John is going to get me in trouble he showed up to my work today and surprised me in my room washing a dog I was just about done and ahead so it was a nice surprise he kissed me and could tell I had sucked off multiple dog earlier in the morning but he said it was so hot and whispered he wanted to fuck me and couldn't wait to be inside my bitch pussy I told him I was filthy still full of cum and of course not washed from the night before he just grab my ass and said oh I know baby I love my girl nice and dirty I can smell what a filthy girl you are as he pressed his cock against my ass and just wearing my bikini bottoms I could feel how hard he was for me, I was so turned on by him I couldn't help but get extremely wet and melt in his arms and when he pulled out his cock the smell and steamy muck coming from his dirty cock hit me and I started to drool he just smiled he knows he has me hooked on his smell I turned around and got on my knees so his dirty cock was right in my face so I could rub him against me he grabbed my hair and said that's right baby you dirty girl you love my filthy smegma covered cock don't you I moaned yes before taking him in my mouth he tasted like a dirty horse cock that needed to be cleaned and I was in love I sucked him clean before he bent me over and filled me deep with his thick seed then kissed my neck shaped my ass and said see you this weekend if not sooner and left me dripping with his cum and drooling he's got me in love with him and I'm drooling wanting more 🥰😍

So last night my new boyfriend came over we will call him John and we had a lovely dinner I made and I was so surprised Max my German shepherd was a very good boy bring nice I guess he could tell I liked him. I was wearing a slutty little black dress with a red thong that didn't stay on long, after dinner we sat on the sofa talking and I told him all about my animal loving history and I mean every from when I started to now and he was loving it tell me I was his dream girl he loved that I love being a bitch and having giving my love to dogs and told me never to stop and that he hopes to just join into my relationship with animals as a loving partner and when he said that he kissed me and that turned into hot dirty messy sex he's cock is very large around 10 inches and thick very blessed he's about the same size as max not as thick as Max's knot but still very nice and he loved how loose my body was he's never been with a woman that could take his cock balls deep in there ass, pussy, and mouth with ease and had no problem with him going from my asshole to my mouth or putting my tongue into his asshole as I stroked his cock like I would a horse. It was a nasty delicious night as I was sucking on his cock after cumming inside my ass for the first time Max jumped up and wanted his turn and John spread my ass so Max had a clear shot for my pussy witch he took and that just made John's cock throb even harder in my mouth till he was balls deep down my throat, he loves my no gag reflex and loved how I was a drooling cum filled mess as Max knotted my pussy and filled me with his hot doggy seed John couldn't help himself cumming in my mouth a second big load of delicious cum in my mouth. After that we snuggled the 3 of use for a bit chating and just being close with each other relaxing till the hot smell of John's cock was to much for me to take anymore and I got on my knees like a good bitch and started to lick his balls and cock every delicious inches of him, a big plus got John is that he's a Naturalist like me never using soaps when washing so his nature smell and Manly muck was intoxicating like a animal in heat I couldn't get enough of him he always smelled good but now naked and all hot and sweaty it was to much for me, I was get wet just from his smell and he could 100% tell I loved it asking me if I liked his dirty cock and watching my drooling on him like an animal myself, the second he was starting to get hard I got up and let his throbbing cock slide into my cum filled vagina using Max's cum as lube and I rode hid cock like an animal as he held my little breasts sucking on my hard nipples and I milked another load out of him deep into my vagina and I orgasmed so hard I squirted like a waterfall falling onto his big strong chest. He held me as he's cock relaxed inside me still pretty large even soft and he layed me down only pulling out to lay next to me and kiss me as Max layed between my legs cleaning my vagina and must of passed out because I woke up to my alarm and John made me breakfast so of course before he had to leave for work I sucked him off and got ready for work myself I can't wait to have him over this weekend and hopefully have a couple days to really show him what a good girl I can be for him he said he want to take me out shopping and spoil me I've never had a man want me like him and also he want to let Max meet his dog so hopefully we can have a great 4some one day I know I'm so in love already 😍🥰

Hi all I did this last night and fell asleep before i could post lol. please enjoy
Okay friends time for the final episode of s1! I am finishing my second bowl and decided to add a glass of wine. Lets do this

• Fastest courtship on record = they were banging for months and finally went yay we’re of marriage age
• It is so true not knowing what goes on in a marriage behind closed doors. So many friends seemed to have it all and they were not ok
• Surely while posing for a portrait they would use body doubles until they had to do faces/details
• Granville totally thinks they hate each other until that look
• You know what? I think we should bring these extravagant oil paintings. I want to put on a pretty dress and have some artist make assumptions about my relationship
• Hyacinth asks to join at aubrey hall this summer. Do the youngest kids not go to aubrey hall? Where are they?
• Also anthony mentions his lucky mallet. Id like to see a game of pall-mall in s3
• Fran HAS missed so much, gregory. You dont know the half of it
• Marina looks beautiful in this shade of pink
• Oh here’s sir phillip crane! I’m excited for his and eloises season
• Daphne: the duke is letting his childhood trauma get in the way of what I want
• Daph invites the feathers, violet looks at her like who the fuck raised you to be like this
• Violet is a great facial actor tbh
• So marina knows the other letter was fake, yeah? Do we think she ever confronts lady f?
• Great acting from marina in this scene. “I thought him a villain”
• Madame delacroix’s dress here is quite beautiful
• Sneaky ben in the background like goddamn it eloise thats the last time i’m cool with you
• “Lock the door” yes sir anything you ask
• Daphne finally attempts to get to know the man she interrupted a duel for, he tells her its too fucking late i dont trust you, shes hurt
• I like alice mondrich’s hair in this scene. The fascinator with the twisted coils? is very baroque/romantic/whatever
• Lord f meets his murderers
• Anthony sees sienna. Feral mode: activated
• Phili’s outfit is giving y2k vibes lol. She has almost pigtails and the pink and blue gown looks like a dress my older sister owned that i was jealous of
• Philip crane seems sweet. Marina is a a boundaries queen: i do not know this man, i do not love this man; ergo, i will not fucking marry this man
• Pru: damn this is romantic tho
• Pen gains back a little respect for marina
• Daphne goes hunting for explanations, finds them in spades
• I think even without reading the letters she knew enough to piece it together. I mean, she knows simons dad was never around, mrs colson tells her he was cruel to the former duchess because of her inability to give him an heir, simon has alluded to the fact that he had an unhappy childhood…and shes still like but why doesnt he want kids??
• Sienna and anthony lock eyes, then genitals
• Imagine holding onto those hamsterburns like handlebars while riding that ride
• LD like wow really you digging around in private drawers? Ok well here’s the tea
• Simon expresses shock that mondrich prefers financial security to getting punched in the face regularly
• Lol worry about your own marriage dukey boy
• Looking forward to the mondrichs this new season too
• Portia like aw fuck this is blood money. Hm. blood money can still buy dresses
• I lied last time, we do see simon at bridgerton house 1 more time. This is a cute scene
• Fran’s recast looks quite different but still has the same face somehow? Idk
• B&E are shocked that anthony is cool all of a sudden
• And then the catch and then the catch and then the catch and toast go round
• Colin getting quieter when he sees penelope 😍
• Simon impresses everyone with some origami. Lucky there was a perfect square of paper waiting there. I hope that wasn’t important
• “And mine is yellow’ poor pen. You get your colors soon
• Phili not even realizing she’d lost her dowry lol
• Marina felt the baby kick
• Random side story: margaret cho found out she was pregnant once because she was on acid and felt “someone else is in here” lmao thats so creepy to me
• I wish i had a courtyard
• “As if that ever works” ok condescending dr dick, whats a girl to do? Hop over to ye olde plann-ed parenthood?
• Anthony so smitten with sienna 🙂 i cant wait to see him all cute with kate 🥰
• Daphne and simon are so obviously in love and stupidly stubborn. This is courting season all over again
• Eloise snapping at a dude that aint even looking at her
• Daphne is a good sis here. Go hide in the library, no harm no foul
• The featheringtons are back baby
• Aw colin and pen ❣️
• “One should declare it” i hear her derry girls accent there lol
• Brimsley: one does not simply approach my queen
• Anthony with the bouquet for sienna 😥
• Honestly he’s so lovely in this scene. He seems to really realize that he cant be the one for sienna. He wears heartbreak well lol
• Eloise up to LW shenanigans. Does pen know eloise saved her butt there?
• I just want to pick up duke and daphne and smoosh their faces together like dolls
• “The very last time i danced was with him” - violet youre killing me
• “It is a choice, dear” i love this so much. Love really is choosing each other every day
• I’m actually not really a romance person but i love bridgerton because it has this message of friendship and choosing each other and letting love in even when its scary
• Simon and daphne in the rain, remembering that night they fucked outside
• LD with her cane keeping everyone back lol
• All the guests like but what about all those cakes?
• The servants probably got to pig out tho
• Daphne: your dad made you feel like you werent worthy of love Also daphne: i thought you were enough for me before i really knew you
• Aw phili comes in so in love with finch just to find out daddy’s dead
• Simon: i still love you despite how you treat me but i dont know how to be the different person you desire Daphne: you just do it ok put a baby in me
• Ok as much as i hate this problematic storyline i love this makeup sex scene
• He asks her to start on top to show he trusts her and then he finishes on top to be like see i’m into this too. Its just good showing not telling
• Also daphnes veins are so visible in this scene. As a follow pale, thin-skinned person i feel seen
• Duke cums, LW:a grander finish
• Eloise is a great friend in this scene. “I am here to help you ….endure the absence of your dear papa” thats a beautiful way to express sympathy. No everything happens for a reason, no things will get better, no thoughts and prayers, just: I am here and i will help you live with this horrible loss
• Portia: you find things to love. Like the money they provide and the tacky fashions they afford you
• I like this moment bw lady f and marina. There’s mutual respect even after all the crap
• I imagine colin trying to ride a horse to greece
• Simon: take sometime to enjoy ourselves, do a lot of fucking Anthony: dude thats my sister
• Anthony: i got my heart broken, fuck that shit again. I’m swearing off love Kate, still in india: we’ll see about that
• Simon and daphne are now love experts. Perhaps he will learn, like we did
• Anthony and benedict both bailed on daphne’s ball, and yet poor eloise was still there
• The penelope LW reveal got me so good in the first watch lol
• “I shall need you to push, your grace” i shall need you to run swiftly from this burning building, m’lady
• I’m childfree and not interested at all but i find the image of new dad at new moms side so incredibly romantic/attractive
• If you were to name your kids in alphabetical order, which names would you pick? I would go Agatha/Antony, Beatrice/Bennet, Constance/Connor, Dianthus/Daniel, Evelyn/Elias, Flora/Felix, Genevieve/Graham, Hazel/Holden
• If i made it past 8 i’d be shocked lol

