as fast, she began making a beeline for the buffet tables, almost disappearing into the crowd of fellow Venlil fluff before her voice was heard once more. “I’ll be back in a jiffy, Dew! I just gotta try some of this stuff before it’s all gone!”
Before she was out of range, I twisted around, raised a paw up to my mouth, and stood up high to help carry my voice after her. “Don’t forget to save room for dessert!”
Turning back, I joined Fehnel once again in her chuckling. It didn’t take long for Fehnel to comment on the situation now that Vuilen was out of earshot.
She leaned over and gently nudged me in the leg with her tail. “She’s a riot, ain’t she? Does my daughter know how to pick em’, or what?”
“Oh yeah, I’ve seen them together in the diner all the time. Honestly, I’ve been wondering how long it was going to take to knit that scarf,” I commented, referencing one of the more common and romantic Venlil courtship rituals.
“Guys I can HEAR YOU!” Kadew yelped, now seemingly freed of her hug-induced daze.
“Oh hun don’t you worry yourself about us,” Fehnel replied, a slight hum to her voice. “Us adults can’t help but watch the young love bloom.”
“That guy’s barely older than I am!” Kadew shot back, raising a finger to point at me.
I raised two paws in defence, much too similar to the way Kenta does when he’s been caught teasing me. “Hey, doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate it when I see it. You’re doing great, by the way.”
The teasing, however, had been lost on her. I had meant it in good will, but my words had only served to aggravate Kadew, and she huffed out an annoyed breath. Then, she started stomping rapidly in place, her trained legs moving in a blur like overclocked turbines. From even the briefest glance, I could tell that something had been pulling away at her tail, and our comments were doing it no favours.
“Uhh… are you alright?” I asked tentatively.
“ARGH!” she groaned back. “No! No, I am very much NOT alright! Running Day’s here already, I feel like a pile of speh, my fur’s a mess, and I’m FREAKING THE BRAHK OUT!!”
‘Quite the vocabulary on this one, apparently,’ I judged silently, wondering how my mother would have reacted to hearing me talk like that.
“Honey, Vuilen’s not gonna care about any of that silly stuff,” Fehnel said jovially. “Why, I remember bein’ covered in dried mud the first time I went on a date with your father. We went down to the creek together and took turns tossing water at each other. Then, we went down to the local actin’ house and watched a show. But even after all of that, I still had a bit of dried mud crusted on my fur, but your father didn’t mind. Said it gave me ‘character,’ of all the silly things.”
“Isn’t dried mud just dirt?” I asked.
“Naw, see, dirt is sand, silt, and clay, but it only becomes mud when it has a higher content of clay.”
“So then what happens when dirt gets wet but doesn’t have a lot of clay?”
“Wet dirt.”
“Ah.”
“WHAT ARE YOU BRAHKING TALKING ABOUT!?” Kadew squealed in a panic, her stomping had not ceased in the slightest. She threw her paws up and pulled her ears down over her eyes. “Dirt and mud! That’s all that we Yotul talk about apparently! And trains! Can’t forget the brahking trains! Stars above, that’s all people ever say!”
“Trains are cool,” I said indifferently.
“I don’t care!” she huffed, before turning to Fehnel. “Mom. What if Vuilen comes back and sees you talking about dirt? She’ll just see that it’s the only thing a primitive uplift is capable of understanding! Do you really want to prove her right?”
Fehnel looked shocked, but replied nonetheless. “Has… she said something like that before?”
“Well…! No…! But…” Kadew stomped again. “She might, okay!? Especially if she sees you actively talking about it!”
“To be fair, I asked,” I replied. “Besides, Vuilen seems like a smart girl. She wouldn’t make a rash assumption about the Yotul based off some random remark. Relationships are stronger than that. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”
“What do you know about it!?” Kadew shot back, releasing her ears and letting them perk up to max height. “Unless I missed something, I don’t see you dating any other Venlil in that restaurant of yours! How do you know if any of this is fine!?”
Fehnel’s voice soured immediately. “Kadew! That is no way to talk to our new business partner! He was just tryin’ to help! Apologize this instant!”
Realizing something had shifted without my notice, I tried to mellow my voice in an attempt to calm the situation down. “Oh, that won’t be necessar–”
“No,” Fehnel interrupted. “I refuse to let my daughter be rude to anyone. We might not have much, but we at least have manners.” She turned her attention back to her daughter. “Kadew, if you have a problem, then I want you to tell me about it. If there’s somethin’ we can do to help, then–”
“No no, it’s not…” Kadew replied, bringing two fingers up to pinch the bridge of her snout. “It’s not that…”
“It’s not what?” Fehnel tried to guess. “It’s with Vuilen, isn’t it? You’re afraid she’ll not be able to appreciate the Runnin’ Day? Listen, I know this isn’t Leirn, but Sylvan and I are kickin’ our hardest to make it special for you regardless. Sure, it’s not the most traditional, but I’m sure Vuilen won’t mind! I understand that livin’ on a new planet is taxin’, the gravity here especially, but as foreigners it’s our job to show these nice people where we come from. We’re Yotul, and nothin’ will change that!”
“Mom…” Kadew grunted back, before taking a deep breath.
Before she could speak, Fehnel continued with a proud wag to her tail. “Do you remember what a Runnin’ Day is all about, Kadew? It’s about all the cubs that came of age that year comin’ together and sayin’ that they’ll be fine by themselves. But it’s also about family. It’s about knowin’ that no matter where you run off to, I’ll be there to support you. But you’re makin’ it real hard to do that every time you don’t tell me what the matter is! And if you don’t, how can I make this Runnin’ Day the best it can–”
“But it’s not a Running Day, is it!” Kadew yelled, instantly shutting Fehnel up.
Her mother stared forward blankly, stumbling over a few unclear words. “Wh-what do you…”
“It’s not a Running Day!” Kadew repeated. “It’s not! I mean look around you!” She lifted her arms up dramatically, motioning towards the crowds of unaware Venlil around us. “We’re the only Yotul here! We’re the only two people that even know what a Running Day is, and I’m pretty sure we’re the only people that care!”
I tried to speak, “Umm… I know what a Running Day i–” but the look of animosity Kadew immediately shot my way gave me Jeela flashbacks, and I shut up just as quick.
“Kadew… Hun, that’s not true,” Fehnel tried to defend. “I’m sure they’d be willing to open their minds if we just–”
“What? Tell them all about how great it is to come from an Uplift planet? Talk about brahking DIRT some more!? Careful there Mom, don’t want to spoil their meal!” Kadew continued her berating. “Because you and I both know that the only reason anyone even showed up to this thing is because of that guy’s food!” Another finger was shot out in my direction. “Even you know there’s nothing special about your stupid Uplift culture! There’s nothing here even remotely related to the Yotul! It’s all just Venlil decorations and Venlil food, for our solely Venlil guests! And look!!” She pointed directly at the statue Jeela had placed as the centerpiece. “They have a statue of a Venlil as the center of everything! It’s the star attraction, not us! They couldn’t give a damn about me or Running Day or our culture or… or anything!”
Fehnel appeared to be on the verge of tears.
“And now I’ve got to find some kind of excuse for all this!” Kadew added. “It’s bad enough I had to drag Vuilen into pretending to care about the Yotul. But now the entire town is a part of it too! They’re laughing at us, Mom! Just like at school! Just like everywhere else I go! They’re laughing at us and you’re proud about it!”
From the verge of tears, Fehnel’s voice had croaked into a soft weep. A glimmering stream of water had begun to crawl down the ridge of her rust-coloured face.
“I hate being born a Yotul! I hate this gross, rusty fur! I hate everyone thinking I’m primitive and that I must be in love with trains and steam engines! And I hate you trying to push your culture on me! Cause guess what? I’ve never even seen Leirn! It’s NOT my home and you need to stop pretending it is!”
Fehnel stood simply aghast, the occasional choked-up garble of sounds emerging from her throat. Meanwhile, I stood speechless as well. Obviously, I had accidentally walked in on and been exposed to something that had been going on for quite a while. But even worse, it seems as though I had done nothing but fanned the flame of this long-fueled fire. Instinctively, I began taking a few steps back to give the two their space, which went unnoticed by either party.
Fehnel swallowed, her eyes still welling tears. “I… I…” she tried to say, but no words would form. Instead, she choked on her own voice. And Kadew, who stood waiting for a response, sucked in heavy loads of air in the fleeting hope to catch her breath.
But instead of an answer, all that any of us heard was a scream.
—————————
​
-First- -Previous- -Next (on Patreon)-

