Obviously this does not apply to AYITL, where she's lost all sense of resilience and is merely coasting by, but I do mean this in the original series. In 6x02 she's getting cowed and pushed around by her fellow community service members, and in a bad place emotionally as well. In 6x03 she's made friends with them and is helping the girl who she got in a fight with to overcome her smoking addiction and has become someone their supervisor can trust with managing. She had hit rock bottom then through actions that were her own, but she bounced back at least that much and it often goes overlooked. Same with her building a nice camaraderie with the nursing home dance class.
even in Mitchum's internship, which everyone and their mother believes she failed at, (and I do too, at some level), she went from stumbling the first day we saw her to getting the hang of what was given to her (which were clearly errands and administrative tasks) in a matter of two weeks. Like I don't think Rory's has got the spunk and determination to be a reporter out on the field, yes. But she would have done very well for herself as a writer or in any management role, because she is very persuasive and charismatic when she wants to be. She definitely makes for a better leader than Paris ever will, imo.

Hello! Current junior nursing student and a CNA. I recently had the amazing opportunity to shadow a NICU RN but I also got the chance to be apart of the residents and NP/PA/MD discussions as they made their rounds during the day.
I have always wanted to pursue medicine. I love patient interaction and being hands on, while also being able to explain the “why does this happen?” Currently I cannot do much of that while being a student or a CNA since it’s out of my scope of practice but I do enjoy it while being in clinical rotations or sim labs.
Simply to put it short the MD and the amazing neonatology team amazed me! I was already pondering how to further my career after obtaining my BSN but this pushed me a bit further! Is it common for people with BSN to want to suddenly go to med school…? I’ve seen the NP route more commonly but I’d like to hear some stories or suggestions from people who are currently pre-med or anything similar.
I’m sure my speciality I’d like to pursue would be neonatology but just sort of trying to discern what route I’d like to take after obtaining my BSN. These three have crossed my mind (not in any specific order) 1. NP 2.PA 3.MD
Just would love to hear some stories! I’ll be shadowing with the MD I seen when I shadowed with the RN! I want to be prepared while also being able to learn a lot.

You have no doubt seen the earlier post on the PVCC Nursing student, Mustafa Abdelhamid, in the US under asylum status from his home country, who was arrested at the Gaza demonstration and is the only person who still has a No-Tresspassing Order (NTO) from that event. This NTO prohibits him from setting foot on UVA grounds and has already cost him a summer internship, and further threatens the continuation of his nursing studies in the fall. The information released so far does not indicate any reason he would be considered a threat to anyone.
If you are concerned about this case and would like to add your voice to calls for the NTO to be lifted, you can sign the petition at this link:
https://actionnetwork.org/petitions/let-mustafa-nurse/

Hello, I’m a student nurse doing an internship in mental health. I’m in a nursing home, but the patient I have has BPD, narcissistic personality disorder and has neuro/behavioural disorder (TNCM in French, didn’t find the English version). I know it’s not her fault, but psych has always been a fear of mine and I feel like I blew my first day (even tho she doesn’t remember anything). She was rude and only made snarky comments so I didn’t do much interaction with her.
Then I had to do a partial bath (upper body and genitalia) and her attitude threw me off and I lost all of my organization I had. It took me 30 minutes to basically clean her bc she was making me nervous. She only made negative remarks, telling us she’s tired of us “just messing around”, wasting her time, how we should go back to school, etc. Obviously all I say is yes I’ll go back to school, that when I’m done I’ll leave her alone, just saying what she wants to hear to not escalate things. I feel like I’m not taking it personal, but my teacher says it looks like I am. The way I see it, I had a lot of anxiety to start my internship because it’s the first day and mental health has never been an interest and frankly, I never wanted to work in there since I know I wouldn’t be able to deal with this daily. I’m afraid, I know I shouldn’t but I’m afraid and scared. I’m not used to this at all.
I want to do better because honestly, I have 0 positive things imo about my day today, I literally almost cried when I remembered I had to put her tubi grips on after cleaning her. I’m disappointed in myself. What could I do? How can I avoid escalating? How can I keep my focus, stay organized?
PS: I do have trauma from my first internship (the very first day of it) and it was in the same nursing home as this and with elderly people so they do scare me in general. I’m working in that but this patient made me feel like that first day all over again.