Okay i’ll do season 2 next! Thanks for following along with me while i fill time waiting for polin season

For the love of Tyr I am utterly disgusted by the discourse in this sub. You know what is wrong with Faerun? YOU. Don't get me wrong, I love a good joke or raunchy song by the taven bard but I swear to the gods themselves if I have to hear about casting enlarge on yourself then blowing such a massive load in Sazza that she flies off your massive throbbing cock like a goblin cum rocket I'm smiting your foul ass. Understand, I'm not saying you can only fuck Shart in missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation. Go ahead an bend Alfira in half and ram her harder than a jackhammer going through bedrock but decency has it's limits. If you wanna go and make tadpoles with Froggy at least do it behind closed doors and feel ashamed of yourself. Because of you people, I cannot get the image of Tav licking The Emperor's briney squid toes out of my mind. You think any decent person wants to be sexually terrorized by endless thoughts of "grape training" or the perverse sexual proclivities of those filthy shapeshifting druids? Absolutely not, It's wrong. So let this be a warning to you all, you better not taunt me in the comments with the most vile tales of your depraved escapades in Wyrm's Crossing. If you do anything of the sort I will have no choice but to purify you in the cleansing fire of Tyr's holy wrath.
Let me be your eyes, Blind One, and cast your justice upon this world.
Edit: I take a full rest and what do I see? You people acting like this post is some kind of joke, I'm trying to save your immortal souls for Tyr's sake! I know how hard it can be to resist temptation. Whom among us hasn't fantasized about Halsin turning into horse and penetrating you so thoroughly that he can spin you around his gigantic, engorged member like a rotisserie chicken. If you succumb to those fetid desires the only fire you'll be roasting over are the flames of infernal Avernus. Do not head the call of Mizora's supple bosom for eternal damnation is at stake.

Last time on Party Roll

We follow Krimbim's story arc for a bit to open. We find out that he's alive! And when the shit went down, this slick rick decided to tunnel his way to safety.Making his way out of the desert, Krimbin just happens to come into the settlement of Drybed unbeknownst to the party.What's coo coo crazy is that, after his long journey, he goes looking for an inn to rest his wary feet, only to be thrusted into a battle with our party and some baddies! Talk about luck eh? Let it be known, Krimbin has a thing for sand. Do with that as you will...
We manage to get a hostage out of this battle and we begin to get a clearer picture of what's going on here. Basically, the "cultist" see Alabaster the child, as the rightful king and they are willing to do anything to achieve this goal.During this waterboarding, Otto, are almost useless boy squire, Otto.... decides that he would take a random wand off our hostage and hold it next to her head...Yup, A fireball explodes. LOT'S of damage is taken; Sarn is near deaths bed and our hostage almost makes an escape! but somehow, we dust ourselves off and try to find a place to recoup with one hostage in tow
Party Roll to beat: 4
Matt 5 Cory 3 Jose 12 Dusty NAT 1 Mark Vanessa
Hambone eats all the party Burritos while Jose does a traditional Mexican dance around Matt's throw up.
​
​
​
Back to the Party!
Hokay, so the Inn is looking pretty much like a disaster from all that's been going on. The bartender is totally dead btw. We gotta get outta here. We put the unconscious Sarn on the back of a horse, the same goes for our hostage Wizburr. Oh! we loot the dead bartender to grab some change and a key. We look into the backroom and see a safe...maybe this key goes to that? Hmmm....We check it out and it works! The safe clicks open and we find 100 gold and the deed to the bar.
Krimbin tells us there is an oasis nearby where they can go to rest and interrogate more of this hostage. Leading the way, it's ye 3 hours away, but things are uneventful. We arrive, it's quiet. There are some shotty wooden structures and they head inside. We begin to interrogate our elf wizard and find out some interesting things. The baddies are still looking for the staff (But the unconscious Sarn still has), while we don't know the King's motives, we do find out that the orders are coming from Sir Onn'd who's in the castle within Storms End. These orders are given to them in the guards station outside the castle...and there is a password to get in... "World eater"
Donoub clues in that this is a reference to their insignia and shows her flakey tattoo of the snake symbol (the ouroboros) upon her breast towards Wizburr the hostage.The elfen wizard pauses and asks, "are you one of us?". Donoub plays off this and goes along with the flow, currying enough favor to basically win Wizburr into trusting us. Wow...Waterboarding DOES work.
Wizburr asks to be released from her bonds, but the group isn't just about ready to do such a thing. Krimbin says it's best for her safety that she stay this way...
Sledge, Roll for persuasion 5, fail
Krimbin, Roll for persuasion 11, pass
She just lays there hesitant and lazy

"Well it's because the false king, he allows the walls to stay up and just lets the desert and everyone else in it consume themselves. The true king tho, the true king and his hand will open the wall and will let everyone to freedom." - Wizburr

