Oa words and picturesc

Maranee!

2016.04.03 16:43 DootDootDiet Maranee!

Sabldiri is a language created by members of the sabldiripo Robin room and those who later merged with it. All are welcome to participate and contribute to the language.
[link]


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(** 𝐓𝐄𝐗𝐓 𝐌𝐄 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐀 𝐐𝐔𝐈𝐂𝐊 𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐋𝐘 **)
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𝐌𝐘 𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐋𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐀𝐂𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐂 𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐊𝐒 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐘𝐎𝐔:
𝐌𝐘 𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐌'𝐒 𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐄𝐗𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐓𝐈𝐒𝐄:
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2024.05.16 06:46 LudvigWittgenstein8 Now That Jokic has won 3 MVPS in 4 Years, While Leading the NBA in: PER, WS, WS/48, VORP, BOX+/- For FOUR Straight Seasons (Unprecedented in NBA History), Is He Officially Greater Than LeBron? IMO he is. Jokic > LeBron

Now That Jokic has won 3 MVPS in 4 Years, While Leading the NBA in: PER, WS, WS/48, VORP, BOX+/- For FOUR Straight Seasons (Unprecedented in NBA History), Is He Officially Greater Than LeBron?
After all, we keep being told that LeBron is the "gOaT" because of "sTaTs" even though there is hardly any advanced metric that puts LeBron ahead of MJ, but lets even take the stats argument on face value.
If stats and advanced stats are our barometer of greatness, which it seems to be on Reddit, then hasn't Jokic's recently statistical exploits catapulted him AHEAD of LeBron in the all-time rankings?
It can't be Rings that are deciding factor, because LeBron only has *4 rings, really 3, the Bubble Ring was a comical caricature of professional basketball with tepid participation. LeBron has two rings in normal, standard 82 Game Seasons. Two. The other two were in Strike-Shortened or Pandemic-Shortened Seasons.
If we are going to fetishize advanced stats and stats in general, while obsessing over "efficiency" metrics, then by that criteria Jokic is the clearly superior player to LeBron.
Since "rings are a team award," Jokic > LeBron.
Otherwise the Bronsexuals will have to come to terms with the fact that rings IN FACT DO MATTER.
But they won't say this until Jokic wins his 4th MVP next season.
IMO this version of Jokic we are seeing, 40 points, 13 assists, 0 TOs (only CP3 has ever done that), is BETTER than ANY version of LeBron. And he's doing this without a Super Team. KCP was on LeBron's team. Aaron Gordon was available to the entire league, only Denver really pursued him. LeBron, on the other hand, has had more supporting help than any superstar in history while underachieving with said talent more than any superstar in history.
History will not remember LeBron as fondly as his fanboys think. Mark my words. He's already lost Polls on ESPN.com asking who's more Clutch: LeBron or Kobe (Kobe won the poll by a landslide, 60%+). He also lost the Poll by FIBA asking who's the Greatest Player Of All-Time: Mj finished, by some distance, as first, Kobe finished 2nd (and it wasn't even close), meanwhile LeBron battled Curry for what amounts to a third place tie.
It seems like despite all the Klutch Sports propaganda at ESPN and Fox Sports, the people aren't buying the snake oil.
Thoughts?
submitted by LudvigWittgenstein8 to UncensoredSportsNews [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 20:42 sheldon_y14 Tunes of Suriname: The iconic 2010's

For Surinamese millennials and/or early Gen-Zs the 2010-2017/18 era songs and musical styles played an important role in shaping them and are so called "core memories".
The music of this era doesn't have one particular genre. The styles are blends of styles that would be similar to RnB, Reggae, Zouk, Soca, Pop, Dance-pop, Alternative Hip Hop, Rap, Aleke (maroon genre), Baithak Gana/Chutney etc.
Remarkable of these songs is that Surinamese artists try experimenting more with Dutch in their songs. This is not common in Surinamese music, because we use more local languages in our songs.
It definitely was also an era music that also boosted a national pride with the youth. It was a time where Suriname was doing economically well after years of being on the poor side.
Each artist has their own style, so I'll try to list them per artist or group:
  1. Damaru (pop, surinamese-pop and a bit of reggae); it started all with this guy and his famous single "mi rowsu":
    1. Damaru - Mi Rowsu
      1. Worth mentioning is this version of the song that became popular in Suriname and the Netherlands: Damaru & Jan Smit - Mi Rowsu (Tuintje In Mijn Hart)
    2. Damaru & Booster - Schatje Lief
  2. Mighty Youth (RnB, pop, zouk, rap);
    1. The Mighty Youth ft. Enver - Bomikie
    2. The Mighty Youth - Vibes
  3. Suri All Starz or one of their individual artists (pop, hip hop, Soca, Zouk):
    1. SURINAME - Suri All Starz by I Love SU; this was an iconic one that is still played at big events
    2. The Suri All Starzz - Zover; this one has some Zouk-pop elements and maybe a bit of a reggae guitar in it.
    3. Su pon di wine, Danitsia Sahadewsing (Suri All Starzz); their soca-suriname brassband style song
  4. Poppe, Colonel, Lodiliki, Enver, Donavey (reggae, pop, rap, rock, alternative hip hop); these songs usually have a hidden message:
    1. Lodilikie ft. Enver - No onderschat mi [OFFICIAL VIDEO]; THIS A BOP! This was especially popular with boys. We all felt like tiny "gangsters" and also tried to see who could rap the "fastest" (in Dutch and Aukan) and if we also could sing the Aukan parts. Every radio station played this song. Play this song at a party nowadays and everyone might recite this song by heart.
    2. Poppe x Damaru x Donavey - Hard om te zeggen; BOP!!! We used to sing this in harmony by heart in the school bus, especially the chorus.
    3. Poppe x Fenomeen - Bla bla; A BOP! Poppe her songs always have a message.
    4. Colonel - Grafsteen [OFFICIAL VIDEO]; this guy is quite famous in France nowadays. His songs also had messages
    5. Luku fa yu dong- Enver; BOP! A rap/song about broken heart.
    6. Colonel ft. Jayh - Gek op Jou (zouk, pop); BOP!!!!! They other guy Jayh is a Curaçaoan guy.
  5. Ztreetzoldierz (zouk, RnB, pop, soca, kaseko and maybe even a bit of chutney, rap and hip hop):
    1. Snoepje - Ztreetzoldierz ft Mixey; BOP! Brings back fun memories of school and the schoolbus.
    2. Ztreetzoldierz & Mixey - Na mi moni pai fing
    3. Ztreetzoldierz Hinderdaad
  6. Kenny B (reggae, zouk); Kenny B is one of Suriname's iconic and greatest sons. Everyone loves him. He has a few great hits, but his most famous ones are:
    1. KENNY B. & BENAISSA - Yu Faya; A BOP! We used to sing this in the school bus every day almost.
    2. Kenny B & Jeffrey Spalburg - Paramaribo-o-o; BOP, BOP, BOP!!! HANDS DOWN! This song overall is popular with Surinamese of all ages.
    3. Kenny B - Parijs
    4. Kenny B and Tekisha - Tjaipi Lobi [official video]; BOP!
    5. Kenny B ft Tequisha Abel - Nex ne tai
  7. Scrappy W (rap, alternative hip hop); Scrappy W rapped and sang mostly about the things in our society that are seen slightly taboo and racist or discriminative, but in a comical way and showing that we should step away from those mindsets.
    1. SCRAPPY W - DIKKE VROUWEN; the name of the song is "fat women"
    2. Scrappy W - Super Saamaka; a song about his experiences as a Saramaccan Maroon and stereotypes in our society on maroons. He uses the term Dyuka a lot for example. A word other Surinamese use derogatory to refer to maroons.
    3. Scrappy W - Yvette; about experiences of a young guy in school who wants to do his best in school and how a girl wants him, sexually harasses him and how the police reacts and how it feels as a teen to be in that position and have no one listen to you or to go to.
  8. Others that had great and popular hits (some of you might even recognize certain beats):
    1. HORI YU - KAYENTE FT. SPITSO STREZZ 2FAMOUSCRW (PROD.SLCTBTS) (zouk, dance-pop, Dutch dance-pop)
    2. DJOEGOE DJOEGOE - Selecta Ft. Kayente (2FAMOUSCRW) (Surinamese style Chuntey, pop, zouk(?))
    3. Kayente & Baby FT. T.I.K. - Tamara; My Latin friends in the sub will know this beat as there is a song with this exact beat. This one however has elements of Surinamese genres.
    4. KAYENTE & KURUPA - KIRIKHAIBANA (Official Music Video) (kaseko, Amerindian genres)
As mentioned, this period brought back a feeling of national pride. Many songs were also a reason for this. The I Love SU brand also sponsored a few of these songs that were great hits.
  1. The Suriname song by Suri All StarZ was one of them, and the Paramaribo song by Kenny B too.
  2. Audrey Bakrude & Enver & Kolonel - I Love Su; BOP! This song has elements of house, dance and pop.
  3. Damaru - Suriname; This song is so iconic and was such a great hit, that even foreign vloggers that visit use this in their videos.
Nowadays other songs dominate the stage. Most of these artists have other jobs too. Some became music producers, movie makers, one became a flight attendant, one a fireman etc. So, I hope you enjoy the styles of the iconic 2010's. Also, have you heard any of these songs before?
submitted by sheldon_y14 to AskTheCaribbean [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 18:37 StarofStarlight Am I being dramatic towards sa Mom ko?

Hello! First time posting here in this thread section, please bear with me. I'm 29(f) and currently living at my parent's home. I moved out before but my Mom guilt tripped me into coming back because of my younger sibling who is non-verbal autistic. I recently resigned my job due toxic management and currently taking a break before going back. Don't worry I saved up enough money to pay my own share of rent to my parents.
Recently my Mom got mad towards me because of something and she's blaming me for it. Usually when that happens, I just ignore the words and keep nodding to make her happy. Kasi if I talk back, she'll start ranting and ranting. If I try to explain my side, she'll make snarky comments towards me. I don't know what's gotten with me today (I guess sa init ng panahon) so I snapped back and said bakit kasalanan ko yun. So yeah... lumabas ang mga kampon ni Santanas and nagsagutan kami ni Mom.
Ayun, I brought up the past how she slapped me so many times during my college years because naniwala sya sa mga Marites and yung pinagsasabi nila na buntis ako. I proved her wrong and she never said sorry for it. Her comeback? Masyadong ako OA and dramatic. Hahaha...
Tbh I never moved on from that incident. It's that day I never trusted her ever again. What should I do? Is she right?
submitted by StarofStarlight to adviceph [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 17:20 keatonsteuben D080 Accelerated Pass Recommendations

D080 Accelerated Pass Recommendations
This course requires more effort than others. You can and you will pass it. Don't listen to the posts on here that whine about the difficulty. That will distract you. Accept the fact that this course takes greater focus, and commit to a plan to set yourself up for success.
That said, I'd like to provide some context before I share my approach to passing the OA on the first attempt.
  • Unit 2 is 36% of the OA (see the screenshot)
  • The OA is totally different from the PA. Additionally, the wording of the questions and the available multiple-choice answers differ from the material in the quizzes and tests from the textbook. (This was frustrating for me.) What helped was to take my time on each question and think critically. Also, I bookmarked about 15 questions during the exam. Revisiting them later in the test significantly improved my confidence in the selections I ended up settling on.
The approach I used:
  1. Skim the text & only stop to read what interests you / sticks out to you (I do this first in most courses to build momentum for studying.)
  2. Find a quizlet (search D080), & use the "learn" function to quickly gain an understanding of terms and concepts
  3. Return to the course text - take all the quizzes and tests for every module and then unit.
  4. Take the PA, pass/fail doesn't matter (but if you use hjon420's D080 WGU quizlet you should get 100%)
  5. Return to the text again and read all of unit 2, then take the quizzes and unit test again (it is best to do this shortly before taking the OA).
  6. Finally (the most important step): Ensure you are well-rested, well-fed, and well-caffeinated. Crush that OA!
Get after it!
https://preview.redd.it/6cmtkj1ete0d1.png?width=887&format=png&auto=webp&s=95dd2ac669c1953f85ec407b628da231e789aa9e
submitted by keatonsteuben to WGU [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 01:03 disbbiscute I worry about my body size.

