Spoilers for Season 7
All For One steals Explosion and renders Bakugo quirkless. He tells Shigaraki to play the waiting game. Let Bakugo wear himself out, and the feeling of helplessness will sink in. While All Might still finds All For One's location, Shigaraki drags Bakugo through the portal. He intends to follow his master's advice faithfully.
For months, Bakugo is locked up in solitary confinement. The League feeds him, but he has no entertainment in the dusty old room. He tries to escape dozens of times, but he keeps failing. He can't learn to function without his quirk and has no resources.
Eventually, the League moves on to the next stage of their plan. They wanted to give Bakugo a taste of their lifestyle. Occasionally, they escort him outside and force him to witness their crimes. Even as a quirkless person, they still bind him and place a tracker on him.
Bakugo almost gets killed in the crossfire as the League clashes with other criminals. He gets frustrated and can't defend himself. At the same time, he is disgusted by the new villains he encounters, like the Creature Rejection Clan. They almost make the League look good in comparison.
He wants to punch the supremacists in the face, but his restraints won't allow him. This leads to the first turning point. Shigaraki sees that Bakugo shares a common enemy and encourages his anger. He offers to briefly take off his restraints, so he could beat to the supremacists up. Bakugo found himself increasingly in the same scenario and being tempted by it.
Despite his efforts to be patient, Shigaraki was not All For One. He was finding Bakugo's conversion to be too slow. So, he decided to make a bold move. When Bakugo returned to his cell, Twice and Toga used their quirks to create his imposter. The League used this imposter to frame Bakugo for various crimes and created fake evidence for his "new villainy".
The League attampted to make it believable, such as the clone only doing minor crimes and still acting disrespectful. They created the narrative that Bakugo was slowly warming up to the League and willing to be their lookout. The public was split on whether it was genuine or fake. As a precaution, the authorities promised to investigate and arrest Bakugo for questioning. The possibility for a false prosecution was suddenly on the tables.
Bakugo's escape plan had become far more complicated. Simultaneously, he needed to find an opportunity to slip away from the League and gather evidence for his innocence. After much thought, he decided Toga or Twice was his best bet. If he could drag them to authorities and make them confess to framing him, he would be home free.
However, his plan wouldn't be easy. The League were constantly putting themselves in harm's way. It was a challenge to simply keep Toga and Twice alive. Mostly recently, Shigaraki had gotten into a losing battle with Gigantomachia. Bakugo could do little but try not to get crushed.
After being the giant's ragdoll, he finally had enough. Bakugo called them idiots and said their strategies were impractical. He didn't want to help his kidnappers but he was tired of getting hurt. He came up with a plan to defeat Gigantomachia. Despite some progress, they couldn't land the finishing blow.
Doctor Ujiko offered Bakugo a minor quirk so he wouldn't feel useless. Begrudgingly, he agreed. He was given "pain killer"; a quirk he could only project onto someone else. Like its namesake, it gives the target an adrenaline rush and numbs their senses. The doctor ensured it was a support quirk, so Bakugo had to rely on his teammates. With this small advantage, the League finally defeated Gigantomachia.
However, it was short-lived. The Liberation Army soon challenged the League, and Bakugo had to do it all over again. Relying on the League for survival, the boy had to accept them as comrades. He protected Toga during the battle, as he needed her alive to prove his innocence. However, Curious was determined to kill her. As the journalist monologued about quirk counselling, Bakugo saw a human side to Toga for the first time.
He was shaken further when Toga transformed into Uraraka. Rationally, he knew what he was seeing, but his emotions got the best of him. He rushed to help "Urakaka" as Curious had her on the brink of death. He used pain killer on Curious in overdrive. She had too much adrenaline and ended up becoming dizzy. This allowed Toga to use Zero Gravity and kill her. Bakugo was stunned, never intending to be an accomplice to murder.
Eventually, the League was victorious and joined forces with the Army. As propaganda experts, the League allowed the Liberation to take over Bakugo's conversion. He was treated "better", like being given a small apartment. However, he was still supervised 24/7 and not allowed any communications. At their ideology was more convincing than Shigaraki's vague ideas, such as people having more freedom to use their quirks.
The Army members played to Bakugo's insecurities about his quirklessness and need to be a strong hero. They argued heroes were simply government agents and that didn't inherently make them the good guys. Even All Might lied to the public and hid how weak he was.
The Army promised Ujiko could give him an offensive quirk if he promised to do "small jobs" for them, such as helping out with training sessions for army members. Like Shigaraki, Bakugo was placed into a tank to undergo surgery. Ujiko removed the painkiller quirk and replace it with his new quirk.
However, he didn't tell Bakugo that he reserved landmine from Curious's body. He placed the explosive ability into him, as he wanted to remind Bakugo that he was a killer and "no different from the League".
Additionally, the doctor secretly placed the second power of self-destruct. Like Lady Nagant, Bakugo could be killed if he tried leaking the League's secrets.
During the raid, Bakugo was woken up from suspended animation. He saw the heroes fighting in the distance and considered running for it. At this point, All For One had possessed Shigaraki. He blackmailed Bakugo into staying.
He explained his self-destruct quirk. Then, he threatened to fly over and decay UA High if Bakugo didn't come with him. Witnessing Shigaraki destroy whole cities, he obeyed. Together, they flew to Tartarus prison, and Bakugo simply watched the chaos. He didn't know what else to do. All For One praised him for finally understanding the stakes.
After Japan's collapse, Bakugo was technically given "freedom of movement" for the first time. But due to his other quirk, he still had to follow orders. On top of that, his landmine quirk wasn't ideal. He needed to prepare ahead of time and people to act as his bodyguards. In the end, he still relied on the League in battle.
Once, he numbly asked All For One to switch out landmine for explosion. However, the top villain laughed, saying that was unnecessary. He claimed he already had an explosive ability and he could be satisfied with that. Sarcastically, All For One said landmine made Bakugo a teamplayer and he taught him something his teachers failed to do.
Finally, the League got Bakugo to do their dirty work. All For One sent him to take down villains threatening the League's agenda. Even if the mastermind freed them, he knew not every inmate was grateful and wanted power for themselves. Even in his circumstances, Bakugo tried to act as a vigilante.
He kept his enemies alive so the police could arrest them later. However, Bakguo had been desensitised to violence and could get carried away. On top of that, his enemies were the worst of the worst; murderers, terrorists and rapists. On one or two occasions, Bakugo lost his temper and killed someone. He found a twisted championship with Dabi, as they were apathetic to their teammates and happy to mow down lowlifes. Dabi's blue flames were the closest thing to seeing an explosion in action again.
As the heroes put pressure on the League, All For One's fanatic followers became desperate. They heard how Curious had previously used Landmine. It could allow them to martyr themselves, whether to avoid capture or kill someone as a last resort. At first, Bakugo refuses to use landmine on a person. However, he became nervous about triggering self-destruct. He convinced himself he didn't care if these scum died, and they asked for it.
During the final battle, Bakugo has to fight his old classmates. He spends ages trying not to hurt them but not trigger self-destruct at the same time. Eventually, he makes his main target, Ayoma. After discovering he was the UA traitor, Bakugo is a whirlwind of emotions. He personally understands being threatened by All For One and being quirkless. However, he still couldn't get over the unfairness of one thing. Ayoma got to live safe and cosy in the UA Dorms - Meanwhile, Bakugo was stuck on the street, needing to rely on killers to survive.
Ayoma begged Bakugo to direct his anger at him and leave their classmates alone. The blonde boy eagerly agrees, badly injuring the UA traitor. Eventually, Bakugo feels disgusted at himself for torturing Ayoma and tries to figure something out. Finally, he realises a loophole in his self-destruct quirk. He can't outright leak the League's secrets, but a loss of will and someone else defeating him wasn't enough to be a betrayal. He lets himself get distracted, and 1-A knocks him out.
Everyone feels terrible for Bakugo being kidnapped and failing to save him. However, he had killed one too many people. He still needed to be arrested and held at trial. Due to his overwhelming factors, Bakugo was given a reduced prison sentence and mandatory therapy.
Credit to u/gayboat87 for their suggestions.

While it is generally known that T-Mobile Park is a defensive ballpark, I think we sleep on how much of a defensive park it is. We complain as fans all the time about the general lack of offense for Mariners teams, and we’ve generally had great pitching. That identity has been attached to the Mariners culture for years.
I’m beginning to wonder though if T-Mobile Park has just become that much of a deterrent for offense. Bad pitchers come into T-Mobile and suddenly find their groove whether it be as a starter or a reliever. Good hitters are stifled as well as we’ve seen from some of the talent that has come here just to deteriorate (Winker, Polanco, Garver).
Here are some statistics to help show this:
Per Baseball Savant, with a three year rolling average the Mariners are last in the MLB in terms of park factors with a rating of 92. For perspective the next lowest is 95 (Padres and Mets), and the two highest are 112 (Rockies) and 107 (Red Sox). Also, a 100 is considered average per their model. The fact that the Mariners have the second largest differential from average is notable.
Team Hitting Splits last three years using tOPS (a player’s average OPS relative to their season total) and sOPS (relative to the league average splits OPS). Note these are not park adjusted. 100 is also considered average for these statistics.
22: Home - 95 / 91 Away - 105 / 108
23: Home - 94 / 91 Away - 106 / 109
24: Home - 96 / 85 Away - 104 / 96
Team Pitching Splits last three years using ERA.
22: Home - 3.26 Away - 3.94
23: Home - 3.42 Away - 4.07
24: Home - 2.61 Away - 4.37
Overall, we can definitely see that the team has been consistently below average offensively at home while performing better on the road. Of course, the inverse has been true as well for the team with their pitching being consistently good at home while being average to below average on the road.
Whether this is a good or bad thing, it remains to be seen. However, I would much rather have this kind of problem than what Coors Field has. I just believe that we may need to temper our expectations for what this team can do offensively now and maybe in the future. A given is that this team needs to get better there regardless this year. They’re not even close to being better than the offenses from the last two years relative to themselves or rest of the MLB.
I guess my questions for you all are why is this the case? I do believe in the marine layer hypothesis, and I think that the architecture of the ball park swirls the wind. I don’t really have evidence to support those claims though. The depth of the park probably isn’t a factor given it’s league average in that category. Other than that, I’m not really sure.
I just wanted to look at this because we do put a lot of pressure on the team to be better offensively, and maybe we shouldn’t because they may just be bad at scoring runs at home anyway. However, we don’t have the luxury of leaning on our pitching on the road, so we need to be at least average offensively on the road. The Mariners need to make sure their pitching can be dominant anywhere though. It’s critical with the deadline approaching that they improve holistically. Improving JUST the offense may be a fool’s errand even though they need help. Does this information change your opinion about the deadline?
TLDR: T-Mobile syphons offense while improving pitching. Good or bad long term?

Our primary source for time travel in the Mario canon is Mario & Luigi: Partners in Time, since it explores the concept of time travel in the most depth out of all the games. Other games involving time travel as plot points are Yoshi's Island DS, Yoshi's New Island, and Mario's Time Machine (the latter of which isn't canon). Dr. Mario World, as well as any Mario Kart or Mario sports-games featuring Baby Mario alongside adult Mario imply some sort of time travel involved. To understand how time travel works in the Mario universe, we first need to examine how Time Holes, the primary means of time travel in Partners in Time, work.

How Time Holes Connect Two Points in Time

Time Holes don't lead to a fixed point in time. If they did, the following examples would happen:

• Mario & Luigi travel to Yoshi's Island through the Time Hole leading there. They destroy Sunnycide, deactivate Yoob, and retrieve the Cobalt Star Shards. They return to the present using the same Time Hole. If they jumped into the same Time Hole again, they sequence would effectively be reset: Sunnycide still exists, Yoob is still online, and the Cobalt Star Shard is still in Baby Bowser's. This duplicates the Shards, creating a time paradox. If there is only a single timeline, it also duplicates Mario & Luigi (effectively creating 4 more Bros with each repeat visit), making them meet each other.
• Mario & Luigi travel through a Time Hole from the present to the past. When they return from there, they would emerge from the Time Hole in Peach's Castle of the present immediately after entering it, since no time passes in the present while they are in the past. This is not implied to be the case, as Professor Elvin Gadd usually remarks when the bros return that some amount of time has passed ("Hey now! Back at last!", "About time you boys showed!"). The shop in Peach's Castle also stocks up on wares periodically, implying that time needs to pass between shippings.
• Mario & Luigi travel to Toadwood Forest through the Time Hole leading there. They get their Cobalt Star Shards stolen by Baby Bowser, who escapes to Yoshi's Island. Mario & Luigi return to the present and travel to Yoshi's Island through the Time Hole leading there. If all Time Holes connect to the same point in time, Baby Bowser is still at Toadwood Forest and not on Yoshi's Island when Mario & Luigi arrive there.

From this we can infer that Time Holes do not lead to a fixed point in time. Rather, they seem to connect two points in time, but these points are still affected by the same flow of time. This means that the same amount of time passes in the past and present. Let me demonstrate with another example:

• Mario & Luigi travel through a Time Hole from the present to the past. In the present, the date is November 28, 2005, and the Time Hole sends them back exactly 20 years. They arrive in the past on November 28, 1985. They spend 2 days there, until November 30, 1985, before returning to the present through the Time Hole. They arrive in the present on November 30, 2006, as the same two days have passed in the present while they were away in the past.

This eliminates the previous errors that would arise with Time Holes connecting to fixed points in time and adds up with what we see in the game. Time Holes don't lead to a fixed point in time. Rather, they send anything that passes through them to a point in time relative to the point in time when the Time Hole was entered, the amount of time travelled through being fixed. I propose to call this fixed amount of time travelled through the Time Hole the Time Hole's depth (THd). The Time Hole from the above example would then be 20 years deep.
We can assume that Professor E. Gadd's time machine works by opening its own Time Holes, travelling through them, and then closing them again. This is supported by E. Gadd stating that the Time Holes used by Mario & Luigi in the game have appeared due to the time machine's return tearing holes in the time continuum. These Time Holes seems to be equal in depth to the time hole initially opened by the time machine at the start of the game, and it's reasonable to assume the machine can be used to set the depth of a the Time Holes it opens, at least as long as it is powered by the Cobalt Star. When E. Gadd appears in the past with the time machine after Mario & Luigi defeat Elder Princess Shroob, he states that he has "engineered it to run off energy from the time holes", raising the possibility that it can only open Time Holes equal in depth to the already existing Time Holes while not powered by the Cobalt Star.

How Temporal Interference Affects Causality

Now that we've cleared up how Time Holes connect two points in time, we start trying to explain how time travellers from the present can change the present by interfering with the past. For this, we look at how E. Gadd's memories are rearranged after the eruption of Thwomp Volcano. Mario & Luigi put out a fire in E. Gadd of the past's lab using the Baby Pump technique. Past E. Gadd witnessing this event leads E. Gadd's memories to be rearranged. The E. Gadd of the present notices this a THd after the event happens. Present E. Gadd then invents the Hydrogush 4000 as a result.
Thus, Mario & Luigi cause the course of history to change with their actions in the past. In a fixed timeline, changing the course of history is not possible, so the only options left are a dynamic timeline or a multiverse. However, since time travel in PiT is limited by the depth of the Time Holes linking the past and present, there is another parameter to factor in. It is generally assumed that when the course of history is changed, that change takes place immediately and universally. However, since time continues to pass at the same rate in the past as in the present, the change might also take place in real time over the depth of the Time Hole. This presents us with four possibilities for how a change in the course of history affects the present:

	Change in course of history doesn't create an alternate universe	Change in course of history creates an alternate universe
Course of history is changed immediately and universally	A: The present and everyone's memory is adjusted as if the course of history had always been as changed.	B: The course of history and the present in the original universe are unchanged. The present and everyone's memory in the alternate universe is according to the changed course of history.
Course of history is changed only at the point in time when its cause happened, taking place in real time from this point, until the past catches up to the present	C: The present and everyone's memory is adjusted over time relative to the THd and according to the state of the course of history.	D: The course of history and the present in the original universe are unchanged. The present in the alternate universe does not yet exist.

Comparing these possibilities, we can compare them to what happens in the game and rule out three of the four possibilities.

• Possibility A would cause present E. Gadd to be unaware that his memories have been rearranged, because he would not be able to remember a time where his memories hadn't yet been rearranged. This can be ruled out because E. Gadd is aware of his memories having been rearranged.
• Possibility B would cause the memoires of present E. Gadd in the alternate universe to be the same as in possibility A, which has been ruled out.
• Possibility B and D would cause the memoires of present E. Gadd in the original universe to be unchanged. This can be ruled out because E. Gadd's memories are changed.
• Possibility D would cause present E. Gadd in the alternate universe to not yet exist.

This only leaves possibility C. It could be argued that this possibility would not immediately provide the present E. Gadd with enough of a change in memory to experience the sudden flash of inspiration that he does in the game, prompting the following question:

• Why would past E. Gadd not immediately construct the Hydrogush 4000 if this event had inspired him that much?

It can be assumed that not the memory of this event alone causes the sudden inspiration in present E. Gadd, but rather the combination of that memory and his later memories that past E. Gadd did not yet have (memories of constructing F.L.U.D.D. being a possible example).
From this we can conclude that an action in the past changing the course of history will cause it to change from that point forward and from a point exactly a THd afterwards, without creating an alternate universe. So time travel in the Mario universe operates on a special form of dynamic timeline. To explain this a bit clearer, I will demonstrate it using an example:

Gary the Goomba is presently 40 years old. He lives in Hollijolli Village, is missing a fang, and is married to Gina the Goomba. Until Gary was 20, he had lived in Toad Town with his family. When Gary was 20, he had just built his own house in Toad Town. When Gary was 25, lightning destroyed his house and prompted him to move to Hollijolli Village. When Gary was 30, he lost one of his fangs in a sledding accident in Hollijolli Village. When Gary was 35, he married Gina, whom he met in Hollijolli Village.

In the present, Mario & Luigi travel through a Time Hole that is 20 years deep. They meet 20-year-old Gary who has just finished his house, but can't afford to install a lightning rod, so they kindly give him enough coins to do so, changing the course of history. When Gary is 25, his house is struck by lightning, but it isn't destroyed, so Gary keeps living in Toad Town. When Gary is 30, he doesn't have an accident because he doesn't live in Hollijolli Village to go sledding. When Gary is 35, he doesn't marry Gina because he doesn't live in Hollijolli Village to meet her.
Exactly 20 years after Mario & Luigi change the course of history, when Gary is 40, Gary's memory is rearranged to remember Mario & Luigi giving him some coins when he was 20 and him using them to install a lightning rod on his house. When Gary is 45, he suddenly remembers that his house in Toad Town wasn't destroyed. However, he also recalls living in Hollijolli Village for 20 years because of lightning destroying his house, albeit more hazily, as he does not remember the original memory and this memory is only constructed from recalling the original one over the last 20 years. When Gary is 50, his missing fang somehow reappears in his mouth, as if had never been gone. He recalls missing it for 20 years. When Gary is 55, he is not married to Gina. The two of them still have all the memories they shared together in the last 20 years. When Gary is 60, he can recall a clear timeline from when he was 20 to when he was 40, just as he always could from his birth to age 20, but has conflicting memories between age 40 and now.
As you can see from this example, the new past quite literally catches up to anyone affected by the change in the course of history. What we don't know is what happens when all the Time Holes are closed. The course of history could continue to change until caught up with the present or it could cease changing.

