Hilarous jokes and riddles that are actualy interesting and funny

For images that are funny as well as sad.

2013.11.25 07:21 mtenay For images that are funny as well as sad.

For images that are funny and sad.
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2008.01.25 07:36 Humor

For all things funny!
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2009.07.25 20:50 viper565 antijokes

Jokes that aren’t jokes
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2024.05.16 22:52 No_Shirt2198 23 [M4F] #Texas or #Online - Looking for a down to earth connection

Hello, I graduated college a year ago, moved to Austin, and started a job. I'm a bit of a homebody, finding comfort in the coziness of my own space. I'm seeking a genuine connection with the right woman that shares my interests and appreciates me.
Who I am:
I'm a 6ft, average build, mild-mannered guy with a good sense of humor. My main hobby is PC gaming. I am a competitive person and I enjoy games like League of Legends and Escape from Tarkov. I also would love to find someone I can play co-op games with as well, like Stardew Valley or Minecraft.
I really enjoy watching YouTube, tv shows, and movies. I mostly watch thought-provoking video essays or gameplay videos. Some tv shows I'm interested in and looking forward to watching are Survivor, House of the Dragon (S2), Severance (S2), The Acolyte. I'm also always down to watch a random episode of Parks and Rec or The Office.
I have a creative side and I like making goofy memes for my friends about inside jokes or just funny stuff I think of. I've been doing origami off and on since middle school and it's fun from time to time. I'm also into building models and I have a friend that's teaching me to paint miniatures as well.
Who you are:
I'm searching for someone that is 21-25 years old, close to finishing college or already in a career, and shares my mindset and some of my interests. I would like you to be confident and content with yourself and a good communicator. Honestly, just be true to yourself and be able to hold a conversation and have interests of your own.
Some thoughts:
I am all about good. meaningful communication. I'm looking for someone that is willing to put in the effort to form a real bond. I believe relationships are a two-way street and both partners have to give and take equal amounts.
I would prefer to text and voice chat on discord. After our introductions, I'd like to exchange pictures so that we both have a clear idea of each other's appearance. If you made it through my post and are interested in getting to know me then please shoot me a message.
submitted by No_Shirt2198 to r4r [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 22:34 Informal_Path5291 Retrospective from an M7 first year international. To make friends and be socially popular, you have to "add Value"

This may be basic common knowledge around social skills, but as an international student, I found these principles are not often explicitly taught and vary across time and culture. I'm from India to be exact, which has a very different culture in the US.
It's confusing, because if you ask people what qualities they like in friends, they'll say stuff like they love people who are kind, dependable, loyal, genuine, authentic, etc. But I've noticed that these people either lie when they say that, or that's not the full truth. Judge by their actions, not words, as they say.
In my M7 MBA, I have seen that those who have successfully. been able to make friends and be socially popular and well liked are those who took the time and effort to "add value" in their relationships.
"Adding value" from my observations can take multiple forms. First way is to be conventionally very attractive - people like others who are beautiful, hot, cute, etc. Being an 8/10 physically is good. If you're not naturally good looking, then doing everything possible in your power to be your most conventionally attractive best self is valued, such as working out regularly, eating a good diet, conforming to fashion trends, having good styles, etc. Women are especially adept at knowing skincare and makeup techniques.
The second is being famous. We have someone in our class who is famous on social media, with several hundred thousand social media followers. They are automatically elevated in social situations with people wanting to be their friend. This person has on multiple occasions been an asshole to others and isn't the most conventionally attractive, but our classmates give them a pass. The rules aren't fair or the same for everyone.
Third, if you're neither famous or conventionally good looking, there is a premium on being funny. People like those who give them a good laugh. Having good humor, conversational timing, ability to make jokes on the fly and have wit are very valued.
These three qualities completely supersede others, including being kind, genuine, authentic, loyal, etc. In terms of males, the top of the pecking order are tall, white men. White women are also on top socially, with some East Asians.
Outside of these, I'e seen you really have to put in effort to add value. You need to do things like be a good cook and host events where you cook for your classmates. You need to do something "cool" like be a foodie and have a food blog for spots near campus. Another way to "add value" is be a good DJ and offer to DJ at parties that people host. You need to say, take the initiative to host themed house parties or organize a domestic or international trek or a ski trip. If you're the organizer of an in-demand social event, people gravitate to you and want to be friends.
Not all hobbies are created equal. Those that people value are ones that add value to their personal lives, such as being a food or travel blogger, or DJing at a party. Social hobbies like biking or organizing workout classes are praised. Something relatable to people. One person is a amazing classical pianist, but classical music is seen as a solitary, niche, boring hobby that doesn't generate much praise or interest, despite how talented the classmate is.
It seems the social scene here runs on a "social currency" system where the people who take the effort to cook for others, organize events and trips, do cool and interesting things, etc., are the ones rewarded with the most invites to birthdays, parties, trips, etc. And outside of that, if you're really good looking, funny, or famous, you have a ton of social leeway and need to put in way less effort.
Looks DO matter. People DO judge based on appearances. I've noticed very few in the "cool" group are overweight - and the few who ware are EXCEPTIONALLY funny. And looking physically good takes a lot of effort in and of itself, including knowing how to work out, eat right, apply makeup if you're a girl etc.
On top of this, you need to be lacking in negative traits. People who are overly eager, try to hard, or seen as needy have quickly been excommunicated from the social scene. They often do it without realizing it: in Indian culture, being very forward is often the norm but it's too intense for American culture. People like those who are seen as cool, chill, and interesting, and fun. People base friendships in reality on those who are "fun and chill" to be around. You can't be someone who is overly quiet and doesn't say anything, and sucks at conversational timing in group settings and be awkward, nor can you be overly gregarious and too loud and annoying.
You cannot only talk about non-mainstream, overly nerdy, or niche interests, UNLESS you are exceptionally conventionally attractive or famous. Catan game nights seem to be OK though. Many social events are at house parties, bars, clubs, etc., and are based on drinking. The non drinkers who are popular ADD VALUE by taking the initiative to offer to be designated drivers. But if you don't offer that as a non drinker, you may get penalized socially.
There are plenty of pro-DEI, heavy liberal (at least on social issues) on campus, and they will say things like they want to be friends with like minded socially progressive folks. But even among that crowd, physical appearance, your level of fame, and funniness TRUMP ALL and you have to add value. One person in class is a very physically attractive open Republican, and even the liberals in class like him. The Republicans who are ostracized are conservative ON TOP of not being funny, not attractive, not having unique hobbies, etc. And the most vocal liberal activist in class is disliked for not being attractive, funny, interesting, etc.
People will outwardly say they support mental health destigmatization, and may genuinely believe it, but don't want to actually befriend someone going through symptoms of anxiety or depression. You're allowed to mildly vulnerable about every day common relatable issues, like struggling with recruiting, but can never reveal very serious personal issues like having an eating disorder. That'll weird people out. You have to be mostly positive and happy.
Again, this may all be common sense. But a lot of these rules aren't explicitly taught, especially if you're from a different culture. It may seem transactional on the outside, but this is what I've seen to be reality at my M7.
submitted by Informal_Path5291 to MBA [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 21:57 hoggersbridge Engines of Arachnea: The Bug World (Chapter 20: The God Speaks)

Link for all the chapters available here: Engines of Arachnea on Royal Road
Deep in the groaning halls of sinew and bone he awaited his audience with the god. At a wave of his hand the ribs which held up the ceiling contracted, tendons shifting within the pink walls of the chamber as the jagged, calcareous spurs that composed the doorway sank back into the spongy masses of tissue, revealing a passage curving down and out of sight.
Menash stood before the yawning portal and considered eternity. This was no an idle thought: here in the Dawning Chamber, the concept was very real. His father, Yulan, had stood in this exact spot times beyond count. When he was struck down in his prime by the Night Weaver and her Leaper offspring, torn limb from limb as he fought to defend Chthonis from a raiding party, Menash’s uncle, Aqavarr, had carried his broken remains over that grinning threshold to join the hosts of the dead, never to return.
A hot and heavy exhalation rattled up out of the depths, wafting in the acrid scent of the bonding pools and the wet slithering sound of the rebirthing canals. Menash felt a crackle of static in the corners of his mind before the signal sharpened and he heard It whisper distinctly:
“Enter…”
The familiar dread crept its way up the small of his back, and he gave a little shiver. No matter how many times he had communed with the Vitalus, he’d never been able to shake the feeling of his utter insignificance. But he persevered, walking bravely down the slurping passage, past the rows of broad antechambers lining either side of the hallway. Each one held a slumbering shape immersed in a cryogenic bath, towering hulks of muscle encased in ribbed and riveted plates of chitin. No two were alike in size or physiology, but all seemed to emanate the same primeval aura of dread that tickled Menash’s fight-or-flight-instinct, skewing it very much towards the latter response. These were the Hollowores, soulless avatars of the Vitalus, each one a tool capable of eradicating an entire species. As Menash approached, one of the living weapons stirred to life. A pronged, anvil-shaped head emerged from the bath, umbilical feeder tubes detaching from its armored flanks as the rest of its bulk followed, its mauve exoskeleton as sleek and shiny as amethyst. The Hollowore extended legs as thick as grown pine trees and lifted itself above him, its pairs of crushing pincers dripping amniotic fluids as it herded him towards the central room.
Bundles of white gossamer filaments spread all across the floor, encircling steaming pools of pus and acid. He saw arms and legs, sensory organs and entire exoskeletons being knitted before his very eyes, the amino acid chains being stitched on a layer at a time, the weeping pus evidence of microphages fighting off possible infections as the Vitalus did Its work.
These were the next generation of exomorphs, yet to be assigned to their hosts. It was here that Vitalus constantly improved the only thing that could ensure the continued survival of Menash’s subspecies. Exomorphs were bonded to Gallivants at birth, the organisms supplying their hosts with the means to breathe an atmosphere they was never meant to endure, and the strength to fight in a world that was red in tooth and claw. They were as swift as the summer wind and could multiply their host’s muscular power by up to twelve times their natural output.
But for all their God-given might, Gallivants were still mortal. They could and often did perish in the endless struggle for existence that the Vitalus called the Great Game. But even in death they could still commit their essence to posterity, passing down their defining traits through the malleable genetic code of the gilt helix. It was the Vitalus’ greatest boon; through the gilt helix a single individual could become a progenitor of an entire generation, becoming at one stroke the father of whole nations and peoples.
One day he too would prove worthy of the honor that Yulan had earned with his life. But he was not alone in that ambition. Menash was annoyed to find the crimson-clad Vezda and the cowardly Racek waiting for him inside, standing next to a large ball of filaments that hung from a tonsil-like growth hanging from the walls.
This node pulsed, emitting a small storm of bioelectric activity, networks of fungi conveying commands in the form of oscillating voltages to their communities of symbiotic bacteria, the latter containing greigite mineral crystals aligned in the shape of electromagnetic coils. Other networks hidden in the walls modulated and amplified the signals, and the three Gallivants steeled themselves for the onrushing flood of information as the Vitalus tapped into their minds.
He was a candle before the raging heart of the thunderstorm. For an instant Menash touched a fraction of Its intelligence, the divisions of time and space rolling back as they joined the ocean of shared consciousness, becoming one with the living systems of Arachnea. From the tiniest aeroplankton floating above the waves of the golden coastlines, to the herds of ultrapods munching their way through swathes of trees in the savannahs. Menash felt himself pushing up out of the soil, longing and lusting and reaching for the sunlight with a trillion green fingers uncurling, alive with the furious movement of life.
But what was that flicker of orange to the east? That searing heat, that prickling pain spreading like a cancer down his side?
The Vitalus scooped them up and hurled them headlong into hell itself. A roaring wildfire was sweeping into the heart of the eastern rainforests. Menash tasted ash and ruin, felt pieces of himself wither and burn, his branches tongues of fire, wood cracking from the intense blaze, sap boiling instantaneously upon contact and rupturing, splitting him right down the grain. He fled in terror, running, slithering, digging, swimming, flying away in crazed panic from the walls of red death closing in on him. As his skin flaked off in clumps of charcoal he looked back and saw it towering over the treetops, the epicenter of this howling vortex of destruction: the grey behemoth. Its burnished metal hide gleamed like copper, reflecting the fury of the conflagration burning well into the night.
Menash pulled his mind away before it was lost forever in the storm of electric potentials. He saw Racek and Vezda swaying on their feet, breathing hard and fast.
“Heart of the World,” he managed to gasp, “What is your bidding?”
The Hollowore maneuvered itself until it was facing him directly. Tiny beady eyes fixed him in their blank gaze. The node emitted a blue pulse and the creature shuddered as it received the signal. It opened a maw powerful enough to chew boulders into gravel and rumbled:
“This one is the alpha which survived first contact with anomalous variable. It will tell Us what occurred, and from whence this threat emerged.”
“It came from the karst mountain range, where the yellowjacket Amit live,” Menash replied, “It was destroying the largest mound in that area, massacring its inhabitants. It brought the mountain down on them—we’ve never seen anything like it. Zildiz was the first on the scene. She warned us not to approach, and that it was dangerous, but some of us,” here he cast an angry look at Vezda, “Some of us went ahead and tried to scavenge from the bodies of the dying. Then the behemoth ignited the air and burned scores of us to cinders.”
“Irrational. Why did you do this?”
“W-we thought that you had spawned the grey behemoth,” Menash stammered, embarrassed to say the least, “That it was the newest addition to the Great Game, another species of ultrafauna that would help perfect Arachnea.”
“Not so. It was made by an evil far older than the All-In-One,” replied the Vitalus, “It is called a Divine Engine. In cycles past, this evil sought to undo this world and all that inhabit it. In that, it almost succeeded.”
Menash felt his blood run cold at those words.
“Is it the only one of its kind?” Racek piped up. Menash and Vezda both bristled at his interruption; subordinates were only supposed to speak when spoken to.
“There were several deployed here in Our infancy. We had thought them all destroyed in the War of Creation.”
“Your Munificence,” Racek went on, heedless of the venomous looks he was getting from the other two, “Most of us survived because Zildiz persuaded us to dive into the river. She saved all our lives! But as I washed up on the riverbank, I saw the behemoth casting a seedpod into the skies. I did not see where it landed, but it was travelling in a high arc due east. Is this the behemoth’s method of reproducing? If so, then how many offspring can it generate from this one seed?”
The Vitalus met his questions with a minute of silence. Menash had never known It to take so long to respond to a query, and felt another stab of unease in his gut. Unless he was imagining things, the Vitalus seemed genuinely disturbed by the scenario that Racek has raised, enough to convince Menash that the danger was far from hypothetical.
“That is a distant possibility,” It said somewhat cryptically, “Regardless, We cannot allow the Engine’s continued existence.”
“Then it must be destroyed,” Vezda said, her barbed tail eagerly perking up.
“We are not certain that it can be,” the Vitalus said, and Menash heard Racek audibly gulp at the admission.
“But Your Omniscience, you alone are the arbiter of growth and decay,” Vezda said in disbelief, “Surely you can unmake this monster as well?”
“Perhaps. The Divine Engines were built to withstand the extremes of temperature, gravity, atmospheric pressure, acidity and irradiation found on semi-inhabitable exoplanets. Worlds of bareness and desolation, glassed by thermonuclear bombardment or infested with alien microorganisms. In the wars of Our youth, the Betrayers used tungsten-alloy warheads fired from space platforms to crack their bulkheads. Not even Our vessels, the Hollowores, could damage them in any significant way. We will need time to gather the raw materials and fabricate the weapons needed to end this threat.”
“What must we do?” Menash asked.
“If this variable is not dealt with, it could upset the delicate balance We have sacrificed so much to achieve. Already the wildfire it has caused will release close to 400 million metric tons of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere and destroy 2.3 million acres of forest before Our countermeasures can stop it. Time is our limiting factor. If the Engine cannot be destroyed now, it must be restrained.”
“It hasn’t moved an inch since we last saw it,” Vezda said brightly, “Maybe it has already died?”
“Yes, and maybe your mother was a horka toad,” Racek said snidely. Vezda scowled and took a step towards him, then stopped as she remembered that she trod on hallowed ground.
“Not so. It has merely gone dormant. Having expended its fuel, it is now running on the bare minimum of its reserves. My children, you must ensure that it does not wake again. Establish a quarantine zone around the Engine and let none approach, on pain of death. The Leaper kindreds will secure the ground while the Gallivants patrol the skies.”
Vezda and Menash exchanged troubled looks. Nobody wanted Leapers establishing a foothold in what was essentially a buffer zone between their subspecies. Once allowed to settle in a habitat, it would not take long for them to adapt and become masters of their new territory. Ousting them would become a battle of attrition, and given the lower birthrates of Gallivants, it was not one they could long afford.
“Respectfully, we do not require assistance from our brother kindred,” Menash ventured, “We are more than capable of safeguarding the area ourselves.”
The node throbbed again, the bioelectric flashes taking on an angry purple hue. With a sound like the grinding of a millstone the Hollowore clashed its claws together impatiently. All three of the mortals took a hasty step back.
“The alpha will obey, or another will be found that can,” the Vitalus growled at them, “All subspecies will observe a general truce during this period. This is a temporary addition to the Great Game. Those that serve Us well shall be rewarded. We shall also enlist the aid of your terrestrial cousins, as well as the Cataphract clans to replenish the soil, and lone Saints who shall rove beyond the quarantine zone.”
Menash’s unease deepened. The Vitalus was bringing together four different kindreds, some of which killed each other on sight, in a move that reeked of desperation. The kindreds had worked together before, of course, on complex projects such as altering rainfall patterns and husbanding struggling species, but never so many at once. This was bound to end in bloodshed.
“Those that break the truce shall be chemically neutered, and their gilt helix purged from the existing gene pool,” the Vitalus continued, “You will maintain this quarantine until We have dealt with the Engine.”
“It is understood!” Menash and Vezda said at once.
“But what about Zildiz?” Racek blurted out, again risking his entire lineage by speaking out of turn, “She might still be alive out there!”
“He’s right,” Menash found himself agreeing despite his dislike for Racek, “She’s our alpha, after all. It would be a shame to lose her helix. Do we have your leave to send out a party to recover her?”
The Vitalus pondered the request for a moment, then crushed his hopes when it said:
“Regrettable, the loss of the female. Valuable stock for the breeding program. But it has not responded to Our signals—it is unlikely to have survived. The female Vezda shall take up its duties as alpha.”
“But Your Benevolence—” both men cried out in unison.
“It is decided. She has risked the Great Game, and must abide by its outcome. To speak more on this would risk Our displeasure,” the god warned.
“We can’t spare the manpower anyway,” Vezda pointed out, trying not to look too pleased at Its decision. She darted a quick look at Menash, long enough for him to see the selfish desire festering in her heart. He turned away from her in disgust, baring his blades by the slightest of margins to let her know what he thought of her, then asked the Vitalus:
“But what of the Engine’s seedpod? Should we search for it?”
“Negative!” the Vitalus boomed, its node reinforcing the word with a spike of activity that sent needles of pain spearing into their heads, “We shall complete this task. It is dangerous and can be entrusted to no other.”
The Hollowore angled its massive head towards the cavernous ceiling, armored flaps on its back sliding aside as it unfurled sets of rigid sixty-meter wings. A wide sphincter on the roof gaped open and Menash saw the evening sky awash with the stars in their milky multitudes. The Hollowore took a deep breath through the spiracles lining its thorax and abdomen, pumping air through a pair of hollow tube-like protuberances under either of its wings. Menash and the others quickly scampered to a safe distance. Seconds later there was a scream of chemical combustion and the Hollowore rose into the evening skies, leaving behind a long trail of superheated gases, the backwash almost knocking Menash off his feet. They watched as the Hollowore gained altitude, making straight for the columns of billowing smoke on the horizon, a sweeping shadow blotting out the light of the heavens.
The Vitalus’ mental presence receded with it. When it did not return, they took it to mean that they were dismissed and likewise took flight and headed for Chthonis. They were hardly out of the Dawning Chamber when Vezda seized the scrawny Racek by his wings and anchored her feet right up against his back.
“Funny little man, are you? Crack jokes at my expense again, and I’ll see to it that you’ll never fly again!” she snarled, yanking hard. Racek yelled as his wings threatened to pop out of their sockets.
“Stop!” Menash said, ramming his shoulder into her and knocking the smaller male out of her grip. Vezda rounded on him, blades out and her tail aquiver with rage.
“As for you! No one should speak to the Vitalus like that!” she shrieked, “Much less gainsay It! Are you trying to get us all killed? It is the source and continuance of life itself—”
“But the Vitalus doesn’t always consider the individual scale of things,” Menash reasoned, controlling his rising anger as he tried to defuse the situation, “Its scope of thought is beyond ours. Therefore it is up to us to look after each other. None of us can win the Great Game alone. We need people like Zildiz for the species to prosper.”
“Your logic is flawed,” Vezda spat, “Empathy is a sham devised by the selfish action of the gene, which seeks only to preserve itself. At least I am honest enough to look after my own interests. Your obsession with that whore is misplaced. Heed my words, Menash. What happened today marks a change in the Great Game. Only the ruthless will reap the rewards of this era. Think on that, and act accordingly.”
The female darted off in another direction, leaving the two behind.
“Thanks,” Racek said, rubbing at his sore shoulders, “My, my. She’s really taking her promotion very seriously, isn’t she?”
“This doesn’t make us friends,” Menash said shortly, “We share a common interest, that’s all.”
The two flew together in silence for a time, the dark canopy unrolling below their feet. Racek had always been a bitter rival for Zildiz’s affections. In the mating seasons he and Menash had flown the damsel-dance against each other countless times, racing and dogfighting at top speed through the dense bamboo thickets in an effort to impress her.
But each time she had always chosen Menash. Naturally. He was the stronger, the braver, the son of the Scourge who had slain hundreds on his lightning raids into Leaper territory. Their pairings had been brief and passionate, yet she had always laughed at the end and gone on her merry way, a rose petal borne on a scented breeze, the dalliance as meaningless to her as other concerns like eating or breathing.
But not to him. Right now, all that mattered was her. And Racek was the only one in the whole wide world who knew exactly how he felt. Did that mean he could be trusted? Menash considered the enormity of what he was about to do, and wavered. Then he saw her face in the darkness of his home, the face she wore when they were all alone together, and he took a deep breath before breaking the silence, saying:
“I’ll be in charge of the quarantine. I can arrange for you to disappear for a few days. I can have one of the younglings mimic your magnetosynaptic signal, make it seem like you’re with the rest of us.”
“You’d do that? For me?” Racek said in astonishment.
“Hah. Not for you,” Menash laughed softly. He looked Racek straight in the eyes and continued: “What’ll it be, then?”
If he so much as hesitates, I’ll have to kill him here and now, Menash told himself.
“Why, yes. Yes, of course!” the little brown male said vigorously.
“Good,” Menash sighed with relief, “She’ll be very grateful to whoever brings her home. I’d do it myself, but as an alpha I can’t risk being seen as disobedient.”
“Then why give me this chance? After all that’s passed between us?”
“I should have thought that was obvious,” Menash replied. Racek digested that for a bit, then out of nowhere said:
“If I find her—when I find her—I’ll tell her exactly who it was that sent me.”
“That won’t be necessary.”
“Bah! Just so we’re even, that’s all,” Racek grinned, his mouthparts slanting askew.
“Thanks, I guess. I’d…I’d appreciate that. You do understand what we’re risking here, right?”
“Sure. We’ll be total genetic write-offs if we’re caught. But it’s not like I wanted to see tiny ugly Raceks running around the house anyway. What about you, though? Why are you putting your neck on the chopping block?”
“You know why,” Menash said quietly, his thoughts still lingering on her face.
“Yes,” Racek agreed with a wistful air, “Yes, I suppose I do.”
And the pair spoke no more until they reached Chthonis.
Link for all the chapters available here: Engines of Arachnea on Royal Road
submitted by hoggersbridge to HFY [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 21:00 Sola_Sista_94 Cookies 'n' Dreams: Parts Eleven and Twelve (Fanfic)