-First- -Previous- -Next (on Patreon)-
—————————
My second to last quarter just ended and I'm pretty swamped with final reports right now, but I'm almost through. Not to mention, the next seven weeks are going to be pretty light because of a sudden lack of classes, since I busted my butt finishing up my remaining credits. I've decided to dedicate this time to (among other things) a writing frenzy! I wanna get some serioussss backlogs up because who knows how busy I'm going to be after graduation. (Not to mention, I'm having some troubles getting my VISA renewed, but that's a personal issue).
Anyways, don't wanna bore you with irl stuff. You're here for food and gay furry romance! So as always, I hope you enjoy reading! :D
—————————
Thank you to Philodox on discord for proofreading and editing RfD.
Thank you to Pampanope on reddit for the cover art.
—————————
Memory Transcript Subject: Sylvan, Venlil Citizen
Date: [Standardized Human Time]: December 13, 2136
​
It wasn’t too long that I was absent from the event. Sure, Kenta and I had run into a few hiccups when trying to load up the cart, but that was to be expected. Just looking at the absolute behemoth of an edible pile that he had somehow been able to put together in such a short amount of time, it was a wonder just how we were able to fit them all on there in the first place. And the promise that there was still more yet to be brought out had left me astonished. If I hadn’t already seen the ravenous vortex of Venlil that had so efficiently done away with the other dishes, I might have actually been worried about leftovers.
The food in question, long tubes made out of some kind of starchy form of strayu and packaged in an even starchier husk, were stacked in circular pyramids atop three large trays. As it turned out, this delicacy was the same “Tamale” recipe that I had heard mentioned the day before, the sheer amount being the product of Kenta’s, Julio’s, and even Jeela’s preparations. Unfortunately, I hadn’t received the full explanation of what they were just yet, but Kenta had thankfully given me at least a quick rundown.
Using the same steaming methods as the gyoza, these tamales had been folded carefully over a mix of fresh, crisp vegetables whose scent floated around each in a rich aura. They were hot out of the steamer, a cloud of gaseous water encircling the air above it in a decadent plume. If I hadn’t known better, with the combined mass of the tamales and the sheer volume of steam they collectively released, it might have made me believe the cart itself to be on fire. But of course, there was no such thing, and the cloud that spread into the sky only served to sweeten the air.
As I rolled out the cart, I looked at one last addition to the ensemble. There in a large bowl was something that Kenta hadn’t mentioned in the slightest when explaining the recipe and reasonings behind the tamales, and I had been so urgent to get these out the door that I’d forgotten to press for more details. It had been left in the refrigerator since the day before, which I had only noticed when doing inventory after the fiasco of event preparations.
‘It completely slipped my mind until now… I’m glad I didn’t forget it. Especially after what that note said.’
When I had found the bowl, a small piece of paper had been taped to it. On which, an alien text had been inscribed that required me to use my visual translator to make any sense of. It had been nothing but obvious that holding up the translator informed me that the language was indeed Terran. But what confused me was that instead of the morphemic script that I had come to slightly recognize from Kenta’s subculture, it instead appeared to be something more alphabetic.
On it, the note simply read: “Make sure to serve this with the tamales, my friend. Don’t forget!”
Additionally, below those words had appeared to be an additional message. That one, however, was partially scribbled out. When I scanned that one as well, the translator had taken a long time to process, and its output remained considerably fractured: “**od l*ck wit* y*u* n*w boyf***nd.”
Having not thought much of the note, I had just barely remembered to retrieve the bowl from the fridge and put it on the card while Kenta was off busy grabbing one last batch of tamales before rushing me out the door. I shook it out of my mind for the time being. After all, right now there were more pressing things to manage.
Wheeling the cart back outside, I was hit with the briefest shortage of breath. It had only been a momentary respite, but shifting from the quiet of the empty diner to the lively atmosphere of a crowded party would never not be a shock. By now, enough people had shown up that the event could already be considered at max capacity. People from all over filled the street, chatting and conversing in a rambunctious, lively gusto.
To see so many people take the time out of their schedules and come down to my family’s diner just because of the promise of our food… It was almost overwhelming, enough to bring a brief tear to the eye reminiscent of my reaction to that very first wave of people Ginro had brought soon after I first hired Kenta. I took a moment just to bask in it. A feeling I had all but begun to grow almost too accustomed to. A feeling of success, and of pride. And as I once again continued pushing the cart past the crowds of chatty party attendees, along with the piles of wool that it entailed, that feeling continued to pour into me. It was all almost too much to hear at once.
“Hey Sylvan! Great party!” said one voice to my left.
“Amazing food as always, Lackadaisy guy! I can’t get enough of these little strayu things in the salad!” piped another to my right.
“Ooooo! What are those things?” asked one more as I passed by them, who excitedly eyed up the stack of tamales I was delivering.
I laughed along and chatted with people on my way to one of the tables, chuckling at their jokes and accepting their praise on behalf of both myself and the mysterious ‘Kahnta.’ With each pleased guest and hungry gaze, I couldn’t help but feel myself bloom in sheer joy at the tidal wave of enthusiastic complements.
That was… until one otherwise innocent comment sounded from behind me.
“So you’re telling me this was all made by one chef?” they asked one of their friends, not intending me to hear as they talked with their mouth half stuffed with food. Looking closer, I could see that they were two Gojids chatting with one another. “Better enjoy it now, I guess. Not gonna be long before some fancy place in the Capital comes and recruits them. Honestly, if the owner of this place wants to have any hope of holding on to them, he better marry them or something.”
The partygoer’s friend laughed, “Well if he doesn’t, then I will! Can you imagine eating something like this every day?”
I couldn’t help but bloom even more overhearing this. But this was a different kind of feeling. Not the gentle warmth of normal delight, but instead the torrid heat of surging emotions. And as I began nonchalantly transferring the steaming tamales to one of the tables, these emotions steamed to the surface of my mind as well.
It was a mix of things that fueled my silent reaction. At first, the implication of asking Kenta into matehood was… well it was certainly something. I was sure the two Gojids were simply making innocent remarks, assuming that the lie about my precious chef being another, completely ordinary Venlil was correct, not realizing in the slightest just how much the implication left me flummoxed. And in normal circumstances, it would have been just that, a simple perk of the ears and a brief daydream of something so far away from me. But after yesterday, things had changed.
The previous day had been eventful, to say the least. I had eaten some amazing pastries and listened to an even more amazing alien melody. Only for it all to come crashing down when my idiotic brain forgot to turn back on the translator before pouring out my entire menagerie of pent up emotions before Kenta. My one chance to seize an opportunity at the height of a courageous high, only to tumble and fall flat during the execution. Even worse, I couldn’t muster the bravery to say the same thing even one more time.
I had completely blown it. And needless to say, I wasn’t exactly keen on remembering my mistakes from that previous day, especially during such a pivotal event. The only mediocre condolence I could take from the whole ordeal being the opportunity of waking up next to Kenta that same day. But even that was cut much too short by the mad rush to get preparation ready for the event.
‘I can still remember how warm he felt… And how peaceful he looked when his eyes were closed…’ I thought to myself in deep reminiscence.
“Hey there Sylvan!”
‘I can’t get it out of my head…! Ugh! I wish it wasn’t just a one time thing…’
“Sylvan?”
‘If we really were together romantically, then maybe I could see that every day… But that’s not–’
“Sylvan!!”
The moment my attention was pulled away from my internal thoughts, I audibly bleated out a high pitched noise of surprise, “Eeep!”
My ears jutted up and my tail straightened like a steel beam. My attention shifted over to my side, where I soon realized Fehnel now stood. She had her paws held firmly on her hips, with a head tilted to the side in a half puzzled, half amused demeanor. Then, when I realized I had been staring a little too long without saying anything, I quickly turned my attention back to the table.
“Oh hey Fehnel!” I stuttered out. “Didn’t see you there!”
“Sorry if I sneaked up on ya, hun,” Fehnel replied with a single wag of the tail. “Got somethin’ on the mind, I’m assumin’?”
The image of Kenta and I huddled together on my couch flashed through my mind once more, before I quickly shook it away. “Uhhhh… Nope! I’m just really focussing here on getting these tamales out.”
“‘Tamales,’ huh?” Fehnel chuckled. “Well between this and that ‘gee-yo-za’ stuff, I think I’m startin’ to give up on predictin’ what crazy name Kahnta’ll come up with next.”
“Yeah it’s pretty… uh–” I coughed awkwardly, clearing something nonexistent out of my throat. “It’s pretty creative.”
“You can say that again. By this point, they’re startin’ to sound almost alien!” Fehnel laughed again, and I cringed as the irony fell over deaf ears. “But hey, who am I to judge! I mean, to me all the stuff on this planet is alien, so what’s another ‘Tamale’ added to the pile, yeah?”
I had to stop my ears and head from shrinking too far towards the ground.
“Anyways, I’m assumin’ these are the actual foods I requested Kahnta to create, right?” Fehnel continued to ask.
“Uh– Y-yeah, yes they ar–” I tried to say before one of Fehnel’s paws suddenly reached out and grabbed my wrist.
“Great!” she beamed, before dragging me away into one of the many chatty piles of fluffy wool that constituted our event.
It didn’t take more than a few rushed steps before I was suddenly pulled in front of another Yotul and Venlil, who I did well to recognize immediately. It seemed as though Kadew and Vuilen had arrived, the former of which looking just about as nervous as I had expected. Vuilen, on the other paw, was anything but. Her tail was wagging furiously, almost impossibly giddy with enthusiasm as her ears shifted around a swivel, likely allowing every new smell and sound to pull her attention to and fro.
Fehnel dragged me forward and plopped me down right in front of the two, before saying, “Tell them what you just told me.”
Vuilen leaned forward, bestowing me her full attention, while Kadew remained stationary, only doing as much as to straighten a single, skeptical ear.
“W-well, uh…” I stumbled, before quickly getting my act together. “Among a number of new strayu recipes, the main entree for today’s event is called ‘Tamales.’”
“Oooo!” Vuilen beamed. “What’s that, Lackadaisy guy? It sounds awesome!”
“According to Kahnta, it’s a mix of vegetables folded in a spongy strayu wrap and steamed inside a starchy husk. And…” I tilted my ears towards Kadew, “It’s supposedly a specialty that is designed to be eaten during times of celebration with family. Regardless of whether they be by blood, or found.”
Kadew huffed a short breath, before folding her arms. But before she got the chance to speak, Vuilen’s enthused voice overtook it. The black and white wooled Venlil leaned into her smaller Yotul partner and pulled them into a strong hug.
“Hear that, Dew? It’s like this food was MADE for your Running Day!” Vuilen piped, bouncing up and down like a cub and bringing the now deeply blooming Kadew along for the ride. “Well… I guess it literally was, but you know what I mean! Either way, there’s like a million new kinds of strayu foods here! Can you believe that? I think I even saw some sylvanas over on that table there! Can you even begin to wonder what they taste like? Oh my Sol, I’m so excited!”
Kadew, whose previously unimpressed countenance now had more steam coming out of her ears than the tamales off in the distance, stuttered out her response. “Uh– Uhmm– That’s… that’s great…”
“I know right!” Vuilen squealed. “This is going to be the BEST Running Day ever! I’m so happy for you!”
I couldn’t help but giggle out in response to this, something which Fehnel had long since been doing on her own volition. Unfortunately for Kadew, this did nothing to ease the sheer amount of embarrassment already flying around her dazed face.
“Of course, all guests are free to eat their fill, especially those invited by the Claw’s Lady herself,” I said, before gesturing a paw towards Fehnel. “All of it has been covered in advance by our generous sponsor.”
Vuilen retreated from her hug just as quickly as it had started, twisting her attention back towards Fehnel and I. “Really? I still can’t believe you’re just giving away all this for free!”
She walked towards the two of us, leaving a still dazed Kadew behind her, before rushing to give Fehnel herself another brief hug. “Thank you so much again for organizing something like this, ma’am.”
Fehnel returned the embrace, having nothing but pure pride and joy radiate through her voice. “Of course, hun. I hope you and my daughter enjoy your date.”
“Oh we will!” Vuilen replied quickly, pulling back once again. Just as fast, she began making a beeline for the buffet tables, almost disappearing into the crowd of fellow Venlil fluff before her voice was heard once more. “I’ll be back in a jiffy, Dew! I just gotta try some of this stuff before it’s all gone!”
Before she was out of range, I twisted around, raised a paw up to my mouth, and stood up high to help carry my voice after her. “Don’t forget to save room for dessert!”
Turning back, I joined Fehnel once again in her chuckling. It didn’t take long for Fehnel to comment on the situation now that Vuilen was out of earshot.
She leaned over and gently nudged me in the leg with her tail. “She’s a riot, ain’t she? Does my daughter know how to pick em’, or what?”
“Oh yeah, I’ve seen them together in the diner all the time. Honestly, I’ve been wondering how long it was going to take to knit that scarf,” I commented, referencing one of the more common and romantic Venlil courtship rituals.
“Guys I can HEAR YOU!” Kadew yelped, now seemingly freed of her hug-induced daze.
“Oh hun don’t you worry yourself about us,” Fehnel replied, a slight hum to her voice. “Us adults can’t help but watch the young love bloom.”
“That guy’s barely older than I am!” Kadew shot back, raising a finger to point at me.
I raised two paws in defence, much too similar to the way Kenta does when he’s been caught teasing me. “Hey, doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate it when I see it. You’re doing great, by the way.”
The teasing, however, had been lost on her. I had meant it in good will, but my words had only served to aggravate Kadew, and she huffed out an annoyed breath. Then, she started stomping rapidly in place, her trained legs moving in a blur like overclocked turbines. From even the briefest glance, I could tell that something had been pulling away at her tail, and our comments were doing it no favours.
“Uhh… are you alright?” I asked tentatively.
“ARGH!” she groaned back. “No! No, I am very much NOT alright! Running Day’s here already, I feel like a pile of speh, my fur’s a mess, and I’m FREAKING THE BRAHK OUT!!”
‘Quite the vocabulary on this one, apparently,’ I judged silently, wondering how my mother would have reacted to hearing me talk like that.
“Honey, Vuilen’s not gonna care about any of that silly stuff,” Fehnel said jovially. “Why, I remember bein’ covered in dried mud the first time I went on a date with your father. We went down to the creek together and took turns tossing water at each other. Then, we went down to the local actin’ house and watched a show. But even after all of that, I still had a bit of dried mud crusted on my fur, but your father didn’t mind. Said it gave me ‘character,’ of all the silly things.”
“Isn’t dried mud just dirt?” I asked.
“Naw, see, dirt is sand, silt, and clay, but it only becomes mud when it has a higher content of clay.”
“So then what happens when dirt gets wet but doesn’t have a lot of clay?”
“Wet dirt.”
“Ah.”
“WHAT ARE YOU BRAHKING TALKING ABOUT!?” Kadew squealed in a panic, her stomping had not ceased in the slightest. She threw her paws up and pulled her ears down over her eyes. “Dirt and mud! That’s all that we Yotul talk about apparently! And trains! Can’t forget the brahking trains! Stars above, that’s all people ever say!”
“Trains are cool,” I said indifferently.
“I don’t care!” she huffed, before turning to Fehnel. “Mom. What if Vuilen comes back and sees you talking about dirt? She’ll just see that it’s the only thing a primitive uplift is capable of understanding! Do you really want to prove her right?”
Fehnel looked shocked, but replied nonetheless. “Has… she said something like that before?”
“Well…! No…! But…” Kadew stomped again. “She might, okay!? Especially if she sees you actively talking about it!”
“To be fair, I asked,” I replied. “Besides, Vuilen seems like a smart girl. She wouldn’t make a rash assumption about the Yotul based off some random remark. Relationships are stronger than that. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”
“What do you know about it!?” Kadew shot back, releasing her ears and letting them perk up to max height. “Unless I missed something, I don’t see you dating any other Venlil in that restaurant of yours! How do you know if any of this is fine!?”
Fehnel’s voice soured immediately. “Kadew! That is no way to talk to our new business partner! He was just tryin’ to help! Apologize this instant!”
Realizing something had shifted without my notice, I tried to mellow my voice in an attempt to calm the situation down. “Oh, that won’t be necessar–”
“No,” Fehnel interrupted. “I refuse to let my daughter be rude to anyone. We might not have much, but we at least have manners.” She turned her attention back to her daughter. “Kadew, if you have a problem, then I want you to tell me about it. If there’s somethin’ we can do to help, then–”
“No no, it’s not…” Kadew replied, bringing two fingers up to pinch the bridge of her snout. “It’s not that…”
“It’s not what?” Fehnel tried to guess. “It’s with Vuilen, isn’t it? You’re afraid she’ll not be able to appreciate the Runnin’ Day? Listen, I know this isn’t Leirn, but Sylvan and I are kickin’ our hardest to make it special for you regardless. Sure, it’s not the most traditional, but I’m sure Vuilen won’t mind! I understand that livin’ on a new planet is taxin’, the gravity here especially, but as foreigners it’s our job to show these nice people where we come from. We’re Yotul, and nothin’ will change that!”
“Mom…” Kadew grunted back, before taking a deep breath.
Before she could speak, Fehnel continued with a proud wag to her tail. “Do you remember what a Runnin’ Day is all about, Kadew? It’s about all the cubs that came of age that year comin’ together and sayin’ that they’ll be fine by themselves. But it’s also about family. It’s about knowin’ that no matter where you run off to, I’ll be there to support you. But you’re makin’ it real hard to do that every time you don’t tell me what the matter is! And if you don’t, how can I make this Runnin’ Day the best it can–”
“But it’s not a Running Day, is it!” Kadew yelled, instantly shutting Fehnel up.
Her mother stared forward blankly, stumbling over a few unclear words. “Wh-what do you…”
“It’s not a Running Day!” Kadew repeated. “It’s not! I mean look around you!” She lifted her arms up dramatically, motioning towards the crowds of unaware Venlil around us. “We’re the only Yotul here! We’re the only two people that even know what a Running Day is, and I’m pretty sure we’re the only people that care!”
I tried to speak, “Umm… I know what a Running Day i–” but the look of animosity Kadew immediately shot my way gave me Jeela flashbacks, and I shut up just as quick.
“Kadew… Hun, that’s not true,” Fehnel tried to defend. “I’m sure they’d be willing to open their minds if we just–”
“What? Tell them all about how great it is to come from an Uplift planet? Talk about brahking DIRT some more!? Careful there Mom, don’t want to spoil their meal!” Kadew continued her berating. “Because you and I both know that the only reason anyone even showed up to this thing is because of that guy’s food!” Another finger was shot out in my direction. “Even you know there’s nothing special about your stupid Uplift culture! There’s nothing here even remotely related to the Yotul! It’s all just Venlil decorations and Venlil food, for our solely Venlil guests! And look!!” She pointed directly at the statue Jeela had placed as the centerpiece. “They have a statue of a Venlil as the center of everything! It’s the star attraction, not us! They couldn’t give a damn about me or Running Day or our culture or… or anything!”
Fehnel appeared to be on the verge of tears.
“And now I’ve got to find some kind of excuse for all this!” Kadew added. “It’s bad enough I had to drag Vuilen into pretending to care about the Yotul. But now the entire town is a part of it too! They’re laughing at us, Mom! Just like at school! Just like everywhere else I go! They’re laughing at us and you’re proud about it!”
From the verge of tears, Fehnel’s voice had croaked into a soft weep. A glimmering stream of water had begun to crawl down the ridge of her rust-coloured face.
“I hate being born a Yotul! I hate this gross, rusty fur! I hate everyone thinking I’m primitive and that I must be in love with trains and steam engines! And I hate you trying to push your culture on me! Cause guess what? I’ve never even seen Leirn! It’s NOT my home and you need to stop pretending it is!”
Fehnel stood simply aghast, the occasional choked-up garble of sounds emerging from her throat. Meanwhile, I stood speechless as well. Obviously, I had accidentally walked in on and been exposed to something that had been going on for quite a while. But even worse, it seems as though I had done nothing but fanned the flame of this long-fueled fire. Instinctively, I began taking a few steps back to give the two their space, which went unnoticed by either party.
Fehnel swallowed, her eyes still welling tears. “I… I…” she tried to say, but no words would form. Instead, she choked on her own voice. And Kadew, who stood waiting for a response, sucked in heavy loads of air in the fleeting hope to catch her breath.
But instead of an answer, all that any of us heard was a scream.
—————————
​
-First- -Previous- -Next (on Patreon)-

Live Music

• Yael & Gabriel, Casa Monica Resort & Spa, 11:00 am – 3:00 pm
• Denny Blue, Fish House & Oyster Co., 11:30 am – 3:30 pm
• Lonesome Bert's Thick and Thin String Band, Marina Munch, 12:00 pm – 3:00 pm
• Trevor Compton, Backyard Island Cafe at Meehan's, 1:00 pm – 5:00 pm
• Vinny Jacobs, The Cellar Upstairs Wine Bar & Restaurant, 1:00 pm – 4:00 pm
• Space Heaters, Pierre's Pub, 1:00 pm – 5:00 pm
• Palmetto Pickers, DJ's Clam Shack, 1:00 pm – 4:00 pm
• Jolie, Bin 39 Wine Bar, 1:00 pm – 4:00 pm
• Seedfromatree, Jimmy Hula's, 2:00 pm – 6:00 pm
• SouLo Lyon, Prohibition Kitchen, 2:00 pm – 5:00 pm
• Annie Dukes, Blue Crab Festival 2024, 2:15 pm – 3:45 pm
• Ian Opalinski, Ann O'Malley's Deli and Pub, 3:00 pm – 6:00 am
• Ashley Estevez, Conch House Marina Resort, 3:00 pm – 7:00 pm
• Wayne Lake, Casa de Vino 57, 3:30 pm – 6:30 pm
• Dewey Via Band, Dog Rose Brewing Co., 3:30 pm – 6:30 pm
• Josh Ford, Taco Libre #3 - St. Augustine, 5:00 pm – 6:30 pm
• Crawford Boyd's Acoustic Anomaly, Tradewinds Lounge, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• Paper City Hustlers, Blue Crab Festival 2024, 5:15 pm – 6:45 pm
• Damon Slaughter, O.C. White's Seafood, 5:30 pm – 8:30 pm
• Chase Fouraker, Pierre's Pub, 6:00 pm – 10:00 pm
• Jimmy Bragg, Meehan's Irish Pub & Seafood House, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Side 3 Band, Borrillo's Pizzeria & Beer Garden, 6:00 pm – 8:30 pm
• Yael & Gabriel, Limelight Theatre, Inc., 7:00 pm – 9:00 pm

Heroes & Patriots Celebration

• The Peña-Peck House hosts special events on Memorial Day Weekend, at 2:00 p.m. on Saturday, the 25th, and from 12:00 to 4:30 p.m. on Sunday, the 26th.
• On Saturday, May 25, at 2:00 p.m., Alison Simpson, The Florida National Guard Command Historian will present a talk titled "Men and Women Veterans Buried in the St. Augustine National Cemetery."
• On Sunday, May 26, from noon to 4:30 p.m., Artisans in the Garden presents local artists and their work. The featured artists are Pam Consolie, Patricia Brown, Paulo Jimenez, Robyn Freedman, and Rosamond Parrish.
• The Artisan Gift Shop, at the Peña-Peck House, will be open from noon to 4:30 p.m. on both days, and tours of the historic Peña-Peck are available at noon, 1:00, 2:00, and 3:00 p.m.
• Admission: Free
• When: The Peña-Peck House will be open from noon to 4:30 p.m. on both days. Alison Simpson's presentation is at 2:00 p.m. on Saturday.
• Where: The Peña-Peck House, 143 St. George Street, St. Augustine, Florida 32084

Super Sunday Improv Mixer

• At the Super Sunday Improv Mixer, grown-ups are invited to a cooperative, facilitated play experience. Using improv games and exercises, an improv instructor leads attendees through a play experience where everyone wins. This is an all-play zone where all are welcome - no experience is necessary.
• Registration: $11.00 in advance, $15.00 at the door. To register in advance, go here.
• When: 5:00 - 7:00 p.m. Sunday, May 26, 2024
• Where: Third Space Improv is located at 200 Malaga Street #7 in St. Augustine. Free parking is available.

Yoga on the Lawn at Ximenez-Fatio House Museum

• Every Sunday and Wednesday
• Ximenez-Fatio House Museum20 Aviles St.St. Augustine, FL 32084
• Admission $15
• Enjoy yoga on the lawn at the historic Ximenez-Fatio House Museum. This one-hour vinyasa flow is perfect for all levels. Bring a beach towel or mat and water. Free parking behind the museum is available, but limited. Access the parking lot from Cadiz Street. Instructor will contact you by phone if class is canceled due to weather. Practice gets underway at 8 a.m. and lasts approximately one hour. Cost is $15 and registration is required.

Paella Sunday at Pesca by Michael

• Every Sunday
• Pesca By Michael's117 Vilano Rd.St. Augustine, FL 32084
• Admission $35 per personEvery Sunday
• Enjoy Paella Sunday on the Porch of Pesca by Michael's on Vilano Beach from 3-5 p.m. Tickets are $35 and feature Paella changes weekly, A favorite is is Garden Paella with Chicken Skewers and Shrimp with chorizo on the side (to accommodate all dietary restrictions). Salad, Bread, and one complimentary glass of Sangria or Wine are included. Purchase Tickets online at the door.

