I'm gonna try to keep this as short as possible, mainly because I'm not good at talking about my feelings. I (30m) lost my fiance after a car accident in June of '21. She was roughly seven months pregnant with my son, who passed away as well. Her friend was driving, had a seizure while we were on the interstate, and I was in the backseat. I got thrown out of the windshield because I tried to put my arm around my fiance, as I saw the trajectory the car we were in was on (I was sitting directly behind her). I broke 15 bones, including my skull and had a TBI; even had to have slight reconstructive surgery on my face.
After all this happened, I spiraled into a dark place. Was put on pain pills because of my injuries, and ended up progressing to shooting fentanyl to numb my emotions. Ended up getting endocarditis and having a septic embolism, and almost dying again roughly a year and a half after the wreck. Been clean ever since, from Suboxone and everything minus weed sometimes.
Managed to land a good paying job a couple months ago, and things have been going according to plan on that front, but I've battled depression and anhedonic feelings that come in varying levels of severity over the course of these last few years. Haven't attended therapy, or rehab; I've just kinda been trying to figure matters out on my own because, like I stated above, I struggle when it comes to opening up to people about shit that I'm dealing with for some reason or another.
I used to be an extremely extroverted guy, but am pretty much the polar opposite now. Especially with women, and I don't really know why. I feel like I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life, and I feel like I lost the only shot I'll ever have at marrying and starting a family with my best friend.
Not really sure what I'm even trying to accomplish with this post to be totally honest, I just felt the need to try and get this off of my chest because I don't really have anyone else to talk to about it. Any advice or comments would be appreciated.

Hello so first i am a maturidi muslim i learnt about bahaism a few days back and have some questions about the bahai faith
1-is bahaullah's revelation only kitab al-aqdas? ( are his other writings considered revelation of god or his own writing like how muslims differeniate between quran and hadiths?)
2-is abdulbaha's authority of a prophet or wasi of a prophet?
3-was bahaullah infallible in bahai view? What about abdulbaha?
4-what is the status of manifestation of gods are they like the god incarnation/ first(second....) Intellect incarnation or something else? (Like how alawis consider ali (r) as the incarnation of the one , mohammed (saw) the nous, salman (r) the bab)
5-(this might trigger some angry reactions) But why is the language of kitab al aqdas so insufferable (it is like reading an mtl translation of a xianxia novel 😅) considering its claim that it is a revelation of the same god of the quran why isn't the book of the same eloquence no a 10% of the eloquence of the quran?
6-why not use honorifics when addressing prophet (saw) ? Isn't it a law from god? (Surah ahzab ayah 56?)
7-why many hadiths are weirdly quoted by bahaullah? Like some hadiths quoted by him are beyond dai'f (weak) in both sunni and usoli shi'i stantards some other times he quotes hadiths that are literally recorded by ghulati shia without isnad after 700 or so years of the prophet's (saw)/ali's (r) death ?
These are my current questions about the faith, thank you👐🥰

Hello,
I'm really grateful for any help on this. I live in Florida and I am a married and disabled adult. My mom abuses me about disabilities. She offered the gift of moving to one of her units, inherited from my grandma, because we lost our house due to a flood. When we moved here, I lost my job due to being misdiagnosed and eventually discovering stage IV lesions. I've been fighting for my life for 4 years with surgeries but my mom / landlord claims that the money we pay her for rent is invalid because of my belief I am disabled.
She attempted to threat our housing for the past year. Then in April, started telling others we were moving but did not tell us. She promised in May on two different phone calls that my partner and I had on speaker phone to bare witness to, that she was going to evict me in retaliation for placing safe boundaries and his disbelief in my disability effect on earnings (again, we pay her rent and help earn her income with her other units). She then promised not to as I am in a medical emergency, just discovering basically the spread of my lesions. So...after attempting to self evict essentially, we didn't hear from her. When we reached out a few weeks later, she asked to have a meeting (which she did earlier in the month when attempting to extort me through threats of eviction). She texted me a 30 days to vacate notice and has refused to speak to me since. She will only speak to my partner to tell us to contact her attorney to find out our rights. SO here is our question :(
My wife and have lived in an apartment that her mother owns for 5 years. Their relationship has been toxic and volatile for most of this time. We never signed an actual lease, and I pay her a nominal amount every month. She has told us that she wants to help us move out several times over the last few months, and has threatened eviction and taken it back.
We got a 30 day notice to vacate. First, on May 30, she texted my wife a pdf of the letter. The next day, I received the letter in a priority mail envelope with a home printed label, and the day after that she got the same thing. The notice to vacate had a date to leave by June 31st, which is not a real date. There is no case number on the document and it says it was received through certified mail. It is not.
Does this notice have to be through certified mail with a signature? Does the wrong date to vacate make this unenforceable? Can we pay the court for July to appeal the vacate notice? Is there a way to somehow not acknowledge tenancy and say this is a family matter? We are in one of the worst real estate markets in the state and my wife will need life saving surgery for a third time very soon. Should we try to get a lawyer? Is it valid to claim that since there is no proof of a tenant landlord relationship, aside from monthly venmo payments, that there is a mother daughter conflict in terms of the gift? OR what protections are there for people with disabilities from housing retaliation.
This is how I responded to the 30 day to vacate notice. Is any of this worth fighting or is there any way to request simply more time so it doesn't endanger my health more? If we had the money to make this disappear, we would.
"This is how I responded to her lawyer, whose speciality is eviction and ejection. The last conversation I had with my "mom" she agreed to not to use any eviction process.
"I am writing to address the 30-day notice to vacate that you texted me. It is invalid for several reasons: it was not sent by certified mail, the vacate date is incorrect beyond clerical error, and most importantly, it claims we have a month-to-month tenancy, which we do not.
Our relationship is that of mother and daughter, not landlord and tenant.
I am grateful for your gift of this apartment. My last payment to you was in October 2022 to help with building supplies, not for rent.
I would much rather have a loving mother-daughter relationship than be forced to move while physically unable.
On May xx and May xx, you agreed not to force us into new housing. Can we set up a time with your lawyers to provide a document to formalize that agreement? Do you remember us agreeing to formalize our mother-daughter relationship and housing arrangement?
I am also open to discussing a tenancy agreement with your desired terms if you wish to change the terms of the gift. I have already provided the HIPAA-protected information you previously requested as the sole term. Are there other conditions you would like to discuss? Would you like further proof of my disabilities impact on my earnings?
This situation is causing me great distress and is harming my health. I am physically unable to move due to my disabilities. My husband works very hard and does not deserve this. Despite your actions contradicting our agreement, I want to resolve this conflict and rebuild our relationship.
1 in 2 people with endometriosis are suicidal due to the social and family isolation; a friend, died this week from thoracic endometriosis. Let’s have her life be a reminder after so much death of what truly matters as I focus on pulmonary function.
I am committed to repairing our relationship and hope you will consider resolutions to our mother-daughter issues. Are you willing to discuss entering into a formal tenancy agreement with me? If so, what terms would you like to include in such an agreement? For example, would you like to establish a 12-month lease? Or perhaps a 6-month agreement to allow us the necessary time to safely relocate within another housing market we can afford and as a disability accommodation?
I would prefer to continue to have a mother-daughter relationship. Are you open to discussing a compromise, such as allowing us to stay in the apartment for a longer period of time while we search for a new place? Will you commit to not sending any further notices until we speak as a family, with a mediator if you prefer, or have a formal agreement in place? Is it possible to rebuild a way to communicate and see each other?
xx xx is the anniversary of my surgery and Father's Day weekend. [my dad is deceased] I hope we can spend that day celebrating together and move forward and de-escalate collectively. Would you like to start with this? More hurt is the last thing our family needs.
I am very grateful for this gift and would like to better demonstrate it by increasing our contact. I will agree to see you at least once a month and share my protected medical information.I hope we can come to an amicable resolution. Thank you for your time and consideration."