The next morning, Himiko was awakened by a delighted scream. She shot up in her bed and saw Tenko dancing around the room.
"Nyeh...Tenko? W-What's going on?" Himiko asked sleepily, rubbing her eyes.
"La-la-la-la-la-laaaaaa!!" Tenko sang. Then, she stopped at Himiko's bed and gripped Himiko's shoulders like a crazy person. "Himiko! I ate your Snoozydoodles right before bed, like you told me to, and I just had the most amazing dream!!"
"What was it about?" Himiko asked.
"There were no degenerate males in the world! And all the girls made me their queen!" Tenko sighed. "It was perfect utopia! A utopia...for girls! The sky was pastel pink! The clouds were extra puffy and white! The ocean was also pink and glittery, and all the food we ate was pink, like strawberry cake, strawberry ice cream, strawberry cupcakes, and strawberry milk! And girls of every shape, size, and color were everywhere! Not a degenerate male in sight!"
"Nyeh...a dream filled with just girls sounds like a nightmare," Himiko muttered. "Most problems I had with bullying was from catty, popular girls."
"W-What?! There's no way that's true, Himiko!" Tenko cried. "Maybe they were males in disguise!"
"No, I don't think so," Himiko shook her head. "Plus, a world with just girls is going to lead to extinction."
"Not in my dream!" Tenko exclaimed happily. "Girls were born from 'Girl Flowers!'"
"Nyeeeh...girl flowers? " Himiko asked, raising a brow.
"Yeah! You plant a pink seed into the ground, and when it grows, the petals open up and reveal a beautiful baby girl inside!" Tenko gushed. "It was so amazing! Girls, girls, girls everywhere!" Himiko wrinkled her nose.
"I bet it smelled like fish in that world," she muttered.
"Fish?! Why would it smell like-...oh! Hahahaha!" Tenko said. "No, no, Himiko! We didn't have to deal with that because there was need for it! All the girls came from 'Girl Flowers,' remember?"
"Oh...I guess that's true," Himiko replied, shaking her head at the absurdity. Suddenly, there was a knock at their door. Tenko went over to open it. Standing on the other side were Tsumugi, Angie, Maki, Miu, Gonta, Ryoma, and Kaito.
"Hey! What are you all doing here?!" Tenko demanded. "Especially you degenerates!" Ignoring Tenko, they all rushed right in and crowded around Himiko's bed. Himiko nervously pulled her blanket up to her face.
"Nyeh...c-can I help you guys?" she whimpered.
"I had the most wonderful dream because of your cookies, Himiko!" Angie chirped. "Everyone in the whole wide world became a follower of Atua, and was welcomed into his kingdom!"
"I had a dream that I finally went to space!" Kaito exclaimed. "And I became the world's best astronaut for discovering a lot of alien civilizations! Everyone voted for me to be president of Earth!"
"There's no way such a title exists," Maki said, shaking her head.
"Well, maybe not in real life, but that's how it was in my dream!" Kaito said. "But, anyways, what was your dream about, Maki Roll?" Everyone turned to Maki, curious to what kind of dream she had. She blushed.
"I'd...rather not talk about it," she grumbled. "It's too dumb."
"Just tell us already, Judge Moody!" Miu spat impatiently. Maki glared at her, then sighed.
"Fine..." she said. "I had a dream where I wasn't an orphan, and I had real, actual parents who loved me. And I was happy and nice to everyone, and I didn't have to worry about being an assassin and stealing peoples' lives." Everyone stared in stunned silence at her. Maki sighed gloomily. "See? I told you it was dumb."
"Geez, that's not dumb at all," Ryoma said. "Sounds similar to my dream, though, I would agree if you had said that wishing for it to happen would be dumb."
"What do you mean, Ryoma?" asked Tsumugi.
"It's pointless to dream or wish for something that will never come true," Ryoma explained. "Even though my dream was...surprisingly delightful, it also felt like a punch in the gut. Hmph...I don't know whether to call that dream a blessing, or a curse."
"What was your dream about?" Kaito asked.
"Well, I'll tell you, but it is depressing," Ryoma warned. "My girlfriend hadn't been killed, and I was back home with her and my cat. And I didn't even play tennis, I wasn't even an Ultimate student. I was a regular guy."
"That doesn't sound depressing at all!" Kaito said.
"But, the fact that it'll never come true is what makes it depressing," Ryoma said. "That's why I say, dreams like that are pointless. It's better to forget about the past and move on with your life"
"Bullshit!" Kaito exclaimed. "C'mon, man, stop whining about how depressing your life is! You say that wishing for the impossible is dumb and it was all in the past, or whatever, so why the hell are you still depressed? If you truly believed that you should move on, you should stop worryin' about the past and look to the future with bright hopes! That goes for you, too, Maki!"
"What? Why me?" Maki asked.
"It's true that you can't change the past, and maybe wishing for it to change is dumb," Kaito explained. "But, if you're still depressed about what happened in the past, it means you can't let go of what happened! You're not moving on! Moving on is accepting what happened, and doing whatever you can to make your life better! Instead of wishing to undo the past, wish for a brighter future! That goes for all of you!" The room fell silent as they stared at Kaito.
"So, anyway, my dream was about me actually becoming the characters that I cosplay!" Tsumugi said, breaking the silence.
"Hey! Don't just ignore my inspirational speech!" Kaito exclaimed angrily.
"It really wasn't all that inspiring," Tsumugi said, haughtily waving him off.
"Seriously! Nobody asked for your opinion, Mahatma Ghandeez Nuts!" Miu said to Kaito.
"W-What?! " Kaito exclaimed.
"Ha! In my dream, I was the world's best inventor!" Miu said grandly. "With my inventions, I was able to rid the world of starvation, war, violence, famine, and all that other bad shit! And everyone loved me! All the guys on the planet wanted to bang me, and my boobs grew a size bigger!"
"Um...can you not share your dreams?" Tsumugi said. "I feel like every time you speak, I want to do unspeakably horrible things to you."
"Shut the hell up, you four-eyed, lamebrain otaku! " Miu spat. "You're just jealous because you have two deflated balloons for chest!"
"Um...can Gonta share dream, now?" Gonta asked.
"Yes, Gonta, go ahead," Tsumugi replied, eager to not have to listen to Miu anymore.
"Gonta was king of bugs!" Gonta replied. "Everyone in world loved bugs, and loved King Gonta!"
"Tuh...that dream sounds stupid as shit!" Miu scoffed.
"Oh! G-Gonta sorry..." Gonta apologized with a hurt expression.
"You don't have to apologize to her, Gonta," Tsumugi said, glaring at Miu.
"You want someone to apologize to, apologize to all of us for wastin' our time!" Miu spat to Gonta.
"Hey! Cut it out, Miu! Stop yellin' at him!" Kaito yelled.
"Don't tell me what to do, Luke Skyfucker!" Miu shouted back.
"Stop callin' me names!" Kaito yelled back.
"H-Hey! Why everyone fighting?" Gonta asked. "Gonta not mean to start fight!"
"Leave it up to a degenerate male to start a fight!" Tenko growled, glaring at Gonta.
"If you guys don't stop fighting, Atua will unleash his holy wrath upon you all," Angie warned with a creepy grin.
"Nobody asked you, you kooky cult bitch!" Miu said, swatting at Angie. "All y'all are just jealous because my dream was better that yours!"
"Excuse me?!" Tsumugi cried.
"Yeah! Obviously mine was the best one!" Kaito exclaimed.
"You're plainly wrong! Mine was the best one!" Tsumugi said.
"No, it was mine!" Tenko shouted.
"Nuh-uuuhhhh...it was mi-iiiine," Angie said cheerfully.
"Um...Gonta thinks Gonta's was pretty good," Gonta said diplomatically.
"Sheesh...I can't believe everyone is getting so worked up over this," Ryoma said.
"Seriously. It's stupid to be fighting over something like this," Maki agreed.
"Well, I don't think it's stupid at all!" Tsumugi said.
"Yeah! In fact, I want another dream!" Miu said. Everyone turned to Himiko, who had been staring at them in horrified silence. "You better whip us up some more cookies, ya little midget, or else!"
"Well, um...you'll have to wait next weekend," Himiko replied in a small voice.
"I ain't waitin' that long!" Miu spat. "So, chop, chop! Get to makin' those damn cookies right now!"
"Nyeh, but...what about school?" Himiko asked.
"Himiko's right, we need to get ready for school," Maki said. But...I think I'd also like more of the cookies." Everyone turned to her in surprise.
"Wait...really, Maki?" Tsumugi asked.
"It was...a really good-tasting cookie...that's all," Maki mumbled, fiddling with one of her pigtails.
"Or is it because you liked your dream?" Angie teased. Maki frowned at her.
"Shut up," she said.
"I...agree with Maki," Ryoma said. "I want to see if I would have a different dream. One that's more...sensible."
"A dream that's...sensible? " Tsumugi repeated.
"Yeah...one that keeps me away from my past," Ryoma explained. "Do you think you can do that for me, Himiko?"
"Nyeh...okay," Himiko said. She knew exactly how to do just that.
Part Twelve
"What was all that ruckus about earlier, Monkey Buns?" Kokichi asked as he and Himiko walked together to school.
"Nyeh...just as I was hoping, my Snoozydoodles gave everyone dreams," Himiko replied. "But, when everyone that I gave them to was talking about their dreams, things got a little out of hand."
"Was that the effect of the magic?" Kokichi asked.
"Well, no...that was because Miu was being her usual, annoying self, and then Tsumugi said something, then Miu snapped back at her, then everything sorta erupted into chaos," Himiko explained.
"Didn't you say a while ago that the dream powder can be addictive?" Kokichi asked. Himiko sighed.
"Yeah...even small doses of the dream powder might cause someone to be addicted," she said. "But, it works really well, and that's why I wanted to put it in my cookies."
"Hmm...I hope you know what you're doing, Himiko," Kokichi said.
"Well...I have another idea where the dream powder might be not as addictive...but the effects will be just as good?" Himiko said with a bit of uncertainty. Then, she blushed. "I...used this method to dream about you before we started dating." Kokichi raised his eyebrows at her.
"Really?!" he exclaimed, grinning.
"Yeah...I had to steal your hair while you were asleep to do it, though," Himiko said quietly.
"Yeah, that's not creepy at all," Kokichi teased, wrapping his arm around Himiko's waist, and giving her a kiss on the cheek. A mischievous grin crossed his lips. "I wanna know what this other method is."
***
Friday night had arrived. Kokichi was with Himiko in her secret magic room. She was flipping through the spellbook titled, "Inside the Magical Mind." Himiko showed Kokichi the chapter "Build the Perfect Dream," specifically, the romance section.
"Nyeh...these are potions I used to have dreams about you," she explained to him, and pointed to the different dreams. "This is the 'sweet love dream' potion, the 'spicy love dream' potion, and the 'hot and steamy love dream' potion." Kokichi read the description of each dream, his impish grin growing larger across his face as he read.
"So, you drank all of those potions?" he asked, wiggling his eyebrows at her.
"Well, one night, I drank the first one, then the next night, I drank the second," Himiko said. "I secretly gave the last one to Miu, because I was too scared to drink it myself."
"Ugh! You gave it to Miu?! " Kokichi exclaimed in disgust.

"Well...I-I'd feel dirty having the last dream!" Himiko stammered.
"Well, then, why'd you make that potion in the first place?" Kokichi asked.
"Because I was curious!" Himiko said. "But, then my curiosity was replaced by fear and feeling dirty, so I gave it to Miu. It's a good thing I did, too, because..."
"Cuz, why...?" Kokichi asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Because she was doing very...dirty things with you," Himiko replied. "Yeah...we were having our monthly slumber party, and in the middle of it all, Miu was dreaming and...nyeh...screaming."
"AAAUUUUGGHHHH!!! GROSS!!" Kokichi exclaimed, covering his ears. "I don't wanna do it with her!! "
"Well, she did say that you said that to her in her dream," Himiko said. "But, you only did it to get her to shut up because she kept begging you."
"Ew, I don't care," Kokichi muttered. "There's no excuse to condone bestiality." Himiko sighed and gave Kokichi a playful swat. Kokichi laughed, then eyed her flirtatiously. "Besides, my body only belongs to you...Himiko." Himiko blushed and lowered her head. Every time he said her name like that, it got her heart pumping like crazy. "My body...is your body." Kokichi lifted her chin to turn her head to him. "Mi cuerpo...es su cuerpo, y mi corazón...es su corazón."
"Ohhhh...Kokichiiii...!" Himiko gurgled with delight, biting her lip. She didn't know Spanish, but he made it sound so good. Kokichi leaned in to give her a passionate kiss.
"Okay, that's enough!" he said, stopping the kiss abruptly.
"W-What?! Wait! No! Moooore...!" Himiko pouted, tugging on Kokichi's sleeve. "I want mooore."
"Nuh-uh, Monkey Buns. Tomorrow is another cookie sale, so we can't get distracted right now. We gotta make these cookies like Hiro...baked! " Kokichi said.
"O-kaaaayyy..." Himiko pouted.
"M'kay, so how are gonna do this, HimiCocoa Bean?" Kokichi asked.
"Well...what genre of potion should I make?" Himiko asked. "There's comedy, action-adventure, romance, horror, fantasy, mystery, aaannnd...lots of other stuff."
"Comedy!" Kokichi said. "Everyone needs a good laugh!"
"Nyeh...okay," Himiko said, then turned to the comedy section of the chapter.
"So, you'll just pour whatever potion you make into the cookie batter, right? And mix it up?" Kokichi asked.
"Yup, that's right," Himiko nodded.
"Aaaalrighty, then! Welp, do your thang, babe!" Kokichi said, kissing Himiko's cheek. Himiko giggled and read the comedy section:
~COMEDY:~
Laughter is the best medicine, as they say! So, why not have it in your dreams? After all, there's nothing cuter than someone laughing in their sleep! Whether you're in the mood for some gut-busting, slap-happy humor, wild, crazy humor, or even just simple, laughable jokes, every hilarious dream is welcome in clown town!
Slapstick comedy dream: A dream where tripping, punching, bashing, slapping, falling, and everything in between is considered more funny than horrifying! If you fancy a dream like that, give Slapstick comedy dream a whirl!
Boil water in small cauldron. Once water is boiled, add 1/2 cup of dream powder, 1 tsp of pepper for an extra kick, 1 tsp of cinnamon for an extra bite, 1 tsp of dragon spice for an extra punch, 3 petals of the Laffodil flower, and a 3/4 cup of sunlight for some lighthearted fun. Mix contents until water becomes a different color. Pour contents into a potion bottle. Add sleep powder before consuming. Drink and enjoy!
Fun-loving comedy dream: You can't always watch comedy, you have to experience it, too! If you feel like going on a funny, fun-filled adventure full of laughter, then the fun-loving comedy dream is just what you're looking for!
Boil water in small cauldron. Once water is boiled, add 1/2 cup of dream powder, 3/4 cup of elven sparkles for whimsy, 1 cup of pink polka dot pond water, 1 tsp of sugar, 5 petals of the Laffodil flower, and 3/4 cup of sunlight. Mix contents until water becomes a different color. Pour contents into a potion bottle. Add sleep powder before consuming. Drink and enjoy!
Joker dream: Want a dream with less gut busting, and more on the relaxed side? Then, a Joker dream is prefect the perfect comfort comedy dream for you!
Boil water in small cauldron. Once water is boiled, add 1/2 cup of dream powder, 1 tsp of funny honey, 1 petal of the Laffodil flower, a pinch of jesterly ginseng powder, and 3/4 cup of sunlight. Mix contents until water becomes a different color. Pour contents into a potion bottle. Add sleep powder before consuming. Drink and enjoy!
"Nyeh...which one should I pick?" Himiko asked. Kokichi scanned the page.
"Hmm...why not all of them?" he suggested. "You can make three batches of cookies, and pour the different potions into each one! Actually, it's way more interesting that way, since people will get to randomly choose their comedy dream cookies!"
"I guess you're right," Himiko said. She got to work, whipping up all three potions. "Nyeh...all done!"
"Do you wanna go to D.I.C.E. headquarters and bake them there again?" Kokichi asked.
"Yeah, but...let's take the short way," Himiko said. "I'm already tired from making these potions." Before Kokichi could ask what she meant, Himiko snapped her fingers, and they magically appeared at the abandoned insane asylum serving as D.I.C.E. headquarters.
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2024.05.16 20:06 Tight-Target-2065 Is my crush on my coworker mutual?

I (24F) met my crush (25M) at work. At first he seemed like a goof and while I found him funny, didn't think twice about him. But since we've been working closer at work I started catching feelings. We've hung out as friends a number of times, every time enjoyable. We can joke and gossip and be raunchy together but also get very deep and real about our lives and past relationships.
So far we've gone to a bar just the two of us a few times, agreed to go dancing once but I had an overwhelming week so I cancelled, then went to the movies and drinks after. My best friend jokes that the movie hangout was a date because he picked me up and paid for the movie, but I paid for dinner and also believe it's not a date unless you call it one. People who are just friends can go to the movies.
Anyway, this crush has been really rough because I fear rejection and how things will affect work. Sometimes I think our chemistry is so good there's no way he's not interested, but then he takes forever to text me back and I feel stupid for ever thinking I stood a chance.
Sometimes I'm bad at knowing when I'm being flirted with. The closest to flirting from I can think of is when he complimented my skirt in a way that referenced a style of clothing I know for sure he finds sexy (being vague on purpose.) Two coworkers were convinced we were dating, which makes me think it's not all in my head.
Should I start moving on from him or do I have a shot?
TLDR: I can't tell if my coworker likes me back romantically or he just wants to stay friends.
submitted by Tight-Target-2065 to Crushes [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 18:58 AnalystShort1331 25 M Looking for new friendos! Bonus points if you are into anime or you are a gamer!