I am unable to post the sources because they are getting flagged as spam since they are all similar in name. So please visit this site for the list.
Written out urls here tinyurl.com/yjkw32kd

For future events please visit the Discord.

https://discord.gg/NG4eZSWAgR

Live Music

• Yael & Gabriel, Casa Monica Resort & Spa, 11:00 am – 3:00 pm
• Denny Blue, Fish House & Oyster Co., 11:30 am – 3:30 pm
• Lonesome Bert's Thick and Thin String Band, Marina Munch, 12:00 pm – 3:00 pm
• Trevor Compton, Backyard Island Cafe at Meehan's, 1:00 pm – 5:00 pm
• Vinny Jacobs, The Cellar Upstairs Wine Bar & Restaurant, 1:00 pm – 4:00 pm
• Space Heaters, Pierre's Pub, 1:00 pm – 5:00 pm
• Palmetto Pickers, DJ's Clam Shack, 1:00 pm – 4:00 pm
• Jolie, Bin 39 Wine Bar, 1:00 pm – 4:00 pm
• Seedfromatree, Jimmy Hula's, 2:00 pm – 6:00 pm
• SouLo Lyon, Prohibition Kitchen, 2:00 pm – 5:00 pm
• Annie Dukes, Blue Crab Festival 2024, 2:15 pm – 3:45 pm
• Ian Opalinski, Ann O'Malley's Deli and Pub, 3:00 pm – 6:00 am
• Ashley Estevez, Conch House Marina Resort, 3:00 pm – 7:00 pm
• Wayne Lake, Casa de Vino 57, 3:30 pm – 6:30 pm
• Dewey Via Band, Dog Rose Brewing Co., 3:30 pm – 6:30 pm
• Josh Ford, Taco Libre #3 - St. Augustine, 5:00 pm – 6:30 pm
• Crawford Boyd's Acoustic Anomaly, Tradewinds Lounge, 5:00 pm – 8:00 pm
• Paper City Hustlers, Blue Crab Festival 2024, 5:15 pm – 6:45 pm
• Damon Slaughter, O.C. White's Seafood, 5:30 pm – 8:30 pm
• Chase Fouraker, Pierre's Pub, 6:00 pm – 10:00 pm
• Jimmy Bragg, Meehan's Irish Pub & Seafood House, 6:00 pm – 9:00 pm
• Side 3 Band, Borrillo's Pizzeria & Beer Garden, 6:00 pm – 8:30 pm
• Yael & Gabriel, Limelight Theatre, Inc., 7:00 pm – 9:00 pm

Heroes & Patriots Celebration

• The Peña-Peck House hosts special events on Memorial Day Weekend, at 2:00 p.m. on Saturday, the 25th, and from 12:00 to 4:30 p.m. on Sunday, the 26th.
• On Saturday, May 25, at 2:00 p.m., Alison Simpson, The Florida National Guard Command Historian will present a talk titled "Men and Women Veterans Buried in the St. Augustine National Cemetery."
• On Sunday, May 26, from noon to 4:30 p.m., Artisans in the Garden presents local artists and their work. The featured artists are Pam Consolie, Patricia Brown, Paulo Jimenez, Robyn Freedman, and Rosamond Parrish.
• The Artisan Gift Shop, at the Peña-Peck House, will be open from noon to 4:30 p.m. on both days, and tours of the historic Peña-Peck are available at noon, 1:00, 2:00, and 3:00 p.m.
• Admission: Free
• When: The Peña-Peck House will be open from noon to 4:30 p.m. on both days. Alison Simpson's presentation is at 2:00 p.m. on Saturday.
• Where: The Peña-Peck House, 143 St. George Street, St. Augustine, Florida 32084

Super Sunday Improv Mixer

• At the Super Sunday Improv Mixer, grown-ups are invited to a cooperative, facilitated play experience. Using improv games and exercises, an improv instructor leads attendees through a play experience where everyone wins. This is an all-play zone where all are welcome - no experience is necessary.
• Registration: $11.00 in advance, $15.00 at the door. To register in advance, go here.
• When: 5:00 - 7:00 p.m. Sunday, May 26, 2024
• Where: Third Space Improv is located at 200 Malaga Street #7 in St. Augustine. Free parking is available.

Yoga on the Lawn at Ximenez-Fatio House Museum

• Every Sunday and Wednesday
• Ximenez-Fatio House Museum20 Aviles St.St. Augustine, FL 32084
• Admission $15
• Enjoy yoga on the lawn at the historic Ximenez-Fatio House Museum. This one-hour vinyasa flow is perfect for all levels. Bring a beach towel or mat and water. Free parking behind the museum is available, but limited. Access the parking lot from Cadiz Street. Instructor will contact you by phone if class is canceled due to weather. Practice gets underway at 8 a.m. and lasts approximately one hour. Cost is $15 and registration is required.

Paella Sunday at Pesca by Michael

• Every Sunday
• Pesca By Michael's117 Vilano Rd.St. Augustine, FL 32084
• Admission $35 per personEvery Sunday
• Enjoy Paella Sunday on the Porch of Pesca by Michael's on Vilano Beach from 3-5 p.m. Tickets are $35 and feature Paella changes weekly, A favorite is is Garden Paella with Chicken Skewers and Shrimp with chorizo on the side (to accommodate all dietary restrictions). Salad, Bread, and one complimentary glass of Sangria or Wine are included. Purchase Tickets online at the door.

I am unable to post the sources because they are getting flagged as spam since they are all similar in name. So please visit this site for the list.
Written out urls here tinyurl.com/yjkw32kd

For future events please visit the Discord.

https://discord.gg/NG4eZSWAgR

[Header("Salto")] public float fuerzaSalto; public float saltosMaximos; public LayerMask capaSuelo; public float velocidadSubida; public float velocidadBajada; private float saltosRestantes; [Header("Salto Doble")] public float fuerzaDobleSalto; public float velocidadSubidaDobleSalto; public float velocidadBajadaDobleSalto; [Header("Dash")] public float fuerzaDash; public float delayDash; private float temporizadorDash; private bool puedeDashearEnAire; [Header("Slide")] [SerializeField] private float velocidadDeslizamiento; public Vector2 tamañoColliderDeslizamiento; public float tiempoDeslizamiento = 0.5f; private float tiempoDeslizamientoContador; private Vector2 tamañoColliderOriginal; private Vector2 offsetColliderOriginal; private bool estaDeslizando = false; [Header("Wall")] [SerializeField] private bool deslizamientoEnPared; [SerializeField] private float velocidadDeslizamientoPared = 2f; [SerializeField] private float tiempoSaltoEnPared = 0.2f; [SerializeField] private float contadorSaltoEnPared; [SerializeField] private float duracionSaltoEnPared = 0.4f; [SerializeField] private Vector2 potenciaSaltoEnPared = new Vector2(8f, 16f); [SerializeField] private Transform comprobadorPared; [SerializeField] private LayerMask capaPared; private bool saltoEnPared; private float direccionSaltoEnPared; private void Start() { playerRB = GetComponent(); anim = GetComponent(); boxCollider = GetComponent(); tamañoColliderOriginal = boxCollider.size; offsetColliderOriginal = boxCollider.offset; saltosRestantes = saltosMaximos; } void Update() { ProcesarMovimiento(); ProcesarSalto(); ProcesarDash(); ProcesarSlide(); ProcesarWall(); } private enum PlayerState { Idle, Running, Jumping, DoubleJumping, Dashing, Slide, Wall } bool EstaEnSuelo() { float distanciaRaycast = 0.1f; Vector2 origenRaycast = new Vector2(boxCollider.bounds.center.x, boxCollider.bounds.min.y); RaycastHit2D hit = Physics2D.Raycast(origenRaycast, Vector2.down, distanciaRaycast, capaSuelo); return hit.collider != null; } bool EstaTocandoPared() { float distanciaRaycast = 0.1f; Vector2 origenRaycast = boxCollider.bounds.center; Vector2 direccionRaycast = mirandoDerecha ? Vector2.right : Vector2.left; RaycastHit2D hit = Physics2D.Raycast(origenRaycast, direccionRaycast, distanciaRaycast, capaPared); Debug.DrawRay(origenRaycast, direccionRaycast * distanciaRaycast, Color.red); return hit.collider != null; } void ProcesarSalto() { if (EstaEnSuelo()) { if (saltosRestantes < saltosMaximos) { saltosRestantes = saltosMaximos; puedeDashearEnAire = true; ChangeState(PlayerState.Idle); } } if (Input.GetKeyDown(KeyCode.Q) && (saltosRestantes > 0 deslizamientoEnPared)) { if (deslizamientoEnPared) { saltosRestantes = saltosMaximos - 1; Vector2 direccionSaltoPared = mirandoDerecha ? new Vector2(-1, 1) : new Vector2(1, 1); playerRB.velocity = Vector2.zero; playerRB.AddForce(new Vector2(direccionSaltoPared.x * potenciaSaltoEnPared.x, direccionSaltoPared.y * potenciaSaltoEnPared.y), ForceMode2D.Impulse); deslizamientoEnPared = false; ChangeState(PlayerState.Jumping); } else { saltosRestantes--; playerRB.velocity = new Vector2(playerRB.velocity.x, 0f); if (saltosRestantes == 0) { playerRB.AddForce(Vector2.up * fuerzaDobleSalto, ForceMode2D.Impulse); ChangeState(PlayerState.DoubleJumping); } else { playerRB.AddForce(Vector2.up * fuerzaSalto, ForceMode2D.Impulse); ChangeState(PlayerState.Jumping); } } } if (playerRB.velocity.y > 0) { if (currentState == PlayerState.Jumping) { playerRB.velocity = new Vector2(playerRB.velocity.x, Mathf.Min(playerRB.velocity.y, velocidadSubida)); } else if (currentState == PlayerState.DoubleJumping) { playerRB.velocity = new Vector2(playerRB.velocity.x, Mathf.Min(playerRB.velocity.y, velocidadSubidaDobleSalto)); } } else if (playerRB.velocity.y < 0) { if (currentState == PlayerState.Jumping currentState == PlayerState.Idle) { playerRB.velocity = new Vector2(playerRB.velocity.x, Mathf.Max(playerRB.velocity.y, -velocidadBajada)); } else if (currentState == PlayerState.DoubleJumping) { playerRB.velocity = new Vector2(playerRB.velocity.x, Mathf.Max(playerRB.velocity.y, -velocidadBajadaDobleSalto)); } } } void ProcesarMovimiento() { if (sePuedeMover) { float inputMovimiento = Input.GetAxis("Horizontal"); playerRB.velocity = new Vector2(inputMovimiento * velocidad, playerRB.velocity.y); GestionarOrientacion(inputMovimiento); if (inputMovimiento != 0 && EstaEnSuelo()) { ChangeState(PlayerState.Running); } else if (EstaEnSuelo()) { ChangeState(PlayerState.Idle); } } } void GestionarOrientacion(float inputMovimiento) { if ((mirandoDerecha && inputMovimiento < 0) (!mirandoDerecha && inputMovimiento > 0)) { mirandoDerecha = !mirandoDerecha; transform.localScale = new Vector2(-transform.localScale.x, transform.localScale.y); } } void ProcesarDash() { temporizadorDash -= Time.deltaTime; if (Input.GetKeyDown(KeyCode.E) && temporizadorDash <= 0f) { if (!EstaEnSuelo() && puedeDashearEnAire) { Vector2 direccionDeDash = mirandoDerecha ? Vector2.right : Vector2.left; playerRB.AddForce(direccionDeDash * fuerzaDash, ForceMode2D.Impulse); temporizadorDash = delayDash; ChangeState(PlayerState.Dashing); puedeDashearEnAire = false; } } } void ProcesarSlide() { if (Input.GetKeyDown(KeyCode.R) && !estaDeslizando) { IniciarDeslizamiento(); } if (estaDeslizando) { tiempoDeslizamientoContador -= Time.deltaTime; if (tiempoDeslizamientoContador <= 0) { DetenerDeslizamiento(); } } } void IniciarDeslizamiento() { estaDeslizando = true; tiempoDeslizamientoContador = tiempoDeslizamiento; boxCollider.size = tamañoColliderDeslizamiento; boxCollider.offset = new Vector2(boxCollider.offset.x, boxCollider.offset.y - (tamañoColliderOriginal.y - tamañoColliderDeslizamiento.y) / 2); velocidad = velocidadDeslizamiento; ChangeState(PlayerState.Slide); } void DetenerDeslizamiento() { estaDeslizando = false; boxCollider.size = tamañoColliderOriginal; boxCollider.offset = offsetColliderOriginal; // Restaurar la velocidad a su valor original después de detener el deslizamiento velocidad = Mathf.Abs(velocidad); } void ProcesarWall() { DeslizamientoEnPared(); SaltoEnPared(); } private bool EstáEnLaPared() { return Physics2D.OverlapCircle(comprobadorPared.position, 0.2f, capaPared); } private void DeslizamientoEnPared() { if (EstáEnLaPared() && !EstaEnSuelo()) { deslizamientoEnPared = true; playerRB.velocity = new Vector2(playerRB.velocity.x, Mathf.Clamp(playerRB.velocity.y, -velocidadDeslizamientoPared, float.MaxValue)); } else { deslizamientoEnPared = false; } } private void SaltoEnPared() { if (deslizamientoEnPared) { saltoEnPared = false; direccionSaltoEnPared = -transform.localScale.x; contadorSaltoEnPared = tiempoSaltoEnPared; CancelInvoke(nameof(DetenerSaltoEnPared)); } else { contadorSaltoEnPared -= Time.deltaTime; } if (Input.GetButtonDown("Jump") && contadorSaltoEnPared > 0f) { saltoEnPared = true; playerRB.velocity = new Vector2(direccionSaltoEnPared * potenciaSaltoEnPared.x, potenciaSaltoEnPared.y); contadorSaltoEnPared = 0f; if (transform.localScale.x != direccionSaltoEnPared) { mirandoDerecha = !mirandoDerecha; Vector3 escalaLocal = transform.localScale; escalaLocal.x *= -1f; transform.localScale = escalaLocal; } Invoke(nameof(DetenerSaltoEnPared), duracionSaltoEnPared); } } private void DetenerSaltoEnPared() { saltoEnPared = false; } private void Voltear() { mirandoDerecha = !mirandoDerecha; Vector3 escalaLocal = transform.localScale; escalaLocal.x *= -1f; transform.localScale = escalaLocal; } public void Rebote(Vector2 puntoGolpe) { playerRB.velocity = new Vector2(-velocidadRebote.x * puntoGolpe.x, velocidadRebote.y); } private void ChangeState(PlayerState newState) { if (newState == currentState) return; currentState = newState; switch (newState) { case PlayerState.Idle: anim.SetTrigger("Idle"); break; case PlayerState.Running: anim.SetTrigger("Run"); break; case PlayerState.Jumping: anim.SetTrigger("Jump"); break; case PlayerState.DoubleJumping: anim.SetTrigger("DoubleJump"); break; case PlayerState.Dashing: anim.SetTrigger("Dash"); break; case PlayerState.Slide: anim.SetTrigger("Slide"); break; case PlayerState.Wall: anim.SetTrigger("Wall"); break; } } 

This thread is for all Public Service Announcements for today's date. If you want to offer a service or an opportunity for an experience or visit, please post in this thread instead of posting separately with the [PSA] tag.
This thread is for people who are offering services. If you are looking for a service, check here first. If you don’t find what you want, you may post a [LF] thread. Make sure to offer something [FT] as payment.
What are services? A PSA is used to announce a service in your town that you would like to invite people to participate in. These things include:

• Special Visitors in your town (eg Celeste),
• Offers to craft in exchange for materials,
• Premiums at Nooks’,
• Villagers giving out recipes,
• Offers to let people use your shops,
• Hosting for fishing or bugs in a different hemisphere. If you are offering an experience, or an opportunity to pay to get an item (eg Saharah, shopping), rather than a trade for items or bells, it belongs in here. Payment for services The general expectation is that people will tip for services. If you want to ask for specific tips, you may. If you want to ask for specific payment, you may. We’ll let the market dictate whether that’s sustainable. NB If you want to do a [GIVEAWAY] for a service like Celeste or villagers giving recipes, you may post a separate thread, but you may not ask for any tips or payment if you do so. All posting guidelines still apply to the Daily PSA Thread. Posts in this thread do not count against the spamming rule. You may have an active PSA in this thread and a second active post outside this thread. NOTE TO HOSTS: WHEN YOU ARE FINISHED HOSTING/NO LONGER AVAILABLE, DO NOT DELETE YOUR COMMENT. Simply edit it to say you have gone offline. Deleting the top comment makes it difficult to figure out what happened and so will invalidate any RMM reviews left for you.

RMM Reviews from this thread may be valid.
NOTE TO HOSTS: WHEN YOU ARE FINISHED HOSTING/NO LONGER AVAILABLE, DO NOT DELETE YOUR COMMENT. Simply edit it to say you have gone offline. Deleting the top comment makes it difficult to figure out what happened and so will invalidate any RMM reviews left for you. If you wish to review someone on /RateMyMayor for participating in this thread, please link to the host's original top comment for the event (click "permalink" under that comment to get the correct URL), to make the trade easier to find in the thread. Failure to do so may result in the review being removed if the trade cannot be found easily.