Hi... Buckle in because this might be a doozy. Throwaway account.
I'm an RN. I was working at this mental health clinic that does ketamine infusion therapy for mental health diagnoses. When I first started at this clinic, the day to day was staffed by a CRNA, a few RNs, and a nurse aid. My duty as an RN was to start an IV, do an assessment to make sure the patient was appropriate for an infusion that day, and monitoring the patient during the infusion. The CRNA did dosing and set up the pump.
Without going into too much detail, things have changed a lot. I went in last week after awhile off and found that some days, there wasn't a CRNA present, and the provider discussing dosing is one of the clinic providers. That day it was a PMHNP. I was unsure about the safety of that situation because there would be no one present to establish an airway if necessary, but the person who was filling me in reminded me they are a paramedic and can take that role. Ok, cool. Day went by fine without issue. The APRN discussed dosing and I administered the ketamine under the direct supervision of the APRN.
I go in this week and due to a staffing issue, there is no CRNA, no APRN, and no paramedic. I expressed that I felt uncomfortable and questioned the legality of administering IV ketamine without direct supervision (obviously) and without someone available for an advanced airway. Long story short, I ended up essentially walking out because there was pressure from management to start infusions without someone available to directly supervise OR establish an airway. The MD (a psychiatrist) told us we could start because he was there, but I didn't feel great about it because he was performing his job on the clinic side in his office and we were essentially not being directly supervised in the administration. I assume (perhaps wrongly) that he has intubated before, but I don't know when the last time he had experience doing that. I am ACLS trained because of my background in critical care and ER nursing, but I am not sure anyone else was more than BLS trained. I also felt I was risking my license because of how this arrangement looked in reality: essentially, the MD was still taking patients in his capacity doing TMS and clinic visits; on the other half of the clinic, we (the RNs) were expected to do our normal activity, plus discuss dosing w/patients and start the infusions. With the understanding that we're """""technically"""" doing it under MD supervision...
Side note: if things go sideways, protocol is to give Versed or propofol if people have a bad time. When I started, they didn't want RNs giving it because the CRNA was supposed to. So would I be expected to do that? This place is run by a bunch of business people who don't have healthcare experience (are you surprised? -_-)
Was I being overly cautious? I essentially resigned my position and walked out of my shift because of how much my gut/instinct was telling me to run. I don't think it's ethical to be providing ketamine infusion under these circumstances, but I don't know who to report this to or if it's worth reporting. I feel like these clinics are kind of the wild west of medicine right now and if I were a patient, I wouldn't be comfortable with how they were operating.
Any advice on if/how to proceed would be appreciated. I just really felt like not only was patient safety being risked, but quite possibly my license as well :(

Hello everyone,
I was hoping to gain some advice on my situation. I earned my bachelors (BA in Biology) in 2017 with a 3.1 GPA, since I really loved research, I spent a majority of my time in lab and not class, along with some personal stuff that happened, which caused a plethora of withdrawals, bad grades, and overall bad time.
I then ended up going into the biotech industry. During my time there, I took 30+ credits of upper level undergraduate coursework and maintained a >3.9 GPA in those courses. The reason taking additional classes was because I was very interested in pursuing a PhD later and wanted to show graduate schools that my undergraduate performance was an anomaly and did not define me as a student.
After about 4 years in industry, I joined a "very good" PhD program in Biochemistry (I am a second going on third year), although the lab I work in is BioE/synthetic bio (which is ranked "top 10" if that matters). I recently realized that I want to go to medical school more than anything. The reasoning is a very long story and something that I have thought about for an extended period of time. For the sake of brevity in an already long post, I will omit the reasons :).
Of course wanting to go to medical school really stinks since my undergraduate performance is very lackluster, and quite frankly makes me feel disgusted in hindsight. I have used the AMCAS Excel grade calculator spreadsheet and entered all the classes I took:

• AMCAS GPA: 3.43
• AMCAS BCPM: 3.48
• Post-Bacc GPA: 3.85
• Post-Bacc BCPM: 3.93
• Graduate program GPA: 3.75 - 3.8 by the time I am done (two B's really killed me!)

I have not taken the MCAT yet, and know that it will be the ultimate test (no pun intended). But I am worried that even if I score high (which I don't even know what to aim for), I will not be able to overcome my past.
To summarize a long post:

• I am unsure if I will be able to overcome my past undergraduate performance with what I have done
• I am unsure what MCAT would be acceptable to apply with, I am aiming for as high as possible, but unsure what would be something that allows me to gain acceptance
• Unsure if I should finish my PhD or not. I am leaning toward yes since it will probably be a positive on my application. The only downside is that I will probably be around 31 when I finish hehe.
• Not sure what else I should be doing to increase my application chances.

Some additional information of note:

• There was a brief point in my undergrad where I considered nursing, so I have a couple of years of work experience as a Nurse Assistant and Medical Scribe as well as clinical volunteering
• I have been volunteering at my local hospital, will begin shadowing
• I do not care about ranking, MD vs. DO, etc. Just want to get into a US medical school (MD or DO) I am a Texas Resident

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Hey guys, I’m just down in the dumps and was just wondering about how does one person do a change of career. I’m a Nurse assistant in the hospital and for a very long time I wanted to become a nurse but after a while now, I feel like I don’t want to do that anymore. I decided to change and go back to school to get my BSBA in finance. Now, I’m having a hard time trying to get an internship or just any entry level office job. I’ve been applying for years now but I couldn’t get anyone to respond. I’ve changed my resume and everything but even with entry level. I see some jobs what at least 2 years. Could anyone give me some advice. Thank you.

24f. i have BFS symptoms (wide spread twitching, some tingling in arms and finger and arm/leg weakness. nothings gotten worse though, if anything it has improved/ almost resolved in the last year) and my primary doctor referred me to a muscular neurologist 9 MONTHS ago. yeah, it took that long for an appointment lol. well tomorrow is the appointment, and i want to cancel. i’m really embarrassed about this but the twitching does worry me and cause me anxiety. most of my symptoms are gone though. i went to one nurse practitioner last year who was a headache specialist who said the twitching was from stress but i’ve never gone to an MD neurologist about it. i’m also thinking it’s good to establish care so if something worsens i at least have a neuro? ugh any words of encouragement or anyone relate to this??
update: i worked up the courage to go to the appointment and the front desk tells me they CHANGED my appointment last week to a month from now! they unfortunately never relayed that to me… ugh!