Yo! First I want to say thank you for taking the time to read my post. I’m still searching for a few more people to talk to regularly, so I thought I’d try another shot to find some decent people.
Anyways about me:
So a little bit about me. Im 25 M and I live in the US. I’m pretty chill and easy going for the most part. I love joking around a lot, so don’t take me seriously most times haha 😅. I like to think that I’m a good listener, or at least i try my best to be. I’m pretty decent at holding conversations too, I can talk about a wide variety of stuff, and I’m not opposed to even talking about more difficult topics, as long as it is civil. I’m go with the flow pretty much, and the energy I get from you I’ll give back in return.
I’m introverted and a homebody, my ideal way of relaxing is wrapped up in a blanket watching a good Netflix series 😌, or just kicking back with some friends playing some games.
I spend a lot of my free time gaming lately. I mostly play Apex whenever I game but I also own some other games too. Recently tho, I have really been getting into Fortnite. I’m usually the one late asf to trends and stuff (it was the same with Squid Games, didn’t watch that until 2-3 years later lmfao 🤣) but it’s hella fun, and I wish I would have tried it sooner. I have both a PlayStation and a Switch and I’m open to suggestions if you ever had another game you wanted to try playing. Feel free to ask me what games I own btw. I enjoy board games and card games too. I used to play Magic the gathering in High school, but it’s been years since I played.
I enjoy listening to music. I listen to a little bit of everything. I like watching tv shows and movies on Netflix, and I’m a huge anime fan! I have more nerdy hobbies overall 😅 and I really enjoy science related topics, i like learning in general tbh. I enjoy playing card and board games, domino’s, ect, and I’m semi decent in chess too. I like reading every now and then, and I love a good story. I love memes and funny/interesting videos, so definitely feel free to share memes whenever you find them, and I definitely will do the same.
I have some hobbies that I pick up and fall off of. A few of those are learning French, learning the guitar, learning to code, draw ect. Consistency is my mortal enemy 😈 lmfao 🤣. I have been picking up the guitar a bit more lately and currently trying to teach myself new techniques on there.
Long term wise, I prefer to keep talking on discord after talking on Reddit for a bit. I also would like it if in the long term you’re comfortable with voice chats. I’m cool with just chatting, but long term it would be better if we could call every now and then. Also, it would be good if we could do virtual hangouts from time to time. Maybe play some games, vibe out to some music, watch some shows/movies/anime together.
During weekdays, chats are usually better for me because I work, but like I said above when I’m off work definitely would love voice calls. And during the weekends when I’m free, I’m definitely down to hang out as well! Bonus points if you are a fellow anime fan or a gamer! I’ve been looking for more to game with and watch anime with specifically. Also, if you have recommendations, please run them my way because my well is dryyyyyyyy, almost as dry as my DM’s lmao 💀💀
Hopefully something in my post appealed to you. If it did, don’t be shy, even if we don’t have the same hobbies it would still be nice to have more consistent friends to talk to. I can hold pretty decent convos, and can talk about a variety of stuff. So don’t be shy, feel free to say Hi! 😁👋
submitted by AnalystShort1331 to lonely [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 18:57 Ice666White Field Report: Game Edmonton

Field report from community member of Game Edmonton.

Friday:
Showed up like 2 hours before Greta closed. I cut the line as usual. Funnily these two 10s (blonde and brunette) approached me to cut the line and then I flirted with them both, joked about how I basically did the same thing and how we're exactly the same 😏. Talked seductively with the brunette. They're loving my vibe. They gave me an alco cooler but I gave it to some other dudes who were nearby and started hyping him up when he was shot gunning. Those dudes were then hitting on them, but I paid 0 attention to them and brunette opened me again and then we went into the bar, I threw in a flying kiss to the brunette who kept eying me and left them. They were on their way to meet their friends.
Later, opened this pinoy chick who was by herself, she was like a 7 in looks. Her friends seem to have ditched her but this girl is like a replica of that Ukrainian chick 2 weeks ago. This time I left her the moment she didn't respond to my lead. It's funny tho since they are dtg to diff spots of the bar and the dance floor but they stay put there like a rock afterwards. Girl kept eying me after I left her to talk to some groups of chicks. I wished her a complimentary bye at the end of the night.
Opened this one good looking black chick and her okay looking friend- I whispered smth seductive in both their ears hinting at a threesome. Black chick was pretty DTF, but her friend was not liking my vibe and ended up being a cockblock. YET THEY still trying to close the gap with me at the dance floor. I tried dancing again but the bitch keeps on bitching. 🤷🏽‍♂ They were playing hard at the end of the night- just ignored them completely.
I met the blonde and brunette's group from the line now. Brunette went home early. Blonde is now introducing me to all her girl friends so like 4 girls are talking to me at the same time (told them to stop talking at the same time coz I can't hear lol), and their male best friend is just sitting and sulking in the corner like a lil bitch. I tried being friendly with him but I'm not gonna be a doormat. He tried to later cockblock me at the dance floor by blocking my view from the girls. Couldn't pull because I thought the blonde was already talking to another male friend she seemed obsessed about. But later she kept reopening me so many times (even at the dance floor) saying "I love so much" when I barely gave her any attention lol. She's still liking all my ig posts and stories lol.
My new wingman Decentralized joined and we had a fun time talking to girls outside the club and I tried pulling another blonde but she was living very far. Group of black dudes were hitting on her and her friends, but I kept persisting and basically AMOGed those dudes and we are at the donair shop now, but settled for their IG because they lived far and were a tad bit drunk for my taste. Spam messaged myself from the blonde's friend's phone who was another blonde. My wingman was near me throughout after the bar closed so it did help in talking throughout to maintain state.
Overall great night- 6 solid ig closes- three 10s, one 9 and one 8, one 7.

Saturday:
Showed up like 45 min before O'Byrne's closed. Lot of quick interactions with women. Only reason I'm not rusty is because I've been approaching a min. of one girl since the last 50 days. Highlights were this one set with a blonde (10) and a brunette (8) - the blonde stole my cheap shades lol and the brunette seemed more interested in me, but couldn't pull. I didn't spend enough time with them to form any solid connection. Another set - where I knew this girl but she keeps playing around when I try to make solid plans to meet, she introduced her friend but I kept breaking rapport with both of them. They actually loved it but I left the set to talk to more attractive girls. That girl seems to be a bit flaky and I feel like she's a time sink. Until she hits me up on socials, I'm not gonna waste any time pursuing this girl who I tried since last August.
Third set was after the bar closed- two girls (blonde 9, brunette 8). They were down to go to a After hours club but I tried to test how compliant they were by first going to the donair place nearby to share food. I was hungry. Blonde was down but her friend who's the mom of the group and also a single mom was hesitant. By that point, I knew they were trying to just make me pay for our Uber to the afterhours venue. They also said they don't have ig when I tried to ig close them. Why would these girls still stay in set talking to me when they were rejecting guys who hit on them while we're in set? Anyway I seemed confused at this point so I purposely acted wishy-washy and uncalibrated in terms of being decisive and then instantly left once the brunette girl gave a more definite No. Honestly could have still got them an Uber prolly looking back but idc. Interaction lasted like 5-8 min.
No ig closes.

Things I did well:
  • Approaching hotties 10s esp. who are in groups is like piece of cake for me now.
  • I've been sticking in sets longer than I previously used to, but I need to do it even more. I seem clueless when a girl withdraws attention from me, but is still into me?

Things I need to work on:
  • Going for the kiss. My plan is to kiss someone once we're isolated but again I'm with a group. I'll remember to ask if they're bi next time.
  • Staying in sets longer for the pull. I can't think of anything to pull group of girls to my place except my DJing but I keep forgetting to mention that I DJ. They find out on IG eventually.
  • Coming to bars/clubs a bit early. Get into flow state and so I can reapproach girls again after other dudes eventually bore them out.
submitted by Ice666White to GameGlobal [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 18:51 ParticularlyAvocado The Batman Reviewed: Season 1 - 2

1. The Bat in the Belfry - 3/5 (In terms of a Batman introduction episode, this does a decent job. It skips the origin story because superhero cartoons are allergic to them for some reason. But this at least vaguely alludes to Bruce's parents being gone, on top of introducing the struggle of being both a famous playboy and the Batman. As a result, the story is fairly generic though. Joker wants to release a laughing gas across Gotham. Gee, I haven't seen that one a dozen times. That said, this iteration of Joker has a really unique and wacky design. Along with zany acrobatic moves that are fun to watch and a great performance from Kevin Michael Richardson, it more than makes up for the subpar story. I also liked the side focus on Bennett and Fa Mulan- Sorry, Detective Yin. They're fun characters.)
2. Call of the Cobblepot - 3/5 (Penguin is quite acrobatic for a pudgy little guy. Alongside Rupert Thorne doing parkour in the previous episode, it seems the show wants to sell me on the idea that these chubby guys are just as combat capable as the Batman. And did they really have to give him the Danny DeVito hands? That's not a mandate anymore! I liked Alfred getting involved in this episode, though he doesn't really do much besides go to the Cobblepot manor. But it's funny that he does so in search of a tray.)
3. Traction - 4/5 (Colorful iteration of Bane. Why is his skin all red? He looks like a monster. But it's a cool twist on the character, so whatever. Although his motivations don't match up to the rad design, since after getting paid to destroy the Batman, all he wants to do is "take over Gotham", which he apparently thinks will be accomplished by just wreaking havoc. What is this, The Spectacular Spider-Man? I did like Alfred having to come and rescue Bruce, and the cute flashback where Alfred comforts him.)
4. The Cat and the Bat - 3/5 (This one's good, but mostly for the action setpieces. I think the rugged artstyle lends itself very well to snappy action, particularly the final scene with the Batman and Catwoman against the Yakuza. And the stuff before with Batman having to catch up to Selina messing with his Batmobile controls was neat too. But I can't say Catwoman leaves much of an impression on me in this one.)
5. The Man Who Would Be Bat - 4/5 (Kirk Langstrom as a character works pretty well as a kooky old man. I liked the visuals for his echolocation. As for the actual story...I mean it's just a typical Man-Bat story. Langstrom becomes the Man-Bat and goes crazy, so Batman stops him. But I did like the larger inclusion of Bennett and Yin, as I like their additions in this show as foils-yet-vaguely-allies to Batman.)
6. The Big Chill - 3/5 (So in this show Mr. Freeze is just another generic jewel thief. Not that I want this series to just copy paste Batman: The Animated Series, but simplifying the villains like this makes it less compelling by default. In fact here, he was always a criminal, he just happened to get ice powers. That said, his design is actually quite rad, and I did like the addition that he has a vendetta against the Batman. Plus it's funny that he took revenge on a random hobo, just for being in his way a few years ago.)
7. The Big Heat - 4/5 (Gee, I bet the writers thought they were hilarious putting these two titles next to each other. I'd say what this episode does slightly better than the others is showing the "struggle" of balancing the Bruce life with the Batman life. And actually giving the villain a narrative connection to it, instead of his schemes just serving as a vague lesson to learn. Firefly himself had a pretty cool looking suit, and the sky action was pretty nifty. Plus it was cathartic when Batman took him down to ground level and stomped. Nitpick: They forgot to animate Batman's mouth in the reflection of the puddle. I hope somebody got fired for that blunder.)
8. Q&A - 4/5 (Bruce listening to hiphop in his earbuds at a classical music theatre... Yeah this sure is a unique Batman. This is the first episode where I was genuinely interested in the story and villain. For starters, since they didn't immediately show me who it was, I got to remain curious about the kidnappings. Then I appreciated that they were connected to a personal vendetta rather than just wanting to steal jewels. I think Batman discovered the mystery a bit too quickly though. He didn't research the victims connections, he just clicked a button and the Batwave did it for him. But I enjoyed Cluemaster. Funny design. He's HUGE. I chuckled at Batman casually walking into his his moms house and her thinking she's his friend. And I thought it was fun how he defeated Cluemaster by asking the Batman's identity. Side note, that is an enormous basement.)
9. The Big Dummy - 4/5 (Wow, it's Homer Simpson! Well actually, Scarface sounds more like Krusty the Clown when he's yelling. That aside, we're back to villains just wanting to steal stuff for profit. Yeah, sure, whatever. Scarface trying to slap Batman was funny, though. And I found the idea of making him a huge puppet where Wesker himself takes the puppet position by the giant arm a funny twist on the character. The vague subplot about Bruce having a date with some Becky chick feels kind of tacked on and unnecessary, but I digress.)
10. Topsy Turvy - 4/5 (First "villain comes back for revenge" episode. Joker's plan is unfortunately fairly generic, but his zaniness still makes it fun. Not to mention seeing the Batman locked in an Arkham cell and dressing up as Joker. Why did Batman lock in the guard when leaving though? Rude for no reason. Also, I'm glad the fake Joker in this episode had to stay quiet so he won't be found out, unlike in The New Batman Adventures where a goon dressed up as Joker can just perfectly imitate his voice.)
11. Bird of Prey - 4/5 (Okay, I'm just gonna say it: Stop showing front facing Alfred! Without that little patch of visible hair, he looks completely bald, and it's weird! That aside, I guess after the series of villain introduction episodes, it's time for a batch of sequels. This is the better sequel than the Joker one, since I liked that Penguin had a clear cut motive. And I can't believe I'm saying this, but Penguin's zaniness was more amusing. No doubt helped by Tom Kenny's performance. Him wreaking havoc around Wayne Manor and harassing Alfred was just funny. And it made Alfred hitting him with a chair in the end better. I thought his rooftop battle with the Batman was pretty creative, and I liked that Alfred dressed up as Batman to fool the journalist. Also how he intentionally kicked their video tape into the fire.)
12/13. The Rubber Face of Comedy/The Clayface of Tragedy - 4/5 (The cops literally have Joker at gunpoint but they let him proceed with his slow getaway. I'm starting to understand why Batman keeps one-upping them. Great two-parter though, but part 1 is really nothing but setup for the real meat which is part 2. Part 1 is just about Joker causing chaos again, except the tone is more dramatic on account of this being meant to be more serious than the average episode. And while Joker's antics are fun, given how little it had to do with part 2 other than him being the cause for Bennett becoming Clayface, they didn't really need to spend a WHOLE episode for just that setup. It results in part 1 being just good, while part 2 is fantastic. Sadly, combined, I can't give them 5/5. But part 2 gets that honorary score for itself. You could have cut Joker's generic havoc-wreaking in half and have the Clayface transformation start around the 10 minute mark of part 1, leaving you with about 30 minutes to develop it further. But then they couldn't have that cliffhanger, now could they?
As for the actual story... Depressing. I'd say it's a bit early to change the status quo of Bennett since while he is a good character, we haven't really seen MUCH of him, so it's not a huge blow to suddenly make him a villain. But it's a pretty good, genuinely saddening twist regardless. And while the emotional moments feel a little hurried (hence why you could have cut some Joker nonsense) I think they're effective enough. Yin crying, etc. And Bennett's transformation itself is genuinely horrifying stuff, so you really feel the fear he must be going through.)
14. The Cat, the Bat, and the Very Ugly - 3/5 (And now we're on villain team-up episodes. Except they're still just generic stories about them wanting to steal stuff! Well, okay, I guess Penguin DOES want to use the relics to... I don't know, blow stuff up? It just isn't very riveting is all. I do find Batman and Catwoman being stuck to each other interesting in theory, but they don't really do much fun with it. And why did Batman lie to Yin about it? I guess he's worried he'll look suspicious if he's with Catwoman, but also, he could have just told the truth? The lie just incriminated him more. I also question this because the episode ends with Yin TRUSTING Batman, which makes no sense if she literally caught him in a lie the FIRST time she called him about a case.)
15. Riddled - 3/5 (That's certainly a unique version of Riddler. I respect it, simply because it's fun that the show dares to completely revamp characters like this. But the episode itself is mostly just decent. Yin and Bats going across town solvring riddles is mildly fun, but the actual confrontation with Riddler is just okay. I did like the 20 questions game, but couldn't Batman easily get out of that by not answering? I found it funny how dense the Police Chief was to understand even the simplest riddles, especially with how bluntly Yin had to explain the last one. Side note: Riddler uses the term "brainiac" in this. But that term exists because of the Superman character. So has a Brianiac attack on Metropolis happened here and been made publicly known or what?)
16. Fire & Ice - 4/5 (Gee, with a title like that, I sure was scratching my head wondering which two villains it could be about. I'd say while this episode is good, it felt a bit thinly set up as nothing but "what if ice villain with fire villain??". I did find it amusing that they turned on each other near the end and the conflict just became Heat vs. Cold. That scene with Yin yapping about knowing Bruce's secret though... Give me a break. Even if they WERE gonna have her find out his secret identity, that's most certainly saved for a Serious:tm: season finale or something with heavy stakes, not a random Firefly episode.)
17. The Laughing Bat - 4/5 (Golden concept for an episode. Joker trying to imitate the Batman is unhinged and hilarious. And Penguin being caught in the crossfire completely discombobulated by the switcheroo was great. Praise aside, I was a little disappointed that Batman turning into Joker didn't go further than...he can't stop laughing. Couldn't have Joker-ified him any more? White skin? ANYTHING else to have him also vaguely look the part? Overall I also felt there was too much focus on Bruce laughing as opposed to Joker being the Batman, when that was the best part.)
18. Swamped - 3/5 (While I appreciate that this is a villain introduction episode that goes beyond them being a jewel thief", Croc wasn't too interesting. He wants to flood Gotham because he likes water, but then Batman stops him. Although I liked the way he did it by forcing him to stay in water. :ohgood: Also neat that this episode introduces the Batcave "museum". This series gradually introducing all of these iconic aspects of Batman lore as opposed to having it all pre-established is fun.)
19. Pets - 4/5 (Season 2 really IS the season of villain team-ups. I was rolling my eyes at the prospect of another generic Penguin episode of him wanting to steal stuff, but got my excitement back up when they showed Langstrom. Although they could have devoted some more time to Langstrom actually being aware of Penguin's scheme and wanting out instead of just... One. And overall, it IS just another episode where Penguin tries to steal stuff, so yeah.)
20. Meltdown - 4/5 (Wow, this was JUST like the Batman Beyond episode "Meltdown". While a good episode, I have to say the Bennett-Clayface conflict feels a bit forced at times. Him repeatedly getting into encounters with Joker, the very man who caused him to become Clayface, and struggling with not morphing to take his rightful revenge? Valid. Understandable. But him randomly being willing to kill Batman and become an outlaw on a whim? I don't know. His fight scene against Joker on stilts was pretty fun though. That said, Bennett is a good guy and all that, so I'm hopeful for a redemption arc where in the end he becomes a superhero with his powers.)
21. JTV - 4/5 (It's another Joker shenanigans episode. What is there to say? Not that that's a bad thing, since Joker shenanigans ARE fun. He concocts some nutty TV show-themed scheme, and then Batman stops him. Cash was a bit of an annoying inclusion though. Did he even serve any narrative purpose? I guess he vaguely emphasizes how well Yin and Batman work together, by him working badly with her. I did like the "animated" JTV promo. But who even made that? I guess one of Joker's henchmen can animate.)
22. Ragdolls to Riches - 4/5 (Oh boy, the umpteenth episode about a villain stealing some jewels. Wait, it's TWO villains this time. Wow, this changes everything! Jokes aside, it actually kind of does, because Ragdoll is entertaining enough on his own. His costume is cool and unique in its simplicity, and his distorting body leads to some very expressive movements and action which make for a fun watch. And if that wasn't enough, his rivarly with Catwoman and repeatedly trolling her on purpose was pretty darn amusing. Though despite being the titular character, the episode is mostly about the Bruce/Batman/Selina/Catwoman mystery. It is fun seeing the "4" of them interact and not realize who the other is. Especially when Batman, the world's greatest detective, believes Selina's blatant charity scam and hands her a huge check. It's funny seeing Bruce be this oblivious.)
23. The Butler Did It - 3/5 (Another flipping jewel thievery episode! At least there's a mystery element to it this time, in that you initially don't know who the villain is. And when you do find out it's Spellbinder, there's the twist that he swaps his mind control targets from butlers to their employers. And it was really fun to see Alfred be the one to figure this out and escape the room he put himself in to save Batman's ass. I liked the bit where Batman hesitated to punch Alfred. And I think some of the hallucinations were fairly creative. That said, it was still a jewel thievery episode! Get some new plots, show.)
24. Grundy's Night - 4/5 (While I did have thoughts on this version of Grundy, those feel irrelevant when it turns out he was just Clayface in disguise anyway. That said, props for making a twist I could genuinely not predict. However, the reason I couldn't have predicted this is because after all that development of Bennett and his descent into Clayface, I wouldn't have expected his next appearance to just be him doing something generically villainous that Batman must put a stop to. It comes off as a bit awkward, because you'd think this would be more emotionally significant considering he was Bruce's best friend. But not only do we not even see his Bennett form in this episode, Batman doesn't even refer to him as such, just "Clayface". And then he goes home all cheery as if he stopped any ol' twerp. Huh?)
25. Strange Minds - 4/5 (While this episode falls into "Joker shenanigans" territory again, at least the focus here is less about just stopping him and instead delving into his mind. It leads to the zaniness being cranked up more, which is fun to see especially with how expressive Joker is in this show. Although I feel like they could have been a bit more creative with the visuals. I liked the flying fish, Joker as the moon, and the normal Joker managing the idea vault. But other than that it doesn't get more wacky then just a crowd of Jokers. But I liked the solution of how Batman made him disclose the information by making him think they had exited his mind. Cliché, but clever. It's a bit weird how Hugo Strange spots Batman in Joker's mind and immediately assumes it's the actual guy, though. For all he knows that could have been mentally conjured up by Joker. Batman would likely be on his mind a lot. Also, Harley Yin.)
26. Night and the City - 4/5 (Woah, TRIPLE villain teamup? Daring today, are we? I liked that Penguin didn't even know who Riddler was. And despite that, he's clearly stomping both Penguin and Joker in this contest. He came up with the idea to catch Batman in the first place, had the most elaborate bat-bait AND was the last guy standing in a fight against him. Joker and Penguin just followed Batman and quickly fumbled. I guess with Commissioner Gordon and the Bat-Signal being introduced in this episode that this marks the end of Batman being an enemy of the GCPD. Not that I mind, since while I liked the development of it, with Bennett gone and Yin already on his side, there wasn't a lot further you could push it. It's a shame this is Yin's last appearance, though. I don't really understand why, since while she's fired in this episode (for like what, a few hours?), she gets the job back and everything goes back to normal. Frankly it would have been more interesting if she WAS fired and then became a vigilante herself/sidekick to Batman as referenced in this very episode.)
Movie: The Batman vs. Dracula - 3/5 (Starting the story with Joker and Penguin? Yeah, this is a The Batman movie alright. They really can't help but spam these two villains. That said, decent movie, but I'm really scratching my head as to why they thought Dracula was the ultimate villain they could utilize for it. There is some thematic connection with him being able to transform into a bat, obviously... But that's as deep as it goes. And the few bits of Bruce recalling the death of his parents was like, come on, you really felt a need to rely on that as a plotpoint in a movie about Dracula?
The film, much like the show, is fairly barebones. Dracula rises and wants to take over Gotham, so Batman must stop him. The side story of Bruce having a romance with Vickly Vale feels very tacked on and pointless since not only was she not much of an interesting character, just a dime a dozen love interest, but she doesn't even appear in the series going forward. So, what? Also, did Bruce really need to hastily steal someone's lipstick and a platter to write "Alucard" and mirror it to figure out it spells Dracula backwards? Just rearrange the letters in your head.
The most interesting thing about the movie is it gets slightly more visually grim. Stuff Penguin bleeding in the beginning alone was a surprise, as tame as it was, because that's not something I would have thought the censors would allow. Of course I quickly realized it was plot relevant, but then they immediately go on to show Dracula "killing" a guy. Which, while I know having finished the movie that he was cured, the way the scene initially portrays it is obviously supposed to make you think that's what happened. There's also Joker practically bathing in blood and Dracula literally being burned alive in the end. Sheesh. So much for Batman's code. Vampire Joker is probably the best part of this movie. That blood bank scene is really cursed [good thing], and KMR's performance of Joker starving while Batman has him locked up was great. I mean Batman having to feed Joker his own blood just so he doesn't starve is a fairly unique plotpoint. Also his reaction to being un-vampire'd is pretty funny. "Where's Dracula?" "I'm looking at him".)
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2024.05.16 18:41 clarkdahmer The "Joker's going home next month" conversation