Title: Simulation Zero.
Theme: Go!Animate Vs The Simulation.
Battle Pass.
Pages.
Page 1.
The Classic Hunter (Skin)
Classic Cowl (Back Bling)
Spear Of The Classic Age (Pickaxe)
Form Modification (Contrail)
Wings Of The Hunter (Glider)
Hunter's Holoarm (Built-In Emote)
Hunter's Glare (Emoticon)
Soaring Hunter (Spray)
Zero Warping (Wrap)
Initiating: Zero Formation (Music Pack/Jam Track)
A Hunter's Shield (Loading Screen)
Page 2.
Simulation Romeo (Skin)
Gated Orb (Back Bling)
Particle Punchers (Pickaxe)
Plummeting Particle (Contrail)
Simulation Skyboard (Glider)
Admin's Hover (Built-In Emote)
Fake Admin (Emoticon)
Admin V Admin (Spray)
Admin Arsenal (Wrap)
Particle Mag (Weapon Mod)
Admin's Soar (Loading Screen)
Page 3.
Powered John (Skin)
Cape Powered By Go!Energy (Back Bling)
Go!Energy Fists (Pickaxe)
Go!Energy (Contrail)
Energized Go!Wings (Glider)
Finger Warm-Up (Emote)
Powered Mask (Emoticon)
Demolition Breakthrough (Spray)
Go!Energy Wave (Wrap)
Go!Energy Muzzle (Weapon Mod)
John's Strike (Loading Screen)
Page 4.
Xavia (Skin)
Xavia's Quickbag (Back Bling)
Xavia's Kinetic Fists (Built-In Pickaxe)
Blue Kinetic Ore (Contrail)
Xavia's Behemoth (Glider)
Alright, Bring Em' (Emote)
Fake Daisy (Emoticon)
Opposite Of A Sweet Daisy (Spray)
Bloody Fists (Wrap)
Ageless Hunt (Music Pack/Jam Track)
Daisy Vs Daisy (Loading Screen)
Page 5.
Ageless Daisy (Skin)
Zaglo Ore (Back Bling)
Kinetic Ore Hammer (PIckaxe)
Red Kinetic Energy (Contrail)
Scouting Falcon (Glider)
Helmet Forged By Zaglo (Built-In Emote)
Refined Kinetic Helmet (Emoticon)
Kinetic Arsenal (Spray)
Red Ore (Wrap)
Zaglo Kinetic Scope (Weapon Mod)
Zaglo Kingdom (Loading Screen)
Page 6.
Ultra-Powered Lunime (Skin)
Lunime's Lives (Back Bling)
The Final Spear (Pickaxe)
Simulation Debris (Contrail)
Wrecked Wings (Glider)
Whatever It Takes, I'll Finish This... (Built-In Emote)
Luni's Final Life (Emoticon)
Evil Emperor (Spray)
Emperor's Energy (Wrap)
Lunime's Final Prophecy (Music Pack/Jam Track)
All Lives Wasted For This (Loading Screen)
Secret Page.
Prowler Xavia (Skin) Defeat Prowler Xavia (1)
Snapshot Mantle (Back Bling) Charge Up Zaglo Kinetic Ore To The Max (1)
Claws Of A Snapshot (Built-In Pickaxe) Deal Damage To Xavia (300)
Glaring Red (Contrail) Collect Blood Samples From Any Eliminated Thing (10)
Snapshot Skysoarer (Glider) Accept A Wastelander Challenge As Prowler Xavia (1)
Prowler Shockwave (Built-In Emote) Emote As Prowler Xavia (1)
Burst Of Shockwave (Emoticon) Use Shockwave Grenades (4)
Prowler Of Soaring (Spray) Travel Distance In The Air After Using Shockwaves (350)
Snapshot Purple (Wrap) Deal Damage With Epic Rarity Weapons (1,000)
Soaring Prowler (Music Pack/Jam Track) Travel Vertically Or In The Air (2,000)
Prowler's Bodies (Loading Screen) Eliminate Opponents As Prowler Xavia (10)
Bonus Pages.
Page 1.
Hunter Mel (Skin)
Calamity Cowl (Back Bling)
Sword Cursed With Calamity (Pickaxe)
Calamity Aura (Contrail)
Calamity Form (Built-In Glider)
A Roar Of A Calamity (Built-In Emote)
Shadow Of The Calamity (Emoticon)
Castle Calamity (Spray)
Purple Calamity (Wrap)
Phase 2 (Calamity Ganon) (Music Pack/Jam Track)
Hunter's Snarl (Loading Screen)
Page 2.
The Classic Hunter (Go!Animate)
Powered John (Go!Animate)
Xavia (Go!Animate)
Ageless Daisy (Go!Animate)
Ultra-Powered Lunime (Go!Animate)
Page 3.
The Classic Hunter (Gacha)
Powered John (Gacha)
Xavia (Gacha)
Ageless Daisy (Gacha)
Ultra-Powered Lunime (Gacha)
Page 4.
The Classic Hunter (Zero Warp)
Powered John (Zero Warp)
Xavia (Zero Warp)
Ageless Daisy (Zero Warp)
Ultra-Powered Lunime (Zero Warp)
POIs: Ultimate Headquarters, Go!Battle Base, Go!City, Hunter's Home, Romeo's Fake Tower, Secreted School, Xanctum Xone, The Zaglo Zitadel, Prowler Peak, Calamity Castle.
NPCs: Spencer Tellin, Tony The Talking Clock, Springtrap, Baldi, Benson, Toodles, Hector Rivera, Cartoon Cat, Nephrite, Monika, Innovator Slone, Puss In Boots, Eren Yeager (Season 4), Mario [Movie], Lacey, Bunbun, Sugar, The Classic Hunter, Powered John.
Bosses: Simulation Romeo, Xavia, Ageless Daisy, Ultra-Powered Lunime, Prowler Xavia, Hunter Mel, Simulation Marvin.
New: Go!Sword, Simulation Sniper, The Classic Hunter's Medallion, Simulation Romeo's Abilities, Simulation Romeo's Medallion, Powered John's Medallion, Xavia's Simulation Sniper, Xavia's Medallion, Ageless Daisy's Shockwave Hammer, Ageless Daisy's Ex-Caliber Rifle, Ageless Daisy's Kinetic Armor, Ageless Daisy's Medallion, Ultra-Powered Lunime's Simulation Ray Gun, Ultra-Powered Lunime's Fists, Ultra-Powered Lunime's Medallion, Prowler Xavia's Claws, Prowler Xavia's Medallion, Hunter Mel's Sword, Hunter Mel's Medallion.
Unvaulted: Simulation Ray Gun, Shockwave Hammer, Ex-Caliber Rifle, Kinetic Ore, Kinetic Blade.
Vaulted: Icon Flashlight, Icon Juice, Cookie Bazooka, Cinnamon Ray Gun, Nathaniel Bandy's Medallion, CourageJD's Gatekeeper Shotgun, CourageJD's Medallion, SergantAJ's Medallion, CaseOh's Suit, CaseOh's Medallion, BigB's Cookie Bazooka, BigB's Enforcer AR, BigB's Medallion, CinnamonToastKen's Cinnamon Ray Gun, CinnamonToastKen's Medallion, SooshiMooshi's Medallion, Ghosttundra's Medallion, Jay's Skateboard, The Stalker's Claws, The Stalker's Medallion, Lacey's Uncle's MK-Alpha AR, Lacey's Uncle's Medallion, Wallten Mistress's Powered Fists, Walten Mistress's Medallion, Andy Flores (Reincarnated)'s Stinger SMG, Andy Flores (Reincarnated)'s Medallion, Flashlight, Skateboard, Stinger SMG.
Live Event: Lunime's Finale.
Season Crew Pack.
Summer Vibe Samka (Skin)
Samka's Selfie (Back Bling)
Simulation Breakout (Pickaxe)
Selfie For Summer! (Loading Screen)

Or for that matter, if any lower ranked player from the host nation of a World Series event won the previous year, would they be a headliner along the big name invitees, or would they still be put among the 8 of the host nation?
To explain better, Van Dongen played in last year’s US Masters. Had he won, would he, as the reigning champ, despite being lower ranked and less popular, be featured among the 8 big names (replacing another player like Littler), or would he, despite being last year’s champ, be featured among the the North American 8?
Also, Littler, despite not being top 8 ranked, is playing in New York. I’m assuming it’s a popularity thing, but why did they choose Dave Chisnall in particular to not be invited? I believe the same thing happened last year, he was ranked higher, but Dimitri was invited.

Hello everyone i have chiv 2 through epic games. When I load up my game and click "invite party members" none of my friends show up under "playing chivalry 2" and my "friends" button is grey. I can't click it even though I have friends online.(i have friends through just in game invites and through epic) I have had this issue for over a year and torn banner wont help me through email. I really enjoy this game and have spent around 100$ on in game currency for skins and seasonal battle passes. If anyone can help I would really appreciate it. i feel like the only option I have left is repurchasing the game on steam and re-buying all my in game cosmetics.
For some further info i can only play with friends if we connect to the same server through the in game server browser. so we cant play 3v3 arena or any of the special events or match make together.

I am not The OOP, OOP is u/Other_Salt3889
My wife is addicted to the gym and it’s ruining our marriage
Originally posted to TrueOffMyChest & survivinginfidelity
BoRU 1
BoRU 2
TRIGGER WARNING: infidelity, physical violence, anger management issues, emotional manipulation
Original Post Feb 1, 2024
My wife is 30 years old and she’s always worked out and been in shape, but lately I feel like it’s becoming excessive.
She used to regularly work out at a gym when she was in college. At some point she stopped going to the gym, I think lately just due to her schedule, and preferred to work out at home or go for runs outside.
About 18 months ago she announced she was going to get back into the habit of going to the gym. She now had a job where she’s able to make more time for it. It started off normal, but slowly became more and more frequent. She signed up for classes on the weekend (both days), she started going to the gym every day, then it became the morning before work and then again later in the evening. Every single day. If she’s stressed, she goes to the gym. Experience some sort of life crisis. She immediately heads to the gym. We have an argument - runs to the gym.
She’s 4 months pregnant right now. I’m kind of surprised we even had time to make a kid. I understand that it’s safe for her to work out, especially since she was already in the habit of doing it before she got pregnant, but the intensity is not slowing down.
If she misses one of her normal gym session she becomes so irritable, like a junkie not getting her fix. It’s just bizarre. Truly a case of too much of a good thing.
Of course she gets upset when I voice that I feel it’s becoming an unhealthy obsession and that I miss spending time with her because she’s there so much. She has all of these friends and this whole circle of people there that she seems to prefer spending time with over me. Why don’t we work out together at the gym? The gym is her time, she says. This isn’t a case of me feeling insecure because she’s in great physical shape and I’m a fat slob. I work out and am in shape - my job really requires me to stay in shape so I can’t let myself go if I want to.
I genuinely feel her gym habits are unhealthy. She’s over exercising, for one. There is such a thing. But worse than that, I feel it’s becoming a way for her to escape everything else in her life. She never actually fixed anything that goes wrong in her life. She just runs off to the gym to get some sort of mood boost and then that’s it. She also never gets anything else done in a practical sense because how can she when she’s at the gym so often? It’s to the point where I have to do every chore and if food is getting made I’m going to have to do it. I don’t expect her to do all of those things, but it should at least be a shared effort.
People we know have even commented about it to me. They’ve said things about how she seems different, how she “sure is at the gym a lot,” and many of her friends and family barely see her anymore. Some have even suggested she’s having an affair with somebody there.
Please tell me that this doesn’t sound normal to you. She insists this is perfectly normal.
Update Feb 11, 2024
I posted not very long ago about my wife’s addiction to the gym. A compulsion, if you will. She spends most of her free time there. She often goes twice a day, and sometimes even 3 times if we have a fight at night and she needs to run off instead of actually talking to me.
She won’t let me go to her gym and she refuses to go to mine. Her gym is her place, my gym is my place, and that’s just the way it has to be according to her. I’d love to have her come along with me. I’ve invited her multiple times.
She’s about 18 weeks pregnant right now. This is our first baby. She worked out like crazy prior to the pregnancy and she continues to just as hard now.
I truly didn’t think she was cheating on me. People suggested it in the last thread and I laughed. You can tell she’s at the gym a lot, she’s in great shape. So she’s obviously going there. I felt really confident about the cheating issue and when I posted 9 days ago I wasn’t even considering cheating.
I’m embarrassed to admit that after reading a lot of the comments on my last post, I thought maybe I was being overly confident about her fidelity. She usually always has her phone on her, but she left it in the kitchen counter and as stupid as I felt, I decided to do a quick swipe through her texts. She had a current text conversation going on with a guy. I recognized the name. The same name of a guy from the gym she mentions a lot. She’s friends with a lot of people there, went to one of their weddings last fall. I wasn’t too terribly concerned until I started reading the texts. Never wanted to know what the guy’s dick looked like, but I know now.
She was only out of the room for literally about a minute or two, so I had to scroll fast. I was furious. I asked her what the fuck that conversation was about. She started yelling at me for looking at her phone. I told her she’s acting so weird and the gym obsession was really bothering me so I just decided to look, and was ashamed that I did, but that’s I thought I’d find nothing all. She said “it’s nothing! It’s nothing!” Didn’t look like nothing to me. She sure seemed pretty interested in this “nothing.” I wanted to know if she’s been fucking him. For how long? She kept saying no. I left the house because I was so furious, but not before I slammed her phone on the ground and shattered it. She was calling me all sorts of names for breaking her phone. She hit me on the back as hard as she could. I left. Went to my brother’s house. My brother and sister in law were shocked, although my sister in law was one of the most vocal ones about my wife’s gym obsession being weird and bringing it up to me constantly.
I went home. She was in bed crying. She obviously couldn’t call me or anyone else for that matter. She was laying it on thick, “I don’t know if you’d ever come home.” Give me a break.
I took her phone to get repaired tonight. She doesn’t deserve it but I still feel like an ass breaking her phone.
I still don’t know how deep it goes. She won’t admit to anything beyond what I saw. Was it sexting (bad enough) or more? I’m convinced it was a lot more, but she refuses to hand over her phone and is now trying to act like I’m this terrible monster who is abusing her because I broke her phone. Not my proudest moment, but I honestly wanted to body slam her after she punched me. I have never and would never actually touch her like that.
Update 2 - My wife admitted to an affair Feb 12, 2024
Not sure if posting something in my profile will be seen by anyone, but I don’t feel like making another update in a subreddit.
Today my wife asked me to stay home from work so we could “talk.” She laid in bed all day yesterday trying to get me to feel sorry for her, but I paid absolutely no attention to her and ended up leaving the house to go to my family’s Super Bowl party. I wasn’t in the mood to go but I wasn’t going to sit at home with her. It really bothered her that I left. She kept texting me things like “Who just leaves like that? When something like this is happening, who is that cold and callous that they just leave to go to a party.”
I stayed home today to talk to her. She was full of tears, she’s “so sorry.”
According to her, she really was going to the gym twice a day because she likes going there, that’s where her friends are, makes her feel good, it’s “fun” for her. She met this guy there and he started flirting with her. Everyone likes him. He’s one of the most popular guys there. I didn’t realize there were popular people at gyms.
She admitted that she flirted back but didn’t mean anything by it. She didn’t reciprocate very much at first, but he gave her “butterflies” and she just found herself flirting back without thinking. She said it felt like when she had a crush on somebody when she was in school when she was younger. They started texting. At first it was just friendly and nothing sexual for several months, but she’d feel giddy every time she got a message from him. She was really attracted to him, but told him that she was married and there could never actually be anything between them.
According to her, he kept flirting with her anyway and said “sure, we won’t cross the line.” Until they did cross the line. She said she had tried to resist it for a while, but then one day they kissed. She admitted to enjoying it but also feeling that it was wrong. She must not have felt that bad because she slept with him for the first time later that night.
She described it like falling in love with somebody for the first time. All she could think about what him. Is she in love with him? She doesn’t know.
Is this baby mine? She thinks so but there’s always a small chance it could be his. He always uses a condom so she doesn’t think it’s his baby but they were sleeping together at the time she got pregnant.
She loves me. She can’t help that there’s just this huge spark between the two of them.
She doesn’t know if she loves him. She doesn’t know if the baby is mine. She doesn’t know why she did this. She doesn’t know what she thinks we should do.
The nail in the coffin is when she said “You would really leave me if it’s not your baby would you?” She had the balls to ask me that. I told her of course I’m leaving her and I wouldn’t raise another man’s child. She seemed shocked. She said “really? With everything we have and all our history, you wouldn’t even consider it?” She can’t be serious. I told her no I would never consider it.
She agreed to get a DNA test. She tearfully agreed, like I’m supposed to feel sorry for her about it?
I don’t know who this woman is. She was crying the whole time, but not tears of an ashamed or sorry person. They were tears for herself and meant to try to make me feel bad. Feel bad for what? That her heart is apparently so torn?
RELEVANT COMMENTS/ADDITIONAL INFO
OOP

She’s ruined my life, but I just feel numb right now. I barely feel anything at the moment.
It would have been bad enough for her to have an affair and cheat on me. But she couldn’t have stopped when she found out she was pregnant? At least I could have walked away if it wasn’t for this pregnancy. Maybe a still can, but I won’t know for sure until I get some test results. She’s almost positive the baby is mine. Im stuck dealing with her forever then. My child will grow up with divorced parents. Their mom will be the gym bike. Maybe she’ll even take off to live near her family and take my kid with her. Oh but then she couldn’t be near the guy who gives her butterflies and fucks her in gym changing rooms. The thrill, the excitement, how can I even blame her?
She’s ruined fatherhood for me, whether this is my kid or not. If by some chance this isn’t my baby and I’m able to completely break free, how will I not think of this one day when I start a family? I was so fucking happy to have this baby with her. I was really excited, even though we hadn’t planned for it right now. We have names picked out. I’ve been there for everything and now she does this to me. Not only me, but this poor kid regardless of who their father is.

~
OOP

She’s saying “I’ll never go back to the gym again. I’ll never talk to him again.” But she can’t say whether she’s in love with him or not? What kind of idiot does she think I am?

TTIsurvivors

She still thinks there is hope to save your relationship? Jesus Christ.

OOP

Yeah, I believe she still thinks there’s a chance I’ll agree to raise another man’s child with her. She doesn’t take me seriously when I say there’s no way I’d do that. She is dependent on me. She probably wouldn’t leave me if I knocked somebody else up and wanted her to play mommy. I know that sounds terrible and it’s nothing I’d ever do but I feel like she’d be mad and she’d go screw somebody else to get back at me but she probably would be too scared to actually leave me. I don’t feel the same way about leaving her. I’m sad to leave her. I don’t want this to be our reality. I can’t even say that I completely hate her yet. But I won’t raise another man’s child. If she feels so strongly about that guy and he’s so wonderful, go get together with him then and leave everyone else alone.

~

She was practically on her knees yesterday saying “I won’t go back to the gym. I won’t ever contact him again.” I feel like that doesn’t really mesh with the fact that she doesn’t even know if she’s in love with him or not. She obviously still has very strong feelings for him, which are probably coming more from between her legs than her actual heart but doesn’t really matter either way to me.
I think despite anything to do with him, she’s dependent on me in a way. For stability, maybe. Just out of comfort, maybe. We’ve been together since she was 20 years old, so I’m just this familiar person I guess. She has her gym friends out here but other than that she has no family or friends out here. She makes pretty good money, but I make more and all of our benefits are through me. Even with her good salary, it would be difficult to survive on her own as a single mom here with all of the daily living expenses, or at least live anywhere near the level she wants to live at.

~

Today is the day she was crying all night about how she’s ruined her life. She seemed genuine, like reality is hitting her, but I didn’t pay any attention to her at all. I just pretended she wasn’t there.
I did ask her if she’ll get blood drawn for a paternity test. I asked her to please not hurt me further by keeping me in limbo about that for months. She said she doesn’t want to.

OOP on if he got a lawyer and if he ever met the AP

I’m meeting with a lawyer next week and will see what they advise.
How can she parade me around when I’ve never been allowed to go to her gym? I’ve met two of the people, a slightly older married couple.
Yes, I met the AP. Last summer he called her because he was drunk at a bar and couldn’t drive home, so he called her to come get him. I didn’t think it was a good idea for her to go pick somebody up late at night, so I went with her.
I want her out of the house but I don’t necessarily want her to fly back home to where she’s from just yet. If this is my kid and she gives birth out here I’ll be in a much better position. If she leaves and goes home to her parents, she could very well be allowed to stay there and that would be considered the baby’s place of residence.
She missed a few days of work, but she has gone to work since all of this happened. She was having a meltdown this morning and I left for work. She told me had to go in late today and when she got there everybody was making her food and tea and stuff. She obviously didn’t tell them what really happened.

