This is the list that I wrote for Oklahoma's execution roster since the nationwide reinstatement of capital punishment in the late 1970s. Something that should be mentioned is that given the nature of many death penalty related crimes, many of the descriptions contain very disturbing details. Please read at your own risk.
Florida's list is next, and I'll post my list for Texas once I've completed it. With Texas, I've currently finished 464 entries out of the 587 cases to date. That will probably take 7 or 8 posts for it all to be released, so I'll probably do two posts a day with Texas to avoid spamming the sub. At the end of this year, I'll repost the states that have conducted further executions with the updated information.
As with Missouri and Virginia, Reddit's maximum character count limitations forced me to divide Oklahoma's list into two separate parts. Here is the link to part 2.
The currently 124 executed offenders, cases 1 to 62:
1. Charles Coleman (~1950s-1990, lethal injection): A month after he was released on parole in 1979, Coleman broke into a house. While sacking it for any valuables, the homeowner’s brother and sister in law, 68 year old John and 62 year old Roxie Seward, walked in on him and were both shot dead. Coleman stole Roxie’s purse, several packets of frozen meat, and the homeowner’s watch during the burglary, and was arrested shortly afterwards. However, Coleman managed to escape custody, and went on a rampage that involved several burglaries, auto thefts, slitting the throat of a policeman in a failed murder attempt, the shooting death of 49 year old Russell Lewis Jr. in a carjacking, and the abduction of a deputy. The kidnapped deputy was rescued following an armed standoff with other police officers. Coleman had an extensive history of animal cruelty, armed robberies, assaults, and carrying concealed weapons convictions dating back to when he was 11 years old. He was also heavily suspected in the murder of his teenage girlfriend’s father, but was acquitted by the courts despite the prosecution’s strong belief in his guilt.
2. Robyn Parks (1977-1992, lethal injection): During a gas station robbery, Parks shot and killed Abdullah Ibrahim, a 24 year old Bangladeshi immigrant that worked as the attendant. According to Parks, he murdered Ibrahim for catching him using a stolen credit card.
3. Olan Randle (1980-1992, lethal injection): Randle invaded a home and shot the occupants, 41 year old Robert Swinford, Sinford's fiance 42 year old Averil Bourque, and Bourque's friend 38 year old Julia Lovejoy, dead. He took a pocket knife and several watches from the victims.
4. Thomas Grasso (~1970s(?)-1995, lethal injection): While living in Oklahoma, Grasso strangled 87 year old Hilda Johnson, the best friend of his girlfriend's grandmother, to death with her Christmas lights. He took $8 from her purse, several coins that added up to $4, and a television set that he sold for $125. Grasso then moved to New York, and strangled 81 year old Leslie Holtz for his social security check. The trialing arrangements caused some controversy, as the New York governors at the time were anti death penalty, and tried to prevent Grasso's extradition in favor of giving him a life sentence in their jurisdiction. Grasso had several previous convictions for theft and was fired multiple times for stealing from his jobs.
5. Roger Stafford (~1974(?)-1995, lethal injection): Stafford was condemned for killing at least 9 people in two separate robbery incidents with his brother and ex wife, though his ex wife claimed that he was involved with as many as 34 murders nationwide. The first convicted incident was when he and the ex wife carjacked and fatally shot a couple, 38 year old Melvin and 31 year old Linda Lorenz, and their son, 12 year old Richard. A few weeks after the Lorenz murders, Stafford stormed a restaurant and gunned down 6 employees, 56 year old Isaac Freeman, 43 year old Louis Zacarias, 17 year old Anthony Tew, 17 year old David Lindsey, 16 year old David Salsman, and 15 year old Terri Horst. One of Stafford's additional attributed victims was 20 year old Jimmy Berry, who was killed in the hold up of an Alabaman McDonalds, but he wasn't charged by the state due to his death sentences in Oklahoma.
6. Robert Brecheen (1983-1995, lethal injection): Breechen was involved in a feud over money with 59 year old Mary Stubbs and her husband. In an attempt to take what he perceived was owed to him, Breechen carried out a night time burglary of their home. While rummaging through the house, Breechen stumbled upon old Marie in her living room and shot her to death. The gunshots and screams awoke her husband, and he chased him away with his own gun.
7. Benjamin Brewer (1978-1996, lethal injection): Brewer raped his neighbor, 20 year old Karen Stapleton, in her home and stabbed her to death
8. Steven Hatch (1979-1996, lethal injection): Hatch and another assailant, Glen Ake, forced themselves inside the home that Richard Dougass, a 43 year old reverend, shared with his wife, 36 year old Marilyn, and their two children, 16 year old Brooks and 12 year old Lesile. The pair tied up the family and raped Lesile in front of her parents and brother. All four family members were shot, and Hatch and Ake ran off with $43 and the parents’ wedding rings. Richard and Marilyn were both killed in the shootings, while their children survived the attack. Ake was also initially condemned for the attack, but his sentence was overturned and resentenced to life following mental health concerns, and passed away from undisclosed natural causes in 2011.
9. Scott Carpenter (1994-1997, lethal injection): In a convenience store robbery, Carpenter stabbed the owner, 56 year old A. J. Kelley, in the neck, and hid the body in the minnow room. He filled his truck with $37 worth of gas from the pumps and drove away from the scene. His execution caused some controversy, as it was reported that Carpenter gasped and spasmed for 11 minutes after being injected.
10. Michael Long (1997-1998, lethal injection): Enraged that his coworker, 24 year old Sheryl Graber, refused him sex and started screaming for help, he stabbed her over 31 times. Long also shot and killed her son, 5 year old Andrew, for being a witness.
11. Stephen Wood (1992-1998, lethal injection): While heavily intoxicated, Wood stabbed two other homeless men, 46 year old Charles Stephen and 34 year old Charles Von Johnson, dozens of times each. He was given a life sentence for both of their murders. During his incarceration, Robert Brigden, a 59 year old former minister that was serving a 40 year sentence for molesting several girls between the ages of 4-14 in his congregation, moved into his unit after refusing to go into protective custody. Woods killed Brigden in a stabbing attack, and his sentence was escalated to death by the courts for it.
12. Tuan Anh Nguyen (~1982-1998, lethal injection): By all accounts, Nguyen was jealously possessive over his wife, 21 year old Donna. During one of their arguments over his behavior, he stabbed Donna, her 6 year old nephew Joseph White, and her 3 year old niece Amanda White, in their home and left the bodies to be found by the children’s parents. He fled to Arizona, groomed a 14 year old girl into an illicit “relationship”, and impregnated her. After he convinced her to move in with him, Nguyen physically and sexually abused the girl until she fled and went to the local police for help. Nguyen was then deported back to Oklahoma to face trial for Donna and the White children’s slayings, and was sentenced to death for them.
13. John Duvall (1986-1998, lethal injection): During a fight with his wife, 30 year old Donna, Duvall stabbed and suffocated her to death with a pillow.
14. John Castro Sr. (1983-1999, lethal injection): Castro carjacked Beulah Cox, a 31 year old Oklahoma State University student, after she picked him up hitchhiking and shot her to death. A few months later, Castro held up a restaurant with an empty pistol, and attacked the manger, 29 year old Rhonda Pappan, after forcing her to open the register. During their struggle, Pappan was fatally stabbed, and he took off with her purse. During his mid teens, Castro was allegedly molested by his mother. Castro's attorneys made the argument that his glimpses of Cox's buttocks reminded him of his mother's reported abuse, and he was triggered into attacking her for it.
15. Sean Sellers (1985-1999, lethal injection): In 1985, a then 15 year old Sellers tried to buy beer from a convenience store, but the clerk, 32 year old Robert Bower, denied him due to being underaged at the time. Sellers gunned him down in a fit of rage. A year later, Sellers shot and killed his mother, 32 year old Vonda Bellofatto, and stepfather, 43 year old Paul, in their sleep. Due to being 16 at the time of his conviction, Sellers remains the youngest condemned offender to have his sentence carried out in the post Furman era. He also attracted national media attention for claiming that his crimes were the result of demonic possession.
16. Scotty Moore (1983-1999, lethal injection): Moore was fired from a motel for undisclosed reasons. In retaliation, Moore and a cousin (whom he was dating at the time), assaulted the motel, and gunned down the desk clerk, 42 year old Alex Fernandez. According to court documents, the pair took a total of $97 in the robbery.
17. Norman Newsted (1984-1999, lethal injection): Newsted tricked Lawrence Buckley, a 26 year old cab driver, into picking him up. He shot Buckley dead and took his wallet. In an attempt to cover his tracks, Newsted placed the body inside the cab, and drove it into a creek near a local church. Despite his best efforts, Buckley’s cab and remains were discovered a day later by the church’s pastor.
18. Cornel Cooks (1982-1999, lethal injection): Cooks and his accomplice broke into the home of 87 year old Jennie Ridling. She was gagged, raped, and suffocated to death with gauze wrappings. According to autopsy reports, the pair abused her for over 2 hours. They then sacked the house for any valuables and left with her checkbook.
19. Bobby Ross (1983-1999, lethal injection): While robbing an inn, Ross fatally shot a police officer, 30 year old Steve Mahan, that tried to intervene.
20. Malcolm Johnson (~1970s(?)-2000, lethal injection): Johnson invaded the apartment of 76 year old Ura Thompson and sexually assaulted her. Thompson either died from having her chest compounded during the abuse or was suffocated by Johnson’s hands covering her nose. He seized several possessions such as furs, typewriters, purse, watch, rings, and a hand mirror, which were discovered by police in his residence during an unrelated investigation of a firearms possession charge. Johnson had an extensive criminal history, which included several convictions of rape, armed robberies, and burglaries. The case attracted controversy when it was discovered that the lead chemist in the investigation misconducted several of her other cases, and forged some of the evidence used in the trial. Despite the other overwhelming evidence to the contrary, Johnson’s supporters took the opportunity to push a narrative of his innocence.
21. Gary Walker (~1960s-2000, lethal injection): Walker abducted, raped, and murdered at least 5 women, 36 year old Margaret Lydick, 35 year old Jane Hilburn, 32 year old Janet Jewell, 25 year old Valerie Shaw-Hartzell, and 24 year old DeRonda Roy, and non fatally assaulted several other women and teenage girls. The victims were mostly strangled to death with their bras and panties. Some of them were forced to withdraw hundreds of dollars from ATMs before they were killed. He also strangled a man, 63 year old Eddie Cash, with an electrical cord while robbing his home. Walker had dozens of previous convictions for burglary, carjacking, drug possession, and carrying concealed weapons. Some of his earliest arrests occurred when he was a teenager.
22. Michael Roberts (~1988-2000, lethal injection): A career burglar, Roberts was condemned for murder of 80 year old Lula Brooks. She was raped and her throat was slit by an intruder in her home. Roberts' death sentence and execution has been contested, as he was convicted on his later recounted testimony alone. He claimed that the investigators tricked him into confessing with the promise of a plea deal that was allegedly withheld from him.
23. Kelly Rogers (1990-2000, lethal injection): Rogers’ girlfriend lured 21 year old Karen Lauffenburger into her apartment with a fake pizza order. They accosted her when she arrived with the delivery. After the couple forced Lauffenburger to hand to over the $40 she earned from the night's pizza deliveries and withdraw $175 from an ATM, Rogers raped and stabbed her to death. The body was left in Lauffenburger’s apartment and was found by her boyfriend.
24. Ronald Boyd (1986-2000, lethal injection): During a robbery spree of several gas stations and supermarkets, Boyd engaged in a shootout with the responding officers. A Master Patrolman, 32 year old Richard Riggs, was killed in the exchange.
25. Charles Foster (~1980s(?)-2000, lethal injection): Foster suspected a grocery store owner, 74 year old Claude Wiley, of making sexual advances at his wife. He arranged for her to entice Wiley to their home with an order. When he arrived with the delivery, Foster stabbed and bludgeoned him to death with a baseball bat. He a history of convictions involving threats and violence, though my sources didn’t disclose any specific details.
26. James Robedeaux (1978-2000, lethal injection): In 1978, Robedeaux strangled his first wife, 30 year old Linda, and plead guilty to a second degree murder charges. He was released after serving 6 out of a 25 year sentence despite an escape attempt. In the following year, he began a relationship with 37 year old Nancy McKinney while he married a different woman. During an argument, Robedeaux beat McKinney to death, dismembered her body with a saw and machete, and scattered the remains across the state. While being investigated for McKinney's murder, he was arrested for choking and beating his estranged second wife. The cases were incidental and kept separate by the courts.
27. Roger Berget (~1985-2000, lethal injection): Berget carjacked and abducted 33 year old Rick Patterson with an accomplice, and shot him dead. He also admitted to the beating death of a roommate, 40 year old James Meadows, on the behalf of the man's wife. As a trivial side note, Berget's brother Rodney was executed in 2018 by the state of South Dakota for killing a prison guard [for more information, please see Rodney Berget's entry under the South Dakota section of my states with less then 10 executions post].
28. William Bryson (1988-2000, lethal injection): To collect a $300,000 life insurance policy, Marilyn Plantz recruited her boyfriend Byrson and his friend to kill her husband, 33 year old James. Byrson and his friend ambushed Plantz in his house as he was coming home from work and beat him to death with a baseball bat. With the intentions of staging an accident, Marilyn ordered the pair to burn the body in the couple's pickup truck.
29. Gregg Braun (1989-2000, lethal injection): Across several states, Braun shot and killed 4 women, 48 year old Geraldine Valdez, 31 year old Gwendolyn Miller, 28 year old Mary Rains, 27 year old Barbara Kochendorfer, and one man, 54 year old Pete Spurrier, while robbing stores.
30. George Wallace (~1970s-2000, lethal injection): Known as "the Mad Paddler" due to his habit of spanking abducted preteen and teenage boys with a wooden paddle, Wallace kidnapped his victims by posing as a police officer. After duping his targets into thinking that they were being arrested, Wallace restrained them with handcuffs and leg chains. The captives were then sexually abused and shot or stabbed to death. His crimes were exposed when an 18 year old man he abducted escaped from him despite being shot and stabbed numerous times. By his own admission, Wallace murdered 18 year old Thomas Reed, 15 year old William Domer, 14 year old Mark McLaughlin, 14 year old Jeffrey Foster, and 12 year old Alonzo Cade.
31. Eddie Trice (1987-2001, lethal injection): Trice snuck into the home of 84 year old Ernestine Jones and raped her. After he beat Jones to death with numbchucks, he terrorized and extorted her cognitively disabled son of $500 with threats of killing him if he told anyone of the murder. The son was also assaulted with a hammer, and he received injuries to his right eye, right cheekbone, and his right forearm.
32. Wanda Allen (~1981-2001, lethal injection): In 1981, Allen got into a fight with her live in girlfriend, 21 year old Dedra Pettus, and shot her dead. Despite giving a bungled story about her being accidentally killed in a shootout with Pettus’ ex boyfriend to the investigators, Allen managed to secure a 4 year sentence for manslaughter after pleading guilty to a plea deal, and was released after serving two years. While incarcerated, she started dating a fellow inmate, 29 year old Gloria Leathers, and continued their relationship outside of prison. The couple’s relationship was marred with extreme domestic violence on Allen’s end. In one incident, Allen struck Leathers with a rake. In 1989, while they were arguing in front of a shopping center, Allen shot and killed Leathers. Leathers herself also had history of violence, and had a conviction for stabbing a woman to death. Allen and her defense team tried to use Leathers’ previous convictions to make a self defense argument, but that was shot down by the courts.
33. Floyd Medlock (1990-2001, lethal injection): 7 year old Katherine Busch went to visit her family's old apartment, which Medlock was residing in, by herself. Busch knocked on the door and Medlock let her inside after she begged for food. He then choked and sexually assaulted the girl, dunked her head in a toilet bowl, and stabbed her to death. The body was hidden in a nearby dumpster. Busch's grandmothers were staunch pro capital punishment and anti death penalty activists respectively, and their public feud over Medlock's sentence and execution attracted some media attention. Medlock also had an extensive criminal history despite being only 19 at the time of Busch's murder, and was previously arrested several times for indecent exposure, arson, armed robbery, and marijuana possession.
34. Dion Smallwood (1992-2001, lethal injection): Smallwood walked into the home of his ex girlfriend's adoptive stepmother, 68 year old Lois Frederick, without invitation. He had a tumultuous and often violent relationship with her adopted stepdaughter that she strongly opposed, and they broke up under her pressure. After an argument, Smallwood knocked Frederick unconscious with a croquet mallet, locked her in a car, and burned her alive in it.
35. Mark Fowler (1985-2001, lethal injection): To get back at his ex employers for firing him, Fowler and his partner, Billy Fox, stormed a supermarket that he used to work out. The pair rounded up 3 employees, Chumpon Chaowasin, a 44 year old Thai immigrant, 33 year old Rick Cast, and 27 year old John Barrier, at gun point. Their hostages were shot, clubbed, and stabbed to death, and they took over $2,7000 in cash and checks.
36. Billy Fox (1985-2001, lethal injection): Fox assisted the above mentioned Mark Fowler in robbing a supermarket and murdering 3 of its employees
37. Loyd Lafevers (1985-2001, lethal injection): Lafevers and his accomplice, Randall Cannon, kidnapped 84 year old Addie Hawley from her home. She was raped, trapped in the trunk of a car, and burned alive in it. Although she was rescued, Hawley died from her injuries 6 hours later. The pair stole Hawley's wedding ring and Lafevers gifted it to a stripper. As Hawley's nephew was a Colorado state senator, her murder gained some attention from media outlets.
38. Dorsie Jones Jr. (1979-2001, lethal injection): While drinking at a bar, a barmaid chastised Jones for carrying an unconcealed gun. He shot at her in a fit of rage, but missed and injured his female companion instead. Jones then turned his attention to the other patrons and fired on them. 48 year old Stanley Buck Sr. was killed in front of his 19 year old son, who was also wounded in the shooting.
39. Robert Clayton (~1980s-2001, lethal injection): Clayton attacked 19 year old Rhonda Timmons while she was sunbathing near her apartment. She was raped, stabbed, kicked in the head, and strangled to death with her swimming suit. Her husband found Timmons' body laying next to their infant daughter, who was left unharmed. Clayton had a previous rape conviction in Tennessee and a robbery conviction in Texas.
40. Ronald Fluke (1997-2001, lethal injection): Out of despair that his gambling addiction drove his family to near poverty, Fluke shot and killed his wife, 44 year old Ginger, and their daughters, 13 year old Kathryn and 11 year old Susanne, while they were sleeping in their bedrooms. He initially attacked Ginger with a hatchet, but turned to shooting when she fought back.
41. Marilyn Plantz (1988-2001, lethal injection): The married girlfriend of William Bryson. As mentioned under Bryson's entry, Plantz arranged for him and his friend to kill her husband James to collect his life insurance policy.
42. Terrance James (1983-2001, lethal injection): While awaiting trial for a theft of government property charge, James and two accomplices strangled a fellow inmate, 25 year old Mark Berry, with wire out of their suspicions of him being a snitch. They then hung the body in an attempt to make it look like a suicide. Berry was another party in the theft of government property case, and James and his accomplices believed that it was his testimony that got them arrested.
43. Vincent Johnson (1991-2001, lethal injection): Johnson gunned down 44 year old Shirley Mooneyham in her home. The prosecution believed that Mooneyham's boyfriend arranged the killing to collect a life insurance policy, but he was acquitted at trial.
44. Jerald Harjo (~1980s-2001, lethal injection): Harjo snuck into the bedroom of 64 year old Ruth Porter, raped her, and suffocated her with a pillowcase. He then snatched Porter's car keys and drove off with her van. His past criminal history was extensive, and was in prison numerous times for burglary and autotheft.
45. Jack Walker (1988-2001, lethal injection): Disgruntled with the custody dispute over their then 3 month old son, Walker stabbed his ex girlfriend, 17 year old Shelly Ellison, and her uncle, 30 year old Donald, 32 and 11 times with an ice pick during a confrontation at their home.
46. Alvie Hale Jr. (1983-2001, lethal injection): Hale kidnapped 24 year old William Perry to extort a $350,000 ransom from his banking family. When the negotiations failed, Perry was shot dead, and Hale buried the body on his father's property.
47. Lois Smith (1982-2001, lethal injection): Smith, her son, and a female accomplice abducted her son's ex girlfriend, 21 year old Cindy Baillee, from an airport out of fear her testifying of his involvement in the drug trade. Baillee was taken to Smith's ex husband's house, and stabbed in the throat by her ex boyfriend while driving to their destination. Inside the home, she was taunted by Smith with a gun, and was shot 7 times in the chest and 2 times in the back of the head. While her son was reloading the gun, Smith jumped on and crushed Bailee's throat.
48. Sahib Lateef Al-Mosawi (1992-2001, lethal injection): Following a dispute over their newborn son's name, Al-Mosawi's estranged wife, 26 year old Inaam Al-Nashi, fled to the apartment of her uncle, 45 year old Mohammed. Al-Mosaw attacked the pair in the apartment and stabbed them to death. Inaam's sister was also stabbed, but she managed to escape with her life. The couple and their families were refugees from Iraq that were displaced by the First Persian Gulf War, and they fled into the United States.
49. John Romano (1985-2002, lethal injection): Romano and his accomplice David Woodruff robbed and murdered two of their acquaintances. One of the victims, 63 year old Lloyd Thompson, was attacked in his apartment. Thompson was held down by the pair while they stabbed him 22 times and served his spinal cord. The other victim, 52 year old Roger Sarfaty, was tied up, beaten, stabbed 5 times, and strangled to death in a jewelry store he owned. In the robberies, Romano and Woodruff stole several pieces of jewelry from Sarfaty, and took most of Thompson’s quarter collection.
50. David Woodruff (1985-2002, lethal injection): As mentioned under John Romano's entry, Woodruff took part in the robbery murders of Lloyd Thompson and Roger Sarfaty.
51. Randall Cannon (1985-2002, lethal injection): Cannon assisted Loyd Lafevers in abducting, sexually assaulting, and burning Addie Hawley alive in her car. Although he was acquitted of molesting Hawley, Cannon was still condemned for his part in the kidnapping and murder.
52. Earl Frederick Sr. (~1989-2002, lethal injection): Frederick beat Bradford Beck, a 41 year old veteran that was crippled during his service in the Vietnam war, to death in his home after befriending him. He ransacked the house and dumped Beck's body in a field. A second murder, the robbery and shooting death of a Texan man, 77 year old Shirley Fox, was also tied to him. However, authorities in Texas withheld from prosecuting Fredrick due to his death penalty trial and conviction in Oklahoma. Both Fox and Beck had physical disabilities, which led prosecutors to the conclusion that Frederick intentionally selected and depredated on disabled men.
53. Jerry McCracken (~1980s(?)-2002, lethal injection): McCracken and his accomplice shot up a bar, killed 3 patrons and the bartender, and made off with $350. The victims that lost their lives were 41 year old Carol McDaniels, 37 year old Timothy Sheets, 34 year old Steven Sheets, and 27 year old Tyrrell Boyd. Months before the mass shooting, McCracken was paroled after serving time for stabbing 3 people in a bar fight.
54. Jay Neill (1984-2002, lethal injection): During a bank robbery, Neill disemboweled and nearly decapitated 3 tellers, 42 year old Kay Bruno, 25 year old Joyce Mullenix, and 19 year old Jerri Bowles. A group of 4 customers, consisting of 33 year old Ralph Zeller, a married couple, and their 14 month old daughter, unwittingly walked in on him, and he herded them into a backroom to be shot. Zeller was killed, the couple were wounded, and Neill left the daughter unharmed due to running out of bullets. Neill's boyfriend was given a life sentence for the robbery and murders, despite not being directly involved.
55. Ernest Carter Jr. (~1989-2002, lethal injection): After being fired from an autoshop, Carter robbed it with an accomplice, and fatally shot a security guard, 35 year old Eugene Manowski. The pair stole the shop's tow truck, and later tried to burn it with Carter's girlfriend to destroy any traces of the crime. Carter was also previously accused of burning a friend to death in the previous year, but the charges were dismissed.
56. Daniel Revilla (1987-2003, lethal injection): While babysitting his girlfriend's son, 13 month old Mark Gomez, in their home, Revilla broke the boy’s ribs in a beating and scalded him with boiling water. When he brought the boy to a hospital, Revilla gave a story that he accidentally hit Gomez’s head with a door handle, which was quickly seen through by the staff. According to the accounts of his girlfriend and her family, Revilla was violently abusive to Gomez, and they recounted incidents of him trapping the boy in a kitchen drawer, dunking him in cold water, folding him into a pull up bed, and hanging him by his ankles with duct tape.
57. Bobby Fields (~1990s-2003, lethal injection): Fields shot and killed 77 year old Louise Schem while burglarizing her home. She had tried to shot him with her .25 calibre pistol, but he wrestled the gun away from her, and gunned her down with it. His intentions was to steal Schem's television set to sell for cocaine, but left empty handed after losing his nerves with the struggle and murder. According to court documents, Fields had a previous robbery and assault conviction, and several arrests for drug possession.
58. Walanzo Robinson (1989-2003, lethal injection): A member of the Gangster Bloods street gang, Robinson shot and killed 26 year old Dennis Hill, an affiliate of a rival gang, in a turf war over drug sales.
59. John Hooker (~1971-2003, lethal injection): As a teenager in 1971, Hooker attended a party at a friend's house, and got into an argument. In a fit of anger, he fatally shot 18 year old Alta Lang, and wounded two other partygoers. Due to the witnesses refusing to cooperate with the investigation and being unable to prove any calculated intentions, Hooker was given a manslaughter conviction, and released a few years later. After he was paroled, Hooker started dating Sylvia Stokes, and fathered several children with her. Their troubled relationship lasted for 8 years, and ended when Stokes filed a protection order against him. In retaliation, Hooker lured Stokes and her mother, 53 year old Durcilla Morgan, into his apartment and stabbed them both to death.
60. Scot Hain (~1980s-2003, lethal injection): Hain carjacked and abducted a couple, 27 year old Michael Houghton and 22 year old Laura Sanders. After taking $565 and some bags of clothing, he forced them into the trunk of their car at gunpoint, and burned them alive in it. He had several previous arrests for robbery, and was involved with a number of rapes and attempted kidnappings months before the Houghton and Sanders' murders.
61. Don Hawkins Jr. (1985-2003, lethal injection): Hawkins kidnapped 29 year old Linda Ann Thompson and her two daughters, aged 4 years old and 18 months old, from a mall. Although his original intentions were to ransom off Thompson and her children, Hawkins gang raped the captive woman with his cousin and his girlfriend's teenage nephew, and drowned her in a lake. Thompson's children were spared and simply left with a babysitter. Hawkins and his accomplice then went on a nation wide rampage with his accomplice that involved the abductions and rapes of several grown women and teenage girls, hanging 31 year old David Coupez of Colorado in his home while robbing him, and countless other robberies.
62. Larry Jackson (~1984-2003, lethal injection): In 1984, Jackson shot and killed his girlfriend, 19 year old Freda Washington. He accepted a plea deal that dumbed down the charges to second degree murder, and was given a 30 year sentence for it. During his incarceration, Jackson started a relationship with 29 year old Wendy Cade. Despite her promises of marriage after his release, Cade left him for another man, and they got engaged. When Jackson was assigned to a prison work crew, he snuck out and went to confront Cade. Reportedly, the two had bought alchool, cocaine, and cigerates together and had sex in Cade's apartment. However, they got into an argument, and he slashed Cade's throat and stabbed her 31 times with box cutters. Jackson then left with her jewelry, watch, and the keys to her jeep.

