I’ve been working for a while, and it’s been about a year of work where I initially started as an intern and became a SE + team lead very quickly. I’ve been managing this team + communicating with leadership and working on planning as well as development for about ~1 year almost.
The thing is we are a small startup with ~10-15 engineers on our engg team. I’ve received position updates / responsibility changes throughout where I ended up managing different set of people , not everyone was an intern but indeed some were.
What sort of bothers is , even the team lead part is not formalised . While me and the other team leads are called so ( officially introduced as team leads and we have some authority too ) but this isn’t really formalised in our titles in our HR software ( we don’t have a HR department / a person who does HR) . Additionally we don’t have SDE-II or mid level distinctions. We have a few senior engineers who surely are “above” us in terms of authority/ chain of command.We do have a very loosely based system at the end of the day.
Since number of years of experience mostly isn’t the only defining factor for defining your experience level , how can I better self evaluate my current skill level so that I can more consciously define what I expect when I want to switch as well as understand the fit for somewhere else for the same.
When did you know you have progressed from a junior to a mid level engineer / senior engineer ? Additionally asking them to formalise the team lead , would that be something that’d be helpful for me in the longer run? Since I do want to manage teams but don’t want to be a manager. I like doing hands on stuff including writing code. And I don’t want to get stuck as a manager.
Lastly I feel I might be thinking too early since it’s only been a year I’ve been working fulltime so, but I feel knowing better about my options can give me a better opportunity later on!

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Hi, as I said in the title, I will probably be a volunteer for refugees in Münster for about 2 months.
I'm not sure at all where I will stay as it depends on the organization I will work with and they haven't confirmed at all if will be chosen for the role.
My questions are:
1) How safe is Münster? Which places should I avoid? (I'm from a city from the south of Madrid, Spain, where the crime rate is quite high but I have lived there my whole life and I know where to go and where not to go no matter if it's on the daylight or at night).
2) I was looking for a GYM which could allow me be member for just one month. I have been searching and most have a good price but they have an initial fee that makes the price rise till 100€. This is out of my budget as I'm still an student and I don't have too much money to spend.
3) I know I will have a bicycle that the organization I volunteer with will provide. How much time would it take me to go from one place to the opposite of the city by bike?
4) Will be a problem not speaking German in Münster? My English level is quite high but idk if people there also tend to speak or want to speak English. I know from friends who work in some other places from Germany that English is normally not sponken.
5) This question may be for Germany in general. Does any supermarket as Lidl sell products high in proteins? I'm diabetic and I have to have a diet high on proteins not to lose weight as is a tendency I have and that it could carry me some health problems.
6) I'm concerned about far righ having more influence in Germany recently and as I will be working with refugees I have a little fear about the possibility of being the target from this groups of people with this ideology or who wouldn't want me there.
7) You may not have the answer for this but I have the European Health Card as a citizen from the EU. Will I be admitted at general doctor offices? Do I have to associate my European Health Card to an insurance? Are there any specific doctors that work for public health system who would accept the European Health Card to get an appointment for free (as it should be having this card), in case this is affirmative, how can I know which doctors work with the public health system and that will allow me to set an appointment with just my European health card? I have also read in the EU page for European Health card that each prescription cost 10€ but idk if it refers to prescriptions related with physiotherapists or also with meds prescriptions. German health system is really different from Spanish one and I don't understand at all what the European Health Card will cover or not and I'm worried as I have two chronic illness which I could need meds prescriptions as I'm staying for that long time.
Thanks in advance for your help

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I can’t really remember how old I was, maybe 12 or 13, but I was at my aunts house for the weekend. And me and my big group of cousins (who were around my same age, some a little older, some younger) took our regular trip to the park inside my aunts neighborhood. After maybe a half hour to an hour being there, we were in the middle of playing a game of “the floor is lava” on the park set, I realized less and less of my cousins were playing the game and it was more neighborhood kids that I was playing with instead.
After a few more minutes pass one of my cousins start calling me over to the wall he was sitting on. He was telling me to come look at something as he was facing the direction of the backyard he was looking into; I get to the wall and look over and the first thing I notice is majority of my cousins and some neighborhoods kids were already over there, and the second thing I notice is this lifeless burned body that they were standing around and it was still smoking a little (almost like it happened not too long before we found it). I hopped all the way over the wall and walked over there and immediately started asking what happened (not in a panicked manner but more so very subtle and in awe), everybody is saying they don’t know and since I was one of the last to walk over there I started to ask them if they did it but they immediately said no of course lol.
Since we were all so young it was such an unserious moment for us, and it was something we weren’t supposed to be witnessing at all at that age. But given that, we started saying that it wasn’t a real body, and one of my cousins went as far as dropping a brick on the stomach to further examine if it was a real body. After he did that I did a further look at the face and chest area…that was indeed a real body.
After a few more minutes being back there one of the neighborhood kids shouted over to us “hey the back door is open!.” And knowing what type of time my cousins were on they followed him inside the house with zero questions asked. I stayed behind for a little still looking at the body a little longer but I eventually followed them inside the house. I don’t know if they took anything but I remember standing in the middle of the this living room just looking at all these kids just rummaging through stuff and feeling wrong about the whole thing. And this feeling that something (spiritually) was there with us, it was a very heavy feeling that wouldn’t leave until the moment I left back out the house.
We ended up going straight back to my aunts house after, and we all ran in the house just blurting out what happened all at once. And after she was able to calm us all down we finally let her know what happened. It was such a crazy thing to happen to us all, I think I remember some of the neighborhood kids following us back and helped us explain the story and some of them my aunt NEVER met but this event brought them to her.
Later that day (maybe 2 or 3 hours later), we walked back to the house and the police and NEWS people were there and the street that the house was on was cut off. Only thing we were thinking about though was the NEWS being there so we ran back to my aunts and turned on the NEWS channel to see if they knew what happened (and also to see if they found little kid fingerprints everywhere lmao). Supposedly someone originally reported a house fire, but they got there to discover it was body still smoking in the backyard, after getting in contact with friends and family they also discovered they had went missing some days before that, which ultimately helped them rule it a sicide. Which never really sat well with me, because the back door being open, the body being burned in the back yard…like nothing screamed sicide to me, at least not at that age of understanding.
Another key thing that helped me remember this traumatic experience was when we went to sleep that night, we all slept in the living room (me and my cousins) and one of my older cousins woke up crying in the middle of the night and her mom (my aunt) comforted her and let her know it would be okay. Versus when I was finally able to open up to my mom about it after coming back home and being pretty creeped out and broken by it, she told me straight up “it’s your fault because you shouldn’t have been in peoples back yards”…I’m not gonna say I hated my mom or anything after that but since that day I’ve saw her in a different light for sure.
Another thing that bothers me is this very brief article that answered none of the thousand questions going through my head as I was witnessing was I witnessing in that moment:
https://www.reviewjournal.com/crime/courts/police-investigate-burned-body-found-in-las-vegas-backyard/amp/

Running around this complex is draining me, think, think. What should I look for? Thinking as I am running. Whatever is chasing me, is most likely not friendly. Power generator! This complex needs power, it is the darkness. That is sapping away my mental resilience. It is the darkness here, which blurs the line between imagination and reality, of who is chasing me.
I must banish the darkness, to make way for light. Feeling... Emotions, hope? Determination? Clarity? Yes, I remember these. After running for a while, entering to a room with notably more light, I quickly close a hatch door to buy me time to turn back online the generator. There is some technology here which should allow me to do just that.
Finally few screens respond to me tapping the keyboards, strange text... Commenced operating the computer immediately despite it... I, can read it? Make sense of it? I don't recall seeing this text before though... Or, do I? Hatch door received a powerful blow from the outside. Quick. Generator slowly and calmly roars to life. Room, which used to be murky, is now clear.
Hatch door gave in and whoever is chasing me, recovered from the body slam, by rolling and getting up on their feet. This is a new sensation, I feel, like the opposite of me, is closed to me, sealed itself away from me. Yet, I sense that this one is kin to me. It looked around in mildly alarmed manner, this one's form is now revealed to me, I see the three red eyes on him.
Two on either side of the helmet and one on the chest. There is something strange about his armor and helmet though, I focus on those details. This emotion, is strong, anger? Why do I feel anger about those... Tightly attached? No, that doesn't look like armor reinforcement. They separate from the form of the armor and helmet have in common.
It dashes towards me, I take position to receive it, I no longer fear you. As it was about to make contact with me, I crouch and prepare my left arm and shoulder, it reacts to my posture too late. I lift it up as it collides on me, then throw it over me. It landed crashing to the floor, turning to look what it will do, it rolled onto it's stomach and got up.
What should I trust? The anger? Or sense of kinship? Then it projects an emotion, I sense it. Fear? Of itself? It lunges towards me again, dodging it by stepping to the side. Have to think, it stumbled after missing me and crashed to the ground again. I don't want to hurt it... Quite sure, there is no way to knock it out...
It got up and rushes at me to punch me, instinct kicked in, following it, pivoting to my left, positioned me perfectly to counter attack safely, it's punch misses me, but, my own hits with higher kinetic energy. When it hit, it knocked attacker on the floor on it's back, I quickly back off, think, think. I can not allow it to turn off the main power to the complex or whatever the this structure is.
It is too dangerous to decommission this tech used to operate the generator with weapons that I have. Can not deviate my thought on my melee skills. It started to get up again. It's armor is more dark colored, a lot better for blending into dark places, well, except for the three red lights on whole outfit. I continue to back off and it began to chase me again.
Turning around to run, again, continued to think of what I should do, lucky for me, it doesn't have any ranged weapons but, I need to be very careful on allowing it to take one from me. Entering into... Some kind of ground vehicle garage. I see several vehicles, all of them look familiar to me, somehow... I still have some distance to my pursuer.
Although, for me to get these vehicles to work, and the garage door to open, I would need to somehow delay my pursuer. Something... Think as I continue running from my pursuer in the garage. As I pass many things, all of them giving me of thought that they wouldn't be enough to buy me time to do what I need to do.
I don't want to destroy or damage my pursuer too much. I trust the sense of kinship that I feel from looking at it, just enough that I don't want it to restrain me or knock me out. There, that is some kind of heavy duty storage unit. I run towards it and stop right in front of it. Turn to face my pursuer, it tries to knock me over.
I change my footing to knock the kick off the course and grab my pursuer from shoulders, quick turn to face the heavy duty storage unit along with my pursuer. I began to push it inside of one of them, it is still trying to restrain me only. Once I managed to push it right at the middle of the unit, I kick it towards the back wall and close the door on it.
It will hold it long enough, and it can not be opened from inside. I quickly run to the garage door terminal and start operating it. Easier than I expected, I welcome that. Now for the vehicle... There's five vehicles... First one from the rear of the garage, looks very heavily armored and armed. Big weapon barrel, and some kind of machinery...
Quick look towards the garage door opening, reveal an abandoned road, or, something like that? Second vehicle is a wheeled, relatively armored vehicle, armed with lighter weaponry than the first, third vehicle seems to be a scouting vehicle that is very heavily armed...
Fourth, some kind of military vehicle, can't really describe it well... Fifth is a open seat vehicle, with four wheels relatively close of each other, compared to the previous two vehicles... Fourth it is, I need something that is relatively light. Running to it and approaching the door, to the... Well, what I assume is the driver's position.
Door opened on it's own, no time to hesitate, I get and take seat in the vehicle. It comes to life as I enter and I start figuring out how to control it. Those pedals? Maybe one of the three? I picked the one on right and place my foot on it. Color of my leg distracted me, door closed me inside of the vehicle, and it moves forward. The wheel? I place my hands on the sides of it.
Gently turning it to the left and vehicle turns to the left, I return the vehicle middle of the road, full throttle. The road is relatively large, enough for in and out traffic for two of that heavily armored vehicle to go past each other safely. For now, it is just forward. Then I hear set of sounds from the dashboard, from my right.
"Drive to the space port." Something said, that voice... Trust... I feel, glad? I must have heard that voice before... Map began to be displayed behind the wheel... There is a projection of... Numbers... I don't understand them, beyond what the numbers are. Map has a clear line that I should drive along with...
"I need help." Say out loud, what has been bothering me for a while now, ever since waking up. I can't remember, so many things. I... Can speak?
"I know, right now, you are too far away from us, there is people at the space port next to of a blue space craft. They will say to you, earn trust. Answer to it with, family helps." Familiar voice says from the communications device installed into the vehicle...
"Okay." Reply in mildly worried tone. Where have I heard that voice? Why does it make me feel like I can trust it? Why do I feel warm when I hear it? I glance at the map again... Better it than nothing... As, I don't have any plan... I don't even know who, what, why, where I am...
Right as I was about to focus on how I look, I notice other vehicles in a larger road which is part of my path, I quickly avoid few collisions and stabilize the vehicle and go full speed towards the space port, while avoiding the other traffic. I look around myself, this place, looks familiar, to an extent. These gaps in my memory are making me nervous.
Can't this thing go any faster? I really want some answers... The map displays that the space port is not too far away. I notice something on a mirror, a vehicle, it is chasing me. Lights on the vehicle started blinking, crap! It's a law enforcement vehicle and personnel! I really don't want to hurt them... They look strange but, I feel like I have seen them before...
This chase is incredibly dangerous. I keep them good distance away from me, it seems that their vehicle is also reaching it's speed limit. I just need to keep my focus on avoiding other traffic and make sure that the chase is safe for other traffic. Quick glance at the map shows that I need to take an exit ramp on my right.
I steer my vehicle there, going slightly off road to avoid hitting other traffic and slow down, I turn right as the vehicle I drive reached an intersection and, there, I see it, the space port. Now, I just need to be faster than my pursuers. Should be easy. I stop at a parking hall of some kind and get out of the vehicle, because the door opened when the vehicle came to full stop.
I dismount and hear the pursuing vehicle also start decelerating. Kicking the ground, I quickly accelerated to high speed sprint and keep running, to get into the space port building. Once I got in, and deeper into the building, I see the blue space craft, it is large. I quickly run towards it, there is some sentient beings near of it.
I run to them. "Earn trust." One of them says, voice masked by a speaker in the helmet to project the voice outside of it.
"Family helps." Reply to it. The clothing they wear, they look very familiar... The one who spoke to me the key word motioned me to get in, the door into the ship opens and enter the ship, with the other different looking sentient beings than the majority here.
The ship immediately started ascending. "Who are you?" Immediately question them after the door closed.
"Friendly. We can unmask now squad." The one who spoke the key word to me says and began to take off it's helmet. The face, it, looks like, I am somehow related? I started to look at myself, it looks amazing... Yellow, blue and white colors, are most dominant on this armor and base suit. It looks so nice.
Other people here also took their helmets off. Human? That, feels like, what I am... I want to take my own helmet off. "I need a mirror." Say quickly and feel my own helmet to try to figure out how to take it off. I felt it loosen and I was able to take it off.
"Take a seat if you want. Lady, let's just say that you really went through something seriously unusual." He, replies to me, as I took the helmet off and look around. He? Yes, he. Lady? Woman? Why can't I remember? One of the other humans brought me a mirror and I receive it from him gently.
This? Is my face? Who... I am? Slowly, yes, this is me. I, look different? I think...
"What happened to me?" I ask as I am so lost and confused.
"You might want to calm down before I say this to you." He replies to me, not exactly sure of something.
I notice some seats near of me, and I sit down on one of them, I keep staring at my reflection. Silence is so strong right now. "We believe you have been abducted with a convincing cover, to be part of some kind of project." He replies, waiting for me to respond.
I look at him, he is slightly uncomfortable to say what I need to know... "Abducted?" I ask from him.
"Yes, although we need to confirm a couple things first. I need you to do couple things before I explain it further and answer to questions you have. Is this okay?" He asks, he sounds slightly worried how I will respond.
I look into his eyes, I sense, unease and, him knowing... How I feel? Quickly pondered how should I respond... "Okay, just explain what and why you need me to do it." Say slightly uneasy but, comply with conditions.
"I need to first identify who you are, this is an audio recorder, it is connected to a data base of identities of a lot of people. This is an eye scanner, it will help the system to identify, who you are. Do you feel comfortable enough to begin?" He asks mildly worried but, ready for my response, as it showed me two small devices.
"Okay. What do you want me to say?" I ask from him, feeling mildly worried myself too.
"That was more than enough. For this one, I just need you to stare at me, I will place the this device between you and me, over both of your eyes to make the scan. Are you ready?" He replies to me in neutral tone.
I let out a deep sigh and stare into his eyes. "Alright, do it." Reply to him, and keep staring into his eyes. He uses the device just as he described and nodded to me, when it was done. I break eye contact with him, as I feel uneasy.
"You can ask away now, we don't have the search result yet." He replies to me and takes a seat opposite of me. Which question should I even start with?

