Goedemiddag,
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Ik heb recentelijk een bestelling gedaan bij een website voor wat airsoft spullen, spullen Maandag 13-05 ontvangen maar het is toch niet helemaal mijn ding, goed via de site een RMA aangemaakt alleen kreeg ik maar 2 opties dat was A ruilen en B een voucher, maar ik wil gewoon mn geld terug.
Contact opgenomen met de website, en die geven ook aan alleen een voucher te kunnen geven, voor het aanmaken van de RMA heb ik hun retour voorwaarden kort doorgekeken en dat ik zelf het retour moet betalen maakt me niet uit.
Dit staat er verder:
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RETURNS AND SUBSTITUTIONS
The Consumer is responsible for the decrease in the value of the goods resulting from handling other than that necessary to establish the nature, characteristics and operation of the goods. Therefore, if the returned goods are damaged (e.g. with signs of wear, abrasion, scratches, deformations, stains, etc..), not complete with all their elements and accessories (packaging materials, boxes), not accompanied by the original packaging and packing, the consumer will be responsible for the decrease in the value of the goods, and will be entitled to a refund of the amount equal to the residual value of the Product.
When the goods are returned, the consumer will be responsible for the decrease in the value of the goods, and will be entitled to a refund of the amount equal to the residual value of the Product.
When the returned product returns to our warehouse, we will proceed to quality control and we will provide to
issue a coupon amounting to the total or partial value of the product (*)
ship a new product (**)
If the Seller is obliged to reimburse the Consumer for all or part of the value of the product, the reimbursement will be made, where possible, by the same means of payment used by the Consumer when purchasing the Product. Pursuant to and for the purposes of the European Directive 44/99/CE and the Italian Legislative Decree no. 206/2005, the Seller guarantees the Consumer that the Products will be free from defects as well as in compliance with the descriptions published on the Website. All the products sold on the Site are covered by the manufacturer's conventional warranty and by the warranty of 24 months from the relevant delivery date for conformity defects pursuant to the above-mentioned regulations.
(*) The voucher will be issued if the goods returned had factory defects and signs of wear (abrasion, scratching, scratch, deformation, stains) the voucher will have a percentage discount equal to the total value of the goods less the percentage of wear and shipping cost.
(**) The shipment of a new product will take place only after ascertaining the real factory defect. Replacement items will not be shipped if quality control finds prolonged use (abrasion, scratching, deformation, stains)
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Ik dacht dat voor elke webshop in de EU 14 dagen bedenktijd gold en je dus gewoon recht hebt op een terugbetaling.
Webshop in kwestie > https://airsoftmania.eu/en-nl/policies/refund-policy
Waarde van de retour zou ong 60 euro zijn, heb betaald via Klarna.
Zou graag willen weten wat ik kan doen om alsnog mn geld te krijgen.

I literally have no one else to vent to so I'm gonna write this here. Well pretty much the title. I'm from India and here in college all branches have common subjects. So the first years are divided randomly into sections instead of their core branches/disciplines. We were in the same section. We randomly met and became friends. Then we became close friends. It was the first time someone showed so much affection to me. The way we spent hours together daily. The way she would skip over to the empty seat beside me before it was taken. Then we were seperated by our branches, meaning other than one common class, we didn't have any classes together. But we only grew stronger. We dated for almost 2 years. Reached levels of intimacy to the point there really wasn't any private space between us. And comes another guy, let's call him "S", into the picture. One day she tells me that S likes her and she gets uncomfortable from the attention she gets from him. I say I want to confront him but she keeps me from doing so as S is a dear friend to her. I didn't think much about it as she was someone I trusted with my life. I should point out that the 2 years we were together, it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows. We went through many fights and arguments. Ig she got closer to S during these times. Come April, we had our college fest. On the final night of fest we snuck out and went over to the less populated areas of the campus and made out. Then we spent about an hour with my head on her lap talking about things. I was sure this was it. The turning point from which everything would only get better. How fucking wrong I was. 3 days later I get a call from her, which by itself felt weird cause 90% of the time I initiated the calls, and she tells me S kissed her. I was dumbstruck. We kept talking and ultimately I asked her to make a choice between him and me. Ig most of you would have seen this coming (I didn't but no surprise there) but she chose to end things with me then and there. The entirety of the time between Jan to April, she must've told me she loved me atleast 10 times. And then she does this. To make it worse we had our finals that week itself. Needless to say I fucked it up, probably gonna fail a few subjects. But me being the weak pathetic fuck I am, kept begging her to talk things out and meet atleast once. Today (May) she says she might start a relationship with him. I'm honestly surprised beyond what I can described with words. It's like the girl I loved and treasured with my life died and there was an imposter in her stead. Because the girl I knew wouldn't break up with someone over text. She wouldn't act like this and she definitely wouldn't date someone else after saying "I love you" to someone within one month. This is honestly gut wrenching and I don't know if I'll ever date again.
Thank you for spending time out your life to listen to my little tragedy.
TLDR: My gf of two years dumped me and is looking to get into her next relationship within one month of the breakup

Today illustrated that the Democrats have become America’s cheerleaders, emphasizing how investment in the nation’s infrastructure has created jobs and rebuilt the country. This week, the Biden-Harris administration is touting its investments in rebuilding roads and bridges, making sure Americans have clean water, getting rid of pollution, expanding access to high-speed internet, and building a clean energy economy, contrasting that success with Trump’s eternal announcements of an “Infrastructure Week” that never came.
The White House today announced that it has awarded nearly $454 billion in funding from the Bipartisan Infrastructure Law, including more than 56,000 projects across more than 4,500 communities across the nation. Those include fixing more than 165,000 miles of roads and more than 9,400 bridges and improving more than 450 ports and 300 airport terminals. It has funded more than 1,400 drinking water and wastewater projects and projects to replace up to 1.7 million toxic lead pipes, as well as more than 8,000 low- and zero-emission buses. It has funded 95 previously unfunded Superfund projects to clean up contaminated sites. It has improved the electrical grid and funded 12,000 miles of high-speed internet infrastructure, and exposed internet junk fees.
The White House explained that this investment is making it cheaper to install clean energy technology and lowering families’ monthly energy bills, and highlighted today the available rebates to enable people to take advantage of the new technologies.
On Wednesday, May 8, a report from the Semiconductor Industry Association and the Boston Consulting Group explored the “breathtaking speed,” as the president of the semiconductor organization put it, at which the industry is growing. In the Financial Times on May 9, John Thornhill reported that the CHIPS and Science Act, which provided a $39 billion investment in the semiconductor industry, has “primed a torrent of private sector investment.” With the influx of both federal money and an additional $447 billion of private investment in 83 projects in 25 states, the report forecasts that the U.S. will increase its share of global manufacturing capacity for leading-edge chips from today’s rate of 0% to 28% by 2032. Thornhill compared this investment to that spurred by Russia’s 1957 launch of the Sputnik satellite.
The Economist yesterday announced that the U.S. “is in the midst of an extraordinary startup boom,” and explored “[h]ow the country revived its “go-getting spirit.”
In contrast to the Democrats’ confidence in America, the Republicans are all-in on the idea that the country is an apocalyptic wasteland. At a rally in New Jersey Saturday, Trump announced: “On day one we will throw out Bidenomics and reinstate MAGAnomics.” He promised to extend his 2017 tax cuts for the wealthy and corporations.
But the gist of his speech was an angry, vitriolic picture of a failing nation full of “enemies” that are “more dangerous” than China and Russia and who are “going to destroy our country.” In his telling, the criminal case against him in Manhattan is “bullsh*t,” and President Biden has done more damage than the “ten worst presidents in the history of our country” combined: “[h]e’s a fool; he’s not a smart man…[h]e’s a bad guy…the worst president ever, of any country. The whole world is laughing at him.”
Trump lied that other countries are “emptying out their mental institutions into the United States, our beautiful country. And now the prison populations all over the world are down. They don’t want to report that the mental-institution population is down because they’re taking people from insane asylums and from mental institutions.” Then he riffed into “the late great Hannibal Lecter,” the fictional murderer and cannibal in the film The Silence of the Lambs, apparently to suggest that similar individuals are migrating to the U.S.
House Republicans this week are working to pass a nonbinding resolution to condemn Biden’s immigration policies, although it was Republicans, under orders from Trump, who killed a strong bipartisan immigration bill earlier this year.
The only way to turn back this apocalypse, Trump and his supporters insist, is to put Trump and his team back into the White House. From there, Republicans will return those they consider “real” Americans to power.
The last few days have added new information about what that means. On Thursday, May 9, Senators Katie Britt (R-AL), Marco Rubio (R-FL), and Kevin Cramer (R-ND) introduced the More Opportunities for Moms to Succeed (MOMS) act. Britt—who is best known for her disastrous response to Biden’s State of the Union speech from her kitchen—said the measure would provide a federal database of resources for pregnant women and women parenting young children, but that information excludes anything that touches on abortion.
The measure is clear that it enlists the government in opposition to abortion, but more than that, it establishes that the government will create a database of the names and contact information of pregnant women, which the government can then use “to follow up with users on additional resources that would be helpful for the users to review.”
A government database of pregnant women would give the federal government unprecedented control over individuals, and it is especially chilling after the story Caroline Kitchener broke in the Washington Post on May 3, that a Texas man, Collin Davis, filed a petition to stop his ex-partner from traveling to Colorado, where abortion is legal, to obtain an abortion. Should she do so, his lawyer wrote, he would “pursue wrongful-death claims against anyone involved in the killing of his unborn child.” Now Davis wants to be able to depose his former partner along with others he says are “complicit” in the abortion.
Antiabortion activists are also seeking to make mifepristone and misoprostol, drugs used in many abortions, hard to obtain. In Louisiana, state lawmakers are considering classifying the drugs as “controlled dangerous substances,” which would make possessing them carry penalties of up to ten years in prison and fines of up to $75,000.
More than 240 Louisiana doctors wrote to lawmakers saying that the drugs have none of the addictive characteristics associated with dangerous controlled substances and warning that the drugs are crucial for inducing routine labor and preventing catastrophic hemorrhage after delivery, in addition to their use in abortions. “Given its historically poor maternal health outcomes, Louisiana should prioritize safe and evidence-based care for pregnant women,” the doctors wrote.
Louisiana lawmakers also rejected a bill that would have allowed anyone under age 17, the age of consent in Louisiana, to have an abortion if they became pregnant after rape or incest. Passionate testimony from those who suffered such attacks or who treated pregnant girls as young as 8 failed to convince the Republican lawmakers to support the measure. “That baby [in the womb] is innocent.… We have to hang on to that,” said Republican state representative Dodie Horton.
Today, at the Asian Pacific American Institute for Congressional Studies, a nonpartisan, nonprofit organization promoting Asian American and Native Hawaiian/Pacific Islander participation and representation at all levels of the political process, Vice President Kamala Harris encouraged young people to innovate and to move into spaces from which they have been traditionally excluded.
“So here’s the thing about breaking barriers,” she said. “Breaking barriers does not mean you start on one side of the barrier and you end up on the other side. There’s breaking involved. And when you break things you get cut. And you may bleed. And it is worth it every time…. We have to know that sometimes people will open the door for you and leave it open. Sometimes they won’t. And then you need to kick that f*cking door down.”
Harris’s advice reflects the history that happened on this date in 1862, when the enslaved mariners on board the shallow-draft C.S.S. Planter gathered up their families, fired up the ship’s boilers, and sailed out of the Charleston, South Carolina, harbor. The three white officers of the ship had gone ashore, leaving enslaved 23-year-old pilot Robert Smalls to take control. Smalls knew how to steer the ship and give the proper signals to the Confederates at Fort Sumter, Fort Moultrie, and three other checkpoints.
Smalls piloted the Planter, the sixteen formerly enslaved people on it, and a head full of intelligence about the Confederate fortifications at Charleston to the U.S. Navy. In Confederate hands, the Planter had surveyed waterways and laid mines; now that information was in U.S. hands. Smalls went on to pilot naval vessels during the war, and in 1864 he bought the house formerly owned by the man who had enslaved him.
A natural leader, Smalls went on to become a businessman, politician, and strong advocate for education. After serving in the 1868 South Carolina Constitutional Convention that made school attendance compulsory and provided for universal male suffrage, he went on to serve in the South Carolina legislature from 1868 to 1874, when he was elected to the U.S. House of Representatives, where he served until 1887. When President Barack Obama signed an executive order establishing the nation’s first national monument concerning Reconstruction, he cited the life of Robert Smalls.
—
Notes:
https://newjerseymonitor.com/2024/05/12/trump-brings-2024-campaign-to-the-jersey-shore/
https://www.esquire.com/news-politics/politics/a60774814/trump-rally-new-jersey-weird-speech/
https://www.britt.senate.gov/wp-content/uploads/2024/05/MOMS-Act_FINAL-Britt_Rubio_Cramer1.pdf
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/article/2024/may/11/katie-britt-proposes-federal-database-to-collect-data-on-pregnant-people
https://www.washingtonpost.com/investigations/2024/05/03/texas-abortion-investigations/
https://lailluminator.com/2024/05/08/rape-incest/
https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2024/05/13/abortion-pills-louisiana-controlled-substance/
https://www.economist.com/finance-and-economics/2024/05/12/america-is-in-the-midst-of-an-extraordinary-startup-boom
https://www.whitehouse.gov/briefing-room/statements-releases/2024/05/13/fact-sheet-biden-harris-administration-kicks-off-infrastructure-week-by-highlighting-historic-results-spurred-by-president-bidens-investing-in-america-agenda/
https://www.whitehouse.gov/briefing-room/statements-releases/2024/05/13/fact-sheet-president-bidens-investing-in-america-agenda-is-helping-american-families-across-the-country-save-money/
https://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/documents/icymi-the-great-american-innovation-engine-firing-again
https://www.ft.com/content/0d39e8f0-38ba-40aa-8ec8-d04e82afb690
https://www.nytimes.com/2024/05/08/us/politics/chips-grants-fuel-industry-growth.html
https://www.politico.com/news/2024/05/11/trump-rally-new-jersey-trial-fascists-00157482
https://obamawhitehouse.archives.gov/the-press-office/2017/01/12/presidential-proclamations-establishment-reconstruction-era-national
https://www.nps.gov/people/robert-smalls.htm
Twitter (X):
cspan/status/1790048826440503495
Fritschnestatus/1790051154887340473
rosiewestwood/status/1788291766866567439
CecileRichards/status/1789020452855140723
https://heathercoxrichardson.substack.com/p/may-13-2024