Hello to my favorite sub-reddit! I have a favor to ask of you. My birthday is at the beginning of August, but not long after it's also the first death anniversary of my sweet cat Luna. I still miss her a lot even thou it's been almost a year.
I have a project to do a wall decoration around the picture of Luna with all the cat cards I received from this sub as a sort of commemoration for her. I hope to be able to finish by the time of my birthday. Will you help me in this endeavour by sending me card featuring any sort cat on it?
( If you send a tractor CAT I will laugh and it will go up on the wall with the others 😂)
Ps: I always post thank yous, just not always in a timely fashion 😅

3rd of April 1902
"King Alfred III, The ruler of the kingdom of nordia, had organized, another, ball for showing the Riches of the kingdom.
In the meantime, in the downtown of Elisburgh, the Capital of Nordia, the people couldn't even afford to eat bread
Roland Cross, a 42 years old general who had just won "the southern campaign" to conquer the half desertic lands of Aybil came back to the capital, but the war brought immense cost of lives. Roland, proud of the conquest that he made, went to the king to at least get a medal for the victory. The king knowing of his and in general the royal family unpopularity, decided to put Roland in jail due to (and i Quote) "have spent too many lives of poor Nordish soldiers" and ordered his execution in three days.
The controlled press couldn't obviously say that there were too many deaths so they told the great conquest that the generals did was a thing to be proud and all of those who fought are war heroes.
But unfortunately the count of death was leaked and all were in shook, and all know who to blame... "That damn king who let is people die without food and when he is bored let them die in some far away desert"
4th of April The farmers and the workers of the capital, already angry, decide to storm the palace, unfortunately the royal guards had blocked them. The crowd decide then to storm the building who represents the royal power. They took statues, the police stations, the courts, and at last the most important, The prison, where Roland is, or better, was.
Due to his strategic knowledges of how a battle is fought he decided to take the lead of the rebellion
When the rest of the city revolted in the afternoon, the king decided to surrender and the palace was sacked.
As the now military governor of the city, he made a deal witn the king, to save the lives of the royal family (his childerns and his wife), Alfred announced his abdication And with that the transfer of power to the "Nordish provisional government", led by Roland and the other generals, now the only legitimate authority.
As the first act of the government the government decided that elections were to happen the next day, the 5th of April.
This first election, were not normal democratic elections, cause only one party was Allowed.
But more of a vote if this new republic had the support of the people or if the Loyalist to the crown were still a majority in the country."
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Hi!
I am currently feeding my recently adopted dog this: https://www.chewy.com/natural-balance-limited-ingredient/dp/537302
Basically Natural Balance dry dog food. It says vegetarian but checks out as vegan. When my dog first got here (she's a husky) she showed no interested in the food, but was being hesitant to eat anything that wasn't super appealing in every way. She was nervous, I think, but she has since started eating the food.
I just can't shake the feeling that she doesn't actually enjoy it though based on her behavior when she eats it. I also know that just dry dog food isn't all that great but i am on a limited income and can't throw in a bunch of fruits and such to further entice her.
Because she wouldn't eat for like half a week, we got some Pedigree packets of wet food and mixed it in with her evening meal since I didn't want her to constantly be hungry and therefore miserable, though I think there's less animal death involved with the meat coming from just the packets. I worry that if we take those packets away, she will also be unhappy, as she looks forward to them a great deal.
My previous dogs were malamutes, and would eat just about everything, but I have only decided to feed my dog vegan this time around. She's much more to the carnivore side of omnivore though.
In your opinions, what vegan dog food tastes the best, and is there a significant difference? What can I do that is affordable to mimic those super cheap wet food packets in the evening if at all possible?
Just to preempt anyone thinking it, if you are going to argue that it doesn't matter if she is super into the food as long as she eats it because regular food kills animals, I have made a commitment to this dog now, and her well being and happiness are first on my list. I know not everyone will see things like that, but that particular issue isn't up for debate. I want to feed her vegan, but I want her quality of life to be exceptional, as well.
Currently, I am stretched thin with her food price, but could shuffle things around $10 pr $20 or so and still manage. I very much want to feed her vegan if at all possible.
Thanks in advance for being understanding and not quoting statistics at me to guilt me into just letting her be unhappy with her food, because I already know those statistics. If you never intended to do that, apologies, but I've seen that done a lot.