I know someone else has made an analysis on the Valentine’s event, but I’d like to add the “Joker’s going home next month conversation” to it. (Well, I wanted to bring it up again and share my view on it, mostly because every time I get to the event, I think about how well her date is written and the dialogue choices Joker’s given for the he’s going home next month talk with her versus the choices he’s give with the other girls, which to me, they made it obvious that the writers love her. This is NOT a stab at you know who or the other characters, they did ribbon girl kind of dirty... + I have a lot of time on my hands right now.)
As we know in the Vanilla version, Makoto’s the only one Joker is direct with when it’s mentioned he’s going home next month. With the others, he either asks them if they want to come along as a question or as a joke. I was curious to see how it changed in Royal. (I watched a compilation of the other valentine’s and the first dialogue option was mostly chosen, well, except for Sumire. Non-thieves don’t matter much because they aren’t in the other games, so I'm not going to say much about them, you’re free to ship them though, that’s just my opinion.)
The Royal Version:
Ohya: “Sorry it’s so sudden.” or “I’ll visit when I can.” (I don’t care for her much, I only do her SL to see Lala! Lala is cool as shit and she ships him and Makoto.)
Takemi: “Will you miss me?” or “I’ll visit as soon as I can.” (I like Takemi, don’t get me wrong, but damn her date was done awful, besides I like to ship her with Sae.)
Kawakami: “I’ll see you again soon” or “I’m not your student now.” (👀)
Hifumi: “Sorry for the sudden news.” or “Want to tag along?” (It would have been strange to see her as a thief, in a good way, of course, but it’s better she isn’t. ((Her SL does come in handy.)) Also, I’ve seen people bring this up before, Hifumi was never going to be a thief, the development team said it themselves.)
Chihaya: “Sorry it’s so sudden.” or “I’ll come see you.” (alright!)
Futaba: “Will you miss me?” or “I don’t want us to be apart.” (I don’t ship these two, mostly because their dynamic throughout the game feels more like siblings to me, + there’s no romantic scenes or anything along those lines given to them. He’s a big brother to her and she’s a gremlin of a little sister. Plus Sojiro would probably whoop Joker...)
Ann: “Will you miss me?” or “Time for long distance.” (Damn Atlus… he didn’t get an option to ask if she wanted to come along with him. Well, you could see it more as a “we’ll still be together!” sort of thing, but considering how the lover’s arcana is usually pushed the most, P3 and P4 for example, you’d think it’d be the case in P5 and treat her like the past ones… Nope, it’s the priestess. They made it seem like it during Kamoshida's palace she's the one but as time went on, they weren't fucking with Ann AT ALL. I love Ann, but she treats Joker like a close friend and she doesn't show interest in him. Her interest goes to two other people.)
Sumire: “It might get lonely” or “Want to come with?” (it’s funny because he’s like it MIGHT get lonely and he doesn’t ask if she’ll miss him. If you pick “Want to come with?” she doesn’t take it seriously and laughs it off. As mentioned by u/VerbingWeirdsLang, she gets Makoto’s old lines from Vanilla, which is laughable because of how much they hyped her up and pushed her. You would think they’d write something good for her, NO! Just recycled shit! they did her dirty.)
Haru: “Will you miss me?” or “Are you mad?” (same with Ann, he doesn’t get the option to say “want to tag along?” or something like that. She doesn’t feel like a phantom thief due to the lack of screen time, so she’s just there. I saw someone say she’s a damsel in distress and yeah, I have to agree ((her SL, mostly and even during the story itself.)) Also, the fact he asks if she’s mad is funny because she can be a tad scary sometimes.)
Makoto: “Will you miss me?” or “Come with me.” (I like the response she has to “Come with me.” she says “Sure, let me get my tickets… I wish.” and the conversation after that. Out of all the thieves, I don’t know if you would consider Sumire to be a phantom thief considering what she’s said about them in the past and her only doing one palace… But continuing on, she’s still the only one Joker can directly tell “Come with me.” Her entire arc and the conversations she has with Joker, and of course, the romantic events are mature and well written. I don’t know if I could be convinced that Makoto isn’t the main love interest/canon even with Sumire being added. Makoto helped the story progress, she doesn’t feel forced and their interactions feel natural and they don’t leave you feeling weirded out. But come on!! Even her English VA ships them.)
Does this need a conclusion? I don’t know! You’re free to have your opinion on it.
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2024.05.16 17:56 Plastic_Finish1968 The Long Walk Home: chapter 10 (Tall Dark and Extraterrestrial)

Have you ever witnessed the first formation of life? I mean, I've seen my children, I was there for every step of the process if you know what I mean. Hah. But what I'm talking about is from beyond the beginning. The molten slag of a planet forming over millions or even billions of years into a habitable plane. Have you seen, from that very point, chemicals coalescing and reproducing? Amino acids and the forming proteins?
Well today, I found out, when you die in the crypts, you don't see a light in the end of a tunnel. You witness something truly beautiful and pointless.
I watched the birth of life from nothing. Short molecular protein chains. No cell walls, no encasing membranes. If DNA or genetic code of any kind was in their descendant's future, it wasn't present now. I watched it cling to the surface of rock, self-replication fueled by the warm free energy of a sun, millions of generations, hard work, decay, and new growth, only to be destroyed by a crashing wave. The weak hydrogen bonds were broken, as simple as that. The ancestor's hard work gone in a single blink-and-you-miss-it moment. Somehow I knew, wherever this was, that was all the life that planet would ever see until it was swallowed up by its star.
It was a quick fleeting spark. All the dramas and soap operas in the world could have taken place in a single raindrop. A unique potential, unlike any others, this planet's chosen ones, snuffed out before it could evolve to breathe its first breath. Rather grim isn't it? I don't know why I dreamt it, but there it was, a pointless creation followed by an equally pointless destruction. I guess it was a nice commercial break from the missing-arm-induced pain i was suffering. A wonderful hilucination, if a bit mocob.
Anyway, back to my unimaginable blood-curdling, mind-wrenching torture porn session. My eyes were closed a very long time, but when they did open, I was finally where I should be. Horizontal in a hospital bed, surrounded by trained surgeons. That said, it was on an alien world, and the surgeons were not trained in human biology. What's worse, they had no way to dull the pain.
Death would have been a blessing, unfortunately, the doctors were good, in spite of the unknown make, model, and engine size laying before them. 5 hours under an experimental knife, and I think an arc welder, is what it took to reattach my arm and fix my internal organ damage. 5 hours of poking and prodding and searing and stitching and pulling and zapping. All things considered, I am impressed it only took 5 hours. Ted's species was remarkable when it came to taking in new information and applying it in the real world. All their extra brains probably didn't hurt either.
If you remember, Ted's species came equipped with five extremity brains, and a central one. That's three for all three of his legs, two for both of his arms, and one in his central body. Ted would have had six individual minds within him before I found him dead in a ditch beside that interstellar sidewalk. By that point, only one, Ted, had survived.
After my, let's say, unique experience, I was left alone in a dark room to rest. Ted came by to visit. Oh yeah, he had a body now. He wore that "Tall, dark, and extraterrestrial" look well. He was easily 7 feet tall in his real body. Those Ted-fu moves should pack a real punch in a body like that.
"That reminds me. You wanted your fighting moves back, right?" My voice was terribly parched after my morning shouting sessions.
Shouting obscenities at medical proffesionals was about all I could do when Ted's doctors were busy inventing a new form of torture. Seriously, take notes. Good stuff in there.
"Keep them. That isn't going to be my concern here. It's hard to even walk now, let alone fight." He admitted. "I'm used to having secondary brains do all the work. I would only take over when the situation required. Now, I'm all I've got."
"Just another one of us handicap one-brainers," I taunted. "How does it feel to be on my level? Could you say you're just 'too single-minded?"
He laughed. I don't think I've ever heard Ted lower himself to laughing at one of my jokes. It wasn't even a good one. I know I could have come up with something better. Hold on. I- huh... well, I guess the moment has passed.
Instead, I teased him again. "so, you have a sense of humor after all."
"Always have. You just aren't funny." He shot back.
Then it was my turn to laugh at a bad joke.
"Bad idea!" I realized aloud. "Laughing hurts. Don't make me laugh."
There was an awkward silence before Ted finally spoke again. Our whole conversation was full of them.
"You're going back there aren't you?" He asked.
"I have to. I have a family somewhere, and I have to know if they're still alive. Something bad is happening on earth and I just want to be there to protect them."
"I don't think you ever will find out."
"Blunt and to the point today are ya?"
"Always have been. You just never listen. Im serious. I dont think you'll make it home."
There it was again, that quiet that kept creeping back up into our conversation.
"What if you run into Brad again?" He asked. "I won't be there to reboot your brain next time. You will either die or-"
"Don't tell me."
"Or you will suffer greatly, then die." He continued while checking his version of fingernails.
"I told you not to tell me. Now I can choose which option I like better."
"I'm being serious." He shot back at me. "You have no defenses against him."
"I know. I'm hoping he's dead. That's three shots from a Tedidian gun he has taken now."
Neither of us were convinced.
"Tedidian? That's the name you gave my species? I'm honored."
"I'm the first of my kind here, I get the naming privileges."
If our conversation took place over the radio, the host would be mortified. Not by the subject matter, no. The silence would be dubbed "dead air" and the host would desperately clamor for a new topic to keep the dialogue active and dynamic. We didn't have that luxury. I think Ted was sorry he couldn't have done more to help, but he would never admit it. I actually might miss him after all- Nah... Too stuck up his own butt to admit his shortcomings. I dont need a guy like that tagging along.
"Do you- mourn the loss of your secondary minds? Were they separate thinking entities?"
"I mourned their loss eons ago. I have moved on. Now I have to re-remember how to walk and talk and do math equations without them. I will be slower than my academic peers, but I have with me knowledge of the unknowable. That should make up for some of my deficiencies."
Eventually, Ted was ushered out. I needed the rest. The doctors here were good. They had managed to piece together this broken puzzle written with a completely different alphabet, and accelerated my healing a great deal. Not really a surprise, given they could build Ted a whole new body. I was back on my feet in a matter of 2 days, using my arm in 3, and back to 70% at 4. I dont think I'll ever make it back to 100%, but all things considered, this is pretty good.
It's hard to tell how long I have been away from earth, but given this trip was meant to last a very long time, I don't suspect I should miss my flight, so long as I find my portal. As long as I can find Eddy. So long as I can find all of them; Eddy, Rook, James, even Jyong and Me-Yan.
Ted's people had a similar arrangement to earth's at first. When Ted was an explorer, their portal was at the edge of the system, but they brought it down to their planet with rockets and parachutes after he and a few others never came back. The history was fascinating. They were a united planet, far and above the most advanced I have come across so far, but in spite of that, the portal slowly leeched off the planet, and spat out horrors beyond their imagination. What they once used as an interstellar fast travel, quickly turned into a speed bump, then a health hazard. There was a reason the builders set this portal so far away from the planet. It wasn't meant to be here, so Ted's people had to build a wall, with poor old lost Ted on the other side. They closely monitored the other side though, and were shocked to find the brain activity of a Tedidian coming from yours truly. That would be Ted's mind, shoulder to shoulder with mine, in my head if you weren't following along. Then they rescued me from Brad.
Speaking of, I asked around about Brad. Someone shot him, so that someone should know if he survived. I had to know if he would be waiting for me on the other side. Eventually, I asked the right person, who introduced me to my rescuer. He wore a white uniform and carried a big gun, even for Tedidian standards. I was kinda jealous. I like my pew pews, but these things were on another level.
He confidently told me that Brad was indeed "dead." I had Ted translate for me whenever I spoke to a native, but they were quickly learning on their own how to speak Sean-ese. That's the language I told them I speak. Might as well leave a lasting mark. That confidence, however, did not come from a place I liked.
"But did you actually see it dead?" I pressed.
"Nothing survives a plasma arc, even a graze, let alone two." He scoffed. Or I think he scoffed. There is no universal interplanetary sign that someone is scoffing at you. You just have to pick up on subtle undertones of pride, shock, or snood. Ted had lots of snood. Luckily, he broke the mold. The people here were as different as people are on earth. I just happened to get the most insufferable one imaginable. Just my luck.
"Then call this thing 'nobody,' because it survived one before." I suggested.
His eyes widened, glad to see that was an interplanetary sign of surprise. "Th-that isn't possible."
"Oh, but it is." Ted interjected
Oh good, that thing could be waiting for me for all I know. I never thought I'd be scared to be without a Ted in my head, but there I was, terrified. He was right. Without him, I had no defense.
We were walking back to Ted's place when I began replaying the past events in my head. My vision was something I couldn't shake. It was real. I felt like I was one of those chains of self-replicating chemicals. That's almost all they were, chemicals, but they had every marker required to classify life. They even responded to change in the environment. They were short-lived bonded protein chains that consumed, produced waste, even grew by self-replication and bonding.
"Hey Ted," I started. "I wanted to run something by you."
"I'm listening, but let's keep it under 280 characters. I'm not in the mood for a marathon today."
I rolled my eyes. "Glad to see you're back to your old self."
"My old self? I've been trying to get back to that, but every time I open my eyes, there you are."
"Look here Dane Cook, I saw something after the attack. It was on another planet. I think someone is trying to show me something."
"You were also close to Brad at the time, who we know can alter your perception."
"Maybe, but this felt different. The first time he affected my mind, he put me in a dreamlike state. Then he used something familiar to me to disguise himself. This was different. I wasn't me, I was this green amino-acid chain with no protective coating. All I could sense were chemicals, no light, no sound, but I knew what was happening too, like I was watching from the outside at the same time."
Ted learned how to roll his eyes just now from me, and mimicked the action to an exagerated end. "Don't think much about it. Many Tedidians see a light at the end of a tunnel when we are close to death. Perhaps this is just your version."
"Perhaps." One thing is certain, even if it scares me, I would be glad to be without Ted. I almost forgot how annoying he was after our little bonding session.
"But I have a question for you. Who is Dane Cook?"
"My planet's worst comedian. Thats not the point."
The day did come that I had to leave, and Ted, in his usual fashion, refused to say goodbye. Instead, all he would say is "I won't be far behind." Cryptic, right? Like, what is that supposed to mean?
At first, I thought "Great. And right after I thought I got rid of him." But then I thought about it. It would be an interesting cultural slang to say "we will meet again." Does Ted believe in an afterlife?does he think I'll wimp out and come back?
Pointless questions aside, there was some good news. He gave me a new gun. This one made an even bigger "kaboom!" It was really fun. Heh. Haha. Gimme-gimme.
I was happy to see Jim-Bob waiting for me at the portal. I hadn't seen him since I set off that sonic weapon. Their feet are so sensitive to vibrations and sound, that weapon really messed with them. The Tedidian doctors had their work cut out for them fixing 5 listening organs per Jim-Bobidian. Together, all 20 odd Jim-Bobs and I, stepped through the portal to the nightmare world.
Now that I was on this side of the portal, I could see that Brad was gone. Oh boy, what fun. You know what else? I held onto that old piece of alien tech that Ted had his brain shoved into. I thought it would make a neat souvenir. Wouldn't you believe it if as soon as the doors closed behind me, I heard that S.O.B's voice saying "So, where to next?"
Ted copied himself yet again into that stupid thing. Didn't take long to figure out what he meant by "I won't be far behind."
"What the hell, Ted?" I shouted.
"Surprised to hear my voice?" He asked?
"More pissed than surprised. I thought I finally got rid of you."
"Oh stop it, you are happy to see me, admit it."
"I thought you wanted to go home. What happened to me just being a pair of legs?"
"Ah yes, but there's a crucial difference between that Ted and this one. This one is artificial, and doesn't get lonely. I am merely a copy of a personality. That way, when you die, I won't get homesick."
"I smell bullshit," I said.
Surprisingly, he didn't make an astronauts and diapers joke. Instead, he said "Got me. I am an explorer, remember? Even if I was homesick, I still yearn for the other-worldly. My adventuring days are not yet over, and this way, I can never die, unlike someone I know."
"News flash, Ted, you did die, and give me that self-aggrandizing crap you pulled in the beginning, and I'm throwing your immortal ass down the throat of the next giant monster I find."
"My path will remain rectilinear, and true."
"Rectum what now? I thought you only knew words I used in front of you. I don't even know what you said."
"True, but now I have learned how your language works, thus am able to intuit new words. You cannot convince me that was not a word. Go- 'look it up' or whatever when you get back to Earth. It means 'I'll stay on the straight and narrow.'"
"Then why didn't you just say so? You're already teetering on the edge of being too annoying to keep around, buddy." I threatened, but I had to admit, a translator would be nice.
I have to say, the next leg of the journey went on without a hitch. The Jim-Bobs, Ted, and I were making good time. Find a monster, kill it, find a planet, explore it, find another monster, kill it too. I found so many new planets, although most were dead or never had life to begin with. The odd part was, Ted was sure he had visited some before, and interacted with the residents, but there was nothing but rock where I stood.
submitted by Plastic_Finish1968 to humansarespaceorcs [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 17:56 Plastic_Finish1968 The Long Walk Home: chapter 10 (Tall Dark and Extraterrestrial)