How long the affair was happening

She claims they’ve been sleeping together since the summer. Thats just what she claims, of course.

My wife is moving in with her AP, they’re “in love” Feb 22, 2024
My life has been reduced to a trashy daytime talk show.
The woman who was once my wife, who I considered a classy woman, has turned into complete trailer trash.
Today she announced that she’s moving in with her affair partner from the gym. She’s pregnant, might be his kid, might be mine. She’s too embarrassed to go get blood drawn for a paternity test.
She spent about a week trying to get my attention, to get me to talk to her, to get me to beg her to be mine. I didn’t fall for any of it. I’ve largely been ignoring her and when we have to speak I keep it very brief. We’ve been living together this whole time, but I’m in a different room now and functioning separate from her in all ways.
So, her pouting and trying to get me to pay attention to her and give her a gold star for not going to the gym for 5 days in a row didn’t work. Today she texted me to say she is moving in with him.
Somehow I still care about this person. I’ve already met with a lawyer though. I can care about her as a human being and possible mother of my child without being married to her. Still, it stung to hear her say she was going to be with him. I told her it wasn’t a smart move to leave the house. I’ve even told her she should probably meet with a lawyer. She doesn’t care about anything I have to say. I don’t think she needs to move in with anybody. I actually feel bad for her that she can’t just be on her own.
I asked her if he actually knew she was pregnant and wanted to know what story she’s been telling him this whole time. She said he knows and he doesn’t care if it’s my baby, he loves her and wants to be with her. Bizarre. You can’t find anyone else? Somebody who isn’t a married, pregnant woman? Why would you take that on? Doesn’t make sense to me. He’s scum but he’s good looking scum who apparently is gainfully employed and owns his own home, so you can’t tell me that my married, pregnant wife is your only option here. I just can’t imagine being a single guy like that and wanting to put up with this baggage when I could have other options.
And if this really is my baby then what? They’ll live with my wife and this weasel 50% of the time?
I don’t know how my life turned into this mess. And she thinks it’s embarrassing to have to go get blood drawn?!?!
My wife has agreed to a paternity test Feb 29, 2024
My wife moved in with her AP last weekend. She didn’t take very much at all. Most of her stuff is still in our house. I still get the feeling she was just waiting for me to beg her to come home, but I didn’t reach out to her at all after she left.
It was a strange mixture of relief, anger, and sadness. I don’t think I ate at all until last night. Just never felt hungry. Drank a little too much. But I’m fine.
I’m posting this update because I’ve received a ton of messages from people and honestly it’s emotionally draining to respond to each one and to have to type the same stuff out. I just don’t feel like talking about her that much.
So this morning she texted me to say her AP wants to get a DNA test done, so she’s going to do it. Look at that, didn’t matter when I wanted one but now that he has requested it she suddenly thinks it’s a great idea. She asked if I wanted to submit a sample because it’ll be cheaper to have 2 dads tested as part of one package. I don’t even care about the cost at this point, I just want an answer.
I don’t have to see or interact with them at all. I just have to make my own appointment with the lab to get my cheek swabbed. So this Saturday I’m going to do that and we should have the results within a week.
I’ll take what I can get at this point because it’s better than her dragging this out for another 20 weeks.
So that’s it. I’m fine. I’m going to work every day. Trying to function. Just feel stuck in limbo. I miss her. Honestly, I hate that she’s there with him. It makes me sick. Part of me does want to beg her to come home. It’ll be even worse if I find out that it’s my baby and she’s there with him. Unless he drops her at that news. I won’t let myself beg her. I won’t play any of those games with her.
RELEVANT COMMENTS/UPDATES
March 8, 2024
TTIsurvivors

Have you gotten the paternity test results?

OOP

At 11:00 this morning I got the news that I’m the father. I feel incredibly conflicted right now.

jacobe_bryant8

Is she asking to come back home? Or is she still planning on staying with the other guy? Regardless this is a rough situation I’m sorry for you bro.

OOP

We haven’t talked.

jacobe_bryant8

Understandable but I think that you should try and set up a meeting with her somewhere public to discuss the pregnancy and the future in general with her. Whether or not your marriage is going to end the kid is still going to be a big part of your lives so it would be best to see where both of you stand in that regard. Also I recall you saying earlier that you think that your wife would listen to what her affair partner would say to her (or something similar to that) so now that it’s not his kid I would be concerned about him pressuring her into getting a abortion. So I think you really should talk to your wife about your unborn child and whatnot.

OOP

We definitely need to talk, but I got the news in the middle of a work day so I wasn’t in the mood to have a full blown conversation with her. I think I need to sort of wrap my head around the reality of it all before I say too much to her anyway.

And update on my wife’s affair and pregnancy March 15, 2024
My wife has been having an affair with a guy she met at the gym for at least nearly a year. She’s around 22 weeks pregnant right now. She was somewhere around 17 weeks when I discovered she was cheating. She maintained that she was positive I was the father, but then refused to get a paternity test done to ease my mind.
We recently had a paternity test done (at the request of her affair partner) and it proves the baby is mine. It’s been very mixed emotions for me, very up and down. Originally I thought I just wanted to be completely done with her and not have any lifelong ties in the form of a full blown human being we shared, but I was sort of happy or relieved when I got the results. I’d already had it in my mind that I was going to be a father for months before I found out she was cheating. Sometimes I just have moments where I can’t believe this is my life, that this is the situation that my kid will be born into and I hate her for it.
She’s still living with him. All of her belongings are still here in our house. I refuse to do the work of packing everything up for her. She doesn’t seem concerned about taking any her things, beyond the essentials.
After we got the news that I’m the baby’s father, she texted me to say she’s glad I’m the father and that she knows I’ll be a great dad. She was texting me new baby name ideas last night. She’s tried calling but I ignore the calls. I only speak with her via text. This morning she asked if she could come by and get a few things. I told her it was fine, as I’ve been advised by my lawyer to not prevent her entry from the home, but I told her that he better not be with her.
So who shows up with her? The scumbag boyfriend. He walks right on into the house behind her like it’s no big deal. She ran upstairs to get the stuff she wanted and he and I were just left standing there in the living room. He told me it wasn’t her fault that he was there. She told him I didn’t want come but he forced his way along. He wanted to talk to me, supposedly, to tell me he “understand how I must be feeling.” No, you don’t know. He told me he knows I probably don’t believe him, but he genuinely loves her and knew he probably wasn’t the father. He accepts it and then tried to assure me he won’t try to take my place with the baby and hopes we can just get along since we’re both going to be in her life now. He “promises” that she’s fine, he’s looking after her. I told him that I couldn’t for the life of me imagine what he wanted with a pregnant woman who is having another man’s child, that I found it weird. Then I told him if he didn’t get out of my house I’d punch him. I went upstairs and she was trying to find somebody things in the bathroom. I got mad, asked her why she brought him along, and told her I find it really strange that he still wants to be with her now that he knows he has nothing to do with this baby - and that I refuse to let him have anything to do with my child. She said he talked her into coming and she’s sorry and never meant for any of this to happen but she’s in love with him now. He is supposedly what 30 year old her is looking for, not me. She’s setting up a nursery in his house and I can set one up at my house and she has no intention of trying to get full custody or anything like that. She doesn’t want to keep me from being involved in my child’s life. How generous of her.
She went back downstairs and I followed her and he was still standing there in the living room and I just walked up to him and punched him. He stumped back and fall into a table. She yelled “What the fuck?!” and ran over to him. I don’t even care at this point. As if he’s going to call the cops? He deserved it and it wouldn’t have happened had he just left like I told him to.
Several hours later she texted me to say she was sorry about today. He really meant what he said and he’s actually a good guy and he cares about her and he respect me. Wtf? He respects me?! He was screwing my wife in the gym locker room! I was like you can’t be serious. She said “Fine! I’m trying to have a mature conversation about this. I can’t help that we fell in love. Believe it or not, I’m not trying to hurt you and I want everything to be amicable.”
This guy stole my wife and he’s stealing my kid too. Sure I’m the actual father but now they’re setting up a nursery together in his house? I’ve tried to not feel jealous or sad. I’ve tried to maintain the thought that he’s the trash man who picked up my garbage. Sometimes I feel that way, but the truth is that I loved her, and still love her. I don’t want to stay married to her on principle alone, but this is devastating to me.
Another installment of the implosion which is my marriage Apr 10, 2024
My wife? is basically 26 weeks pregnant now.
There actually hasn’t been much drama with her and her AP. I was away for a long weekend last week and it was nice to just get away from home for a while.
Only really annoying thing that’s happened is that I told her I’m being in the delivery room, not him. After everything she’s done, she owes me that. It’s not his baby. He has no right or reason to be there. I will not be the one waiting outside when my kid is being born.
She said yeah she agreed and she never planned to have him in there with her. I asked her if she’d told him that and she said no. I told her to tell him he’ll have no part in it. Well she told him and apparently he didn’t like that and he started trying to convince her why he should be there. Next thing I know she’s telling me that he really wants to be there and she’s the one giving birth so she should be able to say who she wants there and she wants him there. I suppose he’ll start making name suggestions soon and will try to overrule names we’ve had picked out for our future kids for years.
We’ve talked a little bit and she told me I can have our house and the dog in our divorce. I’m requesting that we sell the house and split the profit. I already that written in the paperwork. I’m not buying her out of our house - a house that I’ve made all the payments on anyway. I have a much better credit score than her and less debt. I compromised a lot because she liked this house. I’d rather be able to get my own place based just on what I want and with no reminders of her. And there was already no way she was getting the dog. I already had proof that I “owned” him though so she wouldn’t really stand a chance of having a court award the dog to her. It’s the one thing I told my lawyer I wanted above everything else (not including any custody issues surrounding my actual human child). Honestly, her AP can have her, but he will never ever have my dog. Not to mention my dog is 100 times more loyal than my wife and some might even say better looking too.
So with the idea I won’t be living here in this house for much longer after the baby is born (if everything moves quickly), I decided I will still prepare a nursery here anyway in case anyone wants to try to accuse me of not being invested/prepared for fatherhood. I’m trying to look at the positives. It doesn’t matter what colors she likes or what themes. I can do whatever I want. Honestly, we’ve been together for so long and have lived together for most of our adult lives. It sort of nice not living with somebody but sort of lonely too. I have friends and family, but it’s hard to feel in the mood to go out or hang out with people too often. They always ask me about everything that’s going on and it’s just like I’m tired of that being the topic of conversation.
I got a promotion at work, which financially would have been better had it happened after the divorce, but I’ll take what I can get.
I feel like I’m living in this limbo right now and a lot of what I do is always framed around “how will this affect me in the divorce?”
Admittedly I spy on them on social media sometimes. Guess I’m hoping to see he’s been in a motorcycle accident or something now that the weather is nicer. Hasn’t happened yet, but he’s starting a new company and once that’s up and running I can always get all my friends and family to leave 1 star reviews everywhere. Have to find ways to have a little fun.
Sorry that I don’t respond to a lot of messages or comments. Sometimes I just take big breaks from looking at Reddit since it can be depressing af.
Editing to add something I forgot. She told her family that we’ve split up and that she’s with this other guy now. Her sister reached out to me to say how sorry she was, her sister is a dumbass, that sort of thing. She told me that my wife was complaining about her AP. She the sex is over when he’s done and apparently he’s really selfish with sex. He doesn’t do extra little things for her that she’s used to me doing, like clearing the snow off her car in the morning and heating it up or offering to make her food after a long day. He doesn’t speak her “love language” and he hangs out with his friends too much. This made me so happy to hear. She’s secretly miserable and I find that absolutely delightful.

NEW UPDATE

I’m still alive May 19, 2024
I’m still alive. I’m mainly posting here because several people have reached out to me and were concerned that I’d taken my own life. No, I’m not on the brink of ending my life. I think I’m doing better than I have since all of this started.
Around the time of my last post, my story blew up and I was getting messages from people who saw it on TikTok and YouTube. I had to take a step back because it was a little overwhelming. I have over 100 unread messages here. I appreciate it but it was a little uncomfortable at the time, and I got to the point where I didn’t really want to talk about the situation with my wife and her AP anymore.
So as of today, our baby is due in less than 10 weeks. We’re in the home stretch now. I don’t feel prepared at all. All of this other stuff has just been so distracting.
I started working on a nursery. It’s not done yet, but I have the floor finished and the walls painted. My ex-wife was impressed with the color scheme and furniture I chose. She’s not legally my ex-wife yet but I’ve started calling her that. It sort of makes it easier.
I also packed up a bunch of her stuff. Originally I refused to spend my time packing up her things, but eventually just said screw it and started packing it. I’m at the point where it’ll just be easier to not see all of her stuff around here. Why did I leave it for so long?
She came over to get some of the boxes I packed up. She came alone. Things were fine between us. I loaded the stuff into her car. We didn’t argue. At one point she started to tear up and said she fucked up. I said yeah she did, but there’s no point talking about it now. She shit all over our marriage. She has her muscle bound asshole to go home to now anyway so who cares. She said “I know, but it’s not the same.” I told her nothing has been the same since she decided to fuck him the first time.
Supposedly he’s going to “let” me be in the delivery room when my baby is born. I didn’t even argue it when she said it like that, but inside I was boiling at the idea of him letting me be there for the birth of my child. She says she talked to him and he agreed it wouldn’t really be right to not allow me to be there. I’m going to take what I can get if it means being there for the birth of my child. I’m going to try to just ignore him for the time being. She was acting all sweet and laying on all of the “I really want you there. I really need you there” stuff and I know mentally I’m not in a place to be that cold to her when she starts acting that way. I’m trying to be indifferent more than anything else but it’s so hard when she’s actually around and starts looking at me a certain way and making me feel bad. She invited me over to see the nursery they have set up at his house. I’m not sure I can bring myself to go into another man’s house and look at the nursery set up for my kid.
I did ask her if she was truly safe there though. I don’t know why, it’s just been bothering me. As pissed as I still am, I don’t want to find out he’s mistreating her and I definitely don’t want my kid to be going into an unsafe household. I haven’t told her about anything her sister has told me. They probably won’t last but as of right now there’s a very good chance my newborn baby will be going home to his house. It kills me to think about. It’s almost soul destroying to think about if I dwell on it too long.
She says she’s fine. He genuinely loves her. He’s great with kids. He accepts that she’s having a baby and that this is part of the package. She insists it’s not weird because she wasn’t pregnant when anything started between them.
I asked her why she did it…why did she ever let anything start between them in the first place. She said “I don’t know.” Then went into “I don’t want to talk about this” mode and left pretty soon after. Typical behavior from her - just run away.
Overall I’m doing ok. I’m not sitting here depressed and drinking a bottle of scotch every night anymore. I mean on occasion, but for the most part no. I feel more used to my new normal now, and that’ll all change yet again pretty soon.
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP
DO NOT CONTACT THE OOP's OR COMMENT ON LINKED POSTS, REMEMBER - RULE 7

Ok I wasn’t sure where to put this. My ex bsf (up until this past year) we can call June. June and I used to be super close. We were the best friends of our school. Teachers would ask where the other one was, kids would be concerned if we weren’t together etc. I would even drop everything to help her. Once we were in the middle of a ceremony and her dad had a medical emergency, I dropped everything, leaving the ceremony before getting my awards and went to the hospital with her. I was with her until early the next day and comforted her all night. June is the kind of person who is spontaneous, I am a busy person and like to have a schedule. We were the closest last year and I’m so torn on this. At the beginning of the 23-24 school year I started dating this boy, we can call him K, and June didn’t mind. But after our first date I didn’t really talk about it, we just kind of hung out, and I don’t like talking about personal relationship and events with others. She started to become rude towards him, calling him names and even going so far as to call him “an event” (since apparently I update her on events). She would make fun of his hair and be really rude. One time she even got mad at me for going to watch a new movie with him (that he also had been waiting for years to watch) rather than going with her (she hadn’t seen the 1st, 2nd, or 3rd). I told her to stop many times but she never did. But we had no classes together this year and she would tell me these things in the hall when I would meet up with her. Slowly I stopped meeting up with her. She started talking about this girl “Pat” a lot too. Pat became all she talked about. She wouldn’t walk home with me, she ditched our few hang outs we planned, she even would come up to me telling me about their plans before going off with her. I knew I was being replaced with Pat but I tried to ignore it, hoping it wasn’t true. I didn’t tell anyone about this, not even my parents, because I didn’t want to add drama to her life. As I didn’t show up in the hall as as often our other friend “Tom” kept coming up to me saying “I’m gonna fix your friendship… you need to try harder…”. A lot of times when he did this I found it hard to not explode saying how she was the one who replaced me. And everytime he did that I would feel bad again. I know I had distanced myself but during that distancing time she had already been becoming closer to Pat. Sometimes I didn’t want to believe it. Once we had combined lunch and I saw her. She wasn’t sitting with our group of friends but rather with Pat and her friends. From my group I found out she had left their table a while ago and started ignoring them. At recess I tried to hang out with her but when I tried talking to her I got interrupted, ignored, and disregarded. This is when I started to accept she had replaced me. This happened a couple more times in different scenarios, everytime I chalked it up to my mind being over dramatic. But then I invited her and a couple other friends over for an almost end of year party and she spent the whole time telling stories about Pat, being unfair to her old friends, and being rude to my boyfriend. When I told her to stop she got mad at me, she then called Pat and made plans with her in front of us all. In the last day of school she took our idea (cowboy hats to sign) from last year and did it with Pat, and made plans with all her new friends to hang out after. I saw all the posts on instagram over the next couple days. I honestly felt so hurt she didn’t even invite me as I was friends with most of those girls as well. I think it was also me fully realizing she replaced me. Ever since I have been so conflicted on what to do. I really want to text or call and ask why she replaced me but I don’t know if I’m being over dramatic when saying I was replaced. I just hate how fast she threw away our friendship. Would I be the A hole to text and ask? Or do I let it go?