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We had 9 events with 315 players this quite Mothers Day weekend.
Lists can be found on Bestcoastpairings.com or other sites as listed below. Some events are sponsored and thus can be seen without a paid membership. Everything else requires the membership and you should support BCP if you can.
Please support Meta Monday on Patreon if you can. I put a lot hours into this each Sunday. Thanks for all the support.

See the full Data Table at https://40kmetamonday.wordpress.com/2024/05/13/5-13-24-mothers-day/
4. Corsair Open GT. Munchen, Germany. 62 players. 6 players.

1. Necrons (Hyper) 6-0
   
2. Black Templar (Ironstorm) 5-1
   
3. Blood Angels (GTF) 5-1
   
4. Death Guard 5-1
   
5. Thousand Sons 5-1
   
6. GSC 5-1
   
7. Death Guard 5-1
   

DK Slagmark Fyn. Aarup, Denmark. 53 players. 5 rounds.
An event from last weekend.

1. Thousand Sons 5-0
   
2. Orks (Bully) 4-1
   
3. Custodes (Auric) 4-1
   
4. World Eaters 4-1
   
5. Grey Knights 4-1
   
6. Chaos Daemons 4-1
   
7. World Eaters 4-1
   
8. Aeldari 4-1
   
9. Chaos Daemons 4-1
   

II Jugar x Jugar Homoludicus. Granollers, Spain. 38 players. 5 rounds.

1. Grey Knights 5-0
   
2. Orks (Bully) 4-1
   
3. Grey Knights 4-1
   
4. Grey Knights 4-1
   
5. Chaos Knights 4-1
   

Conquest Italia – Showdown. Ciampino, Italy. 32 players. 5 rounds.

1. Tau 5-0
   
2. Necrons (CC) 4-1
   
3. Guard 4-1
   
4. Necrons (CC) 4-1
   
5. Black Templars (Ironstorm) 4-1
   

Midwest Conquest GT 2024. Independence, MO. 32 players. 5 rounds.

1. Dark Angels (Ironstorm) 5-0
   
2. Necrons (Awakened) 4-1
   
3. Grey Knights 4-1
   
4. Tau 4-1
   
5. Dark Angles (Ironstorm) 4-1
   
6. Grey Knights 4-1
   

Turbulent Warhammer 40K. Sioux Falls, South Dakota. 28 players. 5 rounds.

1. Black Templars (Ironstorm) 5-0
   
2. Blood Angels (Sons) 4-1
   
3. World Eaters 4-1
   
4. Necrons (Hyper) 4-1
   
5. CSM 4-1
   

Carnage - Season 2 - Round 3 – Warpsurge. Hull, England. 28 players.

1. Thousand Sons 5-0
   
2. Orks (Bully) 4-1
   
3. Necrons (CC) 4-1
   
4. Orks (Bully) 4-1
   
5. Tau (Kroot) 4-1
   

South Coast 40K May GT. England. 26 players. 5 rounds.

1. Orks (Bully Boyz) 5-0
   
2. Aeldari 4-1
   
3. Space Wolves (GTF) 4-1
   
4. World Eaters 4-1
   
5. Blood Angels (Sons) 4-1
   

Lincon 2024. Ostergotlands, Sweden. 26 players. 5 rounds.
WTC Scoring

1. Orks (Dread Mob) 4-0-1
   
2. Sisters 3-0-2
   

See the full Data Table at https://40kmetamonday.wordpress.com/2024/05/13/5-13-24-mothers-day/
Takeaways:
Not to much to see this weekend but its interesting to see Orks, Black Templers and Necrons seeing lots of play and doing well in this new Meta.