So we kinda get a better picture of what's going on. The crown has the ability to control the people, while the staff along with the crown opens up the storm wall. Hmmm well....which King is the right King now?! Hmmm well on that note, we finally get some rest within this shack at the Oasis.
We wake up, spell slots regained, but Sarn is still knocked out. Unwilling to take Wizburr with us, we place her in a hut, where she will be protected from the wilderness.Welp, it's early morning and we have to trek back the 3 hours towards the settlement town, free of our hostage and onwards with the story!
We devise a plan where we'll head back to Drybed, go through the poop tunnel (what is with our Party and Poop tunnels?!) and if we catch any trouble, bribe our way in.Donoub will cast, 'mask of many faces' to mimic Wizburr, while donning her clothes which had to be tailored to Donoubs body to be passable.
As we get closer to our destination, we can actually smell it. The place looks like an old western town.
It's kinda what you'd expect a shit pipe to look like. The waste and fecal matter of the town is plopping out of this pipe, at a pretty consistent rate. Garbage floats to the top of this bog water. To the side of the pipe is the city wall, where people with carts come and go. We walk on over to the gated wall and are stopped by a guard. Upon seeing Donoub's robe, which is a complete replica of Wizburr's, we are given a glance and a nod to carry on.We are now in the Slums of Storm's eye!
Now just to recap...
We were sent out by the King to find a scouting party that went MIA. En route to checking them out, we were also tasked to find parts to repair the King's royal sandcrawler, which has surely broken down and come to a standstill now. We however got ambushed, lost our horses, got side tracked a bit and find ourselves back in the city. Which isn't too bad, seeing as the parts we need are actually somewhere in this forsaken place.
​
Krimbin tells us of the royal repair station, a place that will surely have what parts he needs. There, they can get a cart, load it up and head on out. As we arrive we notice that the shop is right next to the guard station. Krimbim notices a few fellers from his crew, who begin to look busy, seeing as their boss is now back. Ushering one of his grease monkey's into his presence, Krimbim tells his worker that he needs these parts for the King's sandcrawler; keeping things as vague as possible. The worker is a tad confused...because the King is here in the city....EEEEeeeee! Krimbim, quick on his toes, informs his curious worker that this is a separate thing, for the king, where he'll have two crawlers.
The workers are a little wary, esp cause Krimbim came outta nowhere, with a bunch of randoms, with an even more random project. The workers band together and ask to have a word with Krimbim. Donoub heads into the shadows and eavesdrops/readies for any action if needed....
Krimbim, Roll persuasion to convince his workers to do what he says and get the parts 8, Fail The worker doesn't bend and heads off to find someone with authority to confirm this work requisition.
​
The party is feeling the heat here. They wanna just grab the parts and book it, but it seems the remaining workers aren't going to help them. Looks like they have been taken care of in Krimbim's absence and don't wanna fuck that up. Krimbim doesn't know how to give up.
Krimbim, Roll persuasion to convince his workers to fill his cart with the parts 12, Pass Some workers start filling the cart, but not all.
​
The process is taking longer than expected. Steven rolls a d20 to see what the result of this waiting...but he rolls poorly, so nothing happens. However, just as they are about to depart, we hear one of the workers bringing Sir Onn'd over to confirm the work order. Donoub enters into the washroom undetected and disguises herself as Wizburr the female elf. Sledge manages to find a good hiding spot with a 18, Otto with a 4, not so well. Kinda just around the corner. Into frame, comes the jet black oiled hair, fine mustache wearing Sir Onn'd. Looking dapper as per usual. He looks around and just sees Donoub, who has disguised herself. Sir Onn'd approaches her, as he's never seen her before. A tense banter of words between Sir Onn'd and the disguised Donoub passes smoothly when he remembers her name. Turning his attention to Krimbim, he questions the work order here and how this order doesn't make sense. Kimbrim does a lot of bullshitting here and kinda gets lucky. He passes off any inconsistenices with the fact that everything he is doing is for the rightful King Alabaster. Further more, Krimbim doubles down and lies, telling Sir Onn'd that the old King is dead and they are out there looking for his body. The workers back Krimbim with a cheer and the good feels put Krimbim in a position of a promotion. Sir Onn'd depart and the entire party slowly let out a nervous flat fart.
Free to leave, we head towards the main gate, covering up their cart with tarp to avoid prying eyes, towards the dunes.
​
​
​
​
​
Quotes
"I've seen a few out west...it's insane, like the apocalypse is coming or something" - Dusty's Haboob experiences
"He's gunna show you his haboobs" - Dusty
"Someone taped over my tape...ugh...with um...I dunno...'Sand eye for the straight sand'...I dunno..." - Another Failed Matt joke
"...The question is...when you close the door, what remains?" - Steven's deep thoughts on NPC's
"UGGGGGHHH!!!" -Dusty, when Steven says "You come upon..."
"Of course I cum fast, I got fishing to do!" - Dusty
​
​
Trivia
-Dusty rolled a 20 on the last party roll. For this episode, he rolled a Nat 1. I'm calling it a 'Michigan Cheesesteak'
-There is a joke at timestamp 5:57 said by Dusty, but I can't make it out. Does anyone know what he says? The guys really crack up over it. "Matt style" I think.
-Krimbin's horses name is "Sandy"
-Master Qui Gon, what's an Haboob? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haboob
-Sir Onn'd claims to be from beyond the desert storm walls.
-Rory and Matt played with an idea of opening a bar called "Bottom's up"
- Matt wants you to check out this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sewC255u304
​
​
​
​
partyrollpodcast.com
@ party_roll on twitter
https://www.patreon.com/partyrollpodcast
Teener Time https://www.youtube.com/@TeenerTime
www.youtube.com/@PartyRollPodcast

FRIDAY

• First Friday, Downtown, Raleigh
• Get The Led Out, DPAC, Durham
• PLAYlist Concert Series: John Brown & the Groove Shop Band, Durham Central Park, Durham
• Brett Chambers’ Open Mic: Cary Edition, The Cary Theater, Cary
• BANDS, BITES, AND BOATS AT BOND PARK, Bond Park Boathouse, Cary
• Pink Floyd Laser Spectacular, The Carolina Theatre, Durham
• “Star Wars: Return of the Jedi” In Concert with the North Carolina Symphony, North Carolina Symphony, Raleigh
• Concerts & Cocktails: “Star Wars: Return of the Jedi” in Concert, 10th & Terrace at Residence Inn Raleigh Downtown, Raleigh
• B. Simone, Goodnights Comedy Club, Raleigh
• The Plastic Cup Boyz, Raleigh Improv, Raleigh
• Mary Santora, Room 861 at Goodnights Comedy Club, Raleigh
• First Friday Market and Movie Night at Halifax Mall, Halifax Mall, Raleigh
• Umrao Jaan Ada, Martin Marietta Center for the Performing Arts, Raleigh
• Brett's Open Mic - Cary Edition, The Cary Theater, Cary
• Accent Imaging 165, Wake County Speedway, Raleigh
• 2024 Down Home Concerts: Red Clay Ramblers 50th Anniversary, A.J. Fletcher Opera Theater at Martin Marietta Center for the Performing Arts, Raleigh
• HerbFest, Festival Park, Wake Forest
• Carolina Mudcats vs. Columbia Fireflies, Five County Stadium, Zebulon
• The Night Rider Presents: Bob Funck & The Cardboard Diamonds w/Brother Kent, The Night Rider, Raleigh
• The Breakfast Club - 80’s Party Band, Lincoln Theatre, Raleigh
• Spring Concert Series: Let Your Spirit Soar, Wake Forest Baptist Church, Wake Forest
• Say Anything - Is A Real Boy 20th Anniversary Tour, The Ritz, Raleigh
• Runaway Cab, The Pour House Music Hall & Record Shop, Raleigh
• NC Master Chorale: Sunrise Mass, Holy Name of Jesus Cathedral, Raleigh
• Know Your Artist Event, Whiskey Kitchen, Raleigh
• CAM First Friday, CAM Raleigh, Raleigh
• First Friday: Mental Health Awareness Event, City of Raleigh Museum (COR Museum), Raleigh
• Sayer McShane, The Blue Note Grill, Durham
• First Fridays Latin Night with DJ Synko, The Velvet Hippo Bar & Lounge, Durham
• Hip Hop Night with Lexiconzzz and special guests Tweekeen and Big Mooky, The Glass Jug Beer Lab, Durham
• The Racket Comedy, Mettlesome Theatre, Durham
• Alexa Vélez & Daniel Levin + David Menestre, Shadowbox Studio, Durham
• Uri Gurvich/Rodolfo Zuniga Quartet, Sharp Nine Gallery, Durham
• Comedy Night at Mystic Distillery, Mystic Farm and Distillery, Durham
• Rebecca Kleinmann Quintet, Missy Lane's Assembly Room, Durham
• CIAA Outdoor Track and Field Championships, Durham County Memorial Stadium, Durham
• 4-Day Pop Up at Horse & Buggy Press and Friends, Horse & Buggy Press and Friends, Durham
• Vietri's Spring Warehouse Sale, Vietri Outlet, Hillsborough
• Freight Train Blues Concert Series, Carrboro Town Commons, Carrboro
• THE VERVE PIPE, The Rialto, Raleigh