Running around this complex is draining me, think, think. What should I look for? Thinking as I am running. Whatever is chasing me, is most likely not friendly. Power generator! This complex needs power, it is the darkness. That is sapping away my mental resilience. It is the darkness here, which blurs the line between imagination and reality, of who is chasing me.
I must banish the darkness, to make way for light. Feeling... Emotions, hope? Determination? Clarity? Yes, I remember these. After running for a while, entering to a room with notably more light, I quickly close a hatch door to buy me time to turn back online the generator. There is some technology here which should allow me to do just that.
Finally few screens respond to me tapping the keyboards, strange text... Commenced operating the computer immediately despite it... I, can read it? Make sense of it? I don't recall seeing this text before though... Or, do I? Hatch door received a powerful blow from the outside. Quick. Generator slowly and calmly roars to life. Room, which used to be murky, is now clear.
Hatch door gave in and whoever is chasing me, recovered from the body slam, by rolling and getting up on their feet. This is a new sensation, I feel, like the opposite of me, is closed to me, sealed itself away from me. Yet, I sense that this one is kin to me. It looked around in mildly alarmed manner, this one's form is now revealed to me, I see the three red eyes on him.
Two on either side of the helmet and one on the chest. There is something strange about his armor and helmet though, I focus on those details. This emotion, is strong, anger? Why do I feel anger about those... Tightly attached? No, that doesn't look like armor reinforcement. They separate from the form of the armor and helmet have in common.
It dashes towards me, I take position to receive it, I no longer fear you. As it was about to make contact with me, I crouch and prepare my left arm and shoulder, it reacts to my posture too late. I lift it up as it collides on me, then throw it over me. It landed crashing to the floor, turning to look what it will do, it rolled onto it's stomach and got up.
What should I trust? The anger? Or sense of kinship? Then it projects an emotion, I sense it. Fear? Of itself? It lunges towards me again, dodging it by stepping to the side. Have to think, it stumbled after missing me and crashed to the ground again. I don't want to hurt it... Quite sure, there is no way to knock it out...
It got up and rushes at me to punch me, instinct kicked in, following it, pivoting to my left, positioned me perfectly to counter attack safely, it's punch misses me, but, my own hits with higher kinetic energy. When it hit, it knocked attacker on the floor on it's back, I quickly back off, think, think. I can not allow it to turn off the main power to the complex or whatever the this structure is.
It is too dangerous to decommission this tech used to operate the generator with weapons that I have. Can not deviate my thought on my melee skills. It started to get up again. It's armor is more dark colored, a lot better for blending into dark places, well, except for the three red lights on whole outfit. I continue to back off and it began to chase me again.
Turning around to run, again, continued to think of what I should do, lucky for me, it doesn't have any ranged weapons but, I need to be very careful on allowing it to take one from me. Entering into... Some kind of ground vehicle garage. I see several vehicles, all of them look familiar to me, somehow... I still have some distance to my pursuer.
Although, for me to get these vehicles to work, and the garage door to open, I would need to somehow delay my pursuer. Something... Think as I continue running from my pursuer in the garage. As I pass many things, all of them giving me of thought that they wouldn't be enough to buy me time to do what I need to do.
I don't want to destroy or damage my pursuer too much. I trust the sense of kinship that I feel from looking at it, just enough that I don't want it to restrain me or knock me out. There, that is some kind of heavy duty storage unit. I run towards it and stop right in front of it. Turn to face my pursuer, it tries to knock me over.
I change my footing to knock the kick off the course and grab my pursuer from shoulders, quick turn to face the heavy duty storage unit along with my pursuer. I began to push it inside of one of them, it is still trying to restrain me only. Once I managed to push it right at the middle of the unit, I kick it towards the back wall and close the door on it.
It will hold it long enough, and it can not be opened from inside. I quickly run to the garage door terminal and start operating it. Easier than I expected, I welcome that. Now for the vehicle... There's five vehicles... First one from the rear of the garage, looks very heavily armored and armed. Big weapon barrel, and some kind of machinery...
Quick look towards the garage door opening, reveal an abandoned road, or, something like that? Second vehicle is a wheeled, relatively armored vehicle, armed with lighter weaponry than the first, third vehicle seems to be a scouting vehicle that is very heavily armed...
Fourth, some kind of military vehicle, can't really describe it well... Fifth is a open seat vehicle, with four wheels relatively close of each other, compared to the previous two vehicles... Fourth it is, I need something that is relatively light. Running to it and approaching the door, to the... Well, what I assume is the driver's position.
Door opened on it's own, no time to hesitate, I get and take seat in the vehicle. It comes to life as I enter and I start figuring out how to control it. Those pedals? Maybe one of the three? I picked the one on right and place my foot on it. Color of my leg distracted me, door closed me inside of the vehicle, and it moves forward. The wheel? I place my hands on the sides of it.
Gently turning it to the left and vehicle turns to the left, I return the vehicle middle of the road, full throttle. The road is relatively large, enough for in and out traffic for two of that heavily armored vehicle to go past each other safely. For now, it is just forward. Then I hear set of sounds from the dashboard, from my right.
"Drive to the space port." Something said, that voice... Trust... I feel, glad? I must have heard that voice before... Map began to be displayed behind the wheel... There is a projection of... Numbers... I don't understand them, beyond what the numbers are. Map has a clear line that I should drive along with...
"I need help." Say out loud, what has been bothering me for a while now, ever since waking up. I can't remember, so many things. I... Can speak?
"I know, right now, you are too far away from us, there is people at the space port next to of a blue space craft. They will say to you, earn trust. Answer to it with, family helps." Familiar voice says from the communications device installed into the vehicle...
"Okay." Reply in mildly worried tone. Where have I heard that voice? Why does it make me feel like I can trust it? Why do I feel warm when I hear it? I glance at the map again... Better it than nothing... As, I don't have any plan... I don't even know who, what, why, where I am...
Right as I was about to focus on how I look, I notice other vehicles in a larger road which is part of my path, I quickly avoid few collisions and stabilize the vehicle and go full speed towards the space port, while avoiding the other traffic. I look around myself, this place, looks familiar, to an extent. These gaps in my memory are making me nervous.
Can't this thing go any faster? I really want some answers... The map displays that the space port is not too far away. I notice something on a mirror, a vehicle, it is chasing me. Lights on the vehicle started blinking, crap! It's a law enforcement vehicle and personnel! I really don't want to hurt them... They look strange but, I feel like I have seen them before...
This chase is incredibly dangerous. I keep them good distance away from me, it seems that their vehicle is also reaching it's speed limit. I just need to keep my focus on avoiding other traffic and make sure that the chase is safe for other traffic. Quick glance at the map shows that I need to take an exit ramp on my right.
I steer my vehicle there, going slightly off road to avoid hitting other traffic and slow down, I turn right as the vehicle I drive reached an intersection and, there, I see it, the space port. Now, I just need to be faster than my pursuers. Should be easy. I stop at a parking hall of some kind and get out of the vehicle, because the door opened when the vehicle came to full stop.
I dismount and hear the pursuing vehicle also start decelerating. Kicking the ground, I quickly accelerated to high speed sprint and keep running, to get into the space port building. Once I got in, and deeper into the building, I see the blue space craft, it is large. I quickly run towards it, there is some sentient beings near of it.
I run to them. "Earn trust." One of them says, voice masked by a speaker in the helmet to project the voice outside of it.
"Family helps." Reply to it. The clothing they wear, they look very familiar... The one who spoke to me the key word motioned me to get in, the door into the ship opens and enter the ship, with the other different looking sentient beings than the majority here.
The ship immediately started ascending. "Who are you?" Immediately question them after the door closed.
"Friendly. We can unmask now squad." The one who spoke the key word to me says and began to take off it's helmet. The face, it, looks like, I am somehow related? I started to look at myself, it looks amazing... Yellow, blue and white colors, are most dominant on this armor and base suit. It looks so nice.
Other people here also took their helmets off. Human? That, feels like, what I am... I want to take my own helmet off. "I need a mirror." Say quickly and feel my own helmet to try to figure out how to take it off. I felt it loosen and I was able to take it off.
"Take a seat if you want. Lady, let's just say that you really went through something seriously unusual." He, replies to me, as I took the helmet off and look around. He? Yes, he. Lady? Woman? Why can't I remember? One of the other humans brought me a mirror and I receive it from him gently.
This? Is my face? Who... I am? Slowly, yes, this is me. I, look different? I think...
"What happened to me?" I ask as I am so lost and confused.
"You might want to calm down before I say this to you." He replies to me, not exactly sure of something.
I notice some seats near of me, and I sit down on one of them, I keep staring at my reflection. Silence is so strong right now. "We believe you have been abducted with a convincing cover, to be part of some kind of project." He replies, waiting for me to respond.
I look at him, he is slightly uncomfortable to say what I need to know... "Abducted?" I ask from him.
"Yes, although we need to confirm a couple things first. I need you to do couple things before I explain it further and answer to questions you have. Is this okay?" He asks, he sounds slightly worried how I will respond.
I look into his eyes, I sense, unease and, him knowing... How I feel? Quickly pondered how should I respond... "Okay, just explain what and why you need me to do it." Say slightly uneasy but, comply with conditions.
"I need to first identify who you are, this is an audio recorder, it is connected to a data base of identities of a lot of people. This is an eye scanner, it will help the system to identify, who you are. Do you feel comfortable enough to begin?" He asks mildly worried but, ready for my response, as it showed me two small devices.
"Okay. What do you want me to say?" I ask from him, feeling mildly worried myself too.
"That was more than enough. For this one, I just need you to stare at me, I will place the this device between you and me, over both of your eyes to make the scan. Are you ready?" He replies to me in neutral tone.
I let out a deep sigh and stare into his eyes. "Alright, do it." Reply to him, and keep staring into his eyes. He uses the device just as he described and nodded to me, when it was done. I break eye contact with him, as I feel uneasy.
"You can ask away now, we don't have the search result yet." He replies to me and takes a seat opposite of me. Which question should I even start with?

Table of Contents

1. tl;dr
2. Summary
3. Intro
4. 7 steps
   1. Omnivore
   2. 1 Fluid
   3. 2 Fuel
   4. 3 Fresh
   5. 4 Fat
   6. 5 Fruit
   7. 6 Veg
   8. 7 Snack
   9. Beyond AAD
5. Regimen
   1. Morning
   2. Between meals:
   3. Afternoon
   4. Travel
6. Details

tl;dr

Japanese women live the longest; traditional "ama" divers catch crustaceans by hand.
This inspired my chicken soup of the sea: rice, shrimp and mackerel.
Can you guess which causes the longevity?
PIC: How to tell when a shrimp is perfectly cooked
https://preview.redd.it/ioy13ankti5d1.jpg?width=602&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f6561f8cd0dfa03e90f4fe35fa229651f459359e

Summary

Ama (海女, "sea women") are Japanese divers famous for collecting pearls, though traditionally their main catch is seafood.[1] The vast majority of ama are women.

An optimal diet should imitate the diet of the world's longest-lived people: Japanese women. What sets Japan apart from runners-up such as South Korea is high shrimp consumption.
Longevity is sexy:

• Tokyo Fish Market, 1964
• Japanese ama divers, with a diet primarily consisting of sea food, had impressive occlusions #mewtivation
• Japanese Ama divers, 1950s

I cut the seafood-rice diet down to the absolute minimum:

An elimination diet, also known as exclusion diet, is a diagnostic procedure used to identify foods that an individual cannot consume without adverse effects.

An optimal elimination diet follows the pattern of recovering from an upset stomach:

1. For fluid, drink hot water with a pinch of sea salt "tea".
2. For fuel, start with white rice congee. After #6 add brown rice, pre-soaked.
3. For fresh, have 50g frozen sea meat (shrimp) per day. The rest can be canned.
4. For fat, have a can of ocean fish (mackerel etc) per day. Watch the mercury.
5. For fruit, have a small orange with the plain rice (vit c).
6. For veg, lightly cook some spinach leaves with the shrimp (vit b).
7. For snack, have dried seaweed sheets and a handful of mixed tree nuts soaked overnight.

Take it one step at a time. These are sequenced in order of short-term priority to stay productive. Everything is low-FODMAPS except the nuts.
1-4 are like a healthier version of chicken soup: Both are high in methionine, salt and rice.
Methionine stops hunger. Eating less extends lifespan dramatically:

The exact manner by which calories are reduced changes across studies, but the animals’ calorie intakes are generally reduced by as much as half their normal levels. Depending on the species, the most promising results have shown lifespan extensions between 50 and 300%.

This diet can probably cut your calorie intake in half without trying, and your food budget as well.
A strong baseline makes it easy to detect harmful foods. You can thrive on just this, but why limit yourself? Establish a performance baseline, then introduce a new ingredient.

Intro

When I was a young man, I regarded cooking as a chore and simply wanted to eat healthy to gain muscle without wasting time. As a result, I ate a lot of Campbell's Chunky Soup and crackers. Not great for my sodium intake.
I sympathize with those who insist that a "minimum viable diet" should mean something simple and repeatable such as beef, potatoes and greens. Sounds great! If you're looking for lazy cooking, just learn some simple pressure cooker recipes. It does get more complicated than "throw tasty things in pot".
I might've continued as a culinary barbarian, had I not made some bad life choices, chief among which was taking a light course of Accutane, which is proven to cause Inflammatory Bowel Disease by aging epithelial stem cells. This caused my gut lining to gradually age, until I must now eat mush like an old man.
The struggle to find foods that didn't incapacitate me lead me to elimination diets and a journey into true minimalism, the meaning of which I hadn't appreciated before: not minimum cooking effort, but minimum digestive difficulty.
My eventual solution happened to align with the diet of the longest-lived people in the world – the Japanese. (Well, the women are longest-lived. The men work and drink themselves to death.) Apparently, the secret to their longevity is eating a lot of shrimp and rice. White rice is considered hypoallergenic, and shrimp induces satiety via methionine, permitting calorie restriction.
Doctors have been unable to label my condition with any specific diagnosis, despite extensive tests and endoscopy. So I believe my solution is generalizable to those without specific problems, who nonetheless find themselves plagued with Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS).
The less energy the gut must spend on digestion, the more energy the brain has to focus productively. Ancestral hunter gatherers could afford to lie around after a big meal; office workers not so much.
Even healthy people may be interested in the productivity benefits of easy digestion. Soylent is popular for this reason. The aquatic ape diet is healthier, easier to digest, and much cheaper.
Soylent costs about $225 per month. In a typical day I eat:

• for fuel, 4 handfuls of unenriched rice = 43g * 4 = 173g = 621 calories = .50 USD
• for fresh, a handful of frozen organic shrimp = 52g = 52 calories = 7.70 RMB = 1.06 USD
• for fat, 200g canned mackerel (or similar) = 312 calories = 6.5 RMB = .9 USD
• for fruit, small oranges sell for about a dollar each, so $2 for two = 90 calories
• for veg, spinach costs $2 and lasts 10 days, so .20 USD = 14 calories
• total calories = 1089
• $total = 4.66 USD daily * 30.4 days = $142 per month

As you can see, the AA baseline diet is slightly more expensive per calorie, but higher satiety so one eats less. If cost is a concern, you can easily cut to one small orange per day, dropping the price to $111 per month. Or replace oranges entirely with a vitamin c pill, which costs under 10 cents per dose. Then the cost would be $84 per month.
Most people don't want to eat minimally, and that's fine. However, those who hate cooking can keep the minimal ingredients at home, then indulge at restaurants. Or travel with Soylent and never miss a meal.

7 steps

Omnivore

Humans are omnivores. Thus a proper minimal diet will consume both plants and animals. Among mammals, even herbivores are usually opportunistic carnivores. Compensating for pure vegetarianism or carnivory complicates things considerably, as icebound Eskimos and smooth-brained koala vegans demonstrate.
Given omnivory, a minimal diet has three major requirements:

1. Fuel: either eat enough carbs and fat, or burn your own fat.
2. Fresh: for volatile water-soluble vitamins and animal protein.
3. Fat: for fat-soluble vitamins and well-being.

These are listed in order of priority.
One can get water-soluble vitamins from lightly-cooked meat, if one eats the right animals or organs in sufficient quantities. However, it is usually easier to get them from fruits and vegetables.

1 Fluid

The Romans paid legionnaires in sea salt, leading to the expression, "Worth his salt". Without sea salt, humans develop goiters.
During a severe IBS episode, you often stop eating. That is fine, humans can fast for weeks. Just drink sea salt "tea" until your gut calms.
This staves off dehydration, but gets quite hungry. When ready to rise and cook, proceed to the next step. Until then, have a toothpick and relax. (Chewing on something is a good way to stop eating.)