Have you ever witnessed the first formation of life? I mean, I've seen my children, I was there for every step of the process if you know what I mean. Hah. But what I'm talking about is from beyond the beginning. The molten slag of a planet forming over millions or even billions of years into a habitable plane. Have you seen, from that very point, chemicals coalescing and reproducing? Amino acids and the forming proteins?
Well today, I found out, when you die in the crypts, you don't see a light in the end of a tunnel. You witness something truly beautiful and pointless.
I watched the birth of life from nothing. Short molecular protein chains. No cell walls, no encasing membranes. If DNA or genetic code of any kind was in their descendant's future, it wasn't present now. I watched it cling to the surface of rock, self-replication fueled by the warm free energy of a sun, millions of generations, hard work, decay, and new growth, only to be destroyed by a crashing wave. The weak hydrogen bonds were broken, as simple as that. The ancestor's hard work gone in a single blink-and-you-miss-it moment. Somehow I knew, wherever this was, that was all the life that planet would ever see until it was swallowed up by its star.
It was a quick fleeting spark. All the dramas and soap operas in the world could have taken place in a single raindrop. A unique potential, unlike any others, this planet's chosen ones, snuffed out before it could evolve to breathe its first breath. Rather grim isn't it? I don't know why I dreamt it, but there it was, a pointless creation followed by an equally pointless destruction. I guess it was a nice commercial break from the missing-arm-induced pain i was suffering. A wonderful hilucination, if a bit mocob.
Anyway, back to my unimaginable blood-curdling, mind-wrenching torture porn session. My eyes were closed a very long time, but when they did open, I was finally where I should be. Horizontal in a hospital bed, surrounded by trained surgeons. That said, it was on an alien world, and the surgeons were not trained in human biology. What's worse, they had no way to dull the pain.
Death would have been a blessing, unfortunately, the doctors were good, in spite of the unknown make, model, and engine size laying before them. 5 hours under an experimental knife, and I think an arc welder, is what it took to reattach my arm and fix my internal organ damage. 5 hours of poking and prodding and searing and stitching and pulling and zapping. All things considered, I am impressed it only took 5 hours. Ted's species was remarkable when it came to taking in new information and applying it in the real world. All their extra brains probably didn't hurt either.
If you remember, Ted's species came equipped with five extremity brains, and a central one. That's three for all three of his legs, two for both of his arms, and one in his central body. Ted would have had six individual minds within him before I found him dead in a ditch beside that interstellar sidewalk. By that point, only one, Ted, had survived.
After my, let's say, unique experience, I was left alone in a dark room to rest. Ted came by to visit. Oh yeah, he had a body now. He wore that "Tall, dark, and extraterrestrial" look well. He was easily 7 feet tall in his real body. Those Ted-fu moves should pack a real punch in a body like that.
"That reminds me. You wanted your fighting moves back, right?" My voice was terribly parched after my morning shouting sessions.
Shouting obscenities at medical proffesionals was about all I could do when Ted's doctors were busy inventing a new form of torture. Seriously, take notes. Good stuff in there.
"Keep them. That isn't going to be my concern here. It's hard to even walk now, let alone fight." He admitted. "I'm used to having secondary brains do all the work. I would only take over when the situation required. Now, I'm all I've got."
"Just another one of us handicap one-brainers," I taunted. "How does it feel to be on my level? Could you say you're just 'too single-minded?"
He laughed. I don't think I've ever heard Ted lower himself to laughing at one of my jokes. It wasn't even a good one. I know I could have come up with something better. Hold on. I- huh... well, I guess the moment has passed.
Instead, I teased him again. "so, you have a sense of humor after all."
"Always have. You just aren't funny." He shot back.
Then it was my turn to laugh at a bad joke.
"Bad idea!" I realized aloud. "Laughing hurts. Don't make me laugh."
There was an awkward silence before Ted finally spoke again. Our whole conversation was full of them.
"You're going back there aren't you?" He asked.
"I have to. I have a family somewhere, and I have to know if they're still alive. Something bad is happening on earth and I just want to be there to protect them."
"I don't think you ever will find out."
"Blunt and to the point today are ya?"
"Always have been. You just never listen. Im serious. I dont think you'll make it home."
There it was again, that quiet that kept creeping back up into our conversation.
"What if you run into Brad again?" He asked. "I won't be there to reboot your brain next time. You will either die or-"
"Don't tell me."
"Or you will suffer greatly, then die." He continued while checking his version of fingernails.
"I told you not to tell me. Now I can choose which option I like better."
"I'm being serious." He shot back at me. "You have no defenses against him."
"I know. I'm hoping he's dead. That's three shots from a Tedidian gun he has taken now."
Neither of us were convinced.
"Tedidian? That's the name you gave my species? I'm honored."
"I'm the first of my kind here, I get the naming privileges."
If our conversation took place over the radio, the host would be mortified. Not by the subject matter, no. The silence would be dubbed "dead air" and the host would desperately clamor for a new topic to keep the dialogue active and dynamic. We didn't have that luxury. I think Ted was sorry he couldn't have done more to help, but he would never admit it. I actually might miss him after all- Nah... Too stuck up his own butt to admit his shortcomings. I dont need a guy like that tagging along.
"Do you- mourn the loss of your secondary minds? Were they separate thinking entities?"
"I mourned their loss eons ago. I have moved on. Now I have to re-remember how to walk and talk and do math equations without them. I will be slower than my academic peers, but I have with me knowledge of the unknowable. That should make up for some of my deficiencies."
Eventually, Ted was ushered out. I needed the rest. The doctors here were good. They had managed to piece together this broken puzzle written with a completely different alphabet, and accelerated my healing a great deal. Not really a surprise, given they could build Ted a whole new body. I was back on my feet in a matter of 2 days, using my arm in 3, and back to 70% at 4. I dont think I'll ever make it back to 100%, but all things considered, this is pretty good.
It's hard to tell how long I have been away from earth, but given this trip was meant to last a very long time, I don't suspect I should miss my flight, so long as I find my portal. As long as I can find Eddy. So long as I can find all of them; Eddy, Rook, James, even Jyong and Me-Yan.
Ted's people had a similar arrangement to earth's at first. When Ted was an explorer, their portal was at the edge of the system, but they brought it down to their planet with rockets and parachutes after he and a few others never came back. The history was fascinating. They were a united planet, far and above the most advanced I have come across so far, but in spite of that, the portal slowly leeched off the planet, and spat out horrors beyond their imagination. What they once used as an interstellar fast travel, quickly turned into a speed bump, then a health hazard. There was a reason the builders set this portal so far away from the planet. It wasn't meant to be here, so Ted's people had to build a wall, with poor old lost Ted on the other side. They closely monitored the other side though, and were shocked to find the brain activity of a Tedidian coming from yours truly. That would be Ted's mind, shoulder to shoulder with mine, in my head if you weren't following along. Then they rescued me from Brad.
Speaking of, I asked around about Brad. Someone shot him, so that someone should know if he survived. I had to know if he would be waiting for me on the other side. Eventually, I asked the right person, who introduced me to my rescuer. He wore a white uniform and carried a big gun, even for Tedidian standards. I was kinda jealous. I like my pew pews, but these things were on another level.
He confidently told me that Brad was indeed "dead." I had Ted translate for me whenever I spoke to a native, but they were quickly learning on their own how to speak Sean-ese. That's the language I told them I speak. Might as well leave a lasting mark. That confidence, however, did not come from a place I liked.
"But did you actually see it dead?" I pressed.
"Nothing survives a plasma arc, even a graze, let alone two." He scoffed. Or I think he scoffed. There is no universal interplanetary sign that someone is scoffing at you. You just have to pick up on subtle undertones of pride, shock, or snood. Ted had lots of snood. Luckily, he broke the mold. The people here were as different as people are on earth. I just happened to get the most insufferable one imaginable. Just my luck.
"Then call this thing 'nobody,' because it survived one before." I suggested.
His eyes widened, glad to see that was an interplanetary sign of surprise. "Th-that isn't possible."
"Oh, but it is." Ted interjected
Oh good, that thing could be waiting for me for all I know. I never thought I'd be scared to be without a Ted in my head, but there I was, terrified. He was right. Without him, I had no defense.
We were walking back to Ted's place when I began replaying the past events in my head. My vision was something I couldn't shake. It was real. I felt like I was one of those chains of self-replicating chemicals. That's almost all they were, chemicals, but they had every marker required to classify life. They even responded to change in the environment. They were short-lived bonded protein chains that consumed, produced waste, even grew by self-replication and bonding.
"Hey Ted," I started. "I wanted to run something by you."
"I'm listening, but let's keep it under 280 characters. I'm not in the mood for a marathon today."
I rolled my eyes. "Glad to see you're back to your old self."
"My old self? I've been trying to get back to that, but every time I open my eyes, there you are."
"Look here Dane Cook, I saw something after the attack. It was on another planet. I think someone is trying to show me something."
"You were also close to Brad at the time, who we know can alter your perception."
"Maybe, but this felt different. The first time he affected my mind, he put me in a dreamlike state. Then he used something familiar to me to disguise himself. This was different. I wasn't me, I was this green amino-acid chain with no protective coating. All I could sense were chemicals, no light, no sound, but I knew what was happening too, like I was watching from the outside at the same time."
Ted learned how to roll his eyes just now from me, and mimicked the action to an exagerated end. "Don't think much about it. Many Tedidians see a light at the end of a tunnel when we are close to death. Perhaps this is just your version."
"Perhaps." One thing is certain, even if it scares me, I would be glad to be without Ted. I almost forgot how annoying he was after our little bonding session.
"But I have a question for you. Who is Dane Cook?"
"My planet's worst comedian. Thats not the point."
The day did come that I had to leave, and Ted, in his usual fashion, refused to say goodbye. Instead, all he would say is "I won't be far behind." Cryptic, right? Like, what is that supposed to mean?
At first, I thought "Great. And right after I thought I got rid of him." But then I thought about it. It would be an interesting cultural slang to say "we will meet again." Does Ted believe in an afterlife?does he think I'll wimp out and come back?
Pointless questions aside, there was some good news. He gave me a new gun. This one made an even bigger "kaboom!" It was really fun. Heh. Haha. Gimme-gimme.
I was happy to see Jim-Bob waiting for me at the portal. I hadn't seen him since I set off that sonic weapon. Their feet are so sensitive to vibrations and sound, that weapon really messed with them. The Tedidian doctors had their work cut out for them fixing 5 listening organs per Jim-Bobidian. Together, all 20 odd Jim-Bobs and I, stepped through the portal to the nightmare world.
Now that I was on this side of the portal, I could see that Brad was gone. Oh boy, what fun. You know what else? I held onto that old piece of alien tech that Ted had his brain shoved into. I thought it would make a neat souvenir. Wouldn't you believe it if as soon as the doors closed behind me, I heard that S.O.B's voice saying "So, where to next?"
Ted copied himself yet again into that stupid thing. Didn't take long to figure out what he meant by "I won't be far behind."
"What the hell, Ted?" I shouted.
"Surprised to hear my voice?" He asked?
"More pissed than surprised. I thought I finally got rid of you."
"Oh stop it, you are happy to see me, admit it."
"I thought you wanted to go home. What happened to me just being a pair of legs?"
"Ah yes, but there's a crucial difference between that Ted and this one. This one is artificial, and doesn't get lonely. I am merely a copy of a personality. That way, when you die, I won't get homesick."
"I smell bullshit," I said.
Surprisingly, he didn't make an astronauts and diapers joke. Instead, he said "Got me. I am an explorer, remember? Even if I was homesick, I still yearn for the other-worldly. My adventuring days are not yet over, and this way, I can never die, unlike someone I know."
"News flash, Ted, you did die, and give me that self-aggrandizing crap you pulled in the beginning, and I'm throwing your immortal ass down the throat of the next giant monster I find."
"My path will remain rectilinear, and true."
"Rectum what now? I thought you only knew words I used in front of you. I don't even know what you said."
"True, but now I have learned how your language works, thus am able to intuit new words. You cannot convince me that was not a word. Go- 'look it up' or whatever when you get back to Earth. It means 'I'll stay on the straight and narrow.'"
"Then why didn't you just say so? You're already teetering on the edge of being too annoying to keep around, buddy." I threatened, but I had to admit, a translator would be nice.
I have to say, the next leg of the journey went on without a hitch. The Jim-Bobs, Ted, and I were making good time. Find a monster, kill it, find a planet, explore it, find another monster, kill it too. I found so many new planets, although most were dead or never had life to begin with. The odd part was, Ted was sure he had visited some before, and interacted with the residents, but there was nothing but rock where I stood.
submitted by Plastic_Finish1968 to HFY [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 17:50 No_Shirt2198 23 [M4F] Austin, TX/Online - Looking for a down to earth connection

Hello, I graduated college a year ago, moved to Austin, and started a job. I'm a bit of a homebody, finding comfort in the coziness of my own space. I'm seeking a genuine connection with the right woman that shares my interests and appreciates me.
Who I am:
I'm a 6ft, average build, mild-mannered guy with a good sense of humor. My main hobby is PC gaming. I am a competitive person and I enjoy games like League of Legends and Escape from Tarkov. I also would love to find someone I can play co-op games with as well, like Stardew Valley or Minecraft.
I really enjoy watching YouTube, tv shows, and movies. I mostly watch thought-provoking video essays or gameplay videos. Some tv shows I'm interested in and looking forward to watching are Survivor, House of the Dragon (S2), Severance (S2), The Acolyte. I'm also always down to watch a random episode of Parks and Rec or The Office.
I have a creative side and I like making goofy memes for my friends about inside jokes or just funny stuff I think of. I've been doing origami off and on since middle school and it's fun from time to time. I'm also into building models and I have a friend that's teaching me to paint miniatures as well.
Who you are:
I'm searching for someone that is 21-25 years old, close to finishing college or already in a career, and shares my mindset and some of my interests. I would like you to be confident and content with yourself and a good communicator. Honestly, just be true to yourself and be able to hold a conversation and have interests of your own.
Some thoughts:
I am all about good. meaningful communication. I'm looking for someone that is willing to put in the effort to form a real bond. I believe relationships are a two-way street and both partners have to give and take equal amounts.
I would prefer to text and voice chat on discord. After our introductions, I'd like to exchange pictures so that we both have a clear idea of each other's appearance. If you made it through my post and are interested in getting to know me then please shoot me a message.
submitted by No_Shirt2198 to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 17:02 ThrowMeAway97979797 Clueless about perception of me (public vs. private)

Hello, im 28
so Im very confused about peoples perception about me and how I stop enforcing this.
It started early on in school, that I had the bullying problem. I got joked about constantly and had some stupid nicknames. I got beat on my arms and thrown to the floor occasionally. This lasted for like 2-3 years and kinda vanished when I was like 15-16. Probably because one of them said "look he defends himself", which was the hint I needed probably. They also grew out of it.
Most of the time they were my "friends". I also noticed, they had no problem with me when I hang out with them alone. One of my friends before school also made fun of me in groups, while actually being my best buddy.
I didnt feel disliked or wrong, I just didnt get the reason. I tried to solve the issue at that time. I never had any issues with my abilites or skills or thought I deserved this treatment.
I found out the violent ones, got beat by their parents. My best buddy was jealous of me going to a "better" school (parents talking). Jealousy got confirmed on other ocassions as well, but that wasnt the only reason. I just attracted to much attention by bad social skills, blabbering about my interests to much and also didnt defend myself. I found out about autism a year ago only. My self-esteem is much better now, but probably there is this CPTSD... I feel kind of in danger but Im really not. Fearing others seems to be perceived as low self-esteem for men, I believed having lower self-esteem then I actually had a long time. I mean its what I think of myself right?
Today I still feel like people are generally either not interested or really fascinated about me. At the same time I dont get respected in groups much alot either case. I know/think I have to defend myself if someone jokes verbally, but that is really hard kind of. Also not going to far, because jokes are "just meant funny" yknow.
Why are they so clueless about others perception of me? Im very open about myself and dont hide the many bad things that happened even in my adulthood. People are very honest to me and thats alot of their fascination I guess, just speaking about things they usually cant. They dont really understand that everyone else thinks the same. I feel like they dont want to like me and dont think others do too. Ive had or thought girls being attracted to me, but I didnt get it early enough or they didnt pursue it. Im very careful approaching girls myself, because I might harass them missing non-verbals.
Ive had very intense friendships and one relationship(4years). My potential is often spoked about, which today I recognise as my talent and probably the way they want me to use it. Also its neutralizing the compliment kind of. It ends pretty bad most of the time and I get demonized alot, still getting attention, but without talking to me in person. Ive done and received alot of toxic stuff. I dont want to be toxic, but its hard.
I guess I shouldnt let people open up to much in private, when they cant take it in public. But I really love this trait of me..
Any tips to break this pattern? Im likeable, but get perceived as not? Why are they ashamed or are they? Obviously most dont care. Which is fine. But when they do, it goes bad soon enough.
submitted by ThrowMeAway97979797 to autism [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 16:16 AutumnFanatic 22 [M4F] #Online - Good morning! Nerdy guy who lately has had zero social interaction looking for a female interested in forming an intimate connection/relationship

Why did the farmer visit the pharmacy? To speak with the farm-assist.
Hi and welcome to my post! Wanted to start off with a funny to me dad joke.
Nice to meet you, I'm Dylan! To put it simple, I am a single 22 year old man who has been pretty lonely in life and lacking in female connection and interaction. And part of what comes with that is the desire to be intimate with a person. I am very mature for my age and will always be respectful of your boundaries and feelings, especially with anything sexual. Lately all I have is myself when it comes to sexual desires, so I would like to have someone to keep company with in that regard too.
I'm just relaxing in bed before work and burning a woodwick candle. Perfect for when there's a storm outside. I love candles! 🕯️ Sometimes a campfire outside on a fall night or a crackling WoodWick candle is a relaxing constant among our busy and hectic world. It's nice to just disconnect, feel grounded and happy in your own little cozy space. Feeling calm and collected and at peace. Something that fewer people take the time to do these days.
I am seeking a woman around my age or older to build a close connection with that could possibly lead to a relationship and something intimate which includes the possibility of teasing/sharing pics etc. but only when we were comfortable. Figured I would be open in my Intentions as that's the best way to be.
You:
Kind, respectful, and easy going.
Comfortable with the idea of eventually sharing intimate things together.
Willing to eventually move off of Reddit.
Want something genuine and fun!
Are honest in your intentions and a good person to be around!
That's about it, we will get along great I know it.
I've been feeling a little bummed out lately. I always try and stay happy and see the best in things. But.. I've just been so alone. Most of my whole childhood and adult years have been spent feeling lonely. I grew up surrounded by cornfields which was peaceful but also has a lonely aspect to it. My family never really were close and never did anything as a family really. And part of it too is the fact that I never had any neighbors my age to interact with. But aside from that, my adult life has been very lonely. I'm just always by myself. I barely have any meaningful adult relationships or experiences, or even any friends.
I work a 3-11 job in building maintenance at my company world headquarters building which I love, but again it's very lonely. I work the off shift so the building is always empty. I don't get normal social interaction with people my age or a chance to build relationships. I only have 3 older men as co-workers and we are mostly in the basement away from any people on the floors from knowing our existence. I always walk the floors and see office people laughing and chatting with their coworkers and I just don't have that kind of experience. And just.. no one knows I exist really. Everyone probably assumes I have a lot of friends, but I'm struggling inside with being so alone and trying to meet people and get past the "hi how are you?" "I'm good thanks" stage. Most people don't seem to want to talk beyond that. And most women are already in relationships and thus it would seem weird to approach them in an office setting trying to get to know them deeper. But man those "hi how are yous" are the only real interactions I get during my day.. so thus I decided to come here lol. Rant over, sorry! I promise I'm not a downer. 😅
Now for some things about me!
As you can tell, I am very mature for my age and am polite and have good grammar which unfortunately not everyone my age does anymore lol. I am not active at all on social media/internet culture really and don't know much about all the slang the younger people these days use. I feel like I'm 50. 🤣
I am left handed which is pretty cool. I'm not much of a party person or a drinker, I much prefer a quiet night at home and maybe a beer or two on a weekend but that's about it. I am simple and stay out of drama and trouble and don't get much into politics or other things that cause drama with people. I much prefer a relaxing campfire and a night at home and to just let the world keep on turning haha. I consider myself pretty intelligent and mature, especially for my age which is why I'm open to older ladies.
Physically I'm 180 pounds, have brown hair, green eyes, and a typical build. There's a few pictures on my profile.
Some of my hobbies are:
• Photography
I have a Nikon D200 and D5500 that I love to shoot with. I love nature scenes, abstract, black and white/goth kinda photography, sunsets, etc. it's so fun to just let your mind explore. It's not about what camera you have, but those who are behind the camera! I'm gonna try and photograph the northern lights tonight!
• Cooking and baking
I loveeee to cook and bake! I enjoy making various meals but also love to just have a frozen pizza once in awhile or something like that. I recently made homemade chili which turned out great. I love to bake, especially in the fall! I love pies, cakes, pastries, cookies, etc. I restored a vintage KitchenAid mixer that needed tbe gearbox rebuilt. Eventually I would love to practice home canning my own food.
• Music
Oh my gosh, I like so much!! Alternative rock, punk, post punk, electronic, synth pop, psychedelic rock, hard rock, etc. I am very non judgemental and open when it comes to music. My three current favorite bands are Type O Negative, Joy Division, and the Cure.
• Nature walks and camping
I really enjoy camping, making fires, and relaxing by a campfire. I love to take walks outside and just enjoy the beauty and simplicity of nature. It's wonderful, especially in a world so focused on everything digital.
• Repairing things
I'm a maintenance guy and one of my hobbies is electronics repair so I am good with my hands and just all around good at troubleshooting and fixing all sorts of things around the house. Last week I helped my elderly neighbor get his tractor started, it needed a new component in the starting circuit. So I'm pretty handy which... Comes in handy! 😂
• Autumn 🍁
This isn't a hobby per say, but man do I love the fall!!! It's my absolute favorite time of the year. Oh my gosh. The beautiful colors, crisp cool air, misty and foggy days, rain, lack of bugs, being cuddled up with a candle or by the fire drinking a tea, etc. I love it! There's only two seasons for me. Fall, and waiting for fall! Haha.
• Scented Candles and incense
Going along with my love for fall, I absolutely love candles! I have like 30 something lol. 😂 Currently my favorite are WoodWick, which are owned by Yankee candle. They have such a soothing crackle and the scents are great! I also love to burn incense from time to time as well. I have cottagecore hippie vibes.
• Old houses and architecture
I love old houses! Especially 1900s and Victorian era homes. Old homes have so much character to them and are just so beautiful from a time when people took pride in their craft. I strongly dislike the modern cookie cutter cheap construction of homes today. I would love to live in an old home one day. I also love their architecture and uniqueness, as well as architecture of old cathedrals and other buildings.
• Relaxing
Basic I know, but sometimes on the weekend I just love to get cozy in bed and relax and put on a YouTube video or an album! 😊
That's about it for me, I'm a pretty laid back and simple person. My ideal person is someone who is respectful and honest! I am very straightforward and open minded and would hope that you are as well.
If I seem interesting to you at all I would love to hear from you!
Thank you so much for reading.
submitted by AutumnFanatic to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 15:17 YourCaveMan 27[M4F]#Online-Just looking for a simple girl. Age, beauty, mental health issues don't matter. Want a lovely human being to fall in love with.