​
SATURDAY

• 43rd Annual Apex PeakFest, Historic Downtown, Apex
• Meet in the Street, Downtown, Wake Forest
• May the Fourth Be with You, Downtown Cary Park, Cary
• May the 4th Be with You!, John Chavis Memorial Park and Community Center, Raleigh
• Umrao Jaan Ada, Martin Marietta Center for the Performing Arts, Raleigh
• Bike Rodeo, Marbles Kids Museum, Raleigh
• Cary Dog Daze and Pet Expo, Cary Town Hall, Cary
• 19th Annual Strawberry Festival, Old North Durham Park, Durham
• NCFC vs. Rhode Island FC, WakeMed Soccer Park, Cary
• 2nd Annual Ma & Pa Festival, Between Hargett and Davie streets, Raleigh
• Alice and Wonderland and Balanchine's Who Cares?, A.J. Fletcher Opera Theater at Martin Marietta Center for the Performing Arts, Raleigh
• Cocktails & Cuisine Class: For the Agave Lovers, The Willard Rooftop Lounge, Raleigh
• “Star Wars: Return of the Jedi” In Concert with the North Carolina Symphony, North Carolina Symphony, Raleigh
• Concerts & Cocktails: “Star Wars: Return of the Jedi” in Concert, 10th & Terrace at Residence Inn Raleigh Downtown, Raleigh
• Symposium 2024: Military Units from North Carolina, North Carolina State Archives, Raleigh
• B. Simone, Goodnights Comedy Club, Raleigh
• Mary Santora, Room 861 at Goodnights Comedy Club, Raleigh
• The Plastic Cup Boyz, Raleigh Improv, Raleigh
• Lula and Sadie's Derby Day Party, Lula and Sadie's- a Fine Southern Eatery, Durham
• Cinco de Mayo Bar Crawl, Downtown, Durham
• Pops in the Park, Piney Wood Park, Durham
• Get Your Rear in Gear 5K, WakeMed Soccer Park, Cary
• 2024 AIDS Walk & 5K Run, William Peace University, Main Building, Raleigh
• Chatham Rabbits in the Sanctuary, The Ridge, Raleigh
• Raleigh Tacos & Margs Crawl®, The Avenue, Raleigh
• NCMA: Teens Sketch the Galleries, North Carolina Museum of Art, Raleigh
• Priscilla Block, The Ritz, Raleigh
• Derby in the Den, Below Beasley's, Raleigh
• Houseplants 101: a Class and Repotting Experience, JC Raulston Arboretum at North Carolina State University, Raleigh
• Maiden Voyage: Iron Maiden Tribute, The Pour House Music Hall & Record Shop, Raleigh
• Royel Otis, Lincoln Theatre, Raleigh
• The Night Rider Presents: Goddamn Wolves, Ellimist & The Hollow Truths, The Night Rider, Raleigh
• Theatre Raleigh In Concert: Eric Sorrels, Theatre Raleigh, Raleigh
• YMCA Families On! Challenge, A.E. Finley YMCA, Raleigh
• The Really Terrible Orchestra of the Triangle (RTOOT) presents: Refresh And Renew, Cary Arts Center, Cary
• Movies Under the Stars, Carolina Square, Chapel Hill
• Vietri's Spring Warehouse Sale, Vietri Outlet, Hillsborough
• Strawberry Jamboree at the Carrboro Farmers’ Market, Carrboro Farmers' Market, Carrboro
• Spring Native Plant Sale, North Carolina Botanical Garden, Chapel Hill
• Murder Mystery Night with Goats, Spring Haven Farm, Chapel Hill
• Derby Day Auction Gala benefiting the Burwell School, Whitted Building, Hillsborough
• Dawn Landes & Friends Perform THE LIBERATED WOMAN’S SONGBOOK, PlayMakers Repertory Company, Chapel Hill
• Colossal Human Failure, Local 506, Chapel Hill
• Chris Knight, Cat's Cradle, Carrboro
• 4-Day Pop Up at Horse & Buggy Press and Friends, Horse & Buggy Press and Friends, Durham
• CIAA Outdoor Track and Field Championships, Durham County Memorial Stadium, Durham
• Wild Kratts, DPAC, Durham
• Kierfer Nursery 40th Anniversary Festival, Kiefer Nursery, Durham
• Pollinator Garden Volunteer Day, The Glass Jug Beer Lab, Durham
• Bird Bonanza, Museum of Life and Science, Durham
• Saturdaze — DJ k.ward, Boxyard RTP, Durham
• History Grove Dedication Commemorating Dr. Thomas Krakauer, Museum of Life and Science, Durham
• Durham Garden Tour, Various locations, Durham
• May the 4th Party, Boxcar Arcade, Durham
• Cinco De Mayo Party, Glass Jug Downtown, Durham
• Mystic Farm & Distillery Derby Party, Mystic Farm & Distillery, Durham
• DanceGruv Radio presents WAV 002, 21C Museum Hotel, Durham
• BeMyFiasco: Live, Missy Lanes, Durham
• ADF Showings at Scripps: West Virginia Dance Company, ADF's Samuel H. Scripps Studios, Durham
• The Howard Levy 4, The Blue Note Grill, Durham
• Kevin Beardsley Quartet, Sharp Nine Gallery, Durham
• The DJam--Swinging Gypsy Jazz & More, Succotash Southern & Creole Kitchen, Durham
• Punk & Drag, The Pinhook, Durham
• Gay Agenda Presents: Galactical Boogie, Rubies on Five Points, Durham

​
SUNDAY

• NCMA Music of Remembrance: Holocaust Remembrance Day (Yom HaShoah) Concert, North Carolina Museum of Art, Raleigh
• Dr. Jordan B Peterson, DPAC, Durham Performing Arts Center, Durham
• Kathy Griffin: My Life on the PTSD-List, Carolina Theatre, Durham
• Cinco de Mayo, Moore Square, Raleigh
• North Caroliina Indian & South East Asian Film Festival, The Cary Theater, Cary
• Third Annual Nasher Community Celebration, Nasher Museum of Art at Duke University, Durham
• Cinco De Mayo, Bottles & Cans, Morrisville
• Cinco De Mayo, Whiskey Kitchen, Raleigh
• Cinco de Mayo Margaritas on the Rooftop, 10th & Terrace at Residence Inn Raleigh Downtown, Raleigh
• LYLVC, The Pour House Music Hall & Record Shop, Raleigh
• Author Event: Lee Clark, Page 158 Books, Wake Forest
• Solemon Shapes, Mevius & Orangepeelmystic LIVE, Ruby Deluxe, Raleigh
• Carolina Mudcats vs. Columbia Fireflies, Five County Stadium, Zebulon
• The Plastic Cup Boyz, Raleigh Improv, Cary
• Unicorn World, Raleigh Convention Center, Raleigh
• Spicy Sunday: Cinco de Mayo Latin Day Party!, The Velvet Hippo Bar & Lounge, Durham
• Cinco De Mayo, Boxcar Arcade, Durham
• Duke Baseball vs Longwood, Jack Coombs Field, Durham
• Cinco De Mayo Party, Glass Jug Downtown, Durham
• United in Song: Music of the American Experience, Baldwin Auditorium, Duke's East Campus, Durham
• Friends of Page-Walker Herbfest, Page-Walker Arts & History Center, Cary
• Grace Cummings, Cat's Cradle, Carrboro
• Carrboro Day Celebration, Carrboro Town Hall, Carrboro
• The Plastic Cup Boyz, Raleigh Improv, Raleigh

​
Join the Thingstodo919 email list here for a weekly events newsletter. Doing anything interesting this weekend? Let us know your plans in the comments

i’m thinking about her but my mind is on you, mixing the thoughts with the insights got to late night, too lose to love, no hold on, there’s vains in your eye, kissing the thoughts welcome, bienvenue, with your body about to bless the venue, can’t stop my thoughts so i do, so meré, got a good one covering this, all day, sexy as sex, come lemme taste taste, like two blade-blade, your my sliver hawk, can’t give a horse forced water love, tell me how to move, tell me how to push, tell me how to prove, all this stuff ain’t new, niggas talking much, not loving much, track a bitch up, but not how to love, teach a bitch suck but not how to stuff a love, give her good cum or not ever cum, to home to call this quits, the last notes where for the niggas who ain’t into this, body, soul, much more, guys glow, she grows, never bending the guy tho,
being girl, 🧪🧪🧪 Ebony Carmel wonder even Peter Pan couldn’t fap yuh Santa’s crush, even the boogie man can’t cop yuh even the elves become rich, just to get yuh right, get your papers, get your planet even the world gonna fucking wonder how the fuck this triple bum big big got so bunda, my eu thing so good even my mother wonders, virgins in heavenly rings want to stop not starring, stars in palms, heads got not even a fallen one, not one God didn’t not cry the V card called that one, stop her turn, get in her turn, fell in love for a girl that a guy here can’t not even cum.
love 💕
come to me love, come to me come to the city where the bad guys be trip of the moons glow and wonder in peace, fall in love with a bad guy in peace, baby; where do i even comment, comment ça va ? lemme but you on baecation mixed with relaxation baby with your body’s realization on, can’t even fantom baby my life’s to gone to the longer, and if my lives still one baby then lemme fantom on, weed and ca$h, smells like a niggas mind, weed on my eyes and cash on my hair, hail my God, my God hailed on my city’s streams, and all I do rn, tonight baby girl is just to hate more on me for the night is young and the days are longer the times are shorter but the life ting got sweeter, come just sit and envy me, could i should just to pull up all neat, love you all, young or growing like the whole world came outta me, see how me live my baby’s dreams one kind of baby sea, shoes, outfits and. All night eyes on my clean jeans, which one tho because this is just my evening as she undressed to show me the dawn later. bottles to cure the sadness the city offers. so she too lives, can i love you more than my whole life time of previous memory, may your evening be greater my love. to both. my sunburns so you grind this life
💋💋💋💋

That's nice that they can enjoy beastiality as a couple. I would give anything to have a woman who loves beastiality and we could both get fucked by a horse I'll eatout her cumfilled pussy then she can guide the horses cock deep into my ass jackingoff the horse till it shoots a huge load of cum into my ass. Then we both take turns sucking the horses cock and drinking all of it's delicious cum 😋 😜