Last year's four-way tie between Alexandra Daddario, Karen Gillan, Anna Kendrick, and Kiernan Shipka in the final round (all with 20%) resulted in the first sudden death vote-off in Sexiest Woman history. In the end, the title belonged to Shipka in her second consecutive try (and after her third place finish with Sydney Sweeney the year before).
Now, in its 25th year, 90 ladies have one thing in mind...or make that two: Become not only Sexiest Woman of 2024, but Silver Anniversary Sexiest Woman as well! Beginning with the Juniors (ages 18-30), they are in no particular order:
Group A: Sydney Sweeney (2022 third-place finisher) Dua Lipa Camila Mendes Kelsea Ballerini Millie Bobby Brown Madelyn Cline Halle Bailey Kaia Gerber Sabrina Carpenter Florence Pugh
Group B: Zendaya Madelaine Petsch (2022 runner-up) Olivia Rodrigo Dakota Fanning Anya Taylor-Joy Addison Rae Maddie Ziegler Charli D'Amelio Sammi Hanratty Lili Reinhart
Group C: Jenna Ortega Kaitlyn Dever Lily Chee Olivia "Livvy" Dunne Elle Fanning Rachel Pizzolato Kathryn Newton Kendall Jenner Camila Cabello Megan Thee Stallion
Next, we have the Seniors:
Group A: Emma Stone Natalie Portman (2002 runner-up) Lucy Hale Olivia Wilde Margot Robbie Emily Blunt Reese Witherspoon Sofia Vergara Katy Perry Selena Gomez
Group B: Heidi Klum Julianne Moore Alison Brie Taylor Swift Jessica Chastain Demi Moore Aubrey Plaza Kate Beckinsale (2021 third-place finisher) Anne Hathaway Mariska Hargitay
Group C: Jessica Biel Eiza Gonzalez Kristen Stewart Emily Ratajkowski Karen Gillan Jennifer Lawrence Kirsten Dunst Emma Roberts Nina Dobrev Vanessa Hudgens
And lastly, the Leftovers!
Group A: Padma Lakshmi Hailee Steinfeld (2018 third-place finisher) Tate McRae Victoria Justice Rachel Zegler Jennifer Lopez (2001 runner-up) Rita Ora Alessandra Ambrosio Keke Palmer Dove Cameron
Group B: Shakira Kelly Clarkson Kylie Jenner Caylee Cowan Joey King Olivia Ponton Lupita Nyong'o Xochitl Gomez Elizabeth Hurley Renee Rapp
Group C: Hunter Schafer Hannah Waddingham Kira Kosarin Christina Aguilera (1999 runner-up) Jennifer Garner (2005 runner-up) Katherine McNamara Halle Berry Ella Purnell Olivia Culpo Ariana Madix
Now anybody who's followed Sexiest Woman for 25 years over on Usenet knows how the whole elimination process goes; but for you newbies on Reddit, here it is:
Top 20 ladies from each category advance to Round 2, where the field is narrowed to ten apiece; when we resume in the fall with Round 3, the categories are merged and last year's third place finisher (which was Anna Kendrick) joins the remaining field; top 20 after that joins Alexandra Daddario (last year's runner-up and 2022 winner) in Round 4.
The remaining ten ladies -- plus one or two more from the Second Chance Round, which features ten eliminees from previous rounds -- will meet Shipka in the final round for the Sexiest Woman of 2024 title! But for the 25th anniversary this year...it won't end there!!!!
That's because this year's winner -- as well as the aforementioned Taylor Swift, who I named Sexiest Woman of the Decade in 2019 (but still has yet to win the annual title) -- plus all of our past winners (which will be listed in a separate post) will be competing for the very special title of Silver Anniversary Sexiest Woman!!!
But for right now...voting is now OPEN in Round 1; you get up to 20 votes per group so use them any way you can.
Oh, and the voting limits are as follows: Round 1: 20 times per group Round 2: 30 times per category Round 3: 40 times Round 4: 50 times Second Chance and special rounds: 10 times Final Round: As many times as you like!!!

There was a boy. I’d known him since I was 5 but it wasn’t until I was older that I truly noticed him. We were in 6th grade when we started taking an advanced math class together. I could tell he was smart, funny, and a person I’d want to be around for a long time. Middle school and all the drama that ensues during that time quickly invaded my life. My social group shifted and I found myself closer to my friend, Dakota. By the time we were in 7th grade he was tall and strong. Blond hair and a light greenish set of smart eyes. We started working together outside of school. My dad worked for his dad and I often found myself at their house. Dakota had one older brother, a younger brother, and a younger sister. I’m the oldest of four so I could handle the chaos of lots of kids in a home. I had some of my most fun memories in middle school at that home. Not just me and Dakota, but with other friends we worked with, our siblings, and family friends. Nerf gun fights, swimming in the pool, and playing manhunt on the homestead that they lived on. I developed what you could consider a crush on Dakota. And the feeling was mutual. He hinted with the not-so-subtle flirting of a 14 year old boy. Pulling my hair, taking my things, and throwing snacks were often his go-to moves.
One night at a Christmas party, us “kids” were watching a movie while the adults played games and hung out in the other room. At some point, his head ended up on my lap. I remember touching his hair, but ultimately deciding I did NOT want someone to see this and assume the worse. Another time, we were alone in the basement. The basement was the place of all our friend hangouts. The video and board games were down there, along with the nerf guns. One night we were on the couch showing each other memes from our iPod touches. We were laughing and joking, then he handed me his iPod to read the next one. Except this wasn’t a meme: it was his notes app. On the screen it said “I think you are beautiful”. I instantly blushed and tried to hide my face. “Me?.....” I looked at him, also blushing red and he nodded. I told him thank you. It was the first time any boy had told me I was beautiful. In my own eyes, I was not. I had a big tooth gap because my parents couldn’t afford braces, and I wore glasses. I don’t know what he saw, but I appreciated the flattering compliment.
We entered high school where once again, your life shifts. You are faced with new teachers, new course materials, new teammates, and new challenges. We remained close friends through this time, by taking enough classes together and being involved with the same friends. It was nearing the fall homecoming season and I was nervous about getting a date. I saw many older boys asking girls to be their dates and I wondered if I would even have one my freshman year. Leave it up to my best friend Anna to set me up.
I clearly remember it was a Sunday night and I was watching football. My mom tells me she got a text from Dakota’s mom that there was a book she needed to grab from their house. She told me I needed to go with her. Without any context, I was annoyed she was making ME drive her there since I did not want to leave home. They lived about 5 minutes away so I figured the faster we leave the quicker I can get back home. Mom told me I should brush my hair.
“Why?”
“Well because you should look a little presentable.”
“It’s fine right, we’re just grabbing a book really quick, right?”
“Yes but you don’t want to leave the house looking like you do.”
I huffed and opened our sliding glass door going outside to the car.
“You should at least put some shoes on!”
“I’m FINE, Can we just go and get this over with”
I angrily and annoyed drove/ sped down the paved road to their house, all the while questioning my mother why she really needed me to go with her.
“I don’t know, there might be something there for you.”
I had no idea what that meant. We drove to the shop on their property that this supposed book was. I stepped out of the car, barefoot on the gravel and walked into the shop. There I see Dakota, holding a sign. I frantically looked around to figure out what was going on. I see Anna crouched in a corner covering her smiling mouth. I looked at his sign and read the homecoming proposal which used lyrics and titles from Beatles songs, my favorite band.
“Oh, Dakota! Of course yes!”
I gave him an awkward hug and turned around to realize that my mother didn’t need a book at all.
Dakota was sweet. In an innocent way. He had casually asked before if we could date, but being the reserved and shy individual I was, I had always declined. After the dance, we drifted, not for any particular reason. I heard he had started dating a different girl. She was older by two years. Was I hurt? Not particularly. Was I jealous? Maybe a little more so. They went to prom together and she was definitely way prettier than me. It happens, I thought, we aren’t meant to be. A romantic relationship would definitely change our entire chemistry.
Summer came and we were out working together on his family’s farm. We spent hours in the fields, talking, singing, and sweating. Just good friends again. It was normal and felt right. We spent a week together in late July on a church trip. We worked on a homeless shelter with our youth group and had a fun yet powerful time together. My mom, dad, and brother were on this trip as well, along with many of our church friends. After the week was done on Saturday, we drove back to our town. I remember waving goodbye to his family in their Suburban as they left the church parking lot. I didn’t realize how significant that goodbye would be.
A few days went by and we had casual texting conversations about work and school starting in the next few weeks. He texted me Tuesday night that his dad really needed some help the next morning bright and early. I wanted to sleep in. He texted “Don’t worry about it, we’ll get it covered.” A decision I’d soon regret.
Wednesday morning, I go to the church with my mom to do a couple of things with her. I can’t even recall what it was. We were getting into our car when we heard loud sirens throughout our small town. Mom and I looked at each other. Sirens are never a good sign. We get in the car, curious, but praying whoever needs the ambulance is okay. My mom gets a phone call. It’s one of our family friends. She says Dakota and his older brother have been in a bad car accident. That heavy feeling that makes your heart sink to your stomach instantly hit me. “They’re okay, they’re okay, they’re okay.” I kept telling myself. The ambulance was going fast, and Dakota is strong. He’s practically invincible. My mother’s friend tells us that we should stop by Dakota’s house to grab the boys clean clothes and bring them to the emergency room. We drive in silence, except for maybe a short prayer that the boys are okay. We get to the house and my mom quickly runs up the stairs to the boys’ bedroom. I stay downstairs. I observe the dining room. Dirty laundry in the baskets. Dirty dishes on the counter. Dakota’s name on a marker board along with a list of chores to do. We speed to the emergency room in the nearby town. On the way we received a text from Dakota’s older brother, John. He said he was doing okay but he wasn’t sure about Dakota. We should be keeping their family in our prayers. The panic was rising in my throat. I had been nervous about things before. This was different. It was like a nauseating churn that started in my stomach. Like my soul was shaking out of my physical body. We got to the hospital, parked and my mom said I should stay in the car. Probably wanting to protect me from any scarring sights within the ER. I wanted to go in. Could I see him? She insisted that I stay in the car. I stayed. Frozen at first. Then rocking back and forth. My palms were shaking and itchy in the center.
“This can’t be happening. Not Dakota. He’s like my best friend. Kids don’t die. He’s too young. Too smart. He has an incredibly successful life ahead of him.”
I was eyeing the automatic door for any sign of someone that I recognized. The ten minutes I waited felt like an hour. Ten minutes of restless uncertainty. Then I see my mom. She had one of the hardest faces that I had ever seen her make. She opened the driver’s side door and I immediately asked “What’s going on. Is he ok?!”
She looks at me dead in the eyes, shaking her head, “He didn’t make it, Jasmine”
A million emotions and questions flood my brain. I started blubbering and sobbing while hitting the dashboard. “No, no, no. Why!? Why him?” My mom breaks down with me, not able to get out a single word. The family friend who delivered the phone call joins us in the car. She says Dakota’s in a better place now. I’m in a state of shock and disbelief. Hot tears will not stop streaming down my cheeks. We were silent on the way back home. I ran upstairs to my room and shut the door. I cried into a pillow for the rest of the afternoon. I skipped dinner. There was a candlelight vigil that evening at a church. I barely had the strength to go, but my mom said it would be good for me. I brought my water bottle. I ate nothing and only drank water to replenish my tears the next two days. Saturday morning, I went to a different church with my family to see Dakota’s family. The church’s youth were making survivor bracelets out of parachute cord. Dakota had made them during his depressive episodes during his 9th grade year, when we somewhat drifted. Dakota and I took Spanish class together our freshman year. One day he asked me what my favorite color was. I told him blue. The next day he gave me a blue bracelet he had made. He said he accidentally made one too small. I was instantly brought back to that moment while standing in the church with dozens of people learning how to braid the cord. When I got home, I tore apart my vanity in search for the bracelet he had made for me. I put it on my right hand. I wore the bracelet everyday for an entire year. I had a Dakota original.
Dakota’s brother, John, who was entering his senior year, invited many of us friends to go out to the place where the accident happened. It was a blind intersection that I had previously been weary of earlier that summer. The corn was high and there were no road signs for a yield or stop. John explained how they had just got in the truck after working the field about a half mile south and were going to take their lunch break. He said they had just started going down the road, picking up speed, when he heard a small voice tell him to put his seatbelt on. John put his seatbelt on, but Dakota didn’t. John said he felt as if there was something around the corner, but ultimately did not slow down near the intersection. A driver, going 50 miles per hour, t-boned them in the intersection. According to John, the truck rolled and Dakota was thrown through the windshield. John found his phone and quickly called 911. He found Dakota and blood was coming from his mouth. He had a large wound on his forehead where he had smashed the dashboard. John pulled him into the field of soybeans, opposite the corn, and tried performing CPR. Dakota was mumbling and sputtering blood before his breathing stopped. The paramedics pronounced him dead at the scene. They said he was internally decapitated.
The wake for Dakota was on Sunday night. I had a tough time finding the strength to go. We waited in line behind dozens of people for close to an hour. When I finally got up to him, my heart sank again. There he was. His skin was pale. His hair was not right. His mother, who was right by, said it was okay to touch him. I reached for his hair to move it how he usually wore it. As I parted it, I saw the large scar covered by gobs of makeup that the hair was covering on his forehead. I put it back.
His funeral was the next day. Monday. At 1:18PM, his birthday date. I felt sick the whole morning. My whole family got in the car and my mom was talking to my younger siblings. I was silent. I was going to one of my best friends’ funerals. The church where the funeral was held was absolutely packed. Parked cars took up the surrounding blocks. The church had multiple floors and rooms with casted video of the celebration of life. I was considered close enough to sit in the sanctuary in the front half of the pews. I sat with my gifted teacher and other friends from the gifted program. What a terrible way to end your summer. Saying hello to people you haven’t seen in a few months at a funeral. I remember the funeral. There were songs and the service was led in large by Dakota’s own mother. To this day I have no idea how she had the strength to do that. I remember a few of the songs that were sung, but I’ll never forget the sound of the casket closing. The last goodbye. The final SLAM. His face would never again have sunlight shown upon it. Never again would a person touch him, hold him, hug him.
My family tried to get out to the burial but the crowd was just too insanely large to get around. I had the final say that we could go home. I’d come back another time.
The next day, I went to the scene of the accident. It was an intersection 5 miles east of my house. Someone had put up a make-shift cross at the intersection. I brought a big University of Kansas patch from one of our gifted trips to place at the cross. He loved basketball, and especially the Jayhawks. On the back of the patch I had written “I love you”. That night, there was a big storm. I sat up straight in bed and started crying as the wind whistled by my windows. The patch.
When I woke up, I found a reason to leave home and went back out to the intersection. I ran up to the cross and found my patch wrapped tightly around the base with some old barbed wire. I burst into tears of relief. I have no idea who saved my patch.
The next two weeks were spent preparing for school and fall practice. I had decided to do tennis that fall instead of volleyball. On the first day of school, I rode the bus into the town with my school. We drove past the intersection and I burst into tears. I cried four more times that day. Each time in the class he should have been in with me. I was distraught. I have no other way to describe how absolutely depressed I was walking the halls. Teachers were not the same. There was an absence in our sophomore class. An absence on our football team. In our audition choir. In our youth group. And in me. I tried my best to get through it. I started journaling a little bit after the accident to help organize my thoughts. To remember all the little details I could about him. To write them down so they didn’t disappear.
My sophomore year was brutal. I was playing tennis in the fall with a small team of girls who helped to create a safe and calm environment for me. I spent all of my hours in the team vehicle listening to two Lifehouse albums on repeat. I’d look out the window and reflect. What was life? What was my purpose? Why did this happen?
I didn’t have an answer. I bottled it up. It seemed that a lot of my class who weren’t very close with Dakota had a lot easier time going back to their normal lives. I was missing a friend. There was a contact in my phone from whom I’d never received another text. I had unfinished business. We had talked all summer about how our math class and Spanish II classes would be so fun this year. The bracelet I wore everyday was getting a stark tan line.
The semester rolled on. One of my other close friends moved to Colorado. And my last best friend, Anna, was in her own self-discovery phase. She wasn’t as close to Dakota and I was more or less a depressed teen at that time. I cried at school. In the bathrooms. In the locker room or a small music practice room. Am I just that sensitive? Why is no one else dealing with this grief like I am? I tried to distract myself with various activities. It worked for the most part. In the spring, I went out for softball. I loved softball. I had been playing it for years. I even had helped “assistant coach” a little girls rec league with Dakota and his family a few summers beforehand. Softball was hard but I needed the challenge. I worked hard at the sport and found myself on the varsity team after multiple players were out for the season due to injury or illness. In the last regular season game, on May 9th on our home field, I broke my leg. I had a high impact with the catcher while trying to steal home. The ump called me safe and we won the game by a run rule as I crumpled to the ground. I remember thinking I could stand up, but the weirdest tingling started down my leg around my knee. My coach carried me off the field like a baby. I pulled my helmet off and one tear slid down my cheek. They put me on a stretcher while the athletic trainer checked my knee.
“Yep, you fractured a bone. We should get you in to the ER for an X-ray”
“Fracture? Like my bone broke?”
“Yes that’s what a fracture is”
I started sobbing. Not from the pain. From the overwhelming feeling of becoming an invalid for an uncertain amount of time. I slid in the back of my mom’s vehicle as we drove down to the county ER. We got there, I was still in uniform. Just hysterical. I had no idea what was going on as I had never had an injury like this before. The ER lady took X-rays of my right leg. The images came back and showed a tibial plateau fracture. I wouldn’t be walking for a while. They helped cut me out of my softball pants and sent me home with lots of pain killers. The next few days I spent vomiting from the strong norco drug. I had a surgery a few days later where they placed hardware in my knee and put me in a straight-leg brace. I was miserable. It was hot and scratchy and I had my finals coming up. I went back to school the next Wednesday or Thursday to collect some class work to do at home. As I lived on the downstairs couch for close to three weeks I found myself asking again “Why did this happen?” I finished the school year by doing my final projects and giving my German foreign exchange student friend a final hug. I remember thinking “This is a nicer way to say goodbye to someone forever”.
I couldn’t walk for most of the summer and I started painful physical therapy. I was frequenting 3 times a week for a long while to build back my strength and relearn to walk. As soon as I was weight-bearing, I started working outside again. Doing what I could with one crutch. Dakota’s dad hired me to help manage the field workers and I could do some wood stacking decently enough. On the 1 year anniversary of Dakota’s death, I went to the gravesite for a small ceremony. It was the first time I had been there. The intersection where he died was my frequent mourning spot, almost daily on my drive to and from school. The gravestone was large and obviously very expensive. It has a beautiful picture of him and the quote “You got this”, that he used often as a self-reassuring phrase. At some point after the 1-year, I stopped wearing the bracelet he made me. Was it time to let go? How long does one mourn?
The rest of my high school journey was tainted with the memories of him and the phantom memories of where I imagined him being. At my graduation, we had an honorary memorial and scholarship dedicated to him and his character. Then I went to college. I was already dating who would become my husband a number of years later.
Years have passed. There is no happy ending. I'm still here. Aging. Growing older while I can still see the face of my 15 year old friend. He isn’t growing. He’s in the ground. Resting. It feels like a lifetime until I can see him again. I’ve had dreams of him. Unprompted visions of him were prevalent for about 2 years after he passed. You would think this story would get easier after the number of times I’ve played in my head over all of these years. But it hasn’t. I’m in the acceptance stage of grief. I’ve lived life, gotten married, laughed again, and see a bright future for myself. Though I do often think, Where would Dakota be now? Would we have become closer friends? Would he be married? He would have made a good father.
Again, I have no answers to these questions that I suppose may eternally sit with me. I do have some answers though. I’ve learned how to not take people for granted. I’ve learned how to recognize depressive symptoms and how to be a listening ear for someone who feels hopeless. I’ve learned how to find purpose in helping people. I’ve learned patience. Sometimes patience is agonizing, which means the reward is definitely worth the wait.