I'm an NPC to my husband, a non player character that only exists to further his mission. My wants don't matter. My basic needs don't matter. My purpose is to support him. I have sacrificed SO MUCH. THREE DAYS we were in the PICU, while my 7yr old was on an insulin drip and he abandoned us because he was overwhelmed and instead of looking for divorce lawyers in my intense fury, I looked for solutions because of his Asbergers, so it wouldn't happen again. Even my therapist says it's like I have 3 special needs kids ,instead of just 2. He did jack shit about mothers day and he's says it's my fault because we have no money.
We just talked about the future. I put off my dreams for nursing school when I got pregnant with our oldest, with the understanding that, when we were done and the kids were in school, I could finish my education. Now he's balking. I'm slave, subject to the whims of my family because if i try to go to school withput his approval, if I try to get student loans, even for the local CC I plan on going to, he'll just resent me and bring it up everytime he disagrees with me about anything.
It doesn't matter that I have sacrificed EVERYTHING for our family and to help him achieve HIS career goals. Only HIS wants matter, not me and my needs. Please don't talk about abuse or divorce. I'm trapped. I can't leave even if I wanted to.
All I want is a thank you from him. Just an acknowledgement that what I do isn't easy. For MD, all I asked for was a specific cookbook, the one from the Pasta Queen. Not even for me, but for him and the kids because he LOVES Italian food and our youngest loves pasta and has ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder) and pasta is a safe food, so I can use it to expand his eating habits. Instead I got nothing and was told it was my fault.
Is it so wrong to just want some appreciation? To want to see my dreams come to fruition because I've held up my end of the bargain? I just want to matter to him as much as he matters to himself.

I was diagnosed of drug induced psychosis last year. Got clean and took my medications. I stopped hearing voices but then I developed a bad side effect called Eye dystonia (which is continuous or intermittent muscle contractions which cause abnormal, often painful, repetitive movements in the eye/s) for me it was both eyes and I was a nursing student so I had to also go for my internship. This affected my attendance severely. My psychiatrist refused to change my antipsychotics but she prescribed something for the dystonia. It got worse so I just stopped taking any of my medicines. And all side effects stopped. It being like 5 months since I last took my medicine. Now this is where my problem comes in, I have been feeling really paranoid lately. I don't know if my delusions are coming back (I really hope not, I need to graduate next month 😞) but I don't have any hallucinations. What do you guys think I should do??
N.b: I've started drinking beer (like 1 bottle in a day)

So I initially graduated with an ASN in May of 2020. My GPA was a meager 2.9, which especially took a hit during my nursing courses. I chalk this up to many things including depression and disappointment in myself for getting "stuck" in a major I never wanted in the first place. Regardless, I graduated, became a med-surg nurse, and I went on to obtain my BSN through an online program, which I graduated with a 4.0 bringing my cumulative GPA up to a 3.367. I learned to love my career as a nurse after switching specialties and working in the ICU. I currently work in a large hospital in a large American city where I aid in postop liver transplant care, I run CRRT, and deal with all the craziness that an ICU brings.
This is where my desire to become a doctor found its rebirth. I work with Intensivists that are brilliant physicians, coworkers, and all-around super encouraging people. A few of them had a nontraditional backgrounds in obtaining their education, and fully support my desire for career change. I learned about PostBacc programs recently, and I thought that this was the most straightforward path for me to bolster my medical school application. Upon further research, however, I see that many PostBacc programs have prerequisites, and it might be more ideal for me to focus on my prerequisites for medical school independently.
I have considered some of the online medical school advisors such as "Med School Insiders," but they have quite the price tag on them. While I may still reach out to advisors such as these, I wish to use their paid services as specifically as I can, rather than receiving broad information from them.
I have taken genetics, two courses of Anatomy & Physiology with lab (non-nurse specific), intro psychology, intro to microbiology, statistics, and a freshman level chemistry which I unfortunately received a C in, and so I plan to start fresh with my chemistries.
I will need inorganic chemistry, organic chem, probably more biology, and physics for sure. I will also need to prepare for the MCAT which I may do through a program.
Question 1: Where could I find someone to overlook my resume/transcript and advise me on the best course of action?
Question 2: Are those online medical school advisors worth the money (350/hr)?
Question 3: Can I take the courses needed at a community college or would it be better to take them at a university with a medical program that I am interested in? If the class does not require a lab, can I take the prerequisites needed online, or do in-person courses hold more merit for the credits I need?
Question 4: Can any RN, BSN to MD/DO speak on how long it took to knock out your prerequisites and MCAT? I plan on being a full-time student.
I am 26 and wish to get the ball rolling on my journey as soon as possible, so if I can take courses starting in August that would be great. Any information would be greatly appreciated!! Apologies for the repetitive topic, I just could not find a post that quite answered my questions in totality. Thanks again.