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Two items — a crystal ball, and a green leather-bound notebook — sat benignly and idly atop of the black-robed professor’s desk.
The camera lingered on them, giving them what most may see as an undeserved moment in the spotlight.
But to those that knew, to the parties invested in this controversy, this little pause and dramatic zoom-in was accompanied by a hair-raising excitement… along with an untempered nervousness for what was to come.
It definitely caused the investigative duo on the other side of the screen some pause for thought; prompting them to stand intently, pondering both the orb and the notebook.
Ilunor, as far as I could tell, was entranced by the green notebook in particular. Though it wasn’t a trance born out of any positive emotion, but instead, one of abject horror.
“Recommended Reading Materials for the Studious Student.” Sorecar announced with a steady breath, prompting Ilunor to visibly flinch in his seat, as the man reached a finger over to point at the hand-scrawled title of the leather-bound notebook. That finger soon found itself carefully manipulating its pages, opening the cover first, before turning over the internal dust-cover to reveal letters and symbols written in High Nexian, but arranged in a manner the EVI simply could not translate.
“Error: Unable to Translate. Cause: Unrecognized and/or unintelligible organization of local script-forms.”
Yet despite this, it seemed as if both Sorecar and the Apprentice were able to draw something from its otherwise senseless pages. As despite being written haphazardly, with letters and pictograms arranged in no meaningful order, they were able to still draw meaning where the EVI couldn’t.
“Within these pages lie materials for the studious student. Materials are to be found within The Library, and are to be retrieved with great haste. May you make swift work of their contents, and may those after you find only ash in your wake. Seek, unlearn, and remove from the grip of the eternal entity, that which was once a gift but is now a curse. Seek, unlearn, and remove; with the fires of your passion, oh studious student.” Sorecar read aloud, managing to read something verbatim from the nonsensical pages of the book.
Ilunor’s eyes were practically glazed over at this point, as he began bringing his cape over across his chest, tucking his legs towards his chin in the process.
“This is it.” The apprentice announced with a half-cracked smile. “Please, keep going. I’m certain your skills of appraisal far exceed my own, Professor.”
Sorecar obliged by flipping the page, turning over to two pages of complete gibberish, once again watermarked by the EVI’s error message; but proving no challenge at all for the ever-inquisitive professor.
“Section One, A Tainted Reality: A Wretched Collection of Historical Affidavits During the Reconciliation and Reformation of Otherwise Lost Realities.” Sorecar paused, before turning towards the apprentice. “It lists an entire section’s worth of books, in titles held within spatial positions with reference to their potentialities within the ever-evolving library.”
Thacea’s features visibly flinched at that revelation, but similar to the apprentice in the footage, she refused to comment. At least not for now. Her eyes however betrayed a look of mild distress, which subsided somewhat as the apprentice urged the armorer to continue.
Which he did, as he flipped from page to page across the relatively small notebook, only pausing to read in between what he interpreted to be different sections and ‘chapters’.
“Section Two. The Unspoken War and the Treacherous Alliance.”
“Section Three. All surviving works from Alaroy Rital.”
The apprentice cocked her head, as if trying to recall some familiarity in that name. “Alaroy Rital.” She repeated. “I don’t recall hearing of such a name before.”
“Well his full name, as far as I recall, and vastly aided by the book is as follows: Alaroy Rital, Lord-Mayor of the Township of the Two Rivers, Slayer of the Dragon of the Grey Canyon, Repeller of the Tainted Blight of the Orsin, Liberator of the Aether, and Grand Master of the Elusian Guild Hall of Adventurers.” Sorecar responded succinctly, prompting the apprentice to once more clench her eyes shut in deep thought, before finally letting out a sigh of defeat.
“The name is both familiar yet foreign at the same time.” She finally admitted.
“As far as I recall, and mind you, my memory of those years are far from perfect… the man was a local hero of sorts. Though his record was besmirched by some controversy or another.” Sorecar offered, prompting the apprentice to finally shrug, giving up on this particular subject matter entirely.
“There are more sections, yes?”
“Correct.”
“Then let’s move on.”
Sorecar nodded promptly at that, flipping the pages over until he hit the next section.
“Section Four. A Sordid Account of the Most Bizarre of Newrealmer Arrivals: A Death By Harmonization and the Ensuing Investigation.”
That immediately got my attention, causing me to jolt forwards, prompting the armor to quickly follow as it automatically switched from the currently active in-armor-postural-readjustment mode, and back into its active configuration.
“Section Five. The Unfortunate Procedures Against Unruly Realms and the Instances in Which Such Procedures Were Incurred.”
The armorer paused after that, not necessarily due to its contents, but as if puzzled by what lay ahead in the next few final pages. In fact, he flipped back and forth between the pages soon after that, treading and retreading what were effectively the last five pages of the book. “There is an appendix which includes titles not covered by these sections, however it will take some time to read through them.”
“That’s enough for now, professor.” The apprentice offered, prompting the man to quickly pull back, closing the notebook with an unsatisfying thump. “We have our glowing wand.” The apprentice surmised. “The oeuvre of works which are no doubt the subject of this grand controversy. Now all we need to find is the contract which ties everything together.”
“I’m assuming you haven’t forgotten about our second item of interest?” Sorecar gestured towards the crystal ball.
“Of course not, professor. However, the fact we’ve found that book implies that we must be close to its dependent article.” The apprentice responded with a renewed sense of urgency, as she began using that same ornate magnifying glass in an attempt to further pick apart each and every nook and cranny of Mal’tory’s desk.
Part of me wanted to make some joke about how this was every unpaid intern’s dream, to be rummaging through your boss’ stuff.
But that part of me was completely buried underneath the confusion and dread that came with the revelations from within that little green book.
I… honestly didn’t know what I was expecting, but I felt like I’d been suckerpunched, with the wind being knocked right out of me from the implications of exactly what had been selectively purged from the library.
It was a struggle to process it all, which more or less made me dull out the more eccentric aspects of the apprentice’s investigation; as she unlocked drawer after drawer, pulling out pile after pile of magical nicknacks and more documents than what was possible from that finite amount of space.
Sorecar was clearly of the same opinion as the rest of us right now however, as he continued obsessing over the book, his hands once more trailing over to inspect its cryptic pages. The man seemed transfixed on the second and third sections in particular, though his featureless visor made it difficult to really pin down what his reactions were.
Yet throughout all of this, it was clear the reactions on the homefront were much, much more animated, as Ilunor was just about ready to pass out from the stress, and Thacea seemed about ready to burst at the seams if her featureless facade was of any indication.
“That was the book.” Ilunor finally chimed out, just as the narration through the recording had died down during the more tepid phase of the apprentice’s investigation. “I know it.”
“I thought your memories when it came to the whole Mal’tory book burning situation was lost, Ilunor?” Thalmin countered.
“It was. I mean, it still is. But I remember parts of that room. I vaguely recall the emergence of a book that I was forced to…” The Vunerian trailed off, as if struggling to piece together words.
“... to sign?” Thalmin offered in a surprisingly helpful tone which stood at odds with how he earlier regarded the Vunerian.
“No. No you imbecil-” The Vunerian paused, realizing his misstep as he backtracked from what would’ve otherwise been an expected response. “That wasn’t a book of binding. It’s not comparable to the yearbook, if that was where your assumptions were leading to, Prince Thalmin.” Ilunor clarified, gripping the armrests of his seat tight between his fingers.
It was about this point in time that I expected Thacea to chime in, to elaborate on the nature of the book with her encyclopedic knowledge on seemingly every aspect of the magical world.
But she didn’t.
Instead, her eyes remained practically glued to the screen, as I realized that whatever had been revealed thus far had hit much, much harder than I could’ve imagined.
Ilunor, as if taking note of this silence, elected to fill in for Thacea. “The book… is an adjacent artifact. It is, as the apprentice has noted, an eclectic oeuvre of works, a list if you will, to be bound to and referenced by a contract and a spell of binding. The book itself isn’t the binding agent, moreso the reference material by which the contract is hinged upon.”
“So what’s with the illegible text? Are they ciphers or some magical equivalent of it?” I gestured once more at the bird’s eye view offered by the drone, and the pages of indecipherable text currently beneath Sorecar’s hands.
“Those are anchor runes, earthrelamer.” Ilunor answered with a frustrated sigh. “It is frustrating to see them for what they are not. Frankly, it’s as if your sight-seers and memory-shards were designed to mimic the world as it is seen through the eyes of a particularly weak-fielded commoner.” The Vunerian went off, venting his frustrations through a rant before finally calming down. “But I digress. Those runes are referred to as anchors for a reason. For tethered to them are akin to pages of text to be openly read and deciphered within the manastreams. Granted, this form of writing is not common; moreso used for the purposes of contracts and other such magical binds.”
“And on the topic of contracts. I’m assuming that the contract… your contract, is what the Apprentice is currently rummaging for?” I gestured towards the screen once more, at the apprentice who was now buried ankle-deep in piles upon piles of books, documents, and an assortment of scrolls that criss-crossed across the room’s mahogany and carpeted floors.
“Unless she’s a complete nitwit, then I’d imagine so, yes.” Ilunor responded with his signature cattiness. “In any case, the fact she’s even trying proves that she’s barely above a fool anyways.” The Vunerian shrugged. “And before you ask, earthrealmer, let me preempt your question. The contract, at least on the professor’s end, has more than likely suffered the same fate as my own. Namely, its existence is more than certain to be dubious at best. What the apprentice will surely find will be nothing more than ash at the bottom of that bottomless drawer. Which… given its sheer size and scale, and the potential inhabitants within its limitless confines, will more than likely result in even ash being difficult if not impossible to find.”
There was… more than one point I wanted to raise with Ilunor’s statements. However, before I could address any of them, the elf in question finally spoke up once more; now surrounded by an entire archive’s worth of documents and nicknacks.
“Nothing.” Larial spoke with a sullen breath, taking a moment to steady herself as she made a point of not sitting on Mal’tory’s chair. “At least nothing that’s relevant to our case.” She continued, resting her palms flat against the green suede of the desk.
“Were you really expecting anything different, Apprentice?” Sorecar countered, having since moved from pondering the pages of the book to now pondering the depths of the crystal ball.
“I’d assumed the damage to the man hadn’t been so severe.” Larial admitted, alluding to something else that drew all of our collective attention. “When I first saw him in the healing ward… he looked… intact. You couldn’t even tell there was anything wrong with him.”
“And yet they called you of all people, to aid in the ritual.” The armorer surmised, with a tone of voice that now more resembled that of a fully fledged Academy Professor. His happy go lucky persona had subsided completely, at least for now, as he addressed Larial in a manner more akin to what I’d expected of the Dean. “You have been around the Academy for long enough to understand that calling upon the aid of apprentices is unprecedented. Which means that despite how things may seem on the surface, that lurking beneath the seemingly calm waters, is a hydrostorm of epic proportions.”
“This entire situation is unprecedented, professor.” Larial countered meekly. “But you are correct. It… must have been desperate if they required the aid of apprentices. I just… cannot fathom the fact that the professors must have…” The apprentice trailed off, her face scrunching up and breaking eye contact with the armorer as if too skittish to broach the next point.
Sorecar didn’t reply, nor did he complete her sentence for her, simply allowing her to recuperate and reorganize her thoughts herself.
“... brought the man back from the brink.” She managed out, offering what was in effect a euphemism that didn’t seem to sit right with the armorer, if his immediate head cock was of any indication.
“That is the only way you can explain the complete loss of a contract.” Sorecar reasoned. “You were hoping to find it, despite knowing well that it, amongst the rest of his contracts, have more than likely gone up in flames.” It was around that point that he walked around behind the desk, and reached down into the drawer the apprentice had been searching in. His arm sank impossibly deep, deeper than what should have been physically possible inside of that small and limited space. After a few moments, the man finally brought his hand back up, holding within it what appeared to be fine specks of ash that he allowed to filter back down into the dark depths of the seemingly bottomless drawer. “And there you have it — ash. Most of it has no doubt already been consumed by the bottom-feeders. However, what remains is enough to account for what is perhaps more contracts than most would form in their lives.”