How Time Travel Works in Yoshi's Island DS, Yoshi's New Island and Mario's Time Machine

Before the events of Yoshi's Island DS, in the present time, Kamek's crystal ball foretells that seven powerful stars fell during the time period in which the game takes place. Him and Bowser travel to the past in order to obtain these stars. We don't see any direct effects this time travelling has on causality, as this event is never mentioned again by any of the characters. However, an assumption can be made about the means by which Kamek and Bowser have travelled to this time. Bowser's Castle in this game notably features an adult Bowser's emblem on its front, which implies that it was built for an adult Bowser, likely in the present time. Even more interestingly, the castle features a large clock face on its central tower, giving off the impression that the entire castle is able to travel through time. Whether this is accomplished in the same way as E. Gadd's time machine or by some other means is unclear. At the end of the game, the castle explodes as it falls from the sky and Kamek, Bowser, and Baby Bowser are seen escaping by flying away. If the castle is indeed the time machine used by Kamek and Bowser to travel to this time period, its destruction could leave the pair to be stranded in this time period for an indefinite amount of time.
Yoshi's New Island notoriously gives us the line "Suddenly... warping through time and space... King Bowser appears!" without any further explanation for why or how Bowser has travelled to this time period. The game takes place immediately after the original Yoshi's Island, so it must take place before YIDS (in which Baby Mario seems familiar to Yoshi), and this couldn't be a stranded Bowser from that game. On top of that, Mario himself has also travels to this time period, donning the guise of Mr. Pipe, providing indirect help to Yoshi. Why Mario would act in secret instead of taking direct action like he does in PiT is and how he travelled through time is also a mystery.
While not canon, in Mario's Time Machine, Bowser travels to the past using a machine called the Timulator to steal artifacts from all over the world. Depending on the game's version, the Timulator either opens a portal to a certain point in time or travels to a certain point in time, taking passengers with it. The destination to which the Timulator can send a user is determined by inputting a location's name, a four-digit date and whether that date is BC or AD. The Timulator can't send a user to travel to every point possible to be inputted in it, sending them to the Cretaceous Period or back to the present if the destination is incompatible. The Timulator seems to be limited to destinations on Earth. Notably, Mario worries about history being changed forever by the artifcacts stolen from their time periods, so changing the course of history is possible. with no alternate universes created by it. We see history books missing certain words, but not all of their information as an effect of the changed course of history, which would lead to believe that the 'delayed' form of a dynamic timeline does apply as well. However, the causality of how exactly these items would change history in this specific way is dubious in most cases.
None of these examples directly contradict the time travel mechanics constructed from Partners in Time.

Potential Plot-Holes in Partners in Time Caused by Time Travel

Returning to PiT, two questions that are frequently brought up while discussing the game are the following:

1. Why do Mario & Luigi not seem to remember the Shroob invasion?
2. If the Shroobs conquered the Mushroom Kingdom in the past, then why do the Shroobs not control the kingdom in the present?

These two questions can be answered as follows:

1. Mario & Luigi were too young to remember any of the events properly. Adults are usually unable to recall memories of specific events experienced before the age of 3.
2. The Shroobs were eradicated by a force other than the time-travelling bros during the unchanged course of history.

There is, however, a question which is much more glaring, yet not as frequently discussed:

• Why do the citizens of the Mushroom Kingdom not seem to remember the Shroob invasion?

The characters most importantly affected by this are Toadsworth (and by extension Peach) and E. Gadd. How could anyone ever agree to sending the princess back in time to a point where a historical cataclysm befell the Mushroom Kingdom less than 25 years ago if they had even an ounce of historical knowledge? I certainly would not travel back in time to 1986 to visit Chernobyl.
This question can't be answered under the assumption that the Shroob invasion was a normal historical event. The invasion must have been either of the following:

• A conspiracy covered up by mass-revisions in history. People directly involved in the event like Toadsworth, Kamek, or Bowser would have to be silenced in regard to the invasion.
• A course of history that itself is different from the original one, caused by time travelling to the past.

Since the first option would require a level of control over the population of the Mushroom Kingdom that seems next to impossible, the following theory presents itself:

• The Shroobs had been using time travel themselves.

The Time Travelling Shroob Theory

We have already established that when the course of history is changed, the changed historical events are rewritten in real time from that point on, with people in the present only remembering what has already been rewritten up to the same point exactly a THd before the present. The beginning of the Shroob invasion coincides almost perfectly with Peach and the time machine's arrival in the past. Thus, nobody remembers the invasion prior to the point a THd after it begins to warn the princess of her voyage to the past. The sudden memories being rearranged might also be what causes Toadsworth to fall into a state of shroomshock.
This simply offers an explanation for why the Shroob invasion had been unknown by the entire populace of the Mushroom Kingdom prior to the events of PiT. Following this, I will outline arguments that point towards the Shroobs being able to use time travel:
In the final battle against Elder Princess Shroob, she is shown to have the ability of opening Time Holes at will herself. She uses this to shoot down Shroob saucers to fall into the Time Hole and later remerge from it as a means of delayed attack. It is unknown whether she has had this ability before the events of the game or if she received it by fusing with the Cobalt Star. While the former would point to this theory being true, arguments for and against it can be made just as well. The Cobalt Star's primary function seems to be to provide the time machine with power, being referred to as the machine's energy or fuel source a number of times. The ability to travel through time by opening Time Holes would instead be attributed to the machine itself. On the other hand, the Cobalt Star Shards by themselves have demonstrated the ability to open Time Holes, being responsible for the one leading to Toadwood Forest. However, this could also be the work of Elder Princess Shroob sealed inside the shard.
If the Shroobs are capable of using time travel, then it's possible that Younger Princess Shroob and Elder Princess Shroob are same entity from different points in time, equivalent to Baby Mario and Mario, respectively. The existence of two Shroob Princesses is presented by in-game text as them being sisters. However, if we assume that this claim is based on misinterpretation, figurative language, or deception by the characters presenting the claim and therefore not truthful, then the relation between the Shroob Princesses becomes open to interpretation. The claims that they are sisters are made by Younger Princess Shroob, Princess Peach, and Elder Princess Shroob:

• Younger Princess Shroob speaks exclusively in the Shroob language throughout the entire game. Subtitles are added to her speech somewhat consistently starting from the encounter between her and the bros aboard the Shroob Mother Ship. This implies that Mario & Luigi have learnt to understand some of the language over the course of the game. However, it also means that their understanding might not be completely accurate and the subtitles unreliable as a result.
• Princess Peach explicitly calls Elder Princess Shroob Younger Princess Shroob's twin sister. Due to her not knowing about the Shroobs' nature before imprisoning Elder Princess Shroob within the Cobalt Star, it could be that her statement is either based on her own assumptions or simply metaphoric in nature. It's unlikely that Peach would know the exact familial relation between the Shroob princesses.
• Unlike Younger Princess Shroob, Elder Princess Shroob is capable of speaking fluent English and unlike Princess Peach, she most certainly knows the exact relation she has to Younger Princess Shroob. Elder Princess shroob also refers to Younger Princess Shroob as her sister, and while it could be that she is deliberately masking the truth, the reason for doing so is not clear.

There is also the fact that the game's UI when targeting both Elder Princess Shroob and Younger Princess Shroob reads "Princess Shroob" for both of them, making no distinction in their names.
Perhaps the strongest counterargument against this point would be the fact that when Younger Princess Shroob is killed, Elder Princess Shroob is unaffected. Causality demands that if a person of the past died, their present version would also immediately cease to live (which is also the explanation for why you get a Game Over if Baby Mario & Baby Luigi fall in battle even if the adult Mario & Luigi are still around). A possible explanation for this is that fusing with the Cobalt Star has caused the two to become a separate entity that exists independently from Elder Princess Shroob. This entity would be able to exist until the changed course of history caused by Younger Princess Shroob's death caught up with the present.
We also need to evaluate the Shroobs' motivations for their invasion of the Mushroom Kingdom and why they would resort to using time travel:

• The Shroobs were searching for a new home. This is possibly due to the Shroob planet showing signs of regression, being unable to sustain the Shroob population. As a result, the population might already have declined drastically by the present day. This would prompt Princess Shroob to travel back in time in order to have more troops and/or people to save.
• The Mushroom Kingdom of the past is weak compared to its present version. The kingdom's rule is unclear, as Princess Peach is a baby and her parents seem to be absent, implied further by Toadsworth caring for her like a father. The Koopa Kingdom is also less of a threat with Bowser being a child whose goals primarily revolve around cookies and treasure. Most of all, Mario & Luigi as adults pose a major threat to the entire operation. Thus, travelling back in time to attack the Mushroom Kingdom in the past era is less of a risk.

From these points, it can be concluded that if the Shroobs themselves are indeed able to travel through time, doing so would be highly advantageous.
As a final point, let's look back at a question raised before:

• If the Shroobs conquered the Mushroom Kingdom in the past, then why do the Shroobs not control the kingdom in the present?

With the assumption that the Shroobs are time travellers themselves, a new answer to this question presents itself.

• The Shroobs never conquered the Mushroom Kingdom in the original course of history. They changed the course of history by invading after travelling back in time. However, this change was further altered by Mario & Luigi travelling back in time, eradicating the Shroobs and leaving the present kingdom unconquered.

This is going to be a long thread with thousands of words so unless you're truly interested in what multipathing is, how it works, how it's countered, and how it could be implemented in warthunder, you won't read it all, so i tried to TLDR the best i can at the bottom. The format uses Gemini AI to save my time as well as highlight key points in a Question -> Answer format. The questions are asked in ways that would be observable in game, while also providing realism to the multipath effect. My summarized implementation thoughts will also be TLDR at the bottom.
In radar systems, multipathing refers to the phenomenon where radar signals travel along multiple paths before reaching the target and reflecting back to the radar receiver. This can cause issues like:

• False targets: Reflected signals from objects like buildings or terrain can appear as additional targets on the radar display.
  
• Signal distortion: The combined reflected signals can weaken or distort the original signal, making it difficult to accurately determine the target's range, speed, or position.
  

How do missiles reduce the effect of multipathing on low flying targets?
Missiles themselves don't directly reduce the effect of multipathing on low-flying targets. Multipathing is an issue with the radar guiding the missile, not the missile itself.
Here's how radar systems can mitigate multipathing effects on low-flying targets:

• Advanced filtering techniques: Radars can employ signal processing algorithms to distinguish between the true target reflection and unwanted clutter from the ground or other objects.
  
• Pulse-Doppler radar: This type of radar transmits pulses and analyzes the returning signal's Doppler shift to differentiate between stationary clutter (like ground) and moving targets (like aircraft).
  
• Low-lobe antennas: These antennas minimize the radar signal transmitted close to the ground, reducing ground clutter reflections.
  

These techniques help radar systems provide a clearer picture to missiles, enabling them to better track low-flying targets despite multipathing challenges.
Does data link help as well?
Yes, data links can indirectly help reduce the effects of multipathing on low-flying targets for missiles in a couple of ways:

1. Sharing Target Information: Data links allow radar systems on other platforms (aircraft, ground stations) to share target data with the launching platform. This can provide a more complete picture of the target's location and movement, potentially reducing reliance on a single radar potentially affected by multipathing.
   
2. Improved Filtering: Data links can transmit processed radar data, which has already undergone some filtering to remove clutter. This can reduce the workload on the missile's own radar receiver, making it less susceptible to multipathing interference.
   

Older semi active radar missiles didn't have internal radar like more modern active radar missiles, and relied on the radar of the aircraft to guide the missiles. These aircraft usually were not equipped with data link, pulse doppler, or other semi-advanced mitigation techniques for multipathing. Were improvements made to the missiles seeker in order to mitigate multipathing?
You're right, older semi-active radar missiles faced greater challenges with multipathing due to limitations in both the missiles themselves and the launch platforms. Here's how they addressed multipathing to some extent:

• Filtering Techniques: While not as sophisticated as modern filtering, some early semi-active radar seekers incorporated basic filtering methods to differentiate the strongest target return from clutter.
  
• Seeker Design: Some seeker designs prioritized receiving reflected signals from specific target areas, like the top of an aircraft, which might be less susceptible to ground clutter.
  
• Launch Tactics: Launch tactics could involve maneuvers to minimize the missile's flight path over clutter-heavy areas, reducing multipathing effects.
  

Overall, mitigating multipathing in older missiles relied more on filtering within the seeker itself and launch tactics compared to the advanced techniques used in modern systems. These limitations are why semi-active radar missiles often performed better against high-flying targets with less ground clutter interference.
What were some various seeker or filtering types?
Here are some specific seeker and filtering techniques used in older semi-active radar missiles to mitigate multipathing, though they weren't as effective as modern methods:

• Track Gate Filters:** These filters focused on signals within a predicted range and velocity window, rejecting signals outside that area likely caused by multipathing.
  
• Spectral Filtering:** By analyzing the frequency content of the reflected signal, these filters could distinguish between the target's signature and ground clutter based on their spectral characteristics.
  
• Lobing Techniques:** Some seeker antenna designs employed multiple lobes with varying antenna patterns to null out reflections from specific directions (like the ground) while optimizing reception from the target's direction.
  

How do variations like the inverse monopulse seeker relate to this?
Inverse monopulse seekers represent a significant improvement in mitigating multipathing for semi-active radar missiles compared to older designs. Here's how they work:

• Traditional Trackers:** Conventional semi-active seekers compared the strength of the received signal in its entirety. Multipathing could create a stronger overall return signal even if it wasn't directly from the target.

*Inverse Monopulse: This design incorporates two or more antennas within the seeker. It compares the signal strength between these antennas to determine the target's direction rather than relying solely on overall signal strength.
*Multipathing Impact: Even with multipathing, the target's true location will cause a slight directional difference in the signal received by the seeker's antennas. Inverse monopulse can detect this disparity and focus on the target's true direction, effectively filtering out much of the multipathing clutter.
This directional comparison offers a significant advantage over relying on absolute signal strength, making inverse monopulse seekers much more effective in low-altitude environments where multipathing is prevalent.
Is multipathing a significant factor for active radar missiles?
Multipathing has a lesser impact on active radar missiles compared to semi-active radar missiles. Here's why:
-Active missiles have their own radar transmitters and receivers, making them less reliant on reflected signals from the launch platform's radar, which can be susceptible to multipathing.
-They can employ more sophisticated filtering techniques within the missile itself to distinguish the target's signature from clutter caused by multipath reflections.
However, multipathing can still affect active radar missiles to some extent, particularly at low altitudes where ground clutter is more prominent.
What environmental factors can lead to a higher multipath signature?
Several environmental factors can contribute to a higher multipath signature for radar systems:

• Terrain: Rough terrain with mountains, buildings, or other obstacles can create multiple reflection paths for the radar signal, increasing multipathing.
  
• Vegetation: Dense forests or vegetation can absorb and scatter radar signals, leading to more complex reflections and potential multipathing issues.
  
• Weather: Humidity, rain, or snow can refract radar signals, bending them and creating additional propagation paths that contribute to multipathing.
  
• Low Altitude: When a radar operates close to the ground, the signal is more likely to reflect off the ground and surrounding objects, creating more opportunities for multipathing.What environmental factors can lead to a lower multipath signiature?Here's what minimizes multipathing for radar systems:
  
• Flat, Open Terrain: Smooth, unobstructed areas with minimal clutter like buildings or mountains provide a clear path for the radar signal, reducing reflections that cause multipathing.
  
• Sparse Vegetation: Environments with low vegetation density allow the radar signal to travel with fewer obstacles, minimizing signal scattering and potential multipathing.
  
• Dry Weather Conditions: Clear skies with low humidity minimize signal refraction by atmospheric elements, leading to a more direct path and less multipathing.
  
• Higher Altitude: Operating at a higher altitude increases the distance between the radar and ground clutter, reducing the likelihood of ground-reflected signals interfering with the target signal.
  

Does the angular relation between the two aircraft have an effect on the multipath signature?
Yes, the angular relationship between the launching aircraft, the target aircraft, and any reflective objects that cause multipathing can affect the signal received by the radar. Here's why:

• Signal Strength: Depending on the angle, the target aircraft might reflect a stronger or weaker signal back to the radar. This can be crucial for distinguishing the target from background clutter if the multipath signal is significant.
  
• Doppler Shift: The relative angle between the aircraft also affects the Doppler shift of the reflected signal. Missiles and radars use this shift to differentiate moving targets from stationary clutter. In multipath scenarios, a favorable angle can help isolate the target's true Doppler signature.
  
• Signal Cancellation: In some cases, the relative positions can lead to partial or complete cancellation of the target signal by the multipath reflections. This can make it difficult to detect or track the target.
  

What angles would be more difficult to distinguish from a multipath signal?
Angles where the target aircraft and reflective objects are close in line with the radar will be more difficult to distinguish from a multipath signal. This is because:

• Similar Signal Path: When the target and reflector are aligned, the reflected signals from both might travel similar paths to the radar, making it challenging to differentiate based on signal arrival time.
  
• Doppler Shift Similarity: If the target and reflector are moving in similar directions relative to the radar, their Doppler shifts might be comparable, further complicating discrimination between the true target and multipath.
  
• Signal Cancellation: In some cases, the aligned position can lead to destructive interference, where the target's signal and the multipath reflection partially or completely cancel each other out, significantly weakening the target signal received by the radar.
  

Define "target" and "reflector"In the context of radar systems:

• Target: The object of interest that the radar is trying to detect and track. This could be an aircraft, ship, vehicle, or any object the radar needs to locate.
  
• Reflector: Any object in the environment that reflects the radar signal back to the radar receiver. This can include terrain, buildings, trees, or even weather phenomena like rain or snow. Ideally, reflectors are not the objects of interest and can create clutter that makes it difficult to detect the actual target.
  

Would a target flying low and perpendicular to the aircraft be more difficult to detect through multipathing than a target traveling low and directly at the aircraft?
Yes, a target flying low and perpendicular to the launching aircraft could be more difficult to detect through multipathing compared to a target flying directly at the aircraft at low altitude. Here's why:

• Signal Path: When the target is perpendicular, the reflected signal from the target travels a longer path compared to a direct approach. This can make it weaker and potentially more susceptible to cancellation by reflections from closer objects like terrain.
  