2 Fuel

The first step of recovery is to have some bland white rice congee. It is usually the easiest thing to digest. (If not, try soaking or pick another grain.) Starch fuel prevents starvation, conserving body fat on skinny chronic IBS sufferers. You need enough calories to stay active.
Put a 1-2 handfuls of rice and generous water into the pressure cooker, then cook until congee.
Plain white rice does get boring. So alternate white with brown rice. Brown rice has insoluble fiber, which is hardest to digest. So start with just a pinch of brown rice in white, which will change the flavor of the pot enough to fool your brain. If you can tolerate insoluble fiber, then increase the ratio. Gas is a key sign you can't.
If you're constipated, increase the ratio of brown rice. Fiber keeps you regular.

3 Fresh

The next step is to consume healthy fresh meat. The healthiest sea meat is shrimp. Just a handful will induce satiety via methionine. Briefly auto-warm them in the pressure cooker until they curl into a c-shape, not o. (This is safe, because saltwater shrimp parasites can't transfer to freshwater hosts.) Eat the shrimp before cooling, and save the broth for the next rice pot.
Wild meat is healthier than farmed, and saltwater is healthier than terrestrial. Humans are primarily a littoral species, even today. Our hairlessness is an aquatic adaptation (hippos, elephants); chimps can't swim. Our other closest relative, the pig, is semi-aquatic like us, and shares many anatomical features such as nose shape and eye color. Pigs, not chimps, are the main animal source for organ transplants into humans.

4 Fat

Fat is the second hardest to digest, but the most rewarding. It's what puts a smile on your face and heat in your extremities. Fat soluble vitamins degrade slowly, so canned food is fine. Mackerel is incredibly cheap and delicious. At 13% fat, it is sufficient but not overwhelming to weak guts. The bones are easy to eat around. Save the broth for the next rice pot.
Watch the toxin accumulation. Maximum is 200g mackerel per day, due to arsenic. Try alternating with other fish, such as tuna, sardines and salmon.
If you have fat malabsorption, try putting cholestyramine powder in the rice pot preceding the fatty meal, and look into UDCA. Eating fat is essential to enjoy life. Hence the expression, "Fat and happy."

5 Fruit

Fruit poses two digestive challenges: fructose and insoluble fiber. We can dilute the former and minimize the latter.
Apples have lots of insoluble fiber, making them chewy. Oranges have little, making them juicy.
Fruit is full of concentrated sugar, and the fructose in particular can irritate weak guts. Sugar provides short term energy. Thus an orange complements a pot of white rice congee.
By itself, the congee is bland starch, which provides long-term energy and filling comfort. Eat the orange as appetizer, then the congee as main course. Having this twice per day is a treat.

6 Veg

Vegetables contain even more insoluble fiber than fruit. One solution is to cook them to mush, but this destroys their b-vitamins, the main reason to eat them.
The solution is to use a soft vegetable that can be eaten raw and is high in vitamin b. Parsley and spinach both work, and go nicely with shrimp. Just throw them both into the pot on auto-warm at the same time.

7 Snack

With diets, cheating is always a danger, so one should try to fulfill cravings with healthy snacks. Dried seaweed have the salt, crunch and complex flavor to satisfy the potato chip craving. A handful of mixed tree nuts soaked overnight satisfies the desire for something more substantial, and puts the pot to good use.

Beyond AAD

Congratulations, you've completed the Aquatic Ape diet! Now you can add whatever works for you.
Having a strong baseline means it's easy to tell when something makes you feel worse. Similarly, being malnourished makes it easy to tell when you eat something that was previously missing. Malnourishment is not a pleasant baseline, so I recommend the former!
I'm sure you're eager to get to the steak and potatoes. The Weston Price Foundation has many great recipes for healthy indulgence.

Regimen

Morning

1. handful of unenriched white rice, pressure cooked to congee, eaten before cooling to avoid resistant starch. Small orange appetizer first.
2. clean pot and dish
3. 200g of wild-caught organic canned fish (no additives)
4. in leftover broth, pressure cook longer a handful of white rice with pinch of organic tricolor brown rice (to fool blandness perception)
5. clean pot and dish

Between meals:

• chew on a toothpick to distract from hunger
• pinch of sea salt in hot water

Afternoon

1. handful of unenriched white rice, pressure cooked to congee, eaten before cooling to avoid resistant starch. Small orange appetizer first.
2. clean pot and dish
3. handful of spinach and handful of wild-caught saltwater shelled shrimp (no additives) auto-heated to c-shape, not o-shape (that's overdone)
4. in leftover broth, pressure cook longer a handful of white rice with pinch of organic tricolor brown rice (to fool blandness perception)
5. clean pot and dish

The shrimp induces satiety for intermittent fasting.

Travel

Travel is tough. Suggestions welcome. Here's what I've got:

• bring toothpicks and sea salt
• buy hot white rice and water
• dry foods: pemmican, jerky or Soylent
• wet meat: canned fish, steamed shrimp
• vit b & c: spinach, lemon juice, small oranges

Details

Continued here due to length.

Hey All!
Wanted to share my journey how I quit porn & masturbation cycle addiction. This might be considered less popular approach (I've tried streaks but somehow always ended up watching again), but what matters is that it lead me to full recovery. I don't feel any urge to watch porn anymore. If you're like me maybe this will help. I wish you guys fully recover, whatever path you take!

Background

Like many of you I've been exposed to porn at a young age, around 12 y/o. Started with paper magazines, but after getting internet I started watching videos and became addicted. I was using porn and masturbation to self-regulate, especially my emotions. I would be coming home from school, being stressed and anxious, and using PMO as a means to "relax".
Fortunately, I was able to get a girlfriend at some point, so I stopped watching porn and masturbating and focused on having sex. While this was awesome at the time, looking back I can see that porn created a craving that no amount of sex was ever enough, so I was still using sex as a mean to self-regulate, keeping myself at low energy by constantly ejaculating.
Fast forward to now where I've been in a couple of relationships in my life. Porn and masturbation always came back as a problem, because I didn't fully heal. When things were bad, for example when we were fighting, I would often use PMO as a means to self-regulate again, because that was the only way I knew how to deal with my emotions. I would also use PMO while I was physically away from my girlfriends, because of being addicted to sex/orgasm. Masturbation and porn became sex addition, and sex obsession, which is just a different expression of the same problem.
After each relationship I would be back watching porn and masturbating, because I didn't know how to deal with the heartbreak, which hindered my emotional healing. I would be also looking for casual sex. Again, all as a means of self-regulation, because that was the only way I knew how to deal with my emotions.
Being on the spiritual path as well for a while, and having some level of awareness, there's been many times where I realised this is a problem in my life and that I need to do something about it. In high school I had couple of instances of "deleting everything" (all the stashed porn, on DVDs back then). Later deleting downloaded videos or saved links. I had good intentions each time, knowing I need to do something about this, however the addiction still would eventually come back.
After my last heartbreak however, I decided to get out of this once and for all. I realised how closed-off I am emotionally, that I objectify women (that their bodies are means to get gratification), realised how obsessed I am about sex. I didn't want to be that kind of man. If there is a deep craving in you to change, you can change, you can use this craving as fuel for your journey and growth.
I set a strong intention to heal myself from all the hurt I caused myself in the past with porn & masturbation...

Healing journey

Each time before I tried a cold-turkey approach ("I'm deleting everything and never watching porn again!" type of thing) and that has never worked. It was just too abrupt. This requires Buddha-level willpower. Most of us don't have this kind of willpower. I certainly don't, so instead I went on the NoFap journey one step at the time.
Please have in mind that I'm just sharing my experience here. There are many other ways to heal, I'm just sharing my story in hopes you can benefit from it.

• I stopped watching hardcore stuff

As your porn addiction progresses, chances are you ended up looking at more hardcore stuff over time. You might remember being a kid and being turned on by a pic of boobs, but now you need to watch a gangbang video to get off. Most of the hardcore stuff is not realistic, it's not how sex in real life looks like. So at first I started filtering what I'm watching to realistic content. The amateur content was the best in that case - they are not actors in a production but real people recording their sex life.

• I set a "date" with myself once a week

Instead of masturbating whenever I wanted, I set a time and day in form of a "date" with myself. For example Sunday evening: I will watch a single amateur porn video and masturbate and orgasm only once. This allowed me to go from ~3 times a week to 1 time a week and have something to "look forward to" in the beginning. It was the first step to disconnect the PMO from the auto-regulation loop I got stuck in. Now, if I'm stressed or anxious mid week, I cannot just "masturbate it away". I need to deal with these emotions. At the same time I'm not getting "blue balls" because I'm ejaculating once a week at a set time.
For me this was the most important intermediate step to heal. This is admitting I have a problem, and regulating it, but not allowing excessive use. Needless to say this is still harmful, but allows to "dial down" slowly. I set the intention to be in this stage only for a limited time.

• I cut off different "reminders" that encouraged the habit

Needless to say, all porn images/videos/links got deleted, but didn't stop there. Deleted Instagram (the algo was showing too many pretty women), moved all the "fap items" away so they are less accessible (like putting lube/fleshlight into a storage box etc.), and became very careful about the "normal" content I'm consuming whether it's Spotify songs or podcasts or Youtube or articles. Just trying to avoid anything that is sex-charged (which you probably noticed already is really hard in this world because humanity is obsessed about sex). Reading Reddit or watching youtube about NoFap helped here, because it reminds you about the intention to get better and to heal yourself. It keeps you focused and gives you purpose on this journey.
I started with the above three points at the same time for about 4 months as the first step. I was also working out, meditating, eating healthy, getting sunlight etc. All the usual "healthy lifestyle" stuff. There was no set timeline of "4 months", it just so happened. At first I struggled to make it to my "date" once a week. That's when I realised how weak I was: that I couldn't even hold it for a week knowing I'm allowing myself to orgasm on a given day!! However, after many weeks, I reached a point when I started to push the "date" further. 8 days, 10 days, partially as a challenge and partially because didn't feel like it anymore on that given day. That's when I felt like it's time to move on...

• I switched to audio porn

While keeping the 1 "date" a week schedule with myself, I stopped watching videos altogether and started listening to audio only (very soft stuff like special amateur JOI audio recordings). This shifted the focus from visual stimulation to fantasising. When you listen, you have space to imagine, but most importantly you get to feel all the sensations from the genitals. This is where masturbation became more like "self pleasure". It wasn't rough, quick, with the only point to get off. I was enjoying all the sensations. It became less compulsive and more like a self-care act because of my body's sexual needs.
I used audio for about 2-3 months and then realised I'm sometimes enjoying the sensations so much that I don't need the audio anymore.

• I only used imagination

This is how many women masturbate. Women are generally more in tune with their bodies and emotions and have good imagination. As a lady you would "set the mood" and get into it slowly. You don't go straight for the genitals. You give yourself a bath, light a candle, stroke your body slowly, put some sexy music on, and just very sensually get into it. You set the mood.
I feel like we have a lot to learn from women in this regard. So, I would use only imagination and massage oil to pleasure myself. I would do it no more than once a week, but sometimes I just didn't feel the need anymore. Sometimes 10 days would go by, sometimes two weeks. I would self pleasure very sensually, very slowly. I set the mood as if I was to make love with someone special.
I learned so much from that experience, which is hard to put into words. I was much more in tune with my body, with my emotions, especially with lust, and it didn't feel like I'm "fapping" at all anymore. It felt like act of self love. Sometimes the experience was beautiful and I would even tear up. I didn't feel the need to watch or listen to porn at all anymore. I realised my body and mind are enough to pleasure myself, that no external stimuli (porn) is needed. Your awareness is enough! Sometimes I wouldn't even imagine anything, because the sensations were just so amazing I would only focus on the sensations. This put emphasis on staying focused and present during the act. I would sometimes even not orgasm at all, because I was just happy with all the sensations!

• I started "semen retention"

This is the last thing I had done and I'm onto it now. I stopped even with the self-pleasure acts, because I want to heal from lust completely. Getting off porn isn't enough for me. I don't want to be addicted to sex anymore too. While these acts came from a totally different place of awareness than "fapping" and allowed me to get so in tune with my body and emotions, I want to see what lies further.
I feel like the NoFap community's idea ends here, because getting a girlfriend and starting to have sex is considered a win. While it definitely is - relative to being stuck in porn addiction - the journey doesn't need to stop there. I realised that when I don't ejaculate I have overall more energy, more drive, and my focus and spiritual practices are all enhanced. Being in a relationship and having sex is a wonderful experience, however I don't want it to be tainted by lust. I'm currently single and I don't want to introduce a new woman in my life just because I need them. I want my life to be so overflowing with joy that I attract someone into my life, rather than chasing them.
Since there is a semen retention subreddit about this, I will stop here.

Conclusion

This was my journey about healing from porn, which now transformed into healing from lust and sex addiction. There is no question about porn dealing deep damage in our systems. It takes a while to undo all the damage we have done upon ourselves. It requires setting the right intention, putting the effort, and having the determination to become the best version of yourself.
I noticed the NoFap community is obsessed about "streaks" and "relapses". Putting so much pressure on yourself isn't always the best thing. I feel like with any habit or addiction, it's best to change it slowly, and replace it with better habits. Hardcore addictions like heroin addiction is often replacing heroin with less addictive drug, and then slowly reducing the dosage. While I'm obviously not advocating with this that you should keep fapping, instead of focusing on streaks/relapses cycles maybe you could try a more balanced approach if others have failed - as long as it gets you to fully heal!
That's what I wish for all of you guys!

Hey. I'm a long time Train watcher and I made a reddit account just to post this.
I'm personally not a tech guy and know absolutely nothing, but I have no reason to believe the information I have is false. In fact, it's probably as authentic as I could imagine it to be coming from the gambling industry.
I went to school ~20 years ago with a guy who I recently met at a summer activity. We ended up chatting and I found out he worked for a game operator for a decade, working on back-end of online slots and even leading an entire team for a time. He quit during covid and has since moved on to other things meaning he's not affiliated with anyone, so I instantly thought of Train's gambling adventures and saw my opportunity to ask any questions I could squeeze in. He was kind enough to reciprocate.
Now he hasn't worked in the industry for a few years, so some things could've changed, but he believes the main principles are still the same.
I believe I learned how slots work for real, and no, there's no tricks to win. However what I learned I haven't heard before, so I'm assuming most people don't know half of it. One thing is for sure, slots don't work the way Train thinks and I think re-wiring his brain would benefit him so much to last longer.
Before I explain, keep in mind Stake originals don't work like this. They're provably fair games and different, the entire idea being you get generated a seed that you stay on until you change it, and they don't even use RNG. Stake has an article on this on their website. Regular slots operate under RNG.
So with that out of the way, components to online slots:
Game Server - the brains. handles everything including RNG, network activity and balance. Typically a physical desktop computer. There are many of them, and different slots from the same provider can use the same one.
Load Balancer - acts like traffic control, sends you to one of the servers when you open a game and ensures servers won't be overloaded.
True RNG - a piece of hardware installed into the server. Generates actual random numbers based on something like white noise.
Pseudo RNG - deterministic algorithm, a software. Gives us numbers that the slots then use to generate results.
Apparently implementations can differ, but the core idea is always the same.
Ideally, they would use the True RNG for every single spin we make because that's actually random. But it's too slow, and that's why they have to use a Pseudo RNG that's as fast as you need it to be. However, it's deterministic, meaning if you ran it from beginning to the end and make a graph, it would always end up doing the same thing, and naturally, could be exploited.
So what they do to counter this is they use the True RNG to "seed" the Pseudo RNG. So seeding exists, but it's not at a player or account level. It's literally the software itself that gets seeded.
What they can do as well, is use another Pseudo RNG to seed it further, by using a string of things such as stake, currency, server time and date.
What's more, is that this process actually occurs quite often to increase randomness. So if you play a slot for an hour, you've been on multiple seeds.
Now it's all just numbers, and there's no concept of good or bad, and different slots use different numbers for results. This is why slots will never make sense. You can play a particular game and be on a disgusting run of losing for hours, ie. repeatedly get "bad" seeds. You can also play a slot for 2 hours and it just keeps paying, repeatedly getting "good" seeds. But there's no math to it in the short-term. Seed won't turn good just because the last one was bad. And because different slots use different numbers, that bad seed could've been good on another game.
Even if you believe none of this, thinking there's 1 seed in general makes no sense since you're playing different servers. Server A doesn't have anything to do with Server B. Then you would have to think you have your own seed on every single one of them.
You can actually find out what server you're playing by opening up browser console, network tab and clicking on your spin and checking the IP address.
They can store your information in a cloud, like your game history, but this has nothing to do with the RNG. They need this information to be able to double check results if need be and provide replays, or in specific games save your progress if there's a progressive feature. So if your info is reset, again it's not "a seed reseted".
I didn't fully understand this part, but apparently other players playing on the same server (regardless of slot) affects game results as well, since they're cycling through variables. Again, I don't know how this precisely works, but I didn't want to pry too much.
However, when they simulate the RTP for a slot, the simulation is done on an isolated server. Meaning the simulation will get everything the RNG gives it, good or bad. If max win numbers line up next, the simulation will get it. Wins and losses aren't (unevenly) divided amongst people if that makes sense. This is why after a certain amount of spins the RTP starts to stick, and eventually when you do billions of spins quantity takes over and the math hardly changes even if the simulation hits back-to-back max wins. So the simulation is reliable, just not really reflective of real gameplay since there are less variables.
I think that's pretty much it.
How all this applies to Train's usual habits:

• Every stream Train does the same thing, sit on a slot that's doing bad, spend 2M to get back 800k then it goes cold again. Wondering how it doesn't make sense. But if you remember what I said earlier, at this point he would've gone through multiple seeds already! So it actually makes perfect sense that the math in this short-term session doesn't add up. Same can work the other way around too. "Hot Fiesta seed" wasn't a seed, but multiple good ones back-to-back-to-back-to-back meaning it was a good idea to stay in it as long as it kept going.