As If It Were Kismet: Prologue
Matt tore through the brush, blind in the dark. He didn’t care where he was going. He only knew he needed to be elsewhere. Far from here.
Behind him a creature howled that shocked his mind. It’s form was cruel and dangerous, though female. Nothing like the young woman she had once been. Nothing but a girl, a small and slight female.
It’s guttural growls and howls only grew closer as Matt tried to pick between seeing where he was going and getting away. The few times he looked he caught sight of the creature behind him. Hopping through the air with a speed that told him he was being toyed with. As if he were a mouse being played with by a cat.
But the reflex in him to run kept him going. His adrenaline going as hard as it could. The tightness and burning in his core tensing and locking up as his legs felt like there were being burned from within while taking on more of a heaviness.
His lungs were starting to betray him as he tried to gulp big breaths of air but only rapid and shallow breaths were all that he could manage. His brain was starting to burn….and then he was falling.
Falling down the side of a hill he saw the creature dart in a spring towards him, imperceivably fast almost. Catching him in mid air it seemed.
Managing to wrap its body around him and cushion his impact against the ground as they rolled. His mind barely took in what was happening during the roll. Only starting to understand what was happening once they were still.
The creature's triple D-cup breasts were unmistakably pressed hard against his back as he laid facing up at the night sky.
For a few seconds the world stilled and the needle light pain hitting the center of his brain took over for the cooking heat his brain had felt. His whole body felt heavy and reluctant to move.
Even if he could have really moved, a dull ache came over his limbs making them feel stilled and trapped as if by immeasurable amounts of sand that had engulfed him.
Slowly the arms holding him started to move. Moving so the creature's hands could start exploring him. Causing Matt to unstoppably let out a pathetic moan that made him go cold inside as hands lifted up his shirt and started to touch his exposed stomach and then his chest.
He would have whimpered so pathetically had he not still been in the depths of terror.
As its hands felt and groped his pecs he tried to situp as if to get away. For his efforts, his reward was a hand around his throat and a collection snarls and growls against his ear. A beastly, guttural voice spat words at him while somehow holding a feminine tone.
“Don’t move….I don’t know if I can calm down…”
Her words were not helped by her moans in his ear and the subsequent kissing of his ear. The flesh of his ear going between her lips as she moaned and seemed to pant. Releasing it and licking the side of his face with a moist warmth. He could feel its spittle, viscous and coating his flesh where the tongue touched. He could smell something in his saliva. Something that subtly entranced him.
Matt went stock still with fear and the confusion of mixed arousal. He barely perceived her right hand traveling lower on his body. A surprised moan and shudder echoed in the night from Matt’s lips as she took ahold of him. Her hand above his pants but still….stimulating him.
A light squeezing and almost probing of her digits kept him aroused and confused within her grasp. Resigning himself to the strange fate, Matt looked up at the stars as his mind tried not to shatter under the strange maelstrom of events and sensation that had started mere minutes ago.
His mind was only more confused as a slight figure, feminine in build, how it seemed to thunk the ground audibly as she landed on her feet out nowhere. Her knees barely bending under the pressure of the landing. Yet dirt was kicked up anyways and some of it onto Matt. Feeling it pepper his shirt and pants as it fell.
The figure, lit only faintly by moonlight, roared some dark tone Matt could only perceive as a demon as her eyes went bright with a crimson light. A light in the darkness that should not have been. “Let him go you bitch.” Was its words following the roar. Spittle escaping its mouth with faint droplets hit Matt's face.
The creature holding him by his throat and crotch seemed to tighten the grasp of both hands as it roared back. “HE IS MINE!”
The figure paused with a moment's hesitation. He was also her quarry. She had felt his fear without him knowing. His confused arousal. His fear. His terror.
And now he laid at the center of a struggle between two monsters. Unsure of who he wanted to win.
As If It Was Kismet Ch. 1
Matthew Berkshire hadn’t seen his mom in two years. Not that he had seen her much over the last six years.
A messy divorce between messy people and mom’s chaotic want for a life in Alaska had been one of the most…upsetting times in life. Setting him up for so much of what had defined his life thus far but then that had really started two years before he ever turned.
His ear buds were basic and simple. A part of cheap five pack, common for his life as he was known to lose little things. Small things. They had a mix of metal and hard rock playing in them. Some classics, some alternative. Whatever made him feel something, anything. Even if it was hate. Anger. Rage. It was better than feeling numb. Not belonging.
The escalator down to his lone bag to go with his lone carry on showed his mom waiting for him. His had a type, that’s for damn sure. Not that it helped him in the genetics department as he was stuck at 5’9” to go along with his mother’s five foot even as his dad stood six foot. Forever leaving him to feel small, to pale, under his dad’s shadow. Did he ever stand a chance?
The guy next to her with the unkempt former seventies porn stache was “Dave.” He’d met him twice when his mother came and visited him in Florida. To his credit the guy didn’t look annoyed. Kind of concerned kind of which made Matthew want to break his frozen look but he was well practiced. Having removed any note of sadness from his face through much…tribulation.
His mother’s look on her face betrayed a hint of worry as the bruises on his face lightly showed up close. Saying his name was his like a distant echo that belonged to someone else.
Dave cut in and pulled out his right headphone. “What the hell bud, they knock you hard enough to hurt hearing? Your mom’s asking how you are doing.”
Matthew pulled out the other bud and grunted an empty “sorry.”
“You still have bruises after two week? What did they do to you?” His mom’s voice was full of worry. Something he hadn’t heard in….too long. Too long to make him feel anything. To ever make him believe there was any sincerity to her words. To not think her voice and mannerisms were an act. An act by someone who…wasn’t really there.
“It’s only fair. I took a nose. Fractured a couple orbital bones. Left one with having to get his jaw wired shut. And one will never walk right again for what I did to his knee cap.” Matthew said it all with a bored and disinterested tone. Perhaps well rehearsed.
“My man, handing out ass kickings, not bothering to take names.” Dave was quick to be the typical man’s man about it. Matthew wasn’t quite done yet. Lifting up his shirt to expose the right side near his kidney. Revealing a nasty scar from a six inch blade. “Luckily they gave me this first so they could rule it all in self-defense. The fuck didn’t get it in more than inch before I ruined his knee cap and then I took the nose of one of the fucks holding me.” Now he chose to smile keeping the well practiced dead look in his eyes.
No retorts. No questions. Just horrified looks on their faces. As he liked. As he preferred. They could hate him. They could be disgusted by him. But by God they would fear him.
“Well the doc did a good job sewing you up.” Dave commented uncomfortably. “Dissolving sutures. Ain’t they grand.” He smiled again and let it abruptly fall off his face and started walking to the carousel for the baggage claim.
Waiting and making small talk with Dave as his mother stood in silence. He was not the little boy she abandoned. The little boy she left with an angry man. While never hitting him. Left him in constant fear till he turned twelve and just didn’t care anymore. Something snapped. Broke. And he didn’t care if he died. Didn’t care if he stole. Didn’t even care if he killed. He just knew not to get caught. Something left over from his grandfather’s wisdom which came to make more and more sense with each passing year of life since that thing inside him broke.
Finally his bag came around and Dave went to try first to grab it but Dave practically leapt ahead of him. “Is that your grandfather’s rucksack bag?” his mother asked in a perplexed voice.
“Figured it’s been around since Viet Nam. So it’d serve me better than any of the worthless stuff they called luggage.” Dave commented after Matthew’s words. “Well hell yeah I still got mine from Desert Storm. You know the first one.” Dave laughed and Matthew eyed him oddly. Be it in the south or whether it was Alaska, country boys are country boys he guessed.
The car ride to the two people’s house, as Matthew thought of them. Was uneventful and full of vistas he imagined metropolitan types wetting themselves over. At most they meant isolation to him. Furtherness from the world as there were no mountains in Florida. And what mountains he had last seen in another state had been when he was eight. Another life, to Matthew it felt like. A life alien to him.
As If It Was Kismet Ch 2
Dave and his mom’s place was some two story type tucked into a tree line far up an elevated point. It was by no means the highest point in the mountain but it certainly felt up there.
Rocks were where the driveway should have been Matthew thought. Grabbing his backpack and rucksack from Dave’s jeep was no hard thing for him. Matthew was in formidable shape for someone his age, maybe even five years older. He had gotten a mix of fairly big shoulders and arms along with the chest to go for it when compared to most kids his age. A side effect of working out at least twice a day. First thing in the morning, some time in the evening, and the school’s gym when had had a good semester in school before he had to leave Florida.
Dave tried to come up and help him but Matthew walked past him towards the house. His mom was not sure what to make of his demeanor. Matthew was not the sweet kind boy he had once been. But she had been gone from his life essentially for a long time.
Ushering him into the house she cracked some joke he did not hear. He was too busy looking about and seeing a mix of old outdated decorating mixed with the strange and odd flair of his mother. Color contrasting against drab and dated. Like brightly painting over an old home that was falling apart he thought.
“Your room is this way Mattie.” His mom brightly intoned.
Without expressing any interest he followed his mother. Still faced and nonplussed. Just going along with the current. Pushed and pulled with its roll like a piece of driftwood.
The room was simple. A single small bed. A set of rubber weights with a curl bar and barbells. “Your dad said you were into weight lifting so we got you a bunch of stuff. Dave says it looks like his department’s gym almost. The woman’s smile felt very alien to him.
“Thank you. I appreciate it. I’ve got most of my stuff from home.” Matthew starting unpacking his rucksack and pulled out cables of repetitive and mixed colors. A single plastic barbell handle. The ruck sack could be filled with water bottles for added weight during pushups he figured. Remembering a Michael Keaton movie he watched with his dad post-Batman movies where he played a convicted killer using plastic bags filled with water for weights.
Matthew caught movement outside his lone fairly large window that could let him step out onto the roof of the house given its layout.
He saw a number of people running together through what he guessed was the backyard of the property, not that it had any fences to mark boundaries
They wore clothes that looked similar yet different from each other at the same time.”Oh those are the Johnston’s. Really nice bunch of people. Been on the mountain for a long time Dave tells me.”
Matthew looked at the group of people running and noticed the lack of resemblance. “They are related?” Matthew quizzically asked. Seeing a black and possibly a hispanic person amongst the bland looking white people.
“Oh well they are all adopted but for one or two of them…besides the parents of course. The family has a long tradition of taking in orphans they say. Real nice of them to do that don’t you think.”
Matthew looked at his mother and the hosier accent made no sense to him as he arched his left eye brow. Her and his dad were both from Florida. Born and raised. Sure her parents were from New York city but…
Matthew shook his lightly without turning to look at his mother as his vision was grabbed by one of the runners in particular. A girl of moderate height. Soft brunette. A plain beauty he figured with a slim build….and lack of remarkable breasts and rear to make any note of but….girls in general were his type at his age.
She was pretty enough. He couldn’t deny that but he found himself transfixed by her visage.
But the way she turned and looked at him, especially at that distance felt very disconcerting to him. Even if she was smiling like…she was a taste of a bright shiny day. Somehow.
Matthew’s mom noticed the exchange and smiled to herself with closed lips. “Oh that’s Vicky. She’s your age I think. Very sweet girl, who does the charity functions. You know bake sales, blood drives, car washes and the like. I think you should get to know her. Might be good for you.”
A truck horn sounded a couple of beeps in rather succession. “Oh that must be Mack, he said he might come by later this evening but he seems early.”
Matthew’s mother turned and left his room. Leaving Matthew to exchange a few looks with the alluring Vicky as she turned her head away from him to talk to the others in her group and look back at him.
Still Matthew’s left eyebrow was arched. In a way that reminded him of Spock from Star Trek that he and his grandpa used to watch on some streaming service or another.
As he heard ambient chatter elsewhere outside the house he figured to check it out as the alluring sight of Vicky would be around he figured. It was dull to stare at artwork. He was a boy who preferred jet skis and the like. Something he could ride and enjoy immensely. Even if at times it got him stabbed.
As If It Was Kismet Ch 3
Matthew sauntered out of the house and down the rockway that stood in for a driveway.
A few new people had come over from what he could first surmise of the situation. As he got closer it was obvious they were indigenous people. A couple of grown men…and a girl?
She was mousey. Maybe five foot. Hiding behind glasses and a big camo jacket that was far too big for her. It looked made for a grown man and the backwards trucker hat on her head kept her long black a beautiful mess of sorts.
She was cute in a way. A little androgynous but she had a cute energy to her. She reminded him of the more tomboyish Puerto Rican girls he had gotten into back in Florida. Given the deer corpses in the back of the truck….probably more dangerous to play with given the men in her family.
Small chatter passed between the adults when the girl noticed but turned away, trying to hide the tiny hint of a smile.
“Oh Mattie, this is Mack. He works with Dave at the sheriff’s department and John, he’s with fish and wildlife.” Matthew nodded at his mom’s words with some blankness as he looked at the deer the in the back of the pickup truck.
“Gale tells us you hunted with your dad some in Florida and Georgia.” Mack offered with a light hearted laugh camouflaged by his big simple and cheery but husky way he spoke.