I will start it with some prominent character traits of mine. I would describe myself as a funny dude. Humor and i are synonymous but that doesn't mean I'm going to joke every possible second. Curiosity is in my DNA i guess. So you might often find out I'm asking many questions. Hmm..what else did i miss...well you'll find out more once you start chatting 😉
Things i like are looking at the sky, enjoying the beauty of the full moon when it comes out, spending time in nature, listening to EDM's and some pop music, watching endless hours of youtube videos, watching wrestling matches, and reading books. I read non fiction and thrillers mostly. Haven't tried any romance novels. If you want to suggest some then be my guest! Some other things I'm interested in are space,history, psychology, cars and a few other stuff. But i mostly talk about life in general, so no need to worry about the stuff i've mentioned. Btw, I'm not into video games. So can't talk about it with you sadly.
I'm looking for someone who engages in the conversation, someone who would be genuinely interested in me, and someone who wants to know me. Bonus if you're clingy! Timezone doesn't matter. So see ya in my chat/dm.
submitted by YourCaveMan to r4r [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 14:53 No_Funny3533 Miyuki Miyamoto/ Yomi / Jeong Nahyeon Scam Network Sites JPNDATE CUDATE DATESTEADY SAYHIUP

Miyuki Miyamoto/ Yomi / Jeong Nahyeon Scam Network Sites JPNDATE CUDATE DATESTEADY SAYHIUP
UPDATED INFO throughout it.
They have a new Scam Website: https://www.datesteady.com/ (Reuses JPNDATE assets even)
I think she Chinese and Korean.
They try to scam me a second time, her friend (I just wanted real love)
Yomi/ Miyuki Miyamoto/ Jeong Nahyeon
Written Before:
There is this dangerous woman (same person) running many fake Chinese Romance scam websites, fake Instagram pages, tik tok, We chats, and many Chinese porn sites. It is the same person, she uses her looks with pictures and videos to steal money from men. She has many names she goes by, probably even more than I found. She also uses bots to get fake likes and weird Anime filters to try to look like an idol. She has scam artist female friends also I found. She the leader.
I know a lot of scammers steal from other people's identities but that is not the case here. This is the same person as the scammer. My story will explain it. As well as this person has pictures of the same person you can’t find anywhere else on the Internet. Even if you do a Reverse Face image search. They said information that match to an unbelievable level.
The person who Scammed me:
Has Many names (Such As)
And a talent for speaking many languages
  • Miyuki Miyamoto (Claimed Japanese name)
  • Nickname Yomi
  • Korean Name: Nahyeon (Claimed)
  • u/yomi__na
https://www.instagram.com/yomi___na/
https://www.instagram.com/la.nnnn930/
https://www.instagram.com/hanhanhuwe/
https://www.instagram.com/gracegracemei/
Email: [miyukilovee@outlook.com](mailto:miyukilovee@outlook.com)
(Something about BlessCeline Lovee)
Skype ID: live:.cid.737fb9ac2ad5655c
  • Liu Mingmei (Claimed Chinese name)
Part of a Civil Union yet on multiple dating sites
(Make Sense)
u/mingmei1344
https://www.instagram.com/mingmei1344/
https://www.facebook.com/liuliu.meimingmei
(Owner of aiu_agency since 2015)
u/aiu_agency
https://www.instagram.com/aiu_agency/
Her Apartment or something
Google Drive (AI_U Agency)
Hotel Connected: SHILLA STAY Gwanghwamun
Her Scam Artist friends who work for both Ai_U Agency and JPNDATE CUDATE (That I found)

Vynnie_nat : https://www.instagram.com/vynnie_nat/#

jiejierui_ngc: https://www.instagram.com/jiejierui_ngc/

Veravera_zhangg: https://www.instagram.com/veravera_zhangg/

Elle_owo_elle : https://www.instagram.com/elle_owo_elle/

Qiqi_shenglim : https://www.instagram.com/qiqi_shenglim/

Myemye_owo_ : https://www.instagram.com/myemye_owo_/

Her Friends that are connected somehow but not sure how yet. They appear everywhere with the fake accounts

Riyandiwilliam : https://www.instagram.com/riyandiwilliam/

https://preview.redd.it/2d0g7b2las0d1.jpg?width=400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f25ee7d014b3ae338612c980a5db88eca5ef6cb5
Summary:
Jpndate.com is a dangerous Romance scam. All the women are paid actors for the website from China. They will try to get into a relationship with you very fast, don’t fall for it. They are milking you for money like if you're a cow. They will threaten to kill you or your family if you call out their scam. They might also say they will sue you. If you stop paying them, they will text you very little. They will never video call you face-to-face. Jpndate.com has a sister scam website from the same people called sayhiup.com. When you buy something on Jpndate the payment goes to Cudate Limited, so that site must be part of the scam also. There is a company in China doing all type of illegal and immoral practices. Their name is Zhengzhou Zhongzhiqi Technology Co., Ltd. / 郑州市中之祺科技有限公司 . They have their main technology business but they also run a list of many scam websites stealing money from American men, Asian, and European men. Such as Cudate, JPNDate, SayhiUp. These are romance scam sites where all the women work for the company. If you make a female account it will pend forever. Only men get approved. They claimed before to be an American-owned company then I exposed them now they claim to be Dutch. Their servers are all in China. They never filed paperwork with any foreign country. They are none of these the Chinese pretending to run many dating sites when in fact it’s all fake. They claim to be in nations their not. They have fake terms of service. I used PayPal before I didn't know it was a scam. I paid in dollars, but they refused to refund me till I told PayPal. PayPal made them. Then they refused to pay me the total amount they wanted to pay me on yuan when I paid dollars. I report them to FTC. They also try to hack my laptop for tell the government the truth about them. They probably get funds from the Communist Party government. They are very very bad people. Please look into it or forward this message somewhere where it can be looked into. Pretends to be a legit dating site but feel more like a pay-to-use website for fake love. All women here are paid actors for the site. The same few women have multiple profiles pretending to be different people. Funny part is anytime you call out JPNDate bs they change their terms of service. Screenshot everything people. They have a fake page saying their trying to stop scammers, it all bs they are the scammers.
Host of JPNDate Servers:
As the writing of this post:
IP: 47.242.112.134 - Server: nginx
GeoIP: HK - AS45102 (ALIBABA-CN-NET Alibaba US Technology Co., Ltd., CN)
My Story:
(Update): I know it is the same person, They told me in a text message.
Do you like Asian women?
Real Asian women?
These ones are real!
I know who they are.
Hi! This is Mark Faraday talking to you.
This is my story of how a website named JPNDate Idols scammed me out of 4000 American dollars.
First, I was on Japan Cupid, a dating site. On Japan Cupid, no one can chat unless one of you has a membership. I bought a 1-week membership. Within 5 minutes to 10 minutes, a woman nicknamed Yomi from Japan messaged me; this should have been a red flag for me. We talked for a while. She said she was interested in me. She asked me if I could move over to the dating site JPNDate because she paid for membership there and not Japan Cupid. She also promised to delete her account on Japan Cupid after we changed sites. She does delete her account off Japan Cupid.
Unlike a normal scam artist, who may only have 1 or 2 photos, she has several photos on her profile. My trust in her grows a bit seeing that. She then privately messaged me several more photos of her. She asked me for some photos, which I sent. She then sends back happy and heartfelt emojis. She told me she doesn’t date Asian men anymore because they were violent to her in the past and her last boyfriend cheated on her. She talked about how she didn’t want to fight with me. She also said we could talk about any topic.
She would compliment me often, as I did for her. Of course, on my profile page, I try to post my best pictures. Throughout my life, I have had many different hairstyles. She even mentioned this and got very happy and asked if I was a hairstylist.
The spam of talking between us was from January 20th, 2024, to March 24th, 2024.
On JPNDate, there is an upgrade system. You need Blue Diamond to chat with others. Crown to send videos. Blue Diamond is 20 dollars per month, and Crown is 80 dollars per month. I got the Blue Diamond membership at first. It showed her with it too. After a day or two, she asked me to upgrade like she did to the Crown membership so she could send me a video. I upgraded it, and she did actually send me a video. All pictures and the video match the same person and the same face. Some pictures were in different locations, and some were like three different pictures in the same place. We then later buy a 6-month Crown membership for each other because it is cheaper than 1 month at a time. I bought it for her, and she bought it for me.
At this point, I start to believe. This person was giving me all their time. They reply very often, and their texting time was the same as Japan timezones every single day. They spoke not only English but also Japanese almost fluently. However, they did let me know that they're still learning English and sometimes use a translator.
She let me know that this website has something called a mall. This should have been red flag number 2. You pay 1 American dollar for each gold point. Paypal is the only thing that works. When we started dating, she said it was normal for couples in Japan to send each other gifts. It was a symbol of forever love in Japan, she claimed. As an American, I didn’t know if this was true. I googled it and couldn’t get a clear answer. She said whatever I bought her, she would buy me as well. She asked if I liked necklaces or charms. I said anything was fine. She wanted me to pick up a necklace. At first, she picked up a $1,000 necklace from the site mall and asked me. I said no; that's way too much money for that. She said how about a 300-dollar Jade Romance charm. She told me to get her white one; she would get me the green one. I questioned if she was legit. She started crying. She somehow convinced me at the time that she was legit again. I did buy it. A few weeks later, I did receive the overpriced Green Jade Romance love charm to my address from her. I never told her which day exactly my tracking information said it would come to my house, but I asked her, and her tracking date was the same week as mine. By the way something almost the same as this necklace is 12 dollars on Amazon. It also broke when I got it in the mail. Probably cost them 2 cent to make.
For the next few days, we had a wonderful, happy conversation. It is late January, and I know Valentine's Day is coming. I offered to get her flowers. I got her flowers and chocolate at a very high price of multiple hundred dollars. She then gets so happy. She told me many times how she wanted to go to America and find me.
We talked about many topics for several more days. She told me she worked in an office in Tokyo. Yomi told me her real name was Miyuki Miyamoto. Which is very funny because I told her before I was a Nintendo fan, and this is the same last name as Mario and Zelda Creator. She also said she had her apartment to herself, which is true; she does own an apartment. She talked about how life is stressful right now in Japan. She claimed to have grown up in the Japanese town of Nagano, Japan. She also said she had gone to a university in Tokyo with a major in computer science. She wanted to visit America in July for 15 days when she had her time off. July is a normal time for people to get off in Japan for vacation, so I thought nothing of it.
I told her that I was from a smaller town in California, but I lived not far from San Francisco. I told her how my town is quiet and how I could see mountains outside my house. She said she wanted a peaceful life and that life in Tokyo is too fast. And she always had great things to say about every picture I sent. We also talk about going on dates. I asked most of the questions, but she did ask me questions as well.
I started to ask her a lot of questions about Japan. Like if she visited Himeji Castle, she said no. However, I did say yes to visiting Mount Fuji. I should have asked for a photo of this, but I didn’t. She was very happy; she told me very many topics about Japan. We even briefly talked about anime. She told me she liked Digimon, Dragon Ball Z, One Piece, and Detective Conan. This information is important later. We also talked about how both of us were big Disney fans growing up.
One day she told me, how work was busy today. I told her it was okay and we didn’t need to talk today. She did, however, still text me a little bit that day. This was the only day during our whole time talking when she was super busy. There is nothing wrong with this; all humans get busy. I decided to spend my evening drawing a picture of me and Yomi on a date to surprise her. When I sent it to her, she did not react. This was a red flag for me. I tried to convince myself that she just didn’t like drawings that much. I know I sound really dumb right here, but whoever I was talking to is very smart and knows a lot of things.
We started talking a few days later about the idea of meeting and going on dates together. I know that the yen is weak against the American dollar right now. I told them I would pay for anything they wanted when they were in America because I was in love. This was a big, big, big mistake. They then asked if I could give them 1500 dollars to buy a plane ticket. Never give money to people you never meet in real life, folks. Don’t be dumb like me. Turns out the ticket was actually 2100, so they asked for another 500 dollars the next day, claiming their friend let them borrow the money, and they paid the difference. They did show me a picture of a plane ticket. With the name Yomi and the correct airports in Tokyo and San Francisco. This gave me more trust in them; I got a lot of photos, videos, and even a picture of a plane ticket.
At some point, I talked to them about social media. They claim to only have Skype and Line. I found it very hard to believe a woman in her 20s wasn’t on Instagram or Tik Tok. I went on Instagram and typed Yomi, and I found a Yomi who looked just like her. This made me think: why did she lie? What confused me is that all the pictures on her Instagram were different from the ones she sent me, other than one image that was the same. Meaning that the images were not clearly stolen from there.
I looked up JPNDate online; there isn’t much info on this website (Right Now), other than one reddit forum from 1 year ago. Someone said something about being scammed by an IDOL on this site. They also said the website wasn’t in Japan but in China. I was wondering why I never saw new females joining the website; it was the same 23 pages worth of them. I wanted to test the website to see if it was legit. I made another account, a fake male account with AI artwork. It was approved in one second. I then made a fake female account; it said pending approval. It has now been 2 weeks since I made that account, and it still says pending approval. This means all the women on this website have to be fake actors. There is also a setting on JPNDate to see who has been online last or which accounts are the oldest. When I asked weeks before, Yomi claimed she had been on this website only for a short time. Her oldest picture was dated October 20, 2023. Yet she has the sixth-oldest account on JPNDate, according to the website. The reddit forum I talked about before was over a year old.
When I was on this website for a month, at least 10 other women tried to text me. There was this one profile of a woman from Taiwan, age 20. She texted me three times in one month. When I joined, her age was listed as 20, and at some point, she changed her age to 25 on her profile. I ignored all these women. This proves again that all these women are fake. I do think they are women based on how they type, but they are not truthful like they act like they are. As I write this, I just realized this is Yomi's sister; it matches the other Yomi account's sister tag.
I knew this website wasn’t telling the truth. I found the JPNDate IP address and tracked it to a server in Hong Kong, China, hosted by Alibaba cloud servers. Reddit was right; the website is Chinese. I took pictures of the website code just in case. I asked Yomi if she knew Alibaba. Then she asked if I’m going to China—a very strange follow-up question.
At this point, I was confused. Who is Yomi? I couldn’t find anything about Miyuki Miyamoto, only Yomi. On Yomi Instagram, she speaks Chinese, not Japanese. I started to think there are no Japanese women on this website like they claim to be. She does speak Japanese, though.
I started using more than 10 different software programs to track who Yomi was. I found like 1000 pictures of an idol, WeChat model, singer, dancer, person on endless Chinese dating sites, and a valiant professional gamer part of the AI’U agency for over 8 years. I found two other Instagram accounts with Yomi's face. Another account in Chinese with an idol name other than Yomi also had a Facebook page. The Chinese account has a post about her going to Australia in early 2024, where she is typing in English words. I also found an account where she speaks only Korean on Instagram. I also found a tik-tok where someone dances and looks 100% the same as Yomi, to whom I’m talking. The part that is crazy is that none of the images are 100% the same, but the person is the same in all of them.
This shocked me; I follow all the accounts. I saw the stories daily to see who this person was. Her Yomi account is just her normal pictures and atm company or something. Her Korean account is about traveling to Singapore, Spain, and South Korea. She also posts a lot about Disney toys here. When I talked to the scammer about Disney, I had no idea about this.
At this point, I knew that many men had been scammed out of money for fake love, not just me. These women are real women. However, there are actors pretending to be in love. They will crush your heart and call you names after a few weeks if you don’t buy their stuff. It has to be from JPNdate Mall only, nowhere else. JPNdate Mall prices are crazy high. I am not sure if the point of the website is just for money or if it is actually for women to study English or what. Chinese women, pretending to be Japanese (most of them), that have connections to Korean music and gaming on professional teams. Man, what a hell of a story this is. This sounds like a Hollywood movie, but it's real, or at least partly. At this point, everything I say seems to be true based on what I know.
Yomi told me early on that she had one older sister and one younger brother. It seems like she is actually a twin, and she is the younger sister. Yomi claims to be 25, but I think she is closer to 27 or 28 based on finding a listing of her work in 2015 at Twitch Gaming. You have to be 18 or older to work at Twitch gaming, unless your parents sign things.
When I showed the pictures I found to Yomi on JPNdate, she played the victim card on me. Saying she thinks I’m a liar and she wants to break up. Then she gave me her Skype account to try to prove it was legit, and all the other images and accounts were stolen and fake. Her Skype name is Rose, with a One Piece picture. She sent me many voice clips, crying, trying to convince me that she was real. I put them in software, and the voice was 30% human, 70% AI. Clearly, a woman is changing her Chinese or Korean voice to sound Japanese. A PC gamer would know how to do this; they do it all the time to troll. Yomi told me she didn’t play video games anymore, but I found a picture that wasn’t that old of a woman who looked the same as her; she had a Nintendo Switch with a white OLED in it. Btw it’s a known fact that Yomi uses software to cheat in the Pc FPS games.
I can’t let Yomi, her sister, and her idol friends scam men for their time and money. Yomi Chiense's name is Vera Yuanxin (维拉). Her twin sister goes by veravera_zhangg.
Yomi “deleted her profile” when I exposed her. But Yomi is still there with no pictures. Two they clearly have other accounts with people who look like she just changed hairstyle, talking and trying to scam other men.
Remember when I said the anime part was important? On Yomi's Korean account, she has a friend with whom she talks about Digimon. She gave him a Disney toy. She told me she wanted to cosplay a fox; his profile is a fox. There is just so much proof that these are the same people.
Later someone hit me up on Reddit from the Phillippines and told me how the same person Yomi scammed them. How for months Yomi promise them so many things. Then when they said it came to going on the plane to visit him they said they were sick or dying or something.
Yomi also made a fake Instagram pretending to be Joe Biden and sent me a friend invite. I messaged and it was so funny how bad it was on their part. I said “Yomi are you trolling me?” then they deleted their account. This was on April 6th, 2024. Yomi tries so hard but use a lot of cheap things that are clearly fake like ai artwork, bots for like at ai_u agency, and fake profiles where she comments herself and attacks anyone who calls her out fairly.
After exposing Jpndate they Ip ban my address lol. Then on social media joke about attacking me.
If you call out their BS they threaten your family and yourself. Just stay away from all these sites if you're going to date online use well-known legit sites. I got over 2000 screenshots of proof.
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submitted by No_Funny3533 to Romance_Scamer [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 13:47 forest-of-ewood Roaring Kitty tweet roundup 15th May - A humble apes opinion