A Chance Meeting
The telephone rang one day while I was at work, and I answered it in the proper business manner. I was ready to deal with whatever the customer had on his or her mind—only this wasn’t the typical business call. This was a personal call. It was my husband’s best friend and he was calling to inform me of a tragic accident.
My husband had fallen from a roof and hit his head on the concrete where he landed. I immediately put my Al-Anon program to use and said the Serenity Prayer over and over—to “accept the things I cannot change.”
Many times during my years in the Al-Anon program I’ve had to accept that there were people or things in my life I could not change. This was certainly one of those times. The fall happened. It could not be changed. The doctor performed the surgery and did what he could. There was nothing I could do, just as there was nothing I could do when the alcoholic in my life chose to use alcohol. I had to “Let Go and Let God.” I could not change either my husband’s coma or the eventual outcome of his condition.
One month later the Serenity Prayer helped me accept my husband’s death. I am thankful for 13 and a half years of sobriety that we had in our home. Life continues after the death of a loved one. I continue to use the Al-Anon program and the Serenity Prayer daily.
A few years ago on Thanksgiving I entertained my family and after everyone left I was felling somewhat down and alone. As I said my prayers that evening, I shared my loneliness with God, who is my Higher Power. I told Him I was feeling so alone and I thought I might be ready to share my life with someone. I also told Him I’d be open to the idea of a chance meeting.
Shortly after I finished my prayers Timmy, my kitten, jumped onto the bed. He was soon kneading his little paws on my chest, purring loudly enough to be heard in the next room. Soon he was giving me little kitten licks on my chin. After a minute or two, he settled down right next to me.
I chuckled to myself and told God He certainly had a sense of humor. I explained I was thinking of a partner with two legs, and He gave me one with four. Again, I had to accept what I cannot change and change the things I can. For today that means sharing my home with a couple of cats, and not with a man.
By Loretta J., North Dakota October, 2003Reprinted with permission of The Forum, Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc., Virginia Beach, VA.

Full disclosure, I'm the administrator for this program. It's a new insurance policy that is annual with monthly premiums. It provides medical and life coverage within the US. We're also in the Parachutist!
Who is this insurance for?
Any USPA member living in the US and jumping at USPA DZs. This includes TIs and rating holders! Exceptions are California, New York, Massachusetts, Hawaii and South Dakota (licensing issues).
What does it cost and cover?
The monthly premium starts at $14.99 and varies with the plan you want. The general rule of thumb for this insurance is as long as you are following USPA safety requirements and jumping at a USPA DZ, you should be good!
Edit: I’m not a licensed jumper and I messed up. Sorry for the confusion. I meant it as following general safety like not jumping drunk or high, no-pulls, etc.

Plan	Monthly Prem	Death Benefit	Medical Reimbursement Benefit (resets annually)
Saver	$14.99	$50,000	N/A
Basic	$29.99	$50,000	$5,000
Premium	$44.99	$50,000	$10,000

Does this cover BASE Jumping?
Sorry, no.
Who is the insurer?
The policies are issued by Concord Specialty Insurance Company, which is rated A- "Excellent" by AM Best.
If you're interested and want more details or want to purchase, click this link: https://altisafeins.com/membemain
Also feel free to post questions or comments here and I'll try my best to respond!

Vault commissioned by: Big Mountain Research and Development Center
Location: Badlands of the Dakotas
Admittance: A random sample of locals, especially employees of the local research station, or anyone willing to move close to the vaults should be evenly distributed between the two for little to no cost so as to encourage a larger sample Access to the Alpha vault will be sold at a premium with the Beta vault being offered as a "discount" option. [JNC, junior executive at Vault-Tec wrote this change, MCL, senior executive approved]
Purpose: Study survivor behavior when forced to face the mortality of their peers.
Experiment: In the event of a nuclear attack on US soil, the vaults will be opened and allow admittance. Once sealed, Alpha and Beta will find that they have viewports, intercoms, and other ways to communicate between them. Everything will continue as normal for about two years when a manufactured "radiation leak" will contaminate Beta. Automatic systems will report a problem with the air recycling system and claim to be drawing in contaminated outside air, but the truth is that radioactive waste will be accumulated to ensure significant contamination may be achieved regardless of outside environments.
Predictions: The residents of Beta will suffer quickly from the effects of radiation exposure. Depending on where they are in the facility, their deaths may be quick but likely some residents will find the "safer" areas of the vault where their exposure will be slower. Instructions given to both Overseers will emphasize that any incident to befall one vault should be closely studied by the residents of the other under risk of imprisonment or even execution if one refuses to observe. The members of Alpha will be forced to watch their friends and neighbors die of radiation poisoning over the following weeks and months. The outcomes may be unpredictable, but observations on who is able to handle this experience and if order is able to be kept within Vault Alpha will be invaluable to Big MT and their partners. There has already been discussion of selling any analytics from the outcome to militaries in order how to prepare their soldiers or maintain order in the event of catastrophic casualties.
 
Vault 586 Beta Overseer's Terminal:
  2077-23-10:
    The worst has happened. War has come to America. We were lucky to be able to get into this vault, at least. Most of the workers got special deals, their wages were garnished and a spot for them was secured in Beta. A lot of the executives bought a spot in Alpha. We can see through the windows that they have better furniture, decorations, even food. I'm worried about my residents and how they'll maintain being forced to watch other people live better, easier lives every day. But the truth is, that's much how they lived most of their life. And many are simply thankful that they were able to survive at all.
 
  2077-17-12
    Things have been mostly smooth so far. Despite there being quite literal barriers between us, people have started getting along better than I could have expected. I think we have Overseer Elwood to thank for much of that. We've communicated frequently, and he seems like an easy man to follow. Compassionate and decisive. I think he's helping his residents connect to mine in ways they never would have on the surface. We may get through this yet.
 
  2078-04-07
    Big party today. Everyone showed up. Even Robert Parker who had been shunning any interaction with us Betas for months now. People were even talking about seeing if there was any way we could break a window to exchange gifts across the barrier or if we could maybe rig up some kind of exchange mechanism. They were talked out of it, just in case anything happens. We barely survived one disaster. We shouldn't be tempting fate any further. But I think it goes to show the sense of community we've built up between us. There's been some animosity, but it's mostly been headed off by Overseer Elwood and me. But we have a long road ahead of us and whoever comes after. It's no time to lose vigilance now.
 
  2078-23-10
    One year we've been in here now and it's starting to get to people. I've got it easier. I have a lot of people who grew up without anything in my ranks. They're used to scraping by. The Alphas, on the other hand, a bunch of spoiled brats. I'm sorry. I shouldn't say things like that about them. They're good people. Or. They CAN be good people. When they choose to be. Overseer Elwood said he had to put Pamela Perkins in containment last week after she threw such a fit that someone ended up bleeding. Said he scratched the skin right off her neighbor's face. All over some snack cakes and an old radio show. We're doing our best to keep order, but the cracks are starting to show.
 
  2079-05-04
    The first real disaster hit today. Alphas' water purifier broke down for about nine days. As per Vault-Tec instructions, the Betas watched how the Alphas addressed the problem. The Betas are floor workers, mechanics, janitors, even a few researchers. They're used to this kind of work and tried to give advice through the barriers. But the Alphas weren't having it. Said we were there to spectate, not commentate. If they hadn't been so stubborn, they'd have had clean water within two days. Instead, it took them nine. They act all high and mighty, but they need us. If only that oaf of a leader they had could admit that. I once thought Elwood was a good guy, but now I think he can take a short ride on a long rocket.
 
  2080-06-08
    Now's when we can show them who knows what they're doing. We had a catastrophic failure of our air recyclers and purifiers all at once. The western wing got blasted with radiation so bad we had to lock it down. The Hendersons are in there. Probably were by now. We can't get to them, but the Alphas can still see them. But those bastards won't even tell me if my people are still alive. But unlike them, we know our way around these machines. Hell, some of us helped BUILD these machines. We'll be back to clean air in no time. Whereas if one of their Nuka-Cola machines is one degree off, it takes them a month and a vault-wide panic before they can get the damn thing fixed.
 
  2080-09-08
    The problem appears to be worse than we thought. Actually, it appears to be a fucking ghost. I've got some of the best mechanics and engineers in the country, hell, maybe some of the last in the world, here in my vault. And they can't figure a damn thing wrong with any of the equipment. It should all be running fine. They even did an analysis on the air coming directly out of the purifier and they say it's rad-free. But just ten feet away and it's at extremely dangerous levels. It's like someone hung a plutonium rod from the ceiling like a goddamn decoration and we're all too blind to see it. I've lost a lot of good people trying to figure it out and it's only gotten worse. We're down to the last few men available. Which means that tomorrow, I've got to throw myself into the shit. I stayed out of it this long thinking that my leadership would be worth more than whatever I could do with a wrench, but that's just not true anymore. Maybe it never was. Maybe Elwood was right.
 
  2090-02-03
    I finally got back. Looking at my last entry, it was nearly ten years ago I went to try and fix that leak. Turns out there was no fucking leak. We're working on the air systems and there's an explosion. We get blasted with a pile of nuclear waste buried under our purifier. Now, who do you think put that there? I should have died there. The rest of the crew did. Most of the vault has by now. One of the Hendersons is still alive somehow. Like me. Skin falling off, hair falling out, voice like I smoked coming out the womb. I've met a few others, too. You should see how the Alphas react to us now. They've always looked at us Betas with disgust. Now they look at us in terror. I'm going to be working to get Wendy out of the west wing first, then we'll make plans from there.
 
  2093-25-11
    There are eight of us left in total. The whole vault, despite all the damage and all the lockdowns, we finally cleared it all out. We started with over four hundred and we're down to eight. Truth be told, I think we're lucky to have that many. And there had been one more. John Kriger. I used to play cards with that man. Back when he was a man. When we were fixing some doors in the south wing, we found him. There was nothing left behind those eyes. He growled and shrieked like an animal and nearly killed Frank. We put him out of whatever misery he was in. I think we've all been wondering if we're any better off. I know I have.
 
  2094-02-01
    Not much to do anymore. We have enough food. Radiation doesn't seem to hurt us anymore, so the air isn't an issue. Our water spikes a Geiger counter, but Frank tells me it just adds to the flavor. Tastes like spicy static to me, what little sense of taste I have left. So I spent most of my days with Wendy watching the Alphas. They try to ignore us. Pretend we're not there. But they're not doing much better. They broke their intercoms, put posters over a bunch of the windows. But there's always a way to keep an eye on them. One thing I've been wondering has been where Elwood's been hiding. I haven't seen him lately.
 
  2094-03-09
    All hell's broken loose over at the Alpha's vault. Turned out that Elwood had died in the decade I spent clawing my way back up from the basement. Good riddance to him I say. But the ones since then have been worse. Playing favorites, letting maintenance slide. I'm still getting the automated reports from Alpha's terminal and things have been steadily going to shit. Looks like they finally snapped. Glass was too thick to hear anything, but I noticed when one of the rooms got brighter. I went to check it out, and the poster had been torn down, replaced by a large smear of blood. They were having their own little revolution. And there was nothing the eight of us could do but look on in horror as they slaughtered each other. Turns out that while we thought we got the shit end of the stick, we're still living in peace and harmony. They, on the other hand, couldn't make it twenty years without butchering each other. It's hard to make out what's going on with most of the windows still covered. But I would hazard to guess that their numbers are more similar to ours at this point.
 
  2098-10-08
    Today's my rebirth day. Wendy asked me what I wanted to do to celebrate, and I said I wanted to never see this godforsaken place again. It's too sad to pass by the windows and see what the Alphas squandered. The windows are still mostly covered, but we haven't seen anything out of them in a few years now. I figure they're probably all dead. Or maybe they wised up and left. Didn't even leave a note. So that's what I want to do. Get out of here and don't look back. Hell, it's not like we need to worry about the radiation. I can't imagine it could be worse out there than it is down here. Six of us are going and we'll be leaving the door open. Suzy wants to stay with Clark. Clark has started to... I don't know what to call. He's got the sort of undead dementia John had. It's not as bad yet. He's not charging us on sight. But he doesn't look like he has much time left. Suzy says she wants to stay with him to the end. Either end his misery for him or join him in it, I can't be certain. But the rest of us are leaving. About time. Twenty-one years I've been cooped up in this shithole. I'll breathe real air and see the actual sun again. I can't wait.