The man stood back up soon after, before once more taking his place at the front of the desk.
“Well, I believe that answers our prior speculations on Auris Ping’s potential relations, contractual or otherwise, with Professor Mal’tory.” Thalmin growled out, punctuating the moment of silence within the footage; which soon continued with a resonant sigh from the apprentice.
“I guess, in a way, I was trying to find the contract not so much because of my assigned task, but because I wanted to perhaps prove to myself that the situation wasn’t as dire as my intuition leads me to believe. The loss of all these contracts can only mean one thing.” Larial paused, once more trying to find the strength inside of her to face whatever facts were self-evident in this case. “The man was lost.” She finally managed out through a shaky breath. “His soul must have departed from his mortal coil. And yet…”
“... and yet he remains.” Sorecar surmised.
“They must have re-tethered it before I arrived that night.” The apprentice shot back. “But I felt nothing different when they asked me to aid in the mana-channeling processes. This whole situation is just…” She sighed, prompting Sorecar to cock his head.
“Unprecedented?”
“Yes.” The apprentice once more admitted, sinking her face into her hands and taking a moment to process it all, more or less falling into the same camp all of us were currently in. “Moreover, it brings up a very disturbing question.”
“Which is?”
“If his soul was truly untethered, even for a split second… how exactly were they able to retether it? Or more specifically, through what means are they using to permanently retether his soul to his mortal coil?”
This question seemed to cause some level of concern from Sorecar, as his answer soon demonstrated. “There are… ways of doing so that aren’t exclusive to being spellbound to armor.” The man offered under a dour breath. “Especially if the body is… fresh, in a manner of speaking. Though it requires the use of-” He stopped, halting himself from going down what was clearly a darkening path. “I apologize for prompting this rather… dark and dreary subject matter, Apprentice.” Sorecar offered, as that empathetic, kinder side of him returned without much prompting.
“It’s quite alright. It… it needed to be said, if we are to complete this investigation with any degree of professionalism.” The apprentice concluded with a small smile. “Whatever the case may be, it is clear that we are unable to procure the contract through which the perpetrator of the library’s burning was bound. We have, however, undeniable proof of Professor Mal’tory’s involvement with the scandal.” She pointed at the green notebook. “And of course, a potential interloper who may or may not have been a part of this conspiracy; thereby expanding this from a mere Academy matter, to one which could implicate others beyond its walls.” She pointed at the crystal ball. “Have you discovered anything from your observations thus far, Professor?” The apprentice inquired, prompting the man to nod, as he knelt down to eye-level, pondering the orb from desk-height.
“The inherent limitations of the Echovale make it so that it’s near impossible to transcribe anything following the cessation of a communique.” Sorecar began. “Though of course, you knew this, and hoped that because I am perhaps one of the greatest armorers to have ever lived, that I would be able to aid in this impossible endeavor, hmm?” The armorer’s tone of voice had more or less resumed that flighty, happy-go-lucky one I knew him for.
The apprentice, hearing this, could only smile awkwardly in response. “I wouldn’t have put it that… bluntly, professor. But I do indeed have faith in your ability to make the impossible, well… probable, at the least.”
“Hmph! Well, I couldn’t pin a face or a name, but I was able to pin a definite location if that helps.” The man offered.
“Any stray piece of information will help tremendously, professor.”
“The Crownlands.” He answered without a hint of hesitation, prompting the Apprentice to raise both of her brows up high.
“That’s as far as I am able to draw from the residual echoes within the vale.” He tapped at the ball, generating a series of satisfying clinks in the process.
“So the man wasn’t acting alone. Or rather, perhaps he was consulting someone.” The apprentice pondered. “Then again, that final communique could very well be with Lord Lartia—” The apprentice paused, before placing both palms softly across her throat. “—may his soul rest in peaceful slumber.” Following another moment of silence, the apprentice’s hands soon shifted towards the ball. “In any case, if it isn’t Lord Lartia, then who could it possibly be? Maybe we should…” The apprentice suddenly stopped; as if realizing the dangers of diving any deeper into this growing conspiracy. “No.” She quickly corrected herself. “Whatever the case may be, this is probably now completely out of my purview. I was assigned to collect any evidence I deemed to be relevant to recent happenings, and I believe this should suffice.”
“Whatever you believe is best, apprentice.” Sorecar acquiesced, prompting the apprentice to slowly, but surely, pack the archive’s worth of documents, books, and scrolls all back into the drawer using nothing but telekinetic spells.
This left just the crystal ball, and the little green book, both of which the apprentice promptly pocketed into a small pouch, before placing it somewhere beneath her cloak.
“Though on that note…” Sorecar began, pointing towards the apprentice’s cloak. “If I may ask, how do you plan on divvying up these finite pieces of evidence?”
This caught the apprentice off-guard, as her mouth opened, but no response came through.
“Moreover, are you even obligated to hand in this evidence? Or are you only expected to write a report to all parties involved?” Sorecar continued, pressing the matter further, causing the apprentice to stop mid-stride. “Because if primary evidence isn’t explicitly required, might I offer my services as a master forger?” The man spoke with a hint of mischievousness, the duality of the word perhaps translating equally well despite the language barrier.
“I may need to contact my superiors to ask if a… copy will be satisfactory to their needs. I believe not, but… we shall see. In any case, I am due to submit the evidence along with my report no later than the end of next week. As such, this should give me ample time to organize my findings, which is especially convenient given the roster of duties I am expected to cover over the next few days.” The apprentice took a moment to pinch the bridge of her nose, halting her rambles as she steadied herself with a sigh. “But I digress, I believe I will take you up on that offer, Professor Pliska.”
“It would be my pleasure to welcome you into my domain, apprentice.”
The rest of the footage consisted of small talk between the pair, with nothing in particular standing out as the topics being addressed soon turned from high-stakes espionage, and back into faculty banter.
Yet despite that, none of us broke the silence that now dominated the boring trip back. Not even as the footage came to a complete stop, and there was nothing more left to play.
I leaned back against the armor, eliciting a series of creaks from the couch below me, echoing across the high-ceilinged room and disrupting the tentative peace that came with this ominous silence.
“This explains… a lot.” Thalmin offered, finally breaking the silence with a tentative tone of voice. “It explains your contract, and its abrupt cessation.” He continued, turning towards Ilunor. “It explains Mal’tory, or at least, his current lack of public appearances. And it reveals to us exactly what he was trying to hide from you, Emma.” The lupinor eventually turned towards me. “And I think the sections of the library, selectively pruned, are self-explanatory as well.”
“Section four, and section five, at least.” I replied shortly thereafter. “I have no idea who or what Alaroy Rital has to hide in section three, and don’t even get me started on section two, let alone section one.” It was at that point that I turned towards Thacea, who let out a sharp exhale upon me bringing up section one.
“The removal of all information relevant to… and I quote — Tainted Realities — speaks volumes to the inherent fears of the Nexus. Though I know not what specifically they may fear from your discovery of its deep and now-lost lore.” Thacea offered through a pensive gaze. “There are many rumors, legends that come with the phrase Tainted Reality. Though most are mythical; epics of long lost eras that dwell between the blurry line that exists between history and legend. Perhaps the records within the library were pieces of irrefutable evidence that would’ve shed light on this nebulous subject matter. But even so… that begs the question… why? Why would they hide what is effectively a non-issue when it comes to your discovery of its lore? Taint, and more specifically, the concept of a Tainted Reality, is something that is inconsequential in the contemporary world. Its history, even if it proves to be true, is neither a disruptive political element, nor a practical tool for war, that could be used in countering the Nexus.” The avinor’s explanations were clear, concise, and yet they belied something personal that she clearly wasn’t broaching.
And I wasn’t about to dig either, not when this topic very clearly hit close to home for her.
“This leaves the second subject matter then.” I offered, giving the avinor an off-ramp towards a potentially more palatable topic.
“The Unspoken War and the Treacherous Alliance?”
“Correct.” I nodded.
“That… I have no knowledge of.” The avinor admitted, prompting me to turn to both the lupinor and the Vunerian for answers.
“Don’t look at me, earthrealmer, I’m the one who lost all memories on the subject, remember?” Ilunor countered.
“I’m afraid I’m as in the dark as you are on this one, Emma.” Thalmin replied with a loud huff, leaving me with perhaps more questions than answers at this point.
“Right then.” I nodded. “Well, regardless, as disquieting, confusing, and disturbing as these revelations have been, they are exactly that — revelations.” I took a moment to stand up, resting both hands on my hips, as if adopting Ilunor’s more theatrical approach to things. “We started today off with no intel on Mal’tory, with no idea how we were going to complete The Library’s Seekership questline, and no knowledge on exactly where we stood in this game. We’re ending today off with a firm grasp on exactly what we need to do, what exactly was scorched in the library, and a tentative understanding on Mal’tory’s fate. I’d say that’s an incredible step forward, even if the answers we now have are leading to even more questions.”
“Reality is often filled with disturbing truths, but only when we acknowledge them, can we act to change them.” Thacea offered.
“Here here!” Thalmin reaffirmed through a firm stomp, standing up tall and ready.
“While certain revelations come as disappointments… namely the survival of Professor Mal’tory… it is indeed somewhat satisfying to hear that the man is at the very least suffering for his actions.” The little thing spoke maliciously, as he too stood up. This prompted a look of worry to form amidst all three of us, but instead of reacting accordingly, he instead displayed an expression of confusion. “What? The man was a monster! He actively antagonized not only me, but this entire group! Surely you also feel at least some sense of satisfaction at the consequences of his actions catching up to him!”
“The delight in an enemy’s defeat, best comes from the resistance of the blade against his body. Not from the suffering incurred from happenstance.” Thalmin countered, whilst Thacea and I refused to entertain that line of thought, as I quickly placed a palm across my forehead, bonking it once again in the process.
“Right, well, here’s the game plan. We now have a clear target to complete our first objective — the notebook. We grab that, hand it in to the library, and presto, we accomplish the Seekership questline. Now comes the difficult part… how exactly do we do that?” I turned to the group, as offers and suggestions finally came flying in.
“Take advantage of your life debt?” Ilunor offered.
“I wouldn’t take advantage of that card just yet, Ilunor. Not if we have other options.” Thacea countered.
“What if we steal it?” Thalmin proposed.
“Thievery isn’t a diplomatic approach, Thalmin.” Thacea shot back with a glare.
“Well, Emma here was able to grapple her way, through manaless means, across the outside of the castle towards the apprentice whilst she was in the medical wing. I’m sure we can pull something else off in a similar capacity!” The lupinor countered.
“No, Thalmin. As much as I would like to try, I believe it might be best if we try a more diplomatic approach.” I offered, prompting the three to cock their heads.
“We could just ask, right?”
First Previous Next
​
(Author’s Note: And there we have it! The first step towards the completion of the Library's questline! We've found exactly what we were looking for, the list of books that were ordered to be put to the dragon flame by Mal'tory. With that being said however, a new series of questions arises... exactly why were these books targeted in particular? Moreover, what exactly was lost as a result? These questions and more will continue to linger in the back the gangs' minds as we push forward! Especially as we now find ourselves in the midst of another conundrum, exactly how are we going to get the book to the library! Regardless, this is still a massive step forward, and one that will surely bring Emma and Ilunor closer towards addressing the first phase of their intertwined fates with the library! I hope you guys enjoy! :D The next Two Chapters are already up on Patreon if you guys are interested in getting early access to future chapters!)
[If you guys want to help support me and these stories, here's my ko-fi ! And my Patreon for early chapter releases (Chapter 84 and Chapter 85 of this story is already out on there!)]