Hello Apes,
Here's another review of Roaring Kitty tweets, if you wanna check out previous days then links are below:
13th May
14th May
To reiterate, the description of each tweet is to the best of my knowledge the references made to allow you to make your own view in context and the speculation is pure speculation on my part, this is just for fun and shouldn't be taken as any financial advice, make your own decisions, I just like the stock. If you have anything to add feel free to in the comments and I'll do my best to update the post but given the amount of tweets now i don't have lots of time.
8:00am - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790713748866371690
Description: This is taken from the film Easy-A and shows Emma Stone walking through school catching a lot of attention looking fine and what was an A sticker in the original clip has been replaced with the Gamestop play logo. The song is Sexy Silk by Jessie J
Speculation: The stock is sexy, particularly among the younger people. What was Easy-A is now Easy-Gamestop. Looking really great in the black.
8.15am - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790717515523658119
Description: First we have a scene from the movie Prestige, with a Michael Caine voiceover about a magicians magic trick of making something disappear. The quote is "The magician takes the ordinary something and makes it do something extraordinary. Now you're looking for the secret... but you won't find it, because of course you're not really looking. You don't really want to know. You want to be fooled. But you wouldn't clap yet. Because making something disappear isn't enough; you have to bring it back." Meanwhile a person with a gamestop logo is being electrocuted to life a little frankenstein like and then a Gamestop logo bursts through an explosion. We then go to a fight scene with the song "back in the saddle again" by Aerosmith playing.
Speculation: The quote from the Prestige in full talks about the different parts of making something disappear. In full " Every great magic trick consists of three parts or acts. The first part is called "The Pledge". The magician shows you something ordinary: a deck of cards, a bird or a man. He shows you this object. Perhaps he asks you to inspect it to see if it is indeed real, unaltered, normal. But of course... it probably isn't. The second act is called "The Turn". The magician takes the ordinary something and makes it do something extraordinary. Now you're looking for the secret... but you won't find it, because of course you're not really looking. You don't really want to know. You want to be fooled. But you wouldn't clap yet. Because making something disappear isn't enough; you have to bring it back. That's why every magic trick has a third act, the hardest part, the part we call "The Prestige"." The Aerosmith song also has some interesting lyrics, "Ridin' into town alone by the light of the moon" "I'm ridin', I'm loadin' up my pistol, I'm ridin', I really got a fistful, I'm ridin', I'm shinin' up my saddle, I'm ridin', this snake is gonna rattle"
8.30am - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790721293089964126
Description: Not sure what film this is from but essentially we have a group of people looking for someone who is messing with them, they come across the infamous meme of death looking for Gamestop and then they track down Roaring Kitty alongside 893489 CHIMP located in Boston. We then get a message of Prep mode and arm ready for transport, hold pattern until further notice and a message again on a watch saying the same with a Gamestop logo
Speculation: WS looking for DFV and just coming across more memes, not really understanding it. As pointed out by many, 893489 is the hexcode for purple https://www.colorhexa.com/893489 which could be a direct reference to people DRSing. Final message suggests it's a hold until further notice, potentially a gamestop announcement who knows?
8.45am - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790725065585439065
Description: We have a scene from Ozark where the wife of the money laundering family is alone in her bedroom reflecting to the sound of The Daily Mail by Radiohead. Some Gamestop logos on the wall which i think replace a picture of her family in the original clip. More reflection.
Speculation: Not sure about this one other than the family in Ozark were right on the line of legality when it came to what they were doing, essentially they were money laundering and in the end it cost them their family. SHFs messing with Gamestop to the point of legality could be what costs them their family of investors?
9.00am - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790728848226521547
Description: This is a famous scene from Star Wars where Han Solo takes them through the asteroid field despite C3-PO's cry that the odds are so greatly stacked against them, approximately 3720-1 to be exact! "Never tell me the odds" says Hans Solo. The Song Come Along by Cosmo Sheldrake comes on as the ship navigates it's way through.
Speculation: This play is a high risk play as we all know but DFV doesn't care about the odds, so many people have told him how crazy he is but that doesn't stop him absolutely nailing it. The song has some interesting lyrics to pick a few, "Don't let moments pass along, And waste before your eyes", "We'll be here when the world slows down, And the sunbeams fade away, Keeping time by a pendulum, As the fabric starts to fray" Full lyrics here
9.15am - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790732615022195139
Description: This is taken from The Chappelle Show "when keeping it real goes wrong". In this sketch Kitty replaces a lot of the words to relate to him and the scene ends with Wu-Tang being brought up.
Speculation: Really i think this is just DFV having some fun with this sketch, replacing the woofs for meows, it brings up Wu-Tang as well which was a talking point way back in the NFT marketplace chat.
9.30am - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790736391124774975
Description: We have a clip of Moon Knight from Fortnite alongside the song Day and Night by Kid Cudi. This is the official fortnite music video.
Speculation: The Moon Knight in fortnite is considered a rare character. In fact the last time the Moon Knight was in the fortnite shop was Nov29, 2023. With that, it's a very valuable and sort after skin. Also worth noting about the Moon Knight, "For a quick run-down: Moon Knight is actually a former mercenary named Marc Spector. One day, when he's left for dead in the desert, the ancient Egyptian moon god Khonsu revives him. Along with a new lease on life, Khonsu gifts Marc with god-like powers to fight evil". Take from that what you will.
9.45am - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790740164848861227
Description: Not 100% sure on the cartoon being shown but the rap is Mr. Niceguy by Will Smith.
Speculation: I don't think DFV is liking the public dissing he is getting from various media outlets but really he doesn't care that much as he can just nail some memes he has lined up like this. If you want the full lyrics to the song, you can find it here
10am - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790743946764644659
Description: This is the epic reveal in fight club and DFV has replaced a lot of the words. In the original scene, if you haven't watched fight club, the main protagonist has put the pieces together to realise that he himself is actually the same person as the other protagonist in the film and it was him alone that accidentally setup a sort of movement against the financial elite. In this clip DFV plays off the two characters between DFV and Roaring Kitty.
Speculation: Roaring Kitty was the twitter handle and Youtube profile for Keith Gill where he would speculate on the stock because he just loved doing it. DFV was the reddit handle where he is associated to that other sub i can't mention here but you know where i mean. I think that DFV is saying that what started as a fun speculation of the stock became something bigger than himself with his other channel in DFV on reddit. Now the wheels have moved and in the film it ends with the financial institutions being blown up, perhaps something similar metaphorically is already in place right now. It's actually a great analogy from DFV about his situation.
10.15am - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790747714440892825
Description: This is the scene in Breaking Bad where Walter comes clean to his wife Skylar about all the money he has made selling meth. Skylar sees him for who he really is in this scene and really it's the beginning of when Walter begins to really lose himself. There is a funny insert of Methamphetameme and a mention of Caroline who i believe is his wife in real life.
Speculation: I think this is just DFV having some fun and giving an idea of how nuts it probably was for him to talk to his wife about everything that has happened/is happening. I know to us DFV seems like some sort of oracle but to many people he would just seem like some of stock bro who is nuts, even his wife.
10.30am - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790751492451754012
Description: This is from the oceans 11 film again where the gang are discussing about what they are and how they have come to be. DFV inserts "the Cohen crunch" as what everything could be called and also says "One could make the argument that because it was in fact Cohen joining the board that seemed to kick things off maybe it should be...". DFV then has a big reveal of the reddit user u/ avocado-in-my-anus.
Speculation: Is this all about Ryan Cohen? Is it about DFV? Is it about the Squeeze? Or is it about Avocado in my anus!? - If you follow to that reddit user you will see 3 posts, all on October 29th of each of the last 3 years, all saying Happy Cat Day posted to 3 different subreddits, "never tell me the odds", "next fucking level" and "woah dude". Why is october 29th so significant? See for yourself here
10.45am - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790755264733626879
Description: First we have a clip taken from CNBC where they say "is Roaring Kitty the one running this company?". It then cuts to a classic superbad scene of lots of dicks being drawn.
Speculation: I would imagine CNBC's angle here is that in their opinion Roaring Kitty is the one helping the stock so much with his influence that he might as well be running the company. Judging by the fact we go to a load of dicks after that I don't think DFV agrees with that opinion...
11am - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790759048985612468
Description: This is taken from The Avengers Endgame and it's where Peter Quill and Thor are told they should fight one another for the honour of the leadership of the Guardians of the Galaxy. They reply they don't want to go against each other and then there is a little humored ambigurity over who is in charge.
Speculation: This could be about DFV and RC. Not 100% which one is which but DFV is saying they are on the same side and respect each other in their view on what is best for Gamestop. DFV conceding he isn't in charge here and sort of plays into the last meme.
11.15am - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790762813868175516
Description: This is a scene taken from Love Actually and you will most likely recognize Rick from The Walking Dead. In the original clip he is filming his best friend (and it turns out he actually is in love with his best friends wife in this film). It then cuts to some memes of Ryan Cohen and a clip from his stream about updating thesis regularly.
Speculation: I think this is summed up pretty well by u/ starhammer4billion. "In 2021, DFV was mad, that R.C. did not push the button/do the buyback and told us clearly that he did not like R.C. anymore with this meme. Now in 2024, he rewinds that meme and tells us, that he thought that at the time in 2021, but that the investment thesis evolved over time and he now sees R.C. as a supermodel. So basically he saw what R.C. was doing in 2024, which he did not in 2021 and he likes R.C. again now. Probably because R.C. pushed the button and also did some plan with loopholes and stuff that DFV may not have thought about."
11.30am - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790766591526735887
Description: Here we have a clip from the music video Gossip Folks by Missy Elliot. Some of the lyrics have been replaced by Roaring Kitty. It tells the story of DFV and then there is a ton of emojis that read 😳💩😿🥜🐸🍦🤢👍👊💀🥸👀🤩⚡️🎮🚀🍄💥🍏🤨😵‍💫💜🫂👌🤝⛺️😼🎯👀🐶🇺🇸🎤👀🔥💥🍻
Speculation: DFV is saying this is going to go down again 3 years later after it all went down last time. The emojis i think tell the story so far too and maybe what's to come. I'll try my best to elaborate - it's really tinfoil but why not.
Edit\* As pointed out by u/ mmilad https://www.reddit.com/Superstonk/comments/1ctc9g2/dfvs_tweet_yesterday_with_emojis_are_all_rcs/ - they emojis do run in a sort of chronological order to a lot of RC's tweets, if you go to his twitter page and scroll through from his first tweet you can begin to tick off the emojis one by one.
11.45am - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790770363627921776
Description: We have a pizza being cut in too more and more slices and dubbed onto the pizza are reddit awards along with DFV's last position update post.
Speculation: The amount of awards that were constantly being given to this post got so out of hand i can't even think how many notifications and reddit coins DFV must have got back in the day. Definitely a joke on DFV's part and just a reminder to how funny it was the amount of awards he was getting.
12pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790774146994966570
Description: This clip is taken from Spiderman i think the one where Spiderman goes dark but i can't remember exactly. The music is The Black Swan taken from Swan lake and it cuts to the movie of Swan Lake with Natalie Portman as the Black Swan and Kitty being dubbed on her face as she transforms.
Speculation: Black swan events are defined as "A black swan is an unpredictable event that is beyond what is normally expected from a situation and that has potentially severe consequences". When GME does squeeze, it's going to have severe and brutal consequences for the market.
12:15pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790777913245421806
Description: First we have Snoop Dogg in his music video for Gin and Juice talking about drama in the GME then we cut to Scarlet Envy saying "is it me, am i the drama", "am i the villain?"
Speculation: Just DFV having fun with all the drama that is being caused through GME, through his memes and everything in a fun light hearted DFV meme of way.
12:30pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790781688848450012
Description: The first clip is taken from Oceans 12 where Ryan is bring the gang back together for an even bigger heist of casinos. Then we have part of the heist where he is stuck waiting in the dining cabinet and cannot escape until they let him out, then we cut to 2 people talking, "waiting", "for what?", "for this". Finally we cut to Batman, i think in the Dark Knight where the Joker is in the hospital and plans to blow it up.
Speculation: Bigger squeeze than last time, band back together, GME holders for the last 3 years could be like the guy in the box just let out in time by DFV, we say "where the fck you been?", he has been waiting, waiting for this.
12.45pm - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790785463118348420
Description: This is taken from The Dark Knight rises where Bane states "it doesn't matter who we are, what matters is our plan", "no one cared who i was until I put on the mask", "was getting caught part of your plan?" "of course"
Speculation: This is taken online about Bane in this movie, "Everything that Bane did was never for himself, not really, we find out his real loyalty later and I think that is a big reason why he said who he is wasn’t important. He wasn’t there to impress the masses, he was there to execute a plan, to be the playmaker for a person he cared for. He wasn’t one who liked distractions and the concern over who he was, I took it as he saw as unimportant to what the plan was itself" DFV doesn't matter, the whole thing is bigger than him now, similar to the fight club tweet reference.
1pm - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790789242513433071
Description: This clip is the big reveal in The Usual Suspects. BIG SPOILER HERE TO THE FILM - The police chief realizes in the film that he has just been completely done by the person who actually committed the crime and he was right there all along in the station . In this clip the drawn sketch of the suspect is replaced with the 'ill do it again' meme.
Speculation: The mug has roaring kitty on it so I wonder if this really is DFV noticing a similar pattern to what is happening with the stock as to what happened before and has made that realization that it's time to come back and this is all on again. HF's digging the same hole for themselves.
1.15pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790793012936851665
Description: This is a clip showing Keith Gill and a narrator saying that investors were looking for someone to blame for losing big on Gamestop. Then it cuts to "shut up bitch" from The Rock in WWF.
Speculation: This is a lol meme and basically DFV saying people invest themselves it's not his problem. People did try to sue him if i remember so it's a bit of a fuck you to them.
1:30pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790796790360363016
Description: This is taken from Seinfeld and is about how George goes so far just to zing a guy. DFV replaces some words and makes this about the previous tweet, some more fun on his part.
Speculation: The episode i believe this takes place is called "The Money" and the episode in which George actually flies out is called "The Comeback", jokes aside that's some interesting references...
1:45pm - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790800562654691686
Description: This is taken from the Saturday Night Live sketch 'old friend'. It's about two old friends reconnecting, DFV expertly chooses this and only has to change the last name of the Keith in the sketch.
Speculation: Everyone thinks DFV is nuts, i mean the guy is posting a lot of memes and taking away my work mornings trying to understand them. Maybe he just loves memes, who knows?
2pm - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790804340673789978
Description: This is a video of beat saber to the song freaks by timmy trumpet and savage. "The bass and the tweeters make the speakers go to war", "the mighty trumpet brings the freaks out to the floor", "where the freaks at?". Big tune and then the vibing cat makes an appearance.
Speculation: Hard to say much about this other than it's a fun song and makes you vibe just like the cat. People are coming to twitter to see his memes and we are all vibing out off of it.
2.15pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790808112741630320
Description: Shows a man being followed around by a man in a suit with a red right hand. I'm not sure what this is taken from but the song is definitely Red Right Hand by Nick Cave and the Bad seeds. For me personally this song is most associated with The Peeky Blinders.
Speculation: The man could be anyone short on GME and the man following him making him scared could be DFV or whatever else is going to pound on those shorts. If you want the lyrics to the song then you can find them here
2.31pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790812277530034448
Description: Shows a bear on a pink recliner with a kitty sneaking in the background.
Speculation: This was a direct response to a Jim Cramer tweet who was essentially poking fun at DFV by saying he should make more memes as it's not working on helping GME. Worth noting that this doesn't look like a scheduled tweet and was probably not planned.
2:45pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790815662203617755
Description: Shows Jim Carrey not 100% which movie it is though i recognize it with a red graph overlayed showing the stock price going down. His smile deteriorates but he seems to have some sort of demented plan in a weird way.
Speculation: Stock might be going down and that might initially take the smile off but the creepy smile at the end shows that it doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things, they are going to get it by the end.
3:00pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790819440617033914
Description: This is taken from the Truman show where Jim Carrey plays a character who's whole life is a television show for everyone else to watch. He is unaware of this but starts to become more aware as the film goes on. This particular clip is where he is trying to get to the edge of the world to see behind the curtain and the director is trying to stop him with lightning strikes and storms and whatever else he can throw.
Speculation: They are doing everything they can to keep a lid on GME. Firing as many shots as they can but it's not working. Is this the best they have?
3.15pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790823211745063394
Description: This is a clip from Dunkey's best games of 2017 and here we see a game where it's just boss fight after boss fight and is really fun.
Speculation: This is a game for us, they can hammer down the stock and do what they want but GME holders just keep buying more and moving to the next level
3.30pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790826988019528035
Description: This is taken from Tenet and is about inverted bullets. It talks about being able to drop bullets and bring bullets back up and move bullets without touching them.
Speculation: I certainly don't understand even a little of what is going on with the stock, but you can still have a feel for what is happening with the stock and it feels good right now even with the dip. Could be something to do with inverse hedging but don't know enough about that to speculate.
3.45pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790830761542664192
Description: Firstly we have the Matrix where Neo is about to fight Morpheus and then we have Alice in Wonderland with Alice going down into the rabbit hole. (The rabbit hole is mentioned in the Matrix too when Neo is given the pill option).
Speculation: The scene where Neo fights Morpheus is really the first time we start to see Neo believe in his ability to be the chosen one but also understand the power being able to beat the matrix. With the Alice in Wonderland it's about seeing how far the rabbit hole goes, things will get more crazy for sure and we are going to find out just how deep this goes.
4:00pm - https://x.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790834536403574936
Description: Here we have the music video for Karma police by Radiohead. A man is running from a car at a hobble speed and then stops turns around and there is a trail of fuel heading towards the car that has stopped. He pulls out a box of matches from his back pocket and is just before to set the car alight by dropping a lit match on the fuel.
Speculation: Another Radiohead song, you can find the full lyrics here but to pick a line out "this is what you get when you mess with us". Whilst being slowly chased down, there is going to be a flip reverse based on the trail left by the shorts only to blow it all up.
8:00pm - https://twitter.com/TheRoaringKitty/status/1790894938277695671
Description: This is taken from the Shawshank redemption where the main protagonist has escaped from the prison after being wrongly imprisoned for many years. DFV has changed some of the narrators (Red) words in showcase his story of being wrongly accused in 2021 and having the flee out of the spotlight. He talks about pressure and time, he presents a lot of memes he has created over the years and then shows a particular screenshot of one of his streams.
Speculation: This tells DFVs story but also has some juicy parts. I think Red in this is a bit like the reddit crew (us) keeping tabs on his story but DFV is saying to escape like him it takes pressure and time (could be gamma squeeze, could be LEAPS, could be DRS, could be holding and buying, could be ALL of it) but all it takes is time and pressure. The memes he posted i wonder if some of those have found their way into various subs over the last 3 years without any of us knowing it came from DFV. The steam he screenshot has been spoken about a lot this morning but it seems to come from one of his youtube streams when GME last broke $30.
Hope you enjoyed these takes.
Love ya DFV
submitted by forest-of-ewood to Superstonk [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 13:40 _Sleepy_Blob_ I wish I could just have a hobby:/

This is going to be long so👍 I've been trying to have hobbies, for a very long time. When I was very young my favorite hobby was writing stories I used to do it constantly, overtime I just got over it. I figured oh well that's normal for kids, their interests are always changing. I tried playing the keyboard, learned a couple of songs then never played. Then I started playing basketball, I ended up only playing with friends at school, and once I did online school I stopped playing. I skate boarded, rollerbladed and rode all kinds of diffrent skate stuff because it was something my mom was into, tho I only did it for her I still call it a hobby because I kept up with it for about 4 years. That stopped as I got lazy and honestly frustrated with it over time. And idk every since that time I've noticed things more.. how complicated things have become for me. I tried working out, only lasted 4 weeks I took a long break then tried it again, but again I didint do it for very long. "I guess I'm just super lazy", so I try to do something creative. Crafts I cant do at all, when I was little I used to be able to, but now when I'm making decorations with family I cant even finish one thing because I'm obsessed with making things perfect, and get genuinely distressed and tired working on things. I tried drawing, and I've hardly done it because again I'm very picky, it's very draining and I hardly have the energy. I feel like I'm missing a big part of me, when people introduce themselves one of the first things they say about are their hobbies. Meanwhile I'm like "Oh uh idk I just kinda do whatever.. funny thing I dont even really know much about myself so..." I've always struggled with defining who I am, even when I was a little kid. I told my mom I wanted to do online school and convinced her I hated in person school because I knew that's what she wanted, I let her pick out clothes for me because I was afraid to be judged. She decorated my room, I told her I liked stitch (from Lilio&Stitch) and I dont even remember the movie💀, when people ask about my goals I cant think of any so I come up with some lame joke "I want to marry a rich man, who can buy me lots of weed", I have no friends because I cant hold relationships, and I'm not doing anything special with my life. Idk who I am... I'm just a person who is just there, I basically feel like a NPC tbh. I have a void inside me that is always just there and I fucking hate it, I want to feel passionate about something, to have something that gives me a sense of identity. I wish I could just do what so many people do so easily, ik as a high schooler I'm not supposed to have things figured out but idk this just seems ridiculous😭. I'm aware this is probadly some mental shit, but due to multiple reasons I cant get diagnosed or any meds or anything so I just get to suffer ig, yay me🤷🏼‍♀️
submitted by _Sleepy_Blob_ to Vent [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 12:03 samochips Finally found someone that I really liked and then she ended it.