Because of semi literate numb nuts like you folks, he's been trolled mercilessly. He's been called names for shits and giggles. Today, I'll present you a case of his extreme genuisity that would crack your nuts minds open!
You literature impaired jerks might have known this fyamous song "Saamajavaragamana" from AVPL. Incels like you think that it's a song on Pooja Hegde's legs. As it's said beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder, and as a person who finds Pooja Hegde extremely beautiful (no I'm not 3V anon account) and attractive (if you say no, you're just lying to your ugly existences), the song has multiple layers and today I'm going to cum shower on you the beauty of this song!!!
Let's see the opening lines
"Nee kaallani pattuku vadalanannavi choode na kallu....A choopulanalla thokkuku vellaku dayaledha asalu"
You misogynist incels might think it's directed towards Pooja Hegde's thighs but it's actually a pativrata akkaww calling out her hubby!!! Surprise MoFos😎 read it again, this time slowly.
The next: "Nee kallaki kaavali kasthaye katukala na kalalu...Nuvvu nulumuthunte yerraga kandhi chindhene segalu"
This might seem like a boy simping to a garal but my deeper analysis taught me something else, completely. Here's where 3V brings in his Puranic knowledge.
It's actually Rukmini talking/pleading to Krishna!!! You didn't and couldn't even imagine this in your wildest wet dreams right? The entire song from here on is Rukmini talking to Krishna.
"Na oopiri gaaliki uyyalalooguthu unte mungurulu....Nuvvu nettesthe ala nittoorchavatte nishtoorapu vilavlalu"
These two lines and above two lines are directly referring to Rukmini waiting for Krishna to come and take her from her forced marriage.
Read it again you literature impaired nincompoops and you'll get it!!
Telugu Sahitya abhimanulu, ready to get your brains blown by me in the coming lines!!!
"Saamajavaragamana", it literally means the one who walks like a Royal Elephant. Thyagaraja used this to describe Krishna!!! This isn't the surprise, hold your >! horses!< like Olympic Jyothi,
Now if we do the Samaasa vibhagam a bit differently,
Saamaja - offspring of Saama(Vedam) Music!!
The one that walks like Music or the one who walks Music!! Rukmini is calling Krishna as the embodiment of music. Krishna mesmerizes everyone with his flute music.
You got a mental orgasm right?
"Ninu choosi aaga galana Manasu meeda vayasukunna adupu cheppataguna"
These lines simply describe how Rukmini is waiting desperately for Krishna as her marriage is approaching!!
"Mallela masama.. Manjula hasama??"
Here Rukmini is questioning Krishna this ain't no sweet times to laugh like that.
You never even imagined in these lines right? Unprofessional audiences!!
"Prathi malupulopna yedurupadina vennela vanama"
She's yearning for him and asking him you're there for me throughout.... so why are you not coming to take me away!!!
"Virisina pinchama" This word is directly referring to his Nemali Pincham and yet you morons couldn't get it!!
"Virula prapanchama Ennenni vannesinnelante ennaga vasama"
She's referring to his flirting skills in Brindavanam you uneducated brutes!! She's asking him you're a master of flirting but enough is enough, I'm your true love!!
"Arey naa gaale thagilina.Naa neede tharimina Vulakava, palakava bhama"
Now she's getting desperate and asking him even though we're physically separate, I'm like a wind that touches you always and the shadow that follows you always.
It's interesting to note that Rukmini is taunting Krishna that why are you behaving like a girl and not listening to my pleading. The bhama here is Mohini, an Avataram of Vishnu!!! Perfect right?
"Entho brathimalina Inthena angana Madini meete madhuramaina manvini vinuma"
Come on dumb fucks, these lines are self explanatory!!
"Saamajavaragamana"....
Adi 3V samskaaram!!!
Considering this song was penned by the legend Sirivennela, I'm sure all of you noobs have missed the deeper layers and stuck on Pooja Hegde's legs. Sed Lyf 💀
3V just did a Circlejerking here and let it sung by a male singer. This entire fore word play is gender neutral and it perfectly fits even if a garal sings for her boy! He just wants us to use our brains rather than eyes getting stuck on the lead actress' legs!!!

Yesterday, thirty Romans, allies, and friends gathered in Roma to participate in and observe the ceremonies and games held to celebrate 11 years of civ.
The best picture to turn out of yesterday
The date we first settled on civ, the first date "SPQR" was some form of entity, the date we might have formally established ourselves, and the date we gained independence from the Kingdom of Gondolin - are all different and all lost to history, the earliest being December 2012, and the latest being May 2013. Some of that early 1.0 and pre-history is recorded in an incomplete wiki article here for anyone interested, (and a longer draft exists elsewhere). But its safe to say the S.P.Q.R. was firmly established as a thing on civ by spring 2013 - and so we arbitrarily picked a Saturday in April to be that date - which also happened to line up nicely with the date traditionally attributed as the historical founding of Rome. And since our establishment in civcraft 1.0, we've continued on in one form or another on 2.0, 3.0, civclassics, civrealms, and now civMC.... and while very few of the oldfriends remain, its been great meeting many new friends and to share these experiences with them and begin to hand things off to newer blood.
We considered yesterday a great success and want to thank everyone who showed up and participated in or helped organize the events of yesterday, but a special thank you goes to:
BattleOfSky, the Aedile for Spring events, who organized and planned the event and did the lions share of preparation to make it happen.
Derschaften_, the Quaestor of the brewing guild and owner of The Tilted Spear tavern, who supplied over 400 brews for the event.
ExioElNuv, the dedicated citizen who has continued to work on the Colosseum over the last 5 months to bring it to where it is today, and whose honor the monumental structure has been formally named - (Amphitheatrum Exio)
TophatAlex, for surprising us with a 16 minute cut of highlights taken from the over three-hour event
And also a thank you to DarthChini, my friend and co-Consul who provided the prize money from his business LLC and helped Sky with preparation - and to Zinc and Deathpath, who used the event to unveil their new business: the Epona Island Auction company, An auction house and horse breeding program.
Overall, we probably enjoyed somewhere between fifty and a hundred deaths in the arena (maybe more - no official count), consumed at least 174 brews, raised 1,987 diamonds in auctions for 13 items, conducted sacrifices in two temples, and held 5 events in the Colosseum.
Some of the highlights:

• DarthChini and Beeboo welcome the first visitors
  
• Sacrifices in the Temple of Mars - (Not a museum)
  
• A protester attempts to defile the statue of Jupiter - (Zinc was later absolved of any wrongdoing)
  
• Sacrifices in the Temple of Jupiter - the latest Temple completed in Roma, finished by sky last month.
  
• peasant mob prematurely breaks into the brew hut before proceeding to the auction house
  
• The auctions at the Epona Island Auction House - Both a grand opening for the business - and - a shameful plug from the 'Kayne for Tribune campaign'
  
• The Epona Island Auction House exterior - one of the newer builds in the city.
  
• Evening at the Colosseum Amphitheatrum Exio
  
• The auctioned cow arrives at the Colosseum to be seated among honored guests
  
• Participants in the Leather Free-For-All event
  
• The largest prizes were handed out during the Iron Elimination Tournament - and - violence in the rain made a better picture
  
• Evening in the Colosseum
  
• Neither Gamer, Exio, Kayne, or tophatAlex were able to overcome Sky in the Hunting pack event - (no wolves were harmed during this event)
  
• Morning at the Colosseum
  
• The main event everyone was looking forward to: The Flooded Colosseum
  
• All of the boats - (Most of these boats are now in Vinland thanks to broadpancake)
  
• The Singles Boat Battle began in the evening, another one here.
  
• But the daytime doubles boats made for better pictures: one, two, and three
  
• Noble guests preside over the closing ceremony
  
• Guests gather for one last picture
  

These and the rest of the album here.
Gods willing, the next major set of games we'll be planning will be the Roman Games to be held sometime in mid-early September to coincide with the Ludi Romani.... but we're always looking for excuses to host and assist in events of any type, so maybe something will pop up sooner...

Yesterday, thirty Romans, allies, and friends gathered in Roma to participate in and observe the ceremonies and games held to celebrate 11 years of civ.
The best picture to turn out of yesterday
The date we first settled on civ, the first date "SPQR" was some form of entity, the date we might have formally established ourselves, and the date we gained independence from the Kingdom of Gondolin - are all different and all lost to history, the earliest being December 2012, and the latest being May 2013. Some of that early 1.0 and pre-history is recorded in an incomplete wiki article here for anyone interested, (and a longer draft exists elsewhere). But its safe to say the S.P.Q.R. was firmly established as a thing on civ by spring 2013 - and so we arbitrarily picked a Saturday in April to be that date - which also happened to line up nicely with the date traditionally attributed as the historical founding of Rome. And since our establishment in civcraft 1.0, we've continued on in one form or another on 2.0, 3.0, civclassics, civrealms, and now civMC.... and while very few of the oldfriends remain, its been great meeting many new friends and to share these experiences with them and begin to hand things off to newer blood.
We considered yesterday a great success and want to thank everyone who showed up and participated in or helped organize the events of yesterday, but a special thank you goes to:
BattleOfSky, the Aedile for Spring events, who organized and planned the event and did the lions share of preparation to make it happen.
Derschaften_, the Quaestor of the brewing guild and owner of The Tilted Spear tavern, who supplied over 400 brews for the event.
ExioElNuv, the dedicated citizen who has continued to work on the Colosseum over the last 5 months to bring it to where it is today, and whose honor the monumental structure has been formally named - (Amphitheatrum Exio)
TophatAlex, for surprising us with a 16 minute cut of highlights taken from the over three-hour event
And also a thank you to DarthChini, my friend and co-Consul who provided the prize money from his business LLC and helped Sky with preparation - and to Zinc and Deathpath, who used the event to unveil their new business: the Epona Island Auction company, An auction house and horse breeding program.
Overall, we probably enjoyed somewhere between fifty and a hundred deaths in the arena (maybe more - no official count), consumed at least 174 brews, raised 1,987 diamonds in auctions for 13 items, conducted sacrifices in two temples, and held 5 events in the Colosseum.
Some of the highlights:

• DarthChini and Beeboo welcome the first visitors
  
• Sacrifices in the Temple of Mars - (Not a museum)
  
• A protester attempts to defile the statue of Jupiter - (Zinc was later absolved of any wrongdoing)
  
• Sacrifices in the Temple of Jupiter - the latest Temple completed in Roma, finished by sky last month.
  