Game Name: District of Dreams
System: Changeling: the Dreaming 20th Anniversary Edition
Any homebrews?: I'm not planning for anything
Proposed Time Slot: Friday nights, 8PM to 12 AM EST, first season in January 2025
Expected Season Length: 10 episodes, with multiple seasons planned.
Cast Size: PCs: 4 minimum, 5 Maximum. SPCs… maybe, as needed.
Format: Podcast, art will be commissioned.
Game Description:

January 2024, somewhere on Theodore Roosevelt Island, Washington D.C.

The low level hum of busy conversation mingles with the clinking of glasses and the rustle of papers and parchments as the Parliament of Dreams sits in recess between the latest rounds of debates. A pocket of representatives from Houses Ailil and Danaan argue amongst themselves over the most recent request from the Duchy of Steel for donations of glamour to bolster their dwindling balefires. Across the room, a commoner representative from the House of Concordia pleads her case before a group of skeptical sidhe nobility on whether or not non-noble representatives should be allowed to detain those nobles suspected of breaking the Escheat until they could be investigated, questioned (and presumably punished) by their peers.
Boggan servers move among the clusters of chatting representatives and lobbyists, and a band of clurichan and eshu musicians sit in a corner weaving a quiet tune, using the parliament’s ancient cantrips to help keep conversations from carrying too far or becoming overwhelmed by neighboring talk. An eruption of surprised cries cuts through the din for just a moment, as a chubby raccoon leaps from the shoulder of an autumn sidhe, its arms filled to bursting with finger sandwiches and a large pastry in its mouth. People step back in mingled confusion and alarm as it tears a path through the crowds, chased by a boggan wielding a suspiciously empty but still crumb-smudged serving platter over his head like a weapon of war.
Just another day in the Parliament of Dreams, Ellen Rynson thinks as she lets out a bored sigh and looks out the window at the trees surrounding the building and, beyond them, the waters of the Potomac River. In the distance she can just see the white gleam of the Lincoln Memorial thanks to the clear, cold January sky outside the windows. She’s just considering packing up her things and heading out for the day, reasoning that nothing interesting is likely to happen today, despite what her lead from that House Beaumayn said. For all their cryptic insistence that the auguries pointed toward something big happening that day she would want to be present for, so far there had been only more of the same.
Pleading commoners, bickering nobility, and precious little progress in any one direction. Honestly, the raccoon pookah stealing people’s lunch had been the most interesting thing to happen in three days. She had a mortal job to get back to, articles waiting on her to write them. Injustices needing exposure, lost causes needing bolstering and support from empathetic readers. Those were situations she could influence, people she could make a difference for. But here? This place? It wouldn’t ever change, so far as she could see. The High King was infuriatingly detached, insisting all was well when baelfires across Concordia were sputtering and threatening to die out as the autumn world fell into further division and discord, and prodigals like vampires and technology-loving mages became further entrenched, warping the autumn world and smothering its dreamers with ruthless, uncaring precision.
She turns, reaching for the strap of her messenger bag just as the room plunges into a tense, eerie silence. Vacant stares on the faces of the musicians, several figures in the crowed begin to speak in unison, their voices raised like a choral cry, discordant harmonies overriding the cantrips woven into the building’s stones and lifting, filling the air around and above the confused, worried looking members of parliament and those joining them.
A boggin server, her skin a wrinkled nut brown’s head is thrown back, and her voice lifts in harmony to a sidhe knight Ellen couldn’t remember the name of, who spoke in tandem with a knocker who moments earlier had been leveling an an expletive laced, but impassioned argument for glamour donations to the hard hitting rust belt states, raw, thick glamour pulsing through the room in ways most within hadn’t felt in years, if ever.
”In twilight of a gilded reign, As shadows dance and whispers feign, The high one's light shall dim and fade, By fate's cruel hand, a debt is paid.
A sword of legend, lost in night, Its gleam obscured from mortal sight, By treachery or destiny, In absence, a lost legacy.
Heart of stone and marble spire, Where power's grasp need not expire, Legends from forgotten days, Rouse the dream from ancient haze.
The crownless stand with eyes of fire, As chaos fuels their heart's desire, Old bonds shall break, new pacts be sworn, As heroes rise and hope is born.
When echoes of the past resound, And ancient dreams again are found, The veil 'twixt worlds shall thin and tear, Beware the time, and all take care.
For in the wake of shadow's call, The fate of kingdoms rise and fall, And from the mists of timeless lore, The once and future dream restore.”
The magic releases, the raw glamour subsiding rapidly and leaving Ellen feeling unsteady on her feet, her head swimming like she’s had too much to drink. Instinct drives her to haul her bag up, her opposite hand already pulling a pen from where it's tucked behind her ear to begin scribbling what she can remember of the prophecy onto a piece of paper. An alarmed whisper begins to ripple through the room, occasionally punctuated by exclamations of concern and fear. People were too shocked to manage to be too rowdy, and the musicians were all coming out of what seemed like a daze.
That is when a booming voice breaks through the crowd once more as a large blue skinned troll stands in the doorway, his cheeks already wet with tears.