Yeah sometimes it can turn if a slot is doing bad and you sit on it, but the wins aren't based off of previous losses. So I think Train should chase the slots that do something good, rather than chase wins on a slot that's doing bad. Sitting on slots that are eating hand you by far the biggest losses the fastest.

• Same provider is shit regardless of slot and it doesn't make sense. I think we've heard this before. But remember, slots aren't RNG. If you're playing games on the same server that's all that matters. If multiple servers are not doing well at the same time, and many of the games are re-skins and probably use similar numbers for results, it's actually pretty likely you'd get fucked on many games from the same operator.
  
• Forget common sense. If you've read this far, it's pretty clear slots are just right place at the right time. I think Train's biggest detriment is trying to make sense of everything. He's of course doing this because he's a smart guy, but If he can get rid of this mentality, pull the plug earlier if it's not working, and push it when it is, then I think he could stream a lot more.
  

That's all for me. I felt like it was worth getting this out there if it helps anyone.

I would really like to pick up a hobby that pushes me to spend more time outdoors by myself and with other people , hence looking into FPV
I recently started a new job and would like to save up for a freestyle fpv done to have fun with in my spare time and push me outside more
My budget is 300-500 dollars but I do always try aim for best value for money even if it means bumping up my budget
Would appreciate your guidance to start (I 3D CAD and 3D print for a living if that helps me in any way)
I don't know much about electronics but I'm open to learning
I asked chatGPT to give me advice and this is what it gave me:
Getting into FPV (First-Person View) drone flying can be an exciting venture. It offers a mix of technology, skill, and adrenaline, whether for recreation, professional videography, racing, or exploring new perspectives. Here’s a detailed guide to help you understand the different categories and components involved in FPV drone flying, along with their best use cases.

Categories of FPV Drones

1. Racing Drones
   
   • Description: Built for speed and agility, designed to maneuver through complex race courses.
   • Use Case: Drone racing competitions, high-speed flight practice.
   • Features: Lightweight frame, powerful motors, responsive controls.
2. Freestyle Drones
   
   • Description: Designed for acrobatic maneuvers and tricks.
   • Use Case: Performing stunts, freestyle flying, aerial acrobatics.
   • Features: Robust build, flexible flight control, durability to withstand crashes.
3. Cinematic Drones
   
   • Description: Focused on capturing high-quality video and photography.
   • Use Case: Professional videography, cinematic shots, content creation.
   • Features: Stabilized cameras, smooth flight, longer battery life.
4. Long-Range Drones
   
   • Description: Built for extended flight times and distances.
   • Use Case: Long-range exploration, mapping, search and rescue.
   • Features: High-capacity batteries, efficient motors, GPS systems.

FPV Components

1. Drones (Frames and Builds)
   
   • Frame Types:
     • 5-inch Frames: Standard for racing and freestyle.
     • 7-inch Frames: Used for long-range flights.
     • Cinewhoop Frames: Smaller, ducted frames for indoor flying and cinematic shots.
2. Flight Controllers
   
   • Purpose: The brain of the drone, managing flight stability and control.
   • Popular Models: Betaflight, KISS, INAV.
   • Features: Gyroscopes, accelerometers, firmware customization.
3. Motors and Propellers
   
   • Motors:
     • Brushless Motors: Preferred for their power and efficiency.
     • Kv Rating: Higher Kv for speed (racing), lower Kv for torque (cinematic/long-range).
   • Propellers:
     • 2-Blade: More efficient, less thrust.
     • 3-Blade: Balanced thrust and efficiency.
     • 4-Blade: Maximum thrust, less efficiency.
4. Electronic Speed Controllers (ESCs)
   
   • Purpose: Regulate power to the motors.
   • Types: BLHeli, DShot.
   • Features: Current rating, firmware options.

FPV Headsets (Goggles)

1. Analog FPV Goggles
   
   • Description: Traditional and widely used.
   • Popular Models: Fat Shark, Eachine.
   • Features: Lower latency, more budget-friendly, but lower resolution.
2. Digital FPV Goggles
   
   • Description: Newer technology with higher resolution.
   • Popular Models: DJI FPV Goggles, Fat Shark Byte Frost.
   • Features: High-definition video feed, better range, but higher cost.
3. Box Goggles
   
   • Description: Larger, more affordable option.
   • Popular Models: Eachine EV800D.
   • Features: Comfortable fit, larger screen, but bulkier.

Controllers (Transmitters)

1. Standard Transmitters
   
   • Popular Models: FrSky Taranis, Spektrum DX6.
   • Features: Reliable signal, customizable switches, telemetry feedback.
2. Compact Transmitters
   
   • Popular Models: Jumper T-Lite, TBS Tango 2.
   • Features: Portability, ease of use, modern ergonomics.

Best Combos for Different Use Cases

1. Racing Setup
   
   • Drone: 5-inch racing frame with high-Kv brushless motors.
   • Flight Controller: Betaflight.
   • ESCs: 4-in-1 ESC with DShot.
   • Goggles: Analog FPV goggles for low latency.
   • Controller: FrSky Taranis.
2. Freestyle Setup
   
   • Drone: 5-inch freestyle frame with mid-Kv motors.
   • Flight Controller: KISS.
   • ESCs: Individual ESCs with BLHeli.
   • Goggles: Analog or digital depending on preference.
   • Controller: TBS Tango 2.
3. Cinematic Setup
   
   • Drone: Cinewhoop frame with ducted props.
   • Flight Controller: INAV.
   • ESCs: Reliable 4-in-1 ESC.
   • Goggles: Digital FPV goggles for high-definition video.
   • Controller: Spektrum DX6.
4. Long-Range Setup
   
   • Drone: 7-inch frame with low-Kv motors.
   • Flight Controller: INAV with GPS.
   • ESCs: High-efficiency ESCs.
   • Goggles: Digital FPV goggles for better range.
   • Controller: Long-range transmitter like the Jumper T-Lite.

Putting It All Together

To get the best combo for your specific needs: 1. Identify Your Primary Use Case: Determine if you’re more interested in racing, freestyle, cinematography, or long-range flying. 2. Choose Compatible Components: Ensure that your drone frame, motors, ESCs, flight controller, goggles, and transmitter are all compatible and suited for your chosen use case. 3. Build and Test: Assemble your drone, calibrate the components, and perform test flights to fine-tune the settings. 4. Join the Community: Engage with FPV communities online and locally for advice, troubleshooting, and to participate in events.

Additional Tips

• Learn the Basics of Drone Assembly: Understanding how to solder, connect components, and program your flight controller is crucial.
• Practice in a Safe Environment: Start in open spaces or with simulators to build your skills without risking damage.
• Stay Updated with Firmware and Regulations: Ensure your components are running the latest firmware, and be aware of local drone flying regulations.

FPV drone flying is a dynamic and rewarding hobby that combines technology, creativity, and skill. By understanding the different categories and components, you can tailor your setup to your specific needs and enjoy the full potential of this exciting activity.

This is the transcript from the televised sit down between Conservative deputy leader and mp meneerduif and survivor of the riots on New Caledonia Micheal Jones.
Meneerduif; “I’d like to thank all the press for being here for this important sit down with my honourable guest. If you’d like to introduce yourself.”
Mr Jones; “hi, I’m Micheal Jones I’m 37 years old and I live in Manchester. Just recently I was on vacation with my girlfriend in New Caledonia. Hoping to enjoy nature and the local culture. That sadly changed when riots and violence swepped the island.”
Meneerduif; “and could you, if you don’t mind, tell us some more about how the riots impacted you?”
Mr Jones; “we were afraid for our lives. We were unsure if we could safely leave the hotel and who we’d need to contact to get help. The people sleeping in the hotel room next to us were evacuated by their own government but our government did nothing for us. It almost seemed like they didn’t care or forgot about us.”
Meneerduif; “thankfully you are now safely with us. Could you tell us some more about what happend after the riots started and how you left the island?”
Mr Jones; “when the riots started we could no longer leave the island since the main road between our hotel and the airport had been blocked. So we are still very grateful for the French authorities ability to reopen this road. We then made our way to the airport we’re we managed to convince a member of the Australian airforce on letting us on one of the evacuation flights. Even tough our government had not worked with the Australian government on those flights. After we arrived in Australia we had to fend for ourselves on how we got home from there.”
Meneerduif; “showing us once again that we can rely on our Australian allies, even more then on our own government. I must imagine that all of this must have an impact on you.”
Mr Jones; “yeah, it has really impacted me and my girlfriend. My girlfriend still has nights that she can barely sleep. Or if we hear kids lighting fireworks or another loud noise she’ll become really stressed. We also used to be real adventurers on vacation, exploring new cultures and countries. But now we plan on staying a bit closer to home where we are more certain that we can stay safe.”
Meneerduif; “it’s saddens me that the inaction of the government has had such big consequences for you. It really shows me how solidarity has no longer got the energy to govern.”
Mr Jones; “exactly, this whole affair has also influenced my voting intentions. I used to be someone who would read up on what all party’s wanted during the next term and what the government had done during the last term, but seeing how you have been the only one supporting me and the others trapped on the island has made me into a solid Conservative voter.”
Meneerduif; “thank you for that, all I did was my job as an mp of holding the government accountable when they would not act. I hope more voters learn from this debacle from the foreign secretary and see that the Conservative Party is the right choice.”
“With that I’d like to thank you mr Jones for being here and sharing your story and all the press for being here.”