• peasant mob prematurely breaks into the brew hut before proceeding to the auction house
  
• The auctions at the Epona Island Auction House - Both a grand opening for the business - and - a shameful plug from the 'Kayne for Tribune campaign'
  
• The Epona Island Auction House exterior - one of the newer builds in the city.
  
• Evening at the Colosseum Amphitheatrum Exio
  
• The auctioned cow arrives at the Colosseum to be seated among honored guests
  
• Participants in the Leather Free-For-All event
  
• The largest prizes were handed out during the Iron Elimination Tournament - and - violence in the rain made a better picture
  
• Evening in the Colosseum
  
• Neither Gamer, Exio, Kayne, or tophatAlex were able to overcome Sky in the Hunting pack event - (no wolves were harmed during this event)
  
• Morning at the Colosseum
  
• The main event everyone was looking forward to: The Flooded Colosseum
  
• All of the boats - (Most of these boats are now in Vinland thanks to broadpancake)
  
• The Singles Boat Battle began in the evening, another one here.
  
• But the daytime doubles boats made for better pictures: one, two, and three
  
• Noble guests preside over the closing ceremony
  
• Guests gather for one last picture
  

These and the rest of the album here.
Gods willing, the next major set of games we'll be planning will be the Roman Games to be held sometime in mid-early September to coincide with the Ludi Romani.... but we're always looking for excuses to host and assist in events of any type, so maybe something will pop up sooner...

What was life like in the decades before this point? Did the average person have much to fear from the VOC/Dutch, or were their actions more directed toward political entities?

- this question once asked on AskHistorians got a very long and detailed answer by a user, whose account sadly doesnt exist anymore. So in a way, we are paying tribute to their brilliant response! Since the answer consists of several, very detailed and elaborate comments, this post will be split in two parts!
Now lets start enjoying the answer:
The VOC had no activities and no impact anywhere at all at the end of the 15th or even 16th centuries, mainly because it didn't exist until 1602. But I get the gist of your question, so here goes: the turbulent relationship between the VOC and Gowa/Makassar, the empire ruling all South Sulawesi, up to 1656, and its effect on everyday life. The VOC had no relations with any other S. Sulawesi state until 1660, so I will discuss only Gowa.
Oh, and a nice Dutch poem to start us off:

Gentlemen, there follows now something of the malevolent Makassar,
In the island of Sulawesi; in the entire East Indies there was
No more villainous race than this, rascally, perjured, malign,
murderous, malignant, savage, perfidious.
[...]
In short, they were scoundrels
spawned by Lucifer, the most desperate ruffians...

But war and hatred were not the only facets of the VOC-Gowa relationship.

South Sulawesi and the Arrival of the Dutch

In 1607, the representatives of the five-year-old Dutch East India Company (VOC) received an invitation from the king of Gowa, the dominant state of South Sulawesi, to trade in his country. Little did either sides understand the transformative century of immense change that both Europe and South Sulawesi had just undergone.
In the first decade of the 16th century the peninsula of South Sulawesi was fragmented into a number of small complex chiefdoms, of which the most prominent included Gowa, Bone, Wajoq, and Luwuq.1 This geopolitical situation would begin to shift in the early 16th century, when Gowa emerged as the peninsula's first state. It began with Tumapaqrisiq Kallonna (r. c. 1511-1546) of Gowa, who subjugated his immediate neighbors, created the first bureaucratic posts, and generally set the stage for expansion across the entire peninsula. This rapid expansion was accomplished by his son Tunipalangga (r. c. 1545-1565), who conquered the entire peninsula save Gowa's archrival Bone, vastly expanded the bureaucracy, and - perhaps most importantly - oversaw the establishment of the first permanent Malay community in Gowa's port capital of Makassar.2
With the establishment of the Malays3 - by far the most important merchant diaspora in 16th-century Southeast Asia - in Makassar, trade expanded greatly. Tunipalangga had conquered the main competitors of Makassar in his great conquests and allowed Makassar to emerge as the natural entrepot for produces from across eastern Indonesia, especially the fine spices from Maluku. Gowa's expanding empire itself provided a source of commercial wealth, for instance by selling tribute from its newly acquired vassals.4
By 1600, after a brief interlude in the early 1690s when a tyrant discouraged trade, Makassar had emerged as the preeminent commercial center of all of eastern Indonesia. Just one year after the VOC was founded, the Dutch reported that their Portuguese enemies were annually sailing from Melaka, their base of power in Southeast Asia, to Makassar to load their ships with spices. In 1605 Malay merchants may have suggested the tumabicara-butta (chancelloprime minister) of Gowa to convert to Islam, who was soon followed by the young king himself. But Muslim or not, Gowa-Talloq5 (see note 5 for why I'm calling it Gowa-Talloq now) committed itself to a general policy of free trade, at least in the port of Makassar itself.
The Dutch, of course, wanted to join the game. After an invitation from the king of Gowa the Dutch arrived, hoping to convince Gowa-Talloq to surrender its support for Portuguese Melaka... and were very disappointed to learn that the king believed that

My country stands open to all nations, and what I have is for you people [the Dutch] as well as for the Portuguese.

The VOC sought to establish monopolies on key Southeast Asian produces, especially the fine spices of clove, nutmeg, and mace. They could then control prices and raise artificial profits. The continual of Makassar's trade of spices made such a monopoly impossible. Furthermore, Makassar was providing safe haven for enemies and competitors of the Dutch, such as the English (who established a factory in 1613) and the Spaniards (whose agent first arrived in 1615). Already, by 1614, a Dutch commissioner was recommending that the Company attack Makassar shipping in Maluku, the Spice Islands.
In 1615 the Dutch informed Gowa-Talloq that there was now a Dutch monopoly in Maluku and that Makassar ships should refrain from heading there. The king of Gowa's response was simple:

God made the land and the sea; the land he divided among men and the sea he gave in common. It has never been heard that anyone should be forbidden to sail the seas. If you seek to do that, you will take the bread from the mouths of the people. I am a poor King.6

As for daily life, not much would have changed - just a new group of merchants on the scene, just like the Malays had arrived in the late 1400s and the Portuguese in the early 1500s. The Dutch had not yet established a definitive monopoly on any of the fine spices and hadn't even acquired Batavia.

The First War

War began a few months later, when the VOC factor Abraham Sterck got frustrated about the king of Gowa not paying some debts. Claiming the government in Makassar had failed to protect him from the insults of the Spaniards (with whom the Dutch were still at war), Sterck left abruptly with a number of Gowa-Talloq nobles. The nobles resisted and seven were killed, including a nephew of Gowa's king. The harbormaster of Makassar and another royal relative was taken as prisoner of the Dutch. This incident infuriated Gowa-Talloq and almost resulted in the ousting of the English as well, since the English factor had for some reason left with the Dutch. The English managed to stay, but the Dutch did not.
And... I hate to end on a cliffhanger, but I'm not even half done, but I've hit 9988 characters and it's 22:52 here. I'll finish tomorrow, promise.
1 Map of the current regencies of South Sulawesi, many of which retain the old kingdoms' borders. Note that these are in Indonesian; Luwu here is Luwuq, Wajo is Wajoq, etc.
There is an emerging consensus that there were no genuine states in South Sulawesi in 1500, insofar as it matters to distinguish an archaic state from a complex chiefdom. This is best presented in Tale of Two Kingdoms: The Historical Archaeology of Gowa and Tallok, archaeologist David Bulbeck's thesis, which most archaeologists cite. But on chiefdom vs state in South Sulawesi, also see The Lands West of the Lakes: A History of the Ajattappareng Kingdoms of South Sulawesi, 1200 to 1600 CE by Stephen C. Druce and Land of Iron: The historical archaeology of Luwu and the Cenrana valley by Bulbeck and Ian Caldwell, both by archaeologists.
2 On 16th-century Gowa, a lot of sources. If you want the pure, undistilled facts, I refer you to William Cumming's 2007 translation A Chain of Kings: The Makassarese Chronicles of Gowa and Talloq. But check the notes, because Cumming's translation often differs from other historians'. The simplest narrative secondary source, if a bit dated on the archaeological aspect, is the first chapter of Leonard Andaya's The Heritage of Arung Palakka: A History of South Sulawesi in the Seventeenth Century. A lot of articles mention the 16th-century as well, but few exclusively so.
3 Itself a catch-all term for merchants from the Western Archipelago generally. Anakoda Borang, the first leader of the community that would later be known as the Makassar Malays, said that anyone who wears a sarong - from a Cham in central Vietnam to a Minangkabau from southwestern Sumatra - is Malay. See Heather Sutherland's chapter "The Makassar Malays" in Contesting Malayness: Malay Identity Across Boundaries. Also note that in Makassar usage, the word 'Java' (jawa) just means anyone who comes from the Central or Western Archipelago, including Malays. So the Makassar didn't really differentiate different groups of foreign Southeast Asians in language.
4 For the rise of Makassar and its trading networks in the late 1500s, there is good information in Leonard Andaya's chapters "Applying the Seas Perspective to Indonesia" in Early Modern Southeast Asia, 1350-1800 and "Eastern Indonesia: A Study of the Intersection of Global, Regional, and Local Networks in the 'Extended' Indian Ocean" in Reinterpreting Indian Ocean Worlds: Essays in Honour of Kirti N. Chaudhuri.
5 Talloq was a small maritime kingdom that was founded during a succession dispute in Gowa around 1500. It was conquered by Tumapaqrisiq Kallonna and brought into Gowa's fold. But when King Tunipasuluq, who apparently did so many horrible things that the Gowa Chronicle applies damnatio memoriae on him and refuses to mention what he actually did, was kicked out, it was Karaeng Matoaya - king of Talloq - who was at the head. As tumabicara-butta and regent for the new boy king of Gowa, Karaeng Matoaya became the most influential man in South Sulawesi. Archaeologist David Bulbeck's research shows that during the reign of Kng. Matoaya, Matoaya's kingdom Talloq was actually considered more powerful than Gowa, at least as far as we can infer from dynastic marriage trends. During Matoaya's reign Talloq also controlled the port of Makassar. See Bulbeck's chapter "The Politics of Marriage and the Marriage of Polities in Gowa, South Sulawesi, During the 16th and 17th Centuries" in Origins, Ancestry and Alliance: Explorations in Austronesian Ethnography. So I refer to the kingdom as Gowa-Talloq to better reflect this change in the latter's status.
6 Primarily from Anthony Reid's narrative account "A Greet Seventeenth Century Indonesian Family: Matoaya and Pattingalloang of Makasar," one of few English-language narrative sources on the relations between the VOC and Gowa-Talloq.