Looking in the back of the truck he spoke. “We used lever action thirty-thirties and Mosin Nagants in seven-six-two-fifty-four-rimmed.” Mack and John whistled in an exaggerated fashion. Leaving Matthew to wonder if they were mocking him.
Mack spoke. “Well we just used thirty-odd-six in a custom gussied Garand.” That caught Matthew’s attention. “You have a Garand…” Matthew finally demonstrated interest in anything. “My dad has an SVT-40 and a Hakim 8mm but he always wanted a Garand but was too cheap to buy one.”
Gale, his mother, chimed in loudly. “Oh his Dad loved his guns but was such an odd duck about how he bought or why he bought them. Never made sense to me how he wasn’t a collector but he didn’t get the latest and greatest.” Gale laughed uncomfortably. At least it seemed that way to Matthew.
Matthew pointed to the girl with an underhanded pointing hand. “And who is this? A cute little mute mouse or does she have a name?” Dave and the other men laughed.
Mack again spoke. “Well you people call her Rebecca, she’s my adopted daughter.” Matthew was taken aback by what he heard. “You people?”
Rebecca kindly spoke with a soft but almost melodic voice as she struggled to maintain eye contact. “White people or rather not members of our tribe. It’s just easier to appease the colonizer kind of thing. Borrowed from when the Jesuit missionaries chased us up here.”
Mack stepped in. “It’s just easier to have white people names than have them try to say our tribal names. And we don’t want them shortening or Anglicising our names kind of thing.” Rebecca stepped back into the conversation cutting off her adopted father. “It’s an insult to our history basically.”
Matthew cocked his head sideways raising his eyebrows shortly before letting them drop. “Well as soon as I’m eighteen I’m out of here and back to Florida so I’m a sort of involuntary colonizer of sorts. So I won’t be taking any of your land from you. The Seminoles on the other hand are still shit out of luck.”
Rebecca’s smile caused Matthew to reflexively smile. Mack made the moment more awkward. “See Becca, I told you someone off the reservation would like you some. You just have to be creative.” Mack laughed in a chiding manner…Matthew presumed. He sensed that he was the butt of some kind of cultural joke. Like marrying a white guy was some sort of insult or mark of shame. That kind of thing.
Rebecca turning away from him was not something he had been expecting. Her then getting in the truck in a huff left the group in a silence for a moment.
Dave spoke to break the awkward silence. “Well just bring the truck to work on Monday and leave it for me to grab up.” Mack acknowledged Dave and they started to get off as Rebecca looked at Matthew for another instance. Matthew couldn’t look away for some reason as the two seemed to lock eyes for an instance.
Till Vicky and family seemed to come jogging down the road. While Matthew’s eyes diverted from Rebecca’s. Hers did not till she realized he was looking elsewhere. And her vision found Vicky and what had been a hint of smile on her face turned glum and disappointed.
Matthew did not look away from the vision of Vicky but instead of a starry eyed fool looking longingly. It was a baffled look. Well baffled for him, with his eyes drawn narrow and night with a focus.
There was something about her…he couldn’t quite put a name too. The way she appeared to him. One second brunette. The next second blonde or blonde like. As if the color appeared in her air and disappeared in fractions of seconds. Much the same way her body almost seemed to…shift…very subtly…smoothly. A nicer bum. Larger breasts. And then back to a simple and plain form. Feminine no doubt. Attractive. But not so…remarkable.
As If It Was Kismet Ch 4
The next two days passed without incident. Nothing of any real substance or challenge to note.
Matthew got settled somewhat and started working out almost immediately. Exploring around the woods but Dave told him not to go far. Especially without a hunting rifle. Dave had left a simple semi-auto Winchester out for him. His bear gun as Dave referred to it with its four round magazine. But Matt figured till he got some practice with the rifle to leave it alone. He made a hiking stick like his grandpa taught him and treated it over a low fire. He would take some electrical tape for the end his hand would grip around. Plenty enough to ward off anything smaller than a bear he figured.
The ride to school was a pain in the neck but simple enough. Dave would let him use a clunker pickup truck he had laying around. It wasn’t pretty but it would get him to and from. Even if it was from the eighties and still backfired on occasion. But for now Dave and his mom took him on their way to the sheriff’s department.
It wasn’t much of a school. It wanted to be modern but its fifties original construction was very obvious. It serviced the pipeline families and familys’ of fisherman who worked the seasons in between their time at the pipeline.
Matt was to report to the principal for some reason Dave and his mom wouldn’t share. Which annoyed him but he figured it was to read him the law of land. Small towns with their big views of the outside world and like.
Dressed in jeans, a grey sweatshirt under a light jacket with steel toed boots set him more apart then he expected. His buzzed head didn’t help matters. Already he was feeling like a stranger in a strange land but he was quite strange after all. And he liked it that way. Normal people were so pathetically disappointing to him.
A secretary or assistant or some such led him to the principal’s office. Where it reeked of real wood that was old and fabric and upholstery that needed to be updated for the last twenty years, Matt figured.
“This is Matthew Berkshire, Principal Andrews.” The man was turned with his back to the door and he was quick to wave her off as he turned her around.
He was an older man. Fat and large. Tall with a body built like he had once been fit and a demeanour of annoyed and irate already as he fixed Matt with a scowl and look of disgust. Another worthless government whore. Matt thought to himself. His father and his grandfather had bestowed unto him a natural disrespect for government workers and the figures that wore unjustified authority as a shield but pretended the weight of the state was not at their back ready to crush all who resisted. Little figures of valor pretending to be mighty and alone but acting with the tyranny of the state and all the backing.
“Mr. Berkshire, please sit down.” His tone wasn’t unusually hostile, just gruff. As if he had better things to do.
Matt complied and took a seat in the chair while maintaining a friendly facade. Not everyone was an enemy. And not everyone needed to be an enemy. Even if anybody could be any enemy. There was no reason to make enemies you didn’t have to. Another of his grandfather’s bastardised wisdoms.
“Well I looked over you file and you have quite the history Mr. Berkshire.” Matt resisted qiuping back a joke. Instead he waited for Principal Andrews to continue as he remained nonplussed and looking as if he felt no need to respond. A simple head tilt with dead eyes looking back at the principle as if he was not even there would suffice.
Matt’s reaction or lack of a reaction rather made Principal Andrews only narrow his eyes with examination. He was not used to a kid not responding to him. Especially with his gruff and hard act going on.
“Well by all accounts you moved here after some problems at your last school. A fight broke out and you did some real harm to your fellow students it appears.” Of course, he would take the side of the perpetrators. School administrators always did. Especially when they weren’t white. Just a fact of the times. Cowardice and pathetic mediocrity was the way they leaned, like good government workers sucking the dick of Big Daddy government. Worthless whores.
Matt chose to reply. “Oh you mean the criminals that stabbed me. Got arrested at the hospital and then pled to felonies. Yeah Florida, with the American counties are good like that.” Principal Andrews went real still. No shame. No fear. No penitence. He didn’t like that.
“Well be it as it may Mr. Berkshire we don’t tolerate that kind of behaviour here…” Matt cut him off responding with a deadpan tone. “You mean self-defense meant to save one’s own life while the cowardly and pathetic school workers look on with zero interest but to keep their money rolling in and will allow known gang members with records of violent acts and crimes that should have them expelled many times over, where in certain Democrat counties such cowardice and idiocy empowered a couple school shooters?”
Principal Andrews looked at the Matt with a note of disgust. “Look here Mr. Berkshire, your beliefs matter not one bit here. This isn’t Florida. We don’t like our way of life being disrupted by outside agitators who have problems with authority.”
Matt did his best not to roll his eyes and let the older fat man drone own as he dead-stared him. Lifeless and without emotion.
The man came to a finish and Matt spoke up without having listened to him or paid him any attention. “Great now that’s taken care of. Can I please get to class and finish my sentence of two years at your wonderful school?”
Principal Andrews huffed and snorted before calling in Vicky. Vicky stood in the corner after entering with a quiet and seamless presence. Matt felt disturbed and tried not betray his feelings as the young Vicky was perceived and not perceived to be moving.
Principal Andrews made the introductions and Matt nodded back. She was to be his chaperone for the day. They had the same classes and she was to show him the ropes so to speak. The ins and outs of the school. The locations of their classes.
He recognized her. It was hard not to. The way her appearance seemed to shift fluidly almost. The petite and skinny brunette ever so lightly had a big bust and blonde hair with curves added when she seemed to shift before his eyes. Like watching a film but each frame had a different person.
Matt didn’t say anything about it. Even if he did he would only be acknowledging his crazed state, if he had one. If.
Unlike an obedient puppy dog he got up in a slow and awkward fashion and followed behind her as his oddly disproportionate frame allowed. Causing her a note of concern for some reason. As if she was seeing something she shouldn’t have been….Or he was just weird. And Matt could admit to himself he was just weird. Part of his charm, he would jest about it at times. Not that he had many people to jest to now.
As If It Were Kismet Ch. 5
Following Vicky into the hall off to their first class was simple. She exchanged small talk and he slightly smiled as if to obviously suggest he was just being polite.
Inside his head, Matt was trying to figure out if he was having a psychotic break. The way Vicky looked kept changing and he looked at the other people around him and they stayed the same.
He was searching his mind as they were walking. And thus he wasn’t paying attention to where he was looking and so fell to his face forward over his feet seemingly out of nowhere.
A series of laughs erupted as it sunk in that he was obviously tripped. Like in prison this was a challenge to his superiority. If he let this pass he would be mocked and sneered at by this same group of boys. He wouldn’t walk to them like he was going to do nothing like a little bitch.
In a rage he turned and punched the stomach of the first face he saw. Some typical blonde haired wannabe jock. He knew from experience not to aim for the ribs. Instead he needed to aim for where he thought the belly button was.
Yells and screams blindly echoed around him as his after the punch he followed up his elbow of the opposite arm slamming into the face of the jock. Harder than a fist, the elbow struck the jock’s jaw and seemingly dropped him against a locker. Just in time to catch an errant and soft punch to the nose that sure enough hurt but did little to slow him down as his dad had taught him to fight through the pain. Blood and scars happened. They were a natural consequence of life to a man.
Taking the punch and falling further into his red state Matt headbutted the punch thrower before another guy arm bared his throat from behind. Which he managed to get his grip on the arm over a letterman jacked and jerk the unprepared boy to the side with him still latched on.
A few feet away from the lockers Matt knew his only chance was to jump and push off the lockers and knock the boy to the ground and so he did. He heard a thunk of the boy’s skull bouncing off the ground and he turned to pull out of the grapple.
The beatings he had taken from his father, the grapples, being choked unconscious. Had prepared him for fighting little bitches who didn’t know what a fight was. It wasn’t gay porn with rabbit punch fists flying.
Blood was running down his face and the pain started to hit him as the threats had been eliminated. Only then did he remember to breathe. Taking breathes as Vicky came up to him with tissues and took a hold of his nose.
“Owww owww owww what the fuck my nose could be broken.” He said to Vicky as she pulled his head up and back.
“It’s ok Carl. It’s done.” Matt tried to look to see who Vicky was talking to. It was a boy taller than his 5’9” by more than a small margin. The boy eyed him bored and annoyed before speaking. “What happened here?” An unoriginal line but one Matt couldn’t be a smart aleck about. “Well you see there was an outbreak of tripping and we all tripped over my dick. It happens.” Matt was about to laugh when Vicky seemed to pull up while still gripping his nose causing Matt no small amount of pain which he audibly evidenced.
Vicky spoke in a tone he wasn’t expecting. As if she was accustomed to issuing orders. “Keep Iris away from the hall till we sanitize the site. We have blood from at least three people contaminating the site. And have Jake bring me a spare jacket and shirt for this moron.”
Carl seemed to acknowledge her orders and seemed to blink away. Maybe the punch hit harder than he expected. He had no time to wonder as Vick took her hand away from his and pushed him against the lockers. With ease he had not been expecting from her form and stature.
Before he could respond Vicky licked his blood covered chin and then his lips and spoke to him. “Focus on me you little blood bag.” Her tone had an annoyed yet feminine sneer.
“Look into my eyes. Look at me. You belong to me. You are just another food source in a collection of food sources.” Her eyes were a beautiful hazel Matt thought. Almost green. Pretty like jewels in some old treasure collections. The eyes he could get lost in before kissing her. Finally Vicky was just a slight and petite brunette and he thought she was beautiful.
She would make a hell of a girlfriend. Some cute thing he could see laying on the beach in Florida on their sides laughing and smiling before trading light kisses while hands wandered innocently. Before his mind could drift further he felt her lips on his. It took him a second to mentally grasp the kiss but his arms were around her back as her hands were at his sides. His eyes reflexively closed as he saw hers close.
It was ineffable to Matt. Beyond words, what was happening. The kiss, the moments beforehand. The way his brain tickled with electricity and gentle warmth. He had never had a kiss like this and he had traded more than a few kisses with at least a few girls.
The kiss was like a warm bath with his consciousness slipping beneath the surface. Their lips only parted to try new angles and approaches as Matt struggled to take in breath. It was a moment he could have stayed trapped in for….he didn’t know. But a curt throat clearing by another girl pulled them out of the moment.
The girl was taller than Vicky. Blonde. With slight curves. Vicky addressed her bewildered and gobsmacked, and perhaps a bit embarrassed. “Tina?”