First Prev Next Patreon Ko-fi Discord
PRs: u/anakist & u/BroDogIsMyName
- - - - -
It had been a few weeks since Altier was brought to the run-down shack that his black-scaled companion likely called home, and he could now comfortably say he was accustomed to the…household’s routine. The kobold typically left at the crack of dawn, returned a little after noon, and occasionally left again to forage until nightfall. When the weather was bad or there wasn’t a particular need for something, they half-heartedly chased their rabbit around for a bit, which usually ended with a bout of quiet petting while everyone got ready for the night. It was always amusing to see the energetic side of what he had come to know as a relatively lazy loaf of an animal. As for the routine of the ferrorabbit in question… Well…it was at least more interesting than expected.
Hoppit would begin his own series of activities as soon as his caretaker left—the first of which being a check of every nook and cranny in the shed. He sniffed at anything that caught his interest, varying from morning to morning, but he gave every object or corner its due attention. Once he was satisfied with that, he would eat some of the ragged plants that made up most of his diet, take a drink from his bowl, then jump onto the tro— table and plop himself down, his ears pivoting towards the door. It was hard to say if the lounging spot had been established before Altier’s arrival, but it was somewhat amusing to pretend that the little rabbit was standing guard over his core—if it wasn’t for one particular part of the morning ritual, that is.
Indeed, the ferrorabbit had a habit of licking the obsidian orb that sat in the middle of the room, which thankfully didn’t seem to perturb the system enough to give Altier a headache. He was confused when it first happened, but it was commonplace enough now that he barely acknowledged it. A part of him liked that he was getting attention as a core, even if it was delivered via a strange grooming method. The closest he got to being acknowledged as something other than ‘the dungeon’ was through an unfortunate misunderstanding that he could never properly rectify. He supposed that was hardly worth thinking about now, though; too much time had passed for there to be anyone left to correct. The little oddity of his mornings would have to suffice.
There wasn’t much to comment on as far as the rest of the day’s happenings. Hoppit would end his loafing by shaking his head and ears in a way that filled the silence with soft clacks, give the core a customary tongue bath, then jump off the table to nose his way out of the shed through a hole that was hidden by the storage cart against the wall. Where the rabbit went was anyone’s guess, but he always returned before anyone noticed he was gone, and often did so while covered in small cuts and scratches. Any blood from the lacerations was quickly licked off before it could be seen by the kobold, and in the event that the scaly caretaker happened to return earlier than expected, Hoppit would scurry over to the bundles of blankets to finish the cleanup in secret.
Today looked to be following the usual pattern. The kobold left bright and early with various gardening tools and a wooden pail, and Hoppit had since set off into the great unknown for one reason or another. Hopefully, he returned less injured than usual. It was frustrating to admit that Altier had begun to grow rather fond of the fluffy creature, and seeing the thing come back hurt was bothersome. Was it off looking for food? There wasn’t a whole lot given to it, so that was a possibility, and it could be getting into fights over whatever it found. That still didn’t explain why the animal was so thin, and Altier didn’t have enough to go off of to think of a potential solution. He wanted to help it in some way, like by summoning a creature to act as an escort, or maybe just by manifesting something edible like he once could. No, he could only stare at the ‘Synchronizing…’ that occupied his menu, wishing he had more information to work with.
He never thought he would miss the bombardment of notifications and their lingering presence that filled the edge of his mental vision; at least with that he could surmise enough to hazard some kind of action. Even knowing why the menu was acting the way it did would be a start. Yet, try as he might, there wasn’t a history for him to reference anymore, and he had nothing to work with. He was confident the last message had asked him to ‘accept’ something, then took his befuddled ponderance as an answer, but he was no closer to an explanation for what it wanted, nor why it prompted him in the first place. He just didn’t have another experience to compare against, since nothing like that had ever happened before. Not that he was ever in much of a position to allow it.
The entire purpose of having Altier inhabit a core was for him to become a dungeon of Decay, which entailed all the skeletons, poisons, acids, and whatever else came to mind when one pictured the concept. ‘Living’ creatures were something he only had the chance to experiment with near the beginning of his new existence, though he never dabbled past the first few insects before transitioning to the mindless undead. Having a thinking, feeling, breathing entity touch his core was a rite reserved only for the adventurers and soldiers that bested his trials, and that was usually a painful experience. Now, he had spent what he could only guess was hours being held by a kobold, followed by having a rabbit bump against him, and neither felt like what he came to expect. Instead, both had led to a completely novel reaction from the system. The strange circumstances put him at a bit of a loss as to what it all meant for him.
Sure, he could dismiss the deluge of errors from his companion’s involvement by pointing to the numerous ‘corrupted’ messages before it, and Hoppit was a part of mostly unexplored territory, but the lack of clarity nagged at the back of his mind constantly. Being exposed to activity after potential decades or centuries of unchanging solitude made him despise the informational dead end. If he couldn’t make sense of the rabbit’s circumstances, then he didn’t have much hope of deciphering the reason for why his system was misbehaving so terribly. He also didn't know much about the one who owned the decrepit holdings he was housed inside.
He still wasn’t sure what drove the kobold to take him from the cave. His suspicion of becoming traded goods fell flat after the first week or so, and he hadn’t noticed any cult-like behaviour, which was promising. Granted, a lack of nefarious behaviour didn’t mean there was a lack of nefarious intent, but he didn’t get the impression his companion held that either. The kobold itself didn’t seem quite settled on an opinion of his core, though it was up for debate if the hesitation was due to knowing what he was or not. They seemed to mull something over before bed each night, yet never reached a satisfactory conclusion, staring at the obsidian orb through weary grey eyes until they eventually forced themselves into sleep.
Whatever the underlying reasoning for his abduction was, he had observed enough to know that the kobold didn’t deserve to live in destitution. As beaten as the shed might be, they cared for it as best they could, and did so without a single groan or grimace of complaint. The floors were cleaned with a tattered rag and fresh water, dust was removed regularly, and any stray mess that Hoppit made was dealt with promptly. They even took the time to wipe off his core, which was possibly where the ferrorabbit got the idea to start licking him. The only time Altier had seen discontent from the kobold was when they didn’t find much during their foraging, and thus couldn’t give any treats to the excited and bouncy herbivore.
He wasn’t aware that a creature’s face could make such a painfully broken expression, and he was quick to decide that he never wanted to see it again.
Vexingly, his metaphorical hands were tied; a dungeon could only influence their Domain, and given the state of his system, not even that option was available to him. All he could do was glare at the rotting wooden beams that held up the roof and remember when such an issue didn’t exist. It would have taken a mere flicker of thought and a paltry sum of mana to mend the struts when he was a proper dungeon. He could even outright reinforce the structure by weaving in other materials, leaving the appearance as it was while making everything stronger than iron. Well, he once could. Working with other affinities was something that came to him after absorbing the coloured motes left behind by adventurers, and the accursed stone that stole his mana had taken that ability as well.
An attempt was made anyway, his will ordering the deteriorated wood to absorb any trace metals from the ground, but it was no use. He couldn’t feel the iron or stones beneath the shed like he would have been able to before, all but confirming his suspicion that his connection to the Earth element had slipped away. Nature was much the same; the only way he knew when Hoppit had returned most days was from the subtle noise and the essence of injury. The other attributes—Air, Flame, Luma, Shadow, and so on—were ones he never experimented with to any real extent, so it was less noticeable when he lost his grasp on them. Perhaps they faded early. Either way, all he had left was a waning cognizance of his own alignment, and that wasn’t of much use to him. If he had any appreciable mana income, then perhaps he could do something, but he wasn’t even sure what the upkeep of his current Domain might be. It was entirely possible that he was running on a deficit, which would offer a reason for why his system had been so—
[Do#$@n Ex@#d$%^&d! CRe@#r H-H-H-HoPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP—]
[Errrrrrr—]
[Sy$%^hroni%^$zing…]
[Creeee-tu— Hoppit ha@$ esttttb-hed terrrrrrr-ity f^#% t$e dun@&$n!]
- - - - -
“Well then,” he mumbled to himself, taking in the strange scene behind the shed. For one, he could actually view a small distance beyond the structure now, and two, there was a rather proud-looking Hoppit sitting on his haunches before a pair of significantly less prideful examples of the species. They looked quite a bit bigger than the lazy loaf Altier had come to know, yet they were more cut up and dejected than his furry friend. That answered where the injuries had been coming from, he supposed. Hoppit was probably running off to bash heads with whatever animal population existed here beforehand, and they had only just reached a consensus on who was in charge. Impressive.
One of Hoppit’s ears turned back towards the shed, his head following suit as he gave a lagomorph’s approximation of a ‘Look what I did!’ smile. Altier blanked out mentally, but didn’t have time to question anything before the new leader of the local rabbits imperiously pointed a paw towards the surrounding forest, which was equally surreal to witness. Most surprising of all, the…subordinates? The other ferrorabbits did as commanded, keeping their forms small as they took off into the foliage. Soft clacks came from Hoppit’s pleased shake of his head, then he too left the area with only a slightly lopsided bounce to his stride.
The man-turned-core could only gape at what he saw. Were animals always so…expressive? Had Hoppit heard him? What in the world was happening? Why had Hoppit’s personal conquest led to Altier’s Domain expanding?
He lamented not having fingers, nor temples to rub with them. His system was a garbled mess of errors and inconsistent messages, his residence was falling apart at the seams, his companion was someone who abducted him from the dungeon, yet never did anything past that, and his first real experience with an animal was turning out to be more confusing than he thought possible.
All of this was after an unknown amount of time spent commanding legions of undead to strengthen the very people who he would later learn had lied to and manipulated him, making him into a nightmarish entity just to bolster the power of their forces. He almost missed the days spent gazing out of a mossy window. At least then he knew what to expect.
Nothing made sense anymore.
= = = = =
The soft sound of roots ripping free from soil suddenly stopped, only to be followed by a dull thud of Ceele’s palm slapping against the ground to catch her fall before she landed on her rear. She righted herself with her tail and tossed the stubborn weed into a pile with the others. No matter how many mornings she did this, they always seemed to replace themselves faster than she could remove the pesky things. A sigh slipped from her muzzle as she set about grabbing the next one embedded in the vegetable garden.
Aches and spreading stiffness flared up, but went ignored as she neared the end of her duties, though she was well aware that they would come back with force once she tried to settle down for the day. The impending soreness was an inevitable byproduct of spending so much time working. Still, she knew that if it wasn’t for the kindly old couple that allowed her to call their shed home, she would still be sleeping beneath the stars while making sure nothing tried to get at her Hoppit. Even if it was just a part of the deal, they were owed this much in return, and she would see it done properly.
The sun bore down on her back as she did her usual tasks, which was a departure from the slightly overcast weather as of late. It looked somewhat promising when she checked in the wee hours of the morning, yet as her gardening duties dragged on, so too did the intensity of such a clear sky. A disappointed glance at the empty wooden bucket on the edge of the field was quickly corrected. She hadn’t thought to refill it at the river after watering the crops, and her parched throat was making its protests known, while also reminding her that there wasn’t much water left at home either. One more thing to take care of when she was done.
A gruff cough brought her attention towards the old kobold resting his back against a tree some distance away, safely shaded from the unforgiving rays beaming down. Her displeasure at having yet more to do was hastily wiped away. She was undecided on what to think of the detached audience, but looking so sour while upholding her side of the agreement wouldn’t reflect well on her. Hopefully, he hadn’t seen it. Not that she could tell if he did; he always had the same expression when he watched her work. The elder kobold’s arms were crossed, a finger tapping absently against his bicep, while his tail sat motionless on the grass, the muddy red colour of his scales standing out amongst the greens and browns. ‘Makis,’ was his name, assuming her memory served.
Makis had taken to observing her every so often, usually propping himself against this or that at a distance, the unwavering scowl being as unnerving as it was belying of his age. Somewhat loose skin sagged a bit around his jowls and neck, yet the rest of his face was still taut from how much time he spent examining red-hot metal, and his arms were marred with countless burns and cuts from his profession. He held an oppressive aura, though the crinkles around his eyes and muzzle suggested he smiled as frequently as he glowered, even if Ceele was yet to see the former. There was only the same judgmental expression aimed at her when he was around. She could only hope that he didn’t take offence to some unintended slight, but she didn’t know him well enough to say what might be considered one.
They hadn’t spoken since she took up residence on the outskirts of his land. His wife was the one to introduce them, but it was quickly established that he had no intention of being a chatty individual. He led Ceele to the shed hidden amongst the trees on the edge of the property, then dismissed her with only a grunt coming from the elderly kobold. She supposed that it was for the best. Her experience in socializing was centred around convincing others to employ her, and there hadn’t been much of an opportunity to expand her horizons while living a life on the road. If that had been the end of their interactions, she would have swiftly written the terseness off, but he appeared every few days, taking up residence beneath the shade as he watched her work, never speaking a single word. At least he didn’t openly protest her presence, yet she figured that would be easier to manage. He wouldn’t be such an enigma then.
There wasn’t a whole lot she knew about him besides his penchant for ‘supervision,’ and anything beyond that was what his wife had volunteered during the rare opportunity they had to chat. She was told that Makis worked the smithy out front, and although he had retired from doing so in an official capacity, she could still regularly hear his hammer as she tended to the garden, so she figured he kept himself busy most days. It made her wonder what was so interesting about a vagrant like herself, but when there was so little else to do, she could see how anything could be made worth the attention. It was just him and his wife living in the once bustling home, after all; the couple’s children had long since grown up and made families of their own.
She noticed his gaze shift elsewhere as she tugged yet another stubborn intruder from the soil, his arms falling from across his chest and the perpetually worn displeasure melting to that of curiosity. He wandered off shortly after, and she had to make an effort not to fall onto her tail as the pressure on her shoulders unexpectedly evaporated. Did something happen?
Ceele shook her head free of the distracting thought. It wasn’t her business if he grew bored with watching her work. As long as no one voiced any complaints, she could only assume that she was doing a satisfactory job. Maybe he finally decided that he didn’t need to be so watchful because she was doing well! That could be it, right?
A glance at the somewhat sloppily maintained garden erased the false confidence from her face, but she was just as quick to focus on finishing up, unwilling to allow darker musings to fester. Thankfully, there didn’t seem to be anything else that needed her intervention. The weeds were all uprooted, the soil was appropriately dampened, and her check for pesky insects or wildlife turned up nothing to worry about. She was free for the rest of the day!
…Or she would be free—as soon as she finished the last of her tasks, anyway.
The black-scaled kobold got up from her crouch unsteadily, shivering and wincing from the pins and needles in her legs. She would have to remember to stretch more often; it was far too easy to forgo that kind of thing just to make the overall work go slightly faster. Her hand reached out to grab the pile of weeds and put them into the bucket as she ran through what needed to be done before she could properly relax. Hoppit’s food needed to be washed, she needed to bathe, and they were running low on water anyway, so she would have to visit the river. Just the thought of dragging herself into the forest again made her muscles protest, but she wouldn’t have the energy to do it later. She forced the smile that had started to fall and took the first of many steps.
- - - - -
The river wasn’t too far away, only taking a few minutes of traipsing through the dense woodlands until she reached her destination. It was an idyllic little spot. The trees thinned out to allow a grassy bank along the water, and there was an appreciably gentle slope from shallows to depths, making for a convenient place to take care of various needs. She had discovered this place during her travels, and it was where a kind older woman found her.
Ceele was washing off at the time, with Hoppit safely taking shelter from the outside underneath the bundled blankets while he waited. The trickle of the stream brushing against rocks covered the sound of footsteps, so she was rather surprised when an aged voice called out to ask if she was okay. Her first reaction was to distance herself and apologize—the why didn’t matter, but she had learned that most people were more lenient of her presence if she seemed apologetic for it, and she usually was. The elderly kobold just laughed at her scrambling, tacking on an assurance that there was no need for modesty. The woman was blind, apparently, which explained how Ceele’s blackened colours hadn’t deterred her.
Strangely enough, there was a comforting sense of ease around the one who introduced herself as Hira. It was a sort of presence that Ceele could only vaguely remember, and it drew her close enough to speak as she finished bathing. The conversation wasn’t anything profound, of course—they hardly delved deeper than surface-level small talk—but Hira lost her smile as she listened to the younger kobold. By the end of it, the old woman posed a series of questions with a dark inflection to her voice, and Ceele struggled to find an answer.
‘Are you tired of looking for something that only slips away? Are you tired of running? Do you really want to be scared and alone?’
If the silence bothered Hira, then it didn’t show. She had simply held out a hand and offered Ceele a way of life that didn’t involve wondering where she would be spending the night, nor entailed cowering in the brush while fearsome predators roamed freely. It would be a simple existence of few fortunes, but it was safe, and it was honest. All she had to do was say yes.
Ceele denied it at first, partially because she knew most people despised Hobbit's species, and partially because she couldn’t shake the offer being too good to be true. Hira was quick to propose a compromise; Ceele could take residence in the gardening shed that had fallen from use, and to satiate the nagging sense of an unfair deal, she would be put in charge of maintaining the garden itself. All Hira wanted was to ‘see’ her favourite space bloom again, since she couldn’t take care of it anymore. The black-scaled kobold stared longingly at where Hoppit was, his little body shivering from the prolonged cold and fear that he would be hurt if he left the blankets hiding him. It was with a heavy guilt that she accepted Hira’s offer, keeping quiet about her true reason for doing so.
That was in the past, however, though she thought about it every time she stopped by and saw the smooth rocks where she and Hira first met. Eventually, she might gather the courage to admit that she was housing a ‘pest’ and beg for forgiveness. Until then, she would just work her hardest to prove it wasn’t a mistake to give her a home. That her endless efforts weren’t meaningless. That Hoppit deserved to be more than a ‘pest.’
That Ceele was more than something she had no control over being.
She cleared her head a bit and started on the reason she came all this way. Her dress was rather easy to wash in the meandering water, and the trees provided a suitable place for it to dry in the sunlight and light breeze. The weeds were fine with a thorough rinse near in the shallows, but taking care of her own hygiene required her to wade farther in, though it only came up to her chest in the middle of the rill. Still, she could scrub off the soil and grime, which was all she really needed. Perhaps some simple soaps would help rid her of the pervasive black that stained her skin and scales, but that was beyond her meagre means for the time being, as well as being mere wishful thinking.
She worked past the dreary mindset that settled in when she allowed it, focusing on how serene the river was. The soft birdsong from the trees helped make for a peaceful experience, and she could feel the somewhat chilled liquid basically pour into the aches and pains throughout her body, washing away the stiffness from spending so long under the unerring sun. It was nice to escape reality and let thoughts drift while held buoyant by calmer waters.
Yet the bliss was short-lived. Even if winter was gone, spring was still far from warming the waters enough for her to laze about for too long. She dragged herself from the soft current and fetched her dress from the low-lying branch she left it to dry on. It was still a touch damp, but it wasn’t anything a bit of time in front of the fireplace wouldn’t fix.
Ceele was only a short distance away from home when she heard a gravelly male voice, but it was the flicker of sight between the trees that made her drop what was in her arms and lunge into a sprint.
Makis stood just outside the gardening shed, a ferrorabbit held at arm’s length by rusty crimson hands placed on the scruff and haunch, the rabbit’s little ears flattened as fear filled its tiny face. Her eyes widened further when she noticed the small stains of blood in his light brown fur. They found out about him. Ephemeral claws of blackness clutched at her soul, ripping the very fabric she was made of as an unseen beast smiled, eager to take yet one more thing from her. Her Hoppit. Her baby. Her everything.
“Hoppit!” she shrieked, her words all but tearing out of her throat in desperation. Frozen blood coursed through her veins, yet poured into exhausted limbs. She broke through the treeline with no regard for the branches slashing against her flesh, panic making each sting fade before it could be processed. The grizzled glare of the older kobold snapped towards her, his usual scowl picking up an actual air of intensity that she never thought could be absent, the promise of violence lurking in his eyes. She skidded to a stop a few paces away, the lump in her throat threatening to clog her airway. “S-stop hurting him!”
“Didn’t,” he barked back, his tone even yet firm. “Cuts ain’t me. I’d’a done worse if’a had ta mind ta.”
The blatant declaration snapped her from blind panic, although his apparent anger didn’t do her fear any favours. “B-but… Then how…”
“‘Hoppit.’ Named it, did’cha?” he grunted, ignoring her confusion and bobbing the rabbit to get her attention again. His gaze shifted back to the animal, the flames of ire cooling slightly. “I was wonderin’ why yer plots ain’t dead yet. Suppose this critter’s why.”
One of her hands hesitantly reached out until she pulled it back, while the other clutched at her chest to stop her heart from hammering against her ribs. She couldn’t act rashly. Not while her baby was in his arms. “I—”
“Soft thing, ain’t it,” the elder kobold commented curiously, cutting her off.
“Y-yes?” she returned reluctantly, struggling to stop herself from lashing out to reclaim the ferrorabbit in his grasp.
“Like fine silk.” Makis tipped and tilted the animal, inspecting this and that with a deep-seated frown, all while Hoppit silently looked to her for help. The pit in her stomach grew. She needed to get him back, but how?
Ceele swallowed the dense dread as she tried to formulate some sort of plan, stumbling over her words and forced smile. “I-it’s nice! Isn’t it nice?”
His eyes snapped back to burrow into her own with hatred. “Wasn’t a compliment, girly.”
“B-but you—”
He released Hoppit’s lower half to jab a claw at the various spikes around his body, plying them with minimal force. “Look. See this? These’r suppose ta break bone. ‘Specially when he’s stiff like this. Ain’t no way I should be able ta bend ‘em. He’s barely more than a walkin’ carcass—all skin ‘n stick. He’s gonna get picked up by a wandering pecker if he keeps pissin’ about out ‘ere. It’s a wonder he’s still kickin’. What’cha feeding ‘em?” His gaze dropped from her face to the rest of her, disgust curling his muzzle into a snarl. “N’ver mind. I can guess.”
She felt the dampness build at the edges of her vision, unprepared to not only worry for Hoppit's immediate health, but also to face such harsh criticism while she was so vulnerable. “I… I try to make sure he has…”
Makis crouched to release the ferrorabbit onto the ground, Ceele dropping to her knees the moment he did. The terrified lagomorph wasted no time, bolting towards his adoptive mother and leaping into her arms, shaking uncontrollably. The rust-coloured ‘bold stared as she started soothingly stroking the animal’s back.
“Yer given’ em the weeds, aren’t ya?” he stated rather than asked. She gave a teary nod when her voice wouldn’t respond for her. The old kobold drew a breath, letting it go in an exasperated sigh as he stood back up, his expression becoming more impatient than antagonistic. “What else?”
“I— Um…”
“What. Else?”
“W-whatever I c-can find!” she sputtered out. Hoppit tried to hide against her neck, prompting her to tighten her hold. She couldn’t stop herself from shrinking, the guilt and confusion pulling her head down. “R-roots, vegetables, fruits… I give them as often as I can.”
His glare continued unimpeded, his cadence cold. “That it?”
There were a million things Ceele wanted to say. A part of her wanted to beg him not to kick them out of the first safe place she had in longer than she could remember, but she couldn’t find the words. She wanted to deny the judgmental tone that stabbed into her insecurity surrounding how good of a job she was doing with Hoppit, but the deadened void in her chest swallowed her pride whole. She knew he was right to critique her. That she was failing in the only thing that mattered anymore. That the feeling of loss would return.
“I try,” she whispered through the beginnings of a sob. “I try to find more, but he needs someone around, and I have to work the garden, so there’s only so much time I can spend looking. He won’t even eat all of what I bring back…” Tears dripped off her cheeks as she aimed a desolate smile at her furry friend. “He wants to make sure I have some too.”
“Yer killin’ em,” Makis pointed out plainly, crossing his arms. “He’ll be dead ‘fore the summer at this rate.”
“I know!” she shouted, forcing back the memories of insidious murmurs that lurked in the back of her mind, eager to creep into her ears again. The hate-filled stares that followed her, the rumours that arrived in towns before she had the chance to make an impression, and the guilt that loomed over her like an executioner's axe… “I know I am… I just… I don’t know what he needs. I don’t know how to make him happy…but I try. I’m trying…”
“…Yer an idiot, girly.”
She looked up to see the elder kobold walking away without another word. Her eyes fell to Hoppit, the ferrorabbit pressing himself against her as much as he could. He was small, thin, soft, and growing weaker by the day, but he never let it keep him down for long. No, he always showed his best for her, giving her joy that wasn’t provided anywhere else. She saw the thin cuts and dried blood, though she didn’t know where they came from, nor how he got out of the shed in the first place. But that was okay. Hoppit was okay, and she had Hoppit, so everything was okay, right?
…But how much longer would everything stay okay? How much longer until her efforts weren’t enough, and she was left desperately reaching for fading memories of what once was? How much longer until she killed her baby too?
How much longer until she was alone again?
Soft footsteps drew near, pulling her from the spiralling thoughts that threatened to gnaw at her soul. Damp, blurry eyes fell on Makis returning with a small wooden crate, the older kobold stopping a few steps away. He dropped the box, a deep, rattling thud produced as it impacted the ground, making Hoppit flinch in her arms. Ceele blinked as she kept him calm, then blinked again, looking up at the man for answers.
“The name, girly,” he spat in irritation. “Ferrorabbit. Ther’ Earth aligned creatures; they need metals. They don’t care where they get it, but they need lots of it. Iron, copper, tin, lead—raw crystal, if they can find it. You name it, they’ll take a chunk out of it. It's why they bother farmers so much; the best soil’s usually top’a gem deposits, ‘n the little bastards have no issue burrowing deep to get it. Dries up the element’s energy ‘n makes the crops weak.”
Ceele’s mouth opened and closed, each unsuccessful attempt to speak making her feel smaller and smaller. More and more lost. Why was he telling her this? How did he know? What was in the—
He kicked the crate with the side of his foot. “Scraps. Don’t’cha look at me like that. I’m a smith, girly. I might be old and retired, but I still work a forge. Now, this ain’t anything pure—it’s just slag and hunks—but I’m sure the critter won’t mind. Your little gardenin’ project pays off, ‘n I’ll see which of my contacts can get in some better ore.”
She ripped her eyes away from the box and met the perpetual scowl of the old kobold, seeing a warmth behind the hostility that she had never noticed before. “…Why?”
He scoffed in amusement, which looked somewhat menacing on such a hardened expression. “Yer a touch stupid, girly, but the missus adores ya, ‘n yer a good worker.” A shadow of a smile formed on his face. “Hira spent more evenings asking ‘bout how the plots are doin’ than I got time in the day. She’d bite my head off if I noticed a critter like that sufferin’ and didn’t lend a hand. ‘Specially when it’s obvious you ain’t tryin’ ta hurt the thing.”
“B-but the garden… Isn’t he a problem?”
Makis rolled his eyes, turning with a dismissive wave of his hand. “If he was, he’da killed it by now. I’d say he’s been keepin’ the others clear ‘n got scratched up for the trouble. That’s more reason to feed ‘em right in my eyes; pay the poor bastard his dues.” He paused after a few steps, shooting her one last incredulous glance. “‘N the rabbit’s right. You’re not much better off than he is. Eat. Before the missus takes my head, preferably. I ain’t need ta hear her worryin’ over you more than I already do.”
And with that, he walked off back to the house, leaving Ceele to sit stunned on the ground with Hoppit quietly nuzzling into her.
“Hoppit…?”
The ferrorabbit perked an ear and gently licked her collar. Fresh tears ran rivulets down her face, yet they didn’t weigh her down. They felt freeing. She adjusted her hold on the rabbit and held him out, taking in the small cuts and numerous other injuries she had never noticed before. He stared back at her with worried eyes.
“You’ve been busy, huh?” she cooed quietly, doing her best to keep her voice from cracking. He shrunk in her hands. “I told you to stay home, baby. What if something happened to you? I wouldn’t know where you went, and…”
Her protests died out as she saw what was unmistakably guilt on his little face. She brought him back to her chest and cleared her throat.
“It’s alright, Hoppit. If… If you want to help momma, then we can work together, okay? Just…please don’t go off getting hurt… I don’t know what I’d do without you…” The rabbit didn’t reply, and she was pretty sure she had never heard him make any sounds that weren’t his happy little ear clacks, but she chose to interpret the nuzzling as an agreement. “Such a smart boy…”
She took a breath and wiped off the excess moisture from her cheeks, setting Hoppit down on the ground. “Let’s bring Mr. Makis’ gift in, and then I need to go get more water so we can clean you up, okay?”
He bounced his way to the door of their home, waiting patiently for her to lug the surprisingly heavy crate into the shed. He was even still behaving himself by the time she returned from picking up the things she dropped in her haste. There wasn’t a single protest from the ferrorabbit as she washed over his wounds with warm water, nor when she asked him to wait as she cut up a small salad for him using an extra portion of her rationed vegetables. Finally, once everything else was gone, she tentatively sifted through the box until she found a chunk of something that didn’t look so sharp, then offered it to Hoppit skeptically.
As startling as it was to see him bite through metal without issue, she couldn’t help but tear up again at how pleased he looked with the bizarre addition to his diet. He munched through the first piece, then stared at the box while pawing at the air, asking for more. She obliged through wet laughs, feeling lighter than she had since he first gazed at her from his burrow, alone and afraid, just like she was.
Her little baby was happy, and that made it okay.
Next
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A/N: Thank you to my Patrons, new and returning! No Thanks, Emmanuel, and Megathor join the others who get to read 1 chap ahead!