Hello all,
I finished my IT degree a year ago in August 2023. I have IT work experience and an internship and I cannot even so much is find a basic helpdesk job in my area. What do I do? I do not even feel like certs will help me at this point and I am too low IQ to code.
I switched to IT in college because I’m too stupid to become a doctor and at the same time I debate as to whether this industry is kind of a scam or not. I am debating on going back to school to try again but it is too damn risky. Not to mention every other field of medicine is over saturated to high hell AND has a horrible debt to income ratio, save for nursing but that’s a hellish line of work that people who I know work in it tell me to avoid. I feel stuck and do not know where to go.
What can I do to get out of this hellish situation? I am 23 (feels like I turned 23 yesterday) and am about to turn 24 this summer and I feel like jumping from a bridge. Everyone I know is making money, driving nice cars, and getting engaged/GFs. I feel scammed and cheated by this industry, the job market, and life in general. I’ve lost all hope in attaining upper middle class status. My life feels like a movie stuck in pause.
One thing that is non-negotiable is leaving my folks’ home/my area. Can’t do it.

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Hello! I am seeking advice on my next steps to reach the md/phd status. Back story;
I am first-generation college student and when I arrived to college, at a big research institution mid-pandemic. I felt very lost, I experienced a lot of discrimination and discomfort being the only Black student in my classes, especially my labs. It was very daunting and I hated it. I lost focus on the end goal of going into medicine so I switched and started focusing on getting my PhD in public health because I thought it was “the easy way out”. Started gaining more research experience and had a family member unexpectedly pass away. This made my mental health suffer more, I was burned out, and mostly felt like I was still not on the right path. However, I managed to study abroad for 3 weeks in a low developing country and shadowed at a local hospital… I LOVED IT!! Like I loved it so much I told my advisor when I came back I wanted to do peace or global health corps at a hospital. I started interning in health behavior related work at a 9-5, I was supposed to get my MPH in this topic, realized I did not like this at all. I want to focus more on global health epidemiology/population health sciences while working with patients in-clinic. In addition, I have thought about going into l the biotech industry as well.
Now I have graduated and am taking a growth year, I am really leaning into going back to take my prereqs at a 4 year. Since I didn’t get to shadow a doctor until my fourth year of college, this definitely had a major impact on my life versus me having the ability to do it sooner. I am beginning to reach out to some people in my mentors network and I plan to shadow at least 3 md/phds this summer.
However, I had a full ride to college and I cannot afford to take classes at my local 4 year university. Should I reach out to the department head to see if there are any scholarships available or jobs that can give me education credits? Should I do a “self- design” postbacc at my local HBCU or CC? What recommendations do you have for my next steps to be?
Stats now; - 3.8x GPA - 2 competitive research internships at an ivy league - pending FA publication - about 1000-2000 research hours ?? I haven’t calculated but i’ve been doing research for the past 4 years - still planning to get my masters for more research experience
Thank you in advance for any advice you’re willing to share!! I really appreciate as it has been so hard navigating this path as a first-gen.