After our soft opener (Winnipeg at Cleburne last night), today the entire American Association is in action! After taking a look at the East Division yesterday, today we switch gears and try to shake out how things will unfold in the West.
As I mentioned yesterday, AA rosters have much less continuity than recent years due to a large drain of experienced players going to the Mexican League after they loosened roster restrictions on foreign players. Without further ado:
FARGO-MOORHEAD REDHAWKS
2023 Record: 51-49 (4th, L 1st round vs. Sioux City)
Season Outlook: Entering 2023 as defending AA champions, Fargo-Moorhead returned the majority of their championship roster (including nearly their whole lineup)...and just never got going. Chris Coste has had winning teams more often than not entering year 5 at the helm, so he's looking for a bounceback from a lot of familiar faces this year.
The RedHawks return 15 players, including a whopping ten pitchers off a staff that was middle of the pack a year ago. Tyler Grauer (6-4, 4.38), Davis Feldman (3-1, 2.42, then sold to Toronto), and late-season revelation Colten Davis (7-0, 2.15) will return to front the rotation with Alex Dubord and Garrett Alexander back to shore up the back end. Offensively, several multi-year starters move on, but key contributors such as Dillon Thomas (.344, 8 HR, 35 RBI in 56 games), Evan Alexander (.281, 9 HR, 30 SB), and captain Sam Dexter (.271, 7 HR, 47 RBI) are back. As for newcomers, Frontier League veterans Dakota Phillips (.275, 12 HR, 74 RBI) and Kona Quiggle (.268, 12 HR, 59 RBI) come over, while Yoelqui Cespedes (half-brother of Yoenis) is an intriguing power hitter making his Indy ball debut. The pitching side almost all comes back, but Orlando Rodriguez is a new arm to watch.
I actually feel pretty good about this roster, so I'm expecting considerable improvement from 2023. How far does that improvement take them? That's less clear.
KANSAS CITY MONARCHS
2023 Record: 59-40 (1st, W Miles Wolff Cup Finals vs. Chicago)
Season Outlook: Death, taxes, and Kansas City having an absolute wagon. The Monarchs won their third AA title in six years last season after cruising to the division title with the best record in the league. Joe Calfapietra has never won fewer than 57 games in his first six seasons at the helm in KC, so the expectation is title or bust—and they often get there. Last season required a pretty significant rebuild, which the Monarchs did seamlessly, and this year is shaping up to be the same.
Kansas City returns just four players, with starters Dalton Moats (5-3, 4.61) and Ashton Goudeau (2-1, 2.57, plus 3-0, 1.37 in 2023 playoffs) back alongside back-end arm Grant Gavin (6-4, 3.88, 78 K in 51 innings). The entire offense (first in HR, second in runs in 2023) is being rebuilt with only 28 at-bats (from one player), returning. Former MLB 1st-round picks Blake Rutherford (.336, 12 HR, 49 RBI) and Travis Swaggerty are the headliners, alongside another Triple-A bat in Tucker Bradley (.277, 7 HR, 55 RBI) and a power threat in Frankie Tostado (.240, 14 HR, 78 RBI). Pitching-wise, Will McAffer (0-2, 4.87) returns to the AA, where he was excellent in Winnipeg in 2022. Virtually the rest of the incoming staff are Double-A/Triple-A vets who have enjoyed some success at the pro level.
There's often not a lot of flash on the pitching side of KC's teams, but they usually end up with a top-4 staff by the end of the year. Combine that with an offense shaping up to be dangerous and Joe C. and company are ready for a title defense.
LINCOLN SALTDOGS
2023 Record: 48-52 (5th)
Season Outlook: The Lincoln Saltdogs have mastered the art of being mediocre, having been within five games of .500 (on either side) in 12 of the last 15 years, though last year saw them three games out of the postseason. Brett Jodie is back for his fourth year in charge in Lincoln and is trying to see if this is the year he finally gets things over the hump.
Lincoln returns a decent core of nine players, highlighted by starters Abdallah Aris (6-4, 4.51, 77 Ks) and Zach Keenan (4-6, 4.98), along with stud reliever Walter Borkovich (2.57 ERA, 46 K in 26 games) on the pitching side, as well as All-Stars Nick Anderson (.276, 20 HR, 58 RBI, 16 SB) and Drew Devine (.282, 7 HR, 12 SB), and rock-solid Luke Roskam (.294, 14 HR, 62 RBI) and Zane Zurbrugg (.304, 4 HR, 12 SB in 54 games) pacing the offense. As far as newcomers, Lincoln raided Pioneer League champion Ogden, bringing in six former Raptors (and nine PBL guys in total), most notably Logan Williams (.314, 13 HR, 72 RBI) and Pioneer League Reliever of the Year Dan Kubiuk (0.50 ERA, 15 saves, 50 K in 35.2 IP).
A lot will hinge on how well the Pioneer League cast performs with a step up in competition, but maybe just maybe this is the year for Lincoln to break the mold. If the PBL guys falter, then Lincoln probably spends September at home again.
SIOUX CITY EXPLORERS
2023 Record: 52-48 (T-2nd, L West Division Finals vs. Kansas City)
Season Outlook: Sioux City was on the verge of a huge upset of Kansas City, but blew a 5-0 lead in the 7th inning of a decisive Game 3 of the West Finals to make it a perfect 0-for-30 years in terms of championships. Steve Montgomery, the longest-tenured skipper in the AA, is back for Year 10 in Siouxland (with a new nine-year extension) with as many 70-win seasons as non-playoff seasons (two). The X's are always competitive, but also haven't won more than 53 games since 2019.
The X's will return 11 players, most notably John Nogowski (.317, 4 HR, 20 BB, 9 K in 34 games) and Scott Ota (.311, 7 HR, 25 RBI in 38 games), who were both huge down the stretch last year. Two-time AA Defensive Player of the Year Chase Harris is back, looking to rebound from a career-worst year (.210, 5 HR, 26 SB). Veteran relievers Nate Gercken and Brandon Brosher both have had considerable success, but are back to looking to bounce back after so-so seasons. Among new acquisitions, Nick Shumpert is the most notable, with two years of AA experience. It's hard to figure out what else is going on for SC because as of Wednesday night (when I'm typing this), the X's have just nine position players listed. Obviously, a few more hitters will be signed by Friday (hey, Nate Samson is still available...).
All I can say is that Mongo will usually figure it out and the X's will be OK, but that's probably it: just OK. That said, based on their current roster compared to the rest of the division, I could very well see them on the outside looking in come playoff time.
SIOUX FALLS CANARIES
2023 Record: 52-48 (T-2nd, L 1st round vs. Kansas City)
Season Outlook: Last season was an unqualified success for the Birds as Charlie Hasty and the offense covered up a lot of deficiencies, earning the squad's first winning season and playoff berth in a full season since 2010 (SF was 31-27 and lost the AA Finals in the shortened 2020 campaign). Now comes the hard part: building off of it. In the sad-sack 31-year history of the Canaries, they only have seven winning seasons—and only once have they posted them back-to-back (they've never made the playoffs twice in a row). Mike Meyer is back for his 7th season (with a well-deserved extension) trying to make 2023 the foundation, not the apex.
The Birds are bringing back a lot, keeping a league-high 17 players around, including both catchers and possible the best outfield in the league (Mike Hart, Hunter Clanin, and Wyatt Ulrich), alongside franchise icon Jabari Henry (3rd in all-time AA home runs) and breakout infielder Jordan Barth (.298, 11 HR, 66 RBI, 16 SB). Eight arms return from the league's worst pitching staff a year ago, but ace relievers Charlie Hasty (2.28 ERA, 22 saves) and Brady Stover (4-0, 2.82 in 25 games) are back, as are steady (if unspectactular) starters Mitchell Walters (8-5, 5.02, 92 Ks) and Ty Culbreth (7-5, 6.23, 108.1 IP). However, the big pitching story is the signing of All-Star Ryan Zimmerman (10-3, 3.35, 100 Ks) from Milwaukee, who immediately slots in as a bona-fide ace. Josh Rehwaldt (.315, 29 HR, 90 RBI, 18 SB) is an impressive offensive acquisition after consecutive 29-HR seasons in the Frontier League.
Sioux Falls appears to be trying to slug their way into the postseason again, but with the front-line starter they've been lacking and plenty of ammo offensively, their chances are more than fair.
WINNIPEG GOLDEYES
2023 Record: 43-57 (6th)
Season Outlook: As many predicted, the Greg Tagert experiment failed miserably as he went one-and-done in Manitoba, crashing the Goldeyes into the basement for the first time in the 30-year history of the franchise. New manager Logan Watkins is in after leading Cleburne to three playoff appearances in as many seasons, looking to guide the proud franchise back to prominence.
The Fish bring back seven returners, though former MVP Max Murphy (.286, 26 HR, 84 RBI) and Rookie of the Year Dayson Croes (.351, 3 HR, 67 RBI) are great starting pieces, as is Miles Simington (.329 in 47 games). Joey Matulovich (5-9, 3.78, 121 Ks) and Landon Bourassa (11-6, 4.62, 109.0 IP) were Winnipeg's top starters in 2023 and come back, while Travis Seabrooke is as durable of a bullpen arm there is (league-record 60 games in 2022). There are notable additions in the return of Tasker Strobel (3.41 ERA and 21 saves for Winnipeg in 2022), while the offense gets a boost from a surprise re-appearance of veteran Edwin Arroyo (career. 310 average in 4 AA seasons) and Gio Brusa (16 HR, 63 RBI in 2022). Roby Enriquez and Adam Hall are signings out of affiliated ball who could turn some heads.
One thing I have no doubt of: Winnipeg will be better this year. The climb is steeper in a tough division, but they kept virtually everyone worth keeping and added some very nice pieces around them. A winning record and playoff berth are absolutely within reach.
Final Division Standings Prediction
Going through all of these previews, I believe that most of the West is better than most of the East and that there is no truly bad team in this division. I waffled back and forth on about every spot. Either way, make no mistake, all six teams absolutely have a playoff shot.

1. Kansas City
2. Fargo-Moorhead
3. Winnipeg
4. Sioux Falls
5. Lincoln
6. Sioux City

Hello.
I live in South Dakota. Enrolled member.
This year I was diagnosed with Hiatal Hernia and need surgery done. But the IHS won't refer me to a city hospital like Rapid City or Sioux Falls because they said they have their own surgeon.
So, here is where my short story comes in about me trying to avoid the rez hospital. I was in the ER back in late March and I was talking with one of the nurses and told her about going to see a surgeon here on the rez hospital. She told me I should get a second opinion before I see this doctor and she couldn't go into detail, but it sounded like she was trying give me a heads up. I wish I could have pressed her more, but I didn't and regret it. I looked into this certain surgeon, and he does have a negative review from back east but also a positive review, the only two reviews I could find basically lol.
I try to apply for Medicaid, but they said I make too much, and I barely make anything, so I called and asked and apparently, I make just a few hundred more, 400 extra to be exact to qualify.
I tried other IHS hospitals (called a head of time) in the state to get a referral to Rapid City or Sioux Falls, but they will not refer me out due to the fact I don't live on their reservations.
In so many words I am fucked. It looks like I have to go to surgery on the rez and I don't have a good feeling about this doctor. I want to go surgery to fix this issue, but it looks like I am stuck with Doctor Kevorkian lol I am doing everything to avoid going surgery on a rez hospital, but all my options are out of my hands.
I was denied Medicaid and other IHS clinics and hospitals say I don't live on their reservations to get referred out.
I did talk with the PRC Purchased Referred Care at this IHS to push for me to get referred out but denied me twice. I can't seem to avoid doctor death LOL. Maybe he is a good doctor but if a nurse is telling you to get a second opinion and told me to push to get referred out then there must be something wrong with this certain doctor who does surgeries.
My question is this for you. Would you trust going to an IHS surgeon and getting surgery done? and what would you do in my situation.?
UPDATE ON POST: I forgot to add he's a trauma surgeon and not a gastroenterologist and it's the gastroenterologist that do the endoscopy surgery. I should have mentioned that earlier when I posted this question. And that info came from my provider who was trying to referral me out to monument health in Rapid City before Pine Ride Hospital said NO twice.
Thanks, and would like to read some feedback.

In case you didn't know, Dianne C. Luce is one of the deserving Cormac McCarthy scholars emeritus. Back when I was reading all critical literature on McCarthy, it was her bibliography on the McCarthy site that I was always turning to.
I hardly care that my posts here mostly get downvoted, for my 2002 review of John Sepich's NOTES ON BLOOD MERIDIAN is still the most voted for at Amazon, as is my 2009 review of Luce's previous book, READING THE WORLD: MCCARTHY'S TENNESSEE PERIOD (2009).
I have not profited from my reviews in any monetary way. Neither Sepich nor Luce have offered me free copies. not even a thank you. I'm an independent scholar, not an academic. True scholarship is, and always has been, and always should be, its own reward.
I highly recommend Luce's work, elated by what she has given us, yet disappointed by what she left out--or maybe had to leave out for editorial reasons. For instance, she doesn't even mention Nelson Algren, a source for THE ORCHARD KEEPER's many cat symbols and many other things as well. McCarthy was writing SUTTREE at the same time, and both Algren and McCarthy got some bad press labels as purposely slumming, being "champions of the stumblebum." Ruder forms survive.
As I've said before, want to know why McCarthy wrote CHILD OF GOD? Take a look at Algren's LONESOME MONSTERS.
Here's a good review of THE ORCHARD KEEPER from May, 1965, appearing in THE KANSAS CITY STAR, which Luce must have neglected for editorial reasons:
Once in Long, Long While There Gomes Such a Novel By Theodore M. O'Leary --This is a rare book that, coming unexpectedly, gives fresh hope and zest to a man whose job is to read books and who, even with the best will in the world toward them, more often is disappointed than enamored. Alan Paton's' Cry, the Beloved Country was one of them. Ken Kesey's One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest was one of them. So is Cormac McCarthy's The Orchard Keeper.
Knowing that novels like this by hitherto unknown writers are possible is enough to keep a man reading novels by unknown writers. McCarthy, who is 33, never made it through the University of Tennessee although ho tried twice. The first time his record was so bad they asked him not to return. He did and that time he lasted four years but didn't manage a degree. If the university is smart, it will give him an honorary one in a hurry for artistically he must already be one of its most gifted sons.
Any state should be joyous to be brought to life as McCarthy brings to life a part of Tennessee. It's something no state can buy, no industrial development commission or tourist bureau can create. It can only be achieved through a vast stroke of good fortune the conjunction of an area and a writer at least touched with genius. THE OVERRIDING presence in this novel is that of nature as it manifests itself in East Tennessee, notably in the hills. There is no mood, no aspect of nature, no evidence of the changing seasons, no sight, no smell, no sound, no movement that Cormac McCarthy has not looked at with the curiosity and the precise objectivity of the scientist and then put into words with the sense of beauty and the subjectivity of the natural poet.
Every aspect of nature In this novel is as old as nature THE ORCHARD KEEPER, by Cormac McCarthy (246 pages; Random House; $4.95). itself and as new as the unique perception of Cormac McCarthy. The reader who fails to look around outside of himself with a new eye and a new awareness after reading McCarthy, whether he be in Tennessee or North Dakota, or anywhere else, is already partly dead. A novel, of course, must deal with people and while McCarthys people are subordinated to their environment, are fragmented, they cant possibly bore you because by that very fragmentation McCarthy is . able to eliminate the dull spots from their lives and show them to us only at those moments when they are living with the most intensity, are most charged with emotion and with significance.
THE PRINCIPAL characters are a boy, a young man and an old man. The boy is mostly a child of nature with the right instincts among them awareness and a basic gentleness. The young man has taken to running whisky (this is the prohibition era) from a mountain top to Knoxville. He is basically an outlaw; he is also a stoic and as such is admirable in his way. The old man at first seems to be all the old and lonely men.
He lives by himself with an old hound dog, who at first seems to be all old hound dogs. Yet, somehow the old man and the old dog, for all their symbolic qualities, once you get to know them could never be mistaken for just any old man or just any old hound dog.
The old man dwells in a hill cabin near a pit where one day he discovers a body floating below in the brackish water. The body we know, but he doesn't, is that of the boy's father, murdered in self-defense by the young man and dumped into the pit. For seven years its moldering presence obsesses the old man. All that time the boy is waiting to do as his mother has told him he must avenge his father's death. The boy saves the young man from possible death and is in turn befriended by him.
But he does not know that the young man killed his father. THAT IS THE BASIC situation from which McCarthys story evolves. He does not tell it tidily. He does not even seem to tell it. Rather it seems to grow, like a living organism.
This is a novel full of intimations and implications as well as many forms of violence, none of it gratuitous. One of the intimations is that nature endures, man passes. Another is the existence of absolute and naked evil. Two obvious truths you may say. But there is nothing obvious about McCarthys intimations because there are many ways of telling the truth and McCarthys are all his own.
You almost tremble knowing that McCarthy is now working on two new novels. What a possibility for a great and much needed new voice in American fiction, one that can speak to the world and find a response everywhere. But suppose and then you think of Paton's and Kesey's subsequent novels suppose that this is McCarthys first and his last master work. It simply must not be!.