So the story goes like this: My ex best friend F31 asked me F23 to come stay with her because she lives closer to where we had our internship although i had my space well equipped .and i did , and during that time i was going with my bfM32 from back then, things went wrong we broke up and i wanted to recover my belongings from his space , he didn't care even after many times s i asked him ,so one day he did agree ro bring em to me and i was having a walk by the beach with my exfriend , he came drunk and his friend was drunk,and before we knew that we had to get in the car because he was in the middle of the road, my ex friend nd had to call her dude M32 to come save us from this weird situation before we get SAed . He came and kept on asking me about the dude and i was very responsive because i felt like he hd the right to know since he saved us . He drove us back at her place i thanked him and he and went first to let them have a private convo . 5minutes later she joined me saying that he had something to do and he went . And for the records this guy is her ex . She already has a bf that lives thats was back then in a different country so it was our only option . The next 2 days , he kept asking her about me alot like crazy and she only mentioned that without telling me her responses. And i didn't give it much thoughts because she was my friend and i trusted her . Afew days later we got an invitation to an event 3 hours away from our city and we (girls) didn't feel safe to go alone so we thought we should bring with us someone(a guy) from the same field to keep an eye on us and it was my suggestion to call him since he was very protective and handled the situation well he seemed decent and worked where we had the internship. She talked to him(via messages ) and didn't wanna sound desperate trying to find reasons to call so she asked me to him -she said that i wanted to tell him something i talked to him(in a call) in front of her told him exactly just about the event and she took the phone went to the kitchen and finished talking . She came back saying he said he will see his shifts and will let us know asap . Again she said i dont want him texting me ,i already took his consent to share his number . Send him a message to tell him it's u so he will let u know if he is going or not . That conversation happened but it didn't end there he kept having a conversation about random stuff while my ex friend had access to the conversation and told me what to answer sometimes, at a certain level she said from now on i don't wanna know your conversation anymore yall seem very compatible and im just gonna tell u (me) this from a friend to another , he is a bad person manipulator ...telling me all the bad things he is , and that she's only warning me because im her friend and she cares about me. I was like girl do u have feelings for him and she went like no im just scared for you he knows how to talk . I had this conversation with her 10 times exactly and each and every time she was like know to me he is trash knowing that she is already with someone.
Now is where the weird behavior started , she started talking less with me , avoiding eye contact but she has always had a similar phase where she just hates u for no reason so i was like it must be it ignored her behavior until one day i told her that i wanted to check on my house it has been more than a month and i decided to sleep at my place ,texted her the morning im on my way to your house so we can go together to work like we do every day and she was like didn't sleep at my place just go without me . I did and then she started telling me about an aunt and how she met her cousins and stuff and she had fun while i know she has no aunt in the city ,i didn't wanna go hard on her and acted like i believed ed it . After we finished the shift i asked her about going to her place to recover some papers i had there and again she was like im going to have lunch with my aunt ,im not gonna be at home but ill be that at this hour if you want to come pick the things you need , i understood that she no longer wanted me there but maybe it's because of her room mates maybe she is running low on money maybe she just want some alone time although i wasn't intending to stay this long at her place she begged me every single le time to stay and not go and that i had nothing to fo there alone , i passed by a day later to take some of my stuff i couldn't nt take everything ng because i dont have a car and thanked her for her hospitality and left . During all of this time i was still talking to the dude very casually until ill one day he was like don't disappear for a long period of time and from that day on we had a continuous conversation but still very decent . Until one day we have met and he was like i can sense that we are not going to be just friend but u (me) keep lying to urself, nothing happened but we did agree that being friend is not enough for how much we are compatible in an implicit way nothing was directly said . I kept my relationship with her very normal when i met her at work because im not a fan of drama at work but she is so the next thing after kicking me out of her house is causing me problems with the supervisor complaining to him about how i just waste time and dont work and when i confronted her about it was all manipulative answers like u shouldn't have this much of a reaction don't raise your hands while talking i just left the argument because i didn't t wanna cause a scene at work .
Things with the dude are going slow and healthy she was right about some stuff but the majority was wrong not that it didn't happen between thembut because they didn't match it was always them fighting over the tiniest details .
Later on the dude started asking me about when did my parents get divorced and my financial crisis thing thats were never mentioned before in front on of me and no one took my consent to share -so basically she was telling everyone at work , him and her roommates that i was going through tough times and that i had to stay with her because she is helping me financially- and speaking about my parents they have divorced when i was 2 i was used to having my mom only and she did a great job providing like he didn't even have a space im my memory or my brain idk why she decided to mention that and make me look petty . She has also said that im in a huge fight with my older sister which is not true . I had to explain everything to the dude Also he asked me about how i feel now that we are going out out together knowing that she was my friend and stuff i also explained to him how i talked to her about this and how does she feel ,and he interrupted me saying we have only met a couple of times in the car we never went in a date. she is not my ex and it could be possible that she has feeling for me.
Me and the dude are having a stable relationship rn and idk how to feel about it please give ne ur analysis of this situation !

So the story goes like this: My ex best friend F31 asked me F23 to come stay with her because she lives closer to where we had our internship although i had my space well equipped .and i did , and during that time i was going with my bfM32 from back then, things went wrong we broke up and i wanted to recover my belongings from his space , he didn't care even after many times s i asked him ,so one day he did agree ro bring em to me and i was having a walk by the beach with my exfriend , he came drunk and his friend was drunk,and before we knew that we had to get in the car because he was in the middle of the road, my ex friend nd had to call her dude M32 to come save us from this weird situation before we get SAed . He came and kept on asking me about the dude and i was very responsive because i felt like he hd the right to know since he saved us . He drove us back at her place i thanked him and he and went first to let them have a private convo . 5minutes later she joined me saying that he had something to do and he went . And for the records this guy is her ex . She already has a bf that lives thats was back then in a different country so it was our only option . The next 2 days , he kept asking her about me alot like crazy and she only mentioned that without telling me her responses. And i didn't give it much thoughts because she was my friend and i trusted her . Afew days later we got an invitation to an event 3 hours away from our city and we (girls) didn't feel safe to go alone so we thought we should bring with us someone(a guy) from the same field to keep an eye on us and it was my suggestion to call him since he was very protective and handled the situation well he seemed decent and worked where we had the internship. She talked to him(via messages ) and didn't wanna sound desperate trying to find reasons to call so she asked me to him -she said that i wanted to tell him something i talked to him(in a call) in front of her told him exactly just about the event and she took the phone went to the kitchen and finished talking . She came back saying he said he will see his shifts and will let us know asap . Again she said i dont want him texting me ,i already took his consent to share his number . Send him a message to tell him it's u so he will let u know if he is going or not . That conversation happened but it didn't end there he kept having a conversation about random stuff while my ex friend had access to the conversation and told me what to answer sometimes, at a certain level she said from now on i don't wanna know your conversation anymore yall seem very compatible and im just gonna tell u (me) this from a friend to another , he is a bad person manipulator ...telling me all the bad things he is , and that she's only warning me because im her friend and she cares about me. I was like girl do u have feelings for him and she went like no im just scared for you he knows how to talk . I had this conversation with her 10 times exactly and each and every time she was like know to me he is trash knowing that she is already with someone.
Now is where the weird behavior started , she started talking less with me , avoiding eye contact but she has always had a similar phase where she just hates u for no reason so i was like it must be it ignored her behavior until one day i told her that i wanted to check on my house it has been more than a month and i decided to sleep at my place ,texted her the morning im on my way to your house so we can go together to work like we do every day and she was like didn't sleep at my place just go without me . I did and then she started telling me about an aunt and how she met her cousins and stuff and she had fun while i know she has no aunt in the city ,i didn't wanna go hard on her and acted like i believed ed it . After we finished the shift i asked her about going to her place to recover some papers i had there and again she was like im going to have lunch with my aunt ,im not gonna be at home but ill be that at this hour if you want to come pick the things you need , i understood that she no longer wanted me there but maybe it's because of her room mates maybe she is running low on money maybe she just want some alone time although i wasn't intending to stay this long at her place she begged me every single le time to stay and not go and that i had nothing to fo there alone , i passed by a day later to take some of my stuff i couldn't nt take everything ng because i dont have a car and thanked her for her hospitality and left . During all of this time i was still talking to the dude very casually until ill one day he was like don't disappear for a long period of time and from that day on we had a continuous conversation but still very decent . Until one day we have met and he was like i can sense that we are not going to be just friend but u (me) keep lying to urself, nothing happened but we did agree that being friend is not enough for how much we are compatible in an implicit way nothing was directly said . I kept my relationship with her very normal when i met her at work because im not a fan of drama at work but she is so the next thing after kicking me out of her house is causing me problems with the supervisor complaining to him about how i just waste time and dont work and when i confronted her about it was all manipulative answers like u shouldn't have this much of a reaction don't raise your hands while talking i just left the argument because i didn't t wanna cause a scene at work .
Things with the dude are going slow and healthy she was right about some stuff but the majority was wrong not that it didn't happen between thembut because they didn't match it was always them fighting over the tiniest details .
Later on the dude started asking me about when did my parents get divorced and my financial crisis thing thats were never mentioned before in front on of me and no one took my consent to share -so basically she was telling everyone at work , him and her roommates that i was going through tough times and that i had to stay with her because she is helping me financially- and speaking about my parents they have divorced when i was 2 i was used to having my mom only and she did a great job providing like he didn't even have a space im my memory or my brain idk why she decided to mention that and make me look petty . She has also said that im in a huge fight with my older sister which is not true . I had to explain everything to the dude Also he asked me about how i feel now that we are going out out together knowing that she was my friend and stuff i also explained to him how i talked to her about this and how does she feel ,and he interrupted me saying we have only met a couple of times in the car we never went in a date. she is not my ex and it could be possible that she has feeling for me.
Me and the dude are having a stable relationship rn and idk how to feel about it please give ne ur analysis of this situation !