I don’t know if this is the right forum for this. I mostly just need to vent and get stuff off my chest. I feel like my life has fallen apart completely since I was diagnosed in January. I had an orchiectomy shortly after my diagnosis. Had 1x BEP as a preventative. And I thought life would go back to normal. It has been one nightmare after another since I made it home in February. First , I know my wife doesn’t handle stress well. She panics easily, and I knew it would be hard on her even if everything went perfectly. But I expected her to keep it together for my sake. I mean, I’m the one who had to come to grips with my mortality. For background, my wife is an attorney. I own my own business. We live in a rural area but because of her job she has to travel to a larger city about 3 hrs away a couple times per month. On average she’s home 70% of the time. We have 2 little boys. I do probably 85% of the child care, which I don’t mind at all. I love my boys more than anything and will do whatever it takes to make sure they have a great life. Outside of one or two fights about her not being “mom” when she gets home sometimes, it really hasn’t been a bad situation. I thought we were happy. My boys are happy. Then the C word. After feeling something off for a month or so, I sought out a urologist and got the necessary testing. Got diagnosed and scheduled my surgery. Did all of this alone because she was busy. I didn’t mind. I don’t resent her for that. We didn’t even think it was gonna be cancer. The day of my surgery, instead of being supportive she’s pissed. I picked the wrong doctor or something. Should’ve consulted her (I did but she never would tell me where she wanted me to go). Blah blah blah. Was not nice to me at all while I was recovering. Couldn’t even look at me and didn’t want to sleep in the same room. When I was well enough, I confronted her. It turned into a huge fight, but lead to her opening up about her fear of losing me, having to raise our boys alone, not being able to have more children. Stuff I feel like I’d pretty normal to think about and have to work through. Things got better after that for a few days. She started being nicer at least. She started going with me to appointments at MD Anderson. We got our treatment plan and set everything up. The day I went into the hospital to start chemo, she was a train wreck. Couldn’t even watch them start my IV. Had a panic attack. Had to get in touch with her psych and he prescribed some medication to calm her down. It was so bad the nurses tried to get her to go see the therapist on staff. She got a little better after the first 2 days but it was rough. By the time I got out she seemed okay. Much more loving and supportive and I thought we were through the worst of it. I have to back up for a second or the next part won’t make sense. And my timeline may be a little off because so much was going on. At some point during all of this, we found out our chimney in the house had been leaking into our sunken living room floor, which had been covered before we bought the house. The floors were peeling up and the wood underneath were rotting. So back to the story. We decided we would replace the flooring in the whole house (it all matched before) and fill the sunken living room with concrete. Knowing we’d have to move out for a week or so for this to happen, my wife looked at it as an opportunity to remodel. Okay. Our bathrooms did need it. Both tubs had big cracks and we’d been talking about that anyway. This turned into ripping the walls out down to the studs. A 2 week project turned into a 2 month project and $10k turned into $80k. Our first contractor lied to us and for a solid week no one came to work. When they did the work was terrible. We fired him a month in. Hired another who is awesome but is mostly a one man show. His work is great though. My wife developed a friendship with our electrician. To his credit, he’s also good with wood working. They started bouncing ideas off each other and the house started coming together. My wife stopped working for a while. She started spending every waking moment at the house. Our electrician is also spending all of his free time at the house. You can see where this is going. My wife starts drinking more. She said it helps her paint and pass the time doing all the tedious work. I would come help when I could, but running a business takes up most of your day, and I can’t afford to not sleep. Plus someone has to take care of our boys and get them in bed. My mom helped out a ton. That woman is a saint. One week, my wife has to go to Houston for work. Things seem pretty normal. She calls me when she leaves the office. She goes to dinner by herself. She doesn’t call after. I had fallen asleep and just assumed she’d gone back to her grandmothers and gone to bed too. She doesn’t call the next morning. I assume she’d overslept. She finally calls around lunch crying. She’s been arrested. Didn’t remember anything past going to dinner. Swears she only had a glass of wine. Blah blah blah. Okay. I’m very concerned. She tries to convince everyone she was drugged but her story doesn’t add up at all. I’ll spare the details. I go down to be with her for her arraignment. She gets a really good lawyer and gets off taking a better decision making class. Cool. All is fine. She is very loving. We talk about our marriage and our family. She promises to quit drinking. She’s done working on the house. I bring up my concerns. She completely agrees. Things are great for about 24 hrs. Suddenly she needs to be back at the house. The contractor has questions. He doesn’t but you see where I’m going. Electrician is there. All the time. They are together a lot. Not usually alone but sometimes. I catch her pouring a drink. She says she’s not going to drink it. Blah blah blah. By this point I’m trying to be there as much as possible. She’s had a rough patch. I get it. I’m trying to be a good husband. Thursday night I go with her to work on the house. Tell her we need to leave by 9 to get some sleep. She’s cool. 9 rolls around an I say it’s time. She gets pissy but finally agrees. Friday I don’t want to work on the house at all. I go to work like normal. Oldest son goes with me since he’s out of school. She ends up getting our other son from daycare in the afternoon. She’s there all day “working”. We had plans to go see my dad. Laundry needs to be done and bags need to be packed. I tell her I’ll do it. I pick her up for dinner and then drop her off. She says she’ll leave in a little while and tells us she loves us. I wake up at 3:30am. She’s not there. Call her phone and get sent straight to voicemail twice. I wake my mom up and tell her I need her listen for the boys. I jump in the car and head straight for the house. Electricians tuck is there. I storm inside. All the lights are off. I hear stumbling in the dark. Find my wife trying to get up from the floor. She’s fully clothed. Electrician is in a different room and passed out. Also clothed. I come unglued. Smell her breath and immediately know she’s hammered. Huge fight ensues. She tells me she hates me and everything is my fault. Punches me in the face. I get her back to my mom’s and she passes out in the bed. I go through her phone. No signs of a physical affair but emotional for sure. I text the electrician to get his stuff out of the house and he’s done working for us text his wife and let her know how I found them. Pack up the car before she wakes up. Get the kids dressed and ready. Then I wake her up and tell her we’re leaving. Tell her I blew it all up and to have fun. Call her dad and tell him what’s going on and that I think she needs help. I tell him where I’m going with the boys. Last I heard he went and got her and took her back to Houston. I’m still at my dad’s. Have to drive into Houston tomorrow for my first CT scan post chemo and to meet with my oncologist. Happy times

I just unfollowed nurse blake because he’s getting cringy day by day. There was a point that i enjoyed nurse influencer skits where they make funny scenarios about patient to nurse or nurse to nurse or nurse to MD interactions.
But these influencers from starting like last year are sporadic and CRINGY (yeah uppercase cringy). Like dude how do you even pull up your phone in the middle of the shift and film yourself crying because you lost your patient which is probably not your fault because the patient is really sick and there’s nothing you can do about it.
Plus, what if current/past patients see these “skits”? I mean, yeah it’s funny for us but would they be thinking the same? Like, they would feel bad pressing that call button bc apparently nurses hate it?
I dunno, i’m just probably getting old (31) and starting to hate these influencers because they make more money than me 😂😂😂 jk.
but fr, what are your thoughts about this?