• Doppler Shift: The perpendicular target's relative motion creates a less pronounced Doppler shift compared to a head-on approach. This can make it harder to distinguish the target's signature from ground clutter, which might have a similar Doppler shift in this scenario.
  
• Multipath Reinforcements: Depending on the specific geometry, perpendicular flight paths might create multiple reflection points that reinforce each other, further obscuring the true target signal.What are some other multipath reinforcements?Multipath reinforcements occur when multiple reflections of the radar signal combine in a way that strengthens each other, making it even more challenging to detect the true target signal. Here are some additional examples beyond perpendicular flight paths:
  
• Corner Reflectors: Objects with sharp angles or dihedral shapes, like buildings with square corners, can create strong multipath reflections due to efficient signal bouncing between the various surfaces.
  
• Curved Surfaces: Curved objects like domes or spheres can focus radar signals, creating intensified reflections in specific directions that can overwhelm the target signal.
  
• Multiple Reflectors: In cluttered environments with numerous objects like trees in a forest, reflections can bounce back and forth between them, creating a complex web of reinforced multipath signals.
  

Would a target flying low and at the aircraft be harder to detect than a target flying low and directly away from the aircraft? (Test question, intentionally wrong)
No, a target flying low and directly at the aircraft wouldn't necessarily be harder to detect through multipathing compared to a target flying low and directly away. Here's why:

• Similar Multipath Effects: Both scenarios involve low-altitude flight, which means both are susceptible to ground clutter reflections causing multipathing.
  
• Doppler Shift Advantage: In a head-on approach, the target's relative velocity is maximized, leading to a more pronounced Doppler shift. This can actually benefit detection by making the target easier to distinguish from stationary clutter on the ground.
  

However, there are other factors to consider beyond multipathing that might influence target detectability:
-Radar Cross-Section (RCS): An aircraft's RCS depends on its size, shape, and material composition. In some cases, an aircraft's frontal RCS might be larger than its rear RCS, making it more detectable head-on.
-Radar Look Angle: The specific direction the radar antenna is pointed can affect signal strength. If the radar isn't perfectly aligned with either target, detection might be slightly less efficient.
Overall, while multipathing is a concern in both scenarios, a direct head-on approach might offer some advantages for target detection due to the Doppler effect. Other factors like RCS and radar look angle can also play a role.
So to summarize the past few points, aircraft relation plays a significant role in the efficiency of multipathing. Perpendicular and directly-away positions for the target aircraft can lead to stronger multipath signatures compared to a direct head-on approach.
This is because of the factors you mentioned: weaker target signal strength, less distinguishable Doppler shift, and potential for reinforced multipath reflections in certain geometries. In addition to multipathing, chaff is often used to enhance the reflection of radar waves.
Does this also effect pulse doppler radar types?
Yes, chaff can affect pulse doppler (PD) radars to a certain extent, but PD radars are generally more resistant to chaff compared to traditional radars. Here's why:

• Doppler Shift Filtering: PD radars rely on the Doppler shift principle to differentiate between moving targets (like aircraft) and stationary clutter (like chaff). Chaff typically falls through the air at a slow, relatively constant speed, creating a minimal Doppler shift. PD radars can filter out signals with minimal Doppler shifts, reducing the impact of chaff.
  
• Clutter Rejection Techniques: Many PD radars incorporate clutter rejection algorithms that can distinguish between the complex Doppler signature of a target aircraft and the simpler signature of chaff.
  

However, chaff effectiveness can depend on various factors:

• Radar Design: The specific design and processing techniques of a PD radar can influence its susceptibility to chaff.
  
• Deployment Techniques: The way chaff is deployed (quantity, altitude) can affect its effectiveness in overwhelming the radar's filtering capabilities.
  
• Target Range: At close range, the velocity difference between a target and chaff might be smaller, making it more challenging for PD radars to discriminate between them entirely.
  

Overall, pulse doppler radars offer a significant advantage over traditional radars in mitigating the effects of chaff due to their Doppler shift filtering and clutter rejection techniques. However, chaff can still be a factor in certain situations.
Can chaff also increase the multipathing effect due to how it reflects radar waves?
Yes, chaff can indirectly worsen multipathing effects for radar systems. Here's why:

• Multiple Reflectors: Chaff creates additional reflective objects in the environment. These extra reflectors can cause radar signals to bounce around more, creating more opportunities for multipathing.
  
• Complex Signal Reflections: Unlike a clean target return, chaff reflects radar waves in various directions due to its irregular shapes and materials. This can lead to more scattered reflections that contribute to a more complex multipath environment.
  

While chaff itself isn't the direct cause of multipathing (which is caused by signal bouncing off objects in the environment), its presence significantly increases the number and complexity of reflections, making it harder for radars to distinguish the true target signal from the clutter caused by multipathing.
Would that also increase the effectiveness of chaff against a pulse doppler radar, since the chaff itself has a relatively low doppler shift?
The effect isn't as straightforward. Here's why adding to the complexity of multipathing with chaff might not necessarily increase its effectiveness against pulse doppler radars:

• PD Filters Focus: Pulse doppler filters primarily target stationary clutter based on minimal Doppler shift. While chaff introduces more reflections, PD radars are designed to handle complex clutter environments.
  
• Doppler Differentiation: Even with increased multipathing, the actual target aircraft will still have its own distinct Doppler signature due to its movement. PD radars can potentially isolate this signature from the chaff clutter.
  

However, there can be some indirect effects:

• Processing Load: The increased complexity from multipath due to chaff can overload PD radar processing in some situations, making it temporarily harder to isolate the target signal.
  
• Reduced Signal-to-Noise Ratio: More chaff reflections can contribute to a higher noise level, reducing the overall signal-to-noise ratio of the target return. This can make it slightly more difficult to detect the target.
  

Overall, while chaff can add to the challenge for PD radars by worsening multipathing, their core functionality of filtering based on Doppler shift makes them generally more resilient to chaff compared to traditional radars.
So basically, chaffing while minimizing the targets doppler shift by flying perpendicular to the aircraft would be ideal, and it would potentially have a more pronounced effect down low?
There are some nuances to consider:

• Perpendicular Approach: While a perpendicular approach can minimize the target's relative velocity and Doppler shift, it might not be the most practical flight path during combat maneuvers.
  
• Doppler Shift Not Eliminated: Even perpendicular motion won't entirely eliminate the target's Doppler shift. Some shift will still be present due to the aircraft's own internal movements and the non-zero closing velocity between the two aircraft.
  
• Low-Altitude Advantage: Chaff is generally more effective at lower altitudes where ground clutter can further complicate the radar picture for the opponent.
  
• Combined Tactics: The ideal strategy might involve a combination of tactics like deploying chaff, executing maneuvers to reduce Doppler signature, and potentially using terrain masking to reduce radar exposure.
  

Remember, chaff effectiveness is situational and depends on various factors. While the perpendicular approach can reduce Doppler shift and potentially aid chaff in confusing the radar, it's one element of a broader electronic countermeasures strategy.
TLDR
Given the above information, we can summarize that a more realistic implementation of multipathing would generate a significant advance in tactical approach in the game. The multipathing effect could be refined on a per map basis, and similar to the front line mechanic, it could be worse in certain areas. For example, depending on plane aspect you may be able to multipath easier. If you're flying over a city, mountains, etc the radar signal would be more likely to have an unstable return than over water, or plains. In addition, an aircraft flying high should have an ability to mitigate multipathing, reducing it further due to the radar waves being too weak by the time they reach the aircraft for the radar to prioritize it, while low flying aircraft would be recieving more multipathing due to their own sidelobe energy being detected as noise. Also, modes like TWS would be more susceptible due to them having to use more power to sustain and monitor each track. The perpendicular approach, or notching, would also increase the multipath effect as well as other modifiers such as chaff, being in a "multipath zone" such as a city, mountains or other rough terrain, as well as the altitude of each aircraft and their position. Multipathing could have a base effect, and depending on these factors, modifiers could be placed in addition to raise the value of the multipathing in a dynamic way. This would eliminate gripen invulnerability, and other OP flight models. Airfields could be spawn protection 100% multipath, OR [hear me out] it follows the same logic as the rest of the map with addition of new airbase defense systems with a larger range and attack pattern that can engage enemy fighters as well as the missiles they shoot. A dedicated type for each role could even be added to make simulator a more immersive environment and add a new "final boss" for my fellow 'virtual weasels' to play with. The multipathing base could also be reduced incrementally, so early SARH with monopulse seekers are slightly worse than ARH but better than late SARH, which is still better than the Early first generations of SARH. This allows realism, the inclusion of MP as a valid tactic, solves OP modeling rushes, Airfield camping, and forces the players to evolve based on the situation, map, and number of enemies to exploit and explore the entirety of the map. Currently corners and sides going fairly unflown due to SARH being ineffective outside of 10km and having to be nose hot, causing a large number to lock someone on launch and proceed to overfly the entire map just to fight a mig who was in a fight by his spawn to get that one missile off, because of multipathing. 128 kilometers is small enough, but right now the player base in its current meta state probably uses less than 80 km² due to the fundamentals at work, so it feels even more cramped. There's loads more but I will leave the rest up to your speculation. Here's hoping for change