I'm a 25yrs old girly na 49kg pag gutom and 50kg pag busog, pero when you look at me, I look like I weigh 56-60kg (hindi ako OA, bc I have friends na 60kg pero pag magkakatabi kami, parehas lang kami ng lapad.)
I get stressed and anxious kapag nakikita ko yung katawan ko sa salamin. I have PCOS, kaya kahit anong jogging ko, walang nangyayari.. ang hirap alisin nung fat sa katawan ko.
I only do OMAD and LC diet (One meal a day Low Carb)
Ngayon, sinubukan kong itusok yung daliri ko sa lalamunan ko para lang masuka ko yung kinain ko.
Napaiyak na lang ako sa ginawa ko nung narealize ko na mali tong ginawa ko, pero I'm desperate.
Gusto kong pumayat, gusto ko ibalik yung katawan ko nung college ako. 24-27 lang waistline ko noon.
My OB told me to loose weight na dapat daw 44-45kg lang ako. Pero grabe, nakaka anxious.
Alam kong maliit yung problema ko compare sa problema ng ibang tao. I really just want to get this off my chest.
If may partner kayo, or kakilala na may PCOS.. please be kind and mindful of your words. We know we're fat. Pero we're really trying our best to be healthy 🥺
PS. Please be kind if you're gonna comment 🥺
submitted by disbbiscute to OffMyChestPH [link] [comments]


2024.05.14 00:48 SourSensuousness Passed D281 / Linux Essentials OA!

Got a 690, nice.
Prior to this, my only real experience with Linux had been making a Raspberry Pi tablet that nobody really uses, and installing Kali Linux on a potato laptop. I'm a Mac user and I have used Terminal a bit, and I used DOS a lot in the 90s, so some of the material (particularly hardware, basic CLI) was familiar to me. I started studying about two and a half weeks ago.
In case this is helpful to anybody, this is what I did and here are my thoughts:
Exam:
Recommendations:
OK, onward and upward. Hope this helps somebody out.
submitted by SourSensuousness to WGU_CompSci [link] [comments]


2024.05.13 21:10 TransportationAny876 I thought our love was perfect. Her dumping completely blindsided me.

Burner for privacy, names omitted
"People spend their entire lives looking for someone like that, and don't find it" - My Dad
We met in September 2023, the fall semester of our Freshman year of College. We started officially dating on November 17, 2023. and we broke it off on May 11, 2024 at midnight. Just a few days ago, I was dumped over video call. My now ex girlfriend 18F asked to call me 19M because she wanted to talk about "something important". Immediately I was nervous because previously, when she texted like that, it was because she wanted to discuss the state of our relationship; to air out greivances, to address ongoing issues, to restructure the way we interact, etc. Anyway, I joined the call, she was unable to speak, and to fill the silence I excitedly list off all the things I had been thinking and doing. After I ran out of things to talk about, she told me that we are polar opposites in the way we physically express affection, and for that reason, she didn't see a future where the two of us would be together and fully satisfied by the relationship we have.
I love physical affection: hugging, kissing, holding hands, etc. It didn't matter whether we were in public or alone, I loved to do it and was clear about that. Around midway between our start as a couple and our breakup, she communicated to me that she didn't like physical affection as much, and in some cases found it mentally and physically draining. I didn't completely understand, and even now can't pinpoint a pattern relating circumstance and desire for physical affection. Nonetheless, I respected her word, and made a point to ask if she was ok with being hugged before I did it.
After she assured me that she had made up her mind, I asked her repeatedly if there were any other factors contributing to her desire to break up, and she assured me that it was only this singular point of contention. She explained that there would be times that I would cross a physical boundary, and when she would pull away, I would make chase like it was some sort of game. And, regretfully, I did think of those interactions as a game, just, not how she did. When she would settle into my arms and press herself against me, I thought it was because I had won her over, as if I had persuaded her to let me have her in my arms. She told me that she submitted because she was tired of constantly having to tell me no. She wasn't enjoying it, and I thought she was.
Saying all of that outright makes our relationship sound so cold and mechanical, right? Well that couldn't be further from the truth.
F and I clicked so easily when we first met. She taught me how to bake, I taught her how to cook her favorite dish, and our senses of humor bounced off of each other infectiously. When I was sick she came to my dorm and fed me. When she came back to our state from the airport after Thanksiving my parents and I drove out to pick her up and fed her lunch before we left to school together. We went from talking to dating so fast that I joked about our scenario being akin to the plot of a romcom anime. Our philosophical views aligned, our ideals in a romantic partner aligned, our sexual preferences aligned. Whenever there was some sort of issue, we would talk about solving it until we were both content with the consensus. We were the couple that our friends took candid pictures of and posted to mutual groupchats saying how we make them feel sick, lonely, and single, and how seeing the two of us together made them feel like "jumping off the 3rd floor balcony of the [Student Union]", I had come to think that we could do anything and go anywhere together, that this was the girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I would jokingly hint about marriage, and she would reciprocate the joke and dig her head into my chest. Things like *points at a picture of old couple on food packaging* "this is literally us, all old and shit together", to which she responded with "yeah, we could do that... grow old together". She told me that she has never felt more content with a relationship in her life, saying that I made her feel so safe and happy.
These are the contents of a card she gave to me on my 19th Birthday (April): "Dear [my name], HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY!!! Thank you for being an awesome cooking partner, lock-in buddy, and most of all wonderful boyfriend. Not a day goes by without you making me laugh. You spark joy in my life, and I truly cannot imagine how every day would be without taking to you or seeing your smile. Thank you for always being there for me. I feel so incredibly grateful and lucky to have gotten to know you during this short year. It really bogggles my mind how one person can be so cute, handsome, passionate, hard-working, talented, and kind. You really are an inspiring person and I could not have asked for a better person to eat with, laugh with, and love every day. Thank you for making my life brighter!..."
I am confident that she enjoyed our time together, I am confident that she was sad about the breakup too, and I am confident that she was always honest when she confided in me.
I don't know if this is pertinent to the conversation, but F's parents are separated, but not divorced. Her father often leaves for "business", and his affairs are an open secret. This development surfaced a few year before I met her, and it emotionally crushed her. Her father was very unloving, and even taught her that "people who want physical affection are just needy". Her parents have also historically been against romantic relationships, and when we revealed that we were dating to her mother at one of F's performances, her mother outright didn't discuss it with her, and refused to talk to her for a short period of time.
She told me she still cares about me, and that she wants to remain friends. I know though that if we were to remain as friends, I wouldn't be able to keep my feelings hidden.
I want to talk about it to people at my school, but I'm not close with any of them like that, and will likely come off as a needy, self-absorbed killjoy. I don't know what to do with myself, and have felt frozen from productivity since this incident. I want to win her back, but know that I shouldn't. I feel so powerless, and I feel so useless, because I know there is nothing I can do now but move on with my life. I don't know what I was hoping for with this post, maybe to just have a wall to cry into?
I fear that I'll never find someone as perfect as her again.
それがあなたの幸せとしても - Spotify
submitted by TransportationAny876 to BreakUps [link] [comments]


2024.05.13 19:06 ShiningRedDwarf Gemini has quite a way to go

Gemini has quite a way to go submitted by ShiningRedDwarf to ChatGPT [link] [comments]


2024.05.13 08:25 Manofathousandface Sector 2814, alien planets, and where the stories normally take place.

Okay so I'm a GL fan, but not in the "I've read a lot if not all of the GL comics" sort of way, mainly because I don't read comics all that often. It's more in a "I've read about and looked up shit loads of info about the character, and watched the animated series (which primarily takes place in space out of Sector 2814) as well as read plenty of comics that GL is in like Justice League" but that's about it.
I barely read comics at all to begin with, so I'm probably missing major gaps in info that the summaries from the wiki pages don't cover.
So my question is this. When a Green Lantern issue is released, and let's say any of the human GL's, are currently stationed in Sector 2814, how often do they just spend time on Earth? How often are they actually dealing with problems on alien planets? Is it true each GL sector houses multiple galaxies? And most importantly, how often do they make up whole alien cultures and actually go in depth with them for story purposes? Is it more often that they have throw away species names and similar such things to just mention but never delve into because they are on the move?
There's probably better ways of wording what I'm looking for here but I'm just at a loss for the scope of this character and their setting. A lot of the more popular shit I've seen takes place around Oa, or Earth, or a specific planet that a lantern corps controls, but I feel like I'm likely missing out on a lot of cool alien planets, characters, and cultures that probably have been written about a lot.
I guess the best way to ask this is what issues should I read that aren't just straight forward Earth, Oa, Mogo stories, and more adventure meeting new faces and people stories. If that makes sense?
Thanks for any feed back. Especially since I feel this is one of my weakest question/posts.
Oh and I don't care about spoilers.
submitted by Manofathousandface to Greenlantern [link] [comments]


2024.05.13 03:12 monk_ty SI Joint shows signs of OA. Any chance my shoulder blade pain could also be arthritis related?

Let me explain my thought process and please let me know if it sounds plausible enough to push for more testing on my shoulder blades.
So I have been dealing with hip pain for about 6 years and have recently got an MRI that shows inflammatory anthrosis on both sides. They also mentioned Bertolotti Syndrome. To me, it seems likely that working in retail for years and the abnormal growth in my L5 could have caused my si joint to wear down faster and cause pain. But I’ve been seeing things linking low grade inflammation and OA and now I’m wondering if some of the other pain in my body (including the the OA in my si joint) is caused by something else in my system.
For the past two or so years, I have had pain in my shoulder blades that would occasionally switch sides, but it recently got a lot worse this past year where I would have continuous pain that would improve with movement, but come back as soon as I stop moving. I saw an ortho about it, but they got an xray of my shoulder, not the shoulder blade, and did some mechanical tests on me. He deemed it scapular dyskinesia and referred me to physical therapy. I unfortunately have not been able to start PT for it yet (currently doing pt for my hip and a recent broken foot) but the pain is just unbearable. I have also had occasional pain in my wrists, knees, and fingers.
I haven’t done pt for my shoulders yet, so I don’t know if I should press for more imaging yet before I try what the ortho recommended. I’m just having problems in so many areas of my body that I feel like something more is going on. The xray on my shoulder came up “in exceptional condition” in his words.
Any advice is appreciated.
submitted by monk_ty to Thritis [link] [comments]


2024.05.13 02:46 throwaweee22 24F4A looking for meaningful friendships /LDR - Dominican Republic - Europe / Online /Anywhere