So the story goes like this: My ex best friend F31 asked me F23 to come stay with her because she lives closer to where we had our internship although i had my space well equipped .and i did , and during that time i was going with my bfM32 from back then, things went wrong we broke up and i wanted to recover my belongings from his space , he didn't care even after many times s i asked him ,so one day he did agree ro bring em to me and i was having a walk by the beach with my exfriend , he came drunk and his friend was drunk,and before we knew that we had to get in the car because he was in the middle of the road, my ex friend nd had to call her dude M32 to come save us from this weird situation before we get SAed . He came and kept on asking me about the dude and i was very responsive because i felt like he hd the right to know since he saved us . He drove us back at her place i thanked him and he and went first to let them have a private convo . 5minutes later she joined me saying that he had something to do and he went . And for the records this guy is her ex . She already has a bf that lives thats was back then in a different country so it was our only option . The next 2 days , he kept asking her about me alot like crazy and she only mentioned that without telling me her responses. And i didn't give it much thoughts because she was my friend and i trusted her . Afew days later we got an invitation to an event 3 hours away from our city and we (girls) didn't feel safe to go alone so we thought we should bring with us someone(a guy) from the same field to keep an eye on us and it was my suggestion to call him since he was very protective and handled the situation well he seemed decent and worked where we had the internship. She talked to him(via messages ) and didn't wanna sound desperate trying to find reasons to call so she asked me to him -she said that i wanted to tell him something i talked to him(in a call) in front of her told him exactly just about the event and she took the phone went to the kitchen and finished talking . She came back saying he said he will see his shifts and will let us know asap . Again she said i dont want him texting me ,i already took his consent to share his number . Send him a message to tell him it's u so he will let u know if he is going or not . That conversation happened but it didn't end there he kept having a conversation about random stuff while my ex friend had access to the conversation and told me what to answer sometimes, at a certain level she said from now on i don't wanna know your conversation anymore yall seem very compatible and im just gonna tell u (me) this from a friend to another , he is a bad person manipulator ...telling me all the bad things he is , and that she's only warning me because im her friend and she cares about me. I was like girl do u have feelings for him and she went like no im just scared for you he knows how to talk . I had this conversation with her 10 times exactly and each and every time she was like know to me he is trash knowing that she is already with someone.
Now is where the weird behavior started , she started talking less with me , avoiding eye contact but she has always had a similar phase where she just hates u for no reason so i was like it must be it ignored her behavior until one day i told her that i wanted to check on my house it has been more than a month and i decided to sleep at my place ,texted her the morning im on my way to your house so we can go together to work like we do every day and she was like didn't sleep at my place just go without me . I did and then she started telling me about an aunt and how she met her cousins and stuff and she had fun while i know she has no aunt in the city ,i didn't wanna go hard on her and acted like i believed ed it . After we finished the shift i asked her about going to her place to recover some papers i had there and again she was like im going to have lunch with my aunt ,im not gonna be at home but ill be that at this hour if you want to come pick the things you need , i understood that she no longer wanted me there but maybe it's because of her room mates maybe she is running low on money maybe she just want some alone time although i wasn't intending to stay this long at her place she begged me every single le time to stay and not go and that i had nothing to fo there alone , i passed by a day later to take some of my stuff i couldn't nt take everything ng because i dont have a car and thanked her for her hospitality and left . During all of this time i was still talking to the dude very casually until ill one day he was like don't disappear for a long period of time and from that day on we had a continuous conversation but still very decent . Until one day we have met and he was like i can sense that we are not going to be just friend but u (me) keep lying to urself, nothing happened but we did agree that being friend is not enough for how much we are compatible in an implicit way nothing was directly said . I kept my relationship with her very normal when i met her at work because im not a fan of drama at work but she is so the next thing after kicking me out of her house is causing me problems with the supervisor complaining to him about how i just waste time and dont work and when i confronted her about it was all manipulative answers like u shouldn't have this much of a reaction don't raise your hands while talking i just left the argument because i didn't t wanna cause a scene at work .
Things with the dude are going slow and healthy she was right about some stuff but the majority was wrong not that it didn't happen between thembut because they didn't match it was always them fighting over the tiniest details .
Later on the dude started asking me about when did my parents get divorced and my financial crisis thing thats were never mentioned before in front on of me and no one took my consent to share -so basically she was telling everyone at work , him and her roommates that i was going through tough times and that i had to stay with her because she is helping me financially- and speaking about my parents they have divorced when i was 2 i was used to having my mom only and she did a great job providing like he didn't even have a space im my memory or my brain idk why she decided to mention that and make me look petty . She has also said that im in a huge fight with my older sister which is not true . I had to explain everything to the dude Also he asked me about how i feel now that we are going out out together knowing that she was my friend and stuff i also explained to him how i talked to her about this and how does she feel ,and he interrupted me saying we have only met a couple of times in the car we never went in a date. she is not my ex and it could be possible that she has feeling for me.
Me and the dude are having a stable relationship rn and idk how to feel about it please give ne ur analysis of this situation !

The issue with Generator and Manifesing Generators types giving advice is how energy flows.
Yes, generators condition and will tell you things that keep you trapped. Listen to it to learn about their system. But never take their advice. From there you will have the deep desire to see the gap and realise it. Sometimes they came to your field to get their problems re-surfaced. That's got nothing to do with you. And if you care about them you can let them know. But don't waste your energy unless you 'feel' good when you are around that Gen or Mani Gen. Most of the time you won't feel good. Due to the energy being different.
Do your own thing. Don't follow anything or anyone. And talk to heaps to Manifestors to learn from your type but every Manis is different so again don’t get too literal. You hold the source.
Inform only to people who matter. That’s the common issue. Most Manis inform for the sake of it. Just tell people who matter to you. You will attract the people you need naturally. It’s part of the magic of Manis. But know which to tell which to ignore. Another thing is tell don’t respond. If someone asks you a question, answer it or dismiss it and say something that they need to know about you. Exit scene. Don’t be anywhere longer than you need to. Your energy will get wasted.
Informing is confusing because it’s just you moving through energies and sometimes they get in the way, even Manis, and just tell them what you need. I told a Manis to go away and do their self work because they are so angry. Give the message when you care about the person. But otherwise, leave them be. Your knowledge and energy is too precious. You don’t need to respond to them or inform. The message wasn’t for them. Learn this art and see yourself thrive. Tell, don’t feel obligated to interact if you don’t want to.
With hierarchy it’s hard. You shouldn’t have a boss. Either quit or Own your boss. When I had a boss, I will tell him every morning what I was doing. I didn’t give him space to tell me anything. And with that he felt my energy and allowed me to lead. The project was a massive success and I got promoted. I only had ‘fake’ bosses to answer to answer after that. Fake boss = advisors. And these fake bosses are the best, because they feel your energy and ride it to success. They never give me instructions or tell me what to do, because blocking that flow is blocking money and energy. I always took charge and told them respectfully what I am doing, what I’m gonna do and when. Watch the rewards rain in.
And if they resist, I got a generator to explain. I will never waste energy on resistance. I leave and give that space to someone to respond. Heaps of generators love responding and helping, and if they are smart about energy they work with how energy flows.
DM for more advice.