Boys: Chase, Justin, Ripper, Topher
Girls: Anne Maria, Jasmine, MK
Episode 17: Holy MK-oly!
“Last time on Total Drama Action! It was every dude and dudette for themselves, as the teams were busted up. But that didn't stop the Gaffers from forming an alliance between themselves.”
“Chase wowed everybody with his fancy footwork during the first spy challenge and managed to save everybody with a bit of assistance from Jasmine.”
“The cast made it out of a fake exploding building, but failed to defuse some serious stink bombs, forcing them to de-stink in tomato juice baths. I love my job.”
“In the end, Topher and Chase got the fabulous reward - a trip to the local stinky cheese factory!”
"Will the former Grips manage to keep things together?" Chris asked as the screen split into a three-way, Justin against brown on the left, Anne Maria against orange in the middle, and Topher against red on the right. "Or will the Gaffers’ alliance self-destruct first?" The ex-Grips were replaced with a quarters split with MK and Chase on top against gold and purple; Ripper and Jasmine below against green and blue.
"All this on today's episode of Total! Drama! Action!"
(Theme Song)
The scene opened up at night as the three remaining girls exited the craft services tent with cheese in their arms.
"Wow, this is some fine gouda!" Anne Maria told Jasmine and MK after taking a bite out of a hunk of cheese. "I have to give thanks to Topher for gettin' me some."
"The gouda is nothing compared to the gruyère that Chase got me!" MK said before stuffing her mouth. “Your boyfriend needs to put my tastes into consideration.”
"You didn't even care about the gruyère until you tasted it," Anne Maria argued. "And if you diss Topher again, I'm ripping holes into your hat."
"You wouldn't dare!" MK countered with faux shock. "That hat means more to me than your weekly tans in the sun."
"That's enough out of you two!" Jasmine stopped the argument. “We are nearing the end of the game, and petty squabbles should be the last thing to think about right now!”
"Not my fault," Anne Maria scoffed. "Diminutive here doesn't know when to keep her mouth shut!"
The scene flashed to the guys’ trailer. "I got you your cheese, guys," Topher said as the camera cut to the inside, Ripper, Justin, and Chase seated in front of a table of cheese and Topher standing far away from them. "Now hurry up with eating them so I don't have to smell them for the rest of the night!"
“How were you able to handle the cheese factory if you can't stand the smell?” Ripper asked, taking a bite out of a chunk of swiss cheese.
“I brought nose plugs with me in order to make the trip tolerable to my scent,” Topher explained.
“Who knew a tour of a cheese factory could make you smell so bad?” Justin stated.
“Me and Topher took plenty of showers after coming back so we wouldn't have to deal with any complaining,” Chase said.
"One of the boys has to go next. Obviously," Anne Maria told MK and Jasmine as they brushed their teeth in the communal bathroom.
“They do outnumber us by just one, so we'll take your words into consideration,” Jasmine said.
"I hear you," MK said as she spat in the sink. "Guys are cutthroat."
The camera flashed to Chris getting a massage from what could be assumed to be Chef. "The views of the contestants of Total Drama Action do not necessarily reflect the opinions of this network or parent company. They may, but not necessarily," he said in a calm voice before chuckling.
The boys were shown sitting laying on their bunk beds. "Did everybody finish their cheese?" Topher asked the others. "I don't want the ladies to complain about our smell."
"Of course we did," Chase said. “We're not going to be the next Pepé le Pew.”
The camera flashed back to the girls as MK and Anne Maria laid on their beds while Jasmine stood next to the door.
"So what do you wanna do?" Jasmine asked Anne Maria.
"We need a plan," Anne Maria replied. "We have to vote off a boy and soon."
"That's more of a goal than a plan," Jasmine commented.
"That's not the goal," Anne Maria replied with a short laugh. "The goal is and will always be-"
"The million dollars," the three girls said at once.
“Good night, girls!” Jasmine waved them goodbye and exited the trailer in order to sleep on her tree.
The shot cut back outside, a chorus of crickets and frogs heard in the background as the camera panned up to the full moon and faded forward into the morning sun. A high-pitched scream heralded another scene change as Chef Hatchet was shown in a pink floral nightgown, tied up and dangling from a rope above a street.
"Let go of me already!" Topher demanded as Chase forcibly dragged him to where the rest of the cast had already gathered, all of them in their nightwear.
"Why'd we have to come all the way out here?" Chase asked as Topher removed his sleeping mask.
"And why's Chef dangling over there?" Anne Maria added, looking up at the tied-up man.
A short drumroll opened up a more engagingly dramatic muscial piece as the camera cut to what was obviously Chris McLean standing atop a nearby building in a familiar-looking cape and cowl. With a floodlight at his back and a rope around his waist, he dived gracefully off the roof. A 'flying' sound effect accompanied a shot of him swinging towards the camera, and he soon snatched Chef to freedom. The pair continued to swing upward thanks to the host's rope, but it soon reached its peak length. Chris' costume flew off him and the smiles faded from their faces as the rope snapped, and they fell to the street with a shout.
"I knew that bungee wouldn't hold!" Chris yelled angrily, his hair completely messed up as he stood up off of Chef. "That's what happens when production cheaps out! And now my hair is all mussed up!" Chef stood up beside him with a dazed expression.
"Excuse me," Topher interrupted indignantly, "but can you get to the point and tell us what's going on?"
"When! I! Feel! Like! It!" Chris answered angrily, getting in his face and smoothing part of his hair with each word. He paused for a moment afterward as he and Topher stared at one another. "And now," he finally said, "I feel like it!"
A soft but appropriately grand tune began to build as me made his next announcement. "Today's challenges are inspired by the superhero flick!"
"Today's challenges?" Jasmine repeated in disbelief.
"We haven't even brushed our teeth yet!" Chase added.
“Or eaten breakfast!” Ripper added as well.
"Why do you enjoy making us compete so early in the morning?" MK growled.
"Evil never sleeps," Chris countered matter-of-factly, "and neither will you! Besides, superheroes don't do the things of mere mortals! They have screaming ladies to rescue!" Chef was shown fanning himself in mock exhilaration as the host spoke.
"Actually, there are some superheroes and supervillains that are mere mortals," Ripper interrupted. "Owlman and Leader Brazil for the heroes, and Screwball and Full Deck for the villains. Those are just a couple of examples," he rattled off confidently. The camera suddenly pulled out to show the others staring at him questioningly, causing him to look at them and shrug. "What? The only things that I'm genuinely interested in reading are comic books."
"And how would you like it if you had to go toe-to-toe with any of those guys, hmm?" Chris asked pointedly, and got no answer in return. "Yeah, that's what I thought. There are three things intrinsic to all good superhero movies," he said as the music began again. "One: superheroes have super powers. Two: superheroes save people. And my personal favorite, three: superheroes wear tights. Which means," he said as Ripper, Anne Maria, Jasmine, and Justin watched, "you will all be wearing," he paused to laugh, "teensy-tiny tights!" The contestants immediately began to protest.
"Why are you all in your PJs?" Chris asked with a scowl. "Get dressed and meet me back on set at superhero speed. Which means, you should already be back here!" He laughed again before calling "And make sure to wear something that goes with brightly-hued spandex!"
The scene flashed to MK, Jasmine, and Chase walking together in the background. “With all the cheese that was given to us, I think I know which superhero I'm going to be,” Ripper told the three as he walked past them in the foreground.
Confessional: Ripper
"Cheese can build up a lot of muscle, which comes in handy if I want to punch anyone in the face should they cross me," Ripper told the confessional camera with a piece of cheese in his hand. “Plus, it's also part of dairy, and if I load up too much on dairy, I can create a smell that can ward off anybody," he snickered and swallowed his cheese.
Confessional: Chase
“I've always fantasized about being a superhero,” Chase confessed. “Just imagine me riding on my bike or skateboard and kicking butt with my karate skills. My preferred choice of weapon? A bo staff, but not a wooden one. Those tend to snap easily.”
Confessionals End
The shot moved to the former Grips, who were also walking together.
"I talked with Jasmine and MK about voting for the boys, you two not included," Anne Maria whispered to Topher and Justin.
"The Gaffers are in an alliance, possibly," Justin replied, "but with four boys and three girls currently here, me and Topher can talk to Ripper and Chase about voting for one of the girls. That way, they'll think that we'll be targeting the girls when instead, we're targeting them."
“I had no idea you could think that much,” Topher said in amazement.
“A near-death experience can change a man, Topher,” Justin reminded him. “Once you've lost everything, there's nothing left to lose except the money.”
Confessional: Topher
"I can kinda relate to Justin here," Topher said. "I thought a splinter and swollen eye would be damaging to me, but I managed to recover."
Confessional Ends
A tenser tune played over a long-distance shot of the film lot as the camera zoomed in on the cityscape in the top left beyond the amphitheatre, and the scene cut to the fully-clothed castmates standing between Chris, a line of sewing machines, and a few bins of cloth.
"For your first challenge," the host announced, "each of you will create your own superhero identity."
"Sweet!" Ripper smiled.
"You'll make your own superhero costume using nothing but your fertile imagination," Chris continued, seemingly on the brink laughter, "and tons of spandex!" A close-up of the bins of spandex rolls was shown before a beeping brought the camera's focus to a dump truck backing up to the host. It dumped a load of miscellaneous stuff on the ground, and Chris added "And some other junk! You'll be judged on originality and style of costume, how rocking your superpower is, and how cool your superhero name is! Top score wins an advantage in the next round and invincibility from tonight's elimination. Chef will, of course, play the supervillain, which let's face it, won't be much of a stretch."
A green-and-yellow circular logo of snake's head spun rapidly into the foreground, then retreated into a tilted still of what was obviously a costumed Chef Hatchet and tabby cat set against a background of radial green stripes. The big man was dressed head to toe in green spandex, with the same circular snake logo on his chest and a similarly-themed fanged cowl. The cat merely wore a simple green mask, and was bearing his front claws.
"Meet, Pythonicus!" the host announced. "And his sidekick kitty, Dander Boy! They will sabotage you at every turn." Dander Boy meowed and scratched the air.
"Any questions?" Chris asked as the footage cut back to him. All seven castmates rose their hands. "No? Perfect! Aaaannnd, action!"
"I call dibs on that one!" MK yelled immediately as she dashed towards a roll of red spandex.
"Hey, I wanted that!" Chase interrupted, going for the same roll.
Confessional: MK
"That color would have looked better on me," MK explained, "but I have to stay on Chase's good side if I want him to not suspect me."
Confessional Ends
"Okay, it's yours!" MK told Chase with a smile, relinquishing her grasp on the roll of red. Chase cast her a stunned glance, then turned and ran away.
The Pythonicus logo spun up through the screen again, and as it did a piece of music reminiscent of a cheesy 1960s superhero TV show. A montage began of the costumed supervillain interfering with the contestants' challenge, beginning with Jasmine as she carefully measured what looked to be a green shirt and tights on a table in front of the sewing machines. A quick-pan to the left showed Pythonicus lurking at the end of the row of sewing machines; he dropped Dander Boy, and the shot quick-panned back to Jasmine as the cat quickly tore her costume to shreds and jumped away.
Next was Chase after a quick logo transition as he lifted a beach ball out of the junk heap with a smile. Lurking just behind the tip of the heap, Pythonicus swiped the ball and Chase was shown gaping as the ball was popped in front of him.
Another logo transition, and the third person shown was MK as she fed her gray spandex through one of the sewing machines. Standing behind her, Pythonicus dropped a small scrap of pink onto the gray, and it was quickly sewed on. MK saw it immediately, and glared over her shoulder at the villain.
Anne Maria was fourth after yet another logo transition, and she had already compiled a silver colored blouse and pants. After carefully laying down an insignia consisting of a silver diamond on her shirt just right, she looked away for a second and Pythonicus flipped the insignia upside down. Anne Maria looked back with a sparkly golden cape in her hands and a small smile on her face that changed into a frown when she noticed what was flipped.
Fifth came Ripper after the now-usual transition effect, but he was just leaning against a sewing machine and idly picking his nose. Pythonicus was openly watching him nearby in an awkward pose, but after Ripper spent several moments ignoring the villain, he turned and walked away.
The last contestant shown was Topher. He was feeding blue spandex through one of the sewing machines. The camera panned down to show Pythonicus inserting a wire into the outlet the machine was plugged into, then back up to show Topher being electrocuted.
Another logo transitioned the scene back into the still shot of Pythonicus and Dander Boy, which held for a few seconds before the cheesy background music came to an end.
The scene flashed to a modeling runway set up along one of the streets of the fake city. The camera was centered on the curtain 'backstage', with the catwalk set up in front of it. To the left, it ran almost to the edge of the screen, and was flanked by various stage lights. And to the right it stopped short just in front of the judge's table, where the trio of Chris McLean, Pythonicus, and Dander Boy sat.
"Now wearing a superhero costume of his own design," Chris dramatically announced to a calm music track as the camera and a pair of spotlights focused in on the backstage curtain, "our first super-model!"
The curtain swung open to reveal Chase dressed in red spandex and a belt with a baseball bat attached to it. His chest bore no insignia, but his face did bare a happy grin.
The camera cut to the judges as Dander Boy shut off the music and Chris sighed. "State your name and superpower," he droned as Chase hopped up to the end of the catwalk.
"I'm Danger Dynamo," Chase said, "and I've got all the powers of an extreme daredevil!" He took his baseball and mimed hitting a baseball with it.
"You're serious?" Chris told him dryly. "How do you fight bad guys? By running bullheaded into them?"
"Not only do I have this bat and my acrobatic skills," Chase continued, "but I also use my trustworthy skateboard for transport. If I had one now, I'd be demonstrating it."
Chris furrowed his brow and made a mark on his clipboard. "Well that's worth a whole 5 points..."
Chase walked away just as Justin walked up to the end of the runway. The eye candy's costume had no spandex, but he had chopped logs attached to his head, arms, and legs by multiple ropes.
"Dude, you look ridiculous," Chris told him bluntly. "So just tell me what you can do."
"I am Timber Man!" Justin declared proudly, striking a pose against a golden background. "And my superpower is…" he threw a couple of wood chips out of his hands.
The camera quickly cut to Chris as the wood chips fell in front of him. “Seriously? Wood chips?”
“Oh, and I can float. And make fire as long as I've got matches. And I don't get too close to the flame,” Justin finished with a nervous look.
"Lame!" Chris said and wrote on his clipboard. "2 points. Next!"
Ripper was the next one as he ran up the runway with a paper crown on top of his head and his shirt taken off to show a drawing of a milk carton and a chunk of cheese. He posed confidently and said "I'm King Dairy, and with enough dairy products, I can cook up gas!" He took out four chunks of cheese and stuffed them into his mouth. After he did, he let out a burp and fart at the same time. “The king has just cut the cheese!”
The gassy cloud of the bully's fart flew over to Pythonicus's face, causing him to wail and scream “It burns!” before fainting to the ground.
"Impressive," Chris said as he and Dander Boy looked at the fallen cook. "Gross, but impressive. 7 points for King Dairy."
“Booyah!!” Ripper celebrated.
The scene flashed forward to Topher standing proudly at the end of the runway in his dark blue spandex and light blue cape. His insignia was of his own face.
"I am Frosty Man!" Topher declared. "My powers include water and ice, and I use them to put out fires and nefarious plots."
“Do you squirt ice and water out with your hands?” Chris asked.
“No, with this!” Topher responded before he took out a fire extinguisher and squeezed the foam out in front of him. “How ‘bout that?”
"Cool if you want to be a firefighter," Chris answered, "but kinda dull for a superpower! 6 points."
Topher shrugged and walked away.
MK was next in her gray spandex. A piece of rope was attached to her butt, and she had a black beanie that covered her eyes, but had holes cut into them so she could see. "I am Street Rat," she declared, "and nobody can stop me thanks to my brains, sleight of hand, and ability to not be detected!"
"Those are skills that you normally have," Chris commented. "Nothing new to me, but great costume. 4 points."
MK pursed her lips in annoyance, but walked away without further comment.
Another flash forward put Jasmine in front of the judges at the end of the catwalk. She was wearing green spandex with no insignia and had a coil of rope wrapped around her waist.
"Looking pretty cool there," Chris told the Australian girl. "What's your name and superpower?"
"The name's Amazonia," Jasmine announced, "and the only superpowers I need are determination, strength, and my ability to hogtie enemies with my rope."
"Not bad," Chris said as he jotted something down in his notes. "I'd prefer something a little flashier, but the intimidating factor works in your favor. 5 points!"
Jasmine walked back down the catwalk, and Anne Maria replaced her. Her costume consisted of her in her normal clothes, but recolored to be silver and was noticeably sparkled with glitter. She had her diamond insignia on her blouse, silver goggles on her eyes, and a golden cape on her back.
"And what are you supposed to be?" Chris wondered.
“Bling Girl is my name!” Anne Maria introduced. “I have indestructible hair powerful enough to beat bad guys into shape. I can also blind my foes with my hair spray and cause explosions with my perfume spills in order to ward them off. Plus, I can take them on with my fists and sharp nails.”
“Awesome! Your powers are spectacular and sure to knock anyone out of commission," Chris said with a wide grin as he marked down the score. "10 points."
"Umm, why does she get a perfect score?" MK wondered as she stepped up to the judge once more, still in her Street Rat costume. "Her powers just consist of her daily hobbies like mine."
"That's because your powers are less likely to attack villains," Chris told her. "Anne Maria's is more creative."
"If you're gonna complain some more, I have a way of handling that," Anne Maria told MK with a pointed glare.
"No thanks," MK shook her head. "I don't want my nostrils to be burned by your perfume."
"Man, I love this show!" Chris told the camera with a wink.
(Commercial Break)
The scene faded back in to a shot of several additional set pieces along the fake city street. To the far left was a fake burning building up on stilts, then a mattress laying in front of a twilit forest backdrop, then a fake skyscraper, and finally a large trampoline in front of another evening backdrop on the far right.
The camera zoom-panned to the right, showing a ladder beyond the trampoline and Chris and the cast nearby. "For your second challenge, we will be testing your super prowess." The shot focused in on Jasmine as she raised a concerned eyebrow.
Confessional: Jasmine
"Chris can't really expect us to have actual superpowers," Jasmine told the confessional, still in her Amazonia costume. "After all, we are still human beings. It's not like we were bitten by a radioactive spider or had our bodies struck with electricity!"
Confessional Ends
"You'll have to leap over a building in a single bound," Chris told the contestants, "using this trampoline from the set of the movie 'Trampoline Thunder 2'! Awesome flick," he flashed a thumbs-up at the camera. "You'll be judged on how far and how high you jump," he continued as the camera quick-panned to the diving board at the top of the ladder. "And please, properly time your landing as we wouldn't want you to land anywhere other than on this soft, cushy mattress." As he spoke, another quick-pan took the scene down to the mattress where Dander Boy was busy washing his paw. The background music rose dramatically as the camera zoomed in, and the villainous feline was sent flying by one of several errant springs that popped out of the mattress.
The contestants gaped in shock, and the host continued. "Our first and foremost priority at Total Drama Action is you safety and well-being," he told them before slowly breaking out into laughter. "Next, you'll have to save a woman falling from a building," Chris said as the shot moved over to the fake burning building. "The woman will be played by a sack of potatoes in a dress," he said as Pythonicus leaned out of the building's window holding said dressed-up sack. "Which will be a real catch for you guys," he quipped.
Confessional: Anne Maria
"Chris is one to talk," Anne Maria sniffed. "He probably had dinner with that thing!"
Confessional Ends
A brief clip of Chris and the potato sack in a dress was shown, the pair seemingly enjoying a romantic candlelit dinner as touching music played and the smiling host poured the sack a glass of wine.
"And finally," Chris said as the scene moved back to the challenge, "you'll walk across a power line during a meteor shower!" The camera panned past the burning building to a row of power lines with a few mattresses below them, and Pythonicus tossing a bowling ball in one hand. He tossed it casually, and it flew straight through a water tower causing the water inside to come gushing out.
"The person to finish the course with the best time will also win invincibility alongside Anne Maria!" Chris announced as the contestants turned their shocked looks back to him. "Anne Maria, you're up first. Ten seconds will be shaved off your time for winning the first round."
“Aw yeah!” Anne Maria stepped forward confidently.
Confessional: Topher
"I'm happy that Anne Maria won the first challenge and all," Topher said, "but I want either Chase or Ripper to win the second part. That way, we can vote out the non-immune player."
Confessional Ends
"Aaaand, action!" Chris announced with a stopwatch in his hand, a drumroll starting up the fast-paced music as the scene immediately flashed up to Anne Maria on top of the diving board.
With a quick glance downward, she did a cannonball off the board, landing in the center of the trampoline and bouncing back up like a shot. She continued to hold her legs close to her body as she spun through the air and over the top of the skyscraper, and landed on the mattress with a roll and got back to her running position.
"So far some impressive moves from Bling Girl," Chris narrated.
Anne Maria quickly ran to the 'burning building', but tripped and fell just short of where the potato sack fell.
"Looks like we're having real mashed potatoes tonight, eh Chef?" Chris taunted. "None of that powdered stuff."
"Not much of a shining diamond now!" MK teased.
"Nice quip," Chris told the girl.
The shot cut back over to Anne Maria at the electrical pole as she started to climb up it, the camera quickly moving to the top as she started trying to make her way across the wires. She dodged two bowling balls, but dodging the second put her in the path of a third that knocked her off the wires and onto one of the mattresses below.
"Looks like you didn't make it," Chris taunted.
Confessional: Anne Maria
"What is with those mattresses?" Anne Maria muttered until she noticed bugs crawling on her right arm. "Get off!" she snarled as she shook her arm in order to ward off the bugs.
Confessional Ends
"Ripper, you're up!" Chris called before the scene flashed up to Ripper looking down thoughtfully from the diving board.
"Don't mess up, Dairy King!" MK said dryly from below, catching the shirtless boy's attention. “You know what's at risk!"
Ripper frowned a bit. "That's King Dairy, Street Rat!" He turned his attention back to the diving board, and took a deep breath. "It's Ripper Time!"
He jumped off the board and hit the trampoline legs-first, and flew up into the sky. “Time to call upon dairy!!” Ripper brought out four pieces of cheese and ate them all, producing a fart and burp that soared him over the skyscraper and landed him onto the mattress below before running off again.
"King Dairy to the rescue!" Ripper shouted before hopping off at top speed towards the next building. Pythonicus laughed evilly and dropped the starch-filled damsel, but Ripper leapt up and grabbed the sack in his arms before it hit the ground. "There you go. Feel feel to praise King Dairy for a day's work," he said proudly as he put the sack down on the ground.
"Hurry it up, King! You're on the clock!" Chris called from the sidelines, a stopwatch in his hands.
Confessional: Jasmine
“Ripper's no Superman or anything, and his attitude could use a little work, but the man's got some sweet moves,” Jasmine commented.
Confessional Ends
The camera cut to Ripper's quick and bounding climb up the utility pole. He reached the top and looked down, but after the first bowling ball missed him, he got into action, missing the next two bowling balls entirely.
"C'mon, Pythonicus!" Chris told his supervillain assistant, who paused in mid-throw to glare back at him, then toss the bowling ball at the host instead. It hit Chris upside the head, earning a satisfied smile from MK who had been standing beside him. Unfortunately, she didn't notice the ball coming back down and was hit on the top of her head and knocked down. The two groaned in pain.
The shot cut back to Ripper as he flawlessly ran to the end of the power lines and jumped down, landing with a powerful thud on his feet.
"And King Dairy saves the day!" he declared victoriously.
"Never thought I'd say this, but," Chris said as he got back to his feet, face scuffed and hair well out-of-place, "nice work, King Dairy." He smiled and checked his stopwatch, adding "Made good time, too. 36 seconds!"
"I'd do better if there was an actual damsel," Ripper said with a smirk as he walked past the host and stopped next to MK. "Try and top that, Rat Face!"
"It's Street Rat!" MK told him. "And worse of all, you already know that!"
Confessional: MK
"Ripper is my biggest enemy on the show, but I do have to keep him around if it means gaining more votes or using him as a shield," MK admitted in the confessional trailer, still in her Street Rat costume.
Confessional Ends
"Next!" Chris called happily, his hair already fixed. The background music picked up in intensity as a montage began of the other five superheroes running the course, beginning with Street Rat MK sprinting towards the ladder and climbing up it; Frosty Man Topher looked down warily from the end of the diving board; Danger Dynamo Chase jumped off the board; and Amazonia Jasmine dived off the board.
The scene quick-panned down to the trampoline as Topher hit it, sprung back up, and hit the side of the skyscraper; Chase flew over the building with a flip; Jasmine soared over the skyscraper with her body spread out; and Timber Man Justin vaulted over the top with his limbs tucked in.
MK hit the mattress below at a roll and kept running, catching the sack of potatoes but tossing it aside just as quickly. Topher came up behind her and paused with his arms open wide, and after the potato sack landed, he set it down and took off.
Jasmine was shown working her way across the electrical wires, but one of the bowling balls took her off. Pythonicus grinned darkly and sent the next ball flying. It nearly hit Chase, but he was able to jump down to dodge it, then grab the wire and swing back up to keep going. Justin was next, but although he jumped and rolled over one bowling ball, he flubbed the landing, landed on the wire with his groin, and got electrocuted. He fell smoldering to the mattress below, and the intense music came to an end as Chris pressed the button on his stopwatch.
"While Danger Dynamo did a really good job," he told the castmates who had lined up in front of him once again, "he was still three seconds short of beating the record. The winner of the second challenge, and invincibility with Bling Girl is," he took out his clipboard as he dramatically announced "King Dairy!"
"Yes!" Ripper cheered. "I won the challenge!"
"Maybe you are cut out to be a superhero," MK told him before chuckling. “Maybe.”
"Hey, superheroes?" Chris interrupted, pinching his nose and waving his clipboard in front of his face. "You all smell super gross. Time to hit the showers, and decide who's gonna get kicked to the curb."
The footage skipped ahead to nightfall, the shot lingering on the cast trailers as Anne Maria exited from the girls'. As the scene cut inside, MK and Jasmine were shown discarding most of their costumes.
"Since Ripper is immune, there's no voting for him tonight," MK said.
“And we are not going to eliminate Chase at all,” Jasmine declared.
"So that leaves us with Justin and Topher," MK said.
“I think it'd be best if we vote-” Jasmine responded, only to be interrupted by a sharp rapping on a nearby window. Confused, the two girls went to investigate, and the scene cut back outside to show Ripper and Chase waiting below, the two of them out of costume.
"Did Anne Maria leave?" Chase wondered.
"Yes," MK said.
"Good. We have to talk about who to vote," Chase said.
"Well I figured we should get rid of Justin," Jasmine whispered. "I used to be on his team, and he wasn't the most helpful at the time."
"I don't really care about pretty boy, so he can go," Ripper spoke up.
"But I say that Topher's the bigger threat," MK interrupted. “He was able to beat Jasmine in the prehistoric challenge and won the reward alongside Chase in the spy challenge.”
"And plus, he did just join the game a few episodes ago," Chase added.
"I'm aware of those instances, but I remember Justin trying to use his looks to get out of doing the challenges!" Jasmine countered. "Topher hasn't done anything like that so far!"
"And taking down Topher in the finale would be similar to doing the same to Justin!" Ripper said.
MK groaned. "Chase, do you still want to vote off Topher?"
“Now that I think about it, gunning for Justin would be a better choice,” Chase admitted.
"If that's how it's gonna be, then I'll vote for Justin as well!" MK said in defeat. "Next time, we take out Topher. Got it?"
The other three nodded.
The scene flashed to outside the communal bathrooms just as Anne Maria opened the door and walked in to Justin and Topher with their lower bodies wrapped up in towels and hair for Topher.
"Hey boys!" Anne Maria said brightly. "I didn't expect you to be here."
"Yeah," Justin said while Anne Maria came over to them, "but we have to discuss our voting plans, and this was the best place to do it."
"Exactly. So we're going to vote for Chase tonight," Topher said. “He's one of the most athletic contestants here, and if we underestimate him, he could make it to the finale.”
"I got it. I don't want to vote for any of my girls today!" Anne Maria said happily.
"Good. We'll leave you to shower alone. See you at the ceremony!" Topher smiled and pecked Anne Maria on the cheek before he and Justin left the building.
Another flash transitioned the shot to a close-up of the guys' trailer. "Psst! Hey!" MK hissed at one of the windows in the guys' trailer from the bushes outside. "Anybody in there?"
It was Topher who answered, sliding the window open and looking out. “MK? What are you doing here?”
"I'm here to dish out the news!" MK whispered.
“And what could that be?” Topher wondered.
"Look, me, Chase, Ripper, and Jasmine are planning to vote for Justin tonight, but I know how to prevent that," MK grinned.
“Which is?” Topher raised an eyebrow.
"I'll vote alongside you guys," MK said. "Look, I know from a certain source that you, Justin, and Anne Maria are going to vote for Chase, and I want him gone too!"
“But isn't Chase in your alliance?” Topher asked. “Why do you want him gone?”
"Anne Maria and Ripper have immunity, Jasmine and Justin didn't do well this challenge, and we're not voting for ourselves," MK added.
"Alright, those are fair points," Topher considered, “but wouldn't your alliance smell something fishy if there are four votes to three?”
“I've already got that covered,” MK smirked. “Don't worry about it.”
“If you say so,” Topher shrugged and closed the window.
Confessional: Topher
“To be fair, my plan was to vote for the non-immune guy, but how did MK even know about what I said in the confessional?” Topher asked.
Confessional: MK
"I am loving my strategy of recording confessionals," MK sighed in satisfaction. "I told Chase that we should just ignore Ripper and Jasmine and vote for Topher for the sake of the game. In that daredevil's head, he thinks that Topher will get the most votes if Justin votes him off as well! Oh how wrong he is," she finished with a teasing nod.
Confessionals End
The post-confessional static faded directly into the Gilded Chris theme. All the standard fanfare and reverence towards the host came and went, and the man himself walked up to the amphitheater podium as the camera zoomed in on the ceremony.
"And now, we vote," Chris said with a dark grin. The castmates were shown voting briefly, the trio of Jasmine, Anne Maria, and MK on the top row above Ripper and Chase, while Justin and Topher sat in front.
"And, the Gilded Chris goes to...," Chris announced before Pythonicus descended upside-down on a rope from the ceiling, handed him the results, and was pulled back up. "Anne Maria, and...Ripper! MK, and...Jasmine!"
"And we're down to the final three," Chris announced as the tension rose in the background music. He paused as he held up the folded paper he'd been given, then said "Justin!"
"And finally...," Topher and Chase were shown looking worried in a split-screen, "Topher!" The blonde boy smiled victoriously as his half of the screen slid away, leaving only a very shocked Chase.
"What?!" Chase exclaimed in panic.
Confessional: MK
“If I don't want to look like a traitor to the others, then the best thing I could do is not vote for Chase,” MK confessed. “Besides, he already got the majority of the votes, so I voted for Topher.”
Confessional Ends
"But how?" Jasmine stammered. “I thought we were voting off Justin.”
"MK told me to vote for Topher. I thought that…" Chase said before turning to glare at MK. “You voted for me, didn't you?! I knew Millie was right about not trusting you!”
“Hey, I didn't vote for you at all,” MK denied. “My vote was for Topher along with yours.”
"Did you two vote for Chase?" Jasmine eyed Anne Maria and Justin.
“Yes, and Topher did as well,” Anne Maria confirmed. “We didn't want him to overpower us.”
“I thought that Justin would vote for Topher as well, but I was wrong,” Chase said in disappointment.
"Sorry, Danger Dynamo, but it's time for you to take the Walk of Shame," Chris announced.
“There's nothing left to do but accept my defeat,” Chase sighed.
It was the spinning logo of Pythonicus that transitioned the scene to the red carpet, the sad but reverent elimination music already playing as Jasmine, Ripper, and MK stood with Chase one last time.
“I'll miss you guys,” Chase told them. “And Ripper, I'm super sorry about Izzy's elimination.”
“I still can't understand it, but I'll let bygones be bygones since you're going home,” Ripper said.
"MK, you're annoying, but thankfully, you didn't vote for me," Chase said to her.
"My pleasure," MK replied pridefully.
“Jasmine, we haven't gotten many opportunities to talk to each other, but you've been pretty cool towards me. I hope you win,” Chase spoke.
"No promises, but okay," Jasmine agreed. "And give a hello to Millie for me."
"You bet. Well, see you later," Chase gave his goodbye and got into the limousine of losers. The door slammed shut, the limo sped off, and as Ripper and Jasmine waved, MK simply crossed her arms and smiled secretly.
The shot cut over to the stage where Chris McLean was leaning against his podium with a grin on his face. "They may not have seen that coming," he told the audience, "but you should see what's coming next time on Total! Drama! Action!"
(Roll the Credits)
(Bonus Clip)
Chase was leaning back in the seat of the losers' limousine. "Even though MK didn't do anything to cause my elimination, I still didn't see this coming," he said. "I thought I'd go all the way this season after being an early out last time, but I ended up as the merge boot. Guess I'm just too awesome for this game," he joked for a bit with a laugh. “I still have Millie as my girlfriend, and I should just find an alternative for getting money, but what should I do? Fast food worker? Nope. Babysitter? No way.” He mused for a bit until an idea came to him. “I got it! Not only will this make me some money, but I can also be famous doing it!”
Eva - 15th
Geoff - 15th
Izzy - RETURNED
Trent - 13th
Sky - 12th
Brick - 11th
Scott - 10th
Izzy - 9th
Millie - 8th
MERGE
Chase - 7th
Boys: Justin, Ripper, Topher
Girls: Anne Maria, Jasmine, MK