There have been an increasing number of juniors visiting this sub asking for advice about writing essays. Below are some tips and advice for making your essay stand out as excellent. Feel free to ask questions because I will answer every single question in the comments.
I know from experience that many of you are struggling to identify a good topic for your essay. Conventional wisdom says to start by brainstorming a list of potential topics, and chances are, you have already started a mental list of ideas. You might think you only have a few choices for topics, based on your activities or experiences, or essay examples you read, or the rough draft you already started (or worse, that GPT started...). I advise, however, that you put down your list of topics and back away from it. Forget that exists for a moment. Seriously - thinking about this initial list tethers you to certain ideas that might not actually be your best options.
Now you can begin brainstorming with a clean slate.
Start with thinking about what you want to show in your entire application, not just one essay. Every single component in your app has one purpose – to tell more about YOU. Filling out the rest of the application by rote and focusing solely on the essay is short-sighted and will leave so much potential untapped in your application.

It's About You. Tell Your Story - And Be The Protagonist

An admissions officer’s goal is to understand you fully, in the context of your background and the rest of the applicant pool. They will begin this with assessing your academic abilities and potential. Then they will evaluate how you will fit into the student body they’re trying to curate. All of this can be somewhat broad and diverse and touch on several institutional goals. But they will dig deep to find out what each applicant is like, what your core values and motivations are, what kind of student you will be, how you will contribute to the vibrant and intellectual campus community they’re building, etc.
Your goal with essay brainstorming is to ascertain how to powerfully tell your story in a manner that will fit these criteria. The entirety of your application (again, not just one essay) aims to showcase your abilities, qualifications, and uncommon attributes as a person in a positive way. Before you begin outlining or writing your application, you must determine what is unique about you that will stand out to an admissions panel. All students are truly unique. Not one other student has the same combination of life experiences, personality, passions, or goals as you do. Your job in your application is to frame your unique personal attributes in a positive and compelling way. How will you fit on campus? What personal qualities, strengths, core values, talents, or different perspectives do you bring to the table? What stories, deeper motivations/beliefs, or formative experiences can you use to illustrate all of this?
It is always helpful to start with some soul-searching or self-examination. You might not immediately know what you want to share about yourself. It’s not a simple task to decide how to summarize your whole life and being in a powerful and eloquent way on your application. Introspection prior to starting your application takes additional time and effort rather than jumping straight into your first draft. But it is also a valuable method to start writing a winning application that stands out from the stack.
You'll see the advice everywhere that all essay prompts are really about the same thing - you. The goal of each essay then is to showcase who you are, what matters to you, and how you think. I guarantee if you're on this sub enough, you'll hear the advice to "show, don't tell" when writing about yourself. But what does this mean really, and how do you do it well? How do you even get started on an essay that does this?

Introspection Questions

It’s often easiest to start thinking in terms of superlatives, especially those related to personal insights -- what are the most meaningful things about you, and what do you value the most? Here is a list of questions to help you brainstorm broadly before you narrow down your focus for writing:

• What are your interests?
  
• What sparks your curiosity?
  
• About what topics do you enjoy reading?
  
• With whom do you enjoy spending time? Who has impacted your life the most?
  
• Reflect upon “superlatives” in your life. What moments were most memorable, formative, enlightening, enjoyable, or valuable? What physical possessions, experiences, dreams, or lessons could make your superlatives list?
  
• Stop and think about what things, people, or circumstances in your life are really unique, fascinating, or outlandish. Are there any that really have a lot of "cultural flavor" (whatever your culture is)?
  

I have a free introspection worksheet with over 100 questions like this designed to help you find ideas worth exploring in your essays. You can find it on the A2C Discord or download it directly here.

Find Your Story And Arc

Think of a small anecdote or story from your life that you could share that serves as a microcosm of who you are and what is important to you. It will massively help you narrow this down and find a gem of a story if you first start by thinking about your application arc or theme. This is the one-phrase summary of your entire application. It could be "brilliant entrepreneur who started her own successful business" or "talented athlete who wants to study economics and finance as they pertain to sports", or even "avid baker whose hobby sparked an interest in chemistry". It doesn't have to be related to your intended major, but it can help your arc be stronger and clearer if it is.
Once you have an arc determined and a story to share, think about what you want that story to say about you. This is where it can help to think of this as something you would share on a date - what impression does it make about you to the reader? Once you know this, start showing, not telling this attribute of yourself through your story. For example, instead of saying that you're compassionate toward others, you show an example of a time you were compassionate, then elaborate on why, and what it means to you.

Essay Brainstorming Techniques

If you are having trouble finding a story, or simply have writer’s block once you have picked your topic, here are some ideas to get your juices flowing:

• Stream of consciousness writing -- Start writing whatever is in your head, and don’t stop for 30 minutes. You probably won’t use what you just wrote for your essay, but it will help you find a starting point.
  
• Journaling -- Answer the prompt as if you were writing in a journal. This will get you in the habit of writing about yourself and establish comfort with the concept. It will also take you to a new level of introspection and self-awareness.
  
• Twitter X style -- Write several rapid-fire responses to the prompt in 280 characters or less. Choose an idea from these responses to expound upon in your essay.
  
• Read each essay prompt, then go through your introspection worksheet responses and connect the stories and insights to one or more of the prompts. Some students like using color coding to visually see how their different ideas might work together.
  

Why Essays Matter

Here's the thing a lot of people don't realize about college admission: it's not an award for being the smartest, most accomplished, or most impressive. It's an invitation to join a community. Far too many students think that if they can just show that they're smart enough, they'll get in. Yale even says right on their admissions website that 75% of their applicants are academically qualified to succeed at Yale. But only ~4% are getting in. That should tell you that they're looking for more than just top tier test scores and grades. To be perfectly clear, you will need top tier grades and (optionally) test scores to show that you're qualified, and the vast majority of my students come to me with this part already in the bank. But what sets the admits apart? It's personal insight - sharing who you are, how you think, what matters to you, and how you engage community. You can't just say "/IAmVerySmart, please admit me," or even "I did a cool thing guys! Isn't that neat!" You need to go deeper and show them your core values, personal strengths, motivations, aspirations, character traits, foundational beliefs, personality, etc. And you need to do it in a charming, winsome way that makes them like you and want to invite you to join their community.
So how do I get students to do this? All of my students complete that introspection worksheet. We go through it and find the stories, examples, anecdotes, conversations, memories, relationships, and other things from their life that will help us craft a strong and personally insightful narrative. We also make lists of the values, strengths, and key personal qualities we want to showcase. Once we have some topics, outlines, abstracts, or rough drafts, we talk about which stories to tell where, how to tell them well, and what details to include to present the best they have to offer. Then we refine, edit, polish, and enhance over and over until the story sings, but more importantly shows their heart and soul. We also go through all the other application components to ensure consistency, quality, and distinctiveness.
Here's why this works so well: at most highly selective colleges there is a primary reader (or 2-3) who will review everything first and then present it to the admissions committee, who then votes on whether to admit you. That presentation typically goes one of three ways:

1. Total enthusiasm, energy, and excitement. They strongly advocate for admission and paint a clear picture of how you will contribute to their goals and community. Everyone in the room picks up on that energy and is leaning forward in their chairs, looking for reasons to admit you. This is quite rare, generally less than 5 out of every 100 applications, even among those which are "fully qualified." When you do this right, you show depth, meaning, and valuable personal insights so the reviewer is learning about who you are and how you might engage the community they're curating. You come alive off the page as a person, not just another file.
   
2. Business as usual. You're another great applicant in a pile of great applicants. They share a basic review of the facts, your profile, stats, strengths, weaknesses, etc. Maybe someone on the committee finds something they love, and they really push for admission. More likely, not and you get deferred/waitlisted even though there wasn't anything "wrong" with your application. They just didn't love you enough to commit.
   