”The High King is dead. Long live the High Queen.”

Welcome to Washington D.C. in the modern nights. The seat of power for Concordia and the United States alike, the Parliament of Dreams has recently experienced an extreme shift, with the dreaming whisking the buildings of Concordia’s government from New York City to the District for reasons unknown. Our story will take place in the wake of High King David Ardry’s death, and the resulting political fallout. As this seismic event rocks Concordia to its core, kithain - noble and commoner alike - must navigate a dangerous reoccurrence of events thought left behind at the end of The Evanescence in the 1990s. Multiple claimants to the throne step forward, noble houses begin to draw lines in the sand and insist their own members are worthy of the seat, and in dark corners there are whispers about new forms of government and tearing down the structures of power.
And to top it all off, the Dreaming acts in mysterious and erratic ways, setting events in motion that worry everyone about the stability of their world.
As a Changeling, you still live in a World of Darkness, but you dream of a different world altogether - a world of monsters and knights and troubadours, a world powered by the creativity of dreamers the world over, a world that has its shadows, but those shadows are cast by the fires of creativity itself...and if you are smart enough and lucky enough, you can make your dreams manifest.
All that being said, please do not come to me with a ready-made character concept - I will ignore it and it will even be points against you if you try to use that to sell me on picking you for the game. Come to me ready to sell yourself as a player. I’m far more interested in making sure I get a good mix of personalities and to be sure that my players all fit the kind of play style I’m going for. Characters will come later, when we sit down as a group to build out our motley and figure out how each individual character fits with the others and as part of the whole.
Other Information:
Mood: Hope in the face of uncertainty and tragedy, a hero’s call to adventure
Inspirational Sources: The Lord of the Rings, Labyrinth, Neverwhere, The West Wing, The Crown
Tone:

"I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo.
"So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."

Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6CcKUOfmkFYded8xc3lBIp?si=2a8573a0393b4e59
Trigger Warnings: (Fantasy) Racism, Classism, Harm to Animals, (nonphysical) Harm to Children, Mental Illness, Violence, Political themes
How to Apply: Fill out this form. https://forms.gle/gqPzgjWHnctHMdHG6

^{This is a repost with new info, corrections and better formatting. Thanks for previous contributions! <3}
I've seen quite a few "All lost My Chemical Romance songs" and "My Chemical Romance rarities" posts, but they mostly all either:

A: Conflate "Lost" with "Rare" or "Not studio-produced" B: Aren't Sourced C: Incomplete D: Have disinfo E: Mistakenly include working titles for later released tracks as "lost"

So, here we go! I've gotten most of my info from a few archives and long-time fans in the community but I would love to hear any additions you have to add! The more eyes the better!

For clarity: Bullets = I Brought You My Bullets, You Brought Me Your Love Revenge = Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge LOTMS = Life on the Murder Scene TBP = The Black Parade TBPID = The Black Parade Is Dead! DD = Danger Days CW = Conventional Weapons TPK = The Paper Kingdom MDNSY = May Death Never Stop You

^{Tracks are listed in supposed creation order, then by discovery or release} Nine Volt Heart ^aka Android [..?] - Song title found in now-lost Flash player elements of My Chemical Romance's official site going back to at least 5/25/2002. According to a 2011 text interview by Cassie The Venomous with Gerard and Mikey, the song was played once live at NJ's Loop Lounge to bad reactions from the band and poor fanfare and as a result shelved from future releases. Later possibly reworked into an unreleased song named "'Android...' something?". Though according to a 2004 post by SpaceyRaygun, a long-time friend of the band, Nine Volt Heart was instead reworked onto a Revenge track. ^{Fandom rumors going back to at least 5/3/2006 claim Nine Volt Heart was a cover of the Smashing Pumpkins' song Bodies albeit with slightly different lyrics. Although the poster's source songmeanings.net has since taken down the potentially false lyrics page.}
The Attic Demos ^aka Dreams ^\of/about]) Stabbing and/or Being Stabbed - A CD Distributed at early shows and among the band's circle. Later partially released on 2014's MDNSY, though these demos circulated the fandom pre-2014 from these promotional CDs.

Wish You Away ^aka Drowning Lessons Rough Mix - If community sources are to be believed (1) (2) (3) (4)) (5) a variant of The Attic Demos distributed among friends and family of the band contains recordings of 'Vampires Will Never Hurt You' titled "Stabbing" and 'Drowning Lessons' titled "Wish You Away" (Pre-release titles corroborated by the early instances of My Chemical Romance's website).
Stabbing ^aka Vampires Will Never Hurt You Demo - Found as of July 23rd, 2022. Demo released via Instagram from for Bullet's 20th anniversary. This CD was given to Nada Recording in 2002 prior to their recording of Bullets. Clip is partially cut off and downloaded through Instagram API.
Early Sunsets Over Monroeville Demo - An Attic Demo found by SpaceyRaygun with an Early Sunsets Over Monroeville recording not included on MDNSY. Included in notable bootlegs such as Self-titled MP3 Collection released 2010. ~Fake demo debunked by (Friend of Matt Pelissier) and SpaceyRaygun (The track's original source).