"A worm... got into my brain and ate a portion of it and then died." - RFK Jr. explaining an earlier case of mental fogginess and memory loss in a 2012 deposition.

Judge Naught

Disgraced former President Donald Trump is having a rough week in Manhattan court. He’s doing much better at subverting justice elsewhere.

• Trump lurched into the 2024 presidential campaign facing four felony cases over a mind-boggling range of alleged criminal activity. In response, he fired up his favorite tried-and-trusty legal strategy: delay. This week, it became clear that Trump’s big plan to throw sand in the gears of justice has worked all-too-well everywhere except in New York, aided by a mixture of corrupt or aligned jurists, including several he put on the bench himself.
  
• On Tuesday, U.S. District Judge Aileen Cannon (whom Trump appointed just days before the end of his presidency) delayed indefinitely Trump’s Florida case over charges of mishandling military secrets. Cannon’s excuse was that a trial just isn’t possible now given that her docket is so packed with complicated motions and issues to sort out. The truth is that Cannon engineered this backlog, and thus engineered the delay. She insisted on hearings for motions that other judges would process routinely; she created delay and controversy on questions that nobody raised; she ruled and then reversed herself, eating up precious time, after Special Counsel Jack Smith threatened to appeal her errors to the 11th Circuit. Cannon had only tried two criminal cases in her entire career before this case. She had never tried one involving highly classified documents. The delay she manufactured for Trump is the result of incompetence, or corruption, or both.
  
• Meanwhile, the Georgia Supreme Court agreed today to hear Trump’s appeal, creating a new delay in Trump’s Atlanta racketeering case. Trump is still trying to get Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis kicked off this massive election conspiracy case over allegations that her personal relationship with former prosecutor Nathan Wade was improper. In Georgia, Trump is charged as the head of a sprawling conspiracy to overturn the 2024 election. This trial was unlikely to happen before election day. Today’s announcement makes it all but impossible. That leaves Special Counsel Jack Smith’s Jan. 6 case, which is currently stalled while the Supreme Court weighs Trump’s immunity claims. There’s a chance the Justices could rule quickly and in a way that gets the trial back on track. But most experts think that’s unlikely.
  

These delays put the question of Trump’s accountability directly in the hands of voters. If he can’t scramble back into the White House, he’ll stand trial, eventually, like anyone else.

Look No Further Than Crooked Media

Special guest hosts were just announced for Lovett or Leave It LA! For those of you catching up, Jon Lovett’s taking a few weeks off to work on a project. While he’s out, Lovett or Leave It has lined up an absolutely bonkers lineup of guest hosts including Andy Richter, Larry Wilmore, Matt Rogers, Ian Karmel, Langston Kerman, and Guy Branum! Don't miss tomorrow's show with Andy Ritcher at the Lyric Hyperion. Get your tickets now at https://crooked.com/events!

Under The Radar

The Trump campaign has a zombie problem: It’s being chased around the country by the undead presidential candidacy of former South Carolina Governor Nikki Haley. Her campaign simply will not give up the ghost even though Haley bowed out of the race in March.
Last night in Indiana Haley bagged 22% of the vote, or more than 128,000 votes. Two weeks ago, Haley captured 17% of the GOP electorate in the Pennsylvania primary, or 160,000 votes. She pulled down similar numbers in Arizona.
It turns out there’s a pretty darn big group of Republican voters who are willing to drag themselves all the way across town to a primary voting booth to pull the lever for anyone but Trump, including for someone who’s not even running. These are moderates, women, and democracy-minded conservatives — including some who are watching their party’s presumptive nominee sit through a criminal trial over his hush money payments to a porn star and wondering how their party got into this mess (as we noted yesterday). The question becomes how many will return to Trumpworld by November — and how many are lost to him for good.

What Else?

President Biden told CNN the U.S. will stop sending weapons to Israel if the country launches a major assault on the southern Gaza city of Rafah. He also acknowledged that American weapons have been used to kill civilians.
The U.S. withheld a large arms shipment to Israel last week to signal concerns over a possible Rafah invasion, senior administration officials told NBC News. The Biden Administration also missed a deadline today for releasing a report on whether Israel is using U.S.-sourced arms in accordance with international law. State Department Spokesperson Matt Miller said the legally-required report to Congress should be completed by tomorrow.
Independent presidential candidate RFK Jr.’s campaign confirmed that a parasitic worm once got into his head, ate part of his brain and died there, resulting in memory loss and fogginess. The campaign, which has presented the 70-year-old Kennedy family scion as the younger and more-vigorous alternative to Biden or Trump, insists he’s feeling fine now. And yet… we have so many questions.
Amazon turned off the torrent of negative online reviews for South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem’s book, the notorious tome in which Noem boasts about shooting her dog and tells a bogus story about staring down North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un. But don’t worry, you can still write reviews on Noem’s forthcoming follow-up book, “Saving America from Wokeness Through Dog Murder.”
Meanwhile, Noem, whose book is called “No Going Back,” may finally be backing down from days of insisting that shooting the family dog is simply what strong leaders do. She ditched a planned appearance with Fox’s Greg Guttfeld on Tuesday night. Man, you know it’s bad when you’re a Republican afraid that Fox News will ask you the tough questions.
Marge did it! Rep. After days of talks seeking concessions from Speaker Mike Johnson, Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) surprised everyone by triggering her long-threatened motion to oust Johnson from the chair. Republicans quickly moved to kill the motion, but eleven of them voted against Johnson, which means there would have been enough votes to oust YET ANOTHER GOP speaker had Democrats not come to Johnson’s rescue.

What A Sponsor

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Happy reading!

Light At The End Of The Email

The Biden Administration announced a huge, new, job-creating Microsoft plant in Wisconsin… on the very same land where Trump announced a Foxconn plant that never happened.
Violent crime is way down across America, including mass shootings. There have been 29% fewer mass shootings this year, with 91 fewer deaths and 220 fewer injuries.

Enjoy

J. Profound on Twitter: "If I was a detective I’d probably be like “come on tellllll meeeee “"

Sharing an article last updated at 10:00 am on Tuesday May 7th. By Ellie Roth and Dana Ferguson at MPR News. Article link: https://www.mprnews.org/story/2024/05/07/a-year-after-minnesota-became-a-trans-refuge-transplants-make-themselves-at-home
When bills to ban gender-affirming care for youth and adults were introduced in Texas last summer, Charley and his partner knew it was time to leave.
His move to Minnesota didn’t feel like moving in the traditional sense. It felt like fleeing.
“It was pretty clear that if that didn’t pass something else would,” said Charley, who is transgender. “We just needed to get out.”
Even the mere introduction of legislation caused some medical providers in Texas to preemptively cease offering care.
MPR News agreed to identify Charley by first name only because he works as a graduate student at a university in Texas and fears possible workplace repercussions while completing his studies.
The couple put a list together of all the states that had passed protections for LGBTQ+ people. Then they looked at each state’s cost of living and different employment opportunities. Minnesota came out on top.
Just over a year ago, Minnesota became a legal refuge for transgender people after the Legislature passed a law cementing protections for trans people and those who offer gender-affirming care.
The move was aimed at countering efforts by dozens of conservative-led states that restricted access to care or banned it all together.
KFF, an independent health care policy tracking organization, reports that 24 states have limited access to the services for minors and 22 impose penalties for physicians that provide it. In the Midwest, Minnesota became an island for gender-affirming care. Iowa, North Dakota and South Dakota have enacted bans on care for youth.
The bans have spurred people like Charley to uproot their lives and move to Minnesota. And he’s not alone.
Between July 2023 and March 2024, the pro-LGBTQ+ group called PFund said 231 people filled out a survey indicating that they have moved or are in the process of moving to Minnesota. But PFund notes that the number is likely higher.
Executive Director Aaron Zimmerman said it’s not easy to gather data at a large scale in this space. Some families and people moving to Minnesota for care might not need resources, ask for community support or seek out PFund as a resource.
Democrats who put forward and passed the legal changes in St. Paul said the numbers show the law has worked in bringing more people to Minnesota. But now, they say, the state needs to do more to offer communities for those who make the move.
Conservatives, meanwhile, said the step went too far and has tarnished the state’s reputation.

Demand for services grows

This increase in trans people and families in the state has caused a strain on the healthcare system and the providers that treat them. Children’s Minnesota saw a 30 percent increase in calls to the Gender Health Program in early 2023 as surrounding states began to ban gender-affirming care.
Before the Trans Refuge Law was passed, the waiting list for the Gender Health Program was over a year long. Dr. Kade Goepferd, the program’s executive director, has only watched it grow.
“Our arms are already incredibly full,” Goepferd said earlier this year. “Our team at Children’s Minnesota and our colleagues in the Twin Cities who specialize in this essential health care are outmatched by the demand.”
Children’s Minnesota has hired two new clinicians as a part of the Gender Health Program to keep up with demand. The clinic now has six, three physicians and three mental health professionals. While interviewing candidates, at least half of the candidates were medical or mental health professionals looking to relocate to Minnesota from states where gender-affirming care bans for youth were in place.
“With essential health care for trans and gender diverse kids, nothing's new,” Goepferd said. “We’ve been providing this care for decades, we’ve been using the same medications for decades, we’ve been following international guidelines that are now in their eighth revision and initially came out in the ‘70s. So this is not new care. The only thing that’s new about it is the controversy.”
Goepferd said misinformation surrounding gender-affirming care has been harmful and confusing for families with transgender youth. Transgender youth who are the targets of violence or harassment experience a negative impact on their mental health. The current political landscape has also made it more difficult for doctors like Goepfered to do their jobs.
“These are kids and families that are coming to us experiencing trauma,” Goepferd said. “We as a health care team are also experiencing trauma because we are personally targeted at times … we are a healthcare team that’s under stress, treating patients and families that are under stress and trauma.”
Gopeferd said the hope is that state lawmakers will pass funding to provide more resources for physicians and providers delivering care to transgender youth and adults.

‘Minnesota Transplants’ takes off

As Charley’s moving truck pulled up to his new home in St. Louis Park last August, he felt instant relief.
“It was really good to pull the Penske up into our neighborhood and already see the progress flags. That’s not something that I saw a lot in Texas, at least not in a suburban area,” he said. “Then just the feeling that winter was coming and the temperature was dropping. I got really excited because it was confirmation that I wasn’t in Texas anymore.”
His second emotion that would plague the next few months in his new home: loneliness.
“It felt like my partner and I were on our own little island,” Charley said. “There’s this whole community around us that we just sort of crash landed into, which was a really weird feeling.”
He began looking on local social media pages to try and find a social group to join. But there wasn’t a group in the Twin Cities dedicated to trans individuals who had moved to Minnesota.
So in January, Charley made his own. The Twin Cities Queer Transplants group offers a social network for new Minnesotans who are fleeing states that banned gender-affirming care — members of the group help each other move into their new homes and organize outings to explore their new city.
In four months, the group has grown to 40 members. They come from all over the country — many from Texas and Florida, Iowa and Wisconsin, even some from Alaska.
“Part of the goal of the group is to get people some kind of social life when they get here,” he said. “The shared understanding that we all have to be there for each other has been overwhelming, in a positive way.”

A new Capitol push

Rep. Leigh Finke, DFL-St. Paul, is the first openly trans lawmaker in the Minnesota Legislature and drove the trans refuge bill in the 2023 session. She is proud of the strides taken last year.
“So what we have done in Minnesota to make moves towards protection has really resounded,” Finke said. “Many people have come, organizations have built coalition’s around how we are going to support the community that’s already here, and the community that’s coming.”
But, Finke said, lawmakers have work left to do this year.
She said lawmakers should approve grant funding to help LGBTQ+ people and gender care providers relocate to Minnesota, along with other policy changes.
She’s also backing a constitutional equal rights amendment that guarantees access to gender affirming care and a bill that would mandate that insurance companies cover the cost, as well as a bill that would prohibit school boards or local governments from banning the display of rainbow flags.
“We can’t just pass the trans refuge bill and then think that we’re done,” Finke said. “We need to expand health care options, we need to make our schools safer, we need to do so much work to protect those people.”
While DFL majorities at the Capitol have advanced those proposals, they could be stymied by the arrest of Sen. Nicole Mitchell. Democrats hold a one-vote lead in the Senate and the policies could stall out if she resigns or is somehow barred from voting.
Conservative groups and Republicans at the Capitol have raised concerns about the policy change and the efforts to brand Minnesota a destination state for gender-affirming care.
“Forcing all insurers to pay for this is misguided and forcing all taxpayers to pay for so-called gender-affirming care is coercion,” said Rebecca Delahunt of Minnesota Family Council. “Children cannot give informed consent on treatment that alters or potentially changes their reproductive health.”
GOP lawmakers said they worry about how people elsewhere would perceive Minnesota after passing the trans refuge law and protections for those seeking abortions.
“I’m very saddened by what has been going on in our state Legislature here as of late turning Minnesota into a destination state for death or mutilation,” Rep. Matt Grossell, R-Clearbrook, said. “That is not the that is not the kind of reputation you want.”
While those comments or concerns permeate the national dialogue around gender-affirming care for transgender and gender diverse people, they don’t square with reality, physicians said.
Major medical associations support gender-affirming care and note it improves mental health outcomes in the short and long term. Providers also note that only in rare instances do transgender people under age 18 qualify for surgical treatments.

Settled in

Charley has lived in Minnesota for less than a year, but he already knows he wants to stay.
“This is a wonderful place to live. I’ve never felt like I could be more myself,” Charley said.
Charley has been talking with people across the country who want to form Transplants chapters in other states that have enacted laws similar to Minnesota’s trans refuge law. He wants to help create a blueprint for new chapters.
Colorado, Illinois, Maryland and New Mexico have all passed bills designed to shield transgender health care through legal protections, health care coverage and access.
He hopes one day there will be enough resources available for transgender people moving to Minnesota that the Transplants group does not have to exist.
Until then, he said the Transplants group will be ready to welcome them with open arms.
Correction (May 7, 2024): In an earlier version of this story, we misidentified Dr. Goepferd’s name. The story has been corrected.