Hello!
Identity: 24F, asexual, sex repulsed, demiromantic biromantic.
Location: Dominican Republic, I will be pursuing a master's degree in Europe starting this year.
Interests:
Getting lost in music is my favorite way of spending my free time. I like cooking/baking special things when I feel inspired to. Sometimes I get caught up on random rabbit holes of information, I bing read web comics knowing they're incomplete. I like taking pictures, watching the sky and stars; sometimes just standing there, breathing the fresh air at the countryside makes me feel fulfilled. Oh and I write poetry. I also like outdoonature activities such as swimming, running, hiking. It's been years since I had a bike but I want to get back to it.
I don't really play video games anymore. Maybe in the future I'll get back to it. Same with tv shows, I have a long list of things I watched/played in the past, so maybe we could talk about both of these things. And I'd be open to recommendations.
Shows/cartoons I've liked:
Live action: Orphan Black, Teen Wolf, the OA, Sense8, New Girl, Skins, Fleabag, Warrior Nun, Anne with an E, Super Girl;
Animated: Kipo, She-Ra, Inside Job, Arcane, Dragon Prince, Hilda, Violet Evergarden, Edén, The Owl House, Teen Titans, Young Justice, Disenchantment, Harley Quinn, ATLA, LOK, Bocchi the Rock!, Ergo Proxy, Cowboy Bebop, etc.
Games: Life is Strange, The Walking Dead Series, Kirby and Super Mario games, Minecraft, Stardew Valley, GTA, The Sims, Unpacking and Need for speed.
About me:
I'm an ambivert, a private person but I can open up easily, sometimes it happens fast, sometimes it takes time, it depends on the person. I've dealt with anxiety and depression in the past, but nowadays, it's mostly social anxiety that lingers. Still I can function in society and be a good add-on in others lives.
I'm open to talk about things like that and I can be pretty understanding of other's struggles. I don't like being bombed with heavy information without warnings first though.
I don't have my life 100% together, so I don't expect you to be at your "prime" either, but someone with a drive to get and be better would be nice, so we could support and motivate each other to keep thriving. So I can understand if you're struggling or have had in the past. I'm striving for my independence, personal and career growth, and living a peaceful life.
Right now I'm unemployed, I get by trying to be as useful as possible (I live with my family); getting gigs here and there while I find a steady job; I also have various business ideas that I honestly don't know what I'm waiting for to try bring them to life lol; apart from that, I spend time doing things that I like, and every once in a while I enroll in virtual classes, short courses of different things. I live in a sub urban area, and honestly, there's not much to do here besides clubbing (not my thing), eating out, going to the beach or parks. Or maybe there is more and I'm not aware yet lol.
I express my feelings through acts of service, quality time, words of affirmation, compliments and flirts, cuddling and open/honest/healthy communication. I like to communicate and I hate when people leave me hanging on/waiting for answers that never arrive, I like being honest and talking things out, even if it won't work out.
Physically: I'm hispanic, 1.73m tall, average weight. My hair is short but my sense of fashion isn't really masc, nor too femme either lol. I just prefer to dress comfortably, but if things have to get fancy I can get fancy, you'll never see me wearing dresses though. Comfort > looks.
Happy to send pictures and expecting to get them in return, like to put a face to whom I'm talking with, so I would like to exchange pics early on, so if you're too big on anonymity, I don't think we'd be a match. For friends this isn't necessary though but if you want to, I'm fine with it.
Looking for:
you + me 😏🤭 /JK... perhaps?👉🏼👈🏼
I've never been in a relationship but I feel ready to explore that part of myself that I've been neglecting haha. I kind of crave emotional connection and I enjoy cuddling. I put that pink flair but friends are welcomed too.
Friends: anyone between 22-28, sharing things in common or anything at all, I can talk about anything honestly lol.
More than friends: 22-28, who's also looking for something similar; we don't need to have a lot in common, but if we share some interests it would be great; someone who can hold a conversation and communicate openly and with honesty; can get serious or be a silly goose when necessary :v, likes to constantly text/voice chat/video calls. I haven't had any luck finding aces here so I'm open to a LDR, even online for a while, though I would like to close the gap some day, I wouldn't be comfortable with an online relationship forever. Also I will come back to my country for a bit to do some things but I'm open to moving elsewhere depending on a lot of factors, feel free to ask me about this..
I like to communicate and I dislike when people leave me hanging on or waiting for answers that never arrive, specially in the online world. I like being honest and talking things out, even if they don't work out. But I don't chase people who gets hard to reach out to.
Deal-breakers include:
I'm sorry for the length, I always start writing short bits but I'm the type to give as much information as possible lol. I don't leave anything up for imagination XD
Happy to provide more (more !!!? XD) details privately.
If I caught your attention don't hesitate to dm, comment, pm, send me a pigeon or a smoke signal.
See ya!
submitted by throwaweee22 to asexualdating [link] [comments]


2024.05.13 01:26 chronic314 Backlash, parental alienation syndrome and co-construction