Hi Reddit, I've been feeling a bit lost and distraught recently and want the input of people in the area that I've been considering. I'm sorry that this will be so long, TLDR at the bottom
To give some backround: I turned 22 recently, I'm graduating with an A.S in a completely different field from nursing very soon (Environmental Science) and I've realized after nearing the end of my degree that what I'm currently doing is not what I wanted at all.
I chose this major after being duel-enrolled in high school doing random gen-ed courses with no major declared because I was offered free college instead of graduating early. Most of those duel enrollment classes didn't really amount to anything, but I don't regret making that choice.
I chose my major because I felt pressured to. My family expected me to go into college straight out of highschool with little time to ponder on what I wanted to do, and I eventually sat down with my mom and we scrolled through the lists of majors until I eventually saw the environmental science one and decided "I guess I'll do that" At the time, my vision was actually being out there, talking with people, planting trees and helping the environment directly. Helping fight climate change, pulling ducks out of oil spills, getting plastic waste off of turtles and releasing them out into the wild so that they could live on happily. I just wanted to interact with people and make a real difference, or at least that's what I had in mind.
Fast forward, and I've realized that my degree just isn't that at all. It's mostly OSHA standards, industrial hygiene, hazardous waste cleanup/removal, things like that. There is almost no conservation at all, and after speaking with a professor that I've come to know rather well over my studies, he sympathized for me and said that most students who do the program end up feeling the same way that I do by the end. So now I feel like I'm in a panic; I took my time doing this degree and also took some time off of college due to personal reasons, which now I also feel like was a mistake. My parents got divorced, father moved back home over-seas and a variety of other personal issues made it so that I needed a year off to stay sane. If I kept going I would have been in a terrible place mentally, and I really wanted to prioritize good grades. Currently I have a 3.8GPA so at least I succeeded there I think.
I am in a relationship with the woman I plan to marry and she is legally disabled with severe fibromyalgia and some spinal problems. For most of her life, she has lived a terrible existence where her family didn't believe her despite being diagnosed and didn't support her almost at all, leaving her in pain and bedridden for many years of her life. Things have changed now, but I want to be able to support her and make sure she never lives that life of constant pain with no help ever again, so I want to have a stable job so that I can always ensure the myself and her are safe and happy.
I started looking into careers and I realized that I think Nursing might be for me. I just want to interact with people, have a positive impact on someone or something, and I've always been interested in the medical field. When I was younger, I thought being a doctor would be so cool, but I felt like I was too stupid to be a doctor because everyone I knew talked about how hard it was and that most people cannot do it. Academically, despite being in advanced courses, I always felt stupid and doubted myself ever being successful because of the things I heard around me, so anything medical was out of the picture immediately. I also had the idea in my head that everyone in the medical field was a doctor, I just didn't know better.
I completely went down the rabbit hole, and I was so excited. I spent the past few weeks reading non stop about nursing, and I felt a sense of excitement (or a "fire?") that I never, ever did with environmental science. My plan was to hopefully become a Psych Nurse, and then maybe one day become a PMHNP. Mental health has always fascinated me, as my dad struggled with some pretty serious mental health issues, and I have too. The way I see it is that as a species we are winning on all fronts of medicine except for mental health where we are tragically losing. I feel like being a Psych nurse sounds so interesting, I get to help people and interact with patients, be in the medical field which always fascinated me when I was younger, and there's a pipeline to a higher education. Not to mention the job security and decent pay, which are bonuses.
Then, one day while reading around I talked with some people and came across a subreddit called Noctors and I feel like a lot of my excitement died off. I read so many things that spoke negatively towards NPs and some of it was about nurses in general. My general sentiment went from being super excited to feeling like I would be out of a job in a few years, worthless and a mockery of a physician if I tried to become a PMHNP. This lead me down the line of thought over how maybe I should just try and persue becoming an MD or something. I went down that rabbit hole too but I could never afford medical school and I feel like I am not smart enough to go honestly. Not only that, but spending SO MANY years in school, especially with how stressful it is, would go against my goals of making sure myself and my girlfriend are stable and happy in the short term. As motivated as I feel right now, I don't know if spending the next 10+ years in school with next to no income would be possible for me...
Could I get some thoughts? Are NPs/Nurses really looked down upon in the way that it seems? It didnt even sound like my family was very excited over the thought of both becoming a nurse or a physician, and I feel so discouraged after being so excited.

TL:DR I'm 22, realized I hate my current major and wanted to go into psych nursing, eventually to become a PMHNP. Felt super motivated and excited in a way I never did with my previous major, but after seeing some things online I am second guessing myself and wondering if it's even worth it if I'm not trying to become a physician, which might be really hard given my life's circumstances.

Any advice is much appreciated and I will respond to any comments. Thank you for taking the time to read everything.