WWW Friday Night Flame (May 3. 2024) (Wembley Stadium, London)
Becky Lynch vs Isla Dawn- tournament
To kick off the show is Becky Lynch vs Isla Dawn in the women’s championship quarterfinals.
Becky Lynch locks up with Isla Dawn and dominates early in the match starting to work on Isla’s arm hitting arm drags, arm kicks, etc for like 10 minutes . Becky gets Isla Dawn goes up top and looks for a Leg drop but Isla capitalizes and hits a 619 leg sweep off the top causing Becky to land on the back of her neck. Isla goes for the pin after that hard impact 1…2. Becky kicks out. Isla sits Becky up and measures her for a rear European uppercut right to the back of the neck. Isla continues assault kicking and punching her on the ground. She sits her up again and hits her with a Penalty Kick for the cover again 1..2 kick out again. Isla picks her up with a wrist lock and hits the wristlock suplex before trying to go for it again but Becky catches it and hits her with a suplex getting some time to recuperate. Becky gets back up and lays Isla out with strikes and kicks and targeting the arm again she picks her up and hits a wristlock suplex of her own before locking in the Disarm her causing Isla to eventually tap out.
Roman Reigns is interviewed backstage and says “I’m going to win the whole tournament and I am gonna prove why I am the tribal chief and I will be the tribal chief of the United Kingdom” he leaves
Adam Page vs Eric Young- tourney first round
When the bell rings, the maniac Eric Young goes right after Adam page and starts pounding on him in the corner with shoulder thrusts and punches over and over again before Adam page throws him in the corner and starts clotheslining him before Irish whipping him to the other corner and hitting a shoulder thrust before putting on the top rope. But Eric grabs him and hangman dragon sleepers him from the turnbuckle trying to choke out Adam before letting go and hitting a diving moonsault but Adam catches him and hits him a fallaway slam for the cover 1..2 kick out by Eric. Adam page doesn’t waste time picking him back up hits jab after jab before hitting a discus elbow causing him to Fall into the ropes bouncing Eric back Eric hits a Superkick but Adam bounces off and hit a Superkick of his own making Eric bouncing off the ropes again he hit a swinging neck breaker falling on top of the cover 1…2… Adam page kicks out. Both are tired laying on the ground. They eventually get back up and start trading blows again back and forth before Adam page hits a huge big boot knocking him down in the corner. Adam page line Eric up and hits him with a running low drop kick right to the face. Adam page goes to the top moonsault 1…2… kick out by Eric. They continue trading momentum for another 5 minutes before Eric young sets up for a Death Valley driver… Adam page grabs onto the ropes and ends up pulling his way to the apron and elbows Eric out of his way and hits rhe BUCKSHOT LARIAT FLIPPING ERIC INSIDE OUT 1…2…3 ADAM PAGE WINS!
MCMG vs Acclaimed- tag quarterfinals
The bell rings. Alex Shelley and Anthony Bowens shake hands to start the match. Having a good 5 minute of grappling going back and forth before Alex Shelley tags in Sabin. Sabin immediately springboards into the ring ducks under bowens and hits a springboard arm drag on bowens running back at him for a hurricarana into the acclaimed’s corner. Max tags in and they start trading blows back and forth for a couple minutes before max caster takes out Shelley too and tags bowens back and bowens tags caster back. bowens hits the arrival followed by the mic drop by Caster. 1…..2…. SHELLEY BREAKs it up. Shelley start fighting back and caster and bowens, taking bowens out of the ring but caster throws Shelley in the corner and start punching him in the corner. Shelley fights back and gets caster in the corner before Sabin gets back up and hits a running hesitation elbow on caster… Sabin drags caster to his side of the ring and tags in Shelley. Sabin picks caster backwards on the top turnbuckle, and they hit the MADE IN DETROIT 1…2…3
MCMG are going to the semifinals
Damage CTRL comes out and talks about their time in WWE and says that it’s time for them to run WWW.
Dakota Kai grabs a mic and says, “I’ve been leader of Damage CTRL for a little while and it’s time for me to prove myself here in the United Kingdom, just like I proved myself in the States, I don’t care what you people think but I want to show why I am the future of women’s wrestling period. I will prove why I am the future of WWW.” Dakota drops the mic with damage CTRL cheering on kota.
Leon Slater vs Michael Oku- tournament first round
The bell rings and they go back and forth for a good while. Trading strikes, grapples, reversals, eventually Leon gets the upper hand and hits a beautiful drop kick on Oku. Leon slater then goes for a springboard Moonsault but Oku moves and Slater lands on his feet and gets caught with a Superkick causing him to bounce off the rope, Oku ducks under him and hits him with a knee to the face and goes up top for a frog splash 8 minutes into the match’. But Slater reverses… and handsprings off the ropes and hits a back elbow before quickly climbing the top looking for a 450 Swanton Bomb but Oku catches his legs and locks in the Half crab causing slater to tap out
Charlotte Flair vs Kay Lee Ray- tournament
They both are ready to win. Alba Fyre is being cheered loudly which throws Charlotte off her game which allows alba fyre to charge Charlotte flair immediately getting her in the corner and throwing punches and kicks until the ref breaks them up Lee Ray looks for a running attack in the corner but s flair side steps and hits a huge chop across the chest of Kay. She chops her a couple more times causing her to fall to the ground. She starts targeting Kay’s leg stomping it, stretching it and just pounding it against the mat. She looks to lock in the figure 4 early but Kay kicks her knee and gets out of it and starts pounding on Charlotte, and stomping on Charlotte’s leg. Trying to hurt the leg so she can’t lock in the figure 4. She continues assaults the leg. Locking her in a leg lock. Till Charlotte gets to the rope. Kay then hits a nice kick to the chest before kicking her chest again and again until Charlotte collapses. Kay goes on the top rope. Swanton bomb? No Charlotte rolls over near the ropes and runs Kay Lee while she’s trying to get up and hits a Natural Selection. 1…2… NO KLR KICKS OUT. Charlotte is shocked and looks to lock in the figure 4 holding it trying to the figure 8 but her legs give out and KLR gets the chance to roll up Charlotte 1…2… CHARLOTTE KICKS OUT KLR gets back up but Charlotte runs at her for the big boot but KLR ducks and gets hit with a huge Superkick. Stunning Charlotte, she gets picked up and hit with the KLR BOMB 1…2…3
KAY LEE RAY ADVANCES!
Sheamus comes out and says “I know that I am in the world title tournament, but I still want to win the trios championship with my two favorite fellas, Pete Dunne & Ridge Holland. Gallus comes out and mocks Sheamus saying. “You had just returned to wrestling less then a week ago and that you aren’t even looking the best he has at his worse, you look like you sat at home all day and did nothing. And that is why we will be the one to win the trios championships”. GOD Comes out and interrupts and Tama says, “We’ve been without gold for a while and that it’s our time to win the gold. And we prove everyone why we are the best trio in the whole damn world.” Sanity comes out to a huge pop for Killian Dain and Eric young say “when I we wrestling in the states there was never a trios title where they came from and that if we did then would’ve won it then and now we’re gonna win them now!” The Undisputed Era come out and Roderick Strong says “Eric, stop acting like you guys are all that, we’ve beaten you multiple times, you guys don’t deserve shit and if anyone deserves the trio championship Its the Undisputed Er—- LWO comes out and Dragon Lee says “Rod, Roddy, shut your mouth, you don’t deserve shit. The LWO has worked their ass off everywhere and WE will be the first ever WWW trios champion.” UNITED Empire’s TJP, Francesco Akira & Henare come out. TJP Says “you guys are working really must be working your ass off considering you guys can’t even win a match: if anyone had worked their ass off it is the United empire who’s been winning titles all over the world”OTM comes out and Scrypt says “we have been slowly evolving and proving our self, so that’s why want to be the trios champions.” Team Filthy comes out and Tom lawlor says “that We have been working more than anyone and said they deserve titles more than anyone in the whole wrestling industry”’There all in the ring as tensions rise but then you here the intro of the bullet club war dogs… David Finlay, Gabe Kidd and Chase Owens come out to a big pop and Finlay says, “We came here with a purpose and that is it dominate world wide just like every other Bullet Club has.” David Finlay then out of nowhere hits Tom Lawlor with the Prima in the face and brawl breaks out til security breaks all 24 men up. Ely comes out and reveals a Trios Gauntlet match for the inaugural WWW Trios Championship at the first ever WWW PPV…. NEW EMPIRE!
Aussie Open vs Kingdom- tag team quarterfinals
Fletcher & Taven start off with grappling and strikes. But none can get the upper hand til Taven goes for a suplex that’s reversed by Fletcher and Fletcher chops Taven in the back of the neck then goes for a back suplex for a quick cover. They continue going back and forth not letting either team get a tag. This goes on for about ten minutes but Fletcher gets the tag to mark David and he starts hitting Taven with hard strikes repeatedly going back and forth before eventually tagging Fletcher back in and they hit Taven with the coriolis followed by Fletcher super kicking Bennett off the apron Fletcher goes for the cover 1…2…3
Shibata vs Roman Reigns- tournament first round
As soon as the bell rings. Shibata looks to lock up with Roman but Roman just kicks Shibata in the gut. Roman start punching him in the gut and kicking him into the corner looking for clothesline after clothesline the. Roman runs to the other corner but Shibata hits him with a corner big boot. Roman collapses from the impact. I don’t think Roman has ever been hit so hard. Shibata continues kicking Roman in the chest once he starts getting up. Roman catches one of the kicks and picks him up for a powerbomb taking Shibata down leaving room for air. Roman goes to the corner looking to finish the match earlier SUPERMAN PUNCH… 1…2… Shibata kicks out: Roman goes in the corner again… OOOOOO AHHHHH. Roman charges for the spear. Shibata catches him on his shoulder Death Valley driver. 1….2…. Kick out by Roman. Shibata grabs Roman’s arm and tries to knock him out with the hammer and anvil elbows but Roman ends up getting out of turns it around hitting Shibata with elbows to the side of the head before locking in the guillotine. Shibata seems to be out… 1… 2… SHIBATA’s arm gets lifted and he grabs onto the rope. Roman is pissed calling for the spear again but Shibata intercepts with the iron octopus, Roman’s shoulders are down 1…2… Roman’s feet are on the rope. Shibata lets go and immediately runs to the ropes and looks for the PK but Roman ducks it and goes to the ropes running speed SPEARRRR…. 1….2….3 ROMAN ADVANCES IN THE TOURNAMENT
Lyra Valkyria vs Nikki Cross- tournament quarterfinals
Before the bell rings the crowd are half and half in cheer. 1 Irish women and 1 Scottish women. The bell rings and the crowd gets even louder, Nikki & Lyra just soak it in for a minute but Nikki locks in and hits her with a clotheslines followed by a drop kick and rushes Lyra in the corner for repeated corner battering rams… but the referee makes her stop. Nikki goes for a running splash but Lyra ducks and starts throwing strikes, punches and kicks. Lyra puts Nikki on the top rope and picks her and hits the SUPERPLEX 1…2 Nikki kicks out. Lyra fights back for a while both getting offense in at the end but lyra connects a huge roundhouse kick knocking Nikki down almost out but Lyra climbs up the top and hits the frog splash 1…2…3 LYRA WINS
Sheamus vs Bandido- tournament first round
This match is a clash between Brawling vs high flying. Sheamus tries to start with a lock up but Bandido knows he’s not stronger than Sheamus and tries to out run and out wrestle around Sheamus but Sheamus catches up and catches him into a powerslam Sheamus angry starts to pound and kick on Bandido. Sheamus tries to finish things early and puts Bandido on the top rope and looks to hit a white noise but Bandido reverses it into a crucifix off the top for the cover 1..2. Kick out by Sheamus and the match continues back and forth for a while longer… Bandido gets the upper hand goes for a springboard but Sheamus catches him with a huge knee taking Bandido down and out Sheamus picks him back up and hits him with the Irish Curse followed by a brogue kick for the win 1…2…3 Sheamus advances to a huge pop by the crowd
David Finlay vs Rey Mysterio- Tournament First Round
David Finlay starts the match with strikes and grapples trying to keep mysterio down for most of the match. David Finlay is dominating but midway through the match Rey uses his speed and agility to get ahead in the game and eventually hit a 619 followed by a frog splash for a 2. The match continues back and forth both men getting the upper hand through out the match. Rey gets the upper hand David Finlay looks for a Brain buster that is reversed into a ddt stunning David in the middle ropes he looks for the 619 but David catches his legs and swoops him into the ring picks him up and hits the OVERKILL that knocks Rey into the corner. Rey gets picked up by David again and hit with the Trash Panda brain buster for the 1..2..3 David Finlay advances
After the match, The Bullet Club Wardogs help David Finlay jump Rey mysterio sending a message to LWO looking to hit their finishers before LWO come out as BC Wardogs run off
Zack Sabre Jr vs Adam Cole- Tournament First Round
The bell rings the fans cheering loudly for Zack Sabre Jr. Sabre immediately grapples Adam to the ground and mocks Adam before Adam gets back up just to get grappled down again by Zack. Adam starts getting back up and gets out of the grapple and starts throwing strikes at Zack punches, kicks, elbows, and knees. Cole picks Sabre up and hits him with a brain buster for the cover only for a 2 count. Cole then starts getting aggressive and ground and pounds Sabre but Sabre turns it around a puts him in an arm bar but Cole is trying to get out so he transitions to a different submission and continues til Cole gets back up and hits Sabre with a picture perfect superkick knocking Sabre down to a knee and Cole goes for another superkick and goes for the cover but Sabre kicks out again. Adam Cole goes the corner on the middle rope for the Panama sunrise but Sabre trips Cole off the top rope and causes him to bang his head against the top turnbuckle on the way to the mat. Sabre knows Cole is hurt and targets the head of Cole with kicks, submissions and elbows to the head before locking in the Selected Technical Works V2. Cole tries to fight out of it but Cole ends up passing out to the choke. Zack Sabre jr advances to next week
Bryan Danielson vs LA Knight- tournament First round
The bell rings and the fans are neutral but excited for the match. LA Knight and Bryan danielson immediately lock up with La knight getting the upper hand and throwing Bryan into the corner taunting Bryan they lock up again but Knight just tosses him in the corner. Danielson is getting pissed looks to lock up but kicks Knight in the left knee. Danielson starts laying punches and elbows on the back of Knight before kicking him in the chest over and over again with the Yes kicks followed by a roundhouse kicked but La knight reverses it rolls up danielson 1..2 kick out but danielson but Knight then kicks Danielson in the chest repeatedly mocking him but Danielson catches one and trips him and stomps on his knee repeatedly. Locks in a knee lock but Knight gets lying the ropes and breaks it up. The referee forces danielson off. Knight gets back to his feet and slaps him hard knocking him down to a knee and La knight hits a ddt for the cover 1…2. Kick out out by danielson. La knight then picks danielson back up and continues the fight before danielson gets the upper hand and goes to the corner and hits running kicks back to back in the corner to La knight he picks LA Knight onto the top rope and hits him with an Avalanche Hurricarana for the cover 1…2… La knight kicks out. Danielson calls La knight up but kicks him in the chest. Kicks him again and again 9 times but La knight is getting hyped and gets up to his feet and Danielson looks for a round house kick but knight ducks and hits a jab “YEAH”. Another jab. “yeah”. Another jab. YEAH! And 2 more “YEAH!” Before bouncing danielson off the rope hitting the sky lord slam followed by a running elbow drop for the cover 1…2… no DANIELSON KICKS OUT. Charlie Dempsey comes out and the ref gets distracted LA Knight looks for the BFT but stops for a second . Danielson goes in the corner fans booing loudly as danielson stalks knight and hits the Busaiku knee on La knight for the cover 1…2…3 Bryan Danielson wins.
Claudio castagnoli comes out and celebrates with danielson and says, “I promise that either me or Charlie will become the first ever European championship.” He drops the mic and looks to Leave but then…. THE FANS POP LOUDLY THINKING IT’S FINN BALOR BUT OUT OF NOWHERE DOMINIK MYSTERIO AND JD McDonagh Come out and jump Claudio and Charlie and JD McDonagh says, “We want the European championship and we have challenge, me & my boy Dominik mysterio vs Claudio Castagnoli & Charlie Dempsey and if we win. We will be added to the European Championship match”. and challenge them to a tag match next week on Friday nights flames where if they win they get a chance to be in the European championship match
Will Ospreay vs PAC- Tournament first round
2 of the greatest high flyers in UK History fighting for a chance to continue on in the WWW WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP TOURNAMENT.
The bell rings and they go back and forth with strikes and grapples, reversal after reverse counter wrestling for the first 8 minutes of the match. PAC the upper hand when Ospreay reversed a powerbomb into a Frankensteiner keeping Ospreay down. PAC then picks up Ospreay and continuously hits forearms on Ospreay before going for a springboard that Ospreay ducks and pac lands on his feet getting met with a huge strike before getting hit with another but pac fights back and hits a sole kick to the gut, another kick to the head and then another sole kick pack ones of the rope but Ospreay jumps over pac and then does a backflip off his chest and hits him with a Super kick. Ospreay runs off the other side of the rope but pac sidesteps Ospreay and hits a slingshot German suplex. Ospreay gets to his feet and hit a OSCUTTER both men are down and out. Referee counts for the 10 but they both get back up at the same time and pac and Ospreay go back and forth again but pac catches him with a nice kick knocking him to the corner. PAC runs into the corner at Ospreay with a corner forearm smash and sets him on the top and turns him around looking to hit a avalanche poison rana on Ospreay he hits it but Ospreay lands directly on his feet staring at PAC before running at him immediately with a HIDDEN BLADE DUCKED and pac locks him into the Brutalizer on Ospreay. Ospreay looks like he’s going to tap but Ospreay rolls over on his back, PAC’s shoulders are down 1…2… pac gets out and Ospreay gets catch with a standing shoot star. Pac goes to the middle rope phoenix splash. PAC goes up top again….. RED ARROW-NO OSPREAY ROLLS UP AND PICKS HIM UP FOR THE STORMBREAKER BEFORE GOING TO THE CORNER AND LINES PAC UP AND HITS HIM WITH A HIDDEN BLADE but doesn’t stop that and goes for it again and connects with it again 1…2…3
OSPREAY WINS TO A LOUD POP. He celebrates with the united empire but Callum Newman decides to rub salt in the wound and just kicks the side of the head of pac. To end the show.