Sister to Sleep - One of the earliest songs written for Revenge, revealed in a 2003 interview as conceptualized for The Freddy vs. Jason Soundtrack before licensing fell through. It was re-conceptualized around The Sandman series of comics, where sleep is anthropomorphized as the titular Sandman, and his sister as Death. In its released form, the lyrics explore sleep as an analogy for death and themes of insomnia and institutionalization. Ultimately, the track was cut from release by producer Howard Benson. Two live recordings (1) (2) of this song have circulated the fandom for a number of years, with one found more recently all from the same show played in NYC's the Knitting Factory on 6/26/2003. On 10/17/2022, it was played once more in Inglewood during the RETURN Tour, albeit slightly different lyrics. Later, Frank spoke on a 2023 interview about using live footage for practice, likely explaining the difference in lyrics. In 2013 the band had stated in an interview potentially none of the members still possessed a copy of Sister to Sleep's demo recording (A claim still supported by Frank in a 2022 interview) except possibly for a soundcheck library recording Mikey was given from the Knitting Factory show. With renewed interest in the song, Matt Pelissier was asked via Twitter about the track. ^{If community sources \}1]) ^\2]) ^{are to be believed, a Twitter user "Martin" asked Gerard the whereabouts and existing number of these demos, Gerard would share that they lost the only existing copy moving from coast to coast a number of years ago. Martin then asked Matt about the demos to corroborate Gerard's story, which prompted Matt to reveal more info.} Matt claimed he was given an additional copy of Sister to Sleep, as were all of the band members, their studio and their label. Fans supposedly questioned his demo's legitimacy. (1) (2) (3) Matt then posted three 15 second clips of the track to his Instagram. These clips were DMCA claimed by Warner and Matt was threatened with potential legal action if he continued copyright violations. However, fans downloaded these clips before they were taken down. (1) (2) Afterwards, Matt was asked via text conversations by his Revenir bandmate u/dansplayslol11 after hearing the track if he still intended on leaking it. Matt explained that he didn't intend on releasing them being content as the apparent sole owner of the demo.

Manhattan Demos ^aka A-Demos - In 2013 the band had stated in an interview Sister to Sleep's studio recording existed on the "Manhattan Demos" or "A-Demos" as Ray called them that also contained demo material later released on LOTMS. Screenshots of other production tracklists around this time have also been leaked and released by several sources including Revenge producer Howard Benson. (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6)

I'm Not Okay (I Promise) Demo - A 1 minute 4 second Clip of an I'm Not Okay demo uploaded by the YouTube channel AJ Serna in 2012 which contains the line "And never mind the drugs you took" instead of Revenge's release version "The photographs your boyfriend took" with notably worse recording quality. ^{This lyric was likely remnants from when the song served as the conclusion to the album with a spoken word outro by Daryl Palumbo \}Of Glassjaw, Head Automatica] and is more in-line with) ^{early production takes of the song.}
Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge Instrumentals - Instrumental versions of all 13 original Revenge tracks can be heard as backing tracks for the duration of LOTMS. Never released as a stand-alone instrumental promotional album unlike TBP.
Someone Out There Loves You - Released as a live performance on the official TBPID DVD as Track 30 with a live video. Unofficially titled 'Stay' by fans before its official title was revealed by Gerard on Twitter. Frank revealed in an interview with The Music that the song had a studio demo but "lyrical reservations" prevented its release.
MCRBlog 09' Demos - Throughout 2009, the band would post an occasional series titled 'Practice Cam' where they'd take photos and videos of whiteboards containing song titles. Fans like Cassie the Venomous were able to decipher some of these titles, and later corroborate them with at-the-time newly released live performances. (What was initially titled 'Siren Song' as a live performance eventually released as 'AMBULANCE', ect.) However, some of these teased titles never received accompanying live material. These include:

"Still Alive" ^\Also detailed in) ^{this interview.\}) "Teenage Girl" "Pretty [..?]" "Monster Jam" ^\This could be in reference to the video game 'Monster Jam: Masters of Mayhem' of which 'I'm Not Ok)' ^{appeared as an in-game track})^.\)

Hell Hath No Fury - This track was apparently credited to My Chemical Romance (1) (2) for 2012's The Man With The Iron Fists but never appeared on the movie's soundtrack. ^{It's theorized this track midway through the film is a snippet of the track.}
The Paper Kingdom - Proceeding DD's touring cycle, the My Chemical Romance began work on their 5th studio record before scrapping the album due to burnout, depression and unhealthy habits. (1) (2) Some of this material was likely posted by a user named Excalibur and sold for $10k+ on the leaked music website Leaked.cx in late September 2022. Snippets of these tracks with added auditory watermarks were provided by the leaker for legitimacy from tracks with the filenames "Dark Cloud", "Witch" and "Wake Up!". However, these clips were taken down by Warner both on leaked.cx and on other sites' reposts, likely validating the leak's legitimacy. One track recognized by Warner's automatic content ID system was entitled "Paper Swords" by My Chemical Romance.

The Foundations of Decay Sessions - According to comments by Excalibur made under leaked.cxs TPK leak, they also possessed demo sessions for the My Chemical Romance's 2022 release The Foundations of Decay. It was unclear whether these sessions were also purchased and vaulted alongside TPK's leak by the same or another buyer.

... These aren't exactly "lost", only ^\notable]) live performances with no evidence of official or studio variants: ^{FYI, any of these songs can be heard with a simple YouTube or Internet Archive search \}if I don't already link a primary or secondary source here.)
Everybody Tie Your Shoe - Stage banter on TBP's 2007 tour. Released on the 'Fans of Compilations' bootleg album in 2008.
The Drugs - A scrapped song played live sometime during 2009 during the Summer Sonic Festival. Later never released alongside the other CW-era singles or later DD material. Released as a live track on 'Still Chemical Dependency' bootleg album in 2009.
Everybody Hates the Eagles ^aka Kill Em' All ^aka DD Jam Session - A DD-era Jam Session repurposed for the My Chemical Romance's 2022-2023 tour and given lyrics with a variety of concluding lines rhyming or spinning on the phrase "Everybody Hates the Eagles". (1) (2) (3) (4)
... These aren't in any sense "lost". Some just aren't on streaming services, just obscure or with no official release: ^{FYI, any of these songs can be heard with a simple YouTube or Internet Archive search \}if I don't already link a primary or secondary source here.)
Jack the Ripper (cover) - Live cover of Morrissey's song released on the EP Like Phantoms, Forever in 2002 including live banter, then later released as a cut-down version on the Thank You for the Venom 7" in 2004. ^{Often mistaken for separate live and studio tracks such as mislabeling on the Self-titled MP3 Collection and other MP3 archives.}
Give Em' Hell, Kid Alt. Version - An alternate version of Give Em' Hell, Kid from iTunes.
Under Pressure (cover) - Cover of Queen and David Bowie's song as a collaboration with The Used made for release as a single and a bonus track for The Used's 2004 release 'In Love and Death'.
Astro Zombies (cover) - Cover of Misfits' song released for Tony Hawk's American Wasteland 2005.
I Never Told You What I Do For a Living Demo - Demo track released on LOTMS lyrically and sonically distinct from its Revenge release.
Bury Me in Black - Demo released first as a Japanese Revenge bonus track, later released internationally on LOTMS.
Desert Song - Complete studio track intended for Revenge, released exclusively on LOTMS.
Song 2 (cover) - Cover of Blur's song released on Radio 1's Live Lounge Album in 2006.
The Black Parade Instrumentals - Promotional CDr distributed to advertisers alongside TBP in 2006.
The Black Parade: The B-Sides - Includes My way Home Is Through You, Kill All Your Friends and Heaven Help Us. Released as a stand-alone b-side album in 2009 including bonus tracks released alongside TBP in 2006.
Desolation Row (cover) - Cover of Bob Dylan's song for release with Watchmen (2009) with an accompanying promotional music video set in the Watchmen universe.
All I Want for Christmas Is You (cover) - Cover of Mariah Carey's song for 2009's Christmas compilation album Gift Wrapped: 20 Songs That Keep On Giving.
We Don't Need Another Song About California - Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys iTunes Deluxe bonus track.
Zero Percent - Danger Days: The True Lives of the Fabulous Killjoys Japanese bonus track.
Sing Single - Radio edit and instrumental single of Sing released in 2010.
The Mad Gear and Missile Kid EP - Collection of songs written during DD's production (Black Dragon Fighting Society being written before DD), intended to be My Chemical Romance's in-universe proxy. Released with DD's 2010 box set and released digitally for the first time in 2022.
Bulletproof Heart Single - Radio edit and instrumental single of Bulletproof Heart released in 2011.
Planetary (GO!) Remixes - Planetary (GO!) single remixes by Lags Gallows & Vasquez/Gorman released in 2011.
Common People (cover) - Cover of Pulp's song for BBC Radio 1, Released on the 2011 The Only Hope For Me Is You EP.
Every Snowflake is Different (Just Like You) - A track made for the show Yo' Gabba Gabba in 2011. Made alongside a music video featured on the show. Notably similar to S/C/A/E/C/O/W and preformed live by My Chemical Romance on tour the same year.
#SINGItForJapan - Full orchestral Japanese instrumental version of SING following earthquakes and tsunamis that devastated Japan in 2011. Released as a single alongside a YouTube upload and merchandise to raise money for Japanese charities.
The Kids from Yesterday Remixes - Australian-exclusive box set released 2012 including remixes from Dan P. Carter, Lags Gallows and Vazquez/Gorman.
Fake Your Death - The first track on May Death Never Stop You and released as a single. Theorized as originally made for TPK. Aside: I hear his VERY widely talked about as a fact, butthe main article citedis mistakenly referencing Gerard's solo work. As likely as this rumor is, there is no evidence.
Black Parade / Living with Ghosts - Black Parade's 10-year anniversary release including a variety of TBP demos both scrapped and reworked onto the 2006 release.
Welcome to the Black Parade (Steve Aoki 10th Anniversary Remix) - Remix of Welcome to the Black Parade by Steve Aoki for TBP's 10th Anniversary.
... Specific thanks to u/mj2000p, u/Tongara, u/danplayslol11, SpaceyRaygun and Party in the affiliated My Chemical Romance Discord for previous edits. To see the edits check out my original post.