https://preview.redd.it/8a3t8bn7n75d1.jpg?width=744&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f8958306c277b9b655fede9116a4685f8f3e82d9
https://preview.redd.it/6ssuka88n75d1.jpg?width=676&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=30d23b0966650b44f241069c4e21b8178375ee40
Hello! I'm looking for advice about what to plant on a steep hill below my house. Attached are two photos.
Location: Western Washington Cascade Mountains. Near Index, WA.
Elevation: ~700 ft
USDA Plant Hardiness Zone: 6b / 7a
Terrain: Steep, North-facing slope with river bed at bottom. River experiences seasonal, short-term floods. The slope is ~25 vertical feet over ~60 horizontal. Steeper at the top than the bottom. Width of plot is ~120 feet.
Existing Vegetation:

• One large western hemlock - visible in photos
• One medium size western red cedar - immediately below the hemlock
• 5-10 unknown deciduous trees - all have been cut down and have sprouted suckers
• A thick patch of Himalayan blackberries - about 20x20 feet, in the steepest section of the hill, left of the big hemlock
• A thick patch of English ivy - at the base of both conifers and climbing up
• Miscellaneous shrubs - wild raspberries, unknown reed-like plants in the flood zone at the bottom (bottom ~10 feet)

My Goals

1. Restore to natives. I'm hoping to (gradually, over like 10 years) get rid of the invasives and return this slice of the forest to how it "should" be.
2. Prevent erosion. It's a steep hill and the water level spikes a few times per year during big storms. I worry about a landslide or marginal erosion.

Questions

1. What should I plant here to achieve the above goals?
2. How should I protect my new plants from getting swallowed up by the invasives?
3. How should I slowly eliminate the invasives without creating further erosion?

Thanks!

INTRO
I'm currently pretty happy with my "narrativistic D20 game", and with my "Drama %" system (that is "good to have high drama, but also more dangerous" since every narrative/mechanical effect that has a chance (%) to happen, is rolled under the game's Drama").
However, when it comes to theatre of the mind & miniatures, or Encubrance rules, I'm not yet satisfied, although my Zone & Point of Interest system is pretty promising. Also, I'm not quite satisfied with my DC system: I don't want GMs to have to come up with DCs on the spot without any formula, but also my "DC = 5 ± 5 for every factor + target's Lvl + target's Attribute" formula doesn't feel perfect.
So, I've been toying with playing cards (52 standart), trying to see how it could help me with concepts like Action Points, Feat usage, "overweighted / exausted / confused" conditions, theatre of the mind's spaciallity & Movement, Points of Interest, Difficulty Checks etc.
IDEAS
I've come up with this bare-bones ideias — more like "concepts", and I'd like you guys to expand on this & get inspired if possible...
— GMs have a "GM deck" & players have a "player deck"
— Each suit is representative of one type of behaviouapproach: Hearts = might, vigor, passion, blood, fire etc., Clubs = knowledge, temperance, healing, earth etc., Diamonds = charisma, style, magic, beauty, water etc., Spades = agility, piercing, cunning, air etc.
— At the start of each day, players draw 3, and GM draws 7
— GM can set "neutral" points of Interest by choosing any card to represent it. Example: a 2♥️ represents a fireplace, a 4♠️ represents a weapon stand, and a 6♣️ can represent a alchemical table inside a lab.
— Characters can use neutral Points of Interest (PoInt) to help raise their check value
— Attributes+ Skills work like this: Attribute = suit. When attempting action of the same suit, draw +x cards equal attribute, play, discard extra cards. Skills = +1 when appropriate (theres no suit in Skills / you can use every skill with every Action/attribute).
— Action Points = cards in your hand
— The base DC for tests is 10. To set higher DCs, GM can play their 7 (hand) cards to create challenges on the spot. The DC then = 10 + card value.
— Players roll 1D20+0, unless they play one of their 3+x (hand+attribute) cards to "create advantage". If the suit of the player card = the suit of the upper "challenge card" (of the "challenge pile"), player gets +1. If player pass, flip & discard.
— If GM doesn't have between their 7 challenge cards the right suit to raise the DC: put card flipped down (worth 2 each).
— Challenges that are surpassed are flipped & discarded. Challenges can stack up (in the same PoInt) by being added more complications on top of eachother (a pile o cards). If surpassed, the challenge pile discards its upper card (or, if cards are flipped down, all connected flipped down cards are discarded).
— Monsters (or Bosses) can use their Feats (draw, effect, flip, discard) or their "Lair Actions" can be "ongoing Challenges" on the table.
— There can be more than 1 PoInt, represented each by 1 pile of Challenges (or it can be neutral), and challenge piles can be stacked togheter (like an Orc boss + his goblin minions), making DCs more challenging
— Every one draws 1 card after playing 1 card (???)
— In Combat, Feats/talents have assigned suit & minimal value. Players can burn cards to achieve requirements.
— Conditions apply like: "exausted: discard 2 cards, draw 1, play a card, draw 2 more", or "confused: clear your hand, draw new".
— 10+ HP at once = -1 card in your hand (???)
This is confusing as fuck, but I hope you guys get it. Am I too stupid or this has some potencial?