https://www.thefreelibrary.com/Backlash%2c+parental+alienation+syndrome+and+co-construction.-a0179570828
Work on the issue of sexual abuse in children and adolescents lays bare the power relations between genders, generations and social classes. The issue of gender is seen in statistics from UN agencies that report that "one in four girls and one in nine boys will be sexually abused before they reach the age of 18."(1) Generational power relations are clear because the perpetrators are adults, and the power relations of class are evident in the backlash generated by powerful sectors that have attempted to prop up the myth that child abuse is only a problem among the poor and working classes.
Webster's Dictionary defines "backlash" as "a strong adverse reaction to a political or social movement." More plainly, backlash is a negative reaction to a positive and constructive step forward. Professor of law John Myers identifies the positive step as the progress made in the past two decades with regard to child abuse and the backlash as the escalation of criticism against professionals involved in child protection.(2)
David Finkelhor was responsible for pioneering work on the sexual abuse of children in the United States. In his 1979 book, Sexually Victimized Children, Finkelhor recognizes the important contributions of the women's movement and professionals involved in child protection lobbying in drawing attention to the realities of sexual violence against minors: "If the sexual abuse of children has risen to prominence as a social problem rather quickly, it is because it has been championed by an alliance of two constituencies by now rather experienced in the promotion of social problems."(3)
In the United States, a backlash began in the 1980s under the Reagan Administration's return to stale and reactionary values following the struggles of the women's movement and the children's rights movement the 1960s and 70s.
What was once secret was now openly debated, and controversy wracked the most idealized institutions, including church, family and school. Socially consecrated myths of long-standing were crumbling: "The home is the seat of love, support and safety for children"; "Good families don't talk about sexuality"; "Churches reflect the highest moral standard with regard to sexuality"; "Children are safe in school."
By drawing attention to the realities of child sexual abuse, a solid blow was dealt to the "powers that be"; hypocrisy was uncovered; and unquestioned assumptions were challenged. This frontal attack was met with denial by means of a range of strategies developed by the fundamentalisms of faith and the market.
One of these backlash strategists was prominent forensics expert Richard Gardner, who coined the term "parental alienation syndrome" in 1985 to describe a supposed psychological disorder that he had observed in lengthy and bitter custody battles. His original paper on the subject uses the following description:
"The term I prefer to use is parental alienation syndrome. I have introduced this term to refer to a disturbance in which children are obsessed with deprecation and criticism of a parent—denigration that is unjustified and/or exaggerated. The notion that such children are merely 'brainwashed' is narrow."(4)
However, supposedly citing his original work several years later, Gardner re-describes this phenomena somewhat differently.
"[t]he parental alienation syndrome (PAS) is a childhood disorder that arises almost exclusively in the context of child-custody disputes. Its primary manifestation is the child's campaign of denigration against a parent, a campaign that has no justification. It results from the combination of a programming (brainwashing) parent's indoctrinations and the child's own contributions to the vilification of the target parent. When true parental abuse and/or neglect is present, the child's animosity may be justified, and so the parental alienation syndrome explanation for the child's hostility is not applicable."(5)
The two different definitions demonstrate the changes in this argument over time with the goal of developing a different strategy for discrediting the hard research work and harder-won social gains of the women's movement and the professionals lobbying for child protection.
Maria Jose Blanco Barea has studied the many works that Gardner published up to his death by suicide in 2003, and she suggests that "perhaps the psychological causes that led to his suicide should be taken into consideration." With regard to Gardner's professional career, Blanco Barea recounts that "Gardner dedicated the first part of his professional life to working as a forensics expert in cases of sexual abuse brought by children against their parents, students against professors, members of the faithful against representatives of organized religions and within military families. Gardner often stressed that he was a former captain [in the U.S. Army Medical Corps] and as a psychologist treated members of the armed forces who had served in Korea. He specialized in techniques to 'deprogram' U.S. soldiers who had been prisoners of war. His methodologies and expert testimony were used to question the credibility of sexual abuse victims, to prove that the accused were innocent and that the accusers were guilty of perjury. Gardner testified in cases of sexual abuse in the context of hearings to determine custody, visitation and guardianship, and he himself explains that he developed his research over the course of his career. In other words, he directly applied the scientific method of trial and error in real-life court cases that were settled while he was still carrying out his research. When he decided to publish his theories in 1985, Garner failed to provide the scientific community with the necessary data to scientifically analyze his conclusions."(6)
Richard Gardner's books were published by Creative Therapeutics, which he himself owned. Some of his articles were published in Issues in Child Abuse Accusations, a publication of the Institute for Psychological Therapies, which is directed by Dr. Ralph Underwager who is well known for an interview in the Dutch journal Paidika […](7)
In the 1970s and 80s and prior to his publication of the parental alienation syndrome, Gardner developed the "Sex-Abuse Legitimacy Scale" (SAL Scale), which he used in his own courtroom testimony. Nonetheless, Gardner's ideological stance clearly shows that he did not view child sexual abuse as a problem, except when it is denounced.
"It is of interest that of all the ancient peoples it may very well be that the Jews were the only ones who were punitive toward [adults who had sex with children]. Early Christian proscriptions against [adult-child sex] appear to have been derived from the earlier teachings of the Jews, and our present overreaction to [adult-child sex] represents an exaggeration of Judeo-Christian principles and is a significant factor operative in Western society's atypicality with regard to such activities."(8)
"The child might be helped to appreciate the wisdom of Shakespeare's Hamlet, who said, 'Nothing's either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.'"(9)
"And her [the mother's] increased sexuality may lessen the need for her husband to return to their daughter for sexual gratification."(10)
"… except for a certain amount of sexual frustration that was not gratified, the four-year-old had not been significantly traumatized by these encounters."(11)
Elsewhere Gardner had the following to say about child sexual abuse: "The sexually abused child is generally considered to be the victim, though the child may initiate sexual encounters by 'seducing' the adult."(12) Gardner even proposes that [child sexual abuse] serves procreative purposes; he maintains that although the child cannot become pregnant, a child who is drawn into sexual encounters at an early age is likely to become highly sexualized and thus will crave sexual experiences during the prepubertal years. Such a "charged up child" is more likely to transmit his or her genes through his or her progeny at an early age. Gardner states: "The younger the survival machine at the time sexual urges appear, the longer will be the span of procreative capacity, and the greater the likelihood the individual will create more survival machines in the next generation."(13) He also recommended that the incestuous father "has to be helped to appreciate that, even today, it [adult-child sex] is a widespread and accepted practice among literally billions of people. He has to appreciate that in our Western society especially we take a very punitive and moralistic attitude toward such inclinations.… He has also had back [sic] luck with regard to the place and time he was born with regard to social attitudes toward [adult-child esx]."(14)
The two definitions of parental alienation syndrome are interesting because the first reveals that the intention of the original strategy was to minimize the devastating effects that child abuse has in the victims. However, the 2002 definition added: "When true parental abuse and/or neglect is present, the child's animosity may be justified, and so the parental alienation syndrome explanation for the child's hostility is not applicable."(15) But curiously, the indicators of parental alienation syndrome also coincide with the indicators of sexual abuse that have been established by international studies on this problem.
At the time of the revised definition, the international study of child abuse and the movement to prevent the victimization of children was much further advanced. Some examples are the five European seminars "Secrets that Destroy" held in 1998 by the Save the Children Alliance; the 1999 "Vision and Reality" reports that address women's and children's rights; and a series of later publications by experts in the matter.
Although the SAL scale has been widely disregarded as a tool for diagnosing sexual abuse, Gardner's real thoughts are evident in the above citations from his works. Both the SAL scale and parental alienation syndrome represent a scandalous violation of the human rights of women, adolescents and children.
In numerous publications, Gardner uses supposedly scientific but paradoxical arguments to rationalize his denial of violence against women, defined in the Belem do Para Convention as "a manifestation of the historically unequal power relations between women and men."(16) Making use of children, he creates a new and sophisticated form of violence against women that involves complicity of the justice system.
Gardner proposed a series of symptoms that reveal three types of parental alienation syndrome (severe, moderate and mild) and specific treatment for each type. The treatment that he proposes for parental alienation syndrome involves both legal and health-care professionals, who Gardner says should have the power to administer the appropriate treatment based on the coercion, threat, change in living arrangements and, as a last resort, the internment and "deprogramming" of the child. As Blanco Barea observes, "Parental alienation syndrome makes a fraud of the law. It makes use of the declarations against discriminations against women and of the rights of the child to protect the parent and escape the application of the Conference of Vienna that protects against torture and degrading treatment, especially in the case of women and girls, and to escape the application of the Convention on the Rights of the Child."(17)
As law professor John Myers explains, "Gardner is an outspoken critic of certain aspects of the child protection system. Apparently, Gardner believes America is in the throes of mass hysteria over child sexual abuse. He writes that 'sex-abuse hysteria is omnipresent' (True and False Accusations of Child Sex Abuse, 1992, p. xxv). In his 1991 book titled Sex Abuse Hysteria: Salem Witch Trials Revisited, Gardner is harshly critical of an unspecified portion of the mental health professionals, investigators, and prosecutors trying to protect children. For example, Gardner accuses some prosecutors of gratifying their own sexual urges and sadistic tendencies through involvement in sexual abuse cases. […] It seems clear that Richard Gardner cannot claim to be balanced or objective when it comes to allegations of child sexual abuse."(18)
Although Gardner and his theories can be questioned for their misogynist and perverse ideology, in Argentina former family court judge Eduardo Cardenas published "El abuso de las denuncias de abuso" (The Abuse of Claims of Abuse) in La Ley, on September 15, 2000. Cardenas's article supported Gardner's theories and sparked backlash in our country, which has provoked widespread reaction among well-known professionals.
Perhaps the best summary of what occurred in Argentina after 2000 is found in the book Maltrato infantil: Riesgos del compromiso profesional (Child Abuse: The Risks of Professional Commitment), a collection of essays by known specialists on the issue, edited by Silvio Lamberti. As the introduction to this book describes:
"As long as the problem was associated with the lower classes, more and more cases were reported. When it began to be suspected that family violence affected all social classes and the middle and upper classes were scrutinized, a reactionary movement used the guise of good intentions to put limits on professionals that supposedly 'abused the reports of child sexual abuse.'
"This was the reaction of:
  1. Fathers who were engaged in custody battles or other legal disputes regarding visitation rights.
  2. Lawyers who preached equanimity and warned against the feminist bias that they claimed had affected the reports.
  3. Experts who tried to pass off the backlash literature from the U.S. as scientific evidence to support their own conclusions.
"This brutal attack tends to carry into an ideological realm a debate that crosses legal and psychosocial discourses, ethics and society as a whole and tries to undo the advances already gained, discouraging those who have worked to achieve these gains. In short, they intend to:
  1. Discredit reports of child abuse.
  2. Turn anyone who denounces abuse into a suspect.
  3. Blur the boundaries between victim and victimizer.
  4. Confuse the matter by citing the rare cases of violence against boys or adult men committed by women.
  5. Discredit the specialized treatment services even though the law recognizes the value of their diagnosis.
  6. Ignore constitutional norms from the Convention on Rights of the Child.
"Thus, the meaning of abusive conduct is inverted, with abuse being attributed to the person who reports the abuse and requests the fulfillment of the law.
"This reactionary backlash supports the persistence of family violence and condemns all girls and/or victims of the perpetuation of incest and abuse while attempting to stymie the legal system and the work of other professionals who until now have born the heavy burden of this process."(19)
This scientific alert went out over three years ago; nonetheless, today there are increasing obstacles to working on this issue. The notion of false reports of abuse is now firmly rooted in the courts. Sexual abuse trials are tremendous ordeals that seriously damage the children and the adults who report the crime and place a heavy burden on the professionals who take the children's part and who often face accusations of malpractice, libel or slander.
The discrediting of psychological experts is of serious concern. What started with Gardner has continued with followers who have discredited indicators, treatments, techniques and prevention campaigns. Brandishing the concept of co-construction on the part of the family members of the victims or the professionals, the testimony of the children is discredited, accused of being childhood fantasy and tale-telling.
The efforts of Gardner and his followers have been echoed by the hierarchy of the Catholic Church, an institution that claims to represent the social sexual moral but which has promoted a policy of smoke-screening sexual abuse.
The Red Latinoamericana de Catolicas por el Derecho a Decidir (Latin American Network of Catholics for the Right to Decide) has undertaken a study on the secret system of sexual abuse within the Catholic Church.(20) The ecclesiastical hierarchy always has been aware of these crimes and has implemented a policy of covering up the abuses committed by priests. This policy is summarized in the following ten points adapted from the studies carried out by the Spanish journalist Pepe Rodriguez(21) and corroborated in the studies of the Catolicas por el Derecho a Decidir:
  1. Discreet investigation of the incident. The prelates of the diocese often have ecclesiastical informants, people who desire to rise in the esteem of the hierarchy through their reports. They keep the bishops abreast of the transgressions of the priests under their authority. These reports are given orally.
  2. Initiation of actions to dissuade the aggressor and/or the victim(s). Once the prelate recognizes the situation of sexual abuse in which the image of the Church could be tarnished, the aggressor is rebuked. Then the bishops dedicate themselves to convincing the victims and their families, assuring them that the aggressor will be punished and that he has repented. They persuade the families to not report the crime so that no one in the Church or the family will suffer the consequences.
  3. Covering up the incident and the identity of the aggressor so the case never becomes public. In this effort, acts are undertaken to confuse the matter, including transferral of the priest to another parish, bribery of the victim and their family members or the use of threats and suspension of benefits (for example, expulsion from school).
  4. Measures to reinforce the cover up. When the case escapes the closed doors of the Church, the hierarch opens an internal investigation against the aggressor to defend against eventual accusations of passivity in case there is external pressure from the media or society or a civil suit. Generally, the investigation is paralyzed indefinitely. At this stage, the priest usually is transferred to another parish, another diocese or another country, depending on the situation.
  5. Denial of the incident when the case becomes public, under the argument that the priest is a man of virtue heeding God's call, a holy figure who could never commit a crime of this nature. When denial is no longer possible, the matter is treated as an exception to this rule.
  6. Public defense of the aggressor, stressing his good service to the Church and his personal merits. If he did do anything wrong, he is profoundly repentant and was not conscious of his acts. An appeal is made to the Christian sentiments of pardoning a repentant sinner.
  7. Public discrediting of the victim(s). Rodriguez uses the metaphor of ants defending an anthill to describe the corporativist attitude of the clergy when one of its members is accused. The guilt is reversed; the victim(s) and/or their family members are blamed.
  8. Paranoiac accusations of the denunciation being linked to campaigns orchestrated by "enemies of the Church." When the number of accusations is so high that discrediting the victims is not enough, the hierarchy complains that there are national or international powers or cults conspiring against the Church.
  9. Possibility of negotiation with the victim. This negotiation frequently occurs before the case is made public when the intention of the Church is to buy the victim's silence to preserve the image of the institution. When there is a public scandal, the hierarchy tries to minimize the damage by trying to negotiate the withdrawal of the accusations against the aggressor.
  10. Protection of the priest/aggressor. When the accused is found to be guilty, the hierarchy stands by him and in some cases even pays him homage or praises him, doing everything possible to erase the incident from the public memory.(22)
As the Church silences and covers up the abuses committed within its institutions, it resembles Gardner and his followers in that it denies the realities of domestic violence and the sexual abuse of children and adolescents and hampers investigation of these matters. Alliances with key judicial figures lead to perverse and scandalous rulings, such as the Melo Pacheco case in Mar del Plata, the Storni case Santa Fe or the stalling in the Grassi trial, to name the most notorious cases. Many others remain anonymous, which demonstrates the existence of a model that favors the impunity of the abusers, the suffering of the victims and the punishment of those who are working within the framework of human rights.
A sturdy thread connects those who deny, discredit, silence, minimize, distort and negotiate the rights of children: the perversity that has subordinated their ethics to systems of belief that are authoritarian, patriarchal and/or favor the domination of adults.
This ideological combination stacks the deck against victims who, for the most part, are children, adolescents and women. Women are the most discredited. In the cases in which priests are accused of sexual abuse, most people take their side, doubt the word of the victim(s) and even blame them or imply that the priests were victims of a conspiracy. Girl victims are not considered credible because they are presented as easily influenced, prone to fantasy or liars. If they are adolescents, their morals are questioned: it is argued that they already had had sexual relations before the abuse or are guilty of seducing their abuser.
In the case of domestic abuse, especially in cases of father-child incest, the mother is accused of maliciously attempting to distance the child from the father, inventing the abuse out of revenge or because she is hysterical or any other argument that serves to safeguard the figure of the father of the family or the Father of the parish. In both cases, the common sensibilities of the population are exploited: tolerance of male sexual behavior fed by the dominate sexual morality, which makes the argument of false reports even more credible than the martyrdom and accusations of the victims.
To compare the consequences that a child may suffer with the separation of his or her parents, even in a messy divorce, with the short- and long-term consequences of father-child abuse is a perverse strategy that denies the serious and profound attack on the victim's subjective integrity, which Jorge Barudy calls "attempted moral murder."
Parental alienation syndrome, the "malicious mother" and co-construction are non-scientific theories, and when used in the context of a trial, they violate the victim's constitutional rights as well as the Convention on the Rights of the Child, CEDAW and other agreements incorporated into our constitution in 1994.
We must remember that Richard Gardner's theories were developed in the United States through a method of trial and error that was applied directly in the courtroom in bitter divorce cases, which were ruled upon as Gardner was undertaking his research. In addition, the U.S. is one of the few countries that has neither ratified nor incorporated into its constitution the Convention on the Rights of the Child or CEDAW.
As Blanco Barea explains, in legal contexts based on human rights, those professionals who can carry out the therapy or treatment recommended by Gardner or his followers (such as "aversion therapy" plus the vicarious treatment of deprogramming and, as a precaution, the guarantee of visitation rights or the reversal of custody and/or total separation of the "alienating" parent and the "alienated" child) "are committing crimes of torture, obstruction of justice and legal fraud, and if they are related to the minors in question, they are also guilty of domestic violence."(23)
Child abuse, especially sexual abuse, is an alarming, universal problem. Increased attention and effective protection skills and prevention measures are necessary at family, local, national and international levels.
After a long tradition of silence, sexual abuse of children is being denounced more frequently and is becoming a topic for public and political discussion.
To alert governments and civil society organizations to the need to play a more active role in the promotion of and respect for the rights of the child (as put forth in article 19 and 34* of the Convention on the Rights of the Child) and to contribute to the prevention of child abuse, the Women's World Summit Foundation, WWSF, launched the World Day for Prevention of Child Abuse in 2000. The Day is commemorated every November 19 together with the anniversary of the International Day for the Rights of the Child (November 20). The objective of the World Day for Prevention of Child Abuse is to rally around the issue of child abuse and the urgent need for effective prevention programs.
To consolidate the global call for action, in 2001 WWSF launched an international NGO coalition that marks the World Day with appropriate events and activities to focus on and increase prevention education.
* For more information, visit the website of the Women's World Summit Foundation, https://www.woman.ch/children/1introduction.php.
* Art. 19 - States Parties shall take all appropriate legislative, administrative, social and educational measures to protect the child from all forms of physical or mental violence, injury or abuse, neglect or negligent treatment, maltreatment or exploitation, including sexual abuse, while in the care of parent(s), legal guardian(s) or any other person who has the care of the child.
* Art. 34 - States Parties undertake to protect the child from all forms of sexual exploitation and sexual abuse. For these purposes, States Parties shall in particular take all appropriate national, bilateral and multilateral measures to prevent:
(a) the inducement or coercion of a child to engage in any unlawful sexual activity;
(b) the exploitative use of children in prostitution or other unlawful sexual practices;
(c) the exploitative use of children in pornographic performances and materials.
The author is a psychologist, a founder of the Casa de la Mujer in Rosario, Argentina, and a longtime defender of the rights of women and children.
Notes
(1.) Selected facts and figures from various UN documents, part of the 2006 Open Letter from the Women's World Summit Foundation on the World Day for Prevention of Child Abuse, 19 November. Available online at http://www.woman.ch/children/1-openletter.php.
(2.) Alicia Ganduglia (2003) "El backlash: un nuevo factor de riesgo," in Maltrato Infantil. Riesgos del compromiso profesional, Silvio Lamberti, ed., Buenos Aires: Editorial Universidad, p. 75.
(3.) David Finkelhor (1979) Sexually Victimized Children. New York: The Free Press, p. 2.
(4.) Richard A. Gardner (1985) "Recent Trends in Divorce and Custody Litigation." Academy Forum 29:2, Summer, pp. 3-7.
(5.) Richard A. Gardner (2002) "Does DSM-IV Have Equivalents for the Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) Diagnosis?" American Journal of Family Therapy, 31(1):1-21. See also Richard A. Gardner (2003) "The Parental Alienation Syndrome: Past, Present, and Future," in The Parental Alienation Syndrome: An Interdisciplinary Challenge for Professionals Involved in Divorce. W. von BochGallhau, U. Kodjoe, W Andritsky and P. Koeppel, eds. Berlin, Germany: VWB-Verlag fur Wissenshaft and Bildung, pp. 89-125.
(6.) Maria Jose Blanco Barea (2006) "El sindrome inquisitorial estadounidense de alineacion parental," p. 11. This document may be downloaded from http://www.revistaiuris.com/MISC/8618/borrador%20el%20sindrome%20inquisitorial%20del%20sap.doc.
(7.) The interview with Dr. Ralph Underwager was originally published in Paidika, Issue 9, 1993, and has been reproduced online at http://www.nostatusquo.com/ACLU/NudistHallofShame/Underwager2.html.
(8.) Richard A. Gardner (1992) True and False Accusations of Child Sex Abuse. Cresskill, New Jersey: Creative Therapeutics, pp. 46-7.
(9.) Ibid. p. 549.
(10.) Ibid. p. 585.
(11.) Ibid. p. 612.
(12.) Richard A. Gardner (1986) Child Custody Litigation: A Guide for Parents and Mental Health Professionals. Cresskill, New Jersey: Creative Therapeutics, p. 93
(13.) Richard A. Gardner (1992) pp. 24-25.
(14.) Ibid. p. 593.
(15.) See note 5.
(16.) From the Preamble to the Inter-American Convention on the Prevention, Punishment and Eradication of Violence against Women, also known as the Convention of Belem do Para, adopted by the OAS General Assembly June 9, 1994; entry into force March 5, 1995.
(17.) Maria Jose Blanco Barea (2006) p. 219.
(18.) John E. B. Myers (n.d.) "What is 'Parental Alienation Syndrome' and Why Is It So Often Used Against Mothers?" an excerpt from a forthcoming book titled A Mother's Nightmare: A Practical Legal Guide for Parents and Professionals. Available online at http://www.gate.net/~liz/fathers/pas.htm.
(19.) Maltrato Infantil. Riesgos del compromiso professional. Silvio Lamberti, ed., Buenos Aires: Editorial Universidad, 2003. The contributing authors were Maria Ines Bringioti, Cristina Caprarulo, Julio Cesar Castro, Alicia Ganduglia, Norberto Garrote, Isabel Gens, Eva Giberti, Carmen Gonzales, Irene Intebi, Victoria Irazuzta, Silvio Lamberti, Patricia Paggi, Mirta Pirozzo, Carlos Rozanski, Diana Sanz, Juan Pablo Maria Viar, Maria Cristina Vila and Juan Carlos Volnovich.
(20.) Regina Soares Jurkewicz (2005) Develando la politica del silencio: Abuso sexual de mujeres por sacerdotes en Brasil. Brazil: Red Latinoamericana de Catolicas por el Derecho a Decidir.
(21.) Pepe Rodriguez (2002) Pederastia en la Iglesia Catolica: Delitos sexuales del clero contra menores: Un drama silenciado y encubierto por los obispos. Barcelona: Ediciones B.
(22.) Regina Soares Jurkewicz (2005) pp. 20-22.
(23.) Maria Jose Blanco Barea (2006) p. 219.
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2024.05.12 17:06 subredditsummarybot Your weekly /r/80sMusic roundup for the week of May 05 - May 11, 2024