3. "Here's a stack of 20 applications that I didn't find all that compelling, so we won't present them individually, but you guys are the committee and you make the decisions. So let me know if there are any you want to talk about." In this case, unless there's a letter of endorsement from an athletics coach or your last name matches several buildings on campus, you're probably not getting additional consideration, much less admission. They will regret to inform you.
   

Everything we're doing is designed to help them get to know themselves, present the best they have to offer, and land in that first group. Having top tier essays is the single best way to get there. Get started on brainstorming in the next few weeks so you'll have time to get a few essays completed over the summer.

Brother me and my girlfriend started dating in 2015 both 15 , we moved in together at 21- as of now basically almost 24* (im 23 shes 24 , a couple months older) , she had her own dark world and toxic household and so did i. Difference is i had a complete “family” , she was raised by her mother who treated her indifferent because she is her dads twin. She gave the most purest and sweetest love . It even gives me chills to write about it. She surprised me countless times , validated my feelings , took care of me more than own mother did bro. She put her ass on the line for me whenever and vice versa. We traveled to her country mu country and countless other places at a young age all alone . Im gonna be honest i cheated by grabbing another girls ass in 2018 and a year later in 2019 the girl from hs called her to tell her and she waited for me in my house but i was such a coward i kept denying and denying even though she knew exactly what had went on. Fast forward in 2021 shit got so rough my family always hated her for no reason (jealousy is a real thing bro) and so much happened. And imma be honest in 2022 i was taking care of her since we moved in together but 2022 i told her quit her job around early January February i told her i got us cause i found a job paying great so why not? That was my baby you know? So that year i went to a whorehouse with this dumbass loser i was working with and i fell for the temptation. Mind you this was a bad year for her she gained weight up to 260 and her family (mom and sister) they always treated her like shit and always was jealous of even me getting her stuff and just loving her and supporting her. Im not gonna lie yes i cheated and she found out about it the same day cause i fell asleep and went through my phone. My dumbass recorded a voice note that those whores can’t even give oral correctly they use all teeth , so when she found out that was a dealbreaker. Bro i destroyed her with that and i know i fucked up so bad this chick had a hot meal from scratch ready for me every single day after work.
Anyways fast forward to 2023, she told me when i get a job i got you and everything you ever did. She got the gastric sleeve surgery in September 2022 so 2023 in February she had started losing weight drastically and then eventually got a job the same month. Brother she was destroyed and still gave me food everyday still helped me still gave me sex just still was trying not giving up. I unfortunately didn’t see it this way due to my own internal problems and trauma and my selfish and stupid ways. Anyways even for my bday she took me to miami wasted $3k on the trip and it was amazing. Eventually it got toxic i got fired around October and i wasn’t really fully employed after that for a while so she had to pick up alot and my egocentric ass said hey i did it for you whats the problem a couple months you hold me down? (She should of been left me) but it got toxic and the stress from work her family me and me not working she was crashing out she would spazz on everyone and i dont blame her looking back she was just going though alot. We started cursing eachother out really bad and even got physical. Not fists punch or slaps just grabbing eachother , breaking stuff, throwing stuff out, breaking property.
Anyways for her birthday we went to paris (February 2024) and it was great till we argued (i really shouldn’t have gone cause i got a job in February the whole month and first month on the job i requested a week off already and i lied saying it was something else but it was really this trip i had) anyways after this trip she someway somehow forced me to quit my job because i was out from 6am-7pm everyday monday through Friday. March came and dont get me wrong guys my family i am blessed enough that they were sending me little amounts of money here and there to get me through they know i needed to pay rent food etc. march came and someway somehow when she said something to me she slammed the door and walked out so i immediately reacted and then slammed the door open to chase her . I come back the whole door is ripped off the frame . All the hinges ripped off. I ran away like a coward because she kept screaming at me and cursing me out saying you gotta replace it now but i didnt have 1$ to my name and im asking my mom and she is being a bitch on purpose. Long story short that was march 23rd i get arrested 4 days later because of property of destruction and then get out on limited order of protection. We ran into eachother a couple days later and we spoke she invited me over and i lived with her again the whole month of April.
Anyways in april im still just relying on my parents at this point because all these jobs im applying for are not in my favor to respond to me (no one hit me back up) . So towards the end of the month literally the Sunday before the 1st of May we get into another heated argument she said you dont do shit around here you a grown ass man this that and that and tbh bro i can show you my cashapp my mother send me like $1500 that month and every time she would send me $100 here or $300 there for food or something she would tell me waste it on weed. (We kinda of had a weed addiction we were wasting $40 a day 7days a week on weed, you do the math) so anyways most of the money my mom is sending me is being spent very inconsiderately and bad . I didnt think much of it cause i thought hey fuck it man im here whatever she wants to make her happy.
Anyways fast forward after the argument sunday before may 1st the weekend before may 1st i leave again because it got so crazy i wasn’t trying to spazz out so i walked out and left. Monday she tells me come back ik your mom isnt cooking im not heartless i still wanna be friends with benefits or friends . Whatever she said and also she said i built this bond with you no one knows me like you do. (We lost our virginity to eachother , we literally told eachother our deepest darkest secrets , met eachothers families, did all this together was very intimate) so i went back and as she said we ate we cuddled etc. the next day after work we go out the whole day because her and mom and sister arent on good terms i forgot to mention we lived in a basement and her mother on the 1st floor. The whole month of april they were on bad terms (just walking by eachother not even talking or acknowledging eachother) so we go out the next day after that Tuesday before May 1st. After work we do all that and come back home at 6/7 ish . I havent checked her phone in ages cause i fucked up alot and honestly i kind of had a feeling if i did i was gonna see exactly what i was looking for.
Anyways i still did it cause im a stubborn hardheaded motherfucker, and ofc i saw her texting sexual with some guy she told me she was talking as friends on and off for since November. The convo went like him: im dying to find out i just wanna carry you on top of me , her: omg i forget you’re so tall i love it , him: omg i forget you’re so short i love it, her: Stoppppp omg with the emojis, him: plus if you aren’t gonna wear that dress when we go out atleast where it when you invite me over :p , her: lol i guess im small ( she posted a picture in a shirt blouse showing her curves and body and curly hair) , bro i saw this and went back inside from checking her phone in the middle of the road and said is this what you’re doing to me ? Are you serious? She laughed in my face and said well you’re reading it aren’t you? I lost it and spit in her face and called her a nasty you know what just like her sister. How shes just like her sister (her sister fucks any guy to fill her void and to get money/gifts in exchange. (Going back as to why they weren’t on good terms in april her and her sister got into a physical fight because her sister wore her deadstock jordans i got her from 2018 that are now worth $700 and fried them . What blew my mind during the fight was her sister looked and me straight in the eyes that day and said i know alot about you as if she got something on me. That made me wonder alot. Also she called my ex gf a slut which made me think what the fuck) anyways fast forward after i catch her cheating on me she chases me in her underwear for 12 blocks and im toying running around cars with her at that point and i threw her phone on the ground and she ran right past it. Long story short i got arrested and now im facing a felony cause of that and its no contact as of rn till July when this court date happens. I miss the fuck out of her and regardless of anything i wish her the best and miss her dearly . Side note my brother showed me she was what appeared on a date Yesterday

So our friendgroup was sort of a quadrat, but one kinda committed suicide back in year 10 so we just became a triplet.
My friend, let's call him Bradley bc it makes me giggle.
we've been friends since year 9, we're all at the end of year 12 now. We were really close right up untill he went to college with my other friend (i stayed in 6th form), and I accepted it like he's a bad texter so ofc we're not gunna be that close anymore since he never texts me back or calls first or something, but it's the way that he will publicly post himself talking with other people and going out everyday and the only time he will ever call me is if he's drunk or high and our other friend refuses to pick up. I text the other friend everyday, we call and go out regularly despite both of us being busy w other subjects, we communicate. He doesn't do that. Whenever he calls me I have to wonder if it's because he's in trouble and needs help. One time we went out together to meet these people we didn't really know, and they were smoking weed, I told him not to because I had to leave early and I couldn't take care of him and he smoked anyway so I just left since I thought it would be fine, but later I get calls and texts from his mum asking where he is and I hadn't seen him in 11 hours at that point so I start calling and texting everyone else, thinking he's dead or something idk (my friend died, I got a weird thought process).
He's a very socially deprived person, so I feel like when he went to college and wasn't bullied anymore, he became so obsessed with being popular and his social image. He was abit like that before but now he's just a total dick. He will make fun of girls and everytime I do something that's slightly cringe or I'm just having fun, he'll make me feel bad abit it and call me cringe or make fun of me. Whenever I call him to say i miss him and just wanna talk, he doesn't really pay attention or talk much, like I'm being boring or smthn but maybe that's just me overthinking.
He's always making it out to be like he's a victim too. Okay I might be petty, but in the end of year 10 we were meant to be working, and he struggled abit with talking so I decided to work with him (we were meant to be doing a work shop for year 7s), and I did all the work and presenting, so idk maybe he got bored and started bothering other groups, and he got told off by both me, the teacher, and my other friend so instead of coming back to sit by me and just help me, he sat at a table, sulked for half an hour with his head on his arms and then left. And later I go up to the office because I'm concerned about him and wanna check up on him and he's crying in there next to the teacher, the teacher forces me to apologise and I just forgive it and move on. Kinda petty but I'm still mad ok. Also when it was the summer holidays, and this was the same year our friend killed herself, he decides to cut off speaking to both me and our other friend, for absolutely no reason. He's still online on insta too. He's still posting his chats with this other random girl so we're obviously like wtf. He refuses to speak to us and so I'm obviously very very concerned and think he's about to kill himself of something (wack mindset but I was like 14), so I walk all the way over to his house twice (my friend was away in London at the time but was still on the phone with me checking up on him) and both times he's sat in his room, doesn't look at me, doesn't speak to me, and at one point he started crying (??) So I just patted him on the back and left after abit.
He used to be a really sweet kid, I think he just became so obsessed with being popular and having fun, he's day drinking now and constantly posting about getting high and drunk because he thinks it's "cool", and I responded to his story, all I said was like "Bradly pls", because it is quite embarassing and he blocked me on that account.
That's another thing too, if I say anything that even slightly hurts his feelings he gets mad and doesn't let go of it, but whenever he says things that genuinley hurt me, he refuses to apologise so I end up having to just left go of it. Like when I had horrible body issues and always wore a jacket, until I took it off one day in class bc it was hot and he called my arms sausages. He also had body image issues and disordered eating so idk if he was like projecting or something ??
But I feel like I've just had enough now, I haven't spoken to him in months, I'm speaking with a girl now and she's great, we're going on a date soon, I'm doing well in school with a proper plan for uni and I feel like I'm just at peace with my life, but I can't just leave him because he's my best friend and he was THERE, and i can't just let him throw his life away because hes too busy having fun to go into his lessons and study, but it's impossible to help him, we've all tried, but like I can't just ignore that or forget about him, I think I can forgive all of this if he changes but it's doubtful he'll just suddenly change soon so I just decided to cut him out of my life, but everytime I see something like him using the scarf I crocheted for him or the handwarmers I made, or our pictures on his wall it just makes me feel so guilty and sad because it makes me remember how we all were together, and I miss that so much and I don't know how to get it back. But idk.

So I (F16) met this guy (M18) he’s from my schools sister schools and we met at a school party a month ago. He asked me for my socials after i complimented his outfit. Him and i are in the same grade and are only one year apart and get along really well, we’ve been texting every single day anywhere between 10 minutes to 2 hour long texting cessions. The best part is we really get along, we have similar music taste, we both do sports, we both have fairly good grades, like similar things, our biggest disagreement was on wether or not spiders or ants were less scary lmao. I don’t really think we fall into friends because we’ve been what I assume to be flirty (asking me if I’m dating anyone, liking my fit checks, hearting pictures we send each other, complimenting our looks and so on) and according to my friends that might fall under being a “talking stage” or a “situationship”
Well yesterday I texted him fairly late to ask him about his day like I usually do but he didn’t see it until the next morning where he answered telling me he had fallen asleep early last night and then casually told me something fun that happened during his day, I ended up asking him a few hours later when I finally opened his message (I didn’t know what to answer so I just didn’t open my socials that day) I ended up just saying that his day sounded like more fun than I did lmao and then asked “btw, wanna hang out sometimes” which he just answered “yuh, why not”.
I have no clue wether or not this means he actually wants to or if he might just be saying that to be nice, I’m actually really confused (I’m autistic btw) and I’ve just been not opening my phone at all for the last two hours since I don’t know how to react and don’t want to leave him on read. On top of that I can only hang out with friends when I’m at my dads which will be in 11 days and he already told me a week before about another subject that he never made plans until one or three days before when the plans happen and I wouldn’t want to make him uncomfortable by asking him so far beforehand.