I am NOT OOP, OOP is u/Parking_Breadfruit80
Originally posted to AITAH
Previous BoRU
[New Update]: AITA for refusing to have my dad in my life after he chose his new family?
Editor’s Note: changed letters to names for readability, originally used Logan, but now switched to Luke based on OOP’s latest update.
Editor’s Note 2: Also have removed some older relevant comments as they have been covered in the further updates and needing more space to fit all posts here.
Thanks to u/queenlegolas and u/Direct-Caterpillar77 for suggesting this BoRU
Trigger Warnings: verbal abuse, emotional abuse and manipulation, infidelity, gaslighting, betrayal. vandalism, obsessive behavior
RECAP
Original Post (rareddit): April 20, 2024
When I was 13 my dad had an affair and left my mom and moved in with his affair partner who ill call Jane.
At first me and my sister would visit every weekend and I will admit he was a good dad although I never liked Jane.
When Jane got pregnant and had their son our visits became less frequent and my dad was more concerned with his new family. He would miss some of my my recitals or my sisters competitions because he was busy with his son.
When I was 16. Jane decided she wanted to move for a new job opportunity. Me and my sister begged him not to leave us bit he just said "I need to prioritise my family". He moved 10 hours away. That pretty much ended our relationship and I decided to go no contact as it was clear he did not consider me family.
My younger sister stayed in contact with him. He would try and call me and offer for me to come and visit with my sister but I refused. When he came back to see my sister I would refuse to speak to him when he turned up at the house. I didn't invite him to my high school or college graduation.
I'm now 33 and have remained no contact with him, he has over the years repeatedly tried contacting me and getting his family to contact me on his behalf to reconcile. I have avoided family events in case he attended including my sisters wedding and baby showers.
My dad and his family moved back to our home town 3 months ago and he has been relentless trying to reconcile.
I have received messages from my half brother and sister wanting a relationship saying he's a great dad. My dad found out I'm getting married and keeps trying to contact me and has even tried to speak to my fiancé.
Jane messaged me saying I have broke my dads heart repeatedly and I'm pathetic and should get therapy. I replied back that she was nothing but a home wrecking whore and then blocked her.
Everyone seems to be wanting me to let him back in my life. I'm sick of all the harassment and accidentally bumping into my dad and his family in the town. Whenever I see him I just walk away and refuse to speak to them. Everyone is saying he's a good dad and tried his best to remain in contact but I pushed him away.
Everyone is pressuring me my mom, sister. Grandparents aunts and uncles, even some of my friends. My fiancé has even started saying I'm the AH for shutting him out. Its all starting to get to me so am I aita?
Edit:
Thank you for your comments I haven't got through all of them but I'm glad to know that most of you think I'm NTA which is a huge relief as I thought I was going insane.
I'm going to have a serious conversation with my fiancé as most of you pointed out he should have my back. If he continues to defend my dad then I'm going to have to think if this relationship should go any further. We are 12 weeks out from the wedding but need to sort this out sooner than later.
For information
I own a local business moving away is not an option
I live in a small town where everyone knows everyone and he is friends with a lot of people including my fiancé family.
My dad did not come back for me - he came back because Jane’s parents need help and care.
He has not financially supported me since I was 17 he withheld my college fund to try and blackmail me into having a relationship with him so I had to work and get loans.
I've avoided events because my family use it as a chance to force reconciliation. He also won't leave me alone and makes scenes - hell come up to me talking as if nothing has happened try to hug me or starts crying.
I cant simply cut everyone off - everyone is on his side and against me including my own mother.
Edit 2
To give you all a bit more context when he left my mom for Jane he only wanted us on the weekend my mom offered him 50/50 but refused.
I didn't like Jane and was standoffish with her because I knew what they had done- my sister was too young to understand and was more accepting of her. Jane was mean to me but nice to my sister when I was at my dad's I felt uncomfortable and she would purposefully leave me out of fun activities or plan things purely for my sister. We had a few arguments over minor things but my dad always took her side. My dad and me used to have daddy daughter date at least once every 2 weeks. Jane put a stop to that.
When she had my half brother we went from going every weekend to once every 6 weeks. My dad was MIA and had finally gotten his precious son. He stopped trying with me.
When they moved I was so upset he chose to leave us. He didn't want custody just for us to visit him every now and again and speak to him on the phone. Parenting at a distance so all of his focus was on his new family
When I graduated from high school and refused to invite him everything blew up Jane called me some terrible names and so did my dad and he refused to give me my college fund unless I started being part of the family again. From what I gathered, he spent it on his new family.
I'm sick of being the one to miss out on events with my family. I would be willing to be in the same room but not interact or even be civil but he pushes things and makes it impossible
Edit 3
Have spoken to my fiancé. Update will be posted shortly
AITAH has no consensus bot, OOP was NTA
OOP on staying away from the father and his family and blocking Jane

OOP: I've tried my best to stay away from him and his family but with it being a small town its impossible to avoid them. Some of the times I've bumped into him seemed a bit too coincidental and feel like it was a set up.
I have blocked Jane can't stand the woman she was always mean to me even when I was a child because I was standoffish. My sister is 5 years younger and was more accepting of her so my sister and Jane have a good relationship.

 
Update #1 (rareddit): April 20, 2024 (10 hours later)
Thank you for all of the comments although most seem to be NTA some were YTA. Some of you gave helpful suggestions which I am planning to take on board.
I have just spoken to my fiancé and unfortunately it has not gone well but at this point in time I've had enough and want to runaway and never come back.
My fiancé knows my history with my dad and Jane. I explained to him that him siding with my father and pressuring me was hurting me and as my fiancé he should be supporting me.
My fiancé who I'll call Luke told me he can't support me in doing something that he knows is wrong. Luke told me that he had spoke to my father and had an understanding of both sides of the story and believes that if we both sit down and talk we can sort this out and reconcile.
I told Luke I don't want this and want no contact and asked why he is even speaking to my father. Luke admitted his father who is friends with my dad encouraged Luke to speak to him and hear him out.
Luke told me my dad loved me very much and always wanted to be in my life and has pictures of me (I'm guessing he got these from my family as my social media is set to private). Luke said my dad is heartbroken at the state of our relationship because I was being unreasonable about him moving away when I was young. Luke stated I got on the wrong foot with Jane and that I was not innocent in the breakdown of the relationship. He told me that everyone can see the truth but me and to look in the mirror because I'm the problem.
Needless to say I broke down crying and asked him why he was doing this to me and not supporting me. Luke claims to love me but won't stand by and watch me be "a heartless bitch".
After he said this I stood up told him that he shouldn't marry a heartless bitch and walked out. I'm currently sat in my car. My phone is blowing up with Luke trying to contact me but I don’t want to speak to him. I feel like I'm losing everything and everyone I dont understand what is happening.
 
Update #2 (rareddit): April 21, 2024
Hi everyone thanks for the comments and letting me sound off on you as I desperately need an outside perspective.
I know a lot of you are telling me to cut all contact with my family and leave town. That is not an option for me financially and I would not be able to set up business elsewhere all my money is invested in it and I have only managed to get established recently with steady income, relocating is not an option for me. I love my friends and family and don't want to cut everyone off, I love my hometown I grew up here this is my life and I'm not willing to walk away from it.
I didn't expect to write another update this fast but a lot has happened today.
So firstly I agreed to meet my dad to talk and try and get him to back off and leave me alone. I asked my mom to arrange it, just him no one else. I wasn't sure if he would agree to that but within 15 minutes of her calling he was at the door.
I asked my mom to stay and mediate. To summarize the conversation. These are a bit messed up because it's a lot to remember.
Me: * I asked him to give me space and stop trying to get everyone on his side and let me live my life.

• I told him he stopped being my father when he moved 10 hrs away
  
• I told him Jane was mean to me and told him about all the horrible things she has said to me over the years.
  
• I hate how he chose Jane and his new family over me and how he told me he had to prioritise them and how he basically told me I wasn't family
  
• He was an AH for withholding my college fund and trying to blackmail me and then spending it on his new family
  
• I hate how I have missed major family events because he attended the events and would make them awkward.
  
• I don't see his son and daughter as my family and I'm sick of them trying to speak to me and approach me
  
• he keeps making scenes every time he sees me and making me look the bad guy
  
• he keeps inserting himself into my life going to my fiancé’s family events, going behind my back to talk and sway Luke to his side
  
• I hate how he cheated on my mom and broke our family up and then listened to Jane who stopped our dates, missed my recitals, reduced contact and was more concerned about his son.
  

Him * He loves me and always has he is never going to give up trying to reconnect and he has given me enough space over the years and he is done hearing about my life from 2nd hand knowledge and is not willing to miss any more if it.

• he loves Jane and and can't regret his past because he wouldn't have her or his 2 kids. He wishes he had done it differently and ended his marriage with my mom first.

*his kids are innocent and I shouldn't be taking it out on them they just want to know their big sister

• I was difficult child who was rude and disrespectful to Jane breaking her belongings, calling her names, ruining day trips.
  
• when Jane got pregnant she was high risk and me coming every week and starting arguments was stressing her out so for her and his sons sake he stopped the weekend visitation. He still spoke to us on the phone and took us out for dinner and days out but just didn't let us sleep over.
  
• when his son was born he was premature and had health complications which meant him staying in hospital for weeks and frequent hospital admissions. Jane was also going through PPD so he wasn't able to see us as much and had to miss some events when he was taking care of Jane and his son.
  
• Jane was unable to get a job locally and the opportunity was too good to pass up so they had to move. He pointed out that he came back to town for weekends as much as he could to see us and would always invite us to fly out and spend vacations with him. He phoned everyday but I refused to speak or see him.
  
• They had flown in for my graduation but I refused to invite him and he lost his temper and refused to give me my college fund. He apologised for this and tried to fix this a few weeks later and give me the money but I refused it. He has not spent the money he still has it and I have only to ask and I can have it.
  
• he had visited me at my college to try and talk to me but I refused to see him.
  
• He is not going to miss family events
  
• he makes a scene because he misses me and just wants to talk to me and reconcile but I always end up running way or shouting insults at him and Jane.
  
• He has been trying for 16years to reconnect but I shut him down at every turn he just wants to be my dad.
  
• He is old friends with my fiancé dad and he hoped my fiancé could talk some sense into me and open a line of communication.
  
• he feels I never gave Jane a chance no matter how she tried in the beginning and hoped we could be civil. Jane hates knowing I talk bad about her, am mean to her children and won't speak to him.
  

He wants:
My dad is in therapy and wants me to join him for family sessions.
He wants me to spend time with him 1-1
To stop being rude and mean to his children and spend time with them.
Stop trash talking Jane to everyone and actually give her a chance
Invite for him and my family to my wedding and to walk me down the aisle.
I want:
Him to stop talking to my friends and getting others to try and talk to me on his behalf
Keep Jane away from me completely
To be be civil at events or in town providing he does not try and hug me or talk to me.
My mom told him he was being unrealistic with some of the things he wants especially regarding Jane and his other children so we have agreed for now.
I will attend 3 therapy sessions with him when he arranges it. (my mom thinks I need individual therapy as well) He will stop trying to interfere in my life and relationships He will keep Jane away from me and talk to his kids to give me space. I will be civil to him in public as long as he respects my personal space and does not approach or pressure me.
As for my fiancé - I still havent spoken to him, he turned up at my moms but she refused to let him in. He keeps blowing up my phone and so does his family and friends telling me to hear him out.
During my conversation with my dad I found out my dad has paid for most of the vendors and services for my upcoming wedding and they have been on speaking terms for quite some time ( longer than I thought). Luke told me his family had paid for these and i believed him. I feel betrayed by him and that I can't trust him. I'm going to have to speak to him eventually but I dont feel ready.
Relevant Comments
OOP on if she can block her father and if she can have an order on him to stay away from her

OOP: I wouldn't be able to get a restraining order against him. What am I going to do tell the police my dad is talking to people in the town and my friends about me. He is showing up to parties and events he's invited to. He's trying to talk to me when he bumps into me in town?
He is not on my social media , he is blocked on my phone other than events and meeting in town that can be chalked up to coincidence I have nothing to report

 
Update #3 - April 27, 2024
Firstly I'd like to apologise for taking down my posts. I was really upset and felt under lot of pressure and needed space to think without constant messages. Some of you were trying to be helpful and I apreciate that but some of the abusive messages I received was terrible.
I'm updating for those who have asked for an update and were supportive to me. This will be my last post and I wont be posting again.
Firstly the deal with my dad is off the table. He couldn't even manage a week without overstepping my boundaries. So there will be no therapy sessions with him and I will remain no contact.
As you are all aware after speaking to my dad and agreeing a way forward and my conditions.
Keep Jane away from me Tell his kids to back off Don't pressure me or invade my space
It lasted all of 3 days. Everyone seemed happy I had "forgiven" my dad and told me so. My sister was excited I was willing to give him a chance and with some pressure I agreed to have dinner with just her and my dad.
When my sister and I arrived at the restaurant to meet our dad he was not alone. He had invited Jane, my grandparents his son and daughter. He got up and tried to hug me.
I immediately became upset asking why they were there. My dad told me that if we have any hope of repairing our relationship I had to accept Jane and my younger siblings. I told him he just broke our deal and to never contact me again and tried to leave. He refused to let me leave and grabbed hold of me.
When I say all hell broke loose I mean it. I started shouting at them. My Dad, Jane and grandparents tried to gaslight me and convince me to sit down when that didn't work things got very heated and a shouting match started and a lot of unforgivable things were said by my dad and Jane including remarks about my appearance and calling me a psychopath. My half brother walked out of the restaurant and my half sister started to cry.
My sister actually surprised me and defended me, shouting at my dad for ruining things after all this time when I had finally given him a chance. She even slapped Jane. She got me out of there and apologised to me. I think this was the first time she had really seen how Jane was with me and how she treat me. She kept saying she couldn't understand how dad had spent years saying he would do anything to have me back and then would do this when he finally got his chance to rebuild the relationship.
My dad has been trying to contact me but I have blocked him and refused to talk to him. I have also refused to speak to my grandparents. My dad has tried to convince my mom and sister to speak to me but I think he's burned his bridges with them.
The incident from the restaurant has spread and some people seem to be backing off. Like I said what my dad and Jane shouted at me was unforgiveable and they were overheard and this is a small town. Hopefully people will back off and those who won't Im going to have to cut them out.
My sister is very unhappy with my dad and Jane and not speaking to them. She is blaming them for me going no contact again. My sister is not letting them see her kids. I don't know if my sister will reconcile but right now she is furious. My mom is also furious and apparently had a few choice word with my dad and Jane and has promised she will never pressure me again to speak to him.
I am going to go to individual therapy I think I definitely need it. I do feel bad about my half siblings as they havnt done anything wrong and am maybe open to having a distanced kind of relationship with them in the future but I'm not ready yet or if I'll ever be. I did send them a message on Facebook to apologise and tell them they've done nothing wrong.
Lastly to update you all - in regards to my fiance well I spoke to him yesterday about everything I had been radio silent since walking out on him.
Basically he was pressured by his father to speak to my dad and was fed a sob story of a misunderstood father desperately wanting to be in his daughters life. Luke had become annoyed with me refusing to attend his family events and walking out of his mother's birthday party when I realised my dad and Jane was there as he was getting pressure from his family about me ruining their events.
He just wanted everyone to be happy and get along clearly at my expense.
Luke admitted my dad had paid for some of the vendors for the wedding but he did not know this until after it was already paid. His father had told Luke that him and his mom had paid. My dad had told Luke it was a gift and his way of contributing. Luke admitted my dad had asked him to speak to me on his behalf.
I told Luke he had betrayed my trust and I couldn't see myself marrying someone who does not support me. He broke down crying and apologising to me and promising to never do it again. Luke was heartbroken and begged for a 2nd chance.
To those of you who wanted me to break up with him, I'm sorry to disappoint you but we are going to try and work through this. Apart from this issue he had been the best partner and I genuinely think that he had been manipulated by his family and my dad. Luke has promised to stand up to his family and go no contact with my dad.
I'm still living at my moms as I still need some space which I wont have if I move home. We are going to contact our wedding vendors and see what our options are next week. Luke is begging for a postponement rather than cancel it altogether. We may still break up as actions speak louder than words and I need to see if he can rebuild what we had and show me I can trust and depend on him.
Relevant Comments
OOP on if she is able to change her contact information and what about Luke

OOP: There's no point changing my number when I've done this before he always manages to get it again.
As for Luke - breaking up is not off the table. I'm giving him a chance to show me he means what he says. I always thought I had a decent relationship with Luke’s family, but clearly not. I'm not asking him to go NC with them thats for him to decide. I'm certainly going to distance myself from them and any further incidents no contact.
As for any future children if we are still together I won't be trusting them with my children at all

 
Update #4: May 4, 2024
Hi everyone I did not plan to make another update at all but I'm still getting messages for an update and thought I would let you know the recent developments.
Firstly I have cancelled the wedding I was able to get some partial refunds but have lost some money. Luke begged me not to cancel the wedding but there was no way I could marry him after what he did.
I was set on giving him a 2nd chance and he promised me he would go low contact and stand up to his parents and issue an ultimatum that we would not tolerate any contact with my dad and Jane. Basically he would tell them we would not attend any event or party if they were invited and we would not tolerate any attempt to force contact or relationship with my dad.
He met with them to explain this to them. When he came back from this meeting he was quite irritable with me and appeared to have had a change of heart to summarize it - he was trying to convince me his family only meant well and that he can't go low contact with his family because he loves them and he can't dictate their friendships. He then tried to convince me it won't be an issue in the future and his father would speak to my dad and tell him to be on his best behaviour in my presence.
As soon as I heard this people's comments went through my head and the main one being if we had children he would take them to his family where my dad and Jane would be and I would have no control over this. At that moment
I realised I couldn't trust Luke and never would be able to.
I broke up with him, he is not taking it well and keeps begging me to take him back and that he would go no contact with his family. His family and friends are trying to convince me on his behalf not to end our relationship. He has made his choice and proven to me he is spineless. I don't need him in my life.
In regards to my dad I'm looking into getting a restraining order given what happened in the restaurant I might be able to but i dont know yet a friend of mine is helping me look into this.
My dad has kept a low profile since last week apart from a couple of attempts to apologize to me I havnt heard much from him. My sister still won't speak to him or Jane. Unlike me my sister is highly confrontational and has blasted him and Jane on social media with what happened at the restaurant and things that have happened in the past which I didn't know about.
My sister and Jane had a very public screaming match when she had seen them in town due to my sisters posts and demanding to take them down it ended up with Jane assaulting my sister. My dad apparently sided with Jane in this. My sister now hates Jane and refuses to speak to our dad who is also trying to contact her.
My dad and Jane’s reputation seems to have taken a hit and between the incident in the restaurant and my sisters fight with Jane and het numerous Facebook posts about them, People are gossiping. This has worked well for me because some people have backed off which Im happy about unfortunately there are a few people still on his side including my ex's parents.
As for my half siblings there's not much of an update in regards to them.
I've found a therapist however there is a bit of a waiting list before I can start my therapy. I'm still living with my mom who is completely on my side and I have found a kitten and pick her up next week.