Sunday, May 05 - Saturday, May 11, 2024

Top Posts

score comments title & link mirrors
350 79 comments [1986] The MTV Playlist from this very day (5/5) in 1986! What videos were mandatory viewing in the spring of '86?
269 35 comments [1985] Duran Duran released “A View To A Kill” as a single on this day in 1985. It is the only James Bond theme song to have reached number one on the Billboard Hot 100.
206 11 comments Pet Shop Boys - West End Girls [AM] [BC] [Dzr] [SC]
138 19 comments [1984] The Cars - Drive [AM] [Dzr] [SC]
134 22 comments [1982] Missing Persons - Words [Sp] [AM] [BC] [Dzr] [SC]
131 17 comments [1982] The Fixx- One Thing Leads to Another (1982)
127 12 comments The Outfield - Your Love [Sp] [AM] [Dzr] [SC]
106 15 comments The Hooters - All You Zombies [Sp] [AM] [Dzr] [SC]
103 10 comments [1988] Living Colour - Cult Of Personality [Sp] [AM] [BC] [Dzr] [SC]
97 10 comments [1984] Chaka Khan- I Feel for You (1984)
90 10 comments [1985] The Outfield - All The Love In The World [Sp] [AM] [Dzr] [SC]
84 6 comments [1986] Van Halen - Why Can't This Be Love (1986) [Sp] [AM] [BC] [Dzr] [SC]
80 13 comments [1985] Book Of Love - I Touch Roses [Sp] [AM] [Dzr] [SC]
78 13 comments [1986] A-ha - "Cry Wolf" [Sp] [Dzr] [SC]
70 8 comments [1984] RATT - Round And Round [Sp] [AM] [BC] [Dzr] [SC]
 

Most Commented Posts

score comments title & link mirrors
19 33 comments [Discussion :table_flip:] Which 80s singers inspired generations to become singers as far as vocal style is concerned?
47 12 comments [1986] The Billboard Top 20 Music Videocassettes from this very week in 1986! Let's fire up that 'ole vcr and watch some music videos or a cool concert! Actually, there is some really fun stuff here. Which one would you check out?
64 11 comments [1985] Robert Plant - "Little By Little" [Sp] [Dzr] [SC]
43 11 comments [1988] Public Enemy - She Watch Channel Zero [Sp] [AM] [BC] [Dzr] [SC]
13 11 comments Help finding a song with just a few clues.
 
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2024.05.12 08:21 False-Manager39 Vaahvaa / Bateyraa / Bahoo'n (Punjabi words for Many/Enough/A lot)

I've already made a detailed post on all the Punjabi words for More/GreateZyaadaa
This post is for words that mean A lot/Many/Very/Enough
-----------------
Vaahvaa / واہوا / ਵਾਹਵਾ
Urdu/Hindi: Boht / Kaafii / K'haasaa
Used in both Punjabs and is used throughout most dialects. A few Jatki areas may not use it, but as you will see, throughout Jatki/Shahpuri this word is common North West-Punjabi dialects use it. I have first-hand experience from Hindko/Pothohari/Dhanni In the East this is treated as a Majhi word \Malvais and Doabis, please confirm])
Jatki Punjabi Drama: "Vaahvaa Saara Gohst SaTaa Lai-ni, Changgi BaryaaNi PakaavNi Ae" Sargodha Punjabi Vlogger: "Vaahvaa DihaaRay Ho Gaye No" (Kaafi Din Ho Gaye Hai'n) Mandi Bahudin: "Video Vaahvaa Koi Doo'nh-Triiu'nh DihaaRay Diiyaa'n Vehda Pyaa'n" Hafizabad Jatki Punjabi: "Jitthay Aah Vaahvaa PinDaa'n De Chhohr KabaDDi-ShabaDDi KheyDday Paye Haaye" (0:56) Sahiwal Jatki Punjabi: "Gobhi Taa'n Vaahvaa Phull Chaaii-KhaLii Ae" (Chakkii-KhaRii) Mandi Bahudin: "Eh Gall Ae Jado'n Pakkhnu Gallaa'n Karday Haan, Vaahvaa PuraaNi Gall" Eastern Punjabi: "Tey Sukkhaa (Bhangg) Peetaa Hovay Vaahvaa Saaraa" Eastern Punjabi: "Aah Taa'n Vaahvaa Changga Ho Gyaa BhaiNay!" (Boht Achhaa)
Some Phrases:
  1. Vaahvaa Changgaa Hoya! (Sarcasm: HuN Aayii Chass!?)
  2. Vaahvaa Chir Ho Gyaa Vaa (Boht Der Ho Gyii Hai)
-----------------
Western Punjabi: Bateyraa / بتیرا / ਬਤੇਰਾ Eastern Punjabi: Batheyra / بتھیرا / ਬਥੇਰਾ
Urdu/Hindi: Boht / Kaafii / K'haasaa
Mandi Bahudin Jatki Punjabi: "Aah Chhohr-Chhaahr Bateyray Ne" (3:12) Hafizabad Jatki Punjabi: "Unj Taa'n Inhaa'n Kammaa'n Ch Bateyraa Mall Honda Ae" (3:00) Jhangochi Punjabi Drama: "Bateyraa Keetaa Ae, HuN Nhi Meray Kolo'n Honda" Eastern Punjabi, Satinder Sartaaj: "Asii'n Rabb To'n Batheyrii-Vaari Manggay" (Boht Dafa) Sargodha Punjabi Comedy Reel: "Mein Bateyraa Kookyaa Aa'n"
A good phrase:
  1. Bateyrii-Vaarii (Kaafi Dafa/Boht Martaba)
-----------------
Western Punjabi: Bahoo'n / بہُوں / ਬਹੂੰ Eastern Punjabi: Boh / بوہ / ਬਹੁ
Urdu/Hindi: Boht
Jhangochi Punjabi: "Bahoo'n Keetaa Ee?" (Boht Kiiya Hai?) Jhangochi Punjabi: "Ohnu Na Pata Laggay, Oh Bahoo'n DaahDa Ae" Sargodha Punjabi: "Bahoo'n Dukkh Laggaa" Sargodha Punjabi: "Bahoo'n Bhalla Hovay!" Chakwal Punjabi: "Tey Bhukkh Bahoo'n DaahDii Laggi Ae" (Boht Zyaada) Chakwal Punjabi: "Gall SuNo...Bahoo'n Koi Pesay Pichhay Lagg Gaye O?" Pothohari Punjabi: "Oh Yraa Jul! Bahoo'n Gallaa'n Na Kar!" Pothohari Punjabi: "Mein Bahoo'n DaahDaa Pareyshaan Yaa'n, Samjh Nhi AsNi!" Jhang legend Mansoor Malangi: "Bahoo'n Pyaara Lagnaa Ai'n Shafqat Nu!" Coke Studio Famous Song: "Keetaa Mein Tenu Bahoo'n Pyaar Ae" Chachi Attock Dialect: "Bahoo'n SohNaa" (Boht K'hoobsurat) Punjabi Drama: "Tenu Taa'n MuRHkay (Paseenaa) Bahoo'n Lahnday Payin!"
East Majhi Good Speaker: "Social Media Da Jamaana Vaa Gall Boh Shheyti Pheldi Aa" Eastern Punjabi Singer Nirvair Pannu: "Boh Vaddhiiya!" (Boht Khoob) Eastern Punjabi: "Boh Boh Svaagat Aa Saaryaa'n Bhraavaa'n Nu" (Theth Punjabi is not Svaagat, it's Jee-Aayaa'n-Nu, used in both Punjabs)
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2024.05.11 23:39 monk_ty SI Joint OA Diagnosis 26[F]. Anything to keep in mind while finding my new normal?