1. What his message might mean and what I should answer
2. Wether or not he’s even interested in me
3. And if he is, wether or not I should try to make plans with him

TL;DR a guy I’ve been in a situationship with who I only socialize through text answered to me asking him to hang out with me in what I think is a disinterested way and I don’t know how I’m supposed to answer
(Edit for clarity)

So I (F16) met this guy (M18) he’s from my schools sister schools and we met at a school party a month ago. He asked me for my socials after i complimented his outfit. Him and i are in the same grade and are only one year apart and get along really well, we’ve been texting every single day anywhere between 10 minutes to 2 hour long texting cessions. The best part is we really get along, we have similar music taste, we both do sports, we both have fairly good grades, like similar things, our biggest disagreement was on wether or not spiders or ants were less scary lmao. I don’t really think we fall into friends because we’ve been what I assume to be flirty (asking me if I’m dating anyone, liking my fit checks, hearting pictures we send each other, complimenting our looks and so on) and according to my friends that might fall under being a “talking stage” or a “situationship”
Well yesterday I texted him fairly late to ask him about his day like I usually do but he didn’t see it until the next morning where he answered telling me he had fallen asleep early last night and then casually told me something fun that happened during his day, I ended up asking him a few hours later when I finally opened his message (I didn’t know what to answer so I just didn’t open my socials that day) I ended up just saying that his day sounded like more fun than I did lmao and then asked “btw, wanna hang out sometimes” which he just answered “yuh, why not”.
I have no clue wether or not this means he actually wants to or if he might just be saying that to be nice, I’m actually really confused (I’m autistic btw) and I’ve just been not opening my phone at all for the last two hours since I don’t know. On top of that I can only hang out with friends when I’m at my dads which will be in 11 days and he already told me a week before about another subject that he never made plans until one or three days before when the plans happen and I wouldn’t want to make him uncomfortable by asking him so far beforehand.

1. What his message means and what I should answer
2. Wether or not he’s even interested in me
3. And if he is wether or not I should try to make plans with him

(Edit for clarity)

I’ve been seeing a therapist for several years now, started in July 2020, and it’s been helpful over these years. However, in our most recent session wherein we discussed dating and issues surrounding that, a comment was made that just made my face cringe and left me feeling very uncomfortable. I was pleading my case about how difficult it can be to find someone to connect with in an organic way, and I’m not sure how we ended up at the comment, but it was this “women are under attack now more than every, especially since the reversal of Roe v Wade.” She furthered her point that women are waiting longer than ever to have kids, with some waiting till 30+.
I responded in some disjointed way (I was genuinely caught off guard) about how culture is the true issue, and we use to have a society that valued family’s and family formation. I also made a comment stating that it feels like, for millennials and younger generations, that we stretch the “childhood” phase well past what is healthy and good for ourselves, I.e. young men and women still partying/drinking/not taking on responsibilities well into their late 20s. I didn’t want to get into an argument right at the tale end of our session, but internally outright rejected the notion she was putting forward that (here’s my internal thoughts) because we have to be more selective on when we have sex and who we do the deed with, that this is an attack on women. Just feels like a very old “sexual liberation” trope on her part.
I’ve never had a strong stance on this issue. I’d likely fall into the 16 week ban camp if pressed on it, but regardless of my direct opinion, I felt very indirectly judged for even having such a thought. I noticed myself becoming uncomfortable as we talked about the next meeting, and I found myself arguing to myself about this as I drove home, and it made me question if I should even go back.
I understand abortion is a complex issue in modern America, and so I didn’t appreciate her outright dismissal of the thought that maybe there is some good coming in the form of saving millions of lives and generating millions of new families. The way she framed it as an “attack on women” just made me feel very out of place.
I’m wondering if anyone has found themselves in a values/politics mismatch, whether on this topic or another, and how you proceeded?? I want to, and plan to go back, but I’m wondering if I need to clear the air now.

One of the main proportions of socialists point of view it the cross between telepathic response and science.
While telepathy is a written and vocals mainstream idealism and science being the barrier between intelligence and discovery. Telepathy and science go hand in hand at some points of opinions. The brain is made up of abilities and ideas that wrap around a few million stimuli that are smaller than you can see and even smaller when reaching an age after realizing the realism in how the world works and talks to itself. It’s only a matter of time before you realize talking with the mind and understanding the abilities of connecting and getting the correct image in mind are scientifically proven to interact within the mind to produce an outcome known to us as our livelihood or our given written future. Advances through the mind allow a picture to be discovered through practice and mellow dramatic response. The brain makes stimuli and represents them as gardens or floral pieces in the mind. Connecting through many wave frames of other garden pieces before the realism that you are amongst millions and billions of others with the same interaction at different realisms of time.
Scientifically we are made up of roses that tie our brains into structured development used to create a future or sub reality of the time. Chemicals are only real when you want them to be. While the mind slowly wraps around the sequence of time to uprise the future possibilities turning in clockwise rotation.
Mentally we discover talking and prayer to be an arguable amount of the same idealism. While some are argumentive that they are not the same and are entirely prismed around the idea of praying is only for god or god related acts. The truth behind realizing whether or not you talk to god ends the argumentive rights that you have developed around… telepathy is the given statement that you talk with your mind and understand the ability of knowing what everyone is telling you and themselves. Being young is presumed unknowing or not realizing that everything has a multiplicative development of the time. Everything someone says is sometimes directed in a single possible answer of what the person is trying to talk towards them.
Sticky is one word that describes the mentality of the time of day and age we were born and grown up to. We are a dying age of realizing where our actions have developed and are forwarding us to fix and create a better future. Within understanding that you talk to god and everyone around you through prayer is the telepathy and science differential trait. Crossing the two methodologies is the beginning to our continued story developing in our hands.
Leave comments and a response if you enjoyed this read. I had a lot of fun writing this short response to my interests about growing up and adulting. I will be writing more based on the type of response you all give me. So like share and follow!
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-k<3
05142024

DAY: MAY 13, 2024

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I run two groups, one in person, the other on Foundry, both on PF2e.
The Foundry group is comprised of players from a DnD campaign I've run on and off for a couple of years plus a few people I met at work. This group includes two of my best friends who live in other states, and the husband of my wife's best friend's husband. This will be referred to a the VG (Virtual Group). I run a pre-made foundry module, so there is basically no prep outside of reading the adventure and making sure I've got the story straight and work everyone's hook into it. Despite the ease of running in Foundry, This is my more stressful group.
The In-person group is a collection of guys I did not know but met through a local dad group and Reddit. All are fathers (I wanted folks who 'get it' when it comes to time management and scheduling). Great group, and will be referred to as IPG (In-person group), and even though the prep is more (drawing maps, selecting the right minis for the session, a lot more book-keeping to track encounters, etc.) This is my less stressful group.
I run these groups on alternating weeks.
Why is the in-person group less stressful? Scheduling. I have set up shared google calendars for people to suggest new sessions if a scheduled session doesn't work for them. This is because trying to pick and match dates from group texts or discord chats is time and labor intensive on top of everything else i do for the games.
A Case Study:
VG had a bunch of issues with this week's schedule. I asked everyone to put dates that work for them in the calendar so i can see what works for a quorum. I got 2 out of 6 players to do that. Everyone else, despite me literally saying 'do not respond by text, please use the calendar' - tried to text me dates. Basically, nothing this week worked, i had to confirm by text (which, again - I STRONGLY AND CLEARLY STATED I would rather not have to do). So, reschedule for next week was eventually confirmed, but took 12 hours of texting communication. I also have two people who i have to hound to respond and confirm dates - despite me being very clear almost every other week i need communication to improve on their end if they want to play because it makes it easier for me to plan with my family.
I asked IPG, a group of 5 people, if they would have any interest in meeting this week since next week was rough for a few of them. I had something rescheduled for the NEXT DAY with confirmation from every member within 5 hours. They responded quickly and clearly and confirmed the plans with their partners and families as soon as they were available.
I am really considering just letting the VG fade away - a couple of my closest friends are in the group, but organizing the game feels like more of a chore and TBH, I simply prefer to play with the group of guys I've only known a few months. They write excellent characters with good motivations and backstories. They make an actual effort to RP consistently, they work well as a team. I get VERY VERY little of that from the VG despite a few of those players being decidedly more experienced in the table-top space. IPG guys wrote character backgrounds that were so thorough and based on the campaign players guide that i literally did not need to write any of them hooks, they inserted themselves into the setting and campaign almost seamlessly. They straight up read the Lost Omens guide sections relevant to their characters for deeper lore.
When VG group was asked if they bothered to read a 10 page players guide (With lots of pictures) for their setting everyone chuckled and acted like it was a ridiculous ask.
So yeah, part rant, part 'teachable moment' for players who love to play - please listen to your GM when they ask for better communication, to use scheduling tools, and suggest you read about the setting or world before you build a character.

IRVINE, CA — In a surprising turn of events, David Kim, Senior Game Designer at Uncapped Games and former lead multiplayer designer for StarCraft 2, has promised to address a decade-old grievance just before the big reveal of his new game. Known for his controversial introduction of the Swarm Host unit in SC2—a unit widely blamed for ruining the game's balance and the sanity of countless players—Kim has announced a bold plan to make amends.
"I'm here to right a wrong," Kim proclaimed in a pre-reveal livestream, drawing in thousands of hopeful yet skeptical viewers. "For too long, the Swarm Host has been a source of contention. Many believe it broke the game, but I believe it broke something even more important: our spirits. Today, I give you all the chance you never had."
With a dramatic flourish, Kim unveiled the first new unit for his upcoming robot combat game: the Nano-Swarm Host. The reaction from the audience was immediate and visceral. Chatrooms erupted in a mix of horrified disbelief and cynical amusement.
"In StarCraft 2, the Swarm Host was misunderstood," Kim explained, showing off the sleek and metallic, mushroom-esque concept art for the Nano-Swarm Host on the screen. "It was nerfed far too soon and players didn't have the opportunity to truly learn how to counter it. That opportunity was taken from you, and for that, I apologize. But now, with the Nano-Swarm Host, you can finally reclaim your honor and master the strategy that eluded you for so long."
The Nano-Swarm Host, much like its predecessor, spawns endless waves of free units—this time, as a cloud made up of countless tiny robots—capable of gobbling up enemy units and rearranging their matter into new Nano-Swarm Hosts. "It's the ultimate test of your strategic prowess," Kim insisted. "This time, the meta will be given all the time it needs to work things out, I promise you.”
Reactions from the StarCraft community have ranged from uproarious laughter to resigned groans. "Is he trolling us?" asked seasoned gamer and noted critic of free units, beastyqt. "Free units that generate even more free units? Really?”
Many are already calling the Nano-Swarm Host "the pinnacle of trolling," while others believe it could be a brilliant stroke of marketing genius. "He's certainly succeeded in sparking conversation about the game," observed esteemed caster and veteran player Artosis. "Whether it's in anticipation or dread, people are curious to see how this plays out."
As the reveal date approaches, one thing is certain: David Kim has once again managed to capture the community's attention. Whether the Nano-Swarm Host will be a redemption arc or another chapter in the saga of frustration remains to be seen. But for now, players are gearing up to face their old nemesis in a new metallic form, ready to settle the score once and for all.
Satire, obviously! Also much of it is GPT generated

Hi there! I currently have a Thermaltake Level 20 VT as a case for my PC. I am also listing the rest of components needed for finding a case:

• MSI MAG B550M (Micro ATX)
• Corsair Hydro H100x (Top, I can't remember if I installed it as intake or outtake)
• Nvidia GeForce 3080ti FE
• Corsair RM850 850W 80 Gold Plus
• 140mm Corsair Fan (x3, two bottom intakes - one rear outtake)
• 2.5" SSD

Rest of components for those curious:

• AMD Ryzen 9 5950x 3.4 GHz
• Kingston HyperX Fury Black DDR4 3600MHz PC4-28800 64GB 4x16GB CL18
• x2 SSD NVME 500GB

I want to replace the case for this reasons:

1. The lights of the components upsets me. I can only deactivate the GPU ones but by launching their own software and I refuse to launch any software to keep something off. That should be the default for gods sake.
2. All of the sides are glass. At first glance this looked like attractive but its actually a magnet of dust and fingerprints, and its hard to clean without leaving scratches. The build came not pretty (I was not looking after it either) so there is no point of having a 360º view of a pile of shitty cable managment a weirdo-placed components, because in this case the motherboard is lying horizontally, parallel to the desk.
3. Is unneccesarily big. I think it was designed for custom builds like having two separate radiators for CPU and GPU, custom liquid cooling... Looks like half empty. If I could fill it with water I would use it as an aquarium.