I, 22F college art student have been having a really rough time as of the moment. Admitted at the hospital last week because I told my psychiatrist that I planned to kill myself after for a few hours when we met. Finding out that my grandma’s kids aka my father’s siblings signing her DNR papers and later died yesterday. Planning to cut ties with my “close friends” because none of them reached out when I told them I was at the hospital. All of this was happening during my finals week which takes place for three weeks, finals being given, production time, and the date of when we pass our works. It still on going but I don’t have the energy to continue anymore because after this week I have to attend my internship.
It all started when my finals was starting and I already broke down multiple times before that week came and during on the start of my finals, I had to complete one of my art projects that consisted me animating, editing the video, and completing for a span of one week so I can get exempted to my finals. It took all my sanity, sleep, and my will to live. I tried being reasonable to my friends at that time why I would do it with all that sacrifice and effort because all I wanted was to have a lesser problem during my finals because I already knew that it would take a toll on me. Pessimistic view, sure but I was being realistic with the scope of my abilities. As from the past I always had difficulty managing myself because I already have 4 mental disorders including bipolar disorder, major depression disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, and ptsd.
Weekend comes, I was exhausted as heck as my body was running on little to no sleep and I told my dad that I wanted to go to a laptop repair shop to clean my fans as my laptop was already overheating. On our way there we stopped by to a coffee shop and without thinking, I bought a large hot chocolate drink which worsened my palpitations throughout the whole day. When we came home, I started to feel worse, it was hard for me to move and I was telling my friends that which one of them told me to call someone. So I called my older sister who is a nurse. I was having convulsions as my body was trying to cope with the pain and it lasted for about an hour and contacted my psychiatrist that maybe it was the effect of me not taking my medications for 2 days. She watched over for an hour and after that I felt a bit better and was able to move a bit and was able to talk to my friends when.
During the time while making my video art project, I received the news that me and my research partner was first to present defending our research to one of the harsh professors in our university. I panicked, naturally but then my friend also panicked and explained they panicked because as of me panicking over something reasonable and understandable to panic to. They explained why they panicked but did not seem to understand why at that moment why I panicked because instead of understanding why, they told me that my panic exploded their brain to malfunction in a sort of way leading to an awkward situation. We were playing a genshin at that time, they continued explaining why and I just said “then I won’t do it in front of you then” and they responded “I am not into suppression and my mom did that to me” which made me silent after that because I was already too exhausted navigating the situation. We apologized to each other but the voice chat became silent and I was just talking to our other friend about something else.
Monday came and I had to go to my therapy appointment. That morning I was already planning suicide notes to my loved ones and friends, videos, and my will. I asked my older sister to go my favorite sushi place, as she was accompanying me to go to my appointment. As I wanted to spend my last day with a loved one. The appointment came and I told my psychiatrist that I am so tired and my body was already giving out and confessed to my psychiatrist that I wanted to kill myself later tonight. He told me to get myself admitted as where the hospital that we were in and he reserved a room for me. So I did, my family didn’t know the real reason why so we just said that my situation was already getting severe. I told my friends, my classmates, my professors the reason that me and my psychiatrist only disclose.
Everyone gave me well wishes except my friends they ignored my message and i just shrugged it off and said maybe they are just busy working. For a week, I waited for one of them to reach out until I got fed up and contacted my best friend at that time who is in the same group and I told them the real reason and why. They understood and asked since when I was feeling this I stated “since at the start of the year” and they responded “you didn’t have a proper venting system” and had a good conversation and I invited them to visit me at the hospital which they told me that they can this friday. And told me that we can play minecraft when I am free. I waited until friday. I asked if their coming which they told me that work has been hitting them hard and I asked for this weekend and they responded that they couldn’t because of family time and they had to accompany their mom to the hospital. Saturday came, the afternoon I saw them in a discord call with our other friends playing. “Busy” they say, I felt betrayed and got really angry because I needed someone from one of my friends to visit me because it was getting really lonely when I couldn’t talk to my family about the real reason why I was at the hospital. My psychiatrist told me to drop them but I couldn’t until I get a valid reason from my friends why they did those actions.
I contacted two of my friends and asked me how I was at the hospital. Funny that I was the one who reached out. i asked my first friend if I could tell them why I was at the hospital in the first place, I warned them I asked them if they could handle it from the gravity of it. In why they responded that they got triggered and explained they frustration of no filters or TW but I warned them just not how they wanted to be. I apologized and told them that it was already hard for me to comply to those because I was still recovering as I was still at my hospital stay but continued on how they got triggered and lectured me about boundaries and to adhere to the discord server rules and to “let my behavior slide” at this time because I was still recovering. I responded and I apologized again for my actions and was about to ask why no one in our friend group responded/reacted that I was at the hospital but hesitated and told them that is a story for another time. Which they responded “commit to it, we’ve talked about this”. I was already inactive to my discord account and was too exhausted trying to converse with this friend. I talked to my other friend who was the one who told me that they were going to visit me and the one who I have a big art commission that has been going for 3 years that cost around 400 dollars and for many pauses because of life circumstances and was friends for 3 years, told me that they are too mentally unstable to converse with me and only reply to my messages when they can and they deal with their mental sate their own way. I understood but how they said it was harsh and wasn’t helping because I was already at the brink of crying of sadness.
Now, I have so much mixed feelings towards them and giving a thought of cutting them off by my psychiatrist, other friends, my older sister who I told the real reason because she already suspected it and promised not to tell our parents. One of the reasons why I didn’t hurt myself was the hourly checks, talk with my psychiatrist and his residents, my friend from thousands of kilometers away to keep me afloat and keep me from not doing my suicide plan again, my dad who pinky promised that he will be always be there for me, my friend who just had their mother passed away telling me to not do anything stupid because they couldn’t take another grief this year.
My situations right now is so complicated that I don’t know what to do and so exhausted to deal with.