I have been dealing with pain in my hip for about 6 years now, starting around 2018. I’ve been to the doctor many times and just finally got an MRI done the other day.
Apparently I have Bertolotti syndrome, moderate inflammatory arthrosis of the left SI Joint and minimal inflammatory arthrosis of the right SI Joint. Mention of moderate subchondrial marrow edema and sclerosis on left si joint as well as the pseudoarticulation point (idk man) and the same on the right only minimally.
I’ve been trying to research how to manage my pain and live as pain free as possible over the years, but I never thought it’d be OA. I am currently seeing a PT who’s helping me with a healing broken foot and managing my hip in the meantime as well. I also got a referral to see a hip ortho.
I wanted to know if there’s anything in your experience that I should keep in mind when trying to get help for this over the short and long term. I am trying my best to research as much as possible, but I wonder if there are things I don’t even know to consider. I struggle with terrible pain in both ahoulder blades and the occasional knee pain, so I’m wondering if there could also be an inflammatory arthritis involved as well?
I’m open to any insight, or word of encouragement. I’m not falling apart mentally yet (plenty of that over the past 6 years of not knowing what’s wrong) but it’s still hard to hear.
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2024.05.11 19:14 Lower_Masterpiece_47 Passed C777 - Web Development Applications

I usually don't post or offer advice; however, I decided to do so because this was by far the hardest class in my entire degree plan. I transferred in credits that I had from my associate's degree, so I skipped the prerequisite class for C777. This was a major issue for me because I did not know or remember a single thing about HTML, CSS, or JavaScript. That being said, this caused a lot of stress and truly forced me to apply myself and learn the material. In every class I took, I really did not have to study too hard due to real-life experience or past knowledge on the subjects, this class humbled me. You will absolutely need to learn the material in order to pass the objective assessment.
I studied for about a month, probably around 20-25 hours in total. I scheduled the OA and failed by only a few questions, which was very discouraging. The instructor made me do a study plan which consisted of flashcards, videos, and quizzes. This did help me get over the hump, and I passed on my second attempt. Make sure you look at how the OA is graded/weighed. I did not focus to much on the in between things such as API and forms and ultimately lead to me failing the first attempt.
What I used to study was I started by watching Traversy Media on youtube. This helped me remember what little I knew and helped learn the basics of HTML,CSS, JS. If you learn better by watching videos this is a must. Here are the links to the videos:
HTML Crash Course For Absolute Beginners,
CSS Crash Course For Absolute Beginners,
JavaScript Crash Course For Beginners.
I did read/skim through the course material. Many people say the course material is not useful, I disagree with that. Although the material does not come close to covering everything you need to know it was still useful for my OA.
After that, I used the quizzets (not quizlets) that my instructor sent in the welcome email. I would take the practice finals and it will generate a new test each time. Review the questions you miss and make sure you are not just remembering the answer to the question but actually knowing why the answer is the answer.
I did not use the study guide as I do not learn well that way. I learn better by watching videos and taking practice tests. I did take the PA twice although they say its not a good indicator to pass, I thought it is super helpful. The OA felt like a harder version but still fairly similar. The OA did seem to have a few "gotcha" questions by wording things differently.
Lastly, it did help me to copy certain html, css, js code that were hard to grasp and paste them and alter them inside a live environment, that way I could see the different outcomes and helped me visualize the questions being asked better.
If you feel that you are close to being ready but not sure if you are fully ready to take the OA, go ahead and take it! I feel like taking it the first time helped me not feel so nervous as I now knew what to expect.
Do not listen to the horror stories on here about people dropping out and failing due to this class being so hard. Listening to some of the people on here tell horror stories added unnecessary stress to the course. It is a very hard class but anyone can pass it if you study.
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2024.05.11 08:42 Trick_Minimum3190 About Her Voice: A conversation on Mariah Carey with author and critic Andrew Chan