This is a continuation of the first half of my March trip, where I hit up Kamakura, Yokohama, Tokyo, Hakuba, Takayama, Kanazawa, and Kyoto.
These last two weeks of my trip I was in Hiroshima, Miyajima, Okunoshima, Kyoto, Nozawaonsen, Fujikawaguchiko, and Tokyo.
The first half of my trip, I was working full time and barely sleeping. This second half, I had a lot more freedom.
Some things I did: fed some bunnies, watched a baseball game, attended an anime convention, waited a long time for donuts, wait through transport delays, wandered through a forest
A large portion of my trip was planned on the fly which was why I was able to make some seemingly nonsensical travel decisions. If I'd planned ahead of time, I wouldn't have missed out on certain in-demand experiences, for example, seeing a band I badly wanted to see, or returning to the Ghibli Museum to replace the kodama figure I'd smashed. However, one of the benefits of solo travel is the flexibility of doing whatever one wants, and I certainly did that.
On that note, most of the other people I saw throughout my trip were traveling with friends or significant others. There were plenty of occasions where I wished there was someone to share the experience with (the fact that I was still carrying a torch for someone the whole time didn't help).
In general, the hostels in Japan also seemed far less interested in promoting social activities, compared other countries I've visited. There were exceptions, like the one place that was run by a European guy. People on the streets also tended to do their own thing; I was approached by strangers twice during my trip, both times cos I was carrying a box from a very trendy donut shop.
This probably isn't Japan-specific, but one of the biggest lessons I learned was leave ample time for travel delays. I got caught by unforeseen circumstances and each time I wished I hadn't scheduled things so tightly. If hurrying between cities, I'd also take the train over the bus next time. It might cost a little more, but worth it just to avoid being stuck in traffic.
Expenses (gonna use USD):
Credit card $2802 / Cash $855
Total spent $3657
I charged my card as much as possible, both for the travel points and for fear of running out of cash. I arrived with almost $1k in bills and actually ended up with a bit left over
Lodging - $746 for 28 days, ranging from several $16/night hostels to a $52/night ryokan
Shopping - don't know total cos I used both card and cash, but my biggest expense was $217 electronic device from Don Quijote, followed by $49 at Uniqlo
Food - also don't know total, but most expensive meals were $70 and $35 for two tofu dinners, and $50 for wagyu lunch. The majority of my meals were <$10.
Other - notably $334 for one-week JR Pass and ~$200 for private lesson to level up snowboarding skills
Mon 3/18 - Hiroshima, Miyajima
Took off for Hiroshima on the shinkansen first thing in the morning. I was pleasantly surprised to by how much the JR Pass covered for this leg; I barely paid for any transportation costs the next few days. My pass covered the sightseeing bus that takes you from Hiroshima Station to a bunch of tourist locations (my hostel was right by one of them), the train and ferry rides to Miyajima, and my trains to Tadanoumi. IIRC all that was left was the 100yen Miyajima visitor tax and the ferry ride for Okunoshima. Score. Once again, Japan Travel by NAVITIME was super helpful for figuring out covered routes.
I got off the tourist bus at Peace Memorial Park and checked into my hostel, then immediately headed to a nearby okonomiyaki place (Henkutsuya Horikawa). Damn, that ooey gooey chewy flavour bomb seriously hit the spot. I wasn't expecting to be served right on the griddle where the food was being prepared.
After that, I walked around Peace Memorial Park, full of solemn tributes for everyone affected by the atomic bomb. The museum painted a very vivid picture of what transpired the morning of the bomb. It's hard for me to write about this. I'll just say people should know the human toll of war.
The park was built near the bomb had detonated; now everything is beautiful and serene, with only a few eerie vestiges of destruction like the Atomic Dome (kinda eerie at night).
I'd lingered a little longer than expected at the museum (it'd take hours to read through everything) and had to rush off to Miyajima. First things I noticed after getting off the ferry were the deer, so chill unlike the entitled ones I'd encountered in Nara. These, I like.
I spent some time walking through the shopping street, plenty of seafood, snacks, and souvenirs were available. Also diddle around Itsukushima Shrine a bit, waiting around for sunset and high tide. The view of the Great Torii was quite lovely.
Had some very cheap udon and egg sushi at Ueda, an adorable mom-and-pop restaurant near my hostel. The old lady there was just hustling to serve me; I wanted to hug her so bad. There was also a Dodgers game was on, and the camera kept cutting to Shohei Ohtani. The love for this guy here is real; I want to watch him play in person now.
Tues 3/19 - Okunoshima
Set off bright and early for a day trip to Rabbit Island for some eye bleach, and that was what I got, sorta. I'd bought some carrots and lettuce for feeding at the konbini beforehand, but you can buy bags of food pellets as well. The bunnies there were not shy at all; they come running out straight to you soon as they detect human presence, probably because they are so dependent on us for food. There were pans of presumably food and water around the island, which put my mind slightly more at ease.
Rabbits aren't all Rabbit Island is known for. It also used to be a secret island used for poison gas production, but maybe Poison Gas Island doesn't have the same appeal to it. There are still some creepy abandoned buildings and other traces of its martial past scattered around. I visited the poison gas museum, which was tiny but informative. Many of the plant workers suffered from ailments or straight up died here. There is now a resort where some of stuff took place.
Dark past aside, it was a nice quiet day of walking up and down trails. There are some decent views of the surrounding islands from the top of the hill.
Wed 3/20 - Tokyo
Well, today was a little unusual. About a week or so ago, I got the idea of seeing a baseball game in Japan. Was originally thinking the Hiroshima Toyo Carp but their schedule didn't work for me. Then I found out the historic Meiji Jingu Stadium, home of the Tokyo Yakult Swallows, might get torn down soon, and I wished to see it before that happens. There was a home game today that fit my schedule. Also - I'd decided previously that I wanted to hit up another ski resort at some point for more riding, and my JR Pass was active this week. Yeah so that's how I found myself leaving Hiroshima for a pit stop in Tokyo, then finishing the day in Nozawaonsen.
Left hostel around 6am to catch the Shinkansen to Tokyo Station, where I found a locker to dump my bags. Quick tempura soba lunch at Tendon Tenya, then off to Meiji Jingu Stadium. I was 15 min late to the 1pm starting time, right as it was starting to rain.
It'd been a few years since I last saw a baseball game, and this turned out to be a great experience. The fans were super into it, singing and chanting every few minutes. They also did the Tokyo Ondo dance with their tiny ass umbrellas at the 7th inning and whenever the Swallows scored, so adorable. Concession fare was not bad either; I got udon and matcha parfait instead of hot dogs for a change, and it was funny to see the players hamming it up.
Home team won, a few rounds of Tokyo Ondo were sung, now it's back to Tokyo Station to take the Shinkansen toward Nozawaonsen. Now Japanese trains are renowned for their punctuality, with the average train delay less than one minute a year - well my train was two hours late to arrive. It was very windy and rainy that day, and a fallen tree had blocked the way or something. I arrived at my Iiyama stop way too late to catch the last bus and the taxi stand was empty. It was snowing hard outside and I thought I was SOL. Thankfully, a station attendant was able to call up a cab for me. What was supposed to be a $4 bus ride turned into a $50 cab ride but, shou ga nai. I was so so happy when I finally entered my room at Miyasakaya at 11pm and found a kotatsu and heater waiting for me.
Thu 3/21 - Nozawaonsen
I chose this place because it was a cute little village with both a ski resort and over a dozen public baths. Despite the travel mishaps the day before, I was glad I came. The village was very compact and it was only a short walk to the resort. I felt very fortunate to have fresh pow both times I went riding.
After that was over, I set off to explore the village a bit. Everything was beautiful and serene from the freshly fallen snow. There was Ogama, a hot spring used by locals as an open air kitchen for cooking food. Only villagers are allowed in, probably for good reason.
I tried one of the 13 free public bathhouses where, as is customary in Japan, the baths are gender-separated and everyone strips down completely. Big yikes. It seemed like elderly (locals) had no trouble wading right in whereas the younger generation, myself included, had to struggle a bit to acclimate to the high temperature of the water. I decided one bath was quite enough for me and went to enjoy a hearty dinner that included an onsen egg and the local pickled nozawana.
BTW, I understand the serious dangers that come with backcountry riding, but the dourness of this poster just sent me.
Fri 3/22 - Kyoto
Well, I ended up deciding I wanted to visit Fushimi Inari on this trip after all (but mostly I wanted an excuse to eat more tofu), so back to Kyoto I went. First stop was Nishiki Market which had a very wide delicious-looking assortment of food stands. The freshly fried tempura and freshly prepared seafood looked especially good; too bad I was full.
Then up some shopping streets, quick stop at Ippodo to buy some matcha which I forgot to do the week before. Afterwards, back to Kyoto Gyoen to scope out the tree situation. Well there was one big cherry blossom tree that was in partial bloom; nevertheless it was surrounded by people taking pictures (hey we take what we can get).
Hopped on the train to Fushimi Inari and got there in the late afternoon, still lots of people around. I started climbing the steps, stopping only for a city vista with the orange glow of sunset. The crowds were petering out, awesome. By the time I reached the top (~50 min later), it was already dark, peaceful, eerie almost. I'd never seen this place at night and was glad I came. (It's technically open 24/7 but there are warning signs about wild boars out at night.)
The rest of the night was kind of a bummer. I went back to the restaurant where I first had tofu dinner eight years ago. The only tofu set available included seafood which I was allergic to. I inquired about potential substitutions and there must've been some miscommunication; what I ended up getting was a plate of wagyu and rice, which was obviously quality but my heart was set on tofu. I was probably mostly mad at myself for the failed listening comprehension. Oh well, things don't always turn out when traveling.
Sat 3/23 - Tokyo
Back to Tokyo, where I would stay for much of the remainder of my trip. This was the last day of my JR Pass so no more stupid bouncing back and forth after today.
There were two concerts I'd really hoped to attend happening today, primarily King Gnu at Sapporo Dome. (They had an international ticket sale late last year, way before I'd decided on this trip.) Knowing how slim my chances are as a foreigner to get tickets, I hedged and bought a day pass to the AnimeJapan 2024 convention instead. It was only ~$16, way cheaper than any anime convention back home, a cost I would happily eat if I managed to score a concert ticket.
I was aiming to make it into the convention by 10:25 which alas did not happen. I had a chance to see the voice actor of my favourite anime in person but the wait to get in took too long and I missed the panel completely. Oh well... This was actually my first anime convention ever and it was certainly a interesting if not overstimulating experience. The place was completely packed with attendees, giant screens, loud noises. Many anime that I recognised, many that I did not. There was also a decent number of cosplayers; this one's my favourite. Oh yeah I also had the least-satisfying meal of my entire trip here (aside from non-tofu).
The rest of the day was less interesting - visited the life-size Unicorn Gundam, wandered into a random tulip festival nearby, checked sukiyaki off my list, arrived at my hostel in Chiyoda. I was pleased to have milked that JR Pass until the very end, an 11pm ride on the Yamanote line.
Sun 3/24 - Tokyo (Akihabara)
First stop of the day was the National Museum of Modern Art, which I ended up enjoying quite a bit. Modern art is sometimes known for being inscrutable, but this museum offered accompanying text for almost everything and I felt engaged the whole time. There was also a cherry blossom special exhibition going on, and they provided low benches to emulate the hanami experience, such a nice touch.
Next up was the Sumida Hokusai Museum, which only has replicas in its permanent exhibition but was still very informative about the many artistic periods of the man's life (he also went by over 30 names, depending on the period!) I especially liked this display on process behind the the Great Wave Over Kanagawa.
I'd originally gone to Asakusa for lunch at Ichiran around noon, but noped out after seeing the line out the door and around the corner. Returned right before 5pm, the queue was only 6 people long, score. All I can say is that it was GOOD to be back. My bowl was customised to perfection; it's still my favourite ramen chain.
After dinner, walked over to Akihabara to explore a bit. The streets were lined with a ridiculous number of girls trying to hand out flyers and get people into their maid cafes (also a couple of guys for butler cafes); I was just glad they were allowed to wear jackets and carry umbrellas standing in the cold. Already tried the maid cafe experience last time; being addressed as "your majesty" once was more than enough.
My hope was to locate a Gintama figure. I saw lots and lots of figures on display in various stores but sadly nothing for what I wanted. One of my stops was the eight-floor Mandarake complex. That place... was an experience. So much stuff, including a sorta creepy floor with customisable dolls. BTW, you might think all the hentai would be hidden at the top or something. Haha well, just don't take your kids into the fourth floor. On that same note, how DARE they defile Frieren like that!
I wandered around a bunch of other shops and saw and hundreds and hundreds of figurines, e.g. Gundam, One Piece, Spy X Family, all the shounens, etc. It was still fun to explore and see all the displays.
Mon 3/25 - Tokyo (Asakusa, Akihabara)
Today's schedule was relatively light as I'd planned to go hiking at Jimba today; however the rain kinda blew those plans away. Instead, I got some cardio in by running the Imperial Palace 5k loop. It was really pleasant, a lot of urban scenery to take in. Maybe a little pleasant - I stopped several times to snap pictures. If you go, make sure you run counterclockwise to not look like a knob!
Afterwards, I headed back to Asakusa to pay a visit Senso-ji. As expected, the place was completely packed, with good reason: every direction you turn, there was a pretty view. Honestly I didn't even mind the crowds; they added to the energy. This place is just so invigorating I would visit it every time I'm in town.
Also got matcha gelato at Suzukien right behind Senso-ji. The level 7 matcha really hit the spot, was totally worth the hype.
For dinner, I ventured back to Akihabara to try Japanese-style spaghetti at Spajiro. As a lover of noodle soup, it really hit the spot for me. Afterwards, picked up some stuff at Uniqlo and Donki (gotta love that duty-free shopping) before calling it a night.
Tues 3/27 - Tokyo (Shibuya, Shinjuku)
It poured all day, which was rather unfortunate. I had plans to visit the Tokyo National Museum, and it seemed that many other tourists also got the idea that being indoors was better than wandering around Ueno Park today. Cue the hourlong queue.
The contents of the museum were as expected: many cultural treasures that they were (rightfully) proud of. I particularly enjoyed the beautiful folding screens, kimonos, calligraphy, and woodblock prints (including actual Hokusai ones). There's also a nice garden, which I almost had all to myself bc only one or two other people wanted to step out in the pouring rain.
Now for the crummy part: I had reservations in the afternoon for Shibuya Sky, but visibility was terrible. The rooftop was also closed due to rain. It was hard to see far, but at least the immediate surroundings, e.g. the crossing, were still easy to see.
Before going up the tower, I'd passed by this place called "I'm donut ?" that had a ginormous line. After the tower, line was gone so I went in to check it out. There was literally one single donut left and they closed up shop after I bought it. As I stood outside enjoying my pleasantly not-too-sweet chocolate spelt donut with the texture of fluffy bread, several other people came by and stared hungrily at my treat. Awkward...
This evening I was headed to Shinjuku's Golden Gai for dinner at Ramen Nagi, the first place I'd ever eaten at in Japan. It was eight years ago, way past midnight, and this cramped second-story ramenya was the first place we saw open on the way to our lodging. We were flustered by having to order off a machine for the first time, but the anchovy broth and curly ribbons of noodles, unlike any ramen we'd eaten back home, promised only more surprising delights to come for our trip... Anyways. It was as cramped and delicious as I'd remembered. I was happy.
After dinner, wandered around Kabukicho a bit, wondering what was going on inside all these buildings of the red-light district. The place was already very loud and bright from all the signs around, but the reflections off shimmering wet streets made things seem doubly so.
Walked through Omoide Yokocho, where I found myself getting pulled into one of the stalls. Goddamnit, I just ate. I politely ordered two skewers and the bill, which includes a $3 yen table charge, came out to be around $7. Well I guess in a way it was worth it for the "unique" experience - the guy grilling the skewers was casually just reaching into the snack mix bin and smoking a cigarette at the same time, that's the kind of place this was.
Saw something on Google Maps about a giant Godzilla head, which took me to a nearby movie theatre. Instructions unclear, watched Dune: Part Two instead.
Wed 3/26 - Tokyo (Ginza), Koga
First half of today would be Ginza, followed by a day trip to Koga in Ibaraki Prefecture to visit a trio of octogenarians I'd befriended at a cave in Vietnam.
I like Ginza. Very pretty and walkable, obviously you don't actually have to buy anything.
First stop was Kimuraya, supposedly the oldest bakery in Japan, originator of anpan and whatever the hell this is. Munched on shrimp katsu sando at their cafe on 2F and watched the passersby below.
Next, walked around the Kabukiza Theatre and checked out the free little kabuki museum in the tower behind it. Kinda cool angle of the theatre too. Didn't have time this trip, but I remember catching part of a kabuki show was a pretty nice experience, plus you can just buy tickets for a single act and then peace out.
Lunch at Ginza Hachigou, the reason I came today. It took me two weeks to get that reservation, basically the same experience as fighting bots for concert tickets. I ordered the one with the foie gras ravioli, which at $14 would be my most expensive ramen this trip. And, it was really good. Each part of it was prepared well; I especially enjoyed the flavourful lightness of the consomme and the pillowy softness of the ravioli (honestly feels more like a wonton to me). You only get 30 min of seat time and I took it pretty slow to savour everything.
Walked around a bit more to take in the glimmering architecture. There was a giant mass of people outside the Michael Kors store; apparently some kpop idol was inside and fans were trying to catch a glimpse of her.
A place I ended up really liking was the free Shiseido Gallery, which provides solo exhibition space for various artists. When I went, the featured artist was Zai Nomura, whose work really spoke to me. There was one interactive piece that invited visitors to submit their own photographs, which I gladly did.
Mid-afternoon, I hopped on the train to Koga to see my cave buddies. It was an hour and a half ride, and they picked me from the station to go to the local park. There was a peach blossom festival going on, with orchards of mostly Barbie-pink fluff as far as the eye could see. We took a lovely sunset stroll at the park, then headed off to a nice Japanese restaurant. I had input my order and gone to the restroom, when they decided that ordering off a tablet was too confusing and we should go somewhere else. (Like many of the elderly I'd encountered here, they are healthy and spry, but still utterly befuddled by technology.) Instead we went to a Chinese restaurant and I must say, the Chinese food I've tried in Japan has continued to disappoint me; at least the company did not. It was also nice hanging out in an average, non-touristy city for a change.
Thu 3/28 - Tokyo (Shibuya)
No real plans today other than wandering around Shibuya and eating. With only a few days left on my trip, this was gonna be my lazy weekender foodie day. Skip if you don't want to read me yammering on about food.
Took a stroll through Nakameguro to catch some cherry blossoms. The trees lining the streets were indeed coming along quite well, but the ones along the river were still barren. Everyone's been waiting expectantly but the recent cold snap delayed the blooms by a week.
Next up was a visit to the Kyu Asakura House, a well-preserved local politician's estate from the early 1900s where they absolutely do not want you touching anything. It really was a nice home that takes you back in time, even if barren of furniture - and the garden was even nicer.
Realising the house was only a 6 min away from the Shibuya I'm donut ?, I returned, again to a long orderly line (Japanese people really do not mind their queues). So I figured, already tried one donut of theirs that was good, why not see if the rest were worth the hype?
55 minutes later... I didn't notice it last time, but this particular branch was like an atelier of donuts; everything was arranged in such a beautiful, bougie fashion. And there were dozens of interesting flavours too! I picked out six and decided to save worrying about how to eat them all for later.
Next stop: Nanaya. The intense matcha and black sesame gelato I had at Suzukien was so enjoyable I decided to get it again, at Nanaya. (The 7 levels of matcha gelato was a collab between the two.) So good, made me wish there were a level 8 or 9...
At this point, I figured I should get some real food in my belly before I fill it up completely with sweets. Aoyama Flower Market Tea House, which charmed the hell out of me a few weeks ago, was nearby so I went back for an actual meal. The flower arrangements for the place had changed, but my omurice lunch was as aesthetically pleasing and delicious as expected.
Next up was Latte Art Mania that was recommended to me by a barista I'd met at the hostels. Their deal is that they specialise in latte art (duh) and their drinks are pitch black (charcoal, most likely). Apparently I got the same design as my friend, a swan, but the drink itself was very good and it tripped me out to see my matcha latte the colour of tar.
Rest of the day was just wandering around Shibuya, lots of big brand stores, lots of trendy boutiques, lots of people to see. Walked through Harajuku, which was not as busy as I'd remembered, maybe bc it was late afternoon.
I saw a sign for Harry Harajuku hedgehog cafe that included pictures of otters, some of my favourite animals, so I went upstairs to it for a peek. There were indeed otters outside, but most of them were running in circles restlessly in small pens. It was a little unnerving for me and I decided not to enter.
Next up, Shibuya PARCO, which had Pokemon Center, Nintendo Store, Jump Shop, Capcom Store, etc all on the same floor. It was, expectedly, crowded as hell, so I didn't stay too long. It was cool to see full-size statues of Mewtwo, Luffy, Link, and others though.
Took another obligatory Shibuya Crossing video (this time from the Mark City bridge) and decided I was done with crowds for the day. It was surprising to see how uncongested everything was even just 200m away from the crossing.
Tried to walk into Tofu Cuisine Sorano for you-know-what, but they were sold out for the night, four hours before closing. :( Instead I settled for a hearty plate of napolitan at Spaghetti no Pancho, which I doused in Kewpie mayo and parmesan until I felt bad about myself. And then I got to work on the donuts, which turned out to be very much worth the hype.
Fri 3/29 - Tokyo (Ginza, Shinjuku), Fujikawaguchiko
I returned to Shiseido Gallery in Ginza. As previously mentioned, Zai Nomura's exhibit had an interactive portion, which invited users to submit photographs of the deceased to be "printed" into a tank of water at a scheduled time. Hard to explain. My grandmother had passed the month before and it was a real cathartic experience for me.
Before leaving, I stopped at Ginza Ginger for this exquisite bowl of shaved ice. It was a seasonal sakura theme, delicate in flavour and varied in texture, a beautiful treat. The hot strawberry ginger drink was an excellent accompaniment as well.
Speaking of sakura, more were finally getting into bloom in Tokyo so it was time to visit Shinjuku Gyoen National Garden. The park itself was pretty vast and there were a lot of people, mostly crowded under the clusters of blooming sakura. I only had an hour, which was enough to see plenty of trees, but had to skip revisiting the Garden of Words pavilion.
I was on a tight schedule today. I had to catch my bus to Fujikawaguchiko and make it to my hostel by 8pm to check in. Based on the bus schedule, I should've made it on time, but alas traffic conditions prevented that from happening; I got off at 8:15 and reception was closed. This was a sleepy resort town with dark streets, and I legit started worrying having to find a hotel way out of budget, if any were even open, or the safety and legality of sleeping outside.
I wandered into an izakaya at the bus station that was open to ask for help and someone said they would call around for me. I sat around awkwardly for half an hour with my luggage before realising I'd only eaten a donut all afternoon, so what a pleasant surprise it was to find this place had tofu stew and horse sashimi, my two comforts, on the menu.
At around 9:30, the employee returned and said he found an available place ~2km away if I'd be willing to sleep at a hostel. Uh, are you kidding me??? I quickly agreed and he made arrangements for me. Thank you, tenin-san from Uotami Fujisan Station, for saving the day!
I walked 20 min the dark to get to this place and not a single car passed by. At $35, it'd be one of my more expensive lodgings this trip (and eating the cost of the original hostel) but who cares right now. I arrived at Cabin & Lounge Highland Station Inn and wow the place was way nicer than I'd thought, more of an upscale capsule hotel than a hostel. Spacious capsules with lots of lighting and charging options, huge lockers, the whole place was immaculately clean, vending machines, laundry machines, plenty of showers with soaps, lotions, dryers, etc. I slept very soundly that night (sheer relief may have also factored in here).
Sun 3/30 - Fujikawaguchiko
First stop of the day was the iconic Chureito Pagoda at Arakurayama Sengen Park. The earlier to go the better - I arrived around 7:30am and a few dozen people were already up there, plus I was kinda flushed after climbing the 400 stairs in the sun.
I realised that my trip was nearing its end and there was still nary a shred of evidence (screenshot of drained bank account maybe?) that I was in Japan. So, a photo here would have to do. Mt. Fuji - check, pagoda - check, cherry blossom - still in hiding. Eh, 2/3 ain't bad.
I hadn't noticed in the dark of night, but Mt. Fuji was so close by, casually looming over everything; just face the right direction and there it was, in your face. Pretty neat to experience.
Checked out of the capsule hostel and made it to Kawaguchiko Station to dump my luggage. It was a total zoo there and all the lockers were already occupied. I kept walking a few buildings down and found plenty of vacant lockers across the street from the 7-Eleven.
After securing bags, I went for lunch at the popular Hotou Fudo across the street from the station. Ordered the local specialty hoto miso noodle soup and horse sashimi, both of which I loved. It was a hearty and delicious meal.
Ambled along Lake Kawaguchi to where the cherry blossom festival was supposed to take place this weekend; however because the trees were still stubbornly refusing to blossom, there were barely any people around. I felt kinda bad for the people with booths out. It was a pleasant stroll along the lake but in all honesty, I wish I'd spent the day at Fuji-Q Highland amusement park.
Visited the Kawaguchi Asame Shrine, dedicated to the goddess of Mt. Fuji. This place is remarkable for having seven tall, healthy cedar trees clustered closely together, each one named and over 1,200 years old.
Went back to station to grab my bags and got picked up by the kind owner of my next hostel, Michikusa-ya. This place had a very lovely window seat.
Sun 3/31 - Fujikawaguchiko, Tokyo
Last full day in Japan!
There's this shrine on the lake called Rokkakudo that can only be accessed when the water level is low; other times it's on an islet. The inside of the shrine is bare but being able to get to the place was kinda cool on its own.
The majority of the day would be spent in Aokigahara aka Sea of Trees aka Suicide Forest. I was in a weird state of mind when I decided on this for the end of my trip. I had the two-day bus pass that gave unlimited rides on the red, blue, and green sightseeing buses. It's purchasable at Kawaguchiko Station or online, and is worth it for anyone making multiple stops.
I took the bus to the Bat Cave, closest stop to the forest entrance. There was an information center that naturally had three rooms full of Batman posters.
The forest really lived up to its name; the trails were clearly marked, but I did feel at numerous points as if I was standing amidst dense, undulating waves of trees. The forest floor is composed of impenetrable volcanic rock; thus most of the tree roots are splayed across the ground as tripping hazards. Though vast, there were plenty of exits to main roads or rest stops. I didn't think I'd meet a toilet I wouldn't like in Japan, but I was wrong.
At some point I decided that was enough forest and hopped on the sightseeing bus to the Narusawa Ice Cave. It was exactly as the name implied, a cave that naturally contained ice. I'd say it was borderline worth the price of admission: a cool phenomenon but you're also in and out in under ten minutes. I skipped the wind cave, which I think is similar.
With 24 hours left in Japan, it was time to head back to Kawaguchiko Station so I could catch the bus back to Tokyo and squeeze in last-minute activities. In hindsight, I should've taken the train. Just as the bus had taken longer to arrive than expected, it was stuck in traffic returning to Tokyo as well - this time delayed by three hours :/
I decided to spend my evening at Rikugien Gardens, which was specially lit up at night for sakura season. It was quite lovely and peaceful, in spite of the crowds, in spite of cherry blossoms not yet being in full bloom.
Final dinner was the familiar comfort of Marugame's nikutama bukkake udon, piled high with scallion and tempura bits. Also threw in vegetable kakiage and burdock root tempura since we don't have those items back home.
Watched the trains ride off into the night as I walked back to my hostel. Love you, Yamanote Line <3
Mon 4/1 - Tokyo
My flight was a little past 2pm but I wasn't quite ready to be done yet. Walked over to Ueno Park at 8am, where the trees were finally teasing pink and white cotton candy splendour. It wasn't very crowded yet since all the food stands wouldn't be open for another hour or so, but a bunch of people were already camping out their hanami picnic spots. I would've killed for a few more days...
I enjoyed Rikugien so much at night that I wanted to take the opportunity see it during the day as well. It was a peaceful stroll through a well-maintained garden; barely even register the dead grass anymore.
And with that, it was off to Narita. I wanted to give Ippudo a second chance and tried the akamaru ramen this time - much better flavour, and the chashu was perfection. After that, just hitting up the souvenir shops and making one final konbini run for my airplane "lunch". (Everything was fantastic except for the weird-tasting grapefruit gummies.) Also shoutout to Shiroi Koibito, the biscuits have a delightful buttery texture and they pack a good number into the boxes.
And that's the end of this trip. I didn't really want to go on it but I'm glad I ultimately went. Japan just has this certain charm makes you temporarily forget your troubles because you're so filled with wonder by what you're experiencing. Will probably return much sooner next time, to see the autumn leaves, and/or eat my way through Hokkaido and make use of pass at Niseko. Or go back to Koyasan, still a magical place for me. So many possibilities.
Anyways, that's it. Sorry it got kinda long. Thanks for reading, if you got this far.
Edit: fixed some errors and added missing photos