I, 22F college art student have been having a really rough time as of the moment. Admitted at the hospital last week because I told my psychiatrist that I planned to kill myself after for a few hours when we met. Finding out that my grandma’s kids aka my father’s siblings signing her DNR papers and later died yesterday. Planning to cut ties with my “close friends” because none of them reached out when I told them I was at the hospital. All of this was happening during my finals week which takes place for three weeks, finals being given, production time, and the date of when we pass our works. It still on going but I don’t have the energy to continue anymore because after this week I have to attend my internship.
It all started when my finals was starting and I already broke down multiple times before that week came and during on the start of my finals, I had to complete one of my art projects that consisted me animating, editing the video, and completing for a span of one week so I can get exempted to my finals. It took all my sanity, sleep, and my will to live. I tried being reasonable to my friends at that time why I would do it with all that sacrifice and effort because all I wanted was to have a lesser problem during my finals because I already knew that it would take a toll on me. Pessimistic view, sure but I was being realistic with the scope of my abilities. As from the past I always had difficulty managing myself because I already have 4 mental disorders including bipolar disorder, major depression disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, and ptsd.
Weekend comes, I was exhausted as heck as my body was running on little to no sleep and I told my dad that I wanted to go to a laptop repair shop to clean my fans as my laptop was already overheating. On our way there we stopped by to a coffee shop and without thinking, I bought a large hot chocolate drink which worsened my palpitations throughout the whole day. When we came home, I started to feel worse, it was hard for me to move and I was telling my friends that which one of them told me to call someone. So I called my older sister who is a nurse. I was having convulsions as my body was trying to cope with the pain and it lasted for about an hour and contacted my psychiatrist that maybe it was the effect of me not taking my medications for 2 days. She watched over for an hour and after that I felt a bit better and was able to move a bit and was able to talk to my friends when.
During the time while making my video art project, I received the news that me and my research partner was first to present defending our research to one of the harsh professors in our university. I panicked, naturally but then my friend also panicked and explained they panicked because as of me panicking over something reasonable and understandable to panic to. They explained why they panicked but did not seem to understand why at that moment why I panicked because instead of understanding why, they told me that my panic exploded their brain to malfunction in a sort of way leading to an awkward situation. We were playing a genshin at that time, they continued explaining why and I just said “then I won’t do it in front of you then” and they responded “I am not into suppression and my mom did that to me” which made me silent after that because I was already too exhausted navigating the situation. We apologized to each other but the voice chat became silent and I was just talking to our other friend about something else.
Monday came and I had to go to my therapy appointment. That morning I was already planning suicide notes to my loved ones and friends, videos, and my will. I asked my older sister to go my favorite sushi place, as she was accompanying me to go to my appointment. As I wanted to spend my last day with a loved one. The appointment came and I told my psychiatrist that I am so tired and my body was already giving out and confessed to my psychiatrist that I wanted to kill myself later tonight. He told me to get myself admitted as where the hospital that we were in and he reserved a room for me. So I did, my family didn’t know the real reason why so we just said that my situation was already getting severe. I told my friends, my classmates, my professors the reason that me and my psychiatrist only disclose.
Everyone gave me well wishes except my friends they ignored my message and i just shrugged it off and said maybe they are just busy working. For a week, I waited for one of them to reach out until I got fed up and contacted my best friend at that time who is in the same group and I told them the real reason and why. They understood and asked since when I was feeling this I stated “since at the start of the year” and they responded “you didn’t have a proper venting system” and had a good conversation and I invited them to visit me at the hospital which they told me that they can this friday. And told me that we can play minecraft when I am free. I waited until friday. I asked if their coming which they told me that work has been hitting them hard and I asked for this weekend and they responded that they couldn’t because of family time and they had to accompany their mom to the hospital. Saturday came, the afternoon I saw them in a discord call with our other friends playing. “Busy” they say, I felt betrayed and got really angry because I needed someone from one of my friends to visit me because it was getting really lonely when I couldn’t talk to my family about the real reason why I was at the hospital. My psychiatrist told me to drop them but I couldn’t until I get a valid reason from my friends why they did those actions.
I contacted two of my friends and asked me how I was at the hospital. Funny that I was the one who reached out. i asked my first friend if I could tell them why I was at the hospital in the first place, I warned them I asked them if they could handle it from the gravity of it. In why they responded that they got triggered and explained they frustration of no filters or TW but I warned them just not how they wanted to be. I apologized and told them that it was already hard for me to comply to those because I was still recovering as I was still at my hospital stay but continued on how they got triggered and lectured me about boundaries and to adhere to the discord server rules and to “let my behavior slide” at this time because I was still recovering. I responded and I apologized again for my actions and was about to ask why no one in our friend group responded/reacted that I was at the hospital but hesitated and told them that is a story for another time. Which they responded “commit to it, we’ve talked about this”. I was already inactive to my discord account and was too exhausted trying to converse with this friend. I talked to my other friend who was the one who told me that they were going to visit me and the one who I have a big art commission that has been going for 3 years that cost around 400 dollars and for many pauses because of life circumstances and was friends for 3 years, told me that they are too mentally unstable to converse with me and only reply to my messages when they can and they deal with their mental sate their own way. I understood but how they said it was harsh and wasn’t helping because I was already at the brink of crying of sadness.
Now, I have so much mixed feelings towards them and giving a thought of cutting them off by my psychiatrist, other friends, my older sister who I told the real reason because she already suspected it and promised not to tell our parents. One of the reasons why I didn’t hurt myself was the hourly checks, talk with my psychiatrist and his residents, my friend from thousands of kilometers away to keep me afloat and keep me from not doing my suicide plan again, my dad who pinky promised that he will be always be there for me, my friend who just had their mother passed away telling me to not do anything stupid because they couldn’t take another grief this year.
My situations right now is so complicated that I don’t know what to do and so exhausted to deal with.

Can a nurse push a paralytic without md at bedside? Pt is in ARDS. heavily sedated. MD ordered push of paralytic. RN refused to give paralytic without MD present. MD refused to be present stating that we can give it. What does the Illinois scope of practice say? Can someone pull it up? I have pushed plenty paralytics during intubations but with provider at bedside. Never without one at bedside.