 

----NEW UPDATE----

Update #5: May 19, 2024 (2 weeks later)
Hi everyone thought I would give you an update as to what's been happening the last couple of weeks for those of you who are still interested.
Firstly I'm still at my moms and I got my little kitten. I've named her sascha and she is the sweetest thing but very energetic. For those of you asking for pictures I'll try, but she refuses to stay still long enough to get a one that's not blurred. I love her already. My mom continues to be my rock. IM still waiting for therapy but am finding reddit useful and therapeutic and the support I've received from most of the people on here has been great and helped me see things more clearly so a big thankyou to everyone.
As for my ex now that we've broken up I feel lighter and free and being away from him has made me see all the red flags that I was blind to in our relationship and feel like I've dodged a bullet. Luke (using real names because my posts were discovered) is not taking the breakup well and has taken over from my father constantly bothering me.
If you read this Luke we are DONE and I'm not changing my mind so stop calling me, stop coming to the house and stop sending me flowers! I'm moving on so you should too.
My sister Emma is still firmly on my side and has washed her hands of Jane (stepmonster) and they are not on speaking terms after my sister told everyone about Janes affairs.
Jane is still trying to save face saying my sister is lying and telling everyone she can how we are just the worst and that we have treated her terrible over the years and trying to ruin her marriage. Don't think anyone is buying what she is saying. She has sent abusive messages to me and my sister and when we've bumped into her she's been screaming at us and threatening us. My sisters car had been keyed and my store windows were smashed. We can't prove its her unfortunately but she is the most likely culprit.
My half siblings are definitely my dads children they tested then years ago when she was a baby. From what I've heard they're not speaking to Jane at all.
As for my dad he seems to have grown a spine and has kicked out Jane she is now living with her parents. From what I've heard he's thinking about divorce. I havnt had any contact with my dad except for a text saying he was sorry for everything. As for getting a restraining order I'm more concerned about getting one against Jane at the moment.
Relevant Comments
OOP on if she has cameras at her place

OOP: I have cameras but you can't see if it her because of the angle I'm getting more fitted for better coverage

OOP on if she has been speaking to her half siblings (father’s side) and how their relationships are with Jane now that the truth got out. And how the family is reacting

OOP: I'm not speaking to my dad or Jane or my half siblings. I've gotten this info from a cousin on my dad's side so not sure if it's true or if there is more to this. + The only people who knew were my grandparents and sister. Unfortunately when Jane and my sister fell out my sister decided to expose her on social media to everyone. My half siblings knew about her recent affair but not the one years ago.
As for my dad I don't know and I'm not going to reach out to ask

OOP on if she will forgive her father and if he would get a second chance without Jane present

OOP: Yep- hes destroyed my relationship, his and janes relationship with Emma and by sounds of it his own relationship. All because he couldn't respect my boundaries
No the damage is already done. He had his chance to fix things with me and he blew it. I just want to be left alone and get on with my life

 

DO NOT COMMENT IN LINKED POSTS OR MESSAGE OOPs – BoRU Rule #7

THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT OOP

Thread topics include, but are not limited to:

• General discussion related to the day's events
• Technical analysis, trading ideas & strategies
• Quick questions that do not warrant a separate post

Thread guidelines:

• Be excellent to each other.
• Do not make posts outside of the daily thread for the topics mentioned above.

⚡Tip Fellow Redditors over the Lightning Network⚡

• Send sats as tips using lntipbot to show appreciation for good content.
• Instructions and more information.

Other ways to interact:
Get an invite to live chat on our Slack group

I’m relatively new lateral to the firm. There’s been several instances which I can’t directly prove, but one recently where the associate (who’s in charge of social events for juniors and the summer associate events) straight up didn’t invite me— all juniors in the group plus summer associates attended and the firm got a picture of it online. I’m the only one not there.
This time, it’s starting to make me look bad, like I’m the one who doesn’t care to attend/get into the firm’s culture.
Question: should I 1) directly go tell HR (nicely, diplomatically w/o pointing fingers) OR 2) should I first email the associate, asking them why/how I didn’t get an invite, express wanting to get invites, and not complain about these recent events to HR?

I feel silly posting this as an adult but here it goes.
We have parent/kids friend group we formed last year. The kids are Kindergarteners and go to the same public school. We all live within a few blocks. We all seem to click and have fun together (adults and kids).
We have had plenty of group play dates and events throughout the year. Probably at least one every 2-3 weeks but we have not been invited to any for about 2.5 months now and the last one was hosted by us. At least twice on weekends I have been driving through the neighborhood and I’ve noticed the rest of the group got together at one of their houses (I know from the cars parked in the driveways). I never thought much of it since it’s none of my business.
The problem is I think my daughter has caught wind through school talk and now keeps on worrying about being left out of play dates. Like she wants to bring gifts to school for her friends because she says if she doesn’t they won’t invite her to play dates. She is very sensitive and shy and has a hard time making friends. This friend group has helped her get over that and open up more but now she’s becoming so insecure it breaks my heart.
I don’t really think they are leaving us out for anything personal. We still interact at other events (after school classes and the park etc.) and nothing has been off as far as I can tell at those events. I suspect it’s more of a capacity issue or logistics with siblings.
What do you all suggest I do about this? I feel silly bringing this up to the other parents but I also hate seeing my daughter like this. Part of me tells me this is just life and I should leave it.

I recently went on a 4 weeks trip across 5 countries to celebrate our 14 year anniversary with my wife. We stayed at the following properties:
Fairfield Seoul
Ritz Carlton Kuala Lumpur
Marina Bay Sands Hotel
St. Regis Singapore
Ritz Carlton Fari Islands Maldives
Grand Sheraton Dubai
JW Marriott Dubai
Al Maha, Luxury Collection
Other than the MBS Hotel in Singapore, which was a bucket list hotel I really wanted to stay at, all other properties were under the Marriott portfolio. In this review, I will cover each of their stay impression from a Titanium Elite perspective. YMMV.
On this trip I experienced amazing service at almost all the Marriott properties. In fact, starting with the St. Regis in Singapore, the staff and elite recognition team coordinated with each of the subsequent properties I was going to visit and provided a bit of an over arching, consistent service experience. For example, the JW Marriott in Dubai requested a photo of my wife and I from the St. Regis Singapore team, which they made into a custom anniversary card and placed it in our suite as we checked in. They also received pointers on our favorite tea from the Ritz Carlton Maldives and added them to our room. Multiple Marriott properties on our trip teamed up and worked together to make our trip absolutely unforgettable. I have never felt so valued in my travels.

Fairfield Seoul

First up is the Fairfield Seoul. The location isn't the most amazing since it takes about 30 minutes to get to any major tourist attraction. However, it is right next to the yeongdeungpo train station so it is quite accessible in general as you can catch the train to go pretty much every direction in seoul. There is a coin laundry store 1 block away that opens 24 hours a day, and the airport transfer bus stops right in front of the hotel as well. In terms of amenities the hotel ticks all the right boxes.
Unfortunately for any Marriott loyalist, your elite status won't get you anything here as they don't offer free breakfast. There is also no nicer rooms or suites. The best they offered me was a higher floor room, which was like a shoe box. I had some pretty servere allergy when staying here as well, I think the ac unit aren't properly maintained and cleaned. It can be a cesspool for germs if not done. Although the elevator set up is nice and modern, where you swipe your card and it tells you which elevator to get in without you needing to press the floor button, higher floor sometimes still takes a long time to get into an elevator.
https://preview.redd.it/v1d7gyj1to2d1.jpg?width=1868&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=14194a13603e8230680772c139bf6a869833410c
The restaurant on site, if you do want to have a breakfast buffet, has a fairly decent selection and is reasonably priced for western standards, at around 17,000 won. They claim it is independent from the hotel so no free breakfast for anyone. Nice for them to have the convenience of locating directly inside the hotel though, I wonder what their main clientele is?
Moxys will give you free breakfast and their locations are a bit better than fairfield. They cost slightly more per night. Something to consider.
https://preview.redd.it/qm7owqblto2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d4ab9de37a7052ac477e9efdf46f6ac91db227e3
Staff wasn't very friendly. They do speak very good English in general, but aren't keen to help you much. For example, there was a pretty big pool of water on a bench in the lobby. I almost sat on it while I was waiting for my wife. I informed the front desk about the water, just letting them know it's there. 20 minutes after I was about to leave, the water was still there. Tells you how much they actually care about their job.
The good news is, this was the worst hotel on our entire trip, it is onward and upward from here.

Ritz Carlton Kuala Lumpur

While we were still in South Korea, Ritz Carlton Kuala Lumpur's team reached out to me. To my surprise, they offered me access to the club lounge, free breakfast, room upgrades, the whole 9 yards. You know, things that Ritz Carlton isn't required to offer to elite members. I got them all.
As we approach the hotel, we entered through a separate entrance, where club lounge access is located. For guests that have club lounge access, we checked in at the club, instead of going through the lobby. It was quite late by the time we arrived at the hotel, around 8pm. The Assistant Club Lounge Manager, Musaddiq Bin Muzafar, warmly greets us. I mention his name here because he is one of the finest, polite, and professional gentlmen I have ever encountered on my travels. He sat us down, took care of our luggages, then went through every little details on how the property was going to pamper us. The club lounge served 6 different meal services a day, it was just over the top. He apologized for not having mobile keys at the property, no big deal whatsoever. We had access to a 24 hour butler service, where we could get non-alcoholic drinks completely free any time of the day. The list went on and on.
https://preview.redd.it/azkct0mtto2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=08982b8acb5978c4ca4b3b169e7652b34342dfa3
The hotel is around 25 years old. However, you can definitely tell they spared no expense building this property. The marbles ran up and down the walls in addition to the floors. We were upgraded to a gorgeous one bedroom suite. Our hotel room was adorned with balloons, cholocates, towel arts to celebrate our special occasion. The rooms all have high ceilings. The entire bathrooms were marbled on all surfaces. The bed, on the firm side, is one of the best hotel beds I have ever rest in. The Mrs. agreed.
https://preview.redd.it/fpto6bazto2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2772ee801071ddac7785abcb29d2c86bb53da5fb
https://preview.redd.it/qtbt2cazto2d1.jpg?width=1868&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b798ff347b4e975c989b242d7480b6a204137956
We had the option of dining in the lounge or their main restaurant for breakfast. The latter was full of selections from the east and west. Some of the highlights included the freshly made roti and nasi lemak, the unusually thick cut smoke salmon, smoke duck, and crab omelette.
https://preview.redd.it/5rj2lw5kvo2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a311f6a25dd522e66750121032ad28b81b7da51d
https://preview.redd.it/7nqlgq5kvo2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3b5926435b62dd352cb8befe3ba2e892f6b4e623
We tried all the meal services other than lunch in the club lounge. The staff was very attentive, and we had the pleasure of Ms. Shi Ying taking care of us on many meal services there. Although she is fairly new at the hotel, her bright smile and quick to attendiness made our day just so much more relaxed. She comes across as geniune and enjoys her job very much, and was always quick to provide assistance and take our food and beverages orders. We know the hotel is good when we have a hard time wanting to leave the hotel and go see attractions, because the hotel is so comfortable.
Originally, we planned on getting a spa treatment once we are in another country. However, the world class service we received from the staff in Ritz Carlton Kuala Lumpur intrigued me to inquire about their spa facilities, and upon review, we made a couple bookings and were glad we did. I didn't get my massage therapist's name, but she was absolutely amazing, and is one of the best massage therapists I've ever encountered. I usually go with male massage therapists because of their stronger pressure, but this lady massage therapist at Kuala Lumpur was amazing and able to exert as much pressure as I needed. The 2 hour session practically flew by, and I was thoroughly relaxed after climbing 300 stairs at the Batu Cave.
https://preview.redd.it/20f79eynyo2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=12f68fa8016f255817d21dcf67cda0d51d24a6ef
I casually mentioned to Mr. MD Monayem, another club lounge gentleman, that our flight out of Kuala Lumpur will be really early and thus we would unfortunately miss the world-class breakfast at their propertly. He promptly asked about my flight details, and proceed to arrange for a to-go breakfast for two, plus coffee, for 4:30am in the morning, all ready for us at the lobby when we check out. The butler swiftly brought our luggages down as MD planned a few days ahead, and we arrived in the airport without any surprises.
The Ritz Carlton Kuala Lumpur is one of the very best properties I have ever stayed in, not just because of their beautifully appointed facilities, but most importantly, their professional, caring, and warm ladies and gentlemen serving us. I will make it a point to return to this hotel next time I am in Kuala Lumpur, and ensure all my friends and acquaintances know about its legendary service.

Marina Bay Sands Hotel

Leaving Malaysia early in the morning, we arrived in Changi airport around 9am, and through the MRT, got to Marina Bay Sands Hotel's check in counter around 11am. Knowing that we were going to arrive early, we sent an email to the hotel a week early to see if there would be any opportunity for an early check-in. In the response, they mentioned the possibility subject to availability.
Upon arriving at the check-in desk at Tower 1, the atmosphere was quite a contrast from the friendly possibility conveyed in the email response. It first took us about 10 minutes of waiting, until someone approached us at the line. Before even looking at our booking, he told us promptly that check-in is not available until 3pm. I mentioned about the email corresspondence, and that is when he reluctantly took my reservation number, then told us to head down to Tower 3 and enquire there, since we would be staying at Tower 3. He also then said there will be a charge for early check-in if it is available.
https://preview.redd.it/0f2oqhiryo2d1.jpg?width=1868&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f9150dbed6b4455c317540fa2c6b659d335a8c25
When we got to Tower 3, the check-in counter had 2 people on staff. One was helping a customer while the other stood there and looked at the other person, walking back and forth. Including us, there were 4 more sets of guests waiting in line. It took 30 minutes, I'm not exaggerating here, until that person that was doing nothing, acknowledge the guests in front of us in the line to go talk to him. Then another staff waved us down to go to the check-out counter to help us. The first couple was still standing at the counter, 30 minutes after, talking to the first staff. While we were waiting, the 4 of us in line started talking about how this extreme wait in line seemed to be a tactic from the hotel to discourage anyone to attempt to have an early check-in. To be honest, all I wanted to do at that point was to drop off my luggages for storage so we could be on our way.
At the Check-out counter, the lady kindly let us know it's because it is around their check out time of 11am, so they are mostly busy with checking the guests out. After some discussions, she advises us that if the room is ready before 3pm for early check-in, they will send us an email. She then proceeds to tell us in great details of all the fine-dining restaurants the hotel has to offer, including their multiple signature dishes from each restaurant. I then realized why it took so long for the preivouis guests. We wanted to get out of the hotel to go enjoy our day, so we wanted to leave. She then further informed us that there are renovations going on at Tower 3, and we are on the lower level. While the renovation is on the higher levels, we may still hear noises. I then asked if we could be moved to either Tower 1 or 2 to avoid the noises, she responded that our rate would not allow us to be in the nicer, newly renovated rooms of Tower 1 or 2, but she will do her best to give us the best room in the category in Tower 3. Considering the rate of booking this hotel was just shy of $1,000 SGD, I really didn't like hearing this information. Not only did MBS not inform us through email communication prior to our arrival, but the way the lady informed us the situation made us felt like we were some sort of poor guests that should've spend more to avoid noise inconvenience. We left the hotel a bit miffed, and went about our day. We were given temporary keys so we could access the rooftop pool, one of the main highlights of the hotel. We spent about an hour there before we left. It was nice, had a great view of the city, although a bit hot and smog. After the pool we went about our day.
We got the email notification that the room was ready at exactly 2:58pm. Once we checked into our room, my previous frustration with the frontline staff pretty much went away. The room was gorgeously appointed. The view to the Garden By The Bay (GBTB) was beautiful. The room itself was quite large, and the bathroom was marbled throughout, nothing sort of a luxury hotel, and easily rivaled the Ritz or JW of the Marriott brands. The entire minibar was free as well. Shortly after our check-in, a gentleman arrived to provide some turndown service. He was quite eager to help, and provided us multiple bags of chips and more coffee and drinks. I visited the pool at night for the second time, and this time I felt the magic of this rooftop infinity pool truly came alive. The lighting of the pool was a beautiful hue of turquoise. By now the city is lit up, the temperature dropped a bit, and people are clubbing in one of the rooftop bar with great music. Generally it had a great vibe. The view at night is nothing short of magical, and the pool wasn't very busy either so I never felt crowded. I ended up staying in the pool until it closed at midnight. This was one of the highlights of my Singapore visit.
https://preview.redd.it/zu80t3xwyo2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=33f56e4c48057a4da972cc69a926242fcae9503e
https://preview.redd.it/l9bsu6xwyo2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=29146986f5694da7d83ba15c0bac8af774cc8a94
https://preview.redd.it/ukeud5xwyo2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=73c663550ed716f04f6ada47e251ae1319f6dda1
The night view of GBTB from our room was even more beautiful than during the day. I took the opportunity and walked around the hotel, and all the way towards GBTB, pass 1am, and took in all its amazing architecture. This hotel is definitely an architectural and engineering masterpiece.
In the morning, the gentleman from the evening turndown service returned to offer more tea. I asked for his name this time. Chang Cheng was very courteous and we really appreciated his attententiveness during our stay.
Although we were offered a discount at their Rise restaurant for breakfast, we decided to go to the casino solely to have a lobster laksa noodle soup from the restaurant within. It was delicious. I also browsed the gift shop situated within the hotel, and bought a book that talked about how the MBS hotel was built.
Throughout our stay, we didn't hear the noise from renovation at all. And upon our check out, the frontline staff graciously offered us a 1-hour late check-out without any hesitation, which we really appreciated. As we called our grab to leave the hotel, the bell service staff checked our Grab details, invited us to wait inside the air-conditioned space, then queued us to head out as our Grab arrived, which we also very much appreciated their care in the service.
Overall I was quite satisfied from this stay, minus the initial impression during the arrival process. I recognize the staff warned us about the renovation noise to temper expectation, but perhaps the delivery could be better, and really don't let your guests wait in line for more than 10 minutes if possible. The hotel's hard product is world class and top notch, while the soft product could use some improvement.