I'm a 28-year-old man who moved to a new city three years ago, ending my relationship with my long-term girlfriend. I've been dating frequently since then, initially casually, but more recently with the intention of finding a lasting relationship. I've been on dates with around 60 different women, most of them only once, and some for 5+ dates, but not many have sparked my interest enough to pursue further.
-LONG POST- A few weeks ago, I reinstalled Tinder and matched with a woman (A) of the same age. Her profile was managed by her best friend (B) as she couldn't be bothered. B and I chatted briefly before A took over. We discovered that we were going to the same club that weekend, so we decided to meet there. Both A and B are hilarious and we talk for maybe an hour or so outside. One of the things we talk about is dating and she tells me she came out of a 7 year long relationship last summer and has only been on 3 dates since, one of them which ended up being catastrophic but a fun story. I also met some more of A's friends who seemed to approve of me as they’d seen my profile too, they told me that they hoped they’d see me again. We all say goodbye and me and A keep talking through Tinder. Everything feels great and her friends have already met and veto:ed me! Next week me and B finally meet one-on-one and holy shit, everything feels so extremely natural. She’s funny, empathetic and easy-going. Coming from my own dating experiences I realized quite quickly that this is something special, I’d never felt things going this well before as she was so easy to talk to. Apparently she had turned 29 the day before. We grabbed some beers at different bars until late evening where we walked back to the metro. On the way we stopped at a viewing point with an amazing night view of the city and kissed for a bit there. I told her I had a really nice feeling about her and she said likewise. I had a smile on my face going back home. After saying goodbye I messaged her on Tinder and asked for her number which she was happy to give me and we continued on the convo there.
We had been talking clothes/fashion shortly during the first date and she asked me couple of days later if we were going to do the shopping date as a next date to which I responded “Sure! If you think that sounds fun. Or I could cook you some food?” to which she said something like “Yes let’s do it! Let’s save the dinner at home for another time, although it sounds amazing!”. We scheduled for Friday the same week and we kept talking throughout the whole week through text with good banter.
Friday comes and we meet up for some shopping. I had gotten her a nicer chocolate as a late birthday gift, something inexpensive but thoughtful. She loved it. We go to several stores and also a sports store as she needed to look at some cycling gear. It felt like we were really good friends and that we had known each other for longer that we actually had. After an hour or two she wanted to grab a beer as she was exhausted and I suggested a nearby bar but we ended up going to my office since it has a nice terrace to enjoy the sunset at. I grabbed us couple of beers and we just sat the rest of the evening talking about everything, getting to know each other further. At one point, she facetimed B and we all talked a bit. I asked B jokingly “When am I going to be seeing you again?” to which A asked me “What are you doing tomorrow? I’m hosting a late birthday celebration”. I responded that I was going to a dinner with a friend but then no further plans. She said “Let’s talk tomorrow and see”. Later during the evening we both opened up a bit more. She works as a nurse and did that during Covid and talked about the first time she saw people die and how hard it was on her. I felt like she was very comfortable sharing her thoughts, but that might've been because that's what she's used to in her earlier relationship? We kissed a lot too during the evening, which she seem to enjoy and also initiate. we even fondled each other a bit but it didn’t go further than that since we weren’t at home. I pointed out when we were talking that I felt it was nice that she was talking in a way that implicitly meant that she thought we were going to continue seeing each other. And she responded with that I do it too. At last, she said she was tired and we decided to call it quits and kissed goodbye.
Come Saturday, we text a bit and I ask her during the evening how the party’s going. She responds an hour later that she didn’t have her phone and she’s been busy but everything’s going great and she asks how we’re doing. I respond and also ask her if me and my friend could maybe come over? Another late respond and she tells us that tonight might not be a good time, wishing me a good night. A bit bummed but i realized it might’ve been early for me to join in on a party like that with her close friends even though I met most of them already at the club we met at.
Sunday and we text sporadically about our day, I ask her on Monday if she’d like to take a picnic in the sun after work on Wednesday and she responds that “She’s been thinking during the weekend and feels like she’s not emotionally ready to keep seeing me. Which sucks because I’m great in so many ways but she wanted to say it early to not drag me along.”
I was a bit surprised and saddened by this, but also confused. My female friends suggested that perhaps things were moving too fast and that my openness about my feelings might have scared her away. Like f.e me saying things like “I have a good feeling about you.”, “It feels like we’ve known each other for longer than we actually have” and generally formulating sentences in a way that indicates that I want to keep seeing her. I thought I was paying her compliments and showing my seriousness towards her. It’s hard for me to not overanalyze the final date, if it was something that I said or did (or did not do), but I know that doesn’t really help me. In hindsight, I probably liked her more (and showed that) than she did me, even though she liked my company.
I talked to my therapist briefly about it and she kind of confirmed my suspicions but also told me that she probably has a totally different reference frame when it comes to dating and that she might’ve gotten scared as she has barely seen what options are out there. She didn’t think it was impossible that A might reach out to me but advised me to lay low for a month or two and maybe then shoot her a text and ask how she’s doing in an attempt to rekindle things maybe.
What are your thoughts about all of this?
submitted by samochips to dating_advice [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 11:59 Insignificant_Fish My sisters entitlement nearly sent me over the edge

I (22f) have a twin sister (non identical). We both live at home, I'm pursuing a bachelor in science and she's working. She recently bought her first house with her boyfriend and will be moving out soon, which honestly I am SO happy about.
She treats our dad like a personal assistent. She expects him to drive her places, thinks she's entitled to his car whenever she needs it, makes him clean up her mess, and worst of all - made him pitch in for her house. Houses are expensive, so I get that you'd ask your parents if they could help when they're better off than you are, but it's the way she just thought this was evident. She literally picked a house over budget, before asking him if he'd support her financially, and expected him to just pay the difference. She never helps with any householding either, and when asked to gets offended. Our parents go on vacation every once in a while, and it leaves me with all the household work. I asked her to do the dishes ONCE in an entire week, and she complained to my parents that I made her do all the work. Meanwhile, I cleaned the entire house, the bathrooms, watered the garden, cooked, did laundry, did the dishes on all the other days, fed the cat, cleaned the litterbox, took out the trash... and I have exams in a week.
And she is. so. hotdamn. boring.
Despite being twins, we have nothing in common. She has not a single interesting hobby, or even remotely unique interest. It's like if you asked AI to create the most basic human being in the world. She won't eat anything besides potatoes, meat and some veggies. She doesn't listen to any music besides the latest pop hits. She only watches the most crappy tv shows. And on top of all of it, she is just plain stupid. You can not have a conversation with her about anything more complicated than the weather. This is no exaggeration, we literally only talk about the weather. I've tried art, music, movies, literature, philosophy, science, politics, memes... She has no opinions on anything. She does not understand jokes of any kind, and has never said anything funny in her life. I don't even hate her or dislike her for it, it just baffles me. It's like living with a cardboard cutout.
Sorry, I don't really hate her per se, but I just needed to, well, get this off my chest.

submitted by Insignificant_Fish to offmychest [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 06:03 ByMyDecree Reviewing and Ranking Every Battle: Bruce Banner vs. Bruce Jenner

Tier List: https://imgur.com/a/8uZCpGy
Oh boy, is this one gonna be a can of worms. Let's dive in headfirst!
"I'll school you in this battle of the baddest Bruce, with your He-Man haircut and your Daisy Dukes." It's an unremarkable line, but the rhythm here is pretty kickass, and I love the choregraphy of Jenner doing stretches in time with the beat, it's a really satisfying visual. "I hear you're good at running, you're just like the Flash. Especially in the 100-meter ditch-your-wife dash." Decent attack. They never fail to use someone getting divorced as material for a diss, do they? Banner looming over his beakers and microscope is a nice visual, and "You turned one gold medal to a lifetime of green; the most overrated athlete anyone's ever seen" is a competent enough attack. "You need to carry fatherhood across that finish line; kept up with the Kardashians but left some kids behind" is, again, a decent enough diss. A lot of material about Jenner's family here; I guess that's to be expected. There's still one or two much more obvious lines of attack to make, but I suppose Banner is just saving his best stuff for the end, right? He certainly wasn't saving it for the end of this verse, in which he just references the fact that he transforms when he gets pissed off without fashioning it into much of an attack or boast. The use of strings in the music here is a really nice touch, although I'd say the green screen effect with Bruce standing in front of those neurons or whatever ain't looking so hot.
Actually, the green screen effects for this battle broadly aren't the best. That stadium Jenner's standing in is looking pretty low-res. "I think you're in your element when you're behaving badly; honestly you're kind of boron when you're happy." It's a corny pun, but the sentiment is true enough. "I'll lap and pass your ass ten different ways. Decathlon athlete blast through you like some gamma rays." This is filler; it's fine, rhythm sounds pretty good, but it's just taking up space. "The truth is there's no truce between the Bruces, you're a drifter being useless, I'm a winner, no excuses!" That's a lot of playing on the same rhyme in a short period of time, and I dig that: truth/truce/Bruces/useless/excuses, hell yeah. I guess some of those aren't proper rhymes so much as, what's the word... assonance, maybe? It's good writing, is the point. The visuals panning in and out of this home gym is a nice touch too, and a nice parallel to Banner's sequence with his lab. "Beatiful women all up on my jock, I got a home gym, check me on the cereal box, Doc!" The rhythm Jenner's spitting here rules, this beat is low-key one of the better ones they've done. It's also a nice boast, and that Wheaties visual is pretty great. "You big green freak, don't try to flex; if it wasn't for your cousin, you'd never have sex!" Okay, this line goes super hard and I think it's one of the most underrated ones in ERB history. AND it's got one of the funniest visuals in the way Jenner pops in on that roller shouting "OHH!" while Banner suffers. That bit lives rent-free in my head. "You're so strong when you get mad, too bad you can't go back to protect your mom from your dad!" Holy fucking SHIT, this goes hard! The flow here kicks all kinds of ass, and we've got a 3x rhyme combo going on with mad/bad/dad; I LOVE odd numbers of rhymes! It's also just an extremely savage low blow. Another line that doesn't get enough credit. Jenner is kicking Banner's ass so far.
One questionable and inadvisable transformation sequence later, The Hulk comes in to spit a few bars. But only a few. "That painted face don't give you class; just one more thing Bruce do for cash!" Interesting argument. "Best thing you make? Kylie ass! She eighteen? Hulk SMASH!!" I do think this is a pretty funny way to reduce Jenner's legacy to Kardashian bullshit, and the Hulk SMASH joke always gets a strong reaction out of people.
Fully transitioned Caitlin Jenner comes in with "That's my teenage daughter, man, I have to forbid this; I'll put a javelin through your jolly green discus." Decent lines. Good way for Caitlin Jenner to brag about her athletic achievements while also throwing a Jolly Green Giant jab in. "Kylie not the kinda girl I'm gonna let you smash on; you'll get the medal without the decathlon!" I like the medeal/metal wordplay here, although Caitlin Jenner dual-wielding pistols and firing them at the Hulk feels extremely out of left field.
"Hulk is Hulk! No identify as man! Me thinks Cait might understand!" Pretty funny line, and Caitlin's reaction is also amusing. "No gender issue; this Jenner issue! Just you being you is enough to diss you!" So that's it, then? They're really not going to bring that one thing up, eh? I feel like that closing line would land a lot better if they did.
"Look I understand that you hate yourself; but you don't need to blame yourself." Oh, huh. That's different. Let's see where this therapy session goes. "You're a tiger, stop trying to tame yourself; you gotta be big enough to contain yourself." Well... I like that she's mixing things up by rhyming with the penultimate word instead of the last word, that's always something. They're clearly going for an angle of Caitlin relating to Bruce and trying to teach him to come to terms with his identity, which is kind of cute, I guess. "Be green, it ain't none of my business!" That line's pretty funny, as is the tea-sipping visual. "But if you think you're looking good in those torn-ass clothes; you're lying, which means you need a new wardrobe!" That's a reference to The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, which has absolutely nothing to do with this matchup. Feels out of place because of it. And it's not a very strong diss besides, feels like padding. Doubly strange to end her verse on it. "The visions of those shorts kinda scarred me; what'd you just rage at a Barney themed party?" Oh, there's more? Alright. This burn is really lame. Barney jokes? Come aaaaaaaahhhhhn, what are we doing here? That line should have definitely been left on the cutting room floor. "That's probably not something you seen as a child; not one day did you see your daddy smile!" Okay. She already established that Hulk's father was abusive in her first verse, and while it was a powerful blow there, here it feels much more toothless. "Hulk not strong enough to deal with denial! Laying you down easy; that's kitchen tile!" The first line is pretty amusing with how Caitlin imitates The Hulk's speech, but that second line... why? Pretty weaksauce way to finish her performance off, but whatever. Also not a fan of these visuals with the diamonds, feels like they wanted to add some visual flair but couldn't think of a good way to do it so they settled on Caitlin popping out of diamonds which is just odd. "Examine this under your microscope; you've got no neck, but you still fucking choked!" Oh. This verse is still going? Okay. Well, it's a good line. "After battling me, you're gonna always be pissed! So the Hulk will stay forever, neither Bruce will exist!" You know, that's actually a pretty strong closer, but I can't help but feel like it's undercut by just how long that verse was dragging on.
Okay, so. I feel it should be pointed out that there's a lot of people who were always going to hate this battle for making the decision not to attack Caitlin for being trans. Furthermore, the overwhelming sentiment has been that Banner won this; it bears keeping in mind that there's a lot of transphobes out there who were going to say the Hulk won no matter what happened simply because Caitlin is trans. So to that end, I think that a fair amount of the hate this battle gets, and the hate that Caitlin's performance gets, is bullshit. But there are still some big criticisms that need to be made.
So let's be honest: they threw the match for Caitlin. Or at least attempted to. You might still think the Hulk managed to win, but with that insanely long final verse it's pretty clear they tried to make Caitlin the 'canon' winner, as with Thomas Jefferson vs. Frederick Douglass. They did this presumably because it was pride month, and they wanted to say Trans Rights with a trans rapper that gets a positive portrayal. I can get behind that sentiment, but the execution is questionable to say the least.
Like... I'm not trans, but there's some shitty stuff going on here that's easy to see. For one, the cardinal rule that everybody knows is that you're not supposed to misgendedeadname a trans person, and the title of this battle is Bruce Banner vs. Bruce Jenner. So from the get-go, before the video even starts playing, we're getting some mixed signals here. Are we to take from this that they made the tactical decision to go ahead and deadname Caitlin for the sake of the matchup making intuitive sense(what with it obviously being a play on their similar names), and then try and do a hard pivot and make Caitlin win the battle to avoid criticism for that decision? Feels like maybe they could have just not gone with this matchup instead. The whole transformation element also seems dubious, but I could see someone reasonably landing either way on whether that's actually an issue or just silly fun, so I won't go into that.
Another issue to consider: Caitlin Jenner kind of sucks. Most people do not like her. Most TRANS people don't even like her. For one, despite the fact that she's trans, she is a Republican who has made anti-gay marriage comments in the past. The bizarre shittiness of a trans person being like that is a pretty ripe source of material for disses, yet this battle does not bring it up at all. And more notably than that, Caitlin Jenner was famously involved with a manslaughter case, where she was accused of getting someone killed due to negligent driving. It was ultimately determined that there wasn't enough evidence for manslaughter and so she wasn't found guilty(though it's widely believed that this decision was bullshit and she did commit manslaughter), but it's an extremely well-known and controversial factoid and it's insane they didn't have Banner bring up as a diss. If you're going to have a rapper make the case of "Just you being you is enough to diss you", seems like being a trans Republican and quite possibly committing vehicular manslaughter are the two strongest and most obvious points to go with. And yet... nothing. If your goal to make a battle that gives trans people positive representation, then Caitlin Jenner is a pretty poor choice. If you don't want your trans rapper to look like a bad person, then maybe instead of ignoring either elephant in the room, you could just go with some other trans rapper in some other matchup. I get that there aren't a lot of choices for a trans rep with name recognition or ample material to work with, but... the Wachowski sisters are right there. And they've done more to warrant getting in an ERB than Caitlin Jenner anyhow.
Another thing is... why is it a moral imperative that Caitlin win this battle? Sure she's trans, and it's cool to want to give trans people positive representation, but you didn't need to give her an absurdly long verse at the end to do that. You could just give her good writing, refrain from shitting on her just for being trans, and sure, let her have the final word. Then, yes, show the pride flag at the end to say Trans Rights. That's all you had to do. With something like Jefferson v. Douglass the scale-tipping made sense, because it was a slave-owner vs. a slave. Yeah, it's kind of hard for the slave-owner to win that match, and it makes sense to use it as a vehicle to take a firm stand against slavery. But it's not like this battle is Trans Person vs. Transphobe; Bruce Banner isn't some horrible person that must be morally condemned(there's a much stronger case for Caitlin herself), so... why have it play out like this? I think that ironically, by trying to hand the match to Caitlin they wound up getting more hate thrown towards the performance and more people voting against her in polls than there otherwise would have been if they'd just cut out all that excessive padding and given her a solid closing verse. As-is the verse isn't good, the overall quality is dragged down by just how much fluff there is.
In the end, my read on the situation is this: for whatever reason, they really liked the idea of this matchup and wanted to go through with it. They knew that going through with it would necessitate making it Bruce Banner vs. Bruce Jenner at the start, so they bit the bullet on the deadnaming and the conceit for the matchup and did everything they could to mitigate the potential backlash for that, going as soft on Caitlin as possible and giving her a verse that was ridiculously lengthy. People always say "but it's the Hulk, it makes sense he wouldn't say much!" and sure, I can buy that as an excuse as to why Caitlin's verse would be longER than his, but that still doesn't account for why it's as insanely long as it is. In any case... this paragraph is just speculation, I can't know their actual motivations, but I think this is likely what happened.
Anyway... despite all, this battle gets way too much hate. I think Jenner's first verse is really good, and the Hulk is also quite solid for as few lines as he gets. Bruce Banner is a little mediocre and Caitlin's last verse ends up just being a pain in the ass to sit through(could've been good if they cut all the fat and left in the handful of good lines) that's best skipped past on repeat listens. But still... there's some stuff here that is thoroughly enjoyable. I don't think this battle quite manages to be good, but it's got enough going for it that I think it manages to avoid being outright bad. I'm putting this in the top of C tier, because I genuinely think it's more enjoyable than all of the battles that are below it.
It's understandable to say that The Hulk beat Jenner's second verse, but I think her first verse was pretty fire and the highlight of the battle. I say she edges out a win, but a case could be made either way.
Let me end things off by saying this: I once watched this battle with an extremely transphobic relative, and he was pissed off by that "no gender issue, this Jenner issue" line. So even if this battle was a regrettable mistake, at least they did something right.
submitted by ByMyDecree to ERB [link] [comments]


2024.05.16 04:47 Haha_ADHD_go_brrrrrr 28 [M4F] #Louisiana or #Online - Cute nerd with lost puppy energy seeking life partner!

And I'm not just a cute nerd because I'm serious and sudden onset! badum tiss
I'm also a 5'7'' sorta thin white dude with long black hair, and I think that's kinda neat. I'm big into PC gaming, not that you have to be, but if you are, it's something that I'd love to do together! My interests also extend to things like Pokemon, anime, a couple books (Kingkiller Chronicles is GREAT), and I have a peace lily named Alphinaud! I am quite introverted, so I've always found it hard to make friends, even over the internet. Still, I have a lot of love to give, storing it all inside this rock I've been living under, and just looking for the right person to give it all to.
The kind of person I'm looking for is mostly just someone that genuinely enjoys my company. I want someone that will laugh at all of my stupid jokes, or at least the funny ones. Body type isn't super important to me either, bodybuilder, BBW, or anything in between, its always been more about the person inside, to me. I want someone super affectionate, caring, and gentle with me. Someone who can take the lead, too! I once spent five minutes in the breakfast aisle paralyzed about what cereal to get. I want someone I can fall in love with, to say "good morning" and "good night" to every day, someone I am excited to wake up and see next to me, give me that fairy tale love that everyone craves but few people find!
• Could be talked into DMing for you and your friends
• I still have not seen the Lord of the Rings movies
• I am absolutely full of dumb, awful jokes
• Once, I built a forge out of an old bbq grill and give hobby blacksmithing a try!
• I know how to solve a rubik's cube! Not particularly fast, mind you, but I can!
So yeah, I guess that's it? If any of this has interested you, any of it at all, don't hesitate to drop me a message or PM! I'm happy to move to discord whenever, and I'm also okay with exchanging pics once we've chatted a little. Thanks for reading, and have a great evening!
submitted by Haha_ADHD_go_brrrrrr to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]


http://swiebodzin.info