The First War (cont.)

Sterck's murder and kidnapping of high-ranking Gowa-Talloq nobles did not go forgiven. The English East India Company's archives has this intriguing letter from the English factor in Makassar (letter from George Cokayne to John Jourdain at Banten, August 17 1615):

The king [probably Tumamenang ri Gaukanna, king of Gowa, often referred to by his Arabic name Sultan Ala'uddin] is much grieved in mind and maketh much preparation for war; all the whole land is making of bricks for two castles this summer to be finished; in the armoury is laid ten thousand lances, ten thousand cresses [kris, type of sword] with bucklers to them, spaces [javelins or darts] as many, pieces 2,422; 800 quoyanes [app. 2 tons] of rice for store; all this is to entertain the Flemings [people from Flanders, e.g. the Dutch], for he will not be persuaded but that they will come to offer him some disgrace this next monsoon. [...] Here is news of a Dutch ship that will be here within this six days. The King says that at her arrival here he will send them their house and pagarr [from Malay pagar, 'factory'] upon rafts to them, but not a man to come on land. He will do them all the good he can, but the commonalty will not be pacified but would willingly have them to come on land and put them all to the sword. [...] Yesterday in my sight the King, to see his force and how many men he could make, at an instant were mustered 36,000 men; all these in the kingdom of Macassar [Gowa-Talloq], which will be called together in 24 hours, besides the island [sic, probably mistake for 'inland'] countries as Bugies, Mandar and Tollova.

In other words, the king would still barely tolerate the presence of Dutch ships, but they would be banned from landing. In any case the Dutch presence was not restored. As Cokayne reports, fortresses were built, weapons were readied, and tens of thousands of troops were gathered.
Thus began the first and longest war between Gowa-Talloq and the VOC, but it was an inconsistent war. There was no single campaign, really, like during the Makassar War of the 1660s. The VOC could not afford such a campaign because it was still beset by enemies east and west and its authority in Indonesia was still quite weak outside of Maluku. Instead there were irregular skirmishes as the VOC sought to enforce its proclaimed monopolies on spices.
One of the most important events in the history of the VOC in Indonesia was the genocide of the Bandanese. The Banda Islands, inhabited by 15,000 people in 1620, were the only habitat of Myristica fragrans, the plant that yields the valuable spices nutmeg and mace. Besides trading in nutmeg and mace, Bandanese ships also carried cloves from further north to western markets. This made the Bandanese "the principal local carriers of spices." But the Banda Islands were ruled not by a king, but by an almost 'republican' oligarchy headed by the 'rich men' (orang kaya). The VOC found it difficult to keep a monopoly in Myristica because of this decentralization - the Company would need to defeat the orang kaya individually, and in any case their power was limited. Ultimately, in 1621, the Dutch launched a massive invasion, killed all the orang kaya and the vast majority of the Bandanese, and enslaved hundreds of the survivors. By 1681 the Bandanese population had fallen by more than 99%, and by the next century they were extinct in their homeland.7
However, about a thousand Bandanese - some 7% of the population - managed to escape. In 1624 many settled under the protection of Gowa-Talloq. The Bandanese, well-acquainted with the spice-producing islands, resumed their commercial activities allowed Makassar to become the new focal point of the indigenous spice trade. They were aided in this by the great local hostility for the VOC, which in its ruthless pursuit for profit had ruined the livelihoods of many, to the point that some people from the spice-producing region of Hitu would sell their nutmeg eight times cheaper to traders from Makassar than to the Dutch. Another advantage for Makassar-based merchants was, paradoxically, usually one of the greatest assets of the East India Company; the VOC, as a highly bureaucratic entity, wanted to make locals trade only in specific centers held by the Dutch, while Makassar traders were willing to sail directly to the scattered villages of the spice-producing islands.
While the VOC's monopolies and genocides inadvertently greatly aided Makassar's commercial fortunes, Gowa-Talloq was also bolstered by other internal and external factors (for the former, the rule of Karaeng Matoaya, a highly competent tumabicara-butta or chancellor; for the latter, the campaigns of Sultan Agung in Java which ravaged Javanese ports and redirected their trade to Makassar). By the late 1620s traders from Makassar had grown so much in influence that the VOC's spice monopoly was greatly undermined. In December 1632 alone, 37 tons of cloves were sold from Makassar to England in open defiance of the Dutch.
Indonesian merchants based in Makassar - at this point primarily Makassar Malays and Bandanese - pioneered new routes to avoid the Dutch fleets and posts. The main center of Dutch authority in North Maluku was the island of Ternate, off the western coast of the main Malukan island of Halmahera. Traditionally, ships would sail directly eastwards from South Sulawesi, which lies west of Maluku, to North Maluku. But now there were often Dutch fleets off the western coast, so merchant fleets would sail in an extremely roundabout way around Halmahera, arriving at Halmahera's western coast from the east. And when the Dutch chased the 'smugglers,' as they called all merchants based in Makassar, they were often befuddled by their enemies' small ships; they would go up a creek or hide in a narrow strait between two islets, and the Dutch would find it very difficult to pursue the enemy. And even if the Dutch did destroy ships from Makassar, annually there were 150 to 200 ships that sailed east from South Sulawesi; with the limited resources of the VOC, these were far too many ships to deal with entirely. The sultan of Ternate's recruitment of Malukan canoes to help his ally the VOC maintain its monopoly was also not very successful. So, says historian of Indonesian trade Leonard Andaya, "the Makassarese were therefore able to fill their limited cargo space with desired products from the east with only occasional interference from the Dutch."8
The VOC grew increasingly frustrated. This is what the Royal Diaries of Gowa report for the years 1634-1635 (William Cumming's 2010 translation, published under the title The Makassar Annals):

February 13, 1634: Dutch ships arrived, twelve in number including the small ones.

By February 1634 the Dutch had chosen to blockade the port of Makassar. It was the first time in history that the great city had been attacked, and must certainly have caused consternation among the ruling elite.

February 19: The [Dutch] ships that neared Paqnakukkang [major fort in Makassar city] were fired upon
March 9: A manuscript arrived from Buton [one of the vassals of Gowa-Talloq] commemorating their oath [of loyalty] at Bau-Bau
May 23: People worked on an earthen wall from Ujung Pandang to Somba Opu [these are two of the greatest forts in Makassar city]
May 28: Lae-Lae destroyed
July 17: The karaeng [king, here Sultan Ala'uddin] went up to Popoq to take the burned galley
July 29: [Ala'uddin] went over to Paqnakukkang to dwell as its stonework was rebuilt
August 9: Ujung Pandang first fortified with stone
November 15: Banner ritually blooded (naniceraq batea) at Ujung Pandang

Throughout the year of 1634 we have a frenzy of military activity. The Dutch are destroying settlements near Makassar and even attacking stone castles defended with cannons like Paqnakukkang; correspondingly, the fortifications of the port of Makassar are being strengthened. The loyalty of Gowa-Talloq's vassals, including Buton (the most rebellious of Makassar's vassals), is reaffirmed. The royal banners are smeared with buffalo blood as part of a pre-Islamic ceremony performed before major wars to imbue special power to the banner (blood was a sacred liquid, and by applying it to royal banners the peoples of South Sulawesi invoked their ancestors to help them in battle).9 The government in Makassar must have been seriously concerned, faced with a strong attack from a foe of similar power for the first time since several decades.
The war continued in 1635, as I will recount in Part III.
7 For Banda and its history, see R. F. Ellen's On the Edge of the Banda Zone: Past and Present in the Social Organization of a Moluccan Trading Network
8 For Makassar's economy in the early 17th century I relied especially on the following, but also check out articles by Heather Sutherland:

• John Villier's "One of the Especiallest Flowers in our Garden : The English Factory at Makassar, 1613-1667" and "Makassar : The Rise and Fall of an East Indonesian Maritime Trading State : 1512-1669"
• Leonard Andaya's "Eastern Indonesia: A Study of the Intersection of Global, Regional and Local Networks in the 'Extended' Indian Ocean in Reinterpreting Indian Ocean Worlds and "Local Trade Networks in Maluku in the 16th, 17th, and 18th Centuries"
• Anthony Reid's "A Greet Seventeenth Century Indonesian Family: Matoaya and Pattingalloang of Makasar" and "Pluralism and Progress in Seventeenth-century Makassar"

9 See Leonard Andaya's "Nature of war and peace among the Bugis–Makassar people" for an extended treatise on tactics, weapons, and ideology in warfare in South Sulawesi.