My name is Rory Fars, and my little sister, Lily Fars, is the last family I had left.
A heavy sense of dread settled over me like a suffocating blanket as I sat in the worn leather seat of Lily's old jeep. The car, a relic of our happier days, seemed to groan under our shared sorrow. Beside me, Lily, my best friend, and confidante, absentmindedly twirled a strand of her long, dark hair, which swayed gently in rhythm with the haunting melodies from the oldies station on the radio. This car had seen us through countless joyful journeys when our family was whole. Almost three years had passed since that fateful Christmas trip in Texas when our parents were tragically killed in a horrific multi-car pileup. The memory of their loss was a constant ache, a wound that never fully healed.
My dad was from Amarillo, Texas, so my parents often took trips down there, visiting the places that held so many memories for him. During one of these trips, just before Christmas, a sudden blizzard struck while they were on the freeway. The snow fell in blinding sheets, making the world outside a disorienting white blur. As they tried to slowly pull to the side, their vision obscured by the relentless storm, they never saw the car barreling toward them at least forty miles an hour. The impact was devastating, an abrupt and brutal end to their journey and, in many ways, to our lives as we had known them.
My parents were always sticklers for safety, insisting on seatbelts every time we got in the car. So, of course, they had theirs on during that fateful trip. The initial impact wasn't what killed them, the coroner explained to me. Not even the first hit from behind, which was going at least fifty miles an hour, was fatal. I had to practically shake the information out of him—they were so resistant to tell me anything at first. By the time the third car hit, with an unknown speed, their survival was already in jeopardy. The coroner said that by the fifth car, they were likely dead. But it didn't end there. Another twenty-three vehicles slammed into the back of the pile, each collision further crushing their bodies, reducing them to a horrific, unrecognizable state. Each jarring impact pushed my parents deeper into a gruesome amalgamation of twisted metal and shattered lives.
I don't know why I felt compelled to demand those details at the time, but I deeply regret it now. I wish I had never asked. Almost every night, unless I drink myself into oblivion, I am haunted by nightmares of what they endured. I dream of driving up to save them, only to be caught in the same deadly barrage of cars, ending in a twisted metal tomb for all of us.
Lily is never in those dreams. Even in my most horrific imaginings, I can't envision her being hurt. Lily is my little sister, younger by eight years and three months. Whenever I mention our age difference, I see the judgment in people's eyes, but what can I say? Our parents never stopped loving each other. They had Lily late in life; she became our shared joy, our living reminder of the love that had bound our family together.
Lily wasn't my twin in the literal sense, but ever since she was born, it felt like we shared the inexplicable connection that twins often describe. As she grew up, our bond only deepened—we acted, sounded, and even looked remarkably alike. She became my rock, especially after our parents' tragic deaths. We leaned on each other, cried into each other's shoulders, and somehow found the strength to move forward. We eventually moved in together, finding solace in a two-bedroom apartment that became our sanctuary.
Lily seemed to handle our parents' deaths better than I did, or maybe she was just better at distracting herself with technology. Even before their passing, Lily was addicted to any kind of digital screen she could manipulate. Her ability to navigate the digital world was unmatched; she was the most intelligent person I had ever met. Her intelligence was a beacon of light in the darkness that had enveloped us, a testament to her resilience and brilliance.
After my parents' death, I embarked on a quest to find my spirituality by delving into paranormal investigations. I hoped these pursuits would bring me closer to my parents in the afterlife, spiritual realm, or whatever you want to call it. Instead, it created a chasm between me and any sense of spiritual existence. Each investigation seemed to push me further from the answers I sought, leaving me feeling more isolated and disconnected than ever.
I had hoped that by exploring these paranormal claims, I would discover a way to reach out to my parents and feel their presence again. Yet, as the years have passed, this endeavor has only deepened my loneliness and sense of loss. Despite knowing how detrimental it is to my mental health, I can't bring myself to stop. The hope that the subsequent investigation will be the one that proves the existence of an afterlife and that I'll find a way to contact my parents keeps me going. It's a desperate, unrelenting pursuit for a connection that remains heartbreakingly out of reach.
I should have accepted their death and moved on like any sane person would. Instead, I let my grief fester and dragged my sister and a stranger, Mark, through my obsessive quest for answers. My relentless pursuit of the paranormal didn't just alienate me; it consumed us all, leading to their untimely deaths. My name is Rory Fars, and I am here to confess my side of the story about the missing case of Lily Fars and Mark Lawrence.
This is the truth about how my desperate search for a connection with the afterlife led to a nightmare from which none of us could escape.
To start off, no, Lily was not a student of Mark's who fell in love with him and then got jealous of me hitting on him, leading her to kill him and herself. I know that sounds ridiculous, but given some wild theories circulating online, I need to address this one specifically since it seems to be the most popular.
First and foremost, Mark Lawrence was not, nor has he ever been, a professor at a university. Lily and I met Mark at the Local Museum in Redlin, a town nestled deep in the Appalachian Mountains. He was the curator of an exhibit showcasing the history of Raven's Nest, a forgotten mining town that neither Lily nor I had ever heard of. This is where our story begins, in a place steeped in history and mystery, far removed from the convoluted theories that now cloud the truth.
We were constantly searching for new ideas for our podcast about paranormal claims. Each of our twenty-five episodes so far had concluded with a rational explanation, so when Mark told us about the curse of Harper, I was immediately intrigued.
Mark was an older man, likely in his mid-sixties, with a full head of silver hair and a beard that stubbornly clung to its youthful color, only lightly dusted with grey. He had a presence that commanded attention, and his stories about the curse were delivered with an intensity that drew me in.
On the other hand, Lily was always more interested in the technical aspects of the paranormal. She had her own theories and was determined to debunk every claim we investigated. She wasn't easily swayed by Mark's tales about the curse of Harper, but she was willing to listen and give him a chance to prove himself. Her skeptical mind constantly checked my enthusiasm, and together, we hoped to uncover the truth behind yet another paranormal mystery.
"Hello ladies, care to hear about the mysterious town of Raven's Nest?" Mark asked with theatrical enthusiasm.
Lily and I exchanged a knowing glance, trying to stifle our amusement. Despite our attempts to remain composed, a smirk played at the corners of our lips.
"We're all ears," I replied, my tone laced with a hint of sarcasm.
He sighed, almost as if he was disappointed that we said yes. Taking a deep breath, he seemed to steel himself for the task ahead. "Well, you see," he began, his voice tinged with uncertainty, "in the early twentieth century, a man named Harper Franstein exploited many men and children in the coal mines. By the mid-1920s, he had established his own settlement in a secluded valley, which he dubbed 'The Raven's Nest.' It was never officially recognized as a town, but that's the only name we have to go off of."
I could see the beads of sweat forming on Mark's brow as he struggled to recall every detail. Despite his initial enthusiasm, he now appeared flustered, his confidence waning. Eventually, he resorted to consulting his damp and crumpled notes, a sign of his growing unease.
"Um, anyway, yeah, um," he stuttered, audibly gulping as his nerves got the better of him. Lily couldn't contain her laughter, emitting a snicker that earned us a glare from Mark.
"Hey, just relax," I interjected, trying to diffuse the tension. "We're not here to judge or intimidate you." With a gentle touch on his forearm and a chuckle, I attempted to reassure him, hoping to ease his obvious discomfort.
He paused, sharing a chuckle with me, while Lily struggled to suppress her laughter and eventually excused herself, leaving just Mark and me. Evidently, he felt more at ease with fewer listeners, so he pressed on with his narrative.
"Anyway," he resumed, "Harper held complete control over the town and the mine, and he made sure everyone was acutely aware of that fact. When the disappearances began, he tried to sweep them under the rug, attributing them to anything but his own negligence in mining practices."
"What do you mean by 'negligence in mining practices'?" I interjected, eager to delve deeper into his intriguing tale.
He looked up, clearly pleased by my question. "Yes, exactly," he affirmed. "Harper adhered to a mining technique outlined by Dwight Brunst in the mid to late nineteenth century. This method mandated only one entry and exit point into the mine."
"Wait, so they were forbidden from creating additional exits?" I pressed for clarification.
"Not explicitly," he explained. "The practice advocated for just one entry and exit as it was believed to minimize the risk of cave-ins, at least in theory. However, there were instances where miners, feeling uneasy about this restriction, took matters into their own hands and carved out what they called 'Emergency Exits' for themselves. After about half of the town started going missing, Harper couldn't take criticism about how he responded, but most people say he was losing money quickly and didn't want to live in a world where he was poor. He walked into the mine, never to be seen again, much like the cave's past victims. Visitors report seeing and hearing Harper, trying to get them to leave."
As I stood there, listening to Mark's enthralling narrative, I found myself captivated by the mysterious allure of Raven's Nest. Unable to contain my curiosity, I decided to pose a question.
"So, what does the town look like now?" I inquired, eager to learn more about the present state of this enigmatic place.
Mark's demeanor shifted slightly as he rifled through his notes, a subtle indication that he didn't have a straightforward answer to my query.
"You've never been there?" I asked, my tone softening with genuine curiosity.
He flinched as though my question had struck a nerve. "Shhhhhh... shut up," he demanded, his voice tinged with unease.
Suppressing a chuckle, I leaned in closer and whispered, "Okay, hear me out. My sister Lily and I are investigating paranormal phenomena. Your story about Raven's Nest sounds like the perfect addition to our podcast. What do you say we compensate you for your guidance? Let's say, three hundred bucks?"
He straightened up, contemplating my proposition for a few moments. Without uttering a word, he extended his hand, and I met it halfway with my own, sealing our agreement with a firm handshake.
Our journey to Raven's Nest was no easy feat. Situated a good twenty miles from town and nestled deep within a dense valley. After all of the tight turns, narrow dirt roads, and steep inclines, it took us a grueling two and a half hours to go twenty-something miles, but we finally reached the outskirts of the infamous settlement. As we stood at the edge of the "Nest," anticipation mingled with trepidation, setting the stage for the eerie exploration that lay ahead.
I glanced at my phone; the time read 11:56 pm, signaling the late hour. Sensing the exhaustion weighing heavily, I suggested we catch a few hours of rest in Lily's jeep. Mark, though visibly unsettled, remained silent from the back seat, his arms folded tightly across his chest as he slumped against the window like a sulking child.
Drifting asleep in the passenger seat, I soon found myself ensnared in a nightmare. In my dream, Mark was being dragged away into the darkness, his desperate attempts to claw his way back to safety only resulting in broken fingertips. Despite his struggles, he was powerless against the unseen force pulling him inexorably into the abyss. Suddenly, I was alone, engulfed in utter darkness, my heart pounding with fear as I ran blindly from an unseen terror that seemed to pursue me relentlessly, its malevolent presence palpable but unseen.
I jolted awake, gasping for breath, my heart racing as the remnants of dread lingered in the pit of my stomach. It was morning, and I was struggling to adjust my vision. Lily's frantic but comforting voice broke through the haze of my terror, grounding me in reality. With her comforting embrace, I gradually calmed my racing thoughts, drawing deep, steadying breaths.
As we sat there, enveloped in each other's embrace, Mark approached the driver's side window with an unexpected question, "Alright, what's for breakfast?" His nonchalant tone and casual demeanor were a stark contrast to the harrowing nightmare that had just consumed my thoughts, momentarily dispelling the lingering specter of fear that had haunted my dreams.
Lily and I both look up at him and back at each other as we burst out into laughter.
Amidst our shared laughter, Lily and I exchanged amused glances before turning our attention back to Mark.
"Ha...ha, yeah. No, but seriously, what's for breakfast? Eggs, bacon, toast, at least?" Mark pressed, hoping for a more substantial response.
His earnest inquiry fueled our laughter further, our giggles echoing through the quiet night air. Eventually, we regained our composure and stepped out of the jeep, stretching our limbs after the cramped confines of the vehicle.
Mark awkwardly moves to the side, still waiting for an honest answer. Lily tossed him a granola bar, eliciting a bemused chuckle from him. With a shared understanding, we set off on foot, embarking on the hike into the town.
The path ahead was clear: a single dirt road that wound its way from the abandoned coal mine into the heart of the small settlement. The road, now overgrown and muddy from years of disuse, bore the marks of neglect and isolation. Wary of the treacherous conditions, Lily opted to forgo the risk of getting stuck, steering clear of the decrepit road that likely hadn't seen a traveler in at least half a century.
We parked Lily's jeep at the entrance to both the mine and the town of Raven's Nest, opting to proceed on foot from there. Standing at the mountain's peak, gazing down at the desolate town below, I couldn't help but ponder the history beneath the dilapidated structures. I imagined how this valley must have once been a pristine landscape cherished by the indigenous people who roamed its lush terrain.
"Jesus, this place is more like a shit nest," Mark muttered in disgust, his disdain evident in his tone.
Lily shot me a knowing glance, silently communicating her skepticism toward Mark's assessment of the town.
Deciding to put Mark's knowledge to the test, I casually inquired, "So, what year was this area founded?"
Mark's reaction was almost defensive as if my question had caught him off guard. He hesitated momentarily before fumbling for his note cards in his pocket, a telltale sign that he wasn't as knowledgeable as he let on.
Before he could respond, I interjected with another question, "Mark, how long have you worked at the museum?"
As Mark froze, his gaze locking onto mine like a deer caught in headlights, I watched him closely, waiting for any sign of hesitation or discomfort. My narrowed eyes bore into his, silently urging him to be honest.
Finally, breaking the tense silence, Mark confessed, "Look, this is only my first week. I... I haven't had the greatest time lately, and I really need the extra money. I'm sorry I lied, but I'll help however I can."
I met his gaze unwaveringly, sensing the sincerity in his words. Clearly, he was a man in need of redemption, grappling with his own personal struggles.
"Alright, alright, don't cry too much," I teased lightly, trying to ease the tension. Gesturing towards Lily, who was busy preparing her wireless motion cameras in her backpack, I continued, "Lily and I already figured that was the case. Honestly, we're surprised you agreed to come along."
Mark remained frozen, but the tension seemed to melt away from his expression, replaced by a tentative smile. It was a moment of shared understanding, a silent acknowledgment that he was still welcomed into our expedition despite his initial deception.
"Alright, I have the cams and portable batteries to make sure the cameras and anything we have with power can last," Lily said, her voice brimming with determination.
We began our descent into the town, our hiking boots struggling against the thick, clinging mud produced by the constant light rain and years of disuse. Each step was a battle, the mud threatening to swallow our boots with every move.
After an eternity of trudging through the muck, we finally reached the town's only paved road—the main road. It had taken us only about fifteen minutes to hike down, but navigating the muddy slope had sapped our energy. We paused for a break, taking a few minutes to clean off our boots and catch our breath.
As we rested, I noticed Lily rummaging through her bag with a focused intensity. Curious, I asked, "What are you looking for?"
"I brought five motion-detecting cameras that I want to set up strategically throughout the town," she replied, pulling out one of the cameras. She walked over to the nearest building, a structure that served as a post office, police station, and fire station. She positioned the camera outside the building so it was pointed at the only road leading in and out of the town.
"We need to cover all potential points of interest," she explained, securing the camera in place. "This one will monitor any activity on the main road. We should place the other cameras around key locations like the mine entrance, the town square, and some more intact buildings."
I nodded, appreciating her thoroughness. "Good idea. We need to make sure we capture anything unusual."
Mark, having finally caught his breath, joined us. "Alright, let's get these cameras set up and see what we can find," he said, a hint of excitement in his voice.
"Look," Lily said, turning her tablet screen toward us. She waved her hand in front of the camera she had just placed. The tablet displayed five squares on the interface, each meant to show a feed from one of the cameras. Since Lily had only set up one camera so far, only the bottom right square showed any footage pointed at the road leading out of town. She stopped waving her hand, and the feed went to a blue screen.
"What happened? Did we lose connection?" Mark asked frantically, his eyes wide with concern.
Lily cackled, struggling to contain her amusement. Composing herself, she waved her hand in front of the camera again, and the bottom right square showed her hand waving once more. "It's motion-activated. It's the best way to save on battery life," she explained.
Mark seemed to relax, though he was still catching his breath after the brief panic.
I glanced at my watch, noting the time. "It's 8:30. We're behind schedule. If you want to place the rest of your cameras, we better move now," I said, walking down the street.
Lily immediately got up and followed me, with Mark struggling to keep pace behind us. We reached the market building, and Lily positioned her second camera on the side of the road, pointing up at the market.
It's not much longer before we make it to the Town Hall. I suggest Lily place a camera nearby. She nods and heads into a building across from the Town Hall labeled, "Slaughterhouse: LOCAL ANIMALS ONLY."
As Lily explores the building to find an adequate spot for the camera, I wait for Mark to catch up. While I wait, I can't help but imagine this town in its prime, picturing the streets filled with families who loved each other.
My thoughts are abruptly cut off by a sound echoing in the distance—a roar unlike any I've ever heard. It was a mix of a human screaming in pain, the roar of a lion, and, near the end, the howl of a wolf. The chilling sound sent shivers down my spine.
I jump to my feet and immediately call out, "Lily, you okay?"
There's no response from Lily, but I'm interrupted by Mark finally catching up, panting heavily.
"Holy... shit... did you... hear that?" Mark said frantically between breaths.
"Yeah, we have to find Lily," I say, bolting into the slaughterhouse. I glance back to see Mark bracing himself on the steps of the Town Hall, struggling to keep up.
As I enter the building, the stench of rotting flesh hits me like a wave, causing me to gag. The smell is too fresh to be decades old.
"Lily? Lily, where are you?" I yell, using my shirt to shield my nose from the overwhelming odor.
"Rory, I'm in here!" I hear Lily yell from a room two doors down. I pass the first door, peeking in to ensure I hadn't misheard, but I wish I hadn't looked.
Inside the first room, I catch a glimpse of what appears to be a pile of animal carcasses, their decayed bodies arranged in a grotesque display. The sight is horrifying, the flesh still disturbingly fresh. The bile rises in my throat, but I force myself to focus on finding Lily.
I rush to the room where her voice came from, pushing the door open. Lily is there, setting up the camera, seemingly oblivious to the horror in the adjacent room. Relief floods through me as I see she's safe.
"Lily, did you hear that roar?" I ask, trying to keep my voice steady.
"Yeah, I heard it," she replies, her eyes wide with concern. "I was just finishing up here. Let's get back to Mark and figure out what that was." She had placed the camera in a window, pointing directly at the Town Hall.
We hurry back outside, where Mark still catches his breath as we meet between the buildings. "We need to stay together from now on," I say firmly, looking at both of them. "Whatever that noise was, it's not something we want to face alone."
"Let's check out the Town Hall!" Mark says excitedly as he slowly clambers through a broken window.
"Did he not just hear what I said?" I mutter under my breath, shaking my head in disbelief.
Lily gives me a shrug, her eyes reflecting a mix of amusement and exasperation. "Guess we're heading into the Town Hall then," she says, adjusting her backpack and walking towards the broken window.
I sigh and follow suit, hoisting myself up and carefully maneuvering through the jagged glass. Inside, the air is musty, filled with the scent of old paper and decaying wood. Dust motes float lazily in the beams of sunlight streaming through the cracked windows.
The main hall is vast and eerily silent, with rows of empty chairs facing a stage draped in tattered curtains. The walls are lined with faded portraits and yellowed maps of the town, remnants of a time when this place was alive and bustling.
Mark is already at the front, examining a large, decrepit desk. "Look at this," he says, his voice echoing in the empty space. "It's like stepping back in time."
I walk over, glancing at the old papers scattered across the desk. Most are mundane—meeting minutes, maintenance logs—but one catches my eye. It's a letter dated June 1925, addressed to Harper Franstein.
"Harper, the disappearances are becoming more frequent. The townsfolk are getting restless, and I fear they may take matters into their own hands if we don't act soon. We need to find out what's causing this before it's too late."
I read the letter aloud, and the room fell silent. "Sounds like things were getting pretty tense," Lily remarks, her voice subdued.
As I'm distracted by the time capsule in front of us, Mark sneaks off.
I'm not sure how long it was before she noticed, but I saw Lily looking around before saying, "Where the hell did Mark go?" breaking me out of my trance.
I look around, turning my head in all directions, and shrug at Lily. I hear shuffling in the second room down the hall, so I slowly walk toward it.
"Mark?" I call out.
Just then, a loud crash reverberates through the building, making it sound like the whole place was about to come down.
We run in and see Mark struggling to keep himself from falling into a giant hole that must've broken under his weight. Trying not to laugh, I glance at Lily. We help him up as he dramatically falls onto his back, wheezing as he catches his breath.
Lily and I can't contain our laughter anymore as we bust out laughing hard. Startled by our sudden outburst, Mark jumps in fear. He looks around, confused for a few seconds, before realizing that we are laughing at him.
"Jesus, thanks, I guess," he says, clearly thankful but annoyed by our reaction.
After we contained ourselves, we headed back outside, exiting through the window Mark entered through. He struggles to climb out, but after Lily gives him a hand, he is safely out of the Town Hall.
"Alright, Ror, where should we put the next camera?" Lily asks me.
I stop to think momentarily, trying to picture the town's layout. "I think the only place left is the neighborhood," I respond confidently. I always talk like that with Lily. Over the years, I've realized she is the only person I can have that much confidence around. With anyone else, I'm worried about saying something stupid or wrong or how they'll view me, but with my sister, everything is easy.
As I look at the replica map of the town in its heyday from the museum, I determine that the neighborhood is to the East. "Okay, looks like we head East past the Library. Let's go." I say, walking away.
It only takes about eight minutes to get to the long strip of road that housed the town's workers. According to the map, there were fifteen houses along this strip of road.
The houses stand eerily silent, their wooden frames weathered and decayed by time. We walk down the road, our footsteps crunching on the gravel and echoing in the stillness. The air feels heavier here like the past is watching us, waiting to reveal its secrets.
"Let's put the last cameras on that house at the end of the road," I suggest, pointing to a house that looks slightly less dilapidated than the others, "another one at the last house on the other side, and the last we can save for a spot you choose."
Lily nods and heads toward the first house, pulling another camera from her backpack. She sets it up on the porch, positioning it to capture the entire street, and does the same in the opposite house. As I stand with Mark breathing hard, still unable to catch his breath since we first got here, I can't shake the feeling that we're being watched. I glance around nervously but see nothing out of the ordinary.
"All set," Lily says, breaking my reverie, "Still no ideas for the last cam?" Lily asks me.
"Like I said, wherever you think it would be best. I feel like we have enough good spots and angles, so go wild with that one," I told her.
She smirked and kept walking next to me. Mark was still struggling behind, but after the town hall mishap, he was trying his best to keep up. I looked at my watch, and it read '12:30 pm'.
"Holy shit, it's already 12:30," I said in amazement, but no one else seemed fazed. It felt like we'd only been here thirty minutes, not almost four hours.
We walked back down the street. Lily and I had been discussing on the walk that she should put the last camera at the town's only stoplight in front of the Library.
As we made our way to it, I could have sworn I was seeing something moving fast past my vision in the corner of my eye. Every time I turned to look, it was gone. I chalked it up to being my imagination until Lily and Mark both experienced the same thing.
"What the fuck was that?" Mark asked as he ducked, bracing for something terrible to happen. Lily and I looked back at him and then at each other as we shrugged. It was after that that I started seeing things, too.
I confided in Lily about the unsettling visions and sounds, and she admitted she had experienced the same phenomena but had kept quiet, fearing Mark would dismiss her as paranoid.
"Well, it's probably just a cat or something," I said, attempting to downplay the situation, but neither seemed convinced.
We continued our trek, and I noticed that the more we walked, the more frequently I caught fleeting glimpses of movement in my peripheral vision. It was beginning to grate on my nerves.
Finally, we reached the light in front of the Library. As Lily mounted the camera, I felt a sense of satisfaction. We were making good progress, and it seemed like a suitable moment to start exploring the town more freely. We decided to split up and cover different sections of the town.
"Wait, we have to go alone? Why can't we stay together like you said?" Mark asked frantically, but Lily and I ignored him as we headed in separate directions. He continued to protest, but we paid him no mind. Eventually, I was either far enough away to not hear him anymore, or he had given up. Either way, I was happy to enjoy the eerie silence of the town.
As I wandered, the stillness of Raven's Nest enveloped me. With its decrepit buildings and overgrown streets, the town exuded an unsettling charm. It was as if I had stepped into a forgotten world, a place frozen in time with secrets waiting to be unearthed. The ambiance reminded me of an amusement park's haunted town section—artificially eerie yet irresistibly intriguing. Despite the creepiness, the mysterious vibe of the town kept me engaged and eager to explore its hidden corners.
I glanced at my watch again, only to find the time glaring back at me: 3:19 pm. It couldn't be right. There was no way it had been that long since I last checked. Panic seized me, and I called out for Lily, my voice tinged with urgency. She appeared beside me in a matter of minutes, her expression mirroring my concern.
"What's up, Ror? You okay?" she asked, her voice laced with worry.
"How long would you say it's been since you put the last camera down?" I inquired, my heart pounding in my chest.
Lily's brow furrowed as she struggled to come up with an answer. "Uh, I don't know, thirty minutes?" she hazarded a guess.
I held up my watch, displaying the time: 3:20 pm. Lily fell silent, her eyes widening in disbelief. She was never great with time, but missing almost three hours of our memory was unprecedented.
"There's no way. Your watch must be—" Lily began, her voice trailing off as she checked her own watch, only to freeze in shock when she found it displayed the same time as mine.
"Lil, something is going on," I stated, my voice tight and apprehensive. I glanced up at the sky, my stomach churning as I noticed the clouds darkening and rolling in from all sides of the valley.
The sky closed rapidly, ominous clouds obscuring the sun as thunder rumbled ominously against the mountains.
"Mark? Mark, where are—" I began to call out, but before I could finish, Mark emerged from behind a wall, appearing as if he'd been too frightened to venture far on his own.
"We have to get inside!" Mark exclaimed urgently, his voice tinged with fear.