About Her Voice: A conversation on Mariah Carey with author and critic Andrew Chan
About Her Voice A conversation on Mariah Carey with author and critic Andrew Chan BY DANIELLE AMIR JACKSON DECEMBER 21, 2023
Photo by Raph_PH via Flickr. Artistic rendering by Oxford American. Courtesy Wikimedia Commons This exclusive feature is an online extension of the OA’s annual music issue. Order the Ballads Issue and companion CD here.
Singing is “the most enigmatic of performing arts,” the author, editor, critic, and self-professed “diva lover” Andrew Chan writes. It’s a simple matter of air and anatomy: breath moves through closed vocal folds which then vibrate and resound throughout the throat, chest, head, or sinuses. But when we listen intently, transcendence is available to us. Raised hairs on the upper arm, a tingle on the back of the neck. The irrepressible urge to tap one’s toes. Transcendence is something we can feel–a physical sensation that unleashes the emotions and connects us to the divine. That’s why a host of spiritual traditions embrace the human voice as a conduit for worship, and in secular music, many of the most popular traditions–r&b and its variants, country, even rap—foreground some sort of vocal virtuosity. A skilled vocalist can “seduce us, haunt us, heal us regardless of the text they’re delivering or even the culture that surrounds them,” Chan writes.
In his first book, published just this past fall, Chan highlights the thirty-plus year career of Mariah Carey, whose five-octave vocal range; agile, multisyllabic melisma; and well-honed aptitude for catchy hooks and witty wordplay turned her into one of the most successful pop singer-songwriters of all time. Carey has earned five Grammys and nineteen number ones on the Billboard pop chart—the highest of any act besides the Beatles, surpassing Elvis. Two of her fifteen full-length albums are certified diamond, with sales of ten million or more in the United States alone. Why Mariah Carey Matters, part of the University of Texas Press’s Music Matters series, is the first book-length critical assessment of the artist’s wide-ranging career.
Chan makes the case that from the beginning, Carey’s vocal dexterity and range set her apart—her mastery at blending piercing whistle tones, fluttery, feminine whispers, muscular belts, and “leathery low” notes, often within the same song. “There’s something irrational, bizarre, and hazardous-sounding about the way Mariah hopscotches over and across vocal registers without warning or transition,” Chan writes. She also blended and mixed styles of singing, infusing both big, sentimental ballads and buoyant, weightless bops alike with gospel fervor; in the ’90s, alongside artists like Mary J. Blige and Jodeci, she contributed to the creation and commercial dominance of “hip-hop soul.” In her house remixes, often painstakingly re-recorded versions of her mainstream pop hits, she frequently scatted and improvised in the tradition of Ella Fitzgerald or Sarah Vaughan. Equally impressive, and critical in understanding Carey, Chan says, is her “artistry outside the vocal booth.” She wrote or co-wrote all of her most enduring hits, including “Vision of Love,” “We Belong Together,” and “All I Want for Christmas Is You.” She’s produced herself and other artists, and is one of few women nominated for the Grammy Award for Producer of the Year (Non-Classical). It was an early honor, from 1992, for work on her second LP, Emotions.
Chan is one of my favorite writers and an important voice in contemporary music and film criticism. He’s vivid in his assessment of Carey’s musical gifts. He layers in details of his own upbringing to help us understand why certain songs and singers turned him into a student of the art. I love the way he brings the reader along with him—we’re watching and listening together as Carey delivers her gospel-drenched rendition of “America the Beautiful” on the NBA Finals in 1990, hearing her sing the climactic sea-ahhh as she “evokes rolling vistas and open water.” He acknowledges the blemishes on Carey’s career and the unpredictability of her voice, which he insists is not a recent phenomenon. He situates Carey in refreshing context: with Black singers of the ’80s who influenced her sound, and with other female songwriter-producers like Patrice Rushen, Teena Marie, and Angela Winbush, who don’t often receive credit for their prowess behind the boards.
“So much of the culture and money created during this era is the product of Black female creative energy,” writes Danyel Smith, another of my favorite music writers, in Shine Bright, her sweeping history of Black women in American pop. She’s talking about the middle of the twentieth century, when recordings like the Dixie Cups’ “Chapel of Love” achieved mammoth success that the performers—who came up with the arrangement we all know and love—were not credited for. Carey has received commercial rewards, and, as of late, critical adoration from outlets such as Pitchfork and Rolling Stone.
But Chan suggests we still haven’t absorbed the magnitude of Carey’s genius, that our cultural blinders have hindered our ability to understand the breadth of her labor and mastery. Carey’s upbringing as a biracial daughter of a white mom who raised her largely on her own; her sense of not fully belonging among Black or white people; her insistence on femininity in an industry that privileges masculine presentation when it doles out points for credibility. She used it all in her art—especially in her ballads. Over a long and wide-ranging conversation, Chan and I discussed Carey’s melancholy, artistic lineage, the feeling of singing, r&b, gospel, and transcendence.
Courtesy University of Texas Press Danielle Amir Jackson: Can we start with your background? I know you grew up in some American suburbs and in Malaysia. When did you begin to pay so much attention to Mariah Carey?
Andrew Chan: I moved around quite a bit as a kid. I was born in Minneapolis, in a great music city, but I didn’t live there long. My family moved to Tampa, Florida and then to Malaysia. After moving back to the States, I lived in Atlanta, Georgia and Charlotte, North Carolina—the metropolitan New South.
In the nineties.
In the nineties. I moved to Atlanta… I think in ’97. I remember Butterfly had just come out. And I remember Usher was number one on the charts with “You Make Me Wanna…” Living in Atlanta and Charlotte in the nineties, I was one of the few Chinese Americans in school. For much of middle school and early high school, half of my friends were Black. So, there was a lot of exposure to the music that they were listening to. Hip-hop and r&b were becoming mainstream and dominating the charts. Having friends who were Black exposed me to more than just what was crossing over.
I also felt connected emotionally to Malaysian culture. My parents exposed me to some of the great Asian divas of the eighties and nineties. Mandarin and Cantonese pop were important for me until, maybe, first grade. So, I was listening to people like Anita Mui, Priscilla Chan, and Teresa Teng and was completely obsessed with them before I had much knowledge of American pop music. Even then my ear was attuned to how different they sounded. Anita Mui had this beautiful contralto voice. Teresa Teng was more of a mezzo soprano. And they had different vocal approaches. Even if I didn’t have the language to analyze that or express that at that age, I was really drawn to the variety of women’s singing. That fascination carried over to the period when I started becoming obsessed with American pop music and American divas, mainly through Whitney and Mariah. When I heard “I Will Always Love You” and the whole Bodyguard era, I’d never heard something like that before. That drew me to the soul tradition of American singing.
I don’t often hear people discuss Carey in the lineage of great American interpreters of ballads like Ella Fitzgerald or Frank Sinatra, and I really appreciate that it’s the note you lead with in your book—which parallels the way that Carey started her career. The OA’s annual music issue is a dive into ballads and the elasticity of the form. What’s special about ballads? Why might an artist like Carey launch her career with ballads?
Even though she became frustrated with Tommy Mottola molding her into an adult contemporary ballad singer, the demo was full of ballads. She co-wrote all those songs. She found different ways of making the ballad fresh and interesting for herself.
The ballad has always meant different things across time. If you were to compare Sinatra, singing an old jazz standard ballad like “Angel Eyes” or “In the Wee Small Hours of the Morning,” what does that have in common with Mariah Carey’s “Can’t Let Go?” They’re slow. They’re about passionate love. This does a couple of things for a singer: It gives you space to really milk every note and moment; the listener is drawn into the space of the ballad and is invited to listen very closely in a way that you just aren’t if you’re competing with an up-tempo beat behind you or if you’re singing fast. The feat is more about rhythm than it is about holding out long notes. The ballad accentuates the tone of the singer’s voice. It creates an intimate connection with the listener. It also puts the singer at risk of being uncool because ballads are kind of forbidden. And that is why we love them. They can be uncool. They almost feel like something that we shouldn’t admit we listen to or respect because they, especially the sad ones allow us to wallow, which we’re not supposed to do if we’re grownups and we want to be serious and mature. We’re not supposed to sink into our feelings of longing and despair. But this is one of the places in our culture where we get access to that intensity of emotion, and the slowness of the music mimics the infatuated person’s inability to let go of love or inability to stop thinking about the beloved.
Mariah is an unabashedly sentimental singer, and that’s why it took so long for her to garner any kind of critical respect. She is in that tradition of musical wallowers. She loves her heartache. She loves to long and pine. She’s a bit of a masochist.
Many interesting people are.
Yeah. Ballads can be transportive to sing. The tempos are slower; you can really get your mouth around the words and feel each one of them. Because the song isn’t whizzing by at a crazy pace, you can build to a satisfying climax. You can go from low to high in this drawn-out, dramatic way. That shows the full capabilities of your voice.
When you say ballads are transportive, are you talking about a transcendent experience? The Holy Ghost?
A little bit. It’s to the point where you’re moving with your own performance, which is why singers sometimes get choked up when they’re singing their ballads, because it is such a vulnerable place to be. In karaoke, which most people don’t take seriously, if I’m singing a particular song and I’m really feeling it, I can get so lost in it.
“She loves her heartache. She loves to long and pine. She’s a bit of a masochist.”
ANDREW CHAN
I like what you said about ballads being almost contraband. I remember when people realized Beyoncé was starting the Renaissance tour with slow songs. It seemed almost like an anachronism.
Yeah, for her big house record. She’s a great ballad girl too. In terms of them being contraband, back in the Maoist era in China, love ballads were banned because they were seen as counterrevolutionary. If you were part of the revolution, you wouldn’t indulge in these individualistic displays of your own personal emotions. I do get into that a little bit in the book where I even had a moment in my teenage years where I was just like, These are pathetic. They’re a distraction from the real business of politics and liberation and revolution, you know?
We include a song by Fannie Lou Hamer on our compilation accompanying the issue. You made me think of Elaine Brown, who was chair of the Black Panther party and recorded songs and some of them are balladlike. They’re propagandist, one-note songs.
There is the political ballad too. I think there’s something about love ballads where it’s like surrendering and succumbing to feelings of longing, loss, yearning, desire. Of course, there’s misogyny involved in that too, because these are “feminized” emotions. Ideas about feminine hysteria are built into this hyperbolic style of singing as well. People forget that Whitney was booed and disrespected for much of her career. It’s funny that she and Mariah had a reappraisal where they’re legends now, but at the beginning of their careers, they were criticized for over-singing and being excessive.
I wonder why people didn’t say that about Luther Vandross. He’s super indulgent.
He’s so indulgent. “A House is Not a Home” or “Superstar”—those songs are seven minutes long or something. He had some pop crossover appeal, but he never hit it as big as Whitney and Mariah. But also, there’s a bit of misogyny in that, the difference between women doing it and men doing it. I mean, Al Green is a show-off. They’re all show-offs.
Let’s talk about the eighties. You say that “Can’t Let Go,” is a revision of “Make It Last Forever” by Keith Sweat and Jacci McGhee and compare Carey’s work as a songwriter-singer-producer to Teena Marie and Angela Winbush. And you go into quite a bit of depth into all her references and homages in Glitter: Indeep, Zapp, Cherrelle. I’m having a moment right now—perhaps I’m where Mariah was back in ’99 and 2000—but I’m so obsessed with the sounds and sights of the Black ’80s. Miki Howard, whom you also mention, has been heavy on my mind, alongside Anita Baker, Patrice Rushen, Regina Belle. In your opinion, what was special about that era in music, particularly in Black pop, and how was it connected to Carey’s debut?
I didn’t come into writing this book as an expert in eighties Black music. That is one of the areas where I felt a bit insecure because I felt I knew sixties and seventies r&b and nineties onward in terms of r&b, but for some reason the eighties were an area that I hadn’t explored sufficiently. I knew the major names and their works, but it is a decade that, when it comes to Black popular music, it’s so defined by one-hit wonders. Aside from the Whitneys and the Michael and Janet Jacksons and Lionel Richies, there weren’t a lot of a long-lasting careers that crossed over to non-Black audiences in a major way. Sometimes, DeBarge would have a pop hit, but for most of their significant catalog, mostly Black listeners were listening. I had to do a lot of catching up to get those sounds into my ears and really hear how they influenced Mariah. I think part of it is because eighties r&b is less canonized than the seventies and nineties. Even the nineties have experienced this resurgence of critical interest, but the eighties are almost like a blip. Part of it is where it came in the history of popular music—after the demise of disco, which really was a shaming of Black music by the white rock establishment. I’m sure it’s more complex than that, but that was certainly a dimension to that whole culture war. In the eighties, you have r&b coming out of the ashes of disco and utilizing the electronic elements that disco had been criticized or seen as superficial for. You get a lot of experimentation like Zapp—so kooky and goofy. The use of the talk box to manipulate vocals. You get club music, like Cherrelle, a sort of post-disco dance music, people having a lot of fun. Just like really deep grooves that went on for like six minutes. Gap Band, all that kind of stuff.
There’s the kind of fun side of eighties r&b, but then on the other side you have this luxuriousness, the plush textures of Quiet Storm, which began in the seventies, but really came into its own commercially in the eighties with people like Luther, Anita Baker—who sort of took the slow-roasted, slow-jam, boudoir sound of Isaac Hayes and Al Green and Smokey Robinson—and pushed it to a whole new level. Even when they were singing at the tops of their lungs, it was still smooth.
I hesitate to just generalize all eighties r&b, but I see those as the two parallel tracks. I think they both deeply informed Mariah’s aesthetic. I think Aretha is a huge influence on pretty much all r&b women singers. I think Mariah would cite her as the ultimate female influence, but I think when it comes to sonics, the luxuriousness, the Quiet Storm sound is so evident in songs like “Underneath the Stars” and “Fourth of July.” Those are what you would think of as Quiet-Storm Mariah, but you [also] hear it in the stuff that’s more hip-hop like “The Roof.” The way she’s stacking her vocals, the way she’s creating texture with her voice. It’s very Luther. The way she is manipulating her voice, the way she’s showing it off but not for its own sake, but to create an environment that you sort of wrap yourself in. When I think of Luther showcases like “Superstar” or “Forever, for Always, for Love,” it’s very much like some kind of texture that you can wrap yourself.
This is quite different from the approach of the belters of the sixties and seventies, like Aretha or even Gladys or Chaka, powerful singers who really prioritized the belt. Mariah is a phenomenal belter—one of the greatest. Where she really distinguishes herself from other divas of her time is the subtler parts of her voice. I think a lot of that is influenced by Quiet Storm. When it comes to the zanier side of eighties r&b, you hear it in her sense of humor, her effervescence, especially as she became more of a jokester lyrically in her later years. You can sort of hear the lyrical experimentation and the kind of devil-may-care attitude of eighties Black music.
One of my favorite live performances of Carey’s is where she sings “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” and “If Only You Knew,” her Patti Labelle homage. I love that era in her voice where there is that level of rasp.
That performance—it’s very eighties Patti. “If Only You Knew” is so eighties. I think Mariah’s samples, too, are so interesting and root her in the time of her youth. She’s such a radio-head, the way she talks about listening to the radio in her memoir and her devotion to soaking up all those sounds. That was before streaming, where you really had to be glued to the radio. I don’t know if she had MTV back in the day, but the radio was the thing. And she wasn’t just listening to r&b. She was listening to Pat Benatar. The range of her musical references is so fascinating.
I’d love to discuss Carey’s gospel moments. You spend a great deal of time on her rendition of Dottie Peoples’ “Jesus, Oh What a Wonderful Child” and note that while Carey didn’t grow up in the Black church, she joined one as an adult. What’s Mariah’s connection to the gospel of the ’90s? I’m thinking of artists like BeBe and CeCe Winans or Commissioned?
I love gospel music, but I would never claim to know it. I love gospel music because that’s where r&b comes from. R&b is my portal into gospel music. It remains the source of so much great singing, even today. Le’Andria Johnson is one of my favorite singers alive. In terms of Mariah and gospel, I think it is so interesting to me that she didn’t grow up in a Black church and yet was so committed to singing in a gospel style, even from the beginning. There may not be songs that feel explicitly gospel on the debut album, but you do have moments. “There’s Got to Be a Way” has a gospel choir that feels kind of in the style of BeBe and CeCe Winans. That pop, commercial gospel that was happening in the late eighties and nineties—the kind of gospel that you would hear in Sister Act 2. Then she employs background singers like Kelly Price and Melonie Daniels—virtuosos of that sound.
In the book, you note that Kelly Price had been trained by Mattie Moss Clark.
Yes, I found that in a video of Kelly Price. She talked about doing some kind of workshop with Mattie Moss Clark when she was younger. [Carey’s] commitment to surrounding herself with not just skilled r&b background vocalists, who could do a commercial sound, but vocalists like Kelly Price and Melonie Daniels, who could bring a church sound, specifically a COGIC sound to her music is completely fascinating to me. The Clark Sisters were playing on r&b radio back in the seventies. Gospel had been having these kinds of crossover moments, but Mariah’s knowledge of the music surpasses just knowing “Oh, Happy Day” or “You Brought the Sunshine.” She was listening to Vanessa Bell Armstrong. From the very first album in interviews, she is citing Vanessa Bell Armstrong and the Clark Sisters as influences.
I have to think that in her teens, she had been exposed to gospel music. I’m fascinated that she came to the music and absorbed its influence without having a longstanding background in the Black church. I bring this up, not so much as a point about appropriation, but more as another example of Mariah being someone obsessed with records and listening to music and soaking up any influence she could find, whether it was Journey—when she covers “Open Arms”—or gospel or hip-hop or what have you.
To go back to gospel and “Jesus, Oh What a Wonderful Child,” she has moments where she wears her gospel influence on her sleeve even before that. “Anytime You Need a Friend” was one of the most significant gospel moments; she’s singing with a choir behind her and doing a lot of riffing and running and belting in the way of the great COGIC singers. “Jesus, Oh What a Wonderful Child” is significant because it sounds live. I read somewhere that it was recorded live in a church. The vamp is unlike anything that had come in her discography before. It is a gesture toward a kind of gospel authenticity. It’s no longer just gospel-pop. It’s going there and trying to recreate the spirit and the atmosphere and the feeling of a live gospel setting.
I’m interested in her study of gospel as an example of her being a constant and abiding student of different forms of Black music. I love her later gospel songs like “Fly like a Bird,” “I Wish You Well,” and “Heavenly” where she combines a James Cleveland song with a Mary Mary song. There is a song called “I Understand” that’s one of those multi-megastar performances. There’s Rance Allen, Kim Burrell, and Mariah does just whistle at the very end.
Do you think Mariah is fundamentally an r&b artist?
We first have to acknowledge that genres are constructs. These terms have historical origins that are usually rooted in marketing and promotion. Most people track [r&b] to the 1940s. It replaced race music as the designation or the category for whatever African Americans listened to that was popular music. It’s a shifting signifier. The idea that there is a commonality between the music of Ray Charles and Lavern Baker and Fats Domino and Mariah and SZA—all these artists sound so different. I think there is something a little bit unhelpful about these genre markers.
That being said, constructs take on their own reality for people who engage with them. For Mariah, and her listeners who gravitate to the r&b side of her catalog, r&b represents something. It’s as different as the music has become over the decades. There are still certain stylistic and sonic continuities. It’s very improvisational. There is melisma, runs. In classical music, you perform it as its notated. Melisma defies notation. You can sing so many notes so fast that you can’t really even transcribe it. It’s rooted in gospel. It’s rooted in a certain passion for delivery, a centrality of the voice and individual expression. An idea about struggle and transcendence, because it’s rooted in the Black experience and an acknowledgement that life is sometimes totally unbearable, and music is a vehicle to help you get over, to get through. People who gravitate to r&b are connecting with that.
Of course, not every r&b song is about that. But even in a slow jam, you can hear that whining, that struggle, that tension. You hear all these elements in Mariah’s discography. For her, r&b became, at a certain point in her life, a way of expressing her Black identity, which had been dismissed or misrepresented or misunderstood. She was constantly asked about her race in interviews, constantly having to remind people of what she had said from the very beginning, that her father was Black and Venezuelan, and her mother was Irish American. Embracing r&b as her heritage was an important part of her owning her identity as a Black woman. R&b is so interesting as a cultural and political marker, because now we’re in an age where white artists like Justin Bieber or Justin Timberlake, or whoever, say that they’re r&b. I’m less interested in saying, “This person’s not r&b; this person is,” and more interested in what is it that makes people so desperate to align themselves with this genre. I think it’s the historical lineage—the gravity of the heritage. It’s the connection to the idea of soul, which is a spiritual idea.
I’m not sure if any artist can be definitively anything when it comes to genre. But I think certainly Mariah perceives herself as an r&b artist and has conducted her artistic life in a way that shows that she’s committed to a certain ideal of what r&b is—passionate, soulful singing; a connection to music as a form of spirituality.
“Even in a slow jam, you can hear that whining, that struggle, that tension.”
ANDREW CHAN
You have this part of the book where you’re talking about her covers of power rock anthems. You don’t say that she’s reappropriating, but you say she’s showing how permeable rock and r&b boundaries are. They have a shared origin, and they come together in her choices of what to cover and what to sing and how to sing them and her arrangements.
For sure. If you think about Foreigner’s “I Want to Know What Love Is” that she covers, that’s an instance of a white band bringing gospel influence into a rock song. These boundaries are always permeable. Rock at one point was called r&b when it was sung by Black artists. What she demonstrates with her music is the variety within r&b and that the music is not a monolith. She’s giving you quiet storm. She’s giving you girl-group songs. She’s giving you New Jack Swing. She’s giving you hip-hop soul. She’s giving you power ballads. She’s giving you deep soul, in the tradition of Aretha with “Mine Again.” She is committed to a vision of herself as an r&b artist, but for her it is many things.
All the things you were saying about the struggle and resilience r&b signifies—I think that’s also reflective of the queerness that many sense in a lot of Mariah’s songs.
Absolutely. One song I want to write about is “Ain’t No Way.” Carolyn Franklin wrote that. I don’t know if we know definitively if she was queer, but I think all the history kind of shows that she was. There’s definitely a [queer] reading of that song. You have Luther as a queer artist and Sylvester, so many of the pioneers of the r&b. Little Richard. It makes sense because gospel was pioneered by queer people. Otherness and survival, the longing for transcendence is something so baked into the music. That’s certainly what I was responding to as a young closeted gay child, who’s experiencing racial otherness in the American South as well. Obviously, my experience is very different from Mariah’s, but I think there’s a longing to transcend the arbitrariness of what oppresses us through sound.
And she does transcend and break through.
She achieves it. What is beautiful about a Mariah Carey ballad is that she takes you into the depths of despair, sorrow, but through the sheer beauty and power and mastery of her voice, she is carrying us over. No matter how sorrowful or despairing it gets—and some of them really are quite dark and fatalistic—there’s something about the voice. The voice can be the vehicle that carries you over.
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2024.05.11 08:19 ViridianWizard Silence pays off in the western world.