What I want:

1. Reuse all components OFC, but I can sacrifice the fans (140mm to 120mm) if needed.
2. No glass in any side. Just neccesary vents.
3. Cheap mate metal panels that looks like black powdered painted (You know, that old stuff...) No shiny Piano black panels or whatever. I want to be able to clean the case with sandpaper without damaging it (Just kidding, but you got it)
4. Small as possible. I'm not planning on upgrading this PC in the future. By the time this PC became outdated for my use case, I won't be needing PC's at all anymore.
5. IMPORTANT: The only limitant factor in terms of size is the height, can not exceed 450 MM.

What do you have in mind? I am also in the search! But you master-racer nerdys made all of the manufacturers populate the market with showcases with more lights than Las Vegas. Fck you nerdys. Thanks in advance!
FUN FACT: All of the components that are still manufactured today (I built this like three years ago) have halved its price, except for the case, whose price has doubled. lmao.

Trial Day 11
Katherine Jackson, Rebbie and Trent are at court.
Choreographer Travis Payne & Katherine Jackson spoke briefly in the courtroom before the jury came in. They seemed cordial
Travis Payne Testimony
AEG direct
Payne is wearing a black jacket with a gold emblem on the shoulders with the word "MJ" & a pair of wings
Payne said he was concerned about MJ missing rehearsals. He didn't know why he wasn't showing up, but MJ was also working on an album and a book
Payne said he did not think that Jackson had a problem abusing prescription medications. He acknowledged that Jackson missed rehearsals and he saw the singer shivering or appearing cold in some of his final rehearsals
He worked with Jackson beginning in the 1990's and testified that he never saw Jackson drink alcohol or take any medications. Michael also never discussed his medical treatments, Payne said
Payne told the jury he advised MJ he was looking thin.

"Michael said he was 'getting down to my fighting weight', which I took to mean that he was preparing for the performances", Payne testified. "I had no reason to doubt him"

Payne says he was satisfied with the response.
Payne said there was one day (6/19) when MJ was cold. He thought the frustration had him on edge. When Jackson needed to be layered in blankets and required a heater to be comfortable, Payne said, he believed Michael was merely fighting a cold.

"No one else was cold. He had flu-like symptoms"
"Sometimes he was tired and lethargic and had to be, not convinced, but supported throughout rehearsals," Payne recalled

Payne said that in April, May & June, MJ missed 5 rehearsals with the whole group. He said one time Ortega sent Michael home
Bina shows an email from Ortega to Gongaware on Jun 14:

"Were you aware that Michael's doctor didn't permit him to attend rehearsal yesterday? Without invading his privacy, it might be a good idea to talk to his doctor to make sure everything he requires is in place. Who is responsible for Michael getting proper nourishment/vitamins/therapy every day? Personally, I feel he should have a top Nutritionist and Physical Therapist working with him on a regular basis. The demand on this guy is mentally and physically extraordinary! The show requirements exhaust our 20 year olds. Please don't underestimate the need to stay on top of this"

Another part of the same email chain, from Gongaware:

"Frank and I have discussed it already and have requested a face-to-face meeting w/ the doctor... We want to remind him that it's AEG not Michael Jackson who's paying his salary We want him to understand what is expected of him. He has been dodging Frank so far

Payne said his understanding was that AEG was paying Dr. Murray's salary not Michael. The doctor was there to oversee many things, Payne said. Payne explained he didn't have much reason to question Dr. Murray since he thought that a doctor selected to work with Michael was top notch.
Bina asked Payne whether he ever met Conrad Murray. The choreographer says he met Murray twice. Payne says the first time he met Dr. Murray was at the Carolwood house.

"I was going up the steps, Dr. Murray going downstairs, Michael introduced us."

Payne was coming up from the basement to the middle floor. Studio was at the basement. Payne said he never went to the top floor of the house. He says the second time was at the Staples Center, after a rehearsal and Jackson was leaving for the day. Both meetings were brief.
When asked how Michael performed on June 23 & 24:

"He was having his process, I didn't expect him to be like he would in front of a crowd," Payne explained. "He was not at show standards ... I didn't expect him to be as he would be in front of a crowd."
Payne: "It ebbed and flowed. Some days were good, some days were not as good."

The last two days were good.

"I thought he was in his way to the goals he set himself," Payne told the jury.

He didn't have any question that MJ would be able to perform , adding that he and others were impressed while watching Jackson rehearse at Staples Center on June 23/24, 2009.
Payne described the day MJ died: He was headed to rehearsal at Michael's home, got a call from his mother who said she saw reports on the news. Payne heard news on the radio, called Staples Center spoke to Stacy Walker, she said they were rehearsing. He was told to go to Staples.

"We were optimistic of his arrival," Payne said explaining they were expecting Michael to rehearse at the Staples Center.

Payne said Ortega got a series of calls. He remembers Kenny saying:

'tell me something that will make me know it's you and that this is true'

​

" I remember him (Kenny Ortega) collapsing in his seat and crying," Payne testified

Payne said he never saw Michael drink alcohol or take medication but

"Sometimes, in rehearsal, Michael would appear just a little loopy, under the influence of something, but mostly when he would come to the rehearsals from the dermatologist," Payne testified.

That happened two to four times in the weeks before his death, he said. Payne told that he didn't think Jackson had a problem with prescription drugs

"Michael was undergoing personal cosmetic procedures, so he could feel great and do a good job," Payne said.

Payne also said he appeared groggy in the morning sometimes, which he attributed to lack of sleep

"Mr. Jackson just explained to me that he had trouble sleeping, that he was tired, and that satisfied me," Payne testified.

He stated that he's not sure how much weight MJ had lost
Payne mentioned one day in particular at a meeting with Andre Crouch and singers, MJ seemed a little out of it
Payne said at one point, he & others tried to bring in a top physical therapist who works with Olympic athletes to help Michael. Jackson didn't work w/physical therapist flown in for him.

"At the last minute we realized that Michael was not going to go through with it. He was just not comfortable with the invasion of personal space."

Bina played a clip of This Is It from Jun 4 showing the green screen and making of "Drill" and Michael talking about the cool moves, dancing. Payne said the idea was to show the rehearsals and how things came together. The footage itself wasn't altered, but there was editing. Payne said they picked the best of the rehearsal to include in the documentary. He wanted to reshoot some scenes but was not allowed. Payne, who was an associate producer on the This Is It documentary, said the footage of Jackson had not been retouched or altered.
Jackson cross
Attorney Brian Panish cross examined Payne. He asked if Michael ever performed the entire show from beginning to end. Payne said "No"

"Was he ready to perform for an audience?", Panish asked.
"I thought he was on his way to the goals he had set for himself," Payne answered. "All I saw was improvement and getting closer to the goals"

Payne's impression was that MJ loved being a father. He said he saw the beauty of their relationships, loyalty to one another.

"When we rehearsed, we had meals together," Payne recalled, talking about Michael and all three children.

Payne thought the relationship between MJ and Prince was awesome, Michael was a proud father, great to see how they interacted. Prince wanted to be a director, Michael would point out things to him during rehearsal should that be his career, Payne remembered.
As to Paris Jackson, Payne said he saw a very protective young lady, smart, astute, with knowledge of the production, very hands on. Paris, who was 11 at the time, was

"a very retentive young lady who was very, very smart, very astute," Payne testified. "She had full knowledge of the day-to-day operations, from the time of lunch and what it was going to be, she was hands on -- far beyond her age," he said. "She had a lot of responsibility, which I think she welcomed"

Payne said she was "the female of the house," and also "a daddy's girl."

"She really loved her father," he said. "At that time, she was coming to find out his global successes and presence, so she would wear her Michael Jackson t-shirt, headband and bag," he said.

It was Paris who would bless the food when they were have lunch with their father at home, he said.

"She was always the most vocal of the three children and was very concerned about many of the details of the house, was the temperature correct, what do you want to eat," Payne testified. "She just handled a lot for her young age"

Blanket, who was 7 when his father died, was the most quiet of the three. He liked to watch his father rehearsing his dances with Payne in the basement studio of their home, Payne said.

"He was quiet, but always right there with his dad," he said.

Michael guided and mentored him. Payne said he would be proud if MJ was his father and agreed the children suffered a tremendous loss. When rehearsing with Jackson at his Holmby Hills residence, Payne said the singer clearly delighted in being a father and shared meals with all three

"I saw the beauty of their relationships. I saw their loyalty to their father, I saw his loyalty to them. Their father enlightened them and taught them", he testified. "I was very proud to see Michael as such a loving father."
Panish: "Was Paris a Daddy's girl?"
Payne: "Yes, I believe so"

His description of the close relationship Paris (15) and Prince (16) had with their father four years ago could foreshadow the significance of the children's testimony later in the trial.
Payne always carries a video camera with him and shot videos of rehearsal. AEG took the footage that Payne shot and never returned to him. Email from Randy to Paul:

"Make sure you take out the shots of Michael in that red jacket... He looks way too thin and skeletal."

Payne said he was not aware of the email. He said Michael looked thin, but not skeletal. He doesn't know if Paul/Randy took any the footage out. The email was not displayed for the jury
As for Michael's relationship with Katherine, Payne said

"there's no secret that he loved his mother very much. It is kind of common knowledge"

​

"Karen Faye is a make up artist. She designed the make up, was always there when Michael was there", Payne testified.

Payne said Faye and MJ had a long term working relationship. They spent a lot of personal time together. Faye was concerned and frustrated with how Michael looked. She went to Payne kind of in an aggressive way. Payne told her to report to Ortega.
Payne said he wanted MJ to have a physical therapist, nutritionist, massage therapist, and have his family around. He said this was a different scenario.

"This was the first time MJ was working with AEG," Payne testified, saying he had always been hired by MJJ production before.

Payne said this was the first time Michael was not the sole producer of the show. Payne started working without a signed contract. He was being paid by AEG. Panish showed Payne's written contract. It is between Payne and AEG, beginning April 1, 2009. The contract said only AEG could cancel it. He testified that there was a delay in his contract with AEG because the salary was not in line with his standard charges, but that things worked out after he had a conversation with Jackson. Payne also said he believed AEG was paying Murray's salary, not Jackson
Payne was hired and paid by AEG. His contract was with AEG.

Panish: "Who could fire you. AEG?"
Payne: "I'm sure"

Things became heated when Panish inquired about a text message Karen Faye sent to Payne that accused him of lying to the media after Michael's death. He said earlier Faye had approached him in an "aggressive" way about her concern for Jackson's health but he told her to take her concerns to Ortega.

"I do not remember receiving a text message from Karen Faye asking why I was lying to the media," Payne explained.
Panish: "Were you upset when MJ died?"
Payne: "Yes"

During cross-examination, Payne was shown several photos of premieres for the This Is It documentary .Panish shows a picture of Payne at the red carpet premiere. He agreed he was happy about the premiere. In one, Ortega & AEG executive Randy Phillips flank Jackson's manager, Frank DiLeo, who has a cigar hanging out of his mouth. All three are grinning. Brian Panish, the attorney for Jackson's family, remarked that everyone looked pretty happy
Payne said he wasn't privy to details of what was expected of Dr. Murray. AEG was producepromoter, but MJ was the star, had to be happy
Panish reminded Payne that he had testified in his deposition that AEG was

"trying to protect its investment"

​

"I don't have a dog in this race so I'm not on either side", an aggravated Payne countered adding that he felt Panish was being aggressive. "I'm just saying I don't want to be painted as somebody who's trying to mask anything".