Back in 1992 my brother Boone went missing. Our family had always lived in North Dakota, but Boone had always dreamed of leaving.
In 1990, Boone was accepted to the University of Miami in South Florida. His freshman year he met a couple good friends and they all moved into a little beach bungalow their first summer. He had been living there since.
In late August of 1992, Boone called home and I answered. It was around 1am and he sounded frantic. He said the hurricane that was about to hit was going to be bad, and that he was leaving to come home. He said something was wrong, that he could feel it building around him in the air. I told him the plan. I told him to meet me at the first Greyhound Bus station past the Florida-Georgia border and we could drive back home together. I wanted to make sure he was safe because he was really scaring me.
Boone said he would call home again as soon as he got to the bus station. I told him I would already be en-route, so just let Mom know he was safe and waiting for me.
I packed a small bag and cash, left my Mom a note, and biked to the bus station.
I was really freaked out. Though my brother was a dreamer and creative, he wasn’t one to panic or really to fright easily. I got on the bus and took note of the only people there immediately. Only four others, two pairs of male and female companions. The closer pair was to the right, in the first row behind the driver. The woman looked frightened. The man looked as if he was trying to keep his demeanor calm.
The other couple was even more strange. They sat towards the back on the left side. The man was sleeping against the window. But the woman had giant dark eyes, they were glassy and shiny, she looked as if I had just interrupted her crying over a funeral wake. Her mouth was open though, slack-jawed, and I could see too many teeth. She would not take her eyes off me. I could almost feel them poking the back of my head as I sat down two rows behind the first couple.
The bus took off and I tried to think of anything but my brother and the strange lady staring at me. I pulled out a book and started to read.
I didn’t hear the first plinking sounds until we were in South Dakota- a few hours later. It was faint over the background noise, but it was distinct on the plastic floor. Plink. Plink. Plink.
As day broke and we took our first stop, I decided to get off to buy a couple snacks and relieve myself in the bathroom. I didn’t turn around when I stood up, just exited. When I returned to the bus I took a deep breath and stepped on, hoping the woman had fallen asleep or better yet, gotten off.
No. Instead her companion seemed to have disappeared, as well as the other couple. It seemed as though the woman hadn’t even moved. But she just stared at me.
I took my spot where the other couple had been sitting before and tried to forget she was still on the bus. Plink. Plink. Plink. Plink. Plink. The noise seemed to go on for hours. Like an irregular, leaky faucet, dripping pebbles onto linoleum.
When we reached Tennessee, she got off the bus. But as she passed me, she touched my shoulder and said “Not yet.” I couldn’t bring myself to even glance at her, I was trying not to shake out of my skin. Her voice was so hollow and raspy like it belonged to a broken drive-thru speaker. She smiled and exited, I thought she might break her neck to continue staring at me as she left.
As soon as the bus lurched forward, I got up and went to where the woman had been sitting, staring. I looked down and saw a pile of human and animal teeth. The man who I had thought left the bus previously, was slumped in the seat, almost falling forward to the floor. When we got to the next station the bus driver called the police and I was transferred to a new bus. The whole situation was really unsettling to me.
When I got to the final Greyhound station in Georgia, I looked around for my brother. His car wasn’t there and I didn’t see him anywhere. I called home at the pay phone and Mom answered. I asked if Boone had called and she said he hadn’t. So I waited.
I waited a full day at the station. He never showed. I called home again and Mom still hadn’t gotten a phone call either. I called Boone’s house. The line just rang, and rang, and rang. I broke down crying on the bench.
I got back home and Mom told me some of the news she had seen. Hurricane Andrew had swept through South Florida and ravaged the state. There were deaths and many reported missing. My Mom called the school when it reopened for classes to see if Boone had shown up, to which they told us no. We called the police and filed a missing persons report.
My Mom and I went down to Florida together the next week to help in searching for Boone and the others including his roommates. We never found anyone, or Boone.
We still don’t know what happened to him to this day. His car was never seen. And because his roommates were missing too, we could never figure out where he last was. In fact most of their home had been destroyed, and most of Boone’s personal items were either swept away, or he had taken with him.
Since then I have suffered with debilitating nightmares that make sleep basically impossible. I have flashbacks to seeing the woman on the bus. The dead man. Boone. The destruction of the hurricane. It just comes back and hits me whenever I’m awake. I spent the first year after Boone went missing in bed. Hardly eating. Catatonic. But as time marched on, the images and nightmares slowly - and I mean slowly - started to fade and I could begin to recall the better times I had shared with Boone.
Today, I visited the headstone my Mom had made last year, in honor of Boone. It was early evening. I remember as I walked up to his headstone, I could see a stack of something on it that wasn’t there before. As I got near, I pushed aside the flowers and I noticed it was a pile of teeth. When I examined further I noticed animal teeth as well.
I stood up, and the woman from the bus, more than 30 years ago, was standing in front of me. She was exactly as I remembered from all my nightmares. All she said was, “Soon.”

I have a death certificate from 1910 North Dakota. It is a child death and the cause is a big white square that had purposefully been placed. The child was 8 at the time of death and his newspaper obit is very short and asks for no flowers to be sent. I find it a bit odd. Why would the cause of death be blocked?

Dakotas untimely death is being investigated. Speculation has grown that the foster mother sat on top of him until he could no longer breathe.

It's been a little over two months since I sobered up again. I moved across the country on a whim. Left behind what could have been a good life. I was working with special needs adults. They were the best part of my day and I miss them more and more as time goes on. But what I wasn't addressing back home is what fucked my life over. Our city got hit by gentrification. The housing prices just keep on going up and up and up. After three years the only apartment that I could find was a piece of shit studio near the day-time-homeless-shelter aka two parks. The homeless people who are too fucked up for the shelters sleep at the parks. In a short period of time I saw plenty.
When I first started working, there was a missing sign everywhere around the city. It wasn't long after moving in that they found the guy's body. He was fished out of the drainage system in the park. Apparently the homeless people hide in there during the big winter storms, he had been in there for at least four months.
Back to back bodies - one guy got stomped to death in the alley behind the apartment and the next day a guy got stabbed to death across the street in the park.
One day I got home after work at eleven PM and saw four guys beating the fuck out of one guy. When my headlights shined on 'em the guy getting his ass kicked had his hand held out like a Romero zombie crawling out of the grave, right before getting his head soccer kicked.
How stupid was I to think that I could open my window at 1am during the early summer months. How fucking pompous of me, to think I could enjoy my own apartment and the summer breeze on an other wise hot, humid night. From 1am to 4am there was a drunk outside that did the two-finger whistle up at the apartment building. The only thing that stopped him was the heavy thunderstorm that rolled in.
Three years and this was all I could afford, the only place that would rent to me.
One day I walked up the stairs and as soon as my nose crested the hallway floor I was overwhelmed by the smell of rotting fish and garlic. It was like that for two days. Day three I called the landlord and told her that I think there might be a dead person in the building. She assured me that she had seen everyone that week so it most likely wasn't a body. It was probably the weird meth head down the hall who has a hygiene issue.
Our city has a high Native population and in my three years I've seen maybe one homeless White person.
I'm Native myself. Our city had one of the only urban Native healthcare centers in the state. We are medical refugees. We go where we can get medication and appointments. The government and our tribes have seen to it that we stay in very specific places, with very few options in actual cities. If we want ER services, blood pressure medication and the like, then we better stay where we've always been. In the isolated, miserable and forgotten communities that we belong in.
There is no help for someone who wants to leave a community that has been scarred completely by generations of addiction. There is no help for anyone who wants to start over. Unless we go through the military, the academic path, or through the prison system, then we should expect no help. We are in towns with an unemployment rate of nearly 85 percent. We aren't supposed to leave. We are supposed to create more Natives so our tribes can stay relevant. We are supposed to live the same lives that our parents and grandparents have lived for at least a century.
The city is for single moms.
Housing is for single moms, the elderly, and the disabled. The city helps those that matter the most. If we should foolishly dream of escaping a poverty stricken hellhole, if we should feel the call to start over and become functioning members of society, then we will have to do it without any help.
We should expect help with housing to come in maybe three to five years if we're lucky. If not, well, get fucked, savage. Go back home. No one wants you here. This is a great new city. The new stealth bombers are coming to the airforce base soon. We're not going to build affordable housing for you or your kind. We have a finite pool and that's it. The apartments that are going up will be available for the college students and the military members, at a very reasonable 1500-2500 depending on the amount of rooms.
What's that?
You don't have credit?
Your tribe can only employ 20 percent of you?
Well that's not our problem. If you want to live here you need to earn three times rent, and have good credit.
I understand that this is the only place that offers healthcare for you and your kind, but we don't care one bit about you or your formerly sacred lands. We care about the tech industry, we care about the billionaires that use South Dakota's tax loopholes, we care about Black Rock and the other real estate companies, we care about the transplants from California that will willingly buy your houses so they can rent them out on Airbnb. You and your kind belong on the reservation. You should be connected to a liquid IV of hundred proof vodka, you should be losing weight by indulging in glass. Not out here, among decent folk.
How foolish of you, to think that you would be able to live in the real world. Your world is out there on the prairie with your horses and tipis, on land that you haven't owned in nearly a century. You belong on the grasslands in the 1800's, not in modernity.
What's that?
The ranchers bought the land and you have nowhere to go but your isolated and scattered housing projects?
Too fucking bad.
Come back when you make 4500 a month and have great credit.
I made money back painting. I painted enough to move. I made enough sales to live in hotels, motels, shacks, cabins, and whenever that wouldn't work, I froze ass in my car for weeks on end.
Eventually I got jobs loading mail trucks at UPS and then at Fedex.
And out of nowhere, I got this weird thought, maybe apply for a different job. Maybe they'll actually hire you. Maybe you deserve a real income and an actual place. So that's what I did. And then...
So I drove a bus with the special needs adults and made a modest amount of money. At work life was great. I was invested in them. I wanted to hear about their lives. I stopped saying stuff that I said my whole life. I stopped calling pedestrian things "crazy" because I worked with people who had mental health issues or traumatic brain injuries. I had phased out the word "retard" a long time ago, but being around a vulnerable population that got mercilessly bullied their whole lives with words like that cemented the notion of never using a word that painful again.
I had health insurance, dental and vision insurance. I was working for a great company for the first time in my entire life. I went through training, certified for CPR, learned how to drive a bus, learned how to operate a wheelchair lift, learned how to talk to people who weren't good at talking. I found a reason to live and good reason to want a better life.
But all I could afford was a shitty apartment for too much money near the park with all the homeless people. All I could afford was a shitty place that was filled with the sounds of police sirens and train horns. And everyday I would leave for work at 1pm and see the cops throwing drunk Natives into the back of their vans or cop cars.
At work I had found an authentic reason to live, a yearning to help those less fortunate, had made friends with people who needed and appreciated my help, bosses and coworkers that enjoyed my company and helped me when needed, a company that gave me a quarterly bonus just for working.
But every night, around eleven PM I would get home. Go back to hell. I had left the reservation but found a new one in the city. Would burn up in my shitty apartment that cost too much goddamn money for what-it-was. Got back home to listen to sirens and fighting. Got back home, waiting for tomorrow so I could go back to work and be away from everything.
And then I drank.
On the weekends because I had a job. And I never drove. Always used Lyft because my entire reason to live was to drive.
But I still drank.
I lived next to a pawn shop, a tattoo shop, two furniture rental shops, a motel that accepted parolees, and two liquor stores.
So every other month I would drink on the weekend. And then every payday I would drink on the weekends. And then every weekend I would drink. And then one day I was sick so I called in to work. Authentically sick. Flu of some sorts. Pounding headache and a fever. I felt awful so I called in, I accumulated 60 hours of PTO so I used some. So why not? Fuck it lets drink. So I drank. And drank and drank. Before you knew it I was at the bar.
Then I blacked out.
Then I got sucker punched.
Then I was in the back of cop car.
Then I was in a mandatory 36 hour hold.
Hungover and anxious and annoyed because I was sober, had blew zeros early but they can't let me out for another twenty something hours.
So I sat in bed and waited. Sat in bed and listened to everyone's voices reverb off of the brick walls.
It was negative twenty six degrees outside and everyone in there got thrown in to stay out of the cold.
All Native, mind you. Because Rapid City decided not to renew one of the homeless shelter's license. Not only that, but during that particular cold snap, the cops shut down a local church that was offering to keep the homeless warm through the biting subzero cold. So the homeless Natives did what they had to to survive. They got shit faced in public. One guy pissed himself in the post office just so he wouldn't freeze to death. One guy got released at eleven AM only to get thrown in at noon. He went out and got drunk as fast as he could so he wouldn't die.
And there was me, a relatively normal person. A sometimes drunk forced to sit out another twenty hours because I drank again.
Yeah.
I got out and said I couldn't live this way. I loved everything about my life except where I lived and I couldn't live anywhere else. The city was growing and it didn't have a place for someone like me. So I said fuck it. I called my boss and told him what was going on. I couldn't afford to live here anymore and that I had to leave. Not only that but I had to leave soon.
Three weeks soon.
I couldn't tell anyone that I was leaving because it would hurt too much.
Just run out the clock. Keep up appearances. Don't tell anyone you're thinking about leaving, just leave.
And I left.
On an airplane across the country because my "home" was killing me on a spiritual level. My environment was killing me. Because I was killing me.