Please do not harass or beg band members or those affiliated with the band for unreleased material. Archival efforts are important but many of these songs fall under copyright and/or hold great personal value. Be respectful in reaching out to potential leads.

If anyone has better sources, anything else to correct or add I'd love to add to what I have and will credit.
Thanks for all the help! <3 Happy 20 years to Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge! :3

Hi all,
I’m considering transferring out a small ish defined benefit pension into a SIPP.
The value of the pension is £2.5kpa. Key details are as follows: - inflation adjusted each year by CPI - lump sum death grant currently worth £11k - annual survivors pension of £0.6kpa - linked to state pension age but should be able to take it with reduced benefits of c45% reduction at 57. - some of the £2.5k benefit could be exchanged for a lump sum on a £1 for £7 lump sum basis at pensionable age.
Few details about me: 32M, looking to retire between 50-55. I’m conscious that the state pension age will continue to rise and I’ll take a big hit to take this pension early. I’m thinking that transferring the value now as a lump sum to a SIPP and with the (hopefully) compounding gains effect between now and when I’m 50-55 it’ll be worth more than if I leave it in the defined benefit scheme and take a % reduction to take it early.
1) Has anyone previously transferred out of a defined benefit scheme? How was the process of doing this? I know it’s frowned upon as usually they are really lucrative pension schemes but I just don’t feel it will fit with my circumstances / aims and objectives of retiring early. 2) Is there a rough rule of thumb for calculating how much this will be worth to transfer out? I’ve asked for a quote but would like to know roughly what to expect. It’s currently calculated as £40k of my LTA per the latest benefit statement. Does this translate to a value to transfer? I’m conscious that I’ll likely need to take specific financial advice for over £30k transfer.
Any help / thoughts much appreciated. I don’t really have anyone I can discuss this kind of thing with.

I have been feeling down since the start of June. My mind is becoming spacey, my energy levels are lower, and I have unexpected urges to cry. This happens every single June due to this being the month my father died. He was killed in a car crash while driving to work due to slick roads causing his compact vehicle to be crushed by two trucks.
This happened when I was 4 years old. I had no understanding of what death really was. All I knew is that my life turned upside down. I went from my day to day being at home with my mother while my father worked to jumping from babysitter to babysitter while my mother worked towards being able to provide for us. We moved around a ton after that, and I even had a stepfather briefly, so I never really had time to process his death. It wasn’t until socializing with others who had fathers that I realized there was something missing in my life. At that point, I had no memory of who he was. Even seeing pictures of him would not trigger any emotions for me. I started feeling guilty for not grieving him.
Then, I got older. I was finally able to learn the details of who he was and started processing it in therapy. He wasn’t the kind, strong man I envisioned all fathers to be, but rather one who projected the deep pain he felt onto others. He was a flawed human, just like everyone else. Suddenly, my broken, nonexistent grief started to make sense, but my other conflicting feelings started to confuse me more.
Whenever people compared me to him, I wasn’t proud anymore. I was angry. I would look at all the other girls with loving fathers and think, “why not me?” Weirdest of all, whenever June (Father’s Day and death anniversary) or his birthday came around, my body felt depleted of its energy, and I felt sad. I know that a car collision could happen at any moment, but whenever the conditions of a situation match the ones of his accident in June, I get this irrational fear that the same will happen to me. I even got into a minor collision where my car was totaled but I was not harmed at all. The panic in my body was unforgettable. I was grateful and relieved that no one got hurt, but it did trigger many thoughts about him.
Now, I am approaching the 20 year anniversary of his death and really do not know how to feel. My mind is telling me that it’s way past time to move on. My body is telling me that there is much more that needs to be processed. The grief will take a lifetime. For those of you who have had similar circumstances, how do you even begin to help your body process inner conflicts like this? In therapy, I can casually discuss the details of who he was, his death, and how it impacted me. I’ve done a lot of EMDR therapy around this subject but this low that I feel every June still persists. I just want some answers as to why that is. Does anyone resonate with this?

I saw a tumblr post about how 11 referenced tegan to clara and i began talking about adric parallels
Clara has A LOT of Adric parallels tbh
Jenna was partly cast to resemble Matthew Waterhouse and Robin Soans. Or at least she resembles them a lot!
Clara herself has parents that met in 1981
There is also a quote to a s18 episode with Adric in it but I don't remember which, I think it was rings of akhaten having either a state of decay or new beginning trilogy quote
and in face the raven, the doctor ends up tying the shoes of a kid resembling the fifth doctor. He says, remember 82 as he ties the kids shoes. This is an Adric reference too. I even gave them names, the mom is Vega Sourceheart and the kid is Blaic Sourceheart.
And somehow face the raven also combines it with traken destruction crumbs? It literally has robin soans playing a guy credited by his cause of death. He's credited as Chronolock Guy but I call him, Civul of Habria. I also call his wife Toci. And his dad's name is Dad bc that's an Habrian name. And then clara and ashildr say "do cybermen show mercy" while looking at his corpse. I literally believe he exists as a remind to Luvic's death during Traken's destruction.
Funny how two dorky brunette alien guys with five letter names ending in ic, both, eventually, in later on episodes\serials than they were introduced, died young via an accidental explosion\natural force\crash while "piloting" a structure (throne of a castle, lifeboat of a freighter) into something natural yet a alien to them in a way (be it an entropy wawe or ancient earth) in an event which caused an impact and is practically historical\wiping out species. Both being accidents but partly caused by the Doctor's villains AKA the Master and the Cybermen.
Not saying that in another universe Clara would be born to Adric and Luvic but it's possible that would've happened, that there was another possible original or alternate universe Clara in an universe where the New Beginnings Trilogy happened a bit different and Adric was an adult already when he first came to N-Space in "the Keeper of Traken".
But if you reverse ic you get ci that is similiar to the cl in clara...
I still need to stress out stuff related to that era ngl. Recently found out that I was treating it like my little pony background characters and not real people with hopes and dreams... For a long time I had not processed the grief.