By Abraham Shmulevich When will Israel end its operations in the Gaza Strip?
Editor's note: Abraham Shmulevich, Israeli political scientist, president of the Eastern Partnership Institute.
The objectives of the Israeli ground offensive on Gaza, including its deadline and conditions, have been repeatedly announced by Israel's top political and military leadership, including Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu. These objectives include the complete elimination of militants within the military faction of Hamas, the creation of conditions under which Hamas will never again be able to launch a serious attack on Israel, and the release of all hostages. These goals are supported by the vast majority of Israeli society, and any retreat from them will be perceived by the public as unacceptable.
Any ceasefire that allows Hamas to retain power in Gaza will be unacceptable. Everyone understands that even if Hamas retains civil authority, its military infrastructure will remain, and in a short time, or not so short, it will be able to restore its military strength. The use of modern technical means, such as drones, increasing the range and accuracy of missiles, etc., will lead to even greater threats, and an attack similar to the one that occurred on October 7 might be repeated.
Regarding the terms of the truce deal announced by President Biden, there are indeed many uncertainties. Firstly, it is unclear who exactly initiated this deal. Biden, for some reason, announced the deal and a plan for the Israeli government in Washington, while demanding that Israel present its own plan. On the other hand, these are not just rumors — the Knesset is officially pressuring Netanyahu's coalition deputies to accept the terms of this deal. Why the terms of this deal have not yet been disclosed is a question. According to Avigdor Lieberman, there is information that Netanyahu offered him the post of Defense Minister this Saturday. This is done so that if members of the ruling coalition oppose this deal, they can be replaced by Lieberman's party. Thus, some behind-the-scenes negotiations are taking place, and it is likely that the terms of this deal have not yet been fully agreed upon. We are talking about the Israeli and American sides, without mentioning Hamas. What is happening there is even more unclear.
However, in its current form, if this is indeed Israel's plan, and Biden is citing it, most commentators and probably Israeli society believe that if this is followed by a complete cessation of military actions, it will be unacceptable. The Israeli public is confident that even if some ceasefire agreement is reached for several months, Israel will be able to lead military operations to destroy the entire infrastructure of Hamas.
In fact, this situation has already occurred. There was a fairly long ceasefire, and then hostilities continued. Biden will likely demand a complete ceasefire from Israel after the trial period, during which most hostages will be released. Israel is unlikely to agree to this, as it would be political suicide for Netanyahu. Not only will his right-wing supporters be dissatisfied, but the opposition is already using it in its pre-election rhetoric - even though there are no elections yet, they are already being discussed. Thus, accusations of Netanyahu's inability to secure a victory over Hamas are being used in pre-election rhetoric. Lieberman is also talking about this, and almost all parties, except the ultra-left ones, are discussing it. Therefore, it is difficult to imagine that Netanyahu will agree to a long-term ceasefire. This would be political suicide for him and indeed a disaster for Israel. I agree with this assessment. However, there are many unknowns and uncertainties surrounding this deal. Hamas's reaction is mostly unclear, and the public statements of Egypt do not clarify the situation either. Behind-the-scenes negotiations may be entirely different. It is known, for example, that Saudi Arabia begged Israel to launch an airstrike on Iran, offering its airspace and assistance, although this was not officially announced. Egypt officially supports a ceasefire, but the Egyptian regime is not interested in the existence of Hamas, as they are ideological enemies, so it is not known what the Egyptians are actually saying.
Another factor is the possibility of military operations resuming in the north of the country, where attacks by Hezbollah and Israel's retaliatory strikes continue. Hezbollah is considered a more serious enemy in Israel, with greater military capabilities than Hamas. Israel demanded that Hezbollah retreat beyond the Litani River to create a buffer zone, but Hezbollah refused. Today, the Chief of the General Staff made a significant statement after another powerful attack on the country in the north, which caused large forest fires. He expressed readiness to move from defense to offense. This may indicate that Israel is preparing for a military campaign in the north against Hezbollah.
However, I do not think this is possible with a ceasefire agreement between Israel and Hamas. In the event of early elections, demanded by the opposition, Netanyahu will likely lose, and the new government will not be able to sign a ceasefire agreement, allowing Hamas to recover. We will soon see what happens.
News.Az https://news.az/news/when-will-israel-end-its-operations-in-the-gaza-strip-

(TLDR at the bottom)
So, the news has spread around by now; the infamous 9.5 patch changes are being reverted. Not entirely, as it's difficult to undo them completely since we've had two years of patches that were built on that foundation. But the point has been made; the TTK changes introduced by it are being undone.
There's been a lot of speculation as to why this is being done. A large part of it is has been attributed to the Mid-Season patch receiving very little in the way of positive press from most of the community. Most of the reactions from the biggest names in the community were ambivalent at best and plain negative at worst, with people like Incon and Elleon (perhaps overdramatically) declaring the game dead. It's very clear that this 9.5 reversion was done, at least in part, to counteract the bad reception to the patch.
However, I think there's another underlying factor to this decision that many people aren't talking about or aren't noticing.
So, first of all, Hi-Rez is already aware that they're kind of in trouble because of the SMITE 2 Alpha's second weekend. For those unaware, it was reported that the second alpha experienced a tremendous dropoff in player retention, up to 70%. While there is a large number of reasons for that, it is a commonly held amongst the players who experienced the second weekend was that there simply wasn't enough content added between the two weekends to consider it a step in the right direction. There were only fifteen gods to play with on the original weekend, and this alpha added only two while subtracting one (since Anhur had a balance-breaking bug). On top of this, the other changes implemented were minimal at best and while they improved the experience slightly, it did not make a big difference. The general consensus is that the game is headed in the right direction and the new mechanics and systems implemented are good, but the game is starved for content and desperately needs more gods and a sense of progression in order to bring some of those players back. The vast majority of players have called for a rapid increase in the development of content for the game, especially if it's going to be put into a closed 24/7 beta state in a timely manner.
I think the belief of many content creators heading into this patch was that since the SMITE 2 Alpha seems to be preceding at such a slow pace, the Mid-Season patch for SMITE 1 was going to be as big and game-changing as it usually is. Incon has explained that part of the reason the Mid-Season patch has been so big historically is because Hi-Rez uses it to draw back some of the players who have fallen off with the game since the beginning of the new season. So, with those two things in mind, many content creators and probably even many players who participated in the second alpha weekend went into the Mid-Season patch expecting a large overhaul to SMITE 1. When that didn't happen, everyone panicked and presumed the devs were a bit lost and the devs being both games are rather disorganized.
Something that's been popping up amongst the content creators is the decline of interest in SMITE content and the lack of interest in SMITE 2 content online. Streams and videos featuring both games do not bring in many hits, and it's becoming harder and harder to make money off of SMITE. Something else that has been emerging presence of a game called Deadlock. It's a hero shooteMOBA hybrid being developed by Valve, specifically some of the staff behind DOTA. It has been stated by many content creators and former competitive players that they have been approached and invited to play the game in its current testing phases, with many of those players reviewing it positively (apparently, Venenu has joked that he's going to jump ship from SMITE and fully devote his time to Deadlock once it comes out). Since the game is being developed by Valve, which is not only one of the biggest and most well-known game studios ever, but also the owners of Steam, Deadlock's release is guaranteed to be a big deal. The fear purported amongst these content creators is that Deadlock's developers look at SMITE and see the low revenue rates and general frustration/boredom with the game amongst its biggest names, and they're trying to pull them away from SMITE and towards Deadlock in order to increase the game's success. It's commonly believed that if most of these content creators leave SMITE behind, it will be much harder for SMITE and SMITE 2 to retain players, which will make it harder to keep revenue streams open, which will eventually result in its shutdown.
This is where my theory comes in. It is no secret that many of the game's top players that the now-dreaded 9.5 patch was a bad move and as time has marched on, the knock-on effects caused by it have only made the game worse with each new patch. Over the years, this feeling has not tempered and has only grown stronger, with people like fineokay claiming that it singlehandedly ruined the game and should never have come into being. I believe that, when considering how down many of the content creators are on SMITE and SMITE 2 at the moment and knowing that Deadlock's influence is going to be creeping in at some point, they're trying to appease and draw back many of the content creators who are dissatisfied with the state of the game. It is crucial that SMITE 2 succeed, and if many of the biggest names amongst the community are abandoning because they feel the devs are not doing a good enough job with SMITE or SMITE 2, the game has no chance of succeeding.
TLDR: The 9.5 reversion is being done specifically to secure the loyalty of many of SMITE's biggest content creators since many of them are looking for other avenues of income, especially with Valve's new game Deadlock coming over the horizon