St. Regis Singapore

After a bit of a lackluster service at the Marina Bay Sands Hotel, the St. Regis Singapore promptly reminded me why I remain loyal to Marriott properties. As we sit at the individual check-in desk (nice to be sitting down and check-in), Ms. Syikin, the Guest Relations Manager drops by and personnally welcomed us to the hotel. This was our very first time staying at a St. Regis, and immediately we were greeted by her warm welcome.
We were provided a beautiful, classically appointed Caroline Astor Suite. All the blinds were automatic, all the furniture were exotic solid wood, and the living room had a gorgeous view over the area. Our bedroom had a beautiful art adorn above the headboard, and similar to the Ritz, the bathroom had marble throughout all its surfaces, while having a beautifully symmetrical his and her sink. In addition, this is also the first hotel i stayed at where the shower has side jets that provides a nice soft massage during shower. The slight improvement this suite could have would be having some additional universal plugs at the nightstand tables. unfortunately because all the furniture feature set wood types and unique pattern, it would have looked out of place if they replaced those night stand tables with modern appointments.
https://preview.redd.it/nkoe39r1zo2d1.jpg?width=1868&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=df15419129719871a59919c4b24d53fc8f3e0175
https://preview.redd.it/y4qq29r1zo2d1.jpg?width=1868&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c81505d42a26e42b4cb896391793569336ffd770
Although the hotel did not feature an executive lounge, an afternoon refershment for elite member was offered in their Astor Bar. the cheeses offered were absolutely amazing. I especially loved the goat and blue cheese. We also witnessed for the first time, the St. Regis tradition of the sabering ritual, where they took a 2 feet long saber and pop open a champaigne. It was quite a sight to see.
The breakfast at St. Regis Singapore is one of the best breakfast offerings I have had on this long trip, across 9 hotel properties. They had the eastern offerings on the buffet table spanning chinese, indian, and japanese, while the western offerings can be ordered off their menu, all inclusive to the buffet price. Some of the highlights included the Uni Inari sushi, the kaya toast, and the made to order eggs benedicts. Towards the end of our breakfast, Syikin drops by to say hi, and provided us with some beautiful tea blends exclusive to St. Regis Singapore, as well as a luxurious luggage tag that I now adorn on my luggage. Upon our conversation, turns out she knows a few colleagues at the Ritz Carlton Maldives, where we are headed next, and sent them an email to inform our arrival.
I can confidently say that St. Regis Singapore is one of the very best hotels I have ever stayed at. We truly appreciated Ms. Syikin's attentiveness to her brand loyalists, and look forward to return to the hotel in the near future.

Ritz Carlton Fari Islands Maldives

The Ritz Carlton Maldives is the pinnacle of our hotel stays to date. Coming in with a hefty price tag, this resort has an unparalleled hard product, and top notch service. The experience starts as soon as we landed in Male. The Ritz is one of a few luxury resorts in the Maldives that doesn't have its own dedicated arrival lounge in the airport, so they took us to a restaurant that we were able to order anything off the menu with them taking care of the bill. However, it took us a while before we were greeted onto the vessel as they had some issues with their standard high speed boat. So as a trade for our inconvenience, we were greeted by a beautiful yacht that took 85 minutes instead of the standard 45 minutes to reach the resort. I have heard a lot of other reviews regarding the high speed boat not being the most comfortable vessel and some guests got sea sick. This yacht was nicely appointed and had onboard wifi. We also headed to the upper deck and enjoyed the view. Generally it was a very comfortable ride and we definitely travelled in style to the resort. Onboard the yacht, the staff provided a beautiful snack box and would be refilled on demand, not that we could eat anymore given we just had multiple meals in the airport lounge, on the plane, and now on the yacht.
Our Aris Meeha (personal butler) Shuhu, greeted us at the arrival jetty, along with the guest experience manager. Shuhu drove us with a buggy, while leaving all of our luggage behind for the bell service to take care of. Each and every one of our luggage was given a beautiful Ritz-Carlton Maldives luggage tag, with our room number and details written on there. As we arrive to our villa, we see our personalized bicycles with wooden name plates, and a beautiful sand art made on the bridge to our Villa that welcomes us "home".
We opted for the overwater, 2 bedroom villa. This is by far the best hotel room I have ever had the blessing to stay in. The villa had the best of both worlds in terms of its location. It is located on the main island, with its own lush vegetated private road for added privacy, then a bridge that connects from the end of the island towards the villa itself, which completely sits above the water. With just under 4,000 sqft of total liveable space, the living room and both bedrooms have floor to ceiling windows that can fully open to the deck, which features a full length private pool. To the side of the pool there is a outdoor dining table, 2 full size circular sofa beds, and the ladder access directly into the lagoon.
As a toss up between the Ritz and St. Regis Maldives, I picked the Ritz for its newer villa in exchange for a lack of established coral reef. To my pleasant surprise, because of the way this particular villa is situated off the island, there are quite a bit of established reef to the side of the island, meaning I had some of the best snorkeling just outside of my own villa. It was also quite a delight to snorkel under the villa and its connecting bridge to the island while chasing fishes, adding some terrain variety.
The villa itself is well appointed with technology. In addition to the 3 very large screen smart TVs, a Bang & Olufson bluetooth headphone was provided, which I enjoyed using during my stay. The master bedroom's bathroom had a dual interioexterior shower, which we used multiple times a day. Our housekeeper, Arif, also provided us an exquisitely laid out bubble bath for our arrival and a couple days in. It is absolutely heavenly, to have the ability to go snorkeling right outside of our villa, come up and swim in the private pool, walk over for a nice shower, than jump into a bubble bath, every single day during our stay.
https://preview.redd.it/3cxj6x6fzo2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=53f231e4699abeb90f727f7780cd7933c078e14f
https://preview.redd.it/tscksw6fzo2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f5070c288f143bfbcf954d3c375ccdb01772a431
https://preview.redd.it/nzs7xx6fzo2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=560467914e123daf72f2d0cfec6659b6e10fff34
https://preview.redd.it/u9rtcw6fzo2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1f40c3d70196d265a15bf69464b45291c2d024a4
Speaking of Arif, he was perhaps the most detail orientated housekeeper we have ever encountered. I had some pollen allergy when I arrived on the island. Arif came by the second day with extra tissue boxes for my comfort. He also noticed we like our water cold, so he cleared the mini bar fridge (which was all included except for alcohol), and placed all of the supplied water in the fridge for us. As a part of the stay, many snacks are provided in the villa, which he would refill twice a day if consumed.
We were invited to a couple elite member appreciation reception. There were quite a bit of drinks and fancy appetizers served, including caviar on smoke salmon. During this event a few restaurants and food selections were recommended to us, which we tried later. Some of the highlights included the In-Villa-Dining's Veal Cheek Soup, and the waffle during breakfast. The former had some of the most tender beef I've ever had in a Taiwanese style beef noodle soup, while the latter was literally the best waffle I've ever had, it was soft and fluffy on the inside, while featuring an extremely thin, and not overly crispy outer shell. The breakfast buffet had a healthy amount of selection, although not the most elaborate I've ever seen, but has a Chinese noodle soup station, and an Indian masala dosa station, with made to order western eggs and desserts varieties. Some of the highlights for me included the lobster chilli omelette, the really authentic chicken noodle soup, the waffles, and the Shakshuka (a middle eastern dish that has spices, bell peppers and sunny side up eggs).
There are quite a number of premium restaurants on site. We tried the tum tum food truck which featured Taiwanese style gua bao with fancy fillings such as lobsters or softshell crabs, and Arabesque which featured indian and middle eastern style cuisines. At Arabesque, we had a lightly battered, spice blended, Egyptian seafood platter, which featured freshly caught local fish, and the largest prawn I've ever seen in my life. The minced lamb wrap was also very delicious. These 2 restaurants are located in a nearby island with another resort, which has regularly scheduled ferries servicing between it and the Ritz island.
The highlight of our culinary delight on the resort however, had to go to Summer Pavilion. This restaurant's food is at a Michelin Star level. Our server, Eliza, took great care of me. I went to the restaurant alone, while my wife stayed in the Villa, a bit under the weather. Shuhu passed on this information to Eliza, and I planned to pack half of my food back for my wife. Eliza added a chicken noodle soup to the order considering my wife's wellness. I've never seen such care in a Michelin stars restaurant, let alone a regular restaurant. I had the privilege to try out 3 dishes, the Lobster Rice Soup, the Crab Fried Rice, and the Chilli Oil Prim Rib. The first dish was creative yet not pretentious, while the 2 latter dishes are the best variation I've ever had. After the meal, instead of me carrying the takeout back to the villa, the restaurant prepared dedicated room service and delivered the food to us.
I tried out the Signature Spa package at the resort, a 180 minute experience that did not come cheap. It was an amazing massage with a full steam sauna, coconut bath, dry sauna, and coconut scrub treatment. Very relaxing, but had 3 showers as a part of the experience, which I thought could probably do with one less, and I thought the value proposition isn't as good as a few other spa I have visited around the world.
As we depart the resort, we were treated to a completely different yacht, leaving yet again in style. Once we arrived at the airport, the Ritz staff took care of our luggage all the way till the flight check-in, without us needing to lift a finger. He even came with us through the primary security screening to further help us with our luggage. In the end, I look back to this particular resort with fond memories, and the legendary services provided by the staff like Shuhu, Arif, and Eliza. However, as we are not so used to such an attentive service in our travel, it was a bit overwhelming at first. I think Shuhu quickly noticed our style and was able to adapt. I think it may be worthwhile for the Aris Meeha to ask the guests initially what their service interval/intensity preferences are, to further tailor to their liking. We also felt there was a bit of sale pressure from the staff regarding restaurant bookings, spa product offerings, excursion bookings and such. Maybe they were just trying to be helpful as those things would be what fill an itinenary in a Maldives resort island.
Finally, I think it would not be a fair review without talking about the value proposition at this resort. This is the best hotel property we have ever stayed at in our entire life. The service, the villa, and the facilities are all world class, and I've had some of the best meals of my life at this resort. Considering it is literally in the middle of the Indian ocean, thousands of miles from major culture centres, it is nothing short of a feat to have such high quality, international cuisines all available at this resort. But other than the meal at the Summer Pavilion, I still have a bit of internal challenge justifying spending $50 USD on a personal sized pizza, $480 USD on a spa treatment, or $2,000 USD on the yacht rides to and from the airport.
Bottomline is, the Ritz-Carlton Maldives is the best hotel I have ever stayed in my life. Although a bit overpriced in some regards, the service and attention to details of the staff, the design and appointments of the villa, and the world class facilities and location together made memories that we will never forget.

Grand Sheraton Dubai

Exchanging the beach for the desert, we head into Sheraton Grand in Dubai. Upon our arrival around 3pm, the front desk invited us to the executive lounge first while preparing an upgraded Deluxe Suite for us. We enjoyed the afternoon tea in the lounge, which consisted of many sweet and savory selections. Amongst the many choices, the shrimp with caviar was my favorite.
Upon entering the suite, we were provided with a beautiful spread of towel art to celebrate our anniversary. A nice card and a cake was also provided. The suite itself had a gorgeous view over this cool looking, seesaw like tower, as well as the trade centre roundabout, which I quickly dubbed "the roundabout from hell". Nevertheless, we absolutely loved the metropolis view this suite provided, given we just spent a week in front of the beach. The hotel offered complementary valet service, which was a godsend for us as we rented a car during our stay.
https://preview.redd.it/teu73t3d0p2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c9ce05f8eaf90cb0dce11658678af91fc0e0fe3e
The breakfast spread at the restaurant Feast is really impressive, essentially featuring all the international dishes we grew accustomed from our time in the Maldives. Surprisingly, one of my favorite dishes from this huge selection was the seemingly unassuming hashbrown. It is really crispy and light, compared to some other buffets that sometimes have it soggy as it sits in the hot plate. Another highlight is its really thick and fluffy french toast, it had a generous amount of eggs.
The staff in general are very friendly. We did run into a few small hiccups that the lovely Ms. Shahenda in the executive lounge addressed for us on multiple occasions. Upon check out, Mr. Youssef, the Room Manager, personally greeted us and took notes of the situation, which in turn gives me full confidence future guests will experience the smoothest service this hotel offers. As we are heading to other hotels, Mr. Youssef also sent a personal note to them to coordinate our arrival, which we very much appreciated.

JW Marriott Dubai

For a hotel that has 1600 rooms, JW Marriott Dubai did not disappoint in the service department. As soon as we arrived at the property, valet swiftly opened our doors, unloaded our luggage, provided claim ticket, and escorted us straight to the elite check-in counter. The check-in staff seemed really prepared for our arrival, from recognizing our names, knowing we came from Sheraton Grand, to highlighting our upgrade to the Deluxe Corner Suite with a view to the Burj, and congratulating on our anniversary, elite status, plus the details of the facilities at the hotel, the entire check-in process showed the property is a very well oiled machine in terms of its top notch service.
We were absolutely floored when we checked into our room. Needless to say, the beautiful towel arts, flower petals, and a prepared bubble bath in the luxurious suite already went beyond our expectation, but what blew us away was on the table in the living room, accompanying the chocolates and macaroon was a custom made card, with a photo of us. The team at JW coordinated with our previous stay at the Singapore St. Regis and obtained our photo to put up this surprise for us. In addition to all these extravagance, the team also included a nice JW braided reusable bag on the side.
https://preview.redd.it/8gcs4whi0p2d1.jpg?width=1868&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1df5bc080afb8cc8510ffb611d85ed5602e82081
https://preview.redd.it/j3e1suhi0p2d1.jpg?width=1868&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8ef2a91bfd1cdeef6c36d72c80b22102f9be6311
https://preview.redd.it/319b8whi0p2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1af52d607e9792e2d37a7dd1fae383b33995fb7a
https://preview.redd.it/evqhciii0p2d1.jpg?width=4000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b24335417c7900886d8b2a3e62e48296f1c46105
The club lounge's evening service had amazing food throughout our stay. I loved the laksa from the hot station one night, but the chicken tenders, satay beef, chicken quesadilla and shawarma are all great tasting. Staff at the lounge are very attentive, with the managers personally come over to thank us for our loyalty with Marriott. Furthermore, on our last day, the staff in the lounge collectively brought us another tiramisu cake to enjoy, and congratulated on our anniversary with a signed card.
JW Marriott Dubai stood out amongst all of our recent hotel stays with its over the top service, great food in the club lounge, and beautiful rooms. I cannot recommend this hotel more.

Al Maha, Luxury Collection

After a full week in the metropolis Dubai, we head out to the desert to experience Dubai's another side. Al Maha staff takes good care of us as soon as we arrive, first by valeting our car, unload our luggage, then welcomes us to an isolated room of the main reception for the check in process. We selected our included activities, enjoyed our welcome drinks, then went on our way to our suite.
The suite is unique in the sense that it has a tent-like ceiling, and perhaps the largest oversized king size bed I've ever slept in. Unfortunately the bed although comfortable, is too soft for my personal preference. We loved the chaise in front of the bed for us to sit and take in the view. The bathroom is quite roomy and comfortable. I loved the aesthetic design of the private pool, but there were a lot of bugs inside the pool so we didn't use it at all. It served well as a water source for nearby birds though.
The camel ride was really nice. the guides planned the tour well so by the time we arrived at the spot, the sun is just about to set, and they had a nice reception set up with refreshment and snacks. Back in the reception area during high tea, we tried the camel milk, let's just say it's an aquired taste.
The dining at this property was just out of this world. All the meals we had were amazing, with the dinner under the moonlight, breakfast in the air-conditioned restaurant, and lunch in the suite. Some of my favorites include the Omani Prawn, Al Maha Um Ali, and the Lamb Chops. All 3 locations are extremely romantic, I highly recommend for honeymooners.
Contrary to other reviewers, I personally felt a 1 night stay at Al Maha should suffice, since you really can't do anything outside from 9am to 5pm due to the extreme heat. For most of the day, we stayed in the suite and just relaxed and enjoyed the view, watching the animals come and go. It is a surreal experience to be in the middle of a desert with all the first world luxury available to us.

Summary

We thoroughly enjoyed almost all of our stays at the Marriott properties, and because of that stay at MBS, it further showed how far my elite status were recognized and honoured in all the other properties. What really blew me away was the collaborations between all the properties to make our trip extra special. It almost felt like the hotel staff travelled with us to the next destination. This experience has been so great that I would likely remain loyal to the Marriott brand for many years to come.