After several hours of testy exchanges with Panish, his voice quivered and he dabbed his eyes with a tissue.

"I'm just trying to have a conversation with you and tell the truth."

Panish asked Payne if defendants' attorney approached him during lunch to show him some documents. He said yes, he saw parts of his deposition
Under cross examination, Payne acknowledged that some of Jackson's behavior, including grogginess, lethargy, insomnia and occasional paranoia, were possible symptoms of prescription drug abuse. He also said that despite testifying earlier that he worked with Jackson one-on-one five days a week, he couldn't recall how many rehearsals the singer actually attended
Panish after lunch break got Travis Payne to concede Jackson wasn't present for a May 19, 2009 rehearsal. Payne also conceded that Jackson was a no-show for a June 22, 2009 rehearsal. Panish confronted Payne saying that yesterday he said he was with MJ at a dance studio on May 19, that they were up on their feet & danced.

Panish: "Sir, Michael was not with you May 19, 2009, was he?"
Payne: "No"
Panish: "He was at the doctor"
Payne: "If you're saying, I'm not disputing"

Panish said that on May 19, Michael was having a cyst removed at Dr. Klein's office, so he could not have been rehearsing with Payne.
Panish then said on Jun 22 MJ wasn't there either, "was he?"
Payne said he didn't know.
Panish said MJ was at another doctor's office
Payne said he may have made a mistake about Jackson's whereabouts & he didn't know his personal schedule. Travis Payne had testified yesterday that he and Jackson ran through certain songs on May 19th. He said today he was testifying based on the schedule and notes he compiled and that his recollection might be wrong

"We're human, sometimes we make mistakes," Payne explained, saying he's not disputing that Michael was or wasn't there on those dates.

Payne said there was always something for Michael to do.

"He needed to come to rehearsal, it was part of the job"

Payne said Michael had a hard time picking up some of the material. He was having trouble learning dances, Payne says. Email from Ortega to Gongaware:

"He has been slow at grabbing hold of the work"

Jackson was having trouble learning dances, choreographer Travis Payne says

"Prior to June, I noticed Mr. Jackson was thinner than I recognized him," Payne said, noting he never saw sudden weight change in MJ.

Second time Payne saw Dr. Murray was the night before Michael died at Staples Center.

"I wanted Michael to go home and go to sleep" Payne recalls. Payne said something about Murray felt off, Payne said. "He didn't feel like an official doctor"

Payne knew MJ had sleeping problems and that Dr. Murray was treating him for that. Ortega also knew; Payne thought Gongaware was aware too. Payne also said he and Ortega knew that Jackson was having sleep problems. Attorney Brian Panish asks if AEG executives knew. There were several objections, and Payne was only allowed to answer "No" as to whether Paul Gongaware knew about Michael's sleep problems
Panish asked Payne about choosing Jackson's dancers for This Is It. Payne says they were whittled down from 5,000 applicants. Applicants submitted video clips and their submissions were used to cull down potential dancers from there. Payne said they received 5,000 applications for dancers, about 2,500 showed up for the audition.He taught them some dance moves, and the pool was further narrowed down. Michael chose the dancers
Panish then asked Payne whether he knew how many doctors AEG interviewed to work with Jackson on This Is It. "No", Payne says. Payne also says he isn't aware how much interviewing or investigation into Murray that AEG did.(Panish's point appears to be that there was more scrutiny of backup dancers than Conrad Murray)
During preparations for This Is It, Michael at times seemed "under the influence of something" and once couldn't take the stage because he appeared incoherent, Payne testified.
Payne said he was aware that Jackson had problems sleeping and chalked up the singer's sometimes erratic behavior to sleep aids or sedatives from his dermatologist visits.

"You have to understand that one always says hindsight is 20/20. In the moment I had no inkling of what, ultimately, what was revealed until Mr. Jackson's passing", he said

Payne saw Michael tired and fatigued. He agreed that those symptoms could be signs of drug addiction. Payne was aware that MJ was losing weight during rehearsals and he had not seeing him lose weight like that before.

"He was not in great physical shape and was sore,working up his stamina. Lack of sleep and proper nourishment were starting to show", Payne said.

Payne says at one point, he told Kenny Ortega that Jackson appeared "assisted" (meaning that he thought he was on drugs\meds)
Payne said some people were concerned about the goals not being met, including Randy Phillips and Paul Gongaware. Payne learned what Demerol was after MJ died. He also remembers a mention of Demerol in the song "Morphine".
Panish asked if MJ knew the lyrics of his songs.

"I think he did, he knew most of them, but he wanted to have a Teleprompter for safety.He didn't want to make any mistakes, to refresh his memory. Also to use for sequence of songs",Payne said.

Payne agreed that it was very unusual for Michael to have a Teleprompter with the lyrics of his own songs. He never used it before. Payne didn't specify which songs Jackson wanted the teleprompter for
Payne said a body double was requested for Michael. Misha Gabriel was his body double, but shorter than him. Some of the scenes in the documentary are with the body double, Payne testified. Payne remembers at the Culver Studios in Smooth Criminal there was a stunt and Misha was asked to jump through a glass plate
Payne said most the time, MJ was present at rehearsals. "It wasn't a big deal," he expressed
Panish showed an email from the band leader Michael Bearden:

"Michael is not in shape enough yet to sing this stuff live and dance at the same time. He can use the ballads to sing live and get his stamina back up, Once he's healthy enough and has more strength I Have full confidence he can sing the majority of the show live. His voice sounds amazing right now, he needs to build it back up. I still need all big dance numbers to be in the system so we can concentrate on choreography."

Payne was aware that AEG was considering in mid June pulling the plug on the show. He said Michael looked exhausted & paranoid on Jun 19. Jackson's condition and missed rehearsals led to talk within the last 10 days of Jackson's life that AEG Live LLC, which was promoting "This Is It," might cancel the concert series.

"It was 'We've got to get this together or the plug may be pulled,'" Payne says

Payne was working for AEG and said he relayed his concerns about Jackson's possible prescription drug use and that he was exhibiting troubling signs of insomnia, weight loss and paranoia in his final days to tour director Kenny Ortega. Jackson was struggling to get into shape for the shows, and Payne said his voice coach suggested using a voice track for fast-paced songs until the singer's stamina improved.
Payne went to Michael's house on June 20. He was cold and had to light the fireplace and rub his hand and feet to warm himself up
Panish showed a picture of Michael on June 24 rehearsing "Thriller"; Payne said MJ improved but was not at his best yet.

Panish: "Around June 20, was Ortega in the mindset that Michael Jackson was not ready for this?" Payne: "Yes"

Payne said Michael was not ready, it was not the Michael he knew. He died four days later. But he didn't see anything that alarmed him on June 23/24

Panish:" Did you see that Michael was getting pressured to get everything done in the last days?" Payne: "Yes"

Payne said he could sense something was wrong, but didn't know what it was. He said Jackson's performances in the final days of his life were impressive, and it felt

"like we were definitely on an upswing"

​

"I never doubted Michael because he was the architect of this and he wanted to do it, so part of my responsibility was to help him get there", Payne said, his voice racked with emotion.

Panish ended his direct examination of choreographer Travis Payne with three questions.

Panish: "Did you see that Michael Jackson appeared to be pressured to get everything done at the Staples last rehearsals?"
"Yes," Payne said
Panish: "The pressure about the shows started to manifest itself physically in Michael Jackson?"
"Yes," Payne replied.
Panish:" You could sense that something was wrong, you just didn't know what it was?"
Payne responded "Yes."

AEG re-direct
Payne's demeanor changed after Panish finished questioning him. He was holding back tears when the AEG attorney started re-direct examination. For the next several moments, Payne blinked and dabbed both eyes with a tissue. It was the first time he'd gotten emotional on the stand.

Bina in re-direct asked: "Do you think you could get him there?"
Payne: "Absolutely!"

Bina asked Payne again about how many rehearsals Jackson attended. Payne said MJ was present a significant amount of the days he was scheduled to work but he couldn't recall dates, precisely how many that Jackson attended.
As to Gongaware's email regarding what was expected of Dr. Murray, Payne said the inconsistencies with Michael missing rehearsals warrant a talk. Payne said he thought Dr. Murray was there to care for his patient, making sure right nutritionist was there, to get him ready for the show. Payne never discussed with MJ about his doctors or personal affairs. Payne and Faye were professionals with each other, but not friends.

"Production felt he wasn't coming to rehearsals enough, and that was frustrating to some of the staff," Payne testified. "I had a concern we needed to create a show Michael would enjoy doing it," Payne explained

She also showed Payne photos from the This Is It premiere. First photo is of Payne shaking Jermaine Jackson's hand at the movie premiere. Bina also showed another image of smiling Jermaine, Tito, Jackie and Marlon with Payne at the premiere. Payne cried saying he had been through so much and the rough part was behind them. He was pleased to show the fans what the show was to be.
Jackson re-cross
In re-cross, Panish notes that none of Michael's brothers are part of this lawsuit.
Panish then asked Payne whether Katherine Jackson and Michael's kids went to the premiere. Panish says Katherine Jackson & her grandchildren didn't go to the premiere because they weren't over Jackson's death. Payne said he didn't think anyone was over Jackson's death when the film premiered in late 2009.
Court Transcript

Alright, buckle up because we're diving into why Vancouver's food scene is straight-up legendary. Forget the regular city vibes; Vancouver is a melting pot of flavors, a culinary carnival that beats anything else in North America. Join me on this personal quest to unravel why the combo of Asian influence, Pacific Northwest goodness, and chill dining vibes makes Vancouver the top pick for foodies.
Asian Culinary Delights: Tradition and Creativity Unleashed
Vancouver's streets resonate with the aromas of traditional Asian dishes, prepared with a touch of authenticity that transports you across borders. Picture slurping savory ramen in Chinatown or savoring hand-pulled noodles in a cozy corner of East Van. But what makes Vancouver's Asian food scene truly exceptional is its fusion of tradition with modern creativity.
In this city, innovation meets tradition on a plate. Take, for instance, squid ink brioche with sea urchin pâté – a daring yet harmonious blend of flavors that pushes the boundaries of culinary expectations. Vancouver's chefs are culinary artists, creating dishes that not only pay homage to traditional recipes but also elevate them into extraordinary, palate-pleasing experiences.
And let's not forget the matcha mochi croissants that have taken the city by storm. A fusion of Japanese mochi and French croissants, these delectable pastries are a testament to Vancouver's culinary diversity. Each bite is a dance of textures and tastes, showcasing the city's flair for seamlessly blending cultures and cuisines.
Pacific Northwest's Grocery List: Seafood Galore and More
Living next to the Pacific Ocean is like having a seafood aisle in your backyard. Fresh salmon, sweet Dungeness crab, and chubby spot prawns – Vancouver's seafood game is on point. And let's not forget the local veggies and meats, straight from the region's green landscapes. It's like nature’s way of saying, "Hey, enjoy the good stuff!"
Nature Vibes: Dining with a View
Vancouver's layout is like a dating app for food and nature; they're a match made in heaven. Whether you're brunching in a leafy neighborhood or devouring seafood with an ocean panorama, the city serves up an Instagrammable backdrop for every meal. Picture this: a patio, a breeze, and the scent of fir trees – eating out just got a whole lot cooler.
Neighborhood Chronicles: Culinary Adventures Off the Beaten Path
Downtown is cool, but venture out, and you'll hit foodie gold. Commercial Drive's eclectic spots or Richmond's legit Asian flavors – Vancouver's neighborhoods are like culinary treasure maps. Each area has its own flavor story, tempting you to be the food explorer you were born to be.
Conclusion
Vancouver isn't just a city with good food; it's a food fiesta waiting to happen. The Asian vibes, the Pacific Northwest's goodies, and the city's chill connection with nature make dining here a full-blown experience. Vancouver isn't just North America's food champion; it's a vibe, a journey through flavors, and a big, fat stamp on your foodie passport. So, next time you're craving a culinary adventure, Vancouver's got your back, fork, and knife.
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