Silence pays off in the western world. submitted by ViridianWizard to AttorneyTom [link] [comments]


2024.05.11 00:22 ildrinktothatbro David says actions speak louder than words

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2024.05.11 00:00 ARandomAccount246 There's nothing wrong with Bill Cipher's multiversal scaling.

I'm gonna briefly go over and debunk the main/only arguments against it.
"He isn't multi+ because vague statements don't scale anywhere, a president isn't country level just because he's a threat to a country."
This is a false analogy, a president wouldn't be country level because he can't directly destroy a country without nukes nor can he even reach the range of one with his own power, that is in no way at all related to how Weirdmageddon works.
As for proving that it means so in a destructive sense, this makes it pretty clear that the show at least intends for Bill to be a threat in cataclysmic way.
"The Rift isn't something Bill controls, it's a consequence of his existence"
It's absolutely tied back to him, it's the rift that he created, the rift that he sustains, and the rift that immediately closes when he dies. Not to mention that all of his own reality warping is undone with the closure of the rift, and as a bonus: In Gravity Falls Lost Legends, which is considered canon (ish) by Alex Hirsch, has a statement outright confirming the rift was closed because of his death. (It also has Ford describe the leftover rips as Multi-Dimensional in that same scan)
"He isn't multiversal because of [Insert Anti-Feat here]"
Oh boy, this is gonna be a big one to tackle, but luckily it's easy to debunk with one simple point: Nobody is arguing that Bill is multiversal SPECIFICALLY during the time he was trapped inside the barrier, nor are they arguing him to be so when he was still trapped inside the dreamscape. They are arguing him to be so if he broke out of the Gravity Falls barrier, if he was able to actually spread Weirdmageddon outside of a small town. The entire reason a plot was even possible to make once Bill turned into a 3D being is because he was never allowed to actually reach his full potential/power.
Pay attention to this scene, Ford refers to the barrier as "Gravity Falls natural law of weirdness magnetism" which tells us that it's a barrier that specifically exists to attract and contain entities like Bill.
So what does this mean exactly? It means that nearly every single anti-feat used as an argument against Bill's high-ends are invalid, the most you can get out of them is that Bill has bad Battle IQ due to how long it took for him to destroy the Shacktron, but even then I don't blame him when that mech was also protected by a barrier specifically designed to negate his powers, wtf are you supposed to do when your opponent is just immune to your abilities? And him falling for Ford's plan was also mostly due to his ego and underestimation of humans (Which tbf IS still a valid weakness to exploit in some scenarios) rather then him genuinely not having a basic idea on how to fight.
These aren't arguments towards a full-powered Bill, they are arguments against a Bill handicapped by a barrier that specifically exists to trap beings like him, which....sure, I guess you can argue they are still valid anti-feats if we were to use Bill during the time he WAS restricted to make a matchup against weaker characters fair, but we aren't judging characters based on what they can't do when they aren't at their full power right? Because otherwise we could make the same arguments against other characters like:
"Goku wouldn't be multiversal if he never got his SSG form"
or
"The Ben 10 Chronosapien Time Bomb wouldn't be multiversal if it never went off"
or
"Superman wouldn't be multiversal if you trapped him in a room full of Kryptonite"
No shit, if you put characters in scenarios where they can't perform their best feats then they can't perform their best feats, crazy how that works isn't it?
Oh, and he isn't featless either btw, Bill was the strongest entity in the Nightmare Realm who one-shotted the Time Baby who was destroying the world in the future and is described as a "Time-Devouring" entity in one of the GF documents. (Sort of like Culex from Mario)
Conclusion:
So with all that being said, I think it's pretty safe to say Bill Cipher's scaling still holds up due to the GF Cosmology being solidly Multi+ to 5D thanks to these scans, with an argument for 7-11D based on how you interpret the pan-dimensional beings. (Personally, i'm neutral about it since those aliens being weak doesn't necessarily mean that destroying those upper dimensions would be fodder, but at the same time we don't even know if those were 7-11D beings in the transcendental sense, because Gravity Falls uses the word "dimension" interchangeably so it could just be referring to different universes, and I would just say that scaling is an overall highball but you do you.)
Also, sorry if I sounded a bit overly sarcastic during the end, I just hope I got my point across, but anyways yeah, that's all for today guys, thanks for reading this.
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2024.05.10 16:44 madscientist174 Friday, May 10, 2024 Non-Real-Time Meeting of OA

Welcome to this non-real time meeting of Overeaters Anonymous! I’m madscientist174. I’m a compulsive eater and your leader for this meeting. Will those who wish, please join me in the Serenity Prayer: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.
Overeaters Anonymous is a Fellowship of individuals who, through shared experience, strength, and hope, are recovering from compulsive overeating. We welcome everyone who wants to stop eating compulsively. There are no dues or fees for members; we are self-supporting through our own contributions, neither soliciting nor accepting outside donations. OA is not affiliated with any public or private organization, political movement, ideology, or religious doctrine; we take no position on outside issues. Our primary purpose is to abstain from compulsive eating and compulsive food behaviors and to carry the message of recovery through the Twelve Steps of OA to those who still suffer.
Our Invitation to You
The Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous
Abstinence in Overeaters Anonymous is the action of refraining from compulsive eating and compulsive food behaviors while working towards or maintaining a healthy body weight. Spiritual, emotional, and physical recovery is the result of living the Overeaters Anonymous Twelve Step program.
The OA tools of recovery help us work the Steps and refrain from compulsive overeating. The nine tools are: a plan of eating, sponsorship, meetings, telephone, writing, literature, an action plan, anonymity, and service. For more information, read The Tools of Recovery OA page.
Sponsorship is one of our keys to success. Sponsors are OA members committed to abstinence and to living the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions to the best of their ability. Sponsors share their program up to the level of their experience and strengthen their recovery through this service to others. To find a sponsor, look for someone who has what you want and ask how he or she is achieving it. Will all abstinent sponsors please identify themselves in their post?
According to our Seventh Tradition, we are self-supporting through our own contributions. Our group number is 99038. Please use the group number when making your contribution. As our virtual group currently has no expenses please consider donating directly through this link to the OA World Service Office, who provides resources for OA groups all around the world to carry the message to other compulsive overeaters.
Suggested guidelines for sharing: As you share your experience and strength in OA, please also share your hope. Please confine your sharing to your experience with the disease of compulsive eating, the solution offered by OA, and your own recovery from the disease, rather than just the events of the day or week. When responding to other member’s posts, please focus on your personal experience rather than advice giving. If you are having difficulties, share how you use the program to deal with them. If you need to talk more about your difficulties and seek solutions, we suggest you speak to your sponsor and other members after the meeting.
**This is a literature meeting. Today we are studying the Big Book of Alcohol Anonymous pages 36-37 in the chapter More About Alcoholism.
“ Thus started one more journey to the asylum for Jim. Here was the threat of commitment, the loss of family and position, to say nothing of that intense mental and physical suffering which drinking always caused him. He had much knowledge about himself as an alcoholic. Yet all reasons for not drinking were easily pushed aside in favor of the foolish idea that he could take whiskey if only he mixed it with milk!
Whatever the precise definition of the word may be, we call this plain insanity. How can such a lack of proportion, of the ability to think straight, be called anything else?”
Closing By following the Twelve Steps, attending meetings regularly, and using the OA Tools, we are changing our lives. You will find hope and encouragement in Overeaters Anonymous. To the newcomer, we suggest attending at least six different meetings to learn the many ways OA can help you. The opinions expressed here today are those of individual OA members and do not represent OA as a whole. Let us all reach out by private message to newcomers, returning members, and each other. Together we get better.
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http://rodzice.org/