The First War (cont. cont.)

So, yeah, the war continued in 1635. To follow the narrative presented in the Gowa royal diaries again:

January 6: Karaeng ri Suli [a tumailalang, or Minister of the Interior, of Gowa] entered Darombo because it is said that Luwuq [traditional ally of Gowa] is hostile
April 30: Stonework at Barombong [on the southern end of the lines of fortification around Makassar] strengthened; the number of people [defending] Somba Opu total 855
June 13: The Dutch fired up at Galesong [a coastal quarter of Makassar city]
June 23: The people at Somba Opu laid stones at the gate
August 25: The people of Bone [vassal of Gowa] ask permission to strengthen Pallatte

Into 1635, Gowa-Talloq sought to ensure the loyalty of its allies and vassals such as Luwuq. It continued to strengthen its fortifications, even as the Dutch bombarded areas of the coastline. The final entry, about Bone wanting to fortify Pallatte, is also intriguing. Pallatte is on the eastern coast of Sulawesi's South Peninsula, on the opposite side as Makassar. So it is possible that the Dutch were not only attacking Makassar, but also its vassals in other areas in South Sulawesi. Of course, this remains conjecture.1
But despite this impressive display of naval power, on land Gowa-Talloq's legitimacy remained supreme. Hence an entry in the Diaries from 1636:

February 29, 1636: The Dutch hoped to turn the people of Bulo-Bulo [near Gowa, to rebel against Gowa and Talloq] and pledged that in 300 days and nights we would be attacked [by the VOC, but instead the Dutchmen] were killed by the people of Bulo-Bulo

Now, what did this mean to "everyday life"? Did the "average person have much to fear from the VOC/Dutch"? This is an interesting question that is much more difficult to answer than the political history of the Gowa-VOC war I have just recounted, since local sources are largely silent to the affairs of commoners while the VOC, although somewhat better in this respect, still devotes more attention to the more commercially influential nobility. Still, we can divide the VOC's potential influences on the common man and woman into direct and indirect (and largely inadvertent) influences.

Direct influences

As discussed above, in the early 17th century the Dutch were largely unable to curb the hundreds of ships sailing east from Makassar to collect cloves, nutmeg, mace, and other expensive spices. But here's the catch - especially in this early period, those involved in shipping were generally the Makassar Malays, Indian Muslims, and Europeans. So the Dutch blockades or attacks on shipping did not directly harm a Makassar or Bugis (and as stated, the Dutch monopoly was not very effectively maintained by 1630).
The Dutch blockade of 1634-1635 and its attacks on areas of the city would have posed a direct threat to the locals. However, consider where most of the population lived. Here are the archaeological estimates of population distribution and density near Makassar city in the few first decades after 1600, from David Bulbeck's surveys around 1990:
​

Coast	Immediate hinterland	Inland
32% of total population	22.1%	45.9%
1369/km2	1232/km2	782km2

Even in the Gowa-Talloq area, by far the most urbanized area of South Sulawesi, the majority of the population did not live immediately by the sea. And Makassar was an extraordinarily large city. A more typical port town in South Sulawesi might have been Bantaeng, on the southern coast of the peninsula, which probably had less than 10,000 people.12 Dutch coastal raids could not have directly affected the majority of the population.
So in the early 17th century the VOC could not have been going around killing large numbers of people in South Sulawesi. The Company probably did cause hardship for locals - but not because of the Company's depredations per se, but because of Gowa and other kingdoms' reaction to Dutch incursions.
In South Sulawesi, mass labor is generally recruited and managed by a corvee system in which each noble brought his dependents (ata, serfs or slaves) to work on the project. The ata were not payed, but did the work as part of their obligation for their lord. And while modern studies of this system generally show great genuine loyalty to their lord on the part of the ata, Gowa-Talloq also coerced their conquered vassals to send their own people to work on Gowa's projects. In 1660, for example, 10,000 Bugis from Bone were employed to dig a canal. These corvee labors imposed on the conquered by the conqueror were expected but disliked - especially since it involved forced deportation of thousands from their homelands - and could be a cause for rebellion. The VOC's threat to average livelihoods, insofar as it existed, was forcing Gowa-Talloq to employ corvee labor.13

Indirect influences

As I said above, the VOC's activities in Maluku, along with other external events such as Sultan Agung's Javanese wars, contributed to Makassar's astonishing affluence up to the 1640s. So the greatest indirect influence of the VOC on South Sulawesi in the first third of the 17th century must be its contribution to local urbanization. With non-Dutch centers of the spice trade eliminated, Makassar stood firm as the only great entrepot where competitors of the Dutch could acquire cheaper spices.
This trade - often summarized as the 'textile for spices' trade, in which foreign merchants sold Indian textiles and other luxury goods to Makassar and bought spices, while Makassar-based traders distributed textiles in both Sulawesi and overseas in spice producing areas in return for purchasing spices and other commodities - provided South Sulawesi with unprecedented numbers of foreign luxury goods, such as sugar, tobacco, horses, and (especially Indian) textiles. The city of Makassar at its height may have had a population of 160,000. This urbanized and commercialized population - which may have represented more than 10% of the population of the entire island of Sulawesi14 - became ever more cosmopolitan, more 'civilized' in the eyes of outsiders. So a Spanish missionary said:

The nearer we drew to Makassar [...] the more civilized we found the people.

And for a Muslim observer the differences might be even more striking. In 1607 Makassar was described thus:

The various fruits of India abound there, also goats, buffaloes, and pigs [...] men carry usually one, two, or more balls in their penis, of the same size as those of Siam, but not hollow or clinking, rather of ivory or solid fishbone [...] the female slaves whom one sees carrying water in the back streets have their upper body with the breasts completely naked, and wear trousers which come up to the navel. When they wash they stand mother-naked, the men as well as women.

Forty years later it was reported:

There are [...] no hogs at all because the natives, who are Mohammedans, have exterminated them entirely from the country [...] the women are entirely covered from head to foot, in such fashion that not even their faces can be seen.

Even accounting for orientalism and common European generalizations of Muslims, the urban civilization of Makassar (if not Gowa-Talloq, or South Sulawesi, as a whole) had evolved rapidly from an animist society to a Muslim one, to the point of being the birthplace of major Muslim scholars such as Muhammad Yusuf al-Maqassari (1626-1699).15
This transformation dues much to the VOC. But while the Dutch were a major factor in Makassar's rise, it was not the major factor. We must not forget the internal policies implemented by Gowa-Talloq's government, especially its declaration of free trade in the port of Makassar, drawing all non-Dutch trade, and its military reforms which created an army that could stand toe-to-toe with the Company's forces. While recognizing the importance of the Dutch, we must not disregard how people in South Sulawesi made their own history.
Part 4, probably the final post, will discuss the Dutch-Gowa relationship from 1637 to 1655 and the Dutch-associated commercial downturn of the early 1650s.
10 Unfortunately, Bone did not begin keeping royal diaries until after the Makassar War, during the reign of La Tenritatta Arung Palakka (r.1672-1696).
11 p.462 in Tale of Two Kingdoms: The Historical Archaeology of Gowa and Tallok
12 Per Andaya in his history of South Sulawesi in the late 17th century (The Heritage of Arung Palakka: South Sulawesi in the Seventeenth Century), when the city of Bantaeng was laid waste by Arung Palakka and his Dutch allies in 1667, a thousand houses were destroyed. This suggests that the number of houses in Bantaeng did not greatly exceed one thousand. Wayne Bougas in his article "Bantayan: An Early Makassarese Kingdom, 1200 AD-1600 AD" argues that the population was between 5,000-7,500.
13 See description in "Pluralism and Progress in Seventeenth-Century Makassar" by Reid. The ata system was the most common, but not the only, means of mobilizing labor in 17th-century South Sulawesi. There were a number of craftsmen's guilds in Makassar, each obliged to perform specific duties relating to their craft for the court. The guilds were under state control through the state-appointed post of guildmaster.
14 Anthony Reid, in his Southeast Asia in the Age of Commerce, estimates that Sulawesi had 1.2 million people around 1600.
15 Both quotes from Anthony Reid's article "The Islamization of Southeast Asia." The Spanish missionary referred to is Domingo Fernández Navarrete. Yusuf al-Maqassari is discussed extensively in Azyumardi Azra's The Origins of Islamic Reformism in Southeast Asia, p. 87-108.
​
The thread's comments 4 and 5 will follow shortly in Part II!