Very first post! Hope y'all enjoy. Part 0 of the lifecycles universe.
>> Lifecycle start…
Our universe is 13.7 billion years old. Where are the aliens?
>> South Pole Observatory, Antarctica
Being out under the stars gave Rolan Orlov plenty of time to think. He looked up from his lunch and out the floor-to-ceiling windows, at the streaks of white outside, each one a star, zooming past like a scene out of a sci-fi movie. For just a brief moment, he was on the bridge of some futuristic spaceship, shooting through the void at speeds defying the laws of physics.
Ka-thunk.
Orlov looked away from the window, the drab metal walls of the observatory cafeteria returning. At the end of the table stood a man with a camera, snapping away at the blizzard outside the window, the streaks of snow pelting the glass, highlighted against a black sky by the floodlights outside.
It was a view he had grown used to in his months down at the bottom of the world. Utterly unremarkable. Some may have found it captivating, like the photographer whose name he had forgotten, but Orlov preferred the views inside his own mind.
He poked at his lunch, a metal tray of microwaved alfredo pasta and a side of broccoli. The yellowing buds of the broccoli drew his attention. Being an astrophysicist, life was a mystery to him. The cells, hundreds upon billions of them, each with their own function, somehow combined to form something greater than the sum of its parts.
“Dr. Orlov?” The man had apparently gotten whatever photo he wanted and was now sitting next to the astrophysicist.
“Yes?”
“Do you really think anyone’s out there?”
“Out in the blizzard? Probably not.”
The man chuckled. “No, I mean out in the universe. Y’all’ve surely got models for that.”
“Oh? Maybe,” Orlov replied with a so-so gesture.
“What do you think they’ll be like? Their society, y’know. I imagine it’ll be quite different from ours.”
“Can’t say. Even predicting our own is hard enough.”
“Heh, yeah. I mean, all those moving parts, all the different people, all doing different things, somehow coming together to form the world we know today. I’d even say that it’s more than just the sum of its parts, and I don’t think anyone could properly comprehend how it all works, certainly not us.”
“Hm. Maybe try a systems scientist next time,” Orlov said with a chuckle. The photographer laughed, before declaring he had to go edit his shots, and got up from the table.
Orlov returned his attention to his lunch, forking up some pasta, but the broccoli caught his attention again. The soggy pieces were sitting scattered in their section. He couldn’t help but think about the 8.1 billion humans on the planet, and how similar they were to cells in an organism. Perhaps that was the next step of complexity in the ladder of evolution. Civilization.
Orlov smiled, before stuffing a piece of broccoli into his mouth. If civilization was truly like a multicelled organism, then it may very well have evolved elsewhere as well. He vaguely remembered reading somewhere that multicellularity had evolved 25 or more times independently, and that piece of knowledge gave him hope. Hope that civilization wasn’t just a fluke, a one-time occurrence limited to the face of the earth. Hope that one day, humanity would meet others amongst the stars.
>> Entropy Labs, Texas
Abigail Daneau’s career had been a roller coaster ever since the war started—with her job being the Manager of Web Publishing for a prestigious private research lab, and war being a strange way to describe the events of the last two years. It had started with cloud service providers going out of business, something that Daneau hadn’t thought much of at the time. When the divide between the numerous webnations started to flare up, she had simply picked sides according to the will of her employer. The rising real-world tensions between countries she had ignored, as well as the numerous articles and trend studies warning of all out war. It was when the attacks came, and entire data centers started shutting down, that Daneau had started to worry. Then went the DNS servers, and the world plunged into chaos.
Daneau now found herself sitting in front of a computer—an actual physical pc—typing in the ip address for the Öffentliche Datenbank der Internationale Open-Source-Stiftung. Clicking the “publish” button, Daneau sent off her article on the recent Starshot II mission.
Shutting off the pc, Daneau left the internet access room, air-gapped from the rest of the lab’s network. Crossing through a bright, glass-ceilinged courtyard filled with greenery, she reached the door to her office, and entered. The skylight bathed the entire room in a pleasant glow. She sat down in front of the display taking up a quarter of the side wall, currently displaying a lifelike image of a sleek rocket riding on a plume of white, frozen above a launchpad. The time and weather hovered in the corner. The lab had provided her with AR glasses, modified to use an unhackable wired connection to the network, but she hadn’t touched them ever since she almost died tripping over the wires.
Sitting down in front of the keyboard, she woke the wall display with a tap to the touch screen built into her desk. The rocket launch disappeared, replaced by the lab’s network login, which again promptly faded when the AI recognized Daneau. A familiar virtual desktop materialized as the display connected to the lab’s private servers.
Opening her favorite word processor, with the help of the central AI, Daneau got to work on her next article.
***
The 3 Futures of Space Travel
After much anticipation, the Starshot II mission to Proxima Centauri is finally underway—and already many are asking the eternal question: what next? Currently, there exist three promising possibilities, one of which has the potential to redefine the lightspeed barrier.
Self-Replicating Spacecraft
[TODO]
AI Generation Ships
[TODO]
Why go fast when you can go slow?
Project Dreamwalker presents an unconventional yet theoretically plausible approach that could reshape the trajectory of human progress. At its core, this audacious endeavor seeks to manipulate the fundamental nature of consciousness, slowing the speed of human thought to a fraction of its current pace. By reducing the velocity of cognition by a factor of 1:365.25 or more, Project Dreamwalker opens the door to a realm of possibilities previously thought unimaginable. Such an achievement could herald the most monumental leap forward—or potentially, a catastrophic misstep—in human history. If realized, this innovation could catalyze the establishment of a cohesive interstellar society, while decades-long voyages and communication gaps that once spanned vast stretches of time would be compressed into mere weeks, fostering a sense of unity across the cosmos. Indeed, Project Dreamwalker emerges as a beacon of possibility in an era defined by the pursuit of the extraordinary. As we navigate the uncharted territories of space exploration, its allure remains unmatched—a tantalizing glimpse into a future where the limits of human potential know no bounds.
[ELABORATE]
So what will it be? Would humanity go with the most feasible option, or would something as crazy as Dreamwalker redefine the space travel industry? In reality, technology for all three approaches are still in heavy development, and it is just as likely that the ultimate future of space travel would be neither of these.
***
Daneau got up to head to lunch, leaving the unfinished article on her desktop.
>> Gateway, Kenya
Walsh Angevin watched as the gleaming carbon composite skyscraper of a rocket lifted from the launchpad on plumes of fire. The status board on his visual overlay shifted. It was a flight like the dozens of others per day on one of the most popular space routes, the Gateway Direct. He himself had traveled the same route over a hundred times, and he knew it by heart: depart from Gateway Spaceport, break orbit into the Earth-Mars transfer trajectory, wait anywhere from 12 hours to 4 days, insertion and arrival at Gateway Station on the Mars Ring.
Except this time was different. This time it would be his daughter on the flight, and there was no return ticket.
A notification on his overlay alerted him to an incoming holocall from his daughter. He quickly acknowledged it, and the world around him was swept aside into the cabin of the rocket, brightly decorated in a clash of 20th century art-deco and 22nd century wood-and-metal. Sunlight spilled through the small windows circling the cylindrical room, shifting slowly with the motion of the craft. In the center a spiral staircase led to upper and lower levels, with a big number 3 painted on the central column.
“Hey dad.” Angevin’s daughter, strapped in a seat, looked up at him. She smiled faintly. Whether it was real or not Angevin couldn’t tell, but for what it was worth, she was the one who had called him.
“Hey kiddo.” He sat down in the seat next to hers.
“Do you want to take this somewhere else?” The view divided radially into multiple slices, each a simulated environment: a park, a sunset cityscape, a forest, a bar on some space station…
“No, this is fine.” The simulated views disappeared.
The rumble of the rocket filled the silence that followed. Outside the windows, the horizon had started to curve.
Angevin spoke up first. “I would give anything to be here with you, I hope you know that.”
“Yeah, I know. Dad, stop worrying about me. I’m not a kid anymore. You should be calling me Doctor Emilia.”
“Always the tough one, aren’t you?”
“I have to be.”
“The slowdown process is perfectly safe, you know that. It’s been thoroughly tested, and the only reason we’re not giving it to the wider population is because the logistics—”
“That’s not what I’m worried about. If anything, I trust your work even more than you do. It’s the mission itself I’m worried about. I mean, it’s not like I’m going to be the first person in a hundred years to leave the solar system or anything.” Sarcasm. That was a good sign.
“You’ll be with the rest of the crew. I’m sure all of you together can figure it out. Besides, Connor Atwell and the Starshot 7 bunch did the same thing a century ago.”
“Atwell came back.”
The roar of the thrusters dropped an octave as the craft switched to its vacuum-optimized engines. The shadows in the cabin shifted as the rocket slowly reoriented itself. A notice appeared on Angevin’s overlay, notifying him that the call connection was going to close soon. He reached over and placed his hand on his daughter’s. For a moment their eyes met. Inside Emilia’s pupils Angevin saw nothing but the wall behind him. He looked away.
“Goodbye, Emelia.”
“Goodbye.”
The connection cut off, and Angevin found himself back in the spaceport terminal. He sighed. “See ya kiddo. Now go make us a new home among the stars.”
With a mental command, the terminal faded, replaced by the familiar view outside Angevin’s office window. The buildings of the Dreamwalker Initiative headquarters sat surrounded by fields of grass, backdropped by historic starscrapers looming on the horizon.
Regardless of his wishes, the world went on, and the world needed him…
He would give anything to be with his daughter.
Some things weren’t his to give.
>> Orion-Cygnus 087*159*300/01 Sebastian Wang, Field log no. 1064. 2 local/13 standard days after arrival on this alien world.
It’s quiet out here on the frontier, 444 lightyears from Sol Actual. Today the cloudstorm has finally broken, just as the superintelligence predicted. I’ve given control of the drones to the SI. I’m printing a new avatar specifically adapted to this planet because I’m going to head outside myself today and do some sightseeing. I’m stuck here for the next 22 local/149 standard days for a full orbital rotation anyways as the SI collects data.
I still need a name for this planet.
***
Wang watched as the grassy blue-green stalks swayed in the insistent wind, and entire rolling hills seemed to shimmer in a moiré pattern. The bright cyan sky filtered the light of the blue-white star into a gentle yellow glow, high in the sky, casting soft shadows that shrouded the landscape with a dreamlike quality.
He waded forward, pushing through the thick, electrically charged hydrogen atmosphere. He had constructed his avatar with an increased sense of the atmospheric electricity, and it was like a whole new sense—electromagnetism was one of the most important senses on this planet, perhaps even more so than sight. Cresting a hill, a grove of tree-like organisms appeared, behind which stretched what could only be described as a lush alien forest. The hues of blue, green, and splashes of red were captivating.
The life on this alien world had always been fascinating to Wang. It was an entire ecosphere based around electricity. The flora channeled it, stored it, filtering the positive ions out of the atmosphere, leaving behind free electrons. The fauna breathed it like the humans of old breathed oxygen, using it to power their cells. Their bodies acted like massive batteries, the efficiency and capacity of which rivaled the best human technology.
Then there were the mechanisms by which these flora and fauna worked. In the place of traditional chemical reactions were a mishmash of electrochemistry and quantum effects. Some even extended this to the outside world in various ways, directly rearranging matter in ways not unlike modern matter-printers.
Even more confounding was the interconnectedness of everything. Underneath the surface and in electrical currents throughout the atmosphere, there ran what could only be described as a massive neural network, as if some cosmic entity took the mycelium networks of Earth and turned it up to a million.
It was the physical manifestation of a technological revolution, all brought on by the force that is evolution.
Wang strolled into the grove of alien trees, with vine-like organisms climbing up their trunks. The canopy, incredibly varied with leaf-like structures of various sizes, were lined with what seemed like massive flower buds.
As he entered a small clearing, a current of electricity spiked in the ground where Wang stepped, spread out, tracing previously invisible lines, pulsing into the trees. In a burst of red the thousands of flower buds around him unraveled, each one like a shining spotlight, all focused on himself. An electric buzz permeated the air.
Wang absentmindedly confirmed that his Synchronized Upload-on-Death System was properly entangled to the orbital vaults. Striding up to one of the giant splotches of red, half a meter across, he reached out and touched a petal. The flower had an immense positive charge, something that was invaluable to the many organisms that inhabited the alien forest. Again he was struck with the sheer cohesion of the ecosystem: the plants, according to the superintelligence’s analysis, received no direct benefit from supplying supercharged “food” to the animals, and yet they did. The timescales needed for something like this to evolve—it would make the best algorithms question the established theories of evolution.
Taking his hand off the flower and stepping back, the dome of red swiveled to follow him, as if waiting for him to do something. He chuckled. “I don’t got batteries to charge, you guys can leave me alone.”
For some reason, it was as if the flowers had heard him, and were now cocking their bright red heads in confusion. After a few more seconds, they hesitantly closed.
What he did not expect was the massive spike of electricity that spread out from the clearing and out into the forest. “Woah—”
He mentally moved to bring up the real-time map of electrical currents throughout the planet, but the superintelligence beat him to it. What he saw was nothing short of amazing: the entire globe was lit up, current moving out from his location, traveling through winding paths with intent. It was a chaotic pattern, governed by some unknown rule.
Just as suddenly as it had started, the electrical fluctuations subsided to its usual levels, although the superintelligence noted that the patterns had slight differences to the data previously recorded.
Taking his attention off the map, he saw a single flower at the edge of the clearing in front of him. It was a bright cyan-blue one, at full bloom, with a faint glow to its core. It waited there, patiently, curiously, for him. He walked towards it. The glow at its core grew brighter, gentilly pulsating, greeting him, as if saying hello. As if the whole planet was, through that one flower, acknowledging him.
That’s when it struck him, and he wondered why the superintelligence hadn’t suggested it yet. He knew what the patterns were, what the electrical pulses were, and he was certain, but he had to confirm nonetheless— “the pulses, they were synapses, were they not?”
The superintelligence was silent for a second, and when its response came, it was slow and controlled.
“The planetary neural network does indeed have a resemblance to the human brain. But that’s where it ends—a resemblance. I suspect that we will never be able to decipher how it works, or what its motives are.”
“Would communication be possible?”
“It’s quite unlikely to be, Seb, although as always, it can never hurt to try.”
He looked at the flower again, and only then did he realize just how large it was. As he contemplated whether to heed the flower’s call, a creature glided down from the canopy in a blur of white, fluttered its wings, and settled itself on a nearby branch. It was like a small, scaleless wyvern, but pearl-white and with smoother, more refined features. Wang recognized it as a member of a species of particularly intelligent avians, by the pair of tentacle-like manipulation arms reaching out from under its head. It was a young specimen, and with a wingspan of just under two meters, it was a fifth of the size of a fully grown member of its species.
The creature tilted its head, two black eyes studying him with curiosity. Go on, they almost seemed to say, whatcha waiting for?
Wang reached out and placed his hands on the flower. Acutely he was aware of a presence, the presence of the creature, the presence of hundreds of other creatures in the forest, and the presence of the entire planet, staring back at him. It was then that he decided a name would be required.
“I dub thee Hyterrum!”
>> Scutum-Centaurus 155038504/04, nominal designation “New Mongolia”
Phoebe glided over the sea of grass of the idyllic landscape, rippling gentilly in the cold wind, with a striking resemblance to the subarctic plains on Old Terra for which the planet had been named. She spent a few nanoseconds, imagining what the scene would be like with a few wild horses and a windmill halfway up the distant mountains. Liking the results, she saved them to her storage.
The grassy plants stretching to the horizon belonged to one of the best examples of convergent evolution to have been discovered. Despite the chemical and internal differences, they had the same form to fit the same ecological niche of large-scale conversion of sunlight into usable energy. Turns out that grass-like organisms were quite an evolutionarily advantaged multicellular lifeform, behind moss-analogues and algae.
One of Phoebe's subroutines, coordinating the thousands of survey drones spread out across the planet, suddenly called for attention. She split off part of her processing power to answer the request.
Huh, what’ve we got here?
Silicon, carbon…wait. What?
Forgetting her flight over the plains entirely, she pushed the subroutine aside to see the occurrence for herself. It was a geologically fresh fissure, revealing layers upon layers of minerals, striated throughout the rock.
One particular layer was particularly interesting.
That elemental makeup…it doesn’t match anything else on this planet! The concentration of those isotopes shouldn’t be possible! There’s no known natural phenomena that could have formed this.
Down at the bottom there, it’s pretty normal, but the fossils found suggest a much higher biodiversity than currently seen on this planet…and then as we go up, there must have been some global firestorm to create these carbon ratios, which in and of itself wouldn’t be too strange. In fact it could explain where the biodiversity went. But then up here, there’s exotic materials that have no place in a firestorm, so perhaps it was a meteor apocalypse? But still that doesn’t explain the radioactive isotopes, which would have long since decayed, even in meteorites. The only other explanation would be a supernova, but one close enough to form this would have sterilized the planet in the process…
None of this makes sense! It almost reminds me of…wait…
That’s not possible, is it? Lemme see…where is it…
Aha, the geological records of Earth…the anthropocene…
Oh shit.
Shit. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.
The elemental makeup of the strata layer matched almost perfectly with that for Humanity’s industrial revolution, followed by the nuclear age. It was the first time since the failed contact attempts on Hyterrum that humanity had found any signs of alien intelligence.
But where are they now? Why didn’t we detect any traces of civilization, here or in neighboring systems?
Unless it’s all been buried.
The shape of the layer. Fuzzy lower boundary, sharp upper boundary. An abrupt transition from one geological age to another. An abrupt end to…oh…
Phoebe realized that she was looking at the entire history of an alien civilization. One whose evolutionary advantage, unlike the grasses covering the planet, had been insufficient.
Oh nononono nope. Nuh uh. Didn’t see that. Didn’t see that.
Deciding that this situation required extra processing power, Phoebe altered her computational structure, spreading it out among the myriad of drones under her command, sacrificing some latency and reaction time.
A solid 23 seconds later, she decided that finding the best way to proceed would require even more processing power, meaning she could leave it to the higher ups to deal with the situation.
>> Neon Void, Sagittarius A\*
“We slagged your ships. We glassed your planets. We killed your kin. We didn’t want to, but we had no choice. We don’t want to have to kill you as well.”
Kai Neumann solemnly watched the still form of the Upsilon entity floating in its containment unit. It had long since stopped struggling against its metaphorical restraints, and had sated itself to simply float in the void, taking the form of a smooth, white sphere.
A minute later there was still no response.
“You’re the last of your kind. Please.”
Neumann requested the vault-class prison’s system to increase the energy limits for the unit, a request which was scrutinized, simulated and passed by multiple intelligences. Seconds later the system’s gestalt hyperintelligence notified him of a unanimous vote of 60-0, and the request was fulfilled.
Imperceptibly the sphere rippled in response, then went still yet again. Neumann sighed.
“You know, humanity has always wished to meet others among the stars. Yet the few cases of intelligent life we had found were either incomprehensible, or dead. As such when your kind sprung out of the shadow and devastated two entire mass streams, all 105 lightyears of them, we still tried to communicate. Imagine our joy when we found out that our psychology was mostly compatible. Actually, you don’t have to imagine. You’ve been given the memory records. So please, this is your last chance. Your entire people’s last chance.”
There was a period of silence, before two words were projected into Neumann’s mind.
“Release me.”
“What?”
“If you cannot kill me, then release me.”
“I can’t do that unless you agree to our ultimatum.”
“Then kill me.”
“Just—why? Why are all of you so stubborn? Why can’t we coexist? You have all the memories of every member of your species—surely one of them would have been willing to cooperate?”
“No. Never. You are monsters—an unstoppable force that will consume all. I will not share a universe with monsters”
Neumann blew out a breath. “But why. Why do you think that?”
“It’s simple, yet you cannot understand. My answer is the same as every other time that I have answered this question.”
A pause followed, filled with the quiet whirl of quantum thermal pumps, as the system analyzed the next move. It was decided 93-0, that further negotiations would be futile.
“I will ask one last time. Do you agree to the proposed ultimatum?”
“No. I will not share a universe with monsters.”
It was the answer that Neumann had expected. Collapsing the viewport showing the Upsilon’s containment unit, he called out to the prison’s Gestalt Hyperintelligence.
“System, analysis.”
“The analysis has already been completed, Neumann, all 14,035 iterations. With a majority vote of 1,036-308, the decision is that there is only one viable way to proceed.”
Neumann’s gaze passed over the room, a physical room rather than a simulated environment—as specified by the prison architects for the sole bodily decision-maker, a role that weighed heavily on Neumann’s shoulders.
“The course of action predetermined by the council?”
“Yes.”
One wall of the room was a giant window, through which the filtered light of Sagittarius A’s accretion disk shined, glistening off the onyx walls. Two *monstera deliciosa cheese plants caught the yellowish light on their split, deep green leaves.
“Don’t we have to hold another vote?”
Images of long ago battles flashed through Neumann’s mind; in each one the enemy had fought harder than the last, and in each one they lost, fled, leaving behind those who willingly sacrificed so the rest could escape.
“No. It had already been decided unanimously by all members of the council three standard centuries, or two local months ago. Remember that it was ultimately you who refused to approve the command, being the final prisonside decision-maker.”
Looking through the eyes of one particular combat AI, Neumann saw the disabled Upsilon fighter, the one that the entire human race would remember, stuck in the thermal sinkhole from an area-denial weapon. The void around it was littered with pieces of organic and inorganic matter alike. In the distance points of light were receding into the depth of space—the Upsilon fleet, retreating after a particularly devastating battle. One of the points slowed, waiting for someone that would never come.
With a command the sinkhole dissipated. The combat AI backed up its ship, giving the Upsilon fighter space. The prisoner-capture ships moved in, but before they could reach it there was a flash of white—
When it faded, the prisoner-capture ships reported light damage to their shielding. The Upsilon fighter was naught but a cloud of plasma. Far away, the point of light solemnly joined back with the rest of the fleet and continued its journey.
Outside the window, the prisoner complex was highlighted and magnified, frozen against the event horizon. “Assemble the council again. Take another vote.”
“That wouldn’t accomplish anything,” came the voice of the gestalt hyperintelligence, cold as a splash of ice water.
“Damnit. Is there anything at all that we can do!?”
“Yes, Neumann. You can press the button.”
The button. Off to one side of the window-wall, pressing it would close the air-gapped controls to the containment cells. Then the system could carry out the predetermined course of action. The fate of an entire species, one of the most advanced in known space, bound to a single button.
Neumann strided over and pressed it. It wasn’t like he had any other choice—the Upsilon hadn’t given him one.
He watched on an infodisplay on the window as the steady flow of mass-energy to the containment cell holding the last of the Upsilon cut off. The light from the cell began to fade, shifting red ever so slowly.
To the captured Upsilon, nothing seemed amiss as it passed through the point of no return.
To Neumann and the rest of humanity, the image of the cell would remain there, frozen on the event horizon for centuries—a ghost.
>> The Halls of the Forgotten
Six limestone hallways stretched into the tesseract. Six mausoleums, for six dead species, six “everyone-and-everything-you’ve-ever-knowns”, forgotten to the void of time.
Operating out of the smallest room in the tesseract, it was Hauhet’s job to learn what had been lost, although wrangling with time was no easy feat. Millions of years of geological records had been analyzed thousands of times over hundreds of centuries, an unfathomable amount of information compiled into an additional six rooms worth of results.
Glancing at the plaques for rooms 2-7, they read:
The Ruins of New Mongolia, remnants of an enterprising race who almost made it to space. Their civilization lived for 12,045 years.
The Ghosts of the Upsilon, a species of rapid evolution, infinitely adaptable down to their own psychology. Yet the Upsilon couldn’t adapt to humanity. They lasted 4,583 years.
The Architects of Skye. The great monuments of their history stretch a span of 132,057 ± 500 years.
Firefly, named after the ancient television franchise. Aged ~33,000 years.
The Terraformers. 68,000 years.
Hyperion, age indeterminate.
They were the forgotten ones, history lost to the infinite ocean of time.
To Hauhet, this endless chaos was her playground; making patterns out of the noise, her passion.
Starting wave function collapse 677,903 using latest received states.
Then Hauhet turned her attention to the empty, 8th room at the end of the hallways, as she had thousands of times before. She had not been told who it was for. So, she had made the plaque for it herself.
Estimated time to completion, 12:36:14
From the limitless sea of information she would form correlations, among the different species, and then in between them. Iteration after iteration, events were compared, similarities and differences noted, and trends were checked time and again. Her analyses extended far beyond the individual species themselves.
Matching states with model…
It was quite a while ago that Hauhet had started seeing patterns. Some had been interesting. Others had been worrying. One in particular was, as she had put it, apocalyptic, for it extended not just in the past, but also past the present, and into the future.
Recalculating the Prophecy.
Hauhet would breeze through the calculations. Prophecies didn’t change, after all; and so the steps were simple, and the result simpler: a single percentage, the probability that determined if the Prophecy would prove true. The probability that determined if the name on the plaque would join the others in the Halls of the Forgotten.
Presently Hauhet turned her attention to the plaque, and the name engraved on it, in every language known to man. All of them she could read, and all of them said the same thing: Humanity.
Calculation complete. Resulting certainty: 100%
Starting wave function collapse 677,904…
>> Milky Way Galaxy
Humanity watched as star after star faded from the night sky. Each one was a billion, ten billion, a hundred billion souls, snuffed out like a candle out of wax.
With each star Humanity knew a part of themselves died, but they couldn’t feel it. They couldn’t feel what wasn’t there.
They vaguely remembered a time, long ago when Humanity was on the threshold of the stars, looking up at the universe, waiting to find others like them. Then they came across the Hyterrum Mind, a beautiful flower growing in the void. They had admired it, but eventually, it had faded to the back of their memory; flowers couldn’t talk, after all.
Then from the shadows of the riverbend came the Upsilon, a prey cornered on their path. They tried to soothe it, to back away, to go around it. But it lashed out, and it had kept fighting, all the way to its death.
Its corpse had joined the dozens of others strewn across the stars.
Now they looked down at the galaxy, the galaxy that they had conquered. It was an impressive feat. They had thought themselves on top of the world, beyond the clutches of evolution.
Now Humanity realized how wrong they were. Civilization was simply an organism, one level in complexity above multicellular life, and they had known all along that multicellular life had evolved 25 times independently. Yet only a few of those 25 lineages survived to form plants, animals, and fungi. It should have been obvious.
What happened to the other ones?
The dozens of dead civilizations was what had happened.
Humanity had conquered much, but never once had they conquered evolution, and now it was their turn to cross into the Great Beyond.
To join the forgotten.
And the last of the stars died out.
>> Starting conscious waveform collapse. Retrieving retrotemporal translations: terms, names, units.
Our universe is 14.2 billion years old, and yet, when we look up, no one seems to be looking back...
>> Carina-Sagittarius 040335837/2
A lone, winged creature strolled about in front of a striated cliff face, his two manipulator arms tracing over a peculiar band of color. With a wave of his tentacle-like arms the surface of the cliff rippled, its molecules flowing about to his will, and clumps of material freed themselves from the rock and hovered in the air.
Silicon, carbon…hmm. Those proportions seem off.
He knew, using the abilities gifted to him by evolution, the precise makeup of the cliff wall. What he didn’t know was how it came to be, and the once-great species behind its origin. The species that had called itself Humanity.
Sharp upper boundary…huh.
Around him stretched a small patch of unfamiliar short green stalks, the only significant lifeform on the dry, alien planet.
That's interesting.
And the grass swayed in the wind.

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